#i just wrote right instead of write back there help lmao

[catastrxblues]

—

[starry-bi-sky]

I am absolutely loving your Danyal Al Ghul au. While I have a soft spot for the whole plotline of Danny becoming his canon personality almost right after breaking away from the LOA all because of Jazz, I'm just as much for your take in which he goes through the same character development as Damian.

Now I'm curious. You already tackled his relationship with Dani, will you eventually take a stab at when he, Sam, and Tucker meet Gregor? Given that it's one of my hated episodes as I couldn't stand Sam's infuriatingly hypocritical attitude to Danny's suspicions of him, I'd kill to see your spin on it.

Aw, thank you! Danyal Al Ghul aus are what got me into DPDC first, so I have a major soft spot for them. That being said, uh, its exactly that soft spot that causes me to have Many Opinions about the trope you just mentioned. Like the trope is all fine and dandy, i don't blindly hate it, my main issue with it is that most aus i've seen treat his backstory as an ex-assassin more like a pretty cosmetic accessory rather than something that actually should have had an impact on him. Especially if he remembers being in the league.

Like i cannot stress enough the fact that being in an ecofascist assassin cult (regardless of his standing in it) should've left him, in some way or another, screwed up morally and psychologically because that's just how development works. Nature vs. Nurture is like a game of tug-o-war that never ends, where they are constantly fighting against each other and one side usually has the upper hand or greater influence. Children model the behaviors of the adults around them (ex: bobo the clown doll experiment), and what impacts them in childhood can stick with them permanently.

Like how my psychology professor put it: a baby's brain is like wet cement; if you slap your hand on it, it leaves an imprint, and the cement dries that way. The same rings true for small children.

I could go on, but I frankly have so many thoughts on that alone that I would end up completely derailing from the second half of your ask, and I don't want to be more critical than I already have. Especially since you just mentioned you have a soft spot for the trope.

[Okay, hold onto your hats because this is long. Naturally lmao.]

Gregor! Man, I'll admit I last watched the show back in middle school on a dodgy illegal website (it had surprisingly good audio and visual graphics, and full episodes. But really annoying porn ads.) but I only made it to like season 1 before my hyperfixation faded and I lost interest. So I never actually saw the Gregor episode.

But... it is relatively easy to find free websites that stream Danny Phantom :), so finding the episode took me like. Thirty seconds. Plus the Tv.Tropes recap page because my damn earbuds just died and im out in public as of rn.

I'm not sure if I'll write something for the gregor episode like I did with Dani, since Dani's a bit of a special case in that she's a clone and tends to be a reoccurring presence in DPDC, and I thought the new dynamic with Danyal would be interesting.

Plus, I'm not a big amethyst ocean shipper for the pure reason of I'm just not all that interested in it; its kinda bland to me. I'll admit I've entertained the thought in this au due to the whole balcony scene i wrote, but I would've entertained the thought anyways if it was Tucker in that position instead. Big multishipper, me.

But, if I had to make it official? Danyal is not interested romantically in Sam when the Gregor episode happens, regardless of his relationship with Valerie. Who, speaking of I'm trying to think about how that would go, and I'm torn between including him almost-dating Valerie or not.

Because on one hand it helps point out Sam's hypocrisy (and i love her but i am always happy to point out her flaws and address them in au) in this episode in terms of Danny spying on them, but on the other hand I'll want to include a lot of set up in order to make Gray Ghost work in this au and wow will that take a while.

Especially with the Flirting with Disaster episode because it happens due to Technus' meddling, and Danny is, well, the son of the Batman? A trained assassin? An ex-assassin nonetheless, but still an assassin? A prodigy child in this au? He might not have needed to use most of his skills in the last few years, but like... there's just a bunch of 'what if' and 'well technically...' and 'would he? he could, but would he?' things that is getting in the way of my thought process and making my head spin.

.

Mmm. Okay. Flirting with Disaster occurs relatively the same as canon with a few exceptions; like Danyal noticing the strange coincidences, and he might take the idea into proper consideration because Sam has a point it is strange, especially out of nowhere.

However,,, he really enjoys Valerie's company, and he does really like her. He's been adjusting to civilian life for the last four years and while he's made a lot of progress, he's still. an ex-assassin child living like a wolf amongst sheep. This is normal, typical teenager stuff, and usually his friends like to encourage him doing normal teenager stuff.

So he's stubbornly holding out on the thought that this is normal, that ghost stuff isn't interfering here. He's a little hurt that his friends are discouraging this, he's not bothered by the fact that Valerie is a ghost hunter and he a ghost -- his mother is an assassin, and his father is Batman, and they still had a relationship. (Granted, he's not gonna tell them that)

If anything, being diametrically opposed to each other but still being in love is part of the family! Granted, usually both parties are aware of said opposition to each other, but he'll make a special exception this time around.

(And man now that i'm thinking about gray ghost, im now thinking about various like. scenes i could write between the two of them. maybe in a reblog.)

Anyways uhhh things relatively go the same as canon. Yeah. I think Sam still has a crush on Danny and still spies out of jealousy with Tucker.

.

Now, the Gregor episode! With that out of the way; the TVTropes recap for this episode isn't the best because it doesn't go into detail about the entire episode like it does with Flirting With Disaster and Shades of Gray.

(which i looked at earlier because I made a section of this post talking briefly about what changes I'd make to the Shades of Gray episode to help set up Gray Ghost, but ended up deleting because it was kinda irrelevant for the matter at hand.)

So I'm taking in bits of the episode clips at a time, I'll try not to get too nitpicky about how each scene goes because then it's gonna take me a longer time to write this.

But! First thing's first; since Danny is not romantically interested in Sam, he is also not jealous of Gregor. He is however, a bit eyebrow-raisey at him in their first introduction, but that's because Gregor is coming off as obnoxious.

Danny thinks he's kinda annoying, and it doesn't take a genius to see that Gregor is trying to impress Sam. But since they've only known him for five minutes he takes the good faith assumption and assumes that Gregor is genuinely trying to show interest in Sam's interests too because he likes her, so he keeps mum. The fake hungarian accent is weird, but it's overall harmless, so he doesn't point it out.

He does do the spying thing when he starts suspecting that Gregor might be working for the GIW. The episode only has this happen twice, but for the au this happens a handful of more times over the course of the week, with Danyal's suspicion steadily rising more and more each time.

Hah, when he brings up wanting to spy on Sam and Gregor because of this reason, Tucker still does his "woah! you wanna spy on Sam?" thing.

Danny immediately turns to him, completely unimpressed, and crosses his arms. "Tucker," he says, deadpan, "you and Sam spied on me and Valerie."

He uses a combination of his ghost powers and his regular stealth ability to spy on them. He's hiding in a tree when they're skipping rocks, close enough that he can use his powers to hear them talk but far enough away that he has a good view of their surroundings.

He's invisible in the cinema, but doesn't accidentally get in front of the projector. He checks the inside of the room for the GIW, and then waits outside the actual room itself, keeping an eye on the area and occasionally flying in to watch the movie out of boredom. It reminds him of being back on a recon mission with the League, but it doesn't end with him orchestrating someone's death.

Then when they're at the mall he stays in human form, blending in with the crowd. He runs into the GIW there, but realizes that they're not there because of Gregor; they're just shopping. They didn't show up at either of the last two locations, and he follows them to make sure they're not also trying to blend in. But they're literally just there for shopping.

Danny is rather pleased with this turnout; so far Gregor isn't a spy, he's just annoying. The next day at lunch he asks Sam how her date with Gregor went, and that's how she figures out he spied on them, because well, she didn't tell him that.

"Have you been spying on me?"

Danny messes with his food a little bit, and Tucker is sinking into his seat with embarrassment. He frowns, "Only last night. Those incompetent government dodos--"

His lip curls up; he gets all 'Shakespeare-y' (as Sam and Tucker put it) when he's insulting someone, "--kept appearing whenever Gregor did. I followed you and him last night to make sure he wasn't a spy."

A roundabout way of saying, "I was worried".

Sam is, as canon, furious. Danny understands why, he knows generally speaking that people don't like being spied on. But he's confused on just how angry she is, and is a little irritated by it.

"Why would you do that!" She exclaims, "That's way out of line, Danny."

"How? You spied on me when I was going on dates with Valerie." He narrows his eyes, and points his fork at her, "I'm not blind, I noticed."

"That's different, we told you why we were suspicious. And we don't have ghost powers like you do."

"I don't need ghost powers to sneak around, Sam, you've seen this firsthand. And I just told you why I followed you, I thought he was working with the guys in white--"

"So you think someone can only be interested in me if they're after you?" (this is a paraphrased quote, folks ;D)

"No! If that was the case I would have voiced my concern the moment I thought it. I don't get why you're so angry, you spied too."

Iiits.... a mess. Sam storms off with Gregor, Tucker tags along because okay, yeah, maybe Gregor isn't with the GIW, or maybe last night was a fluke. Either way he ends up tagging along. Danny overhears that conversation between the GIW and Mr. Lancer, and maybe he's right, maybe he's wrong; but something is up.

I've gotten to that scene in the locker room where Gregor tells Danny that he knows he doesn't like him, and I've paused at Danny's reply to say this: Danyal doesn't even bother trying to deny it.

"I know you do not like me."

"You're right; I don't."

"Ah, let me finish. I know you do not like me because you want to protect your friend, Sam, and I respect that."

"...That's correct."

"Good! Because I am going to ask her out."

"I had a feeling you'd say that," he stands up, claps his hand tight on Gregor's shoulder, and leans close to him with a threatening smile, "so you understand me when i say; if you break my best friend's heart, you're as good as dead, right?"

"Ah,, yes. I am so glad we got that cleared out of the way, and now I hope after we can.. how you Americans put it, hang out?"

In the episode he hugs Danny and gives him a la bise (which is that french greeting where you kiss someone on the cheek two or more times) after they end their conversation. But here, when he goes to do that to Danyal, Danny leans away, points an accusatory finger at him, and says; "Absolutely not; we are not close."

The next scene after that is like, end of day. Sam, Tucker, and Gregor walking away. Sam looks over her shoulder to glare at Danny, then gets forlorn. Tucker looks back and just looks forlorn.

(When did I start narrating each scene?? Eh, I'm writing this in brief spurts of time throughout the day. Don't fix what's not broke)

After that there's this whole scene with the two GIW agents that have been chasing Phantom all episode. They're there because they have Tucker's PDA that Skulker took, and it's got the information of their purple backed gorilla assignment on it. They've been going around seeing who Tucker associates with in hopes of catching Phantom.

Uhh ahaha and that is where this gets a little interesting imo, and also allows me to mention that im retconning Danyal's (already) redesigned ghost form. Which I've wanted to retcon even before this moment bc it was just too busy. I'll get to that in a moment.

The GIW suspect Gregor for being the Phantom because of his white hair and green eyes, which is all fine and dandy until you remember: Danyal (and by extension Phantom) has that very noticeable, rather identifiable facial scar that goes across the middle of his fucking face. The GIW could easily suspect that Phantom hides his scar with makeup if he's in disguise, but if they meet a kid with a seemingly identical facial scar and similar disposition? Hoo boy.

Solution? I've got two: Gregor is canonically a kid from Michigan who faked everything to impress Sam. Considering he knows she's gothic and knows that she's ultra-recyclo vegetarian? He probably watched her from afar or got information on her somehow. His hair is dyed, his eyes might just naturally be green, but if he notices that she's got a crush on either Danyal or Phantom? A little sfx makeup could help him recreate a similar looking scar.

My second solution that's gonna happen anyways bc its that suit redesign; Danyal does hide his face as Phantom. Ghosts are emotional creatures and its a popular headcanon that their interests, ambitions, etc, influence the way they look as a ghost, not just their death. A big reoccurring theme of my au is that Danyal did not leave the League unscathed, and that being an assassin is an important part of his identity.

So i'm discarding the hazmat suit look entirely and leaning into the 'assassin' thing. But the general (stylized) feel is like, white ribbon/cloth vambraces that he has used as a garrote at some point, a hood, a gaiter scarf-type thing. I'm keeping the cape. I did a doodle a few days back that's not the official redesign, but a redesign for Phantom. I may reblog this post with that attached because it's got the general feel down. There's very little white involved, but the inside of his cape flares out and looks like the night sky.

Now, the hood and gaiter scarf gets rid of most of the problem, but Danny's hood doesn't stay on all the time, so the GIW have likely seen the upper half of the scar. :] Gregor's own drawn-on scar doesn't have to be 1:1, but it looks close enough, right? A small scar cutting through the edge of his brow and ends right below the corner of his eye. A 'cool, badass' one opposed to Danny's 'garish' scar.

But! Back to the episode scene. Canon Danny gets written off as being 'too prepubescent' to be Phantom, and honestly it'd be hilarious if Danyal was written off for the same reason (he's calling them idiots in his head if they do). But instead -- leaning into the GIW's incompetence here -- he gets written off as being too mature or too talkative. Or something equally as absurd.

Sam breaks up with Gregor for canon reasons, but when Gregor does his "i really like you, but, come on-!" and gestures to tucker, he adds on "and that scary friend of yours too, seriously!"

Things go relatively the same as canon after that. Danny does end up apologizing for spying, however. Sam does it first. Sorrows, prayers, all that.

.

Things usually end up changed or different when I actually write it down, so I'd likely add more or adjust different scenes according to the flow of the oneshot. This is just like, a general vibe of how things would go, and where some of the more obvious changes would be if I did write this oneshot.

Hope you enjoyed! Thanks for the ask :]

[addicted-to-dc]

Jekyll/Hyde - Taskforce 141 x Reader

Okay, didn't like the first fic I wrote so here's this one instead lmao. Still figuring out team dynamics... but I can't wait to explore moreeee.

Tags for those who encouraged me to write this. Thank you!!! @greeniegreengreen @aeilani @poetslastdeath (Thanks for the writing prompt!! Imma go crazier with it soon)

Content Warnings: Typical CoD violence, ptsd, reader is going to be unhinged (even more so in the next chapters).

“She’s not a good fit.” You were waiting for the line; another iteration of the same denial you’ve encountered everywhere you go. “It’s all solo work, can she even work with a team?”

Your throat burns at the statement. Despite the stabbing pain with each demeaning sentence, you can’t help but continue eavesdropping. Your file has lies written on nearly every page, all the ‘solo missions’ redacted and sealed so tightly even you couldn’t read them.

“John.”

Laswell is too kind to you, too stubborn, somehow seeing right through your heavily defended psyche. Playing matchmaker with the 141 is a mistake. These men don’t need you. You’re disposable, belonging nowhere yet everywhere. They already have a psychotic on the team, the position has been filled since the damned taskforce was created.

“Ignore the files, look at her.” The fucking PowerPoint. It’s like you’re a mutt she’s trying to adopt off. As if a photo of you would convince them to accept. You’re a liability. It won’t be long until you’re sent off on another suicide mission, doomed to survive and repeat the process over again. Laswell sighs. “She’s never been assigned a solo mission.”

“Lone survivor?” Says a new voice. The Scottish accent tells you it’s one of the sergeants, Mr. Mohawk. “Sounds familiar, eh, Ghost?”

There’s no response, a barely discernable grunt takes the place of an answer. Then this ‘Ghost’ speaks: “Jekyll and Hyde?”

“She’s a completely different person on the field. Jekyll specializes in intelligence, sabotage, and infiltration. A screw loose, yes, but Hyde…” You don’t belong here. They know it. You know it. It seems like Laswell is the only one out of the loop, but you will never doubt her stubbornness. Your stomach drops. “Hyde is unstoppable. She flips that switch… you have a wildcard that will turn the tide.”

Maybe you should just leave. Maybe you should take up Graves’ offer. He’d gladly take you, but you’re not sure what’s holding you back from finally pulling the trigger… you should really work on your wording.

“She’s survived alone for so long; she needs a team that can survive WITH her.”

You eye the window, admiring the view of the forested area that claims most of the land. This building is commercial, an office building repurposed for government use… and it seems they forgot to lock the window. It slides open with ease, and the 2-story drop is nothing. You’ve fallen from deadlier heights.

“JEKYLL!” You don’t bother turning around, Laswell’s voice ushering you to make a break for it into the forest.

Turning around, you salute them, sarcastically of course, and bolt into the forest as the group rips their own window open. Serves them right for talking shit when you can clearly hear everything. Your eyes flick around, spotting a sturdy enough tree to climb up. The forest is old, old enough to be your perfect personal playground. It’s been a while since you’ve been in one. It screams “HOME!” in your brain, but you shove that thought down. That home is across the world, your claim etched into the tops of the trees.

It’s not difficult to climb into a spot, it’s nearly as easy as breathing. The ambience of the forest is enough to take away the pain in your chest, the wind grounding you with its bite. Sighing, you slump against the bark and look upwards. The clouds look extra poofy today. A great contrast against the bright blue sky.

You close your eyes. It’s as if you’re there, survival being the only goal in your mind. Nothing weighing you down…

“Jekyll!”

