#i know everyone like to compare Anakin to this image but I thought of her when making edits last week | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

loth-wolffe · 3 years ago

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Make a Wish

Pairings: none. a lil bit of captain rex x reader if you squint.

Summary: the torrent company prepares something for your birthday<3

Word count: 1,4k not proofread

A/n: So!!! i know I've been dead for the past week, but today's my sweetiepie ana @leia-saveourskins birthday!!!! and she asked me to write a little something for her so I came back from hell bc i can't really say no to mi bb ana. congrats bubs!! i hope you have the most amazing day today and always. hope you like this heheh<3 tqm mucho. mwah mwah mwah

Rex had called you to the hangar, something about Anakin needing some help with something, his words rushed as if he didn't have time and you felt confused, it wasn't like there weren't any more mechanics working at the time, and the General had given you half day off, "as a birthday present," he had told you, after a little hug and a congratulations.

You rushed your steps, hair still slightly wet from the shower you took before and the thought of getting more engine oil on you made you roll your eyes.

This better be good.

Once you got to the hangar door, you found it was closed, frowning, you commed Rex.

"The door is closed."

You hear him coughing, a few murmurs are heard and you never felt more confused in your life, what was going on.

"Yeah, sorry." He mumbled, "Ahsoka locked it by, uh, accident." Rex sounded nervous, and for some reason it made your heart beat faster. Did something happen? If it required for the General, Commander and Captain to be in the room, it must be important, but then again, there's no power in this galaxy that could ever torn them apart.

"Its open now."

It's not long before the door opens before you, and as soon as you step into the room, a chant of "surprise!" is heard, keeping you in place as your brain processes the image before you, tears filling your eyes as soon as it settles in your heart.

Everyone is there, your fellow mechanics, Anakin, Ahsoka, the troopers you had become friends with, even the General of the 212th was there, with big smiles on their faces, a big sign with messy letters in aurebesh that read Happy Birthday colored with the 501st blue hung between two ships, it was almost falling off, but the thought warmed your soul. The "ay" looked incredibly smaller as they run out of space compared to the wide H at the beginning, they all had different styles, and you wondered if they agreed to write one letter per person.

"I–" you started, but words didn't come out, you were left speechless, many emotions running through your mind and your heart that you couldn't pick one to express what you felt.

"Thank you," you whisper, blinking quickly in hopes for the tears to disappear, but they don't, much less when Ahsoka comes for you and holds your hand, leading you towards everyone.

"Ah! it's nothing, the boys insisted we should celebrate." She told you, the mischievous smile she wore told you she was to blame.

"The boys? Snips you couldn't shut up about the surprise party for a week." Anakin said, walking towards you before enveloping in a warm hug, one that lasted longer than the one he gave you a few hours prior. "Happy birthday," he murmured softly in your ear, and you smiled widely.

Anakin hasn't been nothing but nice since you joined the Resolute, times spent at the hangar fixing whatever ship he completely destroyed in his perfect landings, and you were completely past knowing him solely as The General and more as Anakin.

"Thanks, boss."

He chuckled, ruffling your hair before Ahsoka pushed him away.

"Hey, we all want our hugs gramps," she said as she gave you the tightest of hugs, laughing quietly when you hear Anakin huff in annoyance. "Hope we have you many many more years with us."

It took you a while, to be congratulated by everyone, Obi Wan being the first right after Ahsoka, Rex lingering a bit more than most, his cheeks a sweet shade of pink as he stumbles over his words.

"I uh," he scratches the nape of his neck, aware of the line of clones behind him waiting to hug you, "I, I know this isn't much but," his eyes look down to his feet before meeting your eyes, golden eyes filled with nothing but affection, his fingers fumble awkwardly with his belt as he tries to take something from one of the many bags. "I got you this."

He gives you a little bouquet of flowers of your favorite color, already placed in a cup with water to keep them from dying.

"Rex you–" for the second time in the past hour, tears fill your eyes, a lump in your throat makes it hard for the words to be pushed past your lips, "you didn't have to."

"I wanted to." He frowns slightly, looking at the little box in your hands, "like i said, it's not much, but–"

"It's perfect, thank you."

You kiss his cheek, feeling like melting from all the love you're receiving, but mostly because how even now, in the middle of war, between so much death and suffering, they still find a moment to celebrate life, to still be kind, to be thoughtful and caring.

The tips of his ears turn red, and you giggle softly before thanking him again, he nods as he moves for the next person to give you his best wishes, a few give you little kisses on your cheeks, and others give you stiff hugs that made you chuckle.

Jesse is the last one to hug you, along with Hardcase and Fives.

"Happy birthday to not only the best mechanic in the GAR, but to our best friend as well." Jesse says before giving you a bone crushing hug, a loud, breathless laugh leaving your lips as he leaves a very wet kiss on your cheek.

Hardcase doesn't wait for Jesse to leave before he's hugging you too.

"Happy birthday!"

And it's not long before you have all the boys crushing you in the biggest bear hug you've ever had, feeling a bit claustrophobic for a moment but that doesn't stop you from enjoying the moment, your heart swelling with love.

When they all pull away to let you breath, Fives places a hand over your shoulders, walking you towards the Generals and the Commander waited for you.

"We got another surprise for you!"

"Oh really?" You ask, looking at Echo when he places himself on your other side, throwing his arm over your shoulders as well and walking in sync with you and Fives.

"Fives really insisted on it."

You hum, confused once more, but as soon as you meet with the others, you find what they were talking about.

There's a big cake being held by two astromechs, the white frosting perfectly placed under the blue letters that held your name right on the middle, sprinkles of at least eight different colors, one of the corners had way too much yellow and there was a tiny smiley face on another.

"There's no birthday if there's no cake." Fives stated, and everyone agreed.

"We made it, so we're not completely sure if it's good," Tup sheepishly admitted, and you almost melted at the thought.

They were too sweet, incredibly so that your heart couldn't take it.

"Thank you guys, I'm sure it's amazing."

"Oh! you cannot cut it without blowing the candle," Obi Wan spoke, patting his clothes trying to find the candle Anakin made sure he didn't forget.

He placed it on the when he found it, giving you a dashing smile and a wink once he did. R2 was quick to lit it up.

The boys made sure to be loud when singing the happy birthday song, Hardcase and Jesse making their voices as low and loud as they could, making Dogma roll his eyes and Fives laugh for most of the song.

Tears left your eyes a few times, overwhelmed with the affection they all had for you, your cheeks hurting with how wide you were smiling.

"What did you wish for?" Fives asked you at some point, to which you shook your head as you took another bite of cake that –to everyone's surprise,– it was actually good.

"Can't tell you."

"Why not?"

"Some say that if you say your wish, it won't happen." He scoffs.

"Sounds like bullshit." You laugh loudly, which makes Fives' face break into a smile.

You don't tell him, though, that you didn't wish for anything. Not really, for everything you wanted was right there, with you, the feeling of home, of warmth. Knowing you belonged somewhere, in a family you found all by yourself, surrounded with joy, and love.

They made sure it was your best birthday ever.

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nanagoswife · 4 years ago

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I Failed Everyone. I Failed You.

(^^these are related to the fic^^)

HAPPY MAY 4TH EVERYONE

In celebration, I decided to write this random idea I had literally just last night (right before I wrote it. I wasn't even planning to write last night 😅) Anyways, I thought we could use some Obi, even if he isn't going through entirely good times. With me, I had to end it on a lighter note so sad Obi doesn't necessarily last the whole time.

Pushing this aside, happy May 4th everyone.

May the force be with you, always.

- - -

Summary: After Order 66, Obi-Wan has to go and deal with Anakin. Taking place after the duel, he comes to you for support but, as the next hours go on, you're the one needing comfort.

W/C: 2.2k

Warnings: Mention of flame boy, mention of mass death, character death, angst, Obi being a sad boy

The threatening shades of red and orange accented by the black, soot covered ground would’ve frightened him in any other situation. Even the locals had an unwelcoming presence as they floated over the molten lava, gathering Maker knows what.

Now, though, he was more focused on a different fear that had come true. The order was destroyed, his friends turned on him, he failed Anakin. Obi-Wan Kenobi had failed one of the people he strove to do only good for.

Instead of his true duty, he had just battled his closest friend. His brother. His son. The one other he cared and watched over not because his master had told him so, but because he felt inclined to. There had been something in Anakin that peaked something inside of him that drew him to Anakin.

What good was he if he failed everyone he ever loved? First, Qui-Gon, then so many others. Even people who had just been there that fought by his side or died to save him. Then there was this current moment. He had failed to see how the war was a fool’s game. The person leading it was really on the enemy side and let his true colours show in a drastic change.

Obi-Wan had failed. He had even failed you. Compared to you, Obi-wan knew so much more about what was truly going on. Had he seen how overly fond the Chancellor was for Anakin, even you were suspicious. Yet, he didn’t act on it soon enough.

Due to this, you were caught up in Anakin’s tirade before it turned into the battle he had endured. You had come with Obi-Wan hoping that you could talk him back. Anakin always did have a strong connection with you. He had told Obi-Wan at a point that he looked to you as a mother figure, a role model.

It almost worked, too. It was almost as if something snapped in Anakin as you tried to step closer. All you wanted to do was embrace him and tell him how it would all be okay even after what happened with Padmé moments before. That’s not how he saw it. So, he had used the force and threw you against the ship, rendering you unconscious.

Being protective of both you and Padmé, Obi-Wan tried a last ditch effort to try and talk Anakin down. Despite being known as the ‘Negotiator’, his negotiating skills greatly lacked compared to yours. He had failed your mission to bring him back to the light.

With everything, it led to him watching as he was burned alive, almost pleading for help. Instead of listening, he turned away, unable to watch.

The image was sure to haunt the rest of his days as he walked back to the platform with Anakin’s lightsaber. Before this had all happened, he was able to check to make sure both you and Padmé were still alive. Thank the stars that you both were. He could only hope the baby was alright.

When it came to you, he was relieved to know that the one person he loved most dearly was alright, considering. You would’ve been the last straw had Anakin killed you.

Even in this time of pain and grief, he couldn’t help but be amused at the thought of how, not only did Anakin see both you and him as parental figures, but the two of you had really been together the whole time. Whether Anakin knew or not, the two of you raised him like your own because both of you knew that you couldn’t actually have a child of your own. So, Anakin played that role.

That was why you were so adamant on trying to talk him out of it. Unlike Obi-Wan, you refused to raise a hand to Anakin. Obi-Wan wouldn’t have either, had he not almost killed you and his own wife who carried his child. It repulsed him.

As he neared the platform, fear filled him at thinking something may have happened while he was gone. Did clone troopers arrive and find you here? He didn’t want to think about it, partially because, at this point, he would just give himself up to it.

Stepping up the platform, intense relief overtook him when he saw you with your back turned to him. You only turned when both R2-D2 and C-3PO had greeted him.

He didn’t need to say a word for you to know what happened. Why else would he be carrying the lightsaber? Although you hated that it happened, you couldn’t blame Obi-Wan at all. His pained expression showed how heavily it weighed on him.

Obi-Wan didn’t stop when the droids met him. Instead, he kept his path to you until he was in your arms. The tears that he had just wiped away now mixed with the ash on his face once again as he buried himself into your neck. One of your hands easily held the back of his head while the other gently rubbed his back.

As you held him, your own tears filled your eyes. You were unable to bring Anakin back. You had lost the closest thing you had to a son to the dark.

“I’m so sorry,” Obi-Wan said, barely coherent through his cries. “I-I failed him. I failed you.” Just his voice wrenched your heart as his pain was so prominent.

His words pained you in a way that they never have before. In your mind, he didn’t fail you or Anakin. You were just as much to blame. As was everything else in and around your lives. That wasn’t what he needed to hear, though.

“Shh, it’s alright,” you said quietly into his ear. To further comfort him, you traced delicate circles in his hair. “You didn’t fail me and you definitely didn’t fail Anakin. There’s no way we could’ve known that this is what was going to happen.”

“But-”

You cut him off, “No,” you said firmly but stayed soft so you could comfort him further. “You taught him well. The rest were his decisions. We couldn’t force his path, Obi.”

Carefully, you moved his head so that you could look him in the eyes, cupping his cheeks with your hands. The usual soft, caring blue was now dimmed with pain and grief. Although that’s how you felt, you tried to remain strong on the outside. He didn’t need how you felt added to his own emotions.

“Come on,” you said gently, “Padmé is inside. We need to get her into medical care.”

Slowly, Obi-Wan nodded and you led him inside by the hand that didn’t carry the lightsaber. When you walked in, you left Obi-Wan by Padmé’s side as you went to pilot the ship off this dreary planet.

“Twins?” you exclaimed when you heard the news. You, Yoda, and Obi-Wan all glanced at the other when the medical droid told you this.

“Go. By Senator Amidala’s side, you should be,” Yoda told you when you had looked worriedly at your friend. The fact that she was dying hadn’t quite settled in just yet. Instead of voicing this, you nodded to Master Yoda and quickly made your way to Padmé’s side.

Out of pure instinct, you grabbed her hand.

“Y/N,” she said weakly.

“Shh, save your strength. You’re about to have a couple little ones making themselves known,” you said with a slight chuckle, hoping to lighten the mood. To your relief, she let out her own laugh.

The rest of it was all a blur. Padmé’s tight grip on your hand was merely a reminder that you were still here. It was a reminder that these may be the last few moments you get to spend with her.

At a point, you had looked up to where Obi-Wan was watching from the other side of the glass. Trying to be brave, he offered a small smile in comfort. It did help a bit before your attention was drug back to the situation as the grip on your hand was tightened.

Once both Luke and Leia were born, Obi-Wan joined the room and held Luke as you held Leia.

When you looked down, Padmé was smiling at the two babies that the two of you held. Then it fell. “There’s good in him,” she whispered, breathing deeply. “I know… I know there’s… still…” and she faded.

Obi-Wan looked as desolate as you felt. Other than the two of you, there was no one else. Sure, there was Yoda, but relationships with him weren’t as deep as with everyone you’ve lost today. Now, you and Obi-Wan were left with the children of your closest friends.

Later, after your discussion with Yoda and Bail Organa about what would happen with the children, you were watching the twins in the nursery through the glass wall. So many thoughts were running through your mind, the most prominent being what would happen with you and Obi-Wan.

During the meeting, the relationship you had with Obi-Wan no longer needed to be hidden. Even though Yoda already had known for years, he was open to what the two of you had to say. This was all to lead up to the point that the two of you would take Luke to his family on Tatooine and, together, you would watch from a distance.

Your thoughts now were about how the two of you would stay hidden with this duty. You thought about how this all would affect the next days, months, stars, maybe years. Would this plague both of you for the rest of your days? Would this draw you apart? Would it bring the two of you closer? Would you finally start the family the two of you wanted?

“Darling?” Your racing mind was interrupted as you heard the familiar voice. Turning to it, you saw Obi-Wan’s worried gaze. This time, it wasn’t because of everything else that had happened. It was a worry for you. “Are you alright?”

“Yes, quite…” you trailed off as you looked back to the two newborns.

Seeing your gaze, he immediately knew what you were probably thinking. He stepped up to you and pulled you into his embrace as he placed a kiss to the top of your head. What you needed was comfort, and that’s exactly what he was going to do.

“Don’t worry, Darling. This won’t pull us apart, I promise,” he said reassuringly.

As he held you, an idea popped up in his head. It was something he continually thought about, but never was able to do. There was so much that he could finally act on that was once held back due to the code. Now, he could tell you and ask you everything he wanted to for so many years. Especially with this idea now.

“Y/N, darling?” He moved slightly back so that he could look into your eyes. The troubled look that he saw in your eyes earlier was now dimmed down and was replaced with the usual fondness he loved to see. “To prove this, I want to ask you something.”

Confusion suddenly took you over. What could he ask that would prove to you that nothing would happen? That is until he started to sink downwards. He kept going until he was kneeling, looking up at you and held one of your hands in his. The whole time, he didn’t remove his eyes from yours.

“This has been something that I’ve wanted to ask for so long. I haven’t been able to before, but now I can. Y/N, will you marry me?”

Overwhelming happiness threw every thought from everything from the last twenty-four standard hours. It was the first time you truly smiled for days, maybe even weeks. It rendered you speechless as this was a day you thought you’d never get. Eagerly, you nodded your head before pulling him up to kiss him. The first time you would share a kiss without the fear of others catching you.

“I love you, Obi. So much,” you said, resting your forehead against his.

“I love you too.” Obi-Wan lifted a hand to your cheek and traced small circles with his thumb. Although the reasons that made this moment possible were horrible, he basked in this small thing that helped both of you forget. This was well needed for now. “Maybe we could finally start the family we’ve always fantasized about,” he said while bringing his lips to your forehead.

You pulled your head away, but didn’t move away from his hold. “Really?”

“Really. Those dreams can finally be a reality.”

Without any more hesitation, you kissed him once again. There will be much to overcome, but you’ll have each other to work through it. You’ll have the other to comfort the other. Eventually, you’ll have another that will make you want to be better.

Then, you knew that Obi-Wan hadn’t failed you and you hadn’t failed Obi-Wan. Even though you both lost your closest friends, and you may have failed so many, you hadn’t failed each other. And in this blissful moment, that’s all that matters.

@stardancerluv @where-fantasy-meets-reality @jaydenwoo @madmax2003 @hopeladybug

If you want to join a taglist, message me or send in an ask. I'll eventually get something set up, but this is the only couple ways for now 😅

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jasontoddiefor · 4 years ago

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Chapter 7 of As Lightning to the Children eased or as I like to call it: Dooku gets his shit together.

Dooku didn't know how, but Shmi Skywalker had known that something had happened to her child before the call of the Council had even reached them. She had looked up in the middle of her katas, paling rapidly. Dooku had heard of Masters sensing their Padawans' distress before, had experienced such with his own reckless students, but never with such intensity and days' travel in hyperspace away from his children. Still, Shmi continued with her tasks with the same dedication as before her foreboding and did not panic when they got the actual notification two weeks later, telling them that Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and Qui-Gon Jinn were already back on Coruscant, apparently all in a miserable condition.

Padawan Skywalker the elder's stance on the whole situation caused Dooku to reconsider his rude behavior during their first meeting. She had known that something was terribly wrong, had felt it deep in her bones when no one else had, and yet she had endured, done her Master proud, and fulfilled their mission first. When they arrived back at the temple, a place Dooku had been away from for too long as he had forgotten the warmth of its embrace, she dutifully made her report to the Council, under the many concerned eyes of the assembled Masters. And only when she had finished her statement, answered all questions, she excused herself and left to visit her son.

If anyone still doubted her place in their order after these actions, Dooku wouldn't hesitate to challenge them himself for her honor, though given her quick wit and skill with the blade, she'd hardly need anyone to fight her battles.

Shmi didn't ask him if he wanted to come with her, but she also didn't stop him when he fell into step with her. She smiled at him, kindly as if she were his Crèchemaster, ready to console him, and not a Padawan as they silently walked to the halls of healing.

Dooku hadn't been there when the Skywalkers had joined the temple, but he had heard of the impossible terror that was Shmi's child.

