#i knew pat watch aarons games :D

[masterandapprentice]

Ahahaha but Pat xD

*Aaron Rodgers gets hurts by Bill's defense*

*Patrick Mahomes tweets inmediately*

That's ok baby, don't worry, we still love you :3

Sorry, I need to take it light while knowing if Aaron's injury is serious ):

Also, X is getting hilarious with all the Jets tweets about the situation lol sorry!

[marvinswriting]

football

hurt/comfort(/hurt?) three :))

prompt: tinies becoming suddenly aware of their size/Shane omen is a bully, Marvin, write him

Jesus if you insist

GENERALIZED TW: death (fear of it, mentioned, and/or, actual death); harassment; d slur

G/T MEAN GIRLS AU

How did I get in this position?

Being out in the courtyard alone went against every rule I set for myself. 

Not only was I alone, but I also didn't tell anyone where I was. Nobody knew to look for me.

It was my study hall. 

I thought I could just chill in the tiny area, doodle a bit, and get fresh air. 

"Space dyke. I'm talking to you."

I know. I'm hoping if I ignore you, you'll go away.

"Yo, spa-"

"Yes?" I snap my head up, glaring at Shane. Quite frankly, I'm just fucking annoyed. 

He seems taken aback by my attitude before a frown crosses his face. "Snappy eh? What's wrong with you."

"Please leave me alone," I say, pulling out my phone. I need to let someone know where I am before this gets bad. 

"Hey!" Shane snaps his fingers, causing me to flinch up. "Phone down. I'm talking to you."

As much as I want to send Damian a text, I know its best not to give Shane a reason to fuck with me. 

"Yes?" I say. There's mild annoyance in my voice that I don't bother hiding.

Shane grins but its condescending. It makes my skin crawl.

"Actually, I should be going." I say, quickly grabbing my bad and standing up.

"No, you're not going anywhere."

He grabs me off the platform. 

"Why are you doing this?!" I squirm in his grip but it's not working.

This went from zero to one hundred very fast.

Shane goes to respond but the bell rings, to his dismay and my delight.

He drops me back onto the platform, but it's not far. Maybe a human foot. I've taken worse.

"You tinies are so easy to fuck with." He states. "And so trusting of humans. Maybe not me, but do you really think your bigger friends care? That girl from Africa only got introduced to tinies last year. I'd give it time before she realizes its much more fun to fuck with you rather than be nice to you. I'm surprised your other friends haven't either. Karen's always been slow, yeah that's on her. But Gretchen and that gay kid? Do you actually think they enjoy the company of an annoying and dependent tiny? Tinies are just walking hazards. Literally anything hurts you. It's so annoying."

Wow, so we went from physical abuse to verbal. Sweet.

I stand shakily and turn away to the tiny entrance to the school. Shane keeps talking over my shoulder but I don't listen. 

He's wrong.

Right?

He has to be.

'I'd give it time before she realizes its much more fun to fuck with you rather than be nice to you.'

Cady wouldn't do that.

She cares too much.

Yeah, her initial over protective worrying nature over tinies didn't fade, but that didn't mean she wasn't adjusted. It just meant she cared.

I walked through the hall in a daze. I'm vaguely aware that I'm bumping into other students as I walked to the tiny pick up zone, but I paid their dirty glares no mind.

Not everyone says tinies are playthings. It wasn't that Karen was slow or that Gretchen and Damian were weird. Its that the simply saw the value in tiny lives.

Right?

I continue my zoned out trek around the tiny section of the school. I think I can do it with my eyes closed at this point as I put no concentration into where I'm going. 

Not everyone thought like Shane Omen. Some people cared about tiny lives. 

Right?

I make my way to the tiny pick up zone.

"Hey, Jan!" Damian is already there, with a big grin on his face.

His smile is contagious and as always when I'm with him, my worry fades.

"Damian!" I climb onto his hand and he brings me to his shoulder. We have lunch with the whole group today, plastics included. 

"So, how was study hall?"

"Good." I lie. I feel bad about lying to Damian, but I don't need him to get all worried if he knows I ran into Shane Omen.

We make out way into the cafeteria to see Cady, Gretchen, and Karen sitting at the center table, normally reserved for only plastics. As Damian walks closer I see Regina and Aaron too, obviously. 

"Hello, everyone!" Damian says sitting next to Cady. I slip down his arm and onto the table ignoring his gasp.

"Janis."

"Yes?" I throw up jazz hands with a smile. 

"Don't-"

"Do that. I know."

"And she does it anyway," Regina says with a fond smile.

Fuck Shane Omen. These are my friends. They care about me. 

I think.

Cady talks about her mathletes competition coming up and we all listen as we eat. I was leaning against Damian's forearm with Regina across from me. Aaron was on Cady's shoulder. 

Loser.

As if she's thinking the same thing as me, Regina blows a raspberry at Aaron.

"What?" He called out with a laugh.

"Table gang." Regina says with a dead straight face.

"Tabe gang?!" I ask, letting out a laugh.

"Yes." Regina's monotone voice doesn't falter but she lets a small grin slip which she instantly pushed down. "Table gang. Come on down Aaron."

"That sounds so threatening. I'll stay up here."

Regina tsks, shaking her head. "I'm sorry it had to come to this." She gets up. "Cady stay still."

"What?" The mathlete asks, watching with concern as Regina climbs up onto her arm.

"Jesus Christ, Janis, look what you did!" Aaron laughs. 

"How is this my fault!"

"You're all rubbing off on each other." Damian shakes his head. "If it's for better or worse it's debatable. 

Regina reaches Cady's shoulder and shoves Aaron off. 

Cady gasps, her hand shooting out to catch Aaron. 

"Regina!"

She shrugs. "Got him down."

Cady places Aaron on the table and scoops Regina onto the table too. "Please don't give me a heart attack."

"I'll try. But for the record that's boring." Regina says, examining her nails.

We all laugh a bit. It feels nice, periods like this where we can all just hang out.

"Heads!" A voice calls from over at the varsity jocks table. 

I gasp as a football lands like a foot (in tiny measurements) away from me. 

Holy shit.

It rolls a little stopping in the center of the table. I'm frozen in shock, curled up close to Damian. 

Holy fucking shit!

I could have died just there.

Crushed by a fucking football.

A jock comes running over to the table, apologizing profusely and retrieving the ball. I think he's apologizing more for hitting a ball near the plastics then almost killing me though.

We all kinda sit in a silent shock as he walks away.

The playful energy at the table a couple of seconds ago is gone. 

I shakily pat down my body to make sure I am in fact- still here.