You look down, disappointed that they found you already. War never changes and peace never lasts, including your own. Captain John Price glowers at you from below. You’re starting to feel a bit better, especially since this perspective is too damn hilarious. What a little, angry dude.

Ignoring the man, you slowly move from branch to branch. Running won’t solve anything, they chased you for a reason. Laswell did this on purpose. The revelation makes you freeze. Scowling, you whip around to face the men. “Look, I don’t appreciate Laswell meddling with my shit either, but mention anything about my teams again and I’ll cut your fucking tongues out.”

“Fair.”

Your eyes flick to Ghost, the darkest thing in the forest. It’s almost as if darkness clings to him. You could easily disappear, this forest is vast, yes, but it would be a walk in the park to a nearby town compared to your previous unsavory experiences. You know this, but it seems Ghost knows too. He’s tense, watching you closely for any tells. It’s funny, you’re doing the same thing. Great minds think alike.

“How’d you like the PowerPoint?” you lean against a branch, scratching a scar on your chin. “Was it the maroon or grey themed one?”

Silence, but then an answer from one of the sergeants, Mr. Mohawk. “Grey.”

You frown, allowing yourself to swing to a lower branch. “Funny, she said she changed it. Liar.”

“Laswell a liar?”

“All of you are liars,” you immediately throw back, sizing up all the men. “To others… to yourselves.”

“And you’re not a liar?” The other sergeant asks. Curious man, a seeker of truth. His determination is difficult to ignore, a sense of justice that could rival yours. Good. There’s not many left in this world. He shall henceforth be Sunshine.

You smile, but it doesn’t reach your eyes. “Lies kill in our line of business, even the small ones, Sergeant. Not my weapon of choice. Now, are you rejecting me or not?”

“No.”

Now that’s interesting. You descend a few more branches. “Why?”

“The PowerPoint.”

You scoff, landing softly onto the forest floor. It takes only a few steps to close the distance. Hesitance invades your mind. This group will be different. You’ll just have to place your trust in Laswell and her mysterious ways. “Next mission?”

“Not much to go on, we’re waiting on Laswell for intel.”

Nodding, you glance at the team. “You going to bother introducing yourselves? Don’t bother, big boy, I already know who you are.”

Ghost looks like a challenge, very throwable. Maybe you’ll get a chance in the field. The Sergeants exchange glances. Aren’t they cute.

“Too late, you’re Mr. Mohawk and Sunshine now,” you state, adjusting your vest and walking away. “Give me 24 hours, Price.”

And with that, you leave the men alone to focus on your favorite task… digging for intel.

“Jekyll.”

You halt in your steps, turning around. “Yes, Captain?”

He steps forward. “You’re 141, we work as a team. You haven’t lost us yet.”

The pain returns, the ringing in your ears reaching a crescendo despite the forest’s calming aura. Blood, so much blood, gasps for breath and- Your jaw tightens, any more pressure and you’re sure you’ll shatter them. “Conference room 2.”

-------------------

Thanks for reading! I really want to you (the reader lol) to pitch in and decide where to go! I think a little choose your own adventure would be cool. I'll start it up within the next chapter or two. I'm so exciteddd to write again. I hope my writing muscles aren't too decayed XD

If anyone has suggestions, do not hesitate to comment! I need more unhinged mutuals on here pls

[bumblebeesfromvenus]

Hi! Can you please write part 3 of bale batman x assistant reader as his wife? And how he handles jealousy after their marriage? Thank you 😊

Hello!!

I actually wrote something about this a little while ago, but because I feel like just linking the post is a bit of an asshole move, I'll add some of my thoughts!

I hope that's okay <3

Here's my previous post :)

~Fi 🐝

(My inspiration for Bruce has been dwindling, I desperately need to watch the movies again)

Part 1 ♡ Part 2 ♡

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ────── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

He will always, ALWAYS call you his wife. More than your actual name. He has to keep reminding people that you're unavailable and that you're his and his alone. Bruce perks up immediately whenever your name is mentioned. He's policing all of his employees at this point lmao

maybe someone talks about you to a coworker about how innovative you're thinking for the company is, that you're kind and exactly what this industry needs and Bruce just pops up out of nowhere like "who are you talking about? Hm? Oh, my beautiful, amazing, perfect wife? I couldn't agree more."

He gets so stealthy after being in the batman business that he scares them half to death because he's just there all of a sudden. After hearing some of the complaints the employees make (you're not at work as often anymore after Bruce insisted you focus on some hobbies instead) you're seriously contemplating putting a little bell on him just so you don't have to worry about anyone getting a heart attack.

He always has to be touching you in some kind of way. His go to is a hand on the small of your back or on your thigh when you're sitting down, he loves holding your hand, too. His thumb will brush over the cool metal of your wedding band and it puts his mind at ease.

Every single employee knows not to flirt with you, even as a joke. Not after Jake suddenly disappeared after Bruce caught him sweet talking you... (he may have a received a strongly worded letter from his landlord ((Bruce)) and, what do you know, for some reason, any other living opportunity in Gotham is unavailable right now)

He brings you flowers at least once a week (or until the ones he gifted you before can't hold their own anymore and wilt). They're always fragrant and bright in color, whatever is in season right now. And they stand nicely on your desk in a beautiful crystal vase that catches the light perfectly. He catches himself looking at them more than he he would like to admit.

Or, more specifically, he wants to see if he can catch you admiring them. He's gotten a new appreciation for these small things since you came into his life. They way you cup the delicate blossom and inhale its sweet scent is a picture he will dream of forever.

Bruce makes sure that you're only addressed as Mrs. Wayne (unless it's someone close like Luscius or a very nice coworker of yours) making it clear to everyone, again, that you're his. He gifts you a necklace with his name on it, which you wear proudly, and Bruce can't help but grin when he sees his name glint in the sunlight against your skin.

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ────── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

I'm so sorry for kinda half-assing my Bruce posts lately, but I can barely write anymore 😭

I usually write at night but I'm tired then too so I'm like "Oh, I'll just write during the day." BUT GUESS WHAT I'M ALSO TIRED DURING THE DAY

Fucking iron deficiency istg

I basically sleep all the time and when I do write, it's not a lot bc I'm literally falling sleep halfway through so yeah

[prongslvl]

EVERYONE ADORES YOU (AT LEAST I DO) - remus lupin

PAIRING remus lupin x gn!reader

SUMMARY your change of attitude concerned remus, way more than he thought it would.

a/n: jus a lil something for @loving-and-dreaming ! i related to their blog a bit too much lmao so i wrote something quick and short. also an excuse to finally write something for remus!!

The first thing Remus noticed were your eyes. how it looked all dulled up and looked down most of the time, as if it was searching for something to lay its gaze upon without offending anyone. Your fingers fiddled with the hem of your uniform or the wooden wand you owned before going back to your lap, where it rested.

He wasn't used to your silence as well; he expected your usual cheery tone despite having to wake up at the crack of dawn (as much as he hated anything too energetic in the morning, your presence never seemed to bother him—Godric, it might've even helped Remus live through the dreadful hours.) but you remained still, cooped up in one corner by yourself when everyone's together in groups, as if someone casted an 'immobulus' on you. If it weren't for your occasional head turn and answering whenever a teacher calls for you, he would've brought out his wand in a heartbeat.

Remus doesn't think both of you are friends; at least he thinks so. You were friendly with everyone, even with the foul Snivellus, who always rudely pushed you away (he swore if he saw you getting pushed by him again, he'd make him eat slugs for the whole school year), but not even Snivellus can put you down; you've proven this many times.

But today, even the greasy mole rat seemed concerned with the lack of 'annoyance', as Severus verbally described it, from you. The only relationship he could probably describe between you two was that of acquaintance. He doesn't feel intimidated or pressured to ask you for something, and neither did you towards him. This caused a few more encounters between the two of you, with Remus seeing much more of what your sweet heart could offer.

There were times you'd unconsciously help him through his werewolf problem. Your face was the first thing he usually saw after getting treated by Madame Pomfrey in the hospital wing. It wasn't hard to think of a lie because of how quickly you believed him.

("You don't have to explain anything to me, lovely. What matters is that you're hurt—well, not so much with the help of Madame Pomfrey." You gave him a kind smile, such an expression that made him, for the first time, feel guilty for lying. In his head, if he ever told you about his problem or even caught him in the act, you wouldn't see him any differently.

And your nicknames—such loving nicknames he wasn't used to—Remus would be lying if he said he didn't feel uncomfortable at first, but he didn't blame you in the slightest. It was only a matter of time before he became desensitized to the names you'd given, unconsciously looking forward to them whenever you used his last name, Lupin, instead. It only happened once, though, and Remus made it clear to you that he became fond of them.

He held a piece of paper with a familiar name written on it. Hogwarts' current potion Professor usually assigns students during on-hand activities, and today, you were partnered with him. Remus greets you, "Hello, fancy seeing you here," making you chuckle, "nice to see you too, Lupin." It caught him off guard a bit, his mind immediately racking for any sort of mistake he must've made to be called just 'Lupin'. 

"No nicknames today?" His mouth moved on its own as he poured ingredients right after them. It was your turn to get caught off guard, freezing in your spot as you stared at him. He suddenly felt the need to explain himself after your silence. "Did I do something wrong? I was starting to get used to 'lovely," he said. On the back of his head, a voice begged for Remus to put his head inside the boiling cauldron to show how shameless he was.

You smiled at him and said, "It slips sometimes. Plus, I just wanted to try and say it because I'd never learned your name until I read my paper. My apologies, lovely.")

You were one of the rare people inside Hogwarts that Remus could tolerate without having to get to know you deeply, unlike Sirius or James, who had to do more than just approach him to finally have a decent conversation with him. You were naturally approachable, as were probably many others, hence the quick relationship you both created.

But today, you haven't even spared him a glance. It was weird, even for Remus, who's probably the perfect definition of the word, to see someone like yourself suddenly change overnight. It was obvious it wasn't just him that noticed; Sirius had to ask him if he knew anything about it, and it slightly pained him to say no. Remus wanted to know why and comfort you in any way he was capable of doing so. His eyes followed your every move (which wasn't really hard with how little you moved around than you normally do) but saw nothing that gave even the smallest clue as to what happened to you.

He tried to approach you himself; it wasn't the first time he'd done it, so seeing the way you purposely avoided him by walking towards the staircase to your dormitory hurt him. He wouldn't be able to follow after you even if he wanted, watching as you whispered the password to your common room. Even the painting that guarded the tower noticed your change of tone.

"That's it. I'm going to look for them," Remus declared to his friends, glaring towards the blank parchment paper that was supposed to contain the homework he needed to pass tomorrow. He placed his things under his bed, grabbing his coat before departing from his dorm.

He could hear several footsteps behind him, yelling his name. "Moony! Wait up! Where are you going?! Remus!" James managed to grab a hold of his shoulder; his strength was enough to make him pause on his steps. Remus gritted his teeth, his jaw tightening with how frustrated he felt. The bespectacled boy could only sigh, reading his friend like a book.

"You don't have to look for (Y/n), Moony." The mere mention of your name reminded him of what you looked like in the morning during class, making him even more eager to leave. "They're probably just having problems, you know, like any other person?"

"That's the thing, prongs. I want to help them. It's unusual, the way they're acting. I can't just stand by when I know for sure something or someone's bothering (Y/n)." The boys can see how much you meant to Remus; he didn't even notice how desperate he sounded and felt. "I won't do anything that'll get us hurt."

"Ah, yes, just like the many times you told us." It was Sirius who replied, a knowing smirk on his face. "The last time you told us that, we had to carry you to the hospital wing."

"Please, just—I have to find them. You can always look for me on the map."

The frustration etched on their friend's face was enough for them to pity him. James glanced at Sirius, who only shrugged.

Remus felt the other's hand leave his shoulder. "Promise us you'll fix it and not get hurt." James smiled at the boy, giving him the folded marauders' map. You won't be able to find them without it; you'll be looking forever," Sirius added before leaving to go back to their room. The two laughed at their friend, shaking their heads. He clenched the map in his hands, going unnoticed by James, who simply patted Remus' back.

"Say hi to (Y/n) for us," he said as he followed the long-haired boy, leaving him in the common room.

Remus wasted no time leaving, opening the map. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good," he mumbled under his breath, tapping the paper. It revealed a bunch of unfamiliar and familiar names to Remus, but his attention was solely on looking for your name, scanning every nook and cranny of the school. You weren't inside your dorm or the astronomy tower, where most students go to hang out at night. He checked any of the professors' offices and the classrooms, but to no avail. It was like you were a ghost, but not even ghosts inside Hogwarts were spared from their map.

It was only then that he began his search outside the school premises when he finally found you. Remus saw your name and footsteps by the whopping willow, overlapped and still. He guessed you were sitting or standing near it. Seeing you outside at night, by the sacred tree of all places, was the last thing he thought you'd be. Remus didn't think twice about following you, not caring about the thought of Filch catching him.

Once Remus saw your robe flying with the harsh winds the tree kept producing, he slowly walked from behind you as your eyes remained high up on the branches.

"(Y/n)?" His voice startled you, turning your head to face him. Remus could tell you probably thought you were some prefect or filch, seeing the way your hands trembled. The hill you were both on was dark, barely illuminating each other's faces, but it was enough for the boy to see how confused you are.

"Lupin, what are you doing here?"

Remus decided to ignore the hurt he felt in his chest, knowing you were his top priority right now. "I wanted to know what was wrong," he confessed, walking further towards where you stood. Remus could see the way you avoided eye contact once again, looking down on your dirtied shoes with an expression he couldn't see or decipher. He took your silence as an excuse to continue.

"I know we barely know each other; if it weren't for your cheery personality, we'd only know each other as Lupin and (l/n), but we aren't. You easily slid into my life way before I realized it, and the fact that I managed to find you tonight proves that—"

He was cut off by your quiet sniffing. His eyes trailed the same hands that tended to his wounds that Madame Pomfrey had treated in the past as they rubbed the tears on your face. Remus had little to no experience comforting himself, let alone other people. but the instinct to pull you close with his arms took over him. You gasped at his actions, but you accepted his attempt at a hug, burying your face in his chest.

It took a bit of time before you finally calmed down, sitting on the ground next to Remus, who was just as dazed as you were. The whomping willow continues to make small tornadoes, with the occasional leaves and branches hitting your bodies. Remus' eyes trailed from the sky to you, watching as the robe you wore protected you from the winter of the night. He didn't expect you to talk, but you did.

"I'm sorry for being weird today." Your voice has gone hoarse as a result of your loud sobbing. It was Remus turn to listen quietly, his eyes expectantly staring at you as he waited for you to continue.

"I had a bit of a wake-up call yesterday. I've been told the way I acted was too much; it got too overbearing to handle. The last thing I wanted to be was a burden to everyone."

"But you're not," Remus responds with absolute urgency. "Whatever wake-up call it was, they're wrong."

Your glossy eyes remained on the boy, who reassuringly stared back, a small smile on his face. "If I'm being honest, your presence lessened some of my burdens—the awful mornings, my time in the hospital wing—just everything you're involved in, it gets better." He didn't know what came over him to suddenly hold your hand, giving it a squeeze to relieve your mind of whatever negative things this 'wake-up call' had given you.

"You're wonderful, (Y/n). I promise you."

 

[bellewintersroe]

Daniel Ricciardo x HornerDaughter! Reader

part 13 - dramaaaaa y/n gets upset when reading some of the weird comments after a little group holiday goes viral and secrets are starting to be exposed. Little bit of a time jump here, I wanted to get to the nitty gritty parts. Also I realised I accidentally wrote the last chapter in first person instead of third? (Or second I can’t remember wtf each one is) oops!!!! Here’s the LINK to part 12.

warnings: mentions of sex, inappropriate touching (consensual ofc) nothing too graphic, hate?? comments& crying. Mentions of readers and Daniel’s age gap, but again the ages are up to you, I’m going no lower than 22/23 because I feel kinda weird about any younger.

“How are you so tanned, Daniel?!” The almost-as-tanned girl sat down on the Australian’s bare lap. Hence the almost, being from England and from a ginger father, she was always naturally pale and tended to use spray tans to make up for the translucency of her skin.

“It’s called being Australian, baby.” Daniel cheekily grinned, holding her bum cheek and giving it a quick squeeze as soon as she sat. “Yeah, but…” y/n scooted forwards, playing with the strands of his hair. The Ibiza sea had somehow made his hair even curlier, even hers had a beachy wave to it that Daniel thought made her look like a mermaid (as he told her 5 times over). He thought she looked beautiful- he didn’t think she could get anymore beautiful until he saw her bikini cladded, in her natural form, cannon-balling off the side of the yacht they’d boarded for the night.

“You’re like so nice and dark, can’t you give some to me?” His eyes, fell to her chest, the baby pink pushing up the swell of her breasts. He just wanted to nuzzle his face deep inside of- “Daniel…” she warned.

“Right, sorry… yeah, I would if I could.” With his eyes back on her freckled face, she offered him a smile, nudging to leave his lap. Daniel’s hands tightened with a soft, “no.”

