#i know exactly how we can get them juicy

[travelingtwentysomething]

Bring out the ✨DIMPLES✨

if this were a Taco restaurant, we're making table-side guacamole in them bitches

[physalian]

How to make your writing sound less stiff

Just a few suggestions. You shouldn’t have to compromise your writing style and voice with any of these, and some situations and scenes might demand some stiff or jerky writing to better convey emotion and immersion. I am not the first to come up with these, just circulating them again.

1. Vary sentence structure.

This is an example paragraph. You might see this generated from AI. I can’t help but read this in a robotic voice. It’s very flat and undynamic. No matter what the words are, it will be boring. It’s boring because you don’t think in stiff sentences. Comedians don’t tell jokes in stiff sentences. We don’t tell campfire stories in stiff sentences. These often lack flow between points, too.

So funnily enough, I had to sit through 87k words of a “romance” written just like this. It was stiff, janky, and very unpoetic. Which is fine, the author didn’t tell me it was erotica. It just felt like an old lady narrator, like Old Rose from Titanic telling the audience decades after the fact instead of living it right in the moment. It was in first person pov, too, which just made it worse. To be able to write something so explicit and yet so un-titillating was a talent. Like, beginner fanfic smut writers at least do it with enthusiasm.

2. Vary dialogue tag placement

You got three options, pre-, mid-, and post-tags.

Leader said, “this is a pre-dialogue tag.”

“This,” Lancer said, “is a mid-dialogue tag.”

“This is a post-dialogue tag,” Heart said.

Pre and Post have about the same effect but mid-tags do a lot of heavy lifting.

They help break up long paragraphs of dialogue that are jank to look at

They give you pauses for ~dramatic effect~

They prompt you to provide some other action, introspection, or scene descriptor with the tag. *don't forget that if you're continuing the sentence as if the tag wasn't there, not to capitalize the first word after the tag. Capitalize if the tag breaks up two complete sentences, not if it interrupts a single sentence.

It also looks better along the lefthand margin when you don’t start every paragraph with either the same character name, the same pronouns, or the same “ as it reads more natural and organic.

3. When the scene demands, get dynamic

General rule of thumb is that action scenes demand quick exchanges, short paragraphs, and very lean descriptors. Action scenes are where you put your juicy verbs to use and cut as many adverbs as you can. But regardless of if you’re in first person, second person, or third person limited, you can let the mood of the narrator bleed out into their narration.

Like, in horror, you can use a lot of onomatopoeia.

Drip Drip Drip

Or let the narration become jerky and unfocused and less strict in punctuation and maybe even a couple run-on sentences as your character struggles to think or catch their breath and is getting very overwhelmed.

You can toss out some grammar rules, too and get more poetic.

Warm breath tickles the back of her neck. It rattles, a quiet, soggy, rasp. She shivers. If she doesn’t look, it’s not there. If she doesn’t look, it’s not there. Sweat beads at her temple. Her heart thunders in her chest. Ba-bump-ba-bump-ba-bump-ba- It moves on, leaving a void of cold behind. She uncurls her fists, fingers achy and palms stinging from her nails. It’s gone.

4. Remember to balance dialogue, monologue, introspection, action, and descriptors.

The amount of times I have been faced with giant blocks of dialogue with zero tags, zero emotions, just speech on a page like they’re notecards to be read on a stage is higher than I expected. Don’t forget that though you may know exactly how your dialogue sounds in your head, your readers don’t. They need dialogue tags to pick up on things like tone, specifically for sarcasm and sincerity, whether a character is joking or hurt or happy.

If you’ve written a block of text (usually exposition or backstory stuff) that’s longer than 50 words, figure out a way to trim it. No matter what, break it up into multiple sections and fill in those breaks with important narrative that reflects the narrator’s feelings on what they’re saying and whoever they’re speaking to’s reaction to the words being said. Otherwise it’s meaningless.

—

Hope this helps anyone struggling! Now get writing.

[l4ndoflove]

dj got us fallin' in love

feat. ???

lyrics preview the saudi arabian post-race party gets you stuck in a love triangle with the infamous papaya boys

maddie this was requested by the lovely @littleemmi for the 100 celebration! i'm not telling you who the driver is so you guys can try and figure it out yourselves ;)

with @.haileesteinfeld

norrislando_fans

❤️ 76.3K 💬 11.8K

norrislando_fans lando celebrating in jeddah after the race 💜🎧

comments

user1 celebrating what exactly?

user2 finishing behind piastri again 😂

user3 his last race as the championship leader lol

user4 are you seriously still talking shit about him after he went from p10 to p4

user5 lando hate is so forced i swear

user6 louder please 🙏

user7 OMG DJ LANDO IS BACK

user8 YESSS I MISSED HIM

user9 who is she

user10 a misty memoryyyyy

user11 😐

user12 she's living every fangirl's dream

user13 no bc imagine standing this close to LANDO FREAKING NORRIS

user14 oh to be her

user15 luckiest girl alive 💔

user16 WHY IS HE STARING INTO HER SOUL LIKE THAT LMAO

user17 bro if lando ever looked at me that way i would pass out

user18 where i come from we call that foreplay ☝️

user19 guys please leave them alone they're eye fucking

user20 wait isn't that magui?

user21 clearly not

user22 how are you so sure

user23 fr she's not even showing her face

user24 SOMEONE PLEASE FIND HER @

user25 they definitely kissed after that

lando

🎵 dj got us fallin' in love • usher (feat. pitbull)

❤️ 1.8M 💬 17.3K

liked by youruser, oscarpiastri, maxfewtrell and others

lando sick party

comments

maxfewtrell damn mate chill

maxfewtrell is that even legal 😱

maxfewtrell i hope they kicked your ass out

maxfewtrell kids these days

maxfewtrell jeez

lando stop spamming my comment section you muppet

maxfewtrell i'm the only one acknowledging this dumbass post fuck off

user26 old married couple vibes

lando old 🤨

maxfewtrell married 🤨🤨

user27 didn’t deny the couple bit though

user28 bro was higher than the sky in the first pic

user29 how he felt after taking that photo: 😈🔥🗿

lando pretty much

user30 party lando is my favorite lando

user31 not him tagging a random girl instead of max 💀

maxfewtrell dickhead

user32 HE DID THE WORK FOR US HELP

user33 we're all stalking her profile now right

user34 thank god it wasn't magui

user35 you have no idea how relieved i am

user36 she's actually so pretty what

user37 okay i get why he went for her

user38 10/10 would smash

user39 WOAH BROTHER (me too)

user40 when will it be my turn 😫

user41 relax bro ain't nobody taking her from you

maxfewtrell yeah i wouldn’t be so sure about that

user42 wtf does this mean

user43 MAX TELL US WHAT YOU KNOW

maxfewtrell 🫥

user44 NO WE NEED DETAILS PLEASE

user45 sir??? the lip bite???

youruser

❤️ 34.2K 💬 3,156

liked by bestieuser, lando, oscarpiastri and others

youruser 5k new followers overnight... you guys okay?

comments

bestieuser WHO THAT IN THE BAAAAACK

youruser not you too 🔫😀

bestieuser yes me too

bestieuser girl i told you he was famous

bestieuser you know what they say "with great fucking comes great fame" or whatever

youruser OH MY GOD WE DIDN'T FUCK

youruser STOP SPREADING MISINFORMATION YOU SICK WOMAN

bestieuser you stop spreading your legs first 🙄

youruser i'm blocking you

user46 i was here for two minutes and i already love her

user47 so lando tagged her but she didn't tag him?

user48 probably didn't want the attention

user49 spoiler: she got it anyway because lando doesn't know what "privacy" means

user50 not to be weird but i'd let her step on me

youruser so this is what having a fanboy feels like

bestieuser thought you knew after yesterday

youruser what. is. your. problem.

bestieuser you. gatekeeping all the juicy gossip.

user51 i've never loved someone so much

user52 she's my new favorite person

user53 in my head we're best friends

bestieuser see @.youruser??? they love me 🖕

youruser guys please don't encourage her

user54 BOOO GATEKEEPING IS FOR THE WEAK 👎🍅

❤️ by bestieuser

youruser what did i do to deserve this

user55 that outfit is criminal

user56 what's criminal is that he didn’t take it off

youruser 😦

youruser should i be worried @.lando?

lando nah it happens

user57 THE MULLET IS FIRE

user58 meanwhile oscar chilling in the likes

user59 i wonder if he was with them too

user60 he won so probably yes

f1wags._

❤️ 61.8K 💬 9,416

f1wags._ lando sharing his private jet with a mystery girl in saudi arabia 👀

comments

user61 that ain't no mystery girl that's yn 💀

user62 SHE TROLLED US SO BAD

user63 and she was smooth with it too

user64 "we didn't fuck" well you're about to

user65 someone's joining the high mile club today

user66 DAMN

user67 same outfit, same car, same plane but no they're not together 👍

user68 MAKE IT MAKE SENSE

user69 TAKE ME WITH YOU 🛐

user70 if only i could be a fly on the wall

user71 i bet you'd witness unspeakable things

user72 why did we all collectively decide that they're going to do the nasty 😭

user73 what else would they do?

user74 idk maybe talk??

user75 isn't that a little bit excessive after literally one night of knowing each other

user76 that's how love at first fuck works ig 🤷‍♀️

youruser STOP IT WITH THE SEX JOKES

user77 there she is

user78 who summoned her

user79 hi bae we missed you 🫶

user80 bestie joined the f1 fandom and got traumatized in less than one day

oscarpiastri_fans

❤️ 48K 💬 6,121

liked by bestieuser and others

oscarpiastri_fans @.oscarpiastri and @.youruser today at the mtc!

comments

user81 ✨️what the fuck✨️

user82 did we miss something orrr

user83 that's where lando brought her???

user84 they're so soft couple coded aww

user85 oh okay i kinda ship this

user86 i can't tell if you guys are serious or not

user85 why wouldn't we be?

user86 you thought she was shagging lando until this morning

user87 shagging isn't the word i would've used but i agree

user88 THE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HELLO

user89 she reaches his shoulder i can't 🫠

user90 i don't remember oscar being this tall though

bestieuser he's not but yn is short af sooo

youruser uh fuck you!?

bestieuser me too? isn't lando enough?

