#i looked it up and couldn’t find any evidence that any animals were mistreated during filming & i hope that’s true bc ofc i have my worries

[likeimsittinginanairportbar]

water for elephants (2011)

dir. francis lawrence

[amiramorozova]

Dual Summoner and the Darkling pt. 50

Glossary: nichyev‘ya - nothing(s)

After we walked for so long I noticed it was getting late as he led us to a hotel. I questioned if we were staying there but he seemed to be focused. The man at the front seemed to be motioning up as we all went up there and I thought this was odd. As I looked back I noticed the man was just looking the other way as we made it into a room. It was dark and there was an eeriness to this.

"Why are we here?" I asked, he seemed to be focused on something in the corner as I watched. He'd been here before it was clear to me something had changed in the fold as I saw creatures walk out from the shadows. My skin crawled at the sight of them, they were shadows with nothing but forms and probably mouths. "We're going to wait for Alina, so I can thank her." Aleksander said, the sounds of the Grisha backing up as Aleksander gave a motion for those things to stay in the corner while he led me to a seat. I hadn't taken a chance to notice they were all in regular clothes. 

So these things he got from the fold? I thought 

Aleksander took a seat while waiting and he pulled me down where I was sitting in his lap and laid my head down. "As long as you side with me, the nichyev‘ya will never harm you." Aleksander whispered in my ear. I felt a sense of peace being near him but I wondered what happened to him while we were away from each other. The Aleksander I knew was in there somewhere and I needed to reach him but I wasn't feeling safe with those things.

We were there for a while before the sound of footsteps coming up the room was evident. I realized Alina and Mal must have been in this place. I'd known they were in Cofton and now Aleksander wanted revenge. "Aleksander, don't hurt them too bad." I begged, "Mal could be a useful tracker to help." I felt a shift in Aleksander as I must have had a good point, I couldn't see him very well but being in darkness like this with those things in the corner was not helping either.

When the door opened the Grisha who were working with Aleksander grabbed Alina and Mal, Ivan had a knife to Mal's throat as Alina had used light but it was useless. Aleksander picked me up and set me in the chair as he walked out. "Hello Alina." Aleksander said as my group stayed by the wall. They wouldn't move unless I motioned for them to do so. "Search her for any weapons and take them." Aleksander said as those Grisha were following his orders. "How did you find us?!" Alina demanded as he showed her the golden hairpin. 

"You and my wife leave an expensive trail." Aleksander said as she tried to get free. "I don't know where Amira is, she parted ways with me after we got here!" Alina said as Aleksander nodded and put his left hand on his right as the shadows left around me revealing me in the chair. "I found her first, being taken care of by someone connected to Baghra." Aleksander said as I was glad to get out of the shadows. "But I am not here to kill you Alina, even though you tried to do that with me and take away Amira's dreams of freedom and a family." Aleksander said as I just sat there. "No, I am here to thank you."

"Thank me?" Alina asked as Aleksander smirked and walked over to me as shadows surrounded us and he expanded his shadow protection to my guard group as I merely listened. The sounds of those things moving was evident, the fear in the other Grisha was evident and somehow I knew my group was safe. "You risk our people to those nothings?" I asked as Aleksander looked at me "They know who to go after." Aleksander said 

I had to sit there waiting as the fight was going on, the sound of the sun easy to tell but I was scared. I looked at Aleksander as I saw this was taking a lot out of him and tears formed in my eyes. "Stop this, please." I said as I got up and went over to him, placing a hand on his cheek. "Please. I can't bear the thought of you dying over these things." I said as he looked at me. For a second I thought he'd say no, he'd refuse my request but he put a hand on my cheek as he kissed me. I hadn't felt his lips against mine in two weeks. It was what I missed the most.

"This is for us." Aleksander said, "Just these two for now, we need to catch up but we need to get moving on the sea whip." the second amplifier of Morozova's amplifiers, I remember we talked about doing this together as I nod. When the shadows were released around us I saw that thing on Alina biting into her as he smirked. "Thank you Alina, for this gift." 

