#i just ate a whole lunch but already half a beer is enough to get me buzzed lol

[hale-of-stiles-heart]

had my lunch, handwrote 7 pages of fic, got back to the house, immediately grabbed a beer, got stuck in the kitchen while mom's lil bf got snippy with his daughter, halfway through my beer already buzzed

[engeorged]

The Restaurant Part Three

Turning the corner into the refrectory, Josh looked around for Dave. It was unusually quiet for a lunch time, with only a few students eating lunch. Walking past the serving tables, the smell of the food, caused some severe hunger pangs in his middle. He hung over the food, breathing deeply. Some cheers and muffled voices from the annexe of the cafeteria broke his daydream. He walked through and saw a large crowd hanging round a table in the corner. Making his way over, he notised a few of the rugby team in amongst the crowd. They seemed to be cheering some guy on. It was probably some dumb ass freshers having some macho drinking competition over some girl, but he was intregued anyway. He stood next to Ben, and leaned above to see what was going on. To his partial surprise, he found Dave, face covered in tomato sauce, guzzling down a piece of pizza. Several boxes lay down by his side, and there was just one left on the table. His gut was stuck out in front of him like an over inflated beach ball and was resting on top of the table. It was quite a sight to see. Dave finished the last piece and drained what was left of a bottle of coke. He glanced up and saw Josh and smiled.

'Hi big man! Just got a little peckish! hope you dont mind!'

'Not at all, looks like you were enjoying yourself there! You ready to go and get some lunch? I'm starving!'

'Sure! Lets go into town! There is a chineese buffet place open that we could put out of business!' Dave added cheekily. He struggled out of his seat and tried to pull his shirt down over his tight ball and failed! 'Oh well! needed some new clothes anyway!'

As they were going down the hall on the way into town, Josh and Dave went past the sports hall and looked up. There was bunting and balloons and a huge poster heralding 'The Grand Pig-out Eating competition 2003!!' They stopped dead in their tracks and looked at each other. Daves eyes lit up like fairy lights!! .

'Lets do it man!! It says a fiver to enter and the prize is £100 quid and a meal for 2 at that restaurant we ate in the other night!!' Dave exclaimed. As if to punctuate the statement, a low rumble from Josh's taught abdomen broke the silence.

'Even your gut agrees with me man! We'll wipe the floor with them with these fuckers!' He added patting Josh's blimp. 'Plus I am still not full, I feel as if I could eat a horse'

'Fuck the that, I want a whole fucking stable of horses!! Lets go for it man!!' Josh turned and made his way into the hall. A large crowd was gathered on the bleachers and a long table was set up at the other end for the contestants. The couple made their way to the table marked 'Registration' and joined the queue. They reached the front of the queue and the girl at the desk, without looking up from her papers asked,

'Name?'

'Josh Matthews'

'Oh, hey Josh! How old are you?' she asked, head still looking down

'21'

'OK, you are contestant number 5 if you'd like to . . . woah!!! What is that?' It was only then that the girl looked up and started Josh's 70 inch round ball, his t-shirt covering only the top half, revealing a good foot and a half of flesh, with its dark brown hairy treasure trail disappearing into his over stretched tracksuit bottoms. 'Man alive! what happened to you? You werent this big last week in Physical Chemistry?!'

'What? Oh this?' He said coyly 'Oh this is just a few beer pounds, nothing a week in the gym wont shift!'

'Well I hope your right!! that is huge man! You sure you wanna enter the contest? Looks like you've already eaten?'

'Oh yeah! I've had a spot of lunch but I've always been a big eater!' He replied, handing over his five pound note.

'Your call man! Good job though mind!! We've done enough food for 20 contestants and only 4 and you 2 have signed up!' She took the money and gave him a sticker with the number 5 printed on it 'Go and sit on the stage and it'll start in about 5 minutes.'

Dave registered and they went to sit on the stage. The other contestants were already on the stage and ready to begin. Next to Josh was Will from the rugby team. He was one of the guys who had helped him when he got stuck to the water fountain. Will was also quite a big guy, at 6 foot 7 he stood head and shoulders above the others on the team and he was good looking too, dark hair and dark brown eyes with rugged stubble all over his face. But he wasnt just tall and pretty. He weighed in at about 320 lbs and most of that was in his impressive beer gut he had achieved during his 6 years in medical training. It jutted out quite a way under his white rugby shirt and strained at his 40 inch twisted jeans.

'Hey Josh, Dave!' He nodded as the 2 sat down!

'Hey Will! Hows it going?' Dave asked

'Not bad, looking forward to this man! I won the past 4 years running you know! Havent eaten a thing since yesterday you know! Looks like you've done the same!' He joked stroking the tight curve of Josh's belly.

'Well, we're not as prepared as you, but we'll kick your ass man!' Dave laughed

'Yeah! Whatever! Been hearing about you two!! Didn't realise you were joining in with this though! Glad of the competition!! The others didnt look up to much! Might have to get a bit serious now though!' He laughed as he undid his belt and slid it from its loops. 'Looks like I won't need this now! Anyway! I'm up for the challenge! May the best gut win!'

The other 3 contestants who were looking nervously across at Will's impressive belly, were now taking double takes at Josh and Dave. The compare made his way to the stage and took the microphone,

'Ladies and gentlemen, welcome the the Pig Out eating contest 2003!' The crowd cheered wildly and held up their banners and started waving them around. 'Today's contestents are Ian!' Ian was the football captain and was 6 foot tall and about 190lbs.

'Contestant number 2! Brian!' Brian was much shorter but much fatter, he was a computer lecturer and weighed about 250lbs and sported a fat flabby gut.

'Contestant number 3! Brad!' Brad was the opposite of Wayne, he was tall blonde and toned. He was a typical pretty boy, with highlighted blonde hair and french connection clothes. There was no way he would pose any threat to anyone!

'Contestant number 4, Will. Number 5, Josh and number 6, Dave! There is our line up for 2003 Pig-out. You all know how this works, there are 3 knock out rounds and a final. This year, to try something new, the knock out rounds will be themed, they are all television and film moments!! Our first round will be . . . . the milk challenge from Jackass! Each contestant has to drink a gallon of milk in the shortest time possible! Can you bring out the milk jugs!'

6 girls came on in spangly tops each carrying a large gallon jug of milk, they placed it in front of each contestant and walked off stage.

'There is a bucket at the side for those who need it!!' Cheers went up from the crowd 'Contestants, ready, 3 . . . 2 . . . 1 . . . GO!!'

Josh and Dave dove straight in to their milk and guzzled greedily, unlike the other contestants, who were struggling through, drinking one glass at a time, Josh and Dave knocked it straight back, Josh beating Dave by 2 seconds. Looking around Josh let out a humungous burp which echoed around the hall, at which cheers went up from the crowd. Dave let out a mighty belch and turned to look at Josh, neither had even broken a sweat. Looking at the others, They found that Will had nearly finished, as had Brad which was very surprising, even more surprising was the small bump under his usually tight abs. Ian was just draining the last few dregs and Brian had thrown nearly the whole gallon into his bucket and was lying sweatily on the floor.

'Well! I think we have our first contestant to be knocked out, bye bye Brian!' The crowd clapped as the girls returned to escort him off the stage. 'I think we have an all time record for that round as well with Josh Matthews finishing in 18 seconds flat!! Well done Josh!'

Josh smiled and looked very pleased with himself. He felt the gallon of cold milk sloshing around in his gut as the lining cramped with hunger pains. Brad was panting hard and rubbing his belly whilst Ian was leaning forward and belching to make room for the next round. Will and Dave both sat totally calm, if slightly larger, and smiled with pride.

'The next round is taken from the film Beethoven and each contestent has 5 mins in which to eat as many hotdogs as possible! Girls bring on the trolleys!' the girls came back on with a trolley each filled with large plates of hotdogs. 'On your marks, set, GO!!'

Yet again the 5 tore into the food, Stuffing the hotdogs into their mouths with gusto. Josh and Dave, totally lost in the feeding trance, were guzzling two at a time and were neck and neck. WIll was struggling but was managing to keep up with them. When they were on 15, Ian was still on his 6rd and was looking very green, the memory of the milk surfacing in his gut. Brad had given up after 5 and was busy throwing them back up along with his milk into the bucket. At 4 minutes, Ian had stopped on 7 but Will, Dave and Josh were still eating. 20, 21, 22, 25!! All three had guts which were swelling up. Will stopped a minute to undo a button and give the gut a rub, his hugely swollen belly expanded to fill the space. Josh and Dave still racing ahead, 30, 31, 32. The whistle blew for 5 mins. Ian and Will stopped and panted for breath, Will undoing another button to make room for his inflated balloon. Josh and Dave totaly oblivious, continued to eat, much to the girls surprise. They raced on both hitting 40 hotdogs.

'Gentlemen! we've finished! LEave some room guys!' The compare tried! 'Girls, take the trollies away!' As the trollies were wheelied away Josh grabbed a further 3 hot dogs and stuffed them into his face, whilst Dave looked up and grunted.

Silence rolled around the hall as the students looked on shocked. Someone at the back started clapping and soon the whole place was cheering again.

'Well, ladies and gentlemen!' The compare continued 'I think we are gonna have a good contest today. Ian managed 7, Brad managed 5 but then threw up, Will managed a whoping 35 whilst Dave managed 40 and our winner of this round is Josh who managed 43!! I think its time to say goodbye to Brad!'

Brad was wheeled off on a wheelchair, still hiccuping. Ian was lying on his back with his shirt off rubbing his fairly swollen gut. Will had also taken his top off but was busy recovering by massaging his bloated ball with baby oil. Josh was sat watching all this, not really caring that his gut had totally snapped the elastic in his tracksuit bottoms and was covering up half of his lap. Just waiting for the third round. Dave was the same, his elastic still holding but his Gut had totally escaped the holds of his shirt, and all of the buttons were gone, and his protesting belly had escaped and was sitting there, its fine coating of hair glistening with sweat. Without moving, he belched and farted at the same time, both thundering round the hall explosively, each recieving a cheer. This also had the effect of shrinking his gut slightly but added the advanatge that there was some more room to be filled.

'Round 3! We thought this was going to be a real challenge, but looking at the size of our contestants and seeing what they have already eaten, i'm not too sure anymore. The next round is from Cool Hand Luke, each contestant will be given 50 hard boiled eggs to eat and it was going to be the one who eats the most or the one who finishes all 50, but I think that we may need to change it. Erm,' He paused, thinking, 'Well bring on all the eggs, we've cooked a thousand eggs, thinking we'd have 20 contestants, but theres only 4 left so just see if you can manage the fifty! And GO!'

Without hesitating, they dove in. Ian managed to keep up until number 30 when he dropped outof the competition, literally! He fell off his chair. His gut was clearly as swollen as he could make it and he never quite got rid of the slight green colour after the hot dogs. To his credit though he wasnt sick, he just lay there with his tanned ball jutting into the air, his pecs still visible on the top of the mound. His trousers had been forced undone and were unzipped all the way to the bottom, revealing to everyone that he was not wearing underwear. Raucous laughter went up from the crowd as the notised his flacid cock hangning out! Too stuffed to care, he just lay there groaning clutching at his hugely inflated belly. The laughter soon died down when they notised his ample size and girth!

Will was managing to keep up with Josh and Dave and at 40 they were all neck and neck. 50 and niether showed signs of stopping, 60, 70 and 80 eggs dissapeared down each of their throats and their guts continued to swell. Will actually reached 100 eggs slightly ahead of the other two and was in the lead, this was mainly due to the fact that he was eating 3 at a time and josh and Dave could only manage 2! At 150 eggs, will started to slow and by 156 he had given up. Groaning he fell to the floor, clutching his immense belly. He undud the last 2 buttons on his fly and let his gut relax, it expanded again to fill the new space. Audible gurgling sounds were heard by the first few rows.

Meanwhile, Josh and Dave were on their 200th and 206th eggs respectively, now totally lost in their feeding frenzies they continues. When Josh reached his 300th Egg the whistle went and the rest of the eggs were removed from the stage.

Cheers erupted from around the hall and the compare came up to the stage! 'That ladies and gentlemen has got to be a record!! 300 eggs, 43 hot dogs and a gallon of milk!!! Josh's gut was defineatley larger than ever. It must have been at least 85 inches round, and Dave wasnt far off. His gut was swollen enormously and was a huge round ball.

'We will now take a break and will convene in half an hour for the finals where our mamoth competitors Josh, Dave and WIll will compete for the big grand prize!!!'

[ialwaysgobacktoit]

Azriel surprises Gwyn for her birthday PART 5

Guys what have i done???? I'm so addicted to writing their story this part was like 5 pages long lol. I HOPE YOU LIKE IT and I thank you soooo much, your comments both on AO3 and here are really inspiring me to keep on going.

Also I created a Chapter List to organize the parts better from now on. You can check it out right here!

Also thanking my following supporters @katiebellf @madie2200 @starbornsinger THANK YOU SO MUCH GIRLS. I swear you get me so hyped to keep on writing this <3

Part 5.

Azriel couldn’t stop thinking about Gwyn. He tried not to remember her lips brushing against his skin, the way she spoke against his chest, the light pressure of her body in his arms. But somehow in a few hours since he surprised her it was proving harder and harder for him to focus on anything happening around him. And he was the Shadowsinger, for Mother’s sake. He needed to stay alert for a living.

“Az” Cassian called him from across the table. “Are you listening to me at all?”

The two of them were at their most visited tavern, waiting for Rhys to arrive. Azriel stared at his beer in front of him, already half-drank, and shook his head. Cassian snorted.

“I asked if everything went alright” Seeing how he still seemed a little aloof, his brother continued “Today. With Gwyn’s birthday present.”

Before he could answer, Rhys appeared right by their side. Greeting both of them, he sat by the table and joined in.

“What are we talking about?”

“I’m trying to get to Azriel about his birthday gift for Gwyn today.” Cassian smirked through his glass “But it appears he’s not very talkative, as usual.”

“Ah, it was today? I wasn’t aware.” Rhys asked with furrowed brows.

“Not many people knew” Azriel justified.

“And you did?”

“I remembered.” It was all he could manage to say.

Both of their brothers exchanged glances, as if talking internally. Azriel didn’t interrupt them, although he knew what they might be saying, because suddenly his interest fell upon someone across the room. Someone whose back was to him, ordering from the bar, her long copper hair falling loose behind her. His heart jumped a beat, even though he knew it was impossible for Gwyn to be there. She was enjoying the Valkyrie’s companies, after all.

Rhys followed his gaze to the spot across the bar, and chuckled quietly. It was enough for Azriel to blink and turn to his brothers. But in his mind, he found himself growing impatient to see her. He could picture her perfectly right now, sitting comfortably in the couch, probably in the House’s library, laughing and joking with Nesta and Emerie. She’d be flushed, from the heat of her drink or the subject of their conversation, and her beautiful, copper hair would be tied in a loose braid: just like he’d seen her last, but with a more comfortable outfit than her leathers. A part of him wished he were there with her. A part of him wished they’d never parted from that embrace. Because if she had just waited… Azriel didn’t know what he could’ve done next.

“Brother.” Rhys was smiling now, and Cassian was trying not to laugh. “How did it go?”

“Well.” Azriel forced himself to come back to the present. “She really liked it.”

“And?” Both of their brows were raised high right now, the portrait of amusement.

“And it was all. She thanked me, and that was it.”

“But she liked it? A lot?”

And damn him if Azriel couldn’t contain his smile now, as he remembered her face lighting up, her smile, her laugh, her hug, her kiss… Everything. He noticed something different in her posture during dinner, and when he winnowed back from leaving Diane, Gwyn’s eyes seemed to be shining from emotion. He was so tense waiting for her reaction that when she hugged him he was completely taken aback. But it felt right, every second of their embrace. Breathing in her scent, feeling her back against his hands… It just felt right.

“She did. A lot.”

He joined in a silent laugh as Cassian and Rhys smiled broadly, and the latter tapped his shoulder. We’re happy to see you like this, brother, they seemed to say, or it was his shadows whispering to him. Either way, he didn’t care. He was happy too.

*****

“I want to get out more.”

Gwyn blurted out just as soon as she, Nesta and Emerie arrived at their spots in the training ring the following morning. The three of them were late due to their birthday girl’s night, but neither Azriel nor Cassian did mention it. After his night with his brothers and current hangover, they weren’t the ones to say anything.

“What do you mean more?” Nesta asked as they both stretched their legs on the floor.

“I mean out of the library. I should have done this a long time ago, but now I think is time to release myself from Merril’s claws. It helped me a lot, I’m grateful for it, but enough is enough” She rushed the words, as if she just had to spit out everything she was feeling at once.

Azriel tried his best not to turn around and join their conversation, only because he wouldn’t like to pry.

“I think that’s great. Where do you plan on living?” Emerie questioned with interest.

“Well… I don’t know.”

Azriel chuckled quietly at her bluntness, hoping the females wouldn’t hear.

“You’re welcome to stay here at the House of Wind for as long as you want, right Cas?” He could feel Nesta smiling as she went on “Az?”

He turned around, striding to the three females on the floor, as if he’d not been paying attention this whole time.

“What?”

“Gwyn’s thinking of leaving the library and I invited her to stay here with us for as long as she wants.” Nesta repeated, smiling almost mischiefly. Azriel didn’t know what Cassian told her, but he fought the urge to grimace at his brother from across the room. Not that he’d speak a lot about it the night before, but Rhys and Cassian knew him too well to know something might be going on.

“Of course.” He nodded, giving his usual half smile.

Yes yes yes yes yes

His shadows agitated in excitement, and he controlled them the best he could as he stared at Gwyn. But by the way she looked up at him, and then at his shadows, he knew she caught up on something. He didn’t let his smile falter, though. He was happier than he would admit. And then she blushed. Furiously.