youruser everyday i wake up [crying]

f1gossippofficial

❤️ 98.5K 💬 11.1K

liked by bestieuser and others

f1gossippofficial lando and oscar brought a special guest to the paddock and spent the morning together in the mclaren garage 🩷

comments

user91 WHAT IS THIS

user92 are we witnessing landoscar happen in real life

user93 what in the wattpad love triangle

user94 i smell pr stunt

user95 if it is i'm sorry but they're not very good at it 💀

user96 lando should've just stuck with magui at this point

user97 you were all hating on her like two days ago pick a side

user98 what about yn picks a boy first

user99 girl really said: "lando or oscar?" "both. both is good"

user100 can't blame her honestly 🤷‍♀️

user101 okay but seriously who is she dating

user102 who said she's dating anyone

user103 DUDE AREN'T THESE PICTURES ENOUGH 😭😭😭

user104 there's something called "being friends" yk

user105 hate to break it to you but that's not what this is

user106 whatever floats your ship ig

user107 LMAOOO

bestieuser alright folks let's settle this down once and for all

youruser WHY ARE YOU EVERYWHERE

bestieuser shut up and let me do my job

bestieuser so who took my bitch:

bestieuser lando

❤️ 19620

bestieuser oscar

❤️ 10617

bestieuser i see you're all going for the safest answer

bestieuser interesting

youruser why tf did you turn my love life into a multiple choice question

bestieuser "love life" you say? 🧐

bestieuser sorry babe i think everybody saw that 😔🙏

user108 LANDO’S SMILE ❓️❓️❓️

user109 somebody's in looove 🤭

user110 i call oscar

lando youruser oscarpiastri

user111 HARD LAUNCH???

user112 SHE'S SO CUTE STOP

user113 big gremlin and tiny gremlin 💗💗💗

user114 THEY HAVE THE SAME SMILE I CAN'T

bestieuser blink twice if you were forced to do this

youruser 👁👁⚫️⚫️👁👁⚫️⚫️

bestieuser BRO WHAT IS THAT HAHAHA

youruser blinking duh???

youruser i was being held hostage 😰

lando liar

lando 🫵 you wanted this

user115 i'll physically fight anyone who dares to say they're not a couple

oscarpiastri ☝️😮

bestieuser speak up lover boy

user116 yeah girl we figured 🙄

user117 who are you actually going for tho

user118 i NEED to know who took that photo

user119 well we all know lando has a thing for photography

bestieuser fair but do you know who has a thing for the subject 🫢

user120 ???

user121 pretty 🥹

user122 this is too soft i'm gonna cry

user123 now say it with me: they! are! dating!

bestieuser yayyy 🥳

user124 GIRL IT'S TRUE???

bestieuser idk i just love saying random shit and watch you guys freak out ❤️

user125 you scare me

bestieuser yeah i have that effect on people

user126 THE SONG CHOICE AAAAAH

user127 you can't convince me that was casual

user128 THERE SHE GOES (my ship 🥰)

user129 help now i'm confused

user130 me too i have no idea what to think anymore

oscarpiastri

❤️ 1.1M 💬 12.2K

liked by youruser, lando, bestieuser and others

oscarpiastri yeah

comments

bestieuser MAMA Y PAPA 🦘🐨🫶

bestieuser fucking finally

bestieuser took you long enough

bestieuser btw where are my credits for the second picture 🤨

bestieuser my professional third wheeling ain't for free @.youruser

youruser wdym you love third wheeling us

bestieuser also true

user131 oscar what is that dry ass caption 😭

user132 might as well put bwoah

user133 LITERALLY THE FIRST THING I THOUGHT

user134 WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON

user135 proud to say i've been a ynoscar truther since day 1 💪

user136 now that i know i was right all along i can die peacefully

user137 WTFFF

user138 THEY LOOK SO HAPPY AND INNOCENT AND PURE I HOPE THEY NEVER EVER BREAK UP

❤️ by oscarpiastri and youruser

user139 if they do i'm suing

user140 new comfort couple

user141 am i the only one who finds this weird? i mean we all saw that photo of her flirting with lando a week ago...

youruser if you think asking a guy for his friend's number is flirting i have bad news for you buddy

user142 QUEEN BEHAVIOR

user143 i'm picturing her walking up to lando and him being all confident and shit and then she goes "your teammate's kinda cute"

bestieuser accuracy level: 100%

lando lowest moment of my career

youruser glad i humbled you then 😚

user144 i will never unsee this now

user145 DJ LANDO REALLY GOT THEM FALLING IN LOVE

❤️ by youruser, yourbestie, oscarpiastri and lando

© 2025 l4ndoflove. all rights reserved.

[were--ralph]

why exactly do you dislike generative art so much? i know its been misused by some folks, but like, why blame a tool because it gets used by shitty people? Why not just... blame the people who are shitty? I mean this in genuinely good faith, you seem like a pretty nice guy normally, but i guess it just makes me confused how... severe? your reactions are sometimes to it. There's a lot of nuance to conversation about it, and by folks a lot smarter than I (I suggest checking out the Are We Art Yet or "AWAY" group! They've got a lot on their page about the ethical use of Image generation software by individuals, and it really helped explain some things I was confused about). I know on my end, it made me think about why I personally was so reactive about Who was allowed to make art and How/Why. Again, all this in good faith, and I'm not asking you to like, Explain yourself or anything- If you just read this and decide to delete it instead of answering, all good! I just hope maybe you'll look into *why* some people advocate for generative software as strongly as they do, and listen to what they have to say about things -🦜

if Ai genuinely generated its own content I wouldn't have as much of a problem with it, however what Ai currently does is scrape other people's art, collect it, and then build something based off of others stolen works without crediting them. It's like. stealing other peoples art, mashing it together, then saying "this is mine i can not only profit of it but i can use it to cut costs in other industries.

this is more evident by people not "making" art but instead using prompts. Its like going to McDonalds and saying "Burger. Big, Juicy, etc, etc" then instead of a worker making the burger it uses an algorithm to build a burger based off of several restaurant's recepies.

example

the left is AI art, the right is one of the artists (Lindong) who it pulled the art style from. it's literally mass producing someone's artstyle by taking their art then using an algorithm to rebuild it in any context. this is even more apparent when you see ai art also tries to recreate artists watermarks and generally blends them together making it unintelligible.

Aside from that theres a lot of other ethical problems with it including generating pretty awful content, including but not limited to cp. It also uses a lot of processing power and apparently water? I haven't caught up on the newer developements i've been depressed about it tbh

Then aside from those, studios are leaning towards Ai generation to replace having to pay people. I've seen professional voice actors complain on twitter that they haven't gotten as much work since ai voice generation started, artists are being cut down and replaced by ai art then having the remaining artists fix any errors in the ai art.

Even beyond those things are the potential for misinformation. Here's an experiment: Which of these two are ai generated?

ready?

These two are both entirely ai generated. I have no idea if they're real people, but in a few months you could ai generate a Biden sex scandal, you could generate politics in whatever situation you want, you can generate popular streamers nude, whatever. and worse yet is ai generated video is already being developed and it doesn't look bad.

I posted on this already but as of right now it only needs one clear frame of a body and it can generate motion. yeah there are issues but it's been like two years since ai development started being taken seriously and we've gotten to this point already. within another two years it'll be close to perfected. There was even tests done with tiktokers and it works. it just fucking works.

There is genuinely not one upside to ai art. at all. it's theft, it's harming peoples lives, its harming the environment, its cutting jobs back and hurting the economy, it's invading peoples privacy, its making pedophilia accessible, and more. it's a plague and there's no vaccine for it. And all because people don't want to take a year to learn anatomy.

[ambwosialive]

on gabe: ghosts, grief, and wants.

before i get started: this is all my opinion! i've been into n2n since 2010 so i've had a lot of time to think about this (thank you dunmar warehouse thank you) the thing that those who are pro-poltergeist/demon/ghost/etc gabe don't consider, i think, is that i'm alive tells us everything that we need to know.

he is not just want diana wants him to be. he's what natalie wants him to be, he's what dan wants him to be, he's even what dr. madden wants him to be.

one of the reasons why he takes the melody in superboy and the invisible girl is (aside from the absolute juiciness narratively of her brother that she's singing about overshadowing her in her own song about him overshadows her) because natalie in that moment wants to feel validated, like she's correct in assuming that gabe Is More Acknowledged Than Her and in fact Is An Asshole, which is why he's smiling and bragging so much. (in my opinion!!!)

he isn't able to be seen by dan for most of the show, because that's exactly what he wants him to be: invisible. not there. the reason why he sees him at the end (other than the acknowledgement of grief as a larger symbol and made into a tangible form) is because some part deep inside of him wants someone at that moment; diana is gone, natalie is too. he wants to feel held, so he gets held. (in my opinion!!!)

dr. madden knows him as a baby who died, which is why in make up your mind / catch me i'm falling he's cradling himself in his mother's lap, why his voice becomes more childlike. (in my opinion!!!)

the problem is we are trying to define an abstract concept in simple terms, which is just not possible. not only is gabe a symbol of grief, he very much is a hallucination of diana's, and tends to side with her for that reason. (in just another day, diana is talking about how beautiful the day is, and the only one who agrees with her is gabe- "birds are singing, things are growing", etc.)

and then, of course:

guys, that's the point.

poltergeist? ghost? hallucination? symbol of grief? abstract? that's the point. we aren't supposed to know what gabe is. it's paradoxical. "what you want me to be / your worst fear", "i'll hurt you / i'll heal you", "your wish, your dream come true / your darkest nightmare too". that's how grief is. you don't know exactly what it is. is it love without a place to go? is it anger for losing them? anger at yourself for letting them be lost? gabe can be more than one thing.

especially with theatre! every gabe is going to be different! aaron's gabe is different than jack's gabe is different than kyle dean massey's gabe is different than a community theatre somewhere's gabe! that's the point! some gabes may play him as the all american football throwing jock, some may play him as an evil poltergeist, some may play him as a whiny child who needs his mom. that's the point! the interpretation means what it means to you and how you see it! he means what he means to you! we can discuss all day long about what is the objectively correct opinion on who or what gabe is (i am guilty of this. look at the previous paragraphs), but at the end of the day…

he is what YOU want him to be.

[charmwasjess]

That One About the Temple Clones AU

Here's an underexplored and juicy plot point in the prequels that I can't stop thinking about! Because Sifo-Dyas was killed so early in the new canon timeline of the creation of the clones, with Dooku impersonating him to handle the subsequent details, we don’t even know exactly what he intended the clone army to be.

I think there’s even an argument to be made that Sifo-Dyas intended the clones to be culturally Jedi. Raised and trained in the Jedi Temple(s), learning Jedi skills and ways of life, growing up in a shared community alongside the Jedi. The clones serving not as an emergency button to hit in case of war, but as a support to the overstretched, under resourced Jedi Order in an increasingly violent, chaotic galaxy, one that might prevent the war he foresaw from ever even happening.