"You-" Aaron swallows. "Jesus Christ. Janis are you okay?"

"It missed," I say weakly throwing up jazz hands. It does nothing to clear the tense air though. "I think."

"You think?" Gretchen asked.

I shrug. "It was so close I don't even know."

I look up to Damian and he's still staring wide-eyed. "I thought it hit you at first."

"We all did." Karen says.

I shift under the intense concern everyone is throwing me.

He had a point.

"I'm fine, guys!" I hate having people worry about me or get sappy or- ew.

"I thought it hit you." Damian repeated. "Oh my god."

I would be dead.

A stupid football would be my cause of death.

The same object tossed around for game could kill me. 

Tinies are just walking hazards. Literally anything hurts you. It's so annoying.

Shane's words from earlier echo in my head.

He- he wasn't wrong.

As much as I hated to admit it. 

I wasn't even four inches tall. 

I was surrounded by people who could take advantage of me and just scoop me up without me being able to fight back.

They're my friends and wouldn't.

But they could.

Because I'm small and insignificant. 

I can literally fit into Damian's hands.

A football almost killed me.

"Jan?" I look up. Damian's voice is soft and it matched the worry in his eyes. "You sure you're okay?"

"I almost died." It comes out as a whisper. I know Damian can't hear it. The cafeteria is loud and buzzing. Still, Damian scoops me up. He holds me carefully to his chest, his hands cupping me protectively.

Its all I need in the moment to feel safe. 

Damian's presence seems to be all I ever need to feel safe.

I can hear the conversation slowly and tentatively start up again at the table, but I just concentrate on Damian's heartbeat. The way his hands are warm. Even though my body was shaking as it came down from an adrenaline rush, I felt secure.

No matter how small I was, or how insignificant other people thought tinies lives were, I knew I could count on all my friends. Especially Damian.

No,,,, she didn't die yET

@realmisspolarbear @musicallygt @smallsoysauce @sourishlemons

[grimweaver]

A piece from 2011. Bear in mind that a lot of details (too many to list) have been changed since then and I was fresh into writing Elder Scrolls stories at the time. 

----

PART I

It seemed too perfect to exist outside the pages of a storybook; a hillside farm house with a grand view of the Imperial City, not far from the edge of the Upper Niben. It was a piece of country undisturbed by the bothersome ruckus of town, but close enough to the city to make the weekly trip for necessities hassle-free. Aaron was especially ecstatic about the new home, but for his own special reasons. There were more insects and small animals for the young boy to catch and play with, and the nature-enthusiast had a lot of yard explore.

"Remember, this is not at all like the city!" A voice called out from the front porch. "Do not wander too far or out of sight." "Da!" Aaron blasted from where he was playing, not more than a hundred feet away. "I'm ten years old! I'm almost a man!" "Doesn't matter- there are things out here that make an easy meal out of people- boy or man."

"Yeah, and you face them almost every day!"

"Because it's been my job for almost fifteen years now. I have skills and wits that help me survive each encounter."

Indeed. Since the raw age of thirteen his father made a living as a large game hunter. Because he was one of the few that dared to take on an animal twice the size of an average man he was well respected and heavily paid. It didn't hurt that, as one born under the Shadow, he had the ability to make himself invisible for a brief amount of time- that was a valuable power for someone who had to strike his target before it even suspected that it had company. One could say he managed well for a single parent, but because he was alone it was still a struggle in the beginning. But when Aaron was older and experienced enough to share chores and look after himself, it lightened the burden his father had to carry.

Aaron noticed him wincing with a sharp, backwards hiss through his teeth. He abruptly jumped to his feet and raced over to see what he was doing, carrying the large toad he caught in his gentle hands.

After reaching the steps of the the porch he was met with an unexpected and disturbing sight. "Da? What are you doing?"

"Something I've meant to do for a long time." His father's right arm was covered in red marks, which were made by the edge of the dagger he carefully scraped over his skin. But careful or not the bleeding couldn't be avoided. Aaron was shocked and confused by what seemed like an act of insanity. Perhaps being bored out of his mind in the country was what drove him to do it. "And I think you're old enough to understand why I'm doing this."

"Ya, I really hope you do tell me why you're cut'n yerself up! Are ya going crazy?" "No." His father chuckled. "Y'know that this part of my arm was always covered, right? Wrist bands, long sleeves, gloves, gauntlets..." "Yeah, come to think of it." "And you see what I've been covering up, since I haven't finished removing it?" "A... tattoo. But da you have a few others that y'never cover up. Why this one?" "Because this one was a declaration to the world of a commitment and promise."

Aaron was in silent contemplation for a moment, sighing as he watched the remaining black marks on his father's skin turn red. He cringed, not because he was abhorred by wounds, but because he thought about how much the process of removing the tattoo must hurt.

"To ma?" Was all he uttered after being quiet for so long.

His father paused briefly as he looked down at him with his solemn brown eyes, before narrowing his brow and coldly paraphrasing. "To the woman that gave birth to you. There are probably a thousand things one could call her, but 'ma' is not one of them." He continued scraping.

Aaron's brow popped up. Had he been a boy who knew his mother at all he would've been offended by his father's criticism, which seethed with an old contention. But until he learned about how life began he thought Lucien LaChance was the only parent he ever had.

"That's gonna scar bad." Aaron pointed out, half distracted from the subject. "Probably. But it'll be much easier to look at." He smirked as he applied a disinfecting paste to his arm.

"What happened?" He asked, taking his gaze off of Lucien's arm to give him direct eye contact. "Please, da. Like ya said I'm old enough to know... and don't sugar-coat it." "I never have, and I certainly don't intend to now. You deserve the unadulterated truth."

Aaron seated himself on the old wooden chair next to Lucien, waiting attentively for what he believed was going to be a long story. As Lucien began to wrap his arm he searched the sky for his reflection.

"She got into the skooma... and then entered the world that revolved around it. She left us for it... and then it killed her." Was all he said, crunching the entire story down to a few simple sentences. Aaron sighed heavily, petting the toad as he watched it's throat bubble out each time it took in a breath.

"I'm sorry, buddy." Lucien heaved as he slouched back. "It's alright." "We've been doing just fine on our own haven't we? I've tried to be both parents... to give you a happy life..." "I know... yeah everything's fine. I never knew her so... it's not that big'a deal. I'm happy. But are you happy?" Lucien chuckled. "You make me happy, kiddo. I think that I'd be lost in this world without ya." "Aaaw." Aaron made a wry face at his father's 'mushy' words. That's when he decided to change the topic. "So, y'gotta hunt tonight?"

