#i just like matzah so much you don't get it YOU DON'T GET IT

[majesticcorn2000]

reigen eats matzah. that's it, that's the post

[ivystoryweaver]

With You part 6

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Summary: Will you always have to wake up in the middle of the night just to get to know Jake? Marc and Steven notice your yearning to see Jake again.

Pairings: Marc Spector x reader, Steven Grant x reader, Jake Lockley x reader. Gender neutral reader. No use of Y/N. Reader is engaged to Marc and Steven.

Word Count: 3k

Warnings/notables: Fluff, complicated relationship stuff, cursing, angst, sex but the language is not overly explicit and nothing gender-specific. Let me know if I missed a warning. inaccurate DID, based on the show. Not beta'd we die like arthur harrow in the back of jake's car

Dividers by saradika

PREVIOUSLY, on "With You"...

Wondering what he would ever do without you, Marc pulled you close, gently swaying with you in the silence of your flat. He had always felt so hard to love - his childhood had made sure of that. But you loved him hard.

One of the delicious advantages of being with Marc was that he liked to bury his angst, longing and inadequacies inside your body. Perhaps fucking through his feelings wasn't the healthiest coping mechanism, but it was better than drinking, and cheaper than therapy.

That's not to say Marc didn't see a therapist - he did, pretty regularly. But being inside you felt so much better than unearthing the shit from his childhood.

That's where you found yourself now, face down on the mattress, Marc's strong chest pressed to your back. Your sweat-soaked bodies writhed in tormented bliss as he thrust in and out of you - hard and almost frustratingly slow.

His thick fingers pushed their way through yours, intertwining, pressing your hands high above your head as he twisted his body deeper into yours.

You were helpless beneath him. And you loved it.

Marc was able to control so few things about his existence. The use of your body was one thing you happily and trustingly put completely in his control.

You and Marc did make soup together for dinner, but no matzah balls were harmed in the making of the soup. It was hearty enough for Marc, but also vegan for Steven. You made a mental note ask Jake what kind of food he liked.

"I don't think Jake's a vegan," Marc spoke up, reading your mind. "I think he's the reason my sandwiches are gone half the fuckin' time."

Marc and his sandwiches. He had sworn up and down, on more than one occasion, that either you or Steven had eaten his damn roast beef sandwiches. You always denied it, preferring turkey to beef. And Steven always fired back with, "Y'know I don't eat that shite, mate."

"Oh my god, I think you just solved a mystery," you marveled. The Mystery of the Roast Beef Sandwich and its thief.

Yeah, Marc wondered what else Jake was prone to stealing. Clothes? Money? You?

Then again, Marc couldn't really say anything about money at the moment. He didn't have a job, unless he counted the occasional times he fronted during Steven's university library shift. You were the breadwinner, at least for the time being, lovingly supporting Steven in getting a degree to actually match up to his intellect.

But sharing you? Was it even sharing if it was the same body? And was it even his business if you wanted to be with Jake? He had no fucking clue. All he knew was that you were about to be his spouse. Steven's too, really. But you barely knew Jake. How could you marry someone you didn't know?

"I can hear you thinking," you teased, slathering some fresh-baked bread with butter. "Wanna talk about it? Cause I don't think I can go anymore rounds today - between you and Steven." Meaning Marc wouldn't be able to bury his worries inside you until your body got a damn break.

"Do you mean between me and Steven and Jake?" Marc pointedly asked.

You dropped the butter knife. "W-what?" You squawked. "I haven't slept with Jake."

"But...you want to." Easing beside you, Marc leaned back against the kitchen counter. "Do you?"

You reallly should have spouted off a quick 'no'. But you hesitated.

"Shit," he groaned. "I shoulda known."

"I didn't say anything!" You protested, a little too innocently.

"Exactly," Marc huffed. "You didn't deny it."

"You kind of put me on the spot," you defended, retrieving the knife and returning to your task, furiously coating a slice of bread with five times too much butter. "Besides, Jake drives me crazy. If he climbs in the damn window again, I think I might shove him right back out."

"Ah, hell, it's worse than I thought," Marc grumbled, folding his toned arms over his chest in a distinct, defiant pout.

"How is it worse?" You scoffed. "And...what is worse?"

"You... him... shit," he sighed. "He got to you."

"He didn't," you protested. "Nothing happened. N-not really..." your voice trailed off as Marc's eyes flashed with possessiveness.

"Not really? I thought you said he didn't touch you. What the hell..." He paused, glancing at his reflection in the microwave.

"Is that Steven?" You interrupted, barging in to what you usually respected as private conversation between the boys. "What is he saying?"

Fixing his eyes back on you, Marc smirked triumphantly. "He's saying you look 'a bit flustered,' which would make sense, since you wore those black satin pj's and set your alarm just to see 'that mysterious bloke'."

"Steven, you are such a traitor!" You whined. "You guys are ganging up on me! I just wanted to talk to him."

"Mm-hmm," Marc hummed, caging you in against the counter with one arm on either side of your body. "So that's all you did - talk? In black satin? In the middle of the night?"

Narrowing your eyes, you called his bluff. "You guys are really obsessed with those pj's. Maybe you would have preferred I only wore your t-shirt? Or, I could have slept the way I sleep with you half the time - in nothing."

"Sure, mm-hmm," Marc playfully nodded down at you, mockingly agreeing with every word out of your mouth.

"Besides," you added, giving his chest a playful shove, "who knows how many times Jake has come home and found me like that - then slept beside me anyway?"

Marc went dead silent.

"I'm gonna kill him," he decided, waiting just a beat before scooping you up and throwing you over his shoulder, spinning you around the kitchen playfully. "First him..." you squealed as he tickled your side, feeling a mixture of giddiness and dizziness as he manhandled you, "then you. And then him again."

"Marc, put me down, put me down!" you giggled delightedly, banging your fists on his back.

After a few more twirls, and howls of laughter from you, he conceded, steadying you back against the counter. The two of you were smiling, breathless... his strong arms caged you in again as he wet his lips with his tongue.

Ducking down, he pressed his body into yours, breathing hotly against your open mouth.

"Promise me something..." he murmured, sucking on your bottom lip and swiping his tongue inside your mouth. He pulled back just a little, teasing you.

"What?" you impatiently demanded, chasing after his lips.

Sliding one hand around the back of your neck, he crushed his lips to yours, giving you what you really wanted. Gripping your jaw, he slid his tongue over yours, licking hotly as you groaned in satisfaction. You could never get tired of kissing this man.

"Promise me," he finally whispered, kissing the corner of your mouth, nuzzling your cheek with his nose. "Promise you'll tell me if something does happen - with Jake, I mean."

Easing back, he stared down into your eyes - his own warm, brown gaze pleading. "I know you don't have to. It-it's not my business, really, but..."

Sighing reluctantly, he poured his heart out to you. He knew he was safe with you - safe to show you what he really felt inside. "It's not like Steven," he admitted. "I don't know Jake. I just...I don't want anything to happen to you."

Nodding quickly, you reached up to caress his face. "Marc, of course. You're going to be my husband - of course I would tell you that."

"Really?" His eyes sparkled with relief and love.

"Yes, really," you sweetly whispered. "And I know there's no part of you that could ever hurt me."

After all that fuss with Steven and Marc, and the damn black satin pajamas, you actually thought you might see Jake again soon - particularly since he had finally introduced himself to his alters.

You thought wrong.

Jake went back to being Jake, not interacting with you or Marc or Steven, and the three of you were none the wiser about how he spent his time.

You couldn't wreck your entire sleep schedule just to look for him every night. He clearly had no intention of interacting with you during waking hours. You tried very hard not to take it personally. After all, you barely knew one another. But Steven and Marc could tell you thought of him...worried after him.

"I think you should wait up for him one night, love," Steven suggested one evening as you sat cuddled on the couch, reading together. London was being London again. The heavens had opened, dumping cold, wet rain for hours, and creating the perfect, candlelit night in for you and Steven.

Glancing over at your fiancé, so adorable in his oversized jumper, your eyebrows knit together questioningly. "You mean, set my alarm? 'Ambush' him again?"

Reaching up to pull his reading glasses off his nose, Steven shrugged. "Don't think it's much of an ambush, really. Just lovely you wanting to talk, is all. No harm in that."

Smiling warmly, you reached for his hand. "I don't think he sees me quite the way you do, my love."

"Not very bright then, is he? Running 'round at all hours for the old bird, missing the chance to come home to a wonder like you."

"Steven," you gasped, grinning at him. "Talking like that is going to bring an end to our night of reading very quickly."

"Fine by me, darling," he chuckled, tossing his book aside without even bothering to mark the page - something Steven never did. "Because I'm not the dimwitted bloke ignoring what's right in front of me." Scooting closer, he pulled you into his arms. "His loss is my gain, I'd say. Have you all the more to m'self."

So it was decided.

You would wait up for Jake (or wake up -whichever) to see if he wanted to interact with you, and ask how he was doing. It was possible, and in your mind, likely, that he didn't want to be a part of your life. But you wanted to hear it from his own mouth, especially since he slept beside you - in your bed, in your home.

Despite your general apprehension, you decided to be your most normal self and sleep (or in this case, stay awake) in one of Marc's white undershirts - they were so soft and smelled so deliciously like him. Steven's fuzzy goldfish socks found their way to your freezing feet.

You took a long nap and drank a huge cup of coffee (made perfectly by Marc) before bed. You were determined to stay up and see how Jake typically began his nighttime routine. He always ninja'd around like some sort of Father Christmas - waiting til everyone was completely asleep before darting in and out of the flat.

It would be your luck that Jake probably wouldn't even front tonight, and your caffeinated body would stare at your sleeping fiancé for the next several hours.

At first, it was difficult to resist cuddling up with your sleepy Steven. He did manage to adorably whine that he needed you, but you quickly reminded him that this was his idea.

"Just miss you 's all," he murmured, drifting off to dreamland.

You got bored very quickly. Steven had recommended a podcast called, 'Welcome to Staying Awake.' Finding some headphones, you tried it out, following the directions it suggested - reading, solving a puzzle, and so forth.

You were just starting to doze in the comfy chair in the bedroom's corner when your fiancé stirred...only to roll over and fall back asleep.

"Ugh..." you huffed, pushing off your chair to head to the kitchen. After a quick splash of water to the face and a long drink of water, you stumbled back to your bedroom...

...where you saw Steven? pulling a pair of tailored black trousers up his legs - his cozy pj's nowhere in sight. Fastening his pants, he turned around - shirtless - nodding once to acknowledge you.

"Jake?" You tentatively greeted, breaking the late-night silence.

"Hola, mi amor," Jake's rich, deep voice greeted you smoothly - his chocolate eyes flickering down to your bare legs. "I'm sorry I woke you."

"Jake," you exhaled shakily, easing toward him slowly. "You didn't wake me up. I was waiting for you."