I looked at Alina, seeing her in pain. It made me feel bad as she fell unconscious and Aleksander made a hand motion as the nichyev‘ya backed off leaving to wherever he'd had it. He made a motion to his Grisha who were scared as he led me away. We kept walking for some time as we came to one of the better places and he walked in leading me to the room. He looked at my guards who'd followed motioning to the other rooms. "they're rented for the night. Tomorrow, we board the ship I paid for to take us to find the sea whip." Aleksander said 

As he led me inside, he let my hand go as he took off that shirt that didn't suit him. I saw him reach for his coat and his kefta but I walked over and made him look at me. I took in the appearance of faint scars on his skin as I carefully traced them. "You were hurt by the volcra." I said as I saw they were healed by a healer but still faintly there. "It's not your fault this happened, I thought Alina would understand the cause." Aleksander said 

You knocked me out when I could have helped. I thought

"At least you were safe during this whole thing, someone carried you off the skiff I assume." Aleksander said as I turned from him remembering what he did. "You killed west ravkans, the royals won't trust you now." I said as he sighed "Nothing a heartrender can't fix." Aleksander assured me. I removed the cloak revealing my kefta since I'd never parted with it even though it was an eyesore. "I see you kept your kefta, you really do look stunning but you probably must miss your parents, your brother and your cousin." Aleksander said as I turned around and looked at him. "Don't talk about them like they haven't heard. A heartrender can change the emotions and thoughts of a human but not Grisha!" I said suddenly angry

When I thought about it, what was I angry about, the actions he had done. No, I knew that was coming and blood was going to be shed. He was alive and it'd been two weeks before he found me. I was the one who talked Alina into using the golden hairpins knowing that it would lead us to him. I needed him to be by my side when things got bad, I had come to rely on him and maybe that was what bothered me. A year ago, I relied on no one and I was a loner who took pride in doing things her way, and now I wanted nothing more than to drown out the world and lay beside him. 

"You're angry, you have every right to be but it was not easy to get to Novi Zem." Aleksander said as I sighed just wanting to go to bed. All my outfits were back at the little palace and the kefta and jewelry was all I had of him for two weeks. I walked over to see he had a double bed and a private room so he was paying a lot for these rooms. Laying down it was peaceful and I laid there for who knows how long before I put the cloak on deciding to go out. Aleksander had followed me as I walked down the path as I had a few coins from Nico as I stopped by my favorite pie place and got one. "How are you doing Ms. Silina?" The baker asked, "Much better now, thank you." I said as I paid for the pie and when I turned around he was there looking at me. "You have a favorite pie?" Aleksander asked, "mhm, it's apple pie." I said as I walked out of the place. 

On the way back, I saw a dog run over to me and put his paw on my leg as I handed Aleksander the pie as I kneeled down. "Hi, well aren't you cute?" I said as the dog licked me and I laughed. I heard a man run over as the dog got behind me and I stood up seeing the man had a whip. "You found my dog, thank you miss." The man said as he went to reach for it but I moved where he couldn't. "Are you abusing this animal, mister?" I asked as I was prepared to out myself if I had to for an animal. I heard the dog whine as he looked at the man and I could just tell that this dog was probably better off with me.

"That dog doesn't listen to a thing I say, what makes you think you can do any better girl?" The man said as I noticed Aleksander didn't like the way this man talked to me. "I am capable of many things sir, but this dog ran to me when it was escaping you. I hear it whine and I can tell it's in fear or you've been mistreating it." I said as I saw Nico had come out to look for me. "How much for the dog?" He asked as he had his earnings for the day and the man looked back as he named a price. Nico tossed him a bag with Novi zem coins and motioned for the guy to get going as he looked at me. "Dog is yours Amira, better train it before we leave the area." Nico said before he walked away

I looked down at the dog as I kneel before realizing this dog was a five-month-old puppy. "You have to name the dog, Amira. The man didn't give you a name." Aleksander said as I nod looking at the sweet dog. "Shadow." I said as I stood up. The dog got up and wagged its tail as I smiled but looked at Aleksander. "Shadow, since the dog is black." Aleksander said as I led the way and Shadow followed while Aleksander walked beside me. "You wear black and control shadows." I reminded him.

We were in that hotel for a couple more days as Aleksander had to make sure the boat was secure and I had to make sure that everything was ok with Shadow. I was able to get a collar for her after we'd figured out that she was a girl and I made sure that my symbol was on her so they knew the Dual Summoner was her owner. When we boarded the boat I wasn't sure about this but I was going to make the best of it. 

Aleksander led me to a cabin and I was to stay there until we left shore. Shadow stayed with me and when I felt we were sailing for a while things got worse. I eventually had to run to the side of the ship and vomit. Aleksander went over to me as he looked at me and I looked at him. "You're getting sea sick? It's uncommon." Aleksander said, but as we were on that ship for days and Nico helped with Shadow he started to become suspicious. It wasn't just the boat going back and forth like when we'd came here or the food, just the tiniest thing made me sick. 

