#i know i said this already and then DIDN'T but i will at LEAST get this thing to the edit stage within the week i SWEAR
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elsa-fogen · 3 days ago
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Yep. Yeah. That's me. Almost all of it, except, i sleep well (if i manage to fall asleep) Reblogging because maybe some of you didn't know (i also didn't know)
Story time!
Too long don't read: used to sleep on private math lessons because i hate math; it takes hours for me to fall asleep WHEN I SUPPOSED TO, and my sister does it in 3-5 minutes.
I was studying at university and we had MATH there I've always had problems with it. since 5th grade i think (well, i hated math before too but real problems started there) when i changed schools and the new class was behind what I've already studied and i didn't pay attention, until i realized that at some point I was behind. I said "welp, i guess it's to late to try, so fuck it"
So at university we had this very high level math and i just couldn't understand a thing (and we had an awful teacher who was saying evvvvery time something like "yall getting expelled, we're all gonna die") so i decided "if i don't understand, fuck it then, i will not even try" and started skipping math classes.
But i STILL had to pass an exam, we were getting 3 tries and if you fail you're getting expelled. I failed first two what a surprise (i don't know how i managed to pass it after all, i can't remember SHIT, only that i is fucking non-existing number which is square root of -1. Why on earth would you need it i have NO fucking clue.
So i had personal teachers who tried to make me understand at least something to pass the exam. And there was one i remember very well, i even remember that we paid her 10$ per hour (for us that was quite a lot). And i remember her because i was SLEEPING. I just COULDN'T keep my eyes opened. She explains something about deviding by zero and my brain draws the fucking universe collapsing in front of my eyes. She gives me some task, I'm trying to write something and I'm falling asleep and DREAMING about writing, then ahe wakes me up and i see that i didn't write SHIT. It all ended when in the middle of lesson she just kicked me out.
And, what a miracle, I'm leaving her apartments and suddenly, all the sleepiness just wanishes! I'm walking home, thinking about some another AU of mine, roleplaying it with myself in my head, full of energy again.
That's not the only case of this, but it's the strongest i ever felt. But that like happens all the time, EVEN WHEN MY MOM OR MY GRANNY COMES TO ME AND START TALKING ABOUT SOMETHING I'M NOT INTERESTED, IM YAWNING AND FEEL URGE TO FALL ASLEEP. But the moment they leave, It goes away! I was calling it work allergy LMAO
I was diagnosed with adhd in my early childhood (there was also something about epilepsy, but it's ok now so it doesn't matter), not long ago i brought this fact back into my active memory (thanks to Jaiden animations ADHD video for that xD) i kinda used to myself by now and now I'm trying to catch and analyse all moments of adhd kicking in. I know my own tricks and buttons, how to make myself do the thing or just how to force myself into doing something. Because i know if i start, I'll probably lock in and won't get up until it's done (well, if i have at least a tiny bit of interest in that thing, or else i won't), and i hate it when someone interrupts me in the middle of the process. No mom, i can't come right now, i can't finish it later, because i either spend few more hours forcing myself to go back to the task or just forget about it.
But i didn't know that this sleepiness was a legit symptom! I just thought that it's exaderated boredom, that's it, had a joke name for it. That's... Funny to know that this thing is actually also adhd moment.
Also, about sleeping. I have problems falling asleep. I may lie in the bed for hours without even my phone, just rotating my stories in my head, and when i don't have a story to think about, this is just the name of my current hyperfixation with different tones and in different random dialogues that doesn't even make sense. I have no idea how to fall asleep, except when i didn't sleep for like 48 hours (EVEN THEN IT MIGHT BE A PROBLEM AND I START THINKING OF THAT CREEPY PRION SICKNESS AND SCARE MYSELF AGAIN). And my mom told me that it have always been like that with me. She and my dad had the whole ritual to make me fall asleep. Dad would hold me in his arms, his head with me covered with a blanket that i could only see his face (or else I would look everywhere and never fall asleep), and rock me for HOURS while i was SCREAMING and CRYING the whole time like i was tortured. But when I'd finally fall asleep, they could be as loud as usual and didn't have to whisper, because wake me up is a whole different story. And my mom was SHOCKED when all it took to make my sister fall asleep was just pet her back for 3-5 minutes.
I don't think of myself as... Sick or ill. That's how i was all my life, i don't know anything else. That's not a sickness to me, that's just part of my personality. Maybe sometimes some parts of it bite me in the ass and make my life harder, but i don't know other life. That's the only one I've got, and i guess I'm fine with that (tho now that i think about it, i need to pay more attention to how i write the characters, and don't make them all ADHDshers LOL i need to study neurotypical people under a microscope 🔬🔍)
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bro im gonna CRY i didnt know this 🥺
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cobaltperun · 1 day ago
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Tara who has a crush on the cute barista reader??? Love your fics
5 Times You Made Coffee and 1 Time You Didn't
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(Request) Tara Carpenter x GN! Reader
Masterlist
Word count: 3.1k
Tara knew she should have been more careful, she knew she should have been cautions of every stranger. First Amber and Richie, then Quinn and Ethan, and she shivered at the very thought if how many times Sidney got betrayed and targeted.
But you were so cute. With that smile, standing out from all the polite smiles of the other barista. And you made perfect coffee, so perfect she now made it her mission to bring as many people, which admittedly and given her social circle wasn't all that many, to your coffee shop when it was your shift.
This time she was here with Mindy, after a long day of classes. "Good afternoon," you smiled at Mindy and then turned toward Tara. "Tara," your already warm smile widened and she almost thought she didn't even need coffee after the burst of energy she got just from seeing you.
"Hey, Y/N," she smiled back at you, hoping her crush wasn't that obvious.
“The usual?” you asked her and she nodded, you’ve been making a cappuccino for her for weeks now and it didn’t take you long to figure out that was her coffee of choice. “And for you?” you turned to Mindy.
“Could I get an espresso?” Mindy asked and you nodded.
“Right away,” you backed away and Tara looked down, blushing at Mindy’s questioning look.
“Spill it, T,” Mindy demanded and pointed at you in the most obvious way. “You have a crush on them and it’s visible from a plane.”
She didn’t have to put it like that. “I just think they are cute,” she didn’t deny her crush. “I just have a good feeling about them, you know?” and she knew a good feeling wasn’t enough anymore, but she had to believe it would be enough this time.
Mindy opened her mouth but then changed her mind and instead just hummed. “Let’s judge their coffee making skills first, you’ll be needing someone who can get your coffee just right,” Mindy grinned and Tara was happy Mindy was the first to find out about you. She knew Chad had a bit of a crush on her, and Sam was… well, Sam, she was protective.
“It’s better than just right,” she assured her of your skills, that was the one thing she couldn’t deny no matter what. You got it just right when she first tried it, and she just asked for a pinch of cocoa powder the second time and since then the cappuccino you made her was flawless.
Before her and Mindy could even start talking you came with their coffees and Tara reached for her wallet. “It’s taken care of,” you winked at her and walked over to the other table before she could say anything. Tara watched you, speechless, as she always was when you just told her the coffee was on the house.
Somehow, she was sure it had nothing to do with your parents owning the place. You would have treated her even if you just worked there.
“You weren’t kidding, they know how to make coffee,” Mindy commented as she took a sip of her espresso.
“Mhm,” she agreed absentmindedly, still paying attention to you.
“Classes weren’t really all that bad today,” Mindy commented, prompting yet another ‘mhm’ from Tara. You were preparing a coffee with utmost care, and there was definitely a reason why Tara kept sitting at this exact spot. It was easy to sneak glances your way from her seat.
“The Babadook sucks,” Mindy said and she once more agreed before Mindy snapped her fingers right in front of Tara’s face.
“Earth to Lover Girl, can you at least pretend we’re not here so you can make googly eyes at your crush?” Mindy was stuck between being amused and annoyed.
“Fine, fine, what did you just say?” she asked but Mindy just stuck her tongue out and Tara rolled her eyes. From the corner of her eyes she caught you smiling at her as you dried a glass you just washed.
About an hour later Tara approached you with the coffee cups. “Thank you, they were amazing, as always,” she told you as you reached over the counter to take them.
“Could I interest you in trying some other coffees? Only drinking cappuccino will make it taste bland over time,” you suggested and gestured at the chair near the bar. “Might be a good way to get to know each other, assuming I’m not misinterpreting things, of course,” you looked confident, but there was a small hint of shyness in your gaze. As if you’ve been trying to ask her this for some time now.
“Sure, I’ll leave my coffee order in your hands,” she accepted a bit too eagerly and you grinned together.
~X~
The next time she came to the coffee shop she sat down close to you, alone and eager to see what you had in mind for the first coffee testing, as Tara dubbed it.
“I’m all yours, barista,” she winked at you, not entirely catching on to what she just said.
You took it like a champ though, not even flinching at the potential double meaning as you prepared her coffee and Tara would love to say she could follow what you were doing but there was a reason she was desperately reliant on a coffee machine or shops like this one. Eventually you placed a small glass in front of her.
“Ristretto, comes from Italy, basically a stronger espresso. Same amount of coffee, in half the water,” it was early in the morning and she did have a long day ahead of her.
She nodded and brought the glass closer to her.
“So, how come you are a barista? I mean, besides your parents owning the place?” Tara asked, not yet ready to drink the coffee and be on her way.
You leaned over the counter. “Coffee is a bit of a passion for me, I love making it, and trying different variations,” you replied and she could see the honesty in your eyes.
Being passionate about coffee wasn’t what she expected but somehow, given how good you were at making it, she immediately believed it.
“I’m happy you can pursue your passion,” when was the last time she could pursue her own passions without looking behind her shoulder?
“It helps that I get to meet beautiful girls, like your friend last week,” you smirked, teasing her slightly.
She tried the coffee, and it was definitely strong, but there was some sweetness to it. “And what am I?” she chose to be bold, leaning slightly closer to you as she asked that.
You moved your hand until it was right next to her and offered it to her, and she accepted, putting her hand on top of your own. “You, Tara, are more than just beautiful.”
“Real smooth, Y/N,” she snickered but she would be lying if she said the compliment didn’t feel nice.
~X~
“Something lighter this time,” the moment Tara stepped into the coffee shop you placed a coffee cup at her newfound place at the bar.
“Am I that predictable?” Tara asked, actually slightly concerned about it. If you could time making the coffee for her after only knowing her for a short period of time. Could someone intending to hurt her learn her patterns this easily?
“Every single morning at 9:27 you walk through those doors,” you shrugged and she figured she unconsciously did start doing that.
She still rolled her eyes and sat down at her seat. She looked at her coffee.
“Café au lait, French this time. Coffee with warm milk,” you explained, correcting her assumption that it was just regular white coffee.
“You’re the expert,” she smiled and tried the coffee, and the only thing that crossed her mind was that she should have gotten you to experiment with her coffee taste sooner. “I swear I only tolerated coffee, but you’ll make me love it,” she sighed, almost dreamily at the light taste.
