#i just had gyros for dinner again

[protect-daniel-james]

Happy and Round.

[saintescuderia]

pancakes (pt. 6)

AKA - the story of how the naive australian rookie befriended the gym junkie F1 hospitality worker with the shoe collection - and inadvertently broke the grid's most treasured and unspoken rule: you don't go for y/n.

series masterlist here :) // the pancakes recipe here :)

antinal reference ;)

A/N: to make up for being MIA (and that this sunday might be another miss) here's a double update. enjoy.

P6 - pre-workout for jet-lag

You still found it odd to call Australia home.

You had mixed feelings about the country stamped across the front page of your passport. Your auntie had been the one to organise the papers so that Australian would be your identification. Never mind the hospital bed in Monaco that you were birthed. Or that you were first words were in Arabic. 

Still, your travelling auntie’s own experiences meant that when you came into her care, she would raise you Australian. Never mind any of the other stuff. 

So, when you walked into the house in Melbourne, you were met with an Egyptian lady playing French music, dressed in a Korean football jersey, cooking Greek food. Such was the life of a nomadic English teacher that was your aunt Nadia. Dia for short.

“Ah, it's you." She sat, spying you hauling the suitcase through the door. She looked at the clock by the fridge and then frowned. "You weren't supposed to land yet."

"I landed an hour ago." You said. She looked at the clock again and took it off the fridge. She banged it with one hand and then shook her head, muttering under breath.

"I'm sorry. Did you take an Uber?"

"No. Oscar gave me a lift." Well, technically his father had driven the car.

Oscar’s parents were apparently super excited to meet you and gushed all through the way about how glad they were that their son had you to help him through F1. They had even insisted on dinner but Oscar knew you had stayed up - you had made him do the same thing as you - and thankfully postponed it for a breakfast tomorrow after you both got to finally got to sleep. 

Upon leaving Jeddah, you had looked at the flight times and decided to overdose the 400mg of pre-workout and strategically placeyour workout just before leaving the hotel so that you and Oscar could both avoid the jet-lag many other F1 personnel were struggling with.

So far, it was on track to working. You just needed to push through a few more hours. To do so, Oscar was going to watch the footy. You were going to watch football.

“Ah, this young Oscar." Your aunt was nodding. "I like him. He has a trusting face.” She laughed at you, doing nothing to help but continue to watch you clamber into the well-loved and mis-matched dining furniture in her kitchen. “You hungry?”

“Tired.” You said, checking the time. It was 5pm but you were ready to knock out. Just a few more hours. You willed yourself to push through and avoid the jet-lag.

“Did you eat?”

You hadn’t. You never ate airplane food. 

The silence was answer enough as your auntie plated up some gyros for you. The smells of the seasoned meat filled your nose and your stomach rumbled at the site of it. You picked up your fork, ignoring the bread for the sake of your cut but helping yourself to tzatziki. 

"What's with the Korean jersey." You couldn't help but ask. You watched your auntie's back with CHO GUE-SUNG.

"Oh, he's such a handsome man. So polite too. I met him when I was teaching abroad in Seoul."

You opened your mouth but closed it. Your auntie lived a very unbelievable life at the best of times.

"He was nice. Nice face. Good hair. You should date him." Dia said as if she was commenting about the weather and you rolled your eyes, chewing through the food. She gave you a look. "Better a footballer than a driver."

You gave her a look. She never did like Danny. Much less you two together.

"Speaking of footballers, your uncle called. Went on and on in Italian about how your talents are wasted with cars and you should come to a real sport."

You snorted hearing this. Your uncle's work in football (not soccer, football) and your line of expertise had some people baffled that you hadn't joined him. Only the select few who knew your mother understood just why that was.

Still, every month your uncle sighed at the wasted talent! that you, a world class performance trainer! was stuck making coffee! for some fancy drivers!

Save that your uncle would add in a few choice Italian expletives in the mix.

"So, the usual?" You concluded.

"The usual." Dia nodded. She came to sit down in front of you. Pulling out her phone, she began showing you pictures of her recent teaching stint in South Korea. Your aunt had been there for about six months, working at an international school. And befriending Korean football players apparently.

“I thought you were teaching in Paris.” You said between mouthfuls of seasoned meat. 

“That was before.” Dia waved a dismissive hand. She dropped her phone and then stood up to pull out two wine glasses. Your aunt gave you a look and you shook your head. She put one back with a roll of her eye. “Wine is good for you.”

“I’m already taking resveratrol.” You said. “And I’m on a cut.”

“That’s why no bread.” Dialooked down at the plate full of untouched pita bread. She was well aware of your health habits. “Actually, I went to Egypt recently! Ah!” She went to the cupboard above the microwave and pulled out a shoebox full of small boxes. You knew immediately what it was. Bringing the shoebox to the table, Dia began pulling out various medicines she had brought from Egypt. 

“You will need this for your travels.”

“I have all of this.”

“Do you have Antinal?”

“Yes.”

“Take some extra." Dia still pushed it to you. "Give it to Charles.”

“I don’t speak to Charles.” You said.

Your aunt huffed and looked up at the ceiling, calling to God. “Ya rab. This fight with Charles needs to stop. Pascale and I are sick of it.” You didn’t comment any further on it. It was, admittedly, quite hard when there were so many other people involved. Pascale and Nadia were best friends. It was how you and Charles had grown up so close. The fact that you were family friends made it hard since Charles had pretty much cut you off. Granted, he was polite and you knew he still greeted your aunt Dia with a kiss on each cheek every time she’d visited Monaco. But still. 

“I will give them to Charles.” She said, taking a box back.

“You do that.” You said as she still pushed one boxes of the yellow medicine in front of you. “Dia, I already have this.”

“For Oscar. Yallah.”

“Anti-diarrhoea pills?"

"Oi, mate. You better be grateful. That shit's a miracle." You said, dropping the yellow box in Oscar's hands as you both walked down the Paddock. You had checked your phone this morning to the beautiful news that you would be working for McLaren today. You texted Oscar the news and the next day he had your coffee order ready in the cupholder of the car he picked up you up in. 

It didn't feel odd. It should've, but it didn't. Maybe it was because you and Oscar had already spent the most of the morning together. You had breakfast with his parents - his dad taking a moment to quietly pull you aside to say thank you for supporting Oscar - and then hit a gym sesh.

In fact, you almost forgot that you and Oscar was supposed to be working in different domains until you both had to get dressed and found him waiting for you outside the Paddock dressed in shorts, a McLaren t-shirt and accompanying brand cap.

It made you look down at your black Hospitality wear and wonder just how things would go if you were wearing the same clothes as him.

Well, for one thing, you would have to wear those ugly ass shoes. You looked down at your feet clad in some Nike Cortez and tried to take that as consolation. You weren't dressed in team uniform but at least that meant you had your shoes.

Still, the oddity of seeing a driver openly interact with the Hospitality staff turned some head as you walked down the Paddock together. You were half tempted to tell Oscar to go ahead but it didn't make sense. You were both going to the same place - the McLaren motorhome.

Oscar, however, was barely paying attention to any of this. No, his attention was still stuck on the medicine you had given him.

"Why do I need," He paused and flipped the box over to read the label that was in English, "Antinal?"

"Because you're travelling around the world more now that you're in F1 and have an additional ten or so race weekends added to your calendar." You explained as Oscar read what minimal English was on the medicine box "And so you're gonna be trying a lot more foreign food. Gotta be prepared, man." You patted him on the shoulders as a form of consolation. Oscar just laughed. 

"I must say, when you texted me that you had got me something, I didn't think it would be this."

"Technically my auntie did." You said before explaining how you would probably needed to purchase another 23kg suitcase from all the things your aunty was adamant you have with you for the rest of the season. Oscar was laughing at the five packets of sunflower seeds your aunt thought was an essential when you clocked it. 

Or, better yet, them. Charles and Carlos.

Both staring at you. And Oscar. 

You felt a jolt rush through you realised. Oscar's latest girlfriend update went to background noise as you took in the two Ferrari drivers stood there.

Carlos was appraising, his head slightly tilted as he clearly was observing the two of you. You could only imagine what he noted.

You. Oscar. Laughter. Gift exchanged. Mention of relatives and close family.

Still, the kind Spaniard's eyes were a lot easy to take in than Charles. 

Charles who was clearly fuming. 

Or, clearly to you. You knew his angry tells. Right fist clenches then unfurls. Left hand runs through hair. Lips are pursed. And then he walks off. 

You watched as Charles said something to Carlos and then turned around to stalk off. You watched his retreating form with forlorn eyes and before you caught Carlos looking at you. The furrow between your brows where you had probably stared longingly after the best friend who left you in the dust immediately fell when you looked at Carlos. 

That was the first time that Charles was actually acknowledging your existence in how long.

You drew your eyes back to Carlos who was still looking at you. You smiled you found yourself even lifting up a hand to wave. You saw his eyebrows raise slightly and his lips lift into a smile. He waved back. Then someone called his name and you saw his cousin and manager appear from the Ferrari motorhome. You turned back to look at Oscar who was still talking, unaware of anything that happened in the past minute.

"... anyway Lily wants to meet you and - "

"Have you copped any shit?" You interrupted Oscar and turned to him. You had both neared the McLaren Motorhome and knew this would be where you both parted ways. 

"Copped shit from who?"

"Other drivers." You specified.

"I mean I haven't really had a chance to speak with them." Oscar said, pursing his lips as if he thought about it. "The Williams guys are nice. Alex is funny."

"Alex is funny." You agreed. You did like Alex. He had a good heart. You would forever be salty at what Red Bull did to him. 

"Lewis said hello, which was nice. Fernando reminded me his career is older than me." You couldn't help but snort at that. Oh, Nando.

"And Lando is... well, Lando." You perfectly understood just what Oscar meant by that. His words, however, also confirmed what you had suspected. None of the 'core' drivers that surrounded Ferrari or Red Bull's circles had come near him. You knew that many of the guys had gone out a few times to celebrate the start of the season and the fact that Oscar had very clearly not been invited was, well, getting to you.

Especially since you were 99.9% sure you were the reason why. 

You stared at the young Australian boy in front of you and felt two things wash over you. 

The first was sadness.

A lame word but there was no other way to describe it. Infuriated, annoyed, hurt - sure. But you were also just sad. Sad that this was your life and that anyone close to you still managed to get tainted by the things you were forced to lug around yourself. 

The second was fondness.

The boy was young and innocent but carried himself with wisdom and dignity beyond his mere 20 years. And his dry ass sarcasm was a special type of humour you missed having around you. He was caring, loyal and an overall good sport. Having Oscar around made you realise how long it has been since you've laughed. He drove you the airport, bought you food and stayed up to watch old FRIENDS reruns after finding out Daniel Ricciardo had cornered you in the gym. 

"Your love language is quality time." Was his reasoning when he had arrived at your hotel room. And so he ordered some KFC and got comfortable in your hotel room to watch Chandler and Joey forget Ross' baby on a bus. You knew Oscar didn't like sit-coms -- it was a recurring argument -- but he watched five episodes that night after you had texted him feeling panicked and needing help when Daniel arrived drunk at the gym.

In short, in that moment, you were suddenly hyperaware of how much you really, really, really fucking loved Oscar Piastri. 

So maybe that's why you just came out with it. 

"Jos Verstappen has a restraining order against me." 

Oscar blinked. Once. Twice. Clearly he wasn't expecting you to say that. You weren't even expecting you to really say it. 

"Come again?"

"Well his wife does." You corrected. "Because the courts wouldn't accept a man of his size him to need protection from little old me." You rubbed your arm, feeling the full vulnerability of what you were doing. You thought of your next words carefully, making sure to not step over the NDA you had signed. "I used to train Max when he was at Torro Rosso and then at Red Bull. I always saw bruises on his arms. One day I..." you huffed, hating that you legally couldn't say what had actually happened. "Well, I ended up beating Jos Verstappen half to death."

Oscar was silent. His face was void of much reaction. He wasn't even looking you in the face but staring at the ground in his pensive state. You were aware that you both had stopped walking and were stood to the side. 

"Is that why you don't officially work as a trainer and had to be all pedantic with training me?" All you could do was nod to his question. Oscar shook his head. "I mean, I've heard the stories about Max and his dad but..." 

Now it was your turn to blink. Once. Twice. You frowned and Oscar finally met your eyes and you were stunned to see the easy going grin on his face once more. It hadn't disappeared. "I can only guess you had to sign an NDA and this isn't the full story. And even if it is, well, it's enough to know you were protecting someone from a -- well, an abuser." 

"I... Yeah. Thanks." You weren't sure what you were thanking him for. For believing you? For not treating you differently? For taking your side when everyone in Formula 1 had dropped you and treated you like a leper?

"Is that why you and Ricciardo fell through?" Oscar asked. It wasn't nosy. You had explained enough to him. It was enough he knew what happened. 

"No Danny, he, uh-." You hated how small your voice sounded. Or that you immediately fell back to his nickname. "He cheated."  

Oscar was silent, waiting for you to continue. And so you did so. You told him everything. From Daniel to Charles to the moment you punched Jos Verstappen in the face.

Carlos Sainz was ready to punch someone in the face.

He sat there at the table, fist curled tight as he tried to calm down from all that he was hearing. It seems like his name would only be an added tag to an otherwise Charles Leclerc fest of a season. Carlos knew, sure, that coming into a Ferrari where his teammate was known as Il Predestinato would mean that he needed to prove himself, put himself in the spotlight and make the Tifosi give him a name like that.

However, as the current race strategy meeting was showing, it seemed like no one in Ferrari was going to give Carlos the chance.

"Now, boys, I have something to discuss with you two." Fred said as people were starting to leave and the meeting seemingly coming to an end. Carlos wanted nothing more than to get up and storm off but he reigned it and listened to the change in Fred's tone.

"What's up?" Charles asked, sitting up.

"Quietly, there was a team principal meeting with Domenicali." Fred said, and this time Carlos sat up also. His anger was momentarily forgotten as his interest piqued. "McLaren have unofficially started working with a girl to train their rookie." Charles was playing with his APM Monaco bracelets, somewhat paying attention. Carlos watched him. There was one particular bracelet he always fiddled with, a small gold chain tucked amidst all the other extravagant pieces.

"She's a Hospitality worker."

Carlos saw how Charles froze. His teammate looked up. Carlos saw the horrified look on his face.

"Quoi?" The French slip was only further proof of something. Carlos's mind raced to make the connection.

The lighbulb went off just before Fred said it.

"She was your friend, non?" Fred said. "Worked with Max Verstappen in Torro Rosso." His eyes flickering over to Carlos. They had been teammates back then.

Charles's years and years of media training went out the window as he struggled to make sense of what he was hearing. Carlos, however, was suddenly thrown back a few years and thinking about just who had caused this whole shitstorm.

You.

Carlos said your name, feeling something swell up in him by saying your name in front of Charles who was your former best friend. Maybe it was ego from the recent meeting, but Carlo wanted to drive the knife in a little deeper.

"She's a very good trainer. I watched her sessions with Verstappen." And that wasn't on showing up Charles; it was the truth. Max's dominance needed to be at least somewhat accredited to you.

"Turns out she is not allowed to work for new teams." Fred spoke. "That means for McLaren to hire her goes against some contract Formula 1 put in place after an incident with Verstappen."

There was a pause. Carlos waited for Charles to say something - to say it. He didn't. So Carlos did.

"She was defending Max." Carlos said, defending you when he thought the silent Monacoan beside him would've. Didn't you two grow up together?

The Verstappen Incident, Carlos was well aware of. However, whatever happened between you and Charles... well, Carlos was out of the loop.

"It doesn't matter." Fred waved. "I'm not here to speak of the drama. But I did have a look. Mattia never told me but she has ties with Ferrari from before - "

"But she's a Hospitality worker!" Charles finally spoke up. "Mattia he-- I spoke to him about her."

"You did?" Fred took that piece in. Carlos wanted to scoff. Clearly Mattia hadn't mentioned that in the hand over notes. "What did Mattia say?" Fred asked.

"Peut-être on peut parler juste nous deux." Charles said, the switch the French reigniting Carlos' anger once more. He forced himself to breathe steadily while Fred nodded. Both men had often tried to keep to English in front of him for the sake of manners and being polite, as opposed to using their mother tongue and making Carlos feel, well, like he felt now. Excluded. Enraged.

Still, Carlos' French skills were okay enough for understand what Charles had said. He stood up and, in French, said. "I'll leave you two." Without looking back, he walked out the motorhome trying to steel himself.

He really wanted to punch something.

Walking a little ways down the Paddock, he took deep breaths and shot a flurry of texts to his dad. He needed his advice on what to do given the way the meeting had gone. It was then that a girl on rollerblades holding the Australian flag zoomed past him and Carlos looked up.

The entertainment at Albert Park never missed. Carlos smiled slightly. Australia was a fun circuit. Not his favourite track by any means but the actual circuit itself had a lot going on that he enjoyed. It was lively, music always pumping and the weather was nice.

Still, the sounds of laughter and the faint dance music that echoed through the Paddock weren't enough to lift his spirits.

And then he saw you.

You were walking with Lando's new teammate, the infamous Oscar something. He hadn't paid much attention to the newbie, hearing something vaguely about Alpine drama from Lando. It all had gone in one ear and out the other.

Now, Carlos saw you walking with him and suddenly he wished he knew more about the kid. Why him? Why were you friends with him? Since when did you have friends? And why risk it all just to train him?

Carlos had always been perfectly polite, nice. Why didn't you laugh with him? Why didn't you reach into your bag to pull out a small box and hand to him as you explained him whatever gift you had brought him? What made this Oscar kid so lucky?

Maybe it was just the Australians seeking out one another? Everyone on the Grid knew you had dated Ricciardo. That had been a painful experience. It was one thing to have pined after you, as Max his teammate's trainer. It was another to see you get swept off your feet by the senior Red Bull driver that everyone adored. Carlos' days at Red Bull sucked since all he did was think about you - and you barely paid him any attention.