Yet, somehow, all those rumors couldn't compare to meeting him in person. He looked innocent and human enough, sleeping in his Master's arms, a small togruta child stretched across the both of them. Then, suddenly, he woke and within the blink of an eye, Dooku found himself pinned against a wall, electric blue eyes focused on him with previously unknown intensity.

"Anakin!" Obi-Wan was awake a second later, holding down his student's arm as if that could lessen the pressure on Dooku's chest. "Anakin, stop it, we're home, it's alright."

Disorientated, the child blinked at Dooku, curiosity and confusion entering his gaze as if he were seeing Dooku for the first time. Then whatever might have kept him in a chokehold, stopped and the boy fell back into his Master's arms.

"Obi-Wan?" Anakin sounded puzzled when he spoke up. His voice was rough as if he hadn't spoken in days.

"Hello, Anakin." Though Dooku knew that his grandpadawan was hardly older than twenty-five, the exhaustion wearing him down made him look decades older. "Are you awake now?"

Anakin tilted his head. "Yeah, of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

A shadow passed over Obi-Wan's face. "No reason. Do you know who is visiting us?"

More hastily than before, Anakin's head whipped around and turned into the direction Shmi was standing in. "Mom!" he exclaimed and, after carefully pushing the third child off his lap, he jumped out of bed to rush to his mother. He hugged her tightly, burying his face in her robes. "Mom, I missed you."

Shmi Skywalker, showing no sign of fear, worry, confusion or anything such as that about her son's earlier actions, only embraced him just as tightly.

"I missed you too, Anakin," Shmi said and kissed the top of his head.

Anakin didn't let go of her, but his eyes drifted to the lightsaber clipped to her belt. Without another word, Shmi took it from the belt and handed Anakin the blade. Anakin examined it closely, ran his fingers across the metal hilt before handing it back to his mother. "Your crystals sound nice. I like them."

"I'm glad."

As mother and son continued talking, Dooku managed to get to his feet, still shaken by the assault the others pointedly ignored. He crossed the distance to the bed Obi-Wan and the now yawning youngling were lying on and sat down on it. He disliked showing such weakness, but he couldn't exclude the possibility that his legs might not hold him upright should he continue to stand.

"What was that?" he asked.

Obi-Wan sighed and the youngling whose presence Dooku could not quite explain sat up and gently patted his cheeks, making the young man smile.

"It's a reflex, mostly," Obi-Wan explained. "Anakin isn't quite over what happened yet and lashes out when he thinks we are threatened by something or someone he doesn't recognize."

Obi-Wan's elaboration failed to clear anything up and if the boy didn't look like he hadn't slept in a week, Dooku would claim he was purposefully misdirecting. "We are in the Jedi temple. What is there here that he fears?"

What had Dooku done that Anakin assumed his own lineage would attack him?

The look Obi-Wan was giving him was downright chilling, damning, before it slowly turned into incredulity. "I thought that was why Shmi— You don't sense it, do you?"

He sounded flabbergasted.

"No," Dooku said. "What is there to sense?"

Discomfort and wariness settled in the air, so heavy that Dooku was reminded of the invisible hands around his neck.

"The taint, the poison, the rot clinging to your light," Obi-Wan said slowly. "The darkness."

It sounded like judgement.

The first thing Qui-Gon recognized was noise.

It was loud around him, familiar voices speaking out. When he tried to open his eyes, he found the task impossibly challenging. He fought against the voice telling him to rest a little longer, that he didn't have to wake quite yet, but Qui-Gon had always been a stubborn one, unwilling to follow orders he deemed unnecessary.

"Master!"

When light began to fill his vision, Qui-Gon looked into the face of his worried Padawan, missing his braid and looking as distraught as Qui-Gon had seldom seen him before.

"Obi-Wan?" he tried to say, but his voice wasn't cooperating, so whatever left his mouth, it couldn't have been his apprentice's name.

"It's me, Master, yes." Obi-Wan understood him anyway, clever and wise as he was. Qui-Gon had given his Padawan a much too difficult time when he had still been his student and not a Knight of his own regard. He could hardly imagine being any prouder of Obi-Wan than he already was

"Master Qui-Gon!"

His vision became clearer and allowed for him to see Anakin and Ahsoka sitting just beside him on the bed, Shmi behind them and there, right next to her—

"Master."

"Save your strength, Qui-Gon," his Master urged him. If Obi-Wan had looked distressed, Dooku appeared downright hysterical. Qui-Gon was quite ready to believe this was all a hallucination now. As far as he knew, his Master had sworn off returning to the temple for at least another decade and even if he were here, he certainly wouldn't seek out Qui-Gon, no matter how injured.

"Rest some more," the imitation of his Master said. For just the shortest of moments, Qui-Gon was reminded of the time he had been a youngling just a few months older than Anakin and Dooku, not even quite Obi-Wan's age then, had panicked over his sickness. It had only been a mild cold, not the blinding hot pain chaining him to the bed now, but Dooku had told him to rest then with just the same cadence and care.

"Everything will be better after you've slept."

The illusion said the same words as his Master had then and just for that alone, Qui-Gon was inclined to believe him, even if he couldn't sense him, sense any of them properly.

Qui-Gon didn't know how much time passed between the intervals he was actually closer to consciousness and those he was inaccessible to the world. It felt like centuries passed within the blink of an eye. Regardless, whenever he woke, Dooku was there, dutifully sitting at his side as if Qui-Gon were still a child. It was reassuring anyhow.

The morning Qui-Gon woke and didn't feel like he needed to drop right back to sleep, he was greeted by the image of Dooku reading while the children were playing some board games on the bed next to his.

Qui-Gon decided to observe them just a minute longer before he spoke up.

"Am I dreaming, Master?"

Dooku immediately dropped the datapad and the others stopped their game, Qui-Gon's voice breaking this strange atmosphere.

"Qui-Gon!" it came from all sides. "Are you alright?"

He felt half-blind as if he had lost a sense he had always taken for granted, but, staring into the guilt-ridden expression of Anakin, he realized that lying had never been easier. "Yes, of course. What did I miss?"

From the look his lineage was giving him, quite a lot.

Ahsoka was young, but she wasn't stupid.

"What happened?" she asked Obi-Wan. The real adults wouldn't tell her anything for sure, but Obi-Wan just might because he was Anakin's the same way she was Anakin's, and he was theirs, and that was all that mattered. "Anakin is different."

He was hurting, though he tried to hide it. His pain and his fear scared him, which in turn only upset Ahsoka. She wanted everyone to be happy and healthy, but the world had shifted when she hadn't been there and it hurt.

"I—" Obi-Wan hesitated, so Ahsoka crossed her arms in front of her chest like she had seen Shmi do when she wanted to know something and nobody was willing to tell her. It made Ahsoka feel taller and more grown-up. Obi-Wan would have to tell her the truth.

"I want to know," she repeated. "Now."

Obi-Wan studied her for a few moments longer, then he sighed. "Anakin did something very foolish and difficult and Qui-Gon did something just as stupid and now everything is a mess."

Ahsoka could tell that he was trying not to use big words with her, but it only felt like he was attempting to get away with saying less.

"What did they do?" Ahsoka asked. "I want to know."

The need was pulsating under her skin, edging her on, licking at her arms like hot flames, urging to demand and not stop until she had forced the truth from his mouth, the ugly thing that was closing his throat.

"Anakin saw something really, really bad and dark," Obi-Wan said. "So Qui-Gon helped him forget that."

"But isn't that good?"

Ahsoka thought it was. It should be. If Qui-Gon took away what had hurt Anakin, then Anakin was going to be better now. That was how helping others worked. The others always said so; Shmi did too. The more you helped, the more did the galaxy heal.

"Yes, technically speaking, but… You know how the Force gives us warnings?"

Yes, of course, she did. Everyone always said to listen to the Force for their knowledge, but the Force had never warned her before she had stubbed her toe, so she wasn't entirely sold on that yet.

"The memories Qui-Gon hid from Anakin were such a warning, so now we don't know what the Force was warning us from and since they are so well hidden to protect him, Anakin won't be able to recognize the danger again when he sees it."

Oh. That really did sound bad. "Did he anything do something stupid then to get back the memories?"

Obi-Wan shook his head. "No, Anakin decided to break the Force a little to keep Qui-Gon here longer."

Ahsoka wondered whether that was the reason Qui-Gon's wound was healing so slowly and no pain medication truly helped. He tried to hide it, but Ahsoka's nose and eyes were better than humans'. She saw him tense, could smell the sickness. Ahsoka bit her lip. "Is that why Qui-Gon's Force is all messed up?"

She didn't know how to describe it in a better way. It felt a little as if Qui-Gon was made up out of strings and someone had cut them and then tied the ropes back together clumsily in haste, leaving a net that could catch his soul, but was incredibly messy.

"A little. There's no telling what messing around with the Force like Anakin did."

(And they wouldn't know for a long while what it meant to force something to live. No matter how good the intentions at that moment, the residue of his actions left Maul awake, alive, alight in the dark side, and screaming.)

"Is he going to be okay again?" Ahsoka asked.

When Obi-Wan didn't reply immediately, she climbed back into his lap and let him wrap his arms around her. Jedi were the happiest when they weren't cold, and her family felt as if they needed a lot of warmth.

"I hope so," Obi-Wan replied. "I really do hope so."

For the first time since he had gotten his first gray hair, Qui-Gon actually felt old. He was tired all the time and his control over the Force was atrocious and depended on the time of day, what he had eaten for breakfast, the weather, and whether somewhere halfway across Coruscant somebody had totaled their Speeder, or so it felt to him at least. There was no rhyme or rhythm to whether he could use the Force at all and what his control over it was, not even as his body recovered.

His gut wound hadn't healed entirely yet, and he continued to be haunted by its phantom pains. He knew that it hurt Anakin, that he felt guilty, so Qui-Gon tried to avoid showing any of these weaknesses around the boy, but Anakin was an intelligent child and he noticed it anyway. Qui-Gon wondered if Anakin's sudden clinginess and paranoia resulted from his actions, actions he now had to justify himself for.

"Are you sure you wouldn't prefer to sit?" Plo asked.

Qui-Gon wanted to reply with words as sharp as the edge of a knife, but he shouldn't. Plo was asking him out of worry and because they were friends, not to belittle him or point out his discomfort to him.

"I'm quite sick of sitting and lying down," Qui-Gon confessed. It hurt to admit this weakness, was he fully his Master's Padawan in this aspect, and against what his heart was telling him, he forced himself to say it out loud. "But a chair would be appreciated."

They got a chair for him and so Qui-Gon sat in front of the assembled Council, laying his mind bare for them to see and judge.

"Obi-Wan's report states that Padawan Skywalker had a breakdown as you boarded the ship to Naboo again. Is this correct?"

"Yes."

"And following this breakdown, you put a heavy mind block on him. Is this true as well?"

"Yes," Qui-Go replied, or maybe it would be more correct to claim he apologized.

He didn't regret saving Anakin then. It had come at a high price, his own mind still bleeding where he had cut himself on the kyber crystals of Anakin's soul, but he regretted that it had come to this at all. Trifling with a mind like this was nothing that could be taken lightly, and had the Council not asked to see him, Qui-Gon would have accused them of negligence. "I saw no other choice."

"What did you saw in his mind that forced you to act like this?" Mace asked.

"I saw a reflection of his own state of being, I suppose." His words sounded stuporous, too carelessly chosen, but he didn't know how else to describe this feeling. The more he attempted to elaborate on what he had seen, the more he realized that their language lacked the terms he needed

"I don't think the Force was meant to be anything more than something that binds the world together," Qui-Gon declared. "But Anakin… His existence defies that. He is the Force incarnate and it hurts him, subconsciously. The Force is endless and in Anakin, they have to constrain themself to a body with mortal limits, a fact which unsettles him down to his core when he becomes aware of it. From my observations, which I fail to describe accurately here and I fear to share with the state of my own mind and control, merely having consciousness is unsuitable for a being such as Anakin. We have all heard the voice of the Force, its call and its will, but it doesn't want as we do, as mortals might."

"But Anakin does," Plo continued his thought. "So you have the Force turned sentient, which goes against everything they ever were before, and suddenly they have to deal with the fact that Anakin has wants and needs that go beyond that of his parent."

"Yes," Qui-Gon agreed. "I think – or at least the way Anakin perceived it – the Force is shackling themself with his existence, in his existence. He became aware of it through a factor I have not yet determined, and that resulted in his breakdown."

"And so you decided to cover up these shackles."

"I did."

It was the only way he could have stopped Anakin from self-destructing.

The Force had shifted for the third time in less than a decade after so many years of slowly eroding away.

It was strange. Where once it was clouded, twisted, and shadowed as his Master and his Master's Master had crafted it, there was a rift now, a clearing.

It was shedding light on objects that should not be seen.

Darth Sidious pulled the shadows closer around himself and, throwing one last glance at his Master's dead body, decided to investigate.

He had need for an apprentice.

#star wars #anakin skywalker #obi wan kenobi #qui gon jinn #shmi skywalker #count dooku #fanfic

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tragedy-for-sale · 4 years ago

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Not Even Half as Pretty

*breaths in Codywan angst*

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What were they? Cody asked himself that question so many times it was embarrassing. At first it hadn't been anything serious, flirting and moments a little more intimate than that of friends. But they never spoke of those moments, Cody wanted to ask a thousand times, but never did he, and now, he didn't think he needed to ask.

For all the moments they spent together didn't mean anything compared to what he was watching now. Watching Obi-Wan's eyes follow the Duchess as she walked by. All the whispers that followed, as if it was such an oddity that Obi-Wan Kenobi could love. As if absolutely no one assumed that Cody and him were anything. They weren't as bad as Anakin and Amidala. But had no one really suspected anything?

Cody felt like a fool for feeling as he was. All titles aside, all roles aside, it was a losing game, love. The Duchess was a sight for sore eyes to everyone except Cody, Obi-Wan was the only person who completely mesmerized him. But Obi-Wan didn't look at him like that, not how he looked at the Duchess.

It was foolish of him to act like a heartbroken teenager. He was a soldier, a grown ass man. But he was sitting here, all alone, feeling heartbroken. Pity and self doubt creeping in, letting his stupid thoughts of love consume him. 'I shouldn't be so surprised' looking into the mirror, he thought of how his image compared to The Duchess of Mandalore. She was a woman as breathtaking as the setting sun, and he, he was nothing. He wasn't anything compared to her, 'I'm not even half as pretty' not at all, not at all.

Turning away from the mirror, he took a deep breath, closing his eyes, he really would try to be anything to get Obi-Wan to look at him even a fraction of the way he looked at her. But standing there, watching the way they looked at each other. He felt wrong for ever being kissed by him, because why would Obi-Wan Kenobi ever kiss him? Why would he ever want to kiss Commander Cody, who wore a scarred face of dozens of men just like him. His face wasn't memorable. He wasn't breathtaking, he wasn't special. He wasn't anything.

He found his way to his brother, Rex. Taking a seat next to him. Looking down, he fiddled with his thumbs. Cody's silly crush, his stupid little lie that he'd fallen in love with someone who loved him just as much, it was something Rex knew about. But Rex didn't know just how much his brother loved his general. Cody liked him so much, so much that he'd do anything. He'd change himself to be pretty, or at least try to be.

Tugging at his gloves, Cody felt his stomach doing backflips, taking the gloves off he messed with the cuticles of his nails. Ugly. His hands were dirty, cut, and almost bleeding. Every part of his body was just as ugly as his hands. As he fiddled with his nails he realized he might just be desperate enough to try to be someone memorizing, someone pretty. "Rex," Cody mumbled, "I wish I was pretty."

Rex looked over to his brother, "What?" Scanning his brother he saw that Cody was dead serious. "Cody, what do you mean?" Why would he wish to be pretty? Clones weren't unattractive, and looks didn't matter for soldiers.

"I mean I want to be pretty," looking up, he felt his breath go short as he saw the generals, them his head shot down in shame. It didn't take Rex long to figure it out.

'Oh' Rex mumbled as he glanced to General Kenobi then his brother, "Oh, Cody, what's going on? What did you do?" He asked, putting an arm around his brother.

Cody leaned into his brother, closing his eyes, "I did something stupid, Rex," he muttered, feeling so stupid. Completely stupid, useless and foolish. Wanting to destroy himself so that Obi-Wan might, might look at him like he was something special, "I'm stupid," sitting up, he wiped away his tears. He could wish to be someone prettier but that would be a waste of time.

"You're not stupid, Cody," Rex assured his brother, but Cody looked up, a part of him knowing Rex was right, but a larger part of Cody just didn't believe his brother. He was stupid.

"I fell in love, Rex," Cody stated, sounding almost bitter, "And for a soldier to fall in love, for a clone to fall in love, is incredibly stupid, I mean come on!" Cody laughed in agony, "We're not supposed to fall in love, love is like living," he stated, "Love is feeling alive and we're not supposed to feel alive,"

"We're supposed to die"

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|| Tag List ||

@ct7567329 @a-lil-perspective @mageofcole @advcntura @crying-at-ikea @stuckyjacos @crahsystor @satan-incarnate-666 @kalm421 @passionofthesith @mackstrut @jonathananubian @kamino-mermaid @hotnthorny @jyvorakal @xdangerouslysoftx @big1ron @blue-haired-grace @rangerslayer-97 @alienoresimagines @iironapple

#*laughs maniacally*#clones #clone wars #star wars #tcw #sw #commander cody #codywan #Obi-Wan Kenobi

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twilightofthe · 4 years ago

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@nerdgatehobbit Hey! Thanks for the question! Ik you asked this to my main but imma respond on my SW blog if that’s okay?

So whew that’s a big question. Do I honestly think that Dave kept Obi Wan and Padmé and then Anakin and Satine from interacting in the TCW show because they didn’t want shipping wars?

(Remember, these are all just my personal opinions. I do me and you do you!)

Short version? Yes and no. Long version? Under the cut because I can never shut up.

Firstly, I don’t wanna say this was all Dave’s decision. He was one of the top guys in charge of TCW, yes, but he was far from the only one, there was an entire creative team working on the project, and during the time of TCW’s original six seasons Lucasfilms was not owned by Disney yet and George Lucas himself had a very large amount of creative control over the entire show. So I don’t really think it’s fair at all to point fingers at any choices the show made and go “yep that’s completely 100% Dave’s fault alone”.

I also don’t quite think they were concerned about shipping wars in the way ATLA had them. Avatar’s shipping wars were so absolutely toxically rancid that they legit drove me right out of that fandom. I’m still hesitant to come back during the current renaissance because of them. Star Wars, prior to the Sequel Trilogy, never had shipping wars close to that calibre of pure nastiness. The fandom was a godawful cesspool that fought to the death on most aspects of the franchise, this has always been true, but shipping, if I’ve read right, was somehow never really one of those hot button issues within fandom. I don’t think Lucasfilms kept the Clone Wars four apart because they were afraid of fans fighting over ships.

