#i like it was an instant favourite lol so nothing changed there and it might come for chk chk boom for my favourite song off of this album

[hwanghyunjinenthusiast]

I will admit, I do think I was harsh on ATE when I first heard it.

[imaginespazzi]

NIVI, bestie, the first chapter of Golden Hour (peep me using the actual title!) – fucking spectacular. You know the UCLA fic will live on in my mind forever and it will always have a special place in my heart, but this might give it a run for its money already. Just something about kid fics, it’s just too damn endearing!

Firstly, when you use My Immortal as the song reference, you already know it’s gonna have you in your feels haha. Immaculate song choice btw.

LOL at the shade Indy’s still copping 9 years on. Also, I had a slight jump scare realising that Paige had been at the Wings all this time (@ irl universe, that was simply for the plot, not a manifestation).

DUDE, I just know every scene with Stephie is gonna hit, like ugh it’s all so adorable!! Stephie being just as indecisive as her mother, I would expect nothing less from Azzi’s mini-me. Also, picturing Azzi with kids is just so 😍🥰 I could feel my heart melt throughout their entire scene together.

Manager! Colleen, we love this, truly par for the course. Also, Colleen tryna keep up with the spelling was so real of her, SAME babes.

Ahhhh JANA! I was wondering which menace would be burdened with having to deal with the two idiots! Side note: This just made me even more excited for this big 3 this coming season (it’s what we deserve after being robbed of our other big 3).

The Paige and Stephie scene man, immediately in my top 5 out of all the scenes you’ve ever written.

She really got Paige with the “but you’re not a stranger” huh.

And when she just casually climbs on to Paige’s lap and made sure she got her kisses! P absolutely stood no chance against this kid, she’s stuck at GSV forever now.

The instant bond and attachment they have to each other - ugh I love them so bad already - they’re gonna be such a handful for Azzi to deal with.

Flashback scenes always get me, I may or may not have teared up at this scene, just seeing how in love they were and them thinking they’d be that simple forever, knowing the train derailed somewhere along the way. Heartbreaking.

Jana staying true to her menace roots by putting her foot in her mouth lmao. Also, “children of divorce” lines are always some of my favourites haha, I just know the menaces still have regular group therapy sessions about how mom & dad’s divorce traumatised them cause like is love even real at that point? 😔.

The whole exchange between Paige and Azzi was like whiplash, in the best way, between the banter and how they really feel.

And the last lines – it wouldn’t be you if there wasn’t a perfect full circle/callback moment.

What’s next? (maybe)

The “one snapped string can cause a whole web to dissolve” really got me thinking about how exactly their mutual web was splintered and just how much their breakup affected everyone around them.

I’m also excited to find out who their other teammates are lol.

Can’t wait for the first time that Stephie brings up “Miss Buecks” with Azzi.

I’m also imagining Stephie having a pre-game handshake/ritual with Azzi and then her making one up for her and P 🥹

Most of all, I’m so sat to find out about the breakup, like I need all the details immediately and what happened that “last time”.

Oh and will there be a reveal of how Stephie was conceived?? Although, I’m guessing by the “because Stephie is all Azzi’s” that the other parent is definitely out of the picture?

And before I forget, the title art? header? ate that up once again (I see what you did making it purple)! The tagline too. I mean, you know i'm still partial to the "everything changes, except the ending" cause that really was *chef's kiss* but this was too!

Favourite line/quote:

“I’ve never seen you with braids this early in the year. They used to be your summer braids,” Paige remarks slowly. It’s a mundane change to notice but it’s significant of the larger truth, significant of all the time that’s passed, significant of the fact they don’t know these new versions of each other.

You’re an absolute legend as always, bestie! Can’t wait for the next one 💗

-🙋‍♀️

AHHH BESTIE I was waiting for your review cause like you're lowkey one of my favorite parts of the writing process now so just by that logic you're never allowed to fully leave this app tee hee.

AH I WAS HOPING YOU'D KNOW IT! It just fit really well.

Sorry not sorry Indiana you're just never ending up in my good books and I have no faith in that organization to not still be a cesspool years from now. DALLAS WINGS THIS IS NOT MANIFESTATION PLEASE LOOK AWAY!

Azzi as a girl mom is so self-indulgent like I just know she's meant to be one and would be so amazing so like this fic really is just me vicariously imagining it.

Lmao I had to have Colleen. She was there the first time, it's only fair she has to deal with them again the second time. Without anything to back it up, I also lowkey could see this in real life.

I thought about it for a fair bit but Jana ultimately made the most sense but the other menaces will make an appearance at some point for sure!

The Paige and Stephie scene was one of my favorite scenes to write and again so self-indulgent because I live and die for soft!Paige and especially that with kids? Yeah, I really did that for me lmao.

Yeah there is not Paige Bueckers anymore only Stephie's Ms. Bueckers and they're only about to get more and more attached (until I ruin it? MWAHAHA maybe)

I think I've used that children of divorce line in mutiple fics but ah well it's not like I can plagiarize myself lmao

You know me too well babes. I love my full circle moments, even though this one actually wasn't intentional until the very last line.

I know UCLA was very Pazzi centered but I'm actually really excited to get into other relationships in this fic as well and that line *whispers* was definitely foreshadowing.

I lowkey have no idea what other teammates to give them so that should be fun coming up with a team lmao

WAIT THAT'S SUCH A GOOD IDEA I'M STEALING IT LMAO

Is the "last time" a reference to the actual breakup or something more recent? Hmmm guess we'll find out (and I do mean we cause I haven't decided lmao)

That really is the question of the century huh? But yes, while it lowkey would've been fun (and easy) to never go into that, the mystery of Stephie's conception will be revealed in due time.

AHH THANK YOU! I'm not the greatest editor but I do really enjoy making covers like this so it means a lot that you liked it.

Love you babes, I'm so glad you're along for the ride again <3

[flowerkidu]

Every day I am more and more sure that I will never ever come out to my parents because what the fuck they have going on

As u may know (or u may not) I love Enkidu from fgo very much, they r a character I associate myself with the most, r my absolutely favourite of all time and I think about them almost every day. It just make me feel better. My mother know about that because it is hard to hide something I am really interested in. But there is a problem.

She constantly call Enkidu a girl (because "she has long hair") and every time when I correct her the only thing I hear is " but FOR ME she always will be a girl" (again, just because of the hair and probably androgynous look).

As u may also know (or u may also not) I am a trans person, my name is Gilbert, I feel totally like a man despite my femine look, I use a binder, he/they pronouns and all my friends know I am a boy. Sometimes I have that thought "maybe I will try to come out, maybe I should give them some hints" but then I remember my mom can't even acknowledge that anime character is not a girl and all these stupid ideas flow out of my head in an instant.

I know all that might sound dumb at first and some ppl would say my worries r not making sense because anime character ≠ ur own kid but please note I live in a homophobic country, my mother always wanted a daughter, my father is openly transphobic and I often hear how great girl I am. It is at least depressing.

On the other hand, I know they love me. They deeply and truly love me. At the same time this person they love is not the real me. They love someone who I am supposed to be, someone they think I am, someone who they want to exist. And if I want to be safe, there is nothing I can do to change that.

So yeah, an anime character can easily show u ur parent's view on trans ppl

Here is Enkidu and thanks if u read all that lol

[hollandsangel]

i hope new york holds you | c.b.

crying bc this imagine gives me corbina vibes

inspired by the line “i hope new york holds you, i hope it holds you like i do” from la la lost you by NIKI and 88rising (it doesn’t really reconcile w the imagine but it’s still a vv good song)

summary: loving someone far away hurts sometimes

warnings: not sad this time lol

His house still smelled like you. He was still missing the chain he had let you borrow, but he didn’t want it back. 

You were back home, in New York. You always told him that you loved how it got cold in the winter there, that the way Times Square looked on New Year’s Eve was one of your favourite views, and that nothing could beat a New York thrift shop. New York was your home, but you were his.

He missed you more and more every time you said goodbye, he hated waking up without you in his bed, hated waking up when you were across the country. Corbyn knew you missed him too, he could tell from all the hoodies of his you shoved into your suitcase before you left him each time and from all the random packages he received from you unannounced. 

Sometimes the long distance thing was good, especially once the two of you had gotten used to it over the past two years. But sometimes, it wasn’t so good. Sometimes he would listen to voicemails you had sent him months ago, other times you would call him crying at one am because you just couldn’t stand to be so far from him for so long. When he would pick you up at the airport, neither of you would let go of each other for nearly four hours afterwards, but that’s how you liked it.

—

Daniel looked over to the seat Corbyn had just been sitting in, his attention being drawn to the ringing phone. Daniel grabbed Corbyn’s phone from the couch cushion,, sliding to accept your facetime request.

“Hey babe, I was wondering if you left one of your chains here when you came last month, because I found a silver one but it’s not mine and I’m pretty sure I saw- oh hey Daniel.” You finally looked up from your bedroom floor, which you had been tidying up when you called your boyfriend.

“Don’t tell Corbyn I called you babe.”

Daniel laughed at you, promising he wouldn’t when Corbyn came into his view. “Hey, Corbyn! Y/n called and I picked up, she called me babe because she wasn’t looking at the screen.”

“Daniel! You promised!” He only shrugged towards the phone, handing it to Corbyn who had a bright grin lighting up his face.

“Hey pretty girl.” 

“He betrayed me.”

“It’s okay, as long as he isn’t calling you babe.” The words came tumbling out between the grin on his lips.

“Ew.” You cringed, only making Corbyn’s smile widen. 

“So how’s New York? Snowing there yet?” he asked, sitting back down on the now empty couch.

“A little, most of it came yesterday and today. It looked really pretty last night, I should've sent you a video.” you leaned out of the frame to plug in your phone before continuing, “if it snows again, I’ll make sure to send one.”

“I can’t wait.”

“So how ‘bout you, how’s L.A. been?”

Corbyn let out a huff, his hair flying upwards as he did. “Fast.”

Your eyebrows bowed together, examining your boyfriend through the screen. “How so bub?”

He sunk further into the sofa, switching the hand he held his phone in before he spoke again. “Well there’s rehearsals and interviews, then there’s fittings and recordings and shows and the guy’s and I have been getting together basically every night at Daniel’s to write. We just keep going, and I love it, I really do. This is the dream, but I miss my bed.” he finished with a laugh. “I miss you. I wish we could be together for christmas this year.

The corners of your lips turned up in a sad smile, “I miss you too baby. And I’ll see you on New Years’ Eve.” your attempts to comfort him were fruitless.

“I hope New York holds you.” He took a small breath, “hope it holds you like I do.”

You smiled at him, and he admired you through the pixilated facetime resolution. “No one holds me like you do Corb.”

—

The change in weather from New York to L.A. always took you by surprise. You boarded the plane with snow in your hair and got off with the sun kissing your skin. Even two days before New Years Eve, the breeze was light and the air was hot. Your body buzzed as you pulled your ringing phone from your back pocket, worried it would be your boyfriend and that you would have to lie to him about your location again. The nerves in your body relaxed slightly when the name across your screen revealed Daniel’s name.

“Do you think he knows?” your voice was worried as you spoke into the phone, eyes searching for your luggage on the conveyor belt.

“What a greeting y/n/n.”

“Oh, hi Daniel, how are you? Yeah, I’m good too. Okay so do you think Corb knows I’m here to surprise him three days early?” 

“You’re the worst. And nah, he’s at my house with Zach and Jonah working out right now, so he’s definitely distracted.”

You finally found your suitcase and started looking for your gate, dying to get out of the airport. “What does he think you’re doing then?”

“Picking up the food we ordered, which I still need to grab by the way.”

“Alright, as long as you buy me lunch.”

Once you had made it through the airport, you had to try and navigate for Daniel’s car. Lucky, he saw you first and drove right up to you, and you were happy to see a familiar face. 

“He’s gonna be so excited to see you, like might actually jump on you excited.”

“I hope so, I really miss him too.”

The drive back to Daniel’s house had you restless, all you wanted was to be back in Corbyn’s arms.

Daniel had you take the food into the back where the boys were, knowing that Corbyn would be caught off guard. With that, you casually walked through the house into the back yard, setting the two bags of food on the table before speaking up.

“So, who ordered what?” Corbyn snapped up at your voice, his eyes finding you immediately.

“y/n!? What are you doing here!?” he was at your side in an instant, pulling you into him as tightly as he could. You didn’t even mind that he was sweaty and out of breath, at least he was finally with you.

“I missed you baby, merry late christmas.” you mumbled against his chest, tightening the hold you had on him.

“I missed you more, I love you so much.” he lifted your chin, and you took in his appearance quickly. No shirt, thick chain, his favourite hat resting backwards over his brunette locks. He interrupted your wondering eyes by pressing his lips to yours, and you had almost forgotten how perfect his kisses were. Almost. “Best christmas gift I could have gotten.” he kissed you again.

“So, does New York hold you like I do?” he asked playfully, kissing your forehead before looking back down at you.

You shook your head, snuggling back into his chest.

No one could hold you like he could.

tags!

@randomlimelightxxx @chanelwonders @baby-bearie @averysbestyears @g7aesthetic @would-you-tell-me-who-you-are @babyzachyy @jayjaw023

[scullyverse]

Tease

Prompt by @notdeannatroi;

"I know you can be louder than that”

This is my first Stella/Scully smut so I hope it’s okay! I just love them together so much, ugh lol

Also available to read on ao3

“Stella” Dana warned, her eyes baring into Stella’s in the mirror as she lowered her mascara wand to the basin counter so she could place a hand over the hand of Stella’s that was now gently playing with the simple gold ring of her belly button piercing. “You have to work in a few hours. Don’t start something you can’t finish”

Stella/Scully || filth || 2.9k words || Rating E (Explicit for smut. You’ve been warned lol)

Stella would never get tired of seeing Dana like this, standing in her bathroom wearing only her matching lace black bra and panties, Stella’s favourite, as she let the hair dryer flick her long red hair over her shoulders, nearing the final touches of her morning routine. Dana had only stayed the night a few times so far in their relationship as what they had was fairly new, but every time she did, Stella found herself shocked about how much she began to love these moments. Loved just having Dana around her, doing the little things, like waking up in her arms, getting ready for the day or making coffee. Stella secretly loved the domestic nature of it all, it had definitely been confronting at first having someone seeming slip so easily through the walls she had built up around herself, but she trusted Dana more than anyone and she knew now that having these moments were something she was beginning to treasure.

“Like what you see detective?”

Stella jumped ever so slightly at Dana’s question, realising she had been caught red handed checking her out and that the hair dryer had stopped a little while ago leaving Dana looking at her through her reflection in the mirror, a smirk on her lips as she used her middle finger to dab on a light smudge of red lipstick across her bottom lip. Returning the smirk, Stella nodded from her place resting against the bathroom door frame before she let her eyes rake back down Dana’s body, taking in every curve and goosebump rise on her skin. She definitely liked what she saw. Biting on her bottom lip, Stella made her way towards the beauty in front of her before she stood behind her, wrapping her arms around her waist, her fingers settling on the flat expanse of Dana’s stomach fingertips barely slipping beneath the fabric resting on Dana’s pelvic bones, her chin resting on her shoulder, watching Dana continue to apply her makeup.

“Mmm I definitely like what I see” Stella moved slightly so her lips made contact with the bare skin of Dana’s shoulder, moving up before she brushed away a loose curl of red hair, letting her lips settle on her neck, giving nips to the strong muscle running down the side of her throat.

“Stella” Dana warned, her eyes baring into Stella’s in the mirror as she lowered her mascara wand to the basin counter so she could place a hand over the hand of Stella’s that was now gently playing with the simple gold ring of her belly button piercing. “You have to work in a few hours. Don’t start something you can’t finish”

Smirking against her skin, Stella held her gaze as she brushed her fingers over Dana’s skin, loving how the muscles underneath them rippled in a shudder of arousal. “Work called when you were in the shower. Turns out I’m not needed until tonight...” Trailing off innocently, Stella let her tongue snake out, tracing patterns on Dana’s neck, loving the slightly bitter taste of her vanilla body wash against the sweetness of her skin. Stella had to admit that night shifts weren’t her favourite now she was getting older, but if it meant she could spend the rest of the morning wrapped up in all Dana had to give her she certainly wouldn’t complain.

Dana’s lips broke into a sly smirk, her pupils dilating slightly as she watched Stella swirl her tongue around her skin, knowing what her tongue could do to other parts of her as well. She pushed her hips back slightly, causing Stella to suck in a breath as Dana’s ass made contact with her groin. Stella chuckled as her hands left Dana’s stomach and fell to her hips, pulling them against her fully her as she felt the lace of Dana’s underwear hit her bare skin between her parted silk robe. Dana’s hips wriggled slightly which caused Stella to pull her roughly against her groin, her lips brushing against Dana’s ear.

“You’re a fucking tease”

“You love it”

Stella chuckled as she tapped her hands on Dana’s hips, turning her around so she could push her against the basin, finally able to kiss that smirk off the red heads face. Pressing her body against Dana’s, Stella moved their lips together, her eyes closing when she felt Dana’s lips part to allow them to deepen the kiss. Even though they had spent most of the night fucking, Stella found her appetite insatiable when it came to Dana and she just couldn’t get enough, especially when she was teasing her dressed in nothing but her favourite lingerie. Using her knee to nudge Dana’s legs apart slightly, she slipped her thigh in between Dana’s, using her toes to push upwards, rewarded with warm heat against her skin. Dana moaned into their kiss, her hand reaching up to slip her hands into the part of Stella’s robe, moving them to cup her ass, pulling her in closer with the digging of her fingers into her bare flesh.

In any other instant Stella would probably feel guilty about dishevelling Dana’s hair after she had spent so much time getting it looking perfect, but the pooling of arousal in her lower stomach and the need to have Dana as close as possible quickly took over. Stella tangled her fingers into the slightly curled red head, her fingernails gently scraping against her scalp as she pulled her closer, pushing their lips harder against each other as she rocked gently, applying pressure to Dana’s centre with her thigh and in turn getting the sweet reward of hearing the soft moans of approval leave her partners mouth.

