#i know absolutely nothing about this series but my friend was listening to the books when we were in london together

[justalittlebluetiefling]

You can't write all that and not tell us what book/series you're reading. I would also like to be obsessed with him, please and thank you!

Okay, listen, so I HATE recommending books because it's like, this super intimate thing imo and people are so judgy about books. Also I haven't read all of these books so I have no idea where they're going or if the ending is going to be satisfying. Plus, the first book did come out in 2012, so it's not NEW and it's possible you have already read them. Honestly, I've never missed working in a bookstore more than when I was reading the first book, because it's absolutely something I would have picked up off the shelf and I stopped working at a bookstore right before this came out.

All that hedging aside, it's the Throne of Glass series and I'm actually only 1/4 of the way through the second book. People on the internet have lots of opinions about the reading order and I picked the pettiest one because when someone tells me I have to do something, I will do something else.

[blurredcolour]

I. "Do You Trust Me?"

"Trust" Series Masterlist

John "Bucky" Egan x WAC!Female Reader

A slight against one of your dearest friends causes you to act wildly out of character, and Bucky finds himself stepping up to save you as he realizes just what you mean to him after months of seemingly innocuous encounters.

Warnings: Language, Period Typical Sexism, References to Cheating, Reader Knees a Man in the Groin, Perceived Threats of Violence, Plenty of Kissing, Inevitable Historical and Military Inaccuracies, Rating - T.

Author’s Note: Well here we are, watching me write for this show before it's fully aired. Blame/credit to @precious-little-scoundrel and her anon for infecting my brain. Reader has an unnamed brother for sake of plot, no descriptions or y/n used. Events of this fic take place a few days before the horrific Regensburg mission. Also I recognize that WACs did not arrive in the ETO until July of 1943, this fact does not seem to have influenced Hanks/Spielberg so I shan't let it influence me either. This is a work of fiction based off the portrayal by the actors in the Apple TV+ series. I hold nothing but respect for the real life individuals referenced within.

Word Count: 4217

-------------------------

The pub was crowded, as usual, and Bucky leaned back in his chair as Curt regaled their table with another one of his stories from Walla Walla. The press of uniform clad bodies, damp from the summer rain outside, created a humid atmosphere. But as he tipped the last few drops of Scotch whisky from his glass into his mouth, he was certain there was nowhere else he’d rather be.

Buck had decided to sit this one out, wanting to catch up on his latest letter to Marge. His mouth ticked up at the corners as he reflected once again on how different he and his friend were from one another. Glancing at the bar while he contemplated fetching the next round, Bucky’s eyes widened as they fell on the last person he would ever expect to see in a pub. It took him a moment to recognize you in such an unusual environment, hair perfectly styled. He noted that you were even wearing makeup as your teeth sank into your brightly painted lower lip, wending your way through the crowd, clearly on a mission.

“Bucky are you even listening?” Curt chided with a sharp jab of his elbow into his upper arm.

“Yeah absolutely,” He nodded firmly, unable to take his eyes off you, “every word.” He tacked on as his gaze followed you across the room on your approach to the notorious flirt from 349th squadron, Arthur “Red” Jameson.

He was vaguely aware of the doubtful scoff his reply had earned as his eyes narrowed. Wasn’t your friend Mary rather serious about Red? Not that Red bothered limiting himself to any one woman, local or American – there were few limits that smug redhead put on his relations with the fairer sex. Perhaps that was why Bucky was feeling particularly annoyed with how close you had come to stand next to him at the bar. With the way you were smiling at him. You hardly ever smiled, had to be one of the most serious, reserved women he had ever encountered here in England or back home.

It was when you ducked your head to peer up at Red through your lashes that the realization hit him – you were fucking flirting with him. His fingers clenched tightly on his empty glass, fingertips blanched white as the strength of his grip drove the blood from the flesh there. A slow, knowing smile unfurled across Red’s face as he leaned in, his hand landing on your shoulder making Bucky’s teeth grind together almost painfully as he was flooded with proprietary rage.

The intensity of it startled him, made him take a sharp breath and relax his grip on the glass. Where in the hell had that come from?! The pair of you had spoken no more than a handful of times, simple interactions in the Operations Room of the Control Tower back when he was Air Exec, around the base, or most recently, that afternoon when you had lent him a copy of one of his favorite books, but it wasn’t like you were close. You were quiet, overshadowed by your boisterous friends Mary, Ruth, and that brunette whose name escaped him just then. They were always outgoing at dances while you did an excellent job of decorating the wall. It certainly was not like you were anything more than colleagues. Objectively that was the truth, however, as Bucky sat there watching you grin at that man…

The final straw came as your lips nearly brushed against Red’s ear, making that bastard’s eyes shoot wide, sending Bucky surging to his feet. He narrowly missed one of the low beams overhead as he glared across the crowded room at the cozy pair you and Red presented at the bar.

“Jesus Christ Bucky, did something jump up and bite your ass?!” Curt barked in surprise, the rest of the table laughing loudly in response.

Bucky barely heard them as his new vantage point allowed him a clear view of your knee colliding painfully with the apex of Red’s thighs, causing him to crumple against the bar as you bolted out the back door. Bucky stared after you, just as bewildered as Red’s friends, before they charged out the door in your wake.

“God dammit.” He muttered under his breath before climbing over his friends to make a dash for the front entrance of the pub, his cap clutched in his hand.

------------

Your Women’s Auxiliary Army Corp unit had arrived at Thorpe Abbots in late May, part of the first battalion of WAACs sent overseas. Assigned to the Eight Air Force, you had spent roughly a week with your British counterparts of the Women’s Auxiliary Air Force observing missions on other bases before it had come time to establish the base for the 100th.

Fast, accurate typing skills and a calm, quiet temperament had seen you promptly assigned as a clerk in the Operations Room, one of the tensest and most chaotic places on the entire base. Upon your arrival at training camp in Fort Des Moines, you had been adopted by a trio of far more outgoing women – Mary from Miami, a sun-kissed blonde who managed to look that way no matter what the weather; Ruth from Pittsburgh, a black-haired beauty who was manufactured from the steel her hometown was known for; and Violet from Savannah, a brunette who elongated every vowel like the southern belle she was.

Why they chose to waste any of their precious time on you was as much as mystery to you in England as it had been in Iowa, and yet any time you tried to convince them you would be perfectly happy sitting out a dance in your barracks with a book instead, they were adamant you attend. Bodily removed you from your cot to join them – not that you were one for dancing, even with the most handsome of airmen. And that title would most certainly have to be bestowed upon Major John Egan. Perhaps a bit of a rogue and more-often-than-not a little too deep into his cups, there was something undeniably charming about him. A magnetism that drew every woman on the base, and from across all of East Anglia, to him. The handsome devil knew it, too. Of course he did, that was, alas, also part of his charm.

Your trio of outgoing friends had gravitated toward him immediately, traded their fair share of coy looks and dances with him while you looked on quietly from the sidelines. He never really seemed to form that deep a connection with any of them, with any woman for that matter, but that did not deter the female population from trying to be the one to catch his eye for a bit of fun. It was during the long hours of the 100th’s first mission, while he was still serving as Air Exec, that you’d had your first occasion to speak to the man directly.

In the middle of one of the tense periods of waiting for news, he had poked his head into the office to see if anything had come across the teletype or wireless and you had looked up, meeting his eye. He was wearing his sheepskin coat, a striking combination of ivory and cognac colored leather that would have honestly looked absurd on anyone else, yet on him just seemed to belong over his dress uniform.

“Can I help you, Major Egan?” You had asked, fingers poised above your typewriter as you paused your progress in typing up a report for Colonel Huglin.

He had looked at you, startled a moment. “I was convinced you might actually be unable to speak. Glad to know I was wrong. It’s Bucky by the way. Just checking if there were any updates?”

“We’ll be sure to get them to you as soon as we have them, sir.” You had replied professionally, trying to ignore the warmth unfurling beneath your breastbone at having his attention directly solely upon you.

“That’s all I can ask then, thank you.” He had winked before slipping out of the room and heading back towards the plotting map.

It had not taken long for a series of updates to arrive, both by radio and over the teletype and being the highest-ranking clerk in the office, third officer, it was your duty to run them out to him. Grabbing both sheets of paper, you had quickly made your way across the room, startled to find him striding towards you, meeting you halfway. “Here you are Major Egan.”

“Touchdown.” He had grinned and taken them over to review with the others as you had hurried back to your office, gnawing on the inside of your cheek to hide your smile.

You had been admittedly saddened when he had been demoted to squadron commander of the 418th after Colonel Harding assumed command of 100th. For selfish reasons, certainly – your interactions had become increasingly limited after this point – but also because it meant he was more frequently put into harm’s way. Every time he went up in a fort, you found focusing on the job at hand more and more difficult. Unlike the ground crews or the brass, it was not looked upon kindly for the WACs to go running outside to see which forts had come back. Which airmen were injured. Sometimes it would take hours for you to confirm that he was all right, and only then by way of hearsay.

You had still run into Major Egan from time to time, while walking with your group of friends to the WAC mess for dinner – by mid-July you were now serving in the Women’s Army Corp as a 2nd Lieutenant, or after meetings in the Operations Room when he was not flying missions. But the longest conversation you ever had was during one of your breaks earlier that very afternoon. It was an uncharacteristically sunny day, and with no mission in progress you had decided to take your coffee break outside, behind the control tower, sitting on one of the benches the ground crew had built out of scrap wood.

Before you had enlisted, your brother had bought you a copy of his favorite book, one he had never let you read before because you were ‘just a kid’ but now that you were old enough to sign up for the service yourself, he had decided you could have your own copy. With just two pages left, it seemed the perfect way to break up the morbid tallies you had been typing up in the grim office upstairs, and you had just finished the final sentence when a shadow fell over you.

“Now how did you get a copy of my favorite book?”

You had lifted your eyes quickly, squinting slightly into the bright sun that shone from behind him, to see Major Egan standing there.

“Major Egan. You like Guys and Dolls, sir?” You had asked, startled.

“How many times do I gotta tell you it’s Bucky.” He had stepped out of the sunlight to sit beside you carefully. “I love everything by Damon Runyon. Which story did you like the best?” He had leaned in curiously.

Pursing your lips to think over the collection of stories you had just finished, you smiled briefly as the answer came to you. “’Madame La Gimp.’ Where they pass off the bag lady –”

“As a society matron! Yes!” Major Egan chimed in, laughing as he nodded in agreement.

“What…about yours?” You had swallowed, unable to stop yourself.

“God, I haven’t read this book in forever…” he had reached out for it, and you had set it in his hands easily.

He had sucked his teeth in thought as he turned it over in his broad hands. “It’s gotta be a tie between ‘Blood Pressure’ and ‘Hold ‘Em Yale’…ah but ‘Lemon Drop Kid’ is excellent, too.” As he had spoken, he had begun to gesture with the book to emphasize his words, making you press your lips together fondly.

“You can borrow it if you’d like.” You had blurted out before you could stop yourself. “Give me a definitive answer once you’ve read it again.”

Major Egan had looked to you quickly. “Really? But what if…how will I know to get it back to you?” He had raised an eyebrow.

“My name’s on the front page.” You had nodded reassuringly but swallowed tightly as he opened the cover as if to confirm it for himself.

“‘Hey Sis,’” He had begun to read the inscription he found there, bringing your brother’s words to life, “‘lighten up, would you? You don’t have to be so damned serious all the time. See you on the other side.’” He had paused a moment before his eyes had met yours, caught you watching him, before you quickly looked down at the grass at your feet. “Where is he?” he had asked quietly.

“On a ship in the Pacific, somewhere.” You had replied softly, finding each blade of grass infinitely fascinating.

“Are you sure–” He had begun to ask before the sound of your name being called by your very impatient Captain, a woman even Major Egan knew not to waylay, interrupted the peaceful afternoon.

You had leapt to your feet. “You’ll get it back to me.” You had nodded and rushed back inside, believing every word of it.

You had seriously contemplated sharing your encounter with at least Ruth, the more level-headed of your friends, knowing she was the least likely to conflate the exchange with a marriage proposal. But as you returned to your barracks that night, you frowned deeply to find Mary in tears on her cot. After much soothing and rocking in your arms, she finally managed to open up, sharing what had gotten her so upset.

“It’s Red…I caught him out back necking with one of those doughnut truck girls…” She hiccupped and dabbed at her nose with her hanky.

“Oh Mary, I’m so sorry.” You frowned, smoothing her hair back from her forehead.

“Oh god, I can’t believe I let that creep talk me into sleeping with him!” She wailed, fresh tears boiling over onto her cheeks as she sagged onto your shoulder, sobbing anew.

Every muscle in your body tensed as her outburst sunk in, the depth of his betrayal fully registering as Vi and Ruth returned from the end of their shifts in the weather office and Mary launched herself into their arms to fill them in as well. The level of pure fury that seized your body was utterly foreign to you and, unlike the descriptions you had encountered in literature to date, felt utterly icy in your veins. As your friends gently coaxed Mary to the latrines to get herself cleaned up, you hung back, a plan formulating quickly in your mind. Your life without these women would have been lonely, all but intolerable, and this transgression against one of them could not go unanswered. You could not look at yourself in the mirror if you did nothing.

Digging quickly through Mary’s belongings, you found her most alluring shade of lipstick, carefully but efficiently applying it to your lips before unpinning and redoing your hair into a more fashionable shape rather than the more utilitarian style you normally wore. Lastly you added a flick of mascara to your eyelashes and rouge to your cheeks. All this was accomplished using the tiny mirror Vi had set up on the shelf beside her bed. Nodding once in satisfaction, for it was truly the best you could do in a solo effort, you darted out the door, lipstick tube in your pocket for reapplications, if necessary. The cad would never see it coming from you, you just needed to figure out a way to get close enough.

Fortunately, the years you had spent on the sidelines watching the three masters of feminine wiles at work had afforded you quite the education. It was only a matter of finding the perpetrator to enact your revenge. You located him in the second pub you visited, taking a slow breath as your eyes sought him out in the crowded, humid space. The rain had thankfully stopped before your foray out into the night, though the streets remained wet, and you had taken the time to refresh your lipstick and tidy your hair before stepping inside. Your heart began to race as your veins flooded with adrenaline.

‘Easy now. Slow and smooth like Mary, give him that flirty smile she’s famous for.’ You thought to yourself.

As his eyes met yours it was all you could do not to wince back in disgust – you were going to need to hide your dislike better.

‘Pretend he’s someone else. Who would you like him to be?’

You gulped shyly, teeth sinking into your lip at the thought of applying these skills to Major Egan, noting that Red seemed immediately more receptive as you slid up beside him where he stood at the bar.

“Evening, Red.” You smiled at him broadly, swallowing nervously as he echoed the expression warmly.

“Well good evening to you too. You escaped the base.” Red teased you.

You faked a giggle and tilted your head down before flicking your eyes to look up at him through your lashes, something Vi had weaponised to great effect on many an occasion. You tried not to shout in triumph as Red’s hand came to rest on your shoulder, leaning in closer.

“Can I buy you a drink, sugar?”

“Actually…” You smiled coyly before leaning in close to his ear, taking a slow breath before dropping all pretense from your tone. “Mess around with one of my friends again and I’ll cut it off.” You snarled into his ear before driving your knee into his groin as sharply as the straight lines of your uniform skirt would allow, slipping out of his grip as he slouched over the bar with a cry of pain.

You longed to bask in his suffering, in your triumph, but you also recognized you had to get out of there before the consequences of your actions found you. Spying a door propped open to a back alley over Red’s crumpled torso, you made a dash through the stunned corner of the pub and out into the night, pausing a moment before turning to the left, hoping it was the correct direction. You certainly wished you knew your way around town a little better.

Your heart was pounding so hard you were worried it might burst through the front of your WAC jacket as you neared the main street but there was an increasing ruckus behind you – surely Red’s friends in hot pursuit. Suddenly Major Egan appeared in front of you, seemingly out of nowhere, and grabbed your arm, pulling you around a corner and down a smaller alleyway.

“Do you trust me?” He asked quickly, glancing back towards the approaching sound of voices as he shuffled you backward, closer to the brick wall of the building behind you.

You nodded at him, speechless, breathing heavily from your flight. Your uniform cap felt precarious where it was perched on your rapidly falling hairstyle. Major Egan’s aftershave was flooding your senses due to his sheer proximity.

“I’m going to kiss you now.” He whispered as his eyes met yours, his own cap at a dangerous angle atop his dark curls, defying gravity.

He shifted forward to crowd your space, your eyes shooting wide as his forearms lifted to press against the wall on either side of your face, body shielding you from view. He bowed his head to press his lips against yours softly, making your eyelids flutter closed, doing nothing to slow the erratic beating of your heart. He tasted a little bit like whiskey, which had reminded you of gasoline the few times you’d had the misfortune of sipping it, but on his plush lips, it was not so bad.

Your hands balled into fists in the olive drab fabric of your skirt, heat painting its way across your cheeks and down your neck as the coarse hair that decorated his upper lip brushed against your skin. It was all too tempting to lose yourself in the feeling of him surrounding you, protecting you, kissing you. Reality reared its ugly head, making you inhale sharply through your nose as you heard the crowd of men stampede right past you muttering angrily.

“That damn cold fish from operations…”

“Who the fuck does she think she is?!”

“No wonder she ain’t got nobody.”

Pulling back from his lips, you frowned down at your brown uniform shoes, still hidden within the cage of his arms.

