#i knew someone would ask me this lollll

[parkitaco]

hi do you have plans on writing a sequel to the way life goes?

hi anon!! i don’t currently have any plans for a sequel, and tbh i really like that fic as a stand-alone since i based it off a song and anything i wrote beyond the og fic wouldn’t be true to the song anymore, so a sequel would probably be Unofficial if it ever did exist :^)

[niefics]

CRAWLING BACK 2 U — P.JS X FEM!READER

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ — SYNOPSIS : Reader & jay loose contact after a messy argument about a girl, jay comes crawling back wanting to make her feel good one last time.

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ — WARNINGS : toxic (?), Fem!reader, cussing, smut with a small plot, pussy eating, dumbification ? NOT PROOF READ!!! Oh and no protection (please wear it), breading kink, slut shaming (?), pet names, slight choking, fingering, cum eating??,, wc ; 2.5k, felt extra nasty ;)))

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ — A/N : long time no see LOLLLL, I just ain’t been having inspo lmao .. also why does nb fw jay fics fr </33, reblogs are much preciated. I hope you like this fic!

Sighing harshly you broke the silence that was in jays apartment. "So who is she ?" You asked crossing your arms looking at him. He looked at you, his eyebrows scrunching. "The fuck does it matter, we aren't dating." Your head snapped back at the sudden words. You knew he wasn't yours, you two never put a label on it but it was blatantly obvious what this relationship was. Friends with benefits that was obviously becoming more.

"It fucking matters because you are fucking me, and you always somehow forget to bring condoms so jay it does fucking matter!" You spoke, you've never snapped at jay but at this moment it was serious. Jay sighed, pinching nose bridge as he said your name. "Look, we are only fuck, okay? Only time you're over is to fuck got it ? We were never more." Jay spoke, his tone cold. The fact that he said you two were never more was irritating, assuming the nights you spent with each other just cuddling and acting lovey dovey was nothing more to him was funny, knowing he was the one who started it all. "So those night we laid up under eachother doing nothing but cuddling was nothing more right? Jay I know we aren't a thing I'm not dumb, but it feels like your fucking playing in my face and I don't like that. Do you want her cause she can have you. You were nothing more then dick to me anyways. You could barely hit the spots that made come anyways." You spoke coldly, grabbing your bag and walking to his front door slipping your shoes on and walking out.

One thing you didn't like was being played, especially by someone you know you can do better with. Months went by with no more interaction you didn't care more worried about yourself. There were night where you did miss jay but at that moment you could care less.

As the rain started to get heavy outside your apartment late at night, you were settled into your bed comfortably, half asleep as your tv blasted in the background for extra noise as you slept cuddled up to your pillow. And just as you were about to hit the deepest part of your sleep cycle you heard a continuous knock from your front door sighing, you got up slip on your house shoes and walking to go look through the peephole. You were surprised  to see the familiar figure of jay, someone you've cut off long ago. You tiredly unlocked the door to see him drenched. "Listen.." you tiredly rolled your eyes. "What are you here for ?" You questioned tiredly. "You.." he spoke, you laughed softly at his nonsense. "You had me once why would I let you have me again?"

He sighed, saying your name softly. "Cmon, it was a stupid argument." You rolled your eyes, shaking your head. "You wouldn't answer the question of the bitch you could've been talking to, jay im not gonna let sleep with just anyone whenever you're sleeping with me! You hardly use condoms so why the fuck would I?" You spoke scrunching you eyebrows. "I dropped contact with her, I don't have her number, she's a nobody to me now .. just please let me, make up to you." He spoke stepping closer to you.

And he you were, on your bed, half necked, your shorts you were sleeping was tossed around your room somewhere while your panties were hanging on to your leg as jay sat head deep into your legs, you legs over his shoulders as his hands kept you legs from closing on his as he sucked your clit, humming as he sucked it, the vibrations causing you to moan as your toes would curl. As little gasps and whines came out your mouth, you forgot how good he felt and why you liked jay so much. No matter how bad he would treat you would stay and when you finally left him alone you really couldn't figure out why and now you do remember, it was how good he'd pleasure you, how good he'd make you come and wouldn't stop till he was done. And when he finished he would cuddle you, cradle you, caress the skin he bruised. That's why you liked him so much, no one has ever made you feel this good.

You whined saying his name with your eyes closed, you grabbed onto your nipples giving yourself extra pleasure as he kept going. He stopped sucking your swollen puffy clit to go lower sticking his tongue out to lick your wet slit, causing to gasp making your legs open wider wanting all of him, you missed how good is tongue felt on you pussy, you missed how filling his fingers alone felt. You couldn't make yourself feel as good as Jay could. No orgasm felt as good as the one Jay gave you and you hated that, now matter if you thought about sleeping with another man, it wouldn't feel ass good as it did with jay. The after care wouldn't feel as good as with jay, it was as of tho jay ruined it all for you abs you hated it.

But here you are, a moaning, whining mess as jay licked up your slick prepping to fuck you senseless, he pulled his face away from you cunt rubbing his middle finger into your slick spitting into it giving more slick to work with as he rubbing his finger into your pussy before shoving his finger causing you to gasp at the feeling of his cold digit being inside you, he wasted no time moving it inside and out of you watching you to see how you were feeling, a shit eating grin never failed to meet your gaze as he moved his finger faster with no warning you eyebrows knitted together you tried to keep eye contact your mouth agape before you head fell back and you finally spoke. "Fuck!" You dragged your word out as you found your hand rubbing your clit trying to clinch on his finger. He chuckled.

"Trying to come already baby? Haven't even put the second one in yet. You've missed my fingers this much ?" He spoke shaking his head taking his eyes off your face to you cunt who was damn sure ready for a second finger, he added it as you quickly shut your legs.. well tried to at least. "F .. uh .. ck!" You spoke trying to let it out in a small cry coming out instead. He chucked diving back into your cunt, going back to kissing and sucking on you clit as he fucked his fingers into you, pumping them hitting that spot that made you feel funny. "Yes, jay please don't stop." You whined putting your hand in his hair pulling it, he groaned causing vibrations making you clinch on his fingers as he kept pressing on your good spot. You already felt like the knot in your stomach was about to pop.

"Shit shit shit, jay! Please .. can I come." He pulled off you letting his finger slip out rubbing you clit as he stood up. He shook his head no, humming in a disapproval. "Not right now." He spoke kissing your lips, your slick on his lips and chin, he hummed into the kiss his pants strangling his hardened dick, it twitching in his sweats. He pulled back as he untied it. "Fuck I don't have a condom." You rolled your eyes. "You never have one." He chuckled pulling his pants down, including his underwear his dick springing out with precum leaking. "I'm starting to think you like the risk of cumming in me." He pulled in to kiss you his hand finding it way on your neck. "And you like it, you clench harder Everytime I think about trying to baby trap you." You both knew it was just the feeling of good sex playing a roll in his "threats." You knew jay had a breading kink, but he never dared to fill you up, even with as much begging as you did it was always no.

"You gonna fill me up tonight, make our last time a good one ? Leave me all messy?" He grabbed you by your neck kissing you harder you knew exactly what to do to turn him on, no matter how long it's been. "Turn around, ass up." He pulled back to watch you do so, you tried to take your oversized shirt on. "No, keep it on, I want to have something to pull on." You pouted. "But you have my hair?" He chuckled shaking his head. "Who said I can't have options?" He spoke watching you turn over ass up he walked closer to the bed pulling you to the edge, he put his fingers back into you as you grabbed his dick at stroking it as he pumped his fingers into you making you moan again. You your hand back towards your face into your mouth, spitting into your hand and pulling it back to his hardened member stroking it making him moan at the feeling of the mixture of spit and precum together. "Enough, move you hand." He spoke as you let go and he positioned himself slowing pushing himself in.

A gasp came out your mouth, you nearly forgot how painfully big his dick was, especially when he decided not go missionary, whining at the pain. "Ahh take it, I know you can ?" He spoke as you ran a little from it pushing your ass back down a little as he went down more and more finally hitting the base he gave you time to breath and get used to it. He was a monster after all.

He pulled back, as he started thrusting into you, your eyebrows knitted together as you let him fuck himself into you you lip bitten as you took it, getting used to his dick again you started to moan more freely, he grabbed your shirt, pulling on it as he started pounding into you as you moaned and whined his name like he liked it. "Wait- fuck! Y/n is this my shirt?" He spoke pounding into you, it was so dumb of  him to even try to keep a conversation with you especially in this position, you can never keep up a conversation in the position, he just felt so much deeper when your ass was up like this, you came the most in the position, made you biggest messes in the position. You hummed. "You know I .. fucking hate you not using your words!" He spoke pounding harder. You tried to speak. "Yes! I kept it- fuck! Fells s'good." You moaned. "Your dumb for my dick aren't you? Haven't even been long and here you are all whiny and creamy already on my dick." He groaned.

"And I bet you'd love to feel me feel you up to the brim too." He spoke going faster, your mouth fell agape as you felt so good. "Fuck yes!" You moaned. "So dumb for my cock huh baby? My little cock slut, not even your own fingers can make you feel this good huh?" You clenched on his dick you felt so close yet so far. "Let me here you say it?" He spoke slapping your ass. "Ah! Fuck.. you can only make feel this good jay!" He chuckled pulling on you hair and bring you closer. "Mhm, that's right my dumb slut, nobody can make you feel as good as jay can." His hand snaked around your neck softly squeezing your neck you felt yourself go dumb, you knew you were about to come whining.

"Please please please." You repeated in a whisper. "Please what?" He asked groaning in your ear. "Please let me come." Jay twitched hearing that, kissing your jaw as he felt you clench again. "I'm so, so close please!" He liked when you begged, he liked to see you a mess in general he couldn't help that. "Come baby, make a mess on my dick." He spoke letting you fall back on your knees slapping your ass as he kept going as just like that you whined cleaning on jay so hard he could've popped out. "Fuck." Jay spoke as your orgasm hit you, you started shivering as he kept going, jay kept thrusting, a ring forming around his dick he began to get sloppy, he went down toward you ear once you slightly calmed down from your orgasm. "Gonna let me fill you up? One good time." You nodded frantically, shaking still "god yes!" He chuckled as he kept going as you started moving your hips too.

"Flip over I need to see your face." And you did so, he took your legs and put one over his shoulder as the other was in his hand as he kept going. You rested your body on your elbows as you let him fuck you. You watched him go in and out of you as you met his eyes, your head falling back as you felt like you could come again just by his gaze you never wanted this to end. His thrust for so sloppy it’s was obvious he was about to come, slammed into you a few times as you came again, he did so groaning so loud, going faster. “Fuck yesss” he hummed as a mixture of both of your comes mixed together. “If you were my girlfriend I swear to god I would do this to you every night.” You were to high to even care about the stupid shit he just said. Feeling him pull out.

He fell back to his knees, as he starting to eating you out, pulling you back towards him as you whined as you made you feel good all over again, slurping up at your juices his nose hit your sensitive clit you cried out, you hand found a way to his messy hair again your thighs were definitely full at this point, you knew you were gonna have another orgasm, as he fucked his tongue into you, you cried. You were sure you loved him.

You vision became blurry as you trembled as your last and final orgasm hit. “God!” You moaned, legs shaky and your grasp on his head tighter then ever. He slurped it up one last time getting after and kissing you, you tired body wrapped your arms around him pulling him in as you made out. The taste of both of you in his and your mouth.

He cleaned you two up, as you sat in a cleaned bed, you leg wrapped over his legs as your arm was over his chest as you sat in silence as he caressed your leg. Nights like this is what you cherished, you did want to do it. But you knew it was needed.. this was the last time you saw him for sure. Or at least that’s what you wanted you woke up to him coming back with a plan B and breakfast giving you a soft kiss. And once again you crawled back to him.

[herotome]

Hi! I hope you're doing well! I was wondering... how would the ROs + Daeng if you don't mind deal with MC who's having an anxiety or panic attack? I'm pretty reluctant to reveal that part of me to others bc the ppl around who don't really take that stuff seriously or just see it as a nuisance. I can usually calm down on my own, but it's hard sometimes. I hope the cast are more kind about those sorts of things...? Thanks for such an amazing VN btw!

Aw man, me too. I still remember the first time I really sat down with my mom and discussed my anxiety with her and explaining how getting on medication was helpful. I knew that if I told her when I was younger, she wouldn't have taken it seriously or just hoped it would go away on its own somehow -- it was really up to me to pursue treatment as an adult.

Invisible illnesses can be difficult for others to imagine and understand. It was a little... "easier" for my mom to understand when she saw firsthand before & after of my panic attacks vs management via medication; it sucks that that's what she needed to really be empathetic, but that's how people are sometimes.

Anyway.

Warden: I don't think he'd know what to do...! Deer in the headlights. If MC can muster up the strength to ask him to fetch something, he'll provide it in a heartbeat. Or heck, best case scenario, give him a list of what he can do next time lollll. He wouldn't understand at all, but he'd be caring and want to help.

Griffin: Has a better understanding of anxiety and is interested in discussing preventative measures; how can she ensure MC is able to minimize situations that panic attacks? He'll find all the ways. Healthcare, therapy, all of it will be researched and organized for MC if MC permits it. Griffin will happily make all the phonecalls, too.

Mia: lol she kinda panics in tandem. Er, sympathy panic? Like how someone might experience the same symptoms when their partner is pregnant. 😂😂😂 She'd be Very Worried and checking on MC for the rest of the day, even well afterwards. Particularly loving and coddly once the panic attack has passed.

Dart: He will offer a hug and a calm conversation about how MC is feeling. (It's very nice.)

Jade: As someone with anxiety also, she knows all the anxiety hacks. Want to bite into a lemon? Do breathing exercises together (like in the game)?? Or do a 5-4-3-2-1 grounding technique?? She'll find something that works for you.

Daeng: ????????? What do you want from HIM??? Hahaha.... I guess he'll awkwardly fan MC with his hand and ask if MC wants water or something.. And will remind MC that MC still has to pay rent..

Best he can do is to offer to get "the furball" Katie for MC to hold, but it's unlikely he'll think of it.

[dotchi18]

hello to my favorite obey me writer :3

i saw you reblogged the flower writing prompts so im here!!!!

when you have time (and you're able to lollll) could you please do mammon and rose?

i hope your day has been great, your week even better,a nd your month fantastic!!

*Heart explodes and scatters to the wind* Thanks Cup ;~;

You're one of my favorite writers too, Obey Me and not ;w;

R - Rose (love at first sight): “The first time my eyes grazed your form, I knew what it meant to be utterly and ardently in love.”

Yandere!Mammon x Reader

College!AU, just like the last one <3

Warnings: References of Tampering, References to Hacking, Reader referred to as 'Treasure'

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Usually when it came to doing work for college, you were perfectly fine with holing yourself in your room and keeping yourself contained from the rest of the world, save for brief periods of time between classes where you would set yourself up in the library for any work you had.

It was on an innocuous day when your computer started to glitch.

The screen would fritz, and if it got really bad the computer would crash.

You had tried to push through at the start, as you didn't have spare money laying around to just up and buy a new laptop.

But it was starting to get out of hand, and losing two hours worth of work after you had been in the zone had lead you to biting your lower lip so you didn't scream amidst all these people, hurriedly jabbing at the power button in hopes to bring it back up, tears pressing at the back of your eyes when you had seen all that had been lost.

" You okay Treasure? Ya look like yer gonna cry."

Your eyes shifted over instead of anything else despite your surprise, and you looked to see Mammon.

He went to the college with you, you thought pretty highly of him actually.

His feelings for you were impossible to miss, especially when he tried to flirt with his little nicknames, but you weren't yet dating, as he had yet to truly ask, and you were waiting on him to tell you what he wanted.

" I just... There was..." You didn't really know how to reply to that before you gestured to the laptop as it came on fine enough, " My computer just seems to be having a... a bit of a glitch."

" Oh yeah?" He leaned over and glanced at your screen, taking in your documents and your screensaver as if he could do anything about it.

Mammon was a sweet guy, but you honestly had your doubts if he knew how to work a computer over anything but the basics.

In fact, it was really surprising he was even in the library.

" Yeah... By the way, what are you doing here Mammon?"

The white-haired man gave a small frustrated sigh and looked to the book you hadn't noticed he had slid onto the table in his transition to being beside you.

It wasn't a textbook, but the dull accounting-based title was so dull that even your brain couldn't fully process the title, sliding off it like oil on water.

" Just some stupid bullshit for class, don't worry 'bout it.

Also, I know someone who could help with this."

You looked back to him in surprise that he would volunteer something like that, " Really?"

" Yeah, my little brother Levi deals with this shit all the time. I can take it to him and he can figure it out, free of charge fer ya Treasure."

Free? Getting cheap help was one thing, but free?

" Really??"

" Yeah, don't worry about it. Ya just give him some time to work on it."

You paused.

A big paper was needed to be turned in, and you had only ever seen his brother Levi in passing, so giving up your computer was a very daunting prospect...

But ultimately your computer just kicked out 2 hours of your work just for the hell of it, so it would probably be for the best.

" ... Alright. Is there anything you need?"

" We need yer password just in case anything happens, but that's about all I know." The tanned man shrugged, but his smile was easy and warm.

The way he was putting it made it seem impossible to say no to him, or distrust his intentions, so you wrote down your password, placed it into your laptop and slid it into the bag.

" Thank you."

" Heh, don't worry about it Treasure." Mammon grinned as he grabbed the handle to the bag, slinging it over his shoulder with a blinding grin, " Just let me treat ya ta dinner after ya finish the paper, alright?"

" How could I say no to that?" You jokingly smiled to him as he winked to you, turning with a spring in his step.

-.-.-

Seems like his good luck charm worked.

