#i know my entire reader base here can only read reader inserts

[ujunxverse]

for the real ones that know how much i want to write a succession!au fic, here's the bad news first: yuppie!yeonjun and his parasite/fraud au meets succession may not come to fruition BUT fear not, for succession shimkongz WILL BE here, and she will be CHAPTERED. NO MORE FORMATTING ISSUES ON THIS HELLSITE OR HAVING TO SCROLL AND GET LOST. NEATLY ORGANIZED CHAPTERS!

[broadwaybalogna]

Times I’ve inserted myself onto Zuko or Katara and helped myself.

I JUST made a post about self inserting on Katara and also Zuko and how it’s okay. This post will go over times I’ve done it and how I was able to help myself through rough times.

1. An except from “They Say Beauty is Pain”, a fic I wrote surrounding body image and dysmorphia.

”I don’t know. I guess I just…” she struggled to find the words to explain her feelings, “for lack of a better term, wish I liked my body more?”

[…]

”I think there are parts of ourselves that we all fail to understand and accept,” he finally began after a long pause. “I mean, look at me. I have a huge scar on my face but you sit next to me and tell me how beautiful it makes me. […] The same goes for you. […] Whatever you may dislike about yourself, I know I love it more than you could imagine. […] We all have things we’re insecure about, yeah. But I think the opinions that matter most are those closest to us and can best shape us to love ourselves the most. If that even makes sense.”

This entire one-shot was me writing about my experience with my body. As a firm hurt/comfort lover, I had to find a way for Katara (or me) to be comforted. This can go for my readers as well, people who may associate themselves with Katara and also suffer from body image issues can (I hope) read this and feel comforted about themselves.

2. An except from “Sleep When You Can, My Dear (I’ll Be Here When You Wake)” a fic I wrote about taking meds and the effects it can have on a person.

”For a long time, I didn’t know who I was without my trauma. It shaped my entire personality to who I am today. Every piece of me became what it was because of my own suffering. I didn’t know how different I would be if I… healed. The idea of a version of myself that wasn’t who I was in that moment was scary… But I realized, over time, that even though those moments will forever shape who I am as a person, they don’t have to define me. I am not some girl who lost her mother two years ago and goes to therapy for it. I’m more than that. And you’re more than the boy with father issues who needs medication. We improve ourselves each day by living and accepting that we can be better. And I look forward to knowing that the next day, I’ll get new experiences that will shape who I become.”

Guys, I can only write stuff like this by putting myself into the characters shoes. I actually technically inserted myself into BOTH Katara and Zuko to write this. How would I react to someone saying this? How would I comfort my partner (if I had one)?

3. An except from “The Psychology of a Test” which is about finding a balance between school and life.

“Zuko,” Katara finally said, lowering her voice and finally becoming more calm, “I don’t really know much about your relationship with your dad- or school. But it was so nice seeing you actually happy and talking these past few days. It really put things into perspective for me. I realize that I’ve been studying so much all the time, that I never thought about how it affected you. I’m sorry.”

“What? No, don’t be sorry. My relationship with school is.. complicated at best, but in no way is any of it your fault,” he sat up to face Katara, “but I have realized how much more I like being free. I just need to find a balance.”

“Could I- could I help you find it?” Katara asked after a short moment has passed.

“I’d love that.”

Many published authors will say that what they write is based on real experiences they have gone through. Why is it okay for published authors to do this and not fanfiction authors?

Don’t let ANYONE tell you that you can’t write characters to connect with you.

You CAN.

[stormyjane7]

Letting Go Together

Summary:

if you get confused or want more information on why this Tav doesn't want sex, i wrote a prequel to that. https://archiveofourown.org/works/53581099 As i said before, for this series this is based on the HC of my Tav, but i do not give any descriptions or name so that you, the reader, can insert yourself in! Enjoy!

TW: nsfw, mutual masturbation Read on Ao3

The trek from the grove to, and now through the mountain had been long and tiresome. Your crew of misfits now taking their night cap around the fire close to where the creche should be. You would attempt to seek out help there tomorrow for your worm problem. 

On the way here, you and Astarion decided that you would like to share tents as you were starting to get closer together. You felt especially safe around him after you shared wine and knife in the woods not even a tenday ago. You spent most nights up talking through both of your shit, even if you felt Astarion was holding back still, that it just made sense to combine tents and fall asleep whenever you felt like it. 

Your camp mates were unaware as to the true nature of the relationship. They knew you were close, but you have had to already rebuke a few passing attempts from others, stating simply that you were not interested in sex with anyone at the moment.They weren’t close enough to know the whys yet.

Astarion, on the other hand, was very well versed in why you were refraining from any sexual activity. It was a nice change of pace for him, even if it caught him way off guard. It was starting to get harder to stick to this mind set after sleeping next to him every night. You truly have never felt safer, but you also wanted to make sure you weren’t making a mistake again.

Tonight though, you decided to change things up just a touch. You wanted to have more skin to skin contact with your beau, so you shimmied down into your small clothes so that your bits were still covered but that you could feel more of him in other areas. He was pretty thrilled at the idea and joined you but only removed his shirt. Your clothes both now just piled up on the side.

He was letting you trace the scars on his back gently. You couldn’t make any of the infernal out, but you hoped with your soft touch you could erase some of the horrid memories that had been flayed into his flesh.  As you were placing a few small kisses on his upper back, a horrible crash sounded out in the camp. You grabbed a shirt and threw it on to run outside the tent.

Everyone was standing around a very fluffy and very panicked owlbear cub. It seemed to have been the one you had saved before at the goblin camp. You got closer and knelt down taking a swig of an animal speaking potion Halsin had thrown your way.

You found out that the poor thing was hungry and got it a bit of food. Scratch came over to help calm him down and find a good spot to rest for the night.

When you stood up you noticed that everyone was staring at you.

“Well soldier. Finally banged fangs?”

“Huh? Where in the world did you get that idea from?” “You happen to be wearing nothing but his shirt, Tav.” Wyll chimed in.

You started to panic. You look down and indeed, you were wearing only Astarion’s shirt. The top of your chest smalls were peeking through thankfully to cover where your breast would have been showing. You could feel your entire body flush red as you were truly embarrassed by this situation.

You coughed before speaking again. “No, we have not, banged, as you say Karlach. Not that it’s anyone’s business, but cuddles can be nice when most clothes aren’t involved.”

“I think that’s wonderful you’re keeping it chaste, well, as much as chaste as you are doing.” Wyll, ever the romantic, was thankfully helping the tension that had formed in the group. Pack of wild animals you thought, salivating at the mere thought of sex it seems.

You turned towards Astarion and quickly flushed bright again. The man was standing there, with fire in his eyes taking the sight of you in. You gulped as he reached for your hand to drag you back to the tent. He had closed and secured the flaps and had you in a searing kiss in a flash of a moment.

“Gods above, you truly test my will tonight darling. You look amazing in just my shirt.” He nipped at your ear which made you squeak. 

“Astarion..” He growled hearing his name from your lips like this. This caused heat to go straight to your center. You were in agreement, tonight would be a test of your resolve.

“I know darling, I know.” He said sweetly as he sat down on the bedrolls with a bit of a huff. “I will not cross that line until you are ready, I promise. But I can tell it’s not just me who’s heated tonight. Can we try something?”

You sat down facing him, “And what would that be?”

“We can still help each other get the obviously needed release we both need without any penetration of any sort.” Your face brightened at the idea. Was this something possible? Your experience was limited to the bastard that left you afraid to have sex again. While that time was consensual, the fact that he stole your dowry and left you pregnant, left a sour taste in your mouth. You had no lovers till now so you felt as if you were brand new to everything again. 

“We have a few choices, but here’s one I’d like us to try. Come sit on my lap. We can be together while we touch our own bodies.” He trailed off letting his words sink in. “No penetration, but being close to each other would be so nice.” He growled the last word.

“Mmm. That does sound nice. Okay let’s do it!” You start to take his shirt off of you when he tuts at you.

“Keep the shirt on, lose anything else you’re comfortable with.” He grinned up at you.

You went ahead and shimmied out of your underwear as he decided to go completely bare.

“Oh now I feel overdressed..” “Hush and come sit on my lap darling.”

Straddling his legs you sat down more towards his knees. Giving a glance down at his now upright cock, you started to blush. He is thicker and a tad longer than your last person. You wonder how in the world it was going to fit if and when you both decide to bed the other.

He leans forward and gives you a kiss as he wraps a hand around his aching cock.

You watch him quietly so many thoughts going through your head. You wondered how it would feel or even taste. 

“Darling as much as I love that I have enchanted you with my cock,” he smirks, “don’t forget to touch yourself too. I want to watch you as well.”

You flush at his words and nod. Slowly you lowered you hand down to your already slick folds. Your hand found your clit and rubbed in time to the speed Astarion was pumping his cock. Precum was already dripping from his tip. It made you salivate. 

Both your breathing started turning into pants. Watching each other stroke yourself was turning both you on so much. You lean forward to embrace him in another kiss. You both speed up as the desire was pulling you spiraling. 

“Oh gods I’m gunna cum.”  You lean into Astarion for support. 

“Let go darling.”

Your orgasm rips through you and makes you tremble against Astarion’s chest. He pulled you in for a kiss as you rode out the waves of pleasure. You could feel him tense while still stroking his cock. You pressed your forehead against his wondering if he’d let you touch him at this moment.

“Lean back darling. Let me see just how wet you are.” He breaks the silence. His eyes filled with so much desire. You nod at his request.

You lean back using your other arm to brace yourself. Youmove the shirt up to show your lower self. Your hand trailing back down to spread your lips open to show your lover. 

“Fuuck, Tav.” He pumped his cock one last time before his seed spilled out over both your stomachs. 

This time it was your turn to pull him into a kiss while he rode out his climax. He was a shuddering mess under you and you felt happy for once with this level of intimacy with someone. 

You both sit there panting for a bit. Astarion reaches over to grab a rag to clean his mess up from your bodies. 

“That was hotter than I thought it would be when I suggested it.”

You hummed in approval, moving off him to put your underwear back on. You flip down next to him. 

“That was amazing. Just what we needed I think.” You turn towards him. ”You think next time I can taste you?”

“Oh I’m sure I’ll allow it.” He smirks and snuggles down next to you covering you both in blankets so that you both could trance. 

[grievedifferent]

CHRIS 4 JOSH? let's talk about it ... and let's be honest.

read more for length only, it's all pretty sfw and non-triggering content.

speaking with otter first and foremost, here are her thoughts on the matter:

for context, she has a degree in video game art & design, so she knows the entire pipeline for how video games were and are made currently. she actually graduated like right around when UD came out, so this is perfect because she also helped me understand some of the modeling and why the original game is just honestly more fluid in mechanics versus the remake, so i've been giving the remake a pass in a lot of big ways and just sort of accepting everything else as is in conjunction with the original game (and in our case, the 2013 prototype).

basically, she said it originally looked like this is what likely happened: a texture artist was given permission to do a heart, someone else or that same artist put in CHRIS + JOSH and basically whoever was in charge of them (i have no names for this) likely said "you absolutely cannot confirm a fan ship, it's not happening" which is why it became CHRIS 4 JOSH. otter was explaining how the 4 looks a little off like it wasn't there originally but more of something to replace what was underneath. like a 4 covering a +.

still likely meant to be a joke, maybe it could go so far as to that texture artist shipping it, but either way, it was never going to make it into the official game as a way to be interpreted as josh and chris are canon. i know the app contradicts one major thing for chris and ash because the game itself literally confirms they both like each other in various scenes and context clues and all of that content we get in-game for them.

based on my own time being in school for video games, this makes a lot of sense. i might not have finished, but i did learn this lol. so, what she's saying is pretty on point. that's how companies are, even if it's "supermassive" ... they are working under sony.

so, does it mean anything? not really. i know this was probably huge for the other side of the UD fandom (i see it being two sides: rpc and non-rpc, which can be similar but are generally very different ... in-between those spaces are typically the fanfic writers and then the sub-genre of reader insert fanfic writers if that makes sense? anyways). but it really means nothing.

it's just a little easter egg. if we want to look into it at all? it was likely done by chris (otherwise it would say josh 4 chris if it was from josh), and also ... i know this sounds probably so lame, but that's just how guys are. they act like that, especially if you're super comfortable with a long-term friend. people have probably wondered about it based on how close and jokey they can act, they don't seem like the type to "shy away" from any sort of intimacy, especially for a joke, and idk, they're just like that? that's pretty normal.

HOWEVER ... where this gets even more interesting for me is this part: bringing in the 2011-2013 prototype, the game that was being pumped out for demos and such before supermassive did an entire rehaul of the original 2010 game (so, this is not london studio's project anymore, it hasn't been for a while, and their original iteration actually had hannah and josh as a couple named hannah and clayton).

why is this interesting? i've mentioned before several things about that prototype specifically: a) mike and chris never changed from design to actor, they were always solid (so it's weird to not even consider using their old voice banks for new content for the 2024 remake but okay??), b) this had originally intended (all the way back to london studio) to really be a "couples game" that "couples play together", giving the controller back and forth, and c) the fact that sam clearly liked josh in the original iteration, josh did not feel the same, but he had basically the same relationship with chris, who seemed to still like ash and vice versa, but josh also had a pretty high energy by comparison both in general to rami's josh and also to specifically chris in comparison to (that verison of) sam.

let's dig into 'c' a bit more. the sam and josh problem. it's not really a "problem" but i think there's somewhat of a general misunderstanding as to what their relationship is realistically like based on their connections and affiliations over what is sort of "expected of them".

here's what we know for facts:

sam and josh know each other, we can maybe assume from childhood or middle school era, but long enough for sam to be considered hannah's best friend.

which brings me to my next point: sam is hannah's best friend, not josh's. not even "hannah and beth's best friend". she is hannah's best friend. this is josh's little sister's best friend. i have to reiterate this because i see this huge sort of blackhole when it comes to this fact about sam and hannah. this is literally sam's entire tagline! even the game sort of forgets that sometimes? sam actually somewhat harshly criticizes hannah in her bedroom, something that is only open to sam and no one else. i'm not sure where this idea that sam is there for josh when she should be there for hannah. you can also tell sam and josh weren't that close over that year because she needs chris to confirm that a) this entire getting back together is a good idea and b) if josh is doing okay. if they were close, wouldn't she know? also, josh wasn't that close to anyone besides seemingly chris? which sort of makes sense but even he only lets chris see certain sides of himself. so, they aren't as close as people i think mistake them to be.

they were supposed to have something one-sided in the prototype before the finalized release. in the protoype, sam likes josh, but josh seems to not reciprocate. it's heavily hinted at when she flirts with him in the scene at the lodge door, which is very different but also somewhat the same as the version we get.

the finalized verison of sam (ie "hayden-sam") doesn't seem to have a crush on josh ("rami-josh") ... at least, from what i can tell. i think she actually feels somewhat uncomfortable around him, if we're being honest. maybe not before the prank, we can see they are comfortable together briefly in the new snapshots on the camera, but after? definitely so. this makes sense. they are somewhat avoiding each other. why would she go back there? both hannah and beth are dead, leaving josh.

finally: josh is hannah's older brother, thus acts as an older brother to the group ... sam included. this is literally in josh's characterization.

so, delving into probably headcanon territory here, and i'm not even going into my own sam headcanons ... basically, i think sam sees josh as an older brother and josh sees sam as a little sister figure. ik ik it's boring.

hear me out here: i think this was done simply because there are so many couples in the game already, which is so funny because it was supposed to be a couple's game but then got changed to a sort of "play alone or pass the controller".

now? UD is meant to be played either on your own or between multiple people, you can assign one person to each person you're playing with or just split the cast up the way otter and i do. it's more liberal and intentional to be that way versus its original intention. think about it: when you really start actually playing, there are two for sure couples, one maybe "will they won't they", and then two that aren't dating. that does feel more realistic just in general in a friend group, doesn't it? people date each other, break up, bring new members in, etc, but not everyone always dates everyone all the time.

also, i think just blanketed, supermassive wasn't even considering that likely at least one of those characters is probably gay or bisexual. until dawn is only so deep because it can only go so deep, and if they were going to go deep? it was going down the mental illness rabbit hole along with the background story they were trying to flesh together coupled with the mo-cap technology they were working with.

also, not to be that person, but life is strange came out in 2013 and kind of nailed it, right? they had their own set of issues they tackled incredibly well, whereas it doesn't really fit into UD. UD is about being a true "classic horror" story with the heavy use of intentional character tropes. so, give UD some grace here, i'd say.

cause let's get real for a second: there were so many last-minute changes while holding onto the threads of what they wanted. some stuff from the prototype for example is pretty shot-for-shot or word-for-word and some is super different. like ... im sorry, but the wolves aren't in the prototype (just as an example), so you can see how fast they decided to put those in because those wolves are literally broken animals.

back to sam and josh: taking my own headcanons aside, i don't think it's impossible to headcanon sam having a crush on josh at any point in her life that she knew him pre-UD. it's not uncommon, of course. he's classic older brother, he's fun, he's cute, he's friendly, and he's always around. again, while i think at least narratively they took that aspect of sam's character out when they cast hayden (she gives a much different, honestly better vibe for sam from the original actress, whereas ashley is like the same ngl), there is something to be said about not saying anything, i suppose. i just don't see it as something that was meant to be noticed, if that makes sense. not that it's not fitting? i guess?

but it's how josh feels, more the position he's in, that i sort of get caught up in why i'm sometimes hesitant with outright sam/josh with no plotting beforehand (as if it's canon). josh is the older brother. for him, there's sort of some lines he feels he isn't supposed to cross, trust he isn't supposed to break, and just sort of general boundaries? like, age isn't necessarily his factor here, it's literally how they met and how they know each other. it would be likely hurtful to hannah, probably awkward? i imagine?

so, is josh willing to cross his sister's comfort like that? yes, he lies to her ... about his mental health. it's never implied anywhere else that josh lies to hannah or beth about anything else. also, we can argue it's the parents hiding it from his sister's, wanting them to have a certain view of their brother.

then, post-death, we know there's a huge change in their relationship. josh and sam become distant, as i've discussed above.

with a lot of plotting and specifics, i could do it. just blanketed? or like ... how i see these characters without anyone else's interpretations in consideration? like just playing the game as is without even considering rpc? i don't see it.

so, what about josh and chris then? i'm not going to lie, i've only even recently come around to the idea, and even that comes off to me as still one-sided if it were ever even considered. likely? it would have been chris like ash, ash like chris, josh maybe likes chris? but that's so pushing it to assume supermassive would imply, though it's actually more sound for inferences in the prototype.

the chemistry josh and chris have is very natural. we can give that partially to the actors, of course, and partially to the writing. they have known each other a long time, and i've talked about it above how that's just how these types of guys are sometimes. they're just comfortable with each other.

so, even i'm just writing general headcanons without taking anyone else's specific interpretation in mind? i see it like this:

josh and chris? best friends from childhood.

chris and ash? the intended "will they / won't they" of the game.

josh and sam? older brother figure to younger sister figure (ie the friendship that can form with this type of bond, but likely nothing else).

but josh flirts with sam, remember? he infers he'd help her with the bath. he also calls mike and jess pornstars, says he wants to get friendly with ashley in the snow (and calls her a sleeper hit), etc. he's pretty mouthy about that sort of thing. it's just how he is. i guarantee if that were jessica in the bath, he'd say the same thing, and might even be more persistent about it (given that jessica is more playful than sam in that regard). however, were that emily in the bath? not a chance, he probably wouldn't have said anything tbh. i also write sam as a lesbian.

okay, so this is all "canon and great" and everything ... but what about me? what are my personal ships?

i can see so many with josh. i think that he's probably more gay than straight. he sees himself as open-minded.

does he lean more towards men or women? privately: sexually and romantically speaking, men. socially: women.