“Hey…” He murmured, bowing his head to nudge your nose with his, drawing your gaze back up as you swallowed shyly at the tender gesture. “Don’t listen to ‘em.” He urged you, his blue eyes so very dazzling and disarming at this range, even in the dim light of black-out conditions.

“I…It’s ok,” you breathed as you shook your head. “I know I’ll never be…” you furrowed your brow, not even sure what word you were searching for.

“Anything other than perfect, doll?” His lopsided grin was devastating, made it hard to breathe, though that may have also been his continued proximity. He leaned in for another kiss, but you lifted a shaky hand to press against his shoulder.

“Th…they’re gone you don’t have to pretend…” You murmured sadly, shifting to stand, but he did not move an inch, his breath brushing against your cheeks.

“I’m going to kiss you now because I want to, doll.” He murmured, eyes tracing over your face while giving you a moment to respond.

You were, however, frozen, staring at him again and so he pressed his lips firmly to yours, making your fingers curl slightly around the lapel of his uniform jacket. He hummed softly in response, pressing you back against the wall as he slanted his mouth tighter to yours, his hands moving to cup your cheeks. Shivering at the heat of his palms against your skin, you slowly lifted your other hand from your skirt, stretching it towards him, letting it hover between you tentatively.

He dropped his right hand from your cheek to guide your arm around his waist before sliding his own hand to splay against your lower back, drawing a whimper from your throat as you arched slightly.

He pulled back from your lips, chest heaving. “Christ, doll, you have no idea what you do to me.”

“Bucky?” You whispered, confused by his statement, finding it difficult to think clearly.

Bucky groaned and kissed you fiercely, licking at the seam of your lips, sliding his tongue to yours the instant you parted your lips for him. Toes curling in your shoes, you found yourself mewling into his mouth wantonly until he wrenched back suddenly, hand cupping the back of your head as he hugged you tightly into his chest. The sound of voices eventually registered in your addled brain – Red’s friends returning from their failed attempt to find you.

“If I had known all I had to do was kiss you senseless to get you to use my name…” Bucky teased once the coast was clear, panting into your hair.

You giggled against his throat, your own chest heaving as he loosened his hold on you. Your cap tumbled to the ground, fully dislodged by his attentions.

“It’s a burden I’m willing to bear.” He smirked, pressing his lips to your exposed forehead. “Let’s get you back to your barracks. What are you doing out here all dolled up kneeing idiots like Red in the goods anyway?” He asked as he bent to retrieve your cap, dusting it off and placing it in your outstretched hand before turning to slide his arm around your shoulders, leading you toward the main road.

You huffed with a frown as you walked with him, putting your cover back into place snuggly, crushing your once-stylish hair. “I didn’t appreciate the way he treated Mary.”

Bucky smirked at you “Your brother is right you know, you really do need to lighten up…you can just call him a good-for-nothing and be done with it. No need to write a formal treatise on his behavior.”

His lips stretched into a grin as that pulled another laugh from you. You turned to look at him properly and gasped.

“Bucky you have lipstick all over –”

“Perfect” He nodded proudly, cocky grin on his lips, and made no move to clean up his face, while you quickly wiped at yours, knowing you would have to face your barrack-mates. “Next time you go on an attack mission you let me know, alright, doll? I’ll fly on your wing anytime.” He winked at you, and you bit your lip shyly.

“Thank you, Bucky.” You swallowed and stopped walking, leaning in to press your lips to his cheek softly.

As you pulled back, Bucky flexed the arm he still had slung about your shoulders, hauling you in for another heart-stopping kiss, your hands coming to rest against his chest. You had a feeling that the rather lengthy walk back to base was only going to become exponentially longer and found you really did not mind at all.

-------------------------

Read Part Two - "Just Had To Trust You."

"Trust" Series Masterlist

[kpop---scenarios]

Dark Book Series (1) - Masked

Pairing: Lee Felix x Reader

Warning: A lot of mentions of murder, blood, and smut. [18+ ONLY. MINORS DO NOT INTERACT]

Word Count: 5.4k

Taglist: @velvetmoonlght @skittlez-area512 @skzdust @gnabnahcsworld @onlyhyunjin @stephanieeeyang @lostasoulinthedarkness @imperfectlyperfectprincess1 @iam-wh0

@ayyonoona

Felix | Hyunjin | Lee Know | Changbin | Jisung | Chan | Seungmin | Jeongin

“You're not still seeing Felix are you?” Your best friend, Yujin asks, switching her load of laundry from the washer and putting it into the dryer.

You turn your head to look at her and laugh. “Yeah.” You smile. “We've been seeing each other for a few months. Why?” You ask, also switching your load. She was only at the laundromat with you because the machines in your building broke and your landlord is too much of a cheap ass to get them fixed. Though Yunjin has her own home, the both of you prefer the bulky washer and dryer at the shop, so you can do a bigger load.

She bites her lip, glancing down at her phone, typing things in, holding it to her chest as she speaks. “Listen… I'm not saying it's him for sure. But you remember that coworker you were having issues with? June?” She mumbles.

**

“Oh my god! June!” You exclaim. “Look at this.” You say, waving her over. June rolls her eyes as she gets up from her desk, shuffling over to you.

“What?” She snaps.

“We overpaid to the LCC. Look. Like, 8 thousand dollars too much.” You say, pointing to the payment total. “I'll go tell Soobin.” You say, pushing away from your desk.

“No!” She yells. “I'm already up, I'll go tell him.” She finishes, walking away from your desk. You watch her walk over there, faintly hearing every few words she tells him.

“Overpaid…8 thousand… Y/N.” Oh good. She mentioned it was you who found it. You were worried for a second that she would try to take the credit. She had been absolutely fucking awful to you as a mentor the last few months. Nothing you did was ever good enough in her eyes, even the teeniest, tiniest mistake, she pointed out, rather loudly, calling you an idiot. This happened on multiple occasions.

“Y/N.” Soobin calls out. “My office, please.” He says, gesturing June into his office, just as you see your department head walking straight towards Soobin's office. This made your stomach turn. What was going on?

You got up from your chair, making your way down the little corridor hallway down to his office, behind the head of the department. You step inside, closing the door, taking the last seat available as everyone stares at you.

“What happened with the LCC?” Mr. Jung, the head of the department, asks you.

“I was just relooking at the invoice today and noticed that it was overpaid.”

“By 8 thousand dollars?” He asks. “Who paid them?”

“June did.” You say, gesturing to her. She scoffs at you.

“I'm not an idiot like you, Y/N. I would never overpay like that.” She says. “Y/N paid the invoice.” She says, smirking at you.

“W-what?” You gasp. “No I didn't. It has June's name on it.”

“Do you even know how to read?” June laughs. “Who hired this one?” She chuckles, looking between Soobin and Mr. Jung.

“You liar!” You snap. You can feel the tears brimming in your eyes.

“Y/N, enough.” Mr. Jung says. “We will conduct our own investigation. You both enjoy the rest of your day. It's 5 pm, so go home.” He finishes. You stand up first, walking out of the office, while June calls your name, but you ignore her. You didn't want to deal with her, only thinking about the fact that your new boyfriend was down on the sidewalk waiting for you.

As fast as you can, you gather your belongings, unfortunately still meeting June at the elevator. The ride down to the ground floor is quiet. You can feel your ears turning red as you fume. The bell dings, opening the door, and you walk out quickly, not bothering to hold the door for June. The second you see Felix, it's like a sense of relief washed over you. You walk straight to him, his arms wrapping around you, holding you closely.

“June's a bitch.” You mumble into him, just as the door opens, out walking the bitch herself.

“Can you take your PDA elsewhere?” She scoffs. “No one wants to see that.”

“I'm going to guess you're June.” Felix says, pulling away from you.

“I-I am.” She says.

“Nice to meet you. I'm Y/N’s boyfriend, Felix.” He says, extending his hand. She shakes it, but winces. You not noticing how hard Felix was squeezing it. “I hope you're treating my girl well.” He finishes, releasing her hand. She nods her head, wiggling her fingers as she walks away.

“I don't like her.” Felix laughs, opening the car door for you.

“Mhm, me either.” You mumble, getting into the passenger seat. Not noticing the smile that spread across Felix’s lips as he made his way to the driver's seat.

**

“Yeah? What about her?” You ask, feeling nervous. You glance around the laundry shop, it's quiet for a Saturday night.

Yujin turns her phone screen to face you, showing you the latest news article.

“Woman - 57, Found Dead In The Park.” You mutter, scrolling down slightly. “June Erikson, 57 who was an employee at JPH accounting, Found dead this morning from multiple stab wounds…” You trail off.

Yujin looks at you with wide eyes, placing her phone back in her lap. “That's so sad. Oh my god. I feel awful for her family.” You sigh.

“That's it?” Yujin exclaims. “That's how you react to that news?” She asks.

“I'm sorry?” You say. “How am I supposed to react?”

“You're supposed to be scared!” Yujin yells. “Felix did this!”

“What? Why?” You laugh. “Do you know something I don't?”

“I'm telling you, Y/N. It was Felix. You complained about her a lot. Think about it.”

**

“Oh my god. I can't deal with her anymore!” You exclaim to Felix. “Everyday it's something.”

“Baby, it's only Monday.” Felix laughs. “What happened?”

“She told everyone that I fucked up an account, and it wasnt me! I don't even have access to that account!” You whine.

“Just breathe, baby. Tomorrow will be better.” He says, placing a kiss on your lips.

~

“So how was it today?” Felix asks, as you slide into the car.

You sit there with your arms crossed, sniffling. You're trying not to cry but June was horrendous to you and you hated her so much.

“Maybe tomorrow.” Felix sighs, resting his hand on your thigh as he drives away from your work.

The next three days were all the same. June was relentless to you, she never let up, she was never nice and you so desperately wanted to quit even though you absolutely loved your job. She was just the worst part of it the entire thing.

“Oh babe.” He sighs, wrapping you in a hug. “You won't have to worry about her for much longer.” He smiles.

**

“Okay?” You laugh, rolling your eyes. “I complained about her to you as well. Are you sure you didn't kill her?” You ask.

“You know I'd never do that!” She scoffs.

“Just like I know he wouldn't do that either.” You sigh. “You really gotta stop this.”

“I'm sorry, I don't believe it wasn't him. Remember the night you met?” She asks.

It never fails, Anything Felix does or says has her bringing up that night.

*

“Fuck men!” You scream, your friends dragging you down the street, as you all drunkenly laugh, enjoying your night out. You had just broken up with your last boyfriend, a real piece of shit, and you were so happy to be free, and able to have fun and do what you want.

“Fuck you, bitch!” Some man yells, glaring towards you and your friends.

“Aww, did that upset you? Someone's got small dick syndrome.” You laugh, yelling back as they try to drag you away.

“The fuck did you say to me?” He screams, rushing towards you. He stomps towards you, screaming, spit flying from his mouth as he approaches you, waving his finger. You close your eyes, tensing up as you wait for some sort of impact, but it doesn't come. You open one eye, peaking out, seeing a man standing in front of you, the man who was previously screaming at you, stopped in his tracks.

“You better watch what the fuck is gonna come out of your mouth next.” he snaps, no hint of humor in his very deep voice.

“This doesn't involve you.” The man scoffs, trying to move past the man who was helping you. He doesn't get very far, the man helping you, grabs the other by the collar, pulling him in close.

“You take one more fucking step, and I'll kill you and your whole fucking family. Understood?” He asks.

The man looks at you, muttering something about you not being worth it, before pushing the man off of him, turning around to go back to his friends.

The man who helped you turned around, and you felt like you had died and gone to heaven. He was the most attractive man you had ever seen. Blonde hair slicked back, dark eyes and a sinister smile.

Just your type.

“Thank you…” You trail off, unable to take your eyes off him.

“Felix.” He laughs.

“Thank you, Felix.” You smile, slowly shaking his hand. You were so mesmerized by him, you couldn't look away.

“Y/N…” Your friend, Jennie, urges, grabbing your shoulders.

“Come on. Let's go.” Jisoo whispers, pulling on your other hand.

You smile at Felix, walking backwards with your friends, still staring at him as he smiles, watching you walk away. From that moment on, you knew he'd be yours.

“That was fucking weird.” Yujin says, laughing. You can tell it's her uncomfortable laugh, she didn't like him right off the bat.

“It was hot.” You say.

“You're a psychopath.” Yujin shivers.

*

“He was just trying to protect me. And you, Jennie and Jisoo. He's not a bad man. I don't know why you can't just look past that.” You huff, grabbing your clothes from the dryer. “Look, I gotta go. Felix is waiting for me. Just please try to give him a chance?” You half smile, leaning in for a quick side hug, hoping things between her and Felix would get better.

A few weeks later, Jennie, Yujin and Jisoo had finally agreed to go out with you and Felix. You were so excited that all your favorite people were going to be in the same room, getting to know each other and hopefully finally getting along.

“I don't know why she doesn't like me.” Felix sighs, the two of you sit in a quiet pub where the music isn't as loud, people are calmer and the atmosphere is a little more relaxed.

“She will babe, I promise.” You smile at him, grabbing his hand. “Tonight she'll see how great you are.” You finish, leaning in for a quick kiss.you hear the bells on the door ringing, along with loud chatter. You can already tell it was your friends coming in. You turn around smiling and waving them over to the table, you and Felix already were sat at.

“Hi guys.” You smile as they all sit across the table from you two. “What's going on?” You ask.

“Jennie was just telling us about Hyunjin, she thinks he's going to propose.” Jisoo giggles. Your mouth drips as you grab her hands.

“Oh my god! That's so exciting!” You shriek. “Aw, you'd make the most beautiful bride.” You gush. You glance over at Felix, who's smiling, watching you with your friends.

“Sorry babe.” You laugh. “I’d officially like you guys to meet Felix.” You say, pointing to him. “Felix, this is Yujin who you sort of know, Jisoo and Jennie.” You say, pointing out each one. Felix stands up, shaking each one of the other hands, Jennie and Jisoo giggling as they look at him, but Yujin is straight faced, giving him a little smile.

She was going to be tougher than you thought.

“What do you guys want to drink?” You ask. They all give you their drink orders, Felix slides you his card with a wink, as he begins to talk to your friends, Jennie and Jisoo already immersed in the conversation as Yujin sits back with her arms crossed, observing the interactions.

“Hi.” You smile at the bartender. “Can I get 3 vodka crans, one vodka and sprite, a rum and coke and then 5 shots of tequila please?” You ask, setting down Felix’s card.

“Need some help, darling?” You hear a deep voice from behind you. You smile, turning around, expecting to see Felix but instead you're met with the face of a man you don't know.

“No thank you.” You say politely, grabbing a few drinks, taking them to your table and heading back to the bar for the rest.

“You sure? A pretty girl like you can't do everything yourself.” He winks.

“I'm good. Thanks.” You say, grabbing the rest of the drinks. The man grabs your wrist, holding you in your spot. By the time you look up at him, Felix has already gotten up and made it to you, grabbing the man's arm and pulling it off of you.

“She said she was good, man. Take the hint.” Felix says, taking a few drinks from your hand, and moving out of the way for you to go first. You blush as you make your way back to your seat, Jisoo and Jennie giggling at the interaction that just happened.

You didn't notice Felix turning his head to glare at the man, but Yujin sure did. A few hours later, Felix gives you a long kiss, heading to the bathroom, while you girls drunkenly gush about anything and everything.

“Thoughts, feelings, concerns?” You ask, as soon as Felix is out of ear shot.

“I like him!” Jennie exclaims.

“Me too!” Jisoo smiles.

“I don't like him.” Yujin yawns. “He's fake. He's acting and I don't fucking like it.” She snaps.

“You're never going to be happy for me, are you?” you sigh, feeling slightly defeated.

A few minutes of silence later, Felix wanders back from the bathroom, rubbing his hand along your back. “You ready, baby?” He asks, letting out a yawn.

“Absolutely.” You smile. “Thank you girls for coming out tonight. Let's do it again soon!” You smile, but give Yujin a little glare before you slide your fingers in between Felix’s.

“It was really nice to meet you guys. Thanks for a great night.” Felix smiles towards all three of the women. Jisoo and Jennie wave to you both, while Yujin keeps her arms crossed, avoiding eye contact.

“I'd say that went well.” Felix smiles at you, as you both pass the alley on your way home. You don't have the heart to tell him what Yujin said.

“I think so too.”

**

The next morning you woke up to a few missed calls and texts from Yujin. You open one eye trying to focus without closing your eye, until the headline she texted you catches your eye.

“Man Found Dead Outside Local Pub.” You read.

You dial Yujin's number, rubbing the bridge of your nose as you wait for her to answer.

“Did you read the article?” She asks, answering the phone.

“Yeah?” You say. “Who is that?”

“The guy from the bar!” She yells. You crawl out of bed, careful not to wake Felix as you shuffle to the bathroom.

“What guy?” You ask, quietly closing the bathroom door.

“The one that came up to you when you were getting drinks.” She harshly whispers. “He was murdered. Just like June!”

“Okay? So there's a killer out there. Honestly Yujin. I appreciate you looking out for me, but this really is getting tiring. You don't spend time with him like I do. You don't know him.” You sigh.

This shit was giving you a headache.

“I'm just trying to protect you!” She yells.

“Seems like the only person I need protecting from is you. You're trying to ruin what is probably the best relationship that I've ever had. Enough.” You snap, ending the call.

