#i know people who lobe me are reading this and im sorry

[sensitivegoblin]

Vent

Tw: sh

[noemilivv]

hello!! thank you so much for squeezing me in 💕 i hope you're doing well

i use all pronouns and im asexual demiromantic. i have no preference for the gender of the character

my mbti is infj <3

personality wise, im a patient person. im touchy with close friends and family, otherwise i actively avoid touch. im quiet until im with friends, and i enjoy being in the presence of people and not having to do the same thing? [like i could be painting and they could be writing! we don't have to do an activity together to enjoy being together 🤭]. im otherwise i actively avoid touch. im quiet until im with friends, and i enjoy being in the presence of people and not having to do the same thing? [like i could be painting and they could be writing! we don't have to do an activity together to enjoy being together]. im honest and can be a little too blunt at times. im big on communication, it's how all relationships thrive - familial, platonic or romantic. im very careful about who i trust, so people need to show effort in befriending me. im quite observant with people's body language and their tone of voice. i enjoy banter every now and again but it helps when we both know when to draw the line. im not all that fond of technology and like to do other activities while i can, but i do admit it's useful to have! [all the music at my fingertips]. i love having philosophical talks with people too.

my hobbies include writing, painting, sewing and reading!! im also hoping to learn guitar at some point. i enjoy ballroom dancing but it's not something i do too often. my music taste switches from jazz, to metal to indie repeatedly -

im hyperfixated on the band ghost, and sleep token!! if you ask me about prey animals such as deer, bunnies, or cows i WILL talk your head off. im also OBSESSED with the crow [brandon lee] and the labyrinth [david bowie]. i have a soft spot for tim burton films too!!

my love languages are quality time and gift giving. im not entirely opposed to the other love languages but i definitely need to be warned before touch occurs or we've already established that we're both okay with touching each other. i personally prefer creating personalised gifts by engraving intricate patterns into pockets, writing them letters or just creating a little gift bag of the things they've had their eyes on

appearance-wise, im pretty short. roughly around 5'1-5'3. im also chubby but that's not something i get insecure about often - that doesn't mean i flaunt my figure or anything though, just simply indifferent. i like dying my hair but my go to colour is a dark ashy purple. i only have my lobes and my septum pierced but im considering getting more. im very pale and im absolutely covered in freckles. as for wardrobe, i either dress like a manic pixie dream girl or i go all out as morticia addams.

i enjoy helping people out, but if it requires physical lifting, then it's a no can do, due to my disability limiting what i can and can't lift

all and all, i just need someone to respect my boundaries and be patient enough with me to make it work

im so sorry that it's so long! if you need me to cut things down, im more than willing to 🫶💗 have a beautiful day

i know i said i was done with matchups but i promised this individual a matchup and i just got submitted the request so i’m doing it now.

anywho, i pair you with…

Husk !!

Husk is very open about communication, as he’s very honest, so that’s not really something you need to worry about in your relationship

He’s not much of a gift giver, but he appreciates everything you get him, and he’ll try to sneak in a present or two as a ‘thank you’. But in my eyes, Husk is more of a acts of service and words of affirmation kinda guy (in terms of giving)

You both banter a lot, he tries not to go to overboard, but due to his bluntness sometimes he’ll occasionally slip up, but hey, everyone does it at some point

[mini-games]

AH okay sorry PERCY JACKSON HAS ME IN A CHOKEHOLD AAA

im going through a massive ToA phase too but obv won't spoil :3

ANYGAYS what's your favorite character so far?? Personally I'd say Zoe or Luke and maybe Nico

hrngggg I love them all waugh

Percy JUST like me fr, Annabeth girlboss, Grover also just like me fr, Nico also just like me fr (tbf all of them are just like me fr).... waugh going through the character list in my head and I love them all... Luke is incredibly amazing and I love how he's written AND

okay I'm gonna keep rambling under cut I think (I think there's someone in the server who said they were planning on reading it SO spoilers lmao)

I LOVE how he was a twist villain???? Like you could see it the entire time but you never fully realize it until he. Y'know. I ALSO LOVE HOW HE KEEPS CALLING PERCY "cuz" LIKE???? He's still trying to get Percy to join him because he genuinely cares about him but is trying to push that away for his own goals AND

I cannot tell you HOW MANY TIMES I have wanted to take a bite out of these books. I have only resisted biting them because I am borrowing them from my sister waugh.....

ANYWAYS I have no favorite character I lobe them all equally

Also I asked several people who they thought my godly parent would be and everyone gave me two answers. All of them had Hermes as one of them (except for my mom, who said "either ares or demeter") SO

Anyways who do you think my godly parent would be. Just in general. I know we don't interact much ooc because you aren't highly active in the discord BUT most answers for that is incredibly valid anyways so

[justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms]

Hi! I was wondering if I could request a matchup for pjo/hoo and narnia if that's alright!

She/Her, Straight

MBTI: INFP

Zodiac: Sun - Sagittarius, Moon - Libra, Rising - Sagittarius

Appearance: I'm kinda tall (5'8") and a bit more on the curvy side. I have long dark brown curly hair and brown eyes that my family always describe as "doe eyes". I'm pretty pale as well. I wear glasses sometimes but most of the time I wear my contacts. I have three lobe peircings in each ear. I tend to wear a lot of hoodies and baggie jeans. I love sweaters and band tees as well. I do like to wear makeup but when I don't have the time or energy to put it on I don't bother.

Personality: I'm pretty quite most of the time. I don't really tend to open up to people until I know them a little better. Once you get me talking though I talk a lot. I'm a pretty anxious person and I tend to overthink about just about everything. Although Im shy I do love building connections and bonds with people around me. I love going out with my friends and family and would rather spend most weekends out and about then cooped up at home. Depending on the person and the situation I can get pretty easily frustrated (which is something I'm definitely trying to work on!) I'm also the type of person that won't say something if I know it's going to hurt someone else's feelings. I'm 100% considered the hopeless romantic of my friend group and can be a bit boy crazy according to my friends haha.

Likes: Summer, the color blue, baking/cooking, baseball, swimming, reading, animals, Sunsets, stargazing, camping, shopping, History, listening to music

Dislikes: Math, bugs (I hate both of these with a passion)

Thank you so so much!! :)

Hi! Thank you for your request! Sorry it took so long. I hope you like your matchups!

In Heroes of Olympus, I match you with...

You and Leo are polar opposites and that’s exactly why your relationship works. You keep each other balanced and are there to help out with things the other isn’t good at.

He’s got an inane ability to break down peoples’ walls with little difficulty so however high or strong you think your internal defences are, this guy will worm his way in no problem. He’s also very careful no to break that trust. He knows what that’s like and doesn’t want you to feel the same.

However, despite your differences, there is one key similarity: neither you nor Leo ever stop talking. The other demigods have started making bets on who will break and period of silence first.

Would love stargazing with you! Leo will pull you onto Festus and take you for a nighttime fly, so you have an uninterrupted view of the stars.

On a side note, I think you’d get along amazingly with Percy as a platonic relationship. You’d bond over a lot of things like your shared love of summer, the colour blue, and hanging out with friends.

In Narnia, I match you with...

Unlike Leo, you and Edmund are a lot more similar. You both tend to overthink things and can get easily frustrated, but you open up around those you trust.

I see Edmund as a bit of a secret hopeless romantic as well. He’ll have to overcome his embarrassment about it first but once he gets comfortable with you, expect flowers, sunset picnics, and stargazing dates galore.

Loves going to the beach with you in summer. We all saw how much all of the Pevensies liked the beach when they returned to Narnia and Edmund is no different when he’s with you.

Will get rid of bugs for you. This is a bit trickier in Narnia where all of the animals can talk so sometimes you’ll catch him quietly debating with an insect, trying to convince them to move outside or at least into a different room.

Family is an important thing for Edmund, especially after the incident with the White Witch so he’s glad you value spending time with family as well.

[plush-rabbit]

Sugar and Spice

Word Count: 2K

A/N: This is set after he passes the gym to Marnie:P I hope that you enjoyed it!! Im sorry for it being so late!! Also, since sunday was a lot,, pokemon related things will go on ao3 like tomorrow!!

Piers is a rather intimidating person. He’s tall and wears dark clothing, a certain look of disdain on his features to anyone who looks upon him. He won’t necessarily be rude to people but he has a rather flippant personality that makes it hard for people to approach him first.

You on the other hand, you try to meet him. You may not enjoy his type of music, but you do try to approach him, wanting to attend his concerts or even just listening to some of his earlier music that is different from the way he sings now. It’s softer, harsh lyrics that are whispered into your ear accompanied by static due to the low quality of the mic but you enjoy it.

Truth be told, he inspired you to start your own musical journey. Different from his genre obviously, but still. It was easy to write the music, to let the flow seep into you and sing with a lonely voice and cute look. If he could keep his dark, gloomy aesthetic, then you could keep your pastel, cheery one.

Yet, despite the hopeful encounter that you wish you could have had with him, ended horribly. He hadn’t exactly called you anything mean and while you were aware of the tone he held, it certainly didn’t prepare you to be on the receiving end of it. It was a heavy feeling that it left, an unmistakable uneasiness that made you squirm and want to leave.

And yet, you still hold a strong admiration to him. You still want to meet him and go against him in a battle even if it isn’t his strongest suit just for the fact that you believe like everyone else that a battle is what people go against, what they put all their might into and see how they can prevail at the end of it. You wanted to see the light in his eyes up close and see how he would fight.

You’re everything opposite to Piers. Where he dresses in dark clothing and has a rather cold demeanor, you dress in soft colors and try to appear friendly to others, often accompanied by your team of fairy and mostly pink colored pokémon. You spent a good portion of your youth hating pink, wanting to go against gender norms but as you grew older, you fell in love with the color and the frills, wanting to be dressed in a cute way that while others may have seen as overbearing, you just liked it and it made you happy. Where as he sang metal and rock, you stuck with pop, you wore your dresses and had even jokingly called the type of music you sang “bubblegum pop”, no real reason behind it- agains, it just made you happy to call it. Despite the differences, you greatly admired the ex- gym leader. He had been able to hold his own in a town that was failing- no fault on his of course- and had been a caring brother from what you have seen. He was an admirable person and while the music he made wasn’t exactly your taste, you could learn to enjoy it.

However, due to your rising fame and the type advantage against him, people around the region- who knew of both of you- had begun to jokingly call the two of you rivals, wanting to see you both battle it out and see who would reign above the other. And while you would have happily accepted the chance to meet Piers, a trainer you strongly admired, he had only sneered at the idea of you and him having a battle. To say it hurt would be an understatement. He’s a personal inspiration and to have him act that way to the mere mention of you left you deflated. 

It’s a mere accident that you both are in the same area. Mentions of him of you are sprinkled into your notifications, buildings that match in the background and while you aren’t proud of it, you take to following the buildings and the threads. You walk around, your white tennis skirt paired with a soft, baby blue pullover and pair or white tennis shoes, an obvious giveaway to who you are, a yellow star shaped bag that crosses over your chest, and a bow with trailing ribbons falling and curving around your shoulders, tickling at your neck with every step until you finally seem to be in a surrounding area that he was last seen at. While it left you with an odd taste, you wanted to run into him and express your admiration for him- just for a quick second, to tell him how much you liked the music he put out and how he stuck with the aesthetic- you could understand how expensive it could be to stick with something as money-consuming as clothing.

You find him by accident. It’s a completely stereotypical moment when you do. You both stand at the opposite ends of the fountain decorated with carvings of various water types from the region, the sun shines and you can see in front of you with his sister and the rising champions. You hold onto the straps of your bag, your lips pulling into a flustered line, heat that rises from excitement or general shyness- you aren’t sure yet, and you stare at him with wide eyes. In the pockets of your skirt, you can feel your phone buzz and in the corner of your eyes, you can see people hurriedly take out their phones. And just like that, the serene, very stereotypical moment is over when he turns around and your eyes meet. Where you widen and flush under his gaze, he hardens his stare and grows an annoyed look, brows furrowing and lips pulled into a thin line. 

Your resolve is broken. You gasp, and look around, seeing people stare and a small circle forming, whether for the both of you or the rising stars of the region, you don’t know and you don’t find out, choosing to leave the area. You jump a bit, standing on the tips of your shoes and you turn to leave. 

You don’t want to stick around and see what he might have to say, the thought of the smallest bit of rejection far too much on your mind. You manage to make your way into a bookstore, the scent of coffee lingering in the air and you greet the employees with a tight smile, wandering deeper into the store, hoping to distract yourself and walk between the aisles and find something to buy. 

