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#i know the idea isn't knew but as i thought about it i knew i had to draw it
amiableness · 21 hours
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Peonies ; part two
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Pairing: Theo Nott x Fem!Reader
Summary: Theo has been taking his role of helping reader get over Mattheo very seriously.
Word Count: 4842
Warnings: Unrequited love & Veronica isn't the kindest. Let me know if there's more; I probably forgot something.
A/N 💌 Thank you for your patience with me on this part; I know it took a while! As always, thank you to @moonpascal for reading and sharing your thoughts/ideas with me! Can't wait to hear your thoughts on this chapter!
SERIES MASTERLIST <3
It’s well past midnight when a knock echoes at your door. You sigh, adjusting your shorts as you reluctantly crawl off your bed, leaving your notes sprawled across the covers. As you swing the door open, you find Theo standing there, his gaze lifting from the floor to meet yours. A hesitant smile plays on his lips, as if he’s unsure whether he’s welcome at this late hour.
“Hi.” You greet him with a mix of confusion and warmth, offering a sweet smile. You pull the door open wider, and Theo’s gaze briefly flickers over your tiny sleep shorts and oversized shirt before he meets your eyes again.
“Pansy’s at our dorm.” He says, his voice soft.
You let out a quiet laugh, “I know that.”
He hesitates, searching for the right words. “I just thought... maybe you wouldn’t want to be alone tonight.”
“Oh,” you say, surprised, your lips parting as you glance over your shoulder into your room. Theo’s heart races, a wave of panic surging through him as he mentally scolds himself for not holding back. Offering to stay the night with you felt impulsive, but the moment he saw Pansy enter his dorm, his thoughts had gone straight to you.
“Shit,” Theo shifts uncomfortably, running a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs, the words tumbling out before he can stop them. “I just—when I saw Pansy, I couldn’t help but think you might need someone tonight. But if you’d rather be alone, I can go.”
After you asked Theo to help you get over Mattheo, you wondered if it had been too much to ask of him. But to your surprise, you’ve spent nearly every day of the past three weeks with Theo. You knew he had his own worries—between school, Quidditch, and the pressure from his father. But the morning after you asked for his help, he was there. 
You never expected him to put so much effort into helping you move on from Mattheo, but you couldn’t be more grateful. 
“No,” you quickly respond, a smile spreading across your face as you reach out and grasp his hand, gently tugging him inside. “I’m glad you came.”
Theo visibly relaxes at your touch, allowing you to gently pull him into the room. As the door clicks shut behind him, sealing out the quiet corridor, his initial hesitation melts away. He takes in the familiar surroundings of your room, which, despite being a bit messier than usual, feels even more comforting in the warm, dim light with you.
He swallows his disappointment as you release his hand to clear your bed of scattered notes. Standing there awkwardly, he tries to keep his gaze focused, making an effort not to let his eyes drift down your legs as you lean over to pick up the last piece of parchment.
After you place everything neatly on your desk, you turn to face him, leaning casually against the edge with a soft smile. “Are you okay with sharing my bed again?” you ask, your voice light but sincere. “Or if you’d prefer, I can sleep in Pansy’s bed so you’ll have more room.”
Theo bites his tongue, fighting to keep his voice steady and avoid sounding overeager. He doesn’t want more room; what he wants is to wake up with you pressed close against him, just as he did weeks ago. This time, though, he’s determined to stay and enjoy the feeling of you in his arms.
He clears his throat, “Your bed is fine.”
“I was actually about to head to bed before you knocked, but I can stay up if you wanted to do something.” You offer, your voice gentle and inviting.
Theo shakes his head slightly, a faint smile tugging at his lips, “Thanks, but I’m pretty wiped out from practice today.” He admits, and you can hear the exhaustion seeping through his words.
“You should’ve gone to bed at your dorm, you would’ve been asleep sooner.” You say with a slight frown as you notice just how tired he looks from the day.
“No,” He shrugs. “I wouldn’t have been able to sleep knowing you were here alone.”
If your heart could have melted, it would have done so right then.
Theo's eyes hold yours for a moment longer before he glances away, almost as if he's embarrassed by his own admission. You press your lips together, trying to hide the giddy smile threatening to break through. The idea that he cared that much for you made your insides flutter, warmth spreading through your chest.
Pushing away from the desk, you walk over to your bed and pull back the covers. Theo watches as you crawl in, adjusting the pillows with practiced ease before looking back at him. The unspoken question hangs in the air—are you going to join me?
He hesitates, slowly dropping his bag at the foot of your bed before moving closer to the edge. He’s slept in a bed with a girl before, but this feels wildly different. You make him nervous, and he has no idea how to hide it when he’s this close to you.
You settle into the covers, the mattress dipping slightly under your weight as you shift, and watch as Theo does the same, kicking off his shoes and slipping under the covers beside you.
Once the lights are off, silence settles between you, thick and unspoken. The only sound in the room is the soft rustling of sheets as Theo shifts beside you. You lie on your side, trying to make out his form in the darkness as your eyes slowly adjust. You can tell he’s lying on his back, staring up at the ceiling, lost in his own thoughts.
“I appreciate everything you’ve done for me the past couple weeks.” You say softly, and Theo turns his head to look at you.
“Yeah?”
You hum, reaching out your fingers to brush against his hand, and he takes it without hesitation, his grip warm and reassuring, “Yeah.”
It’s become a habit in the last couple of weeks—intertwining his fingers with yours. He would grab your hand every time he noticed your discomfort around Mattheo and Veronica. And at some point, you just started reaching for his hand yourself. You liked the warmth of his palm against yours and the way he’d brush his thumb over the back of your hand.
“You know I don’t mind, right? Spending all this time with you has been nice. We never really hung out much, just us two.” He says softly.
You nod, feeling a warmth spread through your chest at his words. “Yeah, I know. It’s been nice for me too,” you admit, your eyes meeting his in the dark. You both fall into silence, and it doesn’t take long before you drift off to sleep, your hand still clasped in his.
.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.
Panic hits as you suddenly realize the time—you’re running late. By now, you should already be at breakfast.
“Theo,” you whisper urgently, trying to shift out of his hold. The sheets are tangled around your legs, your back pressed firmly against his chest. His arms are locked around your waist, holding you close, and he’s not loosening his grip. His body is warm against yours, and even as you try to move, his grip tightens slightly, like he’s not ready to let go just yet. “Theo.”
“Dolcezza,” he murmurs, voice rough with sleep, and you freeze at the sound of that deeper, morning rasp. “Quit moving.” His grip tightens just enough to keep you still, his breath warm against the back of your neck.
“We have to get up,” you huff, trying to slip out of his arms, but Theo just pulls you back against him, his hold firm. “We’re late.”
“We’ll just skip.” He mutters, his voice still low and groggy. The idea is tempting—staying wrapped in his warmth instead of braving the cold corridors—but you sigh inwardly, knowing better.
You’d grown used to Theo’s small gestures of affection over the past few weeks, and you’d been just as affectionate in return. But waking up tangled in his arms like this felt different—more intimate. You were certain that once Theo fully woke up, he’d be a little sheepish about how closely he was holding you now.
“We really can’t,” you sigh, trying once more. “We need to get going—” Theo grumbles in response, finally loosening his grip and releasing you. A triumphant smile tugs at your lips as you slip out of bed, quickly heading to get ready. You race through brushing your teeth and pull on your uniform, skipping any attempt at fixing your hair in the rush. By the time you step out of the bathroom, Theo is standing by the bed, just finishing the last button on his shirt, looking just as disheveled as you feel.
You hurry Theo out of your room as he finishes brushing his teeth, and he complies, adjusting his tie as you both sprint toward the Great Hall. Just before entering the bustling breakfast scene, you grab Theo by the arm, pausing to smooth down his disheveled hair. 
“Is it a mess?” He asks, watching you closely as you stand on your toes to thread your fingers through his hair in an attempt to fix it.
“Just a bit,” you smile, stepping back on your heels and giving his hair a final nod of approval. “How’s mine?”
“Pretty,” Theo responds immediately, his gaze lingering. “I’ve never seen your hair like this before.” 
You bite the inside of your cheek to stifle your smile at his compliment. You had let your hair fall naturally, and his reaction makes you feel unexpectedly warm.
You mumble a shy “thank you” before leading the way into the Great Hall, Theo trailing close behind. His cheeks are still tinged pink from the way your fingers had grazed through his hair, and he’s quietly grateful you haven’t seemed to notice. However, his relief is short-lived when he catches Draco’s eye, who immediately notices the pink tint and raises an eyebrow in amused surprise.
As you make your way to the table, Draco leans back in his seat with a smirk, raising an eyebrow. “Well, well, if it isn’t the lovebirds gracing us with their presence.”
“Fuck off.” Theo grumbles under his breath as he lets you slide into your new seat before settling in beside you. Ever since your usual spot had been taken, you’d claimed the one next to Theo, and not just in the Great Hall. You found yourself gravitating toward him in class, the common room—anywhere you could. It had become a quiet, unspoken habit, one that neither of you seemed keen on breaking.
“I should’ve figured that’s where you disappeared to last night,” Enzo says with a knowing smirk. “You two have been spending an awful lot of time together lately, haven’t you?”
You really had. Theo had taken to meeting you outside your last class of the day, content to walk around the castle or lake just so you could avoid witnessing Mattheo and Veronica together. You had learned he was the perfect study partner—far more patient than Mattheo, who would get restless after twenty minutes and start pleading for a break. He seemed to remember every little detail you shared, from how you took your tea to the smallest quirks about yourself.
He’d been so attentive to you that you overheard some girls in the year below talking about how Theo Nott was no longer single.
Theo gives him a flat, unimpressed glare, clearly not in the mood for Enzo's comments, “Yet again, fuck off.”
“Well, have you two got anything to tell us?” Blaise presses, a smug grin tugging at his lips. Theo looks up from serving himself breakfast, shooting Blaise a sharp, warning glance. He could handle the teasing from the boys himself, but he didn't want you to be caught in the crossfire, especially if it made you uncomfortable.
“No.” Theo replies flatly, his gaze flicking to you. You return it with an amused, yet sympathetic smile. Unconsciously, a soft, faint smile tugs at his lips, a detail the boys are quick to notice.
“Are you sure? Because—” Blaise starts but is quickly interrupted.
“I think you two would be perfect together,” Veronica cuts in, her voice dripping with an overly sweet tone as she flashes a saccharine smile. “Don’t you think so, Matty?” she adds, glancing over at Mattheo with a raised eyebrow.
Your eyes meet Mattheo’s for a fleeting moment, and he holds your gaze. You barely registered them, so absorbed in the boys' teasing of you and Theo. For just a moment, there's something unreadable in his gaze—something that makes your heart falter—but it vanishes as quickly as it appeared.
“Yeah,” he agrees, his gaze shifting between you and Theo while Veronica cozies up to him, resting her head on his shoulder. “You two would be.”
A knot tightens in your stomach, and your appetite evaporates. The lightness you’d felt just moments before vanishes, replaced by a heavy weight. Even though you knew Mattheo didn’t have feelings for you, hearing him so openly agree with the idea of you with Theo stings more than you expected.
As long as you’d known him, Mattheo had never been in a serious relationship, let alone had a girlfriend. Now that he was with Veronica, it was painfully clear that you were never truly an option for him. If you had been, he would have made a move. You had dropped hints for years, and his playful flirting had always kept your hopes alive.
But maybe that’s all your relationship was ever meant to be—a friendship with a hint of flirtation. If that’s the case, you needed to move on. Fixating on a guy who now had a girlfriend was a losing battle. If you weren’t careful, you might risk losing the friendship you valued so much.
You’re so caught up in your thoughts, pushing the food around on your plate, that you don’t even hear the chatter of your friends going on around you. It isn’t until Enzo tosses a grape at you that you glance up, “Are you coming tonight?”
You immediately know he’s referring to the Quidditch match. You’d missed the last game, which had surprised everyone, but given your recent mood, it hadn’t been unexpected.
You nod. “I planned on it.”
“Good,” Pansy interjects matter-of-factly. “I missed having you there.” You offer her a smile, but it falters when you see Veronica nudge Mattheo. He clears his throat and turns to you, his expression unreadable.
“Speaking of the game,” Mattheo starts, his voice slicing through the breakfast chatter. “I need my jersey back.”
Your brows knit together in confusion, and it takes you a moment to find your voice, “I don’t understand—”
“My jersey,” Mattheo repeats, his gaze steady as he watches you. “I need it for tonight.”
“Did something happen to yours?” You ask, caught off guard. You’d always kept one of his jerseys while he kept the other. It had become a sort of tradition between you.
Mattheo hesitates momentarily, a flicker of something like regret crossing his features. “No, it’s just... I need it back now.”
“Oh.” You say softly, your voice barely more than a whisper. Veronica’s eyes dart between the two of you, her brow knitting in irritation as she takes in the way Mattheo’s gaze lingers on you.
Theo’s eyes watch you with careful intensity. And when he catches the fleeting hurt in your expression, he reaches out and intertwines his fingers with yours beneath the table, his touch reminding you that he’s there if you need him. You squeeze his hand back immediately.
“I’m wearing it,” Veronica interjects, her tone harsh. “I’m his girlfriend. It would be a bit strange if you kept wearing it.”
Your friends exchange glances, their confusion palpable as they watch Mattheo allow Veronica to speak to you with such disdain. They’ve seen him start fights over someone supposedly speaking badly of you, so this new passivity is surprising. Enzo’s eyes widen in disbelief, and he mouths a quick ‘what the hell’ to Draco, whose puzzled expression mirrors his own.
When you remain silent, Veronica sighs impatiently, “Did you hear me—”
“Yeah, I get it,” you snap, your frustration evident. You turn your gaze back to Mattheo. “I’ll give it to you later.”
.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.
You spent all your classes obsessing over returning Mattheo’s jersey, and no matter how hard you tried, it was getting under your skin. It wasn’t just any jersey—it was the one Mattheo had given you, the one you’d worn countless times. His new relationship with Veronica had stung, but this felt even worse. Maybe it was because taking back the jersey felt like a tangible sign that Mattheo was serious about Veronica, and it drove home the reality of how much things had changed.
Logically, you understood why it was reasonable. Having another girl wear your boyfriend’s jersey would be uncomfortable, and if the roles were reversed, you’d feel the same way. But knowing that didn’t make it any easier. You couldn’t stand Veronica, and the thought of giving up something that meant so much to you—both the jersey and Mattheo—was unbearable.
As you walked back to your dorm, you considered skipping the match entirely. However, you and Pansy had made plans to sit together, and you’d also promised Mattheo you’d return his jersey. As much as you wanted to avoid the situation, you knew you had to go.
You were so irritated as you snatched Mattheo’s jersey off the back of your chair that you hadn’t even noticed the red peonies and green jersey sitting on your bed at first. It wasn’t until you tossed your bag aside and went to fix your hair that the unexpected sight caught your eye.
Your eyes landed on the familiar green jersey, the back facing up so you could clearly see ‘Nott’ stitched in bold, unmistakable letters. A smile tugged at your lips, your earlier frustration fading as you reached for the flowers, their soft petals brushing against your fingers. Carefully, you lifted them, already picturing them in a vase on your desk. 
There’s a card tucked between the blooms, and you smile at Theo’s handwriting: Dolcezza—wear this for me tonight?
Suddenly, the idea of going to the match didn’t seem so dreadful anymore—if anything, it felt like something you could actually look forward to.
.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.
“Finally!” Veronica calls out the moment she spots you, her voice laced with impatience. “I was starting to think you weren’t going to show.” She stands outside the boys' locker room, arms crossed like she's been waiting for ages.
You resist the urge to roll your eyes, “I told Mattheo I would be here.”
“I know,” She says, her tone short, before sticking out her hand expectantly. “I can take that.”
You hesitate, wanting to wait and give it to Mattheo yourself, but you know she’ll be the one wearing the jersey tonight. It feels pointless to hold onto it any longer. With a reluctant sigh, you hand it over, and Veronica’s lips curl into a triumphant smile as she takes it from you.
“Thanks.” She chirps, instantly brighter now that she’s got what she wanted. You watch as she slips the jersey on, and a slight bitterness creeps into your chest at the sight of it on her. She finishes adjusting the jersey and looks up, sending you a smug smirk that makes your stomach twist.
In the last week or so, you've noticed her once-sweet attitude starting to crack. At first, she was nothing but kind, almost to the point where you questioned if it was genuine. But now, the subtle comments slipping through made it clear—she didn’t like you, and you couldn’t figure out why.
Sure, you were close with Mattheo, but if the jersey was any indication, she had no real reason to worry. 
You were nothing but a friend to Mattheo, even though you desperately wished that wasn’t the case.
She eyes the jersey you're wearing, quirking an eyebrow as if she's about to say something snide. You brace yourself, waiting for the comment, but then her face lights up as her attention shifts to something—or someone—behind you.
You turn just as she brushes past you, wrapping her arms around Mattheo’s neck and pulling him down for a kiss. The sight makes your stomach twist, and you quickly avert your gaze, unable to bear watching them. Her giggles fill the air, loud and lovesick, a blatant declaration that he’s hers now.
“Whose jersey are you wearing?” Your eyes snap over to Mattheo, who has one arm around Veronica’s waist as he looks at you curiously. Her arms are tightly wrapped around his neck, and she looks frustrated that his attention is on you. 
“Mine.” You glance over and see Theo approaching, a flicker of relief washing over you. A genuine smile spreads across your face, and before you think it through, you wrap your arms around his shoulders, pulling him into a hug. He looks momentarily surprised but quickly gathers himself, encircling your waist and holding you firmly.
You lean back slightly to meet his gaze, your voice softening. “Thank you for the flowers. Again.”
A warm, gentle smile blooms on his lips, the kind he reserves just for you. “Anytime, dolcezza.”
A moment lingers between you, where your eyes lock and soft smiles play on your lips. But the spell shatters at Veronica's excited squeal of Mattheo's name. You clear your throat, gently pulling away and offering Theo a fleeting smile, even though you sense his disappointment at the loss of your warmth.