Sure, he was now no longer Ricciardo's junior but it still got to him. Daniel Ricciardo had waltzed in and you had gone wide-eyed before Carlos could've even tried.

Because he would've. He really would've. Even before his dad told him who your uncle was. Even before he tried your cooking, your coffee. Even before he knew your name. A young Carlos Sainz had seen a pretty girl walking around in the same Real Madrid kit that he owned at home and immediately wanted to go up to her, to ask her name, to ask her out.

Carlos felt the door behind him open and out came Charles. He looked completely at ease despite what had occurred before. He patted Carlos on the shoulder. And just as he did that, Carlos' phone beeped. His father.

Don't get mad. Just get even on the track.

Carlos pocketed his phone but felt something ignite inside him. He would do that. It wasn't Charles' fault for Ferrari's favouritism. Carlos had to admit the Monégasque was a genuinely nice guy.

"You alright, mate?" Charles asked. "I'm really sorry about before."

"I'm alright. Excited for the race." Carlos said, changing the subject and not mentioning it at all. If anything, he would stay out if it all and just focus on the race, on proving everyone wrong. He take his father's advice and make his own mark in this team.

"Ah, Australia is always special." Charles said.

Despite what his father had said, anger came back within Carlos. It was the same anger he felt towards that Australian kid. And Daniel Ricciardo. And, to an extent, Max.

Carlos was jealous. Not for Charles' favouritism from Ferrari, but the favouritism from you. Charles had you and he'd thrown you out for whatever reason.

Carlos' eyes came back to you and suddenly he couldn't help himself. Sure, he could stay out of all the Ferrari drama but this was you. He couldn't stay out of it when you were right there, walking beside the new kid who didn't know that Charles had essentially banned every driver from interacting with you.

"Yeah?" Carlos spoke before he even realised. "What's so special about Australia?"

The answer was obvious: you.

You were what had been so special. Carlos' days at Torro Rosso meant that he knew about how you felt towards Albert Park, that it was almost like your home race.

For one, you didn't stay at the Crown Casino hotel like the rest of them. No, instead you stayed at your auntie's place by the beach. Carlos knew that from the time he had to drive a passed out Max Verstappen to said home back in 2017.

Charles' smile dropped slightly. Then he brought it back up. "Ah, you know. The sun, the people. There is a special energy here that - "

He stopped talking.

Carlos knew that his teammate had finally spotted you also. Turning his head to look over at Charles, Carlos took in the look of utter rage on his teammate's face.

And then, you looked up. You noticed him. Them. You met his eyes and then you looked at Charles. The McLaren driver was still talking beside you, oblivious to how you had clearly stopped listening to him. Charles took a deep breath.

He stormed off.

Carlos couldn't help but roll his eyes. He didn't know the truth, but Carlos had heard the many rumours as to why Charles had cut you off. He thought they were all rubbish.

Looking back at you, Carlos met your eyes once more and he thought about his options.

He knew that you were in part responsible for training one of the best drivers on the grid. He also knew that it would take a bit of a miracle to help him outperform Charles Leclerc and show Ferrari what was what.

But hey, if this Oscar kid was going to go against the grid's treasured and unspoken rule, why couldn't he?

You really jinxed yourself.

At first, the Australian Grand Prix was off to a great start. Sleeping at home meant that you had more comfortable waking in a bed that was familiar - and not stuck in some isolating three star hotel room that made you question the hotel rating system.

Three stars with suspicious smells coming from the closet? No, thank you.

Instead, you got to wake up to your auntie humming as she prepared her own version of pancakes. It had been a long time since anyone had made pancakes for you. And even though you had breakfast plans with Oscar and his family, you still ate some of her and kissed her goodbye as you went to the circuit.

By car. You drove yourself. In your beloved Supra, the one that had essentially taught you everything you knew about cars (that and Top Gear) were finally united.

And that in itself was a beautiful fucking thing.

There were a small handful of circuits in where you had a car in the country and could actually drive yourself. Australia was one of them. Japan was another. Monaco was the other.

Then again, Monaco was far too crazy to be driving during a race weekend anyway. Still, it was nice to be able to play some calming lo-fi beats as you drove the familiar Lakeside Drive that led up to the street circuit that was built around the lake. Your lake.

You had found yourself a good parking spot and the cafe vendor recognised you and gave you a free latte. Some marshalls walking by were joking about something nonsensical but the banter and accent made you feel warm inside. No matter the complicated feelings that being Australian brought up, you still enjoyed the laid-back attitudes that came with the softened ds and ts.

You had a good gym session, showing progress with your training. You dropped another kilogram off with the cut working well and then you were ready to go to the safe confined of the McLaren motorhome.

And then you saw the message from your co-worker.

Sorry bro. There's been a change in the roster because Mack called in sick. You're going to be covering him at Ferrari for the rest of the race weekend.

You really had jinxed yourself.

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[writebackatya]

McDuck Family Members Most Likely to Start Sh*t at Thanksgiving Dinner

Ah Thanksgiving. The holiday celebrated on the 4th Thursday of November (in America that is), one with food, family, and celebrating what we’re thankful for! (Wanna feel bad? Learn about the holiday’s origins!)

And no family is quite as big as the found family from DuckTales; so arguments are bound to happen at a dinner table filled with so many zany characters with interesting pasts and quirks. Let’s honor those who would throw the first punch at a family dinner, shall we?

Bentina Beakley

I wanna cut Beakley some slack. She most likely had a long day before dinner even started what with all the preparations she did for dinner. Not just cooking for 20+ family members plus other side/recurring characters but also the cleaning and presentation

But let’s face it. This woman can be so condescending at times. And judgmental. You just know if someone is showing up to dinner wearing jeans and sweater she’d have something to say about it. And she strikes me as someone who would slam the dishes while cleaning them only for someone to say, “Hey Beakley do you need help with the dishes?” and then she’d be like “No. It’s fine. I got them”

But it’s not fine. Go help her with the dishes. She deserves a break

Dewey Duck

When I was first thinking about this list I originally thought “No way any of the triplets would start anything on Thanksgiving” Huey is a good boy and Louie would definitely take it easy on a day where you’re legally allowed to sit around, be lazy, and eat food. But then I remembered Dewey and how much of a diva he can be

We know Dewey is an entertainer and with everyone coming to dinner, he has a huge “captive” audience that he can perform for. Whether it be an original Thanksgiving song, a one man Dewey show about the first Thanksgiving, a sonnet about a bonnet, or a very special Thanksgiving episode of Dewey Dew-Night; that kid will want all the attention in him. And the very second the spotlight is taken off, oh boy…

Gladstone Gander

Look at this prick. Don’t you wanna slap his face!?!Anyway I love Gladstone Gander, but he’s the kind of family member that just would go on and on about himself and bring every conversation back to him again and how great his life is

That’s great Gladstone. Happy for you, the rest of us have to pay for our sushi but cool. Glad your good luck is really paying off, jerk

But honestly. It’s his tone. It’s the kind of tone that gives off that he knows he’s starting shit but won’t admit it

Goldie O’Gilt

I mean, it’s Goldie. What else can I say?

Gandra Dee

Oh man. There’s so many different ways controversy would start with this morally gray ex-FOWL agent and I’m here for it. Let’s face it, out of all the characters present, Gandra Dee would most likely be the one to bring up the holiday’s horrible origins. If anyone is making it their duty to make a rich white family uncomfortable on Thanksgiving, it’s Gandra Dee

She’d get political and even directly ask Scrooge who exactly he voted for in the past two Presidential elections (he claims to be progressive, but he’s still the richest duck in the world. Just how many tax cuts is this man getting to keep that status?)

Oh and what about the treatment of her overwork and underpaid boyfriend? Why is he still working in the bathroom?

Oddly enough, I can see her and Scrooge bonding over a mutual disdain for Gladstone Gander. What a prick

Kit Cloudkicker

It’s not that exactly what Kit does that’ll start a fight, but what he doesn’t do.

Kit is the kinda guy that was supposed to bring a dessert but totally forgot to pick something up from the bakery so instead he’s stopping at the gas station on the way to dinner to pick up some Twinkies

Kit is the kinda guy that would “take a walk” before dinner and not do anything to hide the scent and now all the kids are wondering how a skunk got inside

Gyro Gearloose

It’s Gyro. Something is bound to piss him off at some point

Doofus Drake

I am so tired of the fandom not including Doofus in this found family (Louie and him made up and are friends now and BOYD is his brother, sorry it’s canon) so he’s here on the list

But he’s still a new addition to this family. And a weirdo and a rich brat with a lot of issues that someone should seriously help him with. He’s gonna make everyone uncomfortable. Is it intentional? Or is he just being Doofus? Who knows

What I do know is this, don’t eat the dish he brought.

Della, Donald, and Scrooge!

The original three!

These three are responsible for splitting up the family in the first place so it’s no surprise that they’re number one on this list!!

Yes they’ve squashed their beef with one another and moved past the Spear of Selene, but they are still themselves

The ones most likely to start shit over the dumbest things

These three are going to be bickering over who should carve the turkey. And the argument will be so loud and hectic that no one will question why a bunch of birds are eating a turkey

Anyway, hope you enjoyed this list. It wasn’t meant to slander any characters, just did it for fun. Happy Thursday everyone.

[goodlucktai]

if you’re taking suggestions for the leosagi series you wrote - maybe leo with champion when shes a little older being a menace? or just leo and yui on a date. idk whatever u want :)))

read on ao3

x

At first, Yuichi didn’t know why Leonardo was so annoyed about his family crashing their dates. The Hamato siblings were fun to be around and folded Yuichi into their shenanigans as though it cost them nothing to include him. And it was always worthwhile to see Leonardo in his natural habitat—those sweet and silly and childish sides of him that only came out of their shell at home—so he never minded when he drove down to the lair to visit Leonardo and their time together was never time alone together. 

Then Leonardo came over to Yuichi’s house to watch a movie and Yuichi’s cousins invited themselves into the den and each made it their life’s mission to make Yuichi wish he was an only child. Leonardo thought they were hilarious and encouraged their antics like the troublemaker he was but Yuichi firmly resolved to never laugh at him for complaining about his brothers ever again. 

“We should go out sometime,” Yuichi said pointedly, staring very hard at the unrepentant little fluffy faces peeking at him from the porch windows. “We could get dinner. Or go skating. Or vandalize public property. I’m not picky.”

“Or all of the above!” Leonardo chimed brightly, the blue light of a portal flickering playfully behind him. He squeezed Yuichi’s hands and added, “I like the way you think, Snowball. Let me know when you’re off work on Friday and I’ll come steal you from tío.” 

He leaned in like he was thinking about going for a kiss, then seemed to remember they had an audience and backed off again with a nervous giggle. 

Goddammit, Yuichi thought with feeling. The constant scrutiny was actually ruining his entire life. 

So that’s how they end up here; Yuichi has his bike helmet tucked under one arm, watching with amusement as his boyfriend stands in front of his assembled family and lays down the law. 

“One last time: what are you not going to do,” Leonardo says in a no-nonsense tone, arms folded across his plastron, borrowed purple bomber jacket glittering where the living room lights hit the sequins. He’s unfairly cute. 

“Stalk, supervise or spy,” his siblings recite with varying levels of agreeableness. 

“And what will happen if I catch any of you doing any of those things?”

“You’ll portal our favorite belongings into the ocean.”

“And I will catch you,” Leonardo adds dangerously. “My phone is on, I’m sharing my location, I’ll be with Yui the entire time, and we probably won’t do anything crazier than trying that new Greek restaurant on 9th Ave.”

“You’d try Gyros Stop without us?” Michelangelo demands with a look of absolute betrayal and wet, shiny eyes. Yuichi honestly can’t tell if he’s kidding or not, but Leonardo is completely unmoved.

“Pushing your luck, Miguel. I’ll bring back baklava.”

The crocodile tears dry right up. One camera shutter sound later, Leonardo is staring at Casey and Casey is staring at the floor, new phone clutched guiltily to his chest. 

“I promised April I’d get a picture,” he whispers.

“If you go into the settings you can turn the sound effect off for next time,” Donnie says, leaning over his nephew’s shoulder.

“Next time?” Leonardo all but shrieks.

“Hey, so you two should get going, huh?” Raphael interjects quickly—probably because he can sense the situation rapidly deteriorating by the second. “Have a good time! Tell Raph all about it later!”

Yuichi and Leonardo finally make it past the turnstiles with only a few more dramatics for the road, hopping down into the tunnel where Yuichi’s bike is waiting while Splinter’s pointed reminder of the curfew for little turtles echoes boomingly around them. 

Said little turtle looks seconds away from dying of mortification and busies himself with shoving his helmet on and pretending his father isn’t still talking about what he’ll do if ‘my Baby Blue comes home with even a single scratch!’

“Get me out of here before I do something drastic,” Leonardo grits out. 

Yuichi pulls his own helmet on and slings a leg over his bike. He twists around and pats the seat behind him, smiling. 

“I’ll go real fast, Stripes. Just hang on tight.”

He knows for a fact that the Hamato brothers have motorcycles that Donatello built from the ground up, and that even little Michelangelo can outdrive people three times his age. And Yuichi has floated the idea of Leonardo coming down to the Hidden City on one of the shell hogs so they could have a drag race with Kitsune and Chizu, which Leonardo agreed instantly was the best idea he’d ever had. 

But for now it makes sense to share Yuichi’s bike. It's date night! And it feels like Yuichi is literally the king of the entire universe when Leonardo wraps his arms snug around Yuichi’s middle and props his chin on Yuichi’s shoulder, knocking their helmets together playfully. 

There’s another camera shutter sound behind them, and Leonardo whips around like he’s going to surrender to the Cain Instinct once and for all. Biting back a bark of laughter, Yuichi revs the engine really loud and takes off. 

It’s late and the sky is overcast, which means that when they turn onto the street from the underground it’s to a smear of headlights and bright neon signs and glowing storefront windows.   

None of the Hamatos seem particularly interested in Cloaking Brooches, beyond the single time Yuichi heard them curiously pondering what their human forms would look like while they were waiting on the popcorn in the microwave. Brooches aren’t particularly hard to come by, and Yuichi knows for a fact that there are a bunch in a drawer at home somewhere, but when he offered to bring over a few, he got a round of “nahh”s.

“Embrace the turtle, baby,” cheerful Michelangelo piped up.  

“Maybe pops would want one,” Raphael added thoughtfully. “We’ll have to ask.”

“It’s New York,” Donatello explained, since Yuichi probably looked as confused as he felt. “No one pays attention to anybody else. At best, the humans won’t even notice we look weird because they’ve got their own stuff going on. At worst, they will notice and automatically assume we’re in costume and not care why. What a town.”

So when they pull into a drive thru for smoothies, Leonardo just says, “Leave your helmet on, they won’t say anything,” proving it when he leans over to pay for their drinks with his phone and his sleeve rides up past his wrist. The teenage cashier clocks his green skin, visibly decides she’s not paid enough to care, and smiles at them brightly when Leonardo tips 25%. 

The Hamatos have lived in—or beneath—Midtown their entire lives, so Yuichi is comfortable deferring to their experience. He doesn’t think he’ll tell Auntie, though. 

They wind up at a little park with a wooded waterfront area, almost entirely empty due to the threat of rain. There’s one dim, buzzing streetlight that offers a warm orange glow against the tree coverage and overcast sky, so the two of them gravitate that way. 

Yuichi can see a few other people on the walk path, all the way down at the other side of the park, looking as though they’re making their way out.  

“There’s so many people in every corner of this town but you still manage to find little pockets like this where nobody’s around,” Yuichi says. “It seems impossible.”

“The Hidden City is like that, too,” Leonardo says, hopping up to sit on the railing that separates the greenery from the water. “Every time you take me to one of your secret hangout spots I’m like, ‘Wait, there’s a billion yokai half a street over, how is it just the two of us here?’” 

Yuichi laughs and says, “That’s fair. Did you get pineapple-banana this time? Let me try.”

“You gotta branch away from strawberries and cream, there’s a whole world out there,” Leonardo complains, but gamely switches smoothies anyway. 

Hanging out just the two of them takes much the same shape as it does when they hang out at the farm or the lair. They talk and watch videos on their phones and recreate TikTok dances they’ll never post but save anyway. The only big differences are the ambient noises of the city—traffic and sirens and music and humanity—and the lights on the water behind Leonardo that frame him like a movie scene. 

And also that there’s no nosy siblings to get in the way when Yuichi leans in for a kiss. He does exactly that, mirroring Leonardo’s smile, when suddenly his boyfriend’s gaze cuts to something over his shoulder and he goes through the five stages of grief in rapid-fire. 

“Pizza Supreme,” the slider mutters, letting his forehead bump against Yuichi’s in defeat. “Gram-gram’s laughing at me, I know she is. I mean it’s free entertainment at this point.”

“What?” Yuichi says, turning around. “What did you see?”

“My all-time least favorite B-list bad guys, probably up to their same old stupid tricks.” Leonardo puts his hands on Yuichi’s shoulders to guide him out of the way as he hops down from the railing. His attitude has cooled slightly, a gleam entering his eyes that wouldn’t look out of place in Donatello’s. Which definitely means trouble. “Hey, morons!” he calls. “Stop trying to out-ninja me, I’m so far out of your league it’s actually insane!”

There’s a beat of silence, less than a handful of seconds, and then a dozen humans in dark clothing reveal themselves. Yuichi spends a lot of time with a ninja clan these days and still finds it a little unnerving the way they can spill out of the shadows soundlessly. Even Leonardo and his siblings, with all their bright colors and larger-than-life personalities, can disappear into thin air like it’s nothing. 

These ninja wear hooded cowls with a burnt orange emblem that give away exactly who they are.

