#i know its gonna be sorrows coming up so i wanna enjoy it while it lasts

[storge]

The envoy sent a message back. Fan Xian fell ill and passed away on the way back to the capital. His body has already been cremated.

ZHANG RUOYUN as Fan Xian Joy of Life 2 (2024)

[sashi-ya]

ᴍɪɴɪ ᴇᴠᴇɴᴛ > ＣＯＴＴＯＮ ＣＡＮＤＹ ＣＬＯＵＤＳ˚۰

ＳＵＮＦＬＯＷＥＲ 🌻 ＦＩＥＬＤＳ ｋｉｓｕｋｅ ｕｒａｈａｒａ ｘ ｆ！ ｒｅａｄｅｒ

4k raffle price for: @jin-supremacy01 thank so much for your participation! I hope you enjoy love!! 💖🌻 tw. nothing really. sweetest sfw ever. :3 wc. 2.2k masterlist.

Run, run throw the sunflowers field. run, and take his hand.

The waraji hitting against the ground were making him uncomfortable, so he took them off. His ashy blonde hair changes to orange with the sunset lights, his silly laughter echoes through a yellow immensity.

You reach his finger; he pulls you closer. “We don’t have these in the soul society, that’s why I stayed in the living world” he lies, of course he does.

“We don’t have you there either” you smile back, eyes fixed on his silver ones.

Kisuke pouts, he is way too intelligent to understand exactly what you were saying. Both being Shinigami, loving each other so much, but living in different realities was something that you didn’t really like. At all.

“I told you, (Name)-san. I can’t go back” he sighs. But… is Kisuke really that intelligent, after all? Were you really asking him to go back to the Seireitei, or, were you asking for something different…?

The scientist -now a “handsome, sexy young shop keeper”- pulls you closer to his chest as he stops in the middle of the sunflowers. Nuzzling on his pale exposed chest, you rest for a bit, inhaling his unique skin scent.

Allowing his arms and reiatsu to embrace, you enjoy the last hours of your free day outside the Gotei 13 facilities. He notices your sorrow, that’s the same as his.

“I’m sorry…” he mumbles, with his chin over the crown of your head, tracing circles over your back with his palm. You sometimes feel Benihime grazing your side, but you know he is just holding it in his cane form.

“It’s ok… you brought me here because you know how much I like sunflowers. Thank you” you tell him, muzzled on his pecs. You play with the hem of his musk green coloured clothes, inhaling his scent, feeling the warmth of his flesh against your lips.

Kisuke knows you aren’t happy, he really knows. He takes his hat off, and places it on your head. “Keep it. You will bring it to me whenever you come back. It’s gonna be soon, hey!” he tries to make it better for you.  

You are gonna be busy with missions while serving at the Seireitei so it’s gonna be hard -again- to go back to sleep alone in your home at the barracks.

“You sure I can take it with me?” you mumble, looking up at him with puppy eyes and pouty lips.

“Yes, and stop making that face or else I will have to kidnap you and make you my employee. You wanna sell candy all day?” he says, with pain in those last words.

You blink, why is he sad if you were to give everything away just to be with him, your Shinigami career, your zanpakuto even… “I wish…” you whisper, almost inaudibly, enough for him to imagine what you said.

Urahara meditates for a few seconds looking at how you hide under the wings of his bucket hat, and, you notice in his reaction that he has finally come up to a conclusion.

What could it be?

He walks with you in between the flowers that often look at the sun become down as the last rays of it had abandoned the day. Both sit on the back seats of his van and from there you take your time to observe the moon shining its light over the fields.

The rustling sound of the sleeping sunflowers lulls you. You place your head on his shoulder while Kisuke rounds you with his dark green haori as the night becomes a little chilly.

He plays with your hair until you finally fall asleep. The ex-captain looks at your peaceful countenance with longing. He doesn’t even know by now how old he is, but he knows he had been alive for the longest time, and, he is sure that he has never seen someone as beautiful as you.

“Is it time already? Should I-…” he whispers, stopping himself from keep talking as you snuggle closer to his body.

“mhgfh Kisuke- i- go take a bath” you mumble in your sleep, causing the shop owner to bite his lips not to laugh like an idiot.

“You give me orders even while sleeping…beautiful woman” He kisses your head and closes the door of the van, tonight you will be sleeping there…

As the first sunrays hit the field, and the flowers look straight up to the sun for energy, you both open your eyes. Your pager announces you it’s time to come back to the Soul Society, and, even if you don’t want to you simply have to.

“Are you hungry?” he asks, before touching you with the tip of his cane.

“My gigai is hungry, not me” you mumble, while rubbing an eye to shake off the sleepiness. You need to leave the fake body behind before passing the senkaimon, and so Kisuke will help you do so.

After your soul takes the body form, and the gigai fells on his arms, you look at it with jealousy. What would you give to still feel his touch on that skin.

“Sure you aren’t hungry?” he asks again, just to make sure you have enough spiritual pressure.

You nod, the shihakusho you are used to love now feels like some kind of punishment. Why… come home, please…

The delicate hands of the scientist round your waist, pulling you closer to him, as behind you the world penetration gate opens. Both are surrounded by a purest light. It’s so bright, that even the sunflowers turn to it. Or maybe they just wanted to see the sweet depiction of love in between two eternal souls.

A kiss on your lips, a kiss on your nose. A kiss on his forehead as you stand in tippy toes.

“I don’t wanna go back” you protest, with your forehead pressed against his. But your pager keeps ringing. Your captain keeps calling you, he wants you there. Kurotsuchi Taicho, or maybe Akon. Whatever the case it is, you must go.

“Go now. I promise you I will have something for you when you come back” Kisuke smiles, putting his hat back on your head. “And I told you, I want you to keep it until you came back, ok?”

You try to stop your lips from trembling, every time you have to come back it’s the same, but he has never given you his stripped bucket hat.

“uhum. uhum.” you nod repeatedly, because there is nothing you could say without bursting into tears. And after a sweet last kiss you finally turn around to pass the door.

His fingers softly let go of your wrist, one by one. Kisuke is making sure you are able to feel his spiritual pressure up until the last moment.

The black butterfly that gets out, sounds like a jingle bell, and before the light totally engulfs you he smiles and mouths “I love you, please come back”

You count the days. It’s not a lot, but it’s not just a week. You fulfil your investigation duties with utmost care, helping the Shinigami Research and Development Institute to keep the Seireitei working and safe. But, your heart is aching. You miss Kisuke more than anything.

“What is it, (Name)?” your lieutenant Akon, asks. “Noth-nothing” you sigh, trying not to throw a certain liquid that your hands hold.

He frowns, and then lets a little scoff scape his lips. “Go ahead, I know you are missing Urahara-san. I don’t mind finishing what you are doing, it’s not gonna change anything if you come or not tomorrow. Go, I will excuse you with Captain Kurotsuchi”

You pout, sniffle, and hug him. He had become such a big man after all these years; you remember him with pure love as the tiny kid under Mayuri’s lab coat following him everywhere.  

“THANK YOU SO MUCH VICE CAPTAIN!” you chime, making the always serious man to smile warmly.

“Now go, go! Kurotsuchi Taicho is about to come with little Nemuri”

You hang your coat and quickly put everything you were using in place. And right before you leave, Akon has something else to say to you.

“Oi, (Name)… come and visit us some time, ok?” he says, confusing you to no extent. What is he talking about?

“Akon-san, what do you mean? I’m gonna be ok! I’ll be back in some days!”

You run towards the streets of the Gotei 13 facilities with happiness in your heart, you are gonna see your lover earlier and you wanna make sure you had everything ready so you go as fast as possible.

You hesitate to call him and announce you are getting there one day earlier, but you resolve not doing it just to surprise him… “He told me he will give me a surprise when I get there, but, I’m going to surprise him too!”

As soon as you finish packing some basic stuff, since your gigai’s clothes are all at the world of the living, you cross the senkaimon through the dangai again. (This time running from the Kōtotsu, wondering if Mayuri knew you were scaping one day earlier and had decided to make it difficult to you)

Before you arrive Kisuke’s shop and home, you fix the hat on your head. He told you that whenever you came back you should give it back to him, but the truth is that is gonna be difficult to, since you have slept with it every single day you weren’t with him.

Sneaking on the back, concealing your spiritual pressure, you take a look at the little window to see him speaking to Tessai. You smirk with a naughty attitude, you wonder what they were discussing, probably something about the shop.

However, that’s not exactly what you listen…

“Urahara-san, you have to be brave and tell her” his loyal companion says, serving him a cup of tea.

“It’s not about bravery, Tessai-san. It’s about… her. I’m afraid she is gonna suffer” Kisuke mumbles, scratching his dishevelled hair and his a week of no shave face.

You swallow… if there is something that he needs to be brave to tell you that will potentially harm you that means is something bad. “He wants to leave me…” you murmur, trying not to cry even if a tear is already scaping your eye.

You can’t keep listening, and, instead you leave the hat over the window sill right before running away.

You run, fast in between the people. In any case they won’t see you, you are still a soul with no real body. The gusts your shihakusho creates alerts the citizens, but they simply think it’s just wind that bring them, somehow, sorrow.

And you run that much that you get to the last place you’ve been happy; the sunflowers fields of Karakura city. “Hi… sweet flowers, you know? He doesn’t love me, but I do love him… just like you all love the Sun”

“What are you saying, (Name)-san? Do you really think I don’t love you?” a soft voice makes your muscles suddenly stiffen up.  “Do you really think that?” he asks, coming closer.

You can’t look at him. He knows, of course he knows you were there. He can sense you, there is only so much you can do to hide your reiatsu from him.

“Tell me, (Name)-san. Do you really think that?” he repeats, at your back, never coming closer to touch you. And it hurts, somehow you want his touch, you need it.

“Kisuke… I- I heard you talking about it… you are gonna leave me, right?” you ask, with your eyes fixed on the sunset ahead. Just like every time you two say goodbye, the golden hour caressing your cheeks and the yellow petals of countless sunflowers.

You notice he is not saying anything, nor even breathing. You are getting annoyed, and so, impulsed by your own heart you turn around…

“Marry me?” he asks, looking like a cute little puppy, blushed and kneeling on the ground with a weird looking ring on his hand.

You blink, and gawk. What… the hell?

“I’m sorry if this makes you suffer… I just- I just don’t want you to leave the courts if you don’t want to. I- I’m gonna go back to the Seireitei if that is what it takes to be with you… so, would you marry me, (Name)-san?”

You take your hands to your face, that was what he wanted?! Suffering?? You just want to be with him… and now you understand Akon’s words… you are staying here, in this new world, just with and for him.

“Of course I wanna marry you, Kisuke!!!” ~

[peachy-tea-anon]

𝑊𝑖𝑙𝑏𝑢𝑟 𝑥 𝑅𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟 𝐴𝑛𝑔𝑠𝑡

𝑅𝑜𝑠𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑙𝑜𝑟𝑒𝑑 𝑔𝑙𝑎𝑠𝑠𝑒𝑠

TWs: angst, cheating, swearing, mentions of medication etc

Synopsis: Y/N has always trusted wilbur, until one day, she sees a message from another girl

R/N - Random name

While wilbur was using the restroom, you decided to pick up his phone, about to tweet a joke about hacking his twitter account. As you were typing out a tweet, you saw that he had gotten a message:

R/N ❤️

Hey babe! What time do you wanna meet up for dinner tonight?

You knew better than to snoop on your boyfriend, I mean, he had never given you a reason to be suspicious of him, right? But... she called him babe... that's a bit weird. Surely she must be a friend? A family member?

Your heart drops into the pit of your stomach as you scroll through what seems like thousands of messages, asking about date plans, good morning and goodnight texts, and lovey dovey messages you thought were special to you.

You really didn't want it to be true, but as you kept scrolling, the inevitable truth came to the surface.

𝗛𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴.

You hear him coming from the bathroom as tears pricked from your eyes, threatening to fall any moment. You quickly put his phone back in its place.

"Hey love! So, did you pick a movie?"

His tone is sickeningly sweet, making your heart wrench as if his voice was a poisoned apple coated in sugar.

"Um... actually I think im gonna head home." You say, avoiding eye contact.

When you finally bring your eyes to meet his, you see his face drop in hurt.

"How come?" He asks, sorrow filling his tone.

"Oh i just have a lot of... uh... work, to do around the house... gotta water the plants you know?" It hurt your soul to lie to his face like that.

"Okay... here, ill drive you home-"

"No need," You cut him off. "I have a train pass and I gotta use it up before it expires." You say, deadpanned.

"Oh... a-alright I guess.." he says whilst quieting his tone.

You slip off his blue jumper you were wearing, folding it neatly before handing it back to him. He seems visible shocked by this, you had always taken every chance you could to snatch his hoodies and sweaters, why was today different?

You rush to the exit of his flat, as he walks toward you to kiss you goodbye, before you turn your face making his lips land on your cheek. He lets out a small shocked noise, before saying:

"Okay... goodbye love.."

You refuse to look back at him, eyes trained to the floor.

"Bye... wilbur."

You quickly rush out of the apartment, and he is left completely dumbfounded. You always kissed him goodbye, and you never called him by his actual first name, always calling him 'love' or 'darling'.

The train ride home is a silent one, as you look out the window of the train, staring off into the rain. It was as though Mother Nature was weeping along with you.

Wilby💞

Hey love, let me know when you make it him alright.

Tears stung in your eyes at the message, as you decide to turn off your phone for the evening. Your mind fills with intrusive thoughts. No matter how much you tried to shake them away, they wouldn't disappear.

You don't sleep that night. You lay in your bed, drenching your pillows in tears and bathing in your thoughts.

The next week just follows that same routine. You had called your boss telling her that you were taking the week off because "you felt sick" so you just stay in bed all day, unable to enjoy any shows, movies, books, or anything else you would usually use to cope.

When you finally sit up to check your phone, you see hundreds of concerned messages from wilbur, as well as a few messages from coworkers asking why you weren't there that week.

With that, you shut your phone off once more, and sing back onto your pillow.

A couple of hours later, you had migrated to the couch and heard a knock at your door.

"It's always open" you say shakily, expecting it to be one of your work friends or family members.

Wilbur walks in slowly, letting out a quick sigh of relief upon realizing you were at least alive.

Seconds later, he notices all of the dirty dishes and untaken medication sweeping the counter.

"Y/N!! Oh thank goodness you're okay, you haven't replied to any messages, and I went to your work to see if you might be there, but your manager told me that you had been gone for a week, and... i wasn't sure you were still alive..."

He babbles on, your eyes staying glued to the floor once more. Finally, after his rambles, he sees your pained expression.

"What's wrong darling?? You look like you've been crying.." he goes to wipe away your dried tear stains and you pull your face away.

"Love.. why are you being like this? You always message me back, and-"

"Wilbur." You finally speak.

"Yes my love? What's wrong?? Please, tell me." He pleas.

"Who is R/N?"

His face drops. You finally make eye contact with him, and he sees your eyes fill with tears threatening to fall.

"W-what?" He questions.

"R/N. Who. Is. She." You repeat yourself.

"I-i don't know who that is, love-"

"Cut the shit wilbur. I saw it. I saw the messages, the lovey photos you send her... I saw it all."

You both sit in absolute silence.

He doesn't speak a word.

"I didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to believe that 𝑚𝑦 wilbur would be talking to someone else. But... when you constantly see someone through rose colored glasses... all of the red flags just look like flags." The tears started to fall more than ever.

"Y/N..."

"No. You don't need to say anything. I've heard all I've needed to. I was just easy enough for you to give up on. I can see that now."

"Y/N no-"

"Just leave wilbur."

"...what?"

"Leave."

"Y/N- it was just a little thing I promise- I was just being stupid and-"

"Wilbur if you don't get out of my house now, im gonna call the fucking cops and they'll 𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑒 you leave."

He surrenders with this, picking up his bag and silently walking out of the door.

Wilbur

Y/N please, don't do this. Ill break up with her I PROMISE. I was being stupid and I don't deserve you.

Please love, let me in. We can talk it out, i can make things better.

At least he was right about one thing.

He really didn't deserve you.

Haha crying rn, I haven't written angst on here before! Hope y'all enjoyed it, i might make a part 2 so comment what kind of direction you would want me to take this!! 💞

[dienamights]

Ex’s and O’s | K.Bakugou

» Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x Fem!Reader.

» Word count: 6.7K

» Genre: hurt/comfort, Smut MDNI, Prohero!au

» Summary: Its bad enough that you’re spending your ex-boyfriend’s birthday curled up in bed, wearing his merch, drinking away your sorrows, but what’s even worse is having your eardrums pierced by the blaring music upstairs at the party thrown just for him.

» Warning(s):  Smut 18+ MDNI please, hurt/comfort, mentions of alcohol, dubcon since reader is under the influence while getting dicked down, drunk sex, oral sex and fingering (female receiving, we getting fed tonight), one pussy slap lol, manipulation, unprotected sex (don’t be silly, wrap your willy)

» Author’s notes: Hello! aaaah I’m actually pretty excited about posting this fic! First of all, its Bakuhoe’s birthday! and what better way to honor it than to feed you all some good ol angst sprinkled in with some good dickin’ down. Its been years since I’ve written smut and I’m actually really fuckin proud of it, yet real nervous but I hope you enjoy! Secondly, this fic is a part of Bakugous Birthday Bash! I’m so excited to read everyone’s work, thank you everyone for holding this event and allowing my ass participate to create this with you all ♡ be sure to read everyone’s contributions, I know it’ll be more than amazing since everyone worked so hard!

Happy Birthday to our favorite King Explosion Murder♡♡

Lastly, I wanna thank everyone for their support and helping me reach 200 followers already! You guys are the cutest thing ever and I promise I’ll update more frequent the minute I’m out of uni late june fml, thank you @tteokdoroki for giggling with me when i wrote cock for the first time lol

» Masterlist | Requests

Rolling out of bed and flailing onto the floor as a start of your day ensures you that the following 24 hours will ultimately suck ass. Getting up and readying yourself for the day by looking through one of your cardboard boxes for your favorite Dynamight hoodie, the back of your mind keeps nagging you, trying to remind you of something buried deep in your subconsciousness, and you have half a heart to try and remember, because for some odd reason, you feel so fucking weary, as if the few steps from your bed to your bathroom are somehow now endless miles, almost making you breathe out in relief after finally reaching it.

And as you are making your coffee, that odd feeling keeps annoying you again, prodding at your brain to remember something, something. And ultimately, that's when your eyes fall to the counter. You knew this day was coming and you were dreading it for months, so as you look at the calendar on your kitchen counter, you frown, the quote of the day you always love reading so much long forgotten when your eyes fall on the date. 

“You’ve gotta be kiddin' me.” You mumble at the calendar on your counter hatefully with furrowed eyebrows, as if it would either reply or change its date, it doesn’t do either, and your lips curl downwards even further. As in immediate response, you pick up your phone, your coffee pot tossed aside as you dial the number of the only person you could think might help you right now.

“G’morning y/n -” you hear Kendo’s voice through your phone, and you honestly want to sob right then and there, but you hold yourself, barely and speak over her overly cheery voice first thing in the goddamn morning. “It's Kats- Bakugou’s birthday” you whimper at the slip up, being so used to the first name basis you were in with your now ex-boyfriend.

“Yeah, was kinda hoping you would’ve forgotten.” She sighs, tugging at her bangs and pulling back her phone to check the time. “Tell you what, I get off work in an hour, then I’m spending the day with you. I’ll get tequila, I know you love your shots.” 

“Ken, it's like 10 right now..” you can’t help but pout, having alcohol in your system as an escape to help you forget about the entire day still sounding better than the urge to cry and crawl into a hole, even if it's at the start of your day. “Y'know what? Get those gummy worms I like too.” “Bet.” you hang up with a sigh, moving back to the kitchen to sift through your bubble wrapped kitchen utensils, barely forcing yourself to prepare breakfast as to not have your liquor on an empty stomach.

You loathe the fact that you remembered his birthday, always reminded of him no matter how long ago since you’ve last seen him, being the center of the media’s attention for years as the number 6 hero in japan has its perks, well, in his case, but to you? Nothing but trouble and heartache as every channel you flip through plasters his face, whether it be about some big rescue mission he partook in or a new rumor about a potential lover to the explosive hero, followed by him almost attacking a reporter, yelling to them about ‘needing to mind yer goddamn business and keep my fuckin’ name outta your mouths’. Therefore, you opted long ago to stay away from the TV to avoid seeing him, his captivating rubies for eyes, covered by that goddamn mask you like to push up to his forehead, sweeping his bangs away and exposing his sweaty forehead that he bumps against yours as he makes love to you, still in his hero costume, all battered and dusty and so incredibly hot you have to- 

You grip your coffee mug tighter, almost to the point of breaking the handle off of it, placing it rather roughly onto the table before pushing your food away, appetite gone with the thought of whatever paradise you were thinking you were in before now long gone and never coming back, all because of you, of your action, of your mistake.

Kendo walks in with a bright smile on her face, as if her overly cheerful attitude will balance out the void you’re slowly but surely falling in. She shakes the bag of snacks in your face as you blink your eyes back into focus. Dragging your heavy feet across the floor to get to your kitchen to retrieve the shot glasses. Only kissing her cheek in thanks when you snatch away whatever it is she brought with her to lift your mood.

She eyes the boxes by your kitchen, the four placed haphazardly in your living room and the one you're using as a stool while filling your shot glasses, tongue sticking out to try and fill each one to the brim without spilling any on the new coffee table that she failed to notice before is still wrapped in bubble wrap that prevent any damage during the moving process.

“y/n…” you hum in response, a frown falling on your lips as the third glass spills a bit and the liquid pools on the plastic.

“Don't you think that you should’ve probably unpacked a while ago? Hasn't it been, what, five months?” 

“I didn't know you were gonna come here to harass me about my life choices, Kendo”

She flinches away, your tone venomous, almost feeling it as a slap to her face, before leaning in when she sees your eyes start to water.

“If I did, that just means it's true… that just means it happened, and I did the stupidest thing- you know what,” you wipe the few tears that managed to escape away with the sleeve of your sweater, looking down at the shots in front of you. “It, it doesn't matter anymore just- can I just drink and try to forget about how my life has gotten nothing but fucking worse since the day I left him?”

You questioned your worth that one time, that one time all those months ago. Thinking that by doing what you did and leaving, he’d drop everything and run behind you, chase after you and win you back, but he didn't, and as you sit surrounded by the evidence of how much of a failure you find out you are without him, you regret ever questioning it, ever questioning him. Because to you, living in denial was so much better than whatever hell this is.

So all you could think of is to just drown yourself in alcohol until your mind is too numb to think of the possibilities of how you could have avoided this, how you could’ve been a less of shitty person, and stop imagining how your life would be now if you just swallowed all your insecurities and just stayed. Despite the neglect, despite not being prioritized, because in some weird twisted way, those lies held you with warmth that you were never able to find after uncovering the ugly truth you’re living in right now. 

You lay on your living room floor, the alcohol swirling in your system and clouding your vision as you trace imaginary shapes in your ceiling, the voice of Kendo muffled as she rambles on and on about her day, the amount of outlaws she bitch slapped - a term she uses to get a laugh from you - and how she considers herself the unluckiest being in the whole world for having Monoma as a partner of all people, seriously contemplating who she should beat up first between him and the villains.

“Must be nice,” you voice, low and slow, scared of how Kendo would react to what you’re about to say, yet your intoxicated self unable to stop your mouth from uttering the words. “To have a purpose in life, to not be quirkless and lost like us.” your face twists in an ugly scowl at your ceiling, but mostly to yourself for putting a downer on whatever mood your friend is trying so hard to build, proven by the hitch of her breath before she enters your peripheral vision when she leans over you, all upside down and pouty.

“What’re you talki-” the shrill ringtone of her phone breaks you away from each other as she leaps to fetch it and silence the god forsaken thing by answering the call. “Battle Fist here, yes sir, I was partnered up with Phantom Thief for the patrol at area B, n-no sir I wasn’t informed.” Kendo breaths out in irritation, pinching the bridge of her nose as she starts tapping her feet aggressively on the floor, eyes falling onto yours when you look up at her all weary and sad, knowing what she would tell you once she hangs up. “That dumbass is gonna be the end of me I swear.” She crouches down to your level and kisses your forehead, promising to be back in the morning with hangover food, before she leaves and locks the door behind her. 

Now you’re left all alone, back aching from laying on the hardwood floor and eyes watering as you feel your loneliness eating you up inside, the god awful music thumbing loudly in your ears followed by the cheer of people as you-

Music?

You sit up abruptly, groaning at the dizziness of the swift movement as your hands fly to cover your ears, a failed attempt of ensuring your brain doesn’t begin to spill out from them, because of the loud voices, the bass shaking your entire fucking apartment by how strong it is, and you curse yourself for falling for the scheme the landlord pulled you in, paying half of the rent everyone did, just because you lived right below the penthouse that hosted the loudest parties in the area, 4 days out of the fucking week. 

The money hungry shameless bastard praised the apartment the minute it spiked your interest all those months ago, selling it so well you actually moved in the next week, anything to stop feeling like a burden to Kendo as you couch-surfed her apartment. Only to realize within that first week from your downstairs neighbors that he rents the penthouse to host parties of all sorts, and due to its location in the city, it was pretty popular, yet you didn’t have the money to move out again, nor the heart to concern your friend with your problems, as she was a hero with other responsibilities aside from taking care of your hopeless self.

So you get up, barely gathering yourself onto that elevator to tell off whoever the fuck will answer the door first to turn the music down. You pound the door with your fist repeatedly the minute you reach it, the door opening so suddenly you almost punch the man standing in front of you in the chest, the cool air created from the door cooling your warm cheeks as you squint at your victim for the day.

“Welcome!”

“Listen here, you buttfaced moron” you start to chew the person’s ear out, your sight blurring yet still able to notice how bright his hair is, how fiery and familiar it looks, and you’re certain you’ve seen it somewhere before. “I’m trying to drink away my regrettable life choices and cry over my ex-boyfriend, so if you would just turn down the-”

“y/n?” oh, that’s where. Your stomach drops as Kirishima looks down on you, the bright smile he flashed to whoever he was welcoming now dropped with his eyes almost bulging out at your presence, you both stand in silence, the boy unbuttoning the collar that suddenly feels like it has a chokehold on him while you cross your arms and hope the floor would swallow you a floor down back into the comfort of your home.

Kirishima basically is shutting down the second his eyes lay on you, breaking a sweat as your eyes never waver, despite how you fail to stay standing straight, what was he supposed to say? ‘Hey we’re throwing a birthday party for your ex-boyfriend because he's been feeling depressed from the day you dumped his ass’ ? No!  He wouldn’t do that to his friend, but what was he gonna say now?

Well, he didn’t have to really think about what to say to you, because his other friend didn’t hesitate to push him forward, slurring something along the lines of ‘lettin the hot ladies in so they can take a look at the prettier blond, aka moi’. In his moment of panic, the redhead stumbles forward, his cup slipping from the tips of his fingers and meeting its doom by the floor, whatever was filling it now staining your pants as you both look at the mess between you.

“Woah bro, we said you gotta get’er wet but not- '' Denki's cackle stops him from continuing whatever filth he was gonna spew out - thankfully - before his eyes drop down to your chest, or more like what was covering it. “Hey! You a Dynamight fan? Hey Bakuhoe, comere for a sec.” 

Dear God, move, for the love of all that's pure in this god forsaken world, move! Run!

All you could do is shake and breathe in short segments as your widened eyes meet his unamused ones, the garnets in his eyes glistening at your sight, he stands straight and so tall, suited up in his usual attire. Dressed for the occasion, words aren't able to describe his beauty. You try not to let your brain be dazzled by how incredibly handsome he looks. He is wearing a dress shirt, in the deep color of wine that complements his eyes, dress pants hugging his long legs, not to mention the open collar, and no tie. He looks like a long, lean Lothario. 

At that your eyes drop down to the floor, specifically the now stained carpet, your hands wrenching the end of your hoodie to distract yourself from the piercing rubies that haunts your dreams.

You build up some courage, enough of it to lift your head to continue what you came here to do, so you open your mouth, and drop a few IQs while you’re at it. “The m-music is loud and m’tryin’ to sleep,'' you mumble, noting how Kirishima leans down to make up the words you are saying over the sound of the blaring music while Bakugou narrows his eyes at you as if disregarding his sight will make him hear you better. “So, if you could turn down the heat, that’d be,” 

“You squiffed?” The blond grunts, leaning his face close to yours to inspect it, and he catches a whiff of alcohol in your breath, his eyebrows furrowing at your response. “No I'm not squinting-” 

“Yeah you’re drunk alright,” he huffs at your less than intelligent reply, pushing his glass of whiskey - you figure since it's always been his drink of choice - against Kirishima’s chest, telling him to lower the fucking volume and grabs you by your bicep. “C’mon, I’ll take you home.” you stumble at the force used against you, no matter how weak it actually is, before you barely straighten yourself to push his hand away. “I can walk down all by myself, thank you.” Of course you’d expose where you live, you dumbass.

He doesn’t question your integrity, just continues to basically drag you to the elevator before pushing your apartment door open when you choose your floor, irked to find your misplaced trust in the people of the complex by not locking your door after leaving. He barges into your bedroom and tells you to change out of your fucked up pants and proceeds to saunter to your kitchen to get you water, eyeing the boxes that he comes across during that small trip.

He stands awkwardly by the door when he sees you standing in the middle of the bedroom, sifting through countless moving boxes with your pants on the floor, thrown next to a pile of clothes that he can only assume that its supposed to be your laundry ‘basket’, until you opt against wearing any since you can't seem to find anything to replace them. And when he asks you if you just moved in, his expression sours when you shake your head no and explain to him that you’ve been living for months in this space, after chugging that cup of water like you’ve been parched for days.

“Birthday party?” You ask out of the blue as you play with the strings of your hoodie, your ears perking up at the confirmation hum you receive. “Hmm, thas’cool… I-I guess.” 

Bakugou’s impassive as he gently pushes you onto your bed, eyes meeting yours as he covers you up with your blanket. “Get some rest, I’m leaving.” He said, slowly stalking away from you and barely reaching your door as your big mouth talks on its own. Your body sitting up and facing his retreating back.

“That's what you always do, you always leave”, you utter and you see him stiffen his shoulders before he spins to face you, so fast you almost want to check up on him about getting a whiplash.

“Hah?” it's one syllable, but it shakes your very core, that one sound making you almost shake, overwhelmed by the amount of emotions, the amount of pain that one sound has. He steps closer to your bed, the stomps of his feet sounding like gun shots in your ear, and you pathetically lift up the blanket to cover yourself up, cowering behind it like it's some pseudo shield that might protect you from him.

“I’m the one that leaves?” he growls at you, his eyes sizing you up when you react to his forceful approach, leaning back to look down on you, but his lips are still curled in a frown, he tries to hold himself from blowing up at you, his feelings oddly enough still raw in his chest the moment he lay eyes on you the first time since you left, threw him away and walked away, probably finding someone better, probably finding someone who you tolerated, unlike himself, but when he sees you straighten up your back to rebuttal him, an automatic response to whenever he raised his voice at you from all those years ago, he knows he is in for a fight. 

He snarls when you nod at him, your eyes hard and glaring up at him, not knowing that your silence is by your better judgement since you don't trust your voice, knowing it’ll fail you, probably crack and show him how much he actually is affecting you by his closed off posture and demeaning look down at your frame.

“Real fuckin’ rich of ya, y/n.” He snaps back, his hands brought up to his hair, tugging at it. “As if you didn’t pack your shit,” he kicks at yet another cardboard box fucking spewed in your room, noting its heavy weight when it didn't move but an inch by his action. “Dropped your keys by the fuckin’ door,” as an emphasis, he throws your apartment key at you, making sure it doesn’t actually hit you, but falls onto your lap. “And left. Without a single fuckin’ word, like I'm some lowlife who didn't deserve an explanation, like I didn't deserve anything! And-” that hurt, goddamn it. 

Exhaling deeply, he focuses on how your eyes look a little less glossed over, a little more sober, but holding fear, and he almost steps back and out when he looks at how you’re fighting tears, almost wanting to bust his own kneecaps than to see you like this, always wanting nothing for you but to be happy, to never upset about anything no matter how small it might be.

Then why did you leave him? Left him to drown by his lonesome self, waves of his insecurities and sorrow crashing into him, pulling him even further down to his inevitable doom.

Despite the fact that you both yearn for each other, long to feel one another, engulf yourselves in the others presence. You both stand your ground, eyes glaring despite the emotions hidden behind them, mouths shut and curled into ugly scowls regardless of the words you wish to speak to each other, whispers of promises into each other's ears about being together forever, in spite of not knowing what the future holds.

Bakugou breathes out again, recalling all those months worth of coping mechanisms to exercise when placed in anger inducing situations like this one, the time in therapy spent to better himself, to control himself, to be the best version of himself, for you, hoping that one day you’ll pity him enough to want to come back, knowing full well he would never hold a grudge against you and welcome you back with open arms, intending to never repeat whatever it is he did that made you think of him as so unbearable you couldn't spent another day with him.

You on the other hand, are barely holding in the tears, wanting him to just leave your sight, so you can go back to the world of denial where he didn't look like straight out of a magazine, looking as captivating as always, as if your absence did not have an effect on the hero, of course it wouldn't, why would a quirkless extra have an effect on the great Katsuki Bakugou, that's what he used to call them, right?

“Just leave, Bakugou-” his ears pick up the way your voice breaks at his name, the way you utter it sounds so horrendous, because you aren’t meant to call him Bakugou, you’re meant to call him Katsuki, Katsu, Suki, your Suki. Not- “I hate you.”

The room suddenly spirals. The floor panels misalign themselves into zigzags. Bakugo’s eyes shatter like a glass window. He tries to hold himself against the tears that threaten to fall, stomach wrenching as if reaching from inside of his body, but it’s useless. He brings his hand up close to his chest and sinks his head, letting the words overtake him.

Oblivious to his internal struggle, you pile whatever courage you have left in another attempt to ask him to leave, aware that your body wouldn’t aid you in pushing him away physically, you open your mouth, only to gasp after a moment of silence when he pounces on you and grabs you by the neck, sliding a hand behind your head and leaning your face impossibly closer to his “you fuckin’ hate me? show me you hate me then,”

Then he's pressing his lips against yours, your half foggy mind all too surprised by the flow of motion you can only try to keep up with his feverish kisses, you try to pull away, to push him away, to no avail, Bakugou only stopping his assault on your lips to growl at them again “Show me then, hah?” 

But he wouldn't even let you, his grasp on your neck loosening to circle around your back to push you to him even more. His kisses get more and more aggressive, trying his best to show you how much he was hurt by what you said, by what you did, after all this time, almost begging you to not let him have to voice out whatever he’s feeling because he would do so much of a worse job than he is doing now.