Azriel blinked, but she was already facing the other side of the ring. He couldn’t think much through it, because Cassian decided that was the moment for them to start training. And so they did, falling into their usual stances and going through the routines.

Everything just felt easy when they trained together. Correcting her, encouraging her, even taunting and challenging each other, it was all their usual behavior. Still, today he felt something else. Something he couldn’t quite put his finger around it, but nonetheless, he still felt it. It was that slight posture change from the night before, how Gwyn now seemed lost in thought for a few seconds when she looked at him. It was that same tension from last night, those seconds of silence where she stood a few feet from him at the dining room, her piercing eyes looking at his, before they hugged. Something had changed, and he really wanted to know what.

When training finished, Azriel was arranging the equipments on the training ring when he heard her all-too familiar voice.

“See you later, Shadowsinger.”

He turned around to face her, but she was already gone.

******

“So” Nesta started as she took a sip from her orange juice. “I’m thinking about inviting Gwyn to come over to dinner at the River House, this Friday. She only went to the Town House, and it was months ago. What do you think?”

Azriel, Cassian and Nesta were having lunch at the balcony in the House of Wind, and he tried his best to ignore her inquisitive eyes: eyes that knew too much, her sharp intelligence not missing a thing. Cassian nodded all the same, but Az knew she wasn’t asking her mate.

“I think that’s good.” He kept his tone neutral and stared at her inexpressively. His typical Shadowsinger posture.

But she only snorted in response, shaking her head.

“You two…” She muttered to herself.

Azriel kept in silence, and ate another mouthful of food. Cassian, then, seeming to realize they were having a new type of conversation, crossed his arms and reclined in his seat.

“What’s happening here?”

Azriel rolled his eyes, but Nesta quickly retorted, ignoring Cassian completely as she kept those cunning eyes over Az.

“I may ask you the same. What’s the deal with Gwyn’s birthday gift?”

“I did what you suggested me to do.” Azriel responded simply, but Nesta didn’t buy it.

“Please. You know that’s not what we suggested. What’s going on between you two?”

Cassian glanced repeatedly from his brother to his mate, highly amused by their topic of conversation.

“Yeah, brother, what’s going on between you two?”

“We’re friends.” Azriel meant what he said: indeed, they were. Even though he wasn’t quite sure if friends felt that difficulty in stop thinking about each other the way he’d been having during these last hours. “That’s it.”

“Keep saying that to yourself.” Cassian smirked as he and his mate exchanged a knowing look that got to Azriel’s nerves. Cauldron, he needed to get away from these two for some time. Not only because they were intolerable when they wanted to, but because he knew they were right.

And still, like magnets, his thoughts couldn’t stay away from Gwyn for too long. Couldn’t ignore that slightly odd behavior this morning, her blushing and staring. Was it possible she got embarrassed from the moment they shared together? Regretful even, of those minutes they were in each other’s arms? Or could it be that… Or could it be that she felt something else entirely, something his rational side was only starting to realize might feel for her?

And so, he got up to do what he always did when consumed by thoughts. With a grunt as response at those two in front of him, he went flying.

*****

He seemed to get home at the right time. After hours of brooding and soaring, brooding and soaring, his wings were sore and his shadows, restless. He didn’t exactly come to a conclusion about what he felt, but one thing he could admit: whatever it was that was going on with him, he liked it. He liked Gwyn, and what they had with each other. She made him feel… Peace. Stillness. In a way he never truly had felt before.

He thought about the night he told her about the necklace, all those months ago. How she could immediately tell what he was about to say when he mentioned Elain, and at the end she merely whispered “Don’t worry. I understand.” The way he knew she could see his relief, his shoulders relaxing at her response. Her gentle, sensible smile, as if she knew he was having a rough time, and could relate to that. Her understanding was all he was craving for at the time, and it made his heart warm up when he got it.

She was too kind.

And then that side of him attacked again, intrusive thoughts he was trying his best to control these last few weeks. He didn’t deserve someone to treat him like that. She could’ve pushed him away, she should’ve fought him. She should’ve yelled at him, despised him. After all, she was in her right, and he was that heartless monster, the one that got there too late that night, all those years ago. But for some reason, she didn’t do it. And their friendship only grew stronger from that point on.

He trailed off as soon as he got to the hallway, and saw a curious Gwyn follow Nesta through the rooms, showing her the place.

“Ok, so, I think you know all of it by now. Have you talked to Clotho yet? We can move you in right away.”

Gwyn nodded. “Yeah, I did. She acted like she was fine with it.”

“Do you need any help?”

They both turned on their heels as they looked at Azriel. Damn, that’s when he realized he hadn’t taken a bath since that morning. And he spent the afternoon flying.

But Gwyn didn’t seem to mind it, as she offered him a smile.

“No need, I haven’t got much to carry upstairs anyway.”

“Welcome home” He couldn’t help his relaxed, even slightly hopeful tone, as he threw her a knowing smile.

She huffed a laugh and thanked him. With a nod, he excused himself and went to his chambers. When he closed his door, he let his shadows run free, because he, too, shared their joy that Gwyn would be closer to them now. He took a long, hot bath, and when he got out and was getting dressed, he heard a knock on his door.

He opened it up to see Nesta with a triumphant smile on her face. He grunted “What do you want”

“Just so you know” She said by way of greeting. “Gwyn will be sleeping in this floor from now on.”

“You…”

“I didn’t do anything. She chose it, and the room she liked best was coincidentally that one” She pointed towards the third door on the left. “Hope you don’t mind.”

He swallowed, and that was the only visible sign he felt something about that information.

“As long as she doesn’t, it’s fine by me.”

“Perfect!” Azriel fought the urge to roll his eyes at her smugness.

But his heart rate suddenly went up at the thought of being that close to Gwyn. And he couldn’t deny that he spent the rest of the night way, way more aware of the sounds around him than he usually was.

[wikiangela-fanfics]

“You being there was all I needed” - Buddie oneshot

Yep, it happened. Buddie sucked me in and now I’m writing about them hahaha

It’s my first fic about them, and I’m not necessarily happy with how it turned out, but at the same time I kinda like it XD Hopefully, any new ones I write about them will be better haha

2k words, most of it under the cut cause it seemed kinda long haha

Ao3 here

Enjoy ♥

(also, shoutout @oliverstarkkk for reading and liking it haha your response to this fic gave me enough confidence about it to actually post it ♥ hah)

***

He woke up hearing faint sounds of conversation from the kitchen. He immediately knew that Buck had to come over, since he was the only one who had a key. Then he heard his laughter, which only confirmed what Eddie thought. The only thing he was a little confused about was why Buck was there so early. And why didn’t he or Christopher wake him up. 

He picked up his phone to check the time. It wasn’t even 9am yet. They had a day off after the 24-hour shift they’d just finished. How the hell did Buck get out of bed so early on his day off after a 24-hour shift and having spent the evening before with them?

Eddie stretched, putting his phone away. Then he sighed and got out of bed. He quietly made his way to the kitchen, where he saw Buck and Chris making breakfast. It immediately brought a smile to his face. Buck was so great with his son, and Chris loved Buck so much. 

Eddie leaned against the door frame, watching Buck put another pancake on the pile on the plate, while Christopher was sitting with another plate in front of him, decorating a pancake with fruit and whipped cream that could be seen all over the table.

“What’s happening here?” Eddie asked, and both Chris and Buck looked at him, startled. 

“Happy birthday, daddy!” Chris yelled, laughing. Eddie was a little surprised, as he kind of forgot about it. But in his defense, it was early.

“You were supposed to be asleep. We wanted to bring you breakfast to bed.” Buck said, trying not to smile. 

“Sorry.” Eddie rolled his eyes with a chuckle. He walked towards the table, leaning down to leave a kiss on Chris’ head.

“Happy birthday, Eddie.” Buck said with a soft smile, handing him a plate with the pancake that Chris was preparing on it. 

“Thank you both. You shouldn’t have.” he said, not able to take his eyes off of Buck, whose cheeks got a little pink.

“It was Christopher’s idea.” Buck shrugged. “Now, sit down and eat, Chris made them, I just fried.”

“Oh, really?” Eddie looked back at his son. “When did you learn how to cook?”

“Buck and abuela taught me.” Chris laughed. Eddie could listen to that laugh forever.

“Good. You can cook for me then.” Eddie smiled, taking a place at the table next to his son.

“Buck can cook for us.” was Christopher’s answer in such a tone, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Eddie looked up and his eyes met Buck’s. “Right, Buck?”

“Of course, buddy.” Buck smiled, his eyes not leaving Eddie’s. A long moment passed, with them just exchanging a fond look, before Buck cleared his throat and turned away to start cleaning up after cooking. “So, what are you gonna do today?” he asked.

“Spend the day with you two.” Eddie shrugged. That’s honestly all he wanted to do for his birthday. He didn’t care what they were gonna do, he just wanted to be with Christopher and Buck. “But first would you sit down and eat breakfast with us?” he asked Buck, as Christopher grabbed a pancake and already started eating. “We’ll clean up later.”

“I will clean up.” Buck clarified, taking a place opposite Eddie. “It’s your birthday, you’re not doing a thing today.”

“Fine with me.” Eddie smiled widely. He observed as Buck took whipped cream and poured like half of the bottle onto his plate. Then he poured some straight into his mouth before noticing that Eddie was observing him, and blushing a bit. 

“What?” Buck asked. Eddie just shook his head. He wasn’t going to say that he was staring because he thought Buck was adorable. And he was scared that if he opened his mouth, he would say just that.

“I want more whipped cream too!” Chris exclaimed, and Buck was happy to help.

Eddie just sat there, observing his two boys make an even bigger mess in the kitchen. Fortunately, he wasn’t the one who would be cleaning that.

***

They didn’t do much. They went to the park, played with Christopher on the playground. They got ice cream. They ate lunch. And then they went back to Eddie’s and watched a couple of movies. It was like their ordinary day off, but it was perfect. Eddie had fun and that’s really all he wanted for his birthday. 

When it got late, Buck and Eddie put Christopher to bed together, per his request, and then Buck was about to leave. But despite spending the whole day together, Eddie did not want him to go. So he invited him for a beer.

They sat on the couch, drinking their beers in comfortable silence, until Eddie spoke up.

“Hey.” he said, and Buck turned his head to look at him. “Thank you.”

“What for?” Buck frowned with a little confused smile.

“For today.” Eddie shrugged, taking another sip of his beer.

“We literally did nothing special. It was what we always do.” Buck rolled his eyes.

“Well, you and Christopher were there, so it was pretty special.” Eddie said, not looking at Buck.

“Just wait for next year. I’ll plan something really special.”

“Like what?” Eddie asked with amusement, his gaze back on Buck.

“Don’t know yet. I have a year to figure something out. But it’s gonna be awesome.” Buck leaned his head back on the couch and looked at Eddie.

“I’ll hold you to it.” Eddie smirked, mirroring Buck’s position. So now they were just sitting there with their heads leaned on the back of the couch, staring at each other. “But seriously, today was great. You being there was all I needed. You and Chris.” he clarified and swallowed hard, hearing how it sounded. But the truth was, all he needed was his son and Buck. They were the two most important people in his life, which was kind of crazy because he’s known Buck for such a short amount of time… but as cheesy as it sounded, he believed they were soulmates. He just couldn’t imagine what his life would be like without Buck in it. And Buck was so great with Christopher, and they already acted like a family, and Eddie wondered… what if Buck feels the same? What if he wonders about them too? He never really dared to let himself think that far, but what the hell, it was his birthday and he could daydream a little. Even if Buck was right next to him.

“What?” Buck asked, when Eddie’s smile widened a bit. They kept looking into each other’s eyes, and at that point that wasn’t even weird anymore.

“I love you.” Eddie sighed, lost in Buck’s eyes, and just content to be there with him.

And then his brain caught up with his mouth, his eyes widened, and he started to panic. He raised his head and sat up straight, looking back at Buck with horor.

“You do?” Buck asked, and there was a hint of something in his voice… like hope? He blushed and seemed surprised and a bit nervous, but he didn’t move. He just kept looking at Eddie.

“Yeah.” Eddie breathed. He figured, if he’s already said it, he can’t just backtrack now.

“Okay.” Buck bit his lip, pouring a bit of his beer into his mouth, raising his head a bit to do that, then leaning it back again and looking up at the ceiling. “Good.”

Eddie was confused now. Buck looked confident now, and there was a hint of a smile on his face. “What?” it was Eddie’s turn to ask.

“I mean, I’m in love with you.” he said slowly, glancing at Eddie. “And apparently everyone could see it but you. And me, before I realized, with some help, to be honest, like-” he started rambling, and Eddie cut him off with a kiss. It was quick and rushed, and nervous, it was like testing the waters. “Or we can do that, instead of talking.” Buck nodded, as Eddie pulled away to look at him. “We can definitely do more of that.” he sat up to put his beer away, and then they were making out, more confidently now. 

Eddie could not believe it was happening. He felt like he was floating. Buck was such a great kisser. And their hands started exploring each other’s bodies, and the kiss was getting more and more heated, with a lot of tongue and teeth, and moaning… God, Eddie loved to hear the small noises Buck made.

And then they heard a voice.

“Daddy?” Christopher said, and Eddie and Buck jumped off of each other and looked in the direction of the voice. Chris was standing there, looking at them with an unreadable expression.

“Hey, buddy, why aren’t you asleep?” Eddie tried to play it cool, but his voice was shaking and he was a little out of breath. He ran a hand through his disheveled hair and attempted a smile.

“I can’t sleep. Buck, can you read me another story?” he asked, and for a second Eddie thought maybe he somehow didn’t notice them making out. Which was not possible, but he could hope. 

“Sure.” Buck said, sounding similar to Eddie. Eddie looked at him and saw his red face and flushed lips. He wanted to kiss him again. “Just give me a second and I’ll be right there, okay?”

“Okay.” Chris smiled and turned around. “Oh, by the way.” he added, before starting to walk back to his room. “I’m happy that you two are finally together.”

Eddie and Buck looked at each other in shock. Why the hell would Christopher say that? They were pretty obvious to everyone else, apparently, but a ten year old kid? Well, he might have been more perceptive than Eddie gave him credit for.

“I guess I have to go read him a story.” Buck said, still not moving. 

“Yeah.” Eddie nodded. “I guess you do.” he took a deep breath, his eyes dropping down to Buck’s lips again. “And after you’re back, we will, uh, talk.” he said.

“Talk.” Buck repeated, sounding as if he has never heard that word before.

“Yeah, talk.” Eddie bit his lip, and Buck chuckled, leaving a quick lingering peck on Eddie’s lips.

“Sure. We’ll talk.” he got up. “I’ll be right back.”

And, well, after they made sure Christopher was really asleep this time, they sat down to talk. But it ended up with more making out, and promises that they surely will talk in the morning. 

They fell asleep cuddled on the couch, still half sitting, and their backs were killing them the next morning. Eddie thought it was more than worth it. Because now he got to kiss Buck whenever he wanted, hold his hand, just do all the couple-y things he had wished he could do. And he could tell Buck he loves him, and that was just such a weight off his shoulders that he was carrying for most part of the past couple of years. And the best thing was, his son was completely fine, or even more than happy, than Buck and Eddie were together now. 

***

“Hey, you know what?” Eddie asked a couple of days later, as they were cooking dinner together (well, Buck was cooking, Eddie was tasked with chopping the vegetables).

“What?” Buck asked, stirring in the pot.

“We got together on my birthday.” Eddie frowned.

“Yeah.” Buck looked back at him, an amused expression on his face. “So what? Are you scared that you’re only gonna get one gift from me?”

“No.” Eddie rolled his eyes. “But it’s not fair. Our anniversary should have its own day to celebrate it.”

“Anniversary? Wow, it’s only been a couple of days and you’re already a year ahead.” Buck teased, shaking his head. “How do you know it’s even gonna last?” he asked, but Eddie knew he was joking. They knew that what they had was special and they would fight to keep it. 

“Oh, shut up.” Eddie chuckled. “I just mean…” he drifted off. What did he mean?

“I personally like that it’s on your birthday.” Buck walked over to him. “That way our anniversary is just all the more special, because my second favorite person in the world was born on this day.” he hugged Eddie, hiding his face in his neck.

“Second?” Eddie scoffed, trying to sound offended.

“I mean, I love you, but Chris will forever be my number one.” Buck said and Eddie felt a fond smile tugging on his lips. He loved that Buck loved Christopher so much. 

“I love you.” Eddie said quietly, as Buck raised his head and left a quick kiss on Eddie’s lips. 

“So you’re gonna let this anniversary thing go?” Buck raised his eyebrows. “We can’t just choose another day, that would be cheating.”

“Cheating?” Eddie frowned, a small laugh escaping his lips.

“I would feel bad celebrating on another day.” he walked back over to the stove. “It would be a fake anniversary. Besides, one day maybe we’ll have one on a different day.” he added more quietly, and even shyly. And Eddie’s heartbeat sped up. Was Buck suggesting… that one day he would want to marry him? “But that’s far, far in the future.” Buck added quickly, laughing nervously. 

“Yeah.” Eddie breathed. They just got together, it was a long way to marriage. Although they were technically raising a kid together already… But Buck was right, that was way far in the future. That they will definitely have, because now that he had him, Eddie was not going to let go. 

“You done with that?” Buck gestured to the half-chopped vegetables in front of Eddie, as if the conversation didn’t happen. But he was still a bit red in the face. 

“No, give me a sec.” Eddie said, realizing that he was just standing there for the past few minutes, doing nothing. 

