#i know i've definitely probably shared this photo before but i can't remember. and i just found some edits from 2016 on my laptop

[2woofs-1meow]

rooney + scamp • mmxiv

[amiserableseriesofevents]

A short such stuff-verse drabble, on destiny and timing

WC: 1015

*

After months and months of talking about it, hours of searching, and probably hundreds of boxes between the two of them combined, it's finally happening: they've moved into their own place, a flat that will just be theirs with no risk of being walked into by roommates, no clothes left behind in the wrong bedroom, and no cramped up bathrooms to share during rush hour.

It's not a mansion, of course, but there's a huge bedroom for them and a smaller one for when John's sisters come to visit, two bathrooms, a kitchen where John can create his experimental recipes, and a living room with a giant sofa where they can cuddle up — with some space left for Meatball for when it's their turn to have him at home, of course.

For now, they've only put together and placed around the furniture. Tonight will be the first sleeping in their bed, already made with the space themed sheets Marge bought them as a home-warming present, and tomorrow they'll start putting everything else up around the house — pictures, posters, books, Gale's telescope.

Gale is going through one of his boxes searching for a book Benny insisted he gave him back years ago — no harm done if he can't find it, he can wait until they'll be helping him and Brady unpack next week in the flat right below theirs — when he gets sidetracked by a stack of old photos. Very old, he considers, noting that one is of him and Marge at their high school graduation, young and wide eyed and full of hope for their futures.

A large, warm palm comes ruffling his hair accompanied by the familiar creak of John's joints as he kneels down beside him. “Whatcha have there Buck?” He asks.

“Extremely old pictures. Look, it's me and Marge at graduation,” Gale answers showing John the photo and he takes him from him with a grin, tender and teasing all together. “Look at you! Oh I would've had the biggest crush on you if we'd been at school together Buck, I swear.”

“Oh, shut up: I've seen pictures of you in high school, you were definitely out of my league,” Gale scoffs, pleased. As John keeps singing his praises Gale continues to go through the pictures, smiling with tender nostalgia at the memories they bring up. There's the first picture he ever took with Benny, two weeks after they met in college; one of the day he got his degree with Benny and Marge by his sides; there's even a picture of puppy Meatball, barely more than a ball of fur with eyes.

“Ah, I remember this night!” He exclaims excited, showing John the picture: it's him in front of a building, at night, with a lot of other people around him. His smile in the picture is so big it splits his face in half, his cheeks rosy and round with excitement.

John looks utterly delighted when he grabs it. “When was this? You look so damn happy, look! Look at those cheeks!”

Gale laughs. “It was the night of one of Alex's shows, the opening night of the Greek tragedy he played, Oedipus at Colonus I think? I'd gotten the tickets by sheer luck and dragged Marge and Benny with me. She appreciated the costumes, but he made me swear never to force him through something like that ever again,” he says. “Look, it was packed!”

“Oh, I know,” John says in a weird tone. “I was there too!”

“What? Not in the show, right?”

“No, I'd come to see him! We were already friends, Oedipus was the last thing he did before Othello. I think... yeah, I should have a picture from that night too! Wait a second,” John says, then picks up his phone and starts scrolling back through years and years of photos until he taps at something, smiling triumphantly. “There!” He exclaims, showing Gale the picture of a younger John, mustache-free and leaner but still looking basically the same, with the same excited smile he's sporting right now.

“We were there at the same moment and didn't know,” Gale says, the realization hitting him point blank. What would've happened if they'd seen each other that night? If they'd stopped for a chat about the show, maybe discovering they had so much in common — it's illogical, but Gale still feels a pang of sadness at the thought of all that potential happiness they've missed on.

“Buck, what's that behind you in your picture?” John asks, again with a strange voice, like he didn't hear what Gale said.

Gale squints and says, “An arm? Someone taking a selfie I guess, there were so many people-”

John shoves his phone in Gale's face. “I think it's my arm,” he says, voice thick and trembling with emotion. “Look. Blonde hair behind my head, a white shirt like yours. It's you, isn't it?”

Silently, Gale confronts the two photos and he comes to the same conclusion as John's: the arm peeking out behind his back in his picture, clad in a brown leather jacket, is in the same position as John's arm in his picture. And behind John there's a blond guy with the same haircut Gale had at that time, and the collar of the with shirt he's wearing is bent exactly like Gale's in his picture.

They both stare at the photos, at a loss for words.

“We were standing back to back,” Gale murmurs. He doesn't know how to feel about it, if just surprised or more psyched, or maybe angry that they'd missed each other all that time ago.

Luckily for him, John's faring better in the emotional department: he brings him closer and presses a kiss to his temple, lips shivering slightly against his hair. “If this isn't a sign that you've always been my destiny, I don't know what is,” he says and for once Gale doesn't scoff at his sentimentality.

Because it's true, he feels it deep in his bones; they've always been destined to meet, they just needed to find the right time.

[idyllcy]

from one admirer to another : runny?

pairing: leon kennedy x reader || masterpost: from one admirer to another

synopsis: from one admirer to another, an online penpal service, allows for two people with common interests to write to each other without ever revealing their actual address! Luckily for both you and Leon, you get matched up! What do eggs and Christmas even have in common anyway? sure hope it's that modeling business and NOT that Ada Wong addiction.

featuring: reader as model number two // leon as Leon

My dearest, model number two,

I've always been rookiecookie, but I guess that flew past your notice back then during the cupsleeve event. There's nothing I find strange about trusting you. If anything, I find it to be as natural as breathing.

What do I fall back to on a hard day? I like cookie dough ice cream with a marathon of my favorite show, huddled into the corner of my couch with Sunny on my lap. When I'm out ordering... typically it's a gelato of some kind. You know, family roots and all. I still have a family recipe — if you're down to come over again to make it.

I like hundred-petaled roses. My dad used to bring them home for my mom, and she used to keep everyone he had. She'd dehydrate them, and then she had a pretty clear bottle with every single petal she had ever received from dad. I found it kind of disgusting back when I was a kid, but thinking back upon it, it was kind of cute. Does that count as a fond memory as well?

You don't need to glance through that veil of mine. I'll let you in willingly, and then when you are comfortable, I'll lay myself bare by you, telling you findings from the heart. Who knows, maybe that can be at your place? (and if not, please let me visit anyway. I'd like to meet sesame bun.)

If we do end up dating, then I'll definitely fly you in for my shows and shoots. You can take exclusive backstage photos of me as well. Who doesn't like behind-the-scenes content of their favorite model? I'm sure they'd like content of me looking at you all stupid in love too. The people are desperate.

Oh, right. Before I forget. I'm hosting a Thanksgiving dinner at my place on in the club room. Come over? We start at 5. I can take you home after.

Please? Leon

Leon drops his letter off a week before he even thinks about buying groceries for the dinner. To be fair, it isn't until Claire texts him a grocery list that he remembers that he should probably get ready to cook. He'd suggest Chris' place, but he has a grill, and it had been a while since they got to get dinner together. The club room has a pretty good barbecue... and it wasn't like the turkey was going to be fried like all the other times at Chris' place... Leon wonders how the hell the turkey's going to work out. Yes, Chris is making it. No, he doesn't know what it's going to be if not fried like all the other years.

Instead, he follows Claire's orders on what to buy and not to buy, pushing the cart through the aisles as he checks the chat history for any other item to buy, before your phone call rings in.

"Hey."

"Got your letter. Wesker's hosting us for Thanksgiving, unfortunately." You mumble. "I sent my letter earlier today, so it should arrive right before Thanksgiving."

"You can't make it?"

"How 'bout a date instead?" You check your phone. "I can come over to help cook. Wesker refuses to let any of us cook, so I'm not doing anything in the afternoon. What do you make for Thanksgiving?"

"I was thinking cookies or pie."

"Oh... cookies..." You mumble. "I'll bring ingredients then! I'll also bring a pie because, well, there's a really good pie place by mine and I thought I'd share the joy."

"Will you bring the leftovers home?"

"Hm? Am I not allowed to visit you over the weeks?"

Leon malfunctions, blinking. "What?"

"Leaving leftovers at your place? So I have an excuse to visit later? Forget I said—"

"NO! No, oh, please come over. I'd love to have you at my place over the weekend." Leon saves himself. God.

He's.

Yeah.

He's down awful.

prev letter : masterlist : next letter

[sempsimps]

toga head cannons + dating bits

so mha what a show i have been violently thrown back into it and currently re watching it along with another 4 animes anyway here i am ready to make this since I have like *checks notes * 16- nope 19- nope hold on 24! drafts and I can see more on the horizon so I'm finally letting my bisexual self get some crazy girls on my list

headcannons

She likes Hello Kitty. I think she would love Kuromi (I don't know for sure, as I've never watched it. I'm not really into Sanrio stuff.)

she has some skills with drawing but nothing too major. maybe a really good sketch once in a while, on some important documents (definitely got into a lot of trouble for doodling on her school books or anything like that. ik i did)

She chews on pens or pencils. possibly hoodie drawstrings, just anything, to be honest.

I feel like she loves dinosaurs, like at least knowing some random facts from like stolen picture books or remembering an interesting thing from a museum, and I guess the Internet exists

Dating stage

she has been rejected a few times, which is obvious, so when she finds you, she is nervous about falling fast yet again and getting left. again. but she can't help it, and when you say you feel the same, she could happily fight and die for you x10 more than she already felt like she would

Blood jewelry absolutely 100% like a pretty heart-shaped pendent that's suspiciously liquidy and a beautiful red like take all my money (I will for the precious bean)

She is a criminal, so getting more domestic dates is kind of difficult. so there's options 1 she drinks someone else's blood to disguise and just dresses different from them, so it's less obvious and go to a coffee shop or something. OR 2 screw the domestic stuff! and go out to steal sweets or candy and idk steal a shopping cart, go spray paint some rich guys house, and do stupid shit like getting arrested only to call dabi or shigaraki for help as you both laugh at how stupid that was.

She would love it if you knew how to style hair or let her style yours and be matching

Speaking of matching toga would absolutely have pj's/ onesies for the both of you. examples I can think of would be the night and light furry ones (I think they neat) also those two peice ones so sharing two sets like, skull top and pink short and then having pink tank top and skull trousers.