The hands you placed on his chest in a failed attempt to push him away are now just placed over his pecs, welcoming their warmth and the way they flex under your touch, your right hand clenching over where his thumping heart is, and he almost sighs in relief, the movement feeling like it holds together all the broken pieces of his heart to make it whole again.

Almost like that gesture calmed him down, Bakugou’s rough touches start to soften, very caring as they glide to your hips before sliding underneath your - oh my God it's your special edition Dynamight hoodie! His amused chuckle tickles your lips as he pulls away when he feels you stiffen at the realization, barely letting you breathe in ease until he places his lips against your ear. “Love how m’still the only one sprawled over yer tits.”

“But I still want the real thing, lemme see ‘em, hm?” And just before throwing a dumb retort and embarrasing yourself even further, the article is tugged eagerly off of your body and thrown haphazardly on the floor. Earning yourself a low whistle when he realises you’re wearing nothing underneath. Bakugou all but shoves you onto the bed, spreading your legs when you try to rub them against each other for any friction, wedging his body neatly between them as his teeth gently bite your soft buds, pulling them slightly before captivating the nipple entirely.

His tongue flicks against your hardening nipple while keeping a watchful eye at the sinful expressions your face makes, his one hand toying with and twisting the other nipple while the other slides down to tease your needy cunt, pressing his fingers against your -fucking soaked- panties, swearing under his breath at the feeling of your walls trying to clench around his fingers just from that one movement. Sitting on his haunches, he lifts your hips with ease to pull your panties right off, eyes travelling between your heaving chest and your exposed pussy. Before lowering himself and finding comfort in biting and sucking your nipples again.

Bakugou’s smirk grows with your moans as his tongue dances over your sensitive nipples, he presses his finger against your walls, and you immediately keen at the prodding feeling that almost feels foreign after all this time apart. His thumb pushing your pussy lip to the side to see you suck his finger in like the good girl he knew you always were.

“Ba-ba-ba,” you struggle to talk, your drool collecting at your lips, stopping you from forming any words as you feel a breeze hit your spit covered tits, whining at the feeling and wanting him to pull your nipples in the warm cavern of his mouth again. Bakugou’s eyes focus on the spit line connecting his bottom lip to your nipple before disconnecting it to smash his lips against yours in an effort to shut your blabbering up.

“Ba-ba, what? y’better not be callin’ me Bakugou with my fingers deep in yer pussy baby, its Katsuki for you, yeah?” he taunts with a fake pout that immediately turns into a grin at the way you hold your pathetic sobs, pressing another finger in your tight cunt, reveling in the wet sounds your pussy makes as he thrusts his fingers in and out of it, soaking his fingers in your slick as he curls them, eager to hear the squelching sounds it would make when his cock is shoved deep inside you. “Or better yet, lemme hear you say Suki, hmm?”

“Suki- p-please, eat me out” you throw your head back and bring your hands down to play with your clit, showing him where you want his lips to be, as if the blond doesn't already know where it is, and he scoffs at the thought, slapping your hand away and giving another slap to your clit, earning a moan from you from the sharp pleasurable pain.

“Yea, yea I fuckin’ know already, needy slut,” he growls, keeping eye contact as he circles your clit with his tongue before sloppily eating out your cunt, making a mess of both drool and your arousal, mumbling “my needy slut.” to himself, and you do hear it, yet you brush it off with the thought that your lust must be messing with your brain.

Your chest still flutters at his words and your walls clench in on his fingers as he curls them again in a way you didn’t know would make you yelp like it did. He thrives off of how your body responses so easily to him, your back arching and the squelching getting louder as his fingers pick up speed, his tongue so skillful in drawing circles around your clit before sucking it again. A whine escapes you when he draws his head away from you, only for you to see the way his eyes darkens, his chin glistening from your arousal when it catches the light.

“Let go for me princess,” he whispers uncharacteristically, making you question if the glint in his eyes is from his desire for you or something else. “Lemme see you fall apart for me, alright?” the way he’s almost begging you to come undone for him takes you by surprise, and your body curls in on itself so fast, not realizing your orgasm was creeping up on you until it hits you. The knot in your stomach breaks as you gush around his fingers, white crossing your vision as he slows his pace to help you come down from your high. 

Your shuddering body lays on your bed, eyes unwavering as they meet Katsuki’s, his fingers stuffed in his mouth as he moans around them at your taste. It's all a blur after seeing that unravel, and you’re so woozy that you don’t register him discarding his clothes until he lays above you. Placing himself between your legs as he pumps his cock, hardened from seeing you fall apart on his tongue and fingers, his tip leaking precum and burning a bright red.

His movement is almost too quick for you as he dips his head into your leaking hole before pulling right back, a breathless chuckle escaping him when you whine and roll your hips and try to suck him in again, wanting to feel the stretch of him inside of you.

“Didja wanna say somethin’ princess?” he taunts you, one of his hands holding you down by your stomach while the other is wrapped around his length, teasing you in the ways that he knows drive you crazy, he leans in, using the tip of his cock to spread your pussy lips open and running it along your slit to coat it with your arousal.

“Katshu, p-please I-” you hiccup, your fists tightening on your bed sheet as you try to rock your hips up get more than just his leaking tip, but your begging is always interrupted when he isn't hearing what he wants you to say.

“Say you love me.”

You freeze at his demand, your widening eyes looking up at him before you pout your lips, not thinking about surrendering to him, no matter how much you want your cunt stuffed full of him right now.

“I don’love yooou-” you gasp as katsuki’s grip onto your waist tightens and you feel as he gives a thrust into your sopping cunt, arching your back at the burning stretch of being filled up by his thick cock. Katsuki’s hand traces down your left thigh before cupping behind your knee, hiking your leg up and out, close to your chest to expose more of yourself to him, wanting nothing more than to see his dick seething in and out of your tight pretty pussy, and by almost muscle memory, you did the same thing with your right leg, replacing his hands with your own, presenting yourself to him.

“Y’see that? Fuckin’ know you like the back of m’hand, y’think someones gonna- ah, take the fucking time to work you like I did?” he's right, absolutely right, he ruined you for any other potential lovers and he loved it with every fiber in his being, knowing this means you’re always going to be wrapped around his finger. You moan as he pushes more of himself into you, bottoming out and holding one of your tits and squeezing when he feels your walls do the same to his cock.

You hate it, after all this time, you’re still a blubbering mess the second he was one fucking inch deep in your pussy, sucking him in and clawing at his back begging for more. No self respect, no dignity, you hate it, how come after all this time he gets to come here and fuck you like you belong to him, like you’ve belonged to him despite everything that has happened.

You only realize that your eyes are closed when Katsuki’s breath hits your face, and you open them wide, noting how wet your lashes have gotten from your tears, only for him to kiss at the tears gliding along your right temple and licking the ones on your left. He breathes out a chuckle and when he leans to look at your eyes, the humor and menace you expect to see in his eyes are nowhere to be found, clouded by a solemn look instead.

“What? Yer cryin on me now, huh? Y’think a few tears are stoppin’ me?” His voice is masked so well, because he sounds like he was simply enjoying a game, like an imp that had branched from a demon. “C’mon, not gonna tell the birthday boy you love’em?”

“I don't love you, I hate you, h-hate you-” you keen as drool pools at your lips, your body betraying you as it shakes from pleasure, letting go of your legs to wrap them around his slim waist, to bring him in closer, if that was even possible, stopping his deep thrusts that were brushing up against your cervix, it feels pathetic, denying him the pleasure of telling him you love him while clinging onto him like he's your last breath of fresh air, because in a way, you feel like he is, like him leaving would just collapse your lungs and stop your heart from beating, you know that he’s gonna leave you. While your spent body would lay on your bed and you'd cry because you didn't tell him you love him, yet you wouldn’t ask him to stay, knowing deep down that you don't deserve it, you don't deserve him.

You feel his weight on top of you as he rests his elbows by your head, his lips brushing against your ear as he repeats again with every shallow thrust into your warm insides, his cock twitching from time to time in your walls. “You love me.” he says it once, twice, thrice. Every time his voice lowers more and more to a broken whisper, almost a plea instead of the cocky taunt he started off with.

Your legs are starting to ache from the grip they have around him, so you loosen up, your mind easy since his thrusts haven’t been rough nor painful. And when you do, you notice two things immediately, first, your thighs are so soaked from how he's making you feel, probably ruining your bedsheet at this point, second, he pushed his chest away from yours to look you directly in the eyes, one hand molding around your thigh to keep it from wrapping around him again while the other is placed on your stomach, his thumb inching closer and closer to your clit, wanting to toy with it, toy with you, but not ready to give you any satisfaction until you admit to him, please just tell him, that you do still love him. All insecurities, all battle scars, all emotional constipation as layers he covers himself with, that no one gives a fuck to peel off, to see who he really was, except you.

His red eyes lock onto yours as your chest heaves with breathless sobs at the lost of his warmth, and when you think he's lowering himself back down, he pulls out suddenly, sending a  shiver down your spine as you gasp, now feeling like you're frozen over, your tears coming from lack of both pleasure and warmth.

Suddenly your face is met with the pillow and you feel his hands on your hips as he lifts them up and off the bed, your half intoxicated, half aroused mind barely registering that you’ve been flipped over on your stomach until you feel his cock prodding at your cunt, easily sliding in like they’ve been made to be warmed up in there, when you know Katsuki would argue that your pussy was made just for him and to warm his dick.

He presses his chest against your back, pushing you onto the bed as he thrusts his hips roughly, pulling out fully before seething himself right back in, your moans and whimpers muffled by your pillow from being pushed down by his hand as his other holds your hips firmly. 

Then what happened next probably shocked him more than you, despite how delirious you’ve become due to his relentless thrusting, his dripping tears feel cool on your bare warm shoulder, one by one as his groans and moans turn into strangled sobs, before Katsuki digs his teeth into that shoulder, to both hear you scream and to muffle his cries from you. 

“because I love you” he sobs, detaching his teeth from their grip and kissing the bite marks before resting his forehead against it, but his thrusts never cease, getting sloppier, as if the confession is pushing him off the edge. Dragging the tip of his nose from your bitten and bleeding shoulder to the back of your ear, his own face flush and warm against you as he breathes harshly against your ear and kisses along it.

“So-” he moans again, the hand behind your neck now turning your face so he could see your fucked out expression, the tears streaming down your face and the drool that pools under your cheeks, with your tongue lolled out and your eyes barely focusing on his form.

“You better say you do too, becau-”

“I love you.” you gush, like saying it is a breath of fresh air, your eyes never leaving his teary ones, your gaze so intense and fixated on him with no regards to the way the snapping of his hips against yours is shaking your entire body against the bed. 

With new found vigor from your confession, Katsuki grabs onto the meat of your ass, hammering into you from behind with force that pushes you against the bed even further, your pulled hair jerking your head back so he can listen to the lewd noises you are making, long forgotten the will to cover your pleasure and hiding your moans.

Your ass heavily slaps against his thighs as he grabs your hips with both hands and pounds into your sopping wet cunt, relishing in the way you’re begging for him. “Y’like it when I fuck you baby, hmm? Like it when I stuff you so fuckin’ full of me?” He growls, feeling you push your ass back every time you repeat ‘yes’ to his questions. “Yes, yes love it, love you, please please don’t stop, please ‘Suki. Yes, gonna cum ‘Suki please” you weep, your head pounding from the grip he had on your hair and your eyes crossing as you feel his thrusts stutter, getting sloppier when you bounce your ass against him, his hand coming down and slapping it.

“That's fuckin’ right, cum on this cock, c’mon baby” he brings four of his fingers to rub your clit with urgency, and you can’t help but arch your back as your orgasm hits you again, screeching as you feel your walls tightening on him, squeezing him for what he’s worth. “F-fuck ah, y-you’re so- Fuck” his heavy weight falls on you as he fills you to the brim with his milky seed, forehead pressed against your shoulder as he rocks his hips against you, pushing more of his load inside before slowly pulling out, gaze flutters down to where your bodies were once joined, seeing your mixed arousal seeping out of your hole and he has half a mind to push it back in with his fingers.

But he flips you over effortlessly, the sight of your crossed out eyes and wet cheeks squeezing his chest at the realization he might’ve been too rough on you, so he wipes your cheek with the palm of his hands and revels in the way you lean towards him, turning your face to kiss his palm. “Say it again.” barely a whisper, as you flip his hand and kiss the back of it as well, and he almost repeats himself, thinking you didn’t hear him, but your hands reach up and cup his face, bringing him towards you. “I love you Katsuki” and goddamn if that wasn’t the most beautiful thing you’ve ever spoken. “Again,” “I love you, Katsuki” “Again,” you giggle, and he knows that's probably what angels sound like.

Your thumb brushes over his warm cheeks, red from showing vulnerability, and you pull him even closer, “Happy birthday, ‘Suki.”

“Yea,” He breaths out, his lips barely brushing against your bitten and bruised ones. “It really fuckin’ is.”

aaaaaaaaah! Hope you enjoyed it! Lemme know what you think of the smut, I also changed my writing style from past tenses to present tenses or tried to at least

Borrowers (taglist):

if you want to be tagged with for any of my fics let me know ♡

[raziroo]

Ma

Pairing: Naruto Uzumaki x motherfigure!reader

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: None, as far as I recall

Word count: 1398

Author's Note: Y'all i suck at titles i was so close to just naming this shit The Smile™. anywho enjoy this piece of motherly love churned out in like forty minutes.

She remembered how she’d found him. There was only the smallest crowd surrounding him, murmurs and whispers flitting back and forth. She’d been on her way to get groceries, initially ignoring the group of people herself, when the name ‘Naruto’ attracted her attention.

Naruto. Minato and Kushina’s son.

Instantly she’d stopped in her tracks, changing directions as to investigate what exactly was up. And oh, the condition the boy was in was enough to tug at her heartstrings - gashes and bruises were scattered across his body, peeking out from under the torn tatters of his clothes; blood seeped from his nose, his split lip, the multiple cuts his body had.

Shifting the bag so that it hung on her shoulder, the woman lifted the frail, clearly undernourished child up, and paying no heed to the villagers who were clearly appalled at the sight in front of them, she’d hurried to Konoha’s hospital.

It was while she paid for his medical expenses did the woman decide – she wouldn’t trust the poor child at the Hokage’s hands. However great a Kage may be, in the end of the day, he too was nothing at the hands of the people and politics. The villagers of the Leaf were bent on not accepting the boy solely because he was a Jinchuriki; a fate bestowed upon him by the Fourth Hokage, his father, the man the village worshipped. It truly was strange seeing all these mature adults resent a mere toddler just because he had the Kyuubi sealed inside of him. They didn’t realise that he was protecting them in a manner ever so sacrificial; they didn’t care that the Nine Tails would probably harm the boy more than it would ever them.

He’d woken up (jumped up, rather), began pestering her with questions. It was truly so sorrowful; the boy couldn’t – he simply wouldn’t – believe that someone would actually try to help him. When she’d told him that he was going to be living with her from then on, that she would be his guardian; oh, the sheer, unadulterated joy on his face shook the woman to her core. In all her years, in her entire thirty-three-year lifespan, never had the female witnessed an expression so pure – his euphoria shone through the shocked look on his face, and then through the face-splitting grin he wore.

He’d hugged her. She’d been surprised. After all, no child, even a four-year-old, hugged a stranger this freely.

She’d hugged him back anyways.

“Well, introduce yourself. It’s bad manners not to.”

“I’m Naruto Uzumaki, believe it! I’m going to become Hokage someday, you’ll see! The strongest Hokage ever!

“Oh?”

“Yes! I’ll save the village, and then its people will give me ramen!”

“Oh… you’re quite ambitious. Very determined too. I’m sure you’ll be Hokage, but for now, why don’t we get you something to eat? What would you like?”

“Ramen!”

She remembered the first time he’d called her ‘ma’. He’d been seven-years-old. She’d been putting him to bed, telling him fables of the Yondaime Hokage and his adventures. She hadn’t thought it wise to tell him that she’d been a mentor of his. That was a tale for another time.

She had crossed the threshold when she heard the little child’s voice call out to her.

“Yes, Naruto?”

“…Who were my parents? What were they like?”

“…”

“I - I’m sorry if you don’t wanna say it!”

“Your parents, Naruto, were two of the kindest, bravest people I’ve met. Your father was very charming, and your mother was beautiful. They were like prince and princess.”

“Oh. So… if they were prince and princess, then what am I?”

“Well, that would make you a prince, won’t it? When a prince and princess grow up, they become king and queen. So you’re prince.”

“Oh. You’re so intelligent! So you’re a queen too then?”

“Well… that depends. Would you want me to be queen?”

“Yes! I’m the prince, and the mother of a prince is a queen, isn’t she?”

“…Do you think of me as your mother, Naruto?”

“Of course! You take care of me, make food for me, buy clothes for me, tell me stories, put me in bed at night. That’s everything a mother does!”

“…”

“You’re my Ma, believe it!”

She’d kissed him goodnight. She might have shed a tear or two, too.

She remembered all their friendly banter. The quarrels over ramen, how she’d become a little stern, how he’d apologise fervently.

“Ma?”

“Mm-hm?”

“Can we have ramen for dinner today? Please?”

“Didn’t we have ramen for lunch yesterday? You can’t eat that all the time, you need to eat other stuff too, you know. Vegetables, fish, rice, miso -”

“But none of it is as good as ramen!”

“Really? You think so?”

“Yes! Believe it!”

“I do believe you, you knucklehead. But since you value ramen over my healthy, home cooked food, why don’t you make food for the rest of the week?”

“…Hah? No! Ma, I was kidding, believe it! Please, your food is great, it’s the best!”

“…Better than ramen, then?”

“Well, no, but -!”

She remembered when he left the village for training with Jiraiya. She couldn’t help but compare the scene of Naruto beside Jiraiya to Minato beside Jiraiya.

“Don’t be sad at all Ma! I’m gonna get stronger after training with Pervy Sage, and I’m gonna bring back Sasuke, believe it! I’ll save him from Orochimaru, that bastard -”

“Language, Naruto.”

“Sorry! But anyways, I’m gonna go now. Goodbye, Konoha! I know you’ll miss me! Bye, M – Ma? Ma, what -?”

“It’s nothing, you idiot. I’m your mother, aren’t I? Can’t I hug my boy goodbye?”

She remembered when he’d encountered Sasuke and Orochimaru.

“I was useless, Ma, useless! I couldn’t do a thing! I preached of bringing him back, but in the end, I turned out to be nothing but a pathetic loser who can’t even save his own friend! How am I ever gonna become Hokage?!”

“…”

“…Ma…?”

“…”

“…”

“Naruto, did you know I was part of ANBU?”

“W – wha -?”

“While my time there, I had many a companion, many a comrade. I remember them all to this day. There was one, though, one shinobi who stood out among all of us. When any of us would doubt ourselves, would try to blame ourself for a mission’s failure, he smacked us across the face. Be it girl or boy, he did not tolerate self-doubt and deprecation at any cost. He said that if we wished to be worthy shinobi, then pride mattered. If there was something that each and every human shares, it’s the sense of dignity and self-respect. No matter how big or how scarce, everyone has that. He taught me to never let my dignity be stripped of me. Because in the end, even when a man has nothing, he can always hold onto dignity. People who lose their sense of self and self-respect end up becoming like that Kabuto Yakushi. Don’t you ever, Naruto, ever think that you’re not worthy. You, my child, are the bravest, most kind-hearted shinobi I’ve met. It’s understandable that you’d feel weak after defeat at the hands of someone you call a rival, but I can assure you, you will bring Sasuke back. That’s something you can quote me on.”

She remembered how devastated and grief stricken he'd been when Jiraiya died, and how she had hugged him the tightest she'd ever hugged anyone. She remembered how he’d saved her, the Hokage, his friends and so many others when Pain had attacked. She remembered how he’d saved the village over and over. How he’d brought Sasuke back. How he’d rescued Hinata from the moon. How he’d come out victorious against Madara Uchiha, for God’s sake.

She remembered feeling struck when he’d smiled at her on his wedding day. Her boy had grown up, become tall, mature, become a man. But when he smiled at her, all she saw was the four-year-old whom she’d announced to that he was going to live with her.

It hadn’t been much of a surprise when that same blinding smile adorned his features when he had Boruto.

It was expected of him to smile at her that way when he had Himawari.

She felt so proud of him when he gave her the smile when he became Hokage.

Truly, her boy had grown up. He was the strongest shinobi to ever live, surpassing the God of Shinobi, his Master, his father.

Naruto Uzumaki. Her son.

[the-cult-of-russo]

No Going Back

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader 

Request : good morning. i wanna request number 8.  “Maybe you should just leave now.” angst/fighting dialogue. to be correct it is for billy russo right?

A/N: yes it's my Billy boy :') he a lil soft in this though but also an asshole lmaooo not gonna lie, this one had me swept up in the emotion. It hit quite close to home and now I'm sad :') 

Warnings: cursing, angst, sadness and heartbreak. Billy fucked up big time lol

Your hands were shaking as you slammed the door to your apartment. Tears stained your cheeks and you kicked your heels off before storming to your bedroom, grabbing a duffel bag and starting to pack his things that he'd left around. Heartbroken didn't even cover it. 

You knew this would happen, it's why you fought against it for so long. But you were stupid and ended falling for his bullshit and now you were a mess. 

You and Billy had been together officially for 7 months. You'd met a year ago at a bar and hit it off, but when he tried to take you home you'd denied him. That apparently piqued his interest even more. He'd always be at the bar every Friday when you went and it was always easy to just be yourself around him. You didn't take him up on his offer and he would offer every time. He never made it a secret that he wanted you. 

But as the months drew on, you both got to know each other more and it became a sort of friendship. You had to admit you felt something when you looked forward to seeing him. He'd asked you once why you were so against it and you'd been pretty blunt with him. You knew of his reputation and you weren't into it. You didn't do one night stands or casual sex. You wanted a relationship, someone to settle down with. You wanted something real. You told him you didn't think he was capable of that and he'd break your heart. 

Five months into knowing each other and he'd switched from just wanting to fuck you to wanting to actually date you and you'd still put up a fight. But as your feelings for him grew, he wore you down. The moment you agreed to that date, which he'd been over the moon about, everything changed. 

It had been so easy to be with him. He treated you like a queen, was more affectionate than you'd have thought, and you enjoyed each other's company. He was busy with Anvil a lot so you didn't see him every day but he'd call if he couldn't see you or send you sweet texts. He swore to you up and down that he'd never hurt you, never do what you'd thought he would do when you turned him down all those times. 

You'd see the looks women gave him when you went out together or were at an event as his date and sometimes you'd feel insecure. But he only had eyes for you it seemed and it reassured you. It lulled you into a false sense of security that he'd actually changed. That he actually cared about you. 

But you were wrong. So very fucking wrong and now you were paying for it. You'd been having dinner with a friend you hadn't seen in a while when it happened. Your eyes finding Billy across the restaurant. He was sat with a pretty blonde, very up close and intimate as they whispered god knows what to each other. You'd felt your heart crack but tried to deny it. It was just flirting, nothing more. But then… he'd leaned in and kissed her. 

You'd shot out of your seat so fast the chair fell over and ran out of the place like someone had lit a fire up your ass. And you knew he'd seen you because you heard him shouting your name as you jumped into a cab and left. 

You hated yourself for being surprised at what he'd done. You'd told him this was exactly how it would go but he'd swore to you. And you allowed yourself to buy into his bullshit because you loved him. 

Most of his things packed, you padded over to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of wine, pouring a large glass. You swigged it in one and felt the warmth bloom in your chest. It did little to ease the hopeless sorrow that consumed you though. 

There was a rough knock at your door and you heard Billy call your name loudly. You tensed, heart breaking all over again as the tears seemed to be never ending. You didn't want to talk to him, to even look at him. But this was it. You couldn't stay with him, not now. You'd never be able to trust him again. You knew you had to tell him it was done so you could lick your wounds and heal from the pain. 

"Y/N, please… open the door," Billy begged from the other side. You walked over, unlocking it but not opening it as you stormed back off to your bedroom. You knew he'd let himself in. You heard his heavy footsteps entering as you shoved another of his shirts in the bag, one you liked to sleep with.

"Can we talk?" He asked hesitantly. 

"No," you bit out, eyes snapping to him. His face fell when he saw you crying and he took a tentative step into the room.

"Please, Y/N, let me explain," he frowned. You laughed but it held no joy. Only a deep rooted pain that was latched onto your soul. 

"Explain? Really? What, you gonna say you tripped and your mouth landed on hers?! I saw it with my own eyes, Billy! You don't need to explain anything!" You roared, pure pain lacing your words.

He clenched his jaw as he shook his head, eyes glassy as he stared at you. 

"I'm-I'm sorry," he started softly,  reaching out to grab your arm but you smacked it away harshly. He looked like a kicked puppy and you hated it. He didn't get to be upset about this. 

"How long have you been fucking her then?" You asked snidely as you grabbed the duffel bag, holding it in a death grip. 

"I haven't fucked her," he muttered quietly. You snorted deprecatingly and he bit down on his lower lip.

"Yet?" You asked knowingly. His guilty glance to the floor told you everything you needed to know. 

"How long, Billy? How long have you been cheating on me?" You asked, your voice wavered but your gaze had nothing but fire in it and he shifted where he stood. He couldn't look at you. 

"A month. It was always one night, I never went back to someone," he frowned. Pain clawed its way through your chest and you threw the bag at him hard. He caught it but stumbled a little and he looked at you forlornly. 

"Well, I guess that makes it better then, right?" You asked coldly and he flinched. 

You stormed past him back to the kitchen area and he followed quickly. 

"Please listen to me, Y/N. I need to make this right," he pleaded desperately. You whirled around to face him, face flushed and tear stained and you felt like you wanted to scream. 

"Why? Why did you just decide after 6 months together to do this to me? You promised me, Billy! I knew this would happen but you fought for this! For us! Why?! Just so you could break my heart?!" You bellowed, a mix of anger and utter despair in your tone. 

His lower lip quivered and he bit down on it, staring at the floor.

"I never wanted to hurt you. I swear, I didn't. I just…" his voice cracked as his teary eyes landed on you. 

"Maybe you should just leave now," you uttered. Your whole body was trembling and you felt sick. You couldn't stand to look at him. He stepped closer to you, dropping the bag on the floor but you took a step back. It would be far too easy to fall for his bullshit again and if he touched you, you didn't think you'd be able to get him to leave. 

It felt like pure pain ripped through your chest, the weight of the world crashing down around you. You slumped onto a dining chair as a raw sob clawed its way out. Billy was kneeling in front of you in seconds, his own cheeks now damp as he cupped your cheeks. You moved your head from his grip and shook your head. 

"I loved you, you know that?" You whispered brokenly though your tears. You'd never outright said it, mostly in fear of his reaction. But it had all gone to shit anyway. His lip trembled again, scrunching his nose up a little as he shook his head. He looked utterly devastated and it made you angry so you continued.

"I loved you with everything I had. I trusted you with my life. I ripped out my own beating heart and willingly gave it to you because you swore to me you wouldn't do this. You just took it and stomped all over it. How could you do this to me?" Your last words were strained as the tears flowed freely.

"Please let me fix this," he begged helplessly. He was crying openly now, not trying to hide it as he gazed at you from the floor. 

"You can't fix it. I'll never be able to trust you again. It's not just the sex, Billy! You've been lying to me for a month. All those business meetings or times you were away? And you just… you'd come back to me with a smile and tell me sweet words. Looked me in the fucking eye and not feel guilty," you choked out. He shook his head vigorously, hands clasping yours so tight you couldn't pull them away.

"You've got no idea how guilty I felt. It's been eatin' me up from the inside out," he lamented.

"Why would you…? What was it? You just got bored of me? Decided you didn't want me anymore? You should have just ended this because it would hurt less than this," you wept pitifully. He shook his head, clutching your hands tighter.

"Don't… Don't say that, I do want you. I know I don't deserve you, I know I'm an asshole. And… and maybe I shoulda left it alone when you told me this would happen, but I was selfish and I-I couldn't. You were never like the others. I knew that from the moment we met. But then… then things were gettin' serious and I just… I freaked out and went back to my default 'cause I didn't know how to…'' he cried, screwing his face up as he hung his head. 

You sobbed as you stood, his hands falling away and you moved to lean against the table as he stood. 

"It would be bad enough if I'd just got with you in the first place and you did this. But I wanted to avoid this. I tried so hard but you kept on at it. And it hurts so much more because you promised me you wouldn't do this and I believed you. I thought you'd changed, that you…" you ran a hand through your hair, tugging on it as the tears wouldn't stop.

He stepped to you, grasping your face in both hands and you couldn't bring yourself to fight it despite the pain it brought you. His endless eyes were all consuming, his cheeks wet from his own tears.

"Please… please, Y/N, don't do this. Let me make it right," he begged tearfully. 

"Without trust, we have nothing. Everytime you're on your phone I'd wonder if you were talking to another woman. When you're out I'd be paranoid about who you were with. I can't live like that, Billy. I can't live my life in… in an anxious, jealous haze. That's not a relationship," you whispered. 

He made a pained noise and it squeezed your heart so hard you thought it might implode. 

"I was never good enough for you. I knew that. But I wanted… I wanted to try and be-be a good man… for you. And I fucked up so bad and I just…" his words trailed off into a hopeless sob and you squeezed your eyes shut. You wished there was a way to fix this but there wasn't. You wouldn't be in one of those relationships without trust. Checking your partner's phone and always checking in. It would break you.

"You need to leave, Billy," your words were a mere breath and his hands on your face tightened for a moment before they fell to his sides. He looked completely broken and you were sure you looked the same. He opened his mouth before promptly closing it, his jaw ticking as he moved away and pushed the heels of his palms to his eyes. 

You wrapped your arms around yourself like it would protect you from the pain and glared at the floor. You could still feel his gaze burning into you. You glanced at him as he grabbed the bag and slung it over his shoulder. You had to fight the urge to grab onto him as he walked to your door. You felt like you were dying. 

He grabbed the handle but stopped, not looking at you as his body tensed.

"I want you to know… I love you too," his pained words felt like a punch to the gut and you covered your mouth with a hand but it did little to stop the noise that left your lips. He looked over his shoulder at you, still holding the door handle.

"I know that… right now you probably don't believe me, but I do. And I'm sorry. I-I never wanted you to get hurt. You deserve so much better," he muttered despondently. With that, he opened the door and slipped out of your apartment. Of your life. 

You fell to the floor as heaving sobs left your chest. It would have been easier if he came here being an asshole. Cold and emotionless like you knew he could be at times. But seeing him, his emotions so raw and on display, it cut you deeper than any knife could. And you believed him. You knew him well enough to believe that he fell in love with you and freaked out. You knew it would happen which is why you'd turned him down at the start. You believed he never wanted to hurt you. And you wished you could forgive him. You saw how much it hurt him too but you couldn't. You couldn't get over the betrayal and you didn't think you ever could. 

He'd sabotaged what you both had because of his inability to deal with what he felt and the bitter knowledge that if he'd just accepted it, how different your future would be with him, it left a sour taste in your mouth. Billy had opened up to you a lot in your time together about his past and you knew how much it had messed him up. You knew it left him struggling with emotions and relationships and you felt for him. For the lost boy who'd never felt love and didn't know how to cope with it. But nothing could erase the heartbreak. The hurt that he'd given you. Because even if you'd one day be able to forgive him, you'd never be able to forget.

[stressy-enby]

Hello! So here's my request:

The 1-A girls including reader are having a girls night in one of their dorms playing Minecraft (teaching Momo how to play for the first time), giving out study tips, eating snacks and watching movies, etc... When their in a topic about their crushes and reader shyly tells them it is Tenya Iida... While the girls are shocked and ask a lot of questions why iida much to reader whos not really liking the questions, the girls decided to help reader out by setting both iida and reader on a date by grabbing readers phone and texting iida, much to readers protest and what the girls don't know is that the boys are having a boy night at the common room too and doing the exact same thing, helping iida out to finally ask reader on a date.

so yeah, haha that's all and you can add your own ideas there and can this be a oneshot? I also want to see the perspective of iida if that't possible? I hope this is okay? thank you!! ☺

Took a few liberties, included some personal touches, I’m really happy with how this came out and I hope you are too!

Risks

Masterlist

Weekend nights in Heights Alliance were arguably the best. 

Mr. Aizawa was more flexible about curfew on Friday and Saturday nights, so the class took those nights as opportunities to have slumber parties and late night get-togethers. 

This was one such night. You, Ochaco, Tsu, Momo, Toru and Kyoka had gone to Mina’s dorm room with snacks and games in hand. Your hostess had offered up her wide selection of video games and her Netflix, Hulu, and Disney+ accounts. Toru had even come through with an impressive assortment of face masks, nail polish, and hair accessories. Needless to say, everyone was more than set for a night of careless fun.

“Wait, how do I craft something?” Mom held her controller out to Kyoka, brows pinched together.

“This button, here,” she took the controller, demonstrating by crafting an axe.

Upon realization that Momo had next to no knowledge of Minecraft, the party had abandoned its Super Smash Bros. tournament in favor of showing her the ropes. You’d vowed to help her make a simple house by the end of the night.

“Pro tip: make sure you collect all the same type of wood.” You suggested, eyes focused on the white stripes you were attempting to paint onto Tsuyu’s light green nails with some success. 

“Yeah, unless it’s on purpose, like if you use a different wood for the roof or floor, it’s just gonna look like you hobbled it together in less than a minute.” Mina agreed, before promptly shoving a handful of popcorn into her mouth.

Ochaco gasped playfully, swiping the bowl away. “Don’t eat all of it!”

“I’ll eat whatever I damn well please!” Mina retorted, making a grab for the snack as Ochaco floated it over to Toru.

“Okay guys, I can’t take it anymore.” The invisible girl grabbed the bowl out of the air. “We’re all together, hanging out with zero stress for the first time in months! Does anyone have anything juicy to share? Someone’s gotta have something!”

Kyoka rolled her eyes. “I don’t know about the rest of you, but I didn’t come to gossip.”

“This class is a pretty tight-knit group, ribbit. Nothing really happens that we don’t all know about.” Tsu pointed out.

“Okay then. Crushes.” Mina prompted.

“What about them?” Momo asked.

“Who’s got ‘em?”

There was a moment of silence. You noticed how a few pairs of eyes flicked to Ochaco, who had gonna very red and very quiet. You sighed, musing to yourself about the things you did for friendship.

“I, uh, I kinda like Iida?”

You hated how you phrased it like a question. You hated how you mitigated the confession with the word “kinda”. You hated that silly, totally inadequate word “like”. Your feelings for Iida went beyond a simple crush. You’d had them for him for months now, you were long past the “like” phase. You were head-over-heels in love.

