#i just want ti go to sleep but i cant my sleep schedule has been so miserably depressing me

[nt3000s]

im so lucky to know so many people in my life to have met so many people in my life that are just life saving ill never not feel lucky people are so beautiful and kind and talented and funny and have so much worth everyone ive ever met anyone in my life i have ever touched i just cant believe it ill never be able to understand it how important everyone is how much i love people the degree to whihc i love people and everyone i have ever met ill just never ever be able to express the depth of how important it is to me it might be the most important part of my entire life. i just need people to know how much i love them im desperate for it to be known how important everyone ive ever met is to me. all of my friends everyone whos ever been kind to me and whoever ive been kind to it will never be lost on me how important it is. and i feel so lucky to be graced i guess by my friends. i cant imagine the life i would live without every event every person who ive ever crossed. i would never sacrifice anything to not be where i am now because of the people i know and have known. the people i know and talk to everyday or the people i see in a notification or pass by. i cant overstate your importance to me. i cant overstate how important i want people to feel. i want people to see themselves how i see them. i can not overstate your importance to me and i love you. im so lucky ill never be able to take it

[nr1chaedickrider]

'i just can't leave you alone.'

need her so bad actually...... been thinking about perv nayeon sooo much.. real jihyo fans know where the title is from hehehe

cw: kinda stalker nayeon??, voyeurism (idk if its the right term but the members are next to them), unnie kink (aka nayeon gets turned on by you calling her unnie), dubcon, somnophilia, idk maybe even gaslighting? light bondage (hands are tied together)

not proofread bc its six in the morning im tired sorry for mistakes

_______________________________________

Nayeon, the oldest member of twice, is especially known for her love for the maknae line, especially you. Being the youngest member with 23, she always took care of you like the good unnie she is!!

But what if her care for you goes too far?

_______________________________________

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!" the member flood the gc with messages as soon you wake up.

You're now 24 years old.

You already know that the members planned something for you, especially nayeon.

She is behaving weird since some weeks...

Pictures of you sleeping appearing in your room after you come back home from schedule.. Its like she is watching you.

But its normal... right???

Its nothing bad. Or weird.

_______________________________________

You dress up, walking to the living room since its now later in the day, and the members of course want to celebrate with their dear maknae.

"hi guys" you greet them as you walk into the living room, they all smile at you and hug you, nayeon hugging you, but not wanting to let go.

"I love you so much Y/n, happy birthday!! Ive prepared something special just for you.." she whispers the last part. Sending you shivers down your spine.

You try ignoring it, starting conversations with your members, playing games, drinking and other stuff.

But it was like someone was watching you the whole time.

Of course, after some time, the members (actually mostly just jeongyeon and jihyo..) want to play with minas switch, so they start playing mario party. Nayeon sits down next to you on the couch while the other members are busy being competitive.

You feel a finger trace your thigh under the blanket.

You look at Nayeon who smirks at you.

"Nayeon- what are you doing" you whisper-shout, taking her hand and putting it away.

"Shhh.. you dont want them to hear, dont you?" she whispers into your ear, nibbling on it as she places her hand on your core.

"i-" your shocked.

Why is she doing this?

She cant.

She is like your big sister!

"nayeon stop-" you try pushing her away without the members noticing.

She thrusts her fingers inside, making you let out a whine which you quickly cover eith a cough.

The members are too busy playing those stupid games.

You try to hide your moaning, it feels good... But you cant do this.

"nayeon please-" you still try to push her away, her fingers burried deep inside of you.

She pulls her fingers out.

"Come to my room in an hour." she whispers seducingly in your ear.

What is she doing?

_______________________________________

You stand infront of Nayeons door, knocking.

Once, Twice.

She pulls you into her room, shutting the door and locking it.

A soft black silk cloth touches your wrist. You cant even progress what happens.

She pushes you to her bed, your wrists tied together in a tight knot.

"Nayeon-" you try to say something but she pushes you so much, you fall onto the bed.

She looks down at you, only know you realise she has almost nothing on.

"Im tired of doing this only when you're asleep.." she says, sitting down on your lap as she starts kissing your neck, sucking on it like a wild animal.

You let out some whimpers.

"Nayeon please- what do you mean-" you look at her while she eagerly takes of your shirt.

Your bra lands on the floor right after she took of your shirt.

"Your nipples are so hard... You just want me to suck them. Dont you baby?"she grins. Taking one of your erected buds in her mouth, sucking, nibbling on it.

A part of you enjoys it.

But most parts of you need to know what he fuck she said before..

"n-ahhyeon-", you try saying, "what do you mean with in my sleep-" you try silencing your moans. But damn is she good at this.

"Oh about that?" she smirks, leaving your nipple as she looks at you.

She gropes your tits with her hand as she smiles.

"I have been watching you in your sleep.. These cute pictures of you sleeping? I took them! They look amazing dont they?" she says so.. proudly?

"i-.. this is weird nayeon- you're perverted!" you say, trying to free yourself from the cloth that is tied to your hands.

"And what if i am?" she says, taking off your pants as well as your underwear.

"Your panties are so soaked.. you are enjoying this while calling me a perv??" she says smiling, her cold, long finger slowly circling your clit.

You whine a little. "No nayeon-" she continues circling your clit, slowly starting to rub it, with less and less softness.

"You want this. I know it.. or else you wouldnt react like this." she moves her finger to your face, showing you how its full of your slick.

"i-" you can feel yourself blush.

She shoves her fingers inside of your mouth, "suck." she demands you. You look at her weirdly, then slowly. You start to suck.

"Such a good girl for a perv." she whispers as she kisses your neck again, leaving marks here and there. You continue sucking on her fingers. The praise making you want this even more.

I mean a little pervertness cant hurt...?

She pulls out her fingers, and without even a warning, just shoves into your hole in a second.

You let out a louder moan.

She moves them fast, so eagerly.

"your moans sound better when you're awake.." she says, sucking on your nipple while her fingers are thrusting in and out of you.

Everything is overwhelming.

You start to sweat, your breaths are cut short. Your heart beats rapidly.

All because of Nayeon.

Already after some minutes, you feel yourself clench around nayeon fingers.

"Nayeon- i-"

"Cum for me princess." she interrupts you.

The princess sends you off as you cum onto her fingers, letting out a louder moan.

She slowly pulls her fingers out.

'Click' you look at nayeon, she took a picture???

"I should show this to her.." Nayeon says while smirking.

"Her?? What do you mean-" you ask, very confused.

"You will see." she says. Taking her clothes off.

"But now lets get back to us."

[ninapi]

Glitched

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Premise: Rintarou unexpectedly meets the girl of his dreams through an online game and he does his best to find this mysterious girl in the real world and keep her for good.

Word Count: 3289

Note: Hello, my beautiful dumplings. Welcome to my Suna miniseries, huhuhu. This will be a short story (4 chapters lol sorry, that’s my definition of short 🙃 sometimes I wonder how people write complete stories under 800 words, I just cant-), while I prepare for my new big series. Some high school drama, no multiple endings or routes just one~ Smooches for all of you.

Warning: Mild spoilers, if you’re up to date with the anime you’ll be just fine.

Chapter 1: Not so bad.

Suna Rintarou was by no means enjoying his second year of high school. Summer weather was definitely not his favorite, always tough on him, but the agony was even worse this year. He was tired, not just physically but mentally, the toll of dealing not only with his own sense of failure but also his teammates who were gravely disappointed of not being able to give their captain the satisfaction of going to the finals and bring victory to their school in his last year on the team.

It hasn’t been long since Inarizaki lost to Karasuno, which meant the practice schedule has increased not only in frequency but also in intensity. Days were very long and every single muscle in Suna’s body hurt. He was really looking forward to the holiday weekend, meaning he would have an extra day to rest.

His classmates were raving about this new online game that had recently come out and was very popular. They had plans to play together during the weekend and advance into one of the heaviest of dungeons before classes resumed, but their plan came to a sudden stop, the twins were being dragged by their mother into a family wedding across the country and they wouldn’t be able to join the team.

The boys were devastated, whining men heard all over the class. They were really counting on the Miya power to beat the hell out of the dungeon boss, help was needed desperately.

¨Hey Suna, I know you said you didn’t like the gameplay you watched the other day but can you please join our team? Without Osamu in our side we are doomed.¨ Suna heaved a deep sigh, collapsing on top of his desk. ¨Am I your last option? Can’t you find someone who really wants to play this? I’m so tired, I was planning on staying in bed all weekend.¨ Osamu pulled him back up, giving him a stern look, ¨Come on, help your mates. I wish I could stay and beat them up but there’s nothing we can do about it, it’s just for this weekend, we’ll be back for the next and continue where you left off.¨ he really didn’t want to do this, but if he didn’t agree to it they wouldn’t shut up until he did, ¨Fine, text me the link. I’ll be there after dinner.¨ the boys were smothering him with hugs and trying to kiss off his face in joy, making him grimace as he shook them all off and went back to sleep on his very comfy desk. The thought of finally resting this weekend turning into nothing but a sad memory.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆��.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

The guys added him to a group chat and everything was ready for the first quest. 

His sister tied his hair up at the front in a tiny ponytail so he would look like some of those cute game-streamers she watches, not caring if her brother needed it or not with his hairstyle. He was beyond annoyed with life in general, why do people not leave him alone, even his sister was now conspiring to destroy his peaceful long holiday weekend, ¨Curse those damn twins. It’s all their fault.¨ he was grumbling under his breath while putting his headset on and going in the game to create his character.

¨Alright guys, let’s go level up first, stay in this area and let’s meet up at the bottom of the hill when you reach level 20, then we’ll move in to the forest.¨ they all hummed in acknowledgement, breaking the group. Suna went off to chase some slimes and smaller monsters, hating his life every second of it, the game had a very cute looking art style and it was just not his jam at all. He found it hilarious though that the toughest guys in his class were all hunting cute rabbits and crying over it out loud and in their shared group chat space, so he made sure to screenshot some of those moments, posting them in his account and tagging all his playmates. He had to get something out of this torture, at least he could make fun of them for a while.

His character stopped moving and it turned into a pixel block, ¨Guys, is the game acting up or is it just mine?¨ he could only hear static coming through his headset and some of the guys were posting on the chat that the game kicked them out and they were rebooting their pc, so he just stayed there waiting for the rest to go back in. His character was still a bit glitchy but it was moving now. Then all of the sudden he heard a very loud screech pressed to his left ear, and he was positive that it was not human. ¨Oh my god, sausage! What are you doing to my poor headset? Leave it alone!!¨ saying he was confused was an understatement, all the players in his team were dudes, ¨Ehm, hi?¨ the line went quiet but he wasn’t hearing any more static, just some shuffling on the other side, ¨Who’s this?¨ you were sitting on your chair now, the fluff ball being kicked out of your room for good. ¨Uhm, Rintarou? How about you? Did the guys call you over? I didn’t hear anything about any girl joining our party.¨ Rintarou? What- you were just chatting with your girlfriends when your cat jumped on you and stole your headset, there was no Rintarou in that group, ¨I'm (Y/N). Are you Miyuki’s boyfriend?¨ Miyuki? Was there a Miyuki in his class? It was possible, not like he knows everybody but this was all so confusing, ¨Nope, definitely not that Rintarou. So you are not with the guys either? How did you get into the group? The game didn’t say someone new joined the party.¨ 

You were so confused, you could see your actual party on the screen and on the side chat but you couldn’t hear them talk, just this random guy, ¨Did your game get glitchy too? Maybe that’s how you ended up in my party.¨ he moved his character around, looking for you, but he was completely alone in the area, some of the guys still complaining about the game not letting them in through his phone. ¨Well, I mean yes. It did get glitchy but I can still see my girls playing on my screen, could it be just the audio that got crossed over somehow?¨ it was so weird, none of the girls even noticed your absence, you said you were having some troubles with your headset and so they just continued killing monsters, ¨Yeah, I don’t see you around me either, so I guess it’s just the audio getting messy. Hold on, Imma log out and see if that resets us back to normal.¨ you nodded even if he couldn’t see you. ¨Ugh, what the hell. The logout button is gone. How about you, do you see it?¨ you were checking everywhere in your screen, it was definitely not where it usually is, ¨It’s gone for me too. I bet it’s just still glitchy and will go back to normal in a bit, if it’s fine with you, we could just keep playing like this until the game fixes itself?¨ he was already back to killing slimes, way over level 20 by now and his classmates were still gone, ¨Yeah, fine with me.¨ 

Both of you continued doing your thing in complete silence, so much so that Suna forgot you were still there and started mumbling curses quietly, he was being targeted by larger monsters now and was still on his own, he didn’t know much about this game and he was loosing HP fast, ¨What’s wrong?¨ your soft voice startled him, his ears flushing bright red in embarrassment, ¨Sorry, I forgot you were still there. Just being attacked by inferno wolves, don’t know how to kill them, today is my first day playing this.¨ you chuckled quietly, he was kindda cute, those were very easy to kill lesser monsters, ¨Just jump on them and stomp hard.¨ he did as instructed, killing one instantly, ¨Oh wow that was easy, thanks. Are you like a guild master or something?¨ that made you smile, you were right, he was cute. ¨Nothing of the sort, just been playing this for longer. Let me know if you need more help, I know my fair share of tricks.¨ 

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆ﾟ.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

He was about to just ‘x’ out the game since the logout button was still gone, it was 9:30 and none of the guys were able to log back in, the game refusing to accept them, it was a waste of time, he didn’t even want to play this ridiculous game, the happy tune coming out of it was driving him insane at this point, that was until he heard your quiet giggles, it made him curious. They started soft, he almost thought he’d imagined it, but they grew louder each second and without realizing it, he was smiling, ¨What is it?¨ he wasn’t going to say anything but he just needed to know what was causing the cute fit of giggles on the other side, or he wasn’t going to be able to sleep in peace. ¨You heard that? Oh no, so embarrassing. Sorry, my cat, he is crazy you see. Earlier he was chewing on my headset so I kicked him out, but he got out of the house and got back into my room climbing all the way to the window, he’s like a ninja! And was nuzzling my tummy just now, I’m very ticklish.¨ was it normal for such a story to be this cute? Since when does he find cat ninjas cute? Why does he feel the need to tickle an unknown woman-

¨Was that sausage?¨ he chuckled evilly, wanting to continue the conversation, ¨Oh GOD, you heard that too? This game is like boycotting my life, I’m telling you. But yes, that’s sausage. He’s very heavy and of a brownish tone so he kindda looks like one, that’s why we named him that.¨ it’s not like he was interested in cats, but this was way better than killing blue pixel blobs, ¨It’s kay, I find names like that fun, I really don’t like when people name their pets, I don’t know Steve or something,¨ that caused you to laugh loud and clear, getting stabbed by a monster in the process, which made you just laugh even more, ¨Steve? What? Who would name their cat Steve?¨ you let your character bleed to death and were now hugging one of your pillows while sipping on some juice you had left, getting comfy on your chair. ¨Believe it or not, I’ve seen things, specially since I got in my current school volleyball team, there you see crazy, crazy stuff.¨ so he played volleyball…you’re nowhere near athletic but damn, he sounded like an interesting individual. The night was nothing like what you expected it to be, it was getting better every second.

