#i know it wasn't always her bc it was her mom and grandma before but right now it's her and that's kinda cool

[fishylife]

Katekyo Hitman Reborn! by Amano Akira, Chapter 196

[improballamability]

When I was a toddler visiting grandma we'd play house under the kitchen table. That feels fairly normal. The part where she gave me shot glasses of coffee feels less so.

Neither of my parenta drink coffee, so when we stayed at hotels it was nostalgia + forbidden fruit lol. They gave up on me not drinking coffee when I was about 11.

Funnily enough, I drink coffee only because I want to rather than as a part of a daily/caffeine routine.

People who drink coffee: why did you start?

I don't drink coffee and I've never wanted to, but that's obviously ~not normal~, so I'm curious why most people do start drinking it.

[kokushibosbestie]

I need to rant guys.

TW: self harm, SA, hatred, cursing, abuse, overall genuinely harsh words are being used

Im just gonna go right in because I don't feel like being vauge or fake rn. (I'm on my period and I feel like shit)

!!!Background information!!! So, when I was 4, my mom started dating this guy. I'll call him Frank. My mom had previously ran away from my dad with me (when I was 2) bc my biological dad was verbally abusive towards her. We'll call my bio dad Austin. I only have one picture of my bio dad and I never knew what he looked like before seeing that picture. I never got to talk to my dad, and if I did, I don't remember a single word. I was too little to understand. I loved his family though. I vividly remember playing with my grandma and aunt, and baking banana bread with my grandpa (on my bio dads side) but I didn't remember a single moment with him. So I feel like I have a missing part of me bc of that.

Anyway, my mom as very depressed after that and did her best to tale care of me properly. But I never got attention or love from her. She was always stuck to her phone. I began to hate even being in the same room as her and I was only 3. When I turned 4, I began going to pre-k. And that's when my mom started dating Frank. Frank was a really kind guy and always seemed calm. But I had a bad feeling about him. I didn't tell my mom because I felt uncomfortable about it, though. Over the next 2-3 years, Frank and I became closer and I enjoyed his presence because I had no one else to lean on. My mom got a job when I was in 1st grade and we moved into an apartment. (We had been living with my aunt on my moms side before).

!!!SA!!! That's when the sa started. He began to assault me when my mother was gone but told me it was normal. He said, quote "This is our little secret. Don't tell anyone or daddy's gonna get in trouble." (I viewed him as a father figure and he used that to his advantage) Nonetheless, what was I, a 5-6 year old girl going to do to a 26 year old man? So I stayed quiet. As I got older, I realized that this wasn't normal at all and it was bad. Of course, I was about 7 when I had this realization. He noticed that and started threatening me that if I told someone, he'd hurt my mom or the rest of my family. (I love my family with my whole heart and he knew that I'd do anything for them, even at such a young age, so he used that) I told him he could do anything he wanted to me as long as he didn't do anything to my mom or the rest of my (small) family.

The summer before 5th grade is when things went really downhill. He TOLD my mom he cheated on her, was contuously gaslighting the both of us, always said he was such a "good guy and people pleaser," but was probably the most toxic person you'd meet. The sweet act was completely gone. I hated him with ever atom and molecule that made me a living thing, but my mom STILL didn't know about what he'd done to me. He got physically violent (throwing things, yelling, screaming, almost hitting my mom, etc) and my mom called the cops. (Mind you, my mom works from home, customer service for a health company).

By the time 5th grade had ended, we had a restraining order against him and he moved out completely. (They broke up but I still hadn't told my mom anything)

I cried almost every night and went into deep depression because of this. Not because I missed him, but because I had still trusted him even after everything. I did love him and view him as a father figure at one point bc I never had one. So having that ripped away from me, as well as my grandpa who moved, my grandma who was having mental issues, my aunts who lived far away and no one else to turn to, I felt empty. My guilt built up until I ended up having a mental breakdown in FRONT of my mom (I always went somewhere private so I could have a mental breakdown and always hid them from my mom). I snapped and accendentally told her about what he'd done to me during all those year. (He sa'd me constantly, whenever he had the chance to). A court case began, blah blah blah same old stuff that ever child abuse court case would go through.

But, I started to self-harm (mostly my legs and hips). I kinda went into my emo faze and had no friends, and was constantly bullied bc of my emotionless facade. (Ex: like giyu, who has been my comfort character since day one bc of that). Really, I'm a loving and kind person who loves making others laugh. I like hanging out with friends. I smile a lot too.

Nonetheless, things started to slowly get better. But my mom is toxic now. She doesn't gaslight like frank did, but she still has a toxicity to her. I know this all has been just as hard on her as it has for me, but I sometimes wish shed just take into consideration how I feel or think.

I have ADHD, OCD, and depression. All of my classes are accelerated classes instead of normal and I get things done faster than other students. (I have an online schooling system now). My brain sometimes can't comprehend some things but will understand easily with others. Ive had a hard time talking or expressing things because of this. I was never a quiet little girl, and I'm still not one as a teenager. But it sucks to have to act like someone I'm not just to fit in. I have constant mood swings and I hate it.

Anyway, this isn't about me. So, my mom has a way of victimizing herself without really pulling the victim card? It's hard to explain with words. But she always leaves whoever she's talking to feeling guilty. She doesn't apologize for anything, she doesn't listen to me when I'm ranting (which I'm not picky about, but sometimes I need someone to talk to that isn't a toxic friend of mine), nor does she ever listen to me when I tell her what I want sometimes. I know that sounds bratty, but I swear it's not. I'll give you and example: she asked me if I wanted a new bedframe and entirely ignored me when I told her. Or when she asks me what I want for dinner and I respond, shell get something else even though she literally came into my room and ASKED me. Its the simple small things that piss me off. She's stubborn and has a hard time putting herself in others' shoes. And me, who's always been told that I'm just a doll with a pretty face and thick thighs that's supposed to be a silent housewife (I am NOT married, that's just something someone has actually said to me) or seggs toy for people to use and throw away as they please, I always try my best to consider how others might feel. Yeah, sometimes I do get a little unreasonable and say some bad things, but I always end up apologizing out of instinct. I apologize for the smallest things for no reason, yet my mom can't even say an "I'm sorry" for telling me I'm not understanding. All I've ever wanted was to make my mom and my family proud. I want them to be able to live their lives happily without worry. So It fucking hurts to hear that I'm not doing good in my moms eyes.