i have it that he chooses the "women make me uncomfortable" option when i play. i think this makes sense for josh.

why do women make him uncomfortable, but he socially pursues them? is he actually attracted to women? what is his sexuality for real? so, why women: it's socially understandable and acceptable. it's what he's relied on since puberty / actively encouraged to pursue since dating was on the table. he's with such a "bro" crowd — and so bro-coded both in being written that way narratively speaking while also just self-imposing that sort of role to himself ... while also naturally filling that role. his sexuality with labels: bisexual with a heavier male leaning preference, would be considered more demisexual when it comes to women. he is attracted to men romantically and sexually, and he is attracted to women, but there has to be a relationship fostered for it to be more romantic than sexual. i think he's fooled around with girls, but never had penetrative sex with them. he's likely never been with a guy, as he's very closeted, despite this being his active preference. women intimidate josh and make him uncomfortable.

further on him being more closeted despite being in the industry: josh has his family's reputation to consider. the world doesn't always agree that being bisexual is natural and non-offensive. he would be outright just called and labeled gay (which isn't entirely inaccurate but is not accurate). it could hurt his family. this isn't 2024, this is the 2010s, and yes it was getting "big" in the way we see acceptance now, but it wasn't so seen. people were (and still are) hiding. think of it like this: if josh has to hide his mental illness the way he does, he's likely having to hide his sexuality.

i think that's why the traits we do see in josh are so exacerbated because he has to stifle so much of himself down that the parts he's allowed to express become the loudest to hear.

all of that to get us here: my ships for josh.

personally? again, no other interpretations are considered necessarily, just ships i like based on various things from simply aesthetics to actual connections i can see them having.

what about chris/josh? honestly? i never even considered it until recently, and now that i have, it seems more obviously (if anything) one-sided by josh (the giver) to chris (the receiver). i don't think chris has ever consciously thought about it. josh (probably) has. as a default, however, i write them as bros. i do genuinely love their friendship. that being said, i do like it as a ship. i don't write my main plotlines with that in mind, though.

quickly: if anything, i think chris is the most compatible for josh (and vice versa). there is a lot of game evidence to support this, but that's for its own post.

josh/ashley -> this had always been my previous top ship for josh, but as more context becomes available via the remake and data mining the game, my opinions have swayed a bit, but i will always love joshley. it's a demi thing with them, i think. i also think josh is kind of jealous of ashley's relationship with chris (chapter 2 is called jealousy, and yes, that refers to the matt-mike-em-jess stuff but could be inferred to the trio), yet actively supports his bro, so doesn't really "get in the way". in fact, he encourages it.

josh/ashley/chris -> i see this as mostly ashley dating both chris and josh, maybe josh having some feelings for chris? from there, it's open-ended, but it's mostly "ashley has two boyfriends", and i am here for that. i love her.

additionally, i do ship chris/ashley. i like that josh is actively trying to get them together, and i think while it's for "nefarious reasons" or whatever you want to say when we see it in-game, josh is acting as a direct reflection to how he always has been ... so we can assume he's always been trying to get chris to make the move on ash.

josh/jess -> this is primarily aesthetically speaking, i think they just would look good together? opposites attract? pre-prank of hannah, it's definitely that ... opposites attract. he's not really her type, lbr, but she's probably his type in the way she's pretty ... but she is also intimidating to him. it's funny because, ultimately, that sort of confession to mike that jess gives about her insecurities would be very understood by josh (and actually matt, who i see as insecure), and i like all three of those boys with jess. yes, i hold jess accountable for the prank, but just character traits and such? i can see some vibes here. also! a lot of my fondness for this ship probably comes from post!verse stuff, like retribution, etc. honestly, i just like these two together not even romantically? i just want to see more of them interacting idk josh and jess are very contrasting characters that could go really well or horribly wrong together. also, i just have to say that i feel like there was some genuine interest when jess suggested that josh might be flirting with her and mike (jokingly) asked to basically have a threesome together, like she was kind of into it ngl.

why none of the other UD boys with josh? like mike and matt? we don't really see too much matt and josh unfortunately. i'm also a huge matt/jess shipper idk but i just don't see matt and josh being compatible, and i also write matt ... and i also write matt as straight, so. there's that aspect. but generally? i don't see it.

so, no em and josh? i literally do not have enough canonically to go by to even say what their default dynamic is like! they never talk!! like ever. so ... once i can establish with an emily writer what that is, i'd be more down to clown.

i can't with mike, either. i love mike btw, literally no shade to him, i don't think josh is the right fit for mike either by any means. mike is great at "handling" josh at his worst in a crisis (kind of? idk it depends sort of on the choices you make, but i get his vibe, i do get it) to get him from points a to b, but that's about it. mike also just comes off as very straight (to me).

all of that to say this: i generally write things as they are from the game unless there's a pretty good clue, inference, or some sort of thread i can unravel to make something make sense. it has to make sense for me, i'm just that type of person.

but ... with the right chemistry, plotting, and a bit of time? anything can happen. just because i default see something one way doesn't mean that i cannot be convinced otherwise ... or still hold that belief for the game itself but write enough development that i love something else in an rp sense. i'm a very "this is game, this is rp" and then from there, i take from the game to make the rp experience more game-like. does that make sense? did any of this make sense?

[reading-stains]

some cool observations I figured out after asking myself what makes a good fanfic

I wanted to randomly talk about how wonderful fanfiction is. Like really. It’s genuinely one of the most wonderful experiences being here has to offer. I’ve been having a really tough time these past few weeks, and the only thing that keeps getting me through a day has been to sit down and read a couple long fics. I’m an avid AO3 reader (don’t you dare suggest any other platform for me for reading, I like the organization okay), which yeah means I don’t read as carefully as the next person but I do read like 90% of the fic so that means something right? Reading a whole 300,000 words a day, while still having time to cook three meals separately, have a two hour tutoring session, and some space to freak out over my AP scores has got to be a superpower.

Anyways, my point is this: fanfiction is fucking amazing. How many ways worlds can come together, how many times characters can fall in love and it doesn’t get boring is just that, fucking amazing. The amount of great material I’ve found has been stellar. And since I’ve had so many hours to waste the past two weeks, my urge for fanfic reading has been consistently there. Which is strange to me because I’ve barely wanted to read, period. Academic, casual, printed, or online for months. But fanfiction is perfectly centered in what I love.

Yet I was thinking how do you make a good fanfic? After all, there’s so much, some of it is just better than the rest. And I figured I’d explore that.

Firstly, there’s the whole charm of fanfiction, since there’s something powerful in having characters you know. I’d like to highlight that it’s entirely possible and true that people can have completely different experiences in the fanfiction world. There’s Y/N and its whole self insert genre, and there’s the whole original characters' situation in universes that are explored within the OG material. Of course there’s a whole sub division of fanfic readers that love it, adore it, write it, and consume it, and who am I to judge? I guess when I say good fanfiction in this post, it’s about how good character based fanfiction works out. Because in my eyes, good fanfiction challenges the framing of a character, and works to develop a tangible change in both internal and external measures. For example, I was reading this two part (not-yet-fully-completed-but-doesn’t-really-end-in-a-cliffhanger-so-it’s-okay-as-someone-that-doesn’t-like-reading-uncomplete-stuff-I-give-the-green-light) Spideypool fic where the ship mainly worked as an empowering device for the story of Peter Parker (spoilers guys, he’s Spider-Man) finding connection, with his boss (it’s Harry Osborn :o), with his fellow superheroes, with his dying aunt, with his new boyfriend, and finally, with himself. The fic works with multiple characters to develop the plot. Good character based fanfiction in this case revolves about the multiple relationships developed between said explored characters. Because characters are fundamentally different from the source material, writing them and giving them needs and actions that feel indebted to the original want of the characters and balancing their choice from said wants is hard. It’s a fine line, tying it all up. Developing something independent from the original material to some extent, from a possibly canon compliant conversation to a whole different universe, and using that independence to further an enrichment of a world or character is necessary. Otherwise, stories bring themselves to a stalemate. Otherwise, stories bring themselves to lack character and connection to the reader. 

Meanwhile, in I Was Screaming Your Name Through The Radio (a musician!au Soukoku fic) works with incredible storytelling design, using a past and present narrative as well as work with the characters' feelings and journeys with the description of music and their lyrics. Good fanfiction, here, uses positively impacting narrative tools to develop a good, tightly done story. In the fic, the development of falling in love, betrayal, heartbreak, and healing are explored. The way the characters connect, disconnect, and reconnect is just amazing. And the way that connection or lack thereof is explored works well with the narrative style of story. Two POVs, each having two time spaces. These POVs worked around the release date of Corruption, the fictional song the two main characters created together in the fic. The interaction between time settings allowed to further explore the characters’ memories and experiences wholly. It was a better choice than to write linearly. Much more entertaining as well. This is good fanfiction, using the narrative to explore and enrich once again the story. 

Finally, there’s the greatest, most important aspect for a good fic. A great story. I wanted to highlight my first auditive fanfic in my life, and the only author I’ve been so unquestionably loyal to since I first heard her story: Mira Miraculous Ladybug Fanfiction on YouTube has forever been feeding me with rich stories, great jokes, and heartbreaking tears. What A Catch works as a creative outlet of all the powerful characters and their archetypes, and applies both a challenging reframe of a character and great narrative control. The story begins with all the main characters of the series as adults, in a wedding, unaware of the twisted memories that Hawkmoth has influenced. The story develops and explores something further than the previous two discussed factors. Before getting to that though, I want to clear up, I love romance fanfiction. It’s what I read 99.9% of the time. But I also enjoy stories that further the relationship not just with internal plot devices. The story of Marinette and Adrien is a long one, especially in the real world when the show’s been airing since 2015. However, there’s a magic in exploring something outside situations while adapting the narrative to continue the story already explored. Developing mayhem, confusion, stakes, as well as creating character growth within the flaws and victories that come with the challenges set in a fanfiction is important. Essential. Otherwise, fanfics turn into retellings, lightly chipping away the power of a story and beginning to re-make something already done. Archetypes are tools to work on choices, wants, and needs of a plot device. Characters breathe and feel with their own choices, wants, and needs along said plot. And stories? They make characters and feelings and experiences simply real.

In conclusion, what makes good fanfiction? In my humble opinion, it brings the following things. As expressed previously, first of all comes the challenging reframing of a character where depth is furthered or a new role is given. Consequently, the character keeps its original charm and familiarity while still developing a growth within the story and itself. Secondly, there’s the usage of palpable narrative control. Using narrative and literary devices to explore a story creates a better execution to the plot and the whole experience of the tale being told. Additionally, I’d like to plug in here that this requires good grammar and developed vocabulary (this doesn’t mean you need to be wordy or overwhelmingly poetic, just enjoyably readable). Thirdly, there’s the banger. The true reason stories can be done over and over again: they’re not being done over and over again. A good fanfic tells something new, explores something better, explains something different. A good fanfic has originality in its fundamental magic. For something to genuinely work as a banger in my book, you have to tell something I haven’t heard before. Something that will capture the reader. You can read a hundred coffee shop AUs, but did all of them make you feel the same, did all of them make you taste the need for more? Probably not. Because some of them will have something more than the fundamental establishment of the AU. Because there’s something new under the surface of the plot. I’ve listed three very different fanfics. One was clearly driven in canon spaces, another in a completely alternative universe, and the final one works after the culmination of the work explored in the original material. Fanfiction is endless, and it’s powerful. People may spit on its masterpieces, but we know its beauty. And it is as dashing as the sun, it is as changing as the ocean, and it is perfectly fitting of the puzzle that we’ve created for our comfort, our mind, and our heart.

Thank you for reading this far! 

Happy reading <3 PS: This was the Spideypool fanfic in case anyone was interested

[tamelee]

Personally I don’t really get people who say they acknowledge Sasuke and Naruto’s romantic bond but still ship Sasuke with a woman… Like, they saw that he was gay (he’s shown to not be attracted to women so he’s not bi) but kinda don’t care?

Actually I don’t really understand the whole shipping culture, or even mainstream fandom culture… I don’t know, I just don’t see the point in just making up content for pre-existing characters while completely destroying what made the characters unique in the first place by ignoring canon entirely (like crack-shipping). I get why people wouldn’t like everything about canon, it’s my case too, but if they don’t like anything about canon… Why are they here in the first place?

Nooo now I sound grumpy. I must be bothering you I’m so sorry 😭😭

Anyway, you’re amazing and I hope you know it 🥰

You don't sound grumpy to me dw 🫶

Well, I don't believe such ships have much to do with Canon either way. And I doubt all of them hate Canon per se, though some change 'Canon' to like Canon, which is funny. "This is my Canon." Yeah, not how it works, but ok- have your Canon your way ofc ┐(￣ヮ￣)┌

Side-note though, I don't think Sasuke even knows who Hinata is? 😆 It's as you say; crack-shipping. (I saw that giant/small-yaoi meme here on Tumblr again. No idea what it's called, and immediately thought; a yes, Sukuna and Levi. Kinda want to draw xD Makes no sense at all.) A lot of Headcanon is derived from personal... ideas/desires/inspiration or self-inserting reasons? (Isn't that exactly what 'x-reader' fics are?) Or even trend-posting. As much as characters are used to tell a story for the original author/creator (they're essentially tools), do fans use them to create new ideas. "Ah yes, we all know this character, let's create something around it simply because I want to." Which is completely fine, right? Look at rare pairs. And to be fair, a lot of content, fictional writing and art aren't even based on canon either. The closest thing through fan-work are Manga analyses or meta's, even panel redraws- stuff like that. People adapt 'canon' into fanwork through various degrees or sometimes ditch it altogether. Nsfw/spice is by default made up and entirely Headcanon :') (Though personality can be depicted in a way ig, through expression/behavior and whatnot.)

I totally get what you mean though, although I guess I'm caught up in fandom-culture now. Personally, I do like characters as 'canon' as possible, but it really depends. For some Animanga I don't really care. I think I ship pretty much all TR/BlueLock-characters for literally no reason, but I wouldn't claim it to be Canon in any way (˚☐˚! )/

However, I don't like it when Naruto and Sasuke's characters are butchered. Made-up context or not. The originals are so special to me and it's the reason why I'm a fan, though I don't mind too much in fics, depending on the story. I find it hard to feel the same when they've practically become someone's OC's with only the same name and design. I can't even read height/age-differences because I can't imagine it xD But anyway, this all includes "official" work made for financial/marketing reasons also- especially those damn novels. Those never have anything to do with canon, nor does it align with it. No matter how passionately people claim otherwise.

I'm only a tiny bit petty about it >< u&me grumpy 🤝 And aahhww I don't actually, you should see me sitting here in giant red Christmas socks and a glittery green sweater that's kinda itchy tbh. I don't really feel anything other than those glitters annoying me every 3 seconds... which reminds me I should change -.- anw thankyou <3

[celestialmantdonna]

Welcome! I'm Mint (26, any pronouns) and here I write Mantis, mostly MCU-based but with some comic + game influences. Indie, semi-selective, mutuals only, 20+ muns only. I do not own Mantis, the Guardians of the Galaxy or any Marvel characters; they all belong to their respective creators, this is fan content. If we are mutuals don't be afraid to reach out to me to plot, suggest new verses, etc.

(I default to using a normal sized font for accessibility, but if you want me to use a small font/you use it yourself because it's not a problem for you, I will!)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* . ───

Rules and guidelines are below the cut. Read before interacting & thank you in advance for reading them!

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* . ───

Links: muse | bio | memes

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* . ───

01. This blog will have SPOILERS! If you want to watch the GotG movies without knowing any spoilers, you might wanna avoid this blog.

02. I do not write with muns under the age of 18, or ideally 20. If I can't find your age somewhere on your blog, I will assume you're under 20 and I will not write with you. I'm sure you write really well but it's just a me thing!

03. Do not reblog my OOC posts/threads you are not involved in. Do not reblog my open starters if we are not mutuals. If you enjoy my writing, I appreciate that! But please, if you're a personal blog, don't reblog anything that is not a gifset/image/fanart. I get that not everyone reads the rules, and sometimes it's an honest mistake. But if you do so deliberately, I will block you. Sorry.

04. I am multi-verse and multi-ship. OC & crossover friendly. I am semi-selective. Mutuals only except for asks.

05. No godmodding. This one's pretty simple. Despite Mantis having the power to control others, she will only use her powers on your muse if your muse agrees or if you and I have discussed it and you are okay with it. Similarly, if your muse can also control others, let's discuss it! Let's see what they can do to Mantis! It's fun to explore their powers, but no actual godmodding.

06. Shipping is fun and we can discuss it but please: no forcing ships and no saying our characters are dating/married without telling me. On a similar note, no saying our characters have a child without discussing it prior. I consider it a form of godmodding, and chances are I'll stop writing with you. Unless I reblog memes about sending in hypothetical kids, don't do that. I'm not saying you cannot do that with your other rp partners if they're okay with that, but don't do so with me.

07. I am me and Mantis is Mantis. Please separate the two, because I separate the muns from their muses. I want to write and create with you, not help you fulfill some sort of fantasy. I understand we can all use our own emotions and life experiences to put ourselves in a specific headspace to write, but if you're living vicariously through your muse, I'm not the partner for you. Nothing against that, I have a friend who writes self-insert, reader-insert stories and one-shots and my friend is an amazing writer. Don't be discouraged, you'll find the right partner!

08. I don't care whether you use icons or not or whether you occasionally commit typos. I do ask you try to use punctuation at least a little because if not, I will read entire sentences without any sort of pause, with no inflection or sense of pacing whatsoever. I really value creativity and characterization and I myself will, probably, have a typo every once in a while, it's all good, just try to keep a bare minimum of grammar.

09. I will not pressure you to reply to threads so please don't pressure me. If I think you actually forgot to reply I might gently remind you and you can do the same with me. This is supposed to be a fun hobby, let's remember that, yeah? I can be forgetful at times. If we're writing together please don't assume I do this because I don't want to write with you. If I'm writing with you it's because I want to and you do as well.

10. No OOC drama. Please. I am here to write and have a good time. In order to interact with me, be constructive when OOC, not destructive. I know we're all human, I understand we all have bad days, it's all good, but don't be a dick. Be respectful, to me and to anyone else I may be writing with. Don't police who I can or cannot write with, because I won't do that to you. I don't want OOC drama. Give me all the drama between muses though!

Some additional info:

Duplicates are welcome.

You can send Anonymous asks, they are welcome and appreciated. They can help me develop headcanons, ideas, etc.

If we're not mutuals and I answer one of your asks, though, don't expect it to become its own thread. I want to believe no one is being direspectful on purpose when it comes to this, but I wouldn't want you to take the time to write that, since I probably won't reply. Never anything personal, I wish I had time to write with everyone, but you know, real life and all that.

I don't write extremely smutty material, it's just a preference of mine since I use writing as a tool of storytelling. If I tell you a story, personally I'm not gonna describe every little thrust/moan/gasp, though if our muses have chemistry and I'm comfortable with you as a mun I'll absolutely be open to writing something more spicy, but mostly fade to black/pillow talk/morning after. It will be tagged ns;fw. Unprompted smutty starters/asks will get you blocked. If you write that with your other rp partners I don't mind though so don't worry about that.

If we're already writing together and you want to try a different dynamic, just reach out! While I do like to build relationships (of any kind) between muses, we can absolutely have more than one verse.

If you've read this far without yawning drop a 🪐 in the ask box (Anonymously or not) and I'll write a little playlist for you with songs I think the Guardians would have on their Zune.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* . ───

[gremoria411]

There is a problem with looking at so many mobile suit designs in that you can wander quite far sometimes. Sometimes to odd places. For instance, I’ve been wanting to watch Gundam Narrative recently, but ended up watching Gundam Twilight Axis instead (they have a similar plot to me). Twilight Axis has the Tristan, a derivative of the Alex. Another derivative of the Alex would be the Full Armour Alex, which appears along with the Striker Custom in Mobile Suit Gundam Katana.