Toru gasped dramatically. “Really? Iida?”

Ochaco smiled at you, gratitude evident in her eyes. “You two would make a sweet couple.”

“What do you like about him?” Mina asked excitedly. “When did you fall for him? Are you gonna confess?”

“Take it easy,” Kyoka chuckled lightly.

You also laughed, albeit uneasily. You were beginning to regret not keeping your mouth shut. “Okay, I’ll take those one at a time. He’s kind and attentive, and he’s very loyal. I think I realized that I liked him a few weeks after the sports fest, and absolutely not.”

“Why don’t you want to tell him?” Momo asked, pursing her lips. “I think he’d appreciate the honesty.”

“Be that as it may, I don’t wanna make things weird between us or potentially ruin our friendship.” You explained “I don’t wanna jeopardize what we have now by confessing.”

“Plus, Iida doesn’t seem like the kind of guy who’s want to date someone, ribbit.” Tsu put in, examining her newly painted nails. “He’s very serious. He’d probably see it as a distraction, these are really pretty, (Y/N), thank you.”

You smiled weakly at your frog-like friend as Toru threw a piece of popcorn at her head. “Tsu!”

“No, she’s right.” You sighed heavily, motioning for the popcorn bowl, intending to drown your sorrows and maybe yourself in it.

“I’m sorry, (Y/N).” Momo patted your back sympathetically as she passed the bowl down. “I can’t imagine how frustrating it is.”

You hummed in agreement as you shoveled the snack into your mouth. “Whatever. It sucks, bur I’ll get over it.”

“Like hell you will!” Mina snapped “Ochaco: our romantically challenged friend’s phone, if you please?”

Ochaco dutifully and bemusedly took your phone from Mina’s bedside table and handed it over to her.

“What are you doing?” You questioned, suddenly on high alert.

You were ignored. Mina instead took your hand, and placed your thumb over the home button on your phone, unlocking it.

“Seriously, what are you doing?” Kyoka asked.

“Texting Iida.”

It took you a few seconds to process her words and what they meant. Once you had, though, you made a sudden grab for the phone. “Oh no you’re not!”

“Chillax, I’m not gonna send him anything embarrassing.” Mina swatted your hand away as she scooted safely out of your reach. “I’m just gonna suggest that you two go out sometime and heavily imply that it’ll be a date.”

“Now hold on,” Momo cut in, setting down her controller. “We shouldn’t be interfering. This is between (Y/N) and Iida.”

“Yeah, if (Y/N) wants to ask him out, they’ll do it themselves, ribbit.” Tsu chimed in.

Mina sighed, slumping. “I know you’re both right, but I can’t just let them wallow! Iida really likes you, (Y/N)!”

“Oh yeah?” You raised both eyebrows.

“Yeah! He’s a lot softer with you then with anyone else!”

“He does tend to let you get away with things,” Kyoka admitted. “Remember the other day when you were sitting on your desk? The guy didn’t even bat an eye.”

“He also seems like he talks to you more than he does the rest of us!” Toru pointed out.

“Plus he worries about you more than the rest of us!” Ochaco added on.

“He looks more relaxed around you.” Tsuyu threw in.

“Sometimes when we have class representative meetings, he’ll offhandedly mention you.” Momo reported thoughtfully. “He’ll tell me about something you said or did that he found funny or endearing. It’s actually pretty adorable the way he talks about you. It’s like his whole face lights up.”

You were quiet for a very long moment. It was too good to be true. You liked playing it safe. You kept your cards close to your chest until you were absolutely sure you had the wining hand. And if you’d learnt anything in your hero education, it was that sometimes you needed to take a risk.

“Can I have my phone, please?”

Mina tossed it to you. Without another word, you navigated to your messages, and typed something out quickly. Before you could reconsider, you took a risk.

You hit send.

. . . 

This isn’t actually all that bad.

When Kirishima and Kaminari had suggested a “boys’ night”, Tenya had been apprehensive at best. He was all for class bonding activities, but what was the point if it was only a fraction of their group?

“(L/N) and the girls are having a sleepover, so we may as well something ourselves.” Sero had pointed out.

Despite his skepticism, Tenya found himself thoroughly enjoying himself. After admitting he’d never seen a Marvel movie, Midoriya had immediately logged the common room TV into his Disney+ account and began the first ever 1-A Marvel movie marathon.

“Ugh, does this mean we have to watch Age of Ultron?” Ojiro groaned “That one sucks.”

“Yeah, but at some point I’m going to make Iida watch Wandavision.” Midoriya replied “Ultron is important to understanding it, sucky as it may be.”

“That’s not gonna be for a while if we’re watching every single Marvel movie, though.” Sato chuckled. 

“Yeah, we’re definitely gonna need more than one night for this shit,” Kaminari chortled “Wandavision not withstanding.”

Tenya smiled, not quite following but listening all the same. He suddenly felt his phone vibrate in his pocket.

(L/N): Random question. Want to go out and get dinner tomorrow, just the two of us?

It was indeed a random question. He had no qualms about spending time with (L/N) though. Even if it was just the two us them. Especially if it’s just the two of us. Tenya quickly shook the thought away though, feeling he’s cheeks flare.

Me: That would be great! Do  you have a time and place in mind?

(L/N): Would 6 be ok? As for the place… would you be up for a surprise?

Tenya hesitated. Usually he’s say no. He liked everything to be perfectly planed to a T. But something about (L/N) made him want to be spontaneous. They made him want to take risks. So he decided to do precisely that. He threw caution into the wind as he sent his response.

Me: 6 is more than ok, and I’m always up for a surprise if it’s with you.

Tenya cringed immediately after hitting send. The instant regret was crushing and depressing. He wished he could be honest about his feelings, about (L/N) without overthinking every move he made.

Oh well. What’s done is done. He slipped his phone back into his pocket, praying you wouldn’t respond. However, his plea went ignored a minute later when he felt his phone vibrate yet again.

Biting back a groan, Tenya opened his texts, inwardly bracing himself.

(L/N): Awesome! I’ll meet you at 6 in the common room tomorrow, then. Can’t wait! ❤️

He gaped. That tiny red emoji wormed not his brain and burned itself behind his eyes until that was all he could see. He barely even registered the rest of the message.

“Whatcha lookin’ at, Iida?” Kaminari, never one to understand personal space, leaned over to glance at the class rep’s phone phone before he could angle it away. “You sly little- IIDA HAS A DATE!”

���No I- that’s not- Kaminari!” Tenya sputtered incoherently, arms flailing. “That was entirely inappropriate. You shouldn’t look at other people’s devices without their permission. It’s rude, demeaning, and an invasion of privacy!”

“Forget that, what’s this about a date?” Sero leaned in on Kaminari’s other side.

“Iida and (L/N) were texting,” Kaminari announced “They asked him out to dinner, he said yes, and they send a heart emoji.”

“What color?” Aoyama demanded, squinting.

“Red.”

“Oh my,” Aoyama leaned back in his seat, a coy smirk playing across his lips.

Sero chuckled, leaning across Kaminari’s lap to pat Tenya on the arm. “You lucky bastard.”

The blue haired boy brushed his hand away, bristling. “Not that my personal activities are any of your concern, but it’s not a date. We’re just going to get something to eat.”

“I’m not an expert or anything, but I don’t think many people go out one-on-one for dinner if it’s platonic.” Midoriya pointed out. 

“Yeah, plus, that emoji says a lot.” Kirishima added “(L/N) clearly means this to be a date. If you don’t feel the same way about them, you need to tell them.”

“You don’t want to go on a date with (L/N)?” Todoroki asked, raising an eyebrow “I would’ve thought you’d be happy for an opportunity like that.”

“See! Even Todoroki can see you’ve got it bad for them!” Sato exclaimed, pointing an accusatory finger at the confused heterochromic boy.

Tenya ignored his overly-excited classmates. He flipped back through his conversation with (L/N), staring at every text until he’d inadvertently memorized them all.

Me: Is this a date?

. . .

“So much for subtly, I guess.” Kyoka remarked.

“Subtly gets you nowhere with Iida!” Ochaco insisted “You have to be upfront with him!”

“But I sent him a heart,” You groaned for the fourth time.

“Well, there’s no sense in bemoaning it now.” Momo reasoned.

“It was a calculated risk.” Toru admitted, an undercut of worry in her voice.

“A risk, huh?” You chuckled humorlessly “I seem to be taking a lot of those tonight.”

Ding!

Seven pairs of eyes darted to your overturned phone at the same moment. No one moved an inch.

“Well,” Tsu nudged you “are you going to look at it?”

You gulped, shakily taking the device. The girl’s gathered around you. As you opened your text messages.

Iida: Is this a date?

“No backing down now!” Ochaco squealed, gripping your shoulders tightly and shaking you.

“Go, go, go, go, go!” Mina bounced on her knees like it was a sporting event.

You took a deep breath, then texted back.

. . .

(L/N): That was the idea, lol. It doesn’t have to be if you don’t want it to be, tho

Tenya pursed his lips, showing the response to Midoriya.

“C’mon, Iida.” His friend chuckled lightly “Just tell them the truth.”

The truth. He did want it to be a date, but a simple “I want to go on a date with you” didn’t seem sufficient. It wouldn’t do justice to how he really felt.

Tenya had already taken a risk tonight, so what was one more? But knowing what he now knew about your feelings, it didn’t seem quite so scary anymore.

Me: I’d love nothing more than to go on a date with you, (L/N). Truth be told, I’ve wanted to for a while now, I just haven’t had the courage to ask you myself. I look forward to seeing you tomorrow. ❤️

[yelena-bellova]

Don't Be Afraid: Poe Dameron x Solo!Reader - Chapter Thirty One

Chapter Thirty One: Hide and Secrets

Plot: Reeling from the loss of Chewbacca, the group travels to Kijimi in hopes of retrieving a vital piece of information...

Series Masterlist

Warnings: graphic description of violence/injuries, violent intrusive thoughts, blood, language, choking, we're not here to have a good time people so lots of angst today,

Word Count: 7.2k

A/N: Even though the rest of the series is going to be brutal, this is the last episode where there's even a little bit of a breather. Related to that, we're so close to the end and I'm not sure how to process that 🥺 Hope you enjoy!!

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When I finally dried my tears and went about summoning the same strength I had when losing Dad and my uncle, I exited the refresher. Finn and Rey stood in the main hold, Rey jumped to her feet, rubbing her typically sweaty palms against her pants.

“Y/n,” she quickly said, “I know that it will never be enough, but I-“ “Rey,” I held up two hands as I stopped in front of my distraught friend, “It wasn’t your fault. You didn’t know you could do that, right?” She rapidly shook her head, “No, I had no idea.” “Then,” I sadly shrugged my shoulders, “I can’t be mad at you, you’d have never meant to hurt Chewie.” The tears in her eyes still welled regardless of my forgiveness. “I really am sorry,” she whispered, her throat catching with sorrow.

I pulled her into my arms and the two of us embraced, sharing in what little comfort could be taken in the moment. The unsettling feeling of secrecy was what caused me to pull back, my hands still rested on Rey’s shoulders as I scanned her face.

“There’s something you’re not telling me,” I stated, watching as her eyes became fearful before turning my gaze to Finn, “The same goes for you. What's going on?” Rey’s mouth opened and closed a couple times, whether a truth or a lie had been building on her lips was a loss to find out as Poe marched out of the cockpit. “We’ve only got eight hours left, so what are we gonna do?”

“This isn’t over,” I whispered to Rey, dropping my hands and turning to the group. “What can we do?” Finn said hopelessly, “We gotta get back to base.”

“We don’t have time to go back,” Poe argued, “We are not giving up. If we do that, Chewie died for nothing.” “Poe, Chewie had the dagger,” Finn replied.

I spoke up, “Yeah, but there has to be some other way.”

“Well, there isn’t,” Finn responded, “That was the only clue to the wayfinder thing and it’s gone.” I frustratedly rubbed my hands over my face and left them there, our problems were no easier to face in the self-inflicted darkness.

“So true,” 3PO said from the corner he stood in, “The inscription lives only in my memory now.”

I spread two of my fingers for my eyes to peek out, “Come again?" “The inscription of the dagger is stored in my memory banks,” he answered, “But the translation from a forbidden language cannot be retrieved. That is short of a complete redacted memory bypass.”

“A complete what?” Finn asked.

“It’s a terribly dangerous and sinful act performed on unwitting droids by dregs and criminals,” 3PO replied, turning away as if the whole idea was entirely out of the question.

Finn’s head whipped to Poe and I, “Let’s do that!” Determined as ever, Poe’s eyes sparked that familiar flame once again. “I know a black market droidsmith.” “Black market droidsmith?” 3PO echoed incredulously.

“But he’s on Kijimi,” Poe said, throwing his head back defeatedly. “What’s wrong with Kijimi?” I asked.

“I had a little bad luck on Kijimi,” Poe made every effort to not look any of us in the eye, “But if this mission fails, it’s all been for nothing. All we’ve done, all this time…” he finally looked up at me, nudging my arm with one of his gloved fingers, “3PO’s your and Leia’s droid, you’re the only one here that can give permission to do this.” I sighed and looked over at the droid I was so used to disappointing throughout my life. “We can’t quit now,” I said, “For Chewie.” Finn rose from his seat and nodded confidently before taking my hand, “For Chewie.”

Rey, who still looked every bit as guilty as she thought she should be, stood next and took Finn’s outstretched hand. “For Chewie.”

Poe looked down at my empty hand and back up at me, I held it out for him signaling that we weren’t currently at the odds we had been the last time we’d spoken. The warmth of his palm radiated through his leather glove and he ever so slightly squeezed, the only comfort he could provide me with in such a desperate hour. I’d take whatever I could get.

3PO shuffled over to us, taking Poe’s other hand in his in silent agreement with my decision. At the gesture, Poe visibly became uncomfortable, the list of people he was okay with being openly affectionate with began and ended with me. “Kijimi!” he announced, letting go off both our hands and heading back for the cockpit.

I wasn’t far behind, assuming the role of copilot as I sat down next to him. “You’ve never mentioned Kijimi, not even once,” I said, awaiting his answer that wasn’t going to come, “What are you hiding from me, Dameron?”

My question was enough to drag his eyes away from the controls to meet mine, a look I couldn’t decipher in them. He wasn’t fearful, he wasn’t angry, but he certainly didn’t appreciate me bringing up whatever misfortune he’d run into on Kijimi. “Thrusters a go?” he asked, ignoring my curiosity.

As I mumbled my confirmation, I settled into my chair at great unease knowing that I wasn’t the only one keeping secrets from my friends. We all were.

——

Kijimi was cold and unforgiving, much like the stormtroopers that roamed the planet’s streets.

The First Order was banging on every door and questioning every life form they could. All of us, save Poe, were hidden on one side of a building, waiting for my boyfriend to return from scouting out the territory for a safe path to wherever it was we were going. His jacketed figure finally made its way back to our group, I could see his frown even with the terrible lighting. “They’re everywhere,” he reported, “All right, I know what we should do.” “So do I,” 3PO interrupted, “We should leave.”

I placed a hand over where the droid’s mouth would be if he were human, “Now is not the time.” “Follow me,” Poe ordered, leading us down the street towards our unknown destination. Though only unknown to us, Poe navigated the way with as much ease as he did the jungle of Ajan Kloss. He’d clearly spent a lot of his time on Kijimi. “All right,” he stopped our group against another wall, “Let’s head down this way.”

A cocked blaster pressed against his head stopped any further movement.

“Heard you were spotted at Monk’s Gate,” a modulated female voice said, “Thought, ‘He’s not stupid enough to come back here.’” “Oh, you’d be surprised,” Poe replied, his voice somehow audibly displaying both nervousness and cockiness.

The blaster I kept on my hip was off its holster and in my hand with speed that even surprised me. “I don’t know who the hell you are, but it’s in your best interest to lower the gun,” I said, my voice steely as I aimed my weapon at the gold helmet the woman wore.

“What’s going on?” Finn asked, one step behind me and ready to fight if necessary for Poe’s life. “Guys, this is Zorii,” Poe awkwardly made introductions, the barrel of the blaster still against his temple, “Zorii, this is Rey and Finn and,” he blindly gestured to me, “That’s Y/n.”

“I could pull this trigger right now,” Zorii threatened. “I’ve seen you do worse,” Poe replied quickly. “For a lot less…” “Can we just…” in a bold move, Poe turned and removed his hood, sporting the smallest smirk as he cautiously eyed the woman, “Talk about this?” “I wanna see your brains in the snow…” Zorii answered, not taking kindly to his diplomacy.

“You make one move and I’ll give everybody a display of just that,” I growled, ignoring both the Jedi way and my wondering just how well Poe knew this woman, there was an ease between their back and forth that stirred an almost jealous feeling in me…

“So you’re still mad?” Poe asked, “Zorii, we could use your help. We gotta crack this droid’s head open and fast.” An indignant 3PO spoke up, “Pardon me!” Poe ignored him, “We’re trying to find Babu Frik.” “Babu? Babu only works for the crew,” Zorii answered, seemingly unthreatened by my steady hand and pointed blaster, “That’s not you anymore.”

“What crew?” Rey asked.

My eyes flicked to Poe, watching him shake his head rapidly before silently admitting defeat to the truth Zorii couldn’t be stopped from sharing. “Funny, he never mentioned it…your friend’s old job was running spice.”

“You were a spice runner?” Finn asked, almost as surprised as I was.

Poe was quick to deflect the unflattering light that was being shed on him, “You were a stormtrooper?” “Were you a spice runner?” Rey echoed the question.

“Were you a scavenger? We could do this all night.” “You don’t have all night,” Zorii said as she began to stalk around us, her blaster still trained on Poe, “You know I’m still digging out of the hole you put me in when you left to join the Resistance,” her head tilted in Rey’s direction before looking back at me, “You two. You’re the ones they’re looking for. Bounty for them might just cover us.” I didn’t have to look over my shoulder to know that the two bodies that had followed Zorii were slowly making their way towards us, I met Rey’s eyes quickly and gave an almost imperceptible nod.

“Djak’kankah!” Zorii shouted. “Don’t djak’kankah,” Poe hurried from beside me.

In synch, Rey pulled her staff out from behind her back and I tossed my blaster to Finn to unsheathe my lightsaber. Rey knocked Zorii to the ground while I made work of fatally damaging Zorii’s comrade’s weapons. Within seconds, they’d all been taken care of and I turned to see Rey had her saber pointed at Zorii’s body with the latter aiming their gun at my fellow padawan.

“We could really use your help,” Rey said, nicer than I could have ever been in such a situation, “Please.” “Not that you care,” Zorii said, her chest heaving from the fight as she looked between the both of us, “But I think you’re alright.” “I care,” Rey replied, deactivating her blade and extending a hand to Zorii.

“Quit threatening him” I said, nodding towards a slightly stunned Poe, “And we won’t have a problem.” Zorii, in fact, proved to be anything but a problem. She led us down a back way to a trader’s den, confidently marching in as if she owned the place. For all I knew, maybe she did. I didn’t know the woman or how she knew my boyfriend, whom it seemed I also didn’t know. Poe had kept an entire chunk of his life hidden from me all the years that I’d known him and something about that hurt. However, with 3PO hooked up to a multitude of wires, I was trying my best to focus on the matters at hand. “I haven’t the faintest idea why I agree to this,” the droid said from his seated position, “I must be malfunctioning,” Babu Frik, the little alien that Poe had known once upon a time worked on one of 3PO’s wires, causing him to repeat himself, “I must be malfunctioning.”

“You agreed to this because it’s our only option,” I said from my spot next to him, “You do this and you’re a hero to the galaxy.” “Babu Frik?” Rey asked the small droid mechanic, “Can you help us with this?’ He gave an answer in a language none of us could understand, causing Rey to look elsewhere for a translation. “Zorii? Is this gonna work?” Zorii moved from her position on the steps with Poe, the two of them having warmed up to each other a little too fast for my liking. She posed a question in Babu Frik’s tongue, the creature answering back in his naturally slow manner. “He says he’s found something in your droid’s forbidden memory bank. Words translated from Sith.” “That’s it!” I exclaimed, patting 3PO’s metal shoulder. “Yeah, that’s what we need,” Finn echoed my excitement from behind Rey and I.

“Who are you hanging out with that speaks Sith?” Zorii questioned Poe, who was making his way down to stairs to come into the same space. “Babu, can you make him translate it?” he asked.

Babu answered.

“Yes,” Zorii translated, “But it will cause a complete-“ “A complete memory wipe,” 3PO finished.

My eyes widened, “A what?”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Poe held up a hand, “We make him translate it, he won’t remember…anything?”

“Droid memory go blank,” Babu answered, speaking enough of our language to confirm Poe’s question, “Blank, blank.” “There must be another way!” 3PO exclaimed, I was still too in shock to form words. “Doesn’t R2 back up your memory?” Finn asked.

“Oh, please, R2’s storage units are famously unreliable.”

“No,” I finally found my voice and announced it to the room, “I’m calling it. We’re not doing this, I’m sorry, but we’re gonna have to find another way.” “Y/n…” Poe started, carefully tiptoeing around the impending explosion of emotions I was about to have. “Nope, not happening,” I continued, “I’m not losing anyone else. Babu, thank you for your time, start putting him back together.” Rey gently grasped my arm, “Y/n…” 3PO, for all his shortcomings, was one of the steadiest presences in my life. He hadn’t been just a faithful servant to me and my family, he’d been my most dependable friend. There had been too many losses in the Resistance in the past year and fresh off of Chewie’s death, I wasn’t prepared to let another piece of my family go.

And if the very fate of the galaxy didn’t depend on getting the damned inscription, I’d have allowed myself to be selfish.

Slowly turning away from Rey, I came to stand in front of where 3PO sat hooked up to Babu’s machines. “Do we have a choice in this?” I asked softly, my mouth suddenly feeling unreasonably dry.

The droid processed for a moment before rising from his seat and taking a few steps away from us. “If this mission fails, it was all for nothing. All we’ve done, all this time…” 3PO turned and faced our group, staring silently at us all.

“What are you doing there, 3PO?” Poe asked.

“Taking one last look, sir,” he answered, “At my friends.”

I shut my eyes, my wet lashes dropping a tear or two down my cheeks as the sentiment hit me. “Go ahead,” I whispered, giving Babu the authority to do what needed to be done.

Noise from outside broke the moment. “Night raids are gonna start soon,” Zorii stated, “I’ll keep lookout.”

“I’m coming with you,” Poe said, chasing after her departing figure in a surprising turn of events. I dragged my tearful eyes away from my soon to be amnesic droid to my boyfriend who wasn’t sparing any glances my way.

“You still don’t trust me?” Zorii asked.

“Did you ever trust me?” my boyfriend fired back as they climbed the staircase together.

“Nope.” My eyes remained trained on the last spot where Poe had been visible to me before he disappeared with the mystery woman. It didn’t matter, the hurt and anger I felt with Poe for leaving me as I readied myself to say goodbye to 3PO wouldn’t change with knowing their history together. But damn it all if I didn’t want to slap Poe a little for not choosing to stay with me rather than go with Zorii. I could feel Rey and Finn’s concerned eyes through the back of my head, I didn’t have to turn around to showcase my jealousy.

“It’s fine,” I lied, clenching my fists at my sides, “He can do whatever the hell he wants, we’ve got bigger concerns.” I walked back over to where 3PO was once again seated, Babu already preparing him for the procedure. “Thanks for…” I wrapped two arms around the gold droid’s neck, “Everything.”

One metal arm patted my back awkwardly, hugs weren’t exactly something we typically exchanged. “You are most welcome, Mistress Y/n. Your companionship had brought me a great many joys throughout our years together.” There was nothing more to be said, or rather there was so much more and not enough time to say it. I backed away to let Babu do his work and stepped to the side, occupying the space next to Finn and keeping a watchful eye as the creature began to operate on my droid. Bee and D-O, the abandoned droid Bee had discovered and activated on the ship, watched from the opposite side of the room as well. Minutes went by without a word, the only sound in the room was Babu’s tools picking and prodding at the inside of 3PO’s head.

“Oh, I just had an idea,” 3PO eventually said, “There’s something else we could try-“ We’d never know what he’d been thinking as Babu hit the correct circuit and 3PO lost power. Finn reached a hand around my back to land on my shoulder as I flinched, the sight of him switched off not by his own accord a little hard on me. Rey took the time to excuse herself and push past us, going to check on Bee and D-O.

“You don’t have to watch, y’know…” Finn said, “If it’s too much…” “No,” I shook my head, my eyes still on the droid whose loyalty I could only hope to match, “I’m staying with him.” There was a pregnant pause between the two of us before Finn took a breath, “Can I ask you a question?” “I’ll answer yours if you answer mine…” I replied.

“What’s going on with you and Poe?” I sighed and crossed my arms, taking a defensive position as if I could shield myself from the reality of the topic. “Nothing good…” I answered, “Things have been rough lately.” Taking his time to handle the weight of my answer, he couldn’t stop himself from asking a followup. “You guys are gonna be okay though, right?”

Emotions had run high all day, the moment we were in was no exception. I’d liked to have blamed the tears that stung my eyes on saying goodbye to 3PO, but I couldn’t lie to myself. Poe and I were drifting apart and that struck a deeper fear in me than I’d ever known.

I cleared my throat, the thought of admitting my feelings out loud wasn’t one I was ready to handle. “Sorry, no follow ups. My turn…What’s your secret?” I’d hit the target just as I’d intended to, though I still wasn’t sure what I was searching for. Whatever it was, I could sense that Finn was desperate to tell somebody. “I can’t…I can’t tell you here,” he finally relented from secrecy in its entirety, “Later.”

Nodding in response, I watched him leave to go find where Rey and the droids had wandered off to. I stayed silent as I watched Babu try to access whatever apart of 3PO’s circuits the inscription lay in. I decided that once we returned to our ship, I’d try to get word to Mom and give her an update. She was undoubtably worried by now and she didn’t need to wonder any longer than necessary.

The hatch at the top of the staircase opened to reveal Zorii and Poe. “There’s an incoming destroyer,” Zorii announced.

“We gotta go now, did we get it?” Poe asked.

“Wouldn’t have to ask if you’d have stayed,” I mumbled to myself, just loud enough that he could possibly hear it. “Babu?” “Yep, droid is ready!” Babu answered back, making one final adjustment to 3PO to make the droid’s eyes turn red and his torso to sit straight up. I jumped back at the unsettling sight.

“The Emperor’s wayfinder is in the Imperial vault,” a voice that definitely didn’t belong to the beloved droid informed us, “At delta 3-6, transient 9-3-6, variant 3-2 on a moon in the Endor system. From the southern shore. Only this blade tells. Only this blade tells.” With an exclaim, Babu shut 3PO off again and he fell back in his chair.

“The Endor system,” Finn said, “Where the last war ended?”

An overhead rumbling that shook the ceiling of the workshop caused us all to look up, Rey was only slightly ahead of me as we made our way up the stairs fearlessly to open the hatch. The average being wouldn’t have been able to tell the ominous Star Destroyer having in the sky apart from any other, but Rey and I weren’t average. “It’s him…” I muttered.

“Ren’s Destroyer.” “He’s here?” Poe asked from below. I was suddenly struck with an overwhelming sensation, different than the empathetic pain I felt when one was injured or the unfortunate attacks I’d been suffering from lately. This was warmth and familiarity and…family.

“Rey,” I stuck a hand out and blindly reached for her, “It’s Chewie.” Sensing the same thing I was, she repeated his name hopefully.

“What about him?” Finn asked. “He’s on the ship” I answered, my voice cracking with emotion, “He’s alive.” “What? How?” Poe asked in disbelief.

“He’s alive!” Rey exclaimed, “He must’ve been on a different transport.” “We gotta go get him,” Finn stated, as if it wasn’t what we were all thinking.

I bounded down the steps with a newfound joy, something I’d thought was impossible to find in our situation. “No time to waste, let’s pack it up!” I said, moving around Zorii towards 3PO. As soon as I landed at the droid’s side, he sat up. “Might I introduce myself,” he said, “I am C-3PO, human cyborg relations,” he looked around the room at the various faces, “And you are?” “Okay, that’s gonna be a problem,” Poe commented, pointing at the droid.

“Okay,” I rubbed my eyes out of stress before placing to hands on 3PO’s arm, “I promise I will explain everything to you but right now, we don’t have the time so I’m gonna need you to trust us. Now,” I bent down and grabbed his discarded coat, “Put this on and follow us.” “Trust you? When I don’t even know who you are? I don’t see-“ “I’m your master, okay?” I hurriedly pulled the protocol droid to his feet and started shoving his arms into the jacket, “And if you want to live, you’ll listen to me when I say we need to get the hell out of here.”

Begrudgingly, the droid followed along as our group hurried out of Babu Frik’s workshop and into the snowy streets of Kijimi. I could sense Ren’s incoming presence, causing me to urge us all to move faster.

“3PO, move your metal ass!” Poe said frustratedly as we closed in on where our ship was parked, “We’re almost there.” “How dare you,” he exclaimed, “We’ve only just met!” Rey, Finn, the droids and I rushed between two buildings before I noticed that Poe and Zorii had hung behind. I stopped and watched the two share an exchange I couldn’t make out, Zorii shoved something into Poe’s hand just before I heard the sound of a ship overhead. Ren.

“We need to go!” I shouted annoyedly, when Poe made no effort to end their conversation, I rolled my eyes and shoved Rey and Finn forward, “Go, he’ll catch up.” We made our way to the ship and loaded in, I seated myself in the pilot’s chair, taking it upon myself to get us where we needed to be. Poe eventually made his way to the cockpit just as I was making the final checks.

“Nice of you to finally join us, Dameron,” I retorted as I lifted us off the ground, “I’m sure making chit chat with old flames was more important than getting our asses off this snowy wasteland.”

Poe tossed a coin shaped token into my lap without a word, I picked it up and upon inspection identified it as a First Order captain’s medallion. It was a surefire way to get us aboard the Destoryer when there’d previously been no plan. Connecting the dots that it was Zorii who had given it to him, I decided it was in everybody’s best interest if I stopped talking.

Once we made it up to the meaning ship, a First Order officer came over the comms and asked for our identification. I slipped the medallion into the slot with Poe, Finn and Rey anxiously positioned around me. We all held our breath as we awaited confirmation that we’d been granted passage. I exhaled forcefully when the message came through, “We’re clear, hanger 12.” Together, and yet entirely separate, Poe and I navigated the ship into the designated landing zone without any problems. I jumped out of my seat and threw my snow jacket off. Ren was still on Kijimi, clearly unable to sense that we were no longer there, which would buy us time. Not much, but hopefully enough to retrieve Chewie and chart a course to Endor safely.

The four of us bounded down the ramp of the ship and fired our blasters at the stormtroopers demanding our credentials plus a few that waited from a distance. “You three, stay there!” Rey ordered the droids.

“Happily!” 3PO called back. “Which way?” Poe asked Finn, the only one of us who had a decent shot at navigating the foreign ship.

“No idea,” he disappointedly answered, “Follow me!” We obeyed his command and let him lead on, we maneuvered down a great many hallways as stealthily as we could. Eventually once we heard the marching footsteps of a group of troopers, we ducked between panels that stuck out of the wall and hid till they passed. We darted out and made our way down another hall, taking cues from Finn, until we turned around to come face to face with two stormtroopers.

“Drop your weapons!” one of them ordered. While Finn and Poe immediately held out their hands for the troopers to see, Rey took a brave step forward. “It’s okay that we’re here,” she said smoothly, waving a hand in a semi circle.

A beat of silence passed before the stormtroopers lowered their weapons obediently, “It’s okay that you’re here.” “It’s good…”

“You’re relieved that we’re here,” I added, waving my hand in a matching manner.

“Thank goodness you’re here.” “Welcome, guys.” “We’re looking for a prisoner and his belongings,” Rey continued, the supposed guards giving up the information all too willingly. We wasted no time in leaving them behind and making for where they’d said Chewie’s was. Upon finding out the specific type of cell he was being held in was meant for torture, I strode with a new urgency.

“They said Chewie’s this w-“ I started, before losing all words and clutching the wall as the familiar splitting pain entered my head.

The flames had grown closer.

The screams echoed louder.

A well known animalistic cry filled my ears.

With a blood red lightsaber in my hand extended, I turned to see Chewbacca’s body laid out on the ground, his chest rising and falling deathly slow, lightsaber wounds marking his hairy body.

“Don’t be afraid,” the deep voice of Ren came from behind me, “You know exactly what you’re capable of.” I bit down on my lip so hard that I could taste blood in an attempt to stifle the scream that was trying its hardest to escape my mouth. The pain couldn’t die fast enough once the attack ceased, Ren’s voice still echoing in my mind like it was a cavern. “Y/n,” Poe was quick to steady me as my legs went out from underneath me, “Are you okay? What the hell was that?” Another secret was what it was. I’d managed to keep my hellish conscious nightmares hidden from him over the last few months. “I’m f-fine,” I panted, shrugging off his helpful hands as I rose to my feet shakily, “Finn,” I waved my blaster towards the control panel, “The doors.” He listened to me and went to work on unlocking them, I ignored Poe’s sudden concern for me and focused on Rey, who had separated herself from us. “What is it?” I asked in between heaving breaths, my heart rate sky high as the images of my dead friend still danced in my head.

“The dagger is on this ship,” she said, “We need it.” “Why?” Poe asked as he approached her, I stayed leaned up against the wall. “A feeling,” Rey answered, “I’ll meet you back at the hanger.” “I’m coming with you,” I stated, pushing off the wall in a sad attempt to follow after her.

“Y/n, you can barely walk, you need to get back to the ship,” Poe said, catching my forearm in his hand in hopes I wouldn’t slip out of his grasp. “You’re not in charge of me, Poe,” I bit back at him a little harsher than called for as I pulled my arm out of his grip and started off in Rey’s direction, “You two go and get Chewie.” Poe frustratedly sighed, “Look, I’m just trying to help you.” “Yeah, well,” I turned and locked eyes with him, “Don’t.” Without waiting see his reaction and before I had the sense to apologize for my hurtful words, I turned away and stumbled after Rey. Eventually I caught up to her and the two of us jogged through the Destroyer. I trusted that she knew where she was going, unlike my distrust of the nightmare’s physical effects on me. It had never happened before and the worry I felt was more than justified.

Almost as soon as I regained the ability to run and feel like my legs weren’t going to fail me, the air I breathed was sucked out of my lungs and I let out a stifled cry. Someone nearby had gotten injured. “Was it one of them?” Rey asked, concern overwhelming her tone. “It must’ve been,” I replied, bracing my hands against my knees and inhaling deeply, “But they’re okay. C’mon, we gotta go.” “They’re getting worse,” she said, broaching the topic I wanted so desperately to avoid, “Your attacks.”