“That’s the idea,” you grinned but unlike last time when you could stay and chat with her, this time the coffee shop was busy, and you had to do your job. You still had the time to ask her about how her day went yesterday and how she did on the exam she had.
And it made her feel like her heart would lean out of her chest.
~X~
It took some time before you offered her a new coffee. You liked surprising her with new coffees randomly and over that period of time you met both Chad and Sam, both meetings went surprisingly well.
Tara had a gut feeling she would be trying a new coffee today as she walked into the coffee shop and saw you heating up water in some thin and tall pot. “Hey, Tara,” you said without turning to look at her and she leaned over the bar to watch you work. “Come over to this side,” you invited her and she happily rushed to your side. She just now realized this was the closest the two of you were, even closer than when you would bring her coffee to the table. So, instead of turning into a tomato, she focused on what you were doing. You added ground coffee to the boiling water and soon enough it began frothing.
“Watch out!” she exclaimed out of habit, but you just grinned and lifted it up, before lowering it back onto the stove and Tara watched as the coffee began frothing again.
“Trust the process,” you told her and lifted it again just as it reached the top of the pot and then did it again one last time before pouring it into two porcelain coffee cups. “Try it without sugar at first, then add it if you need to,” you said and placed cups in front of the chair next to your own. You patted the spot next to you and Tara hopped onto the chair, happy to be sharing coffee with you for the very first time.
“Which one is this?” she asked, the strong scent immediately woke her up, and while it was bitter it had a taste just as strong as the scent. It was bitter enough that she needed to add a bit of sugar to it.
“Turkish, you saw the process, and that,” you pointed at the thin and tall pot. “Is most often called a cezve,” you explained and took a sip of the coffee, clearly enjoying yourself.
Tara smiled, leaning a bit closer to you, enjoying the warmth of the coffee and your presence.
~X~
“Caffè mocha!” she knew this one, she never really went out of her way to try it, but she knew it, and she was proud to show you she could name what you just made for her.
“Mhm,” you were drinking with her behind the counter again, as it was a habit you seemed to develop ever since you made that Turkish coffee for her. “Figured you deserved something sweet for getting an A on that exam,” you nudged her lightly and she grinned, all happy and proud.
“You know it,” she looked at you and felt ready to finally take that next step. In fact, she’s been trying to get herself hyped up to say it since your meeting with Sam went well. “Say, Y/N,” she began and cleared her throat.
“Yeah?” your full attention was on her, made possible by lack of customers at the moment and Tara thanked whatever higher being arranged for that to happen.
“I want to make coffee for you,” she said and you raised an eyebrow, clearly surprised by her offer. “Come and hang out at my place? I mean, Sam will be there because she is really protective, but uh, yeah, come to my place,” she stopped herself before she could start rambling.
“I’d love that,” you said and that was when her luck ran out, as a customer came into the coffee shop and you had to go and get his order. “I’d absolutely love that,” you leaned over and kissed her on the cheek and Tara pumped her fist and cheered quietly, much to your amusement.
~X~
You couldn't remember the last time you were this nervous; after all a beautiful girl just invited you to her apartment. Granted with her older sister present as well, but she did invite you. You looked up at the building in front of you, it was almost daunting with how many floor it had and as far as you knew there were no elevators and Tara lived on the top floor. You still had no idea why, or why Sam was as protective of Tara as she was.
You understood older sibling protectiveness, but Sam took it to the next level.
“I can do this,” you hyped yourself up and typed in the code Tara gave you. The heavy metal doors opened, and you stepped in, beginning the long journey up the stairs. Well, at least this was a good test to see if you were still in shape. And it turned out you were still in good shape! Which was great because otherwise you would have had a lot of troubles keeping your heart rate normal. Your heart was already beating faster than it should just because you were about to meet up with Tara but that was beside the point, at least you didn’t have to worry about whether you were or weren’t in shape. You reached the door of her apartment and took another deep breath. “I can do this,” you whispered to yourself, and you checked the flower bouquet and the box of chocolates you brought. Frankly speaking, you may have dressed to impress a bit too much, but knowing Tara she would find it endearing.
At least you hoped she would.
You were just about to knock when the door suddenly opened and you were met with the girl you had a crush on for the past several weeks. Could the ground beneath your feet just open and swallow you whole? This was too embarrassing! “Oh, hi!” you stammered embarrassed as she caught you in front of her own doors like a dumbass who couldn't even get the courage to knock on the doors of the girl that invited them in herself.
“Hi,” she blushed and looked down and you found yourself thinking she looked so adorable like this. And then you both just laughed because you were both ridiculously shy about this. All that confidence you had back at the coffee shop was seemingly gone, as it was blown away by the wind blowing around the building. “Oh, shit, sorry, come on in!” Tara seemed to realize she was blocking your entrance and stepped aside letting you come in and join her inside.
“Right, thank you for having me,” you cleared your throat and gave her the flowers and the box of chocolates. “Uh, this is for you. I didn't know what you liked so I just went with the cliche option,” you nervously rubbed the back of your neck as heat rushed to your cheeks. Tara smiled and took it from you, and her fingers brushed against your own.
“Thanks, I love it,” and so you went inside followed her to the living room where Sam was already waiting.
“Hello, Sam,” you nodded, greeting her and she nodded back.
“Come on sit down, I won't bite,” Sam smiled kindly at you and gestured towards the sofa “Tara's been really nervous about impressing you, just so you know,” her words cause Tara to adorably blush once more.
“Sam please,” the younger Carpenter sister groaned and seemed to make herself even smaller than she was and then she just pointed toward what you assumed was the kitchen. “I’m just going to go and make coffee.”
Unlike you, she had a way to flee.
But that meant you would be alone with Sam.
“Wait! Do you need help? You know, since I am a professional and all that,” you were grasping at straws, pleading for mercy, because anything would be better than being along with Sam. Even all these weeks after you met her she still made you nervous. Tara seemed to relax at seeing you were just as nervous as she was, if not more and she laughed patting you on the back.
“I think I can handle myself,” well, as long as she felt better you figured you could take some teasing. Resigning to your fate you just sighed and sat down as Tara left you and Sam alone.
“So, what are your intentions with my sister?” Sam asked without a hint of joking, she was completely serious, and you choked on air, only to then hear her chuckling. “Relax I'm just messing with you. Let's just wait for Tara to come back with coffee.”
Well, that was a relief. So, you sat there in silence, and you had a feeling this was only awkward for you, from the looks of it for Sam it was more amusing slash comfortable. Finally, after way too much time, Tara came back with three coffee mugs and she sat down next to you. You recognized the smell the moment she stepped into the living room and you couldn’t describe how happy you were.
“I've been practicing,” she confessed and it showed because the coffee smelled wonderful.
“Cortado,” you would recognize the scent anywhere and she, from the looks of it, did it perfectly.
Tara smacked her forehead in frustration “Damn, I was sure you wouldn't guess it. Guess that’s a pro for you,” she, clearly still annoyed, handed a twenty dollar bill to a rather satisfied Sam.
“It's one of my favorites actually,” you confessed and her eyes widened at that.
“So how come you never made it for me?” she sounded offended as if something special between you just became a tiny bit less special.
“It's not on the menu, and well I like to keep this one for special people. And in private, can't have customers smelling this and asking about it,” you shrugged and took the sip of the coffee. You were right, it really was perfect, even more so since Tara was the one who made it for you.
“Fine, you goofball, but you're making it for me next time. At your own apartment,” you could work with that even if Sam nearly choked when Tara said that.
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rekino2114 · 3 days ago
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Messing with the chainsaw man girls hair
This was requested by @shikitohnoskk
The request:Hey, is it okay for me to request it again? I've noticed that most of the Chainsaw Man girls (Makima, Asa, Kobeni, and Quanxi) wear a ponytail.
Headcanon: Have S/O see their hair down and compliment it, and perhaps personally tie their hair into a ponytail.
Note: for the other girls who haven't ponytailed or short hair like Power, Himeno, and Fami (does Yoru count since she is in Asa's body)?. What are your ideas on them?
A/n:I couldn't come up with a good title that fit all the girls' scenarios, so you get that. Also, sorry if I posted this later than usual again. School sucks
Makima
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Living with makima, you've gotten used to the morning routine you have. She always wakes up before you and prepares everything you need. She wakes you up with a kiss, and you do your morning routines together, helping each other get dressed, washing your faces, and putting each other's ties on. It's a really sweet and domestic moment that you love.
Doing this so many times, you started to notice something, whenever you woke up makima already had her hair done, even if she was still in the lingerie she wore to bed.
You weren't surprised. Her ponytail looked like it took a lot of time to get done, and she probably didn't want to "bother" you, but you still wanted to see her with her hair down, so one day you woke up by yourself, without needing her to kiss you.
You yawned and stretched, then made your way to the bathroom where you saw just what you wanted to see, your girlfriend in front of the mirror messing with her hair.
She noticed you behind her in the mirror but did nothing and waited for you to come near her, you did and hugged her tightly, still a bit groggy
"Good morning darling, why did you wake up early today?"
"Wanted to see you"
Makima giggled at your sleepy tone but turned around and hugged you back kissing you in the process
"Your hair looks beautiful like this"
"Does it? I think it looks unkempt"
"It's still beautiful"
"Thank you love"
She kissed you once more and pulled away from the hug, turned around again towards the mirror, and grabbed her hair tie
"Do you want me to help you?"
"Hm?"
"I can help you tie your hair if you want"
"That would be wonderful, my love, are you sure?"
"Of course, I'd love that"
Makima smiled brightly at you and handed you the hair tie. You took it and gently grabbed her hair and started to tie it up, trying to imitate the form you always saw it in.
"You're amazing, my darling, i don't know what I'd do without you"
"What do you mean? You do this alone every morning"
"No, I meant in general. You give me a reason to wake up and get ready every day"
"That's so sweet to hear, but you know you'll always look beautiful to me, no matter what"
"Thank you sweetie, but I still want to do this, you really didn't have to"
"But I wanted to"
"And that's what makes you so wonderful"
You finished tying her hair, and she looked at it. She thought it was even more beautiful than when she made it
"It looks amazing thank you so much"
"Don't worry about it, it's the least I could do"
She turned around one last time to kiss you, even more passionately this time. When she pulled back, her beautiful golden eyes looked back at you with so much love
"I don't think words can describe how much I love you"
"The same goes for me makima"
Power
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"Get your hands off of me, filthy human"
"......power please calm down"
You and the rest of division 4 were supposed to attend a meeting with makima and some important members of the government, so your boss advised you to dress nicely, this was no problem for you and your other friends, but it kinda was for your girlfriend power.
She only accepted to take a bath when you joined her and even then didn't wash very well and she struggled a lot while you were helping her put her suit on.
"Ugh! This is so uncomfortable"
"I know, but you have to wear it"
"Said who?"
"Makima"
"...........ok"
She sat in front of you again as you put her tie on
"OK I'm done"
"Finally!"
She started to get up but you stopped her
"Wait, we're not finished, you have to tie your hair"
"What? Why?"
"I dunno, I guess it makes you look more....... civilzed"
"Are you saying I'm not civilized normally?"