Stella felt one of Dana’s hands move from her ass, trailing over her skin as she went to reach around her front, causing Stella to quickly reach down and grip her wrist, stopping Dana’s hand just above where she wanted her most. Pulling away from the kiss she shook her head slightly, seeing the confusion in Dana’s eyes. “I want to fuck you”

Dana gave a whine of disapproval as Stella removed her thigh from Dana’s centre which caused Stella to chuckle in her throat, her eyes dropping to the way Dana’s chest rose and fell quickly with arousal, slightly flushed pink against her pale skin. She looked absolutely incredible. Stella traced her fingers down from Dana’s hair, raking slightly down her skin, leaving the faintest of trails as she stopped at her bra, pulling her forwards slightly with a flick of her finger.

“Take it off”

The red head quickly reached behind her to unclasp the material, letting it fall in her hands before she threw it to the bathroom floor, licking her lips as she watched Stella’s eyes fall to her chest with a hunger Dana knew all to well. Stella moaned her approval before she ran her finger down the valley between Dana’s breast, loving how her skin broke out in slight goosebumps and how her dusky pink nipples got harder with her growing arousal. Stella leaned down to place a kiss above Dana’s heart before she reached down to grip her ass, lifting her to sit on the edge of the basin, Dana having to reach out to grip Stella’s shoulders for balance so she didn’t fall back into the sink. Dana instinctively parted her legs, allowing room for Stella to fit between them.

Placing her hands on Dana’s upper thighs, Stella stepped forward so she was flush against Dana, loving how Dana’s legs wrapped around her thighs, locking them together with a grip of her ankles, like she needed any encouragement to stay where she was. Looking up into her eyes, Stella leaned down, her tongue circling one of Dana’s nipples which caused a throaty groan to escape Dana’s mouth, causing her chin to fall to her chest, her eyes never leaving Stella’s as she watched how her skin became wet beneath Stella’s tongue. Dana had never felt such eroticism before her relationship with Stella, never felt such outright lust. Stella loved to watch Dana, loved to see how her eyes darkened or every chew of her bottom lip. Before moving onto the other nipple, Stella gave the wet skin a sharp blow of cold air which caused Dana’s hip to twitch forward a small “Fuck” escaping her lips at the sudden temperature change before one of her hands reached up to tangle in Stella’s hair, pulling her closer to her chest. Stella moaned slightly as she felt Dana’s nails dig into her scalp, her own fingers digging into the skin on Dana’s upper thighs in response. She could feel the heat radiating from Dana’s core as she felt the now slick material rub against her stomach, Dana’s arousal seeping through the thin lace enough to leave wet patches on Stella skin.

“I think you might need a new pair love, these are a bit wet” Stella grinned, pulling away from Dana’s chest as she ran her hands up and down Dana’s thighs, teasing her by slipping to the inside of her thigh on occasion, her head motioning to Dana’s underwear.

“Shut up” Dana chuckled as she leaned forward, pulling her closer as she crashed their lips together again, her arms resting on Stellas shoulders, linking behind her as she used her ankles to pull Stella closer, sighing into the kiss as she finally felt a solid contact to her centre and not just to occasional brush of Stella’s skin. Stella could tell that Dana was getting impatient by the way in which she began to move, trying to get some sort of relief against her stomach. As much as she wanted to tease Dana until she was withering beneath her, Stella was getting impatient too, needing to watch Dana come probably just as badly as Dana want to come herself. It was one of Stella’s favourite things to see. Reaching up to Dana’s hips she gripped the sides of her underwear before she gave a tug. Getting the hint, Dana broke away from the kiss and untangled her arms and legs to allow Stella room to raise her ass slightly, helping Stella ease them off her body, throwing them next to her bra on the bathroom floor.

Stella used the change in position to take a step back, looking how Dana’s body was flushed from arousal, her nipples erect and slightly red and blushed from the attention she gave them earlier and the glimmer of arousal shining between her parted legs, waiting just for her. Dana rested her hands back onto the basin as she watched Stella slip the robe off her shoulders, bunching it in her hands as she put it on the floor, using it as a make shift cushion, providing her a little bit of comfort as she sunk to her knees. The sight of Stella on her knees in front of her caused Dana to bite her bottom lip as a fresh pulse of arousal surge to her clit. Stella wasn’t usually one to get onto her knees like this, but every time she did Dana knew it was the hottest thing she had ever seen. Especially when Stella looked up into her eyes from between her legs, her hands pulling one of Dana’s legs to rest over her shoulder, the other tracing through the small patch of trimmed red curls.

Stella’s eyes fell from Dana’s as she took in the sight before her of Dana’s flushed and dripping core, her outer lips swollen with arousal and she couldn’t stop herself from licking her lips with the anticipation of getting to taste the sweet sharpness that was so distinctively Dana. Giving the inside of Dana’s thigh a quick kiss and nip she used her free hand to part her lips, exposing her clit before she nuzzled it with her lips and gave it a kiss causing Dana’s fingers to shoot to her hair, holding her head gently against her, silently begging her not to stop. Stella closed her eyes as she began a rhythm of what Dana liked best, of circles with the tip of her tongue, knowing to drag the length of the flatness of her tongue on occasion before she dipped down, collecting the stickiness of Dana’s arousal on her tongue before returning to circles, repeating the pattern until she heard Dana begin to pant, her toes curling and she would slow back down, looking up at her with hooded eyes, watching how close she teetered to the edge. Dana gripped her hair a little harder in frustration as she looked down, her tongue poking out of her mouth and resting on her bottom lip as she watched Stella smirk with satisfaction between her legs.

“Fucking tease”

The way in which Dana’s voice always dropped that extra octave when she was this turned on caused a sharp stab of arousal to hit Stella’s own core, gripping her own legs a little tighter together to give herself some relief. Stella began her rhythm again, collecting the wetness that seeped down from Dana’s entrance before she brought her tongue back up to her clit, this time bringing it between her lips as she sucked, causing a breathy “Yes” to escape Dana’s lips as she let her head fall back, hitting the mirror behind her gently as she brought her free hand up to her own breast, brushing her nipples in time with Stella’s ministrations between her legs. Seeing movement, Stella’s eyes locked onto Dana’s fingers dancing over her breasts before she used the lapse of Dana’s focus to enter her with two fingers which caused Dana’s hips to nearly lift off the basin in surprise, her fingers pulling roughly at Stella’s hair. Her mouth parted in a silent gasp as Stella began a steady thrusting rhythm, her voice escaping her as she felt her inner walls begin to flutter around Stella’s fingers.

Stella pulled away a little for breath as she nipped at Dana’s outer lips once before she watched Dana’s hips begin to shake slightly. She could tell she was close with how Dana’s walls were gripping her fingers and how her brows were scrunched together in pleasure. But Stella wanted to hear her.

“I know you can be louder than that”

Stella’s lips brushed against Dana’s clit before she curled her fingers, hitting the soft spot inside of her which she knew Dana loved. Dana gave a loud moan as she began to pant, and licked her lips feeling her orgasm rapidly approaching her with every quickly thrust in and out of her and every suck of her clit.

“Oh god, fuck-“ Dana quickly sat up straighter as she reached down, both of her hands gripping in Stella’s hair, her legs parting as much as they could as she began rocking against Stella’s mouth. Dana was trying not to smother Stella too much but she felt her restraint snap when Stella entered her with a third finger and she sucked in a strangled gasp before stuttering “I’m c-coming!”

Stella thrust faster as she felt Dana’s orgasm crash over her, slowing only slightly when she felt Dana’s walls contract around her fingers, her clit pulsing rhythmically under her tongue as Dana let out a loud squeal, her toes curling tightly and her thighs shaking around her head. Stella slowed her movements, allowing Dana to ride out her orgasm with the gentle rock of her hips and shudder of muscles around her fingers. Once the grip was released on her hair, Stella pulled away for a much needed gasp of air as she gave her clit gentle kisses, smiling when Dana’s hips twitched with over sensitivity. Easing her fingers out, Stella was rewarded with a fresh pool of wetness running from Dana’s entrance. Stella was gentle as she cleaned Dana up, making sure to collect every drop before she rested back onto her heels, giving Dana a lustful smirk as she brought her fingers to her lips. “I knew you could be louder”

Dana giggled breathlessly as she watched Stella clean her fingers, her breath fast and shallow as she tried to come back to her senses, her body feeling completely liquid and heavy. Once she felt stable enough, Dana slipped off the basin to help Stella get to her feet, pulling her into a tight embrace before she pulled back with a shy smile. “I’ve never come so hard in my life”

Stella laughed as she brushed her fingers to Dana’s bottom lip, wiping the smudged lipstick there. “You might have to redo your hair and make up again before work. Unless you want everyone to know you just got fucked” Dana moaned as she took Stella’s finger into her mouth, holding it between her teeth with a smirk, slowly using her body to walk Stella backwards into her bedroom, fully committed to returning the favour with interest.

“I think it’s only going to get worse once I’m finished with you so why bother now.” Pausing as they reached the unmade bed, sheets still tangled from the night before, Dana pushed Stella back against the mattress, crawling on top of her before she gripped Stella’s wrists, holding them above her head before she leaned down to whisper in her ear.

“Besides, I want to see how loud you can be as you come”

[jeonggukingdom]

splinters of love •  day XVII [myg]

pairing  ⟶ min yoongi x fem!Reader

summary  ⟶ a collection of drabbles (one for each day of April) based on prompts by an online prompts’ generator site. Specifically  ⟶  • day XVII ↳ in which Yoongi feels lonely and decides to text a random number in search of a friend and you are the one at the other end of the line.

genre  ⟶ fluff, a little tiny bit of crack, a drop of angst

rating  ⟶ G

word count ⟶ 1.832 words

warnings  ⟶ there are mentions of depression the first part of this drabble so if it triggers you, avoid it please! The rest might give you cavities instead so be ware lol

series masterlist  ⟶ here  (links on mobile may not work, if you’re looking for all the works in this series, you can click on the “!splintersoflove” tag and you’ll find them all there!)

His eyes fix on the world outside his window, the silence of his apartment enveloping him whole.

It’s one of those nights when he feels heavy inside and so desperately alone it is almost hard to breathe.

The sky is black and littered with little shining stars and usually, the sight would soothe his aching heart, put him at peace enough for him to fall asleep like this.

Tonight, though, it feels different.

He yearns for the human touch, the words of affection or even more simply, some company.

But he has none of those because he chose this for himself. He cut ties with everyone in his life, he moved to a city far away from his own and then, he avoided making friends or falling in love, too afraid of his heart being shattered again if he did, just like it happened in the past.

Most of the times, Yoongi is pretty fine with this but there are nights much like this very own that he simply cannot rest, cannot function knowing how flat, lonely and simply sad his life is.

On nights like these, he wonders if he really made the right choice, if it really worked to keep his heart to himself and save it from other people. After all, isn’t his heart aching still?

His fingers quiver as he picks up his phone to seek refuge in the distraction of social media in whatever form available but even that feels suffocating tonight.

Everyone looks happy or in love or surrounded by friends or maybe it just does because he yearns for these things, so much so he cannot see through the cracks, through the lies reflected into pictures online that reflect only a fraction of the reality surrounding someone else’s life.

He heaves out a sigh, closes his eyes and then opens them again to fix them on his screen. He doesn’t know why he does it but, in an instant, he’s putting in a random string of numbers onto his phone and sending it the most basic and stupid text he has ever sent in his entire life.

[3:05 AM] Unknown: Hello

Your phone chimes and you grunt, twist under your covers and reluctantly open your eyes to see who would text you at this ungodly hour.

Your brows furrow at the unknown number displayed on the screen and you would normally toss your phone away and never think about the text ever again but, quite frankly, you are pissed.

This person, whoever that is, woke you up from your deep slumber for absolutely no reason. Oh, you are feral.

[3:05 AM] You: Do you have any idea what time it is???

Yoongi’s mouth opens as he stares at the screen. Not only he actually managed to input an existent number but the person behind the screen actually responded.

His heart is beating frantically in his chest, his breath turning laboured as he sits up on his bed, wets his lips and with trembling fingers, types down his response.

[3:06 AM] Unknown: Yes, fuck, sorry. I… I didn’t think someone would actually respond.

You look at your phone with your mouth agape. Is this person high or something?

You shake your head, close your eyes and try to get back to sleep but after a few minutes, you have to accept the fact that now, you are fully awake and this nuthead is to blame for it.

[3:15 AM] You: Who the hell are you? Do I know you?

Yoongi thought his luck had already run out when you didn’t respond in the next two minutes or so. He had let himself fall back on his bed, trained his eyes on the world outside and just sighed in defeat.

His heart almost jumps out of his chest as his phone chimes and even without looking, he knows it must be you because, pitifully enough, nobody else would text him and especially not at this ungodly hour.

Oh.

He bites his bottom lip, scratches the uncombed top of his head almost as if you were in front of him, scrutinizing him, judging him and his mop of mint hair.

[3:16 AM] Unknown: No, we don’t know each other… Honestly, I was feeling lonely and I tried to text a random number and I really didn’t think anyone would receive it let alone answer it…

You look at your phone, blinking a few times as if by doing that the words written there will change but, obviously, they don’t and before you know it you are laughing at the absurdity of it all.

Should you believe this stranger? Or is this some type of scam of some sort that you are simply too-sleep-deprived to see through? What if this is a stalker or something?

Against your better judgment, you text them back.

[3:19 AM] You: You are crazy.

Yoongi laughs at the text, nods his head a couple of times in agreement because honestly, who in their right mind texts a random stranger in the night seeking for company? Nobody.

Well, apparently, him.

[3:19 AM] You: Well, I don’t think I’m going to fall asleep anytime soon thanks to you so…What’s your name?

He blinks a few times, baffled by the fact that you are still playing along, giving him the attention he was yearning for so easily… he wonders if you are a teenager or something, naive and unaware of the dangerous world outside.

[3:20 AM] Unknown: Yoongi… yours?

[3:20 AM] You: ________.

[3:20 AM] You: Crap, should have used a fake name… are you a creep or something?

[3:21 AM] Yoongi: Would I tell you if I were, though? Lol

[3:21 AM] You: You may have a point, lonely stranger. Oh well, I guess I’ll just have to trust you… but just so you know I own a taser and I’m not afraid to use it.

Yoongi laughs at your words and he fails to notice how his heart grows bigger in his chest, how the smile is permanent on his lips as he is talking to you. He fails to notice how his body relaxes naturally the longer he text you like this, gets to know you a tad bit more.

This random stranger… You feel impossible to him, like a dream and that’s why he wants to keep this moment closer, cherish it while it lasts so that it can soothe his loneliness, placate his rattled mind even if it’s just for one night.

You talk and talk and it’s weird but natural at the same time and he barely notices how the sky switches from black to bright orange and later, into cerulean blue because the entire time, his eyes are fixed on the screen, on you.

[6:55 AM] You: Lonely boy, you have officially kept me awake the entire night… I’m gonna be a zombie at work thanks to you ç.ç

[6:55 AM] Yoongi: Oh, I didn’t notice it was so late already

[6:56 AM] Yoongi: I’m sorry? XD

[6:57 AM] You: What a sincere apology -.-”

[6:57 AM] Yoongi: I don’t have much else to offer, you know? Ahah

[6:58 AM] You: Well, shouldn’t you at least try to make it up to me???

[6:58 AM] Yoongi: Ok, how do you suggest I do that, exactly?

[6:59 AM] You: I don’t know, just figure it out, lol

Yoongi bites his bottom lip, his heart beating really fast in his chest while he feels absolutely euphoric, delirious even but also incredibly stupid because what is all of this?

What the hell is he even doing? Throwing outside the window all of his precautions as if they meant nothing before last night?

With the sun up in the sky rationality seeps back in, shakes him from the bubble he had been living in the entire night and just like that, he wavers.

[7:30 AM] You: Woah, you thinking that hard about it? I was half-kidding anyways, you know?

His silence feels weird. Which is odd because you’ve spoken for what, three hours and you already miss him? It feels absolutely nuts, just as much as last night does now as you get out of your pajamas and slip on your work clothes for another day at the office.

[7:45 AM] You: You passed out or something? Well, I gotta go to work… it was fun talking to you.

The hours pass and he doesn’t text you back. Not in two hours, not in four, not in six and you don’t even know why you care so damn much but a little tiny part of you wonders what might have scared him away when he was the one seeking the company in the first place.

You exhale loudly as you close the door behind your back, get yourself out of those damn heels and simply relax on your couch while sipping on a glass of red wine, your favourite.

Just then, your phone chimes.

[9:10 PM] Yoongi: Hey…

[9:10 PM] You: Ring the bells, he lives!

[9:10 PM] Yoongi: Sorry for disappearing… I… had a lot on my mind.

[9:11 PM] You: You don’t have to justify yourself with me, Yoongi-ssi. We don’t even know each other.

He grimaces at your words because stupidly enough, it feels like you do know each other. Hell, he is certain you know him more than anyone else in his life as of now does which is of course extremely sad but nonetheless the utter truth.

Your words sting but he knows they are somewhat true to you and that he deserves them.

He crashed into your life uninvited and then disappeared just as fast.

He had made up his mind that he was going to let all of this go early this morning but now, he wavers again and before he can stop himself, he does something he would have never imagined.

[9:13 PM] Yoongi: I’d love to change that, though. I know this might sound crazy and you’re free to say no of course but… I’d like to meet you. Like, in person.

A small smile stretches on your lips as you open the picture he sent you last night. He looked adorable under his white covers with his tangled hair, sleepy eyes and pouty lips and you had immediately tried to ignore the way your heart rate increased just a little bit while looking at his selfie.

You also tried to ignore how it started beating even faster when he called you cute when you sent one in return but now, as you look back at his photo, you can’t ignore any of those signs and before you can stop and think about what you’re doing, your fingers tap on the screen your response.

[9:15 PM] You: Thought you’d never ask, lonely boy.

Copyright © 2020 by jeonggukingdom. All rights reserved. Do not repost, do not steal, do not translate without consent.

[kpopchangedme]

Im Jaebeom | Pregnancy!au [M]

Jaebeom read so many baby-related books he's forgotten how to enjoy some simple pleasures... (Oh, and you are obviously cranky and hormonal but he knows better than to tell you that!)