That being said, Lucasfilms HAS always been Very Strict on how they want their characters to be seen, romantic-wise, way back to when they would terrorize Original Trilogy slash shippers back in the 80’s and 90’s with threats of legal action. It’s part of why they were Very Firm in their insistence that they had absolutely nothing to do with all the Luke/Mara Jade EU stuff. You either abided by LF’s canonical romances or not at all in their world. So yes, in the case of Obi Wan and Padmé, I absolutely think the writing team’s decision to keep the pair of them apart was almost entirely so fans didn’t ship them together.

Why do I think this? Because there is no other rational reason why Obi Wan and Padmé haven’t had a single second of screentime in TCW that hasn’t had either Anakin or Satine also in the room as a buffer. Not when Revenge of the Sith EXPLICITLY portrays their relationship as relatively close friends who care about each other. So nope, I genuinely think the show just doesn’t want the fans to consider any other relationship for Padmé besides Anakin.

But why would they do this just to her and Obes? Obi Wan and Padmé both have other friends of different genders, why don’t they worry about us shipping THEM? Well for Obi Wan’s case, it can be excused that he flirts with everyone, so we’re conditioned to think that it’s never anything serious, and none of the other characters are married to the main character of the series. This is entirely because of Padmé’s position. Yes, she has other male friends, but either they’re nonhuman and not conventionally attractive so the series doesn’t see them as a threat, they’re Clovis, who they actively show Anakin going into a jealous fit over, or they’re Bail, who can be excused by the fact that he’s already married and also because he’s never actively shown as in competition with Anakin for anything, so he’s not threatening either.

Obi Wan, on the other hand, is a major threat to Anidala in the show’s eyes. They already constantly make a point to compare him and Anakin in almost every opportunity. Which is strange, the show’s decision to force them into the role of narrative foils to each other when in the movies that isn’t the case at all— Obi Wan is much more of a foil to Sidious and Anakin’s foil is Luke —but yeah, the show very often has Obes and Ani going through similar situations with competing viewpoints— ESPECIALLY their canon romances, and I won’t rant about how the show’s attempted Anidala and Obitine parallels fall apart under scrutiny right now but if yinz want the rant sometime let me know.

Obi Wan also has the canonical ability to charm the pants off of literally everyone he meets. Nearly everyone in canon is in love with him, 80% of the fandom at least is in love with him, and I KNOW most of the crew was in love with him too. Anakin, on the other hand, has a very abrasive personality and is much easier to dislike. The show was ALREADY terrified of the fans not liking or wanting to root for Anakin to the point that they reworked his entire personality to make him more palatable to his critics from the movies. Plus, Obidala fans already existed! Since the first and second PT movies, a big group of people already shipped these two because they already thought Obi Wan was a preferable match to Padmé than Anakin. The studio did not want to encourage this.

So yes, I think it was a combination of the show’s tendency to already try and get the fans to compare Obi Wan to Anakin for everything else plus their insecurity in Anakin’s image and likeability as it was, that they did Not want the handsome charming not-future-evil guy around the leading lady and threatening her canon romance by existing as a possibly better option. So Obi Wan and Padmé got no stories together, just kinda throwing the opening ROTS left them in the garbage ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ The worst part is, there is so many potential places in TCW where Obi Wan and Padmé could talk to each other, like during her investigation into her friend’s murder, during the Clovis arc, bits during the Malevolence arc, the earlier Naboo crisis arcs, even the one time where she’s just hosting a damn party and wants to invite her friends gahhhhhhhh

Anakin and Satine, I also think yes, but this is also a case of half and half because Satine isn’t nearly as major a character as the other three are, and out of the nine episodes she appears in, she only has more than a singular line in seven of them, and out of those seven, only two of them aren’t revolves entirely around building her relationship with Obi Wan. So really, there is a defence for the writers here in noting that there’s not as much room to explore Satine’s character as it is, let alone trying to shoehorn in a scene with Anakin.

Except no, I’m not gonna give them that defence because in the two episodes where she only has a speaking line or less— Obi Wan’s funeral and the Ahsoka and Lux meet Death Watch ep —I can already easily think of ways she and Anakin could have really meaningful interactions in them both. Y’all have already heard my bit on how they could have a real important conversation at the funeral, but y’all HAVEN’T seen my idea for a rewrite of the Carlac ep where it’s a two-parter, Anakin comes with Ahsoka and Padmé to the negotiations on Mandalore, and it ends up with a subplot of Anidala chasing after Ahsoka and Lux with Satine as the put-upon third wheel and we get foreshadowing to Satine being Bo Katan’s sister, so when the reveal happens the next season it actually means something.

So yeah, it was partially because of timing constraints, but it was also DEFINITELY in part because they didn’t want Satine being shipped with Anakin— which ppffffft, if they were brave enough to actually try writing these two in a conversation in-character, they’d understand how much of a not-worry this would be xD —because the show is set on the fact that despite maybe there being other flings at some point, Obi Wan and Satine are each other’s one true tragic love (Or, at least Obi Wan is Satine’s. He’s always had more freedom and decision than she has in this narrative, and that’s always kinda bugged me). So, that means Satine can’t interact with any men unless they’re gonna betray her trust and try to kill her by the end of the episode, because the show needs Obi Wan to have a loyal, steady, good girlfriend because he is a good man.

(And yes, before anyone says it, I have heard the more unpleasant rumors behind why exactly Obi Wan was given a girlfriend in the show, but as I’ve yet to see any official proof of them besides fandom salt, I’m not gonna spread them because those are hefty accusations to throw around).

So yeah, Satine can’t talk to Anakin partially because time constraints, but also because she isn’t allowed to talk to any other nice men besides Obi Wan and her son (no I don’t particularly like the Korkie Kenobi thing, but it is blatantly obvious that that is what the show was implying and I’m not gonna pretend otherwise), and Obi Wan and Padmé can’t talk to each other entirely because the show saw Obidala as a threat to Anidala.

Again, just my opinions and things I noticed, y’all are more than free to disagree and discuss with me.

#can i EVER answer someone’s question without going on an entire ranting spiel? stay tuned to find out lol #ask #asks #nerdgatehobbit #sw the clone wars #morai musings #our only ho #queen of my heart #peace out #one (1) hot mess

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azwriting · 5 years ago

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Redemption (Forget Me Not, Kylo Ren x Reader) - Chapter Fourteen

I’m so sorry this took so long to write, I kept debating with myself on how to write it. Anyways I hope you enjoy as we are almost done with this story, only more chapter after this!

Summary: Kylo Ren must face Palpatine before he can find (Y/N), but he needs to be his true self in order to do both.

Warning(s): Mild violence, TROS spoilers (It’s not really spoilers but I based it off of tv spots and what I hope happens in the upcoming movie, I totally understand if some of you wait to read until after seeing the movie!)

Word Count: 6607

Rey took deep ragged breaths, watching the cloud of moisture splash across the floating Death Star wreckage. She knew he was coming, she could sense it, and the next fight about to occur. They had run into each other so much over the past couple days: Pasana, the fight on the Star Destroyer, and now this. It was tiring, the same relentless fight, and she was beginning to lose faith in herself and this battle. “Breathe Rey, just breathe. Let it guide you.” (Y/N)’s disembodied voice reminded her. Stars, she wished she had had more time with her before she disappeared. If she had perhaps she would feel ready to face him again, but Rey knew the truth. She was never ready to face him, not while hope still burned in her.

A large wave crashed over the floating debris when Rey finally saw the red crackling light of his saber through the mist. His towering black figure emerged from the spray of water, his inky black hair stuck to his face. He glared at her with such intensity it caused her to shake with anticipation. Their previous fights would not compare to this, no too much rage was building in them, waiting for this. She knew he was furious with her for taking (Y/N), blamed everyone for ruining their bliss, but he could only truly blame himself. Kylo twirled his saber as he stalked forward and Rey tightened her grip on hers, readying herself for the inevitable.

Kylo sneered at the sight of her, unwelcome painful memories surfacing in response. He had not seen or felt (Y/N) through the Force in so long, not since the night they connected, the night she left. Their combined powers demolishing their sanctuary and their bond. Now he was just as alone as he was before. The only comfort he felt was the fact she was alive, just not with him. A twisted part of him hoped she was nearby, hidden with the Resistance members, and he could get just a glimpse of her face. But did he really want her to see him fight Rey? He knew he did not want her to see this side of him, the last time she had she left. All because he was unwilling to turn. How pathetic he felt, all this power he had accumulated and still he was nowhere near what he truly desired. He shook away the thoughts that plagued him endlessly and swung at Rey.

Rey easily deflected his strike with her lightsaber and the two continued their assault on each other, their inner aggression boiling over. Each hit was meticulous both dominating. She had grown stronger thanks to her brief training with (Y/N) and Leia who had taken over after her mysterious disappearance. She swung her saber forward, spinning into the hit. Kylo moved to strike at her again, but Rey’s hand shout out stopping his lightsaber in mid-air. Kylo struggled against the hold, but he could not free his saber.

“Stop this Ben! Think of (Y/N)!” Kylo’s eyes softened for a moment, his struggling halting. If only she knew how much he did think of her, she never left his thoughts. Her smile, her confessions of love, her embraces, her leaving and denying their love.

He swallowed thickly, “Don’t talk about her, she hates me!” He had dared to ask her to join him even when he swore to himself he never would, not again. That was how he lost her the first time, he never intended to repeat that. Those glowing yellow eyes still haunted him, the look of hurt on her face when he refused to come, the anger that arose when she told him they were nothing. How could she not hate him? He hated himself.

Rey scoffed, her hand still suspending his saber. “Maybe she wouldn’t if you hadn’t put that bounty on her head!”

Kylo shook with anger at her reminder. “I told you I would never do that!”

Rey only rolled her eyes, tired of his lies, her hand releasing his saber. She knew she was not going to break through to him, not when he continued to deny everything. Kylo was quick to resume his attack on her, his pain driving his assault forward. Rey dodged it and the two fought across the wreckage, wobbling at the shift in the water and slippery surface. Clash after clash the two were relentless as Kylo heard a soft echo from beyond.

“Ben.” The voice was soft, he knew it better than his own, (Y/N). The distraction tore his attention away from the fight, his brown eyes scanning the waters for the (Y/H/C) he loved so dearly. Was she here? He found nothing beside the traitorous Stormtrooper and another young woman standing beside him, their eyes trained back on them. She was not here, he knew that.

A loud groan escaped his lips as he crumbled down, Rey’s lightsaber retracting from his side. He fell slack to the surface of the Death Star in pain, Rey hovering over him, breathing harshly as her eyes observed him intensely. She looked regretful despite it all, but an upset almost dark edge worked its way into her voice as she spoke.

“How could she ever love you?” Rey spit, distraught over the fact that her friend was hiding from him, whether he had mandated the order or not. (Y/N) was missing because of him and she could not even have the satisfaction of telling him. No, she promised Leia he would never find out, for (Y/N)’s sake. According to the lie she told him on Pasana, (Y/N) was stuck on base because she was a danger to the Resistance the minute she left. All because of the bounty he denied putting on her, claiming he would never force him to join him. Kylo’s defeated eyes stared back up at her, pain clear in them. She wondered if it was from his wound or her words. She almost asked, wanting to dig the knife in deeper, but instead she turned to leave him to rot, to leave him with his overpowering regret.

Kylo watched as Rey vanished into the crashing waves, the former Stormtrooper and woman escaping with her. “I don’t know.” His answer went unheard as he dropped his head back onto the metal. He closed his eyes at the burning sensation in his side, savoring in the feeling of the pain. He had felt so numb since she had left, this seemed to be the only reminder he was alive. But what was considered living? This was no life. This constant anger, regret, and sadness that lived in him was not what life was. He had struggled with the inner darkness his whole life, he could not recall a time before the dark thoughts, but had fought them for her. His light, oh how he had let her down. Yes they had been young naive children but he still loved her as much as he did the day they said their vows. Yet, the darkness had grown, he was manipulated all these years by power-hungry Dark side users, becoming the fearsome Kylo Ren in return. He had made so many mistakes, so many things to atone for. But was he too late?

“It’s not too late.” A deep voice called out to him. Kylo opened his eyes and sat up, his burning wound making itself known once again. His dark eyes tried to focus on the image in front of him, but it was difficult. It looked like a man, but something was off about him. Kylo blinked his eyes once again, trying to fight the dizziness, finally honing in on the man before him. He was edged by an ethereal blue light, his body not fully solid. His light brown hair was curly, blue eyes watching him with a small scar running down his right eye. He wore brown and taupe colored Jedi robes and a stoic expression. He was familiar, Kylo knew him from somewhere, but still was unsure of who the Force Ghost was standing in front of him.

“Who are you?” His voice was thick with skepticism, eyeing the ghost strongly. His grip tightened on his lightsaber even if he knew it would do the ghost no harm.

The man laughed at him, a deep true laugh, eyes never straying from his. “You already know Ben.” Kylo furrowed his eyebrows, no he did not. He would not have asked if he did.

He shook his head in defiance, “No I’m afraid I don’t.” The man only grinned, Kylo was unsure what was so amusing about all of this. Was this even real? Perhaps his pain had made him black out, why else would a former Jedi be standing before him?

“You’re as stubborn as your grandmother,” The man paused quirking an eyebrow at Kylo, “I’m Anakin Skywalker.” The name vibrated deep inside Kylo, the air knocked from his lungs. He was silent staring wide-eyed at the ghost, the ghost of his grandfather, the Chosen One. The Jedi who became the fearsome Lord Vader, a Dark side Force user. How was he in the Netherworld? Adorned in Jedi robes nonetheless?

“How?” Was all he could muster out, still in disbelief. Anakin’s smile dropped, swallowing thickly before beginning.

“I turned to the Dark side, that much is true, but as my children neglected to tell you is that I turned back.” Kylo was flabbergasted, the man who’s legacy he had chased, idolizing, had turned back to the Light before death? He felt as if he was intertwined in a web of lies, not knowing where one started and ended.

“Ben it’s not too late.” His grandfather reiterated, bending down to Kylo and his hand stretching out. Kylo felt his side begin to tingle and soon the burning was gone. He was healed! He looked up to his grandfather his bottom lip wobbling ever so slightly, tears in his eyes.

“Isn’t it though? I’ve done so much damage.” Anakin only shook his head, a soft smile on his face.

“No it’s never too late. Turn back to the Light Ben and put an end to all of this as I failed to do so all those years ago.” Kylo shook under his gaze, absorbing his words. These voices had controlled him, isolated him from his family, until he no longer existed, and only a shell was left. He had put so much blame on everyone else when he needed to realize who was truly at fault. Yes, he had been coerced to the Dark side by other events, but one pulled the strings behind the curtain. He grew angry at the realization at the darkness that surrounded his life, his family, all because of one. This needed to end, the accumulation of events over the decades, through the generations, all led to this.

Kylo nodded closing his eyes. He felt the light inside him grow, he willed it to. He stopped fighting allowing for his true self to break free. No more chasing the past, chasing the legacy of the Skywalker name. No he would do just as young (Y/N) had told him, be himself. He thought of his mother, the woman who loved him so much, even through all the torture he had put her through. He thought of his father, the man who sacrificed himself in hopes that it would save his son. He thought of his uncle, the man who cared so deeply for nephew’s future that he was scared, and Kylo had mistaken it for fear of him. He thought of (Y/N), his wife who had stood by his side and loved him endlessly despite his mistakes. The woman who had fought for him when he felt no one else had. He would fight for them now, to bring this all to a conclusion.

The barricades of the darkness shattered into millions of tiny pieces and he inhaled sharply, free. “So much awaits you my dear boy, you have no idea.” His eyes opened to watch as his grandfather stood back up and Ben Solo rose with him.

Ben and Rey stood next to each other, eyes up and observing the haunting figure perched on his throne chair. Emperor Palpatine. The Sith Lord Ben’s grandfather sacrificed himself to kill, who somehow cheated death. The man who had toyed with his family for too many generations. It would end now.

“Everything I have planned is coming together at long last.” The Emperor's raspy voice croaked out. His beady yellow eyes watched them almost tauntingly, but Rey and him held strong, ignited lightsabers gripped tightly. “I planned for such different outcomes for you both though. Dear Rey you were suppose to give into the darkness in you and you!” His bony finger pointed accustionally at Ben. “You weren’t supposed to turn back. I had made sure of it. I killed that girl’s parents just to ensure it would all go accordingly!” Ben’s stance faltered at the wicked man’s words. His stomach dropped, hoping he did not mean who he thought. The Emperor only laughed his menacing laugh, “You have too much of your grandfather’s heart in you, I knew love would be your undoing just as it was his.”

Ben gulped, he could feel Rey’s eyes on him as well. Had Palpatine forced (Y/N) and him together? Was they’re love all a dark lie? Something he conspired to turn him? Ben felt sick, he could not stomach the thought. First the Emperor had killed her parents to draw them together and then he made them fall in love? Was any of his life his?

An evil cackle tore him away from his spiraling thoughts, “You are naive boy, you two were already destined I only gave it a push. You two were created to be the great balance of the Force, but when your darkness rose and the girl shut herself out, the Force had to find its balance.” Ben’s eyes drifted over to Rey’s, his equal because of (Y/N) shutting the Force out. “It only makes sense young Skywalker. The great-niece of the Jedi Master who found the prophesied Chosen One, and you the grandson of the Chosen one, fall in love. It’s quite poetic actually. It’s a shame I wanted her to die here too, but it seems the First Order is unreliable in finding an asset for their Supreme Leader.” The Emperor teased and Ben tightened his grip on the saber, done with his jesting. The reason there was a bounty on (Y/N)’s head from the First Order coming to light, of course Darth Sidious had been behind it, just like everything else. Temporary relief flooded him though, at the consolation that no evil had binded (Y/N) and him together, but it faded as he thought of that same evil seeking her out to kill her. Now all he needed to do was to fulfill his destiny.

The two advanced forward before lightning emitted from the Emperor’s fingers sending them both down to the ground. Rey and Ben writhed in pain from the lightning, his thoughts immediately going to (Y/N). He feared he would never see her again, never get to apologize and confess how much he loved her. He feared that he would die here and the Emperor would find and kill her. This was how the Skywalker story would end along with the whole galaxy. His eyes drifted over seeing Rey convulsing in pain too, trying to fight against the Emperor. He wanted to close his eyes, he could not fight against the draining pain anymore, but something illuminated by the lightning caught his attention. Just beyond their bodies stood the Force Ghost of Luke Skywalker, his grandfather, and a white-haired old man.

“Confronting fear is the destiny of a Jedi. Your destiny.” Luke encouraged him and the two other men nodded.

“Your journey nears its end.” The Emperor cackled, unaware of the three men standing to the side. Ben felt a wave of energy, power, encompass him. Generations of Jedi now coursing through him. Gritting his teeth he pushed himself up onto his trembling legs, his movement shocking Palpatine, his assault stopping on them both.

“No!” Ben’s voice boomed across the dark throne room.