“We’re not talking about this right now,” I snapped, my patience slipping away quicker than I could control, “I’m fine, now let’s go.”

We made the rest of the journey in silence, if my head wasn’t in such a fog I would have felt sorry for how I’d reacted to the care Rey and Poe had tried to show me. My logic felt buried beneath my fear, my guilt over a crime I hadn’t actually committed clouding my mind. It had been so vivid, Chewie laid out on the ground with a lightsaber hole burning through his sternum. My reasoning for leaving Finn and Poe to rescue the Wookiee had been twofold, not only would Rey need my help if she’d sensed something, but I didn’t want to go near Chewie at the moment.

Rey and I stepped through a door to a pure white room, a stark contrast to the dark color scheme of the rest of the ship. Descending the steps, I scanned the room for Chewie’s belongings but found something I’d never expected to lay eyes on. Rey saw it too, both of us taking slow and curious steps towards it.

The charred remnants of Darth Vader’s helmet.

I could feel the darkness, the pain associated with the armor and was lost as to how it could possibly have survived. How could it have ended up here? Anakin’s body, as my mother had told me once, had been burned on Endor at the end of the war by Luke. It was impossible, but our lives were made up of impossible so perhaps it wasn’t so imperceivable.

Turning away from the helmet, Rey and I spotted Chewie’s bandoleer, his bowcaster and the dagger. Rey grabbed the dagger while I took the other items and slung them over my shoulder, my friend stared down at the dagger and it didn’t take Jedi skills to sense her confusion, her fear. “What is it?” I asked quietly, not wanting to startle her out of whatever daze she was in. Regardless of my efforts, she jumped with a gasp and whipped around to face the empty expanse of the room. “Rey?”

Her brown eyes were locked onto something that wasn’t there, at least not to me. “You’re hard to get rid of…” she said, her voice low.

“Excuse me?” I furrowed my brow, confused as she turned back to the task at hand of gathering Chewie’s objects, “What-“

She stayed silent except for the sound of her lightsaber activating, she faced the room once again with anger painted across her features. “You’re lying…” she seethed.

It didn’t take me long to figure out what was transpiring before me, it was the force bond Rey had told me so much about. We had researched it, pouring over the Jedi texts for any possible answer as to why her and Ren were seemingly tied to one another. We’d been unsuccessful so far and Rey had been forced to experience unexpected connections with him. It was surreal to watch it take place, some conversation taking place in a realm I couldn’t enter with the person I’d been trying to reach for months.

“I don’t want this,” Rey said through her tears before letting out a cry and wielding the saber in a battle with the air. She froze as if her weapon had hit something, possibly Ren’s blade. I wanted nothing more than to jump into the fight and aid her as she broke away from her opponent. “Stop talking,” she demanded before continuing the fight. My hands were metaphorically tied behind my back and all I could do was stand there and wait for the moment to end.

My gut twisted as I got the distinct feeling that something was wrong on the other side of the ship, Finn and Poe were in danger. I couldn’t be in both places at once helping everybody and that killed me. If Rey and Ren’s connection didn’t break soon, I’d have to make the call to run like hell through the ship and find the others.

“Rey, we need to go,” I called, loud enough to hopefully break through her concentration.

“No!” she yelled, once again not directed at me. She expertly swung her lightsaber around, accidentally driving it into the pedestal and shattering the stand that displayed Vader’s helmet. Unfortunately, the fight still didn’t come to its end and Rey and the metaphysical Ren continued their assault on one another until eventually, Rey stumbled backwards signaling that the connection had been broken.

I came to her side, “What did he say?”

“He’s coming,” Rey answered, not quite present as she absorbed whatever he had told her.

“Shit,” I breathed, it wouldn’t take him long to get from Kijimi to the ship, “We need to go.”

Carrying Chewie’s things, we retraced our steps back to the ship as fast as we could. Suddenly faced with the reality of being in Ren’s presence, I wasn’t sure how I felt. All I knew for certain was we needed to find Poe and Finn immediately and leave before I discovered my true feelings. We made it back to the hanger and found the droids surrounded by troopers interrogating them. I aimed Chewie’s bowcaster at them and took out two while Rey disposed of the rest with her own blaster.

“Oh dear, my first laser battle,” 3PO commented, astonished. Had we not been in such a rush, I made have spared a second to laugh.

“Where are the others?” Rey urgently asked.

“They haven’t come back,” he answered.

“You two stay here,” I pointed towards the spacecraft as I began to step away from them, “I’m gonna go find them.” It was wasted effort, the familiar sound of Ren’s TIE Interceptor came roaring into the hanger. I froze in my spot the short distance away from Rey and the droids, knowing that where I needed to be had been decided for me.

“Find them,” Rey said to 3PO.

He scurried over to me and I placed the bowcaster and Chewie’s bandoleer in the his care, sending him on his way to retrieve Finn and Poe with D-O and Bee at his feet. I turned my attention to the figure emerging from the Interceptor, Rey stood directly across from him while I split the difference between them. My better judgement told me not to extend my lightsaber, that it wasn’t going to be that kind of fight. I needed to wait for the right moment. Even as the battalion of stormtroopers descended into the hanger, I kept my weapon holstered. I was apprehended by two of them, the long-standing fight for my capture finally over. As they pulled me back and handcuffed my wrists, I held eye contact with Ren, or at least where his eyes lay underneath his helmet. This was the closest we’d been the one another since our fight on Crait. The sick familiarity of him was anything but comforting, and yet there was a part of me that needed to hear him speak. He’d gone dark on me for too long and I needed to know what was going on in his head.

He shifted his focus to Rey, the two of them circling one another in some sort of silent showdown. Finally, they stopped, Rey closest to the edge of the hanger where with one miscalculated step, she could meet an unfortunate end. “Why did the Emperor come for me?” she asked, succeeding in confusing me, “Why did he want to kill a child? Tell me.” “Because he saw what you would become,” Ren answered, “You don’t just have power. You have his power. You’re his granddaughter. You are a Palpatine.”

It seemed like to world stopped for a minute, everything we were fighting for and against was swept away with the wind like stray grains of sand on Tatooine. Shock wasn’t a strong enough word to describe what I was feeling, my chest constricting and my mind spinning. It couldn’t be true.

“My mother was the daughter of Vader,” Ren began.

I couldn’t stand to listen to him soil the legacy of the woman I loved most in the galaxy, “You don’t breathe a word about-“ My rage was slayed as soon as it had been born as a nearby Stormtrooper drove the butt of his blaster into my abdomen, causing me to cough and choke as oxygen was forcefully knocked from my body. I groaned at the spreading pain, clenching my eyes shut while trying to still listen to the conversation happening in front of me.

“Your father was the son of the Emperor,” Ren continued his speech, “What Palpatine doesn’t know is we’re a dyad in the Force, Rey. Two that are one. We’ll kill him together and take the throne.”

“Rey,” I breathed, fighting through the throbbing pain in my abdomen, “He’s lying, don’t listen to him.” Ren blindly reached an open hand behind him and closed off my airways, choking me from afar and effectively shutting me up. “You know what you need to do,” he said, turning back to Rey and ignoring the sounds of struggle I was making to construct any sort of breath I could.

Words couldn’t be formed but I mentally urged Rey, begged her not to listen to the utter shit Ren was feeding her. As my vision began to grow grainy, I heard the faint sounds of the Falcon, my beloved ship, and was convinced that death was calling me. But as I opened my bloodshot eyes and witnessed her make a grand arrival, I felt new life surge through me. The pilot, undoubtably Poe, backed up to the edge of the hanger and hit the thrusters, sending a wave of energy into the room that caused each Stormtrooper to slide across the floor. Ren dropped his hold on me and I took my first wheezy breath just as the two troopers holding me in position lost their grip on my body. I moved against the currents until I was parallel with Rey, Finn was standing on the Falcon’s ramp ready to rescue us. Rey was the first to jump, sending Ren one last look that I couldn’t understand before she leapt into the air and Finn pulled her in.

I turned to the Supreme Leader, my hands cuffed in front of me, and my will as strong as ever. He’d invaded my mind countless times since he’d reestablished our connection through the Force, for once we were going do things on my terms. “I want you to look in my head and tell me what you see,” I shouted over the noise of the ship, he was a little too eager to accept the invitation. Once he was in, I filled my brain with every image I had of my grandfather, stating with each and every thought that I was a Kenobi. I was now an even bigger threat to him and his regime. When I reopened my eyes, I took satisfaction in the surprise painted across his pale face. For once, Kylo Ren was speechless. I gave a breathless smirk before turning around and jumping off the edge of the platform, Rey assisted in pulling me in by way of the Force while Finn caught me. The three of us ran up the ramp and into the heart of the ship.

“Rey, don’t-“ I began, trying to preemptively pull my friend out of the blame she was inevitably going to place on herself because of her recently discovered lineage. It was of no use, she stormed off away from Finn and I as quick as she could to process the news privately. Finn was confused and I didn’t have the time or the right to explain the situation to him. “Bee, help get me out of these,” I called, the little droid speedily rolling down the hall at my command and following me to the cockpit. When I arrived, I found Poe and Chewie sending us to lightspeed. I should have wanted to throw my arms around the Wookiee, had I been able to, but after my nightmarish attack wherein I had been responsible for his gruesome death, I felt the need to keep my distance. I should have wanted to run to Poe, to take comfort in his embrace as I recounted what had happened while we were separated. All I felt when I looked at him currently was frustration.

“Are you okay?” I asked, even my anger couldn’t override my concern for his wellbeing.

“Fine,” he replied coldly, not bothering to look my way as he finished up with the controls of the Falcon, “You?” He was lying. I could see crimson red on his arm staining his cream colored shirt. He was the one I’d sensed got hurt. I wanted to help him in any way I could but I suspected he was being refusing my help in retaliation for me refusing his. I swallowed, ignored the pain from my already bruising abdomen and sat down to let Bee work on removing my cuffs, “Fine.” Oh, how badly I wanted to tell him that things were so very far from fine.

----

A/N: If you thought this was bad, just wait for the next chapter...(sorry not sorry 🙈) Let men now if you'd like to be tagged and as always, thanks for reading!!

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[anika-ann]

Attached: The One Word

The Three Times Steve Didn’t Get to Hear the One Word He Wanted and the One Time He Did

Type: series, modern-college-professor Steve AU… aka the wrong attachment AU ;)

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader   Word count: 7700 👀

Summary: In which Steve really, really wants to ask you the question, but the odds are always against him – absurdly so. Maybe it’s fate and he shouldn’t ask. Or maybe the universe just hates him and punishes him for tainting a girl like you and wanting you all for himself officially.

Warnings: lots of swearing, crack-ish, briefest smut so 18+ only please, sickness and fluff

A/N: I say this to you, my friends – I do not at all envy men in a heterosexual relationship for being expected to pop the question. I would chicken out every time, I’m sure of it. Enjoy!

Story masterlist

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Steve liked to think important things through. He liked planning. He liked to have all the facts and view things from different angles before making a decision.

Therefore, wanting to marry you was something he was perfectly certain of and two months after he received your mother’s blessings – two months of slowly reducing costs, preparing to lower incomes, not that they had ever been glorious ever –, Steve had a feeling that the time was finally right and that he was ready to pop the question. He was.

The only problem was that the universe started plotting against him.

Big time.

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1.

Palmeri was a relatively new restaurant, but quickly gaining reputation. Steve had heard Carol talking about taking her girlfriend there for the fun of trying a new spot and getting a taste of fancy Italian. Clearly that had a good time; the moment he learned, he started considering it. Two days later, he had to make a reservation for a week later, because the word of the delicious food travelled fast.

That was fine with him, even if he felt like he was about to jump out of his skin before the date finally arrived. Still, he advertised the fact to you that he would like to celebrate your early wrapped up exams already foreshadowing that you would obviously slayed the one you were supposed to have a day prior Friday.

When you heard the name of the restaurant, your eyes twinkled like fairy lights, a squeal of delight escaping your lips before they swiftly found his to kiss him crazy. Steve’s heart thundered in his chest as you ran off back to your books with newly-found motivation, his nerves mingling with the satisfaction that you appreciated his idea – even if you couldn’t have no clue about what he was about to do.

He could only hope that you’d be as delighted at him sinking to one knee.

But he would have to get out of this fucking interfaculty meeting FIRST!

“Seeing as the satisfaction of the students apparently took a nose dive according to the university poll last month…” Fury continued rambling, his serious and mildly snarky voice carrying through the conference room, as if mocking Steve who anxiously eyed the clock, again.

The reservation was for seven thirty.

It was five to seven.

Half an hour ago, Steve hated the idea of not taking a shower and looking his absolute best while proposing to you.

Now? Every option looked better than this. He would arrive to the restaurant all sweaty and catching his breath if he took off right this moment. And even that seemed impossible; president Fury, that son of a bitch, was nowhere close to ending the meeting.

51 weeks. 51 Fridays Fury could have called the meeting.

Nope, that bastard picked this one, the one Friday Steve was planning on sweeping you off your feet and asking you to be his for the rest of your lives.

Fucking asshole.

“Got anything to add, Professor Rogers?” a gruff voice asked him and Steve jumped in his chair and nearly dropped the phone he was pulling out of his pocket to text you with his deepest regrets – but he had to, otherwise you’d already be on your way.

Best if he saved you the embarrassment; best if you stayed home at least, all dolled up and pretty and smiling for him to show off.

Goddammit fuck.

Steve’s eyes snapped to Fury, meeting a glare that seemed even sterner with only one functioning eye.

Steve gritted his teeth and determinedly gripping his phone.

“No,” he shot back, biting his cheek when Fury’s eyebrow rose at his snappy tone. “I mean… I need to make a phone call. If you’d excuse me, it will be just a minute.”

Likely story. He would have to be apologizing for at least three minutes straight and then crawl on his knees when he finally got back home; not because you’d be so unforgiving and angry, but because it would be the right thing to do after disappointing your precious heart.

He was about to make you sad. He fucking hated making you sad.

“Make it three tops,” the president grumbled, but luckily didn’t pry what was so important for him to leave the room.

“Stevie!” your bright voice greeted him from the speaker and Steve’s heart seized in his chest, his fist automatically clenching in anger. He was about to crush you because of a dumb-ass useless meeting. He brought the fist to his mouth to stop himself from greeting you equally delighted way and fleeting the university grounds. “I’m just about to take off! I was getting worried you wouldn’t make it. Did Fury give you a hard time? … Steve?”

Steve, much to his horror, found his eyes prickling with tears of frustration as his name on your lips sounded suddenly unsure.

Fuck. This.

“Hey babygirl,” he said finally and the roughness of his voice must have been everything you needed to hear to understand.

“You can’t make it.”

Steve wanted to tear his hair out at the defeat in your voice. Talk about a nose dive of your mood.  He was gonna fucking scream.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered instead, the apology so pathetic in comparison to what he wanted to say.

But that was the irony – you couldn’t even begin to guess how much it sucked for the two of you to not being able to go to the damn Palmeri. You didn’t know the main tragedy, only a part of it. You didn’t know he had been about to propose.

Silence stretched between the two of you and Steve tilted his head back, blinking against the sting in his eyes, his stomach sinking to his feet.

“It’s not your fault,” you sighed eventually, sounding as if you were trying to convince him as much as yourself.

Steve could imagine precisely the disappointment on your face, the fall of your expression, pretty features no doubt having been accented by make-up just the right amount twisting. He could see clearly how your lips made for smiles turned downward, lower lip maybe even trembling a bit.

Steve was gonna murder Fury.

“But it is. I’m so sorry, I know how excited you were and so was I and— I’m just really sorry.”

“I know, Steve,” you breathed out weakly and he could hear the attempt of a smile in your next words. “Come home soon, yeah? I’ll wait for you.”

Steve’s heart grew in size so rapidly it actually hurt.

“I love you, sweetheart. I know--- I know you might not wanna hear it now and that it doesn’t mean much, but I really do,” he creaked.

“It does. Bye, Steve.”

Steve’s fingers clutched at the phone, eyes falling shut in defeat.

You were nice about it, sure, but the fact that you didn’t say I love you back didn’t escape him as didn’t the switch from Stevie to Steve; the subtle hints sat heavily in his gut as he returned to the room.

He met Bucky’s compassionate gaze – of course Buck knew about why Steve was distracted during the assembly – and quickly looked away, once again excusing himself for the interruption even if there was nothing sincere about his words.

His chest ached for the rest of the meeting – and would for the rest of the night.

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He did not come home soon – in fact, it was nearing eleven when he finally opened the door, trying to make no sound when he found the apartment plunged into dark. He grimaced, jaw clenching; you were already asleep.

A fresh surge of anger shot into his veins; the university hated him, he was certain of it – and the other way around. He had missed his shot because of a meeting that was literally about nothing. Fuck his life.

He grumbled, the only sound he allowed himself to make when moving around the apartment, switching the dimmest light he could as not to wake you – because disappointing you was enough, the least he could do was not to disturb your sleep.

Frustrated, tired and hungry, he tiptoed to the kitchen to grab a bite. He was starving and even though he was exhausted and craved nothing but to wrap his arms around you and sink into the cushions, he knew hunger would wake him up a few hours later if he went to bed with an empty stomach.

Upon opening the fridge, a surprise welcomed him; a ham & cheese sandwich ready on a plate, a small Tupperware box with pieces of tomatoes and cucumber on side, a sticky note simply reading ‘Stevie’.

His breath got stuck in his throat, heart hammering in his ribcage – that was how moved he was by your gesture. He knew that you must have been as upset as you had been excited to have the fancy dinner with him, but here you were, pushing your sorrows and anger aside and preparing him food, a possible olive branch.

The sandwich was nothing fancy by any means; but God, Steve loved you just a little bit more at that moment for he didn’t have to move a finger to eat so late and you even took care to set his vegetables aside, because you knew how much he hated when the bread got squishy with the juice.  

Gratefully biting into his late-night meal, Steve swore to himself he would spend the rest of his life spoiling you rotten.

When he finally got to cautiously cuddle you from behind – eyeing the absolutely stunning dress you were supposed to wear hanging outside the closet as if there to mock him – you stirred at the dip of the mattress.

Lazily blinking your eyes open, you welcomed him with a raspy hey and he had a half mind to just take the ring from the safety of its velvet box and slip it on your finger right there.

“I’m sorry, babygirl. I’m so so sorry,” he whispered, tentatively wrapping his arm around your midsection, unsure if he wasn’t in disgrace after all. You just hummed and rolled over to face him, burying your face in his chest, heavy limbs wrapping around him as if you were an octopus – the most adorable, precious, beautiful and perfect octopus in the world. His octopus. “I love you so much. I promise to make it up to you.”

“Uh-huh. Looking forward to it. Now sleep,” you mumbled to Steve’s sleepshirt, half-grumpy half-sounding as if not caring for what he was saying at all, causing him to feel warm all over.

Oh he was so going to show you just how he could make it up to you. He would marry the shit out of you.

Just you wait.

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2.

Because of a water incident, Palmeri closed three days after Steve’s first failed attempt – and assumptions were that it would remain so for a month, because they needed to redecorate.

That meant a new plan for Steve, because he could not wait that long. Out of question. He needed to hear you say yes as soon as possible. Yesterday had been too late.

So, he asked Sam for a recommendation – casually, he believed – and somehow ended up with the man looking at him for a few seconds before realization dawned on his face.

“Oooooh, I see how it is! Need something real nice, huh?” Sam whistled, a teasing grin on his face as he patted Steve’s shoulder for support. “Relax, I gotcha, man. All you need; cosy atmosphere, but classy, white table cloths and everything. The right place to take her to in order to butter her up and make her all putty.”

Steve didn’t manage to quite hide his embarrassment at being so obvious, but he knew that Sam was a friend and all his shit-talking was good-natured, always knowing where the boundaries were; he wasn’t a counsellor for nothing.

And Steve had to give it to him – the place he recommended was just what he promised it would be and exactly what Steve needed.

You were all smiles and some giggles, little tipsy on the second glass of the wine, eyes shining in the dim lights, somehow lighting up more whenever you caught him staring at you. It was the perfect display of all the good things you were, ones he adored about you, the light of his life and gazing at him as if he was yours too.

Downing some of the liquid courage himself and with you so gorgeously giddy, Steve felt his confidence building up during the night and was just about ready to get on one knee once you finished your shared dessert.

“This is good!” you gushed, digging the fork if into the cake to get another bite and Steve grinned, unable to help himself as he agreed.

“Uh-huh, sweet. But not as sweet as you.”

You stopped mid-chew, eyes meeting his and he felt his face burn hot with embarrassment at such cheesy comment.

You swallowed, gaze still fixed on him as he busied himself with the sweet treat, and then you chuckled, causing his face to turn entirely red.

“You, Steve Rogers, are so corny sometimes,” you mocked him lightly, but when he looked up, sheepish and with his confidence bruised, he found you all starry-eyed still, watching him adoringly as if he hung the moon – and he would, for you – and Steve felt himself settle again. “But I still love you. Maybe even more for that.”

It was a wonderful opening, things really going his way – but he hesitated a second too long, like an idiot, and the next thing he knew, a string quartet, a damn string quartet, walked straight to the elderly couple two tables over, one of the group congratulating them to their thirtieth anniversary and at that moment…

Well. At that moment, Steve really fucking hated them.

Who fucking cared they were a sweet elderly couple?! Steve could only dream about you two becoming them one day as of now, because they ruined just another of his fucking shots!

He couldn’t believe that he missed his window again.

And what more, you cooed under your breath, a silent aww falling from your lips and Steve knew that anything less than a string quartet accompanying a marriage proposal when delivered in a restaurant was a no-go.

So scratch that one off the list.

All guests clapped their hands, more of awws coming from different directions and you proceeded to take his hand, gentle fingers stroking over his knuckles and Steve knew one thing with absolute certainty; he needed to propose tonight otherwise he might burst.

At home then, he would ask you at home. Who even wanted something as cliché and public as he had planned? Lame. You were a private pair, some people still judged you upon seeing you together; a little intimate proposal in your home after a fancy sweet dinner would be just the thing.

Steve just had to figure how exactly and at what moment to ask. He’d be fine. You’d say yes. Right?

He was so preoccupied with his thoughts and plans that he barely noticed you growing skittish during the taxi ride, but he certainly noticed when you started practically jumping by his side as he was unlocking the door to your apartment, confused by your antics.

The second Steve opened it and stepped inside, he found himself being shoved back-first towards a wall, your hands on his chest, sliding up and down his coat and blindly undoing the buttons as your mouth assaulted his, a soft mewl vibrating against his lips, wandering hands appreciative when they slipped under the lapels of his coat and jacket.

Steve’s head spun at the display of desire, a sudden pleasant dizziness overtaking his body, all rational thoughts vaporizing as you rocked against his crotch, his cock twitching in excitement at the friction and at the way his tongue had to fight against yours. His brain grew foggy at the faint taste of wine and the cake you had shared, his hands automatically grabbing your waist to keep you close, fingers squeezing your hips and ass to urge you closer when he rolled his hips against yours, eliciting needy moans from your lips-

You withdrew for just a second to catch your breath, lips skimming over his jaw, revelling at the feel of his beard on your skin he knew you loved, hasty words whispered into his flesh.

“Dammit, Steve, you look so fucking hot in this suit--- oh Stevie,” you whimpered when his hands slipped under your backside to tease your clothed weeping core, the sensation setting his blood on fire, the delicious friction and your dirty mouth everything that mattered in the world. “Let me suck you off-“

Steve nearly choked on his own spit upon hearing that, almost losing his balance with his legs turning into jelly and all his blood rushing into his dick.

Yeah, Steve might be a professor but he was a simple guy.

When his girl, in those stunning hot as hell dress begged him to let her get on her knees to blow his dick and his mind, he really couldn’t find himself refusing, the coil in his belly searing hot by the time you looked up at him from under your eyelashes, so pretty, doe-eyed, lips kiss-swollen and willing and so fucking devilish as you freed his cock and licked the drop of precum already forming there.

“Fuck, babygirl, what’s gotten into you-“ was all he managed to ask before all he could think off was the velvety heat of your mouth, taking him all in and making him see stars, the jewellery box in the pocket of his coat long forgotten.

And fuck was also his first coherent thought in the morning, when he realized that once again, the proposal attempt ended up being an utter failure.

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3.

Steve had established after his two and half failed proposals that he wouldn’t make any reservations in some dumb restaurant. Just no. Privacy it would be; something personal, accompanied with a simple and yet big enough gesture, him doing something just for you, following with words of you being his world or something.

Yeah.

And for once, it seemed that the universe that had seemed to hate him, finally started playing in his favour.

The weather was going crazy, sun and spring in a middle of February and Steve had a revelation – he was going to take you out for a picnic. It was going to be perfect; he’d take you outside the city, find a quiet corner, just you and him, nothing in your way and more importantly, in his way to pop the question.

Steve was certain that you’d prefer this to anything else anyway, loving when he made an effort to create something for you. He still remembered when you first discovered he enjoyed drawing and you practically melted into a puddle when you found drawings of yourself too, allegedly displaying you prettier than you were – as if.

So, picnic it was.

Except on Friday, the day before THE DAY, Steve woke up with a splitting headache, his whole body hurting, nose full and lungs as if stuffed with cotton wool. He blamed the crazy weather, but it didn’t really matter where this sickness came from – he felt like shit.

He groaned and downright punched the alarm on his phone, startling you awake.

With bleary gaze, he registered you rolling over in his arms, squirming at him sleepily as he let his eyelids slip shut again.

“Steve, hun, are you okay?” you asked him softly, voice husky as he loved to hear it when you woke up, too adorable for him to keep his hands off you.

He sure as fuck wasn’t thinking about sweet and filthy morning loving now; he would have coughed out his lungs if he tried to move too much and some parts of him might fall off judging by how much everything hurt.

“Yeah,” he rasped, throat scratchy at the single word and as if from a distance, he heard a noise of sympathy, your palm instantly finding his forehead, gentle touch soothing against his burning skin.

“You’re absolutely not okay. Stevie, you’re burning up,” you whispered compassionately and Steve blinked his eyes open, the little light in the room causing him to snap them close again immediately. Ouch.

“Fuck my liiiiife,” he groaned, prolonging the last syllable, which proved to be a wrong thing to do, sending him into a couching fit due to his scratchy throat.

Your hands roamed his shoulders and back as he rolled over to his side from you, hoping to suck in some air to continue coughing.

“Oh Stevie, I’m sorry. I’ll bring you some medicine when I’m back from school, yeah? And I’ll make some soup,” you assured him kindly, dropping a kiss to his shoulder before your pleasant warmth disappeared, leaving him too cold and hot at the same time.

Seriously. FUCK HIS LIFE.

Grunting, he fell to his back, exhausted by one stupid coughing fit, whole body heavy; and he must have fallen asleep too, because the next thing he knew, soft lips were touching his forehead, tender fingers brushing messy strands of hair away. He stirred, forcing his eyes open to be greeted by a sight of that angelic face of yours, complete with a halo of light around you.

“I already called Bucky. He’ll sort out your classes today, alright? There’s a tea on your nightstand along with some last Tylenol we have.”

Steve squinted in the direction of the piece of furniture you mentioned and sure enough, there it was, everything you said it would.

What a pretty dutiful nurse you were. God, he loved you.

As he eyed you then, deep sense of longing settled in his swimming stomach, more so as he didn’t miss the gorgeous thermo leggings and long sweater hugging your figure, reaching your mid-thighs.

All Steve wanted was to pull you back to him so he had a human furnace in bed with him, the soothing smell of your shampoo to comfort him – even though he probably wouldn’t be able to smell it. But his hands would still be able to explore your delicious body, grope and hold it close to his and you could maybe ramble about everything and anything, lulling him to sleep.

But no, you were leaving to school, leaving him alone in the apartment.

Just him, himself and his fucking flu.

He eyed you wistfully, lips pursed at your concerned expression.

“When you’ll be back?”

The wrinkle between your brows smoothened, a smile playing in the corner of your mouth.

“I have class until eleven. I see what I can do. I’m gonna have to hit the pharmacy and make some shopping,” you explained patiently, casing Steve to groan. Too long. So so long… Your smile widened, another kiss landing on his temple this time. “But I’ll be back before you know it. Get some rest, Professor Rogers.”

Your teasing tone made him growl, the action effectively sending him into another coughing fit and through glassy eyes, he saw you disappear from the room with one last glance over your shoulder.

Steve closed his eyes and breathed in deeply – oh, the delicious air – and then buried himself in the covers, praying that a decent sleep would make him feel better.

It didn’t, not quite. What did make him feel much better was the Tylenol and the sirup you brought along.

The absolute best was when you were there for him to cuddle you to sleep in the evening; somewhere in the back of his mind, he was aware that he was being a giant baby and was being utterly ridiculous, but God help him, this was all he needed the whole day.

He sighed blissfully as he hugged your midsection while you were sitting propped on the back-rest, soft light from the nightlamp illuminating the pages of the book you were reading. You were warmth, the gentle kind and Steve felt you seeping into him, fingers of one hand raking through his hair; he felt himself getting high on your loving care and cough sirup.

“I love having you here,” he muttered into the fabric of your pyjama, feeling you shift in your position a little, probably as you looked at him.

“Yeah?” you asked, sounding as if you were smiling, maybe even laughing at him; but he couldn’t care less, already drifting off to sleep, just content to have you.

“You’re warm and nice… and the prettiest nurse. And I love you. You’re my everything.”

“Oh Stevie,” you cooed sweetly, kissing the crown of his head and he preened at the sensation, smiling lazily. “I love you too.”

His heart skipped a beat as he nuzzled into your flesh and heard you gently toss the book away, your other hand now caressing his cheek.

“Yeah? Will you always be here? I want you to always be with me,” he admitted sheepishly, drawing a soft giggle and earning a kiss on his forehead.

“God, you’re adorable like this…”

Steve grunted, discontent with your reaction. “Not an answer.”

“I’ll always be here if you want me to, Stevie,” you answered dutifully, causing warmth fill his chest even if your body was shaking with hushed laughter; he felt it, but didn’t care. For your words however, he did; phew, as if he ever wanted something else, as if you had the right to question that!

He really needed to propose soon… just not tomorrow. You’d probably say no if he asked you, blaming his request on the fever. Naively.

“I wanna,” he mumbled, trying to squeeze you tighter. “Mine. My pretty girl. My babygirl. Forever.”

“Forever is a long time,” you noted, smile once again lacing your voice, along with an emotion, oh so soft one, he didn’t have the capacity to identify anymore. “But that’s what it’ll be if that’s what you want.”

Finally satisfied and with determination in the back of his mind, Steve let your love bridge him over to the dreamland, distantly aware of your fingers still playing with his hair.

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+1

Steve’s mother used to say his that flu lasted a week under a doctor’s care; and seven days without it. Of course, when he was younger with many health issues, it was more complicated than that, but he got the message.

Under your care, he felt considerably better after five days, only a mild case of a runny nose remaining. On a Thursday morning, he even found himself awake before you did, before your alarm went off.

Contemplating whether he should stay in bed with you or get shit done, he lazily scooped away a bit and propped himself on his elbow to feast his eyes on his pretty nurse.

Your hair was a messy halo around your head, your brows were lightly crooked as if you were having an unpleasant dream, your lips parted just a fraction, the softest snort escaping you.

Steve felt himself grin, a love-sick lift of the corners of his lips.

You were so freaking cute.

And seeing you, relaxed, but clearly catching up with sleep to beat your exhaustion to which he abundantly contributed, he knew he couldn’t stay in bed; in fact, he had to make you breakfast to bed, for all the troubles he put you through and for the attentive care you lavished him with.

Sure, when he was getting overly needy and whiny or cranky, you weren’t shy to call him out on his shit – which only made him love you more – but otherwise you were admirably patient.

As if he hadn’t already known that you were a keeper before that; this only solidified his conviction. If everything about you didn’t scream put a ring on it, then he wasn’t Steven Grant Rogers.

Hell, he had a half-mind to propose you just at that moment, all domestic atmosphere and sweet gesture like breakfast in bed, but he wasn’t certain it wouldn’t look like the past few days were what pushed him over the edge. That would only be a half-truth--- quarter-truth?

Shaking his head at his own dumb thoughts, he gathered the pancakes, yogurt, various pieces of fruit and obviously, a coffee, laying it on a tray he had nearly forgotten he owned and tiptoed to the bedroom, honestly surprised that you hadn’t woken up yet with him fumbling around.

He stopped dead in his tracks when you sighed and stirred, rolling over and stretching out a hand as if in a search for him, only to find the space empty. Something between a hum and a damn meowl fell from your lips and Steve had to remind himself what it was he wanted to do besides trying his best to find out how exactly he could make you repeat that sound.

So precious. Absolutely adorable. Beautiful. Tempting.

You clutched the empty sheets, but didn’t wake and Steve crossed the distance to the bed, carefully setting the tray on the nightstand as he went to sit on the bed next to your waist, a dopy smile on his face.

Laying a hand on your thigh, he squeezed a little, attempting to wake you gently; he knew you got jumpy when something tickled your face, so this was the safer option.

You stirred once again, but didn’t wake, your eyes only fluttering open when he called your name a few times, alternating with your favourite term of endearment.

You squinted at him, appearing confused and groaning. Steve grinned.

“Morning, sunshine,” he hummed, finally allowing himself to run the pads of his fingers from your forehead to your cheek and jaw, leaning into drop a kiss to your lips.

He froze, his brain on alert as he registered how hot your face felt.

The faint snoring. Squinting against light. Not waking up sooner than him. Your face pretty much burning to touch.

Oh no.

“Babygirl… are you feeling sick?” Steve whispered hesitantly, met with a bleary gaze and a pout.

“Wasn’t feeling great even yesterday evening…” you said, voice hoarse – whether from sleep or the flu Steve had managed to infect you with, he couldn’t tell.

But he certainly felt guilty, even if it was inevitable, really; with all you sweet care and constant proximity, it was only a matter of time. Not that it made him feel any better.

“Oh sweetheart, I’m so sorry-“

“Not your fault-“

“Kinda is-“

“Steve dammit!” you hissed, your eyes flying open fully and Steve knew what was coming; still, he grimaced as you coughed. “Shit. I hate flu.”

“Tell me about it. You think you can eat something?” he fussed, snapping into his nurse mode right away, ready for your roles to reverse.

You hummed and tried to sit, your gaze falling on the nightstand for the first time. Your expression, having been twisted in a grimace, softened instantly. As you turned to him, he suddenly felt sheepish. Was he acting like a love-sick fool?

“You made me breakfast to bed?” you cooed, snuggling into the covers before gesturing for him to help you sit up. “You’re the best.”

“I’ll be better if I make you some tea to go with it… and bring cough sirup… and stuff, yeah?”