To begin, I’ll briefly touch on the galactic situation immediately before The Phantom Menace. Time and time again, we’re given a picture of the Jedi Order that is being stretched to its limit. All across the galaxy, Jedi temples such as the ones we see operating in the High Republic era in the Acolyte, are being shut down because the Jedi just can’t staff them. The novel The Living Force, set immediately before TPM, deals with the repercussions of these shut downs for the people living in those sectors - destabilization, a vacuum where the power hungry and corrupt can come into the space left and make life awful for the people. Problems arise, these systems go to the Republic for help, the Republic can't help due to bureaucratic red tape and lack of Jedi resources, and this creates more bad feelings about the Jedi and a great environment to grow the Separatist cause.

"I always heard so much about the Jedi. I never saw one, but they told me that was because you saved people -- and then you left!" - The Living Force

Enter Sifo-Dyas. As a member of the Jedi Council in this era, he would have overseen dozens of these painful but unavoidable closures. More, he was trained by Lene Kostana, a High Republic era Jedi, who remembered the golden age of the Jedi, all of these Jedi outposts, temples, and cultural centers being open and thriving, and surely filled her Padawan’s head with these stories. When Sifo-Dyas foresaw a coming cataclysmic war that would destroy the Jedi Order, it's not hard to see where he might have made a connection between the pervasive problem that was a lack of Jedi resources, and the galaxy falling further into darkness. In fact, it's exactly what happens in the prequels with a little push from the Sith.

The Living Force novel tells us outright that Sifo-Dyas’s original plan before deciding on the clones was to use his role as a Jedi Seeker to fill the Jedi Order with as many new Jedi as possible to counter the coming threats:

“(Sifo-Dyas) was always in a big damn hurry. Like the Republic would end if he didn’t swell the ranks.” - The Living Force 

Wow, Even Piell, that line aged like milk, buddy!

 Ki-Adi Mundi frowned. “Indeed, sometimes those he brought to us were not even viable candidates.”  - The Living Force 

So, Sifo-Dyas was originally trying to bring as many kids into the Order as possible, and didn’t particularly care if they were very Force sensitive. An intriguing detail, when considering how closely he might have imagined the non-Force-sensitive clones to work in Jedi roles.

Interestingly, he didn’t actually abandon that “swell the ranks” plan - he got his ass fired, so he couldn’t bring any more Jedi in the conventional way. Sifo-Dyas is in a desperate situation here, he feels he's running out of time, and he needs to get as many people into the Jedi Order as quickly as possible. I think you might see where I'm going with this.

“The future should remain unseen, but unfortunately, Sifo-Dyas has little choice in the matter.”  -Lene Kostana, Dooku Jedi Lost

We know he arranged the initial order for the clones, but not how he intended to use them, or saw their role, or even if he would have agreed with Jango as the DNA donor, since that part came in from Dooku.  If Sifo-Dyas, lifelong Jedi and true believer in the Order, was creating something to help defend his people in their darkest hour, it stands to reason that he might look within his own culture for their training, instead of outside of it.

Did he see them as a secret weapon, a surprise help in the hour of greatest need, as they would ultimately function as on Geonosis? Or did he envision the clones being raised with Jedi involvement on every level of their development, growing into keepers of the peace to fill those hundreds of empty temples and outposts and restabilize a galaxy sliding toward darkness?

I think an important clue that supports the latter argument is that as Sifo-Dyas is literally falling out of the sky to his death, he is busy trying to get a message to the Council that he ordered the clones via a recording: 

I've seen a vision of the future that I feel warrants an army. You've disagreed with me, but I felt I had no choice. Therefore I have ordered one: a clone army from the Kaminoans. Something must be done, and I made that decision. - Sifo-Dyas, Force Collector

He's hardly trying to keep the (currently embryonic!) clones a secret here. He seems to think he's done his part and the Council has no choice but to take it from there, and follow through with his unmentioned plan. He has delivered the needed personnel. And bear in mind, Sifo-Dyas did not expect his death to be a 10 year old mystery. He seems to have spent his very last breaths protecting Sillman and therefore leaving a witness to everything that happened. His last words are literally “Come find me!” 

These are not the actions of a man who has set his plan into perfect motion and a magic army will appear just at the right time in ten years. This is a man who is facing his unexpected death and realizing that he needs to tell the Council, who disagreed with him but he clearly still trusts, what he did because he won't be there to handle the details himself. It's almost poignant.

-

I worried about making this post at all because I’m not actually interested in blorbo apologism. Sifo-Dyas’s story is much more interesting if he is a good man forced to go to desperate, awful lengths to keep the apocalypse from happening. Whatever he intended the clones to be, it ended in Order 66; in a way, it doesn't even matter.  And yet, I think there’s something compelling there too, and I think canon gives us just enough - at least make an argument for a culturally-Jedi clone army what-if.

[alphajocklover]

Hey! My gay bestie and I got invited to a frat halloween party by some dumb straight jock and he sent us some costumes to "be more confortable in the party" but in the box he gave us theres just some caps and some shorts. Should we go? And I think this is a trick.

You’re right. You’re certain of it. This whole thing, you are your best friend being invited to a party by a bunch of stereotypical jocks, is definitely a trick. Specifically, those caps and shorts are a trick. Or they're at least a part of one. You can tell by the barely hidden mischievous grin on the face of the frat boy handing these costumes to the both of you that it’s definitely some sort of prank. Maybe itching powder or something? Still, if you or your bestie Jamie turn down the costumes, you can bet that they’ll probably do something worse. The two off you head to the bathroom, whispering to each other as you do 

“I’m not putting on this hat. Baseball caps are so tacky! Only douchebags wear backwards caps like that. Plus they probably put glue in it or something.” You said, scowling slightly as you looked at the unassuming but somehow threatening hat. Jamie giggled slightly next to you “Personally I’m not worried about the cap as much as I am about the shorts. What if they put itching powder or something in there? Or what if they’ve worn them before! So grody!” Jamie said, wincing at the thought of wearing someones used, sweaty shorts. You laughed slightly at the look on his face. Then, like lightning, a thought occurred to you. You grinned at Jamie as you explained.

“You know what? How about we see whose right. You only put on the hat, and I only put on the shorts. We know it's a prank so we might as well have some fun with it. Whoever suffers less, gets a favor from the other. Deal?” You asked. Jamie considered this for a moment, looking uncertain… before grinning 

“Okay hun. Let's do this.” He said. With the bet in place, Jamie handed you one of the pairs of shorts he had been carrying and you headed into the bathroom while he stayed outside to put on one of the caps. You felt a little embarrassed as you stripped off your pants (and shirt because the jocks had insisted every guy be shirtless), and tried not to look at your lithe body in the mirror. You slid the shorts up onto your body… and felt something like lightning shoot through your body. While, not your body. Your legs. Like magic, they began to inflate with a mix of muscle and fat. Your calves looked incredible, your thighs were thick with muscle, your cock grew to obscene proportions, thick and meaty, and best of all was your ass. It could only be described as a bubble butt. Thick and juicy and delicious. From the ass down, you were a Greek god. You’d be incredibly turned on… if you weren’t freaking out. What the heck had just happened? Was this some kind of allergic reaction? You were going to scream for help… when a dull knocking was at the door. Numbly, you opened it up… and found something shocking.

It was Jamie. Or, Jamie’s legs. From the waist down it was obvious he was the same skinny flamboyant gay guy you had gone to the party with. But from the waist up… he was exactly like one of the dumb frat boy jocks who had invited you to this party. The same beefy pecs that you almost wanted to call tits, the same huge biceps, the same thick bodybuilder neck, and the same dumb grin and dull eyes that had nothing but thoughts of muscle and sex behind them. You stuttered as you tried to take in the scene before you “J-Jamie?” You asked in shock. The dumb jock laughed dully, like you had just made a fart joke

“Nah bro, names James. J-bro if you wanna get nasty.” James said, flexing his muscles cockily. 

One of the jocks who had given you guys the costumes, Brock, approached the two of you, a happy grin on his face, that quickly evaporated as he saw what was before him 

“Oh fuck! What did you two do?!”

After a lot of freaking out and accusations – and some inappropriate groping of your ass by James – The three of you were finally able to figure out what happened. You and Jamie were right to think it was a prank, but it was much bigger than either of you had thought. The cap and shorts were supposed to turn you both into the perfect frat boy jocks who would join the frat, but because you two had mixed your clothing and split one set instead of using both, you had both been… half jocked. You got the bottom half, including a muscular ass, legs, and big feet, while Jamie got the top half, including beefy pecs, muscular arms, rippling abs, a chiseled face and a jock's brain. It quickly became apparent there wasn’t any way to turn you back, at least not one the jocks would give you, and they couldn’t transform you any further.

You definitely got the short end of the stick. While James, as he now called himself, didn’t get the leg muscles, muscular ass or the huge cock, he was able to fix most of that through hard work. Jocks love working out, so with his new personality becoming a frat boy completely was almost inevitable. The only thing he couldn’t change was the cock, and as it turns out James was never a slouch in that area to begin with. He wasn’t as big as some of the other jocks, but no one could say he was small. You, however, got the jock libido and a huge, fuckable ass, with none of the showy muscles or charm. Without the jock attitude and work ethic your leg muscles faded pretty quickly. Except for your ass. See, despite the jocks plan not having worked out as they thought it would, they did accept both of you into the frat to try and help you with your changes, and while you struggled with the leg workouts they showed you, you found you loved squats. 

So, you ended up a horny gay twink with a bubble butt and a big cock, while your best friend Jamie turned into a complete douchebag jock named James. To your surprise, you both fit in great with the frat boys now. They are not as straight as you assumed, and now you’re basically the frat cum dump. With your libido, you basically have to be, cause when you’re not being fucked you can barely think. So you’re the frats favorite fuckable twink now, at least when you’re not busy getting fucked by your boyfriend James. Turns out he didn’t change as much as you thought, and his old crush on you blossomed into a passionate relationship. No one got what they expected, and how you got to this point was a little fucked up, but when you’re being railed by J-bros thick cock as he smacks your bubble butt and kissed you lovingly, you can’t find it in yourself to care.

[p0orbaby]

I Feel Alive in the City That You Like

summary: who doesn’t like a bit of gossip?

warnings: none !

a/n: something short for our fav actress, with a little cameo from ale

word count: 1.5k

part 1

-

The bar is tucked away in a side street that smells of sea salt, diesel fumes, and hot pavement—the kind of place you only find by accident or through someone who’s “been coming here for years.” It’s called La Mala Vida, which feels pretentious in an almost charming way, like it’s trying to convince you it’s grittier than it actually is. Inside, the walls are painted a deep crimson that almost glows under dim lights. The ceiling is low enough to feel oppressive, and every table is crammed with people leaning too close, talking too loud, the air thick with cigarette smoke despite the supposed indoor ban.

