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maybeacrowdedmind · 3 years ago

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So I Just Finished Skam...

First of all, I loved it. It was an incredible show and I'm so glad that there are so many remakes because I enjoyed it so much. One of my favorite things about the show was the fact that it feels extremely realistic, and I think a lot of that is due to the fact that a majority of the actors were actual teenagers (rather than actors who are obviously in their mid 20s and playing characters who are 16) and the fact that the characters behaved like actual teenagers (like using Facebook and Instagram, using "bad" language, dancing and singing along to music, etc. etc.). The other thing I adored about this show was the amount of importance that was placed on friendship. Platonic relationships in fiction are normally vastly underrated or underdeveloped in favor of romantic ones, so I appreciated that Skam showed so many friendships. So I decided to make a list of my favorite friendship moments from each season (two moments per season, with honorable mentions at the end before moving on).

Season 1:

1) Noora cheering up Eva by singing Justin Bieber to her:

I am not a fan of Justin Bieber at all (if you like him, all the more power to you, but I personally can't stand him), but Noora singing to Eva was such a great moment. She knew how sad Eva was, and decided to cheer her up by sharing something that made her (Noora) happy, and it was a really sweet moment between friends. It was also something that is realistic to do when someone you care about is down, and even though it was a small scene, it showed how strong a friendship Noora and Eva have.

2) All of the bonding moments between Sana, Vilde, Eva, Noora, and Chris:

I know this is a vague one, but just the sheer amount of time the girls spend together, whether they are doing something important or just hanging out was really awesome to see. Most of the time, tv shows don't take time to show us little moments like characters talking about boys or just sitting hanging out unless it has a more dramatc purpose. With Skam, we got to see those moments, which made the friendship between the girls that much more realistic.

Honorable Mentions for Season 1:

Eva grabbing the wrong Chris for Vilde, leading both Chris and Penetrator Chris (love that nearly everyone calls him that in the show by the way) to share a huge hug and go "name twins!" because that's totally something I'd do if I met someone who shared my name.

Eva and Ingrid finally talking about everything that happened, giving them both closure and the ability to move on, even if their friendship would never be the same (this was such a great scene because it showed Eva apologizing and telling Ingrid that she couldn't change what she did, but she would if she could, and it also allowed Ingrid to be hurt by what happened with Jonas, because let's face it, Ingrid was the injured party in that particular situation).

Season 2:

1) Noora telling Vilde all of the important things that the ingredients for tortilla do for you, and Vilde later doing the same for Noora:

I love how all of the girls take care of one another, but this scene in particular I loved a lot. Noora has noticed that Vilde hasn't been eating, and after hearing Vilde tell her all the reasons she doesn't like potatoes, Noora tells Vilde all the reasons she should. Noora also does so in a way that isn't shaming Vilde or being condescending to her, rather, Noora brings it up in a casual conversation. Later, Vilde notices Noora not eating, and prepares tortilla for her, quoting what Noora told her about potatoes and eating it with her. I loved this scene because it showed how much Noora and Vilde understood one another, as well as the importance of support.

2) The amount of support given to Noora by the girls after she discloses what happened with Nico:

This one is a total no-brainer. Noora had no idea what had happened that night, and had very little to go off of, and she spent the next few episodes terrified. When she tells the girls what she thinks might have happened, they all immediately stop what they're doing and rally around her. The no-dialogue scene in which they take Noora to the doctor and hold her and keep her safe was incredibly touching, and to be honest, nearly made me tear up.

Honorable Mentions for Season 2:

Sana and Chris playing a joke on the girls at the cabin during their break, because that whole episode was hilarious, and the individual ways each girl reacted was totally in character for each of them.

All of the girls telling Noora that they knew about her and William, because it was the most obvious thing in the world, and Noora being sheepish and surprised that she hadn't been hiding it as well as she thought.

Season 3:

1) Jonas, Magnus, and Mahdi telling Isak what to text Even:

This scene was so funny, and not the type I usually get to see when it comes to male friendships. I love that Isak tells them that he has no idea how to reply to Even, and Jonas tells him what he should say, with Magnus and Mahdi inserting their opinions and talking about how they text girls. It was enjoyable to watch because too many times fiction shows us that boys don't have the same relationship confusion that girls do, and it's often not true. I like that this scene allowed the boys to just be boys, because everybody deals with uncertainty, especially when it comes to liking someone.

2) Linn and Even playing video games together:

I know this scene is literally like two seconds and that we only see them ending from Isak's perspective, but hear me out. I'm pretty sure this is the first scene we see that shows Linn actively smiling and looking happy. Also, Even had just come off of a manic episode, was feeling depressed, and when we see him playing video games with Linn, he too looks actually happy, which is always great to see. Plus, the way Linn and Even are interacting with one another, it looks like they've known each other forever rather than two people who have just met, and even though it was a fraction of a scene, it was super great to watch.

Honorable Mentions for Season 3:

The entire development of Sana and Isak's friendship (I almost broke my "only two friendship moments" per season rule for this, but I decided to stick to my guns). Isak and Sana have a great friendship and I love how it came out of nowhere. Their friendship is literally started by being partnered together for school, which only happened because Sana sat by Isak to tell him that she had the weed he hid (a beautiful start to a beautiful friendship).

Isak coming out to Jonas by telling him that he liked someone and giving him the hint that it wasn't a girl, and Jonas reacting by thinking about the hint for a minute and then going "it's not me...is it?" because the expression Jonas had on his face while he thought about who it could be was funny because it looked like the fact that Isak had just come out to him wasn't even on his radar, because he was more concerned about guessing right, and the fact that he guessed himself was humorous to me.

Season 4:

1) Chris being a total ride-or-die friend to Sana after the stuff regarding the hate accounts for Sara and Vilde came out:

Everybody needs a friend like Chris. She is without a doubt one of the most loyal tv show characters I've seen and I wish Skam had run for more seasons so we could get a Chris season (and a Vilde season and an Even season, and a spin-off for Eskild and Linn, who both totally deserve one). Chris is the first person Sana told about the Sara account, and the first thing she did was tell Sana that the hate would blow over if Eva found out the truth (because Eva and everybody else thought Isak was responsible for it, and Eva was pissed AF at him). Chris also made sure that Sana knew that she didn't hate her for what happened, because everybody screwed up (seriously, we all need a friend like Chris).

2) The girls showing up to the bus meeting in their own tiny bus named "Los Losers" for Sana, effectively showing all of the Pepsi-Max girls (like Penetrator Chris, that will forever be their name) that if you mess with one of them, you mess with all of them. Sana was terrified that the girls would never forgive her, and when they all show up in the bus screaming her name, the joy on Sana's face is practically tangible. I love that they all pull Sana into the bus and give the Pepsi-Max girls the finger as they drive off, because really, what better way to show the true bonds of friendship than by collectively flipping off a ton of girls who messed with one of their own.

Honorable Mentions for Season 4:

Sana and Even's friendship, and the fact that she protected and respected his privacy when Isak asked her why she never said that she already knew Even, because too many times do I see characters give away information to other people that isn't theirs to give, and the fact that it didn't matter to Sana that Isak and Even were together, she was still going to make sure that Even had a right to the details of his personal life was extremely important.

The conversation between Sana and Jamilla about their schooling and Islam, because the texts we see between them prior to their falling out show that they were very close, and it was nice to see them talk and reconcile, because that's how life works sometimes. You fight and fall out with people, and after time passes, sometimes there is reconciliation.

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hangovercurse · 4 years ago

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I’ll Be Here

Colson tries to take you out for a nice dinner, but things don’t go exactly as planned.

Request: “hey there !! i absolutely love your work and was wondering if you'd consider writing something where the reader struggles with an ED? and Colson finds out? Just an angsty hurt/comfort-y kind of thing maybe? If you aren't comfortable/don't have the time then no worries !! I hope you have a lovely day ♥️🐇”

Colson x reader

Warnings: Eating disorders (explicit), cursing, vomit

A/N: If you are struggling with an eating disorder, there is help. The National Eating Disorders Association Hotline is 1-800-931-2237 and the national hopeline (for any and all crises) 1-800-442-4673. It gets better, I promise.

A/N part 2: This is really personal to me, as I am currently in treatment for an ED and still very much suffer from those impulses. If you are struggling and need to talk to someone who has been where you are, my dms are always open.

Word Count: 3107

Friday nights were always date nights. They had been since you and Colson had gone out on a Friday for your first date, 3 months ago. And tonight was no exception, but you wanted nothing more than to cancel.

Colson had announced he would be taking you to a very fancy restaurant that would be serving you both a five-course meal. “Babe, I won’t be able to eat all of that.” You told him, being completely serious.

He laughed it off, thinking you were just being overdramatic. “Don’t worry, I’ll eat whatever you don’t.” You pretended to laugh along, but in reality, your stomach was churning with the thought of how much food you’d be eating come Friday.

And now it was here, and you felt no more confident in yourself. You hadn’t eaten in almost two days to prepare for this, even though you’d gone longer for less before. You had been trying to eat more whenever Colson was around so he wouldn’t pick up on anything, but he was starting to be around a lot more, and it was getting harder to fake normalcy.

You were getting ready at your house, your hair and makeup done. You pulled the dress you planned on wearing out of your closet, a loose black dress with gold accents on it. You were hoping that it’s flowing would hide your figure. You caught a glimpse of yourself in your mirror, only a bra and underwear covering you. You scowled in disgust at your figure, sucking in your stomach and straightening your posture to try and flatten yourself out, but it didn’t help.

Before you could get more upset with yourself, you turned away from the mirror and put the dress on. “Tonight is going to be a good night.” You chanted to yourself.

Colson picked you up, looking sexy as ever. He was in a pair of blue pants, a plain white t-shirt, and a blue jacket. “You clean up nicely.” You smiled as he pulled you in for a quick kiss.

“You look fuckin’ incredible, babe.” He told you as he separated your lips. “Like, seriously, how did I get so lucky?”

You rolled your eyes, cringing internally but externally walking to the other side of his car. “If anyone here is lucky it’s me.”

The restaurant was, as he promised, hella fancy. The hostess led you both to a table in the far corner of the restaurant, away from peering eyes. You were handed a menu with five course headings on it and 3 options under each.

You looked at Colson with wide eyes, only to find him grinning at the menu. You decided not to say anything, not wanting to ruin his good night with all of your problems. You knew he would find out eventually, but you determined that tonight would not be that time. So, you gave the waitress your orders. Colson ordered a bottle of white wine for you two to sip on.

Before you know it, the first course had arrived. It was small, thank goodness, as it was only hors d’oeuvres, but you usually only ate that much food in a day, you couldn’t imagine how the next courses would go.

You had to admit, despite your hatred for food, the shallot and pancetta tortilla crisps were good. You figured this could be easy if you just let yourself relax. You let yourself fall into easy conversation with your boyfriend.

Then the appetizer came out, stuffed mushrooms. You struggled your way through, eating very slowly so that Colson would hopefully not notice that you were only eating half the amount that he was.

You got about halfway through your salad before your entire body said “stop.” You physically couldn’t eat anymore, the thought of holding your fork made you want to throw up. You got distracted by trying to calm yourself down that you were completely ignoring Colson.

“Y/N, are you listening?”

You snapped your head up from your plate to meet his eyes, a sorry expression coming onto your face. “Yeah, sorry. I just got distracted. I’m good.”

Colson eyed you wearily before continuing whatever he was talking about. The waitress brought out the fourth course in the meantime; your main meal. You had gotten Chicken Francese, hoping it would be the lightest thing on the menu. You were wrong.

The chicken was huge. You tried to smile at the waitress, but you couldn’t even look her in the face, too focused on how the hell you were going to pretend to eat this chicken. Colson sent a look in your direction before giving the waitress a polite, “thank you.”

Once she had left, he glared at you. You looked up once again, “what?” Your voice was quiet.

Colson grumbled, “nothing.” You gave a small pout when he looked away from you, cutting into his food. You decided it was better not to respond to him.

Instead, you returned your attention to the food in front of you. The tossing and turning of your stomach reminded you how disgusting you already felt. You could hear the faintest whispers of the devil in the back of your mind.

You’re gonna eat all that? Think about everything else you’ve consumed already! No wonder you’re so fat.

He’s never gonna stay with someone who eats as much as you do.

You shooed them away, taking your fork and knife in your hand. You cut the chicken into a few small pieces, taking nibbles at them, and pretending to enjoy it. You and Colson had stopped talking, and you could feel his irritation building.

You looked up to see his plate almost half empty, Jesus how could he eat so fast? He met your gaze, glancing down to your plate and scowling. “Why aren’t you eating?”

You looked down, a small sigh escaping your mouth. “I’m just not that hungry, I guess.” You bit your lip, about to continue when he cut you off “I told y-“

“Do you not like it?”

You shook your head, “No, it’s no th-“

Colson let out a frustrated sigh, “well, sorry Y/N. Tried to do something nice for you but apparently even this isn’t good enough for you.”

You wanted to scream at him, “that’s not what this is about you fucking idiot!” But you were in a very nice restaurant and the patrons would not appreciate that at all.

If you kept pushing, it would end up going in that direction, so you decided not to explain yourself. Instead, you forced the food down, showing Colson that you were eating it. He scoffed every time you made a show of putting the fork into your mouth and chewing the chicken.

Every swallow felt like an anchor dropping into your stomach. Your stomach was bubbling like some kind of witch’s brew.

When dessert arrived, you wanted to get up and walk out, but Colson was already on edge and you didn’t want to make it any worse. You both hadn’t spoken much, but you could tell he was getting frustrated with you. It was the worst feeling in the world.

Your stupid insecurities are ruining his life.

You can’t even stop thinking about yourself for one night to let him have a good time?

Talk about selfish.

You pushed the thoughts down, taking a small bite of the apple crème brûlée. It felt like a tipping point, like if you ate anything else you would throw up right then and there.

You placed your spoon down onto your plate, harsher than you had hoped. You mumbled out a quick, “I’ll be right back.” Before standing up and making your way to the restrooms.

Luckily, there was no one inside, though you knew that could change at any moment. You locked yourself in the stall furthest away from the door, crouching down in your heels.

It only took a few moments before the food you had just eaten came up, your vomit filling the toilet bowl. You tried to keep your gags quiet in case anyone were to walk in.

He tries to take you on a nice date and you’re in the bathroom, puking.

Like I said, selfish.

I don’t even know why he stays with you, honestly

You’re not pretty, you’re not very smart, you’re not much of anything at all, really.

You’re a drama queen!

Maybe you should just stop eating for good

Then this wouldn’t be an issue

You don’t know when the tears started, but they were streaming down your face. You grabbed a handful of toilet paper, softly dabbing your face to hopefully clear your skin of any makeup that may have run off.

You flushed the toilet, piecing yourself together haphazardly. You stood up, stumbling out of the stall, and facing yourself in the mirror. Your eyes were slightly puffy, but none of your makeup had smeared, luckily.

Disgusting

You sighed, glancing up to prevent more tears from falling. You put a fake smile on your face, walking out of the restroom and to your table. When Colson saw you, he stood up abruptly. “I already paid, let’s go.” His voice wasn’t loud, but it was harsh enough for you to know he was angry.

He walked in front of you as you made your way to the car. His hand never found yours like it normally would, there was no warmth coming from him, only a cold distance. The car ride to your house was silent. You wanted to say something, but you couldn’t quite find the words. At one point you’d reached out to place your hand on top of his, but he jerked his hand away, his other hand gripping the wheel tighter.

When he finally pulled into your driveway, you sat there for a few moments, studying his face as he looked straight ahead. “Colson,” You whispered.

“Don’t.”

You sighed, your eyes filling with tears again. You hated almost everything about yourself, but you hated when he was mad at you even more.

You don’t deserve him.

You nodded to yourself, opening the door and stepping out of the car. As much as you wanted to explain yourself and beg him to forgive you, you knew what was best for him. If you let him leave now, he wouldn’t have to bear the burden of your problems. He could be free to find something better. Someone better.

So, you went inside, tears falling down your face the entire way in.

Colson almost didn’t catch the glossy look in your eyes, or the red swelling around them. But he did, and it made him feel all sorts of weird inside.

Why did he have to get so mad?

It was just a stupid dinner.

He knew he was being too hard on you, but he was just trying to do something romantic.

Is that too much to ask for?

Apparently so.

But he shook off his thoughts, turning his car off and making his way to your now closed door. Even if he was upset, he needed to make sure you were alright.

When he walked in, the lights were all off, the house very dark and very quiet. You had only gone in a few moments before him, where were you?

His questions were answered by small gasps coming from your guest bathroom, mixed with sobs. He ran to where you were, throwing the door open and turning on the light.

He found you sitting over the toilet, your bile in the bowl. A look of worry immediately flooded his features, and he kneeled down beside you. He wrapped one of his arms around you loosely, his other rubbing your back. You leaned back into his chest, sobs shaking your entire body. “I’m- sorry.” Your words were very choppy, interrupted by your gasps for air.

“It’s okay, baby.” He sighed, resting his chin on the crown of your forehead.

You shook your head, determinately. “I tried,” a sniffle, “really hard.”

His arm on your back joined the one around your waist, rubbing circles into your stomach. You pulled away from the motion, but he kept you firmly in his grasp. “I couldn’t do it.”

Your whispers sounded so weak, so pathetic. Colson wracked his brain for an explanation. This had to be more than just the food not tasting good. Maybe you were sick?

“Shhh, baby. It’s okay. I’m not upset.” He whispered, leaning down to press a soft kiss to your temple. You both sat like that for a while, your chest heaving and his soft words calming you down.

Eventually you were able to collect yourself enough to form coherent thoughts. “I’m sorry I ruined date night.” You mumbled, your hand moving to stop his from their movement.

“It’s okay, babe. You can’t control this shit.” He whispered.

“You shouldn’t have to deal with this shit though!” You shouted as best as you could, your hoarse voice making it sound more like a whine. “If I weren’t so-“ You cut yourself off, wanting to save him the burden of knowledge. If you told him he would either feel disgusted with you and leave or feel sorry for you and stay. You didn’t know which one you were more scared of.

Colson brought his lips to your temple again, “Babe, it’s okay. You should’ve told me you were sick. We could’ve rescheduled.”

His words made you let out a dry laugh, “I’m sick alright.” You mumbled, tears rolling down your eyes again. “But not that kind of sick.” You whispered.

You looked back at your boyfriend, turning so that your entire body was facing him. You could see the confusion in his features. “I want to help you, but I have no idea what’s going on. I can’t read your mind, babe, you gotta tell me.”

You shook your head, looking to the floor. “Trust me, it’s better if you don’t know. You don’t want to know.”

He took your chin in his hand, guiding you up to look at him again, “I do wanna know, Y/N. I wanna help you.”

Your eyes looked everywhere but his, shutting momentarily as more tears fell. You took a deep breath in through your nose, trying to find where to start.

“I have an eating disorder.” You whispered, trying to get the words out as possible so you couldn’t take them back. Colson’s eyes went wide with realization, “I was diagnosed with a purge disorder when I was like, 16. I think it’s morphed into anorexia since then.” Your entire body was shaking with nerves.

He’s gonna hate you now.

You’re disgusting.

Colson grabbed your face with both hands, cradling it gently. “Baby, I’m so sorry. I never should’ve taken you-“

“You didn’t know.” You shut down his thoughts. He shouldn’t blame himself for your problems. “It’s not your fault. I thought I could just suck it up and get through it but, obviously I couldn’t.” You shrugged, letting out a frustrated sigh.

His hands fell from your face, grabbing your hips and lightly dragging you closer to him. He moved your legs to rest on his outstretched ones as he spoke, “I shouldn’t have gotten so mad about it, though. I was so frustrated because I thought you didn’t like it. I was embarrassed because I just wanted to impress you.”

You reached your arms up to wrap around his neck, holding yourself up. “I was very impressed, and it’s not that I didn’t like it. Food is just really hard for me. I’ve gotten so used to eating next to nothing. I didn’t realize how hard it would be to eat like a regular person.” He nodded, a frown on his face. “I’m sorry.” You whispered.

“You don’t have to be sorry; you didn’t do anything wrong. This is just part of who you are.” He looked into your eyes, deeply.

You sighed, “I- I guess. But I didn’t want to have to burden you with all this shit. You shouldn’t have to put up with all this. You deserve better.”

He scrunched his face, “Woah woah woah. Y/N you are not a burden. I told you, this is just part of who you are, and I love who you are. I’m not putting up with anything, I’m accepting you for every part of who you are. I don’t want anyone else; I just need you.”

His words made your heart race. He sure knew how to string lines together. “You love me?” You asked, softly. He’d never said those words to you before. Sure, you had thought them, but you were scared he’d think it was too soon.

He smiled, leaning to kiss your forehead, “yes, you dummy.” He chuckled against your skin.

“I love you.” You whispered. “I’m sorry.”

“Stop saying that.” He mumbled and you sniffled.

Your first thought was to apologize, but you knew he’d stop you in your tracks. “I just don’t want you to feel sorry for me or think I’m weak. I’ve been dealing with this shit for years now.” You paused, a thought crossing your head. You whispered it to yourself before you even realized he would hear, “maybe I am weak.”

