#i know youve been feeling bad recently

[etherealkins]

( X / X / X ) ( 💎 / X / 💉 ) ( X / X / X )

subspace + medkit (phighting) with themes of medicine, gems, and related stims in teal + red for mod aziraphale... + a related song.

[crimeronan]

every time i get an ao3 comment on a horror fic along the lines of “jesus fucking christ. this is so vile what the FUCK what the FUCKING FUCK THIS IS SO FUCKED UP” i hug my laptop to my chest and kick my feet and roll around in bed giggling like a schoolgirl who just got a love letter from her crush. omg you got physically nauseous.....? eeee

[dullahandyke]

Remember kids no matter how insecure u are in your knowledge of something, there r people who know less being more confident

[arolesbianism]

Listening to some bndori covers I haven't listened to properly yet and man smth abt Ran just brings out the best in whoever they're colabing with, like I keep forgetting that Kokoro and Ran actually sound good together despite how weird of a combo that sounds to me on paper

[amoressb]

𐙚 Hairclips

pairings : emo bf!niki x coquette!reader

synopsis : in which you saw you had some cute hairclips laying around and had the perfect idea to decorate your bfs hair in them

⋅˚₊‧𐙚‧₊˚ ⋅

You were walking around your dorm trying to find something to do. It was around 5 in the afternoon, you had a little snack and brought it to the couch in the living room.

Turning on the tv, it illuminated the small room as well as the two hairclips you left on the table. Suddenly you had an idea. Sprinting to your room, you find yourself looking for more clips and bingo! You found your drawer full of cute hairclips youve bought overtime and some your bf had gifted you.

That’s right. Niki. Your sweet loving bf.

You found it cute how he was basically the complete opposite of you. You loved all cute things and mostly stuffed animals. He on the other hand likes the complete opposite but that didn’t deter you from falling in love with him. Just then you look back at one of your plushies that remind you of him. Your badtz maru plushy. You had won it on a date you’ve recently went on with him and instantly fell in love with it as it reminded you of him. But back to the main thing here..hairclips.

You wanted him to come over quickly and what more of a perfect idea than to say that it was an emergency or that it was urgent that he come over. I mean technically you weren’t wrong..you missed him badly and you wanted to see him. So you grabbed your phone and sent the message to him.

A couple of minutes later, there was urgent knocks to your door and you ran to it knowing it was Niki. “What ha-“ was all Niki could say before he was dragged quickly to your room and sat down on the floor while you grab all the clips and sit on the bed. He was too tall to sit in the chair resulting in you having to be on your tippy toes.

“Can you tell me what-“ again he was silenced when you put your finger towards his lips smiling simply saying shhhh. You started by grabbing a pink bow of course and placed it on the side of his head clipping back his hair. You scooted back a bit and you were already in love with this idea. Immediately grabbing your phone you took a picture for memories of course and the bow was just too cute.

Many clips later, you reached the best clip of them all. Your badtz maru clip. He had been sitting there patiently waiting for you to finish. He realized a while ago that this is what was so ‘urgent’. The whole time he was admiring you and falling in love with your smile more and more as you keep adding more clips to his hair. He had his arms wrapped around your waist so you can be closer to him. He also ended up laying his head or his chin up on your lap as he was starting to slowly fall asleep to your soft touch and the cozy warm feeling he’s feeling being here with you.

Happily putting the special clip in his hair, you grabbed your phone once again to take a picture, letting you see that his eyes are closed which made it all the more cute. This was gonna be your new wallpaper for a lonng time. “I’m done my love” you say softly to him. “So this is what was so urgent huh” he sleepily chuckles. You smile as his sleepiness and softly lift his head up in your hands and melt seeing him lean into your touch. “I’m sorry it took so long” you say feeling bad that he had been stuck here for a while in the same position cuz you had that many clips. He smiled saying he didn’t mind and he was just happy to be with you.

You will say the contrast between him and the clips made it all the more perfect. He was wearing black plaid pajama pants with a black long sleeve so the pop of so much color on him with your hair clips really was perfect.

“The things i let you do to me” he says as he cuddles up to you wrapping his arms around your waist after having to sit longer just to take the clips off. You giggle into his chest and look up at him. You both looked into each others eyes not realizing you both are slowly leaning into each other. He lands a sweet kiss on your lips pulling back shortly after smiling down at you. “Goodnight y/n, i love you” he says kissing your forehead. “Goodnight Niki, i love you too” you say cuddling closer into his chest. You both fall asleep with a smile on your faces.

[yandere-daydreams]

hi. so this is kind of a random musing that doesn't have anything to do with what youve been talking abt on your blog recently so feel free to ignore it, but i love how you write yandere nanami and between going live and an ask one of my followers sent me i kinda had a revelation. i wanted to see if you had any thoughts.

i think that before meeting reader nanami would be a virgin.

even if were talking non yandere nanami, i don't think he's ever had sex. i can't see nanami being the kind of person who likes hookup culture - he doesn't want to be used by someone - but i don't think he'd be able to justify getting in a romantic relationship because his job is so dangerous. he wouldn't want to die one day and leave his partner widowed. so he stays celibate, he's come to terms with the fact that he'll die untouched.

(he just jerks himself to freaky ass porn to get his fix (maybe even a camgirl hehe))

at least, until he meets a woman who makes all of his morality fly out the window.

suddenly, his sex drive is higher then ever. he's cumming into his fist every night to the thought of this special girl doing abhorrent things on his dick. he loves her. he's never loved someone this much in his entire life so she has to be the one to deflower him. that's probably one of the most romantic things someone can do in his mind, so it has to be her. she's his soulmate

all of this to say, i think nanami would kidnap reader and force her to teach him how to have sex through some fucked up means. it just tickles something in me imagining how stupidly giddy he'd be, so unabashedly pathetic as he undresses a woman for the first time.

like, him holding her hand with his forehead pressed to hers, cumming inside of her, jumping through as many mental hurdles necessary to justify what he's doing (or maybe just not caring bc she'll come around eventually, right?)

i love your work. thank you for listening to my ramble. <3

tw - non/con, kidnapping, manipulation, delusional behavior.

no no no i agree entirely,,, no amount of propaganda can convince me that any of the jjk men every had their dicks touched before the age of twenty-five at least, with nanami probably being the worst offender among them. i mean, he doesn't really connect with people outside of the sorcerer world, not really, not in a meaningful enough way to lead to that kind of intimacy, and as for other sorcerers... no. just no. he'd rather die a virgin than resort to anything as desperate as that, which is quickly becoming a very tangible reality.