There was no rush. They had time. And they had each other. He could not be happier.

[ayellowcurtain]

I can be your lover

chapter 3

Robbe doesn’t think too much about grabbing his phone anymore, clicking on the name, scrolling through the page, clicking on some old pictures just to see him again, watching the new stories, Sander partying with his friends until the early hours of this morning. It’s part of Robbe’s routine to check Sander’s social media like it’s brushing his teeth or skating back home hearing his music.

He brought it to himself so he has to suck it up. Sander is more than well adjusted to his new life, his new friends.

The conversations that used to happen constantly throughout every day changed a few months back and are now just a quick exchange of texts every few days, nothing longer than ten minutes, and nothing too deep inside each other’s lives too. Robbe still misses Sander like he did when Sander first moved away but he doesn’t have the space to say it anymore.

It was obvious that distance would push them apart. They were too naive to think they could beat it.

He missed his opportunities time and time again. The ticket he had to go visit expired a few weeks ago and he knows it was the last straw for Sander to give up on them completely, no matter how much Robbe tried to explain and how many times he apologized for not finding the time or courage to go visit.

Robbe is terrible with words but he managed to say them when he felt it but he’s a disaster with actions and he didn’t take one with someone that’s all about actions speaking louder than words.

“Baby, are you busy today?” He hears his mom’s words like they’re on the other side of a tunnel. He looks up and she’s smiling, repeating her words now that she has his attention.

“No...No, I’m not really busy, why?”

“I was thinking about going to the mall and shopping.” He can feel her excitement in her voice. They don’t do this often: outings that don’t involve their doctors or grocery shopping. And his mom has been doing really, really good and Robbe thinks if he lost one for his lack of attitude, he shouldn’t do the same with his mom.

“Okay. Let me just change.” He smiles back and she claps her hands, leaving his room to go grab her things. The last thing Robbe wants to do is go out but he’ll force a smile on his face and hold however many bags she needs him to hold.

to Jens: Do you want to do something tonight?

I need some beers

He puts his phone inside his jacket to give his mom his full attention for the afternoon, hoping Jens has planned something for them to do by the time he’s back home tonight.

Robbe doesn’t need anything but he lets his mom buy him lunch and when she shows him this perfect black leather jacket that looks a lot like one Robbe used to steal from Sander, he lets her buy it for him too. He checks his phone but there’s no message from Jens yet so he texts Zoe, inviting her for some coffee with his mom before they head home. It’s nice to see her again and his mom loves Zoe so much but Robbe can tell something is up. Zoe keeps looking at him in the way she does when she’s worried. He doesn’t ask because his mom is there and he doesn’t need his mom in the middle of whatever drama Zoe is hiding from him.

On their way back home it’s colder than expected after walking for so many hours inside the mall, the sun is completely gone so the temperature dropped drastically and Robbe finds any excuse to open the bigger bag he’s carrying, putting his new leather jacket on, searching for his phone to put inside the outer pocket. He holds it tighter and the screen lights up, showing the notification of a few new messages from Jens.

to Robbe: No plans but you can come by if you want, play some video game

talked to Jana yesterday

She told me Sander is hooking up with a girl…

Robbe stops walking, carefully reading every message again to make sure he didn’t misinterpret what Jens was saying. He knows he should read this with the biggest grain of salt because Jana has moved back a few weeks ago and she barely knows Sander but in the back of his mind, for a reason Robbe can’t understand, he thinks she might be telling Jens the truth.

to Jens: How does she know that?

He can guess the answer - Britt and her big mouth - but he doesn’t know what to say.

to Robbe: Britt told her that he’s been sleeping with someone for a while now but it’s nothing serious

probably just a fuck buddy

he did repost stories with a blonde girl tho

Robbe leaves to answer Jens later when he’s home, and he opens Instagram instead, Sander’s profile picture being the first one available for him to watch - his favorite hobby -  and he clicks on it without thinking and there it is. Robbe keeps his thumb on the screen to freeze the frame.

It’s a stories of someone else that Sander shared. It’s too fast for Robbe to understand what’s going on but he stops when he sees Sander laughing, with sparkly eyes that are the sign that maybe he’s a little tipsy, always in a better mood after a few beers, his hair messy from what Robbe assumes to be strange fingers running through his locks and the girl finally turns back to look at whoever caught them making out, blushing with the brightest red lips and Robbe takes his finger off the screen and it’s over in the next second.

“Robbe…” Zoe is standing next to him, his mom a few steps forward waiting for them.

“Am I like the last one to know?”

Zoe presses her lips together, trying to justify not telling him about it but Robbe doesn’t really care. It’s his fault anyway. Sander has every right to move on and post it all over social media.

He shoves his phone back in his pocket and Zoe wraps her hands around his arm and forces him to start walking again, acting as nothing happened to his mom while they walk Zoe home and then go home themselves.

He tries to engage in whatever conversation his mom starts about picking which pizza they’ll eat tonight but his brain keeps replaying that quick clip over and over again even though he shouldn’t care.

Sander knows that he saw and he doesn’t text anything to Robbe, as he shouldn’t but Robbe expected him to.

He completely forgets about answering Jens and goes to bed right after eating half a pizza without noticing, turning his phone off, hoping he’ll wake up to some missed calls or texts from Sander, knowing it won’t happen.

The story is still there when Robbe wakes up the next morning. He clicks on Jens’ texts to finally answer him.

to Jens: sorry for disappearing last night, ate some pizza and passed out before I could tell you.

Thankfully, Jens is not online so Robbe won’t have to keep a conversation going when he’s still half asleep and in the worst possible mood.

He pushes himself to lie on his side, staring at the space next to him where Sander would usually sleep.

There were long months of miscommunication, frustration, and excuses because Robbe was too afraid of any change. He finally had the life he dreamed of, and two months after, Sander was moving to another country with no intention of coming back to visit every weekend. That change was big enough to paralyze him, unable to decide for himself what he wanted in their relationship. He thought they could maintain some degree of their relationship online while Robbe worked on himself but it wasn’t enough for Sander, clearly.

And Robbe couldn’t whine and beg for his attention so he kept his neediness to himself while their conversation got smaller and meaningless with time. The few things keeping them close are over now and Robbe can try to hide it all he wants but he knows it won’t be easy.

He clicks on another app that he opens frequently but this one just to look.

The airplane tickets aren’t too pricey, he just has to find one, buy and just fucking go there already! He can’t have another long semester letting the unknown eat his brain out. If he asks Sander he’ll give a too honest answer, cold without thinking about feelings because he’s hurt and he doesn’t care if Robbe gets hurt too because he brought this to them. Sander will be practical and Robbe needs him to be more considerate.

He stops scrolling when he finds a flight to Sander’s new town. His dad sent him his birthday gift in money and Robbe didn’t use much of it yet. Added with all the money his dad sends him every few weeks, it’s barely enough but it’ll work.

He buys the ticket before he can change his mind again and drops his phone on his mattress, looking forward. He has one hour to pack a bag and go to the airport. If he works fast enough he won’t have time to change his mind.

Robbe sits on his bed and grabs his school bag from the floor, unzipping it and turning it upside down on his bed to empty it, leaving the mess for him to deal with when he’s back. He doesn’t know for how long he’ll stay but it can’t be that long that he can’t fit in one bag.

If he tells anyone, as they did to him, they’ll end up telling Sander about his plans. Even Zoe would end up accidentally spilling the news to Jana and she would tell Britt. So Robbe tells Senne that he’ll need him to lie for Robbe for a few days. He needs to pretend he’s sleeping somewhere else so nobody will try to change his mind about jumping on a plane suddenly to go talk to Sander because of a social media post.

He’s the only one that won’t call him crazy or ask any questions.

When everything is planned with Senne, Robbe is finally done packing too, not giving himself even a second to look around and diggest the crazy plan he’s about to do, he’s almost late and the taxi is already downstairs, waiting for him.

He kisses his mom goodbye and quickly tells her he’s going to spend the week at Senne’s because he needs some help with Zoe. He’s out the door before giving a proper explanation or he would get caught in his lie, everything written all over his face because Robbe is that terrible of a liar.

The realization of how fucked his whole plan is only hits him when he’s already in his seat inside the airplane, high up in the sky, being offered some snacks that he declines.  

He looks so desperate, jealous, and thinking sex will fix everything that he ruined. He looks and sounds hot and cold and confusing and Robbe hates the realization while he’s sitting inside an airplane, with no way out to go back home.

If he gets there and Sander is living a married life already with his blonde dream girl, Robbe will have to find a way to dig a hole and hide forever.

He sits forward, finally able to see groups of houses again down on the ground. The pilot tells them they’ll be landing soon and Robbe rushes to the bathroom before he won’t be able to. He washes his face and looks at himself in the mirror. He’s not doing a good job at hiding his nervousness.

He won’t even have time to hesitate while waiting for his bag. Everything he brought is in the compartment over his head. He only needs to get inside a cab and go to Sander’s place. In two hours or so he’ll have to deal with whatever he planned so quickly in his head.

Maybe if he asks what’s going on, it won’t feel so desperate. It’s not unfair to want to know where they stand. Even if it’s a closure that Robbe is not ready to have. He settles for asking, as calmly as he can, what’s going on between them now that there’s someone else again.

The airport is tiny and Robbe is a little bit lost, wandering without knowing where he’s supposed to go to find the taxis. Sander's address is still saved in a print Robbe took of their conversation before they started drifting apart.

Sander had moved to a better apartment that he could only afford because he was sharing with a few of his friends. Robbe remembers typing, asking why was Sander sending him that if they were barely talking to each other those days. He wanted Sander to tell him they were still okay enough but Robbe didn’t send the message, just said the place looked nice, and took a screenshot to save the address.

He asks the taxi driver if it’s a long drive and he shakes his head, looking at Robbe through the rearview, “Five minutes, not much more than that.”

Robbe sighs, trying to make some breathing exercises to prepare himself. Five minutes is not a lot of time, not enough either.

He tries to keep himself from overthinking as he jumps out of the car, putting his bag over his shoulder. The building seems very new, modern even and Robbe wonders how expensive it is to live there.

There’s a guy behind the desk when he walks in and he leads Robbe to the elevator, pressing the button for him, letting him go upstairs by himself. Robbe found a way to mumble, after giving the old man all his information, that it was a surprise so he wouldn’t call Sander. He seemed to get it, smiling and Robbe was giving the directions: on the third floor, the door on his right was Sander’s.

He fixes his hair, adjusts his bag on his shoulder, and stares at the door before knocking, hoping Sander is the one to open it, not one of his friends or the girl. He should have told him he was coming, at least Sander would have time to hide anything he might want to hide but Sander doesn’t seem unhappy to see him at his door. Robbe doesn’t remember what he had planned to say and Sander is quiet too, doesn’t look like he had much sleep time or any sleep for that matter.

He can barely open his eyes, wearing his underwear and a black shirt and Robbe doesn’t wait for another second, putting his hands on Sander’s neck, pulling him down for a heated kiss. He licks Sander’s mouth open, pushing him inside his apartment and Sander slams the door closed behind Robbe, gently taking his bag off his shoulder, finally awake enough to lead the way to a bed.

-

Robbe snuggles closer and carefully lies on Sander’s shoulder. He obviously changed the order of things but there’s no escaping a conversation now while they’re both wide awake, lying in bed together. Robbe wonders if Sander at least changed his sheets. He has to know what Sander is feeling but he’s so afraid of the answer.

He looks up and finds Sander already staring at him, with a hint of a smile at the corner of his lips.

“You know why I came?”

Sander lifts his eyebrows, looking elsewhere now and he sighs annoyingly.

“I’ll be surprised if I don’t.”

Robbe looks down again, at Sander’s hand casually just on his chest, like he’s waiting for Robbe to hold it like he would any other time. He doesn’t because it feels wrong yet but he walks with his fingertips over Sander’s knuckles, wanting to hold his hand, kiss him, tell Sander that there’s no way anyone else is better than them and that’s why he’s here.

“So…is this like Britt all over again?”

He knows it’s not the best way to ask if Sander still wants to be with him and just him but he can’t find another way to do it.

“No. I broke up with Britt right after our first kiss. And I’m not dating anyone right now. So it’s different.”

Robbe looks up knowing he’ll find an upset Sander, he doesn’t ask anything else to not risk his luck. He pushes himself up and looks at Sander face to face, staring at his still reddish lips, and kisses him again, leaving the rest of this painful conversation for later

[petersasteria]

Sperm Donor - BFF!CEO!Tom Holland

Pairing: BFF!Tom x Reader (platonic), Pre-School Teacher!Haz x Reader

Requested? Nah.

This is inspired by a movie that I watched a month or so ago x

They're older in this one lmao

* * * *

Life is weird. It starts slow during your childhood and when you turn twenty, you get old really fast. Panic sets in and we all suddenly become aware that we haven't done anything significant or life-changing. That's the reason why people make weird and quick decisions like: dyeing their hair a crazy color or finally quitting the job they had since they were younger. Tom wasn't panicking, though. He felt like he's done everything and he's just relaxing while managing a company he inherited. You, on the other hand, were panicking. You're already twenty-seven and you haven't done the most basic shit in life.

You already traveled around, partied, made out with strangers, having one night stands and never seeing them again, dyed your hair, etc. But after your check up from the doctor, you realized that it was time for the next step; the more serious and mature part of life. Your best friend, Tom, was still stuck in the immature part of life and you didn't want that.

Both of you were really different. At this day and age, he still wanted to do all the things both of you did when you were eighteen. Meanwhile, you've been thinking about settling down. The only problem was, you weren't dating anyone. It was totally your choice to be single, but now you wanted that to change.

You invited Tom for lunch after your check up and he happily agreed. He hasn't seen you for a long time due to him being busy. He really missed you. You went straight to yours and Tom's favorite restaurant after the check up and ordered for the both of you while waiting for him. He was a little late, because he arrived when the food arrived.

"I'm so sorry I'm late, love." He leaned in a pressed a light kiss on your cheek before sitting across from you. He loosened his tie and smiled when he saw his favorite food. He glanced at you, "Thanks for ordering."

"No problem, Tom." You playfully rolled your eyes. You took a bite of your food and cleared your throat, "So, how've you been?"

Tom looked at you as he chewed his food and shrugged, "Busy as always, but I'll always make time for you, darling."

"What are your plans?" You asked.

"Plans? For what?" Tom furrowed his eyebrows. You took a sip of your drink and said, "You know, life plans. Are you planning on settling down soon or something? Are you going on dates?"

Tom scrunched his face and quickly shook his head, "Darling, you of all people should know that I don't go on dates. I prefer sleeping around with no strings attached."

"But surely you'd want to settle down, right? Like, get married and have kids?" You trailed off. Tom just looked at you and put down his utensils, "Alright, what's going on? What's with the questions?"

You pursed your lips and stayed quiet.

"Oh, you won't say anything? Then I won't stop staring at you." Tom challenged and Tom doesn't back down at any challenge. You just shrugged and ate your food. Tom gave you a sly smile and continued to eat his food too, his gaze not leaving you.

After a few minutes, you felt creeped out and groaned, "Fine! You win!"

Tom grinned in victory, "So tell me what's wrong."

"I want to settle down." You said sternly as you looked at Tom with a serious look on your face. Tom's jaw dropped in shock.

"Are you serious??" Tom asked.

You nodded.

He chuckled, "Y/N, darling, you're a teacher for kids and it surprisingly pays well, but aren't you sick of seeing kids everyday? Besides, if you settle down, I have no one to go to parties with!"

"But we're getting old, Tom!" You whined. "And kids are actually cute!"

"You despised kids when we were twenty." Tom pointed at you.

"That was seven years ago! People change, Tom." You sighed. "Why are you so against it, anyway?"

"Because you're my ride or die! You're basically my soulmate at this point." Tom said and you nodded.

"I don't see why that has to change."

"It will change, because you won't have time for me. Then when we finally hang out, you'll talk about your baby and shit." Tom frowned. "How can we attend that party in Prague next week, if you're settling down?"

"I mean, w-we can still go." You told him.

"How will you even settle down?? You're not dating anyone." Tom challenged again.

"Sperm donor." You told him boldly and he gasped. He was surprised, because he didn't exactly imagine you having babies that way. Heck, he didn't even imagine you having babies at all. He still thought that both of you wouldn't be settling down.

"Are you for real?" Tom whispered after a moment of silence.

"Yup." You breathed.

"Oh dear god, Y/N." Tom rubbed his face. "Are you out of your mind? Just get a boyfriend."

"No fucking way. I want kids now."

"Do you even have anyone in mind??"

"I originally thought it to be you-"

"No way! I hate kids." Tom glared.

"I know, that's why I changed my mind. I've decided that my sperm donor would be Harrison." You proudly claimed with a smile. Tom stared at you and laughed, "As in your colleague? Isn't that against rules or something?"

"There are no rules, Thomas." You rolled your eyes. "I'm doing this whether you like it or not."

Tom put his hands up in surrender, "I won't stop you. It's your body; your incredibly hot body. Are you sure you want to ruin that by having kids?"

"Tom." You glared.

"Alright, I'll stop. 'M sorry, darling." Tom snickered and continued to eat his food.

-

"Can you believe that she actually wants kids? It's so weird, Sam! You should've seen her." Tom said as he took a sip of his beer.

He was visiting Sam to confide in, because Sam was the first one to have a child. Sam looked at him and chuckled, "Kids aren't that bad."

"They're whiny and needy." Tom pouted.

"And so were you when you were a baby. All babies are like that." Sam said as he looked at his one year old son who was playing with building blocks on the living room floor.

"I don't like them. That's final." Tom huffed.

Sam raised an eyebrow at him, "Are you saying you don't like your nephew?"