“Hey,” he kept your head in place when you started to drift towards the floor, “you are not weak. This just proves how strong you are. You’ve lived with this for how long now? And you’re still fighting. That’s not weakness, babe. That’s strength.”

“Sor-“ You cut yourself off, “If I was really strong, I’d be over this shit now.”

“It’s a disease, baby. It’s just like a broken bone. It’s not gonna get better unless you treat it. You’ve been trying to hide it for so long now, let me help. We can get you a nutritionist, and a therapist, and we’ll stock up on whatever food you can eat, and we’ll work on it together. Whatever you need.”

“Are you sure? That’s a lot of work, Cols. I’m not sure if I’m wor-“

He cut you off, blue eyes staring deep into your own. “You are worth all of this and more. Don’t think for a second that you’re not. You deserve to be happy and healthy and I am gonna be here to support you for as long as you want me here.”

You paused for a moment, taking in his words. “Thank you.” You whispered, “For tonight and for all this. Just, thank you. For everything.”

“I love you.” He pulled you closer to him, hugging you tightly. “Thank you for telling me. I know it wasn’t easy.”

“I love you too, Colson.”

#mgk #mgk imagine #mgk angst #mgk fluff #machine gun kelly #machine gun kelly imagine #Colson baker #colson x reader #colson baker imagine #colson baker fluff #colson baker angst #colson imagine

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dongofthewolf · 4 years ago

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When You’re Lost in the Darkness, Look for the Light- Chapter 2

Abby Anderson x Fem!Reader

Read chapter 1 here !

After your night with Abby you head down to the cafeteria again to grab some food, still convinced it was all a dream. It’s not until you recognize a familiar face from across the room that you realize it was real, and this time she’s not alone.

Warnings: mild violence, swearing, fluff, just a lot of gay panic tbh

The new chapter is finally here !! All the positive comments on the first one made me so happy so THANK YOU for those :))

BTW that gif of Abby... both eyes open no blink (O_O)

When you woke from your slumber you were almost positive that your encounter with Abby was merely a dream or a figment of your imagination. It was the first time since moving to the base that you hadn’t woken up in a cold sweat; nightmares filled with the echoes of clickers and that piercing sound of ammo clattering on the floor was not an uncommon occurrence. After spending those two dreadful days trapped in a bunker with nothing but a pocket knife and a small handgun, a good night's sleep was something you no longer expected. You shivered as you recalled that dark, cold, concrete room you had barricaded yourself in, awaiting your death with no food, water, or supplies of any kind. It wasn’t until you heard the crashing of pipe bombs in the above levels that you snapped out of your weakened state. The WLF had on a whim decided to clear the building you were hiding out in and saved you. Your rescue was a complete stroke of luck and you weren’t sure whether to be incredibly grateful or afraid for it.

Still groggy from your sleep, you hadn’t even realized the small piece of paper that had been slipped under your door. It was from a page in a notebook that had been ripped out, and on it was a small message in neat, military handwriting: “Had a lot of fun last night :) - A”.

“So it was real!” You thought. That absolute tank of a woman wasn’t just a product of a sleep deprived trip to the communal cafeteria; she was real and every fibre of your being hoped she had enjoyed last night as much as you did.

You neatly tucked the note into your copy of Pride and Prejudice before getting ready for the day (or more like afternoon since you had slept in). After brushing your teeth and washing your face, you slipped on your military issued combat boots and a light sweatshirt before leaving your dorm.

It was still raining outside but luckily the WLF base wasn’t too chilly. Even when it snowed they always managed to maintain some modicum of heat, it seemed as though the wolves could always find ways around the pesky inconveniences of living in a post-apocalyptic world. You never really questioned it though and you knew better than to doubt Isaac’s methods. It’s not like you’ve actually met him or anything, but the stories that you had heard were enough to send a chill down your spine, and you knew that even if you did ask questions it’s not like anyone would answer them anyways.

Fortunately you hadn’t slept in past lunch because you were absolutely starving, so starving that even the shitty WLF base food was starting to smell like heaven. As you made your way into the cafeteria that was teeming with life, there was only one thing on your mind: devouring those damn burritos. Once you finally got some food you quickly sat down to demolish it, amazed at how so much happiness could be contained within the confines of a single bland tortilla and completely oblivious to the staring of a familiar pair of blue eyes from across the crowded room.

“Just talk to her already.” Manny said in a teasing tone.

Abby quickly snapped out of it “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”.

Of course Abby knew what he was talking about; in your rush to completely annihilate those burritos you had failed to notice Abby sitting at a table a few feet away. Abby couldn’t explain it but her heart was racing, the same way it would if she were in combat with a hoard or some Scars.

Manny rolled his eyes “Dude I’m not blind, you’ve been staring at her ever since she sat down. So who is she?”. He relished at the sight of Abby’s nervousness, he hadn’t seen her like this since back when she was still dating Owen.

“Huh? No hablo inglés.” Abby said sarcastically trying to get Manny off her back.

“Fine, I guess I’ll have to ask her myself.” Manny started to get up when Abby kicked his shins from under the table. Manny yelped in pain “Dude! What the hell?”.

“I will literally clock you in the face, sit your ass down right now.” Abby quickly glanced around the room to make sure no one noticed Manny writhing in pain.

Manny chuckled then smiled that classic smug grin while he gripped his definitely-bruised shins “I knew it, someone’s got a crush.”.

“God you’re annoying, I should’ve let that clicker eat you last week.” Abby said in an annoyed tone as she fell back against her chair. Abby felt a tinge of remorse for kicking Manny like that, she knew that Manny probably wouldn’t have actually walked up to you; but she couldn’t have risked it. Abby looked up and noticed Manny’s expression had changed, afraid she overstepped with that last statement Abby was just about to apologize when Manny started.

“What the fuck Abby?! Why didn’t you tell me about this girl, you know I’m the best wing-man.” Manny was suddenly very intrigued, Abby had always been very secretive when it came to her love life so Manny jumped at the opportunity to become her certified dating coach. Plus, not only did Manny have his fair share of experience with women, he also just really wanted to see Abby less lonely. After Owen and Mel started dating along with Leah and Jordan, Abby was stuck constantly third-wheeling the entire group; Manny didn’t think she minded that much, but sometimes it hurt his heart to see her all alone.

“There’s nothing to talk about Manny, we’re just friends.” Abby replied reluctantly, not completely believing her own words. It’s not like you guys were dating, but it felt like a disservice to call what you guys had a “friendship”. The word itself didn’t accurately encapsulate enough meaning for her and despite the fact she was a voracious reader, Abby just couldn’t come up with a word for what you two had.

“If you’re friends, then just go up and talk to her.” Manny knew Abby, and he knew that she always needed a push if he wanted to get anything out of her.

“I can’t… I just can’t. I’m not like you, okay?” Abby was conflicted, waves of doubt started to roll in the more she thought about it. She didn’t want to consider the possibility that maybe you didn’t want to talk to her; that maybe you were just being nice last night and didn’t actually like her, or maybe even that you saw her when you came in and decided to ignore her on purpose.

Obviously Abby was freaking out for no reason, but those small anxious bits of uncertainty that crept in from the back of her mind made her shield of confidence feel tenuous and weak; something she despised.

Manny knew what Abby meant but being the smug little shit he is, he wanted to hear her say it out loud “What do you mean?”.

Abby sighed, “Don’t make me say it.”.

“No, no I really want to hear it.” Manny smiled that famous shit-eating grin, the one he used whenever Abby had to admit he was right.

Abby realized he wasn’t letting go of this “Ugh you know, you can… talk to people.”. Abby could tell by Manny’s face that he wasn’t satisfied with her answer, so not wanting to risk the possibility that he’ll stand up again Abby gave him a look of defeat “and I guess you’re charming or whatever.”.

“Ah! Música para mis oídos.” Manny smiled proudly, hearing Abby compliment him was almost as rare as seeing her without that signature braid. Just as Manny was getting ready to haul Abby’s ass to your table he looked over and realized that you had disappeared, it wasn’t until Abby kicked his shins again that he realized you were standing right there.

You were elbow deep in your third burrito before your dumbass realized that Abby was sitting a couple tables across from yours. “Shit!” You thought, how long had she been sitting there? Did she notice you? No, probably not… unless, what if she was so disgusted by you huffing down those burritos that she ignored you? Ugh! How could you not have noticed her?

You calmly set your burrito down, wiping your face and praying to God there wasn’t anything stuck in your teeth. You figured that Abby probably hadn’t noticed you so you decided to just bite the bullet and talk to her. As you stood up from your seat to make your way over to her table, you quietly whispered to yourself “Come on y/n, don’t be a pussy.”.

“Hey Abby.” She was sitting with a man who you assumed was the friend that she had transferred here with, she mentioned his name last night but you couldn’t place it. He suddenly jerked around to face you with a calm smile on his face, his rugged features and charming personality now making it clear as to why Abby complained about being kicked out of her own room so many nights. Even though you weren’t attracted to him, you understood what all the fuss was about.

“Hey Y/N, I didn’t even see you there.” As soon as the words came out Abby shot Manny a look, the kind of look that meant “don’t say a fucking word.”. However, of course Manny being… well Manny, he grinned and raised his hand to shake yours.

“I’m Manny.” His smile was warm and welcoming as he shook your hand “Please, sit down sit down. Tell me all about yourself.”.

You took a seat next to Abby, your knees just barely grazing each other due to the shortage of space at the table. Even though it was such a small form of contact, you couldn’t help but feel like there was an electric charge connecting you together. You wondered if she even noticed the gesture, if Abby could hear your heart daring to beat out of your chest; if she noticed that small gap between your hands on the table, or if she even noticed the small clandestine looks you were sending her the whole time.

Abby froze stiff as a board when you sat down next to her, and she did her best to maintain her composure when she felt your knee graze hers from beneath the table. This was the closest you two had been and now she could really see the details of your face and your actions; how you pushed a strand of hair behind your ear whenever you were nervous, or how you snorted when Manny thought “Little Women” was just about really tiny people. She noticed how bright your smile was, how it was the kind of smile that could instantly light up an entire room, and she was astonished because Abby finally understood the real meaning of that one Firefly quote about “looking for the light”. Abby realized that no matter what, she would follow you to the ends of the Earth. You were this bright and unexpected light that suddenly entered her life, you weakened her defences and made her feel like a ball of putty, and while one part of her detested that feeling, another part of her never wanted to part with it.

You explained to them how you had been rescued by the WLF and how you were a pretty skilled mechanic. You even told them about how although you loved your job, you desperately wanted to work in the library, because other than the fact that you wouldn’t be covered in grease at the end of every day, you’d also be surrounded by things you love.

The two told you about the “Salt Lake Crew” and how they were essentially Isaac’s top soldiers. It was a fact that left you with about a hundred questions, but you figured it wasn’t the right time to bring up their boss so you tried your best to brush it off. The three of you sat at that table talking for what felt like forever before the cafeteria staff kicked you guys out because they had to clean up.

As they both walked you to your room you were so incredibly excited. You had spent so many months at this boring outpost, spending most of your time reading or crying. Then Abby happened; she came into your life and suddenly you weren’t alone anymore. You were so insanely grateful for this newfound happiness that you just wanted to leap into those insanely strong arms.

Just as the two were about to leave Abby grabbed your hand and leaned down to your height so she could quietly talk to you, “Hey Y/N, can I ask you something?”.

You were so dumbfounded by her hand holding yours that you nearly passed out, you tried to form words but all you could manage was a small nod.

Abby smiled as she stood up and looked to Manny “Hey, you can go ahead I’ll catch up. I just need to talk to Y/N for a quick sec.”.

Manny immediately got the signal and grinned so wide Abby thought his face would freeze like that, Abby knew she was never going to hear the end of this, but she couldn’t really be bothered to care with your hand in hers.

Then Manny was gone, and it was just you and Abby. Her hand was still holding yours and you couldn’t help but notice all the details of them; how she had these small calluses on the palms of her hands, formed from years of wielding firearms and lifting weights. You realized how much damage she could do with them—how much damage she had done with them—but instead she stood there softly cradling your hand in hers, just lightly squeezing it before she looked at you with those same pools of blue you wanted desperately to drown in.

“Hey so I know we kind of just met last night, but I’ve really enjoyed hanging out with you and…” Abby paused to contemplate her words before starting again “and I was wondering if we could do this more often. I’m doing some work for Isaac tomorrow but I’ll be back later if you wanted to come by and watch a movie or something?”.

“Holy shit!” You thought “Did Abby just ask me out on a date?”. You couldn’t believe it, there was no way this absolutely fucking perfect girl just asked you on a date. You almost wanted to pinch yourself because nothing about this felt real, it wasn’t until you snapped back to reality that you realized you had been staring at Abby in absolute silence while she stood there waiting for an answer.

You quickly answered “Absolutely, I would love to come over and watch a movie.” Your heart was pounding dangerously fast against your ribcage and your face was completely flushed as you gave her a reassuring smile.

Abby sighed with relief and lightly squeezed your hand “Great! I’m in the room across from the gym, does eight o-clock work?”. Abby felt like a weight had been lifted from her shoulders, at first when Y/N didn’t say anything, she was afraid she had misread the situation and crossed the line.

“I’ll see you then.” As you started heading back to your room, you suddenly remembered something “Hey Abby!” She looked back with curiosity as you shot her a small smirk “Thanks for the note.”.

Abby smiled shyly “I’ll see you tomorrow Y/N.”

—

Read the next chapter here

#abby anderson x reader #abby anderson imagine #the last of us imagine #abby anderson #abby tlou #manny tlou #fluff #fxf #tlou #tlou2 #the last of us #the last of us part 2 #gay panic #slow burn kinda

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refinedbuffoonery · 4 years ago

Text

Looking Through A Window (2)

macriley married undercover au

masterlist.

Oh man. My dudes. I received so much love and support and excited feedback on the first chapter that I thought my heart was going to explode. Y’all are so wonderful. Keep it up. <3

*****

Luckily, Matty lets them take the Phoenix jet to Houston. Flying commercial would make today even more tortuous than it already promises to be, albeit for a different reason.

No matter how hard he tries to distract himself, Mac cannot stop staring at the diamond ring on Riley’s finger. The princess cut gem is stunning and ridiculously large, but it suits her cover as a lucrative arms dealer. A white gold wedding band sits below it. Riley left her usual assortment of rings at home, and Mac can’t help but think her long, delicate fingers look bare without them.

He tears his eyes away from the rings again and again, both on the plane and while driving to the safe house. Riley drives with just her left hand, her right elbow resting on the center console. Mac likes driving, but there’s something relaxing about riding shotgun while Riley drives instead. He’s never been able to put a finger on it, but the sense of ease washes over him all the same. Admiring the way sunlight illuminates her engagement ring is simply a bonus.

He doesn’t let himself imagine what he might give her, in an alternate future where she reciprocates his feelings and one day wants to marry him.

Harley obediently lays in the backseat, staring out the windshield. She's been on her best behavior the entire twenty four hours Mac's known her, ever the professional.

Which puts her completely at odds with Mac and Riley's shenanigans—cracking jokes, dancing on the plane and in the car, doing purposefully bad impersonations of Russ. These are the best parts of going on ops alone with Riley. They can let loose in a way they just couldn’t when anyone else other than Bozer was around. Everyone else is professional all the time; Mac and Riley are only professional when they have to be.

Riley taps the steering wheel in time to the classic rock song on the radio. “What do you want for dinner?”

“Dinner? We haven’t even had lunch yet!”

“True.” Riley chuckles. “Can you tell I’m hungry?”

Mac gives her a sly look. “Not at all.”

They settle on Texas barbecue for lunch on their way to the safe house, because that’s what Jack would choose if he was here. If only the old man could see them now, all grown up and getting sent to take down terrorists unsupervised.

Seated in a booth in the far corner of the restaurant, Mac raises his brisket sandwich in a toast to Jack, in whatever afterlife he found himself in. Hopefully it’s the one with an endless supply of good barbecue.

“Oh man, Jack would’ve loved this,” Riley says through a mouthful of food. She sneaks Harley a piece of brisket.

Mac smiles. “Yeah, he would’ve.”

It’s easier, now, to talk about him. At first, Mac hadn’t been sure he could ever get to a point where talking about Jack didn’t make him want to hit something or just curl up and sob.

But here he is, on the other side. Him and Riley both.

Their safe house is another twenty minutes away from the restaurant, in a nice neighborhood full of trees and children playing on the sidewalks. It’s so much greener than a California neighborhood could ever dream of being. There’s even a park across the street from their apartment complex. It’s exactly the sort of place a young, affluent couple would want to live.

Riley parks in their designated space, and the pair ascend the stairs to apartment number 202. Outside of the car, they don’t dare use each other’s real names until they’re sure the apartment is free of bugs. The place was furnished earlier that week by other Phoenix agents, but Mac and Riley do a thorough sweep of every room just in case.

It’s a nice apartment. Wood flooring, granite countertops, matching cabinets throughout. There are pictures on the walls, but Mac doesn’t bother to stop and check what they are.

Riley clears the space from back to front, so Mac does the opposite. He clears the kitchen first, frowning at the absence of any sort of food, before moving on to the living room.

Mac stops dead in his tracks when he enters the bedroom. The singular bedroom. With a singular, queen-sized bed.

Oh no. This is not happening.

Mac shakes his head and rubs his eyes, hoping his mind is just playing tricks on him and that there’s actually two beds. Or a whole other room he missed before.

The one and only bed seems to mock him.

He walks back out, finding Riley already sitting at the kitchen table, turning on her laptop. “Uhh, Riles? There’s only—”

“One bed,” she finishes, not bothering to look up. “I know.”

Oh god. He can’t do this. He can’t. Not with his dignity still intact. Mac stammers, “I’ll, uhh, sleep on the couch. You can have it.”

That gets Riley’s attention. “Don’t be ridiculous. We’re going to be here for weeks. You’ll hurt your back sleeping on the couch that long. Just sleep with me.” Riley’s eyes widen as she realizes what she just said. “In the bed,” she quickly adds.

Mac ducks his head to hide his blush.

“What are you working on?” he asks in a feeble attempt to distract himself from their sleeping situation. Because it will definitely be a situation if Mac’s not careful.

“Connecting to the Wi-Fi,” Riley says in a slow, “What else would I be doing?” sort of way.

“Right.” Mac silently curses himself. Of course that’s what she’s doing. “Anyway, I’m assuming you already know this, since you probably opened the fridge too, but we have no food.”

“I saw.” She’s multitasking again, manicured fingers flying faster across her keyboard than Mac can keep track of. “Why don’t you unload our bags while I finish this, and then we can go.”

Unable to help feeling like he’s been dismissed, Mac complies without protest.

Soon they’re back in the car, headed to the grocery store, and the whole thing feels ridiculously domestic. Mac’s never been a fan of grocery shopping, but Riley makes it almost...fun. For starters, she’s not methodical about it the way Bozer and Desi are. But more than that, getting to spend time with her doing mundane, non-work stuff is a nice reminder that their relationship is more than just the job. They’re friends too.

Mac wishes there is a way to tell her all that without it sounding weird.

They come home, unload the groceries, and take Harley for a long walk, and that feels easy too. It feels normal, even though literally nothing about this situation is normal, and Mac already knows he’ll miss this when the op is over.

But normalcy ends when Riley beckons Mac to sit beside her at the kitchen table, and together they write an advertisement for their arms dealing business. Once they’re satisfied with it, Riley sends it off into the dark web, and there’s nothing to do but wait, like a spider after spinning her web.

The waiting is the worst part.

Mac is contemplating taking Harley for a second walk when Riley asks, “Want to help me make dinner?” He takes one look at her hands on her hips and the “you don’t actually have a choice” look on her face and knows he’ll be left to fend for himself if he doesn’t help now. Mac learned that the hard way back when he and Riley lived together.

“Sure.”

They work in comfortable silence. Mac chops vegetables and grates cheese for their quesadillas while Riley does the actual cooking part. Even though they are doing separate tasks, Mac is acutely aware of every move Riley makes, no matter how insignificant. Flexing her long, thin fingers around a knife. Itching the back of her calf with her foot. Dancing in place, spatula in hand, while she waits to flip the quesadillas sizzling in the pan.

Mac smiles softly. Her random little dances are cute. He’s noticed them more and more since realizing he has feelings for her, but if Mac is being honest, he’s always thought the dances are cute.

Riley hisses as she peeks under the tortilla, checking to see if it’s browned yet.

“You good?” Mac asks, frowning.

“Yeah, I touched the pan by accident.” Riley runs her thumb under cold water.

Her laptop dings while they eat. Wide-eyed, Mac glances at Riley. That was fast. She grimaces before sliding the laptop closer and checking the notification.

“Is it them?” he asks tentatively. That’s the hard part about this; in order for their business to look more legit, they had to just put an ad out and hope for a response, rather than target the terrorist organization directly.

Riley exhales. “No, it’s not them. It’s someone else.”