Yuichi’s hand goes to Edgewing, belted at his hip. He knows exactly who to blame for the Krang invading New York City—and ultimately for the battle scars Leonardo and his brothers all bear as a result. He only has to take one look at the healed gashes that stand out stark white against the pretty blue of Leonardo’s carapace and it’s enough to make him want to start breaking faces with an eagerness Karasu-Tengu-sensei would disapprove of. 

“Can we please just cut to the chase here?” Leonardo says, hands on his hips. “I’m a busy guy, and frankly, you picked the wrong night.”

At the beginning of the evening, the only solid plans on Yuichi’s itinerary had been dinner and driving around really fast to hear Leonardo whoop in his ear and maybe going to that drive-in movie theater in Brooklyn the turtles loved because it was screening the original Jurassic Park trilogy this weekend and Yuichi had only seen the first one. 

Maybe he should have been surprised to end up engaged in a sword fight with his boyfriend’s hereditary enemy in a cute postal-stamp sized park in Manhattan, but he’s not, really. Part of running with the Hamato clan is learning really early on how to roll with the punches. 

And—he’s taking some mean glee in this. Sue him. When he slams the hilt of Edgewing into a cowled face and hears the crunch of cartilage he goes, “Ha,” under his breath, and only feels guilty for a second about what sensei would have to say about it. 

“Aren’t you guys embarrassed?” Leonardo calls out to the gaggle of Foot ninja he’s fighting, sounding more annoyed than anything else. “All of your overlords either leave you for dead or sick a squishy pink brain parasite on you.” He glances at Yuichi and adds, as if he had somehow missed the entire alien invasion earlier in the year and this was his first time hearing about it, “It was a whole thing.”

“You know, I do have the Internet.”

“You have dial-up. I didn’t even know what that was until Donnie Googled it.”

If Yuichi wasn’t already in love with this guy for an embarrassing number of reasons, watching him fight five to one without breaking a sweat definitely would have helped him get there. He doesn’t even need the edge his ninpo gives him; fighting an enemy like the Krang kind of makes everything else seem like small fish in comparison. 

By the time the last ninja has crumpled bonelessly to the ground, Yuichi’s muscles are burning in that pleasant post-workout way. And his mind is completely free of everything except a giddy runner’s high. So when Leonardo tilts a smile at him, already reaching for his abandoned smoothie, Yuichi doesn’t think. 

He just closes those four steps between them, takes Leonardo’s face in both hands, and kisses him. 

It’s perfect, obviously. Even with the sound of a nearby eavesdropper squeaking and then being soundly muffled. 

“Okay,” Leonardo says very calmly, and disappears in a flash of cyan. 

Somewhere in the wooded part of the park, there’s multiple shrieks and the sound of Raphael pleading, “No listen, we weren’t spying I swear we were, uh, we were—” 

“Geocaching,” Donatello fumbles, “what an insane coincidence that it took us here, he lied convincingly. Nardo, you know how susceptible I am to both peer pressure and FOMO—”

“You guys are so cute!” Michelangelo chirps enthusiastically. “Ow! And totally a power couple, you should see the pictures we—Lee, ow, ow, okay, I’m sorry I’m sorry—”

Yuichi sighs, and looks down at the Foot ninja beginning to stir weakly on the ground nearby. 

“I’m so lucky,” he confides in them, the truth of it a warm little star in his heart, and then slides out his phone. 

Donatello added him to the Hamato family plan ages ago, which means he gets service everywhere and data speeds he didn’t even know were possible. Yuichi finds Gyro Stop on GrubHub and places a pick-up order for enough spanakopita and baklava to feed however many of Leonardo’s siblings he decides to leave alive. 

[starzabi]

hey!! a fellow johnny lover omg. do you have any wedding hc's/scenarios for him?

and i love her.

johnny x gn!reader

— johnny gave you the ring shortly before the race started—he planned everything for the date night for it be the most romantic evening of your life with a lovely dinner, bouquets upon bouquets of flowers and he even attempted to rent out an entire restaurant for the both of you. and while the night was enjoyable, he felt incredibly happy when you said “yes”.

— after the race, johnny comes back… different. while he’s always been in a mood, he seems worse even though he can walk now.

— you don’t question him about it though since you respect him and since he always seems to get upset whenever someone mentions the race to him.

— one day, however, he just springs upon you this question after seeing you fiddle with the silver ring he had given you months prior.

‘let’s get married.’

— you’re taken aback by this obviously. you expected him to say many things however you didn’t expect him to say this.

‘let’s get married.’

‘what?’

‘yeah. you and me. right now. at the town’s square—we can plan the party later but i wanna marry you, right here, right now.’

— you honestly have to ask him multiple times whether he’s okay or not and what caused him to suddenly spring this upon you.

— eventually, after long minutes of him insisting upon this, you agree and you swear you can see him smile for the first time since he came back.

— so, there you both are, at the town’s square—patiently waiting in line for your turn to sign the papers and seal the deal.

— while waiting, you anxiously start to play with the ring again, twisting and turning it against your fourth finger.

— johnny picks up on this and it causes him to gently place one of his hands on top of your own and eventually, envelope your hands with his.

— the action causes you to halt all your movements and you stare right at him—this behaviour of his is so different from the johnny you were becoming used to.

‘i love you so much.’

‘i love you too, jojo.’

— to your surprise, after he hears you say those words, he pulls you into a kiss—it feels magical and it reminds you of the first time you both ever touched.

— one of his hands abandon your own and find their way into your hair as he deepens the kiss.

‘i can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you…’ he mumbles against your ear after you both finally pull apart.

— the reception and the following party can wait, right now, he just wants to be with you.

(let’s be real here, gyro would be the best man, lucy the flower girl and diego would be banned from entering but he’d crash the party anyways.)

[kulemiwrites]

NOVEMBER 14: Masato Aizawa

The (No)vember Experiment

What’s the longest you and your dreamboat have gone without getting frisky? Are the two of you constantly teeming with insatiable desire? Can’t keep your hands to yourselves for more than a moment? Depending on your answers to any one of those questions, the idea of going an ENTIRE month without chasing “The Big O” may sound like either a breeze, a curse or a blessing in disguise! Wouldn’t you like to find out which? 

That’s right! We at the KW♥️LOVE offices are challenging our readers and their lovers to a month-long experiment to test their self-restraint! Yes, you read that right– AN ENTIRE MONTH without “The Big O”! Think you can handle it? Rip off the October page of that wall calendar, whip out your favorite marker and get to X’ing off the days until you complete(or forfeit) the NOvember experiment!

We encourage all participants to print out the survey we’ve created for the occasion to fill out and give feedback on your experiences! Keep them for your records in case you participate again next NOvember, discard them when the experiment is over or send them in and we’ll include your feedback in next month’s intimacy column!

[Any submissions will be carefully reviewed by our team. All personal identifiers such as names and unique nicknames will be redacted to ensure the safety and security of our readers before publishing.]

Rating: 18+ Characters: Masato Aizawa & GN! Reader A/N: The idea here is that KW♥️LOVE (Sometimes just KW, and broken into sections) is a fictional version of Cosmopolitan. I was feeling nostalgic over the bygone age of the magazine lol. Surveys are filled out by the character. You determine how the reader would answer their own.)

READ ON A03

Portrait used on calendar is used with permission of the artist @fabylp

When you finished reading the article, the first thing you did was send the link to Masato. After about 20 minutes, you received a string of tan ‘thumbs up’ and ‘flexing’ emojis confirming what you’d already known. It seemed interesting enough but this sort of thing was right up his alley. He’d always had a peculiar interest in assigning himself tests, or “trials” as he liked to call them, to assess his strength and endurance in both the physical sense and the mental.

In a way, he’d already done a version of his ‘no nut’ challenge before. He’d told you about a trial he’d given himself where he went months without any sex or masturbation. 

Months. 

That word seemed to echo in your head.  

His knack for pushing the limits was all fine and dandy but you could help the shiver when you realized what you might have just signed yourself up for. What would you do if he suggested stretching this out for a couple more months. Or the extreme, a year?

In theory, sure, it seemed a little dramatic but you knew what sort of a monster you were up against. What had you just gotten yourself into? 

You stared at his text.

Just a simple line of thumbs and flexing biceps and yet, it felt almost menacing. 

Your train of thought was disrupted by the funky tune you’d assigned to Masato’s contact and instead of a text thread, you were now looking at a picture of your man smiling with a muscular arm wrapped around you as he pressed a kiss to your temple, looking away from the camera.

Any other day, you’d beam at this screen but today, you dreaded swiping the green icon and it was all your own fault. 

“H-Hey, Masato–” you answered. 

“Amorzinho, how are you feeling about Mediterranean for dinner? I’m in the mood for some of those lamb things– gyros! Yeah, lamb gyros sound great right now.”

“Oh, sure… Yeah, that sounds fine.”

“You sure? You don’t sound very happy about it?” Although you couldn’t see him, his tone of voice painted the picture of him perfectly. “We… can get something else. Doesn’t have to be gyros.”

“No,” you chuckle, “no, mediterranean sounds good. Don’t worry.”

There was shuffling on the other line, followed by the sound of a car door shutting and muffled words that you couldn’t make out aside from the word ‘street’. Then, his attention was back to you. 

“Are you not feeling alright or something?”

“Do I really sound that bad or are you just being overprotective?” you said jokingly. You had to wonder if these silly thoughts put that much of a damper on your mood and if so, you needed to get your ass back into gear. 

“Who knows… but, I think we can both say you’re not being yourself,” he said. “Did I fuck up? What day is it today?”

“No, Masato–” you smiled, shaking your head at the fact that now you’ve got the gears in that poor man’s head turning for nothing. “You didn’t do anything. Today’s not important. I think I just sorta bummed myself out a bit.”

You frowned at your own words. It sounded even sillier out loud. 

He urged you to continue. 

“I was just thinking about that article I sent you.”

“The nut November thing, yeah.”

“‘No’ nut November thing,” you corrected. “You know why I sent it, right?”

“‘Cause… you wanna give it a shot?” he seemed to question his own question. 

“I guess, but more like… I know how much you enjoy doing challenges and stuff? So, I had a feeling you’d be interested in trying that one.”

“Well, it’s interesting,” he emphasized, followed by a soft chuckle. “I can give you that.”

You chewed at your lip as you turned over your next sentence in your head and when he asked if you were still there, you finally spit it out. “It’s just that I notice you get a little… intense, when it comes to your ‘trials’. So, the thought of you going overboard made me question if this will be as fun as I thought.”

You were met with one of his airy, boisterous laughs. “That’s all?”

You knew it was a little silly, but for him to laugh like that didn’t help you feel less embarrassed by the words coming out of your own mouth.

“Yes, that's all.” you spat with a tinge more attitude than you intended.

“Listen, amorzinho,” he cleared his throat before continuing. “How about we just forget this? We don’t have to do it.”

“I’m not saying that I don’t want to do it. I just don’t want you going overboard. It’d be fun to try and join one of your trials for once.”

“Got it. No going ‘overboard’.” he said in that amused tone when there’s more than he’s letting on. “You wanna do those slip things, too?”

You shrugged, “Why not? It could be fun to swap in the end and read each other’s answers.”

“What? You mean, you don’t want to send them in and get featured on the romance page of the KW♥️LOVE website?” he teased. 

“Ha, not a chance.”

The cloud hanging over your head seemed to have dissipated and you had to wonder why the hell you allowed yourself to get worked up like that anyway.

The smile in his voice only eased you more, “I’ll download mine tonight then. Get dressed for dinner. I’ll be home soon.”

“See you soon.”

(No)vember Experiment Initial Survey Are both of you participating? Yeah Have you ever practiced abstaining from sex for any period of time before? Yeah Do you believe you are capable of completing this experiment? Yeah Do you believe in your partner(s)’ ability to complete this experiment? Yeah Do you predict a “loser"? None Initial thoughts on the month ahead? I’ve done worse.

The last 13 days have been nothing short of torment and anguish. Not even being chained, beaten and having salt poured into his open wounds could compare to this… 

Alright.

So, he was exaggerating but you had no clue how torturous it was to get through each day pretending that all was well and that he wasn’t dying to screw you into the nearest surface at a moment’s notice. 

You thought him to believe that this would be a walk in the park. You had high hopes for him. He didn’t want to disappoint you. 

Though, truthfully, you had disappointed him when you didn’t lunge at the out he’d given you over the phone that day. He really hoped you’d bite and tell him that you changed your mind. Maybe he should have doubled down when you told him your concern, and suggested that you ramp up the challenge to 90 days instead of 30. 

Maybe then, you’d have dropped it. 

It was hilarious that you truly believed him capable of surviving a month– 30 whole days without a taste of you, without burying himself within you. 

How well did you know him, really?

One truth about Masato was that he was a very physical person. In many cases, he used his hands to communicate what his words and eyes couldn’t. The same whim that led him to violence was the same whim that made him so affectionate.

There wasn’t a single phrase in any known language that could communicate what he felt better than his touch could. 

There was a distinct difference in the way his touch applied to you than it did the rest of the world. As far as he was concerned, your body didn’t know anything beyond his gentleness. If you hadn’t seen him in action, you might have questioned if they were even capable of anything else. 

Day in and day out, it was his mission to show you just how much he appreciated, adored, loved and wanted you. This little game made that increasingly harder because touching you fired him up in more ways than one. 

That’s what made this next truth about Masato all the harder to reconcile. 

He NEVER wanted to do this.

He nearly bit his tongue off that day to keep you from hearing him click it when you confirmed that this was what you wanted. Knowing that you’d chosen it because you thought it would be what he wanted made him want to give himself a good wallop to the head. 

He considered just telling you how he felt but you seemed so thrilled to ‘do a trial’ with him that he couldn’t take that away from you. That, and the fact that you’ve brought up those seven months he’d gone without any form of sexual gratification at least three times now– three!

So, now this was a matter of pride. 

A refusal to lose even to himself. 

However, what he wished you’d understood was that the circumstances in his life then and the circumstances of his life now couldn’t be less identical. That seven months was made possible by willpower, yes but also by the fact that he had much bigger, far more important issues to prioritize and the fact that he was single most certainly helped.

Now, he has you by his side. 

And he loved you. 

And he damn near worshiped that that he loved.

This made him docile. 

Agreeable. 

Too fucking keen to acquiesce. 

This was precisely what his mother, may God rest her poor soul, always warned him about. He was as stubborn as a mule to the outside world but utterly pliant to the object of his affection. 

He was self-aware, at least and since he had that going for him, it was made blatantly apparent that being in love… made him pathetic and Masato didn’t ‘do’ pathetic.

In just 13 days, he’s used every single one of his fingers and toes to tally off the amount of times he’s had to peel himself away from you simply because your warmth alone was enough to make him pop a boner. 

It was mean. 

Agonizing.

He couldn’t treat himself to shower with you or chat casually with you as you got changed. He couldn’t even lie in bed and cuddle with you without having to end it with a chaste kiss to the temple and turn away. At this point, he had no choice but to erect a mental barricade between you– ‘your side’ and ‘his side’, just so that he didn’t wake up in the middle of the night, rutting against your perfect ass like a beast in heat when you inevitably pressed it against him. 

Because you wanted to do this fucking 30 day challenge and you believed in him…

God hadn’t heard from him in over 15 years but he reached out just to ask for the strength to resist groveling at your feet and begging you to end the torment.

He was pathetic. 

In every sense of the word. 

As you joined him in the bedroom tonight, a towel wrapped taut around you with steam still rising from your skin and smelling absolutely divine, he wondered if this patheticness of his had reached its peak. 

For 10 nights now, instead of going commando, he’s worn underwear to bed simply because the sight of you like this alone was enough to make him pitch a tent beneath the comforter. Tucking himself beneath the waistband always offered him the false sense of security that he needed. 

Tonight though, the moment his cock began to beat against his thigh simply from the whiff of you, he wasn’t so sure he’d survive the night.

“Masato,” no one ever uttered that name as beautifully as you. “Think we can cuddle a bit tonight. Sleeping so far apart has started to feel a little lonely.” 

And now he was certain that he wouldn’t.

You didn’t have to go a second without his arm around you after you finally sank into bed. He had you as flush to his body as he could without impaling you on his cock– so fucking rock hard tonight it was painful to the touch. It took a little awkward maneuvering but he seemed to manage okay.

Though, having you this close to him, smelling so good, being so warm, made every dirty thought he’s had involving you the last 13 days and 12 nights swarm his mind in a frenzy. It was beginning to disrupt his breathing. He was certain that you could feel his pulse pounding in his chest, in his fingertips.

The smart thing to have done in this situation would have been to whisper his well wishes for you good night’s sleep and then respect the mental barricade. 

His side. 

Your side. 

Your shoulder peeked out beneath the comforter in a way that was so inviting that he couldn’t help but press a lingering kiss to it. 

His side. 

Your side. 

And then another.

His side. 

Your side. 

He pressed another for good measure and his ears perked at the sound of a soft moan coming from you. Surely that wasn’t right… Now he was hearing things. 

Masato had begun to retract his arm so that he could turn to his side and grip the base of his cock as if he intended to choke it to death but then he heard an even sweeter sound pass through those lips. 

“Again, please.”

To beg him so pitifully, as if he’d ever allow himself to deny you– as if he were anything but dutiful to you– 

When he pressed his lips to your warm skin again, you treated him to even more of your beautiful music then shattered the barricade so that your ass was flush to his groin.

Masato spoke your name in warning but was immediately cut down by a sharp hiss and he knew not to speak another word. His fingers were all but burrowing themselves into your belly as your ass brushed his clothed erection in a desperation unlike anything he’d ever witnessed in you. 

You craned your head and reached around for him, drawing him in close in silent request of a kiss and because he was so acquiescent, he felt he had no choice but to oblige. The words you spoke against his lips stole all the air from his lungs that he’d have willingly given you anyway. 