“What? You wanna have sex… again?” Her brow perked, Daniel felt hot under her gaze, and he couldn’t deny the semi that was growing in his swimming trunks.

“No- yeah.” He couldn’t even lie. They’d been at it like rabbits, and especially on this yacht, on the deck when nobody was watching, all over the bedroom, in the water (comment if you acc want me to write a smut based off this lmao). She was sore from the amount of action she’d had the past two days, but she wasn’t complaining, y/n just thought she needed to give certain areas of her body a rest.

“Daniel.” She groaned, head dropping on his shoulder. “Can’t help my girlfriends fucking sexy as fuck.” His lips pressed to the inside of her shoulder, at first she was about to shudder from the action, but the specific use of girlfriend threw her into a frenzy of excitement. “Oh, I’m your girlfriend now?” She tried to play it cool, but both of them could hear the giddiness oozing off her voice. “Uh huh… if you wanna be?” Daniel nodded up, a closed mouth smile growing on his face. “Yeah.” A giggle escaped her lips.

“Yeah? I already thought you were, you… sausage.” He teased, bouncing her slightly on his knee. “Mmmmh, whatever.” They shared a loving kiss, one that wasn’t helping Danny’s situation in his pants. “I’m gonna go shower.”

“Ok, babe. I’ll get in after you, I’m just gonna go back on deck with the lads for a bit…” The good thing about the pair of them was that they could spend as much time together as possible without getting sick of one another, Daniel felt like she was apart of himself that he’d been missing his whole life- not to sound cheesy. But spending their own time together was so important, and space for y/n felt vital, especially when she wanted to have silent time, scrolling through her tik tok. At least, she thought she wanted some time to herself. Things were going well until a specific video of an overwhelmingly recognisable yacht came up on a video. Her stomach immediately dropped, pictures of her and Daniel, engaging in nothing to explicit, but a few kisses, touches, hugging. Clearly somewhat intimate moments that they kept concealed to the public eye. She swiped furiously, concerned as to what else had been captured. Daniel untying her bikini top, the two of them making out…

Y/n felt her breathing intensify and skin prick with beads of sweat. The comments were what she feared the most- the exploitive pictures were guaranteed to bring unasked controversy.

A mixed response was guaranteed, of course people were shocked, some ecstatic, others doubtful of their age gap. It wasn’t that which bothered her, it was the intruding questions and statements of complete lies and assumptions that rattled her. It didn’t take long for tears to form when people began comparing her to Daniel’s ex’s. Questioning ‘what age’ the relationship started, pointing out insecurities on her body, commenting on their visible intimacy.

Y/n was shaking when Daniel returned into their bedroom. She froze, phone still in hand, automatically turning off her phone as though she intended to hide this from him. “Still in your towel?” He attempted to tease, reaching out to nudge it off her head. The lack of response had him confused, stepping forwards with a slight hesitation.

Daniel questioned if she was crying, before shaking it off, but when she sniffled he was falling to his knees in front of her. “Hey…” he crouched in front of the saddened girl. He reached out, both hands resting on her lap comfortably, feeling a punch in the chest when he caught sight of her tear stained face. “Somebody’s leaked pictures.” She blurted out, voice heavy with upset. Daniel felt his breath hitch.

Without saying another word she handed over her phone, allowing Daniel to see for himself. “Nothing like- really bad, but… I don’t know.” She watched his reaction through the corner of her eyes, using her towel to wipe at her damp eyes.

“Oh, y/n/n.” Daniel sighed. “Fuck. I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.” She let out a sad laugh. “It’s just- it’s so invasive and the comments-” her voice became choked up once again.

“Ah, babe, you know not to read them. Fuck all that, it’s not even important.” He slung an arm around her, pulling her instinctively into his chest. “Like the most people are fine- but I-i don’t care it’s just the awful ones, Daniel. How have- why has somebody followed us on a fucking boat?” Her torment was something that angered Daniel. Not towards her, but to whoever the fuck stalked them, whoever decided to be a creep and take these pictures of her- not to forget the people who sent spiteful messages.

“People just like to ruin it for their own gain. I’m sorry, baby.” Again, Daniel sighed, feeling a little lost for words as y/n cried quietly in his arms. “Don’t-dont cry, y/n/n. C’mere.” She shuffled further onto his lap, wiping at her eyes in a subtle manner. “Like now my dad has to see that, everybody’s just gonna see and-” her voice cut short to avoid becoming too distressed. Daniel felt the tension that began to grow in his muscles.

“I don’t know.” She managed to exhale after. Daniel pressed a lingering kiss to her head, and squeezed her again. There was a moment of silence which fell between the pair. Daniels mind now began lingering.

“What did they say?” He knew he shouldn’t, but he couldn’t help it.

“Just stupid shit.” He was already reaching back for her phone, glimpsing through a few of the weirder comments. “Oh, I can’t even read that shit.”

“Don’t read it then.” She muttered, biting down on her thumb. “Honestly fuck them.” Daniel inhaled, lifting up her cheek. One kiss was pressed to the rounder part of her cheek. A small, angelic kind of smile managed to peak through her sadness, even just for a second or so.

“I love you. So much, nothing in those comments will change that, will it?”

“No.” She agreed, swiping the last of her tears. “I’ll sort it out. Don’t worry.” He then nodded, a slight sense of reassurance filling her. “Are you sure?”

“Positive, baby. I’m not gonna let that slide, not when it’s upset you like this…”

————————————————————————

taglist: @dinodumbass @mccall-muffin @allabouthappiness @benbarneslut @ricciardhoe-3 @headinthecloudssblog @f1wintermoon13 @hrlzy @topguncultleader @victoriaholland @thatsouthernblondewiththeass @j-cat @lovzmez @laneyspaulding19 thankyou guys so much for commenting and following along I appreciate it, I love reading all your comments!!

[pixeechix21]

It's been so long

Summary: Keegan is ur brother’s best friend; returned from deployment. u’ve broken up with ur ex and u haven’t been able to come in so long, late at night forbidden feelings arise and it can’t be helped that u act upon ur longed desires.

TW: smut, sex, very minor vulgarity, praise (kinda), forbidden, teasing, creampi

note: i'm sorry about the writing the original sucked I wrote another, then tumblr wasn't working so now I got this. I gave up lmao

Plz leave comments about what u want more of, opinions n wt ever are welcomed 🥰🙈🥳

It’d been weeks- months, since someone made u come, it's been itching at u for so long that even trying to use ur fingers or don't work. Frustrated, u huff out and go to the kitchen searching for any pie left over. It looks like he has already beat you to it. Eating a full plate of pie and whipped cream, u clear ur throat. “Didn’t expect company, u want some?” Keegan offers. u come up to the island n hop on the counter. “Yes please,” u thought he’d get u a new plate but instead he ladles a fork and moves it in ur direction, “Open ur mouth then, I don’t have cooties,” he joked. you open your mouth obediently and pull away. He stares at your lips as you do this and he can’t help but imagine it being his dick. The blood rushes to his cock at the mere idea, he tries to make it less obvious in his gray sweats. A small amount of whipped cream remains on the side of ur mouth, his hand absentmindedly goes to wipe it away. Looking into his eyes u take his finger into your mouth and suck it clean, u can hear him as he inhales eyes widening before they darken. “We really shouldn’t, '' he whispers.

 “Please, it's been so long,” u beg, running your hands up his body. His eyes follow a path down from ur eyes to ur lips. He bites him down trying to keep himself from doing something he’d never be able to get back from. “I want to y/n, but he’d never forgive us,” he whimpered as u kiss him lightly massaging the back of his neck. “Forget about him. I need u right now,” u lick up his neck to his mouth. He wants you too, so bad that his hardon is aching. He can’t let you go unsatisfied. He groans, giving dives into our mouth. ur panting and whimpering as his hands feel across your body then resting on ur waist. He whispers, “fuck,” as u grind into him. He becomes possessed, hurling u up so that ur legs wrap around himHis cock pushes up into u as u grind“Fuck fuck-u- y/n u need to god just like-” he moans. u pick up your pace, ur climax finally building up. “Wait, please,” he sets you down on the couch. 

Biting down ur lips as u see his large bulge. “Clothes off,” he says as he takes off his own clothes. u hurriedly take it off, not wasting any time he’s on top of u. Biting u, gripping u trying to pull u closer to him. He twists and sucks ur hard nipples as he finger fucks u. u squeeze ur eyes shut, letting him. “u feel so good around my fingers. Look at u wanting to come to just from me finger fucking ur needy little pussy,” u arch ur back. “u want my big fat cock in u? Huh, yeah,” u stifle a moan as he removes his fingers and places himself at ur entrance. Stroking the tip up and down ur wet slit. It’d been so long since he’d fucked someone, he’s losing his mind as he watches him slowly enter u. “u’re cunt’s so fucking tight,” he bites out dropping his head as he pauses to breathe once he’s all the way in. 

u clench around him, “stop if u continue tonight isn’t gonna last long,” he groans. u feel his abs tense as he tries not to bust early. “Stop it’s killing me,” he grabs ur throat n digs into ur hips to stop ur movements. He’s a different person, he’s fucking u so hard now. you're clenching around as u come at the sheer force of him. His incoherent speech is muffled in ur ear as he bruises ur neck and hips from where he’s holding on. “This dick is all urs, fucking come on it,” he circles ur clit viciously overstimulating clit throbbing blindingly as u shake under him. Teary u moan out his name as he fills u. ur juices cover his shaft as he pulls out. “No more. Keegan,” u whine. It’d been a long time, too long, and u didn’t want this to stop just yet. “Look at u, you're shaking, did Joshua really not know how to treat a lady?” Keegan mocks kneading ur breast. “you're not half the man that he is,” you admit, sitting up u push him down to lie down. “Say that again,” he hums, devouring every inch of ur body as he watches u crawl on top of him. “He hasn’t made me come half as many times as u. Now shut up and kiss me,” he bites your lips and tongues u, taking away any air u had. u start to bounce on his dick, “my dick is urs y/n,” he sighs out. u ride him faster, stretching around his cock. Just as u go harder his body bucks, “oh fuck u know how to fuck me- so needy- all this dick in u-,” he sputters finally coming so strong that his eyes roll to the back of his head and he fucks u meeting each of ur movements. u feel him fill u up and u can’t help but smile at how perfectly he fits in u. “Such a dirty little slut," he says, juices and his come glistening between your thighs.

[sublimecatgalaxy]

would you write something for johanna (thg) x fem!reader where the others (like peeta, katniss, finnick etc.) always see the tough sarcastic sides to her, but then they see her around her gf (reader) whos really soft and gentle like opposites of her and they see that shes johannas soft spot? sorry for the terrible english!

Bestie I love this, let's imagine together that district 13 is fine and not run by a crazy bitch alright? LMAO I love writing non-canon for the hunger games people cuz they can all be together and happy :)

When Johanna and the others were rescued from the capital and we were all reunited, people noticed a difference in her compared to how she was before. She was still herself, witty, with dark humor, beautiful even without her long, silky hair. But there was a new side to her that most people, other than Finnick, never saw.

That's the side that she showed when she's with me.

We met nearly a month after her first games. She was on her victory tour and I was a painter in District two and she would say that I caught her eye from the crowd, so much that she had to find me and ask for my name and an address that she could write to me.

No one would really imagine her as a romantic but damn the girl was good and she swept me off my feet in only a few months. She wrote to me, sure, her last letter coming in right before the quarter quell. When we found out that she would be reaped again and brought back into the place that brought her so much torment- neither of us could comprehend it.

I thought I was never going to see her again.

That was until she had a friend of hers, a peace keeper in my district, sneak me out of my district and into thte capital where I could see her and I did. We spent the night together and that's when she told me about the plan to get Katniss and the others out of the arena. She also informed me of the greatest secret that they were all keeping- Discrict 13 was alive and well and ready to accommodate the pressure and stress of a full revolution.

When I found out that she was taken by the capital, my whole world fell apart. It was probably the only thing that Katniss and I were able to bond over, the fact that our lovers were in the clutches of President Snow and being used as propoganda. It was horrible.

So when it was agreed upon that they would be rescued, I jumped at the opportunity to go with Gale and help them in the process of getting them out of the capital, no matter what it took.

When we finally reunited in the jet, it was like the whole world stopped. As if every piece of me that was missing was finally back in it's right spot, like a missing puzzle piece she was finally back in my arms.

"It's kind of cute that they could do this." Johanna whispers in my ear, watching Finnick and Annie dance around in circles in the middle of a huge, loving crowd. I turn to her with a fond smile and nod, leaning into her the slightest bit as Katniss approaches us with a sarcastic smile on her lips, as always.

"You two look couple-y." She chuckles and I smile, clutching onto Johanna's hand that rests on my thigh and I feel her tense up as if she's taking it personally.

"That's what happens when you're a couple, genius." She snaps with a sarcastic tone and I huff, giving her a gentle bump with my shoulder and she mutters a quiet 'sorry' under her breath.

"I'm just saying, after everything we've been through, it's nice to see you actually act like a nice person." There's a pause for a moment, as if the two of them are finally understanding each other and instead of passive aggression, Johanna responds differently, taking even me off guard.

"Yeah well she brings it out in me like Peeta does with you." My heart warms for a moment as she sends me a small smile, her cheeks blushed in a deep red and her chin dips downward to conceal it.

"That's really sweet actually." Katniss sits beside me with a huff, motioning to the crowds of people in front of us that are cheerfully dancing and singing around the happy couple. "You guys don't dance?"

"I do, she doesn't." I jut my thumb in Johanna's direction but she just laughs and turns to me with an unconvinced look.

"You could convince me but you haven't asked."

"Please dance with me." I nearly immediately beg, standing up out of my chair so I can grab her hands and tug her towards the dancefloor, wanting nothing more than for people to see her happy and loved, especially Finnich given how much he worries for Johanna.

"Yes, ma'am." She sighs and turns to throw a wink at Katniss who just laughs and claps her hands at us.

"Wow, you're whipped."

"Pipe down, Everdeen."

[skania]

OnK Chapter 149

I know it doesn’t mean much coming from me because I’m always complaining about Aka’s writing, but…

And I mean it when I say that I expect nothing 😭 This was literally my first ever OnK-related reblog and its tags are more relevant than ever lmao

These, too:

#honestly I didn’t think too hard about any of this during my first read #because the romantic endgame seems so obvious that it kind of discourages guessing lmao #but re-reading these chapters has made me appreciate Aqua’s side of his bond with Akane a lot more

Back when I first got into OnK, I mentioned that Akane was the entire reason I kept reading the manga. I didn’t care about the romantic subplot, found Aqua/Kana extremely obvious and predictable, and Aqua plain boring.

It’s only during my second read that I paid close attention to Akane’s interactions with Aqua and I ended up playing myself into both, caring about Aqua and shipping him with Akane lol

This chapter has made me realize that despite everything, I'm not emotionally invested in whether they end up together or not. I’d prefer it, obviously, because Aqua truly is at his most interesting whenever he’s around Akane, and their dynamic has the best development in the manga (so far).

But it’s just like I said before: If they don’t end up together, that’s just Aka’s loss, not mine. I’m just here for Akane 😂

And as an Akane fan, I feel like the best thing for me to do right now is to just take a step back and watch things unfold, because Aka will do whatever he wants regardless of how any of us interpret his manga lol

So instead of posting the long post I originally wrote about this chapter when the leaks came out, I'll just share a a clown gif because in hindsight it was silly of me to expect Kana out of all people to have any sort of meaningful insight into Aqua 🤡

And a couple of things that caught my eye because I can't help myself:

Kana didn't even see Aqua and Akane have any sort of meaningful moment, just those two standing in each other's vicinity was enough to make her throw herself a pity party. How many more times is she going to pity herself and give up? How has Aka not tired of writing her this way? Where did her development from the Scandal arc go? 🤡

So Chapter 147 featured Kamiki thinking Ai doesn't love him and Kana thinking Aqua likes her. It even had a helpful "Cut 139: Misunderstanding" panel and everything. Will this mean something? Who knows!

Kana used guilt-trip! It was super effective!

Oh the irony! Poor Akane looks like she's been hard at work convincing herself that she's over Aqua. And you know what? I cheer for her and respect her energy 100%. I'd rather see her doing her mightiest to help him without any ulterior motives than to have her crying for him and hoping to get back with him every other chapter lol

Akane calling Kana out for her pity-party and for being cowardly was so cathartic that if I didn't already stan her, I'd have become a fan right now 😭 It also means that Aka is 100% aware of the way he writes Kana, so when will she finally be allowed to grow?

Kana's praise to Akane made me so sad though because yes, Akane is pretty and she's talented and she's kind. That's sweet of her to say. But that's not what made Akane someone special to Aqua: it was the way she understood him. The worst part is that Kana ends her praise by saying that Akane is a "goody-two-shoes" but... that's the opposite of how Akane views herself. She sees herself as someone who's not decent and not normal. So it's no wonder that while she gets flustered (it's her dear kana-chan praising her), she seems to get a bit sad/frustrated afterward. After all, for Akane it's probably the opposite. Men would prefer a decent, normal, bright girl like Kana - Aqua included.