"No, Aaron. It's Sundas. We're going into town." "We?" "Yes, 'we'. You and I." "But what about the goats? Don't ya want me t-" "They'll be fine. I put plenty of food in the trough to keep them happy all day. Go wash up real quick cause if we want to be back before sunset we gotta leave in a few minutes. Alright?" "Sure!"

Aaron bolted through the creaky front door with zeal in his heart. Lucien picked up the toad that was sitting contently on the table in front of him and gave it a quick pat on the head before releasing him into the field.

Lucien did not 'sugar-coat' the story at all, but he withheld lot of details. He did not want to be a man that allowed his past to consume him or anyone else. That is why he decided to finally remove that tattoo, which was a part of a traditional Imperial marriage. He did not want to drown others in the grimy tales of what he had to endure since the night his ex-wife, Rosalla, started behaving strangely. He also avoided telling Aaron that it began shortly after he was born because he knew that the boy would ask if it had anything to do with him, and Lucien would have to answer truthfully. The truth was 'yes'.

No one needs that on their conscience. He thought.

As Lucien waited for Aaron, the memories he struggled to distance himself from lurched out. Memories of Rosalla's mood swings that got worse and more frequent during the five days that followed Aaron's birth; Lucien was verbally and physically assaulted every time he returned from a hunt- she was convinced that 'hunting' was a code word for 'seeing other women'. It wasn't the truth, but the quirky voice in her head told her that it was. The voice also told her that Lucien drank heavily and hit her with the broken leg of a chair, and she distributed those rumors through her equally eccentric friends. Fortunately the people Lucien had to worry about receiving those rumors knew it was a lie, seeing no evidence whatsoever that she was even pinched.

Lucien didn't know it at the time, but this was the first prominent sign that Rosalla was ingesting skooma. If he did he would've been prepared for the next appalling act that happened a week later. He returned one night to a house void of anyone but a very neglected infant. Aaron was crying at the top of his lungs over several things that were not tended to- he was hungry, heavily soiled, cold, and deprived of parental love for what seemed like the entire day. The desperate father rifled through the entire town for help because he did not have the means to feed him. Fortunately Velus of the Merchant's Inn had a good alternative to breast milk and the starving child was finally well fed.

Rosalla's whereabouts and reason for absence was unknown to him for quite some time. After another week, worry promptly turned into fury when she returned. She was not kidnapped, trapped, or harmed in any other way- she was staying in one of the hotel rooms at "The King and Queen Tavern", taking in enough shots of skooma to completely loose sense of time and concern for anything but herself. Lucien demanded an explanation, and that is when she revealed to him the shady life of self abuse that involved not only skooma but lewd activities with groups of men and women that were also lost to the substance. She poured out all of her hatred for the tedious repetition of...

"Eating, baby, cooking, baby, sleeping, baby! No more thrills! No more joy! Just routine!" She screamed.

She did not have Lucien's sympathy. Instead he expressed how disgusted he was by her lack of strength and willpower. He contested with the fact that...

"Everyone has to put up with a long stretch of dull and strenuous routine every now and then! That's life! And it's not like this all the time, you just dwell on nothing but the negative and ignore all the wonderful things that are right there within reach- I ask if you want to go out you pout'n say you don't feel like it! I ask if you want me to stay home and you say you want me to go ahead and get the hell out of the house and leave you alone! You are such a piece of work! And this skooma... and everything you've been doing... God, I thought you were above this! I never thought you were stupid enough to fall into it... do you know what it does.. or what it has done to you!"

It was pointless for Lucien to recount the fact that he didn't leave everything up to her. He helped out around the house when he was able to- but Rosalla stubbornly believed that she did everything and he did nothing. She hardly noted the many nights Lucien got less than two hours of sleep because he offered to lift the baby burdens off of her weary shoulders. But the one thing that made it clear to Lucien that Rosalla was no longer going to be in the picture was the unforgivable act of abandoning the infant. It was not going to take more than one incident to convince him to extinguish her from their lives. So the night that Rosalla returned was also the night he would see her for the last time. Out of fear of harassment Lucien decided to move out of the Waterfront District house and live secretly with Velus and his wife Janine. One month later, imperial legionnaires reported to LaChance that they found Rosalla's body in Bravil.

He felt no remorse.

The first five years did not simply roll by- they sluggishly moved through a horrible grit. Such times in Cyrodiil were unkind to single parents.

But we made it. I don't know how... but we always found a way. Lucien thought. One can get through anything if they have unwavering faith and spiritual endurance.

Lucien did not give up, and keeping his son in mind inspired him to preserver.

[sylvesterelle]

All for the game B I R D S l Andrew/Neil l Read on Ao3

He patted the dashboard near Andrew’s hand, not quite touching. “As long as you know you’re the prettiest bird of all.”

“I will push you out of this car, junkie.”

Or: something soft, and kind, and just between the two of them in the weeks after The King's Men.

“Bluebird.”

They were sitting, as they often sat, on the edge of the roof at Fox Tower, the sky in that slippery space between night and dawn.

“Hmm?” Neil asked, bleary with exhaustion and a sleepy satisfaction, a warmth that, improbably, hadn’t dimmed in the weeks since the season ended.

“Bluebird," Andrew repeated, arms hung over the newly-installed metal railing, eyes trained on everything and nothing.

Neil looked out over the parking lot, frowning. “Where? I don’t see one.”

Andrew flicked his cigarette ashes in Neil’s direction without looking. “Listen, junkie.”

Neil closed his eyes, uncharacteristically amenable. He hadn’t had much call to listen to bird song in his life, neither this one nor the one that came before.

For a minute, he didn’t hear much of anything. The muted hum of a lone car on the highway nearby, maybe. The steady sound of Andrew breathing beside him.

But there—was that?

It was soft, coming from the east. A few trilling notes, not really a song at all. But there was something in the sound. Something light that drew a faint pressure in his chest, an emotion he couldn’t really name.

He opened his eyes and looked closer at the trees beside the lot. There—a flash of blue in a Carolina pine.

Neil pulled his knee up, resting his chin there as he watched. "Pretty."

Andrew snorted. “Weak. If a sparrow, even a starling, comes, the parents won’t stay to protect the nest. Even if there’s eggs; even if they’ve hatched.”

The crease deepened between Neil’s brows. “What do the sparrows do?”

Andrew shrugged. “Kill them. Build their nest on the bodies, sometimes.”

“Naturally.”

The bluebird flew away, but the moment stretched on.

The blonde turned his gaze to him, level and unasking. Neil understood anyway.

“Yes,” he said, not lifting his head from his knee.