“If we… stopped at just the tip, we could still win the game, right?” you panted and your hips did not take a moment of respite.

As far as he was concerned, this was your game and he played by your rules. For you and only you, he was an ardent rule follower. 

So, once those rules suddenly demanded that he plunged all 8 and a half inches into you until he filled you with 13 days worth of cum? 

Well…

(No)vember Experiment CONCLUSION SURVEY Experiment duration? 13 days Did this challenge meet your expectations? ___ is happy so I’m fine with it. Did you notice anything different about your partner during this time? Not really. I always knew that ___ was too good to stay away from. Will you participate in the (NO)vember Experiment again next year? Ha Any closing remarks on your experience? I’m choosing the trial next time

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[jake-kiszkas-smirk]

If you’re still doing them, can I request a Sam and Jake blurb? Doesn’t have to be intimate but just hanging out with them and like dating one and being besties with the other and maybe some cute comforting things thrown in like hugs and forehead/temple kisses and stuff? 🥹💖

This is adorable of course I can,

“That’s not historically accurate at all.” Sam complained about something on the tv. He was currently sitting on the floor between your legs in his sweats and a tshirt as you braided his hair.

“Sammy this is a movie, not a documentary” you replied as you secured a band around the first braid.

You looked up as you heard keys outside your front door.

“Babe, I’m home!” You heard Jake as he slipped his shoes off,

“Hey love, I’m in the living room” you shouted back, combing your fingers through Sams hair to get out all the tangles.

“How was your-“ Jake paused as he rounded the corner, his eyes landing on Sam “don’t you ever go home? You’re here more than I am. And this is my house!” he said in a faux annoyed tone as he walked over and kissed your forehead.

“Not my fault you decided to date my best friend” he shrugged as he reached for the remote to turn up the tv to drown out Jakes talking over it.

“I’m going to change the locks” Jake teased as he nudged Sam with his foot to scoot over a little so he could get next to you on the couch, giving you a hug before relaxing back,

“She’d just let me in anyways,” Sam retorted

Jake shot you a playful glare and you shook your head out of Sams eyesight. Jake laughed softly,

“What do you want for dinner?” He asked you, sitting back against the couch and rubbing your back as you started Sams second braid

“Oh, I love that Greek place down the road...they have the best-“ Sam started and you giggled as Jake leaned forward and smacked him “Hey!” Sam grabbed the back of his head and glared at Jake

“I’m talking to her not you” Jake laughed as he sat back against the couch, dodging Sams retaliation hit

“Sammy be still!”

“Kinda hard when I’m being assaulted by your sweet Jakey” he rolled his eyes and faced the tv once again.

“Greek does sound good though...” you whispered to Jake,

“It does” Jake leaned over and pressed a kiss to your cheek,

“I heard that, I want a gyro” Sam said as you secured the second braid with a hair tie.

“Ugh fine” Jake groaned, “but you’re going to pick it up.”

“Deal” Sam said as he took out his phone, taking down everyone’s orders and then heading out the door.

“Y/n, do you want that soda you like as well?” He came back in the door to ask,

“Yes please!” You chirped as he put it in his phone and then walked out.

“Sometimes I think he knows you better than I do” Jake said as he laid across the couch, head in your lap as you now played with his hair.

“I don’t think so,” you reassured your boyfriend, “but to be fair, he’s known me longer. Also, there are some ways you know me that he never will” you grinned as you wiggles your eyebrows

Jake smiled then, “That’s true. I’ll catch up on the other little things eventually” he sighed, letting his eyes close. “Why couldn’t you have been friends with Ronnie, she’s less annoying”

You giggled as you continued to run your fingers through his hair. The both of you shared how you’re day had been, and when Sam returned you all enjoyed your food while chatting and teasing each other incessantly. These were the night you loved, your best friend and your boyfriend both here, making you laugh until your sides hurt.

[retlasute]

॰ In The Rich Man's World ॰

Word count: 7800

☆ Table of contents

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Chapter 19 - Lead Me On

"You can leave your horses with Peter, don't worry.'' Stephen assured you after you reached your destination, although you weren't too worried about where you would leave Judas - if this Peter wasn't mentioned, you would just leave the horse where it was. 

The Steel house stood in front of you, a beautiful building, large and noticeably well ventilated and well lit. You crossed the lawn, ignoring the stares of several servants, gathered at the upper floor windows, pointing at you and whispering among themselves. 

"Please, come in.'' Lucy said, a little nervously. ''A good chat before dinner is ready would be great, wouldn't it?'' 

''Ah, Lucy, I'm afraid I can't come in now.'' Said Stephen, pausing for a moment to brush some leaves off his shoulders. "I told you I had a conference, didn't I?'' 

She paused for a few seconds, as if she hadn't forgotten the information. Gently, one of her hands touched the other in an involuntary gesture, and she smiled. 

"Ah, how could I forget?" She said sweetly. "But you're coming for dinner, aren't you?" 

"Of course.'' He said humorously, but without smiling, looking at Gyro and Johnny. ''Please, make yourselves at home. We have a lot to talk about over dinner, right?'' 

You had the strange sensation of being in the background, of being just an omnipresent viewer. And visible, of course, you thought as you stared at the bustling shapes in the second-floor windows, pointing and whispering at you and Louise. How many servants were there in that house? It wasn't an easy question to answer now, but you had the impression that this would be important information. 

And speaking of important information, you were deeply annoyed by everyone there. They seemed to be talking in code; Stephen's passive air, combined with his slightly grim expression disguised by a sympathetic radio announcer's voice, gave you the impression that he wasn't entirely happy with Gyro and Johnny's presence; at least, not as much as his wife. In a normal situation, if you didn't know them, you'd think they were Lucy's lovers judging by the constant exchange of glances; however, those glances weren't - thank God! - in any way lustful. 

The house was isolated, but not completely. You could tell that there were neighbors, however distant, on the outskirts. It was a plain surrounded by a coastal forest, the beach not far away. However, everything was silent when Stephen left, the air still and heavy. Even the birds were silent, with only the occasional peck of a woodpecker breaking the silence. 

When the horseman took Judas with the other horses, after preparing the horses of Stephen's carriage to set off again, you quickly unzipped your saddle bag. It contained nothing but files and your flashlight; but that, faced with the prospect of having a difficult conversation with Lucy about corpses and time travel, seemed useful enough. 

You intended to tell her, of course. But not the moment you arrived. You wanted her to get used to you and Louise first. 

"Please, follow me.'' Lucy said after waving to her husband. Her voice didn't change at any point, but she sounded subtly stern. 

You hesitated for a moment, turning to watch Gyro and Johnny and doing something only after seeing them do it. Their jaws seemed clenched with tension and they both loomed behind you like two Colossi of Rhodes . Lucy was waiting on the front porch of the house, the door already open and the horses already following the sun- and salt-burnt young Peter, who had greeted you too briefly. 

Gyro had also hesitated, you could see that, apparently foreseeing what was to come inside that house, but the combined forces of pity, boredom and exile had brought him to Staten Island and walking through that door would be the least of his worries. 

Then she led her unexpected guests through the house, ignoring the few surprised servants that passed, crossing the entrance and a small room, with paintings and memorials that you didn't have time to read who they belonged to, but there were many names. The living room boasted a fireplace with a well-polished console, silver and glass objects shone here and there, reflecting the late afternoon sun. 

"A nice house, huh?'' Gyro commented, more bothered by the silence than the others. ''How long have you been here?'' 

''A few months.'' She replied. ''There's still a lot to do. I'm tired of going into town every time we need something, so we're working on the animal enclosures and an area for the vegetable garden." 

"How far are we from this town?'' Johnny asked, sitting down on the arm of an armchair when he realized they were no longer walking around the house. 

"About twenty minutes on horseback.'' Lucy smiled briefly at the thought. "When we're not carrying chickens and goats, of course.'' 

Listening to such an unrelated and casual conversation, not knowing any of the people and feeling like a complete intruder, your first impulse had been to turn and walk away, but there would be no explanation or reason for that. Louise gave you the message, noticing that Lucy was watching you, her eyes calm and confused. You also noticed the silent communication between Gyro and Johnny, an invisible vibration in the air, as if they were two beads on the same string. 

"You look tired. It's been a long trip, hasn't it?'' 

You looked at her, surprised by the sudden interaction. 

"Yes...'' You said, pragmatically. ''Yes, it was quite a long trip. Louise and I came all the way from Washington.'' 

She raised her eyebrows, politely interested and ready to say something, until Gyro intervened. 

"And I came from another continent.'' He said. "The trip was especially long for me.'' 

''Oh, it's true!'' Lucy said, remembering that Gyro is Italian. As if it were even possible to forget that. ''How long have you been here, mister Zeppeli?'' 

"You can call me Gyro, missy.'' He said sympathetically, perhaps a little surprised at the formality. ''A week ago, I think. As soon as I landed, Johnny already threw a ton of tasks at me.'' 

''You say that like you did it all by yourself.'' Johnny defended himself. ''It was you who asked for more things to do.'' 

''Of course, of course. I've been bored for a long time.'' He said, patting one of the steel balls in his holster. ''Can you imagine, Lucy? Almost two years without breaking someone's face with those steel balls.'' 

''Sounds awful.'' She said casually, enjoying the moment. 

The house was spacious and airy inside, with high ceilings and French doors, but at the same time it didn't look so formal. It was furnished with comfortable elegance, but there were a few paintings and subtle handicrafts that gave it a touch of sweet home. You saw pieces of silver and crystal when you passed the dining room and thought that, apparently, Stephen Steel was very successful in whatever his current line of work was. 

"Can I get you something to drink?'' She asked when she saw from the other side that a maid was approaching with a pot of tea and just one cup, clearly not expecting visitors. ''I usually drink chamomile tea every afternoon before studying, it's great for concentration.'' 

"Oh, so you're studying?'' Gyro asked amiably. 

''Yes, I'm doing the best I can.'' She said mildly, looking at the silver tray the maid had placed on the table. ''Thank you. Can you get them something to drink?'' 

The woman looked ready to answer, when Johnny interrupted her. 

"Actually, Lucy, we can skip that, can't we?'' He suggested, clearly anxious. "We have more pressing matters.'' 

Gyro, however, didn't seem to agree with Johnny's haste, but he didn't intervene. 

Lucy's delicate, chronic smile wilted a little at the sudden break in pleasantries, so she dismissed the maid with a sympathetic nod. 

"Oh, yes, of course... I understand.'' 

Lucy asked them to accompany her, and this took you to a private room not far from the kitchen, smaller and more intimate, with the same amount of furniture as the larger rooms, but with homely touches among the brightness of the polished furniture and decorations. There was a large wicker basket full of skeins on a small polished wooden table, next to a glass vase with summer flowers and a small, silver, decorated bell. A spinning wheel was spinning alone and slowly in the breeze that came in through the open French doors. 

It was then, before entering, that Lucy stopped, somewhat confused. 

"I'm sorry for the rudeness.'' She said, turning to you and Louise. "But I don't know if mister Zeppeli and mister Joestar would like to talk about it so openly...'' 

Rudeness , you thought ironically when you heard her call Gyro and Johnny mister Zeppeli and mister Joestar . Then you looked at them; Gyro was distracted, gawking as he observed every corner of the house, clearly amused by the idea of dinner. Johnny seemed more focused, although you could see in his frown that nothing seemed more urgent to him than a bath, yet he still seemed to understand the gravity of the situation. 

"Don't worry, Lucy.'' Johnny said. ''They can be part of the conversation more than Gyro and I.'' 

Lucy hesitated and looked at you with friendly suspicion, then waited for everyone to enter. The house and all the furnishings looked simpler than Stephen and Lucy actually were, but it was all very well looked after, beautiful and organized with more than just good taste. You realized what was behind the elegant proportions and graceful decorations when Gyro stopped abruptly next to a large blackboard on the wall. 

"Damn, Lucy.'' He said, turning to her. "Do you really need to study all this?'' 

You thought you saw her expression turn somber, but she soon smiled again, not too blatantly . You could see what he was talking about: equations and functions; all relatively simple, but which aroused laziness and a bad shiver when you remembered high school. You doubted that Gyro had gone through an educational system similar to yours and Louise's, but you knew that the Zeppeli family had a good familiarity with trigonometry and numerical sequences such as Fibonacci’s. 

"Yes. Stephen says I need to focus on my education before I decide to live as a housewife forever." 

That room looked like a general study area; gently adapted for some craft activities, but mostly planned for Lucy's studies. Stephen seemed too sensible a man for the time; perhaps he had more of a sense of how much time he had left than Lucy and feared that she wouldn't find another husband like him. 

"If you're here, I imagine you've read my letter.'' She said seriously, then looked at you and Louise. "All of you. I didn't think you'd come so quickly.'' 

''We were already on our way to Manhattan, actually. Then I got the letter at Stafford station and saw your new address.'' Johnny explained. 

Lucy widened her eyes, somewhat puzzled. 

''You were already on your way? Why?'' 

Johnny looked at you, as if asking for some kind of confirmation to proceed, and you gave it, albeit terrified. He took a step in front of Lucy and, not knowing exactly where he had been guarding, you saw him hold out his hand and show her one of the corpse's eyes. 

You realized how frightened she was when you saw her, in a jolt, recoil at the sight of the corpse's eye. That didn't sound like something she would want to come into direct contact with again and you could completely understand why; but what you couldn't understand was why Johnny and Gyro would resign such a task of protecting the corpse to a girl like her. But you figured, then, that as oblivious as he was, Stephen probably knows or usually takes sides in this matter - but if so, why did she ask you not to mention it around him? 

Gyro and Louise exchanged glances that made it clear that this was precisely what they were thinking. 

"What? But... no... how?'' She began to stammer, her voice shaky as if she wasn't as ready to broach this subject as she imagined. ''How did you find it?'' 

''I didn't.'' Johnny said harshly, and then the eyes in the room fell on you and Louise. Lucy no longer looked as friendly as before, just a frightened mouse. 

''Who are you? Why...'' She began, not taking her eyes off you. 

''Oh... right. I guess I need to do this again...'' You said, looking for somewhere to sit, deciding to lean on a table next to the blackboard that Gyro had stopped looking at. 

You took a deep breath, with a long, shuddering sigh, and pursed your lips, until you thought you could speak calmly, hoping that somehow Louise would help you this time. 

"Louise and I work... we used to work at the Speedwagon Foundation, I'm sure you know it. I was an archaeologist, and she...'' 

"Human resources sector.'' She added, signaling that she would help you, leaning on the arm of an armchair on the other side of the room. ''Technically I was the second person to find the corpse... well, outside the bunker or wherever you hid it.'' 

Lucy's eyes lit up, completely unaware of what was to come. 

"Did you find it? Was it with someone? Where, exactly?'' She began her questions, much more impatient than when it had been Gyro and Johnny's turn. 

"In New Jersey.'' Louise continued calmly, signaling Lucy to remain calm as well. ''But we used to work in Washington DC.'' 

''Washington? That doesn't make sense. How did they find the corpse in New Jersey?'' 

Louise remained silent, pursing her lips and staring at you. You were grinding your teeth now, to the detriment of a new filling. Then you stopped and moistened your dry lips. 

"Listen, Lucy.'' You said, as sensibly as possible, although saying her name made your throat tickle. ''I'm sorry, but this story is much more confusing than you think, I know how it sounds. But we're going to tell the truth and after that there's nothing I can do about it for now.'' 

This speech did nothing to restore Lucy's confidence, and she moved closer to Johnny. He, however, had lost his dispassionate tone and showed signs of cautious interest as he listened to the story being told again, but in a more coherent and calm manner. Was it possible that he really had enough imagination to be able to understand everything this time? 

You drew hope from his face and opened your clenched fists. 

''It's that damn place. Devil's Palm.'' You said. "You know, the crater with the circle of claw-shaped stones?'' 

"Devil's Palm... yes.'' Lucy murmured. ''The one in the Arizona desert?'' 

''Right. Yes.'' You let out a loud breath. ''But that place hasn't passed through Arizona for many decades... I mean... two years, at least. But you must know the legends about this place, right? About people who gain mysterious powers, become delirious, become serial killers... get trapped and wake up in the last century?'' 

Lucy looked increasingly alarmed. 

''I can't understand it. Yes, I know that place, I saw a horrible murder that happened there with my own eyes, during the Steel Ball Run. But where are you going with this?'' 

''I'm saying that, well, this thing moves. But not only that. It was in New Jersey.'' 

''You don't have to tell her everything, (Y/N).'' Gyro interrupted, looking more worried than bored. ''It might just end up making her more confused.'' 

''No, wait.'' Johnny said. He looked at you, with the kind of repressed curiosity that a scientist shows when he puts a new slide under the microscope. ''Go on, (Y/N), you're doing fine.'' 

"Thank you.'' You said dryly. ''Don't worry, I'm not going to start talking bullshit; I just thought Lucy would like to know that there is a real basis to the legends. I have no idea what's really in this crater, only how it works, but the fact is...'' You took a deep breath. ''Louise and the research team found the corpse in the Devil's Palm, in an isolated forest, and took it to Washington so that my team and I could study it.'' 

"You're telling me... that the corpse is in Washington, then?'' She swallowed dryly. 

"No. It's not.'' You continued, with frightening calm. ''I was head of research for the Ecclesiastes project, you recognize that name, don't you? The fact is that we can't say who took the corpse out of the bunker, and we can't even say that Louise found the corpse... because that hasn't happened yet. It won't happen until 1976.'' 

And there was the poor thing, paralyzed, frowning, unable to understand a single word. You'd have thought she'd react like that; but if she could solve high school equations, she could handle two time travelers, couldn't she? 

''1976? I... I don't understand... what are you saying?'' 