After that day, Yujin had gotten to Jennie and Jisoo, and their once fondness for Felix, turned into hate awfully quickly, and you hated it. You truly did not understand where they were coming from. He didn't hit you, he didn't yell at you and call you names. He treated you like a princess, listened to you, cheered you up, he baked for you. He was everything you ever wanted and more, and there was absolutely no way you were going to let your friends ruin this relationship for you. So you stopped going out with them, you responded to calls and texts but not in the same way you did before. Your responses were dry, responding with the bare minimum answers and you knew they knew that you were disappointed but they were still your friends and you were still going to try to get them to see Felix the way you did.

“I just don't get it.” You whine to Jennie and Jisoo. “You guys loved him when you met him.”

“He was great…he might still be but like… Yujin had some really good points too. It's only been like, what, 5 months of the two of you dating and two people that have come into contact with you have died?” Jennie says.

“It's kinda crazy.” Jisoo adds.

“So is thinking that Felix is the kind of man who goes around murdering people.” You scoff. “That's kind of a stretch, don't you think?”

“Is it?” Jisoo asks.

You let out a long sigh. You were so frustrated with how they were acting but unfortunately you weren't able to control the way other people react.

“Come on.” Jennie smiles. “Yujin is waiting at the bar.” She finishes, pulling your hand. Felix had gone out with some of his friends, which had led you to deciding to go out with yours, but you had a feeling you were going to regret it.

And you did.

“Y/N!” Yujin smiles, standing up to hug you. She was surrounded by four men when the three of you walked into the bar. “I'm so glad you came. I've missed you.”

You smile back at her.

“I missed you too.” You say, wrapping your arms around her, hugging her back.

“Come, sit, meet some people.” She murmurs, pulling you down beside her.

“This is Yunho, San, Hongjoong, and Mingi.” She says, pointing to each handsome man sitting around the table. You give them each a small smile and a wave, feeling uncomfortable, almost like this was set up, for you specifically.

“So, Y/N.” Mingi smiles. “What do you do for work?” He asks.

“I uh, working at an accounting firm.” You respond, taking a sip of your drink. “What about you?”

“How's that? Fun? Boring?” He laughs. “The four of us are in a band.” He smiles, motioning between himself and the other three.

“That's cool.” You respond, trying to catch the attention of Yujin.

“Would you… Maybe wanna get out of here? Go somewhere more private to get to know each other?” Mingi asks. You raise your eyebrow as you stare at him.

“What did Yujin tell you this was?” You ask.

Mingi laughs. “To be honest, she thought we would mesh well. This is like a blind date… Isn't it?”

“I have a boyfriend.” You say, sliding your chair back, standing up and walking towards Yujin who had moved down towards Hongjoong. “Seriously?” You snap, grabbing her arm.

“What?” She asks, trying to play innocent.

“Don't. Don't do that innocent act shit. A blind date, Yujin? Really?” You respond.

She throws her hands up in frustration. “Would you have come if I told you?” She asks.

“Obviously not.” You spit.

“Exactly! There's better out there for you! You just needed to be shown.” She smiles.

“I'm not leaving Felix for Mingi.” You say. “He seems lovely, but I'm happy. Why can't you get that through your head?”

“Because!” She yells. “How can you be in love with a murderer!?”

“I can't. I can't do this with you anymore.” You scoff. “I'm just done.” You finish, walking back to your chair to grab your bag. “I'm sorry Mingi, it was nice to meet you but I have to go.” You smile, grabbing your bag and walking out the door.

Yujin called and texted apologies everyday. For months. And you didn't respond to any of them, you were too mad and frustrated at her to respond calmly.

**

“Another text.” You sigh, looking down at your phone.

“Babe.” Felix pipes up. It had now been 3 months since you had spoken to Yujin. “I think you need to forgive her.” He says.

You look up at him, shocked. “What?”

“It's been months. How many times does she need to apologize for what she's done? She's your best friend.” He says.

“Yeah… but she set me up on a blind date, Felix. How could she think that's okay?” You ask.

“Because she's being protective of you. Like I am. Was I happy about it? Absolutely not. Do I understand where she was coming from? You bet.” He says. “She'll come around.” He smiles.

“What if she doesn't?” You ask.

“Then we'll make her.” He winks.

**

A few days later, you're sitting in Yujins house with her. All the crying, hugging was finally finished.

“Okay.” Yujin, sighs. “I know what your answer is probably going to be. But I'm going to invite you anyway because I love you and I hope you'll come.”

“Okay?” You laugh, raising your eyebrow, curious about what's going to come out of her mouth next.

“I'm having a Halloween party next weekend. Costumes, drinks, games, the works. I really hope you'll think about coming.” She smiles.

“Oh!” You exclaim, laughing. “That sounds fun! Felix loves Halloween and dressing up.” You laugh, pulling out your phone to text him.

Yunjin sits there silently for a second, you can see her face sort of contorting as she thinks about how to put her next sentence as delicately as she can. You already knew what she was going to say. It had been 9 months now, and she still didn't like him or trust him.

“Actually, I just meant I'd like you to come. I'm sorry, but he's not invited.” Yujin whispers, twiddling her thumbs together.

“Yujin. Did we not just have a whole episode of working things out?” You snap.

“Yeah we did and I'm grateful for that because I've missed you. But he's still as fucking weird, intense and controlling as he was that day!” She snaps. “You deserve better! But you keep getting with these fucking losers.”

“Controlling? You've met him like twice, and put in no effort, except to judge him. He's not controlling.” You sigh.

“Then why don't you ever come out anymore? We used to do fun things all the time.” She pouts.

“Because of you! And your lack of consideration for my relationship.” You snap. “If you had a little more respect for me and Felix, then maybe I would.”

“Yeah, sure. It's not him at all.” She scoffs.

“Okay, I'm gonna go. Text me the details for the party. I'll think about it.” You sigh, getting up off the couch and heading for the front door.

You already knew you'd be going to the party. You knew Felix would be joining you, and you were all going to have a great fucking time.

**

The next weekend, you showed up to the Halloween party in a full Harley Quinn costume. You thought you did an amazing job on the costume, and by your friends' reactions, they thought so too.

“I'm so happy you decided to come.” Yujin smiles, pulling you in for a hug.

“Yeah.” You laugh. “Me too.”

“So what's the plan?” You ask, grabbing a drink from the fridge.

“It's just gonna be us four for a few hours. We're gonna pregame until the party starts around nine!” She grins.

“That sounds perfect.” You smile, taking a sip of your drink.

“Jisoo!” Yujin calls out, you, Jennie and her gathered around the island in the kitchen, waiting for Jisoo to come downstairs.

“Should I go look for her?” Jennie asks.

Yujin sighs. “Yeah, I guess. She was done like 30 minutes ago, I don't know why she isn't down here already.”

Jennie leaves the kitchen, heading towards the stairs. You and Yujin are chatting about nothing, when you hear the start of a scream before it's cut off. You both look at eachother, walking forward, very slowly, your arms linked together.

“Jennie?” You call out, in a semi whisper. “Are you okay?”

You hear footsteps making their way down the stairs. Jennie rounds the corner, but she's not alone. Someone in a mask stands behind her, a knife placed to her throat.

“Jisoo? Did you completely change your costume?” Yujin laughs. “Scared the shit out of her, I didn't you?” She says to Jennie, who has tears rolling down her cheeks. She's trying to hold in her sobs as the person behind her cocks their head to the side.

Yujin realizes quickly that it's not Jisoo under the mask. “Who are you?” Yujin asks. “What do you want?”

No answer.

You and Yujin stand there, breathing heavily as Jennie mouths pleas to the two of you, begging you to help her.

“Just step away from h…” You begin, stepping forward. The knife is pulled away from her throat, she breathes a sigh of relief, hunching over as she tries to catch her breath. The person grabs onto her hair, yanking her back up before plunging the knife through her back, the tip poking out of her stomach.

“No!” You and Yujin scream in unison, watching your friend have the life taken from her.

She gasps and gargles as the knife is ripped out of her body and shoved in again, and again, and again, until she can no longer stand. The masked person shoves her lifeless body to the floor, blood pouring from her mouth and each wound, the blood pooling around her body on the floor.

Screams erupt from you and Yujin, tears spilling from your eyes. The two of you go through the double doors to the living room, both of you frantically trying to find your cell phones. Jennie's body is dragged into the living room, streaks of blood left on the floor as she's dropped near the two of you.

“Why are you doing this!?” Yujin screams. “Where's Jisoo!?”

The masked person walks towards you two, turning towards the closet in the hall, pointing there.

“No, No…She's dead.” You gasp, crying a little harder.

“What the fuck did we ever do to you!?” Yujin screams. You let go of her hand, walking towards the faceless person. “Y/N!” Yujin screams. “What are you doing!?” She panics.

As you get closer, the person begins to lift the mask, and you're met with the handsome face of your boyfriend.

“Felix?” She gasps. You turn around, looking horrified that it's your boyfriend. She was right.

Of course she was. He walks up behind you, placing the knife against your neck as he places a small kiss on the side of your neck.

“Please don't kill her.” Yujin cries.

“Oh.” You laugh, wiping away your tears. “He's not going to kill me.” You giggle, taking the drenched knife from his hands.

“Hi baby.” Felix whispers in your ear.

“W-what is happening?” Yujin gasps.

“You know, Yujin. I got really tired of you accusing Felix of being a murderer.” You laugh. “Even though you were spot on.”

“She was.” Felix laughs. “You should have been an investigative journalist or a police officer.”

“So he did kill those people! And you knew?” She asks, her face contorted into a disgusted look.

“Yes, and yes.” You laugh. “Your constant nagging was getting really annoying. So when I approached Felix about an idea I had, I knew he would be totally in.”

“You planned this?” She asks. “We're supposed to be best friends!”

“Yeah, supposed to be. But you just couldn't let me be happy! You really have no one else to blame but yourself.” You sigh. “But I also had a condition. Felix had to leave you…” You pause.

“Thank you… thank you… I'm not ready to die.” She sobs.

“Oh, honey, no.” You laugh. “He had to leave you for me.”

“What?” She whispers. You grip the knife in your hand, walking towards hers.

“If you had just left me alone this whole thing could have been avoided.” You sigh, grabbing her shoulder with one hand, forcing the knife into her stomach. She stares at you with wide eyes as you push the knife in a little harder.

“Oh baby.” You laugh. “You were right, this is fucking exhilarating.” You groan. You pull the knife from her stomach, ramming it in again in a new spot as her body begins to collapse.

You pull the knife out, your hand covered in blood as you drop the knife, watching Yujin slowly dying on the floor. She tries to speak but blood pours from her mouth.

“That was so fucking hot.” Felix groans, pulling you towards him. He plants his lips onto yours, thrusting his tongue into your mouth. Your bloody hand moves down to his crotch, feeling his already hard cock, growing even more.

“Fuck me.” You murmur.

Felix guides you to the couch, pushing you down onto the floor, your stomach laying on the couch. He flips up your skirt before quickly unbuttoning his pants, pulling out his cock. Felix rips your tights open in the back, kicking your knees apart to spread yourself more. He spits into his hand, gliding it up your cunt, shoving two fingers inside of you, making you cry out. Felix pumps his fingers a few times before he pulls them out, lubing up his cock with your juices. He quickly and harshly thrusts himself inside of you, grabbing your neck and squeezing. He pulls you up against him, his hot breath hitting your ear as he rams his cock inside of you.

“Did it feel good?” He groans. “Shoving that knife into her?” He gasps as you clench your cunt around him.

“So fucking good.” You cry out, reaching down between your lips to rub your clit.

“You looked so fucking sexy doing it.” Felix grunts, ramming his cock into you.

His hand tightens around your neck, squeezing harder, making you gasp for breath.

“I fucking love you so much.” He groans, fucking you harder. “Cum, baby. Cum.” He grunts. You move your fingers faster on your clit, your orgasm coming quickly.

He releases your throat, making you cough. “Fuck. I… love… you.” You scream, cumming hard onto his cock.

Felix grips your hips, thrusting into you harder and faster, cumming right after you, filling you all the way up.

He pulls out of you, tucking himself away before he helps you up, grabbing the knife from on the floor and bringing it to the kitchen. He slips it inside the backpack he stored in the closet, setting it by the door.

“Get ready to cry, baby.” Felix grins, grabbing his phone. You make your way to Yujin's body, sprawled out on the floor, forcing your tears to come.

“Help! Please help! Our friends were murdered!” Felix cries into the phone. “We're at 44776 Roadway Lane. Hurry!” He cries, hanging up the phone.

“Ready to put on the performance of a lifetime, baby?” He grins.

“With you, I'm ready for anything.” You smile, leaning over Yujin's body, forcing the tears from your eyes to fall as the sirens get louder and closer.

“Police!” They yell from outside the door.

“In here! Please.” You scream. The police rush in, seeing your distraught face hovering over your friend as Felix cries in the corner of the room.

“What happened?” One of the officers asks, pulling you away from the body.

“W-we… were having a Halloween party.” You sob. “The five of us… we were going to drink a little before it started later. Someone broke in… started stabbing them… we hid in the closet until we heard the person leave.” You cry.

“Do you have a description of the person?” The officer asks.

“No. We didn't see the person. The person was wearing a mask. And then we hid.” Felix cries.

“I'm so sorry.” The officer sighs. “Let's get you two checked out.”

Felix stands up, holding his hand out for you. You grab his hand, whimpering into his arm as the officer guides you out of the house. Felix grabs his backpack, and you both walk down the walk away, hand in hand, leaving the crime you committed behind you.

[archangeldyke-all]

Something with like cellmate prisoner!sevika?! 😭😭😭 idk I just think like her being all dangerous and powerful, having a shit ton of friends but like selectively, no one messing with her maybe even hating how just mean she is. And then comes in reader and yk. I’d love if the story was smutty but u can chose ofc 🫦

i love this so much

men and minors dni

living in zaun is shit. but the one thing that's always kept you and a majority of your fellow citizens in line, was the ever-looming presence of stillwater prison just a few miles away. you've watched countless people enter those prison walls. you know very few who ever came back out.

and now, through a series of unfortunate events that lead to you assaulting an undercover enforcer, you're going to find out first hand just how horrible stillwater really is.

you don't think you've ever been so nervous in your life as the enforcer guides you-- restrained and already hating the itchy fabric of your new life-long uniform--down a long, long hall of cells.

he's chewing a wad of bubblegum, casually, like you aren't about to piss yourself with nerves. "listen kid." he says, looking you up and down. "i read your file. seems like you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time." he says, shrugging. "no prior arrests, clean record-- honestly i'm surprised they sent you here, but i guess you did break marcus' nose." the enforcer chuckles here.

"you know that asshole?" you ask. the man guiding you snorts.

"'s my boss." he mumbles. beside you, a prisoner lunges at the bars of their cell, screaming at you. you jump, and the guard laughs. "as i was sayin'-- you seem like a real peach. like you'd be a good influence on some of our... rougher prisoners." he mumbles.

dread starts to curl in your stomach. you have a pretty good idea of where this conversation is headed, and you don't like the outcome. you just hope you aren't cellmates with someone real bad: like genie the counter-fitter who got caught two years ago; esmee the weapons expert who successfully set an entire square block of piltover's wealthiest neighborhood ablaze; or, god forbid, sevika.

she'd been caught just weeks ago, smuggling an entire airship's worth of shimmer into piltover's loading docks. it was big fucking news.

sevika's a big fucking deal.

and you want absolutely nothing to do with her.

which is why, of course, the guard pulls you to a stop right outside of the only cell with a light on, the low, dim glow of a reading lamp and the quick flickering light of a lighter. you feel like you're gonna barf.

sitting in the shadows of the cell, puffing on a hand-rolled cigarette, sits sevika, silco's second in command.

if he's the eye of zaun, she's the arm. he might be watching-- but she's doing. she's nothing but bad news; everything you've tried your best to avoid while living in the undercity.

well, look how well that turned out for you.

"sevika, meet your new cellmate." the enforcer calls out. a pair of silver eyes snap up from her book and lock on yours. you shiver.

"fucks' wrong with her?" she mumbles. you gulp.

"nervous, i'd assume. 's her first-offense." the guard says. he shoves you into the cell and you jump as the bars slam shut behind you. "you ladies have fun." he says, before turning and walking away, the smacks of his gum echoing behind him.

sevika inspects you from her chair.

"how'd you fuck up so bad you ended up in a cell with me from your first offense?" she asks, seemingly intrigued.

"punched an undercover enforcer." you whisper. sevika's eyebrow hitches up, a little amused.

"yeah?"

"think his name was marcus, or something." you mumble. she sputters.

"ha! really!?" she asks, a little smile growing on her face. you nod. she takes a drag off her cigarette, then points at the bunk beds. "i get bottom. don't go thinkin' 'cause we're cellmates it means you get to touch my shit. i got people outside pullin' big favors for met to get shit like this." she gestures to her cigarettes and lamp. you nod. "don't look so nervous. i won't bite unless you piss me off."

you try to stop shivering. you don't succeed. "s-sorry."

she studies you for a moment, her smile growing as she does. though she's no longer armed with shimmer, her arm's still in perfect working condition, five little daggers gently tapping on the table top as her eyes dart across you. "you from the lanes?" she asks. you nod. she snorts. "you know who i am?" she asks. you nod again. she chuckles, then stands. she approaches you, circling around you like you're prey, then chuckling and leaning back against the table, crossing her arms over her chest. "you scared'a me?" she asks.