Andrew reached out with his free hand, threaded his fingers through Neil’s hair. Still auburn, but lightened by the sun as the weeks slipped toward summer.

They’d spent a lot of time on that roof, since the season ended. Midnight practices went later now that finals were over. And more often than not, Neil found his feet carrying him towards the stairs rather than to his room afterwards, no threat of classes or early morning practice calling out for better judgement. Sometimes following Andrew, sometimes of his own accord—though where Neil went, Andrew would inevitably follow.

It was still May, but the low country heat already lasted well into the night and they didn’t bother changing from their practice clothes. Their overheated skin cooling against stone was a welcome relief, the air humid and heavy as it washed over them.

The campus lights drowned out some of the stars, but not all—not the brightest. Neil pointed out his favorites, the markers and constellations his mother had forced him to learn not for their beauty, but for their usefulness in case he got lost. In case he needed to run with nothing but the clothes on his back, and the knowledge in his head.

The memories felt closer in the night. But there was safety there, too. A feeling like they were the last two people on earth, an island of concrete in the night. Each touch was amplified by the leftover energy of the court, the cooled air, the privacy the darkness brought.

But the mornings…those were sweetest. When the light crept over campus in the east and the few students coming and going through the night had all but disappeared, Neil no longer felt they were an island, but no longer felt the loss of it, either. As the buildings of campus took shape and the orange walls of court were gentled in the light, Neil felt deeply settled. Deeply himself. I am here, his body seemed to say, I exist. Surrounded by the people he’d chosen, the place he’d claimed as his own, the dawn was an affirmation. Another night lived through, another day won as Neil Josten.

He wasn’t sure if Andrew felt it too, but he knew the man was aware of his reaction to the day. Would turn his stare on him as the sun began to rise, as if cataloging every reaction, every emotion that passed through his eyes. And when the last traces of night had left the sky, Andrew would turn wordlessly to the door and lead him back to their room, the touch of a hand on his wrist or the warmth of him against Neil’s back guiding him to sleep.

This morning was the same, Andrews fingers curling familiarly in Neil’s hair, tugging him close enough to nudge his nose against Neil’s, press their lips together, just once. He pulled back and slipped his hand down, fingers hooking on Neil’s frayed collar. Still quiet, but assessing. Confirming, Neil thought, that he was still real, still solid, not some trick of the light.

Satisfied with what he saw, Andrew pushed himself off the ground and, like so many mornings before, led them back to bed.

…

After that morning with the bluebird, Andrew began pointing out others. Not all the time, not in front of the others. But when they were alone and still. No questions asked or answered, just existing quietly, together. There was the thrumming, hollow call of a mourning dove, nesting outside their window. The wren in the rafters of court, too joyful by half for the normal Fox crowd. Even an absurdly crowned little gray thing that had perched outside Andrew’s favorite ice cream shop, a call so unremarkable Neil was skeptical it wasn’t some cleverly disguised camera. A tufted titmouse, Andrew had called it, which did nothing to help its case.

...

“So, are you going to tell me what the bird thing is about?” Neil asked finally, feet up on the dashboard in the Maserati as they headed towards Columbia.

The semester officially over, the Foxes were summarily kicked out of the dorms. The seniors had already said their farewells and headed home, with promises to reunite sometime in the summer. Kevin had elected to stay with Wymack for the first month, then a week or two in Houston with Thea before joining the rest of the Monsters.

Aaron and Nicky had nodded off minutes into the early-morning car journey, the twin leaned against the window with Nicky sprawled half in his lap. Andrew drove with his jaw set, hands gripping the wheel a touch tighter than they needed to. Neil knew what it cost him, agreeing to let Kevin stay with Wymack. Even if their deal was, officially, fulfilled, Kevin was still his, just as surely as the idiots dozing in the back and twice as crisis prone.

But Neil also knew that this was something that Kevin had to do—understood what it meant to need for the one parent you had left, even if Andrew couldn't. But he’d agreed in the end, and that was the important thing.

But agreeing to something in theory and actually leaving him behind were two different matters entirely, and Neil watched as the tension built in Andrew through the night and into the morning, bruised circles blooming underneath his eyes. He’d scoffed when Neil had offered to drive, ripping the keys out of his hand, but he didn’t take it personally. This was something Andrew either could or couldn’t handle, and they'd know the answer soon enough.

But distraction was always on the table, and Neil was bored.

...

Neil knew Andrew had heard him from the slight shift in the set of his shoulders, but the silence stretched out.

“Of which ‘bird thing’ do you speak?” Andrew said, finally. “You’re going to have to be more specific.”

“You know, the thing you do. With the birds.”

Andrew arched an eyebrow.

“You are intentionally being difficult, ‘drew.”

The eyebrow maintained its silence.

Neil rolled his eyes. “How you appear to be on friendly terms with every bird in the greater Palmetto area. Enough to be able to recognize them by call.”

“We didn’t all grow up outside of the public school system, Nealan. Perhaps this is a ‘you’ problem.”

Neil snorted. “Here’s the thing, I tested it out with Nicky the other day. Played him some bird call videos on Youtube. He thought every one was an eagle.” He frowned a little. “I don’t even think eagles sing.”

“That proves nothing. Nicky is an idiot.”

It was Neil’s turn to stare in silence.

Andrew half-turned, considering. “What will you give me for it?”

Neil scoffed. “What’s so secret about birds? Mob ties? Trained assassins? No wait--the birds work for the bourgeoisie." He wheedled at the blonde. "C’mon ‘drew, this is hardly a trade-worthy secret.”

Andrew shrugged. “That depends entirely on your trade.”

Neil sat up straighter in his seat, letting his feet drop to the floor. They didn’t trade secrets often anymore, the things that needed to be shared long unveiled. But they made a game of it, sometimes. Partly for the familiarity of it, more for the endless competitive desire to win the better deal.

“One week of dish duty, and a pint of that sorbet you like from the store. The expensive ones, in the little clear jars.”

Andrew tilted his head, weighing the offer.

“One month and four pints.”

“In your dreams, Minyard. Two weeks and two pints.”

Andrew tipped his hand back and forth in the air, and Neil sighed.

“AND I’ll let you pick the next documentary we watch.”

“Sold.” Andrew smiled then, in his own way. Just a hint of a thing at the corners of his mouth, like laughing aloud on anyone else.

“The answer to your question, young Josten, is that I’ve spend a lot of time near windows.”

Neil narrowed his eyes. “I beg your pardon.”

“Windows, Neil. The tempered glass walls you’re currently surrounded by?”

“I’m familiar with them, yes.”

“Ah, but you aren’t familiar with the windows I am. Say, for instance, those within juvenile detention centers in forested coastal climates. Northern California, for example.”