and then he meets you (or, alternative, stumbled onto your stream at some ungodly hour, his cock already in his hand and his pleasure-deprived brain frantic for something soft and pliable to latch onto), and he decides that it might not be so bad to consider alternatives after all.

i can see it going one of two ways: if he has any reason at all to believe that you're also a virgin, whether or not it's true, he'll immediately lose all patience. if that wasn't the case, he might be able to take his time, stalk you for a few months before consummating your blooming relationship, but now he's on a clock, now he has to get to you before someone else does. he still tries to make it romantic, lights candles and brings you flowers and all that, but he's rushed, panicked, babbling incoherently about 'being each other's firsts' as he haphazardly undresses you. it's a miracle he remembers to do any prep at all - he's just in such a rush to be inside of you, to be the first and only person to every know what it's like to fully, genuinely actually be with you. if there's any pain, he'll comfort you later, make up for two and a half decades of abstinence with his tongue and hands, but only after he's already ruined you for anyone else.

if you're not a virgin and he can't make himself believe you are, then he'd probably go a little less absolutely feral (at first, i mean). don't get me wrong, you're still getting kidnapped asap, but rather than a beacon of innocence and purity that he can taint, you're the corruption forcing him to fall from grace, and he's going to want you to act like it. he's got a list of virginities he needs to to take (his first handjob, his fist blowjob, the first hickey, etc.), and between every milestone, he's going to want you to teach him how to pleasure you, even if you're still insisting you'd rather not let him touch you at all. he wants your full participation - it doesn't matter how many times he makes you cum on his tongue while you're sobbing into your pillow and trying to block him out, he's not going to stop until he hears your sweet voice encouraging with the little 'right there, kento's and 'good boy's he's made you rehearse. by the time you actually take his virginity, he's going to have made you feel dirtier than you ever could've made him feel, but so long as he's the one you're feeling dirty with, nanami doesn't really mind. not when he's buried inside you, his chest pressed into yours and he's too lost in his own pleasure to think the tears staining your cheeks are anything but beautiful.

anyway loser virgin nanami you will live forever. perhaps loser virgin gojo will pay for his crimes next.

[j1mmys-darl1ng]

Could you write an angst oneshot to reader soothing Kit's pain while he cries into her after one of his punishments pls?

October 8th - kit walker (angst)

Pairing : kit walker x reader

A/n : i honestly didnt know how to write this so ive decided to tweak it slightly just so i can write it slightly easier. Thans for the request 🫶

Rain hammered onto the glass panes of the windows to yours and kits house. Kit had seemed... Different today... Almost as if he'd been distancing himself.

"hey.. You ok?" your voice is soft as you speak to him, a hand rubbing over his shoulder as a way to try and coax him into speaking.

".. Im fine." he grunts, his body tense at your touch. Seeming.. Afraid?

"your clearly not.. Youve been ignoring me all day.. And your as tense as a rock right now"

".. I said im fine." his tone grows more stern, pushing your hand away and leaving the room.

"we are NOT doing this again! You cant just keep pushing me away kit. Thats not how this works!" you trail behind him as he walks into the bedroom.

"fine! You wanna know why? Because that shitty asylum is on the damn news again! Their not treating their patients any better! I suffered through hell and back in there. I dont want anyone else to." his voice wavers slightly, his eyes begining to gloss over with tears.

His breathing was at a slightly quickened pace, his hands clenched into tight fists at his sides. You immediately fill with guilt for making him feel that. Seeing his eyes full of tears. The slight quiver of his lips.

".. Kit.."

".. Look im sorry for snapping but it just hurts too see that. It just reminds me all too well of the typa' bullshit they put me through"

Without another word being spoken, you pull him into a gentle hug, peppering his face in comferting kisses.

"dont you ever apologise for that, you could say anything and I couldn't stay mad at you.. Your one of my soft spots" you mumble into his shoulder, his arms wrapping around your waist as he lets out a deep exhale through his nose.

"i love ya' sugar, so damn much" his face burried in your hair, the feel of his warm tears in your hair.

A/n : im so sorry for how bad this is. I have been really stressed recently its a miracle my hair isnt gray.

Thank you so much for reading! <3

[elulsdr]

WHAT DO PEOPLE THINK ABOUT YOU?

PILE 1 PILE 2 PILE 3

hey guys, it's my first pac ever so i would love to have your feedback. this pac also has random messages too rather than what do people think about you.

it's mainly about the messages i got. i hope it resonates⭐️ (i swear i'm better at personal readings LMAO)

PILE 1

people think you're very self oriented and love to have the power over them. maybe you have leader qualities and they can see that. i'd say they think you're more likely to choose logic over emotions. they think you're def the overthinker one. they know you know you're worth and know when and what to say something. they can feel that you like to be seen as cold hearted and powerful. in your head being numb equals having power. people think you're very materalistic as in, whatever you wear you make it seem expensive. people think you're very soft inside but don't let a lot people in. sometimes they can sense that deep down you're really insecure and they can see the other side of you. where you're not sure of anything you do, you don't trust yourself enough. sometimes you come off as really complex and a lot. you seem to be stuck on something. you want to let it go but can't really do it cause you get used to it. so that's why people can sense your imbalance energy. you could be indecisive or air headed these days. still, people know you have the strength to get over it. you could intimidate people at first but when they see the real you -which you dont show it to many they love it. maybe you got hurt on the past, that's why you put a mask like that. you could be very obsessive, and passionate about the things you love. you come off as competitive too.

PILE 2

oooh my broken heart pile.. if you recently gone through a breakup, doesnt matter if it's romantic or friends. people see youve been thru ALOT. you show it to everyone whether youre aware of it or not. people can sense the broken energy. you keep trying to explain your feelings? or what happened between you and the other person and they're like, can she move on already?? but it's cruel to think like that. cause i feel like this relationship somehow connected to your inner child. maybe the relationship helped you with healing your inner child that's why you felt those emotions that hard. people think you're sensitive and a romantic. everything i said was in the past, your energy now seems very refreshing and stepping ahead. also i have a really bad headache rn, are u ok? take care of your health and make sure you sleep enough. you have many sleepless nights. anyways, people see your steps to a better life. although you might got addicted to the new me concept and ignore everyone who tries to help you or tries to talk to you. you're like, i don't want your help i've been by myself all this long i can take care of myself from now on. they are a bit annoyed by this. they think you're a bit stubborn. DEF a hopeless romantic. don't try to burden everything and try to move on with your life asap. take your time to heal. and take people's help -only the ones who really care tho. aww i just got the 3 of swords. pls keep your precious heart safe bby. your love is enough and you will find someone that loves you as much as you love them. (wow pile 2's photo says the exact same thing, i didnt mean to do that lol)

