#i just know i have never seen the details on the maps since 2017 when i started playing

[zeynatura]

Have you ever thought that if you have trouble running an online game it may be because of your internet or your pc specs? Just a thought

[thoughts-on-bangtan]

Let’s talk: Serendipity with a side of 4 O’Clock and other guest appearances

by Admin 1 and 2

We’ve been meaning to write a analysis/theory/discussion on Serendipity for the longest time, especially after I once mentioned in a previous post how I think the song can be interpreted in a way that works for both vmin and namjin. So, while I’ll add my thoughts in regard to the latter, the vmin portion is more based on conclusions and thoughts Admin 2 arrived at. I think their idea presents a perspective I haven’t really seen anywhere else before yet, so I think it’ll hopefully be interesting.

As with any song analysis/discussion/theories, this only represents some of our interpretations which don’t have to be right and no one is meant to take this as gospel. Art is subjective and while we all listen to the same song, read the same lyrics, our understanding and thoughts may/will vary, so you might not agree with any of what we say and you are not obliged to do so. This is just meant as a discussion, some pondering, and perhaps we can discover something along the way that we haven’t considered yet.

With that being said, let’s get into it.

Additional preface: this post will work off of the assumption that both vmin and namjin have romantic feelings for each other and/or are together. If this isn’t an angel you’re interested in reading about, this likely isn’t the post for you. Furthermore, if you’d prefer to put on your delulu hat for the duration of this post, please take a moment to put it on now. Enjoy!

All lyric translations are from doolset.

Serendipity is the opening song on Love Yourself: Her, the first album of the Love Yourself trilogy, and was released September 18th 2017. Of all the members, Namjoon is the only one credited as lyricist on it along with four other people (two outsiders, Slow Rabbit and Bang PD). Based on that we can say that Namjoon definitely had a big influence of the content of the lyrics and the story they tell so analyzing the song in the context of Namjoon makes sense. But at the same time the song is Jimin’s solo so I don’t think it is that farfetched to think that he kept Jimin in mind when writing the lyrics, and judging by how attached vmin, and especially Tae, seem to be to this song, thinking that there might be more to it than just the fact that it’s Jimin’s solo, again, seems like a sensible conclusion to arrive at. In 2020 Tae even used a moment where he recommended Serendipity (as part of the digital Map of the Soul ON:E Exhibition which, by the way, opened on Jimin’s birthday) in order to wish Jimin a happy birthday.

Serendipity /ˌsɛr(ə)nˈdɪpɪti/ as: the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way.

Looking at the meaning of the title and the big focus on the concept of destiny displayed in the lyrics, I think it makes a lot of sense in the context of Bangtan. The members themselves have spoken about how it was meant to be them, these seven men, and just think about how many different factors had to work in their favor for them to end up not only as trainees for BigHit but also as members of BTS. If Seokjin hadn’t gotten on that specific bus and gotten off on that station the BigHit staff might’ve never seen him and approached him, if Tae hadn’t gone with his friend to the audition and hadn’t gotten talked into auditioning himself, he wouldn't even be an idol at all, and if Jimin’s dance teacher hadn’t encouraged him to audition he wouldn’t have come as trainee to Seoul either. And if one of the BigHit producers hadn’t seen Namjoon, hadn’t shown him to Bang PD, BTS wouldn’t have been created at all. As the lyrics themselves say:

이 모든 건 우연이 아냐 All this is not a coincidence

Timeline wise we think Serendipity is about two different moments in time depending if you look at vmin or namjin. For the latter I’d say it’s about the beginning of their relationship which, if namjinists are right in our thoughts and theories, would put this sometime 2013. Meanwhile for vmin, Admin 2 actually thinks it would be 2016, more specifically the time of the dumpling incident, so before FIRE was released. This also leads us to the main idea that Admin 2 arrived at and thought of, being that Serendipity and 4 O’Clock tell two sides to the same story, as in Tae in 4 O’Clock is the one waiting for the other person, who describes the moment in time and the feelings he had when that person came to meet him. Meanwhile Jimin is the one who came to meet him, who asks him to love him, who cried because of his feelings and who’s telling him about those feelings and thoughts (as displayed by the sentiments of Serendipity). Namjoon also wrote both, and he knew as many details of the incident as Tae was willing to share with him which, seeing how filled with emotion and deep the lyrics to 4 O’Clock are, I’m sure were rather extensive. How else would he has been able to write such beautiful lyrics?

Actually, to sidetrack for a moment, Admin 2 thinks that it’s not a coincidence that Namjoon isn’t just on 4 O’Clock was writer but also as artist, that in a way he also verbalizes his own pain/troubles through his verse even though, as far as we know, namjin never had anything that would be like the dumpling incident, but in this sense it’s more about what the incident represents rather that the literal event. As in, for vmin this was the big fight they had, a majorly significant moment that brought about a change in their dynamic and bond, and according to them it was their last big fight in general. Like a moment that was destined to happen in order to allow for them to later down the line grow into what they are today in connection to each other, but we think it was also a moment in which, while they might’ve realized and opened up to each other about their feelings, it was also when they had to realize that despite there being more to their feelings, it wasn’t the time for it.

As the lyrics in Serendipity say:

설레는 ��큼 많이 두려워 As much as my heart flutters, I’m afraid

운명이 우릴 자꾸 질투해서 because the destiny keeps getting jealous of us

너만큼 나도 많이 무서워 As much scared as you are, I’m, too, scared

When you see me When you touch me

Destiny in this case represents their career and them being idols, being part of a group destined to become the phenomenon and the superstars they are today, meaning that this destiny stood in the way of their bond in a romantic sense. They had to prioritize this destiny over their feelings, over wanting to be with each other, because they were afraid of the repercussions that could otherwise bring upon them (as well as the other members). Besides, they could also look at namjin who, in a way, came before them. If theories are right and namjin were together sometimes starting in 2013, they had to eventually split romantically for the greater good of the band, so if their relationship had to take the back seat, so to speak, destiny having gotten in their way (gotten jealous of them), how could vmin know it wouldn’t be the same for them? Besides they already had so much going on with Jimin’s feelings of jealousy due to Tae’s Hwarang hyungs, Tae’s work on the drama keeping him away from the band and exhausting him even more, and the sad things still to come which they couldn’t know at that time just yet.

From Sweet Night we know that they had a first chance that Tae didn’t take, that he couldn’t have known that one day he would wake up and feel more for his best friend, as in Jimin, even though, deep down he realized that he’d long reached the shore already. So, in that park that night the conclusion they arrived at was that while they couldn’t move forward with their feelings (because perhaps Tae didn’t even know just yet the extent of his own), he realized that Jimin is an angel after he told him that he at least wants to be his source of strength which subsequently unleashed arrows of pent up emotions from his heart. So while it was a positive event in sense of it bringing clarity, to a certain degree, about their feelings for each other, it was also one of sadness because they knew they couldn’t follow those feelings. Remember how when performing 4 O’Clock Tae cried in the end? If it were a song just reminiscing about two friends making up at the park after a fight over them being stubborn about dumplings, would he really feel saddened enough to cry, to get to that level of emotionality?

Later in the song the lyrics say:

이젠 곁에 와줘 Now, please be by my side

우리가 되어줘 Please be us

I don’t wanna let go no

그냥 맡기면 되는 거야 We can just leave it to fate

말 안 해도 느껴지잖아 We can feel it even if we don’t talk

Here the important part would be the line about how they can leave things up to fate, which can be interpreted as even if things might not be what we want them to be right now or anytime soon, they will happen eventually because that’s how it’s meant to be. The lyrics generally make a lot of mention of how their love is destined, how their happiness together has been destined since the universe was first created. So it shows a sense of trust that regardless of what will happened, or might’ve happened in the past, they will find their way back together eventually (in a romantic sense). Like, again, in Sweet Night where Tae didn’t use his first chance but hopes he’ll get a second one and, judging by the hopeful tone of the song and everything that we know currently, it looks like he got it and it worked out in their favor. The same, I think, can also be said about namjin.

Looking at the lyrics of Serendipity, the idea of them being fated even though their meeting was serendipitous, Namjoon is basically telling us that here, too, he believes that his connection to Seokjin, if we are correct in the interpretation that Seokjin is the lover hinted at throughout different songs on the Love Yourself albums, was also meant to be and that it will remain as such even if they had to step away from each other romantically, that while they used to be scared back in the day to be together, to open up to each other about their feelings, it still was destiny and that it would work out in the end. Looking at how much they’ve influenced each other, how Namjoon even went as far as saying that Seokjin is his muse/inspiration in a way, would such conclusion really be all that farfetched?

The first line of the quoted verse also reminds me of the same sentiment that Jimin wrote about three years later for Friends in which he wrote:

언젠가 이 함성 멎을 때 stay hey Someday, when these cheers die down, stay hey

내 옆에 함께 있어줘 Stay with me by my side

영원히 계속 이곳에 stay hey Forever, keep staying here, hey

We know that forever/eternity is a big thing when it comes to Jimin and Tae which we’ve seen as early as 2014 with the picture of their intertwined hands that Tae posted on twt with the wish of them keeping going together for a long time and then with Jimin’s addition of saying forever. Later during Bon Voyage 4 he also said that again, how he wants to live with his lovely Taehyungie forever, and years before that how he wants them to be together until they’re grandpas.

So, in a way, it isn’t just destiny they trust that will be in their favor, but it’s also their active wish and “work” in that direction, that it’s not just something a higher force has foreseen for them but it’s also something they consciously want for themselves as well. All because of that serendipitous fact that they ended up as trainees and members of BTS.

넌 내 푸른 곰팡이 You’re my blue mold (penicillin)

날 구원해 준 that saved me

나의 천사 나의 세상 My angel, my world

Here is where we can draw two connection directly to Tae and Jimin, one because of something Jimin said about Tae years prior and the other due to the fact that as recently as the second half as 2020 (DICON Magazine) Tae said he had Jimin saved on his phone as Penicillin. We also know that after the song came out, Tae made a phone case for Jimin with the word penicillin on it which Jimin proudly used and showed off. 

Furthermore penicillin itself is something that can save you, and while we might not know from what, exactly, Jimin needed to be saved, he did say that Tae is more than just his close friend, he is also his savior.

As for Namjoon, there was certainly a time where he would’ve needed someone to save him, from himself and his dark, less than life positive, thoughts (as displayed by the lyrics in Always) but also the world around them back in 2015/16 where he was seen as the worst of the worst for things he’d said that had been purposefully misconstrued and misunderstood, as well as lyrics he’d written which, again, where taken to mean things much different from what he actually tried to say. While there is nothing I can use or base any assumptions on that Seokjin would be the one/was the one who saved him, contextually, I don’t think it would be farfetched that he did help him and was there for him during that time, much the way the other members surely were too. Based on what we know about Abyss and the background of that song, we know Namjoon helped Seokjin in some ways with it, so if Seokjin came to him and spoke to him about the hard time he was having in 2020, it isn’t that out there to think that Namjoon might’ve done the same back in 2015/16, and during other times between when they first met until Namjoon wrote these lyrics, right?

난 네 삼색 고양이 I’m your calico cat

널 만나러 온 that came to meet you

Love me now touch me now

Calico cats are very rare, and usually you’ll only find female calico cats, meaning that male ones are even more rare than that. Looking at Namjoon as a person, I’d say he is a very rare type of person as well, I mean, how many teenage underground rappers turned idol group leaders who might also be queer and is also a literal genius do you know off the top of your head? Furthermore calico cats are seen as lucky cats in many cultures and places so in this sense Namjoon/Jimin would represent something lucky/positive that came to their partner which, if we again look at things that were said over the years, Jimin did say that Tae is the happiest when he’s with Jimin.

As for Namjoon and Seokjin, this could be connected to the fact that Seokjin was thankful that Namjoon is on their team, their ally, instead of someone from another group, thus seeing it as luck that they are together (Rolling Paper FESTA 2020), like he is their good luck charm that played a major role in them getting to where they are, so to speak. And yes I’m aware that he said that three years after the song was released but it wasn’t the first or only time he ever voiced such sentiment. Seokjin has underlined how much he admires Namjoon’s abilities as leader and lyricist many, many times over the years.

“Our leader, RM. This guy is amazing. There are 2 more older guys than him, yet he is great as leader. I want to thank our leader personally.” -- Seokjin as a concert which, judging by their hairstyles (and the use of Namjoon’s old artist name) must’ve been some time around Dark & Wild perhaps?

As a side note, the mention of calico cats reminds me of a picture Seokjin posted for Namjoon’s birthday in 2019 (so two years after Serendipity had already come out) in which Namjoon is seen asleep while sitting and hugging a calico cat plushy. You’ll recognize both the plushy and the ARMY B*mb hat as part of the VCRs for 4th Muster in 2018. So I’m mentioning this as more of a cute thing rather than some kind of definitive sign of any sort really. By the way, that same cat plushy can also be seen when Tae lies sleeping and Jimin sits next to him singing the calico cat line and places the plushy on Tae.

But, what I think is, for me at least, the biggest hint toward Serendipity being, to a degree at least, about/inspired by vmin is the fact that early in 2017, February more specifically, Jimin and Tae both called each other their soulmates during one of their fansigns. And what are soulmates if not two people destined to meet and be with each other, two people quite literally meant for each other? And here Jimin is singing a song about how his love for this person and his happiness with them was fated, that destiny had this planned for them regardless how scared they may be and how destiny (outside factors) might be jealous of them (keep getting in their way).

Furthermore, isn’t it curious how this song, specifically, is written as gender neutral instead of with female pronouns like their songs in the past or even Outro: Her off the same album? Yes, Namjoon explained in their interview with Billoard that this decision was one he made because these rare moments and special things in life are something that transcend genders, cultures and barriers between people, and love is also something that doesn’t care about genders, in this case love and destiny don’t care about the fact that they are all the same gender because they are fated anyway, they are soulmates, each others fated person, and their happiness is meant to be in one way or another. Together.

[planned-planethood]

A list of things to be excited about in space exploration

In space science and exploration, things tend to move slowly. That is, until they don't. It is easy to lose perspective on exactly what is possible when the right people are providing the right support for exploration initiatives.

With significant advances in rocket technology, ambitious programs from one administration being continued by the next (THANK YOU, finally!) and funding for NASA at an all time high there are some exciting things coming up not just in our lifetimes, but possibly in the next few years for some of these. Here is a list of things that could actually happen which will make your imagination go wild:

- The Artemis program: the Artemis program was started in 2017. For years there has been intense debate about whether or not we should be returning to the Moon or sending astronauts to Mars. This debate, it seems, has finally ended. When President Biden determined to continue to support the previous administration's goals to return Americans to the Moon, all remaining opposition evaporated as the space-science community wants to simply conduct human exploration missions again regardless of the destination. Now, with essentially unified support and bipartisan political capital, the Artemis program looks extremely likely to survive.

It's more than just a return to the Moon though. We will be building a new space station called the Lunar Gateway. Gateway will orbit around the Moon and provide NASA with a way station from which SpaceX rocket ships will ferry astronauts to the Lunar surface. At this point, what happens next becomes a little more nebulous. NASA is currently researching the feasibility of founding a permanent colony on the Moon on the South Pole (I also have some things to say about this landing site in the future that I can't talk about right now, but resources could be slightly more plentiful than is known currently).

The target year for human feet to stand on the Moon again is no farther than the year 2024. This timeline can and probably will slip, but it's currently unlikely to slip significantly. Before the year 2030, we're highly likely to be inhabiting the Moon again, this time, with no intention of leaving. The Artemis program will aim to develop a lunar economy as a way of incentivizing both more public and private investing in lunar exploration.

One thing that I'm personally happy about is that with with rockets finally becoming cheaper to use, and spacecraft working autonomously now most of the time, it is predicted that the number of astronauts required to be experimental aircraft pilots from the military will probably go down. Let's send some more geologists to the Moon!

Oh and by the way, since I mentioned way stations earlier...

- Astronauts on Mars: This has been the holy grail-goal of space exploration since humanity has realized Mars was another planet. NASA's Artemis program is designed to not simply be a lunar program. The goal isn't just to create a lunar economy: the goal of the Artemis program is to create a sustainable lunar presence so that the Moon can be used as a way station for much deeper space exploration. The idea is that with easier access to the lunar surface, NASA will be able to rapidly run tests and develop technologies that we would need to embark on what could be the most treacherous and epic human exploration adventure in history. It would also be fantastic logistical support to a potential permanent or semi-permanent colony on Mars.

... and NASA may not even get there first.

SpaceX, eager to showcase their own Starship, is currently planning a human mission to Mars in 2026. Humans have never trod on another planet before. This event, whether done by SpaceX, NASA, or any other entity, would be one of the greatest accomplishments in human history. It would hopefully mark the dawning of a new era in human civilization, for the betterment of us all.

- Venus: It's been decades since NASA has sent a mission to Venus. The number of Venus experts has gradually dwindled, and now we are in danger of all of them retiring out of planetary science before their knowledge can actually be passed on. Thankfully, NASA just announced two separate missions to Venus to investigate basically everything you can possibly imagine. DAVINCI+ will send a lander to the surface and VERITAS will orbit the planet and map the surface in high resolution for the first time. We don't really know what sort of surprises this incredible world holds in store for us. It may be that we find a planet full of active volcanism, and evidence that long ago it was habitable for life as we know it.

Astrobiologists have recently begun paying even closer attention to this planet as there have been some interesting signs that, and I say this cautiously, Venus may have biosignatures. Ultimately, it's an entire planet, our neighbor, and we are going to see incredible images, and learn so much about planets, how they form, evolve, and improve our understanding of how easily a terrestrial world can become habitable. Both missions launch this decade.

- The Search for Life: There's been a veritable revolution in exoplanet hunting over the last decade. Missions like Kepler have provided us with mind-boggling amounts of data to go through, much of which has led to the discovery of so-called exoplanets, planets in other star systems. Right now we are closing in on approximately 5000 confirmed exoplanets.

It's almost impossible to mention exoplanets without immediately breaking into the subject of habitable zones. The fact of the matter is that we're well into the numbers game that one day, will turn up something stunning that will change humanity forever. In my opinion, it's a matter of time. With the rate of exoplanet detections growing rapidly, it seems like a matter of rapidly shrinking time before we come across a truth that, if it is out there, will reveal itself.

Scientists are currently studying a relativistic telescope concept which would make use of the light-bending properties of relativity, combined with the mass of the Sun, to warp light in such a way that it magnifies the image of whatever is in the warped light. Such a telescope could reveal surface details of an exoplanet: if there are oceans, we would be able to resolve them. Same to mountain ranges. City lights.

Whatever the truth is, it may be difficult to hide from the astronomers of Earth for much longer as our sight has officially pierced the interstellar veil and active searches for signs of life outside the Solar System have absolutely begun.

Breakthrough Starshot is a mission concept that would actually send a small spacecraft to our nearest stellar neighbor, Proxima Centauri. Around this star is an exoplanet: Proxima Centauri b. What would a flyby mission see on this mystery planet? Right now, we have no idea. Proxima Centauri b orbits in its star's habitable zone. Unfortunately, if this mission ultimately makes it off the ground, it would take in the range of 30 years to reach its destination and send its photographs back. Fortunately, that's within most of our naturally remaining lifetimes. I think it's worth the wait.

We won't be waiting idly however. Right here in our very Solar System, we are closing in on a number of ways in which the idea of a habitable zone can be played around with. Icy moons around places like Jupiter and Saturn have seriously reopened questions of where life-as-we-know-it could live. Queue the discovery of the ecosystems living around hydrothermal vents at the bottom of the lightless oceans of Earth. Diverse communities of never-before-seen creatures were living entirely without sunlight being involved at any point in their ecosystem.

Scientists now believe hydrothermal vents exist on moons like Europa and Enceladus, inside liquid water oceans, hidden under the ice. In a few years, NASA is launching a mission to fly around Europa. Perhaps it well get a chance to fly through one of the erupting geysers and take a look around. A mission to land on the surface is being designed as we speak to be proposed to NASA.

Never in human history, written and unwritten, have we realistically had to contend with the idea of knowing the Truth (as Mulder puts it). Well, contend away folks. We might not be wondering for a whole lot longer. Things might move slowly, until they don't.

Space exploration has never been boring, but we are without a doubt entering a golden age for space science and exploration.

(Image credit: Steve Jurvetson~NASA~NASA/JPL-Caltech~ESO/M. Kornmesser respectively)

[qqueenofhades]

Do you think there will be another civil war in America? I’m afraid. Im trying to read about the first civil war to understand it more. What happened on both sides. What was the cost. What Americans can learn from then to help us now. But it’s so hard. There are so many screaming voices. Would love to know your thoughts as a historian and as an American.

Well, nonnie, I don’t know if this will be comforting to you or not, but in my view, the war has been going on for years -- decades, even -- and just because it doesn’t take the traditional form of two uniformed armies on a battlefield doesn’t mean that it’s any less a war, and any less deadly. Americans live in the most deeply and violently militarized of any supposedly first-world country on the entire planet, and the recent protests have, if nothing else, made the actors in our present civil war explicitly visible. On the one side, cops in military-grade hardware. On the other, largely unarmed protestors and civilians. This intersects with a toxic political climate and runaway gun violence problem, which adds up to a staggering annual death toll comparable to any war. While this may seem to come from the Department of Duh, let’s drop some knowledge:

There have been 21,191 gun-related deaths in the U.S. already in 2020 (including 279 mass shootings).

There were 434 mass shootings in the U.S. in 2019, equal to approximately 1.19 mass shootings a day, killing 2,160 people.

Approximately 36,000 Americans are killed by guns every year (an average of 100 a day.)

In 2017, 39,773 Americans were killed by or killed themselves with guns, a trend which is on the rise.

U.S. police have killed 598 people already in 2020, and in all of 2019, there were only 27 days when they did not kill anyone. (I recommend clicking on that link, since Mapping Police Violence is one of the few free nonprofit databases dedicated to tracking the issue -- the animated map is also worth a look because it’s horrifying.)

U.S. police also kill civilians at grossly high rates compared to peer nations -- an average of 1,000 a year and 33.5 deaths per 10 million citizens. The next closest is Canada at 9.8 deaths per 10 million.

And just like everyone’s been protesting about, police violence and officer-related shootings affect people of color at grotesquely higher percentages relative to their overall presence in the U.S. population.

In comparison, 89 law enforcement officers died in 2019. Over half of these (48) died in accidents. Only 41 law enforcement officers, in a nation of 330 million people, died as a result of violence/felonious acts.

Just to recap, 100 Americans die from gun violence a day.

In other words, it’s a lot more dangerous to be an average citizen in America than it is to be a law enforcement officer in America.

By... a very wide margin.

The University of Chicago Law School recently completed a three-year-long study (2015--2018) and concluded that not one of the police departments in the 20 largest American cities meet basic human rights standards/the rules of international warfare in the Geneva Convention.