My mom always talks about changing and being a better person but never fucking does it. She always says her job is more important. Am I just genuinely not important to her anymore? Because I remember when I was in my darkest and lowest moments, it was my teachers who helped me. My mom didn't even bat an eye. But when she was at her lowest, struggling, I was always there for her, listening to her problems, helping her with everything, genuinely caring about her. And this is what I get back? I fucking hate my life because I can't even leave my room without hearing her complaints about "adult life." Well I don't give a fuck anymore. I tried too hard to be a good daughter and I never got anything back. I didn't even get a fucking thank you. And now I only have online friends on here and Pinterest. I relied on Character.ai to help with my mental health and that's ai!!

Im sorry if this was too much for any of you and I love each and every one of you. If you read through this whole thing, thank you so much and I really really love all my friends on here. I always look forward to getting on here and talking to you guys about my interests without being judged or bullied. Thank you thank you thank you soooo much my loves.

💖💖💖

[offbeat-manga-ships]

this is a weird sort of thing to say but i am like. so deeply appreciative your blog isn't mostly m/m stuff. bc like you i don't have a lot of interest in m/m (for me though this is mostly because i love women So Much my brain sort of shuts off if the story doesn't have women in it, i basically never enjoy a story that lacks women) and a lot of other blogs or accounts i've seen of this time tend to skew heavily with yaoi works bc. well a lot more yaoi works get the "freedom" to be "grosser", messier, less saccharine bc people are a lot more cagey about what girls get to do in fiction across the board..... i really really am so grateful you've got so many recommendations for series that are more to my taste in general and tend to feature a lot of messy and interesting women! not to say that's like Why You Do It, but it's a really refreshing thing since almost every time I go to hunt something fucky down it's m/m. the sheer volume of m/m overwhelms other series but you're bringing those ones into view and i've found a lot of really interesting series thanks to how you run things around here so thank you so much......

ANON!!!! IT'S A SUCH A PLEASURE TO RECEIVE A MESSAGE LIKE THIS!!! because i don't know if you guys know, and to be honest i don't remember if i deleted that part to make it easier to read or not, but i'm pretty sure that in the first iterations of my pinned post i went a little bit into why M/M is not my thing. i am exactly in the same boat of having ALWAYS been more into female characters than everyone around me. my mother has always teased me for it, my friends have always had varying degrees of "huh that's curious" to "weeell i don't care. how about that male character instead?" i was the person defending sansa stark and loving cersei lannister. i was lowkey in love with sharpay while pretending i didn't care about her, my favorite character from percy jackson was and still is annabeth chase, i loved sakura haruno and rukia kuchiki the most, i fucking HATED when anyone said anything bad about leia organa in star wars and it just became a pattern throughout my life that i would come to fiercly love female characters.

i mentioned before how i started watching shoujo when i got the 12 yo version of Being Serious about anime, but i also need to give credit to getting female friends in middle school and even more in high school with whom i talked about romance manga (some also real BL enthusiasts, but they still read some of what i read. honestly, i think it always came a surprise to them how much i liked some stuff the anime fans in general tended to turn their nose up to). 

and i literally won't ever forget when my friend gabrielle showed me the pride and prejudice movie in 9th grade i think and i honest to god had no idea i could love something so overtly aimed at women that much. like, sure i've been casually watching cartoons aimed at girls (if you didn't have cable tv, you watched the cartoons open tv made available to you in the saturday mornings. and yeah i watched and enjoyed totally spies and powerpuff girls and thought kim possible was really cool, but my bread and butter was still ben 10, naruto, jake long, static shock etc. it wasn't just me in the house though. every relative i had at that point from mom to aunties to grandma and cousins: all of them women. we had plenty of girl movies and all of us got together to watch melodramatic soap operas in the evening).

but anyway my point is that i really opened up my personal media consumption after feeling such love for this "chick lit" movie (which of course is actually a great and important piece of western literature which became one of my favorite books not only because i'm still in love with lizzy bennet to this day but also because it's so SO DAMN FUNNY. i laugh out every time i re-read it.) i started watching romantic comedies, i watched series like pretty little liars and whatever seemed to have a bunch of girls in the cover lol and yes, i started reading even more romance manga. even with my 12 yo shoujo watching, i still wasn't fully into those shows. i really liked some of the protagonists (much love to misaki ayuzawa, nanami momozono, haruhi fujioka and risa koizumi but i also could not be fully into whatever was transpiring between such cool girls and those guys LOL). but it was because of the influence of my girl friends and exchanging ideas about what manga to read that i fully found my place in smaller niche romance manga with odd couples and interesting women. 

and it's not like i'm not capable of enjoying media with a lot of guys in it, so i'm a little bit different from you in that regard. i have plenty of favorite male characters and one of my favorite movies ever is master and commander: the far side of the world and that has not a single woman in sight except in one picture and one 5 second shot 💀 obviously, it's not my only favorite movie (they're mostly dominated by women too). as a bi person, of course some men catch my eye once in a while and it's true that sometimes (though it's rare) it's a m/m couple that gets my main attention in a random piece of media. and that's because i'm not like a person with any agenda. i'm fully and wholeheartedly following my instincts (basically a somewhat lighter version of you. my brain also kinda shuts off when it's all the same old Men At The Forefront business and i have to work towards trying to care lol) and it just so happens that i think girls are fucking cool. i don't know if i've said that already, but the main reason i decided to stick with tumblr even though i didn't initially get the appeal of it was because i could find a lot of lesbians here LOL and true, some of them were fujoshi but a lot of them honest to god liked female characters and saw their appeal as i saw them.