Time surely flies when you’re actually having fun. He got some fruit jelly out and was chewing on it while speaking, needing some extra sugar to stay awake longer, ¨Are you eating fruit jelly?¨ he sits up right away, making sure his cam was actually off, ¨How do you know? Is this game livestreaming now or-?¨ you wished, ¨Hahaha no, it’s just that they make this sound, you know what I mean? Like when you suck the jelly out? I know I’m weird, I’m so sorry.¨ was he making sucking sounds just now? Why was he blushing? He didn’t know his favorite snack made suggestive sounds, well, that was embarrassing, he didn’t do that on purpose, ¨Ugh, well yeah you got me there, I’m eating fruit jelly. But I don’t think you’re that weird. Just a bit.¨ now you were the one blushing, it was fun talking to him, you've been talking about everything and nothing in particular at the same time for the last couple of hours and it was nearly midnight now. ¨Hey, is your game still glitchy? My chara is like dead now but still let’s me talk to you, I think there’s something really wrong with this game today.¨ his character was sitting down on a daisy field, enjoying his life as much as his owner, no monsters in sight, but the logout button was still not available, ¨Yeah, well I’m not dead, but things look the same, my mates were also complaining because the game kicked them out and didn’t let them back in.¨ he actually lied to his classmates and told them he was going to bed like twenty minutes ago but he just wasn’t capable of telling you how tired he actually was, ¨Hm, yeah I don’t think it’s going to let us sign out tonight, should we leave it open and just go to bed? It’s getting late and even if there’s no school tomorrow we should probably get going.¨ so you were in school too, your voice sounded right about his age but he didn’t know how to ask without sounding like a creepy old man, ¨Yeah I was thinking of going to bed too but sausage wouldn’t let us go.¨ us, huh? you smiled bashfully, playing with the headset cord, ¨Sausage is like that, I think he likes to hear your voice.¨ oh boy, was he smitten, he didn’t know much about you or what you looked like even but he wanted more of this, whatever that was, ¨Well then that means we gotta keep talking so he can hear it some more, maybe then he won’t eat your headset.¨ he could hear your giggles once more, they were creating a hole in his stomach, pretty sure it was eating itself out at your cuteness, he just wanted to continue hearing them, people never laughs at his comments, this was a first you actually thought he was funny, ¨We should. Do you think if we just don’t close the game it would stay like this? I mean like the audio and all…? Maybe we could talk some more tomorrow.¨ were you asking him on a date? That was a date, definitely. ¨Yeah I can do that, anything for sausage’s sake.¨ you were both grinning at the screen like idiots, not wanting to leave, ¨Then, since it’s the weekend how about we come back in the morning? Oh wait no, here in Miyagi the holidays are important, I gotta go to the shrine early, but how about after lunch?¨ he was so tired that even getting up by lunch time seemed like a task, but he would gladly lose sleep for this, ¨Yup, can do. See you tomorrow, sausage girl.¨ both of you left the pc on and went to bed, the smile on both of your faces causing your cheeks to hurt. 

He was cute, you’ve never had so much fun talking with a guy before, it all felt so natural like if you were talking with your best friend, like if you’ve known him since forever. You wondered if asking for his number would be too bold, he was funny and you just wanted to talk to him some more, maybe even meet him one day. Just thinking about it was making you feel giddy, your legs kicking on your bed as you squealed against your pillow, trying your best to quiet down your excitement and not wake your mother up.

Suna was on his bed thinking the very same thing, would it be weird to ask for your number? You were complete strangers, but that’s how people make friends, right? Not weird at all. He rarely had intentions of talking with any girl but talking to you tonight has been the highlight of his year and he wasn’t exaggerating. He didn’t even know he could laugh this much, Suna just couldn’t wait anymore, he was sure he wanted this to continue and with new resolution, he went to sleep, hoping noon would come fast, so he could ask for your number and maybe, hopefully, get to see you even if it was just through his phone, he just needed to put a face to this bubbly feeling inside his chest.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆ﾟ.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

When he woke up the following morning he noticed his pc was off, this causing him to go into panic mode, what happened? He made sure it would stay on all night-

¨MOOOOM, why is my pc off? Did you touch it?¨ he was pissed, anything but that, not the pc. ¨What? No I didn’t. I think we lost power for a bit earlier, your dad was trying to fix the oven and was messing with the power box.¨ that explains it but it wasn’t less aggravating, would he even be able to go in the game again or would he be kicked out like his mates.

He turned it back on as fast as he could, going in the game, but luck wasn’t on his side, two of his classmates were already in leveling up on his screen. He grabbed his headset and literally screamed on the mic, ¨(Y/N), please tell me you are there.¨ but he could hear very manly snorts on the other side, crushing his heart ¨Who’s (Y/N)? Your girlfriend, Suna?¨ he just couldn’t deal with them right now. He rebooted his pc in hopes of getting the line back up to yours, but when he did, he saw a notification pop up on his screen, ¨We apologize for all the troubles caused last night, as an apology, we’ve sent 100 diamonds and 2 HP refills into your inbox.¨ 

No, this couldn’t be happening. They fixed it overnight. He hadn’t ask you for your number yet, that’s what he was going to do as soon as he heard your beautiful voice.

You were fixing your make up, silly thing to do since he couldn’t even see you, but it was definitely a date. You got your headset on with a bright smile on your face as you saw your screen moving, the game still playing on the background, ¨Morning, Mr. Sausage. Got a nice sleep?¨ your friends were beyond shocked, ¨Mr.Sausage? (Y/N) are you talking to your cat again? I think you need to go out some more.¨ Miyuki? No, no, no, no, why??? Where was he? What happened? You didn’t turn the game off, he should still be there! ¨Yeah…did they fix the game? I can hear you guys just fine now.¨ you were seriously hoping he was just late and would jump in the conversation any second now, ¨Mhm, they gave us some dias, check your inbox. You can buy the sword you wanted with that!¨ Stupid sword, you didn’t want it anymore, not if that meant not being able to talk to him again. ¨Sorry guys, I…I’m login out for the day.¨ without another word you just closed your laptop and collapsed face first onto your bed, life sucked.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆ﾟ.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

Tuesday couldn’t come faster for Suna, he just ran over to the class next door almost clashing with the wall, ¨ATSUMU! I need your help.¨ the eldest twin glared at him with intensity, couldn’t he see what time was it? Why would someone ask for a favor so early in the morning ? He was barely awake after getting up at four to jog. ¨Tell me later, maybe during lunch break when I can actually listen to you.¨

He threw his bag on the floor and went over to the tired setter, shaking him lightly, ¨Please, only you can help me.¨ what could be this important? He looked over at the middle blocker giving him a dirty angry look, but he was sporting a not so fashionable pair of bags under his eyes, even his skin tone was a bit off, was he not supposed to rest for three days? This made him reconsider his actions, ¨What is it? Stop shaking me, dammit!¨ he sat down on the chair in front of his desk, serious mode on, ¨You have the phone number of the Karasuno setter right?¨ huh? this was definitely not worth the while, he went back to sleep on his desk, ¨Atsumu please! I need you to ask him something, please I’ll beg if you want me to.¨ he’s never seen him this desperate, ¨kay, I think I do, yeah he should be on the group chat. What do you need from him?¨ he was pulling out his phone, ready to rely the message and hopefully go back to sleep, ¨Can you ask him if he knows a girl named (Y/N)¨ a girl? This was unexpectedly interesting. ¨(Y/N) what? Is she from Karasuno?¨ he was punching the message out, waiting on the details, ¨Well I don’t know, all I know is her first name and that she lives in Miyagi, she goes to school there and is possibly around our age.¨ Atsumu couldn’t believe what he was hearing, talk about dumb teammates, ¨You do know Miyagi is a prefecture, right? Not a city. How many schools are there even in Miyagi? Why would Tobio-kun know her? You are being stupid, Suna.¨ he was deleting the message, shaking his head, ¨No, no, please just ask him. I know he probably won’t know her but is my only chance, please. I won’t bother you again if he says he doesn’t know…¨ the setter sighed, sending the ambiguous message out, this was really silly, but he could see how desperate his friend was, and he just wouldn’t let him sleep ever if he didn’t comply. 

To their surprise, Kageyama replied almost immediately, ¨I don’t, but I’ll ask around.¨ Atsumu showed him his screen and the small smile that painted his features left the setter breathless, so he can smile-

¨Thanks, please let me know if he says anything else.¨ he would find you, no matter what.

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Tagged babes: @dazaisfavgf

Masterlist Next Chapter

[leaves-unfurling]

doin this on my (uttos) alterhuman alt! and ty for the tag! 🫶/p

🌈 im not entirely sure! I know im some sort of plant + a cryptidkin of a plant golem, but its honestly the hardest differentiating the two since theyre so similar to me. Plus being a little voidpunk also really ties into it for me.

🌌 mine was about two months ago. I just kinda had alot of time to think and went “waittt… thats not really a sona… thats a self portrait-“ i was really confused since i had my awakening before i really knew anything like termonology. Though ive always been like this and have always kindof mentally compared myself to the plants and nature around me.

👾 my plant type is real, my cryptidkin isnt (as far as we know lol)

🧷id say psychological/mental

💚 im a christian, tho obv no hate to anyone that has spiritual beliefs tied to their alterhumanity. I try not to think to hard abt it tbh, sometimes i just feel like a plant, or a mysterious creechur. I dont get too deep on it in relation to my beliefs.

⚧️i dont really think either have a gender in the same way that humans do. I mean ones a plant and the others a plant-like thing. I dont think either of them have a gender identity outside of just purely existing

🧤nope no gear! I dont think theres really anything out their for my type of alterhumanity anyways tbh.

🏳️‍🌈 yup! Transmasc, bi and proud!

🌚 i dunno tbh stuff for my kintypes isnt really easily noticeable if it happens at all. I dont get phantomshifts but Sometimes my mindset does change a bit where i want to just kinda sit outside or dissapear into nature for a while, but that can also just be attributed to me being a very nature oriented person. But whos to say that my personality and my kintype cant influence eachother. Maybe im like this because of my kintypes and im just noticing it more now?

🌝 it doesnt really affect me too much as far as im aware. Im just cosplaying as a human person most of the time anyways. I just kindof look internally, realize the shape of my soul in a sense, and then go about my day 🫶

💊 my types are pretty contradicting, my plantkin side loves the sun and daylight and rain, but my cryptidkin type reallllyyy prefers nightime and the moon, soooo my sleep schedules a mess.

🤖 as above, kinda only had a name for what i am recently, but ive always had the same mental feelings and ideas since i was really young.

🍁 hard to say, i feel like its always been there but leaning more into my interests in flora and fauna, ive kindof grown a bit now that i have the words and ideas to understand.

🧸 not really? The way my types eat arent a way i can eat (kinda really cant photosynthesize- trust me ive tried lol) so i just eat whatever in a sense. i also dont really feel guilty eating plants if that makes sense. Same way most non vegetarians dont feel guilty about eating mammals.

🛍️ i dont really think so :’) theres one or two people i met through the community that id like to consider friends but im not sure if they would consider me the same! Id like to be friends tho!

🍂 definitely dense forests!

😸 nope! I dont consider my cryptidkin an animal at all, more like a sapient plant. And ofc my plantkins a plant and just not an animal lol

sorry i dont have anyone i would tag that isnt already a part of the chain 😭🫶

Alex's alterhuman ask game!

Reblog this post to let others ask you question(s)!

I tried to make this accesible to all alterhumans.

🌈 - how many _types do you have?

🌌 - when was your awakening?

👾 - is your _type real or fictional?

👽 - do you enjoy being a […] (therian, otherkin, ect. Just put your label here)

🧷 - what's the reason of your identity? You can say that you don't know. (Ex. "My theriantrophy is spiritual)

💚 - what are your beliefs? Does it affect your identity?

⚧️ - does your _type have a different gender/sex than you? Do you even know your _type's gender?

🧤 - do you own any gear? If yes, what is it?

🏳️‍🌈 - are you also a part of the LGBT+ community?

🌚 - do you experience shifts? If yes, what kind of shifts do you experience most often?

🌝 - how does your identity affect your everyday life?

💊 - is your _type more nocturnal or does it prefer daytime?

🤖 - for how long do you know about your identity?

🍁 - do you think that you were born with your identity or has it "started" during your life?

🧸 - does your _type affect your diet?

🛍️ - do you have alterhuman friends? If yes, in real life or in the internet?

🍂 - what is your _type's natural territory/home?

😺 - is your _type an animal?

That's all byeeee :3

[girlindelusionn]

finally finished himym!! hated the finale (of course) so here's another "most likely to" but much longer to help me cope (negate, why lie to you) with how the most awesome couple ended

(also this probably has a million mistakes but im too lazy to do something about it, having to write in english is hard man, so please ignore it:D)

most likely to: swarkles version :)

Who spends almost all their money on the other?

barney, definitely. he's not exactly the best at actually coming up with gifts so sometimes for birthdays or stuff like that he just takes her to the mall and lets her pick whatever she wants (he also makes fun of her the whole time, but i don't think it's necessary to clarify that)

Which one drives the car and which one gives them directions?

barney doesn't know how to drive and is generally better with technology, so robin drives and he gives directions and prevents her fights with the gps to get really violent

also robin is a REALLY violent driver, she doesn't go really fast but if anyone has the audacity to get in her way shes going to definitely roast the fuck out of them

"oh i know you're not honking at me… LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT, IM GOING TO MAKE THE TURN WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? YOU WANT ME TO FLY OVER YOU? GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS AND LET ME GET IN THE FUCKING L– there you go, thanks!..."

Which one gives the other a piggyback ride when they're tired?

barney to robin, one of the "corny couple" million things he swore he wasn't going to do. but then robin simply looks at him with a sad face, explaining how much her feet hurt and he can't say no

Who is the most affectionate?

barney, actually

it's surprising, cause he's always been someone who likes his space but there's times, mostly in private, when he just can't keep his hands to himself. and you would think it's purely sexual but no, in the contrary, most times it's just a hand in her hair or her back, or demanding hugs and cuddles

Who falls asleep in the other's lap and who carries them to bed?

trick question! barney is who carries robin to bed, but she falls asleep in his shoulder

and he is the one who falls asleep in robin's lap, with her running her hands through his hair

Who wakes up first?

neither of them is a morning person, but usually robin works out in mornings so her. on weekends they stay in bed as long as they can

Who apologizes first after an argument?

they're both stubborn as hell so they schedule apologizes and take turns on doing it

Who is the nerd?

both of them, in different aspects. like robin likes math to the point of doing problems and equations for fun ??? and well, barney is a huge star wars, lord of the rings, that kinda books, nerd

i like to think that they have harry potter in common, they've read all the books, make marathons with the movies, they even went to the universal park! and had a lot of fun there (of course they've never told the guys that)

Who makes the other one laugh the most?

barney, he knows robin cant be mad and laughing at the same time and he uses it as an advantage

Who sleep talks?

robin 🥺

Who hogs the blankets at night?

also robin, but barney doesn't care

Who is the neat freak?

neither of them, but they manage to keep the place decent

Who likes to surprise the other with random gifts?

barney! single flowers, tiny chocolates, etc

Who buys the healthy food in the house?

robin, but it's mostly barney who does the actual cooking

Who has better music taste?

robin 😎

Who takes care of the spiders?

they do it together as a team, and if that doesn't work (aka if the spider is slightly bigger than average) they just go whining to marshall and he fixes it

Who uses more nicknames?

barney is mostly sweetie but after the wedding robin is kinda obsessed with the word husband

"so how's the most handsome husband, huh?"

"did you buyed the milk I texted you for, husband?"

"hi, husband!!"

robin is babe or sometimes honey, and after the wedding barney keeps calling her his "ex-girlfriend" (don't tell anyone, but he also LOVES the term wife, he can't comprehend how is he so lucky to have her as his wife)

(update after actually finishing the show: r-train and b-nasty!!!)

Who's the little spoon?

first year of dating? robin

after that is barney, you can't change my mind

Who suggests scary movies for film night?

robin!! but they both like them

Who gets jealous more often?

both, barney is less dissimulated about it

Who brings up kids first?

no of them, lol

Who borrows who's clothes more?

robin, she has stole the few hoodies he had and sometimes for sexy times likes using his ties

barney secretly uses some of her giganteus t shirts (he makes fun of her for buying them but he's actually glad she does) for sleep when she's away for the night

...they smell like her, okay? leave him alone

(also he loves when she uses his underwear and sometimes the only way to convince her to do it is doing the same himself, so he has wore panties)

(don't tell ted)

(please)

Who cries more during sad movies?

barney, is hard for robin to cry for movies, also he loves villains and they hardly have a happy ending so...

Who falls asleep on the other more?

robin, she falls asleep very easily

Who says I love you more?

barney :)

Who initiates kisses more?

also blondie, again he's a little obsessed with his wife

Who initiates hugs more?

robin this time

Who takes more pictures of the other?

robin, for sure. at first it was cause she wanted that bad picture of him, but then his husband is really cute with his sleepy eyes and the sun on his face, or looks so excited to watch the next episode of some lame show, or he's bringing her breakfast at bed with a big smile or looks a little too good with his new suit and she can't help but take her phone out and snap a pic of him

Who leaves notes for the other one around the house?

barney, at first it was to annoy her, like writing "you lost the game!!" at random places (i'm sorry lmao, i just realized i made you lose too, lol) or "sorry, babe! i ate it all last night" at the empty wrappers of candy in the fridge

but then one day barney found one in a coffee mug:

"wow, you didn't put much imagination in hiding this one, didn't you?" he said, his girlfriend was in the bedroom finishing to get ready for work.

