#i kinda got really excited about this idea oops

[joelmillerisapunk]

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Dbf!Joel Miller x f!reader

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Wordcount: 7,103 - oops

Summary: When Joel accidentally stumbles upon your only fans he convinces himself he's only subscribing to help you through college. And then you send him his top-tier subscriber personal video and he's fucked because you don't even know it's him your dad's best friend.

Warnings: 18+, reader has an only fans, unprotected p in v, f!andm! oral receiving, age gap (at least 10 years), reader is in her 20's, alcohol consumption, there's a dick pic, reader posts nudes of herself on her OF so if you do not like that please scroll awaaaaaay thanks <3 two consenting adults.

Notes: I listened to Espresso by Sabrina Carpenter a hundred too many times and couldn't sleep on this random idea. I got carried away, this was supposed to be a short one-shot and then I fell in love and married the idea so here we are. Tysm @saradika-graphics for the divider.

Joel’s never been on a site like this.

But his best buddy's enthusiasm was infectious. Convincing him that it's all the hype, ‘You should see the women on there man.’ So, after a long day at work, followed by a shower, he is perched in front of his computer, the screen's glow illuminating his skepticism. 

With a deep breath, he navigates to the website, his fingers poised hesitantly over the keys. He starts scrolling through the front page, taking in the various content that is being shared. It's all very different from anything he's ever seen before, but he can see why his friend is so excited about it. 

As he continues scrolling Joel's eyes widen in surprise. There you are right on the front page, not too far from the top, his friend's daughter, exuding confidence in a bikini and a sexy little pose, the very picture of carefree youth. 

Denial is his first reaction as he quickly minimises the page, not believing he just saw that. It couldn't have been you. No way. But curiosity, that relentless beast, coaxes him back to the screen. The second glance confirms it; it's undeniably you, and the realization sends a jolt through him. He clicks on your profile, the rabbit hole beckoning.

His heart races as he sees more and more photos of you. Wearing lingerie in some of them, and bikinis in others, but never anything less. Then he finds the section with your paid content, looming like a forbidden fruit. The greyed-out thumbnails tease his imagination. He notices that he has to pay to see them and his mind races. What kinda stuff you got hidin’ here pretty girl?

Joel stops for a moment, unsure if he should really pay to see hidden content but before he can talk himself out of it, he enters his payment information, the justification that he is supporting you echoes hollowly in his mind. He clicks "subscribe." As soon as he does, the greyed-out photos become clear, and Joel's eyes widen in shock. He can't believe what he's seeing. You, completely naked, posing in a way that leaves nothing to the imagination. 

He feels a mix of emotions - excitement, guilt, confusion. He knows he shouldn't be looking at these photos, but he can't help himself. He tells himself that it's just for a few minutes, just to see what's there. That he's just being curious, that he's just supporting you. But deep down, he knows that's not the whole truth and he knows that he'll be coming back to these photos again and again.

For now, though, he tells himself that it's okay. He's just satisfying his curiosity, and he's supporting his friend's daughter at the same time. He tells himself that it's a win-win situation, and he settles back in his chair to enjoy the photos.  But as he scrolls through the photos, he can feel himself getting more and more aroused. He starts to rub his cock through his pants, and before long, he's jerking off to the images on the screen. knowing that he's doing something wrong but unable to stop himself.

Just as he's about to come, he gets a message from the website. It's from you, and you're thanking him for subscribing to the highest tier, where he gets a personal video from you. 

Joel's heart races as he reads the message, wondering if you know it's him. But as he reads on, he realizes that you don't. You're just being friendly, asking him what he'd like to see you do or say in a personal video.

Joel pauses, wrestling with the decision. The offer is tantalizing, and he can feel the pull of his curiosity. He rationalizes that it's merely a harmless video, an extra indulgence. With a mix of excitement and trepidation, he convinces himself that there's no harm in satisfying his curiosity just this once. 

Joel takes a deep breath and types out a reply to you, asking if you could wear a school girl uniform in the video. He feels a twinge of guilt for asking, but he can't help being curious what you would look like in one and how he would feel bending you over his knee in one.

—

A few days later, Joel receives a notification that his personal video is ready to be viewed. He takes his time, feeling guilty all over again but evidently he clicks on the link and waits for the video to load.

When the video starts, he's greeted with the sight of you, wearing a plaid skirt and a white blouse, looking as sexy as ever. You start to unbutton your blouse, revealing a lacy bra underneath. Joel feels his face flush with heat as he watches you, his heart pounding in his chest.You continue to tease him, running your fingers through your hair and biting your lower lip. Joel can feel himself getting more and more aroused, his cock straining against his pants.

Finally, you slip out of your skirt and bra, revealing your naked body underneath. Joel watches in amazement as you pose. And if that wasn't enough then you started talking to him, looking directly into the camera and speaking in a sultry voice. "Hi there, cowboy," you say, a playful smile on your lips. "I hope you're enjoying the video so far. I know I'm enjoying making it for you."

You run your hands over your body, caressing your breasts and your hips. "Do you like what you see?" you ask, your voice dripping with suggestion. "I've been thinking about you. Wondering what you're doing right now. Are you touching yourself? Are you thinking about me?"

You lean closer to the camera, your eyes sparkling with mischief. "I've been thinking about you too, baby. Wondering what it would be like to be with you. To feel your hands on my body."

You sit down on a black spinning chair, manoeuvring your legs so youre on full display for the camera, your fingers find your clit. "I'm so wet for you, daddy.” You moan out.

You start to touch yourself in earnest, your fingers moving faster and faster. "M’so close," you say, your breath coming in short gasps. "I want you to come with me. I want you to feel what I'm feeling. I want you to come for me daddy."

You throw your head back and moan, your body shudders with pleasure. "Yes, daddy. Yes! I'm coming so hard for you."

As the video comes to an end, you look back at the camera, your eyes shining with satisfaction. "I hope you enjoyed that, cowboy, can't wait to see what we do next.”

As the video comes to an end, Joel can't believe what he's just witnessed. He feels his orgasm building up inside of him, and before he knows it, he's coming in his pants - just from watching you. 

As he looks back at the screen, he sees that there's a message waiting for him from you. You're thanking him for watching the video and asking if he enjoyed it. Damn you're quick with these messages. He didn't even know you could tell he watched it.

He stares at the screen for a moment unsure what to say 

cowboy_jm: Yeah, I really enjoyed it. Thanks for making it for me darlin. 

He hits send, feeling so awkward and out of his element. He hasn't flirted with another woman in ages and the fact you're at least ten years younger than him doesn't make it any easier. 

A few moments later, he gets a reply from you.

you: I'm glad you enjoyed it, cowboy 😘 I had a lot of fun making it for you. Do you want to see more?

He shouldn't, he should just shut his computer down and cancel the membership later. But he can't, he can't help himself.

cowboy_jm: Yeah, I'd like that.

You send him a picture, and he feels his heart race as he opens it. It's a selfie of you, wearing the plaid skirt and white blouse from the video, with a playful smile on your lips. 

you: Here's a little something extra for you, cowboy. I hope you like it. 😏

You can't do this for every top tier subscriber, could you? Then again the price tag did promise a lot more than the others did. Maybe not a lot of people were desperate enough to need to be talked up by a pretty little thing like you. But damn was he enjoying it. 

cowboy_jm: Wow, you look absolutely stunning in that outfit. I could get used to seeing you like this. 

You: Oh, I bet you could. 😉 You know, I've always wanted to ride a cowboy... or his horse.

Joel feels his face flush with heat as he reads your message. He can't believe you just said that, but he's also incredibly turned on. He's never had a conversation like this before, but he's finding that he really enjoys it.

cowboy_jm: Well, I'm sure we can work something out. I've got a pretty big horse.

you: Oh, I bet you do. I've always been a fan of big horses. Maybe one day I'll get to ride yours.

cowboy_jm: You can ride my horse anytime you want, darlin'. I promise you won't be disappointed.

you: I can't wait. 

As the conversation comes to a close, Joel feels a sense of dread wash over him. He knows he's made a mistake. He tells himself that he'll figure something out later.

—

As you close your laptop, a thrill of excitement runs through you. The conversation has been so thrilling, so charged with flirtation and innuendo. You can tell whoever is behind this cowboy profile is probably a little older and not too experienced on a site like this. 

You decide to do a little more digging before sending him anything else. You navigate to his profile, curious to learn more about this mysterious cowboy who's captured your interest. As you scroll through his vague faceless pictures and read his bio, your heart skips a beat. The realization hits you like a ton of bricks: "cowboy_jm" is none other than Joel Miller, your dad's best friend. The one coming over tomorrow for a BBQ

The shock is palpable. You've known Joel your entire life. He's been a constant presence at family barbecues, holiday gatherings, and birthday parties. The thought of him seeing your content, let alone subscribing to your highest tier, is both mortifying and exhilarating. You can't help but feel a twinge of guilt, but it's quickly overshadowed by a surge of mischievous excitement. The idea of playing a game with Joel, of having this secret, is too tempting to pass up. You decide to have a little fun with the situation. After all, he's the one who's been flirting with you, who's been watching your videos and messaging you. You tell yourself that he's a willing participant in this little charade.

With a playful smile, you decide to up the ante. You want to see just how far Joel is willing to go. You open up your messaging app and start typing.

you: Hey cowboy, I was just trying to get to sleep but need a little help. How about how about you send me a little something? 😉

You hit send and wait for his response. You know you're playing with fire, but you can't help yourself. You want to see if he's really as adventurous as he's been pretending to be. As you wait for his reply, you can't help but feel a sense of power. You're in control of this situation, and you're going to enjoy every minute of it. You know you should probably feel guilty for manipulating Joel like this, but the thrill of the game is too intoxicating.

Finally, your notifications go off, and you see a new message from Joel. You take a deep breath and open it.

cowboy_jm: Oh? And what did you have in mind, darlin'?

you: Well, I was thinking... maybe you could send me a little something to hold me over until I can have that ride. 😉

You hold your breath, waiting for his response. You're not sure if he'll go for it, but you're hoping he will.

cowboy_jm: I don't know, darlin'. I'm not sure if that's such a good idea.

you: Oh, come on, cowboy. I promise I'll make it worth your while. 😏

cowboy_jm: Well, I suppose I could make an exception... just this once.

You feel a surge of excitement as you read his message. You can't believe he's actually going to do it!

cowboy_jm: But you have to promise me something, darlin'. You have to promise that this stays between us. I don't want anyone else seein’

what I'm about to send you.

you: Oh, I promise. I won't tell a soul. 😉

cowboy_jm: Alright, darlin'. Here it is. 😘

As you gaze at the image Joel has sent, your breath hitches in your throat. The sight of his cock is both surprising and incredibly arousing. It's clear that he's not a young man, the maturity of his body is evident in the thick, veined shaft that stands proudly in the photo. The girth of it makes your fingers twitch with the desire to touch it, to feel its weight in your hands.

The skin is a rich, deep pink, stretched taut over the hardness beneath. The head is broad and flushed with a deeper hue, a bead of moisture glistening at the tip, hinting at his arousal and the urgency of his need. You can't help but imagine how it would feel inside you, filling you completely, the friction of his thrusts igniting a fire within your core.

You can't deny the beauty of his cock. It's a testament to his virility, to the raw, primal power that he possesses. The soft, dark and grey hair at the base contrasts with the smoothness of the shaft, adding to the visual feast before your eyes.

You feel a warmth spreading through your body, a heat that pools between your legs as you continue to admire the photo. The thought of having such a magnificent cock at your disposal, of being able to pleasure and be pleasured by it, sends a shiver of anticipation down your spine.

Taking a moment to compose yourself, you type out a response 

you: Wow, cowboy. You didn't have to send me something so... impressive. 😏 you've definitely exceeded my expectations. I can't wait to see it in person.

You hit send before you can second-guess yourself, the thrill of the forbidden fueling your boldness. You know you're playing a dangerous game, but the allure of the unknown, the promise of untold pleasures, is too potent to resist.

As you wait for his reply, you can't help but touch yourself, your fingers slipping beneath the waistband of your panties to find the slickness that has gathered there. You imagine it's his hand, his fingers expertly coaxing you towards release, and the thought is enough to make you moan softly into the quiet of your room.

cowboy_jm: I'm looking forward to it too, darlin'. More than you know.

You can sense the anticipation in his messages, and it matches your own. 

you: Well, I better let you go, cowboy. I've got a lot to do before bed. But I'll be thinking about you... and your impressive horse. 😉

cowboy_jm: Haha, I'll be thinking about you too, darlin'. Take care, and I'll see you soon.

As the evening winds down, Joel finds himself unable to shake the conversation from his mind. The image of you in that schoolgirl outfit, the sound of your voice as you called him 'daddy', the thrill of exchanging messages with you—it all feels like a dream, a forbidden fantasy come to life. He tries to focus on other things, but his thoughts keep drifting back to you.

The next day, Joel wakes up with a sense of nervous anticipation. He's supposed to go over to your dad's house and the thought of it sends a jolt of adrenaline coursing through his veins. He tries to push the thoughts of your online interactions out of his mind as he gets ready, reminding himself that he's just going over to hang out with his friend. But the image of you in that plaid skirt keeps creeping back into his thoughts, making it hard for him to concentrate on anything else.

—

As he pulls into the driveway, he takes a deep breath, steeling himself for what's to come. He walks up to the front door, his heart pounding in his chest. Your dad greets him with a firm handshake and a warm smile, completely oblivious to the secret between his best friend and his daughter. When he walks in he notices you're nowhere in sight, and can't decide if he's relieved or disappointed.

Your dad and Joel make small talk for a few minutes before your dad excuses himself to take a phone call, leaving Joel alone in the living room. And as if on queue you walk into the room with a confident stride, wearing the same plaid skirt from the video and a tight-fitting white blouse. You greet him with a playful smile, your eyes twinkling with mischief

"Hey, Joel," you say, your voice dripping with sweetness. "Can I get you something to drink?”

Joel feels his face flush with heat as he tries to maintain his composure. "Hey there, darlin', uh sure," he replies, trying to keep his voice steady. "You're looking... very nice today.”

You giggle and do a little twirl, the skirt flaring out slightly to give him a glimpse of your thighs. "Why, thank you," you say, batting your eyelashes at him. "You're looking pretty good yourself.”

Before he can say anything else you walk over to the fridge and bend over to grab a couple of drinks, your skirt rides up to reveal a glimpse of your bare pussy, so perfect and fuckable.

You hand him a beer and wink at him, your lips curling into a seductive smile. "Enjoy the view?”

Joel takes the beer from you, his hand shaking slightly. He can feel his heart pounding in his chest, his mind filled with images of you from the videos and the messages you've exchanged. He knows that he should excuse himself, that he should leave before things go any further, but he can't seem to tear himself away from you.

Just then, your father walks back into the room, oblivious to the tension between you. "Hey, Joel," he says, clapping him on the back. "I'm glad you could make it. Let's head out to the backyard. I've got the grill fired up.”

Joel nods and follows him outside, grateful for the distraction. 

As the afternoon sun casts a warm glow over the backyard, Joel tries to focus on the conversation at hand, but his gaze keeps drifting back to you. The skirt you're wearing teases him with its familiarity, a tangible reminder of the illicit videos he's watched late at night, alone in the darkness of his room. The way the fabric swishes around your thighs as you move—it's enough to make his head spin and his heart race in his chest.

You seem to revel in his discomfort, your eyes sparkling with mischief every time you catch him staring. You're the perfect picture of innocence and seduction, flipping burgers on the grill, laughing at your dad's corny jokes, all the while subtly taunting Joel with your every move.

With each playful glance, each coy smile, you're pulling him deeper into your web, ensnaring him with the promise of forbidden pleasures. And Joel, for all his attempts at normalcy, can't help but be drawn in.

He reaches for another beer, the cool bottle a welcome relief from the heat that seems to be building inside him. The alcohol loosens his inhibitions, making it easier to laugh at your dad's anecdotes, to join in on the conversation, even as his mind is elsewhere, consumed by thoughts of you.

As night approaches and the drinks continue flowing, your dad’s found his limit. He stands up from his lawn chair with a contented sigh. "Well, I think it's time for this old man to hit the hay," he announces, stretching his arms above his head. "You two kids have fun, but not too much fun, alright? Make sure you take the guestroom Joel."

You flash him a cheeky grin, the corners of your eyes crinkling with amusement. "Don't worry, Dad. We'll be good," you assure him, your gaze flicking briefly to Joel, who's suddenly found something incredibly interesting on the bottom of his beer bottle.

As your dad disappears into the house, the air between you and Joel grows charged with anticipation. The playful banter, the secret glances traded throughout the evening have led to this moment, where the unspoken promise of something more hangs heavy in the air.

The stars above twinkle with a knowing light, as if privy to the secret that simmers just beneath the surface. The night, once a backdrop to a casual gathering, now feels like an intimate cocoon, sheltering the two of you from the outside world.

Joel, with his guard lowered by the evening's camaraderie and the remnants of alcohol in his system, finds himself adrift in the sea of your gaze. The laughter and casual conversation that filled the air earlier has given way to silence.

You lean back in your chair, your eyes locked on Joel's and a mischievous smile paints your lips. "You know, Joel," you say, your voice low and teasing, "I've been thinking about our little chat yesterday."

Joel's heart skips a beat. "Oh? And what chat would that be, darlin'?" he asks, trying to keep his voice steady.

You lean forward, your eyes sparkling with excitement. "The one where you told me all about your - impressive horse," you say, your voice dripping with innuendo.