You stand at the end of the store, against a corner as you trail your finger against the spines of the books. In your peripheral, you can spot a figure, standing tall and you pay no mind. There is no real reason for you to worry- you may not look the part, but you can certainly fight dirty and the store isn’t abandoned so you could always call for help. You hum under your breath, pulling out a book and pursing your lips as you read the synopsis. The figure at the end comes closer and you turn, a soft squeak sounds past your lips. You feel yourself stand straighter, your shoulders squaring and the book held close to your chest, fingers gripping onto it tightly, enough to pale your knuckles.

“You ran away,” Piers muses, his fingers trailing along the spines, his steps quiet against the carpet. “You must be really scared of me,” he says, looking away from you, chuckling lightly. He stands in front of you, his brows raising as he looks down at you. 

His dual colored hair is pulled into a loose ponytail, a thick part of it obscuring half of his face and you can only do so much to not cower under his gaze, eventually breaking from his eye contact and looking at the top of your shoes that differ from his. 

“‘S not that,” you mutter, biting at your bottom lip. “I just… panicked,” you end, licking at your lips. “I- I didn’t mean to offend you.” 

You were kidding yourself if you thought you could talk to him. Much less have a battle against him. Once he showed up, your resolve fell, further than it did before when he looked at you. You take a small step back, your shoes shuffling and messing at the carpet underneath, and your eyes still locked on his boots. Just a second ago, you wanted to proclaim your admiration to him, enough to go and see him and find him and yet, here he is standing in front of you without any distractions or prying eyes and you can’t bring yourself to talk to him with faltering. 

“You’re a lot jumpier than I expected, ya know?” His reply to you is done with a simple roll of his eyes. “I mean, fuck, I guess it’s expected for a type user like you.” You stay quiet and you can almost hear his smug grin. “Lots of people comment how you’re a pushover because of your, er,  type and all.”

You look up at him, your brows furrowed and frown against your lips. You lean towards him, the book still held in your hands. “It’s- So what? I like pink and fairy types! They happen to be cute and they’re strong!” Your voice starts to raise, slowly raising into a higher pitch, shoulders raiing a fraction to meet the ends of your lobes. “Plus, there are a few fairy that have a dark counterpart and Mimikyu is one that I’m going to add to my team!” Your eyes narrow and you pull away from him, crossing your arms in front of you, a scowl on your lips, face growing hot under anger. “I just happen to be,” you make a small noise of discomfort and bite the inside of your cheeks, “quieter.”

He looks taken aback, eyes wide as he blinks owlishly at you. His down turned lips start to twitch, forming into a wicked smile. He snorts and shakes his head, a pleasant sound ringing through the small corner, and you soften, your arms slowly lowering from their harsh grip. 

“You got some fire in you, huh?” He asks, tilting his head “Damn, didn’t think you had it in you to actually stand up for yourself like that.” You meet his eyes and he flashes a quick grin that reveals his teeth. “Nothing bad about it, I swear.” he holds his hands up and brushes a hand through his hair. “Anyways-” he waves a hand and you watch it with careful eyes- “you oughta be more careful about who you yell it at, as all I’m gonna say,” he muses. 

“Piers?” He hums in response and you swallow nervously. “Wh- Why did you come here?” You don’t want to accuse him of following you here, for all you know it could be a happy, little accident. “And why did you talk to me?”

His milky complexion turns into a bright pink that fills in his cheeks, a flustered look on his face where his eyes narrow. “Oh, hah, I- Marnie needed a book and I-” his hand swings around at a much faster pace, circling around in front of him with an open palm and you react instinctively.

You make a pained gasping noise, the book dropping onto the floor with a thud as your hands come up to block your face, back hunched as you try to cower under the minimal protection that you offer yourself. You whimper and take a stumbling step back that leads you against the wall, your eyes pinched shut and it’s a second too late that you realize you messed up. You gasp and straighten up, an uncomfortable heat running down your back as you meet his eyes.

He stands frozen, his hand still in midair and his eyes are wide, darting down to the book and back to where your hands still hold a semi-protective barrier against him. His eyes turn from shocked into pitiful and you break away from his gaze, mumbling an apology under your breath.

“Shit,” he hisses out, bringing his hands close to his body. “I didn’t mean to trigger you or-”

“It’s not that,” you respond quickly. “I- Can we not talk about it?” You turn to look at him, your bottom lip trembling ever so slightly, your eyes glancing back to the fallen book. “Please?” He nods slowly and you return it in response. You crouch down to grab the book and pull it close to you only to look back at it with disdain. You turn and place the book back into the shelf, your hands coming down to play with the hem of your skirt. 

It’s silent. The soft music that plays from the music is not enough to drown the silence between the both of you and you want to chastise yourself for ruining a moment with your fears. Your teeth bite into the soft part of your cheeks, painful and enough to make tears spring into your eyes. In your pocket, your phone buzzes and you fail to pick it up, too frozen to care about the outside world. 

“Do you want to get a coffee?” You look up at him and he gives you a hesitant smile. He jerks his chin to the other side, his hands inside his coat pockets. “I was thinking of getting a cup while I was here,” he clears his throat, “I could get you one if you want. We can drink it here too,” he adds quickly.

You give him a tentative smile, slowly pulling yourself away from the wall and taking a step closer to him. “Do you want to look for Marnie’s book first? I don’t- I don’t mind.” 

“Right,” he says slowly, “her book. The uh- you know, let me message her to see what the title was, yeah?” He nods his head and moves to the side, jerking his head to allow you to walk in front of him first. “Let’s just get a drink first, all right?” He gives you a nervous smile, laughing quietly with eyes that come to a close. You come to stand next to him, nodding softly, your hands flexing at your sides in an attempt to calm down. “Neat,” he says. “Let’s get a cup

[aescapisms]

Hey, how are you? I really hope that you're doing great! But if you don't I hope you'll get through it soon. I wish you get to read this message, (If Tumblr doesn't eat my ask) because I wanted to say that I enjoy and appreciate your works especially Bucky SMAUs.

Your Social Media Aus are really different from the others. There's something special about it that every single time I read it, it never fails to make me giggling like a child 💓. I love how you make the reader is chaotic, I love how much memes you used every chapter, I lobe how relatable the reader is, and I love your sense of humour, everything about it, it's just special.

I've been through some hard times last year and then I found your fics that eventually your Bucky fics are the only reason I'm smiling again. I read it every time when I get sad. Was feeling kinda bumped to see that you have to take a hiatus for a while, but then I've seen your notification and can't say that I'm not surprised.

I'm just glad that you're still on Tumblr. I hope you will be more active soon, it doesn't have to be a new fics or on going chapter though it could be just you babbling about something or reblogging stuffs it's fine as long as you're still on this platform (I'm truly sorry if it's sounds too demanding, I just like when you're posting something).

I'm just letting you know that you and your fics can bring joy to someone like me. I meant every words that I said. I'm sorry in advance if it's too long, messy, and hard to understand, or something that I said might offends you as of my lack of English (Because English is not my first language but I'm trying to write my best). You don't need to reply, I just hope you get to read this. Please keep up the great work and wishing you all the best!! ❤️

Thank you so much. It's very surprising to me still up to this day the amount of support that people give on social media aus. I thought that it would just be a passing trend, but I was proven wrong.

I'm so thankful that you guys appreciate the works that I have put out and I mean that from the bottom of my heart. I love you all so much for doing so. Everytime I'm having a bad day (which is more often that usual lately. DW im getting better!!!) I would open up my silly little works and read everyone's comments and it just makes my day 100% better.

I have been MIA for the past few months and I really thought that no one even remembered me here but seeing this just makes me want to cry. Thank you Anon, you have made my week so much better. I love you. I hope you know that. Please let me know who you are because I wanna give u a smooch.

[magniloquent-raven]

Number 73 "take mine" I'm thinking jacket sharing with Harringrove (either offering the jacket) if you have time!! 💖 💖

so. it’s not jacket sharing, i hope that’s okay!! and it’s actually a sequel to your first prompt? @bambixxblue and i were talking about a fix-it sequel where billy comes back and im weak for fix-its so i ended up with this. it’s. angsty. but also. soft? idk, i hope u like it anyway!!

basically the premise is billy and hopper were both in russia and had to break out together. posted on ao3

—-

Max turned seventeen three weeks ago. It’s hard to keep track of the days sometimes but Billy’s pretty sure he’s right. It’s hard to wrap his brain around Max being seventeen. When he pictures her in his head she’s still a bratty twelve-year-old with skinned knees who doesn’t know when to shut her mouth.

He tells Hop. Tells him about the birthdays he was there for, wonders about the ones he wasn’t. Cries a little too. Funny how easy it is to do that now. It used to be an ordeal, would burn and claw at him until he broke. He’s too exhausted for that nowadays, lets his tears fall unfettered and ignores the shame that still sneaks up on him when he does.

They have to be quiet, always afraid of being caught again. Billy’s constantly looking over his shoulder, jumping at shadows. It’s stupid to risk it, for something so trivial, but he can’t stop the words from spilling out.

“You miss her.” It’s not a question. Hop doesn’t ask that kind of shit, he just knows. Which is why Billy doesn’t respond. Doesn’t have to.

He pats Billy’s shoulder awkwardly. It’s the clumsy kind of affection a father is supposed to offer and it sets Billy off again, tears dripping down his nose and cutting streaks through the dirt smeared on his cheeks.

They’re holed up in an abandoned warehouse this time. Waiting. Always waiting. The plan is to stow away in the next cargo hold with enough space but in the meantime they’re fugitives, laying low wherever they can find empty, forgotten places.

Hop tells him about El while they wait. Billy’s heard most of his stories by now, but he listens anyway. Listens to the wobble in his voice as he talks about teaching El to read, hears the question under it all, about whether he’ll ever see her again.

Billy wishes he had an answer.

~~

The first time Billy set foot in Hawkins, Indiana, he was seventeen, angry and wanting nothing more than to be anywhere else.

It’s three days after his twenty-second birthday the second time. An icy December evening, dark and windy. He’s exhausted. He hasn’t eaten in two days. He’s a patchwork tapestry of scars that weren’t there before, a battered effigy of the person he used to be, cobbled together with scraps of what he could salvage.

Hawkins is the same unremarkable, rinky-dink town it always was. Seeing it again is a relief and a punch in the gut all at once. It’s all he’s wanted for three years, but it’s terrifying.

They end up in Loch Nora, of all places. The Byers’ old house was empty, and going too far into town is risky. 

It doesn’t feel real. Standing on Steve Harrington’s front porch, suddenly all too aware of the layer of sweat and grime on his skin. This place is too clean, too quiet. Peaceful, in a way that can’t be true.

Billy chews on his thumbnail, stands behind Hopper while he bangs on the door. There are no cars in the driveway, which means at the very least Steve’s parents won’t answer the door. But there’s no guarantee that Steve even lives here anymore.

He’s getting antsy, glancing around, heart pounding.

Then the door swings open.

Billy is seventeen, half-drunk and stinking like beer, colder than he’ll let on because fucking Indiana and its shitty weather, wiping the drool from his chin when he spots him across a room, already half in love by the time he’s clambered over a couch to get a closer look.

He blinks. He’s twenty-two, pale and shivering, thumbnail still between his teeth, and Steve Harrington’s doe eyes still make him weak in the knees.

Steve’s hair is longer, brushing his shoulders, but other than that he doesn’t look any different. Except that he isn’t looking at Billy with thinly veiled contempt or anger.

“Hey, kid.” Hopper says. “Gonna let us inside, or what?”

Steve is silent. Staring, lips parted. One hand still on the doorknob, the other slack at his side. He sways dangerously, and Billy tenses, prepared to catch him if he falls over. He doesn’t, but Billy’s still itching to touch him.

“Am I dreaming?” Steve blurts, looking dazed, unable to decide who to look at and ending up unfocused and hazy.

Yeah, it’s me, don’t cream your pants. The memory feels like someone else’s. A lifetime ago.

Billy bites down on his lip, battling an inexplicable, and slightly hysterical, urge to laugh.

“Dream about me often, Harrington?” Billy says, because apparently it takes more than nearly dying and spending three years as a fugitive to get over his inability to keep his mouth shut around pretty boys (or one in particular). Though now his voice comes out soft, quiet, betraying genuine sentiment. He’s not sure if that’s better or worse than the armor of taunts he used to cover that shit up with.

Probably worse.