Protagonists: Im Jaebeom & You

Word Count: 2.4k

Genre: NSFW - Newly Weds - Romance - Angst - Pregnancy - Pregnancy sex- Smut || [Drabble 2k]

Prompts: “I can’t help the fact that I’m so goddamn moody all the freaking time” + “Should have gotten a puppy.” [Anon]

Lyly's note: Is this sexy pregnancy!au worthy of Things I Wish I Knew or what? lol. Pregnant ladies, go get some! ;)

GOT7 | M.list

You let out a loud swear, stepping on a phone charger someone has somehow abandoned in the middle of the living room. It freaking hurts, like a tiny torture device, tore the sensitive skin of your foot. Of course, when you sit on the couch to examine it, it looks perfectly fine. 

“Should've gotten a damn puppy,” You curse again under your breath, unreasonably livid. 

Instantly, the guilty party's head pops out of the doorframe to his office. “Honey!” Jaebeom considers you from head to toe in outrage, “The Shrimp has ears.”

That's his thing now that the third-semester started; obsessing about auditory development and what the baby is able to hear. Swears, news coverage of dramatic events and loud quarrels are strictly prohibited. He plays music whenever he has the chance, boasting about how you are growing a music whiz. 

Ever since he read his first damn pregnancy book, Jaebeom turned into a helicopter daddy-to-be, always hovering to make sure you are doing everything right. At the end of the third prenatal visit, he decided on moving his whole studio at home to work and mommysit – as he calls it.

By the time he was done with the fourth pregnancy book, you felt like nothing but an incubator to his spawn. That's not exactly what you wished your first year of life together would feel like. But then again, you didn't plan on getting pregnant on your honeymoon, the first time you two ditched contraception. It happened very fast. Everyone called it a blessing and you did too for a while, you were elated. Right until you started to lose your hair and struggle with acne like a damn teenager… Now it varies daily, you are either excited or scared shitless, in high spirits or easily irritable, you can't tell before it shifts. Overbearing, Jaebeom has gotten better than yourself at reading your daily disposition.

When you glare at him, he straightens worryingly in the doorframe, partly to blame for your current mood. “Don't look at me!” You snap in exasperation, still rubbing the sole of your aching foot. “Can you stop looking at me like that?”

He risks taking a few steps in your general direction, expertly assessing the situation, “Like what?”

"Like I’m a ticking bomb; like I'm gonna start yelling at you any second!” Freezing in the middle of the place, he presses his tongue to his cheek. You are almost shouting, but he knows better than to point that out.

“I’m not,” Jaebeom comes to sit by you guardedly. He makes sure not to maintain eye contact for too long, as though you're a dangerous fickle animal. "Did you hurt yourself?"

You hiss threateningly at the question but he still reaches for your perpetually bloated foot. Gently, he massages it, flashing you a dumb innocent smile. Still sullen, you at least allow him to do that much.

Fine, you do not completely hate having your man work from home. 

“I can’t help the fact that I’m so goddamn moody all the freaking time...” 

“Moody?” You cross your arms over your chest and Jaebeom chuckles, shaking his head. “You're the living definition of serene honey... You're the best. I love you.”

“Shuddup.” Groaning at the fake compliment, you offer your second foot after a minute of pampering, slightly appeased. “Stop trying so hard, it turns me into a cliché bitch.” You don't miss Jaebeom’s grimace at the word, but he isn't brave enough to correct you again. “Tell you what, if the baby's first word is a swear... I’ll do everything you ask of me for a year.”

"Everything? A whole year?” Raising his eyebrows suggestively, Jaebeom leans in for a lengthy kiss. “You know I can't say no to a promise like that. I would abuse that power, I’m quite imaginative.” You laugh against his mouth, sliding your arms around his neck for him to linger a little longer. Your hub has one hell of a gift, he can always change your mood, even on the worst days. That being said, you're always in the mood for some sexy time with him lately. You just have limited positions and flexibility. “I might teach the Shrimp your favourite cusses just to win that privilege.”

“You wouldn't dare.”

Laughing, Jaebeom sits back but you follow, managing to climb him without difficulty. It's clear he has started something with his massage, stirred your desire. “I’m not done,” he warns pointlessly, not talking about you, "I'm working hard." He points his chin to the studio, but you don't climb down. There's no way he believes you will let him go back to his office right now.

“Very hard yeah,” chuckling, you pull at the collar of his shirt, “Mister Producer.” He breaks the kiss to get rid of the piece of clothing himself, eager to entertain your favourable disposition. Some sacrifices are harder to make than others, and taking a break from work for quick sex is a no brainer. Your hands roam his shoulders, even after all this time you still can't get enough. “Did you save it?” Nudging your nose to his, you pull away to throw your loose gown over your head. 

Jaebeom groans, already expertly unhooking your bra, “Of course I saved, but I’ll need to get back to it...” His mouth explores your neck and you throw your head back, savouring every single one of his kisses. “Feeling better?” He hums, lightly sucking your skin and you moan. Fine, having your man work from home is the best damn thing that ever happened to you. At your natural response, Jaebeom cups your swollen breasts, thumbs rubbing circles on your areolas. 

“Shit.” Instantly, he shushes in disapproval making you laugh. You lean into him as much as your 29 weeks belly allows. “I can't help myself, I'm too sensitive.”

“I can see that baby,” Jaebeom marvels as his constant stroking of your nipples makes your thighs jerk. “I read third-semester’ orgasms are incredibly intense...” You rise to your knees to slide his fleece jogger pants down, smoothly freeing his erection. These darn books sure reveal some useful information sometimes… “What do you think?”

“Oh, how would I possibly know that?” He stops altogether, freezing under you at the joke. Barely two days prior, you finished twice before he did – very expressively – but still, he hesitates. For a man as skilled as he is, it sure is easy to make him question himself. Jaebeom is contemplating his life, a dubious look on his face when you take his cock in your palm. His eyes shut, goosebumps spreading on his body at your touch. Smirking, you stroke him leisurely, “I guess you’ll have to keep working hard so we can find out.” You say that but really, you’ve been so hypersensitive lately, he could make you reach your high without even trying.

“You know...” Opening his eyes lazily, Jaebeom frowns; “I'm not sure how I feel… About the Shrimp is hearing all our sexy talk...” It's your turn to stop everything.

Oh no, he did not just say that… Not after all the stuff he put you through!

“I swear to God, Im fucking Jaebeom! I let you have your way until now; I gave up caffeine, cheese and fish…” Suddenly livid, you start checking things off of your fingers. “You are worried of dumb stuff you read about despite the doctor's best opinion... So, I let you hire a cleaning service; I stopped driving myself around and dyeing my hair; I allowed you to post our ultrasounds all over your socials; I didn't say anything when you sent the cats away to your mom's…” His mouth is open in awe as you angrily go on. He's clearly racking his brain to find out what he said wrong. Him and his stupid pregnancy obsessions. “But this... This is where I draw the fucking line Jaebeom. If you stop making love to me because it creeps you out... Honest to God, I will murder you. I don't care what the baby hears. The doctor said it was safe. I want sex, I need sex. Give me sex, or I'll destroy you.”

“Honey,” Jaebeom bites his lips, struggling to conceal his amusement, “I wasn’t saying we should stop. It doesn't bother me like that...” His right palm rubs your lower back in repetition to ease you. “I was just wond–”

“I don't care what you wonder about,” you interrupt, still down, “just do me.”

Before Jaebeom can fully laugh at you flaring over nothing again, you're kissing him roughly, intended on getting your way. Wriggling under you to get to a better angle, he doesn't seem too affected, simply enjoying the hormonal rollercoaster ride. One of the actual perks of your pregnancy is being in the mood quickly and it's more than just your desire, it's physical too. Something that is undeniable when his hand finds its way between your legs. You're ready for him already, wet and messy. Though you rock into his palm briefly, there's only one thing on your mind right this instant. 

You don't want to wait any longer to feel him inside you. You use Jaebeom's shoulder as a fulcrum to position yourself, raising on your knees and he helps, holding his cock as you gradually sink down. Once you're sitting back on him on the couch, filled, you pause, dropping your forehead to his. Eye to eye, out of focus, Jaebeom pecks your lips tenderly. His hands caress your belly on their way to the side of your thighs. That's enough to make you soft all over again. The power that man holds over you knows no limit. Careful, you rise, rocking your hips forward to add friction before sliding back down. This lazy back and forth goes on for a while and every time you fall down and your ass meets his thighs with a clap, you feel like breaking. 

“Okay?” Jaebeom mumbles, using his strength to firmly guide you upwards. You're thankful for his help because you're heavy and tired. You nod, letting out a weird throaty sound when he fills you up once more.

Jaebeom chuckles, entertained by your acute senses and unusual reactions. Sliding on the large couch to lay, he makes sure you follow closely, riding him. From this position, he can take better control, raising his hips to slam into you. You coo when he does, hovering above to let him have his way. You're already too taken by so little. There's a gentle thud in your belly at the shift of position but Jaebeom doesn't seem to feel the baby stir, awakened by your unrest. Thank God, because the last thing you want right now is for him to stop or slow down. It's not something abnormal or new at all, but now that the baby's movements are getting more noticeable from the outside, you wouldn't be surprised if it messed up with Jaebeom's sexy groove. In the dark, he picks a swift pace, thrusting faster but lighter, making sure to stretch this moment for as long as you both can.

Yet, you're shaky and unfocused, unable to calm yourself. Way too fast, you come undone, overwhelmed by the friction and pleasure. Ecstatic, you drop on your hands, on all fours, as your intense orgasm washes through you. Aware you're peaking already, Jaebeom maintains his rhythm, breathlessly laughing at your shortage of stamina. Sure, he was right, pregnancy orgasms are amazing but they also come almost unannounced and are ridiculously exhausting.

Losing the smile, Jaebeom frowns in concentration, probably trying to finish too. After a whole minute, you're still being carried by your own paroxysm, core quavering when his hips halt altogether. Sighing deeply, he cums in spurts inside you, letting go probably more hastily than he would have wanted to. He's a team player. He knows you won't be able to handle him for long after oversensitivity hits you.

Afterwards, you both stay like that for a moment – as one – trying to repossess yourselves. Some days, it's like you're an entirely different person. Food doesn't taste the same, you yell at your caring husband over nothing and your orgasms are absurdly drawn-out. 

“Hey,” Jaebeom speaks up after an eternity and you take it as a cue to pull away, letting him fall out of you, “that was very quick. Are you alright, was it good?” Typical of him lately, being so overly concerned, you snort. Reaching for the tissue box on the coffee table, he offers them up so you can clean yourself. Still overpowered, you nod, laying back naked on the couch to do so.

What a sight it must be, a stranded whale in the middle of his living room.

Jaebeom doesn't seem to see that though. Transfixed, he positions himself to comfortably kiss and hold your heavy belly. His fingers linger, tracing patterns over the stretched skin. “What about you Shrimp?” He asks mouth pressed to the bump, tickling. “How are you doing?” Sure enough, the baby rolls, following the sound of his familiar reassuring voice. 

“We definitely woke her up”, you announce casually, grabbing one of his hands to position it better. Now that it's over, hopefully, he won't mind or get weirded out by that idea. “And you’ll need another nickname, we're both getting huge.”

“Sorry,” Jaebeom apologizes with adoration when there's a more obvious kick. To him, his baby girl's tumbling never gets old. To you neither, but it's a different sensation entirely. Whispering in confidence, he adds, “You'll always be a shrimp to me." At the words, you can't help the flutters you feel, not from the baby. When he looks up this time, Jaebeom doesn't seem as apprehensive of your reaction. You're on the magical post-coital cloud of happiness, together. “What?” If it could, your heart would physically expand from emotion at the sight, swelling with unconditional love. As an only answer, you run a hand through his locks and he cutely grins. “Shrimp, I think we're safe for now. I don't think mommy wants to murder daddy anymore...”

“Daddy needs to get over himself,” you dramatically roll your eyes, smiling, “he knows mommy loves him, no matter what…”

GOT7 | M.list

[aqvarius]

Masquerade Kiss: Do Bad Girls Like to Self-pleasure? Kazuomi Shido - otona love - chapter 3 summary/translation

welcome to chapter 3! we left off when kazuomi was at masquerade trying to ask yuzu and kei for advice and naturally they were being dicks. you can read the previous chapter here or  check out my translations page to read from the start.

“so... how to make that “special woman” surrender*...”

*literally raise the white flag

he thinks that if his lovemaking is inadequate to the point where you have to masturbate, it’s completely his responsibility. 

“i had intended to convey in full detail the extent of my overflowing love for her, but it seems that i didn’t do enough”

he thought he knew what you were looking for without having to ask and that maybe it wasn’t a possibility like he expected without having a conversation about it. 

kei: “it’s not that your technique got worse?”

(lmao these guys really say anything to each other, huh)

kei asks him directly while kazuomi is thinking of a strategy for how to make you weak for him** again. 

**literally 骨抜き “debone” lol

kazu: no way. not a chance

kei: you don’t know that. the only way to ascertain that is to confirm it with mc-san herself. plus she’s an agent who can wrap any man she chooses around her finger... acting must be her specialty

“i’m not a man who can’t see through a woman’s acting”

yuzuru: “you couldn’t get it up?” (💀)

kazu: it’s not that. it’s just that she gets sexually frustrated/pent up because we don’t see each other often enough. 

kei: “so you can get it up, but is the problem to do with hardness?”

basically yuzu asked him if he had erectile dysfunction, and then kei is asking if he can get it up but not get hard enough. these dudes literally have zero filter lmao, meanwhile i’m here reading and translating this like

“of course there’s no problem there. who do you think i am?”

i can’t believe yuzu and kei are just sat here questioning kazuomi’s virility lmao ;sldkfsdldjsls

kei: then... could you be stuck in a rut? (basically i think he’s asking if things are getting stale)

kazu: impossible

kazuomi: “... are you guys enjoying this [making fun of me]?” 

yuzuru: “yeah”

kei: “of course”

yuzu and kei have the same pleased smiles on their faces. 

kei: well, speaking seriously, sometimes it’s good to have a change of pace, isn’t it?

kei: “look, there are lots of things like this”

“kei lined up items that “make the night more fun” in a row on the table.”

“eye mask, whip, collar, handcuffs...”

“where did you hide*** this stuff?”

*** 隠し持つ: carrying something undercover 

bruh he literally pulled it out of nowhere like he had all these things on him the whole time they were at the club... 

yuzu: “also, why do you have this stuff on you now...”

kei: i don’t know what’s going to happen. i have to be prepared for everything

kazuomi: as far as i know, situations where you need these don’t occur everyday... 

kei: look, i recommend this one. i just got it recently...

kazuomi: “...no thanks****”

****he’s basically saying something that means something like “i appreciate the sentiment [but no]”, “your feelings [intentions] are enough”

after that, no helpful advice came up in the conversation. but kazuomi notes that both of them seem to be worried. they didn’t gross him out, but he politely refused kei’s favourite goods. 

a few days later, he invites you over for dinner. 

you tell him that you were just thinking of contacting him when the phone call came, which surprised you. kazuomi says “well well, that was good timing.” “aside from that diamond, you didn’t set up wiretap devices or GPS anywhere else, right?” you ask. kazu says if he gets jealous, he might do it sooner or later. 

“after all, my darling lover is in high demand from every direction” 

you: “oh my, i’d be happy if the world’s shido kazuomi got jealous”

basically, i think she’s trying to say here that it makes her happy that the great shido kazuomi would get jealous over her - she’s being a bit cheeky tho. he keeps an eye on your appearance/state while going back and forth with the usual conversation. there’s nothing special/particular about it... he doesn’t feel awkward this time. you’re eating as usual, and laughing at the silly conversations you’re having with him. it seems like there’s nothing strange... 

he says your name. you respond, “eh?” and then:

“with a heavy noise, a wad of bills falls from my hands and lands on the table.” 

at the mountain of bundles of bills that appeared suddenly in front of your eyes, you look taken aback and freeze. “wha...?” you say. 

“what do you want to do with this?” kazu asks. 

you, whose eyes widened for an instant, laugh as you immediately understood that he means it as a challenge. then, you peek into his face, eyes glimmering with mischief. 

you: “okay... i’ll spend [the money] on time with you”

oh? kazuomi says. so, just an hour maybe? you say. even though you’re together like this, you still want his time (time with him). 

“really, what a cutie. you know very well what to say to make me happy”

falskfjls kazuomi is literally LOVESTRUCK he’s so crazy for you. like sure he’s charming and charismatic and smooth but he’s basically a lovestruck Softe teenage boy on the inside for you. 

kazuomi thinks that it’s not just about what words you think will make him happy. when you speak your true feelings, they’re revealed by the expression displayed on your face. that’s why he can’t get enough of you. time spent with him? that might be just what you need. 

at the moment that kazuomi tries to make a date suggestion - 

“but at this rate, is it even possible to buy you for an hour? you’ve been especially busy lately, your time must be pricey, no?” 

you show a lonely expression for just a moment, but before kazuomi could understand the meaning, you laugh and shrug. 

“or whatever. it’s a joke”

“a joke, huh...” kazuomi says. 

“yeah, i don’t think i could buy your time for any amount of money,” you say. “by the way, what is this actually about? a new game?”

“...yeah, something like that,” kazuomi says. 

you immediately withdraw your lonely expression, but on the contrary it shows that there’s “something” up. 

“you're better than anyone at becoming someone else, so when you show me your true face for just a moment, it stirs up my heart” 

;laskjflsd kazuomi why you so cute!!!

kazuomi wonders what the reason was for your lonely face and “that act”. just now, you said you’ll “buy my [kazuomi’s] time” and “my time is expensive because i’ve been so busy lately”. those must be your true feelings, but you’ve had to hide your true face immediately. 

“are you holding back from me?”

“i’ll take in all of your selfishness”

he’s basically saying he’ll indulge her in anything she wants 🥰

“when’s your next holiday?” kazuomi asks. 

“a complete off day. give me a day where you won’t be disturbed neither by work nor your owner*****”

*****owner = the boss. the word used is the word you’d use for like a dog owner/animal keeper lmao

“umm... next week,” you answer. “so... what's the deal?”