"Louise and I stole the corpse from the lab in Washington.'' You explained slowly. ''Then we went back to New Jersey, because the crown of thorns wasn't sent with the rest of the corpse; it stayed with the other research team. But we also knew that the Devil's Palm was still there; we had the technology to know that and we completed the corpse there, on top of the Devil's Palm, and waited for dawn to leave." 

"We didn't intend to come back.'' Louise added what she thought was necessary. ''(Y/N) talked about some competitors of the Speedwagon Foundation who would pay a fortune for the corpse, so we decided to try our luck. Anything was better than going back.'' 

''Yes.'' You confirmed. ''And at some point we slept there, and somehow went through a damn time rift in Devil's Palm in 1976 and woke up in the same place, but in 1892.'' 

It was almost exactly what you had said to Gyro and Johnny. They stared at you, perplexed, for a moment, and then gave up trying to understand or question. They simply accepted it. 

You could see in those round, terrified blue eyes that Lucy didn't doubt your story one bit; on the contrary, it seemed to make more sense than it did to Johnny or Gyro, but you sensed that some rational side of her mind naturally rose to question it. 

Gyro, Johnny and even you were looking at Louise now; all aware that the story followed the path of the corpse. 

"I woke up first, I didn't notice anything different.'' Understanding that it was her cue, she continued. ''Except that the research team's tents were no longer there; but the corpse was, and that's what mattered. I picked it up and put it in the same box we brought it in and... Ha, well, I must have missed the eye. It's (Y/N) who's paid to be careful with mummies and corpses, not me.'' She added, in an effort to make fun. She wasn't very successful; Lucy's face contorted into a grimace and she looked more worried than ever. ''The first person I came across was a thief. Or two, maybe. The point is that I believe that in this day and age young women don't walk around unescorted and, if they do, it's not wearing t-shirts and carrying a shiny plastic box. This somehow made them see that there was something wrong with me. Luckily I was far enough away for them not to see (Y/N).'' 

Luckily? You thought remorsefully. 

''They thought twice before deciding to kill me, so they just decided to capture me and show me off to their leader. After that, I thought that my physical integrity was a priority before recovering the corpse, so I didn't bother to find out what happened to it.'' 

"The leader in question...'' Johnny decided to add, his voice startling Louise. "It's Joshua Creed.'' He said, and a slight shudder went through Louise at the memory of that name. ''I was there, I found their camp and I was about to capture him...'' 

He looked at you and you gave a slightly complacent smile, already understanding how inconvenient your arrival had been. 

"Until I showed up and ruined your plans.'' You added. ''Well, it was too much of a coincidence, it wasn't my fault.'' 

''Joshua Creed? I feel like I've heard that name before. What... what did he look like?'' Lucy seemed to come out of her stupor, at least slightly. 

"A fucking pervert.'' Louise answered immediately, feeling more able to talk about it. Lucy's eyes widened and turned to Johnny with an identical look of dismay. 

"A pervert, linked to Dio.'' Johnny added again, triggering some immediate memory in Lucy that made her expression soften in understanding. "Do you know him, Lucy?'' 

She immediately pulled herself together, a fist delicately closed over her chest, as if she could feel her own heart beating. 

"No, not personally.'' She said. ''But I've certainly heard this name in places where there was no reason for it to be said, but I can't remember.'' 

''Regardless of how well known this man is.'' Gyro interrupted. ''We don't know what kind of connection he has with Dio, or what would happen if this corpse fell into his hands...'' 

"And it's certainly already in his hands.'' Lucy added coldly. ''Well, at least we have a part. It's a tremendous relief to know that you have at least the eye, even if you found it completely unexpectedly.'' She gave you a strange look, as if you were some kind of alien. 

"And what are we going to do?'' Louise asked, crossing her arms, knowing that everyone wanted to ask the same question. 

''Wait for Stephen.'' She answered. ''He didn't agree to call you when the corpse disappeared, but I needed to... well, we can explain part of the story to him. Part of it. You're an archaeologist, aren't you?'' 

''Oh, yes.'' You replied, tired of this question. 

"That's great, we can use this to explain what happened... without involving the Devil's Palm.'' 

''Why should we hide it from him?'' Gyro asked. ''He saw as much as we did during the race. It's not like he hasn't already dealt with it.'' 

''Before they tried to assassinate him.'' She said coldly. ''The job is stressful enough for him, I'm fighting to keep his health from getting worse, and this story would take a good few years off his life.'' 

"I agree.'' You added involuntarily. ''That's not an easy thing to understand. Even Louise and I don't understand it. Let's not make this any longer than it has to be.'' 

Although Lucy was much kinder and easier to deal with than Gyro and Johnny, you still felt you owed her proof and explanations. So, before the matter came to an agonizing and temporary end, you considered handing her the documents you had picked up, but quickly dismissed the idea. You hadn't taken the time to organize them and you feared that she would see the documents she had written herself, not wanting to imagine how confused the poor girl's mind would be. So you just discreetly left the folder and the flashlight on the study table, figuring that Lucy wouldn't be back there again today. 

You spent the rest of the day in abstraction. Lucy seemed ready to introduce you to every room in the house and, with extra excitement, the garden, wandering distractedly from one side to the other, introducing you to the servants who popped up every now and then. 

"Aren't those the guys who used to work at the race?'' Johnny asked when he saw an exceptionally short man, very familiar even to you. 

"Yes.'' Lucy said. ''Some of them worked with us even before the race, and they're still with us.'' 

''They haven't changed a bit, they seem as hurried and busy as ever.'' Gyro commented, drawing a giggle from Lucy. 

''You haven't changed a bit either, mister Zeppeli.'' 

''Oh? What do you mean?'' 

''You haven't changed as much as Jojo, I mean. You still have the same quirky sense of humor.'' 

Gyro's reply was nothing more than a golden smile. 

''Have I changed?'' Johnny asked, curious. 

''Oh, yes, you certainly have.'' She said, then looked at Gyro as if she needed confirmation. ''Don't you agree?'' 

''She’s right.'' He confirmed, looking at his friend without worrying about embarrassing him with his scrutiny. ''You look more mature, stronger. Nyo-ho! Taller too, that's for sure!'' 

Johnny grimaced at Gyro's joke, refraining from further comment, and for a while you all walked along, sometimes together, sometimes with Lucy, Johnny and Gyro leading the way, meeting and introducing workers and places in the house and garden. You were happy to follow them, so that you could look at them without disguise. 

Even though you hadn't met them before, you sensed a certain atmosphere of evolution in them. Lucy was right, Johnny had changed, he had the aura of a moth that had just come out of its cocoon - crumpled wings, fragile, but better.  

He seemed more... dry, hardened. Like a piece of ceramics finally ready. A man totally turned in on himself for two years. The long muscles of his arms were not very striking, but well defined under the skin. His blond hair looked as if it had been lighter before - from platinum to pure gold - and was adorned with a blue cap full of stars and a horseshoe on the front. Horseshoe for good luck? You wondered, not believing it to be a purely aesthetic choice. 

But the expression of a well-made man appears not only in his face,  you thought, amused. It is in his limbs and joints also, it is curiously in the joints of his hips and wrists, it is in his walk, the carriage of his neck, the flex of his waist and knees...  

Walt Whitman's poem had always summoned Thomas to you, but now it encompassed Johnny and Gyro too, no matter how different the three of them were. 

"This is your home.'' Lucy said tenderly. ''If you need anything, ask the maids. You're completely welcome here, don't forget that.'' 

You met the house servants on your little exploration when you arrived in the late afternoon. The last stop was the house's garden, full of peonies, hydrangeas, roses, and various other flowers that were apparently Lucy's personal choice. Some colorful birds rested and refreshed themselves in the small fountain and on the roof of two narrow buildings, with space for just one person and a door decorated with flowers. Apparently, these were the toilets, and you felt immense relief at the prospect of privacy, even if the structure wasn't much different - although strangely more hygienic - than that of chemical toilets. 

Walking through the garden with Louise, you didn't see anyone other than the man who watered the plants selectively, the only one who wasn't short and chubby, just like the others you'd seen. You flinched a little at the idea of suddenly being in constant control of a whole group of servants, but you reassured yourself that it shouldn't be much different from directing assistants in the laboratory, as you had done before. 

"When will her husband be back?'' Silent for a long time, Louise thought she had seen enough of the house and decided to rest on the steps of the front porch. Not wanting to part from her, you stood there, watching the small dirt road and no other houses around. 

"Before dinner, of course.'' 

''And what time is it?'' 

''I don't know. What time do people here usually have dinner?'' 

''Not at the same time as you, I'm sure.'' She scoffed, but tiredness didn't let her smile. 

In fact, she had looked like this for a long time. The theater she put on when she smiled at the sailors or pretended to be entertained by Gyro's stories became much more evident at times like this, when she gave in to exhaustion, sitting on the step while looking out over the vast, deserted countryside with a despairing gaze. 

"What now?'' She asked. 

''What?'' 

''We told Lucy, what now?'' 

''I... I don't know.'' 

''Are we going to look for the corpse again?'' 

You sighed heavily, feeling the weight of this sentence and this situation suddenly fall on your shoulders like a lead blanket. Sitting down next to her, you rubbed your hands on your arms against the cold wind. Gyro, Johnny and Lucy were in the garden, or just getting their luggage from the horses. 

"I think so.'' You replied. "Believe me, it's the last thing I want to be doing.'' 

"I do.'' 

Louise gave a slightly crooked smile, without looking at you. You saw that she had swallowed and felt like hugging her, but she was already getting up, gesturing towards the door. 

"I'm starving, aren't you?'' She asked. "What do you think we're going to eat? I hope it's not fish... that eel is still swimming around in my stomach.'' 

You then stood up and put your hand on her shoulder. 

''Hey...'' You whispered. ''Is everything all right?'' 

Of course it wasn't, you thought, but there was no other way to ask. 

''I'm fine...'' Her smile was better. ''Just tired and hungry, like you. And that's all...'' She gestured to the house and everything around it. ''It's just very rustic, very... old, you know? Too nineteenth century.'' 

''Really?'' 

''Really.'' She confirmed. ''It's getting cold in here, I'm going in.'' 

The small area that you thought was the anteroom of the house, although not as narrow and practical as one, was quite useful. There were a few bookshelves and a coat rack that you had dispensed with. A mirror hung at shoulder height, but you could still see your face and Louise's next to it. You saw her lightly touch her own lips, cursing a cut and at the same time pleased that the bruise on her temple was fading and could easily be hidden by her hair. 

You didn't have any significant wounds, just cuts, scrapes and calluses that you could feel inside your old, worn-out shoes. But you were whole; you looked alive, at least. 

"I look like a crazy person.'' You said. 

"You are a crazy person.'' Louise said, but it sounded strangely comforting. "But look... you look less pale.'' 

''Pale?'' 

''I mean... now it feels like there's blood running through your veins. You look more... I don't know, radiant?'' 

''I don't know if radiant is a good word for... this...'' You pointed at your reflection in the mirror. ''But, yes, constant adrenaline makes the heart beat faster and the blood flow faster. Maybe that's exactly what I needed... a week on horseback. And you're not so bad either... better than me, at least.'' 

"You're being kind.'' She said, somewhat dejectedly. ''I stink.'' 

''You're not.'' 

''Yes, I am.'' 

''Haven't you ever been near Gyro? Nobody stinks around him.'' 

''Oh, no...'' She gave a brief smile. ''No, the only time I got close to him was when he rescued me... and I bit him, thinking it was some giant hyena grabbing me.'' 

You laughed, turning to the other wall to look at the frames. 

"A completely natural reaction, I'd say...'' You rested your hands on your hips as you looked up at a picture above you. ''Hey, I wonder what's written here...'' 

Louise approached to try and read it, but some voices in the background distracted her from her initial task and she turned like a pigeon to listen in hiding, just like you. 

"No, certainly not.'' You were half catching the maids' conversation, it seemed. ''What woman would allow that?'' 

You were curious about the nature of the conversation and so was Louise, both of you cautiously closing the door to listen more carefully. 

"Ah, that must be the effect of the road.'' Another voice said. ''They're pretty, though.'' 

''Ah, pretty? Well, they're young. But the boys are handsome, while they look like two tanagers.'' 

"Tanagers?'' Louise asked. 

"She meant that we're less beautiful than Gyro and Johnny.'' You explained. ''Or at least grayish and dull. While the males are colorful and handsome.'' 

''Since when do you know about birds?'' 

"They're the closest relatives of the dinosaurs.'' You joked. 

''Oh, of course.'' She said, dismissing the question she'd asked. ''But ugly? For God's sake, at least we have all our teeth.'' 

"And we don't get variola.'' You added, equally indignant. 

"Nor scurvy!'' This time she laughed a little louder, denouncing her presence to the two maids who elbowed each other and shut up before they even saw who it was. 

There was a brief, hurried rush that made you feel slightly guilty, but that feeling soon subsided. 

"Should we talk to them?'' You asked. 

"Absolutely.'' Louise replied. ''And be nice to them, too. No matter how their bosses treat them.'' 

''That's obvious. But... I can't get used to it.'' 

''To what?'' 

''A house with a maid for every room.'' 

''Ah...'' She giggled. ''Don't worry about it, you just need to follow one universal and timeless rule.'' 

''Which one?'' 

''Don't fuck with those who handle your food.'' 

Being sure that she had learned this from dating an Italian chef and finding the rule extremely sensible, you took a step forward. The living room was a large room, but not at all like the living rooms you were used to. In fact, the room's only use was to keep visitors under control and limit the extent to which they could explore the house - keeping everything that interested them, such as drinks and food, in one place, as close to the exit as possible. 

You could see the two maids in the kitchen, among the aromas of herbs and roast chicken. Your stomach rumbled embarrassingly, but only Louise heard and refrained from commenting. You spent days feeding yourselves on unseasoned meat and canned food seasoned only with aluminum and poor production controls. 

There were only two maids. An older lady, chubby, rosy cheeks from the heat of the kitchen and shiny gray curls tied up in a cloth cap, occasionally escaping, rebellious. You guessed that was the cook when you saw that the other maid was young enough to be her daughter, but she was just sweeping the floor with disguised resignation, as if they were hiding the cardinal sin they had committed of stopping work for a few seconds to chat about the sudden visitors. 

When you saw them, they also saw you and Louise. Their eyes, both clear, but one blue and the other gray-green, widened and they stopped what they were doing in exaggerated respect. You slowed your pace, losing your initial courage and letting Louise go ahead of you. 

"Hello.'' Louise said sympathetically as she stopped in front of the counter that divided the kitchen from the dining room. ''We haven't had a chance to introduce ourselves, have we?'' 

''Oh, no, no.'' The younger girl said in a frantic but disciplined way. ''There's no need to...'' 

"Don't worry, we're not mesdames. '' Louise said, holding out her hand. ''I'm Louise, and you?'' 

The girl hesitated for a moment before accepting the handshake, but took courage and did so. 

"Vionnet.'' She said. "At your service, ladies.'' 

Louise then held out her other hand to the cook, who promptly wiped her carrot-smeared hands on a clean cloth and returned the shake. 

"Margaret, but you can call me Margie.'' 

Being as polite as Louise, you also shook their hands. 

''(Y/N).'' You said simply. ''Do you know what time it is?'' 

''It's six o'clock.'' The youngest answered promptly after checking a clock you hadn't noticed on the mantelpiece in the living room. 

''Do you know when mister Steel will be back?'' 

''Oh, I’m not sure.'' Vionnet turned to the kitchen, her eyes wide and pretty like a owl’s. ''Margie, do you know?'' 

''In an hour, perhaps. Or two. It depends on what he's doing.'' 

"He said he was going to a conference.'' Louise said, leaning casually on the worktop. ''It smells great! What are you cooking?'' 

"I'm preparing the chicken that young Peter brought from the town.'' Margaret explained in her husky, sweet voice, returning to her chores. ''Accompanied by mashed potatoes with grated carrots. Is there anything you ladies would like to add?'' 

''Oh, no, it's fine as it is.'' You said. ''That's a real feast next to the rabbits Johnny used to hunt.'' 

"Oh, and Gyro's coffee.'' Louise added, feeling goosebumps. "Nothing is going to convince me that that isn't oil.'' 

Vionnet and Margaret looked at each other, mutually curious, and then turned to the two of you. 

"Johnny...'' Vionnet babbled. ''Did you mean Jojo? Joe Kid?'' 

''I thought he'd visit madam Steel one day, after so many letters... but I didn't see you two coming, ladies.'' 

''Does Lucy write a lot of letters to Johnny?'' You asked, curious. 

''Oh yes, every week! We don't know what she writes so much, but she says it's extremely confidential and she only trusts young Peter to deliver them to the station...'' The cook continued, hopelessly seized by the impulse for a good gossip. ''But, ah... well... I imagine you're their wives, aren't you? Lucy is a very good girl, she would never commit adultery or do anything inappropriate, I can assure you of that. They're just good friends.'' 

"Yes, good friends!'' Vionnet confirmed, which reassured you that that wasn't what they thought. 

"Oh, we're nobody's wives.'' Louise clarified. ''I'm just a widow and my friend here... she's a woman of science. What Johnny and Lucy are sharing is none of our business.'' 

"Even so, I hope they're not sharing anything.'' You said harshly. "She's only sixteen.'' 

"And mister Steel is fifty-eight.'' Vionnet said. "I think she'd be happier with mister Joestar, don't you?'' 

You remained quiet, both dumbfounded by the age difference between her and her husband and defeated by the cleaning lady's argument. 

"Poor thing...'' Louise said quietly, looking around to make sure they hadn't returned from their expedition in the garden. ''And how is mister Steel?'' 

''Oh, Lucy is the only person he ever treats with kindness.'' Margaret said, refraining from further description when the door to the living room opened with a creak. You could see from the gleam in Margaret's eyes that she was anxious to tell you something more. By now, you had seen the whole house and most of the servants and concluded that everything seemed strangely normal. 