I wish someone would tell Akane that she is too ignorant of her own charms and that she doesn't have to act like an adult all the time. Truly the pot calling the kettle black! Sadly, unlike Kana, Akane seems to have no one in her corner in this manga. Aqua was the only one there and the poor guy is barely even a character anymore lol

Overprotective mother or controlling ex-girlfriend? Take your pick!

The English translation left something pretty important out in these panels. Akane doesn't just say "if you have a girlfriend", she says "if you have a precious/important girlfriend". This distinction is very important because it goes to show that... as expected, Akane doesn't think she was an important girlfriend to Aqua. It's like she didn't count and Kana would be the real deal. Oh, Akane...

Which takes me to her very silly, very convoluted yet very predictable plan (in true Aka fashion).

When Akane thinks “I know exactly what you hate”, I imagine she means that Aqua hates hurting and endangering those he cares for. So I'm guessing Akane thinks that if she plays matchmaker and quite literally throws Kana at him, someone he has a soft spot, then Aqua won't be able to go through with his revenge because that would mean breaking Kana's very fragile heart.

In other words, it looks like Akane is going to try and use Aqua's guilt-complex against him and her weapon of choice is love. But not her love, obviously, because as far as she's concerned, her romantic love already failed to save him.

Granted, using Kana's romantic feelings to her advantage is kind of... well, wrong. To quote Akane herself, [Kana] is neither her pet nor her property, but a person. But I'm guessing that Akane may be falling victim to the same loophole she got caught in in Chapters 96 - 98. She thinks she knows what's best, so she's putting her own beliefs aside for the time being.

Kind of like Aqua, actually.

And, ironically, it's Aqua himself who first realized how easy Kana is to use.

So! All in all, I'm here for Mastermind!Akane but I hope that Aka will actually make it worth our while. Will Kana realize that she's about to be used as a chess piece in this Proxy War? Who knows, characters in this manga seem to walk in circles, only being allowed to grow when it fits the plot 😂

Last week we wondered whether Aka would subvert expectations or go the predictable route, and down the predictable route he went. His way of making it less predictable is by including a twist in the form of Akane's ulterior motives, but will this be enough to allow this ol' used trope to lead us someplace new? I guess we'll have to keep reading to find out, but given the quality of the writing lately, I'm not expecting much lol

[messrmoonyy]

friends with benefits with Tess but reader has some feelings for her and Tess rejects her a lot and tells her she just wants to have sex with her. But she’s trying to keep her safe because she’s scared that because she does bad things she might make reader be in danger. But Tess sometimes thinks that she wants to be with reader because she has feelings. But one time Tess finally sees that she has feelings for the reader too and they get together

If that’s okay it’s okay if you don’t want to write that

Apartment 342

Tess Servopoulos x reader

A/N- this is not even remotely as smutty as the request may make you think I’m js. Angst, smut( if you squint ), fluff, hurt comfort. All in one. I wrote the majority of this basically in one sitting right up until 2am last night. And I kinda love it. I’m also a little obsessed with Tess’ pov rn I don’t know if you noticed lmao. So this is a Tess pov. And again this literally just doesn’t have smut in. Like maybe 3 sentences. If that. I wanted tess’ emotions instead.

Warnings- smut ( oral ) if you squint, small mentions of violence and injury, honestly a pretty toxic relationship

Word count- 7.9 k

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Tess ran a soothing hand over your leg as you stopped squirming, going slack with a blissful sigh. She unhooked your leg from over her shoulder and sat up, wiping her mouth on the back of her hand with a satisfied smirk on her face. 

You always looked prettiest like that. Every muscle in your body turned to jelly, a blissed out look on your face. It made her chest twinge in a way she pretended not to notice. 

“ you okay? “ she asked, getting up from the bed and walking over to the window, pushing it open to let some cool air into the now stifling apartment. And hoping the breeze might clear the fog in her mind. 

“ I’m okay “ you said, making Tess glance back to see you shuffling to sit up “ you know someone might see you standing there fuckin naked in front of my window “ 

“ lucky them “ you scoffed, but smiled. 

“ yeah. Lucky them “ she took another moment to feel the cold air before turning away from the window. The last thing she did need was someone seeing her there, as much as she had joked about it . It was why she always made a quick escape, she came for what she needed. Then she left. And that was that. It always had been. 

That was the agreement. No strings attached. No emotions. No feelings. 

“ you know you don’t have to leave straight away? “ you said as she started picking up her clothes, pulling her tshirt over her head “ you make me feel like one of those whores in the back streets of area 3 “ 

“ why? I don’t pay you “ you rolled your eyes at her bad attempt at a joke and she sighed, buttoning her jeans. 

She had started to notice in the last few months your willingness to let her go when you were done was…. Lessening. You tried to make her talk, or even just talk at her. Prolong her visit. She wasn’t much of a talker, especially when it came to her emotions. Her feelings. And she got the idea that was exactly what you wanted to talk about. 

Maybe she was stupid for letting you seduce her all those months ago, letting herself be drawn in and not cutting it off after the first time. It was nearing a year of her slipping through the zone to your apartment, using you as her personal form of stress relief. 

And maybe she was stupid for thinking you would be able to follow the rules that she had set. That she would be able to follow them herself. Usually her self control was impeccable. But clearly not with you. 

“ maybe you should pay me “ you said with what sounded like you were trying to joke back, but it didn’t quite carry. She walked over to you, tucking her fingers under your chin so you’d look up at her. 

“ maybe I should. You always help me out don’t you sweetheart? “ she said with a smile, brushing her thumb across your jaw. She could see one of the conversations she liked to avoid with you brewing, the kind where you tried to make her stay. Tried to make her talk. The kind that almost always ended up in an argument. She could tell just looking at you, your eyes softening in that way they so often did when you looked at her. Gazing up like she was the most incredible thing you’d ever seen. 

Eyes swimming with affection. Affection that she couldn’t accept. 

Your hand came up to touch her cheek and felt like fire. Like your fingertips were molten and scolding her skin. And that look in your eyes… 

" Tess.. "

" don't " she stopped you before you could be even remotely caring towards her. It was always the same. She always ran. She was always scared of letting you in, letting you break the last barricades she had up against you. The second you cracked her she was done for. The second she let you in this entire thing was ruined. She kept you at arms length because she had to, because she was too old for you. She was too dangerous. 

She couldn’t. 

She wondered if you knew her own control was slipping. If you knew she only pushed you away because she had to and that was why you’d taken to trying to make her talk more. Could you see the chink in her armour? Could you see that weak spot hiding and were trying to push at it?

She figured you did. 

" are you okay? " she turned her head, your hand dropping from her cheek. Her skin still burnt. She could still feel you there. She always could. Your fingerprints were practically burned into her skin, a trail of everywhere you had touched her. Marking her in a way only she could see and feel. 

How could she be okay when she felt like you were all over her? on her skin and in her mind. 

" I'm fine " she lied. 

" that's always your fuckin answer " you muttered, annoyance filtering into your words.

" because im always fine " she sighed, annoyance in her own voice as she pulled her jacket on ready to flee the situation. Fearing that one day you’d bring up that conversation and she’d crack. And she couldn’t. She couldn’t. 

" no one is always fine Tess. You act like you’re so fucking strong all the time… but you can’t pretend with me. I see you " she gave a short laugh and grabbed her bag. Checking her gun was loaded and shoving it into her back pocket, it was past curfew after all. You sat up, holding the sheets to your chest as your eyes followed her as she collected up your clothes from the floor. 

" well, I am " she dropped them next to you and you grabbed her arm before she could leave. She avoided your eyes at first, her jaw tightening. She didn’t want to deal with this conversation tonight. Or any night for that matter. She needed to get out of that damn apartment. 

" Tess " she closed her eyes for a moment before meeting yours. They always looked so sad, like so much was going on behind those beautiful eyes. You wished she'd talk to you, she knew that. She knew you were silently begging for her to stay. To tell you what you wanted to hear. Wished she'd sit down and just spill every single trouble she had, confide in you. Trust you. But she couldn’t trust anyone. Not with emotions like that. 

Deep down she wanted to. Wanted to stay and tell you that it would probably end up with both of you dead, but something was prickling in her chest every time she looked at you. Every time she was around you. But she knew it would only end in disaster. 

" I'm fine sweetheart. Alright? Look I got shit to do oka- " 

" I dont believe you "

" I'm not asking you to " she pulled slightly at your grip but you didn't let her go. And maybe that in itself was a little win for you, because she very easily could shake herself from your grip if she wanted to. You weren’t even holding her tightly and she was far stronger than you anyway. But she didn't. She stood there with your fingers wrapped around her wrist, letting you have that. Part of her wishing she could give in. 

" you can talk to me. You don't have to leave 30 seconds after you fuck me you know. I don't know why you're so scared of me " she scoffed again at that “ or does only Joel get to hear your secrets huh? “ she shook her head and did let herself free from your grasp then, running a hand over face with a sigh. 

That was another thing about you. You’d started suspecting you were just her side thing, that she was fucking Joel and then going around to you for seconds. Which was stupid. Both of you knew that, you were just getting desperate clearly. 

Little did you know she hadn’t been with a single other person since she’d met you. Least of all Joel. 

" scared of you. Please " she shook her head with a slightly bitter laugh, shaking off those thoughts “ sweetheart I hate to break it you but you’re least scary person in this entire fuckin QZ alright" she placed her hands on her hips in a way that demanded authority, that served as a reminded of who was in charge. Who was the boss. A reminder that she had the power there and you didn’t, and that wasn’t about to change “ that's not our arrangement. We don't... talk you know that. You said you were okay with that. It works. Don't rock the fuckin boat. Be a good girl, do as you’re told " her tone was almost condescending, mocking. Further reminding you to get back in line. She was being mean. She always was. But it worked and kept you in place where she needed you to be. 

" right. Okay whatever " you pulled your clothes back on and stood up yourself as she headed for your door. But she stopped before she could reach for the handle, turning back around again. 

She was curious about what had brought on tonight’s particular round of questions. They were getting more frequent. 

" why are you doing this? " you raised an eyebrow clearly urging her to elaborate " this... trying to- we agreed no strings. This only works if we stay that way. If you listen " it was your turn to scoff and you folded your arms. 

" I think you ruined that yourself when you turned up here with a bag of illegal shit last month Tess. You’re the one that pulled me into the shit you apparently wanted to keep me away from. So don’t give me that bullshit that this only works if you do this stupid fleeing act every time you come over here because you wanna fuck and forget " 

She’d turned up with a bloody nose and her hood up, pushing into your apartment before you could even invite her in. She hadn’t known where else to go. She was tangled in a mess of some wannabe crime boss and had bitten off slightly more than she could chew. She’d thought going to you would be safe. There was nothing to link her to you, no reason why she’d go to you. 

But 2 nights later you'd been jumped on your way home from a work assignment. You’d have died if she and Joel hadn’t turned up, Tess getting some strange feeling that something was going down, deciding to go check on you only to find you blacked out with two thugs searching your pockets. 

She had kind of been forced to be a little more open with you after that. Though she still wasn’t exactly an open book because if you knew everything?  she’d scare you away she knew it. If you knew the stuff she did, the gritty details of how she and Joel had made their way up the ladder of command in Boston.  They didn’t get where they were by trading friendship bracelets. 

She had told you she'd regretted going to you the moment she'd arrived, that she shouldn't have put you in that position. That danger. Yet also convinced no one would ever suspect she would go to you. Yet someone had clearly followed her. And then you. In honestly she’d never been so scared for your safety like that. Or anyone’s for that matter. And that concerned her. Because she wasn’t supposed to care. 

Yet she clearly was. 

She’d stayed in your apartment for 2 days after the attack. Sitting like a guard dog at your door in case someone tried to break in. She didn’t think she’d actually slept at all in those two days. She’d tended to your wounds, watched out the window like a hawk, brought you food. 

That wasn’t the actions of someone that didn’t care. In fact it was quite the opposite 

" you know why I had to do that. The whole reason I came to you was because we had no strings. There was nothing to connect us " it stung a little. She could tell, something flickering across your face. But you were both used to it. Hurting each other " I didn't know someone would follow me. I didn't think- look I'm not getting into this tonight. I came here because I was stressed, you're meant to help me relax and right now you're just giving me a fuckin headache sweetheart " 

" right because that's all I'm good for for you isn't it? Stress relief? I’m not a fucking toy you know! God you're a fucking dick sometimes Tess, pushing people around for your own fuckin amusement right? " now it was her time to be stung. Just a little. 

She didn’t want you thinking that. But she needed you to. She’d rather you hate her and be safe than feel for her and be battered to a pulp by some nobody in a back alley. 

And she knew even if you did hate her you’d never lock her out. She had you by the throat and both of you knew it. You were putty in her hand and she knew how to press and mould you to exactly how she wanted. And you let her. 

" why do you care? " you laughed at that like it was the stupidest thing she had ever said. 

" because I do " 

" that's not an answer " 

" yeah well neither is 'I'm fine' when you clearly aren't so I guess we're both even huh?  " you'd got her there, her jaw clenching again. Maybe you both got off on the arguing like that. Maybe you liked pushing her buttons as much as she enjoyed pushing yours " do you care? Huh? Does that fuckin cold heart in there even know what caring is? " 

" do you think I'd be here if I didn't? " she snapped and she'd got you. For once she truly had rendered you speechless with that it seemed. It was pathetic really. The absolute bottom of the barrel bare minimum and yet it made your eyes widen, soften. 

" you don't act like it " all your anger had gone from your words. You sounded weak now. She didn’t like the way it made her chest ache. It made her angry. Annoyed. Annoyed that you kept making her feel. 

" I saved your life and I protect you every single day. And this is my thanks? Damn sweetheart, who’s the one with cold heart now hey? " she said and walked over to you in a way that would have been intimidating if you didn't know her, if you didn't know she'd never lay an agressive finger on you. A way that would make anyone else back up. But you held your ground. Maybe it was still a little intimidating though, the way she saw your breath catch. But you liked that and she knew you did " you think only one person tried to get you? Just that one I saved your ass from in the street? These kind of guys don't just stop at one person " she gave it a moment. Let it sink in. 

Let you know that she had been taking care of you without you even knowing it. Telling you she felt something without really having to say it. 

She tucked her fingers under your chin and for a moment she almost wanted to kiss you. Seeing you looking up at her like that. So vulnerable and innocent. So far from what she was. But she didn’t. She never kissed you. Never on the lips anyway. That was too… intimate. Kissing meant feelings. 

She couldn’t feel things. She couldn’t have you feeling things. 

" I- " 

" I have a lot of people that don’t like me. That want what me and Joel have " her voice was low, almost threatening. She needed you to listen, to shake you out of the mood you were in " you think you wouldn't be the first person they'd go for if they knew about you? They go for who they think will hurt the most. They find a weak spot and they break it "

" I didn't know " you whispered 

" of course you didn't. That's the whole fuckin point. I stop things before you even know they exist. People. You know what they'd do to you if they ever got their hands on you? Is that what you want me to tell you? “

“ Tess- “

“ will that make you fuckin listen to me? Hmm? If I tell you about how they'd hurt you? Kidnap you? You think they’d go easy on you? You’re young. You’re beautiful. Do you need me to tell you how much fun they’d have breaking you? " her voice remained steady. Low. Intimidating. Of course she’d never let anyone do those things, she’d protect you with her life. But if telling you about was what it took to make you stop feeling things. Then she’d do it. 

" Tess stop- "

" these aren't nice people. I don't deal with nice fuckin people. You really want to involve yourself in that? In my life? Put yourself at risk like that? " 

" you're scaring me stop " you whispered, the message seemingly sinking in. 

" good, it should fuckin scare you. So stop asking questions, be a good girl and do as you’re told. Okay? " she held your gaze for a moment before her eyes flickered away, her other hand slipped down around your waist and over your ass, giving a light squeeze. Solidifying the reason she was there, remind you the reason she had turned up at your door. Maybe more to herself than to you at that point" thank you for tonight " then she let you go and headed back for the door again, the moment over " I'll see you tomorrow sweetheart " 

To your surprise you followed her out into the hall and she wondered if you were trying to lure her back in again. You always did love arguing with her. 

" no. You know don't bother. Seeing as I'm so stressing for you, right? And I’m your weak spot right? Go see if you can find someone else to put up with you like I do " you said in a harsh whisper, not exactly keen on airing your dirty laundry in the hallway for your neighbours to hear apparently. She turned back to you as she headed for the stairs at the end of the hall, and couldn’t help the smirk that found its way onto her face. 

You were cute when you were trying to be angry. Telling her to fuck off like you so often did when she made you mad or told you some home truths. 

" you're funny " she simply said, knowing it would only wind you up further and made her way down the stairs, leaving you to stew on your anger with her for the night. 

She knew you didn’t really mean it. She knew you couldn’t stay angry at her. That no matter what she said to you you would be waiting for her the second she knocked on your door again. And maybe that was wrong. Or toxic. 