Warmth bloomed in his chest, but he simply reached for his white dress shirt, quickly easing his arms into the sleeves and fastening the buttons.

"Where...do you keep your clothes?" you cautiously asked, inching closer.

Nodding to the closet, he remained quiet, knotting his tie and sitting down on the edge of the bed to pull on his socks and shoes. Khonshu had awakened him. Time to get to work.

"Where are you going?" you questioned after a few quiet moments watching him getting dressed.

Finishing the lacing of his shoes, he stood, reaching for his leather jacket. Realizing your question was not rhetorical, he granted you a slight smirk. "You know where."

"Can I come with you?" You blurted, already flustered. How did he manage to do this to you?

Narrowing his eyes, he shook his head, tutting a bit condescendingly. "You're not serious."

"I am," you insisted, scurrying over to the drawer to find some joggers for your bare legs. Of course, in this state, compared to Jake, you would be way underdressed. He looked head-to-toe incredible.

The faster you moved, trying to get dressed in enough presentable clothing to go out into the frigid rain, the slower Jake moved. But each action was nonchalant, as if he barely noticed your effort.

Why was he so damn infuriating? Then again, those were the exact words he'd said about you...

Pulling a leather glove over his long fingers, one dark eyebrow shot up inquisitively.

"Almost ready," you huffed, feeling like a child asking to go to work with a parent.

Realizing you were serious, Jake yanked on the second glove, giving his knuckles a crack. "Mi corazón..." he warned, pulling his flat cap over the lustrous curls on his head, and wondering what had gotten into you. You couldn't possibly think he would let you anywhere near his night life.

You were dressed now, in a weird mixture of your clothes and Marc's, but your goldfish-clad feet still poked adorably out of your joggers. Glancing all around the room, your eyes frantically searched for the nearest pair of shoes.

Approaching you confidently, Jake reached for your elbow, bringing you to a standstill. "I have to go. You should sleep."

Yanking your arm out of his grasp, you huffed. "I told you I don't respond well to orders."

Rubbing his gloved hand over the stubble on his chin, he nodded, "Goodnight," and turned to walk out of the bedroom.

"No, I'm coming with you, Jake, wait--"

"No, mi corazón. No." He whirled around, his gaze burning into yours.

"Why not?" you shot back, your hands landing on your hips. "You're going to work, right? I need to talk to you. And I want to see what you do."

He scoffed. "No. You don't."

"Stop telling me no," you snapped, realizing this whole stay-up-and-talk-to-Jake thing was already an unprecedented disaster. You simply could not keep your cool around this man.

"Ah, I see - I can't tell you what to do, but you can give me orders." Stalking back over to the night table, he reached for Marc and Steven's phone.

"I-I'm not giving you orders...I just- why can't I come with you?" You were desperate. You realized, at that moment, that alll this was not a good look on you. What happened to cool, calm and collected you? What happened to the you who respected the hell out of Marc and Steven's autonomy and choices?

You went so far as not even trying to dictate to Marc whether or not he should drink. It was his choice, always - it had to come from him. So why couldn't you do the same with Jake? You knew the drill - people were going to do what they decided to do. Arguing the point was only arguing with reality itself.

Sure, you could explain your fears or needs, and Jake could take that information into account. But ultimately, every person in the world always chose what they were going to choose - period, the end.

"I'm not taking you out there. You know it's not safe," he explained with infuriating calmness. "I'm not exactly working a normal job here."

"You mean...you mean Moon Knight. Like...saving people. Like you did with me that night."

His eyes flashed - you couldn't decipher if it was anger or surprise. "Marc told you."

"Yes," you answered softly, taking a moment to breathe in deeply. You had to calm down and stop sounding so desperate. "I just don't understand why you can follow me - why you can watch over me and save me, but you won't just talk to me." Your lip trembled as you started to realize he just may not ever want to be in your life.

"I thought you said that I was your family," you whispered, moving close to peer up into his eyes. "But you haven't talked to me in a week. I've been worried...I've been thinking about you."

Wetting his lips, Jake swallowed hard and shifted from one foot to the other - the first inkling that you were having any effect on him whatsoever. His dark eyes flickered down to yours. "I told you I can take care of myself," he gruffly responded, his resolve beginning to crack. "So stop worrying about me."

"Stop telling me what to do," you fired back, refusing to shrink away. "You're driving me crazy. If you don't want to talk to me, or know me - if you want to sneak in and out of here every night and never see me again, then just say so."

Your chest heaved with emotion. "I won't like it and I won't ever stop worrying about you, or wanting to know you, but --"

You didn't get to finish because Jake roughly pulled you into his arms and crushed his mouth to yours.

@stormydaysxx laaundromat @kindlover @spxctorsslxt @deezisnotreal

@rivalriotrenegade @wordacadabra this--is--music @i-still-dont-like-your-face 

idk if all the tags work. I tried!

[aguineapigcouldntdothis]

I do not find it reasonable that the term "ashkenormativity" is frequently used to mean "asheknazi jews, aka the white european ones, are racist, colorist, and even antisemitic against other jews". not only is that an improper definition with loads of information, it fails to recognize that the people who are most likely to perpetuate ashkenormativity are goyim.

for the purpose of this post, I will be going with the definition that ashkenormativity is the belief that ashkenazi people are the default jews, which leads to them getting more respect, opportunities, recognition, etc. goyim, especially in the western world, have likely only been exposed to ashkenazi jews, meaning that they are likely to view them as the blueprint. they are simply drawing conclusions from the available information, which in my eyes is not a huge issue. the true problem arises when they learn about other types of jews and immediately decide that we are "improper". because we don't fit their idea of what a jew looks like, acts like, etc., we are either bad jews or not jewish at all.

it is not the fault of ashkenazim that goyim think this way, and it is not their responsibility to fix it. it is also not their fault that most jews in the western world are ashkenazim. it is absolutely the responsibility of goyim to learn that there are many types of jew and we are still one people.

ashkenazim are less likely to spread ashkenormativity than goyim because they are exposed to other jews more often. they may have different norms than a sephardi, mizrahi, etc. jew would, but they're usually able to recognize that we are all jews with a shared culture. and by usually I mean I can count on 1 hand the number of times an ashki jew genuinely thought they were better than us. 2 hands if we're counting repeated offenses from the same person. I believe that has nothing to do with their heritage and everything to do with them being an asshole. point is, learning by observing other jews is an effective tool to combat prejudices. the more examples you see of a non-ashki jew, the more likely you are to correct yourself when you promote ashkenormativity.

i feel like a fun exercise would be to compare 2 separate interactions ive had with a goy and a ashkenazi jew. both contain examples of ashkenormativity. neither is significantly worse than the other so they are close enough to compare.

interaction with goy:

context is we were talking about jewish traditions and it got to the topic of food. I actually cooked a ton this year i didnt know what I was in for.

me: I won't cook that much this year, but usually id eat a lot of unleavened cakes and rice for passover

goy: i thought you guys ate matzah

me: I mean yeah but we eat other stuff too. im sephardi so I get more options which is fun (this was said as a joke, not judging anyone)

goy: oh so you're not really jewish then?

me: no im still jewish, Im just not ashkenazi and we have some cultural differences

goy: but like you're not jewish religiously, right??

me: I mean im not orthodox but yeah im still a religious jew. i just practice based on my culture its not hard to get

goy: wouldn't it be easier to just do what everyone else does though

me: yeah I just like doing this more it's fun for me

goy: yeah whatever I dont get this im done

interaction with ashki jew:

context is i was at shabbat dinner chilling on a couch and talking to a friend i made

ashki jew: so you know that shul down by (location)

me: the what?

ashki jew: ...the shul??

me: I've never heard that word in my life what is that

ashki jew: its just the synagogue. you've never heard that word before?

me: no i was so confused ive always just called it synagogue. sometimes the old people would call it kal never shul though

ashki jew: ok just like tell me if I confuse you with my yiddish again

I feel as if the differences between these interactions is quite clear. so, I wont go into heavy detail analyzing them. the basic idea is that during the conversation with the goy, I kept explaining myself and they refused to listen. they believed that ashki jews were better than me and that they themselves were also better than me. I was essentially told that I do not know anything about judaism because in their eyes I am not truly a jew. during the conversation with the ashkenazi jew, they explained themselves immediately because we are equals. they know we are both jews and we're more similar than we are different. it surprised them that I didn't know what shul meant, yet they did not use that as an excuse to tear me down.

I truly think people do ashkenazim a disservice by assuming that they are power hungry jews (*cough* antisemitic stereotype *cough*) who will stop at nothing to be better than the sad little sephardim and mizrahim. in reality, most of them, like my lovely friend, are more than willing to learn and share with other jews. the people who are truly hurting us are the goyische antisemites.

this is gonna sound hypocritical because I just made a long ass post about an intracommunity issue, however, can we please just focus the majority of our energy on the actual antisemites who are truly hurting us instead of other jews? this is an important topic that we need to discuss it's just not the most important thing us jews have going on. other jews are my friends and I refuse to be separated from them for the approval of goyim, and I know they will show me that same kindness.

note: I am just not feeling like myself today forgive any weird writing mistakes ill fix them later or maybe not

[deconstructingchabad]

Man, I'm kind of bummed Chabad turned out to be yet another high control cult that abuses its members. I'm a very very lapsed Jew trying to figure out what to do and while there are two synagogues near me, both are pretty much entirely descended from the initial handful of families that founded them in the 40s and 50s and not super welcoming of newbies. The only Jewish organization doing any sort of outreach or catchup courses is the local Chabad house. If they're gonna push any messianic crap though, I might as well just avoid them. I get enough of that crap from the Jews for Jesus newsletters around town. Oh well.

Yeah, it really sucks because I maintain that Chabad does provide an invaluable service to the Jewish community, often because it's the only resource available in many places (this is by design, often it'll outcompete other Jewish organizations and establishments). I wish there were other Jewish organizations with as much reach as Chabad that weren't culty and borderline idolatrous.

I will say though, in my personal opinion, if you have to choose between not being able to practice or connect with your Judaism, or use resources Chabad provides, I think you should choose using Chabad's resources, but going in there aware and taking a lot of what they say about "the Rebbe" with a grain of salt. I wouldn't want anyone to not have any lifeline to a Jewish community, especially now when antisemitism in on the rise and connection with other Jews is so important. I myself engage with the Chabad in my area not because I support them (I obviously don't), but because it's where I can go to see other Jews (who are not Chabadnikim, just regular Jews who use Chabad's services because it's the only place there is).

I know there's some Jews who would call for a total boycott of Chabad- these Jews are usually in a very large and connected Jewish community, like New York City or places in Israel- and those Jews are coming from a place of privilege to be able to say that. I don't think you or any other Jew should let their Judaism suffer, and if getting matzah from Chabad or going to services at Chabad is what you need to do- do it. Just go in there with the awareness of who they are and what they stand for. The congregants at outreach Chabad houses tend to not be Chabad themselves, anyway.