Your friends are already at a corner booth when you arrive, practically shouting over the music—something vaguely Latin remixed with techno—and you spot Frances first, her sharp red lipstick and a blonde bob so precise it could have been cut with a laser. She’s dressed for drama, as always, in a vintage YSL blazer so cropped it’s practically a shrug, paired with leather trousers that look like they might have been painted on.

“We’ve been here for an hour,” she announces the moment you approach, her tone loud enough to carry over the din of the bar. “I thought you’d forgotten about us.”

“Don’t be dramatic,” you reply, pulling off your jacket—a lightweight cashmere thing that you’d brought only because the evening forecast had mentioned a breeze. You hang it over the back of the chair, careful to keep it away from what looks suspiciously like a puddle of spilled sangria.

“She thought you were avoiding us,” Georgia chimes in, already halfway through her first glass of wine. She’s dressed in an oversized white button-down that she’s knotted at the waist, paired with frayed denim shorts and silver hoop earrings big enough to be used as hula hoops. The effect is effortlessly cool, though you know for a fact she spent 45 minutes in front of a mirror before leaving her hotel room.

“I don’t avoid people I love,” you say, sliding into the seat between them.

“Except Alexia,” Frances says, her grin razor-sharp. “When she’s too far away for you to stalk”

“Frances,” you warn, though your voice lacks any real edge.

“Oh, please. Don’t pretend we haven’t all read the headlines. ‘Football Star’s Mystery Lover’—that was my personal favourite. Or was it the one about how you’ve been jetting between continents like a lovesick heiress?”

“Stop,” you groan, but Georgia is already laughing, her wine glass wobbling dangerously in her hand.

“Don’t worry,” she says. “We didn’t fly all the way to Barcelona just to interrogate you. But we will be taking the opportunity since we’re here”

“You didn’t fly here to see me at all,” you point out. “You’re here for Georgia’s ridiculous ‘self-discovery retreat’”

“It’s not ridiculous,” Georgia protests, though her tone suggests she knows exactly how ridiculous it is. “It’s wellness. I’ve been stressed”

“You live in a Soho loft and do Pilates every morning,” Frances deadpans. “What could you possibly be stressed about?”

“Life,” Georgia says, as though this explains everything.

Frances rolls her eyes, but before she can respond, the waiter arrives to take your drink order. You glance at the menu briefly before asking for a vodka lime and soda.

“Make it a double,” Frances adds for you. “She’s going to need it”

As soon as the waiter disappears, Frances leans forward, her elbows on the table, her chin resting on her hands like a particularly nosy house cat.

“So,” she says, drawing out the word. “How’s Alexia?”

“She’s fine,” you reply, keeping your tone deliberately neutral.

“Fine?” Georgia echoes, clearly unimpressed. “That’s all we get?”

“What do you want me to say?”

“I don’t know,” Frances says, her grin widening. “Something juicy. Like how she’s already convinced you to move here and start a life of domestic bliss”

“Or how she’s secretly awful in bed,” Georgia adds.

“She’s not awful in bed,” you blurt out before you can stop yourself, and both of them pounce on the admission like hungry wolves.

“Ah-ha!” Frances crows, pointing at you. “See, now we’re getting somewhere”

“Stop being so tight-lipped,” Georgia says. “You’re glowing. Look at you. That’s post-orgasm skin”

“Stop it,” you hiss, though your face is already burning.

“Don’t be shy,” Frances says, leaning back in her seat with a satisfied smirk. “We’re your friends. We’re just curious.”

“She’s curious,” Georgia corrects. “I just like making you uncomfortable”

“Why do I hang out with you?” you mutter, though the question is purely rhetorical.

“Because we’re fabulous,” Frances says.

“And because we rescheduled our chemical peel to spend time with you,” Georgia adds. “Now, come on. Give us something. What’s she like when the lights are off? Or on, we won’t judge”

“Jesus Christ,” you groan, covering your face with your hands.

“Fine,” Frances says, waving a hand dismissively. “If you don’t want to talk about that, tell us what you two do when you’re not shagging”

“Normal couple things,” you say.

“Like what?” Georgia presses.

“Like… cooking together,” you offer.

“Boring,” Frances declares.

“Or watching TV”

“Also boring”

“Taking her dog for walks?”

Frances sighs dramatically, as though your relationship is personally offending her. “You’re no fun”

“I’m plenty of fun,” you argue.

“Prove it,” Georgia says.

“How?”

“Call her,” Frances says, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “Right now”

“She’s busy,” you protest, though your hand is already hovering over your phone.

“She’s not too busy for you,” Georgia says in a sing-song voice, grinning like the devil.

Frances leans back in her seat, folding her arms. “Prove it. Call her. Right now. Or we’ll start making assumptions, and you know we don’t hold back”

“Fine,” you snap, swiping your phone off the table. “But if she gets annoyed, I’m blaming both of you”

“Blame away,” Frances replies, looking positively gleeful.

You don’t bother stepping outside for privacy—this is what they wanted, after all. The bar’s music fades to the background as you scroll for her name, your thumb hesitating for a brief moment before you press call.

She picks up on the second ring.

“Hola,” she says, her voice warm and slightly hushed, like she’s leaning in closer to the phone to hear you better.

“Hi,” you reply, already feeling the tension ease at the sound of her voice. “What are you doing?”

“Dinner with the team,” she says. “What about you?”

“Out with Frances and Georgia,” you say, shooting them a look across the table. “They’re being infuriating, as usual.”

Alexia chuckles softly, and even though the distance between you stretches across an ocean, it feels like she’s right there. “What did they do now?”

“They’re insisting I call you so they can be nosy,” you admit, ignoring the way Frances pretends to yawn theatrically beside you.

“Well, I hope I’m living up to the hype,” Alexia says, the smile evident in her tone.

Frances immediately leans forward, practically yelling into the phone. “She’s not doing you justice, Alexia! We’ve heard nothing spicy”

You slap a hand over the phone’s speaker. “Frances!”

Alexia’s laugh is louder now, melodic and unrestrained. “Is that Frances?”

“And Georgia,” you say, glaring at them both as they descend into a fit of giggles.

“Hi, Alexia!” Georgia shouts, waving as if Alexia could somehow see her through the phone. “How do you feel about long-distance frustration?”

“Ignore them,” you say, lowering your hand from the speaker, though Frances has already leaned halfway across the table.

“Alexia, quick question,” she calls into the receiver. “On a scale of one to ten, how insufferable is she as a girlfriend?”

“Frances!”

“Eleven,” Alexia replies without missing a beat, her voice warm with amusement.

Frances clutches her chest in mock offense. “A woman with taste. I approve”

Georgia’s cackling now, practically falling off her chair. “She’s funnier than you. I like her more already”

“Okay, this was a mistake,” you mutter, though you can’t help the way your lips curl into a smile.

“You’re handling it well,” Alexia teases. “And you haven’t hung up yet, so maybe you secretly enjoy it”

“Maybe I just like hearing your voice,” you counter, softer this time.

There’s a slight pause, just long enough for Frances and Georgia to exchange exaggerated ooohs like a pair of primary school children.

“I miss you,” Alexia says, the sincerity in her voice cutting through their antics.

“I miss you too,” you reply quietly, forgetting for a moment that you aren’t alone.

Frances doesn’t forget. She leans so close you can feel her breath on your shoulder. “Tell her you love her!” she stage-whispers, loud enough to draw stares from the next table over.

You shove her back, pressing a palm to your forehead. “I’m hanging up now”

“Coward,” Frances mutters, smirking.

“Goodnight,” Alexia says, and you can hear the smile in her voice.

“Goodnight,” you reply, the word carrying more weight than usual.

When you finally set your phone down, Frances and Georgia are watching you like vultures circling a carcass.

“Admit it,” Frances says, taking a triumphant sip of her drink. “You’re smitten”

“Completely pathetic,” Georgia adds.

You don’t even bother denying it. Instead, you flag the waiter down for another drink, shaking your head as they burst into fresh fits of laughter.

[aangelinakii]

picnic date w jason todd. picnic date w jason todd. strawberries, blueberries, pancakes, cherries, CHERRIES. feeding jason cherries. basically nom noms & mwah mwahs. plsplsplsplsplsplsplsplspls.

STRAWB BABY.

— share a sweet kiss in dubrovnik.

summary : how about a cute picnic with the one you love the most??

note : all these freaking holiday posts can you tell i want summer to be here BAD but anyways ik it said cherries but i had such a vivid image of chocolate covered strawberries so i hope you enjoy this regardless !!! the original title was cherry baby but i changed it to this because i realised there was a distinct lack of cherries 😭😭

croatian sun shining down, jason felt more comfortable than ever with you by his side; he didn't know anybody here, hell, he didn't even speak the language, but he wasn't worried about anybody finding you — or any annoying adopted brothers peeking from behind any trees.

not that he would admit it (although you knew) he'd rather die than have one of his family witness him feed you a chocolate-covered strawberry.

the week before now, after a good month of him complaining about work (literally beating up hooligans dealing drugs, at his own accord) you'd surprised him with the plane tickets.

jason had never been to croatia.

hell, he'd never even been to canada.

but things felt so natural here; laying on a little blanket bought from a corner shop near your air-bnb, sharing pastries fresh from the bakery, as well as fruits picked up from the green grocers on your way to the park.

jason could kiss you in the aisle of the supermarket, kiss you in the café, kiss you in the street — and he didn't worry a thing.

if they wanted to try hard enough, his brothers could probably find out where he was, for he'd told them he was going on holiday and gave them stupid answers whenever they asked. ("i'm going to the wonderful land of oz," he'd said when tim asked him, but then told duke he was going to the island where they turn into mermaids in mako mermaids.) but he was hoping with everything in him that they wouldn't.

just this once they wouldn't ruin something good for him.

a chuckle rumbled through his throat as you set down the punnet of strawberries you'd bought only ten minutes ago, juicy and ripe, on the blanket between you, and as you peeled open a croatian chocolate bar from the airport. dorina mliječna.

"so i had an idea," you began, placing the opened bar down beside the strawberries. "because we can't heat the chocolate anywhere, why don't we get the sun to do it?"