Steve’s looking at him. Only him. Billy had almost forgotten how addictive that is. He watches Steve’s mouth open and close, tracks the way one corner curls up a little when he lets out a little disbelieving huff that isn’t quite a laugh. “More than you’d think,” he murmurs.

And Billy’s brain shuts off. There are a thousand questions stuck up there, but he can’t get a single one of them out because he’s too busy trying to get past, more than you’d think, echoing through his head in surround sound.

He’s startled out of his Steve-induced haze by Hopper’s pointed cough.

It seems like he’s not the only one, because Steve visibly flinches, “Right, shit,” he stammers, “Get—uh, get inside.” He ushers them in, glancing around, checking the street behind them.

The Harrington residence is one of those big fancy houses with more rooms than anyone could possibly need, but that means multiple bathrooms so Steve (as politely as possible) tells them they can both shower whenever they feel like it. And he fusses. A lot. All nervous hands clutching his elbows and teeth worrying at the inside of his cheek, eyes darting between Billy and Hopper like he’s sure they’ll vanish any second and never have been there at all.

Billy isn’t sure how to deal with it, so he avoids his eyes. Then misses looking at him.

An hour later they’re all in the kitchen. Billy keeps plucking at the sleeve of his borrowed sweatshirt, trying to keep calm. It’s too much, all at once. His skin feels raw, weird and tight. The overhead light is too bright, and the smell of Steve on everything is making him lightheaded. The soft detergent scent from his clothes, the shampoo Billy used when he showered (his hair is a lot longer than it used to be, it took forever to detangle it all).

Steve makes some calls. It’s late, too late to be calling people’s houses but he does it anyway.

Not long after, the front door bursts open.

Max is taller than he remembers. Rougher around the edges. Her hair is a choppy mess, auburn waves sticking out in every direction, curling around her ears, and there’s the sharp glimmer of silver in one lobe. She’s wearing a jean jacket with a torn elbow.

And she’s crying, messy and red-eyed, not bothering to wipe the snot from her nose.

“Where. The fuck. Have you been?” she sobs, shoulders shaking, and she practically trips forward in her hurry to throw her arms around Billy’s neck.

He opens his mouth. Closes it again. Feels unsteady, like he’ll fall to pieces if he moves wrong.

“I’m here now,” is all he can manage. She doesn’t need to hear about military hospitals and Russian prisons, about being kept in a cell, wondering if he’d ever see sunlight again… She doesn’t need that right now. Hell, he’s not ready to talk about it. Might never be.

He hugs her back, torn between wanting to squeeze as hard as he can, make sure she’s real, and being terrified of breaking her.

She still uses that shitty coconut-scented soap, and that’s what shatters him. He’s crying into her shoulder, clutching the back of her jacket. He used to dwarf her, remembers her being tiny and fragile, despite her fierceness, yet now she’s supporting his weight while he buckles.

They’ve never actually hugged before, he realizes, and that realization opens a door he wishes he could’ve left closed a little longer.

Guilt. Like undertow, pulling him back to harsh reality, cold steel gripping his heart, weighing it down. He should’ve been better. Treated her better. And now she’s here, crying like she actually missed him, and he doesn’t deserve it.

He pulls away, wiping the back of his hand across his eyes.

She’s still looking at him, hands on his shoulders, a wobbly smile on her face.

Billy is overwhelmed again. It must show, because suddenly Steve is at Max’s side, eyes gentle and his soft mouth pinched in a frown, “Max. Maybe give him some space.”

She clenches her jaw, probably physically holding back an argument, and nods, stepping back despite the reluctance written all over her face.

“I’m sorry,” Billy says, barely louder than a whisper. Then he can’t stop himself from saying it, again and again, gaze fixed on the floor, tears still dripping down his chin. He has to bite his lip hard enough to draw blood to finally stem the tide of apologies. He squeezes his eyes shut, tries to will the world away.

“Billy.” Steve’s voice is soft. He has a nice voice, so Billy focuses on it, through all the angry buzzing in his ears. “Billy, I need you to nod if you’re listening.” He doesn’t want to, he wants to curl up and fucking die, anything but be a person right now because everything hurts and there isn’t enough air in this room and— “Billy?”

He bows his head, twitches, it’s barely a nod but it’s all he’s got.

“Okay, good. Can I touch your hand?”

Billy’s heart stutters, aches. He’s having a hard time concentrating through the burn in the back of his throat, the static drowning out his thoughts. He nods again.

Steve’s fingers are gentle, pulling Billy’s hand from where it had tangled in his hair. He hadn’t noticed the fingernails digging into his scalp until Steve took one of his hands away. It ends up pressed against something warm, soft material under his fingers, moving slow—oh. His hand is on Steve’s chest.

“Can you breathe with me? Concentrate on me, okay?”

He does.

Steve’s cradling his hand. He’s got callouses along the top of his palm, barely there but present. He’s breathing deep, calm and steady. But despite his outward demeanour his heart is racing, Billy can feel it through his shirt. He curls his fingers into the sensation, fingertips digging in as far as he can push them.

Billy almost forgets to breathe he’s so fixated on Steve’s heartbeat.

It does its job either way though, because exhaustion is starting to hit him as the static recedes. He sags, relaxes. Every muscle in his body feels leaden.

He opens his eyes, squints against the sudden light.

He’s almost afraid to look up. Afraid of being judged, of triggering another episode, so fucking terrified, all the time—

“Billy?”

His fingers twitch reflexively, tightening his grip on Steve’s polo.

“You good?” His voice is still so soft, and so close it hurts.

It takes several long moments for Billy to collect himself. Then he looks up.

Max is hovering, standing behind Steve with wide eyes, her worry palpable. Hopper looks grim, but then again, he kind of always does. He’s a respectable distance away, watching. And Steve… Steve is right there still, holding Billy’s hand and looking at him like he cares, doe eyes shining, fixed on Billy’s face.

“I’m okay,” Billy says, voice rough. He sounds like hell, but they all visibly relax anyway.

The room is silent for too long after that. It feels tense in a distant way, like it would be awkward if Billy had the energy to care, was awake enough to feel anything but vaguely fuzzy. He’s still got a handful of shirt and doesn’t plan on letting go any time soon. Steve’s the only thing keeping him upright, and he hasn’t let go either.

“Did… did I do something wrong?” Max asks, her voice is small and tremulous and cuts right through Billy.

“No!” he’s quick to cut in, “No. Max. It’s…” Billy trembles, stutters to a stop. He has no idea how to explain, even to himself, let alone Max. Steve squeezes his hand. His stomach flips. “It’s not your fault.”

She doesn’t look like she believes him, but she doesn’t argue. He wishes he could make it better, but he’s got no idea how.

“We should all get some sleep,” Steve says.

And that’s that. His tone brooks no argument, even in a room full of stubborn assholes. Apparently, the past few years have given Steve time to hone his babysitting skills. Or maybe they’re all just as exhausted as Billy is.

There’s some squabbling about sleeping arrangements though.

Everyone insists Hopper take the master bedroom, Steve says his parents won’t know or care, his old friends did worse than sleep in that bed. They all poke at him until he relents and trudges off, bidding them a quiet goodnight.

Then Billy says he’ll take the couch and both Steve and Max yell at him.

Billy rolls his eyes. “It’s fine, guys,” he mutters. He’s not about to make Max sleep on the weird little couch (he’s done enough to her already) and putting Steve out in his own house would be shitty. “It’s not like I haven’t slept on worse.” He winces as he says it, realizing as the words come out of his mouth that it’s probably the wrong thing to say. It was meant as a reassurance, that he would in fact be fine with the couch, because at least it’s clean and warm, but all it does is make Max look sad and put a little wrinkle between Steve’s eyebrows.

“I’ve slept on this couch before,” Max says, a stubborn tilt to her jaw, “I’ll take it.”

Steve scoffs at that, “You complain every time you have to sleep on that couch, Max. Take the guest bed. Billy can take mine.” His fingers tense when he says it, and Billy realizes they’re still holding hands. His hand slipped from Steve’s shirt while they were bullying Hopper into taking the master suite, but Steve has yet to let go.

And… suddenly he wants nothing more than to sleep in Steve’s bed. But. “Only if you come with me,” he blurts.

Which is really not how he should have said that, but it’s out there now.

“Oh my god,” he hears Max mutter.

His whole head feels like it’s on fire. “Shit. I—I mean—”

“Okay,” Steve says hurriedly, then clears his throat, “Yeah. That. That works. Uh. Okay.” He’s glancing at Max awkwardly, nervous, but she just rolls her eyes. Billy barely notices her do it, too busy looking at Steve, his heart hammering.

“Steve, it’s okay. I’m—” It’s her turn to look uncertain, but it’s only for a second. “Me and El are dating. We’ve been trying to figure out how to tell everyone, and—yeah. Anyway. I’m not going to judge you, or whatever.”

Well, that was not at all what Billy was expecting. He takes a moment to worry about both of them, be terrified of what would happen to them if someone found out. Then he remembers that El can kill people with her brain and Max once threatened to castrate him with a spiked bat. The knot of anxiety doesn’t dissipate but he’s freaking out less.

“How long has that been going on?” Steve asks, sounding more bemused than anything.

Max turns pink, and it’s kind of fascinating to watch. She’s flustered. That’s adorable. “Since, um. Since April.”

“Happy for you, kid,” Billy says. And he means it. He barely knows El, in theory, but really. The kid’s been in his head. He could recite every story Hopper’s told him about her from memory. He died protecting her.

He knows her well enough to know she’s good for Max, and he loves Max enough to want her to have good things.

She grins, bright and real. Billy’s fairly certain he’s never seen her that happy before, and his heart clenches.

“I’m not sure who I’m supposed to give the shovel talk to here,” Steve says, more to himself than anything.

Billy snickers, and tugs on Steve’s hand, “Like you could take either of them.”

Steve steps closer, looking faux-offended, “I’ll have you know I won a fight once.”

“Yeah, three years ago. You’re a has-been, Harrington,” Max chimes in.

“Isn’t it past your bedtime?”

“I’m seventeen, dingus.”

“You’ve been spending too much time with Robin.”

He missed them so much. Missed something he, if he’s being honest with himself, never really had in the first place. They both hated his guts before, and he… he was a mess. Still is. Just a different kind now. But being here, being part of this, is something he always on some level wanted and…

“Oh my god, Billy, are you okay?” Max asks, concern bleeding into her voice.

He’s crying again, smiles through the tears. “Yeah. Yeah I am.”

[mccnyoongi]

That Namjoon drabble was so good! Soft sappy smut is underrated!! 😭 Do you think I could request one with dry humping and a sweet, flustered, dirty talking Jungkook?? Thank you!

another drabble to prove my love of a) sappy shit and b) college aus (although deff not as soft as some of my other stuff OH WELL)

⇢ word count: 1.3 K+ (sjkfksd WHOOPS)

⇢ warnings: longhaired eboy!jungkook and im NOT SORRY, boyfriend!jk, college!au, sappy soft smut, no actual sex, semi-public bc reader and jungkook are insatiable, groping at a party, not proof-read at all.

Jeon Jungkook makes you thankful for a lot of weird things. Like the wrinkly old bat that is your Intro to Philosophy professor, for pairing the two of you together on a boring project in your first semester. Or the cursed university frat party jungle juice, for giving you the confidence to tell the boy you’d only just started to see as one of your closest friends that you’d simply love to suck his dick if he would ever be interested. Or the local laundromat, the one with the burnt out ‘A’ in the neon sign out front so it’d spell out ‘LUNDRY’ at night, for being the place where you and Jungkook shared your very first, giggly kiss, with his Power Ranger boxers you had teased him for not ten minutes earlier on tumble dry behind you.

Six months later you realize you are simply grateful for Jeon Jungkook, the smarmy, bratty, crooked grin wearing bastard. Especially at moments like this, when an obnoxious party is raging on all around you, but all his focus is on you, the girl perched in his lap, the one who won’t let him cut his hair because she likes running her hands through the curly locks way too much. He has a way of making you feel so important it’d be a wonder if you weren’t completely smitten with him.

“Are you all partied out already?” You’d asked him when he’d dragged you onto his lap, making you straddle him on a worn out beige couch, barely an hour into Hoseok’s birthday party, no one occupying the other spot. His arms are strewn out on the back of the couch behind him, making him looking cocky and smug.

He shakes his head, a sly smile gracing lips you know all too well. “Nah,” his pink tongue swipes over his lips teasingly, and you suddenly know he has some sort of plan up his sleeve. Your boyfriend is the scheming type, far too used to getting his way, especially when it comes to you. “Just missed you.”