Have a wonderful Sukkot, Chag Sameach!

[shadowweaver06]

If you observe, I hope that you all had a lovely Rosh Hashanah. Mine was busy, to say the least. And the entirety of the chag was overshadowed by Oct 7th, which, while expected, did add a tint of melancholy to the holiday. I will admit, the level of the holiday being overshadowed by Oct 7th happenings by my shul was a bit offputting, to say the least, and I found myself feeling wrong-footed. Our rabbi talked about it both on Erev RH and during morning services on Thursday - and if I had been smart, I'd have heeded his disclaimer about the topical discussion of his sermon on Thursday morning before opting to sit through it. Instead, I did sit through his entire speech, and it left me feeling uncomfortable. Now - I've gotten pretty used to the array of feelings around what is happening with Israel and Gaza and whatnot. As much of a peacenik as I am, I still find myself vacillating between anger, grief, frustration, and rage, both about what happened on Oct 7th and what is still happening both to Israeli citizens and to other non-combatants unlucky enough to get caught in the way, and even more so now with Lebanon and Iran getting themselves involved in the fray.

Our Rabbi's discussion rehashed all the atrocities of last year (which I could have done without the reminder of... like we've all borne witness to it, repeatedly), and then veered off into congratulating the congregation for their increased Zionism. Which I found... weird. Like, sure, congratulate us for being more observantly Jewish and involved in our community, and engaged in doing mitzvot, but congratulating us for an ideology just seems... I don't know, odd? I just found it troubling, and it was not the type of message I expect to hear during a holiday sermon I guess - I expected more of a hopeful, 'dawn of a new year' message. (I will admit, this is my first time spending HHD at a Conservative shul, so maybe this is the norm and I'm just not used to it, I don't know). It was also heavily flavored with some us-vs-them rhetoric, which I also did not care for. (Ultimately, though, I very much lack the generational trauma of my co-religionists (I was not raised as a Jew), so I expect that lack of trauma is strongly flavoring my view on things). I don't begrudge people for feeling the way they feel - it's certainly valid. I suppose this is a lot of what the congregation here wants to hear, which is why he wrote it, but... I don't know if it was what I needed to hear in that moment. Like I'd already been reflecting on the last year and what we've lost as a community as I was praying - and having that note layered on top of it made it feel even more bitter. 2nd day was better - but we joined our friends with their kids for the family service, which was shorter and more interactive (since we're the only other folks they know at this shul, they asked us to be with them so they didn't feel so abnormal, since they are new to this shul as well). We went to a RH party thrown by a friend on 2nd night - we catered the majority of the food (we smoked an enormous brisket, I made gluten free challah and regular challah with rasins, and apple honey cake, vegetarian matzah ball soup, and diri djon djon (it's our little taste of Haiti - and a staple of our shabbat table, which is usually a mix of Kosher-fied Haitian or lebanese/middle eastern dishes). On Friday evening I had company over for Shabbat - my friends (who aren't Jewish) came with their daughter and one of our other Jewish friends who needed a break from her kids came by, and I made an absolutely amazing pomegranate molasses roasted chicken recipe, ktiztzot with leeks and swiss chard, roasted squash and root vegetables, glazed carrots, a tossed salad, and a really tasty herb salad with apples and pomegranate seeds (which I am absolutely making again for Sukkot because it was amazing). Saturday night after Havdalah, we walked down the street and made an appearance at my best friend's birthday party, and I am 98% certain that I ate my body weight in tacos. Yesterday I woke up with a terrible cold. And now I'm sitting in bed typing this after waking up for the second time today after sleeping for 99% of yesterday, and a good chunk of the day today. So yeah. That's been the last week or so in a nutshell. Still feeling rather off-kilter given that it's the Oct 7th anniversary, and I sometimes feel like as a convert, my opinion doesn't really matter on these things - I don't have family ties to Israel, just religious/emotional/theoretical ties, so it's something I don't really feel like I sometimes have a right to have an opinion on, because so many other people do, and have lost someone either to the violence on the 7th, or to subsequent skirmishes. It's just a weird, somber, and reflective time, and I'm spending my day praying for an end to the cycle of violence, and for something approaching lasting peace for folks who live there. If nothing else, that is something I can do, and don't need to voice a personal opinion on.

(Forgive me my rambling - I'm all manner of doped up on cold medicine).

[cainluvr69]

Surely, We Can Make Miracles Chapter 23

Previous Chapter

Cain: …kh…

Chloe: I can't…breathe…

Hwylryn: Of course not. This is the bottom of the ocean. Children of man aren't meant to live here. So can you hurry back to land already? Anyway… I guess I should be getting back to Shylock now.

Rustica: …My apologies, but… I'd like you to accompany us for just a bit longer. <Amo…> …gh!

Chloe: Rustica…!

Hwylryn: Nope, you don't get to do that. Your singing makes me start daydreaming. The next whirlpool is going to take you right up to the surface. Don't try to fight it. It's pointless. And it'll only rip you up.

Rutile: …Hwylryn…! Please, listen to what I have to say…

Hwylryn: I'll see you tomorrow. On land. Now withdraw.

Cain: …I won't…let you…! Uwaaahhh…!

Rutile: Aaahhh…!

Rustica: …Chloe…!

Chloe: Rus… Everyone…!

Natalie?: <Cure Memini>

Hwylryn: …Oh, my.

Cain: …You…you're… The lady from earlier…?!

Natalie?: … Excuse me…?

Cain: You were really a wizard?!

Natalie?: Excuse me? The fact that you can see me should give you all the answers you need.

Cain: …Huh? I mean, we got pretty touchy-feely earlier.

Natalie?: We did?

Cain: Huh?

Natalie?: Hah?

Cain: …You're Owen!

Natalie?: Sir Knight. Don't tell me you did something unbecoming of a knight to this woman.

Cain: Of course I didn't! I just didn't have a handkerchief, so…

Owen: You don't even have something like that? Chloe, can you believe this. Cain doesn't have a handkerchief.

Chloe: …sniff…Owen…

Owen: Heh. What, did this guy make you cry? What a wretched sea snake you are.

Hwylryn: Oho. Something interesting showed up.

Owen: I'm going to turn you into dog food. <Cuare Morito>

Hwylryn: I don't think that little puppy's tummy can fit me.

Owen: …kh… (This guy is…strong…!)

✦✧☾✧✦

Lennox?: …!

Faust: … (Leno's moving his arms the same way the mermaids with spears did, now that he has one at hand…)

Shino: Faust, watch out! Lennox is good with a lance!

Faust: …I know that…!

Lennox?: …!

Faust: …Waugh…!

Heathcliff: Mr. Faust…! (He forced Faust against the reef, and now he's lifting his spear…!) (He's going to stab him…!) Lennox, stop! Please, don't hurt him…!

Lennox?: …

Heathcliff: …He stopped…

Shino: Lennox…

Faust: … …Leno…

Lennox?: …… …Lord…st…

Faust: …! Leno…!

Lennox?: …!

Faust: …?!

Shino: Stop, Lennox! Don't hurt him…! You'll regret it until the day you die if you do…!

Lennox?: … ……. …

Shino: You can't! Put the lance down…!

Lennox?: …!

Faust: Leno?! Why did you stab your own leg…?! Stop! Stop, let go of it…!

Lennox: …gh…

Faust: Leno! Leno…! Stop it, your leg's already hurt enough…!

Lennox: …Fau…st… …Lord Faust…

Faust: …Leno…

Heathcliff: Mr. Faust! We finished the circle!

Shino: All we need to do is scatter the firstlight salt… Done! <Matzah Sudipas>!

Heathcliff: <Repsev Aivulp Sunos>!

Faust: … <Salliuqnart Mulcredo>!

✦✧☾✧✦

Lennox: Hah… …Haah… …

Faust: Leno…!

Lennox: …Lord Faust… Woah…!

Faust: …I'm so glad you're okay… Alec told me your unit might have been completely wiped out…

Lennox: Several others survived as well. Things seemed hopeless, but we still managed to return alive.

Faust: Thank god…

Lennox: …

Faust: …What's wrong?

Lennox: I'm just surprised.

Faust: By what?

Lennox: I didn't think that you'd jump on me the same way Lord Alec does.

Faust: Sorry. Are you hurt anywhere?

Lennox: No. …Haha…

Faust: What…? I don't hear you laugh very often…

Lennox: Haha… I could say the same to you.

Faust: I do laugh. More than you, at least.

Lennox: That's true…

Faust: …Haha…

Lennox: Ahaha!

✦✧☾✧✦

Lennox: … …That's right… …I'd forgotten… I found him, Courir. I found the person I'd been looking for. I need to go to him. I'm glad I got to see you again. You always trusted me. And you were always by my side. I never really spoiled you, but you still always slept next to me. I love you very, very much. And having to part with you hurts very, very much. But, I need to… Goodbye. I love you. Goodbye, Courir. I hope you can run freely as far as you want. Thank you.

✦✧☾✧✦

Faust: …Leno… Leno…!

Lennox: … …Lord Faust… Woah…!

Faust: …Thank goodness…

Lennox: …

Faust: …Sorry. I did that when I know you're injured…

Lennox: No… …Haha…

Faust: …Are you okay? He's not controlling you anymore?

Lennox: No… I should be fine now.

Shino: Lennox, are you okay?!

Heathcliff: Lennox! Do you know who we are?!

Lennox: Yes, I do. I do know. … I can't clearly recall what happened, but I'm sorry for putting you through so much trouble…

Faust: Don't say that… Let me look at your wounds. Give me your leg…

Lennox: …

Faust: Lennox…?!

Shino: Did he pass out?!

Faust: He must be completely exhausted. I should get him out of the ocean as soon as possible. The two of you must be at your limits, too.

Heathcliff: You're right… I still feel okay for right now, though.

Faust: Shino, Heathcliff.

Shino: What.

Heathcliff: What is it?

Faust: This was only possible because of the two of you. Thank you.

Shino & Heathcliff: …!

Shino: Heh, yeah!

Heathcliff: It's an honor!

Faust: Let's return to the water's surface. Vespa, can you show us the path up?

Vespa: …! …!

Heathcliff: Let's go, Shino!

Shino: Yeah!

✦✧☾✧✦

Owen: <Cure Memini>

Hwylryn: Ahaha! This is fun!

Owen: …tsk!

Rustica: I'll support you! <Amores Viesse>

Hwylryn: You're kind of annoying.

Rustica: …cough…!

Chloe: Rustica!

Rustica: ……!

Rutile: Rustica…!

Rustica: …

Rutile: Oh no…! Rustica isn't breathing!

Chloe: What do we do…?! Rustica! Rustica!

Rutile: We need to bring him to the surface!

Owen: Then get on with it. Or else your teacher's gonna turn to stone!

Chloe: But…!

Owen: Whatever, just go. You're at your limit.