I’m gonna get two things out of the way first: I haven’t finished reading Gundam Katana, because I don’t like Gundam Katana.

Oh, the arts wonderful and I like a lot of the original mechanics, but I absolutely despise the protagonist (the plot’s not great but it’s essentially a blip compared to how much the main character bothers me).

I don’t want this to be just a rant post so I’ll be brief; The Protagonist of Gundam Katana, Ittou Tsurugi, is a prick. In that way that only a brat with a silver spoon in their mouth (on in this case, at their side) can be. He’s handed a super custom ms and a force of followers that follow him absolutely, despite the fact that he has no experience with command (and more to the point, no experience with failure). In addition, he’s also got those bad reader self-insert characteristics (always in the right, excels at everything he strives to do, knows things that he probably shouldn’t at that point in time). Two examples I just want to call out, the first being when he gets mugged at the docks by a group of five. The muggers attempt to justify their behaviour because of the ongoing economic depression and the claim that the Earth Federation spends more on its military than on other things. Ittou defeats them easily (fair enough), but then has the gall to turn around to them and say that they should work harder because of the recession. Ittou, a military brat, heir to his household and with a legion of followers to cater to his every need. The second example is that after fighting Zeon Remnants on the Moon (which is a whole other thing), Ittou has a chance encounter at the flight terminal with none other than Quattro Bajeena, who’s on the moon on business. Now, Quattro’s real identity in Zeta eventually became an open secret within the AEUG until Char’s Dakar Address. However, many members of the AEUG suspect Char’s real identity (Blex), fought against him in the OYW (Bright) or eventually hear enough rumours that they suspect anyway (everyone else). Ittou has never met Char, never seen Char so there is no reason as to why he should be able to recognise someone who fought with a mask throughout the entire One Year War. But he does, because he’s apparently just that good. (As an aside, the whole deification of Char post-OYW as this ace of aces bothers me a little, since he’s only really relevant to the White Base crew and there were plenty of other aces running around. It makes sense post-Dakar and post-Gryps, but prior he should be just another ace).

Anywho, the reason I wanted to talk about Katana is because I like quite a lot of it’s original mechanics. I say original, because it uses a lot of units that were originally from videogames, so I’m only going to be talking about the Striker Custom, Full Armour Striker Custom, Full Armour Alex and GM Striker Custom.

The Striker Custom is the main mobile suit of the series (and yes, I did choose that second picture to show off its weaponry). It’s probably my weakness for close-quarters suits talking, but I really like it. It is essentially a GM Striker with a Gundam Head and new backpack, but as custom units go I find that honestly quite charming. Despite the two pictures shown here it’s actually quite well-armed, starting with the standard Vulcan guns and twin beam sabers. Following this it has a further two beam sabres, snazzier ones with a longer blade, that can be combined into a beam naginata. It is also armed with a set of Knuckle Daggers, mounted on the backpack when not in use, which are essentially a sort of axe-shaped beam blade mounted in the hands (they can be seen in the second picture). It can also be armed with the Spark Knuckle (essentially an electrified, handheld brass knuckle, based on the electrical weaponry Zeon used) and the Burst Knuckle (punch to attach mine, punch again to detonate, because there’s totally no way for that to go wrong). It can also be armed with a 100mm machine gun (or as GBO2 is wont to, a GM II Beam Rifle), but typically isn’t, because Ittou’s a lousy shot. I really like the knuckle daggers - I don’t really think that they’d be more practical than a beam saber (longer reach and all), but they are cool as heck, giving the suit a boxing vibe that I quite enjoy. The Spark and Burst knuckles are typically used sparingly, which helps my opinion of them - the spark knuckle’s lovely, but there isn’t much defence against electric weaponry other than range, so it’s good it doesn’t get overused. The Burst Knuckle…. I don’t dislike it, it just seems horribly impractical. That said, I can only really recall it being used once, so it’s not like I typically remember it. The Striker Custom is also fitted with a “Demon Blade” AI System, a derivative of the EXAM system (*shot*), whiiiiich…… is fine? It’s probably the fact that I stopped reading before it became a major factor (I remember it being introduced, but little else) but I don’t really have a big opinion on it. It makes sense for a close-quarters suit to have it, especially as a trump card to pull out in dire situations. It’s more of the “can be mastered” system than the “WILL mess you up” one though (the original EXAM system was pretty harrowing, as I understand it and the HADES aren’t exactly a nice walk in the park either).

Form and armour wise, it’s pretty good. A large part of that is going to be inherited from the GM striker, yes, but the Striker Custom feels very agile, and light on its feet. It probably is the boxer influence (even the head looks like it’s got a head guard on), but I like it because it feels like a very straightforward design - get close and hit things. Specifically, I like how it feels like a “gundam-ified” version of the GM Striker in the same vein that the Gundam Marine Type “Gundiver” is to the Aqua GM. It really sets your mind going as to what other “upgraded GM’s” there could be (like a Gundam Night Seeker, or Gundam Guard Type). I’m fine with the colours - I typically dislike it if a protagonist suit is “just” white and blue, but in this case it’s actually got a purpose because the main rival suit, the Full Armour Alex, is Red, so it shows the contrasting personalities of their pilots (and it works pretty well with its pink beam weapons). I will admit that I’ve repainted it to Titans Colours in GBO2 though - it’s about the right time period for them to be around (some even show up in the early chapters) and honestly I like imagining the AEUG stealing one (plus, I think it looks really nice).

Now if only it had a better pilot.

It’s upgraded form is the Full Armour Striker Custom, build with spare parts from the Full Armour Alex. Cards on the table, I haven’t read up to the part in the manga where this shows up, so this is purely on the design and it’s weaponry (as seen in GB02). I do like the bulkier look (the original has a nice agility to the design, but I don’t mind the additional weight), however I do think that it’s overarmed. This is a common problem I have with Full Armour upgrades - they just cram a bunch of additional weaponry on for the sake of it. I like heavily armed suits, but just adding bulk to an existing design doesn’t work for me because the end result just ends up looking sluggish. Speaking of those armaments, let’s run down the list, shall we? The Vulcan Guns remain, as per usual. As do the twin beam sabers, though one of them has been moved to the front of the right shoulder. The Knuckle Daggers are now mounted in the…. What is a apparently supposed to be a shield, but looks to me more like a weapons rack on the left arm. There’s an EXAM unit 3-style double beam cannon as it’s primary ranged armament on the right arm - that’s essentially standard armament for FA (Full Armour) Units, so absolutely no issues there. It’s also got a back rocket cannon and chest missile bays, likely modelled after the regular FA Gundam, and rounding out the loadout is a set of missile pods on the legs. In addition to all this, it’s armed with a brand new sword weapon called Fukusaku - a long sword roughly three-fifths the size of the mobile suit itself. I find it to be a textbook case of a mobile suit being overarmed. I can see how - the striker custom brings its close quarters weaponry and the FA Gundam Brings its long-range weaponry, but it just seems to be fighting for space on the suit - the Beam Saber on the front armour (a very dangerous position, given what happens to beam sabers when they’re shot) and the “shield” that’s essentially mounting two especially large beam sabers on the left arm are just the most obvious examples. Fukusaku is odd, because it looks completely unique, and all the sources I can find state that it’s a cold saber - essentially an electric saber, typically used when stealth is required, such as on the Efreet Nacht. Thing is, it looks to be an mobile suit sized Katana, meaning it was forged, but it still has beam effects over the…… Hamon? Of the sword (that wavy bit on katanas that’s formed as the sword cools). Oddities aside, it makes sense that the main suit in “Mobile Suit Gundam Katana” would recieve a fancy katana, but it doesn’t exactly help with the suit having two other paired melee weapons already. I do like the bulk added by the additional armour to the Full Armour Striker Custom, it creates the sense of a slower, more methodical fighting style (“one strong cut” to the striker custom’s barrage of punches), but I think the weapons weigh it down too much, especially since I know it’s going to be used in space. Honestly, I feel like if you took off the Knuckle Daggers and Chest Missile Bays, maybe moved the saber mountings around, it’d look much better. I like the splash of purple added in the paint scheme, but I don’t notice it’s absence much in GBO2. The Full Armour Striker Custom’s design is busier (especially around the chest), so it doesn’t look quite as good in Titan’s colours, but there’s some lovely details on the back (like the leg thrusters) that really pop.

The GM Striker and GM Striker Kai are largely identical, save for the backpack. Indeed, the Striker Custom is essentially a modified GM Striker Kai (with perhaps a little of the blue destiny units sprinkled in). They are armed differently however, with the GM Striker Kai being armed with beam sabers like the ones the Striker Custom has, and the regular GM Striker being armed with a twin beam spear that can convert into a scythe. I like the regular GM Striker, I think it’s an excellent up-armoured version of the GM, with the twin beam spear being an appropriately imposing melee weapon for it. I very much like the colours as well, with a lovely green, yellow and blue-grey scheme. The blue visor also draws attention nicely to the head. The GM Striker Kai is the space-use version, having the backpack of the Striker Custom in addition to its weaponry. Overall, I think it’s a nice GM unit with the additional armour doing a lot to distinguish it from the pack.

Lastly, the Full Armour Alex. I found it quite difficult to find a decent picture of the Version seen in Gundam Katana. The Full Armour Alex is…. a little of an odd one for me, because though I know it’s just differing artist interpretations, I tend to consider the original (Green and White, right) and the version seen in Gundam Katana (Red, Left) as separate designs (for the most part). I’ll go over the one seen in Gundam Katana first. It’s piloted by Kotetsu, a cyber-Newtype of True Federal in the series (True Federal have a vested interest in having as many newtypes on their side as possible, but they don’t seem to be going for the inhuman experimentation that the Titans did.) who functions as an early, personal foe for Ittou, here to drop subtle hints about the organisation and provide an actual challenge. The Full Armour Alex is essentially a brute - it’s got the strength and power to easily match most anything else in one-on-one combat, and functions as True Federal’s one-man clean-up crew. I think it’s used well in the series - it’s a FA unit, with lots of weaponry that’s geared towards ranged combat - a natural counter to the Striker Custom, which focuses on close-quarters. It spends much of its initial appearance holding Ittou back by sheer volume of fire alone - he’s forced to do little else but dodge. But it’s meaty firepower never allows it to feel unthreatening.

Design-wise….. it’s just fine. I like the red colour scheme in the context of their pilots - Kotetsu’s far more emotion-driven than Ittou, so it makes sense for their contrasting personalities. But in the context of red mobile suits in Gundam….. it doesn’t work. Red is a signifier of Char, or something related to Char (or a char clone), but the Full Armour Alex is neither. I have been seeing some “regular” rivals using it as of late (see the Pixy (LA), but in those cases it just comes off as forced. It’s just red because it’s a rival and rivals are red. The form and body’s fine - it’s a good example of the artist’s style and the muted colours really mean your attention’s drawn to the knees, skirt, head and gun. As a full armour unit, it doesn’t get many dynamic melee shots, so it’s imposing and weighty stature helps it look imposing, particularly the back rocket cannon and it’s targeting camera.

However, I must confess I completely prefer the Original (Green and White) design, as featured in Mobile Suit Gundam 0080 MSV. It just feels so much sleeker and faster, selling that the NT-1 is an improvement over the original Gundam. The green and white colour scheme is still eye catching, clearly drawing a distinction between the original and its additional parts, while helping to sell just how protective the armour would be, since the parts of the original Alex peeking through help emphasise just how beefed-up it is. Furthermore, you can easily believe that there’s space in the armour for the chest missile bays, without significantly compromising its protection. It’s only got two other integrated weapons - the back rocket cannon and the twin beam cannon, but it feels like an appropriate amount of additional firepower. It feels significant, since they’re both clearly visible on the design and the grey plays off the rest of the colour scheme - there’s only a few other small details, like the collar and “ribs”. The Full Armour Alex does retain its built-in arm gatlings, but they cannot be used since the armour covers them. I think the fact that the armour doesn’t cover the leg thrusters, and has dedicated gaps for the AMBAC system are why it feels so much sleeker to me - the Full Armour Alex was intended to be a backup plan for the Chobham Armour, and looking at it it might have even been more agile. I also very much like the head - I assume it was just artist interpretation, or perhaps the NT-1’s design hadn’t been finalised when it was made, but the yellow eyes, red forehead jewel and sleeker face really appeal to me, while helping it have its own identity other than “just the Alex, but bigger”. It’s just really rather neat.

[humanitysong]

Who is your favorite OC?

man I wrote so many,,, I guess it also depends what you see as an OC? would writing a mythological character be an OC since rpers develop them much further than the legend ever could? what about characters like player characters in MMOs? most of them don't have a backstory & you can go crazy with 'em. so I'll just cheat & take one or two from each category ,,, ( rest under cut bcs haha sorry u made me babble about my OCs & it became a stupidly long ramble ).

purely original oc: gwyn .

looks cute. maybe isn't actually that cute. used to be an army general centuries ago & was known for being pretty good at it. the kind of person who kept losses on his side to a minimum but maximized them for the people he fought. at least that used to be kiinda the idea behind him, I really wanna re-visit that OC & re-write stuff. but I will always have a soft spot for him.

OC based on legends : dinadan & cassandra

dinadan from arthurian legends because my boy deserved soso much better. I really think the poor sod would have done better never becoming a knight even if he was potentially the only voice of reason bcs "uh how about we don't murder each other???" . & ofc cassandra of troy. so I am fairly sure I mentioned it once on this blog but I am a librarian, those "re-telling of myths" books ( think soa etc ) are super popular rn so i read some from time to time to be able to recommend them to readers. none of them have ever nailed cassandra. i dunno why esp women seem to love to write her as incredibly 'bitchy'?? so ya know. sometimes you gotta take matters into your own hands. not to say my portrayal is amazing but legit people write her as if she is?? a bad person for disliking the greeks?? ( ya know the army that kept troy under siege for 10 years & killed pretty much her entire family ?? )

oc based on 'insert your character here' media : amaya

look I'll be real, story wise my wol isn't that great. basic backstory to fit into the world's setting. people have done much more & better with their wols. but if I may toot my own horn ................. their design is at least really nice. I will never have a prettier OC & I think whatever my brain did back then that's when my OC brain peaked. won't ever happen again, sorry.

munday questions ( no longer accepting ) // @reddragon-cowboy .

[glorified-red]

red, how does one characterize a character for an x reader fics

Ah yes, sit down on my comfy couch and have a fresh cup of tea, Red will now offer sacred advice.

✨however tf you want✨

Theres a lot of stress nowadays about making a character too OOC but i find that you have to write them OOC in order to be able to write them in character. I read some of my old stuff and oh my god that is not Tim at all. But it took all that to know why the things I wrote were OOC.

Plus, fics are for you, at least they should be. So you get to write out your ideas and if people like it, people like it. Simple as that.

But since people seem to think I write characters really well, heres what I tend to do:

Find a single moment in canon, analyze tf out of it, and go ham.

No literally, thats all I do with Damian and somehow he's my most popular character. I read the Robin run, found a single panel about him having internal struggles, and just ran with it. I'm writing an entire series simply because i read too far into the Robin Run and convinced myself that Damian hates his eyes.

Im diving into Jon and when I tell you ive only read one comic of his 😂 But that one comic is about sensory overload and OH BOY is that all I needed to know. Know theres a million different scenarios I could insert Jon into without ever actually knowing what he's like.

I also indulge in a loottttt of fanon content too because most fanfic writers deep dive into characters and their fics are basically an analysis on them. That, and a quick google search always helps with that too, especially when it comes to what drives a character and how they've changed.

I have like, maybe three fics per characters that I base my entire perception of Damian and Tim off of, I wish I was joking. I liked the writer's interpretation of them so I stole it :))

When it comes to actually writing, I usually come up with an idea and figure out which character would be the coolest in that scenario and why.

I came up with an idea that needed a character that came from a different city as the reader, so Jon was the first to come to mind. Have I written for him?? Absolutely not. Do I have friends who have? Hell yea, so I went to them and read wayyyy too many of their fics wayyy too many times. I have annotations on their stuff.

So if you have an idea and it feels OOC, try to pinpoint the exact moment that feels OOC and ask why. I find that my dialogue is OOC so I usually rephrase it over and over again until I'm happy with it.

And if you dont want to do that, you can always rely on narration. Especially when writing for introverted characters like Tim and Damian, narration is the best way to make your OOC content feel less OOC because the narration backs up why they said the things they said or why they did the things they did.

Damian could compliment a stranger in a fic. It's super random and super OOC, but if you narrate it the right way, it would make sense for him. Aka, manipulation, using it as a distraction, etc etc.

Butttt if you're asking about readers oh boy i have so much to say about writing readers. Let me know if thats what you were actually asking about because thats a wholllle other rant.

[hug-your-face]

This is really good worldbuilding advice. Why do I say that and why am I, who is NOT a fiction writer, even voicing an opinion on worldbuilding advice?

Because one thing I actually DO know a bit or two about is modeling and simulation. And whether Derin calls it that or not, this is using modeling and simulation as a worldbuilding tool:

Choose or create a model (How Human-Based Societies Work)

Choose target conditions (stability)

Set up simulation parameters and initial conditions (your Weird Scenario)

Run the simulation using your model (use your imagination: would this society last generations?)

Observe the result (is it stable?); adjust the initial conditions as needed

This is what I see lacking in so much modern fiction, and why a Weird Idea is just not enough. If your own worldbuilding process has either

Neglected to run the simulation

OR if it's based on

An inconsistent model, or

A model known only to you and not shared with us the reader

...then you are not gonna suspend my disbelief, and I don’t care how fucking "cozy," "badass," "original," or other insert-your-selling-point-here your story is. You have written a personal fantasy, not a story to be read by others.

You don’t need to create an entirely new model of behavior, or of physics, or of economics, or whatever that flies in the face of known models. You can just use existing models -- you don't need to do TOO much research for this, even Wikipedia can give you the basics of biological selection or physics or economics or societal stability -- and then you set up your weird initial conditions.

This is how you get both originality and verisimilitude.

You CAN create a whole new model if you really want to! What if trust and aggression between people followed no internal logic and was just random? What if the cause and effect of your magic system was different from any type of cause and effect that we readers might have encountered in our lives?

Some fantasy does this really well. But it's going to be a lot more work for you to ensure that your model is

Internally consistent, and

NOT similar enough to an existing model of real life that readers unconsciously apply THAT model instead.

And as Derin repeatedly demonstrates in his own work, you can get really unusual results out of existing models just by setting up your Weird initial conditions and then following them through to their logical conclusion.

TLDR: If you can't make your own internally-consistent model for something in your world, store-bought is fine.

Hi Derin! Sorry if this has been asked before, but I'm amazed by the vast array of cultures and gender norms in TTO:U. How did you come up with all of it?

I just thought "hey wouldn't it be funny if there was a little guy" and then made them, and thought "hey what norms would exist in a culture under these conditions" and then made those.

In all seriousness, most of my worldbuilding comes down to tearing down assumptions. Brennans exist because I fucking hate gender and I'm sick of seeing the gender binary or "gender binary Plus Nonbinary Extra People (who still live in a world that assumes a gender binary)" as some immutable natural law that all societies will forever cling to, and I wanted to make a society that was harder for readers to inevitably sort into a binary as they always, always fucking do. (Partial success; I have seen some absolutely rancid takes on the TTOU gender ternary that make me want to break my computer.) The array of different cultural family structures exist because those are different ways that societies can be built on smaller units. The Arboreae and the two space elevators and the Khemin exist because that is a potential response to a critical climate crisis.