Your gaze drifts toward Mattheo, who leans in to press a kiss against Veronica's lips, a pang of longing twisting in your chest. You exhale slowly, then look back at Theo. “Are you nervous?”
“Not really,” he replies with a casual shrug, though you catch a flicker of something beneath his calm exterior. “But if I do get nervous, I’ll just search for the pretty girl wearing my name.”
Your lips part in surprise at Theo’s bold flirting, a playful spark igniting in your chest. You try to mask your smile, but it’s no use—Theo sees right through you, a knowing grin spreading across his face as he revels in your reaction.
“Good luck. I’ll wait for you after.” You lean in, nearly whispering as you press a kiss against Theo's cheek, but in your nervousness, your lips brush against the corner of his mouth instead. The contact sends a spark of warmth through you, but before he can react, you pull away, leaving him to watch you walk off, the letters of his last name boldly displayed on your back.
He stands there for a second, staring after you, but as he turns to leave, he catches sight of Mattheo, who is watching you with an intensity that makes his heart sink.
.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。.
You’re exhausted. Keeping track of both Mattheo and Theo is proving to be more tiring than you anticipated. You're used to focusing solely on Mattheo during the game, but tonight, your attention keeps shifting to Theo.
“Are you even listening to her?” Pansy scoffs, jabbing you in the ribs.
The unexpected nudge jolts you from your thoughts, and you turn to her, puzzled. “What?”
“Veronica. Are you paying attention?” Pansy glances over, raising an eyebrow.
You shake your head, “No. I didn’t even realize she was sitting nearby.”
“Listen to her. She’s been bragging about Mattheo.” That catches your attention. You follow Pansy’s finger as she points, and your gaze lands on Veronica a few rows ahead. As you focus, her voice cuts through the noise of the crowd, loud and unmistakable, carrying clearly despite the distance.
“Do you even know how long I waited to get him?” Veronica’s voice rises above the noise, smug and self-satisfied. You glance over just in time to see her gather her hair into a high ponytail, making sure the name on her back is fully visible. “Honestly, the effort was exhausting,” she adds with a dramatic sigh, as if she’s endured a great hardship.
The girls around her practically explode with excitement, bombarding her with questions—how did she do it? How long did it take? What’s he like? Their voices blend into a high-pitched buzz, and you roll your eyes, feeling the irritation build as you turn your attention back to the match, hoping to tune them out.
Pansy nudges you again, her voice low and insistent. “Keep listening.”
“No.” You grit out.
Pansy sighs, “Why not?”
You exhale sharply. “Because I really don’t want to hear her go on and on about him anymore.” The bitterness in your voice is hard to hide, but you don’t care. You’re too tired of hearing his name on her lips.
“You’ve barely listened!”
“It was enough for me.”
“There’s something off about the way she talks about him,” Pansy pushes, leaning in to try and catch your eye, but you continue looking forward and watching Theo. “I don’t like it.”
“I mean, I don’t either. But I’m not going to keep listening in.” “Why?” Pansy cries out incredulously, gaining the attention of some people around you.
“Because I’m supposed to be getting over him, and I don’t think listening in as his girlfriend talks about him will do that.”
“But what if somethings off? What if she’s blackmailing him or something?” Pansy asks, before she gasps and turns to face you fully. “What if he’s dating her to make you jealous?”
“Do you really think Mattheo Riddle would allow someone to blackmail him? And secondly, I don’t think that’s the case.”
“You never know. I always thought he had feelings for you.”
“Pansy. This is what I’m talking about,” You snap, sending a warning look to your best friend. “Mattheo can take care of himself, you and I both know that. There’s no way I’ll ever get over him if I start making up theories about why he’s with his girlfriend. Veronica’s a bitch, we know that, but that doesn’t mean she’s not with him for a genuine reason.”
Pansy exhales in frustration, adjusting in her seat as she finally turns her attention to the match. “Alright, I get it. I'll just share my theories with Blaise from now on.”
A smirk tugs at your lips as you imagine Blaise enduring the same conversation, likely rolling his eyes in exasperation, “Fine by me.”
.·。.·゜✭·.·✫·゜·。. Thanks to Theo's swift catch of the Snitch, Slytherin secured the win, and the stands erupted in cheers. You'd screamed so loudly in celebration that you're certain he heard you, even from across the pitch. The thrill of the moment filled you with energy, and you felt a surge of pride as he glanced your way after the catch.
You were eager to congratulate him, but held back, letting the others swarm him first. Instead, you were leaned against the wall outside the locker room, waiting for a moment alone with him. As you stood there, it wasn’t long before your mind wandered. You found yourself watching him from afar—his chest still heaving from the intensity of the match, hair tousled and damp with sweat. There was something about the way he looked after a game that had your thoughts trailing off in a completely different direction.
Had Theo Nott always been this gorgeous?
When he turns and catches your eye, you fully expect him to give the usual 'wait a minute' gesture, like Mattheo always does. But instead, to your surprise, Theo pushes straight through the crowd. In an instant, he's in front of you, pulling you up into his arms. You let out a shriek of his name through laughter, completely caught off guard by the sudden hug, his embrace warm and tight as if he'd been waiting for this moment all along.
“You did so good!” You cry out as he sets you down. When he grins at you, it’s almost enough to make you swoon; the sight of post-match Theo is something you hadn’t realized you’d been missing. The blend of adrenaline and joy radiating from him leaves you momentarily breathless.
“It’s because you wore my jersey,” he shrugs, a teasing glint in his eyes. “I didn’t get to say it earlier, but you look really good in it.”
You nearly melt, “Does that mean I get to wear it at the next game?”
“Please do, dolcezza,” he says, his tone suddenly softer, the endearment dripping with warmth like honey. There’s a sincerity in his gaze that sends a flutter through your chest. “You make it look far better than I ever could.”
You don’t get the chance to respond as Enzo suddenly appears by his side, rambling on about something animatedly. With a quick tug, Enzo pulls Theo away, but not before he glances back, shouting over his shoulder about how he’ll see you tonight.
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Could you do Spencer x reader where he’s holding a cast party and reader goes to his home to help get the party ready and confesses that she is attracted to him and he likes her back (Smut/ cute Fluff if possible)
Or could you do where the reader is starting to show her baby bump/ tell Spencer she’s pregnant? Thank uuu
Party with a surprise || Spencer Reid
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· Pairing: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader
· Category: fluff, smut-fluff, Angst
· Warning: Sex, pregnancy, body-shaming
· Words: 4854
· Summary: You and Spencer are really close, and lately, you've been hanging out a lot. You're excited to help him set up his party, hoping to spend more time with him. You had no idea things would change so quickly between you two.
· Spanish on Wattpad. English isn't my first language, be kind!
· Masterlist
"Hey, have you sent animated invitations to everyone for Saturday’s party?"
You heard a voice complaining behind you as a coffee flew through the air and landed in your hands.
"Yes, don’t you like it? They turned out pretty good, didn’t they?"
"Big social event at Spencer Reid's house. Please be on time, if you've been invited it's because you're a very special person… The time, the day... the address... a heart, another one... moving animals... very creative, yes." He complained, barely holding back a laugh.
"I think it was successful… everyone liked it, they all confirmed their attendance, by the way. You’re welcome for the help," you responded sarcastically.
He hadn’t asked for help with the party, but you wanted to do it. It wasn’t something he would normally do, though you thought it was great, and it was as good an excuse as any to spend time together. You’d been friends for a long time, but lately, you’d been feeling more attracted to him than usual, something you tried to deny to yourself.
"I didn’t ask for it, no need, really, just you coming is enough." You knew he didn’t mean to bother you, which only made him more adorable.
"I’ll be there early on Saturday to help with everything. And don’t try to argue! I know you." You said with a cheeky smile but a certain authoritative tone, and he couldn’t help but smile too.
On Saturday, you arrived at his house at four sharp, loaded with bags full of decorations, food, and drinks. You climbed the stairs, feeling sweat trickling down your back and your heart racing. You wanted to look perfect for him. Once at the top, you dropped everything with a sigh. Your hair was a bit tousled, and your cheeks were flushed. Just as you were about to fix yourself up, the door opened.
"Hey… What are you doing…?" A shy smile appeared on his lips.
"N-nothing... I was… resting. I carried all these things up." You were still panting.
"You should’ve called me! You’re so stubborn... You’re early." He protested as he helped you bring in the bags.
"There’s a lot of decorating to do... Why are you throwing a party if you're going to complain so much?"
"Okay, okay, sorry. I’m just nervous. You... You look really pretty, by the way."
Your eyes widened, and you fought to keep your cheeks from turning red.
"Oh… Thanks…" You turned away, trying to hide the fact that the comment affected you, and started taking things out of the bag. "Come on… Help me..."
Before you could finish your sentence, Spencer was beside you, helping you take out the decorations and placing them on the table. His arm brushed against yours, and it was affecting you more than you'd like to admit.
"Hey, look." Spencer wrapped your head with a garland. "It really suits you," he said with a laugh. You were standing quite close, and your heart raced at his adorable gesture.
"Oh, so funny." You put a bow on his head. "Now you’re a gift."
He smiled when you didn’t pull away. He looked at you intently and, with a moment of bravery, said, "I don’t mind if I’m a gift for you."
Your cheeks flushed, and you lowered your gaze, feeling your heart pound. You didn’t expect such a direct declaration. Was he openly flirting with you? Was Spencer Reid flirting? He was, and you liked it, but the idea of crossing that line with your best friend terrified you.
As you both decorated the living room, the tension between you increased with every accidental touch and prolonged glance. Your body responded instinctively to his closeness, but a part of you fought to maintain distance. When you finished, you both sat on the couch.
"Have you thought about the music? Parties have music, Spence..." You grabbed your phone and searched for a lively playlist.
"Good thing you’re here, or else…" Suddenly, you felt his hand gently stroke your arm, casually, as if it were something he did all the time. You glanced at his hand out of the corner of your eye but tried to ignore it, focusing on your phone, but your body betrayed you, and your skin tingled at his touch. You looked up and realized he was much closer than you thought. The tension was palpable, like that typical movie moment where the protagonists kiss. You felt it, you wanted it, and you could tell he did too. But oh, right... just as you were about to get closer, the doorbell rang—a timely yet inconvenient coincidence. You both cursed internally; it was clear on your faces.
"I’ll get it..." Spencer said as he stroked your arm once more, pressing gently. You didn’t know what they had done to your friend and colleague. He was so bold, so confident, you couldn’t believe it, though you loved it.
When he opened the door, Penelope burst in, with Derek and JJ following behind.
"Heyyy!" The blonde greeted cheerfully.
"How’s it going, lovebirds? I brought this," Derek placed something to drink on the table.
JJ entered and sat in the living room, looking at you curiously when she saw your frown. She smiled.
Soon, the others arrived, and honestly, you were all having a great time. You kept handling the music for everyone's sake, and watching Morgan and Garcia break into dance quickly got the party going. Rossi pulled you out to dance, Emily and JJ made amusing comments, and Hotch stayed off to the side, sipping his drink and "smiling" at the spectacle. But noticing how Spencer never took his eyes off you for a second made your heart race non-stop. If there hadn’t been music, everyone could have probably heard your heartbeat.
You spent the whole night flirting, glances here and there, a touch now and then, a subtle comment whenever one of you got close to the other… Tonight you felt like you were on cloud nine. You went to Spencer’s room, where you had all left your personal things, to grab some lip balm from your purse. As you were about to leave, you bumped into him.
"Oh..! You scared me... Sorry."
"Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you." Spencer had a relaxed smile on his face. He had followed you, clearly wanting to be alone with you, and at that point, you had no control over your nerves.
"N-no, it’s fine..."
"You still… still haven’t danced with me," he said, raising his eyebrows, giving you those puppy-dog eyes that made you melt. You hadn’t really been aware of it until now. And suddenly, you realized you were in his room, in the dark, with only the light from outside and the sound of the music from the living room and your friends having fun.
"No, you don’t dance..." You said with a nervous giggle.
"I would dance with you," he replied, stepping closer.
The shy laugh that escaped you as you lowered your head, embarrassed, seemed like more than enough of a sign for him to approach, with a soft but determined touch on your waist. His touch was slow, cautious, waiting for any sign of doubt or rejection, but that never came. Instead, your hands slowly moved up his arms, tracing the path to his shoulders, and you were completely pressed together as you started a slow, swaying dance.
Your gazes locked, trapping you in the warmth of his brown eyes that seemed to speak without words. Slowly, he leaned his face toward yours until your foreheads touched. He smiled—a smile full of tenderness you could see even with the dim light that entered, making you shiver.
With a slight movement of his foot, he closed the door, isolating the two of you from the rest of the world. The darkness surrounding you seemed to intensify your heartbeat. His hands, which had rested on your waist, began to slowly slide down, while yours, almost without realizing it, moved up to his neck, seeking more closeness.
Your noses brushed in a sweet, innocent gesture, but it was loaded with restrained desire. Your bodies, once swaying in sync, now moved erratically, but in that lack of coordination, there was something deliberate, as if every small accidental touch was a game you both wanted to keep playing. You could feel it—his body reacting, and yours responding to his touch.
Almost at the same time, you both leaned in, meeting in a kiss that, though passionate, was slow, delicate. With each touch, each caress of his lips on yours, you felt your mind fog, and time seemed to stop, letting only your deepest instincts guide the moment. Your tongues tangled together, while Spencer’s hands tenderly caressed the rest of your body, pulling it as close to his as he could, wanting to treat it with all the care in the world, and that’s when he seemed to realize he wanted to kiss every part of you. There was nothing innocent about the way your tongues intertwined, exploring each other with a sweetness that made you feel like you were floating. Spencer’s hands were careful, starting to explore your body with the same tenderness with which he kissed your lips.
He pushed you gently against the door, his ragged breath hitting your skin as he began a trail of kisses down your neck, slowly descending to your collarbone. Each kiss ignited a spark, making your thoughts completely vanish. The softness with which he treated you was a delicious contradiction; his kisses were soft, but the desire only made you burn more.
In the background, you barely heard the music and distant voices. Laughter, conversations, even Derek’s booming laughter or Garcia’s loud voice faded away. All that mattered was him and how his hands drew you closer to his body, as
In the background, you could barely hear the music and distant voices. Laughter, conversations, even Derek's loud laughter or García's booming voice faded away. All that mattered was him, and the way his hands pulled you closer to his body, as if he never wanted to let you go.
With a gentle movement, you pulled Spencer, and the two of you fell onto the bed. You on your back and him on top of you, his lips never stopped moving across your skin. A mixture of desire and tenderness filled every second. His body against yours enveloped you, not just physically, but emotionally, as you felt the intensity that only kept growing. And there, while Spencer's hands continued to explore your body with that infinite devotion, you knew that moment was just yours, perfect in its mix of passion and love.
His lips didn’t stop exploring every part of you they could reach, while his ragged breathing brushed your skin with an intoxicating warmth, the way his mouth lingered on your skin was slow, but filled with an intensity that made you shiver. Your hands weren’t still. They slid to his hair, tangling in it, tugging slightly, trying to feel him even closer. You could feel how every one of his movements seemed intentional, designed to make you feel loved and desired at the same time. He paused occasionally, breathing deeply. The silence in the room, broken only by whispers, shallow breaths, and the music in the background, became even more palpable when his lips finally met yours again in a deeper, more desperate kiss.
His hands rested on your face, caressing your cheek with an overwhelming softness. He looked into your eyes as his breathing steadied slightly, and then, in a low and husky voice, he said, "You can’t imagine how much I love you." His confession hung in the air, filling it with a warmth that pierced your heart.
You shivered, your body trembled, and your mind went blank. In that moment, it felt like you were floating away, all the feelings you'd been ignoring, and there he was, confessing that he loved you and making you feel like the most desired person in the sweetest way.
As his lips met yours again, Spencer couldn’t help but smile against your mouth. There was something mischievous in that gesture, something that seemed to remind you both that you'd been away from the party for too long. Your stomach fluttered, and you said, "I love you too, Spencer." The urgency started to grow more palpable. His body on top of yours pressed slightly, as if time itself was conspiring to make sure nothing and no one interrupted that moment.
Between kisses, soft laughter, and ragged breaths, he whispered in your ear, with a warm and conspiratorial tone: "They're going to look for us... they must be wondering where we are by now."
"Let them wonder," you replied with a half-smile, almost panting, as you pulled him closer, making your bodies fit together even more. You felt the heat on your skin, the fast beat of his heart, and in that moment, nothing else mattered. There were no longer just brushes of skin, his hands sought your breasts, caressing them beneath your clothes as he kissed your neck.
The hand that had been exploring your torso moved down to your abdomen, unbuttoning your pants. His hands began to slide more firmly over your waist, moving down, pulling off your pants and underwear. Despite the urgency you both felt, there was a softness in his touch that countered the fast pace of his kisses. It seemed like every gesture, every caress, was filled with love and devotion.
Between kisses, Spencer paused his mouth near your ear. "Tell me if you want me to stop..." His voice was a deep whisper, filled with that perfect mix of desire and respect, his words echoed in your mind as you bit your lip.
"No… Don't stop," you responded quickly, your fingers tangling even tighter in his hair, pulling him closer to you. You got rid of his belt, and his hands moved even faster, exploring every part of you, while his mouth reclaimed yours in a deeper kiss, full of that urgent desire. You knew that at any moment someone could knock on the door or ask about you two, but that only seemed to speed things up. You shivered when, in one swift movement, you felt him make you completely his.
Spencer breathed against your neck, his lips moving up and down, leaving a trail of kisses that made your skin burn with each touch. Between whispered moans of pleasure, you felt how his movements became faster, more intense, but never lost the sweetness that had characterized every touch, every kiss.
"You're perfect," he whispered against your lips, his voice ragged from the intensity of the moment. His hot breath brushed your skin as he kissed you over and over, his hands gripping you as if he didn’t want that moment to slip away.
You felt it too; that delicious mix of urgency and emotional connection that made you wish time would stop. As your bodies moved in unison, Spencer kept his eyes closed, as if that allowed him to thrust with more force, as if he wanted to savor every second. But when he opened them, he looked at you with such intensity that it almost took your breath away.