But it was also keeping you safe. 

It was raining as she slipped out of your apartment building. It was barely past 7 and already pitch black outside, the winter rain icy against her skin. But she almost didn’t mind the dark. It meant she could hide better as she slipped through the back alleys, avoiding patrols with ease. She knew every rotation in her area like the back of her hand, and the other areas for that matter. So she made it back to her apartment undetected. Wet and cold. But undetected. 

Tess walked into the dark of her apartment with a deflated sigh. Closing the door and tossing the keys onto the kitchen counter before flicking on the lamp, only to startle as she found Joel sitting at the kitchen table. 

“ what the fuck Joel! “ 

“ well good evenin to you too “ she held a hand over her chest, feeling her heart hammering away as she took a deep breath to try slow it down. 

“ I’m too tired for you to be sitting around in the dark you fuckin dick “ Joel simply shrugged and she felt his eyes on her as she rummaged around in the kitchen to find a glass, hoping a glass of water would steady her again “ why are you sitting in the dark? In fact why the fuck are you even here? Go home “

“ I had a headache. And I you know that is not a nice thing to say to a guest in your home “

“ guests are invited. They don’t let themselves in and sit in the fuckin dark and damn near give me a heart attack Joel “ she shed her wet jacket and sat down opposite him, noticing a welt on his cheek that hadn’t been there that morning “ the fuck happened to you? “

“ some fucker working for Farris happened to me “ Tess sighed and ran a hand over her face, a headache threatening to pool behind her own temples “ where the fuck were you? “ her fingers itched to go grab the bottle of whiskey she knew was in the cupboard above the sink. It would certainly make this conversation easier. But she resisted, knowing it would only make the headache worse tomorrow morning. 

“ I was busy “

“ busy fuckin your little thing on the other side of 4? “ she clenched her jaw at the unsavoury tone he had. She knew what he thought of you. She knew that he just thought you were a distraction. But she also knew he wouldn’t prod too deeply into the harsher thoughts he had, because she had plenty of her own verbal ammo to retaliate with. At least her recreational activities weren’t damaging. Unlike Joel and his Oxy. 

“ it doesn’t matter where I was. What matters is Farris is getting too big for his fuckin boots. And we need to be careful. We worked hard to get where we are Joel. I won’t throw away the last 8 years of work because some nobody wants to take over our smuggling lines. Alright? “ Joel raised his hand in some show of surrender, leaning back in the chair that creaked under his weight. 

“ so what are we doin about him. Cause if what those fuckers that jumped me tonight said is true, your little doll over the way might be in for one hell of a weekend “ that peaked her interest. Her eyes flying up to meet Joel’s “ now I got your attention huh “ 

“ don’t fuck around with me Joel. What do you know “ he shrugged and pinched the bridge of his nose for a moment. 

“ Farris knows we’re the ones that killed the guys that went after her. Some test I guess. Seeing if she really was the way to push your buttons. I guess we proved it to him “ 

“ fuck “ she cursed under her breath, leaning her elbows onto the table and raking her fingers into her hair “ fuck “ she could feel Joel’s eyes on her, burning into her. She was becoming far too slack when it came to you. She was beginning to let her emotions cloud her judgement. And she couldn’t do that. 

For one it was completely pointless to have the emotions in the first place. She was the one that had told you there would be no emotions. No strings. No nothing. Sex. And only sex. Two lonely people getting their required quota of human contact and that was all. 

But she knew you had abandoned that. She knew that you weren’t strong enough to control your emotions and it was rubbing off on her. But she had to be stronger. She needed to be. She couldn’t be with you. 

For one she was too old. Even the fucking wasn’t exactly the best of plans, she was holding all your attention when you could go out and find someone your own age. Someone a little less fucked up. But she was selfish. And she liked you. And she liked the way you looked at her. And maybe it was cruel to say, but she liked how you always came back. No matter what she said or how much she pushed you away. You always came running back to her again, which is what she always wanted. 

She had noticed herself getting a little less… distant. She didn’t really want to push you away even though she knew she should. She wanted you around. She wanted to keep seeing you. 

But it looked like that was starting to become impossible. 

You didn’t deserve the life she was leading. She did things too dangerous for someone as sheltered as you. 

“ well I’ll be damned “ Joel said after a few moments, shaking his head in what seemed to be amusement 

“ is something funny? “ he seemed to debate saying what he was thinking. And she knew he wanted to say it. To say she’d caught feelings. Say she was stupid keeping it going this long. 

“ you gotta cut that off Tess “ he said in the end, clearly avoiding what he really wanted to say to her “ You’re getting too tangled up in whatever the fuck it is you having going on with her. This isn’t you “ 

“ I know “ she whispered, resting her head in her hands for a moment “ I know “ 

She liked to joke and call you naive, but maybe she was the naive one. To think she could go along with someone like you this long and not get attached. 

“ this shit with Farris is serious “

“ yeah Joel I fuckin know “ she snapped, sighing again and sitting back in the chair. She gathered her thoughts, pushed you to the back of her mind. And focused on the business at hand “ so here’s what we’re gonna do “

" fuck that's it. Good girl like that " there you were again. On your knees for her as if you hadn't told her to stay away only a week ago. Her fingers were tugging at your hair, guiding your head at a pace she wanted. Once again letting her use you as a way to relieve her stress. Letting her take what she needed and have the control. And you were a sucker for her so you did it every time. 

So much you not wanting to see her again. So much for her telling Joel it was over.

In fact that was what she had turned up at your place to talk about. To tell you she couldn’t do it anymore, ready to make up some excuses that she’d found someone else. That she was bored. Any excuse that would hurt you enough to stay away from her for real this time. Ready to lie through her teeth and pretend you meant nothing to her in an attempt to keep you safe. 

But you had all but jumped her the second she’d stepped into your apartment, clearly having a stressful day yourself and in the mood to please. 

And having your head between her thighs one last time wasn’t something to complain about she supposed. Especially when you were touching her like that. 

“ that’s my girl, fuck just like that “ she’d miss that. Miss the way you felt smiling against her, how your fingers felt inside of her, the noises you made. 

She’d miss you completely. Not even just the sex. Your eyes. Your smile. Your fearlessness when it came to arguing with her, shouting back without a care. 

But it was for your own good. And maybe her own too. 

She didn’t last much longer, coming on your fingers with a choked moan and tugging probably painfully at your hair before going slack. 

" that's really not why I came to see you you know " she said with a small laugh, pulling her jeans back on and pushing her hair from her damp forehead as the blissful feeling left her as quickly as it had arrived. 

" could've fooled me " you cracked a smile as you said it and rose to your feet. 

She’d really miss you smiling at her like that. Miss the way your eyes practically sparkled anytime you looked at her, clearly such strong admiration and affection that she almost expected to see cartoon hearts floating around your head. 

" I'm serious " you sat beside her and she noticed the way you pressed yourself into her side. And she couldn’t help the way her arm fell across your shoulders, holding you there. Allowing herself that small thing before she pushed you out of her life completely " I just wanted to check on you. Especially after your pissy fuckin mood the other day " 

" thank you " she shrugged and you were both quiet for a few minutes " are you in danger? Am I? " you asked quietly, looking up at her with those big sad eyes. She refused to hold your gaze. 

" what? " 

" what you're doing? Is it dangerous? The people who made you worried so you came to check on me, are they dangerous? " You kind of knew the answer already she was sure of it. She was a smuggler. It wasn’t exactly the safest job in the world right now. You knew she was dangerous and she dealt with dangerous people. She did dangerous things. But you clearly wanted to hear her say it to you. Maybe so you could justify the constant worrying you always did for her. The worrying she always told you not to do. 

But it was okay. You wouldn’t worry for her after today. 

" I’m handling it "

" and if you can’t " 

" i can " 

" but if you can’t " you pressed 

" why are you so Interested? " she asked with a slight sigh, silently hoping she could’ve gotten a few more minutes of peace with you before the argument began “ you think I cant handle myself? “

" I worry about you " as much as you said it it still made her heart ache each time. Not many people cared about her. In fact she was certain it was just you and Joel. It was almost alien now " I always worry. I’ve seen you kill people like it was nothing and I wasn’t afraid, I was concerned you’d hurt yourself. You deal with FEDRA officers Tess. Any one of them could decide one day they’re bored and turn you in. I don’t wanna wake up one day and see your name on the roster for the public fucking hangings " you rambled it all out in practically one breath. 

She didn't respond straight away. Simply kept watching you as the words continued to tumble from your mouth before you bothered to stop them. Not sure what she was supposed to say. She wished she could be like you. So willing to express yourself and so open with your emotions. 

But this situation with Farris was big. And she couldn’t risk it. She had to stay on track. 

" you shouldn't worry so much " you almost seemed like you wanted to laugh. She broke your eye contact, staring at the black screen of the long broken tv instead " I can take care of myself "

" I know you can... it doesn't mean I won't worry. And before you say anything I don't want to hear that stupid no strings conversation again " You turned her face to look at you, hand on her cheek. So tender with her. So gentle. No one touched her tenderly anymore. No one showed her care. 

" Tess... " your voice was a whisper, trailing off as words seemed to fail you at the closeness of her face to yours. Her nose brushed against yours and she so desperately wanted to kiss you. She debated it for a moment, wondering if it would be so bad. She was still going to leave you. She was still going to break your heart, so what did it matter anyway? 

But she feared that as soon as she did so nothing she could say would push you back. You would never let her go after you got the affection you had begged her for for so long. She couldn’t take the risk. 

" don't " her voice stopped you before your lips could touch, low and almost warning, as her hand wrapped around your wrist. 

" please " it sounded weak. Pathetic almost. It made her chest tighten. You were so desperate for love. For love from her. And she couldn’t give it to you. 

" we can't. Not now. We can't " not now was probably a poor choice. It would insight hope. A half promise that the present wasn’t going to work. But maybe the future would. 

" why? " she pulled away from you and got to her feet. Running away. Again. She had to. She had to get out of there before she broke completely. 

" don't do this again for the love of god don’t give me this fuckin conversation again " 

" why can't you just answer me? Honestly. Just tell me why you won't even kiss me for fuck sakes. Why won't you open up to me? Why do you keep pretending you care about me only to kick me to the curb again? " 

" do you think I'd be here if I didn't fucking care? " her voice was rising and you knew you'd just fallen into the same routine of trying to talk and ending up in a fight. But maybe that was okay. That would help. Would make ripping the bandaid a little easier 

" then stop pushing me away! The no strings thing? It’s bullshit! It’s. Bullshit. You think I could be like this with you for this long and not feel something? And I know you feel something too you’re just too fucking stubborn. And I’m tired of pretending I’m not in l- "

" don't. Don't you say it " she turned to you, finger pointing at you in warning. Brow furrowed as it always was " don't. Say it. You say it and I'm gone. I'm gone and I won’t come back " she couldn’t hear you say that word. She knew you were in love. Of course she did. But you’d never said it. And that would be too much for her. That would hurt beyond relief. 

It would hurt you even more. 

You held her gaze for a moment. Debating it. But you looked so tired. You were done clearly. Done listening to her. Done being pushed around. 

" I love you " you said with a shrug, tears pooling at your eyes as you breathed it out despite her warnings, like it couldn't be contained any longer. It wasn't fair " maybe that makes me an idiot. But I do. And I won't pretend I don't anymore " tears fell down your cheeks then and she fought to keep her composure. To remain stony faced and cold. 

Rip the bandaid Tess. 

" you can't. You don't understand. Loving me is... I can't. You can't " she felt more flustered than angry, as if she'd received some detrimental information that was world ending. Her hand raking through her hair. She wanted to walk over, hold your face and wipe your tears. Tell you that yes you were so unbelievably stupid for loving her but she loved you too. She couldn’t “ i have to go “ 

" of course you do " you didn't follow her as she grabbed her jacket and headed for your front door 

" You won't see me again. I'll make sure Joel keeps an eye on you. I’ll make sure you’re safe but. This is it. You won't see me again like this. Whatever this is… it’s done " she hesitated for a moment looking back at your sagged, crying form. It was pity she felt the most. She pitied you. You who had just told her you were in love with her. That you cared.  

She wished she could tell you the truth. Tell you how she felt. But she couldn’t. 

Rip it. 

“ that’s. That’s the whole reason I came here anyway. Me and you it’s- look it’s done okay. I don’t wanna do this with your anymore alright? You don’t listen. All these emotions… we said no strings. And you didn’t listen. We’re done here “ 

" well good. I don't want to see you again anyway, don't ever come back here. Go find someone else to fuck! I don't want to hear from you again "

She didn't respond. Simply clenched her jaw and gave a short nod of her head. 

It had been ripped. 

It was done. 

You despised her. 

She left your building in a hurry, like the air inside was too confining and her chest felt too tight. Outside she took a breath, leaning back against the brick and closing her eyes for a moment. 

“ fuck “ she didn’t know how she felt. Angry. Upset. Both “ fuck! “ she dropped her head into her hands for a moment, trying to steady her breathing before raking her hands through her hair and trying to compose herself. 

She had important things to do. She had to find Farris and make this entire thing worth it. She braced her hands on her knees, taking a moment. And then she stood up and she left. She had to find him. 

Tess didn't exactly recall how she'd ended up in front of your building. Brief flickers in her mind of her and Joel finally tracking down the bastard that had been threatening you, the almost blackout anger that was clouding the memories. Blood. And guns. And knives. the hammering rain against her skin. But she couldn't recall the entire journey properly, or the events of the warehouse in area 4. Just that she was now there. Rain dripping into her eyes, entire body aching now that her adrenaline had worn off. Some muttered excuse to Joel to take their stolen goods back home and that she needed to make sure you were okay. 

She was convinced she’d taken a knife to the shoulder at some point, a dull ache growing stronger by the second. 

But Farris was dead. And that was all that mattered. He was dead. He wouldn’t bother her anymore. Or you. You were safe. 

She knew they were dead. That was a certain thing. They had made him suffer. Did the things she tried so desperately to keep away from you. But it was worth it. But other things she couldn’t quite recall, couldn’t quite separate the real from the make believe. 

She just knew she had to see you. After all she’d done. But you still hated her. She knew that. 

So she didn’t know why she was there. Or why she found her feet carrying her up to your apartment door. Staring at the metal 342 that had faded and tarnished over the the years. 

You wouldn’t see her she was certain. You’d slam the door in her face and tell her to get fucked. 

But she knocked anyway. 

She wanted to explain. Explain how she had had to push you away. Be cruel. Because she felt so unbelievably undeserving of love, especially from someone as incredible as you. Because she felt you deserved better. Someone younger. Someone who didn’t do illegal shit every single day. Someone who could keep you safe. 

But also… she just needed to be around you. To be in your company. To talk to someone other than Joel. He wouldn’t understand. But you would. 

She knocked again. Before she could change her mind and turn around. There was some shuffling around inside your apartment, the sound of the key in the lock. 

You opened the door only a crack, the security chain in front of your face. She almost smiled just at that. You'd listened to her and her worries for your safety. Your eyes fell on her and she waited for you to slam it back in her face, or tell her to fuck off and leave you alone. But you said nothing. You didn't even look that shocked to see her. 

" I didn't know where else to go " her voice sounded far weaker than she'd been expecting, and as though she'd had to force the words out of her throat. She waited for the door slam. Or that bitter laugh you gave her whenever she'd pissed you off or said something stupid that had upset you. 

But instead you closed the door softly, the sound of the security chain dropping and then re opened the door. You looked her up and down before reaching out your hand and gently leading her inside. 

She must have looked a sight. Soaked from the rain and sporting a black eye. And a possible stab wound. But you didn’t comment on it. 

She stood a little awkwardly as you re locked the door. Not knowing what to say at all 

“ shit you’re bleeding “ you said softly, coming up behind her and placing a hand to her aching shoulder “ sit down. You’re making a damn puddle “ 

She sat at the table and shed her button up, your hand gentle as you pushed her tank strap out of the way and examined the wound 

“ knife “ she said before you asked her, hissing through her teeth as you pressed at the tender skin. 

“ stay here “ she watched you go into the bathroom, the sound of cupboards opening and closing for a few moments. She almost wanted to cry. Or scream. It wasn’t natural how nice of a person you were. How no matter how much she pushed you around you still helped her. 

She didn’t deserve your help. Or your care. And yet you were giving it to her so freely. 

“ I’m sorry “ she said when you resurfaced, hands full of stuff to clean her up. 

“ yeah. I know “ you said quietly, dabbing at her wound a little harsher than probably necessary. But she deserved that 

“ I can explain “ 

“ you don’t have to “

“ I need to “

“ I know. You do. You have a lot of shit to explain to me. But… not now Tess. I don’t know where you’ve been or what you’ve done. But you’re in no state to talk tonight. It’s okay. I can wait “ there was no malice in your words, no anger. She was taken aback by it. 

She didn’t deserve you. She didn’t. 

“ I don’t deserve you “ you gave a small laugh behind her and she glanced up at you as you picked up a needle and thread from the table. 