Love language is physical touch, words of affirmation, and gift giving all the way. Holding hands? "Ah! We're holding hands haha, suck it, dabi your bitchless!". she needs soothing words during a cuddle session like fr tell her she's an amazing girlfriend. Anything you get her stuff like that is definitely her new bragging right, new hair clip? It's on, and she refuses to take it out until you do it yourself. A little pin it's going on her skirt, a keyring? She's putting at least two of those on the handle of her favourite knife. You made her a painting/ printed a photo/ wrote a poem or anything? It's getting framed and hung above her bed

She probably had lots of photos before you dated, but now she definitely has. 2 folders one is a digital file on her phone, and the other is stashed away, filled with secretly taken ones that she looks at when she misses you

If you're a hero, she'll make it a point to watch you and look at all your fan base online. "It's my turn on the TV my adorable partner is on." She would also want to go on every mission close to where your agency would be. If you have any merchandise, she has it already. If she sees other people wearing your clothing line, she would either compliment it or want to stab them (I can't decide)

That's all i can think of, and i want to do more, so anything else in the comments would be nice. im trying to ease my way into writing female characters. i might be bi, but i can't talk to women, so this was fun and a little difficult for me

[cowardlychimera]

Chimera I'm staring at u w my autistic eyes please share your theories w me

I love love Yume Nikki and Omori parallels I once read someone's comment saying "Black Space is a love letter written to Yume Nikki," which is so true to me!!!!! AGHH

ah okay!! fair warning though that this might just be me getting excited over a cool idea lol and might be wrong

okay so: 2 things I noticed that seem similar in both. windows and doors.

when someone hears the word daydreamer, the first thing they think of might be someone staring out a window, right?

and we know Madotsuki and Sunny both prefer their dreams over reality. so windows = inaction. observing, going with the flow.

this fits I think, since in omori, what's one very important window?

this.

Mari says Sunny's seen this before, when he almost drowned. he almost drowned because he gave in. he didn't believe he could do anything, so he didn't.

don't have much for yume nikki about windows tbh though, just that from what I remember Madotsuki's name might refer to windows (if there's anything I don't know of/forgot please share!)

okay now doors!! doors definitely tie these 2 games together! doors = action. choosing to do something instead of just letting things happen

Madotsuki refuses to open her door. she refuses to make the choice to leave, seeming to prefer her dreams over reality. Sunny can do the same. the front door that Kel knocks on, it's Sunny's last chance to fix things. he gets to choose.

and in white space and Madotsuki's dream room? they can leave whenever they want to, through a door! same thing with nexus/door room/whatever you wanna call it and black space! they get to choose what doors to open. they get to choose whether or not they want to accept reality. and even more in omori, the door to Basil's bedroom and his hospital room. he doesn't have to open those doors. whether he faces reality and tries to fix things is up to him. and the door to the roof too! once he walks through the door, he can't go back. he already made his choice.

and sliding glass doors? I'm not 100% about these yet, but sliding glass doors could represent a choice they might want to make, but are hesitant to for whatever reason. they're like a combination of windows and doors! in omori, they're shown in both reality and black space/after finding the photo where Sunny pushed Mari. they're Sunny's want and choice to face reality and accept it, attempting to fix things. but in yume nikki? Madotsuki wants to escape. there's 2 events (I've only triggered one of these 2 so far, so info on one might be incorrect!) where Madotsuki can fly away, and unfortunately fall, the witch event and the spaceship + spaceship event. one has her flying through the clouds, and falling from the sky, while the other has her flying through the stars, also falling from the sky (if you manage to trigger the event, that is). Madotsuki wants to fly away. the sliding door could represent her want, and her choice to escape reality.

okay okay I'm almost done lmao hang in there

now, closets! (once again, I haven't explored any closet stuff in yume nikki yet lol so I might be wrong about stuff) first, in omori! it's obvious Sunny doesn't want to acknowledge the closet is broken violin is hidden in, going far enough for it to even disappear for him! the closet represents something he's hiding. there is a phrase, "skeleton in the closet", that refers to a secret someone wants to hide. so this theory fits the closet in omori! it might also fit the closets found in yume nikki.

Madotsuki doesn't want to find herself.

(also final thing: these things probably do represent more than just this. this is just stuff I noticed seems connected to both games so far! also also I haven't finished yume nikki yet lol so once again feel free to correct me if anything's wrong)

[hlizr50]

Hi, I'm a big fan of all your works and nearly screamed in excitement when I saw your post "Fanfic Updates." I saw a lot of stories you said were in progress but I had sadly never seen them before. I checked your AO3 account again and when I tried your master list I think the link is wrong because every time I clicked on 'ACOTAR Masterlist' it just brings me back to the pinned post with links to all your master lists (that I can't reach). I just wanted to let you know and perhaps would you share a link to your stories in progress? Specifically 'Of Police and Pen Names' if you don't mind? I really enjoy your writing and can't wait for your next update!

Hi there! Thank you so much for your support and for reading my fics!!

I'll definitely have to look at my master lists. I know there was some word traveling about that Tumblr links were broken, but I never remembered to look. I'll have to do that.

I also probably should have found a way to differentiate between Earned, Not Taken and Of Police and Pen Names. I've started writing both, but I've only started posting Earned, Not Taken. It was supposed to be a bit of a side project, but has since invaded my psyche. So Of Police and Pen Names has not started going up on AO3.

To make up for it, though, here's a snippet from Of Police and Pen Names!

“Azriel.” Before she could answer he forged on. “So do you not make enough money from your books and your photo ops?” Irritation flared within her, and she could feel her face starting to burn. Curse her face and the way she could never hide her emotions.

“I opened the shop before I got published,” she hissed. “And there are no official photo ops, you presumptuous dickbag.”

“There’s no need for name-calling, Birdie,” he waved her away, and that simmering irritation boiled over into anger.

“Birdie?!”

“Why no photo ops, then?”

Was she invisible? Did she make noise when she spoke? It was a damn shame that a man who was so easy on the eyes could be such a giant pain in the ass. Gwyn could feel the flush in her face, all the way to the tips of her ears, but nothing she said would really make a difference. So she just took a deep breath and prayed to literally anyone to give her patience.

“My privacy is very important to me.” It was the truth, though she wasn’t willing to elaborate. It was none of his business why she did everything she could to keep her name and photos off the internet. Why she dyed her hair this deep red instead of the coppery brown that was natural to her. Why she hid her body underneath tunics and long skirts and baggy sweats.

He didn’t say anything after that.

But he also didn’t leave.

[murdoc]

this is a weird post to make, but i dont really have many places to say it and i wanna share my thoughts Somewhere lol

so i found my dad after more than a decade of being out of contact with him (probably since 2010? at latest, very early 2011). or rather, after every few years of searching for a little while and coming up fruitless, he made a new facebook less than three weeks ago and i just happened to get Really lucky timing.

just before him i had also found my (former) step sister + mom, as well as my half sister (all sisters younger than me and previously i couldnt find), and.. its a strange experience to finally see people who used to be so close to you in your life show uo again, visibly older and doing their own thing.

its hard to explain.. its almost like youve woken up from a coma. you have memories and have had dreams of these people for years and years and during that time you never really realized that the image you have of them was one trapped in amber; even when youre cognizant of the passage of time, your mind just can't take into consideration the individualized process of aging, both physically and where the passage of time will take them and their relationships. you realize these people are now essentially strangers to you.

my (former) step mom has remarried again and has her own set of children (again), one of my step uncles ended up passing away, my step sister is no longer how i remembered her in 2007 from one of the few photos i have of her in my possession and is posting hippie white woman stuff on her feed, my half sister doesnt share my last name (paternal) anymore, nor her mother or new husband's, whom she is having a child with. i was able to figure out it was her because of the name and how she looks strikingly like her mom and has photos with my dad in them.

my dad himself has aged significantly since he's last shared a photo of himself anywhere. he used to always wear hats, but in a new photo he's got solid white hair despite being in his early 40s and is balding (HE did this to me..) and finally learned what glasses suit his face better LMAO. honestly, he looks better now than he ever did when i've seen him. which i think was one of the biggest shockers because god he looked so lame. this also gives me hope for myself B)

the thing i noticed the most though is how "normal" him and my half sisters turned out. granted, he was always so much more put together than my mother-- i'm sure thats why they didnt really like each other lmao. but, while im not sad about my life, even if it's definitely different than i assumed for my age, i can't help but wonder where i'd be if i had allowed myself to overcome the fear of my mother and went to go live with my dad like we had planned in 2008 or 2009.

however, just from how hard it has been to piece together the state of that side of my family, i don't think any speculation could even be remotely accurate. ive also never really been one to dwell on what could be anyway. at the end of the day i cant undo how horrific my childhood was, but i can make steps to grow from it and learn to love who i am and where i am now.. for how cheesy that sounds 😭

i am glad i finally got a bit of closure on this though. i knew my dad was still around somewhere, but not knowing anything beyond "he's alive" for so long left me with a lot of questions, now mostly answered. it's nice to know he seems to be doing good and that he's there for my younger sisters (not sure about my step sister, but i have an additional half sibling that i never met beyond a few times as a toddler and it seems she's fine too). i know that social media doesn't tell all and is usually finely curated to share the best moments, but i'm saying this in comparison to my mother who would never in a million years do what he seems to be doing.. down to having custody of his kids LMAO.

i don't think i'll ever reach out to any of them though. i know my dad still thinks of me once in a blue moon, as he's dedicated a birthday post to me some years ago on a now deleted profile, but if you can imagine.. i think my change in the last 13 years or so is a bit more drastic than just growing up. not to mention they have their own lives going on and it all seems just fine.

i guess if he ever does try to find me, he'll find out that my former step uncle (different one who is still alive) who teased him about only having girls was wrong LMAO. but i dont think he could ever find me unless he got in contact with my older sister who isn't doing too hot rn, or my mother.... and if it's my mom he goes through, i sure as hell hope he thinks finding his now son was worth it. i sure as hell wouldnt go through talking with my mom if i was him.

i dont think i ever made a post so long and detailed about my life on here??? if someone fsr actually read this... hi :) why did you do that? you are silly

[dearweirdme]

https://www.tumblr.com/dearweirdme/721296942807810048/httpstwittercomnavertaehyungstatus167371194?source=share

Now this makes that OP who brought her heavy Elle magazine in the middle of the night thinking she'd bump into taehyung story suspicious. Tae's autograph in that magazine is a little different, too. However, the clearer video shows that it was Taehyung despite only his side profile is visible.

I never really considered this a publicity stunt coz a lot is at stake for the both of them. I thought it's a bit of a reach, but now I'm considering the possibility of it. I can't stop thinking of that Kdrama scene where they were making a dating scandal or something. It's freakin' similar! lol

The gurumi photos looked really like Tae and Jennie, but then none of the photos were clearly showing their faces. They either have their phones or masks covering their faces or they're not looking directly at the camera. We see how clear the photos Tae and Jennie post on their IG, so why are there no clear photos of them together? And where is gurumi now? But I also remember the YG statement before about Jennie's cloud being hacked or something, so maybe those are real photos. I dunno anymore. lol I'm also considering the DC Gallery and how HYBE and YG staff being involved in this.

Also, the lack of response from Tae, considering how protective and assertive he is, makes me question the truth of this dating issue. Weren't those photos and videos a go signal for them to come out already? Since they were out in the open now anyway, and a lot of media especially kmedia have reported about it already. It's impossible for them not to know this.

He and Jennie might probably just keeping things lowkey for now (If they really are together) that's why they're not giving any statements.