You smiled like a loon – well, you tried, the result kinda faint, a testimony to your exhaustion – and Steve quickly rose to his feet.

“You’re the best.”

“Nope, that’s you. Eat your breakfast, babygirl.”

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Steve could tell you still didn’t feel exactly alright and the idea of eating wasn’t thrilling to you, but the pleaser you were, you tried your best for him to see that you appreciated his effort to make breakfast. When he brought you the tea, the medicine and water to down it, you were hallway through the pancakes, even though you seemed to force yourself into every bite.

“You don’t have to make yourself sicker just because you feel like you have to eat this, you know,” he hummed nonchalantly, causing you to grimace and take another two bites before sighing and pushing the tray away.

“It’s really yummy though… I think,” you stated, a wry smile playing in one corner of your lips. “Thank you.”

And you sounded so honestly grateful, clearly attempting for the smile to look real even with your eyes blazed and your features undeniably displaying tiredness, that Steve had to chuckle as he handed you the pills.

“Glad you liked it, sweetheart.”

You went to drop a careful kiss to his cheek when a coughing fit took you by surprise, starling him and resulting in you clutching both your chest and head, wide hurt eyes looking up at him as he smiled, tight-lipped and compassionate; he knew exactly how you felt.

And you were still kinda adorable, pouting a bit, looking at Steve as if he could save you from the evil flu monster.

“I hate flu… but I really like you. Thank you for taking care of me,” you said sincerely, emphasizing your point with an obviously unplanned sneeze.

Steve lips twitched, but so did his heart. His hands went to caress your hair, earning a pleased hum.

“Just returning the favour.”

“Uh-huh. Don’t think I was that nice.”

“You were,” he assured you, feeling need to add a little piece of important information, just to show how much he meant it. “Just made me fall in love with you all over again.”

“Sweet-talker. I bet that’s all gone now, seeing me about to go through a box of tissues a day,” you chuckled weakly, nearly sinking into the cushions.

Steve wasn’t sure what was it he was suddenly overcome with; how or in which exact moment it sneaked into his conscience, a crazy insane thought and the untameable feeling in his gut that nudged him to do it.

To do it right now. To tell you, truly and from the depth of his heart, how much you meant to him. How much he was sure you always would.

“No, it’s not. I want to take care of you,” he whispered, hesitantly taking a hold of your slightly clammy hands and gently squeezing. You reciprocated the action, even if weakly.

“I want to take care of you and I want you to take care of me. I want to have you by my side every day, in our home, in our bed,” he continued, for once not talking only about different ways of making you moan his name when mentioning a bed. “I want to kiss you stupid whenever I get the chance, I want to laugh with you when you’re happy and hold you when you feel like crap. I want us to fight the whole world if they tell us that our love is wrong, because I know there’s nothing more right than me loving you and you loving me.”

The words spilled from his lips without much thinking, just one following other, somehow making sense, he hoped.

The strange buzz of nerves in his ears was so loud that he barely registered you breathed out his name.

“Steve-“

His eyes never left your face, watching it crumble under the weight of his declaration, already glassy eyes turning wetter, breathing ragged almost as much as his was from the rapid fire of words. Your lips parted in beautiful awe, that beautiful awe he had seen before, whenever you seemed to be shocked by how deep his need for you ran.

There was no questioning what should come next. Only half-aware of doing so, Steve had already prepared the ground.

“Stay right here,” he blurted out, giving your hands another quick squeeze before straightening rapidly and nearly tripping over his feet as he rushed towards his desk, opening the third drawer. Your voice, laced with both confusion and overwhelming emotion, followed him.

“I- I’m not going anywhere. What’s-“

“Sh-shh,” Steve hissed distractedly and took a deep breath as his fingers finally met with the box, gripping it tightly and his palm covering it as he stalked back to the bed, heart hammering in his ribcage.

This was the right moment, right? It seemed ridiculous, but god, so so right.

“You’re lucid, right?” he asked just to make sure, wavering only for a bit; you might be sick, even have a headache maybe, but you certainly appeared lucid enough a moment ago. But maybe that would be the reason you’d say no?

Shit, he felt like teenager about to ask his first crush to sit with him at lunch.

“I—I think? I’m just hella confused…“ you stuttered, causing his already wild heart to skip a beat upon hearing the nerves in your voice.

Your eyes, wide with confusion and yet slightly narrow because light hurt, watched Steve carefully as he dropped to his knees by your bedside and he didn’t think he ever saw you looking more endearing.

Steve had never been more certain of the fact that he wanted you to be his wife; and yet, and maybe precisely because of that, a lump formed in his throat. He took a deep calming breath, bracing himself.

“I love you. I love your mind, your body, your soul and everything that’s you and I—I think you’re the most wonderful woman I have ever met and had the luck to fall for. So I…”

With another heartskip, loud pounding in his head and maybe a tiny bit of a shake to his hands, he rose to only one knee, not missing your expression turning into a picture perfect of shock when he held out the box he had been thinking about for too long.

“Oh my god, Steve-“

“Please let me do this,” he whispered, barely audible, mostly because while you seemed absolutely stunned, you didn’t look angry or horrified, so he sensed a chance.

“I’m running a fever, my nose is running too and I’m--- ew all over-“ you protested weakly, a tear actually running down your cheek, but then you chuckled, a hand flying up to cover your mouth and Steve felt his confidence rise.

“You’re not, and even if you were I wouldn’t care. You’re my everything and wish nothing more than to make you mine officially.” Unable to wait any longer under you attentive and entirely adoring gaze, he opened the box and said your full name, nearly choking on it under the overwhelming joy of the moment – because he already knew. He knew what you were gonna say; you had it written all over you face. “Will you marry me?”

Steve knew. He was so sure that he knew--- and yet. Yet. As the silence prolonged, lasting seconds, minutes even – hours, it must have been – Steve felt the nervous coil in his gut twist painfully.

He watched you with torturous anticipation as you were; semi-sat up on a bed, hurting, probably beginning to sweat through your pyjama and drinking chamomile tea to get rid of the bug you had caught from him, and here he was, proposing.

In sickness and health indeed; and in some absurd way, this all made perfect sense to him… well, it had, a minute ago.

You looked like a million thoughts were racing through your head, and Steve felt his heart sink to his stomach. What if you truly were thinking he was crazy-

“Yes,” you said at last and Steve released the breath he was holding, endlessly relieved, the heaviness weighting a ton finally falling from his shoulders. Oh Chirst, thank fuck—he really had been getting worried- “Yes, I-“

Relief blended into delight as he heard you speak the beautiful word again.

Yes. Yes, you wanted to be his wife.

Yes, you wanted to marry him!!

An incredulous chuckle spilled from his lips and he tossed the box on the bed, swiftly moving up and grabbing your face to kiss you stupid as he wanted and had said that he always would.

You made a startled noise, but you giggled too, grasping onto his shoulders and his nape and kissing back with all you got—and then you were pulling away, fighting for breath, because flu, duh, he needed to be careful with you, but-

You agreed to marry him!

Keeping you as close as possible while allowing you to breathe, his eyes happily roamed your face, so pretty and adorable and the knowledge of him being able waking up next to that face for the rest of his life sent his heart into frenzy, sparkles of pure joy filling his chest.

“I love you! Thank you, babygirl,” he exclaimed, kissing you once more, a short but intense encounter of lips that caused you to giggle again—but he didn’t give a shit if he was being ridiculous. Your eyes, even if tired, seemed to glow now, happy twinkles dancing in your irises, telling him you were just as excited and delighted as he was. “Thank you-“

“You’re so crazy-“ you mumbled, dropping a kiss to his shoulder as you still shook with laughter and Steve simply climbed on the bed fully, wrapping you in his arms tightly.

He could sing at how you fit into his arms.

“I am. For you.”

“I can’t believe you proposed to me while I’m lying sick on a bed,” you mumbled over his shoulder, sounding as if you were complaining a little.

“In sickness and health?” he offered nervously, holding you tighter just in case you were going to back out now. Which was not an option.

He had to physically put the ring on your finger. Right now. Then you wouldn’t be able to change your mind.

In the back of his brain, an annoying voice told him that this was not how it worked, that there was no guarantee. But Steve shushed that voice and withdrew only enough to reach for the box and with a grin so wide he could feel his cheeks hurt from the strain, he took a hold of your left hand, slipping the ring on.

He didn’t miss the way your breath caught and he didn’t think the flu was to blame for that; the ring looked lovely on your hand. And Steve was a smidge proud of how he managed to make it fit perfectly.

“Steve… the ring-”

“You don’t like it?” he worried in an instant as he detected a new emotion in your voice.

You went to lightly slap his shoulder, rolling your eyes – an action you apparently regretted by the silent groan that followed; just another reminded of your sickness.

“Shush, you dummy. It’s--- breath-taking, but-“ you bit down on your lower lip, clearly hesitant to speak your mind and Steve didn’t find it at all comforting that you said you did like then ring. Not with the but. You sounded almost guilty, which was… strange. “But must have been so expensive and we still haven’t really-“

Oh. Oh.

Steve felt his lips spread back into a smile.

His sweet, sweet girl, responsible and perfect. He hated the reminder of your father’s behaviour, of the fact that you were ashamed on his behalf and felt guilty.

Steve didn’t want that.

“If I tell you it wasn’t, will you be mad?” he offered, watching carefully for your reaction, and your thoughtful expression turned into a confused one.

“Wasn’t?“

“I just had it cleaned and re-sized.”

You blinked, eyelids heavy, and tilted your head in bewilderment—melting into a brief panic and Steve realized what must have crossed your mind.

His stomach clenched in horror at you even considering it. You might have thought it was meant for another woman from his life.

Which it was, but not the way you thought!

“It was my ma’s!” he blurted out in panic, causing you to flinch a bit in fright of his suddenly louder voice. Steve shook his head – he was so messing this whole proposal thing up – clearing his throat, he observed your face, now full of emotion he couldn’t read. “…is that okay?”

There were tears prickling in your eyes, no words leaving your mouth as he had managed to render you speechless and he could punch himself for making you feel whatever you were feeling.

He had to fix this, fast.

“We can absolutely pick up something else if you don’t like the idea!” he was quick to offer, his heart speeding up when you still didn’t say a word. But you didn’t seem… that mad. What was happening in your head though, that was a mystery to him. “It’s just… she always told me that it was the second most precious thing she had left after dad, right after me, and that she wants me to give it to-- please don’t cry.”

Yes, he made the tears spill. There were a few rolling down your cheeks and Steve… he was starting to recognize the emotions playing in your expression, but he couldn’t entirely put his finger on it.

Honestly, he couldn’t tell whether you were so touched by the whole inherited ring gesture or if you were hating him with your very being for ruining some picture-perfect proposal you had been dreaming about since you were five; angry and disappointed that he didn’t even have the decency to buy you your own ring.

Probably a bit of both.

“Steve, you romantic idiot, come here,” you choked out, by a miracle not coughing for once and before he could even react and let the relief sink in, you grabbed him by his shoulders and pulled hard.

You had a surprisingly a lot of strength for someone coming down with a flu – actually, being down with a flu.

He landed on you, barely catching himself before he could crush you, a surprised laugh spilling from his lips, delight once again lighting up his world.

“I love you, Steve,” you whispered, pecking his lips, fingers sinking to his hair and that moment, Steve was in heaven. “So much.”

He grinned wide, wrapping his arms around you and holding you to his chest as tight as he could, feeling both his own heartbeat and yours, tumbling happily and together.

“And I love you… future Mrs. Rogers.”

⊱-◦-◦-◦-◦-◦-◦ ✉ ◦-◦-◦-◦-◦-◦-⊰

Tied to you (next in timeline)

S.R.masterlist

Attached masterlist

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Not gonna lie. Thought of posting this in four parts of maybe at least two (3 and +1), but then I thought, screw it, let’s post 7,7k words at once. I hope you made it through all of them.

What’s coming next? I have no idea... maybe it’s who’s ‘coming’ next 👀

Thank you for reading!

[shegairowmyamo]

Yandere Turbo x Reader headcanons

ok so im done waiting to try and get a second tumblr account so i'm just gonna post it heer and bicehouse i know that there are gonna be those who are STARVING for content like this and i'm one of those so i decided to make it myself. I'm dipping my toes in the diper end of the pool now but you know, baby steps. Besides, I'm thinking of doing more things like this but this has all been for fun but i will warn you that i'm not used to writing a lot of lovey dovey stuff. I hope you enjoy it.

If you're sly enough maybe you can get this guy rapt around your finger but believe me or not, Turbo is smart but his jealousy can get the best of him. If the backstory that Felix told Calhoun told us anything is that Turbo will do anything to get rid of computision, so who isn't to say that he would go at the same lengths for you too.

He doesn't trust you with ALLOT of the residents of the arcade, some of the onley few is Felix and “maybe” the Twins™ and perhaps even Tapper for whatever reason.

If he ever sees you talking to another person he will 1. Assume that the one who is talking to you was the one to start the conversation: and hopefully 2. Try and restrain his obvious jealousy and rage with a strained smile and and not going all out yelling at the purson: 3. “Calmly” walk up to the heathen who dares come close to his prize possession. Now this is fun and all to imagine but what if the heathen was hitting on you… In which this bitches jealousy will go true the roof and all logic goes out the window he will go in, engines roaring his car to life (idk how cars work but this sounds cool) as he sweeps in.

Oh you could smell the burning hot jealousy from a mile away, and now that i think about it… It smells like burnt rubber… Basically what i'm getting at here is that Turbo would totally run this jackass over. He will receive a death glare everytime Turbo sees the ass hat. Menttoly declaring him as a threat and putting him on his bucket list of games to unplug.

The aftermath of all this would either be just him having an arm around your waist for the rest of the night and when someone comes too close for his liking He will pull you closer to him “for protection” as he puts it. Or you would have to go into one of your games and calm him down because Turbo is having a full blown attack of some kind. He's repeating words and sometimes sentences, he's holding you close while his vision is blurry from the amount of rage he feels. Being mad at that no good loser for daring getting close to you yada yada. He demands and expects to be cuddled and kissed while being told how great he is and how you're never leaving him.

This (gremlin) man would unplugged any game for you even if its just “because that character was mean to me :(“ and he will be like (idk how to write a character with a lisp) “don't worry babe you don't need to worry about that asshole for mutch long” cue evil laughter. But as silly as that sounded we both know his intention, and they are far from silly.

Turbo sometimes has a hard time hiding the 8-bit hearts that pop out of into the air surrounding him and in his eyes, especially the time he realized he was “in love” with you. And then it turned into an obsession and became overly possessive over you. He will do like that thing where he will just ask for a hug out of nower to get your attention and out of your line of sight he will stare down the person you were talking to. It is creapy as fuck but also cinda hot.. I mean like yah having someone wanting to be with you 24/7 can sound kinda exhausting but the image of him being so protective over someone just makes me swoon you know what i mean.

The first person you're going to see when you exit your game is obviously Turbo, he will be just casually leaning on a wall asking what took you so long in a playful manner. And then he will casually just ask you if you want to go to Tappers or some other game to hangout in while ignoring any protest or excuses that you tell him. But don't be fooled by his careless demeanor because he will store those little protests in a jar of grudges.

If i had to guess this man's love languages it would be words of affirmation and his close second being receiving gifts. So inflating his ego might not be such a bad thing on your part. But on everybody else's “whistle”. If anything it would help you survive this guy from anything getting out of hand if you were to refuse him too many times. One day right after closing time he will insist that you must be so tired and that you should hang out in his game for the night but after you both get there and Turbo make sure that there are no witnesses he will knock your lights out. And even if there were witnesses it would probably be just one or both of the twins. But they both have noticed the change in Turbo and his increased aggressive behavior and they didn't wanna get involved so they both agreed to keep quiet. Man it seems that everyone in Turbo Time is a selfish git.

The absence of you in your game forste Litwick to unplug it for good which makes your home just a memory of the retro past. Turbo with a sinisterly joyful smile on his face watches as your expresion turns even more sorrowful and helpless when he tells you the news. The twins have this sinking feeling ever since the day they saw you get kidnapped and after your game got unplugged it got even worse but it made them more determined to beat Turbo in the races they have as their own revenge. But a part of them feared that all that anger was gonna get taken out on you and it was confirmed one specific day when Turbo went to mod knows where and came back a few hours later with blood on his knuckles. After that they backed down with the whole winning thing a little just for your sake.

One day tho one of the twins were looking for something when he heard heavy breathing coming from one of the places in Turbo Time that he usually didn't go to, whoever was there heard him and abruptly stopped. It encuregd him to wallck kloser to the noise and when he did, oh boi. The piercing eyes of a tied up purson (aka you) stared at him in disbelief and fear. Thinking at first that they were Turbo but when you realized that it was one of the twins your eyes soon changed to desporation. Releasing now what the twin had stumbled upon he quickly retreated, the desporet cry and anguished scream for his help still haunt him especially those eyes. What did Turbo do to you…

Turbo at this point only sees you as an object, his prize possession but he would never harm you at least not physically. He wants to keep his winners cup spotless, that includes any dents or bruises. And the bloody knuckles are just from him punching the wall right beside your head to scare you and to get his point across if it wasn't obvious from the start.

[haravath0t]

Maybe It’s Time

Pairing: a bit of Steve x Reader, but leaning towards Bucky x Reader in the end

Warning: angst, fluff in the end! Feelings...

A/N: So... another comfort fic... gotta thank @world-of-aus for helping me on this one! Bucket, thank you for literally being a real one and helping me through it all! I owe you so much girl! It’s been a hard one for me as of late folks, so this one kinda feels like a comfort fic to me personally. Kinda out of the blue, but as always, writing seems to be my escape. So for all who are going through something, I hope you know I am here for you and I am willing to lend an ear for you guys! I hope you all seek a bit of comfort through this one shot! Enjoy! 

Bucky’s eyes gently opened, hearing something coming from the other room. Something that has to have become a regular thing for him now for a long while. Your piano playing. 

He recognized this piece more than ever: Debussy’s Clair de Lune.

He sat up gently on the edge of the bed, grunting softly while Alpine softly purred as she stirred herself awake. It was raining; a soft pitter patter of the rain falling against the glass windows accompanied with your soft playing would have been enough to have kept him asleep, his nightmares slowly fading away and going into the wonderful dreams that he had once dreamt of. However, tonight’s playing was different, for the once playful, joyous, and thoughtful tunes coming from those black and white keys have been melancholic for quite a while. Too long of a while. Tonight, something within Bucky Barnes compelled him to do something different from these previous nights. Rather than admire your playing from afar, letting your emotions run wild by yourself, he’ll make his presence known. 

Alpine meowed, watching her owner slowly put on his fuzzy slippers (courtesy of you) before she fell asleep. Bucky smiled sleepily, giving her one more pet before quietly making his way out of his room, and into the dark living room in your guys’ shared floor. The sight in front of him definitely reflected Clair de Lune: beautiful, yet filled with emotion, filled with sorrow. It hurt him even more to know just why you were hurting.

You were restless. You were critical. You tried, you fought, you pushed, you pulled. 

Yet it was never enough.

At the end of the day, you got hurt. You were thrown away, rendered useless to someone who you loved deeply and passionately. Someone who you devoted yourself to, thinking they’d dedicate themselves in the same manner. You remember that day clearly, feelings still fresh from a year ago.

You were still wrapping your head around the fact that you were part of the half who disappeared in the blip. However, thoughts were brushed aside as he smiled softly at you as Bruce got everything ready, coming towards you as you returned the smile on your face. You wrapped your arms around him, your soft eyes looking at him with love and devotion, as it always had. “Be careful,” you whisper into his lips with a smile. “I will, Y/N… don’t you worry.” He says with a smile nuzzling his nose against yours. “I just wanna ensure your safety, for your sake,” You reply with a giggle. “My sake or yours?” He questions with a much bigger smile. “How about we settle with both?” You whisper, your giggles ringing in Steve’s ears. He couldn’t help the long and loving kiss that was shared between the both of you before he went off to the platform. 

You watched your boyfriend, standing in his suit, Mjolnir in one hand and the case of the Infinity Stones in the other, standing in the middle of the platform with a determined look on his face. You smiled even more, for Steve Rogers, being himself, has managed to save the world once again with the Avengers. You smiled alongside Bucky and Sam who were watching him disappear out of sight. “And returning in 5… 4… 3… 2...1…” Bruce counts down, only for you three to see no one back on the platform. You began to worry. Did something go wrong? What happened? Is he okay? 

Your mind was laden with panic and it wasn’t until you saw a figure sitting alongside the lake, shield propped up next to him. Confusion laced your worried features, but the two men knew. Sam talked to him as you looked on in shock, mind still connecting things together. You shook your head in denial as you saw a wedding ring on his finger. At that moment you knew.

You weren’t enough.

You slowly made your way, deciding to be strong, heart wrenching when you saw this once burly, blond man now with wrinkles, haggard, and with a wedding ring. 

“Y/N,” he says, but you cut him off, forcing a smile on your face, forcing your tears to not fall down. 

“N-no. It’s okay… I.. I get it… I’m.. I’m happy for you, Steve.”

You hated it. You hated having to have your hand held by him one last time, a squeeze of hands quietly speaking of the terms that you both are now on. You were never his. Never. Peggy remained his one and true love that beat time and space. And who were you to argue? She rightfully gained her place. Maybe it was time for you to accept the fact that there was no room for you in Steven Grant Rogers’ life. 

But that didn’t stop the hurt that still clouds your mind and thoughts. The remembrance of the hurt and the deception on your side of the story was still fresh. The repeat of the memory merely adds salt to your still fresh wounds. It’s been inside you since then, the neverending ache courses through you. So you play. You play the grand piano and its keys with your heart out on your sleeve not caring for the sobs that leave your lips, hands gracefully touching the keys of the piano, a slow crescendo coming in as the feelings of hurt slowly grow. Your eyes stay shut as your left hand starts to move more and more, right hand playing chords and the sorrowful melody. By the time the climax of the song arrives, you are sobbing even more than before, body shaking as the pain takes on a more tangible form on your piano. Your head is swirling, your body feeling like it was going to float, you were so clouded in your mind, until a particular man with a metal arm sat quietly next to you, putting you back in your space, where you currently were.  

However, you stopped dead in your tracks, embarrassed that your best friend had caught you in this particular moment, so your eyes try their hardest to remain on the keys. You already knew that his ocean blue ones were staring at you. His metal hand carefully rests upon your right hand, lightly interlocking his fingers with yours. 

“I’m not over it either,” he whispers in your ear.

Again, you cry, turning your body slightly to cling to his figure. Cries slowly turn into sobs. Hugging Bucky for dear life, you said the things that have been in your head for so long. 

“B-Buck.. Why did he leave?! Why?! And when we just came back?! Why Peggy, Buck?! What does she have that I don’t?! What has our time together meant to him?! Is it because I’m not as skinny as her?! Is she smarter than me? Is she funnier? More humorous? Is she kinder? Is she-”

Bucky felt the same way. He knew how you felt. He felt that way about the punk too. He wasn’t thinking of Captain America, but Steve. The little kid from Brooklyn, the same guy who had asthma, who put newspapers in his shoes, who hid an extra key under a brick. He felt like he lost his place too. However, he knew how you felt was just as bad. He understood you. It pained him to see you crying. Admittedly enough, he only hoped that you look beautiful in his eyes despite your sobs and tears. A literal angel, he’d think to himself. Unfortunate that he can’t teach his best friend a thing or two about taking care of his girl. You were in pain for so long.

His hands cupped your wet cheeks and slowly wiped the tears with his thumbs, a tiny smile when he feels you relax to his touch, kissing your forehead to further soothe you. “Steve doesn’t know what was in front of the whole time, sweetheart,” he whispers. 

“He did… apparently I’m only a substitute till there was a way. That’s all I am to anyone. A substitute.”

“I never thought of you that way.” He admits quietly, so quietly, that only you both can hear, causing you to look up at him in surprise. “H-Huh? But…” “I said what I said, Y/N… I mean it. You were, are, and always will be such a sweet, kind, and beautiful dame. There’s no kind like you anywhere here, not even Peggy or anyone for that matter can replicate what you have sweetheart. So who cares who’s skinnier? Who cares if one is more funny? In the end of the day, we knew you did all you could. It hurts. I know. But, you’re gonna have that one guy who is gonna treat ya like no man ever could. I’ll make sure of that.” He whispers, looking at you dead in the eyes with understanding and love in his eyes. A small smile finally kisses your face. Not a fake one, but a small genuine one. One that only someone like James Buchanan Barnes would notice. “That’s my girl.” He whispers and smiles, hugging you once again.

He pulls away, starting to play the first few notes of Clair de Lune, eyes carefully watching yours, an invitation. You shyly joined in, allowing yourself to take your place and playing a part. You and James couldn’t help the smile that goes on your faces as it starts to progress. You watched as both his flesh and metal hand graced the keys effortlessly, nicely paired along with yours as they also graced the keys, completing this song’s melody. What was wreaking of pain and sorrow turned pensive, calming, even providing a form of resolution. You guys smiled as you both played your notes louder and louder the two of you effortlessly mirroring each other, no need to say the dynamic, the mood, the notes to play, it was all unplanned, yet it still sounded beautiful. A giggle leaves your mouth, another genuine one for the first time, which causes Bucky to smile big, happy to see you smiling again. He watches as your guys’ fingers glide through the keys, hands sometimes weaving in and out harmoniously, never causing extra struggle. 

“Thank you, James… I really really feel better after all of that” you say softly, letting yourself nuzzle your face into his torso, hugging the super soldier tightly. “You always know what to say to me. You always know what to do. Always have. Thank you,” You whisper, smiling softly as the man tightens his hold on you. You both chuckled when a yawn now leaves your lips, resulting in Bucky scooping you up bridal style. “Not a problem, sweetheart. I’m always gonna be here. M’not going anywhere I promise.” He says softly, yet in a determined tone. He vowed to himself no matter where he stood in your life, he was gonna make sure you were loved and cared for. He always wanted that for you. Always looked at you in a way he never thought he’d look at a woman. Even today the way he perceived you was the same: a kind, beautiful, giving, and optimistic person who was kind to anyone but herself. “Why don’t we get you to bed, huh? I think you deserve this to say the least.” He says softly, making his way through the hallway into your bedroom. 

“A-Actually. Do you think I can just lay with you tonight?” You ask shyly. You felt comfortable in his arms. He made you feel warm, protected. You didn’t want to let that go. Not now. Of course, Bucky could not say no, so he carried you to his room, where you both met a sleeping Alpine perched on her cute tower. You smiled as he laid you down gently before he laid next to you, an arm wrapped around your waist. “Thank you, Buck…you know I’m grateful for you,” you murmured sleepily, nuzzling into the crook of his neck and relaxing. Bucky only smiled and rubbed your back for comfort. “Never forget I’ll do anythin’ for you sweetheart. Promise.” He whispers, sleep taking over him a bit quicker than a normal night. You smiled as you watched his breathing steady out, knowing he was asleep. You couldn’t help the grin from ear to ear before you slept yourself. It will take a while for this pain of yours to end, but… maybe, just maybe it’s time for you to stop looking at what’s behind and what’s beyond. Maybe it’s time for you to rediscover your worth, who you can love and who can love you.  Maybe it’s time that you trust yourself, for you are worth it all and you alone is a good enough reason to live your life as it should. And maybe, just maybe… you’ll see where the brunette man with a metal arm in front of you will stand in your life. Just one step at a time and one day at a time, you tell yourself as you slowly drift into dreamland. However, you were happy, for this was the first night you felt like you were enough, and felt that hope that used to reside in your heart. For once in a long time, you didn’t feel the weight in your heart anymore, for behind you, Bucky Barnes was right behind you carrying it right with you.

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[fanfoolishness]

the wheeling stars, amidst the dark (The Mandalorian)

(Peli Motto’s glad to see one of her favorite customers, until she realizes he’s come alone.  Peli + Din friendship, set after The Rescue.  A study on grief, friendship, sorrow and hope.  5368 words.)

***

Winter on Tatooine was Peli’s favorite season, a time when the fierce desert heat gave up a little of its cruelty.  There was less sweating through her jumpsuit; not no sweating, of course, just less.  Water prices were better, and smugglers preferred to visit more often when the suns weren’t baking the sands below.  More people, more ships in need of repair, more work.  It was a good time of year.

She was at a lull today, though.  Nothing to worry about.  Happened now and then.  She passed the time setting the droids on maintenance duties in between games of sabacc, checking up on inventory, and drinking through a pot of caf.  It was actually cool enough this afternoon she could take her caf hot instead of chilled, and not feel like she was boiling alive.  She took a sip.  If nothing else, she was damn good at enjoying the little things.

She heard engines overhead and glanced up to see what was heading her way.  An Intel X4 gunship, by the sound of it.  It soared into view, and she narrowed her eyes in curiosity.  Didn’t see those around often, but she could fix it.  As long as the pilot was good for it, of course.

Her droids rolled up, ready to help, and she strolled out of her office with her cup of hot caf in hand.  She blew on it idly as the ship set down on its landing gear, which had seen better days.  She could already spot six areas that needed repair, always a bad sign.  

The more she looked, the more she saw.   The ship itself bore marked signs of carbon scoring and was missing several panels and outer arrays. One of the gun turrets had been taken out entirely.  Poor flying, it looked like, but it made for good credits.  She could get a solid day or two of work out of it, easy. 

She waited, growing increasingly annoyed at the amount of time it was taking for the pilot to hurry up and step outside.  Her caf was growing cold in her hands in the chilly winter breeze, and she frowned.  “Coming out or what?” she hollered, perfectly aware that the pilot wouldn’t be able to hear her unless they opened the ship up.  Still, though, it made her feel like she was doing something.  One of her droids burbled to her curiously, and she shrugged.

After what seemed an eternity, the ramp dropped to the sand.  She watched the darkness within the ship curiously, peering up into its belly as the pilot descended the ramp.  Those boots -- it couldn’t be --  A grin stretched across her face.

“Mando!” she crowed.  “Moving up in the world!  Finally put that hunk of junk of yours to rest, did you?”

The Mandalorian stepped out of the cargo bay, each footstep on the ramp measured and slow.  He walked down to her level.  “The Crest had a good run,” he said, as humorless as ever.

“Well, what happened to her?  You didn’t blow up running sublight, anyway, or you’d be space dust,” Peli laughed, taking a sip of her caf.  Ah, hell.  She’d forgotten it had gone cold.  She slugged down the rest, her mouth twitching at the bitterness.  She leaned sideways, looking around the back of him for the strap of the bag he wore to carry the kid.  But he wasn’t wearing it.

“An Imperial light cruiser happened,” he said.  “The X4’s serviceable enough.  But it’s going to need some work.”

“A light cruiser?” Peli asked in disbelief.  “That would have blown your rusty tin can to bits.”

He shifted slightly, rested his hands on his hips.  “It did.”

“Hang on, hang on.”  She handed her cup to one of the droids, who trotted off with it for cleaning.  She stared at the Mandalorian, spreading her hands out wide.  “Let’s get one thing straight.  Where’s my little guy?”

Mando stared at her, or maybe he didn’t.  The helmet was impossible to read.  But his shoulders rose and fell.  Rose, and fell.

She knew what an Imperial light cruiser could do.   Knew it could take down a whole town from above, let alone a little ship.  Let alone a little ship holding a defenseless child --

“Mando, come on,” she wheedled, trying to keep her tone light despite a growing sense of dread.  “You’re scaring me here.  Where is he?” 

“He’s safe now,” said Mando at last, and even through the helmet his voice sounded wrong.  Peli felt a chill that had nothing to do with the cool winter breeze.

“What do you mean?” she said sharply.  “I don’t like how that sounds, I don’t like it at all.  Sounds kinda final to me.”

“He’s with his own kind now,” said Mando, and his shoulders sank.  He looked at his hands, flexed them as if he didn’t recognize them.  “I found him a --”  His voice hitched.  He tried again.  “I found him a -- a Jedi --”  

She heard it, then, the strain.  That rough wetness to the voice.  The Mandalorian was crying.

Tears sprang to her eyes.  “Ohhhh, shit shit shit, Mando.”  She hurried over to him, grabbed the great silver lump by his shoulders, and steered him into her office.  He went without protest, his vocoder still relaying breathing that was too ragged and irregular to be normal.  Well, if this wasn’t a womp rat in the water tank.  

She fought back her own disappointment, her face twisting as she shoved him into one of the chairs.  She took the other, resting her face in her hand, and gaped at him.

“When did this happen?”

His helmet stared past her at the wall.  He took a deep breath, and the weepy sounds were gone.  “A few weeks ago,” he said, and his voice was all flatness, all emptiness.  

She shook her head.  “I mean, I know you said you were gonna -- but I thought that was just talk.”

“Why would it just be talk?” he asked, straightening up in his chair, stiff as anything.  “I was quested --”

“For suns’ sake, I thought you were just being religious or something!  A figure of speech!” said Peli.  “I never thought you’d really send him away.  You were crazy about him!”

The helmet tilted toward her in a faint nod.  “Yeah.”

Peli rubbed her face, trying to square what he was telling her now with the way he carried that little kid halfway across the Dune Sea, strapped to his hip, precious as anything.  She let out a long breath through her nose, thinking.

“So wait.  The kid was a Jedi?”

“He had… powers.  He needed training I couldn’t give him.”  This part came out all rote, like he’d said it a hundred times.

“But he had to leave you for that?  Like, you still get to see him now and then, right?  He’s not gone forever -- oh no, I’m sorry, oh, hell.”  He wasn’t crying this time, or if he was, it was harder to tell -- but he’d twisted his helmet hard to the side as if she’d punched him straight through his fancy armor, and he’d tensed in a way that had nothing to do with being battle-ready.  She froze, waiting for him to respond.

“I don’t think I’ll ever see him again,” he mumbled, bowing his head over his chest.  His hands unfurled in his lap, palms facing upward like they’d never hold a weapon again.

Damn it.  Peli scrubbed her burning eyes, hard, with the sleeve of her jacket.  They sat in silence for several minutes, Peli for once at a loss for words.  

There was a small noise by the door.  She glanced at it out of habit, startling when she realized it was one of the boys with her evening meal. She’d forgotten she’d set the droids on dinner duty tonight, not wanting to bother with it herself.  She blinked away the stinging in her eyes and turned to the Mandalorian, slumped in the chair.

“Hey.  You.”

He lifted the helmet slightly, enough so she could tell he heard her.

“When’s the last time you ate anything?”

He tilted his head upward to look at her, pausing as if in thought.  “Yesterday?  …day before yesterday.”

“Well, damn it, here you go.” She grabbed the tray from her droid and shoved the platter of food into the Mandalorian’s lap.  He looked down at bantha cheese, sorghum bread and dewback jerky with apparent bemusement.