So while the 21st-century political structures of America make it highly unlikely that we’d ever have a Union and Confederacy fighting each other on the battlefield a la the first Civil War, the people of this country have already been under attack for decades from a private army that, I repeat, does not meet basic conventions for international warfare used against our enemies. The events of 2020 have also, if nothing else, proved that the extreme-right gun-nut rhetoric about “rising up to defeat a tyrannical government,” which they have cited forever as the reason why they need all their weapons, is exactly as much bullshit as we all thought it was. (Spoiler alert: they don’t mean the tyrannical government as long as it’s Trump’s, and they want license, such as the two white men who killed Ahmaud Arbery in Georgia, to kill people of color at any point and without punishment.) They’ll put on their AK-47s and picket courthouse steps in the middle of a pandemic to whine about not being able to get haircuts and being forced (like communists, evidently) to wear masks to protect the health of other people. They’ll also run their cars into protestors and point guns at them for variety. But when the president tear-gasses peaceful protestors for a photo-op at a church, the kind of thing that should really piss them off for all their talk about religious freedom? Crickets.

That’s because at heart, these people are cowards, and all their talk of “defending America” are based on wildly militarized fantasies that, like most fantasies, they’re never going to carry out. This is not in the least to downplay the threat from organized white terrorism groups -- in fact, white terrorism is currently the biggest and most ignored threat in America. (I recommend reading that document, from a former white skinhead testifying in front of the U.S. House Committee on Homeland Security last September, in full.) They are the militants who are very deliberately preparing for a “race war” and who embody Nazi and white supremacist ideology, and if there was a new Civil War, it would be divided by ideological, rather than geographical (North vs. South) lines. That is exactly what these people want, and they would be more than happy to have. That’s also why we keep having these fake reports of “Antifa terrorists,” which result in heavily armed white supremacists rushing to counter a threat that doesn’t actually exist. There are plenty of reasons to be scared of that. But we’ve also seen that, again: they are cowards. They’re never going to openly present themselves because they can’t take it when their identities are exposed to the public and they suffer some miniscule amount of consequences for their actions. That is because these identities are often based on what is known as white rage. Any impetus toward being forced to examine white privilege, or acknowledge racial discrimination, literally sends them off the deep end. So if they’re ever actually put in the position of risking something, they... don’t. That doesn’t make them any less toxic and dangerous, but it does mean that all the hateful rhetoric and promises of uprising on the internet are far from the actual truth of their collective behavior.

(You can and should also read White Rage: The Unspoken Truth of Our Racial Divide by Carol Anderson, which examines this topic in more detail, and Bring the War Home: The White Power Movement and Paramilitary America by Kathleen Belew, which examines how this movement began as an organized force in the 1970s and expanded to its current incarnation today.)

In short: punching Nazis works, fuck the police, and abolish white supremacy. This has been your TED talk with Salty Internet Auntie Hilary for the evening.

[impala1967dwinchester]

Sam Winchester: Smarts

*Not My GIF* 

Pairing: Sam Winchester x reader 

Point of view: Sams pov 

Warnings: lite cussing, cuteness, dash of cockiness 

Summary: Sam shows off just how smart he really is in a game of 20 Questions

Rating: R

Word Count: 2,033

Y/n and I sat down in bed after a hard day's work searching and looking for any news of any new cases for them to work on. Y/n had been wanting to spend more time together, make sure we still knew each other like the back of our hands.

So she went looking on Pinterest, all I could hear was the clicking of her nails against her phone screen. She looked for seemed like hours, but in all reality was only 10 minutes. I hadn't asked her not yet at least what she was looking upon her phone until she shoved the screen in my face.

The top of the image read  'Love Map Question' I moved her phone out of my face giving me the ability to again look at her. I tilted my head, not bothering with reading the questions that were down below. "Why are you showing me this Y/n?" I asked in hopes of finding the path in her madness of ideas running through her brain.

"I told you I wanna spend more time with you, so why not play a little game of 20 questions!" Her tone excited, her face was bright the brights I had seen it since way back. "Okay, but if you must know I will most likely win this "game" I know you like the back of my hand Y/n," I said with a cocky attitude.

She had me pull out a piece of paper wanting me to write all the questions down. I looked at her and shook my head taking the phone from her hands. I read the first question aloud.

"Name your partner's two closest friends"

"Castiel and your brother Dean." She said I laughed not only because she was right but because she always had the need to say "your brother Dean" like I didn't know Dean was my brother. "So mister who are my 2 closest friends huh punk," she said rolling her eyes.

"Your 2 closest friends are..... Jody and my mother Mary" I laughed she puffed crossing her arms across her chest making her shirt come down giving me a better view of her chest. I went on to ask the second question

"What is your partner's favorite musical group, composer, or instrument?"

"Ummmm.... definitely not what your brother listens to." She said looking down into her lap. It took me a minute but I don't think she really knows what I listen to. Which wasn't really her fault, just my brothers since you know no else is allowed to play any other type of music.

"First off, it's fine that you don't know who or what type of music is listen. It's my brother's fault anyway. And your favorite composer is Mozart if I do recall." She looked up at me grabbing my arm and lopping it around her waist.

"What was your partner wearing when you first met?"

"Oh my gosh, Sam I totally remember what you were wearing. Of course, you were wearing a green flannel which by the way looked amazing on you, and you had some jeans on" she said with a wide smile written all over his face. "And you y/n you had on some tight fucking jeans, and a red and black flannel unbuttoned like you wanted me to see down your shirt and see those amazing tits of yours.

"What are your partner's hobbies?"

"Your favorite hobbies are Reading about literally anything, and going for morning runs." She said with loving eyes looking back up at me. "Your favorite hobbies are sleeping, an..." she cut me off slapping me in the arm her phone fell to the floor. "Oh come on now I have to get up and get your phone, but no your favorite hobbies are cooking and the gun range." I had to get up and get her phone from the floor, my spot losing the warmth of me sitting there for such a long time.

"Where was your partner born? Well that's an easy question" I said

"Sam, you were born in the good old heart of America. Kansas, Lawrence." The good old heart of America god she was the pretties but not the smartest person in the bunch. "Honey, you do know that Kansas is not the heart of America. But you were born in California, San Diego. The warmest place like ever." I said with a pop in the word place.

"What stresses are facing your partner in the immediate future?"

"If it isn't the end of the world, lucifer, your brother taking on the mark of Cain, or Chuck ending the world. I really don't know Sam." She said while counting on her fingers about how many times the future of our lives had been almost destroyed. I really had to think of an answer to the question.

"I guess, A big stress would maybe be losing me, or something along those lines," I said a sadden tone heard in my voice.

"Describe in detail your partner's day, either today or yesterday."

"That's easy." She said with sass and snap of her fingers in front of my face. "You mister wake up go for a run, come back home shower and then eat some vegan food, read, and maybe research for a case. Then you repeat all over again sir." She said

I smiled pulling her closer to my body. Even though we were already so close to each other.

"And you, you wake up after sleeping way later than anyone else, you shower maybe put on some make-up then you cook or at least try not to burn the kitchen. You then come and find me and mess around with me, and maybe you go find Dean and help him." Jeez, I had never thought about how much she really did mess around with me.

"When is your partner's birthdate?"

"Sammys your birthdate is on May 2nd of 1983" A smile crossing her entire face, and a giggle. "Well, Sam when is my birthday, huh?"

"Your birthday is on June 21st, 1981. You know you're older than me, but I am way more mature than you are baby." I had to add "baby" in there since she would probably be a little pissed because of my comment. "Next question!" She said loudly.

"What is the date of your anniversary?"

At the same time, we said "August 29th of 2017."  A huge smile on our faces, we weren't married yet but that was the day that I had asked her out on our first date. I continued reading off the questions.

"Who is your partner's most favorite relative?"

"Well, y/n your most favorite relative is still your grandmother. You know we should visit her sometime." I said trying to lighten the mood. She never really did like to talk about her, she had passed around the same year we had gotten together.

"Umm, Yeah we probably should bring some flowers to her grave to. But Sam your most favorite relative was your mom before and after she passed, and 2nd, of course, is Mr.Singer" She said her head landing on my shoulder.

"What is your partner's fondest dream, as yet unachieved?"

"Fondest dream yet unachieved? To be truthful with you Sam I don't know, maybe living a normal hunting free life." She said while looking over at the tv that was paused on whatever we were watching.

"Your unachieved dream would have to have kids, and knowing you it wouldn't just be 2 kids it would like 5," I said with a laugh.

"What is your partner's favorite flower?"

"I think your favorite flower is... Carnation." She said with her fingers in an L shaped under chin think she was thinking really hard.

"I know your favorite flower, your favorite flowers are hydrangea and roses. You like romantic flowers." I said

"What is one of your partners the greatest disaster scenarios?"

"Zombies, Sam. That's all I am going to say."

"Jeez, I don't talk that much about zombies do I?" She gave me a look like "Are you being serious?". "Anyways, your greatest disaster scenarios are an apocalypse, which is like the same thing as Zombies," I said rolling my eyes.

"What is your partner's favorite time for making love?"

"Ohh some exciting questions now! You have runners high so I would say right after a run even if you have to wake me up. Oh, and you love it when Dean is here you like sho.." She said I clamp my hand over her mouth not wanting to hear anything more about me and my showing off, even though I know I am good at it.

"Fine, wanna be like that, you always, and when I say always I mean every time we win a case. Regardless of where we are. Nasty little girl you are." I said y/n had blushing running over her cheeks and the tip of her nose. Her nose scrunched up while looking up at me. It wasn't the reaction I thought I was going to get but still, it was enough to make her blush, so I would say mission accomplished.

"What makes your partners feel most competent?"

"Definitely after saving the world for what seems like the 5th time."  Damn, that just rolled right off her tongue.

"First off, you said that like that is always at the forefront of your mind. Second I would say after we save a bunch of kids during a case." She hummed in response telling me I was right about at least one of those things.

"What turns your partner on sexually?"

"You like my beard when I do have it, definitely when I'm using my smart during a case, and of course my eyes." The cocky attitude rolling off my tongue and into her mind.

"Really, I like your smarts... Jesus. Well, you Sir love my hips, any of my tight jeans, my lips, my eyes, and you love my heart and brain." She knew she had gotten me when she said her heart. I think she knows me a little too well.  

"What is your partner's favorite meal?"

"Salad isn't a meal. But that's all I got." She said rolling her eyes while smiling.

"Pancakes and fruit isn't a meal either!" I said laughing, causing Y/n to laugh causing her smile to come out. Which only made me happier then I was before.

"What is your partner's favorite way to spend an evening?"

"You like to sit down and watch the old movies, no matter who is in them," I said

"You like sitting in the library, and snuggling while we read some books, and for you, it doesn't seem to matter what kind of books we are reading as long as we are together, besides each other." Y/n said pulling me further into the sheets and covers.

"What is your partner's favorite color?"

"Oh, Sam your favorite color is green! Just like your eyes sometimes." Y/n said with a giggle and a yawn in her voice. Her voice becoming a little too timid.

"Well missy, you sound and look tired there's only one more question anyways. Your favorite color is red and sometimes purple, and black, and green, and blue. At this damn point, it might as well be all the color of the rainbow."  I said but not before Y/n could punch me in the stomach lightly of course.

"What personal improvements does your partner want to make?"  

"Personal improvements? Huh, I'd have to say not sacrificing yourself every chance you get Sam, honey." Y/n said with another yawn

"Personal improvements. Probably that you tend to take care of everyone else first and end up forgetting yourself at the end of the day."

I looked over at her, grabbing her chin and pulling her into a soft and calming kiss. She closed her eyes kissing me back and pulled away leaving her head resting on my shoulder. I ended up putting her phone on my bedside table and turned the light off, letting the sleep that wanted to win, finally win over my body.

[charmedseoull]

The Aftermath of Fanfiction Authors with Reba Interview

Before You Read the Interview

I contacted Reba after she posted a Reddit thread titled “When a fic becomes too popular and the author deletes their account and/or work. Explained.” on a throwaway account. We discussed details of the interview during December over email, then started the interview in January. This interview is not associated with a project and is its own independent work. Reba has chosen to remain anonymous.

She provides insight on potential reasons to why fanfiction authors abandon their work from the perspective of a fanfiction reader. She also answered general fandom questions and questions about herself so readers could understand her background.

Charmedseoul is a BTS-focused anonymous historian who documents fandom history using Fanlore. If you would like to be interviewed to help document perspectives in fandom, please contact her on Twitter @charmedseoul or on Tumblr @charmedseoull.

Parts of this interview have been edited with links to Fanlore and Wikipedia pages for understanding. Any information in [brackets] serves for further clarity for readers and elaboration of information.

Now presenting the interview with Reba, long-time fanfiction reader and participant in fandom:

When did you first join fandom culture?

I joined fandom culture in 2014. I feel like fandoms really peaked during this time. [Presence of SuperWhoLock and other Tumblr specific fandoms.]

What fandoms are you in? How have your experiences in them been?

I will be honest and say fandom culture isn’t for me- so I can’t say I’m active in any fandoms (I’m just a silent consumer) but growing up I was a fan of music artists mostly; Justin Bieber, Ariana Grande… I loved the IT 2017 movie adaptation for a long time (I still do), and early 2020 is when I got into BLACKPINK, then BTS. My experience with all of these has been good, and maybe that’s because I don’t see any of the drama and arguments online- but I don’t regret any of my past interests because they all made me happy at one point in time.

What do you like about fandoms?

 What I like about fandoms is how happy it can make an individual; getting excited for a new music video, smiling at behind the scenes photos… it can bring someone a little joy if they are having a bad day.

What do you dislike about fandoms?

I don’t like stan culture at all; fandom drama, arguing on twitter with strangers to defend an artist who doesn’t even know you… it all seems toxic. While I'm sure healthy stanning does exist, I don't think it's easy to achieve at all.

How long have you been an ARMY? What are your opinions about the fandom? How has your experience in the fandom been? 

I became an ARMY in early 2020 when Map of the Soul: 7 was released, so only a year. I really do like the fandom; ARMY is the only fandom I’ve seen where there are so many fans worldwide of all different ages, and that just shows how BTS and their music really is for everyone. There is so much BTS content that there’s never a dull day, so my experience in the fandom has been enjoyable!

Did you ever leave ARMY and take a break then come back?

 I’ve never left ARMY, that being said, I’m a newbie and haven’t been here for long.

When did you first start reading fanfiction? 

I have been exposed to fanfiction since 2014, but I wasn’t in any fandom back then and started reading fanfiction in 2017.

What do you think the purpose behind fanfiction is?

 We mostly read for entertainment but there is definitely a purpose to fanfiction, as for all art. Fanfiction is a great thing for both reader and writers, it can be an outlet for many people, a way to experience things that you don't have a chance to experience in your own life. It also can be a good base ground for people who want to start writing, or for someone who finds reading huge paperback novels difficult. Fanfiction is so easily accessible, you can pull up a story to read or share your work at the press of a button.

As you’ve read fanfiction over the years, do you feel like anything about fanfiction has changed?

Yes! Fanfiction is taken a lot more seriously now, people who write fanfiction treat it like an actual novel with plotting and editing- the quality of fanfiction in general is a lot better. Fandom ships have also changed; when I was a teenager Harry Styles fanfictions were crazy popular, now the fanfics that seem to be more popular are BTS! So that just shows when music evolves, pretty much everything else does too.

As a reader, how do you view authors?

I'm always amazed by fanfic authors because they practically write whole novels for free. Writing can be such a personal thing, and it does take talent; there is a story the author wants to convey, and when a story is told in a beautiful way, it leaves a lasting impact on the reader. I’m sure that must be a euphoric feeling for the author- it means they told their story, and they did it well.

Do you think many other readers share the same view as you?

No, not at all. There are readers out there who don’t really think about the time and effort authors put into their stories. I’ve seen readers expect so much, and criticise something so little. It’s sad- people should be able to write whatever they want, writing is supposed to encourage creativity. Authors shouldn’t have to fear backlash for doing just that. Being creative. 

Why do you think so many authors delete/orphan their work after it gains popularity?

When a story gains popularity- it attracts good and bad attention alike. Unfortunately the negative affects us a lot more, it’s just human nature. While authors do put their work out there, I don’t think they are ever prepared for their stories to become so popular. I am sure it is overwhelming and that’s why authors feel the need to distance themselves from it all and delete/orphan their work.

What stories prompted you to start thinking about why authors delete/orphan their works? 

I read a story called mixtape (IT movie) and I was around long enough to see chapters be uploaded each week. I also saw the struggles the author went through when their fanfic began to rise in popularity, which eventually led to the story being completely deleted from the internet. So I thought this could have been a one-off since I hadn’t read many fanfictions. I then moved onto BTS fanfiction and decided to read the most talked about ones first, only to see a lot of them were by orphaned accounts (so not just a one-off occurrence!). House of Cards by sugamins was the one that got me thinking, I thought “why would somebody not want to be associated with this amazing writing?!” That’s when I began to do some research and stumbled across your interview with the author!

How do you think backlash for a work harms an authors mental health? 

An immense amount of feedback, positive or negative, can take a toll on one person. A lot of authors can be reserved people and they write because they are passionate, as an outlet or just a hobby. So when their work does receive backlash it can be very upsetting- it could make them doubt their reasons and capabilities and affect an author so much they might stop writing all together.

How do you think some authors manage their mental health and not delete a work? 

This is a hard question because everyone deals with backlash differently. I know some authors who are not bothered by backlash and they choose to ignore it and move on with their day, and then there are other authors who are more anxious and have to put a lot of measures in place to protect their mental health; from your interview with sugamins they explain how they didn’t want to destroy their work, just distance themselves from it, so that’s always an option.

Taking time away from social media and getting enough rest, it is important to not neglect your well-being. Finding a way to cope when you feel low; animals tend to ground me and improve my mental health- they are loving and don’t judge you for who you are. Maybe you cope by talking with friends, or listening to your favourite song. It doesn’t matter what it is, as long as it helps. 

At what point with mental health do you think authors start to consider deletion/orphaning?

I think an author starts to consider deleting/orphaning their work when it completely consumes them. It is not healthy to be fixated on something that is no longer bringing you happiness, you need to let it go. If you are an author reading this, just know you are not your feedback, it doesn’t define your existence, okay? Fanfiction should add to your life, not take away from it. 

Why do you think some readers invade an authors privacy?

Sometimes, people care more about the author than the work they have created. So when a fanfic has deeply touched a reader and helped them through so much, they want to reach out in any way and tell them so- this can be invasive if the reader is not careful about their approach.

How do you think authors manage this privacy invasion?

Stopping it before it happens; not using your real name, having a separate account for writing, don’t link social media accounts in your works etc. If privacy has already been compromised and a reader is making the author uncomfortable, then disabling comments on their works, making a new social media or changing their accounts to private would be smart. Just knowing how to keep safe online.

At what point with privacy invasion do you think authors start to consider deletion/orphaning?

When you are at risk of being doxed. I think when readers are going as far as finding authors’ personal accounts and messaging their friends- anything along those lines is scary and the reader is going from a supporter to an intrusive stranger real fast.

Why do you think anonymity is important for fanfiction writing?

When your full name is attached to everything you do, people have a very easy way to get back to you. This is why authors keep an anonymous profile, and it is important readers respect that.  Most authors don’t want their family, friends, employer etc to see that sort of stuff. It is completely okay to remain professional and keep fanfiction writing separate from personal life.

Do you think fanfiction writing should stay free? Do you think authors should be paid for their work? 

I do think fanfiction writing should stay free on the sites they originate from (AO3 for example). However, if the author wants to take their work elsewhere to earn money then I don’t see an issue in that. I am glad you mention copyright law with fanfiction in particular because the author of mixtape (the fanfiction I mentioned earlier) tried to self publish their work while keeping canon names, the author tried to justify it as a parody work and everyone was so concerned that they reported the book until it got removed. I have seen stories on Wattpad become published books to purchase, however, the names had been changed to original characters- I think this seems like a much more logical move to avoid any legal repercussions.

As a reader, how has an author’s work connected with you personally? 

I have had works connect with me on a personal level, one in particular is Somebody To Love by LOVERVMINS (orphaned). My standards are impossibly high after reading that fanfic and I don’t think I will ever come across something so beautiful again. Somebody To Love is a taekook fic that was uploaded to AO3 in 2019, the author ended up deleting all their works but thankfully left this particular story up. I was immediately captured by the incredible writing and unique plot; the story of two lovers who were never meant for each other, but destiny found its way anyway… I apologise in advance for how long this summary (with spoilers) is, but I think my thoughts are proof of how this story has connected with me so much!

(Spoilers for Somebody to Love by LOVERVMINS. Please feel free to scroll to the next bolded question to avoid spoilers.)

In this story, Taehyung is a successful lawyer while Jungkook is just a student, despite the difference in status and wealth, they are intrigued by one another from the very start. After meeting Taehyung, Jungkook is left feeling confused about himself, the internalised homophobia is strong to begin with but as the chapters progress Jungkook goes from someone who is afraid of society and what people may think, to strong and outspoken. Taehyung plays a fundamental part in this, because if Jungkook were to never meet Taehyung, he wouldn’t have realised who he really was, he wouldn’t have been brave enough to discover his sexuality and fall in love in a time where it was so unaccepting. Taehyung is bold and confident on the surface, giving little regard for anybody other than himself, but his concern for others soon changes after he meets Jungkook, he becomes a better man. He could have had his heart desires- but Taehyung was no longer selfish from those few months he spent with Jungkook, so he stayed with his wife to be a good father.

Taehyung makes Jungkook promise him he will find somebody to love (hence the title), and he does, Jungkook finds somebody to love and he is happy- Taehyung finds this out when they unexpectedly meet a few years later, this is the final time Jungkook and Taehyung see each other… but knowing Jungkook is happy, leaves Taehyung happy.

There are different kinds of love, some last forever, and some just for a chapter of your life. It is clear Jungkook was Taehyung’s forever. And I don’t think Jungkook’s love for Taehyung ever went away, he just found another kind of love like he had promised. Jungkook had to live his life; he couldn’t wait for Taehyung, to leave his marriage in the unforeseeable future, or watch him raise his kids from afar, this shows that even if society were accepting, their circumstances were too far gone- if only they met sooner, or in another life. It makes you imagine a world where they could have been together, it makes you think beyond the story even when it’s ended.

It has been a month or two since I read LOVERVMINS work, and I still feel a pang in my chest every time I think of Taehyung’s letter for Jungkook in the epilogue.

Why do you think others think they have the right to know an authors personal information?

I think in this day and age, everything about a person is on show, so people just expect that sort of information from you. Authors appreciate feedback- but they don't know the reader, their family or what they do for fun. Vice versa. You only see a small glimpse into the authors life, and the stuff you see is what they feel comfortable enough to show. That should be enough.

Do you consider writing an art form?

  I do consider writing an art form. Writing is like painting an image in the readers mind. I think it is better than visual art because when you are reading a story, not everyone is going to envision the exact same thing, it is up to the imagination. I think that is what makes it so beautiful- we all collectively love a story, yet, we somehow interpret it differently.

Why do you think Archive of Our Own is the ideal platform for fanfiction writing?

I think Archive of Our Own is ideal for fanfiction writing because they give you many options with your work so you are comfortable- it is easy to remove comments, delete an account, or orphan works while keeping your account etc. It is important authors get control of what happens to their work if they want to leave and go in a different direction.

Do you think other fanfiction writing platforms like Fanfiction.net and Wattpad are ideal or lacking?

I think Wattpad is ideal for younger audiences; it’s more visual with book covers and the layout in general is more appealing, I also feel like the stories on there are targeted for pre-teens. When I first got into fanfiction, I did start on Wattpad because it was easier to navigate. I look back now though and do think it is lacking in terms of quality, a lot of the stories are written for shock value and don’t really make much sense because of that. It is hard to find a story on Wattpad that ticks all the boxes (but not impossible). Wattpad also had a breach with data last summer and everyone’s emails got pwned so that made a lot of people move to AO3. I have never used Fanfiction.net so unfortunately I can’t speak for that one. Overall, AO3 has much more content, you can find a story with ease once you know how to use the site.