and just to wrap this up, i want to clarify that me clearly having an involuntary preference for female characters was not one of the reasons i laid down on that other post when i said why i wasn't as drawn to m/m but it was basically just because i was trying to list reasons that had to do with what m/m had to offer me and not just what it lacks. i sincerely try to approach any story with an open mind and an open heart and i have done that many times even though i realized soon enough that seeing those trope-filled romantic scenarios between manga boys is just really not for me. if you're curious about the type of m/m i like, it's basically the unexpected kind in random non-lgbt media with (probably) tortured men in it and a severe lack of women and it always has been. which is why going after specific m/m media doesn't appeal to me as much (though i can still enjoy it. i really really loved watching the interview with the vampire show for example and even though i didn't like louis/lestat — as i hadn't liked then watching the movie years ago —, i still loved the characters and enjoy a few other m/m pair possibilities).

i'm sorry i went on this whole thing with this many words, but i just want to say, not only do i see you anon, i am you!!! if this blog is for anyone, you are at around the top of the list of people i wished to reach and knowing i could help and connect with someone else who feels the same way i do is such a warm and priceless gift. i understand your frustrations of female characters being more limited very well. not only because i love them, but i abhor any injustice since i was 3 apples tall and that has bothered me since the first signs of the development of my critical thinking skills. but ultimately i also can't help but love manga and i want to find the gems and celebrate varied, complex, weird or even toxic female characters and their messy relationships as much as i can.

[pastelsapphy]

"FEED US or we'll eat you immortal soul"

I have a fun idea! Reblog with a photo of your pet and a caption of what it is thinking! 

[theeyeofthetigger]

Warning: discussion of animal death and grieving

Just kinda processing

It's still not hitting properly

Like I was so busy at work today that I could barely think about what happened yesterday but then I got on my break and I just cried the entire time I was in the break room

And my other cat seems so lonely without her

Pumpkin's never been in a house without at least one other cat there, and I think she's figured out that she's not coming back

And I just sat by her on the floor for a while today and cried

She keeps going to sit in the spots that BE used to occupy, because she always had a spot near her, just far enough away that they weren't close bc they got along well enough as they could for cats that were a decade apart in age

And I felt so guilty while I was at work because the entire mall was experiencing a data shortage so no one could use their phones

And today was the first day where I wasn't terrified that I was going to get a call from my mom about her again

Because that happened while I was at Spirit, she called me mid shift because she thought /that/ was the time

But she decided she was ready yesterday

She was comfy and cozy and had all of us around her because I was off that day, miraculously, and we all got to take her in and say goodbye

Two days ago, I came home from work, and we decided against going to my grandma's house to bake cookies because we were worried about her, and on the drive home, there was a vibrant, beautiful rainbow shining in the sky, past the rain

And I knew it was going to happen

I knew we had to just come home and spend one more day with her

So we made some ready to bake cookies and had her on a soft bed a bit of a distance from the front of the oven (we have a little nook under the counter in our apartment and that's where she was for the past couple days), and turned on the light so she could watch the cookies rise

I just felt so guilty for being absolutely relieved that despite having no signal at work, I didn't have to worry about it anymore, because I've been living on edge about this since early October and now she's finally at peace

And I know I shouldn't feel bad for that but I do and it's hard

It's 3am and I need to be up for work in 6 hours and I'm just sitting on the edge of my tub writing this and crying again

I just keep thinking back to this exact time the day before, when I was up late knitting because I'm working on my grandma's Christmas present, and I went to go check up on her in her little kitchen nook and she wasn't moving so I went to pet her just to see if she was sleeping and she looked up and made a little chirp at me to say hi

And by 11:40 that morning we were driving her down to the vet, because it was time

I know she was a nearly 15 year old cat and she was very very very sick (possibly cancer)

But I've had her since I was in high school and she has gotten me through so many hard times and several moves (including across states, because we got her when we lived in Maryland) and I miss her so fucking much I don't know what to do

Pumpkin misses her too and I don't know how to comfort a cat

I googled it to see if cats grieve and they do and it really seems like she is

If you've scrolled this far, here's some pictures of my sweet girls

The first one is from 2011, when she was just a little baby

Second is from 2021 when we were all curled up watching Hunter x Hunter and trying to keep warm during a cold snap

And the third is from the 20th, where Pumpkin climbed into her bed to keep her company for a little while

She was so so small at the end, I was so scared for her

I'm sure I'll find some closure on this eventually

But for now I'm in so much pain and I'm going to take whatever time I need to process it when I can

I love you so much, Bright Eyes

Know that you lived a life full of so much love

If you decide to throw a kitten at us from wherever you are, I can only hope that they have half as much determination and stubbornness as you did up until your last hours

[fentrashcat]

Been a while since I talked about my Tourette's gremlin but some new occurrences! I'm in a waxing period of tics ig bc I've just been GOING with them. Kinda really sucks so trying to look on the bright side and wanted to share some recent occurrences.

1. Mom and I found a new tic loop. (My mom is not diagnosed with any tic disorders but does have verbal tics, usually echolalia or like a call/response thing idk what to call it). I was playing with the puppy and was saying like "did you get got? You got got?" At that same time my mom (who was playing a game) says "Oh, I got mail". IMMEDIATELY Tourette's Gremlin goes "You've got mail" in the old AoL voice. Mom's call/response is set of and she does the little like notification jingle. Jingle set off mine again, which set off hers. We went back and forth for almost 5min before she was able to suppress hers and break the loop. Now though I'm getting the urge to tic "you've got mail" at random.