Joel nearly chokes on his beer, caught off guard by your boldness. He coughs and sputters, his face turning a shade of red that has nothing to do with the alcohol. "I... uh... “he stammers, his eyes darting nervously in the direction of the house. Joel feels the color drain from his face, his palms growing sweaty. He had hoped that the anonymity of the internet would keep his secret safe, but now, as he looks into your knowing eyes, he realizes that you've seen right through him this entire time. "I... uh... I'm not sure what you're talkin’ about," he stammers, his gaze darting nervously around the backyard.

You laugh, a soft, melodic sound that sends a shiver down Joel's spine. "Oh, come on, cowboy," you say, using his nickname on the site. "You don't have to be so shy about it."

Joel's eyes widen in shock, and he feels his face flush with heat. "How did you-?" he begins, but you cut him off with a wave of your hand.

"Let's just say I have my ways," you reply, your smile widening. "what's the matter? You look like you've seen a ghost.”

Joel runs a hand through his hair, his mind reeling. He had never imagined that his online interactions with you would spill over into the real world, and he's not sure how to handle the situation. "I just... I didn't think you knew it was me," he admits.

You lean back in your chair, your gaze never leaving his. "Well, I did some digging, and let's just say your profile picture was a bit of a giveaway," you say, a hint of amusement in your voice.

Joel feels his face grow even hotter, if that's possible. He had been so careful, so cautious, and yet, here he is, exposed and vulnerable.

"What's the matter, Joel? Scared?" 

“It's not that, darlin'," he replies, his voice barely above a whisper. "It's just... complicated."

"Life's complicated, cowboy," you say, your voice steady and sure. "But sometimes, you've just got to take the reins and ride it out.”

Before he can respond, you stand up and extend your hand towards him, a silent invitation to follow you into the unknown. Joel hesitates for a moment, his mind racing with the potential consequences of what he's about to do and what you could possibly be offering. But in the end, desire wins out over caution, and with a resigned sigh, he places his hand in yours.

You lead him through the quiet house, your footsteps muffled by the plush carpeting. As you reach the guest room, you pause and turn to face him, your hand resting on the doorknob.

"This is where you'll be sleeping tonight, cowboy," you say, your voice barely above a whisper. "But remember, I'm just down the hall if you need anything.” 

With that, you give him a playful wink and disappear down the hallway, leaving him standing there, his heart pounding and his mind filled with images of what he thought was going to happen and what might happen if he takes you up on your offer.

—

The next morning, Joel wakes up with a slight headache, the sunlight streaming in through the curtains. He sits up in bed, rubbing his temples, and tries to piece together the events of the previous night. His mind is foggy from the alcohol, but the memory of you in that skirt is crystal clear.

He gets up and stumbles out of the guest room, his bare feet padding against the cool hardwood floor. He's still half-asleep, his thoughts are muddled and disoriented, and in his groggy state, he accidentally turns the wrong way down the hallway.

Before he knows what's happening, he finds himself standing in the doorway of your bedroom. The door is slightly ajar, and through the crack, he can see you lying on the bed, your legs spread wide, your hand buried between your thighs. You're completely lost in the moment, your eyes are closed and your lips are parted in a silent moan. You're wearing a thin pair of panties. 

Joel's heart stops in his chest as he watches you, his breath catches in his throat. He knows he should turn around and leave, but he can't seem to tear himself away. He's transfixed by the sight of you, the way your body moves, the soft, needy sounds you make as you touch yourself.

And then, as if sensing his presence, your eyes flutter open. For a moment, you just stare at him, your gaze filled with surprise and desire. But instead of stopping, instead of pushing him away, you moan his name, your voice husky and full of need.

“Joel," you whisper, your fingers still moving in slow, deliberate circles. "I've been waiting for you."

Joel feels a jolt of electricity shoot through his body, his cock hardening in his boxers. He steps into the room, his movements slow and hesitant, and you beckon him closer with a curl of your finger.

"Come here, cowboy," you purr, pulling your panties to the side to give him a better view.

Joel's mind is a whirlwind of emotions as he steps toward the bed, his body acting on instinct despite the lingering doubts in his mind. He's acutely aware of the line he's about to cross, yet, the sight of you, so wanton and unashamed, is an irresistible siren call that he cannot ignore.

He reaches the edge of the bed, his eyes locked on the intimate display before him. The scent of your arousal fills the air, a heady perfume that makes his head spin. He watches as you continue to pleasure yourself, your fingers dancing over your clit with practiced ease, your hips bucking in response to your own touch.

"Touch me, Joel," you beg, your voice trembling with need. "I need to feel you inside me.”

Joel swallows hard, his hands shaking as he reaches out to touch you. His fingers graze your inner thigh, the skin soft and warm beneath his touch. With a gentleness that belies the hunger in his eyes, Joel slides your panties down your legs, exposing you fully to his gaze. He takes a moment to appreciate the sight before him—your pussy glistening with arousal.

Joel positions himself between your thighs, his gaze never leaving yours as he lowers his head to taste you. The first touch of his tongue to your heated core elicits a sharp gasp from you, your body arching off the bed in response to the sudden sensation.

"Oh, God, Joel," you moan, your fingers tangling in his hair as he begins to explore you with his mouth. His tongue traces the contours of your pussy, each stroke sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body.

He takes his time, savoring the taste of you, the feel of your body responding to his touch. His hands slide under your hips, pulling you closer, his tongue delving deeper into your depths. You can feel the tension building inside you, a coil of desire winding tighter with each passing moment.

"You taste so fuckin good, darlin'," Joel growls, his voice muffled by your flesh. He can feel your body trembling beneath him, your moans growing louder and more insistent as he continues his ministrations.

You're lost in a sea of sensation, your world narrowed down to the relentless rhythm of his tongue and the feel of his hands on your body. "I'm close, Joel," you gasp, your body tensing as the first waves of your orgasm begin to crest. "So close..."

With a final flick of his tongue, Joel sends you tumbling over the edge. Your body convulses as the orgasm rips through you, your muscles clenching around his tongue as you cry out his name. The pleasure is almost too much to bear, a white-hot surge of ecstasy that leaves you breathless and shaking.

As the aftershocks subside, Joel crawls up the bed to lie beside you, his body humming with need. You turn to face him, your eyes heavy-lidded with satisfaction, a sated smile playing on your lips. "That was... perfect," you murmur, your hand reaching down to stroke his rock-hard erection through his boxers. "But now it's your turn, cowboy."

Before Joel can respond, you're pushing him onto his back and deftly pulling down his boxers to free his straining cock. You lean down to take him in your mouth, your tongue swirling around the head of his cock, your hand pumping the shaft in time with your movements. Joel groans, his hands fist the sheets as you work your magic on him. He can feel the pressure building in his balls, the telltale tingling that signals the approach of his orgasm. "Fuck, darlin'," he grunts, his body tensing. 

“You're gonna make me come.”

You pull back, releasing him from your mouth with a wet pop. "Not yet," you say, a wicked gleam in your eye. "Wanna take that ride.” You straddle him, your hand guiding his cock to your entrance. You sink down onto him with a moan and your body stretches to accommodate his girth. Joel grips your hips, his eyes locked with yours as you begin to ride him, your movements are slow and deliberate.

The sensation of being inside you is almost too much for Joel. He can feel every inch of your tight, wet pussy as you move on top of him, your breasts bouncing with each thrust. "You feel so fucking good, darlin', so fuckin good,” he groans as his hands move to cup your breasts.

You lean forward letting your lips brush against his ear. "I want you to fuck me, Joel," you whisper, your voice thick with desire. "Fuck me like you've been dreaming of."

With a low growl, Joel flips you onto your back, his body covering yours as he drives into you with deep, powerful strokes. You wrap your legs around his waist, your fingers dig into his back as he pounds into you, the sound of flesh meeting flesh echoes through the room.

"Yes, Joel, yes!" you cry out as your body arches off the bed. "Harder, fuck me harder!"

Joel obliges, his hips snapping forward with renewed vigor, each thrust pushes you closer and closer to the edge. And then, with a final, brutal thrust, you're both coming, your bodies shudder in unison as you ride out the waves of your orgasms. 

As the last spasms of pleasure wrack your bodies, Joel collapses on top of you, his breath coming in ragged gasps. You lie there for a moment, basking in the afterglow, your bodies still intimately connected. Then, with a playful grin, you nudge him with your hip. "So, cowboy, how was that ride for you?"

Joel lifts his head and his eyes meet yours. A slow smile spreads across his face. "Darlin'," he drawls, "that was the best ride of my life."

You laugh, the sound light and carefree. "I'm glad you enjoyed it as much as I did. We should probably get cleaned up before my dad wakes up."

Reluctantly, Joel pulls out of you and rolls onto his back. You sit up, stretching your arms above your head, and then climb out of bed. You pad over to your dresser and pull out a pair of clean panties and an outfit, then turn to face Joel.

"Coming?" you ask, cocking an eyebrow at him.

Joel grins and gets out of bed, his eyes roaming over your body. "Yes, ma'am," he says, saluting you with a mock-serious expression.

You both head to the bathroom, where you shower. As Joel steps under the spray of hot water, you take a moment to drink in the sight of him. The water cascades down his broad shoulders, tracing the contours of his muscular back and flowing over the firm swell of his ass. You allow your gaze to travel back up to his face, watching as the water beads on his skin, runs down the sharp angles of his jaw, and drips from the tips of his lashes.

Joel turns, his movements languid and unhurried. The water washes over his chest, highlighting the definition of his muscles and the ridges of his abdomen. A smattering of greying hair adorns his chest, trailing down his stomach to form a line that disappears beneath the water. His cock, still semi-hard from your earlier escapades, rests against his thigh.

For a moment, you're lost in the sheer masculine beauty of him. He's not a young man, but there's a timeless quality to his physique, a sense of strength and resilience that transcends age. You can't help the surge of attraction to him like a primal pull.

Joel catches you staring and a slow, knowing smile spreads across his face. "See somethin you like, darlin'?" he drawls, his voice thick with amusement.

You feel a flush of heat creep into your cheeks, but you refuse to look away. "Maybe I do," you retort, your gaze locked with his. "Do you have a problem with that, cowboy?"

Joel chuckles. "No problem at all, feel free to look your fill."

You step forward and reach out to trace the line of hair that bisects his chest. His skin is warm and slick beneath your fingers, the muscle beneath firm and unyielding. 

Joel's smile fades, replaced by a look of intense concentration as he watches you explore his body. Encouraged by his reaction, you drop to your knees in front of him, your hands sliding over the wet skin of his hips. Joel's breath hitches as you lean forward and press a kiss to his stomach, just above the line of hair that leads to his rapidly hardening cock.

You look up at him, your eyes filled with a mixture of innocence and lust. "I want to taste you, Joel," you whisper, your voice barely audible over the sound of the running water. "I want to feel you in my mouth."

Joel groans, his hands tangling in your wet hair as he guides you closer. His cock is fully erect now, the head flushed with arousal and beaded with moisture. You part your lips and take him into your mouth, the taste of him mingling with the clean, fresh scent of the soap.

Joel's hips jerk in response to the sensation, his fingers tightening in your hair. "Fuck, such a good girl for this ol’cowboy.”

You hum in acknowledgment, the vibration sending a shudder through his body. You can feel his control slipping, his movements becoming more erratic as you work him. With each stroke of your tongue, each suckling kiss, you're pushing him closer and closer to the edge.

"I'm gonna come, darlin'," Joel warns, his voice strained. "If you don't want to swallow, you better pull back now."

You respond by taking him deeper, your hands gripping his ass as you suck him with renewed vigor. Joel's control snaps, his body tensing as he erupts in your mouth. You swallow reflexively, the salty-sweet taste of his release filling your senses.

As the last spasms of his orgasm subside, Joel pulls you to your feet and captures your lips in a searing kiss. 

As the water from the shower begins to cool, Joel reaches out and turns off the faucet, the sudden silence punctuated only by the sound of your shared breathing. He steps out of the shower first, taking a moment to grab a fluffy towel from the rack and wrapping it around his waist. Then, with a gentlemanly gesture he offers you his hand to help you step out onto the mat.

You accept his help with a grateful smile, your fingers curling around his as he assists you. He takes another towel and begins to gently dry your body, his movements tender and unhurried. The care he takes with you, the way he looks at you with a mixture of awe and desire, makes you feel cherished and beautiful.

Once you're both dry, you lead him back to your bedroom, the cool sheets a welcome relief against your warm skin. You crawl onto the bed, your body still humming with the aftereffects of your shared pleasure, and Joel follows suit, lying down beside you. For a moment, neither of you speaks. There's a sense of contentment that fills the room.

Joel reaches out and takes your hand in his, his thumb tracing lazy circles on your palm. "That was... something else, darlin'," he murmurs, his voice a low rumble that sends a pleasant shiver down your spine.

You turn to face him, your eyes locking onto his. "It was," you agree, a soft smile playing on your lips. "I'm glad you took a chance on me, cowboy."

He chuckles, the sound rich and warm. "I think it's safe to say that I'm the one who got lucky."

You giggle, the sound light and carefree. It feels good to let go of the tension, to bask in the afterglow without overthinking the situation.

As the morning wears on, you both dress, the reality of the day ahead slowly beginning to intrude on your private world. You know that eventually, you'll have to face your dad, to pretend that nothing has changed, but for now, you're content to linger in bed with Joel, the world outside temporarily forgotten.

When you finally emerge from your room, you find your dad in the kitchen, sipping on a cup of coffee and reading the newspaper. He looks up as you enter, a smile spreading across his face when he sees the two of you together.

"Well, good morning, sleepyheads," he greets. "I hope you two weren't up too late."

You feel a flush of heat creep into your cheeks, but you manage to keep your expression neutral. "Not too late, Dad," you reply, your voice steady.

Joel, for his part, seems completely at ease, his years of friendship with your dad serving him well in this moment. He claps your father on the back and grins. "You know how it is. Once you get to talking, the time just flies by."

Your dad nods, seemingly satisfied with the explanation. He stands up from the table and stretches, his joints popping in the quiet of the kitchen. "Well, I'm glad you two had a good time. How about some breakfast?

Throughout the meal, you're acutely aware of his presence, the knowledge of what lies beneath his clothes, the feel of his skin against yours, the taste of him on your lips. It's a heady secret, one that you carry with you as you navigate the normalcy of the morning.

Eventually, the meal comes to an end, and Joel stands up, wiping his mouth with a napkin. "I should probably be heading home," he says, his gaze meeting yours. "I've got a few things I need to take care of today."

Your dad nods, pushing back his chair and standing up as well. "I understand. Thanks for coming over. We'll have to do it again soon."

You walk Joel to the door, your heart pounding in your chest. This is the first time you've been alone all morning since the shower. He turns to face you, his hand reaching out to tuck a stray lock of hair behind your ear. "I had a great time, darlin'," he murmurs, his voice low and intimate. "Thank you for... well, for everything."

You smile up at him, your eyes shining with emotion. "I had a great time too, Joel. Take care, okay?"

He nods, his hand dropping back to his side. "You too, pretty girl."

With a final, lingering look, Joel turns and walks away, the sound of his footsteps echoing in the quiet of the morning. You close the door behind him and lean back against it, your mind racing with the events of the past 24 hours.

As you make your way back to the kitchen, your dad looks up from the dishes he's washing and gives you a smile. "He's a good man, that Joel," he says, his voice filled with a warmth and affection that only comes from years of friendship. "I'm glad you two get along so well."

You nod, a sense of peace settling over you. "Yeah, Dad. He’s really good.”

And as you help your dad finish the dishes, the memory of Joel's touch, the sound of his voice, the taste of his kiss, all of it lingers in the back of your mind, a sweet reminder you can only hope happens again and again. 

Special taglist for @milla-frenchy 😘

[bxnnywrites]

hiya!! im the anon that told you abt requests being closed, im glad i could help you out!!

i saw you headcanon danny as demiromantic and im very curious, what would it be like if danny had romantic feelings for a survivor reader? how would those feelings develop? i’m not demi myself so i’m rlly curious about the process of it!!

oh anon you have no idea how excited i am to answer this

*clears throat*

🫀 𝐃𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐲 𝐂𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐬 𝐅𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐒𝐮𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐯𝐨𝐫!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 🫀

TW :: Obsessive behavior, stalking, violence, general Danny Warnings

Authors Notes :: This uh...kinda turned into a ficlet. Oops!!! I've just thought of this scenario a LOT so I had a lot to say-

Anyways!! Hope you enjoy <3 (also this isn't proof read, we die like men)

It took a really long time for him to realize it, or maybe just for the emotions to develop. He wasn't sure.

You had appeared months ago, or whatever the equivalent was in the realms. Time wasn't exactly an easy concept to pin down here.

For a long time you were just another survivor, someone his knife sliced through with delicate ease. Someone to hunt and kill, that was his job, and entity if he didn't love every fucking second of it.

He liked to stalk his victims, both in and out of trials. Especially the new ones, he loved to see what made them tick. What really fucking scared them.

So he was keeping an eye on you, taking his usual notes, keeping an ear out for anything to use against you later.

But it started to develop into something a bit...more than that.

Suddenly he noticed his notes becoming less about what you feared and more about what you liked.

The way you smiled, how you laughed at Ash's jokes, the way you bit your knuckles when you were worried. The way your eyes lit up when seeing your friends and fuck he wanted to see your eyes light up for him like that.

He shook it off, had to shake it off. It got in the way of what he did. What even was this feeling?