How has fanfiction writing affected the people in your personal life?

How did you find out that your sister is writing fanfiction?

My sister wrote a Harry Styles fanfic in 2014 which gathered around half a million reads on Wattpad, she got comments from people telling her how much her fanfic has impacted their lives pretty much every day. My sister and I are close and we share the same friends, I noticed when we would have sleepovers she was always on her phone and never paid attention to the movies we were watching. I think all the numbers did affect her for a moment and it wasn’t until my sister started her exams that she realised she had to put her concentration into those to pass, that’s how she came to the decision to delete the story. I asked her recently if she regrets deleting it and she told me she doesn’t at all, she now looks back and doesn’t think her writing was good back then. So I think that shows authors do know what they’re doing and what is best for them in the long run. 

My sister had a one direction fan account on Instagram that had 100k+ followers (insane!), she was always open with her interests and I found out she started writing fanfiction through that account.

What personal reasons do you think authors have for deleting/orphaning works?

The list is endless; maybe the author wrote the story in a bad time in their life and they want to delete it because it reminds them of that time, they could have left the fandom, or they simply do not like their story anymore- they grew up and know they can do so much better. It is okay for an author to grow apart from their work, it shows they are growing as a person too.

Why do you think authors get backlash from writing dark themes?

I think authors receive backlash from writing dark themes because it can be triggering for some and can bring up unpleasant memories.

What do you think are the responsibilities of an author when writing dark themes?

 A safe bet would be to tag anything relating to abuse (physical, emotional, etc), mental illness (eating disorders, self harm, suicide, etc), graphic violence and rape/sexual assault. That’s what comes to mind. And if a trigger occurs only in a certain chapter, then having an additional warning in the chapter notes would be helpful.  

What do you think are the responsibilities of a reader when reading dark themes?

If dark subjects are included in the tags, don’t read the story if it could trigger you. It is as simple as that. People decide to read the fanfic then get mad at the author for triggering them. I am not trying to insult anybody who has triggers, maybe they read a story and their specific trigger was never mentioned in the additional tags… this is what the ‘chose not to archive warnings’ box is for, with this option, it is handled in AO3’s FAQ that major tags are not necessary. In shirt, this means there may be triggering content in the fic that is not disclosed by the author. Plus, there is usually a pop up banner before you click on a story which reads ‘this work could have adult content. if you proceed you have agreed that you are willing to see such content’. There are so many warnings, you can’t miss them. It is a case of reading at your own risk, you can’t blame the author if you do not like the result.

Do you think authors are facing too much pressure from readers about what themes they write?

I do think authors face unnecessary pressure with the themes they write; they are put on such a pedestal that when they write something that isn’t what the audience want, they receive a lot of negative criticism. Authors, no matter what themes you are writing, there is no need to worry if you are writing for yourself and putting out the content you set out to create.

Why do you think authors write dark themes?

 Dark themes are simply an exploration of difficult emotions along with unpleasant events or consequences. Authors write dark themes because it serves a narrative purpose. And authors don’t have to be ‘dark’ people or experience all of these unsettling things to write such content. 

Why do you think readers read dark themes?

Dark themes are not for everyone, I personally don’t think there are enough dark works out there. I read dark themes because it interests me more, I want to know how the characters are going to cope with the consequences, or heal from the trauma. Other readers might prefer dark themes for the graphic content, this is fine too. Fictional violence is not real- we all know this, so there is no reason to be terrified. 

Why do you think so many authors want to have their work get popular?

 People may disagree, but I think it has a lot to do with validation. Subconsciously, authors want people to like their work- a rise in popularity means readers are seeing the authors work, and hopefully taking enjoyment from it. This isn’t a bad thing as long as you realise validation does not equal self-worth. There are people out there who write and do not gain much attention, but that doesn’t stop them from posting their work anyway.

Do you think a work’s popularity is important?

I personally don’t. I read a range of fanfictions- some are super popular, others are not. It is the content I am more interested in, not how many hits/views it has.  

Should we judge authors for deleting/orphaning their work?

Not at all! I am sure authors have thought long and hard before coming to their decision.

How should we view situations where authors delete/orphan their work? 

For a reader, it can be upsetting when authors delete/orphan their work, especially if there is no possibility of reading that story again. However, we need to show compassion and view the situation from the authors perspective; gaining popularity on a fanfic isn't as pleasant as it might seem, it is much more complicated than that. A lot of feedback, both good and bad, can be overwhelming. Mental health is important, and if that means distancing yourself from something so popular, then it must be done. Privacy can be compromised, people in your real life might find out you write these stories and not be accepting, or readers become invasive which is a scary situation to be in. And a mixture of personal reasons, people are allowed to grow and change and want to distance themselves from things they are no longer proud of. 

What do you think authors should be aware of in case their work does get popular?

This is a good question… I think authors need to be aware that with good feedback, also comes bad feedback. You cannot please every single person on this earth, but that is not your job- so do not take it personally. 

Do you have any last messages to readers of this interview?

 I want to thank you in particular, Charm. This interview is probably the coolest thing I’ll ever get to do for the BTS fandom and I’m so grateful that our paths crossed so we could create this interview together. You are such a kind soul and it has been a pleasure from start to finish. 

For the authors reading this interview; I am just a reader, but I do understand how it can be hard for you to continue on when you are going through so many struggles readers don’t get to see. Just know you are appreciated, and you are supported no matter what you decide to do with your works in the future. Having popular works shouldn’t feel like a burden, there are blessings hidden in there- you have made readers feel a rollercoaster of emotions with your talent, you are able to engage with readers around the world, and you have created a beautiful story from nothing… you did that! 

For the silent readers like myself: let the authors of your favourite work know how much you loved it (in a respectful way) before it is too late! I so wish I had the chance to tell the author of Somebody To Love how their story broke my heart then healed it again. Treasure the fanfictions you love because they very well could be gone tomorrow!

Thank you for reading this interview. Further below are reminders and information about this interview and Charmedseoul’s Fanlore projects.

Reba has chosen to remain anonymous. No social media or information about her will be released publicly.

This interview was conducted through email from January 31, 2021 to February 1, 2021 with Reba’s consent and protections under Fanlore’s Identity Protection policies and the posting website’s privacy policies. Unauthorized reposting of this interview is forbidden. 

Due to the casual nature of this interview, repost of this interview is strictly prohibited. Linking and sharing is appreciated. Translation and unauthorized repost of this interview is forbidden.

Thank you for reading. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask and I will do my best to answer them.

[morsquiesa]

𝐁𝐈𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐀 𝐃𝐈 𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋𝐎: 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄, 𝐃𝐘𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐒, 𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐘.

Since it is mentioned that Bianca has children, I thought it would be the time to elaborate on Bianca’s family since I realized my blog lacks the content. So up until to the point where Bianca resigns from the hunters and starts working for Hades as an ambassador, there are three alternate paths for her that I adore. 

The first possibility is the most independent and ready to explore verse for Bianca, which is the one where after her resign, Bianca never properly returns to the surface again to live there, and over time becomes a permanent member of the underworld. I am looking forward to developing this path, because I find it quite interesting to study how Bianca makes herself a place in the underworld, what kind of a dynamic she has with Hades and Persephone, what kind of dynamics she has with the other residents and deities, what kind of a part she plays in the order of things and formation. In this option, the only family Bianca has left is her brother, Nico di Angelo, but since her joining to the hunters of Artemis their relationship is strained and they don’t talk to each other, so him making an appearance is going to be rare in the threads and mentions of him won’t be joyful ones. ( I will write another meta post about this, so it’s a more detailed conversation for later.) Her relationship with her mother, Maria di Angelo, is also another long topic that I will talk about in a different post. But to sum it up, she has no family members she is actively talking to or has good relationship with.  

  The second alternate is the same as the first one, but Bianca keeps living on the surface instead of moving in to the underworld for good. She is still not talking to Nico, she is refusing to live in the camp. ( Another meta post.) She has an apartment in New Manhattan that Hades blessed with protection for her, so when she is not on duty she is hanging out in New York. I don’t use this verse a lot, to be honest, because it is an incredibly lonely one for her. This is mostly for my mutuals with demigod or mortal muses to make it easier to interact with her. This is the most under-developed alternate. This version of Bianca is going to be hardest to talk to, because she has burned a lot of bridges and she deals with a severe sense of loneliness and feels lost as she tries to figure out where she belongs in the world she doesn’t recognize, existential and identity crisis hitting hard and heavy. In the means of family, she leans into Hades the most in this verse, because she doesn’t have anyone else left. 

 The third, also known as the most developed and softest alternate, affiliated with @mvndrvke​​ and @nosestealer​. This acts like the continuation of the second alternate, because Bianca spends three years living that lonely life in Manhattan before Hades calls Bianca and Nico for a mission in the underworld. Doors of death are missing once again, and they enter the labyrinth together to find it, and it is no easy feat going into one of the most dangerous places in the world with a sibling by your side you haven’t talked to in years unless you didn’t have to, when you’ve gone no contact after a terrible separation. Ghosts were seen, old books were opened, harsh things were said, some terrible truths unrevealed, but after two weeks ( which equaled to a few months in the world ) in the labyrinth, they come out of it with amends to make, and Nico asks Bianca to move in with him into the camp,. Bianca hesitates because he already has a stable life he tried so hard to built with a loving relationship and caring friends, but she eventually accepts because they both know they will have to get through the awkwardness and heal the wounds they’ve been avoiding for so long if they want to make actual progress. In my opinion, if it wasn’t for Nico they could never get anywhere because Bianca wouldn’t take the first step with the fear of rejection especially when Nico didn’t need her anymore with his ‘ picture perfect life ’ so shout out to Luna for Nico’s maturity. In 22th of March, 2014, at the age of eighteen, Bianca move into the camp with her brother to open a new page, and it’s when things start get better for her. ( Nico is now nineteen, a year older than her, and he never lets her live it down.)

It does get better, but also, things are painful for a long while because that’s what happens when you try to reconnect with a sibling when you are both dysfunctional with a lot of layers of miscommunication to fix: you fight. A lot. But despite these fights, Bianca meets Will Solace, who is Nico’s boyfriend at the time, then Cecil Markowitz ( mvndrvke ) and Lou Ellen Blackstone ( nosestealer ) , who are his best friends. Her expectations of them are low at first, because obviously they are Nico’s friends and she imagines the mentions of her wasn’t the brightest so she expects a judgmental approach. But oh boy, is she wrong. With Lou Ellen’s kindness, Cecil’s compassion and Will’s deep sympathy, Bianca finds herself the first family she’s ever had since the hunters.

Now, let’s talk about other good things that happened during this year. Cecil Markowitz is a good friend, he is the shoulder she seeks to cry on, he is the biggest reason of her bright smile, but a good friend is not the only thing he is to her. With his unapologetic kindness towards the world, his sense of security in who he is and who he wants to be, his relentless compassion and with the promise of safety he gives to Bianca by being by her side even when she makes it hard to be, Bianca falls in love for the first time in her life. It is both an endearing and funny process to watch her try to figure out what to do with this new feeling, because she’s never been in love before and she’s took an oath for eternal maidenhood when she joined the hunters of Artemis, and pushed aside the thought. So this is completely new territory, especially she knows for a fact that even Cecil feels the same way she does ( which she is pretty sure that he doesn’t ) she doesn’t think she can provide a kind of relationship he would expect, whatever that it would be- she doesn’t know how to date, and she definitely doesn’t know the 21th century. Also, Cecil is one of Nico’s best friends and the panic of ruining the dynamics she’s tried so hard to built is really there. So this feeling goes unspoken of for a year and a half, until it starts to seep from the cracks and eventually the truth is forced out there- and she is not the only one to blame, because Cecil has his own confessions to make. After an intense argument filled with panic and fear, the day ends with a kiss and mumbled “ I love you’s. 21st August 2015 marks the date as their anniversary, and they still celebrate it. Lou Ellen finds out first, then Will, and they are both ecstatic about it, which makes Bianca feel better. They hide it from Nico for a few months, giving themselves a while to see if they can make it work or not until Nico learns in a traumatizing way and never lets them live it down. But eventually he is happy with the outcome too, and is supportive of their relationship when he is not bullying them for it.

 From that point on, it’s tooth rotting sweet Biancecil romance. After Bianca makes sure her bond with Nico is solid enough to remain steady and strong even when she moves out, she asks Cecil to move in with her to Manhattan. They both have their own reasons for not wanting to be a part of the camp any longer ( Bianca doesn’t feel accepted because in her opinion she’s never earned the justification to exist there with heroic actions like Nico did, and the stigma with hunters of Artemis is strong, even when they are former. Cecil struggles with belonging because he’s fought in the Kronos’ Army in the First Titan War. ) so after a year spent in Long Island, they move into her apartment in Manhattan. This is the first home they share together, and Bianca still holds those memories dear to her heart. They spend another year there, with Bianca keeping up the ambassador work, and they are traveling the world together, going on dates anywhere in the map they wish. A while later city of New Athens is completed, and they move there, buying a nice house and finally setting roots. After Cecil’s 22th birthday celebration in Lisbon, Bianca decides he is the person she wants to spend the rest of her life with. With a very romantic proposal in 16th December 2017, they get engaged. At the age of 23 and 24, they say their vows with their dream wedding in 19th May 2018. 

This continuation upsets me, because just after a year of their marriage, Cecil dies in the entrance of New Athens with the attack of Lamia. His date of death marks as 3rd May 2019, and Bianca is devastated. Nico goes out to hunt Lamia where Bianca does the funeral rites of her husband according to his wishes, then she goes to the underworld. She’s lost so much in her life, she refuses to mourn him too. I want my husband back, she tells Hades. And I am going to get him back. While Hades doesn’t approve at first, with the pressure from Nico and Bianca he reveals a way. There is a ritual she can make to bring his soul and his body intact. She needs a red carnation from Persephone, Cecil’s thread of life from the fates, Orpheus’ lyre, blessing of Hades, their wedding rings, and with the possession she cares the most about. Bianca disappears from the face of earth with only Nico knowing what she is doing, and she starts her quest to search for these items. She sometimes visits her mother-in-law and checks on her, but she is the only person she sees except for Will and Lou in a few rare occasion. She completes this quest in eighteen months, a year and a half, and she brings Cecil back from the underworld 8th December, 2020.

 Their life is not the same as they’ve left it, and while they are going through difficult times, they hold onto each other. While Luna and I haven’t decided on the exact dates, after a while spent in New Athens Cecil takes Bianca to a vacation in Cape Cod, and that’s where he proposes to her again to renew their vows, and gives her a list of houses he would live to buy for them from the area. At the age of twenty-five, they sell their house in New Athens and move into Cape Cod to build themselves a life there, a life they quite enjoy. Bianca is retired from ambassadorship, leaving her place to Achilles ( mvndrvke ) and taking interest in living off her retirement plan with caring for her garden at home. Cecil turns one of the rooms into his art studio and work there, and also work as the art teacher in the neighborhood elementary school. After many struggles and many discussions, they decide to carry on with their original plan of having children before he died. Their firstborn, tiny daughter Ludovica Ranieri Markowitz is born when Bianca is twenty-seven. She is named Ludovica because of Bianca’s fondness of the name, and Ranieri after her uncle, Nico ( it’s his middle name ). At the age of thirty, their son Alexander Steven Markowitz joins the family. He is named Alexander after his father, Cecil ( it’s his middle name ) and Steven after cap america on Cecil’s request. ( Don’t worry, Bianca made fun of him for it already.) Now they are enjoying their life being old, disgustingly in love, caring for their children and hosting great events at their house. Lou, Will and Nico are still a big part of their lives.

[ajokeformur-ray]

Hey, can you talk more about your f/os from k-drama Black? I've never seen or heard about that tv show but having Grim Reapers as a comfort f/o seems interesting. I'd love to hear you talk more about them.. but, of course, it's okay if you don't want to share about them yet or ever 🥰🥰 <3

Hi, darling!💖 How are you? I really miss talking to you and I hope that you're safe and well afghjkl🥺🥺🥺

I'm so sorry that it took me so long to respond to this! I've not really known how to answer this question. I am more than happy to discuss any of my beautiful F/Os at any time, but with my Grim Reaper F/Os it's quite complicated because so much of who they are is something I can't really explain unless you watch Black because it's... rife with spoilers. For most of the show you don't really know who the characters are right up until the last five episodes and then everything which confused you across the whole time you watched the show begins to make sense and it's only on the second re-watch that you fully begin to appreciate the genius of the show writers. It's without a doubt my absolute favourite K-Drama (and I've watched most of the ones which are on Netflix so I've watched... a fair few ksksksk). I really can only say so much about this to answer your question and that makes it difficult😂 I do love a challenge, though, so I'll try my best!💛

Under a cut due to mentions of suicidal ideation (mine; I go into some detail), mentions of trauma (mine; unspecified), Death and its personification, Grim Reapers (obviously) and some emotional heaviness (mine and within the narrative of the show). 

Please do NOT read this if any of these things may potentially upset or trigger you.

Okay so my Grim Reaper F/Os are #007 and #444. My dynamic with them is very uncertain – I just know that I love them and that's good enough for me! They are very much comfort characters for me. The show came out in 2017 (or maybe 2018...I'm not too sure) and at that time in my life, I had just gotten out of a very bad situation and as a result of that trauma I was experiencing suicidal ideation, among other things. I wanted, more than anything, to just... cease to exist. I didn't want to die, but I didn't want to be alive, either. The role of Grim Reapers is different in every culture, and every K-Drama which features them portrays them in a different way. This K-Drama is my favourite portrayal of Grim Reapers; Death is a friend to humans and Grim Reapers accompany them throughout their life. They exist among humans and only at the point of death are you collected by the one who was assigned to you. The Grim Reaper who witnesses the days leading up to your death (and follows you around for that time, watching, waiting...) is also the one who takes you to your afterlife, whether that's up or down is determined by the purity of your soul. So Death is a friend and your Grim Reaper is beside you when you greet Death.

I found and I do still find a lot of comfort in the thought that I'm never truly alone, due to the fact that Death is always waiting for us (according to this K-Drama). The personification of Death through these Grim Reaper characters struck a very deep chord within me when I very first watched the show and they gave me a reason to live. There are eighteen episodes which are ninety minutes long each so it's a very long, very complicated and utterly immersive K-Drama and the acting is flawless. Every single character is real in the sense that you can feel them; their emotions are raw, their personalities are properly fleshed out and they have very real flaws and they make mistakes and there are true and genuine connections. There's evil people and there's good people who are just doing their best and there's harrowing subplots and heart-warming moments and it's truly the most stunning production I've ever seen in any kind of media.

I highly recommend it, seriously. It's well worth watching, though I would absolutely heed the warnings which feature on the beginning page of every single episode. This show is quite shocking but it's also very real in its depictions and characterisations and it's... honestly amazing. So that's the show. And the characters asdfghjkl.

I feel very protective over #444 especially. He is... there's little I can say because he's the main character of the show and it's all centred around him and his life and right up until the very last few episodes you don't realise just how integral he is to all the characters in the show. He is the circle in the middle of a mind map with all arrows and sub-categories coming off of his name. He is tragedy embodied and omg... every time he cries, I cry. It's just instinctive for me. I cannot get through a single scene during which he cries without me crying, too. I feel very deeply for him and I empathise so much. He truly has such a horrific plot and... oh, god, I'm tearing up just remembering about it all. He is sarcastic and intelligent and he will do what is right no matter the consequences. He loves deeply, though he takes... a very long time to accept his own humanity, and he's... just a joy to be around. But he's also very inherently sad because of who he is and what happened to him and what happens to him.

Here he is:

Picture credit

Isn't he beautiful? 😭😭😭😭His eyes remind me of a doe’s skskskk there are multiple characters in the show who say the same thing so I’m not alone in that.

And then #007 omggggg I love him. 🥺🥺🥺 He's the oldest Grim Reaper in the show and he is... tragic, too. When a Grim Reaper's body is found, their soul finally passes into the afterlife, but #007 is so old that by now his body is dust. He will never be found so he will never be at peace and he knows it and he has been with #444 his whole life. I can't say anything here either because of spoilers, but he really is just... he's my favourite. I love him so much skskskk he's so sarcastic and he's a stickler for the rules and for the societal hierachy, he loves the same kind of K-Dramas that I do and he's just... he's very wise and he's very old and very tired and he just... oozes this sense of all-knowing. He has quite literally seen it all and nothing surprises him. He has humanity and he has empathy and he cares for every good soul he collects and he feels nothing for the bad souls. He is... willing to do anything for the people (Grim Reapers) he cares about and he follows that through to the bitter end even if he doesn't personally agree with what he's being asked to do.

Here he is:

Picture credit

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 My UWUS 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

I find lots of comfort in this show and in these two characters especially and they kept me alive in what is arguably the darkest time of my life thus far. They inspire me and comfort me and, quite honestly, they taught me so much and I've re-watched the K-Drama about six times by now and it never fails to invoke the same emotions within me like it's the first time all over again. I often like to think that they're with me throughout my daily life; within the canon of the show they can get attached to certain humans (though it is forbidden) and I like to think that they've seen me grow and heal and succeed and fail and mourn and love and everything in between ever since I first saw the show, and I like to think that they know that I love my Grim Reapers.🥺😭💖💖💖 I hold them close to me and I feel for them deeply and the show will, ironically, stay with me forever.

When I’m feeling so terribly that nothing else and no one else can comfort me, I will crawl into bed no matter what the time of the day is or how busy I am (my university work can wait even if it’s urgent; but my well-being cannot so I always come first. Nothing is worth the cost of my mental health), and I will watch even just twenty minutes of a single episode. That’s all I need - twenty minutes. And then... I feel my Grim Reapers around me and I know that I can carry on. Some days I lean on them heavily and then there are periods of months where I don’t even think of them, but some event or some feeling will have me returning to them at some point and it will be like I never left. There’s nothing they can’t understand and there’s nothing they haven’t seen and I find so much comfort in that.

Thank you so much for asking, my love, your interest means the world to me!💙 Please feel free to ask me anything at any time and I'll do my best to answer! I hope that you're safe and well and I'm thinking of you!💜

[5secondsofdrama]

Who do you think changed the most and the least since mid-2015?(I think it's the time the drama started to show up).

PIPER: I think they all have changed since mid-2015. Which, yes is when the drama really started to unfold. Because the first member to get a girlfriend was Ashton. And to a lot of fans he changed a lot. He’d shut down and be “rude” to fans when seen with her. But, what fans failed to realise is that Ashton just wanted privacy. Luke was the next one. He changed a lot I think because he was constantly seen with his “gf”. He was never seen alone. And there has always been a part of me that believes Luke does actually just want to be left alone. Michael was then added to the list at the beginning of 2017, however the start of everything began during the Sounds Live Feels Live tour. If anything, I feel like Michael may have been the one to change the most. Because Crystal makes him go out when he most likely doesn’t want to since he’s such homebody naturally. I guess, my opinion is that overall they all have changed in some way. Even Calum even if it’s not blatantly obvious like the other three. They’ve all grown up and they’ve all embraced their young adult lives.