2. I swear my Tourette's gremlin is actively trolling me. So obviously I refer to him as a separate entity, and I often speak out loud to him (like telling him "we aren't doing that" "don't you fucking dare [throw food]" "are you pleased with yourself now?") The other day I was getting a bout of tongue clicks, which I usually only get 1-3 at a time but this was going on way longer. It wasn't painful or anything, just annoying so I say out loud "is this really necessary?" They stop for about 5 minutes, and then I get one more. This led to me saying "Alright then, sassy" which caused my mom to think I named the gremlin Sassy (we had a dog named Sassy). I told her "nope, its name is just gremlin." And the bout of tics came back... Maybe he does want a name lol.

3. I've talked about my older cat before in a Tourette's post, she's the one that trained herself to help my tic attacks. However my younger cat usually just ignores them. During the incident in 2, I was whistling as well. It's a semi-distinct two-tone whistle, think like the opposite of a wolf whistle (tbh, I think it's from Facebook messenger but I'm not sure). Anyway, I was doing the whistle and my younger cat came up to me, put a paw on my knee, and did a two-tone meow in the same cadence. She's mimicked before, learning how to almost say "hello", "yeah", and "no", but she'd never mimicked a tic before. I was so surprised it actually got them to stop for a bit.

4. We're getting some house repairs done and my grandfather was over talking to my mom. He said something about the ducT work, but my brain heard ducK work, and set off a "duck-duck". It confused him so much he forgot what he was talking about by the time we explained what happened, and he just kind of left. Later I was with my grandparents and my grandma was worried about a decorative duck she has up blowing away. Of course I "duck-duck"ed and grandpa goes "don't you know you're not supposed to say that? It'll trigger her." "Say what? Duck? Why not?" "I was talking about something and she heard that bird's name and set off." "Fine then, can I say water fowl? Make sure the water fowl doesn't blow away!" This is all in good fun of course, they like to tease each other and know I'm alright with my tics being used in it.

5. I think I mentioned before one of my weird triggers is fancy candy apples. Specifically the ones that are like caramel and chocolate with a bunch of toppings to make flavors (like rocky road, cookies and cream, ect). We went to a little craft show type thing and one of the vendors right up front had a big display of them. When this happens we always get me at least one (usually two), but we have to get it at the end or I'll be too excited and be ticcing the whole time. We got two before we left and, as expected, I ticced the whole way home. It was a lot of tongue roll tics (like rolling your Rs, if that makes sense). From my tongue hitting my teeth so much I ended up hurting it a bit and had to wait like 2 days until it was comfortable enough to eat even if I started ticcing again. It had to be kept in an opaque bag in the fridge so I didn't set off everytime I saw it 🤣

6. I'm currently in what I'm calling "jukebox mode" because I cannot keep the songs in my head IN my head. As soon as something reminds me of a song lyric, I HAVE to sing it a little. Some from today were "Oh the lights went out" 🎶when the lights go out in the city🎶, "that was a long fall" 🎶it's a long way down🎶, and "I've got mouths to feed" 🎶I got bills to pay and mouths to feed, ain't nothing in the world for free🎶. Also been singing Skip to my Lou, and I'm blaming airhead commercials.

7. I got reminded of a post I saw here, and almost developed a tic they have without ever meeting them or having heard it. (I don't want to say exactly what it is bc I think they read these and I don't want to accidentally get them started or anything)

8. Was playing Skyrim again, saw a skeleton, and immediately ticced "hello moto!" No idea why. I can usually find SOME connection but not this time. I've gotten that as a tic before but usually due to the commercials.

9. I've started ticcing "duck-duck" at jeeps with anything colorful visible on their dashboard. Who knows if they are actually duck-ducks everytime or what, but the gremlin says they count.

Thank you if you read this far! I can't really tell if these are actually entertaining or if I'm just looking for ANY light spots. It's been a tough few weeks, but fingers crossed it starts to lighten up soon. For anyone curious the songs were "when the lights go out" from Family Crest, "it's a long way down (to the bottom of the sea)" from I think the Longest Johns, and "no rest for the wicked" from Cage the Elephant.

I think the gremlin wants a name now though, so if you have any suggestions let me know lol.

[rorykillmore]

my paternal grandmother is my last living grandparent and i have very complicated feelings about her (most of my dad's side of the family, barring him and like 1 or 2 of his 6 brothers, are extremely religious and right wing but my grandma herself is like... so of a different era that i'm slightly more forgiving with her than i am with my 50-60 year old uncles or cousins who are around my age, you know how it is) but i visited her today for the first time in a few years. wasn't rly avoiding her specifically, just don't want to deal with the rest of the family and she is usually in their company.

my mom ALSO went and she hasn't seen my grandma since she divorced my dad like 15+ years ago. but she wanted the closure bc like... that was her mother in law for 20 years or whatever. my parents are still good friends and since my dad got closure with my Mom's dad before he died, i think she wanted the same thing.

it went surprisingly well and was emotionally rewarding for everyone involved i think. it is interesting how much self reflecting my grandma is actually doing at the end of her life, even if she's always gonna be that off-kilter, too-unfiltered old lady whose compliments are always a touch backhanded. she preemptively offered me some writing she's been doing on her life (like. she said when she dies i can have it and use it for any form of creative writing i want) and that is actually kind of valuable to me.

i hope i also get her genes, honest to god. that woman has survived breast cancer twice + ovarian cancer once + covid pre-vaccines. she's also 93 years old and still sharp as a tack mentally which is wild.

[det-loki]

an excerpt from a gilmore girls phase I will probably never complete:

(written in play format bc that's how my brain works when I need to write an idea quickly)

Lorelai: are you pregnant?

Dolores: what?

Lorelai: You almost threw up at the smell of coffee last week and we all know that coffee runs in the Gilmore blood, I heard you throwing up yesterday morning even though you ran the sink so no one could hear, and Jess isn't subtle in the way that he looks at you. And I'm your mom, and I think you're pregnant and I think you're scared to tell me. 