Louise looked at the door and so did Vionnet. You lingered a little longer as you watched the cook grate the carrots with a very different grater than the ones you'd seen before. 

"Did you enjoy the garden tour?'' Louise asked with a certain amount of sarcasm. 

Whoever had come in had dumped a considerable amount of luggage on the floor next to the armchair and was walking towards the kitchen. 

"Ah, yes.'' Gyro answered, tired and equally sarcastic. ''You missed a very interesting display of the gardener pruning peonies.'' 

''How unlucky for us.'' You said, turning to see what he had dropped. 

If the maids had any doubts about your stay or visit, they were all cleared up when Gyro left his and Johnny's bags on the floor, planning to take them to another room later. However, helpful and frantic, Vionnet promptly picked up the bags and made a point of taking them upstairs. 

Startled by the small figure that had shot right past him to pick up the bags, Gyro felt a twinge of guilt at making it look like he had left the bags there for a woman to carry. 

"Hey, hey, girl.'' He stopped her, not being quick enough to put his hand on her shoulder. ''Don't worry about it, I can carry it up myself. I'm just taking a break.'' 

Vionnet raised her glowing face to Gyro, who outstripped the little maid by almost twelve inches. She looked just a little older than Lucy, graceful and slightly curvy; in front of her, Gyro looked like a Roman sculpture, severe and broad-boned. With his long, straight nose and long hair gleaming gold. 

''As you wish, mis... mister...'' She answered Gyro a little late. 

''Zeppeli.'' He said, with an exaggerated amount of confidence. ''Gyro Zeppeli. And you, pretty girl?'' 

''Vi...Vionnet.'' 

''Oh, Vionnet.'' He smiled when he pronounced her name in an exaggeratedly French way. ''That's a nice name. I would never allow a girl with such a pretty name to carry my luggage.'' 

"Vionnet, listen to the man and come finish sweeping the kitchen!'' The cook ordered, not too sternly. 

Noticing Louise lightly tapping on your arm with her elbows, you smiled at the scene. 

It was indeed remarkable, you thought, the instant effect Gyro had on women. He didn't say or do anything out of the ordinary, yet Gyro undeniably caught people's attention. He possessed a fascination, almost magnetic, that drew everyone into the glow around him. 

It drew you in; Gyro turned and smiled at you, and without realizing that he had moved, you saw him close enough to notice the soft, dry tan on the tops of his cheekbones and feel the faint wisp of flowers that remained in his hair from his wanderings through the garden. 

"Where are Johnny and Lucy?'' Louise asked, an expert at breaking uncomfortable silences. 

"Johnny is putting the saddles away and Lucy is insisting that he let the groom do it.'' He replied, with a hint of humor. ''And you, ladies? Getting to know the house better?'' 

''Yeah, how long are we going to be here?'' You asked, a little diffident. 

''Lucy won't let us leave until everything is sorted out.'' He said, putting his hand on his hip and taking off his hat. "Look on the bright side, you'll have beds for a while.'' 

"Oh, you mean we have guests, then?'' The cook intervened, looking at the young maid. ''What are you doing standing there, Vionnet? Go tidy up the rooms!'' 

''Yes, ma'am!'' She promptly obeyed, abandoning her previous task of sweeping the kitchen. 

You frowned, somewhat confused and worried. 

''Gyro...'' You said, putting your hand on Louise's shoulder to make her walk with you. "Can we talk to you outside?'' 

Gyro stared at you like a circumspect owl, but readily agreed. On the way to the door, you saw him turn to the lovely Vionnet for a moment; some congenital tic made him unable to close a single eye in a wink whenever he wanted to, and Louise held back from giggle. But that impulse soon vanished when you stopped on the porch outside the house and Louise closed the door behind her. 

"Seriously.'' You said, changing your tone almost instantly to head scientist as you crossed your arms. ''How long are we talking about?'' 

"Don't talk like I know, bambina. '' He said, as frustrated as you. ''I didn't want to spend my vacation in America like this either.'' 

"Well, I didn't want to spend my post-demission like this.'' Louise added, just to show that she was unhappy too. ''Where are we going to start, anyway?'' 

''After the bastard with the corpse, for sure. And then the Devil's Palm, which seems to be the hardest part without the trackers.'' You said. ''Johnny seems to know how that gang acts, he must have some clue as to who's with the corpse now.'' 

"Are you serious? I'm sure it's with Dio right now.'' Gyro said. 

''I'm sure it's not.'' You interrupted. ''It takes eight or nine days from New Jersey to Staten Island, which is half the way it would be if we were going to Manhattan... and that's where he lives, right? Manhattan. The corpse is not with Creed, it seems, but with some very reliable courier.'' 

''And how do you know that?'' 

''That's what he said at the hiding place.'' 

''And why the hell wouldn't it already be with Dio?'' 

''I don't think he's in such a hurry to build a plane that can deliver the corpse to him in minutes!'' 

He was surprised when he saw you raise your voice, impatient, but he didn't back down. 

"You don't even know what you're talking about.'' 

''I know more about that corpse than anyone else in the world now and that's the only thing that matters!'' 

He laughed debauchedly and tiredly. 

"Let's see if you'll say that when you're in the hands of Dio or his affiliates.'' 

''I'm sure the corpse never even left New Jersey. We don't know the actual location, but we know the destination, and that's a big advantage." 

"He could be bluffing.'' 

''Yes, he could. But then where could he have left the corpse? For God's sake, Gyro, we can be smarter and faster than that. We need to get home, we can't waste any more time and above all we mustn't abuse our damn hospitality here! God, Louise and I have barely met Lucy and suddenly we're waiting for her husband to arrive for dinner? Meanwhile the corpse is somewhere, and the Devil's Palm is somewhere else! And guess what? We need to find them both, Gyro, both of them! We can't stay here while...'' 

"Oh, darling, you're early!'' You heard a quiet voice say up ahead. 

A sudden silence came over you and you didn't dare continue the discussion. Your embarrassment expanded with such force that it almost tore you apart. Stephen arrived, in his green suit, social but not overly formal. Stepping firmly, breathing heavily, and soon was in Lucy's arms. The next moment you heard her - alive, real - coming out onto the porch with a rush in her fresh pink dress, the short but full sleeves hiding her shoulders. The march of the day resumed its course, and it was time for dinner. 

"Looks like someone's came early for dinner.'' Louise remarked relaxedly, although disconcerted by the discussion, as she watched Stephen Steel get off the same wagon that had left. She was clearly surprised, perhaps as much as the maids would have been, by Stephen's early hour. ''Good, I'm starving and you shouldn't stress on an empty stomach, Lady Loboutin.'' 

"Listen to your friend and get your head on straight.'' Gyro said. ''What's the point of going home if you're too mad to enjoy it? The day isn't over yet.'' 

One of the effects of stress, withdrawal and sleep deprivation is that you stop thinking coherently; and that's exactly what was happening to you. But you'd gotten used to this state enough to know that you only had two choices when faced with a social situation: keep quiet and look unfriendly, or open your mouth and look hysterical. 

Even though you weren't always in a similar situation, you had chosen all your life to keep quiet, and now would be no different; but what irritated you was the satisfaction on Gyro's face when he saw you suddenly go silent, as if he had won something. 

He'll lose that smile soon, you thought spitefully, and then smiled to greet mister Steel. 

[purplenickel]

Last night

‘Where was I last night?’ I thought, flabbergasted, looking at the small stack of three phone numbers with names I had just pulled from my pocket. Some had hearts and another, makeup kisses smeared on cocktail napkins. I sat back on my bed, still wearing the clothes from last night’s bar crawl. Let’s think. Me and Marty started off the evening at Joe’s Pool Hall, playing snooker for cheap laughs and cheaper beer. Then, maybe we went to Molly’s? I couldn’t remember exactly. But as the town’s assumedly only openly butch lesbian, who would have thought I’d pull numbers from girls in this town? Maybe one of these girls would be open to dating. I had to find out who they all were first.

I picked up my phone and breathed out a relieved sigh. Charged. At least I had done that much last night. 

I looked over the numbers, carefully weighing my odds. Helpfully, each girl had written a name to go with the number. In total, we had Jackie, Marleen, and CJ. 

I decided to call Jackie first. She seemed excited that I called so I set up a date. We were going to get ice cream and coffee that afternoon. I got a shower and dressed in my usual go to outfit for meeting friends: a funky patterned button up and some jeans that weren’t too worn.

She showed up in a loose spaghetti strap shirt and a pair of denim shorts with a pixie style haircut. She was fairly cute with symmetrical features and bright blue eyes. Jackie smiled and pulled me up to order our coffees and ice cream. I got a vanilla latte and a mango sorbet while she ordered a flat white and a bowl of chocolate gelato.

We talked for an hour, going through two servings of the cold treat  and a coffee and a half before we agreed it probably wasn’t going to work out. But she said she’d like to come to my softball matches when they started up again.

The next day, I called Marleen. She had a strong Louisiana accent and agreed to get lunch. I met her in front of the Greek place. Not my favorite restaurant but the gyros were decent. Marleen was a plus size woman with skin as dark as strong espresso and a gap tooth smile. She was younger than I thought she’d be and revealed we had an almost eight year difference, which was shocking and slightly unnerving to me. We gave each other an awkward hug and I held the door open for her. Our date started well enough but she pulled out her phone and started watching TikToks while we were talking, which was a little rude. I didn’t think I was that boring. When I asked her about it, she stammered and said she was nervous and the videos were distracting her from her feelings. I could understand that but it still felt rude and we didn’t really have a lot in common. We agreed to split amicably.

Finally, I pulled up the last number: CJ. Based on the initials and handwriting, I couldn’t tell what kind of person I’d be meeting, but I called anyway. CJ had a low voice like a late night talk show radio host. Made me feel cozy and ready to reveal all my secrets, a voice I could listen to for hours. She told me she used both she/her pronouns and they/them which I thought was cool. I had never met a nonbinary person offline so I hoped I didn’t mess things up. I decided to try rotating pronouns in my head. They said they would plan the date, a change of pace for me since every girl I had dated before wanted me as the masculine party to set everything up. They called me back the next date and asked me to meet her in town. She would take us for a drive and dinner. I said ok and began planning an outfit. 

CJ picked me up in a mud splattered Jeep Wrangler and looked different than I would’ve guessed. They had a haircut that was shaved on one side and cut into a shoulder length bob on the other side. She had an ear full of piercings on the buzzcut side and a stud in their nose. Caramel skin revealed strong thighs in denim cutoffs and she wore a SPCA volunteer t-shirt from 2014. I smiled at her and she smiled back. 

“Where to, Driver?”

“I thought we’d go up on the ridge and have a picnic while it’s still nice. Sound ok?”

I hesitated for a second and smiled widely. “Sounds good.”

We talked while she drove, the entire trip taking maybe half an hour. It was on the brink of summer in the early part of June where the sun doesn't set til after eight so we had plenty of daylight left. They pulled over to an area on top of the mountain that had two wooden picnic tables for travelers to stop and rest. She smiled at me and winked, before climbing out of the Jeep and pulling a cooler and a sheet out of the trunk. We set everything up: containers of Mediterranean pasta salad, fresh baked rolls and herb butter, a plastic tupperware full of berries and two large mason jars full of mint tea.

I was shocked at how everything had come together and how much I liked being treated well, like a girl. Sometimes dating women, they expected it to be like dating a man and that worked well some of the time but left something to be desired if it happened all the time. I smiled and tilted my jar towards hers in a toast to a picnic well planned. 

We ate and talked and somehow I never noticed the sky start to change into orange and pink until she exclaimed that the sunset behind me was to die for. I turned to see and she grabbed my hand. I felt a shiver run down my body and smiled quietly to myself. Maybe this time I’d found a keeper.

[mrsvalentinefucker1]

Semi public handjob: Johnny Joestar x f!reader

It’s no secret that you desired Johnny. Gyro would often use it against you in arguments so how could you forget.

One night, you, gyro and Johnny found a place to stay for the night.. it was a cabin in a not so populated area.

Gyro and Johnny went over and knocked on the door while you waited, posted on your horse

“Hello.” A man with grey hair and a skull goatee came out

“Oh.. sorry to interrupt but we were wonder if we could stay the night here. See, we’re i the steel ball run race and we really have nowhere to stay tonight.” Gyro explained

“And what time do you exactly plan on leaving?” The man looked down at Johnny

“Early in the morning.”

The man nodded “names Ringo. Come inside and get washed up. I’m making dinner now.”

The men thanked him and motioned for you to join them.

“Thank you sir..”

the man looked you up and down “not a problem. You can go take a shower if you want. It’s upstairs.”

“Thank you. I’ll be back in a few minutes…”

You let gyro and Johnny know you were going to take a shower

Your mind started to drift as you took your clothing off. It’s been so long since someone had touched you, you had dreams about Johnny being the one to feel you up and take what he wanted from you

Soon enough you got out of the shower and headed downstairs to get with Johnny.

“Dinners ready. Do any of you want any?”

“I’m fine.. I’ll just sit down on the couch. I’m a bit tired anyways.”

“Oh I forgot. There is only one other room. Someone is probably gonna have to sleep on the couch.”

You all three looked at each other

“We could all probably fit on that bed!” Gyro joked

“Well actually we probably could. Me and y/n are both rather small so you could sleep in the bed with us.”

“… I guess” gyro stopped laughing and looked at the floor in embarrassment

The three of you got ready for bed and started making the sleeping arrangements

“Johnny you can sleep in the middle if you want.” You pointed to the bed

“I’ll sleep on the edge. I don’t feel like being crushed by gyro all night.. plus you’re a girl so you should be protected and comfortable.. take the middle.”

You smiled slightly

“We should probably lay down then.. tomorrow is going to be s long day yaknow..”

The two men agreed

Gyro laid down, then you helped Johnny lay down and you crawled over gyro

“Move gyro! You took over my whole side!”

“Geez sorry! Here I’ll move.”

You three got comfortable, gyro drifted off to sleep and you pretend to be asleep and roll over to lay on johnnys chest.

“Y/n?”

You hummed

“What are you doing..?”

“Nothing jojo..” you moved your hand to his thigh and began kissing his neck

“Y/n.. what about gyro?” He whispered loudly

“He won’t know. You know he’s a heavy sleeper~” his cock started springing to life as you spoke those words “plus.. I think you need some time to relax, all you do is worry..”

Johnny nodded as his breath began to hitch

Your hand made its way onto his cock, rubbing him through his pants.

“Just take it out..” Johnny whispered

You did as he asked and started pumping his cock into your hand. Johnny began whispering your name, moaning about how good you make him feel and then

“Oh fuck.. y/n.. I- oh god I love it.. I love you!”

“You.. love me?”

Johnnys face went blank and he nodded

You began to pump faster, tightening your grip a little more

“Cum for me jojo. Show me how much you love me.”

Johnny began kissing your forhead and moaning sweet nothings into your ear as you pumped him guiding him to his sweet release all over your hand..

Gyro turned over

“Can you two be quiet.” He laughed it off and rolled back over

You two froze and didn’t speak again for the rest of the night

————

Buy me a Kofi! ☕️

Definitely not required but they do help:)

[tonberry-yoda]

SPEAKING OF STUDYING😭😭

I also wanted to submit smth else yippee

Ofc its gyro again its me were talking ab🙏

Idk if its like modern au or smth so we can make this work but yeah ill leave that to u💯

Soo to get to the point Gyro w a fem reader who cannot focus on her homework even if she rlly wants to like zoning out etc (adhd moment hahahahaha send help😻) and is frustrated about it (im gonna pull my hair out im so mad with my brain rn😻🙏)

SO YEAH THATS BASICALLY IT FOR MY ADHD GYRO LOVERS OUT THERE 😘😘(its me)

Yippee TY FOR UR TIME UR WORKS R TRULY AMAZING also keep an eye out for more dpf as soon as im done w exams hehe🤭🤭

Distractions - Gyro Zeppeli

notes - AHHHH DIEGOSAUR MY BELOVED! I have had a CRAZY Gyro brainrot as of late and remembered this was here, so I thought it would also be a nice short fic to get me out of a block! Thanks so much for the request and I hope you're doing well <3 word count - 328 summary - (modern AU) You are stressed out for exams coming up and keep getting distracted. But luckily, your boyfriend, Gyro, is willing to help you study

You chewed on the end of your pen and zoned out for.... what was it.... the fifteenth time now?!

You groaned at yourself, nearly feeling like you were losing your mind.

College was getting too damn stressful and it didn't help that you had to work a job and exams were coming up.

"Hey, I'm back." You heard Gyro enter your shared dorm, placing his keys in the bowl in front of the door. "How're you doin' pumpkin?"

"Fine." you said rather passive aggressively, making Gyro giggle.

"You don't sound fine." he said.

"I just can't focus and it's pissing me off. Stupid brain." You rested your hands on your head.

"Do you need help?" he asked super nicely.

"You would do that? I mean, I know you're busy with your internship and-"

"Look," he interrupted, placing a little kiss on your lips. "If we cut up time into sections, that might help. I can study with you for 45 minutes and then we can watch TV and cuddle for... lets say... 20 minutes, and then back to studying."

You thought about it in your head. Not only would that help you a lot, but you would get the reward of cuddling your boyfriend.

"Sounds good!" You high fived him and quickly got to work. Whenever you would space out, Gyro would be able to help get you back on track or know when a break was in order. He was so used to doing things like this by himself that helping you was a piece of cake.

The breaks consisted of TV and dinner, and finally, you felt succeeded in your studying, not scared for your exams one bit.

"You ready to cuddle then?" Gyro smirked.

"Yes please." You hugged around the back of his neck and pressed a kiss to his ear.

He carried you upstairs and the two of you fell asleep with smiles on your faces.