Sure he had flings before he was taken, but he never really had feelings for them. It was part of the game, part of his job. Something to keep him low on the radar. That's all.

Was that what this was then? What it felt like to properly fall in love?

He hated it.

He hated every feeling, he hated the way your smile made his chest light up. He hated how distracted he was, so fucking distracted.

He hated you.

He couldn't stop thinking of you.

Quit laughing at Ash's stupid fucking jokes they aren't even that fucking funny.

More scribbling, more anger, why did you have to appear here? Was it some sort of taunt by the entity? Some kind of damn punishment? Fuck you and fuck whatever feelings you gave him.

For a long time it was like that, if you were in a trial with him you were the first hooked. You were too much of a distraction to his work.

And maybe he loved the feeling of holding you like this but fuck he wouldn't admit that.

------

Eventually you got fucking tired of it.

Every damn trial he would tunnel in on you and only you. Wouldn't focus on anyone else while you were around.

You realized quickly killers couldn't truly kill you. You felt it, every last agonizing slice into your flesh, every bruise, every broken bone, but you would just wake up at the fire at the end.

And you needed to figure out what the fuck his issue was.

Your fellow survivors tried very hard to convince you out of it, but they understood being pissed about it. So in the end, no one stopped you.

So there you were, in front of Autohaven Wreckers. A few survivors tipped you off that Ghostface liked to hang out around this area. Beats you as to why, the place stank of burning rubber and old oil. It made your stomach turn, but you entered nonetheless.

As you walked through the old junkyard, it dawned on you, you didn't really have a plan. You had done this mainly on a whim, annoyed at constantly being targeted and harassed by the white faced freak. Where were you even supposed to look? What if the Wraith saw you? This was fucking stup-

Before you could react a leather gloved hand covered your mouth, pulling you back as the cold steel of a sharp blade touched your throat.

"You scream and this is going into your fucking back, got it?" The voice was husky in your ear, unfamiliar. It made you realize you had never heard Ghostface speak before. So you nod, and he make an approving noise before releasing you. You run a hand over your throat where his knife had bit into it, leaving a light red line against it.

"So," He spoke again, letting you turn to him finally to confirm your suspicions. There he was, the Ghostface in the flesh, mask and all. "What do I owe the pleasure, Doll?"

"Well," You started, feeling your anger bubble up in you again. "For fucking starters, I have some damn questions for you, asshole."

Oh he loved when you spoke like that, some real final girl trope shit.

"Ooo, questions for the killer?" He cooed, leaning against a nearby car and watching you intently. "Brave of ya, Doll. I like it."

"Oh fucking can it, you damned halloween drop out!" You spat, and though you couldn't see it under his mask, your words had him grinning ear to ear. He loved when you were angry like this. "Why the fuck do you keep tunneling me, huh?! Every fucking trial we have you steamroll me and kill me as quick as possible. It's fucking bullshit, dude!"

He laughs a bit, removing his leather glove and using his knife to pick the dirt from under his nails.

"I dunno what you're talkin bout, babe." He says nonchalantly. "You're mad because what, I'm killing you during trials? Come on, that's my job-"

"Bullshit, this is more than that and you know it!" You seethe, god if you knew you wouldn't die you'd punch him. "What's your fucking damage? Hell, I've heard stories about other trials, you're even fucking friendly with some of the survivors sometimes! What the fuck did I ever do to you?!"

His eye twitches.

"Like I said, I'm just doing my fucking job. Now if you would just-"

"NO YOU AREN'T!" You shout at him and he's on you in an instant, hand over your mouth and you can see his eyes through his mask. A deep red brown and angry.

"Listen here you stupid bitch, one more outburst like that and I'm gutting you like a fucking fish, understand?" He snaps, his grip on your face almost bruising. Fear grips you again and you nod. He sighs, letting you go again with an unspoken warning that he would follow through if you got loud like that again.

"Look, it's fucking...it's complicated." He mumbled, looking almost shy as he played with one of the ghostly strips of fabric attached to his outfit. "You're just...you're a fucking distraction. Every trial I'm in with you it's hard to fucking focus, and I have a fucking job to do god damn it." He grumbles. You almost feel bad for him, almost.

"What, and that's my problem?" You snap in return.

"Yeah, it fucking is." He snaps in return, starting to pace back and forth. "I have work to do, people to kill, fear to harvest, the whole nine fucking yards. But you," He points, "You get in the fucking way, you make me lose track, you make me...you...fuck, you make me feel something, OK?"

You blink dumbly at him, finally speechless, and he continues.

"I get this stupid fucking feeling in my stomach and it makes me fucking twitchy. It makes my damn mind race and I can't tell if it's because I want to fucking dissect you or..." He trails off.

"...Or?" You question.

"I don't know!" He snaps, growling a bit as he continues pacing. "I haven't fucking felt like this before, I didn't think I fucking could. I just..." He takes a breath, looking back at you. "I need you to stop."

Your mouth hangs open, shocked by his...confession? If you could call it that.

"What?" You question again.

"Stop! Stop making me feel...whatever the fuck this is!" He snaps again, and even though you can't see his eyes anymore, you can feel the frustration wafting off him.

"How the fuck am I supposed to do that?!" You snap in return, annoyance rising in you as well. "It's not my fault you have a...a fucking crush on me or something!"

"Yes it is, it's absolutely your fault!" He throws his arms up, almost like an annoyed toddler. "It's your fault because you have this soft fucking face and this pretty laugh and that stupid fucking smile! You have these fucking eyes that light up whenever you get to talking about what you love, and fuck I just wish for once that was ME and-" He cuts himself off with a growl, kicking a nearby stack of tired and knocking them down. "It's bullshit, you're bullshit, it's all fucking bullshit!"

You're left speechless until he finally looks at you again.

"There, you happy? Now could you fucking make it stop?!" He breathes out, his eyes just barely visible through the black mesh of his mask.

"I...Well...fuck uh..." You mumble, shifting your weight from foot to foot. "I...don't think I can do that? I mean..."

"Fuck, yeah, course you can't." He grumbles, fidgeting with the fabric strips of his costume again. "I just...this is a stupid, distracting fucking feeling and I hate it."

"Well...I mean..." You take a breath, not really sure how to approach the situation. "Maybe we could like...I dunno...start over?"

He looks at you, and you swear he thinks you're insane.

"Start over?" He questions, "The fuck you mean start over?"

"Like, I dunno. Figure shit out from the beginning, like...get to know each other or something?" You say awkwardly, rubbing the back of your neck.

"...Are you fucking crazy?" He questions, and yeah, you expected that. "Like, hello, earth to Dollface, I've killed you dozens of times now. I have murdered your friends in front of you." He snaps his fingers, impressive considering he's still wearing his gloves. "Like sure, sounds nice and all, but how the fuck do you expect to just start over? Hi, what's up, the names Ghostface. Wanna get stabbed?"

"Don't be a fucking dickhead." You snap in response and huff, "Look, I don't know what you want me to do about...whatever this shit is," You motion to him vaguely. "Like I dunno dude, you need a good therapist or something?"

"Fuck you." He growls.

"Yeah, whatever." You breath out. "Look, I don't care what you do, but I'm sick of you pulling bullshit during trials because of...whatever your feelings are. So you either talk to me about it and we get it sorted, or I start making offerings to the entity to make your job even harder than I apparently already am." You cross your arms and look him up and down before sighing. "I'm heading back to camp, if you want to fucking talk-"

"Wait," He grabs your arm and you stop, looking back at him before he sighs. "OK maybe...maybe you're right. Maybe we can like, try that? I dunno."

You smile at him, sighing in relief.

"Good, I prefer that." You turn to him, extending a hand and telling him your name proper, even though he already knows it. "Nice to meet you, Ghostface."

He stares at your hand for a second, but slowly, he takes it.

"...Ghostface is fine for now." He mumbles, shaking it awkwardly. "So...uh...how do we do this?"

"Well...what kinds of movies did you like? Before you got taken."

His eyes light up, and suddenly he's on a kick. Rambling happily about his favorite horror movies while you listen.

Things get better after that.

Rather than being targeted, you're more often than not spared during trials.

Of course people get suspicious though, so you have to cut a small deal with him to either spare all of you during trials or kill everyone including you.

He's not personally a fan of the second option, so he ends up sparing your little party whenever you're involved.

You two get closer and you start to have your own feelings for him in return.

Eventually he tells you his real name. Danny, it rolls off your tongue nicely.

He's nervous at first, but eventually his smooth charm comes back and it's rare for him to not leave you flustered and blushing when you two talk.

When you finally get the courage to tell him your feelings, you swear he's on cloud nine. immediately talking about how happy he's going to make you and how he'll make sure no one in this fucking realm ever touches you.

You have to talk him down from that, knowing that your other survivors would hate you if you were the only exception during trials. And while he says "fuck em" you know you can't have him as your only friend in the realm, as much as part of him would love that.

But it's nice, he treats you like royalty. Like you're his entire world.

It might not be a real happy ending, but it's probably the closest you'll get in this hellhole.

And that's good enough for the both of you.

[avocado-writing]

Gale Anon returns to Say: Yes absolutely the Mummy fic. I''m requesting more good boy Gale if you happen to have more thoughts on it. Or maybe a dirty talk Gale? Follow your heart. Thanks again for ur time, ur writing, and ur filthy mind.

well this got a lot more kinky than I meant it to oop. Thank you to M for helping me flesh out the idea!

cw: kinda cnc?; mild bimboification; mild puppy play; consent checks; excessive use of the words “good boy”; sub!gale; dom!reader

rating: E minors dni

Poor Gale is having a hell of a time of it.

Between teaching his classes; all the admin that the college has him doing; and his wizarding duties outside of academia, he’s barely had a chance to rest. Every night he stumbles home exhausted, barely able to keep up conversation with you, let alone indulge in any more intimate activities. It makes you so sad to see. You thought that after the Absolute was dealt with he’d have more control over his life - but it seems like the exact opposite has happened.

It’s been ages since the two of you were able to indulge, since you’ve been able to lay him out on your bed and ride him into oblivion. Reduce him to a quivering mess who’s barely able to speak or think. It’s something both of you enjoy, you getting him to let go and be a good boy for you.

That’s the issue, really; he’s been using his brain too much. He needs a break. To let himself go lovely and empty-headed, sweet and pliable under you. Let you decide what he needs.

When the college breaks for its spring holiday, he comes home to you so desperate that you think he might cry. You’re sitting in your reading nook when he appears, collapses to his knees in front of you and l buries his face in your lap.

“Today,” he says, voice thick with exhaustion and emotion, “it needs to be today. Please.”

There’s only one thing he can be talking about.

Sometimes it takes a little while for him to empty his head. After all, if you’re as brilliant as Gale is, your mind is always thrumming with ideas and duties, a veritable beehive of thoughts. Usually you’re able to get him there using your myriad of tricks, but sometimes you’re worried it takes too long for him to fully enjoy the session.

So the two of you have been working on a spell.

It is, at its core, a rework to be a far less powerful scroll of Feeblemind. Designed to put its target into a sweet, thoughtless state for a handful of days, where all they can do is experience pleasure and praise. No room for thinking, just feeling. 

The two of you have been refining it for a while now, and though you’re certain it will work - and is able to be lifted with no adverse effects - you still chew your lip, nervous.

“Gale, love, are you sure? If I cast it, you know you’re probably not going to be able to tap out.”

Gale groans and nuzzles into your further, pressing his face into your leg for comfort.

“I’m aware of that, but gods I need it. I trust you entirely with it, with me. I want you to take complete control over me. I want you to take care of me until I’m too boneless to move. Please, my love. Please.”

When he asks like that, how can you say no?

That night, he sits on your bed in only his smallclothes, cock straining in excitement despite his tiredness. You give him a long, sweet kiss, before pulling away.

“Last chance, darling. Are you sure?”

“I’m sure,” he affirms, and you begin to cast the spell.

As you chant, you see Gale begin to go a little vacant. His body relaxes, all the tension immediately flooding out of it, the only thing remaining rigid being his cock. Soon there is only a sweet emptiness on your lover’s face, a dopey smile, eyes soft and aroused as he looks at you.

“Gale, are you with me?” 

He turns his head to the sound of your voice, managing an ‘mmm’ of affirmation but no words along with it. You reach out to cup his face and he immediately presses into you, mouth seeking out the warmth of your palm to kiss at it. You giggle.

“Gale!” you squeal, and he gives you another sincere, saccharine smile. Interesting…

“Aren’t you a good boy?” you hum, and his lips open just enough to let out a little moan. He twitches in his underwear. Despite his current state, he still responds to your praises, and you intend to use that to your advantage. 

“You’re so lovely, Gale. My handsome wizard. You’re so clever, but I love having you like this, just a silly boy who wants to behave for me. To be good for me. Don’t you want to be good for me, Gale?”

He nods, tears of desperation forming in his eyes. He scoots forward on the bed until his length is flush with your thigh and gently starts to rock his hips up into you, so needy for any kind of stimulation like this that he’d fuck your leg. 

“Awww, you want to get off, baby?”

Another moan of confirmation. You card your fingers through his hair and his eyes roll back in pleasure. You continue to pet him through your steady stream of praise. 

“Always so good for me, my good boy. Go on, honey, fuck yourself up against me. Let me just pull these down…”

You reach to his underwear and tug at the waistband, allowing his cock to spring upwards. He mewls at the cool bedroom air on his tip, already dribbling with precome, and begins to rut against you with more enthusiasm now that he has your consent. His face is buried into your stomach as his arms wrap around you to hold you close, his hips pressing against you in an erratic pace. When he comes for the first time it’s with a relieved little whine from the back of his throat. He coats your skin with his release, shiny and pearlescent; you feel him collapse into you. 

“Good boy. Good boy, Gale.”

He hums happily. You pet him some more.

“You know what good boys also do? They don’t leave a mess. Why don’t you clean me up, sweetheart? And use your tongue, hmm? Alright?”

Gale looks up into your eyes, soft and sweet and pliable, nodding enthusiastically at your suggestion. He’d do anything to get your pretty words anyway, but like this he is even more open to your kindness. He drops to his knees and begins to lick his spend from your thigh, lips trailing upwards from your knee where it has started to drip down. It is a powerfully erotic image to see him so thoroughly at your beck and call. Your leg is left damp when he is done but he licks his lips to show you that he’s finished and ready for more instructions. 

Oh, you are going to have a wonderful few days. 

In order to keep him near you, you decide to employ the use of a leash. The collar is snug but comfortable around his neck and he’s happy to go wherever you bring him. There’s no point in him wearing any clothes as the tower is always at an ambient temperature, so he spends his days nude by your side. Whenever he’s desperate for attention he searches out your warmth and buries his face into you, and you either run your fingers through his hair if he’s looking for sweetness or use your hand on him if he’s looking for stimulation. Either way he’s left a dizzy mess afterwards who you coddle and praise. 

He’s so relaxed, and it’s an utter pleasure to see. You sit on the sofa, propped up with plush pillows, while he reclines at your feet with his cheek resting on your leg. His proximity to you is a calming presence for him, and often he turns his head to press a kiss into your skin for no reason other than he wants to.

He loves you so completely. In return, your heart is entirely his. 

Occasionally he gets very needy and presses open your thighs, hitching up your robes and nuzzling into your sex.

“Gale, are you sure?” you ask, his glassy eyes shining with surety as he nods. He fucks you with his mouth as if it’s his gods-given duty, ekeing as many orgasms out of you as you’re able to give him. When he’s done and his face is shiny with your come, you see he’s spent on the floor; it is a simple order for him to clean up leaves him moaning in arousal. 

He is thoroughly taken care of. You’re never far from him to offer comfort, constantly checking in that he’s happy. He always nods his affirmation but lets you know if there’s anything the matter; hunger or exhaustion weighing on him. 

You feed him. You don’t need to, he’s capable of doing it himself, but he gets hard as he sits in your lap and you offer him bites of sandwich from your hand, face in a permanent grin of adoration. 

The last night you expect the spell to last is when you finally ride him. The two of you have had so many orgasms over the past few days you’re surprised that there’s anything left in the tank, but you still find it in yourself to fuck him into sweet oblivion. He’s able to clutch onto your hips and moan your name, pleasure his only feeling, your love the only thing he knows.

You fall asleep entwined in an embrace, gorgeous little words dripping from your lips until you drift off. 

The next morning you wake and the bed is empty, but you can smell bacon being fried in the kitchen. You groggily drag yourself along its scent until you find Gale standing at the stovetop, in his purple dressing gown and an apron, humming happily to himself. A couple of sleepy steps forward allow you to embrace him and tuck your face between his shoulderblades.

“The plan was to bring you breakfast in bed, but you seem to have thoroughly waylaid it,” he remarks. You can hear the smile in his voice. He’s verbal again - you’re glad he seems to be back to his usual self. 

“Mmm, I just wanted to see you. How are you, love? Are you alright? I tried to check in with you as much as I could…”

He turns to face you, and you’re immediately struck with how relaxed he looks. His eyes are soft, jaw loose, none of the tension he was carrying apparent any more. 

“My heart, I’m more than alright. I’ve never been so thoroughly taken care of. I’m so glad - blessed, really - to have you to look after me. I love you.”

He kisses you, and it’s long and delicious. 

“So, successful experiment, Professor Dekarios?” you ask, a cheeky grin on your face. He groans at that title, and you feel his cock throb. 