The hate Jennie is getting, and Tae being silent about it, is very uncharacteristic of him. Maybe he just doesn't want to make a mountain out of a mold, and most of the hate Jennie is getting is because of her lack of enthusiasm in concerts and her HBO show anyway, so he might not want to meddle in that.

Anyway, all these theories feel like a kdrama. lmao. Let's tune in for the next episode.

Hi anon!

Oh definitely!

Celebs know how to go around unseen. They wear plain clothing, and not flashy jacket's like Tae's Celine one. They don't go walking around with a whole team when they want to go unseen. They don't go and sign autographs when they want to be private. Arists do say no to fans and paps if they want to. No-one tried to stop that pap, and he was around them for some time. THey wanted to be seen that night, I am sure of it.

If thos Gurumi pics of Tae Jennie are actually from her Instagram (which is what most people seem to lean to) either Gurumi picked the odd ones, or Jennie posted weird pics on there. Jennie having pics of them on her Insta that early in their "relationship" means they would have already been rather serous back then, because she had no trouble letting her private followers know. And yet they are still hesitant to make an actual statement now, while also having no problem walking around in Paris.

I know what it looks like to me.

On a side note: I've gotten a few asks about how people see Jennie. I won't be posting those, because I'm not a Jennie-discussion blog and I don't really like the turn the conversation is taking. CA anon, thanks for you ask... it was very helpful. Misogyny anon, it is about letting women make their own choices, not about how others percieve those choices.

[dramaqueeenamby]

I posted 334 times in 2022

33 posts created (10%)

301 posts reblogged (90%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@cocoamoonmalfoy

@jazzytee

@lovebittenbyevans

@jazzyf1

@tchallasbabymama

I tagged 329 of my posts in 2022

Only 1% of my posts had no tags

#photo - 205 posts

#text post - 72 posts

#black women - 67 posts

#dqa ask - 22 posts

#marvel tings - 19 posts

#black panther - 15 posts

#mcu - 15 posts

#personal - 9 posts

#black men - 7 posts

#black panther: wakanda forever - 7 posts

Longest Tag: 65 characters

#hopefully y’all stumble across some amazing and underrated works!

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Amby!!!!! It’s so good to see you!!! How are you love??

Hey babe!!! I always miss ya'll when I do my little disappearing acts. Ugh. I'm okay. Life is still lifin, but you know how that is.....

How are you?????

@cocoamoonmalfoy

7 notes - Posted November 13, 2022

#4

😒😒😒😒😒 I see some things never change on this damn site

13 notes - Posted November 13, 2022

#3

updates.

Don't remember the last time I shared some things, but I got my counselor license at the top of this year, so I'm a licensed professional counselor in my state! Working on certifications on child and adolescent trauma as well as a neuropsychological treatment approach to anxiety. I'm going to apply for my next (and final) license which would allow me to open my own private practice (which is the goal) in August of next year. I also got a car, her name is dulce. She's the babe. Uhhhh got formally diagnosed with PCOS, and that's been kicking my ass in so many ways, so that sucks. Been working on a writing project for a minute now, but I can't talk about it cause it's not just mine. Anddddd......I've been reading more and playing sims on Saturdays. Oh! I'm also only gonna be working Monday through Thursday starting the 3rd week of August, so hopefully that will free up some time.

Probably more, but I won't bore folks.

19 notes - Posted July 24, 2022

#2

Black Panther 2 was a masterpiece, and I am emotional.

Expect a one shot sometime tonight.

84 notes - Posted November 11, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Easy | T'Challa Udaku

A/N: My god, BP2 was such an emotional ride. This is a product of all of the emotions I'm still reeling from. I have not written for BP in probably a year+, so I apologize for the rustiness.

Warnings: ANGST.

Words: 3K

You can find my other works HERE.

++++++++++++DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN BLACK PANTHER: WAKANDA FOREVER++++++++++++

-----------

Loving him was easy. 

Maybe too easy.

Maybe things would have been easier if he wasn’t so easy. So easy to admire, so easy to be drawn to, so easy to feel an ungodly amount of love and adoration for. 

But maybe that was just T’Challa. With his beautiful smile and brilliant mind, few paths seemed to lead to some place loveless. He was the embodiment of attraction, from the way he spoke, to the way he conducted himself, to the way he loved.

Yeah….easy seemed to be unavoidable. 

A small smile makes its way to your face as you reminisce on your first meeting all those years ago. 

“Would you just tell me already?”

Nakia simply looks over at you with that same bored yet tempted expression. “And ruin the surprise? Never.”

She laughs, clearly amused by your frustration, by the lack of patience for which you’ve still struggled to fully comprehend. 

You’d just completed your War Dog training and had been assigned to Nakia, to shadow her on a few missions and prove that you were ready for your own assignment. It was a perfect partnership, as Nakia matched your wit and sense of humor, both of which had definitely gotten you in trouble more times than you’d like to admit.

“How about a hint?”

“How about no?”

Your eyes narrowed as you nudged her. “You are enjoying this.”

“Somewhat,” she admits. You share another look before giggling together when a firm voice from behind interrupts your moment. 

“Forgive me, ladies.”

“You are not forgiven,” your response is natural and instantaneous, a small smirk playing on your face. “Matter of fact, you should know better than to sneak on two lad–” The smirk drops and your ridicule is cut short by the dark eyes and curious gaze of the crowned prince who stands before you. 

If Nakia was amused before, she was delighted now. You can feel her eyes still focused on you as she bumps you with her hip. “Y/N, you didn’t finish your statement. How rude.”

Your glare could burn two holes into the princess as she shakes her head and returns her focus onto Prince T’Challa. 

“Yes, T’Challa?” It’s in the most random, unexpected moments that you remember while Nakia is your friend, she is also royalty. Perhaps it’s something you should commit to memory, especially given how you’ve just completely disregarded all protocol for the future ruler of Wakanda. 

Finally able to pick your eyeballs off the ground, you find that T’Challa’s gaze is pinpointed on you. “Nakia is correct. It is improper to finish your statement…..”

He trails off, and you realize he’s searching for your name. Slightly dejected and still embarrassed, you answer, hastily adding a “your grace” onto the end. For good measure and respect.

He simply makes a sound before repeating your name. It feels so strange hearing your name on his mouth, strange but also….right. Shifting your stance, you’re thankful when he finally reirects his focus to Nakia. Memory of what was said between them was lost years ago, but the initial butterflies in your stomach upon your first meeting have always stayed with you. 

You pray to Bast they always will. 

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330 notes - Posted November 11, 2022

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[raeyapper]

Okay so fun omori theory. *SPOILERS* Mari didn't die when she fell down the stairs. I know what you are thinking. "But mari is most definitely dead in real world" well ya but she died after she fell down the stairs.

Lemme explain. My gf told me this theory and I really like it so I ma share it. So when I saw the backspace photos in my second play through I thought "wait I've fallen down the stairs before and it didn't KILL me I just got a couple bruses." But the my gf told me this and it all made sense.

So Sunny and Mari are fighting at the top of the stairs. Sunny pushes Mari and mari falls. My gf made sure to point out we only see mari mid fall but we don't see the whole fall. She says that she believe that since Mari fell BACKWARDS she must've hit her head or neck on a stair right? So let's assume Mari broke her neck by hitting it on a stair. After ward she would tumble backwards and eventually land on her side. But the would only have a broken neck and some bruises. That normally doesn't kill people. So what if Mari was unconscious but still alive.

Now Sunny and Basil are stuck with an injured unconscious Mari. They are 12 and not medically trained so they don't think to check her pulse. Even if they knew they were scared and panicking so they probably weren't thinking straight. They take her up stairs thinking she needs rest yada yada. Then they realize "omg she fucking dead" but remember in this theory she is not dead but injured.

Sunny and Basil don't know this. Basil proposes they hang her. So they hang her. In this theory as they are hanging her Mari gains some consciousness but she can't contact the boy bc she is badly injured. This theory proposes she opened her eye to try and let the boys know she is okay. But the don't notice it. So they hang her and Mari suffocates to death.

Fast forward to after everyone has seen mari and are wallking away (last 2 ish pics of blackspace) The picture discription says sunny saw Basil look back at Mari mortified. He also looks back and sees something staring back. Sunny and Basil realize that Mari was alive. . . and they just hung her. This explains the eyes on somethings. Sunny's something eye is Mari's eye staring back at him. Taunting him. Basils something is from before Mari was conscious but the eyes were added as guilt.

This also explains why sunny subconsciously hates basil (blackspace) he blames him for Mari's death. It was basil's idea to hang her after all. This also explains why Basil is always apologizing to Sunny. He knows it's his fault but he didn't know.

This theory also adda a whole new level of dark because sunny pushed Mari and they hanged her while she was alive and realized their mistake to late. I also wanna mention the poster somewhere in headspace that says "You Did It" with a smiley face and a Jump rope underneath. You did it you killed her. You could have helped her but instead you killed her.

Just a theory

[firespirited]

Honestly I don't even believe Musk is autistic. I think he's just an ass and wants to use his supposed autism as an excuse. I've never met a person with autism who acts like THAT.

Neurodivergent people can be horrid too, I think if you have a fairly coddled existence or lose sight of where you came from anyone can go from being decent, even really empathetic to being self-absorbed. It's how we ended up with folks who felt alienated growing up into bullies who can't fathom that they're being bullies because they were the hurt one.

-------------------------------

So there's this threshold of money which allows you to live comfortably, not worry about your kids and even make investments and once you earn above that, if you're not super careful, your priorities and mindset radically change: it becomes about ego, rankings, accolades, having three more lines about you in the paper than the other person. It's above this threshold that the only identity politics that matter is the shared wealth bracket so you get the Jay Zs, Caitlin Jenners and JK Rowlings of the world who were underdogs at one point but seem, like, completely removed from their old life.

-------------------------------

We live in an age where hyperfixation on a subject (and the parental loan and investment bluffing) has led several autists to get very rich or famous: Zuckerberg, Gates and Musk, Dan Harmon and Stanley Kubrick, the creator of Pokemon, several minecraft youtubers... Success without hurting others (whether you're neurotypical or not) is all about knowing your blind spots and making sure you have collaborators who'll correct you (and protect you from tarnishing your image at the very least).

Elon Musk is most probably autistic*, raised by a heartless dad then failed upwards: so he might have seen himself as a victim, as the only smart person in the room and definitely not needing anyone's help far before he ever hit that income threshold and started seeing most other human beings as pawns or useless in his world.

A lot of us have learned to compensate really hard in the areas where we tend to be clueless but there are people who don't. My Grandma put a huge amount of work into passing at work but she gets cruel with loved ones when she feels insecure and overwhelmed to get us to leave instead of being able to say she needs some space. I have to work really hard on presenting painful facts in a sugar-coated carefully planned manner instead of just blurting it out because volume and tone really matter.

*He feels Aspergers applies to him and people generally don't come out as something potentially stigmatizing unless it applies. Also I have to show you this photo of him, his twin son (on the right) and triplets: I can't tell you exactly what it is but it's something: I have so many photos just. like. this. from overly posed to not quite there to I forgot we were taking photos.