"Listen, we need to make a good impression, or makima is gonna dock our pay. Just put this on, please,"
The blood fiend pouted and turned around dramatically
"Never! I refuse!"
"I'll give you cuddles when we get back"
"..........."
"With meowy"
Power turned towards you again, still pouting but with a blush on her face"
"Fine, you win"
"Thanks"
She grabbed the hair tie you were holding in your hands and looked at it for a while before trying to tie her hair.....unsuccessfully
"Do you.....need help?"
"O-of course not! How dare you say that!"
She proceeded to continue failing to tie her hair
".........can you help me?"
You giggled but quickly got up and went behind her, taking the hair tie and starting to tie her hair
"Have you ever tied your hair before?"
"Y-yeah but it's really hard doing it alone"
"Don't worry, I get it. You can ask me for help when you're struggling"
"R-really?"
"Of course, I'd love to"
"......thanks"
"It's no problem"
As you finished tying her hair you looked at it and smiled
"You look beautiful like this"
Hearing this power smugly grinned and turned around to look at you
"Of course, did you have any doubts the great power would look beautiful in any hair style?"
You laughed again and kissed her cheek, causing it to glow red
"No, I definitely didn't, now let's go, denji and aki are waiting for us"
Himeno
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After waking up and doing everything you needed to, you were waiting for himeno to wake up as she usually slept late. You heard a big yawn coming from your bedroom and knew that she woke up so you waited patiently for her to come out of the bathr-
"AAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!"
You immediately sprinted towards the bathroom
"Himeno, what's wrong?"
"O-oh hiiiii y/n, n-nothings's wrong I just-"
"Why are you covering the left side of your head?"
"......whaaaaaat? No I'm not"
"Seriously hime, what's wrong you know you can tell me"
Himeno sighed and took her hand off of her hair
"OK, just don't laugh"
She turned around and you started staring at her hair, at first you saw nothing wrong but then
"Wait, is the left side of your hair completely cut off?"
"Yeah"
"How did that even happen?"
"I-i dunno I was drunk last night and-"
"You had scissors while you were drunk? You could have hurt yourself"
"I know.....sorry"
"It's fine, at least you're ok"
"Yeah, my hair isn't though, you think I'd look good with a hat?"
You both laughed softly at that, you put a hand on her head and started stroking her hair
"While I think you'd look good with anything, I don't think you need to put one on"
"Hm? Why? You got a solution?"
"Maybe, what if you cut the other side too so it's even, you have shot hair anyway so it'll grow back fast"
"I guess that could work, but to be honest, I don't really trust myself with scissors anymore, even sober me"
"I can help you"
"Really?"
"Yeah of course"
"Awww, thanks so much baby, you're the best"
"It's nothing just go sit somewhere, I'll grab the scissors"
Your girlfriend gave you a thumbs up and grabbed a chair to sit in while you took the scissors. You then stood behind her and started cutting her hair carefully
"This is just like being at an hairdresser"
"Don't exaggerate, I'm not a professional so it may come out ugly"
"Please, if you do it, then it possibly can't be ugly"
"You're giving me too much credit"
"Nah, it's you who's giving yourself too little credit"
"Well thanks"
"No problem"
After you finished cutting her hair, you told her so, and she went to the mirror to see how it looked. After she stared at herself for a few seconds, she smiled widely and went to hug and kiss you
"You're amazing y/n, this looks great"
"Oh please it's not-"
"Hey! Stop that. You're amazing, ok? That wasn't a question it was a statement, so don't try to argue with it"
"Hehe, alright thanks, I'll accept it"
Himeno smiled again and kissed you passionately
"Great, because I'll say it as many times as I need to"
Kobeni higashiyama
(The person who requested this actually sent me this picture saying it inspired them to request, I really appreciate that so thanks)
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You put the keys in the door of your shared apartment and turned them, as soon as you opened it, kobeni weakly walked through the living room and let herself fall on the sofa heavily sighing in the pillow
"The mission was hard wasn't it?"
She got up and turned towards you, her expression softening a bit but still clearly irritated
"Yes, well, the mission itself was supposed to be easy, but power was insufferable. She kept being so loud and annoying and reckless-"
You quickly pulled her into a hug, which caused her to relax and nuzzle in your chest
"I know I know, don't worry I'll ask makima to pair us up together next time ok?"
"T-thanks"
"How about we just relax now, let's cuddle and watch a movie"
"Yes please, I'd like that"
You two smiled at each other, and you went to the kitchen to get the snacks ready while kobeni changed into something more comfortable. You came back after a while and brought the blankets with you, you saw kobeni with her pjs on
"You look good"
"E-Eh?"
"I'm just saying, you look cute when you're comfy, I like seeing you relaxed"
She blushed and looked away for a moment before smiling again at you again
"Thank you"
You smiled even brighter as you sat near her and you started watching the movie
"Why do you still have your hair tied?"
"Hm?"
"I thought you'd let your hair down, to help you get more comfy"
"I-i guess"
She raised her hands to her hair, but you grabbed them and held them in yours, kobeni started blushing but looked at you with confusion
"No, let me do it, I want to"
"W-what?"
Before she could protest, you started untying her hair and grabbed her hairpins, putting them on the table along with the hair tie
"There you go beni"
"O-oh thanks"
"It's nothing, I just want nothing more than to help you relax in any way possible"
"You're really the best I love you"
Your girlfriend started to relax more and laid her head on your shoulder. You smiled at this and started playing with her now free hair
"Your hair looks beautiful"
"U-uh? Oh, thanks, really"
"Every part of you is beautiful to me, especially right now. You're always so stressed and tired, I love seeing you like this"
Kobeni turned to look at you a bit surprised but quickly smiled as she felt her cheeks getting even hotter
"Thank you really, thank you so much, I cannot describe how much I love you"
"Me too beni"
Quanxi
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"I'm taking a shower. Do you wanna join me?"
You looked up from your phone to see quanxi starting to take her blood-soaked suit off
"Oh no, thanks, I'm not really in the mood right now"
Quanxi nodded silently and continued to take her clothes off in front of you, something you had gotten used to as she had little to no trouble walking around the house in very little clothes
"Then can you wash the suit? The blood got in pretty deep"
"Yeah sure"
You got up and grabbed the clothes she threw on the ground, you started walking but were stopped by quanxi, putting a hand on your shoulder
"Wait"
She untied her hair and shook her head, making her white hair flow and fall behind her head, despite her being in nothing but her eyepatch, her hair was still the thing that caught your attention the most.
"You don't need to wash this, just give it to me when I'm done"
"OK"
She smiled at you and gave you a kiss on the forehead
"Thank you, sweetheart"
After you put her suit in the washing machine, you resumed doing what you were doing before while you listened to the water fall in the bathroom until the sound stopped, and you heard the door open.
"Love, can you give me the hair tie back?"
You looked up again and saw your beautiful girlfriend in a tank top and shorts and still with her hair down
"Oh yeah, here you go"
You got up again and handed her the hair. she rewarded you with another forehead kiss
"You look beautiful"
"Uhm?"
"Your hair, it genuinely looks beautiful like this"
"Oh, thanks, I guess I don't let them down often, so I'm glad you like it"
"Do you mind if I tie your hair?"
"Sure"
Her answering with such little hesitation confused you a bit, as did her handing you the hair tie and turning around as well as bending over a bit.
But you quickly did what you wanted to and tied her snow like hair, admiring how genuinely beautiful it looked
"You really like my hair, don't you?"
"Yeah, I love it, like every part of your body"
"I'm glad"
When you finished your job, quanxi turned around and suddenly kissed you passionately and wrapped one of her arms around you, sliding the other one under your shirt, feeling your stomach
"I love you so much, my sweet"
"I love you too"
Asa mitaka/yoru
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Having two girlfriends in one body sometimes made it difficult to distinguish who was in control of the body in one specific moment, but you found a method to do it. If you can't see the face directly, because the scars and eyes would give it away pretty fast, you look at the hair, if it's a ponytail then it's probably asa and if they're down then it's probably yoru.
For some reason, one of the first things yoru does when she takes over is untying her hair and throwing the hair tie somewhere in the room making it hard for asa to find it later, one of this occasions resulted in you currently tying asa's hair
"Thanks for helping me"
"It's nothing, don't worry, you should probably get more hair ties though, how did this one end under your bed anyway?"
"I don't know ask yoru"
The girl said in a passive-aggressive tone, hoping to get the attention of the devil in her head who just ignored her
"I guess I could try to ask her to be more careful about it"
"Please do"
"Hehe, ok, I'm finished by the way"
"Thanks"
"You're welcome"
Asa stood up and turned towards you but was surprised to see your lips approaching hers, and before she could react, you kissed her. After a bit of confusion, she reciprocated your kiss that lasted for a bit before you pulled back
"So do you wanna eat something? I have some chips if you want"
"Yeah thanks"
You gave her a thumbs up and went to the cabinet, grabbed the bag of chips and two bowls and put it on the table, you looked back at asa only to see her......with her hair tied down
"......yoru? What are you doing here?"
"I took over"
"Yeah why?"
"I wanted to see you"
"*sighs* OK....but take the hair tie back"
"Eh? Why?"
"Cause then asa will have to spend hours searching for it"
"Fine, here"
She handed you the hair tie she surprisingly still had
"You didn't throw it away?"
"No....I heard what you said"
"Oh thanks"
Surprised by her thoughtfulness, you kissed her like you did with asa, which caused her to blush slightly but kiss back quickly, more aggressively than her host. She let the kiss go on for a few more seconds before she pulled back
"I'm gonna tie your hair now"
"Why? I like them better like this"
"Cause asa just tied them, I don't want her to have to do it again"
"It's always asa this and asa that, what about me? I like my hair like this"
"It's not your hair in the first place"
"..........ok that's fair"
"I'm glad you understand"
The war devil reluctantly turned around and let you tie her (asa's) hair again. After you finished, she turned back only to not have the scars and ringed eyes anymore
"Oh hey, welcome back asa"
"Thanks"
"I'm surprised yoru let you take over"
"She didn't, I think she's still yelling at me in my head"
"Oh, you're fighting over me?"
"We kinda have to when we share a body"
"Well, I'm flattered"
"Thanks for tying my hair again by the way, I know it can be annoying"
"Oh no not at all, I love it"
"I'm glad, I really love everything you do for me well for us"
Fami
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A/n:So, since we're talking about hair and fami, I wanted to bring up something I've been thinking about for a while. What color is fami's hair actually? I always thought it was pink (maybe because i associate her with kirby) but in the volume cover she's in, you can't really see the color because the lighting is weird (or they're more purply) and in the fanart I've seen she's with either pink, purple or white/cream colored hair similar to quanxi. I guess we won't know for a while, but I'll still keep writing her as if she has pink hair. Also, sorry if this is shorter than the other ones, I didn't have that many ideas
"Fami can you......take off your hat for a while?"
You had been staring at the famine's devil hair for a while, something that she noticed but didn't seem to mind. You were confused by it and wanted to confirm something, which prompted you to ask the question
"Why?"