The Sith Lord only snickered and snapped his fingers back outwards, lightning pouring from them once again. Only this time Ben caught it, his hands absorbing the energy Palpatine bestowed upon him unwillingly. The Emperor halted immediately, eyes wide in fear. “I’m a Jedi like my grandfather before me and I will finish what he started!” With that Ben released the lightning, Palpatine letting out a shriek of pain. Ben continued on only relinquishing once Palpatine perished into nothing once and for all.

He stumbled back, gasping for air, his hands still tingling. He looked to his side seeing the three smiling Force Ghosts fade away, destiny fulfilled. “Something wonderful has happened.” He heard his grandfather’s voice whisper before they were truly gone from sight. Once they were gone, Ben helped a weak Rey stand up. He wanted to apologize for everything, for all the fighting he had caused, but instead the two shared a soft smile.

“Let’s go home.”

Ben climbed out of his ship, the warmth of the jungle planet enclosing around him as he watched Resistance members run and embrace each other. The whole Resistance and galaxy celebrating the defeat of the First Order, most not even aware of the battle that occured against Darth Sidious. Stars, he did not even know that the Resistance had taken down the First Order during their confrontation with the Sith Lord. Rey climbed out of her ship and quickly hugged the former Stormtrooper, Finn as he called himself now, along with the pilot Poe. Both of the men’s eyes flickered over to his looming presence nervously. Kylo Ren returned from the Dark? It was an impossible thought supposedly. Turning from them, his brown eyes scanned the crowd, searching for the one thing that could make him forget all the horrors. He was nervous would she even speak to him? He begged the Force she would.

“She’s not here.” A familiar voice called up to him. Ben broke away from his search of the crowds to the short woman who stood below him. Tears had gathered in her brown eyes and he felt his eyes well up with tears as well. “Ben.” She whispered, unsure. He knew she could sense the Light in him, but she was afraid to get her hopes up.

“Mom.” He croaked, collapsing down into her arms. Leia attempted to wrap her arms around his wide torso as they both cried into each other. He was always so consumed by his hatred for his father and uncle or his longing for (Y/N), he often disregarded his mother, the woman he loved most. They stayed locked in each other’s arms for awhile, ignorant to the observing eyes and celebrating heroes. It was only then that the meaning of her first words dawned on him.

Ben pulled back abruptly, “What do you mean she’s not here?” His mother sighed heavily; Rey, Finn, and Poe approaching in the background, melancholy expressions on each of their faces.

“She’s gone Ben.” His heart plummeted. Gone? Surely she did not mean gone, gone? No he would have felt her leave the world, Rey would have told him, gave something away.

“Where did she g-go?” He risked, uncertain he was ready for the answer. She was not dead, no he refused to believe it.

“I don’t know. One morning we all woke to find her quarters empty and her X-Wing gone. No note, no nothing.” His mother explained, the three Resistance members hesitantly nodding along. A weight lifted from his shoulders, she was alive just not here.

“When was this?” The leather of his gloves creaked not from anger but anxiety. Was she okay? Was she safe? “A month after she got back.’ Rey answered, sharing a careful look with Leia.

Ben’s eyes widened in fear, “That was five months ago!” His mother nodded, a glimmer hidden in her eyes as she placed a gentle hand to his upper arm. “Ben relax, she’s safe.”

“So you say.” Poe mumbled under his breath, but Ben still caught it. He shot the pilot a glare, but he only looked like a scared boy, eyes wide with tears.

“It’s her Dameron!” Leia interjected, squeezing Ben’s arm in the process. He furrowed his eyebrows turning back to his mother. “What’s her?” Leia smiled softly, “Come, I have something to show you.”

The group stalked through the command center, the celebrating eyes turning to Ben. His black attired made him stick out like a sore thumb. He did not care though, their confusion and fearful thoughts bared him no discomfort, he needed to find (Y/N). “Connix! Pull up the FMN 1219 files please!” His mother shouted and a young woman with dirty blonde hair stopped her chattering and proceeded to gather the files on a nearby datapad. Ben watched as the young woman handed the datapad to his mother, Connix looking familiar for some odd reason. He could not place it. “Once a month we receive encoded messages using the Resistance code.” His mother informed him, squinting down at the screen in her hands.

“How do you know they are from her?” Leia let out a short laugh, handing him the datapad.

“They only ever say one thing…” The datapad displayed five decoded messages, one for every month she had been away. She was right, it was only one word sent every single time, Lele. Ben let out a quiet chuckle it was her, she was okay. Leia smiled up at him, enjoying the sound of the laugh she missed so much. Over the past decade she had only been graced with his screeching by Tie Fighter.

“Where is she?” Ben questioned, looking to his mother expectantly.

The woman winced slightly, “That is a mystery. The messages don’t transmit coordinates, only the transponding datapad she’s been using to send them.”

“Okay so message her, ask her where she is!” Ben instructed pushing the datapad into his mother’s hands. She only fought against him, shoving it back into him.

“I did Ben, a few weeks ago. I was planning on visiting her, but to prevent anyone from intercepting the message,” She meant him, the First Order, “She sent me a riddle. One I haven’t been able to solve.” He exhaled loudly at that, why would he assume she would make it easy to find her? He wished she would reconnect to the Force, then maybe he could connect with her, and find her that way. But that was a hopeless thought, she still thought he was Dark. Leia’s nimble fingers swiped the screen to reveal a separate decoded message. “ P10to9raph.” Ben assessed the word and numbers, pulling the latter from the word. 10 and 9, Photograph.

Ben ran through the meadows surrounded by glistening waterfalls, glad to finally be free of the stuffy delegate chambers his mom had dragged the family to. “Ben!” He heard a soft voice laugh out behind him. He glanced over his shoulder to see the small braids of (Y/N) flopping around as she chased after him. He let out a chuckle, choosing to tease her instead of slowing down.

“Keep up (Y/N)!” He heard her let out a huff and her feet pick up, until he heard the sound of something tumbling. Halting immediately, Ben turned to see her lying face down in the grass. His stomach flipped afraid she was hurt. Running back he dropped down into the grass beside her, his mother shouting to see if she was alright. His hands shakily reached out to roll her onto her back, nervous about what he would see. The first thing he saw was her white teeth as she wore a sheepish grin. Ben let out a sigh of relief, he could not fathom the thought if something happened to her because of him.

“I fell.” (Y/N) giggled out and he could only laugh in return, glad she was okay.

“So clumsy!” Ben chastised, pulling her back up to her feet.

“Kid’s come here, Han take a photo of us!” Ben and (Y/N) groaned looking to his parents sitting on a blanket just above on a hill.

“Coming Mom!”

“Coming Lele!” (Y/N) smiled briefly before she pushed him and raced back towards Leia. Ben only smirked chasing after her, his best friend.

“We don’t know what she means.” Rey informed, both her and Leia observing the screen intently.

Ben smiled down at the datapad, it was as if she had written the puzzle just for him. “But I do.”

His heavy boot tapped impatiently against the floor of the Millenium Falcon, his father’s ship...The ship he had grown up on. When was the last time he had been on here?

Ben sat at the round table, head hanging down watching the ground, as his troubling thoughts plagued him. His clammy hand clasped tightly inside (Y/N)’s, both seeking comfort. He could sense her excitement her joy of the occasion, the last thing he wanted to do was bring her down, but he needed to confess. “They’re only sending us away because of me.” He mumbled, his black curls falling in front of his eyes. It was an accident, he had gotten upset one night, he never meant to break the table.

“No they want us to become Jedi, to master the ways of the Force!” She corrected him, her bright smile that usually could make him feel better, only seemed to deepen his frown. There was a side to him, a dark voice that seemed to beckon him closer, taunting him with unjust things. He tried to fight it but it only seemed to grow louder the older he got. He was fearful of himself and so was his loved ones.

“N-No… my p-parents are scared, scared of m-me, of this part hidden in me.” He kept his head down as he felt his eyes water. The smaller hand holding his squeezed tightly beckoning to look up at her. (Y/N)’s held a look of certainty, strength, and determination. He felt the voice diminish inside at the sight of it.

“Well I’m not Ben.” He sat up quickly and pulled her into a hug, feeling relieved. She was not afraid of him so maybe he did not need to be afraid of himself either.

It had been so long, so much changing over the years, beside the ship. It still looked as rundown as when his dad used to take (Y/N) and him flying. Just the thought of her had the nerves jolting alive underneath his skin, every hair standing on edge. Would she even see him? Would she forgive him? He had let her down so many times, it was disheartening. Even if she wanted nothing to do with him anymore, something he would painfully accept, he still needed to express how sorry he was. He would walk away if it's what she wanted. He wondered if she was happy, if she had forgotten him and moved on with life? A part of himself did not want to intrude on that contentedness, but he needed to see her, making sure she was alright. And if she would take him back, he would never let her go again.

Ben still could not process the fact that she left. It was unlike her to abandon anything or anyone especially her beliefs or cause. There had to be more to the story, things his mother and Rey did not know. He let out a loud sigh, fisting his dirty black hair wishing he could sense her in the Force for the second time today, just something to ease his conscience.

“You know I don’t feel her either.” A soft voice spoke. Ben picked his head off the wall to find Rey standing in front of him. Leia, Poe, and Finn were walking up the ramp behind her. He had been unaware of the new company on the ship. Poe gave him a glare as he moved past them to the main hold, Finn and his mother following. Ben could sense the immense blame the pilot put on him. He was right, he had been the cause of many problems, especially the worry for (Y/N) embedded in everyone, despite her messages. Rey still had her eyes locked on him, an empathetic smile on her face.

“She cut herself off.” He answered with a simple shrug. (Y/N) had cut herself off from the Force to hide from him, to sever the connection they had been repairing.

Rey exhaled deeply, “Yes, but it’s as if the Force is guarding her.” Ben furrowed his eyebrows at the idea. It was possible… It would explain why he never realized she was alive, why he never saw premonitions of her alive, or why he never saw her inside Poe’s mind. But if he had turned back why was it still hiding her?

Um,” Rey cleared her throat gaining his attention once again, “Chewie is still resting in the med bay so I could use a co-pilot?” Ben’s eyes widened, staying silent, and Rey took that as a bad thing. “Poe could do it if you don’t want to, but I just figured you’d like to and since you know where she is.” She squabbled, fidgeting in place. He sensed her unease, surely not use to having a conversation with him without their lightsabers ignited.

Ben smiled slightly at her rambling, “Sure.” Rey nodded not attempting to hide the large smile that appeared on her face.

“Okay great I’ll be right there.” He offered her a half nod and awkwardly roamed down the hall towards the cockpit.

Rey let out a relieved sigh and turned to find Leia exiting the main hold. The woman seemed obviously cheerier; the war was just about over, diplomatic solutions and the official statement of surrender from the First Order the only thing that remained, her son had returned from the darkness, and now they were on their way to find her surrogate daughter, who turned into her daughter in law. Rey still was a little dumbfounded by the fact (Y/N) and Ben were married, she almost did not believe Poe when he told her about the rings he saw on their fingers. “Why did you lie to him? You told me you saw (Y/N) just before she left.” Rey whispered.

Leia only smiled, “He can’t know the truth Rey, not yet. He must see it for himself.”

Rey was confused, “It?” Leia only put a finger to her lips and walked away, still smiling to herself. She decided to dismiss it for the time being, knowing the truth would be revealed shortly, and walked down the hall to the cockpit.

Inside the small room, Ben sat in the pilot seat, his gloves and cape removed and placed messily onto the seat behind him. His hands hovered over the control wheel as if he was afraid to touch it. He seemed to be deep in thought and Rey had a sneaking suspicion as to why. “Are you okay?” Her question startled him right out of the seat, his head hitting the low ceiling. He turned to face her, his face bright red like a child caught doing something they were not supposed to be.

“Um, I can move-” Rey cut him off gently pushing him back down into the seat. His eyes were wary, his body stiff in the seat.

“Relax Ben,” She urged sitting down in the co-pilot seat, “Where to?” Ben let out a deep breath, his ungloved right hand gently caressing the curve of the control wheel. He was quiet, sinking into the comfort of the chair, burying the regret he felt bubbling over in his chest.

“Set course for the Chommel sector in the Mid-Rim.” He stated, confidence edging its way back into his tone. Rey saw it then and there, glancing over at him, the son of Han Solo.

“Right away Captain.” She teased punching in the coordinates.

Landing on the upper hill in a clearing, Ben was quick on his feet. He ran past the group exiting the main hold and out of the ship before the ramp had even touched the plush grass. The bright sun shining up above welcomed him with a kiss of a warm summer breeze. To his right was a white and orange X-Wing with vast green vines, shrubs, and weeds growing all over it. She was here, he was right. Without a second thought, he took off down the hill towards the towering villa just beyond.

Leia and the trio watched all wearing smiles, “Give him a minute.” Ben booked down onto the cobblestone and was entranced by the spectacular Varykino. It looked just as it did the last time he was here.

Ben fidgeted nervously with the collar of his black tunic, trying to avoid the prying eyes of the Minister. He did not dare turn around either, he could not face his mother’s tears of happiness. He loved the woman dearly but a part of him wished they could have done this secretly. Something the two of them could share, no one else intruding on the intimate moment. But the thought dissipated as he heard the soft chimes in the surrounding trees, feeling a pure aura behind him. He was quick to turn, his breath stolen, and heart stopping immediately. (Y/N)’s glowing figure walked towards him, her white lace dress caressing the cobblestone as if it was kissing it’s long lost lover. Her smile was transfixing along with the rosy blush to her cheeks and sparkle in her eyes. He was so utterly in love with her it physically hurt. And soon she would be his wife, his for eternity just as it was meant to be. The vows he had memorized proved to be true, his entire universe resided in her.

Ben rushed into the house, finding no one on the lower level. Taking two stairs at a time, he found himself on the third floor, his heart racing desperate to find her. He stood at the top of the stairs for a moment, contemplating which way to go when he felt a gentle breeze run through his hair, originating to his right. Entering the one bedroom, he found the large wooden door leading to the balcony open. His heart seized in his chest as he quietly stepped forward, his fear of how this would go surfacing once again. Silently he exited back outside onto the large open balcony, finding a sight that made his throat tighten. Beneath the three large archways, pressed against the hand carved stone railing was (Y/N).

Her back was to him as she watched the blue of the sky merge with the blue of the water, her turquoise dress almost blending in with the scenery. The love of his life completely unaware of him behind her. His lips were sealed as he stepped closer, drinking in her presence, and the odd feeling that enclosed around her. It was almost unnoticeable, barely a trace of it in the Force, the Force most definitely shielding her. His lips parted, trying to conjure up what to say. He had told himself that if she never wanted to see him again he would obey her wish, but now standing this close to her, he could not fathom ever leaving her again. “(Y/N).” His voice was very audible, but he knew she heard him. Her stature seemed to stiffen, her head slowly turning to the side to peer back at him. Her eyes held a look of fear as she stared back at him, her hands roughly clinging to the stone keeping her body turned away from him.

(Y/N) looked to his brown eyes, finding every ounce of regret the galaxy had to offer being held within them. He stepped closer, tears cascading down his dirty cheeks. He was filthy, looking to have been to hell and back. “I’m so sorry.” He cried out taking another step closer. Her eyebrows pinched together, reading the difference in him. This was not the Kylo she had left six months ago, no this was someone else, someone who she loved dearly.

“Ben?” Her voice shook as he let out a sob of relief at the sound of her. He nodded rapidly, his curls bouncing with him.

“Yes it’s Ben. Your Ben.” (Y/N) was still hesitant, gripping the stone till the pads of her fingertips turned white. She needed to be sure this was her Ben and not the Supreme Leader of the First Order. Her (Y/E/C) eyes fluttered shut, willing herself to reconnect to the Force. She knew Ben could feel the surge of energy and life that emitted from her and in return she could feel the Light flourishing inside of him. Her eyes sprung open filled with tears, a soft cry escaping from her lips. Her hands slid off the stone and she slowly turned to face him, her heart racing.

“Ben.”

She turned to face him, uttering his name with her sweet voice. Her smile was hesitant though, her eyes gauging him for some sort of reaction. His eyes drifted down the flowy turquoise fabric of her dress, gold details intertwined into as well, his eyes stopping in shock. He could not seem to form a single word, his eyes trying to blink away the heavy onset of tears that streamed down his face.

A large bump protruded from (Y/N)’s abdomen, the dress beautifully covering it. He eyed her carefully, closing the distance, his ungloved hands hesitantly reaching outwards. His fingers delicately caressed the large curve of her stomach, resting it in the middle, a watery laugh echoing out from his lips. He could feel the life surging out from beneath her skin, the life calling out to him. He could feel (Y/N) and himself blended so perfectly, he could only cry more.

“That’s why you left.” Ben whispered, eyes flickering back up to hers. (Y/N) nodded, her hand resting on top of his.

“I wanted you to know, I did, but-” Ben cut her off, pressing one finger to her lips.

“I understand, I do. I love you so much and I will spend the rest of my life making it all up to you.” He promised her, cupping her face gently. His eyes pleadingly looked down at her, hoping she would let him do that, let him be a loving father and husband.

“I know Spaceboy, I know.” Ben laughed and so did she, before he pulled her into a long-awaited kiss. Ben now could never leave her, nor did he ever want to. This was his entire universe now.

Ben pulled back abruptly, his longer fingers dipping down the front of his black tunic, that only felt so constraining now. He pulled out a black necklace, two rings tied tightly to the end of it. (Y/N) sniffled at the sight, she was never far from his heart, despite it all. Ben quickly untied to the two rings and slid the silver band onto her awaiting finger, doing the same with his. The two were quick to pull each other back into a kiss, their tears mixing together as they melted together once and for all, the awaiting life secured between them and their everlasting love.

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#kylo ren #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren fanfiction #ben solo #ben solo x reader #ben solo fanfiction #star wars series #star wars imagine #Adam driver x reader

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jabbajambler · 4 years ago

Text

When We Were Young

Obi Wan Kenobi x f!OC

Word Count: 2,007

*GIF by @nerdgiffing*

Debris was crashing into the waters, forcing the buildings to shake. The ground started to tremble with every drop. Everything about the apparent victory appeared much too simple. The Separatists were skillful and thought out every move, they would never become so naive.

The clones worked diligently to try and figure out a plan of attack. Everything in the sky was working, or so it appeared. Perhaps working a bit too well.

"I'm gonna press the attack, Master." Anakin's voice came through Obi Wan's comm link. From his point of view, they already won. The Separatist defenses were weak.

"No, Anakin. Wait." Obi Wan was quick to respond. "It's too easy. Not even Grievous would attack so recklessly."

"Master, the battle's up here in space, not down there."

Obi Wan's brow furrowed, creating a sharp crease between the two. His face held more wrinkles than it used to. He'd aged since Aaryn last saw him, but eleven years could not create such stress lines. No, those were from Anakin's constant rebellious tendencies.

It must've run in the Skywalker blood.

Obi Wan was still, in Aaryn's mind, the loveliest person she'd ever laid eyes on. His hair was neatly pushed back away from his face, framed by a reddish beard that was very clearly well-groomed. He was the image of elegance and perfection from every angle.

He presented himself with pride and poise. The confidence seeped from him, filling everyone around him with the same feeling. He was meant to be a leader, he was built for this.