“I — shouldn’t—“

Oh, right.  He was one of those that never showed his face, she remembered.  She firmly turned her chair around and closed her eyes, shooing her droid away with one hand.  She heard the droid go and reached, eyes still closed, to shut her office door. 

“I ain’t looking,” she declared.  “But you need to eat, and if you wanna talk while doing it, that’s fine too.  I got more things to worry about than what one Mandalorian looks like under his helmet, you know.”

A few beats passed.  She wasn’t sure what he would say, but the fact he hadn’t outright insisted she take her dewback jerky and screw off was probably a good sign.

“You swear it?” he asked cautiously.

“I do.  Cross my heart and hope to fall in a sarlacc pit.  But honest, if it makes you uncomfortable, I’ll go out to the yard, or you can get back on your ship —“

There was a hissing sound and a faint snick.  “No.  It’s all right.”  The words were followed by the sounds of eating and swallowing.  Something in her relaxed slightly, hearing it.

Peli leaned back in her chair, resolutely keeping her eyes closed.  Customers had a million weird requests and this was an easy one, especially since a well-fed customer always paid better.  

Besides, Mando wasn’t just a typical customer anymore.  Somewhere in there between repeat business and the shared affection they had for the child, he’d become a… a friend.  And Peli knew how to deal with those.

She settled her head in against the chair’s back and crossed her arms.  “So,” she said baldly, “I take it you’re not exactly doing great.”

He snorted.  Huh, he could laugh.  “That’s presumptuous,” he said, and without the ominous filter of the helmet, his voice was just a man’s voice, a little low, a little rough.  There was a pause.  “No.  I guess not.”

“It’s not something people just get over, losing a kid.”  She waved a hand up over the back of her chair in what she assumed was still his general direction.  “And I know, maybe you’ll say he wasn’t really your kid —“

“No,” he said suddenly, the word fierce.  “He was.”  He sounded raw, vulnerable.  Human.

Peli nodded, her heart aching.  She liked that he was admitting it.  He’d always been cagey about that before, when Peli would tease him about his strange-looking kid and he’d mulishly push back, spouting off crap about the kid being a foundling, yadda yadda.  But it had been obvious to her on their visits it was more than that.  The kid wasn’t a foundling, he was his foundling.

“So then, he’s your kid,” she continued.  She waved one hand where he could see it, underscoring her words.  “And losing him… it hurts, right?  Some horrible dark hole you can’t climb out of.  Can’t see the suns from.  It sticks with you, through everything you do.”  She sighed.  “It does get… softer, eventually.  The dark sticks to the corners again.  But it’s still awful.  If you weren’t a mess about it I wouldn’t like you so much.”

She could hear him breathing hard behind her.  She waited.  “You’ve been through it yourself,” he said, realizing.

“Something like that.  Not exactly the same.”  She shrugged, broadly enough that she thought he could probably see it even with the chair back in the way.  With her eyes closed it was easy to see their faces as they had been.  Her younger sister Prida, gleefully loudmouthed and brassy; her beautiful nephew Nedhi with his chubby cheeks and bright eyes. “But let’s just say you don’t get to be my age on a world like this without losing people.”

“No.  I guess not.  I’m sorry.”  

“It’s okay,” said Peli, though it never would be, not really.  But she’d done her work on the dark, hard kriffing work, and she didn’t want him feeling like he had to suddenly stop being a mess and focus on helping her.  This wasn’t about that.  “It was a long time ago.  You don’t move on, really, but you move forward.”

She heard a faint click.  “You can turn around now,” he said.  “Thank you for your kindness.”

“That’s me, Peli Motto, kindness expert,” she said loftily.

A faint sound that might have been something like a laugh shifted into a serious tone.  “I haven’t shared a meal with anyone in -- not since Grogu.”  The last word came out nearly as quiet as a whisper, but she caught it anyway.  It sounded like a name.

She turned back around, opening her eyes and squinting at the sudden brightness.  Mando’s helmet, back in place, gleamed in the fading sunlight streaming through the window.  “What’s a Grogu?” she asked curiously.

“It’s the kid’s real name.  I only found out recently.”  He rested a hand on his belt, fingers tightening over one of the pouches.  “You should have seen the way he smiled, hearing it again --”  His voice had gone warm again, taking that tone he always used when talking to the kid.  

Peli grinned at him, picturing the kid’s strange face all sunny, his long ears tipping upward.  Grogu.  It fit him in a strange way, a weird homely name for a weird homely baby: just like how the bright little baby seemed to fit so well with the grim Mandalorian.  This was good.  This was progress.

But Mando caught himself, the warmth shutting off abruptly.  “I’m sorry.  I shouldn’t talk about this.  You have other things to do, and you’ve already done more than you needed.  And I should —“

“You should what?” Peli asked.  “Go back and mope alone on your new ship?  Something tells me you’ve already done more than enough of that, Mr. I Haven’t Eaten in Two Days.”

“You have no right --” he began, half-rising out of his chair as if to leave.

“No right to what?” she snapped, annoyed now.  “Point out when you’re gonna get yourself killed?  Don’t think I haven’t seen the state of that ship.  I know you’re a better pilot than that, you had to be to survive in the junk you were flying before.  If you’d taken any halfway decent evasive maneuvers it’d be in much better shape.  You’re flying sloppy,” she accused, and he sank back into the chair.

“And if I am?” he said, and the hollowness rolled off of him in waves.

Peli got to her feet, pacing around with one hand anchored to her hip, the other flying around to make her point.  Tough guys!  There was no end to their obnoxiousness.  “Look.  This is grief, Mando, and that’s the kind of shit that hunts you down and takes you out if you don’t face it.  You’re not special.  It’ll get you.  But I think you’re good people, and I like having you as a customer, and I’m selfish.  I’d like to keep you around instead of hearing you got yourself blown up.”

He lowered his head, listening.  

“So here’s Peli’s take on the situation.  I think you wanna talk about him, and about what you’re going through.”  She raised her brows.  “And I think you should.  I really think you should.”

He was silent for a few moments.  She paced.

“And you’re the one to talk to, huh?” he asked.

“Unless you’re hiding somebody else on that ship.”

He chuckled, a dry, raspy sound.  “Only in carbonite.  But they’re not very good listeners.”

“Well, look who’s a funny guy!” Peli cackled.  “Come on.  I’ll get the droids started on repairing your ship.  Let’s go up to the roof and take some time.  Night’s nice, this time of year.”

“Fine,” he said, in utter resignation.

***

They sat on empty shipping containers on the rooftop where the breeze was best, watching the moons rise as the last flare of the setting suns washed across the horizon.  The first star of the evening shone silvery white against the dusk.

Mando sat, shoulders straight and head high, on his crate; Peli slouched comfortably on hers.  A thermos of hot chocolate sat beside her, a treat she liked to save for particularly profitable days.  And for rough ones, too.  It was still a little too hot to drink, and she waited, trying to be patient despite it not being one of her strong suits.

“Well, Mando?” she asked.

“What do you want me to say?” he replied. 

“I dunno.  Tell me something about the kid.  Something that made you happy about him.  Or sad.  Come on, they’re your emotions,” said Peli.  “Ahh, I suppose I should go easy on you.  You don’t strike me as the conversational type.”

Another one of those dry chuckles.  “I’m not.  But I talked to him a lot.”

“Sure.  It’s good for kids.  Gotta mold those growing brains and all.  What’d you talk to him about?  Bounty hunting?”

“Not exactly,” said the Mandalorian.  He angled his head to one side, considering.  “I would always give him some idea of what we were doing, where we were going, who we were going to see.  He seemed to like hearing about it, like it was a story.”

“Did you ever tell him any bedtime stories?” asked Peli.  “He liked those, you know.”

He turned to her, folding his arms across his chest.  “What do you mean?”

“How d’you think I got him to sleep, that first time you two showed up?  You were off in the Dune Sea with that idiot hunter kid, and I had to figure out how to get the little guy to get some sleep, otherwise he would have eaten me out of house and home,” laughed Peli.  “So I told him all the stories I used to tell my nephew Nedhi.  The lost little bantha, the happy Jawa, the baby krayt dragon all alone in the desert.  You know.  The classics.”

“I’m sure he enjoyed them,” said Mando.  “I didn’t really know any stories.”  He shifted awkwardly on his crate.  “I tried to make up a few, but it’s not exactly my forte.”

“Well, he did like the stories, but I think he liked them too well.  Kept trying to act out the dance of the happy Jawa instead of going to sleep.  Nah, he didn’t get tired until I tried singing a lullaby to him.  You do not want to hear me sing, but I guess it worked.  Kids have weird taste,” said Peli, shaking her head.  She checked the display on her thermos and saw the temperature had settled at the perfect warmth for drinking.  “Hey, you want some hot chocolate?  Mixed it special.  I might have added a few nips of Rylothian firewhiskey; really gives it a kick.”

“Maybe later,” said Mando gruffly.  

“Your loss,” said Peli, pouring out a little cup for herself.  She blew on the surface, then took a sip, feeling warmth suffuse her from the top of her head to her toes.  She whistled.  “It’s a good batch.  Lemme know if you change your mind.”

The last daylight vanished, leaving a sky painted in inky blues and purples.  The nascent moons crept shyly above the horizon as the starfield began to populate in earnest, points of flickering gold and white amid the darkness.  

“What was his favorite food?” Peli asked. 

The Mandalorian guffawed, throwing his head back.   “He ate everything.  You know he almost got us all killed on that transport trip with your Frog friend?”

“What?” Peli squawked.  “I heard back from her later.  Sent me a holo of her cute little tadpoles and told me you’d kept your word like a true Mandalorian.  She didn’t mention a word about death-defying experiences.”

“We crashed on a glacial world trying to shake a New Republic patrol,” said Mando.  “I was busy repairing the ship when she wandered off and found a hot spring.  She was trying to keep her eggs warm and I was trying to keep them safe from --  well, Grogu found these spider eggs and started eating them.  Turns out ice spiders come in a lot of different sizes.”  He groaned.  “The biggest one was the size of the Crest.  If I never see another ice spider, it’ll be too soon.”

“Oh, no,” Peli lamented.  “Well, tell me you weren’t too hard on him.  He couldn’t have known what he was doing.  He was just hungry!”

“Don’t worry.  He didn’t get in trouble.  It wasn’t his fault,” said Mando.  He lay back on the crate, lacing his fingers together over his waist and letting his legs hang free.  “I should have kept a better watch on him.”  He turned his helmet to look at her.  “You were right.”

“About what?” asked Peli, taking another sip of chocolate.  It burned sweetly on the way down, and she closed her eyes, savoring it.  The warmth was a delicious contrast to the cool night wind.  “Besides everything.”

“The first time we met.  You told me I had a lot to learn about caring for a young one.”

She cast her mind back to her first meeting, remembering how Grogu had sleepily walked out of the ship, looking around in disappointed confusion for his beskar-clad caretaker.  She’d seen a lot of shoddy childcare in Mos Eisley, but leaving a toddler alone on a gunship definitely ranked up there with questionable parenting practices.  It was a move made either by someone foolish or desperate, and she knew which one Mando wasn’t.

“Yeah, well, you probably didn’t have a lot of options,” said Peli gently.  “Raising a kid, it’s hard work.  I tried to help my sister Prida as much as I could.  My nephew was always getting into things and making a nuisance of himself, so I watched him a lot when she had to work.  He was always messing around with my tools and getting underfoot; used to tell my sister I’d rather adopt a Kowakian monkey-lizard than have to deal with his shenanigans.”  She smiled fondly.  

“Did your nephew grow out of it?” asked Mando.  “I kept hoping Grogu would start listening to me for once, but he was stubborn.”  

Peli shook her head, swallowing.  She looked away from him, staring off into the darkened desert, shivering slightly in the wind.  “Never got to find out.  The Hutts charged a lot for protection.  I didn’t even know Prida was in debt until…”  She sighed.  “I came home with dinner and found them both.  There had been a struggle, but not a very long one.”

“I’m sorry,” said Mando, sitting back up.  His shoulders shifted, the angle between them softening.  

“It’s never the same for anybody,” said Peli.  “Grief, I mean.  I don’t know exactly what you’re going through.  But I think the shape of it’s kind of the same, even if the name is different.  Son.  Nephew.  Sister.  It’s all hard.”  She finished her chocolate and reached for the thermos.  More firewhiskey sounded good, right about now.  “Sure you don’t want some, Mando?”

He hesitated, then reached out an orange-gloved hand.  

“That’s the spirit,” said Peli.  She filled her own cup, then filled the second one for him and passed it over.  She held hers up and clinked it against his.  “Cheers.”

“Cheers,” he said cautiously.  She turned away, keeping her gaze on the distant mountains, just the merest black line on the darkened horizon.  The stars spangled the heavens, little jewels in gold and white.  Behind her, the Mandalorian was apparently investigating his drink.  She heard the click and hiss of his helmet raising and lowering as he drank, then a hacking sputter.

“You all right there?” she asked, resisting the urge to look at him in case she saw under the helmet.  

He gulped audibly.  “It’s been a while since I had firewhiskey,” he said, his voice unmechanized.  She heard him swallow again, this time without the sputter.  “This is good, though.  I haven’t had hot chocolate in years.”

“Even the packaged stuff?” Peli asked.  “Aw, come on.  You gotta treat yourself sometimes, Mando.”

“Treating myself usually means picking up a new weapon,” he said drily.  “Grogu would have liked this, though.  Without the firewhiskey.”

“Of course, of course.”

She sipped her chocolate.  In the distance, a lonely krayt dragon howled, just like in the stories.  It was a faint, pithy sound, but the empty sands carried the cry clearly, and it washed over them like the breeze.  She and Prida used to cower at the sound when they were children.  Now, it simply sounded like home.

“So how are you really?” asked Peli.  She’d never seen much point in subtlety.

“I don’t sleep well,” he said reluctantly.  

“Sounds about right.  It takes a toll,” said Peli.  “Hurt like this messes with you.  I remember I couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, couldn’t do anything.  It took weeks, maybe months, before I could sleep again.”

“Grogu used to wake me up most nights, talking to himself or crying or getting into things.  I… didn’t mind that,” he mused.  “But now he’s gone.  And I still can’t sleep.”

“Dreams?”

She heard the click of his helmet settling back into place.  “Yes.”

“Bad ones?”

A long, tense pause.  When he spoke again, his voice shook.  “Yes.”

She turned back to face him, taking another drink, letting the warmth of the chocolate fill her mouth and chest.  She remembered that time in a blurry, confused way, broken nights marked by imagining how that fight must have gone.  Dreams where she thought they’d died quickly, or dreams where they lasted for a while, suffering, on the floor of their cramped grimy kitchen.  She didn’t know which she hated more.

“I’m sorry,” she said.  She looked down at her hands, calloused and wrinkled, a lifetime of hard work etched into them.  But they hadn’t been enough to undo what had been done.  

“He almost died,” said Mando roughly, glancing away from her.  Moonlight and starlight pooled and rippled over his armor.  “The Imps took him.  They were taking his blood, doing tests on him.  Experiments.  If I hadn’t come for him -- if that Jedi hadn’t been so powerful...”  He sighed.  

“Shit,” whispered Peli.

HIs hands curled into fists.  “He was so pale when I found him.  They’d hurt him.  Badly.”  His legs, dangling over the edge of the crate, were trembling.  All of him was trembling.

A white-hot rage burned within her, a fury that made her slug back the rest of her chocolate and scowl.  “Are they still alive?  You need me to kill them for you?”

He laughed a little, the sound cracking partway through.  The trembling faded.  “They’re all either dead or the New Republic’s problem now.  But… thank you.”

“How could anyone hurt a hair on his head?” growled Peli.  “You’re sure he’ll be safe with this Jedi?”

“The Jedi fought like nothing I’ve ever seen,” said Mando.  “And he promised he would lay down his life for the kid.  I have to believe it’s enough.  I did what I set out to do.  It just….”  He rolled the little cup of hot chocolate around in his hand, then raised his other hand to lift the helmet.  Peli closed her eyes until she could hear the helmet drop back down.

“It must have been so hard,” said Peli.  “Letting him go like that.”

Mando set the cup down beside him and rested his hands on his thighs, the fingers flexing and uncurling.  “I let him see me.”

“Huh?  You’re hard to miss, you know --” Peli began, then realized.  “You mean your face?”

A slight nod, the helmet dipping towards her and lifting back up.  “I… broke the Creed.”  The words hung heavy in the air between them.  “I don’t regret it.  He wanted to see me.  And… I wanted to be seen.”  His voice dropped, low and hoarse.  “I promised him I would see him again.  But I don’t know that I will, and I --  I wanted him to remember my face.”

Peli gaped at him, horrified.  “So let me get this straight.  You lost your boy.  And your ship.  And your creed?  Just since the last time I saw you?”

He was quiet.

“Dank farrik, Mando!” she bellowed.  A flock of lesser nightwings roosting on the roof took flight, scattering in the moonlight at the sound.  “Look.  You can dock here as long as you need, all right?”

He shook his head.  “People are hunting me.  What else is new?”

Peli frowned.  “Fair enough.”  The guy really didn’t seem to be able to catch a break.  “Don’t want to put you at risk, in case you do get to see him again.  And I’ll be pulling for you on that, believe you me.  We’ll get you out of here, quick as we can.”

“I appreciate it.”

“You know, I figured out what it is,” said Peli.  “What got me.  You and Grogu remind me so much of Prida and Nedhi -- the two of you against the world.”  Her mouth quirked up to one side in a half-smile.  “Just don’t forget to visit old Peli if you get him back, you hear?”  

“Sure.  Maybe you can teach me some of those bedtime stories for him,” said Mando.  “For -- for the future.”

“Absolutely.”  She kicked her heels against her crate, rapping an aimless pattern as she did so.  The firewhiskey was starting to kick in a little, and she made a decision.  “Look… just so you know, repairs on your ship are on me this time.”

“No,” he said sternly.  “Full price.  Plus extra for the food and the chocolate.”

“No,” Peli insisted.  He was an obstinate one, that was for sure.  She could see where the kid got it from.  “Fine.  Half price.  You overpaid me the first time, remember?”

He let out an annoyed grunt.  “Three quarters.”

“Deal,” she said, smirking.  “You’re something else, Mandalorian.”

He seemed to be thinking hard about something, though it was difficult to tell with the helmet.  Eventually he said, “Din.”

“Eh?”

“My name is Din Djarin,” he said.  

She blinked.  “It’s a good name,” she said lamely.  Huh.  She hadn’t expected that.  But then again, maybe Mando didn’t sit on him as easily as it used to.  The thought made her sad, the feeling mingled with a sense of something like honor, what with him sharing this with her.  She suspected it was something he had done very few times before.

“All right, Din,” she said, trying it out.  It felt heavy, and strange, but right.  “Don’t worry.  I won’t spread it around.”

“Thanks.”

She glanced at her chrono, realizing how long they’d been up on the roof.  “Well, I guess I’d better check on how the droids are getting on with your ship, since you’ll need to get going.”

“I... have a little time,” Din said slowly, glancing at her.  “Got any more of that chocolate?”

She grinned at him, heartened.  “For a friend?  Yeah.  Of course I do.”  She reached for his cup and refilled them both with the last of the spiked hot chocolate. She passed him his cup and he held it up for a toast.  

Peli hesitated, then smiled softly.  “To those we carry with us.”  Her cup clinked against his, a bright and hopeful sound.

“To those we carry with us,” Din echoed, and the mingled grief and gratitude in his voice cut her to the core.  

The moons above them glowed in soft whites and yellows against the endless sky, and the stars wheeled.  Below them, Mos Eisley lived and hummed and moved on, its citizens striving, searching, seeking.  The mechanic and the man in armor sat on the roof under the stars and moons, enjoying the taste of hot chocolate and firewhiskey in the cool winter air, and for at least a little while, they did not fear the dark.

***********

(Bonus: a doodle I did of their initial meeting.)

[sugarydolli]

The Broken Elevator | [Soft]

Title - The Broken Elevator

Word Count - 1.9k

Pairings - Keigo Takami (Hawks) x Fem!Reader

Warnings - Break up, claustrophobia (your stuck in an elevator), Near-Death experience, Bad day?

My teacher had to read this yo.. 😰

Sorry if it's a bit blocky or weird from my normal writing style, I couldn't write it the way I wanted cause it was for school..but please enjoy 😊. Also your locked in an elevator so if that makes you uncomfy please don't read.

-

Sadly, Your day was already going south before the incident. Your car broke down on your way to work, you just realized that you put your skirt on backwards, and to put the icing on the cake a clumsy co-worker spilled hot coffee onto your new white blazer. “It's fine.” you told yourself as you walked over to the women’s bathroom before getting interrupted by the janitor. “Sorry miss,” he stood in front of the door rubbing the back of his neck. “All the bathrooms are clogged..except for the ones downstairs.” You sighed walking over to the elevator.

Reaching over to press the down button on the contraption, you hesitated. Worry filled your body, remembering all the tales you overheard your Co-workers said about it. According to them, the elevator was cursed breaking down for hours causing phobias and fears to shine through. You looked down at your shirt debating between taking the 10 flights of stairs that would for sure leave your feet swollen or the appearently cursed elevator.

Stupidly thinking your coffee stained shirt was worse than getting stuck on a elevator. Pushing down the fear bubbling in your tummy, you boarded the elevator testing your luck. Quickly pressing the button for the first floor, you waited patiently for it start. Once the sound of the elevator descending started you began to relax and the tension in the air faded. Finally hearing the ding when you reached your destinated floor you rushed over to the bathroom to clean yourself up.

After you finished cleaning up, the feeling of accomplishment waved over you for something going right today. Having no fear towards the elevator, you decide to ride again and finally start off your day on the right foot. A smile slowly spread across your delicate face as you closed your eyes and waited for the elevator to slowly ascend as it closed its doors. Until a flash of red wisped past the small creak in the door causing the doors to automatically open again. You quickly open your eyes to see your ex, Keigo, stumble through the door. Nevermind, this was officially the worst day of your life.

“Heh..Sorry-” his bright amber eyes looked up to see nothing but disgust in yours. Hawks awkwardly straightened himself out and shuffled next to you taking occasional glances. Small glimpses of your break up started to play in your mind as you stood, clouding your mind. Your tears, him walking out, the gossip among your co-workers, it was all coming back to you so suddenly it brought fresh tears to collect in on your waterline. Hawks looked down, regret stinging his face remembering the events from a few months ago.

Trapped in your thoughts you didn't notice the elevator’s sluggish pace, the machine starting to softly rattle before turning into a violent shake startling the both of you. You could hear some creaks and screeches before it proceeded to start plummeting down, a shriek escaped your mouth as large arms came around your frame and cradled you. Without thinking you held on to whatever, too scared to even open your eyes, The elevator halted right before the ground and shook once more then slowly stopping.

After a few minutes, you shifted causing Hawks to jump off you, looking away while scratching his head. Looking around at the now blinking lights you could see a panel of numbers, scooting over to them you pressed the red emergency button. The button gave a distorted ding till it completely shut down. Your next plan was your phone, moving around in your one spot to at least gain one bar of service but after a while of trying you admitted defeat.

Begrudgingly turning your head over to Keigo who was fiddling with his wings with a small blush casted onto his fair face. “We’re stuck.” you announce, slumping back onto the wall. Grief washing over you as you realized your situation. You trapped with your ex in an elevator for who knows how long. Your day went from bad to worse within minutes.

It’s been up to two hours now and it's been quiet with small talk here and there. You played on your phone for the first thirty minutes until it got down to fifteen percent, deciding it would be best if you save the battery. “Do..do you still think about...us?” Keigo asked in a meek tone than his usually laidback one. Taking a moment to respond you sighed, looking at the blonde male. “Why would I, Keigo? Why would I want to relive heartbreak over again?” He looked down, shame casted onto his face. Hawks stayed quiet for a while as you sulked in your corner.

Tears slid silently down your plush cheeks thinking about the events of your break up. “I cant do this anymore, Dove.” he whispered under his breath causing you to stop in your tracks. Keigo got up from the small chair and slid his coat on, “I'm sorry I just don't feel it anymore.” He walked out the door leaving you standing there. It took awhile to process before your knees buckled and you slowly slid down to the ground feeling as if a piece of you died that day. “If that's the case, Yes. I think about ‘us’ everyday.”

A solid hour and a half passed by and there was still silence among you two. Keigo tried to speak up multiple times but as soon as he opened his mouth it was as if the words would just disappear. You didn't move from your corner of the elevator, baskin in your sorrow and regret. Slowly though, the sorrow you felt for yourself turned into spite as time passed. Finally managing to get the words out, Keigo turned to you seeing your red eyes and tear stained cheeks. “Sorry Dove..” looking down before he continued but quickly you cut him off. “Sorry Keigo? Sorry? You think a simple apology is gonna make me feel better after months of pain? Having to listen to my co-workers gossip about how you were on some girl at the club literally DAYS after? You think a ‘Sorry’ is gonna fix it all?”

Keigo silently leaned back into the wall as you turned directly towards him and shouted. You could see regret fill his face as you went on and tears gathered up in his golden eyes which were now starting to fall. To caught up in your rant you didn't hear the elevator springs start to pop from your rapid movements, causing you to yelp a bit. Without saying another word you went back to pouting unable to meet his sorry gaze. Keigo came for his things he left at your apartment a month after he walked out, you sat on your couch in silence waiting for him to finish packing. Once he was gone you completely broke down, letting out whimpers and sobs. What happened? In the many years of your relationship Keigo never gave off that he was unhappy. You realizing it was time to move on, so you distracted yourself with work but nevertheless you still thought about him.

At this point it's been 6 hours in this closed space. But the amount of emotions going through both of you made it feel like years in this trapped space. Keigo silently weeped in his designated corner, he felt like apologizing a million times wanting to explain himself as you sat there emotionless. “I didn't wanna leave you..” he whispered gently under his breath. “Then why did you?” you didn't have the energy to look at him. Keigo gave a long sigh, feeling water build up in his eyes once again. “I didn't mean to hurt you, I just…” He paused bringing a hand to wipe his tears. “Days before, the commission found out about us..and I..I couldn't risk it,” Keigo turns to you. “I'm so sorry, Dove..”

You let a few tears slip before rotating to face him, Keigo scoots closure to you from his corner. “Why didn't you tell me?” you muttered leaning slightly. “I didn't know how to explain it..” he ran a hand through his golden locks. The elevator creaked, falling slightly causing you both to jump. You scooted a bit closer to Keigo to where you both were only a space apart still trying to take in his explanation for hurting you all those months ago. Three more hours passed making it now nine hours you’ve been trapped. In order to avoid eerie silence the two of you started to talk normally. It didn't take long before Keigo's silly nature to kick in resulting in your first genuine smile of the day.

He could feel his cheeks burning from your smile, a warm feeling filled his stomach. Without thinking he reached over and stroked the side of your face, “I still love you..Dove” Your laughter quickly died down as your face reddened. Mouth agape as you processed all the emotions at once, You went into this elevator feeling nothing but disgust and revulsion but now your heart was almost pounding out of your chest. As much as you wanted to tell yourself it was good to move on, you always knew you couldn't get over Keigo. “I-..” you looked deep into his waiting eyes, opening your mouth to respond to his confession. Suddenly, the floor beneath you shook then soon everything was starting to vibrate.

Keigo wrapped his arms around your small frame once again as you clinged to his chest. Wires started snapping from above and screeches could be heard from the walls. The room stopped vibrating for a bit allowing you guys to look around before everything started to sink. Metal scraping against each other making a horrible sound, Keigo pulled you tighter against him, tears filled your eyes starting to believe these were your last moments. Quickly making up your mind you look at him deeply, through your tears. “I love you, Keigo” you say as you tightly closed your eyes and braced yourself for impact.

Fortunately, impact never came. A small shake followed by the feeling of sinking in your stomach stopping caused you to open your eyes. The blinking light was back to its original state and the elevator dinged, opening its doors. People passed by the scene giving weird looks and stares while you both rushed out the door. Running up to the front desk, the two of you tried to make sense of what just happened. “The elevator broke down! We were in there for HOURS!” You shouted, not caring if you were slowly ruining your job reputation, Keigo also gave his side of the experience.

The assistant looked at you both questioningly then shook her head and laughed before explaining what happened. You both walked out the building in embarrassment, according to the assistant the elevator worked perfectly fine and the both of you she assumed were putting on a show. She did allow you to leave for the day and Hawks followed. “Hey..” Keigo turned to you. “I know at the time we were kinda in the middle of falling through an elevator in a dream but..” you giggled looking up at him. “If your trying to ask if I meant it, yes I do..I love you Keigo.” His amber eyes lit up, he placed his hands on your waist and pulled you forward. You leaned in to him and softly pressed your plush lips against his, Keigo’s heart swelled no longer feeling empty.

-

You and Keigo: *Dramatic getting back together love story*

Everyone else in the elevator:

[razorblade180]

Rosebud Prologue:The first move.

In times of despair and sorrow there are fundamentally two options. Wallow in it, or move forward despite through the pain. A wise person would recommend escaping one’s own personal suffering. A wiser man would ask the question nobody else does. When you move forward, what happens to things left behind? They don’t fade away, not always. Sometimes...they try to keep up.

It was just another day. Ruby was doing dishes while her fourteen year old daughter, Carmine, held her baby brother in her arms. The little monster was enjoying his bottle while his happy sister hummed Gold to him. Ruby couldn’t help but feel all warm inside. Carmine had been doing everything and more to help out. This past year could’ve been way harder without her, but now things had fallen into a decent routine. More importantly, Ruby could say goodbye to sweatpants again and hello to corsets! Her body was back in action like it was before pregnancy. Loving her children had no limits but it felt heavenly to not feel like a balloon again. Jaune never complained though. Most likely because it meant it was his turn to whip her into shape. The sneaky husband loved helping with her stretches.

Ruby put away the last dish and dried her hands. “Wanna switch off?” She asked, clearly seeing Carmine enjoy her current duty. The girl shook her head no. “I’m fine feeding Garnet. Just another role as big sis!” Her smile practically reached her eyes. Ruby noticed Carmine had her red contacts in. “Going somewhere soon?

“Yep. When dad gets back with groceries I’m gonna head out to do a bit of patrolling. Thought I’d stop by Sun’s place and see if Aero wanted to join. He gets snippy if I don’t at least try and convince him to join.” Ruby laughed, that was pretty on brand for the boy. “Just don’t go around town starting trouble. I’m tired of the cops telling me you’re playing vigilante.” Carmine couldn’t help scoff at such exaggerated claims. “How’s it my fault I happened to encounter a gang leader in his hidden base of operations? It was poorly hidden. Besides, the cops haven’t called in weeks.”

Ruby’s scroll immediately starts ringing with the Vacou police department ID on it. She turns to Carmine and sighs. “Listen, I was wild like this too, but not this wild.” Carmine raised an eyebrow. “But...I haven’t done anything. In a while, or that they can prove…” she hoped. Ruby only shook her head tiredly and answered. “What or who did Carmine break?” The officer laughed lightly before it faded off. “No no, this isn’t about Carmine. One of the stations a couple of miles out of the kingdom to the neighboring towns called our department. If I’m correct, you were very close with Maria Calavera, yes?” Ruby moved away from her kids and spoke lower. Maria had passed away several years ago. It was the first time Carmine looked so hurt. “Yes, is everything okay? Did something happen to her house,”

“Her home is fine, but not her tombstone. Apparently some punk kid decided to defile it. The cops are wondering if you can drop by and scare the punk into proper shape. You know how people get when they meet you. Also you take care and technically on it, so pressing charges have to come from you.” Ruby was still processing someone disrespecting a grave. To what gain? Maria had no more enemies. Not to mention that her grave wasn’t in a cemetery. It was moved to a hill near the outskirts. “Yeah I’ll show up. I can’t promise I won’t scare the kid to death though. I can’t believe a person did such a thing. This world I’ll tell ya; give me a few minutes to head out. Have them with me so they can admire their work before I make them clean it all up.” Ruby hung up and let out a sigh. There was always something.

“Everything okay?” Carmine asked. She walked towards her mother and held Garnet's adorably chubby face in front of Ruby’s face. It was impossible not to smile at it. “Hehe, I’m fine. Looks like a certain baby is fine too. I might have to put this boy on a diet!” She poked his tummy and patted Carmine’s head. “I gotta go to your abuela’s gravesite. Somebody was messing with it and I gotta give them a stern talking to.” Carmine looked as stunned as Ruby did, then her face scowled. Ruby had seen that before. “Nah ah, you can not come and beat them up.”

Carmine poked her lips out. “You’re no fun. I guess I’ll keep the house safe with Garnet then.” As if she had a choice. Who else was gonna do it!? She stopped pouting when Ruby kissed her forehead. Carmine wanted to rub it off but her hands were full. “Mom!” Ruby stuck her tongue out childishly as she walked away. “Lock the door! You dad will be home soon.” The front door was closed and the house became a little more quiet. “Well it’s just you and I now.” Garnet blinked his eye at her curiously before spitting up a little on himself. Carmine closes her eyes to collect herself. “You’re lucky you’re cute.”

xxxx

The trip to Esperanza from the outskirts of Vacou was only a couple miles; not a real problem for someone who walked all the way to Haven. Ruby reached Maria’s small and festive hometown in about half an hour. It was still rather early for everyone to be out and about but noise and smells of food sizzling filled the air all the same. Ruby always liked this place. She spotted the tree that stood proudly on the hill on the other side of the town. Even from here she could see some limbs had been broken off and some kind of fabric flowing off of it. “Why would-ugh, teenagers.” Ruby groaned. Under the tree she could see a cop and another individual draped in a black hood. Now she was even more confused. An over eager fan or hater maybe? Many people around here loved Maria and her legendary status. Ruby wasted no time racing up to the vandalism, catching the raven haired officer off guard. Her emerald eyes bugged out at the sudden appearance.

“Gah! Wow, you’re faster up close. You should come with a bell.” Ruby chuckled at the statement. “I bet the grimm would love that idea.” A closer look at the tree revealed more damaged limbs and roughed up ground. Ruby turned to the cloaked figure who avoided her gaze. They were taller than Ruby expected but that’s all she could decipher. “Care to explain why you felt so compelled to ruin a memorial? Disrespecting the dead is pretty low.” She said firmly, crossing her arms for more affect.

The person hid further in their hood. Ruby waited for any possible response but there was only silence. They looked at the ground and dug their right foot into the dirt. The cop touched Ruby soldier. “He’s been pretty silent since I caught him red handed. There’s a mark on the back of the tree they spray painted. I can’t make sense of it but I was hoping you might be able to. For all I know, no gangs use that tag.” Ruby pointed star the culprit. “Don’t you dare try to run. We’re not finished young man.” He nodded. Ruby backed away slowly. There were always a few that tried running. It was as if they forgot what her semblance was.