"read it!!" she shot back, a little… nervous?

"i love you", the note said.

"scherbatsky?"

"yeah...?"

"come here"

"what's up?" she finally showed up to the living room, looking all tiny and scared

"love you too, loser"

Who gets drunk faster?

barney? i don't know, they both handle scotch pretty well, so i'm guessing it takes a while for them to get drunk

Who gets hit on more by strangers?

robin, but she couldn't care less

Who makes food for the house more often?

barney, he's a surprisingly good cook

[demon-that-slayed]

alright hello I'm already gonna warn you, this'll be long. btw, thank you sm for doing it, I'm really hyped! you're gonna do amazing, I know that, so do ti as you wish, full creative freedom. (btw, I'm gonna copypaste this because I've already written it once, hopefully that's alright with you)

okay! so. starting with me ig. i dont even know how to begin.

im listening to music atm. i always do - people that dont always listen to some music are kinda psychopaths if you ask me. like, if im not listening to music, i'll be listening to an audiobook or a podcast or be watching some video or netflix. i cant not do anything. i say i love reading, but the last time i read a book has been weeks ago. i just have reading slumps sometimes. not saying that i dont read regularly - god, no. i'll find enough fanfics and oneshots and shit to count for a book. but most of the time i can spare, i try to write. and at the moment, im really doing good! i write drabbles almost daily, and i try to finish a chapter for my actual wip bi-weekly. which... i gotta admit doesnt work all the time but im trying! im just a shit ton of a procrastinator. like, sometimes it physically hurts telling myself i need to do something but not being able to get up and actually do it. i kinda zone out a lot too when im forced to sit through something boring or just when i cant listen to music/watch something at the same time. i fidget a lot, too. so basically as you can see im always doing something, always have something going on inside my head, am quite loud. like, literally, im the loudest person i know, except for maybe my dad, and im really expressive. could be italian with how much i gesture.

for my hobbies, well, ive told you about some of them so far. im not really... sporty. in the slightest. and i dont like sports either. but the one thing i do indeed like is badminton, which i do somewhat regularly. i think i'd suck at quidditch, but, unlike football, i do believe i'd be interested in watching. also i just really want to fly a broom - like, if i could pick any animal to be, i'd be a bird. always would have said so in the past too. maybe a cat, just because i really love them, and am planning to get one as soon as i get my own apartment. i'll take one from the shelter, i think, and if i could pick it'd be a black one so i can call it toothless. i do have a dog right now tho, or rather my family does. i love her, but she's not as cuddly as i'd like her to be, which, i mean, is fine im trying my best not to step over her boundaries, but then again my love language most certainly is physical touch, so my favourite moments with her are when she just allows me to cuddle her in front of the fireplace. its kind of a tradition at this point when theres fire in there. what else is there to say?

ive said quite much already but i feel like im still missing some.

i guess im really insecure of some things. dont get me wrong, i know my strengths, and i fucking love correcting people, my ego is over the moon sometimes. im stubborn and i hate being wrong and i know that im obnoxious when i discuss, just because i cannot stop discussing if theres still something to discuss. but im trying to better, really. some of it at least. still, i am in fact really insecure it seems. i worry so much what people might think of me - i cant present anything to anyone other than my closest family or friends because my voice will start to shake and i will start to sound like im gonna cry. on the topic of that, i cry so so easily. its horrible, really. plus, i have huge anxiety and i get panic attacks regularly, which kinda fucks with my sleeping schedule because they always happen when i go to bed.

okay, but enough with the depressive shit, im not done talking about myself yet. if you let me talk about myself i can and i will write paragraphs. really, dont worry putting all of this into your response. just think of it as me being super happy youre doing this because, honestly, genuinely, i am.

but getting on with it. when im excited, im kinda... like a child, in a way. like i let out unnecessarily high pitched screams and i cant stop laughing when ive started, and i clap my hand in front of my mouth or shake my arms out. im just really, really emotional tbh.

my favourite feeling is melancholy though. its... beautiful, in a very terrifying way. its the kind of feeling you get when you think about your childhood, or old friends, or family members you dont see anymore. its a feeling but its so much more and - i dont know. i dont know how it couldnt be my favourite.

i love sunrises and sunsets and i love the sun in general. im a summer person, partly because im always really cold (my circulation in my hands and my feet is fucked lmao, plus my blood ran low on iron for a while) but like, its summer, i dont get how it cant be people's favourite. plus, my birthday is in june, and my birthday is my favourite holiday. with christmas following.

okay i match you with…

REMUSSS

okay so be warned this is a very bad description but i think you guys would be great with eachother like these are very random things sos I’ll make a list :

(these are like headcanons if that’s fine)

okay so at night when you can’t sleep, he’ll just like cuddle you and make sure you’re fine, and you would make him happy just being there I guess, yk

anyways you two would like bond on liking music and what books you like and you always would have like mini arguments which end in him sarcastically admitting youre right which makes you feel good even if it’s not bc atleast you are right about this song being better or this character being more beil. than the other.

in summer and winter you always dragged him out for the sunrise/sunset and like he would jokingly complain sometimes because he would melt in the heat because it was always cold in the dorms and he had his sweater on

in the winter though you would steal lots of his sweaters and wear them piled on top of eachother because you froze in the cold

also when the full moon was near you’d always like be there and make sure he’s okay and you’d be like there for eachother all the time and like

he would sarcastically/jokingly be annoyed at you but actually really enjoy being around you, especially before you guys date.

oh yeah and you have picture albums filled with pictures that you, remus, or someone else takes that fill the albums

anyways, i hope this was good, ive never done this before lmao

[adrianasunderworld]

Something in your Aura

Raihans female!reader

Tired. He was so very tired. Raihan had a packed schedule most of the day. From a photoshoot in the early morning, a training session with his gyms trainers, and then overlooking some documents in the archives. By the time he left the vault, the sun was starting to set. He was ready to sleep, eat, and shower, not necessarily in that order.

    But it seemed the day was not over yet. As he walked down the street, Raihan heard what sounded like a pokemon cry. It was small yelping noise that gradually got closer and closer to him. Looking behind him, Raihan was greeted with the sight of the tiniest Rioulu he had ever seen come bounding up to him. The little one stopped in front of him, tilting its head up and staring curiously.

    Raihan knelt down at the little pokemons level and held out a hand for them to sniff. "Where did you come from?" 

   "Riii" it replied, putting its little black paws on his hand. "Rii rio!" Whatever the little one wanted, it seemed happy.

   While it was content, Raihan looked over the young pokemon. The Riolu looked clean and well fed. It had a little red ribbon tied around its neck like a scarf. At the end it had a name embroidered on the end in gold thread. Gently taking hold of the end of the ribbon, it said Aaron. 

    "Aaron? Is that your name?" Raihan asked the Riolu.

    "Ri!" Aaron nodded.

    "Where's your trainer then?" It was obvious the little pokemon wasn't one of the wild strays that wandered the streets. They clearly had a trainer that took care of them, and were probably very worried. Raihan picked up the small pokemon and stood. "How about we go find them?"

    "Riolu." Aaron nodded and happily perched himself on Raihans shoulder. It seemed the best idea was to go in the direction Aaron had come from. But as they wandered down the street, Raihan didn't see anyone who looked worried or was searching for something, and Aaron did not seem to respond to any of the people passing. He had stopped a couple of people to ask them, but all shook their heads and did not recognize the baby pokemon. 

     It was starting to get late, and at this point Raihan was starving. Aaron began to yawn from his seat on his shoulder. It did not look like they were going to find Aarons trainer tonight. So, without many options, Raihan bought himself some dinner and took his new friend home. 

     "Hey Rotom," he said, and his phone came flying out, the pokemon ready to snap pictures. "Lets get word to out about our little friend here." Rotom pointed the camera at him and started to record. "Hey everyone, listen, if anyone is in Hammerlocke and missing a Rioulu,  I've found him. He's safe. Say hi Aaron."

   "Ri!" He waved to the camera, Rotom being certain to get a good shot of him.

   "Please, if you are his trainer,or know his trainer. Message me and I will get back  to you as soon as possible. Good night." After posting the video and a clear picture of Aaron for good measure, Raihan settled down for the night as he waited for any responses. Meanwhile, the young Riolu seemed to finally grasp that it was no longer home. The cheerful little guy had curled up quietly in Raihans lap, looking a little sad. 

   Raihan scratched him behind the ear. "Miss your trainer?" 

   "Riii…." the baby pokemon nodded sadly. 

   "Don't worry, we'll find them." Raihan assured and let Aaron curl up on his chest that night to sleep.

    The next day, Raihans phone had blown up with notifications. Most of them were comments about how cute Aaron was and well wishes in finding his trainer. most of the private messages that had been sent were of people claiming to be his trainer, but most came off as shady at best. Raihan contemplated going down to the Pokemon center to see if anyone had reported Aaron missing, when he got another message. This one was from a girl, it said her name was __.

   Raihan opened the message and read it.

    Hi, my friend showed me your post about the Riolu you found last night. I'm his trainer, he ran off last night and was no where to be found. I've been worried sick. Please let me know when I can come get him.

    Out of curiosity, Raihan looked at her profile. It didn't take long at all to see a picture of Aaron, ribbon and all, curled up with a Lucario. Then another picture of him being held by the girl, both looking very happy. Raihan showed Aaron the picture and the little one pawed at the screen, crying out for her as if he could reach through the screen to get to her. That seemed to settle it.

     Raihan took one more look at the photo. "Why didn't you tell me your trainer was cute?" 

     "Ri?"

     He chuckled to himself as he messaged the girl back. Noon in Hammerlockes gym lobby sound good?

It only took a minute for her response. 

See you there.

    Sitting in the lobby, Raihan watched as Aaron played on the floor, Flygon had taken it upon themself to entertain the young one by letting him tackle their tail. Just as it was about to be noon, Raihan heard a girls voice from the entrance.

    "Aaron? Aaron!" 

    The Rioulu sprang up and happily ran towards his trainer. She scooped him and hugged him, Raihan could see her relax by the moment. Any worry immediately melting away from her face. 

   "Riri!" Aaron cried out and pointed his paw towards Raihan. 

    The girl looked over and walked towards him. She smiled. "I cant thank you enough for finding him."

    Raihan waved it off. "Dont worry about it, I'm just glad the little guy is back where he belongs." 

     She sighed in relief. "You don't know the panic attack I went through last night." 

    "I can imagine," he said. "What happened anyway? How did you two get separated?"

    "We were walking home after training in the wild area, when he just ran off." She said. "My Lucario did his best to track him down, but he got lost so fast we couldn't find him. I searched everywhere but no luck. Then my friend sent me that post you made and I messaged you as soon as possible." Then she paused. "How did you find him anyway?"

     "He just ran up to me." Raihan said, unsure of how to explain. "I don't know.He seemed so happy, like he was looking for me or something. "

      ___ nodded thoughtfully. "Hhmm…"

      "What do you mean hhmm?"

      "Well…" she paused as if collecting her thoughts before continuing. "I think… maybe it's something about your aura."

     "My aura?"

      ___ nodded. "Yeah… I mean. How familiar are you with the Lucario line?"

     Raihan shrugged. He didn't get to fight many Lucario. Though he was vaguely aware of their unique abilities. "I know they're the aura pokemon. I've read a bit about that stuff, but I can't say I know much."

    She nodded. "Okay, well, to make a long story short, aura is this energy that all living things have. And the Lucario line are unique in that that they are able to sense and use auras energy. I think maybe Aaron sensed your aura and went looking for you."

    Raihan couldn't help but chuckle at the idea. It was certainly an interesting theory. "What could possibly be so attractive about my aura that he would come running?"

     ___ looked him at and down, a coy grin in her face. "It doesn't seem that far fetched. You have a very good aura."

    "You say it as if you can see it."

     Her face went red and she looked away in embarrassment."....I-I can…"

     "Oh," Raihan didn't mean to make her feel embarrassed. Though now he was genuinely curious. "That's pretty damn cool."

      She turned back to him, Aaron seemed to sense whatever it was she was feeling and looked at her curiously. "Thanks, um...but yeah. I guess he could just sense you were a good person and wanted to meet you." she smiled awkwardly.

    Raihan grinned back and reached out to scratch Aaron behind the ear. "Well I was glad to meet him."

      Aaron seemed very happy about it too. But his mood quickly changed when ___ said, "Thanks again for finding him. Come on, Aaron, let's go home." The Riolu started to squirm and cry out. He kept reaching out to Raihan like he didn't want to leave. __ seemed equally distressed. "Aaron, what's wrong? What's gotten into you? Dont you want to see Riley?"

     Aaron only kept pointing at Raihan and looked as if he was begging not to leave. Until eventually, he jumped out of her arms and ran to Raihan wrapping his little arms around his leg and nuzzling him.

     "Oh no." He and ___ said in unison.

     Raihan treated them to ice cream and they sat on a bench, unsure of what to do. Aaron sat between them, swinging his little legs as he munched on his snack. Not caring about the trouble he had caused. Her Lucario, Riley, sat on the ground, arms crossed. Looking at Aaron as the disapproving parent he was. 

     She still seemed so quiet and embarrassed about this whole ordeal. So Raihan did his best to break the ice in an attempt to make her more comfortable. "Riley and Aaron are certainly interesting names for pokemon."

     __ looked at him shyly and grinned a little while her Lucario turned its gaze to him. "I guess so. But in my defense, Riley is named after an old friend. The one who gave me his egg in the first place." 

     "I take it that Riley taught you about Auras?" She nodded. "And what about this one?" He pointed at Aaron.

     "This one is named after Sir Aaron. Another Aura user. One of the few recorded ones in history. Definitely the most famous by far."

     Something about that name struck a cord with him. "I've heard of that guy. Stopped a war and saved the tree of beginning, that Sir Aaron?"

     ___ nodded. "The one and only. So you do know a bit about Auras." She said teasingly.

     Raihan shrugged. "We have a few documents on aura users in the vault. Some of them mentioned the guy. But that's the extent of my knowledge." He paused for a moment before adding. "You seem to know a lot though."

     "A fair amount." She replied, taking another lick from the cone in her hand before it started dripping. "Why, is there something you want to know?"

    "I'm a historian by nature, I always want to know." He then winked before adding, "especially when the source is so cute."

     __ blushed before snorting and rolling her eyes. "That has to be the lamest line I've ever heard."

    Raihan laughed. "Can't blame a guy for trying. But there is one thing I am curious about."

    "And what's that?"

    "What is my aura like?" __ looked surprised. "What's with the face? You can't just say I have such a good aura that your pokemon come running and not tell me what's so great about it."

     ___ shook it off. "Sorry, it's just that I don't get asked that a lot. I dont really go around telling people I see auras."

     "Really?"

     "Yeah…" she let out an irritated sigh as she relayed how annoying it could be. "Whenever i talk about Auras most people either think I'm going to talk about the healing properties of crystals and oils next, or think I'm going to read their auras for free and act like it's some kind of fortune telling. Needless to say I dont bring it up often."

     "Oh Arceus, that does sound annoying."

     ___ laughed and took another lick of her ice cream before turning towards him, resting her arm on the back of the bench. "But since you asked nicely…" she paused for what felt like forever, looking him up and down with a scrutinizing gaze. Raihan had never felt more exposed then in that moment. Though oddly enough, he found that he did not mind. "Your Aura is strong and vibrant. That much is certain. It's… warm and kind. Yet sturdy. The essence of a protector. If that makes any sense. No wonder Aaron ran to you. He knew he would be safe by your side." Then her lips tilted slightly in a smirk. "You're aura is friend shaped."

     For some reason that made Raihan bust out laughing. "Do I get to be your friend then?" 

     She smiled, "I'd like that very much."

[ace-in-a-shopping-cart]

Day 7

Prompt:  There is a string tied around your pinky the end of which leads to your soulmate.

Word Count: 2,647

Main Taglist: (Send an ask to be added or removed!) @starlocked01,​​​ @spoopy-turtle,​​​ @lizluvscupcakes,​​ @more-fandon-than-friends​, @i-cant-find-a-good-username, @vindicatedvirgil, @star-crossed-shipper, @justaqueercactus, @gayboopnoodle, @sanderssidesweirdo, @the-sympathetic-villain, @8-writes Soulmate taglist:(Send an ask to be added or removed!) @elizabutgayer, @melodiread, @tsshipmonth2020, @mikalya12, @8-writes

Note: I modified the prompt a bit. In this world, everyone can see the string tied around the finger. When the string is intact, it’s red like normal. If the string has been cut, it will turn gray and both soulmates will be seen as ‘lesser people’ for denying their destiny. If a soulmate dies, the string will turn black. Another thing to note is that Logan is asexual. It’s briefly alluded to in the beginning but not brought up again.