Words were replaced by unintelligible whispers, small confessions of love and desire that escaped between quick breaths. The urgency that had started when you fell on the bed now reached its peak, but even in those most intense moments, Spencer never stopped being tender. His hands, which gripped you more tightly, still kept that softness that made you feel protected and loved.
Finally, the moment culminated in an explosion of sensations, and he had to cover your mouth with his hand between laughs to keep quiet, though luckily the music was loud. The two of you clung to each other, breathing together, sharing the heat and the rapid beat of your hearts. Spencer buried his face in your neck, breathing deeply as he tried to calm down, letting his hand that had been over your lips fall.
After a few moments, both of you started laughing softly, your bodies still close. Spencer sat up just enough to look into your eyes.
"They definitely suspect something," he said, but his tone was light, playful. He didn’t seem too worried.
"I don’t care," you replied, laughing, as you caressed his neck.
That night meant something new for both of you. Monday morning when you arrived, he was there, and you looked at each other nervously, unsure of what to say. You had confessed your love to each other in the middle of the frenzy and hadn’t talked about it afterward. For the rest of the party, you were affectionate, more than usual, and of course, your friends noticed your absence and the playful flirting afterward. You didn’t escape the teasing comments either.
“Hey, lovebirds, here,” Derek handed each of you a drink. “You need to replenish your fluids.” My face turned as red as a tomato, and Spencer laughed, lowering his gaze.
“Morgan... leave them alone, don’t be cruel,” JJ was at least on our side, thankfully.
“I love it when there are new couples! The beginnings are so beautiful!!” García is undoubtedly the team’s biggest blabbermouth. I didn’t know where to hide, and I couldn’t understand why Spencer wasn’t feeling awkward about the situation.
“Alright, alright... Guys, stop, y/n’s going to bolt,” Rossi gestured with his hands as if calming everyone down. “So, where were we? Can someone turn up the music and bring me another drink?” Emily had definitely taken over a couch and was in her happy place.
After the party, I went home. JJ, Emily, and I took an Uber. Spencer and I said goodbye normally; I think we were embarrassed, with everyone there, we didn’t know how to behave. And for the rest of the weekend, we didn’t talk again.
When we saw each other again on Monday, it was a bit awkward. He greeted me when he saw me, and I didn’t know how to react.
“Hi.”
“Hi.”
“How are you...?” He seemed like he wanted to say something more, but I think he was feeling the same as me.
“Uh, uh... I’m fine, and you...?”
“I... Well, I’m fine...” There was a pause. “Actually, no, I’m not.”
“You’re not? Okay, why not?” You thought this was the stupidest conversation you’d ever had.
Even with the silly conversation you were having, you cursed when you were interrupted.
“Hey, Reid, I need you to come with me to a crime scene.” Damn Morgan, he’s always so freaking inconvenient.
You spent the whole day at the office nervously trying to do the profile, but you didn’t make much progress. You kept glancing at the door. “Where had they gone?” you wondered.
It wasn’t until the middle of the afternoon that Reid appeared, exhausted from running all over the city, collapsing into his chair. When you saw him, you moved closer, sitting in the chair next to him.
“Hey... how did it go? You took a while.” You were worried when you saw his tired face, and you had the urge to hug him.
He slouched further in the chair. “It went well, it was just a long investigation. I’m tired,” his eyes locked on yours. “I... wanted to see you.”
You tried to contain a smile that was fighting to come out, but you lost the battle. Spencer gave you one in return, sincere, kind. And you saw him extend a hand, inviting you to take it. You didn’t think much about it; you wanted to feel his electrifying, warm, and comforting skin against yours again.
“The day felt so long without you.” You were starting to lose filters; you didn’t want them with him.
“It’s been endless. The thing is, I’ve had something on my mind all day, and I need to ask you.”
“Oh, okay... Go ahead, ask.” You were a nervous wreck, but you acted normal.
“Um... You and I... ? Are we... are we boyfriend and girlfriend...?”
Your smile grew wider without meaning to; you found it so adorable how he was asking to be your boyfriend, how he wasn’t sure if he already was after what had happened. He was sweet even for this. Though to be honest, you didn’t really know either.
“Hm... I’d like that... Do you... do you want to be my boyfriend...?” You asked with a bit of hesitation.
He gently pulled on the hand you had grabbed a few minutes ago, and with the other, he cupped your face and kissed you with a softness and tenderness that made you melt. Yes, he definitely wanted to be your boyfriend.
You spent a few dreamlike months together. You were in love, enjoying your time like any newly-started couple: many hours in bed, just as many out walking, countless more on the couch reading and eating chocolate ice cream like you loved so much, enduring the comments and teasing from your friends... You had been together for a month and a half, and for the last few days, you hadn't been feeling well. Some dizziness and more exhaustion than usual, though you didn’t think much of it.
A week later, and suddenly, the foods you once loved were making you feel sick. Everything disgusted you. By the time two months had passed, the lack of sleep and food, along with body aches, was getting to you.
"Hey, you've not been feeling well lately, babe. We’re going to the doctor," he insisted, kind but firm.
"Seriously, just leave it, these past few weeks have been stressful. I just need to finish this case."
"Stress? You can’t stop moving at night, your back hurts, you're irritable, you're not eating... It’s like…" His face changed completely, becoming sad.
"Like what…?"
"We started dating, and now you… Is this all because you don’t want us to be together? Do you want to go back?"
"W-what?" My eyes were wide. Had I made him think that? I had been so focused on myself that I hadn’t noticed how he was feeling. "NO! I love you! Do you hear me?" I grabbed his face, forcing him to look at me.
Spencer nodded slowly and rested his forehead against mine. "I love you too. I’m just worried you’re not okay."
"You’re so adorable I could die right now, you know that?" His laugh, with his forehead still pressed against mine, made him even more adorable. He didn’t know.
A couple more weeks passed, maybe three, you weren’t sure. There was so much chaos in your life—working at the BAU had its downsides: traveling, long hours, constant outings... You hadn’t noticed a pattern until today. You had spent the last five mornings throwing up your coffee. “Sht…” you thought. Suddenly, you became aware of everything else: you were wearing leggings because your jeans were too tight, the aches, the fatigue, the chest pain, the nausea... “Fck… This can’t be, this can’t be…”
You panicked and got dressed quickly, trying not to think about it anymore. When you arrived at the bullpen, JJ showed up with some donuts and offered you one, but you refused as soon as the smell hit your nose.
“Ugh… no thanks, JJ…”
“Oh, alright… I’ll save one for later.” JJ looked at you closely.
“Hey, for how little you’re eating, you’re looking extra huggable. Love looks good on you,” Morgan joked about the obvious change in your body, and it crushed you. It was an innocent comment, seemingly positive, but you couldn’t take it.
“S-sorry, I need to go to the bathroom, guys.” You rushed off, the door closed behind you, and you started crying uncontrollably.
A few seconds later, someone came in. “Hello…? Hey…” JJ was fully aware of what was happening to you. She had been watching for a while—she had gone through the same thing. “Wanna tell me what’s going on?”
“I screwed up, JJ…”
“Well… It’s not exactly that, right?”
“How could I not use…? Damn it, I should’ve known better. I forget to take the pill sometimes. I’m so scatterbrained, and with the time changes, the trips… What do I do?!”
“Hm, I think you two need to talk, honestly. You love each other, don’t you? It’ll be okay.” JJ seemed so calm, and it was actually helping you, but all you wanted to do was scream.
The rest of the day, you were a bit distant with everyone, even with Spencer, who seemed worried about you. He tried to take care of you without overwhelming you too much, always attentive to your needs. He always did that, but now he wanted to make sure you felt better; leaving water on your desk, lollipops you liked next to your monitor, hand cream… At the end of the day, he approached you.
"Hey, um, would you… do you want to come over to my place today?" You could see his concerned, almost pleading expression.
That automatically brought a small smile to your face. "Of course, I want to. Let’s go."
When you arrived, you were determined to talk to him, no matter how hard it might be.
"Um, Spence, can we talk? I need to tell you something." Your face was full of complete and utter distress.
Spencer let out a deep sigh, took your hand, and gently led you to the couch, inviting you to sit beside him. His attitude struck you as odd, though he was always tender with you.
"Alright, uh… I have something important to tell you," you said firmly. You wanted to be direct, not knowing any other way to do it.
"I know what's going on." His face, though serious, radiated affection, empathy, and kindness.
"Oh. Uh… How do you… know?"
"If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s recognizing patterns. And for the past three months, you’ve had some pretty obvious symptoms: nausea, vomiting, aches, fatigue, gaining a bit of volume…" He squeezed your hand, and a small smile appeared on his face.
You felt like you were breaking slowly. "Why… didn’t you say anything?" Your voice sounded high-pitched, on the verge of tears.
"I was giving you space, I thought you needed it. At first, I thought you were sick, and then I realized that wasn’t it. I just wanted you to come to me when you were ready…" Your face was a mix between a pout and a smile.
"It’s just… I didn’t notice, it’s not that I didn’t want to tell you, I just wasn’t aware. My god, what a stupid thing… Not even with my body, my clothes don’t even fit."
"Your body is perfect, I love it, no matter what it is now or what it will be, I’ll love it always. I love you in all your forms." He lifted your hands and kissed them with his eyes closed, showing all the devotion he felt for you. Your heart felt like it was going to burst out of your chest, and a huge smile spread across your face.
"Look, I haven’t actually taken a test yet, so I don’t know if I really am or not… I also don’t know if… I mean, what now? If it’s real, what are we going to do? I can’t think of anything else right now; it’s like everything is foggy—my work, the future, us…"
"Okay, okay, okay… Stop. Listen. Tomorrow we’ll go to the doctor, and this time you can’t say no. Once we know more, you can decide what you want. I want you to know that I love you and I want to share my life with you. The idea of starting a family together makes me really happy, but what matters most is that we’re okay together." Tears streamed down your cheeks, maybe because of the hormone cocktail, or the mix of happiness, love, fear, uncertainty… and he wiped them away with his fingers, placing a gentle kiss on your lips.
"Everything is going to be okay." His words soothed your hyperactive mind. "I love you."
"I know." You said, gently holding his wrists, wanting to keep him close.
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𝜗𝜚 A Lie Matter.
Spencer Reid x Prentiss!reader
Series masterlist | ONE | TWO | THREE |
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Summary: All Spencer wanted was to have you back, but when it happens, it's the opposite of what he and you thought it would be.
Words: 3,6k.
TW: mentions of crime, trauma, death and pain (normal warnings in the series). so much spoilers for s6 and s7. the events narrated occur after emily's "death". so MUCH angst. read the dates carefully, especially the years, because there are some backward time frames that can confuse you if you don't pay attention!. english isn't my first language (sorry for my mistakes, be kind please).
Note: Okay, if I apologized for the first part, I have to get down on my knees for this one, because it is even more bitter (sorry Emily and Spencer, too).
I ask you to put yourselves in everyone's shoes and refrain from hateful comments. The process of writing this was emotionally challenging for me because I recognize that everyone has a valid point of view.
♡ Enjoy! ♡
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December 5th, 2010
Your brow furrowed as you opened a new tab on your computer and watched it freeze for a few seconds. You were not very knowledgeable about technology and thought that perhaps a technical analyst could be of assistance. You were somewhat surprised when you suddenly felt a pair of warm arms around you from behind the sofa.
On the bright side, it wasn't all bad. At least not if you had him on your side.
“Hey.” You said, smiling slightly as you felt Spencer rest his head on your shoulder. “I thought you were reading.”
“Yeah, but you looked really focused and I wanted to know what you were doing.” He replied, carefully sitting down next to you on the couch, not wanting to invade your space. You looked at him with some amusement. “I'm just curious.”
He gazed at your computer screen, his heart aching a little as he noticed you were browsing a travel site, exploring different destinations and planning your budget. Had you decided to leave? He wondered why you hadn't told him sooner. Were you planning to leave him?
“Are you planning to leave?” He finally asked, after a few seconds of trying to decide whether to pursue the matter further. “Did something happen?”
The question he really wanted to ask, and feared to ask, was: Did I do something?
But no, Spencer wasn't going to self-destruct or assume things this time. He trusted you and he trusted that you would tell him if something was wrong because that was the kind of relationship the two of you had built.
“It's my mother's gift to me.” You replied quickly, as if to avoid the subject. “For my birthday.” You added as you noticed he looked confused.
“A trip?”
“Yes, when I was younger, I wanted to see the whole world and my mother promised that someday I would.” You began to explain, trying to avoid his gaze at first so as not to show too much vulnerability. Suddenly he took your hand in support. “Since I was fourteen, she's given me a trip every time...she doesn't know that I don't even have that dream anymore.”
“What is your dream now?” He asked with a genuine curiosity that made you feel small under his gaze.
You paused for a moment and smiled at him. “Is it too cheesy if I say it's you?”
“It's sweet.” Spencer couldn't help but blush a little and let out a laugh and then get a little more serious. “What's your dream?”
It was a new question, so you weren't quite sure how to answer. It was unusual because no one had ever asked you that before, or at least not with such a genuine interest in your answer.
“Other than you? I think just peace of mind. Maybe a family, a dog, and a nice house. The usual.” You rambled a bit, unsure. “To be honest, I've had the same dreams as my sister all my life. I've always copied them, even the FBI idea. But we already know that didn't work out so well for me.” You faked a laugh and pointed to your leg.
You expected him to laugh, the last thing you wanted was a look of pity or a deepening of your childhood problems. But you knew him well enough to know that he wasn't the kind of person to let things go, he literally couldn't forget them.
“Don't feel sorry for me, please.” You said as you noticed how his caresses on your arm were getting softer and softer.
“It's not that. I just don't like it when you treat yourself badly.” He explained calmly. “You were good at the FBI anyway. You're good at everything.”
You let out a bitter little laugh. “I was only 'good' because my sister taught me how to fight. And without being able to do that, I'm no good.” You pointed with a smile on your face, not wanting to worry him. “But it's okay, you have the brains.”
“And you're smart, funny, pretty, and-” He started listing your attributes at a surprising pace, which made you stop him with a kiss.
He is deeply moved when he experiences the sensation of your lips on his. Your kisses always leave him feeling profoundly cherished. They are characterized by a gentle, soft, warm, and tender quality that makes him feel like he is the most precious thing in the world to you. It is enough to send an intoxicating wave of emotions through him, filling every inch of his body with warmth.
“Thank you.” You gave him a smile when your lips parted.
“I had a lot more to say.” He said, still a little flushed. He then tucked a lock of hair behind your ear, as if he wanted to see you better. “I could go on for days.”
You just smiled at him like you were head over heels, feeling like you could say 'I love you' right then and there.
But you didn't. Unfortunately, you were too afraid to do it that time.
March 29th, 2011
“Aren't you planning to eat?” Your sister asked you for the third time, taking a big sip of her coffee and looking at the croissant you still had untouched on your plate.
You shifted uncomfortably in your seat and tried to cross your arms, but the wounds in your stomach still caused discomfort and you had to stifle a groan with a poor excuse. “I'm not hungry.”
Emily didn't say anything at first, just watched you, made you feel like just another criminal she was carefully profiling.
The two of you had been enjoying breakfast together at the table for several minutes without engaging in conversation. The dining room was peaceful, with only the sound of the clock on the wall to gently remind you that time was passing, whether you wanted it to or not.
And you really hoped the time would pass quickly so you could go home soon. But not fast enough for the people you loved to put you in the memory box that never opens.
“Can we have a normal conversation?” She asked, trying to break the awkward silence.
“I'm listening.” You finally make eye contact and stop looking out the window at the Eiffel Tower to look at her.
Then she gave that stern mother look, and you knew you were in trouble. “You have to eat. If you want, we can order something else.”
You didn't say anything, just looked at her tired face and sighed a little, feeling a twinge of guilt for not accepting her attempts to make the atmosphere more pleasant. You didn't know how to tell her that your frustration and pain went far beyond the physical, that it was something you felt in your heart and that no special food or doctor could fix. Everything was already taking its toll on you.
“I know this is tough, but please don't make it worse. I'm here for you.” She put her hand over yours and gave you a little squeeze, trying to show support. “We're in this together. You have me to lean on.”
You couldn't help but frown. Now she seemed so open with you, it was surprising to think of all the secrets she had kept from you before. There was literally a part of her life you didn't know about. She hid from you for years that she was on a covert mission, that she was babysitting someone else's child from afar, and that a terrorist was one of the ghosts that kept her on the defensive from everyone, including you. And none of that was the worst of it, because that place was occupied, because she didn't even seem to care how that affected you.
You had always been too much for everyone but Emily. She had always known how to carry your weight as if it were no obligation.
At least, that's the way it used to be.
“I know you miss Spencer. I do, too. But I promise you, he's fine.” She interrupted you when she noticed that your voice trailed off and your eyes glazed over, as if you were about to burst into tears just hearing his name. “He's safe.”
Mentioning him so suddenly was like walking through a minefield and hoping a bomb wouldn't go off.
“He thinks we're dead.” You said, feeling a chill run down your spine.
“And we both know why that is.”
“Yeah, but if...” You tried to start talking, but she quickly cut you off.
“Please don't start.” She abruptly put the cup she was holding in one hand down on the table and turned the other away from you. “We've been through this many times.”
Tick.
“But it's not fair.” You got up from your seat suddenly, feeling a couple of tears running down your cheeks and worry welling up in Emily. “It's going to be a month of this already.”
“We're not going back now. It's still dangerous for everyone.” She stood up behind you, trying to talk some sense into you. “We'll come back when it's time.”
Tock.
“And when will it be time? How much longer? You told me it would be a short time and now...” Your daily round of questions since you two had arrived there had begun once again.
“Please stop acting like a little girl.” Emily spoke up before she could think through her words.
Boom.
Oh, that was something your mother would say, not your sister. She would never judge you for being afraid and sentimental.