A few steps from her and the cop told her that the dude was just gonna stay there. She finally turned around to examine the tree. “You said the back right? Gangs spray paint all the time so I might not know what….” her voice drifted into silence as she reached the other side of the trees. She had to take a few steps back to make sure she was seeing things okay. “This-This is…” words still eluded her as Ruby stared at black spray paint that perfectly made the image of a queen chess piece. Ruby could feel her face lose its color. “Cinder…” it was as if her name was a trigger for disaster. The tree suddenly was cut into by a blade that pierced the other side. Ruby was barely able to dodge the surprise attack, getting a clear view of the weapon. It was a scythe. Their culprit was holding a standard scythe that counted swinging at her. A small smirk was visible on the young man’s face as he came at her in full force.

The scythe constantly spun in his hand as he tried to swipe Ruby.The woman was done being surprised however. Ruby easily ducked and whipped out Cresent Rose. “Wanna play huh? Fine.” She hissed. Fighting first and asking questions later was something Ruby could get behind. She gripped the pole of her weapon tight and swung horizontally. The force alone caused enough pressure to push her opponent back while the blade barely scratched his torso. He had good reflexes. Ruby blitzed behind him and slashed him back before disappearing and reappearing in front of him. Ruby spun the bottom of her scythe and clipped his chin, then took a shot to thrust it forward. The sharp metal end would’ve connected to his face if an unexpected bullet didn’t hit Ruby in her arm. She turns her head to see the cop’s gun trained on her with deadly accuracy.

“What the hell are you-huh?” The emerald eyes of the cop turned pink and brown along with her hair. A familiar mischievous laughter comes from the old adversary as she twirls the gun and watches Ruby avoid the opponent in front of her. “Hey Rubes! You’re looking good; filled out quite a bit. I know your husband must like that.” She fired a few more bullets at Ruby’s feet to keep her moving as the red reaper was easily out classing the man in black, but he was nothing but persistent. He forced Ruby to jump by sweeping her feet and shoulder bashed her to the ground. Expert or not, Ruby was only so big. She quickly recovered by tumbling backwards and dashed towards Neo. For the first time in a long time, an ache more deadly than any blade pierced Ruby’s heart. Ruby couldn’t help but be bombarded with the memories of seventeen years ago.

“WHERE IS SHE!?” Ruby screamed at the smirking woman. That smirk pissed her off to no end. Not again, they’re not taking anything again. She swung Crescent Rose downward at Neo’s face, but quickly spun it sideways to shoot herself towards the right. The cloaked figure sprinted in front of her and blocked a horizontal slash that looked like it would’ve hit air, but wouldn’t. The Neo behind her shattered and the real one poked her head out from behind the man, happily surprised. “Damn, nothing gets past you anymore huh? Saw right through me.” Neo tried getting off another shot. “Still fast?” One bullet fired at close range only hit a rose petal. Instincts told Neo to push her partner out the way and duck. It was the right call. The edge of a scythe blade had been dropped and yanked backwards where Neo’s neck was. “I’m faster…”

Neo’s partner swung the end of the shaft to Neo to grab a hold of then Yanked her to safety behind him. “Phew, thanks darling. Told you she was the real deal.” Neo finally stopped smiling and glared at Ruby. “That’s What makes this next part so satisfying.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out a detonator. Ruby’s body tensed up and her assault was halted. Neo’s thumb rubbed the top of the bottom rhythmically. “Guess where the bomb is?”

Ruby didn’t even flinch. “Leave the townspeople out of this or I swear-”

“Times up!” Neo hit the button and Ruby gasped. She went to dash at Neo but was hit in the side with a scythe from behind. The image in front of her shattered as she stumbled into it. An anger growl left her throat as Neo laughed. “Hahaha, kidding! This trigger does nothing.” She tossed it to the ground. “Still gullible after all these years. How are you not dead? Oh wait, others die for you.”

“Little…” Ruby grit her teeth and fired round after round at Neo. The cloaked man spun his scythe to deflect each one. He jumped forward with a downward slash but missed. Ruby spun in a tight vortex of petals that kept his feet fry the ground. She hooked his scythe with hers and yanked it out of his hands then hurled it Neo; not a shred of concern was seen as Neo leaned to the side and caught it. She turned to wink but saw Ruby behind her partner with the man on one knee and gripping the pole off Crescent Rose in an attempt to remove it from his neck before Ruby could choke him out. Neo pointed her pistol again but didn’t pull the trigger. With most of Ruby’s body behind his, it wouldn’t be a good idea to test her aim.

“Heroes take hostages now? That’s so cold”

“You would know.” Ruby pulled harder. “Must mean a lot to you if you’re not shooting. Where’s Cinder?”

“What? Am I not enough for you? Is my vengeance second rate? I thought you’d like me more after all we’ve been through.” Neo pouted.

“LAST CHANCE! OR-” Neo dropped the gun and yawned. “Or what? You’ll strangle him? That would be a terrible way to end a reunion, right Dustin?”

Just like that, Ruby felt her body go numb. “D-Dustin?” She muttered. Her grip accidentally loosened and the man ducked under the metal bar against his neck and rolled away in less than a second. The ground beneath Ruby trembled. Vines armed with thrones shot from the dirt and wrapped around her legs, waist, arms, and neck like barbed wire that pulled her down to her knees. The pain drained and felt a numbing, but Ruby could only stare at the black roses that bloomed on them slowly as the man walked towards Neo and grabbed his scythe. He looked back at Ruby who stared in disbelief, tears flooding her eyes. “D-Dustin…?” She repeated, her voice cracking. Ruby watched the man pull the hood off. Suddenly the world didn’t seem real. Her body felt ice cold with only the warmth of her tears on her face that came from silver eyes that became dim and cloudy; a perfect reflection of the ones in front her. Including the red and black hair. The difference being it was on a face that reflected not just her, but the man she married. It was only once, but Ruby never forgot that face. The face of the boy that made her a mother. The face she mourned for more times then she dared remember.

He finally spoke, “Hey mom. Glad you can make it.” The weight of cold and dense bone gripped Ruby’s shoulder. There wasn’t a nerve in her body that didn’t feel like fire and a heartbeat that didn’t sound like a boombox in her eardrums. If she was trembling before then she was now. Ruby didn’t even bother looking up. The shadow on the ground was enough. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world. It’s been quite some time since I met your mother in person. Isn’t that right?” The hand grabbed Ruby’s chin and turned it up to the right. Now Ruby had no choice but to look.

Cinder stood there looking down. Her previous outfit was ditched for dark purple leather pants and a black shirt that faintly glowed a deep fiery red like her heels. Not only was her arm different, looking fully formed and in case the bone armor grimm is known for, her eyes weren’t the same. One remained the same as before. The one that was never harmed. It was the injured one that made Ruby’s mouth run dry. The eye, it was silver as well. “Why don’t we catch up a bit? Normally I’m on a time crunch but since everyone is held up….” She turned Ruby’s head to the left and let her see what she had been missing out on. The wind around Vacou had picked up and turned a dust storm. In it, Ruby saw thousands of red eyes and the sign of fire. Alarm sirens blared seconds later.

“My gods…” Ruby gasped.

“Got to love subterranean grimm. Just have them move slow enough and a little magic to tip the weather in your advantage, then boom. Ambushed without a warning.” Cinder finally let her go sauntered over to Neo and Dustin. “Unfortunately it’s more smoke and mirrors than an actual bang. Tragedies on the scale of Beacon’s are hard to replicate. All you kids have grown up now and everywhere. It’s a pain in the ass. This event was just made to keep us uninterrupted.” Ruby tried struggling through the vines but could barely move. Every shift made her wince as they tightened. Not only that, but she actually felt weaker. They were doing more than restraining her. Cinder found amusement in the struggle. “Your son’s semblance is pretty annoying, isn’t it? Best not to move. Dustin, don’t over do it. I still want my fun.”

The pain eased and her strength was less inhibited. Ruby still couldn’t believe what was happening. She stared at her child who stared back, despondent. “Dustin, it’s me. I’m-”

He silenced her by tightening the single vine on her neck quickly. “I know exactly who you are.” Anger and vigor flooded his eyes in a glare that could only be seen as murderous. “And I have nothing to say to you.” Cinder rubbed his back. “Don’t mind him. You know how teens are, all rebellious and angry.” This situation was going so well she couldn’t help but laugh. “That being said, he’s grown into such a fine young man under my-”

“Ahem!” Neo said loudly. Cinder rolled her eyes and shrugged. “Under our guidance. He’s been quite helpful. Killing silver eyed people and learning their abilities has been far easier when he started helping out. It’s a shame, getting old that is. I used to go collecting by myself. Now he brings back the prizes for me sometimes.” Cinder rubbed the side of her face and saw Ruby shiver in shock. Their attention to each other was disrupted by a flashing light from Ruby’s pocket. The girl tried struggling again as Cinder reached for it and pulled out a scroll. Today got even surprisingly better all thanks to a home screen. “Oh well you look at that? Carmine was a person we expected to hear at least once, but I had no idea about the third one. What a handsome boy.”

Dustin’s body tensed tightly. “What…?” He muttered. Cinder tossed him the phone and sure enough, there the baby was with the rest of the family. Brand new silver eyes and all. The photo was blurred as Carmine’s name came up as the scroll rang. There was no hesitation in answering.

“Mom! Vacou’s being attacked and dad still isn’t back. Garnet is fine and no grimm are heading this way yet but-”

“CARMINE! TAKE YOUR BROTHER AND RUN!” Ruby screamed as loud as possible. Dustin hung up and looked at Cinder and she nodded. “Time for a family reunion.” She snapped her fingers and a nevermore descended from the sky for Dustin to jump on and head towards his brother and sister. Even with him gone, his vines still had a grasp on Ruby. It was weaker but the numbing pain still ran through her as she finally forced her way out of the ones around her arms and neck; air and sensation tried to fill her being again as she fell on her hands and knees. “My son, what did you do to him?” She raises her head with tears running down her face. Moving now would be stupid. Ruby had no choice but to recover.

“Me? You make it sound like I brainwashed him or abused him. No, no such thing.Granted it wasn’t my idea to keep him. The boy would’ve been dumped in a grimm pool or something if I had my way, then Neo had to step in and proposed a better idea.”

“Disguising as your nurse was far too much work to just have it end with a dead newborn. Besides, even I have my limits unlike some people” she glares the hell out of Cinder. “I can play the long game. A missing son returning to his family to erase it? That’s way more interesting don’t you think?”

Cinder circled around Ruby, watching the girl carefully as she indulged herself with explaining how a day like this could happen.“You asked me what I did to him. I did the only thing that made sense. I told the truth.” Ruby’s face softened. Her eyes scanned the ground as she tried to understand. The truth? Cinder groaned, “Boring I know, but a lie this big would be impossible. Ruby Rose, a name known by every last goddamn soul on Remnant. Between that and Dustin’s features, he’d figure out that he wasn’t ours sooner or later, so I told him exactly who he was. A child stolen by a hero's worst enemy. You should’ve seen the way he wept for you. I told him all I could. How incredible your reputation was to the masses and how you would be remembered throughout history for all time along with your friends. Surely a hero that elite would rescue their son, right?” She smirked, Cinder could see Ruby get pale from the implications.

“He...was waiting for me.” Ruby’s voice crackled and shook. A stark contrast from the laughter Cinder had. “Hahaha, oh he did more than wait! Time after time, your son tried escaping. Each attempt meant him killing grimm that I didn’t even have to influence, and each time it was up to either me or Neo to save his life. His will was quite astonishing, his mind sharp. He tried for years until one day...he actually escaped.”

“What?” Ruby wasn’t expecting Cinder to say that. “He escaped?” Cinder pulled out a scroll and nodded, “He was young too. Barely twelve if I remember. At this point I was at my wits end. I thought my choices were to cut my losses or kill him out of spite; Never did I expect him to come back with a look in his eyes I’ve never seen. The anger for his situation had changed. All because of one simple little thing.” The scroll was flipped around for Ruby to see. “Remember this day?”

Of all the things that Ruby expected, a picture of her from an old news photo wasn’t one of them. It was her holding Carmen up proudly after the girl’s first tournament. Her daughter had entered a jr competition at eight and took first place. Cinder put the scroll away. “Apparently he made it all the way to that event. Imagine the look on his face, seeing you smiling so purely with the sister he had no clue about? All that faith he put into you...and it meant nothing. Congratulations, how’s it feel to move forward? It brought him closer to me. My sweet Dustin.” Cinder and Neo fawned dramatically. Their laughter grew as Ruby’s anger rose. Her blood started to feel like it’s boiling and vision started to blur. Her eyes started glowing before flickering in and out constantly as she tried her damnedest to eradicate Cinder to no avail. A pounding in her head started forming that made her grip it. Cinder bent down and tugged hard on Ruby’s hair to stare right into her face with complete disdain. “That’s right Ruby, hate me. Hate me as much as I hate you. This isn’t about justice or preservation. Your anger vs ours. Let’s see who edges out.” Cinder backs away and blasts a wave of ice that only freezes then shatters only the vines. Crescent Rose is stabbed into the ground next to Ruby. This day was unavoidable. These feelings had been building a festering for years. Not just because of Dustin. Beacon, Pyrrha, the friends she’s hurt; the despair Cinder brought into Ruby’s life was too much and too often. Ruby had enough. She pulled herself up off the ground with her scythe. Eyes devoid of light beamed into the two pairs of glimmering evil as the clouds darkened the sky. Ruby could only think of one thing.The only thing that Cinder had thought about for ages.

“I’m gonna kill you.”

xxxx

The sounds of thunder and gun fire raged through and electrified the air as Dustin rode the nevermore. He looked back to see a concentration of wind and varying elements coming from where he left. “Looks like they’ve gotten serious. Time for me to get my party started.” He would be over Ruby’s house in a matter of minutes. Karma was finally gonna come knocking on her door. “A shame she won’t see this. Alright, time to see what my little sister I made-” a sudden pressure and force came upwards that hit like a canon. Next thing Dustin knew, the nevermore no longer had a head and was swan dive to the ground. He quickly jumped from the bird and rolled onto the sand to break his fall. Carmine watched the whole thing while cleaning grimm blood of her blade several feet away.

“I’ve never heard mom sound so panicked before. Grimm herds aren’t anything we haven’t handled before so I knew there was more to the situation; but what exactly is the more?” Carmine couldn’t make out his face from distance but the scythe on the sand and cloak were more than enough to be off putting. She stepped closer cautiously. The color of his hair and eyes immediately made her stop and jump back, placing her sword in front of her body as he stood. “Stop! Who are you?” He patted himself off and looked at his sister. Admittedly, he was caught off guard. This was already more interesting than he anticipated.

“What on Remnant possessed you to take out a grimm mid-flight? I doubt you noticed me.”

“A lone grimm going after a house outside of the kingdom when its friends are having a blast inside is pretty freaking suspicious. Now answer my question!” Her body tensed. Carmine didn’t know why but she felt as if his gaze alone might swallow her up like a pit of tar. There was no mistaking that color. His eyes looked fogged and hazy but they were definitely silver. Then there was his face. Carmine never imagined Garnet would look like grown up but this man’s face would’ve been pretty close.

“Huh, figures they never mentioned me. It was probably too shameful and humiliating to reveal such a major example of arrogance.” His words felt like venom and on the verge of being unhinged, yet maintaining a low tone of composure as he grabbed his weapon. “I think you already have a good guess on who I am, or do you need a closer look?”

Carmine saw the man vanish in the blink of an eye. She quickly rose her sword in front of her in a block that covered her entire body. A clash of metal crashed right into it and rattled her arms from the force. Now they were face to face with a similar look of intensity. “I….I don’t understand what’s going on!” Saying that this was unnerving was an understatement. Carmine has a job to do though. The longer he was with her, the further her clone was with Garnet. The only regret was splitting her sure evenly. Fighting an unknown opponent could go wrong.

“It’s simple really. You’re not the first born child of Jaune Arc and Ruby Rose. That kid got snatched by a witch.”

Carmine’s world felt like it stopped. “Cinder Fall.”

“Bingo.” A vine shot from the ground and wrapped around Carmine before flinging her. Dustin followed up with a leaping downward strike but Carmine corrected herself mid-air yo block it. “Heh, look at you…” his hand slid to the bottom of his scythe and started swiping side to side against Carmine’s defenses. Each contact made sparks fly and her arms ache from the weight of the attack. She couldn’t take it anymore and ducked under the next attack to get in close. Both opponents were no stranger to the limitations of a scythe or had to overcome them. Carmine knew he was likely to pull the entire thing back by bringing his hand to the top of the shaft, so she jumped straight up and grabbed her curved blade, Stamen, from both ends and swung it down to have it drop like a guillotine. The impact left a small crater where Dustin stood before he jumped out of the way. She had no expectations of hitting him but she needed breathing room. It was her turn on offense.

Carmine shot off three aura slashes before pursuing him. She watched closely as his scythe spun to block the attack and leaped over him to get a hit in from behind. More vines shot up and stabbed her hand before connecting. A low hiss came from her. This was obviously his semblance but knowing it’s function was hard to tell. More shot up around her in a circle. A simple spin cut them down to size easily and she unleashed a flurry of rapid attacks that clanged and bashed against his scythe when she wasn’t missing him entirely.

“Geez, maybe I overestimated. All the talk about my little sister and this is it?”

“Big talk from someone fighting a kid, and we’re not family!” Carmine swung at his left torso but was stopped dead in her tracks when he grabbed the blade with his hand. A jab to the throat made Carmine choke on her own breath as Dustin twisted her arm behind her then put her in a choke hold. Her feet barely scraped the sand as she desperately tried to breathe. Carmine could feel his breath on her ear as he whispered angrily through his teeth.

“Don’t act stupid and face the facts. It’s the least a sorry excuse for a replacement; don’t even have silver eyes like our brother.” He squeezed her wrist so tight she could feel it start to give. Stamen was dropped as she tried not to scream. “As for the age difference, three years ago I was already filling graves. What do you do? Rule over the talentless? Tournaments are useless. Just like you.”

Carmine squirmed and bit her lip till she bled. Screw the pain and his words. Weak was the last thing she was, and she was gonna prove it. “LET. ME. GOOOO!” Carmine felt a pop in her wrist as she jerked forward, hard. Her feet stomped the ground and two rose clones appeared on each side, the first grabbed her sword and drove it against Dustin’s ribs. The blow broke his hold on the original by pushing him back. The second clone grabbed his legs so he would fall backwards. It worked. Dustin’s head hit the ground and he stared up to the sky as the first clone did the guillotine drop the original did earlier. “Take this!!!!” It screamed.

Dustin hit his fist against the ground. Vines shot pierced right through the clone then swooped low to stab the other. With the last of its strength, the first clone tossed the sword to the original as she watched her clones go limp; their bodies faded as black roses bloomed the vines. Maybe it was their manner of defeat, but Carmine started to sweat. She hadn’t even realized she picked up her blade and was backing away from the man surrounded by a garden of death. A gut feeling told her that being trapped in those spelled the end.

Her semblance was info Dustin knew nothing about. To see it was genuinely surprising, but nothing he had to fear. Not with Carmine looking like a deer in headlights. “Do you know what black roses symbolize?” Carmine didn’t answer. Instead she pulled out the second part of her weapon, Pistil, and combined it with Stamen. The blade curved downward while the collapsible tactical baton connected to the hilt to make her scythe. Dustin felt a surge of excitement run through him. Another surprise from his sister. “HAHAHAHA! Oh please don’t tell me you’re about to challenge me with that?” He laughed hysterically, his calm demeanor completely shifting to nothing short of rage. He stabbed his scythe in the ground. “Rotten Rose will ruin you.”

“Rosebud hasn’t failed me yet.” Carmine got low and held on with both hands. Her right wrist aches but adrenaline and necessity demanded its use. Carmine needed all the reach she could muster. Dustin was done talking and put up his hood. Alarms, screams, explosions, even the wind blowing felt muted to Carmine. The only thing that mattered was the reaper in front of her. She was going to get through this and reject those black roses. Today wasn’t death day. Not for her. The vines shot straight at her. Carmine shredded through them like a blender by twirling Rosebud. Two more vines from each side forced her to jump straight up. She pulled a trigger on the shaft of the used to be tactical baton. A slug round recoil sent her back to the ground where a massive sweeping attack severed the vines. It wasn’t enough.

Her brief rest was interrupted by more sprouting from the ground around her. Another gunshot sent her out of the center before they all stabbed her from every side. More and more dove in and out of the ground like serpents chasing prey. Dustin stood motionless as his sister fired herself in any direction she could to avoid a strike. Occasionally she was forced to stand her ground to cut several before dodging again. She tried to hide it, but Dustin could see the fear in her eyes. He was gonna force it out of her. A wall of thorny vines walled off Carmine from back stepping again. Dozens of vines came from everywhere in the front. The fear he wanted didn’t come. Carmine grit her teeth and started slashing through them head on.

Chunks of plants flew everywhere as Carmine hacked angrily through them. “Haaaaaa!” The girl could only scream through the pain as thorns scraped her skin like a million stabs. “Just...a little...more!!!!” She refused to stop until a swing cut through to the other side. The sight of Dustin’s shocked face spurred her on. Another gunshot was sending her straight at him with Rosebud’s blade eagerly awaiting to connect with his throat. “You’re done!!!!” All her force went into swinging the blade; too much strength in fact. Dustin simply leaned back Carmine completely whiffed. Her momentum kept her body rotating. In the moment her body had turned away from him, her eyes could only see the blood stained thorns she borrowed through. Carmine’s anger subsided and was reminded of the most basic rule of fighting. Keep track of your aura. Her mistake for forgetting was an instant and excruciating pain that crossed her from each shoulder down to the opposite hip. It all had happened so fast yet time felt slow as the ground seemed to rise to meet her.

Carmine laid face down on the ground. Her back started to feel wet. Like if someone was pouring something warm on it, something thick. Tears filled her eyes seconds later when the shock of it all was met by the stinging of sand and reality.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH~”

Carmine couldn’t stop screaming in agony. Her arms did her best to lift her but her right wrist gave out. Everything was giving out. There wasn’t a muscle that wasn’t shaking in her body. There wasn’t a thought of anything anymore with the sound of creeping plants and footsteps approaching while a shadow loomed over her. The silhouette of her blood dripping off the scythe that was ready to draw more. The shaft of it flipped her battered body over for her to stare into the eyes that should’ve been preserving life; but all she saw was them asking for hers. Was this despair? Carmine never felt anything like it before. For the first time in her life she felt powerless, weak. Her tears ran down her bloody and soiled face. “Pl-Please…” she said, quivering. “ I don’t wanna die…” she shut her eyes and lost all sense of self. “I DON’T WANNA DIE!!!”

“CARMINE!!!” Multiple people cried out from a distance. Dustin turned his dead and was immediately blasted by a laser gun in the face that knocked him away. The current of electricity stunned him momentarily as he saw three more people. Two of them he had heard and learned about. The leader of team SSSN and his partner. The third was an unknown boy with bird wings that picked up Carmine while the other two stood in front of them. “Sun and Neptune. What are the odds the partners of a disbanded team are hanging out today of all days? One of you doesn’t even live on this continent.” He glared at Neptune.

The duo immediately recognized the man in front of them and gasped. No way they wouldn’t. Neptune gasped, “Is that…?”

“No way…” Sun said. He looked back at an injured Carmine then to Dustin. No doubt about it. He clapped his hands together and summoned clones. Now wasn’t the time to let his guard down. “I don’t know how you’re here but I’m not letting you go. Aero, get Carmine far away from here.”

“Not on my watch!” Dustin dashed forward immediately. Neither the clones or pro huntsman were quick enough to stop him blitzing the both of them. He reached to grab the boy holding his sister, then poof, nothing. It was like magic. Dustin blinked and they were gone. They went from right in front of him to already being in the sky, several minutes away. Whatever happened wasn’t speed. He didn’t know what that was, but it was definitely the boy’s doing. He looked back at Sun and Neptune who were charging at him in full force. Dustin clicked his teeth and sighed. Play time was over. “Two pro huntsmen like yourselves is way more than I bargained for. Especially after my other reunion, sorry.” A faint light in the distance caught his eye while planning his exit. Whatever it was had speed and was heading towards the storm over Cinder’s battle. “If I was a betting man…” Dustin used his vines to left himself into the air and grab a passing nevermore to ride, leaving Sun and Neptune in the dust.

“Damnit!” Sun yelled.

“Never mind him, let’s get back to town and help.” Neptune said, seeing the light. “Jaune’s gonna be pissed.”

xxxx

Aero was flying as fast as he could to the medical station set up. Finding Jaune or his friend would be like searching for a needle in a haystack. What he wouldn’t give to have a healing semblance right now. The blood that came from Carmine and dripped down his arms as she wept in pain was burning a memory into him he didn’t want to ever see again.

“Hang in there Carmine! You’re gonna be just fine. Your clone found my mom so don’t worry about Garnet. He’s perfectly fine.” He told her to ease whatever pain and stress he could. The way she clung close to him wasn’t inspiring any change. Carmine kept weeping and shaking.

“Hurts…” she winced. “It hurts so much.” Aero felt a lump in his throat. The boy kept flying with all his might. The tears of the strongest person he knew weighed heavily on his heart the entire flight.”

xxxx

That fight against Reaper and Maiden wasn’t fairing too much better. Neo could attest to that as she laid on the ground, aura flickering and writhing in pain. The normally dry, dusty air was soaked with pouring rain thanks to Cinder. Neo picked herself up painfully slow and could barely keep track of the hundreds of petals and embers that danced in the air over panicking villagers. Who would’ve thought Little Red would’ve grown into such a warrior? To Neo, both Cinder and Ruby might as well be freaks. She watched Crescent Rose carv through ice thicker than a goliath’s flesh and slam into Cinder. The woman went right through the already destroyed memorial tree before recovering with a tiny cyclone of lightning and fire that enveloped Ruby. That too was immediately reduced to nothing. Fortunately, Ruby looked tired. Her own aura and breath looked to be draining.

“Looks like this might be it.” Neo aimed her pistol. “Sorry Cinder, I get the kill-” the blur of bright light raced into view and then before Neo. Her eyes were witnesses to the shining white aura of a furious knight with a sword poised to strike her neck. Any time to move was erased to her as the blade was swung. The force would’ve been enough to take her head. The only thing stopping that was Dustin’s scythe between them that went unnoticed until now. Dustin’s arms went numb but his face remained stern as he stared at his father inches away who was lost for words.

“D-Dustin?” He uttered in disbelief. The hesitation left Jaune open for Dustin’s vines to grab him and throw him towards Ruby. The battling women had finally realized company had arrived

Dustin helped lift Neo to her feet. “You alright?” A pinch on the cheek and a nod told him that was a yes. Cinder landed near them while still facing Ruby and now Jaune.

“Why are you back?” She growled.

“Things got complicated, more huntsman. Time to go. We didn’t come here from a swan song.”

“Like hell! I’m just getting started.” Cinder made a bow and arrow out of lightning and took aim. “Ruby dies today.”

Not if Ruby had anything to say about it. She was ready for another exchange of blows but her anger was quelled when the sight of fresh blood was washing off of Dustin’s scythe. “Dustin, what did you do?Where’s Carmine and Garnet!?” Jaune was still shaken by who he was seeing. How was this possible? The sight of Cinder and Neo enraged him but the words Ruby said were brought to the forefront of his mind. “Carmine? Sun and Neptune should’ve-”

“I never saw Garnet.” Dustin interrupted. “As for Carmine...I’m sure she’s in shock by now. Fortunately for her my full swing wasn’t possible with how close she was. All blood, no lasting damage. Well...that’s not true. Trauma is tricky like that.” He smirked at his parent’s mortified faces. Dustin touched Cinder’s back. “Let’s go! We’ll kill them later. That wasn’t the point of this anyways.”

Ruby and Jaune tried their best to ready themselves as their son stepped forward and pointed at them. “Mark today. The peace you’ve cultivated in my absence will fall as easily as your daughter did, by my- our hands.”he declared. Ruby wasn’t even sure who she was looking at. The face she remembered was not covered in a hate and tragedy that mirrored the two by his side. Her heart couldn’t take it, it wouldn’t. Ruby was about to try and grab him when a shriek filled the air. The villagers down below were being trapped and attacked by vines. Ruby looked at Dustin. “Stop this!”

“You can either stop it yourself, or chase us. Choose fast. It’s not healthy to be wrapped too long.” The nevemore more extended its wing for them to walk on. He watched Ruby take another step before tightening his grip on screaming children. Ruby and Jaune looked in conflicting frustration before Jaune went to help them. “Ruby! I can’t do it all alone!”

Once again Ruby was asked to make the choice to chase her child or do her job. Grief filled her as she looked at him then stared at Cinder in seething hate. “Your head will roll if it’s the last thing I do.” Ruby threatened, joining Jaune to save the people. The nevermore took off and Cinder angrily aimed her bow before Neo blocked her sight with her umbrella.

“Don’t. Let’s not give them more reasons to hunt us now. It’s like Dustin said. This was just our first move. Break their world, then their lives. We waited this long. Just look at our handy work.”

Cinder watched the chaos of a small town and kingdom struggle with her grimm. To say it didn’t make her smile would be a lie. Yeah, she needed more of this. “It’s no Beacon, but it’s a damn good place to start.” Cinder looked at Dustin with more pride than she knew how to deal with. “Oh how I have high hopes for you. Do keep making your mothers proud. Dustin bowed respectively and watched the ruin along with her.

Finally a new game had started and the first move was theirs. Dustin couldn’t wait for his next one. “Here’s to a speedy recovery Carmine… Your big brother will be sure to visit.”

[outlawsworld]

Trusting strangers - Chapter 2

Arthur Morgan x Female reader

Summary: Reader reveals the truth about where she is from but is worried about the consequences.

Warnings: mention or abuse and rape. But just fluff.

Author notes: I enjoyed writing the first one so much that I had to continue. Please let me know if you like it and if I should keep writing. I know a fair bit happens in this chapter but it's all setting the scene for the rest of the story ❤️🤠

Chapter one here

--

''We got time'' The words rang in your ears like alarm bells. You knew you had no choice but to tell Arthur the truth.

You had played out in your head this situation many times. How you were going to tell the gang the truth. Hosea was going to be the one you told. He had always been kind to you and he would definitely listen to the full story. The last person you expected to confess to was Arthur but here you were. 

You breathed out a sigh and looked down at your feet. Arthur was still standing over you hand ready at his gun belt.

''Well go on, spit it out'' He grunted impatiently. You looked up at him straight in the eye almost pleading with him to not make you speak but it was no use. Arthur was not one to back down from what he wanted.

''My daddy owned a ranch just outside of a city called Saint Denis. He bred and sold fine horses. They were worth a ton of money so this attracted all sorts of people. Mostly rich people but also thieves as you would expect. There was only me, my daddy and my mamma. My mama was a small housewife that didn't have any fondness for horses. I guess they hoped I would be a boy so they had someone else to help. My dad didn't care that I was a girl because as soon as I could walk, I could ride. He taught me everything I know about horses and he knew a lot.'' You paused to look at Arthur.

His expression was unmoved. ''So you're a rich girl?'' He laughed under his breath rolling his eyes.

''Hold on a minute, I told you it was a long story and I ain't done'' you fired back irritated by Arthur's reaction. ''He also taught me how to shoot. Having so many good horses we had to learn to defend our ranch from thieves that came along. I got good at it too. I would spend hours helping my daddy on the ranch and then go practise shooting everyday.'' You looked back down at your feet.

''One night a big storm hit and I went out to make sure the horses were alright. I heard gunshots coming from the house but by the time I got there these men had killed my daddy and beaten my mama bloody. My daddy had managed to gun down a load of them before they stormed the house. I didn't have a gun on me and they soon grabbed me too. They kept me and my mama hostage for a few months. Feeding us next to nothin' and beating us when they wanted somethin' to do. My mama didn't last long, not with all the beatings before....well at least she is in a better place.'' You closed your eyes for a moment trying to hold back tears as you remembered the past events. Composing yourself you carried on.

''After she passed the men thought beating me wasn't as fun anymore. They needed something more...I tried to fight them off at first but I didn't have the energy. They would pin me down, rip my clothes off me and have their fun. There was nothin' I could do. I was defensless and weak. This went on for a month or two but it felt like a liftime'' Your voice wavered but not with sorrow but with anger and embarrassment. 

''One night, one of the men came and had his way with me but after forgot to tie me back up and passed out drunk. I managed to sneak through the house to my Daddy's gun closet. Got my hands on his best rifle and took out every single one of the men in the house. There were more of them outside and I knew they had heard the gunshots so I took off. Grabbed our best stallion and rode as fast as I could outta there.'' 

''Some came after me but I managed to gun them down but there was a witness and I was suddenly an outlaw. My face was plastered on every poster in town. No one would listen to me and if they did no one would believe me. I ran changing from place to place for a couple months. Pick pocketing and hunting to stay alive but I was barely breathing. I hadn't eaten properly in months. A couple of weeks back the men from my daddy's ranch caught up to me and gunned my horse down. They had me surrounded, I tried to give them a good fight but there was too many of em'. Last thing I remember was getting hit over the head with something hard and waking up to Bill finding me. They must have thought they had killed me because I know that they wouldn't have left me there if they knew I was alive. They would have taken me back to the ranch and kept me for their own entertainment. So there. Now you know everything. I've got absolutely nothing and there is a bounty on my head''. You sighed not daring to look at Arthur but needing to know what he was thinking.

The silence was deafening and you could feel your heartbeat getting faster. ''Why didn't you just tell us?'' Arthur finally spoke. His tone was now soft compared to the harshness before. 

''Tell a bunch of strangers there is a bounty on my head? How would I have known you wouldn't just turn me in?'' You scoffed at his question before silence again. Why was he not saying anything? You wanted to know what he was thinking but he wasn't giving anything away. Instead he just turned to his horse and mounted before giving you a look to do the same. You mounted up and kept a slow walk next to Arthur. Your chest felt tight as you hung your head low. The feeling of embarrassment and ashame overcame you as you realised there was no going back. Arthur, the man you barely knew and didnt trust, knew everything.

The ride back was quiet and slow. Neither of you had spoken a word to each other and it was making your mind go crazy. You knew as soon as you got to camp Arthur would tell Dutch and the next day you'll be turned in for your bounty. There was no use running. Arthur had proven he is not a man to be messed with and you knew you wouldn't get far. You came to the conclusion that this was it. There was no point in fighting anymore.

''I'm sorry'' Arthurs low voice brought you back to reality. Shocked, you looked at him and he turned to meet your eye. ''No one should av' gone through all that. Those men got what they deserved''. For the first time he was properly looking at you. He had no sarcastic tone in his voice and he looked genuinely sympathetic towards you. Arthur was the first person you had told and you expected him to just spit and laugh in your face but here he was actually showing kindness to you. 