Chloe: Owen…

Owen: Tch… Yeah, that was stupid. You're going to die here. Just like I thought you would.

Cain: Go, Chloe! I've got things covered here!

Rutile: I'll stay, too! Please look after Rustica for us!

Chloe: …Okay…! Thank you…! (I need to hurry! I need to hurry!) (I'm definitely going to save you, Rustica!)

Owen: Hmph… And what do the two of you think you can do?

Cain: Swordplay and magic.

Rutile: I can heal, and fly very, very fast.

Owen: Lame… Just so you know, if I die, the two of you have exactly zero chance of winning. So if I die, just run.

Cain: … No, I won't.

Rutile: I won't, either.

Owen: Super lame…

Hwylryn: Are you guys ready yet?

Owen: The lamest one here is you.

Hwylryn: I like your dog!

Owen: Shut up. <Cure Memini>

Hwylryn: Let's play.

✦✧☾✧✦

Torta di Cocco Shopkeeper: Here, it's finished baking.

Riquet: Wahh, it looks so tasty!

Mitile: It smelled so good while it was in the oven!

Nero: Hmm… Y'think you could teach me the recipe?

Mithra: Is it done? Can I take it to the bottom of the sea now?

Mitile: N-not yet! It needs the cream and coconut on top first.

Mithra: Then can you hurry, at least?

Mitile: If you could, please!

Torta di Cocco Shopkeeper: Yes, of course.

Claudia: My, what a delicious-looking cake.

Riquet: Yes! Thank you for being willing us to let us have your cake so we could know how it tastes. I'm incredibly grateful.

Claudia: My, what a good boy you are. I'm happy I could meet you boys again, in fact. It sounds like you've helped Dianne out a lot, too.

Riquet: How is Dianne doing…?

Nero: She's talkin' to Bradley right now.

Riquet: Did she ask Bradley to help her?

Nero: Uh, somethin' like that.

Riquet: Thank goodness. She seemed to be having a very difficult time, and Bradley can be a very helpful person.

Nero: …True that.

Claudia: Both I and my sister should have realized how much Dianne was hurting so much faster than we did… No, I'm sure my sister knew. That must be why she tried to turn that story into a heartwarming tale, to try and take her pain away. But instead, that simply made Dianne feel like no one would protect her honor…

Riquet: It's a very complicated problem. Even with so much love and kindness given to her, her pain prevented her from finding her path… Guiding people is a very difficult prospect. It's important to carefully ascertain if what lies at the end of the path you lead them down will truly be good or not… Wanting someone to walk down a path is very similar to forcing them to think and act a particular way. It's frightening. I wonder what Bradley is telling her? Do you think it'd be okay if I listened in?

Nero: Nahh, that's prob'ly not a good idea. I don't think her Lordship would wanna have anyone eavesdroppin'.

Riquet: I suppose you're right…

Mithra: Excuuuuse meeee. We don't have any time to chat like this.

Nero: I know, man. Just wait a lil' bit longer. Actually, speakin' of, Claudia. There was somethin' I wanted to ask you about the disappearances…

Claudia: Yes, I suppose I'll spill the beans. I've seen a door through which I could see the past on the island's shore. I can't help but wonder if that door isn't related to the disappearances.

Riquet: A door to the past… That story we heard was real? Did you really see the past?

Claudia: No, it was just an illusion.

Mitile: What kind of illusion did you see?

Claudia: A man I fell in love with many years ago stepped through it and told me he loved me.

Mitile: I… I see.

Claudia: But he'd never said those words to me before, not even once. It was very obvious it was just an illusion. We had a good relationship, and he was a good friend. But though I fell in love with him, his status was far too high… He already had a fiancee before we even met. And yet, here is what I thought to myself. Perhaps if I open that door, I can see him again… Were it twenty years earlier, I imagine I would've found myself drawn to that door despite myself.

Riquet: Why not now?

Claudia: Because the paint I drew up my dream with has long since dried.

Riquet: You painted your dream…?

Claudia: The things that make your heart tremble and dance are what make your dreams shine so brightly, like light on a freshly-painted canvas. He was the one who said that to me. The paint of my dream has dried, and my heart has calmed down and put itself in its place, and so… I can't go back to such fresh and youthful excitement, not when I'm so afraid of so much as brushing against it, much less taking it into my hands directly. It's like appreciating how a cake is decorated before demolishing it with your fork, to put it another way.

Riquet: I…think I understand…

Claudia: Because the paint of my dream had already dried, and left it calm and quiet, hearing him say that didn't make my heart dance. It was an odd feeling, both lonely and relieving at the same time.

Riquet: Like looking at your plate after you've finished your cake?

Claudia: Yes. It's not like being scared of destroying something, but more like having properly eaten and savored it instead. But Dianne's dreams are still bright. They're delicate, strong, and still gasping for air. Just like fresh paint on a canvas. The idea of touching them before they're ready and smudging their colors into one she doesn't want, polluting her canvas forever, is terrifying. That's how it feels, looking at the beautiful, vivid scenery she's painted. It's as if time has stopped in place.

✦✧☾✧✦

Lennox: …ah…

Faust: Leno, are you okay? I'm going to get you to the surface soon. Just hold on tight to me.

Lennox: …Yes…Lord Faust…

✦✧☾✧✦

Dianne: …What do you mean by throwing away my fear? Are you going to cast a spell on me?

Bradley: …

Dianne: Or are you planning on providing counsel? How am I meant to do this without trembling?

Bradley: What do you think? We're here to talk about you, girl.

Dianne: …What is there to talk about…? … …Things always go so well in my imagination. …I can always make the best, safest decision for everyone, without making a single mistake in the process. I've worked ever since I was a child to become that kind of person. And yet, this is what happens instead… I'm sure my grandfather would be disappointed in me. …I'm so pathetic…

Bradley: Y'don't have to change who you are. Y'don't have to be someone you aren't.

Dianne: …But if they knew about the real me, they'd all laugh… I don't want them to laugh at me…I'm weak, and pitiful…and embarrassing…

Bradley: 'Course you don't. Who wants to be turned into a laughingstock? But I won't laugh at you. You're tryin' to fulfill your responsibilities, and that's why you're standin' here.

Dianne: …

Bradley: You good? I've got something I used to say to newbies right after they joined up, to get 'em to throw away their fear.

Dianne: Newbies…? Were you the leader of some kind of organization?

Bradley: Yeah, a bandit gang. That's why I'm a prisoner now. Still wanna hear what I have to say?

Dianne: …Yes… I want to hear you out. Please, tell me.

Bradley: Alright. Everyone's experiences protect 'em, no matter what that experience is. Failures, successes, all of 'em do the same thing. But newbies like you don't have any experience to protect yourself with. And at times like that, when y'don't have any foundation to prop yourself up with, you start doin' weird shit like this. Y'start thinkin' that if you don't protect your honor all on your own, you won't have a place to belong anymore. Even though you don't know right from left yet. So, here's what I tell 'em. You ready to jot this down? I'll protect you. I'll protect your life, your honor, your perspective. So you need to protect your comrades.

Dianne: …

Bradley: Dianne. You're about to walk out that gate and talk to the crowd, yeah?

Dianne: Yes.

Bradley: If for whatever reason you can't do it, I'll talk for you. And I'll hold that position 'til you're ready to take it from me. If anyone tries to jump on you, I'll protect you from 'em. But I've got a feelin' you'll be able to do just fine without me havin' to do a damn thing.

Dianne: …

Bradley: Remember. You're the lord of this whole big-ass castle. That ain't your average job. And you were the one who made it there. Have more faith in yourself. Anythin' else you're scared of?

Dianne: … I…don't think so… Why not…? I was so scared, but now…

Bradley: Don't hold back now. If there's anythin' worryin' you, just say it.

Dianne: … You're not lying? You're not going to betray me…?

Bradley: 'Course not. Hell, if people found out I turned on a little lass like you, that'd just make me more infamous and not in a good way. I'm not gonna betray you, Dianne. On my honor, I'll protect your honor. Now step forward. The first step's always the scariest. The rest'll be a piece of cake. Don't be scared. I'm right next to you.

Dianne: …sniff…okay… …I understand. I'm going now!

Bradley: Hell yeah! You got this!

Next Chapter

[mrsaguapapi]

Ch 1  Ch 2  Ch 3  Ch 4  Ch 5  Ch 6  Ch 7  Ch 8  Ch 9  Ch 10

Chapter 11

Every Stitch

The Vibe:

Donovan - Season of the Witch (Official Audio)

What time is it?

I check my phone and it's 7:55 pm "Fuck" I curse at myself. I decided a couple of hours ago to give up on trying to read my mother's books until I met up with Steven later. Instead, I took some time to relax and watched some Netflix... I may have eaten 2 slices of week-old pizza too

I grab an oversized Vegeta t-shirt and half-tuck it into a pair of jeans. Quickly I scan myself in the mirror putting my braids half up in a bun and wiping away any pizza crust from my face. I slide on a pair of sneakers, grab my sling ring and open a portal to their place. I take the two books in one hand, a bottle of wine in the other, and step through closing the portal behind me.

Steven was in his little kitchen cooking something on the stove, wearing an apron and a pair of dark jeans. That was it no shirt, no shoes; it was quite the sight. His dark curly hair fell nicely on the side of his face, sometimes I forget how fine they are.

I drop the books on his bed and walk up to him, "What's for dinner love?" I ask

"Matzah Ball soup" he smiles," Here, set the table you're just in time." I do as he says and grab a couple of plates and utensils. After setting the table I have a seat while Steven serves our plates and takes the seat next to me. "Eat up," he says

I take a bite and almost cry, "Steven this is amazing."

"Thank you" he blushes," It's not as good as I remember; we used to make this with our Mother and brother. Brings good memories." he smiles, "Alright fill me in, the old fashion way. Your Memory Transference gives us a headache, besides I like hearing your voice."

I can't help but smile, he's incredibly sweet. For the next 20 min, I fill him in on what I can, leaving out all the parts involving Namor and the Talokans. I won't go into too much detail as I'm still processing but I give him all the important bits.

"Are you okay? You seem out of it." Steven placed his hand on mine

I sigh, "I will be you know? Got a lot to process. I left out a few details of the trauma." I laugh "Um I also kind of met someone. It's REALLY complicated and new, nothing's labeled officially I think? I don't know." I laugh nervously, "He's honestly quite sweet, I'd tell you more but I would be breaking a pretty important promise."

"That was extremely vague" He laughs, "But I'm happy for you"

"So tell me about Layla?" I ask

"Not much to tell. Marc called her and asked if she wanted to get dinner with us and talk. She agreed, so hopefully, all goes well. We're nervous"

"Don't be, you'll be fine. Bring her flowers it'll help break the tension."

"I don't know, I don't think she like flowers" he begins

"Let me stop you there young Padawan. Women love flowers. We don't say anything because we don't want to have to ask for them. That's like rule number one"

"Duly Noted" he laughs "thank you, Mills."