“Sounds cushy.”

“Wilderness is very good for troubled youth, Neil. All the best books say so.”

“And was it good for you?”

“Not in the slightest. But watching what happened out there was marginally more diverting than what was happening inside. Thus, the birds.”

Neil snorted, but caught how Andrew’s hands had relaxed minutely on the wheel, the slightest drop in tension that confirmed his hunch. Kevin would be fine, but now he knew Andrew would be, too.

“And the songs?”

“Thin walls. A liability for a toddler prison, you’d think.”

Neil cocked his head; a habit Allison had cooed over last time he’d seen her. “That doesn’t explain how you know their names, though.”

“Ah, that would be the sublime funding of the California carceral system. The library was donated by the estate of one Walter Munchausen. Infamous recluse, big into taxidermy, avid birder.”

“Surprised you didn’t go for the taxidermy.”

Andrew turned a level gaze on him. “Who says I didn’t?”

“Is that where you learned about the sparrows and the bluebirds?”

“Correct. Also the birds and the bees. Different book, though.”  

Neil huffed out a laugh. “How many of their songs do you remember?”

Andrew was silent for a moment. “Enough. I was there for a long time.”

Neil considered this. Filed it away. “Alright, ‘drew.”

He patted the dashboard near Andrew’s hand, not quite touching. “As long as you know you’re the prettiest bird of all.”

“I will push you out of this car, junkie.”

…

That summer was the kindest Neil had ever had. There was always hot coffee in the morning, and the sounds of Nicky and Aaron moving about the house, familiar enough to recognize by the tread of their feet. There was a side of the closet that was his, and clothes enough to fill it (though he hadn’t bought any of them, himself). There was exy for the afternoons and game shows at night, movie marathons watched from the floor, bracketed by Andrew’s legs.

And there was Andrew, everywhere. Throwing his feet in Neil’s lap while he read, or tossing Neil’s book away when he was tired of not being paid attention to. Staking a claim with fingers hooked in his collar when someone smiled a little too brightly at Neil at Eden’s. By his side when he fell asleep, a steady warmth when he woke.

It was Andrew’s gentle breathing, his steady heartbeat that colored the start of Neil's days. If it were a nightmare, he’d count the beats until his own pulse steadied to match. If it were a pleasant dream, all the better to wake, knowing that this life he fell into was so much more than anything he could have dreamt.

But the best parts, by far, were the afternoons. Those long, low country afternoons when the mercury stretched beyond 100, and the humidity laid like a blanket against Neil’s skin. Those afternoons where any thoughts of training fell away, and all they could do was stretch out on the back porch, limbs loose and heat-drunk in the hammock Nicky bought as a gag. Together if Andrew could stand it; Neil napping below if not. Either way, able to close their eyes with the knowledge that the other is safe, and close by; free to lose themselves in the haze, the sound of a far-off lawnmower or the lazy crunch of a passing car over gravel.

And occasionally, very occasionally, the sound of a bluebird, nestling in the pines.

[first-and-ten]

Week 17 Recap 2018

PLAYOFFS: Clinched: LAR, NO, KC, LAC, CHI, DAL, NE, SEA, HOU, PHI, BAL, IND Eliminated: OAK, SF, NYJ, JAX, ARI, BUF, DEN, CIN, DET, NYG, TB, ATL, GB, CLE, MIA, WSH, CAR, MIN, PIT, TEN

TD RECORD WATCH: 1: P. Manning - 539 2: D. Brees - 520 3: T. Brady - 517 4: B. Favre - 508

TEAMS THAT SHOULD SIGN COLIN KAEPERNICK: PIT, JAX, MIA, DEN, OAK, TB, NYG, WSH, PHI, SF

NFL Title Belt: CHI defended from MIN (It’s headed to the playoffs!)

DET 31 - 0 GB Game Ball: I wouldn’t have picked the Packers if I knew how little Aaron Rodgers would play $+1 [L]

CAR 33 - 14 NO Game Ball: A rookie QB with the last name Allen $-1 [L]

DAL 36 - 35 NYG Game Ball: Going for 2 just to be petty $-1 [W]

MIA 17 - 42 BUF Game Ball: A rookie QB with the last name Allen $-1 [W]

ATL 34 - 32 TB Game Ball: Each of these teams has fired Mike Smith in the last 5 years $-1 [L]

JAX 3 - 20 HOU Game Ball: David Carr $-3 [W]

NYJ 3 - 38 NE Game Ball: Giving Bowles the sendoff he deserves $+1 [W]

SF 32 - 48 LAR Game Ball: I guess Aaron Donald $+1 [W]

CHI 24 - 10 MIN Game Ball: Running backs in general $+5 [W]

CIN 13 - 16 PIT Game Ball: Cleveland Browns? $-2 [W]

CLE 24 - 26 BAL Game Ball: Tyler Boyd $-2 [W]

ARI 24 - 27 SEA Game Ball: Seabass $-5 [W]

LAC 23 - 9 DEN Game Ball: Defensive 2-pointers $+17 [W]

PHI 24 - 0 WSH Game Ball: Nate Sudfeld (autocorrect wants me to know it’s spelled “sudafed”) $+2 [W]

OAK 3 - 35 KC Game Ball: Pat “50 touchdowns club” Mahomes $-1 [W]

IND 33 - 17 TEN Game Ball: Extra playoff game $+6 [W]

Record this week: 13-3 (7-9 +$15 ATS) Record this season: 159-94-2 (131-116-8 +$18 ATS) Locks record: 59-22 [Survivors: BAL, LAR, CHI, KC, TEN, MIN, NE, PIT, CAR, ATL, NO, LAC, GB, DEN, SEA, CLE, HOU] Underdog record: 20-33-1 2014 pace: 188-67-1 Pickwatch leader: 176-79 (Elliott Harrison, NFL)

[zeroviraluniverse-blog]

For Dodgers and Indians, spring training is about turning the page from their 2017 postseason heartache

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For Dodgers and Indians, spring training is about turning the page from their 2017 postseason heartache

GOODYEAR, Ariz. — The morning after the Cleveland Indians fell to the New York Yankees in the American League Division Series, general manager Mike Chernoff’s fatherly duties took him to a local elementary school to watch his 6-year-old son, Brodie, perform in a first-grade concert. Chernoff’s heart was in the endeavor, but his mind kept flashing back to the Tribe’s 5-2 loss the previous evening and an ending that came far too abruptly for comfort.