“I think you might have drained me dry over these past days, but I’m more than willing to see if I have one more in me…” he mutters, stepping forward to trap you between his body and the table. 

“It’s for research, after all.”

taglist: @ghosti02art @sadandanxiouswtf @yeethaw13@trappedinlimbo15@infinitely-kate@dhampling@wereallbrokenangels@tilldeathdonugget@useless-contributions@beardedladyquee

[ilwonuu]

hello!!!

it’s ur 🍒 anon and i would like to request a hao brothers best friend trope type fic?? tysm!!

my lovey 🍒 anon<3 HIII i would love to!!! thank u for requesting babes,,,i hope you enjoy ml💖💖

moonlight

: ̗̀➛ xu minghao

ᯤ paring- jun is readers brother, brothers best friend, friends to lovers<3 softdom!minghao x sub!reader

ᯤ warnings- smut with plot, they make out in a car, dry humping?? (just a lil), lots and lots of kissing, praise kinda??, unprotected sex(he pulls out tho💪), fingering (f receiving), dirty talk, after care, they’re very in love (yuck!!!), jun catches them cuddling (he lowkey loves them ok), affection, fluff, they stargaze together<3 MDNI

ᯤ a/n- not proofread OOPS PLS I WILL,,,,I MADE RHIS TOO LOMGSHAGSGS,,, im not regretting it tho because i LOVE it. minghao is rotting my brain anon thank u for sharing ur idea💖💖

he is going to be the death of you. “he” being xu minghao of course. the most gorgeous man you set eyes on. he’s also jun’s best friend, your brother. isn’t that just great for you? you’re around him constantly, he’s kind, caring, and very hot. why wouldn’t you have the biggest crush on him? he’s also coming over right now. you, him, and jun planned a hangout. you loved hanging out with them,,,especially minghao.

you guys had planned a game night with every board game imaginable. you three in you & juns living room. you were obviously winning in every game. but that was quickly cut short when a call interrupted your round of uno. jun looks around for his phone quickly. he grabs it,, answering his phone.

“hey! yea im free- okay cool i’ll leave soon!” he replies to the other person on the line. “i got myself a date!” he says after hanging up the phone. “they want to hangout! i’m so excited- surely you guys would be fine here by yourself.” he smiles at you two. “well of course we will. right y/n? go get that date.” he looks at you with a soft smile. you nod looking back at your brother. he is gone in an instant to go to his room.

“do you want to keep playing?” minghao breaks the small silence. you shrug a little shaking your head. “not really- i’m tired now.” you laugh at yourself feeling defeated. he nods his head agreeing with you. “i’m gonna lay down for a little bit. if that’s okay? i promise i won’t let you be alone for the night!” he nods and lays back against the couch.

“lay down all you need. im gonna do the same!” he smiles at you as you make your way to your bedroom. you smothered your self in your covers as soon as you get onto your bed. you try to find something to watch but there’s simply nothing good. so you think why not do something you literally always do. stargazing!!! maybe you can invite minghao? if he would even want to come- your brain can’t help but to bring him into everything.

you make your way down to the living room to see minghao laying on the couch scrolling on his phone. you have your keys in hand as you grab you fill up your water bottle. “where are you going?” minghao turns to look at you.

“oh- i’m gonna go stargazing. you can come if you want.” you say looking at him with a soft smile. he jumps off the couch with a nod. “can i? that’s like my favorite thing ever.” he makes his way over to you leaving you awfully close. you blush at the closeness and look away from him. “okay let’s go.”

the stars and minghao had easily become one of your favorite things. you two are laying on a blanket at your favorite look out spot. the temperature is perfect and so is minghao. you try to focus on the stars you really do but you just keep getting distracted. “what are you thinking about in that pretty head?” his words catch you completely off guard. you try not to show how flustered he makes you as you reply.

“nothing- just staring into space.” you smile as you turn to him. you regret that very quickly. he’s just so pretty. “you think jun is having a good time on his date?” he asks looking at you softly. you nod. “i’m sure of it! juns really great. and he really likes them. he’s always telling me.” you laugh as you think of the memories of your brother.

“yea me too. they seem great for him.” he nods at your words turning back to look at the stars,, you doing the same. “you want to go on a date with someone? you got a crush?” he blurts out as he smiles at the stars. “oh- well not really. i don’t know i guess?” he turns to look at you. “that was an unsure answer.” he giggles a little and you blush at that. the sound of his laugh filling your ears is something you could listen to forever.

“well i do like someone but they don’t like me back so it’s stupid.” he shakes his head. “not stupid at all. i-well i’m kinda in the same situation. i get you.” he smiles at you. “what do you think i should do?” you say looking away from him. “i don’t know- i would say go for it. you never know what will happen.” his words are comforting but you obviously don’t think you’ll be able to go through with his advice. you’re very afraid of rejection and making it weird for jun. you never want to put him in that situation.

“why haven’t you taken your own advice? i know it’s easier said than done.” he sighs a little at your words. “the girl i like is kinda off limits. well i don’t if i would say off limits but it’s just complicated.” you nod at him. “y/n- i don’t know if i should say this. but the girl is you- it’s fine if you don’t feel the same i understand. i just can’t lie to you.” he says looking at you waiting for you to say something. you are beyond shocked by his confession. you never thought that he would feel the same.

“look i’m sorry if that made you uncomfortable. that’s the last thing i wanted to do.” his expression softens as he sits up. “no minghao! i’m not uncomfortable i swear. i just am shocked because i feel the same.” you sitting up as well to look at him fully. “really? are you messing with me?” he laughs nervously.

“no no- i would never do that. minghao i like you too. i have for awhile i just could never tell you. i was too scared and i know it’s stupid because you’re jun’s best friend and i know how easy you are to talk to- i’m just rambling now i’m sorry im nervous!” you laugh looking away from him. “don’t be sorry. i’m nervous too. you make me very nervous,,in the best way!” he says not taking his eyes off you.

“can i kiss you?” he asks grabbing your hand. “yes-“ his lips are quick to meet yours. the kiss is sweet and filled with love. you let a moan slip as he deepens the kiss. his hand cups your face as slowly melt more into the kiss.

you’re the first to pull away with a light pant. “i wanted to do that for a really long time.” you say with a smile. he nods his head pulling you into a hug. “me too- also you look really pretty tonight,,you always do.” his words always make you blush but him calling you pretty has you bright red. you laugh looking away from him.

“no- i meant it you look beautiful.” you smile as he rubs your cheek a little having you look at him. “thank you minghao. you’re sweet.” he smiles before looking around. “it’s getting pretty late do you think we should go back?” you nod getting up from your spot grabbing your blanket heading back to the car. “do you want to drive?” you ask waving the keys at him. “sure.” he smiles as you throw the keys to him. you both getting into the warmth of the car.

“minghao- can i kiss you again?” you turn touching his arm gently. “of course sweetheart. come here.” you literally think you might die right then and there. sweetheart????? you could die happy now of course. he leans in to kiss you, his hand coming up to grab your face again. this kiss is more desperate on his end and you love it. it’s hungry but he’s still being gentle.

“you’re so fucking pretty.” he says in between kisses. you have butterflies in your stomach. you are dying in front of him and you don’t even care. you moan quietly as you slowly climb over his lap. he helps you onto his lap as you get comfortable. you grind down mindlessly against him causing him to pull away from the kiss.

“shit- are you- do you want to do this?” you nod pecking his lips. “maybe a little here and more at home? if you want to- hao i really want you.” he laughs in disbelief. “you’re gonna kill me. i want you more than anything pretty.” he pulls you into another kiss as you start to grind down onto him again. he groans into the kiss moving his hands to your hips helping you move against him.

“fuck- let’s go now.” you pull away from the kiss and climb off of him. he laughs straightening out himself as he starts the car. “wait- what if jun is there?” you look at him as he starts to drive to your house. “i don’t think he’s back yet. i think he would’ve texted or something.” he smiles at you quickly looking back at the road.

as soon as you guys make sure no one is home. you are quick to run to your bedroom. you guys are stripping each other like its a race. he is on top of you kissing your neck slowly. “can i touch you?” he asks as he kisses against your chest and down your stomach. “please hao-“ he kisses against your thighs. he comes back up to face you to kiss your lips. you feel his fingers rub against your thighs. he plants soft whispers and praises into your neck as feel his fingers rubbing against your slit.

“hao-“ he shuts you up by kissing you as you feel one of his fingers enter you. he’s kissing you sloppily as he works his finger slowly. he pulls away to look at you fully spread for him. “look at you. so so pretty i can’t-“ he kissing against your skin gently as he cups one of your breasts rubbing it gently. you moan out quickly putting your hand over your mouth.

“don’t hide yourself. you sound so pretty.” his finger curls inside you as he rubs your clit with his thumb. “b-but what if jun comes h-home.” you throw your head back at the pleasure quickly forgetting about your words. your moan is loud as minghao licks a small stripe against your neck, kissing it very carefully.

“h-hao? can you fuck me? please i n-need you.” you pull his face closer to you by his chain, careful not to break it. “shit- are you sure?” he asks as he kisses your cheek. “yes! i’m- so sure please-“ he nods quickly moving to spread your legs for him. he gives his dick a couple strokes as he lines up with you. you watch him with intense eyes as you feel yourself get wetter. his brown hair messy and the dark light is making you lose your mind. how could someone be so perfect? he wants you? you are beyond lucky.

“you are completely sure?” he looks up at you. you nod pulling him down to peck his lips. “i need you- please hao.” you sigh as you feel him rub his tip against your clit. “why are you teasing?” you pout at him as he chuckles at you a little. “okay- i won’t tease you anymore.” you feel him push into you gently as he leaves kisses against your neck and shoulders.

“oh- oh my gosh hao-“ you wince at the pain but it was quickly replaced with pleasure. he slowly bottoms out watching your face. “are you okay?” you rubs your side lovingly as he watches your expression. “yes- keep going. you can move-“ he cuts you off as he starts to move his hips shallowly.

“shit- i didn’t ask about protection-“ he looks around as he draws his hips from you. “no- you can just pull out! if you’re okay with that?” you grab his arm gently. he looks at you with a half smirk. “yea- fuck okay.” he is quick to return to movements. you cry out loudly, moaning his name.

he groans when he hears his name leave your lips. “fuck- keep moaning my name sweetheart.” okay did you just come? well no but you could’ve from how sexy he sounded. you throw your head back as his hips speed against you. his hands are gripping your hips helping you move with his thrusts. “this okay?” you nod moaning out.

“so g-good.” you are almost to tears he’s moving at the perfect pace and being so gentle. he leaves soft kisses against your body. the praises sending you into heaven. “you’re so pretty- fuck aren’t you?” “you look so perfect for me, all for me.” you blushing at each of his statements as your cunt agrees with the loving praises he’s giving you. “shit- i might come.” he looks at you before groaning as his hips start to slow just slightly.

“me- too. don’t s-stop.” you grip his shoulder as you moan his name loudly. his hips start to move at the perfect angle causing both of you to cry out for each other. “i’m coming-“ he kisses your neck as his hips stuttering. you clench around him as you to warn him, coming undone. he groans as he pulls out of you. his warm seed painting your stomach. you both moan out as he throws his head back.

“you were so perfect. took it so well for me.” he kisses your head. “look at you gorgeous as ever sweetheart.” he rubs your cheek as he grabs a rag to clean you up. he’s very gentle as he cleans you up. he’s looking at you giving you cute smiles as you feel some spots tickle. he gives your face soft kisses as he finishes cleaning you off.

“all clean now- well kinda.” he smiles pulling your fave in to kiss you as he crawls into the bed with you. just a few hours ago you were thinking of the boy in that same bed. you look over as him as you hand him his shorts and grab your discarded clothes both of you getting dressed. minghao staying shirtless with just his shorts. you guys crawl back into bed together. he pulls you close to him almost instantly. “i think i’m in love with you.” he says as he looks at you. your smile quickly turns into an even bigger one.

“hao i think i am too.” you kisses his lips snuggling back into him. “you’re so beautiful. how am i so lucky?” he kisses your cheek. “will you be my girlfriend?” he asks you as he lays his head against yours. “of course i will hao.” you smile kissing his head. you two stay cuddled up for another hour as you hear the front door open. jun came in to no one in the living room, which he thought was weird. maybe minghao is in his room and you are in yours? of course he’s gonna check on you first. he opens your door without knocking giving you and minghao to separate from each others arms.

“i’m home. how was ur nig-“ he looks at you guys blankly for a second almost speechless. “did you guys- have sex?” he looks at minghao’s boxers and shirt with your bra against the floor. “uh-“ he shakes his head. “fucking finally. well first of all gross. but finally you guys can stop annoying me with the awkward flirting!” he laughs quietly.

“glad your night was eventful.” you hide your face in embarrassment. “okay enough about that! how was your date jun?” you ask him, you smile as minghao nods along with your words. “it was great! we’re going to breakfast so on that note i’m going to bed. i also need to wash this image out of my mind.” he turns away from your door closing. “we weren’t even doing anything!” you shout through the door. he ignores you but you quickly get a text.

jun😾- goodnight love u guys 🤮

[judasgot-it]

MAY I PLEASE REQUEST KALDO X READER PLEASE? I DON'T SEE THIS MAN OFTEN. At first, the reader wasn't exactly interested in Kaldo's combination food taste, it tasted okay for her. Until she's pregnant? She starts having 'weird cravings' that's when she finds out how good the taste of honey or syrup with the other food combinations are

Omggg I love Kaldo sm, need to write for him tbh cause even if he's a side character, I love him...(I have a type it's so painfully obvious)

Headcanons: Enjoying Kaldo's honey sashimi...(also tw for pregnancy ig)

Headcanons:

Usually, when Kaldo offered his food, you would try it and say it's 'ok'

It wasn't a relationship ender - he was happy he found someone who at least tolerated his addiction

You mostly worried about him developing cavities, tbh

But recently, you found yourself salivating over whatever he ate - some of it was so bizarre, that you were starting to wonder if you had gotten hit on the head too hard.

For Kaldo? It was a goddamn miracle at first

Anything for you. He became a five-star chef in your eyes, and it made him so happy he felt like he was walking on air

You didn't even need to lift a finger. This man was spoiling you, really

For a while.

You had started to throw up in the mornings, which was a little more than concerning

The two of you were smart and figured it was the new diet. Kaldo was a little disappointed, but he could live

But you didn't stop. and despite eating healthier after that, you had started to gain weight for some reason

yeah. oh. oops.

Kaldo was pretty excited to be a dad. He was a calm, level-headed guy - but his thoughts were getting ahead of him

like damn...he was going to be a dad. maybe he was starting to understand Ryoh a little; because the idea of shoving a picture of you with a little kid that he made was starting to sound appealing

He had a lot of people he wanted to call and brag about being a dad too. half of them wouldn't care, but he needed to tell someone

but he tried to be cool about it

you were a little mad at him at first when you first realized.

Kaldo was making it up to you, but yeah, your vacation plans were put on hold for a long time.

Also adding a short drabble cuz there's nothing for him:

"Let me try that."

You reached over, trying to grab a taste of his honey-soaked udon. It had more honey than broth, and it moved in a slow way as he brought his chopsticks through the bowl.

"Seriously?"

Nodding, you tried to pick at it, but your annoying husband only swatted you away. He gave you an incredulous look, trying to see if he actually believed that you would even want any of his food.

You stared back, waiting. The man was too protective over his bowl, knowing that there now was someone willing to steal from him.

"Open your mouth."

Obliging to his orders, he held your chin gently against his hand, stuffing your open mouth full of honey and salty udon noodles. Instead of the expected disgust, you found yourself smiling at the burst of flavor.

"You...you like it?"

Kaldo didn't really know what to expect. You never really had liked his food this much before. At best, he got 'it's edible' from you.

Nodding, you opened your mouth for more, like some sort of shark. He huffed, indulging you.

"Shouldn't you eat your own food?"

"Yeah, but yours is good. The honey adds to it."

He smirked.

"Really now?"

You weren't ever going to live saying that down.

This is kinda short but I love Kaldo sm. what a little freak

[midnight1nk]

So, WOTFI 2024...

[Spoilers below cut]

I'm so excited! Got my bingo card ready and my popcorn, we gotta manifest good things here.

(the following is my live reaction:)

3... 2... 1... HAPPY NEW YEAR Oh wait, wrong thing oops

happy to be here, Leggy (WE'LL SAVE YOU GUYS DON'T WORRY)

TENDER TUNNEL?! ...oh nevermind then. it's so over guys

OH Four, Mario!

this would've been such a Mar4 moment if it was still the Tender Tunnel cuz this reminds me a lot of the SMG34 tiktok kiss challenge

...wait is that... OMG IT'S TV TIME ARRANGEMENT OMG LET'S GOOOOOOOO marking this on the bingo card

the FNAF models....

"...a portrayal of my life." YES PLEASE give us more

the fact that Puzzles made a puppet of his child self just for this reenactment (i don't think he's ok guys)

oop, Leggy don't drop the child!

"Papa" gives so many flashbacks to other characters who call their abusive father "papa" (me, an Ace Attorney fan)

hold up, I need to talk about this for a bit. I know it may seem like random graffiti, but because it has gears and such, his future might've been set in stone. To become TV.

"I locked myself in my room and watched TV all day!" and no one checked up on him? Did he stay in that room all the way to adulthood?! Okay, the SMG4 universe has a different way of how time and body necessities work. But hunger and time are still things. The implications are kinda of messed up if you think about it: Mr Puzzles stayed in his room for YEARS without food or even sleep, watching everything on TV. He would've been a CORPSE by adulthood. No wonder Mr Puzzles has a thin waist.