"No problem" I smile," Steven I don't think I can focus on anything until you put a shirt on."

He laughs at me and nods his head. I get up and clear the table while Steven grabs a shirt to put on and looks at the books on the bed, "So are these them?"

"Yes," I say walking over to him, "I can only make out certain words, makes no sense to me"

Steven inspects both books, looking at the bind and the pages trying to read the writing, "I'm honestly lost too. It's all gibberish."

"That's because it's written in the elder gods' native tongue," Khonshu says appearing from nowhere scaring both of us.

"A little warning next time bird brain?" Steven responds

"Hello child, made up your mind about my offer," Khonshu asks, I roll my eyes and look at Steven

"Oi bird man, you know she's not here for that." Steven says, "Can you help with the books or not?"

"This is what I get for picking a defected avatar," he whispers to himself. He points his staff at the books, "That's the book of Oshtur, goddess of truth, justice, and cosmic order. The other one looks like the book of Ayesha, the Rain Queen of Balobedu, a former sorceress supreme. These have been lost for centuries, where did you find them?"

"My mother had them in Wakanda."

"Who's your mother girl?"

"Apparently former Queen Ororo of Wakanda"

"The lost Windrider?" he asks shocked, "She's your mother?"

I clear my throat a little uncomfy "Yea seems so. I'm assuming by your reaction you were a fan" I chuckle awkwardly

"Something like that. It's beginning to make sense why she has these books and why you can see me. Your bloodline is closely connected to Oshtur, Steven you may know her as Ma'at" Khonshu says

I have a seat on the bed, "Who is Oshtur, and connected how?"

"Read it yourself," Khonshu says with an attitude

"We can't," I say matching his energy

He shakes his head and holds out his staff, "Grab on" Hesitantly I do as he says and Steven follows. I feel a rush of energy travel through my body giving me a headrush.

We quickly remove our hands from the staff, "What the hell was that?" I ask

"I just gave you the power of, Allspeak now you can communicate and read in all languages of the Nine Realms, Earth's dialects, alien languages, etc. You should have no problem reading those books. Now I shall take my leave." And like that he was gone.

"Allspeak? No way", Steven whispers to himself

"Geez, he was in a mood." I snicker and grab the books, "Grab the wine and sit, we got some reading to do" I take my shoes off and crawl up to the head of the bed.

Steven pours himself a glass and hands me the bottle. In return, I give him a book and we begin to read.

-----------------

For the last few hours, I've been reading about the goddess Oshtur. She is- was?-one of the primordial gods. I am unclear if she is alive or dead.

Can a primordial god die?

Oshtur had a fascination with the realms beyond Earth; so much so that she took to the heavens to travel the stars. During her exploration, Oshtur met a being named Hoggoth, the last survivor of an ancient mystic race.

Okay slay

They learned a great deal from one another, and when Oshtur was ready to move on, Hoggoth offered to go with her. The two eventually traveled back to Earth, where Oshtur cared for the development of mankind.

One day, she observed three children at play, and their joy caused her to shed a single tear. A child of her own emerged from that tear, and Oshtur named him Agamotto.

Agamotto loved to learn, and the two were quite happy together. Agamotto grew into a great teacher and sorcerer, who loved humanity as much as his mother. They eventually joined with Hoggoth to become a mystical trinity known as the Vishanti, and Agamotto encouraged the study of magic in humanity through his writings in the Book of the Vishanti.

Agamotto became the first Sorcerer Supreme of the Earth. He occasionally tried to choose a successor but to no avail. With no luck in his search, he held a battle between all of Earth's mightiest mages to determine the next Sorcerer Supreme. In the end, Ayesha a mighty sorceress from the Kingdom of Balobedu emerged as the champion. She served as Sorcerer Supreme for nearly 4000 years.

Ayesha now the protector of Earth was gifted with the control of Nature and Oshturs Power. Oshturs power is most frequently invoked for spells of strength, providing some power to make an existing spell even more powerful or to strengthen the magician casting it. Ayesha's gifts were passed to her descendants, all women with white hair and powerful magic potential.

I dramatically close the book, "Ayesha is my ancestor."

"I know. At the end of her book, there is a detailed family tree, that I'm assuming your ancestors kept up with. You're the last name here." Steven points at my name and hands me the book, "Outside of that there are all kinds of spells and abilities unlocked by your ancestors: Curative healing, flight, chaos magic, etc. I think your bloodline was blessed with generational bestowment of power. This book is a dummies guide for your potential powers."

"The journal that was bound to my wrist is just like this. Weird, how on some innate part of me I had the urge to document my gifts just like my ancestors."

"You need to add your findings to this book, there are blank pages meant for you"

"Yea, I suppose so." I put the books down and rub my head "So I know my family's origin story and now I have the cheat codes to my power. You'd think I'd be satisfied, but now I find myself grieving for parents I never knew and a past I have forgotten. Somehow it feels all connected."

"I'm sorry love, is there anything I can do?" Steven asks

"No hun, you've done quite enough. Thank you for your help tonight." I check my phone and see it's well past 2 am "I should go" I give Steven a big hug

"I'll see ya soon?" he asks, "Might need you to talk us off the ledge if things go wrong with Layla." he chuckles

I stand up and begin to open a portal "You are so dramatic," I laugh grabbing my books," And yes, of course, call or text me whenever okay?"

"Of course." He waves at me as I step through to my bedroom closing the portal behind me. 

------------------------

I lay in bed thinking about what my next move is. I need to take a trip to Bleeker street tomorrow; with the Darkhold's connection to my mother and now my bloodlines ties to the Sorcerer supremes, it's the right time to loop in Strange & Wong. Maybe they can help with my memory, but considering what happened with peter I have my reservations. Also, 

Who is Agatha? How does she play into this? 

Leaving all of my questions behind, I pull my phone out and begin to scroll through Tik Tok and unwind from the day. Right before I put my phone down to go to sleep, I receive a text from bucky

3:12 am

Hey, Can we talk? I'd really like to see you.

                                                  Read

I turn the sound off, put my phone face down on the nightstand, and lay back, "Nope. That's a future me problem."

[smile-files]

So you have any headcanons for clover or any other iii character?

oooh yes!!!! i have been over some of these before... i mainly have headcanons for characters i kin, so clover especially!!!!! i might have headcanons for other ii3 characters but if i do i don't remember them lol

some (of my many) clover headcanons:

ace. arospec? like that weird thing i described, where she gets crushes but can just turn them off. biromantic :)

she/they. weird girl-adjacent gender

ashkenazi jewish (basically canon because 1. matzah ball soup and 2. i said so)

autism B))) special interest is lepidopterology (just like me for real)

i have the feeling their family is super unlucky and they're the one anomaly who ended up with luck

listens to rock music!!!!!!!!!!!!

avid badminton player :D

favorite colors are pink and yellow! also kins fluttershy from mlp. these two facts are totally unrelated

lots of people get crushes on her, or at least she thinks they do (she particularly thinks nickel likes her which he very much does not)

loooooves watermelon :]

since the box incident they've been pretty anxious - not for themselves, but for other people. they worry a lot about how their actions affect those around them

mary sue (affectionate)

some kind of inferiority-superiority complex/impostor syndrome. believes everyone loves her and that the world loves her (which in a way they do) but thinks she doesn't deserve it at all

friendly but shy. if you know what i mean. will not approach you but will talk to you if you approach them

daydreams and doodles a lot

loves to sing and play ukulele :DD

jack of all trades, master of none... (or so they think)

has never been sick/injured in her life (besides that one time she died)

wants to make the world a better and happier place!! wants everyone to be as lucky as they are!!! (go cheer factory!!!!!) <3

teenager. she's my age :)

has a flip phone. lol

gets inspired whenever they see anyone do anything at all

weird popular quiet art nerd kid at school. you know

gumi megpoid...

wants to be in a band

loves to skip and spin around!!! full of whimsy and joy

has never cursed and never will

doesn't know what to think about cabby and silver spoon. she relates to them? but also kind of dislikes them? but also kind of has crushes on them sometimes??

can't stand the cold

they don't celebrate easter but it's their favorite non-jewish holiday

doesn't celebrate st. patrick's day either. just thinks people are celebrating her lololol (i imagine her birthday is then but it works either way)

drinks milk a lot. like a lot. certified milk enjoyer

often talks in a babyish voice when with people she's comfortable with

yeah those are the ones i can think of right now B)) for some reason i feel lightheaded now B)))) lol

[neverwritewhatyouknow]

hello hello~ i saw your post about rw&b from another blog and decided to give your blog a look through. i just wanted to say really thank you for bringing these representation issues to the conversation, even if it's tiring and hard :')

i thought about it and i really could only name a few characters on tv that i've seen recently who were jewish (jake/gina from b99 and dr. taub from house md). as a jew, even nonreligious like many of us are, the culture is still such an important part of the community, and yet none of us really get to see this representation on screen - especially minorities within the jewish minority (i have a friend who's half chinese half jewish for ex).

i didn't grow up with religion (we only celebrated passover sometimes and we usually forgot to light the hanukkah candles after day 3), but we ate latkes and matzah and hamantashen and my mom and grandparents (also nonreligious jews) regularly used yiddish words like schlep and schmutz which I didn't know wasn't normal until i had college friends ask me what they meant.

anyway this ask doesn't really have a point but i'm really glad to see that this kind of issue is being talked about at some level, especially as you've seen, it keeps getting denied and pushed down (like saying having a jewish producer on a movie means we shouldn't have jewish actors??? wtf). even though i haven't experienced much discrimination myself (i don't have an easily identifiable/stereotypical jewish name or appearance) many many people have (for literally thousands of years) and there's so much antisemitism in our society. it's exhausting seeing it, hearing about it, reading it in books, etc. sorry for the very long message but sending much love and gratitude <3<3 you're amazing

Thank you so much for this!!!

I was just talking to someone else about Jake from Brooklyn 99, I’m gonna watch the show because everyone keeps telling me great things! And Taub… yikes… his character isn’t bad, but man do they really use his Jewishness as a punchline sometimes, granted House does it with everyone, but it feels more offensive with Taub. Dr Cuddy in House is Jewish too, played by Lisa Edelstein. But that was more of the case that she was Jewish and they let her character be too. But yeah, Jewish rep is such a small fraction of characters, and meaningful Jewish rep even more so.

There will be “Jewish” TV shows like The Goldbergs or Maisel, and people consider that rep… but 1. There are almost no Jewish actors in either of those shows, 2. Heavily stereotyped, 3. If the only time you can see more than one of two Jews on screen is in a show that is about Jews… It’s still othering Jews by literally putting them into a different show. I can easily name more than a dozen shows with no Jewish characters, which is just so terrible. Especially because there are so many different Jews in the world. Not every Jew is from New York and speaking Yiddish. There’s an entire other type of Judaism called Sephardic Judaism and there’s almost no rep there. Plus, there is barely any rep for Jews of color (especially played by Jews of color). I also have a friend who’s Jewish and Chinese, apparently that’s a super huge sector… yet, I can’t remember the last time I ever saw that represented by an actor who is. Sorry, little rant.