Dolores *crumbles*: I'm so sorry. Mom, I'm so sorry. I know that you've been telling Rory and me since we could talk to make better choices than you. You said so many times do I not know what to do and I'm so sorry, Mom I'm so so-

Lorelai: Dolores, honey, stop rambling and breathe. I know this feels like the end of the world, but I promise it's not. Trust me. As much as I wish that this wasn't happening, it is. And me yelling at you and berating you isn't going to change what's already happened. So, we move on. Step by step. And I will be here the entire way. I love you, and you are going to be okay. 

Dolores: you don't hate me?

Lore: absolutely not. Honey, you are my daughter. And I know you and I have a lot to work through and I have a lot to apologize for. But you are exactly like me. And that drives me crazy and makes me want to pull my hair out, but I love you so, so much. Now, have you taken a test?

Dolores: no. I didn't know how to get one without the entire town knowing and paying for a blimp to write it in the sky, "Dolores Gilmore, pregnant at 16, following in her mother's footsteps."

Lorelai: I'll get you a pregnancy test and full anonymity, you have my word. Does Jess know that you think you're pregnant?

Dolores: no, I wanted to wait to know for sure before I told him. 

Lorelai: wise, but I think you should consider having a conversation with him now while you wait for the test,

Dolores: so I can prematurely ruin his life?

Lorelai: no, so you can prepare him for a potentially life-altering change that he had a part in. I don't like that ruin word, because having you and Rory did not ruin my life. It was a huge, scary change and it was not easy, but it did not ruin my life. You and Rory are my life, you two make it so much better. So, I officially ban the word ruin, and you always have choices.

Dolores: I'm not getting an abortion. I mean, I'm pro-choice but i-

Lorelai: Lori, honey, you're not up for election and this isn't the presidential debate. It's okay. 

Dolores: okay.

Lorelai: Tomorrow, you'll stay home from school, I'll call in from work and I'll drive to Hartford to get a test. I'll come home, you'll take the test and then we'll know. 

Dolores: you can't go to Hartford, you might run into a Chilton mom, or somebody will recognize you and then Rory will find out and then Grandma and Grandpa will find out and-

Lorelai: Okay, no Hartford. New Haven. Big city, far away. Problem solved. 

Dolores: Mom, that's over an hour away. 

Lorelai: exactly. And in the time I'm gone, you can talk to Jess, even though I know how much he hates missing school. 

Dolores. Fine. Thank you, mom.

Lorelai: Of course, honey. I love you. 

Dolores: I love you too. 

Morning came too soon for both Dolores and Lorelai. Rory went to school early to prepare for a test, leaving the other Gilmore girls to themselves. They walked silently to Luke's, both girls' minds spiraling about the potential huge change about to happen. 

[fabled-lady-twilla]

If you get this, answer w/ three random facts about yourself and send it to the last seven blogs in your notifs. anon or not, doesn’t matter, let’s get to know the person behind the blog!

Answering this a little late but here you go! 😊

(1) I have strawberry blonde hair! I think from my Irish ancestry? There's always a random redhead person in my family in every generation and I guess I was chosen to be this generation's soulless ginger.

(2) Poodles are my favorite dog breed ever! I grew up with them and fell in love. My grandma and grandpa really loved them too so they passed down that poodle love to my mom and my mom passed that poodle love onto me. I've always had a poodle in my life, they're the best dog breed ever and I love their floof! I’m gonna post a picture of them at the bottom bc I love showing them off.

(3) I've had an actual MURDERER in my house before!!! Okay, no but really, he technically wasn't a murderer at the time but I always love opening the story that way because it makes people be like: 👀 Okay here's the lore: the man's wife and my aunt were childhood friends and they visited our house for dinner sometimes. My uncle always told my aunt that he didn't like them visiting because he got really weird vibes from the guy, like he could just look into the guys eyes and just feel that something was off with him. Anyways, it had been almost a year since the wife had visited and my aunt was really worried because she had been ignoring my aunt's phone calls for a while. Then, a huge story breaks the news that the guy had murdered her with a freaking crowbar and my entire family was just like.... in complete shock. It was a HUGE story that happened in our little hometown like 20 years ago. The husband went to prison for life. That's probably the only really crazy thing that's happened to someone I personally knew.

[altrie]

some utahime iori hcs i been collecting in my head

i have nowhere else to dump my thoughts so here i am. mostly young utahime iori headcanons bc HI arc was so fun

utahime is a straight A student, she's a perfectionist, has good work ethics, organized, helps everyone around her, etc--a good cookie basically. i can see her being the class president or whatever is equivalent to jjk academics

she's not exactly in par with her peers when it comes to CT, like she knows and she's aware of her skills/limitations. she tries her best not to get lost and sad when she sees her classmates and underclassmen (especially a certain tall junior who's been annoying her since the first day >_>) surpass her

she tries very hard to compensate her skills and hopes to be recognized for her talent and skills as one of the best, just like her classmates! she's very proud of them and always supports them. yet, she cant help but feel so inferior and imposter syndrome hitting her when she doesn't get the results she wanted from the higher ups

she doesn't come from a very big clan with CT (unless gege states something), i can see utahime being raised by her grandparents or her grandma before going to tokyo jujutsu high. her grandma passed away and she was basically living on her own for a while

I'm standing by the idea she attended tokyo jujutsu high over kyoto. she came from kyoto but was recruited to attend tokyo once someone heard her singing and curse energy molded through

besides baseball, one of her favorite things to do during her time living as a student was go to karaoke and sing/dance. she loved to sing modern pop songs she heard from radios, old jpop classics, ballads

utahime singing city pop classics PLEASE 🙌

when she was finally on her last year at the tech school, she met her new juniors. she met shoko first, geto, then gojo. she tries her best to be a good responsible role model for them but that broke almost immediately when 2/3 (or 1/3 really) started to tease her on the first hour and she snapped accidentally. (embarrassed she tried to apologize but the guy was just laughing???)