Swallowing another bite of quesadilla, Mac says, “I don’t know whether I’m relieved or if that’s worse.”

“Same.”

There are no more responses that night.

*****

Mac wakes up in the same position he fell asleep in—on his side, facing outward, with as much space between him and Riley as possible. When they crawled into bed the night before, Riley did the same.

Harley spent the night on the couch.

She’s a very guarded dog, Mac is slowly realizing. Tolerating, but not trusting. Mac supposes he would be like that too if he was a dog and he got stuck with a bunch of strangers after his human suddenly disappeared one day.

He makes coffee, feeds Harley breakfast, and takes a shower, all before Riley loses her battle with the snooze button and finally gets out of bed. While she showers, Mac takes Harley for a walk in hopes that the cool, spring air will ease the anxiety that took root the moment Riley released their ad into the void.

It doesn’t.

Dark, puffy clouds loom on the horizon, and the few birds Mac hears shriek at each other in warning. It looks like a storm is coming.

When Mac returns, he’s met with a grim expression, one he understands without Riley uttering a single word. “They answered,” she confirms.

“What did they say?” Unclipping Harley’s leash, Mac moves to stand behind Riley, resting his hands on the back of her chair. The scent of her shampoo tickles his nose, and he forces himself to ignore it and focus on what Riley’s saying.

“They want to meet. Today.”

“Time or place?”

Riley points at a small box on her screen. “Just an address.”

“What’s there?”

“A warehouse,” Riley says. “Owned by the same shell corporation other Phoenix techs already tied to the organization.”

“Not very clandestine, are they?”

“No, they’re not.” Riley looks up at him, her head bumping his sternum, and butterflies ricochet inside Mac’s rib cage. There’s something soft in Riley’s expression that makes Mac want to kiss her. “Are you ready for this?”

Mac sighs. “As ready as I ever am. Are you?”

“Yeah,” she says, but her confidence falters. Without thinking, Mac squeezes her shoulders in reassurance before walking away to change.

*****

The warehouse is located on the edge of the city, in an industrial area that has certainly seen better days. Even from a distance, Mac can see cobwebs decorating the warehouse windows and rust creeping up the roller doors. Aside from Riley, there’s not another soul in sight.

As per the directions the organization sent after Riley confirmed the meeting, Mac parks on the south side of the building, near the only functional-looking door. He doesn’t look at Riley as they get out of the car, instead desperately trying not to cringe at the cold, heavy weight of the gun holstered at his side, hidden beneath his jacket.

High-end arms dealers couldn’t walk around unarmed, unfortunately.

Although her hands are occupied with holding Harley’s leash, there’s a gun hidden beneath Riley’s suit jacket as well. Mac’s stomach churns. The second Riley emerged from their bedroom earlier wearing that jet black suit, she was a different person. She was wholly Genevieve Turner, and no matter how hard Mac tried, he couldn’t find even a single trace of his best friend beneath the icy exterior.

Locking their SUV, Mac smooths the lapels of his own black suit and slips into character as well.

The dark clouds Mac noticed earlier are directly overhead now. Mac has never believed in omens the way Jack did, but he can’t help hearing Jack’s voice in his head, warning him that black clouds are a sign of certain doom. Or something like that.

There’s no one inside the warehouse, at least as far as Mac can see. “Hello?” he calls, the word echoing slightly in the open space. Aside from a few random wooden crates, the room is empty.

A door slams, and then an older man comes into view. He’s probably in his late fifties, with graying hair and a beer belly his shirt doesn’t quite cover. The man swaggers like he owns the place, although Mac doubts the leader of a terrorist cell would deign to play tour guide.

No doubt there’s a quip on the edge of Riley’s tongue about entitled white men, but she doesn’t share it.

The man extends a hand to Mac in introduction. “Conrad.” His sneer doesn’t reach his eyes.

Mac frowns, keeping his hands at his sides. “Last name?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

What he’s about to say might screw everything up before it even starts, but Mac says it anyway. In his gut, he knows it’s the right call. “If it doesn’t matter, then we’re done here. My wife and I have no interest in entering a business relationship with someone too inexperienced to understand that trust is integral to any transaction.” Mac spins on his heel and strides toward the door, Riley falling into step beside him.

“Wait!” the man calls. They pause, turning around slowly. “Deacon. Conrad Deacon.” The man seems to know he’s already lost. Good. “Welcome to the cause.” He gestures for Mac and Riley to follow him.

Mac stands his ground. In his peripheral, Riley stands utterly still, the perfect mask of cool, collected neutrality. Almost bored, even. It’s scary how easily she becomes her cover.

“Come on now,” Conrad says, taking a single step forward. “We have much to discuss.”

That’s enough of the power play, Mac thinks, but just as he’s about to give in and follow Conrad, Riley utters a single, sharp command that rings through the room. “Sit.”

Harley obeys.

Riley’s lips curve in a cruel, taunting smile. “Then enlighten us.” Mac suppresses a shiver; he’s seen this side of Riley plenty of times before, watched her hone it over the years, but it’s still unnerving. Admittedly, it’s also kind of hot.

Conrad ignores her entirely. He croons, “Why don’t we start with your names?” It’s phrased like a question. It sounds like a question, but Mac sees the demand for what it really is.

Mac gestures to Riley. “This is my wife, Genevieve Turner. And my name is James.” His father’s name tastes like ash on Mac’s tongue.

“And the dog?”

“Killer,” Riley sneers. Mac isn’t sure if she’s kidding or not.

Again, Conrad doesn’t acknowledge her. “James, why don’t I give you the tour and explain what we do here.”

“We’ll go on the tour, but we are not here to join your cause.” It takes every ounce of Mac’s willpower to maintain his neutral tone. “All we care about is what you’d like us to provide and how much you’ll pay for it.”

Conrad doesn’t hide his displeasure. “Fine. Follow me.”

Mac and Riley are led through the open warehouse. The layout is straightforward and nearly impossible to get lost in. But after Conrad shows them a room full of rifles—countless hung on the walls, floor to ceiling, the rest in half-open crates—Mac finds himself counting the number of wooden shipping crates scattered around the building.

He doesn’t like his final number.

Arming terrorists doesn’t sit well with Mac, even if it serves a purpose. It makes him sick, knowing he will likely be indirectly responsible for their next attack.

Especially because those crates are no doubt full of the kind of rifles designed to kill people most effectively. The ones hanging on the wall are military grade, probably cutting-edge. Desi would know exactly what they are and how they work.

Trusting Riley is paying close attention, Mac only half listens to Conrad babble about the cause. But then the older man says something that stops Mac in his tracks. “Our country is being run into the ground by whiny do-nothings,” Conrad asserts, “who waste our money and spew garbage that some people matter more than others. Well, you know what? Hardworking, everyday Americans matter. But no,” he scoffs, “those damn liberals don’t like it when we remind them of the truth. Once we’re rid of them and the insufferables who elected them, this country will be better off.”

The ground sways under Mac’s feet. He knows these people believe this, read it in Matty’s extensive briefing notes. But it’s another thing entirely to hear someone say it to his face.

He can only imagine what Riley must be thinking.

Clearing his throat, Mac tries to redirect the conversation. “Like I said, we don’t care about your cause. Just tell us what you’re looking for, and we’ll be on our way.”

Conrad eyes him suspiciously, but complies. “We’re looking for something a little more than what you can get at the store, you know?”

Mac doesn’t, not exactly. He’ll have to ask Desi later. “I do,” he lies.

“Good. Here’s what we’re willing to pay for it.” He hands Mac a folded piece of paper, and Mac does a double take when he reads the number. There are a lot of zeroes. “And as a show of good faith, we’d like it delivered tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?” Riley splutters. Mac feels it then, the broiling rage slipping through a crack in her persona. He needs to get her out of there. Now. Not just to preserve the op, but for Riley’s wellbeing. Some audacity Matty has making Riley play nice with men like this.

Mac slides his hands into his pockets, using the movement as a cover to brush his knuckles against Riley’s fist. I know. I’m here. I’m sorry.

For the first time, Conrad addresses Riley directly. “Yes. Tomorrow. Unless that’s something you can’t do?”

“We can do that,” she replies calmly, and the difference between her reactions is like night and day. As quickly as that crack appeared, it was gone.

“Excellent.” Conrad takes another step toward Riley, offering to shake hands, but Harley’s low, menacing growl keeps him at bay. Rewarding the dog with a quick scratch on the head, Riley closes the gap and shakes Conrad’s still-outstretched hand.

“It’s a deal,” she says. Following suit, Mac shakes Conrad’s hand as well and follows Riley out the door, neither of them uttering another word.

Mac drives. One look at Riley’s trembling fist decides for him.

By the time the warehouse disappears from the rearview mirror, he can’t take the silence anymore. “Hey,” Mac starts, but Riley cuts him off with a hand.

“Not until we’re inside.”

They hit every single red light between the warehouse and the apartment, and Mac anxiously taps the steering wheel. Raindrops land on the windshield. They’re small at first, but soon the drops are large and numerous enough to refract the streetlights, and Mac struggles to see where he’s going. He adjusts the windshield wipers over and over, never landing on the right speed.

Too slow. Too fast. Too slow. Too fast.

Mac settles on a setting that’s slightly too fast, and the squeak of rubber on glass nearly matches his heart thudding in his chest.

Riley stares straight ahead, unmoving, unblinking. Mac wants to reach out, to let a gentle touch say what he verbally can’t, but the road is slick enough to make him keep two hands on the wheel. We’re almost there, he reassures himself.

By the time he parks, it’s pouring hard enough that the ten second walk from the car to the door soaks them to the bone. Riley’s hands shake as she unlocks the apartment door.

Once they’re inside and Mac unclips Harley’s leash, Riley turns to him with pained, pleading eyes. His heart breaking all over again, Mac draws her in for a long, tight hug. She doesn’t say anything. She doesn’t have to.

Mac just cradles the back of her head and sways gently, wishing he could fix the world for her.

Neither pulls away, even when Riley suddenly says, “If Conrad was smart, he would’ve had someone bug our car while he paraded us around the warehouse. I don’t think he’s actually smart enough to do that, but we should check first, just in case.”

Mac curses himself for not thinking of that. “Good call.” He rubs Riley’s back, hoping the gesture is soothing. “I hate the way he treated you,” he snarls. “Like you weren’t even worth acknowledging.”

“Welcome to being a woman.”

It was more than that. They both know it. But neither say it.

*****

“You need what?” Matty shrieks over the phone.

Mac winces. “Sorry.” He’d called Desi first, to ask what kind of guns Conrad meant with his innuendo, and received a verbal lashing for not asking any follow-up questions. But she made her best guess anyway. Now on the phone with Matty, it doesn’t take even a single brain cell to know that her reaction will be much, much worse.

“He wants us to prove ourselves,” Riley adds. “As a show of good faith.” The words come out dripping in venom, but their boss doesn’t comment. Mac takes a second to study her; Riley changed into leggings and an oversized flannel shirt, and there are still remnants of dark makeup smudges under her eyes. Now, she’s sitting on the kitchen counter with her knees tucked into her chest. It’s weird to see her take up so little space.

Matty sighs, deeply and loudly in a way conveys her annoyance more than words ever could. “Fine. A few weeks ago, Border Control confiscated a huge shipment of smuggled guns near El Paso, so I’ll see if we can borrow those. But next time, Blondie, don’t make promises you can’t keep.” He doesn’t correct Matty in that it was Riley who made the deal. That would only add fuel to the fire.

“Thank you,” he says, and Matty hangs up. Mac runs a hand through his damp hair. “That went well.” Riley’s lips twitch, but it’s not the amused reaction he hopes for. He’s at a complete loss regarding what to say to her, so Mac gently asks, “What can I do?”

Riley slides off the counter, and Mac reaches for her automatically, although he doesn’t actually touch her; his hand hovers just beside Riley’s elbow. She doesn’t shrink away, but she makes no move to touch him either.

“Help me put him and everyone like him in a deep, dark hole where they can’t hurt anybody. And then just…” she trails off, taking a deep breath. “Keep being you.”

With that, she walks away, leaving Mac alone in the kitchen, racking his brain to figure out what that last part means.

*****

Later that night, Mac tosses and turns, replaying Conrad’s words. Once we’re rid of them and the insufferables who elected them, this country will be better off. They seem off-kilter, like what the man said and what he really meant are misaligned. Mac sighs, rubbing his face.

Another bolt of lightning illuminates the bedroom, and Mac automatically counts the seconds until he hears thunder rumbling in the distance. The storm is moving closer.

Beside him, Riley lies on her back with her eyes closed, although her breathing is too light for her to be asleep. Mac wonders if her mind is just as loud and chaotic as his.

For Riley’s sake, he hopes it’s not.

*****

Sleep never finds Mac.

The storm rages all through the night, but by the time dawn arrives, the thunder and wind dissipate, leaving just the steady downpour. The clouds are dark enough that Mac can hardly tell the sun even bothered to rise this morning.

When Riley’s alarm goes off, it’s like the shrill tone is mocking Mac for being awake. Riley groans as she shuts it off.

“Morning,” he mumbles. His throat hurts. He needs water. “Did you sleep well?”

Another groan. “No.”

“At least you slept,” Mac mutters.

Riley rolls onto her side, drawing one of the extra pillows into her chest. “Do you always toss and turn that much?”

It was his fault, he realizes, that she didn’t sleep. Mac suddenly feels guilty. “Sorry. And no.”

He expects Riley to be upset at being kept awake, but she isn’t. With a look that just might be understanding, she softly asks, “What were you thinking about?”

Mac can’t say that his thoughts whip around his mind like raindrops in last night’s storm. Not without sounding crazy, at least. So instead he says, “I don’t even know. I just have a bad feeling about this.”

“Me too,” Riley admits. “It feels off.” Her eyes are heavy, and Mac’s had enough early mornings with Riley to know it’s not just the lack of sleep weighing her down.

“Go back to sleep. I can handle the delivery.”

Riley rolls her eyes. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’m not letting you do that by yourself.”

He doesn’t argue. “Okay.”

A moment passes between them. It’s been happening more and more lately—holding eye contact a little too long, sharing smirks when no one else is looking, stealing moments where it’s just the two of them and nothing else matters. Each one gives him hope that there’s not a wall between them, but instead, a door. Someone just has to be brave enough to open it.

Sitting up, Riley quipps, “Just don’t make me regret letting you sleep in the bed with me.” Mac snorts.

“No promises.”

~ Tag List ~ Want to be added? Send me an ask.

@angelinanao

@annmariestuff

@dreambelievergeek

@emilyscotson

@fangirlfreak08

@hellishrose

@i-cant-think-of-a-name-15

@justaghostmonument

@losingitovermacriley

@macrileyedits

@multi-fandomshipper101

@mylifequotesshowallofthem

@nikki-1607

@orange-cat-vet

@penny114

@redjedistarfighter

@sxrein

@thecarrieonokay

@tom-hunter-summah

@whatsabex

#beth writes #macriley #macgyver #macgyver fanfiction #angus macgyver #riley davis #looking through a window au

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wickedapollo · 4 years ago

Text

This is going to become a Saint-14 blog you watch. Everything is going to be become Saint. Everything. Oh my God, I love that man. I can't. I can't even.

Anyways, this is a Dawning gift for my friends [@lady-efriyeet @galexion @nyllius ]! It may come out before then, I have no idea currently, as I write this. I am very motivated for this one, unlike my promised Shiro oneshot... Oops. I'll get to that one in due time I swear.

Saint-14 x Hunter! Reader

Warnings : angst and [reads smudged writing on hand] flurf

The wind nips at your unarmed arms, snaking up your biceps and brushing against your throat. Your fingertips are numb with the chill, you flex them but it is all for not. They aren't frozen just cold. You sigh, closing your eyes and hanging your head.

You can't remember the last time you had a day off, it seems all you do is move about the system, killing things, saving people, and then you move on. Move on as though a leaf upon the wind who's only motive is to please such that hurries you. It is a sad existence, you think to yourself, that I am only something used to fight the battles that everyday people cannot. The mere idea that you are useless makes your heart sink in your chest. Perhaps if it sinks lower it may fall through you and hit the floor, shattering with all your prizes, all you hold dear.

Your eyes wander back to the silent bazaar. It is, after all, only two A.M. and most sane people are asleep. Your thoughts and insomnia keep you awake, brushing at the fingertips of sleep while your body falls more and more awakened. You hate nights like these, when sleep is scarce and there is no one to talk to.

If only your prayers could talk back.

You wrap your arms around your ribs as you straighten to look up at the traveler. The pristine machine god offers you no solution. No end to your sleepless night. Only the same silence as it has always treated you.

"Голубь?" It is a small, almost whisper-like voice. Scratchy and groggy from sleep. Like what you had once imagined dark chocolate would sound, not that you had imagined voices for the food you ate, that was preposterous, but it was a way to describe it. "What are you doing awake?"

"I can't sleep." You murmur, more to yourself than to him. You watch him rise groggily onto his metal forearms and squint into the darkness of your bedroom. His optics adjust in brightness, much like eyes adjusting to the dark. He sits there for less time than you expect before he pushes himself up and looks around slowly.

"It's twenty-five til three." He states, and for a moment he seems amazed by the time. Perhaps the fact that it is so late and you are still up? Who knows. He pulls the blankets off of his lap to stand, boards creaking under his feet as he does so. He easily towers over you, optics blinking as he adjusts to the lighting.

You can’t help but shrink further into the linen curtains. You know Saint means well, he always does, you don’t feel like being berated for not sleeping. Not that Saint would do that, but you know he’s going to ask questions. It’s his way of looking after you, you know. You appreciate it sometimes.

However, he doesn’t, instead he wraps his arms around you and pulls you into the soft cotton of his t-shirt. You would expect, like most metal things, Saint would be cold to the touch. He never is, and no matter how many times you’ve touched him, you are always surprised at how warm he really is. You hope all exos are this way, though you could never truly be sure, and are too afraid to test your new theory.

“Perhaps I can help?” He offers, in the soft tone that only he can have. It reverberates throughout his chest as his hands gently smooth over your back. Truthfully they don’t have to go far, Saint’s hands are huge. You barely have enough room for one, let alone both of them. You don’t complain though, only pressing your face into his chest with a nod.

You’re moving before you can truly process it. Being pulled towards the bed with little protest, in no hurry to leave your titan’s embrace. He seems in even less a hurry to let you go. Though that is Saint, always has been, always doting and encouraging.

Strong hands lift you up, and though he doesn't say it, what he wants is as clear to you as the night sky. You sluggishly wrap your legs around his waist and wrap your arms around his neck. He moves his hands under your thighs and sets his chin on your shoulder as he walks. There's something soothing about it, perhaps it is why babies are rocked to sleep.

His warmth is intoxicating, like sitting by an open fire and reading. Like being curled in a fuzzy blanket while the wind and rain howl outside the window, something so natural and peaceful that it may have lulled you to sleep right there- If you were not so keen on staying awake to avoid the nightmares. Though your eyes droop and your limbs are heavy, you force yourself to stay awake.

If you wait long enough, Saint will let you load up on caffeine and give you disappointing looks. You could handle that, you hope. It's just that you are so tired, it's almost criminal. It's to the point you feel like crying- for no reason- at anything.

Soon enough your ambition falters, you close your eyes. They were just so heavy, you argue to yourself, not even Atlas could have held them open.

Soon your arms relax around Saint, hands falling limply from his shoulders to hang lifelessly. Your fingers rest against the warm metal of his arms, twitching as he moves. It's only then you notice, somehow, he's humming.

You try to count his tune, as a last resort of staying awake. You lose it at six, arguing over what number you had missed to not get an eight count- and you pass out then and there. Slipping into the dark, like a warm blanket.

Saint, in all honesty, isn’t ready to put you down. He’s afraid you’ll wake up if he stops moving, it’s happened before. Though that was about a year ago, and he had unceremoniously tossed you on the bed, thinking nothing of the fact that you were human and very, very fragile.

He sighs, looking over at the clock on the bedside table. You really didn't use it, never had need for an alarm, that's what you had your Ghost for. But he used it periodically, like now, seeing that it read three a.m even. The titan finally lays you down, pulling the covers over your chilled body and up to your chin. When he's satisfied he kisses your forehead, metal lips lingering along your warm brow. You could be coming down with a cold, he thinks, one more thing to worry about…

You resituate to hug a pillow close to your chest, burying your face into it's softness. It makes Saint smile. You may be Saladin's Young Wolf, who fights with honor and Valor. A god killer. However, you are also his. His guardian, his love, and his inspiration. And he is soft for you.

The large titan moves to the window, glancing out into the empty street with contempt. There is a light on across the street, with shadows moving to and from in front of the window. He smiles, someone's wrapping presents for the Dawning still. He watches them move back and forth until the light goes out.

He leans back into the apartment and shuts the open window without question. It's late, he should sleep, too. He draws the curtains and pads back to his side of the bed. You've already stolen most of the blankets, but he can't find it in him to take them from you.

Instead he lays there, quiet as he listens to you breathe and snore softly. What a beautiful way to spend tonight, he thinks, when the room is warm.