Missed you? You scoff. You had spent the previous night at his place, woke up there, ate together, got ready there and showed up to this party together. Sure, you had lost each other to your respective friends not two minutes after walking through the door, but an hour is barely enough time to miss someone. “Needy…” You tease with a roll of your eyes.

His hands leave their spot of the couch to find a tight grip on your hips, one that has your memory reeling with times of similar tight grips and the same glint that Jungkook has in his eyes right now.

“I’m the needy one now, am I?” He cocks his head and pouts, the act entirely endearing and contrasted with the bruising grip he has on your hips and his thighs sinfully flexing underneath you. “C’mon, baby, you know you can’t resist me,” His confidence has you rolling your eyes once more. “And I can’t resist you. We’re insatiable for each other and it’s fucking adorable.”

His grip loosens, thumbs rubbing calming circles on your sides. You contemplate his words and how true they are- in the past six months the two of you had been together, you had become the couple you might have once grumbled and complained about. Unable to keep away from each other, never caring who else is around because your need for the other is all consuming.

Jungkook proves his point as he presses his lips to yours, the taste of that local IPA he likes so much on his lips, and you can’t help yourself as you eagerly kiss him back. You can feel him smile against your lips, as if he won some kind of game you weren’t even playing.

You almost pull back to reprimand him, to tease him, something, but you don’t even remember why when one of his hands sneaks to your ass to grip and pull you against him. Any ideas of stopping him vanish when you brush against his bulge, already half hard, despite being in a crowded living room. Of fucking course he is. 

You gasp when he properly grinds you against him and he only riles you up further as he licks into your mouth, his skilled tongue running over your own. You reciprocate as best you can, surprised and dazed by the sudden onslaught of affection.

He pulls back and you think he might be done, that he had a sudden moment where he lost control, and that you’d both go back to partying like stereotypical college kids. Really, you should have known better.

Jungkook doesn’t bother to pull back at all, or remove his hands from their suggestive positions. Instead he’s ducked his head into your neck, a favourite spot of his, to kiss, suck and nibble up and down the expanse of it. 

You hold back a whimper at a particularly sharp nip just under your jaw and he grins wickedly. He finally pulls away, giving you a moment to breathe and the chance to meet his devilish gaze. The boy never falters, despite the admittedly half-hearted glare you throw at him, instead leaning into your ear, teeth grabbing onto the lobe and dragging against it before whispering into it, sending shivers from there down to the large hand on your ass.

“I know you like this, hon, bet you’re fucking soaked, you love it” He’s pulling you against him again, both hands now on your posterior. And you’d hate to admit that he’s right, so you don’t, instead throwing your hands around him and leaning your head against his shoulder, sighing and biting back wanton, desperate sounds every time your center reaches his rapidly hardening cock. “Yeah, that’s right, ‘s just you and me.”

And he’s right, because it doesn’t matter who else is there. It doesn’t matter that you’re supposed to be celebrating one of your best friend’s birthdays, or that Seokjin and Taehyung are across the room, pointing and making lewd jokes about the two of you that you’ll be sure to hear before the night is through. All that matters is Jungkook. 

You’re moving of your own volition now, his grip slack, but your hips still moving so that you’re continuously grinding against his dick, now getting harder by the second. And you know he loves it too. Because he loves you.

“Good girl, that’s it,” He eggs you on and his own hips buck up, chasing pleasure, as desperate for you as you are for him. “Love you so much, my best girl, huh? Grinding against me around all these fuckin’ people, don’t even care who’s watching. I don’t care either, hun, you know why?” 

Experience with Jungkook makes you know that he’s expecting an answer, but you don’t trust your voice, so instead, you shake your head against his neck. He chuckles, the sound rumbling through his chest, making you feel it more than hear it. “Cause they all know you’re mine. All mine,” You nod, though he hasn’t asked a question because you know it’s true undeniable, even. “And I’m yours, huh?”

“Mine-” It’s the first word you’ve spoken since Jungkook first kissed you and the confirmation makes him sigh happily, even though it’s something he already knew. Turns out you both have a praise kink a mile wide.

“Time to get up, doll,” He stops your hips from moving against him, and now you can’t stop the whine that escapes your mouth. You lift your head to pout at your boyfriend, lip properly jutted out and eyes wide. Jungkook coos at you, his hands now cupping both cheeks, dwarfing you in size. 

“I know, hun, I know. But I don’t think any of these assholes would appreciate if we took this any further. We gotta find somewhere more private before I’m forced to fuck you on this couch that I know for a fact Hobi has jerked off on before. So we’d better find an empty bathroom because I don’t think I can make it through the walk back home.”

[firestarterrr]

do all the questions cuz im both nosy and a shit

😂😂😂 You are a shit, that took forever, but it gave me something to do so cheers 😂👍

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? I dooo, we're not like best mates, but we don't argue much..

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? My son Brodi, I tell him at least 20 times a day 😂😬🤷🏻‍♀️ he probably gets fed up with me tbh 😂

03: Do you regret anything? Absolutely not, wouldnt be where I am now if things happened differently..

04: Are you insecure? Yes 🙃

05: What is your relationship status? I'm in a relationship 😬☺️

06: How do you want to die? I've always said I want to be eaten by sharks cause it'd be pretty sick 😂🦈 and the shark would get a tasty snack 😬

07: What did you last eat? A ham and cheese salad pitta with lots of onion and mayo, I'm obsessed with them, reyt good 🐷

08: Played any sports? Not since primary school when I played netball 😂😂😂 I'm not a sporty person 🤷🏻‍♀️

09: Do you bite your nails? Alllll the bloody time 😩

10: When was your last physical fight? I've never been in an actual fight.. Play fight all the time though.. And loose all the time too 🙃

11: Do you like someone? Meh, my boyfriends alright I guess 😏😏

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? Probably not quite 48 hours but I was awake for what felt like forever when I went to Leeds fest

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? Don't think so.. I let go of shit easy, so if you piss me off I'll l be mad for a while and then get over it and be fine.

14: Do you miss someone? Yup, Jamie's at work and babs asleep 😔 and my gran and grandpa 💙

15: Have any pets? A hedgehog called meeko, he's a grumpy little shit 🦔

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? Pretty wank to be fair 😬🙃

17: Ever made out in the bathroom? I have..

18: Are you scared of spiders? Nah I like them, unless one crawls on me without me knowing, I'll probably just jump, can't stand it when people kill them 😒

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? To see my grand parents, aye definitely

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? Fucking hate that word 😩😩

21: What are your plans for this weekend? I'm starting a new job and I'm not looking forward to it cause I've got to be there for 7 and I like my sleep 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

22: Do you want to have kids? How many? I've always wanted 2 but after having Brodi, I wouldn't say no to more, it's the best thing ever.. I just know I won't be allowed any more than 2😂

23: Do you have piercings? Two in each lobe, tragus, top of ear, septum, belly, tongue and nipples but I had to take them out for breastfeeding 😬

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? Probably art.. I used to absolutely hate school so I never liked any lessons, I didn't have many friends and we were never in the same class, so I'd just sit on my own and just count down the minutes till hometime 🙃

25: Do you miss anyone from your past? Yeah loads of people, but you just drift apart from friends sometimes 🤷🏻‍♀️

26: What are you craving right now? 🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? I think so.. I felt awful but it just wasn't working 😔

28: Have you ever been cheated on? Yup

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? Yeah

30: What’s irritating you right now? Where do I start?!?

31: Does somebody love you? Yeah, I'm pretty sure they do 🙄

32: What is your favourite color? I can't pick favourites 😩 I like yellow, orange, red, black and blue though 😬

33: Do you have trust issues? Does anyone not have trust issues?

34: Who/what was your last dream about? Ahh, I have no idea, I always have the weirdest dreams though

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? Jamie 😂

36: Do you give out second chances too easily? Yessss, I don't know if that's a good or a bad thing..

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? Easier to forgive and move on there's no point holding grudges on people, waste of time 🤷🏻‍♀️

38: Is this year the best year of your life? I wouldn't say the best with everything that's going on, but it's not the worst..

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? Probably about 16..

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? Nope

51: Favourite food? I love most food 😂 Chinese, crisps, donuts, vegetables, cheese, garlic, pasta, mash potato.. 😬🐷

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? Yessss

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? Kissed Jamie and told him I love him

54: Is cheating ever okay? Nope, but I can understand it in certain situations..

55: Are you mean? I don't think so 🥺

56: How many people have you fist fought? None

57: Do you believe in true love? I dooo

58: Favourite weather? Chilly and breezy but warm sun 😬

59: Do you like the snow? I loveeee the snow ⛄⛄⛄⛄⛄

60: Do you wanna get married? Yesss, I can't wait for it, Jamie's hasn't got the hint yet 🙄😂

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? Nope, I hate it so much 😂 bab on the other hand..

62: What makes you happy? My family/friends, food, hugs, hearing Brodi laugh, aniamls, music, reassurance, being in bed..

63: Would you change your name? Nah, when I was younger I hated my name but now I love it

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? No, I'll just wait until he's finished work..

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 🤷🏻‍♀️ Say I'm sorry but I don't feel the same

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? Jamie.. Sometimes I feel bad cause I can be reyt weird 😂 but so can he so its all good

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? Erm.. My boss 😒

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? Jamie not long ago

69: Do you believe in soul mates? I doo

70: Is there anyone you would die for? Of course, Brodi, Jamie, mum, dad and sister and a few friends 😂

I wonder if anyone actually reads all this.. 🤔

#aboutme #ask

[somebodyhelpthenotdeadfreds]

So. *cracks knuckes* I hear you have an au idea for Gary Green. Could you maybe talk about it a bit more? *crosses fingers* (im terrible im sorry)

 *crackles knuckles* settle down around the fire, I’ll spin a half-formed tale that is slowly growing into a real fic. Inspiration comes from my lovely Discord server and @agentmarymargaretskitz who encourages all my cracky AUs.

So John, Ava, and Gary are out on a mission for the Legends. This is after the whole ‘good and evil’ talk (sidenote: forever bitter that that was not an ONSCREEN conversation but i digress) so the tension between the two is a real ‘will they/won’t they’ mixed with the sexual tension as always. Ava doesn’t want to be here, but somebody needs to be a responsible adult.

Eventually, after *insert bullshit magic yadadada* Gary turns a corner and BAM.

“Gary, what happened?” Ava yells after hearing him yelp.“I - think I ran into a wall,” Gary calls back, rubbing his forehead, touching over his temples because damn, that’s what the pain feels like but - there’s no wall. There’s nothing. It just feels like a migraine.

He goes home that night and the headache has spread to a neck and back ache, as well. Oh well, probably pulled a muscle, it’ll be fine.

For some reason, he eats five eggs (scrambled a little raw) for breakfast and the ache is dull, humming under his skin. His mouth actually waters as Mona passes by his work desk with food for the creatures, he’s - starving.

Nate doesn’t question his eating of an entire can of chicken liver pate, plain, at his desk.

The headache’s back, and it’s worse.

It’s soothed slightly by a rare steak he makes at home, but now it feels like he’s buzzing with energy as he lays drained on the couch.

“I - think I have an iron deficiency,” he murmurs to nobody, as per usual.

There’s a purr from the back of his brain: No.

It’s all he remembers before falling asleep.

For the next three days, he’s basically been eating nothing but protein yet he’s never felt more tired in his life. Nobody says a thing to him.“Sorry Green, got the last 8 O’Clock,” McNeil laughs at him, the treacherous Keriug already filling up his cup. Gary rolls his eyes, but he finds he can’t roll them back forward again as words escape his mouth“You touch my coffee again, I’ll rip your lungs out and feed them to you.”

His eyes suddenly roll forward again and he blinks a few times before giving a high, awkward laugh. at McNeil’s startled expression. 

“You - you know me, not the same without morning coffee!” He takes whatever’s in the communal pot and sits back down at his desk, shaking his head and blinking a few more times. He gets through until lunch until he - suddenly blacks out.

He wakes up again in the afternoon, in the empty bathroom on the -3rd floor that nobody ever uses, covered in blood. That’s enough to make him panic, never mind the three empty pint containers of blood, a fourth in his hand and all over his mouth.

He stumbles out of the stall and washes his face in the sink, and when he looks up his reflection is smirking with coal-black eyes. He rubs his eyes and turns away, that purring voice pressing behind his temple. 

Hello.