Nico was the first to approach me and he thought about it "Are you getting morning sickness?" Nico asked as I looked at him confused. "You're getting sick on the sea. I don't think it's sea sickness Amira. I think you're pregnant." Nico said as I sat there on the side of the ship listening as I thought about it over and over. I'd had small signs in Cofton of things making me sick and now it was worse on the sea. 

I'm expecting our first child? I thought 

TagList: @lifeisingrey,  @houseoftoomanyfandoms

[elizas-writing]

Thirteen Reasons Why is Torture Porn; Using Graphic Violence to Make a Point

CW/TW: Mentions of suicide, rape/sexual violence, physical assault, and everything the Thirteen Reasons Why crew were told NOT to do by mental health experts

If you are in a crisis, don’t let a poorly written TV show tell you what to do; call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or the Suicide Crisis Line at 1-800-784-2433. Surround yourself with people who will support you without judgement and are willing to take the extra step to understand. If you’re struggling to find regular mental health resources, check out here for more options. You still have a life ahead even if it takes some trial and error to figure out what the hell to do.

So Netflix released the second season of Thirteen Reasons Why, and, what a shock, people hate it for upping the graphic violence and rape. I have no plans to watch it myself after reading through all the triggers, but suffice it to say that so little was learned from the first season. Plus, I’d rather not subject myself to that much distress for a TV show I knew there was no point in continuing after the first season. Everyone’s accounts across Twitter and Tumblr of the new season seem to match up, so I’m going off of that for this piece.

If you haven’t seen my review of the first season (with and without spoilers), I found that it definitely went too far to make a point and had really confusing characterizations, but there were select scenes, when they were done right, were kinda worth the wait-- keyword being “kinda.” There was a germ of an idea begging for good writing, but got sucked into shock value for the sake of shock value. And the second season offers no promises to improve.

Of the multiple graphic scenes of this season, the one which sparked the most outrage was the final episode “Bye” as Tyler (a serial stalker) is brutalized and raped by his male classmates. As a result of being pushed too far, he brings practically a whole arsenal of guns to shoot up the school during a dance, but Clay peacefully disarms him before he can go through with it.

So apparently the creators saw the criticism of season one and thought, “So, you want to see more graphic violence, rape, and terribly confusing characterization?”

In an interview with The Hollywood Reporter, creator and showrunner, Brian Yorkey, wanted to explore more of Tyler’s psyche and “how a troubled man might be driven to consider this very difficult choice” after the bullying and ostracization he experienced in the first season. While I’d never wish rape on anyone, even fictional people--and a bunch of characters who mistreated him are total hypocrites--, Tyler is still beyond redemption for never understanding how his behavior destroyed Hannah’s sense of safety. The show puts him through that much brutalization to force audiences to feel sympathetic towards him while never critically analyzing why his stalking and coping mechanisms were wrong and unhealthy, regardless of what else was going on in his life.

It also promotes the dangerous idea that social outcasts and/or victims of bullying are likely to eventually become school shooters, which completely ignores factors like toxic masculinity or racist associations-- as was the case for shootings like Parkland and Santa Fe from this year-- which contribute to a white male sense of entitlement. Even though the lapses in logic are all over the place in the show-- particularly Clay having an emotional breakdown with Tyler, even though he made things worse in the first place by sharing revenge porn--, people had every right to distance themselves from Tyler as much as possible.

He’s a creep in how he objectifies his female classmates, constantly collects sensitive photos for blackmail, and his main outlet for anger becomes shooting guns at bottles and live animals, because society as a whole tends to only show men how to be emotional through anger and nothing else. This doesn’t help that when he testified, he apparently wanted to befriend Hannah to take photos of her to which she rejected (rightfully so) and thus his stalking began. It’s already so back-and-forth among viewers if Hannah committed suicide out of revenge or actual mental health deterioration, and subtly putting blame on her for rejecting Tyler is up there as one of the worst things they did to her. Not to mention throughout the second season, Tyler is anonymously putting up polaroids around the school of incriminating evidence in the case, particularly with Jessica, who is already stressed as is coming to terms that she was raped by Bryce.

It’s upon these scenes that I realized Netflix’s Thirteen Reasons Why can’t decide who it’s supposed to be for. It’s not for teenagers with how unrealistic and unidentifiable the characters are, especially coming from an adaptation of an 11-year-old book with an outdated understanding of teen mental health, bullying and suicide. It’s most definitely not for mentally ill folks with a history of suicidal thoughts because it’s so graphic, violent, and triggering, and on top of which, is grossly inaccurate on how depression works. Are they making it for the same people who can stomach Game of Thrones easily?