"The debris from the destroyed Separatist ships is the key."

"There's something larger at play here." Aaryn whispered, tearing her eyes from Obi Wan's face to watch the ships fall from the glowing maps around them.

"What are you thinking?" Shaak Ti turned towards him, her eyes wide. She knew his plan, Aaryn did too. But that did not mean they agreed with it.

"I think I'd like to go for a swim." Obi Wan shrugged. "You stay here. Do you understand me, General Skywalker?" He turned towards Aaryn with a stern, darkened look in his eyes.

Aaryn huffed out a quiet scoff and rolled her eyes. "Loud and clear." She delivered a mock salute and directed her attention to the hologram in front of her. She did not like being treated like a child on this mission. Being babysat by the Jedi was not ideal, she knew she was meant for something greater than being watched.

Obi Wan gave her a nod and swiftly left the room. He was a man on a mission, determined and prepared to face anything that came his way.

They continued to work while Obi Wan was off on his own. They hoped he was winning them the battle, but no one could tell. He was difficult to connect to, practically impossible to read.

The rain was pouring down now. It began drumming against the roof like a stampede. The storms on Kamino were dangerous. They were often deadly with the combination of the floods and whipping winds.

Aaryn's brain began to think through all of the worst possible situations with Obi Wan out there. Perhaps even out in the rain. Another foolish decision on his part in her mind. She was left with a choice to make, one that she may regret, but it was something she felt she had to do.

"Excuse me." Aaryn whispered to the Kaminoan. "I just need to use the refresher. Where might that be?"

"Just down the hall we came. Second door to your right."

"Thank you." She smiled and bowed her head as she left, hoping to avoid Shaak Ti's suspicious gaze on her way out. She busied herself with the clones, not concerning herself too much with Aaryn's chaotic decisions.

Aaryn was able to sneak outside into the storm. The rain was rough, pelting her skin with each drop. It was so aggressive that it almost hurt. Her clothes stuck to her body while her hair matted down against her head.

The rain created a haze around her to the point where she couldn't see anything more than five feet in front of her. She searched for Obi Wan, hoping that she might catch sight of a blue blade or a man clad in beige, but there was nothing.

"Damn it." She mumbled, trying to shield her eyes.

Even if Obi Wan was out there, she would never be able to tell.

Another alarm went off from the speakers. It was difficult to see, but Aaryn's eyes caught sight of the flashing lights that alerted everyone of intruders in the building. Her body was growing weary as she stood out in the pouring rain. Certainly any form of exhaustion would not help her in fighting off the battle droids that were crowding the halls.

Inside, the lights beamed a bright red that almost felt blinding when compared to the fog outside. The metal stomps of the droids' feet were loud, masking the sound of the rain that continued to pummel the roof.

Aaryn's footsteps were light as she ran through the hall. All she could think about was finding Obi Wan or Anakin. She could sense their trouble, it clouded her mind to the point she couldn't think of anything else but them. Seeing how the two of them did everything on a whim, it could easily be either one.

"Kenobi, Kamino has fallen." A raspy, strained, and mechanical voice echoed through the hall. Aaryn chased it, finding a tall, robotic man standing over Obi Wan with a pair of lightsabers. "Your clone army is doomed."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that." Aaryn stepped out from behind the corner into the middle of the hall to reveal herself from her hiding spot. "General Grievous? You're dumber than I expected." She grinned and pulled her lightsaber from its clip, twirling it in her hand before she ignited the white blade.

He looked to Aaryn and Obi Wan before crawling away. Grievous could tell he was outnumbered and would be taken care of far too soon for his liking if he stuck around. They could have let him get away and call off the ridiculous attack, but Aaryn always had something to prove.

She took off down the hall after Grievous, running as fast as her legs could carry her. Obi Wan grunted as he stood, snatching his lightsaber from the ground and chasing after her.

The rain came to a halt outside, leaving a heavy mist in its wake as the wind picked up the ocean waters. Aaryn slid onto the platform, gripping her lightsaber tightly in her hand. Her eyes narrowed while they darted around, looking for the robotic Separatist.

"General Skywalker-" Obi Wan started as he reached the runway, but it was too late. Grievous already jumped up behind her, cornering her on the platform with nowhere to run.

He chuckled and spun his sabers while he approached her, but she kept on her stern expression. Aaryn stared into the sabers' light with a look of determination. She didn't fear death and she most certainly did not fear Grievous.

The two circled each other, waiting for someone to take the first strike. Before either of them could move, a piece of debris landed on the runway, breaking it away from the building.

"Aaryn!" Obi Wan shouted as he dove out of the way.

The pad began to tilt, causing Aaryn to stumble over her feet. Grievous tried to use it to his advantage, but she was still too quick for his strikes. Soon, it tilted too far for her to stand.

Obi Wan struggled his way towards his fellow general, but ended up holding onto the edge alongside her for dear life. Aaryn looked to Obi Wan, whose brows were scrunched together in frustration. He was mad, but saving her life was more important to him right now than his anger.

They clung desperately to the metal until they couldn't any longer and plunged towards the icy waters. Obi Wan's arms wrapped around Aaryn while she braced herself for the impact of the water, but it never came.

The two met the back of an Aiwha, lifting them back into the sky. Aaryn could feel the breath of relief that Obi Wan let out against her neck, bringing a chill throughout her body. He helped her shift behind him on the alien, holding tightly to him as they rose up towards the fallen platform.

"We've got to stop meeting like this, my friend." Obi Wan joked and rubbed the beast's neck, giving it a gentle pat.

"You know this thing?" Aaryn snorted, receiving a harsh glare from the man in front of her.

"I don't think I need to hear anymore jokes from you today, General Skywalker. You've done quite enough."

Aaryn let out a puff of annoyance and turned away from him while they flew back to the base. Obi Wan was silent through the ride, but was kind enough to thank the alien before it dove back into the water. The anger that was building inside him had subsided for a moment, but as soon as they were alone, it grew louder than ever.

The fire burning inside of Obi Wan was strong and while he was always one to push aside those harsh emotions, he couldn't hold it back this time. Aaryn was reckless. He knew this, the council knew this, yet they allowed her back so easily.

Just the sight of Aaryn left Obi Wan in a state of shock and the overwhelming emotions that came with it were too much for the Jedi to handle. He hadn't felt such emotions for years and yet with one look, they all came flooding back.

"Are you trying to get yourself killed?" Obi Wan hissed through his teeth with his back faced to the woman. He stared out at the water, unable to bring himself to look her in the eyes. "I had it handled."

Aaryn snorted. "Really? You were on the ground, no lightsaber, completely defenseless. I saved you. Have you truly grown so proud that you can't accept a little bit of help?"

Obi Wan spun around swiftly on his heel, his finger pointed between her eyes as he seethed. "I didn't need help."

"Eleven years ago, you always needed my help. How was I supposed to know any different?"

"Eleven years ago! You think I haven't changed in eleven years? I have grown since you left. I'm not the same person you abandoned on Coruscant." His eyes held a certain ferocity to them that Aaryn had never seen in Obi Wan's innocent blue eyes. They reminded her of her own gaze, menacing and unforgiving as they pierced into anyone who dare look. "You need to learn your place in all of this. We're not on a silly mission, we're in a war. You came to play your part, do it responsibly."

Aaryn sighed and reached her hand out towards his arm, only for it to be ripped from her grasp. "Obi-" She started.

"It's General Kenobi to you." He snapped and turned his back to her once again. Aaryn's heart sunk as she was left with nothing but the shell of a man she used to know. "Gather your things and get on the ship. We're leaving."

He left, not allowing her to speak another word. Knowing Aaryn, she would have been willing to carry out the fight for hours, days if she could. She was relentless and stubborn, that was something about her that had not changed in eleven years.

Aaryn sighed and stared up at the base. She had no need to gather her things, everything she brought was already with her. Her gaze shifted to Obi Wan, watching his disappearing form as he went to gather their troops.

Well, almost everything was with her.

#obi wan kenobi #Obi Wan Kenobi x OC #obi wan needs a hug #daddy wan kenobi #jedi #OC #star wars #clone wars

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ghostlycreatoruniverse · 4 years ago

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Dabi and the awkward black ballon: a narrative comparison between Touya Todoroki and Vinsmoke Sanji

Hello everyone!

I’m really thrilled about this whole situation , I can’t stop coming up with ideas!

This is about Dabi, Hawks and the black balloon. I’m making this post because I’m totally convinced that Dabi hadn’t tell Hawks he was Touya Todoroki. He might have said something that implied it, but I think that this is not all he told to Hawks. I’ll try to cover others possibility in another post, but to consolidate my position I wants to draw another comparison.

This time is between Dabi and Black Leg Sanji from Eiichiro Oda’s great masterpiece: One Piece.

One Piece is a worldwide famous and one of the most important and best sellers manga of this generation. It doesn’t matter if you like it or not: at some point if your life if you like mangas you’re bound to hear One Piece sooner or later.

For those who never read/ disliked it, Black Leg Sanji is one of the main crew character and soon after his introduction he haunted fans with one question: who he really is?

In years hints became gradually more important; however One Piece is full of adventure and emotional moments so you’re bound to forget about it from time to time... just to be reminded that he’s hiding something.

I don’t know what Horikoshi thinks about One Piece, but I think he should know one or two things about it at least . Oda is considered one hell of a mangaka, being able to tie plot lines among the years, so if I were Horikoshi I’d give a look at One Piece to take inspiration. You have to consider this is a good way to avoid having a copycat event in two mangas published on the same magazine.

I’ll explain briefly who Sanji is.

Sanji is the cook of the Straw Hat pirates and he was (almost forcibly) recruited by Luffy before they entering in the Grand Line making him one of the first nakama.

He was introduced with the nickname “Black Leg”, inherited by his boss who raised him like father ( “Red Leg Zeff”). Zeff tried to assault the cruise ship Sanji was working on as a kid, but they both shipwrecked. When they were saved Zeff took Sanji they met Luffy.

In One Piece names are extremely important, but back then readers really hasn’t that feeling and before Sanji, both Nami and Usopp didn’t have a family name. So no one was impressed.

The first foreshadowing something was off happens around Skypeia arc. In fact all the first straw hat pirates (Zoro, Nami and Usopp) were said to be from East blue, thus everyone thought Sanji was too. However after finding a book Nami never heard of, Sanji gave a brief recap adding casually he was from North Blue instead .

A recurring fun gag about him is that when he finally gained his wanted poster an awful drawing of him was placed instead of his photo. Later on another character was introduced: Duval, who is the spit image of the bleak drawing. As funny as it can be, Duval was persecuted for many time, guaranteeing Sanji wasn’t found.

The biggest red herring Sanji gave was around chapters 480+. In front an honourable yet powerful enemy, Sanji was ready to sacrifice his life for his captain’s sake , underlining that he is someone important due to his background.

After that many theories were edited. And this went on for YEARS.

Until, chapter 800+. Around thst arc we finally get to know his full name and backstory. Vinsmoke Sanji was the third male son of a fallen aristocratic family. He had 3 brothers and one sister, an abusive father and a mother who was locked away in a medical facilities. In fact when she was pregnant, her husband forced on her some scientific experiment to turn their kids in the “perfect soldiers” stripping out every sign of humanity from them. She, trying to save her children for this bleak fate, took a medicine to inverse the process. In the end only Sanji was spared and had a kind heart, while she had a chronic illness that few years later killed her. Sanji then was considered a failure by his own father , enough to fake his own death and putting him in a jail. He then escaped to East Blue thanks to his sister who helped him.

Now, Enji seems to be a loving father when compared to Vinsmoke Judge.

Despite Sanji and Dabi’s story being quite similar , what I want to point out it’s the timing.

Oda foreshadowed this for years and gradually. And when the time was about to come, he added even more details to build Sanji’s great revelation. Once it was declared he was a Vinsmoke there was no turning back and all of his past was known in the following chapters. Of course it took some time to develop it all, but Vinsmokes were brand new characters, while Todoroki are very well known, so I expected Touya’s past to be introduced soon after his revelation, like it happened.

My main concern is... why.

Horikoshi chose an approach similar to Oda.

He show us Todoroki siblings one after another. He hinted Touya had a powerful fire type quirk, yet his body couldn’t stand it. He hinted about his death even before Natsuo spoke about it openly, having Fuyumi praying in one panel. In My Villain Academia he inserted baby Fuyumi’s panel. When Dabi was first introduced he spoke like Shoto does and he made clear he wanted to keep his name a secret. We then were reminded that nobody knew who Dabi was, but instead he was thinking about family and hold a personally grudge against Todorokis.

And that’s was fine! It was exactly like Sanji’s and to be expected.

in chapter 267 at the peak of drama the big black balloon happened. I was both intrigued and excited about it because it was something different and new when compared with the iconic One Piece. And so I guessed that we would have to wait a lot of time before knowing the truth. Then chapter 290 happened.

Now, if you compared Sanji’s reveal with Touya’s reveal your noticed that Sanji took years since his first introduction. The most significant and last foreshadowing can be considered his wanted poster, which after Dressrosa arc finally had his picture and full name on it, with the status of “wanted only alive”.

The huge unnerving block balloon was like Sanji’s poster: the moment everyone saw it they thought Dabi said “I’m Touya” as much as everyone said “Sanji’s theory about being some sort of prince/ son of an important family it’s true”.

And it works! Because the moment we knew Touya was Dabi we would have wanted to know how Touya turned into Dabi, as much as what happened to Sanji.

What it doesn’t sound right it why hiding that dialogue with a black ballon in chapter 267 to give us the truth only 6 months later when One Piece took his own sweet time with Sanji.

To me this makes absolutely no sense at all.

But Horikoshi decided differently than One Piece. And illogically.

The only way this would actually makes any sense is if Dabi said something else to Hawks. Or rather: what if he said he was Touya but with another meaning? With last chapters we were overloading with new informations about Dabi/ Touya. So the black balloon isn’t that interesting to us anymore. And conveniently Hawks is out of the games for the moment, so we don’t expect him to say something about it. It might be argued that we don’t need to, not anymore.

However after that sentence which took and entire panel Hawks should have something to say, and he can’t bothered the reader with something we already know.

This comparison ties perfectly with Anakin Skywalker’s: in fact after years it was Sanji’s turned to be talked about. His identity moved One Piece’s story one arc forward.

Instead about Anakin... audience didn’t really need his backstory. It was something you wanted to know, but the story could have worked just fine: you just needed to know Vader was Luke’s father to understand why he saved the Jedi at the cost of his own life.

I thus expect we’ll dig up more into Dabi’s past in the following arcs; no, I’m not delusion: Dabi being Touya won’t move the plot much forward aside from the hero society being totally ruined. And neither will end the Todorokis drama.

The situation is dire, of course, and heroes will have it hard. But still, society needs heroes so they can’t just give up on them. Things will change and won’t change at the same time cause even in the worst case scenario, in which Endeavor and Hawks will stop working and all heroes are fired someone needs to take a stand against Shigaraki.

Touya’s death instead might give another push forward, giving the Todoroki arc a deserved ending.

Bear in mind that this doesn’t mean Dabi can’t die. He totally can. But if into Touya’s death a secret lies this can be useful for upcoming future arcs, even if I doubt Dabi will die here and now.

#Narrative comparison #my hero acadamy #boku no hero academia #dabi my hero academia #one piece #Touya Todoroki #Sanji #Black leg Sanji #Vinsmoke Sanji #plot twists #identity revelation #sanji one piece

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gffa · 6 years ago

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The more I look at the greater scope of Star Wars, the more I realize just how fundamentally necessary these moments are to becoming a Jedi. I was rereading Ezra’s Duel with Danger, which shows Kanan’s point of view on the episode Path of the Jedi, where he’s lost and confused about his path going forward, so Yoda pokes and prods at him, asks him pointed questions and waits for the answers Kanan discovers by looking within himself:

It’s very clear that this was Yoda’s intention all along--to poke at the fears that Kanan had roiling inside him, because a Jedi must always face them, it’s a lifelong struggle to do so. This is exactly what he told Ezra in their first meeting as well--everyone is susceptible to fear, it’s a lifetime of facing it and working through it, looking inside you and confronting the fear and anger that are part of you. Luke sees himself in Vader’s mask because this isn’t about an outside force, but about what he’s taken with him into that cave. Rey sees herself because she’s afraid of this power that’s awake in her, because she’s afraid of who she is without the narrative of her parents. They must confront this about themselves, just as the Jedi younglings confronted their own fears about getting their crystals as all Jedi younglings before them have done, that it’s all what they brought into those caves with them. It’s exactly what Yoda does with Ezra in Path of the Jedi as well, he specifically asks pointed questions and lets Ezra’s feelings bubble up how they will:

It’s when Ezra acknowledges what he came into this place with and works through it--though, of course, it’s not just the one time, this will be a lifetime of looking at his fears, because when you’re a psychic one-man-army, you absolutely need to keep on top of that--Yoda replies with, “A Jedi you may yet be.” Ezra’s journey is very much a parallel of Anakin’s journey (For example: Dave Filoni’s commentary on Rebels season 4/the finale with Ezra’s choice that Palpatine gives him: “…it really becomes, you know, about this idea of doing something because you want it to happen, doing something for yourself, even if it seems like it’s a kind act, you know, to save your friend, my gosh, what could be a better thing to do? But, in the end, it’s perhaps a selfish thing. You see this explored with Anakin when he’s trying to save Padmé, save his wife, and yet, he’s not giving any thought to her own agency and her own ability to save herself. And in doing so, he brings everything toppling down.”) and that’s why comparing the scene in Path of the Jedi to the scene in The Phantom Menace illustrates something important about both of them. In TPM, the Jedi Council is actually really pretty neutral-to-quiet with Anakin, nobody ever even hints that he’s a bad person for missing his mother. They literally just point out the fact that, yes, he’s full of anger and fear and can’t stop thinking about his mother. (George Lucas himself has explicitly said this is why he became Darth Vader, because “he couldn’t let go of his mother, couldn’t let go of [Padme[”.) They don’t say it’s not understandable, but instead they’re pointing out--and rightly so, given the nature of how the Force works, that it’s a psychic feedback loop much of the time, that a Jedi is taught how to harness something that can hurt so many people if they’re not always careful, that we see over and over and over that the dark side is exactly as bad and harmful to people as they warn, if you embrace it--they’re pointing out what he’s actually feeling, trying to get him to see whatever it is that’s really in him. Just like Yoda does with Ezra, the character deliberately paralleled to Anakin in the narrative of Star Wars. Anakin--understandably so, given the shit he was a victim of as a child!--cannot face it and acknowledge it, while Ezra can. Just as Anakin cannot resist making his deal with the devil, Ezra can resist that deal with the very same devil for the very same reward promised. Instead, Anakin denies his feelings, he gets angry when they’re pointed out, he is incredibly human where this is coming from, but this is why they didn’t want to train him. Not because he had fear in the first place--it’s a lifelong struggle to always keep facing that and keep working through it--but because he didn’t show the signs of being willing to do the hard work of looking at himself honestly. Nobody ever says that he’s a bad person for his fears and missing his mother! But that the Jedi path doesn’t seem to be the right one for him, of which there’s nothing wrong with that--in either direction! This is why those scenes all use such similar phrasing and visuals, they’re deliberately echoing and rhyming with each other, in order to invite us to consider the themes of the story and how the Jedi approach things. They have the same context--Yoda’s poking at them (and Kanan as well) to get them to look at themselves, the darkness they have within them, see if they can work through it--and the results are negative images of each other, just as Ezra and Anakin’s deals with Palpatine are negative images of each other.