I love hearing about people’s Jewish upbringing, because there’s such a diverse range in the way people live their Jewish lives, and it doesn’t make any Jew more or less Jewish than another. I’m really glad you’ve never been discriminated against, like honest to god that makes me so happy. I’m the total opposite. Nearly been killed and attacked a handful of times, so any time another Jew tells me they’re able to live without worrying for their life, it makes me so happy and hopeful that maybe one day we all can. Probably a big hope lol, but maybe.

And yeah, Jewish representation is something that people don’t wanna hear about, because it would require people to understand more about Judaism and Jewishness, and due to history/society/culture, many think they already know everything and learning more would make them reevaluate things. And many don’t want to.

Thanks again for your message, Anon! Great to hear from you!!

[wahlpaper]

The Matzah Ball Review

The Matzah Ball by Jean Meltzer

CW: Child/Family Abandonment, Death of a Parent, Cancer, Grief, Described Chronic Illnesses, Shame, Ableism, Internalized Ableism, Internet Bullying, Mention of Infidelity, Antisemitism, Discussion of the Holocaust, Breach of Privacy, Drunkenness, Suicidal Thoughts

4.5/5

Being a popular book amongst romance readers, I have no idea how I first came across The Matzah Ball by Jean Meltzer. It came out in 2021 and I've wanted to read it since. I tend to pick out books that don't have a waitlist on Libby as it can be overwhelming when the books end up coming in all at once. It's because of this that I took a while to get to The Matzah Ball, and even longer because I decided I'd read it for Hannukka 2023. I'm so happy that I finally got to read it. Meltzer is a wonderful author!

Rachel Rubinstein-Goldblatt is the daughter of a popular rabbi and a successful doctor. She's been raised to be the perfect Jewish woman, often reminded that the synagogue of over 1000 families is always watching. She's kept her secrets close to her chest; that she has Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and that she loves Christmas. Needing a job that allows her to work from home, she became a successful Christmas romance writer. Unfortunately, this Hannukka, her world is going to be sent spinning like a dreidel. Her publisher tells her to write a Hannukka novel in the same week that her middle school boyfriend, Jacob, comes back to New York. Though they would love to avoid each other, they'll be forced to air out their grudges as they prep for the Matzah Ball together. 

This book knows exactly who its audience is. It's accessible for both Jews and non-Jews. The book takes the time to explain certain things that are pretty basic, like sufganiyot, the fact that Hannukka isn't a major holiday, that the 10 Commandments were received at Mt. Sinai, and more. These are for the non-Jewish readers. The book also has plenty of things that are treated as a part of life, like knowing what the Berkshires are, using two sets of table/cookware, and many Yiddish words. One of my favorite Jewish moments in the book is when Jacob is setting up the menorah and has to melt the bottoms of the candles to get them to stick. My family does this too and it filled me with glee to hear it described. I appreciate that The Matzah Ball was written mostly for a Jewish audience without alienating any other readers. 

If you enjoy tropes and trope analysis, this is definitely the Hannukka romance for you. The Matzah Ball isn't just a holiday romance novel, it's about holiday romance novels. If at times it feels a little cheesy, unrealistic, or rushed, there's a reason for it. These are important elements of the sub-genre. You can have the romantic tropes featured, enemies-to-lovers and second-chance romance, in any romance sub-genre, but there are certain elements that make this a holiday romance. Obviously, it has to take place during a Festival of Lights holiday and there has to be snow, it also should take place (at least partially) in a big city like New York, each love interest should have just one friend, and they should be in love within an extraordinarily low number of days. Meltzer has set up Rachel to be a writer, a hint to the audience that everything tropey/cliche is intentional. 

I'd have loved this book even if it was just a fluffy Hannukka romcom, but it is more than that. The Matzah Ball features a main character who is surviving through a chronic illness and a love interest who was raised by a chronically ill single mom. I face my own chronic illnesses, fibromyalgia and IBS, so I always appreciate when a book explores what it's like to have one. Even better if the character is Jewish. Rachel has a best friend and family that care about and support her, but she has so much shame about her CFS that she has a hard time accepting enough help. The way Jacob approaches Rachel's CFS is accepting and reminds me a little of my own boyfriend. Both men have been close to someone who needed extra help and came away better people for it. Some of it is written in a way that takes away Rachel's agency, but he learns from it. Overall, representation matters!

Jean Meltzer's The Matzah Ball is sweet, hopefully, and delightfully tropey. It also had me guessing how a few things would go and made me invested in all of the characters. If you want a little light in your December books, I highly recommend getting your hands or ears on this novel!

[gay-jewish-bucky]

How strict do you think Bucky is on obeying the laws of Kashrut? I’m assuming you hc him following the obvious stuff like not mixing meat and dairy and anything with pork/shellfish, but how about the more obscure stuff? Does he verify his fruit and veg to make sure there aren’t any bugs? Does he only buy milk that’s Chalav Israel? These are just examples, if there’s anything else you hc I’d love to know ^_^

That's a really good question!

I think Bucky follows kashrut the way his family did when he was growing up during the depression (when food scarcity meant observance of more obscure and strict interpretations of kosher laws were not entirely feasible), with moves to stricter observance now that money isn't a concern.

Bucky definitely keeps a kosher kitchen as best he can, it gives him much needed structure and is incredibly spiritually fufiling.

When designing their kitchen and buying everything they need, Bucky is proactive in planning for the things required to prevent cross-contamination of meat and dairy, such as:

The cabinet, drawer, organizational containers/trays and counter space needed to keep chalav (dairy) and basar (meat) separate

A double metal sink and two separate dishwashers

Two distinct sets of silverware

Two different coloured sets of utensils/cooking equipment

Different coloured sets of pots and pans

Visually distinct dishware (shape-wise) basar are square, chalav are round

Different coloured mugs and glasses

An oven (with a Shabbat mode) that can easily be properly kashered

A fridge with the organizational capacity to keep meat and dairy separate

etc

Things like kosher produce are a more recent push and many kosher authorities believe it's going a bit too far, so I don't think Bucky would follow it. That isn't to say he doesn't thoroughly rinse his fruit and vegetables before eating them, though.

Shopping for food, he and Steve make sure to buy kosher meat, dairy and only kosher certified pre-prepared foods. Living just outside New York it's easy to find stores with a huge range of kosher products.

The increase in popularity and availability of non-dairy alternatives means they can keep kashrut while broadening their dietary horizons.

Bucky has his Ma's kosher cookbook, Steve's Ma's Irish cookbook, as well as a growing collection of more modern cookbooks and recipe cards that include Jewish food beyond the traditional Ashkenazi fare that he grew up with.

Some miscellaneous thoughts

Bucky is really into matzah, so they have a whole cupboard stocked with boxes and boxes of different flavours of manischewitz that he can snack on to his heart's content.

Before Passover each year Bucky and Steve sell their hametz to Sam.

Bucky makes the most incredible, mouth-watering brisket and Steve always jokes it's what made him fall in love with Bucky in the 30's.

They get bagels and lox from Russ & Daughters whenever they're in Brooklyn (Bucky will death glare at anyone who suggests he buy store-bought bagels).

[earnestly-endlessly]

Hi! I'm wondering if you can make a list of fics where Erik's jewish heritage isn't ignored? I just came across the fact that a lot of authors don't explore this part of him for some reason and i found it kinda upsetting so i'm wondering if you have any recs! I liked "As They Kiss, Consume" and "Who Shall be King Hereafter" by sherwoodfox, in case anyone who's reading this ask is interested in the same topic.

Hi Anon. I'm sorry for taking so long with this list but your request sent me on a wide search for fics that fit with your request. I tried to find a variety of fics where Erik's Jewish heritage is addressed. Some of them aren't necessarily cherik, but most of them are. I hope you enjoy this list.

Mistletoe, Latkes, and Long-Term Revenge Strategies – pocky_slash

Summary: Charles knows that Erik hates working at a department store in the best of times. Being Jewish in a department store during the holiday season is far from the best of times. He does what he can to help.

A Nice Boy (the Family Matters Edition) – pocky_slash

Summary: Erik's not sure whether the problem is that he doesn't want his parents to meet Charles or that he doesn't want Charles to meet his parents. Either way, he never invites Charles to brunch. Why should he? It's not like they're dating.

A Road Trip to Pennsylvania – Aainiouu

Summary: For a year Charles has nurtured the biggest and most embarrassing crush known to man towards Erik. They are friends and roommates and when Erik asks Charles to accompany him to home on Thanksgiving of course Charles goes.

In the Bleak Midwinter – keire_ke

Summary: It is not easy to find out, well into the second decade of the twenty-first century, that your mother arranged a marriage for you. It is even less easy to convince her that you have no interest in the very fertile Magda, she of the wide hips and lustrous auburn hair. Fortunately, with a good friend at his side over the holiday weekend, Erik is sure he will prevail.

Speech Making – phalangine

Summary: Modern Emma AU- Charles Xavier, accomplished matchmaker and headmaster of North America’s preeminent school for mutants, intends to add another notch to his belt: setting up his friend Moira. His oldest friend, Erik, has doubts about this plan.

Charles doesn’t share them.

This is life (and everything’s all right) – pocky_slash

Summary: Edie Lehnsherr came into Charles' life long before he ever heard Erik Lehnsherr's name, and her death left a gaping hole in the lives of everyone in Charles' family. As the first Purim without her approaches, he begins to get creative in his efforts to bring everyone out of their grief. Kitchen creativity, however, is not quite his strength....

Bashert – AvengingAngel

Summary: Erik and Charles meet and fall in love. I wanted to write a story where Erik had a huge family. Pretty fluffy (for me anyways). I suck at summaries.

Note: The summary doesn’t reveal much but if you’re looking for a fic where Erik is jewish and has a large family with a heavy dose of cherik fluff and angst then this one is for you.

Math Reasons – pearl_o,  pocky_slash

Summary: "Mom says Erik always knows what he wants, it just sometimes takes him a little while to actually realize it," Ruth said.

Charles fell in love with Erik the first night they met, the first week of freshman year. Two years of friendship, adventures, arguments, hijinks, secrets, and summer visits later, Erik is starting to catch up.

Ser

It’s kind of our whole things – pearl_o, pocky_slash

Summary: After two years of best friendship, Charles and Erik thought they knew everything there was to know about each other. They're surprised, then, when their first summer as a couple reveals that they have a lot to learn about each other and themselves.

Sequel to Math Reasons

A Winter in New York – nextraordinaire

Summary: Charles and Erik have been childhood friends for as long as they can remember – Erik, living with his mother in Queens, and Charles in the big mansion in Westchester. For all, expect themselves, it was just natural progression that they'd end up together.