PILE 3

hey pile 3, why do you feel so alone even if you're out with your friends? you like to ask people for advice but somehow you don't trust them as much as you trust yourself. i mean good for you but people -maybe your friends can tell that you're faking your feelings sometimes? maybe you feel the need to be happy around everyone even if you feel like shit. they can tell that. there's this person you are stuck on. it seems like you arent able to let them go. people really wonder about you guys. you could be a heartbreaker too. you and your friends are sarcastic people. people could get annoyed by the fact that you guys have fun lol. people think you have it all and you will have it all. they dont like the fact that they cant get a piece of you, your space, your time. it's like, there are people who want you but you got someone else on your mind who you seem to cant have. you like to learn more and more. you're very smart and people like that. but there's just this unknown people love about you. you have the friends, you have the grades, you have the face but what is it that makes you sad(?) and broken? people wonder the shit out of this lmao and you don't give them a chance to understand it. you tend to zone out a lot during the day and your thoughts makes you go nuts. people just seem to curious about you. they don't know enough. the more you don't give them the chance the more they wonder. people feel that you have tons of other shit to do than answer their questions. they know they don't deserve to steal your time like that.

[wndaswife]

https://www.tumblr.com/wndaswife/747747462026067968/its-been-a-few-weeks-since-youve-broken-up-and?source=share

ahhhhh rae apologize!!!

i feel so bad for wandaaa, ik her whole approach at the beginning was awful and mean, but poor little bean was confused 🥺 specially being surrounded by "friends" like hers 😤 she's actively trying to be better for reader and change her meanie ways 💖

honestly i wish R noticed something wrong about Wanda that night as she tried to leave, maybe R sees the folded note as it falls off Wanda's purse?

Wanda was in such a hurry to get out of there that she didn't even notice that the note fell as she was putting away her phone and she's practically running away.

R picks it up and even tho she tries to be mindful of Wanda's privacy she can't help but be curious as Wanda seemed to be holding that card the whole night, so R opens it and reads it and immediately feels guilty about invading privacy but then realizes what it is about and it's clear Wanda feels so strongly and passionately about someone (you decide if R figures out who it is about 👀).

Maybe who R was talking to after her performance was a classmate or just a friend showing up in support, and they encourage you to go after Wanda and clear things up.

(Or maybe R just goes about the rest of the day, doesn't chase after Wanda nor contacts her for days, but R does notice how different Wanda seems, unsure of herself and low spirited, so different to who wrote such a passionate poem and you hate seeing her like that, even thoughyou feel you should keep your distance, she's becoming so different from the Wanda you feel in love with and it worries you so much)

Cheerleader!Wanda is so angsty and even tho she fucked up I still think she's such a baby and should have her happy ending 🤧

linked

ohhh i was planning on going back to this once i was able to theorize with all the horny wanda asks but i thought ab it a lot after my recent drabble

yes for sure, r has never really seen wanda so shy, because she's never really been a shy person i guess? she's always been really confident and sure about things, because she doesn't have anything new going on... until i suppose she started falling in love with you and that was new to her!! so you got to see her more vulnerable and shy :3 but even when she visited you to see you play, you could tell she was feeling really unsure of herself and hesitant. because she's tried to talk to you before, you know she expected to have a longer conversation with you once she came

i think it would be really cute if r noticed wanda drop it and kept debating on whether to read it, because you don't wanna give into liking her again like you did before and you also know that she didn't give it to you for a reason

at the end you decide to return it to her, and wanda again then has a choice of whether to keep it or to give it to you! she ends up giving it to you and says that she wanted to write a little poetry because she knows you love it and wanted to be creative for you as a gift for your gig at the restaurant :3 it's a big milestone since your breakup, since you are reminded of why you ever felt so fond of her

but it's also a new side of her you haven't really seen, because wanda was only beginning to explore being vulnerable to you when she started getting serious about your relationship

so it's like you're falling in love with the real her this time... (which is crazy because that means you loved her when she was at her worst too)

[tigerdrop]

Got any fun thoughts to share about Ford and Bill?

they drive me crazy dude. i have a lot to say about them so im putting it under a readmore

ive been billpilled for 1 million years dog. hes like the Blueprint. bills the perfect entity to me: terrifying shapeshifting demon who can slip into every corner of your mind and read all your thoughts and memories. and also hes a cartoon character with noodle arms and a cute shape. and hes a pathetic worm whos hung up on his human ex. and hes a funny little guy whos playful and mean and delights in tormenting you but juuuust enough so that he doesnt break you. Hes so awesome

like. listen. this isnt going to be a surprise if youve read literally anything ive ever written. but if bill possessed ford and slammed his hand in a car door and got a kick out of it and put him in a funny little outfit id be fine about it. ford was literally in a 24/7 freeuse lifestyle with him so why WOULDNT he

yeah im kind of a masochist. Why do u ask

put his ass in a horny neurotic guys body and see what happens. hit his dick with a cartoon mallet for fun. slap him around a little. feels cool and neat! like "human bodies are so responsive, huh" said while blanfords about to jam a fork into an outlet (thats my name for it btw. Im not looking it up)

what if i hurt you?? what if i dropped you??? Just kidding :-)

i dont know how much genuine sexual pleasure bill would get out of it so much as the thrill and novelty of a new human sensation but i think that could be fun in and of itself. jacking off with another guys body in a weirdly distant way like Haha Wow. Im getting kind of flustered here! (actively jamming a coke bottle into his pussy)

and the thing that really drives me crazy about ford is how much fetish shit he thinks about/makes inventions for/has inflicted upon him. i think in the series finale hes tied up like 3 fucking times. its insane. he wants to give up control of his body so fucking bad dude!!!!! (exhibit A: ford going limp like a kitten whenever hes picked up. it happens more than once.)

and theres even more contrived bondage bits in the deleted scenes! its maddening. hes an insane obsessive bdsm-lifestyling pervert and hes likethe ideal guy to match bills freak

hes soooo fucking easy. its so much fun to me. theres something really erotic about the way bill makes him feel special about his hands......like.......its naked flattery but its also kinda true. its weird. he likes weird shit. and ford falls for it soooo easy. drives me nuts

now walk with me. think about how easy that same interaction would transfer to ford being transgender. and your not allowed to get mad at me bc this is just my thing now

its so strange! kind of captivating. bills been around the block but the western conception of transmasculinity is so recent that for him it might as well be a blink of the eye. so i think it would be new to him. especially given when he actually makes a deal with ford. just another special thing about his special little guy. he *knew* there was something about ford

and to be frank i think that if you were a transmasc pervert in the 70s and a dream demon came along that understood you inside and out and can make all of your bizarre fantasies come true. well. you would have been fucking stupid not to fuck him

i need to read the book of bill so fucking bad bc the extra context of bill being super hung up on ford drives me CRAZY!!!! i love bitter lovestruck jerks. i love divorce. and i think they could and should hook up again. bad guys that are reluctantly forced to stop being so bad are so much fun and fords huge fucking ego didnt go anywhere. i think bill could convince ford to give him a second chance. at least just to hook up for old times sake

anyway. im making a bill itabag. Gotta go

[laniusbignaturals]

i MUST hear more about your arcade/caesar grossfic. they compel me So Much and everything youve posted about them only draws me in more

(Gonna insert my answer to this ask in here too, since they’re about the same topic.)