"And the rest is history." No, Puzzles, you can leave us like this! I need more! What happened after he cut off his head, did he replace every limb of himself? What happened to his dad?

Well, we got more of his backstory ig, marking that for the bingo card

WOAH I knew Mr Puzzles swore before but DAMN

I might have to mark "Grudge against Four" box but we'll see

NEW OUTFITS OMG THAT GETS A MARKER

"We'll just have to go along with his twisted games for now." Hell yeah, you gotta be part of WOTFI, boys :)

AY SPECTACULAR TITLE CARD, LOVE THE ART

Blast-off Fire

this reminds me of Toy Story for some reason

C'mon guys, you can do it!

What's your idea, Mario? NO FOUR let him talk

WOW I LOVE [*ragdolls*]

OH IT WORKED

Insult-2-Dunk

OH the frame of what the challenge says has the 5 stars, I'm going to mark that

This is giving the hallway scene in IGBP, where Four has his thoughts on display

Yeah I'm going to count that as an IGBP reference

they really are boyfriends 💙💜 gay people do be sitting

really tempted to mark the "You Saved Me" box but I'll wait

That's... actually sad if all the negative thoughts SMG4 had in IGBP came from the YT comments. Not surprising but it makes sense why he would try to keep everyone happy.

"This is nothing." OH THAT'S EVEN WORSE SOMEHOW, SMG4. THE AUDIENCE IS ONE THING BUT KAREN, A CLOSE FRIEND, TOLD YOU TO KYS

idk I could just imagine Four saying a lot of horrible things to himself

DAMN MARIO

but also Four's been flirting with Three, you already know that Mario /hj

Slap Box

TARI WE'RE SORRY BUT WE HAVE TO SAVE YOU GUYS

well you did get a bit of karma for what you said earlier to Four, sorry Mario

HOLY SHIT YOU KILLED HER DUDE oop Four said it for me nvm

Ferris Wheel Frenzy

I got jump scared and thought it was my minigame lmao

"Survive"? OH, are they going to get stuck on the Wheel ride?

please 34 please 34 nooooooooooo fuck

Missed opportunity man, still pretty funny

Fire Bonanza

Wow, Bob, that trick was pretty good ngl

Did somebody say arson? :)

even I'm clapping!

Marware shippers, how are y'all feeling?

Tightrope Terror

OH just like in the trailer, right?

OOH THREE VS FOUR

...yeah, Three would win, I'm not even surprised

That's so sweet, like actually

This feels familiar... oh that's right

:)

Hey, I did say "love wins, love always wins"

And that didn't work for Leggy... but it worked on Four back then so that's nice :)

Sword Showdown

poster reference!

Can Mario even defeat Bob? and also, reference to the poster?

Oh shit Mario did the Sephiroth shot from the Smash announcement

Knife Throw

boyfriends throwing knives :)

also poster reference

"...avoid hitting our volunteers" IS IT THREE?! oh no it's just Boopkins and Tari

I WANTED A "YOU SAVED ME" MOMENT NOOOO

....blindfolded?!

FOUR DOESN'T WANT TO HURT HIS FRIENDS

So uh yeah definitely a grudge

Four, that's Gmod. THIS IS NOT THE SAME

Three's the one throwing the knives at Tari right? ...yep *sigh /aff*

Balloon Blast

*looks at Luigi's creations* ....say what now?

"Supper Mario Balloon" I... shouldn't be surprised

He kinda looks like Pedro ngl

Pie-a-Ton

HI KAREN

NOOOO MARIO'S FIRST LOVE *prowler music*

...wait, "Mario Die"? OH well, the universe is doomed lol

Touch Grass

alright then *goes outside and touches grass* we did guys!

Clowns Clowns Everywhere

Puzzles, Four has boots on and Bob has no shoes at all. Does it look like we have time to put running shoes on?

ACE ATTORNEY? IN MY SMG4 WOTFI? :D

"King of Clowns" PFFT That never gets old

What did you expect Four? You make memes for a living, become the clown

Bomb Ski Ball

What type of SAW trap is this?

OH RIGHT Karen is still a cat

Yeah Mario, you celebrated too early

Ducky Mania

poster reference(???)

Well, thanks Luigi, we're dead

BELLS (ok, it might not count cuz they used this before)

YAY FOUR GOT ONE

Free-Fall Frenzy

And of course, Three and Karen and Saiko are all using the things they are skilled at

OH SHOOT MELONY'S SWORD

GO ON MARIO DO YOUR THING! MEGGY'S BACK!! IT WORKED

NO PUZZLES WHYYYYY

Whack a Leggy

Oh I love that Mario screen reference

SWORD FIGHT SWORD FIGHT SWORD FIGHT

...goop!4..?

oh nvm, cameras. that should've been obvious *slaps face*

SMART THINKING FOUR

OH hi Puzzles

LET'S GOOOOOOOOO

DUDE I'M GONNA CRY STOPP THIS IS SO SWEET OMG

"YOU'RE RUINING EVERYTHING", welp Mario Ruins the Show confirmed, checking that off

I just love how this scene was animated (edit: it turns out that this is a scene Anaidon animated, no wonder this was so good!)

THE KEYBOARD MONSTER FROM IGBP!!! IT'S BACKKKKK

AND EYES IN GENERAL

Marker for the bingo :)

AND PARK (kinda) DESTROYED, another mark (yes it counts)

Superhero landing!

Wait... what is it, Four?

...oh I hate this *IGBP flashbacks*

AND PEACH nooooooooo

I get that it's supposed to be Didney stuff but like that's past trauma right there for Four , seeing the castle and Peach costume again *checks off the bingo*

and we're seeing it through Four's right eye *head in hands* eye of horus

It's Rap Time? IT'S RAP TIME

Carnival-themed too! Another one for bingo

"Pay for what you've done" KARMA "We'll make him pay" KARMA

(edit: it turns out Shadow animated this scene, it looks great dude great job :D)

[*points at background at 22:31*] BELL THERE IT FUCKIN IS

MORE BELLS AT 22:55

and also I realized that there was a lot of "death", huh

Doomed Yaoi(TM)

Yeah, we can count this as the Freak Show

"Puzzlevision+" ...puzzlevision 2...?

hold up, what the hell is that? NO NO WE CAN'T JUST PASS BY THAT

Huh, how interesting is that Mr Puzzles, being controlled by wires, looks like a puppet when he's the only usually puppeteering hmmm

MEGGY CONFRONTS also she tried to give Puzzles a chance when she couldn't do it for Wren

"That child is gone... Six feet under right where you and your stupid friends belong." Oh, shit. That got me somehow.

There is something in philosophy called "Ship of Theseus" that basically is: what if, gradually over time, we replace every part of a person and the question would be, are they the same person anymore. It could apply to Mr Puzzles here. Bring back to my corpse question, his child self and his current self are not the same. Not anymore. Metaphorically and perhaps literally, the real man before Mr Puzzles came to be is already dead.

Some people do say that they can be "reborn" so.... *shrugs*

SACRIFICE! No one dies but they're risking their lives here!

Meggy going into Puzzles' mind reminds me a lot of Melony getting into Zero's, except for the meeting younger self stuff

Interesting, why did Little Puzzles cower from the woman shadow figure? They could've just put Meggy there but they didn't until a few seconds later... hmmm......

Well Meggy confronts Little Puzzles but it's more like her demanding him to set her friends free, which is understandable

THE CLUB PENGUIN DANCE IS BACK!! :D

ONCE AGAIN Little Puzzles gets scared of someone coming towards him. jesus what happened for you to react like that, dude?

THIS IS ACTUALLY MAKING ME FEEL THINGS DUDE. IF MR PUZZLES DIES AND THIS IS THE LAST THING HE THINKS ABOUT.... *head in hands* THIS IS SO SAD

And more of the Engine Room gets broken down

silly little goobers :)

MR PUZZLES LIVES

and I oop [Mr Puzzles will remember that.]

....oh, this might be a fate worse than death. I don't blame the Crew for not trusting him and after what he did to Meggy but damn I don't think this is the right choice, gang

But it is probably the best ending the Team could've given him.

Yes, painting is nice. Oh, a puppy too!

"...OR we could assassinate our enemies and anyone who's ever double-crossed us!" OH NO IT'S MAKING HIM WORSE

To destroy Four and the others, yeah that makes sense. But he must've taken Meggy's confrontation as a double-cross. He's going for everyone!

Dynamic Change, everyone!

but also.... puzzlevision 2 maybe....

OH HEY CHRIS AND SWAG HI

well, the park isn't completely destroyed but some of it did so....

"Hopefully Mr Puzzles will change for the better." HMMMM I don't think so, Meggy. Actually, are they aware of where he is now?

Aw, Mario checking up on Meggy is very sweet, the M&M siblings

YOU ALL NEED THERAPY

"Turning into Leggy was really taxing on my body but...I think that version of me has escaped off to a better place." Meggy, you must've inherited Phoenix Wright's invincibility when you were a lawyer because you were literally SCREAMING IN PAIN when you were forced back into Leggy, and all you get is just a bit of a sore back?! Girl, you must've broken something. I do hope they bring this back so that she can't do sudden maneuvers or fancy tricks due to what happened to her. There has to be some consequences here.

And now, Leggy's not coming back (I'm sure that's great news for the people who find her annoying, not me tho)

and I oop 2: electric bagaloo

MORE RIDES FOR THE SHOWGROUNDS HELL YEAH

Happy ending and all but hold up... Why is this the last shot of WOTFI? They could've had the Ferris Wheel, the entrance, or any of the other rides. WHY?! *shakes the crew* ANSWER MEEEEE

Well we didn't get a challenge relating to Tender Tunnel but since it appeared in the final shot, I'll count it just for appearing (and also because it might be important later but we don't talk about that now)

Of course, MERCH

"And, who knows? Next year, there might be even more things to come..." WHEN I GET YOU

Hoodie, poster, keychain I CALLED IT

baby leggy :3

"You'll just have to wait and see." Oh I'll be waiting *wiggles fingers together like a cartoon villain*

the great milk heist of 1899 :)

.・-: ✧ :--: ✧ :-・.

Here's my bingo card:

I think it's all of it, let me know if I miss or need to change anything. Can we count all the Four & Three soulmate parallels to the "You Save Me" box? Please? *sneaks a marker on there* To those who participated, I hope you guys had fun with my bingo card!

I'm still going to cherish that Ferris Wheel chase scene from the "Welcome to Puzzle Park" episode

Well, Ben, Shadow, you got anything to say?

Ben: Well that was fun We should really do this again sometime…

GOD DAMMIT BEN NOT AGAIN/affectionate

Shadow, in voice clip: "Hello once more, Twitter and SMG4 community! As always, I'm The Inverted Shadow and yeah, War of the Fat Italians 2024 has come and gone... and uh, as it is customary with a lot of these big events with SMG4, I have things to say but this time, I'm actually not going to make a big show out of it this time like what I did for Puzzlevision and..." *clear throat* "The things that came before because I'm going to be completely honest, guys, I was really fucking nervous for this one because, um, to be completely honest, this rap battle for this WOTFI is, I can safely say, one of the hardest things I had to do when animating for SMG4 thus far. And I was really really scared and nervous about (one) if it would actually come out good and (two) if people would actually like it. But just based on the reactions from the watch party with the SMG4 team and also just seeing everybody's reactions to WOTFI this year, um.... Yeah, you guys surely showed me I still must be doing something right." *laugh* "But, no no no. In all honesty, once more, thank you all genuinely. Genuinely, thank you all once again to the SMG4 community, to Luke, to Kevin, the SMG4 team. Everybody. Thank you all so much for showing me that I apparently still got it and I can still do the thing as it were." *chuckle* "Um, I do really hope you all enjoyed WOTFI this year. For now, I need to go get me that new Mr Puzzles plushie 'cause I need it. So, genuinely thank you all again and uh, peace!

Oh, we enjoyed this year's WOTFI, SMG4 Team! As Mario would say, that was-a loads of fun! The animation, the art, the music, everything was really really good. There are a few plot tweaks here and there that need a bit of work, but otherwise, it was great! Props to everyone on the Team! I can't wait to see what you guys do next.

"Silly little meme show" Right, and it's the same people who gave us horror, I'm on to you guys. please puzzlevision 2 please goop!4

Make sure you all support them bc they deserve it :) As for what will happen to the SMG4 crew, Mr Puzzles, and the Showgrounds, we will just have to wait and see.

;)

ink, it's not even a theory what are you talking about?

[roses-r-rosie3]

Put It Straight Part 2

Miguel O'hara x M!Reader

[Part 1]

Warnings: Mostly fluff, with a hint of angst

Summary: The reader gets invited to a hide-out by Gwen, and is starting to feel better, But Miguel on the other hand is losing his shit, and starts to cuss out/intimidate anyone that comes near him

Quote: “This is actually my third or second time, Miguel doesn’t really let me travel the multiverse a lot”

✁ - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

You had absolutely no idea where to go. This was your 3rd or 2nd time traveling the multiverse, mainly because Miguel wouldn’t allow you to travel too much in fear of you getting hurt. You were walking through a random version of New York from god knows which universe. But all of a sudden a portal opened in front of you, and Gwen came out of it.

“Hey y/n, I heard you weren’t on Miguel’s side anymore, so you wanna join us?” She said.

“Oh- uh- sure” you Said.

When you walked into the portal you were transported to a secret hideout of sorts with hundreds of other spider people. When you were walking around he bumped into Peter B Parker and Mayday.

“Oh hey y/n!” He said cheerfully.

“Hi Peter” you smiled.

“So, I heard that you and Miguel broke up, are you okay?” Peter asked.

You never really thought about it, you didn’t really know if you would consider it a break-up, more like a fight, but all of your fights with Miguel were never this serious.

“It’s kinda complicated” you said awkwardly.

“That’s good! So are you guys taking a break or-”

Peter was interrupted as Gwen elbowed him, and gave him the ‘Stop talking about it’ look.

“So y/n, first time traveling the multiverse?” Gwen said.

“This is actually my third or second time, Miguel doesn’t really let me travel the multiverse a lot” you responded.

“Enough about Miguel y/n! Try to lighten up a little! Oh and by the way, we got you little suit that has spider powers! You can be one of us now!” Peter smiled.

“Peter! It was supposed to be a surprise!” Gwen scolded.

“You guys did?!” You shouted in excitement.

Gwen and Peter both noticed how your face lit up in excitement every time a spider person would swing by you. For some reason, it never got old to you, it was just cool seeing people swing by. So they thought that they could make you your own spider suit.

“Hehe oops.. sorry” Peter laughed nervously.

“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you guys so much!” You smiled.

While you were having what you would describe as the best time of your life, Miguel was losing his shit. Cussing out anyone who dared even come near him, throwing stuff around, yelling, shouting, and punching the wall until it had a noticeable dent in it. Needless to say Miguel was NOT having fun.

Miguel ordered Lyla to try and track down where the watch you stole from him. Miguel was a reckless mess.

“Hey Miguel” Miguel turned around in anger to see who dared try and come near him, but he saw no one.

“Did you forget I was here too?” Lyla said.

“Did you find where y/n is?!” Miguel exclaimed.

“Yeah.. but after your little tantrum I don’t think I should give it to you” Lyla said teasingly.

“Lyla not now! I need to find y/n!” He yelled.

“Come on, you know the special word” Lyla smirked.

“Lyla this is serious!” Miguel shouted.

“Come onnnn, it’s just one simple little word” Lyla smirked.

Miguel sighed in defeat.

“Could you please give me the location of where y/n is?” Miguel grumbled.

“Sorry I didn’t hear that” Lyla smiled.

“Could you please give me the location of where y/n is?” Miguel said a bit louder.

“Come on you can speak waaaaaay louder than that” Lyla said.

“COULD YOU PLEASE GIVE ME THE LOCATION OF WHERE Y/N IS?” Miguel yelled.

“Yeah I don’t have it but thanks for the picture” Lyla laughed as she showed Miguel a picture of him with a bunny filter.

“LYLA!” Miguel shouted.

“Kidding!” Lyla said before sending Miguel the location.

[lunatic-pudge]

Postal Dad Headcanons

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Requested by Gojifan1962)

HAPPY POSTAL 2 DAY!!!!! Can't believe Dude is finally old enough to drink. Homie is going places and I'm proud of him!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

-Aight, so I'm turning this request to a pregnancy/dad headcanons cause why not. Kill two birds with one stone and might as well start from the beginning, breaking the news that you're pregnant

-Now, Dude doesn't seem one to want kids. But since these are my headcanons, too bad. I'm sure he's thought about it before, but never really took time to truly consider it, especially with his deteriorating mental health and a marriage that has lost it's meaning long ago

-He's always had Champ to look at as his baby. His spoiled little baby at that. But now that he isn't with his ex-wife anymore, and is now in a happier relationship (with you, dear reader) having a kid or two might be something for him to start considering, might

-The pregnancy was definitely unplanned. A little "oops" if I may. It was nervewracking to tell him. How would he react? Does he even like kids? Could he handle being a dad?