However, now it is his turn not to find sleep. He tosses and turns for nearly twenty minutes. He sighs tiredly at the white ceiling. Perhaps if he counts the popcorn bits he can sleep. So he starts, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5…

No dice.

An arm snakes around his waist sleepily and you pull him close. You're nowhere near fully conscious, just awake enough to be a sleepy, cuddly mess. He turns his head to look at you in surprise as you nestle into his side and nose along his jugular vein, or coolant tube… either way.

"Did I wake you, Love?"

"Mmm?" You reply, eyes falling closed as you wrap a leg around his thigh. You still as you have found comfort in the position. Saint can't hide his smile, accepting the exchange and wrapping his arms around you. You're warm, and rightfully so, you're swaddled in blankets like a fluff tortilla.

His fingers sneak into your fluffy, messy hair. Carding through it and watching it fall back into place again and again. He lets out sigh, sounding more like a purr than an actual breath. His optics dim in the lighting, and he yawns.

"Sleep tight, Моя любовь."

#destiny hunter #destiny #destiny 2 #Saint-14 x Reader #saint 14 #Saint #Hunter #X reader #reader insert #happy dawning

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noona-clock · 4 years ago

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Traveling Love (Collab) - Part 4, Final Chapter

Genre: Fluffy/Romantic AU

Pairing: Nam Joo Hyuk x You (Female!Reader)

Warnings: None

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, Masterlist | Words: 2,094

A/N: Welcome to the third series in the monthly Love In Fours Ways collab with myself, @jackiejacks923 @prettywordsyouleft & @this-song-thats-only-for-you . We have all taken inspiration from 4 illustrations (linked below), and during the last week of the month, we will each be sharing a 4-part mini-series based on those drawings.

Credit to: Puuung - Love Is In The Small Things

Part 4: Tucking Her into a Perfect Sleeping Burrito

You’d never experienced the feeling of Post-Vacation Blues quite as acutely as you were now.

When you’d planned this trip over the last several weeks, you’d had a feeling it was going to be wonderful -- not only because your destination had too many fun and exciting things to do and see and visit and eat, but because you were going with someone you loved. Plus, Joo Hyuk had really needed this vacation.

But you hadn’t been prepared for just how wonderful.

If you could’ve designed your perfect vacation with no limitations, it wouldn’t have been as perfect as the one you’d just taken with Joo Hyuk. You had absolutely never been on a trip like it, and you would absolutely never go on another trip like it again.

It’s not like you did anything extremely special or note-worthy; you explored the city, you took pictures, you ate delicious food, you saw beautiful scenery. Very typical vacation stuff!

Something about it had just been... special, and no amount of money or planning would ever be able to recreate this past week.

...However.

And you were very reluctant to admit this however, and you certainly wouldn’t admit it out loud to Joo Hyuk.

But. However.

All of the planning and the fact that you’d known how very much Joo Hyuk had needed a break from work had built up quite a bit of pressure for this vacation to be as perfect as it could be.

It had been as perfect as it could be, but perfect never comes easily.

You’d worked hard to help it become perfect, and now that it was all over and you were very soon to arrive back home...

You were feeling it.

All of the work you’d done before the trip, all of the activities you’d checked off during the trip, and the unconscious demand lurking in the back of your head for the trip to be just what Joo Hyuk needed... It was all coming to the tipping point the closer you got to your apartment, and by the time you stepped in through the front door, you felt like you were going to collapse with exhaustion.

“It does feel good to be home, though,” Joo Hyuk said, and his tone made it obvious that hadn’t been the first thing he’d said.

Were you already so tired that you were zoning out and missing full sentences?

“Mm,” you hummed, deciding not to let on that you were kind of about to drop right here on the floor and fall asleep -- that you were so exhausted, you’d completely missed the first part of whatever your boyfriend had said.

“I’m just going to check my email,” Joo Hyuk murmured as you began to lug your suitcase back toward your shared bedroom.

Again, you simply hummed in response -- and that’s how you knew your brain was fried. Joo Hyuk checking his email just after arriving home from vacation should have made you stop and warn him that he at least needed to wait until tomorrow to get back into Work Mode. But, no. You just hummed and trudged through your apartment to go unpack.

When you reached your bedroom, you let your suitcase fall to the floor, and you dropped onto your knees beside it to unzip it.

Your arms felt like lead -- or like they were stuck in Jello -- as you began to take out your clothes and put them in a pile next to you.

If you were in your right mind, you would have taken your suitcase closer to your clothes hamper to cut out the middle man.

But you were, apparently, just too tired to think efficiently at the moment.

Joo Hyuk’s voice suddenly cut through the silence, and you jumped a little --

...Wait.

How had he checked his email so quickly?

And why had his sudden presence startled you that much?

...Had you been --

“Why didn’t you tell me you were that tired?” Joo Hyuk said softly as he crouched down next to you.

Well, then. You had just fallen asleep while unpacking your suitcase.

You knew you were exhausted, but you didn’t realize you were that exhausted.

“Sorry,” you murmured, your brow furrowed as Joo Hyuk reached to pick you up. He slid one arm behind your knees, the other across your back, and stood up to carry you bridal-style to your bed. “I guess it just hit me all at once when we got home.”

“No, don’t apologize,” he replied, carefully leaning over and setting you on top of the bed. “You did a lot of work, and we were pretty busy this whole week. You just get some rest, and I’ll finish unpacking, okay?”

The second your head hit the soft cushion of your pillow, your eyes began to droop. You weren’t sure if you even responded to him, and the last thing you remember was Joo Hyuk reaching for the throw blanket at the end of the bed.

An indeterminate length of time later, the scent of something cooking tickled your nose. You smelled it first before you even blinked your eyes open, but when you did open your eyes, you found that not only had Joo Hyuk covered you with a blanket...

He had wrapped the blanket around you like the tortilla of a burrito.

A smile tugged at your lips, and you nestled into the blanket even further, letting out a soft sigh of contentment.

You were wrapped up in your blanket like a burrito, the apartment smelled like the most delicious dinner was cooking, and you had just taken a much-needed nap.

There was no way you could be even remotely upset right now. Not even the tiniest bit.

With a groan, you began to sit up so you could unroll yourself and make your way to the kitchen. The smell of dinner was just too tempting to resist, and your stomach was on the verge of letting out a rather audible grumble.

But before you could even lift one corner of the blanket around you, you heard footsteps shuffling toward the bedroom. And when your gaze landed on the doorway, you saw Joo Hyuk had appeared gingerly carrying a steaming bowl, his hands covered by your favorite floral pot holders.

You managed to inch up into a seated position by the time he got to the side of the bed, and you asked, “What’s this?”

“I thought I would make you some soup,” he answered, perching on the edge of the mattress and shifting the bowl to cradle it in one hand. After slipping the pot holder from his now free hand, he took the spoon from inside the bowl and dipped it into the soup.

“Babe, you don’t have to feed me,” you chuckled, though you still accepted the spoonful he offered, slurping the soup carefully. Once you’d swallowed it, feeling the comforting warmth sliding down your throat, you added, “I’m not sick! I’m just exhausted.”

Joo Hyuk held out another spoonful of soup for you, waiting until you’d taken it before replying with, “Yeah, but you took care of me this whole week -- and a long time before then, too. It’s time for me to take care of you.”

“I did not take care of you,” you retorted with a soft grin.

“You absolutely did.”

“I just planned our trip! Once we actually got there, we did everything together.”

Your boyfriend let out a soft sigh and leaned over to set the bowl down on the nightstand. “I know, but... I know it hasn’t been easy because I’ve been so stressed out.”

“It really --”

“Just let me finish,” he interrupted, shooting you a playful smirk.

You pressed your lips together and snuggled back into your pillows.

“I know I’m not always the easiest person to live with because I don’t share things easily. Or... at all. Unless you force me to. And no one should have to do that to their partner, so I’m sorry I clam up when I’m stressed. But if it annoys you or worries you, literally no one would know. You either do an amazing job of hiding it or...”

He trailed off, so you took this opportunity to say something.

“Or I just know that’s how you are, and I love you. Unconditionally,” you said quietly.

Yes, sometimes it did annoy you that Joo Hyuk had such a hard time sharing how he felt. Sometimes you did feel like you were nagging him to be more open and forcing him to tell you what emotions he was experiencing.

But... you also understood that emotions can be super tricky. And complicated. And hard to express. Everyone is different, and everyone handles emotions differently. So, if you loved Joo Hyuk unconditionally, you had to accept that he was one of those people who just had a difficult time with them.

If you didn’t accept that, wouldn’t it be a condition to your love? You only loved him if he expressed his emotions freely?

So, you mustered all your patience and you gave him time. You helped him out as much as you could and stepped away when you felt like you needed to.

Joo Hyuk smiled down at his lap, shaking his head gently. “I... don’t know how I got so lucky finding you, but...” He lifted his gaze, looking at you with more love in his eyes than you really even knew what to do with. “I hope you know how much you mean to me, and that I never want to take you for granted.”

“Of course, I do,” you murmured, finally wriggling your hands free from your blanket burrito so you could cradle his ridiculously handsome face in your palms. “I know you, and I know that you letting me in is just one way you show me that you care. You may not realize it, but you do a lot of little things, and I learned pretty quickly that they all mean you love me.”

Joo Hyuk grinned bashfully, and you leaned in to capture his lips in a brief kiss.

“And I love you, too,” you whispered. “And I really love when you turn me into a blanket burrito and make soup for me, even if I’m not sick.”

Your boyfriend chuckled lightly, his breathy laugh grazing over your lips.

“It’s really good soup, by the way,” you told him as you pulled away and reached for the bowl on the nightstand.

“Thanks,” he replied, setting one of the pot holders in your lap so you could put the bowl there. “I used that cookbook you got me for Christmas last year.”

Your eyes widened, and you beamed over at him. “You did?!” you marveled. “Oh, now I really know you love me.”

“Please don’t take that to mean I want another one this year,” he laughed, shaking his head. “One cookbook is enough.”

“No, you can never have too many cookbooks!” you argued playfully. “Just like you can never have too many blankets.”

“That is also not true. We’re only two people, we can’t use that many --”

“But what if I want to be a different blanket burrito every day of the week?”

Joo Hyuk quirked a brow at you and opened his mouth to reply... but he stopped himself. He leaned over and pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

“You’re right,” he mumbled before he got up and headed back out of the bedroom. “You’re right. You always are.”

Rather than crow triumphantly after him, you simply smiled down at your bowl of soup. You bit your bottom lip to stop yourself from squealing, and that’s when you knew without a shadow of a doubt that Joo Hyuk would be by your side for as long as you both shall live.

After two years, he could still make you bite your lip and squeal like a young girl with a schoolyard crush. He could still make you smile like a kid on Christmas morning. He could still make your heart and stomach flip just like he could the first time you’d met him.

...I mean, you’d already known he was your Forever, long before this. But you know what I mean. You just knew even more.

At home, on vacation, stressed out, in a blanket burrito, with a bowl of soup, out on the balcony, under the stars...

Whenever, wherever, however -- it didn’t matter.

Forever and ever, even more, he was yours.

#kwritersworldnet #nam joo hyuk scenarios #nam joo hyuk imagines #nam joo hyuk au #nam joo hyuk fluff #nam joo hyuk fanfic #kdrama scenarios #kdrama imagines #kdrama au #kdrama fluff #kdrama fanfic #kdrama actor #korean actor #nam joo hyuk

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tessxblxckthorn · 4 years ago

Text

you’re more to me

@juulies and again: happy holidays love!! (2/2)

a short juke soulmate au cause meg wrote that she likes the trope so i thought why not... english isn’t my first language and I haven’t written in quite some time so please have mercy and enjoy!

It took her an entire day to realise. Julie could see colors. Actual, vibrant colors. Not the dull, grey-ish colors she had seen her entire life but the bright red of the painted dahlias on her bedroom walls, the vivid blue of the Los Angeles sky, the deep violet of the string that was still braided into her hair from yesterday's performance in the Orpheum.

It had all been so chaotic that Julie hadn't had a minute to breath and, well, realise that she had met her soulmate.

Her soulmate.

Of course she knew about soulmates and that, after finding yours and having direct skin contact with them, you could see every beautiful color that exists. But she also knew that many people never, ever found theirs. Sure, her parents had been soulmates, but they were lucky. Flynn's parents weren't soulmates, Carries definitely hadn't been.

While there were a lot of soulmate-couples, people just didn't want to get their hopes up just to never find theirs. So that's why, at the young age of 10, Flynn and Julie had stopped believing that they would eventually find their perfect match, simply because this wasn’t a perfect world.

And now, at age 16, Julie was laying in her bedroom on her bed, staring at the ceiling, wondering how on earth she could’ve missed meeting her soulmate. Because that was what had happened, right? She must have bumped into them at the show or while running out on the street when she thought the guys had died...or stopped existing or whatever...or when she went home with her dad and Carlos or-

There was a loud bang coming from her closed door followed by a groan and a curse.

“Come in!”, Julie called out, sitting up and pushing her messy hair out of her face.

“Damn it”, Alex groaned and closed the door behind him. “Still haven't adjusted completely to being alive again, thought I could just materialize through the door.”

Julie laughed softly. “Yeah, I heard that.”

“Pretty sure your dad thinks we’re absolute weirdos now, Reggie just said good-bye in the kitchen and then jumped up before realising he couldn't poof out.”

Jup, that sounded like Reggie.

“Anyway, the boys and I wanted to drive back to the Orpheum, you wanna come?”

“Weren't you at the Orpheum this morning?”, Julie asked confused, while starting to fold her costume from yesterday's performance.

“True, but...Lukethinkshemethissoulmatethere”, Alex muttered under his breath, looking at the, suddenly so interesting, blanket that was thrown over Julie's bed.

Said girl froze up. Had she heard correctly? “Uhm Luke- he- what?”

Alex sighed and pushed his blond hair back, a habit he did a lot when he was anxious. “Ok, so- I mean- Luke- He- he can see colors now, like the kind of colors you can only see after you met your soulmate? And he can see the colors since this morning so he thinks he met them while we were back at the Orpheum to meet with Willie.”

“Oh…”, Julie said, dropping her hands that were still folding into her lap. No, it was stupid. Of course she hadn't thought or hoped her soulmate would be Luke. He was dead. Well, now he was alive again, but that wasn't the point. The point was that Luke Patterson couldn't be her soulmate. Eventhough, for some dumb, idiotic reason, her heart apparently had wished he was.

“Yeah…”, Alex agreed, awkwardly fingering at the blanket. He wasn’t dumb, in fact, he was probably the most observant of the three boys and it wasn’t difficult to identify the way Luke looked at Julie. Not only at the performances but all the time.

“Uhm- I- Flynn’s coming over so…”, Julie trailed off. “We’re having a girls night.” More like a “freaking-out-about-who-could-be-Julie’s-soulmate”-night or a “crying-over-the-fact-that-Luke’s-not-her-soulmate”- night. She hadn’t decided yet, but judging by the lump in her throat it seemed that the latter was more possible.

“Oh ok. Yeah, sure.”

Julie nodded slowly.

“Okayyyyy”, Alex scratched his neck. “Then I'm going to go now. With the boys. To the Orpheum.” She nodded again.

By the time he had closed her bedroom door again, after softly smiling at her with his annoyingly nice “I-know-what’s-going-on-and-you-can-always-talk-to-me-but-I-don’t-want-to-push-you”-look, Julie was fighting the tears.

The last two hours, after she realized that she could see colors, she had spent thinking about every person that could or couldn't be her soulmate. It couldn't be anyone she actually knew, because she had had direct skin contact with all of them at some point before yesterday. All of them except Luke, Reggie and Alex. Not Alex, because he’s gay and terribly in love with this Willie she had yet to meet. Not Reggie, because he was like a brother to her and he still couldn't see colors.

And not Luke, because he had met his soulmate this morning. And not last night like she apparently had, simply because she hadn’t left the house since then.

So it had to be some stranger, right? And still, everytime she thought about her soulmate, she thought about Luke’s piercing hazel eyes, his perfect smile and his soft brown hair and-

“Oh my god”, Flynn shouted, slamming the door shut behind her. “You can’t just text me that you met your soulmate without any details!”

Julie flinched and instantly shushed her. “Flynn! No one else knows! Shut up!”

“Oh Julie, I’m not stupid. Ray and Carlos went grocery shopping and the boys just passed me, saying they want to go to the Orpheum or something? Whatever, I need the details!”, Julie's best friend threw her bag beside Julie’s desk and jumped onto her bed.

“Who is it?”

“I don’t know.”

Flynn laughed loudly and then looked back to Julie. She went quiet. “No”, she said. “No, no, cause I thought I just heard that you said you didn’t know who your soulmate is but I must have misunderstood.”

Julie sighed and layed back down next to Flynn. “You don't know? How can you not know? You met your soulmate, are able to see colors now and tell me you don't know who it was? How can you not know?”

“I don’t know.”

“Julie…”

“Seriously, Flynn. I don't know, okay? And it's horrible! I didn’t even realize I’m able to see colors now till this morning. I don’t remember suddenly being able to see colors after touching someone, okay? It was all so chaotic yesterday. The performance. The boys missing. Then I thought the boys were gone. Then they weren’t. Then they nearly died of those jolts in the garage. Then they were suddenly alive again. Then I had to explain to my dad why the hologram band from Sweden is in the garage. It was all messy and chaotic and I must have missed it.”

“Breathe, Julie.”

“I am breathing!”, Julie cried out, hiding her face in one of her pillows.

She felt Flynn soothingly patting her shoulder.

“So it isn't Luke?”, the girl said softly after a while. Julie choked and pushed down her tears. She shook her head, still buried in the pillow.

“But you thought he would be.” Julie went still and then shook her head again. “I guess I hoped it would be him.”

“Oh…”, Flynn mumbled and went back to rubbing her best friend's shoulder. While she had been against bonding with Luke and more one Team Nick, she knew that Julie had fallen for the ghost-boy. And, well, she’d mostly been against Luke because he was a ghost...which he wasn’t anymore.

“So did you tell the boys?”, Flynn asked hesitantly when Julie showed her face again and sat back against the headboard.

“Nope”, she croaked and cleared her throat. “I wanted to think and then tell the boys. But then they were busy trying to find Luke’s soulmate.”

Flynn opened her mouth and closed it again. “Wait so Luke met his soulmate too? When?”

“This morning at the Orpheum apparently”, Julie answered bitterly.

“This morning? Is he sure?”, Julie shrugged. “I don’t know, that’s what Alex said.”

“Ok, so you haven’t talked to him or, you know, touched him? I mean, what if he only realized this morning he could see colors? Touching him-”

“would either dull or brighten the colors.”, Julie finished, looking at Flynn wearily. “I forgot about that part to be honest.” Flynn was beaming. “But, Flynn, I really don’t want to get my hopes up just to be disappointed again, okay? And who knows, maybe Luke found his soulmate already.”

“Nuh-uh, you gotta be optimistic, okay? Everyone can see the way you two look at each other!” Julie frowned slightly. God, how she wanted to believe Luke could be her soulmate...she just didn't want her heart to be crushed when reality set in.

“Anyway, we gotta change that topic because we can’t do anything about it right now. But before we start the Netflix marathon we gotta go to the kitchen or I’ll starve.”

Julie laughed and rolled her eyes but followed her friend.

The two girls were in the middle of topping off their tortilla chips platter with cheese when the front door was opened.

“So, let me sup it up”, they heard Alex's confused voice. “You don't actually know you met your soulmate this morning, you just didn't realize before then that you could see colors? So you meeting and touching them also could’ve been yesterday. Which actually seems more plausible, if you think about-”, the blond boy stopped abruptly, Luke next to him, when he saw the girls sitting at the counter frozen up and...listening.

“But the only person you touched yesterday, other than us, is Julie so- ohhhh”, Reggie bumped into Luke and shut up when he saw their faces.

There was silence for about five seconds in which everyone in the room realized what Reggies statement meant before Flynn hopped from her chair. “Reggie, Alex, you have to help me pick out a movie upstairs. Now.”

And Julie and Luke, still frozen up, were alone.

“So-”

“I-”, they started at the same time. Julie blushed. “You go first.”

Luke nodded awkwardly and walked towards her, sitting down on the chair opposite to her.

“I didn't realize it till today. I don’t know why i thought it might’ve been someone at the meeting with Willie today but I thought you couldn’t see colors and I didn’t want to get my hopes up, and-”, he was cute when he rambled, Julie thought, but stopped him from any more talking by reaching out and taking his hand that was on the counter in front of her. Every color in the room seemed to get even brighter momentarily and Julie gaped. Luke did too.

“So, that was fool-proof.” Luke laughed lightly and slowly took her hand in his. Julie couldn’t stop herself from smiling.

“I didn’t realize it till this morning either. And i wanted to think first but then Alex told me you had met your soulmate this morning but i had to have met my soulmate yesterday so I thought- wait, did you just say you didn’t want to get your hopes up?”