In a nutshell: We all have blind spots, we don’t all have a billion dollars and surround ourselves with ‘yes men’ so we can ignore the consequences of the blind spots. If I hurt someone, I hope they’ll tell me or that I have folks who’ll notice so I can change. You have to hope that should you ever get successful, you’ll remember those safety nets and keep embracing the discomfort of having to remember to do better.

[natswritingz]

Sexting next door / Sam x Reader

Note : This is my first fic in I don’t know how long, I tried my hardest so I really hope at least someone can enjoy this lol, also might be typos!

Words : 2.4k

Warnings : Sexting, exchanging pictures, dirty dirty talking, talk of oral/penetration/dry humping, swearing, lots of stuff.

The last week had been occupied with a hunt which ended with the three of you searching the woods for an old cemetery, laying all the buried souls to rest. Working with the Winchesters made the gigs easier. You found some joy in their presence, especially around Sammy.

You guys obviously had crushed on eachother, Sammy made the most moves while you took them as innocent jokes. You just didn't want to complicate anything for anyone.

You all had just got back to the motel, while the brothers shared a room like always, you got your own right next door. Your phone sat next to you as you pried off your dirt caked boots, hidden graveyards were something else. The device chimed with Sams assigned ringtone, you grabbed it in eagerness.

"You get settled in?"

You smiled at the text, he knew how to make you feel special even if it's a simple check in. You struggled with a response that sounded natural, typing then deleting, you finally wrote one and went with it.

"Yeah, just got the boots off lol"

"Are you getting anything good on the tv?"

"Nope, nothing"

That was a lie, you haven't even looked at the tv yet, but he didn't know that. You began unbuttoning your grimy top, feeling the cool air nip at your skin while the material still hung on your shoulders. You bit your lip as you typed another text to follow your previous one.

"Finally getting out of these clothes too"

You locked your phone quickly with embarrassment, you couldn't believe what you just sent. He was your friend, but the entire day he had been constantly flirting which made the temptation even harder to resist. The phone chimed after what felt like ages.

"Me too, I was able to get the shower first"

You read the text through squinted eyes, terrified to read his response with fully opened eyes. Your mind trailed to the image of him without anything on, the warm water running down his toned body, it made your heart race.

"Just about to get in"

You nervously pulled at your lip while intently watching the screen.

"Maybe I should hop in too, hot water sounds amazing right now"

"Do it, I'll keep you company ;)"

The wink confirmed it. He was leaving an opening for you to accept or decline before pursuing anything more.

"I'm taking off my clothes right now, what are you doing?"

"Turning the shower on, already undressed"

"I wish I could see that"

He opened it and hasn't responded in a while, you completely fucked it up. You cursed at yourself before seeing the tiny text bubble come up and disappear a few times until one finally came in.

"I wish I could see you take off those jeans, I could not stop staring at your ass today. All I wanted to do was pounce on you, you've been all I could think of."

You gulped at his message, this was would be your first time sexting, you were already loving it. You felt yourself getting excited at his message, reading it over and over. You pulled your shirt off the rest of the way.

"You were looking? That's very unprofessional of you, Sammy. If only I knew, I would've been 'accidentally' grinding against you all day."

Both of your tones suddenly changed, it wasn't the laid back no-period texts you normally exchanged, it was dirty and intriguing. You couldn't wait for him to respond.

"If you had done that, I don't think I would've been able to control myself."

"What would you have done? I would've loved to feel you press against my ass, I'm clenching my thighs just thinking about it."

"I would've pulled you into the nearest room and commanded you to grind against me until you came in your pretty panties."

You groaned at the thought, Sammy made dry humping sound hot, he could probably make any sexual act sound compelling.

"How do you know what panties I wear?"

You found yourself completely wrapped in texting back and forth you forgot about your plans to shower. Deciding to get comfortable, you leaned back onto the comforter. You were invested in where this was going, a shower could wait, unlike this.

"I've done your laundry and seen you in your undergarments before. I think I pretty much know everything about you, Y/N."

"I'm imaging my lace covered pussy grinding against your bulge covered by your boxers. It would feel so good to have you rub against me. I'd be soaking through my panties you could definitely see it dampening both our cloths."

You wanted to get dirtier so you tested the water, you wrote the first thing you thought of. It may have been a little too forward but your lust clouded all rational thinking.

"Jesus. My imagination might not be doing this scenario justice, I think we'd have to try it out next time we see eachother."

The elation in you grew with each suggestion.

"And when will that be?"

"If you keep it up, soon. Have you stripped yet?"

Sam was a great dom, he wanted everything to be in his control and you couldn't help but like it. You could trust him with control.

"I've been so busy with our little daydreams, I forgot I was even going to shower. Laying in bed still partially clothed."

"Take your pants off now, then give your ass a nice spank for me. Make it sting."

You followed his orders, placing the phone to your side as you lifted your hips to remove the jeans. You held the phone again as you flipped, now laying on your stomach, you used your free hand to rub on your cheek before giving it a sharp smack.

"Both are done, I'm thinking this might leave a mark?"

You raised your phone in a rush of confidence, snapping a photo of your ass and the handprint that reddened with time, attaching it to your message, and sending it without any hesitation. The mark was not as big as Sam could do and you dearly wished it was his hand instead.

"Fucking hell Y/N, I was not expecting that. You're making me want to come over right now to fuck you senseless."

"What do I do next? Still have my panties and bra on."

"Take your bra off baby girl, play with your nipples till they're both hard. Pinch them, flick them, be rough with it."

It was easy for you to follow his words, you found yourself loving his demands and dominance, you could keep following them for hours. You held yourself up with an elbow, you pinched the tip hard between your fingertips, rolling them slightly for more stimulation. You moaned with each uncoordinated flick.

"They're feeling so sensitive now."

You attached another picture, your tits in frame with your now erect and red nipples. After his reaction with the last one, you wanted to get more from him.

"So so perfect. Picture I'm there, sucking and biting on them. My warm breath fanning your soft skin. I want to make you feel good."

"You're making me feel good right now, I can't believe we're actually doing this."

"We can stop whenever you get uncomfortable, I want you to be good with all of this."

His message made you smile through the lust, he really did care about you. It wasn't the most ideal timing, but you could easily get worked back up again with his skills.

"Sorry, never wanna stop this <3"

You shook your head with a small laugh as you flirted.

"Good, me neither. You still have your panties on like a good girl?"

"Haven't taken them off yet, you haven't told me to."

"Sounds like someone's enjoying being bossed around, huh? What if I told you to suck me off, would you do it?"

"I'd let you throat fuck me. I want to gasp for my breath when you finally pull from my mouth."

"Your lips look perfect for my cock, I want to see them wrapped around me as I thrust into your mouth."

"I want you to be as rough as you can, Sammy."

You flipped over to your back once again, your hand dipping into your undies, rubbing soft circles over your clit as you awaited another message. You wanted to invite him over that instant but you had to resist the urge, sexting was fun and a good first step for the two of you.

"I've finally entered the shower, I'm stroking myself to the pictures you sent me. Kinda hard keeping the phone dry."

You laughed a little to yourself at the end of his message.

"Your turn?"

Not that your heart hadn't been pounding the entire time, your recent text made it even faster. You bit your lip in anticipation, you couldn't lie to yourself, you've always wondered what he was packing. And just like that, you revived a picture. Your jaw clenched at his size and width, you weren't entirely sure you'd be able to fit him if you ever got to doing this stuff in person. It was hot and impressive.

"How am I going to fit all of you? I don't think any amount of wetness would prepare me for you."

"We'll make it fit princess, I wanna see your warm pussy stretch around me. Fuuuck, I want you so bad Y/N."

"I want you bad too, maybe our next session can be face to face. I can't imagine how you'll make me feel when I have your hands on me instead of my own."

"You touching yourself right now? I don't remember telling you to stop playing with your tits."

"I couldn't take it anymore, I was aching for some relief."

That was true, your pussy throbbed for attention to the point it hurt to not touch yourself. No one else had this affect over you, making you soak through your lace like nothing.

"Fine, you can touch yourself as long as you don't cum until I allow you, and take it easy, I want you to enjoy this."

"Yes, Sammy."

You slowed down, rubbing slow circles on your aroused clit. Everything was heightened and sensitive, what was he doing to you?

"I'm touching myself, paced instead of rushed. I wish this was your hand. Not gonna lie, I constantly think of how good your large hands would feel on my body."

"Where?"

His response was immediate after he quickly read your message, considering what he told you just a little ago, you knew he was getting off to your little conversation.

"On my ass, in my pussy, around my throat. Even you holding my hands above my head or behind my back sounds like a pleasure. I want you to touch and explore every part of me."

The typing bubble appeared just as it did when he responded to every other text, this time you cut off his response with another one of your own, you wanted to get him really worked up.

"For future reference, I'd probably cum instantly with your tongue on my clit and your fingers in me as deep as they'd go."

You weren't a newbie when it came to sex, you knew what you wanted in the bedroom. Being a hunter and constantly hopping town to town, you had your occasional one night stand to release the stress that came with your job.

"Oh really? You want me buried in you while tasting you all at once? I can do that for you princess, I've been wanting to taste you. I'd eat you out till you came on my tongue then I'd make you kiss me, deep."

"You already know I'd return the favor."

You referred back to your message you sent not long ago about going down on him.

"We haven't even talked about getting to the main act and you've got me almost cumming. I had to slow my pace in order to not finish."

You smirked at his reply, biting your lip with a small groan as you still touched yourself. You were hoping you had the same effect on him that he had on you.

"Let's get onto the main act then. How'd you want to fuck me?"

"I can think of a few ways... But I most definitely want to see myself slide in and out of you. I want to enjoy every bit."

"Maybe my hands holding onto the back of my thighs while laying on my back? Everything would be on display."

"I could put your legs up on my shoulders and get really deep in you. Wouldn't that feel good?"

"I'd be seeing stars. And I would not be able to walk afterwards. Feeling you brush against my cervix repeatedly with your big cock, you're gonna fill me so good."

"Y/N you're gonna make me cum. Speed up."

With his permission, you started to rub faster. You moaned loudly, forgetting about anyone else in the seedy motel.

"Fuck, keep moaning."

You blushed in embarrassment, he could hear you from their rooms bathroom which definitely meant Dean could hear you, the strangers on the opposite side didn't concern you. You allowed yourself to moan with each lap, not holding back the cries. You went on for a minute before diverting your attention back to the phone.

"Imagine how much louder I'd be with you inside me."

"I've been thinking about all the noises you'd be making the entire time. You sound so hot. Are you close?"

"Yeah Sammy, I'm almost there."

Your breathing pattern became rapid and harsh, small wines escaping your lips as you played yourself to perfection.

"Beg for permission to cum."

You groaned at his response.

"Please let me cum, please Sam, I'm not sure I can hold it."