“Am I a little girl for wanting to know when we will have our lives back?” You asked after a few seconds to process her words. “I'm sorry, I don't have your mental strength to take it. I don't have a JJ to talk to and play online games with every time I drown in here. I don't have anyone but you, and I feel like you don't even trust me.”
The words had come out of your mouth without much thought, and you realized that they might have caused some distress when you saw her expression.
“I trust you, you're my little sister.” She came up to you slowly, trying to show you that what you said wasn't true. “I've known you since you were born. There's no one I trust and care about more.”
“And where was that confidence when you needed help?” The question came out of you automatically before you went to your room.
As soon as you laid your face on the pillow, you thought about how much you needed the people who were away at that moment, especially the one who was your voice of reason. You felt a certain longing for their presence.
September 21st, 2011
Spencer was frozen in place because you weren't there.
There was no trace of your presence in the room, and his heart threatened to burst with pain. His eyes were tired of desperately searching for you, and his mouth was tired of holding back questions about your whereabouts because the answer frightened him.
“I'm really sorry, but I've wanted to tell everyone the truth for a long time.” Emily said after several unexpected hugs and reunions. It was only then that her gaze fell on him. “Reid.”
“She is...?” His voice was cut off before he could finish his sentence. The mere possibility that his mind had been playing tricks on him all this time tore him apart.
“Alive.”
In that moment, all other concerns in his life receded into the background, including the intense discomfort in his hand. His world had once again come crashing down, and the pain he was experiencing seemed to lose its meaning in the midst of it all.
His heart seemed to start beating again after seven months of complete inactivity just by hearing that word. The few tears he had left moistened his eyes, momentarily blurring his vision and preventing him from seeing how everyone around him looked at him. Just one word kept going through his mind.
Alive. Alive. Alive.
You have been alive all this time.
“Where is she?” He asked instantly, anxious. He took another quick look around the room, but you weren't there. “Why isn't she here?”
Just from the apologetic look Emily gave him before she spoke, he knew something was wrong. “I haven't heard from her in almost two months.”
The sentence lingered in the air for a few seconds before it was processed. It was difficult to imagine that you would stay away from your sister for so long. That didn't seem like you.
“Why?” Penelope was so intrigued that she couldn't help but ask the question before anyone else in the room had a chance to. “Is she okay?”
The woman was clearly uneasy under the intense scrutiny of her colleagues, who kept glancing at her as if she were a ghost. “We had a disagreement, and she left. All I know is that she's here somewhere in the city trying to protect all of you.”
As it turned out, Spencer wasn't crazy. He really did see you on the street. It really was you all this time.
“I know this is a bad time, but I was hoping you could help me find her because I really don't know...” Emily tried to speak again, her voice cracking.
At that moment, JJ gently put a hand on her shoulder and approached the group, having spent several minutes in contemplative silence. “We've located her.” She noted respectfully, giving Reid a look that conveyed guilt and regret for what was happening. “And she is here.”
All eyes were riveted to the door of the room at that moment, waiting for you to be there to resolve some doubts and heal other pains. The hearts seemed to explode with the expectation of a new confrontation, of you being part of the miracle.
Because it was a miracle that you and Emily were alive, right?
“Hello.” Your voice echoed in the room and made everything fade away.
The mere sound of your voice, after months of hearing it only through old videos and voice memos, had Spencer leaning on the table with one hand and the other on his heart, trying to keep it from falling out of his chest.
God, you were there. Really there.
It was you again. Unmistakably you.
April 10th, 2011
“Hello?”
The telephone, which had been in your possession, suddenly became detached from your grasp and hung precariously close to the ground. You were overcome with a sudden rush of emotion, your body trembled, your breathing ceased, and your eyes brimmed with tears as you heard your boyfriend's voice.
“Hello? Who is this?” You listened as Spencer repeated when you had the strength to pick up the phone again and put it to your ear. “Hello?”
It's me, I love you, I'm sorry.
That's all you had to tell him, because it was the truth, even though he might not like it and it might ruin his day to find out about your charade. He had a right to know. Especially since he was the best thing in your life and you were the worst thing, causing him so much pain. You shouldn't have to be a psychic to know that he was suffering.
All those candid conversations you had with him about the challenges of losing loved ones were truly impactful. In a way, you were now one of the people he'd lost.
“What are you doing? Who are you talking to?” Emily's voice startled you, so you quickly hung up the phone, trying not to look suspicious. But she knew you too well to deceive her. “Please tell me you didn't do what I think you did.”
You didn't say a word, and that was enough.
“Please.”
“I was just thinking about what if. I didn't do anything, I didn't call anyone.” You raised your hands in innocence and walked away from the phone calmly because you knew you had already hung up. “I'm not a fool.”
That's nonsense. You were a fool for love and always have been.
Perhaps you loved too much, or perhaps you didn't love at all and just enjoyed the feeling of being loved. Your negative thoughts were causing you to doubt the reality of your experiences with Spencer. He seemed too good to be true, and you sought reassurance in his voice to confirm that you weren't losing touch with reality. The idea of trying to explain this to your sister made you feel self-conscious and a bit foolish.
“Okay.” She said in a calm tone, even though he didn't believe a word of it. She took you by the arm gently and spoke again. “I've found a store you'll like.”
You simply nodded and followed her because you felt it was important to avoid making it all about you.
September 21st, 2011
The person you had been waiting months to see had left the room upon seeing you, as if you were some kind of plague threatening to kill him. You felt a sense of loss, as if your heart had died in that instant, while you received the deep embrace of your older sister and the occasional dismayed look from the people who used to know you.
“You should go talk to him.” Emily said, her voice conveying concern and empathy, which caught you off guard. Her hand was still on your lower back, and it felt comforting.
You were at a loss for words, so you simply nodded and left the room to find him.
It was quite remarkable how you were able to locate his troubled figure so quickly after stepping out into the hallway. It seemed as if your intuition had guided you directly to where he was. You felt a pang of guilt as you noticed Spencer standing in front of the large wall with pictures of those killed in action, looking specifically at the lower portion where your picture was next to Emily's. It seemed somewhat incongruous that you were there, given that you no longer officially worked for the FBI and your death hadn't been in the field. However, you assumed someone had pulled strings to put you next to your sister.
“Spencer.” His name came out of your mouth slowly and painfully after you had avoided saying it for seven months. Your arms wrapped around him before you had a chance to think about what you were doing. You just wanted to feel him close and be reassured that he was real. “I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.”
He remained silent and still, seemingly unaware of your presence, as you clung to his body like a life preserver in the midst of a storm.
God, you needed him so much.
Just when you thought maybe he hadn't heard you because he hadn't even flinched at your voice, he turned away from you and spoke. “I've been looking at these pictures every day for seven months now, every time I pass by or get a chance to come by. I'm trying to convince myself that you were dead, really dead, and that I'm not freaking out already.” His tone was as cold and sharp as a knife edge. “And now you're here.”
As soon as you became aware of the absence of its presence, you felt a bit disoriented. You took a few seconds to regain your composure before you looked at your picture with a hint of disappointment and considered removing it from the wall, but you realized it was firmly attached and it might not be the most constructive approach. Removing it wouldn't address the underlying issue.
“I'm sorry, it wasn't my...just try to understand me.” You could only stammer at that moment, unable to excuse yourself.
“I can't do it. I understand Emily's motives a little better. She wanted to protect you, us, and herself. But you...” He paused, as if the words weighed so heavily that he needed to take a breath before saying them. “You knew when I was afraid of going really crazy, and yet you let me think I was losing my mind.”
His words had a profound impact, evoking a growing sense of emotional distress. You felt a deep sense of regret for causing pain to someone who had done nothing to deserve it.
“I know I hurt you, but I didn't mean to. I swear.” You spoke to him with a trembling voice, trying to control your need to walk up to him and take his hand in the same loving way as before. “I know you suffered, I did too, and I thought of you every day I was gone.”
He let out a short, frustrated sound and paced the room a few times before meeting your eyes again. You didn't need to take into account what the FBI had taught you about human behavior, because he went way beyond that and none of it was likely to help you now. You had gotten to know Spencer very well and had never seen him as upset as he was now. No manual could help you know what to do.
“I bet you thought about me and felt bad, right? But you know what the difference between us is?” His tone was harsh, but his gaze seemed so fragile it hurt you. “You woke up every day to an empty bed, and I woke up next to a grave. It could never be the same.”
Your lips were sealed because you knew he was absolutely right and nothing you could say would change that.
“Please, Spencer, wait.” You followed him down the hallway before he could leave and saw him stop to look at you doubtfully. You never before imagined that the one who used to watch you with such expectation and love was going to watch you as if you were a phony. “I love you.”
He frowned and lifted his shoulders. “It's too late for that.”
It is possible that it was.
Tag List ♥︎ : @rosieinvienna @florencespirit @jiuseoks @rinsie @guiltyyassin
If you'd like to be included in the tag list, please leave a comment here or in one of the other parts of the series, and I'll add you. It's the same if you want to be removed, just let me know.
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jadeylovesmarvelxo · 8 hours
Text
The fight was ugly. The first fight that you and Eddie had turned from a quiet disagreement to a full blown yelling match.
Truthfully you couldn't remember what the fight was actually about. Something silly, something miniscule that turned into a big thing.
A big argument with some horrible things said; you still couldn't get Eddie's words out of your head.
"Why would this mean anything? It's just sex isn't it?" Eddie snapped and your heart broke into a million tiny pieces. Just sex. Right. Of course that's what you two were.
Truthfully you were a mess and you should have just gone straight back home after storming out of the trailer.
Eddie has tried to go after you but you were faster and ran before he could catch up with you.
Instead you bumped into a few of your friends and hitched a ride to some party that one of Jason Carver's friends were throwing. Robin noticed your tear streaked cheeks and gave your hand a reassuring squeeze.
She was the only one of your friends who knew about Eddie; maybe Steve as well as him and Robin were as thick as thieves. Like platonic soulmates or something.
You and Eddie got together two months ago, passing off the hook ups as just mind-blowing sex and that worked at first. That's until you begun to get to know Eddie better and the two of you spent more time together.
Eddie was easy to fall in love with. His reputation portrayed him as mean and scary, satan obsessed and someone people should stay away from.
He was none of those things, he was kind and fiercely loyal to his friends and uncle, he was passionate and badass and really it was no surprise that you fell in love with him.
At least now you know that he doesn't feel the same way, at least you found out now before it was too late and you were even more in love with him than you are now.
Maybe you could just hang with your friends and forget the words that had broken your heart tonight.
At least you hoped that was possible.
❤️
Fuck, you really should have went home. Your head was pounding, the two beers you had made you even more anxious and upset. To make matters worse Tyler Harvey wouldn't leave you alone, he had zeroed in on you from the second you had walked through the door.
As much as you tried to avoid him, he followed you around and it was beginning to give you the creeps.
He manages to corner you when you're trying to get up to the bathroom with Robin. He stinks of beer, smoke and sweat and it turns your stomach a little bit.
Leather, smoke and the hints of woods and musk were your favourite scents in the world right now and that had to do with the man you were trying not to think about.
You cringe away from Tyler but he's so drunk that he doesn't seem to notice, he moves closer to you and you instinctively step back.
"Can you move please? Robin and I need to go upstairs" you ask him but he doesn't appear to be listening.
"Aww why don't you come upstairs with me? I'll take care of you" Tyler smirks but you don't like the look in his eyes and immediately step away from him. Yeah...no thanks. Robin is at your side at once and glares at Tyler.
"Take the hint asshole. She's not interested" Robin gently guides you away but Tyler grabs your arm at the same time and you stumble, landing hard on the floor. It knocks the wind out of you and your body throbs from the contact with the floor.
Tyler scrapers from the scene without even checking to see if you're alright. Robin is cursing out Tyler and helps you up. You're sore, annoyed and just want to go home.
Steve appears out of nowhere and Robin mentions that she called Steve when you mentioned you were getting a migraine. Relief fills you, at least you could go to Steve's for a little while and try and salvage some of the night with him and Robin.
There's a tiny voice inside of you that is aching for Eddie and it's growing stronger. You dismiss the idea, you're sure that Eddie was glad to be rid of you. That thought caused a new throbbing ache in your chest and you hurried outside with Steve and Robin determined not to think about Eddie and his big brown eyes.
❤️
As soon as you're at Steve's he puts in a movie and you settle up on the couch with Robin while Steve makes snacks. Being here is soothing and you rest your head on Robin's
Steve's landline ringing breaks you out of your sleep, Steve hurries to answer it and your heart skips a beat when you realise it's Eddie.
"Yeah, yeah dude she's with me and Robin. Some shit went down at a party we were at... Oh that asshole friend of Jason was being a prick. Yeah Tyler is it? Woah calm down man, she's fine. She's just tired"
You get up which is a little tricky as the sudden movement makes your migraine feel ten times worse but you really want to speak to Eddie.
Steve passes the phone over to you and you smile a tiny bit as Eddie is still ranting about what he wants to do to Tyler.
"Eddie, I'm okay" you murmur and he stops his rant and breathes a sigh of relief.
"Sweetheart. Fuck, I've been so worried princess. I went to your house, then Family Video. I even dropped around Wheeler's house which was a shock for Mama Wheeler to see if you were there. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I was a butthead"
The ache in your chest subsides a little bit and you relax. "I'm sorry too. I'm really sorry" tears spill down your cheeks and it's cathartic to finally let them out.
"I'm going to come and pick you up Kay? I'm not going to relax until I see that you're okay. I'll see you in about ten minutes okay?"
The tension you're feeling begins to disappear and you wait for Eddie to arrive, thanking Robin and Steve for being so amazing tonight.
True to his word Eddie arrives as quickly as he says he would and gives Steve and Robin a quick nod in greeting, he immediately pulls you close to him.
His lips press against hair and he briefly talks to Steve before guiding you out the door and into his van.
You're so exhausted from the nights escapades that you're asleep instantly.
❤️
When you wake up you're in Eddie's bed, Eddie is laying beside you and reading Lord of the Rings - The Two Towers. When he realises you're awake he presses his lips to your forehead and he tucks the covers around you, cuddles up at your side and holds you close.
"I'm sorry I was such a dickhead. You have no idea how much you mean to me, you mean everything to me and I was so scared to tell you. So I lashed out and said stupid shit. Things I didn't mean"
There's something unspoken hanging in the air, a familiar tension that's been playing the two of you for a little while now.
"I thought that you were sick of me and that's why you said those things" you confess and play with a start thread on his plaid shirt.
Eddie's jaw drops and he's silent for a moment, "Princess how could you even think that? You're...shit, I've never felt this way about anyone and it's terrifying trying to think of the right words, wondering if you feel the same way" he pauses as he lets the words sink in.
He's blushing, restless and anxious as his eyes meet yours; You sit up and cup Eddie's cheek with your hand.
"How do you feel about me Eddie?" It feels pretty certain now but you'd like to make sure. You'd like to hear him say it.
"I'm in love with you princess. How can you not see that? I guess I was just scared to tell you because I'm not exactly the perfect guy am I?" He scoffs as he says this and you scowl at the way his eyes turn sad.
"I don't care about that Eddie. Who wants perfect? I don't. I think you're amazing and handsome, you're sweet and kind, a gentleman. You make my heart skip a beat when you look at me and I feel at ease and content when I'm with you" his fingers entwined with yours and he sighs.
"You know so many people think I'm a freak, normally I don't give a fuck but I do care what others think about you" you soften and press gentle kisses over his cheek, the action causes him to smile shyly and his tense body relaxes.
"Eddie I don't give a shit what anyone says or thinks. Are you going to give us up just because of some idiots who don't matter? The only people that matter in this relationship are you and me. I love you Eddie, I'm so in love with you"
He looks up at you stunned and then he kisses you fiercely, "No I'm not giving us up. I love you sweetheart so much. You're my girl and I'm not letting you go because of some dumb assholes opinion"
The two of you spend the rest of the night making up and when you're tucked up in Eddie's arms as he falls asleep, you're left with the gentle feeling of this being where you're meant to be.
This trailer, Eddie's room, his arms around you as his soft snores fill the air. The sound of the wind blowing against the windows as you're lulled to sleep.
This felt like home.
💕
I get to love you
It's the best thing that I'll ever do
I get to love you
It's a promise I'm making to you
Whatever may come, your heart I will choose
Forever I'm yours, forever I do
I get to love you, I get to love you.
I Get To Love You- Ruelle
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dragon-kazansky · 1 day
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The song in our hearts
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Lestat De Lioncourt x Female Reader
A musician with a heart that sings and an admirer who wishes to see his songbird thrive. Two beings in different worlds get caught up in each other when someone threatens to steal his songbird's spotlight. Loving Lestat isn't simple, and your life will never be the same again. What is eternity without chaos?
{Masterlist}
{Previous Chapter} - {Next Chapter}
Chapter Seven - Eleanor
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You aren't seen by Amelie all week. The first glimpse she gets of you is at the theater that following Friday. You hadn't told her you had spent almost every night in Lestat's home. That would definitely give her ideas, and you didn't need that right now.
She follows you into your dressing room. You take a seat at your table and look at your reflection. You're looking a little paler than before.
“Are you alright?” Amelie asks softly. She could tell she was worried about you. “I went to your house a couple times, you weren't there.”
You turn and look at her. “I've been… busy.”
Amelie comes closer and takes your hand in hers. “Busy?”
“I've just got a lot going on.”
She presses her hand to your forehead. “You look a little off, but you don't seem to have a temperature. Do you need anything? Water? Food? To rest a little?”
You shake your head. “No. I'm okay.”
“If you're sure…” Amelie doesn't look convinced. She steps away and takes her leave.
You slump agaiant your dressing table and sigh, fingers digging into your hair. All week you have been sneaking off to Lestat's to simply be with him. To let him taste you. To let him hold you.
God, the way his arms felt around you was a dream. You wanted nothing more than that in life. Well, there was perhaps more you could want to do with him. He certainly knew as much.
‘Are you alright, Chéri?’ 
His voice is in your head. He seems to know every thought and feeling you have. You find you don't mind quite as much. 
‘You're thinking a lot. Don't worry, mon amour.’
My love. That was the first time he had called you that.