Virgil wandered the campus, shoulders hunched in a clear indication that he didn’t want to be seen. He was glad to be able to be here at all after what happened in high school. Even so, he made sure to wear the gloves and stay out of people’s ways. The first semester was hell as he still wasn’t sure how to do anything but still tried. It seemed all his teachers had it out for him on day one as soon as they caught sight of those gloves.

It wasn’t until his second semester that he met someone who wore gloves just like him. He was sitting by himself during the time he’d scheduled for lunch, reading a fanfiction off his phone and trying to block out the world. Someone sat beside him and started watching a nature documentary while eating. He glanced over and frowned in confusion. Before he could gather his things to move to a different seat, the person spoke.

“I see you’re just like me.”

Virgil’s frown deepened. “How is that?”

They held up a gloved hand. “How did yours happen?”

Virgil relaxed into his seat. “I don’t know. I was in the middle of math class in high school.”

They winced, nodding. “That’s tough.”

“You?” Virgil didn’t know why, but he felt a burning need to know their story, to know he wasn’t alone in his struggles.

Their wince turned sour, a look one step away from a glare entering their eyes. “I cut it myself. She wasn’t willing to treat me right, didn’t accept my pronouns and sexuality, so I cut it. I know my worth and she didn’t deserve me. As far as I care, she still doesn’t.”

Virgil nodded, almost in awe of them. “I never met mine but they’ve stayed with me for a while now. I’ve always wondered if I was ever going to be good enough for someone or if I was simply too damaged.” He had no idea why he was telling a random stranger his life’s story but it felt too right to stop.

The stranger shook their head. “They cut it, you didn’t. It’s their fault but you’ve had to live with it. That shouldn't have been the case.” They turned to look at him, a fierce expression in their eyes. “If they didn’t want you, they didn’t deserve you, simple as that. You never got to know them or be known by them, thus it is their fault for cutting it. Never blame yourself for the actions of others.”

With that, they put their headphones back in and played their documentary. Virgil felt his phone buzz and looked down to find that he had ten minutes to get to class. He hastily ripped out a paper from his notebook, scrawled his number on it, shoved it over to the stranger, and ran off to get to class.

He didn’t see the stranger again for a few days but got a text from them that night. They chatted late into the night, talking about classes and life outside of soulmates. They commiserated over their lack of soulmates and the shunning it causes. Virgil was able to complain about his gloves and how much he hated them and have someone agree and understand, something he’d never had before. He was able to understand when the stranger, Logan, complained about the stares they got while washing their hands, how they hated everyone looking at the gray string that hung limply from their finger.

Virgil soon found not only a soulmateless companion, but a companion in academic pursuits as well. They seemed to be intellectual peers so Virgil understood most of Logan’s science babble. Logan seemed to have taken a biologist major as they spoke of creatures found in rainforests constantly. Virgil, on the other hand, was in an arts major, focusing mainly on building models of commissioned structures.

Slowly, brick by brick, Logan rebuilt Virgil’s self confidence. They helped him regain his self love, told him how strong he was for surviving the most grueling years of his life. Logan would never let Virgil apologize for the simple things like running late or using the wrong pronouns for them. They always made sure to let him know that they were not upset and were proud of his progress. Virgil’s sense of self worth grew stronger and larger, finally allowing him to see what Logan had known from the start: Virgil’s soulmate didn’t deserve him.

Over the semester, they grew closer, their bond growing strong. Virgil’s panic attacks lessened, he could stand to hear the word ‘soulmates’ without wanting to curl into a ball and cry, he didn’t jump at the sight of a math textbook, didn’t feel the need to hide his high school passions. He grew enough that he could look at the gloves he had to wear with something other than disdain.

Soon, they had decided to room together the next semester. Luckily, their requests were easily approved as it seemed the faculty were more than happy to have the two students without soulmates room together.

They finished their degrees and managed to graduate without dying, which Virgil counted as a plus. Logan simply said Virgil was being overdramatic. Once they graduated, they found an aquarium with a rainforest section that allowed Logan to work with the animals they loved and gave Virgil a lot of opportunities to make or upgrade different terrariums and enclosures. He was also able to design more enrichment activities for certain animals. They saw each other in the back rooms and in the halls. Most times, they ended up sitting with each other to eat lunch as not many people wanted to interact with them.They still lived together in a small apartment as they didn’t feel the need to move.

Over time, Virgil got to know Logan better and knew he was falling for them. One night, he’d accidentally had too much to drink. He leaned against Logan, who’s arm around his waist was the only thing keeping him upright and relatively stable. Logan deposited him on the couch. “Stay here, I’ll go grab you some water to sober you up.”

Virgil whined, reaching out for them. Once he took hold of their hand, he pulled his roommate close. “No! Don’t go!”

Logan sighed but sat down on the couch anyways. Virgil leaned heavily to the side but before Logan could catch him, his head landed in the other’s lap. Virgil wiggled a bit before he managed to throw his legs over the arm of the couch, fully laying down now. He giggled, looking up at Logan. “You’re really handsome.” He muttered.

Logan smiled fondly, a hand reaching out to stroke through Virgil’s hair. “That’s nice, Virge. How about you try to sleep now?”

Virgil shook his head. “No, no sleep. You’re too nice to me.”

Logan’s smile turned into a frown. “How am I too nice to you?”

“You’re very patient with me, never getting angry at me for jumping at small noises, or randomly leaving a room. You take such good care of me when I’m sick. You’ve treated me with more basic human kindness than most people did during college.” Tears started to slide down his temples but Logan brushed them away. “I love you, L.” Virgil curled up, his face pressed against Logan’s stomach.

Logan stayed still the rest of the night, eventually falling asleep. When they woke, Virgil was moving around in the kitchen. “Sorry, did I wake you?” He asked genuinely.

Logan groaned but shook their head as they stood. “No, but I think we need to talk about last night.”

Virgil nodded, turning the burner off so he didn’t burn the scrambled eggs. “Is this about my drinking? I promise that was a one time thing.”

“No, I trust you on that. I’m talking about what you said to me before you fell asleep.”

Virgil nodded again, shakier this time. He put the dish towel he was holding down. “Oh, that.”

Logan nodded. “I only really have one question for you.”

Virgil looked at the counter, pretending to wipe at the already clean surface. “Sure, shoot.”

Logan put a hand on his arm, staying his movement. “Did you mean it?”

Virgil’s head shot up so fast he was sure he popped something. “Of course!”

Logan smiled, leaning over to kiss Virgil’s cheek. “Good, because I love you too.”

Virgil stood there, dazed, for a few minutes while Logan walked away to shower and get ready for the day. When they came back out, they had a discussion of what their relationship was and decided that they were datemates.

As time went on, they stopped sleeping in separate rooms for one reason or another. Sometimes, one of them couldn’t handle the pressure of the world anymore and ended up crying themselves to sleep on the other’s bed, sometimes they were cuddling and talking before falling asleep. Eventually, they simply decided to share a room. With their combined savings, they toured apartments and found one they liked, with a bedroom they could both make theirs.

A few more years went by and they were happy. When around Logan, Virgil could almost forget about the grey string tied to his finger, the string that decreed he was unlovable, unable to marry, unable to adopt. The string and all implications that came with it ceased to exist the moment he caught sight of Logan.

It was in one of those moments that he knew: he wanted to marry this beautiful human beside him, the one holding him close, the one who makes him forget the world, the one who loves him just as much as he loves them. He also knew that the gray strings hidden under their gloves denied their marriage. Only soulmates bound by a red string could get married, adopt, love.

Virgil raised his head from it’s position on Logan’s chest, looking them in the eye. “Marry me.”

Logan chuckled, a hand running through Virgil’s hair. “I’d love to but you know we can’t.”

Virgil shook his head. “If our marriage would never be legal, why should we use legal means?”

Logan’s smile slid into a frown. “I don’t follow.”

“How does a wedding go, babe?”

Logan’s smile returned at the pet name. “It usually involves the soulmates saying vows and swapping their soul strings, which proceeds to glow golden around the base of the finger while the rest of the string stays red.”

Virgil nodded, his smile growing. “So, let’s do that! We don’t need any witnesses if we’re not able to make it legal anyways. What do you say?”

Logan had gotten a look in their eye while Virgil was talking that he knew all too well. His datemate was plotting something. “Well,” he said finally, “if we’re doing this, I’d want to do it as best as we can.”

Virgil nodded, moving to sit up so he could see Logan better. “Like what?”

“You mentioned vows?”

Virgil smiled, feeling excitement and just a bit of anxiety growing. “That’s doable.”

“I could pick up cupcakes instead of a wedding cake?”

Virgil nodded, grinning. “Would it be too much if I were to wear a suit?”

Logan smiled, leaning in to kiss his cheek. “Not if I wore a dress.”

They continued to plan their ‘wedding’ over the course of a few days, both preparing vows in their free time. Virgil was once asked about what he was doing by a coworker but said he was giving a speech at a relative’s wedding, not wanting to give away that what he was doing was technically illegal.

The day they’d set arrived. It was a joint day off so neither had to go into work. Virgil woke up before Logan did, depositing a kiss to their forehead before slipping out of bed. He ate breakfast, making one for Logan to find when they woke up, before heading to the spare bedroom to prepare.

A few hours later, he walked out to the living room they’d decorated the night before. He stood at the arch of paper links, his gloves discarded and suit on. He fidgeted with the edges, wanting everything to be perfect for Logan.

When they walked out, it felt like his breath was sucked out of him. His eyes swept over Logan’s frame, their dress accentuating their features. Logan’s smile could have sent birds singing when Virgil’s eyes finally made their way back up. He held out his hand for them to take as they arrived. “You look gorgeous.” He murmured in awe.

Logan chuckled, dropping their bouquet gently onto the couch. “Thank you. You look amazing as well.”

Virgil gripped Logan’s hands tightly, knowing he was first. He looked directly into their eyes while he spoke. “I’ve chosen you. To be no other than yourself, loving what I know of you and trusting who you will become. In a world that is based on who you were destined to love at birth, I’ve chosen to love you. It is free will but that does not mean it is false love. I will gladly share your name and care for you, in sickness and in health, in fair weather and storms, in every battle life throws at us. I will stand by your side and fight with you. We shall always be equals in this marriage and I would never wish it any other way. I love you and take you, Logan Croft, to be my unlawfully wedded spouse.”

Logan smiled, squeezing Virgil’s hands before beginning. “All I have in this world, I freely give to you. I promise to love you every second of every day, not just for a moment, nor for an hour, nor for a day, nor for a year, I will love you until eternity ends. Until the mountains crumble into the sea, and the oceans rise to consume the land, I will love you with everything I have. I will put you back together when you are falling apart, I will laugh with you, grieve with you. Our love is unique and something I will cherish beyond anything. I found you without the aid of a string, without anything tying our souls together, and our love is stronger for it. We have fought to love, fought to live in a world that does not want us, and we have grown and clung to each other through it all. I cannot tell where I end and you begin and I would have it no other way. I love you with all my soul and take you, Virgil Storm, to be my unlawfully wedded husband.”

They both carefully untied the gray strings around their pinkies, Virgil tying his around Logan’s left ring finger before Logan tied theirs around Virgil’s. Once they did that, they shared a kiss. Logan was the first to pull back, their eyes going down to look at the soul string tied around their finger.

The part tied at the base was now a glowing silver instead of a muted gray. Following the ends, one ended as normal while the other had grown and now connected to one of Virgil’s ends. His own string was also glowing a bright silver while the connecting string was a soft pink.

Virgil stared in shock before locking eyes with Logan. “Do you know what this means?”

“That people who have cut strings can choose their next soulmate? Or that the prejudice against those with grey and black strings is no longer justified? That we could probably go register at a courthouse and be lawfully wedded now? That-”

Virgil surged forward and captured their lips with a kiss. “It means that no one can tell us we are broken. No one can rip us apart.” He whispered before Logan tilted their head up for more kisses.

[btssavedmylifeblr]

hi bae. this might be a depressing thing to answer so feel free to ignore. (1/2) ive been into kpop for years now. i comforted myself with idols and their songs. sometimes, because of the overwhelming loneliness in my life, i had dreamed about them. I know I'm just a fan and I'm fine with that. but just to comfort myself, I thought them as my friends and sometimes people I flirt with... but the more I rely on them the more I realized how pathetic I am.

(2/2) irl nobody would love me. I'm ugly, fat, good for nothing ; a loser. I don't even deserve to enjoy their music yet alone being friends with them - even if it's imaginary - I hate myself. "why im like this" this question hunts me everyday. I was seeing a therapist and it was helping but I guess since I spend more time in my head these thoughts came back. I feel so worthless. I wish someone would love me. But why would they? im no special,im nothing. im sorry if i made you uncomfortable.

——-

Apologies for being slow to respond! I’m not uncomfortable, just was in the middle of an upload when this came in.

So I’ve struggled with mild depression on/off most of my adult life. I’ve never been suicidal and I’ve never been medicated but there is a sea of sadness and self-loathing beneath me that is always ready to drag me down when I am at my weakest. So I recognize what I call “depression brain” in this ask.

I’m not a therapist, but for me, depression brain is a toxic combination of telling myself there is something wrong with me, then trying to use my sad depression brain to figure out what is wrong with me, failing to figure to out what is wrong and blaming myself again and the cycle repeats. Depression brain wants to think its way out of depression, but it cant, because depression is not logical, it’s physical.

Here are things that have helped me climb my way back out: therapy, exercise, sunshine, journaling, creative writing, making art, music, talking with friends about stuff I love, healthy food, hydration, sex/masturbation, massage, leaving the house, having a regular sleep schedule, helping other people

Things that make me feel worse: social media, television, junk food, staying inside all day, waiting to feel better, waiting for motivation, waiting for someone else to save me/love me/fix me, not sleeping enough / sleeping at weird times, trying to think through my problems without talking to someone else, telling myself that I am unique in my suffering and no one else has ever felt this way

Notice how all of things that make me feel better are things that make me physically feel better? None of them are magic thoughts that I can think and feel better. But all of the negative things are mental traps that the depression brain lays for me.

How does kpop fit into this for me? My blog is titled BTS saved my life because four years ago I hit a bad stretch of depression and BTS helped me in wide variety of ways. Their music made me happy and kept me company on walks, while exercising, and while doing other productive things that I didn’t feel like doing, like cleaning. Fangirling over them reconnected me with old friends and helped me make new friends with a shared interest, something I had been unable to do as an adult up until then. Writing about them gave me a creative outlet that was both fun and productive and helped me feel like I was bringing joy to other people. Seeing their struggles with a lot of the same issues I was going through and how they expressed those struggles in their music helped me feel like I wasn’t walking this path alone.

But kpop can just as easily be path into the sea of depression. If you are constantly comparing yourself to idols and finding yourself lacking. Or if you get tied up in angry fanwars / drama that make us all feel ineffectual. Or if you try to get the internet to validate you / give you attention because it will never be enough. Or if you’re spending all your time sitting still in front of a screen to absorb their content. So you need to have a critical eye on the ways you use kpop in your life and prioritize those ways that make you feel better and ditch the ways that make you feel worse, even if they seem enjoyable in the moment.

One last note:

People will love you. I’m sure people already do love you and your depression brain is preventing you from seeing it. I have many wonderful people who love me very much in my life, but when I am underwater with my depression, I tell myself that they dont care about me or that I am bothering them and I can’t see how much they love me. Having people who love you is not enough though, you have to love and take care of yourself.

PS. This video on Youtube is one of the best explanations of depression that I have ever found (its only six minutes, go watch it). Also provides a good explanation for why quarantine is making everyone depressed.

Now listen to some BTS and go for a walk. It won’t fix everything. But it may help a little.