It was hard enough holding back your release but even harder to beg with one hand.

"You can cum baby, just cause you've been so good."

Your body released the tension, the relief rolling in as you came in your panties, finally. It hit you hard, your hips shaking as you moaned louder than earlier. You couldn't deny it, you never orgasmed like that when you were doing it solo.

"I couldn't help but finish to your moans"

His response was like his usual ones, not so formal and more playful. You could get used to seeing both sides regularly.

"We should do this more often, or try it in person, either one"

"I am 100% on board with that"

If for some reason you wanna be notified when I post a new fic, leave a comment to be tagged and your username will go here!

[miss-smutty]

The Destructive Secret

Chapter 7

A/N- I'm back! At least I think I am 😂 I wrote this while I was struggling with writer's block so I don't think it's great but the next chapter I'm working on I feel back to the old me 🥳🤞

Summary- Are your lies finally going to catch up to you?

Word count- 2.8K

Pairing- Chris Hems x reader x Liam Hems

Warnings- Mature themes, cheating, swearing, smut

Strictly 18+ only!

Disclaimer: This is an entire work of fiction/AU and has no affiliation to real life what so ever! This is a fictional story about fictional characters who happen to share names and faces with some real people.

Posted: 2nd Sept 2021

Taglist:- @innerpaperexpertcloud @pandaxnienke @chickensarentcheap @jjpogueprincess @longlostinanotherworld @mostly-marvel-musings @darklydeliciousdesires @monet-belle

The Destructive Secret Masterlist <

The guy turned to leave before looking back over his shoulder at the door, his hand on the door handle.

"If it makes any difference I would choose you over your brother any day." He winked as he left the room.

"What the actual fuck." You shout, storming out of the bathroom in a huff. "There's no way he's gunna stay quiet, it'll be all over the press come tomorrow." You paced the room, your heart beating fast as the adrenaline rushed through you. This was it, this was how it was all going to end. Liam would know as soon as he saw the headlines, all those late night and weekend conferences at the same time as Chris was conveniently away with work.

"To be fair, he does have good taste in men." Chris' usual nonchalance annoyed you, how come he could stay so calm? Why did he make you sound like a crazy person for actually worrying about what might happen.

"It's really not funny Chris, do you want our business known by strangers before we even have chance to speak to Liam and your Mom Chris, she's going to hate me." You feel the warm tears dripping down your cheeks before you even register you're crying. The thought of their mom hating you upsets you more than the thought of Liam hating you. Cathy, their mom was like your own mother, from day one she'd taken you under her wing.

"My Mom would love you no matter what, you know she thinks of you as her own daughter. It's me she's going to blame, Liam's her baby." 

"Yeah you're probably right but still what are we gunna do?" 

"Let's relax babe, you don't know what's going to happen and you can't change it if it does happen so what's the use in worrying about it. Come here."

"You piss me off Chris, you're so laid back. This isn't something you can just sweep under the carpet. It's serious." You needed to take your anger out on him, to let it all out so you could feel better. The four walls of the hotel room were becoming claustrophobic, you wish you could just put your headphones on and just run for a while to clear your head, that's what you usually did.

"I know it is but what can we do? I've done everything we can do, now it's out of our hands. We'll work it out tomorrow, can we enjoy our last night together without all the serious talk?" He raises his eyebrow at you, smiling that sweet, goofy smile of his that has your heart melting.

"You piss me off even more when you look at me like that. I can't stay mad at you and how could I say no to that?" You put your arms around his back, loving the way his height makes you feel so small and safe. He wraps his arms around you, stroking your hair and holding you close.

"That's why I love you yanno." 

"Why?" You ask, looking up at him through your eyelashes, your neck stretching to reach his height.

"Because you never say no." He laughs, a real laugh that you can feel on his toned stomach, shaking against you. It was the best feeling hearing him laugh like that, it'd been so long since you'd heard him laugh. Your life being full of a lot of drama and upset recently that you were appreciative of the little time you had left together.

"Maybe I should start then." You pout pretending to sulk.

"No way, I love how easy you are." He picks you up so you can wrap your legs around him, looking down on him for once. You punch him lightly on his shoulder, still pouting. "Ok, ok I'll stop teasing. You know why I love you though." 

"Tell me." 

He sits down on the end of the bed with you still in his arms, resting on his great big, thick thighs. He moves your hair behind your ears so he can see your face, studying it carefully with a look of adoration in his eyes.

"I love you because you're absolutely drop dead gorgeous, I mean the first time I met you, you literally knocked the air from my lungs. I've been obsessed with you ever since." He shuffles slightly beneath you, getting himself comfy. "This would never have happened with just anyone, I'm not a dick that goes around sleeping with his brothers girls." You give him a questioning look, your eyebrows furrowing. "Seriously, it took fucking everything in me to try and resist you. I'd never felt that before, never been one of them that wants what they can't have. Until I met you. Fuck me you were an absolute bombshell." You frown at him. "Are, still are a bombshell, don't look at me like that." He laughs.

"Tell me more." You whisper, feeling yourself tear up at his revelations as you run your hand through his hair, his eyes closing as you do.

"Am I stroking your ego?" He smiles slyly. "Do you remember the first time you met me?" 

"Of course I do, me and Liam had already been together a year but you'd been in Australia. I was eighteen, young and dumb..."

"And full of..." 

"Do not even finish that sentence, you're ruining the moment." He laughs at you but quickly gets back to being serious.

"You were eighteen and ridiculously mature for your age, I was twenty six and still acted like a teenager. I remember you walking in in that little denim skirt and tank top, smiling at me with that beautiful smile. The first thing I noticed was your eyes, the way they lit up when you smiled. You had me right at that moment, I was smitten. Then you introduced yourself as Liam's girlfriend and my heart sank." 

"I can't believe you remembered what i was wearing, it was twelve years ago." You kiss his forehead, holding his face in your hands. So glad you had the opportunity to talk like this, knowing all this made you know you hadn't made a mistake. "I was so nervous walking up to you, I'd only ever seen you on photos and crushing on you when you were in home and away. Then you're there in front of me looking sexy as hell and I knew I had to make a good impression."

"Little did you know, five years later I'd be bending you over that table and giving you everything you'd been searching for?" He questioned, raising his eyebrow at you with a smirk.

"No, dick! Little did I know you'd sweep me off my feet and make me question everything I ever knew." 

"I am a dick but that's why you love me isn't it?"

"Your ego definitely doesn't need stroking. I fell in love with Liam when I was still a girl and I fell in love with you when I was a woman. People change, needs change and..." 

"And I give you everything you need." His hand travelled to your ass pulling you into him, pressing against his growing erection.

"You do, you need to work on your arrogance though." You laugh. "But seriously I'm done with all this now, we can't go on like this anymore. I want all of you, all of the time."

"So you've made your decision." His lips part, his head resting against your forehead.

"Was there ever any doubt?" You question, running your finger over his lip and grinding against him subtly making him groan.

"Fuck Y/N, I fucking love you so much it's crazy." He says through gritted teeth, holding the small of your back as you raise your hips, your face contorting with need. "What would you do if I asked you to marry me?" His hand travelled down the back of your shorts, cupping your ass in his hands.

"What do you think?" You tease, taking his bottom lip in your teeth and pulling gently.

"I don't know, that's why I'm asking." His face was set seriously, he wasn't joking, he wanted to marry you.

"Of course I'd say yes, once we'd dealt with everything." You smile watching his face light up.

"You're going to be Mrs Hemsworth and mine, not Liam's. I can't fucking wait." He picks you up, gripping your ass making you squeel before planting you back on the bed on your back.

Leaning over you, his palm caressing your stomach, kneeding your breasts with his long fingers. His erection poking into your clothed heat.

"You're so fucking perfect, are you ready to cause destruction?" 

"Like now, in bed or?..." 

"You know what I mean." He laughs, reaching down to attach his lips to your neck, sucking gently.

"If it means I get you then yeah, I'm ready." 

"Right answer. You've made me the happiest fucking man in the world yanno?" His hand moves under your top, pushing it up to your chin as his lips finally meet yours. Kissing you deeply with everything he's got, your body rising from the bed to meet his.

"I think... I can... Make you even happier." You say between kisses, pushing down his boxers, your nails scratching his skin gently as you do. 

He rests on one elbow watching you free his cock from its barrier. You cup his balls in your hand, stroking along the length of his cock with the other. He groans, pushing himself into your hands.

"I'll be happier once I'm buried inside this perfect pussy." He kneels between your legs, pulling your panties off before hovering back over you.

"Go slow baby, I want to feel everything." You whisper.

"Fuck, I can't guarantee how long I'll last." He moans, lining himself up and slipping in making you both moan as his cock stretches your walls perfectly.

He rests on his elbows, holding your face in his hands as he gently thrusts into you, wrapping your legs around him and pushing him in further, deeper. Hitting your spot with the curl of his hips, agonisingly slowly. You look into each others eyes, his forehead resting against yours. Tears in your eyes from the intense intamacy.

"I love you Y/N." He declares gruffly, his voice deep with lust.

"I love you too." You whimper.

Moaning everytime his thighs connected with yours, flesh slapping together, bringing your hips up to meet him. Him grunting with every thrust, your sex noises filling the otherwise silent room. The sound like a symphony to your ears, turning you on even more to hear his exclamations of ecstacy.

"It's always been you Chris." You whisper, making his pace become sloppy, losing his composure and restraint at your words. You can see it on his face as it twists, his cock twitching inside of you.

"Come for me baby." He grits his teeth, the muscles in his jaw tightening as his body goes rigid.

"Ah fuck." He brings you over the edge with the last of his powerful thrusts, your legs shaking around him, the feeling of satisfaction melting through your body simultaneously. A proud look on his face as you both come together and he falls limply onto your sweat laced body.

You stay like that for a while, both enjoying the moment, his cock still twitching inside of you. The heaviness of his body burying you into the mattress but you don't complain.

You don't want him to move, you want to memorise the feel of his heaviness and how his cock feels inside of you. How his rough face feels against your smooth skin, his hair tickling under your chin. You trace the muscles on his back, the defined shoulders and lean waist. Your hands gripping his tight, round ass and you close your eyes, remembering every dip and ripple, dreading the thought of being without him in your arms for at least another couple of weeks.

"I don't know how I'm going to watch you walk away tomorrow." He rolls on to his side, pulling you into him. "I think that's the hardest thing to deal with out of everything."

"I was just thinking the same thing." You looked up at him through your eyelashes, your fingers brushing against his tight pecs. "You know we've been doing this for nearly 6 years now and I don't think I've ever felt as close to you as I do now. It's going to be even harder for me to leave this time." 

"I don't even want to think about it but we only have hours left together, what's our plan?" 

"You mean when and how do we tell Liam?" You ask sitting cross legged in the bed, reality kicking back in. You have to go home to Liam and leave Chris all over again, back to the lies and sneaking about.