On top of that, most of my ideas are stolen. I once read a short story about people who lived under the ocean on an alien planet and spent most of their time just cruising around the ocean in big bubble-like biological submersibles and that was their job, because their submersibles cleaned the water by feeding on things in it; they were employed to be part of the ecosystem. The Khemin, wandering about the ocean as both environmental monitors and trash-gatherers, were inspired by this; from there, I just thought on what sort of family structure and traditions such a group would develop for a stable society. When I was a teeny tiny child I saw a guy on Ripley's Believe It Or Not who was trying to build a self-sustaining floating island to sail around the world on. Absolute disaster of a plan, man knew shit about ecology or farming, but a bit later on I got really into swamps for awhile and started thinking of using plant roots as water filtration systems and, with an eventual biotechnology degree, multiple years hyperfixating on ecology and evolution, and touch of Magic Future Genetic Engineering, that eventually became the Arboreae. The social structure of Hylara is somewhat inspired by CJ Cherryh's azi, particularly the way that Florian and Catlan are raised in Cyteen. The Hylarans are very much not azi (the azi being slaves brainwashed from birth via hypnosis) but the way they are raised fed into building a society batch-raised by robots and each other with no natural family unit. You can just steal concepts from the real world or from scifi and build them into your own thing it's fine.

Anthropologically speaking, the golden feature of any social structure or cultural practice is *stability*. This is the one feature upon which everything is judged. Just or unjust, productive or unproductive, authoritarian or free, structured or unstructured, when developing a society your key thing to worry about is "is this stable? Would a society survive for multiple generations on this norm?" and if your Weird Idea isn't stable, either ditch it or -- far more interesting -- adjust it and your parameters until it is. Different norms will be stable in different environments and built on different histories -- Khemin and Hylaran norms are not interchangeable because of the environments, tech, political climate and reproductive methods the two cultures have. But if it's stable, you can throw in whatever weird shit you want.

[twst-discourse-bot]

Good afternoon,

I seem to have possibly fallen victim to Ray/Morgan/Yuuna with these latest requests I’ve received while I was out of town. By how it looks, it may be her but I’m not entirely sure, it could be a copycat who wishes to tether themselves to her problematic ways and continue her message while she scurried off with her tail tucked between her legs.

Firstly, I’m not racist, never in my life have I ever been nor will I ever stoop so unbelievably low. I do have POC family who I hold very dear to me so seeing this thrown at me hurts deeply, troll or not. I only payment lock OC based stories because they are listed as “commissions”. With providing me payment, the requester will be temporarily handing me the rights to their OC and their OCs likeness, as I do not own their OC, nor would I ever attempt to do so, this is method is best.

If this is from Ray, I do not know, but after reading your evidence file here on Tumblr I would not entirely chuck that idea out the metaphorical window.

I also unfortunately received this message here…

As many of my readers are very well aware, I primarily focus on Y/N reader inserts in the gender neutral form, I do receive requests for male and female y/n inserts but not as frequently as gn. Last I checked, Yuu, or rather, us, is who we make of them, they are us as we are them, so naturally we think what we want. That’s the magic of the game, it’s our story regardless of gender and pronoun identity, should such really matter? We can always write ourselves in however we so please so this particular complaint holds no ground.

I truly hope this pest of a person ceases this madness and moves on, she is likely young and in need of guidance but that does not excuse her actions as she has harmed many. I hope she learns her lesson.

Please keep safe, well, and in good health! I thank you for bringing this case to our attention, it means a lot to see people looking out for the fandoms we love.

- Windblume

Windblume, I am absolutely fucking livid for you right now. I'm so sorry this is happening to you again.

Whoever this person is, Ray or not, they're a total moron. I understand not wanting to answer their bullshit, but my anger issues could never. Listen to me carefully: you are not in the wrong here.

I don't even know where to start with everything in these screenshots it's just so bizarre I'm shaking. First of all, imagine thinking you're being oppressed because another person's fanfiction isn't catered to you or other women. As if women and AFABs don't have enough real problems right now, THIS is what they think sexism is?

Did they crawl out of a worm hole leading to another dimension or something? The TWST MC has always been gender neutral and intended as a self-insert for the player, no matter the gender or race. This isn't an argument, they're a blank slate. Just because you think the MC is a girl doesn't make it true or a valid point to force on other people. Gross.

Also, do they think that people are REQUIRED to gift them writings about their OCs? Do they think that the only OCs in the fandom are black or characters of color? I'm so stunned, there's zero logic there. And another thing, minors in fandom are not "underprivileged" because grown adults and older fans don't want to coddle them and give them everything they demand.

You are absolutely within your rights to only take OC requests as commissions. An author doesn't owe you jack shit just because you want it. Write your own damn story if you want it so bad. Do the hard work like everyone else, you repugnant little troll.

Wind, if you do plan on answering them, don't be nice. Don't even be respectful. The lost the right to your basic respect when they disrespected you. Tell them to fuck off and leave you alone. Call them every nasty name under the sun. They don't deserve your patience or understanding.

On a related note, I believe this is the perfect time to use all of those other screenshots you sent to me a while back, I think they need to be seen:

Absolutely disgusting. Thank you for coming to me with all of these.

Stay strong, Windblume. I'm sorry these ugly souls keep coming after you like this.

[alluringjae]

au cours de l’été - jjh

⤑ translation: over the summer

⤑ summary: this is a story of an exhausted painter who needed a breather from the hectic city life. so aside from moving to the countryside, the needed air in your lungs also came in the form of a person. this summer meant for pure relaxation, perhaps your heart may dive into him too.

⤑ pairing: jaehyun x female reader

⤑ word count: 15.2k (so much for saying that i’ll be writing shorter stories)

⤑ genre: fluff, romance, smut | author!jaehyun, painter!reader, strangers to lovers!au, 50s-60s!au, summer love in france!au

⤑ warnings: me inserting some french phrases because I want to practice (feel free to correct me if I made mistakes, i’ll appreciate them), fictional interpretations of real-life people, explicit language, jaehyun being such a romantic pls im in tears, mentions and scenes of burnout (the worst)

⤑ playlist: everybody loves somebody by dean martin | c’est si bon by eartha kitt | it’s always you by chet baker | les yeux ouverts by emilie-claire barlow | a sunday kind of love by etta james | the most beautiful thing by bruno major | try again by jaehyun and d.ear (duh) | free love (dream edit) by honne | petite fleur by jill barber | plus je t’embrasse by blossom dearie | so this is love by ilene woods and mike douglas

⤑ author’s note: this was an idea that just came to me after pinterest kept recommending me poetic beauty/try again jaehyun, so here we are! i intended to write less than 5k words but sometimes plans don’t go as planned once you really invest in the story yet i’m really happy how this turned out!

the romantic exhilaration in my bones are off the charts because this is jaehyun we’re talking about lol enjoy!

⤑ masterlist

⤑ leave me some feedback, constructive criticism, or hellos!

3 juin 1957

The city life overstimulated your entire system, losing your brainpower and inspiration. Another exhibition that’ll feature your works with other influential painters was happening at the end of the year, and you had nothing prepared so far. You’ve crashed to the deep end of creative fatigue.

So you needed to get away again; somewhere quieter and surrounded by nature.

That’s why you ended up in the countryside down south, somewhere within Provence. It’s purely just for the summer, but extensions were okay as long you get back at least a month before the show. Filing that leave of absence at the studio you worked at was worth it.

You rented an apartment overlooking the marketplace, where the heart of the village was. After arranging things from your boxes and luggage the entire day, you found out that you lacked in the food department.  

So the succeeding day, the entire morning was spent on grocery shopping downstairs then stocking them inside your refrigerator, freezer, and pantry. Right after changing out of your pajamas into a flowy floral dress and sandals, you decided to bike to the bakery that locals suggested. A must-go place for newcomers, they all raved.

“Café des Étoiles Perdues.” (Café of Lost Stars.)

The clear chimes of the bell resounded through the small, cottage-like lobby as you entered inside. An old woman, whom you assumed was the owner, welcomed you openly.

“Oh la la, vous êtes belle! Vous vous appelez (Y/N), la nouvelle venue, n'est-ce pas?” (Oh la la, you’re beautiful. Your name is (Y/N), the newcomer, right?)

She complimented, making you shyly mutter your answer. Wiping off the flour from her apron, she introduced herself kindly.

“Je m’appelle Camille. Mes spécialités sont les macarons pisctaches et des croissants avec des amandes. Autre chose que tu aimes?” (I’m Camille. My specialties are the pistachio macarons and croissants with almonds. Is there anything else you like?)

“J'aime tout ce que vous suggères, Madame.” (I’d like anything that you suggest, Madame.)

A younger man, who went by Jaemin, was a part-timer barista who asked for your coffee order. As he directed you to the best seat of the café, which was outside overlooking the garden of blooming sunflowers, you pulled out your sketch pad so you could capture this dreamy view. It was nothing like you’ve ever seen in your life.

You’ve decided on a theme already for your exhibit thanks to your conversations with locals yesterday, which was related to freedom. After being chained to cities for so-called better living and financial standards, it’s actually how your inspiration to create squeezed the life out of you like a lemon. Although it was fun at first to see those tourist spots, it eventually got tiring.

Another matchstick to graze intensity through your bones was what you prayed for.

While you’re engaged in a rough sketch of the scenery, the dandy presence of a young man entered the café with his books. White shirt, red trousers with a matching beret, he sported freckles on his pale face. Despite visiting his favorite café numerously, Camille was overjoyed to see him and his serene smiles.

“Jaehyun! What brings you here?”

“Bonjour, Madame! I’m starving for your croissants because I ran out back home.”

“Not to worry! I’ll pack up some so you’re on your way.” She lightened him up like one of her kids, taking one of the bigger paper bags.

“No rush though, Madame. I’ll be reading and working here for a bit here.” Jaehyun affirmed, bringing it out his wallet and called out for Jaemin.

“Un café crème, s’il vous plait.” (One cup of cappuccino, please.)

Jaehyun’s usual chair was by the large window, overseeing the wide garden planted by the citizens of the village way before he was born. It was places like this he missed after moving to the city for his education and work’s sake. 

That’s the thing when you’re coming from a rich family; you don’t have much of say with what your parents order you to do. However, his recent request to stay in his childhood home (or mansion) again was fulfilled because he couldn’t search for what he needed in the cities anymore.

Jaehyun was a sucker for romance; an old romantic others would say. A lot of women mistook his kindness as flirting on many occasions, but ironically he just wasn’t looking for anyone yet. 

Starting as a novelist in the said genre based on real-life stories of people he met in Paris, Barcelona, London, and more, his stories were popular hits especially to young adults who aspire to find love one day.

However, traveling to the known places no longer felt fun as he got older. The stories he gathered were very similar, just in different languages. It took an enthusiastic dinner with his family, specifically his only older sister Krystal retelling fond stories from their younger years to get the idea of moving back for a bit. So consumed with the city life, he wanted to see things from another perspective.

What was the difference between a love story formed in the countryside than in the city?

It’s been a month since he arrived, but he didn’t hurry himself to do his research. He’s been reading books in his family library, revisiting monumental places, exploring around the village, and reconnecting with old friends as if he never left. 

Readjusting to his former life would make writing easier when he’s motivated enough to do it again. Besides, his books were profiting well enough to his taste; good enough for the next 10 years according to his personal accountant, Kim Jungwoo.

Jaehyun resumed reading this book his mother recommended him before he left. Entitled “Réessaye”, which was about a young man who reunites with his childhood sweetheart after his arranged marriage failed. After what she put her through, he’s hesitant whether to try again or let her go.

Jaehyun enjoyed reading books with realistic outlooks on love because he found them more meaningful, enlightening how exactly it makes you feel and do. Even if he enjoyed reading sappy, fairytale-like stories from time to time, he always returned to the real ones as they only displayed the truth.

That love isn’t always rainbows and sunshine, but something that can also break you especially if you go after the wrong person. This kind of mindset was how he toiled on his stories, which gained him a status outside of his unavoidable labels such as “the only striking son of the Jeong family” or “Valentine Boy”.

He diligently browsed through the climax, where the main male character confessed all his constrained emotions to his sweetheart. But it was until Jaemin pressed the bag of croissants in front of his face after placing down his childhood friend’s drink to disturb his peace.

“Reading again?” He taunted, snatching his book away and throwing the bag on Jaehyun’s lap. “When are you writing that book already? Everyone is practically dying for you to release something new again!”

Jaehyun flatly shook his head, drinking his coffee quietly. It’s not the first time anyone asked (or pressured) him about his next release, and it’s the last thing he wanted to think about. “Not in the mood right now, Jaemin. Now off to work before Madame Camille scolds you again.”

“You’re just stalling because you have nothing to write, don’t you?” Jaemin cunningly expressed, raising a brow. He’s known to catch onto the people’s bs easily; the last person you’d want to say your secrets too and Jaehyun realized too late. Though lucky for him, Jaemin shut the topic down right away so he wouldn’t pop a vein.

“Sais-tu de la nouvelle venue dans le village, d'ailleurs?” (Do you know about the newcomer in the village, by the way?)

“Une nouvelle venue?” (A newcomer?)

Being stuck at his mansion recently, news about village affairs were now late to him. Jaemin’s finger discreetly pointed outside the window, pertaining to a young woman sat outside painting her view in front of her.

That would be you, shading all the flowers in bright colors.

Seeing a new face amazed Jaehyun, especially when she was almost someone right out of a book. In a neat bun with white daisies printed in her dress, she crossed her legs whilst continuing her movements. She bit her lower lip, frustrated over an accidental smudge she made and trying to fix it by blending it with another color. When she accomplished it, she swapped brushes. A thinner one, to outline the shapes of the flower. Her lips curved to a smile after finishing another one perfectly with the rest.

“Jaehyun?”

Jaemin snapped his fingers to his distracted friend, zoning out the window. Still something he hasn’t stop doing, he pondered. With a final snap, Jaehyun broke away from falling hard from his abstract. Jaemin calculated the problem so quickly, analyzing his friend breezily like his medical school requirements.

“Elle est splendide, n'est-ce pas?” (She’s gorgeous, right?)

“Elle ressemble à une personne décente.” (She looks like a decent person.)

Jaehyun pushed it aside, flipping back to the page where he stopped reading. Before Jaemin responded, the door chimed open again to alarm him that a new customer came in. He excused himself to his friend, warning him that this wasn’t the last time he’ll talk about the newcomer too.

Jaehyun nodded along, not taking his friend’s cheeky words so seriously. However, the final result you attempted to create tickled his curiosity, so he slyly peeked from his book to the window.

You’ve freed your hair down, victorious to have started your collection this early in your break. A fantastic start, you let the paint dry first and munch on the croissant that served as your reward. However, you ‘re quick to notice a manly figure glancing through the window. From the side, his brown eyes appeared lively even if his entire face was hidden by the book.

Réessaye by Mark Lee; he must be a romantic. Every person in your studio read it, excluding yourself. Painfully beautiful, they’d summarize it.

Daring to meet more people, you locked eye contact with him. He didn’t expect it, almost flipping from his chair. Bashfully, you waved him a hello to somewhat break the ice. However, it broke his composure, and suddenly, he scurried off with his things from the café.

Now, you got quite worried. You checked your tiny mirror if he saw anything unpleasant with you, but you’d say you look relatively fine. Oh, maybe you could redeem yourself the next time you saw him. After bidding goodbye to Camille and Jaemin, the latter chased after you when you prepared yourself on your bike.

“By any chance, did you say hi to a guy with brown eyes and a red beret?”

“Well, more like I waved at him, then he zoomed out. Did I do something wrong?” You questioned with concern, putting your hands on the handles.

“That’s my friend, who’s quite reserved with strangers. I’m sorry on his behalf.”

“Nah, it’s fine.” You brushed it off politely. “See you again soon, Jaemin!”

Peddling away, letting the cool breeze fan you, your mind reverted its thoughts to that strange man. Maybe you’ll give it some time; you had a lot of it.

“Shucks, he was pretty cute.”

12 juin 1957

The world must really be on your side with these good decisions because you crossed paths with the strange man again in the café a week later. But instead of running away, he asked nicely if he could sit across your free chair in front of your table outside. It was a Saturday, and the place was packed.

“Joignez-moi, s’il vous plait.” (Join me, please.)

You insisted, giving yourself time to subtly observe his physique a lot more. Freckles dotted under his eyes like a constellation, bushy eyebrows, pink cheeks to match his pale complexion, and wearing a fuzzy knit sweater that meshed well with his green beret. He had some sort of necklace too; there was a heart pendant.

“Vous êtes une artiste.” (You’re an artist.) The small wooden palette of paint beside your small sketch pad was exposed, finding it as a great icebreaker.

“Une peintre, spécifiquement. Franchement, les visuels ici sont trés captivants qu'à Paris.” (A painter, to be specific. Frankly, the visuals here are more captivating than in Paris.)

“Je suis d’accord,” (I agree,) Jaehyun leaned against his chair, taking a better look at you with the remaining light from the descending sun.

“Oh, vous êtes comme moi. J’habite à Paris aussi.” (Oh, you’re like me. I live in Paris too.)

“Bon, je suis née à Londres. Puis, j’ai déménagé où je voulais en Europe depuis j'avais 18 ans. Mais oui, j’habite définitivement à Paris maintenant.” (Well, I was born in London then moved wherever I wanted in Europe for inspiration since I was 18. But yes, I live permanently in Paris now.)

You clarified, beginning to enjoy his comforting company. Initiating conversations with people you’re not acquainted with wasn’t in your range of skills, though he didn’t have an intimidating vibe. He looked too youthful to act like that.

“Je m’appelle (Y/N), d'ailleurs.” (I’m (Y/N), by the way.) You stuck out your hand as a sign of respect, which he enthusiastically obliged.

“Salut, (Y/N). Je m’appelle Jaehyun.” [Hi, (Y/N). I’m Jaehyun.]

He kissed it in a gentleman fashion, applying the manners he’s been taught since he was a child. Should you have been flustered, but no.  It’s been a long time since anyone greeted you like that, specifically back home.

Throughout your talk, you learned more about who he was, his job, and what his life in the countryside is like. He was an author of romance novels, yet you’ve never heard about him prior. Heavily prioritizing your work, you don’t keep up with the new releases or trends at all. Though after mentioning his last name, it piqued your interest.

“Jeong? As in the business, Jeong Tea Inc.?”

“Correct.”

His family was one of the most affluent families in Parisian society. Old money immigrants from South Korea, they brought their tea business to France and it boomed successfully. You’re quite sure you’ve seen his parents in past exhibits, but never did you approach them because you were a rookie then. But he reassured you that it was fine, and to just treat him like you’d treat your friends. Plus, it came to your knowledge that he was the same age as you too.

He opened up how this village was where he lived his childhood, so he asked his parents if he could hand over their mansion for a while for rest. It then shocked both of you at how identical your reasons were for staying in the countryside.

“I’m burnt out from the city, so I’m trying to regain my spirit here hopefully. Besides, I needed a change of scenery after living there for 3 years. My longest stay yet outside of London!”

“I need new ideas for my books. The cities don’t charm me anymore, so I returned here for peace and quiet. Maybe let these ideas come to me rather than me going after them.”

From a bigger lens, people would conclude your interaction as a sight of two artists who passionately talk about their art. But to you, you’d interpret it as two relaxed, young adults in their twenties who simply wanted to run away from the pressures of their art and enjoy the summer as every young adult should.

Not cooped up in the studio or office, but innocently waltzing around with your youth while it’s still there.

début de juillet 1957

“Dépêche-toi, (Y/N)!” [Hurry up, (Y/N)!]

Jaehyun yelled at your open balcony from downstairs, parking his mini car beside your bike. He planned on taking you somewhere a little farther this time; to absolutely feel like one of the locals.

The countryside urged you to wear more dresses and flat shoes, so you took out a turquoise dress with a white scarf to wrap on top of your head. Like your relaxed fit, your mindset too was calm. Upon meeting him, he wore his round spectacles with a red knit sweater over a white turtleneck long-sleeved top. His fingers were adorned with silver rings, then around his neck was a thin black ribbon. He curled some of his hair again, a style you really liked of his.