Above all else, does graphic violence have any point in film or television?

As mentioned in their first Beyond the Reasons special, the writers argued about needing that authenticity for Hannah’s rape and suicide scenes “to be painful to watch,” but it’s really not worth it if it has nothing else to say besides “look at this excess violence; you need to feel bad.” If you need to spoon feed your audience an explicit rape or suicide scene to emphasize how horrible those things are, it’s bad writing. They made the same mistakes with Tyler’s brutalization, which like I said, only exists to make you feel sorry for him and almost forget he’s an irredeemable character.

Film and television are super creative visual mediums; there are ways to convey an emotion or theme without triggering content or alienating your supposed intended audience.

I mentioned this before in my first review, but Perks of Being a Wallflower did incredibly well in portraying child molestation and an attempted suicide without going too far. The scenes of the molestation are cleverly cut and mostly in shadow where all you can see is Charlie’s aunt rubbing his leg and hear her whispering “Don’t wake your sister.” And when he’s mentally breaking down and suicidal, the camera just pans to the knife slowly before immediately cutting to the police breaking in, and then Charlie wakes up in the psychiatric ward. It’s a gut-wrenching scene every time, but it’s also smart in remembering the intended audience and walking that line before it becomes too much. It’s a great depiction of an anxiety attack where everything overwhelms you at once, and sometimes there’s gaps in your memory in what happened while in that state of panic. It’s never addressed what happened between the police arriving and Charlie waking up in the psychiatric ward. But it doesn’t need to give those answers; what matters most is that Charlie is safe and finally going to get the help he needs.

A scene can be way more powerful in what it omits rather than what it explicitly shows. What you imagine might happen can be more exciting and/or terrifying than what any director could have put on the screen themselves.

Early horror and thriller films are among the most successful of this, especially if they’re directed by Alfred Hitchcock, the Master of Suspense. Sure, these films seem pretty cheesy when we in the 21st century are used to seeing much more violence and body horror, but they have their mark on cinematic history for a reason, and for an audience in the 1960s, this was horrifying. Take the famous shower scene from Psycho.

Instead of showing the knife penetrating flesh, it’s all edited in near-rapid cuts of “Mother” missing, Marion screaming and trying to defend herself, and shots of her feet with blood dripping into the water. It focuses more on the vulnerability of the situation, when there’s no chance for escape as you’re cornered against the wall and how quickly it all happens before you can react, complete with fast-paced editing and those high pitched violins. That kind of defenselessness freaked out actress Janet Leigh so much that she couldn’t take showers again without locking the doors and windows and leaving the shower door open. Hell, that still tends to be a common reaction for a lot of people who see this movie, and all without needing to show actual stab wounds.

And this trick in omitting some elements and highlighting others works well across genres for any scene motivated by any strong emotion. There’s probably about 50 different Disney films I can cite that do this well, but the one that sticks out the most is Tarzan.

Aside from Phil Collins singing, some animal noises, and a baby cooing, there is no spoken dialogue for the first 7 minutes, which is a really long time for an animated family film. Yeah, the song kinda hamfists in the themes of family and love from the get-go, but it’s otherwise a great introduction. You see these two families just starting out before they’re cut short by tragedy; one with the death of a baby gorilla and the other with the death of Tarzan’s parents, both at the jaws of Sabor. The former is only indicated by the sounds of the baby gorilla’s screams echoing in the jungle while we only see the aftermath of the latter through Kala’s perspective when she finds Tarzan.

Obviously with it being a Disney family film, they’re not going to actually show Sabor tearing up a baby gorilla or the human parents. As such, they have to rely on context clues for the audience to pick up and piece together everything else with their imaginations. When you think about it long enough, it’s a really dark beginning on how quickly unexpected tragedy can destroy everything you hold dear. And it’s all accomplished without going too far.

Does this mean we need to omit graphic violence entirely for a film? Not necessarily as it very much depends on what the film is and your target audience. But omission is a great practice in a story to explore what else you have to say besides “Look at this traumatizing shit. You should feel bad.” Of course, we’ll always have mindless films which just exist to be violent, and historical narratives and/or social commentaries in some cases need violence to portray the reality of a situation. But when you’re making something about mental illness with intent to help those like your characters, it helps to listen to what your audience and mental health experts actually want to see in such a narrative. And like I said before, the Thirteen Reasons Why creators completely ignored criticisms of season one and continued making the same mistakes just to milk their product beyond the source material. It has nothing else to say or do besides being needlessly gritty as opposed to creating likable characters or understandable motivations.