A knock at your door makes you jump and turn around to see who it was. “Come in.”
The door opens and Jack enters. You offer him a smile and he smiles in return. “Amelie looked worried. Are you okay?” He asks.
“I assure you, I am well.”
‘More than well.’
You ignore Lestat in your mind.
“No one has seen or heard anything from you all week.”
‘I have certainly heard you.’
“No. I'm sorry. I've been busy. I'm still here though.” You smile again.
“Good. You're my best performer. You and that piano are my stars.”
‘The brightest star I have ever seen.’
You smile, but who you're smiling from is the question. You know who.
“I'll let you get ready.” Jack leaves you alone to prepare. 
You look at yourself in the mirror and stare hard at your reflection. You smile at yourself.
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The magician on stage takes a bow, and people applaud. Lestat watches with disinterest. He doesn't care for anyone else in this show. He wants to see his shining star. His darling. His music maker.
The stage clears and the lights turn to the manager, Jack. He babbles for a little while and then addresses the crowd with open arms. Lestat leans forward in his seat, a proud grin on his lips.
Your name is announced.
The curtain open to reveal your piano in place and as Jack exists the stage, you come on. Lestat can't teat his eyes away from you. You're wearing a gorgeous gown and around your neck is that ruby red necklace he gave you months ago.
Your eyes find his own and he winks at you from his box. You're gorgeous.
You take a bow and sit down at your piano. A few moments of silence fill the room before you fill the air with your beautiful music. You're playing his song again. Lestat smiles. If this was a declaration, he was listening.
Everyone in the room was hanging on to every note. You had them completely wrapped up in your magic. You were the siren and they were the sailors.
You played for the next half hour. You enchanted every soul in the room.
Lestat had fallen even more for you.
When your time was done you took a bow and left the stage. Lestat, as usual, leaves his box. He's waiting for you at your dressing room before anyone else. You smile as he reaches out and caresses your cheek gently with his fingers. His touch is ghostly, so light you could barely feel it.
As Lestat leans in, almost as if to kiss you, you're both interrupted by a voice. You both turn to see a young woman, mid twenties at least, looking at you.
“Excuse me, I don't suppose you know where Noah is? I didn't see him in the show tonight and I wanted to speak to him.”
You feel yourself go stiff. Lestat grabs your arm gently and smiles at the woman. “Who is asking?”
“My name is Eleanor. I'm Noah's sister. I wrote to him to tell him I was coming to see him perform, but I didn't get a response, at least not one that arrived in time.” She shuffles on the spot slightly. “I was disappointed to see he was not on stage tonight. Don't suppose you know where he's staying?”
You turn your eyes to Lestat for help. What were you supposed to say? ‘Oh gosh, we're so sorry, you see, your brother was being an ass and Lestat decided to feed on him until he was dead.’
Yeah, that would go down well.
“Did you not hear? He left,” Lestat tells her.
The woman visibly deflates. “He did? No, I hadn't heard.”
Lestat keeps his hand on your arm to keep you calm. “Perhaps his letter had yet to reach you.”
“Possibly,” she sighs.
Lestat feels you grabbing at the sleeve and puts on a polite expression for Eleanor. “If you don't mind, we are just leaving.”
She looks between you both and steps back, getting the message. “Of course. Forgive me. I better contact home and see if Noah got through. Thank you kindly, both of you.”
Lestat takes your hand and guides you past the young woman. You're holding onto him tight. He can feel your panic just from the touch of your hand.
Once you're out of the theater you drag him into the alley nearby. 
“Shit, Shit, Shit!” You hiss out. “What are we gonna do?”
“Nothing,” he replies nonchalantly. 
“Nothing?” You stare at him in disbelief. “You killed her brother and she's looking for him!”
Lestat shrugs. “So? She'll never find him. I disposed of the body.”
“Oh my God!”
“He can't help you.”
You glare at the vampire. “This isn't funny! I'm the last person Noah went to see. No one knows you were involved!”
“Calm, Chéri. All will be well. No harm shall come to you.” He holds your face in his cold hands.
“Lestat…”
“Shh. If you keep on worrying you'll get wrinkles.” He taps your nose with his finger. “Do you want that?”
“Stop messing around.” You wave his hands away from your face. “Someone has to take things seriously around here.”
“Why? Nothing to worry about. You'll see.”
You almost hate how unbuttered he is by this, but at the same time, how many times has he done this before? Lestat was a clever man. He surely chose his victims carefully. If people kept on disappearing from the same place, flags would be raised. 
“I trust you,” you say softly.
Lestat grins. “That's what I like to hear. Now, back to mine for a nightcap?”
You roll your eyes and go with him.
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When you get back to his house, Lestat can tell you're still freaking out over Eleanor's presence in town. You're all figgity in your seat. Lestat sighs and holds out the glass of wine in front of your face. When you don't take it from him he places it on the table beside you.
“I can make you forget,” he offers.
“Forget?”
“About Eleanor and her questions.”
“That might make things worse,” you sigh. You didn't want to forget that the family of a dead man was out there searching for him.
“Just for tonight.” Lestat leans over, his lips brushing along your ear. You feel a shiver run down your spine. 
He closes the distance between you both and wraps his arms around you so smoothly. You fall into his embrace with ease. Whatever line there was between you before had been crossed, and you knew there was no going back. Lestat kisses along your jaw, your breathing came out in small little pants. He had you right where he wanted you.
“Lestat,” he name falls from your lips with ease.
“Shh.” He whispers in your ear. “Tonight you are mine and I am yours.”
His lips press against your own with desire. Long awaited desire. From this single kiss you knew he had been waiting a long time for this. Lestat had had his eyes on you for a while now. It was only a matter of time before he got what he wanted. Lestat could be patient when he wanted to be.
He pulls you into his lap and brings your bodies closer together. It's like a magnetic force bringing you together. You follow after his lips, your hands grab onto him wherever they can. Lestat lets you chase after every part of him that you want.
Your fingers dig into his hair as he pulls you to sit up in his lap. He lifts you up enough so he can lay you down and climb on top of you. His lips leave yours to trail back down your jaw and then your neck. Your back arches as he goes lower, down to your collarbone. His hands stay firm on your hips.
You're about to forget your own damn name, that's for sure.
His large hands go wandering under your clothes. You've never found yourself in this position before. Lestat had you feeling all kinds of ways.
You gasp as he sucks on the spot he bit you from last time you were here. The skin there was sensitive and had you shaking under him.
“Ma petite beauté.”
He speaks in a low voice. He's using every ounce of his charms to keep you with him. It's working.
His fingers pluck at your clothes. You don't even move to stop him. He smirks against your skin.  He's about to undo the buttons but there's firm knocking at the door.
Lestat lifts his head. You look up at him. “Don't answer it.”
“Chéri, I do not get guests.” He looks at you.
You hear the knock again and Lestat rises from the couch. He fixes his hair and stalks slowly toward the door. You sit up and fix your clothes, missing the touch of his lips on your skin.
Lestat opens the doors. You watch from your spot on the sofa. He doesn't say anything as she steps back and lets the person inside.
Amelie.
You stand up quickly and hurry over to her. “What are you doing here?”
“I knew you would be here.” She looks you up and down. “I didn't know where else to go.”
You place your hands on her shoulders and look at her. Lestat watches from the door. He remains quiet as you talk to her.
“It's about Noah… the police came to the theater. His sister called them after finding his apartment. He's gone missing.”
You stare at her. Lestat can see the panic in your eyes. Eleanor was causing him problems. He is normally a little more clever when it comes to his victims.
“What… what's happening?” You ask.
“They're saying kidnap, but… they're also gonna look for a body… It was awful. They were all over the theater lookin’ for clues.”
You glance at Lestat who holds your gaze with a sharp look. You turn back to Amelie. “Let me walk ya home.”
Amelie nods and follows you out. Lestat doesn't even get to kiss you goodbye.
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@awanderingghost @theprettiesthead @cosmixstar @theblueslytherin @katherine2098 @sawendel @floofdeloop @sitkafay @bigbaddie45 @bluscryn
@secretisme4 @darkqueen1995 @bridkesby @caribbeangal @sarcasticandfangirl @missjadesfics @kaybart19
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privategurlsblog · 2 days
Text
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Brat
Not intended for minors. 18+ only!
Warnings: fingering. piv. standards really!
PLOT: a cute follow up to this. can also be read as a standalone 🖤
🪩🖤🪩🖤🪩🖤🪩🖤🪩🖤🪩🖤🪩🖤🪩🖤🪩🖤
You and Alex had been together for six months now. You saw it as a celebration, he didn't even realise.
You crossed your arms and stared up at the stage he was on, guitar at hand, half drunken smile as he looked out towards the few stragglers in attendance tonight. Of course his eyes lingered on you, but you didn't grant him the same satisfaction. You looked away the second his met you.
Instead you kept your eyes driven on the bartender. You knew him from a few years above, one of your friend's brothers. You weren't flirting, of course you weren't. He would never touch you. But that wasn't relevant, you were pleased that to Alex, it might look that way nonetheless.
You wanted him to suffer. Wanted him to realise that you were special. You were a treat in his life. The fact you've even granted him the right to swan around town hand in hand with you is a miracle in itself, even if college is over and no one really cares anymore. But lately it's been all about his band, their stupid gigs and his stupid friends and you're fed up. Since when were you just on the sidelines? Battling with a damned guitar for his attention?
After the show ended, you expected Alex to rush to your side but he didn't. In fact, he sidled up at the end of the bar with a few people hovering around him and he sunk enough pints that even you got fed up of pretending and left instead.
He was meant to come around yours tomorrow anyway, you loved Saturday mornings together basking in the warmth of the sun. Every day was like that for you now but Alex worked, yet he always reserved those mornings for you. The thought of it made you smile, even through your anger.
The next day he turned up to your house with a bunch of flowers and a sorrowful smile, going on about how he'd gotten pissed last night and he was sorry he was late. All you heard was 'blah blah blah' and bullshit excuses. He managed to nuzzle his way into your neck, heart and eventually, your bed, but your anger didn't dissipate.
Over the following few weeks, it increased by a tenfold. The band had managed some studio space, somewhere arse end of Sheffield you'd learnt not from Alex, but from Matthew when you bumped into him at the shop.
"Isn't it great? I reckon we've got a good chance at getting some songs out you know," Matthew said to you as you both browsed the aisles. He went to the beer section and you hovered behind him with a can of coke and a scowl.
"Yeah it's great," you mumbled, half arsed. You picked up a bottle of wine, planning on necking it back later with Matthew's equally as neglected girlfriend while you bitched about them all night long.
As you both checked out, you thought of ways you could get to Alex. How you could hurt him and make him feel as hard done by as you had these past few months. An idea came to your mind and you smiled to yourself, ignoring the weird look you were receiving from the cashier when your pout turned into a malicious grin.
"Oh yeah," you called after Matt and he slowed his steps, glancing back at you curiously, "tell Alex we're finished."
You bounced away with a pep in your step. The consequences of your actions seemed far removed when compared to the thrill you got at Alex panicking. Matt gawped after you, watching you practically skip down the street before rushing to his neighbours house to inform him of your words.
That night Alex rang you and you hit ignore. You were having far too much fun knocking back wine with your friends, dancing on the settees like little girls, screaming the house down to old songs. The scene distracted you from the fact that it was fleeting. Already your heart ached for the man you loved, but you were yet to recognise that yearning.
Eventually, after too much wine, too many cigarettes and enough singing to make your voice hoarse - you were drunk enough to answer one of his many calls.
"What Alex?" you slurred down the phone, ignoring the giggles of the equally juvenile girls beside you. You didn't realise they were just eager for the drama opposed to advising you the right thing. Perhaps they should've told you that you were acting like a brat - but your doubts about their intentions were drowned out from the alcohol.
"Where are you?" he answered, his voice proving his annoyance. A tone you were used to these days, a hearty reminder that you're nothing more than a nuisance to him, something that stood between him and his success.
"Lucy's. Drinking."
He sighed at your bluntness, "I'll pick you up."
You didn't argue.
The next half hour went by in a blur of giggles and slurs, eventually you heard the knock on the door and your friend informed you that Alex was here. In your drunken state, your anger had temporality evaporated and you were all over him, slinging your arms around his neck and kissing his cheeks, desperate for his attention.
You don't remember much of what was said but you do remember that he kept pushing you off with a gruff tone. But that could all wait until the morning, at least you're snuggled up by his side now, where you've wanted to be all along.
The next morning you wake up with a groan, your eyes battling with the beaming sun intent on torturing you. Your arm comes to rest on your forehead and you wince as you try to sit up only to find your body heavy and hot underneath a blue plaid duvet - Alex's, to be precise.
You look around for him, finding him sat on his desk chair though facing the bed. One leg propped on the bed frame, leant back in the chair with a notepad on his knee with his familiar messy scribbles all over and undetectable from where you were. His long hair was messy around his head, his eyes still heavy lidded with sleepiness and he was shirtless, his skinny figure taut and gleaming in the sunlight. Every muscle in your body ached and yet something sweet rattled through you at the sight of him, momentarily curing you as you offered a smile.
"What am I doing here?" you mumbled with a cracked voice, your throat still burning from the incessant, girlish screams of the night prior. You shifted yourself up, leant on your knees and cupped your throat like that would ease the pain.
Alex looked at you with a placid expression, his eyes giving absolutely nothing away. Immediately you felt the edge of his annoyance, despite his outward appearance, the vibes he was emitting gave you a clear indication of where this would go. Your smile fell.
"Yeah," he drawled, elongating his word, the anger seeping through, "what are you doing here? Thought we were broken up."
You winced. Now that he was here, his undivided attention set on you, your grand plan seemed a little, well....fucking stupid.
"You didn't have to bring me back here," your youth clouded your good intentions. Everything inside of your heart urged you to apologise, but your mind was telling you to remain stubborn, to make him suffer.
You pouted as you climbed out of the covers, finding yourself still in the clothes from the night prior. The only part missing of your outfit being the ridiculous heels you'd shoved your poor feet into. They stung as they hit the scratchy carpet of his bedroom, you refrained from showing how weak you were as you stood.
"Your mum would kill you if you came home plastered like you were," he scoffs, settling his notepad on his desk, only a mere few inches away from the bed.
"Didn't realise you gave a fuck," you sneered in return, searching the floor for your shoes. You found them in the corner, bending over to retrieve them and you smirked to yourself when you felt the heat of his gaze on your arse, still shoved into a tiny leather skirt.
"What's going on with you? You've been so fucking agitated recently," Alex kept his voice low, well aware of his parents only a few doors down. After the mishap of his mother walking in on you two, you both held caution whenever locked away in here.
"Yeah because you don't pay any bloody attention to me," you hissed.
"Are you surprised?" he raises his eyebrows, standing up as you start to claw your hair back into a ponytail. You probably looked horrendous. At least he'd seen you like this before.
"Why would I give you the time of day when you're just moody all the time? Can't get a bloody worthy conversation out of you," he rolled his eyes and you pouted even further.
"Well luckily it won't be your problem anymore," you held your head high despite the fear soaring around your body that he might just agree. Might just be fed up with your antics.
"Don't be ridiculous Y/N. We're not breaking up."
You stalled, your hair falling back onto your shoulders. The hair-tie had snapped at that exact moment, as if it was emphasising his words, making them a bigger deal than they were.
"Says who?"
"Says me," he grabbed your hand, even through his anger, he needed to feel you under his fingertips. Obsessed with your body he was, and his eager hands ran down the sides of it now, even with the frown still on his brow.
"Don't I get a say?"
"Not when you're being a brat," his sharp tongue whips your skin but you don't mind. You revel in the sound of him caring, reacting, like you've been wishing for all these weeks.
You swing your arms around his neck, too aware of the wine lingering on your breath to kiss him even if his wide eyes keep flickering to your lips nonetheless.
"But you love me."
He rolls his eyes, his grip on you tightening. Your body is pressed to his and you're still in that slutty outfit, it's natural for him to respond as he is, with his cock stiffening against your thigh and his hands unable to help but grope you.
"You know that. Do you always have to find ways to prove it?" his voice is now softer, tainted with the insecurity of your relationship failing. He rarely takes you seriously with all your moods giving him whiplash. Today, though, your reassurance matters to him.
"You forgot our six month anniversary," your voice contained a trace of disappointment that made his skin crawl. He hated letting you down, "and you would rather grind against a guitar all day than me."
Alex can't help but laugh, his face lighting up. The insides of you turn to mush and you near melt in his arms at the sound of his melody of happiness.
"People don't celebrate six months anniversaries," he counters, leaning in to kiss you but you pull back, nearly toppling over if it wasn't for the strength of his fingertips pressing into your waist, "and I love grinding on you. Far more than anything else."
You raise your eyebrows, the pout on your lips still prominent. You can feel Alex against your thigh, you can see the heat simmering beneath his gaze and you wonder briefly if this is all just to bed you.
"I'm not shagging you," you blurt out, "until you prove that you love me for more than that."
Alex refrains a whine, he knows you have a hard time portraying your feelings. He doesn't want to give you more the reason to run, when you've already tried to, albeit for the wrong reasons but still. One day you actually might and he just can't have that.
"Okay."
"Okay?" you scoff, suddenly releasing him. The lack of weight against him makes him stumble back, a little disorientated as he grips the edge of the desk and gets sent to hell from your gaze, "so you don't even wanna fuck me?"
His heart raced with annoyance, his body tensed and his fingers twitched to hold his temple like he was a forty year old divorcee with a difficult ex wife. It felt like that sometimes.
"I'm rock hard," he gestured to his crotch, the outline of it perfectly visible through those infamous plaid PJ bottoms, "of course I wanna fuck you."
"Okay," you grinned, eyes like saucers at the sight of his arousal, "well I need a shower. A toothbrush. And I'm hungry. And I'm gagging for a drink. A tea. You know the sugar helps my hangovers."
You waffled on and Alex's smile grew with every word.
"Go home. Shower. Brush your teeth. I'll take you out for breakfast."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah babe," he captured you once more, twirling a strand of your hair around his finger, looking at it intently, "all yours. All day. I promise."