Well, I certainly appreciate the interest from both of you, and whenever it gets done I expect to post it on AO3. I’ll be sure to drop a link on this blog, of course.

As for the content, it’s.

Well.

It’s chugging along!

The Producer, also called Arcade Makes Bad Decisions: The Fic is the most recent addition to the WIP purgatory I’ve been collecting since I last finished a writing project two months ago. It will hopefully break the streak, since I’m still actively writing it. In the fic, Arcade has a prolonged emotional episode on the anniversary of his father’s dad’s death, which he’s spending separated from people with overlapping life experience (like his mom and Daisy) while working to become a research nurse. He ends up lingering in a part of town he’s not used to, meeting Edward, and having a one night stand with him. Interspersed throughout are flashbacks to Edward at the age of 35, as old as Arcade is in the present. Back then, he was presenting as much more of an overtly dangerous, untrustworthy thug than the beguiling, image conscious slimeball that takes advantage of Arcade’s extended breakdown for some fleeting sexual contact. The non-chronological order adds enough suspense that I feel comfortable calling it porn with plot, but ultimately what it comes down to is just that. Mildly distressing porn, decorated with some themes of performative masculinity, stress addiction, and cultural stigma.

I’m gonna make a concerted effort not to post any supplementary material to the fic (stuff like the playlist, the header image drafts, etc) before the damn thing itself gets done, because I really need to stop letting these WIPs die on the vine once I’ve had my fun with imagining them. Always good to know that there’s an audience, though. Thank you!

[lyranova]

Hello Lyra, I hope youve been doing well. I noticed that today is the last day your requests are open so before it ends, I wanted to request Nacht X reader with prompt list:

Fluff(2.“It’s you, it always has been.”)

Fluff (7.“You’re an idiot.” “But you love me.”)

Angst (44.“What am I in your life? Because as of lately I feel as though I’ve been nothing to you.”)

General (7. “Is that blood?” “Yes but that

doesn’t matter right now, what does matter is-” “You are literally bleeding.”)

Genre: Hurt/Comfort

Thanks for taking this request 😊

Hiya anon! Of course, and I apologize that this isn't quite what you wanted (It's more fluff and I wasn't able to fit in the last general prompt 😔) I was having...a pretty bad day when I wrote this, but I still hope you find it enjoyable!

Word Count: 591

taglist: @loosesodamarble

Warnings: None

------

“ What am I to you? Because as of recently, I feel like I’ve become absolutely nothing to you.” Nacht stared at the woman as the cold and confused words slipped from her tongue. She was angry and hurt, that he could clearly see, but she also had a pleading look in her eyes. Nacht looked away from her, how…how did he tell her how he was feeling?

He had been avoiding her a lot recently, and it wasn’t because she had done anything wrong or because he didn’t like her, actually it was quite the opposite. He liked her. A lot.

He opened and closed his mouth over and over again, trying to will the words to come out of his mouth.

“ Come on, Master Nacht,” Gimodelo urged as he crawled onto his shoulder. “ Just tell her, it’s only three little words.”

“ Yeah, but those three little words carry a lot of weight to them. I don’t want her to feel burdened if she doesn’t feel the same way.” Nacht muttered, and he suddenly heard the devil sigh beside him.

“ Mater Nacht likes you a lot, Missus! He thinks you’re pretty, smart, and kind. But he also likes that you sass him, he finds that aspect of your personality very attractive!” Gimodelo said loudly, causing Nacht to stare at the devil in horror, as the woman just stared in surprise.

Gimodelo gave Nacht a toothy grin before disappearing into the shadows once again, leaving Nacht there to deal with the ‘mess’ his devil had left.

“ You…like me?” She asked softly, her eyes having a look of hope in them as her face remained calm. Nacht felt his cheeks burn a bit, and he couldn’t help but look away out of embarrassment.

“ I do, even when you thought I liked someone else a few months ago. It’s…you, it always has been and always will be.” Nacht admitted softly as his blue eyes tried their best to convey how much she truly meant to him.

The two just stood there quietly, not moving or saying a single word. Nacht began to grow nervous, maybe this was a mistake, maybe he should scold Gimo for opening his big mouth. But suddenly the woman smiled softly.

“ You’re an idiot, you know that? But I guess that’s why I love you.” She said with a small laugh, causing the dark haired man to grow confused and his heart to skip a beat at her words.

“ You…love me?”

“ Yeah, you didn’t know that?”

“ No, I didn’t.” Nacht said bluntly as he tried his best to suppress a smile, the woman tilted her head and rubbed the back of her neck.

“ I’m sorry, I thought I was being obvious, which is why you kept your distance.” The woman admitted sheepishly, Nacht quickly shook his head and walked up to her.

“ The reason I kept my distance wasn’t because of you, and had absolutely nothing to do with you. I was trying to…sort out my feelings for you…” Nacht admitted. “ I wanted to make sure my feelings for you were genuine and weren’t fleeting before I confessed my feelings.” He added as his cheeks burned a light pink again.

The woman began to giggle.

“ I see, and Gimodelo felt that you were dragging your feet uselessly, so he decided to confess for you?” She asked with another giggle, and Nacht found himself chuckling as well.

“ I guess so,” Nacht admitted with a chuckle and a shake of his head.

“ So, should we commemorate this special day with a date?”

------

Thank you all so much for reading and I hope you all have a good day~!