"yeah?" jason muttered from where he lay on the blanket beside you, propped up by his elbows and thick forearms. "always with the smart ideas. first, impromptu trip to croatia. now, melting chocolate in the sun... what's it for exactly?"

you sent him a fleeting look, as if it were obvious.

in this july-hot sun, the chocolate was already looking quite gooey, and so you reached into the strawberry punnet, plucked one from the group, and lowered it into the chocolate.

swirling it around in its place, you coated the end of the fruit in milky chocolate, and raised it up to your lips.

the chocolate was certainly different here than in america, and even the strawberry tasted fresher.

when you finally bit down to the green leaves, you replaced them down in the punnet with the other ripe fruits, and you were about to turn to the basket and pull out another fresh bun, but a suspiciously jason-sized hand took your jaw, pulling you back to him.

his thumb swiped gingerly at the corner of your mouth. "messy," he chuckled, pulling his hand away and bringing his thumb to his own lips. at this, his entire expression lit up in intrigue. "hey, that chocolate's really—"

"good? i know." as you spoke, you reached down for another strawberry. "try it with the fruit, it's insane."

urging yourself to pull your gaze from jason's, intense though both soft, you looked down at what you were doing, dipping the fresh strawberry in the mostly-melted chocolate bar, coating it in dribbling goodness.

when you lifted it from the bar, a long string of chocolate dripped from the strawberry, and you twisted the fruit in your finger to wrap it around the glistening red.

leaning forward, holding a hand beneath the strawberry so it didn't make any mess on the blanket, you brought the chocolate-coated strawberry up to jason's lips, where he opened up just wide enough.

his teeth sunk down on the strawberry, lips just grazing the tips of your fingers, a crunch striking the warm air.

all that was left now were the leaves, and you tossed them back into the punnet, when your eyes caught something.

smeared at the corner of his mouth.

"i'm messy?" you chuckled, looking down at him.

"yeah...?" jason responded, a nervousness that he was now the messy one growing in his stomach.

like a magnet to metal, you caught yourself leaning forward again, drowning the sounds out as people walked by with their dogs off-leash.

fingers entwining in his hair, black like a raven's, you pulled him up softly to meet your lips, the taste of that chocolate coating your tongue.

[a-hazbin-reader]

I had an alastor ask you can ignore this but what about an alastor x wife!reader where one day one of the readers old friends from their living days manifest in hell it can be angsty or fluffy but I just really wanna see how you think alastor would react to suddenly remembering that the reader had a whole different life before hell and before him

You're an amazing write and I wanna see your take on this, if not thats ok too !! Have a lovely day 🩷

Ooh this is just juicy-

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Alastor being sad, Alastor being jealous

Description: 👆⬆️

Look, Alastor is a smart man who knows you had a life before you met him, before you died

He knows this, he also had a life before you

A rather violent one towards the end there, but still...

But when one of your friends from when you were alive suddenly runs into you???? It suddenly feels like that previous life is coming to slap him in the face

"Y/N? Is that you?"

The way your face lights up with familiarity and you two rush to hug each other, obviously close

It makes him...feel something bad...

The conversation with your friend starts out simple and innocent enough, the two of you catching up with each other

You introduce your husband and Alastor can tell that your friend is surprised, probably not expecting you to be shacked up with the radio demon himself

He preens with your introduction, ready to hear your friend either gush about your amazing husband or shrink away in fear of him

Or at least that's what Alastor assumes the shocked look means

But then your friend mentions something about an old flame of yours and Alastor just kinda??? Gets a white hot flash of anxiety??

You get visibly upset at the mention of them, mumbling something to your friend that Alastor can't hear because he's not listening

You're scolding your friend for bringing up someone you hardly even thought about anymore, someone so unimportant in comparison to your husband

You had someone before him?? Someone you loved and cared about before you died and became stuck in hell?

Would you still go to them now if you had the choice? No, you wouldn't, he's one of the strongest demons in hell. Why would you leave him?

Because you loved people for more than that...

Then your friend is talking to him about your life when you were alive, telling him every stupid, funny, kind thing you did

Everything you enjoyed without him in your life

He's stuck in his own head and hurting his own feelings, the smile on his face painfully tight

"Alastor? Darling?"

Your concerned voice and gentle squeeze on his arm brings him back to reality, your friend having already left without his realizing

"Are you alright? You got quiet on me and that's not like you..."

And he's back to being his charming self, squashing down his ugly emotions

"My apologies my dear~! I just suddenly remembered I must meet Rosie today!"

He's gone before you can even question it, leaving you with a sinking feeling in your gut

The next few days after that Alastor is distant from you even though he's trying to play it off as being busy

Everyone at the hotel can see it and think that you two must be having a fight

You have to reassure them that no, mommy and daddy aren't fighting

He's been off ever since you ran into your friend and they brought up-

...your past...

Oh that stupid man of yours

It takes a lot of work to corner Alastor, he's stupidly clever and always has an excuse to avoid you

You however, did NOT become his wife by giving up easily

One time, he even straight up turned around and ran from you

And you almost fucking caught him if he hadn't cheated and melted away into the shadows

But you manage to catch him in his radio tower, using all your demonic power to sneak up on him

He jumps at the feeling of your arms draping around his neck from behind, feeling your lips on his temple

He's missed being so close to you, he really has

"We need to talk, darling one..."

This is exactly what he's been avoiding though, trying to get his uncomfortable feelings to go away so things can go back to normal between you two

"What is there to talk about, my dear~?"

He's pulling you into his lap, uncharacteristically enthusiastic about giving you affection all of a sudden, kissing up your neck and rubbing your thighs

You know he's trying to seduce you to get out of having to talk about his feelings so you stop him, placing a firm hand on his chest

"You've been avoiding me ever since we ran into my friend."

He visibly cringes at being so obviously caught, his smile strained, sharp teeth clenched tight

"I've simply been busy, I'm sorry if I've been neglecting my little wife..."

He's going in for another kiss, but you pull away with reluctance, you're attracted to your husband after all

You pull on his cheek and sigh, hugging his neck as you lean back to look at him

"Alastor, you know I hate it when you lie to me..."

Now he feels bad, he hates disappointing his wife like this...

"I suppose I have been a bit out of sorts..."

So he does his best to explain to you his uncertainty in your life, wondering if you've simply settled for him because you died

If you would choose your old life over him if ever given the chance, or leave him for a chance at heaven with people from your old life

He won't look at you the entire time he says this, leaning into you and hiding his face in your neck

Just run your fingers through his hair, maybe rub his ears a little, and listen to him vent

He doesn't like being open and vulnerable

"Oh darling, I didn't even know what love really was until I met you. Being here in hell with you has been more fulfilling than any life I had before..."

Not him making a little deer bleat before growling out of embarrassment, clutching you a little tighter

"You wouldn't-"

"Alastor, if anybody even tries to make me leave you, I'll kill them myself."

That makes him chuckle, leaning back to finally look at you

"Oh, you twisted wonderful wife~"

He's literally immediately back to himself after that, almost as though none of it ever happened

You're always surprised by how quickly your husband recovers

Maybe it's just because he trusts you so much, your words alone were enough to reassure him of his place in your world

You meant every word

When your friend comes back to visit you, Alastor actually engages with them this time

He wants to know more about who you used to be now that his confidence in his marriage has been restored

The dude is literally walking around like he got laid for the first time

Angel...shut up...

Holds you close to him the entire time, relaxed as he listens to you and your friend go on about old times

"Wait...you jumped out of a third story window? While being chased by a man with one leg?"

"And LIVED!"

SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO GET TO I HOPE YOU LIKE IT

[luvclerc]

how bout a charles leclerc x kpop idol reader? where charles and the reader have been dating even before they became famous. theyve been soft-launching each other for years and years, and the fans are trying to figure it out.

ps: i imagine jennie kim as the face claim (i love her sm)

gf reveal please

summary: when fans are manifesting a relationship they don’t know already exists

pairing: charles leclerc & reader

liked by lewishamilton and 5,928,193 others

youruser happiest girl in the worlddd

view all 34,828 comments

rubylove to the person that sends her blue flowers every year for her birthday, thank you <3

heartyn the way she’s always getting the same flowers every year 😭

petrolh lewis what are u doing here 👀

pink1 pretty sure they did a campaign together recently so nothing juicy from them

rosiesyn i just want to know who’s been gifting her flowers every year

liked by carlossainz16, landonorris, pierregasly and 2,928,019 others

charles_leclerc from the camera roll 📸

view all 26,929 comments

lecler16 ahhh not charles in his soft launch the flowers again???!-

scuder1a going to pretend i didn’t see the last slide 🫶🏻

pierregasly 😁

amorcl ???

lestapa33n what does this mean

pinkari i want to say something but i don’t want to get ratioed on here too

liked by scuderiaferrari, charles_leclerc, carlossainz16, and 4,729,019 others

youruser uk recap (ps. wasn’t exactly the results we wanted but still had a good time!)

view all 34,929 comments

pinkscuderia HELLO YN WAS AT SILVERSTONE AND THERE WAS NO PICTURES OF HER AT THE PADDOCK??!/!/

ynnniviee we were robbed of yn content at the race

char_les PLEASE TELL ME WE HAVE SOME CONTENT OF YN WITH THE DRIVERS scuderiaferrari

scuderiaferrari 🤭

sainzchar DOES THAT MEAN YESS???

scuderiaferrari see you again next race?

pinkari CHARLES IN THE LIKES??? ONE STEP CLOSER TO MY SHIP SAILING

lechairs but charles already has a gf…

liked by landonorris, youruser, and 2,292,019 others

charles_leclerc 9th. not the results we were expecting but thank you for the continuous support. next stop break.

view all 24,425 comments

itsleclerc silverstone + strategist screwed over charles this weekend but the man still has the mood to soft launch..

clmcquen shout to to charles gf for helping him through this tough time

lechairrie one day ferrari will stop fcking up charles

ynmon would have been great if yn got to celebrate a win with ferrari :(

youruser forever proud! comment has been deleted

sainzchair ENOUGH with posting the back of her head gf reveal pls

liked by youruser, carlossainz55, maxverstappen1 and 4,420,324 others

charles_leclerc always nice to spend the holidays with family ❤️

view all 34,028 comments

itslec1erc it’s been 5 holidays gf reveal when 🥹

scuderiaferrari lovely family ❤️

carlossainz55 this a big ass tree

landonorris psa! charles gf makes more money than him

charles_leclerc as she should :)

alex_albon when i borrowed $200 from her and she didn’t ask for it back 💃🏻

ynlnlover is anymore here from yn recent post?!

liked by charles_leclerc, yourbestfriend, lewishamilton and 4,593,013 others

youruser happy holidays everyone!

view all 43,505 comments

ariyn the dress... the tree... the private jet

sharleclerc waittt is this the girl from charles recent post???

landonorris oop the dots are connecting

georgerussell63 did you get me a christmas gift this year??

youruser uM haha

ynhearrt NOO MOTHER FIRST DATING RUMOR 💔

plsyn f1 driver x kpop idol is the weirdest crossover i’m sorry???

liked by carlossainz55, maxverstappen1, pierragasly, youruser and 29,210,425 others

charles_leclerc took her on a trip for our fifth anniversary ❤️

tagged: youruser

view all 98,184 comments

pierregasly damn i wanted to be the one who did the reveal 💔

youruser ilyy 💞

carlossainz55 does this mean i can finally post my pictures 😭

sharlcare STOP THIS IS SO UNEXPECTED

ynmomm THE VISUALS WNSNDNSNW

scuderiaferrari parents 🫶🏻

liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc, lewishamilton and 12,244,091 others

youruser me and my man <3

tagged: charles_leclerc

view all 80,241 comments

pinkari EVERY TONGUE THAT RISES AGAINST ME SHALL FALL

leschairs it was you and me against the world :(

charles_leclerc yn only agreed to hard launch cause she didn’t want pierre to reveal it himself 😞

pierregasly you never want to see me win :/

landonorris adopt me 🫶🏻

ynfan THE PRETTIEST COUPLE

charlyn don’t know who i want more, yn or charles 😭

carlossainz55 don’t forget about me 🥹

[gliphyartfan]

I've been thinking about this a bit and wanted to know your opinion, but every time they involve Reader and The Chain in an isekai, Reader knows the Links from video games.