Luke grinned but blushed. “I kinda thought it was obvious, you know, that you mean a lot to me.”

Julie’s heart seemed to beat faster and she squeezed his hand. “Well, apparently everyone but me realized it but...it’s mutual, Luke.”

The boy smiled widely and pressed a shy kiss to their joined hands. “Good to know.”

Julie swore she never smiled that hard ever before.

#netflix #jatp #jatpdaily #secret santa #julie and the phantoms #Julie and Luke #jatp julie #juke imagine #luke patterson #luke jatp #julie molina

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jeonqukie · 5 years ago

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OUT OF LOVE / 04.

SYNOPSIS / During a house warming get together with your closest friends, an unexpected guest shows up and attempts to catch your best friend’s attention. Too bad he’s too focused on making sure you’re not pushing your limits.

FEATURING / Jeon Jungkook.

GENRES / Jungkook being the biggest gamer & best friend ever, lots of angst and secret feelings, lots of fluff especially from our soft bunny, and eventual smut.

WARNINGS / This part will contain alcohol consumption, graphic language, and mature themes. Warnings will be updates accordingly.

WORD COUNT / 5.6k

TABLE OF CONTENTS / To be redirected and get the latest on the story, click on the table of contents.

NOTES / Hi all! I hope everyone is doing well especially the current state of the world right now. First, I want to apologize for the delay on any updates whatsoever. I’m currently stuck in a rut and have been doing anything I can to get the spark again or the same excitement again when I write. It honestly comes spontaneously and occurs for a brief period of time which is why even short drabbles like these take so long for me to write. Second, this new norm has been a difficult adjustment for me, so I’m trying my best to get accustomed to this. I hope everyone is doing well. But I’m so glad with how this part has turned out, imo. This was nothing like I imagined to begin with but I’m very happy with the end product bc it gives me something to work with. The next part may be the final part but it will be much longer maybe? Anyway, feedback is very much appreciated. Thank you so much for reading through this mess, but I really do appreciate anyone who actually takes their time and reads through my work. Stay safe and healthy. ( ◡‿◡ *)

The housewarming party was just a suggestion; that’s all it was — a simple, silly joke that was meant to go over Jungkook’s head. But he didn’t think that it was such a bad idea at all.

“But we’ve literally moved in like, a month and a half ago. Kookie, you’ve been living here for nearly 2 years, you just moved to a new unit.” You reasoned with him. “I think it’s just an excuse to throw a party.”

The both of you sat in the living room couch with the bowl of popcorn placed on your stomach. It was one of the rare occasions that you and Jungkook had coinciding free time together. Normally, the both of you would decide on a movie together, but Jungkook had been invested in a brand new video game. So he had hooked up his gaming console to the living room television while he decided to go through the first play through while you listened to him explain what he was doing.

“I mean, it’d be cool! Plus, I heard from Mr. Lee from 3B that the manager would be out of town next weekend, so why not throw a little get together?” The timing of it all seemed to be perfect. Perhaps it is meant to be. “Why not have a couple of your friends come over and a couple of my friends come over as well? Namjoon-hyung has been dying for a hook-up maybe one of your friends would be —“

“I am not setting up my friends with one of your friends.” You scoffed at his suggestion and threw a handful of popcorn right at his direction which ensues a fit of chortles to escape his mouth.

“I was just fucking around, YN. But I’m serious about the house warming. It’ll be so cool!” Jungkook encourages the idea and he pauses his game to shoot his doe eyes straight at you. “What’s the worst that could happen?”

The “get together" was in full swing; the most popular music playing in the background of your apartment came from Jungkook’s bluetooth speakers while you began refilling the dip bowls for the tortilla chips you have laid out for your guests. Meanwhile, one of Jungkook’s good friends, Taehyung and Jimin offered to stop by the closest liquor store to purchase some more bottles of beers before their arrival at your new home.

As you filled up each bowl with different dips, your can feel the heat of your cheeks burning your skin and your eyes constantly moving from one object to another — unable to keep a steady vision. It wasn’t until you feel someone grab your arm to spin you around only to be greeted with your friends with another shot filled with cheap tequila.

“Alright, last shot, YN, then we’re moving onto margaritas.” Jisoo offered you the mini clear cup before she offers you a red cup filled with what seemed like to be Sprite.

“I’m a pro at this now. I don’t need a chaser.” Right behind Jisoo was Rose welcoming a new guest and you take the shot before you swallowing the warm liquor coating your throat.

With pinched eyes, you feel a rush of energy shoot through your body before you are greeted with a new face. “YN, this is Lisa! Lisa, this is YN.” The name sounded so familiar to you yet you couldn’t quite point out where you had once heard it from.

“Oh my god, it’s so nice to finally meet you.” The exaggerated niceties in your words can be heard from a mile away and Jungkook, from across the room, kept a close eye on you. He noticed you clutched onto the shot glass so tightly on your palm while he nursed his beer bottle.

As he had spotted your dazed eyes, his mind has suddenly focused on your demeanor; no longer offering his attention to the conversation his older friends are having with each other. It had been your fifth shot that evening. You were very good at pacing yourself… after some stern discipline from Jungkook himself. You knew that every fifteen minutes you would feel the effects of the shot you just drank.

A lazy smile etches onto your face as you drunkenly offer an unfamiliar face a hug. Jungkook knows your circle of friends. You had a close knit of them and he absolutely appreciated the fact that you would introduce you to them. Obviously, you had mutual friends considering you two met in an elective course.

He remembered that silly music course you two picked out for a stupid requirement. He remembered the first time he saw you. It took him by surprise but you took the seat right next to him and you had already pulled out your notebook, ready to taken notes on the first day. From then on that desk is where you sat and he would inevitably find a way to sit right next to you.

“Wait, you haven’t had a drink yet, have you?” The words came out so muffled to Jungkook when he realizes that Taehyung and Jimin had burst right through the door with their recently purchased beers. The boisterous entrance of his two closest friends distracted him for a moments time before you turned your back towards him and he catches glimpse of Rose and Jisoo pouring more shots into glasses.

“You’re giving me no attention at all, Jungkookie.” Hoseok, an older friend of Jungkook, nudges at him to earn it back. But his eyes remain fixated on your grinning face and he watches the rim of the shot glass touch the edge of your mouth. Your eyes squint at the taste of the new liquor and the burn that shoots a new moment of energy in your system.

“That’s because he’s watching over his girl right now.” The sounds of beers being popped open attracts his ears and the unexpected voice of his hyungs.

All of Jungkook’s posse shoots a quick glance over at the group of girls huddled in the kitchen counter doing multiple shots. His anxiety is creeping up to him because he knows how clumsy you can get when you were not sober. “Relax, Guk.” Namjoon attempts to comfort him. “You’re here and her friends are here. Plus, she’s home, anyway. Isn’t this the best time for her to get shit faced?”

Jungkook knew that Namjoon was right. If you did want to test the limits with your alcohol consumption, this would be the perfect time to do so. You weren’t in another person’s house or in a bar; you were in the comfort of your own home. If you did get hurt, you were surrounded by your friends and Jungkook would be nearby to assist you.

The thought brought some relief to Jungkook. Jimin offers Jungkook a cold bottle of beer where he takes a long swig out of it, only to feel the same anxiety when he witnesses you taking another shot for the third time in a row.

Hiccuped slurs can be heard as you sat on the kitchen counter along with a bunch of your friends who have been mixing cocktails for the rest of the group. Meanwhile, an aftermath of your drunken stupor involved shoveling chips and guacamole into your mouth while you would take slow sips of Rose’s sickeningly sweet margarita mix. The tequila was sneaky; though the beverage was primarily juice and she’d add soda for the sweetness, but the liquor would sneak back to you.

“Hey Rose, who’s that Jungkook guy you were talking about?” Lisa nudged as her eyes wandered around the kitchen and then the living room where a group of guys had been too busy conversing and guzzling beers of their own.

“Jungkookie’s my roommate.” A crooked and lazy grin appears right across your flushed face as your eyes met over with Jungkook who stood at the corner where his phone had been charging. The music changed in the background and you figured it was Jungkook who had decided to switch up the ambience.

Just an hour ago, everyone had been laughing their assess off with shared stories. Perhaps it was the liquor speaking. Nevertheless, everyone had been having a good time. But the excess consumption of mixed alcohol had the atmosphere winding down. The haze of exhaustion is beginning to settle amongst everyone in the room and you are leaning on your cupboards for support as you listened on quietly to your friends’ conversation.

Lisa sized him up from head to toe and you conceal your reaction from the rest of the world as you continue drinking your margarita mix to drown out what you’re able to hear. “He’s cute.”

“Oh, c’mon, Lisa — he’s more than just cute. He’s fucking hot.”

More chips, more guac.

“Plus, from what YN tells us, he’s peak boyfriend material.” Jisoo swoons silently in order to hide the conversation from the group of guys at the other side of the room.

More margarita.

“Is he now?” Lisa’s perfectly sculpted brows shoot up in interest and you are chewing on your cheek as you are soon running out of margarita to swallow down. A red plastic cup appears in front of Jisoo’s face and she narrows her eyes at you at your simple request.

“Don’t you think you’ve had enough to drink?” With a simple shake of your head, you nudge the cup further to her and she shrugs off any doubt because surely you could handle the alcohol. You just needed something to drown out the conversation that was being held at that moment, so what harm would another glass of margarita do?

“Do another shot with me.” Lisa encourages to Rose who shakes her head in response. “Liquid courage to ask Jungkook out. I thought you’d given him my number, YN.”

“Must’ve slipped my mind.” You mumble incoherently before Jisoo is wary of your behavior. You take a large gulp from the plastic red cup and squint at the sweetness of it all. You can’t help but shoot your eyes over to Jungkook where an eruption of boisterous laughter can be heard from across the room.

“Well, no one’s really stopping you.” With Rose’s encouragement, you are endlessly swallowing your refreshed drink only to discover you had continuously drank the entire thing in one go at the sight of the bottom of the cup.

“More, please.” You sighed.

The little get together came to an abrupt end when Hoseok began dozing off in the middle of one of Namjoon’s stories. Everyone collectively agreed to clean as much as they can, but with everyone being heavily intoxicated, it took nearly an hour to properly organize everything. You and Jungkook had agreed to let Hoseok and Yoongi to crash on your sectional couch since Yoongi came with Hoseok that evening.

Taehyung, a lightweight, was one of the few people who was the only one tipsy that evening and had managed to sober up within an hour and a half and had driven the rest of the gang home. As always, you were already calling an Uber for your friends who seemed to be slowly dozing off as they moved lethargically around the kitchen.

Jungkook’s gentlemanly behavior had been exhibited when he had gathered three bottles of water; one for each of your friend as they awaited for the arrival of the Uber driver you had ordered for them.

“Thank you, Kookie.” Three of your friends had collectively expressed their gratitude for your roommate in a sickeningly sweet manner.

Sickeningly sweet.

“YN can’t even walk, so I’ll accompany you three downstairs, if you’re okay with that.” He offers and Lisa is already nodding her head instantaneously.

“Aw, Jungkookie, such a sweetheart.”

Disgustingly sweet.

And, suddenly, there is a revolting heat seizing in your throat and your were thankful you possessed one brain cell that evening that ordered your body to move. You sprinted nearly tripping on your way to the bathroom where you fell on the tiled floors and propped the toilet up to regurgitate all of your stomach’s content into the porcelain bowl.

Tears began pooling your eyes and the awful taste of the margarita mix and tequila was all you had been focusing on. In the midst of coughing, someone’s digits came crawling to your neck as it gathered your thick mane away from your face. A soothing hand can be felt on your back where slow circles can be felt to ease the pain on your abdomen.

“What did I tell you about pacing yourself?” Jungkook’s rough voice can be heard to your left side and you continue spitting the grotesqueness that had been inside your stomach.

You grunted in response to his stern scolds and he is still caressing your back as a second wave of vomit come spilling out of your mouth. “I — I’m fine.” You croak out as he wipes the tears off of your cheek. “You should go and see if the girls need help —“

“I woke Yoongi-hyung up so he can accompany them.” His answer is quick and brief as he continues to brush away stray hairs off of your face. “You done?”

When the nausea subsides, you nod your head and he instantly stands from where he had been kneeling. He flushes the toilet and searches the sink for your toothbrush.

“Take this first.” He sees a small clear glass with filled tap water and a cap full of mouth wash. Closing the lid of the toilet bowl and sitting on it, you are sloshing the minty liquid in your mouth before you spitting the rest out.

He offers you your toothbrush with a pea sized toothpaste already placed at the center of it. “Brush your teeth.” He demands and you nod silently.

Unsure of what he had been up to, you can’t help but mentally slap yourself in the face for drinking so heavily. The past minute had gone by so quickly yet it had felt like a million years. When you completed brushing your teeth, Jungkook comes back with your pajamas. “Here; you can change into this and I’m taking you bed.”

“But I want to help clean up —“

“We can clean up tomorrow. You’re too fucked up to stand up right now.” He sighs seeing that you were trying your best to hold yourself up. The sound of someone reentering your front door notifies you and Jungkook that it was most likely who had returned to his peaceful slumber.

“Change now, please.”

Once Jungkook exits the bathroom and gives you the privacy you need to change into cleaner and comfortable clothes, you shut the door in front of you to strip off the rough layers of your sweater and jeans into your linen pajamas. You’ve decided to wash your face as well to give you some sort of cleanliness to your skin.

“Yeah, thank god they’re cooperative when they’re drunk — giggly but cooperative.” Muffled grumbles came from outside but Yoongi’s voice had been drowned out by the sound of water sloshing down the drain. “Oh, yeah, I think one of YN’s friends thought I was you, so she gave me this.” You turn the knobs of the water off and listen more closely to Jungkook’s conversation with Yoongi.

Little did you know that it had been Lisa’s phone number with a brief message to give her a call some time in the near future. But Jungkook takes the small note only to crumple it up and throw it to the side. When you’ve successfully cleansed your face, you’ve pat your face dry, trying to conceal your thoughts, and hoping you won’t say anything that would reveal your inner most feelings for Jungkook.

You have feelings for Jungkook.

“You can take my bed, hyung.” Jungkook offers. “I’m afraid YN’s going to feel sick again, so I’ll just sleep in her room tonight.” Yoongi grins mischievously at Jungkook and he nudges at him jokingly, earning an eye roll from Jungkook himself. “Don’t smile at me like that or I’m letting you sleep next to Hobi-hyung.” Yoongi pats Jungkook on his arm before he waltzes over to his bedroom where closes the door shut.

Footsteps approach the bedroom and you hear two knocks on the door where you open to reveal yourself in your pajamas, face completely bare and clean for Jungkook. Your exhausted eyes meet his and your pouty lips form a downward curve, obviously asking for forgiveness from Jungkook. “Sorry for drinking too much.” You grumble and he scoffs at your apology, but he can’t help but think of how cute you looked — tired and worn yet you had managed to win his heart over.

“Come on, let’s get you to bed.” Jungkook merely suggests. His voice had been a little bit more delicate, so you step out of the bathroom as he takes your arm to guide your lethargic body over to where your bedroom resided on the other side of the apartment. You had tidied your room before you had your little get together with your friends and you are already thanking your sober self for doing so. At the sight of your bed, you immediately crawl underneath your duvet covers and savored the softness and the fresh scent of the linens.

“You know, Guk, I’m not that bad. I probably just ate too much, that’s why I threw up.”

“You know, I hate how stubborn you are, but I hate myself more for even letting you do this to me.” Jungkook sits at the foot of your bed and you’ve successfully tucked yourself in, cocking your head to the side as the words have finally sunk in.

“What’re you talking about?” The curiosity is evident in your eyes and he was melting at the way your bottom lip protruded over your upper lip; the obvious pout on your face exhibited his biggest weakness.

Oh, how he’d want to lean down and place the most delicate of kisses upon your lips.

The thought is tempting and, given the state of you, if he had done it, you wouldn’t even remember a single thing the occurred in your room that evening. But Jungkook was not that guy — not at all. He wasn’t the type of guy to take advantage of your vulnerable consciousness. He wasn’t the type of guy who went out seeking for temporary… encounters.

He is a hopeless romantic and he is hopelessly in love with you.

“It’s whatever. You’re too drunk to understand.” Jungkook scoffs and you stare at him for the longest time. Your hazed voice chanting just how much you realized just how beautiful he looked despite the shittiest lighting in your bedroom. The dazed look painted right across your visage disappears into a crooked smile before you giggle.

“I am drunk, huh?” The intonation of your voice tickled his ears and you scoot your body to the other side of the bed before lifting the sheets to over the spot you had originally occupied. “C’mon, I know you’re not leaving me alone any time soon, so you might as well get comfortable.”

The suggestion was tempting but you see the hesitance across his face before your lips did that… stupid pouting thing again and Jungkook rolls his eyes in defeat before he slips underneath the covers as an act of surrender. When you giddily turn your attention over to Jungkook who laid right beside you, he faces right towards your body and you face him as well.

“To be fair, I was impressed; four shots in half an hour and you did not throw up.” You smile proudly and a bit too lazily. Your eyes remain half lidded as the comforts of your bed envelope your aching body.

“You have got to give me some credit, Kookie. I’m not so much of a lightweight anymore.” You nuzzled your head into the pillow but as your eyes come to a close and you are met with darkness, your brain immediately drifts to an imagination of Jungkook’s soft chest underneath your cheek instead of the fluffy pillows. Perhaps you’d hear his loud heart beating against his chest and feel his steady breathing.

But this was close enough; the scent of his cologne and beer lingered a mere inches away from you and the softness of the pillow was enough to let your imagination run wild.

And Jungkook notices this.

He notices the way your eyes come fluttering close and the grin remained etched across your face. He didn’t want to disturb a you drifted off in your sleep, but he can hear the soft giggle coming out of your mouth. He can see your body relaxing and succumbing to the exhaustion before he begins moving a stray hair away from your face.

The pads of his thumb brushes against your nose and cheeks as his nails lightly tap your ear lobes to tuck the hairs off of your sleepy face. “You wanna know something funny?” Jungkook begins.

“Hm?” It’s all you can really respond to at this point. Your poor body is succumbing to the exhaustion of this evening’s events. Half of Jungkook urged for you to go straight to slumber — that way he’d get a good night’s sleep too. But another half of him desperately wanted to savor this moment; you laid so comfortably right next to him and there’s nothing in the world to worry about.

He wasn’t spending time with you as much lately. Your schedules never really clicked; he woke up too early to go to the gym on the weekdays and, by the time he was done working out, you were already on your way to your morning classes. But there was already breakfast ready for him to eat because you always saved some for him to eat before work. Even though Jungkook went to work later, he would still manage to get home first. He understood why you were staying out late though; being a full-time student and working on the side was not an easy task to do at hand.

So he would be relieved to see you come home because, to return the favor, he had dinner ready for you. Most of the time, you would scarf down your meals and go straight to doing your homework before you freshened up for bed. However, as exam season approached, you wouldn’t eat half of the time; it was a relentless cycle of sleep and study.

To have you him right in front of him with the most serene grins plastered on your face, though hammered, he savored every second of it. And, suddenly, his warm fingers are still caressing your cheek and you are relishing in the warmth of his palm against your skin. The soft hums of pleasure vibrating on your throat brought a leap to his heart and he can feel you nestling your face into his palm.

“Yoongi-hyung tells me that one of your friends gave him their number. The funny thing is they thought he was me.” Perhaps this wasn’t the perfect time to introduce a new subject, but he was quite curious as to how you would react. But there is a silence that filled the air and your steady breathing is all he can manage to decipher. When he hears the light snores coming from your small mouth, he chuckles endearingly.

When he things that you have gone to your tranquil dream land, he peels the duvet off of his body and the weight shifting causes you to stir but he manages to put it to a halt and you are breathing steadily again. When Jungkook reverses towards your door to take complete his slumber in the living room, he hears you call his name.

“Wait, where’d you go, Kookie?” You say so tiredly as you began searching the empty bed side and your eyes come fluttering open. “Can’t you stay? I liked it when you were playing with my hair.”

Jungkook couldn’t believe what he had been hearing. He keeps reminding himself that you were intoxicated and you won’t remember your own words the following morning. But, on the other hand, he is reminded of a saying Jimin always told him.

When a person is drunk, the most sober thoughts come spilling out of their mouths.

So was this your most sober thoughts? Did you actually enjoy his physical touch on you? Did it bring comfort to you? Because he would continue doing all night if he could, just to please you.

“I’ll stay, don’t worry.” He hums and he wonders whether this is the correct thing to do.

Was he taking advantage of your vulnerability like this? Though his intentions were pure, he is reminding himself that you were clearly inebriated and the sooner you slept, the sooner he would be out of the room. He was drunk and his imagination is running wild as he lays right next to you once again. His tattooed hand reaches towards your face where he continues to caress your hair, twirling the soft ends around his large digits. His nails would comb right through them and, occasionally, massage your scalp.

It was a tantalizing experience. You were too lost in the feeling of his fingers tangling through your mane and the pads of his fingers digging upon your scalp which soothe tension around your head. You were melting at his touch and you can feel your consciousness surrender to the exhaustion overwhelming your physique at the very moment.