[a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire]

Hello everyone, today I'll do something never before seen on the flames and darkness liveblog which is read TWO chapters!! Idk man, i havent been able to read more than one chapter at a time recently because this book suddenly turned into such a slog to get through, although granted that might also just be my mental illness making it more difficult. whatever, i'll be in treatment for that next week

Anyway, today I'll be reading chapter 44 which is the star fall chapter, and chapter 45 which is. a chapter. Knowing this book series nothing of note is gonna happen in that one but that wont stop me from reading it

Chapter 44

Okay, theyre mentioning Feyre not looking so emancipated amymore and it made me remember all the weird weight shit from the start of this book. Like, she was losing weight because she was throwing up all the time and then not eating a lot and everyone was constantly remarking on that and it was unbelievably uncomfortable, but then when Feyre officially joined the night court and everyone immediately stopped talking about it, it almost feels a little manipulative, if that makes sense. Like, this book is ostensibly about Feyres healing journey but the Night Court cannot, under any circumstances, have anything negative associated with it so her trauma basically just disappears so we dont have to see the unpleasant parts of her recovery, she has one (1) nightmare after she starts living there permanently, one (1) moment where she feels too depressed to leave the bed and a few moment where she acts out but then immediately feels bad for it every time

Ughhhhh Feyre is wearing a dress for this which is really frustrating but you guys already know how I feel about that so shant go into that much more detail on this

I swear Im not just saying this to be a hater, Feyres dress sounds so tacky too

yoooooooo is Cassian implying he'd like to wear a tacky ass dress too??

and yet hes just wearing a BLACK TUNIC bro Feyre is literally covered in diamonds from head to toe so she can look like a shooting star or whatever and Cassian doesnt even have the decency to wear a black tunic that glitters or something?? Or hell, maybe even a red tunic to match his siphons, idk, give me SOMETHING im gonna tear my fucking hair out

Feyre is wondering about the IC being her friends and its like, girlie theyre barely even each others friends and youve known each other for maybe half a year to their 500 years

Feyre is describing Azriel hungrily staring at Mor's ass and it reminded me of that one bonus chapter Ive seen discussions about where he's really horny about Elain in a way thats pretty uncomfortable, and a lot of ex-Elriels say that it made them stop liking the idea of the ship because thats when they realized that SJM was just gonna mutilate both of their characters for the sake of smut, but honestly I dont think she would even need to mutilate Az that much

I could not give less of a shit about the Mor/Cassian/Azriel drama but I have to admit its kinda funny reading about Feyre speculating so much about Mor's relationships knowing shes gonna turn out to be interested in women

Mor says that Rhysand was very upset after she had sex with Cassian and beat him up as hard as he could (#incest) but she says he wasnt upset because of her virginity but because of the danger she put herself in by losing it, which is like, first of all that seems like splitting hairs, he was still upset that she lost her virginity even though that was none of his business. And second of all, I think it would actually make sense for him to have the kind of archaic sexist beliefs that would make Mor losing her virginity upsetting to him, considering he was also 17 when that happened just like Mor and Im guessing there wasnt anyone around to teach him feminism. or maybe hes so feminist he came out of the womb believing in womens rights and didnt need to be taught anything

god, the inner circle dynamics are so comically fucked up I have no idea how they can stand being around each other

Again, Im not much of a Feylin girlie but "Your hair looks... clean." >>>>>>>>>>>>>> "You look like a women again." (???? whats thag even supposed to mean)

So Rhysand is not wearing a black tunic, but he is wearing wearing a black jacket which is equally disappointing. atleast he has his tits out i guess

Rhysand was gone for 50 years and yet his best friends are not spending any time with him at their first party together since theyve been seperated, thats what i call friendship goals

Yeah, I guess its kinda sad that Rhys missed out on important holiday that meant a lot to him while undr the mountain but you know who else had to do that? Literally everyone that wasnt from the spring court

So he doesnt wanna tell his friends, who are by all accounts doing alright because theyve spent the past few decades trapped in a beautiful idyllic city, about his trauma but hes perfectly fine traumadumping on a twenty year old woman who just started to recover from her own trauma

Maybe Im just in a bad mood but this bullshit where theyre getting covered in star spirits or whatever feels so joyless to me, like its not whimsical or fun to me

Okay so, Ive heard about Rhysand calling Feyre exquisite and it made me cringe just thinking about it, but it looks like theyve translated that to him calling her 'herrlich' which means the exact same thing but it sounds a lot less weird and bad. once again, thank you, Alexandra

Feyre really just said "You regret sexually assaulting me? But why?" huh

Chapter 45:

Okay, thats the end of the chapter but theres two more things that kinda annoyed me that I didnt feel the need to mention as I was reading. 1) Feyre kept going on and on aboht Rhysand being her friend, it felt so insincere, its like sjm say a post online right before she started writing this chapter that was like "in the best relationships, your partner isnt just your partner but also your best friend" and decided to put that sentiment in her book, and 2) I felt like there were so many moments towards the end of that chapter where Feyre is like "oh, ive never felt this way with anyone" and its very obviously alluding to how she didnt love Tamlin as much as she does Rhysand now, and it was just very strange to read, like Tamlin was haunting the narrative even though hes not even dead yet

Uhm. so i got really tired all of a sudden so I took a nap at this point and read some gay vampire fanfic to rejunivate myself and now Im ready for whatever happens in the next chapter

"I was a traitor. [...] Even though I oficially left Tamlin - it was only two months ago, after all. By Fae standards that was probably barely more than a day." Oh yeah, i havent been keeping track of the time thanks for reminding me that this story about immortals is moving at a breakneck pace for no goddamn reason. But also, as an author trying to write a grand long-lasting romance, why would you write this. I know Feysand are gonna get married at the end of book and now when I get to that point Im not gonna be thinking "wowwww such romance" Im gonna be thinking "damn these bozos did the fae equivalent of getting eloped in vegas after knowing each other for barely a week"

Oh, men of all ages are training at this camp? would you say some of them are. child-aged

Feyre is being all "its so cold here, im freezing in my illyrian leathers I cant imagine a child with no clothes surviving here for a single day, much less eight years" (referring to Cassian) and yet she doesnt spare a single thought to all the children who have to be at this camp as well because this is the camp that the batboys grew up in, its not like this is a different kind of camp where they dont train children

God I hate Feyre thinking about how fuckin powerful the batboys are especially because its like, Rhysand is literally their high lord, he already holds so much power over the guys running this camp we dont need a reminder that he could easily crush their minds or that his goons need more syphons to contain the totality of their power or whatever

I get that these guys are like, shitty misogynists or whatever, but I dont think Rhys throwing them out of the house they live in is some #boyboss move hes just being an asshole

Rhysand would never want to lock Feyre in a house for protection, but he does want to decapitate anyone who lays a hand on her which is soooooo much better

Rhysand keeps calling the.... "females" of this camp "girls" which implies one of two things: 1) hes talking about adult women, hes just calling them girls, which is not very feminist of our feminist king, or 2) hes talking about actual girls aka children which. thank god for our feminist king having equal-opportunity child soldiers