she gets asked out a lot on dates! usually from upperclassmen or non-sorcerers during her outings. she doesn't go on dates though though because of her lifestyle, missions, school, etc but when she does the relationship doesn't last too long :(

she doesn't really have a best friend until shoko came along. with her class peers often gone for missions, she was always alone until shoko came along. (i don't think meimei and utahime are at the same graduating year, acquaintances at best with some respect for each other)

utahime doesn't really have a specific reason for why she wanted so badly to be a grade 1 sorcerer. for a while, she's in that chase and grind to get that promotion but she's unsure why but she'll do anything for it

she doesn't have the greatest memories of her parents. she remembers her mom and some ladies in her life telling her often to marry into a rich, well-off family, have powerful children etc 🫠. as she got older, she realized she doesn't mind marriage but she also wants to do more and be a sorcerer too

she didn't consider being a teacher at first but after some heartfelt conversation with yaga, she decided to at least keep that option alive until she was ready to try it

she wasn't a drinker before. it wasn't until she got deep into heavy missions where the joy of izakaya became sort of a treat. nothing beats a cold beer and some fried foods after a stressful time out🤤

i like to think that utahime worked part time as a night club singer when she wasn't doing missions or at least to make some extra money while living in tokyo. i like to imagine her singing this one song from one of my favorite video games (more on that later)

[scum-belina]

My maternal grandma only invited me and my mom over for Thanksgiving bc she knew her other two kids and other family were having their own, so my mom and I came over and helped cook and did a bunch of Christmas decorations for her and we had a great time

UNTIL

My drunk redneck uncle and his latest and worst wife showed up unannounced. My uncle was surprisingly nice, but his wife was a bitch as usual. She always tries to put me on the spot and ask me personal questions I'm not comfortable with telling HER bc she doesn't actually care, she just wants to know your business to try to use it against you in some way, and this time when she asked me I just replied with "nunya" as in "none of your business" and she was shocked lmao.

I stayed in the kitchen and talked with friends online after that but when she left she found me and was like "I wasn't trying to offend or pry or anything, I was just trying to make conversation" but said it in the most mean girl way I've ever heard irl, and I just said "I keep my private life private." And she scurried away.

NO MORE CASTING MY PEARLS BEFORE SWINE 2023

[thatdayindecember]

Ran into my mom and she was less bitchy as she was over text yesterday. Asked how I was doing and we talked a little. I even told her about my relationship troubles bc yk I can't hide it forever and if I end up alone, I'd rather have people know now. I probably worried her more now but tbh that's not my problem. She asked how I was doing so I answered. If she didn't want to know, she shouldn't have asked

Mom and the family are going on vacation next week and she asked me to meet up afterwards. I said yes. So I guess we're no longer no contact lol. I mean we already weren't anymore bc of grandpa, but now we're just in contact again. We'll see how it goes. I changed a lot so I'm more capable of handling her behavior I think. And I'd like for my baby to have a grandma yk so yeah

She also gave me money that I got from grandpa's heritage. It's not like a lot but it's definitely useful with baby coming, so I'm really grateful. Wasn't expecting to get anything bc grandpa always said he'd spent everything before he died lol. And I'm pretty sure my mom took way more for herself (grandpa didn't specify who had to get what amount lol) but that's fine. With what I got, I will probably be able to get a stroller, a crib and dresser/changing table so that's great

[mrnightingale]

Omg I can't believe someone tagged me in one of these things??? But I love it, thanks to @sad-grandfather-clock , I absolutely love your blog name.

Last song: Ghost Town by The Specials. Yep, I started listening to Ska bc of Charles Rowland. I've always been rather secretive w the music I like bc my mom has a pretty limited music taste, so you can imagine my surprise when this started playing and my grandma said out loud how much she loved the song. She heard it on the radio on one of those programs that play music according the decade. She really is one of those "I like everything" people, I love her.

Favorite colour: more than colour, I have a specific shade I like of every single colour, but, gray ofc, and the greyish turquoise of George Rexstrew's eyes (like my blog colours). And military green, brown, dark red, magenta, and lavender.

Last book: can't remember, it's been ages (a week) since I read... But probably the poetry anthology by Becquer I gifted myself for Xmas. And if we count comics online, the Sandman and The Glass Scientists.

Last movie: Descendants 4 bc I felt nostalgic and haven't seen it yet and... It's... Different. It is the same descendants as the other movies, but it doesn't feel quite right, I would have changed a few things, like the outfits and the songs distribution along the movie but OMG MONTY IS CAPTAIN HOOK THAT BOY IS SUCH A TWINK LIVE LAUGH LOVE JOSHUA COLLEY.

Last tv show: Like I wasn't screaming it, Doctor Who xd. I'm binge watching the new series and when I finish I'm starting with classic Who. And House MD bc I'm watching it with my grandma. But I love all the ppl who said Cunk on Earth or The Good Place, they're really good, y'all should watch them.

Sweet/spicy/savoury: Sweet ofc, I have the worst sweet tooth ever, but for bakery stuff rather than sweets, and bittersweet/acid-sweet.

Last thing I searched online: "Bingle Bongle Dingle Dangle" ...well, that's before the last one, which is "findhorn case 31.08.18 film where to watch" (a short movie with George Rexstrew I haven't seen yet, if someone knows where I can watch it thank you very much).

Current obsession: Dead Boy Detectives, David Tennant as usual, punk and ballet. Like, really, my YT feed is full of ballet stuff and my Pinterest is full of cool outfits w tons of safety pins and buttons and patches, I'm want to do a battle jacket but I don't have a jacket yet, lol, I had a jean vest but I gave it to my bf bc he looked like a JoJo's character wearing it. In my opinion it was a pretty good gift.

Looking forward to: get a job, buy a jacket and, yk, take care of myself. In two months is my 18 bday and I'm still don't have the appropriate mindset, sooooo, yep. I just started journaling, see if I can keep a routine w ballet, writing and piano, workout a little. But who knows.