“i’m giving you one of my days as a present”

your hand that’s holding a wine glass stops moving as you’re taken aback. 

“you get the right to monnopolise me for the whole day. it’s pretty attractive, right?” 

i love how cocky kazu sounds about all this as if he hasn’t literally been stressing about this for DAYS lmao!!

you: “can you say that about yourself?”

“but why so suddenly... aren’t you busy? you can’t just take a break,” you say. 

“山は越えた“ replies kazuomi, which i think means he’s basically saying that the worst of it has passed already? (literally he’s crossed the mountain). “if the other party is my dear lover, i can adjust my schedule as much as i’d like. and spending a whole day with you won’t cost me, right?”

“...really?” you say. 

“yeah. i swear i’ll make you satisfied with the time.” 

you set the glass down and a happy smile spreads across your face. “i’m looking forward to it,” you say. 

“yeah,” kazuomi agrees. 

“after only just now seeing you smile from the bottom of your heart, i breathed a sigh of relief” 

--

and that’s the end of chapter 3! ;laksdfjl he’s so WORRIED he’ll literally do anything to make you happy~ i’m crying. i love that kazu always pretends he’s so chill and cocky but he’s actually like frantically paddling under the calm surface to make sure you’re satisfied with him and feeling genuinely content and happy, even going as far as to deal with yuzu and kei questioning whether or not he can get erections/get hard enough lmao!!

i’ve set up a ko-fi page here and would be incredibly grateful if you would like to support me for translations and being able to purchase more routes to recap in english!

click here for chapter 4

[seanfalco]

Road Trip: Punk!AU

Fandom: The Witcher Pairing: Punk!Valdo x Punk!Aevryn (oc), Punk!Geralt x Punk! Yennefer, Punk!Jaskier x Reader Word Count: 2963 Rating: T Taglist: @ficsandcatsandficsandcats, @nevadawolfe, @magic-multicolored-miracle, @coffee-and-stories a/n: This installment is really oc heavy sorryyyy.  Also I’m really terrible at writing lyrics, so please forgive my shitty attempt lol.  The next part will be supplied by @ficsandcatsandficsandcats :3

{Part I}{Part II}{Part III}{Part IV}

Part V - If You Need Anyone

Chicago had been fun.  

After her talk with Win, Aevryn felt like a weight had been lifted from her lungs.  She still wasn’t talking with Yennefer, which stung, and Valdo’s request for her to listen to his new album hung over her head, twisting her stomach anxiously, but at least one thing was okay.

I release you.

She’d finished out the rest of the city with a genuine smile on her face, glad that Jaskier had begged for them to stop and have some fun, forgetting her worries for at least a few hours.

Back in Roach Aev sat in the backseat as the others piled in for the night, exhausted, putting her earbuds in as Win’s comforting presence settled next to her.  Leaning against the darkened van window she watched the dark lake shore fly by with the blur of headlights, the city skyline shrinking in the distance, an empty ache settling in her chest.  Valdo’s album was set to drop soon and she didn’t know if she was ready.  

True she’d put on one of his songs the other morning as she’d drove, just to hear his voice, but it had been one she’d heard many times before.  This new album was uncharted territory and she worried it might dredge up more emotions she wasn’t sure if she was ready to face yet; there was still so much to unpack there, things long buried.

Unlocking her phone she opened up her twitter messages, reading them over again when a new message alert popped up.

@valdomarxofficial: Hey, happy birthday, beautiful.  Am I the first to wish you that?  I hope so.

Shit, she swore, eyes flicking up to the top bar of her phone that displayed the time, to see that it was indeed a couple minutes after midnight, July 31st.  Her birthday.

Groaning at the thought of what embarrassing things her bandmates’ were going to attempt to do to celebrate, a slight giddiness filled her chest that Valdo had been the first to remember.

@aeverona: You are, actually.  I’m impressed you remembered.

@valdomarxofficial:  You wound me, love.  How could I forget something so important?  Are you doing anything special to celebrate?

Shaking her head fondly, Aevryn scooted down further in her seat, chewing her lip, fighting back a smile as her fingers flew over the onscreen keyboard.

@aeverona:  you prick, there are a lot of important things you’ve forgotten over the years... but i’m glad you messaged me.  No, we’re just driving right now, everyone’s asleep.

@valdomarxofficial: a shame, you should be the center of attention at a decadent party thrown in your honour.  Perhaps i’ll have to rectify that.  Well, if you have nothing better to do, consider this your birthday gift from me.  x

Attached was a download link from his bandcamp and Aev sighed at the sight.  He really wanted her to listen, didn’t he?

@aeverona: a bit self absorbed, are we?  lol  okay, i give in i’ll listen to it

Taking a deep breath she clicked the link to the download.  While she waited she turned back to the window, pressing her cheek to the cool glass.  She could hear Yennefer’s voice in her head, as if her friend could read her thoughts even now.  Don’t.  How many times are you going to let him hurt you?

She closed her eyes.

—

Yennefer pulled her cardigan tighter around her shoulders as she shifted in the passenger seat, trying to find a comfortable spot while avoiding glancing at Geralt behind the wheel.  The soft music he had turned on had effectively lulled the rest of the van to sleep, but her thoughts swirled, keeping her awake.  

She could sense Geralt’s eyes flicking to her every so often and sighed, sitting up in the seat, unable to will herself to sleep anyway.  Her change in posture signified that she wanted to talk, but an awkward silence fell over them while Geralt merely waited.

“So… what did you and Jaskier do today when we split up?” she asked without looking at him.

Geralt glanced at her, a ghost of a smile tracing his lips for a moment.

“We climbed a rock wall.”

Yennefer jerked in surprise, her dark eyes peering back at Jaskier, snoring softly.  “But he hates heights.”

“I know,” Geralt replied with a soft snort, wanting to say more, though the words died on his tongue.  Silence fell once more.  

Several miles passed.

“What about you and [Y/N]?”  

Yennefer shrugged.  “We rode the carousel and talked.”

“Oh?”

“Yep.”  Yennefer answered simply.  “I got to ride a dragon.”

Geralt snorted in amusement.  “Very you.”

Yen’s answering laugh lifted his spirits, buoying him even as silence fell once more.  At least she was talking to him again.

—

Aevryn startled awake as the van slowed, turning off the highway into a brightly lit truck stop.  Geralt threw Roach into park and got out.  The others stirred slightly, but no one woke.  Aev looked down at her phone.  Fuck, she thought angrily, Valdo’s album list staring her in the face.  She hadn’t meant to fall asleep.  It had only been an hour and a half, but now that she was awake and filled with nervous energy she didn’t think she could just sit there.  

Carefully extricating herself from the depths of the van she slipped out the sliding door, following Geralt into the rest stop.  The usually stoic drummer gave a start when he turned from the cooler, drink in hand, to find her standing right behind him.

“Jesus Aev,” he growled, frowning, stepping around her to go pay.

“Can I drive for a bit, Gery?”  Aevryn asked, quickly grabbing another Red Bull from the cooler before jogging to catch up to him, flashing him a smarmy smile as he grabbed a box of Little Debbie snack cakes.

“Don’t call me that,” Geralt grunted, setting his purchases on the counter.  After a moment he grabbed the giant can out of her hand to set with his stuff before handing the cashier a worn twenty.

“Please?” Aevryn asked.  “If I don’t keep my hands busy I’ll go crazy.  And I need to keep my mind off some… stuff.”

“Hmm.”  

The cashier handed him his change and Geralt handed Aev her drink.  

“You’re not tired?” he asked, giving her a pointed look, his light hazel eyes studying her sharply, knowingly.

“No.”

“Hmm.”  After a moment Geralt nodded and shoved the box of cakes at her.  “Here.  This is for you.”

Aevryn ducked her head to hide her grin as she followed Geralt back to the van, noticing the cakes were mini birthday cakes.

Taking the driver’s seat Aevryn buckled in and stuck her headphones in her ears, not wanting to face a repeat of the other morning as she listened to Valdo’s new music.  If Jaskier happened to wake up and heard it he would flip his shit, and on top of everything else going on, that was the last thing Aev wanted to deal with.  She still didn’t know how she was going to break it to him that she was on speaking terms with her ex again, amongst other things. 

Taking a swig of her energy drink and stuffing one of the snack cakes in her mouth she turned on the first song as she pulled back onto the highway.  

This album is a letter, one I should have written long ago.

Valdo’s low voice in her ear sent an involuntary shiver down her spine and her breath caught at his words, fending off the intrusive thought that he was speaking directly to her before the guitar swelled, leading into the next song and Aev nearly barked a surprised laugh at the opening notes -- a cover of one of her favourite songs.

Not usually one to care for covers, she couldn’t help but admit that it was good; Valdo’s voice filling each familiar lyric with new meaning, and again it felt as though he were singing for her and her alone, a private performance that the masses might peer into, but never truly understand.  The next song was an original one, but again with an easter egg she felt was strangely meant for her to uncover.  Valdo’s haunting vocals were joined by another voice, barking and raspy, and instantly recognizable to Aevryn.

That fucking bastard, she thought, shaking her head in disbelief, though a smile stole across her face like a thief.  He’d just had to go and collaborate with her favourite musician -- one so obscure that not even Jaskier knew she listened to.  Now he was just showing off.  

As she continued to listen, each song had something jump out at her, some lyric that tickled her memory or a reference to some in-joke shared between the two of them as teens, and it was becoming more and more difficult to believe that these were just coincidences.  Looking down at her phone she realized she was already on the final song and that’s when it happened.

The opening notes were accompanied by a lonely piano chord and the instant mood change gripped her, holding her hostage as she listened raptly, her hands tightening on the steering wheel.  Valdo’s voice trembled with emotion, weaving poetry that would certainly steal anyone’s breath away -- personal and raw, but the words hit her like a train, her eyes widening and her mouth falling open.

Darling, it was always you, since day one, I knew, I was smitten, I admit, but it was more than that. After all, ‘just friends’ don’t look at each other like that. ‘Just friends’ don’t kiss each other like that.

It nearly took this immature fuckup too long to realize, What you meant when you said I needed you. And by then it was almost too late. How was I to know you’d need me too? I never told you, when you lay in that hospital bed, unsure if you’d ever wake, It nearly killed me, it drove me mad. Not caring what might become of me I went to his house and I went to bat, I lashed out in hate. Please don’t tell me it was all for nothing...

Her throat suddenly dry, Aevryn swallowed as the song continued on.  

It was her.  It was their life. 

Had he really done that, she wondered, her breath shallow as a memory she’d fought hard to bury surfaced hazily.  When she’d woke in the hospital after telling him why she’d done it, he was lying in the bed with her, his cut lip and bruised knuckles standing out in stark relief now.  She’d never really questioned where they came from before. 

“Oh my God,” she whispered; her hand covering her mouth as her lip trembled and a single tear fell. 

This song was about her, for her.  No, not just this song, she realized -- “this album is a letter…”

As Valdo continued to spin their story, the highs and the heartbreaks, his fuck-ups and regrets -- it broke her anew and soon she was wracked with silent sobs, tears flowing freely down her cheeks til she could barely see the road before her.  

Forgive me Aev, I never deserved you in the first place, but I want to be the man that does.  

In the passenger seat Yennefer stretched, a soft sound catching her attention and she opened her eyes slowly.

“Aev?” she asked softly, noticing her friend in the driver’s seat.  Then she noticed she was crying.  “Fuck, Aev!  What’s wrong?” Yennefer sat up quickly, reaching out to touch Aevryn’s arm.

“That fucking bastard,” she managed to choke out, crying harder and Yennefer quickly glanced in the back to make sure it hadn’t woken anyone else.  Her violet eyes swung back to Aevryn and then noticed the wires going to her ears connected to her phone and she snatched it up, her stomach dropping when she saw what her friend was listening to.

“Aevryn, why?” she demanded, disappointment and anguish thick in her voice.  “Why would you do this to yourself?”

“He asked me to listen to it,” she sobbed.  “It was for me.  The whole damned thing!”

“Aev, I think you need to pull over,” Yennefer urged, anxiously eyeing the sign for the next turn off.

Aevryn nodded and did as she was asked, barely able to see through her tears.  As soon as Roach was stopped, she jumped out, walking swiftly away, though not as if she knew where to.  “Aev!” Yennefer called after her, circling the van to chase after her.

At the slam of the van door Geralt sat up abruptly as the others stirred groggily.

“What was that?  Why are we stopped?” Jaskier asked, looking around, the feeling that something wasn’t right gripping him, waking him faster.  “What’s going on?”

“I don’t know,” Geralt answered, worriedly watching Yennefer take off after Aevryn.

—

“Aevryn!”  Yennefer finally caught up to her friend and grabbed her arm, stopping her in her tracks.  “Talk to me, please,” she begged.  She’d never seen Aev look so lost.

Wiping her jacket sleeve across her damp face, Aevryn sniffled, trying to calm her breaths.  “I knew you’d tell me not to listen to it, but… but I did.  I couldn’t help it.  I had to know why he wanted me to hear it so badly.  And I know now.  It was for me.  It was his apology.  The whole fucking thing.  He even released it on my fucking birthday.”

Yennefer gaped at her, unsure how to respond.  If what she said was true… well, it certainly sounded exactly like something Valdo would do; he was nothing if not that extra.

“Just… just listen to the last song,” Aevryn exclaimed, holding out her phone.  Wordlessly Yen took it and put the earbuds in her ears.

It felt like an eternity elapsed as Aev waited, Yennefer’s face an unreadable mask as she listened.  When it was done Yennefer took a deep breath and pulled the headphones from her ears.

“I must admit he certainly has gone to lengths to get his point across.”

“I still love him, Yen,” Aevryn said softly.

“I know,” Yennefer replied simply, holding her arms out.

With a soft sob Aev surged forward and Yennefer wrapped her arms around her, letting her cry against her chest, her fingers combing through her friend’s messy hair til she was all cried out.

“I want to make it work,” she said thickly through the remnants of her tears.  “I want to give him a second chance.”

“I know,” Yennefer murmured soothingly, her heart twisting with hope and fear for her friend.  She knew all she could do now was support her in her decision.

“I’m so sorry Yen,” she exclaimed, tears running down her cheeks once more.  “I don’t want us to fight anymore.  I want you to look after me.”

“I will always look after you.  You know that.”  Yen’s voice shook as her arms tightened around Aevryn.  That was how Geralt found them and Yennefer raised her eyes meeting his silent gaze as she gave Aev one last squeeze before stepping back.

“I need to call him,” Aevryn murmured absently, glancing over her shoulder to throw an imploring look at Geralt before directing it at Yennefer, who knew what she was asking of them wordlessly.

“Don’t worry about the others,” Yennefer said, smoothing Aevryn’s hair with her hands.  “We’ll be waiting at the van.”

With a nod Aev watched Yennefer and Geralt head back and she waited for them to pass out of sight before pulling her phone out.  Despite the hour she had a feeling that Valdo was waiting for her call and sure enough the phone only rang once before he answered.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” Aev whispered, her voice trembling.  “I listened to it.”

“Yeah?”  Valdo asked, the hope in his tone unmistakable.

“Yeah.  You fucking asshole, you could have warned me,” she exclaimed, though there was no heat in it.  “Did you mean it -- everything you said in there?  You’re being absolutely serious?”

“Serious as a heart attack, babe.”

“Please don’t joke right now, Valdo.”

“I’m not.”  She could hear him breathe, a shaky sound that rattled her own chest.  “Can I see you?”

“Yeah.  I’d like that,” Aev answered, a small smile tugging at her lips.

—

“Yen, Geralt, what the fuck is going on?  Is Aev okay?”  Jaskier demanded as his bandmates walked side by side back to Roach.  You and Win were both out of the van as well, worry gripping you as Jaskier’s tension bled into you.  

“She’s alright,” Yennefer answered as Geralt clapped a hand to Jaskier’s shoulder as he passed.

“But-but what’s going on?” he asked, the helplessness in his voice twisting your heart.

The sigh that left Yennefer’s lungs was heavy with the secrets she couldn’t yet tell him.  For it truly wasn’t her place to tell Jaskier, though she also didn’t like keeping him in the dark.  Beside Valdo he was Aevryn’s oldest friend.

“She listened to something that made her a little emotional and I didn’t want her to crash the van because she was crying.”  

It technically wasn’t a lie.

“What did she--?” Jaskier cut off before finishing his question, his lips twitching into a frown.  “Aevryn…” he grumbled, something akin to exasperation creeping into his voice as he closed his eyes.

Just then she walked back to the van, stopping next to Yennefer, looking rather small.  “I’m okay now.  I’m sorry for worrying everyone,” she said softly, not quite meeting Jaskier’s gaze before climbing back into the van.

“Jask?” you asked, slipping your hand in his as you looked up at him.

He watched his friend, worrying his lip, clear blue eyes cloudy with worry and hurt.  “If what I think is happening, I’ll kill him.”

[atinytokki]

Here’s my first impressions (aka this is what 2020 is gonna sound like folks)

Alright so I’m really behind today, as some of you know I literally just got back from vacation and it’s also my first day of classes this semester and it’s just craziness. Yes I’m posting the first chapter of Yeosang’s spin-off today. But people seemed to like my first impressions of the last album so I’m going to do them again. Thankfully (?) this album is a lot shorter so I can pause and talk about stuff.

Warning! a loooong post, squealing, incoherent thoughts smashed together, and crying ahead. A lot of crying. Keysmashes included.