"Okay, he's different. He's family and-"

"Yeah and your future kids will be family too!" Sam laughed.

"I just don't want kids, okay?! Why does everyone pressure someone to have kids anyway? I'll just be your son's undeniably rich and handsome uncle who's super cool and spoils him." Tom said.

Sam laughed so hard at his claim. Tom frowned as he looked at Sam. He meant every word he said. Sam wiped away the tears in his eyes and calmed down, "I laughed, because you thought you were handsome. Everyone knows I'm arguably the best looking Holland."

Tom snickered, "Calm down, Sammy boy. You're not mum."

"Touche."

-

"Tom! I'm so glad you could make it!" You smiled when you saw him through the crowd. Tom smiled and kissed your cheek, "You know for someone who's trying to get pregnant, you're not boring at all."

You playfully slapped his arm and pointed at the paper bag he was holding, "What's that?"

"A gift for you." Tom handed it to you. "It's weird how you're having a pregnancy party thing when you're not pregnant; not yet, at least."

You took the paper bag and put it on the gift table, "Well, it's not wrong to celebrate."

"That's true and we both no I love alcohol." Tom smiled and grabbed a bottle of beer.

"I'm surprised you're not an alcoholic."

"Same here, darling."

A few moments later, Tom was already drunk and he saw Harrison. He decided it would be best to formally meet the father of your soon to be child.

"Hey mate." Tom greeted with a big grin. Harrison looked at him and nodded.

"You don't talk much, do you?" Tom asked with a raised eyebrow.

Harrison chuckled, "I do. It's just that I can't believe this is happening."

"How'd she get you to do it?" Tom asked. "I'm curious, because if I'm being honest with you, even if she flashes her boobs at me, I'd still say no."

"Well, she and I really like kids. Then she brought up the idea and I thought it was cool. She then asked me if I wanted to do it. In my head, I said no, but the more I thought about it, the more I started to agree."

"And you agreed? Just like that?" Tom asked in surprise.

Harrison nodded, "Yeah. We even talked about the visitation arrangement and stuff and that she'd live with me when she's on maternity leave so I could help her around and stuff."

"Holy shit. You guys are prepared." Tom chuckled. "I'm actually impressed. Why don't you start dating and be an official family?" Tom joked.

"I would be lying if I told you that I haven't thought about it before." Harrison confessed. "But I thought she was dating you and I backed off for a while until I dated someone."

"Dated? As in like you're not with this person anymore?" Tom asked. Harrison just nodded. "Then you're more than welcome to date, Y/N! As her bestest friend in the whole wide world, you have my permission." Tom slurred.

"My ex and I kinda just broke up a week ago and it's still fresh and I don't want Y/N to think that she'd be a rebound." Harrison looked down.

"Oh." Tom said. "Well, thanks for not dating her, I guess. At least she wouldn't feel that she was a rebound.

"Yeah." Harrison smiled a small smile.

"Well, I'll go to the restroom, yeah? I'll talk to you later. As her best friend, I feel like I should get to know you more." Tom hiccuped as he stumbled away to go to the restroom in your apartment.

Tom finally made it to the bathroom and did his business. He flushed the toilet and washed his hands with soap and water thrice. No one knew why, but he's been doing that ever since he was old enough to go to the bathroom on his own. It kind of annoyed you, because whenever he was at your place, the hand soap you just bought is already half empty (or half full, depending on how you look at it). You had to get him his own hand soap whenever he was in your place. You even put a label on it.

After he was done washing his hands thrice with soap and water, he saw a little container with Harrison's name on it. He chuckled when he realized it was Harrison's... you know.

"So, these are his best swimmers." Tom drunkenly chuckled to himself. He clumsily took the container and opened it. "Did he fill it up or something?" Tom curiously asked as he took a peek. Due to being really drunk, he was unable to stand still and because of that, the container fell in the sink and Harrison's 'best swimmers' went down the drain.

Tom's eyes widened in horror and he panicked, "Holy shit! Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Oh my fucking god! Y/N's going to fucking kill me."

He paced back and forth in the bathroom until he came up with a plan. A stupid plan at that. He could've made up some shitty excuse that the container fell on its own, but he didn't. Instead, he cleaned the container and sighed to himself. He sat on the toilet and took out his phone to look at something to jerk off to. When he found something, he did his business.

-

Once Tom was done with everything (including his thing of washing his hands thrice), he finally exited the bathroom.

"Tom, there you are! I've been looking all over for you!" You smiled at him and dragged him to the living room. Everyone was gathered around and Tom started to feel like he was in a cult and you were the leader.

"Okay so, I'd like to say a few words." You started. "Thank you all so much for coming to this party! I appreciate all the gifts already. It's like a baby shower, but at the same time it isn't, y'know?"

Everyone chuckled except Tom. He was already kind of sober and he couldn't comprehend what just happened in the bathroom. You were saying something, but he couldn't understand it, because he wasn't focused. He finally snapped out of it when he heard Harrison's name.

"Thank you so much, Harrison. If it weren't for you, my dream wouldn't come true." You smiled as Harrison chuckled.

'Oh god. I'm so sorry, Harrison.' Tom thought.

"Lastly, I'd like to thank Tom." You looked at him with a bright smile. He couldn't help but return it. "Thank you for being supportive about this. You're the best. I love you." You added.

Tom chuckled nervously, "I love you too, darling. I want you to be happy and if having a baby makes you happy, then who am I to go against it?"

You grinned and pulled him in for a hug. Everyone around you clapped. Tom hugged back, but his thoughts were running wild.

'Oh my god. I'm so sorry, Y/N. I ruined it.' Tom thought.

The next day, he didn't go to work. He went back to Sam's place which was weird, because it was early in the morning. Sam was awake anyway, because he was cooking breakfast for his fiance and son.

As soon as Sam opened the door, Tom went straight in. "Um, sure. Come in and make yourself at home." Sam said sarcastically as he closed the door. He followed Tom to the kitchen and asked why he was there,

"I fucked up." Tom said.

"You always do, but what did you fuck up this time?" Sam asked as he fried the bacon.

"Y/N's pregnancy." Tom bit his lip.

"What do you mean by that?" Sam questioned as he glanced at his older brother for a second before turning back to the bacon.

"I, uh, fuck. Um, I don't know how to say it."

"Just spit it out, man!"

"I'm going to be the father of her baby." Tom spat.

Sam quickly turned off the stove and fully gave his attention to Tom, "What? How? Why? I thought that guy Harvey-"

"Harrison." Tom corrected.

"I thought that guy, Harrison, was the dad?" Sam asked in confusion and slight panic.

Tom groaned and rubbed his face and crossed his arms, "I may or may not have accidentally opened it and it fell in the sink and his sperm is most likely swimming through the pipes as we speak."

Sam's jaw dropped, "Holy fucking shit. Did you tell her?"

"Um, no? Was I supposed to?"

"YOU FUCKING IDIOT. Of fucking course you were supposed to tell her!" Sam gasped. "Sometimes I even wonder why you got the company."

Tom glared at him and Sam shrugged, "You need to tell Y/N or she'll murder you."

"She'll get mad." Tom whined.

"She'll get even more mad if she finds out after the baby comes out and it looks like you!!" Sam pointed out. "Harrison's fucking blonde, mate."

"How'd you know?" Tom asked.

"Y/N showed me his picture after you told me she was getting a sperm donor." Sam explained but shook his head. "Wait, we're getting off-track. She'll be fucking shocked and confused if the baby won't look like Harrison."

"Oh my god. I never thought of that!" Tom bit his nails in panic.

"You idiot!" Sam shrieked. He still couldn't believe it. The two brothers stood there in silence until Sam decided to break it.

"So, um, welcome to fatherhood?" Sam said but it ended up like a question. "You know, what if it doesn't work the first try?"

"That could happen?" Tom asked, a glimmer of hope in his eyes. Sam nodded, "Yeah. It's normal. She could ask Harrison again if it doesn't work and then you're back to your bachelor life! For now, it's time for the waiting game."

"Alright. Let the waiting game begin." Tom sighed. It was selfish of him, but he really hoped it wouldn't work.

-

"Tom!" You smiled through the phone.

"What? I'm kinda busy at the moment." Tom said as he typed away on his laptop and put you on speaker. "You're on speaker. Just tell me the thing you have to tell me."

"I'm pregnant!" You squealed.

"Oh shit!" Tom said loudly and put his head in his hands. His life was officially over.

"Tom?" You said. Tom's eyes widened in realization that he said it out loud, "I meant- oh shit! It actually worked the first time! That's- that's cool! Because you know, sometimes it doesn't work... the first time."

He quickly put you off speaker and pressed the phone to his ear. "So, what's your next move?"

"I'm telling the dad, of course! He'd be so thrilled!" You swooned.

"Y-Yeah! T-That's... yeah, you go do that. I'm really happy for you! It's all working out." Tom said, hoping that he masked his nervousness well. Thankfully, you were too happy to notice and he was glad.

"How-How will you tell him?" Tom asked.

"I'll buy him a mug that says 'best dad in the world!' or something." You giggled. "Both of us have been wanting this."

"Well, why aren't you dating?" Tom questioned. "I mean, he seems like a great guy. I approve of him. He's better than all of your exes."

Tom really meant that. He liked Harrison for you. He thought that both of you would be a great pair. He'd be lying if he said he didn't have romantic feelings for you before, but he realized that it was just strong infatuation. Nothing else. What both of you have was simply platonic.

"He's not ready to date." You explained. "But that's okay, because I'll be having his gorgeous baby! AAAAHHHHH I'M PREGNANT!!!!" You excitedly screamed.

Tom had to put his phone away from his ear so that you wouldn't break his eardrums. He was really happy that you were happy, but he couldn't help but feel scared when you find out that the baby was his.

He put the phone to his ear and said, "Well, good luck on telling him." He smiled, because you finally got what you wanted.

"Thanks, Tommy. Love you!"

"Love you too!" He hung up and quickly texted Sam about the news. Sam replied and texted: "Oh shit lmao good luck, daddy-o!"

Tom sighed deeply at his brother's response before drowning himself in work.

-

The whole time during your pregnancy, Tom found himself constantly checking on you. Despite the fact that you're carrying his baby, he still didn't like the idea of kids. It was a personal reason and he didn't know why. He was confused.

He remembered the phone call he got from you when you found out the gender of the baby. You were so happy and every time he thought about it, he smiled.

"I'm having a boy." You said happily.

Tom looked at you in shock for a few seconds until his face broke into a smile, "That's great! Wow. A boy."

A son. You're carrying his son and he doesn't know how to feel about it. As your best friend, you kept sending him pictures of the ultrasounds and you told him everything you were feeling during the pregnancy.

Tom did everything to support you, but in a subtle way, of course. You still thought that Harrison was the father of your baby and Tom didn't want to outshine that. He knew that Harrison would be a better father than him, but Tom wanted to be a father to his son too. It was then that he realized he wasn't opposed to the idea of having babies. He was just scared of having them and not being a good father.

But now, he has a son on the way and his son was in his best friend's womb. The person he loved and cared about was carrying his son. He thought it was amazing and for once in his life, he was genuinely happy and excited.

As much as Tom wanted to stay in London and check up on you and the baby, he had to go to New York for business. He doesn't know how long he'll be gone, but he knew it'd be awhile. When he gets back, his son would probably be walking already.

You, Tom and Harrison were at the airport and you were bidding him goodbye. Tom hugged you tight, but not too much, because he didn't want to hurt you.

"I'll miss you!" You cried.

"I'll miss you too! In fact, I already miss you." Tom said, chuckling. He pulled away and wiped your tears away. "Don't cry or the baby will look ugly."

"That's not a thing. You're just saying that." You lightly chuckled.

"Yeah so that you wouldn't cry and it worked." Tom smiled. He turned to Harrison and pulled him in for a hug as well, "Take care of my best friend, yeah?"

Tom was kind of scared to leave you, but he trusted Harrison.

Harrison surprisingly hugged back and said, "I will. You can trust me, mate. I'll call you when I don't know what to do."

Tom chuckled and pulled away, "Feel free to call anytime, then."

Tom didn't have time to say anything else, because his flight was being called. You frowned and said goodbye to him one last time. He waved at both of you and left.

𝐅𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐒 𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑...

It's been five years since Tom left and you haven't seen him since. During those five years, you managed to do a lot of things. You gave birth, you started officially dating Harrison, you moved in with him, nailing motherhood, talking to Tom from time to time, etc.

Tom was doing well. He was really happy with all the photos you sent him. He would smile at the photos, but the fact that he was the father of your son was still at the back of his mind. It's been five years and he still hasn't told you. He didn't know what to do, so he called Sam. Only Sam knew his secret, anyway.

"Hey Sam!" Tom greeted with a smile through the screen. Sam smiled at him and waved back. Tom squinted and asked, "Is that Harry?"

"Yeah! Harry's back!" Sam grinned.

"Hey Tom! I missed you!" Harry shouted in glee. Harry has been traveling the world for photography and he decided it was time to go back and slow down, because he was already twenty-nine years old.

"I missed you too, man!" Tom grinned.

"So, Tom... why'd you call?" Sam asked as he fixed his hair and moved a bit so Harry could fit in the frame.

"First of all, I'm coming back home tomorrow." Tom said.

"That's great!"

"We could finally hang out again!"

"Yeah and that's not all." Tom gulped.

"What's up?" Sam asked.

"Um, I still haven't told Y/N." Tom bit his lip.

Sam's eyes widened, already knowing what he was talking about, "WHAT?? IT'S BEEN FIVE YEARS, THOMAS."

"Tell Y/N what? What'd I miss?" Harry asked in confusion.

Sam sighed, "Tom's the father of Y/N's baby and Y/N doesn't know that because she knows that the father this whole time was Harrison. I'm sure she's confused after the baby came out, because guess what, Harry!"

"What?"

"Harrison's fucking blonde! And I've seen her son... he fucking looks like you, Tom." Sam said and Tom winced because it was true. He saw the pictures after all.

"Oh my fucking god, Tom. Tell her." Harry said in shock. "If I were Y/N, I'd be pissed you didn't tell me before."

"Yeah, that's what I said five years ago." Sam rolled his eyes.

"Calm down, will you? I'll tell her when I get back. I'll tell both of them." Tom said, mentally preparing himself and his speech.

-

You and Harrison invited Tom for dinner when he got back and Tom was nervous. He hasn't seen both of year for five years and he just randomly tells you that you and him have a child together.

You opened the door and squealed when you saw him. You hugged him and let him in yours and Harrison lovely home. It was just right for raising a family and Tom mentally cringed when he remembered his speech that he prepared.

"I missed you, Tom!"

"I missed you too, darling." Tom smiled softly as he took a good look at you. "Oh my god. Please don't murder me, but are you pregnant, by any chance? You're glowing."

You giggled and nodded, "Surprise! I'm two months pregnant now and I'm engaged too. Harrison and I decided we wanted the little guy to have a sibling."

Tom nodded, "That's great!"

"Thank you!" You grinned as you led him to the dining area.

All three of you sat on the dining table and all three of you were happily eating. Or maybe just you and Harrison. Tom was just poking his food around.

"I have something to say." Tom finally said.

"Oh, okay." Harrison said.

"What's up?" You asked. "You look like you have a major problem."

"It's about your son." Tom said.

"Caiden? What about Caiden?" Harrison asked.

Tom took a deep breath and took a sip of water before clearing his throat. He looked at both of you, "Please don't be mad, but I've been keeping a secret from you for years now."

"What?" You were confused. Harrison was confused too.

"I'm Caiden's father." Tom said.

"What?" Harrison asked as he looked at you. You looked at Harrison and shrugged, "Thomas, what are you talking about?"

"That night. Your pregnancy shit party. My drunk self did something stupid and-"

"What did you do?" You asked. Tom couldn't read the look on your face.

"I took the container where Harrison's sperm was and I took a peek, because I was- I was curious if he filled the whole container up and-"

"Dude, that's fucking sick." Harrison looked at him in horror.

"I know, I know and I'm sorry!" Tom panicked. "And then I guess I couldn't stand straight because the container fell in the sink and Harrison's thing fell in the drain."

Harrison's jaw dropped and so did yours. Tom bit his lip and sighed before continuing, "And so I cleaned the container and- and I replaced his sperm with mine, thinking it would help."

All three of you sat in silence after that. It was some news. It wasn't good news and it wasn't bad news. It was just... news.

Harrison cleared his throat and said, "I thought Caiden didn't look like me, because of weird genetics or something science related. Because it happens, you know? I heard that there's a really really small percentage that a baby would look different from its parents. Like, being ginger or something like that. So I thought it was that, but now that you said it, it makes sense."

You didn't say anything, because it was hard to process and it was hard to think that he probably kept it for so long.

"Caiden even got your hand washing trait. He has his own hand soap in the bathroom too." Harrison added and pursed his lips.

"Wait. Really?" Tom asked.

Harrison nodded. He looked tensed and you didn't blame him. Harrison wiped his mouth with the table napkin and gave you both a tight-lipped smile, "I'll just, uh, I need- I need some air."

You nodded and Tom closed his eyes and let his head hang low. Harrison stood up from his seat and quickly left to go to the backyard. You looked at Tom and frowned, "I wish you could've told me that same night, y'know? Before I did anything."

"I know and I'm sorry. I'm really really sorry." Tom opened his eyes and looked at you. "You were just so happy and then you had that speech and- I didn't want to ruin that."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner." Tom said sadly.

"You know, Harrison was upset because Caiden didn't have ANYTHING that resembled him. But he convinced himself that it was okay and it was this science shit that he mentioned. He probably feels like shit right now and I'll just clear my head, okay? I'll talk to you; we'll talk to you." You sighed as you stood up. Tom did the same. He didn't feel welcome. If he were being honest, it didn't feel right for him to sit there after he told you both.