Its actually kind of surreal how theyre at the camp where the batboys spent their CHILDhoods and Feyre keeps talking about what it mustve been like for Cassian while the narrative is actively avoiding talking about children being at the camp at this present moment while also not outright stating "there are no kids here at this present moment"

"'[The clipping of the wings is] to ensure the safety of their women, they said.'" this reminds me of something @/kateprincessofbluewhales said in regards to Rhysand forcing illyrian women to train but not doing anything else to advance their rights, which is that the wing clipping mightve started as a way for men to help women dodge the 'draft' that seems to be mandatory for all healthy illyrians. I dont really have anything else to say about that, it just popped into my head and i thought it was interesting

Rhysand is talking about how at some of the camps, women are declared anti-marriage material if they train and how he cant do anything about that and its like, even if these women are not officially declared unmarriable or whatever, the misogynistic men that make up these camps are probably not gonna wanna marry a women who trains, so what difference does that really make

Also, he says the only thing he could do about 'laws' like that is to murder the warlords and take their children/trainees? under his wing and I guess he thinks he would have to do that for every camp that does that but honestly, I think just doing it once or twice would send a powerful enough message to discourage other warlords from being misogynistic. And he wouldnt have to raise all these children all by himself either, Im sure he could get the help of a few non-sexist men or even, gasp, some women. Like those priestesses living in that library Im sure some of the ones that have already recovered from their trauma somewhat wouldnt mind teaching some boys about the harm that misogyny does

Okay so the blood rite is called a Blutritual [blood ritual] in german which is a little confusing because a ritual is a pretty specific thing and I dont think the blood rite is that specific thing but whatever, it sounds cool enough

Ive said this before, I am not a Tamlin girlie, at best I prefer him to Rhysand, and I dont like or trust Rhysand at all, but imagine hearing that tragic story about how their families killed each other, leaving them as the only survivors and being like "I cant believe Tamlin killed Rhysands family!!" especially when its like, the only person Feyre actually knows Tamlin killed is Rhysands dad who sucked ass, its not exactly a great loss

I feel like i had a lot of thoughts about a lot of things in this chapter that I couldnt write down because theyre these abstract half-thoughts, so I think I'll let those marinate until theyre full thoughts and share them with you at some later date

[retrointhenow]

Broken Barrier : Peter Pan X Reader

Author's Notes: This is a story based off one of my recent tiktoks. My tiktok is retrointhenow, the same as my tunblr here! I have tried shifting before and have yet to be successful. I don't have tips for shifting. I'm also not interested in making a part two for this so please don't ask.

---

"Come on." I groaned staring at my ceiling. It's been about a week since my last shift to Neverland. Things went exactly as I wanted them, I set my timeline as a nice calm period. I had everything I wanted. The boys were nice, the mermaids haven't tried to drown me yet, and life was good. Recently I've had trouble shifting back, time moved slowly in Neverland compared to my actual reality, but I think Peter is starting to catch on.

There was a two month break between shifts and Peter heavily questioned where I was. Thankfully I was able to blame the met,aids but I couldn't use that excuse again. Sometime I forget that the language dialect is different that what I'm use to so I'll slip up when I'm talking. I think that's part of what gives me away. At least I wrote down in my scripts that my clothing was different.

Finally I was able to relax and dream of Neverland. It's hard to describe how I get there. But it's like someone turns on a light and then I'm there.

The island was hot and humid today. I analyzed the terrain surrounding me and noticed that I wasn't to far from dead man's peak. A long hike back to base camp. Without a doubt Peter knew I have arrived. He knew everything that happened on his island.

"Y/n ? That you?" I heard someone call. I walked toward the voice and Devin ran around a tree.

"Oh hey Dev! Beautiful day today isn't it ?" I smiled and joined him on his duties. Devin was my best friend, without me writing that in. He was the first to greet me and actually welcome me to the island.

The boys were a little skeptical about a girl arriving in Neverland. Of course Wendy was there, but Peter only kept her as collateral for the Darling boys. Peter had no agenda for me though.

"Don't tell him I said this. But I think Pan has been worried about you." Devin picked some berries.

"How so ?" I worked at another bush. Of course I wanted Peter to like me, but I decided to let it happen naturally. It's my own desired reality where I could control anything but I wanted something to feel real. Besides, I want to know how he would really feel about me.

"He's been running around the island searching for you. He's had quite the bad attitude as well." He frowned and stood up. "If I didn't know better, I'd say Pan cares about you." I passed my bowl to him and rolled my eyes.

"I would like to think so, but Peter has quite the attitude without me being present. Besides, we was probably doing his island perimeter checks." My heart swelled with joy at the though. Could he actually like me ? No, no he's too busy. But Devin wouldn't lie to me. Then again he is a boy. Best not to get my hopes up.

Together Devin and I made to long trek back to the camp. We talked about what happened since I left last. Fortunately he was easy to gaslight and confuse about my whereabouts. I just took pieces of what he said and included them into 'my' story about where I was. From what I gathered Felix has been running the camp as Pan hasn't been around recently. Could that be because of me ? No, I'm stretching to read between the lines.

"Hey Y/n, long time no see huh?" Felix greeted me. I felt myself flush with worry.

"Not such a long time. I'm never too far away." I tried to play it off. It's hard to live two realities simultaneously. Sometimes I mix up my realities and say the wrong thing. One time I was talking to my real world friends about Felix, forgetting that he doesn't truly exist.

We all hung around camp for a while, tidying up and finishing up the daily chores Pan had set for the day. Pan had yet to make his grand appearance since I've shown up.

"Rumor had it, Y/n, that Pan is avoiding you." Jack, one of the older boys, nudged me.

"Huh? What do you mean avoiding me ?" I picked my head up from the fire and looked at the lost boy.

"I don't know, but no one has seen you for a good two days. Since then he's had this twisted look on his face. Kinda perplexed." He threw sticks into the fire.

You know the saying " speak of the devil and he shall appear"? I tend to think that's true, cause right after Jack said that Pan waltzed in. Everyone went silent, only the crackling of the bonfire could be heard, Aline with the island creatures too.

"Carry on." Pan said. Slowly the noise picked back up. He walked to his tent. The boys started dancing as the sound of the Pan pipe started. Peter played a slow and mesmerizing rendition of the iconic 3 note Peter Pan melody.

"You should go talk to him." Felix sat next to me. I peeled my eyes open as I started to fall asleep.

"About what ?" Pan continued to play soothing songs. He knows how much I love listening to him play.