You can’t lie, but this man could pull any trend or style and still look extra pretty.

Out of all the locals you’ve befriended in your stay, Jaehyun was always your companion. He took you to varying places that those locals don’t visit nor tourists acknowledge in their reviews for the past few weeks. For someone who hasn’t been in the village for a long time, his memory didn’t disappoint. His childhood was only filled with cheerful moments.

Today, he was taking you to a peaceful district of shops in the farther part of the village. It’s where he’d buy sweets, journals, and accessories with his mother, Krystal, and one of his housemaids every other weekend.

All the stores there were currently bombarded with blooming flowers along their alley, bringing more enticement to those who were roaming around. There was so much life here; the head waiter of one restaurant smiling at every passing customer, one florist handing a free flower to anyone who asks, and a young lady showcasing her jewelry collection to a bunch of women who looked like tourists.

“Cette librairie vendent des livres enveloppés dans du papier. Ma mère m'a offerte l'un d'eux pour mon anniversaire tous les ans comme une surprise.” (This bookstore sells books wrapped in paper. My mother gifted me one of them on my birthday every year as a surprise.)

He trained his attention at a rustic shop with open wooden windows giving a glimpse of their shelves.

“Avez-vous fini les lisant?” (Have you finished reading them?)

“Du début à la fin.” (From cover to cover.)

He took you to this rooftop restaurant overlooking the entire plaza. Since he didn’t arrange a reservation yet didn’t get rejected, he must know the owner. Especially how a lot of the staff gave casual hellos and high fives.

Speaking of the owner, he walked out of his kitchen to introduce himself to you. He went by the name Moon Taeil, another one of Jaehyun’s childhood friends whom he used to play at his house whenever his parents came along.

Gobbling up in the appetizing food Taeil prepared beforehand, Jaehyun brought up your painting exhibition again. He loved hearing artists talk about their works, wanting to know more about their driven mindset and what their imagination is like. After all, it does vary for everyone.

“So far,” You poked your fork through the chicken, taking a bite of it. “I’ve produced 3 paintings. The garden of flowers outside Café des Étoiles Perdues, the kids playing hopscotch in the alley, and the peach tree outside your house.”

“Woah, you’re on a roll.” Jaehyun clapped across you, pouring you another glass of water. He recalled the nights you ranted not having any clue what to do for the exhibit. Then after taking you to more places, he’s rewarded to see you be creatively active again. “How many artworks do you left to make?”

“Around 3-4 left. I have ideas already, but I’m still brainstorming.” You internally rejoiced, loving how much progress you’ve made. “How about you, Jaehyun? How’s your progress?”

Unlike you, Jaehyun still felt stuck. Although he did find couples around the village, none of them intrigued him as much as his past stories. But he won’t give up easily; that’s not in his work ethic.

“Still searching, but I’ll get there.”

Recently, you got ahold of some of Jaehyun’s books from him personally since they weren’t sold in the village. You wanted to understand how he became so well known outside the labels people put him under. Reading his first novel entitled “Des Papillons” (Butterflies), it was about a couple separated during World War II without contact or knowledge about their well-being. Yet whenever they saw butterflies on the day they parted, they took it as a sign that the other was alive wherever they were.

You’re always hanging on the cliff when the scenes revert back and forth to the main male lead getting stuck in intense war scenarios, rooting for him to get out alive each time. In the end, it took 7 years before they were reunited and wed.

Jaehyun had a wonderful way with his words and descriptions, managing to enwrap you in as if you’re also a character in the book. Like how you rooted for that male lead, you’re rooting for him to find his spark again.

Following this uplifting conversation, Jaehyun finally took to your greatly anticipated spot. It was the main viewpoint of Gordes, one of the most beautiful hilltop villages in the country. The sunset was about to hit, and the lights from the city across you slowly turned on like a bunch of dominos.

As you marveled at its aesthetics, Jaehyun leaned against the hood of his car. He sensed how in awe you were, more than you ever were in the city he assumed. So used to the city that being surrounded with nature became foreign to you.

He took out his polaroid camera from his trunk and captured a photo of you from behind. The shutter sounds were obvious, turning your back at the commotion. Jaehyun fanned the freshly printed photo to dry, giving a mischievous smile.

“What can I say? While you’re fawning over the view, mine was more enamoring.”

Although Jaehyun felt overwhelmed the first time he locked eyes with you, he can’t resist the power of his developing feelings for you. The more time he took you around, the more his heart found different details about you to admire. After listening to all those love stories in the past, the people he spoke to shared how there will be some distinct moment where your heart decides who they’re longing for.

That exact view of you by the cliff, he already knew.

He’s infatuated by you.

“Tu es très ringard, Jaehyun.” (You’re so cheesy, Jaehyun.) You scoffed sassily, with a hand on your waist.

“Un gentleman ne ment jamais, (Y/N). Allez, il fait nuit maintenant.” [A gentleman never lies, (Y/N). Come on, it’s night already.]

He cleverly responded, grabbing his car keys from his pocket. The trip back to the village was energizing, putting down the roof of his car to relish the chill breeze of the night weather. You even raised your arms in the air, losing your scarf even from the speed Jaehyun went at!

The two of you belted along to the songs on the radio when the fields were the only ones surrounding you, no neighbors to shout at your rambunctiousness.

The late-night hours drew by so quickly almost like dinner with more of Jaehyun’s friends didn’t happen. Arriving at the front doors of your apartment complex, Jaehyun raced over to your side to open your door. Always maintained proper observation of manners, you appreciated that side of him. Rarely anyone in Paris that you’ve encountered treated you that way because you were a foreigner.

“Bonsoir, (Y/N).” [Goodnight, (Y/N).]

“Bonsoir, Jaehyun. Quand est-ce que je te revois?” (Goodnight, Jaehyun. When can I see you again?)

“Demain et après-demain. Appelle-moi quand tu es libre.” (Tomorrow, and the day after that. Just give me a call when you’re free.)

With a short wave, you entered your building and marched up to the stairs. A good day only meant being tired to the core, ready to crash and fall in your soft bed. Opening your wide windows to let more of the cool breeze in, your eyes easily caught Jaehyun’s classy car still there. As for the owner, he didn’t move an inch from his leaning position.

“Rentre à la maison, Jaehyun! C’est tard!” (Go home, Jaehyun! It’s late!) You shrieked, peeking side to side to make sure none of the neighbors scold you.

Jaehyun laughed wholeheartedly, not budging at all. “La nuit ne fait que commencer, ma chérie.” (The night has just begun, my darling.)

“Comment tu m'as appelé?” (What did you call me?)

Either your ears were fooling you or he addressed you by a divine pet name. The gasp you swallowed, as your entire body tingled with exhilaration. Your mind would simply disregard it like his former teasing words, but your heart begged to differ.

Rather than responding with words, Jaehyun’s voice serenaded you with a wondrous song, C’est Si Bon by Eartha Kitt, that played on the radio earlier. Out of the blue, a random guitar accompaniment followed his baritone vocals.

“En voyant notre mine ravie,”

Against the railing of your wired balcony, your body shifted forward to watch him better.

“Les passants dans la rue, nous envient,”

Your hand perched on your cheek, admiring his talent.

“C'est si bon de guetter dans ses yeux,”

It was like a lullaby, and here you were drowning in its peacefulness. Sensing the passion he gives off in his singing, your heart couldn’t refrain the strings inside from being swayed and tugged.

This was your moment of realization: that you too were smitten.

“Un espoir merveilleux, qui donne le frisson…”

À la mi-juillet de 1957

“Hello, nature!” You greeted brightly as your legs raced the huge garden in his manor. It was the first time he invited you over, too lazy to go out of the city. His social battery needed a recharge for the weekend, so a picnic within his home would do the trick. Additionally, it was an excuse to bring you over after the numerous times you’ve begged him to.

Jaehyun merely shook his head, enjoying the rush of childlike fun in your veins while you squealed and grazed your hands through the flowers.

He carried a wooden basket full of treats his family maids cooked, taking his time to venture through the rows of flowers. They were growing healthily and phenomenally these days, sometimes riding his bike to personally water them since he became busy with writing again. Lately, he found inspiration again, and so he wrote day and night to set them free.

“Voila!” You yanked out a sunflower, sniffing it a little. “Come on, Jaehyun! Pick up a few for our lunch!”

He followed your order, picking out some he found ideal. But just for fun, he put down the basket and carried you from behind out of the blue. You tried kicking him away, but his muscular arms can’t compete with your soft ones.

“What are you doing?”

“You said to pick up a flower, so I did. The prettiest of them all.”

His flirtatious words were never serious, yet you took it as a compliment. That’s how high your confidence is. Only we define our own worth, not others. The two of you chatted more about your lives until the first rain of the season poured down, chilling down from the raging heat. None of you had an umbrella; the weather was too unpredictable.

Deciding to just run for it, he gave you the wooden basket to protect yourself whilst he used the blanket you’ve sat on. Running with laughter to return to his mansion in the muddy dirt, the cool drops shivered your figure yet felt fantastic.

If you were in the city, you’d panic because it’d mess your appearance and your boss would be infuriated by your unprofessionalism. But in the countryside, it didn’t matter at all. The condition of the rain wasn’t budging to improve, getting stronger by the minute. His entire house even lost power, his housemaids having to bring candles to his bedroom and your assigned one once night dawned.

It was hopeless to return home for you, plus it’s dangerous to drive in in the dark, narrow streets too. Jaehyun handed you some of his fresh clothes so you’d be free from flinching from cold dress sticking to your body.

“Get dressed and some sleep, (Y/N).”

Nodding, you excused yourself to find the bathroom. You’d assume it’d be easy, but this was your first time in his house; a mansion even. Doors from left to right, long corridors that seemed never-ending, no maids were within the vicinity whom you can ask for guidance.

Resorting to return to Jaehyun’s chamber for help, you were taken aback by what your eyes laid on. In front of his full mirror, he discarded his now-dried shirt. Even with the dim lighting, you could make out that he was fit by the transparent view of his abdomen. Peeping like this was wrong, yet you couldn’t turn away just yet. The heat in your cheeks was inevitable, finding composure in such an unholy sight.

Though a gear in you suddenly twisted; a gear that straightened your nerves. You’re taking a bold move on the chessboard of your feelings. Wholly opening his bedroom door again, you leisurely sauntered inside without warning.

“Oh, (Y/N)! Ne peux pas trouver la salle de bain?” (Oh, (Y/N)! Can’t find the bathroom?)

Unbothered as he stood shirtless, you on the other hand silently dropped his clothes on the floor. Holding intense eye contact, your fingers graciously unzipped the side of your dress. Inch by inch, the tension built up like the strong tiny flames lit on the candles around you two. Joining the pile of clothes, all that remained were your white lace undergarments. Unplanned for the get-go, it’s the ideal set for your earlier outfit at the picnic.

“Je me suis perdue, mais je pense avoir trouvé quelque chose de mieux.” (I got lost, but I think I found something better.)

Your fingers grazed your arm up to your collarbones, faking your naivety. From your lust-filled stare, the glint in Jaehyun’s eyes darkened. He gulped at the revealing sight of you, brushing his hair back to restrain himself.

None of you could utter a single word, only the vivacious rain being the only sounds ringing around you. Thus, you allowed your actions to pursue precisely what you desired to do.

Taking baby steps towards him to test the waters, he met you right in the center and closed the leftover space. His hands cradled your face, whilst yours clung to his chest. His lips tasted like red wine, watching him pour in a glass for himself earlier. He did offer, yet you declined.

Your tongue darted his lower lip, gaining access after. Sensing the edge of his bed, you plopped yourself down the cushion. His knee urged your legs to widen, letting his body slide in. From your face, his fingers lowered to the back of your bra, snapping the clasps open.

“It takes skill to accomplish that in one try, Jaehyun.”

“I lived in Paris too, ma chérie. You out of all people would understand and have the experience.”

His palms massaged your freed breasts, throwing your head back even more to his pillows as his lips ravaged down from your stomach until the fabric of your not-so pure panties.

“Call me that again, please.”

“Ma chérie, seras-tu mienne?” (My darling, will you be mine?) He kissed and licked the tiny ribbon in front repeatedly, where your now-swollen clit laid. It electrified your bones, pulling on to his ruffled hair.

“Tu peux m'avoir.” (You can have me.)

Sex in the form of one-night stands were all you’ve invested; upcoming artists like you weren’t capable to maintain long-term relationships. Les plans à trois even if you’re extra freaky or drunk from the afterparties of your events. All that these occurrences had in common were not seeing those men ever again after sneaking out of their apartments in the morning.

This time, it’s different.

When they said that doing the deed with someone you’re romantically entangled with was more special, they didn’t bluff. You could plan bits of your life, but it can sometimes change aspects of it when you least expect it. Sometimes for the best or the worst, but right now, it went beyond your expectations.

It’s rewarding that the man you’ve slowly fallen for within your stay returned your affections.

Around late 3 am that night, your brain jolted with artistic ideas that awoken your sonorous rest. There are no hopes of sleeping them off because they tend to bother you for hours until you do something about it. But you’re already so cozy having Jaehyun’s arms around you, skin to skin under the duvet. His lips daunted right above your forehead, recalling his endless kisses there that helped you fall asleep.

Well, these ideas don’t work themselves unless you do. Untangling him tactfully, you stepped out of the blanket and wore one of his long white shirts he gave you earlier before pulling out your sketchpad and palette of oil paints.

Luckily, there was still one available candle to use as the rest have melted indefinitely. You slid the matchstick again to the sand surface, boring a flame from the friction which you placed on top of the wick.

All your ideas that night leaned towards one thing, or person rather: Jaehyun.

You spent a few minutes retracing how he vividly looked at the picnic, leaning back from the chair of his work desk. His outfit of a turquoise turtleneck underneath a white button-top with trousers matching the said turtleneck looked good together, how his ears tingled red after you complimented his newfound inspiration for his book, and the prominent veins in his arms when he rolled his sleeves due to the heat.

The thin brush you held defined the shape of his face, then paying attention to the messy strands of his hair. Stroking in a circular way to outline his eyelids, a hoarse grunt disturbed the peaceful silence.

“Get back in bed, ma chérie.” His eyes drowsily opened, lying on his side. The moment he no longer felt your warmth, he worried something happened. Instead, you’re working late at night after quite a rough yet romantic night.

“Shush,” You shunned him down with your index finger. “Give me a few more minutes.”

“Perhaps, are you painting me?” He hunched from the covers. “Your eyes looking back and forth would never lie to me, would they?”

“Maybe…” You teased, batting your eyes at him without any risky intentions. Or not?

He deeply chuckled, sluggishly removing himself under the covers. In his pure nudity, he advanced himself towards you. You shrieked, covering yourself with your free hand.

“Jaehyun, stay back! I told you I’ll be there soon!”

Not listening, he carried your bridal style, making you drop your precious palette to the fur rug. Laying you carefully, he popped each button open. By the sight of his cock hardening again, you knew you were in for another round with him.

“Wet again, ma chérie? Oh, this will be fun.”

Fin de juillet 1957

So this kind of summer romance concept that everyone fantasized about… it became your present.

Together you’d stroll in the smaller streets and immerse yourselves in the unique culture of the village. Whenever anyone saw you together, holding hands, biking, or what-not, they’d praise in the name of love for bringing you both together. A romance like yours in the countryside was a lively sight.

Remember how extensions were a possibility if your search for inspiration wasn’t found? Well, it’s not a question that you’d make one, except inspiration found you instead. And he had one arm around you as he slow danced with you in the open grounds of the village, listening to the live band covering song classics.

In particular, Chet Baker. He was Jaehyun’s favorite artist at the moment.

There was an ongoing week-long festival dedicated to summer, giving more plants their bloom and spreading gratitude to the hardworking people. Especially the students, off on their break.

The faint radiance from the post lights as Jaehyun swayed you around, making you laugh as he tried to mumble the lyrics of the song. All those glasses of wine he tried earlier with you from the bartender offering it for free had its effects, and you weren’t off the hook from them either.

Blisters started to form from your ankles, adjusting to the new pair of heels Jaehyun gave (or insisted to buy) you a while ago after staring at them like lasers. You’ve always provided things for yourself that being spoiled by someone else felt weird to you.

“If there’s anything you want me to buy for you, just tell me.”

“How can I buy you if you’re already mine?”

His smooth talk often made you punch his shoulder, but it’s just a mechanism to hide the exhilaration.

Under each other’s spells in your dance, you laid your head on Jaehyun’s chest. Feeling the strong beat of his heart, you were reminded of how much life he’s filled with. And you became a part of it, in the same way he crossed yours.

Jaehyun’s lips sank to the top of your head, pecking it affectionately. The first-ever summer where he wasn’t stuck at his desk working or drinking his life away with his rich friends in their Parisian homes, it couldn’t get better than this.

“Oiii! Flirtez ailleurs!” (Oiii! Flirt somewhere else!) The distinct voice of Jaemin, handing out pastries to passersby, shouted at the both of you, making you flip your middle finger at him.

“Trouve une copine d’abord, d’accord?!” (Find a girlfriend first, alright?!) You shouted back jokingly, almost falling due to the ache of your feet. Your immodest behavior was censored by Jaehyun’s large palms, not wanting the kids around to see it. Whispering closely to your ear,

“Tu es ivre. Laisse-moi te ramener chez toi.” (You’re drunk. Let me take you home.)

You changed back into your sandals as Jaehyun led you through the different alleys. Your vision was too hazy to navigate, so he had one arm wrapped around your shoulders. The weather grew cold too, shivering your bones so he draped you in his blazer.

“Wait,” You stopped, making him do the same. But before he could ask for your reason, your hands yanked him by his suspenders and your legs walked backward to reach the brick wall. Standing in his 5’11 glory, you were overpowered.

Yet your lips captured his effortlessly, raising to your toes to press yourself closer to him. He moved fast, one arm hugging your waist while the other hoisted your leg up. Tangling around his waist, the urge to move your hips against his crotch couldn’t be contained any longer.

Everyone was probably still out at this time or sleeping. The sloppy sounds you’ve produced were beyond suitable for any audience. Not to mention, the nasty words Jaehyun’s pretty mouth spoke in your ears desired you to fall to your knees.

“Not afraid of getting caught, ma chérie? You want me to ruin you right here, right now?”

“God, Jaehyun,” Your hands tugged his belt forward, the friction it gave to your core twitched the naughty side out of you. “Do it, please.”

The idea of public sex thrilled your mind into overdrive, yet you’ve never done it. In Paris, a city where several people started to know your name, you didn’t need a scandal to be plastered in your resume yet.

Jaehyun himself included, and still opted not to give it to you.

“Another time, ma chérie. Your apartment, now.”

The moment you unlocked your apartment door, Jaehyun was far from gentle like in the mansion. Ripping you out of your frilly dress didn’t take long, so was unbuttoning his trousers down to the floor.

On your knees, his hand gave you a makeshift ponytail as your tongue flicked the slit of his cock. Then slowly taking him inch by inch on your mouth, you’d let out a loud pop when you needed to breathe. Your hands fondling his balls, he groaned from the edge of your bed and tightened his hold on you. Tears formulated in your eyes as you got to swallow him whole, uncontrollably bobbing your head.

He felt like putty when he released, your throat taking the salty base. You hastily unhooked your bra in front of him when suddenly, his hand flicked on the fabric of your panties, cueing you to stop your motion.

“Keep them on when you ride me.”

Straddling on his lap, his head laid against the headboard of his bed. His arms roaming around your back to stabilize you, your fingers pushed your panties to the side as you pushed yourself down his protected length. Your moans became shaky. Up and down, you bounced while bracing on his shoulders.

Against his ear, your moans were harmonious. His hips moved against your beat, hitting your g-spot like the sexual ace he is. His thumb rubbing your clit, you shuttered your eyes at the impending high approaching you like a bus.