But what if she/he/they knew about The Chain through The videogames, the comic and the writings it reads on Tumblr, just like we do? A Yandere content writer or consumer of said content, Reader will know how to read the signs and avoid becoming obsessed with she/he/they

Or no

Or you can choose to make them obsess over You, why go back to the stress of modern life where everyone is doing everything they can to survive? Why not just stay and pretend ignorance? Why not be pampered to the extreme and never lift a finger again? Sorry for the people who got hurt in your name, but you didn't know any of them deeply and you didn't witness the scene either, so why bother with something that doesn't affect your new life? Of course You would have to pretend to be stubborn so they don't suspect And being very good to them, but that is already returning the affection they give you, a reward for what they do for you...,all that sounds much better than worrying about working, saving, paying bills...

this is such a juicy premise, won’t lie. A self-aware Reader who knows everything about the Chain.

Like…Wild would blush furiously if they casually mentioned cooking all the stat-boosting meals he used to make.

Or Legend would probably be smug if they quoted his exploits from the games or stories or how people talk about his adventure decades after they were told.

Hyrule might be freaked out at first (like, people know of his journey??? People know about HIM???) but would eventually see it as proof Reader was meant to know them on a deeper level.

and all of them would take it as a personal challenge to live up to every expectation Reader’s have of them.

Now…let’s think about it a bit

Reader would know exactly what’s happening when they catch the boys watching them too closely, when their protective behavior ramps up, or when they subtly isolate Reader from others. They’ve read this all before, heck, Reader might’ve even written about it.

They’d immediately try to keep a safe distance, avoiding favoritism or letting them get too close. But let’s face it, The Chain isn’t going to let that happen. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

They’d be hyper away if Reader’s behavior. The second they start acting evasive, they’ll probably see it as a sign that they’re scared of something and need even more of their ‘protection.’

They might ‘accidentally’ stumble upon Reader’s escape attempts, but make it look natural enough that Reader can’t tell if they are actually aware of their attempt or if they actually stumbled upon them.

Now~ if Reader either consumed or written yandere content, then they are painfully aware of how the chain react to resistance. Every attempt to push them away just makes them cling tighter. Reader is caught in the trap of knowing too much, and that knowledge doesn’t make it any easier to escape.

In fact, Reader would probably overthink the chain’s habits and words and stuff like that (if they are an overthinker.)

Hyrule’s innocent smile, Legend’s sharp tongue, Warriors’ charming words. They ARE genuine.

But they’re also all masks, and Reader would know it. But they also know that the chain will use every trick in the book to keep them if they get a hint that Reader wants to leave.

If they ever find out Reader knew about them from games, comics, and fanfiction? Oh, it’s over. They’ll think it’s destiny, that Reader was meant to be theirs.

Like, I can genuinely see Sky say something like ‘You’ve always known us,” and he’s say it with a gentle, almost eerie smile. “You were always meant to be here.”

And everyone KNOWS if Sky makes such a decision, then they are ALL gonna be stubborn too.

And…

if Reader DECIDES to play along, well can anyone blame them?

Modern life is stressful. Bills, jobs, societal expectations, don’t even get them started on the chaos around the world.

it’s all exhausting. Reader would realize they could have a life of comfort and adoration if they just… stop fighting it.

Sure, they might have some murderous tendencies, but Reader’s read enough fanfiction to know how to keep them happy. Play along, stay on their good side, and reap the benefits of being their one and only obsession.

And if Reader is an introverted who doesn’t like being near too many people and prefers to stay home. Then even better for them! (Both Reader and the Chain)

Reader would make a conscious effort to pretend ignorance. When Wild smiles just a little too widely or Twilight’s growls seem directed at someone standing too close to them, They even feign obliviousness when they see a bit TOO much red on their clothes. (Though Reader would probably find a way for them to NOT kill anyone. Beat the hell out of? Sure no problem. Kill? eeeeh…not so much.)

Reader would reward their affection with kindness. compliments, gratitude, maybe even initiating a hug now and then. It keeps them sated, like giving treats to a pack of overprotective wolves. (Twilight is definitely doing the growly growls of happiness when Reader runs their fingers through his hair.)

Like…Reader knows they’ve probably already done a lot of terrible things in their name, but… well…Reader didn’t witness it, and it doesn’t affect their day-to-day life. It’s easy to compartmentalize when they treat them like royalty, their sole focus on keeping Reader happy.

Time would bring them tea, Warriors would ensure they’d never uncomfortable, and Sky offers you soft, soothing music. Wild hums and cooks. Why go back to stressing about rent when Reader can have this?

I mean…they’d have to pretend to be stubborn at times, just enough to keep the chain from getting suspicious. Let’s face it, if Reader is too accommodating, they might worry they’re hiding something or question why they aren’t more wary.

The trick is to keep them believing Reader is slowly being won over. Let them think their affection is working, and they’ll continue pouring their energy into doting on them rather than spiraling into paranoia.

[physalian]

10 Character Dynamics the World Needs More of

Me handing out character dynamics like free samples at the Mall Food Court: “Take one! Or two! You’ll love it!”

I don’t care how many times these tropes have been done – write more of them. Write all of them. Fill out your author bingo card one by one.

1. “No one gets to kill you but me, Old Friend”

This. Right here. Primo rival content that I *live* for. All the juicy history between two old frenemies, the character drama, the backstory, the titillating unknown of what drove these two to rival status, bitter enemies that respect the heck out of each other, to the point that hell hath no fury should one get knocked down without the other’s consent.

And, of course, the moment where it seems all bets are off, when the rival comes to save their ass only to hand it back to them at a later date. The angst! The shipping fodder! Need I say more?

2. A bigger, badder villain, and their minion

You, reader, spend countless hours hating the guts of the big bad villain. They’re evil, they’re vile, they’re sadistic, heartless, irredeemable bastards. They killed your favorite character for shock value. The big bad moustache-twirling antagonist… is actually not the biggest fish in the story.

Either they’re coerced into doing evil as a puppet of the Bigger Bad, a tragic villain in their own right, or they have some reservation, some line even they won’t cross, someone else’s boots they have to kiss, someone who features in their nightmares, as they feature in the heroes. They end their stories dispatched without a thought by the Bigger Bad, or redeem themselves in death by taking out their masters. It never gets old.

3. A leader and their lancer: besties

You know what’s better than leaders and lancers who have zero faith in each other and are constantly bickering about who should be in charge? Leaders and their right-hands who adore each other (platonically). They have each other’s backs, they know each other’s greatest strengths and weaknesses and are each other’s perfect covers.

They can communicate with looks and vague gestures alone, they compliment each other’s flaws and misgivings, build up the rest of the team when they’re down on their luck, and should misfortune strike either, they pull out all the stops and show off exactly why they’re not to be trifled with, so that even the villain is afraid.

4. “I don’t even know who you are”

Oh, but you will. This one twists the knife, robbing the avenging hero of the importance in this world they’re desperate to maintain. They are their own hero, the sun revolves around them… but not to this one asshat that ruined their life and doesn’t even remember doing it.

An entire identity built upon the finding, fighting, and overcoming of this wrongdoer, every other goal in life cast aside for this one impossibility. Either the villain toys with the hero to make them irate, or gets suckerpunched by some pissant fueled by vengeance and spite and divine purpose to dole justice where justice is due.

6. The jaded badass and their naive ward

If the last 8 years of media is anything to go by, we still love this trope, whether it’s in a galaxy far, far away or a fungi-zombie post-apocalypse, or in the twilight hours of an era of legendary mutants. The best part of this trope? You get two often contradictory character types in one body. The pessimist, PTSD-ridden master of old with no living friends left and at least one dead love interest *and* beneath all that, still lies an atrophied heart of gold just waiting to be nurtured and revived.

The naive ward gets a hard lesson in how crappy the world can be, but also in how there’s still some goodness left, if their guardian cares about them. The jaded badass in turn, learns how good the world can be, that there’s something still worth fighting for beyond the next bottom of a bottle.

6. The enemy of my enemy (is my friend)

Similar to the “old friends”, this trope is often a result of the minioned Big Bad realizing they don’t want to be evil anymore. Or, bitter old rivals, sides of a war that have been fighting for generations, ideological polar opposites, fundamental polar opposites all come together when: Some evil schmuck managed to scare them both.

Doesn’t matter on what shaky ground this temporary alliance is built, or how long it lasts, equally-competent badasses on both sides finally work together and compliment each other’s strengths, and compensate for their weaknesses, in a way their teammates never could.

7. The irredeemable villain’s only wholesome connection

Not so irredeemable anymore, now are they? This trope messes with your head, taking a character you know has done heinous acts of terror, but who cares unflinchingly, unabashedly, about one thing – either their lover, their pet, their relative, or their kid.

This exists independently of the heroes and is not the same as an “oops I guess I’m your father” reveal. I’m talking this character who everyone is convinced cares about nothing and no one but themselves and their ambition still has a place in their soul for something they want to protect, they want to be loved by, or that they must spare from their atrocities.

8. Platonic Heterosexual Friendships

These two have seen each other at their most vulnerable. They’ve shared fears, dreams, desires, know each other’s deepest, darkest secrets. They’ve seen each other exhausted, frazzled, dressed up, dressed down, bloodied and broken and like a raw, open nerve. These two would die for each other, they would live for each other, and yet.

They’re not in love with each other. They’re wholly comfortable in each other’s spaces without lust and desire mucking up the atmosphere. Neither is the one, neither wants to be the one. They remain together not for the bonds of romance, but for the bonds of friendship, and nothing could be stronger.

10. The Ace and their best friend, the Self-Proclaimed Slut

These two respect the f*ck out of each other. One never mocks the other for lacking desire and in return, they’re never mocked for their promiscuity. They’ll never walk in each other’s shoes, but they don’t need to, to understand that’s just how some people are. They’re each other’s safest spaces when the world doesn’t take either of them seriously.