PHOEBE: i believe they all have changed since 2015. i always remembered watching ashtons videos and i miss hearing his laugh. now he just seems a bit more cold and not as warm as he used to be. luke seems very withdrawn and he’s not as happy as he used to seem. michael has always been the homebody and i loved him for that. but now he’s never with the boys he’s always with crystal and her friends. calum has always been very reserved so i kinda don’t see a difference with him but he’s definitely matured and changed. the boys aren’t as young as they were. to be honest as much as i’m happy they’re maturing like adults i miss the old boys. they were always fucking around and living their lives now all i can do is wonder if they really love what they do now

RED: There’s a lot to take into account. In 2015 the RS article was just around the corner, Arz was running amuck and Crystal was just sinking her claws into Michael. The boys were still fairly young and very immature. There are so many different factors. Something I think about a lot is how young they were when they started touring. I know Liz was there for the beginning, but that was only for a bit. I feel this way about the 1D boys as well. Throwing young, not fully developed brains into situations with copious amounts of alcohol, drugs, and sex can mess up their development. It’s a given they aren’t going to have regular experiences but it can disturb how their lovemap develops and that is my major concern overall. It's a psychological/sociological application and I can do a more in-depth post if anyone is interested. But in a nutshell, a lovemap is the way your mind views the ideal lover, it has all these sets and expectations, how you interact with a lover, etc. These typically begin to manifest and develop between the ages of 5-8 and they solidify in your teenage years. Imo, bc of all the sex (specifically that) and all the other craziness their love maps didn't develop properly. That's, again imo, part of the reason they have such a hard time having healthy relationships. I'm ranting a bit on this subject so I'll move on. I think as time went on, the guys saw that they couldn't be as open with fans as they were when they were younger. I think they were more open bc they were young and they simply didn't know any better and we got used to having that closeness with them. Now it feels like they've gotten distant and colder and shut us out. I think this is bc some fans just can't respect them, and show up at their houses, etc. I've seen people say Cal is the only one who hasn't changed but I don't think that's fair. I think he was always the quietest, and the one we knew the least about. So it's easy to say he hasn't changed bc he is still pretty closed off, as he always was. Luke seems to have been through the wringer as far as Larzaylea was concerned, and things with Sierra don't seem to be much better. I've already gone into a lot of detail about Michael and Crystal. Ashton just seems to be kind of jaded at this point. If we were still in the YB era I'd say the love for the music and the depth of the lyrics haven't changed but we've heard CALM, and that's not the case...

[shakethispeare]

DARK : S1 - EP1 [ GEHEIMNISSE | SECRETS ]

NOTE: I'm only pouring my thoughts into this post. I'm taking notes every time I watch Dark since I heard the story-line is complicated. Also, my memories suck. It's not spoiler-free, of course. So, only read if you have seen this episode.

So, I have finally started watching this TV series. I was shocked to find that it had aired since 2017 because I've never heard of it before. It should have deserved the hype. What the fuck was I doing in 2017? Oh right, binging Game of Thrones.

Anyway, I've only watched the first episode, and I have to say, I am hooked, like a fish-getting-pulled-with-a-hook kind of hooked. The plot already nudges me in the head to start thinking and memorizing every single detail that will show up on the screen (although, I'm confident to say that I will most likely still miss some stuff). I'm sure that the makers of this series will drop valuable clues (subtle or not). Not to mention, a bunch of characters were introduced only in the first ten minutes and that’s when I feel like I have to start doing the connecting.

So, the episode starts with a grim quote:

Alright, in here, I can guess this is going to involve a series of flashbacks, probably one that is too many to count.

The date is 21st of June, 2019, and a man named Michael has a detailed mind-map filled with photos of, what I assume at first, would be the rest of the characters in the series (in other words, his neighbours). He had photos of them when they were young children and as adults. There were cuts of newspapers on a few of them too. And then, without saying anything, Michael commits suicide by hanging. But he leaves a letter with a warning that said, "Do not open before 4th of November, 10:13 PM."

JONAS KAHNWALD POV

Time-skip, the story now takes place on the 4th of November, 2019, roughly five months after Michael's death. It turns out he has a son named Jonas. I think Jonas suffers from depression after the passing of his father since it's shown that he took pills the moment he woke up. Then, Jonas goes out to meet his therapist named Peter Doppler. They both took a walk in the woods. Jonas was still mad about his father for not telling him why he committed suicide.

When he went to school, he meets his friend, Bartosz. Bartosz is currently dating Martha, who Jonas found shocking. The look he gave suggested something happened between them before. They attended the assembly where Katharina addressed Erik's issue and told everyone if they have any information regarding it, they should come forward.

Later on, Bartosz wanted to go to the cave rumoured to be where Erik hides his "stuff". Jonas was reluctant at first, but agreed to go with him eventually, Martha too. Then out of nowhere, Magnus overheard their conversation and insisted going with them to the cave.

That night, Jonas met with Martha first, who briefly discussed 'the thing that happened last summer'.

Shortly after, Magnus came, bringing along Mikkel.

Jonas and his friends continued to walk until they reach the cave, and Bartosz was disappointed not to find the weed there because Franziska had arrived first and claimed it. Interrupting Franziska's and Bartosz fight, a loud noise emitted from the cave, shocking everyone. Their flashlights go dark. Out of fear, they all ran. The last to run were Jonas and Mikkel. Jonas slipped and fell. He had a hallucination of his father covered in black liquid before starting to run again. But Mikkel was nowhere to be seen.

When he finally reached his friends, Mikkel was not with him, neither was he with his friends.

ULRICH NIELSEN POV

Ulrich's first seen having sex with Jonas' mother, Hannah. I assume a family affair is going on, and I was right. Ulrich has a family comprised of his wife, Katharina, who is a high school principal, and three kids, Magnus, Martha and Mikkel.

I feel like the dialogue above is significant towards the story. This is purely a hunch.

Ulrich works as a policeman along with a woman named Charlotte Doppler. We first see them together being confronted by Erik's parents, who admitted even though Erik used to run away before, he always returned. Ulrich thinks he ran away, but Charlotte thought otherwise, and she seemed to have set him off when she implied the situation is not the same as Ulrich's brother disappearance, which happened thirty-three years ago. Okay, so far, there have been two (prominent) people missing in Winden. I think they didn't have much luck in finding Ulrich's brother.

Ulrich's mother, named Jana claimed to have seen a creature roaming the woods, describing it to have a gigantic head. At this moment, I couldn't help but feel like this is some Stranger Things shit. Also, she found a snack wrapper his brother used to love before he went missing. Jana believes something is happening out there that their minds can not comprehend, and it's the same thing that happened 33 years ago. At this point, I'm starting to think, okay, what is up with 33 years ago?

When Ulrich heard the news that his son, Mikkel has gone missing, Ulrich ran into the forest yelling out his name. Dawn arrives, and he didn't find his son. Then, he heard a dispatcher's call claiming they found a child's body. Ulrich rushed to witness it. But after thoroughly checking to make sure it's Mikkel, it turns out the child wasn't Mikkel. I was also suspicious to see the child, because, based on his clothing, it wasn't the clothes Mikkel wore the night he went into the woods. Also, the child's eyes had burn marks for some reason. I’m suspecting it’s Ulrich’s brother. He has been missing for 33 years and if he died somewhere in between, he would not be the same age as Ulrich.

HANNAH KAHNWALD POV

When Jonas complained about the expired food and lack of electricity in the house, he yelled for his mother. His mother, named Hannah, was having sex with a man named Ulrich. I don't think Jonas knows about this. We'll see how this will fare in the future.

Hannah goes to the nuclear power plant with a large briefcase. It turns out she is a massage therapist and had massaged Aleksander, the power plant's director. He's worried about the nuclear power plant. He mentioned that it had been 33 years since the day he came to Winden. He looks like a bad guy to me. I don't think his work is clean. He gives off this Russian villain vibe who wants world domination. 

Hannah went to school to attend the meeting. She meets Katharina. Katharina hasn't completely suspect her cheating with her husband. She left quietly and went outside to smoke. She met Ulrich, who was on his way, but stopped to meet Hannah.

REGINA TIEDEMANN POV

Regina Tiedemann answers a phone call from her bank who has been in business with her hotel for 20 years. She explains the reason why her hotel's business isn't good lately was due to Erik's disappearance, but it sounds like the problem has been going on for longer than two weeks. Then, Regina became angry with the bank's representative and slammed the phone down. She also mentioned that she build her hotel business by herself without help.

In the meeting, Regina had disagreements with Katharina, and when she said that Katharina should "mind her own problems", Katharina looked offended.

Everyone in the meeting received a phone call at the same time. It’s probably because of the kids reporting to the police that Mikkel has gone missing.

INES KAHNWALD POV

The old lady who's ripped out of the Kahnwald Family picture turned out to be Ines Kahnwald. In here, I don't know who she is, and the episode didn't explore about her yet. However, when Hannah called her, it doesn't seem to be her mother, so I'm guessing it's Michael's mother? Maybe. Also, Hannah seemed to harbour hate for Ines. She has Michael's suicide note and has been waiting for the whole day just to read it. When Ines finally opened it at 10:13, the camera didn't show the contents of the letter, nor did Ines read it out loud. Later, she placed the letter back in a box and cried. Perhaps the contents of the note will be explored in future episodes. I'm dying to know what's written in it.

OTHER CLUES:

In Winden's Rest Home, an old man named Helge repetitively says "It's going to happen again. It's going to happen again. It's going to happen again." What's going to happen? He knows something.

Helge then walked out of the rest home heading somewhere, chanting the same words. Eventually, Helge arrived at the school and walked into the meeting. Charlotte stopped him. He asked if it was too late before being escorted out.

---

A man walked out of the cave wearing a raincoat with a hoodie. Who is this man? I feel like he's the reason why Erik's missing. He could have kidnapped Erik or something.

---

The scene that surprised me was when they showed Erik being held somewhere in a brightly-lit room with an electric chair in the middle of it. It got me thinking where he could be. Was he abducted? Or did he go there willingly? The episode ends with Erik tied to the electric chair, and his eyes are blocked by a metal covering.

---

Despite being a therapist himself, he seemed to be troubled with something and he’s keeping secrets from his wife. I’m looking at him as a major suspect though. Not sure if the other characters are going look the same way as I do.

MY THEORY:

So my theory is this. I think Erik is hidden somewhere in the cave and the only person who knows the ways of the cave is the man in a raincoat. The deceased child found in the woods probably met the same fate as Erik. I think he got kidnapped before, and then this man in the raincoat did some experiments on him, resulting in him dead. This situation doesn't look good for Erik, though. I have a feeling he's going to die.

Also, why is it that whenever the camera showed the cave or the nuclear power plant, a forbidding soundtrack starts to play. What the fuck is going on—

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Pluralistic, your daily link-dose: 28 Feb 2020

Today's links

Clearview AI's customer database leaks: Sic semper grifter.

The Internet of Anal Things: Recreating Stelarc's "Amplified Body" with an IoT butt-plug.

Oakland's vintage Space Burger/Giant Burger building needs a home! Adopt a googie today.

Fan-made reproduction of the Tower of Terror: Even has a deepfaked Serling.

Drawing the Simpsons with pure CSS: Impractical, but so impressive.

Let's Encrypt issues its billionth cert: 89% of the web is now encrypted.

AI Dungeon Master: A work in progress, for sure.

How to lie with (coronavirus) maps: Lies, damned lies, and epidemiological data-visualizations.

This day in history: 2019, 2015

Colophon: Recent publications, current writing projects, upcoming appearances, current reading

Clearview AI's customer database leaks (permalink)

Clearview is the grifty facial recognition startup that created a database by scraping social media and now offers cops secretive deals on its semi-magic, never-peer-reviewed technology. The company became notorious in January after the NYT did a deep dive into its secretive deals and its weird, Trump-adjascent ex-male-model founder.

(the Times piece was superbly researched but terribly credulous about Clearview's marketing claims)

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/01/18/technology/clearview-privacy-facial-recognition.html

Yesterday, Clearview warned its customers that it had been hacked and lost its customer database. Today, that customer database was published.

https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/ryanmac/clearview-ai-fbi-ice-global-law-enforcement

It seems that the NYT weren't the only ones to take Clearview's marketing claims at face value. Its client list includes the DoJ, ICE, Macy's, Walmart, and the NBA. All in all the dump includes more than 2,200 users, including "law enforcement agencies, companies, and individuals around the world."

Included: state AGs, university rent-a-cops, and clients in Saudi Arabia.

"BuzzFeed News authenticated the logs, which list about 2,900 institutions and include details such as the number of log-ins, the number of searches, and the date of the last search."

What does Clearview, a sercurity company, say about this ghastly security breach? "Unfortunately, data breaches are part of life in the 21st century."

Big shrug energy.

"Government agents should not be running our faces against a shadily assembled database of billions of our photos in secret and with no safeguards against abuse," ACLU attorney Nathan Freed Wessler, said to BuzzFeed News.

It is amazing that this needs to be said.

"More than 50 educational institutions across 24 states named in the log. Among them are two high schools."

They are:

Central Montco Technical High School in Pennsylvania

Somerset Berkley Regional High School in Massachusetts

The log also has an entry for Interpol.

The Internet of Anal Things (permalink)

In 1994, the notorious/celebrated electronic artist Stelarc did a performance called "Amplified Body" in which he "controlled robots, cameras and other instruments by tensing and releasing his muscles"

https://web.archive.org/web/20120712181429/https://v2.nl/events/amplified-body

Now, artist/critic Dani Ploeger has revisited Amplified Body with his own performance, which is very similar to Stelarc's, except all the peripherals are controlled by Ploeger tensing and releasing his anal sphincters around a smart butt-plug.

https://www.daniploeger.org/amplified-body

He calls it "B-hind" and it's a ha-ha-only-serious. The buttplug is "an anal electrode with EMG sensor for domestic treatment of faecal incontinence," and the accompanying text is a kind of art-speak parody of IoT biz-speak.

https://we-make-money-not-art.com/b-hind-celebrating-the-internet-of-anal-things

"B-hind offers a unique IoT solution to fully integrate your sphincter muscle in everyday living. The revolutionary anal electrode-powered interface system replaces conventional hand/voice-based interaction, enabling advanced digital control rooted in your body's interior. Celebrating the abject and the grotesque, ‍B‒hind facilitates simple, plug-and-play access to a holistic body experience in the age of networked society."

B-hind was produced in collaboration with V2_, the Lab for the Unstable Media in Rotterdam, and In4Art.

Oakland's vintage Space Burger/Giant Burger building needs a home! (permalink)

Giant Burger was once an East Bay institution, known for its burgers and its gorgeous googie architecture.

https://localwiki.org/oakland/Giant_Burger

One of the very last Giant Burger buildings is now under threat. Though the Telegraph Ave location was rescued in 2015 and converted to a "Space Burger," it's now seeking a new home because it is in the path of the Eastline project.

https://insidescoopsf.sfgate.com/blog/2015/02/24/space-burger-launches-in-uptown-oakland/

The Oakland Heritage Alliance is hoping someone will rescue and move the building: " Do you have an idea for a new location for this mid-century icon? Please contact info@oaklandheritage.org if you know of an appropriate lot, project, or site, preferably downtown."

(Image CC BY-SA, Our Oakland)

Fan-made reproduction of the Tower of Terror (permalink)

Orangele set out to re-create the Walt Disney World Twilight Zone Tower of Terror elevator loading zone in the entry area to their home theater. He's not only done an impressive re-make of the set, but he's also augmented it with FANTASTIC gimmicks.

https://www.hometheaterforum.com/community/threads/the-tower-of-terror-theater.365747/

It's not merely that's he's created a rain, thunder and lightning effect outside the patio doors…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4QMzN0v4mJQ

Nor has he merely created props like this gimmicked side table that flips over at the press of a button.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kY7gQLMnbeA

He's also created HIS OWN ROD SERLING DEEPFAKE.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=2&v=MIsjYJwOXSU

I kinda seriously love that he left Rod's cigarette in. The Disney version looks…uncanny.

Not shown: "exploding fuse box with simulated smoke and fire, motorized lighted elevator dial, motorized/lighted pressure gauge, video monitor playing Tower of Terror ride sequence seen through the elevator door wrap, motorized "elevator door'"

He notes, "I was once married, but now as a single person, I can do whatever I want, haha. NEVER getting married again."

Drawing the Simpsons with pure CSS (permalink)

Implementing animated Simpsons illustrations in CSS isn't the most practical web-coding demo I've seen, but it's among the most impressive. Bravo, Chris Pattle!

(not shown: the eyes animate and blink!)

https://pattle.github.io/simpsons-in-css/

#bart .head .hair1 { top: 22px; left: 0px; width: 6px; height: 7px; -webkit-transform: rotate(-22deg) skew(-7deg, 51deg); -ms-transform: rotate(-22deg) skew(-7deg, 51deg); transform: rotate(-22deg) skew(-7deg, 51deg); }

I especially love the quick-reference buttons to see the raw CSS. It reminds me of nothing so much as the incredibly complex Logo programs I used to write on my Apple ][+ in the 1980s, drawing very complicated, vector-based sprites and glyphs.

https://github.com/pattle/simpsons-in-css/blob/master/css/bart.css

Most interesting is the way that this modular approach to graphics allows for this kind of simple, in-browser transformation.

Let's Encrypt issues its billionth cert (permalink)

When the AT&T whistleblower Mark Klein walked into EFF's offices in 2005 to reveal that his employers had ordered him to help the NSA spy on the entire internet, it was a bombshell.

https://www.eff.org/tags/mark-klein

The Snowden papers revealed the scope of the surveillance in fine and alarming detail. According to his memoir, Snowden was motivated to blow the whistle when he witnessed then-NSA Director James Clapper lie to Senator Ron Wyden about the Klein matter.

Since that day in 2005, privacy advocates have been fretting about just how EASY it was to spy on the whole internet. So much of that was down to the fact that the net wasn't encrypted by default.

This was especially keen for @EFF. After all, we made our bones by suing the NSA in the 90s and winning the right for civilians to access working cryptography (we did it by establishing that "Code is speech" for the purposes of the First Amendment).

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2015/04/remembering-case-established-code-speech

Crypto had been legal since 1992, but by Klein's 2005 disclosures, it was still a rarity. 8 years later — at the Snowden moment — the web was STILL mostly plaintext. How could we encrypt the web to save it from mass surveillance?

So in 2014, we joined forces with Mozilla, the University of Michigan and Akamai to create Let's Encrypt, a project to give anyone and everyone free TLS certificates, the key component needed to encrypt the requests your web-server exchanges with your readers.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Let%27s_Encrypt

Encrypting the web was an uphill climb: by 2017, Let's Encrypt had issued 100m certificates, tipping the web over so that the majority of traffic (58%) was encrypted. Today, Let's Encrypt has issued ONE BILLION certs, and 81% of pageloads use HTTPS (in the USA, it's 91%)! This is astonishing, bordering on miraculous. If this had been the situation back in 2005, there would have been no NSA mass surveillance.

Even more astonishing: there are only 11 full-timers on the Let's Encrypt team, plus a few outside contractors and part-timers. A group of people who could fit in a minibus managed to encrypt virtually the entire internet.

https://letsencrypt.org/2020/02/27/one-billion-certs.html

There are lots of reasons to factor technology (and technologists) in any plan for social change, but this illustrates one of the primary tactical considerations. "Architecture is Politics" (as Mitch Kapor said when he co-founded EFF), and the architectural choices that small groups of skilled people make can reach all the way around the world.

This kind of breathtaking power is what inspires so many people to become technologists: the force-multiplier effect of networked code can imbue your work with global salience (for good or ill). It's why we should be so glad of the burgeoning tech and ethics movement, from Tech Won't Build It to the Googler Uprising. And it's especially why we should be excited about the proliferation of open syllabi for teaching tech and ethics.

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1jWIrA8jHz5fYAW4h9CkUD8gKS5V98PDJDymRf8d9vKI/edit#gid=0

It's also the reason I'm so humbled and thrilled when I hear from technologists that their path into the field started with my novel Little Brother, whose message isn't "Tech is terrible," but, "This will all be so great, if we don't screw it up."

https://craphound.com/littlebrother

(and I should probably mention here that the third Little Brother book, Attack Surface, comes out in October and explicitly wrestles with the question of ethics, agency, and allyship in tech).

https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250757531

AI Dungeon Master (permalink)

Since 2018, Lara martin has been using machine learning to augment the job of the Dungeon Master, with the goal of someday building a fully autonomous, robotic DM.

https://laramartin.net/

AI Dungeon Master is a blend of ML techniques and "old-fashioned rule-based features" to create a centaur DM that augments a human DM's imagination with the power of ML, natural language processing, and related techniques.

She's co-author of a new paper about the effort, "Story Realization: Expanding Plot Events into Sentences" which "describes a way algorithms to use "events," consisting of a subject, verb, object, and other elements, to make a coherent narrative."

https://aaai.org/Papers/AAAI/2020GB/AAAI-AmmanabroluP.6647.pdf

The system uses training data (plots from Doctor Who, Futurama, and X-Files) to expand text-snippets into plotlines that continue the action. It's a bit of a dancing bear, though, an impressive achievement that's not quite ready for primetime ("We're nowhere close to this being a reality yet").

https://www.wired.com/story/forget-chess-real-challenge-teaching-ai-play-dandd/

This may bring to mind AI Dungeon, the viral GPT-2-generated dungeon crawler from December.

https://aidungeon.io/

As Will Knight writes, "Playing AI Dungeon often feels more like a maddening improv session than a text adventure."

Knight proposes that "AI DM" might be the next big symbolic challenge for machine learning, the 2020s equivalent to "AI Go player" or "AI chess master."

How to lie with (coronavirus) maps (permalink)

The media around the coronavirus outbreak is like a masterclass in the classic "How to Lie With Maps."

https://www.press.uchicago.edu/ucp/books/book/chicago/H/bo27400568.html

Self-described "cartonerd" Kenneth Field's prescriptions for mapmakers wanting to illustrate the spread of coronavirus is a superb read about data visualization, responsibility, and clarity.

https://www.esri.com/arcgis-blog/products/product/mapping/mapping-coronavirus-responsibly/

Both of these images are representing the same data. Look at the map and you might get the impression that coronavirus infections are at high levels across all of China's provinces. Look at the bar-chart and you'll see that it's almost entire Hubei.

Here's a proposed way to represent the same data on a map without misleading people.

Another point that jumped out: stop coloring maps in red!

"We're mapping a human health tragedy that may get way worse before it subsides. Do we really want the map to be screaming bright red? Red can connotate death, still statistically extremely rare for coronavirus."