"Thank you for telling us, Thomas. If you'll excuse me, my fiance needs me." You said softly and gave him a small smile before going to the backyard.

Tom looked down and escorted himself out of your house.

-

Harrison was obviously upset. The son he thought was his turned out to be someone else's. He felt really dumb, but he realized that Caiden didn't have to be related to him by blood for him to treat Caiden like his own son. He didn't see why that had to change. He loved Caiden with all his heart from the second he found out you were pregnant until now. Caiden was still the same Caiden he knew and loved. The only difference was, he wasn't the biological father after all. It was Tom.

Harrison knew you were kind of upset that Tom told you years later, but Harrison knew you didn't regret anything. Harrison didn't regret anything either. He loved taking care of you especially now that you're carrying HIS child this time. Both of you were very sure of that, because you two actually did it.

You still haven't spoken to Tom and Harrison kind of figured out that both of you were stubborn. So, he took it upon himself to reach out to Tom. He asked for Tom to meet up with him and Tom agreed. What Tom didn't know was that Harrison was bringing Caiden with him.

Harrison asked Tom to meet up with him at the park. He asked Tom if they could go for a morning run and Tom said yes. On the other hand, he told you that he was taking Caiden to the park for him to play with other kids. Of course, you agreed.

Tom wasn't there yet when Harrison arrived and he let Caiden join the other kids at the playground. Three minutes later, Tom arrived and asked, "Are we here so that you could punch me in the face or something? Because I think I deserve that."

Harrison smiled and shook his head, "No. My love for Caiden will never change whether I'm his biological father or not. And even if the world turns upside down, Caiden will still know me as his father."

Tom nodded, "I understand and I'm not trying to take him away from you if that's what you're thinking."

"That's good to know, because I don't know what I'd do without him." Harrison smiled and offered Tom to sit next to him. Tom sat down and waited for Harrison's next words.

"I just want to know what your plans are, because he's yours." Harrison said.

Tom shook his head, "Caiden's yours more than he's mine. I'm just a sperm donor if you think about it. But I do want to be part of his life. Maybe when he grows up, he'll understand. I want to help both of you in raising him and I want to thank you both for raising him well. He wouldn't be who he is without both of you and I appreciate that."

"I guess I just want him to acknowledge me as his dad too? Is that wrong? Because I can back off right now and pretend we didn't have this conversation." Tom added.

"No, it's not wrong. You have every right to say that, because you're his real dad." Harrison assured.

"But I can't take care of kids. Heck, I can't even take care of my own nephew before. I've always been the bachelor or the playboy or whatever everyone calls me and I've grown to like it? Like, I genuinely love it and wouldn't change anything else in the world. Caiden's just the cherry on top of it. I hope you don't mind, but uh, since he's kind of my son too..." Tom trailed off and Harrison nodded for him to continue.

"I fixed some papers and signed them. All I need are yours and Y/N's signatures... I want Caiden to inherit my company." Tom said. "No one else will have that but him and I'll teach him the ropes when he's of age and- it would be really nice to have an heir and Caiden's my only heir. I hope you understand."

"I do." Harrison said. "As much as I want Caiden to acknowledge you as his dad, I don't want him to forget about me and to start comparing." He chuckled.

"I won't do that to you or Y/N. I'll follow anything you guys say. So how will-"

"Daddy! Daddy! I found a snail near the slide!" a tiny voice called. Harrison glanced at Tom and grinned before looking at the child. Tom looked at where Harrison was looking at and his jaw dropped. Caiden was a spitting image of him and it warmed his heart.

"Caiden, buddy, I want you to meet uncle Tom." Harrison pulled the four year old to sit on his lap and ran his fingers through the child's hair.

Tom looked at him and smiled and he teared up a bit, "Hey buddy."

"Hi! I like your shirt." Caiden gave him a toothy grin. Tom looked down at his shirt before looking at Caiden, "You can have it when you're older."

Caiden's eyes widened and looked at Harrison who chuckled, "What'll you say, Caiden?"

"Thank you!" Caiden giggled. "I'll play again. Bye!" With that, Caiden got off from Harrison's lap and went back to play with his new friends.

Tom couldn't believe what just happened. Harrison said, "He knows we don't look alike, by the way. He doesn't seem to mind, though. But I know we should tell him as early as now that you're his real dad."

"I'm not opposed with that idea." Tom admitted. The two of them watched Caiden as they changed the topic and talked about life.

𝐀 𝐅𝐄𝐖 𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐇𝐒 𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑...

You and Harrison finally told Caiden the truth. Tom was present, of course. He wanted to see how Caiden will react. Caiden didn't see anything bad about it, though. He loved it even more.

"So, uncle Tom is my real daddy?" Caiden asked one more time and all three of you nodded. Caiden grinned and said, "I have two daddies?"

"Well... yeah." You said with a shrug.

"That's cool!" Caiden giggled. He looked at Tom and pointed at Harrison as he did so, "I call my daddy already. What will I call you?"

"Anything you want." Tom said, not really bothered if he still calls him 'uncle Tom' or not.

"I'll call you papa." Caiden smiled and hugged him. Tom looked at you and Harrison in surprise and both of you just urged him to return the gesture because he wasn't sure.

Tom hugged back and it felt nice. He felt great. He then made a mental note to himself to hug his nieces and nephews.

From then on, all three of you agreed that Tom would have Caiden during Friday until Sunday and on some occasions when you and Harrison were busy. All three of you also agreed that there would be days when all four of you would go out to really bond.

You didn't really wish to have a family like this, but you did and if you were being honest, you wouldn't trade it for anything else in the world.

* * * *

this is the longest fic I've written here so far omg but i hope y'all liked it

𝐓𝐎𝐌 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @abrielleholland​​​​ @poguesholland​​​ @superheroesaremytea​​  @marshxx​ @ella-whyte

𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @marvelousell​​​ @justasmisunderstoodasloki​ @rubberducky-jrr​ @petersholland​ @osterfieldnholland​ @miraclesoflove

[kittybellestark]

Straightening Things Out

Part 2

Hey everyone so this is going to be a two part fic, tumblr told me I hit my limit soooo. 

This is the long awaiting MayxSkip with Bi!Peter fic I’ve been talking about, idk how long a 2nd part will take but I already have a bit written, which is super nice. Uh, yeah, this is heavy stuff, so prepare your hearts, bc mine hurts

TW: homophobia, depression, self harm, homophobic slurs, eating disorder (?), abuse, sexual assault, thoughts of suicide, questioning sexuality, alcohol

He’s not sure how he got here.

Well, he knows, but he just doesn’t understand it.

A year ago Peter was trying to get May with Happy. It seemed logical and safe. May wanted to get back into the dating pool, and while Peter was hesitant about the idea of May being with anyone other than Ben, he felt like Happy could be a good person for her to be with. That was safe, controlled even.

Pushing for May to be with Happy seemed like the right step. Supporting May in her decision to start seeing people again also make sense. Now, Peter regrets it. He should have told her no. That he wasn’t ready or comfortable with that.

He doesn’t understand why he’s in the bathroom cleaning up his own blood. He didn’t even go out as Spider-Man. Peter hates May’s new boyfriend.

Skip wasn’t safe. He wasn’t very kind either. And there was just something about him bothered Peter. And yet when Peter tried to talk to May about it, the complaints weren’t heard or taken seriously.

May doesn’t understand that Skip is a danger, and Peter can’t really talk to people about this.

Six months ago…

“Hey Happy.” Peter smiles jumping into the black ‘inconspicuous’ Audi.

“Hi Pete.”

After a few minutes of talking the conversation finally turns.

“How’s your aunt.”

Peter snorts, rolling his eyes. “She thinks she’s doing great. Still with Skip, he lives with us now. May isn’t very happy that Skip and I aren’t getting along too well though. She thinks that I have a problem with seeing her with other men, amongst other things.”

“Sounds like you don’t like him. I didn’t even think that was possible, you’re like a lab.” Happy chuckled.

“I resent that. I don’t like a lot of people who I don’t need to disclose to you. I was just expecting her to get with someone else, someone who was less I don’t know, just less.”

“You and me both kid. You and me both.”

-

Five and a half months ago…

Peter and May were making dinner together, the radio was playing softly and Skip was sitting in the dining room, beer in hand, listening to Peter and May’s conversation.

“How was school, baby?” May asked.

Peter hums as he chops some carrots. “There’s a new transfer at school. From Tennessee, he even lives with Mr. Stark.”

May pauses mixing the stir fry they were attempting to make. She smiles at Peter an eyebrow raised, waving the spatula at him.

“Is he cute?” She asked in a song-song voice.

Peter rolls his eyes with a smile. He sticks out his tongue, flicking some water at May. Skip watches with a smirk on his face.

“Yeah, yeah he’s really cute. Blond hair, blue eyes, southern charm and he’s so smart too. And tall. May, he’s also like muscular too, his arms? He used to work in a mechanic shop where he grew up, he could probably bench press me without breaking a sweat.”

“Sounds like you have a crush!” May squealed pulling Peter into a hug.

“You have a crush on a man? Are you gay?” Skip huffed with a laugh.

“Bisexual, actually.” Peter deadpanned. “Is that a problem?”

“No, no, not at all. Just surprised.” Skip laughed.

-

Five months ago...

May was at work, it was just Peter and Skip at home. Peter was in his room, the door was closed over, and Skip in the living room watching a sports game and drinking some beer.

While this wasn’t the most common occurrence, it wasn’t necessarily uncommon either. Peter would stay in his room and do homework or play some sort of online video game with Ned, Harley and MJ, typically Minecraft but sometimes they chose something else. Skip would watch sports or the news, but never a reliable source, always the Daily Bugle or Fox News.

Today was supposed to be like every other time. Peter was supposed to be in his room and Skip in the living room. But then Skip was in his room with him. Peter felt uneasy. It just didn’t sit right with him having the older man in his room.

“I think we need to talk, Pete.” Skip said sitting on Peter’s bed, while Peter stayed sitting at his desk.

“Sure, what about?” Peter tried to sound pleasant and kind, doing this for May.

“Well, I’ve been trying to broach this subject with you gently, but May and I have spoken about how we can cure you.”

Skip had the decency to look somber. His shoulders hunched forward, frowning. His eyes held remorse and regret. It only seemed to enrage Peter.

“Cure me? As far as I was concerned I was perfectly healthy.” Peter couldn’t help but snort.

“Of your sin, Peter. You like men, and we know that we have to cure you of it.”

It felt like all of the air had been taken out of his lungs. His heart stopped and the world blurred for a moment before Peter shook himself out of it. He pushed himself up out of his chair trying to back himself up, away from Skip. This wasn’t right. This was really wrong.

“May accepts me. She said so. She’s always supported me and accepted that I’m bi.”

“She didn’t know how to tell you she didn’t. She was crying quite a bit. May just didn’t know how to tell you. So she asked me to help fix you.”

Skip got up from the bed, walking over to Peter, trapping Peter in. Skip put an arm on each side of Peter’s body, resting his hands on the wall behind Peter. Peter felt trapped, his eyes wide as he looked around unsure of what he could do. May and Skip thought he was sick.

“She can’t-“ Peter cried, tears coming to his eyes. He didn’t want to accept it. This couldn’t be happening.

Skip put a hand on his shoulder.

“She does, Einstein, but it’s okay because I’ll fix you.”

-

Peter sat at their usual lunch table, Ned next to him, MJ, kiddie-corner to him and Harley across from him. His leg was bouncing as they all ate, but he couldn’t do more then push his food around his tray.

“There’s nothing wrong with me being bisexual right? Like, I’m still normal, I’m not sick or anything for liking more than just women right?”

It used to be old-hat for MJ and Ned to have to reassure Peter that being bisexual is okay. It was just last year that Peter finally started to feel secure in his sexuality and not question whether he was normal or not. It just always felt like Peter was faking his attraction to other genders.  

The group became silent with shock. None of them were prepared for Peter to have any insecurities about his sexuality, and it certainly wasn’t something that Harley was there to witness. It had been such a long time since he voiced this doubt. Ned and MJ gave each other looks, while Harley sat there starring at Peter slack-jawed.

“Sorry. I’ve just been in my own head recently. Bisexuality is valid and so am I. I know, I’m sorry, I just- what if I’ve been lying to myself this whole time? I’m sorry, I know I’m being silly.”

There was another moment of silence before Harley grabbed Peter’s hand.

“It’s not silly to question you’re own sexuality, Peter. Being bisexual is hard because people always try to invalidate you and tell you to just choose. It’s okay to be confused. Prefaces change from day to day and it is so confusing sometimes. We’re your people, we’re here for you no matter how you identify.” Harley smiled, something sad and soft.

-

Four and a half months ago...

Peter was trying to sleep. It wasn’t coming easily anymore. Skip and May were in the next room over. He should be able to sleep. But nothing felt right. Everything was always off, never normal, almost safe. It didn’t feel good.

There was the sound of footsteps in the hall before Peter’s door opened and closed. Peter tried to pretend to sleep, but the footsteps came closer to him then Skip’s hand was on his shoulder.

“Hey Einstein. I’ve got something for you.” Skip whispered, getting Peter’s eyes to open.

Peter pushed himself up and into the top corner of his bed, knees drawn to his chest. He really hated Skip. Hated his deep voice and pointy chin and crooked nose. He hated Skip’s receding hairline and beer belly. Peter hated Skip and everything about him. But mostly Peter hated that Skip and May knew there was something wrong with him.

Skip dropped some razors onto the bed. All loose and brand new. Peter looked at Skip like he was crazy. It was too late at night to register this.

“May and I were talking again. Anytime you have a sinful thought, any homosexual thoughts or desires just give yourself a cut. Obviously don’t do it in front of anyone other than me, but this should help bleed the faggot out of you.”

Peter gasped, eyes wide and shaking his head. He didn’t want to do this. Cutting himself was not something Peter ever wanted to start doing again. He got away from it, he recovered, and now the blades are being provided to him. Peter is being expected to cut this time. 

“I can’t do that. Anything but that Skip, please.”

Peter didn’t realize the tears that were pouring down his face, or how hard it was to breath. If it wasn’t for Skip wiping the tears from Peter’s face, he probably wouldn’t have noticed.

“Hey, no, no it’s okay, Einstein, it’s not as bad as it seems okay, look,” Skip took Peter’s wrist slicing it a few times, just enough to bring up blood up before handing the razor to Peter, “See? Nice and easy. Now I’m not going to leave until I see you try okay?”

Peter nodded, bringing the razor down on his skin and breathing a sigh of release as he broke his own skin.

-

Tony dropped food in front of Peter, two burgers and fries, before sitting down beside him. They were finally watching a movie after spending time in the lab and now Harley would be joining them too.

“Kid, we’ve talked about your eating habits. You need to eat more than a regular person. I don’t like seeing you lose weight this fast. I just like to see you happy and healthy.”

Peter knew he should say something. The razor in his pocket wasn’t normal and he should tell Tony. And his need to cut every time he thought about Harley, or the need to cut when he realized he was playing into Skips hands. But Peter didn’t want to lose his little therapeutic treatment again. He could do better at hiding it this time, especially with his healing factor now. Peter could keep this.

It’s his little secret with Skip. Peter could keep it safe. It made him feel better, and that’s what everyone wants, right?

“Oh yeah, sorry, I’ve just had a smaller appetite recently, I’ll do better, promise.” Peter nodded with a smile.

At that moment Harley walked into the room, giving Peter a crooked smile, a blush painted across his cheeks.

Peter would have to cut later, for thinking about Harley like that, and for doing what Skip told him and also for scarring Tony. Peter deserved this.

-

Four months ago…

Peter and Skip were alone together again.

It seemed to become more common now. Or maybe Peter was just getting used to having Skip try and cure him. He hated himself for wanting it to work. Peter just didn’t like himself much anymore.

“Einstein,” Skip slurred, “are you still a faggot?”

Peter flushed with shame, nodding. Peter really hated Skip for making him feel like this. For feeling shame for being bisexual and wishing he were straight. Peter hated himself a lot. He just wanted to be better.

“Shame, thought I’d have you straightened out by now. May is going to be disappointed to know you’re still a homo. I’ll have to start getting more aggressive with your treatments.”

Peter shook his head. He was already so tired, and he just wanted to feel safe in his home. He just needed to do what Skip and May wanted and then they’ll like him. All Peter needed to do was be straight, no matter what. He’s doing the right thing.

“How much more?” Peter’s voice cracked.

“As much as it takes to turn you straight.” Skip smiled.

He now gripped Peter’s face in both hands, thumbs on his cheeks. Skip used the hold he had on Peter to bring him towards the bathroom doorframe- the only metal frame in the house.

Peter didn’t fight. He was doing this for May. May wants him straight and wants Skip to do it. Peter scratched at his legs, where most of the cuts were, hoping that would convince Skip from stopping whatever he was doing. But it didn’t, of course it didn’t. Why would it convince Skip, when he’s only doing what’s best for better?

With his hold on Peter’s head, Skip jerked Peter’s head into the doorframe, with enough force to make Peter forget how to stand. Peter was only being held up by Skip's grip on his head when Skip lifted up his knee, forcing it into Peter’s stomach.

Peter groaned with the impact and Skip let him go and Peter fell to the ground. He barely managed to catch himself, resting his forehead on the cool floor. There was barely a moment before an on slate of kicks were delivered to Peter.

“No,” Peter sobbed, “stop, please, stop, stop, you’re hurting me.”

It was another few moments before Skip stopped kicking him with a huff. Skip sat down on the ground, putting a hand on Peter’s shoulder to comfort the boy. Peter continued to sob, barely able to support his own weight to get himself sitting.