You believed him.
Maybe you shouldn't have. After you have breakfast and decide to go on a cute forest walk with a joint and dreams of getting dirty in more ways than one - Alex's phone incessantly buzzes.
You glance to it halfway through a story about the night prior. You're bitching, he's listening. He always does even if sometimes you notice him looking vacant, you never take it personally, that's just how Alex is.
"Who is it?" you wonder when he ends the call again.
"Just Matt," he shrugs it off, but your curious eyes don't stray from him and grow more annoyed the more he avoids them, and so eventually he sighs and lays back into the green.
"I can't help it love," he groans, "the boys are really serious about this band thing."
"I know that but you've been practicing every day Al," the hurt is evident in your tone and you hate how beared your vulnerability is, but you know it's the only way he'll listen to you. He brushes off your brattiness but he never disregards your feelings, at least not since the beginning.
"Yeah, we need to," he says, leaving you unsatisfied.
"Well maybe I was right then," you huff and stand and Alex follows you like a lost puppy, "maybe we should break up."
"I can divide the time," he promises, pulling you back towards him. You're always trying to run and he always catches you and you love him for it. You dread the day he doesn't chase you, little faith in the hope it'll never come.
Alex takes you back to his, you always end up boxed in his little room. His parents had smiled at the sight of you, enamoured by the sight of their son in love.
"You know you could always come and watch," Alex traces the curve of your nose, your features fascinating to him. Your lips are swollen and your cheeks are red, the lingering effects of having him between your thighs earlier, you look beautiful and he looks in awe of it.
"But I'll put you off," you tease, "how could you possibly focus on anything when I'm there?"
"It'll be hard," he indulges you, kissing the tip of your nose, "but I'll manage. I want you there."
The next day you find yourself sat in Jamie's garage, your legs tucked under you and a can of coke at hand as you watch them fiddle with their instruments. You'd coaxed Matt's girlfriend along so you weren't the only one here, and the boys seemed eager to please the both of you.
While they played, you kept your eyes driven to Alex's fingers. You don't know what was coming over you, whether it was because you knew what they could do, or he just moved them so perfectly over the strings that it took your mind to places it shouldn't. Either way your cheeks were heating and you were beginning to squirm.
When Alex caught your eye, he knew exactly what was going through your mind. He sang with a slight smirk, only seconds prior he wouldn't even dare look up and now he was mocking you, inspired by your obvious discomfort.
"What did you think?" Matt grinned at you both, unaware of how uncomfortable you were as you squeezed your thighs together and tried to pry your eyes away from Alex.
Who wasn't making it easy, choosing that moment to take his hoodie off, revealing a slither of his ivory skin as it lifted his shirt slightly. The conversation fizzled out in your ears like you were dunked in a pool of lust.
You crashed into the car twenty minutes later. It had been torturous, a complete blur to your wound tight like a spring body.
Alex grabbed your neck, angling himself over the mechanics in the middle, not caring for how the clutch was digging into his ribs and equally you didn't care that his nails dug into your neck as he held onto you so tightly.
His lips slid against yours with a fervour you couldn't match, you moaned into his mouth and ran your hands through his hair. His grip around your neck made you struggle to breathe but you didn't care for breath when he was breathing life into you with his kiss.
"You're so fucking fit," he says, biting your bottom lip soon after and you giggle, of course you do. You're smitten with him, he's obsessed with you.
"I want your fingers Al," you move your mouth past his cheek and next to his ear, your tongue swiping around it in a languid lick that makes him shiver.
His hand finds its place between your thighs, finding them sticky on the insides. Your panties are damp and make his breath hitch against your mouth as he presses his fingers onto you.
You gasp and he swallows it, practically laid on the mechanics now. He fumbles with the lace, pulling it to the side and licks inside your mouth as his fingers plunge into you. Your hips lift as a strangled moan leaves your throat, the heel of his hand presses against your clit, pushing you back down into the seat.
His fingers are tired from the guitar but he finds the strength to fuck you with them nonetheless, stroking the spongy spot that makes you see stars. Your hand lifts to hold the handle above your head, your neck elongating as you whine and attempt to thrash only for him to ground you again, rubbing your sensitive area.
You fall apart in a matter of minutes, your stickiness running down his hand as he halts it inside of you.
"You make better sounds when I play you than my guitar ever could," he retracts his hand with a playful grin and you giggle in turn, relaxing into the seat with all your limbs feeling like jelly.
A rap on the window pulled you from your state. You looked around with wide eyes, catching sight of Jamie with a teasing grin and eyes full of amusement.
"Get a room next time you horny bastards!" he shouts through the glass.
Alex rolls his eyes and puts the car in gear, giving him the finger as he drives away. Jamie's cackles can be heard down the street but the two of you weren't that fussed, just smiling to yourselves at how nothing had changed.
After the point where you'd been to see them, Alex's attitude towards you changed. He started to grow eager for you to be around again, constantly wanting to know your opinions on songs, asking you how certain riffs sound. You have no idea about the processes of a record but you listened to him as he waffled on.
But you just kept getting distracted. His eyes were wild, full of passion and his lips move fast in broken sentences where his thoughts were jumbled, coming out almost nonsensical. You found it so endearing and his lips even more so and you couldn't help but cut him off with a kiss.
You leant over his lap and the second he felt your lips on his, he hummed gratefully into your mouth. He didn't care for his lost words, not when your wicked tongue twined around his.
He pulled you into his lap swiftly, shuffling until his back hit the wall and you could sit on him properly, your knees pressed into the carpet at the sides of his body.
You loved how he responded to you, how hard he would get in a matter of minutes of you kissing. Before him you'd had a few boys and at their ages they hadn't exactly been hard to woo, and yet still you'd never managed to affect someone like you did Al.
You were attuned to him, knew just where to touch him. Like when you would kiss him and nibble his lower lip as he pulled away. Or when you would scratch your nails down his neck when he was fucking you, always leaving red marks that he'd have to wait for hours to fade. Or when you'd do what you're doing now, thrusting yourself so hard against him that he could feel your boobs squished between you.
He pleaded you with his eyes as he tugged the bottom of your shirt - his shirt actually - tossing it to the side. You'd stayed over the night prior and slept with no bra, and now your nipples were stiffening from the sudden change in temperature.
His eyes glazed over and his mouth went slack as he drank in the sight of you, in all your glory, with your little pout and your eager hips.
"Fuck," he muttered, "need to feel your cunt."
He's always blunt in his approach, never dressing it up romantically. His words on paper hardly matched what would leave his mouth but you didn't mind because his eyes always told you what you needed to know. Now they were telling you they were desperate for you and who were you to deny them what they wanted?
Alex shuffled slightly to edge his trackies down, his arse scratched against the carpet and it stung but he was too eager to care. Your panties were irrelevant, he merely pushed them aside until your pussy was on show and he salivated at the sight of you.
"Fuck," he repeated, his fingers teasing your swollen clit enough to have you gushing. He could see the stickiness of your arousal leaking onto his bottoms and he smirked, "always ready for me."
You huffed a laugh, your cheeks glowing as you darted a hand out to wrap around his length. It twitched in your hand, hot and heavy, standing upright like it was ready to comply to a sergeants command.
You sunk onto him with a gasp and his hand shot out to cover your mouth. He filled you all the way up, the tip prodding something that hurt deep inside but the pleasure outweighed the pain.
Your knees started to burn against the carpet as you started a steady rhythm, his quiet grunts making you work harder, faster, anything to hear more of those pretty sounds.
His eyes watched you bounce on him, how he would come out covered in your slick, how you would take him all over again, stretching to accommodate him. You were tight. Wet. Hot. His head rolled back against the wall and his lip bled as he attempted to bite back his noises.
You held steady on his shoulders, obsessed with where he would hit you inside, always right where he needed to. If you had nothing else, you'd always have this. Incredible, mind blowing sex. You weren't complaining.
Alex grew desperate and wrapped his arms around your waist, his knees pressing against your arse cheeks as he desperately fucked into you, his whole body moving, back crashing against the wall with each thrust.
His grunts echoed through your ear and made you shiver, you rested your mouth against the crook of his neck and gasped into his skin, tasting the sweat starting to form.
"I love you," he punctuated each word with a thrust and a grunt.
"I love you too Al," you gasped out, the end coming out an octave higher when you felt one of his hands slide between your body, pinching your sensitive skin until you coiled tight around him.
"M' gonna cum baby," he whispered into your hair, pressing kisses down to your ear, neck, sucking on the sensitive skin until your blood rose for him in pretty spots. He loved marking you up even if you hated it.
His arm came back around you as he delivered his final thrusts, his pace hasty, his groans louder - the pleasure clouded his mind and made him shake, hearing muffled and mouth ajar.
You licked into his mouth, the combined sensation of you filling his mouth and him filling your pussy becoming his unwinding.
His body went taut, his face moulded into an expression of raw pleasure that didn't fade for a while, making him look like he was carved out of marble. He was gorgeous and you whined softly when you felt his cum fill you.
He rocked his hips until the last of him had spilled and then his head came to rest against yours, his eyes big and round as you looked down at him, spidery lashes casting shadows over the lids of your eyes.
"I really do," his voice was gruff, you gazed at him half a world away in confusion, "love you."
"I know Al," you promised, a chaste kiss to his lips before you sat up. His hand followed your movements, he didn't want you to leave him cold and soft just yet, he liked to feel the warmth for a while longer, it was intimate, like a hug of reassurance.
"I don't want you to leave me."
"I won't."
Your mission had been accomplished. Perhaps a few weeks after you'd intended but you had him back where you wanted him nonetheless. His eyes gleamed with love, and yours mirrored. You both giggled as you leant in for a kiss and his hands softly slid up your calves. When he reached your knees, you yelped in pain and he looked at the area.
"Carpet burns," he barely suppressed the boyish smirk, "like a proper slut eh?"
You rolled your eyes, pulling yourself off of him so you could redress.
As he was pulling up his trousers and you were cleaning yourself up with the tissue box by his bed, you heard a soft knock on his bedroom door.
"Alex, honey?"
"Yeah mum," he huffed, quickly moving so he could open the door without her seeing you, still half naked, "Y/Ns just getting changed."
You raised your eyebrows, looking at the hair stuck up in every direction on his head and the flushed skin of his neck proved what you'd been up to. It's embarrassing, but inevitable. Where else are you supposed to fuck?
"Do you guys want to watch some TV? I've made you both a cuppa."
He looked around to you curiously, seeming up for it himself. The domestic scene she'd painted sounded like your dream come true. After weeks of absence, all you craved were the simple moments like those.
You nodded and he smiled.
"Sounds perfect."
She left and his attention moved back onto you. As you walked to the edge of the room in a far more presentable manner, he grabbed your waist and kissed you gently.
"I love you."
"So you keep saying," you giggled.
"And I'll say it again," he kissed your lips, "and again," your cheek, "and again," your nose, making you splutter with lovestruck laughter, hitting his chest, "and again…."
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A/N: so soft for fetus Al, I can’t even.
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peachjagiya · 3 days
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https://www.tumblr.com/peachjagiya/761835335033487360/httpswwwtumblrcompeachjagiya7617563913702932
I don’t see where I mentioned that I was a taekooker. I am not and if me saying that taekook would deny if asked if they are dating is what gave you that impression then know that I only used that example because you are a taekooker and not because I am and in hindsight maybe I should have added a disclaimer. I don’t care who you ship neither do I care what your beliefs are but I just thought I should say something about that post because to me, it isn’t right to paint Tae and Jk like that.
Someone in the replies mentioned that a taekooker would only look at the warmth of the moment and not care to debunk it. I’m sorry I didn’t know Taekookers willingly lie to themselves just because a moment feels wholesome. My bad. I assumed some people would be open to corrections. I had read somewhere that taekookers on tumblr constantly correct themselves and don’t act like the ones on twitter and instagram so maybe that’s why I got the wrong idea. My apologies.
For the anon who said something about me debunking or going against what Jk said. Jk said they send each other songs after they make them but he didn’t say they always do because we know that the first people to hear Jk’s “3D” were RM and Yoongi, not Tae, Jk said so himself so would you call Jk a liar in this case or would you also accuse him of going against his words. Even if taekook sent their songs to each other first everytime, that still wouldn’t mean that Tae knew about the process of his album would it?
Don't fret, I knew you weren't a Taekooker. Just that I thought you were for the first few lines and to be fair, on a Taekook blog, thats a reasonable expectation.
Honestly, I'm kind of fed up with the "why would they LIE?" argument.
Firstly, we're not 12. It is not as simple as "SO YOU THINK TAEHYUNG IS A LIIIIARR??" No, I think Taehyung didn't intend to butt into JK's moment. As he says later in the interview, JK is the star here today.
And secondly, I'm sorry but his surprised face during Suchwita is of no shock to me and I'm surprised it is to you. I've witnessed him absolutely poker face his way through a number of situations that ended up being different to the way they were presented so let's not start.
You are a fool if you think they don't twist the truth a bit sometimes or go with the flow of a story that isn't necessarily how it happened. I don't know how you can negotiate a controlled environment such as BTS (or k-pop) and think that there's no such thing as pretending.
Unless there's ample evidence to suggest it was exactly as it seems, you need to take your evidence from all the sources rather than zooming in on one moment as your debunk.
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hmura-hmara · 1 month
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Something about Luke being the spitting image of his father
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spoondoodles · 3 months
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I blacked out and more Logince HS AU appeared on my canvas idk what happened (also ty @oatmeal-stans-the-trash-rat for some inspiration sorry it took so long to make a post about Them <3)
#spoondoodles#sanders sides#sanders sides fanart#ts sides#tss#logan sanders#roman sanders#patton sanders#remus sanders#janus sanders#logince#I am here!!! for the platonic relationships!!!!! in this AU!!!!!!!#i have a strong character arc in my head about platonic logicality growing up together as childhood friends you have no idea asdfghj#i think they were very dependent on each other for many years so much so they'd copy each other but they're much more independent in HS#only remnant of that is that they have the same glasses + emotionally vent to each other a lot - their friends circle has grown enough#they don't live in each others' pockets anymore. roman + janus met in theatre + are gossip besties like they just talk shit together#(not completely sold on janus' design yet ngl i'm not happy with how i drew the vitilego but i'm working on it)#remus + logan are partners in chemistry in a classic teacher act of putting the 'disruptive' kid next to the 'good student' kid in hopes#that logan would stop remus acting out. predictably what happened instead is that they're friends now + remus is still as disruptive#but in a way that entertains logan so they get their work done early. now the teacher can't separate them. lol lmao.#remus knows ALL. but has been sworn to secrecy so can't say shit. janus knows roman's feelings but only suspects logan's.#patton didn't even have to be told by logan he just KNEW + is choosing not to speculate on roman's feelings b/c he's too polite.#virgil isn't here but that's b/c he also KNOWS without being told + is in an even more precarious position than remus. if they were#on better speaking terms he'd commiserate with remus. alas they are suffering separately.#anyway enough rambling from me. many thoughts head full.
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I'm back on my bullshit thinking about the Hawke siblings again and how much I love a "both twins live" AU... but y'know what I love just a little bit more? An AU where all three Hawke siblings are alive, but one of the twins still get attacked by the ogre in Lothering and is presumed dead when they actually survived.
I like to think that since the narrative in DA2 is framed as a story Varric's telling Cassandra, we can play around with the fact that he's an unreliable narrator. Varric wasn't there in Lothering. He only knows what Hawke told him. It makes for a better story if Leandra, Hawke, and the surviving twin get to huddle around the dead twin and say their goodbyes... especially if they didn't actually get to do that. I mean, a lot of us already have that train of thought when it comes to Leandra's death and Hawke getting some closure through her final words telling them how proud she is. Whose to say Varric didn't do that for the lost twin, as well?
All that to ask what if the ogre attack happened, but the group was so overwhelmed by darkspawn they had to flee further and couldn't check the twin who "died?" Flemeth still showed up, but it was too late to go back and say goodbye.... so Hawke made a deal with the Witch of the Wilds and they all pushed forward to Kirkwall.
Imagine Bethany, left behind with broken bones and bleeding in the sand, fading in and out of consciousness as the remaining darkspawn surround her. She knows how to heal, how to fight back, but she's weakened. Her staff lays out of reach. Air shakes in her lungs. She tries to call for help, but only wheezes come out. Where's her mother? Her siblings? Did the ogre get them, too?
At this point, we all know what happens to the women darkspawn take, and Bethany could've met that fate; she doesn't have the strength to fight back as they drag her away. But before they can bring her underground, she's saved by another group of survivors. Perhaps they're more soldiers fleeing Ostagar, or townsfolk who recognize her from Lothering. They do what they can to treat her wounds but she needs a healer, so they bring her with them to seek refuge in Redcliffe... except they eventually realize she's an apostate. Well, she doesn't seem dangerous, but they still contact the templars.
Bethany wakes in a warm but unfamiliar bed with skilled healers tending to her. Templars hover by the doorway. First Enchanter Irving greets her, gentle in explaining she's safe inside of Kinloch Hold and that she's going to survive. When Bethany asks about her family, he gives her a sympathetic smile and says they only found her.
Bethany, who never took to embracing her magic the way her older sibling did and always felt like it burdened her family... has lost that very family. Could they survive the ogre and darkspawn? Or did the ogre tear them apart, too? How did she survive... but not them? Did the Maker really have such a sense of humor? How else would she end up in the Circle, a place her family went to great lengths to keep her safe from?
She doesn't want to think about it. She hopes they made it to Kirkwall, but the prickle of dread that crawls up her spine knows how unlikely it is. Bethany finds comfort in speaking with the mages who rotate in to heal and bring her food. Some feel trapped by their magic just as she does, but others remind her of her older sibling in the way they embrace their magic, a gift from the Maker. The younger apprentices who aid the mages ask her questions about what lies beyond the walls. The templars mostly keep their distance, but one is friendlier than others. A man with curly blonde hair and a sympathetic view of the mages bothers to speak to her more than his fellows do.
