#i look awful and havent showered yet sorry

[kiyokothehuman]

Beautiful Stranger

pairing: alhaitham x reader

summary: alhaitham giving you life advice

a/n: this was inspired by laufeys song "beautiful stranger"!! ALSO to the anon that requested this i am so sorry for not writing this sooner, this been in my inbox for months but i never had the time to write 💀

you sat on the docks of port ormos as your feet swayed against the ocean. you slowly inhaled the smell of the sea as the soft texture of grass gently tickled your skin. it was moments like these you truly appreciated life. you heard footsteps behind your back as you looked over to see a handsome young man looking over at the seas.

no, wait it's rude to stare. you thought as you quickly turned your head back. he looked like he was enjoying the silence, but some part of you wanted to go up and talk to him. you hesitated as you fiddled with your fingers.he looked somewhat troubled or lonely, you could practically sense a touch of sadness in his presence.

so, you mustered up your courage and decided to speak with the grey haired man. putting your sandals on and getting up from your spot, you quietly approached him and tapped his shoulder.

"hello!" you greeted, cheerfully, a smile presented on your face. he turned to you, looking stern. "may i help you?" he answered, raising a brow at the situation.

"no, no. i just wanted to have some small talk, thats all." you replied, followed by a small chuckle. "do you come here often?" you asked, sitting back down at the wooden docks.

he looked down on you, his face showing a hint of amusement. "not really, i'm too caught up in work to spend my time here." he replied, his grey hair flowing against the wind. he looked angelic, almost.

"ah, i see. where do you work?" you questioned, looking at the ocean view in front of you. "i work in the academia. what about you?" he responded. your eyes were suddenly filled with sorrow, and he could feel your demeanor change.

"unemployed at the moment, heh. here take a seat first." you offered, patting the area beside you as he sat down next to you. it was as if you were relieving memories with a friend, except this 'friend' is a stranger you knew nothing about.

"ever since i got rejected from the academia, i kind of just lost motivation from doing anything." you answered. although your voice was cheerful, there was a hidden sadness laced in your tone.

"why?" he questioned.

"i didn't know my purpose in life anymore." you responded, your voice devoid of any emotion. "the academia was what I thought would give meaning to my life, when i got rejected, i felt as if a great depression reigned over me." you added, your voice growing quieter and quieter for each word you spoke.

for you, the academia was like a light in darkness. a light that quickly shut you down once you've gotten close. the light you thought would save yourself from the darkness you were trapped in, but was only an illusion from your unrealistic ideals.

"how so? your purpose isnt found in pathetic schools that do nothing more than pressure its students. you are the one that will discover the meaning of your life." he stated, his eyes immersed at the ocean blue waters.

"as a human, our life span is incredibly short. so live one thats worth dying for instead of mourning for your failures." he added to which you just stared at him in awe, the sun gently showered over his features, as if he was an angel sent by heaven. how you wish a view like this could be seen throughout the seas.

"has anyone told you how beautiful you are?" you muttered without knowing.

"huh?" he looked at you in amusement, before a blush crept up to your ears. "i mean- sorry, please ignore that." you apologized looking down at your lap, desperately trying to rid your embarrassment.

"oh wait, i havent even gotten your name yet!" you panicked looking at the man as he chuckled. "alhaitham. and you are?" he asked as you smiled. "y/n."

alhaitham suddenly stood up, before speaking once again. "i apologize, but something has come up and i must take my leave." he stated.

just as he was about to leave, he spoke once again. "you truly are an interesting individual, y/n." he whispered in a volume that only you could hear. "it was nice meeting you, i hope that one day our paths will cross once more." he added before walking away.

"alhaitham." you unconsciously muttered.

you liked how the syllables of his name simply rolled off from your tongue. this man was quite the character. you wonder what kind of person he really is under that mask. but, something tells you that you've seen a glimpse of the person he really is. all this led you yearning to learn for more.

[perpetually-sad-but-its-fine]

chicago fire 11x10

I WANNA KNOW WHAT HAPPENED

I HAVENT STARTED PLAYING THE EPISODE YET

IM TRYING TO MENTALLY PREPARE MYSELF

CUZ I CANT HANDLE THIS

i don't like this recap

its scaring me

EMMA FUCK OFF

NO STELLA

WHATS HAPPENING

carvers gonna die isn't he

I DONT WANT HIM TO

OH GOD

PLEASE

I CANT HANDLE THIS

oh poor kelly

hiS WIFES IN THERE

KELLY

YOURE GOING IN THERE WITH NO PROTECTION

NO COME ON

I CNT HANDLE THIS

STELLA

S T E L L A

WHERE ARE YOU

PLEASE BE OKAY

OH MY GOD

NO

OH MY GOD

oh my god carvers okay

oh YAY

THEYRE ALIVE

STELLA

PLEASE BE OKAY

STELLA

WHY WOULD YOU HURT ME AND KELLY LIKE THIS

PLEASE

PLEASE BE OKAY

DONT DO THIS TO US

IM NOT STRONG ENOUGH

oh my god

severide barely holding back tears

no

im sorry

im not strong enough

SHE TOOK OFF THE MASK TO AS ABOUT PRYMA

SHES A HERO

‘my heart rate must be breaking records’

‘yeah its a little elevated but youre gonna be okay’

good to see that they can still joke

fantastic

aS IF IM NOT DYING WATCHING IT

SOOOO CONSIDERATE

DIAGNOSING HERSELF WHILE DYING

violet driving like a madwoman

we love it

‘hell yes, gimme everything you got’

STELLA PLEASE BE OKAY

keLLY IM GONNA CRY IF YOU CRY

PLEASE DONT

‘i can't

YES YOU CAN

DONT DO THIS

oh god

blake why the hell are you telling the story right now

nowS NOT THE TIME

CARVERS OKAY

IM SO HAPPY

i really like his character

aw

poor guys sitting apart from them

he probably blames himself

poor guy

oh joes stiLL WEARING THE SUIT

I LOWKEY FORGOT ABOUT THE LAST EPISODE

Joe looking out for carver is great

oh no

do they blame him????

please tell me they don't

carver needs family

‘we’re all here for you’

THEY ARE

SO DONT BE A DUMBASS

KELLY

IS SHE OKAY

OH THANK GOD

SHES GONNA BE OKAY

HE LOOKS LIKE HES BEEN CRYING

MY POOR BOY

oh carver

KELLY

HES CRYING

IM N O T OKAY

THE BLOOD ON HIS HANDS

WHERE THE HELL IS MATT TO COMFORT HIM

oh god

carver and boden

how's this gonna go???

uh oh

started out normal

now what's this?

oh free therapy session

carver please listen to boden

he’s looking out for you

god

his voice is breaking

and so am i 

I caNNOT HANDLE THIS

ph shit wait

is carver gonna realize that he can't handle the stress

and then resign altogether?

CUZ I DONT WANT THAT

oh kelly

being a good husband

NO STELLA

why'd you do that

my girl

why

STELLA AND KELLy

THE LOVES OF MY LIFE

‘have you been here all day?’

‘im not going anywehre’

AHHHHHH

THERYE ADORABLE

THEY DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER

wait

carver

whyd you stop

go talk to her

istg if this is some sort of failed love triangle thing

im gonna shoot someone

oh that scar

stella

PLEASE

THEYRE HORNY TEENAGERS

THEYRE SO HORNY

HOW ARE THEY NOT FUCKING EVERY SECONF OF THE DAY

‘shrapnel framed’

i wanna see that actually

oh capp wearing a bomb suit

i wanna see that

everyone guessing what it sylvie ordered is great

peak comedy

sylvie asking for help and then guilt tripping them

and then all of them groaning

we love it

oh poor violet

what happened

oh emma

again

yay

violet this is gonna backfire

i can feel it

thank you gallo

for looking out for her

thE SCAR

‘it’s no big deal, we shower and sleep together’

*confused smirk look*

‘yknow what i mean’

god

if they do some sort of bullshit of carver having feelings for stella 

i will hunt down chicago fire writers and slap them

‘he’s no stella kidd’

aint that the truth

stella unable to take a compliment from carver is great

what's happening here

i have a bad feeling

somethings gonna happen

i know it will

there's no way that this is an accident

this feels fishy

oh what is that

im scared

HOLY SHIT

wHaT

‘someones in the vent’

how in the fuck is that possible

lieutenant kidd being a boss

like she always is

we love it

oh no

carvers gonna have some sort of reaction isn't he

oh no

this is like joe thing isn't it

no

i can't

this poor dude

who is this guy

uh oh

tweaker

isn't it

uh oh

this isn't gonna end well

if you hurt stella

ill murder him

no

please don't do anything stupid

carver

what's going on with you

seriously

please tell me that you don't have feelings for Stella

i won't be able to handle that

oh violet and boden

oh no

this isn't gonna end well

is it?

boden further proving that he is the father of everyone in the house

love to see it

worried!husband!kelly

we love it

‘decades of italian beef grease’

loving the jokes

CARVER

PLEASE BE OKAY

please talk to kidd

no

that's not what she wants

please

just

please

TALK TO SOMEONE

WORK THROUGH YOUR PROBLEMS

oh

this’ll be fun

gallo is the resident tech guy

love it

oh yippee

i love it

IM CACKLING

thank you sylvie

youre fantastic

i feel like sylvies going to adopt a baby that's put in that box

i don't like this chief already

hes a dick

i can feel it

oh

this is gonna be f u n

oh no

this isn't gonna end well

please

I WANT TO GET RID OF JACOBS

no

i hate this

god stop reminding me that evan died

NO VIOLET

IF SHE STARTS CRYING I WILL

NO STELLA

NO

NO

NO

‘hey, honey!’

GOD HE CALLED HER HONEy

IM CRYINGGG

STOP HURTING ME DAMMIT

no stella

im crying

stop

stop

stop

stoppppp

I CANT

WHY CANT WE HAVE PEACE

kelly looks like hes gonna cry too

yay

we’re all crying

oh kelly and gallo

yay

this is gonna hurt me even more

kelly please go talk to them

AHHAHAHA

THE ALARM

I fucking love the way they jumped at the sound

its great

sylvie immediately turning to herrmann

we love to see it

OH MY GOD

THERES A BABY THERE

ISNT THERE

oh wait

is it gonna be some dude who mistook it for a trash can?

wait

i don't know what's happening

oh nvm

LMAOOOO

capp

shut the fuck up

thank you sylvie

‘do we blame her though’

no

we do not

great

hes now going through the trash for his food

yay

oh prYMA

i completely forgot about him

oh the tech squad

we love to see it

oh no

poor violet

LMAOOO GALLO

‘i didn't think so, i was just trying to help’

god they make me laugh

and they make me cry

violet

you said that this want about revenge

it looks like it was about revenge

oh stella and kelly

with topic of carver as a topic for conversation

oh please

make them talk

‘you going soft on me kelly severide?’

i love them

‘good, cuz if he touches your hand hes a dead man’

I LOVE KELLY SO MYCH

stella please listen to your husband

herrmann

what're you doing

why do i feel like theres something more

i don't think there is

but still

oh

stella

talk to him

talk to carver

please

carver if you think this is a date, ill smack you

emma FUCK OFF

jacobs

youre really giving me the vibe of super villain

wait

violet has an idea

*gasp*

IS SHE GONNA MAKE EMMA SAY WHAT SHE DID AND RECORDIT????

sylvie looks so GOOD

oh MS GOODWIN

ms goodwin and sylvie is a duo i never knew i needed

they are amazing

a power duo

truly

who is this?

kelly what're you doing

OH PRYMA

how's this gonna go?

oh damn they're joking

i love it

actually

i do

pryma being a dad is such a surprise to me

‘just shut up and take the award’

‘i will’

PLEASE I LOVE THIS NEW DYNAMIC

oh damn

that was a real damper

thank you violet

for realizing that you were doing it for revenge

you are smart

oh stella and carver

please

just talk

‘why do I feel like im about to be led to a firing squad’

‘oh we really don't trust each other much, do we?’

‘mhm’

I LOVE THEIR BANTER

please talk to each other

please

YES

they're getting somewhere!

carver please reciprocate

please

‘not more than usual’

the hell does that mean?

carver don't lie

‘your overconfidence, bad attitude, is completely gone’

‘you miss them?’

‘and that's called deflection’

PLEASE MAKE THEM BESTIES

please talk to her carver

oh no

im gonna start crying again

please

stop hurting her

oh no

hes referencing his scar isn't he

whAT HAPPENED

PLEASE TELL ME

I CANT HANDLE THIS

oh no

stop

stOP

STOP

NOOOOO

POOR CARVER

WHAT

CARVER MY POOR CHILD

MY POOR POOR CHILD

good god

what kind of big brother does that?

noooooooo

I CANT HANDLE THIS

NO

FUCK OFF

STOP HURTING ME

S T O P

HOW CAN YOU DO THIS

im in pain

‘you got hurt by covering me’

chicago fire writers, im send you my therapy bill

‘I will pull it together, per my lieutenants orders’

pleASE I LOVE THEM

AND I WANT THEM TO BE BESTIES

[spilledstrawberriestheblog]

Diary No.19

Hii it's hard to wrote diary entries on weekends becuz I'm always with my sister.

I had a dream that I somehow told [🐈‍⬛️] that I liked someone but not pursuing it becuz of reasons. [🐕] and his friends plus my old crush from like 6 years ago showed up and [🐈‍⬛️] started chasing him around i think they stole his phone or something im not sure and it supposedly started a while becuz at the end of it [🐈‍⬛️] said "if he had time to run around like this all day and not stop to pray then hes probably not as religious as you think".

i dunno it was a weird dream and yeah.

i dunno this is all so weird i dunno how to feel.

Last night [❤️] sent me a message, a really long one. They wanted to talk to me about how theyve been feeling latley.. it was about their crush on [🧟‍♀️].

Aparently [🧟‍♀️] has confessed to someone and [❤️] thinks it might be [🐈‍⬛️] becuase when [❤️] asked [🐈‍⬛️] if they had a crush on anyone they said they think someone in art class has a crush on them (which we are assuming is [🧟‍♀️]).

It was really stressful to sit through the texts becuase it brought up a lot of memories from when i had a crush on [❤️] and how heartbroken i felt when i found out it wasnt mutual. I didnt want to make it about me ofc so i tried my best to support [❤️] and make them feel better. It just hurt a lot becuase they push themselves down so much and kept saying that no one will ever love them. Like what was my confession for? did that mean nothing to them? i know its not about me right now but was that no sort of validation for them?? i dont know it just made me feel sick, invisible and my body wouldnt stop shaking the whole time. I also found a giant spider in my dormroom so the whole time i just felt really uncomftorble, unsafe and sad.