“Uh, hi. What - who are you?” he asks, because damn his ingrained politeness.A friend.“I - I don't believe that.”Gary. All I want to do is help you.“...could you - not, do that,” Gary muttered, cleaning the messy stall.It’s taken longer to gain any control over you than normal humans.“...sorry?”Pure souls are hard to break.“I’m - not - a virgin, if that’s what you mean.”Oh, I know. You think about it a lot.“Don’t - don’t read my thoughts!”Too late. You’re tired, let me - drive. Close your eyes, let me-“No! Shut up!” Gary says too loudly out loud as he walks into the break room. He grabs a danish and scurries back out of there to avoid confrontation.

And instead of that, he walks right into John Constantine, looking ruggedly handsome (like always dammit Gary shut up) while he’s got crumbs all over his lips and dark circles under his eyes.“Hey, Squire,” John smirks with a cigarette between his lips even if the building’s nonsmoking. Gary opens his mouth to respond back when that awful migraine, like claws sinking into his frontal lobe, returns and he winces.“Sorry, migraines,” he explains in a rush, heading back to his desk without another look his way.

It’s too much to deal with, he opens the door to Ava’s office, knowing he looks like a wreak and she’s - so annoyed to see him, it’s so obvious, and he tries to explain, Ava, Boss-Lady, I’m - I’m sick, I’m sick, something’s wrong - “something’s wr-”“Gary, just go home,” Ava says curtly, going back to her meeting with the Legends. He lets the door close and heads on the walk home alone, only his feet carry him somewhere else.

When he’s finally back in his apartment, eating through two packages of raw lamb, the voice comes back.They’re mean to you.“I - they’re my friends, I was - I was being annoying.”Friends shouldn’t do that.“You - what do you know about friends? Where - where are you from?”Hell.“Okay. Okay, that’s normal. Why - why are you inside of me? Oh, no, that came out wrong.”Reasons you can’t know, not yet.“...cool. Look - look, don’t bother possessing me. Look at me, I’m worthless. I trip over my own carpet four times a week sober.”I...can help.“I don’t want to hurt anyone.”People deserve it.“I don’t need to hurt them, though.”Humans are dumb, Gary. All of them. You, not so much.

It’s weird, to have this conversation with essentially your own brain as you speak out loud and then have words and voice that aren’t yours come out of your mouth.

Give me a chance to take control. I’ll give you what you want, then you can let me what what I want, the demon says. (Gary’s calling him Joe, because his vocal chords cannot replicate the name that swirled in his brain)

“...you get one day to convince me,” Gary states firmly, and no sooner do those words leave his lips then his vision goes black.

When he wakes up, it’s to everything he’s ever wanted in the world. The A/C’s never on the fritz, the neighbors are quiet, the shower always has hot water, the apartment’s bigger, and there’s - a blonde warlock in his bed that kisses him before Gary has to leave for work.

He has his OWN office at work, his own Keriug, he’s employee of the month and number one agent, all the bells and whistles and everyone is actually glad to see him and greet him, even Ava, even all the Legends. Everything is so goddamn perfect, especially a visit from said blonde warlock in the afternoon, in his lap in his own office, smiling that rare real smile.

And then John Constantine says to him, Gary Green: “I love you.”

Gary sits straight up from where’s he’s been out cold on his couch, gasping for air and he doesn’t know why, he just knows his heart is racing because - 

What’s wrong? It’s what you want.“It’s not,” Gary whispers, lying but not lying, picking up his phone. “I don’t want lies. I don’t want to be lied to.”

It’s 6 o’clock. He’s been MIA an entire day and a half. There’s a single message, from Ava, at two in the afternoon: Gary, why aren’t you at work? You need to call if you can’t come in, remember.

That’s it. Nothing about his well-being, his whereabouts, about him.

Gary throws his phone into the opposite armchair and cries into a stupid throw pillow he got as a stupid giveaway at an office supply store. Not even a housewarming pillow.

There’s a hesitant warmth, just under the degree of burning, under the skin of his aching shoulder, spreading down his back.I want to help.

“How?”Whatever you need.

The knock at the door and the British accented “Gary, love, you awake?” sends Gary scrambling to shove bloody wrappers under the couch, quickly rinsing his face off before answering the door even as the voice hisses Noooot Constantine. “Hush,” Gary whispers harshly before throwing the door open.

John takes in Gary’s red-tinged eyes, dark circles beneath those, the general paleness and exhaustion. “Weren’t around today.”

“Sick,” Gary offers quickly. “Think - I have a bug. I’m fine, don’t - your’e not worried, duh, just - thanks, thank you for - checking in.”

There’s something - wrong, John can’t put a finger on it, but just nods in agreement. There’s too long a pause before the goodbyes, enough time for an embrace or a kiss, but neither offers either option. The door just closes between them afterwards.

I said humans were dumb, Gary.“Not - not all humans.”You aren’t. John Constantine, of all the humans, is the dumbest.“Hey, no, don’t say that stuff.”Yes, because you want to fuck-“Do - NO, that’s not why-”I can read your thoughts. Humans usually don’t break out of those fantasies like what I put you in. Why did you?“...it’s not real.”The warmth wraps around his arm, if that were possible. This is.Gary actually smiled. “...yeah, it is.”

Apparently, it’s easy to get used to possession, so long as your demon stays well-fed. Bloodlust can be avoided as long as there is actual blood to consume. Gary knows this butchery too well by the end of the first two weeks.

We should kill him, the demon tells Gary when McNeil steals the last K-cup again.“No, I said we wouldn’t do that....unless we had a reason.” Truth be told, he’s probably on borrowed time before he finally kills, he knows that. So far, the blood’s working to keep him satisfied.You hate him. That’s a reason. Or the man downstairs for being loud. We can rip his lungs out.“Not gonna happen.”

Ava’s in a very important business meeting with Mr. Heywood, and Gary’s leading the Legends to the waiting room outside her office to wait it out.

“So what’s this about?” Sara asks him.“Boss lady won’t let me say, you know that.”“Mick.”Oh god, Gary thinks before his vision tints into black tones.Before Mick can grab Gary, all he sees are Gary’s eyes visibly turning solid black for a brief moment before he has one hand in Mick’s collar and holding him up against the wall and snarling, “I said to WAIT.”

Then he shifts back and looks terrified for a second, dropping Mick down and offering sheepishly with a laugh, “I - sorry, no coffee. Did I mention I’ve been working out? Gotta run!”

He’s out of there, “What was that?”He was bothering you.“How did I do that?”I did it.

Then Gary’s flicking his hand to the right and McNeil’s chair spins out of control and he falls out of it onto the linoleum, precious coffee spilling everywhere.

Gary smiles despite himself. “We can’t do this a lot.”But we can do it?“...we can do it sometimes.”

For more, stay tuned for the upcoming fic!!!! Whew, I hope you like this NOVELLA that I answered you with!

[dibidibidismol]

do em all, coward

on the one hand: yay! i get to do the ask game! on the other; @acutest-angle, i’m so sorry for doing this to you. i aint gonna fill nobody’s dash, so the qna is under the break. these are like really undetailed. ill be more specific for individual numbers

1: How tall or short do you wish you were? im pretty happy being 163

2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not) i love my lil baby so much. i wouldnt trade my pupper for the world

3: Do you have a favorite clothing style? i wear a lot of black, and generally dress such that i would be good to go for any job interviews/public speaking events. this is in large part to make up for the fact that my go-to shoes are heelys. like i wear my heelys during professional presentations that count for a large part of my grade. my teachers think im “something else”

4: What was your favorite video game growing up? idk. we didnt do all that media shiz. maybe pvz.

5: What three things/people do you think of most each day: my doggo, my child(useless friend needing guidance) and my tumblr-famous friend. hmu for her url. 6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say?absolute weirdo, but like in a socially acceptable way. can and will debate you into submission.7: What is your opinion on [insert person/thing here]?i support gays.8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic] 

9: Are you ticklish?a bit10: Are you allergic to anything?some cats, all homophobes11: What’s your sexuality?ace, homoromo12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa?tea babe. like i have so much. like a cubic yard. its a problem.13: Are you a cat or dog person?im multifandom(not a furry)14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson?elf15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber?amber liu16: How tall are you?160cm17: If you had to change your name, what would you change it to?my chinese name18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]102-105 i’m smol.19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits?normally no. when im home alone….a lil.20: Do you like space or the ocean more? i have a large fear of the ocean. 21: Are you religious? no22: Pet peeves?poor work ethics/mansplaining/poor hygiene.23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]?diurnal24: Favorite constellation?orions belt25: Favorite star?shinee26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls?not particularly27: Any phobias or fears?germs, the dark, men, large non-pools bodies of water, spiders28: Do you think global warming is real? yea, but “climate change” is more accurate29: Do you believe in reincarnation?no30: Favorite movie?tangled, the lorax, shawshank redemp. , hairspray, legally blond, mulan, mama mia, in that order.31: Do you get scared easily? yea32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime?3 fish 3 dog33: Blog rate? [You’ll rate the blog of the one who’s asking.] im gunna rate @acutest-angle cuz she did mine. 10/10 would be 11 but she aint stannin shinee.34: What is a color that calms you? purple35: Where would you like to travel and/or live? oregon suits me fine36: Where were you born? oregon37: What is your eye color?brown38: Introvert or extrovert?idek. im really good at people, but idk abt energy gaining or wtv.39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs?no40: Hugs or kisses?hugs41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now?my doggo.42: Who is someone you love deeply? see above43: Any piercings you want? i already have doubles. might get belly button in the future.44: Do you like tattoos and piercings? hnngg45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so? hell no. i take drugs/alcohol v seriously.46: Talk about your crush, if you have one! gorl. so beautiful, so smart, so utterly perfect. also taken.47: What is a sound you really hate? the whit boi in class mansplaining shit to me.48: A sound you really love? pitter pat of paws on hardwood.49: Can you do a backflip? no.50: Can you do the splits? no51: Favorite actor and/or actress?idkrn52: Favorite movie? see 3053: How are you feeling right now?tee hee54: What color would you like your hair to be right now? i really like my hair as is.55: When did you feel happiest? talking in front of many peeps.56: Something that calms you down?tea57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]  none diagnosed. ask me about my brain later for more deets. 58: What does your URL mean?that i smol and i luv shinee59: What three words describe you the most? witty, caring,quick.60: Do you believe in evolution?yes61: What makes you unfollow a blog?too many posts/mediocre content/no longer aligned interests.62: What makes you follow a blog? posts63: Favorite kind of person:girl64: Favorite animal(s):dogs/cats65: Name three of your favorite blogs. @lolfunnykpop @acutest-angle @27-umbrellas66: Favorite emoticon: thumbs up67: Favorite meme: ive connected the dots68: What is your MBTI personality type?pic69: What is your star sign?my wut?70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog?yes71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most?its black, its formalish, its a pushup bra, dress, and heelys.72: Post a selfie or two?i like dont have any, and im in no statye to be taking them rn.

73: Do you have platform shoes?no?