"shouldn't i be?" you choke out.

it seems to be the right answer. sevika laughs, then sits back down at her table, picking her book back up, chuckling intermittently for minutes after.

she's not a bad roommate. she's surprisingly tidy, always quiet, her nose usually buried in a book. she smokes like a fucking chimney, and you've come to find she gets her tobacco-- and sometimes a bit of weed-- from one of the guards every tuesday night.

she's got special privileges among most of the guards. they're always sneaking her books and flasks, letting her get away without cell-searches, letting her read past lights out and have lighters and screwdrivers and other dangerous, weapon-like tools.

you, on the other hand, do not have these privileges. and, keeping in line with sevika's one and only rule, you don't touch her shit. all of this means that while sevika smokes and works on her arm and reads and works out, you spend your time just... sitting on the top bunk. watching her.

sometimes, during open cell time, she gets visitors. you're surprised that none of these visits end in shady dealings-- sevika doesn't seem to need to trade her stash of goods for anything. most of her visits are quick, and most end the same way: a small scrap of paper being shoved in sevika's hand.

she burns the scraps after she reads whatever's on them.

she's... pleasant, sometimes. it's rare, but it happens. one day, you'd forgotten to make your bed before you went to breakfast. you returned to find it neatly made, and when you thanked her for helping you avoid trouble with the guards, she had just waved it off. "don' get used to it. i won't always be here to fix your mistakes."

once, a fight broke out while you were in the showers. you were sent back to your cell soaking wet-- your hair still lathered in shampoo. she had chuckled, called you a "wet rat", and helped you rinse your hair out in the tiny sink in your cell.

and... she's kinda pretty. it occurred to you one evening while the two of you were partaking in your nightly routine: sevika reading in her chair while you study her, pretending to sleep. she'd glanced up at you and whispered. "why're you always lookin' at me?"

you shrugged, then nearly choked on your tongue when 'you're pretty' almost slipped out of your mouth. "uh... i got nothing else to look at." you'd ended up saying. she seemed to accept this.

"you don't have any prison girlfriends?" you ask. sevika's in a particularly jovial mood today: the note she'd been delivered earlier in the afternoon must've had great news. she's decided to share her joint with you. the question slipped out the second you took your first puff-- your tolerance astronomically low from being without for so long.

sevika laughs. "nah."

"but..." you cut yourself off before you get yourself in trouble, biting your lip. sevika chuckles, then nudges your leg.

"y' can say it." she says. you smile at her, then speak.

"it's just... i had a few friends who work at babette's." you say. "i figured you'd have as much of a reputation here as you do there."

she takes a second, tilting her neck side to side as it cracks, then sighing. "i got shit to do in here." she says simply. you raise an eyebrow at her, biting your lip again, and she chuckles. "say it." she demands again.

"you just read all day." you laugh. sevika nods.

"i'm... working." she says. you just nod along, pretending you understand what she's alluding to.

it happens in the strangest way but you and sevika start to become... friends.

she sits alone at lunch, and you sit alone too, on the oppisite side of the cafeteria. but you're so used to looking at sevika, that you find yourself watching her even when there are much more entertaining things to look at, like the handful of fights that break out every meal.

you notice she loves the jello cups you guys get once a week. so you pocket yours and toss it at her later that night. the way she smiles lights up the room even brighter than her tiny lamp. you make it a habit.

she starts loaning you her books, finds you a crate to sit on by her table while you guys read together at night.

and when sevika gets jumped in the middle of the night-- you don't even question it before you jump out of your bunk, grab sevika's screwdriver where she left it on the table, and start swinging in the dark, blindly.

"what the fuck?" someone squawks when you manage to stab something in the dark.

"what?" sevika whispers in the dark.

"sevika, your bunkmate fucking stabbed me!" her attacker's voice rings out.

a light flicks on. you cringe at the sudden brightness, then blink in confusion as sevika and a guard with a screwdriver sticking out of their shoulder stare at you.

sevika's grinning. the guard is scowling. you hold your hands up in shaky fists, preparing for a fight. sevika chuckles.

"relax, sweetheart." she says, swinging her arm around you and tugging you into her side. "ran's a friend." she whispers into your ear. you blink at the bleeding guard, then back at sevika.

"so, what, we're taking your girlfriend with us now?" the guard-- ran-- asks. sevika looks at her friend, then looks at you, a calculating look in her eye. she smirks, shrugs, then looks back at the guard.

"she threw herself between me and a uniform-- can't just throw that kinda loyalty out, now can i?" she asks, smiling.

you don't know what's happening. you're about to ask-- when suddenly you black out.

the first thing that comes back to you is your sense of hearing.

voices.

"sevika, fuck, you can't just throw a wrench in the plan like this--"

"i can do whatever the fuck i want--"

"on the night of the breakout?! no heads up!?"

"do i need to remind you which one of us is second in command, here?!"

"...fuck. c'mon, help me load her in the van."

the next thing is your sense of touch. you're laying on the rumbling cold steel of a van floor-- currently in motion.

you're shivering, but then something warm and wool and smelling like cigars is draped over you.

you're head keeps bumping uncomfortably with every crack in the road. someone gently picks your head up and puts it in their warm nap, a hand coming down to scratch your scalp.

your voice comes next. "mmmh?"

"it's okay." sevika's voice comes. you groan, cracking your eyes open, only for her face to be grinning down at you. "fuckin' maniac." she giggles.

"wha?" you groan. you're seeing double, your head is pounding.

"ran knocked you out. 's what you get for stabbin' 'em." sevika chuckles. "but, you're lucky, 'cause they don't hold a grudge. they helped me lug your ass outta stillwater."

"wha?!" you ask again, snapping up. sevika laughs as you look out the front window of the van-- the depths of piltover surrounding you as you head, presumebly, to the last drop.

you recognize the man driving-- a tall, muscular, tattooed man who'd recently been added to your cell block's guard rotation. in the passengers' seat sits the guard you'd stabbed-- bandaged and watching you with amusement.

"wha's happenin'?" you mumble, looking back at your cellmate as you clutch a hand to your throbbing head. you've been shrouded in a red cloak-- sevika's already out of her prison uniform and back in her 'second in command' look. she smirks at you.

"y' really think i was jus' sittin' around, servin' my time?" she asks. you shrug.

"figured somethin' was goin' on. y' kept gettin' those notes. didn't wanna ask." you groan. sevika chuckles.

"well, you shoulda. or i shoulda warned you, so you didn't try killing my crew." she chuckles. you blink over to the person in the passengers' seat, cringing.

"s-sorry." you mumble. they wave it off.

"'s cool. knocked you right the fuck out, didn't i?" they chuckle. "we're even."

you turn back to sevika. "you broke me out of prison?" you ask. she shrugs.

"'re you mad about it?" she asks. you gawk at her.

"uh... just... a little surprised?"

sevika cackles. you smile at the sound, despite your headache. "i wasn't plannin' on it! then you started givin' me your jello, 'n readin' all my books, 'n..."

"she's got a crush on you." ran fills in from the front.

"i didn't say that!" she shouts.

"she's not denying it though--" the man driving teases.

you choke on your spit. sevika huffs, rolls her eyes, and speaks. "i... i kinda got a crush on you, yeah." she mumbles. "and i swear i'm not sayin' this jus' 'cause i think you're cute but: you should really stay with us at the last drop until things calm back down, since, y'know... you're kinda wanted now..." she says, rubbing the back of her neck.

you blink... shocked.

you don't really know what to think. you tried your whole life to stay out of trouble, and it managed to find you anyways in the form of a drunken under-cover enforcer deciding to smack your ass when you'd had too many drinks to hold your punches. you tried to stay out of trouble in stillwater until you were saddled with sevika. you tried to stay out of trouble with her until she dragged you-- literally, you were unconscious!-- out of prison along with her. it seems like trouble's meant for you.

but if there's one thing you're certain of, it's sevika.

you smile at her, then reach up to cup her cheek. she looks more nervous than you've seen her in all your months in stillwater together.

"you gotta crush on me?" you ask. she gulps.

"i'd say it's a little more than a crush seeing she broke you outta stillwater as your first date--"

"ran!" sevika hollers. you chuckle.

"is this our first date?" you ask, raising your eyebrow at her. she shrugs.

"it's... jus' don't expect the next dates to be this exciting." she chuckles, rolling her eyes. you grin, then dart forward and press a kiss to her lips. when you pull away, she's wearing that same nervous look again.

"you okay?" you whisper. she licks her lips, nuzzles a bit against your hand on her face, and nods.

"'m just kickin' myself for not puttin' the moves on you sooner. coulda been fuckin' you to pass the time in prison instead of readin' all those boring books." she mumbles. you burst into laughter, and she grins.

taglist!

@fyeahnix @sapphicsgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner @shimtarofstupidity @love-sugarr @chuucanchuucan @222danielaa @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther @gr0ssz0mbi3 @ellsss @sevikaspillowprincess @leomatsuzaki @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai @vikasub

[thisismeracing]

MICK SCHUMACHER MASTERLIST

✦ MICK SCHUMACHER ▶ MS47

All my Mick posts here

▸ main masterlist | patreon guide ▸ taglist ▸ who I write for & guidelines ▸ subscribe to Patreon for exclusive content ▸ tip me on ko-fi

KEYS: s: smut f: fluff a: angst ✷: Patreon exclusive

― ✦ SERIES

king of my heart: Mick Schumacher rode a lousy wave for quite some time, so when the sky gets cleaner and the sun brighter he just knows something terrible may be in store for him. Whereas y/n was just so magnetic, and the possibilities of life with her seemed better than anything his mind could ever create, that’s why, for the first time in forever, he threw caution carelessly through the window, hoping to get to the finish line before it catches up on him.

― ✦ SOCIAL MEDIA AU

I don't wanna be your ex (f): Y/n and Mick used to be the golden couple in the paddock, that’s why the internet went wild when they announced their breakup. Imagine how they reacted when Y/n dropped a song about not wanting to be his ex. Would the couple have any hope of getting back together?

sunshine (f): In which Mick starts dating an earthy/spiritual girl who just loves nature and good energy.

it was always you (f): Mick and Yn decided to stay friends after breaking off their two years relationship, but it seems like things weren’t that broken. Maybe having the same friend circle and seeing each other all the time meant that things were never really over.

angels like you (a): They say misery loves company, maybe that’s why Yn accidentally made Mick miserable too.

super shy (f): The one where your boyfriend is your biggest fan to the point of turning his account into a fan account or something of the sort. Or, Mick and Yn’s relationship through the years

go shawty (f): Every year Yn gets Mick a unique birthday cake. This year she’s ready to surprise the internet and her boyfriend again.

― ✦ BLURBS

I regret meeting you (a)

Say it again (f)

Friends don't (f)

I think I'm in love (f)

Speak now (a)

Light's on (f)

Suck it (s)

All mine (s)

Morning light (f)

Schatzi (f)

Beautiful things (f)

― ✦ REGULAR IMAGINES

our baby Angie (f): What happens when Mick refers to you as Angie's mom?

rosy cheeks, salty hair, warm bodies (s): After finally matching their schedules and booking a trip together, Yn and Mick decide to go to Mallorca for a well-deserved break. The fact that they went weeks without seeing one another and the tension around the hot weather and beach garments only helped build the momentum in which her boyfriend would absolutely ruin her in bed.

cherry (s): Mick has an idea while lying in bed during a lazy weekend, and Yn is more than ready to oblige.

suit testing (s): Yn decides to tease Mick until he gives up and takes her against the bathroom door while still wearing his racing suit.

an avid learner (s): Mick has been nothing but an attentive lover since they started dating, what Yn didn’t know was that he would be even more attentive in bed. It’s their first time having sex, and Mick is an eager learner, he’s set to make sure Yn forgets she ever dated someone before him.

banana pancakes (f): Mick is used to racing cars and living at high speed, but lazy rainy mornings with you are his favorite. Cuddling in bed, making banana pancakes, and listening to the rain fall down while swinging together on the front porch, no travel or circuit beats these moments.

love sips (s): Some bad moments leave the feeling that your whole day was destroyed. Sometimes, all you need to navigate life’s ups and downs is someone to remember you that bad events don’t equal a bad day, Yn decides on a very peculiar approach to remind herself that, and Mick, her boyfriend, is happy to help. 

god is a woman (s): Making out in bed never felt this deep and heart-stopping, but dating Mick and having him love you is a full experience of being a goddess. Your hips were his altar, and he would swear to everyone that God is a woman because you’re it to him.

call me obsessed (s): Everyone talks about how good it is to date someone who’s exactly like you, but Mick has been finding it hard to believe, especially when his girlfriend has the same sunshine energy as him. The problem? Too many friendly flirts around her. And though he’s not a jealous guy, he finds himself ready to praise her and prove to her that he’s the only one. You can say he’s obsessed.

twisted love (a): The rule is clear for all celestial beings: to love the Almighty beyond everything. They can’t share the feeling. It is perpetually prohibited for angels to get fond of humans, especially the protector angels. They are the ones who will follow their human on earth and protect each one. Those Angels and the humans are the same pairing throughout time. Mick watched Yn die and come to life in different forms each period, and he fell - in love, and from Heaven. Years after searching for Yn, he found her again and he’s ready to get what’s his.

I'll always take care of you (f): The flu caught you out of the blue and completely unprepared, good thing you have your boyfriend around to take care of you.

to build a home (f)✷: Mick and Yn are used to sharing everything, and always spending time with each other. However, they didn’t notice that things got easier because they ended up pilling some things in one house. His place is theirs now, but the same happened with her place. It only takes their respective siblings one look to figure out the whole situation. Will it scare them, or will they finally move in together?

die from a broken heart (a/f): After a fight with Mick, your secret boyfriend, you find yourself crying in your father’s arms, and it won’t take much for Toto to connect the dots. The thing is: what is going to happen when he finally does?

screw him (s)✷: When you move to a different neighborhood and discover your hot neighbor is a mechanic, half of your problems evolving your old car are solved. Your issues with your current boyfriend aren’t though. You too need a fix, and Mick may be the perfect guy for it.

― ✦ CONCEPTS

college!mick (masterlist)

― ✦ HEADCANONS

♡ how mick is as a boyfriend ● part 02 ♡ aftercare with mick ♡ how mick is as a husband ♡ mick as a dad ♡ baby making season ♡ size kink ♡ breeding kink ♡ mick dating a black girl ♡ fighting with mick ♡ choking kink ♡ NSFW alphabet ♡ mick dating a girl with anxiety ♡ mick dating a K-pop idol ♡ mick dating raikkönen!reader 𓂃☁︎ ✈︎𓂃 Around the world

♡ mick dating a desi girl ♡ mick dating a korean girl ♡ mick dating a latina ♡ mick dating a greek girl ♡ mick dating a lao girl

©thisismeracing do not copy, steal, or translate my work. do not repost on a different media platform.

[angelsanarchy]

Glass Houses: Jack Thurlow x Y/N Series CH 05 -> CH 06

"Didn't you say you had already befriended your neighbors daughter?" "I'd hardly call us friends. She doesn't know I'm crazy yet."

Tagging: @roryculkinluvr @thatsthewrongwallcraig @icarus-star @cc-luvr @madamemaximoff06 @shady-the-simp @quicksilversg1rl

"How is your sleep? Is it leveling out or are you still experiencing fatigue?" Jack stretched out in front of the computer screen and yawned.

"It's still weird. Some days I'm too exhausted to function. Other days I work my ass off to clear out the house but when I finally lay down, I just can't shut my mind off." Jack explained.

"What goes through your mind when you find yourself unable to sleep?" Jack rolled his eyes.

"Everything...nothing at all...I think about what I might do the next day or working on the book but then I'm too exhausted to even sit in the chair." Jack was growing annoyed with how his meds made him like a zombie. His brain was far too developed to not be able to use it during the day time.

"How about your appetite? Are you eating regularly?" Jack hated having to explain that he was miserable because his body required these meds to stay sane.

"Not as often as I should. Most of that is because I haven't done the grocery shopping yet. I have to put in an order." Jack listened to the hum come from the doctor.

"Have you thought about maybe going to the grocery store? Getting out among the people just to explore." Jack laughed.

"Yeah I'm not sure I have the energy for that. Maybe if I go late at night but I don't want to mingle just yet." Jack couldn't imagine having to walk through the grocery store having people stare at him or offer condolences that are empty and way too late. He wouldn't mind running into Y/n but that's a different story.

"Didn't you say you had already befriended your neighbors daughter?" Dr. Carty questioned making notes.

"I'd hardly call us friends. She doesn't know I'm crazy yet." Jack explained with a self deprecating laugh.

"You aren't crazy Jack. People live completely normal lives with mental illness. It's like any other illness and you are taking the steps towards a bit more normalcy." Dr. Carty had been with Jack since he checked into the facility. He felt like Jack absolutely needed to be hospitalized for the time he was in order to not only get to the root of his trauma but to allow his brain time to come to terms with it. He recognized all the progress he's made and wanted him to feel proud of that.

"Well how does it feel to interact with someone your own age who isn't a doctor?" Jack shrugged.

"She's fine. I mean we have a really cohesive sense of humor. I think if we did hang out, it wouldn't be awful but I'm pretty sure she's a nurse or something. She wears scrubs whenever she's not in regular clothes and when she's in regular clothes she's usually care-giving for her mom." Dr. Carty laughed making Jack tilt his head.

"You like her." He said confidently.

"What? No! We've had two conversations. That's hardly enough time to develop a liking to anyone." Jack defended.

"Haven't you ever heard of love at first sight?" Now Jack knew the doc was fucking with him.

"Yeah, thankfully I live in the real world. Plus everyone knows it's more like lust at first sight. No one can fall in love just seeing someone. That's based entirely on physical attraction." Jack was more of a pessimist when it came to love and attraction. Plenty of people could be attractive but love is few and far between. Jack can count on one hand how many people he's genuinely loved in his entire life.