Post-MV thoughts before I listen to it again: There’s way too much to focus on and I’ve watched it many many times to look at the choreo and the storyline stuff that’s happening, but this is my first time listening without the video so I’ll notice more musically this time. But first I wanna say; YEOSANG’S LINES!!!! I’ve been screaming for forever that he has a beautiful deep voice and needs to be given parts that compliment it. And wow it finally happened :’) Anyway here we gooo

건배하자 like a thunder!! Can you believe they literally spoiled the entire hook of their next song in Beginning of the End? *flashbacks to my utter confusion when that happened* San sounds amazing and I like the little echoey thingies. Gives it a real nostalgic feel. Jongho already popping off vocally barely 10 seconds in. Mingi’s rap here and the transition to Hongjoong’s— rap line goals. The attitude in that mm-mm made me smile ngl. This prechorus might be my favourite part of the song. Seonghwa sounds heavenly. An EDM drop bringing back that hook, good decision and again it kinda feels nostalgic?? Especially the oh-oh-ohs which are also giving me a pirate drinking song vibe wow 0.0 Wooyoung with that 불러 불러 lol. Yes the Yeosang part!! I love a good post-chorus switchup and he. handled. it. perfectly. There’s even harmony, yall know how much I love harmony. And SINGING RAPPERS AHAHDJAHAK YESSSSS. Back to that glorious prechorus but it’s Yunho’s turn. This chorus is just such an anthem. I’m bopping rn. San in this bridge— he said I am a VOCALIST listen to my beautiful VOICE. Yay the rappers going back and forth again!! It’s like If Without You. Man I can’t believe I get to replay this song forever. 2020 is gonna be lit. You hit those notes Jongho! I’m always blown away by this kid, and that scoop earlier mmmm. Just nodding very energetically right now. Perfect end to the song. 100/10!!!!

Okay I’m pausing before the next one starts because no I am not prepared. It’s just like last time; I know Hongjoong wrote this and I know it’s gonna ruin me but I have no idea how and when and what it’s even gonna be like but anyway, too bad, let’s just go.

Oh kinda futuristic sounding opening with the synths? Yooo the vocal thingy in the background, sounds like a sample of some kind, that is super cool and I hope we get more of it. Ok I paused just to write that, let me unpause. This is gonna be a long one, I can already tell, sorry guys 😅 And the beat changed right before the vocalists came in. definitely a back and forth thing here in two registers, very sweet. Wow. WOW MINGI WOW. This rap is?? It sounds super mature and idk just full of confidence. I’m shook. Ok the chorus. Holy cow this is LIT lit. Nope nope I need to pause and go back. This is so chaotic, I feel like I’m missing things?? I’m listening to that chorus again because there were so many elements there. I just wanna take this song and break it down second by second to hear every single sound hahahah. I’m only catching an odd word or two here as far as lyrics go. Oml harmonies 💆🏻‍♀️ Alright Hongjoong’s rap. OMG if he sounded sassy in Answer this is a whole new level and I LOVE IT. Flow is 100/10. The “are you gonna take me there” gives me chills. This song needs a dance this chorus is TOO LIT. Am I at a rave rn??? Oh thank God the bridge took it back a level. Ok I’m pausing because I think I caught some of the lyrics this time. If I’m not wrong I heard 난 궁금해 저 끝이 궁금해, 더 가까이 조금 더 가까이 ? Which is something like “I wonder, I wonder about the end. Closer, a little bit closer” if I heard correctly. I need to look up the lyrics in full later because Hongjoong has a big brain and his lyrics are always 🤯🤩 Ok unpause. Final breakdown! Yep this is going on repeat the rest of today. Jongho yussss with the ad libs. No it’s over ㅠㅠ Alright this one is already vying for top spot this album. We shall see. But I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. HONGJOONG GENIUS.

Um so yeah I saw them perform this live for their anniversary thingy and cried so this should be fun. At least I already know the song so how much can it hurt me? 🤷🏻‍♀️

Smart of whoever put this album together to stick this song right in the middle and make us cry between head banging to the other songs. Mingi in the beginning is just 💖💕💘💝💓 San ballad king. I need more ballads from him. Jongho, of course, with perfect vocal control. Oh Seonghwa too, I need more ballads from him. Wooyoung with T H A T part. A tear is forming, I just love this chorus. People are saying the song should be in a drama and I 100% agree. Everyone together FOREVER YOU ARE MY STARRR. The little drum frills it’s so cute :(( Yay Hongjoong, and his cute little voice I’m UWUWU. Wooyoung with the high note and I’m ascending........... Chorus again and this is the real meaning of crying in the club. It just occurred to me that the second verse seemed really short. Yeosang + Hongjoong + that guitar in the bridge is *chef’s kiss*. This is so emotional, do we really need to do this at 4am?!? I’m just gonna vibe for a sec, it’s the last chorus. The ad libs were so perfect and the way it ended— wow. I need a moment.

From my understanding this is a full version of the Precious Overture they gave us last album. Tempted to go back and see my first impressions about that one, but either way i have a distinct feeling my wig is about to be snatched. Let’s GOOO

So far, it’s starting the same. Creepy humming and all. Okay scratch that, we have a vocal melody. Yunho sounds great ugh I’m so proud. Sorry, San’s voice just takes me to another plane of existence or something, how can it be that smooth and gorgeous, someone please explain. Building to something now... Oo. OO?! Hongjoong’s rapping. This is so cool oh wow, and into this vocal part which I believe is the chorus?? wOW wow it’s amazing to hear this having already heard the bgm, this is like a new level of appreciation. It really all goes well. Ah we have a switch up now with Seonghwa. guys GUYS GUYS you know how I feel about switch ups. Sorry I’m going back to catch something. The tempo changed here and really grabbed my attention. The bass is also super cool, it’s actually the same melody as the treasure opening (and the opening of this song) but much lower, I believe. Uh oh guys this might be vying for top spot too. Let’s continue. Ok Mingi’s rap which I’ve already heard. Um I’m confused now. It’s Hongjoong’s rap again? Is this the chorus?? Woah woah hold on I gotta pause. Because. Wait, what?? This is the chorus??!? Yoooooooo bold move! I have no idea what is going on but I love it. Continuing on. Ah yeah ok the vocal part with Yeosang again, so I guess the rap + vocal part is the chorus? Also I neglected to mention but Yeosang is killing this song. Ooh okay this bridge is building some suspense. Feeeelingggggg.... And now a shouted version of the rap for the final chorus. Okay wow I’m impressed that they took it this direction. And Jongho with the ad libs is PERFECTIONNNN. Oop okay they’ve added the revised-lyric Treasure part to the end here. And the lyrics are the same as in Precious (Overture) so I’m guessing we still didn’t find the treasure, good grief. How long is it gonna take to find this treasure 😅. And it ended like that. Well. WOW. Again, I could listen to this on repeat all day. Again, I am deceased. Instant fave.

I’m pretty sure this is the exact same as I already heard on the trailer thingy but we are gonna react to it anyway.

The orchestra really loosens my tear ducts like nothing else. It’s beautiful, who else is doing it like them?? “Did you find your treasure?” Yes, I found ATEEZ 🥺. The way he says “finally found it” . This is Maddox btw. Also about Maddox, hang on I’m gonna pause for a PSA: guys if you don’t know Maddox please PLEASE check him out. He’s doing the amazing narration on this (and Intro too), he’s a soloist under KQ and one of Ateez’s hyungs who they look up to. In addition to his superior narrating talents, he is also an amazing vocalist. If you like R&B and lo-fi music I would definitely recommend him, he just dropped a single called Color Blind, his insta is xxmaddox, he’s a great guy and YEAH that’s all for my plug but go stan him, he is deserving and proof of the fact that KQ artists are talent through and through. Unpausing! The way the orchestra swells and then goes into a piratey sounding theme is so motivating and familiar :))) “Can you hear those voices?” HNGJRKSNDN WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE SCARY. This is the Epilogue, it’s supposed to be like the denouement, the falling action!! The bad guys should be gone now! What’s next?? Treasure Ep: Answer to Question? Because that’s what I have after this album! More questions!!! Anyway, the bass here and the humming 👌🏻 100/10 for the instrumental. And in ATEEZ fashion, they leave me thirsting for more.

So that was my first impression/live reaction to the mini album! I think it’s Horizon and Precious fighting for #1 currently. Maybe I’ll reblog with second and third and fourth impressions... Thanks for reading if you got this far! And tell me what your first impressions were and if I missed something big while I was keysmashing. TTFN~

[stevie-writes-the-pain-away]

Alcoholics Anonymous - Chapter Six

       I pushed my hair back as I brushed my teeth, straightening my clothes and adjusting my name tag. I always hated my preparation routine for work. It might have only been a change of clothes plus tidying myself up, but it took up so much of my energy. It sounds pathetic to some, I know, but simply living drained me enough. I put my toothbrush back and ran my fingers through my hair as I hurried towards the front door. I picked up my drawstring bag and left into the hallway, locking the apartment up behind me.

               I had a shift at a small convenience store down the street. It was my least favourite of the three part time jobs I worked considering how loud and crammed it was. We got many young customers since the building sat so little ways away from a secondary school down the street, so I had to deal with a lot of inconsiderate preteens. Not to mention how easy it would be to get robbed so I'd spend hours stocking shelves in fear until my coworker came in for their shift and I'd go on break.

        As I walked into the staff room I took out a snack bar from my bag, as well as my phone. Looking at my notifications I blinked, confused.

       "Busy tonight?" It was Cassidy.

       As much as I hated rejecting her offers, I couldn't waste any more time partying that week. "Got a shift tonight, sorry"

       "Come on," I read alongside an irritated emoticon. "You're always working, lighten up."

       "I have rent to pay, Cass," I answered with a smile.

      "Isn't three jobs a little unnecessary though?" I rolled my eyes. Sure, three jobs was a lot to juggle, but I was part time and she had her own full time job. She wouldn't understand.

       "I'm not successful like you lol."

       "Tru." I slightly winced at her response. I knew I didn't have the right to considering I pulled that self-deprecating joke on myself upon my own free will, but I guess I wasn't expecting her to answer so bluntly. I stopped complaining and began typing.

       "I digress, I'm busy, sorry."

       "Suit yourself."

       I reminded myself that I felt bad for shutting her down. She was one of my only friends and she was trying to help me but time after time I kept refusing her offers. I guess I couldn't blame myself, I had jobs to fulfill, but she wasn't wrong. Was three jobs really too many?

       No, I convinced myself. I needed the money, she just didn't realize how important it was to me that I worked hard in order to achieve. It was understandable of her though, she didn't know my position. It was just her telling me to live a little, which was also understandable. Defending Cassidy inside my head through a mental argument made me feel a little better. Realizing how dramatic of the situation I turned it into, I shook my head, finishing my lunch break and heading back to work.

       Cassidy was usually busy with work on the weekdays, going out with her friends to have fun Friday night to Sunday morning, while I spent them keeping myself distracted in different ways with my shifts at the café.

       "I feel like you're always working," my boss chuckled before he entered the next room.

       I smiled as warmly as I could. "I've got nothing else going for me right now," I mumbled as I continued stocking the shelves.

       "I know you offered to take the closing shift but . . . why don't you take this one off?"

       I looked up at him. It was considerate of him to free me of my work, especially on a Friday night, but I took the shift for a reason.

       I enjoyed Cassidy's company, along with her friends', but deep down I knew my jobs were the only thing between us; and in a way, that was a good thing. If I wasn't free, how was I going to go out and drink with Cassidy and her friends? I figured I wasn't the one who had to oblige if my managers already booked me off; it was the only excuse I had that made me feel a little less guilty. I didn't want to hurt Cassidy's feelings or push her away by telling her I didn't want to hang out willingly, so this was my key to escape, even if it was just more work. At least it got more pay; I'd get out of that apartment and into my own dorm someday.

        Packing up my things, I waved goodbye to my co worker at the cash-register, heading out the door for a night all to myself. Cassidy usually left around 7:00 PM, which was when my shift ended, so I had no problem going home right away. I could slide in right after she left and she wouldn't know I was there. I smiled at my plan, relieved I could escape a night I'd regret in the morning.

       As I unlocked the front door, I sauntered inside, throwing my belongings onto the couch as I slid against the door, shutting it. I sighed, locking it behind me before I heard footsteps from the hallway.

       "(Y/N)?" I felt my heart drop. "I thought you were working late," Cassidy smirked, working her way towards me.

       "Oh . . . I'm . . . coming home for lunch."

       "Don't you have lunch there? I already texted you during your lunch break," she pointed out.

       I froze in my spot, my face painted red. I was never good at confrontation, a big reason I'd ran away from my problems all of my life. I wished that this could be one of those problems, buts it's not like I could just move out so impulsively. "Yeah . . . I meant my dinner break."

       "Oh . . . That's a shame," Cassidy pouted. She entered the livingroom, settling down on the couch. "I was really hoping you'd join us."

       "I'm sorry, Cassidy," I sighed.

       "It's fine . . ." she brushed off. "I gotta go call the girls now about our drive."

       "You made plans but you don't have a drive?" I questioned.

       "Well, I was hoping you'd be the one to drive since I thought you'd agree to come along, but . . ."

       At that point I felt guilty. She really wanted me to come, huh?

       What if I was being selfish? Cassidy wanting me to have "fun" wasn't really her peer pressuring me, was it? It was all coming from good intention; she didn't know why I was saying no and she didn't know I shouldn't have been drinking. But I did.

       Perhaps all I needed to do was learn some self-control. That way I could join their group, assist them as their helpful driver, and reassure myself I didn't need to be intoxicated to let loose. But was self-control really as easy as I was convincing myself?