“Einstein, I just want you to know that I don’t like doing this. I don’t want to do this, but May and I agreed that I have to do this. I’m sorry Einstein, but it’s for your own good.”

Skip pulled Peter onto his lap, rubbing Peter’s back to bring him some comfort. Peter relaxed into Skip’s hold when he realized that there wasn’t going to be more pain. They sat there for a while before Skip finally stood up, as Peter’s sobs were finally ending, bringing Peter to his room and tucking Peter into bed.

-

“Peter I’m worried about you.” MJ said after Academic Decathlon practice.

Peter was wide eyed, holding his book bag in front of him, using it as a shield. His clothing that used to only be a little bit large on him, now swallowed him completely, his cheekbones were sharper and anytime his sweater moved a little bit, his collar bone was revealed to be protruding from his chest. Peter flinched at people who moved too fast and his skin was pale with dark bags under his eyes.

“I’m okay MJ.” Peter smiled, but his eyes were still empty.

“Are you cutting again? You’re acting like you used too. I don’t like seeing you lose your spark.”

MJ moved forward, grabbing Peter’s hands in her own. His hands were cold against hers and shaking slightly. Her head tilted just a bit as she searched for answers on Peter’s face.

“I’m not- no, I moved past that.” Peter lied.

He couldn’t tell her. He needed to cut. He needed the freedom it gave him, the relief. It was one of the only things he had anymore that he still enjoyed. By telling MJ, Peter would lose his sanity. Everything would be okay as long as he had a razor on him, as long as he got to cut his skin open.

But he should tell her. Maybe that would get everything to end. If he just told someone, maybe Skip would stop hurting him. Or maybe they’d push for Skip to continue on with trying to cure him. This was for the best, after all.

“Peter, you’re one of my best friends, okay? So if you were cutting again, hypothetically speaking, know that you can come to me, I won’t tell anyone. Not even May or my parents.”

Peter nodded, looking away from her, hating himself for lying and hating that MJ was trying so hard. It would have been so much easier if he just liked MJ instead of Harley.

“Look, look, MJ, see no cuts,” Peter rolled up his sleeves to show healed skin and no scars, “I promise, I’m just a little stressed out right now, don’t worry about me. I’m just focusing on myself for now, I’ll be okay.”

“Okay, well, when is the last time you ate?”

“Right before practice.”

It felt nice for Peter to actually tell the truth. He was eating almost as much as usual. Typically the same amount unless he had time alone with Skip. Peter was just stressed and sometimes couldn’t keep his food down, but he still ate more than enough. He should be able to keep up his weight, the weight loss just sort of happened.

-

Three and a half months ago…

May was working the overnight shift again. It was a school night so Peter was at the apartment with Skip instead of the Tower like he would be on weekends.

Peter was finally sleeping, well actually he was passed out from exhaustion, but it was still a sort of sleep, technically. Somewhere between Skip moving in and their ever-more-frequent talks “chats,” Peter started to lose sleep. He would stay awake later, slit his wrists longer, and on top of that the surprise beatings from Skip were really taking an affect on Peter. All except the desired affect.

Peter was still bisexual. He didn’t want to be bisexual anymore. He just wanted to be normal, straight. Liking men was wrong, Peter was wrong. May and Skip just wanted what was best for Peter. And this was what was best. Skip was just helping Peter. He was straightening Peter out. This was just want needed to be done.

Skip stumbled into Peter’s room. He saw that Peter was tucked in under his blankets deep in sleep and Skip couldn’t help but climbing into the bed too. He pulled the teen into his body, breathing in how Peter smells, nuzzling his nose behind Peter’s ear.

Peter woke up trapped in Skips arms. He panicked trying to get out, it was just like The Vulture dropping a building on him again. But this time it wasn’t concrete but instead a man. A man who was supposed to be in love with his aunt.

“Skip.” Peter whined trying to wriggle free.

The older man moaned, moving a hand down to feel Peter’s length.

“I didn’t realize that you’d rub off on me. You’re trying to turn me into a homo. Einstein, you’re rejecting your treatment and trying to change me instead, and I don’t tolerate this very much.”

Peter shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut. His whole body shook with nerves, and he thought he was going to vibrate out of his body.

“Skip, I promise I’m taking this seriously. I should be straight, I want to be straight. Just like you Skip, I’m trying really hard to be straight. I promise, I don’t want to be a disappointment to you or May anymore.”

The older man laughed, holding onto Peter tighter. He ground his hips further into the teen, making Peter whine and squirm more trying to break free.

“Einstein,” Skip moaned, “You’re ass, I swear it’s a woman’s. Your such a fairy, Einstein. I could just imagine you as a woman, you’re hair at your shoulders, this great ass and a tight pussy, your tit’s would probably be smaller, barely a handful, but you’d be so cute. Too bad you’re just bent.”

-

Harley sat across from Peter, cheeks blushed, watching Peter carefully. Peter no longer felt that the freckles painted across Harley’s cheeks and nose were cute, and he no longer felt comforted by being in Harley’s presence. Now Peter only felt dread. There was no more warmth or the feeling of being safe. 

Peter wasn’t attracted to Harley. He didn’t want to be with Harley, he was afraid of Harley. What Skip was doing was working. Peter was going straight. He wasn’t going to be bisexual anymore, he was only going to like women now.  Peter wasn’t going to be a freak or a fag or a fairy or a homo or bent. Peter was going to be straight. Skip was fixing him.

“Peter are you okay? You’ve been really spacey recently.” Harley asked keeping his voice soft and cautious. 

Peter smiled. It didn’t feel natural and probably didn’t look all that genuine, but Peter felt like he should be happy. He was happy that he this meant that May and Skip will not be disappointed in him. Maybe then Skip will like him. Now they can be a family

This is going to fix all of his relationships. People are going to like him better if he’s straight. He’ll only like women and be normal. It’ll solve so many problems for him.

“Yeah, Harls, I think I’m actually really good. Like, for real.”

Peter laughed, not one of his soft, bubbly and contagious laughs, the ones he was known for. Instead it was hallow and empty, self deprecating even. Harley’s eyes widened, suddenly more concerned for Peter than he’d been previously.

“Peter...” Harley sighed.

He reached out to grab Peter’s hand, watching Peter flinch back hard. Harley saw the moment Peter recognized what he did and how he tried to shake himself out of it, but he also saw how Peter moved to stay farther away from him.

“I’m good, Harls, really.” Peter nodded again.

“No, you’re not. There’s something seriously wrong. I’m going to figure it out. I’m going to make sure you’re okay.”

-

Three months ago…

Peter and Skip were finally alone. May had been on a stretch of day shifts and Peter’s friends were more persistent on having Peter go out with them during evenings. They were even tracking his food intake. The group was becoming obsessive over Peter now. And Peter was sick of it.

But now Peter was home alone with Skip. He could finally tell the man the good news. It’s been well over a week since Peter had and romantic or sexual feelings for another man. There’s only been fear, with any he looked at. Peter didn’t want to be attracted to men. Skip was curing him. May and Skip will finally accept him again.

As soon as May stepped out of the apartment Peter left his bedroom and sat down on the couch beside Skip. The man smiled at the boy, licking his lips before pinning Peter onto the couch. Skip groped at Peter for a moment, before pressing sloppy kisses onto his neck.

“No, stop, Skip I don’t like this.” Peter fought. “I just wanted to tell you that it worked. I don’t- I’m straight. You cured me. It worked. You and May don’t have to be disappointed in me anymore.”

Skip laughed. Loud and boisterous, pressing his weight down onto Peter. His hands moved up and down the teens frame, removing Peter’s clothes. Peter struggled harder, tears pouring down his face, sobbing out pleas to be let go. He tried fighting it, fighting Skip to keep his clothes on.

“You see Einstein, while I’ve made you straight, you’ve made me a fag. So this is going to have to continue, just a little until I no longer view your twink-ass as jailbait.”

Peter sobbed harder, trying to use his elbows to get away. Instead, Skip just pressed a hand into a patch of fresh cuts, forcing Peter’s vision to white out for a moment, that was just long enough to take off Peter’s underwear off.

“Skip, Skip no. No. I’m not. I swear, I didn’t make you like men. I didn’t do it. I’m straight now. You fixed me, I swear. You need to stop. You don’t want to go there. You don’t want this.”

Peter tried begging. He tried pleading, but he couldn’t stop Skip. It was too late. Skip had a plan and he wasn’t going to stop.

“Real funny that you think you know what I want, Einstein. This is for the best though, I promise, I’m doing this for you.”

-

It was movie night with May. Skip was out meeting up with his old friend was college. So it was just Peter and May. In their living room.

Peter couldn’t sit on the couch. Well, sitting in general wasn’t really working. So Peter just laid down on the ground, and May took the couch.

“Peter, I’m proud of you, you know that?” May finally spoke, halfway through Tangled.

“You are?” Peter didn’t anticipate his voice cracking, but hearing that May was proud of him? It was worth everything.

“Of course, baby. Skip told me that you let him help you, and I’m so proud of you for accepting help. He said that you’re problem was resolved with his help too. I’m so glad you two are getting along.”

Peter heard the words of confirmation that what Skip has been doing is what May also wants. She’s proud of him. She’s happy that Skip fixed him. May is glad that Peter is straight and that Skip turned him. It breaks Peter’s heart to actually hear it from May.

Peter never wanted to do it anyways.

And yet here he is. Having done it for her. He did this for May. To be accepted by May. So that he isn’t a disappointment in her life. And he isn’t happy. He’s not happy with himself, or Skip or May. Peter thought this would make him happy.

Peter wishes he born properly. Born straight. Born not wanting to harm himself. He wishes that the feeling that he needs to die never existed. Peter wishes he could be himself and be loved by his family. It shouldn’t have to be one of the other.

“Thanks.”

He tried not to choke on the acid rising up his throat.

-

Two and a half months ago…

It doesn’t stop. Skip doesn’t stop. His brain doesn’t stop. The fear didn’t replace the attraction like Peter originally thought. It’s just more confusing now.

Peter just wanted this to end.

Skip wasn’t going to end this.

-

Tony and Pepper had invited Peter, May and Skip over for dinner. Tony had made loads of his famous lasagna, and Pepper made a spinach dip appetizer and they ordered cheesecake for dessert.

All the adults seemed to be having a conversation together while Harley and Peter talked among themselves.

“I have an announcement.” Skip smiled at May, bringing the attention to himself.

“I asked May to marry me yesterday and she said yes.”

Peter was sure that this would be what killed him. Skip was his life sentence for whatever Peter did wrong. Skip was going to be his step-uncle, his new guardian.

Tony, Pepper and Harley congratulated the couple, and Tony patted Peter’s shoulder. Wine was brought out Peter couldn’t take it anymore.

“I’m just, I’m going to the bathroom, I’ll be back.” Peter smiled pushing himself out of his spot.

“Hurry back Einstein, we’re gonna be a family, we have to celebrate together.”

Peter was going to be sick.

He nodded and left the room, shutting himself in the bathroom and throwing up.

This isn’t what he wanted. Skip can’t be there for the rest of his life. This was wrong. Everything about this was wrong.

-

One month ago…

Peter was sure Skip was going to kill him. Or use him forever.

Peter didn’t like either option.

-

“I don’t want them to get married.” Peter confessed.

Happy pulled the car over, turning in his seat to see Peter. The kid wasn’t looking very good, he reminded Happy of 2008 era Tony. It wasn’t a very good look on a kid.

“You feel like it’s too soon after Ben? Or is it because of how fast-paced their relationship has been?”

Peter had tried not to think about Ben since Skip moved in. He didn’t want to picture the look of disappointment Ben would give him. Peter didn’t want to think that he is a failure in Ben’s eyes. Ben would believe that Peter brought this onto himself.

‘With great Power Comes Great Responsibility.’

Ben always said that. And yet Peter failed. He gave away his power, and was completely responsible for where he is now. Peter did everything wrong and Ben would know that. He took his uncles advice, his dying words, and ruined them, broke them, tossed them in the trash and set them on fire. Ben would hate this Peter, and Peter knew that like he knew how to breathe.

“Oh, uh, yeah. I just- I don’t think I’m ready for May to be married yet. It just feels like Skip is trying to replace his spot. I don’t want the to get married yet.”

Happy nodded in understanding, trying to give the teen a small smile.

“Pete, no one is ever going to replace Ben. He was your uncle, your guardian, your parent, he raised you. Skip could never live up to that.”

-

Present day…

There’s blood.

Peter is in the bathroom cleaning up his own blood and he doesn’t understand how he got here.

Well, he knows how. He just doesn’t understand it.

And he doesn’t know where to start cleaning it. Peter doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do. This was all horribly wrong.

Peter knew he couldn’t stay here much longer though. Skip had gone back to his own bedroom, after a rough ‘session’ with Peter. And now Peter is alone, and bleeding and he needs to get out.

Peter picks up his phone and makes a call.

“Hey, can you uh, come pick me up, I can’t stay here, I need, uh I need to get out of here.”

“Yeah kid, you got it. I’ll be there in half.”

“Meet me, uh, two blocks up from here actually.”

“You okay, Underoos?”

Peter hung up the phone.

He hoped in the shower hoping the water would get rid of the blood, hoping the soap would wash Skip away. And when that didn’t work Peter put on an oversized sweater and large sweatpants. Peter packed untainted clothing into his book bag and left through his window and down the fire escape, putting his hood up.

This was a mistake.

Leaving was a mistake. Skip was only doing what he thought was- no. No. No. Peter can’t go back.

He won’t live through this. Peter doesn’t want to live through this.

He scratched at his arms as he made it to the spot that Tony was supposed to pick him up.

Peter was going to be sick.

How could he let it get this far? Peter shouldn’t have let this happen. This was all wrong. Why is he relying on Tony to take him away. What if Tony agrees with Skip?

Peter coughed up blood.

New plan.

Go with Tony, make sure his stomach isn’t bleeding, once he’s good, leave. Go fast. Stay away from cameras. Go to Canada. Or Florida. Get out of New York. Go far. Somewhere where May and Skip won’t think he’ll go.

Tony pulls up and Peter hops into the car quickly. Tony doesn’t start driving right away though. Instead he looks at Peter, seeing the fear in the boys eyes, as well the way he is unconsciously scratching his arms.

“What’s happening?”

Peter shakes his head, tears filling his eyes.

“Please, just drive, I can’t be here. Can’t be in the city right now.”

“Is this drugs?” Tony asks as he starts to drive, hoping that Peter won’t leave. “I don’t care if it is, I can get you help.”

“It’s not drugs. It’s probably be easier if it was drugs. Honestly, I wish it was drugs. I can’t go home though, okay? Please don’t tell May.”

“Okay. We can do that for now but I will eventually have to tell her where you are so her and Skip don’t get worried.”

“You can’t” Peter shouted jerking upright and pushing himself further away from Tony. “You can’t. Skip can’t know. He’ll kill me, I swear, he can’t know, I can’t go back.”

Tony nodded, as Peter seemed to fall apart in front of him, hoping that appearing casual while driving will keep Peter talking.

“So we don’t like Skip, alright. Is there a reason why?”

Peter sobbed and Tony was tempted to pull over right then and there, but he knows that scaring Peter would cause him to run, so he needs to keep driving.

“He said he’d help. He did the opposite.”

Tony hummed, bringing them out of the city and towards the compound. Peter was rocking himself slightly, clearly uncomfortable. He started to cough, blood splattering across his arms.

“What the hell, Parker?” Tony said stepping on the gas.

“No Skip, Tony. Promise me, we don’t get him involved even if that means keeping May in the dark. You bring Skip into this then I’m leaving. Okay?”

“Jesus, yeah, okay, promise. We’ll keep him out of this, I got you. No Skip, we don’t want him, I got it Pete.”

Peter nodded, feeling relief wash over him as he was finally in a safe spot. He was out. He was out of that god forsaken apartment. No Skip means he’s safe. Safety means he can finally sleep. So he closed his eyes.

-

Tag List: DM or send and ask if you would like to be added, if you only want to be tagged in pt2 please make that clear  

@peterbeanie @jean-and-diet-coke @dead-inside-pt2 @they-were-cloudsinmycoffee

[maggyme13]

The Alpha next door (3/?)

AN: Here is the third part. I hope it is easy to read, with all the convo in here,

So here it is! I hope you enjoy^^

Warnings: I don´t think so

Wordcount: around 2.5k

TAND-Masterlist

Masterlist

Part 2

The Alpha had left for his house soon after, but not without saving his number in her phone and checking the security of her house.

It was just afternoon the next day when she saw her car being parked in her driveway by the Alpha. A tow-truck was parked in the street.

“All good. Tires are new and I checked the whole engine.”, he rumbled handing over her keys.

“Thank you-”, she smiled, only now realizing she did not even know his name.

“Happy.”, he frowned in a way that showed he had just realized the same thing.

“I wanted to make some cake. Do you want some?”, she asked tensely. Overnight Millie had accepted her fate and planned to make the best out of her situation. First thing was to get to know the Alpha more.

“Either lemon or chocolate.”, she added.

“I take what I get.”, he answered with a smile tucking at his lips. His animal was pleased his chosen Mate wanted to care for him.

“Thank you for bringing my car over. I could have come and got it myself.”

“Had to do a test-ride either way. I will come over after work.”, he shrugged and waved goodbye.

In the end, she decided to make a chocolate cake, one of her favorites, and couldn´t resist eating a piece when it was still warm.

For dinner, she would eat leftovers from the day prior and Millie was just finished when the sound of an approaching motorcycle reached her ears.