Its been a shitty weekend. Im so tired and i cant relax becuz of history/literature homework and i had to go shopping yesterday which took all day.

And my friends dont seem to be feeling well so everything just feels like a big pit of despair. I dont have the mental energy to be a therapist and look after everyone and myself. I can barely get myself to shower, dress up, keep my room tidy or do anything that makes me happy. I feel like a robot and its hard to keep up everything feels so fast yet the weeks feel so long.

Im scared that its already late sunday and i havent felt rested at all and the new week is about to start. It feels scary. Im scared i cant help those around me and i dont want to be alone.

I just feel so sad, i dont feel safe anywhere. I found another big spider in my room this morning and had to spray it again but it hid so i dunno if it worked and my room just smells awful again becuz of the spray and i hate it its so overwhelming. And my homework is so hard to read and process even though its not complicated at all so i just feel stupid.

Oh yeah i had a dream a few days ago where [❤️] sent me a long message venting but i didnt respond and when i woke up fr it was so confusing and i panicked becuase i thought i left them on read, it wasnt real tho.

sorry for such a heavy entry its been a lot. aaaaaa T.T

I just want to read romance manga to forget how lonely i feel and indulge in my stories so i dont have to think of anything. Just drown my brain with stuff that isnt real.

At the same time i feel like none of my feelings are real and im probably just being stupid and making stuff up. I probably only want a partner to feel validation in my existance. I feel sick writing this i cant goodbye ill write later i guess bleugh

[princesstigerbelle]

Her face ‼️❤️😂

[starglow-xx]

retrouvaille

nakajima atsushi x f!reader

fandom: bungou stray dogs

content: hurt comfort, fluff

warning! : mentions of abuse

type of work: one-shot

synopsis: he left the orphanage, and that meant he had to leave you too; fortunately, this time, it seems like the universe was on your side

a/n: this is kinda self indulgent bc ive been feeling kinda down lately...?? and this has been sitting in my drafts for a while now and i havent posted in a while so killing three birds w/ one stone ig

the word retrouvaille is a french noun...

The moment you stepped foot into the armed detective agency, heterochromia eyes met your (e/c) ones.

You notice several agents talking and walking over to assist you, but you drown them out only having focus on the gray haired male ten feet away from you.

Said male takes a small step forward with uncertainty and disbelief laced in his voice.

“(y-y/n)...?” 

At the sound of your name, your eyes immediately begin to water and with pure relief in your voice, you softly sob his name; the name of the boy who comforted you when you were both still in that wretched place.

“Atsushi...”

With all hesitation gone, Atsushi runs over to you shoving through his surprised and confused coworkers and wraps his arms tightly around you.

The force of the hug causes the both of you to stumble and harshly crash to the ground beneath you.

But the two of you didn’t care.

In his arms was a person Atsushi thought he’d never be able to see again.

In his arms was the same girl who snuck him food from the kitchens, the girl who stole medical supplies from the infirmary to treat his wounds, to take care of him when he was sick, and the girl who received punishment after punishment for insisting on staying with him inside his damn cell.

You gave him happiness in place where he should’ve never been able to receive it.

As if he ever felt like he deserved it in the first place.

You’re too good for him, but yet you still chose him.

You, his sweet and kind, his so very kind, and so very beautiful girlfriend, chose him, the cursed, good for nothing orphan.

The orphanage staff treated you considerably better before the two of you were acquainted, so Atsushi knew he was the problem. That he was the reason why tears would fall onto your beautiful face, why bruises and scars would litter your arms and legs, and why the staff would call you awful, degrading nicknames about you and or your virtue.

He had always thought that he wasn’t good for you, that he didn’t deserve you, that you could do better, but you stayed by his side regardless of his fears and insecurities, and provided him the strength and comfort he had always been deprived of.

And to his very surprise, he found that you found your own strength and comfort in him.

So he knew that you must of cried for weeks after he was kicked out, that you must’ve been devastated to wake up one morning only to learn that he was gone without a trace.

There wasn’t a single day that he never thought of you.

Atsushi wanted to go back for you, he really did; he wanted to storm into the orphanage with members of the armed detective agency, his new family, right at his tail before eventually reuniting with you.

But he didn’t do that.

Ultimately, he chose to leave you out of the mess that came with his job knowing that you would be eventually targeted and used against him if anyone found out about what he had with you.

So he kept quiet.

No mafioso, government agent, foreign organization, nor agency member had a clue about your connection with him, much less your existence.

He told himself that when things have calmed down by a considerable amount, he would go back and get you, with or without the agency backing him up.

Unfortunately, he knew that time of peace was far from the present.

But to see you, in your beautiful glory, standing at the threshold of the agency? 

His original plan to keep you away from Yokohoma flew out the damn window. 

At the sight of you, his heart did backflips and his legs almost gave out. 

Ignoring the jelly feeling in his legs and the loud pounding of his heart, he raced around the desks and his coworkers—nearly fully crashing into Dazai in the process—to once more engulf you into his arms.

As for you?

When you saw him, you felt like you were going to pass out.

Your legs grew weak, your entire body was shaking, and tears started to fall down your face.

He was here.

He was safe and he was alive.

You mourned his abrupt disappearance from the orphanage and spent most of your time worrying about his well being.

The staff thought you were pathetic, that you sulked and cried over someone who they thought should disappear off the face of the earth.

They could insult and beat you all you want, but you drew the line when it came to Atsushi.

Finally having enough of everything, you planned your escape.

You were patient; you never jumped the gun nor gave anything away. You planned everything to the very last, minute detail, and after a few more months of abuse and waiting, you put your plan into action and left in the dead of night.

Thankfully, a kind old couple took you after you had collapsed in the streets. You worked job after job after job to return everything they had spent on your behalf even after they had told you not to worry about it.

And after another few weeks, you finally caught wind of your lost boyfriend tracking him down to Yokohoma through an old newspaper article.

Knowing your boyfriend, and yourself, you knew that tears would easily escape both of your eyes due to the long duration of your separation, but you weren’t expecting to find yourself crashing onto the floors of the armed detective agency curtesy of Atsushi. 

But, you wouldn’t have it any other way because in your arms was the boy who gave you comfort during the most darkest days in the orphanage, the boy who laid you in his lap or on his stomach stroking your hair so you would fall asleep, and the boy who often threw himself in front of you so you would remain unharmed.

You choked on your sobs as you tightened your own hold on him and they gradually grew louder as you buried your face into the shoulder of his white button up.

Through his own choked sobs and teary eyes, Atsushi gently maneuvered the two of you so that you would be lying on his stomach—a familiar position the two of you would lay in back in the orphanage.

He gently stroked his fingers through your hair and softly rubbed your back as he whispered the familiar sweet nothings into your ears.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you.”

“I’m okay, you’re okay, we’re okay...”

“I’m here, just let it all out..”

Overwhelmed with your emotions, his sweet words only started to make you cry more.

You’ve missed him so much.

Your tears easily soaked his both his shirt and his neck, and you tried to speak only for you to choke up. Atsushi simply just started to shush you—as you would to a baby—and placed a kiss to your forehead as he continued to comfortingly stroke your hair and rub your back.

With the both of you off into your own little world, a world consisting only of the two of you, reactions and looks from the Armed Detective Agency went unnoticed.

It didn’t take long for them to realize the kind of relationship you and Atsushi had.

But what surprised them was Atsushi’s behavior.

The young adult they knew tended to be unsure of everything, including himself, and stammered whenever he was nervous.

But the young adult currently in front of them had this new aura of maturity; he didn’t hesitate to touch you or to comfort you, and for the first time they’ve seen in a while, he was sure of himself; he wasn’t nervous at all.

With the amount of comfortability Atsushi had around you, and the tender, loving care he showered you in, it was clear that you certainly were someone special to their tiger.

Your sobs slowly turned to small hiccups, and Atsushi’s face turned to one of pure tranquility and content, having his lover back in his arms.

Although having calmed down, what Atsushi said to you next made you want to start bawling all over again.

“I’m sorry I left you, and I promise I didn’t forget about you,” he whispered softly, “I thought of you every day. I still do. The thought of being able to see you again is what kept me going.”

You buried yourself further into his shoulder as you gripped his white button up in your hands.

“And thanks to the armed detective agency, I’m stronger now. I won’t let anybody hurt you, not anymore. That, I promise you.”

Actually taking a look up from you, Atsushi ended up locking eyes with Dazai, who had a gentle look on his face.

His senior only closed his eyes, tilted his head down softly, and lightly chuckled before opening his brown eyes once more, giving Atsushi a look of approval.

The gray haired teen’s eyes widened slightly as he looked around the room only to be met with similar looks of approval and gentleness from his seniors and coworkers.

He felt his eyes tear up again, but instead let out a relieved sigh as he tightened his hold on you slightly.

“Hey Atsushi...” you softly murmured.

Equally as soft, he answered, “Yes (y/n)?”

“...I love you...”

Your lover smiled before placing another kiss onto your forehead.

“I love you too (y/n)”

At last, the girl he loved was back in his arms, and the boy you loved was back within your reach.

And neither of you were ever going to let each other go again.

and it means, the joy of meeting or finding someone again after a long separation, a rediscovery

as always, reblogs and shares are appreciated! i hope you all stay safe! and just in case nobody told you they loved you today, i love you! you are enough! <3

writing belongs to me! please do not plagiarize! the reblog button is there for a reason

[iwaasfairy]

anon said: fairy i jus cried four times in a two hour tutorial class on zoom,,,, rly wanted some comfort rn so i came to your tumblr to find some hq love :( if its not too much trouble (i know uve been writing so much and answering so many asks im sorry :c) can i ask for how meian/iwa would take care of us when we’re feeling down? i hope this is cathartic for u too since u havent been feeling too good lately too <3 🌼

i didn't include your explanation bc i wasn't sure if you wanted me to but i'm so sorry you've been having such a tough day :(( it's totally okay to be upset or to cry about what happened, i probably would've too. that all sounds super overwhelming. but it's okay,, you'll be okay ♡ your teacher sounds like a lovely person so that's a good thing, and don't feel too bad about those girls bc you'll forget about them by the end of the day and so will they!

and i'm not great with fluff but i'll give it a try ( ⌯◞◟⌯)♡ hope it helps a little

iwa

you've both been having a really long day by the time you get home

usually hajime makes food himself but he's already got takeout

so when you stand in the hallway for a few seconds and take off your shoes, he instantly knows something's wrong

he quickly puts the plates aside to walk over to you, carefully opening his arms just a little in case you want a hug

and when you slump into his hold and wrap your arms tight around his waist, he'll softly rock you on your feet

"Hey baby," he breathes, pulling back a little to watch you. But you hide your face into his chest, just letting it all out as he rubs little circles on your back. "You're okay, I've got you." After a few minutes of silence he'll kiss your crown. "Here, wanna come up?"

You let him pick you up to his body and wrap your arms around his head, feeling his kisses on your neck as he walks you past the living room into the bedroom. "The food," you mumble, but he just pulls you closer.

'We can heat it later. Let's get you a nice shower before anything else. And while you do that I'll-"

"Stay with me," your voice is small when interrupting him, but it doesn't take much for him to agree when you're like this. So he only chuckles when putting you down on the toilet, and letting out a breath.

"Okay, we'll both take a shower then. You can wash my hair, would you like that?" A nod. "Good. Now come here, I'm not letting you out of my sight for tonight." Even though he's just as tired as you are, the smile he gives you is so genuine, leaning down to give you a few gentle kisses and brushing his fingers along your jaw. "We're cuddling after this."

"I love you, Hajime."

And a little blush still comes to his cheeks and ears when he looks back at you over his shoulder, turning the shower to warm. "I love you too.

meian

shugo comes home at weird hours sometimes, really early or really late if practice ran out that day

it makes you miss him a lot, definitely if you didn't get to call him at all

and when you have a tough day you usually deal with it on your own, though you know he'd love to help he just can't

you're so physically and emotionally exhausted after your day that you just toss your bags aside and collapse into bed, only thinking of a nap

it's not even dinner time yet, but you already want to curl up and sleep the rest of the day away

When you wake up it's to a few kisses to your lips, feeling pressed into the mattress like there's a weighted blanket on you. You open your eyes, meeting your huge boyfriend's pretty ones. "You're sad." It's no use trying to deny it, and a pout comes back to your face when he frowns. "Aw baby, c'mere. Why didn't you call me?"

He shoves the blankets aside to pull you onto him so you can rest on his chest, then tugging the blankets back over you. 'Hm?' he mumbles, and you rest your face into the crook of his neck. "Didn't wanna bother you when you're busy too." You feel the tears at the corners of your eyes again, his heavy hand on your head keeps you in place.

"S'not, I wanna help my pretty girl. 'S easier to deal with when ya've got your big, strong boyfriend to help ya. Unless ya think 'm too old to work and help you in the same day?" A little chuckle falls from his lips, and it makes a little laugh come through your tears too. "Gonna nap some more?"

"Mhm, but I gotta take off my make-up first."

"On it, little lady." He sets you aside in the bed, pressing a few kisses to the bridge of your nose and your forehead, before disappearing into the bathroom. When he comes back he's got all your skincare in his arms, balancing them carefully with his tongue out, and you can't help but laugh at that too. "Okay, instruct me, 'cus ya've got a lot more than I thought."

"Thank you."

"Yer welcome."

[arminty7]

𝘚𝘸𝘪𝘮𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯 𝘞𝘪𝘯𝘦

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Mermaid!Jungkook x Reader [Part 2]

Trapped in this life of expensive wine and judgemental eyes Y/N met an unusual lady who offered her a job at an aquarium a few towns away. Despite being hesitant and uncertain for the future she decided to take the offer as it was her only way out, not knowing that many dangers might come her way.

Jungkook swam his way through the small tunnel in wonder. He didn’t realise what he was ‘walking’ into as he took the entire night to explore a tunnel. He thought it might lead to you, how naive. It is only when he heard the piercing sound of drilling from the small tunnel entrance did he know what was happening, he was trapped. With that, his instincts took over.

Chapter: #2 Swimming in Wine

Words: 4181

Warnings: Mild Swearing // Fluff // Eventual Smut? Idk maybe depends // Jungkook obsessive // Evil Namjoon (im sorry guys) // It might be a little messed up. 

AN - So I know I havent updated in a very LONG time but I am now updating regularly. I have changed the pov and increased my writing ability.

© arminty7 2020 - All rights reserved.

This work shall not be copied, reproduced, translated and/or modified in any way without my permission. In a case where this might happen, legal action will be taken as it would be a criminal act under the law and breaching these terms. Upon reading my work you are acknowledging that this work is mine and that you know the consequences if this work is copied, reproduced, translated and/or modified in any way without my permission.