The only exception to this rule I can even think of is Deadpool 2.

I know it seems counter-intuitive to compare Deadpool 2 and Thirteen Reasons Why given the former’s more excessive violence, but bare with me here. I stand by that Deadpool 2 is way better at handling themes of suicide and violence in two hours than Thirteen Reasons Why ever did in 26 episodes.

The major differences? The intended audience’s expectations and well-written characterization.

Most everyone going in already knows what Wade Wilson is like. And this is definitely not the first time he attempted suicide in such grandiose and gratuitous fashion. The first film established itself as a wildly violent parody of superhero films, and the sequel continues that by poking fun at recent trends of these films going darker and grittier. In any other film, this would cross the line, but because it’s Deadpool, the excessively grotesque violence is to be expected. It succeeds in capturing the shock and dark humor (i.e Wade blowing himself up with his apartment, knowing fully well he can’t die) while still maintaining the weight of his emotional turmoil.

We actually get to know who Wade is and why he acts the way he does. There’s no drawn out mystery or fact-checking other sources or confronting side characters we don’t care about. We get his perspective alone, and that’s all we need to see his grief over Vanessa escalating to self-destructive behaviors and how he tries to find some family and meaning in life without her, even though her death is retconned in the end anyway. It’s all played for laughs, but you can’t help but feel sorry for Wade because he loved Vanessa so much, and they were a wonderfully sweet couple.

Another thing Deadpool 2 does significantly better than Thirteen Reasons Why is not forcing gray morality where it doesn’t belong, particularly when Wade tries to save Russell. It doesn’t matter if his actions lead to a horrible future; he’s just a traumatized kid who needs a proper family who will guide him. A lot of X-Men films try to play the heroes as the bigger people who are above murder and revenge. Yet Deadpool 2 doesn’t punish those like Russell with understandable hatred and motivations. It is very upfront that if you harm children, you deserve whatever hell comes your way-- which really hits home as Russell was put through metaphorical gay conversion therapy.

Meanwhile, I can’t even be bothered to care about anyone in Thirteen Reasons Why. The second season out of nowhere piles on excuse after excuse to justify the characters’ actions without them ever facing guilt or consequences. Anyone else with a remote chance at sympathy is just put through more emotional torture without rhyme or reason. I don’t care who has a drug problem, who’s gay, who dated who, the he-said-she-said, etc etc. If you’re trying to preach the ever-tired “it gets better” bullshit, when does it actually start to get better?

Sadly, Thirteen Reasons Why can’t find that point, and I don’t trust it will given how little the creators learned from the first season’s criticisms. They don’t care about creating a narrative to help mentally ill teens. They have nothing else to say or do than to make money and shoe-horned in so much graphic violence under the guise of being “authentic” to compensate for a tired Degrassi knockoff which would’ve disappeared if it wasn’t based on a well-known YA novel. Graphic violence in media is a tool to be used carefully, and of course it will vary project to project. But if it just exists to pad your “deep, meaningful” story instead of developing characters, motivations and relationships, then it’s cheap, lazy torture porn, and it’s bad writing.

If you enjoyed this analysis and what I do here, consider buying me a ko-fi to show your support!

[karumchaoui-blog]

My Philosophy on Dog Training part 3

Once your dog's entire makeup is clear to you, you'll find it easier to do the right thing automatically. And knowing the full range of feats that dogs can perform will give you greater confidence for the more elementary steps. The Love Fallacy One of the chief reasons we have difficulty understanding dogs is, paradoxically, because.they've been associated with us for such a long time-so much so that we take them for granted. The first evidence of dog's association with man is found at the Mesolithic site of Star Carr in England about 9500 B.c when the 