''It's in the past now.'' You broke the eye contact between you both. ''You gonna tell Dutch?'' although you didn't want to ask, you couldn't help yourself. You had finally found people who were nice to you after months of tourchur and you didn't want to loose that.

''It's your past'' He paused looking away from you ''Not up to me who knows it or not but you may wanna tell 'em at some point'' You nodded gratefully in reply. You couldn't believe what you were hearing. All this time trying to find someone who would listen to your story without calling you a liar or trying to turn you in with no luck. The last person you expected to listen, to truly listen and understand, was Arthur. Maybe you judged him too quickly.

You both arrived back in camp in the mid afternoon. The camp was quiet as people were out doing their daily jobs. The smell of the stew coming from Pearson's pot was mouthwatering after the morning you had. Mrs Grimshaw was the first to greet you as you arrived at the hitching posts.

''Where the hell av' you been Miss (Y/N)?'' She looked you up and down and you dismounted Johns horse. ''We all thought you had up and left'' Her hands placed on her hips waiting for an answer. She looked angry but slightly relived that you had come back.

''It's my fault Mrs Grimshaw'' Arthur intervened ''I took her hunting with me this mornin', I needed more than one horse and she was the only one awake'' Mrs Grimshaw turned her attention to Arthur.

''Well next time let me know before you go off like that but at least you made yourself useful Miss'' She softened her tone when Arthur spoke up for you. ''Better get some food and get on with the rest of your chores then'' she smiled before she walked off to go and yell at someone else. 

You breathed a sigh of relief ''Does she ever take a day off?'' You smirked as you began to untack the horses.

''Nah but you'll get used to it'' Arthur smiled at you and nodded before leaving you to take the buck to Pearsons cart. You watched him leave with a slight warmness in your chest and a smile on your face. 'Get used to it' does this mean you will be sticking around? You assumed Arthur might still have intentions to turn you in and collect a decent bounty but these words changed your thoughts. The feeling of telling the truth with no bad consequences made you relax a little. You began to think if you thought Arthur was the worst man here then this gang isn't too bad..

The rest of the afternoon went quickly. You managed to get all of your chores done in very little time with the help of Tilly and Mary-Beth. You had become very close to these two girls in the short time you were there, almost enough to trust them. Trusting strangers was hard especially when you had been on the run for some time. You learnt only to rely on yourself but these were kind people and they were all in the same position as you. 

''(Y/N)'' You heard your name being called from the hitching posts. ''Come help me with this would ya'' Charles was stood by one of the horses lifting its front leg. Quickly you ran over to him to see what was wrong. 

''You alright?'' You questioned as you observed what he was doing. The horse was losing a shoe but it had twisted and stood on the nail. Before Charles had a chance to respond you grabbed the shoe and started levering it from the horse's hoof while Charles lifted the leg. You managed to get the shoe completely off and without any extra damage to the horses hoof.

''We need to make a poultice to stop any infection but she should be fine in a couple of days'' You patted the mare as Charles released her leg.

''You really know what you are doing, don't cha''' He smiled at you as you got to work with some herbs and material to wrap the mare's foot in. After, you and Charles sat in the shade under the tree observing the rest of the camp while you relaxed. 

You saw Arthur head out again with Hosea riding a big black shire horse. He never got a full day around camp before he was out doing another job again. You couldn't help feel slightly sorry for him as you never saw him truly rest. He must be tired constantly but he never complained as long as it was worth his time. The rest of the camp were beginning to settle for the night and you and Charles peacefully watched the sunsetting. 

''Seems like you have settled in well with the gang'' Charles smiled at you. ''I have only been riding with them for around 6 months and it took me longer to find my place then you have''.

''I just do what I'm told and ask questions later'' You giggled ''But I am glad to have been found by you lot, don't know where I would be if I hadn't'' 

"Probably would have starved" he smirked at you. "I'm glad they found you. I need someone who knows as much about horses as you do" he smiled gesturing to the mare from earlier.

"I'm glad too, like you say I would have died if it wasn't for this gang" you smiled back then looked at the mare. "lookin' after horses don't feel like a chore to me so always happy to help"

Charles looked at you and opened his mouth to say something before he was cut off.

''Charles, (Y/N)!'' Javier called to you both before gesturing to gather round the fire. 

"Come on, better join in or people will start talkin'" Charles helped you to stand and you both walked to join the group.

This became a routine on a night that whoever was in camp would gather round the fire to tell stories. This time Javier told his story and everyone listened intently. You looked around the campfire at each of the gang members and couldn't help but smile. This could work. You could stay here with them and learn to trust each other. The thought made you relax and smile which didn't go unnoticed.

''It's nice to finally see you smile'' a rough voice quietly spoke to you before sitting next to you on the log. He was hushed so it wouldn't draw attention to the rest of the camp. ''I don't think I've seen you smile yet, well not a proper smile anyway''. You looked to see John sitting next to you. He had fresh scars on his face and dark features. 

''Don't think I had reason to'' You turned your attention to him.

''Well it's a nice thing to see. I'm sorry I've never actually had a chance to speak to you. I'm John'' He smiled and held his hand out to you which you shook giggling.

''Why thank you John. (Y/N), nice to finally meet you'' You let go of his hand and you smiled back at the fire in front of you. ''I guess I'm smiling because I'm happy. Haven't felt happy in a while'' you admitted.

''Well...I'm glad you are happy. There ain't much we can offer but at least we have each other'' John looked around the camp and then back to you. ''You will be safe with us. By the way, thank you for going huntin' with Arthur today. I definitely wasn't in the best way this mornin'" he laughed gesturing to his head.

"No problem, it was nice to get outta camp" you smirked.

"I trust old boy was good with you?"

"Oh god, I forgot to thank you for letting me borrow her. Yes, she's a good horse" you smiled looking in the horses direction.

"That she is. Well you must have been good company because I didn't get an earful from Arthur when he got back" John took a sip of whiskey. "Normally I wouldn't hear the end of it"

You spoke to John for a while as you found he was easy to talk to. He told you how he got his scars and how Arthur and Javier had saved him. The scars were healing well and he was nearly back to full strength so he would be off running jobs again soon. As the night drew to a close John walked you back to your tent and wished you a good night before taking his leave. 

You laid on your bedroll in your tent staring at the ceiling. The smile was still plastered across your face and you finally felt like you were in the right place. Everything seemed to fit perfectly. What a day....you didn't want to let yourself get too used to this feeling as you knew that things could change in a day. But just for tonight you allowed yourself the feeling of happiness. You were safe for now.

The next day was slow. You had done all of your chores by midday and there was nothing much to do. The only reason you felt like this was because for the last two days you had been out of camp. So being cooped up all day was slightly boring. You decided to go round and see if anyone needed your help. John was just about to go on watch so you asked to tag along which he accepted gratefully. It was a nice sunny day without a cloud in the sky so you were more then happy to sit out with him.

''You know it's nice to 'av company for once. Can get boring by yourself'' He walked to the spot to keep a look out and you sat at the bottom of the tree beside him. 

''Well I'm glad I could tag along. I like to keep busy'' You admitted.

''Really?'' He asked surprised ''The rest of the girls are normally happy to 'av the afternoon off but if your ever bored feel free to join me'' 

You sat with John for a couple of hours talking about the gang. ''Nah, he's a lazy old man but he's harmless. Wait till he tells you stories from when he was young. That'll make you laugh'' John laughed whilst talking about Uncle. 

''I'll keep that in mind when I'm next trying to avoid him'' You were both in fits of laughter that tears were almost falling from your eyes. Soon you composed yourself and Bill came to take the next watch. Without hesitation you stood up and followed close behind John back to camp before Bill offered for you to sit with him as well.

John giggled at this ''You ain't a fan of Bill then?'' 

''I'm just cautious. He's never the kindest''. Plus you didn't want to admit it but you really enjoyed John's company and replacing that with Bill's would have been dissapointing. 

"Yeah I wouldn't say that but he ain't so bad. He's dumb as rocks but he won't hurt ya" John comforted you. He patted you on your shoulder, gave you a friendly smile and went to his tent for some rest.

When you reached the camp you went to sit with the girls and little Jack. They were braiding each other's hair and Tilly was teaching Jack to make a flower chain. You complained about how bored you had been all day and they all hmmed in agreement. Before long you were all talking about Mrs Grimshaw and how she thinks she is the one in charge around here. Once you had your hair neatly braided by Abigail you decided to head to your tent to have a nap but as you were making your way across camp you heard shouting as Hosea and Arthur arrived back from their trip.  

You carried on towards your tent expecting them both to go to the rest of the camp when you caught a glimpse of Arthur heading straight towards you.

''Y/N'' Arthur called to you. This was the first time he said your name and somehow it hit differently with you. Something inside you said if your name was worth learning then he had accepted you into the gang. You stopped in your tracks and before you knew it Arthur was standing in front of you. ''I've got something for ya'' He motioned his head to follow him and without question you did.

He took you over to the hitching post where a beautiful Black, American Saddler, Stallion, stood. You gave Arthur a confused look as you approached the horse giving it a firm pat on the neck. 

''You don't have a horse and....Well Hosea needed to sell one so....and I'm starting to like my new one. I thought'' He paused and looked at your shocked face as you realised what he was trying to say. ''Well he's yours if you want 'im''

Was this real? Had Arthur gone out of his way to get you your own horse. You looked at the beautiful stallion and back to Arthur. ''I don't know what to say'' Your mouth was hanging open but your lips were upturned into a smile. 

Arthur smiled at you ''I wanted to say thank you for helping me out yesterday'' He paused as you nodded at him with a grateful smile. His voice was soft and genuine again. ''This was the best one of a bad bunch, I knew I couldn't get you a cheap nag as I remembered you knew too much about 'em. Didn't think I would get away with it" Arthur joked but tried to keep a straight face as to come across serious.

''Thank you Arthur'' You smiled before fully looking over the horse. Arthur blushed under the brim of his hat at hearing you say his name. You could tell Arthur didn't want you to think he was capable of kindness as he made up the excuse of getting you a shit horse. But the more you looked over the stallion the more you knew that it was a fine one. It wouldn't have been cheap if he had actually bought it. ''I owe you one'' You said trying to look at him from over the horses back. 

''You can help me with a job tomorrow if you are up for it? Gives you chance to test your steed out'' He took the saddle off the horses back ''It's just a little house robbery but I need another pair of hands just in case something goes wrong'' .

''Sure'' You took the bridle off the horse ''but wouldn't you rather go with one of the men'' You gave him a questioning look.

''You are just as good as any of 'em by the way you handled yourself yesterday'' Arthur got a brush out of the saddle bag before passing it to you. ''Unless you feel you ain't up for it'' he teased you waiting for a reaction.

''Oh, I'm more than up for it'' you smirked at him before beginning to brush your horse down. ''I was just making sure''.

''I'll let you two get acquainted then'' Arthur gave you a cheeky smile before heading over to the rest of the camp leaving you with your new horse. 

You couldn't help but feel excited to go on your first real job for the gang. Does this mean they trust you. So many thoughts rushed through your head but the main one was......what do I name you? 

While you were thinking about names you heard a man screaming from the camp. You looked over to see what all the noise was and you saw Dutch, Bill and Arthur standing around the man they had tied to one of the trees. He had been there the whole time you had been in the camp. Tied to the tree like that for weeks on end. You avoided him most of the time as you had no idea why he was there and you were new to camp. Fratanising with the enemy wouldn't look too good for you. Occasionally you would ask him if he was okay but that was all.

They had pulled his trousers down and Bill was holding a huge pair of tweezers threatening to geld him. You watched as you saw Arthur's face hardened again as he threatened the man. He was so confusing, one minute you think he is a kind caring man and the next he does something like this. You had to think twice as you had done things you were not proud of too, to servive, and maybe that's all he was doing. Although he seemed to be enjoying this a bit too much. Doubt filled your thoughts and suddenly you couldn't help thinking maybe he was only showing you kindness to keep you on there side, to stop you running off. You might be valuable to them. There was already $2000 on your bounty, imagine if that went up the longer you were an outlaw.

You pushed these thoughts to the back of your mind as you watched them untie the young man from the tree. Arthur pushed him into a walk and Dutch hollered for John to go with Arthur and Bill. You managed to hear them talking about finding an O'Driscoll hide out. Before you knew it the four men were riding out of camp on another job.

"No rest for the wicked" you wispered into your horses ear.

You began to regain your thoughts. "Dallas, I think that suits you" you carried on brushing the stallion until he was gleaming and it began to get dark.

There wasn't many of you round the campfire tonight. You sat with a bowl of stew and kept warm by the flames. Someone grabbed your shoulder and you looked up to see Hosea stood over you.

"How you doing little lady?" He asked. He reminded you of your daddy in this moment. 'Little lady' used to be what he would call you but he also had the tender look in his eye, the same look Hosea was giving you now. He was like you dad in many ways the more you thought of it. He was kind and soft but tough and stern when he needed to be. Just the other day you saw him threaten Bill with his pistle because Bill was too drunk and getting on his last nerve.

"I'm alright Hosea, and you?" You answered back.

"I'm not bad, thanks for asking" he looked around the campfire for a minute. "Fancy accompanying me on a stroll round the camp?"

You nodded your head before standing up. Hosea held out his arm for you to link yours through as you set off on your walk. You were both quiet at first, it wasn't at all awkward but peaceful. The noises from the surrounding nature was relaxing, you could hear the water stream nearby and the sound of owls in the trees.

"Where did you get off too last night, anything exciting?" You decided to break the silence.

"Arthur and I decided to go hunt a bear I had heard about. The animal was about the size of a house and unfortunately got the better of me" he turned and smiled to you but he seemed troubled. "Arthur mentioned that you had told him about your past" you eyes widened as Hosea spoke. Suddenly your heartbeat raced and you began to look around for some sort of trap he was walking you into.

"Whoa, calm down there" Hosea petted your arm. "He didn't tell me anything just that you will tell your story when you are good and ready. He said to trust you"

You felt a sudden rush of relief which made you dizzy. Hosea saw the look on your face of panic and paused for you to say something. "It's not that I didn't want to tell you Hosea" you looked at him and you saw your farther in this moment. You went with your gut feeling which was screaming at you to tell him everything.

Hosea listened to every word as you spoke, not once turning his glance away. When you started to get upset he took both your hands in his and squeezed them tight. The warmth from his hands gave you strength and made you trust him instantly. After you finished he pulled you in for a long hug. You didn't know how much you needed human affection until the moment. The tears came streaming down your face and soaked his shirt but he didn't seem to mind. He was warm and you felt safe in his arms at this moment.

Hosea broke the hug before lifting your chin to look him in the eye. "You fit in here more than you know. We need you just as much as you need us and I promise that no one will ever lay a hand on you again" he smiled and you knew he wasn't lying. "Arthur speaks very highly of you, sees great things and now I do too".

You felt a huge weight lifted off your shoulders. Maybe Hosea was right, maybe you did fit in more then you ever cared to realise. You both made your way back to the campfire and you thanked Hosea for everything before taking a seat. As you looked round the fire it was like you saw everyone for the first time. They were all outlaws running from something. They had all been scared and mistreated but they had each other and you were now part of that. Through all the shit you had been through, you thought no one would understand but everyone here would. Of course they would because they had all been through hell and back together. You just needed to learn to trust them and maybe you were already starting too.

--

Chapter 3

[saturnwritings]

freeze your brain

—after a disheartening start to the evening leads you to hide under a table at a party, a chance encounter with kenma leads you to have one of the best nights of your life. | based on a pov by a cosplayer on tiktok (@/sea.kaninchen)

pairing(s): kenma x reader, past/brief daishou x reader 

word count: 3993

warnings: cheating, hints to sexual themes (only briefly)

a/n: i think i should mention that I DONT HATE DAISHOU!!! i think hes a complex and interesting character and ppl shit on him a lot but i did need a villain for this so im sorry for being basic he doesnt deserve this 😪also i was honestly really excited to do this?? like tiktok cosplayers’ povs are not bad i love cosplayers its just straight tiktok’s povs im sorry 😔 

9:32pm.

You let out a sigh as you glance at your phone for what seemed like the thousandth time that night, the numbers moving slow, in almost a mocking way. The blinding, multi-colored lights dancing around the room kind of made your eyes spin, and the air around you made you wonder if it was possible to describe air as ‘sticky’ and what… questionable ways it could get to that state. There were bodies moving all around the room, most likely all around the house, doing a multitude of things: dancing, talking, loitering.

You had been coerced by your friends, as well as your boyfriend, Daishou, to come to this party, with promises of letting loose and free food. As reluctant as you were, your boyfriend had assured you that he would personally make sure you had a good time; said boyfriend was nowhere to be seen.

As you leaned against the wall, you raised your phone screen to your face as you mindlessly scrolled through various social media feeds and such, trying to pass the time. Ultimately, there’s only so much you can do constantly refreshing pages. On top of that, it might have just been your imagination but people seemed to stop and sneak looks at you, probably wondering why you were staying by yourself in a corner for so long.

Putting your phone away, you decided to approach some of Daishou’s friends - after all, the least he could do was to hang out with you at the party he kind of forced you to go to. Taking a quick look around the room, your eyes landed on a group of boys hanging out on the couches, you recognized them as your boyfriend’s friends. You greeted them as best as you could over the loud music, almost pounding your eardrums.

“I was just wondering, have you seen Daishou anywhere?” As soon as you mentioned his name, that atmosphere within the group grew tense. They all seemed to avoid eye-contact and some even started fidgeting. Suddenly, one of the boys spoke up.

“I- uhm, I think I saw him go upstairs?” He was met with pointed looks from the rest. Confused, you thanked them nonetheless and located the stairs.

Maneuvering your way through the many bodies on the stairs, you start searching through the many rooms of the house as you think to yourself: Who’s house is this? Why are there so many rooms? You must’ve looked through the first 4 rooms of the hallway (bathroom, storage closet, bedroom, bedroom) before reaching another door.

When you opened the door, thankful it wasn’t locked, you immediately saw two figures in a bed in the middle of the room. Upon closer inspection, you saw that they were very much not having a nap together but instead moving in tandem. You were about to exit before they could see you when one of the figures, a girl, locked eyes with you. She immediately fumbled and pushed the other figure, a boy, off of her and drew the sheets to cover herself. Feeling awkward and frozen in place, you started to spew out apologies. 

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry, I, uhm,” you hands out in a defensive motion “I didn’t mean to walk in! I was just…” You trailed off when the boy turned around and you got a good look of his face. It was then when you had realized it was your boyfriend in a bed with his ex-girlfriend, Mika. 

“Suguru…” Your face morphed into a disheartened expression, “You’re…” you couldn’t finish your sentence though, your eyes frantically shifting between Daishou and Mika, who you had just realized the identity of, in confusion as you opened your mouth to say something, but the words lay stuck in your throat. Fat tears welled up in your eyes, eventually falling down your cheeks, but you had yet to move. 

“y/n! It’s not what you think!” Your boyfriend started as he moved off of the bed and towards you, fumbling for an explanation, but his lack of clothes told you everything. No matter what excuse he came up with, the intentions were clear. 

You choked up and you pushed him away. “Save it! We’re through!” Your voice wavered as you turned and ran out the door, covering your mouth with your hands in an attempt to stifle your crying. Unfortunately, you moved to hide in the bathroom to gather your thoughts, gripping the door handle and pushing when you realized it was locked. 

You looked around for something, you weren’t really quite sure what, but you knew you needed to be away from your boyfriend (ex-boyfriend, you reminded yourself) no matter what. In the heat of the moment, you stumbled your way downstairs and into the dining room. It was completely empty, which came as a surprise, but you realized it was probably because the living room was big enough for everyone to do what they wanted and the food was spread out in the kitchen and living room. 

You managed to take a second to catch a break. You were about to take your phone out to call an Uber when you heard Daishou calling your name. In a moment of panic, your eyes landed on the dining table in the middle of the room. Swiftly, and with less gravitas than you’d like to admit, you crawled under the table, thanking the lords above that it was covered in a table cloth that reached the floor. An interesting style choice? Sure, but you were thankful nonetheless.

Holding your breath, you heard your name being called before you heard footsteps leave the room. So there you were, crying under a table at a party. You could still hear the loud techno and pop music from the other room, albeit muffled, and let it drown out your sorrows. 

You thought of calling an Uber now, but you figured it would be smart to take the time to let your thoughts regroup so you at least stopped crying hysterically. 

***

“Please, Kenma?!” Kuroo pouted as he clasped his hands together, “C’mon, it’s not gonna be that bad, it’ll be really fun!” Kenma sighed. He looked down at his paused game of MonHun and took note of the time.

3:51pm.

It was nearing 4pm and Kenma still had yet to clear this level. “I already told you, I don’t wanna go,” Kenma started, “I don’t like parties.” That had Kuroo bouncing and flailing around.

“But Terushima always throws the best parties, they’re fun for everyone!” Kenma grunted in response, he had started playing his game again, Kuroo narrowed his eyes and pouted even harder. “Pleeease?! Everyone’s gonna be there, it’s gonna be great! But it won’t be fun without you,” Kuroo pleaded. Kenma scoffed at that, he considered agreeing just so shut Kuroo up, but he wanted to know what he was getting into first.

“Who’s gonna be there?” Kenma asked, not looking up from his PSP.

“Everyone!” Kenma thought it was almost comical how Kuroo immediately perked up. Kenma shot him an incredulous look. “Uhm, okay, so I know Bo’s gonna be there, which means Akaashi’s gonna be there… You can hang out with him!” Kenma hummed, only partially listening, “No, you’re right, you’re right! What was I thinking? Obviously Akaashi’s gonna hang out with Bokuto, which means I’m gonna have to third wheel!” He tuned Kuroo out as he went on.

Just as Kenma had lost another round, Kuroo seemed to have finished his rant about being a third-wheel and the dynamics between Bokuto and Akaashi.

“Um, well, I mean pretty much all of the Volleyball teams are gonna be there, Terushima really wants this to be epic! Uhm, other than that… Oh! Isn’t there that girl? I forgot her name but she’s dating… Daishou…” Kuroo shudders, Kenma hummed in response. “She’s in your class isn’t she? What’s her name, you can hang out with her!” 

“y/n.” Kenma offered, still not looking up from his game. 

“Yeah, that’s it! Ugh, she’s kinda strange… like, Daishou? Really? Last time I saw him, he was wearing that ugly sweater…” Kenma tuned him out once again. 

While Kenma continued his game, he subconsciously pondered on your relationship. You guys had never really been close, save for the occasional group and partner projects you guys did together, as was expected, you were in the same class after all. If Kenma was being honest, the only time he paid you any mind was when Kuroo brought up how Daishou was most definitely blackmailing you into dating him or something or the sort.

Fed up with Kuroo’s whining, Kenma spoke up after another round lost. “Kuro, I’ll go to the party,” Kuroo’s eyes widened as he gasped, sporting a surprised smile, Kenma continued, “But if I get bored or stressed, I’m leaving.” 

Kuroo nodded.

***

Needless to say, Kenma wasn’t having a good time. While he did enjoy seeing his friend, Hinata, again, the loud and, quite frankly, annoying music was starting to hurt his ears and the food provided was decent at best, meaning fast food pizza and about a million different bags of chips.

“Kenma! C’mon, get over here! We’re playing beer pong, I need a partner!” Kenma sighed as he heard Kuroo call out to him. From where he was leaning against a wall, he could see Kuroo, Bokuto and Miya Atsumu setting up red solo cups on a table. 

This had been happening all night, Kenma minding his own business, occasionally engaging in conversation with Hinata or Akaashi if they crossed paths, with Kuroo swooping in to try to get him to play some sort of party game with him. The first was Just Dance, which Kenma avoided by saying he was hungry, next came truth or dare, Kenma used the bathroom excuse on that one, and so on and so forth. The cycle continued, Kuroo hunting down Kenma and Kenma finding any way he could escape. 

That led Kenma to this moment: leaning against a wall in the kitchen playing on his PSP, with Kuroo struggling to maneuver around everyone to get to him. Kenma checks the digital clock on his PSP. 

9:46pm.

That seemed like a good time to leave, Kenma thought. As he was pocketing his PSP to get ready to make a dash for it, Kenma panicked for a moment, realizing that to get to the front door, he would have to pass by Kuroo and the beer pong table. Contemplating for a moment, he concluded that he would much rather wait it out and leave a bit later than have to explain why he was leaving. 

When Kenma came to his senses, he realized Kuroo was even closer to him than he thought. Scanning for options, he ran the only direction he could, through the arch connecting the kitchen with the dining room. 

In a moment of desperation, he ducked under the table cloth.

***

You checked yourself again in your phone camera. Thankfully, you had calmed down and stopped crying hysterically, and were only left with the occasional sniffle. Unfortunately, the redness was still very much present, as were the tears when you thought too hard about Daishou. Despite all the nasty things other people, especially in your school, would say about him, he was a kind person, passionate about many things and was very caring towards you: always cheering you up and lending an ear when you needed to vent. 

I guess he just… really liked Mika, then, huh, you thought to yourself as you hugged your knees close to your chest.

Deep in your thoughts, you hadn’t noticed the frantic footsteps making their way towards you. You only realized something was off when the table cloth rustled and was lifted open, only for someone to slip in and under the table with you.

The boy seemed to be catching his breath when you made a startled noise of surprise. Hearing it, the boy snapped his head up to meet your stare. You were both just staring at each other with wide eyes, after a moment you both started fumbling out uhms and i’s, glancing around to avoid eye contact. 

After accidentally looking up at each other at the same time, you realized who the boy was.

“Wait… Kenma?” He blinked.

“y/n?” He responded with a tilt of his head, “Uhm, I’m sorry, I was just… trying to get away from someone…” You shifted in your spot, casting your eyes away in embarrassment hoping he wouldn’t see your red face and stray tears. “What about you?”

“Hm?” Your eyes widened in confusion.

“Why are you, uh,” he paused awkwardly and gestured around vaguely, “What’re you doing under a table?” You didn’t really know how to respond to that.

“Uhm… well,” you felt tears welling up in your eyes again, “I-” a sob wracked through your body. Completely overwhelmed with emotions, you burst into tears. Kenma’s eyes shifted frantically before he regained his composure, he had never really been good and expressing emotions or helping others with theirs.

Kenma thought to himself: What would Kuro do in this situation? Sure, Kenma had gotten upset lots of times, and Kuroo always knew how to help. He realized that one thing that Kuroo did was ask him if he wanted to talk about what was going on - of course, Kenma never did, but for some strange, unknown reason, it made him feel just the tiniest bit better. In the back of his mind, Kenma thought that it made him feel better because it told him there was someone who cared about him.

“Do you, uh, wanna talk about it? Maybe?” He winced at his awkward delivery, his hands fidgeting.

“Is that,” you sniffled, “is that okay?” Kenma tried his best to give a reassuring smile, he was sure it came off as strained.

“Yeah, sure.”

You told Kenma about your relationship with Daishou; how it started, all the ups and downs, and finally how it ended. How you kept having chance encounters: at school when you were out shopping and even late one night at a public library - that was the night he asked you out for the first time, and you couldn’t have been more smitten. 

During your relationship, he was so kind and considerate to you, and he never failed to make you laugh. You told Kenma how he even said that despite going to different schools, there was no one else he'd rather be that: that apparently didn’t stop him from hooking up with another girl.

After you went silent, Kenma found that you were finished. Despite only thinking of you as ‘that other girl in his class that was dating a volleyball player Kuroo hated’ until recently, seeing you cry and pour your heart out gave him a strange, internal attachment to you.

“Do you wanna get out of here?” Kenma asked suddenly, turning to you and planting a hand on the floor, learning towards you ever so slightly. You blinked.

“What?” Surprised by his own outburst, Kenma decided to roll with it.

“There’s an arcade a few blocks down… sometimes when I get upset, I go there and it always cheers me up?” To be perfectly honest, Kenma wasn’t really expecting you to say yes. He expected you to brush him off, say you were feeling better and ready to go home. 

Kenma himself didn’t know why he asked, he usually didn’t really like spended excess time with people he didn’t know that well, but subconsciously, there was a part of him that wanted to help.

“Oh, uhm, yeah! Sure, why not?” You metally cursed yourself for your stuttering, it was bad enough you were info-dumping and completely oversharing, you didn’t want Kenma to think you were that weak. You sniffled again, realization dawning on you.

“We gotta find a way out of here first, thought.” You said. Kenma cringed. 

***

Long story short, you and Kenma managed to escape the table without anyone seeing you. You were extremely thankful, as it would have been very awkward if someone saw the two of you crawling out from under a table. 

Getting outside was another thing, thought. Kuroo and the beer pong table were still very much blocking the way out, and there was always the risk of bumping into Daishou again. After a bit of asking around, you found out that there was a backdoor in the kitchen, so you and Kenma were able to make your escape. 

Now you were playing away to your hearts’ content to some random racing game at an arcade. You both were playing side-by-side, versing each other. To no one’s surprise, Kenma was beating you. Deep down, though, Kenma was a little impressed you were able to keep up with him so well, being a religious player of Mario Kart himself and all. 

You both fleeted from game to game, playing almost every game available from shooting games to claw machines to even a Space Invaders-esque game. You had managed to earn a good amount of tickets, all thanks to Kenma’s membership card and the loose tokens he found in his wallet.

Eventually, you had played until the arcade was empty and one of the employees came up to you to tell you they were closed. They did mention that you could still buy some prizes if you wanted to, to which Kenma turned to you.

“Do you want to?” 

Over the time you had spent playing games together, you had gotten to know Kenma better than just ‘the quiet boy in your class’ in between passing conversations and empty, teasing threats, some of your favorites had been: I will steal your kneecaps and If you play with that character you don’t deserve rights.

“Yeah, sure!” You replied, a genuine smile crossed your face. 

In the end, you had gotten a keychain with a mini funko character on it and Kenma settled on a cute sticker that, with much encouragement from you, he stuck on the case of his PSP.

After exiting the arcade, Kenma took a moment to glance over at you. The empty street illuminated by semi-faulty lampposts, and he found it showed your face more clearly than all the neon lights of the arcade. Your tears dried up, although there were still hints of red in splotches on your face. 

As he watched you talk excitedly about your new keychain, he couldn’t help but feel a strange way, an unfamiliar feeling he had never felt before. It was warm in a way, something akin to stepping home for the first time after being away for so long. It was weird, in all the years he had known you, or been partnered up with you for whatever, he had never thought of you as anything other than a random classmate. However, after everything you had both gone through together that night, something new was forming.

Little did Kenma know, you were thinking the same. You noticed the little things about him; you thought back to how his nose would scrunch when he would mess up in a game or you would surpass him in something, or how his eyes lit up and almost sparkled ever so slightly when he was picking out stickers. Now that you were outside, you could see how his dyed hair swayed gently in the crisp November wind, or how his eyes would somewhat crinkle as he laughed when you made a joke.

After a few moments of silence, you spoke up. 

“Hey, so, I didn’t really get to eat at the party… Do you maybe wanna get something to eat nearby?” You asked, turning your head to Kenma. Realizing how that sounded like you were asking him on a date, you quickly stuttered out “Of course, you don’t have to! We can just get a small snack or, or maybe we don’t have to get anything!” You laughed awkwardly as Kenma showed no obvious emotions, however his eyes were slightly widened and his cheeks growing more red, but you chalked that up to the colder weather and surprise. 

Kenma suddenly remembered how he didn’t get a chance to eat as well, but in all the games you guys were playing, he didn’t get a chance to feel hungry. Realizing he had not responded, he quickly thought of a place to get food, his mind immediately wandering to 7/11.

“Oh yeah, sure. There’s a 7/11 down the street, if you want?” He said, and you were off.

***

Sitting in the 7/11 with Kenma under the fluorescent lights was oddly comforting. You were happily eating your warm soba noodles (topped with tempura) as Kenma ate his apple pastry (having already eaten half of an egg salad sandwich and wrapping the rest for later) as you engaged in mindless conversation, Kenma periodically pulling out his PSP to either play or check on things. 

During some random conversation about a new game Kenma was playing, you noticed him occasionally glancing behind you. Eventually, you looked behind you to see what looked like a newly installed slushie machine, touchscreen and all. Realizing Kenma wouldn’t speak up about it, you decided to take charge.

“Do you wanna get slushies?” You said with a grin. Kenma looked surprised for a second before lightly laughing.

“Sure.”

Over the machine, you tapped the screen to get a strawberry lemonade slushie, while Kenma opted for cherry one.

Slushies didn’t exactly pair well with warm soba, but tonight was apparently a night full of surprise, what with finding out about your boyfriend (ex, you reminded yourself), not to mention these spontaneous adventures with a random boy who was, you thought, not so random anymore.

“Wanna have a competition?” Kenma’s voice interrupted your train of thought, “Let’s see who can drink theirs the fastest.” You grinned.

“You’re on!”

After Kenma counted down, you both tried to down your slushie. Halfway through, though, you had to stop.

“Ah! Brainfreeze!” You exclaimed, clutching your head with one hand. Kenma also stopped drinking and laughed, “My head feels so numb, argh!” You hummed. “At least now I won’t think of Daishou anymore… My brain feels like it’s pounding like, like it’s having a rave or something!” It was getting late, meaning you were dangerously close to your stage of drowsiness that caused you to infodump like crazy. Kenma’s smile dropped every so slightly. 

“Hey, uhm,” he looked as though he was looking for the right words to say, “I’m really sorry about what happened, uh,” he scratched the back of his head nervously, “Sorry, I’m not great at… feelings… but, if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here.” 

You blinked for a second before smiling. 

“Thanks, Kenma.”

As you were finishing up the rest of your slushie, you turned to Kenma.

“Hey, uhm, I know this is pretty random but do you want to be my partner for the project we’re doing in science?” Kenma looked up from his PSP and stared at you, as if trying to remember what you were talking about, “The one about incomplete dominance and sex-linked traits? The teacher said you had to find a partner of the opposite gender so you could create a ‘hypothetical baby’, which, honestly, I find kinda dumb… Like, if the baby’s just hypothetical, then you could partner up with anyone, right? It’s not just me that feels that way?” 

Kenma remembered what project you were talking about, but he really enjoyed when you would continue on these rants. Being one to not talk that much, he liked how you were able to fill in the silence, although the times when you would be eating and he would be playing in silence were not as awkward as he thought, they weren’t awkward at all. 

“So… Do you want to pair up?” Kenma flushed, realizing he was mindlessly listening to you talk.

“Oh, uhm, yeah, sure.” You beamed.

bonus: you did your project on incomplete dominance and sex-linked traits and learned about the wonders of co-dominance in blood types. also kuroo was very worried about kenma leaving and thought he got kidnapped by a van that said ‘free games’ but it was all cool when he learnt kenma left with a girl ;)