He reached into his shirt, pulling on the chord around his neck, bringing out the hard drive he had plugged into your laptop a few weeks ago.

He unlooped it from his neck, whistling as he spun it around.

The second oldest Morningstar had always been known for his quick fingers and double motives.

But you always trusted him, didn't you Treasure?

He knew from the second he had looked at you that this feeling inside him was what it meant to be completely and utterly in love with someone.

And you just loved to prove him right, didn't you?

Now he even had a date with you, causing him to practically walk on air all the way home.

" Got the laptop?" Levi asked as he leaned back from his desk, pulling down his lit up headphones, bags under his eyes from the all-nighter he had been pulling.

" Yep. Don't think they even logged outta their email."

Levi scoffed and pushed away from his desk, " Too easy. Well, let's hook you up."

Don't worry Treasure, he's definitely going to solve all your problems.

So what if he gets a few... additives, from it?

[tartigglez]

Hihi! Congratulations on the 100 followers! :D

Could I request 💙 with Ike Eveland?

Thank you!

"ten-twenty"

・❥・helloooooooooo nonnie i apologise for making this angsty but i will make a lighter ver if you aren't happy with it! see also: i would like to once again apologise for my tardiness :)

・❥・ike eveland x gn!reader

・❥・0.6k

・❥・heavy depression tw, dissociation, reader cries,, like a lot. physical touch, ike may be slightly ooc bc i haven't been keeping up w/ him lately. this was really, REALLY self indulgent and i apologise but it just happened.

ps. I cried twice whilst writing this lollll

ike x 💙

the emotions we’re overwhelming, almost unbearable. soft plush of the couch cushions beneath the weight of your body provided a seat as you hugged yourself, tears streaming down your face. nothing felt real in that moment. was it normal for people to feel this way, simply because of circumstance? was this an amplification of an insecurity of yours, or something more? 

you leaned against the back of the sofa, the cushion against your right ear providing white noise as you curled up against it, seeking comfort from it, somehow. 

your mind was suddenly impeded by a soft knock on your front door. you slowly uncurled yourself from your current position, trying to wipe the tears from your eyes in case you may have to answer. you felt pathetic, but knew you’d feel even worse if you had to open the door to someone you didn't want to see. you moved the cap on your door viewer to peer out at whoever was intruding upon your emotional outlet. 

the fisheye you stared through revealed none other than your boyfriend, who you had completely forgotten had arranged to come over today. you blinked your eyes rather desperately, trying to make it look like you hadn’t just been sobbing your eyes out. you pushed down the handle of the door after unlocking it, slowly pulling it towards yourself. 

you kept your head slightly lowered, hoping this would make it look like you were doing fine. he stepped into the room, heels clicking a little on the floor, bright smile not wavering when he entered your home. “hey sweetheart~” he cooed, smile slightly lowering when he realised you weren’t looking at him. “hi ike,” you spoke, voice cracking as you did. 

“is everything okay?” he asked, placing a hand on your shoulder in a failed attempt to get you to look up at him. you quickly nodded before trying to walk away to the living room again. 

“hey,” he spoke, voice lower and softer than before, “look at me. are you okay?” 

you nodded once again, trying your hardest to make eye contact with him. he could tell you had been crying, so clearly your methods of trying to make yourself look happy didnt work. as your eyes met his, you spoke again, “i’m fin-”. this time, another voice crack was the result of tears welling in your eyes, and face contorting into a frown. sudden uncontrollable bawling took over as he pulled you towards him instinctually, drowned sobs making their way into his shoulder. 

he knew you struggled like this sometimes, he knew sometimes it would hurt more than others, and he learned. he was willing to learn for you, he wanted to know how to help, how to make things feel a little lighter, whilst respecting that this was your battle to fight. 

“shh, it’s alright, i’m here now,” he whispered, quiet voice reverberating against you. “you should’ve called me over” he spoke, calmly leading you towards your couch where you would be able to take a seat with him. “i didn’t want you to worry,” you mumbled into his t-shirt.

it still didn’t feel real to you, you didn’t feel normal, not like this. if there’s one thing ike values, it’s honesty. maybe voicing your concerns would help you feel better.

“nothing feels real anymore,” you whispered, “it doesn’t even feel like you’re real. you’re tangible, but it’s just- do i sound stupid?”

“no, no you don’t sound stupid. but please remember that i’m right here, i’ve always been right here, and i’ll always be right here.” he said softly, “please don’t forget that”

“i won’t” you sniffled, knowing you were safe with him. 

“so,” he opened “what can i do to help?” 

sfw masterlist

© tartigglez, 2023. do not copy, translate or repost

[joemama-2]

not naoya 😫😫😫 that man has got to be the worst out of them all noooo i dont want him to go after hana or reader 😫😫 he sounded sooo creepy god it feels like he is ready to hurt and maim anyone for his own gain 😟 grrrreat chapter i loved how constipated satoru and reader were 😂 shall we cross the line....shall we not cross the line.....hmmmm...confusing..... and satoru in the shower hellooooo 😏 not so confusing after all huh 😏😏😏 your hearts already know the answer babes so let your minds follow 🙏🏼 also i really hope satoru gets to go to his dad appreciation day and NOTHING BAD HAPPENS (threatening you now 🔪🔪🔪🔪) i have a feeling something Big Bad is going to happen and its gonna be out of anyones control but stupid naoya meimei and hamimi-whoever (fuck her and her domestic abuse and satorus acceptance of it)

anyway have there been hints in the story as to who could be behind the leak that i missed?? its not the zenins but we know it was mei mei (cough cough how did we figure it out) who would do anything for money. hanumi-whoeverthefuk clearly did not know either since she had no clue where satoru was that entire week, but that could also mean she paid mei mei to figure out what he was up to. however, she only found out through the article like everyone else if i remember correctly... she also would have benefitted more from it being kept private... it would make no sense for her to publish that information since it is such an insult to her🙄. her parents however could have a motivation we dont know about yet 🤨 hmmm🧐 i feel like a 1950s detective at this point 🤨 no worries toots i will figure it out🧐🧐🧐

..............suguru ? he was the only one who knew about koji and he clearly had some type of feelings towards reader.......and he is someone close to the gojo group.........oh mygod toots .....hand me the bourbon im on the case 🕵‍♂️ in the meantime the gojo fam can go on vacation to switzerland to relax 🙏🏼

LOLLLL okay okay yes satoru and y/ns game of dancing around the boundary line is so funny and cute to me but also frustrating. like ahhh just fuck already 🙄🙄

and this story wouldn’t be dramaesque if dad appreciation day didn’t go completely as planned 😟

anywho, there hasn’t been hints yet as to who paid meimei, they still haven’t been introduced to the story yet 🫢🫢 and keep in mind, gojos mom can be completely wrong and so on because they still don’t know and we’re seeing things through their lens

and YES switzerland vacay when????

(asking like im not the author 🙄)

[its-been-rose]

May I ask who your headcannon couples are(or like who you think can work together?) and what trope they all are? AHHHHHHH I very much love your art btw!

Okay so I’m going to assume you’re referring to my Killer Frequency headcanons because I’m a KF blog so here goes

Also THANK YOU!! That means so much!!! I really do appreciate the support!

My headcanon couples range from practically canon to lmao what if.

The first couple is Marie and George. Yes, they’re canon, but lemme explain my headcanons for their dynamic. So basically they were originally the jock x nerd stereotype, but instead of Marie being that quiet geeky stereotype, Marie was excitable, energetic and peppy. George was quite shy around most other people except for people he knew, and really came out of his shell around her (and also around Jason whom he knew well). She was big into theater and suggested he try out for the play and he did and he found out he loved it so they just became a pair of little geeks in love doing everything together and not caring what other people were doing. But he still loved sports obviously and we all know how that ended up.

Next down is Leslie x Sara (the Deputy). Y’all you cannot tell me they do not have a thing. The way Leslie got flustered when she got caught calling Sara by her first name—— aaaaaaaaa. Ok so I think their dynamic would be like they’d both try to act super cool and professional but would just end up flirting constantly at work like a bunch of idiots lol. They’d each try to impress the other and they’d find it super cute.

Further down in the lmao what if category we’ve got Forrest and Sandra. This is only here because I thought the scene of Forrest aggressively trying to slide into Sandra’s DMs was HILARIOUS and they’re both older and I think they deserve each other lmao. Their dynamic would be like Forrest is the black cat and Sandra is the golden retriever. She needs someone to chill her out and he needs someone to put some fun in his life that’s NOT just sarcastically quipping at everything lol.

Next down is Eugene and Carrie. I don’t really have much evidence for this except for the fact that they both got hunted and maybe could like bond over their experiences lol. Idk I just think Eugene deserves a nice girl who will give him the time of day, and Carrie deserves a nice boy who won’t prank her (or go along with said prank) and will treat her RIGHT.

Other than that uhhhh maybe like Peggy and Ricky??? Maybe??? I don’t really see much of a romance there but like at least platonically they’d DEFINITELY be buddies. Also the age gap is a little big but also they’re both well into adulthood and it’s not CRAZY big like Forrest and Peggy would be and also there’s no power imbalance cuz they’re both kinda doing their own thing. Idk. Would Max like a step mom?

Feel free to chime in with your headcanons or pairings either anonymously in the asks or in the comments and we can chat about it lollll

[screampied]

well, hello there. (read as lady dimitrescu’s voice)

ok, vegas, you interacted with my account…again. love, i think you’re ought to find out who i am before we can even smell october 1st. so cute that you think i’m sweet, because whenever i re-read what i wrote for you im like “oh, that’s not…that’s weird”. i also think you are very sweet! i’m intimidated with people, so indeed i took the opportunity of being high and loose and approachable to send you that first ask.

i think being a whore for ghostface is as easy as saying it’s name. the masks stays on!! do i mean sex or the killing? both? yes. hm, moving along, what’s you favorite ghostface? mine would be stu and jill.

oh, oHH. ok but toji removing the mask, slowly, and the first thing you see is his scarred lips with that smirk. like stfu, i’ll show him a scream. and geto. that man is my lawfully husband, and picturing him with that knife is doing stuff to me. blood on his face, like in hidden inventory, passing his thumb to try and clean it…mshdhdjdjdk fainted

sam as ghostface would’ve been predictable, but it would still be cool. i think they could take a different approach with her. while everyone is scared shitless because a knew killer has show up, she would be excited because-well, she can kill now. again and again, with the excuse of saving her friends and sister. maybe might even kill someone by “mistake” who knows. i think it would be nice, i like the idea of the good character going a lil crazy crazy.

the thing about sidney is that they won’t have the courage to kill her. literal mother of the final girls. but… dale? yeah, i’m bracing myself and praying for her poor little soul.

yes!! they were right in what they did and the ones that loses are the directors. the movie won’t do good at all without them, so must likely they will comeback, as we say in my country, “the sorry dog comes back” as in the directors are the sorry dog, with tail in between their legs.

between cars and bikes im more inclined to cars, but bikers and drivers? ugh, i’m sold to the bikers. sukuna is the type of guy to go to street races just for the fun of nearly dying (in a modern world, of course). i picture a red vintage car with black flames draw in it. oh he would so sexy, he is sexy. others i can see in street race is toji (of course, he bets all the time) and suguru. idk this trinity can have me anytime any day anywhere.

SHUT UP HUNGER GAMES IS SO FUCKING COOL

i used to be a divergent person, but hunger games has grow in my heart. finnick and peeta forever the best boys, suzanne collins cooked with them. and then she fucking burned it with finnick’s. still not over it, how come gale is alive???

jokes aside, i actually fuck with her writing so much, because it’s true, there is no actual victory in a war, we lose too much to be able to live through it. too much nightmares and death.

i’m reading a fanfic set in the hunger games universe, nearly as many words as in the bible, and it’s so fucking good. the author wrote the aftermath of the games perfectly, the rebellion, missions, the games itself. it’s everything.

yapping is done, question of the day is favorite movie and favorite music? see ya!!

nut anon

SLLLAAAY

nutty pook i rly enjoy our long chats i just wanna let u know that 🫡. also the lady dimitrescu voice ????? stawp. do you play resident evil oh now that game is my shit.

LOLLLL DID I. i swear it’s not intentional man. maybe it’s fate 🧿🧿 you think im sweet omg ty AAAAH.

sex with ghostface where the mask stays on is actually cry FUCKKK IM GONNA WRITE THAT. october is gonna bring out the slut in my writing istg. ooooh my fav ghostface ?? probably jill and roman. i love amber too, but billy ofc.

GHOSTFACE TOJIIII DONT DO THIS TO ME. he’s so do that, don’t mind me im writing this down 🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️. real they can’t kill the baddest bitch, the whole franchise is nothing without mother.

sukuna as a street racer ID CREEWWAM. i literally saw a sukuna car at the race i went to. i had many interesting thoughts ……. kuna def bets ur so right, toji too with his broke ass.

KEKFLGLHL I LOVE THG ITS SO GOOD. do you like the movies or books better? i like the books but the movies slap

fav movie uhhhhh legally blond, fav music psychedelic pop and indie !!!!

[aprillikesthings]

I had originally promised msyelf I wouldn't live-tweet or live-blog my rewatch of she-ra (mostly bc it will make it take FOREVER to watch the whole thing) but...fuck it

THIS IS A REWATCH. I've forgotten plenty of it, but I still remember plenty too, and that's all going to bias how I react to things, and obviously there will be spoilers, and also I don't plan to react to EVERYTHING bc it would just take too long okay? okay

Edit: ....yeah this took me nearly two hours for one episode oops

First of all let me point out how hilarious it is to me that when scrolling back through my tags I found myself posting MULTIPLE TIMES that I wanted to write the kind of fic I'm working on but knew I'd need to rewatch the whole series to do it right and now FOUR YEARS LATER I'm finally giving up and doing it.

why am i like this lol

ANYWAY

NETFLIX IT HAS BEEN A COUPLE OF YEARS and I know he's legally changed his name WHY is Nate/ND's old name still on here

THat's....that's Angella. That's a terrible propaganda poster of Angella. I'm cracking up how did I not notice that before

Okay the very first time Adora says Catra's name I lol'ed bc I've watched this fanvid (which came out after s2) a truly bananapants number of times and it's just what I immediately thought of

I started reading a fic recently that I couldn't get into and gave up on, but it pointed out something that seems OBVIOUS NOW: the reason the Horde is all children/teenagers is like, the whole "destroying the villages of Etheria" thing. Just slaughtering the parents and stealing the kids.

Then again maybe they said that in canon and I forgot. Dumb shit like that is of course why I'm rewatching.

Someone pointed out that both Adora and Catra obviously have ADHD and I cannot unsee it

I mean yeah that's...that's her entire motivation

(I mean not quite in the way Adora means it here but)

I will never, ever be over how fast this show started baiting them as a pairing. I remember the first time I watched the first episodes saying "the people who made this came from fandom and they know exactly how to get us."

Catra nails Shadow Weaver's motivation--"She's just mad she doesn't have any real power that doesn't come from Hordak and everyone knows it." And then calls Adora a "people-pleaser." She's not wrong.

Like, Catra understands the motivations etc of everyone but herself

(...something something abused children something C-PTSD something hypervigilance)

Catra's tail swishing just like a real cat's does when angry is A+

Re: stealing the skiff: Catra's supposed to be the one with bad impulse control but Adora is just as bad!! (it's the ADHD)

...pulling a random pretty sword out of the ground that's lit up like a quest in a video game is also poor impulse control lollll

I still crack up at this one and am still surprised I haven't read a fic that makes a big deal out of hair-pulling

Bow folding up random laundry on the floor and asking where it goes while talking to Glimmer is some nice early character-building. "This boy is not a sexist douchebag."

I mean the outfit helps too lol

Okay so on the one hand I know character age wank is fucking stupid, but also I get why people were like "...are these all minors or what" considering Glimmer's being grounded and then arguing with her mom like a high-schooler. My own parents (who were more controlling than most) stopped actually "grounding" me once I was 18--they just forbid me from using the car for anything but work or school because they owned it. Which is why they owned the car. Anyway.

(True story: that was their punishment for me getting bad grades at community college, and my response to this was to quit school, buy my own car, and move in with my then-boyfriend's family)

I wonder if Adora running off to do things on her own in order to attempt to protect people she cares about without asking them if that's even something they want her to do will be a continuing theme for her 🤔

omg the way they did her eyes/face makes Glimmer look so fucking creepy here

SO MUCH HAIR-PULLING poor Adora

I FORGET WHAT THIS SAYS I know it's an actual "alphabet" and people get tattoos and shit

(so, SO many tattoos of the failsafe...)

(okay but let's be honest a tattoo of the failsafe from the last episode is a really great way of finding other nerdy sapphics, they'd be the only ones to recognize it)

This is kinda heavy-handed ("don't just believe everything authority figures tell you, kids!") but also this show was aimed at like 12-year-olds so

Yeah this absolutely reminds me of conversations I've had over multiple decades about LGBT people and how people who know us as friends, coworkers, neighbors; realize we're Just People and are less likely to be dicks to us--not always, but often. Adora has never met a princess, so it was easy for the Horde to convince her they're all evil.

OH MAN this scene reminds me SO MUCH of the one in Arcane where Ekko is talking to Caitlyn about how Piltover/the Enforcers are fucking over the people of Zaun/the Undercity

Yeah good lord I could do a line-by-line dialogue comparison.