This day in history (permalink)

#5yrsago Ad-hoc museums of a failing utopia: photos of Soviet shop-windows https://boingboing.net/2015/02/28/ad-hoc-museums-of-a-failing-ut.html

#5yrsago First-hand reports of torture from Homan Square, Chicago PD's "black site" https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2015/feb/27/chicago-abusive-confinment-homan-square

#1yrago EFF's roadmap for a 21st Century antitrust doctrine https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2019/02/antitrust-enforcement-needs-evolve-21st-century

#1yrago Yet another study shows that the most effective "anti-piracy" strategy is good products at a fair price https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/3kg7pv/studies-keep-showing-that-the-best-way-to-stop-piracy-is-to-offer-cheaper-better-alternatives

#1yrago London's awful estate agents are cratering, warning of a "prolonged downturn" in the housing market https://www.bbc.com/news/business-47389160

#1yrago Bad security design made it easy to spy on video from Ring doorbells and insert fake video into their feeds https://web.archive.org/web/20190411195308/https://dojo.bullguard.com/dojo-by-bullguard/blog/ring/

#1yrago Amazon killed Seattle's homelessness-relief tax by threatening not to move into a massive new building, then they canceled the move anyway https://www.seattletimes.com/business/amazon/huge-downtown-seattle-office-space-that-amazon-had-leased-is-reportedly-put-on-market/

#1yrago The "Reputation Management" industry continues to depend on forged legal documents https://www.techdirt.com/articles/20190216/15544941616/pissed-consumer-exposes-new-york-luxury-car-dealers-use-bogus-notarized-letters-to-remove-critical-reviews.shtml

Colophon (permalink)

Today's top sources: Allegra of Oakland Heritage Alliance, Waxy (https://waxy.org/), We Make Money Not Art (https://we-make-money-not-art.com/), Sam Posten (https://twitter.com/Navesink), Slashdot (https://slashdot.org), Kottke (https://kottke.org) and Four Short Links (https://www.oreilly.com/feed/four-short-links).

Hugo nominators! My story "Unauthorized Bread" is eligible in the Novella category and you can read it free on Ars Technica: https://arstechnica.com/gaming/2020/01/unauthorized-bread-a-near-future-tale-of-refugees-and-sinister-iot-appliances/

Upcoming appearances:

Canada Reads Kelowna: March 5, 6PM, Kelowna Library, 1380 Ellis Street, with CBC's Sarah Penton https://www.eventbrite.ca/e/cbc-radio-presents-in-conversation-with-cory-doctorow-tickets-96154415445

Currently writing: I just finished a short story, "The Canadian Miracle," for MIT Tech Review. It's a story set in the world of my next novel, "The Lost Cause," a post-GND novel about truth and reconciliation. I'm getting geared up to start work on the novel now, though the timing is going to depend on another pending commission (I've been solicited by an NGO) to write a short story set in the world's prehistory.

Currently reading: Just started Lauren Beukes's forthcoming Afterland: it's Y the Last Man plus plus, and two chapters in, it's amazeballs. Last week, I finished Andrea Bernstein's "American Oligarchs" this week; it's a magnificent history of the Kushner and Trump families, showing how they cheated, stole and lied their way into power. I'm getting really into Anna Weiner's memoir about tech, "Uncanny Valley." I just loaded Matt Stoller's "Goliath" onto my underwater MP3 player and I'm listening to it as I swim laps.

Latest podcast: Gopher: When Adversarial Interoperability Burrowed Under the Gatekeepers' Fortresses: https://craphound.com/podcast/2020/02/24/gopher-when-adversarial-interoperability-burrowed-under-the-gatekeepers-fortresses/

Upcoming books: "Poesy the Monster Slayer" (Jul 2020), a picture book about monsters, bedtime, gender, and kicking ass. Pre-order here: https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781626723627?utm_source=socialmedia&utm_medium=socialpost&utm_term=na-poesycorypreorder&utm_content=na-preorder-buynow&utm_campaign=9781626723627

(we're having a launch for it in Burbank on July 11 at Dark Delicacies and you can get me AND Poesy to sign it and Dark Del will ship it to the monster kids in your life in time for the release date).

"Attack Surface": The third Little Brother book, Oct 20, 2020.

"Little Brother/Homeland": A reissue omnibus edition with a very special, s00per s33kr1t intro.

[hovercraft79]

And Lay Your Finger Anywhere Down

Chapters: 1 (may eventually become part of a series)

Word Count: 2,509

Fandom: The Worst Witch (TV 2017)

Rating: Teen

Warnings: some alcohol consumption

Summary: The confinement is over and Hecate is free to see world beyond Cackle’s Academy. With Pippa by her side, she’s ready for her first adventure.  

Notes: Oh, the difference being away all summer makes! My Library AU will in no way be done on time, but I decided to put the week I spent at Tales of the Cocktail to good use. Hopefully, Pippa and Hecate will enjoy their trip to The Big Easy as much as we did.

Once again, I owe Sparky my thanks for editing and helping me remember the details of our trip.  I promise I will use those women from Pat O’Brien’s piano bar in a fic at some point. Any errors are from me fussing with it after Sparky was through.

The title of this story comes from the Indigo Girls song ‘Get Out the Map.’

Prompt: “have you ever done this before?”

“Do I look alright, Pip?” Hecate met Pippa’s eyes in the mirror as she nervously smoothed the floral sundress over her hips.

“You look absolutely stunning, darling. I knew that poppy pattern would suit.” She crossed the hotel room, stilling Hecate’s hands by taking them in her own.

Seeing their joined hands warmed Pippa’s heart and set her magic fizzing through her veins. She couldn’t believe that they were here - it had only been two weeks since they’d finally, truly reconciled. Sure, things had thawed after the Spelling Bee, but they’d definitely still been at odds when the Council had asked her to oversee Cackle’s. And Hecate had been even more reserved since the Founding Stone incident. But when Pippa had heard about the latest disaster at Cackle’s, where once again Hecate had been at the center of the danger, Pippa couldn’t stand it any longer. She’d transferred straight to Hecate’s rooms, dumping herself - and the contents of her stomach - unceremoniously onto the rug at Hecate’s feet. They’d talked for hours that day, Pippa holding Hecate through tears as she recounted everything that had happened with Indigo Moon and her subsequent confinement. She’d gone back every day since then. Sometimes they’d talked about the past, other times they’d talked about nothing really at all. And once, for a few blushing, heady moments, they’d talked about the future. Their future. 

It hadn’t all been talk, though. Pippa had accompanied Hecate on her first forays out into the world. They’d walked beyond the limits of the academy; they’d gone for tea in the local village. They’d even visited Indigo at the Hubble’s, enduring an awkward evening of pizza and Pictionary.

They’d also spent an afternoon looking through a scrapbook, of sorts, that Hecate had compiled over the years - page after page of places that Hecate had dreamed of visiting. The book held dozens of locations from all over the world, each page filled with carefully cut and glued pictures, meticulously researched descriptions, and a list of things Hecate wanted to do there. Finally, Pippa couldn’t take it anymore. Let’s go, she’d said, open it up to a random page and let’s go.

And in the biggest shock of a week of big shocks, Hecate had agreed.

So here she was, sitting in a hotel room in Louisiana, with Hecate. And they were friends again. Really friends. Maybe on their way to being more than friends. She hoped so. It didn’t matter that there were two beds in this hotel room. She was here. Hecate was here. The rest would come. Or it wouldn’t. She still had more than she’d ever thought she’d have again with Hecate. She had Hiccup back - a Hiccup who was suddenly worried about how she looked in a sundress.

Hecate rolled her eyes, pointedly ignoring the faint blush creeping across her cheeks. “That’s not what I meant.” She flounced the skirt. “Will I pass as Ordinary?” The fear of being discovered out in the Ordinary world never completely quit squirming in the pit of her stomach - no matter how much she tried to pretend otherwise.

Smiling gently, Pippa turned Hecate away from the mirror. “No one who sees you would ever think of you as ordinary, Hiccup. Extraordinary, perhaps, but never ordinary.” She waved her fingers and Hecate’s pocket watch sparkled and shrank down to the size of a small necklace. “But no worries. No one will ever suspect that you’re anything other than a beautiful, intelligent, non-magical woman.” Pippa waited for Hecate to process what she’d said, squeezing her hands again once Hecate nodded. “Dinner first then?”

“Dinner first.”

Pippa magicked their purses into their hands and followed Hecate out of their hotel room and down to the street. It was hard to believe that they’d woken up that morning in their own beds in their own schools. Now, thanks to a bit of magic, here they were, walking shoulder to shoulder down Bourbon Street in New Orleans. Pippa certainly hadn’t expected New Orleans when they’d cast the randomizing spell. She wouldn’t expect Hecate to even have it in her scrapbook. Then again, Hecate had been nothing like Pippa expected since her confinement had been lifted. She’d thought Hecate would be…hesitant…overwhelmed… She’d expected to ease Hecate into her first tentative forays away from Cackle’s.

She did not expect to be dragged along behind Hecate as she rushed out to explore the world she’d only seen through books, television and the internet. It may have been unexpected, but Pippa loved every minute of it.

“Careful, Pipsqueak!” Hecate pulled Pippa out of the street just as a brass band fired up an exuberant rendition of ‘Down by the Riverside’, kicking off what looked like an impromptu parade. “Look! It’s a wedding parade! I was hoping to see one of these while we were here!” She pointed Pippa towards the bride and groom, still in their formal wear, holding hands and twirling fancy parasols as they danced down the street. Hecate bounced and clapped; her infectious enthusiasm soon had Pippa clapping as well.

The band, gleaming brass and crisp white uniforms, marched past, giving way to vibrant flashes of green and gold. Two young men, clad head to toe in elaborate feathered costumes, danced along behind the band. Pippa had never seen so many feathers! The man in gold blew Pippa a kiss when he caught her staring.

“They’re beautiful, aren’t they, Pip?” Hecate looked down as a young boy in a tiny tuxedo tugged at her skirt, holding out a stamped handkerchief.

Pippa took in Hecate, smiling and relaxed in her summery dress, the late neon bar lights reflecting a rainbow in her hair. “Very beautiful.” Hecate glanced back at her, a shy smile on her lips.

“Flatterer.” Hecate waved her new handkerchief in Pippa’s face. “Come on, Pipsqueak, let’s take a stroll.” She grabbed Hecate’s hand and pulled her into the street with the rest of the wedding celebrants. “Isn’t this fun?” She waved up to onlookers cheering from the balconies above them. One young man tossed a strand of shiny green beads down to her.

Pippa twirled along behind her, enjoying the way Hecate’s hips swayed to the music. “We don’t even know these people!”

“Doesn’t matter!” Hecate waved her handkerchief at the people still on the sidewalk. “We can still be happy for them, can’t we?” She lifted Pippa’s hand and spun her around. “True love is worth celebrating!”

And waiting for, Pippa thought.

  “Have you ever done this before, sugar?” Beverly, their waitress,

Two sets of wide eyes stared down at the tray of raw oysters. “N-noooo…” Hecate poked at one of the gray blobs glistening in a bed of ice. “Do you just…eat it with a fork?”

“Well, you could…”

Hecate’s head bobbed up and down. “But that wouldn’t be the proper way to do it, would it?” Beverly shook her head ‘no.’ “Very well then, if you don’t mind explaining, we’d rather do it properly, right Pip?”

Pippa’s eyes jerked up from the tray. She really wasn’t sure about this anymore… “What - what are you supposed to do?”

“Well, if you aren’t sure, sugar, you can put the oyster on a cracker, add a little lemon and cocktail sauce, some Tabasco if you want it spicy and then pop that whole thing right in there.”

“And if you are sure?” Hecate asked, struggling to keep a smirk off her face. She wasn’t sure she’d ever seen Pippa quite so discombobulated.

“Keep it in the shell, add the extras and slurp it up.” Beverly pantomimed tipping an oyster into her mouth. She did enjoy serving oysters to first timers. She noted the dark-haired one had gone a little paler. “Just let me know if I can do anything else for you. Do you need another cocktail, miss?” She gestured at Pippa’s almost empty glass. “You had the French 75, right, sugar?”

“Yes, please,” Pippa thumped the table, “keep ‘em coming, I think.”

“Sure thing. I’ll let you two get down to it.” Beverly turned to go, then paused and turned back. “Don’t forget what they say about oysters, girls.” With that she sashayed to the bar to put in the order for Pippa’s drink.

Pippa still eyed the tray skeptically. “What do they say about oysters?”

Hecate opened a package of crackers, placing one on the small plate in front of Pippa. “I suppose she could be referring to their high zinc content and reputation as brain food.” She squeezed a lemon over two oysters and added a healthy scoop of cocktail sauce. “Or she may be referencing the myth that you should only eat oysters in months that end in the letter ‘R.’” She sprinkled both with a drop of hot sauce. “But my guess is that she’s talking about the lowly oyster’s reputation as an aphrodisiac.” She winked at Pippa and slid one of the doctored oysters onto the cracker on Pippa’s plate. “On three?”

Pippa sat up straighter upon hearing the part about the aphrodisiac. Not that she needed any help in that department – Hecate couldn’t be more attractive as far as she was concerned. “Well, you hardly need to ply me with oysters, Hiccup. Whenever you’re ready, I promise you that I am.”

“I know. And… thank you for being patient, Pip. I know we’ve waited our whole lives to be together, but…” Here her smile faltered. Putting her jumble of feelings into coherent sentences always seemed to be too much.

“Hecate,” Pippa covered Hecate’s hand with her own. “We are together. In New Orleans. About to eat oysters.” She gave Hecate’s hand a squeeze. “It’s more than I ever hoped for, darling. Now, before I lose my nerve. ONETWOTHREE!” Pippa scooped up the cracker and stuffed the whole thing in her mouth before she could change her mind. “Mmpf… not tha’ badth.”

Hecate scrambled to keep up, tossing her oyster back with enough force to send a bit of juice dribbling down her chin. She chewed…and chewed… her frown deepening. “Ugh…” Forcing herself to swallow, she grabbed the first thing that came to hand – her cocktail, a Sazerac that chased the oyster down with fiery rye whiskey. “That was… Merlin’s knickers, that was unpleasant.”

“Try it with the cracker,” Pip grinned, putting together the next oyster. “Maybe you’ll like it better that way.”

“Maybe after another drink. Or two.” She took a sip of her water before accepting her cracker from Pippa. It was going to be a long meal.

  By the time the third young man sloshed neon-colored alcohol out of what appeared to be a goldfish bowl on her dress, Bourbon Street had lost its charms for Pippa. She discretely cast another cleaning spell and steered them away from a pair of young women who were shouting at each other. Hecate was still looking everywhere at once, like a child visiting a candy store for the first time. Pippa gritted her teeth and grinned bigger, marveling at everything that Hecate pointed out.

The breeze shifted, cooler air blowing across Pippa’s skin. She looked up, but it was too dark to see if there were any clouds or not. She looked down in time to see a young man carrying a string bass disappear into a courtyard. “Look, Hiccup!” She pulled Hecate along behind her, “it looks like there may be a band setting up.”

They passed under a gate that read “Musical Legends Park” and it was like stepping into another world. Lush plants surrounded a small courtyard filled with wrought iron bistro tables and life-sized statues of famous musicians. A tiered fountain splashed merrily in the middle of it all. Pippa nudged Hecate into place next to a statue of “Fats” Domino and pulled out her cell phone to take a picture. “Shall we grab a table, Hiccup? They should be starting soon?” She pointed to the tiny stage where a band was indeed setting up. “There’s a table,” she said, lacing her fingers with Hecate’s and pulling her to the empty table nestled in the back. “Café Beignet… what do you say, darling? We haven’t had beignets yet. Shall I go order for us?”

“Oh, I think so. And… a coffee? An iced coffee.” Hecate pulled the two chairs at the table around to the same side so they could see the stage. A red and blue neon sign glowed ‘Steamboat Willie’ behind the band. She watched Pippa swish her way through the tables to the counter. Her stomach fluttered along with the hem of Pippa’s dress.

Pippa was back in no time, coffees and order number in hand. She settled in next to Hecate just as the band started up a jazzy rendition of ‘I Get A Kick Out of You.’  

Halfway through the song, Hecate leaned over and whispered into Pippa’s ear. “I do, you know, get a kick out of you.” Pippa turned, smiling back at her. “I’m so glad you’re here with me, Pipsqueak.” She leaned imperceptibly closer, glancing down as Pippa licked her lips. “I love—”

“Half a dozen beignets?” The scent of sugar flooded over them as the waitress placed a cardboard basket of pastries on the table.

Pippa groaned as she leaned back in her chair, the mood broken. “Thank you!” She mustered up as much enthusiasm as she could, but it wasn’t much.

“Our timing is as good as it ever was,” Hecate said, chuckling. “Why is there so much sugar?”

Pulling the basket closer, Pippa breathed in the aroma of warm sugar. “The real question is why doesn’t everything get this much sugar?” Waggling her eyebrows at Hecate, Pippa took a huge bite of beignet, promptly covering half of her chest in powdered sugar. “Oooh, Hiccup… iss wonnerful!” She spewed even more powdered sugar when she tried to speak.

Hecate nibbled at a corner of hers, keeping her dress immaculate. “It’s lovely.” She quirked an eyebrow in Pippa’s direction. “As are you. Even if you’re coated in sugar.”

“Especially if I’m coated in sugar?”  She bit into her pastry again – slow and sexy. Or would have been if she hadn’t ended up with powdered sugar on the end of her nose.

“Let’s find out.” Before she could lose her nerve, Hecate leaned forward and pressed her lips to Pippa’s, kissing her softly at first, then harder, letting the taste of coffee, sugar and Pippa burn itself into her memory. She broke this kiss when she realized her hands were sliding up Pippa’s thighs. “Yes,” she panted, “especially.”

Pippa roared with laughter, coming back for another quick kiss before laughing again. “Good to know.” She dragged a finger through the powdered sugar and booped Hecate on the nose. “You’re pretty sweet too, darling.” She jerked her chin towards the beignets. “Still think they have too much sugar on top?”

Reaching up, Hecate gently brushed the sugar from Pippa’s face, never breaking eye contact. “I think, Pipsqueak, that I’m ready to have a bit more sweetness in my life.”

[soveryanon]

Reviewing time for MAG135 /o/

- Fun fact! The verb “extinguish” has appeared as a word in all three of the Daedalus statements, in relation to the three different powers involved:

(MAG057, Carter Chilcott) “There’s nothing, nothing but empty, uncaring void lacing dead worlds and dead stars all-together like a tapestry of lonely meaninglessness. Humans have existed for the smallest sliver of a fraction of a moment in the existence of the universe, and we will be extinguished just as quickly. And when we are at last gone forever, into the quiet emptiness of death, there will be nothing left but the cold universe. And nothing shall mark our passing because there is nothing to do so.”

(MAG106, Jan Kilbride) “Most people can’t even properly appreciate the size of our own planet, seeing it only in crudely rendered diagrams or maps; but compared to us… the planet is immense. More than large enough for the swell of humanity to grow and… ultimately extinguish itself. [SCOFF] Yet compared to the wider universe… it isn’t even a noticeable speck.”

(MAG135) ELIAS: I don’t know the details. Ny-Ålesund is a stronghold of The Dark, meaning I can’t see inside. I… believe they call it “The Extinguished Sun”, though that’s as much as I know.

- I love how The Dark still feels like… that one fear which should be super stereotypical (Cult Of Darkness.) and yet always manages to get under your skin anyway, and is that one thing that we’re apparently never managing to get rid of. Julia and Trevor butchered Darvish in Summer 2010? No problem. Things happened in March-to-May 2015 at the Hither Green Dissenters Chapel, apparently derailing or temporarily neutralising The Dark’s activities? Ahaha, we’ll manage. Maxwell Rayner was killed by Section 31 officers on Elias’s Personal Tip in February 2017? IT’S FINE. WE CAN STILL DO SOMETHING. I had Questions about how The Dark was connected with Gertrude’s death, I’m delighted that we’ll be digging into their activities again, since Jon isn’t sure what happened – isn’t even sure whether Gertrude had managed to neutralise them! I wonder if the matter of March/May 2015 as the date of Gertrude’s death will be explained, or if I should finally put that to rest as a simple mistake.

… Interestingly, following the pattern of solar eclipses: the total solar eclipse over Ny-Ålesund that Basira had pinned down actually took place on 20th March 2015, which is… neither when Mark Bilham went into the Hither Green Dissenters Chapel (March 11th), neither when Gertrude officially died (March 15th or May 15th), but is around the time she should have died according to Oliver’s dreams. In real life, the next solar eclipse (partial) in Ny-Ålesund happened on August 11th 2018, so that could be the planned date for the upcoming half-baked new ritual attempt indeed… but the date is a bit weird for the overall pacing of season 4. We’re in… beginning of April? 2018, and usually getting a statement a week (more or less). So that doesn’t easily coincide with a midseason finale, nor with the season finale? Unless Team Archive hurries to get to Svalbard very soon, in the hope of neutralising The Dark before August 2018. (Funny bit: there was a partial solar eclipse in South America on February 15th 2018… the day Oliver visited Jon and he woke up from his “coma”.)

I have no idea: there are so many things to keep track of, currently (Peter’s own plans? The Extinction’s threat? Elias’s intentions regarding The Watcher’s Crown? The Web’s schemes and intentions for Jon? Now, The Dark’s activities?) – I… do like that it indeed gives us a feeling that, outside of pure narrative… all the Fears have their own agenda, they’re not just queuing up for the Archives team to take care of them? They’re not dependant on them, they carry on Doing Their Things and bringing their own terrors? And it’s… very bittersweet to think that it will probably always be like this.

- I’m so mad about the fact that Manuela’s story makes… so much sense with how Jan had described her:

(MAG106, Jan Kilbride) “Manuela Dominguez was quite a big name in certain areas of the physics community. Or at least she had been; I hadn’t heard of any work she’d done for a good few years and, as I said I’m more on the engineering side of things so… it wasn’t really something I kept up with in detail. While she was happy to talk, Manuela apparently didn’t like to discuss her professional life on Earth, or the specifics of the research she was doing on the Daedalus. Like Chilcott, her research was kept entirely separate from mine, and while we spent plenty of time together, I never did figure out exactly what it was. Something to do with lasers, I think.”

I never ever thought for one second that it might have been “it’s because she’s part of the cult, Cass, and has been for the past years” aND YET IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE AND SEEMS SO OBVIOUS IN RETROSPECT… I’m so mad, I love this series and it keeps making me feel like a Fool. (But with love. Cackling at my face, but with love.) Another thing that gets a bit… “funny” in retrospect:

(MAG106, Jan Kilbride) “It was the sense of a presence, of there being something out there… something that wasn’t the Earth, and it was getting closer… When it started, I tried to talk to Manuela about it, but she seemed to think I was talking about aliens and quickly changed the subject. […] And that cry came again; so loud, and long, and deep that I couldn’t not be the sound of a living thing – so vast and so ancient that thinking about it made me weep. And I screamed in turn. My hands touched the rail at the exact moment that Manuela came to check on me. I was moving again. She asked if I was alright, though she… clearly had no interest in the answer. She said she’d felt the station shake, bu–ut when I pressed, she… claimed she hadn’t heard anything. Her eyes were red and I noticed for the first time that the tips of her fingers were burned. I… don’t know why I asked her, really. I knew then that she hadn’t heard it – that she would never hear it. And I felt completely alone. I remember I almost envied Chilcott, because at least he had known what he was signing up for.”

…………………… She probably assumed that Jan had heard her “battery” screaming, uh, hence the quick denial.