"I just wanna see your hair"
Fami shrugged and did as you told her, revealing her pink hair full of crumbs and stains
"What........happened?"
"What do you mean?"
"Your hair is dirty, like really dirty"
"Oh yeah, some food fell on me"
".......how?"
"I was trying to get it in the cabinet and it fell on me"
"......*sighs* I'll go get a hairbrush"
You went to the bathroom and took a hairbrush out of a cabinet, going back to the living room and standing behind fami while she was still eating, starting to brush her hair carefully
"What are you doing?"
"Trying to clean your hair"
"Oh........thanks"
"No problem, just tell me earlier next time"
"Ok, I just didn't want to bother you"
"You could never bother me. In fact, I love your hair, and I love brushing them"
"......thanks again"
"It's really nothing but geez, a lot fell on you, I think we'll have to wash it"
"I guess I don't mind if you join me"
"*sighs* sure if you want
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ivysprophecy · 2 days ago
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slim pickins
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warnings; bad date? mentions of sex, cursing underage drinking and yes i meant for it to be written poorly i was trying to keep the humor of the album in the writing
no pressure tags; @murdockcastleslut @kimoralov3 @arkofblake
word count; 1911
summary; youre tired of not finding a decent guy who will treat you right and lay you right. at least not one you've known since you were kids. however you just cant help yourself. besides its slim pickins out here you take what you can get.
divider by @bernardsbendystraws
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i wanna make one thing clear, when i say there are no good guys left i do not wanna hear about you and your boyfriend of three years that can cook and loves your mom.
thats exactly what im talking about maddie!!! i dont give two fucks that he took you to barnes and noble and bought you every book you wanted.
they are all taken. its plain and simple.
which is why even with a full roster, im stuck taking fucking zander, yes with a z, to my friends' kegger.
i mean yea hes cute. hes tall, built but not that gross kind of muscly. but if were being real i shouldve known better when he was joking about being a male stripper when hes a ginger.
and i can tell kie is judging me, rightfully so. her side eye is lethal. when i introduced him to everyone she asked him about his greta van fleet tee and he said he didn't even know it was a band.
needless to say pope had to drag her away.
after that incident i decided it was best if we tried to talk away from the rest of the group. boy was i wrong.
"so what do you like to drink? ill go grab us something," i offer trying to start the conversation, also avoiding the usual problem with taking a drink from men.
"im good with whatever"
i like to think im not a violent person, but im about to be.
"does a beer sound okay?" i ask him grabbing a twisted tea for me from the cooler.
"sure thing." god why is he acting like such a bitch? i should ask him if he's on his period.
i hand him the can, our fingers brush and its my final clue for the night that i am definitely not going home with him. no spark at all. hes done just about everything else to piss me off.
he did the thing where he licks his lips exaggeratingly looking me up and down, making a point to make sure i saw.
he walks so slow for being 6'3.
and finally he tried to mansplain my career to me. i'd had just enough when he opens his mouth again
"ew, you like twisted tea? who likes sweet tea?" his face contorted in disgust, it was about to contort from my fist breaking his goddamn nose if he keeps talking to me like this.
"we literally live in the south dude." my face could not make it any clearer i am so done with this guy.
"still, sweet tea is disgusting. im not kissing anyone that drinks that nasty shit."
"who said i wanted to kiss your nasty fucking mou-" i was interrupted by the sound of a very familiar giggle behind me as his arm wrapped around my shoulder, the smell of his deodorant and sea salt that cover his skin start to put you at ease.
jj was always there when you needed him, sometimes even when you didnt but right now you couldn't be more grateful. "im glad you found those mama i got em just for you. remembered theyre your favorite. right?"
and you wanna know the best part? zander is shaking already pissed off that jj is at my side. territorial i guess.
"you mind?" he asks him nodding his head at me like im not even there.
jj cant help but laugh at him "yea bud i do mind. she's hanging out with me tonight. have fun with your ipa dick." and with that he steers us off to where the rest of the pogues are.
but not before i can look over my shoulder and give the ginger an innocent smile and a shrug as if i had no control over the situation, when really id pick jj over anyone else.
"you owe me a big fat kiss mama," jj whispers in my ear walking us over to where our friends are standing, drinks in their hands laughing and chatting up a storm.
"in your dreams honey."
"every night all night," he quips back before i shove him off me.
now before you give me shit, jj and i have had our fair share of fun, but unfortunately im starting to look for something more serious.
watching john b and sarah be disgusting together is getting to my head. popes got something going on with cleo and im starting to recognize the pattern. and before i know it everyone will be in love if i don't start making an effort in that department.
random casual hook ups aren't doing it anymore, especially considering they aren't even that good.
unless theyre with jj.
but hes not an option, theres too much drama. too much history. too much too much too much. im not what he needs and i know for a fact he doesn't want me in that sense.
is that a bit dramatic? probably.
i mean hes a great lay, he's hilarious, he's got that blue collar kind of muscle, and he genuinely cares about me.
so of course im not going to date him, why would i?
what do you mean make good decisions? id rather do things in the most difficult way possible!
"y/n youve gotta stop giving those guys a chance, im starting to feel bad for you."
"you try finding a decent guy in a ten mile radius." i glare at him, obviously not wanting to joke about this right now.
he sticks his hand out in front of me, "fine i will. let me see your phone."
curious to see what he will do i hand it too him unlocked, he swipes and taps for a few moments, smiling down at the phone before handing it back to you.
when you look back down at the screen all you see is your instagram open with his stupid fucking smiley face on the screen.
he took a picture of himself and posted to my story. written on the screen in bubble letters in my favorite colored heart 'my favorite guy <3'
"i think he's your best bet." that same smile facing back at me now, cockier than ever. so smug i wanna kiss it off his face
i cant help but roll my eyes. "jj im serious! at this rate im going to die alone. every decent guy is taken or unavailable. all i want is someone funny, kind, and attractive is that too much to ask for?"
"im right in front of you mama you dont gotta look far."
"jj we both know we're not the serious kind of relationship im talking about."
"you can think what you want too but ill be here waiting for that kiss you owe me."
"i think all that tequila youve been sipping has gone to your head maybank."
he stands in front of me, taking his signature red cap off his head and putting it on mine smiling down at me, "what do they say in those books you read? you wear the hat you ride the cowboy?"
"this no ten gallon hat and you are no cowboy."
we laugh at each other, its always been easier to do that then actually talk about our feelings. so i put his hat back on his head, backwards the way he i likes it.
"cmon y/n/n, have a few more drinks, relax and hang out and ill make you feel all better later yea? its what im best at, you know."
"its gonna take more than a few more teas to convince me jj"
"what about that thing you like that i do with my tongue, huh mama? doesnt that sound pretty good right now? i think it does."
"i give you one fucking compliment and it goes straight to your head."
"technically its about my head so that makes perfect sense," he hands me another can with that stupid signature smirk of his and his stupid sexy hat backwards. i hate to admit it's working on me.
just like it does every other time.
i squint my eyes at him taking the can, rolling the idea around in my head. "fuck it. its not like anyone else is offering," i take a big sip of my drink.
jj pumps his fist in the air like a victorious idiot giving a few woots and hollars before picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder despite my wishes.
"jb!!" he shouts turning around to face him, "we're headed out!"
john b looks at the two of us shaking his head at how im kicking my feet to wiggle out of jjs oddly strong grip. "make sure you change the sheets when youre done!"
oh my god he did not just say that. "fuck both of you!"
jj just laughs carrying you back to the chateau like a kid who's excited to use a brand new birthday present.
"what happened to letting me have a few more drinks before we left??"
"youre just too irresistable mama, gotta have you now,' he gives my ass a light slap for good measure causing me to roll my eyes for the 600th time tonight.
"are you gonna put me down now?"
he pretends to look like hes thinking about it, "i guess. only so i can watch you walk away," he does as he says helping me get my feet on the ground.
"youre a pervert."
"no im flirtatious, and you love it, you know it makes you blush i see it. now go on and give me a lil walk yea?"
oh im gonna kill him...
oh wait! im gonna kill him!
"okay... fine. but no touching until we get home," i smile walking away exactly like he asked, but i know behind me he is a puddle of mud. standing still, about to start begging me to let him.
he finally catches up after a few seconds "mama please- cmon thats not fair. you look too good in those shorts you know i cant wait that long. just wanna feel you."
i cant help but giggle at his words, its honestly adorable how mopey he gets. like i just kicked his puppy or something.
"hands of jj i mean it... not until that door shuts behind us."
it didn't really matter that i can see the chateau or that ill be there in literally a minute.
its actually painful for jj to not be able to touch me as he pleases.
i turn around to face him with a cheeky smile. "you want me maybank?"
and of course he nods so hard it looks like his head is going to fall right off.
"come and get me," running towards the house, i can see the moment when his reflexes kick in, his boots thudding against the ground as he gains on me.
just before i can make it to the poarch jj wraps his arms around me, lifting me a few inches off the ground and spinning me around in a fit of laughter.
"okay! okay okay okay you win- you got me."
"oh ive got you mama, and im havin you for the rest of the fucking night," he presses a kiss to my neck hauling me inside, the screen door slamming shut after us.
am i gonna regret this tomorrow? most likely.
but what can i say? its slim pickins in this part of town.
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quantomeno · 2 days ago
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I've been following this matter for a while now (a quick search of newspaper articles showed it's been floated since mid last year, and I remember having to use my passport to verify my age on my gmail (it's not the account I use for tumblr, the account has my name in the address, so it's already pretty clearly me, so I was begrudgingly okay with it but am still annoyed my other account now can't watch age restricted youtube videos unless I tie it to my identity)). It's a vexed issue.
The first thing I'd like to point out is that the person quoted in the above post ("I am 100 percent etc") is Keith Pitt, a member of the Nationals who was resources and water minister under Morrison. I feel this is important because while he'd definitely be someone who'd vote in support of the measure, he's not a member of the party in power, let alone a Cabinet minister. His opinion is not necessarily that of the Prime Minister ― Anthony Albanese ― and it makes it seem like what he's talking about is what the government is planning to do.
What is the PM actually saying they'll do?
To be honest, I don't think the government knows yet. From what I can gather, there has been no suggestion by the PM that they would force people's accounts to have their real names. The Age a few days ago reported this:
"Australia’s eSafety commissioner has instead recommended a “double-blind tokenised approach”, whereby information would be provided to a verifying third party that would certify the user’s age to social media platforms without revealing details about the child. The details of the plan are being worked through by a trial of age-verification technologies."
(the "instead" is in reference to the current practice of social media platforms asking people if they over 13, which I'm sure most people realise would stop pretty much no child)
In that same article though they also said "the government has not unveiled key details, including the technology that would be used to keep children out". So I think there is quite a bit of time before anything is going to be written into law.
While I don't think your name will be "slapped onto your tumblr account" (if that does end up being what they do I would actually delete my tumblr, I really do not want that), there is still the question of privacy being invaded in that the government would (I think? I'm not a tech expert in the slightest) be able to connect you to your account.