"Woman who has always been on the side of what she thought was The Law finds out everything she's ever known is a fucking lie and actually, she's been part of a force oppressing and destroying other people and immediately wants to fix things"

*squints at Caitlyn and Adora*

We never do find out who Grayskull is, but that's because Netflix doesn't have the rights to the He-Man stuff, and I admit this was probably the best way to keep She-Ra's signature line without getting into that

OKAY FIRST EP OVER omg

[practicalmagicintuitions]

https://www.tumblr.com/practicalmagicintuitions/714144389647253504/hc-nv-relationship-and-career?source=share

lollll you did a reading where you said she is actually pregnant, when in 2021 you swore that by october 2021 they would have breakup when you were doing many readings. anyway i still have all the screencaps of what you used to post in 2021 and 2022. you are a fraud. when you use to receive ask and people were telling you they would stay togheter-never breakup-have kids and married you were always saying it wont happen and they would break up and you would insult the anons who send you the ask. i always knew you were a fraud since 2021. pathetic.

Actually this ask is so idiotic, I had to take a minute before answering.

First: Prove me they didn’t broke up in october and then back together. Give me the proof!

You have the screencaps? Congrats and I have all of my readings unchanged since I posted them so acting like having screencaps it’s something will scare me or something you have over me is ridiculous. Enjoy the screencaps, I don’t care, don’t even understand why you mentioned them. But you come across obsessive so it was not a good look.

I am not a fraud, I advise you to check all of my readings that come true (including the very first one before their first papwalk when I said he has someone and he is expecting much from this relationship. Amd few days later, boom, papwalk).

You know what is interesting? You don’t care about the scarely accurate business readings because you don’t care about HC. You only butthurt because he is still with NV. And you probably never had a serious relationship in your life otherwise you would know a fresh relationship have different potentials as a solid, older ones.

All of you make me rooting for NV and it makes me uncomfortable, but seeing you unable to cope with their relationship is just too funny.

You are miserable because of you. Not because HC is with NV, not because I predicted they will broke up and they haven’t yet. Every negative feeling is in your head and it poisons your cells, soul and life. Probably you thought I will be upset or scared because of your rant but actually just made me feel sorry for you. And besides that I just don’t care because you came here with intentionally hurting me. Not give me feedback or constructive criticism so feeling sorry for you is way more that you deserve from me.

[thaleleah]

So sorry this is so late, hun! But holy craaaap this was amazing! For someone that hasn't seen the show, this was so incredibly well written and I knew this was gonna be a gem just because it was you that wrote it but I couldn't have asked for a better fic. I think you captured Billy's personality perfectly!

/definitely not historically actuate but you are reading about getting railed by billy-the-kid so you can fuck off if you have a problem with it./

You know what..... you're right 😌

/You would catch him staring at you from across the market. He would try to talk to you every chance he got. Always trying to find out more about you. He was awkward mostly, unfitting to his position of power. Despite his eager attempts to gain an audience with you, his eyes often floated around the room, and the conversation topics only always grazed the surface. 

Nevertheless when you excused yourself from him, he always seemed disappointed but never stopped you/

This is so in character for him. He's actually is such an awkward young man who is forced into this intimidating and dangerous position of power and its so accurate to see how he takes charge of his position now but still fumbles when it comes to love and personal matters lolllll

/Billy greets the shopkeeper respectfully but the men he is with are arrogant and begin playing with the objects on display./ and /Billy takes it first and places the small pouch in his pocket, thanking the man, and asking about his family./

I love that you emphasize Billy's respectful qualities! That's such a huge part of his personality and frankly so incredibly hot for no reason lmaoooo. Asking about the man's family? 😍

/"You look awful pretty today"

"You say that every day, Mr Bonney".

“I mean it every day”./

YOU LITTLE ROMANTIC YOU, BILLY. He's got the rizz

/“Well we ain't strangers” he says as he nestles up beside you again./

Nope, we are not strangers, my delusional little psycho. We've been secretly dating and actually already engaged since before we even officially met in your mind

/Thank you for seeing me home, Mr Bonney”, You try.

“Anytime Miss Y/N. Maybe one day you could invite me around, and we could have tea”./

Yes, sir! Whenever you want, sir! My legs--- oh i mean door is always open for you, sir!

/The Regulators go to move out before the rest of the guests but Billy blocks the path by putting his hand on the front pew. Manners were important to Billy but less so to his group./

Me when Billy is strict and enforcing respect:

/You spin out from his arms in sync with the other girls. It reached the part of the song where partners were swapped but Billy held tight to your hand and spun you back into him, leaving the next man looking for his new dance partner./

Billy being possessiveeeeeeeee 🥵🥵🥵 So fucking hot

/“I don’t know what you mean, but you better get that gun out of my face before I put you down”.

You shrink yourself as small as you could against Billy back. His hold tightens as he feels you move. 

Harold scoffs, “You ain’t that quick”. 

“Yes, I am” he threatens./

"Yes, I am" - BREAK MY BACK LIKE A GLOWSTICK WHY IS THAT SO HOT

/Your days became dull again without the excitement of Billy. Your chores became chores again without the added threat of Billy laying in wait. 

Miss may be a strong word, but something felt off when he wasn’t around. You figure you had gotten so used to a state of anxiety that normalcy felt strange./

Miss girl got a little bit of a fear kink?? 👀 I too crave to be stalked by Billy lollll. Who wants normalcy when you could have Billy?

/You sleep with the thought of him on your mind. Who would protect the town if not him? Who would fill your days with excitement and wonder? You scold yourself for the latter thought./

Giiiiirllllll just fuck him! You know you want tooooo

Side note tho: I really like the concept of him being the unofficial law and main protection of everyone in town (like in the dark/bad boy sense but also as a kindness) but also being her main source of anxiety. Idk why but there's something so attractive about him technically being the ultimate protector/"good person" for everyone else except her. Probs a form of authority kink? Idk lol. Idk if that actually made sense or not.

/His name never gets off your lips. It’s sealed shut by a strong gloved hand pressed over your mouth, and the feeling of a cool barrel of a gun pressed into the side of your head./

HELLO HI MR BONNEY IS DONE PLAYING OUR FUCKING GAMES

/“I’ve missed you these past few days. Been real lonely without you”. He kicks the dirt under his shoe and watches as it jumps from his force. 

“We were never friends, Billy”. 

Billy. The name seemed to have just fallen off your lips. 

The sound of his name gave him courage to look up at you.

“You’re right. You’re right. We skipped that stage”./

"We were never friends, Billy" OUCH! You know that hurt him to hear 😭 Poor baby daydreams every second of every day of his future life with her and she's trying to say they aren't friends? For shameeeee.

Also i love that her saying his first name finally is what ultimately gave him the motivation to do what he needed to do. He probably almost came in his pants hearing her say it

/“You know God told me that you were the woman for me’’.

“Did he?” you ask cautiously. 

“Years ago. I saw you in town, I said ‘God, if she’s the one make her drop her bracelet’. And you did”. 

He reaches into his vest pocket pulling out his pocket watch to show you the chain. He brought it over to you. In the light you could see that he had melted the gold of your bracelet to his small gold watch and fashioned it into his pocket watch that he carried daily. The ends of the bracelet were melded but the gold that was braided together looked identical to the bracelet you had lost/

BRUH THATS SO CUTE. He fused it to his watch so he could carry a part of her with him all the time 🥰 How romantic

/“If I can’t make you see my love, I can make you feel it”. /

/The shake of your body is attributed to many things, the cold air that swarmed you, the shame and fear of it all, the fact that it was your first time being bare to a man. Billy took it to mean the cold and adjusted the blankets so they were pressed up against the sides of your body./

HE'S SO CONSIDERATE. We love a considerate man

/You had no intention of killing him. You had just wanted to touch it. The gun of Billy-the-kid./

No cause same tho

/“What? What do you want my gun for?” As he leans up to reach for it and you feel his cock push up into your stomach. 

He brings it out of his holster with the barrel pointed at your head, but his finger is far from the trigger. 

“Don’t you know a man’s gun is part of him? You should ask a man before you touch it”.

The gun pushes further and down to your lips. Billy’s eyes were dark. The awkward boy that used to court you was buried in the furthest part of him.

“Open your mouth” he commands. 

With the taste of metal at your teeth, you do part your lips enough for the tip of the gun. A struggle could lead to an accidental misfire. 

His thrusts in time with the movement of the gun. His eyes focus on your lips, the way they curl around his barrel. 

The metallic taste overwhelmed your tongue and your nose. It felt as if you could still taste the smoke on it. You are slow in your movements so not to startle him as you pull your head back./

/“Fuck” he sputters, his eyes close and he picks up pace, “That was hot”./

YEAH TELL ME ABOUT IT - everything about that scene was hot

/“The only way I would hurt you now is by leaving you. No man but those desperate or widowed would have you after I am done. Your family would never recover their name. Now I’ve made it clear that we are to get married, so no hurting is being done”. 

His fingers dig into your hips so hard that there was sure to be bruises littering the skin tomorrow. 

“Ain’t no sin for a husband and wife to become one”./

The manipulation is top tier lmaoooo, especially for his personality. But he's not wrong tho. He's fucked her up in more ways than one

/“I built you a house, you know. Told myself I couldn’t touch you until I drove the final nail in, and the day I do, you appear at the market a day earlier than you usually would. We’re connected. Every bad thing has led me here to you”./

HE BUILT HER A HOUSE! This man is a gem, idk what Reader is talking about

/“Yes. again. We gotta make sure we put a baby in you”, he states, positioning his body once again over yours./

You gotta do what you gotta do 🤷🏻‍♀️

You got my heart in my throat thinking that Billy was gonna have to kill her dad 😭

/“This is your room for when you need your space. I won’t step foot into it”. He looks at you expecting you to be overjoyed but finds you glaring back at him./

He's so fucking sweet I caaaaaaaaaaan'ttttt

And awwww, that ending is so sweet! Stockholm Syndrome is so sweet LMAOO. I hope she gets the baby girl she's hoping for

Fantastic fic, hun! I loved it 🧡

To have and to hold.

1/1 Disclaimer: I have not watched Billy the kid. This story is based on an internet search, and a can do mentality. No cannon events or characters.

Warnings: Dark!billy-the-kid, non-con, light stalking, technical kidnapping, spit, mature, 18+ only, porn-with-little-plot, non-fandom based writing, Reader POV, reader not described but can be picked up, definitely not historically actuate but you are reading about getting railed by billy-the-kid so you can fuck off if you have a problem with it. Dead dove, do not eat.

A/N: I am so sorry that this was late, and also rushed. The tent scene felt like I was pulling teeth out. I had no idea where I was going with it.

unedited.

You always knew Billy had a crush on you.

You would catch him staring at you from across the market. He would try to talk to you every chance he got. Always trying to find out more about you. He was awkward mostly, unfitting to his position of power. Despite his eager attempts to gain an audience with you, his eyes often floated around the room, and the conversation topics only always grazed the surface. 

Nevertheless when you excused yourself from him, he always seemed disappointed but never stopped you. 

You never minded the attention. You were flattered by it. Before him, none of the town's men paid you too much mind. Your family wasn’t rich, and your face was too plain to gain attention away from the wealthy girls.

It helped too that it was handsome. Dangerous. Big broad shoulders and striking eyes. He was good at his craft. Some say the best.

He was good enough to keep the vultures away from town. For a price. Him and his gang kept the town safe for a portion of everyone’s profits. It was a small profit compared to what he could have asked but added up quickly amongst the business that bloomed with his protection.

The regulators became the law after running out the corrupt and keeping out wild gangs that would come and pillage.

There were worse men to be left in charge. Overall his reputation was good but money was to be paid, or houses were to be burned down.

He had men to look after. They had to be fed and housed with a few extra dollars in their pockets to halt their boisterous nature.

From the few times he did use a heavy hand, it left a strong reminder to the community that Billy’s word was law.

Even with his sheriff- like position, he was still considered an outlaw. Wanted in multiple counties. Wanted in yours not too long ago. Before he and his crew became the new law. So you had to keep your distance as much as you could, and avoid situations where you could be seen alone with him. The town mostly thought of you as a poor target for Billy but a few whispers about you were already causing damage to your reputation.

 Anyone connected to the regulators was treated differently. People wanted to distance themselves from the group that controlled the area. Anyone found being too friendly with the Regulators were ostracized. Your family couldn't afford to be outcast. The family business relied on steady connections and loyal customers. 

So you don’t mind the flirtatious talk in private or burning stares so long as it never proceeds from that.

To help this, you avoided him where you could but some days it felt as if he knew your schedule better than you did. 

You tried to switch it up by going to town a day earlier than you usually would, but fate had it that it was the same day as Billy’s collection. 

People hush as Billy and two of his men come into the convenience store. Some leave while others push themselves to the back of the store. You try and hide your face behind a series of hanging baskets as you watch the group walk confidently in. 

Billy greets the shopkeeper respectfully but the men he is with are arrogant and begin playing with the objects on display. You knew them as Jim Greathouse, and Tom O’Folliard. Both long-standing members of the Regulators. 

“Good evening, Mr O’Conoly. How are you today?”

“Good, Billy. Thank you”. The shopkeeper places a pouch of money on top of the counter for the men to take. 

Billy takes it first and places the small pouch in his pocket, thanking the man, and asking about his family. 

You try to make your escape moving from behind the baskets towards the door. Your face heated with just the thought of talking to Billy in a room full of people. In passing or at a public event was unavoidable, your townspeople knew that, but talking so friendly in a shop. It would bring your family shame if it came across too familiar.

But you were too hasty in your exit, your feet too hard against the floor. The shuffling caught his attention. Worried that he might be offended with your behavior, you pretend to look at the pears on display as if contemplating. 

The sound of his feet against the floorboards matched the beating of your heart. 

You pretend to look busy as you inspect the pears but could feel his searing stare as he approached you.

“Miss y/n”’ he took off his hat as he spoke as a sign of respect.

You nodded your head towards him as a sign of respect back, “Mr Bonney”.

“Billy. You can call me Billy”.

You nod back with a tight smile, keeping your eyes focused on the produce in front of you. To encourage Billy by calling him by familiar terms may give him the wrong impression.

"You look awful pretty today"

"You say that every day, Mr Bonney".

“I mean it every day”. He stands close to you, leaning his frame over yours. With his height it could have been intimidating but you knew he meant no harm.

“Did you need help shopping today? I could carry your basket for you” His fingers reach out to your basket but you tug it back against you. 

“Thank you, Mr Bonney, but I will not be buying anything today. I must get home. I suddenly don’t feel well”. 

“Wait” He reaches out and gently captures your arm to stop you from turning. It was the first time he had ever touched you. It felt like you had been zapped with electricity. 

You pull quickly out of his grasp and look around the shop. People were staring at the scene. One wrong step and it could be the end of your family's good name. You step further back from him, solidifying that he was the same person to them as he was to you. 

Billy holds his hands flat out in surrender, telling you he had no further plans of touching you. 

“I was just wondering if you planned to be at Maria's wedding?”. 

Maria was a friend of yours, of course you would be at her wedding. You wondered why he was asking, he knew this too. 

She was often with you when he approached. More than that her soon-to-be husband was friendly with Billy, and borrowed from the Regulators to finance a farm. 

Because of that, would he now be invited to the wedding? Would you be stuck avoiding him the whole night?

“I do,” you respond. If you lied and he was invited it would be an uncomfortable evening, but has telling the truth now placed you in a difficult spot?

“I was wondering if you might fancy a dance or two with me?”

A sudden loud clanking noise stole the spotlight from you. Jim had knocked a table of grain and spilled it over the floor along with the serving cup. Tom bellowed at his friend's mistake, kneeling over from laughter. 

“I am sorry, sir” Billy said to the shopkeeper, “He will pay for that”. 

Tom laughs louder, earning a shove from Jim. 

“Clean it up” Billy demands with a click of his fingers. Jim snatched a nearby rag and kneeled upon the floor under Billy’s stare. You make a quick exist while he is distracted but he follows you across the floor. 

The shopkeepers goes to help clean up the mess by bringing a broom but he is insulated by Jim as he nears. He throws the dirty rag at the man and questions why he didn’t bring a broom sooner. 

Billy’s attention is once again caught. He looks at you as you pass through the door but Jim continues to hurl insults at the undeserving shopkeep. Billy turns direction away from you to deal with the situation. 

“Hey. He’s paid his dues. Leave him alone” was the last thing you heard as you raced down the steps and to the path back home. 

You bash your hand against your forehead as you take the dirt path back to your home. It felt good to release some of the tension you felt. You had kept your composure through your walk through the back of town but could feel it bubbling under the surface. 

You should have left as soon as he entered the store. Now you were left in difficult position and only the feeling of dread around your friends wedding. 

How would you be able to avoid him for the entire time? Your only hope is that he will avoid you while you are with your family. 

You swing your empty basket. The trip to town and back was a 40 minute walk across a hard pebble road. You’d have to make it again tomorrow. 

You wondered if you would see him again. Billy normally placed himself in town to correspond with your schedule. 

Would he ask for a dance again or had you wounded his pride? What is the right answer? 

Yes would leave the town talking for weeks. Might even affect your fathers business.

 No might make you an enemy of the Regulators.  Which is the last thing you wanted to be. 

Perhaps if you took more chores, your sister would take your trip to town. 

She was stubborn though. Would want more than her fair share to swap tasks. You begin your negotiations in your head. 

Preparing for when you get home, when the sound of galloping horse upon the gravel approaches you. You move from the path to let the horseman pass, but it slows next to you. 

You look up at the rider, just making out his face under the sun. 

“Mr Bonney. What are you doing?”. 

You eye the area to see no one else. A blessing and a curse. 

He swings off his horse next to you.  

“You said you felt ill. I thought it was best to see you home alright”.

“I’ll be fine. Thank you, Mr Bonney”.

“Please, I insist. Riding would be faster than walking”.

“How would that look, sir? Sharing a horse?”.

“You could sit, and I’ll walk him along,” he suggests. His hat covers his face in shadows. It made it hard to see how he was processing your words.

“No, thank you, sir. The walk would be good for me. You go on now”. 