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You awoke abruptly as a slam of the car door next to you made you nearly jump from your seat. You sat up and looked around as Julie stepped out of the car onto the wet road. Your head feeling cloudy as you noticed you were parked in a parking lot next to a tall building in the middle of the bustling city. Your eyes then followed Julie who walked across the road towards a small bakery. You could smell the food from here as your stomach grumbled loudly. You closed your eyes again, hearing the cars go past as their tires hit the puddles on the ground. The distant honk of horns and the bus going past made you feel somewhat tranquil, wanting to stay like that forever. You were ready to go back to sleep before the sound of the car door opening made your eyes open again.

"Oh, so you're finally awake?" Julie looks towards you with a smile on her face as she ducks her head under the car roof and gets in. She closes the door firmly beside her, with a bag of pastries in her hand.

"Uh yeah I guess. How long was I asleep for?" You don't even look in her direction as you rub your eyes, feeling sleep try to invite you in once more.

"No more than a few hours, although we are just about there. We are staying at my place for a while. Just out of the city in Taelin Shore" (I made it up with the idea of "Tail", it's not a ship name). She looked at you, shaking the bag of pastries in her hand that you didn't even notice till now.

"So when do I start work?" You look at the pastries and then back at her, wanting to focus on what's important. She places the pastries on the backseat and starts the engine, before driving out of the parking lot.

"Well, you will have an orientation on Monday at the aquarium which starts at 9 am till 2 pm. It's only small but I think it's just for showing you the ropes and letting you explore the building." She continues to drive out of the city down the coast, heading for Taelin Shore.

"Wait Monday? That's only three days away. They didn't even give me an interview yet" It seemed unreal at the most, how could they have that much faith in you?

"They don't need an interview. I told you, I know the owner. He trusts my word more than anyone." She smiles, the brown locks of her hair tied back into a messy bun, something you never thought she would wear. At the dinner party, she seemed so elegantly dressed like the other woman there. It was weird to see her in casual clothes and indulging in sweet pastries.

You look at her once more in disbelief, feeling hesitant about this situation. "I barely know you. I heard that you knew my mother but forgive me if that in itself makes me even more concerned". She chuckles slightly, gripping the wheel tightly as she turns another corner. "You might barely know me, but I was around ever since you were born. I just want to help you. I love your mother, but she puts too much pressure on you."

You sighed as you looked out the window realising you reached the coast of Taelin. It seemed beautiful and serene as you drove through the town, going past, looking at the view of the ocean. You were excited but nervous. What if you don't like it here? What if it is the same as back home? A place that kills every  good part of you, forcing you to feel paranoid about everyone you meet? You didn't want to be near that. You wanted to be free. 

Your thoughts were interrupted by the car going up the hill on a small dirt path and parking next to a small beach house that was facing the ocean. "We're here, how do you like it? Nice view huh?" Julie smiles in awe as she exits the car, slamming the car door behind her. You do the same as you both look out towards the view of the vast ocean and the mountains that surround the small town.

Julie points down towards the pier urging you to look over to see a massive building next to the docks. "That's where you will be working in the next couple of days." She smiles, "don't worry, everyone's friendly. It's different here".

You look over at her in doubt, "What about you? How do I know you're different than the rest of them back at home?".

She chuckles before turning back towards you, "I got you out, didn't I?" she pats your shoulder before heading inside. She leaves you with your thoughts.

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[6:43 am]

It was early in the morning, the light from the sun started to shine in your room as you soon noticed that you - again - forgot to close the curtains. Although awake, instead of you getting up to close them, you laid there for a while. The sound of the waves crashing was distant, but you could almost feel the pressure and the weight of the water crashing onto the rocks. You imagined what it would be like to be that rock, every day having to go through the same cycle. Every morning the tide would try and crash down and attempting to break through on the rocks until it is time for the water to come back in. The water could never break the rocks, perhaps that was even more torture.

You sighed, not even understanding your own thoughts sometimes. You groan as you get up from the warm and comforting bed, heading towards the shower. You undressed and turned the shower on, watching the steam build-up in the room, covering the mirror. You preferred hot showers.

After your shower, you left to walk along the beach. Upon stepping outside the two-story house, you feel a gush of wind. The cold pierces your body as the wind flutters through your clothes. You walk down the steps of the patio and walk over to the edge of the cliff, looking down at the water that once again crashes through the rocks violently.

You weren't afraid of the ocean and had spent your whole life in the water. Although, something didn't feel right here. You watched the water down below. I looked peaceful yet restless. With every second it became more violent, the clouds grew dark quickly, and you noticed a drop of water fall onto your forehead. You sighed and looked back down the cliff before seeing a small splash in the water and something with a scaly body. But it was nothing like what you had seen at the aquarium. You felt yourself getting dizzy and started to wonder when the last time you had eaten something. You cursed under your breath for rejecting those pastries Julie got yesterday. You stumbled, backwards and forwards as your vision started to spin. The dark cloud's now covering the sky completely. You had tried to balance yourself, but you had ended up stepping forward to much, descending over the cliff and crashing down into the ocean. Your vision went black.

The water was cold, too cold. You felt the cold sinking into your skin, grasping onto your bones, coating them in ice. You didn't bother to open your eyes as you felt yourself crashing in and out of the water. You could hear the waves and thunder as you reach the surface, before getting pulled under again. Suddenly strong arms wrapped around you from behind. Your toes and the back of your thighs could feel the slimy tail that was swaying beneath the surface. You tried to look over at what has a hold of you. Although it was strong, and you could barely move your body. You could feel its cold hands enveloping around your chest and your waist as your body swayed in the current. You could feel its hot breath on your neck whispering things in your ear before you passed out from exhaustion.

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[Two days later]

Monday - 8:45 am

The morning was quick, slipping your shoes on as you try to make your way down the stairs of the beach house into the lounge room. You couldn't stop thinking about that day. The day where you

woke up on the beach and Julie insisted on calling the doctor even though you assured her everything was fine. It was surprising, to say the least, that you didn't even get hurt. There were tons of rocks as the current was nearly ripping you apart. That was before that thing showed up. It felt like death was surrounding you. Ironic really that it may have saved your life.  

"Hurry up Y/N, I told them you'd be there by 9. You're lucky we don't live far away from the Aquarium". Julie watches you run around the house as you find your bag and keys. You ignore her comments as you rush out the door towards the car, opening the passenger side and getting in.  

"Why don't you let me drive?" You groan, looking at your watch. She gets in beside you and starts the car. "Because dear Y/N, you’re impulsive and from what I heard, it took you seven times before you passed your driving test and you haven't driven since." You roll your eyes as she drives down the dirt road and onto the main road.

You look out towards the ocean, seeing the waves crash onto the rocks on the mountains, slamming on the rocks violently. Your mind wandered for a bit. You could almost feel the hot breath against your neck again, ice-cold arms wrapping around your body. The memory of that strange creature is still vivid in your mind. You didn't tell Julie, of course. She'd probably think you're crazy.

Your eyes wander towards the open sea, seeing the birds glide over the water, how free they looked. The thought of being free sounded appealing, oh how you wanted to be one of those birds, flying across the water, without a care in the world.

But even you knew that in reality, those birds still needed to fight to survive, even they sometimes had to turn against each other.

You sighed, looking towards the road as you see small fish and bakery shops already opened and full of locals. A few minutes passed as the car turned into a car park. "We're here." Julie parked the car.

"You're not coming in with me?" You looked at her pouting a little as she chuckles "Do you want me to?" Your eyebrows furrowed, quickly grab your bag and open the door.

"No" You quickly answer and slam the door, feeling as though she was mocking you a little because you didn't want to do it alone.

"You don't need her Y/N" You tell yourself. "She's just like the rest of them. Just take advantage of the situation until your good on your own. Then let her go. She's just using you"

You make your way towards the entrance, going past the two waterfalls with statues of dolphins spitting out water. The glass doors opened as you enter, and you look at your watch, it was 8:57.

You walk in following the tunnel entrance towards the reception although you couldn't help but wonder where everyone was. Wasn't it opening today? Were you mistaken? You continue towards the reception, seeing a young handsome looking man in a suit typing away on his computer. You clear your throat and the man looks over at you.

"Oh, my apologies miss. We are not open today due to a technical issue, but we will be opening tomorrow at 7 am. Do you wish to make a booking early?" The handsome man looks over at you, his broad shoulders prominent. You glanced over at his name tag labelled "Kim Seokjin".

"Uhh, no thank you. My name is Y/N, Y/N L/N. I'm here for my induction." Your words came out less confident than you would have liked as you looked down at the floor.

"Y/N!?" You flinched, hearing your name being called. You looked over as another man in a black suit walked towards you. He was tall and had blonde hair, slicked back and styled. He held out a hand to you, "Hello, my name is Kim Namjoon. Julie told me so much about you." He smiled at you, displaying his two dimples on each side of his face. Just like the receptionist, his visuals were prominent.

You shook his hand, blinking a few times before realising, "You're... my boss??" you stammered out, his firm strong hands wrapped around your tiny ones. You have to admit, he was well built and his smile was to die for. He chuckled, letting your hand go before directing you past the reception and into the food court of the aquarium. You look back towards the reception, wanting to say goodbye to the receptionist but it was too late as Namjoon led you down the hall.  

As the two of you entered the food court, the room was wide, and it looked like a massive underground restaurant with fish tanks surrounding it. You have never seen anything like it.

"So, Y/N, as you might have guessed this place is quite empty at the moment, just a small a technical issue but it hopefully will be fixed in a few days" Namjoon leads you across the room letting you take a look at everything. You suppose that this is going to be your tour.

"Ah yes, so I've heard" Namjoon smiles while continue walking as you went past an enormous tank that looked like it connected with the other tanks. You glanced at his attire, classic black suit and tie with a white shirt underneath.

Namjoon had stopped and glanced around the room. "This is the food court, although most of the time when you are working you won't be needed here." It just had occurred to you that you didn't even know what position you'd be in. All you knew was that it was a job away from your mother and paid quite a lot of money. Julie was right, you are impulsive.

"So, what am I going to be doing here?" You look over at him as he continues to walk, heading towards another room with a big smile on his face, showing his dimples.

"Well, Y/N-"

"Namjoon! There you are, we have a situation..." A man with a white coat entered the room. He had a concerned look about him but as soon as he saw you it changed into a big smile and you couldn't help but want to smile back at him.

"Hello! My name is Jung Hoseok. You must be the new girl that will be working for us?" You looked at him and couldn't help but feel special as he gave you all his attention. Namjoon looked over at you while you smiled back at Hoseok, you dont know why but you just felt so comfortable around him.

"Ah yes... I guess everyone knows about me, huh" you shyly answered, suddenly finding the urge to fiddle with your earring. It was a nervous habit. "My name is Y/N L/N. It's nice to meet you" Hoseok smiled again before Namjoon cleared his throat, regaining our attention.

"Hoseok... Did you want to speak in private?" Hoseok's smile immediately dropped and he looked at Namjoon with a more serious expression.

"Yes, of course,  Regarding our technical problem, there is some important information you need to know." Namjoon nods his head and looks over at you. "Excuse me, Miss L/N".

You watched them walk out of the food court. You wondered what the technical problem was. Even the receptionist was vague about it. You sighed and took a seat at the cafe. You sat there staring at a fish in a tank. The food court was big and round. The walls surrounding it was just glass tanks, with one in the middle of the circular room, acting as a pillar. You sat in your seat quietly, your mind started to wander back to those callous hands that feel like they never left your body. You felt an ice chill, it petrified you. It felt like you were marked by death.  

You heard Namjoon and Hoseok walk in as you quickly stood up and pushed your chair in neatly. "Everything all sorted?" You press your lips together, trying to get that thing off your mind.

Namjoon looks at you curiously before frowning, 'I'm truly sorry, I don't think I can proceed with this tour. Something very important has come up". You nod, understandingly.

"No, No, I understand. Don't worry, I'm pretty sure I can navigate my way around the place." You take a glance around.

This place is way too big...

Namjoon looked over at you. "That won't be necessary, I have organised one of the staff members to come and give you a tour, you will be a trainer just like him. He will be mentoring you. His name is-"  

"Hello Y/N". His voice was sweet. Angelic, but not innocent. A sultry like voice that sounded like a whisper of temptation. You looked over your shoulder to see an elegant looking man with light brown locks walking over to you. His style was neat as he had black-skinny jeans and a white t-shirt, following by a Chanel bag. "My name is Park Jimin," the man said.

Damn the wage must be crazy then huh...

Namjoon sighed and looked at the floor, that was the second time he had gotten interrupted. Namjoon looked over at Jimin and then at you, before stating "This is your mentor".

Jimin looks over at you cocking his head as he smiled at you. "Come on, let me show you the place! Oh yeah, and you can meet Tae! He'd love to meet you." He grabbed your hand, locking your fingers with his as he dragged you out of the food court. "Goodbye Hoseok and Namjoon! Nice meeting you!"

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You sat there next to the water on the platform that stretches over the dolphin's tank. Jimin had taught you how to feed them and the different signals you can do with your hands. When you first saw Jimin, he seemed to like this neat good-looking guy that wouldn't work at a place like this. But here, now looking at him as he is feeding the dolphins with the biggest smile on his face, his hair fluffy and eyes glued to the water, he looked like he belonged.

"Jimin-ah!" you heard someone shout. Jimin stood up quickly and ran off the platform onto the concrete towards a tall looking man, well at least taller than Jimin. "Taehyung-ah! You are 3 hours late! You know you can't always get me to cover for you. You are lucky Y/N was there when I ran into Namjoon today, he for sure would have asked me about you. You know I can't lie to him!" Jimin and Taehyung walked back on the platform and you could finally see Taehyung features.

"Hi, my name is Kim Taehyung. Nice to meet you" he bowed and smiled. His voice was low, that was the first thing you noticed about him. The second thing was his fluffy black hair and you suspected that he recently had a perm. He was soft in every way except he had this dominating presence that could be seen through his eyes. He smiled at you, his box smile making you smile.

"Hello! My name is Y/N. Quite late, are you?" You smiled, and he chuckled. "I swear this doesn't always happen." Jimin scoffed and you tried to hold in your laughter.

"Oh yeah, did you show her around yet?" Taehyung came and sat down on the platform. We joined him, watching the dolphins. Jimin looked over at you "Well we did look around a little, but we haven't been to all the off-limit areas yet".

This intrigued you, "Ooh, now I’m excited. " You spoke with enthusiasm and Taehyung and Jimin smirked at one another. Jimin looked your way "Okay so we can’t get caught there though, it's off-limits to everyone besides Namjoon and Hoseok."

You nodded, curious to see what those "off-limit areas" are. Taehyung sighed, "I don't get why it's off-limits. Those poor fishes all alone... No one to talk too..." Taehyung pretends to cry and puts his hands over his face before taking them off and smirking. You were confused about his comment.  