“I’m close.” You choked out, the overstimulation overwhelming your nerves.

“Fuck, me too.” He grunted, slapping your butt that made you shriek.

Soon enough, everything hit you both all at once. The knot snapped, and so did your body falling on his chest after a single scream. Panting, Jaehyun pecked on your temple as his cock softened up. Once you returned to your senses, you lifted yourself from his length, laying bare beside him.

His eyes started to fall, but before they did, he muttered huskily. “Je t’aime, (Y/N).”

It was the first time he’s said those words in the way they meant, and he’s more than certain that it’s what he felt with you. Sure, it started as mutual infatuation, but now, it can’t leave. Not on his watch.

Love was a concept unfamiliar to you, but Jaehyun slowly taught you what it was and how it felt like. Books and films may give sneak peeks, but to personally give and receive it back was made possible by him.

From this moment on, you could conclude that yes, you reciprocated it.

“Je t’aime aussi, Jaehyun.”

16 octobre 1957

Autumn made its way to the countryside.

The leaves switched into red-brown shades, the weather in the south was warmer, and the wine harvest was highly anticipated. Jaehyun’s camera was a common item in your outings, taking as many photos as he could so the two of you had something to look back on.

Planned and candid, his range was wide. These were moments that proved that your youth was as happy as you wished it to be. You wouldn’t trade it for anything else.

Painting in his mansion was a regular thing, having new canvases prepared at his patio. There were so many items that amused you there like you could base your entire collection on his home. It’s not like Jaehyun could argue; it meant more time with you whenever you came over.

“Jaehyun, if you smudge paint on me, so help me Go-” He refused to listen to your “threats”, smearing black paint on your cheek.

“You were saying?” He cockily pestered, showcasing his paint-filled fingers. You dipped one of your brushes into the new paint and chased after him without hesitation. The entire evening became a paint war, a laugh fit even after seeing your reflections in the mirror. But before you could clean yourself, Jaehyun’s camera was by your face and he pressed the button.

“Still breathtaking.”

But the middle of the season arrived, that’s where your planned extension you’ve reached its end. The exhibit was next month, getting calls from your boss regarding your return and the paintings you’ll present. You informed her that you already had them mailed to your studio way back, so there’s nothing much to worry about.

All your bags were packed in the private car Jaehyun rented. Here, you’re bidding your goodbyes to every friend you’ve made outside the doors of your apartment complex, saving your last words with Jaehyun.

The night before, he stayed over and helped you pack your last items in luggage bags. He even brought extra clothes for you so you wouldn’t work extra. You’ve talked it out the whole evening through what happens next to ease your worries. In your bed, he opened the wide windows and pulled you under the sheets.

“Write to me.”

“Call me when you’re free, or whenever you feel like it.”

Leaning against the railing of the stairs, watched the sorrow in your face over this parting. He sensed how bittersweet everything was, but he wouldn’t change anything about it. He’s positive that your story won’t end here, not right now.

Sauntering to him, you sighed whilst taking your bag he held the whole time from him. His touch was tighter as the two of you hugged tenderly, nuzzling his head on your shoulder. The scent of his citrus cologne that implanted in your brain felt comforting, despite the uncertainty of everything between you.

You hinted a minty taste from the menthol candies from his home as his lips brushed yours, colliding it timely. He waited when everyone left, relishing these last seconds.

Stepping inside the vehicle, you waved your summer love farewell one more time before the driver hit the pedal. Your eyes couldn’t stray away from looking back, the distance between him and your former apartment widening. Only when he was no longer in the frame, you shifted your focus back in front.

Your fingers fiddled with the charm bracelet he gifted you from the market. It was custom-made by a jeweler who was great friends with his mother in his younger years. There were two pendants chained on it: a paintbrush and the sun.

“A paintbrush to remind you of your passion, and the sun to remind you of the summer we first met.”

The man was like one of his romance books, in human form. He knew how to catch your breath effortlessly.

Your stay, for now, may have concluded, but there was always next summer. And the ones after that. The village felt like a second home, one you can’t neglect like the other places you’ve lived. Then having Jaehyun here, the more reasons to return.

Undoubtedly the best vacation you’ve ever been in your adult years, one that didn’t sacrifice for your art so you could compete with other artists. The weight on your chest poofed into thin air, and you felt ready for what the next steps as a painter were.

Appreciating the greenery you passed by, you peeked over the side mirror of the car only to find Jaehyun quickly biking in your direction.

Now, what was he up to?

You instantly requested the driver to slow down his pace, rolling down the window of the car. Not caring about the strong winds, “You fool, what are you doing?!”

Although he trusted your last words, he had the greed to see your face again. It would be a long time until he’ll see you in person again. So he pedaled as fast he could to still reach you. Oh, the things you do when you’re in love.

“Mon cœur bat la chamade pour toi, (Y/N)!” [My heart beats loudly for you, (Y/N)!]

You giggled at his silliness, throwing out flying kisses.

“Je reviendrai bientôt, Jaehyun!” (I’ll come back soon, Jaehyun!)

21 octobre 1957

Only your friends at the studio gave you a warm welcome back, receiving comments like “get back to work” from your first encounter with your boss. Popping a champagne glass open after work hours on the rooftop of your studio, they interrogated you with all the questions they could think of.

“So this village in Provence…. was it beautiful as the tourists said?” Ten, who moved from his home in Thailand to Paris at a young age, expressed his curiosity whilst leaning against the railing overlooking the Eiffel Tower.

“Beautiful is an understatement, Ten. I miss it dearly!” You heaved a sigh, twirling your glass.

“So this inspiration you were looking for…” Amélie, your dear friend since your university days, created some tension as she prolonged her last word. Playfulness twinkled in her eyes, crossing her legs. “Was a person involved by any chance?”

For a moment, your throat almost gagged on the sizzling alcohol going down.

“What do you mean?” You acted clueless, pouring your now empty glass with more booze. But the moment Ten gave you the troublesome look coordinating with Amélie, you already knew you wouldn’t hear the end of it. These two were such gossips in and out of the studio.

Ten took the seat across you on the table and leaked all his pent-up information.

“So you know Seo Youngho, the only son of the Seo family. Rich, socialite, a total hotshot… yeah, all that jazz.” He dived in, seeing you nod over knowing that man. Someone in the past you’ve slept with, but that’s another story. “Well, Amelie and I attended one of his parties at his large penthouse. He had his usual crowd there; Kim Doyoung, Lee Taeyong, Nakamoto Yuta, and Lee Minhyung. But fun fact: there’s another member in that friend group who doesn’t go to these kinds of events.”

“Here’s where it gets interesting,” Amélie excitedly took off like the pipelette (chatterbox) she is. “Youngho, who was talking to us for a bit, asked where you’ve run off. Poor him, he must’ve missed you in his bed but anyway! We told him that you went down south somewhere in Provence for a break. Oddly enough, he mentioned how the mentioned member moved back there for the same reason.”

Ten and Amélie gave each other another frisky look, merely to piss you off. So predictable of them.

“Get to the point please!” You screeched.

“Jeong Jaehyun, ever heard of him?” Amélie imitated your tone of voice. “I mean, you should since you made a whole painting of him.”

“H-How,” Speechless, that’s what you were. Ten went on a fit of giggles, signaling the build-up of his intoxication.

“Youngho visited the studio to find a specific painting for his home, and we helped him in choosing. Then when your deliveries of paintings arrived that day and were unwrapped, the look on his face when he saw Jaehyun’s painting was priceless. Things started to add up, especially when he told us that he called up Jaehyun prior, he said that Jaehyun was seeing a girl during his stay there.”

“A young, burnt-out painter from Paris, to be specific.”

They’ve put you on the edge of the cliff, and it was too close to call it a coincidence. Of all things to be revealed, this had to be the first.

“Well, I was waiting for another time to tell you guys about him though.”

Their gasps of joy could give you guys a noise complaint by the neighbors, telling all about your escapades of him and you. During it, the more you missed seeing him daily either on his bike or his car. It was stuck in your routine, but now it’s reverted to your old one.

Could the next summer come any faster?

14 février 1958

Perhaps your newest collection at the Louvre was your most successful one yet.

Entitled “Inspirez, Expirez” (Breathe In, Breathe Out), your sceneries during your stay in the village varied. An old couple slow dancing under the night sky, and the quiet district of shops Jaehyun took you, those were some of your last additions.

A multitude of positive reviews on the newspapers and art magazines came in, commending on taking on a fresher, brighter outlook for a change whilst finding your spark again. As fulfilling it was, what you longed the most was the one responsible for it.

Lately, it’s been tough to contact him. His maids always answered the calls, informing you that he was busy with work or family matters. It’s so rare for him to act like this. Whatever it was, it wasn’t grand or serious hopefully.

Back to your collection, tonight was the last night of it. Just in time for Valentine’s day, where numerous socialite lovers embarked on this event, but you’re more fixated that it was also Jaehyun’s birthday. A boy full of love born on the day dedicated for it, things made more sense. In case, you’ve sent your birthday wishes to him through letter and passing the message to one of his maids. Even on his special day, he hasn’t reached out to you.

But to momentarily forget about that, there was a closing ceremony held for this exhibit with the other artists involved, and it was your turn to give your final remarks. More esteemed socialites and journalists were present, which didn’t halt your nerves the slightest. You were a professional after all, holding pride in your craft as you stood in front of the microphone wearing your new favorite custom-made gown.

There are perks when you have close friends in the fashion industry, specifically Kim “Key” Kibum from the House of Key. After defending him from a disrespectful client when you were picking up a dress for your boss during your internship years, not only did you earn his respect, but an invite to his shows and first claiming of new items from his collections. Dining in expensive restaurants in the metro was a plus, catching up on your lives. Sometimes calling each other out for your sexcapades too.

Speaking of him, he was in the crowd that night, ordering every photographer to take photos of your gorgeous self in one of his dresses. Or in your opinion, bribing some by how he stuffed a few thick stacks of Euro bills down their pockets.

Only one of it ever made. A dark green satin v-neck off-the-shoulder gown, where diamonds adorned your neck and ears and white stilettos kept your perfect balance. Also courtesy of Key.

Because it’s the winter season, he gifted you a limited edition white fur coat every socialite tried getting their hands on. Your hair was styled in a bun, emphasizing your dark tinted lips from this new lipstick Amelie insisted you buy.

Most people would get the first impression that you were one of the socialites, a child from one of the affluent families even. But you were a lot more remarkable than that, having inborn talent in the arts that you specialized over your youth and rising to the top without any parental help.

“Thank you to everyone for their endless support towards the magnificent collections of each artist present. As for mine, I am grateful to rechannel my creative side by taking a break. Rather than romanticizing overworking our bones to the core, there’s nothing wrong with taking a step back from the pressure. Being alive is a blessing, realizing further how our youth won’t stay with us forever. Being away from the boisterous cities, I found relaxation in the countryside of Provence.”

Your lips quirked into a grin as every single memory during that time reeled in your head like a movie. “The beauty of Provence cannot be simply put in words. The muses I’ve encountered were more than lovely, especially the man behind the Poetic Rose. With that, I sincerely thank everyone from my bottom of my heart and I hope to continue to support me in the years to come.”

The applause roared once you stepped down the platform, shaking hands with every esteemed guest with more gratitude as they praised you. These days, socializing with them was a lot easier. You’ve even taken more initiative to greet people first before they do, conversing with them easily about anything.

Key definitely noticed that as you toured him around your section, holding his nth glass of wine for the night.

“You, Madame (Y/N), transformed into a social butterfly.” He nudged your shoulder, smirking once he got a better view of his favorite painting from you. “I guess that’s the thing when you’re in love.”

“I beg your pardon?”

With this free hand, he motioned it up and down at the painting in front of you. “The Poetic Rose is none other than the youngest son of the Jeong family, whom I’ve met through his older sister, Krystal.”

“Am I really the only one who doesn’t know him?!” You stressed, jokingly. Key was elated to capture you in his trap, the changes of your personality too evident in his eyes. Figuring it out that it was love took a while, but being acquainted with Krystal, she’s the one who told him that her younger brother was in love with a painter in Provence. Do the math.

“I’ve met him through his older sister, one of my highly favored clients. He’s not much of a socialite like her, so I don’t really blame you for that.”

Searching for a waiter to refill your wine glasses, a surprise emerged the both of you.

“Madame Krystal, you’re absolutely stunning.”  Key complimented her, giving the engaged heiress of Jeong Tea Inc. kisses on the cheek as respect. Her recent engagement to Kim Donghyun, her childhood sweetheart and also the heir of Kim Couture, was the talk of the town.

They arrived at the event together, drawing the attention of everyone in the room earlier. Now, he was speaking to a few influential socialites he made a deal with this week about the art collections present.

“Key, you never fail to look fantastic,” She remarked positively, poking his necktie before placing her undivided attention on you. “So you must be (Y/N) (Y/L/N). You’re beyond bewildering in that gown.”

“Flattered to hear that, Madame Krystal. Such a pleasure to meet you.”

The three of you chatted as if you were the only people there. From art, passion, and love, pride filled in your chest when you toured your collection. It was like walking down memory lane for her, adding out how she used to climb the peach tree with her younger brother during their childhood. Once her eyes laid on Poetic Rose, she took her time admiring it.

“My younger brother grew up well. That’s all I could ever hope for as his only older sister.” She paused, noticing how silent you became when you stared at the painting along with her. She observed the passion lit in your eyes, yet there was longing behind it by the way your lips pouted briefly. “You must really love him, do you?”

“I do, truly. After meeting him, not only was I boosted with so much ideas, but my heart embraced him for what and who he is in this universe.” You professed confidently, earning an approving smile from Krystal.

“If that’s how you feel, why not tell him that yourself?”

Her fingers gestured you to turn around. Stood in a grey suit with his brown hair slicked back, it was like seeing a completely new person. A handsome one though. His fashion in the countryside heavily differed from his fashion in the cities. So sophisticated and refined, he looked like a prince straight out of a fairytale.

Your fairytale.

“Jaehyun.”

It’s like everything stopped once he sprinted towards you, pulling you off your feet for a snug hug. Your arms threw themselves on his neck by instinct, not wasting a single second in his grasp. Your nose inhaled the woody scent of his cologne, something more formal than his usual fruity scent.

The smell of aftershave in his jaw couldn’t go ignored either, assuming that he must have had plans to go out tonight. Nonetheless, you squealed as if you were back in Provence, giggling at his boldness. Once he put you down, neither of you could get your hands off each other.

“What are you doing here? You didn’t tell me you’d be in Paris!” Clutching your waist, you gazed at him with doe-like eyes, instilling confusion.

“J’ai voulu te surprendre, my chérie.” (I wanted to surprise you, my darling.)

He chuckled, pushing some straying strands of your hair behind your ear. His eyes evoked so much endearment towards this elegant look you prepared, making his heart race as if he were in the gardens of his manor again.

Hearing his petname for you again attacked your heart every time no matter how much time passed, he lifted your chin high. Jaehyun urged himself to kiss you senseless right there, leaning lower. And yes, you anticipated it by how your eyes instantly closed.

Only if it weren’t for Krystal to clear her throat, obviously ruining the mood. Flinching away from your sensual lover, you rubbed the nape of your neck. Towards an heiress like her, it must’ve been unprofessional.

“Couldn’t you at least wait until I left, younger brother?” Her fingers flicked Jaehyun’s forehead, a teasing trick they used to do as kids. Even if she was a lot shorter now, it didn’t mean the impact was weak. He cursed under his breath, covering his forehead.

Stifling your laughter was a failure, crinkling your eyes to unleash your emotions. So this is what their sibling dynamic was like?

“Now excuse me, older sister. You didn’t tell me you were visiting the exhibit after my birthday dinner with our parents?” He crossed his arms, exchanging a judgmental look. For his sake, he wanted to maintain his pride. “All you said after dinner was that you were going straight home with your fiancé after all the alcohol mother gave you because it made you lightheaded.”

“Well, you know Key and his persuasiveness. He insisted I attend this event last minute because all the collections were amazing.” She explained, shedding a subtle glance at you. “Plus, it’s an excuse to finally meet this lovely girl you raved so much through your letters.”

Jaehyun kept his family life private, so this piece of information was new to you. The unpredicted way the fluttering feeling drew in your stomach, all you could do was smile from the flattery.

“He spoke about me to you?”

“More than speak, my dear. He practically professed his love for you, asking me advice on how to court a girl, make them smile, etcetera. You’re the first girl he’s been this affectionate with, and I completely understand now.” She patted your shoulder, hopeful. She had such a strong older sister vibe, reminding you of your older siblings back home. “You’re a clever, talented woman. I look forward to seeing you more often.”

As you nodded in approval, she turned towards her brother with her recurring teasing look. “Yah, Jaehyun. You better take care of her. If she ever sheds a tear because of you, I’m hunting you down in the gardens.”

“Harsh of you, Krystal.” He planted his hand on his chest, feigning pain. “But no worries. Having you and mother around me kept me well-mannered towards women growing up.”

Playfulness aside, Krystal felt honored towards her younger brother. Men these days maintained their sexist beliefs and rudeness, especially those who doubted her high position in the family business once her father stepped down. Nowadays, it’s men like Jaehyun who could really challenge the patriarchy and make women pursue a lot more than being limited as a housewife.

“I’ll keep that in mind. Now please excuse me, I’ll be on my way.”

Krystal waltzed her way out without tripping from her slight intoxication, which Jaehyun worried about earlier. But anyway, that left him alone with you. Filled with so many questions, you didn’t know where to start.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming to Paris? Why didn’t you acknowledge my birthday wishes to you? Why aren’t you answering my calls and letters?” You blurted without wasting a breath, weren’t trying to come off as needy, but it became peculiar when he was contacting you like usual.

You pushed off thinking of the worst scenarios, not wanting it to ruin your drive and your emotions either. Yet you trusted Jaehyun enough to know he wasn’t the type of person either.

“Okay slow down, ma chérie.” His hands maneuvered for you to stop for a bit. “Ask me one by one and I’ll give you a solid answer for each while we roam around.”

He arrived in Paris last week, which was initially for work. Then his birthday clashing was a coincidence. It would be too lonely to go home and celebrate his special day alone, so he extended. But again, it’s his work that caused his abrupt contact.

When you were too busy delving into the success of recovering your inspiration, he also found his spur to write again too. Day and night, his mind kept him tedious with an endless trail of thoughts and words. Overall, he finalized it then brought the end product to the same publishing house where his books in the past went through.

In fact, he decided to publish them specifically today on his birthday. The only day in his itinerary he planned, where after publishing, he’d hang out with his friends, have dinner with his family then run off to reunite with you.

“I didn’t intend to make you feel like a second choice, so please forgive me for that, ma chérie.”

“All is forgiven, Jaehyun.” You held both his hands, kissing them tenderly out of habit. “I’m overjoyed that you rekindled your creative side again.”

You were so understanding and empathetic, and Jaehyun aimed to act that way too. He learned so much from you as his friend before being his lover. Quickly enough, you’re both back to his portrait in the center. Like a critic, he narrowed his eyes and scrunched his nose. Tapping his chin with his finger,

“This man in Poetic Rose, he’s quite dashing.” He commented with conceit, walking closer to it to view it better. “His freckles are on point, his dimples and dazzling eyes too. Why exactly is he described as a Poetic Rose?”

“Well sir,” You stood beside him, imitating his actions. “This man here always spoke so eloquently, like he had a very poetic approach on life. He reminded me also of a rose by his rosy tinted cheeks and his beauty. He was alluring inside and out.”

“Is he your favorite muse?”

“I never quoted him as a muse because he’s more than that. Muses can be replaced once they no longer serve purpose towards the artist. Though with him, he’s the never-ending flame that I want to keep for the rest of time."

You held on to his hand, interlocking your fingers with his. The apparent reddening of his ears proved that he was flustered, yet you spoke no lies.