“I’ll walk alongside you”. He readies the reins of his horse between his hand for a walking pace.

“There’s really no need” you try. 

“There’s also nothing stopping me” he returns. 

It puts you back on one foot. He had never spoken to you like that before. Conversations about the weather, and upcoming community events were the only things really talked about. Sometimes he would ask after your family, and your health. But he found that broader, more unfamiliar topics worked best to elicit a conversation. 

You once helped him pick out a ripe watermelon when he asked you but he had never refused to stop bothering you. 

He walked beside you with his shoulder almost touching yours. You try to create distance by walking on the edge of the road. The rocks slip off the edge of the road under your feet. It makes for an uncomfortable walk, in which your ankle twists from the uneven ground. 

“It looks like rain” he looks up to the sky and its dark forming clouds, “I sure hope it clears before the wedding”. 

You tense as he brings up the wedding. It was surely a ploy to reintroduce his offer. In an attempt to discourage him, you only offer him a nod. 

One wrong step and you tumble of balance towards the surrounding dirt. 

“Careful” he hand latches on to your arm, pulling you back on the path. He moves himself and his horse over to the center of the road, pulling you along with his hold, “Don’t want you breaking an ankle before our dance”. 

You paused to consider a broken ankle as your way of escaping the dance, but it would immobilise you and Billy was sure to sit by your side the entire night. 

“I don’t dance, Mr Bonney. Two left feet I am afraid”. 

“We’ll get along fine”

“I might not be well enough to attend anyway”. 

“Oh” he looks ahead at the road, “That would be a shame”.

The horse kicks, impatient with her pace. 

“Settle” he commanded with a pat to its nose. 

“She’s used to going fast,” he tells you. 

“Please, Mr Bonney. I would hate to upset your horse”. You gesture for him to go forward and leave you.

He laughs at you. A sweet, airy laugh. 

“She'll be fine”.

You knew he meant you no harm. Even as you walk with him miles from anyone you felt no fear. So you walk in a comfortable silence next to him, your feet falling into step with his own. 

“If you need a break, let me know,” he spoke. 

You wondered why he said such a thing, forgetting your own lie. Quick in your recoup you bring your hand to your forehead 

“I will be fine. Home is not too far off”. 

He offers you a drink from his water flask which you decline. He had reached for it although from his saddle and you still him with a hand on his shoulder. It freezes him.

In return his eyes freeze you as he peers back over his shoulder.

You’re not sure why but an apology falls from your lips. 

“No” he assures, “No-I”. 

Neither of you were sure where to go.

He puts the flask back, turning to you with empty hands. 

You didn't notice that you had stopped walking until his horse kicked impatiently.

“I have to get home” you state. 

You pick up speed and return to the silence as you walk alongside him. 

Out of nowhere and somewhat timidly he reaches a hand out and places it on your shoulder. 

You jump back at the unexpected contact. Half expecting the hand to claw and punch you down to the ground. But it releases. 

He squints his eyes at you, surprised at your reaction. 

“You don’t think I would hurt you. Do you?”

You weren’t sure. He’s never been aggressive towards you. But stories of him being a dangerous man made their way around the community. 

“No, Mr Bonney”. 

With home so close it urges you to pick up the pace. He keeps it easily. 

“Is that why you didn’t want me to walk you home? Because you thought I would hurt you? Y/N, I would never”.

His hand once again goes up to touch you but you knock it away. 

“Mr Bonney, may I remind you that you are a stranger to me. That I am an unmarried woman, and you are an unmarried man. If some one were to mistake this situation, it could cause great damage to my reputation. My family's reputation, and livelihood".

He looked hurt that you had spoken to him like that. He stopped his fast pace beside you, and you took the opportunity to continue on without him. 

“Well we ain't strangers” he says as he nestles up beside you again. 

The walk turned silent again and it remained that way as you passed through the wide field to your home. 

Your small family home comes into view, and thought perhaps you could shake him. But he doesn’t leave you as you open your gate. 

“Thank you for seeing me home, Mr Bonney”, You try.

“Anytime Miss Y/N. Maybe one day you could invite me around, and we could have tea”.

You slam the gate shut between you. By allowing him to walk you home, does he think that you were opening up to him? 

“I am not sure my father would approve”. 

Billy’s eyes fall to the ground. He doesn’t look up as he speaks. 

“I see”, he states, “Well, rest up and I’ll see you at the wedding”.

You hear the talking of your mother and sister as they bring the washing back up to the house. If they came too close, he would try to start a friendly conversation with them. The risk of your father seeing, and shooting is already high. You needn’t add to it. 

“Goodbye, Mr Bonney”, you bid. 

You leave him at the gate, scoping your mother and sister into your arms and back into the house. 

—

The day of the wedding came. The whole house woke up in excitement but you felt more heavy than you should have. 

You tried to strike a balance between dressing nice and dressing too nice that Billy would think you dressed up for him.

Luckily, Miara relied on you the whole day to complete last minute things. While the others were gathered in front of the church, you were in the field gathering flowers for her bouquet. After that you helped her dress and do her hair. It all kept you away from the guests right up to the wedding. 

You dash inside the small church to find your seat before the bride was ready to come in. 

You saw not only him but the entire group of the Regulators sitting at that back corner out of the way. They were all clean and dressed nicely to Billy’s request. Their hats were taken off their heads in respect, and not one of them spoke. 

Billy’s body shifted as he saw you. It straightened, slightly turning towards you as you walked up the aisle to your family. You could feel his eyes on you as you walked. You couldn’t help looking back at him. 

You took your seat next to your sister in time for the band to start the wedding march. Maria slowly walks down the aisle, you try to keep you focused on her during all of the service but his stare burns a hole in the back of your head. 

All too soon the ceremony was over. Maria and her new husband stop to greet Billy as they pass. Maria’s husband gets a firm handshake as Billy says something to him and Maria is brought in for a kiss on the cheek. 

They acted like old friends despite their true relationship as debtor and debtee. 

Once the newlyweds make it to the door signaling for the rest to follow, you form a barrier of your family to keep you away from Billy as you pass him. The Regulators go to move out before the rest of the guests but Billy blocks the path by putting his hand on the front pew. Manners were important to Billy but less so to his group.

Billy and the Regulators walked behind the guests to the reception held in the field of the newlyweds' new farmstead. The couple had hired a live band, and borrowed tables and chairs.  Candles and a large fire was lit as it darkened. People danced and laughed amongst the Regulators, but you found yourself trying to keep busy to avoid any conversation. 

If you remained for too long in one spot, you could feel Billy closing in. Only the request from your friend on her big day made you pause. She needed help dishing up the punch as the speeches would begin soon. 

All your efforts of the night were wasted as you distributed the drink into the many cups. You were a sitting duck, and you could see Billy closing in. You rush, half spilling the punch on the table. People distracted him as he made his way over. It gave you hope you could finish before he reached you. 

“Whoa, slow down” Maria jeered. 

“Sorry. Can you find someone else to do this? Mr Bonney is coming over and if I get trapped talking to him it will ruin my night”. 

Maria slaps your arm hard causing you to spill a whole cup of punch. 

“I won’t hear that talk about Billy. Not after what he did”. 

Your friend goes back to pouring but she has now peaked your interest. 

“What did he do?” you ask. 

Maria places her cup down and leans closer to you as if it was a secret. 

“Our wedding present was the farm. We own it. Debt free. He let us off”.

An expensive wedding present from a man who barely knows the couple. It was also a dangerous thing to do. How many people will now be expecting debt to be wiped free after every major life event. 

Billy made his way over. You don’t turn from Maria but she ecstatically greets him. 

“Can I lend a hand, Maria?”. He stands too close, your shoulder almost touching him. 

Maria declined his offer of help but he picks up the empty cups and holds them out for you to fill. 

You don’t speak to him as you work but he continues to swap the cups under you. 

“Let's start passing these out” Maria spoke to you, picking up a tray and disappearing into the party. You follow suit, picking up your tray without a word, but Billy takes it from you, placing it back on the table. 

“I was wondering if you were ready for the dance you promised me?”.

“There are many girls here, Mr Bonney, who are dying for a dance”. You hint at him. You look to your father who is watching you from his group of friends. 

“That may be so”. He is resolved to his position. Although you knew it was unintentional his hand went to his gun holster light resting on the leather belt. 

 It was best not to make a scene so you give him a curt nod and head towards the crowd of people dancing. A dance at a wedding is hardly anything scandalous. He follows close and when he feels like you are far enough into the dance floor he takes your wrist into his hand and spins you towards him. 

“Are you having a good time?’’ he asks as you move together to the festive music.

“Yes”. You wish you could have said more but your brain felt muddled with him so close. You could feel his strong shoulders as you rest your arm around his neck, and his strong fingers squeezed around yours.

“It didn’t rain” he comments. 

“No” you agree. 

“You look beautiful in that dress”

“Thank you. I borrowed it from my sister”.

A man calls out to Billy, taking the attention off you for the second that it took Billy to give an acknowledging nod. 

You spin out from his arms in sync with the other girls. It reached the part of the song where partners were swapped but Billy held tight to your hand and spun you back into him, leaving the next man looking for his new dance partner. 

Billy jerks his head in the direction of the girl who was supposed to take your place.

“Over there” he suggests. 

The dance continues and you resume your position as Billy’s dance partner. 

“That’s not how that dance goes” you scold. 

“Not going to let you go that easy”.

He spins you out and back in again, “You told me you were two left feet. You seem to be doing alright to me”, he says as he holds you close. 

You push yourself out of his hold and back  into dancing formation. Cozy in the arms of the judge, jury and executor is not a good look. 

“That may be because you are two right feet”.  

He laughs causing you to giggle with him but you were acutely aware of your fathers protective stare. 

“See we make the perfect pair” he boasts. 

His remark silences you. Too many flirtatious exchanges could leave the wrong impression. 

“How are you feeling?” Billy asks softly, “I ain’t spinning you too much, am I? Did you want to sit with me for a bit?” 

“No” better to get the dancing out of the way for the night, “no, I feel fine”. 

He doesn’t spin you again. Instead keeping you close in a gently swaying motion. You follow his lead around the floor. A few stared but most were too consumed with themselves to notice. Only your father paid true attention. 

“Maria told me that you forgave the debt on the land” you said after a moment of nothing but dancing. 

He nods back, a small smile on his lips as he looks out to the other dancers. He was pleased that you knew.

“I did. We want to see prosperity in this land. Farmers are important in that”.

Suddenly his jaw became hard, and his hold loosened. 

“Wouldn’t that be right, Harold?”. 

His change confused you. Instead of dancing with you, he had pushed your body behind his, gripping the fabric of your dress around your waist to keep you still, and had his gun pointed straight. 

You move as much as you could to see Harold Fern, the baker in your community. He looked disheveled as he held out a shotgun.  His hair was a mess, his clothes half done up and wrinkled His cheeks and nose burned red with intoxication. 

“You son of a bitch” slurred Harold, “You took everything from me”. 

“I don’t know what you mean, but you better get that gun out of my face before I put you down”.

You shrink yourself as small as you could against Billy back. His hold tightens as he feels you move. 

Harold scoffs, “You ain’t that quick”. 

“Yes, I am” he threatens. 

Harold sways as he thinks about Billy’s statement giving Billy the time to try and talk so sense into the man. 

“I don’t want to hurt you, Harold. Don’t make me. Whatever you think I have done, I am sure we can fix it”. 

“Your taxes put me out of business. My fathers business, my fathers’ fathers business. You and your gang come in demanding a share from the work you don’t do”. 

 ‘I am sorry, Harold, Truely. But your business would have been gone long ago if it weren’t for us. You think the Casa gang would have left anything if they were successful in their attack? We stopped them. What do you think would have been left of this town if we didn’t?”. 

With the man subdued, you move from where you pressed up against Billy’s back to move from the line of fire. But Billy’s hold on your dress would not loosen. You resumed your spot against his back, hoping that the bullet would not go straight through. 

“If it’s a loan you need I can give it to you, but I can also send you to the grave after your father if your finger itches towards that trigger anymore”.

“Billy!” you hear a voice of one of the regulators. The surrounding people gasp as another gun is brought out. 

“It’s alright. Harolds here just had too much to drink. Why don’t you take him back to his house and i’ll be by tomorrow to see if we can figure out a solution to his problem”. 

Harold must have chosen to drop the gun because you heard the shoving and shouting from Billy’s man and not the ricochet of a gun. 

The grip on your dress is released and Billy turns towards you placing his hands on your shoulders. 

“Are you okay?”. 

You shake him off, aware of the audience still staring at you. Billy follows your gaze around the crowd. 

“It’s alright everyone. Let’s get the music going again’’ 

Billy raises his hand to your arm once more but you are pushed away before it lands. Your father had come to your rescue quickly pushing you through the crowd. You look back at Billy. He doesn’t move. Just stares until you are out of sight. 

You don’t see Billy for the next week. His men did his collections. You only saw them around town, never him. You figure he was laying low after the wedding incident. 

Your days became dull again without the excitement of Billy. Your chores became chores again without the added threat of Billy laying in wait. 

Miss may be a strong word, but something felt off when he wasn’t around. You figure you had gotten so used to a state of anxiety that normalcy felt strange. 

He would return, you ensured yourself, just enjoy it while it lasts.  

On the tenth night of his absence from your life you think that maybe he had skipped town, and you would never see him again. The Regulators would need a new leader and you shudder thinking who it could be. 

You sleep with the thought of him on your mind. Who would protect the town if not him? Who would fill your days with excitement and wonder? You scold yourself for the latter thought. He was an outlaw. A villain. Blood soaked his hands.  He was a bad man. The leader of bad men. You sleep with hateful thoughts of the Regulators and their leader. 

You wake with the sound of your dog scratching at your door. Begging to be let out. The night was cold. Even with a large blanket and the windows shut, you shivered. 

You sigh as you get up, quickly looking for your robe. It would do little to keep the cold away but something was better than nothing. 

It was odd for your dog to wake to pee. It only happened when he was a pup and that was long ago. 

You follow him as he races down the steps, trying your best to be quiet so as not to wake your family. The dog is energetic, scratching at the main door. 

You ‘sh’ him as you open it. You’re greeted by a wave of freezing air.  

The dog ruined your plans of staying on the porch as he disappeared into the darkness forcing you to follow down. 

The cold grass sinks into your feet, the moisture soaking your soles. You could barely see your dog in the dark with his black fur. Only the sound of him peeing told you he was still there. 

You stretch as you wait, looking up at the night sky. Slowly rolling your head in a circle. In doing so, you could see a small flame in the distance. A candle still going just outside of your father's shed.

You go to blow it out before it catches anything on fire. Another odd occurrence. Your father rarely lit candles due to their cost. He was sure to blow it out before he finished. Still he is old like your dog. They are both slipping from their good habits and you would need to learn to be more gracious. 

You bend down and with one quick blow, the flame is gone. Rising once more, you decide it is time to return to bed and go to call your dog over. 

His name never gets off your lips. It’s sealed shut by a strong gloved hand pressed over your mouth, and the feeling of a cool barrel of a gun pressed into the side of your head. 

“Sh, sh, sh, be quiet”. 

Your gut dropped, you knew the smooth voice of Billy. With faith he wouldn’t hurt you, you try screaming into his hand. He shook you a bit but no harsh hand was used to silence you. 

“I said quiet”. 

You do. You once heard that he shot a man off his horse a mile away. Now with a gun pressed into your head you didn’t need too much persuading to do as he said. 

“We’re going on a little trip, you and I” he whispers in your ear. 

Where was your dog? You wondered. Why couldn’t he sense you were in danger and come save you. You were no match for Billy. 

“Okay?” he asks.  You nod in response. 

“Okay, move”. He keeps his hand across your mouth, and his gun buried in your back, using it to move you forward. 

It’s not too far before the sight of his horse is seen only thirty feet from your house. He releases you and halters his gun so he could cup his hands to help you onto the saddle. 

You look back at your house, not too far in the distance. If you ran could you make it? If you screamed could your family hear it?

“Come on, now. Don’t keep me waiting”. 

Deciding you couldn’t make it, you slot your foot into his hands, and he hoists you up to the saddle. He got up more easily, and with a swing of his leg he saddles up behind you, bringing the reins and his hands down upon your lap. 

“Where are we going?” You ask.

“It’s not far. Just some place I go to think”. 

The horse is ridden at a leisurely pace. The cold air attacks you, and you find yourself curling into Billy’s warmth. 

He doesn’t speak to you again but you could feel him trying his best to protect you from the cold wind. His body barricaded around you, trying to keep you warm. At one point when the wind blew especially hard, he planted his large warm hand over the side of your face and pressed the other side of your face into his chest.

With the amount of shock running through your body, you weren't sure if the ride was short like he promised. It felt like an entirety by his side. 

When you arrived at the camp, the fire was already going, and a tent was set up. 

He dismounts first and then reaches back up to help you down. 

“Why have you brought me here?”. You accept his help down, his horse wouldn’t go without him. 

“To talk. Some place where you can’t run away”.

His words should have carried more weight, but you knew they were said in a non-threatening manner. 

There was a log near the fire that you used as a seat while Billy remained across from you. 

“I’ve missed you these past few days. Been real lonely without you”. He kicks the dirt under his shoe and watches as it jumps from his force. 

“We were never friends, Billy”. 

Billy. The name seemed to have just fallen off your lips. 

The sound of his name gave him courage to look up at you.

“You’re right. You’re right. We skipped that stage”. 

His eyes go back down and he is silent once more. 

“Y/N, your daddy’s never going to approve of me”.

“No” you agree, “No, he’s not”. 

His eyes flick up back to yours, his stance hardens, his shoulders square and his eyes peer down at you.

“So. Where does that leave us?” he asks. 