"Come on. I'm not stupid. I know you like him, and I believe with a best friends intuition that he likes you to." He gave me a comforting smile.

"It would never work anyway." I shrugged.

"You never know. He fronts whoever he's near you. Tries to act tough. But behind closed huts, he thinks about you." Felix stood up and brought me with him. "If things don't work out you can alway, according to Pan "go back to your world". " I felt my body stiffen. No way. I mean, yes Pan somehow knows everything, but he can't know about my world. Or that I even exist outside of Neverland. Might have to make a note about that when I wake up.

I drug myself to Pan's hut and nervously opened the tarp.

"Need some company?" I poked my head in.

"I think you're gonna come in anyway." He sat his flute down and walked to his desk.

"Observant I see." I fully stepped into his room. I had seen his hut before but never fully pictured it. He had a small bed and a decent desk cluttered with papers. He whisked his arm over the desk and the parchment disappeared, most likely to his desk in the Thinking Tree. The thinking tree is his actual home, he only stays in the camp hut for temporary reasons.

"Is there something I can help you with ?" He sighed and turned towards me. Looking directly at me for the first time today. His Forrest green eyes searched my being. I made my way around the hut before sitting on the twin sized bed.

"You haven't spoken to me today." I crossed my legs and cleaned the dirt from under my fingernails. I heard the creaking of his wooden desk from him sitting on it.

"Where do you go ? When you leave here ?"

"I don't-"

"Bullshit." He stopped me. "I know everything Y/n. You often forget that." I folded my hands together and chewed on my lip.

"Something's are unknowable. Even unexplainable." I held my breath and hoped he wouldn't be able to figure anything out. He cracked a smile, he got me. I know magic can pass through the fairytale realms, even to a place where magic certainly doesn't exist ?

"I know you're not really here. In Neverland. You go somewhere else when you disappear for days at a time. Especially that time you left for two weeks. I feel it." He hopped off the desk and walked towards me.

"I'm right here. Sitting in front of you. You're looking right at me." I challenged him. If I learned one thing, it was how to battle with Pan, verbal and physical. I felt my face heat up, my tell.

"I might be looking at you Y/n, but I'm not seeing you. You have this thousand yard stare and sometimes it's like you're not even here." Thousand yard stare ? I just get lost in my own mind sometimes. Unfortunately I fell weak to Peter Pan, no matter what. I could hang with Peter and his games just long enough but I always fell short just before the finish line. Always fumbling the bag.

"You always knew too much for your own good." I smiled sadly. Would I break his heart if I told him he wasn't real in my life ? Even though I had been visiting Neverland for months it felt like years. I felt like I had a second family, I had real fun being with the boys, living in a land of magic was indeed enchanting.

"I know that if we lived in the same reality that maybe we could be together like you want." He stroked my hair and lifted my head to look at him. I tried my hardest to not look at him. He knew, and it broke my heart instead. "Look at me Y/n." I slowly dragged my eyes to look at him, tears filled my waterline.

"Do you think that could actually happen ? Us being together if I was truly here ?" My voice faltered with each word. It feels wrong to ask that. Knowing it's not real to me. I have a real life, not this made up fabricated dream world.

He had moved his index finger from under my chin to my cheek to cup it. He gently stroked his thumb across the area, catching a stray tear. "I think friends don't look at each other the way we do unless we wanted something more." His voice was soft and soothing.

I leaned into his touch and closed my eyes. Everything felt so real. "It could never work. It wouldn't be real. For either of us." His other hand held mine.

"For what it's worth. It feels real when we're together."

So was it wrong for us to lead each other on like that ? Pretending what we had was real ? Maybe so, but neither of us had been happier than in the moments we spent together.

---

But eventually I went back to my reality and left Peter in his. I still get visions in my dream of him, but that's all they are. I haven't even tried to shift in months. But we knew this would happen at some point. You can't postpone the inevitable. Now it's time to move on. Move on from something that never truly happened.

Peter's POV

"She's not coming back. Is she?" Felix stood next to me, staring at her empty hut.

"No. But she'll never forget us. We're always going to be a part of her." Felix nodded and walked off to join the other boys. I'll find where she came from, I'll search for her and bring her back.

Until then I'll watch her hut. Waiting for her to walk out, waiting for her to come home.

[overandundertarot]

What do you have to be grateful for?

There are many things around us that can skip our notice, but add so much magic and meaning into our lives. This reading is intended to bring some of those things to light.

Please keep in mind that this is a general reading so some parts may not resonate for you.

Please pick a picture/card(1-4, going left to right)

PILE ONE:

Cards; Page of swords, Page of cups reversed, 6 of swords.

Pile one, you have to be grateful for the people in your life who force you to take action. You are supported not just physically but spiritually as well. Sometimes you resist the help and signs given to you by your spiritual guides and they want you to know that that frustrates them. They're saying that you should be grateful that they put up with you, lol 💀. There is a lot of spiritual support in your life that has actually allowed you to unkowingly live in ease. For example, if you were supposed to be in a difficult situation eg the repurcusions of your actions, they softened the blow to make it easier for you. Pile one there is someything you're being called to do, something you have to leave for. It's giving you alot of anxiety which is why you may chose to be passive and stagnant but It's for your highest good. It's time to leave the situation. So, Pile one you have to be grateful for the unconditional love and support you have from your spiritual team, and some people in your physical life as well.

PILE TWO:

Cards; 9 of wands, the star reversed, 10 of swords.

Pile two, something you have to be grateful for in your life is that it's not as bad as it looks. You've been fighting for a while and it's beginning to take it's toll on you. Thoughts of despair, hopelessness and abandonement are filling your mind. But you have to be grateful that you've made it out alive. The situation is tough and stressing you out a great deal but there is a way out. Find somehting that can give you peace of mind and use that headspace to try and think of solutions. What you have to be grateful for is that there is a solution, a path of escape for you to follow. You just have to find it.

PILE THREE:

Cards;Wheel of fortune, 9 of cups, 9 of pentacles.

Wowww, pile three can i just say that i love your energy. What you have to be grateful for is that you have worked very hard to develop yourself, you've done a lot of work and have made the necessary sacrifices. Now it's time for you to enjoy the results of your hard work. You're very aware of what you have done and how much it means to you, I get the feeling that youve intentionally placed everything in your life to be the way that it is, and you maintain it with love and care; frienships, material possesions and most importantly yourself. You have trully developed yourself; overcoming trauma, toxic habits etc and now you understand and appreciate what's in your life everyday. Pile 3 you have to be grateful that you did the hard work, and are now receiving and experiencing the wonderful results this brought into your life. If you are not yet experiencing this, this energy is coming in very soon.