-So, after some pep talk, you finally tell him. It doesn't register at first. KInda goes in one ear and out the other. It takes a few seconds of him blankly staring at you for him to finally understand what you said. And, surprisingly, he's ecstatic! Pick you up, swing you around, give you some smooches. Maybe some tears even shed

-But then the hard part starts, the big thing is that there's gonna have to be some changes (the crack addiction). After years of doing it, it's gonna be hell to quit. But if he kicks it now, it won't be a problem later when the baby is born. So be ready to have a cranky Dude around. You're both gonna be taking care of each other during this time. He's gonna need a lot of support during this

-Once the rough part of withdrawls is over, and he starts feeling better, he'll be already coming up with ideas for the baby's room. I'd like to think that his trailer has two rooms, one the guys you sleep in, the other is probably where he keeps his weapons. So he's gonna have to find a new place to put all his weapons cause we can't have the new baby trying to use the Napalm Launcher... yet

-At some point, he's gonna question if staying in Paradise would be the best choice. He doesn't want his kid to get hurt or deal with the consequences of being his kid, so you guys might pack the trailer up and start anew somewhere else, let's just hope the chaos doesn't follow

-As the months go on, Dude will start to get anxious. He worries that he won't be a good dad for the little one. He never had a good relationship with his Father's, one's dead and the other he basically has no contact with. He knows you'd make an amazing parent, no doubt about it. But he will need a lot of reassuring that he'll make a good dad. Plz help him

-He's ready to deal with anything and everything you throw at him. Morning sickness, cravings, he will go out at 3am to get you whatever you're craving if it means making you happy. He'll let you lay around and do nothing while he takes care of the place. Hell, even Champ will be loving on you as well. Staying by your side during the whole pregnancy (Dude gets a little jealous)

-When it's baby time, he's in full panic mode. Speeding to the hospital and refusing to leave your side. He'd be ready to fight the doctors and nurses if they don't listen to you or are even slightly rude. By the time the baby is born, he's gonna have a broken hand by how hard you were gripping it and he almost got kicked out of the hospital three times

-So now baby is born and Dude now has a new best friend. He just met his kid and he's already planning all the fun chaos the two will have. He's so excited to finally be able to hold his baby. He already knew he was gonna spoil the fuck out of them

-He's a lot more of an active dad than you'd think he'd be. He's rather a night owl so he doesn't mind being the one who's getting up to take care of the baby, he wants you to get your rest.

-Is the type to get the baby onesies that say things like, "I can't fucking read". He thinks it's hilarious. And if you don't stop him, he'll be trying to teach the kid how to swear and flip people off.

-The type of dad you'll catch sitting at the tiny kids table with your kid, wearing a tiara and getting his nails done by your kid. Yes, he will wear a dress if his kid asks. How is he supposed to say no to such an adorable face?

-He can't help but spoil them. Again, he struggles to say no to them. He would kill for his kid. He would steal toys for them as well. He will shank a bitch for an American Girl doll, he doesn't care. His child NEEDS this doll, and he will stop at nothing to get them what they want

-He will teach his kid how to defend themselves. He doesn't trust people and he wants to make sure his kid is safe. He'll be gifting his kid weapons once they turn 13. The kid will have an alarming knowledge about different types of weapons

-He doesn't want his kid seeing him killing people. He knows how traumatizing it can be to see such a thing. He'd feel so horrible if he was the cause of his kid's trauma. But he sees his kid kill someone, he's helping with hiding the body. If they're killing someone, then clearly that person was in the wrong cause his kid can do no wrong

-He really do be a dad that is chill and you can tell everything to. If his kid is in deep trouble, they know they can call their dad to help. Very rarely will Dude ever be mad at his kid. They have to do something really horrible for him to be upset with them. He's also the type of dad who wouldn't care if his kid smokes and/or drinks. He'd smoke with his kid if it didn't make his schizophrenia worse

-So to finally end this long post, Dude would be a good dad. He wouldn't be perfect, but he's trying. He would want the best for them. He does get overprotective of them as well. He'd be a content man in life with his family. Ain't nothing gonna ruin it <3

[arkngth]

Antonio doodle/info dump since he was around last month :3

left is the most recent doodles before i knew he'd be coming back

right is the first drawings of him (coincidentally exactly a year ago from June 1st)

more uncolored doodles n sketches. i kinda draw Antonio the most, but i rarely post about him (been gatekeepmaxxing)

last drawings that i actually still kinda like.. i have much more, i just don't like how they look anymore lmao

rambling wall of text infodump below the cut cuz i am just so autistic about this character LMAO sorry i'm a yapper-

anyway, contrary to popular belief, Antonio is actually my favorite RP character. just in general. and i've never actually seen him live until the other day. unbeknownst to me, i was waiting for a whole year to be able to actually see him live, i think i was more excited about it than cc!anthony was 💀

which might contribute to my love for him bc i had to piece him together like a puzzle from everyone else's POVs and clips n stuff. so at first i didn't want him to come back bc i was afraid he'd be different from the Antonio i made up in my head... but then. i haven't sat n watched, at mostly full attention, a whole stream for 7 hours in a while LOL

when i watched cc!buddha's rdrp vods a year ago n saw Antonio, i thought to myself "oh no... Tony isn't actually my new muse is he...?". and for a while i didn't draw him bc i didn't have any ideas + i didn't really know how to draw him. but i did know that when i did learn how to draw him, it'd be over for me (i wouldn't want to draw anyone else, and i was right oops 😭)

my idea of Antonio is he's just a dumb, impulsive, silly little theatre kid that got wrapped up in being an outlaw bc of Wu n Dot after his house burned down. they woulda been moving around in old box cars wherever the trains took them. Dot dies before the events of WildRP(headcanon), and Wu to me, is the autistic kid that follows Antonio around bc he talks a lot n has charisma lolol. also, to me, Wu is not as evil as he was intended to be, he just follows in Sonny's footsteps who's calculated n violent. While Antonio chooses Cesare's path to be more diplomatic and focuses more on his reputation. Antonio can't win a fight to save his life, and i love him for it. he thinks he's scary n dangerous, but to me, he couldn't hurt a fly hehe. i mean, one of the first things he did in the crossing was host a talent show at the local theatre. i'm a big fan of pathetic men, what can i say.

speaking of, i love how pathetically in love he is with Renni. and i love how, despite how much they like each other, they never actually get together n still respect each other as friends. they are the embodiment of the saying "if you love something let it go, if it comes back its yours" but without the last part.. they are so tragic to me.

in the last 3.5 years of watching rp, i've never had any character or character dynamic make me cry. like, as much as i love how doomed n toxic Donnie/Lang is, i've teared up a bit, but they've never made me cry just thinking about them. but Antonio, n by extension, his relationship with Renni, has made me cry multiple times just thinking about them 😭 and yeah, i cried the other day when Antonio was thinking about Renni LOL

idk why he's the character that changes my brain chemistry, but uh. he is. i've literally never rambled about a character so much online, sorry for the great wall of text bc of it.. i'm usually masking so hard a lot of the time, but i've been wanting to talk about Antonio for so long with no one to yap to so, yknow.. he gets me to unmask and i also love him for that :']

[retrobr]

Lazytown Shenanigans Pt. 6

Yesterday I completely forgot to write a new post and only remembered to do it now... But we're back, dear people, and this time I'll ramble about only one episode: "The Last SportsCandy."

This time I took a couple of screenshots because one person asked me to do it, so that you understand what I'm talking about in some parts of this post 🙏

Well, let's begin!

"The Last SportsCandy."

The episode started with Robbie searching for Sportacus and wanting to feed him a sugar apple once again. Well, what can I say, the simp is simping as always, good for him /hj

But these dorks weren't the most important part of the episode, since, oh my god, there was something more interesting than that (I'm surprising myself a little by saying that to be honest), because the episode in general really was interesting to watch for me.

Before I get to the most exciting part of the episode, I want to point out that the scene in which Meanswell threw a sack at Stingy and made him shut up brought me a different kind of joy. 😈

Ok well, let's talk about the key part of the episode, finally. I should declare that Robbie is a fucking genius for making a time travel machine. I can't even imagine how he knew the mechanics of time travel and was able to make this idea a reality. And all that time travel concept is SO FREAKING AMAZING in my opinion, because we got to see some more different locations and even new characters once again!!

First of all, I will touch on the topic of the 1950s location. GUYS. THE WAY I GASPED WHEN I SAW THIS.

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THOSE VIBES OF THE 50-80S' AND THIS SCENE MADE ME SO GIDDY AND HAPPY AND-

AND WAIT WAIT OMG IS THAT A REAL JOHNNY B??? I MEAN THIS GUY'S OUTFIT LOOKS IDENTICAL TO JOHNNY'S AND WELL. I THINK YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN (if that's really him I'm going to cry out of joy, one of my favorite characters got some more screentime 😭)

And I am genuinely interested to know who these guys are. I sat for a long time, racking my head, trying to figure out who these guys were, but I had no idea. Maybe that's some of Lazytown's citizens who used to live there?..

(if they are not some canonical characters, I should make that blonde girl one of my original characters-)

Let's move on to the time when Johnny SportsCandyseed used to live (unfortunately I didn't remember the exact year, my apologies). OH MY GOD I REALLY LOVED THAT ONE AS WELL. I loved the monochromatic image of this time very much

AND GOOD LORD. ROBBIE'S — or, to be more precise, that Robbie version's — OUTFIT. JUST TAKE A LOOK (I also attached a clearer version; it's saved on my phone for some reason, and I don't remember where I found it)

It gives me the Wild West vibes, like really bad. If you guys follow me because of my NatM stuff, you know for sure how much I'm fond of those cowboy and Wild West themes, and Robbie's outfit kinda looks like it.

Also I'm really interested in knowing who this guy on the left is (maybe I'm just stupid and they said who he is in the episode, but I have no idea tbh)

At first I thought they were both some kind of odd version of Robbie and Sportacus (because the guy on the left looks somewhat like Robbie and Johnny's voice sounds very similar to Sportacus' to my hearing), although that's not true lol. I'm just silly

But I should say that Johnny is probably my new favorite Lazytown character. He is such a silly and goofy man, I'm not sure why but I really like him 🥺💜

I think that's all I wanted to say about the time-traveling part. Also I may be mistaken, but Robbie's "Oops, I did it again" line from the song was a reference to Britney Spears' song. You can hit me baby one more time on my head if I'm wrong guys, I don't mind /j

In the final part of this rambling I would like to say that I was so fucking amused at the rescue scene; the way Sportacus dropped Robbie like a sack of potatoes (while he was in a literal sack) CRACKED ME UP, WHAT WAS THAT 😭😭

In general, I quite liked that episode, mostly because of the aforementioned new characters and locations. It was very well done and shown, and because of that I can say that this episode borders on being my favorite 🤓👍

Thank you guys for your attention, as always. Have a good day 💜

[spacefinch]

Star Wars Rebels Incorrect Quotes

Ezra: *pulls out lightsaber* We have ways of making you talk.

Imperial officer: *nervous*

Ezra: *cuts cake*

Imperial officer: Can I have some?

Kanan: Cake is for talkers.

Mart: Big mood.

Rex: What does that mean?

Mart: Well, it kinda means, like, me too, I guess.

Rex: Thanks kid.

*1 week later at a command briefing*

Commander Sato: I’m kind of worried about this mission.

Rex: Big mood, Commander, big mood.

Sato: Mart, what did you do?

Rebel soldier, throwing a detonator: YEET!

Sato: Excuse me?

Soldier: You see, Mart told me—

Sato: WHEN WILL YOU PEOPLE LEARN?

Inquisitor: IS THAT THE BEST YOU CAN DO?

Ezra: Look, I’m 15. I’m trying very hard. You gotta work with me here, bud!

Zeb: Here’s the plan.

Zeb: I go in.

Zeb: I start hitting people hard in the face.

Zeb: And we see where that takes us.

Hera: No.

Kanan: This is not the time for your shenanigans.

Ezra: It was a single shenanigan.

Ezra: I have cat-like reflexes.

Sabine: Prove it.

Ezra: *sees a cat*

Ezra (instantly): I like that cat.

Spaceport desk person: Would a Commander Sato please come to the front desk?

Sato, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?

Desk person: I believe they belong to you?

Ezra and Sabine, simultaneously: We got lost.

Sato: I didn’t even bring you two here with me.

Ezra: On a scale of one to ten, how bad do you think it would be if—

Kanan: At least twenty.

Ezra: Oh, just so you know, it’s very muggy outside.

Hera: Ezra, I swear, if I step outside and all of our mugs are there..

Hera: [Gives Zeb the Look of Disappointment]

Zeb: [sips coffee from bowl]

Sabine: [locked up by the Inquisitor]

Sabine: [mockingly] Oh look, I’m the Inquisitor.

Sabine [slips metal pin from boot]: I’m a big scary guy with a red lightsaber.

Sabine: [begins to pick the lock on the cell door] I’m going to hunt down all the Jedi and their rebel friends.

Sabine: Gonna lock up the girl instead of killing her because she’s not really dangerous to my evil master plans.

Sabine: [kicks down the door]: Oops, she got out.

Sabine: I have a plan.

Kanan: It can’t involve blowing stuff up.

Sabine: I have no plan.

[Explosion in background]

Ezra [off camera]: This was a horrible idea.

Zeb [also off camera]: THIS WAS YOUR IDEA, EZRA!

Ezra: It’s time for Plan B.

Sabine: We have a Plan B?

Ezra: No, but it’s time for one.

Mart: I have a question.

Wolffe: Okay, shoot.

Mart: [shoots blaster at the ceiling] All right, can I ask it now?

Kanan: Go clean your bunker.

Ezra: [waves hand] I don’t need to clean my bunker.

Kanan: [waves hand] Yeah, you do.

Jonner: Oh, that’s so nice, you brought us snacks!

Mart, holding the snacks close: I never said that.

Sato: What is the proper way to deal with someone annoying you?

Ezra: A lightsaber.

Sato: No.

Ezra: Two lightsabers.

Sato: No!

Hera: I’m leaving. Kanan’s in charge while I’m gone. I’ve left notes for each of you with instructions.

Ezra: Mine just says “Ezra, no.”

Hera: And you can apply that to any situation.

Mart: If you had to separate your Loth-cat from 49 other identical Loth-cats that were all equally excited to see you, how would you determine which one is yours?

Ezra: Easy. I would take all 50 Loth-cats home.

Hera: So how are you and Chopper getting along?

Sato: I think he’s finally warming up to me.

Sato: [sees Chopper rolling by]

Sato: Hey, Chopper.

Chopper: [zaps him]

Sato: It’s a work in progress.

Ezra: Here is my award for the most direct orders ignored.

Kanan: That’s not an award. That is an angry letter from Commander Sato.

Ezra: Well, it says most, so I’m calling it an award.

Zeb: [sitting outside listening to the radio]

[something explodes in distance]

Zeb: [turns up the volume]

Sato: Are you in my ceiling, Bridger?

Ezra [muffled]: No.

Sabine: How’s it going?

Kanan: Fine. Except for this headache that comes and goes.

Rex: [enters the room]

Kanan: And it’s back.

Sabine: [looks right]

Sabine: [looks left]

Sabine: [runs through hallway] I’m such a good spy. I’m so sneaky.

Ezra: [in the vent above her; can hardly keep himself from laughing]

Phoenix Squadron Rule #56: No, the command ship isn’t haunted, it’s just Ezra in the vents.

Mart: I am the most responsible person here.

Gooti: But you just flooded the bunker.

Mart: Yes, and I take full responsibility for that.

[record scratch] [freeze frame]

Mart, narrating: Yup, that’s me. Mart Mattin Sato. Now, you’re probably wondering how I ended up in this situation.

Mart: I have two best friends I go to for advice.

Mart: One rationalizes, uses logic. and the other one hypes me up to do dumb stuff.

Mart: Balance.

Sato: For this mission we need a good pilot. Anyone interested?

Mart: [raises hand]

Sato: [sigh] Someone who doesn’t want to wreck their starfighter?

Mart: [puts hand down slowly]

Wolffe: I thought you said you knew how to fly this thing.

Mart: I said “how hard could it be?”

Wolffe: No, don’t hit the button, just press it, gently.

Mart: I am pressing it gently! It’s not working!

Ezra: You can drink drinks but you can’t food foods.

Kanan: Excuse me?

Sabine: Eza has no survival skills. His need to win has replaced them.

Mart: That can’t be true.

Sabine: Watch this. Ezra, race you downstairs!

Ezra: [shatters the window with his lightsaber] [jumps out the window] [parkours all the way to the ground]

Mart: I see what you mean.

Imperial officer: I have an army.

Sato: We have a Jedi.

Kanan: Let’s go to your happy place. Think of things you love.

Ezra: My family, the color orange…

Kanan: Okay.

Ezra: Loth-cats, Jedi stuff…

Kanan: Good.

Ezra:

The Sith Holocron

Kanan: No!

Zeb: What are you going to do?

Ezra: I don’t know. Something dramatic, I hope.

Wolffe: Do you know how to fly this thing?

Mart: We’ll see.

Wolffe: That’s a yes or no question.

Mart: Yes.

Kanan: Is everything a joke to you?

Ezra: Funny things are.

Rex: Hey kid, have you seen my helmet anywhere?

Ezra [wearing Rex’s helmet]: No. Can’t say I have, sir.

Ezra: So I have some good news and some bad news.

Sato: Good news first.

Ezra: Well, the ejector seats in the A-wings work amazing, sir.

Ezra: [trying to climb onto the roof to do a backflip off the roof]

Kanan: [Trying to stop Ezra]

Chopper: [Cheering Ezra on]

Zeb: [making a bet with Sabine on whether or not Ezra will hurt himself]

Hera, looking into the camera like she’s on The Office: I need new teammates.