A large gust of wind blows through the camp, straight through you. Your body hunches from the cold

“Are you cold?” he asks in a state of shock that he could ignore the obvious. He doesn’t wait for your response, gone into his tent before the question fully parted from his lips. 

He brings out a thick wool blanket, and wraps it around your shoulders before going back to his side of the fire.

He rubs his hand across the bottom of his face, his other hand positions on his hip. You wondered what he was thinking. Why he looked so worried when he was the one in the position of power? 

“Billy?” you asked softly. His eyes flicked from the ground up to you. “Billy, take me home”. 

“You know God told me that you were the woman for me’’.

“Did he?” you ask cautiously. 

“Years ago. I saw you in town, I said ‘God, if she’s the one make her drop her bracelet’. And you did”. 

He reaches into his vest pocket pulling out his pocket watch to show you the chain. He brought it over to you. In the light you could see that he had melted the gold of your bracelet to his small gold watch and fashioned it into his pocket watch that he carried daily. The ends of the bracelet were melded but the gold that was braided together looked identical to the bracelet you had lost.

 It was your bracelet. One you lost nearly three years ago. The clasp was broken, you shouldn’t have been wearing it but it was one of your favorites. 

“It’s just a coincidence. It doesn’t mean anything” you said. A broken bracelet was hardly uncommon for a woman who had little money to fix it. 

This seemed to anger him. His face scrunched up and his movement became rough and short. 

“Coincidence? Was it a coincidence tonight? I had a burning desire to see you and you just so happen to be outside waiting for me”.

“I wasn’t waiting for you”.

“Well something brought you outside to me. You don’t call that fate?”. 

“My dog”. Your eyes slowly weep as Billy the kid turns into Billy the outlaw. 

To run a group of outlaws. To kill men, and control a town, you knew he had to have a dark streak. No matter how well he hid it, there must be something lurking underneath to be able to exert the violence needed.

His hand flys to his forehead, rubbing it as if you were causing him a headache. 

“You ain't listening. Me and you. We’re connected. Meant to be”. 

“Okay” you agree. Unsure on what else to do. “Billy, I am really cold and would like to go home now”.

“Here” he comes closer to you, bending down and helping you to your feet. 

He picks up a lit lamp by the fire, and tries to lead you forward. 

“It’s warmer in the tent”.

Your heart jumps. Alone in a tent is the last place you want to be. 

Your arm jerks from his touch as you speak, “Take me home now”. 

His hands grip your arms too tight.

“Home? What if I gave you a new home? One where we could be together”.

The cold air no longer bothered you. Billy was the law. Whatever he did would be met with no consequences. 

“I’ve been thinking, if your daddy won’t approve no matter what. Maybe we shouldn’t ask him” he continued. 

You struggle against Billy. How quickly after all this time that his touch became hurtful.

“I need my father's blessing,” you state. 

“I was worried you would say that” he remarks. 

The force on your arms changed from holding you still to pushing you forward. 

“Billy get off” you shout. 

“You won’t listen to reason” he retaliates. 

The door of the tent wasn’t tied so you were easily pushed through the fabric. You fall onto the laid mattress with no strength to raise yourself while Billy does ties up the door to keep the cold air out.

“Billy” you cry. 

He lays down next to you, wrapping his arm around your back and up your neck. 

“Everything is fine. I’ll take care of you”.

“Billy, don’t do this,” you pleaded. 

“If I can’t make you see my love, I can make you feel it”. 

He rises to rid himself of his suspenders. You sit up on your legs in front of you, with no harsh hand pushing you back down.

You capture his head between your hands, only talking when there was no attempt to shake you off. 

“Billy, think about what this will mean for me”. 

His eyes feel cold as they graze upon you, “I am thinking about you. About us. He can’t deny the marriage if what is done is done”. 

Feeling his head push forward under your hold, you go to make one last plea before his lips meet yours. 

“Bil-”. His kiss is hard and possessive. 

His body soon follows, and the weight of him presses you to the floor. 

Shoving at his shoulders doesn’t do much to deter him. After a handful of hard kisses, he changes positions, straddling your waist so he could sit up and unbutton his shirt. 

His movements are quick and rugged like having to get rid of the clothes was an annoying chore. 

Despite his dangerous line of work, and the odds, his body is free from scars and bullet holes. His tone chest and strong shoulders flex as he moves to throw the shirt to the corner of the tent. 

You’re memorized by his beauty until his hands reach for his belt. Your hands spring up to stop him, only this does he resist. 

“It’s alright. It ain’t going to hurt” he places a hand on your chest to keep you down while he undid his holster’s belt buckle, “I told you I would never hurt you”.

With the leather belt free, he slides the gun in the holster up along the ground. 

The button of his pants only takes a twist of his wrist and he is left in his underwear on top of you. 

“Get off” you yell at him but he continues by dragging you up to where the pillows are laid. 

He positions one of the pillows directly under your head for your comfort as you kick, your head rises and falls into it. 

His hand loosening the front tie of your nightgown stills the fight you had. 

“Billy, wait” you request. 

“I have waited. Nearly three years”. The nightgown is pushed off from your shoulders, and pulled down the rest of your body. 

The shake of your body is attributed to many things, the cold air that swarmed you, the shame and fear of it all, the fact that it was your first time being bare to a man. Billy took it to mean the cold and adjusted the blankets so they were pressed up against the sides of your body. 

The hand on your chest left as you stopped moving and both hands were moved to unbutton your underpants. 

“I’ll take care of you. Don’t worry’’. 

He leans down to kiss you again as a distraction to get between your legs. He is there before you know it.

He brings his fingers up to his mouth, sucking on them. You wondered what he was doing before he brought them down to your sex. 

You try to tell him to stop but your brain couldn’t muster it. Only a gasp escapes your lips as you feel him enter you. 

Its uncomfortable at first and you squirm away from him

“Stay still. It’ll get better” he promises. 

In an attempt to aid the friction, he leans his head down, spitting into cunt.

The extra moisture does help your arousal. Soon you are wet enough for his fingers to sink into you. 

He takes them out, not wanting you to finish too early, and brings his fingers to his lips to suck off the moisture. 

His hand comes down next to your head as lifts himself up to take off his underwear. 

“Is it going to hurt?” you ask. There was no point in begging. You had reached the point of no return. 

“Maybe. For a little bit, but it will feel good too. I promise”. 

He lines himself up with you, and with a final kiss he plunges himself into you. 

It feels as if he hits a wall inside of you. You were certain it was as far as he could go but his hips hammered into you determined to break through. 

You were about to tell him that you had taken as much of him as you could take when he does break the wall. It was a searing pain as if he had cut you. You let out a tisk of pain, reaching up and clawing at the back of his neck with the hand that wasn’t intertwined with Billys’. 

‘Sorry. Sorry. I know” he says, but the rhythm of his hips remains the same. 

The pain subsided after a couple of thrusts that felt terribly uncomfortable and sore. It was replaced with the pleasure he promised you that built in your stomach, and tingles between your legs. 

Still, this was not how it was supposed to go. Not in a tent in the middle of the night. Not outside of marriage and not without your father permission.

You throw your head up from a particularly hard thrust, and notice his gun still in the holster just beyond your fingertips. Your head was too scattered to form any thoughts. Otherwise, you never would have reached for it. Even if Billy had been a stranger from the saloon, you could never kill a man. 

You had no intention of killing him. You had just wanted to touch it. The gun of Billy-the-kid. 

“What? What do you want my gun for?” As he leans up to reach for it and you feel his cock push up into your stomach. 

He brings it out of his holster with the barrel pointed at your head, but his finger is far from the trigger. 

“Don’t you know a man’s gun is part of him? You should ask a man before you touch it”.

The gun pushes further and down to your lips. Billy’s eyes were dark. The awkward boy that used to court you was buried in the furthest part of him.

“Open your mouth” he commands. 

With the taste of metal at your teeth, you do part your lips enough for the tip of the gun. A struggle could lead to an accidental misfire. 

His thrusts in time with the movement of the gun. His eyes focus on your lips, the way they curl around his barrel. 

The metallic taste overwhelmed your tongue and your nose. It felt as if you could still taste the smoke on it. You are slow in your movements so not to startle him as you pull your head back.  

His stomach flutters and he loses his composure as you do.  

“Fuck” he sputters, his eyes close and he picks up pace, “That was hot”. 

You shake your head, pushing the hand that held the gun away from you. 

He drops his wrist down from your face, and slides the gun back over to his holster in the corner. 

“It’s gone. It’s alright, it’s gone”. 

The hand is repurposed against the side of your face, and his rhythmic pace is returned. 

“I wouldn’t hurt you” he tells you once more. 

“You’re hurting me now” you groan. 

His face scrunches up, and his thrusts come to rest.

“No,” he says, offended. 

“No. That aint what I am doing”. 

His hands on the back of your shoulders lift you up against his chest, as he hoists your bodies together into an upright position. 

Your hands grip on top of his shoulders, and you rest your forehead against his collarbone from the pressure of him inside of you as you sit on his lap. 

“Look at me” he orders, but your position suited you just fine. 

You rock your head against his shoulder blade in response, which satisfied him. 

“The only way I would hurt you now is by leaving you. No man but those desperate or widowed would have you after I am done. Your family would never recover their name. Now I’ve made it clear that we are to get married, so no hurting is being done”. 

His fingers dig into your hips so hard that there was sure to be bruises littering the skin tomorrow. 

“Ain’t no sin for a husband and wife to become one”.

“We are not married,” you remind him. 

“What’s marriage but a commitment to God to have and to hold the other? I’ve made that commitment. You have too. I know you have. If it wasn’t for your daddy we’d be married a long time ago”.

“Billy” you groan. The lack of movement frustrated you. He had started an itch that now needed to be scratched. 

To ease your discomfort, he brought his hand down between your bodies and began to gently swirl his finger around your pearl. 

“I built you a house, you know. Told myself I couldn’t touch you until I drove the final nail in, and the day I do, you appear at the market a day earlier than you usually would. We’re connected. Every bad thing has led me here to you”.

Your nails dig into his flesh as the pressure builds in knots within your stomach. 

A frustrated sound makes its way from your throat when he suddenly stops, moving his hands around the back of your neck and around your waist so he could lay you down and finish. 

His pace is faster and harder. It cuts off his ability to talk any longer. Only groan and grunt. 

As you tighten around him and pulse as you come, it invites him to join you.

As soon as he is off you, you turn to your side away from him. What would happen now? Would Billy leave you here? Would he kick you out into the forest? You worried that he spoke of marriage out of lust that had now been fulfilled. 

He seemed content with your presence, as he reached out to gently scratch the back of your neck. 

You can hear animals outside the tent as they scurry around.  Billy regains his stamina beside you and the silence between you both stretches into the night. 

You focus on the sounds of the frogs and crickets as they perform in perfect harmony. The sounds and sex lull you to a tired state, but Billy wasn’t through with the night. 

With a small kiss to the back of your neck, he was pushing back on your shoulder to lay you flat again. 

“No” you protest, too tired for much more than a simple plea, “Not again”. 

It was late. Possibility early morning. Your body wanted nothing more than to shut down, now that the adrenaline has faded. 

“Yes. again. We gotta make sure we put a baby in you”, he states, positioning his body once again over yours. 

—--

You woke up alone in the tent. Two blankets were laid on top of you keeping off the cold, but the dull ache between your legs told you to get up and go back home. You found your clothes on the floor, noticing that Billy had taken all his.

The sight of Billy eating on a log relieves you as you exit the tent. You had no way of getting home without him. 

He gets up from his seat as he sees you push back the fabric of the tent. 

“Good morning” he greets, “How are you feeling?”

“I want to go home. Now”, you demand. 

He looked like a spoiled child getting told off by a parent. His head lowers, and he clasps his hands together in front of himself. 

“Yeah. We should be getting back” he agrees. 

His head rises again and he beckons your forward with his hand.

“You need to eat something before we do. I made porridge”. 

You take his place on the log in front of the fire and his jacket. Without a word, he takes his warm jacket off himself and helps you put it on. 

A bowl of warm porridge is placed in your hands, and then he leaves you be. Giving you space to process your emotions. 

He packs up the tent and gear while you sit, unable to eat what was given to you.

Even in all the time it took him to pack away the tent and all the camping equipment, you had yet to take a single bite.

You watch as Billy kicks dirt into the fire, smothering your warmth.  

The bowl is gently taken from your hands where Billy flicks the food away, and rinses it with his water bottle before packing it away.

You follow him to the horse and he helps you up on the saddle the same way as the night before. 

The swing of your leg as you try to hook it over the saddle is executing. 

You shout from the pain, feeling the mussels as they pull to extend your leg.

“Easy” he soothes, helping you back steady on your feet. 

You shove him off. It was his fault. Your body was in pain and your life was over because of him.

He stubbles back from the sudden shove but he comes back without reproach. 

“Here” he says. 

He swings up to the saddle, leaning his body down to pull you up. You sit across the horse’s saddle, legs together to ease the pain.

Billy rides slowly for you. The day was sunny but a chill still hung in the air. You wondered how Billy went on without his jacket. 

The ride took you through trees and along a stream of water. It was not far from your home but you had never been there.

With a twenty minute ride your home came into view. While distant you could see your family as they gathered on the porch. 

The galloping of the hoofs stopped their discussion with a loud relief. 

“She’s here!” your sister yelled back into the house, “She’s back”.

Your father runs outside to the porch watching with hard eyes as you and Billy ride. 

Billy halts his horse a meter away and slides you down the saddle onto the ground. He is quick to get off behind you, holding your reluctant hand in his. 

You saw your father disappear into the house as you crossed the distance. He wasn’t a fool. He knew what Billy had done. The shame must have been too overbearing for him. 

The rest of your family were all still in their robes as they stood on the path waiting for you to come near. Your mother held out her arms but Billy stopped ten feet away under the shade of the large oak tree. 

“Ma’am” he greets your mother, “I am sorry for the distress I have caused your family, but as you can see she was safe with me”. 

The stickiness between your thighs became apparent as he spoke the words. 

You tug your hand back but he keeps it in his tight hold. 

The front door is kicked open and your father appears holding out his shotgun. 

Billy is quick to act, pulling you back behind him but he doesn’t draw his gun. 

“You get off my land” your father demands. 

Billy nods, “I will. We just came to collect a couple of things”. 

Your breath hitched in your throat. Your father was not a very good shot. He was old and aim was crooked. Billy was a far better shot. He wouldn’t miss. 

“Ain’t no we, boy. You get your filthy hands off my daughter, and you get out of town, or I'll kill you”.

Your mother growls her husband's name as she moves the rest of her children to the side. Only your father was under the illusion that he could take Billy on and live. 

“Now I plan to do right by her” Billy states with authority, “I’ll marry her”.

“The hell you will” your father roared. 

“It doesn’t have to end like this. You could live. See your daughters married with children. Die of old age like God intended”. 

“Draw” your father commands. To kill an unarmed man was murder, but your father was worried about the courts and not the Regulators who were sure to come seeking vengeance. 

You latch onto Billy's arm to stop him drawing his gun, or at least delay his aim so your father could have a chance. 

“You won’t mind if I get your daughter out from under me, now?” Billy asks, “Your aim has been off since you first pointed the gun at me. You could hit her instead”. 

With the agreeance of your father, Billy brings you back from behind him with a tight hold on your arm. 

“Go to the tree” Billy nods in its direction but you could hear your father calling for you to come to him. 

As soon as he releases you, the direction you go is not to the tree but to your family. 

You arm is caught and shoved to the right,

 ‘I said the tree” Billy reiterates. 

You follow his command this time, hugging yourself to the large oak tree. 

Billy takes his gun but holds his hands outwards in a surrendered position. 

“Just let me show you something” The crowd follows Billy’s eyes over to the work yard,  “You see that paint tin over there?”

A small paint tin rested on the lank of wood that was going to become the new fence. If you weren’t looking for it you would hardly see it from the distance. 

“What about it?” your father asks. The gun is unstable in his hands. It slightly bopped as he pointed it.  He was scared, and you wished you could do something that would deescalate the situation. 

“Just watch”. Billy turns to the tins direction and aims his gun with a steady hold. 

The first bullet sprayed the white paint as it went flying in the air. The second bullet hit it before it landed, flinging it further away and higher from the force. The third bullet shot it down with a hole in the center.

“Now we can continue if you want, and I can take her away without a father, or we can be joined together by marriage. That means no taxes”. 

Your father contemplates his options. He wanted to kill Billy, you could see that plain on his face, but could he?. 

The answer was no. The gun was lowered and your mother let out a sigh of relief. 

Billy beckons you back over, taking your arm back in his grip once you get close enough. 

“Pack your things, and get changed” he commands, “If you think about holding up in there, I’ll bring Jesse back and we’ll burn the house down”. 

You nod spitefully. His eyes looked over you once before turning back to the house. 

“Go” he orders, letting you go. 

Your family is quick to squabble around you as you trek into the house. There were too many words flown at you.Too many hands touching you as you moved. 

Only your father stayed away, Slumping into a foyer chair with his gun still in his hand. 

You were determined to do your tasks quickly and lead Billy away. The ache between your legs was ignored as you fling open your wardrobe and shove what you can into your travel case. It filled quickly, you only had two more dresses in your wardrobe but you left them favoring to take your make-up and hair accessories. 

It hardly zips, and lands on the ground with a heavy thud. 

You weren’t sure how long it had taken you, but the less time keeping Billy waiting the better. You grab one of the last dresses you owed out of your wardrobe, side stepping people as they went to hold you. 

“Help me with my dress” you call on your sister. 

“You aren’t honestly leaving with him?” your mother took a seat on your bed as if you had punched her. 

Stepping into the green dress and waiting to be laced up, gave them the answer that they ignored. 