dog's superior sense of smell probably directed man to within bowshot of food animals. Recently in the ruins of Pompeii the lava casts of the bodies of a little boy and his huge dog were found. On the dog's bronze collar was the still legible inscription: "This dog has saved his little master three times once from fire, once from drowning, and once from thieves." The dog had obviously tried to rescue his master once more. * Very few domestic animals were found in the archaeological excavations of Pompeii. Animals instinctively know of impending catastrophe, and obviously most of the dogs fled before the eruption occurred. The night before the San Francisco earthquake in 1906, dogs barked strangely. Horses snorted and stampeded minutes before anyone realized what was going on. In the mountains of Sicily, people leave their houses should the dogs suddenly exit. * In England,medals and trophies are awarded for canine bravery. One is the National Canine Defense League Medal, the dog's version of the Victoria Cross. Swansea Jack, a black retriever, saved twenty-seven people from drowning at the Swansea Docks and was awarded the dog's V.C. Chum was decorated by the Duke of Gloucester for bravery in saving two people from a fire. The dog was sixteen years old. John Garfield once turned down a film role which required him to mistreat a dog. "Slapping women, robbing kids, yes, but the public would never forgive anyone who kicked a dog." One of my most unforgettable clients was a man in his forties who had built a towering reputation in New York's manufacturing community. Midway through his executive life, he acquired a Newfoundland puppy. He found that he had barely enough time to play with the dog when he came home in the evening. Most owners would compromise with such a p full schedule, but not this gentleman. He retired from his enormously successful business and moved away from his family. During the winters he and the Newfoundland went to live in Florida, where he served as a cabana attendant. In the summers he came north again, to tend bar and have the full day to spend with his dog. For seven years he relished his full-time companionship, never missing his previously wealthy life. Then tragedy struck; the Newfoundland became ill with a spine problem. Over $ 10,000 was spent on surgery and recuperation kennels, but the dog was still unable to walk. His owner hired physiotherapists to take the dog swimming each day in the surf-but to no avail, and eventually he had his pet put to sleep. Heartbroken, the man no longer had any "excuse to keep on with his nomadic existence”. He went back to his old line of work, and in a few short months, he had turned a few inventive ideas into a fortune. This brought him no particular joy, but his success was a thorn in the side of his competitors who retaliated-if you can call it that-by leaving another lovely puppy literally on the doorstep of his brownstone. And indeed, he became so involved with his new pet that again he left his business to spend his waking hours with a four-legged companion. An unhappy majority of the population work at jobs they don't like, taking orders from others, forced to hold back their emotions. When they return home in the evening, their only emotional outlet is through their family or their pets. Those who live alone have no immediate family, so they use the dog to balance the day's ledgers either by being nice or being nasty. When they realize that the animal will accept them with no backtalk, they usually look forward to coming home and enjoying their animal. I always remind owners that the ultimate one-to-one relationship is with another person. But if a man wants to take a walk after supper to relax and do some heavy thinking, who does he choose to take along-his wife, his kids, or the dog? People can tell a dog anything, be inconsistent and ill-tempered, and still be assured of faithful love. Some people tell me that if it weren't for their dogs, they couldn't have gotten through moments of stress. When I'm bothered about certain things, I find it relaxing just walking and playing and even talking to my dog. My wife finds pleasure holding her dog in her arms and dancing with him to some good music. I hate to admit it, but if I had to choose between saving my dog and a total human stranger, I would probably save the dog. Check the daily listings in the newspapers lost-and-found column to see how much the average dog can mean to its owners. And once a dog is adopted into the family, no expense seems too high to be justified. An interesting example of this occurred to a New York couple, each of whom was extremely wrapped up in a career. They acquired a collie and since neither was able to walk the animal on any regular schedule, a professional dog walking service was hired. When the husband complained about the bills, the wife told him simply, ,It's too late. “The dog is already part of the family." The status conscious will pick a breed that's very showy and obviously very expensive: a saluki, Afghan, or Russian wolfhound. The dogs that New York's -swinging singles pick are all very good measurements of what the owners want you to think of them. But the owners who worry me are those who choose certain breeds to compensate for their own deficiencies. Some people want very aggressive dogs because either they are, or want to be, aggressive people. Specifically, I find that many owners themselves are physically shy and feel put-upon. So they choose a dog who's anything but. The most common problem, of course, is that the shy master finds it difficult to control an animal he has already decided is 46 stronger' than he is. Many people consider their dog a human being, or at least a creature who appreciates the same luxuries we do. Who hasn't seen households with covered-up chairs for the dog's comfort, televisions turned to a certain channel "for the dogs"? On Park Avenue, there's a poodle who lives in the utmost of style. He has steps up to his bed so that he doesn't have to jump. A rubber mat lies under his sheets, which are changed daily by a maid hired especially for this purpose. The poodle is fed pits, caviar, and champagne, and has a tailor-made wardrobe. His mistress doesn't want to inhibit him in any way. A middle-aged woman called me to check on what supplies she would need for a weekend trip to the Poconos. When questioned what she had already added to the carload, she listed dog deodorizer, foam cushions, food, water bowls, chew bones, toys, a spatula, and a New York Times.