- WHY DO WE KEEP GETTING OPPORTUNITIES TO GET SAD ABOUT JAN KILBRIDE??? There was already something very… sensitive and heart-wrenching in his statement from MAG106, in his thought and overall tone (I’m apparently very weak to characters pulling the ~I would have liked to still be able to think that ignorance meant safety~ shtick ;;), even more with Melanie’s narration – she was absolutely perfect for that one, with her voice slightly cracking and the overall impression of throat tightening… And I was already sad for him with that statement alone! Even sadder when thinking he was probably the man with beautiful eyes seen with Gertrude during The Buried’s ritual! And season 4 keeps making me sad about him, godsdamnit, first with Jon mentioning how he ended, and now with:

(MAG135, Manuela Dominguez) “Either way, it was clear my two fellow astronauts were patsies, sent up there to suffer. I almost felt bad for them, but it was in most ways a relief to know I wouldn’t need to worry about them interfering with my own project. […] the closest I ever came to discovery was when Kilbride expressed confusion at the rate that our supplies were diminishing. It was really only the two of us anyway, with Chilcott sealed away, having his own little breakdown. And Jan was always a bit of an idiot, so ready to believe anyone’s lies… But I suppose I don’t need to tell you that – do I, Gertrude?”

(The insidiousness was creepy, sure, but come on, Dark people, we’re so used to Voyeurs all the time, you spilling that You Know What Gertrude Did With Jan doesn’t feel mind-blowingly threatening compared to the others <3)

I wonder if we’ll hear again about the Daedalus. Melanie had noticed that Jan’s statement felt like it ended abruptly (presumably, Gertrude was told he was here and interrupted him to have a chat?) – so there could be another half lying around, or a live-statement with Gertrude, or… I don’t know. But now that we know that there was a 4th person on the station (WHICH WAS A “HOLY ARCEUS�� MOMENT), and given that Manuela mentioned that she wasn’t sure of the Lukases&the Fairchilds’ own motives + that… the person who had taken care of the calculation must have been aware of the extra body, but she didn’t say it was Rayner’s team taking care of that aspect, it still feels like there might have been another story against the Currently Official Story (once again):

(MAG135, Manuela Dominguez) “I don’t know how he convinced Fairchild and the Lukases to help finance the project – a life as long as his is evidently very good for one’s finances, but even so, space exploration is a whole other magnitude of expenditure. I don’t entirely know if they were working on rituals of their own, or simply pushing the boundaries of their own fears, their masters. […] Exactly how the launch was arranged, I couldn’t tell you, but I assume the calculations must have been done by one of ours. Otherwise, well… weight is very important when planning a launch, and it could hardly have escaped their notice that there were four people in that rocket.”

I’m very appreciative of the way the Daedalus had been handled in the canon, slowly taking “shape”. We first had Carter Chilcott’s testimony, who… couldn’t tell us a lot about the life aboard, except for his own experience, since he was precisely isolated; we then had Jan, who was more in control but still unaware of what was at work there; and now, we’re getting Manuela, who turned out to have been totally aware of the aim of the mission. This could be the end of the story, or there could be yet more to put things into perspective (ha), we’ll see!

- I don’t know which shade of queer Manuela was/is but: definitely queer (“Anything they did not understand became unnatural and I found myself crossing that line from an early age. Although strangely, out of everything I was, it was always my desire to pursue a scientific career that they railed against with the most energy.”). AND SO AWFUL HOLY HECK… I’m glad that Daisy wasn’t in the room with Jon because his tone was so into it that… he might have freaked her out a bit? It was terrifying, so… deceptively sweet while digging the knife deep into your flesh…

- One thing that gets me a lot (in a “HHHHHhhHHHH” way) is when… avatars talk about their patrons? The reverence, the worship in their words? And Manuela was especially “HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” is that regard: yes, absolutely terrible, and did you hear that drive and that passion? (It’s hot/aesthetically pleasing, is what I want to say.)

I still have… the impression, in a way, that the Daedalus never actually happened in the TMA universe; Melanie had mentioned that feeling in MAG106, though she pointed out the existence of pictures of the crew’s return to Earth, but somehow… I can’t help but feel like indeed, it was too out of our realm to truly have happened, and that it was all staged by another entity/by the Lukases&the Fairchilds, to pretend it had happened when actually the staff had stayed on Earth all along, and that they organised the press releases about it? But it’s also awfully fitting that yes, Fears experiments sound so impossible that it can’t have been happening. If there is no twist, it seems like avatars are drawing powers from their patrons proportionally to the faith they have in them?

(MAG135, Manuela Dominguez) “Scientifically, it was nonsense of course. Dark energy and the like don’t work like that, not even remotely. But that wasn’t important. What mattered was that it felt like science, and that was all I needed. To do my work, to create the Black Star would need a parody, an aping mockery of science. But it would also need the deepest of darknesses. When I told Maxwell what I actually needed, he told me such a thing was impossible, but I insisted. And so he began his work on the Daedalus.

[…] My experiments continued largely uninterrupted, pushing the boundaries of light, darkness and fear. It was dangerous work and more than once, I got too close to the light and it almost destroyed me. But it didn’t. I could regale you with the technical terms or scientific disciplines I played with and rendered meaningless, but in the end all you actually need to know is that I succeeded. A tiny, terrible sun of the pitchest black, shining beautiful Darkness all around it.”

Like a twisted “believe in fairies” – things getting the power you give them, similarly to symbols? Sarah had, back in the days, said the Trophy Room Taxidermy Shop got its powers from people’s interactions with it (MAG096: “What is the significance of this place?” “Nothing, except what people give it. But they give it a lot, make it a place of power for us.”)

If the experiment did indeed happen in space: there had been hypotheses that the “falling satellite debris” which killed Oliver had been the Daedalus, and I had dismissed it because the dates didn’t match at all… but I’m a stupid potato and: of course the crew returned to Earth through a shuttle, and this was explicitly stated by Manuela. So it could still have been the Daedalus going full-on Icarus.

… But on the other hand: while the name “Daedalus” finally takes a bit more meaning with this episode (the story about ~getting too close to the sun~), Daedalus was actually the prudent one, who remained wary of the sun and was clever enough to always escape the murder attempts. Icarus went too close to the sun (and drowned in the sea, leaving Daedalus alone). Daedalus… gave his name to the maze, and brings corridors to minds. (But the “Daedalus project” was an actual, historical one, which never got completed in our world… Rah, I don’t know! The fact that we learned that Manuela had actually been full-on avatar in the space station, and not an innocent scientist victim of The Dark, makes me paranoid about another… twist regarding the station x’))

We’ve had another reference to Icarus in the canon, though: “George Icarus” was the name under which Leitner was buried, as Tim discovered in MAG114. Paid by the Institute. It fits Leitner very well but… given the ties between “Daedalus” and “Icarus”, it feels like a very weird coincidence – so did you get involved in the space project in one way or another, Elias… *squints*)

- Regarding the 4th person on the Daedalus, I’ve been grabbing my face a lot and screaming in silence about the sheer HORROR of suddenly learning that… there was someone else aboard, with Manuela very casually dehumanizing him at every possible turn (“one unlucky nyctophobe”, “I never learned his name, never needed to; he was simply a battery”, “The final experiment had left my battery in such a state that no amount of sound-proofing could dampen the screams, and I was glad of the peace and quiet.”). I wonder if it’s someone we’ve already seen mentioned somewhere…? The only potential one (in my mind) would be Peter “Pete” Gordo, who worked at the Wakefield Prison in MAG052 – Exceptional Risk, and had touched the Dark creature when it came to butcher Robert Montauk. Both the (awful) statement-giver and Jon had highlighted that he had vanished shortly after, in 2002, so he was probably a “half-finished meal” too…

Since Manuela… didn’t mention killing him but implied that she had left him behind (alone) in the station when she went back to Earth with the other two, I wonder if he might have turned into Something Else, or if he plainly died of exhaustion / lack of oxygen / starvation / Fear (alone, in the dark empty infinite space). Conceptually, it could be a good tie-in if he had somehow become an avatar of Extinction, but I don’t know how that could fit with his primal fear and what happened to him. One thing I have in mind, though: Daedalus was the inventor who helped Pasiphae copulate with the bull, in the myth, and the Minotaur wouldn’t have been conceived without it. So… Daedalus contributed to Creating The Monster (before working to contain it). Not sure it could be relevant, but just in case… there is that.

(- Extra-funny thing about Icarus/Daedalus……………… remember how Peter had called Jon in MAG134? A “bull-headed Archivist”. Congrats, Jon! It might have been involuntary (IS IT.) but you’re officially the Monster In The Labyrinth, right now, according to the Lonely creepy boat captain.)

(And again: considering that it turned out Martin was the one who gave Jon the connection to the outside that helped pull him out of the coffin, does that make Martin an Ariadne.)

- So, we got a new name for a ritual (The Dark is ~The Extinguished Sun~) but we also got the notion of a “stronghold” mentioned by Elias:

(MAG135) ELIAS: I don’t know the details. Ny-Ålesund is a stronghold of The Dark, meaning I can’t see inside.

=> Breekon had described the Institute as “The Eye’s Pedestal” (MAG128, “That was the first time we saw what would become this place, The Eye’s Pedestal.”), too. The question is still pending for Point Nemo (a Vast one? An End one?) and Hill Top Road (neutral ground or Web? Desolation? Spiral?). For the Lonely, Carter Chilcott had very specific dreams reminiscent of the graveyard from Naomi’s statement and of the Tundra’s journeys:

(MAG057, Carter Chilcott) “The hallucination stopped. I did not even get the comfort of company in my delusions, though at some point, the line between dreaming and reality seemed to blur. I’d be sleeping, strapped into my bed in the middle of the void, or at the same time floating through ancient graveyards or the open, empty sea. They weren’t hallucinations though, they were dreams – even if the cold seem to seep out of them, and into the bones of me.”

And there were the places where ritual attempts took place – the Wax Museum for The Stranger (though the Taxidermy Shop was also “a place of power” for them), that Elias claimed to be unable to access (and Jon did feel weird with no conception of time there); the town of Bucoda, for The Buried; Sannikov Land, for The Spiral; the Gnostic church near Istanbul for The Flesh (and potentially the Hither Green Dissenters Chapel for The Dark). Given how these places got… severely destroyed after their rituals got thwarted, it sounds like they were only been temporary places to build up power? Ny-Ålesund and the plain… sea are a bit more permanent than those punctual places, though? (Please, Team Archive, don’t go bombing the whole of Ny-Ålesund.)

- If we’re going to be digging a bit more into Dark-related activities… will we get a confirmation of what the fuck was happening re:Maxwell Rayner? Did he just have a remarkably long lifetime thanks to “feeding” his god, like Simon Fairchild, since we know that he was already around in the XIXth century and Manuela herself made a reference to the fact he had been around for very long (MAG135: “a life as long as his is evidently very good for one’s finances”)? I know the favourite fantheory on this one is that he’d been body-hopping but I’ve never been convinced since we didn’t really have descriptions of him changing, except that he was often Kind Of Old. There… has indeed been a suspicious trend of him targeting or getting a child around him: an unnamed one in 1864 (MAG098, Doctor Algernon Moss: “He is led around by a young Arabian lad of ten or eleven, though the ease with which he carries himself makes me suspect this assistance is an affectation rather than necessity.”); in 1995, Julia was attacked by the creature when she was 12; Basira and the other officers were sent against Rayner after he had kidnapped Callum Brodie, twelve years old, in January 2017 (MAG073, Basira: “Yeah. Callum Brodie. Twelve… twelve years old. Disappeared from his home in Dalston three weeks ago.”) – but it’s not necessarily to get a new body…? I always had the impression that it could plainly be because… well, the fear of the Dark is more prominent in children? So they could perhaps feed Dark-people better?

- I mostly wonder if (/hope that) we will get a bit more information about the relationship between Robert Montauk and Maxwell Rayner, in the process! Because… honestly, except for the fact that Robert’s wife apparently belonged to the People’s Church of the Divine Host (since she had the pendant) and that Robert killed around 40 people between 1990 and 1995 that may or may not have all been related to the cult, there are a loooot of things I’m still uncertain about? And Jon still had Questions about it too:

(MAG052) ARCHIVIST: So what is this thing that seems to have stalked Robert Montauk through so much of his life? And what’s its connection to Rayner? Were they summoning it, containing it, worshipping it? Whatever the case, it seems as though Montauk earned its anger. I feel it might be worthwhile getting a few more torches for the Archive.

(MAG074) ARCHIVIST: Well, that seems to close the book on Maxwell Rayner. Maybe the whole People’s Church of the Divine Host. I can’t help but feel I’ve got the last chapter of a story and I don’t even know the title. At least I hope it’s the last chapter. I still can’t find much about the company Outer Bay Shipping. Looks like a shell corporation, but tracking corporate ownership is not something I’m skilled at.

* Was Julia’s mother a runaway from the cult, or an active participant? It sounded to be the latter since Julia mentioned that she used to have friends who… didn’t inquire on her disappearance (MAG009: “apparently no-one noticed she was gone, which was strange as I have vague memories of her having friends over a lot before she vanished.”) Had she left her pendant to trap Julia too? Did she disappear to protect Julia? Did she willingly get spirited away? Actually, Robert told Julia she was “gone” but since Robert’s last victim had disappeared from his previous life a few years before his murder (MAG009, Archivist: “Christopher Lorne was a member of the church and his family hadn’t heard from him in the six years prior to his murder.”)… could it be possible that Julia’s mother is actually… still alive… and very Invested in the cult…

* Robert apparently did these things in order to protect Julia from… the cult? The creature? Maxwell? Julia did highlight that protecting her was one of his concerns (MAG009: “He whispered to me then, when he thought I was asleep, promised to protect me, to make sure that ‘it wouldn’t get me too’.”), but she didn’t really come out of the story acknowledging that it was what he was trying to achieve, I felt – not even to renounce his methods or success. Even when we got her live-statement in MAG109, she presented his actions as unrelated to her. But what was Robert doing exactly, and why…?

* Julia highlighted that they didn’t get any money problems (MAG009: “it was only after his arrest that I discovered that had been the point he’d resigned his job on the police force. I don’t know where the money came from after that but we always seemed to have enough.”) sooo was Maxwell Rayner paying for Robert’s… services?

* Robert and Rayner apparently hated each other by the time of Robert’s imprisonment, when Rayner visited him in Wakefield Prison in late March 2002, a few months before getting butchered by The Dark’s creature (… or one of them):

(MAG052, Phillip Brown) “It was an older guy, I’d guess late 50s, wearing a well-tailored black suit and an expression of disgust. When I brought Montauk in, his face fell, and he went very pale. I’d helped folks beat Robert Montauk a dozen times or more, but I had never seen him look scared. He sat down opposite the old man, and they looked each other in the eye through the thick glass. I think the visitor might have been blind. His eyes were cloudy, but he had no cane or dog. And it didn’t seem to affect how he looked at Montauk. Neither of them spoke. The seconds turned into minutes and still they didn’t say a word. They just sat there staring. Given where I work, it’s really something to be able to say that I’ve never seen two people who hated each other as much as Robert Montauk and that old man.

[…] I was tense, ready to fight off Montauk if he decided to make a move, but instead, a soft voice came from out of the darkness. I didn’t recognise it, but I thought it sounded like it came from the old man, and I don’t think he was talking to me. [STATIC:] “You didn’t think you could kill it for long, did you?” [/STATIC] That’s what it said. Then Pete got the door open, and a shaft of light poured in from the corridor. I could once again see Montauk and the old man sat there, motionless. It didn’t seem like they’d moved an inch, though as I went to take Montauk back to his cell, I noticed that he was crying.”

But before that, Rayner had apparently sent Robert after his next targets (MAG009, Julia: “He asked me to tell my father that it was Detective Rayner on the line with a new case for him.”), so? Unless the last one was someone that Robert went after without Rayner’s approval? Christopher Lorne, Robert’s last victim, was the only identified one, and was confirmed to have belonged to the People’s Church of the Divine Host. Was he an exception, or were all the previous victims from the cult too? In that case, why the heck was Maxwell Rayner getting them killed…? Or were they typical sacrifices in the cult? What happened, for Rayner to have come to loathe Robert, although he previous appeared to be giving him instructions…?

* Unless… was the man who phoned the Montauk’s house and pretended to be “officer Rayner” actually Maxwell Rayner, or someone making fun of him? Julia mentioned that the voice was old (fitting Rayner, forever a bit old) but… that it had an accent (MAG009: “It was a breathy voice, like that of an old man, and at the time I decided he had a German accent, though, when I was young a lot of different nationalities and accents were lumped together in my mind under the label ‘German’.”). If we know one thing from Maxwell Rayner’s voice, at least during the XIXth century, it’s precisely… that it just sounded unremarkable in English (MAG098: “Both speak perfect English, with no accent I can recognise”) – though the statement also dealt with German folklore and Rayner Knew about it, so who knows. Same person, different perceptions? Body-hopping after all? “Maxwell Rayner” being a mantle and a role more than the same person/soul?

- tl;dr Given how The Dark has been a huge part of Julia’s story and there is still room for Questions regarding Robert Montauk… if the Archival staff is planning to go after the remnant of the cult, I really hope that it will be Julia’s cue to come back… Although it has been stated that she couldn’t handle the idea of travelling by boat for very long.

- Re: Manuela’s DRIVE, how fitting that this was also an episode in which Elias casually mentioned his own ~patron~ (I’m really glad that Peter and Elias are now using that word too! It had, so far, mostly been used by other people to refer to avatars’ gods, not avatars themselves presenting their gods this way). Elias rarely mentions The Eye unprompted, and there was something interesting in the way the plural “you” from Manuela’s statement, referring to Gertrude and Elias, became that implied “we” from Elias, referring to him and… Jon, nowadays.

(MAG135) ELIAS: Fine. Consider it a test – things are… coming, things that will need Jon to be far stronger and more willing to use his connection to our patron.

Not the first time Elias amalgamated Jon and himself in the same ~we~ (MAG092: “It doesn’t please your master?” “Our master, Jon.”) but it was especially noticeable since Manuela had totally reduced the relevant Eye agents to the Archivist and the Head of the Institute, too. I don’t know how to explain that but… I felt like there was a bit of an echo, between the fact that Manuela had her own “we” (“even with the loss of Darvish, we will still be victorious”) with clearly identified, more powerful figures (Maxwell, Darvish, Manuela herself), and the… Eye people. There is mostly Elias and Jon, they’re the ones with powers, and as Manuela is describing The Dark’s ritual coming closer at the time of her statement, I feel like the shadow of the Watcher’s Crown is silently looming in a corner?

- As usual: e v e r y t h i n g about Elias. It’s been twice in a row now that Peter appears in an episode only for Elias to do the same in the very next episode and it feels like a competition between the Two Bastards to claim the Throne. Or a friendly competition between Alasdair Stuart and Ben Meredith to see who will manage to make people laughscream the most.

Anyway, non-exhaustive bullet list of Elias being… Elias:

* Do you think he will manage to give ONE GOOD PERFORMANCE REVIEW ONE DAY. I mean, how did he handle Melanie, who worked the hardest of all the assistants in the beginning of season 3, who read the most statements after Martin, who was given work by Jon, and all despite the lack of Archival training&direction (as she called Elias out on)?

(MAG106) ELIAS: And… how are you finding it? MELANIE: Is that a joke? ELIAS: Aside from the obvious, I mean. MELANIE: Oh well, I… I suppose it’s been… unstructured. Without Jon around, and with you being sat up here lurking, there’s not been a lot of useful direction. ELIAS: I see. MELANIE: I mean, you pick out a statement occasionally, and Jon might phone in to ask after some… scrap of information, but to be honest, no one’s even really told me what an “archival assistant” is actually supposed to do.

[A FEW EVIL SPEECHES AND PSYCHOLOGICAL TORTURE SESSIONS LATER]

MELANIE: [BROKEN SOBS] ELIAS: Anyway. Aside from all of that, I’d say your performance has been… satisfactory.

Meanwhile, Jon, who managed to snap out of the chaos that was The Unknowing, saw through Nikola, managed to compel Tim back to awareness enough for Tim to use the detonator…

(MAG135) ELIAS: Consider it a test – things are… coming, things that will need Jon to be far stronger and more willing to use his connection to our patron. His performance during The Unknowing was… disappointing.

… was “disappointing”. THAT’S NOT WHAT YOU SAID IN MAG120, THOUGH, YOU JERK:

(MAG120) ELIAS: You’re doing well, Jon. I only hope you can continue your growth without my guidance.

Insert the “My job here is done.” “But you didn’t do anything…?” meme here.

Elias, just face it: you’re a shit boss, a shit manager, a shit leader, absolutely terrible when it comes to actually giving direction, they’re not responsible for this!! :w

* Well, at the same time, calm your Jon!boner Elias:

(MAG135) BASIRA: Then you messed up. Way he tells it, he doesn’t know how he got out of there. ELIAS: But he did. And his powers were no small part of it. Even if he required some assistance, they were what saved him. And he’s still achieved what no one – mortal, monster, or anything in-between – has ever been able to. He climbed out of The Buried. […] If Gertrude had a plan for this one, I haven’t found it, which is why Jon needs to be closer to The Eye. If anyone can stop what’s happening, he can. See through the darkness, etcetera.

I had wondered whether Jon wasn’t beginning to get a biiit more powerful than was to Elias’s taste (since he mentioned to Basira that he has given instructions to prevent Jon from visiting him if Jon was inclined to it in MAG127, and Jon demonstrated in MAG128 how he’s now able to… extract statements from unwilling subjects, plus the overall droplets of knowledge), but it sounds like it’s actually going according to plan. Elias had already mentioned that Jon was… supposed to grow his own powers and be the one to take care of The Unknowing, back in MAG102, but here, Elias came across as especially powerless compared to Jon (“I don’t know the details. Ny-Ålesund is a stronghold of The Dark, meaning I can’t see inside.”) and… not even trying to pretend anymore that He Has An Important Role On His Own. Jon is the Archivist, we knooow, we’ve been told, but what is Elias’s function in this mess, then…?

* I’m not sure that there is anything more behind the “detective” title he’s giving to Basira since, as mentioned another time… it was something Georgie initially used (MAG122: “You’re the detective.”) and Elias uses it precisely because Basira pointed out that it wasn’t her title?

(MAG135) ELIAS: Nice to see you again, detective. BASIRA: Still not a detective. Never was. ELIAS: Oh, but everyone else seems to be getting a title these days, why shouldn’t you– BASIRA: [SLAMS HANDS ON THE TABLE] Cut the shit! […] ELIAS: I rather feel the real shame would be letting the entire world fall into Darkness because of a single person’s wounded pride. Detective. The stakes are far too high for that kind of… indulgence. […] ELIAS: Good luck. Detective.

It sounds mostly, to me, like a cat staring you RIGHT IN THE EYES while slowly pushing your favourite mug off the table? Doing it just to piss her off? Elias never used “Archivist” with Jon either (except in statement-mode in MAG120, but he went back to “Jon” when addressing him directly through the tape right after the static had faded), so I’m not sure there is particular… substance to it. On the one hand, it would sound like the perfect title for a Hunter-Beholding activity (tailing someone or something and learning about their privacy, potentially cumulating both fears of being hunted and exposed). On the other hand, I can’t help but feel like it could be another jab at Martin, who had mentioned his own lack of special pet name:

(MAG092) ELIAS: You think you’re the only police officer eager to do violence and call it justice? No, there are plenty of other rabid dogs out there, mad with the Hunt.

(MAG116) ELIAS: Oh, and, Jon, technically, I can’t stop you, but I would heavily advise against bringing any… rogue… elements. MARTIN: You can just say Tim.

(MAG118) MARTIN: Oh. That’s it, isn’t it! Martin’s just acting out! I mean, Daisy’s a rabid dog, and Melanie’s a potential killer; Tim’s a… a, a rogue element, but Martin? Oh, Martin’s just, just acting out! He’ll have a cry, and a lie-down, and feel much better!