"Well is she attractive?" Dr. Carty pressed.

"She's conventionally attractive, yes. I mean she hasn't cured my lack of sex drive but again, we've only spoken twice. I don't think I could fuck even if I wanted to." Jack had known the Doc for long enough that his random bouts of vulgarity didn't make him flinch.

"So you have decent conversation with a pretty woman who can match your intellect and has a dog you enjoy spending time with...She doesn't sound like an awful friend to make. Maybe you should work on that." Jack pushed away from the computer and ran his hands down his face.

"Why? I don't want to ruin anyone else's life. She's clearly a much better person than I am and she's already agreed to let me take the dog for walks on occasion so why risk ruining that with her getting to know me?" Jack genuinely feared letting anyone close at this point. Shanda had been with him since day one and the only person who has gotten a pass is the Doc and that wasn't something Jack asked for but has gotten used to.

"She's not Cleo, Jack." The mention of Cleo knocked the wind out of his chest.

"I know that." Jack whispered timidly before standing from his chair to move to the window.

"Just because you never received closure from her doesn't mean you can't move forward. You have done your part in taking accountability. We knew going into that you might not received the absolution of forgiveness." Dr. Carty himself had reached out to Cleo and was told she didn't care if Jack had dropped dead, she refused to talk to him after having their child cremated alone. Jack had sent a twenty page letter without any sort of response and when he sent a follow up, it was returned to sender.

The few times he dared to check social media, she had erased him from her entire existence. She had a memorial post for the baby but she didn't use his last name. When he accidentally liked one of her posts, he was met with a block on all outlets. Shanda had assured him that she had moved on and was doing better but he held onto that guilt for abandoning her after such a sudden miscarriage.

"What are you thinking Jack?" Doc's voice broke through his thoughts as he stood at the window. He could see Y/n down in her mother's garden watering the flowers and talking to her mom who was sitting in a wheelchair on the porch with Ace in her lap. He didn't need to know Y/n well to see she was a good person.

"The best thing she could do is to stay away from me. I'm just...I don't deserve that again. I wasted it the first time and ruined someone's life. What would I even do if I allowed myself to find that with someone else after Cleo? How do I explain to someone what I did to someone I loved enough to want to marry and start a family with?" Jack's ranting started to make his chest hurt.

"Jack, I want you to close your eyes and take a deep breath." Jack became annoyed but did as he was told counting in his head as he took a few deep breaths.

"You need to remember that we are not our mistakes. We all have flaws and blemishes but it's how we right our wrongs that define us. You are not a bad person." Jack opened his eyes feeling a slight burn from squeezing them so tightly. Jack let out a breath before digging in his pocket for a lighter, picking up a cigarette and opening the window abruptly. The daylight made it hard for his eyes to adjust at first but he didn't realize the sound of the window would draw any attention towards him. He was met with Y/n's gaze as he took a deep drag of his cigarette.

"You have to forgive yourself Jack. If you don't let go of that weight, it will drown you." Jack kept his eyes on Y/n as she smiled at him and waved. Jack returned a weak smile, biting his lip.

"I want to...I really do but I just don't think I can." Jack admitted out loud glancing over at the screen to see Dr. Carty was frowning. He hated ending his sessions on a such a negative feeling but he knew he was out of time today. He knew that Doc didn't want to leave him alone with these thoughts so he gave him self work to do over the weekend so it would keep him occupied. Self work always made him roll his eyes because he could knock assignments out easily but whenever he sat down to work on his writing, his mind would be blank. All he wanted to do was figure out how to feel normal again.

[shiveringsoldier]

mash and/or becket for the fandom meme

I'll do M*A*S*H. Thank you!

My favorite female character

Margaret by default. I wish there had been more than one woman in the main cast, but Margaret has some very satisfying character growth. As a bonus, my favorite minor/one-off female characters are Soon-Lee, Kyung-Soon, and Helen

My favorite male character

Hawkeye. I have nothing to say about him that hasn't been said already; he's just a wonderful character

My favorite book/season/etc

I go back and forth between season 3 and season 5. Season 3 is when the show really finds its footing. It has some landmarks with the first episode of the show to not feature a laugh track and the first episode of any sitcom to kill off a main character. It also has a great comfort episode in "Springtime" and the criminally underrated "Bulletin Board." Season 5 has just the right blend of comedy and drama. It has one of the best Sidney episodes with "Dear Sigmund," and it really hones in on Margaret's development. Season 5 is a turning point for both her and Hawkeye; as Margaret starts to grow and improve, Hawkeye (or more specifically his mental health) starts to take a turn for the worse.

My favorite episode (if it's a TV show)

I'm cheating and saying two. I adore "Dr. Pierce and Mr. Hyde" for the same reasons you highlighted here, and I love "Dear Sis." When Mulcahy's anger issues are brought up in the show, it's mostly played for laughs, but "Dear Sis" takes it seriously. He assaults a patient, and that has personal repercussions. Also, the scene when the 4077th sings Dona Nobis Pacem in the mess tent makes me cry almost every time.

My favorite cast member

Alan Alda by default. I don't know most of the cast members' lives outside of the show, but Alan Alda has had such an interesting and eclectic career. I like his podcast, although I haven't listened to it in a good while, and I like his memoir Never Have Your Dog Stuffed: And Other Things I've Learned. It has a killer opening sentence.

My favorite ship

Hawkeye and Trapper maybe, although I don't have any serious ships. I love their yes/and comedy dynamic, and I love how much they clearly care about each other

A character I’d die defending

Klinger - not from the fandom but from the show. He is subjected to more and more racism as the show progresses, whether it's jokes about his nose or the abhorrent "Goodbye, Cruel World." His pivot from a man desperate to escape the Army to a moneygrubber makes absolutely no sense to me, and that feels rooted in racism as well. And it sucks that he is subjected to so much cruelty when he is perhaps the most consistently kind and selfless character in the show.

A character I just can’t sympathize with

Flagg. I don't even enjoy him as a comedic character some of the time. Some of his episodes I like ("The Abduction of Margaret Houlihan" makes me laugh very hard every time), but other episodes I can't stand.

A character I grew to love

Charles. I still don't love him as much as some of the fandom loves him - I think his bigotry is much deeper and more insidious than Frank's, and it seems like neither the fandom nor the show is willing to call him out - but man does he have a good arc. I didn't like him at first, but I eventually warmed up to him. David Ogden Stiers is just so good in the part. Also, his plot in the series finale is my favorite and the one that left the biggest impact on me, although that could be because I didn't know anything about his plot while other plots had been spoiled for me. I don't think I'll ever recover from the "He wasn't even a soldier. He was a musician" scene.

My anti OTP

I'm glad the show had the sense to not make Margaret and Hawkeye a couple; they're much better as friends and wouldn't be suitable romantic partners. In terms of ships I've seen in the fandom, I can't get behind Charles/Klinger at all. I know they have some moments of connection in the show (I love their last scene in "Death Takes a Holiday"), but I don't understand why people are shipping Klinger, a Lebanese, working-class man, with someone as egregiously racist and classist as Charles.

[im-out-of-it]

RANT ABOUT SHOW MALEC AND THOMASTAIR AND IT IS LONG AND IM NOT TRYING TO BE HATEFUL BUT ITS THINGS IVE NOTICED OF A PATTERN AND MY BEEF IS MORE WITH CC BEAUSE SHE RUINS EVERYTHING WITH HER OBSESSION WITH HERONDALES AND PUTTING MY FAVS IN THR BACKSEAT

I still have a bunch of TLH content to go through and make stupid opinions about but while I was watching another show, I keep noticing a pattern of when it comes to lgbtq+ couples, that one of the couples is barely their own person like even their intimate scenes don’t get as much attention as to an heterosexual couple. and it made me think of Alastair and Thomas. especially since CC can’t write, Alastair does not get any moments that are just about him. and I notice this happening in the show for Magnus. y’all know I love show Malec and I love the show (for anyone besides CLACE) but why is it that

1. lgbtq+ couples rarely have intimate scenes?

and

2. why is being gay their whole identity?

it makes me absolutely furious that Alastair has literally one fucking pov and it barely covers his rage and his feelings about his deadbeat father. Alastair lost his fucking childhood having to take care of his father and make sure Cordelia has a good life and there’s no mention or appropriation for Alastair pov?

we already know that CC doesn’t care about her POC characters and relationships but it’s just as bad when they’re part of the lgbtq+ community. even Thomas’s stuff gets taken over by James and Cordelia. the whole James and Cordelia shit takes center stage so does matthews addiction, Thomas losing so much in one year, Alastair doesn’t get to process anything, Lucie and Cordelia’s friendship is rushed and they shouldn’t be parabatai, Ari and Anna are also super rushed and it seems they don’t actually communicate their issues- and Grace (who I cannot stand) doesn’t actually process her trauma. nor does Jesse. literally nobody gets to process anything because it has to be the Cordelia and James show. Matthew is made to apologize for feelings he may have had (I just don’t buy their connection) for Cordelia so James can have the girl. I don’t have that much hate for James as compared to jace and Will but that is a terrible fucking parabatai move.

why are all parabatai have one set who goes above and beyond while the other just settles? and worst of all, Kit doesn’t get grieved because once again!!!!!!! guess who has to be center stage? JAMES OBVIOUSLY

and what makes me mad about show Malec is that Magnus doesn’t have many friends after he gets with Alec. he’s hardly with his warlocks and spends most of the time saving jace because he knows what it means to Alec. before Malec get together, Alec is more snarky and calls out people (and he still does after.) while Magnus seems to express himself more in makeup, outfits, and he’s made his warlocks more of a focus. and then once he gets with Alec, the makeup is heavily changed, he spends more of his time helping shadowhunters until the season two finale. where the fuck is Catarina? she’s hardly there for the rest of the two seasons. he’s lost ragnor already but where are his warlock friends? why can’t Alec continue to be sassy and call out people more? why does he let jace use him?

and this has nothing to do with how Matt and Harry portrayed Alec and Magnus. I love them both and they did so much for Malec that we didn’t get in the books and I’m sure this was on the writing side. I’m sure they wanted to keep it as much as the book lore they possibly could but does this make anyone else mad? why do heterosexual couples get to have full on sex scenes but Malec can hardly kiss without 30 seconds????? why can’t Magnus’s feelings about reliving his trauma he more than an episode or however long it was? why does Alec have to pay for so much in the series? why can James and Cordelia have pages and pages of sex scenes (as well as CLACE in the books) but Alastair and Thomas get one page of it while everyone has to listen in to book malec and their arguing.

and my whole problem is with CC. she’s a terrible writer but I also feel that the show could’ve done more with the Malec buildup and actually focusing on Magnus and Alec as characters. Magnus isn’t just Alec’s boyfriend but he’s 800+ warlock who has trauma, who is kind, patient, friendly, who does everything he can for the downworld because that’s his children and family. Alec isn’t just Magnus’s boyfriend but someone who has been pushed around so many times, has toxic friends, who hasn’t felt like himself basically all his life.

I don’t know why I made this rant but I hate seeing my fav lgbtq+ treated badly at times or seeing how heterosexual couples get more page/screen time and get to do whatever while all the problems go to the lgbtq+ characters. and maybe some won’t agree with me and I’m not being hateful about it all. I’m happy with what we got with thomastair and Malec but TLH could’ve been so much better in Alastair’s pov and if the show focused more on Malec and less on CLACE

and I will always be so appreciative of the show for what they did for Malec like y’all have no idea how much I love show Malec and everything we got but so much was left out, ya know? and thomastair was great but Alastair gets left behind and Thomas kind of goes through an Alec thing where James issues become more important than his own. Thomas was arrested and the pov was in James. I’m also just tired of the “I’m angry because I’m gay and that’s my whole thing” or “I’m his boyfriend and that’s all I am identity” or “the heterosexual couple gets more time because we deem them more important than the gays” OR “let the gays have all the issues to prove they can get through anything” not all of these examples pertain to what I’m talking about but these tropes are just as bad as the bury your gays. I want more.

Thomas loses Christopher who is more of a parabatai to him, his sister, almost loses Alexander, plus Alastair all within a year

Alec has to deal with an arranged marriage, the person who is supposed to have his back is betraying him, all the “feelings” he may have had with Jace, the treatment he got from Maryse and Robert, the lying, his brother almost dying, almost losing Izzy, dying almost five times total, losing Magnus twice, all the lies he got from his family and friends, seeing Magnus go through his trauma and feeling at fault all within a year

Alastair has to deal with not having a childhood, losing deadbeat father, his mother having a new baby, feelings for Thomas but not feeling good enough, not able to process any of these emotions, and getting mistreated from Cordelia all within a year

Magnus has to deal with centuries of pain, not having two fathers and a mother because two of them deemed him a monster while the other attempted to show Magnus how powerful he is, watching Alec almost die many times, having to relive his trauma, being hunted by Valentine, downworlders dying and he couldn’t do anything, losing his home, his magic, and then Alec TWICE all within a year

these men go through so much and for fucking what? LEAVE THEM BE

I don’t know, rant over I guess

[14buddy22]

I’ll Spend the Rest of My Life Making It Up To You Series

Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Proposals, Kissing, Mentions of sex, engagements, angst, weddings, domestic abuse, bruises, guilt, mentions of death

A/n: Part 2!! If you want to be tagged in future parts, let me know! If I missed anything in the warnings, let me know!

WC: 4.2K

Series Masterlist // Masterlist

**13 years ago**

You and Aaron were celebrating your 2 year anniversary. You had been friends for much longer than that, you were one of Sean’s friends growing up, however, you always got along with Aaron. You don’t know why, but you did. You knew everything there was to know about Aaron and it made you even better partners when you finally did start dating because of it.

When you say “celebrating” it was more like, you two just woke up that morning on your anniversary, not yet begun any festivities. It was nice that he was away from the FBI academy for the weekend so you two could just spend some time together.

You planned your 1 year anniversary, but Aaron wanted to plan your 2 year anniversary. It was nice to know that he could plan things and know everything would turn out okay. You didn’t feel the need to overstep your boundary to help him plan because you knew everything would be perfect, whatever he planned.

And it was. Everything he did plan for your 2-year anniversary was perfect.

After getting out of bed after some morning festivities with Aaron, you both showered for the day and walked to a local breakfast shop that you two both loved ever since you two were kids. It was family-run, so you only appreciated the food and hard work even more.

After breakfast, he decided to take you shopping at your local bookstore. You were a nerd for books. After Aaron let you spend more money on yourself than you’ve ever spent on yourself, you two decided to go home and curl up on the couch while he watched a golfing event and you read your book.

It was very peaceful. You appreciated every moment you had with Aaron, especially since being a lawyer had him constantly busy so you never knew when the next time was that you were going to have him to yourself with no caseloads.

“Aaron?”

“Yeah?”

He stopped watching the TV and turned to look at you. You loved that he would stop whatever he was doing to pay attention to you. It shows that he was willing to listen and that you were important too.

“What’s going to happen to us? Are we going to stay together forever? Will we get bored of each other? Will we get married? Will we have 6 Hotchner kids running around?”

“Honey, I don’t know what’s in store for us. I just know that I see myself spending the rest of my life with you. There’s no one else for me. I want you and all your perfections for the rest of my life. If we get married, we get married. If we have kids, maybe not 6, we have kids.”

“Hey! You’ve known since you and I first hung out alone without Sean that I’ve wanted 6 kids.”

“Yeah, and I hoped every day from that point on that I’d be the one to give you 6 kids.”

He smirked at you and you thought it was the hottest thing ever. He knew it was an absolute turn-on for you when he talked about giving you, kids. He was very possessive as well, he wanted your kids to be ones he helped create and raise.

“You and I have nothing to worry about. It’ll be you and me together forever. I’m crazy about you. I’d do anything for you. You’re my girl and I love you.”

As you began to kiss Aaron, long forgetting about the TV show he was watching and the book you were reading. It quickly turned into a heated makeout session and turned into something more.

It was later in the evening that you and Aaron finally began to get ready for your date night. When you finished getting ready and walked out into your living room to meet him, his eyes immediately roamed over your body. You’d seen him speechless only a few times, but the way he was looking at you, you knew if you didn’t leave soon, your plans would be ruined as would all your makeup and outfit.

“Come on, Aar. We can’t be late. Put your tongue in your mouth and stop drooling.”

When you walked over to give Aaron a kiss on his lips, he whispered, “You look gorgeous.”

He was the biggest hypeman known to mankind. He made you feel good in whatever it was you were doing. If you were starting to read a book, he’d hype you up to finish it so you could tell him all about it. If you wore an outfit that was brand new, he’d hype you up like you were the best supermodel to walk the Earth.

He truly was the best man you’d ever known. You loved Sean as your friend, but dating Aaron was just different. You got to know everything about Aaron, things Sean didn’t know.

“Are you ready to go, gorgeous?”

“Yes, Aaron. Let’s go. We can’t be late.”

You and Aaron went out to a restaurant and after sharing a meal with your handsome boyfriend, he decided to go out to a bar afterward. It was one of your favorite bars near a college town. They did karaoke on Wednesdays and Saturday nights and it was filled with a bunch of locals. The way you went, they all knew you by now, but Aaron, they’d only seen a couple of times.

He wasn’t that big on karaoke, but if it’s something you loved and he knew that. You weren’t a good singer by any means but you still did love to sing just for the fun of it. Aaron loved to see you singing your heart out with the locals.

What he really loved was just to see you happy.