“ you’re right. You don’t. But I’ve been known to have exceptionally bad taste in women “ she closed her eyes as you stitched her up in silence. And for once she felt like a weight was shifting off her shoulders. 

She felt safe there. Protected. Cared for. Like all her emotions of the day, the last few months in fact, came rushing forward. 

“ I didn’t mean what I said “ you sighed again behind her but didn’t berate her for trying to talk again “ I had to it- I did it because- fuck “ her brain refused to string a sentence together, still cloudy and frazzled from days of hunting Farris down. From the fight that had ended it all. From the lack of sleep. 

Maybe she was hallucinating the entire thing. But the dull pain of the needle threading through her skin reminded her she couldn’t be. 

“ you’re not yourself “ you said softly tying off the the thread and placing a gentle hand to her shoulder as you rounded her “ look at me “ 

You held her face in your hands, holding her head up so she had no choice but to look at you. She could almost see the cogs whirring away inside your head, trying to read her expression. But Tess was a notoriously hard nut to crack. Able to read a room in a second but impossible to read herself “ look. Tess. I’m serious. You don’t need to explain tonight. You can take your time. It’s okay. You don’t have to pretend to be something in here. It’s just me “ 

She closed her eyes and let out a deflated sigh. Maybe she shouldn’t have visited you tonight. Maybe she should’ve gathered her thoughts and tried in the morning when her brain would actually allow her to string together a coherent sentence. 

“ I’m sorry “ 

“ I know you are “ her own hands came up to cover yours, looking at your eyes that were swimming with sympathy. Pity. From anyone else she would’ve hated it. But from you it made her chest tighten. 

“ I don’t deserve you “ she repeated in a whisper “ I don’t. All that I’ve done to you all that I’ve said- “

“ shh. Not tonight. You can do your explaining. And your grovelling. In the morning. And before you protest you’re staying here tonight. Send you out like this fuckin FEDRA will capture your ass before you even reach the end of the street “ 

She did want to protest, she’d never stayed overnight. But she didn’t have the energy. Or the heart. 

“ I’ll go find you some clothes yeah? “ you let her go and turned to walk away but she stood up and grabbed at your arm. You tilted your head to the side, a flash of confusion on your face “ everything okay? “ 

“ I will explain. Tomorrow I mean. I’ll explain everything. And I’ll grovel. I’ll do whatever the fuck you want me to until you believe that I’m sorry “ she took a step to close the distance between you both, cupping your face in her hands “ I was scared “ 

“ you’re not scared of anything are you? “ you said quietly with a smile on your face. There was a lot she was scared of. And most of those things boiled down to you. She was terrified of anyone hurting you. Terrified of losing you. Terrified of the way that you made her feel. 

But she couldn’t find the words to tell you that. Not tonight. 

So she showed you instead. 

She leaned in slowly, giving you every chance to push her back and tell her not to. She wouldn’t blame you for it. But you didn’t. She kissed you in a way that could only be described as tender. Barely even touching her lips to yours at first, still waiting for you to shove your hands against her chest and tell her to get out. 

But you didn’t. You stepped closer, you warm hands sliding over her bare arms and up to twist your fingers into the hair at the nape of her neck. So she placed a hand to your back, pulling you in as close as she could, pressing your warm body to her cold and damp one. It made you shiver and she wondered if it was from her rain soaked shirt touching you or because of the kiss. 

She hoped for the latter. 

She kissed you in a way she had never kissed anyone else. Slowly, passionately. Expressing every single word of affection she had kept from you into every press of her lips to yours. 

she didn’t know how long it had been, just that you seemingly had no intentions of breaking away and she wasn’t about to either. So you kissed until her lungs began to protest, reluctantly detaching her lips from yours but not moving more than an inch or two away. 

She’d lied to herself before she thought. That this was actually when you looked the prettiest. 

“ I think that was a pretty good apology “ you whispered, your breath fanning onto her lips in a way that made her shiver “ you still have to grovel “ 

“ I’m aware sweetheart. I’m aware “ 

[randomyuu]

the way it follows you home, the stories i never told

My guy Vox once again graced us with lovely Goyuu fanfics, and the way it follows you home, the stories i never told, made me go FERAL.

Time travel? Two Gojou Satorus? Double affection for our sunshine Yuuji? Yuuji sandwich? What feels like possible continuation of (you'll whisper, serpent tongue) what you fear you have become???

FUCK.

I need to stop indulging my imagination too much. I should’ve been content with writing long-ass comments but noooooo, my brain goes “you gotta draw it”. DAMMIT VOX, YOU AND YOUR DELICIOUS WRITINGS HHHHHH

So… usually I should’ve picked a favourite scene that is within my drawing capability, but I just… love all three chapters??? So I made a questionable time investment? I can’t stop??? Help???

This is probably the most ambitious fanart project I’ve ever done so far. Fair enough, considering I might combust if I keep these welled-up emotions inside from reading Vox’s Goyuu fics. Fuck.

Fic info:

Title: the way it follows you home, the stories i never told

Author: @voxofthevoid

Pairing: YuuGoGo. Future!Yuuji, Future!Gojou, Teen!Gojou

(idk why I laugh writing YuuGoGo. I’m beyond help)

Currently, it is 3 chapters out of 8. And it’s gonna be NSFW chapter 4 onwards, so don’t forget to read the tags first, folks!

The drawings are under Read More, because I have lots of thoughts surrounding each chapter and drawings. It’ll be hella long if I didn’t hide it here. It was a mess down there. A combination of hours before, during, and after I read said fic. I’d say good luck finding the art among the sea of jumbled words but… you’ll find them easily. Don’t worry about it haha

SPOILERS FOR ALL 3 CHAPTERS! I highly recommend reading those first before diving into these drawings!

Also for the comics, read from right to left please!

From here on, I will be referring to the Future!Gojou as Gojou and the teenage one as Satoru.

Overall, drawing all these is fun! Really fun! This project pushed me quite hard, forcing me to test my limit (because I rarely draw this much back to back). Since this is a combination of drawings and comics, the coloring style will not be consistent. In a way, I want to try some brushes I never get to use, as well as try out my new graphic tablet. Drawing these got me giggling because I was finally able to let loose during line art. It's much easier to do so, and sometimes I just get to reread the fic and giggle to myself for the nth time.

CHAPTER 1:

Whooo. Whooooooooo—

Ok, ok, the premise is just that good. It intrigued me, fascinated me, and I just… oomph. I cannot refuse a Time Travel Yuuji Sandwich. Sign me up.

Honestly, there are two scenes that are just… a bit too clear in my mind when reading this chapter. That would be the one I drew above, and the other is when Yaga called Gojou to come outside of the class. I love, loooove how Vox wrote Satoru’s POV. And when Yuuji fucking giggles?

I lost it.

Can you imagine, drawing Yuuji grins, with shiny stuff, maybe some sunlight, just purely happy and indulging Gojou?

Help me, for I am drowning in my love and adoration for Yuuji.

Page 2 is an experiment on using harsh black as shading (kind of?). I really enjoyed colouring Yuuji, and drawing those buffalo skulls! I wish I can grasp the concept of contrast a bit better tho :v

CHAPTER 2:

This is probably the only chapter where I picture still images instead of comic panels. A bit like those cool chapter covers in mangas. The one I really, really want to draw is the scene with Satoru on the table. Can’t pass the opportunity to highlight Satoru being a brat, albeit a really cool brat.

Cool idea drawing always proves to be a challenge, because of course my artistic skill just so happens to be below the requirement. Thank you, Sketchfab, for the chair and desk’s perspective otherwise I’m screwed lmao

The second scene that I want to draw the most is this:

Gojou is one step away from climbing Yuuji. Also, I have a bit of a problem picturing a man pouting that makes him look crazy instead, so please have Gojou pouting adorably instead. Because, as Yuuji said (with love), Gojou is (also) a brat.

This is possibly my favorite art in this project, after Yuuji's in Chapter 1 page 2. It's clean because I don't have to draw background, and I was having a fun time drawing Yuuji. And Gojou's squishy cheek as well.

Oh, actually, there is a “manga” scene in this chapter. It’s when Yuuji said, “I love Satoru.”

I just—

AAAAAHHHHH YUUJIIIIIII YOU AND VOX ARE GONNA BE THE DEATH OF ME. That secure relationship between Yuuji and Gojou? Satoru’s description of how Yuuji’s smile could blot out the sun??? Not me screaming 💀 I also see bits of hints of possible co-dependency, though I could be reading those wrong, but either way I’m good. Secure and possessive relationships are fun to consume hhhhhh

But yeah. There are too many wholesome Yuuji smiles in this fic, and I… I am not confident enough to draw genuine happiness. It’s too much for me ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

For this chapter, another reason why I chose these two scenes is just because I want to try and draw cover-worthy pictures of Yuuji and Satoru, and Yuuji and Gojou (cough)

CHAPTER 3:

We start the chapter with Nanamin. Ah, Nanamin. I forgot what his teen self looked like and was surprised to see his design again lmao

I want to draw Yuuji and Nanami scene because… I just want to, I guess. I have never drawn him before (Yaga as well) so that's an interesting challenge. I got two ideas on how I want to draw it. One is a bit painting-esque, and the other one is like another chapter cover. In the end, I chose the cover one because I want to emphasise the difference between teen!Nanami and the Nanami from Yuuji’s original timeline, and how the watch feels like a connection between the same (yet not) person. It’s a bittersweet feeling? In a way?

I’m not really good at explaining my intention ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

I love Yuuji’s answer to Nanami's question.

AND FINALLY.

A Yuuji SandwichTM scene.

And oh B O I do I love it. Have I told you I like every chapter? I probably have. But this one? Satoru’s curiosity, Yuuji’s on-brand self-deprecation, and Gojou come strolling down to show more of Yuuji to his mini-self. I want to draw this whole scene, from Gojou finding them, feeding Yuuji snacks, bitch-slapping Satoru into the backroom, to Yuuji growling. Them trying to hide a boner from Yuuji’s growl got me cackling so hard I LOVE IT 😭

I love it all. Please love Yuuji in my stead, Satoru and Satonyan :3

Oh! Also! 40-finger Yuuji sounds really, really cool! I’ll be happy with whatever Vox will give us in future chapters, but 40-finger Yuuji… possible scene with this timeline’s Sukuna… my god. The action! The drama! The bloodshed! One can only hope.

However, as much as I love that whole scene, it’s still too much for me :”) I’m still not yet confident in delivering the humour and action. Also my already-long drawing plan had my brain groaning in protest so I can’t push my luck :'D

When Gojou said "He looks sweet, but he's a bit of a beast", I kept picturing Yuuji staring innocently, but there was an edge to his look. As if the moment Satoru looks away, he will pounce. But in the end I just stick with innocent-looking Yuuji because I accidentally drew his eyes that way and I want to keep it in lol

Since Satoru points out how soft and cuddly Yuuji is, I also want to draw soft Yuuji :v

And the last one… is the last scene. For some reason, I read that both Gojou and Satoru share Yuuji’s lap and was having a frustrating yet fun time figuring out how it’s… physically possible, without having their butts on the ground because they both are not small at all. As I lined the art, I reread it again and… perhaps I read it wrong? Satoru is beside Yuuji, and not on his lap? So yeah, this one might be the least accurate, but hey, at least you can view it as a crack drawing or something :v

AAAANNNDDD I HAVE EXCEEDED TODAY’S BRAIN CAPACITY OF FORMING WORDS

Have I told you I love this fic?

…I probably have.

Have an amazing week (❁´▽`❁)*✲ﾟ*

[thatfuckinjester]

Aurora being the one to find phantom and not knowing what to do so she curls around him. It’s always worked to help him ground before… she doesn’t know what else to do… she likes the pack, she doesn’t know if she fully trusts them yet… she doesn’t want to upset phantom either, so she curls around him and cries, begging for him to return.

Dew or aether or omega or someone hear her and walk in wondering and fearing what they will find

ik you probably didn't want it to be written like that lmao but i wrote this fic and now i wanted to add another part to it and this fits so perfectly so i'm gonna use this ask for it but if you would like i will 200% write something about this alone without anything that relates to it if yk what i mean lmso

anyways it's about this (especially about the thing i added to it today)

dew was the first one to find phantom, he promised him that he'll never leave him alone again, that he's just going to bring aether, but that did made him break his promise, he was too panicked to really notice.

aurora found him right after, a blanket covered her because it's fucking freezing bit something pulled her out, something made her want to go out.

she saw phantom, leaning on the tree, skin glowing a fainted purple, the tears were already streaming down her face when she got to him.

wrapping her blanket around him because he's colder than rain, it didn't truly do anything, she don't know what to do, she doesn't even fully understand what's going on.

so she started talking, telling him how much she missed him, how she went to his room every night, how he never answered.

aurora slowly curled around him, making him lean against her instead of the tree. telling him how much she's going to miss him, how she'll never forget him.

she doesn't even know where phantom's going, just that he won't stay for longer.

ahe knows that her voice is grounding him, not enough to make him stay but enough that he isn't that scared, isn't on too much pain.

and maybe she ignores the whisper of "thank you, rory." for her own good. she's just focusing on phantom's face until it all fades away.

and when dew and aether finally get there, omega right behind them, it's all too late.

and when they ask her where's phantom and she has to choke back sobs while saying "gone"? that's going to stay with her forever.

at least she can look at the stars and believe that phantom is with them.

anyways goodnight

[yagirlwrites]

(Not) My Baby (4)

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Reader

Synopsis: Y/N makes a decision with the help of her friends but Rafe isn't going to like it.

A/N: Not me posting this at 1am on a Thursday lmao! Y'all it's finally here! Part 4! I have been in such a massive slump and had huge writers block for many months. Honestly don't know how I wrote this tbh🤣 That being said I'm not super happy about my writing here but I'm posting it because y'all deserve to get it immediately, you've waited long enough! Hope you enjoy this part! Love you all❤️

Series Masterlist

My work is my own; it's not to be copied, transferred or translated. Reblogs, comments, feedback are always welcome and appreciated❤️

Happy reading! 🥰

(Not) My Baby (Part 4)

"So what are you gonna do?" Y/N sighed at her friend's question. She knew it was wishful thinking that they might finish breakfast before Stella brought up the issue. To be fair to her, she hadn't mentioned it all night and Y/N managed to actually get some sleep because of it.

But now it was time to face the music and deal with her problem. Fuck.

"What are we talking about?" Lena's voice came from the doorway, the girl looking like she had been through the wringer. The girls at the table almost giggled at her messy appearance, given her usual insistance on being put together at all times.

"Well, hello to you too. Couldn't be bothered sending a text that you'd be home late? Again?" Lena blushed at Stella's words, knowing she was right and she had messed up. Yet again.

Since her and Kelce started dating she had become more and more forgetful of their rule - always let each other know where you're staying the night. They had a few rules in their roomate agreement, this one being the most important one. Hell, she invented the rule herself. And yet, here she was, constantly breaking it.

She knew Stella wasn't really mad, but it still made her feel embarrased. How she let a guy distract her like that so often, she didn't understand.

"Yeah... Sorry." She let out a sheepish smile and Stella rolled her eyes, motioning her to join them at the table.

"While you were getting busy with your man, we have been in a crisis!" Lena's eyes widened, slightly concerned, slightly suspicious.

"Expand." Y/N's head met the table and let out a muffled groan. Lena looked at the girl in confusion.

"What happened??" Stella folded her hands, getting ready for a dramatic retelling. Y/N remained face planted on the table while Stella caught Lena up to the latest drama.

Many 'he did whats' and 'oh my god's' later, interrupted by both Stella's and Lena's laughter at the sandwich incident, Lena was finally in the know about the Rafe situation. And boy was she loving it.

"I fucking knew he was into you! I knew it-"

"Can you please not?" Y/N had gotten up from the table and planted herself on the couch mid-story, not wanting to deal with any of it so early in the morning. Or ever. Preferably she would deal with it never. She just wanted to go back to bed and sleep for several weeks. She was exhausted.

Lena and Stella gave eachother knowing looks but said nothing further about it. Instead they plopped down on the couch either side of her and Y/N knew the ordeal was far from over. They wouldn't let her keep ignoring it. Sometimes she hated having friends who knew her too well.

"So what are you gonna do?" This time it was Lena posing the dreaded question.

"I don't know." It was an honest answer. The only one she had. But she knew her friend would not be satisfied with it.

"Well what do you think?" Y/N closed her eyes, trying to mentally prepare for everything that was about to unfold.

"I don't know...." She sounded tired. And Stella felt a pang of hurt on her friend's behalf.

Lena, however was not going to accept that as an aswer. She was a doer, she always thought three moves ahead and prepared for everything. 'I don't know' was not in her vocabulary. Usually that was someting Y/N loved about her, but at this moment she resented it.

"Well lets figure it out." Lena started. "It is a good opportunity."

"I know that." Y/N begrudgingly admited.

"So what's holding you back?" Y/N looked at Lena as if she was stupid for posing the question. Lena was not bothered.