“Joyeux anniversaire, ma flamme.” (Happy birthday, my flame.)

“Merci beaucoup, ma chérie.” (Thank you, my darling.)

Something about his new release piqued your attention so you brought it up again.

“So tell me about your new book.”

“Let me show you instead.” Inside the blazer, there was an inner pocket that sealed a small hardbound book. Taking it out, he handed it over to you. “This is your copy.”

The cover of the book had an illustration of two young adults running down the fields under the bright sun, with the title written in cursive and placed in the center.

“L’Été de 1957.” (The Summer of 1957.)

Like a child who received a new gift in the mail, you flipped the book open. Seeing the table of contents and credits to other important people involved in the process, there was a detailed dedication right before the starting chapter. It’s an unexpected page, noticing that he never put anything like this in his last works.

“Pour ma chérie, qui a peint les couleurs manquantes de ma vie.” (For my darling, who painted the missing colors of my life.)

Although Jaehyun planned to write about the couples he met in the countryside, he chose to change his perspective. Instead, he based this new book on your summer romance, installing more original characters who made your romance blossom more.

“I was once so engaged in listening to people’s love stories, hung up on what they felt.” He expounded, pacing around the floor whilst you skimmed through the pages. There were black and white photos from your adventures too to wrap the reader further in the story.

“While I was struggling to find the next story, I realized late that my story with you was a perfect choice. When I fell in love with you, it’s like I didn’t have to fret anymore about anything. Everything slowly yet surely aligned into place for me. Like how we found inspiration in each other.”

A poetic speaker meant having a poetic, wise mind. You kept an open mind whenever Jaehyun shared his thoughts on life with you, an intimate time that didn’t require using your bodies. Whether you were stargazing or drinking wine by his patio, his soulful personality never changed.

“So I recapped every single memory we had and compiled them,” He resumed, taking a closer step towards yours. His warm hands grasped your waist again, catching a glimpse of your astonished face. Mostly, towards your lips that he missed feeling against his.

“This book expressed my own take on love this time, the one I want to grow in.”

You’d care less if you dropped the book and your coat right there, your major desire to kiss him again was driving your senses to the edge of a cliff. Nothing could’ve braced yourself the second you fervently collided your lips with his. It didn’t feel like you were in this exhibit, but somewhere back in his mansion engulfed in each other’s presence.

Your legs almost melted by your daring move, if it weren’t for Jaehyun’s arm moving upwards to your back to stabilize you more. Your body tingled with goosebumps due to his relaxing fingers all over your body. His tongue caved in your lips, and you couldn’t ban its access.

Such an explicit sight, it felt forbidden as you were inches away from the public crowd. Yet it was the least of your worries if they made a big fuss over it. Jaehyun was here again with you, and that was more valuable to you. He savored every trace of your touches, taking his delicate time with you. No past birthday could defeat this, especially when it’s the first one to celebrate with you. The first of many.

As much you wanted to keep this up for hours, your lungs started feeling constricted of air so your lips timidly let go. Though your hands couldn’t, your overwhelmed eyes couldn’t shift away from the heart-stopping view of your lover. Wherein even after such a fearless session, his eyes fused with love and need with his plumper lips.

“Everything about Provence, especially you, that’s the life I want.” You confessed this concealed secret that’s revolved your head for a while now. Yet its certainty was true.

“Are you sure, ma chérie? What about work?” As an artist, he believed you should stay where everything is accessible. Yet as his woman, he wanted you to follow your heart. Jaehyun didn’t want you to choose or struggle.

“I’ve grown out from the idea that the city life was the only life meant of an artist like me.” You replied, confident enough to discuss it after deep thought. “Cities like Paris hold exciting, vigorous flames that will have you clinging on to them. But then, they’ll eventually die the longer you stay. You get burned in the process too. However, I stand by what I said earlier. I found an endless flame when I met and began loving you, Jaehyun. It doesn’t sting at all; it illuminates strongly every living day.”

Urging him to lower his stance with your fingers, you stated one last phrase. “Wherever you are, that’s where I want to be.”

“If that’s the case,” Jaehyun acknowledged, sticking his arm out for you. “Let’s get out of here.”

Astounded expressions crowded the socialites in the event as they watched the both of you exit together. If the news of Krystal and Donghyun weren’t crazy enough, some journalists figured the mysterious man behind The Poetic Rose and spread it like wildfire.

How was the youngest son of the Jeong family turned renowned romance novel author connected to the impressive, up-and-coming painter from London?

What really went down in Provence?

“How can you miss out on the signs? Did you not see them share a kiss earlier?” Key protested to those who weren’t approving whatever relationship you guys had. He loved his tea but hated those who simply were money hungry. Wanting a chance to be a part of the rich family, only to fish them out of their riches sooner or later.

Meanwhile, the winter season didn’t stop any of you from roaming the streets of Paris. Moments like these were a preview of the future you’ve envisioned with Jaehyun. Youthful, free, and fiery, a love between two artists created more magic not just in their crafts but to those around them.

Promenading a street overlooking the Seine River, Jaehyun took out a smaller instant camera from his pocket and took a candid shot of you. Stunned, you slapped his chest with your bag.

“Hey! Just how many more things are hidden in your blazer?”

“Just my wallet and a few condoms. Why’d you ask?” He raised a suggestive brow, feigning good intentions.

You hummed, faking your deep thought mindset. “At this rate, I don’t think we’ll make it back to my apartment alive.”

Jaehyun tugged you by your coat, his lips hovering your ear to whisper. “If we call a cab right now, I can finger you in the backseat.”

You chuckled at his vulgar idea, but it seemed ideal. You loved the thrill of getting caught or having someone overhearing you two, just like him. Besides, his fingers don’t match up to yours when you touch yourself alone in your apartment. You bat your eyelashes, giving in.

“Deal.”

6 ans plus tard (1964)

Summer returned, the sun strongly smiling down to the plentiful flowers at your family garden. By the patio of your home, your canvas was already laid by the easel stand. Shades of yellow were applied first to symbolize the brightness of the day, following the outline of your desired scenery for this piece.

Dipping the brush in water to change colors, you took another glance at the breezy sky. Light blue with clouds resembling soft pillows, you inhaled gently as your brush faintly stroked the canvas again.

Your hair was tied in a bun, meaning that you’re in for a busy session. But a more soothing one as the jazz music flowed from the vinyl player inside. Stress was the last thing you needed right now.

“What’s madame artiste up to right now?” Your husband piped in from behind, placing down a tray of tea and crackers. With some top buttons of his white top left unattended, you glimpsed on his toned chest when he leaned down. But you mustn’t pry whilst working, even when temptation was calling your name repeatedly.

“The summer sunshine healed me of my discomfort, so I think it’s about time I painted again.” You chewed on the snack, looking back and forth to the view. As enchanting as all the flowers you and him planted over the years grew, you’re more amused by a little boy strolling around it with his magnifying glass and tiny wooden basket with his furry puppy by his side.

His tiny legs often troubled the two of you because he enjoyed spending time with nature. Only God knows what he found in the garden this time.

“Adrien est explorer encore. Devrais-je lui dire qu’il change de place, ma chérie?” (Adrien is exploring again. Should I tell him to change places, my darling?) Jaehyun cautiously asked, not wanting his 3 year old son to impair your perspective.

“Non,” (No,) You held on to his hand, kissing it sweetly. Although you peeved any unnecessary details found in your scenery in the past, Adrien was an exception. As his mother, it’s hard to say no to him unless necessary.

“Il est un garçon curieux, alors il devrait explorer et flâner où il veut.” (He’s a curious boy, so he should explore and wander wherever he wants.)

Life ever since you returned to the countryside shifted into something more precious than you imagined. From moving places constantly, you found a home to settle in for good. A home with overflowing love and inspiration. A home within Jeong Jaehyun.

Recently, you halted your work-related activities in Paris and came home because you were heavily homesick. It even affected your health as a whole. So you made adjustments with your schedules, postponing appearances to events to next year.

On the plus side, you could be more active as a mother to Adrien. It felt like you burdened Jaehyun to take care of Adrien most of the time because he mainly worked from home, wherein important people who wanted to meet him would have to fly out to the countryside.

Back and forth to Paris, your presence towards Adrien often lacked. Here came your biggest fear, which was Adrien forgetting you. But Jaehyun told you over and over again that it wasn’t the case. As he listened to every wrenching thought you had, but he’d combat it with heartfelt words of reassurance so you wouldn’t overanalyze things.

He vowed to love and take care of you when times get hard, and he will continue doing so.

Remember when you said how his mansion felt too big?

It no longer did after getting married.

It gave more room to grow and breathe more life into it. When Adrien was born, he was the prime reflection of your and Jaehyun’s love. He mirrored his father’s physical traits but with a daring personality like yours. A perfect mixture, the world worked amazingly to bring a boy like him into your life.

“Maman! Papa!” Adrien bolted to where you and Jaehyun stood. From the clothes he wore, it’s very much clear that his father was in charge of it whilst you slept in the entire morning. Suspenders, capri shorts, a white shirt, and a red beret, he deserved his title as Jaehyun’s mini-me.

Jaehyun swelled with pride and love for his only son, peeking over what he brought to show and tell you both. “Oh Adrien, what do you have for us today?”

In his basket, there were 3 sunflowers stuck out from the edge. It’s been a while since you’ve seen some in full bloom, lowering your stance to get a more vivid view. He took them out to hand them to you and your husband.

One flower for Jaehyun and two for you. You let out a gasp, scrunching your brows to the center. He always gave one of each item to you and Jaehyun, never more or less.

“Ooh, deux fleurs pour Maman. Pourquoi, Rien?” (Ooh, two flowers for Mama. Why, Rien?) Jaehyun let his nickname out for his lips while you grasped his small hand.

“Well, I heard from Olivier next door that on his birthday, he gave extra flowers to his mother so he could have another sibling. And it worked!” He spoke so innocently, yet it hitched a choke from Jaehyun’s chest. Your eyes widened from disbelief. The information he collected due to his curiosity, no boundaries truly.

“Le mois prochain, c’est mon anniversaire. Je me demandais si je peux avoir un frère ou sœur comme Olivier? Tu es toujours occupée, comme Papa. Je ne veux plus être seul, alors je veux une amie aussi.” (It’s my birthday next month, and I was wondering if I can have a sibling like Olivier? You are always busy, like Papa. I don’t want to be alone anymore, so I want a friend too.)

You exchanged looks with Jaehyun, not knowing how exactly to respond. Although you and Jaehyun did agree that you wanted more than one child when you were younger, neither of you brought it up again since your careers were always loaded with plans.

Adrien was a surprise child actually, conceived on the night where you and Jaehyun celebrated after L’Été de 1957 was announced to be the best-selling romance novel of the decade in the country.

In Paris at his family home, where his parents brought out all their prized liquor, the two of you drank the entire night away to the point Krystal and Donghyun had to push you away from each other from your public affections because their children were present.

But it didn’t stop you two once you reached his bedroom, far away from everything and everyone. And you’ll never change it.

“Oh, Rien,” You eased in, consoling him. “Je suis désolé. Mais c’est franchement une grande demande, n'est-ce pas?” (I am sorry. But that’s quite a big request, right?)

“Mom and I will think about it first, okay? Another kid is a big responsibility, and you’ll be their older brother. That’s another important job, can you do it well?”

“Yes, I can, Papa!” He beamed with glee, his covered head patted by his father after. As you placed the sunflowers beside your palette, Adrien then proceeded to ask you if he could paint with you like old times.

Never you refuse especially with his sparkling round eyes and chubby face that makes you want to squish every time.

As you lifted his light body to sit on your lap, you placed your brush between his stubby fingers and carefully aimed in whatever angle seemed fit so the painting process would run smoothly and perfectly. He let out sounds of amazement when the strokes get bigger, jumping slightly too because the picture became more vivid. You’d smile and coo at him, commending whenever he followed instructions well. As his mother, you only encouraged your child in whatever they want to excel in.

Adrien was the child of two artists, so it was only natural that he had an artistic side in his veins.

Too caught up in your fun, hearing the automatic shutter of the camera from your side was delayed. The source was none other than Jaehyun hiding behind his camera. Jaehyun’s heart soared at the heavenly view of the most important people in his life, wanting to treasure the moment as a lovely memory.

“Hey!” You shouted, placing down the messy brush by the palette. “Je suis très laid!” (I am very ugly!)

“Shh! Tu est rayonnant, ma chérie. Papa est juste, Rien?” (Shh! You are glowing, my darling. Papa is right, Rien?)

Jaehyun politely quizzed the peppy boy, nodding excitedly. His dimples deeply showed up, the main trait he claimed from his father.

“Oui, papa! Maman est toujours belle!” (Yes, papa! Mama is always beautiful!)

He exclaimed, pecking your cheek numerously. You squealed, attacking him with tickles and kisses back. His shouts of delight, then he was suddenly carried by your tall husband in the air like he was flying in the sky. Adrien enjoyed that motion highly, ending up on Jaehyun’s shoulders shortly after to play by the garden again.

“Go paint. I’ll take care of him now.” Jaehyun persuaded, roaming through the long rows of flowers in full bloom. Though seconds after adding some strokes to your piece, you let down your hair, put a hat and sandals on, and ran to the cute duo to join them.

And that’s how your family spent the entire afternoon. By the garden, running around and taking photos and short videos from Jaehyun’s camera. Freezing these valuable memories, this was truly the life you loved so much.

After your break, you could convince the company you worked at that you’d prefer fewer trips to Paris and stay in the countryside longer. How badly you’ve wanted to hold your exhibits here instead. Plus like Jaehyun, let influential people visit you. You’ve already made a big name for yourself now, so that should be valid enough.

Dinner time passed by quickly too, eventually putting Adrien to a smooth slumber as you massaged the roots of his soft hair while Jaehyun sang him a lullaby. This was your joint parenting technique with him since he was a newborn, and it worked quickly as lightning.

You redressed into your silk nightgown after bringing your canvas to the master bedroom, opening the balcony doors to invite the cool breeze in. You tweaked some bits of your painting, including a silhouette of your small family. Regarding where to place it, probably by the living room as it matched the theme.

“What a spectacular day, don’t you think, ma chérie?” Jaehyun conversed, admiring the calm movements of your brush. He noticed a quirky smile grace your lips.

“It’s been a long time since we had quality time like that with Rien. He’s a feisty ball of energy these days.” You replied with a nostalgic daze. “It’s so crazy how one day, he was still crawling to us. Now, he could outrun the both of us.”

“Comme le temps passe vite, hmm?” (How time flies fast, hmm?) Nodding, nothing braced for what your husband had in mind. You almost dropped your brush mid-way. Jaehyun’s lips impatiently devoured your neck, his huge hands fondling your breasts. Violently throwing your head back against his chest, a needy moan parted your lips.

“Jae-” His touches reaching south to where you desired him highly, dampening hastily as your legs naturally spread apart. Rushed exhales, “À quoi tu penses maintenant?” (What are you thinking about right now?)

“Rien se sent seul,” (Rien feels alone,) His hot breath whispered against your ear, his fingers dangerously trailing your thin panties up and down. With your hands tightly clutching on his bicep,

“Alors, donnons-lui une amie.” (We should give him a friend.)

Ever since Adrien mentioned such a daring topic, it hasn’t left Jaehyun’s mind the whole day. After seeing you in utter bliss with your son earlier, he found you so majestic and radiant. It’s a different kind of happiness, especially for parents.

Now you went on hiatus, he thought that it was the right time to have another. He enjoyed his younger years with Krystal, and he wanted Adrien to experience it too. 3 years was quite a wait, and it seemed ideal to try again.

From his nude chest, you flipped around to intensely clash his lips with yours. Draping your arms behind his neck, Jaehyun lifted your entire figure from the chair. His hands gripping on your butt, he delicately lowered you down your bed.

Drowning into his sensual kisses with his hands all over you, this could prolong for hours. Reddening love marks started to resurface whilst your fingers tugged on the drawstring of his pajama pants. Jaehyun’s fingers dove under the fabric of your panties, his index finger rubbing figure 8s the sensitive bundle of nerves.

You struggled to swallow your moans, not wanting Rien to hear it. You wouldn’t want to repeat history, covering it as Jaehyun massaging you after a hard day.

“I know you want one too, ma chérie.” His fingers began to drape down the straps of your gown, presenting your breasts in its full, perky view. But before his lips could suck on your erect nipples, you parted momentarily from him and got up on your feet. Pulling up your straps again, Jaehyun simply laid down but he wasn’t pleased from how you left him hanging.

“Où vas-tu, ma chérie?” (Where are you going, sweetheart?)

He was growing impatient. You were never to interrupt such a sexy atmosphere ever.

From one of your drawers in your vanity table, an important, half-opened envelope was hidden. You were supposed to give it tomorrow but now seemed like a perfect time. Reading it as soon one of the maids handed it to you gave you the jitters, but in a positive way. Sitting back down on the edge of your bed, you exhilaratingly passed it to your husband.

“Qu’est-ce que c’est?” (What is this?)

“Ouvre-le.” (Open it.)

Jaehyun slowly opened the edges and once he took out the contents. Reading it thoroughly, he couldn’t believe it as his jaw dropped, pacing from the letter and you back and forth.

“Vraiment, ma chérie?” (Really, my darling?)

It was from a doctor you visited in Paris a few days before you left, who confirmed just exactly what caused your health to go feeble suddenly. You already had one certain suspicion, which you addressed in your leave of absence letter. Amelié, who finally got the position as the head, couldn’t believe her ears and insisted you take all the time off you needed.

“On dirait que Adrien a reçu son cadeau d'anniversaire en avance.” (It looks like Adrien received his birthday gift early.)

Overall, it turned out the headaches and repeated vomiting you mistook as motion sickness from traveling was a surprise hello to your second child.

A girl specifically, thanks to the blood test she recommended.

“Je t’aime, (Y/N).”

“Montre moi combien tu m’aimes, Jaehyun.” (Show me how much you love me, Jaehyun.)

The whole night through, the two of you vigorously celebrated with the moonlight from the windows and a few scented candles set in the room. Wet kisses left on your collarbone, words of devotion exchanged, holding his hand as he groaned from heartily thrusting in you, the number of moans from your lips overlapped with the vinyl playing in the room. The intimacy between you two increased, almost as if you made love for the first time again all those years ago.

Excluding being drenched from the rain.

Once the two of you grew tired, Jaehyun lied down beside you. Wrapping one arm around, one hand trailed down your naked skin again. His wedding band flashed your eyes, reminding you of the commitment you promised each other. For better, and for worse.

Jaehyun promised to love you endlessly as a woman and his wife, and it didn’t cease when you became the mother of his children. He respected how strong you are, physically and mentally. He helped you in any way he could as you endured the struggling process.

At the end of the day, his family was his biggest priority. More than ever now, you needed him as you go through the pregnancy phases again. Specifically, his index finger lingered on your stomach. There was no bump or other signs of showing, except for that glow he complimented you earlier on.

“We met and fell in love over the summer, got married in summer, had Adrien mid-summer, and now found out about our daughter at the start of summer.” He smiled, blessed at all the good he’s received during this time.

“The summer gods must adore us.” Your vacant hand with your wedding band topped his. To love and to cherish. “Ils m'ont amené à toi.” (They brought me to you.)

His power on you was simply addicting, as if your early twenties revisited you. You straddled himself once again, your fingers caressing his face sweetly. When it reached his lips, he placed longing kisses there and pulled you closer again for another kiss on your lips. In between, you mumbled in a silvery tone,

“Then they led us to say I do. Pour toujours et à jamais.”

copyright © 2021 by alluringjae.

[justathoughtfulangel]

Colors - Kai Parker Fanfiction

Colors – a beautiful aspect of our lives that we often take for granted. If we didn’t have colors to differentiate objects, we would see the world in heartbreaking shades of grey. This sparked an idea in my mind.