"That and when am I going to be able to see you again? I don't want to wait as long as last time, you know how crazy i start getting when I don't see you." 

"We've got your cousin's wedding next week. I'll see you there." You risk a glance at him, pain set on his face.

"You'll see me but you'll be arm in arm with Liam and I'll be alone again." 

"How about once the weddings over and done with, we can tell Liam about us?" You watch his face change, like a little boy.

"A week? I can do that, I think. But I'm not going to the wedding alone." 

"What do you mean? A date? With who?" Panic laced in your voice.

"I don't know but I'm sure I won't be short of options." 

"Are you fucking with me? Liam thinks you're dating a married woman, where you going to find one of those?" 

"I don't know but I'm not turning up to a family party on my own again, my aunties can be fucking brutal." 

"Well don't expect to playing all happy families and me being all nice." You sulk.

"Are you jealous?" 

"Yeah, duhh."

"Come here." He pulls you into arms wrapping his legs around yours. Comfortable silence drifting over you both as he strokes your hair and you fall asleep in his arms.

***********

You wake up in the morning smiling, then remembering what day it is and that you have to leave to go back to boring reality and your smile fades. Chris stirring beside you, his muscly arm resting over your stomach, locking you in place.

"Chris, wake up." You whisper in his ear, admiring his sleepy, perfect face. "It's 9.30 we've gotta check out at 10." He makes an unrecognisable sound of exasperation, his eyes opening, puffy with sleep or lack of in this case.

"Aww man, can't we just stay in bed a little longer, I don't wanna let you go." 

"You need to go check out first so we don't leave the hotel at the same time." 

"Fuck sake. Back to reality it is then." He says all hint of jokiness gone from his tone as he sits up and rubs his eyes. 

"I'm afraid so, I need to go grab my things. Text me when you've left please." 

"Wow! I feel used, do I not even get a kiss before you run out on me?" 

"I was just dealing with the business before I dealt with the pleasure, like I'd just leave without giving you a kiss." You threw yourself on him, wrapping your legs around him as he leant against the headboard. Taking his lips in yours, open mouthed kisses that left you both breathless.

*****

You packed up the couple of things you'd actually taken out of your pull along suitcase, you'd spent most of the weekend naked or slobbing about in Chris' t-shirts so all your clothes were still folded and packed.

You were anxious about going home to Liam and having to pretend again, having to try and not slip up about where you'd actually been. You literally had to go through possible conversations in your mind, conjuring up imagined answers to Liam's possible questions so you didn't get caught out. It was hard work.

Then you got the text from Chris telling you he was out of the hotel and on the road back home, followed by how much of a good weekend he'd had and how much he loves you.

You couldn't help having a spring to your step as you walked through the lobby, a weekend full of love making and reminiscing would have that effect on anyone.

After you'd checked out, the anxiety set in, like stepping out of this hotel would be like stepping in to an alternate universe. A universe that wasn't simple and easy like it had been this weekend but stepping through those revolving doors would mean that will all end. This safe feeling of being alone, away from prying eyes would end as soon as you stepped foot outside and it did, a ominous feeling sweeping over you, goosebumps covering your flesh. Maybe you conjured up the feeling in your own mind, manifesting it into existence but you couldn't shake it.

A feeling of being watched, was it your imagination or not? You didn't know, all you knew was how much you wanted to get out of public and back home. As you stood in front of the hotel, picking up your suitcase to carry it down the stairs, something caught your eye. A flash. And then another flash coming from your peripheral.

[procrastination-queenie]

Cheater || JHS

Pairing: Husband!au Hoseok x Pregnant wife!au Reader.

Synopsis: You're mad at your husband for something he didn't do.🤷🏽‍♀️

Warning: None. The reader is emotional because of pregnancy hormones.

Word count: 1,415.

Looking to when you were younger and reflecting now on your present you would consider yourself and your mum to be the best of friends. Thank God for having a healthy relationship with your parents; this allowed you to remember some of your heart-warming and funny moments that you've experienced with them. Your mum was and still is like any other woman who has a daughter would sometimes talk to you about how her day went, what made her happy, what made her super mad and so on, so it was not strange to confide in you with the silliest things that bothered her deeply. One of which those things that you oh so prayed to never pick up from her was how she tended to get suspicious of your dad because of a bad dream she has had.

"I think your dad is cheating on me!" She said, eyes widening, gazing at nothing probably recalling the events in her head.

"What makes you think that?" You asked turning upon hearing her sudden confession.

"I dreamt about it!" She answered you back with this certain tone as if to say 'duh' minus the eye roll.

Of course, it was not enough evidence to start doubting your dad, plus you assured her that your dad would never do such a thing because you knew him like the back of your hand. So, the matter would be brushed off with some laughter, joking about the whole thing with an "I can't believe you, mum!" Sometimes, after these little outbursts, if you may call it that, you prayed for your future-self to not be like your mum or like those women who suddenly think suspiciously of their partners because of a dream. It's not that there was something wrong about it; you just simply found it to be silly, and you didn't need to frighten off the opposite sex; it's enough how they freak out when you question them about the date of the day, and they start stuttering feeling like it's an important date that they've forgotten about and how they will never hear the end of it. So, you trusted your future-self to be the open-minded person you expected her to be and not get mad over such mundane things.

This; however, could not be applied to your state right now because fast forward a few years from that moment you've shared with your mum, here you are heavily pregnant during the last days of your 2nd trimester, washing the dishes with so much anger radiating off you as if the dishes were to blame for your current state. You feel so disappointed for letting down your younger-self; however, you can't shake off the feeling of betrayal and distress right now.

Poor Hoseok didn't know how to approach you since you woke up today with that attitude of yours, brushing it off as your pregnancy hormones, and that you were probably getting tired of carrying all that load around. He couldn't imagine the discomfort you were feeling, yet the alarming sound of the China dishes, that you both bought together before your wedding, being treated harshly made him sink into the sofa deeper and deeper hoping that it would somehow swallow him, shielding him from any possible outbursts, until your not so silent tantrum is over. This kind of behaviour confused him, it really did because your attitude screamed 'I AM MAD, AREN'T YOU GOING TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT?' but then again he remembers every single time he has tried to approach you since this morning to find out what's wrong, only to be met with the bloody red eyes of Scarlett the witch, something that definitely made him rethink the decision of approaching you in the first place. Nevertheless, the way that you slammed the plates and cups made him worry that you might hurt yourself in the process of trying to calm down by slamming everything you laid hands on.

Sighing, talking himself into why he can't back out now from talking to you, he reluctantly got up and walked towards you with a smile on his face that clearly displayed 'Please don't kill me,' on his features. "Babe do you need any hel-"

"BACK OFF, YOU CHEATER!" Your sudden outburst scared him before his face turned pale like a lily flower withering. Cheater? "How could you do this to me?" Putting down the dish that occupied your hand and the sponge that you were using. Hoseok ran over to you from behind the counter that he agreed with himself, during his pep talk before he approached you, to stand behind in case you decided to throw something at him. He turned off the faucet and turned you towards him so that you were facing him. "Y/n, what are you talking about?" He asked wiping away your tears. Cheater? Was some article released about him having an affair? Did someone tell you something? Did you misunderstand a photo that was probably taken of him with a fellow female artist that may have raised speculations? Because as far as your husband is aware he didn't drunkenly cheat on you, and he would never do such a thing because you were the love of his life. Why would he cheat on you? Hoseok was trying to calm you down so that you can answer the questions that were plaguing his mind in order for him to fix any misunderstanding if there's any.

"Tell me, do you love her that much to the point that you would leave your pregnant wife and run away with her? Huh?" You said looking at your husband, accusation burning through your eyes. "What?! Who are you even talking about?" Hoseok frowned reaching his peak of confusion.

"Amanda Seyfried!" You burst again looking at him as if how could he not know something like that.

Hoseok looked at you in disbelief, he has never in his entire life met Amanda Seyfried, yes he mentioned once before in an interview that she was his celebrity crush, and that was even before he met you, so he didn't understand what all the hype was about. "Babe, I've never met her! How could you accuse me of cheating on you with her when I never met her before?"

"I dreamt about it! Last night, you to-told me that you d-didn't love me anymore and that you're better off with her. Y-y-you also said that you wanted blond and blue-eyed b-babies!" You explain crying, again as you recalled the pain that you felt during the nightmare. It felt so real that you woke up with a pounding heart and teary eyes. "Why would I say that?" Hoseok stifled a laugh, reminding himself that these are just your hormones getting the best of you and that you're never like this. "Because you want your babies to look like her, the love of your life, that's what you said," you sniffed, wiping your eyes and nose. Hoesok laughed as he couldn't contain it anymore, "why are you laughing?" You pouted, frowning your eyebrows trying to look mad at him. "Baby, I would never, ever leave you for Amanda Seyfried," he laughed, pulling you into a warm hug to ease your nerves. "But it felt so real, it felt like you were really leaving me to be with her!" You pouted as you were about to cry again, making Hoseok take your face between his hands, thumb brushing your cheeks gently to calm you down. "I am so sorry baby you felt like that," he said pulling you in his arms, again. His heart clenched at your distress. "Come on, let's go sit down, you've been standing for too long," he said walking you slowly towards the sofa. Hoseok sat down as he laid your head on his lap, caressing your hair softly as you both watched the t.v. "y/n!" You hummed looking up at him. "I don't want blond and blue-eyed babies," he said smiling down at you. "You don't?" You asked softly, eyes filled with hope, like a kid on Christmas eve that hopes his name would be on Santa's list of the well-behaved children, as he told you so. "No, I don't." He answered shaking his head to put your thoughts at ease. "Good! Otherwise, you'd be dead!" Hoseok laughed at your sudden change of attitude, portrayed in your sharpe tone, knowing that you were not talking seriously and that it's just your hormones.

[retphienix]

It's been 6 years :)

On March 30th, 2015 I decided I wanted a gaming side blog. (so we're early, but shush, it's the month for me)

I didn't know what I'd use it for exactly, but I had ideas- something I always have even if most of them only get as far as daydreamin' or writing out before closing them :P

For proof on the lack of direction the blog initially had- the March 30th date is the anniversary of my first post, an in-depth and lengthy review of Dragon Warrior Monsters for the GBC.

If you know the blog then you know "Extremely long and in-depth reviews" aren't the norm around here. As a matter of fact, that first post is the ONLY one I've done!

The closest I've come to ever repeating that would be the (word of the day) Directionless video I put out on Hades to get a grip on the concept of making videos, but that wasn't nearly as much of a 'review' as that first post is.

Tangent, definitely planning on trying my hand at videos some more for the foreseeable future. Probably not gonna use the tagline Full Impressions that I tossed as a whim for the Hades video but yeah- I'm excited to try my hand at a few videos :) tangent over.