[our-smooty]

Flowerbeds and Fertile Soil: Chapter 2

Fandom: Good Omens Rating: Explicit

Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens, )Anathema Device/Newton Pulsifer

Tags:  Kidfic, Mpreg kind of, they can choose to present however so idk, Crowley Has A Vulva (Good Omens), Crowley Has A Penis (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has A Penis (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has A Vulva (Good Omens), OCs Galor, parenting, using your snake form to avoid confrontation, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Pregnancy, if I missed a tag lemme know

Summary: They could do anything, go anywhere, all without the worry of Above or Bellow making a fuss. Even so, they mostly kept to their little patch of Eden, their cottage and garden and the simple life they’d carved out among the locals. Aziraphale opened a book shop in town, where he only occasionally sold any books (and the ones he did sell, were all modern and stocked specifically for that purpose). Crowley focused his attentions on the garden, and if he occasionally helped their elderly neighbour with her disobedient willow tree, then that was a secret no one needed to know. Lately, however, they had both been feeling rather restless, unbeknownst to each other. Aziraphale tried reorganizing his store, changing the way he tied his bowtie and even ate pizza –something he considered to be far too messy for him personally. Crowley had branched out into birdwatching, and then car maintenance (the human way), and even reading. Nothing scratched the itch for either of them.

Ao3 Link

My Ko-Fi

“Oh Crowley,” the angel moaned right in his ear, breath hot and damp and making the baby hairs near his temple stick down. Crowley was pressed into the bed below Aziraphale, the entirety of his back in contact with glorious, soft skin. The hot hardness of Aziraphale’s cock inside him, splitting him open and really making him feel it. “So good, love, so good for me.”

“Aziraphale,” Crowley moaned into the pillows, canting his hips back, trying to get more of the angel inside him. Aziraphale’s cock was thick and long, hitting all those perfect spots inside. “Aziraphale yes.”

“I’m not going to last dear.” Crowley shuddered and thrust his hips again, trying to force Aziraphale to move. It worked and the angel began pulling back, then thrusting in at a slow, indulgent pace. “You’re so wet for me, so soft.”

“For you, angel, for you--!” And it was true, Crowley had never felt this way with anyone else. He’d had many human partners over the years, some he’d even sort of cared for, but none of them could compare to what he felt for Aziraphale. His love for the angel was a white-hot, burning thing that ate up anything in it's wake. “Take me, take me, take me.”

"I will,” Aziraphale answered darkly, keeping the slow speed but pushing in harder and there--! “I’m going to take everything you can give me Crowley, and then I’m going to give it all back.”

That was a very Aziraphale way of saying he was going to cum inside the demon, filling him up in that way Crowley craved from time to time. Tonight he’d practically begged for it, rutted into Aziraphale’s lap as he read until the angel noticed the dampness seeping from Crowley’s sex onto their trousers. Crowley hadn’t outright said anything, but Aziraphale always seemed to just know what he needed.

“Oh please angel, do it, do it!” Crowley was mindless with pleasure, clawing at the bed and howling as each thrust pummeled his g-spot. His clit barely brushed the bedsheets on the downswing but it didn’t matter, he was going to cum no matter what. Even though he’d already come twice with Aziraphale eating him out and once from his fingers. Whenever Aziraphale took it upon himself to spoil Crowley he always did a very thorough job.

Aziraphale removed his hands from where they’d been pinning Crowley’s arms to the bed to ghost over his hips. One of them cupped the demon’s lower belly, pressing and kneading at the flesh there. Crowley moaned at the added pressure. Though it really shouldn’t have, it shot a bolt of lust through him. There was something about the protectiveness and maybe the possessiveness of the action that made things that much more intense. 

“Built to take me--oh Crowley good Lord you wicked, lovely thing!” Aziraphale was babbling but Crowley didn’t care. He liked hearing Aziraphale’s voice, and he especially liked hearing Aziraphale’s voice say those things. There was a gathering heat in his belly, right under the angel’s hands and he began whining, high pitch and needy.

All of a sudden the only thing he could think about was how it would feel when Aziraphale came inside him. How wet he’d be, the noises, the sticky-satisfied feeling he’d leave behind. How Aziraphale would, possibly, beg to eat him out afterward. What would happen if Crowley, for just one brief second, gave in and tweaked his anatomy, switched a few things on. The mere idea of having something of Aziraphale and him inside him, some proof of their love and their devotion to each other, was enough to make him clench down subconsciously. 

“O-oh Crowley!” Aziraphale stammered his cock thickening and then spilling honestly excessive amounts of cum inside him. Between the pressure of the angel’s hand on his belly and the swelling of the cock inside Crowley felt so full, so full--he couldn’t help but come, convulsing against the sheets with a strangled, low moan. 

The moments between when they came and when Aziraphale pulled out were nothing but warm, contented bliss for Crowley. He couldn’t have cared less about what was going on around him; his mind was stuck somewhere in that gentle, soft place created by the bed and Aziraphale’s weight on his back. He’d been right, things felt downright soaked down there, and the stickiness was more than a little unpleasant. It was worth it though, for a sense of pure satisfaction he felt. Behind him, Aziraphale was nuzzling against his spine, staying as close as possible. 

“Crowley?” the angel hummed, voice sleepy and sated. Crowley wiggled happily, grinding his arse back against the soft cock still pinned there. 

“M’good angel, s’good,” he slurred. There was cum leaking out of him and onto the bedsheets. He reached down to stick a few fingers inside, keeping it there for a little while longer. “Why’d you pull out?”

“I didn’t want you to be uncomfortable, darling,” Aziraphale answered. “Normally you’re so sensitive after.” 

“I am sensitive, that’s what makes it good,” Crowley laughed, shuddering as Aziraphale ghosted his hands over his hips and arse. They could go again, of course they could they weren’t actually human. They could fuck as many times as they wanted in a row without the need to stop and rest if they so chose. It just happened both of them both chose to let themselves be a little more human than the average demon or angle. Eventually, Crowley removed his fingers from his cunt and Aziraphale rolled onto his side, pulling Crowley along with him so they were spooning. 

“Are you tired?” Crowley asked. Sometimes Aziraphale didn’t feel like sleeping, though he did so much more often now that they lived together. Crowley still preferred to sleep on a regular schedule, however, so he always asked before passing out and trapping the angel. 

“Very, you wore me out thoroughly, Crowley,” Aziraphale murmured into Crowley’s hair. It’d come free of the braid the demon normally kept it in and fell in sweaty hanks around his shoulders. Between that and the drying cum between his legs, Crowley was beginning to feel uncomfortable, so with a snap, they were both clean and the bed linens were fresh. 

“Good, wanna sleep with you.” He was already drifting off when he felt Aziraphale shifting behind him, running soft hands up and down his sides. Usually, when they were about to sleep, Aziraphale would go still and silent. Even after 10 years of sporadic sleeping, it didn’t come naturally. But now he was moving, keeping Crowley awake with his constant petting.

“I wanted to ask if you’ve given any more thought to that… thing we talked about a few days ago?” Aziraphale’s voice was still quiet, but much less sleepy than Crowley’s own. 

“What thing?” He was more interested in getting reacquainted with their comfy pillow and sheet set than doing much thinking. The 1000 thread-count sheets had been one of his choices since Aziraphale knew nothing about fabrics outside of his clothes. The colour had been a compromise, a nice earthy green that they could both agree on (though Aziraphale had fought long and hard for tartan, Crowley stood his ground). 

“The, well, the baby thing?”

For a few moments, Crowley could only think about the strange thoughts that had taken over him right as they both climaxed. They’d been nice thoughts, little fantasies he’d planned on keeping to himself. But they were fantasies and he knew that. Apparently the angel couldn’t understand that. 

“Told you no, thought I made that clear,” he said, sobering some and shaking off the afterglow. His desire to snuggle further into the pillows and sheets was immediately crushed; all he could think about was getting away from this conversation. “You said you wouldn’t keep going on about it.”

“But you want the same as me, Crowley, I can feel it!” So much for sleeping in his nice comfy bed. Crowley slithered out from under Aziraphale’s arm and to the edge of the bed. Sure, Azirahale could feel things in the way that angels and demons could feel lots of things others were experiencing, but it was all up to interpretation. Crowley wanted, yes he wanted, but there was a difference between wanting and getting that his angel didn’t seem to understand. “It’s not like you to be scared like this! Id we could just talk--”

“Shut, up!” Crowley seethed, willing his legs not the shake as he left the bed in search of his trousers. Surely there was a bar open somewhere where he could drink himself silly and no one would try and talk to him. Or maybe he could take the Bently out for a drive, burn off all this extra feeling on a long country road.

“I don’t even think this is about Heaven and Hell!” Aziraphale shouted from where he sat on the bed, arms crossed and face ruddy. “Crowley I see how you look at the girls, how you never want to leave after our meetings with them. And I’ve seen you for 6000 years being especially kind of children. I can sense love and you love children. I’ve never known you to let Above or Below stop you from getting something you want. Why now, that we’re finally free to--”

“We are a demon and an angel! Can you even imagine the things Heaven and Hell would do to get their hands on our children? You remember what they did to the Nephilim, yes? How they were destroyed, or turned into monsters haunting the lowest pits of Hell? N-now think, just God-damned think Aziraphale, if that was our kid! I couldn’t live with myself if that happened, or if they came out all wrong because of what I am, or--”

“Because of what you are?” Aziraphale interrupted brown furrowing. “Crowley is this about you being a demon?”

“Of course it’s about me being a demon! We don’t even know if an angel and a demon can… and if we can if the demon bits will work with the angel bits or if they’ll just ruin everything. Oh Somebody what if they turned out s-sick or s-something, because of--” He hadn’t even considered the fact that him being a demon could taint the kid. Or maybe he had, but he hadn’t thought about it because kids could not happen. And if they didn’t happen, he didn’t have to think about how his Fall was still torturing him over 6000 years later. 

“Crowley!” Aziraphale called, getting out of the bed and rushing over to where Crowley had stopped dead in the middle of the room. “Crowley dear calm down!”

“Don’t tell me to bloody calm down! I told you to drop it! And you won’t stop asking! It can’t happen!” He was getting hysterical now. Hadn’t they been over this before? Why did Aziraphale have to keep dragging everything back up? Rubbing what they couldn’t have in his face over and over. There were tears at the corners of his eyes and he wasn’t sure if they were from anger or frustration. Aziraphale stood a few feet away hovering guilty.

“It’s not fair!” Crowley bemoaned through clenched teeth. That was the core of it, wasn’t it? That they could have anything they wanted not, except for this. Because he’d asked questions, stupid questions 6000 years ago. The regret was strong enough to make him gag a little. “If I h-hadn’t Fallen, we could h-have--” 

“Crowley, Crowley, Crowley,” Aziraphale said breathlessly. “I didn’t realize--I’m sorry.” Aziraphale was often a little tone-deaf to situations like that, but he usually knew not to push once Crowley said no. Stupid, headstrong angel, who was moving too fast now?

“I told you we can’t, you said you’d drop it but you aren’t.” He took a deep breath before turning away from the angel to look for his shirt. “You aren’t fucking listening to me, I said we can’t! I can’t! And you going on and on about it isn’t going to change that!”

Aziraphale watched him get dressed silently. It was unusual for the angel to have nothing to say, but then again it was also unusual for Crowley to get this upset. Crowley rarely raised his voice, not in anger at least, and never towards Aziraphale. The fact that he’d gotten close made it abundantly clear that unless one of them backed off, this fight was going to cause some serious damage.

“I think I’m gonna go back to my flat for a while, cool off.” It nearly physically hurt him to say, but it was necessary. If Crowley didn’t put some distance between them now he knew from experience that one of them would say something truly hurtful. But even if it was for the best, it was still extremely difficult.

“O-oh,” Aziraphale whispered, hie eyes immediately beginning to shimmer with unshed tears. Crowley had kept flat for instances like this, where one or both of them needed time to themselves. He hadn’t had to use it very often in the last decade, but there were occasions where one of them felt strongly about something, and the other disagreed, so it had come in handy. The transition from hereditary enemies to lovers wasn’t always as smooth as expected. 

“I’ll be back in a few days, call if you need anything.” Of course he’d answer if Aziraphale needed anything, he wasn’t that mad. The angel wiped at his eyes and nodded glumly. It was a sorry sight, and enough to make Crowley soften a little. “Two days, OK? Just give me some time.”

Aziraphale looked up and offered a sheepish look. “Yes, OK. I’m sorry dearest.” Suddenly he seemed to remember he was completely naked and snapped his fingers so a soft, taupe robe fell around his form. “If you could let me know you’re alright… I would appreciate it.”

Crowley sighed again then snapped his own fingers so he was wearing a full outfit. It was late outside, and getting colder, so he added a jacket and scarf before turning to leave. “I’ll text you, angel. Get some sleep.”

The Bently was, of course, waiting for him in the driveway where he’d left it after running out to pick up lunch. Crowley stalked over to it and flung himself into the drivers seat. Right before he pulled out he saw a swish of the curtains to their bedroom window, then a shock of light hair. It really was hard to stay mad at the angel. But if 10 years of cohabitation and 6000 years of waiting had taught him anything, it was that boundaries were important. And Aziraphale had stamped all over his.

[mellorad]

.

[wakandascrystal]

The Nanny

Pairing - Erik x Black!!reader  

genre - Angst, jealousy, fluff etc.

summary- When a job opportunity that you couldn't miss comes up you choose to leave your husband and kids with help to cater to them through the 4 months but as soon as you return it seems like mommy has been replaced.

A/N -  I wrote on and from my way to school sorry if it seemed rushed

“Nah...Hell no. You ain't going.“ Erik shouted as he held the letter from your firm in his hands. “Did you even read past the first line.” “I don't need too. Don't have too. They can find someone else who doesn't have a life to take care of there messy war stuff for them..” “Erik...you don't understand. I need this. If.... If I win this case I will be helping people.... This is a big opportunity from me..for us.“ He scoffed getting up to slowly power walk around the kitchen. “What about the twins and Nala. You gonna up and leave me alone with them as well.“ You wanted to curse him out. how small and selfish can he be. Erik was being ridiculous. He knew this is what you were working up towards. You were Very good Lawyer but taking on an international case like this one Erik was holding in his hand would solidify your foot in the door with the big boys but Erik didn't see that. You took off your apron and held his hands trying to make him understand how much you needed this. He couldn't look you in the eyes- that's how angry he was. “Baby it's just 4 months. I'll be back. It not like am leaving for a whole year.“ he let out a breath. “Erik this is big. Huge! Other lawyers dream to handle a case like this and I was chosen to do that. My hard work is paying off baby. Am going to the UN…..the fucking UN…..A black women at the UN ...do you know how good that looks for us...for the black community. Listen they can call me whatever they want to but when am done they won't be to help the fact that the baddest black bitch in law saved the world.” Erik couldn't help but smile looking away from you. He loved it when you were passionate about your job but he didn't want you to leave either. “And I won't only have the support of my peers but also the loving support of my Husband….” It sounded more like a question but Erik didn't catch on. “Okay let's say I do let you leave for 4 whole ass months….How am I supposed to manage the kids? I know am a good father but I don't know their schedules and play dates and diets. All I know is that Aaden and Kwezi don't eat seafood.” You couldn't help but blush at your husband. He was thinking about. You could tell. That all you wanted. “First of all your an amazing Father and Don't worry I have a plan. What you thought I was going to leave my babies stranded. Not this Momma. I went on this certified site on the internet and found a nanny.” “(Y/N) You know how I feel about you and the Internet.” “It's nothing like that E. She's perfect I interviewed her a couple of times last week. We had brunch and we bonded. I showed her Our schedules, Important dates and am so lucky no one's birthday is soon.” You went back to the stove to check the curry you were cooking for dinner. “Don't worry Baby I told her about your basketball team and that Nala has dance class on Wednesdays and Fridays. That grandma comes to visit on the weekends and that you Elijah and Jordan and them have poker night every Sunday and that she should prepare snacks. I also told her the boys play soccer and football and that we…-” You felt Erik's strong arms slip around your waist. He back hugged you placing his chin on your shoulder. “Damn....Am gonna...miss you” Your heart dropped. You turned to meet his gaze. “I'll be a phone call away. You know this.” Your voice was softer since he was so close to your face. “And we got 4 days before I leave.” Erik lifted you and started kissing you on the kitchen counter. He moaned into your mouth and you lost your mind. He didn't waste time pulling your dress up and panties down. “Erik...the kids ...are upstairs..they ...can come down anytime and see.” You tried to form a sentence as he kisses your inner thighs. Planting wet kisses that were turning you on. He spread your legs wider and went it, dragging his tongue on your pussy and skillfully sucking. Your moaning got louder and louder. “E...E!” “Mommy are you okay?” Your legs wrapped around Eriks face so quickly so that Nala wouldn't see her father face between her legs behind the counter. “Hey, baby. You up from your nap.” Your 5-year-old daughter rubbed her eyes and yawned at the top of the stairs. He curls all over the place she pouted. “Mommy I'm hungry and ...Aaden and Kwezi Are playing with Daddy's shoes again.” You felt Erik twitch between your legs. He hated how the twins put on his Jordans on and play around with them. “Baby go tell the boys to leave daddies shoe alone  before I come up there..and tell them to get ready for dinner.” The sleepy little brown girl ran up and did as you said...Gave Erik enough time to give you a mind-blowing orgasm. After lunch, you sat the kids down and told them what would be happening. The twins were really not that bothered . They maybe thought you were going for a weekend and coming back like you usually do but Nala sat on your bed holding her Tiana princess doll with tears in her eyes. “Mommy cant I come with you. I'll be good I promise I won't make a mess of things.” You heart dropped when her tears fell. “Nala I'll be back sooner than you know.” “But whos gonna braid my hair and help me pick pretty clothes to wear.” “I have someone very special for that and when mom’s done saving the world. Daddy is going to take us to Disneyland.” Your promise of the trip did nothing. She still looked sad “I will always be here and i will always love you okay.” She nodded and wiped her tears away. After you put the twins and Nala to bed Erik helped you with packing for the trip. He was silent the whole time. Handing you all your old and ugly granny panties thinking what the hell you need your red lace g strings for. You packed for about 1 months worth of clothing the rest you would buy on the way there. After the awkward packing section with Erik. You offered him a back massage. He didn't answer you with a yes but you knew he wanted it. After pushing him on the bed and oiling up his back you started kneading him it with your scented vanilla and strawberry oils. “You tryna make me miss you more.“ You bite your lip trying to hold back a laugh. “No...I do this every week E. What makes this message any different ?“ “Now you leaving...You gonna leave me for some French Nigga? “ A wave of emotions came over you. You were angry and pissed. Why would he think that? “You really think I would do that to you?“ You didn't stop bring your pressed thumbs down his back. He didn't answer.