74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself?i forgot a wholeass language75: Can you do a front flip?no76: Do you like birds?y77: Do you like to swim?ew78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you?no79: Something you wish didn’t exist:homophobia80: Some thing you wish did exist:universal translators81: Piercings you have?double in each ear82: Something you really enjoy doing:read83: Favorite person to talk to:dog84: What was your first impression of Tumblr?no rules here.85: How many followers do you have?all together, a thousand or two?86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes? idk87: Do your socks always match?no88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely?ill cry89: What are your birthstones? the lite blu one90: If you were an animal, which one would you be?i aint no furry.91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be?a rose92: A store you hate? chick fil a93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day?  i got addicted, so ive been coffee free for 3 yrs now94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds? fly95: Do you like to wear camo? no96: Winter or summer?winter97: How long can you hold your breath for?40sec98: Least favorite person?trump99: Someone you look up to:amber liu100: A store you love?office depot101: Favorite type of shoes? heelys102: Where do you live? oregon103: Are you a vegetarian or vegan? If so, why?vegetarian, environment/animal right, eggs for health.104: What is your favorite mineral or gem? sparkle105: Do you drink milk? yea, calcium.106: Do you like bugs?i respect their existence but stay tf away107: Do you like spiders? no108: Something you get paranoid about?spiders, water, germs109: Can you draw: sure110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked?do you shave ur vag?111: A question you hate being asked?whos ur boy friend?112: Ever been bitten by a spider?no113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach?yea, from a distance114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days?sunny, from a distance115: Someone you’d like to kiss or cuddle right now: doggo116: Favorite cloud type:cotton candy?117: What color do you wish the sky was?this is fine118: Do you have freckles? like two.119: Favorite thing about a person:personality120: Fruits or vegetables?fruit121: Something you want to do right now:crochet122: Is the ocean or sky prettier?sky123: Sweet or sour foods?sweet124: Bright or dim lights?dim, i have oddball vision issues.125: Do you believe in a certain magical creature?love126: Something you hate about Tumblr:no dates on anything/ALL THE FREAKING PORNBOTS THAT ARE STILL FOLLOWING ME REGULARLY127: Something you love about Tumblr:shitposts128: What do you think about the least?i feel like this is a paradox129: What would you want written on your tombstone?list of my achievements in life(born:xxxx died:xxxx)130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now?ice131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself?how my brain occasionally forgets to filter132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures?sometimes133: Computer or TV?computer134: Do you like roller coasters?ew, all that sweat and vomit baked into the seats.135: Do you get motion sickness or seasickness?no136: Are your ears lobed or attached?lobed137: Do you believe in karma?idk, i like to be nice but secretly with passive aggressive motives.138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are?7139: What nicknames do you have/have had?dictionary, lee, tumblr girl, dibi, mom, my child, heely girl (i have a reputation at school)140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends?yea, i dont remember them, but apparently i invented myself a butler.141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink?way back in the day142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others?good143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help?giving144: What makes you angryamerica145: How many languages do you speak fluently? 1146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries? girls147: Are you androgynous? no148: Favorite physical thing about yourself: figure/hair149: Favorite thing about your personality:   i think im funny150: Name three people you would like to talk to right now in person. my friend’s mom/my coach, my rolemodel/friend, my past self.151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose? all the eras sucked for people like myself152: Do you like BuzzFeed?love/hate153: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/partner? [If you have one.]sexy free and single154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons? o yeah155: Do you like to play with others’ hair?yessss156: What embarrasses you?my mouth157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious:the internment camps158: Biggest lie you have ever told:so many159: How many people are you following?153160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)?10000+161: How many drafts do you have on your blog(s)?1000+162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)?how do i find this?163: Last time you cried and why: today. latest superstore episode.164: Do you have long or short hair?long165: Longest your hair has ever been:2.5 ft166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religon?like the community it provides, dislike a lot of values taught, dislike the exclusivity, dislike the way religion is treated as a default. 167: Do you really care how the universe and world was created? only in regards to what we can do to save it.168: Do you like to wear makeup?i like sparkly eyeshadow n mascara. but dont wear regularly.169: Can you stand on your hands or head for more than thirty seconds? no170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully? yea sure.

[dazzlingfantasiesblogs]

Hurricane P31

Happy x Reader

Warning/Triggers: 18+ Only! If under 18, kindly un-follow me!. Violence. SMUT..

Notes: o_o

Tags: @moodygrip @trippinjenni @jenny885

Pics and gifs are not mine. 

Next morning you got up and headed to Cara Cara to talk to Luann and explain you just couldn’t work from their office. Lorenzo stayed by your side just in case you needed him. Both of you drinking ice coffee since you stopped and talked to Craig. Opening the door to the Jeep, you stepped out. Lorenzo made his way to your side. You took a step back seeing his motorcycle.. you shook off the pain and sorrow. You needed to attend to your work. Lorenzo slid his hand on the small of your back smiling down at you. “It will be ok darlin.” Nodding you grabbed the handle to Cara Cara and stepped in. The same smell of cheap perfume and sex filled your nostrils making you slightly nauseous. Man you hated this place. You looked at Lorenzo, he looked around with utter disgust on his face. He had no issues with porn, but just the sheer fact you worked in this place upset him. He knew why this caused you such pain.

You walked down the main corridor to see a lot of SOA in the main relaxing room. Lorenzo tightened his grip till he seen Kozik. He relaxed a bit knowing he would never let anything go on. You walked up to your brother, hugging him tightly. “Morning sis.” “Morning.” You handed him some of your coffee to drink. You went to grab it and he pulled away. “Mine now!” he smirked. “Fine, fine.” Lorenzo laughed a bit handing you his to drink. Jax walked in seeing you standing there. He seen Lorenzo in a nice clean-cut suite and was slightly impressed by his calm presence. Jax stuck out his hand to Lorenzo. “So you’re the guy Happy wants to kill.” Lorenzo smirked a bit. “We have met before Jax. And yes, I suppose. He won’t get passed her though.” He smiled down at you. You chuckled a bit hugging Jax. “We won’t kill him, can’t. He is SOA. God above knows we don’t want to be on your bad side.” You laughed a bit at him. “Need to talk to Luann, where she at?” “She is in a meeting right now. Your help has made Cara Cara a lot of money.” “Well, I won’t be working from here anymore.” Jax squinted a bit. “I will be doing it remotely. If I need anything, I will ask a friend of mine.” “Your leaving?” “Not exactly. I am done putting myself in positions where I might commit murder.” Chuckling he nodded. “Fair.” “Haha yeah no kidding!” you looked back to see Luann and Happy walking out of the office. “Thanks for your help Happy, Otto will love the tattoo!” he nodded to her. “Luann, can I talk to you?” she looked up seeing you there. “Oh my gosh! Hi beautiful! Of course!. Who is this handsome lad?” she looked Lorenzo up and down. “Someone close to my heart.” You smiled to her. “Ok, sure come to my office.” Happy was stopped in his tracks. The fact you where here astounded him. You where always strong in his eyes. He looked to see Lorenzo close to you, almost protecting you. One thing he could read was auras and it was shielding you from him. Walking passed Happy you ignored his whole presence. Like you two where never a thing. Walking into the office you sat down.

After talking with Luann she understood everything that you where saying. She agreed to have offsite meeting at least once a week. Walking out you all where laughing at something she said. You smelt the same fake perfume as you walked out. You seen Ima flirting with Happy and Jax. She looked over to you and then Lorenzo. She stride over “I wouldn’t..” Jax spoke, warning her. “Your playing with fire..” he mumbled. She stood in front of Lorenzo as he tried to walk away from her. “Well who are handsome!” he looked at her with pure pity and then disgust. “Ugh, you are gross.” He walked around her, she grabbed his wrist. You reached out grabbing her wrist before she could touch him. “You can have Happy and SOA. Touch him, I’ll kill you.” She rolled her eyes. “Sorry Luann..” speaking, you grabbed her wrist twisting it back till you hurd a crack. She howled in pain. She hit you, scratching your cheek. You smirked a bit shoving her back against the ground. Turning around you walked passed Happy “Y/N..” He went to grab you and Lorenzo grabbed your hand before he could. “Stay away from her!” he growled at Happy. Rarely did you hear him get so upset. Kozik ran over between the two. “Enough.” Was all he said. “I agree with Kozik. We are done Happy. That is final. Do your own thing, but leave me and him the fuck alone. What we had, is gone.” You nodded to him, seriousness covered your face. Grabbing Lorenzo’s hand, you dragged him out of Cara Cara.

“Holy shit, I think you broke her wrist.” You laughed a bit. “No, I dislocated it.” He nodded, his eyes burning into your head. “Why are you staring at me like that?” he bit his lip slightly. The sheer image causing you to let a moan escape your lips. Pulling up to your house, you stepped out, Lorenzo hot on your heels. Opening the door, he shut and locked the door pulling on the blinds to close. He picked you up, bringing you to the couch, spreading your legs he kissed your passionately. His lips intertwining with yours in the most delicious of ways. His hands slid over your body, hiking up your dress over your hips. He slid his hands to your panties, pressing them against your core. “Baby..” he slid his lips over your neck and down your chest. He stood up, pulling your dress completely off. “Stunning… so beautiful…” he slid his lips over your cleavage. Sucking on your skin he created small marks to your breasts, lapping both nipples in his mouth, taking his turns with both. You were so precious. To him you reeked beauty both physically and internally. “Lorenzo..” you moaned out. He slid his fingers passed your laced panties and started to rub your clit. Closing your eyes you whole body shook with pleasure. He touched with you such care, making sure you felt everything. “Mmm..” he kissed down you stomach and sides. His head between your thighs. 

You swore you where going to explode right there. He tugged your panties lower down on your legs. He kissed your hips licking them faintly, swirling circles. He slid his tongue to your bundle, moaning at the taste. Your hands traveled to his hair, pulling slightly. Growling he wrapped his hands around your legs, pulling you as close as possible to him. Your body was lit on fire from how good his tongue felt. You couldn’t stop from moaning loudly, chanting his name over and over. He was bringing you to your peak very quickly. Your legs started to shake, you begged him not to stop. He didn’t, he helped you fall over that edge. Your vision went blurry as you arched your back. Your breathing was off a bit as you came down from the high. Lorenzo stood up, his chin wet and his lips shiny from you. He pulled off his tie and then proceeded with the rest of his suite. He picked you up, bringing you to the loft and laid you on the bed. “I don’t want this to ruin our friendship..” he choked out slightly worried. “Has it ever?” he laughed a bit nodding no. Sliding off his black Calvin Klein boxers, you seen how hard he was. He licked up and down your neck, going to suck on your ear lobe. “You have no clue how bad I have wanted you…” you smiled up and him as he slid between your legs. You felt him push into you. Crying out he kissed your lips. He was very well endowed, and it took awhile to get use to it. He slowly pushed in, groaning at the wonderful feeling. He waited till you nodded it was ok for him to move. As he slowly pulled out and pushed back in you felt yourself falling for Lorenzo all over again. He was a very attentive lover and you remembered that when you two where younger. He always said he wanted to give you the world, even as just friends. “So wet baby…” he groaned as his lips sealed against yours.

He licked down your neck to your breasts and began to suck and play with your nipples. His saliva coating both of them, the cold air sending a tingly feeling to the rest of your body. His eyes were like pools of sex, such a beautiful blue, that where mostly black with lust at the moment. “Please… faster..” He smirked pulling out and pushing in a bit harder causing you to scream out in bliss. His hips snapped against yours as he kept filling you completely. “Im… gunna..” before you could finish your sentence, you came hard. More so for a long time. Your held on to Lorenzo for dear life. Your hands wrapped around his strong arms. “Fuck.. me too..” he groaned moving harder. Pulling out he came on your hips, rolling over exhausted. “Sorry… forgot to ask If you wanted me to you know.. in you or not..” you chuckled a bit. “I am on the pill so I get it if you ask.” He quickly stood up, going downstairs grabbing you a washcloth. He came up, wiping up your body. Kissing your lips gently.

Happy sat at Cara Cara with the boys. He stared at the ground, trying to control his inner emotions from spilling out. He seen first hand how Ima was a slut. How you ignored him like he was nothing but trash on the side of the road. How violent you got when Ima tried to touch the asshole in the suite. How you stuck up for him when he tried to grab your hand but Lorenzo stopped him. His heart sank into his stomach. He made a terrible choice. Kozik watched as Happy sat there. To most people it would look like he was relaxing, but Kozik knew how his brother was. “Happy, I need your help.” Happy looked up to Kozik and nodded. He followed him outside of Cara Cara. “You relized you fucked up right?” Happy nodded. “I am not sure who she is supposed to be with. I know damn well that Lorenzo would never hurt her. I also know you love her to the moon and back as they say. Yet, never once did you go to try and get back with her when you left her.. you never tried to make things right. So when she appeared again, it was odd you wanted her back..” “I had distractions.. Club was riding me hard. I knew damn well that I missed her daily. I should have never left her in the first place.. thought she would be better off and maybe she is..” Koziks face fell slightly. He was not use to his brother being so low. “Up to you.” Kozik shrugged. “I hate to be mean, but you hurt her. She was so upset in New York. I could see the pain take over her again and it was a terrible sight.” “We fight so much. When we are good we are great.. but we are bad it is like being in hell hottest fire..” Kozik chuckled a bit at that. “No kidding.” “I don’t know what to do…” Happy sat on the curb of the road. Head in hands as his eyes filled with tears. “Out of everyone in the world, she was the last person I wanted to hurt..” Kozik seen the tears stream down Happys face. He sighed slightly sitting next to him. “I will see if I can get her to talk to you…” Happy looked at him with a slight smile that was so rare. “Thank you..”

[theclash]

I was gonna say do all of them but that’s a fucking lot so do all the evens

okay babeeeeey I’m finally getting around 2 it!