#anakin skywalker #luke skywalker #ezra bridger #kanan jarrus #yoda #jedi #jedi order #ganodi #rey #meta

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twitchesandstitches · 6 years ago

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Giant Rey, Giant-er Leia

In a timeline just slightly askew to the one more familiar, the Force worked in a slightly different manner. Not too different, not completely irreconcilable with other time lines. A great energy field, perhaps the very essence of sentience and the complexity that generates what might be called life, bound to all living things and empowering those sensitive to it.

And, owing to certain tricks of modification and alterations to the currents of the Force, affecting the bodies of its female users in a very specific way; those sensitive to the Force live long, their bodies growing larger as the energyy flows through them, and they grow more powerful as the Force becomes strong with them. Like a river that flows faster, carving out a wider bed and depths out of the land for more water to pour in, continuing to grow larger... and never really stopped growing.

Rey had grown up (faster than her peers, now that she thought about it) hearing tales about the ancient Jedi heroines of old, in legacies stretching back thousands of years. Always the terminology in them was, well, big. Ancient masters whose gaze swept across entire countries in a single glance. Bold sages that stopped entire armies by simply stepping forward and standing very still so that none could advance. Mighty masters that were impossibly beautiful to behold, and when their figures where described, geological regions were often invoked to express sheer scale of their body shapes.

Those stories were old, Rey was patiently taught after she came to the Resistance and had the time to actually browse the archives, after they found a terminal big enough for her. The stories grew nearly as much as the old Jedi heroines had, and time passed, distorting the original lines so that they seemed to describe them. Master Depa Billaba, for instance; Rey always assumed that when tales spoke of her being taller than a mountain and with hips broader than city districts, it was metaphorical. Or Ayla Secura, the famous general of the Clone Wars; when her hair tendrils were said to be longer than entire rivers, it was an exaggeration.

And when Rey grew up, barely connected to the Force more than the average sentient and was over nine feet tall by the time Finn found her in Jakku, well. She assumed that human women just grew tall like that sometimes.

(Shmi, mother to Anakin Skywalker, was not a Jedi. But the Force ran in her blood and bone, rumbling through her thoughts. She always had a gift for knowing the minds of others, and her firm words could change all but the most unyielding of minds. When Qui-Gon Jinn and his apprentice came into her life, she was living in a barn and filling up most of it, her son fitting neatly into her hand. And Qui-Gon spoke with her, and when he left the world and took his son to freedom, he left her a holocron detailing the basics of communing with the force. And she learned. Within a month, she burst through the barn, growing too big to be contained, and she left for the desert to draw moisture out of the air, and lived with the sand people as one of their own. When her son came back, and slaughtered them in a fit of horrific misunderstanding, she turned her sight from him and mourned the boy he had been, and felt grief for what he could have become. Stories of Darth Vader reached her in time, and she recognized the violence of her son in this broken vessel of the dark.)

Rey let herself feel into the world around her. Felt the energy flow into her. She let herself become a vessel for the Force, she embraced it with mind and body, and she felt her inside sing as she grew. Her clothes needed to be constantly replaced as she grew upwards... and, worse for her sense of balance but better for her self-image, outwards. The extreme body types of the women called to the path of the Jedi Order were legend, if obfuscated through legends and stories failing to understand that literal prose was just that. Hulking amazonian bodies for mighty warriors dedicated to protecting planets. Impossibly curvaceous, motherly figures of sages devoted to nurturing the people of the galaxy.

In Rey's case, trying to keep under control breasts bigger than her torso and growing daily, energy flashing beneath her skin and between cupping fingers, it seemed that there was a bit of caregiver in her. Learning to walk with hips wider than your shoulders, or leap about with breasts massive enough to act as ballast would prove a challenging aspect of her training, in ages to come.

(Padme's size ought to have been a sign of who she was. Force sensitivity ran in her, deeply enough to recommend her for Jedi training, but she'd felt more duty to her homeland. And anyone who knew Padme had to wonder; how was she able to pass as a handmaid, and an ordinary woman as her double? But that was simple; she rarely appeared in public, and one of her own attendents was large enough to appear to be her. And no wonder that Anakin had been drawn to her, a woman even larger than his mother and requiring an exceptionally large ship to accommodate her; she'd first met him, holding him in her hands, and she'd sensed the power of him. Small wonder that, later in line, their children would become so powerful in the Force.

And Padme did not die. It would have been difficult, given the size difference between herself and her newborn children; she'd been a giant over ten years ago, and she'd only grown larger. She'd seen fit to have her children raised by other parents, her hopes for a family lost along with her hopes for Anakin. Duty, after all, was more important than what she wanted. She took on other names, an ever-changing identity as she roamed among the galaxy on behalf of the Rebel Alliance, keeping the memory of the Jedi alive and passing along what teachings she could remember. And she grew ever bigger, requiring more increasingly voluminous robes just to properly conceal the monstrously big curves that were a sure sign of her power.)

“Okay... take one step, try to stay steady. Make sure no one's underfoot. Back straight to compensate for the weight, and... hold on.” Rey stopped in mid-step, a foot larger than a man, swaddled in white fabric and pausing over people's heads. People paused to look up at her. Rey took up most of the street, her body occupying most of their visible perception, and those in front of her couldn't see her upper body past the sheer size of her breasts. Behind her, the same applied from her backside, even with a robe loosely hanging from her like a banner from a capital palace. Depending on the angle, a fairly slim waist like the join of an hourglass might have been visible.

She was sweating, telekinetically holding herself still and flowing into the minds of everyone around her to make sure of their position so she didn't hurt anyone. Without thinking about it, she tweaked the front of her robe, showing just a bit more cleavage. For reasons she wasn't clear on, yet, she quite liked showing off just how busty she was even if her bust was already so large that the curve of her chest was enough for Finn and Poe to both stand in, with much room to spare. She barely needed to open her robe at all, her breasts practically forced it open.

She was wondering about that too. She liked having a body like this, and contemplated what it said about her.

“There's no one in front of you,” Finn said, eyes set dead ahead. An inkling of gentlemanly steel, not so much instilled as deliberately battered into himself, compelled him to look at anywhere but Rey. Her entire body was so... curvy that simply acknowledging her size felt like an unforgivable act of pure lewdness. Considering her size, this left him with little option but to stare at the ground and trying to deal with her clumsy attempts at flirtiness.

“There's you.”

“I'm walking beside you.” And well out of range of her step, he added to himself. He would have preferred being closer to her – being away from Rey felt unpleasant and made him anxious – but this made her feel more secure, less like she was about to step on him. “That counts. I think?”

“Mmm,” she mumbled, looking up pensively. Consciously or not, she was walking with a bit of wiggle to her hips, producing an interesting wobble effect in her robes. Considering that her backside was at least large enough to be nearly as high as her arms, there was a lot of room for it.

Finn swallowed. Just being near her was... narcotic. There'd been First Order stories about this sort of thing; twisted things talking about how the Jedi wizards and witches could get into your head, twist your mind and make you believe things you didn't want to. That you needed them to think right. Rey didn't make him feel like he was having new thoughts slipped in at all. Rey made him feel like, like...

He dared to glance up. She looked down, face turning around over a shoulder and the outwards curve of her bust, past the thickness of her arm. Her waist alone was higher than the buildings, her body occupying so much space that the road was cleared for her. He could stand on her palm, she was just that much bigger than him, he had to look so small compared to her-

She smiled; trying to look brave. He swallowed, just as a wave flowed into him; tangled thoughts weaving nastily into the core of his stomach, his heart beating too fast, what if I'm a disappointment to the General-

His own face flowed into memory that was not his. Rey smiled again, staring at him, and those foreign feelings, bits of Rey's mind, peeled away from him into calm and steady beats. “Finn?” She mumbled briefly. “Do you mind if I pick you up?”

“What? Um. No?”

She moved very quickly, almost indecently. A hand stretched out over him, fingers spreading wise and closing eagerly around him. The weight of her, the smell and warmth of her, encircled him as she held him close to her chest, and she breathed in, and out, sighing contentedly. “You sure you don't mind?”

“No,” He managed, desperately trying not to squeak or be uncool in any way.

Emboldened, Rey kept walking, an extra swing in her stride, hips moving this way and that, people on the street looking up at her as the city shook slightly with her tread. Above them, the sky blinked, clouds dimming slightly. But then neither of them had been looking up, and the people of D'Qar had adjusted to the sight of the General by now. Rey, with Finn in hand, came to an open square mostly occupied by a large cargo carrier, just big enough for her.

Poe was waiting for them both there. He saluted them cheerfully, with perhaps a hint of joke in it; she was pretty sure you weren't supposed to salute people that weren't actually serving. Or he might have been shading his eyes. “Hey, you two!” He indicated the open doors of the cargo. “You two ready to meet General Organa?”

“No,” Rey said, because she didn't know any way other than blunt. “But I suppose it's a bit late to back down?”

“I still say running is a valid idea,” Finn said, voice a touch muffled. “It's something that never goes out of fashion.”

“You can't run from General Organa,” Poe said dryly. “She'll just grab you.” He pointed teasingly at Finn. “See, like that but.. a lot more people.” He grinned. “No one complains then, either.”

Rey knew of Leia Organa, but she didn't actually know what she looked like, and it hadn't occurred to her yet to think about what happened when a powerful Jedi and a woman force-sensitive enough to require a gigantic ship just to travel in comfort had a daughter. Rey climbed into the ship, having to crouch down just to fit, and Poe got into the pilot's seat. It was currently pointed up, with the ship tilting over with her weight. A pair of anti-gravity discs fired up at the sides, and the ship floated into the air. The box-shaped affair floated serenely up, angling itself at a much larger construction high over the Resistance base.

Finn peeked out a window at it, Rey leaning over to do the same. Finn thought it was amazingly big, arcing high into the sky with a minamalistic approach to structure, supposing that it was the meeting room of the Resistance's leaders. Rey, who took a rather more unsophisticated approach, thought it looked like a wedge. But a really, really tall and gilded wedge.

The ship flew up it's side, going high over the buildings. Rey looked down, interested to see the base properly from above; she hadn't had the chance to see it on her arrival. The people blurred away into a great shifting mass, and then the buildings went next, seeming to her to look like a child's click-together toys. The overall shape of the base became clearer, as they got higher she thought it also looked like a kind of wedge, or...

Yes. The whole base was a thin slice of construction, between two shapes so massive she hadn't even really seen them at all on the ground. They'd just looked like part of the horizon. Mountains, she supposed, but bigger than anything she'd ever seen; round, smooth, projecting outwards in a way that seemed very... familiar.

Rey frowned. She'd seen something like that before. They were climbing up, and she looked upwards, and their ship was a little dot between the two round mountains that eclipsed the base like an ant besides a cart. Clouds were drifting by, and she still could not see the top of the mountains. They were just so big...

Finn was frowning too. He'd spent a good amount of time being clasped to Rey's stomach, looking straight up, and he'd seen sights exactly like this. A suspicion was starting to dawn, especially with the stories the Order had spread about the terrifying General Organa-

They had mounted over the meeting structure, though, and Poe announced that they were docking, and neatly bopped down to a brief stop. Rey stepped out, Finn still in her grip, and onto a platform of sorts, surrounded by guard rails high enough even for her. “This way!” Poe called, looking like a doll in a grown woman's carriage. Rey followed out, still looking around. The base could barely be seen, it was just completely eclipsed by those massive round mountains all around, going into the sea and above to the clouds. She glanced down at her own bust, frowning; the view looked so familiar.

“Lucky you,” Poe said as the three of them stepped onto the platform and it automatically rode upwards, moving at a steady pace. “Most people meet with the General though holograms, but she really wanted to meet you in person. I guess she's taken a shine to you.”

“But... where is she?” Rey asked, looking around. “Is she waiting on some kind of fortress above us?”

“No. She's right here.” Poe aimed at the enormous walls – fleshed colored, heaving slightly, as with breath – around them. “All around us. Right now.”

“...Oh! Is she a, a force spirit?”

Poe gave her a look. “Uh. No? She's alive. Just... just wait a bit, okay?”

They kept going upwards. Rey hummed to herself, mostly to pass the time, but couldn't help noticing how regular the walls were. They were the biggest things she'd ever seen – the base itsef was barely a speck at this point – and she'd wondered how they had been built-

They broke, suddenly, into what ought to have been sunlight but a massive shape above them blocked the way. There was sunlight, filtered, and Rey saw clouds drifting around them, they were very high up now. She looked around, then down, feeling a surge of vertigo, and stopped. She looked down, and suddenly understood.

She was staring down, into her breasts and cleavage. She was also staring down into the two 'walls' she had passed through, the base at the bottom of them. The view was, except for the scale, the same thing.

Those weren't walls at all.

And Rey looked up into the vast shape above, and she saw a face. The stern but kind expression of General Leia Organa – barely aged at all, so much of the Force in her that she seemed unable to age at all – gazed down at her, on a face bigger than entire geographic regions. Eyes the size of seas, nose that was measured in miles, lips thicker around than entire countries were big, and Rey saw slender shoulders just a bit hunched, suggestions of a formal attire suited to her station, and two even bigger rising swells behind her, eclipsing even the rest of her.

Leia's backside, so big that it made all else of her look small.

And Rey had just spent several days literally in Leia's cleavage and hadn't known it. Rey looked down again, at those massive walls that she now realized to be unbelievably massive breasts, and back to Leia's face. Yes, there was definitely a slight hint of a smirk on those lips.

And Leia spoke to her, a hand rising up to cup Leia's own jaw with a challenging tilt. “It's good to meet you,” Leia said, but she did not speak aloud. Her voice would have been a force of nature on its own, demolishing whole cities with a single word, instead her voice simply arrived in Rey's mind without bothering with speech.

Rey gaped, and managed a nervous nod. “Y-yes, ma'am!”

Leia snorted. “I think we can dispense with the formal talk, miss Rey. If you would?” She shifted aside, and one massive breast was slightly pressed down, and something approached, a wide and smooth shape nearing, and Rey realized it was a hand.

A hand bigger than a city came close, beckoningly, and Rey cautiously stepped onto a finger, and onwards to the palm, and was soon lifted up, to speak more closely.

(And the final question remained. If Leia, or Shmi or Padme, Force Sensitives who were never properly trained, grew to be so large...

How big would Rey, the most powerful Jedi in recent history, possibly become?)

#/#//#///#////#/////#queued #my writing #fics #star wars #leia #rey #repost #originally from my old blog!

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reyloday · 7 years ago

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Enchanted

Pairing: Rey/Kylo Ren Rating: T Word Count: 2,012 Additional Tags: Canonverse, Episode IX, Naboo, First Kiss, “Platonic” Getaways Summary: He was here with her, had joined her on Naboo after almost a year of physical separation. Rey knew she shouldn’t want him close, crave his affection like she does, but their connection was something beyond all logic. Beyond what either of them could understand. [Or, in which Rey and Ben have some alone time on Naboo]

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Naboo was unlike other place Rey had been to her entire life, though that list was entirely too short for her liking. She didn’t know much of the place, but by looks alone she fell completely and utterly in love with it. It wasn’t even just the greenery or the flowers or the air that led her to this conclusion—it was just the general aura of the place, how it felt compared to every other planet she’d been to in the entire galaxy.

Ben tried to act like he didn’t notice, but she knew him better than anyone else, perhaps himself sometimes. His indifference didn’t work on her, even if it seemed that he couldn’t think in anything but extremes. When broached about the topic, though, he just shrugged her off and any association with the place. Rey could sense something, though, some kind of connection that Ben hadn’t willingly given up yet. She’d get it out of him eventually, even if that would take a bit of prying..

Of all the things Rey liked about Naboo’s physical beauty, the stars were most definitely near the very top of the list. They shined in the sky, a contrast like no other in the galaxy, completely incomparable. That was the reason she spent most of her time out here now, on a balcony of some sort in different positions on the estate they were staying on.

This time Rey occupied one connected to a bedroom, perfectly overlooking the gardens. She sat on the edge of the balcony several meters up from the ground and just allowed herself to embrace the faintest chill in the air. One ill-timed fall and it could be over for the last Jedi in the galaxy. Not the exciting death anyone in the galaxy would have expected.

It had been a few days since Rey had left the Resistance, feigning urgent “Jedi missions” to keep everyone from asking questions, but Leia knew. She always knew, yet she never tried to stop her, probably knowing that nothing could stop Rey from seeing her son, not even the constraints of time and space.

“Rey?”

His voice should’ve startled her, but it didn’t. She could feel it now, felt his presence and mind like it was an extension of her own. It was one of the other reasons she loved it here more than anything: him.

“I made you tea.”

He was here with her, had joined her on Naboo after almost a year of physical separation. Rey knew she shouldn’t want him close, crave his affection like she does, but their connection was something beyond all logic. Beyond what either of them could understand.

Ben sat down a respectable distance from her on the edge of the balcony and put the steaming mug between them. There was another mug in his own hand, which he sipped gingerly as they stared out into the horizon.

She took the mug and pressed her hand into the heat as she sipped it. “It’s good. What is it?”

“Chandrilan. My mother made it for me when she could. It helped me sleep. Probably the reason she made it, honestly.”

Rey took another sip before setting it back down between them. “Were you a crazy kid?”

A shrug. “Not really. I was pretty quiet, honestly, but I guess I was just hard to deal with. You know, with the Force and all that.”

“I can’t imagine having to deal with the Force as a child. It must’ve been insane.”

“It was okay. Didn’t help that my dad didn’t really understand it, but there were worse things, I’m sure.” He took another sip of his tea, more like a swig actually, and Rey had a feeling he was wishing for something stronger. “But you know, it’s not like I’m totally messed up or anything now so surely I was fine.”

The statement made Rey laugh despite how she tried to stop herself. “We’re… both messed up in our own right. Don’t be so hard on yourself, Ben.”

He nodded, ducking his head, but Rey could see the slight smile on his lips. “Right.”

She hummed and took another sip of her tea, enjoying the comfortable silence surrounding them. It had been like this for the days they’d been on Naboo. They were at ease with each other, unlike the last time they saw each other in person. Sure, their bond had given them time together, but it was different. Rey didn’t like the abrupt entrances, and, even more, she didn’t like it when he left.

Together they’d explored most the estate, from the dining room to the furthest point in the garden, but Rey found herself enjoying the lounge more than anything. That was where they ended up most nights, his head on her lap in front of the fire as they just sat and existed in the blank canvas of the world. There they weren’t the last Jedi and the Supreme Leader. There they were just two people who realized that they never wanted to be apart again.