I’m going to write a Kai Parker fanfiction based on the classic soulmate plotline: everyone’s world is black and white until they meet their soulmate. Keep reading to find out some details about the piece!

*not my gif

I don’t like writing with Y/N in the place of character names, but this IS a reader insert fanfiction. I use Rosalie Wilson as a placeholder. I also do not include physical descriptions of the Reader character, so you are free to imagine her appearance as you wish.

Rosalie/Rose = Your Name (Y/N)

Rose = Your Nickname (Y/N/N) (if you have one/like nicknames)

Wilson = Your Last Name (Y/L/N)

Here are some details you will need to understand the background of the story:

1) Only supernaturals/beings with magical abilities can detect their soulmates; humans cannot. I included this mostly to support the canonical Stefan-Elena-Damon love triangle. Damon and Elena did not discover they were soulmates until Elena became a vampire. Damon and Stefan didn’t know about soulmates when Katherine was messing around with them. If one soulmate is human, they will not see colors until they meet their soulmate again as a supernatural being.

2) Soulmate pairings that may appear in this series will be Damon X Elena, Stefan X Caroline, Alaric X Jo, Bonnie X Enzo, Tyler X Liv, and (obviously) Kai X Reader.

3) In some cases, meeting your soulmate is not always a moment of pure joy and excitement. That will be made clear.

4) The Reader (who will be labeled as Rosalie in the story) is a witch, and she was born colorblind. Her birthday is May 10th, 1994 – the same night Kai was sent to the Prison World.

5) Continuing on this idea, Kai had never seen color in the Prison World; he believed it to be another magical aspect of his punishment. It was only when he returned to the real world that he realized his soulmate must have been born that same night.

6) When your soulmate dies, your world loses color again. In this story, the Mystic Falls gang knew Damon and Bonnie were still alive even after the Other Side collapsed as neither Elena nor Enzo lost colors from their vision.

7) The story begins when Kai kidnaps Elena in Mystic Falls to practice controlling his magic. Events will vary greatly from the show's storyline from that point onwards.

I haven’t yet decided how many chapters this story will have. The Kai Parker One Shot I'm most proud of (The Shadow of Your Heart) ended up having a wildly different plotline than what I first imagined once I let my mind run wild. Though I have some major plot points in mind, I’d like to see what happens when I don’t have the entire fanfiction planned out like I usually do. Thank you for being a part of my creativity :)

This story is currently in progress. View the masterlist here.

If you’d like to be tagged in chapters of this fanfiction or any of my future Kai Parker stories, please leave a comment here or message me. All of my past works can be found on my Malachai Parker Masterlist.

Until next time, JustAThoughtfulAngel <3

Taglist: @bluelicious, @socio-kai-path1972, @prettybitchfatwitch, @genevivetaylor

[silversatoru]

one more day

gojo satoru x f!reader

synopsis: Gojo's been sizing you up from across the club for awhile now, so when you walk out onto the empty balcony and give him the perfect opportunity to shoot his shot, he's more than happy to do so. After charming you with his oh so eloquent words, he may or may not fuck the shit out of you in the back of his car.

tags/warnings: smut, with a little bit of plot, if you squint you might be able to see the plot, very nsfw (18+), bar/club au

word count: 2.5k

a/n: i based the plot/idea of this fic on the song HER by chase atlantic. if you know it, i love you, lets be friends. if you don't, i highly recommend it, its a bop and a half

Gojo gracefully lifted his whiskey sour up to his lips, taking a small sip and closing his eyes. The music was getting loud and he hadn’t met a single interesting person here tonight. He exhaled deeply — this would be his last drink and then he’d probably call it early tonight and head home. 

He sat the nearly empty glass back down on the bar counter top and slid some cash to the bartender before turning around and scanning the club one last time. His lazy eyes shot open when he saw you standing with your friends across the room, his interest suddenly piqued. He hadn’t noticed you before, but now that he did, he couldn’t leave without talking to you. 

You seemed lost in your own thoughts, aimlessly dancing with your friends with a fake smile plastered across your face. Your façade was terribly see-through, though none of your friends seemed to notice, or maybe they just didn’t care. 

Eventually, you separated from your group, heading up the stairs and towards the balcony of the club. Gojo watched as you walked, a slight wobble to your gait and an expensive looking handbag dangling from your wrist. 

He gave you a two-minute head start, and then made his way up the stairs and out onto the balcony as well. You two were the only one’s insane enough to go out there, the winter air incredibly frigid at this time of night. He strode over and took a seat opposite you, a relaxed expression on his face. 

You lifted your cigarette from your lips, blowing out a puff of smoke and giving him a small smile, “Hey, pretty-boy, I had a feeling you’d be joining me out here”.

“I had a feeling you only came out here so I’d follow you,” His words were care-free but perfectly composed. 

“Maybe,” You laugh, taking another drag from your cigarette and propping your feet up on the table. 

Gojo sat back, fully taking you in now. You were wearing a silky red dress, the extravagant fabric clinging perfectly to every curve of your body. Your hands flashed with several gold rings and long, shiny black nails -- cigarettes didn’t belong in fingers that beautiful. 

“Your little show you’re putting on for everyone is pitiful you know. Some improv classes might help” Gojo prodded at you. 

“That’s a new one. Is this how you flirt with all girls?” You couldn’t help but laugh — a light elegant laugh that was music to the silver-haired man’s ears.

“Of course not, but I’ve also never met someone who was such a bad actor before,” He crossed one of his long legs over the other, his own lips cracking a small smile.

“I’ve never met someone who was so weirdly good at reading people. How long were you watching me?” You jab back at him, putting out your cigarette and tossing it into a nearby trash bin. 

“Not too long,” He shrugged, “So, what’s your deal? Mommy issues? You seem like someone who has mommy issues”. 

You laughed again, this strange man continuing to catch you incredibly off guard, “So close. My mom wasn’t great but I think it’s more of a daddy issues thing”. 

“Ouch,” He clicked his tongue, “Mommy and daddy issues, you’re the total package huh? I bet there’s a couple toxic ex-boyfriend’s in there too, right?” 

“You could say that,” You give him a playful glance. 

“How about you let me take it all away tonight? All the pain,” He leaned forward now, his icy blue eyes practically peering into your soul. 

His offer sounded absolutely perfect — you could use a nice distraction from the shit-show that was your life.

“We can do whatever you want, pretty-boy, just don’t fall in love with me, okay? I don’t do second rounds,” You winked at him, standing up from your seat and offering him a hand. 

“Deal,” Gojo laced his fingers through yours and stood up, a smirk tugging at his lips. 

“How big is your car?” You ask while the two of you stride through the club, hand in hand. 

“Big enough if we put the back seats down,” He looked down at you with hazy eyes. 

“Perfect”. 

                                                                            It didn’t take long for Gojo to put down the back seats of his relatively large, black SUV — and before you knew it he was swiftly pulling you inside and locking the doors.

It was too dark to see much of anything, so you flinched when he wrapped a firm arm around your waist and flipped you underneath him. You expected a rough kiss to your lips, but were taken by surprise when you felt a subtle touch on your neck instead. He left gentle, wet kisses up both sides of your neck, soft sighs of bliss slipping out from between your lips. 

The gentle kisses slowly got more intense, his teeth leaving small nibbles and his tongue working furiously against your skin. You caught yourself wondering how that tongue would feel on other parts of your body. 

You traced your fingers up his arms and cupped them around his cheeks, pulling his face to meet yours. You were desperate to actually kiss him, parting your lips and placing a kiss to his incredibly soft lips. He was quick to deepen it, his long fingers intertwining themselves in your hair. Sparks of electricity were going off in your head, your thoughts blurring together as you lost yourself in Gojo Satoru’s captivating kiss.  

He slowly pulled away after a couple minutes, his breaths heavy. 

“Can I take your clothes off, angel?” 

You whisper a small confirmation, your skin tingling under his soft touches. You quickly twisted onto your stomach and he swiftly pulled the zipper down the back of your dress. He carefully removed the silky material from your body, leaving you in only your undergarments. 

He ran his cool fingertips up your sides, inspecting every inch of your body with his curious hands. A heavy breath shuddered from his throat as he pressed his lips onto your torso, his breath hot against your cool skin. He left kisses all over your body, sucking hard on the sensitive spots and leaving you breathlessly wanting more. 

His kisses got lower and lower until he was sucking on a sensitive patch of skin on the inside of your thigh. He lifted his head and you could practically feel his heavy breaths hitting the heat between your legs. 

“I can take these off too?” He asked, slipping his slender fingers under the band of your underwear. 

“Please,” you exhale, curling your fingers into his soft, fluffy hair. 

After gaining confirmation, he wastes no time pulling the panties down your legs and throwing them to the side. His warm tongue was quick to find your clit, swirling in small, gentle circles. He sucked the small nub into his mouth, gently nibbling on it and sending intense shivers coursing through your body. Soft, strangled moans escaped your lips as he continued to work, his hot tongue lapping up and down your slick entrance. 

Your fingers curled tighter in his hair, yanking hard when he pressed his tongue deep into your entrance. This was complete bliss — you had a terrible habit of one-night stands but no one had ever made you feel this good — and you hadn’t even gotten to the main course yet. 

He lifted his head and pressed a small kiss to your lower abdomen before sitting up. His slender hands went straight to the buckles of his trousers, his fingers working quickly to get them undone. You sat up and moved towards him, ready to reciprocate the favor he just did for you — but he quickly pushed you away. 

“Lay down, angel. I told you, tonight’s about making you feel good,” His words were smooth and serious, and they made your heart beat a little faster. 

You were more than happy to oblige, leaning back and enjoying the show while he finished removing his boxers. Your eyes had adjusted to the dark now, and your stomach filled with butterflies when his full length was finally exposed. You sucked in a sharp breath, worried that his lengthy shaft would cause more pain than pleasure. 

He pulled out a condom and expertly slid it down to the base of his cock, and when he looked up again, he seemed to notice your hesitancy. 

“Relax, baby. I’ll start slow,” He whispered, leaning forward and pressing more gentle kisses to the sides of your face while he teased your entrance. 

Shudders ripped through your body as he rubbed the tip of his length up and down your swollen pussy, a small snicker audible from his lips as he nibbled on your earlobe. You roughly bucked up your hips, desperate for more than what he was teasing you with. 

“Relax,” he repeated, but this time it sounded more like an order. 

Again, you obliged, but not without a small whimper sneaking its way out of your mouth. 

He did exactly what he said he would, positioning the tip of his cock and slowly pushing it inside of you. He carefully inserted his entire length, your body tensing up underneath him. He leaned down and pressed another kiss to your cheek bone, whispering feverishly in your ear. 

“You okay?”

You give him an eager nod, the initial pain of taking his massive length slowly starting to subside.

“Good,” he mumbled, beginning short, tender strokes that made your entire body feel like it was on fire.

Heavy, raspy groans forced their way out of both of your throats — your hands grasping fiercely at tufts of his hair. He gradually increased his pace as your walls adjusted to his size, and somehow it managed to feel better and better each time. 

Gojo let out a deep groan, his head dipping low as endorphins exploded within him, causing a blissful feeling to wash over his body. Your light moans and scattered whimpers were filling his ears, and he decided they were his new favorite sound. He’d do whatever it took to keep those beautiful noises coming out of your pretty mouth. 

We can do whatever you want, pretty-boy, just don’t fall in love with me, okay? Your words echoed in his head. Normally, that kind of thing wouldn’t be a problem for Gojo, but as he stared down at the dimly illuminated silhouette of your body — he realized he was breaking the deal. You were breathtaking, every curve of your body felt perfect against his hands, and he knew he’d need to see you again — one night wasn’t enough.

His hips began thrusting faster, forcing the tip of his cock impossibly deeper inside of you, a strangled cry forcing its way out of your lips. He groaned and threw his head back at the sound of your whimpers, his own need building stronger in his stomach. Your head felt like it was spinning, each thrust sending electrical pulses of pleasure through your core. 

Gojo slowed his hips for just a moment, leaning down and whispering in your ear.

“I want you to come, tell me how you like it,” his words sent a series of shivers all the way down to your fingertips. 

“Fuck, from behind, please,” You whined back, your voice shaky and filled with need. 

“Okay, get up,” he instructed, pulling back and removing his shaft from inside you.

You sucked in a sharp breath of air at his sudden absence, quickly climbing into position and desperate to feel him inside of you again. 

“Such a good girl,” he cooed, firmly grasping his hand around either side of your hips. 

He wasted no time driving forward and sheathing himself back into your tight cunt, raspy groans ripping through his throat. It didn’t take long for that warm pressure to build up in your core, your hips shifting back against his to help him get even deeper. Your moans and whimpers got louder, more needy, filled with desperation — you needed to come so badly, and you were painfully stuck right on the cusp. 

“Come for me, angel. Let me make you feel good,” he murmured — his gently, lusty voice exactly what you needed to push you over the edge. 

Your body began to shake, a warm feeling erupting in your stomach as your walls clenched hard against his cock. Pleasure-filled cries filled the car, your body heaving and convulsing as the intense contractions coursed through you. 

Gojo rolled his hips back, caught off guard by just how good it felt to have you come all over him. He felt his own climax suddenly wash over him, raspy strings of curse words rattling out of his mouth as he slammed hard into your hips. You whined loudly in response, the intensity of his peak greatly enhancing your own. 

A few moments later you were both collapsed next to each other, the only sound being your uneven breaths. 

“I think I broke our deal,” Gojo spoke between heavy breaths, “I want to see you again”.

You let out a shaky laugh, still catching your own breath, “I tried to warn you, I don’t do second dates”. 

“Mhm, but this is different, right? I know no one has ever made you feel that good before,” he rolled over to face you. 

“Maybe,” You shoot him a side-ways glance.

“So, let me make you feel good again,” He was practically pleading with you, “I can make your pain better, just give me one more day. And then one more day after that too. Just keep giving me one day, until there’s no more days left to give”. 

You let out a heavy sigh, your heart aching at the idea of getting to know this mysterious man a little bit better.

“I’ll be honest, your offer is incredibly tempting,” You turn so you’re facing him too.

“So accept it,” he smiled, his eyes darker and heavier than they’d been all night. 

“If we’re lucky enough for our paths to intertwine a second time, I’ll consider it,” You smile back, sitting up and slipping your dress over your head.

“Zip this for me?” You turn around so your back is facing Gojo.

One of his soft hands rested firmly on your hip to hold the fabric in place, and the second carefully zipped up your dress. A chill ran through your shoulders at just how gentle he’d consistently been with your body all night.

“Thank you,” You mumbled as you reached for your underwear, pulling them back up around your hips.

Gojo hummed in response, gathering his own clothes and slipping them back on. 

“What’s your name, pretty-boy?” You coo at him as you slip your heels back onto your feet.

“Gojo Satoru. Do I have the pleasure of getting to know yours?” He peered over at you, lazily pulling his shirt back over his head. 

“No, that’s a secret for now. But if we do meet again, I’ll tell you,” A small smirk tugged at the corners of your lips, “And by the way, I do hope we meet again, Gojo Satoru”. 

[janumun]

Hi! I'm new to your Tumblr, but I've been following you on Twitter for a while. I read your Luka Clemence NSFW and just about CRIED, he is so sweet! I know I'm not an official friend or mutual, but if you're willing to take my request anyway, I'd love to read a drabble about Luka falling for an older lady (10-ish yrs older than him) who has already been married and divorced and is kinda chubby (yeah, self-insert 😏). She likes to cook, too, and is introverted like him. Thanks for reading my request, and for writing such lovely fic 😊

Twitter acquaintances (and with our similar taste in Gen/shin couples? 🥰) can count 😆 Thank you for letting me know you enjoyed my not so very innocent headcanons for Luka. I haven’t written for IkeRev (or Luka!) in a long time so I hope this is as sweetly tender as I wished to make it!

(Requests for this event are now closed, dear readers. Thank you to all those who participated.)

Rated: SFW/General Audiences Tags: first confessions, kisses and [I hope] general goodness and good-boy vibes

Summary: Luka has, and sorts through, a lot of his own thoughts on Alice.

Their ‘Alice’ is a kind one; she’s been a quiet, good joy for all of his noisy family at the Black headquarters, ever since her arrival in Cradle. A shared radiance; a silent, present helping hand around the entire base. Be it Sirius’ gardens and Chutney, Fenrir’s gun collection needing constant assortment. Seth’s albeit shy dress-up partner or when Ray requires her help within his office on busy days.

And him; perhaps her good kindness has warmed and aided him the most. Luka has to tuck in insistent reminders to himself: she is their friend and family, Alice, not… his. Not only.

“Is this alright?”

The sound of her voice strikes him out of his distracted spiral, violent enough, he jerks straight up against his previous leaning space at the counter where they’re working.

“Luka?” There’s gentle doubt in that one call of his name, Luka feels his shame, immediately palpable, at the nature of his thoughts.

“I’m sorry, I’m here.” He turns to devote his entire attention to their task at hand, their moment of peace, instead of wayward thoughts. “What were you saying?”

“Is this batter the right consistency?” Her smile is… pretty; she tucks a tiny one his way, half sheepish, half hopeful, reaching a futile hand to slip stray locks aside, awaiting his answer. Luka’s incredibly conscious of the arm that lifts on its own to help, fingers cradling her ear for the briefest of touches on his tuck back of her hair. The blush he feels burning against his own just as fast and obvious as his retreat from her person.

“Yes, it’s alright.” And then, a beat later, to dissipate that tickling unease, “You’re a fast learner.”

“…Thank you, it’s all due to you being kind enough to keep me company.” They’re both stiff now; she’s opted to staring hard into the creamy bowl in front. Remorseful, he nearly apologizes for his rude familiarity before she brings their conversation back to the recipe at hand. Leaving him a conflicting mixture of relief and penitence.

Their conversation carries on to their usual easy track, Luka’s usual focus a mere quarter, on the subject at hand, before she startles him once more with her words.

“My ex made this… just once, for us.” Her former husband, from her world, he recalls, with a twinge of feelings he’s not quite sure how to stomach.

Luka wonders, not for the first time, if she misses her home, the easy comfort of it. Displaced from his own, voluntarily as it was, harsh as the place he grew up in, he feels for Alice and her circumstances, more than most. Even if she is a person who brings him joy, a tasl as simple as meal preparations, he finds he looks forward to, with her, day after day.

Luka takes over the whisk from where her hand slows, gently relieving her of the bowl. “Do you miss your home?” He asks of her quietly.

“Sometimes.”

An understandable answer.

“But I find that I am happiest here in this place I’ve made with you all.” She pauses, fixing a half smile his way. “And you’re the biggest reason for that, Luka, so… thank you, for everything that you do.” His hands grind to an abrupt, startled halt.

He knows his cheeks are inevitably bright, he tries to hedge his gaze away from hers, unsuccessful, when she presses a gentle thumb to his cheek. “You’ve got some flour here.”

“Oh. Thank—” His view is all her, all of a sudden: pretty, bright cheeks and a quiet, determined gaze, slow in its closing in, as if giving him an out. And then, her lips as they press into the spot her thumb vacated. Her breath is warmer against his hot face as she retreats and he cannot help but blink at her; adoration he does not think he hides well-enough anymore.

She looks almost as startled as he does, words beginning to slip over a hasty apology when he does not speak. Before he reaches for her hand in a diffident hold, breathes out, then meets her gaze, despite the fire in his own cheeks. “And I… am grateful that you’re here, I… feel the same.” No doubts; only reassurance offered for her sweet trust placed in him.

Her stunned hope is a gift he feels is too precious to hold, Luka bites back a budding smile, even as they draw close. This time so natural, so sweetly. He presses a quick kiss onto her cheek this time, quiet happiness at the warmth he savors there. “Thank you for being here with me.”

End Notes: Thank you for reading!

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