2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not)A RACCOON 

4: What was your favorite video game growing up?Animal Crossing, Mario Kart, Sonic and Tails 2

8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic]just had to take a quiz for this, I got melancholic 

10: Are you allergic to anything?penicillin, msg, pollen, various food dyes and random other things

12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa?COFFEE

14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson?vampire

16: How tall are you?5ft 8in

18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]116lbs

20: Do you like space or the ocean more?space

22: Pet peeves?loud chewing, tapping, background noise that’s repetitive 

24: Favorite constellation?leo cuz im a leo 

26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls?this is such a weird question ghfjdkhgkh uhh idk!

28: Do you think global warming is real?duh

30: Favorite movie?the wall or yellow submarine

32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime?3 dogs, 2 cats, probably about 60 different chickens, 20 or so fish, a cricket, a spider

34: What is a color that calms you?blue

36: Where were you born?Tacoma, WA

38: Introvert or extrovert?Extrovert

40: Hugs or kisses?both but only for my gf

42: Who is someone you love deeply?gf :)

44: Do you like tattoos and piercings?yea but its not like OOGOHHH TATTOOS PIERCINGS SO SEXY its more like I like them but I dont have a preference whether someone has them or not

46: Talk about your crush, if you have one!her name is Em and she’s strong and cute and soft and fun and i wanna see her Right NOW

48: A sound you really love?seagull noises

50: Can you do the splits?nope

52: Favorite movie?it already asked this ghfjkd

54: What color would you like your hair to be right now?i like it brown but like if I didnt have to have it look decent/’appropriate’ at work then silver or something would be cool idk sometimes I feel like I wanna bleach it too

56: Something that calms you down?watching soap carving asmr videos honestly LMAO. & being held by gf obv

58: What does your URL mean?i like the clash and joe & I’m a lesbian

60: Do you believe in evolution?Yup

62: What makes you follow a blog?pure clout

64: Favorite animal(s):raccoon :)

66: Favorite emoticon:🤠

68: What is your MBTI personality type?ENTP

70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog?mine couldn’t

72: Post a selfie or two?I’m on computer snzzz 

74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself?i’m sexy

76: Do you like birds?DUH

78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you?I’ve never been ice skating cuz I’m too clumsy but swimming isnt very fun either idk I cant see for shit when I’m in the water

80: Some thing you wish did exist:lil wayne

82: Something you really enjoy doing:being swaggie 

84: What was your first impression of Tumblr?god I have no clue I joined it within its first year of existence 

86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes?yea my avg is/was around 7

88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely?no

90: If you were an animal, which one would you be?raccoon but im not a furry

92: A store you hate?ummm. idk. hollister I guess fuck hollister lives (sorry paul simonon)

94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds?fly (2 gf)

96: Winter or summer?summer

98: Least favorite person?god

100: A store you love?local record store

102: Where do you live?house

104: What is your favorite mineral or gem?stevens universe. idk any of the blue ones are epic

106: Do you like bugs?not the ones that fly constantly (ie pine conifer bugs are my fav and they fly but like I hate flies, gnats, moths, etc)

108: Something you get paranoid about?oh boy lol

110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked?i have no clue who tf keeps track 

112: Ever been bitten by a spider?most ppl have?????

114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days?sunny

116: Favorite cloud type:sick clouds xD xD xD XD

118: Do you have freckles?no

120: Fruits or vegetables?vegetal

122: Is the ocean or sky prettier?do you love the colors of the sky

124: Bright or dim lights?dim usually cuz I often have a headache but I also cant see for shit when its dim

126: Something you hate about Tumblr:mclennon shippers

128: What do you think about the least?bro how are we supposed to just come up wth what we thinkg about the least. what I think about the least is Whatever it is that I think about the least

130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now?some men.

132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures?not usually I’m really self conscious about my mouth in pictures I usually try to cover it honestly lol except in selfies cuz I can actually see how it looks

134: Do you like roller coasters?yes but not the ones that do loops

136: Are your ears lobed or attached?i looked up the two for a comparison so I could give an answer and apparently that whole concept is a myth

138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are?usually like a 7 

140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends?nope

142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others?good? idk

144: What makes you angrymen. thinking in both a broad and specific sense

146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries?im a lesbian

148: Favorite physical thing about yourself:eyes

150: Name three people you would like to talk to right now in person.Em, Greg Hawkes, Roger Waters

152: Do you like BuzzFeed?

154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons?I have never platonically kissed anyone lol I’ve literally only kissed my GF 

156: What embarrasses you?not much

158: Biggest lie you have ever told:once I was questioned whether I cheated on my math by using a calculator and I said no which was a lie then I got detention

160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)?29,551 

162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)?17,329

164: Do you have long or short hair?medium?

166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religon?mmmm dont make me get in to it

168: Do you like to wear makeup?only sometimes

170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully?yes

[friendlyneighborhoodcapricorn]

omg i cant believe ive never heard of those beforeㅠㅠ they're such cute ideas! then i guess i'll request a match up for MCU or TASM!

My preferred pronouns are he/they and im bisexual with a slight preference for guys. now for organizing the mess that is me..

personality: I'm pretty introverted, but once im talking to people im comfortable with i can get super talkative. I love thinking about philosophical or spiritual things, and asking questions with no real answers. I also love talking to other people about those things. I'm really open minded and always try to see things from as many different angles as possible to try to get a better understanding of the universe. im pretty confident, but i also don't like myself? its a weird combo. im also super competitive. if im not the best at something, i will get frustrated and extremely jealous of people who are better than me. when that happens though, i calm myself down by reminding myself its just my insecurities and its okay to not be the best. ive been told that im a good listener. i will sit there and listen to any of your problems and offer advice or a shoulder to cry on only if thats what you want, or i can just be there for you. and im daydreaming about 99% of the time..

hobbies/what do i like?: I love drawing. anytime i have freetime at home or at school, ill end up sketching something on my ipad or on a piece of paper. all of my assignments are covered in doodles, as are my hands. i also love singing and will belt out musical numbers (tick tick boom, dear evan hansen, be more chill, etc) all day long. i also really like reading, especially fantasy or romance books! or books that make you question life and your morals. i listen to a lot of music, mostly indie/rock or musicals (as mentioned earlier). i like most artsy things, really. i whittle a little, sculpt things, paint on clothes, and im always willing to try something new in that regard. OH and i loove playing instruments! i can play the piano, violin, ukulele, and guitar, and they're definitely hobbies for me.

what do i look like?: i'm short. 5'3 (sobbing in ftm), really short hair (think kpop guy idol), brown eyes, cool skin tone, and weirdly muscular shoulders? I like jewelry; always have a ring or two on, bracelets, a necklace, and two piercings on each ear (on the lobe). i wear jeans, sweaters, hoodies casually but also blazers, long coats, and suit jackets when im feeling it. love me a good pair of doc martins.

I wrote a lot more than i thought i would.. sorry about that? but i also hope extra info wouldve been more helpful? anyway, thanks! and have a great day<33

Hey, the more info, the more detailed I can make this :)

I match you with...

Tony Stark

I hesitated between Tony and Gwen Stacy for a bit, but since you have a preference for guys, I went with Tony.

The two of you are both the type to project confidence but beneath the surface are actually quite insecure, so you two hype one another up!

Since this is the guy who invented time travel, you can definitely count on him talking philosophy with you. He's a little less spiritually inclined, but then again: he's friends with a literal god.

Be careful about what kind of question with no real answer you ask because Tony will go out of his way to find an answer. Like, he'll prove the existence of some kind of obscure paradox and call it a weekend project.

But this actually works pretty well, because Tony likes knowing things and you make him think of things he had never even considered before.

If he comes up with a new idea for a suit or something, he'll ask you to sketch it because Tony wouldn't be able to draw a stick figure to save his life.

Discussing your favourite rock bands together.

Tony is insanely jealous of the fact that you can play multiple instruments while he never even managed to play one.

Being short sucks (trust me, I know lol) but it does mean that you can steal his band shirts and claim them as your own, which makes it bearable.

You've definitely sat through many a frustrated rant, but he always apologizes for bothering you with them. It takes a lot of convincing to get him to belief you really don't mind.

However, that doesn't mean he doesn't try to make it up to you. So uh, if you're allergic to anyhting, make sure he knows ;)

There you go, I hope you enjoyed it! Thank you for requesting, and have a lovely day/night :)

[lesbehoesordietrying]

Get to know me tag

Rules: answer these 84 statements about yourself then tag people

Tagged by: @shippinggayandallthatjazz

LAST

Drink: water

Phonecall: my sister, my nephew wanted to say hello

Text message: “sorry im busy” , such a lie

Song you listened to: one call away- charlie puth

Time you cried:  today 

EVER

Dated someone twice: No 

Kissed someone and regretted it: have yet to regret a kiss

Been cheated on: nope

Lost someone special: Ya

Been depressed: also ya

Gotten drunk and thrown up: ya, i think my tally is like 3

Favourite colour:  blue

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU

Made new friends: yep im surprised too

Fallen out of love: i mean probably?

Laughed until you cried:  that is my life?

Found out someone was talking about you: i mean i have siblings? i KNOW i have been

Met someone who changed you: doesn't every human encounter kinda affect you?

Found out who your real friends are: ive always had “real friends”

Kissed someone on your facebook friends list:  yepity doo

GENERAL

How many of your facebook friends do you know in real life:  like 99%

Do you have any pets:  no, its a sad day

Do you want to change your name: not really im kinda attached to it.

What did you do for your last birthday:  drove to my brothers, it was in a cramped car with the fambam so not fun.

What time did you wake up today: 6am... my sister woke me to help with a test?

What were your doing at midnight last night:  probs dreaming

What is something you can’t wait for: working at my old high school, getting a dog and reading to it harry potter.

Last time you saw your mother:  today

What are you listening to right now:  the sounds of the dryer and the fire crackling, the sound of my typing aswell. 

Have you ever talked to a tom: yes?

Something that’s getting on your nerves: injustice in any form, someone assuming im stupid, life? 

Most visited website: Tumblr is my life 

Hair colour: brown or mousy brown?

Long or short hair: both? growing out an undercut is a bitch

Do you have a crush on someone:  define crush/ probably?

What do you like about yourself:  my humour, kindness and my eyes and my friends.

Want any piercings:  give me infinite money, i will be a walking piercing display book

Blood type: human

Nicknames: lil avocahoe, loz, loza, lozenger, churchill

Relationship status: Single 

Zodiac: Capricorn

Pronouns: she/her

Favourite tv shows: i mean have you seen my blog? wynonna earp, supergirl, oitnb, carmilla, one day ata time,  anything gay or political. 

Tattoos: none, i want them so baddddd

Right or left handed: right handed

Ever had surgery: nope

Piercings:  just the usual lobe ones

Sport:  softball (yes its a stereotype but im a good catcher)

Vacation:  i need one

Trainers: those things your run in? the only exercise i do is running away from problems

MOST GENERAL

Eating: a cheesy

Drink: i like coke no sugar

I’m about to watch:  the other side of my eyelids

Waiting for:  a smile that will stop me in my tracks

Want: money and love (im a cold money driven Capricorn remember)

Getting married:  not atm but hey any volunteers?

Career: teaching or psychology idk

WHICH IS BETTER

Hugs or kisses: hugs 

Lips or eyes:  eyes

Shorter or taller:  im not heightist :)

Older or younger:  similiar age to me is fine

Nice arms or stomach:  i mean both?

Hook up or relationship: whichever is more fun

Troublemaker or hesitant:  hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER

Kissed a stranger: yep

Drank hard liquor:  yesssss i need some rn

Lost glasses: i can see so no?

Turned someone down:  yeah, sorry dudes

Sex on the first date: not yet

Had your heart broken: Yep 

Been arrested: not as of yet

Cried when someone died:  yes to both reality and fantasy RIP Dobby

Fallen for a friend: unfortunately 

DO YOU BELIEVE IN

Miracles: nahhh

Love at first sight: idk?

Santa Claus:  i mean will i get presents if i say yes?

Kiss on a first date: can you believe in that? 

Angels: umm waverly earp? yes

OTHER

Best friends name: i dont have one, rude to bring that up.

Eye colour:  blue

Favourite movie:  the day after tomorrow, star dust and pitch perfect

Favourite actor/actress: Natasha Negovanlis, Elise Bauman, Anna Kendrick, Gal Gadot, i have alot okay.

Tagging: @practicing-reckless-optimism @alphashiver

[sincerlyyme-blog]

Group Therapy (CONNOR MURPHY x READER)

AUTHORS NOTE: hello!!!!! i am back!!!!!!! i wrote this little thing, in hopes of making it a multiple part series. so this is just part one! but if you guys dont like it, let me know and ill just leave it as it is. I also want to take a moment to say that i am back to UPLOADING A FIC OR HEADCANON ONCE A DAY!! when i first started this blog, that was my uploading schedule. life got in the way, but im back baby!!!!! 