“Here. I made a chocolate-cake. This is your half. I hope you like it.”, she smiled upon opening the door, “Do you want to come in?”

“No. Have to go back to the clubhouse. Thanks for the cake.”, and with that, he was gone again with the cake secured in one of his saddle-bags.

-.-.-..-.-.-.-.-.-.-..-.--..-

The night was quiet and as much as she felt refreshed, that much she felt alone. She had awoken alone.

During the day, she caught herself checking if the Alpha had returned to his house. But he would not return for another four days.

And with every passing day, she felt more and more restless.

On the fourth day, she could not think straight. Three times she had to restart the commission she was working on. During lunch, she nearly cut off her finger trying to cook.

Well, takeout it is. There is no way I will risk losing a digit over food.

Deciding to order a large pizza tonno, some salad, and garlic bread she dialed the Pizzeria and readied the table.

Leftovers would be breakfast for the next day.

Nice food´s here!

Taking the money plus tip out of her wallet, she almost danced to the door.

“Thank you, you can kee-”, she beamed, “-p the rest. ...Happy?”

There in front of her stood the Alpha next door with her order on hand and a pointy look on her face.

“You are back… P-please, come in. How have you been? Other than angry I mean.”

“Told you to call if you need anything.”, he rumbled.

“Yes. My apologies. I did not think that included takeout as well.”, the Omega mumbled immediately looking to the floor, “I won´t do it again.”

A deep sigh left his chest.

“Where do you want the food?”

“Living-room please.”, she whispered making room for him to pass, only to follow at once.

His warm scent spread through her nose, lungs, and veins, clearing her foggy head in just minutes. She felt relieved and a contempt  Purr left her chest.

A purr that did not get unnoticed by the Alpha.

“Missed me?”, he chuckled interested and Millie answered even before he had finished his question.

“Yes!”, she blushed, “I mean. It was strange. Nothing felt right. I could not think straight. Had to restart my commission three times today. Couldn´t sleep well either.”

“Mhm, sounds like with-drawl to me.”

“Maybe. Never had one.”, she mused,” But for now I am hungry. Do you want to stay and join me? I ordered enough for three days or two people.”

“Sure.”

“Then take a seat. We can watch TV if you like. Or talk.”

“TV´s fine.”

“Alright. I have some coke, sprite, or beer.”, she offered from the kitchen.

“Beer.”

“Thought as much. I bought a twelve-pack with different types.”, she explained offering two different bottles for him to chose. A stout and a light. He took the stout.

“Good?”

“Yes.”

“Happy to hear. What do you want to watch?”

“Don´t care.”, he shrugged.

“Me neither. Comedy?”

“Alright.”

And so they ate and watched a movie together.

In the end, Millie had leaned against his side and started to drift off into a slumber.

“You want me to leave?”, the Alpha asked when he noticed her state, even though his animal did not want to do so. Neither did he want the Omega to feel uneasy.

But it was already too late for the question, for she was already too deep in the dream world. He moved her, trying to wake her up, but nothing happened.

-..--..--..--..--..--..--..--..--..--..--..--..--..--.

The next time she awoke her pillow was moving and making a sound.

Must have left the TV on.

“Awake?”

That is not the TV

Sitting up with a start, she almost fell of the coach if it wasn´t for the Alpha´s arm around her back.

“I am sorry.”, she squeaked and he laughed.

“For someone who did not want me to let me go yesterday, you sure can´t get away fast enough today.”

His exclamation got her eyes huge in shock and cheeks red in embarrassment.

“I am so sorry. I hope I did not keep you from something important.”

“Just work.”, he grumbled, “Already took care of it.”

 “I will call them and apologize.”, she spoke already looking for her phone.

“Omega, stop.”, he growled, “I said I already took care of it! So leave it!”

His tone and the unknown situation made her freeze in submission, “I am sorry. How long was I asleep?”

“Sixteen hours.”, he mumbled, “Couldn´t wake you up. Decided to let you sleep. Looked like you needed it.”

“I- I could not sleep well the last nights. Guess you being here helped. Thank you.”

“Is fine. Tonight will be long enough.”, he hummed.

“Oh. Today is Friday, right?”

“Yes.”

“Then I think I will head out to the supermarket. Get some chips, popcorn, some soda and maybe chocolate. I am in the mood for a long movie-night.”

Can´t sleep either way probably. 

“What movies?”

“Tolkien-verse or Harry Potter. Don´t know yet. Whatever I am in the mood in tonight for. You can join me later if you want.”

“Can´t we have guests at the clubhouse.”, he almost sighed. 

“Alright. Can I go shopping on my own or do you want to join me?”, Millie asked not wanting to go against his will, again.

“I -”, he started but was interrupted by the ringing of his phone,” -Yeah? Not your concern where I am. Took the day off. Listen Tragger… What do you want?- Fine. Be there in two hours. -then tell that Gemma as well. - I don´t care!”, he growled.

“You have to go?”

“Yes, go shopping. Call if anything happens.”, Happy ordered.

“Sure. I can keep you updated. Send you a message when I am at the market, on my way back, and home.”, Millie stated,” Do you need anything ?”

“M´fine.”, he rumbled.

“I can make you something to eat before you need to go. I can only offer you cereal and toast at the moment though.”, she offered, “And I should have some coffee as well.”

 “Thank you.”, the Alpha nodded in approval and she got up from her seat with a warm feeling, while feeling cold at the same time.

“Toast or cereal?”

“Toast´s fine.”

“Peanut-butter, cheese or sausage? Should be able to get some scrambled eggs with bacon ready as well if you like.”, she called out while leaning half into her refrigerator and squealed when he suddenly answered from right behind her.

“Coffee and toast is fine.”, he stated before laughing,” Sorry.”

“F-fine. I just did not hear you moving.”, she breathed with a hammering heart in her chest, “So coffee and toast it is.”

-..--..--.--..--..--..--..--.--..--.

The man of Meyham was not happy about being forced to help prepare the clubhouse for the visiting charter. That was the prospect's and croweaters' job after all. But seeing that he had stored a few of his weapons and ´toys´ in one of the spare rooms, he cleaned that room without any fuss.

“So, where have you been this morning?”, Tragger asked with an amusing smirk,” Does not sound like you calling in work. What were you doing? Or should I ask: Who were you doing?”

“Shut it Tragger! You are too noisy for your good.”

“I say that shy neighbor of yours. The one you went over and beyond to get the car ready.”, he continued, ducking out of the way in case the other Aloha would throw the knife he held in his hands.

“I said shut it!”, Happy growled instead,” And keep it shut!”

“So I am right. You were with your Omega neighbor. Got a bit possessive over her? Hey, not the first Alpha who does. Though you might let the others know. Heard a few of the others talk about that shy Omega whose tires got sliced.

“Mrpf.”

“Just telling ya. Gotta go though… Gemma asked for my help a while back and I want to piss her off as much as I want to piss off you.”

Happy was still thinking about what his brothers had just told him when his phone informed him about an incoming message.

* I am at the Store*, he read and smiled.

* Good. Be careful*, he answered.

* Sure, will do!*

The next message came nearly one and a half hours later: * On my way home now! Got you some more beer*

* Thank you.*

“Got a good message, brother?”, the Scotsman cheered beside him.

“And what if?”

“Ah, I don´t want to get on yer bad side. Ya just seem different since yer rut.”

“m´fine.”

“If you´re sure. I am fine with that. Just checking in.”

“Mrmh. Bobby in charge of the BBQ again?”, he asked instead of answering the Beta.

“Yes, Gemma prepared the meat with Tara´s help. Are you hungry?”, Chibs laughed.

“Yes.”

“Just ask one of the girls to fix ya a sandwich. They missed ya and were pretty broken when Tig returned claiming you were in rut and did not need their help.”

Happy just shrugged hearing that. He could not care less about their hurt feelings. His animal was only interested in one female now and felt disgusted by the thought of eating something a croweater had prepared.

Their scents had turned foul in his nose since his last rut.

“maybe.”, he nodded and left for the kitchen to see if he could find something in the fridge. He was followed by his brother´s eyes who shook his head in amusement.

He knew why his brother acted that way, he had once acted like that as well.

“Mr. Happy. What can I do for you?”, Chucky asked once the former had entered the kitchen.

“Looking for food. Is there any?”

“Yes. There are some bagels left. I will prepare you some.”

“Thanks.”

Happy had just gotten handed the bagel by Chucky, when the last-most important message- arrived on his phone.

*Back home. Just putting away the groceries. And then trying to choose a movie.* 

*Let me know what you chose.*

*Why? Want to join me later? But sure. I just hope I can stay awake. *

* maybe*, he chuckled when answering her. Maybe once his brothers are dead-ass drunk, he can leave. But that would mean he had to stay sober as well. At least sober enough to ride.

The evening promised to become fun.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.--.-.-.-.-.

In the end, Millie decided to watch the Tolkien Hexalogy with fresh popcorn, soda, and self-made chocolate-covered fruits. 

 She had just finished the second Hobbit-movie and was preparing a huge portion of fries with salad when an uneasy feeling crept up her spine.

That was weird- Why am I feeling like this all of the sudden?

Unbeknownst to her did that have to do with an ego-hurt Alpha spying on her house, deciding if it was safe for him to enter.

No one had dared to deny him before and then that bitch had caused him to be dominated by another alpha. Like he was a weak Beta or even an Omega.

He knew the other Alpha had been around the house a lot, his scent lingered in the air when he had scoped it out earlier, so, smart as he was, he covered his scent with some cheap perfume. 

 He wanted revenge for the beat-up he received, though he knew he would not be able to beat the Alpha, he would be able to beat that Omega. Like that, he would get his revenge on both of them.

The Alpha had even brought a jammer to keep her from calling for aid.

.-.-.-.-.-..-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Feeling the uneasiness to grow with every passing second, Millie walked around her house to see if the windows and doors were closed and locked. They were. But the feeling did not leave.

I should call Happy, right? He said to call him if something feels off. Right?

 Taking her phone, she realized immediately there was no service.

Strange! Still have a cable one in the kitchen though. Hope he still picks up though.

He indeed did after a few seconds that felt like minutes, but he did not say a word when he did.

“Happy? It´s me, Millie. I have this strange feeling and now my cell won´t work. You told me to call when something is up- I think. Sorry if I am interrupting your party”, she explained, nervously playing with the phone-cable.

“Stay in the kitchen and keep the doors locked!”, the Alpha finally answered and at once ended the call.

“Okay.”, she breathed her answer nonetheless and did what he had said.

Standing there, she waited for the rumble of a motorcycle to reach her ears, and only five minutes later the sound of several closed in.

Part 4

AN: so, what do you think? What is going to happen next?

REBLOGS and comments are appreciated:)Thank you very much.

~MaggY

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[utterlyinevitable]

I wanted fluff but I’m in an angst mood now so make an angsty breakup headcanon for Ethan X MC (set in book3) but at the end they get back together because I’m not that much of an angsty teen LOL - your tumblr niece 😌

Ayla 🥺💖💖💖

buckle up this is a long one. 

Ethan x MC (Becca) OHSY/OH3 Breakup

The time after the Valentines Day argument was weird. They made up kind of after MC sent the Thank You text, and didn’t address any of the lingering issues about the future of their relationship and what hospitals she should apply to. Ethan’s response any time they got close was that he’d “write a glowing recommendation” for wherever she chooses to apply. 

They rarely spent time together outside of the hospital, both of them throwing themselves into helping as many patients as possible. Using work to avoid one another and their fears as best as possible. 

Ethan couldn’t take it anymore. 

One day, he made sure their office hours were scheduled together. 

They sat at the diagnostic’s table reassigning files in stark quiet. He broke the silence: “Come over for dinner tonight. I think we need to talk.”

Ever since the blow out, he had been working up the courage to tell her. There wasn’t a point in holding onto it any longer - it’s been almost a year since he recognized his devout feelings for her. But there was never a good enough time. He waited for a sign or any seemingly perfect moment to let it all slip. 

He’s gonna do it tonight. It had to be tonight. The words had been eating away at him even more so knowing she’s giving him the cold shoulder.

Without looking up at his intense gaze she responded, “Yeah. We do.”

Ever since the Amazon stint, Becca promised she would never ever fall for Ethan Ramsey again. She failed miserably. Spectacularly, actually. 

She’s more in love with him now, after everything, than she could ever possibly fathom. 

But she wasn’t going to tell him. 

She vowed she wouldn’t be the one to say it first. And now with everything going on, all their doubts, there really wasn’t a point to setting those three words free. Not anymore.

When she got to Ethan’s condo, he was in the kitchen finishing up plating chicken piccata. It smelled delicious and her stomach rumbled in response. 

But Becca wasn’t planning on having dinner. If they sat and ate, then they’d talk and they couldn’t talk. Not yet. She wasn’t ready for them to implode.

So she kissed him. Hard. Hungrily. Desperately. She needed to have him one last time. Ethan melted right into her, abandoning dinner. 

MC accepted a position in Arizona. 

She leaves in three weeks - moves away five days after Edenbrook shuts its doors. She hasn’t told Ethan yet.

The words come out before she was ready to say them. 

She couldn’t hold them in anymore. The way his blue eyes were so crystal clear and how he was looking at her, cupping her face and keeping her close. Everything in his eyes told her what was coming next. Her stomach did flips and stirred inside. He was going to say it. His swollen lips parted and he was seconds from saying those three words. 

She could not hear it. She didn’t want to hear it.  

So she told him about Arizona, cutting him off. 

All Ethan said was: “I’m happy for you.” 

He didn’t fight. He didn’t say it. He didn’t beg her to stay or volunteer to follow her. All that he said was an assertion that she made the right decision. 

They were devastated.  -

If working together was awkward before, it was worse now. 

Ethan was more on edge than ever. Everyone noticed. There was gossip about their break up, spreading more wildly than the news of their coupling. 

The gang did their best to keep them naturally apart. If one was in the office, the other would be advised to stay in the clinic or take lunch in the cafeteria. 

Both spent more time at work than they should have. Staying there for at least 16 hours every single day. They should have wanted to be at home, less risk of running into the other. But they stayed. A part of them always stayed together. 

That last day, Ethan was more irritable that usual. His own emotions of failing Edenbrook and starting over reigning supreme. He was back to cynical and jaded Dr. Ramsey.  

Then Leland Bloom came in with one last case. 

They both needed it. Neither wanted their final moments of working together to be tainted by their failed romantic endeavor. 

And it turns out Edenbrook needed the case too. 

They got funding from the Blooms rather quickly. And negotiations happened. And people kept their jobs. And Ethan has a bigger role to play than ever. He spent her last few days arms deep in bringing Edenbrook back to life. 

Formal invitations and job offer extensions were sent to all Edenbrook staff. A few members of the gang cancelled their plans to be part of this new adventure and stay in Boston.

All except one. 

The hospital survived but she was still leaving.

There was no heartfelt goodbye between Ethan and MC that final day working together. Just a “good luck” and “keep in touch”. Professionally speaking. The picture of simply colleagues - not even a hug or misconstrued squeeze of the arm. 

She was off to Arizona. 

A younger Becca would have loved Arizona - the Phoenix music scene, the perpetual warmth and sunshine. 

She hated Arizona. It was too hot and there were too many weird bugs making their way into her apartment and everything was just a little too dry. 

With only a year of residency left, MC barely made it six months there. 

She could have gone back to Edenbrook. Back to where she yearned to be. But it was too painful. Too many memories. And he’d still be her boss. 

His flashy new title making Ethan nearly every employee’s direct superior. 

So she reached out to June. 

Mass Kenmore still had room on their team, and at least MC knows their newest surgical resident.

MC didn’t have a place to stay when she got back to Boston. So she stayed with Sienna in their old apartment. Everyone went down with the ship. Everyone but her and Bryce. The new roommate that took over MC’s room was nice and a second year surgical who transferred to Edenbrook.

MC hadn’t even started her new position at MK before Edenbrook was abuzz with the news she was back in town. 

Elijah let it slip to one of the nurses that Becca was staying with them and that none of the doctor’s could work late because they were throwing her a small Welcome Back party. Though she’d already been back for two weeks and survived her first full week at MK. 

Ofc the news made its way to Ethan swiftly. 

The rumor was that the group had rented out the beer garden at Donahue’s to celebrate the moment she got off the plane. 

So Ethan sat at his usual stool waiting for her to walk in. 

She never did. 

So he went to her apartment at midnight and knocked on the door. 

Aurora answered.  “Dr. Ramsey?” she was confused, taking in the dejected man in front of her. There was only one reason he’d be back in this bubble. “She’s not here.”  

The group dinner ended at a sensible time and MC, Jackie and Bryce decided to keep the fun rolling. Doing their favorite late night activity - swimming in the river. 

Except this time they were actually caught. 

They bolted back to the apartment nearly half naked. The whole thing was so liberating and fun and they laughed so hard, Becca nearly doubled over from laughing that Bryce threw her over his shoulder  “Bryce!”  “We gotta keep moving, Becks. We’re too hot to get booked for public indecency.” 

Jackie stops in her tracks when she reaches the building door:  “What the fuck?” 

Causing Bryce to bump into her and almost drop MC. “Jeez, Jackie, what -” Bryce follows her line of vision to see Ethan. “Shit.” 

And MC is just hanging out with the best view of Bryce’s toned ass, the blood rushing to her head because gravity.  “What’s going on? Guys?” “Varma. Lahela.” 

MC freezes and her blood completely drains from her at just hearing his voice. That velvet baritone cadence of her conscience. 

Ethan holds the door open for them, awkwardly signaling for them to enter. 

Jackie takes the door from him. Bryce is frozen, not really sure if he should put her down or not. MC hoped he wouldn’t. 