(And once again: Elias did mention that Jon had received ~assistance~ to get out of the coffin… but managed to not name Martin directly, pfftttr.)

* Even more rattling chain sounds every time Elias opens his mouth => he’s using his hands a l o t when talking, uh. Gesturing person. VERY dramatic person. Is it a prerequisite for working at the Institute, was that the reason Elias chose Jon as the next Archivist.

* Oooh, Elias.

(MAG135) BASIRA: [SLAMS HANDS ON THE TABLE] Cut the shit! What are you playing at? ELIAS: I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.

When you’re playing at too many things at the same time that you can honestly not answer that question.

* Overall: I LIVE FOR ALL THE ELIAS-BASIRA EXCHANGES THIS SEASON… In season 1 and 2, they probably would have had very civil and cordial discussions but… beginning season 3, yes, Elias had begun to Let It Out way more (was it costing him that much to hold off and to appear proper and respectable? … or did the role just become Free Ben Estate.) and it’s even worse now. He’s so bratty and petty, and Basira had always been so straight-to-the-point and no-bullshit (except when it comes to office gossip) that it’s delightful and feels like she has to handle a spoiled brat while not being paid enough for this.

(MAG135) BASIRA: If you’re lying about this– ELIAS: You’ll kill me? [HUFF] I can hardly wait. [STEPS DEPARTING]

eLIAS, THAT’S LOW (the thing about kill-me-and-you’re-all-dying still stands, that’s precisely why they chose to get him arrested) AND YOU HAVE NO PRIDE YOURSELF.

* Though I am also very mad that Elias confirmed that His Plan regarding Basira’s investigations… was to get her out, because she’s Jon’s impulse-control.

(MAG135) ELIAS: Would you simply believe I wanted you and Daisy reunited? BASIRA: No. ELIAS: Fine.

I LOVE BASIRA SO M U C H…

Elias… called Basira out on her “pride” (“I rather feel the real shame would be letting the entire world fall into Darkness because of a single person’s wounded pride. Detective.”), and I’m worried that he might be spot-on on this one, like he was with Melanie and Tim. Though he’s currently nurturing Basira’s frustrations – sending her all over the globe before basically admitting that she couldn’t have done anything relevant herself? Now talking her down? Insisting that Jon is their best chance, apparently not taking her into consideration at all except as a potential messenger? Offering an “idea” that turned out to have been manipulation, and now giving new instructions while highlighting that she’s in no position to refuse? Either he’s still awfully bad when it comes to hurting people and not expecting them to get back at you, either he’s Compensating Hard for the prison time, either he’s trying to foster harsh reactions from Basira (and it won’t help her to warm up to Jon if Elias keeps presenting Jon as their most reliable chance ;;).

- I am HYSTERICAL over the fact that we’re finally getting another bit of something related to Elias’s backstory and that it’s that he was apparently acquainted with MAXWELL RAYNER:

(MAG135, Manuela Dominguez) “I come to you with a warning. And an offer. When you read this, I would consider it a great favour if you could share my words with the Head of your Institute. Tell him that Maxwell Rayner sends his regards and offers… sanctuary. A time of holy Darkness is at hand, when The Eye will close forever, and in the spirit of the friendship they once shared, he offers an opportunity – to surrender. Forsake the Ceaseless Watcher; abandon your position, and you shall be spared in the Blind World to come. In the spirit of reconciliation, and to convince you of our sincerity… I offer my story. Much as it may pain me to feed the sick voyeur that lurks in this place.

[…] That’s all I really came here to say! To let you know we had succeeded. And to make your boss an offer on behalf of Maxwell. […] So by all means, do your worst. Or prostrate yourself, both of you, before the Forever Blind – and perhaps you might be spared. Maxwell and I await your decision, with keen interest.”

ELIAS……………………

And nothing says more than “(ex)friendship” than confirming that you gave a tip to Section 31 to ensure they would go after and get rid of your old ~~friend~~, uh:

(MAG073) ARCHIVIST: […] Oddly enough, all I can think about is how did the police know where Rayner was keeping the boy? Basira didn’t seem to know, and the Church clearly wasn’t expecting the police to arrive. With a few exceptions, Rayner managed to stay off the grid for two decades. How did they find him now? Someone must have known what was happening and tipped them off. And I don’t think it was anyone inside that building.

(MAG135) ELIAS: You thought the final death of Maxwell Rayner might have sufficiently derailed them? Yes, that was my hope too, but alas it would seem not. BASIRA: Maxwell… You… You called in that tip, sent us out to their warehouse. ELIAS: And now I’m sending you out again.

(I’m so glad that it was confirmed!)

Until now, almost everything we had about Elias’s… life outside of the Institute was the Infamous Bits about His Official Backstory (which directly contradicted the small mention from MAG029 that he was a filing clerk at the Institute in 1972 – or at least, highlighted that uhoh, something doesn’t match here and that’s a twenty-years difference, the staff should have noticed):

(MAG049) ARCHIVIST: Supplemental. Elias Bouchard is a difficult man to pin down, certainly since he became head of the Institute in 1996 […]. It was a remarkably fast climb to the top, as from what I can find, it looks like he only joined the Institute five years before, in 1991, working in the Artefact Storage. […] And yet, everything I found out about his life before the Institute seems… an ill fit with the austere man I know. He apparently graduated with a Third from Christ Church’s College in PPE, and I found an old gossip column in the student newspaper that – sure well – that mentioned him. If I’m not reading too much into it, the implication seems to be that he was… something of a… pothead [CHUCKLES]. Was he… like that when he first came to work here…?

If this information is accurate: the time of Elias’s studies and his starting at the Institute would match the time-period during which the People’s Church of the Divine Host were officially active (MAG009: “a small cult that grew around the defrocked Pentecostal minister Maxwell Rayner in London during the late eighties and early nineties. […] Mr. Rayner himself disappeared from public view sometime in 1994 and the group fragmented shortly afterwards.”). How the heck did Elias apparently meet him, though? And mostly: … how could Rayner even have The Audacity to offer for them to just… resign? Manuela mentioned that she supposed “there is also an element of provocation here as well” and YOU DON’T SAY…

Wild hypotheses about the Rayner-Elias relationship, not in any particular order of Seriousness:

* Since Manuela only referred to “the Head of the Institute”, without naming Elias, and she referred to the fact that Rayner had been around for very long (we have a statement mentioning him from 1864): it’s an Old Thing, whether or not “Elias” is actually Jonah Magnus. (At the same time… given The Show that Elias is currently putting on, he really doesn’t read to me as being potentially 200+y old? He sounds way too immature and petty and frustrated to be this old?)

* Okay, so amongst the Eye-folks, there seems to be a trend of “x all the Entities”. Gertrude: thwarting all the Entities’ rituals. Jon: getting whumped by all the Entities and having scars to Show. Martin, man of 16 Fears: being courted by all the Entities. Elias: bedding all the Entities??

* Elias was a member of the cult during his Wild Days, before swinging another way when it began to crumble and/or before getting a Revelation at the Institute?

- … It’s also possible that the things about “friendship” were actually awfully sarcastic and cruel in their own ways. We have had the example of Mike Crew who was pursued by an entity and managed to escape it by giving himself fully to another, it… could have been something like that with Elias, too? Escaping the Dark by throwing himself into Beholding?

One thing I find striking is that, quite often, when we learned about the Spooky backstory of people who are currently tied to the Institute, Beholding wasn’t exactly the main Fear that they had encountered – mostly, they witnessed someone around them getting taken by a Fear, and were spectators who didn’t try (or manage) to stop it and… pressed on to know what was happening:

(MAG081) ARCHIVIST: And of course, in my heart, I knew that no-one else could have possibly seen anything as horrible as I had. Well, maybe I could have named one person, but… I watched him disappear forever. […] I had no idea what was going on, not really, but I was somehow desperate to get that book back. He was much bigger than me, though, so all I could do was follow as he walked down alleys and side streets. […] A strange conviction that, if I had been able to face that thing myself, maybe I could have saved him. Stopped it. Ridiculous, of course, I was eight.

(MAG101) MICHAEL: When he was in school, [Michael Shelley] lost a friend to something like me. His friend was named Ryan, but those in power simply called him schizophrenic. I don’t know if he was, but it doesn’t matter. He was so dreadfully afraid his world wasn’t real that to make it so was almost nothing. Michael was there when he was taken; he never got over what he saw. Or didn’t see. After much searching and despair, it drove him into the waiting arms of the Institute, where he met Gertrude Robinson.

(MAG104) TIM: I always tell myself there was some force there. Something that held me in place and meant that all I could do was watch. But sometimes when I think back, I remember how my legs shook, and maybe I could move. … Maybe I’m just a coward.

(Tim was literally a SPECTATOR in a theatre… Plus, add Basira who witnessed one colleague be taken by Diego Molina during her first Section 31’d case, and another colleague get killed by Natalie Ennis; Daisy who saw her colleague be taken by the coffin during her first Section 31’d case; Melanie… who didn’t lose anyone close to her in the process but still witnessed the strange things happening to “Sarah”, and a ghost getting butchered in the train.)

Survivor’s bias, but still noticeable – does Beholding put a claim on almost everyone who survived a Spooky encounter, maybe?

So I don’t know, really, but somethingsomething could the Dark actually have been the experience that originally pushed Elias towards the Institute…? (Jon had assumed, and seemed to have been validated in that regard, that Elias had trouble Watching in the tunnels, which are notoriously very dark. Perhaps the best way to insure Elias would shut the heck up would be to… plainly put a blindfold on him, and he would turn catatonic.)

- Meanwhile: Peter was mentioned for the first time in MAG033, appeared for the first time in episode MAG100. He has had a speaking presence in five episodes since then. He has been an absolute chatterbox when it comes to Elias – there has been no episode in which he didn’t mention him. Elias has been around since MAG017, has had a speaking presence in… eight? episodes since Peter appeared. And still. Has made. No mention. Whatsoever. Of. Any. “Peter Lukas”. Elias………………

(- Assuming that they do know each other, given that Elias said that:

(MAG135) ELIAS: Have you ever seen the Aurora borealis? It’s lovely this time of year. It would be a shame to lose them.

… Did he see them while on The Tundra? Romantikku.)

- Elias managed to not even mention Martin when describing that Jon had ~received help~ to get out of the coffin, and I want to believe that he’s still bitter about his arrest. Though… I really got the feeling, with MAG134 and how Martin described it, that it was The Web and… interestingly, Elias didn’t seem as wary of what happened as Peter.

(MAG135) BASIRA: Then you messed up. Way he tells it, he doesn’t know how he got out of there. ELIAS: But he did. And his powers were no small part of it. Even if he required some assistance, they were what saved him. And he’s still achieved what no one – mortal, monster, or anything in-between – has ever been able to. He climbed out of The Buried.

So either it was actually Beholding guiding Martin there, either it gives some credentials to the idea that Elias had been collaborating or tolerating The Web at the Institute for a long while? There is also that strange connection between Jon and Martin: the fact that Martin just knew that Jon was alive (MAG088, Martin: “It’s the not knowing, you know? I mean, Jon’s still alive. Not sure why, but I’m sure of that. But Sasha, I…”) + the “DIG” from the same episode’s statement, read by Martin, creeping into Jon’s dreams (MAG120). So still no certainties about it but… there is something.

- I… am… very… wary… of the way Elias is OH SO VERY CONVENIENTLY pushing in the direction of Jon’s own uncertainty.

(MAG135) ARCHIVIST: I mean, the Sun’s still there so I assume they failed. Unless they’re still… waiting to attempt it. That’s not the sort of statement you give… four years before you try to actually… ! … Or is it… The timeframes on these, er, “attempts”, the–these rituals, well… they seem variable, to say the least. When I try to think about it, uh– […] [SIGH] I’ll keep digging. If there is another ritual upcoming, I’ll need all the information I can get on it. I can’t believe Gertrude didn’t have a plan for it. I hope I’m just being over-cautious, that it’s already long since dealt with, but… we’ll see. […] I can’t afford to be just living one day at a time, I need… a plan. But I don’t even know what I’m trying to achieve… And no one… no one wants to tell me. Hm. [SIGH] End recording.

(MAG135) ELIAS: I have been observing a recent increase in people and supplies being moved to the small town of Ny-Ålesund, in Svalbard. An increase which I believe may be linked to a rather desperate attempt, by the People’s Church of the Divine Host, to perform a crude ritual of their own. To bring their… “Mr. Pitch”… into the world. […] I don’t know the details. Ny-Ålesund is a stronghold of The Dark, meaning I can’t see inside. I… believe they call it “The Extinguished Sun”, though that’s as much as I know. If Gertrude had a plan for this one, I haven’t found it, which is why Jon needs to be closer to The Eye. If anyone can stop what’s happening, he can. See through the darkness, etcetera. […] Feel free to do your own research to confirm what I’m telling you. Just don’t take too long.

It… it sounds way too much like throwing Jon a bone to ensure that he will get a Dark scar/experience, since Jon had been unable to Know whether Gertrude had managed to stop them or not. It doesn’t feel like Elias is taking this threat too seriously (compare it to the way he had handled The Unknowing?!), but more that he’s pretty confident that they won’t manage anyway and that he can… totally afford to be totally shitty about it since, anyway, he knows that Jon and the others will get worried and will get invested because they can’t afford to risk allowing another ritual to succeed? I find it hard to believe that The Dark is currently any threat but I totally understand that just in case, yes, the Archive Team would feel like they must intervene.

… and with The Lonely (and The Extinction), the only physical scars/marks that Jon is still missing? Are from The Dark. He’s never experienced it directly either and… catapulting him over to Svalbard sounds like the IDEAL opportunity for it, uh. Elias didn’t explicitly say that stopping The Dark was why he needed Jon to get stronger – there were two separate things, he implied causality but… didn’t explicitly say that it was the case so. Suspicious. Of course he would need Jon stronger for The Eye’s ritual, ultimately, after all…?

… But another thing that makes me flip out? IS THAT ELIAS IS NOW FACTORING IN THAT JON CARES FOR THE EXTENDED ARCHIVE TEAM:

(MAG092) ELIAS: You may believe yourself to have friends, to have confidantes, but in the end, all they are, is something for you to watch, to know, and ultimately to discard.

(MAG135) ELIAS: […] His performance during The Unknowing was… disappointing. I needed a way to force him to harness his ability more acutely than he had before. The coffin was a useful tool; Daisy an adequate bait.

………………… and yes, Jon will probably get a new injury on the way: he’ll get mauled by one of the Dark creatures in best case scenario, he could lose his eyes at worst (… does he even need them nowadays. I mean, YES it would be heart-breaking but. It sounds like One Of These Things very likely to happen to him.)… but I’m more worried about Basira.

Because if Elias is now factoring in that to push Jon further, you have to use the fact that he cares, Ny-Ålesund sounds like a Big Danger for BASIRA.

She was there when Maxwell Rayner was killed.

The only other witnesses were police officers (all Section 31’d nowadays). She didn’t kill Rayner herself but. But. I do not trust Elias one second to not spread (or have already spread) misleading rumours letting Dark cultists think that Basira had been the one to kill Maxwell Rayner. Jon had noticed people wearing the People’s Church pendants outside (MAG123) and we still don’t know why they’re hanging around so close to the Institute but really… I can’t help but feel like if they’re targeting someone, it’s Basira, and not Jon.

- About Jon’s feeling regarding the way the other staff members look at him…

(MAG135) ARCHIVIST: I don’t… like interacting with the rest of the Institute these days. The way they look at me, I– … I don’t know. I don’t know what they’ve heard, what the rumours going around are, but… they have definitely heard something…! [SIGH] And they can’t wait until they don’t have to talk to me anymore. Can’t honestly say I blame them, none of this is easy. Everyone’s just trying to get through as best they can. Living one day at a time. 

I’m not sure of what is happening, so:

* Is there indeed something noticeable in Jon nowadays? A gaze a bit too intense, an overall aura, something that makes you think “he’s spooky” without being able to pinpoint how? Too many eyes? Daisy was in the room when he read MAG133’s statement, I still feel like if anyone would be able to tell… it would be her.

* Alternatively, it… could also be an effect of the Lonely, again, since Jon had mentioned feeling isolated/lonely and… he’s very prone to feeling this as soon as he’s physically alone. It could just be that Jon feels like he can’t connect and that nobody wants to talk to him, while people are just… behaving towards him normally, but the Lonely is warping his perception.

* Alternatively: did Peter spread rumours on him through memos.

* Alternatively… oh, Jon… there could be so many reasons for people to not want to get involved with you Just In Case… Objectively: the Archives were attacked by Prentiss’s worms in Summer 2016. Jon was a mess for the following six months, before a body was discovered in the Archives and Sasha disappeared; Jon was on the run and the prime suspect. He came back and was on and off for a few months… before Tim died in an explosion in the Wax Museum alongside him, and Jon was hospitalised. And now he’s back. He means trouble, he means danger and, yes, people thought that Tim was having a breakdown when he was ranting about what was actually happening (as Martin told Jon in MAG102) but… Tim was popular. Tim used to be social, chatting with students and acting as relay between them and Jon (when they noticed errors in MAG033)… and Tim died.

Even Tim aside, there was the matter of Elias’s arrest and… Elias looked like he was actually well-liked by the staff? He was invested in the Institute’s life:

(MAG098) MELANIE: Uh, Martin? Have you seen Elias? MARTIN: Oh, uh… no. But Tuesday lunch he normally meets with the Library staff, I think?

And Rosie was chill with him (you don’t go “Yep, will do” at a boss you fear…). It’s possible that people resented Jon for Elias’s arrest and/or thought that Jon had framed him (which. to be honest.)? There are so many reasons for people to just… be wary of him, indeed…

- Jon’s voice was… something, at the beginning of MAG135. Sulky, tired, crushed? He reminded me of how he had introduced MAG129’s statement right after his encounter with Martin (clearly… unwell and plain sad); could have been caused by what he recounted regarding his interactions with the rest of the Institute, or by the content of the statement itself (it… wasn’t great news and Jon had no certainty about a possible positive outcome), but I wonder if it mightn’t be that reading statements left by Avatars is more taxing, since they’re more involved with the Fears? Does it feed Beholding a bit too much? He was very tired after Jane Prentiss’s; he collapsed after Breekon’s; he was clearly not fine with Manuela’s here. The only exception I can think of is MAG074 – Fatigue, which left him exhausted despite not apparently being (as far as we know) from an avatar?

- Raise your hand if Jon keeps slowly breaking your heart into small pieces when he has to tell himself, again and again, that he has to focus and that he can’t save everyone…

(MAG132) ARCHIVIST: I… heard someone. He was begging for me to save him. Said he couldn’t breathe. … I can barely breathe. I couldn’t find him. But I am… n–not here for him. I don’t even know him.

(MAG135) ARCHIVIST: At least, the coffin’s gone. I gave Artefact Storage some very specific instructions, and they’ve got it solidly sealed away. … Is locking it up the right thing to do? There are other people in there. And Daisy and I got out, but– … No, I, uh… I can’t think about that. Even if I could somehow be sure of recreating our escape, I–I can’t save everyone that’s been taken. I–It’s not my job to try, I– And I can’t spend another three days in there, I just… I need to let it go.

(But I’m still worried that this could be… how Gertrude started out, too. At first focusing on people around her and on the missions ahead, before gradually coming to thinking that the others were necessarily sacrifices for the Greater Good. Though in Jon’s case: he’s been… very consistently upset and sad for victims overall. So right now, he’s encouragingly… totally unlike Gertrude. Caring so much.)

- Bring as many torches as you can, once again. And your Web lighter, Jon? What happened to that one since the end of season 3 ;;

(… They don’t even need to go to Svalbard, actually, since there was still the matter of St. Paul’s Church in West Hackney, from MAG063, though Jon hadn’t managed to find any connection with the People’s Church of the Divine Host but… it was clearly a Dark creature lurking there? And the statement was from 2014.)

- If Team Archive goes to Norway in a group expedition trip… I’m picturing the door of the Archives, closed. Jon having left a note warning people that they’ll be away for a week or two, the Archives will be closed during that time. Scribble from Daisy underneath: “If we don’t die.” (Helen having added “Of fun!”, before adding something else about this door being closed, but people can still knock if they need a door, she’d do her bestest.) Melanie put a message encouraging to NOT take a job here if they happen to hire new staff after their disappearances in ~dark conditions~. Basira tried to salvage the memo with a mention about contacting the police with a mention of Section 31 if they failed. Martin passing by, one day, and losing it because pETER, WHAT DID YOU ALLOW TO HAPPEN AGAIN, YOU SAID THEY WOULD BE SAFE–

- Elias said the words “SVALBARD” and “AURORA BOREALIS” in an episode about “DARK MATTER”, so my heart is screaming and seeing this as His Dark Materials representation. Come on, the Archives crew are millennials, they have read the trilogy, right right right? :w

… Well, maybe not Jon, who probably didn’t manage to finish the first volume and/or gave up on the second one when he realized that Will’s cat wouldn’t be the main protagonist. (Maybe he secretly stanned Lyra a bit for her tendency to just run away from the College. And also panserbjørne. He would stan The Bears.) Sasha’s first dream job was to be a witch because Serafina was DANG COOL, with becoming an aeronaut coming in close second; cue Heated Bi Debates with Tim, because his tiny bi heart had been awakened through other options (Lord Asriel? Terrible, but hot!! Marisa Coulter? Terrible but hella hot!!). Basira got her lesbian awakening with Mary – smart clever scientist who went Fuck Injustice? Sign her up. Melanie loved Will, loved WILL’S KNIFE, and also loved to read about bears savagely murdering each other (oh no, sheer horror if she ever finds out she had that in common with Jon!). Helen might need to have the story told to her but she goes “!! I can open doors and Windows too! :D”. Georgie loved the technology and the Gallivespians communicating through Lodestone resonators (… actually, Jon probably made her think about the Gallivespians. A lot). … Aza mentioned to me that “ahah, Martin must have projected so hard on Will” and I hate her, it was supposed to be all fun headcanons but oh no now it’s awfully sad (=> Will’s mother being sick and needing his help! Not being reliable, but it doesn’t matter, she loves him! And turns out that Will’s dad had never abandoned them, not exactly, and that he had always loved them all very much!) (YEAH NOW IT’S SUPER SAD WHEN THINKING ABOUT MARTIN PROJECTING.)

(Let’s compensate the Sad by thinking about Jon and the assistants going on a boat trip to Norway, and NOTHING BAD HAPPENING, they’ll manage to neutralise the Dark’s feeble attempt and nobody will die or be gravely injured or traumatised by anything :| So they get to enjoy the trip, even if it’s probably on the Tundra and Jon is seething because still no sign of Peter Lukas anywhere, Martin is there though mostly inaccessible (… all alone on the boat to fuel it?), but Jon still managed to grab him at some point to have Meaningful Discussions in the cold of the deck, at night, when they’re undignifiedly bundled up in layers and layers of down jackets, Martin being especially starry-eyed at the starry sky because as he had mentioned in MAG113, he never got to travel much, and he’s getting Something Nice for once even if it’s when on their way to probably die a dark death – but they don’t and it stays something nice :[)

(What do you mean, I slept 2h30 last night and worked overtime today and I’m surviving thanks to my 7th coffee.)