It didn't take me long to come up with what I'd like to do for the blog though :)

A few months later I liveblogged a challenge run of FFT where I used only Ramza- a solo run. - Which maybe only happened because I tried a nuzlocke run a year prior on my main account-

(Nuzlocke | FFT challenge run)

Thanks to that haphazard liveblog experiment I started to realize a couple things which became the primary motivators behind this blog.

1) I LOVE sharing experiences. No brainer, I'm sure, but being able to share my experiences, and compare them with others' experiences, and just that mutual sharing is uplifting and feels good to do.

2) Liveblogging is an EXCEPTIONAL motivator to buckle down and play all those games I said I'd play (cue everyone laughing because I'm still way behind and have an immeasurable backlog).

But I mean that, on both respects. I have plenty of motivators toward the blog today, but if I were to be concise it's pretty much "It's easier to beat games if I liveblog them- otherwise I get distracted and play other games" and "I love sharing experiences and thoughts with people about my favorite thing- games."

Since 2015 I've tackled around 70 games as full playthroughs, and an untold ton as one offs or just to ramble about for a bit.

I've had a lot of highlights over the years, and I don't talk much about it as an overall experience so I thought for the anniversary I'd try to do just that. Not everything- I can't say I have photographic memory that would bring all of it up without prompting after all :P But whatever comes to mind as I browse some of my old stuff- as well as some thoughts on what I'd like to see in the future.

It's gonna be a bit self-centric I assume as I type this preamble to it, so let me say outright that this blog wouldn't be half of what it is without all the people who've given it the time of day over the years.

From recommending games they love or appreciate, to comparing thoughts, to offering kind words for analysis I've done over the years, to pointing out when I'm dumb and misread a situation :P- to, yes, even the people who decided "Fuck this guy's ramble" and deleted my captions before reblogging my gifs way back during Hamtaro (Of COURSE I remember that! It's amusing lol).

This is better because of others, because of the interactions and the people I've gotten the chance to chat with or befriend. It's just a liveblog more or less, my own little bit of fun I toss out for myself if for anyone- so seeing others enjoy this or that from the work I put into sharing my experiences or thoughts is always a joy in itself :)

Anyway, onto selfishly rambling about some tidbits of the past :)

Also sorry but no, opted to not shove a ton of photos in, it does have a handful of links to old posts though :P

This'll be disorganized as heck as I'll add to it over time before I feel it's worth posting (or the tumblr post editor becomes a hassle and more or less forces me to).

First~

FFT Solo Ramza Challenge: Considering it was roughly the first thing this blog has done, it's also something that's stuck in my head a lot more clearly than most of the other stuff I've done to be honest lol.

In truth, this is partially because FFT is my favorite game, bar none. But it's also because the whole experience was pretty new to me. Prior to it I had really only done one self-imposed-challenge that wasn't requested by the game in some manner and that was a nuzlocke run of Blue version.

So adding a challenge to my favorite game was a fantastic experience!

Notes I just wanted to say today about that run: If anyone enjoys FFT I honestly recommend giving it a shot for the unique story it lends itself to. I do recommend skipping the rules until after the second battle but that's up to YOU to decide.

My first post on the subject is me complaining about spending 4 hours grinding out the second fight and, despite hyperbole being my natural state, that was NOT hyperbole.

It DID take 60~ restarts to beat. It DID take 4 hours. The reason is that that 2nd battle is RNG as HECK, you HAVE to have Delita do some meaningful actions, you HAVE to have the enemies miss and make poor plays, you damn near HAVE to crit a few instances to save yourself from taking too much damage.

It's a numbers game to the extreme, so I wouldn't fault anyone for 'cheating' and skipping the 2nd fight for the ruleset lol.

The memory that stands out the most for that run is actually isolated in a post in which Ramza (Purrick in this run) talks like a total badass as just ONE DUDE running into a room full of enemies. I just think on that as a great encapsulated view of what it was like. The run started off face grindingly difficult, but because FFT is a game that offers so much freedom to the player it was extremely easy to 'break' the game into making Purrick overpowered as hell.

That's something I love about some tactical RPGs, I love having the ability to play smart so that I can play stupid later on, and breaking the game into making him one shot god is certainly a good payoff for playing smart early on :P

RetQuick: I miss RetQuick, it was primarily a short experiment I did in 2015 where I'd play a game for a short span of time (REALLY short, like 10-20 minutes) and record that for the purpose of making gifs and saying a short piece on what I thought.

It's one of those formats where the purpose was pretty shallow- but had a reason. I wanted to try making some gifs with some tools that existed online, so I made an excuse to do just that.

I also wanted to play a TON of games, usually through emulation on my sister's PSP, and this let me do that.

These two minor goals came together and so I spent a while making RetQuicks which were honestly more fun to make than they had any right to be. I mean the gifs were tedious but the playing? The thought sharing? The end product ocassionally having more appeal than just a photoset? It was fun.

I'm thinking whenever I have trouble picking a game for the blog I'll revisit the format... sorta.

I already reused it for a short stint to show clips I had no plan on expanding into a playthrough, but that died as well as it was too similar to Tidbits posts (another tag I no longer really use).

My thought is to rebrand retquick as something of a tryout for what game comes next. Play a handful of my backlog games for an hour or so each and say some thoughts before saying which one I'll continue as the main game for that period of time.

Old Tag Stuff: One of those things that only sticks to me since I made the decisions but it's always funny for me to look back on my old posts because I was apprehensive as hell toward making my posts visible. The reason my early playthroughs on the My-Tags page are variants of Ret instead of just "The name of the game so people can find this post" is because I felt like a liveblog would just spam the tag to hell-

Something I don't remotely feel bad for doing anymore.

So I avoided getting any sort of spotlight for quite a while on the blog for little reason.

Why Retphienix?: This is just a dumb thought I wanted to share and I'm sure I've said before.

It stands for retro!

Yeah!

Ain't that dumb and also not a real shorthand? lol

I think I have some sort of deer in headlights anxiety towards naming things, I mean do you think I think Full Impressions is a good summation for a video? I don't. But perhaps that's overshadowed by the other inexperiences and anxiety driven decisions that had- doesn't matter.

Retphienix is Retphienix because I sat there in 2015 and thought "Well... what do I name an alt account?"

My main is Redphienix, which yes, is ALSO a terrible name AND is misspelled. But it's that because of sentimental reasons. As a kid I misspelled Redphoenix when making my gamertag (I knew how to spell Phoenix back then as well, I was too excited about xbox live and misspelled it) and it's become something of a sentimental misspelling.

So I wanted to make a mix on that for my game blog, but I had no idea what. In the end I thought "RetroPhienix? I don't know. Retphienix is closer to Redphienix. I'll do that" and so it was done.

And just like how Redphienix is both bad and misspelled but exists because of sentimental reasons- Retphienix has acquired the same 'flavor' in my eye lol.

Aspirations for the blog: I have no immediate ramp up plans or road map or whatever, and in truth I'll be happy if the blog stays just as it is forever- up until tumblr ends- I cry over lost posts- and I reopen it on another platform.

But I do have blurry half-considered daydreams that I'd like to see happen for the blog through some hard work or shifts on my part.

One is something I'm already doing kinda, hence my embarrassing means of bringing it up a lot lately. Videos- I want those. I wanna make some looks back on series people don't talk about that I enjoy, I want to make videos sharing my thoughts on games I beat for the blog (like what full impressions kinda was, but I don't think they'll have a unified name from here on out). Maybe retrospectives, but mostly when I think of making a video tied to retphienix or me in general it's me looking at a game that said something to me, and saying it louder with my own interpretations on it.

You know the kind, videos where they talk about a video game but not the whole thing- just a singular message they really heard loud and clear from it intentionally or not. I dig those and I know I end a lot of games having plenty to say that could be directed into such a format.

We'll see.

And I'm along for the ride on that one as well- currently I'm keeping my eyes on whatever is directly next, which happens to be "I plan on playing Omori, if it clicks as something to talk about I would like to take a shot at that in a video too!"

The other is that I'd like to build a small community. Wouldn't know the first thing on doing that in a modern sense, but just a little online friend group to chat with and play games together. Something that could open up multiplayer and coop experiences being better shared on the blog and would just in general expand my gaming to what it used to be back on the 360 when I had a large group to play with.

Since the 360 era ended I've pretty much closed off- stopped playing competitive games due to lack of interest- and slowed down to playing all games either solo, with randoms (and no mic usually), or with my cousin. It's a rare instance when I play with some good people like @gamesception or another friend of mine, John.

When I diverted from playing competitive games nonstop toward other genres I didn't intend to also cut out all my online gaming buds, it just kinda happened, and I never really put any effort into rectifying that.

So more or less I'd like to one day sit down and work on a discord server, and then buck up and put the leg work in to make some gamin' buds again, but that's such a vague concept anymore.

Sounds all sad and what not but it's more ambivalent, I made decisions that

changed how gaming worked for me after the 360 and this is just where it landed for better and worse- I'd just like to see if I can make it a little better :P

General things I think when I think retphienix: Honestly? I think of how much fun I've had over the years and how thankful I am to have had an outlet that encouraged me to explore more of the medium.

I REALLY love games. I went to college for games, I've written LEAGUES about games, I've played countless games, my childhood was games, my adult life is games- games games games yada yada yada.

So when I think of retphienix I think of how without it I probably wouldn't have explored a lot of the corners of gaming that I have.

I genuinely, and I mean this, might not have sat down and beaten FF7 for myself and would have considered the amount I played as a kid to be enough.

I might not have played Chrono Trigger yet, and I KNOW I wouldn't have played Chrono Cross, and I'm happy as hell to have played both of those. CT was a mind blowing moment for me that showed me just how good an RPG can be, and CC gave me miles to think of in terms of innovating an RPG and how beholden to the narrative a sequel should be (I don't feel CC should have been chrono at all lol).

I DEFINITELY wouldn't have given New Vegas another chance. And I know I'm a sourpuss on NV, I've been that way since I maxed my achievements on the 360 for it, but replaying it really did reveal to me how exceedingly negative I was being.

My memories had become "It's brown and a boring location >:(" and "The factions all suck and it doesn't do anything with the idea of bad factions >:(" and became "It's... a little brown guys, not a big fan of the area" and "They didn't do enough with exploring the gray factions" while adding "Wait. This is pretty damn fun. And 90% of the additions are stellar. And I forgot about Dead Money, my favorite dlc in any game ever with a story that tears at my heart every time I think of it, NV good actually?"

Faxanadu would have remained a cool game I saw on SSFF and not a game I played to the end and fell in love with the aesthetic feel it has!

Also that's a game I cheated like crazy on lol, I would do it again! Save state scumming games meant to be rudely difficult is only fair :P

I probably would have never sat down to play through Windwaker which was such a positive and uplifting experience that I now get the most relaxed and warm feeling in my heart when I see those blue waves.

There's so many experiences I would have left on the table in favor of like... putting more hours into a live service title or something.

Maybe, and no offense to my cousin or anyone else playing it, but maybe I'd be no-lifing World of Warcraft nonstop just stagnating my interest toward the skinner box mechanics of an MMO?