“Billy is the law,” you remind them. 

Your sister silently agreed by stepping forwarding and lacing you into your dress. You put Billy’s coat back on to show him you still had it, and take the time to hug and kiss them all. Billy was not the kind to keep you from your family but it would be the last time you would see them as their daughter and sister. 

Your father was still sitting in the chair as you came down. He doesn't move as you bend down and kiss his forehead. 

Billy was waiting outside, his gun resting on his thigh was holsted once more in his belt so he had hands to take your bag. 

He straps it to his horse in no time, turning to wait for you. 

You took one more look back at your family on the porch before you were ready. 

You raise your arms up to Billy on the horse and he pulls you up to the saddle once more. 

The ride to the Regulators camp was silent and quite a distance. Billy had taken his hat off as the sun went higher in the sky, and placed it upon your head. 

It felt strange to wear Billy’s coat and hat. Less than 24 hours ago he was little more than a stranger. Now he was your self-proclaimed fiance. You could very well be carrying his child. It all happened so fast. Your head spun trying to piece together the facts.

The noise of the Regulators as Billy’s horse approached did not help your scrambled mind. They whooped and hollered. 

You could hear Billy’s smile as he greeted them but his horse never slowed. Moving past the building where the men sat drinking, to the furthest field where a wooden house stood tall. 

Across from the house was a horse corral where they trained the horses. In between your house and the first house of one of the Regulators was the stable where the horses were housed. 

In addition to the tax, you assumed the men also traded horses to earn a wage. 

It was a decent size of land and well kept. The house in front of you looked strong. It was two stories of wooden panels, and a large porch was wrapped around the entire estate. If you were to take Billy at his word, it must have taken him a long time to complete such a house.

He stops the horse in front of the house, swinging off first to tie the reins to the railings of the porch. 

He assures you that he will take your things inside when he comes back out to tend to his horse, but he was eager for you to see your new home. 

With help down, Billy leads you into the house. It was furnished. Nothing decorative but tables and chairs. The entertaining lounge had a large fireplace, and the kitchen had a large stove and a large window above the sink that pointed out to a field of flowers. 

It grew a distaste in your mouth. He had designed this home with you in mind. He always knew this day was coming and expected you to swallow the news joyfully and quickly. 

‘And this” he opens a door just beside the living room to show a smaller version. A dark red armchair and matching leg rest faced a small fireplace. An arched window that Billy had built in a reading nook and decorated with mismatched pillows, provided light into the room. 

“This is your room for when you need your space. I won’t step foot into it”. He looks at you expecting you to be overjoyed but finds you glaring back at him. 

“Do you like it?” he asks. 

‘I have your cum dried between my legs, and you are asking me if I care about a room?” you bit. 

He closes the door quickly and takes you by the arm to lead you up stairs, 

“I’ll get you hot water for your bath”. 

Billy boils the water over the stove as you sit in the chair and wait. A hip bath was placed against the wall in the kitchen. You go and expect it. Your family was too poor for one. A basin did the job fine. But you always wanted one. 

He doesn’t let the water get too hot, only luke warm before joining you. 

“Do you mind if I stay?” he questions as he gently places the water and rag cloths on the floor by your foot.

You don’t look at him as you talk. Your fingers reach for the laces of your dress but they touch his as he unlaces the dress for you. 

“What does it matter? The sin has already been committed”.

Your dress falls to the floor around you. You’re quick to leave your undergarments alongside it so you could climb into the tub. 

“You need to know I won’t ever do that again”. He squats next to you in the tub, bringing the warm rags up to your skin. You take one and focus on scrubbing the seaman off your thighs while he focuses on your shoulders and neck. 

“I’ll take care of you. Respect you like a good husband should. I won-”. 

“Your words mean nothing to me” you cut him off. 

He shifts as you lean back into the tub.

‘I’ll prove it to you”, he resolves. 

—-

The wedding was small with only your family and the Regulators in attendance. The priest married you quickly and you were placed on Billy’s saddle once more. No big party predeceased it. Your family went home, and the Regulators went back to their camp where bottles were opened. 

You could hear the Regulators as they used your marriage as an excuse to play from the comfort of the house Billy built you. 

He remained with you despite the protests from his gang. 

He remained quiet as you figured out the swell of emotions inside you. Anger. Sadness. Confusion. A quiet relief lingered in the back only causing more distress.  

When he bought you the dinner he had made for you an emotion finally stuck. 

Acceptance. 

William. H Bonney was your husband now. 

He kept true to his words. Patiently waiting for your permission. You slept next to him every night, but besides a gentle kiss goodnight, he never touched you. His patience granted him two willfully-born sons. 

He was a good husband and father. 

You and your children were never left without. 

You watch him from the window as he shows the boys how to ride. They were too small for the lesson to be anything more than a pony ride but it gave you time to put dinner on the table without them under your feet. 

He winks at you when he catches you staring. Unconsciously your hand goes to your belly. 

‘A little girl would be nice’, you think.

[wei-otter]

Never Forgotten //Vader x F!Reader / Ch 1

(A/N, hiii! I’ve never written before but the awesome @dokoni-mo and other anons on the page encouraged me to give it a shot. sorry abt grammar lollll i was better at science than english. i honestly have no idea what i’m doing loll, but all i know is i love vader and i love the community on here! thank you guys for being here!)

You and Anakin grew up together on Tatooine. Once the time came, he continued on to become a jedi knight while you became a medic. Years later you are once again reunited, only he is no longer the boy you knew on Tatooine. He is now Darth Vader, feared with lord. Was this a cruel trick of time? or was it your destiny all along.

Warnings: slavery, mentions of broken bones, terrible punctuation

_________________________________________

The bright suns adorning Tatooine’s warm sky served as your morning alarm. With a yawn you got up and got ready to head to the junkyard to assist your “employer” Watto. You grabbed your small backpack full of bandages and other first aid equipment, usually there would be some incident where someone would need patching up and you were the only one who seemed to actively care. You didn’t really know how you ended up on Tatooine, orphaned, and working for a low life junk dealer. What you did know was the only thing keeping you going were the Skywalkers, Watto’s slaves.

You arrived at Watto’s depot and surveyed the area for your Watto’s youngest slave, Anakin. Searching around the sand covered scraps you finally found him crouched over, collecting bolts in a small sack. Quietly creeping up on him you pounced onto his back.

“Ahhh” he shouted

“Hey Ani! What’s up?” You asked

“The suns, duh” he retorted

Rolling your eyes you told him that’s not what you meant. He responded with a small smirk.

“Where’s Watto?” You asked

“Out, I guess, I think he went to make a trade the next town over”

Nodding, thank the stars, Watto made you feel as if you needed to take a bath every time you ran into him, but he was the only one interested in a “free child” when you were found. Most wondered why he didn’t just make you a slave, but in his own weird way he felt bad for you (odd coming from him). So he allowed you a room in his junk yard and the title of “service apprentice”, though in reality you were just a glorified slave.

Tugging on your arm, Anakin pulled you out of your thoughts.

“Come on, lets go back to my house, I wanna fix up my droid”

Upon arriving at Mos Espa’s slave quarters, you saw Shmi, Anakin’s mother, cleaning machinery outside of their house.

“ Mom! I found the rest of the parts!” Ani exclaimed

Shmi turned with a smile, “That’s wonderful darling! I see you brought back someone else too! How are you today F/N?”

“I’m doing great since Watto’s gone”

She bent down to your height and winked “me too”

She walked inside and you smiled, turning to follow Anakin. Abruptly you were stopped by a child’s cry. Though you were only a child yourself, you felt the obligation to help everyone. You ran over to a girl, only a few years younger than you and held her cheek.

“What happened?”

Through her sobs she managed to say she tumbled over something on the stairs. She told you her parents were with their master so she was all alone.

“Ok, it looks like you may have broken your ankle, I need to look at it, to see for sure. This might hurt, so just hold onto me, ok?”

She nodded with tears in her eyes. Slowly you lifted her pant leg, she flinched and tightened her grip on you. Getting a better look at the leg of saw it was in fact broken, and there was a large scrape on her small knee. Sighing, you took out some bandages and ointment from your bag. You dabbed at the scrape and placed the healing ointment on it. As for the leg, you looked around and found a small stick that you created a makeshift brace with. After wrapping her leg you gave her something to numb the pain.

“It’s gonna be ok, your mommy will be back soon, alright?”

You placed her on your back and brought her into the Skywalker’s house. Shmi noticed the other child and rushed over to you.

“What happened?!”

You handed the toddler over to her and explained, she thanked you for looking out for the kid.

“ Thank you F/N, You are so responsible, I just know you will do great things”

You smiled and walked outside to locate your friend. Abruptly Anakin grabbed your hand, your eyes widened as he was almost nose to nose with you.

“Come on, I want you to be the first to see R2!”

He wanted to show you?

First?

You blushed a bit and squeaked out an “ok”. Roundish the corner you saw the can shaped droid and smiled. Ani really was a talented mechanic.

“F/N this is R2! And R2 this is my best friend F/N”

R2 blinked and beeped at you, laughing as you waved back.

“Wow Ani! This is awesome! You’re so smart!”

He smiled, “thanks F/N, but I’m not the one healing people, that’s all you.”

He noticed.

__________________________________________

Later that evening the suns were beginning to set and Watto was back. He, Shmi, Anakin, and you were in the corridor of Watto’s shop. Shmi cleaned the new trade he brought back, Anakin organized some inventory, you made Watto’s food, while Watto watched you three work.

“Ouch!” Anakin cut himself on a jagged scrap. Before his mother could even turn and react, you were by his side taking care to disinfect it.

Shmi watched tenderly at the scene before her, in her heart she wished for you two to stay by each other's side.

“Look at you two, I can already hear the wedding bells”

You and Anakin looked up at her

“Ewww, gross mom”

You laughed along but deep down you wanted her implication to come true. From his chair Watto let out a wheezy laugh, drinking from his bowl

“If those two get married they better stay working for me. We’ve got a mechanic and a medic, one who can cook at that, heh”

The three of you awkwardly laughed along. Continuing with your respective tasks you couldn’t help but feel down at Anakin’s response, “eww”? You felt your heart sink as you played that over and over.

Little did you know he was replaying your laugh in his head.

“I was gonna just agree, but she laughed at the idea. I guess I was wrong about her feelings…”

He decided not to dwell on the interaction. At least you were still here with him, even if not in that way.

Weeks later some strangers walked into the junkyard two men in odd robes and one girl, looking only a few years older than you. You were going to greet Anakin as he walked in, but he didn't see you. Instead he shifted his focus on the other girl.

“Are you an angel?”

Your heart fell.

“what?” She asked

“An angel, I heard the deep space pilots talk of them. They are the most beautiful creatures in the universe”

You felt like crying, you were there when he overheard the pilots, you discussed what angels would look like with him. What hurt more was that she did, she did look like one. How could you ever compare? __________________________________________

The men, known as Jedi, finally left with the girl, “Padme”. You felt as if a weight had been lifted off of your chest. You had Ani back, though he was different. He had a new passion about him. He had a purpose.

He explained to you that he would become a Jedi. He was the chosen one.

After the first few weeks he stopped bringing up that girl, much to your delight. You two became Ani and F/N again.

For the years leading up to Anakin’s departure to Coruscant you two became closer than ever, basically glued to each other's side. And with your growing bond, your feelings grew too. You loved Anakin. How could you not? You wished endlessly for some way to follow him down the path of the jedi, but you simply could not. Not only was your life set down a different path, Anakin would not allow you to follow him.

“This life is a dangerous one. I don’t think I would be able to bear it if something happened to you.”

He never outright said it, but you hoped this was his way of telling you he loved you. You were deeply saddened because you knew the ways of the Jedi from Ani’s explanations. There was no room for love or attachments in that world. Plus you figured you two would not see each other for many years once you went to study medicine and he went to train.

__________________________________________

Once the faithful day arrived you woke up bright and early to see Anakin off. You were there with R2, C-3PO, Shmi, and his new master, Obi-Wan Kenobi. He hugged his mother and said bye to his droids then came to you.

“Hey, don’t be sad F/N, we will meet again, I’ll make sure of it. And in the future I won't just be some boy from Tatooine. I will be Anakin Skywalker, the chosen Jedi knight, i'll be somebody.”

You clenched your jaw trying to keep your tears in. Looking into his eyes you jumped into his embrace.

“You already are somebody Ani”

You could feel him smile. You wanted to finally tell him your true feelings, but were stopped by an unknown force. You met Obi-Wan’s gaze, he looked at you as if to scold you. He saw how you two were, he saw your bond, he now needed you to let Anakin go. You closed your eyes and held him tighter. You finally let go and couldn’t help the tears streaming down your face. Anakin softly brushed away your tears and Shmi came over to hold your hand as she kissed her son’s head. Anakin pulled away and gave one last look before turning to board the ship.

You felt an intense feeling of dread. Deep down you knew this was the last time you would see your Anakin Skywalker.

Their ship took off and right away you turned on your heels and began your own departure. You were off to study methods of medicine throughout different systems. Anakin was not the only one with a big future and big obligations. You may not have lived with your loved ones as a child, but you wanted to do all in your power to make sure others could have a chance with theirs.

You were closing your bag when Shmi came over to you, she laid a loving hand on your shoulder

“I’m so proud of you. You and Anakin both have brought me so much joy I cannot begin to explain. My son will be protecting others and you will be healing them.”

Already emotional you melted into her arms. She brushed your hair with her worn hands.

“I know he never said it, but a mother always knows. He loved you too.”

****

(A/N, thank you guys sm for reading!! don’t worry there will be actual vader in the next one!!)

taglist: @dokoni-mo, @wizardofrozz, @guinea-pig16 @the-official-memester

[marvelandimagine]

Team Spirit

Pairing: Eddie Munson x soccer captain! reader

Summary: Eddie shows how proud he is of you on game day. Tooth-rotting fluff.

Word count: 960

A/N: I have 700 headcanons about Eddie with a soccer prodigy gf (obvi has nothing to do with the fact that I played through my sophomore year of college) but let's be real I will probably only ever document like 3 lollll but here's one of 'em!!

--

You’re grabbing books out of your locker before first period and chatting with your boyfriend, who’s leaning on his side against the locker next to yours. Even with your gaze fixed in front of you, you can feel the intense warmth of his stare, the rapt adoration that glows in those big brown eyes of his.

God bless Mrs. McCarthy for putting you together as chem lab partners at the start of the year. Who knew that the introduction would lead to you both falling head over heels?

You're just about to shut the locker door when a ring-covered hand darts across you and stops it from closing.

“Do you have the other one with you?” Eddie asks, his free hand tugging at the sleeve of your uniform top.

"What, my other jersey?" you ask, confused.

Eddie nods and you tilt your head toward your gym bag.

"Yeah, I always have both on me in case I forget where the hell we’re playing."

“Excellent. Give it here,” Eddie commands, extending his hand.

“Why?”

Eddie ignores the question and immediately starts bouncing between his feet, opening and closing his fist.

“Gimmegimmegimmegimme!”

You roll your eyes at his standard dramatic antics, rummaging through your soccer bag and extracting your away jersey.

“Relax, relax, here!”

“Thanks, baby,” he says happily, uncrumpling it to examine its full length in front of him. Before you can even ask what he's doing, he’s yanked his Metallica t-shirt off, flung it at your face, and is now shrugging your jersey over his bare torso.

He tugs the fabric down, a snug fit that leaves just a hint of exposed skin right above the waistline of his dark jeans. Eddie fixes you with a wide grin.

“Soooo, how do I look?” he asks, twirling one curly lock between his fingers before his intentional doe-eyed expression morphs into an exagerrated growl as he flexes.

You giggle, utterly bemused.

“Did someone wake and bake this morning?”

Eddie abruptly stops his theatrical display, sliding one hand to your hip as the other tucks some stray hair behind your ear.

“No no no!" He’s all dimples as he beams at you. "Girls do this when their boyfriends have big games, right? 'Course I’m gonna do the same for you, gorgeous.”

“Seriously?! You’re adorable,” you reply, bringing your lips against his with a happy hum. You pull back and Eddie’s hands wrap around your waist, not wanting to let you go just yet.

“Who’d have thought, Eddie Munson participating in a conformist high school tradition,” you say, a mischievous grin on your face. “You must really like me.”

Eddie makes a concerned face.

“Oh, have I not made that obvious enough? My most sincere apologies.” You catch just a flash of a wolfish smirk before his mouth is on yours again, needy and claiming. His hands slide up from your waist to frame your face, and when you pull apart, you’re still left with butterflies. The starry look in his eyes tells you he feels the same.

“I do have to be completely straight with you though, princess, while I’m primarily doing this because you’re my favorite person on this planet, I also can’t wait to see the horrified looks on all the teachers' faces when they realize you voluntarily gave me this to wear and I didn’t steal it."

He rubs his hands together gleefully. "Especially Evans, God has she hated me ever since I spoiled everyone's reading of To Kill a Mockingbird by telling them how Bob Ewell bit the bullet."

You shake your head with a smile. “Why am I not surprised?" The bell rings and you give Eddie one last kiss before heading off in opposite directions. You glance over your shoulder, smiling at seeing your lucky number on his back, and smirk as you suddenly hear Eddie’s raised tones:

"Why YES, Mr. Brady, my all-star soccer queen of a girlfriend, Y/F/N Y/L/N, gave me the honor of wearing her jersey today as she mentally readies herself to kick some serious ass."

You get some playful comments from your friends who’ve seen Eddie striding proudly through the halls in your jersey (“First matching jerseys, then matching rings!”), and when chem rolls around, Eddie tells you all about the sweet satisfaction he found when Mrs. Evans did in fact have her mind blown by the fact that you two were dating. But your science teacher Mrs. McCarthy was the opposite of what Eddie had experienced, giving you both an enthusiastic thumbs-up.