Keep in mind that we are close to an election (there's been whispers it could be May next year), and this is an issue that (as the Keith Pitt quote shows) both of the major parties seem to mostly agree on. A cynical view is that the PM is talking tough to neutralise the issue so it can't be attacked by the opposition for not protecting children. The fact that both are talking about it does however suggest it will eventually come to pass (unlike other complicated legislation that was touted as 'essential' but then got shelved after being too hard to get through (naming no names i.e. Scomo's religious discrimination bill).
The other point to discuss is that while I really do enjoy people not knowing who I am on tumblr (and people in my life not being able to know I'm on tumblr), I also don't really think kids should be on social media (or at least not in the way they currently are). I avoided social media (I only had a facebook account I barely touched) until I was an adult (and even then I waited a while) and I'm quite glad, mostly because I think I'm a lot more mature. On the other hand, while I didn't interact with people, I grew up in a time when you could browse most platforms without an account, so it's not like I wasn't exposed to things on the internet. And then there's a bit of a moral panic about the internet, which can be a bit overblown at times. But then I'll hear a 14 year old I know mentioning stuff that makes me think he's kind of obsessed with growing muscles and I wonder if he's seeing these sorts of things online. I mean, there's a lot of garbage on the internet. But there's a lot of really useful things too... it's complicated and I'm not settled on an opinion yet.
Kids really do need to learn better internet practices and behaviours, but there are also kids in primary school with social media accounts. I mean, what does a 12 year old do in their life that they need the world to see? (don't answer that it's rhetorical, I'm sure there are plenty of 12 year olds doing interesting things worth showing off, but I mean, beyond messaging friends, 12 year olds don't really need to be communicating with strangers on the internet). Note too it's specifically social media (the definition is given by OP but it's anything where the main purpose is share content or talk to a wide audience of people. Things like games with chat stuff are also being looked into.
I'm also a bit of a luddite and think kids should read more. I'm not actually trying to convince people the ban is good, I'm just thinking aloud here. The whole thing feels rather heavy-handed, brute-force, and there's every chance kids will still find ways around it. I don't think this is the ideal solution, but I do feel there is a problem to be addressed.
But yeah, do tell your local member that you are concerned and want to make sure your privacy is kept safe. Just be aware of who your member is and their/their party's stance (all Labor MPs vote with the party, Liberals and Nationals can vote against their own party, so they may not all be in agreement). The Greens are opposed to it. I am not sure what the teal independents think of it.
You may also want to contact some senators from your state, not just your MP.
As for the contents of the letter, maybe something like:
Dear Mr/Ms/Dr (whatever title they use) surname MP,
I am a resident of your electorate (electorate name). (Maybe say a little bit about yourself, just what you think is relevant to the letter or your arguments).
I am writing to you to discuss the proposed social media ban for children. I am concerned (explain what/why you are concerned).
(Try to keep it brief, but also try to be personal)
State what you want your MP to do. Ask them to reply to your letter.
Sincerely,
your name.
You may want to mail the letter rather than just emailing. This page from Oxfam I just looked up five minutes ago has some nice tips.
Hey Aussies, do you want your real name and ID slapped on your tumblr account? If the answer is fuck no, our gov’s got a upcoming legislation for banning 16 year olds and under from social media even WITH parental consent. And by “Social Media”…
The code defines social media as electronic services that meet the following conditions:
The sole or primary purpose of the service is to enable online social interaction between two or more end users
The service allows end users to link to, or interact with, some or all other end users
The service allows end users to post material on the service
Such other conditions (if any) as are set out in the legislative rules.
So. You know. Just the entire fucking internet. They even named youtube as banned, god forbid kids out in the bush get access to LGBTQ+ communities online when they could be watching adds for sportsbet.
I am 100 per cent supportive of eliminating bullying and fake information from online platforms. The easiest way to do that is to be able to utilise existing laws, and the easiest way to do that is to ensure there are no fake accounts. Your digital, online life is your real life. If you want to make comments, that's fine, but it should be as you, as a verified account. This means everyone knows who it is that makes those comments, that you can be found and prosecuted under existing laws, just as you would if you express those opinions in a newspaper, for example, or you went on to a television station and said something similar.
Contact an Aussie senator about this shit. They’re trying to slide it under all the USpol news.
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wolfstargazer · 2 days ago
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Madam Puddifoots - @wolfstarmicrofic - word count: 636
Remus didn't know how it had happened. But he had suddenly found himself on what, to all outward appearances, looked like a date with Sirius Black.
He should have been more careful. A trip to Hogsmeade this close to a full moon could bring added complications. When he'd woken up that morning his head had already been swimming, and there was the tell-tale queasiness in the pit of his stomach that had made breakfast impossible to eat.
Peter had asked him if he was okay. James had offered to stay back to keep him company. But Remus had rallied, insisting he was fine, convincing the others if not quite himself that fresh air and distraction would do him the world of good.
He had very quickly realised, however, that this had been a mistake. James and Peter had dashed off to Zonkos but Sirius had hung back, his watchful eyes on Remus as Remus, out of breath and light headed, suddenly found himself leaning against a gatepost to keep himself upright.
"I knew I shouldn't have listened," Sirius said as he dashed over and placed a steadying arm about Remus' shoulder. Remus gave a thin smile. "You've always been a terrible liar."
"I'll be fine," Remus insisted breathlessly. Sirius rose an eyebrow, unconvinced. "I'll be better soon. I just need some-"
"Tea," Sirius finished, knowing Remus' tendency to imbue his favourite infusion, spiked with honey, with magical, restorative properties that the Muggle version definitely didn't possess.
Sirius took over, steering Remus down the path with single-minded determination. Only when they were outside Madam Puddifoot's did Remus hesitate, his eyes moving from couple to couple inside the tea shop, as he said, "We can't go in here."
"Why not?" Sirius asked.
Remus looked at the chintz curtains, the wallpaper with enchanted roses that bloomed as you looked at them, and the couples hand in hand across the tables.
"Well...I...it's..."
"You need tea. This place serves tea." Sirius opened the gate and jostled Remus through it.
There were two tables outside that were already occupied, but the last one had just become free. Sirius steered Remus towards it, and Remus had to conceed he was happy to sit down as Sirius sat opposite and opened the menu.
"Now, what shall we get? You'll want tea, of course. Disgusting stuff if you ask me. Don't they serve coffee? And you should probably eat. Something sweet but simple. I saw you didn't eat anything at breakfast. What's good here, do you think?"
Sirius was speaking fast and had waved over a waitress who had been watching them with interest before he'd placed an order. Tea. And cake. And a few scones. That was sure to sort things.
Remus was keenly aware of all the eyes upon them. He could feel himself turning pink, his embarrassment at least a distraction from the faintness that seemed to be subsiding.
Sirius had leant back in his chair and had noticed Remus' discomfort.
"What's the matter?" Sirius asked as the tea arrived.
"They're staring," Remus said.
"Who?" Sirius ignored the tea and started in on the cake.
Remus nervously cleared his throat. "Everyone."
For the first time Sirius looked around them, his eyes moving from couple to couple, before he gave a sharp bark of laughter.
"Honesty, Moony, anyone would think you're embarrassed to be seen with me."
"I'm not-"
"I'll have you know there are a great number of girls who'd be thrilled to join me for tea at Madam Puddifoot's."
"You'd best find one of those to keep you company then," Remus shot back, his humour returning as his nausea subsided.
Sirius cocked an eyebrow. Remus raised his cup.
"Feeling better I take it?" Sirius said.
"Much." Remus returned.
Sirius smiled, shook his head, and said, "That's good. Now drink your tea."
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h50europe · 2 days ago
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8.06 post mortem - Buck/Tommy - General - 9-1-1 Zombified
Many of us wondered why a cut emergency case from episode 7.04 was used. A novelty and if you look closely, you'll notice that the characters appeared very different from how they did in the rest of season 8, and the scenes felt erratic. This inconsistency is reminiscent of the writing from Andrew Meyers, who also wrote episode 7.04. However, in that episode, he had a co-writer who was clearly more talented. Episode 8.06 was poorly written compared to 7.04. Alone the scene in the beginning. Buck could have pointed out that this chick was interrupting the date he had with his boyfriend. Tommy then mentioned the Kinsey scale
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Our walking encyclopedia had no idea what his boyfriend was talking about. Seriously? Also, Buck doesn't want to buy a present for their 6-month anniversary, and Tommy gives him 2 Lakers baseball cards and awkwardly mentions that Buck could go with Eddie? Is this dinner supposed to be romantic? Well, they could have gone to McDonalds. Meyers should have consulted his co-writer at this point; we're heading straight for disaster. Then Tim had this wonderful idea with Abby and thought it was hilarious. The guy's humour isn't just weird, it's kind of crude. Abby never mentioned that she went out with another guy from the 118. Isn't that weird? No one ever knew about it? Not Hen, not Chim? For two years? Did Tommy keep her locked in his basement? This plot is so poorly constructed that it's cringe-worthy at best. And that's when Himbo's jaw hit the floor… along with the audience.
The only good scene was Josh's GLEE speech. And I may be reading between the lines, but I felt that the way Josh talked about post and past GLEE and how Buck can't blame Tommy for his actions because times were different was a wink and a nod to the haters. I really had the impression that this was a cunning move to address why Tommy was who he was back then and why he has changed now.
But seconds later I nearly choked on my drink, and I can tell you it's orgasmic when a sip of Pepsi comes out of your nose, when Maddie said, "She wondered how many men Abby had turned gay." Because I was chatting to a friend before I watched the episode and I almost said the same thing. I live in Europe, so I watched it the next day, knowing what was coming, but nothing about that particular scene. Which, frankly, was terrible.
Forgive me for ignoring the emergencies in this episode. They were repetitive, to say the least, just with different protagonists.
So far we have a recycled episode, a recycled ex, a recycled emergency and a recycled scenario, Maddy is pregnant (hooray). It begins to reek of decay.
Brownie points to those who aren't already traumatised or bored to death. Now for the highlight: Tommy shows up at Buck's apartment in a great mood. He is looking forward to a date with his friend and hot sex as the icing on the cake (that's what I had in mind). Tommy gets suspicious when Buck asks him to sit down. It doesn't take long before he pulls out his phone and shows his friend photos of Abby and a younger Buck. This is followed by an awkward explanation of why he didn't share the news in the restaurant, and Tommy's reaction is a little awkward too. But this is only the overture to the worst retconning I have seen on television in a long time. The coincidence is swept under the carpet in the blink of an eye, and now it gets creepy.