“I dont know the African soccer players there... They might steal your ass from me.“ “Erik! You really think I would throw away my kids and husband for a man I don’t even know??“ He jumped slightly shocked by your outburst. “Damn baby, Chill.“ “Don't tell me to chill when you laying here calling me a cheater.“ His eyebrows pulled together, confused and mostly worried. “It was a light-hearted joke (Y/N).“ “Don't joke about that.“ You uped and rolled off his back. Power walking to the bathroom your eyes started watering. The reality was starting to hit. you were going to be away from Erik and the kids for 4 months and a meaningless joke got you triggered like this. Seeing your young daughter’s eyes wall up broke your heart. You have no choice you already committed yourself. Erik later followed you into the bathroom leaning on the door frame. "It's going to be okay. I can't believe I'm saying this but.....Am proud of you.” “You know me so well you can tell am nervous.....“You gave him a nervous giggle trying to wipe the tears off your face. “Yeah come on lets sleep. The sooner you go the sooner you come back“ He slowly drifted of to bed and you tucked him in planted a kiss on his cheek. That's when you started sorting your papers and work files, pulling out your laptop checking emails with your partners who were across the country. Your flights and Hotel bookings had been sent to you. Your Rep in France had emailed you saying how the cases were proceeding and how many people would be involved. After sorting that out you went to bed and cuddled into Erik's arms.   “Am going to miss you too..“ you said softly between his light snores.

The day arrived and you were over prepaid. Dressed in a pair of blue jeans and a black cut of top you stood in front of your family. Your luggage surrounding you at your feet you tried to make the mood less depressing as it was. “Don't worry too much okay. I will phone daddy every day and I can speak to yall like I do every day. We can facetime and skype.You can still tell me about school and soccer practice ...don't be shy and Nala please take care of daddy okay. And boys leave daddy's shoes alone. I mean it.” Your small daughter was in Eric's arms fighting back tears again but lucky the doorbell rang distracting you from the sad scene. “She’s here”You opened the door and let in the new housekeeper. She was dressed in Vans a dress and a light cardigan. Her curly hair was tied up and she looked pretty and youthful but mostly happy and excited. She was Cuban but her voice was very much New york.“Okay everyone this is Frida and she will be helping while I'm gone. Please respect her and listen to her..am talking to you two .“ You pointed to Aaden and Kwezi “Okay mommy,“ they say in unison. “Frida this is Aaden and Kwezi  and this is Nala.” They waved but didn't smile “And this is my husband Erik.“ After everyone met everyone and you showed her the house and how all the appliances work .You also gave her the needed advice then your shuttle to the airport arrived. You kissed Erik goodbye as he helped you with your bags and that was it..you were on your way to Paris. It was tiring, gruelling and testing emotional time for. You had to stay up drinking unhealthy energy drinks just to keep your energy levels up to come up with new develops to your case. Knowing that people lives were at risking made you even more stressful but hearing Eriks voice would calm you down instantly. You missed your babies. Erik would let you speak to them and make sure they still fine. After seeing videos of women mistreated and being stripped of there children you become worrisome of your little ones but if motivated you and gave you the extra courage you needed.

“You look tired?” 

“and you look beautiful.” You couldn't help but blush like a highschool girl at your husband. Facetiming with the different time zones was a bit funny but you managed.

“We saw you on the news today. The kids almost lost their minds, It was for a few seconds but they saw  you looked so ...heroic....I couldn't believe that is my baby girl.” You face heated up again.

You knew some news outlets were covering the story but you didn't want to send out an open letter to the world to catch you on the 7pm news.

“I've got a huge team behind me am just the face of this whole thing.”

“Bullshit. dont play that with me am no.-” You heard his door open and a women speaking...It must have been Frida. You understood then waited then 

“- Hey baby ...look I need to go  call you tomorrow.”

By the time you try stop him the call was over. That was rude and uncalled for. Why did he end the call? did it have something to do with Freya?

You started noticing strange things happening as well. 

Erik would miss your calls or if he didn't you only spoke to the kids. The -- Give daddy the phone line was met with a He says he's busy. The distances between You and Erik was growing and he seemed to be distracted.

2 months in you noticed Erik wearing new clothes and when you asked if he went shopping  he said

‘‘‘Nah ...This Fri got  it for me”

Fri who the fuck is fri last time you checked your house keepers name was Frida. What they got pet names now??

“You letting her buy you clothes??“ You sounded worried.

“Nah it's not like that. She just picked it up by the Mens when we went shopping.“

He saw your face scrunch up.

“Baby you stressed. Wake up and take a shower am going to sleep am tired. Bye“ He cancelled the call. You were starting to get used to him cutting you off like that. Yet you had no time to worry about his actions at the moment. 

Days passed and  The case was going very well. The enslaved women and their children were relocated in Canada but you and your team had to go back to the states to make things permanent for them and also to start up a self sustaining campaign that will help other women and children. You wanted to tell Erik you were heading to New York but a notification from Eriks friend on Instagram got your attention. It was a picture of Erik with the kids....Very family portrait type of Style pic. He had Nala on his lap and the boys in front of him. You smiled knowing that was the family you were going back to when this messy was over. But ever so slightly to the left of the shot...right on Erik shoulder was a pale arm that draped on him. Erik’s friend had tried to crop out someone but left the arm. After searching and searching and searching you found Freda’s page and there was the full picture. She was right there posing as if she was part of your family. Dressed in a summer dress her arm was around Erik. They looked like a family. They could definitely pass a a family. 

This worried you. Had erik replaced you or something...that can't be right. Maybe they were going on a family trip. But why would  Erik not tell you.

You were pacing around your hotel room now, phone on your ear waiting for Erik to pick up but he didnt?

You didn't know what to do so you tried your mom. 

“Momma you up?“

“Girl do you see the time??“ You missed her voice

“Äm sorry mamma I just need to speak with Erik is he near you. Can you give him the Phone.“

“Near....What are you talking about doll I haven't been By the house since you left.“

“Mamma dont play me right now ..you know you always come to stay the weekends and watch the kids.“

“Well that fancy Freka Freya Frewa whatever the heck you call her said She dont need me and that I should here at the home.“

“WHAT?!?! You dont come cause we need you ..You come cause I want you there. You family The kids need to be near you. That's what I want....So you telling me the past 3 months the Kids haven't seen you.“

“That what i said doll“

“And what did Erik say.“

“Oh Chile“ You couldn't feel her roll her eyes

“That no backbone having ass negro has been a yes man to that women since you left.“

“So whos be taking you to the hospital for you check ups.“

“Nah i have the one Saint marys home have......“

“Mamma You know I hate the Cheak ups they provide..That's why I work so hard so I can take you to the private hospitals..where they treat you right....Am so angry Mamma. Am gonna kill them both.”

She just laughed but you knew that laugh it was the one filled with sorrow. 

You were ready to give Erik a piece of your mind. How dare he neglect your mother. Let other women buy him clothes. 

When you landed in NY. You tried to be calm and level and it worked. No one noticed the breakdown you were having inside. You wanted to go home and strangle your husband. Thoughts like those weren't really good for a person but one night holding your phone up in the air you waited for Erik to pick up. He didnt but you were greeted with Khwezi’s face. You couldn't help but melt

“Mama.Hello?“

“hey Kwezi how are you?“

“Am good. I scored twice today at soccer practice. You didn't hear this from me but am going to be a soccer legend.“ You giggled at you over dramatics son

“am very proud of you baby. Where’s Aaden?“ 

“Him and daddy are out For a bit. Freya wanted so Japanese or Vietnamese food so they getting it for her.“ 

The only place that served Japaneses food was the next town which wasn't that far but was still too far to just go for a housekeeper. What made it worse was how late it was.

“Okay how is Daddy been lately? Yall being good like I asked.“

“Mom, Dad has been amazing he let Aaden get earrings in his ears I was going to get them to but you know me and pain aren't really vibing right now.“

You stopped breathing. How could Erik make such a decision without your say. Give the boys freedom to do what they want on or to their bodys was supposed to be talked about not him letting them do anything. And his running fucken food uber for the housekeeper now. 

“Sooo Hows FrIda?” Your voice changed and your smart son noticed that you were trying to dig.

“Why? What's in it for me?“ You rolled your eyes. This one's definitely Eriks son.

“i dont know maybe I might buy you the new PS4 accompanied with any 4 games of your choice“

His eyes blow up

“Okay. Let me go to a more suitable spot.“ After 5 minutes of him running he was back facetiming you. You notice the background to be his and his brother tree house.

“Okay mom, frida has taken over. I mean big time. She don't cook what you said she must and our school lunch is not what you said it should be either.....And Nala hates her.“ You took full offence. You sat up and he noticed.

“Wait before you say anything just listen. She asked dad to change around some furniture and she's stays with dads friends during poker and plays with them. And daddy took her out ...without us. Leaving us with his friend  ”

Your little snitching may as well told you they were fucking... Your blood was running. It took you 1 years to get a conversation going with your crush Erik in Uni but this bitch has his attention within a month and his taking her on dates. Not that Erik is anti social it just that he doesn't fuck with a lot of people. That show he is. Or has he may be changed.

“Kwezi get out the cold. Go bath and tell daddy to call me when he gets home.”

“Okay I miss you. We all do.”

“I miss you to. Ill be back soon.“

He didn't call you back that night. 

2 weeks left and you were free to go home and reclaim your household. That night before going to be interviewed about to success of your case. You face timed Erik. You didn't expect him to answer but you did. “Erik Baby am so mad at you right now?“ “....What happened? I heard you won the case.“ “yes but it's You. How are you gonna tell mamma to not come and be with the kids?“ “What ?? She said I said that. That's funny cause I remember her telling me You said she should stay away while you away... “ “Why the fuck would I say that E. I always what my mom to be with us on the weekends.“ “Well, I don't know Cause Frida told me you changed her mind and sent her a text.“ What... It made sense. That bitch was trying to get rid of you. Steal your man and take your kids. But You didn't have time for that. “Erik am coming back soon... Like in a weeks time. I heard you took her on a date as well you left my kids unsupervised.”  He sighed “first Sean was with them and no it wasn't a date it was her Birthday I was taking her out for a stake.“ “I don't care if it is her anything you don't do that... when I come back And ama need her out when I come. “ “What's the hostility about.” “No hostility just me wanting my life back. I will also...Erik, what's that on your neck?“ The red blush marks on his neck were all of a sudden highlighted now that you noticed “Oh yeah.....this.... i...I hurt myself.“ “...Why are you nervous...“ he let out a sight “Why are you drilling like I did something.“

Why are you drilling like I did something.“

“Why do all our face times end with us fighting and you cutting me off.“ “I....I don't know “ Erik’s I don't know really meant I don't want to have this conversation anymore.��

 “See you when I get home then.“ For the first time, you hang up on him. You thought it would feel good but it didn't. You felt like shit and you were losing your husband.  

 You had taken a shower and wiped your fresh tears off your face when you started scrolling Instagram. You went on to Frida’s page and she had posted a semi-nude selfie of herself. The roundness of her breast just behind her arm. Her curves refected of the mirrors and shower glass. She pouted her lips and curled her hair her neck sprinkled with red heckey. But something was a bit off...the gold sequence in the background of the bathroom tiles seemed so familiar to you

The black tiles and with the golden finished that she had tried to blur up looked very much like your own bathroom. You didn't want to be rude but there was no way she could have a bathroom like that. Erik almost killed you when he found out how much you were willing to spend to decorate the house. most of it was in the Bathrooms and the kitchen. You spend most you time in the bathroom and kitchen why not make them look expensive. So there she was standing naked in your bathroom taking pictures. You felt so disrespected and humiliated.  

“This can't be.....He got hickeys and she got hickeys and she's  naked in my bathroom. Mama ain't around. She buying him clothes. She's in family pictures and hangs out with the Eriks friends....“

You didn't want to think about it but maybe Erik was being unfaithful. The rude way his been speaking to you and he's been so quick to defend FrIda too. No matter what happens moving forward your first priority was your children now.

What would you do?

Tags : If you didn't want to get tagged am sorry.

@thebeautysurrounds @hearteyes-for-killmonger @imaginewhoever @myboyfriendgiriboy @sweetsexysavagery @killmoncoochie @killmongersaidheyauntie

[lovehyunjn]

a soft post for a soft boy. (i was literally just thinking of this scenario while lying in bed pls don’t come @ me if there are spelling errors or whatever i just wanted to type it out)

type: fluff

hyunjin x reader

you seriously couldn’t sleep, no matter what you did you just ended up tossing and turning before facing the ceiling with your eyes wide open. you had tagged along with the boys to kcon new york, excited and happy that they had this opportunity to perform, and even more excited that you got the chance to explore the city with hyunjin.

you looked over to the other bed next to you, the soft snores of one of the stylists reaching your ears. you were separated from hyunjin and you always had a hard time falling asleep without him, hence why you were struggling to find some shut eye.

“maybe he’s still awake?” you thought to yourself. it was only 12:37am and if you recalled correctly the boys only just finished their vlive, hyunjin would probably be awake right? at this point, something was better than nothing as you slipped the covers off of your body and toed on the flimsy slippers provided by the hotel. you made sure to grab the room key off of the dresser and headed out to hyunjins room.

luckily he was only a few doors down from yours as you knocked quietly. a few seconds passed before you raised your hand again, only for the door to open and reveal hyunjin. you wondered how he could still look so good this late at night; his bed head wasn’t even that bad, only a few strands of hair out of place. the soft look on his face made your heart melt, looking like he had just woken up (probably bc he just did) but still a faint smile on his face upon seeing you.

“did you need something?” he asked quietly, not wanting to wake jisung who was sleeping soundly behind him.

“what, i cant just stop by and see my boyfriend whenever i want to?” you teased pushing past him gently to get inside, not wanting people to witness the pink hello kitty fuzzy pajama pants you wore outside in the hall.

“yeah sure come in,” hyunjin rolled his eyes a little, but the smile on his face gave away how he really felt. he patted the unoccupied bed as you both sat down.

“i cant sleep,” you sighed, “it’s hard for me to sleep without you.” there was a slight pout on your lips when you finished your sentence and hyunjin swore his heart almost leapt out of his chest from how adorable you looked, but instead he laughed and retorted, “jeez i knew you loved me but not being able to sleep without me? you’re cute.”

you attempted a glare and grabbed one of the pillows sitting on hyunjins bed and hit him in the head with it.