You look over at Taehyung. He was a character that's for sure. He seemed more carefree than Jimin. Perhaps he didn't like his job as much as Jimin liked it? You weren't one to judge though. You did, in fact, move away from home with barely any knowledge where you're going or if Julie was trustful. You were pretty carefree yourself. But thats because you feel like you have nothing to lose. 

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"Come on! Come on! Hurry up Tae." Jimin whispered loudly.

Taehyung was dawdling behind as you and Jimin were making your way downstairs in the back area of the aquarium. Towards one of the rooms  that were "off-limits". Jimin and Taehyung said they have been working here for years and they have a special key for one of the rooms down here. Apparently it came from the bartender that worked in the food court. Jimin said that the bartender had found it while cleaning and decided to keep it.

"Ah yes, the bartender... watch out for that one" Taehyung chuckled as you guys went through the door using the key. "What do you mean?" you answered, watching Jimin use the key on the door.

"Don't scare her Taehyung! It's her first day, I'm sure he will like her." Jimin sighed but smirked slightly as he opened the doors. As you walked inside you noticed the walls looked like they were made out of stone with little windows that revealed the ocean. There was a long hallway, the ground was made out of sand and as you went down the pathway you could see a moonpool of some sort that had fish in it.

"My little fishes! How have you been?" Taehyung yells out and Jimin shushes him.

"I can't believe this is down here," You say, getting closer the glowing moonpool. Taehyung walks past you, "well no one comes down here anymore. As we said, we have the key. No one has been in, so we figured we are the only ones who have a key to the place."

“But, like how is it here? Under the aquarium?” You wondered, sitting down next to the moonpool. 

“Its connected to the mountains. The aquarium is on the shore but the back of it is connected to the mountains that surround Taelin Shore and this just so happens to be here.” Jimin states, looking around it awe. 

Jimin smiled and looked over at Taehyung, "Its our little hideout but now I feel like it should be Y/N's..." Jimin smiled as he spoke, visably excited and leaned onto Taehyung. You suppose they have been friends since their childhood. You could have sensed it on them.

You gave Jimin a confused expression he looked over at you and handed you the key, "here". You looked at him and stood back. "Wait what? Why are you giving me that? isn't it yours?". Jimin shrugs and puts it in your other hand. "I was once new here as well. I know how it feels, sometimes you just want some peace and quiet." Taehyung then chips in, "It may not seem like it now but when it gets busy, it can be stressful. Besides, we haven't been in here for a while, we don't have any use for it.

You smiled, you did need this. With Julie at home and these two at work, you knew you're going to have your hands full. Just the other day, you wanted time alone... By the end of it, you fell off a cliff and nearly drowned. Perhaps this could be a place for you to be alone. Everyone needed a hideout, right?

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It was the end of the day and Jimin and Taehyung were finished giving you their tour. You were surprised that you felt so comfortable around them. Julie was right, the people here are different.

You stood outside of the Aquarium hugging and saying goodbye to both Jimin and Taehyung as they walked towards their cars to go home. You weren't planning to stay for this long, truth is your orientation ended hours ago. You just wanted to spend more time with them.

You walked over to the pillar at the steps, waiting for Julie to come to pick you up. You sat down on the steps quietly before hearing someone raise their voice as they were heading up the steps. You hid behind the pillar, sittiing there silently. Thankfully, they didn't see you.

You heard Hoseok's voice "You don't understand! We got him! We got him, you hear me? This is a breakthrough of the century! Do you know what we could do now that we have him? The possibilities are endless. This creature is-"

You heard someone interrupt. It sounded like Namjoon, "This creature is the only thing we have going for us right now so would you be so kind to stay quiet! I know you're excited, but we can't let anyone know about this, he's dangerous."

They both went inside. Leaving you to your thoughts.

Honk Honk

"Come on Y/N, It's late!" Julie yelled out from the car. You got up and grabbed your bag before running over to the car.

"I'm coming!"

Tags - @mjlock

AN: Tell me if you like it! 

- Minty ⚘

[goldpilot22]

i want to look at comforting stuff but i can't find any of it and i think my phone deleted the folder sometime since i last backed it up but the backups are both on the other side of my bedroom and it's 1 am and pitch dark and im not completely sure if i can walk right now

[sup-hoes-its-me]

Mission (Bokuto x reader)

A/N: soooo ive been a depressed bitch and havent updated in months, sorry about that... I didnt even edit this, so beware typos ahead. Disabled reader x bokuto.

side note-if you guys think this is shit, just message me so i can delete it ✌✌

word count: 4435

Y/N sat in the gym on the sidelines, watching the team practice. Personally, she would never play. She was in a wheelchair, most likely for life. She hated it. She couldn’t play the game anymore. 

Bokuto tried getting her to help him toss the ball, but she was too embarrassed to roll over and attempt setting. Whenever Bokuto asked her to play, Akaashi would whack him on the back of the head and tell her she could just watch if she wanted.

Akaashi understood her. He watched out for her, and she really appreciated that. But Bokuto was just too much fun.

Those two, Bokuto and Y/N, have been friends for a long time. She met him when she was five, having moved into the city, directly in the house beside his. Their parents set up dozens and dozens of playdates until they eventually began walking to school and eating lunch together and talking all the time.

Then, there was an accident and suddenly, she couldn't play anymore. Bokuto was sad she couldn't play with them. He asked her many times. But, she always said no, and she wanted to cry each time.

At the same time, Bokuto always defended her, keeping other people, ones that could be rude to her for her disability, off her back. He also spent a lot of time making her laugh like crazy on the sidelines. He would send her funny looks and stick out his tongue whenever any teammate spiked past him.

To this day, he made her so happy.

“Y/N! Y/N! Did you see that?!” he asked her excitedly, running over to her with the biggest smile on his face.

With a nod, a silly grin grew on her face. “Yeah. You did awesome as always, Bokuto-kun,” she praised him, which sent him into a sort of euphoric stage. He got so hyper. No one ever praised him, especially not Akaashi. Yet, she always did.

“I’m gonna go play again. I'll do even better this time, for you!” he exclaimed before turning on his heel and rushing back onto the court. He was the captain, so he could run on and off the court as he pleased. At first, his team got annoyed with him for it, for running to that girl all the time. After a while, they accepted it, believing that there was nothing that could stop him.

That was one more thing they admired about their ace and captain. He was incredibly loyal to his best friend, Y/N. In a decade of knowing each other, the number of fights they had could be counted on one hand. He walked her home, ate lunch with her everyday, sat beside her in nearly every class, and took her to every practice and game they had.

He didn't care that she was in a wheelchair. He never even thought about it. While other people brought it up, he smiled proudly at his strong, brave best friend. He’d seriously kick some ass if anyone harassed her, too.

And she watched all the games and practices too. She always cheered him on and praised him whenever he did well. If she did that, he worked even harder and got  better. She loved going home with him, listening to him talk and laugh and tell the stupidest jokes you’ve ever heard.

She was so shy, but he brought out the best in her. He really, really did.

Practice came to a close after another hour. She made sure her bag was hung on one of the handles and her keys were in her pocket. Bokuto took a shower and got all his things together before he approached her, bouncing on his feet happily.

“Y/N, do you wanna get ice cream with Kuroo tonight?”

She grinned, nodding excitedly. She loved Kuroo too. He was funny and snarky, but equally as foolish as Bokuto whenever they got together. “Yeah! Just let me text my mom, okay?”

Quickly, she texted her mom to tell her she was going out for a little while with Bokuto. A minute later, her phone chimed. Her mother sent her a smiley face and a message saying, ‘be back by ten.’

Her mom was always nervous about her going out by herself, which was understandable. She trusted Bokuto though, and occasionally, she even let Kuroo take Y/N out to games. She’d known them for so long, it made her comfortable knowing her daughter was in good hands.

She pocketed her phone again. “She said it was okay. Let's go,” she cheered. He hung his book bag on the handle of her wheelchair before turning her around and pushing her toward the door.

“Bye, L/N-senpai!” Onaga called to her. She eagerly waved to him. A chorus of goodbyes rang out to her as she left. Everyone on the team liked her, genuinely. If they didn't, Bokuto would be furious. Fortunately, that never happened.

“Y/N, have you seen any good movies lately?”

“Not really.”

He nodded, a little hum in the back of his throat in agreement. “Yeah, there really isn't anything out right now, is there?” He always asked her about movies because she watched them all the time, mostly in class while she was on her phone...she wasn't exactly the best student.

She added, “But, I saw a movie, and the main character reminded me of you.”

“Really?!”

“Yeah. He was super funny and really loud, and his hair stuck up just like yours.”

“Was he handsome?”

“Yep.”

“Hey! Hey! Hey! That's even better, Y/N!”

She looked down at her hands in her lap, thinking of what to say next. She felt so awkward calling him handsome, just wanting to change the topic before he could say anything else.

“Training camp is coming up, right? At Nekoma?”

“Yep, yep. Next week.” He pushed her up on the sidewalk of the street, only about seven blocks away from the ice cream place they always went to. “Do you want to come and watch me practice?”

“Of course I do!”

“Awesome!”

She clasped her hands together and smiled shyly, her eyes trailing to her lap. “And I’ll get to meet everyone.”

He pouted, feverishly shaking his head. “No! All those guys will like you too much! They’ll take you away from me! Gah!” he cried, his mood dropping pathetically in a moment.

Comfortingly, she placed a soft hand on his and shook her head subtly. “Are you kidding? You’re the bestest friend in the entire world. None of those guys could ever replace you,” she told him, giving his hand a gentle pat.

“Yeah, but you always get so excited when we hang out with Kuroo…” he continued to mope despite her assurance.

She only rolled her eyes. “That's because Kuroo is a good friend. I don't have that many friends, you know?”

“Why do you need a lot of friends when you have me?”

“You are definitely a handful. Enough for me,” she mumbled, turning back around in her seat. She could see the familiar sign of the cute little ice cream parlor. It wasn't anything like some ice cream bars from the convenience store, it was thick creamy goodness covered in whatever toppings she wanted. Sometimes, she worried about getting chubby when she went there too often.

Still, no matter what she said, Bokuto was irked. Truthfully, he worried that Kuroo would steal Y/N away from him. He was taller and handsome and funny and really cool sometimes. Cooler than him…

“You okay, Bokuto-kun?”

He jumped out his thoughts at the sound of her sweet voice. “Yeah. Yep, I'm totally good.” That sounded fake as hell, but okay.

She pushed open the door to the store with her arm and they entered. It was cold in there, but really pleasant. It smelled like a wonderland of sweets, her favorite guilty pleasure. The cashier, a sweet young man, called to her and Bokuto over the counter.

“Hey, L/N-san, Bokuto-san!” He waved to them both.

“Hi, Kiku! We're just waiting for Kuroo.”

“Okay then. Just tell me when you're ready!”

Just then, the door flew open and the captain entered, his hair even messier from the wind outside. Y/N giggled, waving at him shyly. “You look so weird, Kuroo!” she confessed when he approached.

His brows furrowed, and he sent her a judging look. Nevertheless, he still leaned down for his hug. He always hugged her, claiming he found her positively adorable. “L/N, its been a while.”

“Kuroo, we just saw you last Wednesday,” she whined. He stepped back, and grinned down at her.

“Sup, Brokuto,” he nodded to his friend who waved back, muttering out a greeting. He didn't know why but, he was burning with jealousy. Why did Kuroo have to hug her all the time? And why was she always giggling around him? It frustrated him to no end.

She was only supposed to hug him and smile when he told jokes, and giggle like some stupid schoolgirl when he did something cute. He kept hanging out with Kuroo, but it still irritated him anyway.

“Bokuto, are you sure you're okay?” she asked him, concern lacing her words. Her soft fingers once again rested upon his own, and it knocked him from his jealous thoughts.

He nodded, pushing her over to the counter where Kuroo was already getting his chocolate ice cream, like he got every time. He paid for the cup, knowing the exact change by now. Kiku then looked down at Y/N.

Same thing as always. “Vanilla with cherries, please.”

“And you, Bokuto?”

He thought for a second, not that it really mattered. “Uh, I'll just have the same thing,” he replied simply. There was a small hum of affirmation as the boy scooped up two cups of ice cream and spooned on the candy cherries.

Bokuto pulled out six hundred yen, handing it to Kiku behind the counter. Meanwhile, Y/N grabbed the ice cream from the counter, one cup in her right hand and the other in her left.

They always sat at the small table by the window, two seats across from each other and a big space in the middle for Y/N to sit at. Kuroo was already there, munching on his ice cream.

“Kuroo, you should have seen Bokuto-kun today! He was so amazing. He didn't mess up once, and he did this amazing quick set with Akaashi!” she explained, proceeding to spoon ice cream into her mouth. She sent a happy smile to Bokuto, causing him to grin proudly. He was pretty awesome if his little Y/N thought so.

“As good as me though?” Kuroo joked.

“Aw, Kuroo, you know I can't answer that. You both are so good!”

Why couldn't she answer that? Bokuto was her best friend in the entire world. She always told him he was the best ace in the whole prefecture. Kuroo wasn't even an ace. So why couldn't she just say he was better?

Then again, she always did like Kuroo more than him. She thought he was so cool…

Kuroo piped up, just as Bokuto was about to try and tell a joke. His smile was quick to dissolve though.“Hey, Y/N, can I have a cherry?” he asked, eyeing her cup.

She shrugged and lifted out one of the vibrantly red cherries by the stem. She held it out for him to take, only he just leaned forward and bit off the cherry right off the stem between her finger tips. A smirk grew on his lips as he watched her cheeks turn a bright red, and her to quickly look down at her ice cream.

That was so weird.

It made Bokuto furious.

He stood up abruptly, and all eyes rose to his figure. He tried playing it off though. “I almost forgot. Kuroo, I have to talk to you about...volleyball stuff. Let's go outside.”

“But-”

“Sorry, Y/N-chan. This is some serious business. We’ll be back in a minute, I promise,” he told her, a single hand tapping her on the head. She rolled her eyes and nodded at his gesture.

Bokuto then forcibly yanked Kuroo outside with him, making sure the door was shut before totally losing his cool. “Dude, what the hell? Stop flirting with her.”

Kuroo sighed, shaking his head. “Come on, Bro. You know I'm only joking around.” His words meant absolutely nothing to Bokuto, who was angry, but mainly just dejected and sad.

He didn't understand why this was all happening. Why his friend was flirting with his crush. Why his childhood friend, best friend, and future girlfriend, was blushing and giggling around his other friend. He didn't like any of it, and his heart hurt.