       I looked over at Cassidy sitting on the couch, scrolling through the contacts on her phone before I opened my stupid mouth. "On second thought . . ."

~~~

       I struggled to keep my eyes open, rubbing them once more and looking up at the clock. I knew I shouldn't have come to that day's session but I figured, if it got me out of the house, maybe it wouldn't be so bad. I forgot to consider the sunny weather however, burning up my eyes as I squinted my way through London on my way to the clinic. I shook my head, trying to keep focus as much as I could.

       I know my praying probably wasn't doing so good, but I wanted to convince myself if I hoped hard enough, people wouldn't be suspicious of my behaviour. I was definitely not feeling well, but was I doing a good job at hiding it? A sigh of relief escaped through my lips as the session came to an end and I carefully stood up, grabbing my bag. As everyone else moved on, I noticed Murdoc waiting for me by the door and I tilted my head in confusion. I glanced behind me as Phoebe was focused setting up for her next session and I turned back at Murdoc who smirked with crossed arms. I tried to smile at him but I knew it couldn't have looked right. He chuckled and wrapped his arm around my back, helping me walk forward. We left the building in silence and stood together outside as we watched the familiar faces of our group disappear. I wasn't sure why I didn't continue walking, but I'm not sure why I was expecting a hungover me to do anything correctly anyway.

       "And you decided to drink because . . . ?"

       I looked towards him, horrified. I figured it wouldn't be worth lying, so I dropped my face to a frown and sighed in defeat. "Is it that obvious?"

       "Not gonna lie, I'm impressed at how well you held it together in there. It wasn't even that obvious, but I know you." He slanted his head, still looking for an answer with a cocked brow.

       I shook my head, disappointed in myself, and I noticed his smirk beginning to fade. "It's nothing bad, Cassidy offered to bring me out with her friends again, so . . ."

       "Hmm . . ." It was quiet for a moment but Murdoc wasn't gonna let me get away with a sorrowful expression. "Don't be so down in the dumps about it, love," he said. I turned to him, frustrated. Why couldn't he just understand that being happy about your unhealthy habits isn't exactly healthy? He recognized my unpleasant response and laughed at me. "Seriously, (Y/N). I'm not telling you to give up on rehab, but you don't have to hate yourself for messing up-"

       "I know but I'd rather hate myself more so I'm more likely to never do it again, Murdoc," I retorted, instantly regretting it. I felt guilty for raising my voice, aside from the instant headache I received from it. I watched him blink in shock and he pursed his lips, awkwardly. He clearly wasn't expecting that from me and I wasn't either, darting my head back forward, trying to ignore the uncomfortable atmosphere I'd just created. "It's just . . . I-I don't know why I do this to myself . . . People tell me I shouldn't beat myself up but how can't I when I let myself be in that position over and over again . . . ?"

       I heard his Cuban heels tap the pavement as he inched closer to me. I felt his smirk through his sympathetic sigh. He lightly nudged my shoulder, catching my attention. "I know how you feel . . . But maybe it's best you stay away from the kids who convince you to drink with them in the first place?"

       "What are you implying? It's not like I can avoid Cass, she lives two meters away from me." I closed my eyes in defeat for a few seconds, catching some conscious sleep. I could feel Murdoc watch and I looked towards him once more, desperate for him to help me solve my problem.

       "What I'm implying is . . . maybe spend a few hours with me. We could learn more about each other . . . Maybe even stay for supper if you really want. You don't have to, but life gets boring when you've got nobody to talk to." I knew this smooth-talking character was a confident man, he could make any women fall for him whenever he wanted. I didn't take Murdoc's offer as him flirting, not when he had so many better options around us, but why did he seem to hold back so much? I could see a hint of apprehension in his eyes as we looked at each other, he couldn't hide that from me. I couldn't be special, though, there must've been plenty of other girls before me who saw exactly what I saw. I guess I was just excited to have somebody else other than Cassidy who seemed to want to get to know me.

       "You need me to come over because you can't talk to your roommates?" I questioned, barely believing it.

       "I could try, but it wouldn't be the same," Murdoc persisted. "Besides," he continued. "I've got a hangover cure I think you'll enjoy," he said.

       I wasn't sure what that meant, but I didn't hold my breath. He probably genuinely did want to help me feel better, this wasn't some sort of pick up like to get laid, and I wasn't ready to be alone again either.  His smirk remained as if it were his only means of defence when he presented any form of pure kindness to somebody. He certainly wasn't shy, but perhaps when he offered a nice gesture towards someone, he felt more vulnerable. I glanced at the ground and back up to him, "Why not?" He seemed to wear an authentic grin for once, starting for the parking lot. I wished he would've worn it more often, watching him look back at me and gesturing for me to follow him.

       With a smile on my face and pep in my step, I walked after him. He took out the keys from his pocket and alerted his drive; a red muscle car. It was in great condition on the outside but when Murdoc opened the door for me, it was trashed on the inside. I nervously grinned and sat myself down in the passenger's seat. When he closed my door and got in on the other side, he instantly picked up the piles of junk and clutter, tossing everything to the back seats. "Let's just move this," I heard him mumble. The front was soon cleared of the cigarettes, flasks, and other trash, but it still reeked of alcohol and smoke. "Sorry," he chuckled, but I just shook my head carelessly. As he started the car and revved the engine, I flinched, watching him turn the radio on and turning the volume down from its past obnoxious high. Listening to his metal, I turned my head out the window as we drove out of the parking lot.

       I heard Murdoc hum a little as the songs passed, making the drive a little more peaceful. I closed my eyes when he rolled down the windows, feeling the wind against my face cool me down from the warm Spring air. I took a deep breath in and opened my eyes as I exhaled, feeling Murdoc's eyes on me once again. I glanced back at him and he immediately looked back to the road, tapping his fingers to the beat of the aggressive rock that played.

       The wind in my hair was refreshing, and the speed we were going fuelled my adrenaline. Murdoc gave me such an addicting and adventurous craving. His company may have been new and different to my life but it was definitely something I needed. I thought of these facts over and over, comforting myself until we were getting closer and closer to the highway. "Murdoc?"

       "Hm?"

       "W-where do you live?"

       "Oh, not far at all," he claimed with confidence. "I just enjoy taking the longer route on the highway. It fuels my fire," he added with a growl.

       As soon as we entered the highway, Murdoc excited, swerving his car around the corner as we came closer to a haunted-esque home. It looked broken down and neglected, so I wasn't surprised when Murdoc's vehicle came to a screeching halt on the side of the gravel road. He took out his keys, swinging his door open; but before I could open mine, he was doing it for me. I simply smiled at his gentlemanly actions, crawling out and taking my bag with me. He secured his car and walked me to the front door, fumbling with his keys again to unlock it and push it open. "After you," he smiled.

       I quietly laughed, thanking him. "Wow," I whispered. It was definitely an oldie. The architecture wasn't very modern, as well as the wallpaper and overall building. I stood in awe, intrigued by the aura.

       "It's just us today," Murdoc said, closing the door behind us. "My ba-" he began before coughing. I turned to him, waiting for him to finish. "My roommates, I mean, go out and hang out when I go to therapy, like the fun roommates they are, so maybe you can meet them some other time," he concluded. He groaned at the thought of it, slouching as he tossed his house keys to the coat rack.

       "Oh," I nervously laughed, sympathetic towards his loneliness.

       "Whatever! Who needs 'em!" He headed up the stairs across from the entrance, looking back at me. "Coming?"

       I nodded and we walked up together, heading down the hall. "My room isn't any better than my car, but it's hopefully tolerable," he admitted, opening the creaky wooden door. I headed inside before him, looking around. It was certainly messy, but I could see more of an organized chaos rather than clutter. His room was almost exactly how I expected it to be; leather this and leather that, dark-coloured everything - the typical Murdoc Niccals aesthetic. I smiled at how perfect it felt and even noticed his bass guitar in the corner of the room.

       "You play?" I asked, pointing to the instrument leaning against the wall.

       "Hm?" he questioned, looking in my direction. "Oh, yeah! Self taught from when I was just a lad," he explained, walking forward. He picked up the guitar and sat on his bed, beginning to strum. I joined him and he winced at the awfully out of tune strings. "She's an angel when she's tuned," he said, tuning it himself.

       Finally, he began to play, and I couldn't believe my ears. He was incredible. His hands worked so gently against the strings it was almost as if some professional came down from Heaven and worked their magic themself. "You're amazing," I said. Murdoc responded with a smile, continuing to use his talent. He made it look so easy, he worked so effortlessly. "How long have you been playing?"

       "I began performing when I was just a kid, but really started playing instruments when I was ten, maybe? My uncle would come over and bring his bass with him - he played in his own little band - and eventually I found enough courage to steal one for myself and practice whenever I could," he rambled. Did he really? I wondered if he still kept that stolen bass as some sort of sentimental piece.

       Looking at his present bass I studied its style, unable to find any clues as to what brand it could've been. It definitely looked like a rare type of guitar and I found myself thinking about it hard. "Where did you get this one?"

       "I'm contemplating whether you'd believe me or not," he said, pausing the music to converse more.

       I shook my head, "Why wouldn't I?"

       Murdoc grinned mysteriously. He must've been trying to tell me to prepare for his storytime but I was already prepared to trust him when my gut told me so from the beginning. He chuckled and shuffled in his seat, beginning to play again. "Back when I was a teenager, Devil-worshipping became one of my favourite pastimes, y'know? Eventually, I started making packs, and as a trade he gave me this beauty," he said, lifting the guitar from his lap a few seconds.

       I wasn't a very religious person. I lost my faith a long time ago, and for valid reasons, but something in the back of my head believed in him. I nodded, "What did you trade him?"

       Murdoc nervously laughed, "I-I dont really remember, something about music." He got up and put his bass away on its stand before looking back at me from where he stood.

       "Have you ever thought of playing professionally?" I asked. He walked forward, towering over me.

       "Definitely. I'm not gonna lie, I've even written a few songs before, but I just . . . I don't know, I just never got around to searching for fame."

       "You've written songs before?" I asked, beaming with excitement. "May I hear?"

       Murdoc smiled at me and headed towards his writing desk, pulling out one of the drawers. In his hands he held a folder just flooding with paper, and a few fell out. He ignored them, placing the folder on the bed. "There's another one somewhere," he mumbled.

       "There's another one? I thought you said you only wrote some," I said, opening the folder.

       "Well, I wasn't expecting you to ask," he answered.

       I looked through the pieces of chicken-scratch, listening to the tunes of the sheet music in my head and reading the lyrics. I learned how to read sheet music back in high school when I took a class, and for some reason I couldn't forget how. "Murdoc . . . you're a wonderful writer, how could you hide this stuff away?"

       Murdoc shrugged, sitting on the bed beside me. "I didn't think the world wanted to hear my sappy lyrics, either."

       "Yeah . . . Not that it's anything bad, but I wasn't expecting something so soft to come from somebody who . . ." I looked back at him as waiting for me to tell who I saw him as. "Somebody who . . . seems hardcore and listens to metal."

       Murdoc chuckled, leaning closer to my ear as I proceeded to dig deeper in his work. He watched over my shoulder, "The audience needs a bit of a surprise once in a while, it brings something worth playing and someone worth playing for."

       I smiled and placed the paper down, remembering the songs in my head and what their words could mean. "What was this one inspired by?" I asked, pointing to one of the sheets. The title of the song was 'Broken' and I was instantly intrigued when I read the first line.

       "Ahh . . ." he answered. "I met this girl once and . . . to say the least, it didn't go as planned."

       I winced, glancing back at him and his pursed lips. "What happened?"

       "I'd rather not say," he spoke dramatically. "It pains me just to think about it," he continued in theatrical emotion.

       I laughed in response, "Well, I wouldn't want to put you through any bad memories . . ." It went a little quiet, the only things we did was look at each other. "What are your songs usually inspired by?"

       "Oh-h-h, life events, stories I think of, dreams, and even nightmares . . . nightmarish memories. Not very happy stuff in all honesty."

       "Well, where does all the happy stuff go when you don't write songs about them, too?"

       "It was never there in the first place," he mumbled, turning away from me. I watched his grin slip away, distracting himself with whatever was outside the bedroom window.

       Hearing him say that nearly shattered my heart. It was so unexpected, I was trying to find the right thing to respond with. "What do you mean it was never there?"

       "Let's just say life sometimes isn't the easiest to get through . . . and let's just leave it at that," he answered. "Okay?" he concluded, looking back at me.

       All I could do was stare. I knew his bad habits had to have come from somewhere but I hoped it wouldn't be something intentional. I thought he just enjoyed his beverage more and more as the years went by, but it sounded like it was purposefully an escape; similar to my relationship with alcohol. "Murdoc . . . I'm sorry."

       "It's not your fault, (Y/N). Besides, I still live on," he replied with more enthusiasm this time.

       "I know, but it definitely doesn't seem like you're living on, more just getting through the days . . . Of course, there are days where it's okay to simply make it past and focus on tomorrow but it shouldn't be like that all the time."

       Murdoc stopped responding and looked down at his lap instead. All I could do was watch and hope he wouldn't leave me in the dark, pushing me away. "I know, but I'm getting by. That's all that matters, right?"

       "But you also need to make sure you're getting by as best as you can," I encouraged. "I know it's easier said than done, but making sure you're actually living and not just surviving is important too."

       Murdoc looked back at me and smirked, "You don't have to get mushy with me, (Y/N). I've heard this a lot."

       "I know, but I want you to know that if you need somebody to talk to I'm here."

       Murdoc's face twisted into confusion. It was as if nobody pushed the way I did, and it honestly hurt me thinking that this could possibly be the first time he's heard something like this in a long time. "Thanks," he said. "I mean it . . . And you can always talk to me as well."

       "Thanks, Muds."

       All Murdoc did was nod and stand up, starting for the door. "Now, about that hangover cure . . ."

[comicteaparty]

July 8th-July 14th, 2019 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from July 8th, 2019 to July 14th, 2019.  The chat focused on Court of Roses by Kelsey Peterson.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Court of Roses by Kelsey Peterson~! (http://courtofroses.thecomicseries.com/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PDT), so keep checking back for more! You have until July 14th to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite scene in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. What do you think is the story behind Merlow’s bad dreams? What demons is Merlow fighting exactly, and why do some of those “demons” want him to hurt others? What does it have to do with Merlow being triggered by Nocturne?

khkddn

1) hmm visually speaking I think my fave scene is when Diana shoots all those arrows http://courtofroses.thecomicseries.com/comics/117/ it just looks so cool

But I also liked when merlow bonded with the kiddos who were curious about his bagpipes, that was a cute moment

RebelVampire

QUESTION 3. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 4. What do you think is the cause of Nocturne’s unfortunate circumstances that he mentions having to make due with? What might this have to do with his poor amount of stamina or immense magical gifts?

RebelVampire

1) Probably the scene where Nocturne and Merlow sleep in an alley under the rain. I am a sucker for rain, and I liked seeing Merlow's acknowledgement that he was kind of a dick but that Nocturne was still able to forgive him. Plus, the atmosphere the rain added was too perfect. Somehow a spot of warmth among the cold and bleak. 2) I see this going in one of two ways in terms of my current theories. Way 1 is that Merlow's dad wasn't just an elf, but like, ultra evil wizard elf. And his dad is trying to control Merlow and use him as a beautiful and dangerous pawn. Way 2 is that Merlow got possessed by a literal demon and that fighting the demon from taking control is a daily battle. I think in regards to hurting others, asides it just being that's what evil things do, having Merlow hurt others is a pretty quick way to break his spirit and just have him cave to the dark side. Nocturne kind of looks demon-y so there could be that connection. Or maybe whatever Merlow has within him just hates Nocturne's species since that seems to be a common theme in the world.

3) Nocturne. Nocturne is classy, powerful, but has that cute smidgen of vulnerability that makes him endearing. Also very classy, and how can you not like classy people? 4) Nocturne maybe had a fight that did not end well due to overconfidence maybe. And this left him permanently weakened with poor stamina. I also get the sense that there is some deeper emotional trauma hidden in this. Like the person that caused his weak stamina was someone super close who probably betrayed him. Cause every story needs a good betrayal? XD Alternatively, maybe he just had a poor dice roll to begin with for the game.

Nutty (Court of Roses)

Those theories with Merlow and Nocturne are really cool, Rebel! aaaaa it's so neat to see people speculating this stuff.

That alley scene came out so nice too, I was happy with it. My own favorite scene so far... it's hard to pick, but I think it was the whole sequence of the main bards fighting the bandits that stormed the festival. Getting to let everyone show off, from Sven's muscle, to Feliks' conjuring madness, to Diana's enchanted tidinit, to Nocturne's mysterious power saving Merlow.(edited)

RebelVampire

QUESTION 5. What has been your favorite illustration in the comic so far? What specifically about it do you like?

QUESTION 6. What do you think the background stories are for Feliks and Sven? How might Merlow’s pre-established friendship with Feliks affect his interactions with the rest of the bards given they have more history?

Attila Polyák

I like had no time the entire week and could only read till the page where we see Sung from a distance. I didn't want to comment before I catch up, but now that I found a bit of time I get a server not found error. My luck is horrible. :( That said I do feel like my favourite scene will be the bit where Merlow performed and the cats came to listen. That was soo hear warming, but I'd like to read the rest before saying anything.

Nutty (Court of Roses)

Ugh, sorry, comicfury just, goes down sonetimes...

khkddn

3) merlow is my favorite character, he just seems so nice and sunshine-y! Diana is also cool too though, and I also like Feliks... decisions is Hard

ErinPtah (Leif & Thorn | BICP)

I don't feel like I know any of the characters well enough to have a favorite yet! I know how they act on the surface -- so far Merlow is the most entertaining and Nocturne is the most aww-inducing -- but we haven't gotten into the depths yet. Anyone could become my official favorite with the right reveal.

Was Merlow actually "triggered" by Nocturne, or just upset? Important difference there! I took it as the standard fantasy trope of "these two species have a history of antagonism, but after fighting on the same side for a while they'll develop an Unlikely Bond, and discover that they are Not So Different After All."

Favorite scene so far, hands-down, this page. Perfect cinematic smash-cut, makes me laugh every time. http://courtofroses.thecomicseries.com/comics/22

...no elaborate backstory theories from me, pretty sure Guilded Age permanently ruined me for theorizing about fantasy comics. Just looking forward to seeing where things go.

Nutty (Court of Roses)

That's a really popular page lol!!!

keii4ii

I have yet to catch up with the archive, but omg that is an awesome-tastic page (and now I wish Discord had a horrible bleeding music note emote to go with this)

snuffysam

real talk? my favorite scene in the comic was this: http://courtofroses.thecomicseries.com/ not even technically a scene, but the two panels side by side of merlow drinking alone, followed by merlow having a good time with all his friends, just got me right there in the feelings instantly. and the way the panels link to the first and latest page respectively is a stroke of genius. instant hook.

besides that, my favorite scene is the one of diana, sven, and feliks banding together to stop the bandits. these three were at each others' throats a second ago, but having to fight off those attackers brought them closer together. and we got to see them performing as a band while doing it. really makes me look forward to more things to come with the protagonist quintet working together.

Nutty (Court of Roses)

That makes me so, so happy, Sam, I was really excited to make those and code them properly, and I'm happy they have such an impact. :3

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. Which characters do you enjoy seeing interact the most? What about their dynamic interests you?

QUESTION 8. Do you think Merlow will ever meet his father or open up regarding the subject? What about Diana and her mother? Will something regarding Diana’s enchanted instrument and the history behind it come to play in the story?

RebelVampire