"Don't say it's cause you don't like him because I know that's not really the reason. You're pragmatic, you know this is a good chance to network. So I'll ask again. What's holding you back?"

While Lena was right about her being pragmatic, she just didn't understand how big of a factor her dislike for Rafe was in her dillema. Whereas Lena couldn't fathom why she'd let something silly like that get in the way of a good opportunity to make connections, she felt sick to her stomach at the thought. The mere idea of being on his arm while he flaunted her was making her flushed with anger. She knew she couldn't explain it to her friends though, so she didn't even try.

"I don't know. I just hate the idea of giving him what he wants and seeing his smug face-"

"You're getting something out of it too." Lena, annoyingly pointed out.

"Not as much as him." At Y/N's words, Lena finally grinned.

"There it is." Lena's words made Y/N look at her in confusion.

"What?"

"What's holding you back. You think its an unfair deal. He's getting more out of it than you are." Lena explained.

Y/N's brow furrowed in thought. Stella was quiet the entire time, knowing not to interrupt the two girls when they're debating something. She learned long ago it was a bad idea. It was best to let them figure it out and not get involved.

Y/N realized Lena was right. She was feeling resentment because she felt like she would be giving him a lot more than she'd be getting in return and it made her real mad.

"Yeah... I guess so." Lena nodded.

"Good."

"Good?" Y/N asked, exasperated.

"Yes, good. Now we know the problem. Now we can solve it." Lena said as if it was the simples thing in the world.

"Oh it's that simple?" Y/N's sarcasm was felt but ignored as Lena continued.

"So what do you want?" Y/N looked at her confused, again.

"What do I want?" She repeated.

"So what do you want that he can give you?" Lena asked again. Y/N frowned.

"Yes. He's getting the better end of the deal. So even the odds." She was explaining it as if it was obvious. Y/N didn't think so.

"I don't want anything from him."

"Don't be stubborn." Lena interrupted. "There's always something you can get from someone. It's just a matter of figuring out what you want."

"I don't want anything from him!" Y/N repeated, a bite in her voice.

"Now you're just being childish."

"Let's not get nasty." Stella finally piped up, seeing that this was not going in the right direction.

"How am I being childish?" Y/N bit out.

"You're letting your feelings cloud your judgement. Stop letting your dislike of him lead the converstation." Lena spoke evenly, making sure not to push Y/N further than she had. They could both be stubborn and they knew it. Lena didn't want to fight. She was just trying to help her friend. The problem was she wasn't always the best at showing it.

"Okay, lets take a step back." Stella interjected. Hands up in what she hoped was a calming gesture.

"I think what Lena is trying to say is that you might be holding yourself back from something that could benefit you because you're letting your feelings for Rafe get in the way of seeing the bigger picture."

"I don't have feelings for Rafe." She quipped back.

"You know what I meant, Peach." Stella's use of her nickname softened Y/N's features some. She was realizing Rafe was now causing her to fight with her friends. The thought infuriated her. No way.

Y/N sighed and closed her eyes, trying to clear her head. They were right. When it came to Rafe, he always managed to unhinge her and anger would lead her actions. But she was smarter than that. She wouldn't let him get in the way of her friendships. And she wasn't going to let him being a dick be the reason why she misses on a good opportunity. One that could do her a lot of good in the future.

That's when it hit her.

When she opened her eyes her friends were looking at her with bathed breaths, anxious for her next move.

"There is something." Lena smiled.

"But he'll never go for it." Y/N was doubting herself. It was crazy.

"Babe, he's in a position where he can't refuse you. He's got a lot to gain from this but he also has a hell of a lot more to lose if you say no." Lena reasoned.

"She's right. I'm pretty sure you could get a kindey out of him if you wanted to." Stella joked and the girls laughed.

"That's a bit much, Pumpkin." Stella beamed at her friends words.

"All we're saying is, he won't be able to refuse you. He's desperate. He needs you." Lena explained.

"Okay." The girls grinned, Stella jumping up in excitement.

"So what is it?!" Y/N smirked. Oh it was a good one and he was going to hate it so much. The thought made her giddy.

--------

It had been days since the sandwich shop. Since he poured all his shame out to her and asked her to help him. Since he embarrased himself thoroughly and put his fate in her hands.

It has been days of radio silence. He was getting antsier every second, feeling like he might crawl out of his skin in suspence. Truth was, he had no idea what was going to happen. She really didn't like him and she could refuse to help him so easily, leaving him the deep deep hole he dug for himself. She didn't owe him anything. He wasn't great to her in the past and he regreted it. Had regreted it for a long time. He tried making things up with her for months but she was so unreceptive to his efforts, and then she pushed his buttons and he'd lose himself all over again.

And now he was at her mercy. She could embarrass him by telling the whole world about what he had done. Or she could just ignore him, letting him stew in his misery. Leaving him stranded and giving his father the perfect opportuinity to cut him off for good. Disown him even. He was losing his mind.

It has been days and everyone around him could feel his sour mood. He was twitchy, easily irritable, incapable of focusing on anything and constantly fiddling with his phone. Constantly writing and deleting texts, to what they assumed was the same mystery person.

None of his friends knew what the hell was going on with him but none dared ask, knowing it would most likely end with him shutting them out further. He was moodier than usual, which they didn't think possible.

Kelce and Topper knew the only person who could ever affect him like that was his father. Or Y/N. Both in very different ways, of course, but in simmilar intensity.

His friends never knew what it was that him and Y/N had going on, never understood the odd relationship. They knew they'd get punched if they brought it up though, they learned it the hard way.

His father was a whole other story. They both knew, for the most part, how Ward Cameron treated his son. Having grown up with Rafe, they'd seen enough of their fraught dynamic to understand there were serious issues there. Their friend never confided in them fully though, preferring not to talk about his father at all. But every once in a while he'd get that glazed over look in his eyes, the dark cloud around him palpable. They knew then that something had happened involving his father.

This time was different though. He wasn't depressed, he wasn't angry from an argument with his dad. He also wasn't buzzing with nerves and excitement from a row with Y/N. It was unusal and unnerving and the entire appartment was enveloped in the odd energy.

So when Kelce had insisted he needed a night out Topper agreed. Kelce had demanded he needed to unwind and that after football practice he expected his two best friends to take him out for drinks and help him get his head straight. They agreed, Topper knowing Klece's plans had nothing to do with his own well being - and Rafe because Kelce rarely ever expressed that he was having issues, usually the most chill out of the group. It made him feel too guilty to reject him. Even though he'd rather do anything but go out tonight.

But there he was, waiting for Kelce to finish up his practice so they can go to the bar where he fully intended to excuse himself after an hour. The sun was just beginning to set as he fiddled with his phone in his hands, willing it to do something, snap him out of his misery. The orange and pinkish hues enveloped the sky as he heard someone approach him in the parking lot. He was leaning on his car as he looked behind him and nearly dropped his phone in shock.

There she was. She was standing right in front of him, the last rays of sun casting a halo around her. She took his breath away.

For a moment he stood there gaping at her, not quite able to process that she was actually here after days of no contact, after days of him wishing she'd call or text or even email him, give him anyhing to go by.

She cleared her throat, breaking the awkward silence. He snapped out of his daze and took an unconscious step forward. She eyed him warily. He looked rough. As if he hadn't slept.

A sliver of guilt crossed through her but she quickly crushed that down. This whole situation is his fault and she had every right to take even more time, than just a few days, to get back to him. She reminded herself to keep her head in the game, to not get distracted.

"Hey." She spoke first.

"Hey." He sounded breathy, unsure.

"Can we talk?" He nodded, nervous to what she was there to say. He wasn't sure how she found him but guessed she probably talked to Lena. Lena would know he was waiting for Kelce.

"I've thought about your proposition." He gulped, bracing himself for the worst.

"Yeah?" He wished she would just rip off the band-aid and reject him instead of dragging it out.

"I've realized you'd be getting a lot more out of it than me -"

"What do you want?" He interrupted her, cringing inwardly at the sharp glare he was met with. But he couldn't wait another second.

"For future notice, I want you to not interrupt me again." He almost rolled his eyes, almost.

"Noted. What do you want?" He sounded nervous and she almost smiled. Almost.

She looked to he right, taking her time to apreciate his vehicle, letting him stew for a few more agonizing moments while he waited for her answer.

He looked at her, impatient, ready to jump out of his skin, shake her, fall to his knees, beg her to just say it.

Her eyes met his again and she smiled. It was a beautiful sight, but he quickly realized the smile was one of mischief. His eyes narrowed in suspicion. She glanced back at his car. Then back to him. Then back to the car. Then back to him. She gave him a pointed look, raising her eyebrows.

He looked on in confusion and she rolled her eyes at his ignorance.

"The car." She finally spoke. His heart was hammering in his chest from the suspense.

"Huh?"

She looked back at the car and he followed her eyes finally realizing what it was she was saying.

"No way." He spoke before he could even process his words. She nodded her head.

"Okay." She shrugged, swiflty turned around and started walking away. No look back, no explanation, no chance to barter. Panic rose in his chest.

"Wait!" She stopped in her tracks but didn't bother turning around. His mind was running a thousand miles an hour. This couldn't be what she was asking of him? Surely she wasn't that crazy? Surely she didn't expect him to give her his car.

His car. A black, 1967 Ford Mustang, complete with white stripes. A picture of sleek elegance and power, with the classic leather interior and and an upgraded motor, the rev of which caused goosebumps to rise on his skin every time he turned on the key. His pride and joy. The first thing he ever bought for himself. His father protested, of course he did. He would have preferred a more modern vehicle, something that showed status. Not an old muscle car. But Rafe was adamant and as soon as he turned eighteen and got access to his trust fund, he found Clarence and never looked back.

She was his most trusted companion, which is why it was hitting hard that Y/N wanted to take her from him. Couldn't she have picked anything else?

"You seriously want me to just give you my car?" His voice was incredulous. She turned around and calmly walked back to him, as if she had all the time in the world.

"Of course not. I'm not that cruel. Or crazy." She smirked while he looked at her in confusion. What was she getting at?

"I don't expect you to give it to me. Not forever anyway." He blinked at her, still confused.

"I want free use of your car for... In the name of fairness, let's say I'd get to keep it for as long as this charade lasts." His heart was slowing down some, glad she wasn't insisting on actually taking his car from him.

"So... when was it you told your family we were dating, again?" He gulped, redness on his neck and cheeks visible.

"Three months ago" he almost whispered. Her eye twitched but she forced herself to stay calm. The prick.

"And how long did you tell them we've been together?" He gupled again. This was more and more emabrrassing with every minute.

"Three months." She swallowed down her anger that was rising again at his bullshit.

"So let's say six months backlog... and however long this continues. That's how long I get to keep the car. That sound fair to you?"

He wanted to say no. To argue. To call her crazy and beg her to pick something, anything else. But by the look in her eyes he knew it would be pointless and only serve to further his embarrassement. She was determined. This is what she wants. And he has no choice but to give it to her. He has no fucking choice and she knows it.

"Fine. But-" she interrupts him before he can finish his sentence.

"Gas included." He nearly choked on his saliva at her words. She was pushing him to his limits. She wanted him to pay for her gas too, while she drove his car around flaunting it in his face. The redness on his face was now also from anger. She was enjoying this.

"Fine. Fine!" She smiled.

"But that's it!" He continued. "I agree to this and we have a deal? You'll do it? No second guessing, no going back on it. You'll do it?"

He was looking at her with such desparation it tugged at her heart. This really was important to him.

"Yeah. Yeah I'll do it." She nodded along with her words.

He felt like crying. It was as if a ton of weight was lifted off his shoulders. He was still upset about Clarence. Obviously he was. But mostly he was relieved and happy that he wouldn't have to be embarrassed in front of his family. That she was going to do it. She was going to help him. He wanted to hug her in thanks or yell at her for manipulating him. He wanted to pass out from all the stress - of the situation, of the past few days, of suspence.

"So when's this wedding?" She dreaded asking because if there's anything this situation had taught her is that Rafe always can and will piss her off more than she thought possible. Every single time.

He was nervous again. He sighed and Y/N knew she wasn't going to like the words that came out of his mouth.

"Two weeks." He finally said.

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

----

Taglist: if anyone wants to be tagged in future work let me know; @r0und3bitch @lovelornanonymity @mentallynot-here @wishing-i-was-rafes-princess @goldenjo @emeloyy @kanib45 @clinelyn @magnificantmermaid @hey-sunrisee @mannstarkey @harringtonstudios @totallynotkaibiased @popcrone818 @bookaholics-stuff @zzzina7 @fangirlwithlou @namelesssav @rafesxgold @cmac-writes @malfoytargaryen @alinaharlow @mveggieburger @theyluvmesblog @withbeautyandrage @sierrahhh @harrys-humble-housewife @piceous21 @vifuckingp @ditzyballerina @xoxo3m1ly @jessmaybank @whore-4-drewstarkey @palmwinemami @mew227 @dustbunniess @sublimepenguinpeach-blog @starkowswife

[ethereal-bumble-bee]

drawing idea: 92sies spot showing kid blink how to shoot a slingshot and telling him to close his (left or right) eye (whichever one’s not covered) and kid blink just dead stares him until he gets it

Note: I am definitely not artistically gifted (lmao), so I wrote a quick oneshot instead of drawing this, because this is a really funny idea and I needed to write it. Hope you enjoy!!!

    “Ok, so line it up, take a deep breath, and… damn it, missed again.”

Kid Blink sighed in disdain as his arms dropped to his sides, glaring from the slingshot in his hand to the still-standing beer bottle a few feet in front of him. They’d been at it for hours now, at least, Spot unhelpfully instructing him on how to shoot the damned contraption and Blink missing the empty bottle every single time.

The shorter boy next to Blink groaned, pressing a hand to his temple. “Come on. It ain’t that hard, Blink. What about ‘look at the target and shoot’ is so hard for you to understand?”

“Gimme a minute, asshole,” Blink snapped. “I’ve almost got it, it’s just— how do you even aim this thing anyways? It’s impossible.”

Spot rolled his eyes before snatching the slingshot out of the other newsie’s hands, grabbing a pebble off the ground at their feet and loading up the ammo. “Fine. Watch an’ learn.”

With a quick motion, Spot pulled the string back, closing his right eye and screwing his face in concentration, letting the pebble go in a swift motion and watching with a satisfied smirk as it hit the bottle with a clink, knocking it over onto the ground. Blink tried to hide his annoyance as Spot turned back to him, raising an eyebrow.

“See? It’s easy— just close your right eye, concentrate, and shoot.”

For a moment, Blink didn’t quite see the issue, but as Spot handed him back the slingshot, the ridiculousness of that instruction hit him like a truck. “Conlon,” he started, but Spot cut him off as he set up the target once more.

“Now quit your whinin’ and try again, got it? We ain’t leavin’ until you knock over that bottle.”

“Conlon,” Blink tried again, but the younger kid was already waiting expectantly, tapping his foot as if every second Blink delayed was an agonizing inconvenience to him. Sighing, but seeing the perfect opportunity to annoy the other, Blink closed his good eye, loading up a pebble and blindly shooting.

The next thing he heard was an angry “Ow!” from Spot, and he opened his eye just as the other grabbed him by the collar.

“The hell was that for, Kid?” Spot growled. “Lookin’ for a soakin’?”

“It’s not my fault,” Blink protested, unable to help the cheeky grin that spread across his face. “I can’t see anythin’ with my eye closed.”

Spot blinked once, then stepped back, turning red as he realized.

“… Oh.”

[waitmyturtles]

THE MORNING AFTER: ONLY FRIENDS, EPISODE 8 ("TAKE A LOOK AT YOURSELF IN THE MIRROR AND CRY") EDITION

Oh my gosh, I am shaking my head and just laughing. I have no idea where to start writing this, but it's gonna be damn fun to pick this episode apart.

Because of the clues that Jojo Tichakorn (below) and Ninew Pinya dropped before and during the episode's airing yesterday, my mind was totally on Freddie and Queen. I captured the tweet below and couldn't help but think of lyrics.

And the episode was titled "Save Me"!

Before I go on, I have a little personal note. During my watch of MAME's TharnType, I talked a bit about the bigotry against the queer community that I grew up with in my Indian family. During my childhood, Freddie Mercury was -- everything. He was everything to me. A part-Indian man who blasted past any obstacles that could have held him back to become a superstar, while leveraging unbelievable talent. My dad often wanted to snap my Queen CDs in half to keep Freddie out of our house. Up until I went to college, when a new world of music awaited me, Queen was MY BAND. I'll never forget watching his memorial concert on television in 1992, watching Axl Rose destroy "We Will Rock You," and subsequently watching Axl host a Queen documentary on MTV that got repeated for years and years. This shit was formative to my childhood, and I'm gonna guess, to Jojo's and Ninew's childhoods as well. We be old bags in here.

I'll get back to Freddie in a few minutes. but besides all of the Queen themes (quick note: the dude that Sand was about to make out with was wearing the same costume that Ninew caught in his IG stories, as Freddie sang "Love of My Life"), oh my fucking god, did this episode ever touch upon ephemerality, highs and lows, change, and a resistance to change that people have unto others.