“No! I really, really like her! She's my soulmate! If you keep doing that kinda stuff, she's gonna like you instead!” he exclaimed, his fists releasing at his sides. He felt terrible, like his life was being stolen from him, life being Y/N. He might even cry.

Kuroo sighed, shaking his head once again. He was being jealous for no reason at all. If only he would listen and quit being so ignorant. “She'd be nuts if she liked me when she already has you.”

“Huh?”

“You're the only guy ever who has loved her through everything. You take care of her. You push her around all day, and bring her to all your games, and you buy her ice cream all the damn time. You walk her home, you make her laugh, and you kick ass whenever someone makes fun of her,” Kuroo explained. “She’s crazy if she doesn't love you.”

He shuffled, feeling let down still. “She only sees me as her best friend.”

Kuroo placed his hands on the guys shoulder firmly. He looked at him completely seriously and practically commanded, “Well, you have to change that! Make her fall in love with you!”

“I can do that?!”

“Hell yeah, bro!” he cheered. “Mission: Make L/N Y/N fall in love with you.” That's what they called it. They decided that the plan would commence on Monday. By now, Bokuto was desperate; he needed Y/N to love him back because he can't imagine a day in his life without seeing her.

But he failed to realize one thing. Their plan was completely pointless.

________________________

Monday. The day he would make Y/N fall in love with him. He woke up that morning and brushed his hair, making sure it looked really good, slick and charming. He chewed a ton of gum, just to make sure his breath stayed minty even after brushing his teeth. He even went so far as wearing the uniform correctly with the tie and all. Normally, he only wore the shirt and blazer.

He left the house with a smile on his face and walked up the sidewalk to her door. He knocked a couple times until her mother opened the door. “Koutarou-kun, you're early today,” she hummed. “You look quite handsome today, too. Did you do something with your hair?”

“Yep! Thank you, L/N-san,” he said with a nod of his head. He was relieved to hear her say he looked good. He needed to look his best for Y/N.

Behind her mother, the girl wheeled over with her bag in her lap. She looked adorable, as always. Her hair was perfect, and her face was bashful with those red cheeks and cute smile. She was an angel, and he knew that no matter how hard he tried, he would never be as attractive as her.

“Bye, you two. Have a good day at school.” her mother said, moving out of the way so Y/N could roll outside. Bokuto waved to the woman as she shut the door. From there, he took the handles of her chair and started down the ramp.

When they were on the sidewalk, her voice made him pause. “Bokuto, come here,” she told him, waving for him to stand in front of her. She scanned his figure with scrutiny, noticing every little detail that was off about him that morning.

He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. “What-”

“You look so weird today. Why’d you do that to your hair?” she asked, tilting her head to the side, puzzled. It didn't look good in her eyes, only strange and uncomfortable.

He flushed, not expecting those words from her. He thought she would be impressed. “Get down here.” He leaned down and immediately felt her hands running through his hair. She hummed as she did so, making sure that all the spikes were back in order. Then, when she was done with that, her hands went to his tie. She slipped it from his neck. “Now you look like the Bokuto I love,” she laughed with a smile on her perfect lips.

His cheeks flared, and he hurried back behind her, pushing her along. He tried his best to hide his fluster, but she was too much for him to handle. She said she loved him, sure, it wasn't anything romantic, only friendly, but she still said it. His heart soared in his chest, and he felt like he could fly.

Wait...he was supposed to be making her feel that way. His plan was already failing. He would have to step up his game.

Swiftly, despite his nerves, he swooped down and pressed a kiss to her cheek. It lingered for only half a second before he pulled away. His cheeks were even brighter now, whereas hers failed to change color at all. Was she not embarrassed at all? He just kissed her and she didn't care.

Why?!

“Gosh, that's new,” she giggled, pressing her fingertips to her cheek. “What was that for?”

“Because you're so cute.” Beautiful. Funny. Adorable. Sweet. Kind. Brave. Perfect. He would list all those things and even more, if only he wasn’t such a coward.

He, at least, expected a reaction to that but she only smiled and shook her head. “You’re too much, Bokuto.” Not a blush, not a shake in her voice, nothing.

He was failing, dammit.

The walk to school was short, mostly because he was thinking of ways to woe Y/N. There were so many thoughts in his head that he thought could work, but this girl was unfazed and he didn't know if he even had a chance of getting a reaction, much less evoking love.

Classes went by quickly as well, mostly because he couldn't focus at all. Multiple times, he was scolded by his teachers for not doing his work. And when he took her to practice, he couldn't even say anything. He just pouted and dragged his feet.

She wanted to ask him what was wrong, but she knew he wouldn't tell her the truth. Something about him was just so off today.

And then she sat on the sidelines, watching everyone play. She said nothing, she couldn't. Bokuto kept messing up. He hit the ball into the net four times, and he kept spiking the ball out of the box. He wasn't his normal self, and it was hurting the team today.

Eventually, he shouted, voice pained and anguished, “Don't pass to me anymore! I’m a terrible ace!” His head dropped and he walked off the court, and called for a five minute break. Then, he went to sulk in the corner.

Akaashi walked over to Y/N, who was sitting on the side biting at her nails nervously. She’d never seen Bokuto mess up this badly. It was making her anxious. Something must have happened to him to make him this upset. It was even more concerning that he wouldn't tell her what was wrong. He always vented to her.

The boy looked down at her boredly. “What’s wrong with him?”

“I don't know! Ever since this morning, he’s been upset, but he won't tell me!” she cried, dramatically pressing her face into her hands. “I’m so worried about him!”

“Hmm, that's strange,” Akaashi muttered. He sent a look to the captain, who was still sulking, but this time, he was sneakily staring at his two friends. He tried to hide it by keeping his head down, but it was obvious his eyes were glued on them.

She mumbled, oblivious to his gaze, “I don't know what to do.”

“Yell at him. Say something to make him feel better. You've been pretty quiet all practice, you know.” He placed a hand on her shoulder with a small pat.

She lifted her head, mustering up some courage and her voice. He was right. Her encouragement always brought him out of his dejection mode. “Kou-kun! You can do it! You're the best ace in the whole world!” she yelled to him. “I believe in you!”

Immediately, he perked up. His hair seemed like it spiked up higher with his happiness. It was so cute. His cheeks turned red, and he turned around, approaching the court.

Akaashi knew what was going on. He didn't say anything, but he did send her a quiet, “good job” under his breath. Damn, those two, so in love with each other it made him want to throw up.  

The practice continued after that, and just as she said, he did so much better. All his spikes were amazing. He was back in the game. Her heart beat faster, excited that her simply words could make him feel so much better.

When he performed a particularly strong and amazing spike, he screamed. He ran across the court to Y/N, grabbing her hands tightly and shaking them. His expression was begging for praise, and she would give him some...right after he released her hands. “Bokuto, your hands are sweaty.”

The smile on his face faltered. Damn, rejected once again.

“Are you okay? You’ve been acting weird all day…”

“No! I’m not okay!” he shouted, almost theatrically. He turned his head, his eyes shut and his cheeks puffed out in a strong pout. She raised a hand to touch his arm, but he only stepped away, huffing.

She frowned, biting her lip. Was he upset this whole time because of her? She didn't think she'd done anything wrong, but with Bokuto, it could be one of the littlest things to set him off. It made her so incredibly sad.

She asked tentatively, her words just barely a whisper. “What’s wrong?”

He said nothing though. He only ducked his head and crossed his arms over his chest.

“Fine! Don’t tell me! Talk to stupid Akaashi instead!” she yelled him, turning her head away from him as well, arms crossed and cheeks in a pout. Akaashi, in the distance, sighed. He wasn't even offended, just fucking exhausted. This entire argument was ridiculous.

Bokuto wanted to maintain the silent treatment, but he couldn't. He felt like his mouth was gonna burst open and his mind was going to explode with all the self-deprecating things bouncing around in there.

“Why do you like Kuroo more than me?!” he questioned, sending her a glare. “What makes him so special that you have a crush on him?” He said it. He finally said it.

So much for that plan. It was out the window and burning now.

Why the hell had he come to that conclusion? In no way, ever, would she like Kuroo. If that was what Bokuto was upset about all day, then he was a complete dumbass. “I don't have a crush on Kuroo, Bokuto! Why the hell would you think that?”

“Because you always hug him and laugh at his jokes and flirt with him and giggle and do all that stuff when he's around!”

“You dumbass, I do those same things around you too. I’d never let Kuroo kiss me, you know? I wouldn't fix his hair if he changed it, because I don't care about him or how he looks. You know who I care about?” She looked right at him as if challenging him to say anything other than the right answer. “You. I thought that was obvious!”

“Well, I care about you a lot more, Y/N. You're my favorite person ever, and I don't want anybody taking you away from me,” he exclaimed. “Not Kuroo, not Akaashi, no one!”

“No one's ever gonna do that, Bokuto. I told you that. You're all I need!”

“Why don't you love me then?!” he blurted out without thinking. “I love you so much, and I thought you knew. How did you not notice, Y/N? How can you not love me back?” That was embarrassing, but he couldn't go back on it now. Maybe he just ruined everything...He didn't know.

But he sure did feel like a total disaster.

She gaped at him. He was always up front, but he never said something like that. Was that why he kissed her this morning? Did he fix his hair and uniform just for her? Butterflies fluttered in her stomach at the thought.

She loved Bokuto. Everyone on the planet knew she loved him, just not him.

Stupid.

“Come here, you crazy birdbrain,” she ordered, waving him closer. He was so tall, so tall that she hated the difference. But when he leaned down, she could reach him just fine. Gently, she placed both her cold hands on his cheeks before yanking him against her. For such a small girl, she was strong.

Her lips smashed to his. She kissed him with her eyes squeezed shut and her lips pressed together. It was so awkward and clumsy, since it was her first kiss after all.

His eyes remained open, wide and shocked. Y/N was kissing him. His soulmate was finally kissing him. He felt like he was in a dream. He placed his hands on the arm rests of her chair to keep himself steady. Suddenly, his legs felt so shaky he might fall over.

She pulled away and just stared at him. “I love you, stupid,” she told him firmly. His shocked open mouthed gap quickly turned into a wild, ecstatic grin. He jumped back, throwing both his fists in the air, falling to his knees, and proceeding to screech.

Y/N stifled her laughter with her hand. He was just too cute. Her eyes scanned the room, seeing all the members of the team watching in amusement. Everyone knew they would get together one of these days.

Even Kuroo.

[sydnee-kom-spacekru]

Kiss Me, Dumbass (Richard Harmon x Fem!Reader Part 6)

Warnings:

>>

You had borrowed some of Jessica's pants, and wore one of his hoodies, because her shirts didn't fit right. "Thanks for letting me borrow this." You smile slightly, and take a deep breath. The hoodie smelled like outside and his cologne.

He nodded. You were in the passenger seat of his car, on the way to Subway. Your hair was still a little wet, he allowed you to use his shower so that your hair wouldn't get dry. "Hey, did you hear me?" He tapped on your shoulder.

You snapped back into focus. "No, I'm sorry."

"That's fine. Subway's closed, you wanna go to a restaurant?" He glances over at you, pulling out of the parking lot.

"Is that your way of asking me on a date, Richard?" You smirked at him. You didn't know when, or why, you were being so nice to each other today. But you were enjoying it.

"What?" He scoffed. You thought he was playing it up a bit, but maybe he wasn't, who were you to know? "No, we're friends, and I take my friends to nice restaurants." He smacked you on the arm playfully.

"Oh so now we're friends? We'll be screwing each other by tomorrow at the rate we're going." You snorted.

"What d'you mean?" His eyebrows pulled together, glancing at you nervously. You brushed it off.

"It's nothing, I just meant that we've never been able to even hold a simple conversation, much less spend the day together." You tried to laugh it off, and you wished that you hadn't said anything.

"Oh." Was all he said. He pulled into the packed parking lot of an enormous restaurant whose name you couldn't pronounce.

"This is somewhere you take your completely platonic friends?" You whispered in awe.

"It is when their birthday is next week." You look over at him in surprise. "How could you possibly know that? I havent told anyone except for Lu." Realization settles and you sigh. She must have told him.

"You know, Richard, if you're doing this for Luisa's sake, don't. Okay?" You shook your head and unbuckled your seat belt.

He grabbed your arm gently, stopping you from getting out just yet. "I'm not doing this for anyone except for you. And Luisa didn't tell me, you said it in an interview a couple months ago, and for some reason it stuck." You smile at him, not knowing what to say.

"Come on, I want spaghetti."

"Y/n. Wait one second." His hand grabbed yours, and you turn back towards him, shutting the door. The air seemed to get thicker as you glanced down at his lips.

"Yeah?" You clear your throat when you catch yourself staring. He brings his hand up to you cheek, hesitates, then brushes your hair out of the way. "There, sorry, you had a piece of hair that was sticking to your cheek." You nod, trying to catch your breath, he was closer to you now, only about six inches away, and you caught yourself dragging your eyes down his face, trailing to his jaw, then his neck. You blink, pulling your hand away from his.

You open the door of his car, and step out. You walk around to join Richard, not saying anything. You walked into the nice restaurant, and waited for the young lady to seat you.

You were sat in the back of the restaurant, in a two seat table. "This is wonderful, thank you." You admired the art work hanging on the wall, when you felt someone staring at you. "Why are you staring?"

"To quote Augustus Waters, 'Because you're beautiful.'" He smiled at you. A young waiter, a man of around twenty-four, came up to your table.

"What can I get the happy couple today?" You turned a light pink.

"Oh- We aren't a couple." You corrected him, and Richard looked almost disappointed. You felt terrifically under dressed, in a hoodie and jeans.

"I apologize, what can we get you to drink?" He smiled a little at you.

"I'll take a sweet tea, please." You don't hear what Richard ordered, the waiter was quite handsome, though he couldn't compare to the man in front of you. You read his name tag, Eliott.

"Alright, I will be back soon." He left with a wink towards you, and Richard seemed to tense.

"Hey, what's wrong?" You put a hand over his, and he looks uo, his expression softening.

"Nothing." He gave you a half smile

[ahtohallan-calling]

chapter 5 of don’t read the last page is here!

[kristanna / m / multichap / modern au with actress!anna and vetstudent!kristoff]

He’d put the phone down on the counter while he made breakfast, but now that his hands were free again he still didn’t pick it up; after their initial awkward phone call, they’d started FaceTiming instead, and as much as he loved seeing her face, he was really glad she couldn’t see his right now.

“And I was soo confused, so I started telling her, like, ‘Seriously, Honey, he’s got this amazing blond hair that you just like, want to touch all the time and these big brown eyes and little freckles and plus I’m pretty sure he’s kind of ripped and I—‘ Kristoff, I heard the microwave go off already. Are you hiding from me?”