“The stars sure are beautiful tonight,” Ben said next to her, eyes on the sky and the expansive terrain of the galaxy just in front of them. It was there they both had to be somebody, thrust into duties of conflicting interests. “I can imagine that’s why my grandmother loved it here so much.”

Rey glanced over at him. “Grandmother?”

“She owned this estate many years ago, practically considered a deity on this planet, actually.”

“Padmé Amidala.” She’d seen the portraits of the woman in the hall but hadn’t made the connection to Ben at all. Of course…

He nodded. “My grandparents fell in love here. Nobody really knows that except for me and some of the older staff here. Her association with Anakin Skywalker was a fairly well-kept secret, and after a while it didn’t even matter.”

“How did she die?”

“My grandfather killed her.” It sounded almost nonchalant, but not quite. Rey fell completely silent at the words, not daring to look over at him. “It was after… he turned. It’s not a fun story, so I’ll spare you the details.”

So that was the story behind it all. That was why Ben walked around here like he was in a daze, why his eyes lingered on the simplest of things, why he seemed at peace even in the turmoil going on around them.

In an effort to break the silence stretching on, Rey spoke. “Sometimes on Jakku I’d sit out a night and stare at the sky and just wonder if there was any point in me existing if there was so many other people, so many other places. I didn’t understand then.”

He looked over at her, hand pressed into the stone of the balcony. It was during times like these that she noticed just how young he looked but how tired as well. The man had seen things no one his age should have, no one any age should have, but yet he was here, and he was beautiful and strong, and he was going to show anyone who ever doubted him.

“Do you now?”

She nodded once. “I think I do, better at least. I’ve never really had a purpose outside of scavenging. I’m not some Jedi hero or some Resistance princess. I’m not this ethereal being that everyone seems to have an image of, but at least I do have an image now. I have a purpose now.”

“You do. We all have purposes. It just takes some people longer to find theirs. Life isn’t clear cut and simple. It sometimes take some messing with to get right.”

Rey took her mug into her hand and lifted it to her lips to take a sip before setting it down. “Indeed, Ben, I think you’re right.”

“When am I not?”

She reached across and shoved him lightly, something he could’ve easily stopped if he wanted to. “Shut your damn mouth.”

Eyes narrowed, Ben leaned toward her, a smirk playing on his lips. Rey loved when he got like this, when he dropped his serious persona and just let himself fall victim to childish games. It was a refreshing glimpse of who he was before maybe after this war hardened him, after Snoke got to him. “Make me.”

“I would, but we both know that would never work, so I don’t see the point in trying. Do you?”

“You might want to rethink your technique.”

Gods, he was so close now. Rey couldn’t hide the heat rising to her cheeks at his face mere inches from hers. She couldn’t stop herself from looking him up and down and letting her eyes settle on his lips. Those lips. There weren’t many nights she didn’t think of them now, doing things that she could never voice aloud.

Rey opened her mouth to try and speak, but her voice caught in her throat. Ben fell silent as well, breathing even halting as his eyes bore into hers. Usually she was able to read them, tell what he was thinking and feeling immediately, but there was nothing but one strange look.

It was like they were stuck in time and space, the universe gluing them to their place. Rey couldn’t find it in herself to move away, naturally gravitating forward. Her lip quivered as fear pierced her heart, the thought of rejection once more as she finally allowed herself to grow close again.

Except that feeling never came, not even as their lips met for the very first time.

Rey couldn’t recall who initiated it, but in hindsight it didn’t really matter. The only thing that was important now was the way his lips felt against her, how soft and pliant they were. It was painstakingly slow but time seemed to speed up all the same. Somehow, somewhere, this would’ve been more simple, wouldn’t have had to have an entire galaxy tearing them apart.

“Ben,” she whispered after a moment, pulling away just barely to the point their noses brushed.

Even if Rey had just barely pulled away, Ben completely straightened up. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Ben—”

“No, don’t say anything. I know you don’t feel for me in that way. You don’t have to confirm what I already know to be true.”

This man. Without giving him a chance to say another word, Rey grabbed him by the jaw and pulled him down to kiss her this time. It was sloppy, rough, unpracticed, but it was worth it to feel him again, feel the perfection of his lips on hers.

It wasn’t long before he pulled away again, breathing heavily as he stared at her. Rey could feel the blush crawling to her cheeks, but the lighting was dim enough that she doubted he could see even if he tried. “Are you okay?”

“Honestly? No.” Ben let out a loose breath before turning to her. “Will you do that again?”

“So romantic,” she muttered under her breath right before their lips met again.

This time he didn’t pull away. It was an unfamiliar sensation, but his lips slotted so perfectly with hers somehow, and Rey found herself never ever wanting to let go of him again. “Gods help me,” she mumbled against him.

Ben choked sat his hand down to keep himself from falling—right on Rey’s tea. Even as the mug fell to the ground and shattered, Ben’s swearing breaking the silence between them, Rey could feel it:

Peace.

The feeling didn’t escape her as Ben wiped the hot tea off his hand or they found their way into the lounge they’d taken a particular liking to. It didn’t escape her as he pressed her into the chaise and felt the warmth of his body against hers. It didn’t escape her as Ben found his way into her side, allowing Rey to hold him until the sun rose again.

For now, it was just them and Naboo, the stars and the galaxy. A war—physical and mental—temporarily forgotten for the utter transcendence of peace.

#reylo #reylo fic

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kenrik · 7 years ago

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Conflicted - that was what I felt after my first viewing of TLJ.

My journey from “???” to “WTF!!”. Comparing my insight from my first viewing of TLJ to my second.

1. I am Reylo shit. But after watching TLJ, I couldn’t process what I’d just seen. I felt like there was nothing bridging the gap from “You’re a monster!” to “Let’s work together, Ben Solo~” So, I thought, initially, that their relationship was poorly constructed. And, I felt conflicted because - although I would love Reylo to happen, I didn’t want it to happen in a mucked up sort of way.

2. The first scene - the bombing scene. I couldn’t understand it. Where the hell did those vessels come from? Who the hell was that woman. And why the hell do we care about the medallion around her neck? Just - who the faq?

3. Poe is an idiot. A dolt. A trigger happy fool. (A stark contrast to his soundness from TFA.)

4. Then, after the first scene - I guess everything happened and my brain went haywire - thinking - W.T.F.????!!!??? My brain proceeded to shutdown afterwards, I think. And just let the images pass.

5. Holdo’s sacrifice was very cliche. Best sacrifice scene for me was Lelouch’s. Going back to it, I guess anime’s sacrificial themes make western ones pale in comparison. Anyway, I didn’t appreciate this scene so much - even with the spectacular cinematography - because it was what it is - cliche. Also, there would be zero casualties other than herself. I mean, as far as logic went - anyone with half a brain would’ve done what she did. “It’s only logical.” lol

6. Too many jokes. Hux became a punchline which I found annoying. I felt it was forced (lol). Also, the recurring about Poe being trigger happy - wanting to bomb everything in sight. That was just, very cringeworthy. (And I understand why they did it, though. Curse you Marvel! And your many jokes! DAMN-IT.)

7. Luke’s snarkiness. Maybe I need a refresher course on his character. Last we saw him, he’s been battling with incredible shit as a kid. Then now, we jump to his old master type guy who smirks a lot... BRIDGE. THE. GAP.

8. Kylo Ren - the GIGANTIC. PAIN IN THE ASS. CRYBABY. One of the reasons I left the movie house utterly conflicted was this character. When I though he had progressed (somewhat) - he goes reverse psycho mode and losses all his shit - and with it, all that development he made in the middle part of the film. As a Kylo Ren buff - this was incredibly frustrating to say the least.

8.5 Rey’s constant rejection of Kylo Ren. But who can blame her?? That guy’s a mess! One of the reasons I left the movie house conflicted was Kylo’s flipflopping character development. By the end - I was like - of course she’d leave you - you’re an idiot! Two rejections in one movie plus that one rejection in TFA... how many times does Rey have to reject you before you clean your act up, stupid Ren?! I felt angry and sad for Kylo, for being conflicted, lost, close to something certain, solid, then all out batshit crazy and lost and conflicted again. It was a rollercoaster for me and my rooting for Ben Solo’s character. Damn did that guy take me for a ride.

9. Phasma v Finn scene. Phasma is an incredible baddie. I loved their fight scene. My comment is, though, - that it was minute. Ever so tiny. And her “death” was so anticlimactic - I can’t even. It was cliche. The fight could have been longer.

10. Finn and Rose - IDIOTS. What were those two thinking sharing their plans to an absolute stranger?? And they get shocked that the thief sold them out the first chance he got. Seriously - their whole subplot was like stepping on dogshit. I get the message the team wanted to bring across. But seriously, that same message could’ve been said with a better subplot. There was no answer as to who the man with the rose pin was - no recall to the past story, to any story in SW. Use the old characters for some substance! We have so many more of them at the team’s disposal. :/

Cookies (Parts I loved since the first viewing.)

1. Leia is kween. That force stunt she pulled was epic. It was incredible. I can’t even. (Proves to show you how strong she is with the force - and FU fanboys whining - “The force ain’t werq dat wei betch!”) 2. Luke and his liberal approach to the force. Preach!! 3. Rose’s message about weapon dealers (AKA AMERICA, RUSSIA, CHINA. H8CHU FUCKERS - fighting each other when you’re basically on the same fucking boat - HU U THINK UR FOOLING). 3.5 Rose hitting deserter Finn with a stunbaton/gun. 4. That immaculate contrast of white and red minerals. 5. BB8 DOING ALL THE WORK IN ROSE and FINN’S ARC. I mean - GIVE THE DAMN DROID/ROBOT AN OSCAR! 6. Rey’s druggy self-discovery scene. That was just crazy good. 7. The bitchy fish nuns. 8. Chewie roasting porgs while porgs watch in tearful horror. 9. Luke’s leap from one hill to the next. 10. Ben’s slide/glide when he first talks to Rey via force bond. 10.25 Rey’s incessant bitching to Ren via force bond about how Ben is a monster. How she beat him. How she found Luke before him. How she beat him. How he’s a loser. How he’s an idiot. How she hates him. (During that scene, I just can’t help but laugh at her intense lashing out at him HAHA) 10.5 Rey shooting Ren the first opportunity she got. 10.75 Ren standing in the bridge? looking at the platform thing? And Ren being all savage and unforgiving and shooting the fighter planes of the resistance. 11. Snoke’s labyrinth scene!!!!*#*#JMNFUWNF!!!*@(#*$ 12. Epic Yoda is epic. I watched the film with my blockmates, impromptu right after our last finals exam. His quote "Failure is the best teacher.” literally made us ball out in tears. DAMN IT. Yoda got us again! “Do or do not, there is no try.” is so good it’s unfair. 13. Kylo ren practically throwing a tantrum when he faced his uncle Luke. 14. “You came from nothing.You are nothing... But not to me.” 15. Luke’s deep backwards dip in his face off with his nephew Ben. 16. Hux’s screaming repeat of Ben’s order to proceed, earning a “dafuq” look from Kylo. 17!!! Kylo Ren and Anakin = obvious blatant parallels! The hair, the attire, the anger in their expressions!

My SECOND VIEWING gave me clarity. So, here is my feedback after not having been taken by a shitload of surprise. 1. The scenes had okay pacing. Just unnoticeable because a lot was shoved to our face in less than three hours. 2. Finn/Rose subplot was meh, not exactly the worst thing in the world. And, it makes sense that they get that type of subplot. Rose was a low-ranking member, delegated to catching deserters. Finn knows next to nothing about the Resistance. And Poe is a loose canon. Of course the quest they’d end up in is only as good as what their character’s can make up. This is very realistic actually. 3. It’s a kid’s movie. Of course it would be riddled with cliches. 4. Vulnerability - that’s what bridged the gap between Rey and Ren. 5. Captain Phasma is coming back! *hopefully* She deserves a better send off! 6. Kylo Ren’s character development. I was devastated after my first viewing. I thought he had regressed to the point of no return. Man, I was so ready to throw all my Reylo hopes away because dammit if an idiot ends up with Rey. But, I failed to appreciate that last scene between them properly.

Ren is kneeling, head bowing low in remorse. And Rey were eyes hard and unforgiving, her expression, swelling in disappointment of him. Wow. That said a lot. This is a huge step. After Rey left him (wow it’s like leaving a lover after having had sex), Ren just catapults himself into a raging fit. How could he not? How could he not lose all of his shit after having LOST ALL HIS SHIT. HAHA (Shit is such a good placeholder for the dumb.) I mean - he just killed his Supreme Leader. He offered his heart out to Rey - to this stranger. For once in his life, nothing had been clearer to him - he wanted to join forces with Rey. Forget everyone else. So long as she joined him, nothing would ever be unattainable. But she rejected him. And then - he lost all his shit. He was so certain for once - that Rey would join him. That she saw the same future he saw of her, of them, standing together towards the same goal. With her rejection - he was thrown back to confusion. To that irrational conflict he could never make sense of. Everything that happened after was an intense blur that he could do nothing more but work in automatic mode. And his automatic mode is work like a bitch baby. Imagine this - everything happened so fast after than one moment of clarity - The resistance found a safe haven. The Millennium Falcon was shooting at them. And that one person he’s been searching for all his life resurfaces out of thin air. All the lies that Snoke told him, all the hatred that scum put in his mind, just exploded.

Everything happened so quickly. He had no second to think straight. He went to what was natural - what Snoke taught him. Which is why~ that moment of realization at the end, of regret, remorse, guilt - towards Rey, towards this person who seemed to genuinely believe in him - is so important. It makes me believe that he’ll be thinking of his actions more rationally. And this makes me happy for my favorite character.

A lot have said this, but I think a year or a few will pass in the timeline before we rejoin the characters. We’ve seen their conflict. Now, we’ll see them in their fullest form - allowing for the ultimate battle. This, I’m really excited for. And I give zero fucks whether or not Kylo will be good or bad. I just want him to know who he is and what he is fighting for. And for the briefest moment, we saw it in TLJ - the death of the past - of the Republic and of the Jedi Order - and hopefully of the ashes of the Empire - the First Order.

TLJ was a really good film. I can’t say it was a really good SW film, but it was an incredible film. You haters need to get your shit together and progress with everyone else. Also, I hate you all for crying Mary Sue on Rey. We women had to deal with countless Mary Sue men in our blockbusters. Now we have one of our own, you’re bitch crying at Disney. FU.

Stay calm. Stay chill. KenRik.

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diaryofanobsessivefangirl · 7 years ago

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Masterlist of Ships Subtropes

Dynamic tropes

Puppy love

Romance between children.

Examples: Gendry x Arya, Arnold x Helga, Mike x Eleven, Shaoran x Sakura

Childhood Acquaintance

They meet when they were children, regardless of the frequency or how close they were. They may have been raised together, may have saw each other every now and then, or even just once.

Used to be Friends

Examples: Petyr x Catelyn; Erik x Christine; Mina x Lucy

Used to be Lovers

Couples that were officially together (At least had sex) before everything went to hell. Ships that only flirted, such as Anna/David (The Guest) and Jackson/Lisa (Red Eye) are not included.

Examples: Athos x Milady; Tom x Elizabeth (The Blacklist); Dolores x William

Love Makes You Evil

A character who was originally good but did things for love that turn him to the dark side.

Examples: Anakin, Petyr Baelish and Claude Frollo

Love Makes You Crazy

A character driven to the brick of sanity because of love.

Example: Claude Frollo from Notre Dame de Paris and Ram from Princess Daisy

Not So Different After All

Opposites/rivals/enemies that actually have many hidden similarities. They are canonically each other’s shadow and are compared as two sides of the same coin.

Example: Anne x Vincent, Steerpike x Fuchsia, Kylo x Rey, Jackson x Lisa

Love Beyond Death

Meeting in the after-life, meeting reincarnation or person coming back from the dead.

Example: Catherine x Heathcliff, Petyr x Catelyn, Dracula x Mina, Naraku x Kikyo

Dragging You to the Gutter with Me

A villain turns a heroine into a brutal lonely broken thing only he can understand what it’s like to be, and still she won’t come to him. So what keeps them together is also what keeps them apart. Read more.

Example: Naraku and Kikyo; Alina and Darkling; Petyr and Catelyn; Dolores and William

In Love with the Mark

A man who works for some really big, bad guys. He may or not believe in their ideology; that is not the point. He is there for the money and he prides himself of his professionalism. For some reason, this organization working on the shadows have “business” to deal with this ordinary everyday woman. So he is hired to stalk, threaten, or even kill her. Turns out, Stalking is Love, and he develops feelings for his target. That doesn’t stop him from keeping up with the job, thought. He had to be undercover to get closer, so cases of Used to be Lovers/Friends are probably included. You will likely hear from a character In Love With the Mark the quote “It wasn’t personal.”

Example: Jack/Angela; Jackson/Lisa; Vincent/Anne; Tom/Lizzie (Jacob/Masha); Skye/Ward

The Queen and her Champion

Woman occupies traditionally feminine roles of power and the man is an example of masculinity for others. She uses clever words, social understanding and schemes. He is her sword and her armor, but nothing more. Because of their different stances, he is bound to be close to her he protects, but never with her.

Examples: Maly and Alina; Zelda and Link; Lancelot and Guinevere; Rhaenyra Targaryen and Criston Cole; Daenerys and Ser Jorah; Every Elizabeth Tudor romance, Queen Anne and Aramis; Lucrezia and Cesare; Cersei and Jaime.

Art Inspires Love

When character A realizes or falls (more) in love with character B after watching him dance, sing, or doing something artistic.

Examples: Frollo/Esmeralda, Christine/Erik, Hap/Prairie, Isaura/Leôncio, Anne/Vincent, Sandor/Sansa and Babydoll/Blue Jones.

Supernatural Connection

The characters have a psychic or physical connection. Maybe they can communicate through telepathy or can feel each other’s presence and emotions when they are nearby. There might be a spell connecting their hearts in a way one can only die when the other one does. Maybe they are twins. Whatever the reason, these characters are bonded in a way no one else could be.

Examples: Kylo x Rey, Nuada x Nuala, Darkling x Alina and Cersei x Jaime.

The Frollo Effect

A guy falls in love with a girl he is suppose to reject, repulse or dehumanize, and fights against it. By trying to suppress it, her converts love into hatred against her and himself, and probably punishes both hoping it will make the feeling go away. It does not work and the guy starts doing things he never thought he was capable of in order to deal with this unbearable need. He is usually proud, rational and very in control of himself until she comes along. Her initial dismissal as a suitor commonly starts out as social expectation - in which the characters are from divergent social segments and ideologically separated -, but it’s always a expectation the guy has over himself, regardless if anyone else imposes this on him.