Top and Cheum -- especially Top -- were clutching their pearrrrrllllsss at Mew's changes.

Top and Cheum notice that Mew's trying on a new suit. And Mew admits it! He says to Ray in the bookstore -- after the most BRILLIANT call-out to a BL trope if I ever saw one, the CRACKING of the romantic memories montage, which, omg, are we EVER seeing in Dangerous Romance, like three times a bleeping episode, LMAO -- "I'm bored with myself."

I love -- I hate it, but I love that this episode calls it out -- I love that Top and Cheum are calling this behavior out as if it were a bad thing.

Is it?

.... is it not okay for university students to take a bump of coke if they're curious about it? Barack Obama did it -- and Obama admitted it, AND wrote about it, AND became president, twice. Judge him, I dare ya.

On another side, Nick susses out Boston, and wants to check in with him. Boston wants Nick to go bye-bye. Nick tries a guilt pull. And Boston ain't having it.

Fuck. (Side note, Boston was my man this episode.)

I'm shaking my head in wonder for Mew and Boston to be addressing Top, Cheum, and Nick in this way. We've established (here and here, cc @ranchthoughts and others) that the kind of toxicity that this OF group of friends exhibits is just -- common, and pedestrian, and awful to think about existing, but in part, it's so awful for us to be thinking about it, because actually, it's ever-present in our lives, and so many of us survive dealing with other people on a daily basis by using means by which to ignore or avoid that toxicity, like our addictions to our phones, or addictions to other vices, like sex and drugs -- which takes us right back to Only Friends.

The dynamic I saw happening in this episode was like vultures (the friends) circling their prey (their friends), but instead of the friends eating their friends -- what some of the friends are doing is trying to correct the behavior of their other friends. Top and Cheum want Mew to... go back to being the old Mew, maybe. Nick wants Boston to know -- morally, I think you're a bad person. And Boston says, I paraphrase, "see. if. I. fucking. care." and literally creates the NeoTitle ship before our eyes, lmao, all while walking silently and ignoringly away from Nick.

Top, to Mew, says, "Are you sure?" Are you sure you want to be like this now, Mew? Cheum shares with Top her concern about Mew's changes, and literally teams up with Top to bring Top back to Mew to, what, straighten Mew out?

Last time I checked, Mew's a big boy. Mew's made his decisions to be with Ray, to drink with Ray, to snort coke with Ray. Are those behaviors questionable? Sure. Are they normal behaviors for a university student who is bored with himself, and wants to try something new? 100%.

I have written before, in my review of Theory of Love, that while behavioral change can oftentimes be massively difficult, there's another side to change that needs to be considered. When one person changes -- there are many others within that person's sphere that do not want that specific person TO change. If one individual changes, within a worldview of a group -- that changes a group dynamic. People like Top and Cheum are unsettled that Mew and Ray are dating, and that Mew's getting wasted and high. Are they rightfully concerned for Mew's health? For sure. But what about Mew's agency and happiness? Are the friends understanding that this is actually Mew's choice to do these things, regardless of how the friends judge his specific actions?

The fact that Top and Cheum are questioning Mew's agency, to me, is a ROOT, a FOUNDATION of the awful toxicity of this friend group, BESIDES the general drunkenness of the group, and Ray's particularly contradictory and dangerous behavior. THERE IS NO TRUST IN THIS GROUP.

Top and Cheum do not TRUST Mew -- an adult young man!!!! -- to make his own decisions. Cheum doesn't trust Boston with her little bro (oh, woops on that, big sis). Almost no one trusts Ray, although I'm not sure about Mew on that. Boston doesn't trust Nick. The list goes on.

Without trust, without a foundation of love and respect, without an acknowledgement that individuals within a group have agency to live their lives independently -- what you get in a group dynamic is UTTER mush, just a bucket of vomit like what we're seeing here in Only Friends. I am OBSESSED that Jojo and team are picking this apart SURGICALLY, and asking US to question OUR, the viewers', judgement of all of this. These friends are contradictory as fuck. Boston was SO right to ask Nick: "who are you to judge?" Nick acted as filthily as Boston in violating Boston's privacy and rights -- TWICE, bros, TWICE.

And Top.... @lurkingshan said it the best yesterday when she made sure the girlies knew that what Top was doing TO (NOT FOR, TO) Mew at the end of the episode was not consensual. Welp. Tie up Mew's agency with a bow and throw it out into the fucking dumpster, Top.

I haven't touched as much on the Sand/Ray dynamic in this post, but of characters that are acting at least consistently to their... what, their moral judgements or ethical structures, at least Sand, Ray, and Boston remain consistent in my eyes. Anyone who was surprised at Ray's behavior in this episode -- it was bad and icky, and the episode laid it on thick, but I found his behavior to be expectedly toxic.

This was a two-steps-forward-and-one-step-back episode for Sand, as I see it, as he stepped in to try to keep Ray from going to jail (and how interesting was it that it was Top who ended up sealing that deal). One other note about Sand: the show HAS to be making fun of First's inability to sing, right? That guitar practice in 2/4, oof. And to have Sand dress up as Freddie, one of the most magnificent singers in rock -- ironic. We know that Sand doesn't aspire to be a singer; he just wants to go to festivals, and... that's the right decision, my dude.

Anyway. To bring this back to Freddie and Queen. Talk about shapeshifting. In his 20s in the 1970s, Freddie Mercury started out with long hair and flowing, robe-y costumes. As the 1980s progressed, he took on an identity of a mustachioed, slightly muscular man -- very, very closeted, but clearly gay to anyone who caught the signal.

The dude that Sand was about to make out with at the party? He made a reference to Mary Austin, Freddie's longtime companion and best friend. They were lovers for a short period, before Freddie came out to her. And they remained friends all of the rest of his life. While Freddie died with a longtime lover by his side in Jim Hutton, Mary was always present and devoted to Freddie. Mary's presence often caused consternation with Freddie's lovers, especially after his death, what with inheritance controversies. But no one ever questioned Mary's loyalty, and her commitment to keeping Freddie's identity secret and safe.

Freddie and Mary's friendship was in part a protective arrangement for his life in the closet. He only revealed he had AIDS the day before he died. But Freddie claimed the friendship, claimed agency to it, and wanted it in his life. The friendship was steady, and never wavering.

Quite the opposite of the devotions, or lack thereof, in this group. These young folks are demonstrating NORMAL resistance to watching each other change. But while that resistance is normal... it doesn't make it all the less toxic. I'm afraid that as of right now, I read that all of these friends want to sell each other out for the sake of their own selfish desires, and for the benefit of their own worldviews alone.

HAPPY SUNDAY, Ephemerality Squad, if we can be happy after this demonstration of toxicity, ha! @slayerkitty @ranchthoughts @chickenstrangers @lurkingshan @twig-tea @distant-screaming @clara-maybe-ontheroad @neuroticbookworm @elizabethsebestianhedgehog @thatgirl4815

[lorebeth]

Hey! Could you write a Blade x princess reader?

A princess like Aelin Galathynius from throne of glass. She’s a badass who used to be an assassin once and who wields fire power.

HIII I am so sorry this is so late I’ve been sick for 3 months and I literally lost all sense of reality for a while. BUT I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to keep the fire powers or not so I kept it as friendly as I could for any type of power! I hope that I wrote the reader well because if I’m being completely serious I had to search up Aelin Galathynius and I was NOT DISAPPOINTED!!! i was actually considering getting the novels so you’re literally a life saver! ANYWAYS I HOPE I MADE THIS WORTHWHILE AND THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST LOVELY!!

Blade x Princess! Reader

TW: Romantic (but can be read as platonic - just skip or ignore the dream part), kind of emotionally constipated reader..? War, blood, probably something incorrect in there lmao…

Sword fighting came to you easily. Your powerful strikes are full of precision and poise, your stance is always perfect and agile as well as your sharp mind. Your reaction time in battle was excellent and you were extremely proud of yourself.

You had to learn your cutthroat style from a young age, it’s a kill or be killed world and the only way to protect yourself was to become the predator, the top of the food chain. You also need extremely tentative wording and persuasive language to get information, as well as a keen eye for what is beneath the surface of every turmoil or hidden threat in one’s words.

This is your last mission. With a certain childhood friend at your back supporting you all throughout your younger and teen years, you know very well this could be the last you see of him.

But he wasn’t an idiot, you both understood that much.

As you both crouched and huddled under the cover of a bush - your bag of magical artifacts attached to your right thigh - you couldn’t help but realise how easy this was. It was extremely suspicious and you had to ask your companion for advice.

“You know what I’m going to say to you.” you whispered.

He chuckled, his rich laugh contrasting with his disheveled and dirty clothing. As much as the throne was your birthright, he also deserved luxuries you both could only dream of outside of a world of stealing. His hair was tied up in a high ponytail and your family’s medallion was attached as a brooch on his right chest strap. His trousers hung low and were stained with mud, his boots carrying a dagger in them. He turned to face you, golden eyes stalking your figure, you didn’t want to meet his yet.

“I think we should use our distraction.” his voice hoarse and unused. You both ran out of water preparing magical components at the base of the city and nearly two days staking out the perfect time to strike. The Rebels were planted in the lower and abandoned parts, ready for the signal.

You’ve been through worse however, this was child’s play compared to the gruesome training you forced upon yourself.

“Mm. Any last words, Blade?” you turned to look into his piercing eyes. They held broken shards of who he used to be, the child with big dreams and the broken promises he was gifted instead.

He grabbed your hand, gently raising the back of your gloved hand to his lips, kissing it. He slowly slid the black scarf over his nose again and squeezed your hand softly once. He would be at your side until the end.

You couldn’t help smile to yourself. Blade was your best friend, always at your beck and call, he knew you were never going to give up on him and he in turn never gave up on you.

Sometimes there’s a dream that almost haunts you at the peacefulness and domesticity it promises. It’s you with Blade in a beautiful bedroom, the light shining in and the wind blowing softly through the soft, pearl-coloured balcony curtains. The room covered in soft greens and faint reds that remind you of beautiful flowers. The silk bedsheet feeling blissful on your back as you stare up at Blade sleeping, his nose scarred and you always end the dream by running your fingers gently over it and kissing his nose, never getting past that scene.

It haunted you and you hated it, but fuck would you do anything for that moment to be reality. As much as you didn’t have time for romance in a fight for the throne, you could only crave it like how a force as powerful and chaotic as fire depends on something vital as oxygen to keep it alive, stronger than ever.

Of course you’d never tell him that though, it’s better for things to be left unsaid; especially in war. You took off yours and his masks, cupping his face gently. You’d never tell him how you felt, but actions always speak louder than words. You stared at him and pressed your lips against his cheek, inches away from his lips. You place his mask back on gently and he does the same for you. 

“Are you ready?”

“I’ll follow you to the ends of the world if it means you are happy.” 

___________________________

It was a fucking massacre. Blood on the walls, the curtains torn and glass windows shattered. Swords thrown haphazardly into all directions on the floor and half of the city glowing blue and white due to the “distraction” in the lower parts of the city. Whoever thought it was a good idea for Illegal Blue Flame Charms was on something as it wasn’t in the plan. You were trying to take back your city, not destroy it to fucking cinders. But you digress, you need to find the King.

As you stalk through the sinister hallways your boots make crunching sounds on the glass shards. You didn’t bother making your arrival quiet, you didn’t need to because the King already knew you were here, just like you promised.

“Well. I’ll be damned.” A cough erupted from a corner of darkness. The voice hauntingly familiar even through the strain and coughing fit. 

He didn’t deserve to get a reply, after slaughtering your parents and exiling their only daughter lucky enough to escape, the promise you made that day would finally come true. You would get your Kingdom back and murder the one who endangered your people, taxed them to nothingness and celebrated the death of two brilliant parents and rulers. 

As you raised your hand, you felt the familiar heat and energy in your palm, your fingertips glowing that lovely colour you’ve grown to adore. The blue of the outside fire and destruction was weak compared to the light emitting from your hand, and you landed the final blow. After years of trauma and terror, running away and the fear of being caught… you’ve never felt safer.

___________________________

The citizens - your people - adored you. Obviously, anyone would be better than the Dictator who was their last leader but you were their true heir, the one best fit to take control over the Kingdom again.

The first thing you did after you killed the King was find Blade. He was a skilled swordsman but even he wasn’t untouchable. He was injured and on the brink of passing out when you found him. He knew you had won and immediately fell on his knees to congratulate and bow down to you, a smirk on his face and blood trickling down the left side of his head, making him close his eye to stop it trickling into it. There was a cut on his nose now, that’ll scar for sure.

You had appointed him as your Head Guard and crowned him the highest honours you could bestow upon a man. He might as well have been a King himself.

Standing in your old bedroom, you made your way to the balcony watching over the city. The sun was setting and everything was gorgeous hues of golds and pinks.

The rebuilding of the city was going smoothly and no civilians were critically injured due to the Blue Flame Charms set around the different parts of the city, only the abandoned buildings were gone and could be easily replaced with new homes, markets and trading ports. Taxes that were stupid had been reset and everyone could finally breathe without having to rely on Loan Sharks or crime to live and support their families. Those who had lost their jobs and homes had been invited to the Castle and given jobs to help repair, as well as given food and water for their families. The old were taken to spare rooms and wherever someone could take them in. The Kingdom was working together better than ever before and it was all thanks to you and the rebels.

“What are you thinking about?” The voice of your Head Guard questioned. You turned around and smiled at him. You had changed your clothes and so did he, he was gorgeous with new clothing, better hygiene, nicely combed hair, beautiful brooches on his straps and delicate embroidered roses on his coat. His outfit was composed of blacks, dark greens and the blood reds from his roses. 

“You.” He looked unimpressed.

“Sure.” He came to stand beside you on the balcony of your childhood bedroom, staring ahead as you continue to eye him.

“You know I wouldn’t have known what to do if I had lost you.” you whisper, the words holding a deeper meaning. His head turned in your direction, still not making eye contact with you. The sunset was illuminating his face and every scar, blemish and bandage on his face made him even more godly than before. 

“Don’t look at me like that.” he turned to stare at you now, his eyes pleading. You smiled at him and laughed.

“A dear friend once told me, ‘I’ll follow you to the ends of the world if it means you are happy.’ I think he was right.” His laugh was pure and he embraced you. 

The tears in your eyes stung and you felt all your panic and anxiety over the years slip, even if the trauma would be there forever you felt safe enough to forget about pain and misery in his arms. 

“I am forever with you, Y/N. As your Head Guard, your Consultant and most importantly, your friend.” He kissed the top of your head sweetly and you couldn’t help sob happily as you laid in the safest arms of all.

___________________________

(Romantic: if you don’t want romance and only platonic I suggest ending it there. Thanks!)

You approached the man sat on the balcony step, circling your arms around his shoulders and pulling him back into your open arms, him coming into contact with your chest and sighing deeply. 

“What’s wrong? Don’t like my hugs?” You teased.

“I hate that you don’t take me seriously.” He stated blandly. You look down at him confused. What’s he on about? 

“What are you talking about? If I thought you were a joke you wouldn’t be my Head Guard, or in my arms for that matter.” you offered him a teasing smile and squeezed him a little harder.

“What I mean is you don’t take my advances seriously.” he scoffed. 

What.

“Advances? What exactly have you done that was in a ‘courting fashion’?” you might as well have been given a blank piece of paper and sent out to go shopping because what fucking advances has he given you? 

He turned around to face you and he had an exasperated expression, going through all 5 stages of grief trying to explain himself to you, “Y’know.. I gave you my last dessert. And I held you last week.” you stared at him blankly.

“You gave me your half-eaten pudding and you pushed me off the street into a muddy puddle because a carriage was driving by. The carriage wasn’t even close to the side walk may I add.” he sighed again and stared ahead, acting like a neglected child.

You laughed and soon your entire body couldn’t stop shaking at how hard you were laughing, Blade was still sulking in your arms and that made you stop momentarily.

“You know, those advances may not be, traditional per say… but it’s the thought that counts. And I might add, I’ve also been wanting you to court me too.” you finished with one of your hands cupping his cheek and the other holding onto his arm.

“I had great advances.” he deadpanned.

With the biggest eye roll you could muster, you leaned in gently, allowing him to have a moment to decide whether he wanted to kiss you too or back out. When he didn’t move you got a little confused, opting to back out. 

He slowly inclined his head forward and with a excited smile you leaned in the full way, lips pressing against his. At first you did all the movements and set the pace, letting Blade adapt to the kiss. 

His hands snaked around your waist and the wrist of the hand that was cupping his face. He soon felt you pull away from the kiss for air and he took the opportunity to kiss your wrist gently. His eyes piercing yours once again. 

“My chosen protector, my closest companion and my heart, will you stay with me forever, until death do us part?” you asked, suddenly feeling all emotions you could possibly think of in that small silence overtaking your senses. You felt nervous but excited and you felt yourself trembling all in one.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.” he smiled. 

istg I had whooping cough or smth wtf