“No,” he muttered, his face turning even redder.

chapter 5

day 1

Sven was just stumbling into the kitchen when Kristoff came in. He frowned, narrowing his eyes suspiciously.

“You look really happy for someone who just dropped off their girlfriend at the airport for a six-week trip,” he said, pouring a glass of chocolate milk. 

“Not my girlfriend.”

“Not the important part of that sentence.”

Kristoff snagged the bottle and poured himself a cup. “This is mine, by the way, so you owe me.”

“Fine, I’ll buy toilet paper l-- no, I know you, Bjorgman, you’re trying to distract me.”

Sven narrowed his eyes further, fixing Kristoff with a hard stare. He tried to look as innocent as possible as he went to rummage through the fridge, but then he remembered the way Anna had clung to him, the feel of her little hands in his hair, the press of her lips against--

“Oh my god! You kissed her!”

Kristoff stood, not bothering to hide his smile anymore. “Well, technically, she kissed me.”

“I fucking called it, man, I knew you wouldn’t be able to hold off that much longer.”

“We really did try.”

“You didn’t even make it a week, my guy,” Sven said amiably, meandering into the living room. “You tried harder at Mario Kart the other night. Which, by the way, I know you lost on purpose so Anna could win.”

Kristoff considered arguing, but then his phone lit up with a text from Anna, so instead he grinned and walked away to the sound of Sven sighing dramatically. “I heard that buzz! I know it’s her! Jesus, I’d say get a room, but--”

Kristoff didn’t hear the rest as he shut his bedroom door.

kris!! theres wifi i can text you

Im in first class look 

..

That’s crazy

They gave you champagne this early in the morning?

..

supposed to be for mimosas

but it’s like 5 o clock somewhere

specifically romania so

..

That jet lag is going to be rough.

How long is your flight?

..

10 hrs to london then 3 to bucharest💀

but i think my seat turns into a bed so ill try to sleep

theres sooooo many movies tho!

omg theyre bringing more snacks….i feel like a movie star already

..

You kind of are.

..

havent made the movie yet!!

oh the director is here he wants to talk ttyl

..

:)

---

day 4

For some reason, her hands were shaking as they hovered over the green button. “Just do it, Anna,” she muttered to herself. “It’s just Kristoff. He told you to call.”

Thanks to the time difference and long flights, it had taken most of two days to even get here, and on her first full day in Romania she’d been so overwhelmed with the film set and meeting her co-star Adam and talking to the directors and producers and costumers and cameramen that she’d completely crashed the moment she’d gotten back to her hotel room. She’d woken up in the middle of the night and sent Kristoff a quick text apologizing for not calling; he’d responded almost immediately, reassuring her that it was fine and to just call him the next day. At a reasonable hour, he’d made sure to add, not at 2 A.M. Go back to sleep.

She had, and then she’d nearly missed her alarm and hadn’t had time to call him in the morning, and then she’d been filming her first scene and been so overwhelmed by all of that that now it was nearly six o’clock, and it was the first time she’d gotten to look at her phone all day.

He’d texted her once at around 9 A.M. her time. Good luck today! You’ll kill it. Her heart had done a funny little flip at the message, simple as it was; every time she thought of Kristoff, it didn’t feel quite real, like it was just a daydream she would wake up from, but here it was, concrete proof that even literally halfway around the world-- more than halfway, actually-- he was still thinking of her, still caring about her.

The remembrance of that was what finally gave her the courage to hit call. She felt too nervous to FaceTime him, especially considering she was already in sweatpants and halfway through eating a bowl of pasta on her bed. He picked up on the third ring, sounding breathless for some reason.

“Hey! Anna! How are you?”

“I’m, um, I’m good! How are you? You sound kind of...out of breath?”

“Oh, yeah, you caught me at the gym, so I--”

“Oh! I’m so sorry, let me hang up and--”

“No, don’t! I’m almost done, just--”

There was a quick beep in the background, and a whirring noise she hadn’t noticed until now stopped. “Okay, sorry, we’re good.”

She couldn’t help but imagine what he looked like right now, with his hair hanging in his eyes and sweat dripping down his very well-muscled--

“Anna? You there?”

He’d just asked her something, but she’d been too busy daydreaming to catch it. Maybe it really was for the best she hadn’t gone for FaceTime; she probably would have been struck speechless at the sight of him. “Sorry, I was just-- sorry. Um. What did you say?”

He laughed softly. “I asked how your first day of filming went.”

“Oh! It was good, really good, actually. We filmed that scene I auditioned with, actually. They changed the bit about the cowboy boots.”

“Thank god. I don’t know anything about movies, but I know that was awful.”

“Oh, yeah, Adam-- that’s who’s playing Jesse-- he said they’d have to double his paycheck if they wanted him to say shit like that, and then we kind of improv-ed something else and it went really well.”

“That’s awesome!”

Anna felt herself blushing, just barely, at the sound of the genuine pride in his voice. “It was, um, it was nothing, really.”

“So how’s all of it going? Are the...um...honestly, I don’t know who all is involved in making movies. But are the other people nice?”

“Yeah! I really like the girl who does my hair and makeup, her name’s Honey. Isn’t that cute?”

Kristoff laughed; she could hear him starting the car in the background. Anna bit her lip. “Oh-- did you get to shower?”

“I will at home, don’t worry. Anyway--”

“You need to focus on driving? Yeah, I totally get it, seriously. Bye!”

She hit the red button and quickly dropped her phone. Her heart had been pounding the whole time; god, she was really out of practice with this whole thing. Embarrassment swept over her, and she buried her face in her knees; how the hell was this going to work when she was too self-conscious to talk to him for more than five minutes? God, she’d be lucky if he ever bothered to call her again after this.

To her surprise, the phone buzzed only a moment later. She debated picking it up for a long moment, then decided to go ahead and rip the bandaid off and snatched it up.

Just FYI, I was feeling really nervous, too. Want me to call you back after I get home and shower?

For some reason, tears started to fill her eyes as she typed a response. 

yes please :)

She showered, too, taking her time as she let the hot water work its magic on the tension in her shoulders, drawing in slow, deep breaths to steady herself. It wasn’t that every guy she’d ever dated had been bad, per se, just that it had been quite a long time since she’d been with someone who made her feel this nervous and excited and terrified and joyful all at once-- actually, now that she thought about it, she didn’t know if she’d ever liked someone else this much right off the bat. Since coming to L.A. almost two years ago, she’d had a string of bad luck with men, and it was strange readjusting to the notion that one would want to talk to her as much as she wanted to talk to him, that he actually wanted to hear about her day, that he saw right through all her embarrassing little defense mechanisms and somehow knew just what to say to make her feel better. Of course they knew each other, but this was something different, something more, as if she didn’t even have to say something for him to understand.

Her phone buzzed again ten minutes after she got out of the shower; with a smile, she picked it up.

“Hey, Kris.”

“Hey, Anna.”

“Ready to try again?”

“With you? Always.”

---

day 9

“So I was telling her, like, ‘I wish I had a recent picture of him to show you because he’s like, super super hot.’ And she kind of made this face and was like ‘that won’t make a difference.’”

He’d put the phone down on the counter while he made breakfast, but now that his hands were free again he still didn’t pick it up; after their initial awkward phone call, they’d started FaceTiming instead, and as much as he loved seeing her face, he was really glad she couldn’t see his right now. 

“And I was soo confused, so I started telling her, like, ‘Seriously, Honey, he’s got this amazing blond hair that you just like, want to touch all the time and these big brown eyes and little freckles and plus I’m pretty sure he’s kind of ripped and I—‘ Kristoff, I heard the microwave go off already. Are you hiding from me?”

“No,” he muttered, his face turning even redder. 

Anna giggled. “Then show me your face.”

He did so reluctantly; to his surprise, she didn’t laugh. “Kris, you know you are, like, super handsome, right? Seriously.”

“I’m, um, I’m just gonna—“

“I mean it. Like I get why you’re feeling shy about it and stuff but just know that, okay?”

He only nodded, feeling a little better, although his face was still heated. Anna, knowing when to leave well enough alone, smiled at him and continued her story. “Anyway, I told her all that and she just started laughing, and finally when I was done she was like ‘Anna, I’m gay’. And so then I showed her a picture of my sister, and I’m just saying, when we’re back in LA, we’re definitely doing a double date.”

—-

day 15

She didn’t know why she felt so nervous about telling him about it. She’d already texted him that morning telling him what scenes they were filming, and it wasn’t like it had meant anything; it was just part of the movie, and Adam was married anyway— but then again, it wasn’t that part that had really been bothering her. She still wasn’t sure until she was explaining it all to Kristoff, forcing herself to maintain eye contact as she held up her phone inside the blanket nest she’d constructed on her bed. 

“And like, he and I are good friends now, so that at least made it easier. And we were all in character and stuff, so, you know, it felt right, and then they started the fake snow going and we just did it, you know?”

“Uh-huh,” Kristoff said, his voice neutral. 

“That like— this doesn’t bother you, right?” she asked quickly. “Because seriously, it didn’t mean—“

“Anna, I know. This is literally your job, I’m not jealous or anything. But please tell me if I ever make you feel like I’m mad or something, because I’m seriously not.”

She let out the breath she’d been holding. “I— I know. I just...wanted to make sure. Because it still, like...still felt weird to me, you know? And I can’t figure out why.”

He nodded thoughtfully. “Have you done this before? Like, stage kissing and stuff?”

“Oh, yeah, lots of times. But this time felt kind of different. I just don’t know why.”

He considered it for a moment, looking so thoughtful she couldn’t help but smile, feeling a little flutter in her chest at the thought that he really and truly cared about helping her figure this out. “Enough about me, though, tell me about that crazy to-go order you texted me about. Did you end up getting to see the person who’d ordered it?”

They talked for so long Anna lost track of time, until she yawned so widely Kristoff stopped talking mid-sentence. 

“Anna, what time is it there?”

“Um...close to eleven?”

“What time did you get up this morning?”

“...four.”

He laughed softly. “Get some sleep. I’ll talk to you again tomorrow morning, okay?”

She wanted to argue, but honestly she’d been fighting to keep her eyes open for the last half hour. “Night, Kris.”

“Night, Anna. Sweet dreams.”

He said that every night, but the way he’d smiled tonight— she was thinking about it until long after she’d hung up her phone and closed her eyes. Then, suddenly, she sat upright and snatched it up again, typing furiously. 

figured it out...before, there’s never been someone i ACTUALLY wanted to kiss instead 

..

:)

I wish it had been me, too. 

—

day 21

hey kris!!! sorry i know it’s the middle of the night there so i hope this doesn’t wake you up but i set an alarm on my phone for the exact time and as of like 10 seconds ago we’re halfway there!!!!!!! 😊😊😊

To her surprise, a response came just a few minutes later. 

:) Knew we could do this.

—

day 23

“I got my class schedule today.”

“Yeah? Show me!”

He held it up awkwardly to the camera, and she squinted at it. “Oh, wow, that’s a lot of blocks. Are you still going to work at Starbucks?”

“Yeah, I’ve been there the whole time I’ve been in school. Just work less hours on weekdays, usually pick up some early morning weekend shifts.”

“Oh, that sucks.”

He shrugged. “It works out. I, uh, I’ve got some scholarships that cover most of my tuition, so then it’s, y’know. Rent money and stuff.”

Anna frowned, feeling suddenly acutely aware of how much money she was making for a lot less work. “Will you have, like...any free time?”

“Oh, yeah, of course,” he said quickly, suddenly sounding nervous. “I promise I’ll still have time to hang out with you and stuff, just--”

“No, no that’s like-- shit, that’s not what I meant, Kris, I mean I kind of did but like-- I’m not trying to like, pressure you or--”

“No, I get it, I--”

“No, I mean like school is way important and you like--”

“Seriously, when I say we can--”

Anna took a deep breath. “Okay. You talk first.”

“I, um. I don’t want you to think, like, I won’t make time for you or something, though. Um-- that was all.”

She smiled, wishing she could be there in person; it was so much easier to reassure him when she could just squeeze his hand. “Seriously, that’s not what I meant. I was just worried about you, ‘cause that’s, like, a lot of stress. So if there’s anything I can do to like, help or whatever, just...just let me know. Like...with anything.”

“Seriously, I think it’ll help a ton to just have a pretty girl keeping me company while I study.”

She felt her cheeks turn pink. “What if I end up wanting to distract you?”

Now she wasn’t the only one blushing.

---

day 30

“Miss you.”

“Miss you, too.”

Tonight, there wasn’t really anything else to say.

—- 

day 34

He’d stopped leaving his phone on silent overnight; it was silly, really, but he always had a tiny fear that maybe something would happen over in Romania while he was asleep, and maybe Anna would need to reach him, and there probably wouldn’t be anything he could actually do...but still.

Despite that, though, it still took a lot to wake him, so when his phone went off one night close to three in the morning, he nearly missed the call. “Hello?” he mumbled sleepily, putting it to his ear.

He heard a familiar little giggle. “It’s FaceTime, Kris. I’m sorry to wake you up, I just-- I really wanted you to see this.”

“Oh-- hang on.” He fumbled for his glasses on the nightstand, sliding them on and blinking blearily at the screen. “Um...where are you? I just see, like...the ceiling?”

“Oh-- that’s cause I gave my phone to Honey, just a second, and she’ll show you.”

The phone was lifted up suddenly by a pretty woman with bronze skin and dark hair thrown up into a bun. “Nice to meet you, Anna’s boyfriend.”

He wondered if she could see him blush even in the dark room. “Nice to meet you, too.”

“Okay, okay, I’m ready!” he heard Anna chirp from somewhere. “Turn the camera!”

Honey did with a laugh, and Kristoff sat upright, his eyes wide. Anna was in a deep blue ballgown that fit perfectly to her torso before flaring out into a long, shimmery skirt. Her hair was down, set in curls that shone especially bright against the dark color of the gown, and she was smiling so brightly he thought his heart was going to burst.

“You look beautiful, baby,” he said, half-convinced he was still dreaming.

She was quiet for a moment, and then he realized she was blushing bright red. He heard Honey giggle, and then the phone was being handed back over to Anna. “You’ve never called me that before.”

“What, beautiful? I definitely--”

“No, I--” Her blush deepened. “Kris, are you wearing a shirt?”

He glanced down. “Oh-- uh, no, I’m not. Sorry, I didn’t think you’d be able to see without the lights--”

A mischievous glint was twinkling in her eye. “Trust me, Bjorgman, there’s nothing to apologize for.”

Now he was blushing, too. “Um-- so you’ve got to be filming something special today, right?”

“Yeah, the big ballroom scene. I just...I really love this dress, and the way Honey did my hair and stuff, and I, um...I wanted you to see.”

He smiled softly. “I’m glad. You really do look so, so beautiful.”