MAG136’s title is out and AAAAAAAAAAAAH???? WEB??? WEB??? I want to think that a twist could be at work here (The Corruption and The Desolation ought to be offended, tfw still no episode almost halfway into season 4 :w) but it screams WEB, it screams especially strongly SHE, SHE, THE WIFE… Though Annabelle was “the story-spinner” and this is another title altogether. On the one hand, Jon has been repeatedly lamenting over his overall lack of direction, so it could be Her Cue to go see him in person or send him someone who survived her… but on the other hand mmmm, too soon for that maybe? Could also be something about Raymond Fielding, perhaps? (Or twist and it’s not Web.) (… second-meaning could be about so many people… Peter? Elias (ha, he wished.)? Annabelle?)

[paullicino]

Vancouver

As the sun sets into the Pacific Ocean, each mountain wears a different shade of serenity, growing fainter and fainter as they fade like ageing memories. The most distant lack all definition, dissolving into the sky, barely any different to the clouds above them.

Every time I see a view like this I think of the term aerial perspective. I think about how I learned it through my very imperfect attempts to educate myself about art. The background of the Mona Lisa shows aerial perspective. Leonardo was one of the first Western painters to show distant objects as hazy and indistinct. Some critics will suggest that it represents the mysterious nature of the subject. I think it represents the past.

I’m not a religious person, but I think every sunset might be a miracle. Many of my best memories are of summer evenings and if there’s an afterlife for people who have been good, it’s an infinite sunset where all the day’s duties are done and there are no more worries beyond choosing the best spot to sit. The world is awash with the most romantic of colours, but it’s also populated by the unremarkable and the urbane. These hours are made of a million tiny moments and the delight is in the details.

Everything is familiar. This city is almost the same as I left it, an experience I find strangely alienating. I was expecting adjustment. I was expecting to have to settle again. It’s as if every element but one is identical.

Me.

As the sun goes down, the skunks come out. They forage around bins and they scrape away at lawns because this is where they find the scraps and the bugs that make them plump and doddering. They can’t see very much and their terrible eyesight and constant hunger tempt them into all sorts of trouble. They will bumblingly and brazenly trace a scent straight to your feet before realising that you are a person, not a pole. What then follows is a flustered flurry of scuttling and confusion, but it’s all over in a moment and their noses are soon back on the ground.

Oh, to be scared for only a moment and then to be all right again.

I imagine the quick retreats and the wide berths they are given have helped downtown skunks become so habituated to humans. These great lanky creatures never interfere with them, even if they’re underfoot, leading to a complicated coexistence where it can sometimes be difficult not to step on a skunk and essential to accommodate its every whim. Dogs, however, introduce an entirely different dynamic and many a dog owner puts themselves in peril if they let their pet get too curious.

I have never had any trouble with these tiny trash animals. I have been investigated, followed and sniffed on more than a few occasions, but staying calm and showing that I am no threat has saved me every time. Making noise is also a sensible idea, as the creatures are often too caught up in their dinner to notice anything until it’s right on top of them.

I meet a lot of skunks because I go out a lot. I have never lived anywhere else where I go out so often. I frequently walk with no objective and no destination in mind. I don’t know what waits for me. I will find a fifty-year-old car in immaculate condition. I will find a raccoon on a fence. I will find a good cup of coffee. The small things are often the best. The delight is in the details.

This is the way it always was here, which feels very odd now. How can things be the same after so long?

It’s difficult for me to recall the final weeks of 2017, the time when Canadian immigration told me to leave. I know that, back then, I never expected to be gone for over a year and a half. I know that I saw my departure as an adventure and not the start of some seemingly endless journey. There weren’t supposed to be any great changes. None of the things that happened were supposed to happen.

Most of the people I have come back to here were not witness to those changes. They have not been where I have been. They have not seen or heard or touched or felt the things that I have. I feel that, should I start talking about all of my experiences, I might as well be telling fairy tales. Even now I’m not sure how real these things are. They fade. The most distant lack all definition.

I have been unpacking things that I left in storage with friends. I must’ve packed these things in a hurry, because some of them weren’t worth keeping and others are strange things to choose to pack. A few are extremely personal and very much needed looking after. They include a stuffed bear I have had since I was a year old and also my Cheburashka.

Nobody knows what Cheburashka is. He is “an animal unknown to science” who fell out of a box of oranges one day, somewhere in Soviet Russia, in a story not unlike a fairy tale. A series of stop-motion children’s films describe his attempts to understand himself and to make a home far away from wherever it is he is supposed to have come from. He finds a house and a job and friends and acceptance. He is small and brown and has large ears and behaves a little like a bear cub.

When I squeeze my Cheburashka he says indecipherable things in Russian about friendship and kindness. Unfortunately I can no longer reach out to the person who could translate these for me. I know one of the things he asks is if you’ll accept him without knowing what he is.

He sits beside my bed once more and watches as I try to understand myself and all the rest. My thoughts are indecipherable things in English about friendship and kindness.

Everything else I have unpacked has been a kind of digital time capsule. My old phone showed me photos and videos of routines I had taken for granted and never expected to lose. I turned on my iPad and it presented me maps of distant places full of distant people. My old, old laptop grunted and groaned and took a day to run dozens of updates, before grumbling that Windows 7 will soon be obsolete. Hey, it then said, here’s all the things you cared about in 2017. Here’s what you loved. Do you still love it? I don’t know, cause I’ve been sleeping so long and maybe your human love fades like your ageing memories.

I don’t know if we ever stop loving things. I’m not sure if there’s an expiry date or a statute of limitations. I know that I love sunsets and skunks, that I love fifty-year-old cars in immaculate condition, raccoons on fences and a good cup of coffee. I’m glad all of those things are still here. It can be all too easy to lose the things that you love, particularly when you chase after that which is less important.

The sun sinks below the Pacific Ocean, all of those mountains disappear into dusk and I know now that the most important things in the world are friendship and kindness. That people are priceless and paramount. That delight is in the details. That I had to make so many of the changes that I did in my life because of love. And that it’s really easy to forget, particularly in the pursuit of the less important.

Someone different came back to the same place. That’s the opposite of what was supposed to happen. But I’m so glad that I made all of the changes that I did. That I tried so much. That I never gave up hope. Because I almost did. That’s something I haven’t told you about yet.

It will be sunrise again soon and not so long until the next sunset. Aerial perspective will make everything about distance and definition. I will still love all the things I did in 2017. There were just a few things that happened in between.

Writing like this is funded by my Patreon. If you enjoyed this, please consider sharing it and supporting me there for as little as $2 a month. That’s less than 50 cents a week and the pledges I receive make a big difference to me.

[moonanagames]

Good and bad news, CHECK THIS OUT PLZ

(are... are you ready)

Haro my fellow earthlings and interplanetarian folks!

Today I bring good and bad news altogether, so please bear with me for a bit! Firstly, I wanted to talk about how development has been going since the very beginning, so let us go to our nice time capsule :D

This is a timeline of the development up until now, I tried to be the most accurate as I could, but it can be a bit difficult when I don’t remember many things anymore lol

The game is in development since January 2017. The timeline goes like this:

2017

From January to May, 20, I developed on my own my first public demo of Virgo Vs The Zodiac. It took longer as I was all by myself.

Then my Grandma said she wouldn’t be able to support me anymore if I was going to quit college to develop games. From May to August, I prepared the Crowdfunding Campaign to help me fund the project and my EXISTENCE. The Campaign was launched in September 2017, I think.

After the campaign ended, I could finally get Anglerman onboard! Ay! He does animations for enemies and some party members animations too and is also the greatest deity of our lives. A legend. He helped me a lot with the Game Design Document I was working on because new people would join and I needed to make the things in my head to be a bit more concrete.

From the end of the Campaign until October we were working with a another programmer, but that didn’t work too well since they had another big project they were working on at the time. We had to change the programmer. It was when I found Ben here on Tumblr, current lead programmer. Our lord and savior.

After that I was browsing tumblr randomly and I found Veyerals among asks sent to this tumblr and thought his work with menus was pretty cool (and I liked his game as well, played a lot of that back then). Veyerals joined the project too as the UI programmer and would also be working with the SHMUP mini games, which he had experience with. Bless the UI G.O.D.

From that point on we had to basically rebuild the game from scratch from the moment we got the new programmers. Not only develop the game from scratch, but doing everything RPG Maker already had built in for us into the new engine because that was the only thing I knew in terms of “programming”. That and adding everything new I thought for the project. It was a huge amount of work, and we only had a battle system working fine in December, where we started developing a new build.

(concept art of lady nurse)

2018

In this year things got a bit complicated!

At first, when the battle system was mainly “complete”, as we thought back then, we delivered a 15 mins build for ID@XBOX to be shown at the Game Developers Conference, on January 2018.

We had billions of problems from january to august with the development and also unrelated to the development, like dealing with US taxes. A lot of things weren't working as we wanted them to be, this time was mostly spent on making the timed hits to feel nice, rebuilding the base systems and trying to make the game to have the same feeling as the RPG Maker build had of it being challenging. Also, overall asset production. That was demanding as heck. In RPG Maker the enemies didn't move, while in Game Maker they were animated. I had never worked with Game Maker before, so me and Anglerman (the animator and fellow game designer) had to learn the engine from scratch while developing the game, that resulted in a lot of set backs, but lead us to where we are now. We're confident with the overall game's scaling, difficulty, battles and systems. In Game Maker the maps are also bigger and have way more polishing, so that took a lot of time to get used to on the new engine.

(a really weird, but solved, bug)

From that point on we built Capricorn, and started working on Taurus and other realms at the same time. After some time we determined that doing several realms at the same time, even though we knew which level the player would be wouldn't work well, and we decided to finish the realms before heading to other realm.

Billion lines of code later, in october we started development of the first 2 hours and a half of Taurus. All of it took one month and a half. It was a significant improvement from the previous 5 months to develop the same amount of gameplay! We determined that we can finish the game on the first half on 2019 upon seeing the progress of the development in Taurus. Now we have a stable work flow, as our lead programmer only has to work on random tiny things, for example, "I would like for Virgo to throw Alpacas for an event, can you add that?". Those are small details that Ben can do easily. Everything that was promised on the campaign, like SHMUP minigames and the crafting system is also all working nicely and well.

That brings us to the bad news: The release will be delayed, for all the reasons exposed before. At first we thought of keeping with the date announced in the Crowdfunding Campaign of December 4th and release the game in Early Access. However it all seemed unfair to the Beta Backers who donated first to get access to early builds of the game. Other than that, a save system of something like a RPG such as Virgo Vs The Zodiac wouldn’t work well with the early access system of Steam. Just imagine your save messing up every time the game is updated. That would be just bad. xD Unfortunately I didn’t know that back then when I announced the date, and I didn’t know the amount of hassle I would go through to learn the engine while developing the game. I can only blame my naiveness, honestly. Other than that, December isn’t a good time to release games because of the Steam Sale that makes it harder for new games to be noticed with so many games on sale.

With that being clarified, I can say now that the game would most likely be released in the first half of 2019, around Q2. I apologize deeply and am extremely sad, I was even avoiding saying this here and avoiding social medias in general due to anxiety attacks <_< I’m sorry for that as well! For anyone who said their birthday was in the same day as the game’s release, I apologize immensely, and please send me a message and I’ll send you a card of Sagittarius wishing you a happy birthday. It’s the only thing I can do now, to be honest. S O R R Y =(

O U T R A G E O U S

New possible release date: Q2 2019.

As for the good news now:

Taurus Realm Build For Backers

The Taurus build I was talking about will be sent to backers this week! :D You can expect a bossfight with a Zodiac, millions of new characters, around 1800 new lines of dialogues, new equipment to check, new fellows to beat or spare, quests and the SHMUP minigame, now implemented on the game! Also, as seen on the trailer, you can throw enemies off screen now :3

Kinda Funny Games Showcase

We’ll also be participating on Kinda Funny’s Games Showcase that’ll be happening in December 8th! You’ll be able to see a new trailer of Virgo Vs The Zodiac on the stream that’ll be happening on Kinda Funny’s Twitch. That’s a really cool opportunity for us, so eternal thanks to Greg Miller for chosing VvtZ. That got me by surprise! xD

Date: Saturday, December 8th

Time: 10am PT

I think that’s it! Basically we had a lot of setbacks, but we’re in the right path again now and I can say doing anything is faster as is! The game’s quality improved and the development became more demanding of our skills, but it’s also a nice challenge for everyone. I’m glad to have started this project, my life was pretty dull back then, I had lost many important things before and VvtZ brought sparkle back to my life. That’s important, as even in the most difficult times I can remember I’m creating something I have so much fun with. I’m blessed to have all the people who support me on Virgo Vs The Zodiac discord, who supported me in the campaign and everyone around social medias. It’s what makes my days happier, tbh.

Ever since I began development I lost contact with many of my friends from the other city I lived in, but I also made many other precious friends who helped me along the way! All the good and bad memories on my life shaped this place I created for myself in the world. I like this place, it’s comfy :3 Again, I’m sorry for ruining your expectations to have the game up on Steam this year, it’s a first delaying the development like this. As a Taurus I can say it pains the most to not have things done when I need them to be despite the hard work going behind this game. Damned Bugs. I want the bugs to die. Gotta work even harder from now on to extinguish bugs the maximum we can!

[fly-pow-bye]

DuckTales 2017 - “Nothing Can Stop Della Duck!”

Story by: Francisco Angones, Madison Bateman, Colleen Evanson, Christian Magalhaes, Bob Snow

Written by: Colleen Evanson

Storyboard by: Vince Aparo, Emmy Cicirega, Ben Holm

Directed by: Tanner Johnson

Sorry for the wait.

This episode directly continues from the last episode, and I decided not to spoil the ending in that review. One thing that can already be implied by that title card I have is that Della does indeed make it back to Duckberg and reunite with her family. Before she can, she spends quite a bit of time trying to get to that reintroduction.

Specifically, she needed to find the best way to reintroduce herself. Well, that, and having to readjust to Earth's gravity and realizing she can't just jump over the gate. I like how the clouds move in the background with every cut, showing that she is taking quite a while on just this one step.

Right behind that door, Scrooge McDuck has found the Cartographer's Quill: a magic quill that makes maps to. One special thing about this scene is that, if this is the first episode you ever seen, this one scene does show each of the nephew and honorary niece's personalities very well. Scrooge exclaims this will be the most important adventure of their lives.

Della Duck: Sup party people! I'm back in the hizouse! ...oh, that was terrible, can I get a do-over?

Needless to say, those quill plans will have to wait for an indefinite amount of time.

One thing I'm glad to note is that they do bring up one of the most obvious questions that has come up since we've learned whatever happened to Della Duck: how did Scrooge not see her on the moon? They didn't answer it, but Scrooge does say he did indeed search the moon. They don't go any further than this, because there's far more important matters at hand, but the wonder is still there. Future episode, perhaps?

Speaking of wonder, Huey, Dewey, and Louie finally get to see their Mom outside of one photo. Or, as she wanted to name them, Jet, Turbo, and Rebel, respectively. I guess it's neat, and Dewey really thinks so, but was Della just that lucky to name her kids after their personalities before they were even born? Must be a mother's intuition.

Dewey the first to say something, and he says “who’s the cyborg?” Either the long hair threw him off for a second, or, after what felt like years, they just don’t think it could honestly be their long lost mother. Dewey just immediately goes for a hug, showing right off the bat that he's going to be the mama's boy.

How do you survive in a barren wasteland? Barren I could understand. Is that what he thinks the moon is? She never modified her leg, because as the Junior Woodchuck says...by the time she mentions that, Huey's already going to make this a group hug. Louie seemingly needs more time to think about it, thinking this could be another trap from Magica. In a few seconds, he completes the group hug anyway.

As for Webby, she's just crying over how heartfelt this scene is. I usually say these scenes are just trying to force a reaction, but...me too, Webby, me too.

This is going to be a constant through the episode, and while this is spelled out for us at one point, we can tell what everyone feels just through their expressions and actions. As said before, Dewey is a pure mama's boy, which makes sense since he's been the one looking for her since episode 1 of this reboot. In contrast, Louie always has this disinterested expression on his face. Huh, and she wanted to call him Rebel. She really is a great mother. Huey is somewhere in the middle.

Since the family is finally reunited, with one exception I will talk about later, this episode starts a new arc. Della is essentially a brand new character to the DuckTales canon. This show needs to get this new character to fit in, and this episode is essentially the in-universe version of that.

Della is happy to be with her family, and vice-versa for the most part, but she wonders where her brother is. Webby tells her that Donald is currently on vacation, much to Della's disapproval, but she's sure it was much needed.

Oh yeah, that's the other thing. Remember when I said the Donald and Della plots in the last episode felt connected in all but the situations they were in? Turns out, I could have added a "yet" to that. See, he saw the rocket fall to Earth, knew immediately that it was Della, and rushed to reunite with his long lost sister. However, his trademark bad luck set in, as Della already left the rocket, and Donald accidentally pressed that "irreversible emergency launch" switch.

He's lost in space now, and the worst part is that nobody else knows. At least with Della, Scrooge knew what happened to her, even if he never knew where exactly she went until now. To everyone else, Donald's just having a vacation, probably napping on one of the cruise ship's many, many hammocks. The episode makes a few cuts to Donald's current situation, revealing a few more details, but we'll save that for another review.

Back to the Earth, we see that most of the episode is her trying her hardest to be "the best mom ever" to make up for all the lost time. She makes her kids cakes for various special occasions. She even makes a special cake made out of Fizzy Rocks. Dewey ends up being the only, because he wants to shift to Turbo!

Della tries to tell the kids a bedtime story, but the kids are a bit too old for fairy tales, so she has to tell another story from her past. This time, we hear a story from her childhood, and it turns out that the apples don’t fall far from the tree, as she also adventured to distant places.

Specifically, this is the story of the Gilded Man of El Dorado; similar the golem of Jewish legend, except from the Aztec civilization. Originally a protector of the people, the Gilded Man blew a fuse and caused the golden streets to be covered blood red from all the gnawed bodies. She really pushes this story as hard as TV-Y7 can go.

Della stopped him and his "gory gears", but even she’s not sure if the robot will awaken and seek vengeance on their family. Oh yeah, and it’s probably sitting in the garage. Needless to say, this does not help the boys sleep.

The next morning, after getting a haircut, Della wakes up her kids with an airhorn, and brought them airhorns of their own. She then tries to teach Huey how to do an amazing skateboard trick with a shield from a nearby suit of armor. Not helping matters is that aforementioned airhorn made Huey temporarily deaf throughout most of the episode.

This goes about as well as one might expect, though Louie does initially get a rare moment of happiness in this episode. Sure, this is reckless child endangerment, but he could get a sick viral video out of it. Unfortunately, he ends up getting hurt as well, and this causes a ruckus that a nearby Mrs. Beakley can only sigh at.

Mrs. Beakley: (after lifting a fallen chandelier with one hand) I’m used to cleaning up after children, dear.

Ouch. This isn't the only household dweller that she'll have a negative relationship with, though in this next case, it's vice versa.

See, Della used to be Scrooge McDuck's pilot, and she's none to happy to find out that Launchpad happens to be her replacement. Yeah, how dare Scrooge McDuck get another pilot when his pilot goes missing for 10 years! This doesn't get brought up again in this episode, in fact, Launchpad doesn't even appear after this, but, again, this will probably be a subject of a future episode.

She sneaks up on a family meeting, where Scrooge is essentially talking about the very point of this episode. The boys tell Scrooge that while she might be endangering them, she's only trying her best and she's their mom. At least, Dewey and Huey seem to think so. Louie, who has been the least happy so far, admits that he doesn't know how to say it, but says that, as he hasn’t had a mom for so long, he doesn’t know how to have one. Scrooge has a theory on that.

Scrooge: That's because she's not a mom! (waits about 10 seconds) ...not yet anyway, she’s been gone for so long.

In those ten seconds, Della already ran off into the garage, sobbing and talking to herself about how she’s blowing it. She wishes she can have a monster to fight, and...

...oh, hi, Gilded Man! Turns out, he really did end up in Scrooge's garage, currently in an indefinite slumber. I'd say more, but my thought process ended up being "She's going to activate it, she's going to activate it, she's going to activate it..."

Sure enough, this golden android only needed a kick in the...hands to get activated. Okay, maybe that saying wouldn't go anywhere.

Della Duck: Aw, phooey.

Eh, she said it better the first time. Maybe I'm just a little miffed that she's essentially replacing her brother, and she's outright stealing his catchphrase. Della tries to deal with it herself, because "nothing can stop Della Duck!" The title kind of fit in a different way than I expected. Scrooge shows up, wondering what is going on, and is forced to face off against the giant golden monster.

After making an attempt to beat up this robot with his cane, not exactly working like it would in the NES game, Della bumps into something. This causes a Rube Goldberg effect that ends with a propeller landing on a car, causing its alarm to go off. Suddenly, the robot mysteriously puts his hands over his ears. Almost like he really hates noise, but they don’t really catch on.

They're probably distracted by family drama, of course. While this monster mysteriously stopped, Della confronts Scrooge that she heard what he said about her not being a mom. Scrooge then turns off the car alarm so he can explain the rest of what he said. Unfortunately, this conversation would have to take a break before it can make any progress of talking sense into Della before she goes on some reckless treasure hunting, because that robot is going towards them again!

It feels like the episode is setting up what Della wanted in the episode: she would save the McDuck Manor by herself, proving that she's the most adventurous Mom ever. Both Webby and Scrooge, usually invincible in this series, are essentially damsels in distress. As for Mrs. Beakley, the former Agent 22 and lifter of an entire chandelier, she gets knocked out by the monster, too.

Della tries to stop the monster as well, in the same way that she stopped the monster before, but finds that growing up sucks in at least one other way. There are three more people that haven't got involved, and, seemingly on a hunch, Dewey decides to use his airhorn. It's here that Della finally learns that the creature is weak to noise, and it's possible the kids might be able to save the day.

It turns out to be a mixture of both the mother and her children that save the day in the end, which is fitting. The boys combine their airhorns with duct tape, even showing them rushing in and getting the duct tape from Donald Duck's houseboat. I don't think anyone would have questioned if they just had it on them, but the attention to detail is much appreciated. This airhorn contraption is then shoved right into the Gilded Man's neck, and Della uses her metallic leg to jam those buttons right in.

Della even gets to show off how great of a mother she is, and it's not by defeating a giant monster or finding a huge treasure like she said she would. She detaches her robotic leg, jumping out of the android, and saves one of the boys from getting crushed by the rapidly deteriorating robot.

I kind of saw this coming: it's Louie she saves. This finally gets Louie to say "thanks, Mom". My heart's just too full. I've said in the last review that this is the end of an arc and also the beginning of a new one. She's never really annoying, overpowered, or out-of-place with the established characters. She just wants to be a good mother, and that's all that matters.

This family bonding is missing something, and I'll just say that Donald's in for a lot of trouble. Unfortunately, it's going to be a while before we find out whatever happened to Donald Duck, and while I didn't spoil a twist in the last episode that shows up here as well, it's not the focus of the episode. Another future episode!

How does it stack up?

This is another big episode. I'd argue it's better than The Golden Spear in that it doesn't seem to repeat itself as much. There's a few scenes in this that I skimmed through, but trust me, they are funny to watch. I couldn't hate this one, it's too precious.

Had enough of Della? First, why? Second, too bad, because the next episode has her, too.

← The Golden Spear! 🦆 Raiders of the Doomsday Vault! →