“I am sitting there in a fog,” said Chernoff, inadvertently lapsing into the present tense. “I’m enjoying my son’s event. In some ways it’s helpful because you can separate your work life from what’s happening in this amazing moment for your son. But it was hard. It was really hard.”

The defending champs have the best chance at winning this year’s World Series, but a half-dozen rivals have cases for why they can prevent a repeat.

As spring training begins, we identify baseball’s elite — the teams with a chance to compete — and the teams that aren’t even trying to win this year. Where does your squad land?

Rewarding Luis Severino for a breakout season might seem like like the easy call, but manager Aaron Boone has a rotation full of alternatives.

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About 18 miles from Cleveland’s spring training camp in Goodyear, the folks in Dodger Blue know the feeling. Alex Wood, a starter for the National League champions, landed tickets to college football’s national title game between Alabama and his beloved Georgia Bulldogs, and he was counting the downs toward a victory when quarterback Tua Tagovailoa threw a 41-year touchdown pass to DeVonta Smith to pull off a win for the Crimson Tide.

For Wood, a product of the UGA baseball program, the moment wasn’t a fraction as painful as watching the Astros cavort on the Dodger Stadium infield after World Series Game 7. But it did put a crimp in his recovery process.

“That was two tough losses there, not far apart,” Wood said. “I saw the pass go up, and I was like, ‘Aww.’ Then my heart sunk into my stomach when I saw him about 12 yards in front of our D-back. Flip the page, right?”

Talk to players, managers, coaches and baseball executives, and they’ll reflexively tell you that 29 MLB clubs are destined to finish their seasons on a down note because for 29 teams, the season is guaranteed to finish with either a loss or a failure to make the playoffs. The Houston Astros were the lone exception last year, on their way to a cigar-chomping, champagne-spraying celebration and a season-ending parade.

Still, some teams have more reason than others to lament unhappy endings. At the Indians and Dodgers spring camps, the offseason routine made for an emotional tug of war.

“The first week or two are the hardest because you’re just second-guessing everything,” Cleveland infielder Jason Kipnis said. “Anything can happen in a playoff series. You come up short, and you’re like, ‘What changed? Everything worked before. Why did we stop doing this?’ All these questions start coming, but the answer is that no one changed anything. It’s just the game of baseball. It’s a tough-ass game, and it’s hard.

“As players, we’re conditioned to have a short memory and turn the page faster than most people because we usually have a game the next day. Suddenly, there’s no more season to play, and you’re like, ‘What do I do?’ You’re just stuck with memory of the last game or the last series. Once you start to turn the page on that, you finally start getting more excited for the redemption of next season. You learn from your mistakes, absorb it, and you move on.”

The Dodgers, Indians and Astros all won 100 games in 2017. What does history say awaits them in 2018? Of the 23 teams to win 100 games prior to 2017 in the wild card era:

• Five missed the postseason the following season • Seven won 100 games the following season • 19 won 90 games the following season • The 2012 Phillies were the only team to finish .500 or worse (81-81) • The teams had an average win percentage of .589 (a 95-win season) • Two won the World Series and two lost the World Series

Source: ESPN Stats & Information

Flash back to early October, and the outlook was promising for both clubs. The Indians were barely two weeks removed from a 22-game win streak, and they seemed to have all the pieces in place to go the distance and erase the pain of a Game 7 loss to the Cubs in the 2016 World Series.

The Dodgers, who peaked at 91-36 in late August, righted themselves after a late-season wobble and entered the playoffs feeling confident, with a healthy Clayton Kershaw leading the staff and home-field advantage throughout the postseason.

The oddsmakers were on board. At the end of the regular season, the Westgate Las Vegas Super Book gave the Indians 30.8 percent odds to win the World Series, with the Dodgers close behind at 28.6. The Astros, who joined Cleveland and Los Angeles as one of three 100-win teams, were third at 14.3 percent.

But the Astros’ balanced roster and #HoustonStrong karma ultimately prevailed. The Indians took a 2-0 lead in the ALDS, then hit a wall. They batted .171 (28-for-164) against the Yankees and scored five runs in their final three games. Designated hitter Edwin Encarnacion and outfielder Michael Brantley were limited by injuries, and staff ace Corey Kluber absorbed two straight poundings amid whispers of lingering back problems. Four months later, the perpetually stoic Kluber isn’t dropping any hints about his postseason physical limitations.

“I was good enough to pitch,” Kluber said. “I just didn’t get the job done.”

The Dodgers eliminated the Diamondbacks and Cubs in the NL playoffs before losing to Houston in a classic, seven-game World Series. They’re now 30 years removed from Kirk Gibson’s circling the bases in celebration of that momentous World Series homer off Dennis Eckersley.

Players from both teams went back to their everyday lives in the offseason. Kipnis traveled to Maui and Puerta Vallarta for a couple of friends’ weddings. Dodgers third baseman Justin Turner got married and spent his honeymoon with his bride in Dubai. Francisco Lindor, Cleveland’s resident energizer and All-Star shortstop, took part in his traditional offseason workout in Orlando, Florida, with Barry Larkin, Dee Gordon and friends. Lindor arrived in Goodyear with a new look, a searing analysis of his 2017 shortcomings and a strong desire to bring a title to Cleveland.

Edwin Encarnacion and the Indians couldn’t believe their season was over after the 2017 ALDS. Ken Blaze/USA Today Sports

Other players sequestered themselves in their man caves until the fog lifted, mindlessly occupied themselves with household chores or kept tabs on the lack of news among friends on the free-agent market before drifting back into their routines.

“I started back up in the weight room, but mentally, I wasn’t quite there yet,” Dodgers infielder Logan Forsythe said. “That Game 7 loss stuck with me a little bit, but after a while, I just kind of got over it and prepared for next year. Physically, I felt about the same. Mentally, it took a little bit longer.”

Both teams went relatively light on offseason activity. The Indians lost first baseman Carlos Santana, workhorse reliever Bryan Shaw and outfielder Jay Bruce to free agency while adding first baseman Yonder Alonso on a two-year, $16 million deal and signing outfielders Melvin Upton Jr. and Rajai Davis to minor league contracts.

The Dodgers won major creativity points when they shed the salaries of Adrian Gonzalez, Brandon McCarthy and Scott Kazmir and brought back Matt Kemp in a December trade with Atlanta. They spent $2 million on former Marlins starter Tom Koehler, who’ll get a crack at the bullpen role that Brandon Morrow so adeptly filled last season, acquired lefty Scott Alexander from Kansas City and re-signed Chase Utley to a two-year deal.