“shut up just help me go to sleep i’m tireddddddd”

“fine, come with me” hyunjin offered you his hand as he led you out to the balcony.

“wait why is your room so much better why do you have a balcony”

“because i’m a top class world idol now, duh” this time it was your turn to roll your eyes as you tried to restrain the urge to use the pillow under jisungs head to hit hyunjin.

“yeah mhm okay idol, let’s just go outside”

as the two of you stepped outside, you shivered from the cold new york breeze. you curled into the corner of the loveseat as hyunjin sat down next to you. a chill came upon you as another breeze came, hyunjin grabbed your hands and placed them in between his own, warming them. he laid his head in the crook of your shoulder as you played with the ties of his hoodie.

“i know you were sleeping, i’m sorry i woke you up” you said guilty, feeling bad that you were taking away some of his sleep when he needed it. his schedule wasn’t getting any less busy with more promotions and practices and training sessions being added in. hyunjin shook his head before moving to place his head on your lap, his legs curling into him as you brushed your fingers through his hair.

“it’s fine,” he said, “we don’t get to see eachother enough as it is. i’m glad you came with us to new york. and i can endure anything as long as i’m with you,” he gave you a sweet smile as you blushed at his comment.

“still, i feel bad taking away your sleep when you’re already so tired as it is. you can go to sleep if you want, i don’t mind, i just want to be with you.” you curled a piece of his hair around your finger as he sighed and turned his head to fall asleep.

you looked out at the skyline before you, even at night new york was alive as ever, maybe even more than it was during the day. you took in the glowing lights and honks and sirens of cars as you hummed quietly. a few moments passed before hyunjin murmured softly.

“can you sing me a song? any song, i just want to hear your voice.” you were taken aback by his sudden request, but complied nonetheless. a random song did indeed come to mind as you sang a song from tangled (this song is legit one of my fav disney songs).

“all those days watching from the windows, all those years outside looking in, all that time never even knowing, just how blind i've been,

now i'm here blinking in the starlight, now i'm here suddenly i see, standing here it's all so clear, i'm where I'm meant to be

and at last i see the light, and it's like the fog has lifted, and at last i see the light, and it's like the sky is new

and it's warm and real and bright, and the world has somehow shifted, all at once everything looks different, now that I see you”

you looked down at hyunjin lovingly, his eyelashes fanning out against his cheeks, his lips inhaling in softly. you brushed away stray pieces of hair from his face as you traced his brow with your thumb.

“all those days chasing down a daydream, all those years living in a blur, all that time never truly seeing

things, the way they were

now he’s here shining in the starlight, now he's here suddenly i know,

if he’s here it's crystal clear, it’s where i'm meant to go”

you chuckled softly as you changed the lyrics to fit hyunjin, your hands still brushing through his hair as you looked into the dark new york sky, still not sleepy, but for reasons different than before.

[dramazones]

Oh Wow! Im finally here with a headcanon birth chart and analysis for jamie!

i'm on mobile so I cant even put this long ass post under a read more i am so fucking sowwy but anyways a lot of this was inspired from dewmie-in 's meta posts and also i rlly love astrology so pls follow them first of all or else ur a fake fan shhfhgjsjkfkd

☀️ ♓︎ Pisces Sun ♓︎ ☀️

There is no doubt that Jamie is a pisces sun. Some of the well known characteristics of a piscean are being the artistic ones, the ones more in touch with their emotions and the absolute dreamers of the zodiac, I can assure you this as a mercury and moon piscean!

And it’s quite obvious that these traits 100% match up to jamie’s surface character being a big theater nerd, writer, poet, and as an actor, he HAS to understand emotion in all its forms! While being the more compassionate of signs, that also comes with sympathy, and maybe even empathy.

to which he expresses when he tells steven that a good story with a quality protagonist HAS to include said protagonists struggles as well, now this might be a reach but perhaps this was self projecting after his own struggles in kansas, maybe even foreshadowing ooOoOh

(“a real hero must struggle” jamie struggles living in kansas, moves back to beach city, nails his first production and gains management position @ the theater, aka his heroic ending i guess idk, then more theater related accomplishments as mentioned in letters to lars ofc)

☽♎︎ Libra Moon ♎︎☽

One of the biggest desires for any libra placement is balance, And the moon sign being the emotion sign, Libra moons desire an emotional balance as much as they do in their environment. Libra Moons can also be known as a “people person” while typically depending on the study of others to lean their own nature.

Jamie fits the Libra moon description being a sort of people person himself. Though he’s capable of keeping a friendly conversation with just about anyone, There’s also no doubt that this guy has severe anxiety that affects his communication with others along with his emotional stability (even affecting him physically). The thing is that he’s managed to keep the anxiety and his social skills much more balanced the more we see him or i guess as time passes, not one of them overpowering the other. (see venus in scorpio as to why he limits himself socially as much as he would his anxiety)

While he desires emotional balance that also comes with a feeling of frustration and defeat when things are even slightly out of balance (also a symptom of anxiety ; easily irritated/defeated) such as his improv performance in letters to lars, ending his performance within a minute after feeling overwhelmed as it started going south.

So while there are several moments of him maintaining an emotional balance he also has another side of the scale that’s less balanced (astrology word play lmao) such as a general lifestyle balance, also nonexistent for jamie (even though your lifestyle heavily affects your behavior) in a sense that he lacks of a healthy sleep schedule being a mailman AND an actor, one occurring from the early morning to the afternoon and the other job occurring at night. Probably irrelevent but its MY sleepover and Ill add as much necessary info in this birth chart reading as i please.

Im also including buddys book as an example because though it was only jamie being the faceclaim for buddy theres no denying that since historical friction theres at least some parallels between the two characters sharing the same traits (being writers, returning to beach city to prosper in their careers, being absolute drama kings)

♀️♏︎ Scorpio Venus ♏︎♀️

One of the biggest aspects to Jamie’s character INCLUDES being an absolute sucker for romance so lets get this bread and talk abt his relationships w/ everyone and his views on love uwu

Scorpio being a water sign means healing is one of the largest aspects to the sign. Healing nonetheless comes with a relation to trauma being from the planet representing death itself. Life and Death go hand in hand to define each other, ya feel me.

while were on the topic of death lets bring back the parallelism between jamie and buddy thats been around since historical friction. in the play buddy is presumed dead up until william reaches beach city. ok. so hear me out. perhaps that was foreshadowing for jamie’s traumatic near death encounter with topaz and aqua. remember how I said the water element represents healing as well as trauma??? It all kinda ties in yall...

ANYWAYS It’s safe to say that Jamie is a person that’s been through his rock bottom AND trauma already (his death if you will), struggling to live a happy, or even regular (lets face it as far as we know the only thing he came back to beach city with was sunglasses, bitch was broke) life in kansas, the abduction, its not something you can heal from overnight. While he does show symptoms of severe anxiety (to say the very least) even after the abduction he’s also grown closer to working on healing, moving on from his overwhelming fear of rejection by prospering in theater (him coming back to life if u will), and as for anything directly related to the abduction is unknown, but its very likely he’s working on moving on from that on his own as far as we know!!

which brings up the next trait of a scorpion venusian! They prefer to be a mystery in order to protect themselves as a result of fear of getting hurt for trusting/opening up too much. The first time we see jamie since the abduction is during the re-election in dewey wins, where he doesn’t seem affected at all. Yes, Jamie is a pretty open book for the most part (see dewmie-in’s analogy to in/out of the closet in historical friction) however theres also moments where he limits himself, or perhaps another side to himself, a far more passionate side…

Holding back tears during his drama zone and waiting until hes alone to be excited abt delivering his letter in love letters, playing it cool when earning theater director position in historical friction, not to mention his room SHOULD play a very huge role in his secretive side. (see brodingle’s post on jamie’s room, his casual side vs his passionate side)

the venus in scorpio (or any scorpio placement rlly) also remains a secret not truly by choice, but theyre also studying others of interest. being an actor, Jamie should know a thing or two on body language and raw emotion as he sees it.

And finally, The venus is scorpio is a devoted, passionate, and emotionally attached lover. in love letters he falls for someone easily, and even if he learned in the end love at first sight isnt real he is most definitely the type to fall easily based on emotional connection alone! Also, his fear of rejection can easily play into his love life as well. Being in kansas getting constantly rejected and returning back home out of not just defeat but most likely homesickness as well. He missed his stable job. he wants stability, loyalty, commitment! yeah ok thts all i got for now ladies!

♂️♍︎ Virgo Mars ♍︎♂️

Mars being the planet of impulsiveness, energy, initiation and “doing it” being born under the sign of doing it efficiently and orderly gives a handful of traits that completely match up to Jamie and the way he puts out his energy into the world

Jamie has been the type to not just instantly put his energy into something new, but he’s also put his energy into mastering said thing! While Mars is the planet of impusiveness, Virgo is the sign of patience, the Virgo mars is a firm believer of practice makes perfect, and striving for overall perfect, which does in fact get overwhelming for Jamie the perfectionist.

In historical friction, though hesitant, he was not afraid to critique and analyze dewey’s writing skills. And although he was anxious again to go against deweys script and use pearls version instead, he went with pearls because he desperately needed to execute his first play flawlessly. this also occurs again in letters to lars, when his improv performance doesnt go as planned he doesnt just end it from there, in fact, he still has that sense of patience to critique his cast members on stage before getting completely irritated when they dont comply. imo its important to note this duality of patience and impulsiveness because this is an anxiety inducing combination that heavily matches up to Jamies energy.

it’s also important to bring Jamie’s room back in this, because while it was creepy as shit its also FILLED with books, and has really fancy stationery meaning he is in fact a writer. The Mars in Virgo is an attentive to detail oriented person, and being a writer, Jamie not only reads others’ works, he records his own with plenty of detail as seen in his love letter to garnet. Its in his nature by now to have an eye for detail as seen in his room, his costumes, his writing, etc.

Its very likely that his venus and his mars sign do sort of relate in a sense of the way he will present himself. The virgo mars wants a deep connection as the next person but refuses to express that “passionate side” as much as others, preferring to remain casual or present a “cool exterior” which plays into the venus in scorpio’s preference for a secretive side or to remain a mystery.

lets also not forget Jamie’s mime performance in Sadie’s Song. His body language easily read as excited and desperate for perfectionism. Theres no denying he spent time and energy into his act, probably studying mimes and all lol

plus the virgo mars being an attentive to detail type of person, scorpio venus’ silent study on their person of interest and libra moon’s dependance on the study of others to learn how to express emotion when and where and how all tie into each other. Jamie depends on detail before well, doing! he is the type to not just think before acting but hes also gotten quite anxious overthinking as well!

The Taurus Ascendant is a sucker for stability, loyalty, especially to their passions with change being their biggest weakness, very fitting to Jamie. Stability is what made Jamie return to beach city from Kansas because he was not used to such a drastic change in an unstable life, doing the absolute opposite of prospering in his acting career, another big desire for a taurus rising btw, they thrive for success!

They also need a sense of security and any chance at risking that security is a big no-no for the Taurus Ascendant. Jamie’s constant fear of rejection, his anxiety before a production that could make or break his career, he desires a sense of reassurance and security that will assure him that things will not turn out as horribly as his anxiety’s (cough drama zone cough) made it out to be.

⬆️♉︎ Taurus Rising ♉︎⬆️

now, in Reunited, hes completely moved on from garnet at this point. This takes places after the abduction, the only thing that would really be on his mind rn is healing and finding peace again with himself and in his surroundings. while hes handled this healing process alone (as far as we know) hes also learned about what he wants for himself including his love life. seeing garnet extremely happy and married and all makes him defeated for a moment not because “uUuuUUhH shes the one that got away!” its because he truly desires a passionate and devoted relationship as ruby and sapphires! which brings up the next topic!

In relationships, the Taurus Ascendant won't easily break up with someone they gave their heart to. Jamie wants a partner thats going to be as devoted and passionate as himself. He needs that sense of commitment and loyalty from someone and probably wouldn’t handle something as emotionless as one night stands for example! Any taurus placement has the same desires for romance as scorpio placements to be quite honest here, im just sayin as a venus in taurus and scorpio rising lmao.

🌊 Water Dominant 🌊

Ok so the thing is heres the thing. Out of all four astrological elements, Jamie exudes water energy the most, then earth, then fire, and lastly air. He’s not just an emotional person, he’s also an optimistic person, even when he overthinks things, he continuously looks into the future rather than his past so I think its important to note he also has that “psychic” aspect to him as well as having a strong sense of someone else’s emotions as much as his own.

let me also add in dewmie-in’s post where they point out tht jamie does in fact have a literal reocurring theme with water so even if he turns out to like not be a water sun sign in canon (highly doubt there will ever be a canon bday for him lmao the entire point of this post tho) theres no way hes gonna not be associated with water coincidentally. so if u didnt read their post tldr: being a fucking buffoon in the literal rain, throwing letters into the ocean, staring at the ocean on his free time, (aka during working ours, worlds okayest mailman) cries easily, buddy dying in water, jamie nearly being killed as instructed by a gem named aqua, jamie surviving in water after being THROWN off the ship. (i added a few more btw hshfhhdjd)

so yeah thats that on that, theres plenty more planet placements than that in a birth chart but i just felt like doing the usual ones i guess :P

[kc-anathema]

ask: Raph/Leo\Mikey, double penetration?

penetrative, sequel to natural sub

His bedroom door lay open a few inches, so Raphael heard the faint scuff of footsteps coming toward him. Looking over his magazine, he sat straighter as Donatello came in, pulling Leonardo along by a leash attached to a collar.

"Special delivery," Donatello said.

"I thought Mikey said I didn't get him for another couple nights." Raphael sat upright in his hammock, putting his feet on the floor. "Not that I'm complaining."

"Mikey's got extra training with Splinter," Donatello said. "Probably be another hour or two. Since I was done with him, Mikey said you could keep him busy."

"Huh." That raised several questions, but rather than ask, he lifted his hand, catching the end of the tossed leash. "Any rules I should know about?"

"No breaking the skin," Donatello said, counting them off on his fingers. "No deep bruising. No marks, basically. No arguing. And no gagging him just so you can rant."

Raphael fought down his smirk. "Won't say I wasn't tempted. Anything else?"

"Technically he has a safeword," Donatello said. "But Mikey said they've done some really extreme, freaky stuff and Leo never uses it, so...don't expect to hear him say 'no'."

Raphael coughed. "'No'? Not getting the concept of a safe word, bro'."

"I'll be in the lab if you need me." Donatello kissed Leonardo's cheek. "I'll have the new machine waiting for you on Tuesday. And don't forget, as soon as you wake up tomorrow, coffee on my desk, just the way I like it."

"Yes, Donatello." Leonardo watched him go from over his shoulder. Once the door was shut, he lowered his head, looking at the floor.

Raphael didn't miss the slight tremor of his hands.

Buying some time, he examined the leash. Bright orange canvas, probably so everyone remembered who Leonardo really belonged to. It was several feet with a carabiner on one end. He was a little surprised it didn't simply have a lock, then figured the only person who got to use locks was Michelangelo. Sure enough, the end attached to the collar was held without a padlock.

Curious, Raphael wound the leash around his fist a few times, pulling it taut.

"Undo the leash," he said.

Leonardo hesitated. "I can't."

"It ain't locked," Raphael said. "What, just 'cause Mikey said not to?"

"It's not that," Leonardo said. "Although Master did say not to."

"That little brat the only one you call master?"

"He likes it," Leonardo said, a faint smile betraying fond exasperation. "Donatello didn't, said to use his full name for this."

"So you have to call us what we say to." Raphael's smile grew. "If I said call me Owner of My Ass?"

"Then I would say it." Leonardo meet his look. "Owner of Your Ass."

Raphael laughed despite himself. "Okay, okay. Raph'll do. Take off the leash anyway. It's just gonna get in the way."

"I can't," Leonardo said again, tapping the carabiner. "Some of them really are that strong. This one and the ones on my cuffs, I cant budge them. He has a vise he uses to push them in."

"Huh. Well...if I guess if you can't lose it, use it."

Raphael wound the leash around and around his fist, pulling Leonardo closer. Leonardo didn't try to fight, but he put his hands around it and leaned back, keep the canvas taut until Raphael had him within reach.

"Sit. Let's get this show on the road."

Leonardo swallowed once, his gaze sliding back to the floor.

"Mikey...he had something in mind. He probably didn't think Splinter would keep him this long and—"

"Leo," Raphael said. "Sit."