“Kookie?” A soft whisper leaves your lips.

Unaware of your actions, you are moving your body closer to the warmth of Jungkook’s body right across from you. One thing you are aware of is that your arm instinctively reached over to his waist where they slither on him; a sense of reassurance that he wouldn’t leave you whatsoever. He freezes for a moment and relaxes when he sees your nose scrunch in response. As he resumes to play with your hair, you are back to the hypnotic feeling of his fingers on your hair. Your arm relaxes onto his waist and, in response, Jungkook is growing accustomed to the weight of your arm on his body.

“Hm?” He hums in response.

And, suddenly, when the snores increase in volume, his fingers completely stop playing with you hair. Instead, they fall lower to your own waist where his arm lays where you are already fall asleep. At the feeling of someone’s touch on your waist, you instinctively pull yourself closer to the warmth of his body; your head pressing onto his chest and the scent of your lavender shampoo is so addictive when he nuzzles his nose upon your head.

“Don’t text her."

Your steady chest rises and lowers against his body and he can feel his heart beat… steady from its increased acceleration earlier. The sounds of your soft exhales on his chest was enough to knock him right off his feet because he cradles you close to him as Jungkook, too, drifts off in his own subconscious.

“I won’t.”

The violent rays of the sun shone right across your face which forces you to flutter your eyes open. The duvet completely tangled around your legs and you had managed to kick them off as you slowly and cautiously lift your exhausted body off of the comforts of your bed. The dryness of your throat is alarming and you are searching for a water bottle by your nightstand, but the door swinging open has managed to catch your attention and you are met with a freshly showered Jungkook.

“Huh, I wasn’t expecting you to be up yet.” You had caught sight of his waist as he is tugging his shirt on him. His nearly dry hair is ruffled as he is reaches towards the bottle of the pain killers before he tosses you a water bottle. “Take two of them right now.”

The grumble that emitted from your mouth ensued an upwards stretch on his mouth as he examines you trying to process the events of last night, that is, if you can even remember a single thing. When you pop the cap open and attempt to spill out two pills into your mouth, your throat is desperate for the coolness of the water to satisfy your thirst.

Jungkook takes the empty space right next to you as you scratch the back of your head. He is much bigger than you thought as he towered over you, trying to remember anything from last night. “How’d you sleep last night?” The gloat was so evident in his voice and this was not something you wanted to hear first thing in the morning, so you found yourself laying back down only to shove the pillow to your face.

“I don’t want to hear it, Kookie! If I did something stupid, just say it! Say you told me so.” Your muffled whining can only be heard to Jungkook and he is already chuckling at your reaction. Most of the time when you are unable to handle your alcohol and he ends up having to take care of you, he happens to find a way to embarrass you the first thing in the morning.

“It wasn’t really that bad.” He begins and he waits for you to peek out of the pillow you had shoved out of your face. When he meets your eyes, there is a smug grin right across his handsome face. “You did throw up though.” You are shoving the pillow back into your face before he catches it before you can cover your shame. When you are exposed to him, you are pulling the pillow on his hands while one of his hands attempt to peel the cushion right off your face and the other pushing your arm away from it.

“I get it, Guk!” A fit of giggles begin erupting from your mouths at the idea of you just throwing up.

“I gotta give you props though, YN. You managed to run to the bathroom; 10 points for quick reflexes.” Your grip on the pillow softens and Jungkook’s strength overpowers yours so he completely rids of the pillow of your face and you are now fully facing him as he is practically towering over you.

“Well, I learned from the best, didn’t I?” The playful wink was enough for both his arms to cease their function. Both of his hands are on either side of your bed and you find it quite hard to believe how the both of you have found yourself in a very compromising situation. But you didn’t mind it at all and, quite frankly, Jungkook didn’t either.

Suddenly, the atmosphere changes as faint memories of last night’s conversation come replaying in Jungkook’s head. He wished the memory would come jogging back to you, but he knew better not to say much.

“Was there anything else that happened last night?” There was one thing you did remember; it was the primary reason for your choice to be completely shit-faced that evening. You couldn’t… live with the idea of Jungkook being remotely interested in one of your friends — it’s not that they were unlikeable. You love them and believe they’re great girls, but… their intentions were purely… physical and just the thought of it brought up an emotion you were unaware you would feel.

He simply shakes his head and Jungkook remains frozen as he stares into your eyes. “Well, Lisa did give me her number.” He announces and he witnesses the split second of sincerity in your reaction; the micro reaction of your eyes looking directly into his with such pain and the pout that threatened to etch downwards, but you had manage to force yourself to remain unfazed. “I threw it out though.”

And there it was.

There is a weakness in your grin but he witnesses your cheeks turn a light pink color and he is gnawing on the inside of his cheeks, desperate to steal a kiss. But he wasn’t that type of guy. “YN,” He starts and you are aware of the atmosphere changing. His tone changes and you are aware that he is serious and you can see that he is hesitant; you can see him contemplate his choice and you’re aware of the consequences. If he chooses to pursue anything, you two have crossed a line between friends where you both cannot reverse your actions. On the other hand, you two can continue this game of what ifs. “YN, I really want to kiss you.”

You swallowed hard at the word.

Kiss.

“Kiss?” You repeated.

“Yes, kiss; my lips on your lips.” The heat on your cheeks is rapidly increasing in temperature and it soon radiates to your lobes. “Is that okay with you?” When your eyes lower to his moist lips, you cock your head to the side before you offer a single nod. When you grant him permission, his hand moves a stray hair out of your face and his thumb caresses your cheek to feel the softness of your skin. You revel the sensation of his soft yet calloused skin on yours; you flutter your eyes closed as you smell the scent of minty toothpaste as he moves closer. The tip of his nose delicately hits yours and you are aware, now, that you were holding your breath. Your heart races so hard on your chest and you are afraid it could nearly break through it.

“Breathe, YN.” He laughs as he notices such gesture.

“Sorry, I’m… nervo —“ When you reply, he interrupts you midway to capture your bottom lip in between his mouth. You are returning the favor only to savor the taste of his mouth; so fresh — like air. His hand still cradles your face so closely to his and your mouths move in synchrony with each other.

Suddenly, you weren’t breathing again.

Not out of nervousness.

But because you two just couldn’t get enough of each other.

↪ Please stay tuned for the next part!

#jungkook fic #jungkook imagine #jungkook smut #jungkook fluff #jungkook x reader

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kassies-take · 5 years ago

Text

Thorul Over Luthor (Part 5)

A/n: okay yeah sorry y’all. The season of giving is over I was suppose to update this during the holidays but I never got around to it. Well actually I had a spontaneous idea that changed the course of the story.

Warning: Love, Sister Teasing

Lena Luthor x StepSister!Reader, Supercorp

Word Count: 1538

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5

You lounged on the couch as Lena ran around her loft looking for her notes.

“(Y/n/n), Alex is going to pick you up for D.E.O training. I’ll stop by at lunch. Did you want me to bring food to you guys, or go out for lunch? Just let me know later.” Lena walked around the counter to your spot on the couch and moved your feet off the glass coffee table. “Where are my notes!” Lena went back to trashing the apartment.

You sat up before you noticed you had your feet on the notes this whole time. You knocked on the glass to get her attention, when you had her attention you shifted to hide behind her notes.

“My notes!” She gasped before leaping across the living room to grab her notes. “Where were they?”

‘Under my feet.”

“Under your fee- now my notes smell like feet,” she teased.

‘My feet don’t smell!’ You gasped in in silence.

“I think the whole National City say otherwise,” she continued.

‘If that’s the case, then we better sacrifice someone to save the whole city!’ you grabbed the papers out of her hands, before chasing after her to make her smell her smelly notes.

That continued till the bell rang at the entrance, Lena stopped in your path which caused you to bump into her with her notes in her face. Your triumphant smile brought a smile to Lena’s lips as she moved to open the door.

“Hi Alex, (Y/n/n) is ready. Beware of her smelly feet.” She whispered the last part.

You crossed your arms in disapproval with a glare before you smiled, hugged Lena and kiss her on the cheek. Alex wrapped an arm around you, having what seemed to be a conversation she was having to herself to the outside world.

As any DEO agent, you were to begin training with hand-to-hand combat. There wasn’t that many crimes that went through National City, that led to more time training with Alex and Winn. It was nearly lunch when Kara decided to drop in.

‘Hey Kara,” you waved.

“Hey little one, beating Alex’s butt yet?” Kara hugged you.

“Very funny Kara,” Alex rolled her eyes.

“Hey! Now, that Kara is here maybe we can run the experiment to see if she can control people’s powers when she intercepts.” Winn beamed holding a tablet in his hand.

You jumped for joy at Winn’s suggestion, you clasped your hands together and pouted at Kara.

“I’m fine with it.”

You jumped into Kara’s body leaving your body still. Your excitement took over and you began fangirl.

“Oh my god! I’m Supergirl!” Using Kara’s arm you felt around her arms. You began to feel weightless, the feeling of your feet slowly leaving the ground took you off Kara’s arms. You flew into the air flying in a figure eight path, laughing.

Alex and Winn looked in concern as you began flying higher and higher towards the ceiling. You didn’t have time to try Kara’s other powers when the training room door open at the same time you hit the ceiling. Kara felt heavier now, like something other than Earth’s gravity was pulling her toward Earth. No surprise that in the midst of trying to land, you tackled Lena still in Kara’s body. Then you felt a feeling you did not want to feel towards your sister so you left her body.

Kara and Lena both blushed red. Neither of them wanted to leave the other’s embrace, but it also didn’t help that Lena couldn’t move till Kara did. Winn secretly gave you a high five as the two practically had heart eyes.

‘What’s for lunch?’ You spoke through everyone’s minds.

“Oh, um, uh.” You , Alex, and Winn raised your eyebrows at the stuttering mess of your sister. “If it’s alright if I take (Y/n) out for lunch? Bring her back after?”

A unanimous yes echoed the room before it fell into silence once again.

“Uh Kara,” Lena’s eyes quickly darted towards Kara’s strong arms.

“Oh. Yeah! My bad,” Kara pushed herself off the ground and Lena found herself missing her touch.

You and Lena left the training room, once the door shut behind you Alex began to tease her sister, like you did with Lena.

“Way to make it more obvious, Kar.”

“I didn’t do anything. That was all (Y/n)!”

“You know (Y/n) can feel your emotions when she intercepts you.” Winn left that comment in the training room as he made his way back to his desk.

Kara’s eye widen. “ALEX, THAT MEANS (Y/N) KNOWS. WHAT IF SHE TELLS LENA?” Kara panicked.

“Kar, (Y/n) didn’t have to intercept you to know you like Lena.”

“Is it that obvious?”

“You might as well write ‘I like you, Lena’ in the sky.” Alex left the training room.

Lena was still flustered, that was mainly due to the fact that you were teasing her.

‘You are so in loveeeee’

“I am not. And Kara doesn’t feel the same way.”

‘Who d’ ya think you’re kidding? She’s the Earth and heaven to you. Try to keep it hidden. Honey, we can see right through you. Girl, ya can’t conceal it. We know how you feel and who you’re thinking of.’ You sang still connected to Lena’s mind.

Lena stopped in the middle of the sidewalk to turn back towards you. “No chance, no way! I won’t say it. no no!”

You smirked as Lena unconsciously finished the song. ‘You swoon, you sigh why deny it, uh-oh.’

Lena ignored you and continued walking towards Noonans. You continued skipping around Lena singing.

‘At least out loud I won’t say I’m in love’ Lena thought before you jumped higher and wrapped her in a hug and a goofy grin.

‘Oh my god! You’re in love!!!!!!!! When you and Kara get married I called maid of honor! And when you have kids, you don’t have to pay for a babysitter! Although if you ever think of having sex, please don’t do it at our place.’

“Get out of my head, now. N! O! W! Right NOW!” Lena’s blush deepened as you only kept skipping and shining your smile.

‘Thorul 1, Luthor 0′ You said before the walk was quiet.

You had lasted the rest of the walk, waiting in line, ordering food, waiting for you food and till you took the first bite of your chicken burrito wrap - filled with avocado, tomato, black bean & corn salsa, cheddar cheese & zesty pepitas dressing , wrapped in a spinach tortilla.

‘Lena, what is love?’

“Are you seriously asking that right now?”

‘I mean Alex has Maggie, James has Lucy, J’onn has M’gann, Winn has Lyra, heck you will probably have Kara.’

“Huh,” Lena paused before she placed her wrap down on her plate. “Think of it as a snow globe.”

‘Snow globe?’

“Yeah, to most people it’s just a round glass object that gives the allusion of fake snow. But if you really think about it, when a snow globe is customized it captures the perfect moment. It’s a perfect life, the glass makes you feel protected, safe from any danger.”

‘Is that what you feel for Kara?’

“Not only Kara, love.” She held reached across the table to hold your hand. “I feel it with the best sister in the world.”

You smiled back, already planning to get a snow globe for Lena. And that was exactly what you did the moment Lena dropped you off at the DEO. Unfortunately, the DEO became busier at the moment as there was an alien attack downtown. You were excited to put your skills to the test but then disappointed when Lena didn’t let you.

An angry Luthor was something to not mess with.

‘Thorul 1 Luthor 1.” You mentally counted.

You spent your DEO time customizing that snow globe you were going to get once it was finished .

It was about a week when the snow globe came in. You were working on some tech with Winn when Alex stormed her way towards the two of you with a box in hand.

“What is that?” Maggie asked.

“I don’t know, delivered to (Y/n) Thorul. Next time you need something delivered, could you put your address and not the DEO’s we are still a secret organization.”

‘But I couldn’t put my address or Lena would know.’

“Some type of sex toy?” Maggie bluntly asked with a smirk.

‘No, it’s a snow globe.’

“Snow globe?” Winn, Maggie and Alex questioned.

‘Yup, for Lena. She said it makes her feel protected and safe. Can you give me a ride Maggie?’

“Sure, kiddo.”

‘In the front this time?’

“No promises.”

Lena had made it home before you. The apartment was a mess, but it was a good kind of mess. A mess that showed that it wasn’t just her living in the place, before you arrived it was all white, now it had color, and framed pictures. Lena decided to rest her eyes for a bit before she heard the door clicked open.

“(Y/n). I’m glad you’re home, we’re having take out. I don’t feel like cooking.” She stood up and faced the entrance.

BANG!

#lena luthor x reader #lena luthor #lena luthor x sister!reader #lena luthor imagines #lena luthor imagine #supergirl x reader #supergirl imagines #supergirl imagine #supergirl #supercorp #morgana pendragon

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enneagramwingmiranda · 5 years ago

Text

Parks and Recreation: The actual enneagram types of Leslie, Ron, Tom, April, Andy, Donna, Ben, Chris, and Jerry

The Protagonist: Leslie Knope [Type 3]

“I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.”

Enneagram Wing: 3w2 (Achiever along with a helper)

"I care. I care a lot. It's kinda my thing."

Core Fear: Being exposed as or thought incompetent, inefficient, or worthless; failing to be or appear successful

Core Desire: Having high status and respect, being admired, successful, and valuable

Leslie feels her purpose is to make the world a better place, specifically Pawnee, since this is the place she holds dear to her heart and is the most reachable for her. Her identity is defined by her work and her drive and passion are what allow her to continue to move up the latter. She takes rejection and set backs hard, however, she always gets back up and continues to move forward to reach her goals. Her influence shapes the hearts and minds of her coworkers. She inspires them to be better people and to find what they are meant to do in life and do it. Along with her go-getter attitude, she goes above and beyond for her friends (2) and they greatly appreciate her care and efforts. As for her childhood wound, she has described her mother as cold and withholding so we can only assume that she received praise and attention only from the achievements she made. Her mother also works in government and only respects those with an assertive and dominant presence.

The Sensible Friend: Ann Perkins [Type 6]

“As Leslie’s maid of honor, I really need her bachelorette party to go well, which is why I’m stress eating gummy penises.”

Enneagram wing: 6w7 (Loyalist along with an enthusiast)

“I’m putting myself out there, meeting some new people, having some causal fun, and it’s awkward.”

Core Fear: Fearing fear itself, being without support, security, or guidance; being blamed, targeted, alone, or physically abandoned

Core Desire: Having security, guidance, and support

Ann is by far the most sensible character. She is the person everyone knows they can rely on. Andy unfortunately took advantage of this quality resulting in her becoming his caretaker rather than remaining an equal. Leslie appreciates her sensibility and this is what makes them such great friends. However, Leslie can trigger Ann’s already existing anxiety from her high expectations and good intentioned pushy behavior. Another side of the coin of is her fear of ending up alone. She is constantly dating and even settles a few times to avoid loneliness. It is when she takes the time to be single and soothes this fear that she and Chris end up together. Ann also has an adventurous streak. She likes to go out and have a good time. She just sometimes needs a little push from Chris, Leslie, or Donna.

The True Introvert: Ron Swanson [Type 5]

“That is a canvas sheet, the most versatile object known to man. It can be used to make tents, backpacks, shoes, stretchers, sails, tarpaulins, and I suppose, in the most dire of circumstances, it can be a surface on which to make art.”

Enneagram wing: 5w4|5w6 (Balanced)

“Don’t start chasing applause and acclaim. That way lies madness.”

Core Fear: Being annihilated, invaded, or not existing; being thought incapable or ignorant; having obligations placed upon you or your energy being completely depleted

Core Desire: Being capable and competent

Ron is an intellect, constantly going off on philosophical tangents about the corrupt ways of government, effective life hacks, and flawed human nature. He believes there is only one way to do things and his ways of going about things are very unique to himself (4). He is a non-conformist. He loves learning new things and adding to his craft. He is a breakfast and wood enthusiast. Ron is quite guarded and withdrawn from the world and prefers this. His childhood wound is that his mother was intrusive and over-controlling so we can assume he felt exposed and defenseless. This followed Ron in adulthood as he had many toxic relationships with women similar to her. Thus, Ron feels he is best served to live in isolation and fend for himself, as well as, rely on cerebral means rather than emotional means. Ron demonstrates his wing 6 with his desire to be safe and have security.

The Entrepreneur: Tom Haverford [Type 3]

“At the risk bragging, one of the things I’m best at is riding coattails. Behind every successful man is me, smiling and taking partial credit.

Enneagram wing: 3w4 (Achiever along with an individualist)

“‘Zerts’ are what I call desserts. ‘Trée-trées’ are entrées. I call sandwiches ‘sammies,’ ‘sandoozles,’ or ‘Adam Sandlers.’ Air conditioners are ‘cool blasterz’ with a ‘z’ — I don’t know where that came from. I call cakes ‘big ol’ cookies.’ I call noodles ‘long-ass rice.’ Fried chicken is ‘fry-fry chicky-chick.’ Chicken parm is ‘chicky-chicky-parm-parm.’ Chicken cacciatore? ‘Chicky-cacc.’ I call eggs ‘pre-birds,’ or ‘future birds.’ Root beer is ‘super water.’ Tortillas are ‘bean blankets.’ And I call forks ‘food rakes.’”

Core Fear: Being exposed as or thought incompetent, inefficient, or worthless; failing to be or appear successful

Core Desire: Having high status and respect, being admired, successful, and valuable

Tom measures his entire worth from his successes and failures. He is extremely creative and is constantly coming up with unique ideas to form a successful business.

The Misanthrope: April Ludgate [Type 4]

“I wasn’t listening but I strongly disagree.”

Enneagram wing: 4w5 (Individualist along with investigator)

“If you ever speak me to me in Spanish please use the formal “usted”.

Core Fear: Being inadequate, emotionally cut off, plain, mundane, defective, flawed, or insignificant

Core Desire: Being unique, special, and authentic

April portrays major apathy but it’s clearly done to hide her genuine care and insecurity. She wants to be unique and special, thus overdoing it with her quirky, odd, eccentric, nonconformist talk and lifestyle. Her speech and way of behaving is an oxymoron. She deep down wants what everyone else wants: real love, real friendship, and a successful career. As she grows up and matures, she moves further away from her exaggerated dark persona to a normal expressive, mature adult. However, she adds in whatever she needs to to maintain her individuality. April also values cerebral pursuits shown in her getting accepted to an exceptional veterinary school. Her wing 5 is what helps her identify with so much with Ron.

The Charming Goofball: Andy Dwyer [Type 9]

“It’s fine. It’s just that life is pointless and nothing matters and I’m always tired.”

Enneagram wing: 9w8 (Peacemaker along with the challenger)

“I’m not crying. I’m just allergic to jerks!”

Core Fear: Being in conflict, tension, or discord; feeling shut out and overlooked; losing connection and relationship with others

Core Desire: Having inner stability and peace of mind

The epitome of Andy’s character is his easy-going nature. He is also very caring and thoughtful. He rarely ever voices if anything is bothering him and we see him go through great lengths to end any conflict between he and April. He attempts to make things right with Ann after their break up but doesn’t succeed. Andy possess a child-like mindset and view of the world and this is what seems to serve as a coping skill for the trials and tribulations of life. This also makes him endearing and what makes him perfect for April as she holds a similar mentality.