You were ready to kick that exam's ass.

~~~~~

jjba masterlist (2) (3) | pinned post

2023 @tonberry-yoda – do not repost or claim ANY of my work as your own! likes, reblogs, and comments are not only welcome, but appreciated <3

~~~~~

[sailforvalinor]

Okay but wait, you went to Athens?! I’m going there for a couple days this June! Do you have any recommendations for what to see/eat while I’m there? (I’ll for sure see the Acropolis but other than that the itinerary is pretty open)

OOOOH that’s so exciting!!! I’m gonna try not to go overboard but here are a few of my favorite things:

• Monastiraki Square—depending on how you come at it, of course, it’s on the way to the Acropolis, and there’s a VERY cool open air market there. (There’s a giant sign, you can’t miss it.) Just make sure you keep a hand on your purse, it’s quite well-known for pickpocketing. Also, if you head up to the Acropolis from there, you’ll pass Hadrian’s Library, which is a really cool set of ruins where you can clearly see the different layers of where it was built over over time. But you won’t really be hard-pressed to find ruins in Athens, and the entry fees are usually pretty cheap—just make sure you always have some form of ID on you, sometimes they’ll ask for that.

• Also, if you take that way up to the Acropolis, you’ll pass Mars Hill (also called the Areopagus), which is where Paul preached to the Athenians in Acts! It’s a bit graffitied over (but that’s just kind of how Athens is), but it’s still REALLY cool, and you get a gorgeous view of the city from up there. Just be careful up there, it’s pretty much just a big rock and I almost fell many times 😂

• Bus tours are also fun if you want to see a broader swath of the city—there are a bunch that leave from Syntagma Square (and they’re double-decker!).

• Speaking of Syntagma, you could see the changing of the guards—they do it every hour, but the only time they do it in full-costume is at 11 am on Sundays. It was interesting, but honestly I think you could skip it, it’s not much to write home about.

• However, what you should NOT skip is the National Gardens—it’s fairly close to Syntagma, entry is free if I’m remembering correctly, and it’s absolutely gorgeous. They have turtles!!!!

• You could go to the Panathenaic Stadium, although they do charge entry. I would say just to go look at it if you really want to see it, but I don’t know that’s it’s worth paying to go inside—I did go inside once, but that was during the Marathon in November when everyone got in free, lol.

• In terms of food, in a strange twist, the Americanized version of Greek food is actually a lot lighter than the authentic kind—true Greek food (or at least in this area of Greece) is a lot heavier. It’s a lot of pasta and meat. I wasn’t actually the biggest fan of it, but if you want to try the staples, go for moussaka or souvlaki, which will be at almost any restaurant. What you definitely need to get though is tzatziki—oh my GOSH that stuff is wonderful.

• Also, you have to try lemon Coke and oregano Lay’s—I’m convinced that when the Ancient Greeks were imagining what ambrosia and nectar tasted like, they were dreaming of the flavors of lemon Coke and oregano Lay’s. I’ve found that no American variation (even with Freestyle machines) even compares to Greek lemon Coke.

• I found that gyros actually aren’t all that popular (or at least in this part of Greece)—I only ever had two in my four months of living there. They were really good, though.

• The coffee is great everywhere, honestly. One of the most popular drinks there is freddo, which is definitely worth trying if you’re big on espresso drinks. It is very intense, though.

• Dinner was honestly one of my biggest culture shocks while I was there. They don’t really start eating dinner until 7 at the earliest (and even that’s a little early)—so be prepared to get odd looks if you go get dinner at 5:30 (not that you can’t, of course). Also, it’s general practice to sit around and talk after your meal for hours—I saw families out with their little kids at 11 pm. Again, you don’t have to do this, but don’t be surprised when you see it, lol. Also, because of this, they consider it rude to interrupt you by bringing you your bill, so you have to ask for it by flagging down a waiter—I once got stuck for nearly an hour because I was waiting for a bill 😂.

• If you’re there on a Sunday, be warned that most stores and restaurants will be closed—there are exceptions, but it’s easy to get stuck somewhere without anything to eat.

I’m so excited for you, I hope you have fun!!

[knight-engale]

feeling for the other’s pulse with their lips for morgan and rowan?

Touch Prompts

This ended up a little smutty because of course it did, so here's a cut for ya

Morgan looked at her reflection in the bathroom mirror, nervousness forming in her stomach. She had no real reason to be nervous, of course...Rowan had never not been excited to see her in something like this...but it was the first time she'd dressed up for them since she'd gotten home... The first time after that nasty fight... Still, though, this was Rowan she was talking about. She was pretty sure it would be more effort to make them find her unattractive.

The apartment door opened as she fussed over her hair. Morgan didn't notice at first, not until she heard a familiar voice.

"Morgan...? Are you up here?"

"Ah! Yes, love, just a moment!" Morgan took a deep breath, adjusted her engagement pendant, and left the bathroom. As expected, just a glimpse of her in this outfit--a sheer white top with plenty of lace, and matching panties--Rowan's jaw dropped, their eyes going about as big as saucers. Their gaze didn't seem to want to settle anywhere in particular.

"Hello, my flame...welcome home." She walked over to them, pecking them on the lips before turning her attention to their jaw and neck, being careful to avoid their pendant. She felt their breath just about stop. She smiled to herself when her lips landed on one of the pulse points on their neck. Their heart was racing...as it should be.

"How was work?" she asked in a low voice.

"It was...ah...fine..."

"Good, good. Are you hungry?"

Morgan felt Rowan swallow roughly at the question. "A little..."

"I thought you might be. Come, there's gyros for dinner...and if you're good, you might get something quite nice for dessert." She kissed their pulse points again, just to feel their heartbeat once more. Gods...that was one of the most delicious feelings. She wondered if they'd even last until dinner was over...

[wetladss]

Day 40

We woke up and had a nice breakfast in town which consisted of coffee and croissants. We found Airbnb host advertise breakfast in there offers even though it is a very small meal. The town was a lot more lively with what looked like the all the retirees catching up for the morning and sitting on all the park benches. We chilled out for a bit and had a small walk before heading back to Naples on the train. We arrived and headed to the accommodation and checked our stuff in. We had some lunch then Thalia went off for pole and I did a home workout. Afterwards we got ragu takeaway. Delicious as always.

Day 41 - Athens

We woke up and had another croissant and coffee breakfast before catching a bus to the airport. Our flight got delayed a tad so we watched some avatar on the laptop before the plane arrived and we flew out to Greece. We arrived in Athens and it was really fucken hot. 42 degrees so we caught a taxi to our accommodation to avoid any walking in the heat. Once we settled in we explored the area. We had a Gyros which was cheap and really delicious. 3.50 euros for a feed. That marked the beginning of many. Athens was a pretty cool city. A lot of trendy restaurants and bars in the area we stayed in that was called Exarchia. After lunch we went back to the apartment to escape the midday heat. We did a workout and rested and then went out at night when it had slightly cooled off. Still mid 30s. We met up with a friend of Thalias for dinner. Seems to be Greeks like eating late as we had dinner around 9.30 and finished up at 11.30. Nice food.

Day 42 - Serifos

The next day we got up late and checked out just before lunch. We headed into the city and had some Greek yogurt and eggs for breakfast. The yogurt was really nice. We headed to Thalia's Greek office branch and were able to leave our bags there while we walked around and explored the area. Saw the acropolis for the first time which looked pretty epic and had another gyros. We had a look at the markets and then had another gyros before collecting our bags and heading off to catch a train to the ferry. The ferry ended up being one made by incat which was pretty cool to see. We then caught the 2ish hour ferry to the island. It was pretty nice area with a small town at the port and then a town on one of the hills/mountains that over looked it. Nice white building and had beaches either side of the town which was nice. We checked in to a lovely accommodation and got given a cold face towel which was nice coming from 30+ degrees with bags after walking up a hill. We then headed out for dinner and had a meal on the water front. It was ok food but a bit pricy. Afterwards we walked along the beach for sunset before heading back to the accommodation.

Day 43 -

Woke up for an awesome breakfast. Buffet with savory and sweets. Big bowl of yogurt fruit and peanut butter then some savouries to finish off. We then headed to the beach and relaxed there. It was hot but there were trees that grew in the sand that you could rest under which worked perfectly. There was also a beach restaurant where we got bacon, eggs and pancakes from during the day. The water was really nice to swim in and a perfect temperature. Refreshing and a little crisp but you didn’t get cold staying in it. We spent most of the day there and then got gyros for dinner and having another beach walk for sunset. We grabbed some donuts covered in honey and walnuts called loukoumades with ice cream on the way back which was delicious and checked out some of the yachts in the area that were docked. We then headed back to the accommodation and grabbed our swimmers and went for a sunset swim before heading back for the night.

Day 44

Same as yesterday, big breaky then off to the beach. Had gyros for lunch and then stayed at the beach again. Swimming, sleeping and reading. We then caught the bus up to the mountain town to have dinner and spend the night. It was a pretty epic little town nestled into the mountain. There was a church at the summit and they had squished in a town square just down from it. The colors were really nice as well. In the square there was a yellow restaurant and a blue restaurant. We had an ice cream and mojito at the blue one. There was also a wedding happening which was interesting to see happening in another church next to the town square. We then headed up to the top to watch the sun set and see the view of everything around. You get a good view of all the coastline and the port town below. After that we headed to a restaurant on the side of the mountain that overlooked the ocean which didn’t look like much on the inside but the food was incredible. Honey roast lamb, fennel pie and Greek salad. One of the best meals on the trip. We called it Thalias birthday dinner. We then walked back down to our accolades afterwards and surprisingly only took 30 minutes. Crashed after that walk as the next day we planned to walk up the hill for sunrise.

Day 45

We woke up just before 5 to start the walk up to the top of the mountain to see the sunrise. It was a bit of a mission and Thalia wanted to stop before we got to the top but we got there and it was a pretty epic. It was also a lot cooler than it was during the day which was nice even though we got pretty hot walking up. Nice walk between the old white building on the way up and caught a beautiful sunrise. We made it back to the hotel by 7 so we slept another hour and then had another delicious brekky. They let us have a late checkout so we headed to the beach and read our books and then showered before getting the ferry back to Athens. We had some takeaway gyros for lunch. We the planned to catch up with Thalias friend again but we were pretty exhausted so we had a nap. We got up and went into town, had a really good gelato and then found a cool little Mexican place with hand made tacos for dinner. Also frozen margaritas. Then off to bed.

Day 46

We got pancakes, eggs and bacon for brekky. Was delicious. Then we head to the ancient agora which Thalia was keen to do instead of the acropolis as she had been before. It was really cool and we did an audio tour that we found on Soundcloud which explained the ruins and got you to imagine Socrates, Plato and Aristotle living there and other interesting characters. We had a Greek lunch at a little restaurant near our Airbnb. On the way there we saw some guy shoot up and around the corner saw a lady peeing on a pillar, there were heaps of needles on the ground everywhere too. We found out Athens gives out free needles to avoid infections but it is pretty hectic. Not that the people seemed intimidating, just weird to see that so public but we did find out we where staying in a known dodgy area. We chilled for a while because it was still extremely hot. Thalia went to pole and I went up to the acropolis which was awesome. Pretty crazy overlooking the whole city and thinking how far it’s come but also a bit sad seeing it’s all worn down and a bit destroyed. Also got to see the London philharmonic orchestra doing their warm ups in the theatre below the acropolis which was pretty sick. We met up with Thalias friend, Iro, for dinner in a very pretty square full of restaurants. I got a gelato from nearby before dinner, then we had a spread of things to share. The lemon slow cooked beef was great. Thalia was really happy to see Iro again before leaving.

Day 47

I watched the tv show the boys while thalia went to her favourite cafe in Exarchia. I had started to feel a bit sick again which I think was due to the huge day yesterday and the hot dry air agitating my airways. She brought back some yoghurt , honey and walnuts and a spinach pastry for brekky. Then we head to a new hostel which was pretty cheap. We couldn’t check in yet so we just dumped our bags and head to a park to get some shade. We had to watch out laying in the grass because there were some needles. Then we went and got a delicious lunch - chicken in a creamy bacon sauce and a fig and cheese salad with an orange juice dressing. Thalia said this was her birthday lunch. We checked into the hotel and then Thalia went to poke while I watched the diplomat. We went out to a burger place and their menu had just two options, one or 2 patties and were really cheap. They were delicious. We got an early nights sleep because we had a pretty early flight to Berlin the next day.

[venturingvietnam2024]

#6 The near death experience

Checking out is probably the worst part of the travelling life at the moment, because you check out at 8am but need to be organised enough to have you day pack ready for the day adventure and your belongings for the overnight train later in the night - but you will also use the communal shower prior to that, so bag organisation is an effort!! That and the fact you lose your air conditioned room that you may have only used for one hour the night before, but hey, you keep on keeping on! Today’s adventure, ATV and Zipling! The bus left at 8.30am and Elias (Norway) joined the lobby at 8.28am, well timed. We made our way through the city and out to the mountain where the roads were as windy and bumpy as they come. Think great ocean road x2 with a billion pot holes. However, when we got to the location, it was actually quite resort-y! We were not expecting that! Naively, nor was I expecting the 10cm jungle spider outside the bathroom window (without glass). Definitely in the jungle now! We had a 3 mins safety demonstration for the Zipline, jumped in the golf buggy and we were away - plenty safe so far.. The Zipline was actually great! There were about ten lines through the rainforest with a few climbing obstacles also. Easy enough for sure. Safe enough for sure. We sat down to what felt like a private lunch in the rainforest with chicken and rice, a small soup and drinks. It was actually lovely getting my to know Elias better, at 20 on his first solo venture. His mum lives in the Arctic circle, on an island above Norway, where he also did high school. He said they love snowmobiling out there for fun, however noted you must take a rifle because of the polar bears and be wary of the glacial cracks that you can plummet down.. Ek, okay! He also shared insights on the day and night routine, with the area dark for 24 hours most of the year. Crazy. After lunch, we organised ourselves for the ATV. Another 3 minute safety demonstration and a test lap and good to go. Safe as, once again. I felt okay, having done it in Canada and thinking it would be relatively the same (minus the snow) - it was not. I legit feared for my life through half of it. Within the first 100m, I had used the brakes on an inclined hill (which is an error but the person in front was going to slow!) and started slipping backwards toward the edge - which was a drop covered into Vietnamese jungle and god knows what animals. Slightly nervy, but continuing on. The roads were carved out with valleys where the water had ran down the mountain, and the inclines were really quite steep! Whilst I pushed on, the guide helped me on two occasions because I was actually terrified to do it alone and roll the quad bike. Anywho, there are few photos of that experience, because I was essentially holding on for dear life the entire time! But - made it back in one piece, phew! Actually a close call on about three counts. Back in the reception area, the bus was an hour off so we went down to the waterfalls for a swim. Without bathers, underwear it was! The water was clear, but I only had a quick dip and attempted to dry off for the bus. That and the jungle has taken enough of me today, I don’t need to be eaten by anything in the water! Heading back, I was so glad I went on that adventure. I nearly didn’t, as I thought I was going to be alone as Elias booked late, but it was a great day! One that sharing to the rest of the group later was a fun tale, I’m just glad we came out unscathed! Vietnamese jungle 1 - Lis 0. Back at the hostel, we wandered for Greek Gyros for dinner and I showered (read, ran cold water over my body and the sweated up a storm whilst attempting to get dressed, so ‘shower’ is a loose term) and got organised for the overnight train. The days have been busy! With little place to base ourselves of late, and heading into our second overnight train, fatigue is setting in! I’m thankful my sleeping ability is excellent, but an afternoon nap might be in order tomorrow. Hoi Anh, you beautiful lantern covered city, we are coming for you!

Written Monday March 25th at 9.10pm

[retlasute]

॰ In The Rich Man's World ॰

Word count: 4300

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Chapter 16 - Right Back Where We Started From

"You said that people won't use trains in the future, so is this the first time you're getting on one?'' That's what Johnny asked when you arrived at the station.  

"No.'' You answered, kindly. ''I've traveled to a few places that offered a train ride as part of the tour, so no. But this is the first time I've seen a machine this old... or should I say new?" 

''New, definitely. Unless the trains of your era are driverless and trackless.''  

''Haha! We have something similar, at least close to that. But no, we're not that evolved yet.''  

''Well, they sent a man to the moon in a way I've never imagined in my life. I think your era are quite evolved.''  

''Really? And what would you imagine it would be like to take someone to the moon?'' 

''Hm... by train.'' He said foolishly. "They would build tracks to the moon and then we'd know space.''  

You laughed, but not at him. It was simply interesting.  

"Ah, it makes sense in theory, doesn't it?'' You encouraged him. "It would take decades, sure, but the theory makes sense.'' 

You talked to Johnny for a while about the day, the station and the place you were going. He had mentioned that this train leads to the docks, so you figured that this was your destination, even though you didn't know exactly what they were going to do there or why they were going there. You were ready to ask Johnny this for what seemed like the tenth time, and ready to receive a vague and useless answer, but Gyro wasn't willing to go through this whole process again and hurried Johnny off so that they could get the horses ready and buy the tickets straight away.  

You sat on the station's balcony fence, dangerously close to the tracks, intently watching everything around you as you waited for Gyro and Johnny. Louise was standing with her forearms resting on the same fence, watching for the arrival of a train further away. The place wasn't as busy as you might have thought; only two other passengers seemed ready to take the train with you.   

Looking at the machinery and the simple infrastructure of the place, you knew exactly what you were doing. You'd been doing it ever since you left Tuckertown and you were still doing it as you felt the rumble of the tracks come to life under your feet. You were putting yourself to the test.  

You had been analyzing everything carefully, remembering and missing the comforts of your time. You thought of all the gadgets and inventions of modern daily life as you stood in front of their most primitive forms. Trains, planes, taxis, the toilets in stations, with their swirl of nasty blue-green disinfectant, making waste and germs disappear at the push of a button. Restaurants, all with their Health Department certificates hanging, guaranteeing at least a good chance of escaping food poisoning by eating there. You also remembered your own home, the ubiquitous buttons that provided water and light and heat and cooked food.  