5) Favorite illustration is definitely this place. http://courtofroses.thecomicseries.com/comics/135/ I adore the particle effects, the change in colors and tone, and everything just works really well together. It's super awe inspiring to see Nocturne get a moment of badassery. <3 6) Feliks probably got banished for too many shenanigans. Since I'm pretty sure Feliks is a bit too comfy with spending nights in jail. As for Sven, I don't know. Maybe he's the one without some sort of tragic back story. Or maybe Sven has a tragic backstory but the tragedy of it all just flew over his head and he didn't notice. I do think there's gotta be at least something bad that drove his desire for justice. Like maybe he had a hero who died tragically or something. I don't know. But I do think Merlow and Feliks' past relationship is gonna drive some wedges. Cause Feliks seems like the type to go "well I've known Merlow longer than all you have" so ya know, everyone will be mad cause it can mean nothing while also being still true and itll just make everything awkward. And Merlow will make adorable faces and try to peace keep.

7) Merlow and Nocturne. They're both really different in terms of their relationship with being bards (or w/e Nocturne wants to call himself). And I think that their different viewpoints really bring out different sides to them that we wouldnt normally get to see. And theres no like bitter conflict either. Just two ppl filled with warm fuzzies trying to get to know each other and navigate the world. 8) Yes to both. The latter because I think he'll have to explain his past more in detail at some point, and that probably means telling everyone the circumstances of his birth. The former because wishful thinking cause there's nothing like meeting your long lost dad who went to get some milk and never came back. Diana too, of course, will probably have to talk about her mother who probably died tragically or, at the very least, when Diana was least prepared for it. I do think Diana's instrument will create conflict. In that someone will go, "Let's steal that enchanted weapon." And then it gets stolen and Diana freaks and everyone does bard battles to get it back for her.

Copper Mouflon

Been reading the comic and so far I'm really enjoying it! Didn't expect to as it's not what I usually read, but hey you kept me hooked and going for the next page! Absolutely loved http://courtofroses.thecomicseries.com/comics/118/ made me laugh out lout. There's obviously a lot of backstory in these characters and I'm curious to see where this will go!

Copper Mouflon

NNNooooo! I reached the end! Job well done! It only gets better as the story goes along, by the way, Nocturne is BAD ASS, but most of all I love who they all seem rather normal (in the context of the story) yet they all turn out to ... well be so awesome.

Nutty (Court of Roses)

:D!!!

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. What sorts of art or story details have you noticed in the way the comic is crafted that you think deserves attention?

QUESTION 10. Besides getting hired for a murder investigation, what other consequences do you foresee for the group in regards to what happened at Saung? Will it gain them notoriety, or will it be swept under the rug?

RebelVampire

9) Honestly the detail I'm addicted to is Merlow's hair. Like I like the thought that goes into that colored bit of it, cause that seems like it'd be annoying to remember to include all the time. But more than that, I like seeing the fact that Merlow will actually undo the braid http://courtofroses.thecomicseries.com/comics/70/ . Like there's several scenes like this where theres recognition that hair isn't plastic and displaces and people don't wear their more elaborate styles to bed usually. It's a nice realistic depiction of how hair works in everyday life. 10) I 100% think they're gonna have some notoriety from it. Cause what makes a better story than some bards who beat up bad guys at a festival. Plus, I'm sure other important people will sing their praises as well. Of course, this notoriety doesn't always mean good. Like sure maybe the king's 2nd cousin's butler will hire them for a job, but now bandit dude's secret twin brother can come and exact revenge on them. It's gonna be a dual edged sword where benefit and trouble will both come looking for them all.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 11. What do you think are this particular comic’s strengths? What do you think makes this comic unique? Please elaborate.

QUESTION 12. Who do you think murdered the count and for what reason? Was there any specific reason the murder took place during the festival? Do you ultimately feel Merlow and company will be able to help?

Attila Polyák

Okay, so questions, yummy! 1, Definitely playing for the cats in the alley, buut the beginning of the bard festival was pretty cool as well. That said, I just feel like that scene grabs the essence of performance so well. I really liked it. 2, I feel like his demons are literal demons and they cause his nightmare, tho I have no idea how he met/got posessed by them. Connection to Nocturne? Probably looks, he is an infernal after all. 3, Torn between Merlow and Nocturne. Merlow is just an ultimate positive dude even tho his demons seem to be rather messed up and Nocturne. Well... He's just plain awesome. 4, I think Nocturne is in this state mostly because of his own decisions. While we do not know much about him, we do know that he is: Not a bard, Someone used to having money around but not in any fear of not being able to use it, Fond of music, Is, magically speaking, rather powerful, In general a sophisticated person, In possession of some rather unusual items. While these circumstances could mean a lot of things, my guess is that he's kindof an alchemist and he somehow traded his stamina for magical capabilities in pursue of another, probably greater, goal. 5, I think my favorite illustration is the middle panel on http://courtofroses.thecomicseries.com/comics/134/ but really anything on this and the next to pages are. Just. Pure. Awesome. 6, I don't think Merlow's earlier friendship will influence the rest of his relationships as he seems to be generally friendly with almost literally everyone. 7, Merlow and Nocturne. I just find it to be a cool friendship, even though there are quite a few hints that there should be some friction between them for very real and serious reasons. Also Merlow "fanboying" about cool music is just adorable to see. 8, For Merlow... Yes, and I wouldn't be surprised if the topic was very eeply connected to his demons. Diana and her mother... I donno, maybe, but I'm more leaning towards no right now, but it could still happen.

10, I think that being part of the murder investigation will literally mean that they will be doing less bard stuff, which is obvious, but considering that they specifically came to town for the bard contest, it's still a shame. Now... beating the bandits already started them on an inevitable ride to notority, and being involved in the investigaton of such an inportant murder case. That will also boost them on their personal hype trains'. 11, Imo the greatest strength of the comic is the simple fact that even though a lot of not so great things happen to the characters (being thrown out to the streets for night, a murder case, bandit raid, inner demons, etc...) both the characters and the general tone of the story manages to be very positive. That's kinda odd, because this should be like... a bit of a dissonance. But the positive tone is just, simply there. I'd attribute that mostly to how Merlow reacts to everyone around him, but still since we see the story mostly from his perspective it just shines through a lot. Even when he is in pain, literally at times, he just somehow manages to feel positive. 12, I'm really unsure about the murderer, but I kinda feel like it's somehow directly connected to Merlow. Thus I ultimately think that the party will be able to help, one way or another, but the entire situation still feels a bit hazy.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 13. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

QUESTION 14. Overall, do you think the new troupe of bards will be able to get along? What obstacles do you think there will be in them learning to cooperate with one another?

RebelVampire

11) While there are a lot of strengths, the one that stood out to me the most was the character designs. They're all so individualistic, yet each one is very specifically tailored to the character's personality. Like the minute I saw Merlow I was like "this is just a nice dude who maybe is a bit sensitive." and thats exactly what i feel like i got. and i always appreciate when the writing and visual design go hand in hand. 12) I think the count was murdered because nice counts disrupt the order of corruption and makes all the other nobles look back. As for the festival, yes. I actually think someone is trying to pin it on a bard. Especially if that bard's name is Merlow cause Merlow seems to have shitty luck. As for helping, I mean, I'm sure Merlow and company can find something. Although I personally feel like investigative wise Feliks and Nocturne are probably the best suited for the task. But hey the others can provide moral support?

13) I'm looking forward to just finding more out about Nocturne and why people seem to hate Nocturne's species. But just more Nocturne being fancy and classy is fine too. 14) I think the group will get along, but I think some relationships will fair better than others. Like I don't think Feliks and Sven are gonna become best pals anytime soon. And I kind of feel like Sven is gonna struggle fitting in cause he seems a lot more high energy than a lot of them can handle. Outside of that obstacle, I do also think that the biggest obstacle for them will be secrets. Cause they all seem to have something they want to hide, and hiding things from people who are supposed to be your allies can lead to bitter feelings. as everyone wonders why they arent trustworthy etc. etc. so i guess a better way to put it is trust will be their biggest obstacle, and that theyll have to accept a certain level of vulnerability.

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Court of Roses this week! Please also give a special thank you to Kelsey Peterson for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Court of Roses, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: http://courtofroses.thecomicseries.com/

Kelsey’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/kelseynuttyp

Kelsey’s Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/kelseynutty

Kelsey’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/CourtofRosesCmc

[cowplant-pizza]

Get Famous Q+A

1. @cowconuts:

So many people are kind of iffy that the world is too small and too detailed for the amount of lots we get.  What are your thoughts about the world?  Many discussed that it feels like a game pack, rather than an expansion pack.  But I'd like to know what you actually like about the pack.  Like, the thing that would make you buy it? (If there is anything.)

Okay so, I want to be totally honest with you guys. I was personally underwhelmed by the world when I opened my game. It was actually something i wrote down in my little notepad when I was making notes about my opinions to write about later. There is only 1 empty lot to choose from when you start and its 50x40 that costs around $9,000. Imo, that is waaaay too big and way too much for what I guess is the starter lot in this world. However, I think there is so much detail in the world’s enviroment that I think I understand. Normally gaming companies will have to choose between two things on which to spend their resources so I guess they chose the enviroment instead of the amount of lots. BUT, I do understand this in a sense because people normally only play with one family per save with legacys or challenges and stuff, and with the ability to have as many saves as you want (or as your computer lets you lol) then I don’t really see it as that big of a problem because I’ll need to play at least about 11 saves before I’ve explored every lot in the world. That’s my opinion on it anyway.

As for my reason for buying this, I think it really adds a whole dimention of gameplay that we sort of needed in the game. It adds new interaction with things such as busking and dj’ing, and gives your sim an actual reason to do these things instead of just leveling the skill for a personality reason if that makes sense? The only thing I sort of felt missing from this is that pre existing townies like Penny Pizzazz and Bob Pancakes don’t already have celebrity status even though in their lore they are considered to be well known. So idk, maybe that’s something they could’ve added but I also think that might be a nice thing for you to do yourself!

2. @izysims:

Do you have an insight on the build/buy? The world is dismally small so hopefully we can at least make it beautiful.  Also what you not get famous from? I know retail you can’t but what else? Can you get famous from a restaurant?

Build and Buy is 50/50 for me. I think that the furniture set that was added into the game is super cute and I will use it a lot. It has a nice aesthetic like Laundry Day stuff. However the lack of clutter was dissapointing for me. I would’ve loved to see more of that stuff, like trophies or medals ect. Also there is nothing for children and toddlers so.. I was very shocked at that!

I’m honestly not sure what you can’t get famous from because it seems like you can get famous from a lot of things! I will let you know if I find anything though :)

3. @sweettartfish:

is being a celebrity worth it overall? i remember playing ts3 late night and eventually regretting becoming famous because of all the paparazzi with bad AI. of course they would still be intrusive, that’s the point, but still. i don’t really want to have to dodge even more random paparazzi if their mechanics aren’t very good. also, how do you feel about the actual celebrity skill mechanic? how are the “perks” and “quirks” ?

Right now my Sim is only on the first level of being famous after about 6 hours of playing. That’s partially because I’ve been editing and trying to find everything for you, and as of right now there are no paparazzi. Although walking around and seeing bigger celebs, I have noticed that there are always paparazzi swamping them. However you do have the option to opt your Sim out of being a celebrity or turing off celebrities altogether!

The celeb quirks seem very interesting tbh. I wrote them all down for you! I haven’t included the descriptions though because I feel like they are pretty self explanitary. 

Group 1: [lvl 1] Noticable - [lvl 2] Celebusim - [lvl 3] Established Name - [lvl 4] Career Hopper - [lvl 5] Easy Street

Group 2: [lvl 1] Networking - [lvl 2] PR Agency - [lvl 3] Fan Favourite - [lvl 4] Instant Besties - [lvl 5] Squad

Group 3: [lvl 1] Corportate Partnership - [lvl 2] Influencer - [lvl 3] All Nighter - [lvl 4] Trailblazer - [lvl 5] Lifestyle Brand

Good (only available at lvl 3): [1] Giving Back - [2] Rally! - [3] Star Treatment

Bad (only available at lvl 3): [1] Who’s Bad - [2] Play the Villain - [3] Feud Bringer

4. @sinister-simister:

Is Get Famous compatible with other packs? For example Pets, can pets get famous by social media? Are sims followed by paparazzi when walking, or only when they are in a specific location (restaurant, home)? Can you completely lose your fame if you dont keep on posting/acting/ect? Do traits influence the fame of a specific sim by any means? Are a famous sim's relatives, famous too? Does the update with the first person game camera help/influence get famous by any means?

1. I think GF is compatible in the idea that Sims can become famous from actions introduced by other packs. However there were no CAS or Build/Buy items for Pets and I am yet to test if they can become famous, but I doubt it.

2. Sims are followed on Lots definitely. I have seen them both in Del Sol Valley and San Myshuno so far but have not seen any on my lot, however I am a low level celeb right now!

3. Yes you can lose your fame. My sim got to level 1 fame after getting promoted to Level 3 Acting career, then the next morning it said her spotlight is fading! 

4. I think that some traits might influence your fame slightly. Being mean will get you a bad reputation and being good will get you a good reputation. There’s also a new trait with the EP so I’m asuming that it might make getting famous slightly easier with whims and quirks.

5. I became best friends with a celebrity and did not have any influence from them. However I do remember in the trailer they said that children can be famous from having famous parents. I’m not sure how far that goes in the sense of siblings or romantic partners though.

6. I haven’t tried it out because it makes me motion sick but no it will not have any influence.

5. @cowberrys:

are the paparazzi really annoying like they were in ts3 or are they pretty easy to avoid if you don't want to be seen? 💕

I’m honestly not sure I’m sorry! I know there is a famous people’s club in one of the bars and the paparazzi are not allowed in there.

6. @artsysimming:

How detailed is the acting career? Like do we get to choose the movies/acting we do or are they just randomly assigned jobs and whims like with the Get to Work careers?

You can choose one of two agencies to begin with that slightly changes your playstyle from the very first level. I thought this was really cool. The acting career is pretty slow and costly to get into however. You basically get the job, then check the auditions from your work tab. You’re given some options telling you the pay and the skills you should probably level to help you through the audition. Once you select an audition you then have a whole day to prepare. You go to the auditiopn the next day at 7pm. If you get through you then have another whole day (well, 2 technically) to prepare for the filming. You do not get paid for the audition, so between shooting, money can get reaaaally tight. I made a starter house of about $18,000 and on my audition day I was down to $60 and had had to sell a load of things in order to afford a guitar (my audition needed guitar level 2). However it’s actually quite fun? And something I have found very tough when playing ts4 is that I’ve felt like all they do is spend their time at work! So it’s actually a very nice break from working 24/7. You do attend the shooting with your Sim if you want to (like a normal interactive career) and that’s super cute. 

[sole-cuore-amore-e-droga]

Tel Aviv 2019: Straight outta Montenegro to Eurovision with 6 young souls

(this is a pre-vamp review so take this whole thing as “something I wanted to publish but my schedule was withholding until it was specifically time for them to be reviewed”, therefore, this is a bit of a retrospective review. Will tackle on its revamp later!)

Montevizija, which finally has an official Twitter account (we all should forget the times some dude named Vasilije pretended to having made one), offered us another batch of 5 songs for another year, actually revealing all of them beforehand this time and not just the snippets! Joy to the world I guess.

You gotta love Montevizija for it being the most underrated ex-Yugoslavian national final btw. Granted, it only lasted for 2 editions as of now, and it will take years to grow bigger as a thing, but so far, for us the NFs that are ingrained to our brains more are Dora, EMA and Beovizija (and even Skopje Fest when THAT was used to pick an act and not just served as a festival like it originally was meant to be), therefore Montevizija seems more shunned. But what do you expect when the lineup of 5 for two years in a row is not exactly as stellar as hoped for? Well, there are gems here and there, but they haven’t really won on either years (or at least not on the 2nd year if you call Vanja’s song a gem too), and yet somehow they find someone who call them great. But for me this Montenegrin entry is not. :L

And who is up there to be colossally blamed for its existence? None other than this group of 6 refering to themselves as D mol (with “mol” decapitalized for whatever reason... they used to have hyphen separating the ‘D’ and ‘mol’, but now they scrapped it altogether, an anime death I’ll never forget). Worth noting that I, as a 19 year old, have this particularly ugly feeling I must get rid of, and that’s the one of “feeling old”, already at my age. And this is how I felt seeing that the band whose song I am not fond of today is made up by members that are of 16-17 to 21-ish years old!!! So my heart insists that I shouldn’t go too hard on these poor younglings, even if this is just me, currently tackling the brethren of my age. Prepare as I’ll go to shred their composition they’re going to Tel Aviv with, “Heaven”, to bits.

Although, what I call “shredding to bits” is merely just nitpicking the reasons the original version (keep bearing in mind that I haven’t heard the revamp yet) sucks imo, and idk, the new “Heaven” miiiiiiight just grow on me, but I heavily doubt about it because I never cared for it in the first place (youhouuu, they were my last in Montevizija ‘19 for a reason), and I’m rather looking forward for the new faves from the 8 songs I haven’t listened to yet rather than those that were already chosen. And even the Eurofans were not quite fond on the revamp, as some think the additional ethno sounds made it sound worse (and of course there are some that kinda like it or think of the song as their guilty pleasure). So why shouldn’t I? :O

Anyway, old “Heaven”. The first sounds on here to grace my ears on this song consist of one light piano note being tapped to an exact rhythm and a confused baby girl stuttering. And I’d’ve maybe enjoyed this more ironically at some point if it weren’t for the latter sound effect being re(ab)used later in the song!! Ugh I hate it. The lyrics are fine I guess... though isn’t it ironic the only English song in Montevizija’s lineup this year won?? It’s like the Montenegrin people were openly cringing when being the only ones to understand Vanja comparing his life to cat’s and mouse’s and calling his heart “the most expensive toy” in his song and then they were like “you know what? Let’s let the WHOLE Europe understand how terrible our lyrics are! ^_^” (no but for real, who still uses “I’m in heaven, falling straight into your heart” as a pick-up line? Did they travel through time from 1998 to 2019 or something???)

Speaking of the 90s, the whole song smells like a dated cliché of that period. You know, the kind of “the high school prom song from that 90s teen sitcom’s who you’re forced to watch when your elderly aunt is in the house with you and there’s nothing else on TV” dated. Dated even more than “Chain of Lights”. Seriously though! It includes the pathetic “wah wah” bassline, mid-tempo beats, the boy/girl-group harmonies... catch me puking sugar-coated cheese to this, no thanks. Oh and if you already read my “Zero Gravity” review (which you probably never even bothered to after seeing how much text would you have to read), I definitely mentioned that I’m not a fan of those “two verses-two choruses” songs, and especially those kind of ones that aren’t sounding like something suited for radio (e.g.: Poland 2018, “Light Me Up”)... this obviously sounds like something from the radio of the times the at-the-time senior highschoolers are currently over 30 or slightly over 40, and that should be 4 and a half minutes long. These verses could just not be more ridiculously dragged out for the choruses to prevail and get stuck in our brains... fucking welp [sic] me already.

Well, if there are any brownie points I could give this, it’s pleasant, it’s harmless if I don’t take into account the cheese vibes this emits, and all this bunch are made up by up-and-coming talented singers that clearly deserved a better song...

And the staging concept in their NF was cool tho (illustrating their power of D mol), and I applaud the couple chemistry I guess