Ten people I'd like to know better: I don't know if I'll get to 10, if they'll do it or how much do they want to share, most of them aren't even mutuals but artists I like, but, yk, just ppl I think are nice and I'm curious about: @majorlb @alterego77 @edwinspaynes @idliketobeatree @read-write-thrive @agerblade @ouchmyghostskin @tragedy-machine @fan-a-tink @kisolvetica @asidian

10 People I'd Like to Know Better

Thanks for the tags @gaiaseyes451 and @beerok23!💜!💜

last song: Gloria by the Lumineers

favourite colour: Red, like a deep luscious red that you know would taste good if you licked it. Don't act innocent, you know exactly what I mean by that. Red is a color that you just know tastes good.

last book: I am currently trying to read the Witcher series (per @lickthecowhappy's suggestion) so I am at the start of the Last Wish

last movie: Moana 2 (I have young kidsssss)

last TV show: My oldest is almost 10 which means she stays up late. Which also means I have so little time to watch adult things. So we've been watching the Office with her. I think I want to watch the Good Place with her next tho (I've never watched it!)

sweet/spicy/savoury: Sweet followed very, very closely by spicy. Habanero maple syrup is one of my favorite things on the planet.

last thing i searched online: How to explain a 10 year career hiatus in a cover letter (looking to return to work since having kids. It's been an interesting experience so far).

current obsession: Have not moved on from Good Omens, but recently realized that my obsession may be more in my own little connected universe of fics that I wrote rather than the actual canon at this point😳. I'm sure once we get that first glimpse of red and white hair that will change very quickly.

looking forward to: Going back to work and having a more established adult life again, honestly. I've been so lucky to be home with my kids while they are young, but I am ready. And figuring out how my newfound passion for writing is going to fit into that new life of mine. Another big year of change over here for me, and I am eagerly looking forward to how the growing pains are going to make way for something beautiful beyond.

ten people i’d like to know better:

@addledmongoose, @di-42, @afrenchwriter, @haemey, @eybefioro, @alwaystuesday, @katspause, @alphacentaurinebula, @shadesofecclescakes, @ochre-sunflower and whoever wants to do it (but also feel free to ignore!)

[poeticmoonspirit]

A Zutara fic request you say?!

I don't know what ratings you're comfortable with, but I've always wanted a modern college au where Katara is a regular at the Jasmine Dragon and interacts with Zuko a lot (who may or may not kinda dislike each other based on one bad experience) and meet anonymously on an online forum. They chat for weeks totally unaware of who they're talking to until Toph dares Katara to send a risqué photo, and Zuko immediately recognizes who exactly he's been chatting with. Things get awkward, apologies are made, and boom! Romance commences for these dorks.

Or just an awkward and romantic tea shop au. 😅

It had been weeks since Zuko saw Katara. The last time being the art exhibition he told her about during her shift at his favorite coffee place. Between classes and his side graphic design projects, he didn't really have much of a social life. So meeting her was a breath of fresh air and one he found he needed more frequently.

As soon as Zuko got home, he decided to turn on his laptop and play this fighting game him and Sokka play occasionally. He entered the chat room and found he had a friend request. Before clicking "add", he decided to look at the person's profile. They were his age and a girl. This is interesting, he thought. It wasn't that it was unusual for girls to play this game, but it wasn't common either. Squaring his shoulders, Zuko decided to type a "Hey, what's up" to get the conversation started. A minute later and a response came saying, "Lol, hey yourself." And from there, the conversation lasted about 5 hours and Zuko honestly couldn't say he hated it.

BlueSpirit427: so whats your family like

PaintedLady7: I have an older brother, grandma, and dad. Mom passed when I was 8.

BlueSpirit427: I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked

PaintedLady7: no it's fine. I mean, it's normal to ask questions like that, right?

BlueSpirit427: yeah but I've only known you for a few hours lol

PaintedLady7: well true. How about this...we ask each other stuff and that way it'll be even

BlueSpirit427: if it works for you then it works for me. You okay with that?

PaintedLady7: um, yeah. I'm the one who asked you that, lol

Zuko mentally face palmed himself for saying that. Of course she's okay with it, dumbass! He quickly responded with an apology and it went on from there.

The next day, Zuko went back online to see if that girl was online. She was. He found himself smiling which was weird for him. The only girl that ever made him smile like that was Katara and he barely knew her.

PaintedLady7: you live near Dai Li Airport right? I'm not too far from there so why don't we meet up? Tomorrow at 4pm? By the tea shop next to the coffee place

Holy shit! She wanted to hang out with him?! Oh Agni, please save me, Zuko internally screamed.

BlueSpirit427: yeah let's do it, lol. Just give me the address and we're good

PaintedLady7: awesome! Hey, is it weird I've never seen you before? I just wanna make sure you're legit

BlueSpirit427: I get it, but I promise you we're around the same age and I'm not some creep.

PaintedLady7: alright, I trust you. Which is weird bc I hardly ever trust people these days

BlueSpirit427: well count me as one of the people you can trust

PaintedLady7: ok, well I gotta go do homework so....see you later?

BlueSpirit427: yup, goodnight

PaintedLady7: :)

Zuko saw the green icon near her name turn red, meaning she was offline. He yawned and shut his laptop closed. He walked into the kitchen to grab a snack but saw Haru near the pantry eating the last one.

Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance. "Every single time, Haru! You always eat up the graham crackers."

He looked away, sheepishly, "Sorry, these are so good that I just couldn't help myself."

With a sigh, Zuko turned away from his roommate and went back to his room. He'd deal with that traitor later. Turning off his light, he couldn't help but feel excited for tomorrow.

____

Katara tied her long, thick hair back into a ponytail then headed out.

The sun was exceptionally bright today. She made sure to put on her sunglasses to shield her eyes, but also as a fashion statement.

She would be lying if she said part of her didn't worry about this little get-together. She never met the guy before and quite frankly she was sick of dealing with dishonest guys. Haru made her promises all the time and never kept his word. Jet on the other hand....