The Nerd: Ben Wyatt [Type 1]

“I don’t even have time to tell you how wrong you are. Actually, it’s going to bug me if I don’t.”

Enneagram wing: 1w9 (Reformer along with peacemaker)

“Stick to the list and you’ll do great. I have total faith in you... (there’s like a 30% chance they’ll both die.)”

Core Fear: Being wrong, bad, evil, inappropriate, unredeemable, or corruptible

Core Desire: Having integrity, being good, balanced, accurate, virtuous, and right

Ben is straightforward and willing to tell the truth, even if it could offend someone. He likes things to be in order. He often feels like the odd one out in the parks department because he values principles and professionalism while his colleagues behave inappropriately. He admires Leslie for her quirky professionalism. Ben also desires a peaceful environment and will keep quiet about things bothering him resulting in passive aggressive behavior.

The Optimist: Chris Traeger [Type 7]

“The world is my gymnasium, Ron.”

Enneagram wing: 7w6 (Enthusiast along with loyalist)

“I am 100% certain that I am 0% sure of what I’m going to do.”

Core Fear: Being deprived, trapped in emotional pain, limited, or bored; missing out on something fun

Core Desire: Being happy, fully satisfied, and content

Chris is extremely positive all the time to cover up his true inner turmoil. He had a tough childhood and coped with the trauma by avoiding the negative emotions and putting his focus on his health. Thus he became a health nut. In the field of clinical psychology, he would most likely be diagnosed with orthorexia. Chris has a lot of anxiety about life and desires to feel a sense of safety in his life and relationships, thus making him fall into the wing 6. He desires the guidance and support from others (he started seeing a counselor 5 times a week during his depressive episode).

The Minx: Donna Meagle [Type 8]

“You better watch yourself.”

Enneagram wing: 8w7 (Challenger along with enthusiast)

“Treat yourself.”

Core Fear: Being weak, powerless, harmed, controlled, vulnerable, manipulated, and left at the mercy of injustice

Core Desire: Protecting yourself and those in your inner circle

Donna is the epitome of “an independent black woman who don’t need no man.” She essentially dos onto others what she fears they will do onto her. Thus, she manipulates and abuses vulnerable men to get what she wants and then leaves them. We can assume that something happened in her childhood that resulted in this relationship pattern. She discusses her grandma dying while having a threesome so this behavior was certainly model for her. She falls on the 7 wing for her enjoyment of life's greatest pleasures.

The Target: Jerry Gergich [Type 9]

“So I go by Terry now. They already had a Larry in the Parks department, and they suggested that they change my name to Terry. I told them my real name was Garry, and they said ‘who cares?’ What a fun bunch of guys.”

Enneagram wing: 9w1 (Peacemaker along with reformer)

“Well, you know it's like I always say 'it ain't government work if you don't have to do it twice.”

Core Fear: Being in conflict, tension, or discord; feeling shut out and overlooked; losing connection and relationship with others

Core Desire: Having inner stability and peace of mind

Jerry is clearly a peacemaker in that he keeps his mouth shut despite his constant abuse from his colleagues at the parks department. He identifies with Andy in that Tom was trying to dub him as the new office target due to his similar easygoing nature and clumsiness. He shows that he is a wing 1 in his values of goodness and morality.

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freedomartspress · 4 years ago

Text

Brother 1, 2, and 3 — Lauren August Betts

The poetry chapbook, “Brother and Other Things”, that these three poems are apart of are available for free/donation directly to Lauren, here.

Brother 1

When I was thirteen I spent a month with my auntie

that was in the summer

now I’m wondering how my insides work

how my fingernails can be so short

why stores keep making shoes too small for my feet

even in Connecticut

even in California

my brother moved out here and then he moved back

he had bigger plans than to stay away from home

and hope that somewhere else would claim him

just because he had arrived there

he has dreams about art school

I have dreams about sunken eyes and broken fingers

and begging people who are too deep asleep to listen

I didn’t realize I was doing it

But I spent a lot of time pretending not to know anything

and I don’t wake up all the way every day

My brother keeps breaking his ankle in the same place

I keep shaving the line of hair between my belly button and my hipline

Because I can’t untell myself that it’s ugly

I wonder if my brother and l will ever live in the same city

I spend a lot of time hoping he’s proud of me

it’s not every day that you can’t stop noticing

the frame of dirt around a fingernail

The changes in temperature

it’s not every day that you can catch the you that causes problems

and sit them down

and ask them to stay there until you can clean up your bedroom

and make calls to the people collecting your money

to ask them to wait a little longer

and write down the date correctly

there’s something too pretty for words about taking your time.

Brother 2

While I’ve got you here –

My fingernails are changing colors.

Orange is what they’re becoming, It’s not coming off.

I’d guess a deficiency in some major vitamin

But I’ve been taking that tincture she gave me

I do not know if my fingernails are strong.

Never let ‘em get long enough.

While I’ve got you here –

My brother is coughing up corn

Corn is sweet

My brother is coughing up dirt

Comes here for a week and goes to slaughter a lamb for a party

The lamb is stealing the sow’s food from the next pen over

The lamb lost its neck wool from rubbing up against the gate

to eat the pig’s corn and melons

The things you notice.

I’m doing so much out of order

I’ve been feeding that lamb but not enough

And that lamb tells me a story

The story is this: “You are repulsed by suffering”

That is what I walk with

That is what I put safely in my pocket

And still somehow manage to lose, somewhere on the farm.

Somewhere on the farm I pick a peach and its

Never sweet so while I’ve got you here I just wanted to ask:

Where in the world are all the good peaches?

I have a fear of losing my books

Of losing my time in the morning

My brother’s coughing up beans and rice

My brother’s coughing up chalupas

They were always his favorite and I never liked them

He asks for them now when he’s twenty and I am twenty four

and I want to tell him

“No, I don’t want chalupas. I hate them and I’ve always hated them.”

But I don’t.

I avoid it

When I begin to make tortillas de harina

And he asks what I’m doing I tell him I thought he said “tacos”

And he doesn’t argue with me.

He is so helpful

He is always patting my head

Brother 3

I started seeing lady bugs in late February

On the 28th I sowed chili seeds and yarrow

to plant in someone else’s garden

invest in someone else’s future

the days are becoming long

or at least it's warmer than it was a month ago

I was thinking you might be able to figure out if you love someone

by looking at their picture quicker than any other way

it’s a myth that frogs sing only at night

And that the seeds of a pepper are the spicy part

I forget who told me

I’m putting myself where someone else can see me

someone good beyond good

warm beyond warm

kind beyond kind

hiding in the tall grass

killing time

I didn’t dance this morning or yesterday

but I did do my laundry

it always gets dark before I’m ready

and I miss my brother

I always miss him but today I miss him in the sun while the frogs sing

I know that he’s in the cold

one year older

somewhere new

and for some reason I don’t understand

I can’t call him and check in

That would make things worse

he’s always falling in love

and drawing pictures of my life

the cows on the hill

the sheep we slaughtered together, hanging

the barn

and it’s always more beautiful when he is showing it

I asked him to draw me a home

but I know it’s a lot to ask for so I told him no pressure

that whenever he gets around to it is good for me

he has better music than I do

he loves the piano

is red green color blind

it might be that he has a little piece of someone else in him

someone we thought we lost two years before he was born

the ocean knows how good it is

and he knows how good he is

I can tell

I feel like this day might kill me by being bright and going on forever

these birds might kill me with their singing

I’ll call him later

I’ll call him tomorrow

I’ll call him when I’m ready

and even a whole entire day isn’t plenty

but let’s practice saying it anyway

“It’s plenty”

“you’re plenty”

“I’ve got plenty, thank you”

bet you didn’t know you can make pasta out of potatoes just by smiling warm and

opening wide your mouth

bet you didn’t know that hot as hell can be good for your bones

sometimes even the people I love to the moon

don’t put things back where they belong

and break things that are special to me

I keep hearing the word graze

the sounds keep making me jump

I always add 1 to a number to make sense of it

and it really does help

but sometimes even when I spend a day doing exactly what I want

I fall down on the ground at the end of it

I just need a breath and for everything to be quiet for a minute

anyway, something lucky:

my friends are asleep on the couch in the den and outside on the porch

and I still feel them with me almost all the way.

Lauren August Betts is very cool, worked on a farm once, and definitely has a brother. You can find out more about her on Instagram @laurenaugustbetts and/or via the interview on the IGTV section of @freedomartspress on Instagram.

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the-sunshine-dims · 5 years ago

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Virgil had always liked Logan, and ever since that pain of a confession I mean who knew that Logan was as dense as a brick! anyway-

ever since Logan and Virgil started dating Virgil was less anxious when ever Logan was around, and became very anxious when Logan was excluded from stuff

or just wasn’t there and every time where they were doing a video and Logan didn’t show up Virgil would immediately deck out to find Logan

and sometimes the anxious side would find a Logan asleep at his desk, fallen asleep while working and when this happens Virgil try’s to carry the logical side bridal style to Logan’s bed and tuck him in with a lot of blankets so that Logan is comfortable

and goes back to the others telling them what happened, and if they want to make the video that day Virgil isn’t ganna be in it either because he doesn’t feel comfortable enough to do the video without the logical side,

most of the time they understand sometimes though Roman gets annoyed because he wants to do the video now but Patton convinces him that it would actually be better tomorrow or the next day because they have more time to double check stuff so nothing bad happens with the equipment.

One time when this happened Logan wasn’t 100% asleep and quietly woke up in Virgil’s arms

“Mmmm What's going on?” Logan asked unable to hide the grogginess from his voice

Virgil almost jumped at the sudden noise but the responsibility of holding the very tired Logan grounded him “o-oh! Your awake! I was ganna move you to your bed that way you can sleep comfortably...”

“Oh”

“Do you still want to sleep?”

“I don’t know,” Logan curled into Virgil's warmth

“If you want I can set up a movie and we can watch together?”

“That sounds good”

Virgil sat down the sleepy logical side on the couch in Logan’s room before shuffling through a couple of movies and finally holding up a disk “is the princess bride ok?”

Logan made a small noise of affirmation before Virgil plopped it In the DVD player and went to the kitchen for popcorn and hot cocoa

“What are you doing kiddo?” A voice coming from the living room said, Patton

“Oh umm... well Logan wasn’t fully asleep when I picked him up and I woke him up so now we’re watching the princess bride”

“Okay kiddo! Need any help with the snacks?”

“Nah, thanks pat, but I’m okay it’s only hot coco and popcorn”

After the stuff was done Virgil quickly went back into Logan’s room

“Hey L, I’m back!” Virgil said

“Mmm”

Virgil sat down next to Logan and sat the snacks and beverages down on the table before turning on the movie

Logan curled up on Virgil’s lap as Virgil softly played with Logan’s hair

the movie ended

“Hey L, you still awake?”

There was no answer

“Do you want me leave?

There was no noise but Logan grabbed Virgil’s arm latching onto it like a life line

Virgil chuckled “I’ll take that as a no”

Soon Virgil and Logan both fell dead asleep

When Virgil woke up he Looked at the time

9:37

He sat up and brushed Logan’s bangs out of his eyes

“Hey I have to go for a bit, that alright?” Virgil asked more to find out if Logan was fully asleep then to actually be answered after a minute or two he gently moved Logan over and stood up

Virgil went to the kitchen seeing if Patton was there before making pancakes

When Virgil got back with the pancakes he planted a soft kiss on Logan’s forehead

“Wakey wakey eggs and bakey!”

“... what?”

“I don’t know. anyway- pancakes!” Virgil chuckled placing the pancakes on the coffee table

“Your the best, thank you V”

“No u, also No problem-Lo”

“Puns noooo my kryptonite”

“Ok no puns! Now You need to eat!”

“No u”

“Ah frick, I’m rubbing off on you”

“And I, You.” Logan said before beginning to eat

Virgil couldn’t help but smile at his boyfriend as he ate

After they ate they decided to watch a couple movies and sat cuddling on the couch while wrapped in a big cozy blanket

“Hey Lo”

“Yes?”

“Sleep is important.”

Logan laughed

“Duly noted”

“Also we ran out of popcorn and we’re too comfy to go get more, is there someway to ask Roman or Patton to get us more popcorn?”

“The only way I can think of currently is yelling or throwing something hard at the wall so they hear it, though the yelling option wouldn’t be as good because it might hurt one of our ears”

Virgil laughed maniacally “so you’re saying I get permission to cause destruction!”

“Yes... I’m ganna regret this aren’t I?”

“Not if you tell me what the heaviest book you hate is,”

Logan chuckled

“Probably the second dictionary I have it’s the same words but described worse.”

Virgil smiled maniacally before summoning the book in question

“THIS BITCH USELESS! YEET!” Virgil said right before yeeting the book hard against the wall

“It is not useless, just stupid,” Logan corrected

Virgil began giggling at that before

BAM

The door slammed open to reveal a very concerned and confused Patton

“I-is everybody o-ok?! I heard something slam against something” said Patton voice cracking a bit

“Everything is fine padre! Sorry we worried you, we just finished all the popcorn and didn’t want to get up so we were trying to get someone in here so we could ask them...” Virgil said

“It was either that or yelling, I decided this was a better choice.” Logan said slightly submerging himself in the blanket

“Oh it’s okay kiddos! Now where’s your popcorn bowl?” Patton said smiling brightly at the two curled up on the couch

“Oh it’s uh- it’s on-“ Virgil just gave up trying to tell him where it was and grabbed it and reached out to give Patton the empty popcorn bowl “thanks padre, I owe you one” Virgil continued

“No problem kiddo I’ll be back soon” said Patton as he exited the room

“Ok while he isn’t here what’s the next movie we should watch?” Logan asked slightly coming unsubmerged to look at Virgil

“Hmmmm heathers?” Virgil said looking down at Logan

“that sounds good,”

Virgil added it to the movie queue

Patton knocked on the door “hiii popcorn has been delivered”

Patton handed the two the bowl

“Thanks padre!” Said Virgil

“Thank you Patton, you helped a lot, it’s cold ” Logan said curling into the blanket

Patton, Virgil and Logan said their goodbyes before Patton left

“Hey I had a question,” Logan said

“Shoot!”

“Well you’ve been calling Patton padre and I was wondering why?”

“Ah well I’m not ganna lie... it was just to make Roman very annoyed, and confused if I actually spoke Spanish at first, but... it’s grown on me. So now Patton is forever padre!”

Logan laughed at that explanation

“Ah of course.”

They started the movie

“You totally want to throw tortillas at the window don’t you?” Said Logan halfway into the movie

“...yes... I wanna fight the moon!”

“Your a strange little feral cryptid aren’t you”

“Is that you allowing me to throw tortillas at the window?”

“Sure, no tomato sauce though”

“Oh I wouldn’t dream of it!”

“You had a whole jar of tomato sauce didn’t you.”

“I had to come prepared! What if the moon fought back!”

“I doubt the moon has tortillas, also Your supplying the tortillas.”

“Okay-“

Virgil summoned some tortillas

and threw a few before his arm got cold and he retired to the fluffy blanket once again

“How did you get cold that quickly?” asked logan wrapping his arms around virgil

“Your room is cold, you’re warm so this was the better choice,”

“Ah, of course,”

After a bit of actually watching the movie (I know impossible!)

“I think the heathers movie is almost over” Said Logan

“Hmm we need a long movie so we don’t have to add another one for a while”

“End game? It’s 3 hours and 2 minutes long.”

“That sounds good,”

After about an hour of watching the movie and geeking out about really good CGI Virgil fell asleep

And after a little bit of Logan cleaning up the tortillas he went back to couch and continued watching alone before eventually drifting off as well,

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angelynrostrand · 5 years ago

Text

Chapter 5

Summary: To the outside world, nothing should connect shy girl Angel Monroe and popular boy Xavier Hazelwood. But that isn't entirely true. They both hold secrets. Behind both of them lie 2 separate wolf packs. Xavier is well on his way to Alpha status and running the pack. Angel is not a wolf but instead the last healer in the world. When the realization comes forward that they are connected by destiny, will they decide to fulfill it? Is their connection predetermined by fate or will they choose their hearts? Lives and packs cross and mingle while romance and conflict brews. The story of 2 opposite souls on a collision path. Will destiny win out? Even the most innocent face, has the darkest secrets.

Word Count: 2,674

Warnings: None for now

https://livingbythemoonblog.wordpress.com/2015/12/06/creating-your-apothecary/

Chapter 5

The weekend goes by fast. As it always does. On Sunday, I spend most of my time in my cottage. I am researching about repairing the tree I burned with lighting. I feel bad for destroying a living object. So far no luck. I can't find any spells or potions to heal a tree back to normal. I have done it on a human, but a tree and a human are two different things. I sit down in the middle of the floor on my colorful carpet surrounded by mom's old spellbooks. Then I hear a knock at my door.

"Who is it?"

"Angel relax. It's just me, Eric."

I get up from my floor and open the door. "Can I help you?" I walk back inside with my brother behind me.

"Maybe? What happened here?" He was judging my messy room.

"I am doing some research. What can I help you with?"

"Well as the new Alpha, you know I have to do some extreme workouts and do some extreme fighting duels. You know, to keep up with my strength."

"What happened? Who did you hurt?" Now I am worried.

"No one yet...but I do have a job for you. I want you to heal all the warriors in our pack."

"Eric you know what that means. I would be exposing myself to more people."

"Angel, I know that. But I want you to be a part of our pack. I hated how dad would isolate you from the pack. You grew up all by yourself. And I hate seeing you sad and feeling alone. You are good at hiding your feelings, but I know you. You are my little sister and I want you to be happy."

"I would really like to help our pack, but I am not qualified. And what did dad say about this idea?"

"It took some convincing, but he agreed. Angel, you have been studying mom's herbalist books since you could read. Don't forget you also have been blessed with healers hands. And it wouldn't be just you. You would be assisting the pack's Doctor. You remember Dr. Shirley?"

I start to clean up my mess, kinda embarrassed with my brother tiptoeing around the room. "Yes." Everyone in our pack goes to him if they are injured or sick.

"Well...he told me he needs some help and I mentioned your ability." My eyes go wide. "He sounds like he is interested in a new assistant."

"Eric you can't just tell people. It is not your story to tell." I am really mad at him. He has no right. I have been hiding it from people for so long.

"Angel, I know. I am sorry, but you are always alone." He sounds sad when he says alone. "This could be a great opportunity for you to get to know your pack. Plus, you can really put your healing powers to some good use."

"Let me think about it. I want to talk to Dr. Shirley first." I am still upset with him. It is not fair he can tell anyone in the pack about my abilities because he is Alpha, but I can't tell my mate.

"Okay, Dr. Shirley is in his office. He normally leaves around 3."

I nod and Eric just leaves me to my thoughts. After I clean and put all my mother's books back in the proper home, I walk to Dr. Shirley office. It is on the left side of the mansion. When I was growing up, dad kept all the business on the left side and his home on the right side. I spend most of my time on the right side, so when I have to go to the left side it was always awkward. On the left side, there are always strangers roaming around 'my house'. That's why I love to stay in my cottage. It is quiet and familiar. The rest of my house is a business office and not a home. They just look at me with confusion while I walk to Dr. Sherly's office. I lightly knock and hear a voice beckon me in.

"Hello, come in." I hear from the other side of the door. When I open the door, I can see a couple of hospital beds and his office on the side. "Dr. Shirley?"

"Oh, Angel...I mean Miss Monroe. How can I help?" He looks up from his computer and I sit in front of his desk. I forgot how young he is. Maybe his late 20's and I forgot he just graduated from med school.

"Dr. Shirley, please call me Angel. I wanted to talk to you about my umm.." I find myself embarrassed or maybe shy about my ability. It's not normal for me to say it out loud in front of a stranger.

"Angel, I know." He gets what I am trying to say.

"I heard that Alpha Monroe told you my secret and I just want to..."

"Angel I won't tell anyone if that's what you are worried about." I nodded and looking down. "But with that said, I do think you would be a big asset to this infirmary."

"Dr.." He cuts me off.

"Trevor."

"I'm sorry."

“My name is Trevor. It's kinda weird for me to call you by your first name, so call me by my first name. Trevor."

"Okay, Trevor... I want to help but...I just..."

"Angel I know you are scared but with someone with your ability it should be used for good and I know if I had your powers, I would use it to heal our injured warriors."

"I do like helping and I have been thinking about going into the medical field after high school."

"See...I can prepare you for med school. Especially from someone who just graduated." He is convincing. It would be beneficial for me and the pack. "Plus Alpha Monroe told me you are a talented herbalist. We could learn from each other."

"Ok, I'll do it. I will help you. When do I start?" His eyes widen with happiness and a hidden smile.

"I have to get going, but how about after school and we can arrange a proper time to meet and understand your duties as my assistant." I nod. "Relax your secret is safe in this pack." I nod again, more to convince myself rather than him.

"Let me walk you out." I can see he is holding his stuff and ready to leave. We both exit from his office and walk outside to his parked car. "What time do you normally arrive?"