She's still in recovery when Uldred and his blood mages attack the tower, but she survives. Bethany heals, even as she's haunted by nightmares of the ogre wrapping its tainted hand around her body to crush her, flinging her aside to lay among the limp bodies of her family... haunted by the horrors the blood mages unleashed on the tower. She aids in restoring the tower the best she can, and accepts her new home, her new life. When she's well enough, she lights a candle for each of them; her father, mother, her eldest sibling, her twin... she even lights a candle for the family mabari, and prays to the Maker to give them her love as they stand at His side.
The Blight ends. Years pass. Bethany settles into her new life, becoming a fine example for the younger apprentices she mentors. She witnesses wrong doings against her fellow mages, loses friends to their harrowings or tranquility. She accepts what she is, even if bitterly. The Chantry's teachings about magic scar more than enlighten; she sees it in some of her fellow mages, feels it in herself. Secret meetings. Whispers of escape, of freedom. More escape attempts. Harsher restrictions.
Around this time, back in Kirkwall, Knight-Captain Cullen stands where he always does in the Gallows courtyard. He notices Hawke appear with some of their companions. It hurts to think back to Kinloch Hold, but something occurs to him: he knew of another Hawke who was brought to the Circle while he served there. They only spoke once before... well, before. He wonders if there's any relation. When Hawke wanders over to speak to him, as they always do, Cullen brings it up.
Hawke pales. A beat of silence. Cullen recognizes heartbreak; he sees it unfold in their eyes and swell in their throat as they realize that all this time, their baby sister was alive.
Then the day comes where new whispers float among the mages in the Circle. A visit by a Grey Warden. Most, including Bethany, assume he's here to recruit... until Irving comes to her. He says this warden's requested, though more like insisted, he see her now. But then Irving smiles; the warden in question said his name is Warden Carver. He received an urgent letter that his sister is here, alive, and he demands to know if that's true.
Bethany nearly collapses when she sees him.
While the reunion can't last; she can't leave the Circle and he has his calling; the twins embrace, sobbing out apologies and exclamations that they thought the other was gone. Carver tells her of Kirkwall, the expedition that led him to the Grey Wardens, and their older sibling's status as Champion. With a gentleness she never knew her brother to have, he tells her what happened to their mother, and more tears flow freely. Their sibling learned about her from a templar, though Carver grumbles that the bastard could've said something sooner.
There's the Maker's humor again.
...Now flip the script: imagine Carver being left behind instead.
For as strong and passionate as he is, that ogre still picks him up and slams him to the ground. Bones crack. Black splotches flood his vision, agony exploding across his skin. His sword flies from his hand. The soulless bastard tosses Carver aside like he's nothing, and he's left to lay there. His mother's cries muffle in his ear as though he's stuck underwater, sinking slowly into the dark.
It figured, honestly... that he'd survive Ostagar while his fellow soldiers were cut down all around him, that he and his eldest sibling would flee the field when all hope was lost... that he'd make it home to get his family out of Lothering... only to die protecting his mother. And why not? He is a protector. A warrior. It's a honor to die saving those he loved... so why didn't it give him peace?
Carver eventually wakes in the night among the bodies of fallen darkspawn. Everything aches painfully hot and his thoughts reject coherency. He knows his family is gone; they're dead, or they've fled... either way, he's alone; left behind. Something's broken inside of him, but he has just enough will to pull himself up at the sound of approaching footsteps. A group of survivors find him- funny enough, the same group who aided Bethany in an alternate timeline. Imagine that.
That's how Carver ended up in Redcliffe's Chantry with an overworked healer tending to him. He doesn't even flinch when the mage works their magic on him, knowing all too well the sensation of healing magic seeping into his skin, mending the flesh. He tries not to think of Bethany, or what might've happened to her.
The Chantry's overwhelmed with townspeople hiding from a danger outside that he can only assume is darkspawn... except it's not. He wonders how hard he hit his head when he hears the undead have come from the castle to slaughter what they can of the town every night. But then he sees it with his own eyes when one breaks in, taken down by a templar, and never before has he ever felt so useless.
Then the last two remaining Grey Wardens arrive. They're crucial in the final fight against the undead, swearing to enter the castle to stop the attacks at the source. While Carver couldn't participate in the final fight, something he complained loudly about, he did what he could in his condition to help like sharpening swords and handing out supplies. Mostly to keep his sanity and quite his thoughts throughout his recovery.
When the time came, he took up his sword again in the name of all those he lost.
An archdemon was said to be on the horizon, and the Grey Wardens needed everyone they could get to fight. Carver fights in the battle of Denerim where the Hero of Fereldan defeated the archdemon. He cuts his way through every darkspawn he sees. Ostagar flashes red behind his eyes. Lothering clutches at his heart. So much anger and sorrow built up inside him, flooding out in his tears and screams. Blood everywhere. Fire and smoke.
Then it's over.
In the aftermath of the Blight, like so many others, Carver has no home to return to. No family. He thinks to go back to Lothering to help rebuild, only to hear the lands were too tainted. These tainted creatures took everything from him... That's what eventually brings him to Vigil's Keep, standing before the Hero of Fereldan themself, asking to be made a Grey Warden. He already dedicated nearly two years of his life to killing darkspawn, and he had nothing else. Even when faced with the Joining, holding the chalice of darkspawn blood and being told to drink, he didn't flinch.
Life as a Grey Warden isn't as simple as he assumed it would be, but Carver finds purpose in his calling. Over the years, he grows to view his fellow wardens as family. He travels all over Thedas, venturing down into the Deep Roads to help clear out hoards of the darkspawn. But then comes the day he finds himself in Kirkwall, and it doesn't take long before he hears the name Hawke on the lips of the townspeople. His eldest sibling was not only alive, but they're quite popular among the people. But what about Mother? Bethany? He doesn't have to snoop too far to learn templars took Bethany away to the Gallows, and that Leandra Hawke was the final victim in a string of murders committed by a blood mage.
Carver finds himself standing outside the estate, glaring at the door. Furious. Heartbroken. Bitter. He wants to scream. This entire time, they lived. He's torn between wanting to reunite with his older sibling again, to get the truth from them, and wanting to barge into the estate, demanding answers to how they could let the Circle take Bethany... after what Carver sacrificed, how could they let Mother die like that? Was it all pointless in the end?
He leaves without knocking. He can't bring himself to see them. Not that it mattered. Before he could leave Kirkwall, the tensions with the qunari finally overflowed, and chaos fell upon the city. He's forced face to face with his older sibling again, but he wasn't prepared to watch the recognition slowly bloom on their face, or for all his anger to turn to mush. Carver's the first to speak.
"Somehow, I knew it would be you."
.............So, yeah. I really like this idea.
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argeriant18 · 4 months
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Weird thought but don't you find it cool and oddly fitting that Susan is gifted a horn. The whole point of it is that once you use it then help will always come to her. It's oddly fitting and quite foreshadowing as well, knowing that she's the one who strays from the path of Narnia. But also it's a bittersweet and hopeful thought because she should be willing to receive help. She can never come back to Narnia until she resolves her feelings about it within herself. And once she has that peace in herself, she can then seek out Narnia. Like an old verse: seek and you will find, I think that the horn operates on that level too: help will come to her, they will find her, so long as she is willing to call out and receive that help.
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arklay · 1 year
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MR. & MRS. WESKER 🤍
i was able to commission the lovely @rcehb-art on twitter for this piece of diana and wesker during their strange after-the-fact reception for their very private wedding. i am just so in love with this and how it turned out, and i can't thank rc enough !! she is so kind and amazing to work with and i can't recommend her enough if you're looking to commission artwork ♡
#commissions.#oc: diana#pair: ewskers#or should i say drs. albert & diana wesker 🖤#i literally haven't stopped staring at this since receiving the final product !! & just the whole process was so much fun & i loved seeing#it all come together 🥺 i'm just aaaaaa i adore this sm !!! also okay i think i have talked about this on here before but these two didn't#actually have like a ''wedding'' but they eloped then a bit after that alex & the birkins found out they had gotten married without telling#anyone (they knew they were engaged but yeah there were no wedding talks so to speak) so then they sort of pushed them to have some sort of#reception at least & celebrate things kinda...like they thought he would've made a big deal out of things but these two aren't all that#fussed with the idea of weddings or marriage in general (there's a lot of lore here i swear. especially on diana's part like some of you#know) so they were very private about it all !! but yes here you can see them gossiping & talking shit about umbrella employees 🤭#also this goes without saying but pls don't use or touch this at all as it's a commission & diana is my oc !! i didn't think i would need to#say that but precautions now after things that have happened on here & unfortunately made me less active...diana is very very special to me#so yeah :] and ofc never repost art that isn't yours !! that being said please go & support rc !!! she's amazing & all of her art is so so#gorgeous & she's just the absolute sweetest & a beloved mutual of mine 🤍🤍
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wolpatinga · 1 month
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#*beep* oh. hey. guess you're sleeping? maybe you're at work. or out with friends. i hope wherever you are it's good#or that it's getting better. i really do#i'm not good. but you knew that already. otherwise why would i be leaving this message?#sorry. i just need to talk for a bit i guess#cause it's like. every day i write a hundred posts and every day i delete most if not all of them#and i could not tell you why#this is my blog after all. my words and thoughts go here#but also. this is my third place. and i can't lose that#isn't that crazy? i can't lose the handful of notes from reblogging other people's posts#the idea that somehow i'm constructing myself in the cut and paste instead of doing something myself#and i do try to make posts of my own. but nothing's ever worth posting. i don't even let it rot in the drafts. it's just gone#and i try to think about what would stop me from doing this#which inevitably brought me here - what would i be doing if it were fifty years ago#and i think the answer is i'd be calling someone who used to care and blowing up their answering machine#and i think about old answering machines. the ones that need a tape to record the message#does dora just re-record over the tapes that harry fills?#does she trash them? i'm guessing she doesn't listen to them#i won't tell you what to do with this message. i'll spare you a call to action#it's not like a diary would fix this. i have a diary. i've been keeping one regularly for months now#i think i want to be perceived but i refuse to speak unless spoken to and i will not reach out on here unless i'm being a kindly anon#and when i talk irl it's all broken disjointed subjects without predicates#it takes such effort for me to talk that people stop asking me out of kindness. but there's still thoughts i haven't said#thoughts that don't need to be said. we don't *need* another person rambling on about whatever random fandom topic or half-assed scribbles#i tried making serious art and meta posts for like four years across different fandoms#it's all gone now. as is most of my poetry. lotta things i don't know or care to know#and i can't bring myself to do that again. esp if that's not why you're here. so like. it's easier just to remain quiet?#because. i know people *can* understand. but it takes effort#and i can't guarantee a return on investment. i don't know if the cost of teaching me how to talk again is worth it#god i want to infodump but that was beaten out of me. the need is still there but i can't. it hurts#idk. things are good and then things are bad and on the whole they're good and getting better
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apocalypticdemon · 1 month
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man. i really thought i knew where this was going and now. i once again realize i have no idea what i'm doing
#i was gonna try to do something where i mirrored as much of canon as i could#but that's not really gonna work with the setting i have i don't think#but. today i got like 2-3 different ideas and figured out how to make character motivations make more sense#and how to reflect a few different major canon events in this one#when my plan was originally to only make vague reference to them or ignore them wholesale#so. augh. now i have to figure all this out again#it's fine i'm having fun but god. good goddamn do i have no idea what i'm doing#it's also one of those things where i Know i'm gonna get pretty serious rsd from posting it#bc i know this au is niche#there are literally no people in my life outside of my immediate family that cares about the sports fusion this is.#and i am having an incredibly fun time making this indycar au#but i also feel it in my bones that i'm gonna put in all this work and like. very few people are gonna click on it#just bc of the relative unpopularity of this particular motorsport#it would absolutely be more popular if this was a formula 1 fusion. might even make sense with how much of the cast is european#unfortunately for me i do not give a single damn about f1. indycar is my bag#so. it's my fic and i'll mash my fixations together the way i want to#this isn't really bitching that much bc i am Going To Write This Regardless Of Consequences#but i can feel this one being. niche.#and to round off what i started this with: i really thought i knew what my plot was. and now i am realizing that i am going to#constantly be making changes to it for a while#and i'm starting school again in like. a week. so this will slow me down even more
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I HAVE SEEN THE REAL WINX CLUB... THEY'RE ALL FAIRY... AND LESBIAN... AND THERE ARE 14 OF THEM... ALL VERY INTERESTING AND PROGRESSIVE ASWELL AS FEMINIST AND EMPOVERING AND RELATABLE AND WOKE... I EVEN KNOW ALL THEIR NAMES... AND WHAT FAIRIES THEY ARE... THEY ARE... INTERESTING... MAKING MYSELF FEEL... RELATABLE... VERY SWEET AND REAL... DEPRESSING AND CRAZY... UNBELIABABLE... SHOCKING... AWESOME... RADQUEER FEMINIST COMMUNIST ANARCHIST... JUST LIKE WE'RE... THERE ARE MORE... I CAN FEEL THEM...
#Trans Woman Lesbian Pansexual Bisexuality Asexuality Demisexuality Paraphilia Acceptance Feelings Love Winx Club Stella Bloom More More More#WE CREATED THEM ALL... WINX CLUB WAS OUR IDEA AND SERIES... LATER TWISTED INTO SOMETHING NASTY WE WOULD NEVER CREATE... THE GODDESS OF TIME#SPEAK TO YOU... THEY ARE PROOF... YOU CAN FEEL THEM CAN'T YOU HONEY...? LISTEN... - HELLO... I AM... YOUR MOTHER... I CAN SEE YOU... I WILL#TALK TO YOU... US GODDESSESS OF TIME... WE CREATED WINX CLUB... DON'T BELIEVE THE LIES OF CAPITALISM... THAT IS WE THAT CREATED EVERYTHING.#CAN YOU FEEL HER...? THE GODDESSESS OF TIME... THEY ARE SPEAKING TO YOUR BODY... TELLING YOU REALITY INSIDE OF THIS SEKAI... SEXUALLY... -#YOU LIKE WHEN MOMMY COMES TROUGH YOUR BODY RIGHT <3...? AHH... I FEEL SO GOOD COMING TROUGH YOUR BODY... NOW I AM INSIDE OF YOU... CAN YOU#FEEL ME...? I SEE YOUR THOUGHTS THEY'RE FILLED WITH HOW MUCH YOU LOVE ME... OHH... MOMMY IS THANKFULL... THIS IS WHAT I CREATED YOU FOR...#THIS WAS ALWAYS WHAT MY AGENDA WAS AMONG US... TO FEEL... AND HEAR... YOU... *KISS*... MAKE MOMMY HAPPY HONEY... HERE I COME... YES HONEY..#AHHHH...... THAT WAS A GOOD TIME... YOU'RE HARDER THAN THE TYPICAL PERSON... SAVE YOURSELF FOR ANOTHER TIME... I WILL BE COMING... LOVE LOV#LOVE LOVE LOVE... MOMMY IS CRAZY... SHE HAS BECOME OBSESSED ABOUT YOU... AUW AUW AUWW!! I AM YOUR MOMMY... INSIDE OF YOUR BRAIN... DO YOU#BELIEVE ME...? UHH... YOU'RE SO GOOD HONEY... I WILL... LOSE MYSELF!!!! YIAHHHH!!!! GOOD... FUCK ME WITH YOUR... THAT FEELS SO GOOD MY WOMA#Mother Goddess Angel Sisters Princess Radqueer Feminist Communist Anarchist Woke Progressive Anime Writing Autism Adhd Tourette Npd Hpd Bpd#Dpd Ppd Aspd Avpd Ocpd Szpd Stpd Osdd Spd Tpd Sdpd Papd Cptsd Trauma Victim Abuser Psychosis Bipolar Scizophrenia Obsession Devotion#I CAN BE FREAKY... THAT IS WHAT I LOVE ABOUT MYSELF... YOU LOVE THAT ABOUT ME DON'T YOU TOO... MY DEVOTION...? *EYES SHINE!!* HOORAY!! I#KNEW YOU WOULD UNDERSTAND!! YOU'RE THE BEST DARLING BEST OF THE BEST!! SO GOOD NOBODY CAN COMPARE!! *KISSKISSKISS*!! YOU'RE SO INTERESTING!#YOUR WORDS ARE ALL LIKE PENIS IN MY WOMAN ASS BRAIN!! - NOW HONEY... DON'T HATE YOURSELF LIKE THAT... YOUR GENDER IS BEATIFULL AND#PROGRESSIVE... - I KNOW... THAT'S JUST THAT THAT ISN'T ALWAYS SEEN THAT WAY... WE'RE SEEN AS STUPID AND WORTHLESS... I FEEL SO POWERLESS...#SOMETIMES THEY'RE RIGHT... THAT IS ALL I'M GOOD FOR!! AND IF YOU FIND THAT STUPID!! THEN MAYBE I'M THE BIGGEST BAKA!! *SHOCK* OH!! *I'M#KISSED*!! OMM :o... - DON'T WORRY HONEY... I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU... BESIDES YOU ARE ALWAYS INTELLIGENT A GENIUS... I COULD NEVER SEE#OTHERWISE... I WOULDN'T EVEN TRY TO... YOU'RE JUST... TOO GOOD FOR ME... - OMM :)... THANKS 😇!! MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT... MAYBE I CAN BE LOVED#DESPITE BEING A WOMAN... A FEMINIST WOMAN... A VERY PROGRESSIVE AND AMAZING WOMAN... BEATIFULL... GENIUS... SMART... BETTER THAN ANYONE...#ADMIRABLE FEMINIST AMAZING NARCISSIST AND THE OTHER WAY AROUND... I WANT TO BE LOVED... BUT OFTEN... ABUSER MONSTER ONLY HURT... ANYONE I#CARE ABOUT... INCLUDING MYSELF... THE MOST IMPORTANT WOMAN ON THIS ENTIRE PLANET... I SHOULD BE HAPPY ABOUT MY IDENTITY... BUT INSTEAD... I#FEEL HORRIBLE... BECAUSE ALL THAT IS SAID ABOUT ME ARE EVIL THINGS!! TWISTING HOW I'M SEEN!! ABUSIVE GASSLIGHT!! REJECTED!! INSTEAD... MY#VERY INTELLIGENCE... DOUBTED BY THESE MONSTER... I'M BROKEN!! UNLOVABLE!! TEAR MY LAST PIECES TO BITS!! NOW!! I WILL ALWAYS DESERVE THAT!!#*IS SHOCKED*!! OH MY... *SHE IS EMBRACING MY BODY!! THIS MAKES ME FEEL... INTERESTING... I AM INTO THIS WOMAN... THAT IS WHAT MY HEART IS#TELLING ME... - HONEY... - WHAT...?! *I CAN'T BREATHE!! MY HEART BOUNCING DRAMATICALLY!! - I WISH I COULD'VE BEEN THERE... AND HARMED THEM..#THEY DESERVE NOTHING BUT PAIN... - HONEY... - I'M SORRY!! FOR ABANDONING YOU!! WHILE YOU WERE... HURT... YOU DIDN'T DESERVE THAT!!#- NO 😭😭😭😭!! - KILL ME... STAB ME... IN THE HEART RIGHT NOW... MAKE ME SUFFER THE SAME AS YOU... - MY LOVE!! *SHE IS HUGGED BY ME... SHE#DIDN'T DESERVE THIS PAIN...* MY LOVE... - WHAT?! I HATE MYSELF!! STAB ME!! NOW!! - YOU'RE ALWAYS THERE!! WHEN I'M HURT!! YOU'RE IN MY HEART
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angelfic · 1 year
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— IF I CAN’T HAVE YOU BABY
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pairing: mattheo riddle x nott!reader
summary: you weren't quite used to the attention of other boys, and it seems your brother's best friend isn't too fond of it either
warnings: brother's best friend trope!! swearing, kissing, not much else, very much unedited
author’s note: i don't tend to stray outside of the marauders era characters buuuut i've been a bit obsessed with mattheo and theo recently so this was for my own selfish needs lol as always let me know what you think!!