Examples: Esmeralda x Frollo (Gypsy and priest), Amon x Helen (Jew and nazi), Isaura x Leôncio (Slave and master), Daisy x Ram (Sister and brother), William x Dolores (Host and guest) and Hap x Prairie (Subject and scientist)

Bonding undercover

When the bad guy pretends to be a normal person long enough to befriend the good girl and make her fall in love with him. This is usually how tragically two-sided vxh happens, because she gets to know his other side before the bad one gets in the way, but they can still have a happy ending because it also establishes they could have the base for a healthy relationship if only he could abandon his malicious quest. This only happens when the girl develops deeply romantic feelings for him; if it's only a crush or devilish attraction (Red Eye, The OA and Agents of SHIELD) than it doesn't count. She must be sobbing on the floor when this is done. May also involve an amnesia period in which the antagonist approaches the hero as an old friend or a lover.

Examples: Steerpike and Fuchsia, Christine and Erik, Kiara and Kovu, Elizabeth and Tom, Dracula and Vanessa

Generation Parallel

A love story doesn’t end up well. Years later another generation repeats the first one in a slightly different manner. Most of the time, the parallel between the two affairs means the characters from the first one have the chance to develop as we wished they would, and that their love might have grown roots under a different field. Sometimes it just means shit happens no matter the circumstances, and that people will make the same mistakes of their elderlies despite that they should have known better by now. If we are talking about the first generation’s offspring (Incest not necessarily included), it might mean their love is on their DNA and they would fall over and over again under different names and places. In any case, this trope is the romantic side of History Repeats Itself.

Very common theme in incest, because their birth requires a previous affair between their parents, but it only counts if it is a story on its own, full of ups and downs, and people talk about it. If it’s not mentioned or important to the plot, there is no point in calling it Generation Parallel.

Examples: Jaime and Cersei (Joana and Tywin), Arya and Gendry/Jon (Lyanna and Robert/Rhaegar), Catherine and Hareton (Cathy and Heathcliff), Abby and Henry (Wakefield and Sarah), Rey and Kylo (Padme and Anakin), Isaura and Leôncio (Almeida and Juliana), Leonardo e Marina (Pilar e Murilo).

Roaring Rampage of Romance

Love that starts a war and the main plot. Characters that destroy cities and galaxies because Love Made Them Evil, because they are trying to be with whom they love or to secure their safety and happiness. It might be on purpose, in which they have foreseen the consequences but choose to take them anyway as a means to an end, or it was accidental. There may be decades of conflict and the count of a hundred corpses, or maybe a famous massacre with a handful dead extras. Maybe a murderer is hunting down everyone on an Island so that he can be alone with his beloved. Anyway, innocent people that had nothing to do with them nor interfered with the couple’s happiness will suffer the collateral damage.

Common trope among royalty, since marrying or bearing the children of someone you were not supposed to could have disastrous consequences to the State, still people would do it for love.

If the character is causing the rampage in search for something else, like power, and to secure his beloved is an incidental bonus, it isn’t considered Roaring Rampage of Romance, unless he is doing it because Love Has Made Him Evil. Alina/Darkling and Nuada/Nuala, for instance, don’t fit this category.

Examples: Penny Dreadful, Inuyasha, ASoIaF (Rhaegar x Lyanna, Jaime x Cersei, Petyr x Catelyn), Harper’s Island, Westworld, Notre Dame de Paris, Wuthering Heights, The Phantom of the Opera, Bram Stroker’s Dracula, Apollo and Cassandra, Star Wars (Anakin and Padmé)

Taboo Tropes

Incest

Self-explanatory. Cousins will not be considered incest in here. I’m brazilian.

Subtrope: Decadent Aristocrats

Ho Yay

Homosexual couples

Age gap

Ships with age gap between then, 10 years at least. Supernatural/immortal beings won’t be taken into account unless the other part is a child or coming of age.

Wife Husbandry

A man adopts or temporarily takes care of a little girl. She may or not develop a precocious crush on him. Little girl grows up into a extraordinary and desirable woman. She had him on a pedestal all these years and has been saving herself for him. Man is distressed bc he can’t reconcile the image of the child he cherished as a father and the provoking woman she turned out to be. He mostly resists her advances, but they work that out by the end.

Example: Older!Mathilda/Leon AU, Nancy/Hartigan (Sin City), Veronica/William (Final Girl)

Development Tropes

End game ship

Is not everyday an OTP becomes end game

AU ship

A.k.a. “Canon? Who needs canon?” ships. OTPs that had a lot of potential but were ruined by canon. So either I ignore the end they were given, either some parts in the middle. Unlike Not Canon ships, these were meant to be romantically involved, but the way it was executed ruined it.

Secondary Interest ship

That One Scene ships are the ones with nothing shippable except for one or two scenes. Sometimes is not even canon and are more anti-recs than anything, but it’s still about villain x heroine, so it’s relevant to this blog.

Not canon

Word of God stayed silent and, according to my best judgment, the subtext was not enough. If something sexual or romantic happens between the characters but isn’t based on desire, such as the villain seducing the heroine for his advantage, it’s not canon.

Example: Scream (Billy/Sidney), Kim Possible (Kim/Shego), Mulan (Mulan x Shan Yu), World Without End (Carys x Edward), Sky High (Layla x Warren), Star Wars (Obi-Wan x Padmé), Richard III (Anne x Richard), Tesis (Angela x Bosco)

#List #Management

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swfanficbyjz · 7 years ago

Text

SW AU - Fate of the Master Chapter 15

<- Previous Chapter

Months passed and Anakin stayed with Hondo as they slowly gathered another crew. He started going by the code name, Maelstrom and traded his red lightsaber out for a couple blasters.

Ohnaka was an odd pirate, he wouldn't go so far as to call him a good man, but he did seem to have a code of principles he lived by. Anakin allowed himself to turn a blind eye to their questionable dealings, since the captain didn't like to kill. At least not in cold blood. Once, long before the war, this band of pirates would have been a cause for the Jedi to shut down. But those days were long gone. Even with all the fear of the empire; piracy, smuggling and black market dealings flourished. It really amazed him how adaptable and persistent they were. He'd never really given much thought to what motivated people.

When he'd first joined Hondo's crew, he would have said credits was their highest motivation. But now after dozens of missions with them, he was starting to see it differently. They weren't really that different from anyone else, they just wanted to live a life full of pleasure and happiness. The Weequay pirates knew how to party better than anyone he'd ever met. He remembered the first time he discovered that.

Him and Obi wan had been sent to make a deal with Ohnaka to capture count Dooku and bring him back to the republic to face trial for war crimes. Hondo had invited them to join his crew for a feast; good food, good drinks, plenty of entertainment. But apparently him and Obi wan couldn't hold their drinks, and they'd ended up as another bargaining chip. They'd tried to escape multiple times, but failed spectacularly. For a bunch of drunkards, Hondo and his crew were a sly and crafty bunch.

But he had to admit, the party had been pretty fun. And he'd been enjoying all the ones since. He still didn't trust the pirate, but he was a lot different when he was on your side. His favorite thing about hanging with them, was that it was easy to forget your troubles. When he was striking deals and sneaking around, he didn't have to feel the guilt of all that had happened. Sometimes it would creep in at night during quiet moments, but then he could just wash it down with some spice and forget it for awhile.

Hondo often credited him for helping rebuild his pirate empire. Anakin wasn't sure if he was really proud of that, but it was fun to stick it to the empire in new and different ways. More fun than being a serious rebel fighting for freedom. It was a strategy game like the ones he played back in the clone wars. Except it was psychological. He didn't really know if any of the imperials he faced knew that he had been Vader. And he didn't really care. He wasn't running around slashing his lightsaber, so for all they knew, he was just another annoying pirate. One they probably wouldn't survive meeting.

The crew would gather after every successful mission and tell stories and trade news. Then they'd have a couple drinks and party until early morning.

Anakin didn't really pay a whole lot of attention to what they considered news. It was usually just comparing their exploits to rival pirate gangs.

"Hey hey hey," Hondo's slurred voice broke into his thoughts. "I heard a story the other day that might interest you." Oh here we go, Anakin thought and took another sip of the rum in front of him. He tuned Hondo out and just listened to the music letting the alcohol fuzz his thoughts and feelings. At least until he heard "two white laser swords."

"What did you say?" Anakin snapped to attention.

"Mael, buddy, you need to go easy on those drinks. Your attention span has dropped even by pirate standards." The drunken captain chuckled. "I was saying that I've been hearing stories about this cloaked lady that appears out of nowhere. She swoops in, sets things right, and disappears. Nobody knows who she is or where she goes. But they say that she has two white laser swords like those things you Jedi used to carry around. Oh and get this! She's accompanied by an akul. That's unheard of. The reason those crazy beasts aren't found all over they galaxy is because no one is fool enough to try to tame one."

Anakin's mind was suddenly buzzing. He hadn't really allowed himself to think about Ahsoka since he'd been indoctrinated into Hondo's crew.

"Could you imagine what a powerful ally she'd make! With the two of you by my side, we'd be unstoppable..." Ohnaka's voice faded out and then there was a loud thump as he fell backwards off the stool because he'd passed out. But Anakin really didn't care. He usually found them draped over pretty much anything the mornings after their parties.

"Ahsoka..." he breathed.

–-

Luke sat in the cabin of the millennium falcon leaning over a broken holocommunicator. He had tools spread out in front of it as he fiddled with it trying to make it work again. It had been about five standard months since he'd joined Han and Chewbacca's crew so he could leave Tatooine behind him. He'd been wanting to send a message to Leia for awhile now, but they were never in a safe enough place to do that. His aunt and uncle were probably worried about him, but he didn't really care anymore.

Han Solo was an obnoxious braggart who thought he knew better than anyone. But he could be charming when he wanted to be. He was older than Luke had originally thought, but he didn't really act like it. He teased Luke mercilessly about his beliefs about the Jedi and the force; he claimed it was just a bunch of smoke and mirrors. Despite Luke getting him out of trouble time and time again with it, he remained a disbeliever.

"There! That ought to do it," he said to himself as he snapped the panel back in and tried turning it on. It worked. "Finally," he thought. He typed the numbers to call Leia, rubbing his fingers through his hair and brushing off his jacket.

"Luke!" She cried out. "Everyone's been worried sick! Where have you been?"

He stared at the image of her pretty face. It was nice to know someone cared.

"Oh here and there," he tried to reply casually, but she gave him the look and he spilled the beans immediately. "Dad dumped me back on Tatooine, but I couldn't stay there! I'm supposed to be training to be a Jedi, but my uncle just locked my lightsaber away and forbid me to even talk about it. So I ran away. No big deal. I joined a smugglers' crew. It's fun. We get to mess with the empire and I get to run in and save the day."

"Luke, you're not using the force all the time are you?" She asked nervously. What was she so upset about? He thought if anyone would understand it would be her.

"Of course I am. I'm getting better everyday! I can't wait to show you all I've learned."

"But people see you use it and the lightsaber?"

"All the time. People always ask me what am I? And I say 'I'm a Jedi!'"

"Oh Luke!" She shook her head, "don't you know how dangerous that is?"

"What's so dangerous about it? I can strike down a dozen people with blasters and no one lays a finger on me!" He was getting agitated. Why did everyone think being a Jedi was such a bad thing? He'd always heard good things about them; amazing things! As if sensing his frustration, even at such a distance, her voice softened.

"Do you know what happened at the end of the Clone Wars? Why you only hear stories about them but never meet any?"

"No," he said shaking his head.

"They were slaughtered." She said. "It became a death sentence to be one. Any survivors, anyone that showed signs of being one was hunted mercilessly. If people find out you are one... if they live to tell about it... you'll never be safe again!"

Luke gulped. He'd never thought about it. "But what about dad? And Ahsoka? And old Ben? And and..."

"Did dad tell you why the Jedi disappeared?" She interrupted him.

"He just said that the emperor was manipulating everything. That he turned bad to save mom. But he failed. Why? What really happened?" Luke was feeling disheartened. He thought talking to Leia would make him feel better, not worse.

His sister looked as though she was deciding exactly how to give some bad news. He wanted to stop her. He didn't want to hear it, but he knew he needed to. "Dad is the reason they were nearly wiped out." She said at last. But she didn't have a chance to say more. An explosion rocked the ship.

"We're under attack!" Han yelled at him. "Get in the nose gun!"

"Luke! What's going on?" Leia asked but the connection failed and she flickered away. He jumped up and ran down to the gunner seat. Dad was the reason there weren't many Jedi left... what did that mean?

"Boy! I don't know why I let you talk me into joining my crew! You've brought me nothing but trouble!" Han yelled from the bridge as he tried to outmaneuver the ships that were now chasing them.

"I seem to recall you finding plenty of trouble before I came along!" Luke yelled back. Not really in the mood to argue right now. He shot down two fighters, but they weren't ties. Pirates... he curled his lips in disgust.

"Raaaaaahhgh aaaaahnr huurh!" Chewbacca growled an agreement from the rear gunner's seat.

"Oh can it, Chewie!" Han replied as the ship shuddered from another explosion.

"Why aren't we jumping?" Luke called out as several more ships appeared in view.

"Hyperdrive is broken, we're dead in space. Chewie, get down here and fix it. Boy, prepare for boarding!" Han barked the orders. The falcon trembled as a ship docked with it. "Never mind! In with the goods!" They all scrambled into the secret hiding place of their contraband. Watching through the cracks as a group of pirates walked around the ship searching.

"The ship is empty captain." One of them said.

"It can't be empty, it was shooting back at us. Search again!" Drawled another voice.

Luke's hand tightened on his lightsaber, mentally preparing for battle. But the pirates wandered off.

"So was that your girlfriend?" Han whispered casually.

"What? Ew no!" Luke scowled at him.

"That bad huh? She looked pretty fine to me." Han grinned.

"Aarrragghuuhw?" Chewbacca asked.

"She is fine! She's a princess! And yes I love her," he responded punching the Wookiee on the arm only to get a return punch that knocked the wind out of him, he never learned. "She's my..." he stammered. "She's my sister."

"Now you're just pulling my leg!" Han said but then they all fell silent as some footsteps got closer. They shifted slightly to prepare to surprise the pirates. Luke was always the one that went first. His reflexes were faster and his weapon more destructive.

He counted to himself, wait for it, he thought. And then he pounced. Moving the grate above them with one fluid motion, he leapt up into the air, but before he could swing, he went flying back into the wall of the ship. He hadn't even seen what hit him. As he slumped to the ground, he heard Chewie cry out in pain.

"Take it easy..." Han started but was interrupted by the pirate they'd tried to attack.

"Luke! What the hell are you doing here?"

Luke looked up, his vision was red from the pain of being knocked back. Standing above him was his father.

–-

"Do you two know each other?" Hondo asked coming around the corner with several other pirates on his tail.

"Yes." Anakin said, but Luke had said no at the same time.

Hondo just looked between them. "Well Maelstrom, it's up to you what you want us to do with them." Anakin didn't respond. He was looking at Luke trying to read him. What had happened? Why was he hanging out with these lowlife smugglers? He'd taken his son back to Tatooine believing he'd be better off. Yet here he was in the middle of space glaring up at him.

"Take those two to the brig. I need to have a little chat with my son." Anakin said at last. To Ohnaka's credit, he didn't ask any questions, but he'll probably hear about it later. He loomed over Luke while he waited for everyone else to leave the area. Then he pulled him to his feet and dragged him down the passage to the bridge. "Why aren't you on Tatooine where I left you?" He demanded as soon as the door shut behind them.

"You mean where you abandoned me?" Luke replied venomously. Anakin was taken aback.

"I didn't abandon you!" He said, his voice rising. "I was protecting you! Keeping you safe!"

"Protecting me from who? You?" Luke hissed. Crossing his arms. "Good job!"

Anakin froze. What had Luke heard? What did he know?

"Luke," he said trying to steady himself. "I told you, I had some things I had to work out. I can't offer you a better life until I do."

"Is joining pirates one of them? I don't want to hear your lies. Why are all the Jedi dead? What did you do?"

Anakin felt anger burn in him again. He had kept wishing people would punish him for the mistakes he made, but he never expected it to be his son. There was no easy way to tell him the truth. No way to spin it so it didn't seem so bad. He wanted to just yell. To just rant. To let all of it out. But what was the point? No one could ever hear what he had to say and believe it was justified. He didn't even believe that.

He could feel the seething anger in Luke as well. He could see himself in him, and suddenly he felt lost and broken all over again. If Ahsoka were here, she'd respond to him with love. She'd be tender and sweet and tell him everything would be alright until even he believed it. But she wasn't here. And now he saw, for the first time since he'd come back to the light, that the true consequences of his actions would never be felt by him. Only those impacted by his choices.

He sat down hard in the other chair. He didn't have a clue where to start. How do you explain it? Maybe you didn't.

His comm beeped but he ignored it. Him and Luke sat in silence for a long while as Anakin just breathed in the waves of anger and hate that rippled off of Luke like they once had him. "I made mistakes." He said softly. "So many mistakes."

Luke didn't look up at him. He knew the moment the words came out they were weak. Nothing could ever be said about what he'd done that wouldn't be weak.

"I failed as a Jedi because I fell in love with your mother. Jedi aren't allowed to form attachments. They create emotions that can lead you to the dark side; jealousy, anger, hate, fear... I was afraid to lose her. I started having visions that I would. That she would die in childbirth. I couldn't let that happen. I knew the Jedi, who had forbidden attachments, would not help me..."

"So you slaughtered them?" Luke interrupted savagely.

Anakin was trying to resist the anger that was bubbling beneath the surface, but it was getting increasingly difficult. "No... well... I let a Sith Lord manipulate me into believing that if I joined him, I'd be able to save her. I was so desperate to at that point, I would do whatever it took. And that meant obeying my dark master's commands so that he would teach me the power."

Their lives for Padmé's... at the time, it had seemed like a perfectly reasonable trade. But now as he looked in the eyes of his son... he saw reflected back at him the monster he'd become. How had anybody been able to show him love? It couldn't be love. Nobody could love that.

----

He got up angrily. He just wanted to burn it all down. What right did Ahsoka have pulling him back to the light? Lying to him, pretending? Making him believe there was hope for him? She was wrong, there was no hope. There was nothing left for him. He pulled his red lightsaber out of the pocket of his shirt and ignited it. Luke had jumped out of his seat the moment Anakin had stood. He too had his lightsaber lit.

"How dare you?" His son screamed at him. "I've spent every day of my life wishing my mother was alive, but not at such a horrendous cost! You were one of them! You betrayed them! You're the one that should have died! Not her!"

The fury overtook Anakin before he could restrain himself. He swung wickedly at the boy in front of him. Luke fought back with such ferocity that it surprised him. They moved throughout the ship, lightsabers clashing, both fighting from a source of rage and hatred. Luke's skills had tripled since he'd last seen him. They fought as though to the death, but when the ship suddenly tilted, it threw them both off balance and Anakin cut right through his son's arm. Luke screamed in pain and fell to the floor.

Something inside him snapped back to reality at the sight of his son in so much pain. He dropped his lightsaber and knelt down. But Luke kicked up at him and then got up and ran away. Anakin went racing after him, but was thrown off balance again when the ship tilted again the other way.

"Maelstrom!" His comm buzzed with Hondo's frantic voice. "The empire is here and has us all caught in a tractor beam. They're pulling us in!" Anakin didn't answer, he just kept chasing after his son.

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