A series of ficlets from the same universe – can be read as separate and are out of chronological order.

Baby, It’s Cold Outside – heyjupiter

Summary: "It's just, this is my first Chanukah away from my parents. And it's--it's like 90 degrees out."

Erik Lehnsherr and Kitty Pryde celebrate a Genoshan Chanukah. It's a little different from the way it used to be in New York, but some unexpected visitors help them embrace the spirit of the holiday season.

Hold Back the Rain (front!strict mashup) – euphorbic

Summary: Charles Xavier: society darling, powerful political activist, well-known professor, and Dominant.

Erik Lehnsherr: anti-social, international motorcycle racer, and defiant submissive.

Erik is at Sepang in Malaysia for the fourteenth leg of the International World Championship. After doing poorly in qualifying, he's furious to find he has to take another VIP around the track instead of meeting Charles at the KL airport.

The Swan – waitfornight

Summary: In 1939 Erik and his sister Ruth are sent to Devonshire, England, during the Kindertransport refugee program to live with Kurt and Sharon Marko as foster children just before the start of World War II. Angry and wishing he could return home on the night of his seventeenth birthday, Erik meets a boy alone in the forest who is cursed to transform each day into a swan, only taking his true form by night.

Swan Lake AU.

The boy with the heart on his sleeve – euphorbic

Summary: Charles loses a high-stakes bet to Raven and is required to get a tattoo. However, when he makes a disparaging remark about the art form, Raven's acerbic mentor, Erik, steps in.

Or, the one where Erik and Raven are tattoo artists.

The Wurst Case Scenario – sareyen

Summary:If anyone asked why Charles, come rain, wind or shine, made the significant trek during his dismal lunch hour to dine at "Edie's Kosher Delicatessen", he would stubbornly say that it was because their pastrami on rye and potato knishes were absolutely to die for. He wasn't completely lying, because the deli's namesake, Edie Lehnsherr, made the best matzah ball soup Charles has ever had in his life. Still, Charles would rather shave his full head of hair off than admit that the real reason he would willingly walk through hail and fire to get to the corner deli was because of Erik, the insanely attractive man working the counter.

Sure, Erik has barely spoken two words to Charles other than "Hello, what can I get you?" or, after the third day in a row that Charles came to the deli, "Welcome back, what can I get you?", but Charles was more than happy to just ogle at the man from afar while devouring the juicy wurst Erik had put together with his (large and very capable) hands.

But, little does Charles know, Erik doesn't usually work the front counter. He only does it when he knows the cute blue-eyed man will be dining in.

This is life (and everything’s all right) – pocky_slash

Summary: Edie Lehnsherr came into Charles' life long before he ever heard Erik Lehnsherr's name, and her death left a gaping hole in the lives of everyone in Charles' family. As the first Purim without her approaches, he begins to get creative in his efforts to bring everyone out of their grief. Kitchen creativity, however, is not quite his strength....

c'est regarder ensemble dans la même direction – melonbutterfly

Summary: Since that day on the beach, Charles and Erik have learned to agree to disagree for the sake of living and working together. Then, for Christmas, and Charles gives Erik Hanukkah back a second time, and their relationship shifts a little further.

Terrible Hanukkah Sweaters and Other Life Challenges – professor

Summary: “Why am I here again?” Erik groans.

“I need you to lift things and glower at people over my shoulder when I tell people that it’s not ‘politically correct’ or a ‘war on Christmas’ to have a non-denominational winter holiday festival,” says Theresa Pryde.

Well, at least those are two things he’s good at.

Shrapnel – librata

Summary: It's late 1940, and tensions between the Axis and the Allies are tightening. Displaced and alone, 16-year-old German Jew Erik Lehnsherr finds himself employed as a servant by some snobby, terrible family in England whose house is far too big and whose money never seems to end. The worst part is, he isn't just mucking stables or cleaning plates–-he's tasked with tending to the whiny, disabled son named Charles, who might just drive Erik into absolute madness.

Or, the World War II fic in which Erik and Charles experience a changing world and a lot of teen angst.

Defying Expectations – Baamon5evr

Summary: Charles and Erik meet each other’s family. Neither of them gets what they expect.

table for three – pocky_slash

Summary: Erik should have known to call ahead to the Chinese restaurant--it's Christmas Eve and he lives in a predominantly Jewish neighborhood, after all. But before he can go home to mourn the loss of another one of his mother's yearly traditions, he's accosted by a teenage girl with a strange proposition--that he should stay and have dinner with her and her mother, instead.

different from all other nights – metonymy

Summary: "This year we are slaves; next year we will be free." Kitty and Erik host a seder for Passover at the Xavier School.

Libertad – ariadnes_string

Summary: Erik knew the look, had seen it his whole life, even before the war.  ”You, with your height and blue eyes and straight nose, you can pass. You can be free of us. You are not marked with your difference.” If you only knew, he’d thought then. He thought the same thing now. And it was that thought, as much as anything, that made him move towards the gate.

Wash Away – sebastian2017

Summary: One quiet, lonely morning, before Yom Kippur, Erik makes his way to the sea in search of forgiveness.

After? There is No ‘After’ – Unrepentant_Marvelist

Summary: Erik knows what he is for. He has known his responsibilities as a survivor since the moment he woke under a scratchy, lice-infested blanket in the Red Army hospital. His world is painted in lucid blacks and whites (so often splashed in red) and there is no room for uncertainty or indecision... until a certain sunburned Englishman throws himself into his world.

The Children of an Idle Brain – Margo_Kim

Summary: Sometimes, when he’s lucky, Schmidt can’t hurt him. It’s like there’s a room inside of Erik’s head that’s he’s usually locked out of, that won’t open no matter if he beats himself bloody against it. On those days, he endures. But sometimes—and Erik doesn’t know why, whether it’s that the stars align or some higher power takes pity or Erik screams loud enough to earn his reward—the door opens. Erik can duck inside and slam it behind him and watches himself through the windows as Schmidt slowly, methodically tortures him to strength.

These days, this past week, there’s a boy in the room with him and he tells Erik, “That’s horrible,” like that means something.

Somehow, across the world, Erik's and Charles' minds touch when they need each other most. They can't be sure that the other boy is real. They suspect that he is not. But that doesn't mean they aren't each other's lifeline until they lose each other and then for a while longer.

Tehillim – kvikindi

Summary: Erik, in Israel, afterwards: another life he could have had. If.

I fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) – childishinquiry

Summary: Erik has worn long sleeves his whole life, even before they had to wear yellow stars. Marching along his arm, in neat, black, English letters, are the words "My name's Charles Xavier."

Precious Few Years – sherwoodfox

Summary: Erik and Charles (known only to each other by the letters inscribed on their wrists) are meant to be together, soulmates, destined for the most powerful kind of love and connection a human being can experience.

But they are separated in almost every possible way- by distance, by circumstance, by language, by war. Their chances of success- of finding one another in the labyrinth of the world- are very slim. There is a reason why most people never find their soulmates.

But of course, Charles and Erik aren't ordinary children-

They have their gifts.

[loveforpreserumsteve]

About Last Night (Pre-Serum Omega!Steve and Alpha!Bucky Modern Mpreg AU)

Thirty-One:

Admittedly, Steve wasn't sure what a, "normal," Passover was like, but the Barneses sure did make his first one a good one. And an informative one with the family being patient with him and explaining that the seder plate represented the hardship that their ancestors suffered before eventually escaping from Egypt. As it happened to go: (1) eating the hopefulness of spring with the tears of slavery (parsley dipped in saltwater), (2) remembering the brokenness that slavery represented (breaking the matzah in half), (3) tasting the bitterness of slavery (by eating some bitter herbs that Steve surprisingly liked best; Squirt sure is a weird kid), (4) and then spreading the maror (bitter herbs) and charoset (spiced fruity, nutty mixture) onto a matzah. Which was what Steve enjoyed the most.

Then, it was time for the real meal.

With his appetite being akin to a bottomless pit, Steve stuffed himself with the matzah ball soup (that George promised to give him the recipe of before he and Bucky left), hard boiled eggs, lamb meatloaf, and veggies. Lots of veggies. Even taking his nieces' leftovers from them. Besides it wasn't like Steve could get enough of them as of recently. Especially carrots. Bucky even joked that he was going to wake up looking like an Oompa Loompa because he had been eating so many carrots.

Although Steve had never been one to eat when he was stressed – being much more likely to bake when he was in that mindset – Steve had been carefully watching everyone's dishes while he kept chowing down. When his fingers finally scraped against the empty porcelain, Steve glanced down, shocked.

Beside him, Bucky discreetly slid his plate over to Steve while keeping up the conversation with his tipsy sister. Well, kept arguing with her, "I wasn't that bad."

"Right," Becca snorted, "That's why you played a tree."

Steve good-humoredly scoffed at that, taking a bite of the baby carrot. Bucky smirked over at him, quirking a brow in a mute challenge. Simply enough, Steve shook his head and rolled his eyes, even with a smile on his lips while he chewed.

"You can't be good at everything," Steve shrugged.

Bucky's smirk softened into something more affectionate. Leaning closer, Bucky kissed Steve's temple, "Who's ready for dessert?"

A flutter in Steve's stomach erupted. He had been thinking about this moment all day. However, now that it was here, he didn't know if he wanted to go through with it.

"Ooh! Me!" Tibby answered, hopping out of her seat, "Then, we can watch Rugrats!"

"Do we have to?" Violet asked while Camila informed, "I heard Miri's family puts on a play."

"Babe, your kids are so weird," Dum Dum informed his wife, shaking his head all the while.

Winnie agreed and said, "Just be lucky that you don't have to spend hours reading the Haggadah like I had to growing up."

The two older girls' faces scrunched up in dislike. Winnie nodded, silently communicating that they were lucky.

Removing Gracie from her highchair, Mandy changed the subject back to dessert as she joked, "I'm just glad that Steve is celebrating with us this year. After all, if this cake roll tastes half as good as those snickerdoodles, I'm going to marry Steve."

Before the cake roll could be cut, Bucky stood and raced to the kitchen after his sisters. Just as he and Bucky discussed, Bucky carried the special gender reveal dessert into the dining room. Setting it down on the large wooden table, Bucky gestured for his family to move towards the other side, "Stevie and I have a surprise."

"Wait!" Silas excitedly climbed out of his seat to be on the other side of the table. Mandy also moved along with the nieces. Tibby even nabbed Bucky's previous seat beside Steve.

Winking at Steve, Bucky made sure to cut the end of the dessert, so the inside swirl would reveal they were having a boy. Only, once the green frosting covered end was removed, showing the inside mousse, Steve slumped in his seat.

"Shit," Steve sighed, and looked around the table where some of the relatives were confused with the purple inside, "It was supposed to be blue."