Players and teams get in gear for Opening Day in Florida and Arizona. • Complete spring training coverage »

Prognosticators are sanguine about the prospects for both teams. Baseball Prospectus’ PECOTA system projects the Dodgers and Astros to win 99 games each, the Indians to come in at 97 wins and the Yankees to win 96 in 2018. No other MLB club is projected to win 90 games.

“When you look at the core, there are guys here who are still on the come and trending in the right direction,” Dodgers manager Dave Roberts said. “The veteran players here are very productive. To force an acquisition or an overhaul doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. I give our front office a lot of credit for standing pat. Not to say we weren’t in on deals, but you have to understand what really makes sense for our organization. We’re very sensitive to that.”

In Cleveland, they’ve experienced enough heartache to distinguish between types of hangovers. In 2016, the Indians played 15 postseason games and knew that everything would end, win or lose, with a Game 7 matchup against the Cubs. Last year, the Indians were pushing and preparing for an ALCS matchup and a possible World Series return when the Yankees crashed the party. Cleveland’s advance scouts suddenly changed their travel plans and came home, and the general manager woke up after Game 5 of the ALDS and attended his son’s school concert.

“You’re going 100 miles an hour because you always think you’re gonna play the next day,” Chernoff said. “Then suddenly you just slam on the brakes and stop.”

Chernoff looks around Cleveland’s camp this spring and sees some players who have yet to fully flush the pain from their systems. But the Indians’ core group has been together a while, and manager Terry Francona will never allow his players to dwell on the negative for very long.

“You don’t see bitterness here,” Chernoff said. “You see motivation and drive.”

The same mindset applies in Los Angeles, where the Dodgers regard 2017 as a springboard as much as they see it as a missed opportunity. Cody Bellinger joined Corey Seager as a budding young star, and Turner, Chris Taylor and Joc Pederson were among the players who performed valiantly in October.

“We left every single ounce of energy and focus we had out there, from the front office down to the coaching staff and players,” Wood said. “There weren’t a lot of regrets in terms of things we could have done differently. The only focus now is looking forward and figuring out how we can finish the drill, so to speak. Losing the World Series is something you won’t forget until you right the ship and finish it out.”

Cactus League games will begin in a few days, and Opening Day is less than six weeks away. For the Indians and Dodgers, looking back in regret is no longer an option.

[first-and-ten]

2017 Week 1 Review

Honestly that was so fulfilling. Is it possible something can break through the apathy of fascism fatigue? Is it possible that that thing is one of the most grossly capitalistic and exploitative pastimes of America? Or am I just happy the Patriots lost?

This week was a bit of a youth movement, it seems that all around the league, young players outclassed older players at QB, RB and WR. Obviously there’s always turnover in the NFL but I honestly think there’s a bit of a generational turnover that’s happening. Or maybe we’re all just finally used to an NFL without Peyton Manning.

TEAMS THAT NEED COLIN KAEPERNICK: Ravens, Browns, Colts, Texans, Jaguars, Bills, Jets, 49ers, Cardinals

Teams on Bye: MIA, TB

KC 42 - 27 NE [L] Game Ball: Alex Smith A fucking fun game to watch. The worst game in terms of points allowed and yards allowed by Bill Belichick’s Pats. Tom Brady was 108-0 in his career when entering the 4th quarter with a lead. Boy was that fun to watch. Now, I’m not gonna say the Patriots aren’t gonna run away with the AFC, but this loss was pretty real. New England was stopped on two 4th-and-shorts where they called bizarrely predictable runs up the middle. They couldn’t get Brady and his pass catchers on the same page. The line didn’t protect him, either. The defense was beyond unimpressive, they crumbled in the last quarter and got completely deflated. Gronk looked slow. I’m sure a lot of this will get fixed, but some of it might take more than a week. Kareem Hunt set the rookie record for yards from scrimmage in a debut game. Alex Smith took shots downfield with ease and success. He almost reached 1/3 of his TD total from last season before this season even really started. I know as a Broncos fan I should be grumpy that the Chiefs won this game, but a) it was a pyrrhic victory as they lost Eric Berry, and b) as a Broncos fan I can’t help but be SO HAPPY the Patriots lost. It just feels good.

JAX 29 - 7 HOU [L] Game Ball: Calais Campbell Lol wouldn’t it be wild if the year that finally nobody thinks the Jaguars will make progress, they actually made progress? More likely, though, the Texans are REALLY bad. They can’t block, they can’t cover, they can’t pass. They can’t seem to get a week 1 starter through the kickoff game ever. I guess Leonard Fournette looks good. Anyway, Houston was maybe a bit distracted.

PHI 30 - 17 WSH [W] Game Ball: Carson Wentz I TOLD YOU Wentz was the new Favre!

NYJ 12 - 21 BUF [L] Game Ball: LeSean McCoy Oop, okay, the Jets are the worst.

OAK 26 - 16 TEN [L] Game Ball: Marshawn Lynch Yeah, he’s back. Yikes. I saw this game as more impressive from the Raiders than disappointing for the Titans, I just got a bit ahead of myself jumping on the Titans bandwagon.

BAL 20 - 0 CIN [L] Game Ball: CJ Mosley Is there anything more humiliating than getting shut out at home by a division rival in the kickoff? Goddamn. I’m not one to overreact but goddamnit can they keep Andy Dalton out there looking like that? Or would AJ McCarron look just as bad behind that line? Baltimore’s defense also is very impressive, but their offense is a concern just like I thought it would be. The loss of Danny Woodhead signals hard times for an already-shaky run game.

ARI 23 - 35 DET [L] Game Ball: Matthew Stafford After Stafford’s first pass was a pick-6 in the red zone it looked like this one would be a strong Arizona win, but in the 4th quarter he extended his record % of fourth quarter comebacks. I still like Arizona’s defense, but the age on their offense was apparent. I think Palmer might be done, which would make this team done too, seeing as David Johnson is gone for at least 10 weeks.  The Lions defense is better than I thought, and their rookie wideout who caught people’s attention in the preseason proved useful on two TD catches.

ATL 23 - 17 CHI [W] Game Ball: Brooks Reed Right down to the wire! Reed sacked Mike Glennon on fourth and goal with no time on the clock. Apparently this was Atlanta’s first win in Chicago since like the the 80s, so... Cool? All in all this was pretty much what I expected: The Bears didn’t roll over, the Falcons defense carried them as their offense sputtered from a lack of creativity. Tarik Cohen got over 100 yards, so that’s a thing I guess?

PIT 21 - 18 CLE [W] Game Ball: Antonio Brown Brown was all over the field keeping Pittsburgh from falling into the trap game. They got a TD before running an offensive snap after blocking and returning Cleveland’s first punt attempt. From there, though, it was a bit of a slog. Told you this offense could take a little time to get going. And that Cleveland might not be their usual pushover selves.