They’re each other’s biggest defenders against the bullies, presumers, the holier-than-thous who think they have it all figured out. They’re the perfect compliment to give advice on everything from relationships to the best outfits for an outing because there’s *zero sexual tension* between them. Or, maybe, if the stars align, they’re something more.

10. The redeeming villain, and their staunchest skeptic

This villain has lost everything – their home, the respect of their people, their worth, their evil ambition, their identity, and has begun working their way up from rock bottom doing everything in their power to show the heroes that they’re serious. They make amends, they break their bones proving themselves, they’ve swayed everyone they’ve wronged in the hero camp.

Except one. The one character that was probably their first defender, and got burned for it. The character that was naive enough to think this villain could be saved, and was wrong. The character that won’t be duped again without some serious drama and soul-bearing between them.

Now tell me which ones I missed!

[holybibly]

I would literally read every and any story, snippet, dribble you write about wooyoung 🥺

Oh Woo, I have so many stories for him in my drafts. He still tries his best to drive me crazy. I think my next full-length work will be for him or for Woohwa.

You know, bunnies, lately I can't help but think of the feisty, filthy rich, spoiled heirs of Slytherin Woohwa.

Imagine that from your very first year at Hogwarts, they chose you as their victim, and it didn't help that you were also a Slytherin. Day after day, they tormented you, hiding your books, ruining your hair, and teasing and laughing at cute little nerd like you. As you grew older, their jibes and jokes became ruder and meaner, and more often than not, personal.

You practically stopped spending evenings in the common room because it all ended with Wooyoung hovering over you, not letting you get up, while Hwa stood next to you, playing with your hair and saying nasty things to you. I think they also laughed at the fact that no guy would want to fuck a girl like you.

Their actions and jokes started to cross all boundaries, but unfortunately, there was nothing you could do about it. Hwa has always been more aggressive, preferring to attack you openly, pressing his sensual, plump lips to your ear, be it in the middle of a corridor or a lesson, whispering the most vulgar and dirty things, and then saying something like, "It's a pity that it would never happen to such an ugly person like you.".

Wooyoung, on the other hand, is seductive and playful by nature and will always come into your room after a shower, lie on your bed in just a towel, and tease you in every way possible, maybe even playing with his dick under the towel. 

They raise the temperature of forbidden and cruel things with every word and action.

It gets to the point where you come back from class one night and find Seonghwa in your bedroom, eating some girl right on your bed. And that bastard has the nerve to invite you to watch: "You can stay; you don't bother us at all, and she's got a nice cunt, don't you think? It would be a pity if I were the only one to enjoy this view."

And imagine how quickly the tables turn when they find you in the prefects' bathroom one night. They have no idea that underneath all those shapeless robes and jumpers, you have an amazing body with gorgeous tits and a juicy, plump ass.

You will feel the change in them immediately when you see the darkness in their eyes and the dirty, lecherous grin that appears on their lips. But despite their open desire for you, if you could judge by the way their members tensed, straining the fabric of their trousers, they would blame you for that too.

"How dare you hide your beautiful body from us, little "Miss Ideal"? Don't you know that everything here belongs to us, and everything that's yours belongs to us? Including you." Seonghwa hisses angrily, and you can hear the slight hiss of Parseltongue that always comes out when he's excited or angry, and you're not quite sure which of the two suits you at the moment.

"Oh, Hwa, I think we should remind her of that. Maybe when she gets pregnant with our heirs, it will be a good reminder for her." Wooyoung remarks playfully as he loosens the tie around his neck. Even from where you are, you can see the veins in his neck tense and pulsate.

It's hard to concentrate, especially with their hungry eyes staring at your body as if they want to eat you alive, although maybe that's exactly what they want.

"What are the chances of you two leaving me alone and getting out of here?" You exhale tiredly, sinking deeper into the water.

"I think..." Woo mumbles, tossing his tie aside and starting to unbutton his white shirt.

"Zero percent," Seonghwa's silky voice suddenly rings in your ear as his hot breath brushes your skin.

"Fuck!" You jerk in fear and try to pull away, but his graceful, long fingers dig into your shoulders and hold you in place.

"That's what we're going to do, darling." Wooyoung laughs wildly, throwing his head back, and because of that, his unbuttoned shirt slides off his smooth shoulder. Seonghwa's laughter echoes in perfect harmony with Woo, and you sigh again, realising that the famous duo won't let you go so easily.

[merbear25]

Requested by @1dkneo original ask

Thank you so much for participating and sending in such a juicy request for Law 😏 Hope you like it 💜🧡

The soft hums coming from your sleeping form, the gentle rises and falls of your chest, and the subtle twitches on your resting face: you’d fallen asleep on the sofa in his office. Even with him having told you not to bother waiting up for him, you insisted on it. Now, you tempted him in your unconscious state, his mind doing laps around the agreement you and he had come to—a desire to explore new aspects of intimacy together.

CW: NSFW, MDNI, fem!reader, established relationship, sleep play, fingering, vaginal penetration, creampie

A gentle lull to sleep (Law)

“I’ve been thinking…” You knocked your knee against his to get his full attention. “We could expand our horizons a bit more in the bedroom.” Your voice trailed into his ear, swirling in his mind and asserting dominance over all other prior thoughts.

“And?” He cocked an eyebrow at you, urging you to continue.

“Well, I have this fantasy I’ve been holding onto for a while,” you teased the idea further. He didn’t respond verbally, only narrowing his eyes at you—a silent command. 

“How would you feel about experimenting with sleep play?” There was a tinge of embarrassment as the question passed your lips. Despite having been together for nearly a year now, there were aspects of your preferences that you had yet to share with him.

His stern gaze held onto you for a moment before looking away. A thoughtful expression played at it as your question sank in. “Is that something you're truly considering?” When you nodded, he asked, “Why?”

You took a minute to orchestrate how best to explain it. “It's to do with the fantasy of being ‘used’. Knowing that one cannot resist the temptation gnawing at them and ultimately giving into their urges…well, it's thrilling, really.” There was a dreamy air to you now, one which was rather intoxicating.

Listening to the desire held in your voice as each word fell from your lips tugged at his curiosity. Not having been interested in it prior, he couldn't deny the fascination it was stirring within him.

“Perhaps, it's something worth exploring if you feel that drawn to it.” Even with the apathy in his demeanor, he wasn't one to say something without it holding meaning.

There was a flutter in your heart. You leaned in to place a light kiss on his shoulder, making him stir a bit in his seat.

As the long day came to a close, your disgruntled boyfriend hid himself away in the home office to finalize the necessities for the following day. With the conversation from earlier whispering in your ear, you decided to attempt to entice Law into stepping out of his comfort zone by offering him the opportunity you hoped he couldn’t resist claiming.

Knocking on the wooden door, you waited for his hmph before entering his space. “Law? Are you coming to bed any time soon?”

He shook his head, appearing to be swamped with tasks. “No, you can go to bed without me. I’ll be at this for at least a few more hours.”

You sat down on the sofa, curling your legs underneath yourself. The silk pajama shorts and tank top covered your bare skin like a finely wrapped present, one which you were determined to coax him into unwrapping.

“I can stay with you for a little while.” Even if he wasn’t looking up at you, your voice indicated a tender smile being shown his way. “I’ve missed you. You’ve been cooped up in here most of the week.”

“I know,” he sighed while rubbing the bridge of his nose. “But I can’t exactly chitchat.”

You nodded in understanding. The reality was that you simply enjoyed being in his company. Even when it wasn’t possible to spend time together, you viewed sitting quietly in the other’s proximity to be a nice enough compromise. However, there were needs on both sides that went neglected.

The moonlight ticked across the floor, illuminating against the tall bookcase and then to the sofa where you sat. As the hours passed, you grew more and more weary. Lying down, the fabric of the sofa was more inviting than you had anticipated. As you closed your eyes, the silver glow of the outside world shined brightly on you.

At first, he didn’t notice that you had sprawled out on the furniture. His eyes glanced over at you; you appeared so fragile and vulnerable. It was then that the fantasies you confined in him came knocking.

You truly did look ravishing while you slept. Each hug of your curves that dainty fabric gave left little to the imagination. What lay beneath wasn’t anything new to him, and yet it made his heart race all the same.

The beauty of the moon painted you with its elegance. He leaned to the side to get a better look at your face, and as your lips and brow twitched from the dreams running rampant, he drummed his fingers lightly on his lap. 

“It couldn’t hurt to get a bit closer,” he convinced himself under his breath. As he kneeled down beside you, the gentle breaths coming from you made him bite his bottom lip ever so slightly from the build up. 

He ran his fingers up your thigh, the light touch sent shivers over your body but wasn’t enough to wake you. You felt so soft, so inviting. His hands moved under your shorts, taking time to explore each curve they were covering. He hummed softly and closed his eyes from the pleasure such intimacy was giving him.

When his fingertips danced further, his eyes widened and a slyness tugged at the corner of his lips—you weren’t wearing underwear. “You cheeky little thing,” he murmured. Assuming you’d planned this - to fall asleep in front of him after opening up about that wild fantasy of yours - his movements were guided more confidently. 

Being careful not to stir you awake, his hands worked lightly against your warmth. Despite being in a supposed deep slumber, the heat between your legs burned for his caress. His nimble fingers glided over your damp lips, teasing the wetness budding from between them. Your clit was grazed over, which caused your breath to become shaky. As much as he wanted to play with the sweet bundle between your folds, he feared it would lure you out of your dream. 

He dipped a tattooed finger in, and then two to stretch you out enough to adapt to his hardened length. Your arousal coated him and trickled down to the front of your shorts. You were just as gorgeous like this as you were when you were awake.

Tugging your garments to the side, his tip pressed against your entrance. The furrow of your brow forced him to refrain from going much deeper. Slowly, he thrusted into you, just enough for your slick walls to send shivers down his spine.

His huffs became more strained. You looked so sweet like this—an angel that was his to pluck from the heavens and corrupt in the brimstone pits he resided in.

The soft flesh on your ass shook gently from his waning restraint. When he reached out to grab you, a dreamy sigh escaped your lips. Your dark desire was becoming his own. The cream of your bliss coated his length, sending him into a frenzy.

He bit his lower lip in a desperate attempt to muffle his own sounds of ecstasy. His jaw slacked, his hand caressed your side, and even with his increasing want to press deeper, he held back. Your sleeping body was wrapped around him so perfectly; it drove him wild.

With a final thrust, his entire body shook. His muscles contracted as he pumped each part of himself into you, unable to hold back his choked gasps any longer. He moved his grip to the furniture, gasping as his hands white knuckled and he stopped himself from slamming his hips against yours.

Gazing down at you, your expression remained in its peaceful state. A weak smile spread on his face before pulling out. His cum beaded around your entrance and dripped down your wet slit, creating the perfect slide down to the front of your clothes.