The question was - would you get used to this new life? Would you be able to adapt well without all the conveniences, big or small, that you had been exposed to all your life? 

You had been asking yourself this question every time you smelled the horses, when you had to look for sources of water to fill the canteens, when you saw Johnny holding a dead rabbit in his hands, knowing that it would be dinner.  

But time made no difference, you thought. In 1976, you could drive across the state and find people living without many of these conveniences - abroad, there were whole countries where people lived reasonably happily and completely ignorant of electricity, just like now.  

No, conveniences and comforts were nothing more than that. Nothing essential, nothing you couldn't survive without.  

Not that the lack of conveniences was your only problem now. The past was the most dangerous terrain anyone could explore. Even the progress of so-called civilization was no guarantee of safety. "Modern" life was, at the very least, more terrifying than its older versions. Everyday life could be safer, but only if the individual chose very well where to go - and you chose very well, even if the streets of Deanwood or Anacostia were as dangerous as any alley a hundred years ago.  

You sighed and turned to see if Gyro and Johnny were ready. There was no point in speculating about impersonal things like disinfectants, buttons and rapists. The lack of running water was just a distraction. What mattered now was getting home, whatever the means.  

"They're taking their time.'' Louise said, absorbed. "It really takes that long?''  

''I don't know.'' You replied, not very interested in their performance in buying four train tickets.   

''What do you think they're going to do?'' 

''What do you mean?'' 

''When we get to wherever we're going. I don't think we'll have a plan if they don't tell us anything... but what about them? They seem to know what they're doing, but they don't want to tell us. What do you think it is?''  

''They said they were just going to visit an old friend. Could it be someone also interested in the corpse?'' You snorted, leaning languidly on the fence. ''That's the last thing we need, if we want to get the corpse back. From what Thom and those two said, the Steel Ball Run was a complete slaughter because of it. Dozens of mercenaries, archaeologists, runners and even the government looking for the corpse... If that dynamic comes back, we'll be in the worst place in this food chain.''  

''Shit, you're right... what now? What are we going to do? We can't stop them from involving more people and we can't just split up either, that would be stupid.''  

''Now we just have to hope that this friend of theirs isn't a threat.'' 

''Hmm... what if we pressure one of them to tell? How about Gyro?'' 

''Oh, no, please.''  

''Why?'' 

''It's a long story. But he's not the kind of guy we can just pressure or threaten, believe me.'' 

"Damn... but talking to Johnny is like talking to a wall, he never says anything useful.'' 

''Because he knows very well what can and can't be said. And I'm sure that Gyro is behind these determinations.''  

Louise stared straight ahead and then turned her head like a pigeon, saying nothing. Curious, you also looked back and understood her erratic behavior; Gyro and Johnny were returning with four tickets and a larger piece of paper that looked like a letter. You didn't really care to ask about it as you were contemplating the idea of pressing Gyro and convincing him to give you some useful information about this "old friend".   

You looked at Gyro. Even without considering his clothes, posture and tone of voice, he was terrifying. Simply unwavering. He wouldn't hesitate. He wouldn't be afraid. He wouldn't surrender. Talking to Gyro was like facing an oncoming train.  

That last thought, however, was due to the conveniently punctual arrival of the train you were waiting for.   

"What a delay.'' Louise said casually to Gyro, not sharing the same fear as you. ''What do you need to do to buy tickets? A tax declaration?''  

''What?'' Gyro asked, confused by the last words.  

''Nevermind. But why did it take so long?'' 

''Buying tickets doesn't take long.'' He said, in a calm tone. ''We were checking my mail, to see if I'd received anything while I was in Italy.''  

"But you were in Italy.'' You said, forgetting your fear for a moment. "Why would someone send letters to you here, and not to your country?'' 

Then he cracked a golden smile, as if he was waiting for someone to ask that question.   

''Well, you never know... some people don't know I've left the country. Some girls in love, who couldn't forget me, maybe.''  

"Oh... and did you receive any letters?'' You asked, nodding at the letter in Johnny's hand.  

''It's none of your business, bambina. I don't want to make you jealous.'' Hearing this, you frowned as Louise laughed. There was probably no letter for him. "This letter was sent to Johnny, let's read it on the train.'' 

The locomotive's steam rose with a loud, irritating and indescribably rustic sound. The travel trains of that time were, however, very similar to those of your era. Divisions in open cabins with two seats for four people and a low table in the center. The table, however, was only used to display ashtrays and rest books, as there was no staff offering coffee or tea. A mere convenience on a long trip. Imagining that there should be no tables or benches in the animal wagon, you wondered about the safety of the horses there - but were soon reassured to imagine that Gyro and Johnny would never leave their beloved horses in danger, so you wouldn't have to worry about Judas and Vegas.  

The train roared its departure as you sat in the same seat as Louise, leaving her with the privilege of being closest to the window. Johnny had already opened the letter while Gyro peered over his friend's shoulder. You leaned forward a little, ignoring all your basic scruples to show that you wanted to read the letter too. Johnny's face expressed nothing but polite attention, tilting the letter so that you could see it. 

It was a strange letter, as if it had taken days to write, with unfinished paragraphs and erratic pauses, written in a cursive and flowery handwriting, made even more illegible by the eccentrically formal spelling and the total lack of familiarity between sender and recipient. The paper was new and clean and the ink was vividly stuck. Legible or not, the date at the top of the sheet jumped out at you as if written in fire: October 2, 1892.  

Realizing that you weren't satisfied with just a glimpse of the document, Johnny tilted the sheet towards you.   

"Would you like to read it? You seem interested.''  

You would have tried hard not to look hesitant, but the sound of Gyro turning over a tin of assorted cookies on the table didn't allow you to have the most basic of reasonings, clouded in authentic vanilla. He interrupted your silence and you just nibbled on what had been offered; your stomach was turning too much for you to feel any appetite.  

After a quick apology for your slowness, Johnny took pity on your bad luck and situation for what seemed like the thirtieth time. Then he reclined, looked at her speculatively and asked:  

"Are you all right?''  

''Yes, yes... I'm fine. I'm just car sick... train sick.''  

Johnny nodded, not quite believing it, but pleased that so far you seemed rational, even if tormented.  

Being tormented is rational, he thought, catching another glimpse of your situation until you took the letter from his hand and began to read, without bothering with identification or the ceremony of reading it mentally first.  

''October 02, 1892  

Jojo,  

Well. After picking up the quill and writing the single word above, I sat in front of it, staring at it, until the candle had almost completely burned out, and I still don't know how to say it. It would be a regrettable waste of good beeswax to carry on like this and yet, if I blew out the candle and went back to bed, I would have overlooked the eminence of a catastrophe, as I did two years ago.  

Last night, 'Ecclesiastes' disappeared.''

''Ecclesiastes? That's the name of the project!'' Louise interrupted.  

"It was the most discreet way we could find to mention it in letters.'' Johnny explained, looking at you, waiting for you to finish reading. 

You, however, were paralyzed by an intense Déjà vu. You had read this letter before, you were sure of it, even though it was incomplete. However, you decided to keep it to yourself.  

''Ecclesiastes. Neither the wise nor the fool will be remembered forever.'' You said.  

"Both will be forgotten.'' Johnny added with a certain familiarity. "Yes, that's right. Is it familiar to you too, (Y/N)?''  

''More than I'd like.'' 

''One of the officials I had hired to check on the corpse in my absence - a man I trusted, who had taught me the lip-reading that allowed me to know about the president's plans - told me that the corpse wasn't there. I clearly didn't believe him, so I had to see for myself. And I can hardly describe my despair then and now, as I write this letter. I immediately went in search of a reliable investigator to take care of this matter for me.''

At this point, the text was interrupted, as if the sender had been called away to resolve some domestic issue. It was resumed, with another date, on the next page.

 

''October 3rd, 1892  

I dream about Dio from time to time...''

 

"What?'' Gyro exclaimed. "Screw Dio! Who did she hire?''  

''I'd like to know too.'' You muttered, coming to the conclusion that a good part of the letter you'd read a few months ago won't stand the test of time.  

"There may be a reason for that... Johnny said, the tips of his ears very red, but he didn't lift his eyes from the surface of the table.  

''I dream about Dio from time to time. These dreams often take apocalyptic forms, and I see him here, in my home, but every now and then I dream of you and your life in New Jersey, and then in Gyro among Italian royalty. If you are even alive (and I'm convinced that my heart would somehow know if you or Gyro were dead).''

"In her words, Naples sounds more beautiful than it really is.'' Gyro commented bitterly. Her? So it's a woman. Yes, you know that.  

''Unfortunately, Dio is the only person I'm sure is alive. Alive as the devil. He, of course, is my prime suspect. But how could I hire someone I trust to spy on a man like him? That's when I realized that, at the end of the day, we're back to the same name I started with, 'Jojo'.  

That thing, for agonizing hours, was part of my flesh and my spirit. It broke my bones, tore my flesh and destroyed my reason. You, better than anyone, know what that's like. I'm constantly forced to deal with Dio because of my husband's work - if the obligation to deal with Diego haunts my dreams, the obligation to deal with 'it' haunts my days, Johnny.''

You paused for a moment, swallowed and continued with a firm voice:  

''I've been writing letters all morning, arguing with myself. But now the reports have been made, they've already been recorded on this paper and they can't be neglected. I've thought of all the most renowned investigators in the country, but none of them would be as reliable and as committed to this as you are. 

I feel ashamed, humiliated. I've failed in my only duty and I'm forced to turn to the last person I'd want to see my failure. Not just turn, but beg. Begging for guidance, for help, because I feel as powerless as I did two years ago.  

However, I still feel blessed to have someone to turn to. I can't involve my husband in any more scandals, because he's still carrying the painful after-effects of the attack he suffered. Not knowing what happened to the damned terrorist is also something that haunts me every day, every night. I'm blessed but cursed, Jojo. I've lost count of how many things haunt me and how many of them I'm guilty of.   

Now I'm almost at the end of the sheet and I think it's too much to start another one.  

I ask you, Johnny Joestar, not only as the man who saved my life and that of my husband, but also as a great friend, to come visit us, the address is on the back of the letter. Our doors are always open and I would ask you to leave my husband unaware of the reasons for your visit.  

With love and gratitude, from your affectionate friend 

Your voice faltered, as if your glottis had closed immediately.

Lucy Pendleton Steel''

You remembered where you had read this letter. Along with the files that Lucy Steel, the renowned geomorphologist, had made about Devils Palm and other related research. It was an old letter, not very relevant, at least not to the extent that you could decipher things in it the first time you read it. You were more interested in reports, soil analysis and seismic activity. Any other documents that weren't purely technical, you dismissed.   

But that one was special. You remembered reading it before and felt something you'd never felt before in your life. A déjà vu, a despair, a helplessness, a hopelessness.   

"We seem to be thinking about a visit at the same time.'' Gyro said.   

"We were going to see her anyway, but at least now we know we're welcome.'' Johnny added.  

''Nyo-ho, it's going to be a surprise when she sees me, isn't it? The exquisite hero Gyro Zeppeli, in the flesh!'' He leaned closer to you to peek at the letter. ''She hasn't said anything else about me, (Y/N)?''  

You held the paper for a moment, then placed it on the table very carefully. You remained still, your head lowered, resting on your hand, so that they couldn't see your face. The last glimpse you had was of Louise and her eyebrows raised almost to the roots of her hair, as puzzled as you were. However, they could hear her breathing with a slight intake of breath from time to time.  

"Is everything all right, (Y/N)?'' Johnny asked.  

''Oh, God...'' Louise mumbled, a little lost, not knowing what to do. Then she motioned for you to stand up, putting her hand on your back. ''Yes, she's just... she must be sick, isn't you, (Y/N)?''   

You didn't answer and didn't resist when she pulled you up from the seat. 

''Come on. If you want to throw up, let it be in the window.'' She said. "You're as cold as a corpse.''  

"Please, Louise, if I hear that word one more time I'm going to die.'' 

Louise was elated by that letter and knew that your heart was also much more worried after reading it. At the same time, you were still extremely curious about the incident that Lucy Steel had begun to describe, about the disappearance of the corpse. Well, who stole it? You and Louise? But that was in 1976. A terrorist? Diego Brando? That would explain why you found the corpse outside the bunker a century later - but even so, how was it taken out of the bunker? -. What if it was some flaw in the fabric of space and time? Well, Louise wasn't as willing to waste neurons thinking about this last alternative as you are.   

She took you to the last window of the carriage, where Gyro and Johnny couldn't hear them, but watched them incessantly.   

"Could it be her?'' Louise asked, remembering all too well the stories you'd told her on the way to the Devil's Palm.   

"Yes.''  

''Are you... are you sure? Is this the right girl? She must be just a child now...''  

''Lucy Pendleton Steel, yes. Pendleton was... it's her maiden name. That can't be a coincidence, Louise...''  

''What else do we know about her?''  

''Pretty much everything. She mentioned that her husband suffered an murder attempt... well, yes. Thom told me that promoter Stephen Steel was shot by a terrorist during the Steel Ball Run. Those after-effects are going to kill him in a few years' time. And Lucy... well, she's still got two wars to watch.''  

''Shit... damn, (Y/N), that sucks.'' She muttered, frustrated and not knowing how to react to this information. ''Should we tell them?'' 

''And complicate things further? No... I wouldn't want some crazy person from the future telling me when and how my friend is going to die.'' 

"Maybe you're right...''  

It was cold, so early, but sweat was running down the side of your face and you wiped it away. It's the right girl, certainly the right girl...   

You shook your head violently. Even before you were an archaeologist, you were also a historian - or had been. You, more than anyone, should have known how inaccurate history really was. But there you were, swallowed up by the swirling mist of the morning, having your ill-fated destiny crossed by the right girl. Lucy Steel, the geomorphologist who died in Japan, who had witnessed both world wars, who had archived everything said about the corpse and the Devil's Palm.   

"Shit... your mind must be a mess.'' Louise said, leaning back against the train window as you stared at your own feet. ''I don't know what happened or what's going to happen, and I'm already going crazy. But you... you know more than you should, don't you?''  

''More than I wanted to. But the only thing I know is the essence of the facts.'' 

"Essence of the facts?'' 

The essence of the fact, you repeated in your mind. Kings are fools, cowards and drunkards, but they had one virtue: they believed. Whatever their goals, from the colonization of America to the liberation of Scotland, they believed, they tried and the outcome mattered little. That was all that would remain in them. The foolishness, incompetence, cowardice and vanity of men are things that don't stand the test of time, all that disappears and what remains are glories sought - earned or not.   

All that remains, apart from the rigidity of bones, is the essence of facts. The rest is stripped away by time.   

''Yes. I know all about Lucy Steel, but I don't know anything about her. I don't know what her voice sounds like, I don't know what her face must look like now, her favorite color or the way she dresses. What I do know are just the facts and the essence of them. The fact that she was widowed and died before the end of the war in Japan. The fact that she will become a geomorphologist, who will be mere research material for me in a century's time. I know a lot, but I also know very little, and that's scary.''  

"You must be angry with historians like Thomas, aren't you?'' Louise ventured. ''Most of them get it all wrong. A hundred years from now Gyro and Johnny will be just two forgotten terrorists, while that guy... Diego, the governor, right? He will certainly be remembered, even in the universities.''  

''That's what happens with all the politicians here. But no, I'm not angry with historians... not them. I used to be one. Our biggest crime is thinking we know what happened, when all we have is what time has chosen to leave. At university we are conditioned to believe that artifacts and documents tell stories.''  

You heard a faint snore beneath your feet. The train whistled for more passengers.   

"No...'' You looked out of the window, observing the outside. This was already the second station you'd stopped at, and there weren't a decent number of passengers boarding, that train was practically empty. ''It's the artists' fault. The writers, mainly. But I also give credit to singers and storytellers. They're the ones who take the past and recreate it to their liking. They're the ones who take a fool and return him as a hero, take a drunk and make him king.''  

"Writers are liars, then?'' Louise asked, and you shrugged. Despite the morning chill, you take off your coat; the dampness molds your cotton shirt, revealing the elegant curve of your shoulders.   

"Maybe.'' 

Liars? You wondered. Or sorcerers? Do they see the bones in the dust of the earth, see the essence of something that once existed and coat it with new flesh, so that the beast soils itself anew like a fabulous monster? No... that's something archaeologists like you do.   

"Hm... but are they wrong?'' Louise continued. The tracks shook as the train started moving again. ''I mean... we're doing exactly the same as they are. Alleviating the facts, distorting some things for the sake of whoever or whatever. When Lucy asks about her husband, are we going to tell the truth?''  

''And what makes you think she'd ask something?'' 

''Do you intend to hide our... situation from everyone? She's Lucy Steel, she... she knows about the corpse and the devil's palm as much as you do.''  

''She doesn't know. She's just a kid now. Let's keep things as they are.''  

''And how the hell are we going to get help, when only Gyro and Johnny know?'' 

"You still can't understand, Louise?'' You said. You were a little annoyed, but your voice didn't change. ''I don't know, you don't know. Nobody knows. But you can't tell me that we should go around shouting about who we are, there's no point. If we do that, we'll be killed or they'll treat us like official clairvoyants, don't you understand?''  

"I don't know!'' Louise said, having to raise her voice when the train whistle echoed and the tracks rumbled beneath her feet.  

Almost a whole minute passed with a resounding, deafening noise that held you immobile. Finally it passed and the thunderous roar faded into a lonely wail as the last station was swept out of sight.

"Ah... that's the bad thing, isn't it? We don't know.'' You said, turning your face to Gyro and Johnny, sitting in the same place as before. "But we have to act anyway.''  

Then you turned to her again, her face haggard with fatigue, her eyes shining in the light.   

"We're going home, Louise.'' You continued. "I promise.''