It took a moment for the family to realize what was going on. The first person to realize was George, who gasped and covered his mouth. Large tears welled over his eyes and rolled down his cheeks into his salt-n-pepper beard. Winnie connected the dots next, and soon enough, Bucky's siblings and nieces were cheering.

Tibby hugged Steve, kissing his cheek, and Dum Dum's loud voice boomed, "Congratulations!"

"Oh my goodness!" Sadie cheered, covering her mouth as she giggled.

"Thank you," Steve patted Tibby's back while Bucky hugged Becca, "Thanks."

"This is so exciting," George wiped at his tears.

"Have you decided on a name?" Winnie asked, then suggested, "Because I think today is a good day to mull over Moses."

Eyebrows arching, Steve looked over at Bucky. Not wanting to turn down his pseudo-in-law. After all, Steve was still building a relationship with the Barneses. He didn't want to ruin that by possibly insulting the matriarch.

Fortunately, Bucky didn't fear that fragility as he flat-out declined, "Hard veto."

"Damn," Becca chuckled, taking the end piece of the cake roll for herself. Taking a bite, a moan escaped her, "Okay, this is it." Pointing her fork at Steve, "You're not allowed to leave. Ever."

Blushing, Steve rubbed over Squirt. All he could do was think, I wasn't planning on it. The flutter from Squirt seemed to agree.

When everyone had a piece of the pistachio-strawberry dessert, they made their way to the living room. Taking the spot in the loveseat beside Steve, Bucky draped his arm around his slender shoulders, holding Steve close. While everyone else tried to squeeze in where they could, Sadie and Harper climbed up onto the loveseat, joining their uncles.

Steve wrapped his arm around Sadie, holding the four year old close. Sadie hugged him, rubbing her tiny hand over his bump. Steve couldn't help but smile at that and drop a kiss onto the top of her head.

"Ready?" Tibby asked, getting the, A Rugrats Passover, episode set up. Looking around, the family nodded and continued eating their dessert. Nodding herself, Tibby pressed play before digging into her own.

Growing up on Rugrats, Steve vaguely remembered the episode, but was glad for the refresher. Especially with the new context. As Steve ate his slice – and half of Bucky's – he learned about the history of their heritage and adopted a new tradition to pass down to Squirt. Knowing the importance of one's lineage, and how the past can shape the future. All he could do was hope he could raise a kid half as good as his nieces were. And with Bucky's help, he was confident they would.

TAG LIST: @t3a-bag

[allofthefeelings]

I've seen more than a few Jewish Peter Parker (& loved them) but don't think I've ever seen a Jewish May Parker. Could you do a little about her?

(Someone else asked for this earlier, but I didn’t post it til after you asked, so you’re getting one too. And this time, let’s do one that’s not all about grief.)

May is Jewish the way she feels like she’s a lot of things lately: she tries hard, she does what she can, but she’s never going to be able to get it quite right.

She looks at Pete- this good kid, the best kid, and all she has left of her family, and she just wants to do right by him, but she doesn’t even know how to start. She should still be protecting him and making sure he does his homework and he’s out there getting shot at.

Compared to that, the fact that they had saltines for the seder because neither of them had remembered to buy matzah honestly feels like she’s doing okay. (And really, it tasted a hell of a lot better, too.)

Pete’s back from Europe when he asks if she’s planning to do a seder this year, or if a friend’s would be on the table. May is surprised at how much it hurts- they hadn’t done a good seder, or a traditional one, but it had always been their thing, she thought. But he’s growing up. “Of course you can,” she says.

“You’re invited too-” he says and she cuts him off:

“Don’t worry about me, Pete. You’re allowed to have your friends.”

He makes that face.

“You already accepted for both of us, didn’t you?” she asks.

“I don’t know how to make that chicken thing you do every year,” he admits. “And I kind of already promised we’d bring it.”

That’s how they end up at Avengers compound, Pete carrying the still-warm aluminum tray until Wanda Maximoff (the SCARLET WITCH, how is this May’s life, she watched the Sokovian crisis on television) answers the door and takes it from him.

“Thanks for coming,” Wanda says, directing it more at May than at her nephew. “Peter said such great things about your Seders, and I don’t have any family anymore, so I was hoping that if I supplied the place–?”

Then May gets it. And all those feelings about not being quite good enough- at Judaism, at Peter, at being a person- all dissolves away.

This is family. This is enough.

Wanda, it turns out, remembered to get actual matzah.

It doesn’t taste bad at all.

[will-o-the-witch]

Okay for real though, Rowling's whole "antisemitic goblin" thing is actually WAY worse than a lot of people think.

Like even outside of Jowling Kowling Rowling being a piece of shit anyway, the blatant antisemitism in these Goblin characters is getting less and less excusable as an "honest mistake." Rowling's antisemitism is blatant at this point people's excuses don't work for her- here's why.

It's one thing to let your unconscious biases influence your world-building, nobody is immune to that risk, but it's another to have it pointed out and double down on it. Rowling is notorious for retconning details into her story, adding "inclusivity" after the fact (oh boy, we got "at least one Jewish wizard at Hogwarts" a few years ago!) but nothing was ever done to address the goblins. The house elves got an attempt at least with "they like being enslaved so it isn't bad!" (Which arguably makes it even worse but like... at least she recognized a problem existed in the first place I guess? I'm being very generous here.)

It's also way more than just "they own banks and have hooked noses." That said, that's notable enough on its own. When we say they look like a stereotype that is extremely literal, here's a piece of nazi propaganda side-by-side I saw:

Anyway, the books also establish that goblins can use magic but aren't allowed to carry wands. (So like, obvious systemic oppression that's never rationalized, we're supposed to just accept it and assume it's because they're untrustworthy or something.) Even Hagrid, who deals with magical creatures for a living and also tends to be much more With It than the rest of the cast, calls them "not the friendliest of beasts." Idk about y'all but it's a little disturbing to see even Hagrid call them "beasts" even though they're considered intelligent and "civilized" enough to run their whole banking system. Not to mention this is Hagrid, the guy that gave a Terrifying Giant Spider Everyone Hated a chance. The new game makes it even more clear that goblins are exceptionally greedy and don't understand (or abide by) wizard customs. They're considered at fault for their own oppression and the current rebellion must be stopped to put them back "in their place."

ALSO THEY ARE LITERALLY TRYING TO KIDNAP CHILDREN. That specifically has a HUGE and extremely direct history to a thing called blood libel, the leading excuse for pogroms for centuries. Christians love the idea that we are very literally kidnapping Pure Christian Children™ and using their blood to make matzah on Passover. That's not even kosher. The most recent example I could find of this exact myth was in the United States in 1928, though the idea of Jews luring away children was a good way to teach stranger danger in Nazi Germany. Nowadays blood libel sentiment fuels things like QAnon (where we're kidnapping children to use their blood for Satanic stuff I guess?) Antisemitism has a LONG history of painting Jews out to be predatory towards children in particular.

Okay, now for the main excuses for her I hear:

"But she visited a Holocaust museum and said she based Voldemort off of Hitler!"

Anyone can visit a Holocaust museum. They're buildings. Holocaust museums are not machines that suck in antisemites and spit out allies, yet in the public eye, it seems all a celebrity needs to do to remove accusations of antisemitism is visit a holocaust museum and make a statement about how horrified and inspired they were. Visiting a museum doesn't mean shit. Neither does writing a metaphor for Hitler or racism, that's literally the most low-hanging fruit possible.

Or everyone's biggest "gotcha:"

"But Rowling wasn't in charge of making the games OR the movie design!"

Y'all really think they didn't ask her to sign off on this? You really think she wasn't in the room when people pitched their ideas for the entire plot? You think she'd hand over the rights to her cash cow and then never look at the product?

Yeah, Rowling is probably not maliciously thinking about how she can make it worse. But at the very least, she wrote enough into her work to inspire people to make harmful stories like this, and a literal billionaire can't be bothered to hire people who give a shit (about any of her many issues) to screen things on her behalf. In the age we live in, I think it's telling that she doesn't even try. o

That new Potter game looks like it's just magical blood libel except they want you to burn the Jewish village down.

[reachabovethetrees]

Can you tell me a little about Pesach and why you are doing the things you are doing for prep? Like what the significance is to you? I don't have any contact with people who observe it and I've never heard about it, but your preparations sound so interesting. Is it traditional to have guests and visit people or is that just something you enjoy doing? I love hearing about people's traditions. I'm sorry if this is intrusive, please feel free to give as much or little info as you want.

Okay, never apologise for asking questions about Jewish stuff, because I am ALWAYS up for answering Jewish questions!!

So, essentially Pesach is the same thing as Passover, which you might know a bit about. It’s the festival connected with the story of the Exodus, when Moses said “let my people go”, there were plagues on the Egyptians when Pharaoh said “nah”, and finally the enslaved Israelites were able to escape - Moses (well, G-d really...) parts the “red sea” - more accurately known to be the “sea of reeds” and everyone escapes. In a way it’s our origin story. Or at least, it’s ONE of our origin stories! 

People often refer to Chanukah as “Jewish Christmas” - which is wrong on so many levels, especially since obviously there ISN’T a “Jewish Christmas”, ya know?? But if anything could be referred to as a similar sort of festival, I’d say that Passover is closer. It requires lots of preparation, specific foods, a big family meal, and it commemorates our origin story, as I said. Just like how Christmas celebrates the origin story of the Christians, in a sense. 

So, in terms of things like preparations and traditions, the main thing that people do for Pesach is to have a big meal with family and friends, and use the meal as an opportunity to retell the Exodus story, and fulfil a lot of other significant traditions. I always refer to the Seder (the passover meal) as a “multisensory educational meal” because it’s got different ritual foods to taste, such as bitter herbs so symbolise the bitterness of slavery (both our own slavery and the enslavement of other peoples throughout history), and sweet charoset, a paste made of apples, raisins, and other things such as nuts, which symbolises the sweetness of freedom but also the mortar used by the Israelite slaves. The seder has songs, it has actions, tastes and smells, and everything is there to teach us something about our ancestors, and about the people we want to be.

It’s traditional to invite guests, especially people who wouldn’t usually be able to celebrate Pesach to a Seder meal. This year we’re having some of Max’s cousins, an aunt, and his Dad to our meal!

The other main thing we do at Pesach is refrain from eating chametz - leavened products - for around a week. What this looks like varies from family to family. Some people will avoid things like certain nuts and legumes, beans etc, whereas others really just treat it as a pasta, cake and bread-free week. It’s traditional to eat matzah instead. Matzot are crispy crackers, and they taste a bit like Carrs water biscuits, if you’ve ever had those. People get realllllly creative to find ways to use them in different meals, making things like matzah pizza, matzah lasagne, and a kind of scrambled egg & matzah combo called matzah brei. 

I hope that helped! I know I missed a LOT out! Pesach is a very rich and exciting holiday, and there’s a lot of variation of how people celebrate it, within a certain framework!