He looked around for a moment. A groan from the stack of work he was determined to get through grumbled in his throat. Bedtime was a long ways away for him, but he could at least put you to sleep properly.

Scooping you up, he gently carried you out of the office. The way your small hand instinctively curled against his chest sent his heart soring. You were a gift, one which was beyond his understanding as to what he did to deserve you. When he placed you down and pulled the covers over you, he leaned down to plant another kiss on your temple.

After he closed the door, you rubbed your sleepy eyes and smiled to yourself because now you felt like you could finally drift off to sleep.

[cherryblossompink303]

Patience: ~Tamaki's Unwitting depression~

➼ pairing: Kyoya Ootori x Reader ➼ summary: For a group of hosts some club members are only just realising what love feels like ➼ what to expect:  "Darling I have been doing this long before we met" ➼ warnings: n/a ➼ Part Twenty one | Part Twenty three

Tamaki's Unwitting Depression!

♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡

"Peeping tom!" "You saw-" "-Didn't you Bossa Nova?"

Kasanoda is leaning against the door to support himself under shaking legs "No, I didn't see! I mean, I caught a glance, yeah, but it was all so fast that I didnt- It was just an accident I swear to you that i'm not a pervert!"

"Of course you would say that, sure sign of a guilty conscience" Honey chooses to be menacing for once.

Kasanoda finally manages to pick himself up "So then, fujioka's a girl?"

"Red alert, he's onto Haruhi's little secret" "That's not good, so let's hear it"

"How much of her maidenly terra incognita did you actually see?"

"Well she was changing so i saw her underwear"

The twins begin to freak out "You saw Haruhi's underwear?" Tamaki gasps, clearly on the verge of a crisis

"So what do we do?" "There's only one thing to do. We have to induce amnesia" Kaoru grabs Kasanoda so that Hikaru can batter up to hit him.

"That's enough you two" Kyoya steps forward, arriving slightly late along with you. "Leave assault and battery to the professionals"

"What are you made of ice? how can you be so calm about this? I bet if it was y/n you'd make a big deal"

"Look! The boss is so deep in shock, he's regressing" Hikaru points to tamaki who is practically comatose at this point.

Kyoya sighs, pushing up his glasses "Well, now that the proverbial cat is out of the bag, let's talk, Haruhi is compelled to hide the fact that she's a girl due to certain mitigating circumstances. While we can't physically force you to cooperate exactly, there is something i would like for you to bear in mind. Coming from the type of family you do I'm certain you hear all sorts of juicy little rumors, enough to know what's true and what is not. Take the Ootori family's private police force, the black onion squad, it is said that they can be mobilised against our enemies in the blink of an eye. You have heard of them right?"

Haruhi finally steps out, now dressed "Come on guys, stop scaring Casanova. Sorry about all this. Look it's alright, it doesn't matter to me you can tell whoever you want to"

"Well well bossa nova" "Since you know she's a girl, are you in love?"

Kaoru's question seems to break Tamaki sending him spiralling. You lean over to Kyoya "You're getting quite good at this now" you whisper. He smirks "Darling I have been doing this long before we met"

♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡        ♡

You had to admit that you did not expect Kasanoda to return the next day, you certainly did not expect him to waltz in, sit down and request haruhi. Even the girls started freaking out not to mention renge who rises up out the floor once again.

"The geniune article, at last"

The girls run up "Renge, is it true? is he really" "Could he rally be that kind of persuasion?"

You lean forward in your seat, taking a sip of coffee "Well this certainly is an interesting twist" You note, although Kyoya was not taking much notice, too busy filing through old Ootori hospital documents.

"Hello Kasanoda, so you're our guest today huh?" Haruhi happily wanders over with a teaset, sitting next to him. You sigh as you realise she has no clue why he's here.

"Uh, that's right"

"Would you like to have some tea? How much sugar do you usually have?"

"Let me help!"

"Now, now, you're our guest it's okay" Haruhi pours him a cup "So, tell me, is this your first time in place like this?"

"You sure have this down huh?"

"Trust me it did not come naturally at all, at least not a first but then I realised if i just sat back and had fun with it, everthing sort of fell into place on it's own"

The twins, more particularly Hikaru was growing increasingly frustrated "Hey don't just sit there Kyoys-senpai, get him out of here!" "If he's getting along with his goons so well now, why does he need to be here in the first place?"

Kyoya shrugs "He has kept Haruhi's secret so far, and as he is afterall a paying guest I can see no reason to eject him."

"But the other guests are afraid!"

You laugh "Oh no I think not, just look" You nod over to the girls fawning over the scene.

"Hello sumire? Forget about your stupid violin lesson, I'm telling you this is a one in a million chance to witness something truly amazing!"

"see? We're just fine, thanks to him, we may even set a new record" Kyoya adds. "You money grabbing enabler"

You all look back over to Haruhi and Kasanoda "Would you like another cup of tea?"

"Uh, yes, Thank you"

"Oh no she's giving him that adorable smile" "The one that no man can resist"

You raise an eyebrow "No man? Or just you two and Tamaki?" The twins gape at you.

"Wow, usually you guys wouldn't waste any time interrupting the two of them" Honey watches in awe "Yeah, but our hands are tied, after our screw up in Karuizawa Haruhi would never forgive us if we butted in" "Karuizawa was really your screw up Hikaru"

The twins turn back to Tamaki "Hey boss? Are you done being shell shocked yet?" "Yeah we could really use our king right about now" They drag him up "Go get him!" They yell, throwing him upwards.

"Tamaki-senpai?" Haruhi questions as he robot walks his way up to the two of them. "Um just what exactly are you doing?" He moves between the two of them.

"Hey if you want to sit down do it there" Haruhi moves him "You can play with this as a distraction. It's a little freebie I got at the supermarket when i went for instant coffee earlier" Tamaki fiddles with the trinket, mechanically unlooping them "Look, I solved it haruhi"

"wow that was fast, okay, now try and see if you can put them back together" Tamaki fiddles more

"That moron" Hikaru rolls his eyes, pulling out his phone to call him "Earth to boss! Will you snap out of it already? The longer you sit there like an idiot playing robot, the worse this situation becomes for all of us! Now listen to me carefully, you can't let this happen, if she and that two-bit thug hit it off, she'll become a mob wife!" This seems to break Tamaki out of his trance.

Tamaki slams his hands against the coffee table to stand. "Daddy won't stand for that!"

"Uhh please don't do this"

"Bossa nova! Just what are you trying to do here? You established a bond with your henchmen didn't you? Why aren't you with them right now? what about kick the can? You remember that? You should be out there enjoying life to the fullest with your friends, while you're still young enough to appreciate it, before it all slips away from under your nose! Whya re you harrasing my Haruhi! As her father, I forbid you to see her!"

"Wait what?"

You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose, this is going to end in tears.

"You're telling me that you're Fujioka's dad? You have got to be kidding me. That's just impossible"

"Oh no"

"Well, we might not be related by blood "

"Okay so what, are you married to her mom then?"

"No, i've actually never met the woman"

"So i guess you aren't really her father then, are you?"

You and kyoya brace yourselves for tamaki to break at any moment. which he does.

"Wah! Tama-chan! I'll catch you" Honey runs up. "He's right you know? strictly speaking, i'm not Haruhi's real father"

"uh, strictly speaking or otherwise"

"I need to sort this out"

"Sort out what exactly?"

"If supposeing I'm not my haruhi's daddy after all..."

"We don't have to suppose it boss"

"Then how can it be that I find her so utterly adorable?" Oh this is worse than you thought "What are you talking about?"

"When she is with another man why is it that I become so insanely jealous, i'm not her father, i have no right to be so protective" Oh this is so bad, he really had no idea.

"So tell me what is with the whole 'making haruhi your wife one day' thing?"

"I know! Daddies don't typically want to marry their little girls when they grow up do they? "

"What about keeping her from kissing anyone?"

"I only wanted to preserve those precious lips"

"Preserve? really? That's a very interesting choice of word sir, you think everything is okay now, and having this family setting will keep it all from changing right?"

"I don't understand"

"Actually he has a point" Kyoya speaks up from next to you "I mean you're delusional, yes, any halfwit could see that but who knew you were so..." You roll your eyes, crouching down in front of Tamaki

"Tamaki, sweetie, have you considered that maybe that you think of haruhi as something other than a daughter and are trying to bury it under something less scary to admit?" Tamaki stares back at you with a blank face.

"In some ways Tamaki is kinda like my dad" Haruhi says to Kasanoda, which seems to reset Tamaki who chuckles "Did you hear that? apparently in some ways I am like haruhi's father"

"Well, to be more precise, I think what she's saying is, that while you and her father do share some personality straits, in actuality-"

"I've got it! I've got it now! I'm like a father to her!"

You sigh, placing your forehead against your knees "Well, I tried"

"And we've lost him yet again"

"Fujioka, do you think that we could maybe do this more often? Because I was thinking since you entertain girls all day long it might kind of give you a break from all that, you know, if i came around. I mean if, if you want that is"

"Absolutely, that way, you and I could get more acquainted"

Tamaki gasps, the girls hold their breaths.

"Fujioka, i, i've got something i want to tell you. I just wanted to tell you....that i'm...."

"That you're excited to have someone you can relate to, aren't you?"

"Oh Haruhi you sweet summer child" You mutter.

"i know I sure am" She stands "A conversation like this is a rare thing for me, we're going to be great friends"

The girls murmur in pity of kasanoda, fawning over him.

"Of course the two of us are going to be friends! Best of friends forever!"

The girls well up in heartbreak for him, piling around him. leaving Tamaki on his knees with you still crouched down in concern next to him "What's the matter Tamaki?" Kyoya also crouches down next to you, looking at him like two concerned parents look at a toddler.

"When I think about how bossa nova must have been feeling my heart goes out to him a little"

"that's strange isn't it? I mean as haruhi's father, you shouldn't feel sympathy for the man who tried to take your precious little girl away now should you?" you nudge him "Not helping"

"On the contrary, i think it is"

Next time on patience 'And so Kyoya met her!'

Tag list (reply to be added): @skottch @cgmajor @rebirthbunbun @bbybubbles @blueberry19000 @katgirl05 @smellslikelovinglies @veras-fanfic-reblogs @sadprimrose @mirtalikesdr @sleeplesssskeleton @ritzes28 @crackpeole @rory-cakes @renjunniex @II-kita-san-II @angelicwillows @missbrebre1012 @sleep-7372 @strawberrbitch @reticent-writer @eternal-dokja @meme848 @mistyhydrangeagarden @nanaloverz @hyuninslutbbgirl @rebel-author-chick @voyager1fan @bubbabobabubbles @haowonbins