Word Count: 2.4k ish

TW: suicide, suicide descriptions, swearing, therapy groups , etc

PS: i have been to many group therapies, so this is all just based purely on personal experience. so if this is triggering to you, please dont read any further!!!!

           Connor Murphy was special. Not special in the way you would describe a rare artifact or gem. He was special like the waves in the ocean, the colours in the sky, or oil paint on a canvas. He was special because you knew what to expect. Like a wave in the ocean, you expected to crash. Like the colours in the sky, you expected to fade out after hours of daylight. Like oil paint on a canvas, you expected to dry and harden after creating something beautiful. Connor Murphy was a synonym for beautiful; only the rarest of poets could find in a dictionary. He was the sound that rolled off of the tongue of a politician. He was the feeling of warm laundry, draping around your body. Connor was all of these things—which is why his downfall was to be expected.

           You had tried numerous group therapies in the past. None of them seemed to improve your feelings or behaviors. But they stabilized your health, which is all you could really ask for. There was something equally pleasing and eerie about joining group therapy. It was oddly satisfying to hear everyone bitch and complain, but also eerie that the painted beige walls would contain a group of kids who tried to kill themselves. Talk about a Suicide Squad.

           You drove yourself to group therapy. This one was named Youth Wonders: Group Therapy and Psychiatrics. The name was slathered on the brick building in bronze lettering. It looked ancient. Maybe it looked cool back in 2002, but it made you roll your eyes just at the sight. You were 5 minutes early. Your keys were still lodged into your car ignition. This was the hardest part: getting out of the car. There was always that part of you that was tempted to ditch, go eat some McDonald’s for the hour, and go back home to tell your dad that everything went well. The feeling of guilt spread over your stomach just at the thought. You have lied to your father many times before. He didn’t deserve to be lied to again.

           Finally, you slumped out of the driver’s seat and walked into the horrid building. It smelt like old carpet and candle wax. Kind of like a church. But nothing Holy grew an abundance to you whilst walking through the halls. A white, thick door was stood open with a brick. On the inside if the door, facing you, a pink slip of paper was taped up.

“TEEN YOUTH SUICIDAL THERAPY GROUP”

           They really don’t sugar coat anything here. Your footsteps grew heavier as you walked through the door. Plastic chairs were all set up in a circle. Inside there were only four teenagers, and a woman who had a strange resemblance to Whoopi Goldberg.

           “Name, please?” her scratchy voice echoed off the walls. Her dry hands where clutching a clipboard and her pink pen was held between her fingers, like a cigarette.

           “Oh, uh, Y/N L/N,” you frowned, taking a seat across from her.

           According to the amount of chairs set up, there were only six people in the group. You, an empty chair, Whoopi-Goldberg-lady, and an empty chair. The empty chair was to your left. You stared at it, feeling cold. The awkward tension in the room was thick enough to cut with a knife. You took this moment of silence as an opportunity to look around the room. All of the teens glared at their feet.

           The girl next to you had red hair. Her face was populated with cystic acne that looked painful to the touch. Her ginger locks were pulled into a low ponytail. She wore a large men’s sweater that hung off of her skinny body. Sitting to her left was a large Filipino boy. He wore a purple sweater and old hiking shoes. The toe of the boots were worn out and his big toe peeked out. His hair was greasy, and he looked in need of a shower. Down the line, in the circle, sat a Latina girl. Her hair was done perfectly and her ears were pierced. Big golden hoops dangled from the lobes, reaching her collarbone. She was chewing bubblegum, and wearing a croptop – even though the temperature was just above freezing. Finally, in the corner sat a very pale white boy. He was short and skinny. He looked like he was 12 years old. His minecraft shirt had large orange stains, and had blonde whiskers growing in on his upper lip.

           Whoopi-Goldberg-lady took a final sigh, clicking her pen. Just as she opened her mouth to speak, another person stomped in.

           “You finally decided to join us…” the woman looked at her clipboard before reading out loud, “Connor?”

           The boy grunted in response, throwing his body down onto the chair next to you. You winced at the sound. He had long hair. The ends curled into the collar of his denim jacket. Your eyes trailed up to his face. The muscles in his jaw flexed as he grinded his teeth together. The Whoopi-lady stood up, smoothing out the material of her chiffon blouse.

           “Welcome, everyone. My name is Liz,” she spoke above her gravely tone.

           Her name was Liz. Finally, you could stop referring to her as the Whoopi-Goldberg-lady, in your head.

           “I will be your counselor and guide for this group. Within our 9 weeks here, I expect all of you to hit a few goals. The first being: opening up. I want you to share your story, knowing that whatever is said in here, stays in here.”

           You could hear the boy next to you, practically scoff.

           “So the first thing we are going to do is; go around the room, say your name, age, and explain why you are here.”

           You could feel everyone tense up.

           “Let’s start with,” Liz glanced at her clipboard. “Jamie.”

           The red-haired girl sat up straight. She removed her fingers from her mouth, as she was just chewing on her cuticles moments ago. Her bleeding fingers dove into the sleeves of her sweater.

           “Hi, I’m Jamie,” she spoke softly, almost like a robot. “I’m 15 and I’m here because I overdosed on sleeping pills.”

           Liz nodded, “Ok. Great. Thank you, Jamie.”

           Next in line was the boy in hiking boots.

           “Hi, I’m Leroy. I’m 16 and I tried to hang myself from a tree,” his voice was a deep baritone. But was quickly cut off by the Latina girl beside him.

           “Did the tree break, fatty?”

           “Andrea,” Liz warned. “This is supposed to be a safe space.”

           “Ok, yeah, whatever. I’m Andrea. I’m 18. This is my third time here. I took too much meth and blacked the fuck out. So I’m here,” she snapped her gum, fingering the golden hoop on her ear.

           “Daniel, your turn,” Liz looked at the small pale boy.

“Hi, um, I’m Daniel. I’m 16 and I, uh,” the boy began to sob violently. Your heart broke a little bit. The boy next to you, Connor, scoffed. You were almost in disbelief at his heartless gesture.

“It’s ok, hun. Take your time,” Liz spoke softly.

Daniel continued, hiccupping and telling the group how he tried to end his life just two weeks prior. After many tissues, Liz continued down the line.

“Connor?”

The boy next to you, shifted in his seat. He was now sitting up, straight. His long legs tangled over each other. His large, black combat boots looked heavy against his skinny shins. He was wearing a lot of layers.

“Yeah, hi, I’m Connor. I’m 17. I tried killing myself 3 weeks ago.”

“How? You have to say how,” Andrea twirled her hair around her finger.

“Why? Do you get off to people’s backstories or some shit?” he hissed back.

Liz waved the two of them off, gesturing that it was okay to keep those details private. Next was you. And you could feel your breath become heavy. All eyes landed on you.

“Well, uh, my name is Y/N. I’m 17, also. I tried killing myself last year, but I’m here because my therapist told me to,” you spoke softly.

“That’s fucking boring.”

“Andrea!”

 You were pouring coffee into a Styrofoam cup, rubbing the drowsiness out of your eyes. It was the half-way mark through group therapy. The group is given a 15 minute break between the two hours, and there is a small table full of shitty snacks and coffee.

“Coffee at 1pm?” a voice spoke from behind you. You turned to see that Connor boy offering you a lazy smirk.

“Yeah, what’s wrong with that?”            “Well it’s shitty filtered coffee, and no one drinks coffee in the middle of the afternoon.”

“I didn’t know you cared so much,” you spoke while moving to the side, putting creamer and 8 packets of sugar into the small cup. “I just didn’t sleep well last night.”

“Jesus Christ,” he gaped at the amount of sugar you put in.

“It’s good, you should try it some time,” you mused, taking a small sip.

Connor shook his head, pouring some of the filtered brew into a cup of his own. “No, thanks. I’d like to live well into my thirties.”

“Isn’t that the opposite of why you’re here?”

“Touché.”

 The rest of the afternoon went as expected. Red-haired girl went on a rant about her dad never loving her, Daniel cried some more, and Liz gave us homework to complete for next week. The green folder full of worksheets will be added to the pile of therapy homework that you never do. You have other things on your plate. You have a job, school, and university to think about.

While walking to your car, you see the tall boy leaning against the hood of your car.

“Uh, hi?” you spoke, raising on eyebrow.

He jumped a little bit, not seeing you at first. “Oh, hey, can you drive me home? My dad is at work and my mom…” he trailed off, looking at his feet.

You scratched the back of your head, not really knowing what to say.

“I’m sorry, I barely even know you. I should just walk home-“ he began to ramble, grabbing his messenger bag from between his feet.

“Get in,” you sighed, unlocking the car.

“Wait. Really?”

“What’s your address?”

The car ride was pretty silent. It contained the sound of your humming motor, and the small murmurs of directions from Connor. You had asked him what street he lived on, but he just told you that he would direct you there. He lived on the outskirts of the city. By following his directions, you drove into the suburbs. The houses were all parallel to each other. Each of them very large, big two-car garages, and nicely trimmed lawns. It was the type of neighborhood that would give out the good candy on Halloween.

“It’s the house on left, here,” he mumbled once again. Your eyes practically bugged out of your head.

“This one?” you took one hand off the steering-wheel to point to the house in front of you. It was gigantic. It was painted yellow with a dark blue door. It must have been at least 4 stories high. The backyard, from what you could see, was massive. Two large pillars on other side of the front door, reminding you of pictures in textbooks about ancient Rome.

As you pulled into his driveway, Connor picked at his nail polish. “What? Are you surprised?”

“A little,” you laughed, looking over at him.

He began to pick up his bag, looking over at you. The sunset in the sky casted a pink shadow in your car, making everything a rose colour.

“Well, uh, thanks. I’ll see you next week,” he spoke, stepping out of your car.

You watched as the goth boy walked into the giant, yellow house. It was a sight to see.

 Next week rolled around, and you were five minutes early. You sat in your car, rubbing your temples. Another night without sleep. It was beginning to take a toll. Sitting in your car became a ritual you had. It gave you time to mope, before having to put on a brave face for wherever you were going. You let out a large sigh. Your head was pounding. Placing your forehead in the palms of your hands, you laid them down on the steering wheel. Closing your eyes, you were grateful to have a second to decompose.

It was quiet until you heard your passenger door open and slam shut. You let out a scream, sitting back, looking at the man who just entered. It was Connor.

“WHAT THE HELL?”

“Chill the fuck out.”

“CONNOR, YOU CAN’T JUST DO THAT.”

“What? Get in someone’s car? I know. I’m not an idiot.”

You began to go on a slight rampage, telling him about how many girls get abducted by leaving their cars unlocked. He responded by telling you to ‘lock your fucking car, then’. Before you could shout another witty response, he shoved a cup of hot coffee into your hand.

“Here.”            “What… What is this?”

“Coffee, you dumbass.”

“Yeah, I know. But why?”

He just shrugged, taking a sip out of his own cup, leaning back in the passenger seat.

“So, why do you sit in here?” he mumbled against the warm lid of his beverage.

“It’s just nice, I guess?” you spoke out softly, rubbing your eyes.

Connor nodded, drinking his coffee quietly. You did the same.

  Lunch time came around. Therapy had been going well. But you couldn’t help but find yourself staring into space every other minute. It was no group participation. It consisted of Liz telling everyone that how they were feeling is “okay”. It wasn’t anything that you hadn’t heard before.

You stood up the moment Liz said that your 15 minute break began. You walked over to the snack table, pouring another cup of coffee. Connor watched you from his seat, chewing on his bottom lip.

No one else had picked up on your caffeine habits. Rather, the rest of the teenagers fought over the sugar cookies that were lined up on the table. You walked back to your seat, sighing loudly as your butt hit the chair. You took a large gulp of the cheap caffeine, letting your eyes settle close for a moment.

“You know, I never got to hear your story last week,” you spoke softly with your eyes still closed.

“Well, same goes to you, I guess,” he mumbled back, slouching into his chair.

You cracked an eye open, looking at him. “Mine isn’t as recent.”

He shrugged back, watching you as your eyes flutter shut once more.

“My family is shit. My parents hate me. Some kid wrote a weird letter about my sister. I freaked the fuck out. It was just kind of the last straw, I guess?”

 It was quiet for a few more moments. You opened your mouth to speak, then Liz clapped loudly, asking everyone to return to their seats. Group began again, and Connor avoided your eyes at all costs.