She opened her mouth to say something else, but then he heard Honey call, “Hey, Anna, say bye to the boyfriend, they want you on set in five.”

Anna turned back to the camera, looking suddenly nervous. “Kris, are you my boyfriend?”

“Do you want me to be?”

“Yeah.”

He grinned, no longer sleepy. “Okay.”

Anna laughed. “Okay?”

“Hey, it’s still the middle of the night, and I’m still kind of speechless after seeing you in that dress. Cut me some slack.”

“Go back to bed. Sorry I woke you up.”

He yawned. “I’m not.”

---

day 40

“Look! All packed!” She grinned, turning her phone quickly around the room to show off her only slightly overstuffed suitcases. “And ready to come home!”

“Do you think you’ll miss it?”

“No, I mean...it’s beautiful and all here, but it’s still not home.”

Kristoff grinned at that. “You still want me to pick you up from the airport?”

“Um, is that even a question?”

He laughed. “Just making sure! I mean, six weeks is a long time, don’t know if you got tired of me.”

“Kristoff, the second I get back to LA, I’m like, jumping on you again and kissing the fuck out of you.”

He waggled his eyebrows. “And then?”

She could tease him, too. “And then you’d better hurry the hell up and take me back to your apartment so I can show you how much I missed you.”

“....Jesus Christ. Why does waiting two more days suddenly feel so much longer than the other forty?”

[dulharpa]

this is for hayley! @whistlingwillows a dear friend <3333

it’s meant to be a birthday present haha. i just want to shower you in love;;; so thought maybe i could go through as many of your fics and comment on them :^)))

(TO EVERYONE ELSE: please go to @whistlingwillows blog and read her fics!!! they are SO FCKIN GOOD AND AMAZING AND UGH HER MIND (it’s a lot of mcu and her bucky and steve fics are a*. i DEFINITELY RECOMMEND))

i wish you a VERY happy birthday and i hope we stay friends for many more years <3333333333 

i’m going through your masterlist heehee ;)))

ah first off, nice theme! i never could rlly see it before because i’m always on mobile heehee. also sorry for not reviewing them before??? i don’t usually read fics on tumblr as you’ve probably guessed;;

anyways, IM GON REVIEW THE SHIT OUT OF THESE >:DDDD

far from home -  bucky x stark sister!reader

firstly, i like how youre introducing the reader from buckys pov, like you can sort of already gather what shes like from them

‘Bucky can hear Tony’s soft inhale, feel the intensity of the man’s glare directed at Steve. He shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but a twitch of muscle would be enough to alert both men that he’s here. With the amount of tension crackling in the air, a brush against the wall would be equivalent to a thousand cymbals crashing in cacophony.’

IM CRYING ALREADY. the imagery in here is GLORIOUS. your tone here is so fitting! oo and the alliteration here is perfecto

ooooooo!! the backstory coming in  👀👀

‘despite what some people think that Steve and Captain America are two different personas, there will always be parts of Steve in the Avenger, and parts of the Avenger in Steve. They both want to believe in something good. They are, after all, one in the same.// Just as how Bucky and the Winter Soldier are the same man despite everything. HYDRA simply amplified the hate, fertilized the seeds of rage, curated the quiet thunder within his soul, within James Buchanan Barnes so that the Winter Soldier could thrive.’

yIKES! lol this is very character study like! nICE. it hurts tho, my poor children, i love you both 

oo ‘starlight eyes’ that is a very nice way of describing them

‘“Then what was London?” The protesters. “São Paulo?” The earthquake. “Vancouver?” Freezing cold water.//“Look, I care if Stark’s gonna run us over trying to find her. I care enough because she’s part of our team. Come off it, Steve. I know she can take care of herself. I’m gonna take a nap. Dr. Cho said no partying post-Singapore and what do you know, we throw the biggest party ever.’

ooo singapore uwu and london? (coincidence? haha jkjk) and the hints abt reader and buckys background are so good?? but so annoying??? like i just wanna KNOW yknow?? 

‘The water runs copper and the sting bites at his palm as he tries not to think. Tries to focus on the numbing cold that runs over his skin.’ 

your imagery is so vivid?? im actually in awe??? i am so regretful i havent kept reading your fics. like i know they are amazing, i just keep putting them off??? idk man. hopefully this makes up for it (gd tho, im still not done with commenting on one fic. this is what im doing with my motivation teehee ;)

‘ He feels weak. Tired. He wants to go back to bed but he also wants to stay out in the sun for a few hours more. The sun kisses his skin through the windows and he squints against the blue sky, wondering ‘

mood during this quarantine lol

‘“Oh, right.” Your voice is flat, uninterested, cold, as you stare at him. “You killed my parents.”Shit.‘

 OUCH LMAO THATS C O L D, O GOT +100 PHYSIC DAMAGE FROM JUST READING THAT

ooo robin as a nickname noice. very much gives me batman vibes lol

oh! and the way of doing the ‘flashback’ is neat! very original. it both tells us what happened AND buckys reaction to it again. he can re-analyse himself and reader. very cool

‘If you walk away now, don’t bother coming back!” Silence. Bucky can hear his own strained breathing, your soft sigh as you soaked in his ultimatum.’

👀👀 yikes that ultimatum. :// not good bucky. tbf theyre both trying to hurt each other but Yikes

eyy!!! readers pov!! finally! and the switch after we find out the outsiders pov? brilliant

oh no :(( more angst

‘When’s the last time you saw your therapist?”“Don’t have one. I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”’ they BOTH need therapists;;;;

very good fic!!! :DD they rlly do hate each other! i definitely like how you went back and forth with the timeline! it gave me a v strong idea on what yn was like even before we rlly got introduced. i am now very curious on where reader is? i love your characterisations! 

i will read the 10k+ fics but heck the last one took me ages lolol (i will comment in the future tho!! i promise <3 ) (that took me over an hour jjhghgdjh)

slipping away- amnesiac modern bucky x reader

omg,,, AMNESIA! >:DDDDDD

‘ Put your fucking seatbelt on’

oh no, istg theyre going to have a car crash arent they (’ doesn’t put the seatbelt on to spite you.’ NO PLEASE PUT IT ON U DUMBASS)

ok,,,,, at LEAST he put it on before he got hit, thank heck. but still. youre so cruel to your poor characters lmaoo

oh gosh

‘You fall apart slowly, like pieces of you peeling away until you’re nothing more than your broken heart. The sobs that wrack your body are relentless and you shove your forearm into your mouth to muffle your cries. You want to bite into your skin. You want to distract yourself from the agony tearing you to shreds. You want to feel anything but the pain.///Tears sweep into your hair, cloud your vision and your whole face floods with heat as you try to breathe through the pain. You’re cleaved into pieces on that bed, eyes squeezed shut as the tears keep flowing, and your throat burns’

this hurts damn, it is so vivid?? i can really feel it 

i am so glad you got into writing yk?? so glad

NO PLS, TELL HIM. TELL HIM :((( ‘shes nice once you get to know her?? shes known nat for years now!! years!!

oh god ‘he looks younger without the burden of your time together’ this is so angsty omg

‘Well, he was stumbling through his apology and I just let him finish.” Your body fills with warmth as you remember his embarrassed smile, the way he shoved his baseball cap farther down his head, chin tucked to his chest, trying to hide that face. “When he was done, I opened my mouth to say something polite but what came out was ‘You look like someone I’d very much like to kiss’.”

this is so soft i stg im crying in the club

OH SHITTTTTTTTTTT , you left it off like that!!! thats so cruel!!!! i can’t!!! how dare you!!!! :””””””((( im typing this with tears in my eyes ill have u know!!

anyway!!! very good fic!! you could honestly make that into a longfic very easily lol. i felt too many emotions :(( 

i was just about to say where is the fluff!! where is it!! when i saw the next one and yay :))) pls i cant have more angsty stuff rn

.

cookies and rings and things bucky and reader

‘how much do you love me?’ ‘count the snowflakes, multiply by a million’

did you have to start the fic off with such a SOFT line? its so soft! so TENDER 

‘He wonders what kinda insane person wears socks without any clothes on, but then decides that it’s the kind of person who’s fallen in love with him.’  jesus, the soft moments filled with love are the greatest <3

you can write fluff so well, whyd you have to pain me with all that angst ;””””) (1/10 hurt, 9/10 comfort is the way to go lolol) (jkjk ill read the angsty ones too when i have the spoons) (gonna reread that hydra steve one and ik thatll fuck me UP)

‘ Then, he can feel the cold metal of the ring she slid onto her own finger less than twenty-four hours ago and realizes that he had thought a lot of things shouldn’t be possible, and yet they still are. ‘

you literally brought me to tears reading this softness, you have truly found my weakness

‘ She’s so damn gorgeous with flour on her face and eye bags beneath her eyes that he’s sure she will inevitably make his heart burst ‘

he already likes her so much! i can’t believe this is affecting me so much :’)

‘Bucky is quite sure Sam is in love with his girlfriend in the fact that he’s in love with the fact that his girlfriend is possibly in love with Bucky’

this is so soft??? sam loves reader bc reader loves bucky sm. pls my hear <3333

you do fluff SO WELL DAMN 

‘F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice echoes in his small little perch and he still thinks it’s weird without having the side effect of Stark in his suit chasing after him to hear the A.I. but he shoves that uncomfortable feeling of the dead man out of his head. That is too much regret to unpack right now on a mission. ‘

yike bringing back that reminder oof

but thats so soft??? (i am def overusing soft but,,,,, i love it and the vibe) she sent him cookies! god i can feel the love  

‘She expresses her feelings through cooking, which Bucky has learnt the hard way. One time, they got into an argument over something stupid—he can’t even remember what started it—and came to the kitchen at 2AM to see her sitting at the kitchen island crying her eyes out and surrounded by baskets of muffins.’

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 my hEART

you show how much they love each other in so many ways??? i am dying

“Alright, I like it.” Rolling his eyes, he pecks her forehead and she smiles victoriously. It’s so adorable that Bucky, with less than three hours of sleep, adds, “God, I want to marry you.//”“What?”//Oh.Shit.

oh my god! i am literally tearing up!!! AGAIN!!!!!!!!

oh shit o am literally crying

your fluff got me crying harder than your angst i hope youre happy

I really hope you enjoy reading this?? i keep forgetting to like text you but i wanted to do something for your birthday. especially in quarantine when everythings gone crazy. one year i swear ill do something REALLY good for you. not making promises bc i hate if i dont. but ill like, learn how to podfic because you D E S E R V E  I T 

ive spent like three hours doing this lolol 

thank you so much for everything hayley!

[quokkalatte]

Mixtape pt. 4 [M.YG]

Part 4

Category: One Shot series

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Female!Reader

Summary: Living as an aspiring rap artist in Seoul, all you want to do is work on your music and try to get your name out there. Of course when you have someone as annoying and spiteful as Min Yoongi makes that extremely difficult. Until he decides to help you out.

Warnings: smut, language, some Namjoon action (which ofc is a warning cause oof), angry Yoongi, alcohol consumption, perhaps some angst but not really

Warnings for this chapter: Honestly none except slight mentions of sex

Author's Note:so sorry it took so long to get his out thank you for being patient ♡ this chapter is short. Like really short but I'll try to make the next one longer ~ Autumn

Tags; @notsolovelykarsyn @psychoticshawtyy

Cannot tag: @deesixx2801

[Message me to be added to the tag list so you can be notified for new updates]

× × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × ×

It was like clockwork, waking up again and feeling angry and bitter at myself. Making myself something to drink and brooding and contemplating telling Yoongi not to come, tell him I'm sick. Any excuse not to see him again.

I sat on the couch, staring at Yoongi's contact, chewing my lip. I pressed his contact and texted him.

Me: don't come today, I've come down with something

Jerk: OK

I sighed, putting my phone down, going to take a long shower and try and get over the pounding in my skull, drinking was never a good idea. I undressed, stepping into the shower and allowing the steaming water to pour down my body, my eyes closing in content. I lathered myself in soap and wrapped myself in a towel, ruffling my hair with another to dry it faster. A faint knock had me frowning, dropping the towel I was drying my hair with I quickly adjusted the one covering my body, making sure I was appropriately covered, I went to the door, checking the peep hole and nearly yelped in shock.

Yoongi stood outside the door, container in hand and two drinks in another. His blonde hair was tousled and he was peering down the hall at something, scratching at his neck for a moment, pushing the grey goodie he wore for better access. I let out a short gasp. I told him I was sick! What was he still doing here? I backed away, from the door, eyeing it like it was deadly or toxic.

"Open the door Y/n I know you aren't still asleep, you texted me 30 minutes ago" Yoongi's aggregated voice came from the other side of the door. I swallowed and glared

"I told you I was sick Yoongi"

"And? Just let me in please your druggy neighbor keeps peeking at me and it's unnerving" he says, the last part fading into a whisper. I groan, pulling the door open, and Yoongi steps in quickly. He freezes once he sees my attire. Color floods his pale cheeks, and I blush darkly. "Uh, did I interrupt something?"

"N-No I just got done showering. I wasn't expecting you to still come" I mumble, excusing myself to dress, leaving Yoongi in my living room. I quickly pulled on a hoodie and sweatpants. I found him peering around my desk, and I clear my throat, and he turns to me. "Finished?" He asked and I roll my eyes.

"I still don't know why you're here, I told you not to come"

"I was already on my way when I got your text, and it wouldn't be the first time I've been around you when you're ill" he prompts, walking over to my kitchen island and setting the box and drink tray down.

"Have you considered maybe I don't want to see you?"I snap, fed up with him already. Memories of last night kept swimming in a haze, the alcohol making it dim to remember everything, but I understood the jist of watching Yoongi stick his tongue down some girl's throat and going to bed with her.

"Have you worked on a song yet?"

He completely ignored my question, opening the box and the tempting smell of sushi wafted towards me. I folded my arms, and huff

"You didn't answer my question"

"You didn't answer mine" he smirks, plucking a sushi roll and plopping into his mouth. "I brought you some too come eat" he mumbles, his cheeks puffed as he chewed. I growl in frustration and take one. "Well?"

"Yes I've worked on the song" I grumble, remembering the furious drunk scribbling I did last night in anger. Yoongi swallowed, taking a drink from his cup and dusted his hands on his pants.

"Let's see then" he asks, and I walk over to my desk and snatch the papers and handed them to him. He raised his eyebrows at me, before scanning the angry lyrics. I knew what they were, those were the one thing I remember about last night. The lyrics spoke of harsh love, love that wasn't reciprocated and the pain of having to watch him move about and not do anything about it. I suddenly realized the inspiration of the song was reading it, his eyebrows furrowed and his mouth formed the words. I grew nervous, wanting to know what was running through his head. He read through them twice before handing them back to me.