PILE FOUR:

Cards;3 of pentacles, 4 of swords, 10 of swords.

Pile 4 you have recently made a comeback or are going to make a comeback of sorts. You have been resting and gathering energy, working on a project or your craft and are now ready to rejoin the world and show it what you've been doing. However, you are plagued with anxiety about this. Something you might have done in the past was ill received and that completely crushed your spirit, so you are still holding that anxiety. What you have to be grateful for are your skills. The way your craft was/is perceived doesn't take away from its inherent value or beauty. It's not a carelessly produced project/craft, but something that you put a lot of love and care into. You must still have faith and present it, im seeing that it will greatly benefit your community and improve peoples lives on an individual level.

***

Thank you for participating in this pick a card reading!

These pictures are not mine, I found them on pinterest!

[iloveslllycatss]

## "𝐖𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐏𝐀𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘"

𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 ! 𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘣𝘺 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘯𝘦 𝘹 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘴 ! 𝘍𝘖𝘙 𝘔𝘓 𝘏𝘈𝘉𝘐𝘉𝘛𝘐 𝘕𝘈𝘋𝘖𝘖𝘕 @sttarzxx 𝘢𝘭𝘴𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘢𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘬, the paraghraph text and response to it was copy and pasted from me and the dude this happened to me withs chat......... 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 ! 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘴𝘵 2 𝘧𝘭𝘶𝘧𝘧, 𝘋𝘠𝘐𝘕𝘎 𝘐𝘕𝘚𝘐𝘋𝘌 (𝘫𝘬)

"im gonna do it. im gonna text him."

you were on vc with your best friend. for context, you had a crush. a MASSIVE crush on a boy named robby. you had liked him for 2 years now, the only bad thing? you guys were barely friends. you guys had a class together, and he would always talk to you (hed call u weird when u declared you were spiderman.).. all until you left school for second semester. you hadnt seen robby in about 6 months, but you still liked him (attachment issues go hard). u guys used to text, too. itd mostly be u texting with double chats and him replying in a dry way... but u still liked him AHAHA, so 2 days ago.. you asked your friend for his number...

"hey"

you texted, and he replied right away

"hi"

after that, you guys had texted for 5 minutes, asking things like "hru" or "wyd" until he finally said

"who even are u?"

your eyes widened seeing this, and you were a pussy, so you said

"im f/n (fake name)"

you guys, for another day kept texting back and fourth.. the only thing is, you acted like u didnt have a clue who he was, what he liked, and what he did.

"i do karate, i think its cool to have balance in your life and karate gave me that."

..... you already knew that, but you couldnt help but act like u didnt.

it was like u two havent met eachother. but little did u know, he was observant as fuck.

"you know u remind me of someone, u text the same as her. her name is y/n"

he said, and ur eyes widened. u couldnt believe that he had memorized your texting style. but you were a pussy, so u denied it.

a couple days go by and u guys still text, you overthink everything he says and you were starting to think your friends were getting tired of you ranting ab it to them all the time. there was this one time where u two had been talking, and the convo? it wasnt good. at all.

"k"

he said, and you furrowed ur eyebrows...

"WYM K?? THATS LIKE THE DRIEST MESSAGE EVER"

....

"yeah ik"

...... what? you couldnt believe it. was he bored of u already? were u being too annoying? were u just a bother?

your heart sunk, and u felt ur knees go weak. not weak in a "i just folded" typa way, but in a "im gonna kms" typa way.

your thoughts kept flooding with things like "i just annoyed him" or "he doesnt want to talk to me anymore." and you wanted to cry.

you start to rant ab it to your friends, balling ur eyes out as u do, you were in ur head about it, letting it get to you. your hands trembled as u typed about it to your friends. you had always been insecure about your personality, not wanting ppl to see u as too much or crazy. so u finally replied to him.

"ok"

its been 15 since youve been on delivered (or read, he didnt have read recipts on)

u desperately wanted to talk to him so u sent anotyher message

"hihii"

when he replied, you got so happy u forgot about the fact that you were crying about him the night before. but the thing is, he would leave u on read the whole day, and it stressed u out.

everyone had been telling u to just tell him who u were, and to stop being a pussy. hell, even snap ai wasnt on your side. so u write a paragraph, wanting to send it to him

"hi robby, so ive been feeling kinda bad recently for this and i hope u forgive me and that this doesnt ruin our 'friendship' kinda thing going on, basically i lied ab like a couple things and i feel bad IFDJNEJN so uh im y/n (u guessed right kinda craz) and IK I LIED AB NOT KNOWING B/F/N BUT I FELT LIKE ITD BECOME AWKS and stuff, f/n is my online name since ion give my real name out (and its a nickname my freinds call me), im sorry for acting like i didnt know who u were i was just being a pussy difjejfn but the truth is i asked b/f/n to send me a bunch of (school name) numbers and u was like the only person (other than 2 girls) who texted me back and I DIDNT KNWO IT WASS U AT FIRST but when u told me who u were i didnt know how to keep the 'friendship' going (r we friends??? idek atp) nd ik this is gonna make everything awkward and stuff but uh yeah im really really sorry for lying 2 u and i hope we can still b friends lol (ts up 2 u//im coming back next year too so idk if that helps EKJFNEIJNF)"

SENT !

... you were stressing atp, would he block u? would he be dry? would he ghost u? say "oh ok"? call u weird and tell everyone?

you didnt know how to feel, you wanted to cry. you were in ur head about this whole situation and u couldnt help but overthink. so u turn to your best friends, wanting-- no, needing reassurance. they continue to tell u its okay and that he wont break your heart. but you cant help it, that feeling. that feeling of your heart sinking, the feeling of the lump that forms in your throat, the feeling where you just want to feel better. but you cant. you were paranoid. you were tearing up. but you forced yourself not to cry, u didnt wnat to be a crybaby, but u couldnt help it. the tears had already formed and started to fall, your vision fogging up and your eyelashes wet. you couldnt believe u thought ur lifew could be like a wattpad love story. you were cracking your knuckles and picking at the skin around your cuticles, something u did when u were stressed. you then went to bed, hoping everything would be okay.

the next morning u wake up. the first thing u do is check every other social media and dm before his, you had a feeling he was gonna make u cry (again).

when u finally open the text, your whole expression lights up.

"I mean I suspected it and I am personally fine with the lie you told and yea I can forgive u but as you know I am a dry texter"

you were so happy. u couldnt believe it. you quickly change his contact name back from "oh" to "ROBBYYY! <33" and you smiled so big your jaw started to hurt

maybe there was a chance.

@/ilovesillycats

plz dont copy my work 😞