IND 9 - 46 LAR [W] Game Ball: Wade Phillips and Cooper Kupp The Rams scored me so many fantasy points. The Colts had to put Jacoby Brissett in the game, after saying he wouldn’t play this week because he didn’t know the playbook. Why would Tolzien even try when you basically just said you’ve replaced him? And how can you turn around then and put Brissett in? What a disaster. The Rams offense also looked incredible, by the way. Not good, incredible. I’ll be fascinated to see how well they can do going forward, this is a game that can’t be taken too seriously but it’s not crazy to think that Goff, Cooper Kupp, Sammy Watkins, and Sean McVey have this thing going. The thing that should be worrisome is that this high score (yeah, the Rams lead the NFL in points right now) is partly a product of not being able to salt away the game with runs.

SEA 9 - 17 GB [L] Game Ball: Aaron Rodgers Welp, I was wrong. After an entire half of stalemate, Aaron Rodgers once again willed his team to victory, with some help from the zebras. Not a ton, but some.  The o-line is a mess again. I can’t believe we are back here, in week one, talking about how the bad line play could be the Seahawks’ undoing. I mean obviously it won’t, but jesus, can we fix this shit in the offseason some time instead of in week 6 every year?  Awesome work by both defenses, somehow. If Green Bay is finally in a position to keep teams to less than 28 points per game, look out NFL.

CAR 23 - 3 SF [W] Game Ball: Cam Newton Don't be fooled by the late FG, this was a shutout. At home, in a Shanahan coaching debut. Ugly shit. Nobody could take advantage of Carolina’s secondary. Cam played from the pocket a lot, which doesn't really surprise me but was... Odd to see. I think this offense is still taking shape.

NYG 3 - 19 DAL [W] Game Ball: Dak Prescott Ugh, yawn.  Guys, you really have to pay Odell now. He is your entire offense. Your D bailed your ass out so hard, this game should have been 35-0. You almost made Brandon Marshall go a full game without a catch for the first time since his rookie year. This is the dude who caught 21 balls in one game once, and ostensibly your #1 receiver! You can’t run the ball for shit, and it’s equal parts bad blocking, bad play design, and lack of air threat. Giants, I hate you for letting the Cowboys be the Cowboys again. I just have to hope the Broncos can do better, especially with Orlando Scandrick out. We can’t have the Dallas D looking good because they get to open against two of the most dysfunctional o-lines in the league.

NO 19 - 29 MIN [L] Game Ball: Dalvin Cook Still not sure whether I can bring myself to root fully for New Orleans this season. Their defense still looked awful, allowing Sam Bradford to pull and Alex Smith and suddenly look awesome (though statistically he did have an incredible year in 2016 as well.) I will say, it was kinda great seeing Dalvin Cook break AP’s franchise record for yards gained in a rookie debut, while Peterson looked on from the bench. I don’t even know what’s going on there, because given the Saints’ history there’s an equal chance that Sean Payton played it right and knew how to maximize his run game and just didn’t have enough touches because they fell behind, or that he just vindictively denied AP his revenge game, or that he just kinda forgot that he had a future first-ballot HOF RB sitting on the bench ready to run angry. Either way, beautiful stuff. Boring ass game though.

LAC 21 - 24 DEN [W] Game Ball: Trevor Siemian Broncos week 1 2012: Peyton Manning’s return proves thrilling as the Steelers’ late would-be-game-winning drive is ended by a Tracy Porter pick Broncos week 1 2013: Manning is the first player in decades to throw 7 TDs in a game as the Broncos get revenge on the Ravens  Broncos week 1 2014: After giving Denver fits with his legs, Andrew Luck’s last-minute would-be-game-winning drive is ended by a 4th down pass deflection by rookie CB Bradley Robey Broncos week 1 2015: In a hardcore defensive battle with 0 offensive touchdowns, former Ravens safety Darian Stewart intercepts Joe Flacco in the end zone to prevent the go-ahead touchdown in the final seconds Broncos week 1 2016: Hosting the Panthers for a Super Bowl rematch, the Broncos win despite giving Carolina FG position on penalties in the final seconds because Kubiak ices Graham Gano’s kick Broncos week 1 2017: After leading by 17 in the 4th quarter, the Broncos give up 14 points in less than 2 minutes thanks to questionable turnovers and only hang on to beat the LA Chargers in a double-coaching-debut by once again icing a kicker, this time a rookie You can’t say the Broncos don’t entertain. I can’t quite believe how many plays we pulled on Joey Bosa. Siemian continues to impress, as does CJ Anderson. That interception came on pass interference, but then again the Chargers had a brutal dropped INT early so I guess it’s just karma. Offensive line held up remarkably well until Ronald Leary went down, watching his health this week with bated breath. 

Record this week: 7-8 Record this season: 7-8 Locks record: 2-1 (Survivors used: ATL) Upsets record: 1-3 2014 pace: 9-7 Pickwatch leader: 13-2 (Jack Jorgensen, Fansided)

NFL Title Belt: LAR (won from IND) DSA (Dos Shula Award for not losing) candidates: KC, BUF, ATL, BAL, PIT, DET, JAX, OAK, PHI, LAR, GB, CAR, DAL, MIA, TB, DEN MMA (Matt Millen Award for not winning) candidates: NE, NYG, CHI, CIN, CLE, ARI, HOU, TEN, WSH, IND, SEA, SF, NYG, MIA, TB, LAC

The Room Where It Happens: N/A Fallen Tributes: N/A

FANTASY CORNER

Danger Squirrels 124 - 142.5 Toilet City Browns [L, 0-1]

Some clear missteps here: I should have started Melvin Gordon over CJ Anderson, but Martellus Bennett as my TE and swapped Greg Olsen for Jonathan Stewart. But how was I to know that Stewart’s production would be unaffected by Christian McCaffrey, or that Olsen would inexplicably disappear from a passing attack that usually centers around him, or that Melvin Gordon would get a passing TD and Trev would steal CJ’s? And damn the Giants defense for doing okay real-world-wise but crap for fantasy. My opponent left Randall Cobb’s points on the bench but was solid enough across the roster to overcome Jimmy Graham’s dud week. This is the dude I tied with for the championship last year, so this one makes me grumpy.

Siemian the Finals 161.96 - 127.78 The Papists [W, 1-0]

I would fret about having left CJ Procise in for Randall Cobb and not getting Stafford’s big day on the board, but as you can see my opponent left Jay Ajayi in his lineup and my defense outscored his top two performers combined. I’ll take it.