Compare the scene in the coffee shop with this one. It has the same structure, bit by bit. Buck invites Tommy to the wedding in the coffee shop, and Tommy says, "What?" Here it is: "I want you to move in with me." We have a mashup of the first kiss and the coffee shop scene, and Oliver plays it similarly. The worst part is when Tommy turns into his zombie version. Excellently played by Lou. No doubt about it. He gave it his all. He maimed that shitty script, which felt like Meyers had raided AO3, picked the worst written fics and went for the most cringe-worthy insult he could find for a bisexual. "I was your first, but I won't be your last." Hello? This topic only comes to Tommy's mind after he is asked to move in together? I was expecting "I can't move in with you because I wouldn't know where to put my car lift and Muay Thai studio". No, it's because all the trust and love Tommy put in Buck is wiped out by the retconning of Tommy's personality. He succumbs to total chaos. This is not the Tommy we met in S7 and certainly not the one we met in 8.05. Fuck me! It didn't make sense. We would have needed a lot more background information ON SCREEN to make it believable. A scene from Tommy's past. Who hurt him so badly? It wasn't Abby. She only managed to traumatise Buck. Was it after he met Abby? Was it another guy?
Hello writers, are you still in your right mind? We have no clues. Neither the loyal fans and certainly not the new ones. You're reducing a character to a sad laughing stock. You rob him of all his merits, which you had Buck recite like a poem in school. And then you expect us to believe it? You steamroll over everything that's been painstakingly built up to this episode? It's actually convenient, I let the whole relationship run off screen. We don't see any flying lessons together, no training together, no cosy get-togethers in front of the TV, no exchange of affection, nothing. It's all headcanon. Guys, I've seen shows and movies where a sequence like this lasted five minutes and you knew where the couple stood. Maybe a flashback or two into Tommy's past would have helped. But no, instead the audience had to put up with the same old nonsense. A ridiculous story about an urn, a guy who sneezes and his intestines fall out, a kid who doesn't fall down a drain but slips down a pipe. They give us nothing, but we're supposed to believe everything, retconning is so great. If any of us wrote fanfiction like that, we'd be banned from AO3. And as if that wasn't enough, Tommy stands up and says, "Believe me, I didn't see this coming either. Tell me, were you on drugs when you were writing? There are a thousand ways to respond sensibly to "Let's move in together" without turning it into such a dumpster fire. The crowning glory of all this madness is when Tommy says "I'll see you around Buck" instead of Evan (the same words he said to Evan when he left him standing outside the restaurant on their first date). Where did that come from? It's as if Tommy had lost all respect for his lover, or as if he wanted to punch him in the face while he was already on the ground. We, the viewers, also had this feeling. And Tommy's behaviour was completely disturbed. I wonder if he checked himself into a mental facility right after that.
I won't say anything about the rest of the episode because I'm a polite person.
Conclusion: Please take the pen away from this lunatic and never let him write anything again or give him a co-writer like in 7.04. The guy is totally unhinged.
Extra brownies, you made it!
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girlwithadragonheart · 23 hours ago
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I need to yap desperately about one single gripe I have with this game. MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD read at your own discretion
The first half is me ranting about how much certain things mean to me and how impacted I was, and the actual gripe comes closer to the end.
I'll preface this by saying this post is about Varric's death and my rage and despair regarding it, but more so about my Rook's.
I've seen people who said they picked up on the hints about whatnot, who knew before the Fade Prison. I was not one of those people. I was so relieved when I saw him after the Prologue that I didn't think twice, because I knew that it would destroy me the second shit started going wrong.
I was already not having a good time when I started the game simply because Varric was getting older. I don't handle aging well or death, and his design showing his age, and the comments he would make about "getting too old for this" just made my heart break.
And then shit got worse. I sobbed disgustingly when that knife went into Varric's chest.
After Rook woke up from talking to Solas and she heard Varric, I was so gods damned relieved. And my Rook was better taken care of by Varric in that year she spent with him than she was in the rest of her entire life.
I cried from the end of Ghilan'nain's fight until the romance scene and on and off after that. I got so used to visiting Varric just to be comforted by his presence. Inquisition was the biggest part of my life for a year and a half when I was just a kid.
I did really bad middle school age writing for it but regardless of the quality, those characters were built up in my head becoming even more than they were in the game. Varric was my biggest support character through everything I was going through at the time.
I don't talk about it much, but I didn't have a great childhood, and I know a lot of people didn't, but I coped with it through writing and video games. Varric was the one supporting me through the abuse I suffered and writing was the way I processed how bad things really were.
When Rook was in the prison she said "What am I going to find here?" And Varric said "I think you already know, kid." I DIDN'T until he said that. The second he said that my entire chest tightened and I just said "No" out loud as I watched Rook find his body.
Now for my real complaint!!!
Rook never gets the chance to grieve Varric. They go from talking to him every day to finding out he's dead and it was all a lie. I have personally never been more fucking pissed at Solas than I am now. But Rook comes back and they have that kind of "closing off" scene with Varric's empty bed (which was so hard to go through btw). And then they fuck their pookie LIKE I CANNOT BE THE ONLY ONE UPSET ABT THAT
FYM I gotta find out my dad is dead and then Rook is up for boning like there's no fucking way unless it's to cope. And at least pertaining to the Lucanis romance, Rook is processing everything that happened and they can say "So much has happened, I just don't know how to feel."
And rather than getting to process that in some kind of way, the devs said nah this scene serves one singular purpose, and Lucanis says "I do" and then dicks them down.
Personally, I felt very dismissed despite being overjoyed about finally having the romance scene, I couldn't even enjoy it with everything that happened prior.
Rook deserved the chance to completely break down after everything they went through. Tbh i don't know how they kept it together. Varric said "don't get all misty eyed" and i thought to myself that's way too delicate a term for what's happening here, I was fully ugly crying.
Fuck your "I had a good run" I still need you bitch.
All this to say I'm very upset, and I'm running my second playthrough and every time I look at, hear, or talk to Varric I tear up again. Wtf Bioware.
Rook should've gotten the chance to actually talk about what Solas did to them, especially in the sense that he made them believe Varric was still there. Or at least get to properly grieve the person who was their closest friend for a long time.
I have very strong feelings about this obviously
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multipleoccupancy · 21 hours ago
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The Inspector nodded to Violet as she greeted him and then gave a short and quiet hum of agreement at her dismissive reply. Taking mental notes of her attitude and deciding he didn't much like it but she was at least holding her own for now and had not done anything outwardly troubling. He turned his attention back to Theo who was still considerably uncomfortable but had put his hand on Mauve's as it rested on his shoulder.
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"I work for an organisation who specialise in things like this," he gestured to the monster on the floor, "I and many other agents strive tirelessly and endlessly to keep people safe and on more than several occasions already saved these United States and even the world from this danger and I think that you," he pointed to Theo specifically for now, "might be the sort of person who could help us."
Theo looked over at Mauve, amazement in his eyes as it had been exactly what they had talked about, an official branch helping to save the world from monsters! Their agent idea had already been done and here was a man offering it all to them... or just to him? He looked back to the agent.
"Now I have an offer to make you. You can come with us and we are interested in putting you through school, getting you into the FBI Academy for you to follow that path which you have expressed previously. We'll wipe everything clean, you'll be cleared as innocent and wrongly interned in this ward so that you can walk around free and innocent. Your parents won't have to pay a cent, you will be sponsored through collage and you will work hard to achieve the results necessary to become an FBI agent." The inspector waited for a moment while Theo clearly observed him, he was after all the man who had put him inside in the first place and he was offering him everything he wanted on a plate, just like that. "On the condition that you work for us. You do as we say, you protect our secret from everyone including family and friends, no one can know. You do exactly as you are told and follow every instruction we issue you to the letter."
The Inspector knew that was less appetising as an end point but he leaned forward and looked Theo directly in the eye, ignoring Violet completely for now, she wasn't who he was after. "Or," his voice had dropped to a more threatening tone, "you can stay in here and become nothing more than a drooling mess until the end of your life. Stuck with absolutely no way out. You will stay here, where no one will believe you, where you will one day get one shock therapy session too many." He eyed Theo who gulped loudly, terrified of that thought and squeezing Violet's hand on his shoulder. "This is a one time offer, lad. What's it going to be?"
Theo opened his mouth but it was dry inside, it was as if he had just lost his voice, the man had offered him everything he had ever wanted and now was threatening to force him through his worst nightmare. However, he couldn't leave Mauve. "My friend helped me, Mauve needs to come too." He insisted, "We both deserve to be out of this ward. Please, promise me that she will be freed with me." The Inspector's lip curled and he looked to Violet, one eye brow raised.
"She will have her own deal." He said lowly and then offered his hand out for Theo to shake. "Now or never kid, I am not playing around, that deal has a time limit of seconds. You shake my hand and get out of here today or I get up, walk out and leave you here to rot." Theo's heart raced in his chest, his eyes were wide and his breath was almost frozen in his lungs, stinging him and aching at every bruise, shock, or most recently stab and bite he'd ever had in that ward. He couldn't go through more of it and with Mauve getting her own deal to leave, Theo took the Inspector's hand and shook it.
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𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐎 & 𝐕𝐈𝐎𝐋𝐄𝐓 @multipleoccupancy
Violet quickly fell asleep, but she woke up just as fast, startled by a nightmare. After that, she didn't dare fall back asleep, discreetly observing the orderly as he cleaned up the whole cell. It wasn't too hard to pretend to be asleep, lying down next to Theo. After a while, the cell was perfectly clean (save for the dead monster in the corner), but Violet wished the orderly would have given them clean pajamas too. She was still covered in blood, but it had dried up now, forming an uncomfortable layer over her skin.
With her eyes half-closed, she noticed the two men as they stood outside the room. Violet didn't know who they were, but she assumed they were the Delta Green agents sent to offer Theo his "deal". When the orderly went to wake Theo up, she didn't bother acting as if she was sleeping, simply sitting up on the bed.
Theo's warning confirmed her thoughts: this was a Delta Green agent. But not just any agent. The agent who had framed Theo and sent him to the ward. Her look hardened, and she put a protective hand on Theo's shoulder.
The man sat in front of them, introducing himself. "Hello, inspector," she replied coldly. Violet was unmoved by the agent's praise. She really didn't care if he was impressed! As far as she was concerned, he was a wicked man. But she knew she couldn't make a scene, and risk Theo's deal in the process. She had to grit her teeth and swallow all the things she really wanted to say.
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"It ain't our first rodeo," she replied dismissively, hinting at Theo's first monster encounter, and her own "encounter", which was in her file.
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v88sy · 2 days ago
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I really do think Tommy was coming from a place of feeling inadequate, being scared of getting hurt, and feeling like he will never be able to live up to this grand picture Buck had painted of him just a few sentences earlier.
He called him transformative. Brave.
All of it, including the relationship itself, is still new, and Buck is still figuring things, along with himself, out. There's nothing wrong to that.
Yeah, the wording didn't come off the best, I'll agree, but I really feel like Tommy is just scared of what will happen once the new wears off and Buck starts to see him as he sees himself.
Whether or not that's an inevitable truth remains to be seen, but to Tommy, it already is. It's probably already happened with partners in the past. "But they usually aren't" (first being last) reads to me as someone who's been there before, maybe more than once.
Tommy knows he's not the forever guy, and that was fine. Until he didn't want it to be.
And yes, let's be honest here. Asking someone to move in with you before you have even said I love you, or known them well enough to know they were engaged, is impulsive.