"Just a little longer," Leonardo said. His voice grew small as he realized Raphael wasn't going to wait. "You know Mikey picks things up fast."

Raphael waited until his brother glanced up at him again.

"Sit." He patted the hammock beside him.

With a deep breath that shuddered as he exhaled, Leonardo came and sat beside him, hands on his lap. He didn't move, tensing as Raphael touched his cheek, put his knuckles under his chin and forced his head up. That he took Leonardo's hands, bringing them to his lips, kissing the backs, brought a confused look from his brother.

"Donny's making machines?" Raphael asked.

"Y-yes." Leonardo watched him turn his hands over for a kiss to each palm.

"He used one on you?"

"Yes." Leonardo sounded satisfied that he controlled his voice this time. "A whipping machine."

"How's it work?"

"I don't know," Leonardo said, but from Raphael's raised eyeridge, that wouldn't be enough. "It's like he said. He tied me down on a sawhorse and the thing spun around behind me. Every few minutes he changed it so it went the other way."

"With a whip?"

"A few thin strips of leather," Leonardo said. "He wanted to start small. Said he'll make a stronger one later."

"I think I'd like to see you in that." Raphael put his hand on Leonardo's cheek, gently turning him to meet his look. "Did you enjoy it?"

A blush. "...yes."

"Good. I'd like to see you squirm. But just a little."

Now Raphael took a kiss, pushing in close so that Leonardo put a hand on the hammock, holding it as he leaned back. When the kiss ended, Raphael stayed leaning over him, brushing a thumb under his eye.

"I might tie you up," he said, "but it's good knowing that ain't the only reason you stay put."

"Raph..." Leonardo started, not sure what to say.

"Now," Raphael said over him. "Let's get this started. Lock your hands together."

"...yes, Raph."

The change in his voice was immediate—softer, expectant, ready for the next command, especially now they both knew how they stood. Leonardo didn't need to worry about Raphael using this as an opportunity to abuse him.

Manhandle, whip, beat into a mattress...but not abuse.

When Michelangelo finally arrived, he found Raphael sitting up in his hammock, Leonardo between his spread legs, dutifully working the large cock in front of him. Michelangelo's gaze quickly dropped to Leonardo's ass and found it untouched, if still lined with the fading red welts of Donatello's attentions. So Raphael had spared Leonardo's feelings and let him perform as a sex slave rather than just taking him without any consideration.

Michelangelo chuckled. Not that it would do Leonardo any good in a few minutes.

Leonardo had stopped, turning to watch Michelangelo come in. Immediately he felt a light tug of the leash pulling his face up against the cock, and he went back to sucking while they spoke over him.

"Ready to share?" Michelangelo asked, locking the door.

"Figured you'd wanna split him after your workout," Raphael said. "Which end do you want?"

"Oh, I figured he'd ride us both," Michelangelo said. "He complains, but he can handle it."

Raphael tossed him the end of the leash. Leonardo was swiftly pulled up to his feet, swaying slightly as he caught his balance. Bound at the wrist, the canvas leash now formed a convenient thread to strap his hands up at his throat, and Michelangelo wound the canvas around his neck and hands, using the end carabiner to cinch his hands in place.

"You been good?" Michelangelo whispered, turning Leonardo to face him. "Been enjoying yourself?"

"Yes, master." Leonardo glanced over his shoulder. "We...reached an understanding."

"Aw, what a good little pet." Michelangelo gave him a kiss so Leonardo wouldn't see him waving Raphael close behind him. "See, this is already doing wonders for everyone. Donny's gonna get a good night's sleep, you're not arguing with Raph, I get to plow you every which way..."

As he spoke, he suddenly bent and gave Leonardo's legs a few light smacks, making him spread, then spread a little wider. And then Michelangelo put his arms under his brother and lifted, hauling him up and into Raphael's arms. Holding Leonardo's spread legs just under his knees, Raphael suddenly realized what his little brother meant to do. Raphael was just there for convenient muscle, to hold Leonardo up at the right height.

"This is gonna be tight," Michelangelo said, coming close so that Leonardo was pressed between them. "Get ready."

Who he was talking to, they couldn't tell. Leonardo look too many deep breaths, swallowing nervously, and his open mouth was too much temptation. Even as Raphael lowered him onto his cock, he pressed his mouth to Leonardo's, quieting him.

"Keep him from yelling," Michelangelo said. "He's usually pretty good, but...I should have brought a gag with me."

Michelangelo slid his cock along Raphael's, easing up against Leonardo's ass. Raphael only had his head in, but even that was enough to fill up their brother. With a little force, Michelangelo slipped in beside him.

They didn't try to push hard, instead thrusting in time with each other, making Leonardo bounce in Raphael's arms. As Leonardo pulled away, gasping for air, he was caught again by Michelangelo, silenced by his tongue. In this way they passed him back and forth between themselves, using gravity to pull Leonardo down an inch, then two, then three, deeper onto both of them.

Leonardo's mind swam in and out, growing increasingly lightheaded, as he was overwhelmed with the pressure and force inside him. His groans were swallowed before he could make them, any protests he might have had drowned in kisses. He couldn't even try to hold himself up, too wrapped up in metal and the leash to do more than bob like a toy on their cocks.

Raphael came first, but that barely relieved anything as his come filled Leonardo so that he almost thought he would find it coming from his lips. Raphael continued to thrust which brought Michelangelo over soon as well.

"...you..." Michelangelo sighed, leaning against them as he caught his breath. "You keep him tonight."

Raphael slowly lowered Leonardo to his feet, unsurprised when Leonardo folded and went to his knees, sprawling on the floor beneath them. The eldest look like he was going to pass out, staring at nothing as he panted.

"Donny gave him orders for tomorrow morning," Raphael said, grabbing the tissues from the nightstand.

"Gonna have to work out a schedule," Michelangelo said. "Well, Donny's gonna catch up on three days of sleep, so he can get his coffee in the afternoon. And then I think he's got another machine he's making?"

He glanced at Leonardo, but he was in no condition to answer.

Raphael was left to clean up, muttering about Michelangelo escaping from doing work, and he brought Leonardo up into his hammock. The canvas he could unwind, but his brother remained locked up with his bound hands at his throat. He didn't think that would be too comfortable...but as he lay down beside him, he found that it worked perfectly if Leonardo's head pillowed on his shoulder.

[magic-coffee-shop-girl]

The Bodyguard Ch.5

Chapter 1/ Chapter 2/ Chapter 3/ Chapter 4/ Chapter 5

Summary: You are a hired bodyguard who has just been employed by BigHit Entertainment. You have sworn to never get too involved with the ones you protect again since your last job ended badly. But will you be able to keep that promise to yourself or will your heart be the one who needs better protection?

You stretched as you awoke from, not the most comfortable sleep you had ever had, but then again you had slept worst as well.

You had fell asleep on the sofa in their lounge, after looking at their stuff on YouTube for a little too long you had laid down and fell asleep immediately. Your jacket was draped over you, you hadn't remembered using it as a over, but you must have.

There was a knock at the door that you were expecting. You pulled on your jacket and tied up your hair. Opening the door, the team that you had organised to set up all the security were ready and waiting.

"Good morning." You greeted them and you gestured for them to enter. It was early and there would be some noise, you hoped that they didn't wake, but you would try to be as a quick as possible. You put everyone to different stations, people to plan out the prime places to put the cameras, a security alarm at the door that would go off if the door was being forced open and would go off and wouldn't stop unless the right code was entered.

 Some of the team had even came with some new pieces of security equipment that you were eager to install. Soon the place was filled with sounds of drilling, hammering and sawing. You kept doing rounds to check on how everyone was getting on. Not too long after the noise started the boys one by one started to emerge from their rooms. Bleary eyed, bed hair sticking in all directions, their cheeks still pink from sleep and some with pillow creases still present on their faces. They groaned as they entered the noisy space.

"What's going on?" Taehyung said sleepily through a yawn.

"I'm sorry but I wanted to get things out of the way as soon as possible. I'm setting up a new security system for you guys."

Namjoon who was the last to shuffle in looked around at all the people in their place.

"Is it all really necessary?" He asked.

"I'm afraid so." You said giving him an apologetic smile.

He scratched his head and averted eye contact feeling suddenly awkward, you furrowed your brow at his sudden averted beahviour but didn't ask.

Truth be told the memory of last night had entered his mind and remembering you watching videos of him made him a little embarrassed.  

"I'm- uh- going to get changed, since I'm up now." He made a hasty retreat back into his room, the others just scratched at their heads, making their bed head worse and shuffling into the kitchen to have some breakfast. 

You watched all of them, shaking your head at their inability to handle early mornings.

Back inside his room, Namjoon sat on his bed and put his head into his hands. That felt awkward as hell, he sighed he had to get a grip.

His phone suddenly rang, he rummaged through his covers to try and find it. He managed to find it and looked at the caller ID, it was his managers. 

"Hello?"

"Namjoon. Good, you and the others should probably come in today to get in some extra practice for tomorrows performance."

Namjoon all of a sudden felt alarmed. He had forgotten about the live performance tomorrow. It wasn't a big event or anything, but they made sure every performance they gave, big or small, they'd give the fans their all.

"Yeah, of course. We'll be there soon."

"Okay, we'll meet you there."

He hung up and went to get the others. He was thinking about how you were probably not going to be that happy about going to this event, especially when it was quite out in the open.

He came back into the lounge and looked around. Noticing him looking around you figured he must be looking for the others.

"They're in the kitchen." You said gesturing with a thumb over your shoulder.

"Thanks. Um, actually before I talk to them... there's something you should know."

You finished what you were saying to the security team before you let them carry on and went over to Namjoon to hear him better.

"What is it?"

"Our manager just called. We've got some practice today."

"Fine. Just let me finish up with these guys and we can go."

"That's not the reason I wanted to talk to you."

"Oh? What then?"

"We're practicing for a performance set for tomorrow."

"What? Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't they? I would need to get a proper team set up and that leaves me with very little time."

"I'm sorry. I don't know why they didn't tell you. It kind of wasn't on the fore front of my mind since yesterday."

You couldn't really blame Namjoon. It wasn't his fault, he was under a lot of pressure. You couldn't believe that his management had kept that from you though, they probably didn't want you to interfere with any schedules that were paramount to their career right now. 

You sighed.

"It's okay. I'll figure something out. Go get your friends and get ready, I'll get a car ready."

He nodded and headed to the kitchen. You watched him leave before put your hands on your hips and looking around at the work going on. They should be done soon and you could get a team together quickly you supposed but it wasn't ideal. You'd just have to make do and make sure that when you saw their management next they'd know to keep you updated for any future events like this.

Thankfully, the security they already had was ample to cover the small event. You made sure everyone was in the car before you got in yourself in the passengers seat. The rest of the day it would look like they would be spending at practice so at least you would only have to worry about them in one place. You looked out the window, you couldn't believe that you were practically looking out for all of them at this point.They all seemed like very nice young men and it was hard not to feel protective of them quite easily. You had to make sure that you didn't get too familiar though, this was a job and nothing more.

You looked at them in the back of the car through the mirror, they all seemed to be so comfortable with each other and really good friends with the way they talked and acted with each other, you couldn't help the small smile that came, it was a cute scene.

You arrived finally and made sure that the security went on ahead to make sure everything was clear. You waited as the boys got their bags and got out of the car. 

You had also had some of the team from earlier accompany you from earlier to set up extra security here too.

You made sure that they were all safely in their studio before posting two guards at the door and going to have a talk with the managers before checking up in how the security set up was going.

As you knocked on the door of their managers office you heard some muffled voices continue before stopping to answer the door.

You were about to go into a rant about not keeping you notified when you saw their worried expressions.

"What's happened?"

You felt an odd sense of uneasiness immediately.

"Come in."

Opening the door wider they stepped aside to let you enter.

The way they were acting didn't put you at ease at all. Something must have happened since the last time you were here and it had only been yesterday.

"Well? What's happened now?"

They still said nothing simply opening a drawer and pulling out an envelope and holding it out to you.

"Another letter?"

"Yeah. It came today."

You opened it carefully and read it's contents. It was nothing new, same sort of thing, repeating the threats from all the previous ones. The only thing that was different was one that it seemed a little more personal this time and actually mentioned the other members. You felt your heart race a little more, you had felt concerned about the others but were confident that they weren't of interest to whoever was sending these, but now you weren't so sure.

"Where was it?"

"Left at the front desk."

"Did the security cameras pick up anything?"

"No, they must have found a blind spot."

"Damn it! I'm getting my team to set up as many security cameras as possible right now. Fat lot of help that does right now though. I think it would be best if you cancelled that event for tomorrow."

"We can't do that!"

"We have no idea what we're dealing with here! We should exercise extreme caution!"

"We can't just cancel on the uncertainty that something might happen."

"But it might. That's the point."

"We don't think Namjoon would like the idea of cancelling."

"Why don't we ask him? He has a right to know and decide for himself if he wants to go on with tomorrow." 

"Fine. But he might not answer the way you think he will."

"We'll see."

You went to go get Namjoon. This was ridiculous, surely he would think the same as you.

You entered the studio without knocking. They didn't notice you at first, the music blocking out your entrance. Namjoon caught sight of you in the mirror though and stopped mid spin. He motioned for the others to stop and went over to turn the music off.

"I'm sorry to disturb you, but I need to speak with you. Can we step outside?"

"Cant we talk here?"

"It's of a rather sensitive nature."

"I don't mind, if it's to do with me then I think they have a right to now too."

"I-" You looked at his determined expression and let out a sigh. "Fine. I've just been talking with your managers. I take it they never told you about the letters they've been receiving?"

Namjoon and the others shared confused expressions.

"Letters? What letters."

"I'm not sure for how long but you've been sent letters of a... alarming nature. A few threats and you received another one today. They said it had been left at the front desk. But..."

"What? What's happened?"

"The one we got today differed from the others slightly."

"Why?"

You really didn't want to make him have any cause to worry but you knew it was best in the long run for him to know.

"It wasn't just about you this time." You didn't think you needed to say anymore when you glanced over at the other members.

"It mentioned them?" 

You could see the distress on his face and felt the urge to give him a hug. It wasn't fair what was happening to him or the others. They seemed genuine and nice people who shouldn't have to experience ugliness like this.

"Look, I think it's best if you cancel tomorrow and then-"

"No."

You looked surprised as Namjoon cut you off.

"No? Listen, I know it's a tough decision but-"

"I can't let this get to me. I can't let anyone down."

He gave an unsure look to his band mates but they only nodded along with his decision. 

"He's right. You've got a job to do, but so do we." Jin said as he came to stand next to Namjoon for support.

"That's right. We've been given a great opportunity and to perform tomorrow is a way to give back all the support we've been given to get to this point. We have to go." You looked over to Yoongi who joined Jin, the others followed adding encouraging remarks to Namjoon's decision.

You couldn't believe it, but if you were honest with yourself you weren't entirely expecting anything different.

"Okay, if that's your wish. But we go immediately after the event is over. No arguments."

"But what about-"

"I know you want to please and I admire that but if they really care about you and support you then they'll understand that you're looking after yourselves. They'll understand. We leave the moment it's done."

A few guys looked like they wanted to argue but held back. It was a compromise that would have to be made for now.

"Okay? Look I have to run my ass of trying to get everything set up for tomorrow when you're done here so go back to practicing and let me know when you're ready to go."

You were about to leave when you were called back.

"Wait!"

You turned to look at Namjoon.

"Yes?"

Namjoon felt a bit nervous now, he wanted to ask if you wanted to stay but he felt the words fade before they formed.

"Uh... I- I mean, would you like to stay and watch me- us! I mean us, while we practice. I mean if you're just going to wait outside you don't have to..."

"Oh, I- uh, I wouldn't want to put you off or anything."

"You wouldn't." Namjoon answered a little too quickly.

"Alright then. Thank you."

The group surrounding Namjoon shared looks, surprised at Namjoon’s forwardness.

Hoseok jabbed him with his elbow as they went back to their positions. "Smooth, eh. Let her get a look at your moves and woo her huh?"

Namjoon shushed him. "No. I was just- ah just, no."

Hoseok laughed as he dodged Namjoons swatting hand. Namjoon shook his head slightly red in the cheeks as he went and turned on the music. When he got into position and the music started, he could feel your eyes on him and he slightly regretted his decision when he felt self conscious of every move he made, but when he caught a glimpse of your impressed and slightly smiling face in the mirror he found he was regretting it less and less.