"They're very meaningful, full of emotion. I'd tweak the grammar a bit and take out a couple of repitions" he says, but his mouth moved as if he wanted to ask something else. His tone was guarded and he took another sushi roll and chewed it. I nod, returning the paper to the desk. The silence that followed was awkward. Yoongi wanted to ask something, I could see it in his eyes. It did nothing more than agitate my already hostile mood with him. He chewed the sushi in silence, eyeing me as I watched cars come and go out the window above my desk. It got to much.

"Just ask what you want to ask Yoongi" I sigh, turning to look at him. He seemed embarrassed that I had caught him, but as he eyed me, his nervousness quickly snapped and he spoke.

"Is the song about the guy you're with?" He asks, tone cold and judging.

"What guy?" I frown at him, halfly with exasperation

"The Panda Express guy" he said impatiently, like I was an idiot of some sort. My eyes widened and a blush rose on my cheeks.

"I'm not seeing the Panda Express guy Yoongi" I growl.

"Are you sure?" His tone mocking.

"Positive."

"Then what are the looks he gives you every time we go out after a session?"he accuses. I groan, this boy. He acts almost like he's jealous. Which couldn't be true considering the activities he had partaken in merely 12 or so hours ago.

"That's what they are Yoongi. Looks. He kept trying to ask me out but I turned him down. He thinks we have something special after we drunkenly kissed at a friends party over a year ago" I scoff. Yoongi squinted at me, trying to see if I was telling the truth.

"Jimin?" I groan, wanting to strangle him.

"Just a friend"

"You sure?" His tone was sharp "you seemed awful cozy last night"

"Dammit Yoongi I don't like Jimin! I don't like the Panda Express guy! I've never done more than kiss a guy so stop treating me like I'm some common whore" I yell, fists clenching in anger. Yoongi blinked, taken aback my my outburst. He looked guilty for a split second, and he eyed me. I blushed, realizing I had admitted my viginity to a guy who had probably taken many.

"You've never had sex?" He asks after a pause. I turn my eyes to the ground, not meeting his gaze

"No. Never found a guy I liked enough to do things with" I mumble. I didn't like the silence. That all that seemed to be happening were bouts of awkward and tension-filled silence. I just wish he'd speak. Yoongi was always bad with words, except when he was rapping. Then he could spit out words faster than I could comprehend.

"Neither have I" I was caught in my thoughts that I almost missed him saying it. I looked at him, and he looked back. This pissed me off. I balled my fists, walking over to him, and grabbed him by his hoodie. He yelped as I dragged him towards the door. The shock must have allowed me to do so, considering Yoongi was taller than me and more built. I shoved him towards the door.

"Get out" I snap. "I don't want you here again. If all you're going to do is patronize me and slut shame me and tell lies then I don't want you here. Ever" Yoongi sputtered at me

"What are you-"

"No!" I cut him off "you don't get to listen to me announce my intact viginity only for you to reply with you haven't had sex either" I growl, pointing my finger in his face.

"I havent-"

"Liar! You had your tongue down some poor girls throat just last night! I saw you so I dare you to deny it" I hiss. He swallowed cautiously.

"I won't deny it, but I didn't have sex with her" I snort and he glared at me. "it's true. I was going to, but I stopped. I always stop. I can't bring myself to do it" he mumbles, running a hand through his hair. I frown, not fully believing him. He always had girls at parties, every single time. He'd take a girl upstairs, and now he's trying to say he's never slept with them? I was doubtful.

"Why do you stop? They're pretty and eager" I ask

"Because I don't like them. I don't want to have sex with someone I don't care about. It needs to mean something." He says. I study him before replying. He seemed honest and genuine, I didn't see a trace of a lie on his features. My next question I knew would anger him, it was a touchy subject, but I couldn't deny my jealousy that wiggled it's way into my head.

"The girl in the song you wrote for, is she special?" I ask. Yoongi's gaze was intense, and I had to will myself not to look away. I stared into his brown eyes as he spoke.

"More than she could possibly know" he says, his voice low and calm. The air sparked with a new kind of tension, created from his words and gaze. It sent pickles of emotion up my spine and caused a round of goose bumps to grace my arms. The jealousy egged me on, I wanted to know more about this girl that apparently plagued his thoughts enough to have a song written for her. Did she know about the crush Yoongi was harboring so deeply for her? Maybe not, or they'd be together already.

I didn't realize how close Yoongi was to me. His face hovered inches away from mine. I could feel the exhaled breath fan across my face and the heat his skin put off warm the air between us. It chilled me, him being so close and my cheeks spread with warmth as I realized he hadn't broken eye contact. He licked his lips, and leaned forward just slightly, his breath setting me aflame.

The loud sound of a phone ringing caused us to jump. Yoongi stumbled back into the door and I turned to find the offending noise. Yoongi phone was vibrating and ringing nest to the food and drinks. I tried to still my rapid hear beating as Yoongi quickly walked over to it, picking it up and answering it.

"Hello?" His voice was higher pitched and his cheeks were flushed pink. Incomprehensible words came from the other side. Yoongi hummed "okay I'm in my way. Try to get him not to move it" he says and hangs up. He glanced at me "I need to go"

"What happened?" I ask, instantly worried. He wrinkled his nose

"Namjoon's roommate, Seokjin, got his hand caught in the sink. Reached down to grab something and it got stuck. I need to go help get it out while Namjoon panics unnecessarily" he says. I open my mouth to respond, to tell him I wanted to come, but he was already out the door with a quick slam and a rushing sound of clothing, leaving me alone and confused.

[princesstigerbelle]

Bathroom supervisor 😂😂😂

[overbakedone]

1

this is the first time i've ever started writing my thoughts and feelings anywhere before. this is not easy.

instead of writing things and then deleting it all because its not good enough or it sounds stupid i'm just going to write it now and stop backspacing. i guess i should start with where i am in life right now so there is some perspective.

im 25, im a bakers apprentice, i live with my parents, i have a girlfriend, lets call her ‘C’ who for the first time feels right to me despite everything, i barely have any friends, they don't ever want to see me, i don't have much time in my life right now, i work all night and struggle to fit sleep into my schedule. but things are really the best they have ever been for me. i just started an AFL 9′s competition, weird i usually have no confidence going into these things and will either quit after the first practice or not even show up, i really kinda enjoyed it and am excited for next week.

i've wanted to start writing anything for a few months now, i guess now i have some time. time is so fucked up, i wish there was more of it, i wish i could sleep without wasting my day, i wish i didn't have to compromise sleep for everything but i do, i guess its part of being a baker, its a job i am loving and i think i've found my life passion but it has its ups and downs. my partner C expects a lot of my time i guess, she can be very needy at times, demanding almost, sometimes i feel pressured by her to sacrifice my sleep, personal plans and hobbies and interests for her, but i know what she feels, she wants the same thing i do. she has problems making friends, or keeping friends, she feels isolated and alone, and she wants my companionship, and i want that too and despite anything i feel in the moment i always feel happy about her at the end of the day.

i should be grateful for the relationship i am in right now, i really should be grateful for a lot of stuff, my parents for allowing me to stay here still, being so supportive and also allowing and accepting of me and really tolerant of the shit i do. ok so i do smoke week every day right so that's already something to do at home that's difficult, i'm pretty sure they know and don't care or even agree that my life has been better since i started smoking, fuck i used to be on antidepressants, i took one every day at a certain time, it made me feel a bit better, ok sounds just like smoking right, expect when i didn't take this pill i got nausea, headaches, severe episodes of depression, i couldn't eat my appetite was so fucked up i was eating one meal a day and it was like a piece of bread or takeaway food. since the smoking started i've found some actual passion in life, i don't feel like a useless number anymore i guess.

one of the things on my mind always is my friends, since i was in highschool i havent really had a group of friends, i feel like i am a social person but then when it comes to it i feel like i just get burned. a lot of my old friends turned out to be secretly hating me and not wanting me around, some sort of pity friendship, i was an asshole in my time and honestly was not a good friend myself, do you pay for the dumb shit you do as a teenager, the people you fuck over go from your life completely yet new people you meet do the same things to you like they know. i had/have a long term best friend, J, we had been mates for years, we worked at my old job dominoes together for a bit, and kinda hung out a few times, but not until we got into PC gaming together did we form a bond. after that we would chat every day, play games together, watch the footy together, go places even though he lived across the city from me. one thing that changed massively in my life was i quit drinking alcohol, and then i felt like all my friends both disagree with my choice and resent me for it, like for some reason i have to take the same drugs they are taking at that time to be their friends. so J has just grown more and more distant, i get that we are older now, we both have partners, jobs that take a lot of our time, but then when we hang out or talk he seems disinterested, more interested with his friends that i introduced him to (from our discord server) and has seemingly replaced me, none of these guys i really like at all, in fact the only one of the new group i like is the one girl in it because she actually has interesting things to say.

fuck that was a paragraph, i guess i should talk about alcohol.

alcohol has fucked up my life, i cant repair the mistakes and stupid things i did while drinking alcohol, so they are there, i guess its just talking about it left. to start off, when i drink alcohol i have a hard time finding my limit, i feel like i swing from nothing to completely blacked out, puking, sobbing and basically hating myself very quick, i feel sick for days after drinking, barely able to eat, leave bed, move, i feel so nauseous and tired, its so fucked up what it does to your body, but oh your mind is even worse. i've broken off relationships, cheated, threatened people, gotten into fights, brawls, got my arm broken, hurt myself repeatedly, gotten arrested and a criminal record that may prevent me from going to canada next year, and is currently delaying booking flights, ive missed work, shown up drunk same clothes no shower to work, but the main thing that alcohol does to me is makes me sad. alcohol makes me so fucking sad, it makes me reach into the deepest pits i can think of and brings out all the emotions that are in there, my ex being the main one. every time i used to drink id think of her, call her, text her, go on her facebook, look up her instagram her twitter, fuck it drive my car to her house to see if her cars there like that does anything or means anything just fucking alcohol is so stupid. i never want to feel like that again, i never want to sabotage my life, sabotage and self destruct my relationships, but i guess losing my friends is the thing i have to take in consideration. australia is a fucked up place, where drinking heavily is the social norm and if you don't get fucked up or even have a beer with mates you're a loser.

i just want a deep connection with my friends. when i was in newcastle with my partner, i  met her friends there that she had been living with, despite the fucked up things that happened to her there, she lost a lot of friends herself and a long time friend, had trouble finding new ones, trouble fitting in, the friends she had there were the most honest and truly welcoming, connecting people ive met, and i miss that. i miss having a friend you can just, go over to their place, sit around for 3-4 hours talking shit, laughing, listening to music, relaxing and sharing stories and shit. weird that people can have such an effect on you in a short time. the life i live here is full of making plans, only for them to be cancelled, inviting friends over, for nobody to show up, cancelled plans all the fucking time, i've never been asked to just come over and chill, never its always some group thing that i'm invited to as well. i even try talking to them about this, i told a group of girl friends i have, i miss you all and haven't seen you in so long, we need to have a casual hangout, and the message was almost completely ignored, i asked them all to come to mind to watch the grand final, the house was free, i got a big projector screen, big comfy couch, live central right in the middle of everyone, nobody even replied or brought it up again, yet the second someone else that lives in the far corners of perth brought it up everyone started chatting about their plan to go. so if that's not my friends making it obvious they don't want to see me, they only include me then thats fucked up. i don't know what to say, this happens all the time, my 21st birthday i invited 65 people, and less than 15 people showed up. its hard to keep trying, always trying, i always try to make social events, i always ask friends what they are doing, when they can see me, make plans, they get cancelled, they are busy, they say they're coming then don't show up, most of the time i never hear a word too, they just dont show and don't even apologize, is that a fair thing to do, yeah sometimes i dont go to my friends events, i'm too fucking tired or just don't feel like going, somethings come up, i tell them straight away i cant make it i'm sorry this has come up, yet i don't get the same courtesy.

am i an unlikable person

the guys at work seem to like me, so i started a baking apprenticeship, basically i started watching great british bake off and picked it up as a hobby, making cakes and stuff, actually i should go back. so i used to work in some shitty small software company in the city, 9-5, peak hour traffic, office drama, workplace bullies, understaffed, overworked, red tape and bullshit everywhere, i quit after 2.5 years for mental health reasons, i made a lot of money but had to move on, so i spent a year off , it was only supposed to be a few months, go on a holiday road trip with my then partner, S, she broke up with me via a text message right after eagles lost to melbourne at home, basically the footy game was more disappointing, we had a shit relationship, i think i resented her, i cheated on her, yeah i'm an awful person and deserve everything, she was an emotionally manipulative person, terrified of her own body and sex, tried to dominate my life and change me, im glad we broke up. so i stayed unemployed for a long time, over a year, barely looking, until i found this baking apprenticeship, not only did i apply for the job and write a completely custom cover letter (im so fucking lazy i usually close a job application the second it requires anything more than an apply button) AND i called back a few weeks later when i heard nothing, well turns out that call landed me the job, the apprentice they hired instead of me was useless, had no passion and was a slow worker. so i got the job, and basically have been killing it ever since, i get a lot of praise at work (lots of criticism too) baking is one of those things that takes time, its all about time, so i got a lot to learn but i am actually confident once in my life, holy shit i have a job i like and am good at. is this the dream?> lol 

so today i started writing my feelings down, and its kinda felt good, but i'm exhausted now, and my fingers hurt, so this is the end of my first post, i hope nobody reads it, its really just for me but i don't know. 

thanks for listening   i guess 

[missingcecillaneous]

misc,

alright, alright, yeah. i see your point. but look, he needed a place to crash, and. well, better i end up wallowing than him, right? hes only been in the kitchen so far, anyway, and thats easy to clean. he just made a beeline and situated himself in front of the sink, staring out the window. havent gotten him to eat anything, and he hasnt told me anything about the land or spouted any of his awful, amateur psychoanalyses yet.

just in case this gets to you a little late, though… i dunno. its just flashes, but. something about retro nostalgia? aspects of growing up on the bridge gapping no technology and an abundance of it. the eldritch or incomprehensible, too, and what comes with it. that sort of. hazy sense of self, the dissociation and isolation. a threat looming, but literally undiscoverable. and queerness. but i think you knew that one. it all seems pretty straightforward to me, but you know how twisted those lands’ intentions can get in translation. ill let you know when hes back to his usual self, portending doom again.

ugh. yknow, on second thought, you might be right about him. barely two paragraphs, and im exhausted. sorry, love. gotta cut this one short.

damn. just remembered i have to tackle the shower tomorrow. wish me luck. let me know what the fruit tastes like? better yet, bring some back! im sure eve wont mind.

miss you. love you. etc, etc. dont forget the blinds.

cecil