He signed you and him up for a duet and when you tried to ask him what song, he kept saying, “You’ll see.”

When you looked over at him, watching him take a sip of his beer, you chuckled softly as you took his hand in yours.

When you kissed his hand, you began laughing at the friend group singing right then and there. You leaned into him and then you and he began singing with everyone else, just laughing and having a good time.

Soon, it was yours and Aaron’s turn to sing. He had chosen Love Story, by Taylor Swift. When you smiled at him, you began to sing. Both of you are love-struck with each other.

You began to sing, “I got tired of waiting. Wondering if you were ever coming around. My faith in you was fading. When I met you on the outskirts of town. And I said Romeo save me, I’ve been feeling so alone. I keep waiting for you but you never come. Is this in my head, I don’t know what to think.”

Just as you turned to Aaron, he began to sing, “I knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring”. At that moment, everyone in the bar sang the rest of the song while Aaron had a ring out and he was down on one knee.

It was a dream proposal come true. You knew right then and there you wanted to spend the rest of your life with him. He picked up on little things; how you loved the bar you were at, how you absolutely fell in love with this song when it first came out.

Now, 13 years later, you were sitting in Aaron’s office. He had just told you that you’re the strongest person he’d ever met, yet he doesn’t know half of what you went through. You don’t even know how he could say that to you when he’s the strongest person you’d ever met. He went through abuse from a parent. His wife died from a serial killer he was hunting. If anything, Aaron should have commented on how you were a coward. It took you 10 years to come forward.

“Aaron. How could I be the strongest person you ever met? It has taken me 10 years to come forward about Jake. I hid everything. I covered up what he did to me. Aaron, I had his baby. I love Mason, so much. But what if that gets passed to Mason.”

“No, no, it won’t get passed to Mason because you’re raising him. You know I grew up in that situation.”

He’s right. If anything, you were looking at a prime example of how you wanted your son to turn out. Aaron was strong. He endured the pain much later in his childhood.

“It was worse for you, Jake never touched him. I just don’t want Mason to turn into Jake someday.”

As far as you knew, Jake never laid a hand on Mason. You wanted to keep it that way. You’re just glad Mason wasn’t old enough to experience the trauma that you went through. That’s what made you realize you needed to get out of that relationship.

“Some grow up to be killers, but some grow up to catch them. I grew up to catch them because I wanted to save people like my mom and Sean. Mason is going to grow up knowing what it feels like to be loved. I didn’t feel that often until you came into my life.”

“I just don’t want Mason to grow up and be angry at me.”

You began to cry in front of Aaron again. You didn’t care. This was the first time you’ve cried in front of a man in 12 years. The last time was in front of Aaron, but in a different situation. He was the one who broke your heart. It’s funny how you cried to him about a man when 12 years ago, you were the one crying about him.

**12 Years Ago**

Aaron had walked into your shared apartment. Slowly, closing the door, he was quietly searching to see if you were in the living area or in the kitchen. When he saw you were in neither place, he called out your name.

“In the bedroom, honey.”

When Aaron loosened his tie on the way to his bedroom, it was like he was doing a walk of shame. His head was hung low, his eyes already glossed over. You wouldn’t know why for about 2 more minutes.

“Hey honey, sorry. I’m just putting laundry away.”

You kissed him and watched him walk into the bathroom. Maybe it was just a bad day. You know that it happened to him a lot, you didn’t blame him. If you were in his position, you don’t think you’d be able to handle it as well as he did some days.

You wanted to get his mind off of it so you wanted to start talking about your wedding, which was only two months away from the exact date.

“Aaron, look what came in today. The final piece for the centerpieces came. I’ve been messing around with them and there are a few ways I’d like to see them displayed on the tables. I have a couple of them set up. Can you help me decide on them?”

You watched Aaron come out of the bathroom slowly, still not sure how you were going to help him. You wanted to help him in any way you can since he’s always been there for you.

“Come here, look.”

You grabbed his hand and you felt him tense at your touch. That had never happened before. You would have noticed it before if he tensed at your touch, wouldn’t you?

“Aaron, what’s going on?”

“I’m sorry. I can’t. We can’t do this.”

You don’t know if you heard him right. What does he mean by ‘we can’t do this’. You were hoping that you’d be able to talk him out of whatever was going to happen.

“We need to break off the engagement?”

“What?”

“I can’t keep you safe. My job is too much. I can’t lose you. There’s too much bad in this world, Y/n. You’re the one good thing that I don’t want them to take from it. If we break it off now, I won’t lose you. Our kids won’t grow up without a mom. I just, can’t do this. I can’t feel this guilt if something were to ever happen to you. I already feel guilty enough that I bring home my dark and gray world when it clashes with your bright, color-filled world. I don’t want to be the one who brings you down. I don’t want you to be taken from this world, you’re the only good thing in it.”

You wanted to say so much, but you didn’t. You were caught off guard. You were beginning to break down and cry, but you didn’t want him to see you like this. You silently just nodded your head, wiped his tear and he whispered, “Please say something.”

You took off the ring he’d given to you. All the memories of your time with him flooding back to your brain, the proposal, all the wedding prep, it just broke you down even more. When you packed a bag, he followed you around like a lost puppy. He wanted this. You couldn’t do anything about it, there were no words that could come out of your mouth.

“I’m going to stay at Sean’s for tonight. I’ll be back to get my things in the morning. I’ll be moved out by the afternoon. I’ll take all the wedding stuff and send it back. You won’t have to worry about anything.”

Thinking back, that was the downfall of it all. Aaron would never forgive himself. You wouldn’t forgive yourself for not fighting harder. But, he deserved someone more. You always thought he had that with Haley until she died. You realized that every time he cried after her death, it could have been you he was crying over.

The only problem was. The minute you walked into his office, clearly disturbed, he felt guilty. When you told him everything that happened to you, he felt guilty, and heartbroken, because when you two split up, you met Jake.

Your abuser.

Had Aaron never broken your heart, you would have never been abused. You would have felt love. You would’ve been safe with him. Maybe had he stayed with you, Foyet never would’ve happened. But then he wouldn’t have Jack and you wouldn’t have Mason.

You and he could've had babies running around. But no, he broke your heart. You suffered through years of domestic violence, and he couldn’t see anything wrong every time you guys met up for lunch. You were the greatest con artist he could ever meet.

He would never forgive himself for not seeing that you were in a domestic relationship. He was a profiler, being played every time you two went out for lunch. It only made him think back to a few of your lunches, trying to pinpoint where something should have been off, if you were secretly trying to tell him something, that wouldn’t have given it away to the average person but should have given it away to the one person who cared about you the most.

“Mason is going to turn out just fine. He’s going to see how strong his mother is. He is being raised by the greatest woman in the entire world.”

“And what about me? I have no one, Aaron. I have no one to help me. I’m alone, I’m scared. Jake’s got more money than I could even think of. His dad is a lawyer for god’s sake. I don’t know what I’m going to do. I’m a teacher. I don’t have mounds of money laying around to get the best lawyer in the world.”

“You have me. Okay, you have me, you have my team. My team, believe it or not, is the dream team. We will take care of you. I’m going to take care of you. Right now, I need you to trust me. Please. Let me help you.”

“Okay. Okay. But I owe you everything. I owe you so-”

“No, no. You don’t owe me anything. It’s my fault you’re in this position. Had I never broken your heart, broken off the engagement, Jake would have never happened.”

You looked at Mason then looked back up at Aaron. With tears in your eyes, all you could see was your lover. The one you wanted to marry all those years ago. The one you wish would have objected at your and Jake’s wedding when the officiant said something along the lines of “speak now or forever hold your piece”.

You remember searching the crowd when the officiant said that, praying to whoever was listening that Aaron would say something. Even when you locked eyes with him, you watched him sit forward slightly, the wind looked like it was knocked out of him, and just when you held your breath, you watched him lean back in his seat, an apology filling his eyes.

“Hon-, we have to get you to the hospital. I need you to have an exam. Please.”

“I don’t want him to get to Mason.”

“He will never get Mason, I will promise you that. Please. Let me help you. You can trust me.”

“Yeah? How could I? When I trusted you, you broke my heart.”

Okay, that was really uncalled for. You know Aaron feels guilty enough, but you didn’t care. When he broke off the engagement, you met Jake shortly after. Is it your fault for not getting out sooner? Many would think it is, but it’s hard being in an abusive relationship, especially when you don’t even notice it at first.

“Aaron, I’m sorry, that was uncalled for. I know I can trust you, I’m just, I’m on edge. You wouldn’t know this.”

“Hey. Hey. Slow down. I’m not mad. I deserved that. It’s been 12 years since I broke off the engagement. In fact, today should have been our 12-year wedding anniversary.”

When he looked at you, you saw the tears forming in his eyes, slowly keeping himself together. He couldn’t break down, not in front of you. You were an abused woman, and yet he was on the verge of tears.

“I’m going to get you the help you need. My friend is taking the case pro bono. He owes me a favor, so he’s repaying me. You’re going to stay with Jack and me until Jake’s in prison. You’re not going back to get everything until he’s in custody or my team goes with you. When my team goes with, Mason will be in an FBI vehicle, surrounded by armed agents.”

“Aaron.”

“Let me help you.”

“Okay. Okay. It all started right before the wedding.”

Someone knocked on the door and Aaron’s heart slowly broke more and more when he watched you flinch. Aaron stood up to grab the door, hand on the gun that was on his hip. When he saw it was Rossi, he looked at you and said, “It’s Dave, it’s okay.”

Dave came in and you saw him holding the photo of you and Aaron.

“The tracking device is disabled from your car, we’re going to leave the vehicle at the building and give you a rental. This way, we know for sure you won’t be tracked and he can’t track the license plate.”

“Thank you, Dave.”

“Hotch, can I have a word with you?”

“Yeah. Y/n, stay here with Mason, you’re safe here. I promise nothing is going to happen to you. Stay in the office, here, Dave, help me move the coffee table so Mason can do some tummy time. I’m going to the office right next door, then, you know what I’m going to ask you when we come back. I’m going to need you to tell us everything.”

You weren’t ready to tell Aaron. You thought you were, but you weren’t.

“I’ll tell him, everything.”

Dave looked at Aaron and said, “That’s fine, you don’t have to tell me.”

“No. Dave, I’m going to tell you everything. Aaron, you’re going to have to go with your team, because, I’m just not ready to tell you yet. I can’t see the reaction on your face, Aar. It’ll break you even more than me showing up today, battered and littered with bruises and trauma.”

Aaron just nodded and you realized that was another dagger to his heart. When he walked out with Rossi, you laid Mason’s blanket on the ground with some toys and sat next to Mason. Mason was reaching for the toys and beginning to smile. It just allowed you some time to break down, without Aaron in front of you.

“When were you going to tell us you two were engaged?”

“I wanted to, but I didn’t want to tell her. Where did you even get that picture?”

Aaron took the picture of you and him from that bar when he proposed and saw the ring taped to it. Emotions and memories flooded his brain and all he could think was how bad he messed up life for you. Breaking off that engagement led to you being abused. That was two women he had lost. He lost you first and then he lost Haley. He will always have a special place in his heart for Haley, she’s the mother of his child, but you, you were and are so much more than that. You were the one he wanted to have 6 kids with. You were the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with until he messed that all up.

Rossi looked at Aaron and said, “If she doesn’t want you in the room when she talks about what happened to her, you can’t be in the room. You know that Aaron.”

“She’s scared Dave. I have to protect her now more than ever.”

Aaron walked back into his office and he just stopped and admired you talking and playing with Mason. He knew you’d be an amazing mother. You were always great with the neighbor’s kids when you two lived together. You often would leave work and would pick the neighbor’s kids up from school and daycare and bring them home. Your neighbor was a single dad with three kids. You felt bad they didn’t have a mother figure, so you tried to help when you can, not overstepping. You always thought about what happened to those kids. The oldest one would be 18 now, the youngest one being 14.

Then your phone began to ring, and it broke Aaron out of whatever trance he was in. Fear flashed before your eyes and Aaron caught it.

“It’s okay. Who is it?’

“It’s him, Aaron.”

Aaron said, “You’re going to answer. Keep him talking for as long as you can.”

He opened his office door and shouted for Penelope to track the phone call. His team came around him and Penelope came into the office and sat at the desk. Aaron sat next to you on the floor and said, “Answer, it’s okay. I’m right here. Nothing can happen to you anymore.”

You picked up the phone with shaky hands. All that was grounding you was holding Aaron’s hand and looking at your son. The only two boys in the world you trusted in that moment.

“Hey honey.”

“Y/n, where’d you go. I thought you weren’t doing anything this weekend?”

“I went to visit a friend. I’m staying the night at their place.”

“No. I want you home, now. You didn’t ask to spend the night, you didn’t say anything, it also looks like we’ve been robbed. Don’t lie to me. I know where you are. You’re with Aaron. Aren’t you? Your one and only true love, huh?”

“Yes, I’m visiting him. Aaron’s wife passed away and his son is having a really hard time and so is he. I was best friends with him, Jake. You have to realize that before you, it was Aaron and I as friends.”

“No. No. You’re cheating on me, aren’t you? I always suspected it. You were a slut before I met you. You’re being a slut now. You want a reason to stay away? I’ll give you one. I’ll kill you before you even have the chance to come home.”

Before you could say anything, the line went dead. Fear had struck you. He knows where you are, he knows you’re with Aaron. The last thing you wanted to do was endanger Aaron.

You let go of Aaron and put your phone on the ground.

“He knows where I am, Aaron. He said he was going to kill me before I had the chance to come home. I’m going to die and he’ll get custody of my son, I’m scared, Aaron.”

You began to fall apart. Tears ran down your face and before you could begin to wipe them, Aaron pulled your body against his, and rubbed your back. It only made everything worse when Aaron saw a bruise on your face that your hair had been covering, the scratch mark that ran down your neck, and the words from Penelope, “He’s on his way here.”

Next Part

Tagging: @lex13cm @rousethemouse​

[shaanks]

2-24 even for Shanks 💕

Oh my goodness, thank you bby!! Y'all are gonna hear about Shanks today lmfao. Most of this is gonna be under a readmore bc I've never been able to be succinct but here we goooooo!

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

I love how careful he is about when and how he flexes all that power he has. It was meant to be very on the nose when we were introduced to him via Luffy in the very beginning of the series, but like. His little episode on Whitebeard's ship seemed like he had conqueror's haki out of control, but it was a very purposeful flex, if for nothing else than to show that he took approaching another Yonko seriously. Or the way he chose to handle Greenbull at the end of Wano. Sure it was hard to the new folks on his crew to handle exposure so suddenly, but he sent that like 50 miles out from the ship and hit that jerk in the heart with it. And never even raised his voice about it. Idk I think his restraint and how it manifests is a really interesting part of his characterization.

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

it's probably on my mind bc of Bernard Hill's recent passing, but I think Shanks would do so well and have a grand old time being elusive and mysterious in Lord of the Rings lmfao. He's got that Aragorn quality of could be in his 20s could be in his 40s who knows, he and Gandalf would probably get a kick out of each other, he'd fucking love the hobbits I am telling you this. (he also, I am very afraid, has that Aragorn quality of 'doomed by the narrative just not quite yet,' but we'll see.)

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

this is hard, I think he's a much more complex and interesting person than I am for the most part, but like. I think it's safe to say he'd mostly rather diffuse a situation than have it become serious when the latter is avoidable, and I am that way too. If the situation is already serious and requires a throw down response that's a different matter, but if we can avoid a serious fight in favor of a little tussle and some drinks, that'd be the way he'd go, and I agree.

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?

take this one with a grain of salt bc I mostly try not to yuck anyone's yum or argue about differing headcanons, but I really do not fucking like the like. scumbag/villain!Shanks thing that seems to have a semi-popular following. some of that is personal bias, as I think he is a warm, good person who is doing his best, but it also kind of feels like a betrayal of the narrative for him. which I realize is funny coming from the "everything is made up including the source material" guy but here we are. there was a period a few months ago where people were basically just writing him as OP Toji and it made me want to pull all my hair out.

10. Could you be best friends with this character?

absolutely, I adore him, I think he's right about a lot of things, our ethics tend to line up where it matters, I think he's funny and would be fun to be around, he listens well and is a warm and compassionate person. I really like him and we'd get along really well I think. (mostly probably through the lens of my OC bc I'm not like. terribly convinced of my actual in person IRL likeability but in theory, absolutely yes.)

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

I've written about it a little before, but I think the reason he let Buggy go without telling him what Roger talked to him about after the execution wasn't because he didn't want Buggy with him anymore or didn't believe he had what it took to complete that mission, but so that Buggy would have a chance to forge his own way and have his own life. Doing what Roger asked necessitated Shanks--who was widely regarded as having the potential to be the next big legend--to drop out of the running almost entirely. He picked up his crew, he made a name for himself, he became the youngest person (at the time) to gain the title of Yonko, but he also spent a decent amount of time having to like. Lay low on beaches and dick around in the East Blue and play balance keeper and chess master until the man Roger was waiting for appeared. There are more spoilery additions to this that I'll leave out for now but yeah. I think he knew Buggy had all that same potential, and wanted to give him an opportunity to strike out on his own adventure without living in that shadow or carrying their mentor's ghost around.

14. Assign a fashion aesthetic to this character.

oh take this one with a grain of salt too idk that I know any of the terms correctly lmfao but he's very like. when I picture boho in my mind that seems very him. a lot of linens a lot of light flowy breathable clothes. It's pirate!Boho obviously but like. The man is out there wearing birkenstocks as we speak js.