The day flies by and as you head to Spanish, you chuckle as you see heads swivel in confusion when you and Eddie walk down the hall together in your matching shirts, the Hellfire Club president’s arm slung over the soccer captain’s shoulder. Suddenly, Eddie stops and flags Fred Benson down from across the hall.

"Benson, Benson! My dude, can you snap a picture of me and my girl here?"

"Uh, sure," Fred replies, fumbling with his camera.

"Perfect!" Eddie claps and turns to you. "C'mere, sweetheart."

Your surprised laugh echoes down the hall as he scoops you up in his arms, bridal style. "Say 'ready for a merciless defeat of the enemy!!'"

"Ready for a merciless- shit!" You break off because you're laughing too hard -- the kind of effect Eddie always has on you. You gaze up at your boyfriend, still giggling, and the hopelessly smitten smile he's giving you has your heartbeat humming on overdrive.

That's the moment Benson captures, and the developed picture eventually moves from a spot on Eddie's wall to a frame on the bookshelf in your first apartment together. A memory that reminds you both that, no matter what happens, you're always on each other's team.

[iwanttobepersephone]

(Long post incoming)

So,,,, I used to be in an indie band. We never actually released a full song because the whole band fell apart before we got the change to do more than an acoustic album. The lead was named Judah, and he was a mess. He was 16 and getting high at Thanksgiving, then pretending he's this paragon of responsibility. I, the bassist, was the one holding the band together while he had a breakdown in the corner.

One day, I left the server for a couple of days or so. I was pissed at Judah and someone else because they were just being generally unreasonable and annoying, and I wanted to see if they'd notice and what would happen. I had a whole conversation about it before I left in a public chat that everyone could see

The next day, though, Judah texts me asking why I kicked him out of the band chat. Except, I wasn't in the server, so I couldn't have. He apparently hadn't realized I wasn't in the server anymore and was very upset as to why I didn't tell him. But,,, I shouldn't have needed to, because it was very public knowledge if he had just checked his damned messages. We ended up having a whole argument where I unloaded all of my thoughts about him. I knew with 100% certainty that I was right about everything I said, I wouldn't have said any of it if I hadn't. I was, admittedly, very rude about it, but that was because he had a history of letting good mannered criticism slide off his back and I knew that if he was going to change, he needed to get hurt first. I ended up blocking him and leaving the band for good after I had nothing else to say, and that was the end of it

Until today, 4 months later. His alt account, which I didn't block, texted me. He literally starts the conversation with "you were right about me"!! And I'm like, "Ok, I have the mental energy, might as well interact." And so I did. I literally spent an hour just telling this dude, in kinder yet still certain words, that only he can change himself, and he needs to want to in order for it to work. And he was listening this time! He wasn't wallowing in his own damn self-pity anymore. He was actually accepting criticism! He's gotten therapy, and he's actually, really, wanting to change! He, of course, has far to go, but I knew then, and I know now that he will get there. So, like, I am so glad I am getting to see the effects of my plan working, AND I'm realizing I'm like. The inciting incident in his redemption arc. Like, wow, this is such a strange feeling, lollll

I feel like I'm aiding a protagonist in his quest to stop being the villain and begin to become a hero

Do y'all wanna hear a story? Lol

[sukirichi]

earned it [02]

Gojo Satoru is a firm believer that if you work hard for it then you shall earn it. But on the other side, he’s not unfamiliar with his own sins. He also believes that there is punishment due for his sins as he’s earned it.

cw. mentions of murder, suggestive content, unedited fic

notes. err, i’m only doing this on impulse. i would like to continue it, but i think part one stands enough for itself :> i might delete this if i don’t like it a few days later lollll

series masterlist

Your infamous customer hadn’t arrived even as the restaurant closed. You watched close enough, fidgety in your movements and often bumping into other servers, all because your gaze kept darting back to the front door, awaiting his presence.

There’s no actual reason why you want to see him. Maybe it’s because he left an impression? The guy didn’t even budge after finding out someone had snuck into the kitchen to poison him, leaving you to wonder why anyone wanted to kill him. Not that it was any of your business, but you figured it was only common between powerful people who are equally greedy. Still, you’re unfocussed in your work, apologizing every now and then when your boss shook their head at you.

Thankfully, you managed to get back to your old pace. Thoughts of the white-haired tall man left the room at the same time everyone did, leaving only you and your boss in the locker room. You ended up working two shifts again on this weekend, your co-worker asking you to cover for them due to sudden family issues.

It’s tiring, that much is for sure, but you won’t complain when it’s more money down in your pocket. You’re dazzled, however, as you leave the locker room and see that your main chefs are still there.

Upon seeing you, they immediately usher you into a lone table, table 98 that remained untouched the whole night, a two lit candles illuminating the otherwise darkness of the isolated restaurant. Only this time, it’s occupied by him no less, his azure eyes flittering up to yours at the sound of your hesitant footsteps.

You’ve been looking for him the whole night, yet now that he’s in front of you, you don’t have any words to say. Instead, you bow down deep, the hands clasped in your lap shaking.

“S-Sir.”

“No need to be so nervous. I only wish to discuss something with you,” his laugh is so carefree, lighthearted as he gestures to the empty spot across him. “Take a seat,” Wordlessly, you foolow his orders and dash down to the seat, spine straight and head held high. There’s a hint of amusement in his small smile, but he doesn’t tease you, save for the lilting tone he held. “So you’re in sophomore year of university?”

“Yes, Sir. How’d you know?” You furrowed your brows, unsure of whether you’re supposed to expensive meal served in two.

Gosh, and this was on page three too, a single meal cost at least six months’ worth of rent.

“I pulled a string or two,” he lifts one shoulder lazily, waving his knife in the air. “And please, call me Satoru. Assuming we come to an understanding, things will go well for the both of us. You are in need of financial aid, yes?” You nod, utterly clueless in where this is leading, but Satoru’s already made up his mind long before he came here that he found no need in beating around the bush.

“Good. Then what do you say about being my sugar baby?”

“S-sugar baby?” you repeat the word first in confusion, then with distaste. He simply hums around the meat he’s eating, as if it’s a normal occurrence for him to inquire such things, and you scoff, crossing your arms on your chest.

You don’t care that this guy is your precious customer – he was just the same as everyone else.

“Is that the reason why you asked me to stay behind? Do you think you can just pay people to sleep with you? It may have worked on others, but not to me. I would rather keep my dignity than be with you,” you breathe hard after your rant, slapping your palms down on the table. The impact of it makes the table shake, his hand reflexively reaching to steady his wine glass. “As for what happened yesterday, you don’t have to thank me about it. I did what any right-minded person would.”

“And if I said I never wanted to be saved?” he asks, his tone still so calm that it further infuriates you. You stare at him, stunned and mouth gaping. “Sit down. I didn’t mean it that way.”

“Thank you for graciousness, Sir, but I really don’t—”

“Angel,” You freeze at the nickname. He chuckles with his forehead pressed to his clasped hands, “Do you really think I need to pay people to sleep with me? I could have anyone I want,” his voice falls an octave or two, the sonorous warning rumbling something…alien inside your body. You stand there, unable to move, and he easily sees through this as he hides a smirk behind his drink. “Sit down. I’m not done talking to you.”

You don’t know what snapped in you to actually follow, but his words weren’t just that. They were always laced with eased dominance, the words leaving his lips coming out as a command. No, it was more like a hypnotizing order, and you’re nothing but a puppet enslaved by it.

His smile only grows bigger, and you hate that he looks ridiculously handsome under the dim lights of the room. Life would’ve been much easier if this man had been ugly.

“As I was saying, this relationship should be casual, no strings attached. I’d prefer if you’re exclusive to me, and in return, I’ll cover all your school fees and everything else. As for the sex,” he cuts his eyes straight to yours, an intense burning heat in them. You squirm in your seat, a little intimidated, albeit excited, by this proposition too, though you’d rather die than let him know that, “I don’t need that from you. I just want someone to talk to.”

“You’re paying me to talk to you?”

“No,” he chuckles, “I’m saying you form a relationship with me in exchange of financial aid. You’d be similar to a lover, nothing less of a friend,” he stares at his drink so hard like he was having a debate with it. A few seconds later, he found his answer, the gleam in his eyes surreptitious as he says, “Someone I can trust.”

You huff. Surely it wasn’t easy as that. “Why me?”

“No reason,” he shrugged, “I just find you endearing, that is all,” You lean back on your seat, trying to process all this. The hesitance must be written all over your face because he adjusts his tie, sliding a white business card your way before sliding his chair back in. At least he’s well-mannered enough to do that. “You can take your time to think about it. There’s no need to rush.”

Somehow, seeing his figure retreat triggers something within you. You watch as silhouettes emerge from the darkness trail after him; must be his security team, serving as an additional note that what you so struggled to achieve was likely nothing for him.

Was it fear? Desperation? Shame?

You don’t know, you won’t ever really know, but you run up to him anyway, brave enough to tug at his sleeve. The guards surrounding him tense up at the contact, stepping away only when he raises a finger that spoke a thousand words.

“You-you’ll pay for everything?”

With his back turned to you, you failed to see that victorious grin he wore. “And everything more,” he reassured. He turns around to confirm your submission, but you’re quivering under his towering frame, poor hands clutched around the card so tightly he won’t be surprised if you break it. He chuckles, coaxing the worries out of you as he caresses your cheek, his breath evident of expensive liquor hitting your cheeks. “Relax, angel. It’s not like you’re selling your soul to the devil.”

Your pupils blow wide at the close proximity. If he was attractive before, it’s nothing compared to the clarity of his sharp, angular features that are softened by his playful smile. Oddly enough, his thumb caressing your cheeks is tender yet calloused.

There’s no telling when who put who under a spell, because you’re clutching helplessly at his suit jacket, whispering, “Am I not?”

You are, he wants to say, but you’re so innocent, so vulnerable – such an angel, he can’t help but hum in his head – that he doesn’t have the heart to let you know. He already knew things were bound to fall out of place one another, but until that hasn’t happened yet, he’ll have to keep you close. He’ll make you his.

“I’ll take good care of you,” he declares so confidently that you couldn’t even question his capability to do so you, and for a moment, just a moment, your knees weaken under his stare. “Now that, I can promise.”

Should you have pulled away then? When he leaned down to seal the contract with a kiss, should you have pulled away then? Or better yet, could you even pull away then?

You’ve been so alone your whole life that each moment with him is awakening, soul-crushing, mind-shattering and so damn weakening that you should’ve pulled away then. If anyone were to tell you you’d share your first kiss after work hours with a man whose name you don’t even know of, you’d tell them they were crazy, crazier if they claimed you would enjoy it.

But you did. Oh, you did, you were addicted to him – his taste, his scent, his touch, everything about him – that when he pulled away, taking away every last breath in your lung that formerly remained taint-free by him, you’re left wanting. Craving.

And he knows this. How could he not? Your eyes are hazy with lust, chest pressed against his firm ones that would soon be the same body you found home over and over again.  You’re not the only left intoxicated from this sudden agreement. Whatever you feel, he feels it twice as much after years of watching you from the sidelines, asking himself a million times over what it is about you that pulled him in so much in the first place.

The innocence? The dedication? The youthful naivety?

Gojo wants to laugh at himself. It was never any of those – he simply wanted to fool himself that maybe he’s worthy of this, of your love, of your purity. He’s selfish, manipulative, heartless, and he wants nothing more than someone like you to make him feel like he’s everything he’s not.

He steps forward to brush his nose against yours; breathing in the tiny gasps you reward him with. And he’s barely even touched you.

“I look forward to our next meeting,” he rasps, butterfly touches all the way down your back to hold you flush against him, letting you feel that he’s all muscle and hardness, while you’re the complete opposite, composed of softness and little ghosting kisses. Perhaps when he gives you by a name, he was right to call you –  “My Angel.”

The loud blaring of your alarm cuts through the silence of the room, its shrill sound piercing your ears. You groan, blindly patting the bedside table to swipe snooze. The spot next to you has been cold for a while now, but it’s normal for Satoru to leave early for work that you burrow yourself deeper in the covers. Five more minutes of sleep shouldn’t be so bad; it’s the weekend, anyway. You’ve got nothing else to do.

Waking up after that, on the other hand, now that is an impending task on itself.

You’re beyond sore, your inner thighs littered with handprints and your shoulder covered in love bites. “Jeez,” you mutter to yourself, stepping out of the bathroom. Tying your robe around you, you go out your shared bedroom, rubbing your eyes to get the sleep out.

It’s past noon already – Satoru really wore you out. And fuck, you could barely walk. You had to grip the counters just to sit on the stools, and even then, you’re wincing from the pain.

He should be doing paperwork in his office right now or something; he never really told you what to do. You don’t feel like asking either since he’s made it clear he prefers to keep his personal life, well…personal. But nevertheless, you swing your legs back and forth on the stool, texting him a quick I love you baby :)

Satoru doesn’t reply.

Usually, he’d respond in a few minutes, always supplied with a wink and an eggplant emoji. It was so him to act this way, that when those few minutes turned into a few hours and you’re met with radio silence, you can’t help but worry.

You try to brush it off, ignoring the deafening silence that rings all over his penthouse. He’s busy, he’s working, he’s got things to do – that’s all it is.

You convince yourself hard enough that you’ve cleaned the place until it’s sparkling, your reflection bouncing off the black marble floors. Every minute, though, your mind would race back to him. Not thinking about him proved to be a really daunting task because you think of him when you’re eating, reminiscing the way he’d always surprise you with a back hug, muttering morning angel all over your skin just to distract you from your meal. You think of him as you’re killing time with boring dramas; if he was here, he’d nudge your leg with his foot, pushing your shorts until it exposes your panties. He’d make sure you don’t get to focus at all, riling you up and kissing you hard that the show playing becomes nothing but background noise. You think of him, you dream of him, you remember him – and yet, you can’t feel him.

Nails bitten down to the skin, you scramble for your phone, swiping call over his contact. It doesn’t go through. Now that’s another odd thing; Satoru never fails to pick up your calls.

“He’s just busy,” you lie to yourself, telling the same thing over and over again even as night falls and you’re staring at the empty left side of the bed, hands smoothing over where the curve of his body would’ve been. “He’s just busy,” you say once more, giving into the exhaustion brought on by your worries. “He’ll come home soon. He always will.”

Except he didn’t.

And that was two weeks ago.

“Angel, I got you—” Satoru immediately clamps his shut, his footsteps muted as he walks closer to you. You’ve been dating for a few months now, and you’re still very wary of the nature of your relationship so you refuse to move in with him. He doesn’t mind, he respects your space and decisions, but now he’s starting to regret letting you have your way. You’re hunched over your swiveling chair, cheek pressed against the opened textbook and glasses perched on your hair. The lamp desk illuminates the dark circles lining your eyes, his heart breaking at the sight.

Thanks to his help, you’ve been able to spend more time focusing on your studies. It should be comforting, but Satoru’s heart aches as he thinks of what you’ve been like prior to meeting him.

How long have you stayed up all night just to pass your exams? How long have you cried yourself to sleep, unable to handle the burden placed by the world on your shoulders at such a young age? How long have you had to turn down friends’ invites to parties with a forced smile because you had to go to work? How many times have you stared at a failing mark, teeth clenched because you studied well for it; your exhaustion just got the best of you and muddled your brain?

Satoru places the beer and dinner he’s got you on his way back home on top of your one-man dining table, pressing a kiss at the top of your head. You look so beautiful this way – unaware, unknowing, and focused in nothing but the future ahead of you that you don’t bother yourself with his past.

Perhaps…it was comforting, after all.

He’d rather have you worry over your own studies than worry about him. Satoru can’t stomach the idea of you – his precious angel – being involved in his own shit, possibly get caught between the crossfire. It pains him to say it, but he doesn’t want you getting too close for comfort.

So he stays there by your side, simply because it would expel all ideas of you wanting to be beside him. He’ll be right where you’re safe, and the sigh that leaves your lips when he moves you to your bed, fitting in his long, lanky bed on your cramped mattress an immense struggle. As if feeling that you’re finally home, you snuggle closer to his chest, murmuring sweet nothings that tug at his heartstrings.

Satoru rubs circles at your back, staring so hard at the chipped paint on your wall that he’s sure he’s got it burned in his memory.

Now that he thinks about it, he should’ve been satisfied with that. He should’ve held back in his desire to have more of you. He should’ve just tucked you in and left, but he was never really in control of himself. Before he knew it, he’s pulled in by you too much, encouraging him to move in with you under the lie it’s easier to keep an eye on you.

Had he just left you earlier…would things have been different then?

He’s asked himself this question too many times. Satoru always came to one conclusion. He loved you way too much that it consumed him, and soon the love he held for you slowly burned you inch by inch. The only way to save you was to pull away – but he wasn’t ready for that yet, not now – but he’s too scared, too deep in love that he ignores the warning signals and holds you close instead, finding comfort in the warmth of your arms.

Fuck. Satoru downs his second drink, glaring at everyone beneath his shades. Geto snickers beside him, sending side eyes to his boss every now and then just to check. Of course, Satoru’s not actually going to pass out, he was no lightweight, but he’d been uneasy every since that pretentious gold envelope landed on his desk.

One of the downsides of being a mafia leader meant you had to mingle with other clan shit, including him of all people. There were always new leaders popping out of nowhere, Satoru quote unquoting, criminals be spawning like maniacs.

For fourteen years – fourteen fucking years – his clan had been in bad blood with the Zen’ins. They were pretty new in the illegal side of business, starting off as a powerful name in the trade industry before they got interested in oil. One thing led to another, the family began to realize they could have so much more if they turned a blind eye to a law or to, soon shifting into illegal weaponry trade, human trafficking, then drug manufacturing.