Let's not talk about Jet.

She headed up the stairs to make it to the Jasmine Dragon, the best tea shop around. She took her phone out, trying to send a quick text to the guy, asking if he was there yet when she bumped into someone.

"Oof, sorry—"

"Ah, my bad."

The two looked at each other. The guy had a scar on his face. Realization suddenly kicked in.

"Zuko?"

Zuko's eyes widened when he saw who he bumped into. "Katara?"

She pulled her purse strap closer on her shoulder. "What are you up to? Haven't seen you in forever."

Zuko rubbed his neck sheepishly, "A little this, a little that."

What was that?! What are you, twelve? He inwardly cursed, cringing at his response.

Katara laughed, "Still interesting, I see."

He chuckled. "Yeah, well, I'm supposed to be meeting someone here today. Like, right now."

"Oh? Me too! What a coincidence!"

Zuko rubbed his neck again, something Katara noticed him doing whenever the silence between them grew awkward.

"Uh, well. Would you like to join me for a cup of tea while we wait for our people to show?"

Zuko nodded, "Yeah, I mean, that'd be great."

They spent the next hour chatting about random things, oblivious to the time and the fact that neither of their respective people showed up yet.

"So wait, your uncle owns both the tea and coffee shops?"

Zuko sipped his hot leaf juice, as he called it. "Yeah. I mean, don't get me wrong, tea is his first love but he found that coffee is just as good."

Katara hummed, sipping her raspberry tea. "What you said before, about your family...that must be tough. Sorry you have to go through that."

Zuko shrugged. "It happened a long time ago," he took another sip of the warm liquid, "what about your family?"

Katara noticed the change in subject but didn't comment on it. "I have my older brother, grandma, and dad. Mom died when I was 8."

Zuko froze. He heard that same thing from the person he was talking to online. He decided to take the risk of looking stupid and asked, "Do you know someone named PaintedLady?"

Katara's eyes widened. Then she sat there until the pieces of the puzzle came together. "You—you're BlueSpirit?"

Zuko sat back, mouth agape in shock. "You mean all this time..."

Katara bursted out laughing, holding her stomach. "Zuko, we're so stupid!"

Zuko tried to hold it in, but hearing her laugh made all his worries go away instantly. A giggle escaped his lips until they were both crying from the sudden realization.

"That was so funny," Katara said, wiping the tears from her eyes.

And they became best friends because of it.

[phoebehalliwell]

bestie for pride month… please give the gays what we want: HEADCANONS OF YOUR Prue is given up at birth Piper dies!AU. please, I beg thee 🙏

lmaoooooo. okay. this is for the gays. [post for reference]

patty and sam's affair happens first before she ever meets victor then she gets knocked up grams almost has a hernia it's decided that even tho patty and sam love each other this is too much of a risk, their proximity to one another, and they need to separate in order to stay off the elders radar

patty gives birth to prue and then immediately gives her up at birth, she is taken in by the matthews family

patty later marries victor and has three daughters: piper, phoebe, and paige, but you could say it just wasn't meant to be, because patty and victor do ultimately get divorced

patty still drowns at the lake but in this specific au, she takes the water demon down with her

so there's no demon left in the lake

so when prue finds herself drawn to the lake whenever the matthews family goes camping, she really is at no risk

she'll just lie an the dock and talk, she says to herself, but that's not quite true

but idk it would just sound weird to say she's talking to the lake itself

meanwhile back at the manor piper is definitely very firm and very stern in her role as eldest sister but she's not as rigid as prue

like. bc phoebe and paige are a handful and a half. and piper tells them she tells them don't go out don't fucking do it but of course they do anyways. she doesn't bother to snitch to grams either and she'll still make them a full hangover breakfast the next morning but it always comes with a healthy dose of i told you so

one night paige and phoebe are tearing it up and paige is driving completely shitfaced and she crashes the car and phoebe, who was not buckled, goes flying through the windshield

that was the only time she ever really saw piper lose her shit, she was fucking furious, phoebe was in the hospital and piper came busting into the waiting room already screaming paige's name

but once she saw how broken her sister already was she just sat down and cried with her

that was the event that triggered paige's journey towards sobriety

it definitely also put a damper on phoebe's party spirit but grams's energy after than incident was so suffocating phoebe couldn't take it anymore and moved to new york

paige got her job in social services, piper got her job at quake, prue was working as a photographer, phoebe was a jack of all trades

after grams's death phoebe moved back in and the girls became charmed

their whitelighter in this is actually sam and he becomes something of a father figure to them

then piper bites it

this almost triggers a backslide in paige's sobriety, her & phoebe really lean on each other in this time, it's very heavy, very emotional, very intuitive

so naturally pragmatic prue matthews sticks out like a sore goddamn thumb

but still, there's something about piper's death that feels eerily familiar to her

it reminds her of how her long time boyfriend, a private investigator, andy died

and that scares her

she doesn't really want to go in on this witch stuff

however, the source has clocked her, and in an attempt to kill her, burns her house down or something, killing her parents, but, miraculous, she survived

she shouldn't have

the exits were sealed, they were pounding against the door, desperately trying to escape

there was no way she could have gotten out of the house

(unless she orbed)

so now she has nowhere to go

except for the manor

paige and phoebe really pull themselves together for this bc they were totally content to let themselves wallow their way out of existence over piper's death, but seeing prue

phoebe and paige have lost before. they've lost their mom and they've lost their grandma and they've lost their sister

it stings, but they know what it feels like to have a loved one die and they know they can make it through it

prue does not know that

she does not know how to grieve

she wants to

she doesn't even know

she wants to go to the lake

for piper, phoebe, and paige, how their mom died has always been a mystery

she didn't tell grams where she was going, only that she'd be back for dinner

prue, noting how they're all in mourning and all need the tranquility the lake offers, bring phoebe and paige with her

and they meet patty