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

same standard issue disclaimer as the fandom stuff I don't like, this isn't to yuck anyone's yum, follow your bliss what people ship isn't my business, these are just the ones I personally do not like. shankslu is at the forefront, but I don't really do shanksbenn either?? a LOT of captains and first mates in this series read that way to me but those two don't for me.

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire?

I actually really enjoy his dynamic with Marco. There are some interesting pieces of shared history there but overall the like. Friendly ribbing, amiable hanging out and willingness to cooperate between two of my faves is always very nice to see. c:

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?

oh please I think he'd think Sabo was a ton of fun. I know there's an age difference there that makes peership a little different than between the other mid-40s dudes he usually hangs out with, but think about it. Two very powerful people who are carrying the weight of part of this new era on their shoulders, who have a habit of just sort of fucking off out of the narrative and doing things as they please within their own personal parameters, who will just get up and obliterate a guy when that's what the situation calls for? Funny, weird, intelligent guys that love Luffy, believe in him, and want whats best for him? Even if they weren't besties, I think there's a lot of fun overlap for general friendship there.

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to this character? Something you don't like?

something I like: when people recognize that all that soft puppy silly goofy guy exterior, while sincerely part of him, is something that he makes the decision to externalize every day, and is sat atop a deep well of like. sadness and responsibility. there are a lot of people doing a very good job making him a romantic dopey nightmare man without sacrificing that silliness or his intelligence and sense of personal responsibility.

something I don't like: when people start a fic with the disclaimer "Shanks is in here but I hate him lol so he's a lil ooc 🤭🤪" and then he's like. not only ooc but just someone's ex boyfriend or doflamingo or just off-screen doing heinous shit for no reason. Writing a character you hate: can be fun and compelling! I fucking hate Doflamingo, for example, but as a narrative device, as a villain? bar none one of the best and most interesting. Writing a character you hate with the intention of doing a shit job because you hate them? dumb, annoying, and a waste of everyone's time. why include someone you don't want to write about lmfao just pick a different character and be done.

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?

i'm drawing a blank, I'm going to be real with you. Like, I can think of a ton of mentor characters, but they don't really remind me of him. I can think of a bunch of like. guardian of the new era characters, that still don't super remind me of him. I think again i've got LOTR on the brain rn but the like. Fellowship of the Ring Aragorn is the closest I'm coming up with and even that's mostly in terms of like. the gentle mentorship of the hobbits, the offbeat sense of humor, and that dedication to a responsibility that he might have been scared to face. IDK. Shanks is a pretty unique guy to me. I'm sure I'm gonna sit bolt upright at 3 AM with a list of 20 people that fit the bill but rn it simply isn't clicking lmfao.

And there we have it!!! My (mostly) comprehensive analysis of Shanks, for you my dear friend. Thank you so much for asking!!!

[pluttskutt]

Writeblr Interview

thanks @tildeathiwillwrite for the tag!

Short stories, novels, or poems?

I naturally write novels. It's not a flex, but it's the fact that the side plots I come up with go beyond what I imagined at the start so suddenly we're 100k in and the main conflict hasn't begun yet. Ha.

What genre do you prefer reading?

Depends! I read "All the Bright Places" and "Hearstopper" for research when writing my own teen love story and I enjoyed them both. Growing up, I was an avid fantasy devourer but ever since they went from children's book -> YA I lost interest.

Are you a planner or a write as I go kind of person?

I always start with a plot and MC's but what happens is kind of up to the characters in the way that they shape the story. I tend to have at least two points I want to hit (a secret comes out, A meets E that will be important later etc) but how I get there is up to the characters.

I'm not a slave to them, but they drive the story forward but how they interact. An impatient character may break into a place, certain of their cause, only for it to be the wrong place, which would be a different story than one who waits and breaks into the right place.

Both are valid and will lead to them being chased by the law, but one fits the character and the other doesn't.

What music do you listen to while writing?

I have character and WIP playlists on Spotify that I listen to. If I'm writing something new that I'm unsure about I use YouTube to search for ambiance to help me picture the scene.

Favorite books/movies?

"All the Bright Places" was so good it made it to my favourites. There's a Swedish book series I read when I was younger that was called "(the) Circle" (translated) about witches I enjoyed a lot as a teen.

When it comes to movies I tend to enjoy the ones where music plays a big part like Disney musicals, the Greatest Showman, Shrek, Wonder Woman.

Any current WIPs?

Yes! A lot! I talk briefly about them in my pinned post.

Create a character description of yourself:

No thank you.

Do you like incorporating actual people you know into your writing?

In a way. I draw inspiration from those around me when creating certain characters. One time, I just took a name from my then-BFF onto the MC's BFF to make me think of our relationship so the character's would feel like real BFF's.

Are you kill happy with your characters?

Not happy but "meh" about it. There are times when the plot has them die. They are nothing but puppets. and I am their master.

Coffee or Tea while writing?

Neither. I drink water.

Slow or fast writer?

Slow. I set the mood with music, play Solitaire when I'm not sure how to proceed, and delete a lot of what I write before I'm satisfied. I've deleted 3k long scenes before.

If you were in a fantasy world, what would you be?

I don't know! Everything! Mermaids are beautiful with long hair, but I'd also love to be a dryad and run through the woods jumping over obstacles since I can barely walk now, and I'd love to ride a gryphon.

I think I'd be an elf who goes on adventures and gets to experience all of it. I'd even be the champion if It meant no brain damage.

Most fav book cliche:

I don't know. I don't read a lot, ha. True love's kiss I guess.

Least favorite cliche:

Characters who hate each other with the guy being an absolute bully and the girl starts to like him ???

Favorite scene to write?

Emotional ones! Sad, lethargic, happy, etc. Like a doom scene where everything goes wrong and the surviving characters are left with emptyness and the betrayal of one they considered a friend who caused it.

Character A holding onto B in desperation as B dangles over a black hole, both knowing B won't survive.

A species that has lived underground for generations sends someone up to test if the surface is okay every now and then. Now that they do, this one comes face to face with a beast known only in books.

Scenes like that.

Reason for writing?

Easiest way to get the characters out my head. I couldn't ever get the hang of drawing as a child, so writing it was. Also, comments on Ao3 are the only proof I have of being good at anything.

I leave this as an open tag for anyone wanting to do it!

[bestworstcase]

a present, for you- another salem meme! (also ironically while rewatching this episode to find a good enough screenshot i thought of salem as cain while listening to the brothers telling her about her curse; but i'm not actually a christian so you probably know what possible allusions she could have better than me)

HRGDHSJCJ

oh the less said about the christian perspective on job the better <3

BUT LISTEN

LIIIIISTENNNNN

the book of job begins with the deity and the satan making a wager on the matter of job’s faith, because the deity points him out to the satan like ‘isn’t my servant job the most righteous man alive’ and the satan goes ‘of course he is, you’ve given him a charmed life, take back your blessings and see how long it takes him to curse your name’ and the deity is like ‘bet.’

so the narrative conceit here is the deity gives the satan free rein to torment job so as to reveal whether his faith is true or not: all of his wealth (livestock) is brutally wiped out or stolen by raiders who put most of his household to the sword, all ten of his children are killed, and finally he’s struck with a debilitatingly painful affliction. then his wife tells him to curse god and die and several of his friends come to sit with him in his ABJECT MISERY and that’s the end of the prologue.

the narrative proper is largely a series of discourses between job and his friends on the subject of whether or not he Deserved This.

his friends (eliphaz, bildad, zophar, and elihu) hold a belief in the absolute justness and rightness of the deity which demands that job’s suffering is either punishment for some grievous wrongdoing or else discipline meant to teach him something important.

job’s position can be summed up as “fuck you, there is nothing i could possibly have done to deserve this, i am being unfairly persecuted and because NONE OF YOU ASSHOLES BELIEVE ME I WILL MOUNT A LAWSUIT AGAINST GOD TO PROVE MY INNOCENCE”

and i just—

quotations are from edward greenstein’s excellent translation (read it it fucks)

JOB!

[3:20–22] Why give light to one in travail?

Or life to those bitter of spirit?—

Those waiting for death, but there is none,

Though they dig for it more than for treasure!

Those singing for joy at the mouth of the tomb,

Who are glad to be reaching the grave.

JOB!!

[7:17–18] What is a mortal that you treat him as important?

Why do you pay him any mind,

Take account of him each morning,

Test him every minute?

[19] Why can’t you just look away from me,

Let go for just a swallow of spit?

[20] If I’ve sinned, what can I do to you,

O Watcher of Humankind?

Why have you made me your target?

How could I be a burden to you?

[21] Why can’t you pardon my transgression,

Commute my punishment?

For I’ll soon be lying in the dirt—

And when you seek me, I’ll be gone.

JOB!!!

[19:21] I am innocent—I care not for my self;

I’m fed up with my life.

[22] It is all the same.

And so I declare:

The innocent and the guilty he brings to (the same) end.

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP

[10:1] My entire being despises my life.

I would prepare a complaint on my behalf,

I would speak in the bitterness of my being;

[2] I would say to Eloah: “Do not condemn me!

Let me know of what you accuse me!

[3] Does it do you any good to do wrong?

To reject the effort of your hands?

While you shine favor on the schemes of the wicked?

[4–5] Have you eyes that are of flesh?

Do you see as a mortal sees?

Are your days like the days of a mortal?

Are your years like those of a man?

[6–7] When you go looking for my crime,

And investigate my sin,

You know very well I am not guilty—

But no one can rescue from your hand!

[8–9] Your hands formed me and made me,

Put me together—then destroyed me!

Mind now, it is you who made me like clay,

And will return me to the dust!

I WILL TAKE MY FLESH IN MY TEETH

[13:13] Keep silent before me, so that I may speak—

Whatever may come upon me!

[14–15] I will take my flesh in my teeth,

And I will place my life-breath in my hand.

Though he slay me, I will no longer wait—

I will accuse him of his ways to his face!

SO YOU OBLITERATE A MORTAL’S HOPE

[14:18–19] And yet, a cliff will fall and crumble;

A mountain will be moved from its place;

Rocks are worn down by water;

A torrent sweeps away the earth’s dust;

So do you obliterate a mortal’s hope.

[20] You assault him continually—and he passes on;

You disfigure him—and then you dispatch him.

AUGH!!!

[16:6] If I speak out, my pain will not be spared.

But if I desist, how will it leave me?

[7] By now he has worn me down;

You have devastated my entire company.

[8] You have shriveled me, and this has become a stigma;

My gauntness stands up and testifies against me.

[9] As his anger rages, he strikes a hostile pose;

He gnashes his teeth at me;

My enemy sharpens his eyes at me.

[10] People’s mouths gape at me,

They strike my cheeks to shame me;

They all form gangs against me.

I JUST—

[19:21] Have compassion, compassion, you my friends!

For the hand of Eloah has afflicted me.

[22] Why do you like El persecute me?

Why can’t you get your fill of my flesh?

HE SWEARS OVER AND OVER HE ISNT LYING

[27:3–4] So long as there is life-breath within me,

And in my nostrils Eloah’s spirit,

I swear that my lips will speak nothing corrupt,

And my tongue will utter no deceit.

JOB!!!!

[30:26–28] For I hoped for good, but there came bad;

I expected light, but there came darkness,

My insides roil and can’t be still;

I’ve been greeted by days of affliction.

I walk in gloom without a sun;

In the assembly I stand and cry out.

SORRY I LITERALLY CANNOT READ JOB WITHOUT BECOMING DERANGED. (BUT DO YOU SEE. WHERE I AM GETTING THE SALEM CONNECTION)

anyway in chapter 30 job makes an oath of his innocence and (after a very! lengthy! interjection from elihu) the deity turns up in chapter 38 to answer job’s lawsuit by going, in essence, WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? I’M GOD! whereupon job is literally like

[40:3] Up spoke Job to YHWH and he said:

[4–5] Lacking respect, how can I answer you?

My hand I place over my mouth.

I have spoken once and I will not repeat;

Twice—and I will (speak) no more.

“ANSWER MY FUCKING QUESTION IM NOT GOING TO REPEAT MYSELF”

who else is doing it like job

then the deity goes LOOK AT THESE AWESOME CREATURES I MADE. CAN YOU TAME THE LEVIATHAN, JOB? HUH? EVEN GODS TREMBLE BEFORE HIM

and then—well the standard translation reads job’s final statement as repentance but this is notoriously a difficult passage, and as a matter of narrative and the context of the chapter as a whole i think greenstein’s reading makes considerably more sense—anyway job goes:

[42:1] Up spoke Job to YHWH and he said:

[2] I have known you are able to do all;

That you cannot be blocked from any scheme.

[3] “Who is this hiding counsel without knowledge?”

Truly I’ve spoken without comprehending—

Wonders beyond me that I do not know.

[4] “Hear now and I will speak!

I will ask you, and you help me know!”

[5] As a hearing by the ear I have heard you,

And now my eye has seen you.

[6] That is why I am fed up;

I take pity on “dust and ashes!”

(in 42:2 job is echoing the language the deity uses in genesis 11:6 in reference to the builders of the tower of babel; ‘dust and ashes’ is an epithet for wretched humanity and also occurs in chapter 30.)

I TAKE PITY ON DUST AND ASHES.

WHO IS DOING IT LIKE JOB

imagine being so DONE that you have the wherewithal to be scathingly sarcastic TO GOD’S FACE

and then the deity praises his honesty, scolds his friends for bleating platitudes instead of speaking the truth, and restores everything that was taken from job and more THE END.

/lies down

read job. theodicy of all time

one day i am going to calm down about job enough to finish my actual. coherent salem-as-job screed instead of just firehosing out half the passages that make me DERANGED but DO YOU SEE. DO YOU SEEEEEEEEEEE

horrific torment at the hands of divine beings for the pettiest of reasons. unspeakable anguish. isolation and exile! desolation! absolute certainty that his suffering is cruel and unjust! utter scorn for deceit and falsehood! he cannot rest because the deity will not let him die no matter how he begs for death! his wife his friends his community all turn against him, repulsed by his agony! he sues god!! he tells god i hear you, i see you, i feel fucking sorry for all of us who mean nothing to you!!!

[missroserose]

13 books meme

@introvertia tagged me in this (thank you, lovely, you're such a positive influence on my reading consistency <3) So let's talk books!

1) The Last book I read:

The Sparrow by Mary Doria Russell. Absolutely destroyed me—90's science fiction, examining the paradoxes of faith and the difficulties of cross-culture exploration, seasoned with a hefty dose of grief and frustrated desire. Might as well have been written for me.

2) A book I recommend:

The Wicked & The Divine, by Kieron Gillen and Jamie McKelvie. A sprawling examination of the celebrity-industrial complex, cultural and individual objectification, and the dark side of fandom culture. Well worth reading through in its entirety.

3) A book that I couldn’t put down:

Starling House, by Alix E. Harrow. I'm a sucker for a fierce and driven heroine who makes things happen by sheer force of will, despite the odds being against her. Between that and the deliciously spooky atmosphere, I adored this book.

4) A book I’ve read twice (or more):

<i>Good Omens</i>, by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. Hardly an original answer on this website, but it's a classic for a reason <3

5) A book on my TBR:

Victor Lavalle's The Changeling, thanks to @introvertia's recommendation. I know nothing about it but I'm looking forward to reading it!

6) A book I’ve put down:

The War of Art, by Steven Pressfield. I know that the accepted formula for self-help books is to present your one theory and explain why it solves every problem in the known universe, and I hate it, which is probably why I don't read a lot of self-help books. Needless to say, around the time this dude claimed that Hitler wouldn't have become a mass murderer if he'd followed the book's advice, I gave up in disgust.

7) A book on my wish list:

Honestly, I don't have many? I've been enjoying reading from the library, in part because my bedroom is already showing the strain of previous book-buying sprees.

8) A favorite book from childhood:

The Woman Who Rides Like a Man, by Tamora Pierce. I read the entire Alanna series numerous times but I think this was my favorite—I really loved seeing her come into her own independence and learn a new culture (and one that accepted her unusual gender presentation).

9) A book you would give to a friend:

Again, depends strongly on the friend...but I can think of more than a few who'd enjoy the old-school gothic fairytale setting and viciously driven heroine of A. G. Slatter's All the Murmuring Bones.

10) A book of Poetry or Lyrics you own:

Hm...does the script to Hedwig and the Angry Inch count?

11) A nonfiction book you own:

The Devil in the White City, by Erik Larson—they practically issue you a copy when you move to Chicago. (In fairness, it's a cracking read.)

12) What are you currently reading:

Skin Folk, a collection of short stories by Nalo Hopkinson. I'm also rereading (or re-listening to) Mike Carey's The Devil You Know, and enjoying it rather better this time around—I think the first time I tried it, almost ten years ago, I was expecting something more along the lines of The Dresden Files and wasn't quite old enough to appreciate the more emotionally battered and worn-down middle-aged protagonist. Now, being a decade older and having lived through a global pandemic and seen rather more of just how terrible people can be to each other...I think it's more my speed. And possibly good research for if I ever get my angel noir story off the ground.

13) What are you planning on reading next?

Definitely The Changeling.

Bonus Round Shelfie?

I'm at a library right now but I might add one later!

Tagging: @klove0511, @sirsparklepants, @emiliosandozsequence, @skybound2, @ihni, @callieb, @lord-angelfish, @redmyeyes, @misschinablue, and @sea-salted-wolverine—no pressure, obviously, but I'd be interested in your answers!

[dragoncookies]

Fitz Stellar lune Analyzation Prelude

So, this one may be a tad bit long.