These bastards had the audacity to insult the Gojo Clan when Satoru’s family dropped by to strike a contract out of curiosity to their goods, only to be turned down because they’re ‘barbaric’ and ‘informal.’

Satoru still remembers that humiliating moment of being escorted out by bodyguards, but he held his head high, vowing to show that bastard Zen’in guy that the Gojo’s were one of the powerhouses for a reason. He doesn’t even know where the elderly guy got his confidence from. Mafia business was not the same as their former expertise, yet they acted all high and mighty with their rules and standard of being sophisticated even in a life or death situation.

Gojo doesn’t know whether he should be happy or sad that the old man died, his son taking over just as soon as his father perished. He would’ve celebrated with a whiskey or two, except the new clan leader was quite adamant in cleaning up their name to prove he would not create the same mistake his father did.

The new leader threw a large cruise party, inviting pretty much everyone they were chummy with, and Satoru has never felt more out of place. He recognized a face or two, but he couldn’t really give a fuck. He hated events like this – it was all about establishing power and face.

Satoru groaned under his breath, swiping at another flute as a waiter passed by. He felt the bubbles fizzle down his throat, the slight burning sensation somewhat easing his nerves.

He leans back at the wall and checks his watch for what seemed like the hundredth time that night. It’s been two fucking hours since they arrived, and the host still hadn’t arrived. If they planned on being ‘fashionably late’ Satoru won’t hesitate to slice someone’s neck tonight. He hates his time being wasted the most, and his eyes slid over to his friend’s still posture, looking like he just saw a ghost.

“Suguru,” he sighs through his mouth, “Don’t be so tense. This is a formal event – no blood will be shed tonight.” Suguru had a weird skill of being able to read Satoru’s thoughts that he raised his hands in surrender, silently promising that he’s not going to kill anyone.

“You’re not sure of that.”

“I won’t lose my composure, if that’s what you’re worried about,” he rolls his eyes, not looking back as he effortlessly places the empty glass back to another waiter. Satoru stands next to his friend, sucking his teeth out of boredom. Suguru, on the other hand, is tenser than ever, his eyes locked onto something in the middle of the crowd that began to cheer.

Faintly, somewhere at the back of his mind, Satoru hears someone whistle in signal. A few seconds later, the fireworks are lit and decorate the night sky, bursts of gold and beauty accompanying the entrance of the woman who’s so effortlessly caught everyone’s eye tonight.

Satoru is rooted to his spot, taking off his glasses the same time the crowd parts. Then, his breath is knocked away from his body, his heart pumping so hard he actually struggled to breathe.

Because you’re there, smiling and waving at the crowd as if it’s second nature to you. Seven years of being apart from one another and Satoru is still bewitched each time he lays his eyes on you. You’re the same…from your face down to the angelic feeling you always carried, but at the same time, you’re different. Gone was his precious angel who shied away from too much attention, his precious angel who would’ve never worn such a bodacious ring embedded on her left ring finger. Your smile is more charismatic, confident, and even fierce compared to the small, private ones you always shared with him – he almost couldn’t recognize you.

As if feeling someone’s eyes on you, you spot him leaning languidly against the walls, those lips you used to kiss turned downwards.

Seven years ago, you would’ve kissed him until he smiles again, singing to your pouty and clingy boyfriend who never voiced out the reason of his troubles. Seven years ago, he would’ve carried you and swung you around, showering you with affection as he reminds you how lucky he is to have you.

But this was no longer the past – that much is clear from when he left you without another word.

Still, you smile at him, an empty one that showed nothing but concealed anger. He was sure though, so fucking sure, that for a split second, he saw you light up. That may have been seven years ago, but you loved each other to the point of insanity – surely you still held some sort of fondness of him.

Satoru takes long, self-assured stride towards you, his gaze never leaving yours with his hands tucked into his pockets. There’s no telling what he’ll do, but in his mind, it’s clear.

You still love him, he still loves you. He’ll do something about it. It doesn’t matter what, he just will. That was until a young man closer to your age with blond hair and pierced earrings, narrow feline eyes lined with eyeliner hobbles beside you, his weight supported by a cane that Satoru stops in his movements.

He’d recognize that face anywhere.

The youngest and perhaps most mischievous leader of them all, Naoya Zen’in. Albeit not as hard-headed as his father in comparison with his rather laid-back and welcoming nature, Satoru knows a monster when he sees it. It takes one to know one, after all, and despite the heir being crippled from a former accident, his intelligence and power was not to be overlooked through his appearance and coy smiles.

In fact, he might even be more dangerous than his old man, this theory only proven when his arms snake around your waist. The matching rings gleam from under the light, and you press yourself closer to him to whisper in his ear, your attention very much still on Satoru.

Satoru’s entire body burns.

“Still there, Sir?” Suguru asks, gripping his boss’ bicep to hold him back. Smart of him, Satoru exhales through his nose, unable to stop his glare from darting to your husband’s.

He’s heard of you, of him, of how his most annoying rival had a phenomenal trophy wife who looked harmless at first look, but was actually the brains of most of his operations. Satoru forgets how to breathe normally because he’s heard of you, and the rumors he’s gotten wind of about Naoya’s trophy wife are nothing less of how dedicated and perfect the two of you are.

Slapping Suguru’s arm away from him, Satoru grits his teeth. “Get me a drink.”

His precious angel was gone. No, this woman that stood before him…you were an entirely different entity, something darker, something along the lines that were more like him.

What exactly happened the day he left you?

taglist: @ladywaifuuwrites​ @savantsoulfinder​ @my-reality-is-in-my-head​ tagging the ones who asked for part 2, please let me know if you’d like to be added or removed!

[nemir]

“obviously not.”

✞——————❆——————✞

» pairing; xyx x mc

» word count: 2,761 words

» content; heavy angst, relationship problems, cold shoulder, selfish MC.

» an; yall reeeeally wanted a part 2 to THIS. y’sure about that? 🤭

You weren’t quite sure just how long it had been since you last spoke with xyx. The days all seemed to meld together, between this and work. You could hardly tell if you were coming or going half the time, and most nights you had come home and just sank immediately into bed. In a way, it was a bit of a blessing. At least you weren’t thinking too much about what had happened; you didn’t really have time or the brain capacity.

But there was still that gnawing feeling in the back of your mind. Even when you did manage to get online, you didn’t see his messages in chat. You assumed they were probably just buried by other conversations, and you could only scroll back so far before everything would start to lag. Still, it was enough for you to be concerned, which you finally brought up to Toast, about a week and a half later. NakedToaster: i mean i’ve talked to him a few times but NakedToaster: not much besides typical hey how are ya, when are you getting in-game. that kinda stuff. MC: oh... I see. but his messages are showing up for you??? NakedToaster: he hasnt said much in general in the past little while so i couldnt rly tell you. we have our own channel lol but i can see them there. NakedToaster: maybe the server’s just acting up or something? wouldnt be the first time tbh MC: i guess so. ugh. i just hope he’s doing alright NakedToaster: well NakedToaster: he’s been having a pretty tough time with his latest client NakedToaster: the case has been bad so far. NakedToaster: not that you needed me to tell you that lmao MC: oh.. uh, y-yeah haha, that case. i know he was stressed about it from the beginning. Your hands were shaking over the keyboard. You didn’t even know about this new client. He never mentioned anything of it to you. His voice rang through your head, ‘oh right, because you never fucking asked’. MC: well, thanks toasty. im glad to know he’s at least... semi-active. i guess ive just missed being online at the same time. im sure i’ll catch him soon. NakedToaster: np ✞——————❆——————✞ He wasn’t a fan of lying, but he would do it to protect one of his best friends. Toast absolutely knew what was going on. He knew the day it happened. He was in the middle of a dungeon when xyx had messaged him. xyx: have you ever noticed how much [MC] talks about themselves? NakedToaster: LMAOOOO xyx: ... Oh. They knew xyx was being genuine, and quickly followed up with questions. What do you mean, how long has this been going on, what’s happening? Of course, xyx being xyx, it was hard to get every detail but he wasn’t going to push it. It was clear he was upset, and that’s all that mattered to Toast. So Toast did some digging of their own. He had casually brought it up to Quest one night, making sure not to mention xyx at all. NakedToaster: idk, someone mentioned it to me so i thought i’d ask. i honestly dont pay enough attention to tell myself Quest: Hmm.. Quest: A quick look through the logs doesn’t give much, honestly. But truth to tell.. We all kind of talk about ourselves a lot, don’t you think? Quest: Well, ha ha, some of us. :^) NakedToaster: i mean u have ur reasons lol Quest: Right. Quest: If anyone talks about themselves too much, it’s nightowl. LOL NakedToaster: LOLLLL Quest: Honestly, it’s probably just that [MC] feels comfortable enough around us to vent, y’know? I can’t blame ‘em for that. But if there are anymore issues, make sure to let me know! It wasn’t the response he was really looking for, but he still brought it up to xyx in a call - something that was once a rarity and was now becoming an almost nightly occurrence. “I know I should’ve asked you first, but I figured if anybody would’ve noticed anything, it would’ve been Quest.” “Nah, you’re fine mate. I, uh.. appreciate it. I wouldn’t have been able to ask him myself. Prob’ly wouldn’t have.” xyx chuckled a bit nervously, scratching idly at his arm. “What, uh, what did he say? Outta curiosity.” Toast frowned a bit and leaned back in their chair, arms crossing. “That he hadn’t noticed anything. He even went back through the logs a bit. Just kinda chalked it up to them feeling like this is a safe space to vent, and that nightowl does it all the fucking time - which he isn’t really wrong about, I guess.” Xyx’s arms fell to the desk with a grumble, “It’s not the fucking same! Nobody’s hung out with them as much as I have, not even close. It’s a near constant! Toasty, they don’t even know the name of my client.” “Wait, what? But they said you talked to them about the case-” “They never fucking asked.” Of course, there was client confidentiality in place, so it’s not as if xyx could go into crazy details, but not even to ask the name, or a vague idea of what was going on. Nothing. But even then! Who else was he supposed to vent this shit to? “There was a day where I just put the camera on Cat and fucked off. They didn’t even realize.” Toast didn’t know what to say or how to react to that. He was just staring at xyx, disgust clear on his face. Xyx shrugged and slumped back into his chair. “I blocked them. I just couldn’t handle it.” “You- wait, what? Oh my god, that makes so much sense. They were wondering why they weren’t able to see your messages in chat.” ✞——————❆——————✞ Another week and a half went by. You were really starting to get nervous now. There were times, before, where he’d disappear and go offline for a day or two but he always came back. You knew he needed days and some time to himself, that wasn’t an issue. But this... this was different. You still weren’t able to see any of his messages in chat, and he was constantly offline. You even called in sick to work and stayed online all day, just in the hopes of catching him. Nothing. But you didn’t want to reach out. You were afraid to, in a way, because you don’t want to pressure him or make things worse. It hurts to just... leave it, but you did. For a time, until you finally broke and sent him a quick message in the private channel you two are in. MC: heyy. i hope you’re doing okay. i miss you.. i’ve been thinking a lot about what happened and i feel fucking awful. You’re right, i’ve been incredibly selfish and.. i really hope that you can forgive me. i want to make this right, but i’m not going to make any moves until you’re ready. i’ll be here when you are. xo His response came a week later. Finally. It was a single sentence, “i read your message.” He absolutely did. Read it out loud to Toast, too. Toast, after hearing everything, had only become increasingly bitter toward you - something you picked up on as time went on. Xyx is one of his best friends, and you really hurt him. It wasn’t something they were going to so easily forgive. So when xyx read your message, Toast rolled his eyes so hard, they gave themselves a headache. It took xyx a while to type out a full response. He’s hurting. Between work stress, health stress, Cat stress, and now this? It had clearly been eating at him for a while. He doesn’t know if he can handle this, on top of everything else. When the two of you went into this relationship, it was a beautiful thing. It had a very promising start! But.. as time went on, xyx started noticing and picking up on things. Things that started to irk him. At first, he tried to play it off; if anybody understood needing to vent and not really having a safe outlet to do so, it was him. He knew that you just wanted him to know what was going on in your life - you were long distance, after all. And sometimes he would vent as well, though it was becoming a rare occurrence. He didn’t like to talk about his feelings that much, which was no secret. But you had managed to pull things out of him, and he did appreciate it, in a way. It made him realize that, yes, he can be vulnerable around people because he is cared about, and people want to make sure he’s okay. It made him realize that he was capable of feeling love, and giving love in return. He’ll forever be thankful for that, but... This had been going on for so long, and you never even fucking noticed. You never took the time. Even when he tried to bring it up, it was just met with you either talking over him, or trying to relate to everything he was saying then going into a tangent of your own. “Oh well, have you tried this? It worked for me!”, or “Yeah, that happened to me before! Here’s the entire story!”, and the ever classic “I TOTALLY understand what you’re going through!” But instead of letting him talk and finish what he was saying, you took over the entire conversation. You went on your own diatribe about how you were feeling, how you handled whichever situation (or didn’t), about your experiences. And by the time you were done talking, you didn’t even have the decency to apologize for hijacking the conversation, or worse still, ask him to continue with his story. You just jumped to a completely different topic, and xyx was left holding onto those feelings, never to be brought up again. MC: can... can we call? xyx: no. im not rly feeling up to it MC: i understand, and that’s okay! (you know this worked before!) i just feel like something like this would be easier if we could just... talk. xyx: (it took him a few minutes to respond. he kept backspacing ‘i’m sorry, but no’) i really dont want to. xyx: this already sucks. i dont really want to make it any worse for myself. You were waiting for the “or you”, but it never came. But he was typing! That’s a good sign. MC: okay, that’s fine!! i’ll just wait until you’re finished typing! You were trying to sound hopeful, and you hoped it was coming across. You still would have preferred to have this talk over voice but this was better than nothing. At least he was talking to you. xyx: its my turn to talk now. there’s a part of me that wants to give you the benefit of the doubt - i guess that’s second nature to me. but my head just keeps screaming not to, that there’s no way i could, or should. i need you to know that you’ve hurt me. and yeah, im sure it wasn’t your intention, but impact over intention. you still did it, and continued to do it. it was as if... honestly it was as if you didn’t even realize it but then i say to myself, well no, how could they not? it was fairly obvious, at least to me it was. and, y’know, maybe i could have tried to speak up more but there was no point. i feel like, if i had brought it up, you’d find some way to make it about yourself and that was quite honestly the last thing i wanted. this will hurt to hear probably, but not out of any sort of sympathy or compassion to you, but because i was sick and tired of hearing it. every single day, there was something new. something that happened that you had to tell me about. we didn’t even be on the subject of it, but you’d somehow find a way to make each conversation about you. i know i don’t like talking about my feelings or my problems that much. i can do without it. but that doesn’t give you free reign to just... make everything about you. when you do that, it makes me feel like you don’t care. about me, or how i’m feeling, or what’s going on in my life. hell, you hardly ask about Cat anymore! the one thing i’d be more than willing to talk about, and you couldn’t even bring yourself to stop being the centre of the universe for five fucking minutes to ask how my pet was doing. how am i meant to take all that? i can almost guarantee that if the roles were reversed, you would’ve thrown a fit over it. but i didn’t. and the only reason why i didn’t is because i care about you and, deep down, i wanted to make sure that you were okay, because honestly? for a while there... you were the one constant in my life. you didn’t leave, you treated me like a human being. you were nice, understanding.. you even listened. but you... you don’t anymore. and you haven’t for a long time. and, look, i really don’t want to hear anything about how i didn’t try either, or some other bullshit narrative, because i honest to god did. but half the time, i couldn’t get a word in edgewise, or what i did say was brushed aside. do you have any idea how that feels? the one person who cared about me most, who even went so far as to say they loved me - and who i loved, just dismissing everything i try to say. that fucking hurt. i felt better when i got into my accident. i keep wanting to apologize for some stupid reason. like i’m the one who fucked up here somehow. i must’ve just gotten used to not caring about myself or how i felt that i just.. kept letting it happen, thinking it would get better.. always fucking thinking everything will get better, but it never does, does it? ive been shown that time and time again. makes me feel like a prat for getting my hopes up, but that’s what i get, i guess. why did i let myself think this time would be any different? ultimately, this is the end. i can’t keep going through with this. i’ve learned a lot of valuable things from you that, i’m sure in time, maybe, i’ll get better about. and i’m staring with this. i’m not.. i can’t keep putting myself in these situations and staying there. this.. this isn’t serving me anymore. that’s something you used to tell me all the time, right? “if it doesn’t serve you, get rid of it” so, that’s what i’m doing. i hope in the future you’re able to find someone who will want nothing more than to hear you talk all day. i dunno. maybe you should just get a pet instead. you don’t have to worry about leaving the server or anything, i wouldn’t ask you to do that. but, i won’t be either. but i will be blocking you. again. i suggest you do the same. i mean, in the end it’s your choice, but.. yeah.  uh... have a good one. You saw it was a huge chunk of text. Paragraphs worth. Your response was a simple, “oh! that’s a lot, heh, give me a minute to read through it!”  You wish you hadn’t. You had an awful, gut-wrenching feeling when you saw the wall of text pop up that it wasn’t going to be good. You were cursing yourself, unable to tear your eyes from the screen even as the tears welled, and your chest felt like it was going to implode with how tight it was feeling, the way your entire body was trembling. You should have just stuck to your guns. It felt like you had the wind knocked out of you completely by the time you finished. All manner of liquid and nastiness was pouring from your face, but you couldn’t stop. You dropped your hands to the keyboard, hoping and praying that you still had time to send a message. MC: xyx, no wait, please!! i want to talk to you about this, please. BloomBot: Oops! Your message could not be sent.