I also think Tommy got spooked by realizing Buck's "himbo" past. Not because he's judgemental about it, but because he wonders if Buck will ever want that again, same as Buck worrying that Tommy stringing Abby along meant he could do it again.
Bottom line, they were both wrong, and they were both wrong in how they reacted. They should have talked it out better. Tommy shouldn't have left, but I get why he did. Buck should've fought for him to stay.
If we never get them back together in that capacity, I at least hope we can see some on screen resolution where they make peace.
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mylifeisfruk4ever · 2 days ago
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In Dick's defense, he had a head injury, was tired, and was running on gallons of energy drinks that would have made Bane pale.
(And no Barbara, he didn't have a myopia problem, stop scheduling an eye doctor appointment!)
It didn't help that he was pretty annoyed with Bruce - again - and pretty irritable.
So when he saw (a) Robin in one of his rare collaborations with Batman for a mass escape from Arkham, he was angry.
He wasn't mad at Jason…not anymore, at least. But Bruce had promised that he would not take the boy, still with basic training and with more street experience than real training, to face the big boys.
Jason wasn't ready. What was in his head, did he want his new bird to die? So much for the desire to keep children safe!
Irritated, he grabbed the child by the cloak and ignored his protests.
"Hey!"
“You shouldn't be here, little bird,” Nightwing growled, irritated. “Didn't the old man tell you to stay at home?”
“Um…no?”
He snorted, “Figures. Hypocritical bastard…if I had done it, he would have grounded me for months! But not you, you're already his favorite and..."
“Nigthwing,” Batman interrupted, landing in front of them. He stared at them, “What are you doing?”
He rolled his eyes, “Can't you see? I'll get Robin back in line."
“Nightwing…”
“What, only you can do that? Or does he have the green light for everything? Way to play favorites, Batman..."
"Nightwing," Batman said again, more decisive, but not angry. If anything, he seemed confused. “That's not Robin.”
“What?”
The adult repeated, “That's not Robin. He is at home, as he should, with Agent A.”
“What, already replaced the new model with a newer one?” 
It was mean. He recognized it too. But he felt angry that the cloak had been taken from him and then given to another. He had a right to be angry  about his name being given to someone else.
“Nightwing…I don't know who he is.”
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hyenafu · 2 days ago
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I know this might seem like a bit of a random question, but what are some criticisms of Slightly Damned you can't stand, and what are some you think are at least somewhat valid? I only ask because I do have a few problems with the comic (not really gonna go into here because I don't want to come off as too critical obviously) but I feel like some of the more noteworthy ones have been too long established to just change it altogether, and the best one can do is make something better from its foundation (which I must say, you've done a really good job at ^^)
The complaints that I think are the most unfair are by bigots who think my comic is only getting more inclusive because I'm pandering to wokeness or whatever. These people are also the most likely to misgender me and have no idea what they're talking about. They just can't stand the bare minimum of gay and are often hypocritical, using fallacies as the basis of their arguments. It's tempting to want to argue back, but when has that ever worked on the internet? I think the most valid complaint is that the pacing of the comic is too slow. Sure. Not much I can do about that one. My comic alone doesn't pay all my bills. If I focus exclusively on work, I get depressed, so I have to goof off sometimes. I'm just one person. I don't have a team. I'm doing the best I can already. Another valid complaint is that people don't like my blend of humor and drama. Sometimes readers find it inappropriate or jarring. It's valid because I recognize it as a difference of opinion and understand why they feel that way. But I don't care. I like my weird mix of goofy faces and drama. I sometimes make jokes during periods of great stress in real life. I love all the wacky faces and over-the-top cartoon action among dire circumstances in comics like One Piece and Usagi Yojimbo. Like, it's just my style, man I don't seek out unsolicited advice about my comic. Some people may think that's snobbish of me, but the truth is, very little of what you find that way is actually valuable.
"And as to those critics, she said that she’s managed to do something that might make us all better off- she doesn’t read the comment sections. In perhaps the most roundabout poignant part of the talk, she likened receiving feedback about her work as being like consuming food. She would take a pie from someone she knew and trusted but compared taking unsolicited barbs from strangers as “licking a handle on the subway.” She used to pay very close attention to that kind of critique because she felt that it somehow would make her a better creator but ultimately decided that it was only toxic." - I HAVE SEEN OLIVIA JAIMES, THE CARTOONIST BEHIND THE NEW NANCY, by Rocko Jerome (2018)
Besides the outright hateful sentiments, a lot of unsolicited criticism can be categorized as "I don't like this story because it didn't do what I wanted it to do." Which is fine. I do the same thing when I try to process stories and talk to my friends about them.
But I don't get in the author's face to tell them I think they did a bad job. At the end of the day, no matter how crap I think someone's story might be, I'm not psychic. I don't really know if they did exactly what they set out to do. For example, people have never stopped giving me crap about the death of certain characters. But their whining has only made my convictions stronger. I don't like when other stories don't take deaths seriously, with a real sense of permanence and grief that is not easily solved. To someone else, seeing that character be alive might have solved all sorts of problems they had-- but that's not my story. I've had someone tell me that the focus on Buwaro and Kieri's mushy romance is too distracting to the main story. I don't think that person knew that a large part of why I started making this comic in the first place was as a vehicle for my OTP. I also want to make said vehicle entertaining and worthwhile. If I didn't succeed for that person, that's fine. But don't tell me that half the reason I made the comic is distracting from it. What do they know about what I want? What do you really know about what the author wanted to achieve? That isn't to say that my comic is immune to scrutiny. Of course it has problems; every story has problems, depending on your perspective and the basis by which it's getting judged. I've solicited and received thoughtful criticism and helpful advice from teachers, my advisor, my friends, and from reading/watching tutorials. Some I agreed with, others I chose to ignore. Sometimes it just took a while for me to come around. I hope I never stop learning and improving. Like you said, I have to keep working with the foundation I already set. But I don't feel trapped by it; my creativity is being challenged in new ways. I have a lot of playing pieces and now I get to see what kinds of connections I can make between them with my older, more experienced (both good and bad) mind. Since Slightly Damned is a story serialized over a long period of time, a certain amount of it is made up as I go along. I do have plans and goals, of course, but I'm also discovering this world alongside my readers.
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averysmolkirbo · 3 days ago
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"Woahhh, am i in the afterlife?-"
"DUDE. WHAT THE HELL MAN. OUT OF ALLL THE MORTALS I COULDVE GIVEN A GIFT TO, I CHOOSE THE ONE GUY WHO NEVER FIGURES IT OUT???"
"Wha- are you like god or something? wait, I HAD A POWER??"
"YEA. I GAVE YOU THE POWER TO FREEZE TIME AT WILL AND YOU NEVER DID IT??? Waste of a perfectly good gift!!"
"HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW. I WAS NEVER TOLD ABOUT THIS?"
"YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO MAKE THE DAMN BALONEY SANDWICH."
"wha- what does a baloney sandwich have to do with this???"
"I WATCHED YOU FOR LIKE A MONTH. AND YOU ATE A BALONEY SANDWICH FOR LIKE EVERY MEAL. YOU JUST STOPPED ONE DAY AND NEVER DID IT AGAIN. WHAT THE HELL, MAN. YOU HAD LIKE 50 FUCKNGI YEARS TO EAT ONE FUCKIGN SANDWICH AND YOU COUDLNT DO THAT?"
"Wait. Is this about that time i was like, 20??? I swore off of baloney sandwiches forever after i found my girlfriend cheating on me. That was her favorite. i only had it cuz i was with her."
(mortal, under his breath)
"....That bitch really took my virginity and my godly powers??? DAMN IT!"
"AW OF FUCKING COURSE I CHOOSE THE ONE THING YOU NEVER ATE AGAIN. SHIT. "
"ok so i still dont see why i had to eat a baloney sandwich to use the power. why couldnt i just *use* it. why is this MY fault. YOU shouldve just made it easier to use."
"Wow, i give you powers and this is the fucking thanks i get? See if i ever help you again..."
"Ok so like the thing is im not actually powerful enough to give you a gift that powerful no strings attached. I had to choose an activation condition for it to work."
"And you chose BALONEY SANDWICH? not something like BREATHING?"
"I didn't want to make it obvious!! I wanted to have FUN with it but clearly you were too DENSE for it. Baloney sandwich was the most consistent non-obvious thing you did!! how was i supposed to know you were gonna stop the NEXT DAY?"
"Ok. So while this obviously sucks for both of us, can i use it now? In my afterlife?"
"If you can make a baloney sandwich. I dont see why not."
"Ok. Cool. Is there like a godly pantry i can get the ingredients from, or...."
"Yes, actually, down the hall, to the left, 2 doors down."
"Sweet."
"Oh yea i forgot to mention we only have whole wheat bread"
" >:( aw man. I hate whole wheat. It tastes like shit. What else, you're out of baloney?"
"No......"
"why'd you say it like that"
--------
"Ok i found your stupid bread. but where's the baloney. You said you had some."
"We do, but-"
"ok so where is it."
"-but we keep it in the underworld."
"Why??? What do you guys have against baloney??? Why is only IT condemned to the underworld???"
"No reason! I swear! the guy who runs the place just REALLY likes it and none of us really do, so we just let him keep it down there"
"Yknow since he's like. Already stuck working in the basement. we thought we'd give him SOMETHING."
*one very long and perilous journey for baloney later*
"ok YOU COULDVE AT LEAST TOLD ME HOW HARD THAT WAS GONNA BE."
"I told you, man. He REALLY likes baloney."
"Whatever. i ate your stupid sandwich. how do i activate it."
"Try clapping."
*nothing happens*
"What. Why didnt it work. I ate your stupid baloney sandwich."
"Did you remember to add the mayo?"
"MOTHERFUCKER-"
You're a god who has decided to give a mortal a gift. You decided to surprise them by not telling them about their new power. After a full life of normalcy, you greet them in the afterlife confused and angry as to how they didn't discover their power.
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blueishspace · 3 days ago
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Hero, Villain, God 3
(Prev) (Next) (First)
*Grian's pov*
Being Poultryman was more fun then you thought it would be and that's saying a lot considering you already had high expectations. These last few days have been the most fun you have had in the last 10 billion years! It's just so different to actually be involved directly... People actually thank you for trowing eggs at other people.
And now you went one step further then just trowing eggs at criminala, you managed to fill mayor Ren's house with chickens! Every single room is filled witch chickens. Bathroom? Chickens. Kitchen? Chickens. Weird suspicious basement permeated with metallic scent? You better believe it, that's filled with chickens too.
You honestly can't wait for his reaction...
Thinking about it, it's weird how little surveilance the mayor has in his house... you got in without having to use any divine ability except for those that make up Poultryman's powers. And you would have gotten away with it too if it hadn't been for him.
"Stop righg there, scoundrel!" It's Hotguy to interrupt if it wasn't clear, you don't see why the hero association would send the number one hero after you but this is going to be fun. Any other god would have just smited him for interrupting but that would just be...so boooring. No, you are going to punish him in a much more... subtle way... ...Mentally.