Some offense, actually but lightheartedly lol.

But beyond the entire games I've played for the blog, when I think retphienix I picture all the time making gifs, all those games I played on the PSP for short stints, buying a retron 5 to add to what I could explore and being stoked when they shipped a freebie box of old controllers to go with it, getting angry at the retron for being a Piece Of Shit lol, crying at the end of damn near every game with an emotional story because I'm a big emotional mess of a person who finds investing and crying at a story way too easy thanks to empathy pulls, oh!-

Getting excited whenever I found that I had a "*controversial*" opinion that no one would care about lol. Like the one that comes to mind is that I thoroughly believe that Dragon Ball Z II: Gekishin Freeza!! for the NES is WAY better than the fandom recognized and appreciated sequel/remake Dragon Ball Z: Legend of the Super Saiyan!

How many people do you hear talking about either game, let alone saying the NES game that is roughly half of the SNES remake is the better one :P But I stand by that! The SNES one is a remake of DBZ1 and 2 for the NES but it loses all the charm and some of the fun of the NES ones by being a lackluster SNES game!

lol

I admitted wholeheartedly that this post would be a lit-

little directionless (gotta love the new tumblr poster making me break sentences like that), but to sum things up.

It's been 6 years. It's been an untold amount of work to be honest- liveblogging a game, at least for me, hasn't been the easiest thing. It's a lot of thinking out my thoughts (heh), it's a lot of learning tools to make the capturing process possible, it's a lot of experimenting, it's a lot of writing and editing, and, well, sometimes it's just tough.

I mean I went to school for coding, not video editing, not writing, not image processing, not this or that- but this hobby has introduced a lot of things even if only at a VERY base level (I admit fully to using online alternatives to make gifs for instance).

I learned a lot about, well, a lot of things in order to use this blog to learn more about games- and all that work has become part of why I've loved all 6 years of this blog.

6 years of gaming, work, and you all- and it's been worth the investment :) Here's to many more and all of you whether you stumble upon this post or not- literally anyone who's interacted in these 6 years, thank you, and anyone who hasn't I offer you well wishes as well.

<3

[fictional-worlds-are-exquisite]

i am very much enjoying my vague void! it's currently blasting hozier at full volume and that's almost louder than my internal screaming (don't worry, everything is fine, i just saw a spider)

i've never once in my life have followed a recipe correctly. all of my measurements are completely random and whatever happens happens. it is no longer in my hands. whatever eldritch entities exist take the wheel. and i absolutely refuse to spell anything in english without autocorrect because y'all have way too many double letters and random vowel placement

thank you! sadly, i won't have a break right now, because we just had christmas vacations, but the start of the new semester is always pretty chill. and you're absolutely right, i should take up necromancy! the snow and the cold will add to my mysterious vibes. i just need to get a big black cape with a hood to complete the aesthetic

i definitely picture everything above 5'6 feet as the same height. 5'7 and 6'2? the exact same thing. no difference here

how is morepork a real bird name. it's just... more pork? but the bird is magnificent. i completely approve of your first order as bird queen, not that you need approval from mere peasants like me, but it's a great order. ohhh salps look really cool, and it does look a lot like it! when you said boob implant i thought of mermaids and them using salps as boob implants but then i realised wait wouldn't jellyfish be better for that? because of their shape? ignoring their little leggies they're quite boob shaped, no? and then i realised that i was thinking about mermaids and alive boob implants... if i had to think it, you have to read it. i'm sorry

i was sold before but now i'm even more sure that i want to hire you. and I'll make sure to have lactose free cheese for the backflips (unless you want the lactose version? i'm not judging). will the biting of ankles cost extra?

that sounds like a brilliant set-up for a horror movie where they kill off all the children one by one. it's absolutely horrifying. if something like that would've happened to me i would've most likely just passed out. whatever happens afterwards is not my problem. and now i really don't want to know what the hell your leg was caught on because that seems like knowledge that would get me killed

ah so you're a fellow dirt eater? according to my mom my favourite thing to do outside when i was a little kid used to be eating sand. just shovelling handfuls of it into my mouth and crying when my mom made me spit it out. which i refuse to believe. if there are no photos it didn't happen

you warm climate people are starting to make me think that i'm better adjusted to the cold than i thought i am! it's either that or our buildings are better heated. i definitely don't know if anyone else calls hot water bottled hotties but i like it so from now on i'm using it

that's so cute! i was clearly a way more selfish child because when i found any amount of money i just kept it and bought candy as soon as i could. i clearly couldn't save money then and i can't now. we have stores like that (or i'm assuming that they're like that solely based on how they sell lollies) and they used to be my favourite thing because you could get so many lollies for such a small price!! and my mom even used to let me order for myself sometimes so i always felt like a very big girl jsjshsbsjk

also the fact that i can't send pictures on anon is a crime (yes i know why and it's good that that's not possible because can you imagine anons being able to send pictures? oh no is all i have to say about it) but anyways. because i have this one super cursed photo that reminded me of you and now i can't share it :((

duuuuude, sick void bro. sounds like a vibing void. I feel like I haven’t seen a spider in awhile. Other than daddy long legs. But they’re chill. They mind their own business. 

I nearly always follow recipes exactly. My mum is like oh cook this for about 7 minutes? Yeah sure. I’ll take a wild guess. I’m like they say exactly 7 minutes so I’ll set a timer for 7 minutes and start a stopwatch so if it does seem to need more than 7 I can keep an eye on the extra time and be aware of exactly how long it takes me for next time. Other people are like oh let's see I have [lists 5-10 things in their fridge], hmm...oh I know what I could make with that! I’m like I have beans in my freezer because one recipe required them and no other recipes I know how to make do so what am I supposed to do with these now,,, this is stressful,,, basically I barely know how to cook and recipes are the only things saving me in that area. That is entirely fair. Except for the fuck duck, and murder is not the word you want surely, situations, it’s pretty helpful.

Ohhh I see. At least the start is chill! For a little! Before your entire situation spirals out of hand and you’re behind in every class and it’s taken you a whole day to read 10 pages and you’re exhausted and it’s only week 2. Just me? ok. fair. anyway. I want a cloak so bad. One of my uni friends tempted me to class because she said she was wearing a cloak so my depressed ass honest to god dragged myself out of bed and to said class just to see it. It was worth it. They’re incredible. Everyone should own a big cloak for the aesthetic.

I’m glad it isn’t just me hahaha. I can visualise my own height in feet but everything else is just the same size that is a vague amount taller than me, mentally.

It’s also known as the ruru. But the name morepork amuses me. It’s named after the call it makes haha. It does sound like it’s asking for more pork if you know to listen for that. thank u for ur approval, it means a lot, turns out becoming bird queen didn’t ACTUALLY get rid of my anxiety disorder weirdly enough so validation is great! lmaooo. What if the jellyfish stung them tho? At least salps wouldn’t do you dirty like that. The mermaids would just look like there are hundreds of bugs crawling around in their boobs, flesh shifting as they float around. Which is a vibe. If you’re into that. Jellyfish WOULD make a more solid, single, implant, some of them are definitely boob shaped. But that’s kinda boring no one’s gonna be traumatised by that. Salps on the other hand...yeah, that sight will DEFINITELY traumatise someone.

To be PERFECTLY honest I haven’t done a backflip in years but for lactose-free cheese? Dude. I’ll be going back to training. Gonna be the best backflip you’ve ever seen. As long as it’s not Tasty cheese I am content, but lactose free IS better. The biting of ankles will not cost extra, it is a pleasure to be allowed to do that.

Oh it absolutely would be. It’d be very funny if it reached the wider world bc people would probably be like ok but who would send kids into the bush like that,, it’s an odd concept. meanwhile everyone who grew up in nz is gonna be like y’all, you’re not gonna fuckin BELIEVE what i experienced growing up, it’s real dude. On one hand, I feel like murdering kids in a movie is questionable, on the other hand, It exists, so maybe people would be down for it. I feel like it’d be a good concept even if it wasn’t murdery tho. Like psychological horror? I’m not sure if I’m using that category correctly I don’t watch much horror. A kid following the rope but then being shifted into a different horror dimension but they never take the blindfold off because their teachers said not to and they’d probably have to let go of the rope to do it...I feel like this could work super well as a short film. The viewers see everything. The child just knows something is off and no one is coming when they call for help. I am so down for this. I also do not want to know what my leg was caught on. Some things I am better off not knowing.

yes! I am a fellow dirt eater! We had a sandpit at home (that’s a little bold. It was a large plastic shell that my parents filled with sand. technically a sandpit. but not fancy sdflsdkfsdf) but I don’t think I ever tried to eat it. Then again, I possibly did and just don’t remember because there’s no photo evidence of that one. I’d have to ask my parents sdfhsjdfs, I would however fully believe them if they said yes. it’s very characteristic of me. I don’t doubt it for a second. muuuum that’s my emotional support sand don’t make me spit it out smh the disrespect these days.

Oh I’m absolutely terrible even by most people’s standards around here when it comes to cold and hot temperatures. I remember sitting in the sun in my school shirt and school jersey in summer on a blazing day like it’s a bit chilly, isn’t it? Meanwhile my friends were in the shade absolutely dying from the heat. Likewise in winter I’d be shivering, teeth chattering, dying with my long sleeve thermal, my school shirt, my school jersey, my school jacket, my longs, warm socks and sneakers and gloves and school scarf while ppl would be walking around in a shirt and shorts like it’s a bit warm this winter huh? my body didn’t learn how to thermoregulate and it shows. But yeah NZ does also have a reputation for shittily insulated buildings and such. It shows. skhdfsfs if it’s not common use maybe don’t say can i have a hotty to someone without context but otherwise go ahead lmao. it’s a fun shortened version.

I was typically a very good saver, to the point where my extended family started gifting me gift cards and vouchers for Christmas and my birthday because if they just gave me money I’d put it in my bank account to save towards uni once I hit like, 12 years old. Which I think was a smart move. But apparently, I’m supposed to buy myself ‘something nice’ with it. I think I’m still an okay saver but I’m not as strict anymore. I’m aware of how much I can spare and I’m not just like you can never get anything for yourself ever, so I do get lil things for myself sometimes. oooo yay! At least you know what I mean. But yes. They were the gold mine for lollies. Absolutely terrific stores. My mum would be like hey lindsey how about you order? And I’d be like mother, I am 7 years old and I have an undiagnosed anxiety disorder everyone assumes is child shyness why would you think I would want to do that. Instead I will whisper my choices to you. After therapy tho I felt pretty rad for picking my own lollies by myself. I was like 13 at that point but sdfkjhsdf listen I got there in the end.

sdfkjsdfkjhsdf I like that a cursed photo reminded you of me. That’s all I need to hear. Tumblr said no anon dick pics but they also said no anon cursed photos either,,, very sad. for the latter part. the first part thank god. If I could turn on photos on anon I absolutely would just to see this but I don’t think I can :(