[while stuck on Phoenix Nest]

Sabine: I know what to do! We should play another game of hide and seek!

Ezra: Oh no, never again.

Sabine: Why not?

Ezra: You left me in the vents last time!

Sabine: IT WAS ONE TIME!

Ezra: I WAS THERE FOR TWO DAYS!

Kanan: It’s quiet. Too quiet.

[blaster bolt barely misses him]

Kanan: To be honest, I preferred the quiet.

Mart: Four months?

Jonner: What is he talking about?

Gooti: It’s not that big of a deal-

Mart: You stood by and watched me water a fake plant for FOUR MONTHS?!

Hera: I can’t submit this mission report. Who wrote it?

Kanan: Why, what does it say?

Hera: All it says its “Bad guys went pew-pew, we went pew-pew better.”

Ezra: … Was I wrong, though?

Kanan, exasperated, in Ezra’s direction: YOU ARE A BOY, NOT A TREE!

Kanan: [casually blocks incoming blaster fire with his lightsaber]

Sabine: [resting face while throwing a detonator into the stormtroopers’ midst]

Hera: While Kanan and I are gone, you’re in charge, Ezra.

Ezra: YES!

Hera to Sabine: You’re secretly in charge.

Sabine: Obviously.

Ezra: [suspiciously walking away from Kanan’s room, snickering]

Hera: Ezra!

Ezra: What?

Hera: I was just looking for you.

Ezra: Why? I didn’t do anything.

Hera: What?

Ezra: What?

Hera: [gives Ezra the Look] What did you do?

Kanan: [walks in with whipped cream on his face] It’s not funny. I was sleeping peacefully. Very funny, Ezra.

Ezra, laughing: I didn’t.. I didn’t do it.

Kanan: Uh, well, Sabine…. I don’t appreciate—

Sabine: Don’t look at me!

Kanan: Okay, well, Hera!

Hera: Nope.

Kanan: Well, who was it then? I know it was one of you!

Sato: [smiles]

[creature roaring in background]

Ezra: DUDES! YOU’RE ON YOUR OWN! [runs away]

Sato: I am at a loss for words.

[cut to shot of Mart looking straight at the camera like he’s on The Office]

Mart: Despite being at a loss for words, my uncle scolded me for three minutes straight.

Imperial officer: Your insolence goes too far!

Ezra: Wrong. It can go a lot further.

Ezra: [reminds Sato of his younger self]

Sato: I like this kid, he’s my son now.

Kanan: Wha- wait! I already called it!

Sato: Where’s Ezra?

Rex: Doing stuff.

Sato: Then where’s Kanan?

Rex: Trying to stop Ezra from doing stuff.

Sato: So where is Sabine?

Rex: Stopping Kanan from stopping Ezra from doing stuff.

Sato: If they’re doing all that, why are you out here?

Rex: Someone has to keep you distracted, Commander.

Chopper: (translated from droid binary) <I despise you with every inch of my being.>

Mart: Well, it isn’t a lot of inches.

Ezra, barely holding Chopper back: RUN

Mart: THE FLOOR IS LAVA!

Hera: *helps Sabine onto the couch*

Chopper: *pushes Ezra off a chair*

Mart: As you can see, there are two types of people.

Mart: We have good news and bad news.

Gooti: Okay, bad news first.

Jonner: The fire we started in the bunker is out of control—

Gooti: THE WHAT—

Mart, holding a perfectly roasted marshmallow: Wow, so you don’t even care about the good news?

Ezra: I’m in me mum’s car, vroom vroom.

Hera: Get out of me car!

Ezra: Aww.

🎵You are my dad🎵

YOU’RE MY DAD!

🎵Boogie woogie woogie🎵

— Ezra to Kanan

Hera: Let me see what you have!

Chopper: *droid sounds* (translation: A knife!)

Hera: NO!

Ezra: 🎶 I want to see my little boy 🎶

Sabine: *holding Loth-cat* Here he comes!

Ezra: 🎶 I want to see my little boy 🎶

Mart, Gooti, and Jonner (gathered around a lettuce): Cabbasu, cabbasu, cab-a-su, LETTASU, LETTASU, LETTASUUUUUU!

Ezra: On all levels except physical, I am a Loth-wolf. *barks*

Mart: Hey did you hear that Joe contracted ligma? They had to do a surgery on his updog.

Sato: Who’s Joe? What’s ligma? What’s updog?

Mart: *inhales*

Sato's revenge:

Mart: Hey uncle, what are you eating?

Sato: I'm having jogan fruit and amatta. Do you want some?

Mart: What's amatta?

Sato: Nothing. What's ammatta with you?

[swearyshera]

Alice,

I've loved being able to read Sweary She-Ra through the years. I happened upon it only a few months after finishing She-Ra (I was late to the party due to not having Netflix, oops), and it gave me so much wonderful content to keep my excitement for the series alive.

The way you explored the characters, especially Catra's mental health and her relationship with Shadow Weaver, helped give me a new understanding and greater appreciation of them. I bring up Catra specifically because, I'll be honest, I wasn't a big Catra fan for awhile. I liked her well enough, then kinda didn't in season 4, but grew fond of her again around season 5. But you helped me understand her thought-process, and I came to like her more because of it. I really like that you also handled her in a nuanced way, where, as you've said many times, you explained her behavior without excusing it, and that made all the difference.

One of the things I really appreciated about your take on She-Ra was how apparent your intelligence was, as well as your writing skill. It wasn't just "Catra says fuck and Glimmer has killed dozens," even though it could have been--you went the extra mile (or kilometer, since you're British :P) and gave us a variety of jokes, as well as mood shifts from comedic to tragic to dramatic to hopeful. All of the characters felt like themselves, even though they were pushed up to 11 and had some creative liberties taken, such as Frosta being a demon and Hordak's Geordie accent. You had a good handle on all of them, which can be very hard to do with a large cast, especially one written by another writer.

I also really appreciated that you took the time to answer asks and build a community here. It gave us lovely jokes such as Bob (that's right, I haven't forgotten about him), Catra's age, and Entrapta reading our comments. I've always been very shy online, but seeing you having such nice interactions with fans helped me open up, and I'm glad I did! I used to ask anonymously from time to time (yes, my first ask was about DT, all the way back during your start on season one, what else would it be? XD), and I'm glad I've gotten to chat and joke with you, as have the rest of us.

I'm so glad that you stuck with this and created such a wonderful fan-series. We never got a movie, but this was just as good, in my opinion. It was like watching SPOP for the first time all over again. I'm excited to see what you create next, be it SPOP-related or not. I hope the future has great things in store for you.

You brought us laughs, tears, and spectacular Glimmer-swears, and your blog means so much to so many people. You mean so much to so many people. I hope you find success in your future endeavors!

FOR THE HONOR OF GAYSKULL!

What can I say, it's truly been an honour (of Gayskull) to write something that I had no idea brought so much to many people. I'm genuinely quite humbled by the reaction.

I always wanted to be fair to all the characters, to show their reasons without necessarily validating the invalid stuff that they've done, and that particularly came across with Catra. It's no secret that I see a lot of parallels between her and my own history, but I've applied the same take-no-shit but be kind approach that I took with myself over the years. And I've learned a lot about mental health during that time, so I could give that sometimes painful realism, but also know just how to make fun of it in the right way.

In some ways, I feel like the characters I've written have taken on their own personality that's very distinct from the original, and that's probably why I think there's a little more mileage in them yet. Both in terms of original stuff (my pilot script Snowflakes has almost 1:1 versions of DT and Perfuma!), but also in the possibility for creating more Sweary stuff, and that is slowly taking shape - although I am taking it easy for a bit, I've already outlined a story which I'd love to make into an audio drama. Currently workshopping it with a couple of people, so watch this space...

It has been a joy to get so many asks from people, yourself included, and my inbox will always be open. I'm not going anywhere for a while! You were very much my DT-asker-in-chief, and I'm super glad you enjoyed their scenes (heck, you even got them a cameo at the end!). So thank you immensely for the support.

I'm happy I've been able to contribute to a wonderful fandom in such a way, and I'm eager to keep on giving back to a community that has given me so many amazing friends.

FOR THE HONOR OF GAYSKULL!

[tradetobest]

hello user cats0p... long time lurker but only recently back to tumblr.com because i HAVE to ask more about your golf au and after my anon q was well received i just. i need to know more. here are some of my thoughts:

1634 my faves... i'm so caught on your vague deliberation between auston just being Rich Guy or Auston Matthews because:

regular guy is interesting bc it's so approachable and unassuming... like, he's just some guy. which isn't, like, unapproachable or unreachable by any means, even if he is really big and hot and presumably makes enough money to be spending his evenings at a country club and not at work and kinda feels like he's being flirted with but surely not because... this guy probably has a wife and kids?? but he's always eyeing mitch up and trying to tip him even when mitch isn't even supposed to take tips like that

but hockey auston is like... mitch is in overdrive bc [jennifer lawrence voice] what do you MEAN mitch's favorite leaf and savior of the toronto maple leafs is trying to chat him up at his cart?? i feel like this avenue would be WAY more overwhelming for mitch because he doesn't know how to approach it and isn't sure what the norms are... like is he allowed to tell auston that he played like crazy on sunday and it was so sick, or that he threw his hat at the game against florida two years ago when auston got a hat trick, and not to mention it makes mitch that much MORE dubious to believe auston is flirting with him or that he'd ever have a chance w him...

like both are so so good to consider on all fronts but i'm so enchanted by the idea of auston like... purposely fucking up his drive just to be like oop mitch... sorry you know what a klutz i am i fucked up the green over here again. and auston's friends are all loitering by the cart/ordering drinks and he's the one standing over mitch asking how he even ended up doing something like this and if he likes it and what he's doing over the weekend... and sweet mitchy is so oblivious but excited to talk to him as he patches up whatever hole auston has carved out of the green. his golf score is suffering (as is his wallet seeing as loser buys dinner) but he can't say getting to talk to mitch isn't worth it...

2. i cannot get over little server boy tz... just imagining him in his little tan cargo shorts taking drink orders and letting people's moms do shots with him... i know he dropped so many cocktails when he started serving people. passing his disposable vape of the day to the bartender and trying to get them to make him a drink that tastes like mago blue tropical razz ice or whatever other ridiculous flavor he's trying and failing to be subtle about sucking down that day. lamenting over the blue eyed hottie who is always around his family (and therefore very hard to hit on) who orders virgin frozen pina coladas (and come on, trevor could do SO MUCH with that if he just had time to get one line laid on him without his mom watching)...

3. i don't really go here but... all of the golf course/country clubs i've ever been to have had pools/gyms/kids clubs and... have you considered spin class instructor matthew knies OR kids club employee joseph woll... i know kniesy would be cougar nip but also that woller would be irresistible watching over a bunch of kiddos while their parents are out getting drunk by the pool/on the green...

apologies for the length but i'm in love w this little world you've made and i'd love to hear more about it!!

HIII OH MY GOD YOU DONT KNOW HOW HAPPY GETTING THIS MADE ME I LITERALLY SCREAMED!!! AAAA HELLO!!!!

i think while reading this i mustve said "you get me" fully out loud at least 12 times while reading this because like. you just get me... you Understand....

the 1634 dilemma is so real... like normie but rich auston trying to slip mitch a 20 and mitch going "oh like turf people dont really get tipped" and auston going "no its for you" and mitch smiling and going "aww thanks!! :D" and just Not getting it and auston is trying SO hard

but also Leafs Auston is soooo compelling to me when you wrote it out like that idek.... mitch going internally "oh god can i tell him i know who he is" and saying "yeah uhh,,, good shot. as usual haha" after auston takes a drive and being all nervous meanwhile auston is like "oh my god he knows who i am do you think hes impressed by me" and outward is like "thanks man." and claps him on the shoulder. and is like "oh my god i touched him."

auston on the tee box like "oh man mitch i mustve pulled something last night exercising my big strong muscles can you help correct my swing" and mitch going "sure (dying)" and coming up behind him and auston like slightly leaning over into him and mitch like. dies. passes away. rip mitch marner. and then for the next like 5 times he sees auston he blushes IMMEDIATELY. very cute

2. tz is absolutely obsessed w jamie like thats so real.... always talking abt him and everything... jack is so sick of his ass but jack "just doesn't get it, dude, he's so hot. look at him. sitting there." and jack looks over and jamie is wincing bcs he got brain freeze from his fucking virgin pina colada that he orders every time and jack just has to look over and watch trevor pop another zyn and say nothing. save him nico. nico save him.

3. OOO thats so smart and cute actually i love that!! my club didnt have that probably because the clientele were mostly older but like... having that is Smart. and like... a gym and classes open up So Many More job possibilities,,,, a sweaty just-out-the-gym kniesy like going down the hall and knocking lightly on the kids club door and hearing a "COMING!" and woller opens the door and he has like. a heart sticker on his cheek and his hair in pigtails and a little bit of marker on his forehead and kniesy feels his heart grow like. ten sizes. maybe woller takes the kids out to the pool and kniesy can see them and jsut... eyes. he purposefully books a water fitness course so that maybe woller can watch him in the pool too..... thats SOOOO REALNESS oh my god

please forever continue to send me little ideas abt this no matter how short or how long i love them all like i literally have been thinking abt this All Day and its been making me so happy..... RAHH like. THEM!!! THEY!!! im so happy you like my silly lil au that basically came out of me going "oh my adhd ass loved this job im sure mitch would love it too!!" ilysm thank you for sending me another ask about this

[librathefangirl]

i need to know about all of these fics NOW (no pressure take your time ofc ofc)

Wrath of a Captain

Moment of Rest (a Decade Too Late)

Hitmen!Demon bros AU

Galand exposes Meliodas' demon secret

How to Demon (Yes, Captain, This is Really Necessary)

Meliodas and the Kids AU #1

also never realized how silly i name my documents till now 😭😭😭‼️‼️‼️

Ahh hearing you excited about all these is making me excited to write them again (hoping to get back to writing more soon - october was a mess and a half :( but I have 2 whumptober fics that I almost finished that should maybe might be posted soon?)

Okay so...

Wrath of a Captain

Fun fact about this one is that it was one of (possibly the) first nnt fic ideas I wrote down when I first got into the fandom. Tho in what - 1-1,5 years? - I've still barely started writing it (oops). But not for lack of interest! I'm still excited about this one, I just haven't been able to specify the scenario enough to start writing (I keep getting distracted by other fic ideas lol).

To summarize the idea in three words: Protective Captain Meliodas.

And here's a rough summary I wrote for myself:

The Seven Deadly sins were a well-known force only fools would take lightly. Though faced with a captain that was small and short, and seemed the complete opposite of wrath itself, it was easy to underestimate him. But just because the captain didn't get angry, didn't mean he never got close. Especially if one were foolish enough to dare attack his team.

A Moment of Rest (a Decade Too Late)

This is a fic I started this summer and then kinda forgot about (oh the art of finishing a fic before moving on to the next one). It takes place after the Capital of the Dead arc and deals with the aftermath of Sins being split-up for 10 years from King's perspective. Now, I can't remember, if it originally was supposed to be "Meliodas was alone for 10 years" angst or "Meliodas was alone for 10 years and demons don't do well in isolation" angst, but it's probably gonna end up being the second one now. Which means the rest of the Sins, while not knowing Meliodas' full story, knows he is a demon and how these past 10 years would have affected him because of it.

Here's a little sneak peek:

The princess had already retired into the Boar Hat, while Ban had simply settled for grabbing Meliodas and sprawling out on the ground. He wasn’t sleeping. His ease was a facade at best. King knew that he too was plagued by these past ten years, and the guilt they brought. It had never been supposed to go this far… Meliodas seemed dazed. A state hopefully only brought forth by the lull of sleep slowly claiming him. He wasn’t quite asleep yet though. To an outsider he might have seemed to be, but King knew him better. His guard was still firmly up, although slowly but surely being picked apart by Ban’s hand repeatedly running through his hair. Meliodas was curled up tighter than he normally would, yet at the same time more relaxed than King had seen him since before they were framed. His head was neatly tucked on top of Ban’s chest. Ear over his heart, no doubt. He’d always had a particular fondness of that, their captain. Easily soothed by the beat of a heart – by the beat of their hearts at least.

Hitmen!Demon bros AU

Oooh this one. thiiiis one! I'm still mostly in the planning stage for this one, but I can't wait until I get to share the full thing with you all. Like the name suggests, it's a modern (possibly slight futuristic) AU where the DK raised his sons as hitmen. It's gonna be a multichapter fic (probably my longest wip yet) and there will be lots of demon bros angst!

Fun fact, while the I had thought about this AU a bit, I wasn't necessarily planning on writing it at first. Then my mind provided me with this super angsty demon bros scene and an awful chapter cliffhanger, and well, now I'm invested. I need to know how this story ends. (If this sounds familiar, I did mention this once before).

Anyway, I have written the first 300-something words, setting up the angst before a jump back in time, so here's a sneak peek:

Perhaps one of the most defining moments in Meliodas’ life happened on January 29th the year he was turning 26. The day Meliodas found himself on a rooftop staring down his own little brother, a raised gun in both their hands aimed at each other. The only sound was the falling rain as the world itself seemed to hold its breath waiting for who would make the first move. At that moment, Meliodas had thought he had known exactly how the day would end. He had known it in the calculating part of his mind that he never could quite shut off, and had felt it in his heart that seemed to break every time he saw his little brother. He had thought he knew what would happen. He had been wrong. Everybody has a choice, but sometimes it doesn’t matter what you chose.