Oh and this below is one of the most underappreciated memes this Euroseason:

*stares into your soul in Montenegrin*

So yeah. Oh and the Rizo(tto) guy who is self-aware of his hotness and the hotness of the much older Eurovision guys this year, but he’s not doing it for me so that I could be in heaven falling, so he’s getting a hard pass.

All in all - a nostalgia cash-in made to appease the housewives from Podgorica to Skopje, from Novi Sad to Štúrovo, and nothing quite else, sung by a cool bunch of people that if anything are deemed this year’s "great people with an unfortunately too dated song and a shitty draw” by me. I don’t know much of their personalities but I do believe that even if they like what they’re singing, they’d be much better off doing a better sounding throwback, at least. So that even the disappointed-by-”Heaven” Eurofans could at least call it “so dated but a BOP!”. And hey, I’m aware of those fans that will likely be pissed at me for not bopping along to this, but I said what I said about it and yet again, if revamp changes my mind, I will change my opinion, but right now I’d not prefer to. Grumpy Adio.

Approval factor: Hell with the no. I would like Vanja back instead. At least he made himself a somebody to be cared about even if the Eurofans didn’t quite adapt to his song in return.

Follow-up factor: somehow, both “Inje” and “Heaven” were/are seen by the masses as instant NQs, so it somehow doesn’t sound like Montenegro is following a great path so far. And after this year anything that audience favours and wins can be seen as a way better follow up after something meh coming after something wrose.

Qualification factor: For the n-th time, I’m yet to check the revamp out to state where this will actually go, but being put 2nd in the draw is a massive stab in the knee, as demonstrated by even the national finals this year (Electric Fields in Australia Decides, Aly Ryan in Unser Lied für Israel, Lisa Ajax in Melodifestivalen final... the only glaring exception is ZENA in Eurofest but is it me or these producers did this just so they could be all like “heeeey we put a winning song on 2nd just to show that a NF song can win from ANY draw! ANY DRAW!!!” lol nope), and from it only a few lucky souls have crawled out victorious (Nathan Trent for example, the draw might have pushed him down in the semi but he got up again!). D mol, for as young and developing in talent as they are, don’t seem to be such. You can be young and pitied for your personality, but you always can at the same time have a song that completely crushes your chances to do well and sweeps up the last shards of hope right in front of your eyes despite being an angel worthy of protection (Ari Ólafsson, anyone?). Unless the D molians work all their magic and the random ethnic vibes into their favour for some reason, but for now it ain’t gonna work.

NATIONAL FINAL BONUS

And even then, what was so interesting about Montevizija 2019?? Let’s see...

• First off, let’s address one meme of the beginning of 2019 that Facebook may or may have not used purposefully to upgrade their automatic “facial recognition” skills - the 10 years challenge. Our first one of this season is the sassy maneater who spent her ESC stint by trying to unlove a guy so hard that he just couldn’t oblige - Andrea Demirović. Her decade-later A-game happened to be this one song she sang in her mother-tongue: “Ja sam ti san” (I am your dream). Now, I wasn’t particularly into it - I enjoy some electro tracks out there (like hello, “Igranka” is one of my favourite Montenegrin entries, and 2013 entries overall as well) but this one just ended up being the right amount of cool AND overbearingly unsettling for me to not really fancy it. Kinda like “Red” by HyunA - I can only bop to this if I don’t care about the fact I actually hate it, oops. (Or maybe it is just because Andrea once again used a composition done by one of those “rent-a-NF-songwriter” people. Which is at least better than collabing Ralph Siegel who’s stopped being relevant ever since starting to work with San Marino, or even since the hilarious attempt of a peace song sung by the original common framework, six4One. But since Michael James Down has co-contributed to one of the better Montevizija songs last year, I will not allow myself to think it’s thanks to those kind of songwriters.) Nevertheless, the Eurofans actualy kind of loved this song, but sadly, Montenegrins and the international jury did quite not, and she didn’t land on to the superfinal 2 (as opposed to a superfinal 3 last year, to which she could have easily qualified if it still were a 3). Here’s her song to y’all anyways (and the performance too, which just needed to include some random monster dudes dancing around... why? Because Eurovision! ^^):

• Speaking of Andrea, during the results part there was this one shot of hers where she was pictured just casually chilling on her phone, not giving a damn that she’s being underrated on the scoreboard. Not only she was badly rated, but this moment was such an universal #mood!

• In between the finally final results announcement (which I didn’t really know when exactly was it taking place because the winner wasn’t really said out loud before the event I will describe next was taking place??) there was this lottery going on of who would be the lucky two audience observers that’d win tickets to Tel Aviv... hilariously enough though, it somehow malfunctioned and there were some sort of errors regarding the announcement of the RIGHT winner <3 but the winners happened and I hope they’re getting to go to Tel Aviv at some point during the Eurovision events! Hope they don’t feel startled by the lack of taken seats this year.

• Unlike Eesti Laul, Montevizija this year took up the job of showcasing tweets of Eurofans, and somehow this fellow fella ended up seen by a handful of Montenegrins AND international viewers. Take a wild guess which of them know what a daddy Serhat is.

• And who could not forget the magic flying envelope for to announce the winner of the NF:

there must have been some Harry Potter magic in there :O

As for what touches the other songs, well there’s the last year’s fan fave Nina Petković with another song, but it’s no “Dišem”, so don’t even bother. Or bother, but imo it’s just okay-sounding, nothing that groundbreaking or pleasant enough to be competitive. The other few songs were also nice but I’d like not to make this longer as my other write-ups, to be fair. Sucked to be Mr. Kállay-Saunders who, as the international juror chosen for this national final, had to rank its songs... as that NF happened right on the same day his second A Dal 2019 performance was taking off. Not that the international jurors were supposed to be present in Montenegro on the day of this NF, anyways...

Anyway, despite all this goddamn criticism (that could’ve flown more smooth had my computer not restarted in the middle of me doing paragraphs for this review), I’m fare welling the D mol-ians and would like to wish them a heavenly Eurovision experience. ^_^

[vskpop]

My 30 favourite songs of 2018

YouTube playlist ⋅ Spotify playlist

30. Heroine – Sunmi

I hesitate to call Sunmi feminist – does she consider herself one? Can k-pop really be feminist? – but her matter-of-factly, eyes-wide-open songs that touch on the position of women in relationships and in society are the closest thing to genuine female empowerment I’ve seen in k-pop. It doesn’t hurt that every single one of her songs is amazing.

29. Bboom Bboom – Momoland

Considering I usually hate “viral” songs – I’ve been brainwashed to like Gangnam Style just recently – I’m still shocked at how much I love Momoland’s Bboom Bboom. I’m also proud to say that I was an early adopter of the song, and watching their success skyrocket made my Q1. I’m still not tired of the sax line and of the “GREAT!” shouted during performances. This song (and Momoland, really) is just irresistible.

28. Retro Future – Triple H

The last ever song by Triple H (anger abounds) is just a taste of the genre-bending, sound-mixing, absurd-lyric-writing that we could have gotten for many years. Their retro-future has nothing to do with the Jetsons, and much more with insane 80’s synths and, well, that sexy vibe.

27. Love Shot – EXO

Well, EXO, that was last minute. My ambivalence towards EXO is represented by this song, which I both find ridiculous and adore at the same time. This song’s luscious synths and layered vocals make it elegant, then the performance makes it kitsch. I don’t know if I’ve been brainwashed, but it’s so great.

Other songs of note: Electric Kiss – Tempo – Gravity

26. Not That Type – Gugudan

A thousand times yes for Gugudan doing edgier concepts. Not That Type is the spiritual successor to A Girl Like Me, and it’s almost as good. This song, however, is even tougher and more explosive. The new 8-member Gugudan is off to a great start.

Other songs of note: The Boots – Shotgun

25. Beautiful Feeling – Day6

Yet again, it’s my special skill to ignore all the popular songs that a group has, and in this case the rock vibe that defines it, and pick the sweetest, mellowest song they’ve put out. Day6 make some amazing power ballads, and Beautiful Feeling gives me warm and fuzzy feelings every time I listen to it.

Other songs of note: Days Gone By – Headache – Shoot Me – Somehow

24. Dinner – Suho ft. Jane Jang

I don’t know how the powers that be decided that this duet should happen, but the result is everything. Jane Jang’s one-of-a-kind voice layers beautifully over Suho’s, who ended up being often overlooked as an EXO vocalist for all these years.

23. Remember Me – Oh My Girl

Every single Oh My Girl put out is juicy in its on way. They may always go back to their foundational dreamy pop, but they never fail to throw in a twist. Remember Me’s EDM flavour and heavy rap are a total change from Secret Garden, but the song still blossoms into a romantic, airy chorus, and all of the members find something to sink their teeth into.

Other songs of note: Secret Garden – Magic – Love O’Clock

22. La Vie en Rose – IZ*ONE

My resolve to ignore the existence of IZ*ONE (and survival show groups in general) faded at the first two octaves of La Vie En Rose. This song does so much with so little: the atmosphere it creates, and the contrast between the powerful pre-chorus and the understated chorus are what makes the song for me. In the meantime I’ve started to learn their names, so I’m doomed.

21. I Want You – SHINee

SHINee’s constant stream of releases this year is at the same time a new beginning and the beginning of the end. It’s hard to imagine that a whole year has passed since Jonghyun, and it’s hard to think that the group has survived even though these songs are concrete proof. I really struggled to make it through the more melancholy songs, so I picked I Want You out of a series of basically perfect tracks.

Other songs of note: Good Evening – Chemistry – Electric – Who Waits For Love – Countless – Our Page

20. LATATA – (G)I-DLE

I would be surprised if there was a single Boombayah lover who didn’t love this song. It has the same (pseudo-Indian?) influences, the same rhythms, the same anthemic quality. Latata is catchy, hypnotic, fun, and showcases all the members equally (ok, maybe Soyeon a bit more than everyone else). This is a textbook debut for 2018.

Other songs of note: Maze

19. 1, 2, 3! – Seungri

Here’s someone who usually did club music and for once didn’t, and I loved it anyway! 1,2,3!  is retro, guitar-led and much more lighthearted than anything Seungri has ever done. It’s lovely to see a less sultry (and a biiiiit slimy?) side of him. Also Anda.

Other songs of note: Hotline – Where Are You From

18. 22 Century Girl – fromis_9

I feel that my obsession with fromis_9 is still at its earliest stage, and that by the end of 2019 I will have gone totally mad for them. I am in love with their singles – To Heart, Love Bomb, what instant classics! – but the whirlwind of sounds of fever dream 22 Century Girl have stolen my heart.

Other songs of note: To Heart – Love Bomb

17. Blue Moon – Gyeong Ree

Another one for the theme of this list: house! Give me all of it in your pop songs! Here’s hoping that Gyeong Ree (wasn’t it easier when she spelled it Kyungri? Anyway) continues her solo career with such intriguing, sophisticated but super-fun songs.

16. Stay Here – Sojung

I don’t know exactly, but I cry my eyes out more often than not when I hear this song. Ladies’ Code’s Sojung’s voce is as light as a feather, until it explodes in the soaring chorus. Everybody knows that I love any power ballad, but the complex emotional balance of this one is just on another level.  

15. Now or Never – SF9

I can’t say I’ve been following SF9 as idols, but I have been listening to all their releases and they have given me nothing but quality. I know I complain about songs with drops, but the deep house (yep, again) and that sensual “jealous” have been killing me ever since they came into my life. It might be my favourite hook of 2018.

14. I Love You – EXID

I was a bit taken aback by EXID’s Lady earlier in the year, but it was love at first listen with I Love You. The distorted hook opens and holds together a song that has all the best of EXID, including Solji, who has returned stronger than ever with flawless vocals and zero shame.

Other songs of note: Lady

13. Dejavu – NU'EST W

You guessed it – house. Nothing has given me as much joy as the rise of NU’EST W, and I’ve been even happier because they did it with superb, incredibly on-trend songs while retaining the dark charm of their pre-success material. They really leaned into the “sexy bandit” thing, and I’m all for it.

Other songs of note: YlenoL – Shadow – Feels – Help Me

12. Oh! My mistake – APRIL

This song is fluffy and super-poppy and at the same time side-eye in music, if that was ever possible. The super-innocent and cute concept that APRIL have been doing since forever is now tinged with tongue-in-cheek sarcasm, and a little creepy synth that perfectly matches the theme of the track. It’s so addictive and so delicious.

Other songs of note: Oh-e-Oh – BEEP

11. Snapshot – IN2IT

I love when smaller groups do really, really great and out of the box stuff instead of copying their more successful peers. I’ve watched countless performances, entranced by the bass that opens the song, holding my breath for that “heartbeat go fast, heartbeat go slow”. This is one sexy song, and IN2IT are one good rookie group that I will keep my eye on.

10. Timeless – NCT U

Leave it to me to find the most niche release a super-popular group has had, and fall in love with it so deeply that the rest (most of which I hated, not sorry) doesn’t count. NCT are too big of a group with some really, really good singers hiding in the back line while the rappers swagger about. I loved that some of them got their chance to show off and I adore this poetic, heartbreaking song.

Other songs of note: Boss – Baby Don’t Stop – Replay (PM 01:27)

9. Shine – Pentagon

I have to wonder if this song would have been higher in my charts if it wasn’t for the bloodbath that was of Pentagon and their career after this song came out. It’s such a pity that such a feelgood song has become, well, not so feelgood. This song’s wonky piano riff and anthemic chorus are still a delight, and their personality really shines (LOL) through. OT10 forever.

Other songs of note: Off-road

8. The Grand Dreams – Minseo

Where did Minseo even come from? Why hasn’t she been here our entire lives? Her dreamy vocals have been giving me life this year, and her refined musical sense (or of her producers, really) is a breath of fresh air when everything gets a bit to same-y in k-pop.

Other songs of note: Is Who

7. One of Those Nights – Key ft. Crush

Key came in last minute and slapped us all in the face with a perfect album that is reminiscing of SHINee’s work from earlier in the year, but also shows his personality as an artist. The lead single One of Those Nights moves fast and interweaves the melancholy of the lyrics in the music. Both Key and Crush are shockingly good vocalists, but together they just make each other shine even more.

6. Allegro Cantabile – Nature

Random music terms / Italian? I had to check it out. Nature put out something that’s a musical number, j-pop anime opening and k-pop bubblegum all in one. Their vocals are amazing and they are adorable. I’m excited to follow them into 2019.

5. DDU-DU DDU-DU – BLACKPINK

Is this Blackpink’s best offering? No. But what does it say when your not-best is still miles ahead of the competition? Blackpink have been doing k-pop bangers better than anyone else, and DDU-DU DDU-DU, from Jennie’s spitfire rap to Rosé’s melodies, hits all the right spots (like a ddu-du ddu-du).

Other songs of note: See U Later

4. Puzzle Moon – GWSN

This song is so good. These girls are so good. As I put together this list, I realised how much all I wanted in 2018 was a good deep house sample, and GWSN delivered. The bass contrasts elegantly with the tiny voices, and the obscure chorus – “make it moon” – emphasizes the magical atmosphere of this song.

3. Air – Winner

I miss old Winner. New Winner’s YOLO swag annoys me at best, so I dig through their b-sides in search for what we lost when Taehyun left. Air’s appropriately breathy chorus and gentle, romantic atmosphere did it for me and managed to put Winner on my podium yet again. Good job, Winner. Now stop it with the tropical house.

Other songs of note: We Were – Movie Star – Raining – Have A Good Day

2. KILLING ME – iKON

The year started well for me (and everyone else) and iKON with Love Scenario, but I had no idea of where it would bring us. Killing Me’s bitter, moody atmosphere made for the dance song of my dreams. The decisive beat and array of distortions somehow create an eerie, understated atmosphere. It’s a dance song, but make it sad and a little creepy.

Other songs of note: Love Scenario – Rubber Band – Beautiful – Perfect – Freedom – Don't Let Me Know

1. Oh My – Monsta X

I know. I am annoying myself by picking a b-side as my favourite song of the year, but here we are. Monsta X have become one of my very favourite groups and, while their album songs have always been amazing, to me Oh My summarizes everything I love and everything I want from them. In a year of minimalism, it’s loud, larger than life, unafraid of bleeps and bloops, rich in both vocals (Kihyun!) and proper rap sections. It’s the powerhouse that I expect from them and I hope to hear again and again.

Other songs of note: Jealousy – Destroyer – Fallin' – Spotlight

[thefloatingstone]

anime asks for the bean god, 16 17 18 19 20 21

I’m sorry it took me a while to get to this one X’D I’ve been battling fatigue for a while and everything is harder lately ;___; (If only I could find a way to make internet shenanigans my day job)

Also heck yes! Bean God! If I ever need a new Username somewhere I am snagging that! X’DD

16. anime you wish had another season

As I said before, this is a really hard one because all the single season anime I like are already getting a second season ^^; and of the very few single season anime I like, they tend to be perfectly self contained stories which I don’t think need another season at all? The only one I can really think of is Ore Monogatari, and even that I feel could have accidentally started to drag if it was given another season, although I also feel another season could have given it more time to develop relationships more. But by the end of the show, Takeo and Yamato seemed to have settled into a rather stable part of their relationship. SO who knows. But I would have liked more time with these dorks ;w;

17. anime that didn’t deserve more seasons but got them anyways

Madoka Magica and Yuki Yuna. Madoka Magica because the original 12 episode series was perfectly self contained, may have had an insane amount of Suffering(tm) and punishing girls for having dreams and aspirations (of trying to save their friends and family) but at least the series ended with a positive note where one (1) girl used the power she was unexpectedly given, got told what she SHOULD do with it, and instead used her godlike power to literally save every other girl on earth from a terrible faith and then continued to watch over the earth and all magical girls forever....

....and then they kept making movies and OVAs and whatever the fuck else with alternate timelines and EVEN MORE suffering(tm) and turned Homura from a determined girl trying to break reality to save her crush friend into a psychotic obsessed psycho and everything that followed the original series focused on how they can make the girls suffer EVEN MORE and they are completely unnecessary and unneeded because the series was DONE. It ENDED. It had a CLIMAX. There was no need for more of it. But they did it anyway and it’s bred nothing but even more misery and pain and has gone on to change every other magical girl show into a copy cat with even more misery and pain.

And Yuki Yuna because it was a terrible, awful crappy show even with its first season and then they just decided to make more. It has everything in it that made Madoka Magica bad and none of the things that made it good.

I already mentioned who my favourite villain is :)

19. favorite hero

Sailor Moon!

A positive role model who teaches us that you can be someone who is not good at school or sports, is not considered “traditionally feminine” and has a lot of “personality problems” and you can even be someone who gets scared and cries easily and who is clumsy and not the brightest. And you can be ALL THOSE THINGS and still be someone who can fight against bad guys and make the world better and protect your friends and family.

She teaches forgiveness and kindness towards those who might have wronged us, to recognise pain in others and offer a helping hand instead of instant punishment... but she ALSO teaches that SOME bad guys do not deserve forgiveness and Kindness. Some bad guys are people who need help and love, and some bad guys need to be put down.

She teaches that you can be the most powerful thing in the whole solar system (if not the whole galaxy) who fights of literal Old Gods from beyond the stars trying to destroy the world with eldritch horrors, and you can do this using feminine-coded attacks, weapons and armor. You don’t HAVE to give up being a girl to be tough.

And she teaches that even when things are truly awful and terrible, you can still try your hardest to do the best that you can to fix things. You may not be able to fix them completely. You may not be able to save everyone the way you wanted to. You may not be able to make everyone the happiest they can be. But you can at lest try with everything you have to make things as good as you possibly can. And even if it’s not a completely happy ending, you tried as hard as you can, and things are still better than they would have been if you didn’t.

I already answered my favourite costume/character design :D

21. ugliest costume/character design

Ugh this is hard because sometimes a character design can be so terrible and bad that it swings into being hilarious and awesome. So a truly bad costume or character design has to be something that is bad, but not SO bad as to be enjoyable (like most of Mamoru’s fashion choices)

I could easily say “Every anime tiddie ever” but that feels like a cop out (lol pun not intended)

I personally hate the look of Sailor Moon Crystal (all seasons of it) but that’s more an art style than a character design or outfit. (Character design and art style are two extreme different things and many people seem to forget this. You can draw a good character design in a good art style and it will instantly look better. But you can’t draw a bad character design in a good art style and have it be fixed)

But after thinking it over really hard, I think I cannot for the life of me think of a WORSE character AND costume design than Son Karin from Gowcaizer, designed by the infamous Masami Obari