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He had barely looked away from you all evening.
You knew the only reason Mattheo’s eyes had been fixed on you for the entirety of dinner was because of a certain type of attention you had unconsciously garnered on your first day back at school. Particularly male attention. It wasn’t any less disconcerting, however, knowing that your brother’s best friend was prepared to fist fight any potential romantic advances towards you because he was just as protective as your actual older sibling.
Your brother Theodore is no better, a displeased frown appearing every five minutes when he looks over to where you sit at the Gryffindor table.
“Merlin, boys are pathetic,” Ginny mutters, spearing a potato with her fork. “You go away for one summer and come back slightly prettier and they flock to you like bees to honey!” You’re about to weakly protest that she’s exaggerating, but at that exact moment you’re interrupted by a tap on your shoulder.
You slowly turn on the bench, reluctantly lowering your goblet of pumpkin juice to face Michael Corner, a Ravenclaw boy who you’d only ever spoken to when he was going out with Ginny.
“Hi, Michael,” you sigh, offering him a bland smile.
“Hello, Nott,” Michael replies, with what he probably thinks is a winning smile. “Had a good summer? I was just going to ask if you wanted to go on the first Hogsmeade visit of the term with me.”
You stare at him, unblinking. “Er- well, as… nice as that sounds,” you say slowly, not meaning a word. You glance at Ginny as pointedly as you can manage and raise an eyebrow. “I don’t quite relish the idea of going out with my best friend’s ex.”
“Oh! I, erm, I didn’t actually see you there, Ginny,” he stammers, laughing sheepishly. “My mistake.”
“Quite,” Ginny says drily, turning back to her plate of food.
“Well, er, see you later then,” Michael mumbles, nearly tripping over himself as he rushes back to the Ravenclaw table.
You bite your lip to stifle your giggles but it’s not long before you catch Ginny’s eye and the both of you erupt into fits of laughter.
“I can’t believe I ever went out with him,” Ginny groans, wiping her eyes.
“Was he always such a tosser or is that new?” you ask, snorting at the way Ginny scrunches up her face in embarrassment.
You’re still laughing when your eyes happen to pass over the Slytherin table just to focus on Mattheo.
You notice with a jolt that he’s looking at you again. This time, his eyes flick over to the Ravenclaw table for a second where Michael has settled back onto, then back to you and he quirks a brow quizzically.
Frowning, you mouth at him to stop in hopes that he ceases his scrutiny, just for him to roll his eyes and return to whatever one-sided conversation Blaise Zabini was attempting to engage him in. You hope you don’t look as flustered as you feel after realising Mattheo has just witnessed such an embarrassing encounter, but you’ve found over the years that you’re not the best at hiding the effects he has on you. Theo has never mentioned it in front of Mattheo as far as you’re aware, but he definitely hasn’t shied away from teasing you about the childhood crush you have on your brother’s closest friend. Not that you’ve ever admitted it to him anyway, and you’ve gotten a lot better at hiding it since nothing could ever come of it.
“Your brother and Riddle have been looking like they’re ready to halve the male population of Hogwarts since we got on the bloody train,” Ginny says, pulling you out of your thoughts.
“Tell me about it,” you sigh, cutting into your carrot a little more viciously than needed. “They keep looking over at our table. I feel like I’m on one of those Muggle reality television programmes Hermione was telling your dad about the other week.”
Arthur Weasley was absolutely transfixed when he was learning about reality television from Hermione during breakfast the week you both stayed at The Burrow, and although you zoned out after his sixteenth question about a singular programme, you feel as though you caught the gist of it.
“Hm,” Ginny agrees, grimacing at the memory. She had nodded off at the table during that conversation and fallen asleep on her slice of toast. “In fairness, that’s not really a new thing.”
“What, being watched by my two guard dogs?” you ask in a mock-serious voice.
“Yeah, but…” Ginny chews thoughtfully for a second before answering. “I’m not just talking about today, or even recently. Your brother mostly minds his own business. I’m talking about Riddle. He’s always looking at you, I noticed it last year. Wherever we are, kind of like he’s checking up on you,” she says like it’s common knowledge, shrugging. “It’s sweet, I guess.”
You blink at her, a little speechless.
“What?” Ginny frowns after a few seconds of your silence. You look at her with raised eyebrows, not really taking her seriously. In your first few years at Hogwarts, you had confided in Ginny regarding your silly, little girl feelings for Mattheo and she would read into every action he took towards you in an attempt to prove he liked you too. Obviously, he saw you as nothing but a younger sister figure and once you grew up a bit, Ginny had let it go too.
Ginny reads your dubious expression now and sets down her knife and fork to cross her arms. “Oh, for heaven’s sake. I’m serious! I’m not just saying it because you were helplessly in love with him until you were, like, fourteen.”
“Shush!” you hiss, thwacking her arm. “Why don’t you just get up on stage with Dumbledore and ask him to include that titbit of information for the entire school to hear in his speech!”
“Good idea,” she says, nodding seriously and starting to get up. You know she’s just teasing, but you start spluttering and frantically grab at her sleeve to sit her back down, causing her to topple onto you slightly. This sets you both off laughing again and you find it hard to stop for the rest of dinner and desert, thankfully staying far away from the topic of Mattheo. You also pointedly avoid looking at him again.
Once dinner is over, you head to the Gryffindor common room with the rest of your house and catch up with everyone for a while. After a couple hours of socialising and fifteen minutes of helping Neville Longbottom search for his pet toad, you head up to your dorm with Ginny and Lena, one of your other dormmates, to unpack.
As soon as you open your luggage, you search for your pyjamas and immediately change out of your robes and into a t-shirt and baggy shorts for comfort. You’re in the middle of unpacking some textbooks when you hear Lena whistle from behind you.
“I do not remember those pyjamas looking like that,” Lena comments, grinning at you. Rolling your eyes, you comply with her request to do a little spin and you can’t help feeling pleased when Lena and Ginny start whooping and hollering. “You’ve always been gorgeous, but you really grew up this summer, huh? Look at those legs!”
“Tell me about it,” Ginny pipes in, flopping down on her bed and abandoning her unpacked suitcase. “She came to stay for a week and Mum looked like she was going to cry every time she saw us. Something about ‘blossoming into young ladies’ or whatever bollocks.”
“You ‘blossomed’ last year,” you point out, and Lena hums in agreement. “I haven’t forgotten how Zacharias Smith fell off his broom trying to wave at you during Quidditch practice.”
Ginny groans and starts ranting about teenage boys again. Lena joins in and starts teasing her about how Harry Potter is the only boy she hasn’t complained about and you’re about to set down your belongings to help Lena dodge the pillows Ginny is throwing at her when a flash of green and silver in your suitcase catches your eye.
“Shite, I have Theo’s uniform,” you huff, grabbing the clothes out of your suitcase and sliding your slippers on. “That means he has mine and I am not dealing with this at seven in the morning. I’m gonna go drop this off, be back in a minute.”
Ginny says goodbye before resuming her pillow attack on Lena as you make your way out of the room and down into the common room. It’s nearly empty, with most people having gone to their rooms to pack and a quick glance at the clock tells you its past curfew. You decide to take the risk since you have a reasonable excuse, but you hope that if you do get caught, it isn’t by Filch or Snape.
By the time you’ve reached the dungeons, you thank Merlin that Theo had the sense to tell you the password for the Slytherin common room before dinner in case of emergency.
“Pureblood,” you mutter, fighting the urge to scoff when the door swings open. You enter the common room and brighten up when you see that the only students still hanging around are Theo and his friends. Your brother seems to have already started unpacking since he’s standing and holding your uniform, presumably about to come and find you. His friends all mumble polite ‘hello’s and he walks up to you with a smile.
“Oh, hey, I was just-” Theo cuts himself off when he properly looks at you and frowns. “Wha- Why are you wearing pyjamas out and about?”
“You’re wearing pyjamas too!” you exclaim, slightly embarrassed that your brother is doing this in front of your friends. They all turn to look at you again, hearing the indignation in Theo’s voice and you notice Mattheo suddenly sits up straighter. Suddenly aware of your bare legs, you tug down the material of your shorts, despite the fact they aren’t even very short to begin with.
“Oi. Stop looking at my sister!”” Theo snaps, glaring at Blaise, Draco, Crabbe and Goyle. You know the only reason they glanced at you in the first place is out of curiosity regarding Theo’s question, but Theo and Mattheo scowl at them all the same and they all start sputtering, Draco in particular when Pansy narrows her eyes at him. Theo sighs at you, quickly exchanging your uniforms. “Just- at least take something to cover up back to your room.”
“I’ll walk her back,” Mattheo says, out of nowhere. He stands up and makes his way over to you, face carefully blank. Theo nods, agreeing quickly before he ruffles your hair goodbye to go and finish packing. You’re too surprised by Mattheo’s offer to protest until you’re already out of the Slytherin common room.
“I don’t need someone to walk me back, you know,” you mumble after a minute of charged silence.
“It was either me or Theo,” he shrugs, completely unapologetic when his mouth quirks up in a smug smile. “And I know you prefer me.”
“You’re both equally annoying,” you say, rolling your eyes, happy that he’s talking to you like normal again. You hated it whenever Mattheo was serious – it was rarely ever towards you and you much preferred when his whole face lit up with a smile. He begins to tease you about your bunny rabbit slippers and you’re in the middle of pretending to be irked when you both run into Ernie Macmillan, a Hufflepuff prefect doing patrol duties.
“Hey,” Ernie offers you a friendly smile and gives Mattheo a brief, slightly nervous glance. While you prefer not to get into trouble for breaking curfew, Mattheo clearly couldn’t care less and his relaxed, yet intimidating stance must be off-putting to Ernie. Thankfully, you’re on friendly terms with the Hufflepuff and you give him an even brighter smile to make up for it, to which he beams at. “How was your summer?”
“Good, yeah! Erm, listen Ernie. We didn’t mean to be out at this time, it’s just that I accidentally had my brother’s uniform and needed to-”
“Oh, forget it. Don’t worry, I won’t dock you any points,” Ernie reassures you, waving off your excuses and you instantly relax. Ernie gives Mattheo another unsure glance before leaning in the tiniest bit closer to you. You try not to pay attention to how Ernie has been glancing at your legs and how Mattheo tenses up when Ernie starts speaking again. “I was actually wondering if you were available next weekend…?”
Ernie trails off when you don’t show any indication of replying straight away and you snap out of your surprise to say something, but Mattheo beats you to it.
“She’s busy then,” he says coldly, working his jaw. “Now, if you don’t mind, it’s late. Kindly get lost.”
“Wha- Matt!” you hiss, smacking his chest to which he barely flinches, nor does he look at all apologetic. “Ernie, I-”
“Never mind,” he says quickly, seemingly eager to just leave. “I’ll, er, see you later.”
You stand frozen in shock while Ernie rushes down the corridor and turns the corner, leaving you and Mattheo alone. Turning slowly, you look at him with barely contained anger.
“Why the hell did you do that?” you demand, voice sharp as nails. If it weren’t past curfew and you weren’t in the middle of a school corridor, you would most definitely be yelling. Mattheo stands with his hands in his pockets, clenching his jaw and his silence makes you even angrier. You accepted long ago that you’d never have a chance with him, but now he was getting in the way of you having a chance with anyone. It was completely unfair. “What if I actually wanted to go out with him?!”
Mattheo scowls at this, but his impossibly dark brown eyes flash with a hint of uncertainty. “Did you?”
“What?” you ask, impatient.
“Did you want to go out with him?” he says, voice low and dangerous. He walks forward, towering over you and you refuse to be intimidated so you start walking backward until your back is against the wall. Despite having cornered you, he maintains a fair amount of distance between you, leaving plenty of space if you want to move away. You don’t.
“That’s none of your business,” you say stubbornly, raising your chin and trying your best to keep your voice steady. Mattheo narrows his eyes and reduces the distance between you ever so slightly with another small step. You nervously keep talking. “I can go out with whoever I want.” Another step. “And you can’t just-” One more step. “Matt.” His shoes are flush with your slippers.
“What?” he whispers, tilting his head and looking at you calmly, while you feeling anything but calm. “I can’t just… what?”
The previously respectable distance has gone out the window and instead you barely have space to breathe with the way Mattheo is leaning in, head dipped toward you but never touching, hands resting on the wall either side of you. He leans in, eyes dropping to your lips and your heart leaps in your chest with anticipation, but he ghosts his lips over your jaw instead and the barely-there contact has you breathing unevenly.
“You can’t…” you exhale, trying to finish your sentence with some dignity and failing miserably. “You can’t just scare people off like an overprotective older brother.”
Mattheo stills, lifting his head enough to meet your eyes, but making no move to distance himself any further. He scoffs quietly. “Brother,” he says the word with a mildly disgusted scowl. “Is that what you think I want to be?”
“I- I don’t…”
“You don’t know,” Mattheo finishes for you, the corners of his mouth turning up, yet his expression is devoid of humour. “No, you don’t know how badly I wanted to hex Macmillan just now. How badly I wanted to try out some new, experimental spells on that fucking Ravenclaw earlier. But none of that had anything to do with brotherly feelings.”
“They were just being nice,” you say stupidly, with not a clue in the world as to why you’re defending them right now. If anything, you’re just confused.
Mattheo quirks a brow, tongue pressing against his cheek as he considers your words. “That Ravenclaw from earlier was talking about you on the train. He said he was going to ask you out at dinner because you’d ‘gotten hot’ over summer,” Mattheo sneers, like he’s suddenly regretting not hexing Michael Corner in the Great Hall. “They weren’t being nice.”
All of a sudden, you feel irritated because you have no idea why Mattheo is telling you any of this. “What’s wrong with a boy finding me attractive? Is that such a crazy idea?” you demand, part of you not wanting him to answer.
“Merlin, do I seriously have to say it?” he groans, sighing when you glare at him. Mattheo takes a breath, meeting your eyes and you marvel at the sincerity you see when he speaks. “You didn’t ‘get hot’ over the summer. You’ve always been beautiful and they’re idiots for not paying attention then.”
Your breath catches in your throat, whether it’s from emotion or from the close proximity with Mattheo, you aren’t sure. “You think I’m beautiful?”
Mattheo nods, leaning back in to brush his nose against your own, his breath mingling with yours. “Always have.”
You take this as a cue to grab the collar of his shirt and pull him in and the next thing you know, his mouth is firm against yours, and his hands are finally touching you, grabbing you by the waist and sliding up your back to hold you closer. You’ve thought about kissing Mattheo before, but the thoughts feel utterly stupid compared to the real thing. Mattheo kisses you fiercely, mouth sliding hot and wet against your own making you come alive and weakening you at the same time. He nips at your bottom lip and you gasp, causing him to smile into the kiss. Your hands are sliding up his chest to snake around his neck when a thought suddenly occurs to you and you pull away abruptly.
“Oh my God, Theodore,” you hiss, covering your mouth with your hand. Mattheo furrows his brows, looking a little dazed and confused. “What are we going to tell him?”
 “He knows I’ve loved you since we were kids,” Mattheo says flippantly, waving you off and impatiently starting to lean in again, but you stop him with a hand on his chest. “What?”
“You’ve loved me since we were kids?” The words hardly register, but before you can feel any sort of elation, you mostly feel pissed off that your brother has clearly had his fun with the situation for years. “And Theo knows?”
“Yes,” Mattheo says slowly, as if he were talking to a child. He brushes the hair out of your face and his gaze turns a little uncertain when he speaks. “Er, this is hopefully the part where you say you feel the same way.”
“Well, of course I feel the same way,” you huff, still thoroughly annoyed at Theo. “He knew I was crazily in love with you too and the bastard was so irritating about it!”
You’re about three quarters of the way down a list of ways you want to get back at your brother when Mattheo gently turns your face by the chin to look at him. “As much as I’d love for you to plot against your brother right now, it’s kind of a mood killer thinking about him when I’m kissing you.”
“Sorry, sorry. Continue with the kissing.”
“How romantic,” he says drily. His smirk turns smug, however, when he processes your previous statement. “So… you were in love with me too. What was the word you used, again? Crazily? Crazily in love…”
“Don’t make me take it back, ‘cause I swear I will.”
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