Galand exposes Meliodas' demon secret

Now this one I've shared a bit about before - partly to complain about my (still going strong) habit of stopping my writing in the middle of a sentence. Sadly, I haven't really made any progress since then. Mostly because I can't remember where tf the story was supposed to go (did I even have a plan?? I found the story aka the snippet of writing in a school notebook I hadn't used for months, so who knows).

Anyway! What I do know is that Galand fucks everything up on purpose, and is the one to reveal Meliodas' demon secret to the rest of the Sins. How the story continues from there, well, I'll figure that out eventually. For now, the last part of the fic looks like this:

It had all started with a confrontation with one of the Ten Commandments. Galand of Truth. He hadn’t even seemed to be looking for a fight – not in that moment anyway – King had noticed. He’d just been there to stir up trouble. Always playing games as usual¸ Meliodas had said. Well, games or not, Galand really had caused trouble. The demon had been quick to pick up on the rest of the Seven Deadly Sins’ surprise that Meliodas seemed to know him personally, and then deduced...DEDUCED WHAT??

How to Demon (Yes, Captain, This is Really Necessary)

This is actually a request/fic idea I got from a reader on ao3. It's also mostly still in the planning stage, having taken a backseat to my Febuwhump fic. But the idea is basically Melin giving a lesson on demons to the Sins with the (reluctant) aid of Meliodas. Or in other words, Merlin is sick of being (almost) the only one who knows how to keep Mel alive and will make it everybody's probably whether they want to or not. It'll also take place in the same AU as The Heat of the Storm (which means more of my demon thermoregulation, yay! - oh, actually, sidenote: I'm working on a post about that hc).

So, we'll have random demon lore/headcanons/stuff, some humor, and, of course, angst (probably more angst than should come from this otherwise humorous idea).

Meliodas and the Kids AU #1

The first of (at least) three fics taking place in the Meliodas and the Kids AU (aka Meliodas Adopts the Sins). In this AU, instead of the Sins becoming knights together way down the line, Meliodas ends up adopting/taking them in as kids* over the years.

Now, I use the term kids loosely here since neither King nor Gowther will actually be kids in the normal sense. But Gowther will be on his own for the first time and also still new to the world, and King, well, I still got some ideas for his relationship with Mel (and also, he is still significantly younger than Mel, so I say he still counts as his kid).

This first fic will consist of six chapters (one for each "kid"), exploring how Meliodas ended up taking them all in, and the dynamics of this mismatched little family (mostly the kids relationships' with Mel).

(Also Elizabeth is probably gonna be dead-dead in this AU).

Here's a sneak peek from the first (Merlin's) chapter:

When you find yourself stuck in time, it’s good to set up some rules for yourself, unless you want to lose yourself to madness. Meliodas didn’t have the luxury for madness. Madness was not going to solve anything. He would still be stuck here, unaging and undying, without an end in sight. Submitting to madness would also be admitting that the only purpose his life had left was suffering. An eternity alone in the human realm as a punishment for his crimes against the Demon King. His father was a huge asshole, okay? Meliodas was not about to give him the satisfaction of watching him break. So, he made some rules. The most important one was: do not get attached. [some other stuff not included in this sneak peek] Do not get attached. It was simple and important – and Meliodas had broken the rule before he had even made it.

(also I love your wip titles XD and will definitely send an ask for some ramblings of your own - but that will have to wait, I've got an 8am lecture in less than 7 hours and need to get some sleep, so Imma put a to be continued on the wip talk for now)

WIP Tag/Ask Game!

[raccoonfallsharder]

Window Across the Galaxy ✧*:･ﾟupdated 1/9

18+ only | rocket x f!oc | 24/27 chapters | wip| word count: pending. ♡ check the masterlist for expected updates ♡ ♡ see the "holiday special" ⋆꙳•̩̩͙❅*̩̩͙‧͙ Winter Across the Galaxy * ‧͙*̩̩͙❆ ͙͛ ˚₊⋆ [new 12/5] ♡

girl falls first; racoon falls harder.

When Rocket enters their new bunk, Jo’s sitting on the floor: leaning against the edge of the bed, working diligently on some kind of woven thing. It’s a tapestry of sorts, the threads and flosses all hand-laced together. She’s put most of her tools and equipment in a closet down the corridor, and she takes them out when she’s practicing a new skill or brushing up on old ones, working on these little low-cost, low-sentiment projects that are the only ones she’ll take on board, and only for a few days at a time. She pulls out her little tools and supplies, and sits on the floor in the common area or — now, apparently — in their new bunk. She works, and then she packs up all her small things, and she takes them back out and tucks them out of sight in the closet once more. The idea of it gets under his skin, to be honest. A closet. Jo’s been shrinking her life ever since she met him, and he should probably back up out of it before he makes things worse — but it’s too late for that now. He’s too greedy to do it, even though he knows he should. And besides — if he’s pretending to be altruistic — he’d promised to not run her off. So instead, he decides he’s gonna focus on making sure she puts her name on every goddamn surface she can, everywhere they go.

[NEW 1/9] ✧･ﾟ:*Chapter XXIV. Space Would Be Better. in which Rocket ~ discreetly ~ claims the title of boyfriend. ❤︎❤︎

this was originally the last half of Chapter XXIII (the previous chapter) so if it starts a bit rough, i'm so sorry. as a result, we do jump into some smut pretty quickly in this chapter so if you need to, make sure to check out the warnings in the closing notes. i'm really excited about the next chapter, too! which is less smutty and more feelings-ish. ~♡

explicit lines or references* abbreviated explicit sequences ❤︎ detailed/prolonged explicit sequences ❤︎❤︎

General summary/notes + links to recently preceding chapters behind the cut.

let me know via comment, message, or ask if you'd like to be added or removed from my fanfic taglist ♡

Rocket is captured by a Ravager crew hoping to get rich off the excessively large bounty on his head. Throwing a wrench in everyone’s plans is the Terran girl they hired to do some freelance assessing on a recent haul of goods they’ve seized from a Xandaran luxury liner. Oops.

slight AU starting pre-GOTG volume 1 (but will hit most of the same major plot points). slow burn + eventual smut with a lot of pining in the middle. kinda enemies-to-lovers? (but only one of these idiots thinks they're enemies).

let me be real with you: this fic is really about wish-fulfillment. not just the eventual smut (but that too). mostly i just want someone to be nice to my best boy raccoon

*･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ:*✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ*

Chapter I. A Delicacy. in which our reluctant heroes meet atop a crate of Sovereign porn in the bowels of a Ravager ship.

Chapter II. Monster For A Pet. in which one hero wrestles with his inner Groot, and the other is quite possibly a moron.

Chapter III. A Kindness. in which Rocket gets in his own damn way: not for the first time, and certainly not for the last.

Chapter IV. Got There First. in which our heroes obtain an arsenal and street food.

Chapter V. Things No-One Has Said Before. in which one hero refuses to babysit and the other refuses to leave.

Chapter VI. Two and a Half Billion Units.in which we lean into the “they were roommates” trope. Jolie has misgivings, while Rocket has fantasies - about getting rich, of course.

Chapter VII. I'm Here. in which we visit Knowhere.

Chapter VIII. The Care & Feeding of Human Pets. in which our heroes practice breathing and we lean into a new trope: “there was (technically) one bed.”

Chapter IX. Scrapmetal and a Dream. in which we redefine homemaking.

Chapter X. Thin Fucking Ice. in which our heroes get fucked. Not in the good way.

Chapter XI. Let It Be. in which Xandar is saved and good lives are lost.

Chapter XII. So Much It Hurts. in which we try not to fuck up the vibes.

Chapter XIII. Don’t Wait. in which a lost sister is found and Drax grapples with the concept of sarcasm.

Chapter XIV. Exactly Like a Flower. in which comfort is shared.

Chapter XV: Galaxy-Breaking Shit. in which more comfort is shared, and life is good. Briefly.

Chapter XVI. Run. in which Rocket falls victim to his superstitions.

Chapter XVII. A Seedling. A Fox. A Little Girl. in which the party is divided.

Chapter XVIII. I Happen to Know a Guy. in which our heroes get fucked. Again. Still not in the good way.

Chapter XIX. He Was Loved. in which a planet is killed, a friend is made and lost, and nobody still has any frickin’ tape.

Chapter XX. Some Nerve. *in which an ultimatum is given.

Chapter XXI. I Very Still. ❤︎❤︎ in which our heroes get fucked. In the good way, this time. Finally.

Chapter XXII. Got There Worse. ❤︎❤︎ in which Rocket does not say "I love you."

Chapter XXIII. We're Gonna Need a Bigger Table. ❤︎ in which the galaxy continues to spin.

Chapter XXIV. Space Would Be Better. ❤︎❤︎ in which Rocket ~discreetly~ claims the title of boyfriend.

Chapter XXV. Little Love Stories. *

Chapter XXVI. Other Side of the Window. ❤︎

Chapter XXV. The Most Beautiful Thing in My House. ❤︎❤︎

⋆꙳•̩̩͙❅*̩̩͙‧͙ Winter Across the Galaxy * ‧͙*̩̩͙❆ ͙͛ ˚₊⋆ A Holiday Special *

Epilogue: Interviewing Rocket & Jo. ten years after Window ends. short/drabbly, silly fluff.

explicit lines or references* abbreviated explicit sequences ❤︎ detailed/prolonged explicit sequences ❤︎❤︎

taglist ♡ @evolvingchaoswitch ♡ @wren-phoenix ♡ @pretty-chips ♡ @suicidalshitstick ♡ @glow-autumz

[lunatic-pudge]

The Great Swedish Fish Disaster

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Scout has a crush on Sniper and wants to help him with his Swedish Fish addiction) (Crack fic)

I'm not much of a character x character type of person. But this was a request and it was fuuny so who am I to say no to this. Please enjoy this mess. And yeah, it kinda ends abruptly, oops.

Requested by Gojifan1962

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sniper was an interesting man to say the least. He was a man who took his job seriously. Someone who would sit in one specific position for hours on end, just to get the one perfect shot. But yet, at the same time, he'd piss in jars, filling them to them brim and throwing them at unsuspecting victims. Cackling at them afterwards, mocking the poor piss-soaked person who was just trying to go about their day.

Sniper was such a strange man, and that's what Scout loved about him. He loved how polarizing Sniper was. But there was one problem though.

Sniper was an addict.

No, it wasn't to drugs or alcohol, he was smarter than that. No, it was something to much, much worse.

Swedish Fish.

Everywhere Sniper went, he had a pack of Swedish Fish with him. All of Sniper's little hiding spots, there were packs of Swedish Fish just waiting for him. And the worst place was his camper van. The man had two whole cabinets just dedicated to the red gummies! It was neverending.

It worried Scout. Though he was scared to admit it, he loved Sniper. He cared about the Aussie very much. So it worried him to see his beloved friend constantly munching on those damned fish. How had Sniper not grown sick of them yet? It was ridiculous. 

So here sat Scout in the rec room, thinking. Pyro sat beside him, scribbling away at their drawing. Scout tried to not pay too much attention to it, due to how graphic the drawing was. It was a strange mixture of cute and morbid. Scout needed help, and he figured it wouldn't hurt to ask the pyromaniac for some help.

"Hey, Py, you got a moment?"

"Hmm?" Pyro looked up from their drawing to Scout, head tilted in curiosity.

"I need some help. You ever notice how Sniper is always eating Swedish Fish?"

Pyro nodded.

"I think it's getting outta hand. I wanna help him get get off the stuff, but I don't really know how to." Scout sighed, shaking his head. Looking over to the other merc, hoping they'd offer something useful.

Pyro hummed, thinking for a moment before an idea came to mind. They got up, urging Scout to do the same. Taking the young merc's hand, Pyro mumbled out their little idea while walking out of the rec room.

~~

"Alright, I'll bite, where we going, mate?" Sniper asked, sitting blindfolded in the backseat of a car he was led to by Scout and Pyro. He knew this couldn't be good, when those two paired up disaster was always just around the corner.

"You'll see soon, Snipes. Just hang on a bit" Scout said, turning to look over at Pyro with a smirk. Scout was quite surprised when he found out Pyro could drive, though when asked about their license, Scout was just met with a blank and unnerving stare.

Scout was excited, he was finally gonna be able to help his crush kick his-

His thoughts were suddenly disrupted by the familiar sound of crinkling. That very familiar crinkling noise.

Whipping his head around, Scout stared in horror at Sniper.

"Snipes! What are you doing?"

"Nothing." Sniper said while casually popping a Swedish Fish in his mouth.

Scout stared blankly for a second before reaching over and snatching the bag from him. Sniper let out a screech, offended that his beloved candy was taken from him.

Sniper blindly reached forward, trying to find locate where Scout was. "Give it back, dickhead!"

"No" Scout moved away from Sniper's grabbing hands. "You don't need these, Sniper!"

"Who the hell are you to tell me what I can and can't have?"

"I'm trying to do what's best for you!"

"I swear to God, mate, if you don't give those back I'll-"

"Hmph hmph!" Pyro said, pulling in to park at their destination.

Sniper ripped the blindfold off and stared at the building, reading the name of it.

"Rehab?"

"Yeah, that's right" Scout started, "Sniper, you have a problem, and Pyro and I feel like the best way to squash this is to put you in rehab"

Sniper stared at Scout absolutely dumbfounded, "Mate, I don't have no addiction. I don't need no rehab. Besides, this is for people addicted to drugs and alcohol, not fuckin' candy."

"Yeah, whatever. Keep denying it all you want, that isn't gonna change anything. If you keep fighting this, I'll have Pyro tie you up, right, Py?" Scout looked over to Pyro who proceeded to hold up a scary amount of rope.

Sniper gave it, not wanting to deal with Pyro's wrath. The three proceeded to leave the car and enter the building, walking up to the receptionist desk. Sniper could already tell something bad was going to happen. Scout walks up to the desk, leaning against it, trying to look cool.

The receptionist looks up and smile gently, "Hello! How may I help you?"

"Hey, toots, I'm here to check my friend in. He's, like, a super addict and needs some serious help."

"Well, that's what we're here for. What is it that he's addicted to?"

"Swedish Fish." Scout proclaimed

...

"Excuse me?" The nurse looked at Scout, confused as to if she heard him correctly. "Did you say 'Swedish Fish'?"

"Yeah, I did. He's so crazy addicted to them. We keep finding him eating them, and even had to take them from him before we even came here!" Scout throw his hands around, throwing up the dramatics.

The nurse became flabbergasted. "Sir, I'm sorry, but this is a place to rehabilitate from drugs and alcohol. Not candy. That's something we cannot help with."

Scout looked at the woman, appalled. How could she refuse them like that? His beloved Sniper had a crippling addiction and needed help! And she was just going to turn them away? It was unacceptable. Slamming his hands on the desk, Scout started to argue with the woman. "This is outrageous! My best friend is in dire need of help and you're just gonna turn us away?"

"Sir, I'm gonna have to ask you to leave or I will call the cops." The nurse warns.

"Do it! I dare you. They're gonna be on my side anyways since you think it's okay to deny an addict for help!"

~~

Standing outside of the rehab facility, Sniper and Pyro stood and watched as Scout resisted getting into the police officer's car. Scout screamed and thrashed, going on about how his friend needs help and how he was being unlawfully arrested.

A different officer stood by Sniper and Pyro, he had been questioning the two about the stuff Scout was spouting and about the runner himself as well.

"Is... Is you friend always like this?" The officer asks Sniper.

"Nah, sir, this is rather uncharacteristic of him." Sniper mused, starting to realize that yeah, Scout had been acting strange recently. Sniper had never been one to question things but now here he was, outside of a rehab facility, watching his coworker getting arrested after trying to check him in for liking Swedish Fish. Sniper huffed and shook his head. Scout is Scout. He's just being the young goober he's always been.

Sniper walked up to the cop car Scout was residing it. He asked the officer if he could talk to Scout. The cop allowed it, rolling his window down so the two could speak. Scout was happy to see his Sniper. He wish that Sniper would rip the car door open, pick him up bridal style, and whisk him away from this crazy place.

"Snipes! Dude, you gotta help me get outta here! What they're doing isn't right. I was just trying to help you!" Scout cried, giving Sniper his best puppy eyes to convince the Aussie to help him.

"Mate, you beat three officers unconscious and tried to steal one's car. You're too far gone for me to help."

"But Snipes! Please! There's a reason I did all of this." Taking a deep breath to steady his nerves, Scout continued, " Sniper, there's something I wanna tell you. I lov-"

"Wait, you got something behind you ear." Reaching through the bars, Sniper reached behind Scout's ear, causing the runner's breath to get caught in his throat and a blush blossmed on his face. He looked up at Sniper, mesmerized by the Aussie's rugged features. Oh how Scout wanted to kiss this man.

Scout's thoughts got cut off when Sniper pulled his hand back, revealing a Swedish Fish held in between his fingers. That caused Scout to get mad. "Are you freaking kidding me? Get rid of that right now!"

"If you say so." Sniper said, popping the gummy in his mouth with a smile.

"No! Don't eat it!"

"Too late, mate."

Scout groaned, mad that Sniper was essentially able to get the last laugh in. Before he could continue, Sniper spoke again.

"You know, think I'm gonna go back to the base and have and have an Adam Sandler marathon with Pyro."

"You're STILL obsessed with Adam Sandler? God, when do you quit, Snipes?" Scout yelled, not wanting to rememeber those dark times.

Sniper started to walk away, "See ya when you get out of jail!"