"It depends. I try to get a 10 hour a day, but if some patients are sick and need to be looked after, I sleep in my office. I am always on call. I could only get a day off but now that I have you, I can hopefully get more work done and not die from exhaustion." He does have a point. Maybe this arrangement can help him, the pack, and me.

"That is true. Please don't die." My sense of humor causes him to laugh. We both stop at his car next to the driver side. We both smile, but are shocked by the thunder and lightning surrounding us. I looked up and notice rain starting to pour down. "You should get going. Be careful on the road." He enters in his car.

"You should get inside before you get a cold." I nod and run back inside but before I do I turn around and gave him my final wave of goodbye. I walk inside my house with wet hair and clothes.

"What happened to you?" I turn around to see it is Xavier.

"I got caught in the rain. What are you doing here?"

"I had to talk to your Alpha about your security problems. I guess there has been some trespassing from rogues."

"Rogues?"

"They are wolves who have been kicked out of there pack. They have must have broken the law or just been born without a pack. They usually aren't good people." We start to walk upstairs to my room. I want to get changed but I want to continue our conversation. I give him an ‘oh I see look’. I hold my arms together and hold myself to keep warm. "Angel, you are so cold." He put his hand on my soft cheek and the next thing I know, he put his arms around me. Wolves are naturally warm and it feels good to be held.

"Xavier, I'm going to get your shirt wet." Finally being brave enough to put my arms around his torso.

"I don't care. You can ruin all my shirts if I can have a moment like this." We just stay like that for a while until we are interrupted by Cam.

"Excuse me, Hazelwood." I jump and we both pull apart. "I suggest you remove your hands from the Alpha's sister and leave before the rain gets worst to drive in." Cam had to ruin the moment with his unwelcome advice.

"She is my mate and I will do whatever I want." He pulls me back into a hug. "Who are you anyway?" I never seem him so possessive and scared as if someone is going to take me away from him.

"He is my brother's beta. Be nice" I whisper that last part. I remove Xavier's arms around me and walk up to Cam. "Cam, it's ok. Hey, look, I am okay. We were just talking."

Cam nods and said, "Okay, but it is late and your friend needs to get going. Also, go get changed." He looks at my white shirt and I realize that it is a little translucent. I cross my arms across my chest. I am so embarrassed. "I'll walk your friend out and I will see you later." Xavier looks frustrated and I don't blame him.

"I'm sorry. I'll see you tomorrow." I give him a smile hoping it will help. They both walk downstairs and I wait until they reach the bottom of the staircase. I open my door to get cleaned up. I hope Cameron isn't giving him too much trouble.

The next morning the rain is here to stay and I want to ride my bike, but I don't think that is going to happen. I want to stay warm, so I decide to wear legging with an oversized sweater that seems to have become an off the shoulder. The sweater keeps sliding off and I don't want to change. I will be late for school. I walked down to the kitchen to make chorizo and papas. By the time I finish, my father and brother have sat down at our informal dining table. I place their plates and the tortillas on the table.

"Thanks, Angel." My father sips his coffee. I smile back to him.

"So, did you talk to Dr. Shirley?" my brother asks.

"Yes. I agreed to be his assistant and I start after school." I am still upset about him throwing me under the bus.

"I'm glad." He looks like he cured cancer or something. He tries to hide the smile by continuing to eat.

"So...what is the deal with the rogues?' The question makes both men stop and look at me. The question has been bothering me since Xavier told me about it.

"Who told you about that?" Eric asks.

"Xavier. He was here the other day to discuss the trespassing."

"Of course he did. Jerk."

"Don't call him that!" I've never yelled at my brother before, but I guess my instinct is to defend my mate.

"Angel?" my father questions my behavior. "Look I understand that you are upset about Xavier, but don't raise your voice at your Alpha." You gotta be kidding me.

"I never thought you would use your title against your own family. Enjoy breakfast, I'm going to be late for school." I get up from my seat and leave before I say something I might regret.

"Let me take you. It's still raining. It’s not safe for you to ride your bike." My brother states.

"No. Finish your breakfast. I'm sure it's going to be a busy day for you." You know since you are an Alpha. "I'll just ask Sebastian."

"Today is his day off..."

I cut him off before he could say any more. "Then Cameron can take me." I leave the table to find him.

During the drive, Cam is silent the whole way to school until he says, "I'm sorry."

"What? I'm confused."

"About last night. With Xavier. I saw you guys and I guess my big brother moment came out."

"Well, thanks for apologizing. I really appreciate it. I wish my father and my Alpha felt the same."

"They will come around. They are just protective." Cam finally parks the car in front of the school.

"Ya, but you don't like him. It seems like no ones like him but me. I just want a normal life."

"Well I am sorry, but you can never be normal. We will never be normal. You are the only living healer and elemental on earth." I looked outside and listened to Cam like a parent. I notice Xavier locking his car door. We make eye contact. He walks up to my side of the door. “Speak of the devil.” I eye him which makes him quiet. Xavier seemed to be waiting for me. I exit of out Cam’s car and Cam follows my actions.

I walk up to Xavier to see him holding his backpack. “Good morning.” Within seconds Cameron is right behind me, placing me in the middle of two grown boys.

“Well good morning, Hazelwood.”

“Beta Cameron. Have you come here to tell me I am not allowed to be at school. Or to stay away from Angel at all times.”

“No, I want to say I am sorry.” Xavier was just as shocked as I was. “I care for Angel and I overreacted.”

“Thank you. I accept your apology.” There is still awkward tension in the air. I feel like they want to say more but don’t.

“Okay, so can I go to class now knowing you guys won’t kill each other? Because that would be great.” I finally spoke.

“Ya, go to class. Be good.” Cam hugs me goodbye, gets in his car, and drives off.

Before I can take another step, Xavier steps in front of me. “I don’t like him.”

I laugh “Why?” I walk around him to get to my first class.

“Yesterday he told me to stay away from you and now he is trying to act all nice. To impress you. He likes you.”

I laugh more because Cam is secretly gay. “First he doesn’t like me like that. Trust me. He has known me since I was 12. We are a family. And second, I bet he was just looking out for me.” Xavier still doesn’t seem convinced. “Third I am sorry.” He gave me a confused look. “ Your family has been so nice and welcoming. I just wish my family felt the same. I have been thinking and if things were different we could be more than friends. But we can’t…”

He stops walking. “No. Angel, please don’t reject me. We can work this out. Despite your family views. We can do this.”

I don’t want to hurt him. Xavier has been so kind to me. I really like him. He makes me laugh and makes me feel like I’m not alone in this cold world. How can I choose between my family and to someone who was born to love me? If I was normal, I could just be with him but I’m not and he will never understand why I have to leave. I can’t drag him around, waiting for me to change my mind is unhealthy for him. I am just an image of his false hopes. Why can’t I be normal?

#in an ordinary world #healer #soulmates #writing #werewolf #wolf pack

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whiskynottea · 6 years ago

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An interruption in the 1st law of thermodynamics.

Previously Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21

AO3

Shout out to @katnoenau for being my awesome beta!

Chapter 22. The Game of Things

source

Birthdays are strange.

The day comes just like any other day and it’s the same to everyone, apart from that one person who happened to cry for the first time on that particular date, years ago.

All I had from my early birthdays was pictures.

Colorful cakes printed on glossy paper. Smiles and shiny eyes.

My daddy’s strong arms hugging me and raising me up so high, that I could almost hear the toddler that I was giggle through the paper.

Curls just like mine falling across my mother’s cheeks, her warm lips smiling as she kissed my nose.

Lamb was travelling, and my birthdays were always a celebration for three. Judging from the pictures, we didn’t need anyone else.

I didn’t remember those days, but I made a story for each one of them, based on the pictures I had in my little box. And I remembered my stories.

Every 20th of October, I would lay on my bed with these pictures scattered around me, spending time with them, replaying the stories in my head.

It wasn’t a tradition that saddened me.

I just wished someone could tell me how many times the little me had to blow before the flames on the three pink candles were extinguished. Or what gifts I asked for. I wish I knew more, some accurate information to add to the stories I had created.

But what I knew deep inside me, was that these days, like any other day I spent with them, were imprinted in me forever. Forged with laughter and love, they made me who I was.

For that reason, I loved my birthday. I felt I was celebrating my parents’ gift, keeping them alive inside me.

With Lamb every birthday was different.

My gift could range from excavating the personal belongings found inside a tomb to a trip on a camel’s back in the desert.

Candles standing proud on a Basbousa or almost falling from an Om Ali.

Hugs and words that conveyed love and support.

Every time I woke up on the 20th of October, I felt that the world was shinier and cheerful songs would play in the back of my mind. The positivity that people hide on other days is finally released when it’s your birthday. It’s like an unwritten rule – you can’t be mean to the birthday person. Not today.

I couldn’t believe that Jamie ordered a special birthday cake for me. I couldn’t remember the last time I actually had a real birthday cake.

“You found yourself a really nice lad this time, lamb.” Uncle Lamb said, kissing me on the forehead when I finished narrating the day’s events. “This is for you.” He handed me a small box, with a wink. It was a beautiful watch, with a rose gold cadran and navy blue bracelet.

“Oh, thank you uncle! It’s beautiful!”

“I’m sorry I have to leave on your birthday.” He said with a rueful smile that then changed to something I couldn’t discern. “There are beers in the fridge, too.” He smiled seeing my raised eyebrows. “Gift from your uncle. Happy birthday, Claire.”

I snuggled into his embrace as I did years ago, smelling the ocean breeze of our conditioner on his suit, the mint leaves and cedarwood of his cologne.

“Have fun today and behave, okay?” I closed my eyes as he placed a kiss on my forehead.

“Okay! I love you, Lamb.”

“Love you too, lamb.” He said and was out of the door.

House cleaned.

Beers and soft drinks cold in the fridge.

Crisps in their bowls. Vinegar, oregano, barbeque.

Tortilla rolls made and laid out.

Cherry tomatoes, cucumbers and carrots all in place next to the mayonnaise and yogurt dip.

Dried fruits and nuts.

Am I forgetting anything?

The cheese and spinach pie!

The doorbell rang the exact moment I finished applying my lipstick.

My long lasting lipstick, that is – because with Jamie in the room it would be impossible to keep anything else on my lips.

I didn’t wear too much makeup, just my lipstick and mascara, and I thought it was perfect with my high waist blue jeans and a polka dot blouse.

Opening the door, I saw Joe and Gail’s smiley faces. Five minutes later, the swimming gang arrived.

Jamie was standing at the front of the door with a huge smile on his face. His lips were on mine the moment he got close enough and I surreptitiously checked his mouth for any sign of my lipstick.

Nothing. Cool. Maybe a hint of pink, but… I like it on him.

We joined Joe and Gail in the living room, my hands full of gifts.

“Do you want to open the gifts first, Claire?” Jenny suggested, and I sat on the couch next to Jamie, all the bags at my feet. I couldn’t remember the last time I received so many gifts.

I raised a medium sized orange bag first. “This is– ” Jenny started, but Rupert interrupted her.

“Let the lass guess who brought what!” He winked at me, leaning into the armchair’s back.

Jenny looked at me with a frown, trying to understand how that made me feel. Seeing me shrug, she smiled.

“Okay then, let’s do this.”

Gift number one was an infinite scarf, brown, red and yellow, and I loved it. Looking around, I smiled to Jenny and Ian. “Thank you, guys.”

“Did she find it?” Angus asked, reaching for the crisps.

“Aye, she did.” Ian’s smile was one of the sweetest I’ve ever seen.

“Grab the next, then!” Angus said with a mouth full of crisps, catapulting some bits towards Rupert who glared at him.

“Okay, I know this is from Joe and Gail…” I picked the white bag Joe handed me when they arrived. Books. The first two books of the series A Song of Ice and Fire by George R. R. Martin; A Game of Thrones and A Clash of Kings.

I raised my eyebrows. “No, you didn’t.”

Joe laughed, holding Gail’s hand. “We did. You love the show and you said you wanted to read the books!” As if Joe could read my mind about reading fiction instead of biology and chemistry for my classes, he continued, “It’ll be good to take a break from school stuff once in a while!”

“I don’t know how I’m going to stop reading these, once I start.” I muttered. “I hope I won’t get as obsessed I was when I was reading Harry Potter.”

“Ye read Harry Potter?” I heard Jamie’s excited voice from my left.

“Of course I did! I love Harry Potter! Don’t you?”

“Of course!” He said indignantly.

I sighed, relieved. “I mean… Who hasn’t read it?” I asked rhetorically, looking at my guests.

“Well, I haven’t.” Gail’s reply made Joe turn and look at her through bulged eyes.

“What?” He asked, not waiting for an answer. “We have to fix that, G.” He announced in a serious tone, making her shake her head.

“Ye should see the movies!” Rupert proposed, with Angus nodding in agreement. “Tis faster and more fun than reading.”

Jamie, Jenny, and I almost shot out from our seats. “WHAT?”

“What?” Rupert asked perplexed as we erupted in laughter at our identical responses.

“The movies are shite compared to the books.” Jamie stated and Jenny, Joe and I nodded again in agreement.

“Read the books, people! What’s wrong with you?” I asked, exaggerating my exasperation.

“Have ye seen the books, Claire?” Angus said, grimacing. “They weigh more than me. And are thicker than Rupert’s head.”

As we laughed, Jamie leaned closer to me, whispering, “Ye were Hermione, right?”

I looked at him smugly. “Why would you say so? And who would you be?”

“Well, I always imagined myself as Harry.”

“Of course.” I snorted. “The leading role.”

“I dinna want to be Harry anymore.” That made me turn to look at him. “Can I be your Ron? I’m a ginger already!”

My heart stopped before beating so hard that it was almost painful.

How does he do that?

I didn’t have time to answer his question, because Jenny’s voice directed my eyes back to her.

“Let’s move on with the gifts, aye?”

I opened the long and narrow bag to reveal a bottle of whisky. Angus’ smile reached his ears and Rupert’s eyes were glinting at my revelation. The disbelief in my eyes must have been evident, as I asked, “How did you manage to get this?”

“We have our ways, lass.” Angus wiggled his eyebrows with a huge grin.

“Okay then, let’s save this for later. Aye?” I mimicked his accent, and the Scots filled the room with laughter. I knew they would, because Jamie found my horrible impersonation hilarious every single time.

“So, this is the last one.” I turned to see Jamie, who for some unknown reason had started to blush.

Let the gift not be underwear or I’ll have to listen to crude jokes from Angus forever!

Seeing my furrowed eyebrows, Jamie stroked my back and smiled.

No underwear, then. Or he would have said something.

I opened the small bag to find a little box inside. Biting my lip, I swallowed hard and removed the top. There was a beautiful stainless-steel bracelet inside, with little leaves and bluebells with azure enamel on them. I couldn’t stop my smile, remembering the first day Jamie came to pick me up with a bunch of bluebells in hand.

“I love it.” I said, leaning into him for a kiss. “Help me?”

I extended my hand to him and Jamie locked the bracelet in place, interlacing his fingers with mine when he finished. I couldn’t take my eyes off my bracelet and our hands together and I felt my heart beating harder.

How did he find a bluebell bracelet?

I looked at him, grateful and happy, and I didn’t need to say anything, because he knew. He just knew. He held my hand tighter for a moment and then relaxed his grip again when my head found his shoulder.

With the gifts now opened we talked and gossiped about our teachers, eating the finger food I had prepared, and drinking both six-packs Lamb left in the bridge. When Rupert rose, stating that we should open the whisky, I got up too.

It was time.

I returned from my room with the box in hand. Everyone’s eyes were on me, their question obvious.

“The Game of Things!” I announced, excited.

“What?” Angus’ eyebrows almost touched, and I saw Joe shaking his head.

“Whisky and The Game of Things is a bad combination, LJ.” Joe stated, his raised eyebrows in complete contrast with Angus’.

“So, what is the game about?” Ian’s smile indicated that he didn’t mind whisky and games together.

“Okay, the rules.” I said, as everyone’s eyes focused on me.

Jamie’s stare was different than the others, and I soon realized he wasn’t thinking about the game at all. I knew that stare, I’d seen it more than once, and I felt my cheeks flush. Clearing my throat, I continued, “We all have to answer to the same question. We write our answers down on folded papers, and then we collect them all and open them. Each one of us tries to guess who wrote what. If your answer is correct, you go on guessing. If it’s not, the next one continues.”

With everyone on board Rupert started filling glasses with whisky. Lamb said that whisky is an acquired taste. If I was to stay in Scotland, I figured I had to learn how to blend in – with a blend.

I sat next to Jamie, opening the box and distributing the papers and pencils to everyone, painfully aware of his hand sinking deeper than my waist to settle comfortably on my arse.

I drank my first sip of whisky as Jenny revealed the first question.

Acquired taste. It’s going to taste better after a while.

THINGS… you wouldn’t do naked.

I bent over my paper, hiding it from Jamie’s prying eyes, as I tried to think what I wouldn’t do naked. Jamie’s free hand however, plainly disclosed what he would do if I was naked.

Cook. Plant greens in the garden. Open the door to a stranger.

I folded my paper placing it in the middle of the table. Joe guessed first, and he immediately identified my answer.

“Cook,” he said with a smirk. “Ever the logical mind, LJ. And greens?”

“Shut up!” I grinned back at him as he tried to figure out which was Gail’s answer.

On the next round Jamie immediately found Angus’ answer to THINGS… you would do if you were invisible.

Enter the shower to check on a lass.

But then he missed Rupert’s, who wouldn’t go around eating people’s chips. That would be Ian, the little bully!

The fifth question was the hardest one.

THINGS… you would do if you were a superhero.

The answers were collected again, and it was my turn to guess first. I squeezed my eyes, thinking.

“Will you stop distracting me?” I hissed at Jamie. “Are you doing that on purpose so I won’t win?”

“Busted!” He said, raising his hands up before replacing them on the exact spots they were previously.

I tried to ignore him – and the squeeze low in my belly – as I read the answers again.

Listen to people’s thoughts.

Be invisible.

X-ray vision

Time travel.

Fly.

Heal.

Run fast.

Transform to whoever I want.

Time travel was me.

X-ray vision should be Angus. Certainly. To see through girls’ clothes.

Heal, I had to go with Joe. Damn! Why I didn’t write that?

Now for the rest, things were getting hard.

What would Jenny do?

Definitely not being invisible. Neither fly nor run fast.

“Today, Claire.” Rupert grinned smugly from the other side of the table and I narrowed my eyes on him in response.

“Okay. Let’s go.”

I started my guesses, but they stopped me when I said that Ian would want to listen to people’s thoughts. Apparently, Jenny’s voiced thoughts were more than enough for Ian and he didn’t want access to more. Jamie’s turn was next, and he lost when he guessed that Gail would want to be invisible.

He didn’t seem defeated though, he just sank further into the couch taking me with him. I snuggled close to him, his chest in sync with mine as we laughed together at our friends’ inaccurate, tipsy guesses.

My eyes wandered to the table and I noticed that most of the bowls and plates were empty.

“I’ll go get more crisps!” I said, taking two empty bowls as I headed to the kitchen.

I was on tiptoes, trying to reach the packages in the back of the cabinet when his low voice came next to my ear, startling me.

“Open the door to a stranger?” Jamie’s breath was hot on my neck and I felt a current running through me.

“Mmm,” I smiled, content that he remembered my answer four questions back.

“But to someone you know? Would you?”

“Would I what? Open the door naked?”

His teeth on my neck answered my question better than words.

“Are you implying something, Fraser?”

“Aye, Beauchamp, I am.” His voice was burning me. I heard him inhaling deeply before he spoke again, more somber now. “You are so beautiful, Claire.”

He trailed kisses across my neck and I shivered, feeling his tongue against my skin.

I turned around, trapped between the counter and Jamie, feeling every inch of his body against mine. My hands found the nape of his neck just a moment before our lips crashed in a desperate kiss. To have him next to me all this time and not kiss him properly had made me crazy. Obviously, the effect had been the same for him, too.

“I want ye…” He whispered, his breath shallow. “I want ye so much, I can scarcely breath.”

My body trembled and my heart was racing as the whisky in his breath mingled with mine through our almost touching lips. “I want you, too.” I ran one hand down his body, until I found the waistband of his jeans.

Someone called my name from the living room and I heard the word crisps before everybody started laughing.

“We need to go back.” I whispered, my eyes locked with Jamie’s. Hooded and wild.

“Mmphm,” he exhaled loudly, his broad chest deflating. “I canna believe this.”

I smirked at him, running my tongue on his bottom lip one last time. “Can you reach the crisps?” I asked, nodding towards the cabinet.

Jamie gave me a lopsided grin and with an exaggerated move to show how easy it was for him, he handed me the bag.

We waited a few minutes for Jamie to be in condition to join our friends and we entered the living room, flushed, smiling, with our hands intertwined.

Ready to hear all the teasing.

Chapter 23

#thermodynamics #The first law of thermodynamics #high school au #jamie x claire #birthday party #outlander fanfic #outlander fanfiction

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