"Hello there, Averageguy" You can see him process what you said in real time.
"It's Hotguy! Not ...that!"
"So narcisistic, no no no, you really need to chill down or I'll have to demote you to Mediocreguy"
"MEDIOCRE!? You can't just demote me!" Oh, he is fun, he's so sensitive to mockery.
"Too bad, you are Mediocreguy now, told you that you needed to chill down and you didn't listen".
At that he starts chasing you, took him long enough to remember his job is to catch you, of course you aren't going to be catched that easily. You are stil agod after all.
"I'll have you know I'm very chill you pesky bird!" Pesky bird? That's a new one.
"You are neither chill nor hot" You jump in the air and land behind him. "More of Lukewarmguy really".
Well, you could just lose him now but you wanna have a bit more fun before you leave.
"Come back here! You oversized chicken!"
Well now he's going to get egged, he brought it upon himself really- oh? One moment... You perceive a woman reporting for live television nearby... You suddenly have a devious idea and ou lunge towards her general direction.
*The following Clip was taken from Hermitopia Daily*
"-Shareholders predict that the new policy will be a strong step foward towards-"
*Suddenly a chicken themed man jumps in in the middle of the live recording*
"Hello there spectators! Sorry to interrupt!"
"P-poultry man!?"
*The man in the chicken costume turns towards the camera and takes out like ten 100 dollar bills*
"Hey mate, I'll give you these if you let me borrow that camera for a few seconds"
*The camera men speaks in the background*
"Huh...just don't break it? Please?"
"Thanks!"
*There is some shaking as Poultryman takes the camera and points it towards a very angry and tired looking Hotguy.*
"And there folks at home we have Loserguy."
"LOSERGUY!?"
"I know, before meeting you I thought you were cool too! Never meet your heroes they say, that's because they are very underwhelming."
*Hotguy jumps towards the camera, there's some more shaking and then the camera is pointing towards an Hotguy whose face is faceplanted onto the ground and who is groaning onto the floor*
"Well ... first of all, attacking me? That was rude. Second of all, if you are going to jump someone at least don't fall, It's just embarassing."
*Hotguy gets up with another frustrated groan and takes out his bow and arrow*
...
"Well, time to give back the camera to it's owner! Wouldn't want an arrow to break it after all!"
"You! Come back here!"
"Toodles Cringeguy!"
*The feed cuts for a few seconds, once everything is back online Hotguy is looking around like he's searching for something and Poultryman is gone... The reporter seems to snap out of her shock, the clip ends*
*Scar's pov*
You feel like a misbehaving child waiting for punishment, you are sitting in Cub's lab and he's frantically walking back and forth.
"It ... It wasn't that bad?" You don't know why you try to argue, you regret it immediately.
"Not that bad?! Scar- *sigh*"
Ok so maybe it was, but you can't stand the idea of Cub being mad at you... Or even worse: disappointed in you.
"I'll just...catch him next time! Yeah!"
"Not only did you fail you task, not only did you push yourself way too much AGAIN but you made a fool out of yourself on LIVE TELEVISION Scar. Do you even know how much respectability you lost because of this?"
Ok... Maybe It's better if you just don't speak...
"The screenshot of you laying on the ground is now a meme template! I don't even know how that has already happened since It's been two hours at most."
Still, you will catch that Pesky bird, no one calls you Cringeguy.
*Grian's pov*
...
You're the one that started the Hotguy template, you don't regret it one bit.
...
The internet is having a field day with it, Hotguy's pr team is definitely not.
...
This is so much fun already.
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kaliforniahigh · 3 days ago
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imagine Making Folio a big home cooked meal for him and the guys when they come home from tour cause he loves your cooking. (And then him asking for his dessert later wink wink)
Cooking is my love language, so I would totally love doing this.
The boys and Folio already expect it whenever they're coming home. When you started doing it, Folio made it clear that you didn't have to, but you told him it was fine. You knew that on the road or when they were staying at hotels, they didn't always eat the best. The least they deserved was a home-cooked meal when they got back.
They could smell your food from the driveway, their mouths already watering, but having to wheel the suitcases up the staits before they could sit down and eat.
Folio would greet you with a long hug and a lot of kisses. Not wanting to leave your embrace, but knowing he has to help the guys with whatever they needed to unload.
Everyone sits down to eat with a big sigh, feeling the exhaustion from the travel.
After one hour, the food has been devoured and before you have the chance to start doing the dishes, Folio grabs you by the hand and leads you towards you bedroom, telling you they'll deal with everything tomorrow.
You don't complain, and you both get in the shower together, washing away the day.
"Can't wait to have my desert soon", he says and takes a handful of you ass in his hands. You smile and turn to face him.
"Are you sure? You look tired baby", you said, taking his face in your hands.
"I am, but I'm more in need of your body than I'm tired", he circles his arms around your waist.
"Well, then. Let's hurry up in this shower"
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yaoireview · 2 days ago
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review sockathan ! 👻👻👻
woah how'd you make that green
SOCKATHAN YAOI REVIEW
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Disclaimer: This will contain spoilers (kind of) for Welcome to Hell 2 Part 1 and Welcome to Hell. You should probably go watch that. Its made by Erica Wester and its PRETTY cool.)
My Yaoi Entrepreneurs, I'll be blunt with you. I know we've ALL seen gay people, maybe in the streets, maybe at the park. You might even see one in your home now, so lets be honest with ourselves. Sock is DEFINITELY gay, bisexual at LEAST.
The OTHER one on the other hand.. its a little bit harder to say.. I'll probably find something though..
Lets make one thing clear, when I say Yaoi in this review. I don't mean ANYTHING inappropriate. Its just my special way of saying gay people.. I'm kinda magical in that sense.
Lets just get the first one done and over with a simple section I like to call:
EVIDENCE 1: SOCK IN GENERAL
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okay so FIRST of all the FIRST time we see sock, they call Jonathan "hot stuff" while being in a fridge. I'm not sure about you but that's love if I ever saw it.
After that they introduce you to Sock killing his parents. One key point after another. If Sock being gay wasn't important, then WHY was it shown BEFORE telling us Sock's (other) main trait. Checkmate liberals.
Sock would then get the report from Mephistopheles, and you COULD say its just because the camera zoomed in, but its literally the most light ever seen in Sock's eyes.
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And then Sock went on to ruin Jonathan's day, making him look crazy, and Jonathan SOMEHOW got blamed for knocking down that desk, I swear I think the teachers just hate him. I'm not sure about you but I certainly cant KNOCK over a desk thats right next to me.
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He was WRITING too.. would a guilty man of desk flipping WRITE?? NO!!
And not to mention that Sock made Jonathan look DUMB in front of the faceless brothers which was probably the closest time that Sock did their job right.
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Sock absolutely ruined it today.. but can you blame them? They're new to the job, give them some SLACK.
But the upcoming days, Sock was so whimsical.
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Yeah SURE. Sock is still telling Jonathan to kill himself, but they just don't want to get fired!!
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Not to mention the fact that they stared at Jonathan while they were taking a piss, but there's nothing odd about that.
And also near the end, Mephistopheles calls sock out on liking the guy, and Sock stutters. You just have to take my word for it.
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SOCK IN GENERAL 2 [PART 1]
If you saw Welcome to Hell 2 [Part 1], you already know what I'm gonna comment about. Sock went on to call Jonathan's mother, hot. They then went on to say "Must be where you got it from, huh? You definitely got her butt at least."
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When Jonathan goes on a walk and Sock follows them and says after Jonathan says he doesn't wanna be friends with them. (We'll get back to that)
"Oh wow, come to think of it, You don't really have ANYONE do YOU? What's that feel like? Knowing you're gonna die alone." to which Jonathan snaps back with "I dunno Sock, you tell me."
Now at first, this looks like a scene of ANTI SOCKATHAN propaganda, but think with me here, yaoiers. How would Jonathan know that Sock died alone??
I understand if he just guessed, since sock DOES look like someone who would die alone, or he just said whatever comeback that came to his head but if not, Sock ALREADY told Jonathan about their past life.
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If what I KNOW is true, Sock VENTED to Jonathan about their life before they died in LESS than a week, since Sock just now sees Jonathan's mother in the first part, and due to a comment made by the creator.
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Sock REALLY trusts this guy, maybe Mephistopheles didn't want to hear them vent, but maybe its JUST because Sock wanted Jonathan to do the same. but they probably didn't.
And then near the end, Sock says to Jonathan when he snatched his employee manual
"Jonathan, if something happens to you-"
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Actually, I think this is pretty weak evidence but I thought I'd include it, since a teacher would say the same thing if a kindergartener was up on a high shelf.
That segment was PRETTY lengthy, but I PROMISE you, the others will be shorter, I just.. didn't expect there to be so much for Sock...
EVIDENCE 2: SOCK SUCKS AT THEIR JOB.
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Jonathan was DEAD ON when they told Sock that they suck at their job. And quite honestly.. I could've done it better.. I could've got Jonathan to kill himself (theoretically) on the FIRST day, and if you wouldn't use my strategy, I promise you that there's probably several other you could use for the teenager that you want them to kill themselves at home.
STEP 1: GRAB A WEAPON
Since Sock is seen to be able to flip over a desk and they're able to HOLD Jonathan's journal (Shock or not), I should THEORITCALLY be able to grab a weapon, now for this strategy, I suggest you pick a nonlethal option, only to have a lethal option around, for this example, I will be using a sledgehammer.
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After swinging that at the noggin, Jonathan would drop unconscious, probably with brain damage (that don't matter though)
STEP 2: POSSESS THE TEENAGER
Now it MAY not be like this in w2h, but Mephistopheles was able to possess Jonathan when he was DEAD (Probably), so It should hopefully work when they're out of consciousness.
STEP 3: KILL YOURSELF.
Alright now I KNOW that sounds bad.. but it wouldn't be MY hands to kill him. Grab the nearby lethal and SHOOT. THAT. TEENAGER!! Your boss may not agree with the logistics of this, but you get the job done.
This simulation was to PROVE that Sock atleast CARES a bit about Jonathan to want to get to know him. and to not kill him on the spot. Now if It was the other way around.. I'm not exactly sure..
EVIDENCE 3: JONATHAN KINDA HATES SOCK
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(he looks like hes standing up to a school bully)
At the beginning of Welcome to Hell, hes clearly annoyed and STILL is annoyed by some of Sock's actions by the end, but he atleast isn't mad enough to NOT act like he could put up with Sock. I think the closest thing to gayness from Jonathan was when he moved the backpack for Sock to sit down.
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In Welcome to Hell 2, he IS PISSED at this guy, and honestly, if Sock kept on knocking down those desks, i CANT blame him..
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Maybe Sock kinda ruined the vibe when they expressed their love for Jonathan's mother, its hard to say really..
Jonathan makes this very clear that he DOESN'T even wanna be Sock's friend, I mean HAVE YOU HEARD THE THEME SONG?
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SUMMARY:
Sock wasn't able to win Jonathan's heart, making him tonight's biggest loser.
YAOI: 6.5/10
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