So, I am going to make a series dissecting Fitz in Stellarlune. This is the lens through which I look at Fitz, for context. 

Stellarlune was definitely...something, for Fitz. It sort of made me realize certain things about Fitz that I hadn’t before and was both on brand for his character and completely threw away his character at the same time. 

Overall, In this book Fitz was completely demoted to the role of love interest and all of his other wonderful character traits were just thrown away. His telepath skills were there but what else is new? 

There was no insight as to how he’s truly dealing with the hatred of everyone at Foxfire, nothing on his relationship with his parents after the craziness of Flashback (haven’t even seen Alden since flashback. Not complaining but), nothing more on how he truly feels about Alvar being partially dead because of HIM (other than that he’s mad about it), or if he still feels that suffocating Vacker Legacy. 

Stellarlune gave many inklings as to how he’s taking things and developed his character for sure, but they felt almost empty and almost antagonized him if anything. 

This is all because of the series being written from Sophie’s POV. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with how Sophie feels about Fitz. Relationships (of all kinds) are complicated, and one of my favorite things about this series is how painfully realistic it is when it comes to the relationships. The messiness of it all is so realistic for how it actually is for teenagers. 

It just...really doesn’t do Fitz any favors when someone who’s a huge DOORMAT (I love Sophie don’t worry) is the one describing someone who can be such a blunt little PRICK (Fitz is my favorite character). No wonder he’s painted in the light that he is in this book. If he wasn’t, it wouldn’t be in character at all for Sophie.

Unfortunately, you have to be able to read inbetween the lines and do some extra thinking to get the actual meaning of what Fitz said and did in this book.

He’s like a riddle that you have to chew on before you get the meaning. Or a taylor swift song. At first you think “this is so untasteful”, but then it gets stuck in your head and listen to it again and again and notice all the touches and effort that went into it. Then you appreciate it, and enjoy it. 

Fitz is so hated because he’s just. He’s an absolute character of a character. it’s hard to remember everything in such an intricate series, but it’s very important to remember everything that has happened to Fitz and what his POV is from the beginning of the series to Stellarlune in order to understand his character. His ENTIRE world is pulled from under him, he’s never given the space to express his emotions, he’s lived believing that his worth is tied to him being useful and achieving things. There are SO. MANY. parts to dissect about him it’s stupid. He’s a mess of conflictions. Family, or friends? Vacker Legacy, or improve Lost Cities? Romance with Sophie, or friendship with Keefe? He shifts back and forth all the time throughout the series. 

Here’s my take on his personality. He’s blunt as heck. Very little thought goes into what he says. He actually becomes increasingly blunt throughout the series. For that reason, I think it’s important to remember that not everything about what Fitz says should be taken so seriously. If very little thought goes into what he says, very little gravity resides in his words. Thinking of all the blunt people I’ve known, their actions and tone and simply getting to know them reveals how priceless they can be. They can be hard to swallow, but loyal to the core and so, so caring. Remember:

Fitz loves to bake.

Fitz loves giving gifts. He even has a mini gift giving arc. He went from giving Sophie a stupid boring pen to getting her new, unique gifts every day when she was having a depressive episode in Nightfall. That painting was a huge fumble though. 

He legit has ten pairs of the same fuzzy pjs. Like what.

He’s really a huge dork. Like, the hugest dork. He literally sat with his sister at lunch for a while before Keefe. 

Rambling king. He rambles all the time. He’s so awkward about it to. 

Sophie has described his hair as looking like a “rockstar”. His hair looks like a rockstar. He just. He. 

He loves sweets. Remember those dry cookies in Legacy? Remember how he kept eating them? Remember the ripple puff he devoured in one bite in book five? He’s got a sweet tooth 

He liked having green spikey hair. Fitz was calmly eating his breakfast with green hair and only changed it because his mother made him.

He likes holding people’s hands. 

Sophie found Fitz reading a TEXTBOOK for FUN in book one. He likes to read. he probably already knew how to bottle wind but he was still readin’ that “ways to catch the wind” book anyways. Just curled up on the chair readin’ it. 

Fitz gave Keefe a pep talk in Unlocked, telling him that accepting help isn’t weak. It was so inspirational and touching. 

He actually sleeps with a stuffed animal. For that matter, Alvar confirmed that he’s a little cuddler in Neverseen. He’s a little snuggler cuddly guy. 

he went with Sophie to get gelato for his friends. In the middle of a crisis. He just dropped everything to get ice cream for his friends. 

He literally has a box of souvenirs he got from the forbidden cities. He got little mementos every time he went looking for sophie. 

He also tried to save a pigeon. Just, he just saw it and had to help it. He got chased by other little kids and probably hit by flying sandals for it. 

I believe it mentions at some point that he had to get tutors because of how much school he missed looking for Sophie. He had to put in that work to become top of his class. Do you know how mentally destroying it is to be top of your class? He’s just very competitive. 

Fitz has a limp now.

He dive rolled to push Sophie out of harm’s way.

He carried Linh when she was tired in Nightfall.

he likes dinosaurs and dragons.

Biana is canonly graceful, so when Fitz said that he catches Biana all the time because she’s clumsy in book one, Fitz was just making stuff up for Sophie’s benefit. Silly. 

Personality wise, Fitz is a very feel-y feeler. He’s a huge nerd and very smart, yes, but he’s very driven by emotions. He’s very dense as well. And prideful. He’s proud of his achievements. Those are just his traits. All put together, can he be unlikeable? Oh absolutely. But, if you just accept his very REALISTIC and well rounded character, he’s a gem. 

With this mindset (in the next post), let’s dissect Fitz in that Rayni face reveal scene!

[kenna-is-reading]

Crescent City: House of Sky and Breath Review

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Dear Readers,

I have so many thoughts, questions, comments, and concerns in regards to this book that it made me stop procrastinating and just start my blog, already. I finished CC2 in the wee hours of last night, having flown through the last 400 pages in a single day. What I had heard going into this book was that it was a "whole lot of nothing" and "kind of hard to get through," but that really wasn't the case for me. I have owned the first CC book since it came out, but just now finished it last month. I found the first half of that difficult to read through, not because it was bad or boring or had anything wrong with it, but simply because I have the IQ of a paper towel and could not bring myself to comprehend anything that was going on. However, when I hit the last 200 or so pages of HOEAB, something clicked. Something shifted in the earth's atmosphere and I was addicted. I snatched book 2 from the library first thing the very next morning, and the rest was history. I found that I absolutely love everything about this series, from the setting to the characters to the way everything worked together. I just found all the different types of people and how they related to one another and how they operated in a modern city setting to be so interesting. In listening to other people's reviews of this book, some didn't like the large cast of characters and found it hard to keep them all straight, but as a Throne of Glass enthusiast, I felt right at home. I loved the changing perspectives and getting to see what was going on inside the heads of characters like Ruhn, Tharion, and Ithan. The character dynamics worked really well, in my opinion, and I always love the way a big group of characters interacts and banters, especially in an SJM novel. A couple of things I wanted to note specifically about HOSAB:

The Rebel Plotline

I actually didn't mind the plotline with Ophion and the Renasts. It felt like a good additional conflict to pull on the loose threads that were left open at the end of Book 1 and ended up tying into the overarching plot in an interesting way. I was disappointed that Sofie actually didn't make it, because we spend a very large portion of this book discussing her powers and attempting to find Emile, and I wanted to see how her relationship with Cormac played out, because he was a very interesting character to me as well. I was definitely sad about his sacrifice, but it was made more impactful given his final interaction with Ruhn. While he had not been around long, he was a complex character, and I found myself wanting better for him and wanting for him to be able to become the person he wanted to be. However, I still want to know more about Sofie's thunderbird powers and how they play into everything.

2. Tharion

I have loved Tharion since he first appeared in Book 1, but I was so disappointed in him in this book. Some of his choices had me yelling at the page, but his complexity makes him such a good character. We know he is overall a good person, but he can be treacherous as he struggles to juggle his loyalty to his friends with his obligation to the River Queen. The biggest question that I had finishing this book was due to the fact that when Captain Sendes saves the crew from...well...everyone, there is a line insinuating that she expects that they not reveal the truth about their camouflaging ship technology. She basically tells them, you screw us, we'll screw you. Tharion immediately returns to the River Queen and sells them out, telling her all about the ship tech and even mentioning Captain Sendes by name. Knowing the River Queen, I expected her to retaliate against the Ocean Queen's crew, or at least for Sendes & co. to discover Tharion's betrayal and refuse to help them, but this issue is never brought up again, so I was confused about that, not to mention frustrated with Tharion for blabbing everyone's business to the River Queen of his own free will. The second, probably most obvious choice of Tharion's that I was frustrated by in this book was his decision to pledge himself to the Viper Queen. I understand why he did it, and I realize that he was, in a way, punishing himself, but I can't help but feel like he could have had other options that didn't involve selling himself into literal slavery. Regardless, I love him as a character and I cannot wait to see his arc. I hope he is able to create a better life for himself and have the development that Cormac was not able to.

3. Hunt

This seems like it might be controversial because I see a lot of Hunt slander that I believe is unwarranted, but Hunt Athalar is firmly within my list of top 5 SJM men. I love him. Plain and simple, I love him so much. Having to read the ending of this book when everything he has worked for goes down the drain as his halo is reapplied was absolutely grueling. I know there is also a lot of speculation that Bryce will have another love interest simply because this is an SJM book, and I'm just not sure why or how that would happen. I think that, at this point, that is what everyone is expecting to happen, so I'd be very surprised if Sarah went that route. But whatever the case, I love Hunt and I really hope nothing happens to him. He's been through the ringer for literal centuries and I just want him to be happy!!! I also have questions following this book about his lineage. I feel like there is a lot yet to be revealed about his parentage and his powers, so I am excited to read more in CC3 and see what comes of that...if he ever gets out of that stupid dungeon. (Which, btw, sidebar: all my homies HATE Pollux and I cannot wait until he gets the Cairn treatment, preferably from Lidia).

4. Connor

This book raised SO MANY QUESTIONS about Connor. It gave me hope that maybe we will see Connor again in some way because the book spent so much time on Ithan's quest to find out where he is. And even if we don't get to see Connor or talk to him again, I WANNA KNOW WHERE HE IS! The Holstrom Bros are #1 in my heart and I want nothing but love and light for them <3.

5. The Big Twist aka Infinity War (Sarah's Version)

Now team. I think a lot of us readers knew how this book was going to end, or at least knew The Big Thing that was going to happen at some point within it. And that makes me SO UPSET! The appearance of Rhysand and that whole situation had the potential to be one of the most breathtaking plot twist mindblowing earth-shattering life-changing moments in literary history. However, the way it was handled by both the reader community AND literally Bloomsbury themselves made it so that basically everybody and their cousin's neighbor's dog's goldfish's nephew knew that the crossover was happening. It didn't matter how dedicated you were to avoiding spoilers, somehow they ALWAYS found their way onto the screen! No amount of typing "NO SPOILERS SPOILER FREE NO SPOILERS" in on BookTok stopped the spoilers from coming! Me personally, I refused to look at anything SJM related for the entire release year to avoid spoilers, because I hadn't read any Crescent City yet, I had only read up to ACOSF. So I thought I was safe. I was wrong. It was an unseasonably bright and happy day on January 10th as I pulled out my phone at the library and clicked on the Instagram app to see what exciting new things had been posted, and imagine my surprise when the FIRST THING ON MY SCREEN was a single graphic, (not a carousel), posted by SJM and Bloomsbury that read, in big bright letters, "Bryce began running again, hurtling through the cave. Back toward Nesta and Azriel. And prayed there was SOMETHING LEFT FOR HER TO SAVE." I reacted in a manner akin to that stan Twitter reaction video of iCarly opening her apartment door and immediately being blinded. I nearly threw the offending phone across the public library. I prayed to unsee. But the damage was done. I had seen. I then went to my local Walmart 20 days later to acquire House of Flame and Shadow, and I was deeply alarmed when each copy of the brand new book was stamped with a big blue sticker that read something along the lines of "INCLUDES BONUS CHAPTER WITH BRYCE, NESTA, AND AZRIEL!" Right on the front of the cover for all to see. Now you may say, "Kenna dearest, CC1 had been out for nearly 4 years at that point. CC2 had been out for nearly 2 years. They shouldn't have to post spoiler warnings anymore." And to that I say, if it were any other author or series. YES! So true! However, House of Earth and Blood is indeed 799 pages in length. House of Sky and Breath is indeed 801 pages in length. I am but a full time student, part-time worker, volunteer, sister, daughter, and friend. My reading time had been quite limited at that point. Not to mention that Sarah J. Maas is arguably the most popular author within BookTube, BookTok, BookTwt, and Bookstagram COMBINED right now, and so many people are just now starting to read her books. However, I suppose if readers DO know that the ACOTAR characters show up in Crescent City, it will motivate fans of ACOTAR to continue on with Maas's books and purchase more of them, so really it's 10/10 marketing and I must applaud the reckless major-multi-series-spoiling amid my frustration.

Overall, I absolutely love the Crescent City series, and I loved HOSAB as a sequel, and I am diving immediately into book 3. This series continues to cement SJM as a master of her craft and portrays the way that she is just an expert at putting a story together and creating characters that feel real. I am now off to devour House of Flame and Shadow, and then probably reread ACOTAR and TOG to try to pick up on some of that big-brain tricky foreshadowing she always does. Until next time, and thank you for reading my emphatic literary ramblings.

XO,

Kenna

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urgh i’m sure you’re sick of hearing about it but i have no friends who watch obx and idk where else to channel my feelings 😭 I AM SO UPSET. I genuinely can’t believe they’ve done this, i was lulled into a false sense of security by the announcement for season 5 because i thought surely Rudy would hang on for one final season. I was so convinced rafe would die after his goodbye to sophia that i was distracted from the real danger (sidebar i hated that they build up that relationship just to end it in one sentence over a phone call, i really had hope after rafe telling her it was okay).

I wish they’d brought it to a close this season so badly and just given them a happy ending. The worst part is i was genuinely enjoying part 2 for the most part even with the crazy plot lines. I was hopeful we’d get some real resolution following JJs crash out with him facing up to his issues and talking it out, particularly with Kiara.

The lack of Jiara was genuinely so jarring and obvious i assumed it was intentional and would come to some sort of head wherein JJ would acknowledge how distant he had been and there would be some kind of emotional breakthrough/makeup for the couple but NO. like they really gave us nothing like the handshake when they parted ways had me screaming WHAT WAS THAT.

the death was so so badly done like obviously we would never be happy with JJs death but there were so many better ways around it, having him actively die protecting the pogues not just randomly being stabbed while standing around, having him actually get to say goodbye to them?! POPE NEVER GETTING TO SAY I LOVE YOU BACK?? and like why was he buried in the sand in fucking morocco that literally broke my heart like alone and to be forgotten and never visited in the fucking desert?? Im so angry i’ve been so excited for this season for the longest time and had so much hope based off part 1, i really felt like they’d been listening to the fans and giving us what we wanted in terms of season 1 vibes and i was so hyped to rewatch it all once i finished yesterday, but now the entire thing feels so tainted??

he suffered so much for absolutely nothing and no reason whatsoever. i feel i can’t even rewatch the parts of pt2 that i enjoyed again because they’re so tainted by the jarring energy between rudy and maddison now that i know it’s not part of the plot. it’s so glaringly obvious that none of this was planned, even if there’s some truth in them initially wanting JJ killed off there’s no way they would’ve followed through with it after seeing how much of a fan favourite he became. like they really gave bro an entire arc of suffering with no resolution other than him saving sarah then just killed him??

i feel so upset today idek what to do with myself, i can no longer enjoy any of my jj content without feeling so heartbroken. at least if they’d just had him leave or given him some form of resolution before his death the whole series wouldn’t feel so tainted… sorry for this insanely long ramble i just needed to offload this somewhere. thank god for people like you working harder than these god damn writers to produce actual good plots 😭💗

Never be sorry! We're all upset! I haven't seen any post or response defending the season, like I do really think everyone hated the ending and hated the way it went down. I've seen a lot about just wishing it had gone down different, not that he didn't die, but that it was for an actual reason. Which is a complaint I have about a lot of actual books. I'm not upset someone died, I'm just upset that it always feels pointless and makes the story feel like it should never have happened.

I was also lulled into the false sense of security with season five. I thought for sure it was because Rudy wanted to leave and they decided to give it a proper ending and not doing anything drastic with his character. Oh how I was wrong. My hope is that Rafe and Sofia are able to work through things in season five, and that they can get to a better place, because I do think they really love each other, and I do think they still do. But I guess we'll see if they force Kiara and Rafe together or not...

You can very much tell that there is a lot of tension between JJ and Kiara because there's a lot of tension between the actors. It was not hidden well at all, they barely interact with one another and if you haven't watched Season three or the first part of season four, you would never know they were supposed to be in love. If anything, it looked like they hated each other.

JJ's entire death scene and the scenes following were just piss poor. Everything about it was bad, and I think it's because everyone knew that this was going to be bad. Everyone knew this would end the show. They're literally watching and filming the end of this series and these stories and they couldn't do anything to make it better. I think it feels and looks so bad, because they felt the same way we do about it.

I'm upset too, it's been a trash week and it feels like the one thing we were looking forward to made it so much worse. It's ok to be upset, and it's ok to not want to see or read anything to do with the Pogues right now. Totally understandable. I felt the same way right after, like do I want to take a break from Audrey and JJ for a while? But I decided that JJ's still alive as long as we write him, as long as we love him, and I think we all deserve that.