But he did. He had to use more effort than anticipated to get her off of him, but gradually she slipped down his body and onto her feet. 

Bryce shot her sympathetic eyes, which she repaid with a scowl. Bryce shrugged and turned to follow Jackie inside.  “Hey, man.” he patted Ethan on the shoulder as he passed. 

She folded her arms across herself, trying to cover herself. Overly aware that she was in her underwear in the middle of the night.  “What’re you doing here.”  “I could ask you the same thing.” 

The silence between them was palpable. “You’re back and working at Kenmore.” he stated as indifferently as he could muster through his hurt.  “It’s my first week.”  “Were you going to reach out? We would love to have you back on the team.” 

She didn’t say anything. and that said everything.  

“Why are you here, Ethan?”  “I came to talk.”  “Talk? What could we possibly have to talk about? Edenbrook’s doing better than ever under your supervision, I hated Arizona and now work at MK. There. We’re caught up.” 

He just looked at her with a sinister smile. 

Her ragged breathing, goosebumps and flushed skin and how her eyes darted everywhere but at his face gave him courage. Or maybe it was the three scotches he downed before that moment. 

Four strides. That’s how long it took to get to her. 

He was so close she clutched her balled up clothes tighter to her chest, using it as a shield. Shielding her heart and exposed skin from him. 

Ethan’s voice was deep and breathy: “No, we’re not.” 

She finally looked up at him, lips parted with disbelief. 

His eyes searched her face for any sign of regret or hesitation. For any sign she didn’t want him just as badly. 

All he got was a brush of her trouser against his midsection as her grip on the ball of clothes loosened. 

Their eyes glued. 

One shallow breath... two... three... 

They collided. Neither sure who moved first. 

[thehikingviking]

Boundary Peak & Montgomery Peak from Queen Canyon Trailhead

Memorial Weekend was approaching and I wanted to plan a family trip up a noteworthy peak. Believe it or not, I actually caught Asaka perusing Peakbagger one night. She was looking at state high points. She already has climbed the high points of California, Hawaii, Oregon and Washington (in addition to the high points of Mexico and Japan), so it made perfect sense to climb the high point of Nevada next. I had put off this peak for no good reason, so now I finally had enough motivation to write this one down on my official calendar. Also in the nearby vicinity of Boundary Peak is Montgomery Peak, which I needed to climb as well. I studied the distance, elevation gain and difficulty of the two peaks and came to the conclusion that I would be able to carry the baby to the summit of Boundary Peak, but it would not be prudent to continue to Montgomery Peak with the baby. Since Asaka was mostly interested in the Nevada high point, we agreed that I could leave the baby with her on Boundary Peak, and she could get a head start and carry Leif down the mountain without me. The second major challenge was how to manage the long drive. Our solution was to break it up in segments. We planned to lay over one night at my family cabin in Sonora. Our second night we planned to stay at Benton Hot Springs, stopping along the way for lunch and a short hike. Our third night we planned to camp near the trailhead at Queen Canyon Mine after doing a few short hikes in the greater Benton area. For the sake of completion, I will include a short summary of these small side hikes in my trip report.

I sent out some feelers to some prospects that I guessed would be interested. Brett Marciasini, Scott King and Sean King took the bait. I then extended the invite to some of my non-hiking friends Brian and Zach. I refer to them as my non-hiking friends not because they don’t hike, but because our friendships started from working at Texas Instruments at one point in time. They have been projects that I have been sculpting over time in the effort to develop new hiking partners. This would be a good test for both of them, as I planned a hybrid dirt bag weekend. While I usually take care of most of the specifics with regards to preparation, this time I felt they were ready to take on more responsibility, such as managing their own food, lodging and transportation. This new freedom would allow me to focus more on my wife and baby.

After our first night in the cabin, we drove over Sonora Pass and then down Highway 395 to the Mobile Mart where we had lunch. There was an easy peak called Sagehen Peak referenced in Andy Zdon’s book “Desert Summits” that I wanted to climb. Good dirt roads took us to the Sagehen Saddle, located less than a half mile from the summit. We possibly could have driven up to the summit, but we were all a little restless from riding in the car and we wanted to get some fresh air. After a short walk up the sandy road, we found a rocky outcropping that required a short, easy scramble. It was easy enough for me to climb with the baby in my arms.

Off towards the east were Boundary Peak, Montgomery Peak and Mt Dubois. A late season storm struck the Whites a week prior, and there was a little more snow that I anticipated.

To the north was Mono Lake.

It was a nice little peak, and we rested awhile on top, but there was a slightly higher summit called Crooked Benchmark to our west. We started back down the road so I could get started on the bonus peak.

A twister swirled through the forest on this calm and sunny day.

Zach decided to join me for Crooked Benchmark while the others waited at the car. I didn’t even bother putting on my hiking shoes expecting an easy walk up, but we soon found ourselves bushwhacking through willows. Zach decided early on that this was not fun, and smartly made the decision to turn around. My obsessive compulsiveness had me push forward, but it was rather unpleasant. I kept thinking that the brush would abate, but it remained consistent almost all the way to the top. I found a register at the summit and I had a good view of the Sierra Nevada.

I didn’t want to retrace my steps back down to the car. I walked to the ridge and yelled down at the others to pick me up on the south side of the summit. I don’t think they were able to understand me. I also sent a GPS pin to Brian, but received no response so was unsure if he got it. The southern slopes were much easier. I dealt with some sage brush scratching my shins, but this was a minor inconvenience. I walked out the road, and I eventually found the others parked where I left the pin. We then drove to Benton Hot Springs where I checked in for the evening. We barbecued on Zach’s grill and drank some beer.

I felt a little awkward since Zach and Brian would be left on their own to camp in the desert while Asaka, Leif and I had reservations at the historic inn. I booked the last available room and there was simply no other option. I drove them to a flat tract of BLM land and apologized. Zach responded by stating something along the lines of, “Are you kidding me? This area is incredibly beautiful and we are happy to stay here.”

It was beautiful as dusk descended upon the snow covered Boundary Peak and Montgomery Peak above. I no longer felt guilty. Leif was sleeping when I returned, so Asaka and I snuck out to enjoy the hot springs.

Montgomery Peak was visible from our tub.

The next morning we regrouped at Benton Hot Springs and awaited the arrival of Brett and the Kings. After a round of introductions, we followed Yellow Jacket Road south through the Benton Paiute Reservation. I turned left on a 4WD road I spotted from satellite view and the topo map. We planned to hike from here, but I decided to see how far I could drive. Scott was a little less zealous about driving up the road than I was, so he and Sean piled into Brett’s truck and they followed me. With a great deal of patience, we made it almost the whole way up the peak. We parked at a mine in between Blind Spring Hill and Diane Peak.

It took us all but five minutes to reach the to of Blind Spring Hill.

To the southwest was the Sierra Nevada.

To the west was Glass Mountain Ridge.

To the east were Montgomery Peak and Mt Dubois.

To the southeast was White Mountain.

While the peak was “just okay”, the summit register contents were a treat. Scraps went back to 1966.

The refurbished book was a standard Gordon Macleod and Barbara Lilley register, which is almost a standard for all the arcane desert peaks throughout the southwest.

One of the early signatures was from Andy Zdon, the author of “Desert Summits”. If was solely because of his book that I decided to climb this peak in the first place. 

In addition to Blind Spring Hill, there are six other named summits in close proximity along this ridge. These little peaklets were most likely named because of mining claims, and are hardly peaks at all. Since we had a full day ahead of us, we decided to only climb Diana Peak as a bonus peak, as this was less than a quarter mile from our car. 

The little bump was not much of a peak, but allowed us to pad the stats. 

We walked back down to the car and drove back to Benton. We were ahead of schedule so we decided to visit Trafton Mountain and Antelope Mountain just north of town. I led the way with my Jeep, but unknowingly made a big navigational error. There is a very good 2WD road that follows a powerline that crosses over the saddle between Trafton Mountain and Antelope mountain, but I somehow missed it. Instead, I led the group up a rarely driven 4WD road. It was incredibly rough and sketchy in parts. At one point we had to get out of our vehicles to move a fallen tree.

I was relieved to finally reach the better powerline road, but I was a little ashamed. We wasted a lot of time and mental energy dealing with that section of road. Asaka and Leif decided to skip Trafton Mountain and instead ate some lunch. We left them in the shade and started hiking towards the peak.

We hiked southwest up sandy and rocky slopes. It was a little too warm for my liking. Brian ran into a little issue when he kicked a cactus with his finger shoes. It took us about an hour to reach the summit.

We were again blessed with another Zdon signature in the register.

One the way down we found the remains of a deer.

Brett had a go at it, ripping the head clean from the still attached leg.

Brian was a little surprised to see us admire the carcass with such enthusiasm. I told him that dismantling dead animals is what white people do for fun.

We found sandy slopes on the way down. In the end it was a 2.6 mile outing.

Once reunited with Asaka and Leif, we got back in the car and followed a spur road all the way to the summit of Antelope Mountain. There were several structures on the summit. To the west was the salt flat called Antelope Lake.

To the south was Trafton Mountain.

I was mostly satisfied after 3 summits from Andy Zdon’s book. We drove back to the freeway following the good road this time. The difference was night and day. After filling up gas in Benton, we drove into Nevada, then took a right on Queen Mine Road. We spotted a Mustang in the canyon below Mustang Peak.

We stopped at Queen Mine where we decided to spend the night. We considered camping at the Queen Mine Trailhead, but settled on this location because it offered wind protection. Also, it was a really cool spot.

We spent the next few hours grilling Brett’s self-killed Bison, drinking beer and listening to music by the campfire. Sean and I thought about heading up Mustang Mountain, but in the end I decided against it, feeling a little worn out from earlier.

The next morning we drove the remaining mile up the road to the Queen Mine Trailhead. My Jeep and Scott’s 4Runner had no problems with the road.

I told everyone not to wait for me, since I would be slow carrying the baby. Asaka picked up Leif and then left me! That message wasn’t meant for them.

I organized some last minute things then started off at 6:45am.

The trailhead is at 9,800 feet, which is pretty high. I spent the first mile or so focusing on breathing. Asaka thankfully waited for me and we hiked in unison.

It felt like a Martian landscape with the moon setting above the desolate terrain.

There was a really good trail climbing up the ridge. A lone deer watched me as I slowly lugged my payload uphill.

Even with my extra weight, I passed Brian early on. I hoped that this hike wasn’t too much for him. After a mile, Boundary Peak came into view.

T'was a lovely family day.

The trail stayed flat for 1.7 miles until Trail Canyon Saddle. Brett, Zach and the Kings were already way ahead of us and out of sight.

To my pleasant surprised, we ran into a herd of mustangs.

I think one of them was pregnant. There were several foals among the herd.

Brian paused for a while to photograph the ungulates.

We stopped for Leif’s breakfast along this flat portion. Maintaining his schedule is very important, even if it means falling further behind the group. He ate his blueberry oatmeal and banana without a care in the world. I was concerned since Brian hadn’t caught up to us by the time Leif finished his breakfast, but my priority was with my family. We continued all the way to Trail Canyon Saddle.

The fun part was now over for me. From here on out, I had to put in the work. The route continued steeply from here on out, but this was made easier since the trail remained underfoot. I finally spotted Brian down below and by all indications he was continuing. Across the saddle was Trail Canyon Saddle Peak. I hoped to tag this bonus peak on my return.

The false summit of Hosebag Peak was a little deceptive. It would have been worse if I didn’t expect. It was a little demoralizing to know that I still had to climb 1,000 feet from here, but it was still early and I was making good time.

Love.

The trail stays atop the ridge. The snow caused no impediment.

The ridgeline became more serrated and the trail eventually petered out. There are class 2 ways up from here, but if one is not paying attention, they can easily find themselves on class 3. 

I could spot Sean and Zach on the summit from below.

Asaka chose a lower route while I stayed closer to the top of the ridge. I felt like we were going slow, but then I spotted Brett and Scott not so far ahead of us.

A light trail reemerged higher up the mountain. I worried that Sean and Zach were waiting too long for me on top. I worried that Brian wouldn’t make the summit.

I had to cross some soft snow as I neared the top, but this was not a challenge. Montgomery Peak finally came into view beyond.

We reached the summit at 10:45am, four hours after we started out.

I unloaded the baby, inadvertently waking him in the process. Hey bud, welcome to the high point of Nevada.

Sean had been waiting on the summit for over an hour. He beat Zach by 20 minutes. Brett and Scott were only about 10 minutes ahead of Asaka and me. Brian was still nowhere to be found. I texted Brian and told him that he had a 1pm turn around time, and I told Scott to tell Brian to turn around if he had not made the summit by that time. I relieved myself of baby carrying duties and let Asaka take care of the rest. Brett, Sean, Zach and I turned our focus to Montgomery Peak. We dropped off the mountain and hiked towards the saddle where we crossed the California and Nevada border.

We had read a diverse set of claims from various trip reports and weren’t quite sure what to expect. In the end, the traverse was mostly class 2 with some easy class 3 and a few sections of loose rock.

We hiked mostly on top of the ridge, but in the places where the ridge became sharp, we stayed underneath the left side. The route finding was very easy and well placed cairns but and end to any doubts.

A lone climber passed us on the final stretch. Once on the summit we introduced ourselves and I learned that he went to my same climbing gym in San Jose. To the north were Mt Dubois and White Mountain.

To the southwest were Benton Point and the Sierra Nevada.

Way below us to the northwest were the diminutive Trafton Mountain and Antelope Mountain. Beyond that were the high peaks of Yosemite and a sliver of Mono Lake.

Way off to the north were Mt Grant and Walker Lake.

To the northeast were the Volcanic Hills and desert wasteland.

To the east ran Middle Creek Canyon.

The conditions couldn’t have been better. On our return, we decided to pick a route staying along the top of the ridge. Brett, who was a little nervous of the ridge traverse at first, mastered this knife edge section and proved to all that he is a master scrambler.

-Middle Creek

Our remaining group was gone by the time we reached Boundary Peak.

We took only a short break here before descending back down. Brett and I stopped to bag Hosebag Peak, which stood just a few minutes off the trail. Sean already did this on the way up, and he had his eyes set on the bonus peak Mustang Mountain on the other side of Queen Canyon Saddle. Zach didn’t seem to care about any more bonus peaks and simply continued down.

From Hosebag Peak, we followed the trail down to Trail Canyon Saddle.

Brett and I then marched up barren slopes to the summit of our last bonus peak for the day.

The views from the summit were sublime.

From the summit, we continued down the ridgeline until we naturally intersected the trail.

I left Brett somewhere along this off trail section and began a powerwalk once I reached the trail. 

I soon caught up to Brain. I was thrilled to learn that he made the summit before his turn around time. He seemed to be having a great day.

I was surprised to catch Zach next. He was seriously feeling the altitude. I bade him farewell and continued ahead. Asaka and Scott just barely beat me back to the car. I was happy to see my wife and baby happy and in one piece. Apparently Leif spotted a herd of deer and pointed them out to the previously unaware Asaka and Scott.

Brian finished the hike at the same time that Sean came back from Mustang Peak, so timing was perfect. After some hydrating, we all hopped back in the cars and drove back out to Highway 6.

Once on pavement, we said goodbye to the Kings who had High Sierra plans later in the week. The rest drove back to Lee Vining for dinner. Asaka was tired and the baby was fussy, but things got better once we all got some dinner inside of our bellies.

After dinner, we found a dirtbag spot just outside of Bridgeport where we spent the night. We planned to climb South Sister in the Sweetwaters the following day before driving back home to the Bay Area.

[julessworldd]

Punk Duff x reader

 Summary: Duff brings his long term girlfriend on tour with Guns and during an interview, Duff gets asked what he would do if some model came in his dressing room. The reader gives me the cold shoulder for a bit.

Word Count: 1358

Duff said the tour would be something that I’m not used to, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt. I partied with him and the boys way before they got on tour with Motley Crue, ran from the cops with Axl and Slash, got into a bar fight along with Duff when a biker gave another biker a drink that was a ‘Blowjob’. Like I said we’ve had crazy times together, what's gonna be different besides that they had to work. 

This was a tour with Motley Crue, bad boys of Hollywood, famous ‘Terror Twins’ running around. The boys had been nice to me and bought me a couple of drinks at a bar. Nikki had grown a liking to me and he looked out for me when Duff was on stage or had an interview.  Duff and Steven were currently doing an interview for MTV, I sat on the old, lumpy couch in a back room. The door opened and I smirked, “Hey Baby” “Uh, baby that’s different. Hey yourself” Izzy said shutting the door. “Oh it's you, forgot you had an interview” I sighed, throwing my head back on the couch.

“Sorry for not being prince charming, princess” Izzy pushed my knee playfully.  “Do you know what’s going on after their interview? I’m starving, Iz” I asked. “Not sure, Y/n” Izzy said, lighting a cigarette.  I nodded and moved my foot away from Izzy’s space.  “What would you do if she did come into your dressing room, thou?” Steven asked as the door opened. “I don’t know, but I wouldn’t do what that interview was suggesting to do. How many pictures of Y/n and I do they need that I’m not single?” Duff rolled his eyes. I raised my head from the couch and stared at him. Izzy must have sensed it, “You guys wanna get something to eat, Y/n said she was hungry earlier” Izzy asked standing up. “Yeah, I could eat,” Steven said as Izzy walked towards the door. Duff was quiet and looked down at his cowboy boots. Izzy held the door for me as Steven and him raced to the car, Duff trailed behind.  “Hey, can we talk? I hate when you’re mad at me” 

“Duff, I’m not. Nor am I upset, let's go get lunch, okay?” I sighed, turning on my heel, walking to the car. “Babe” Duff groaned. We stopped at diner, that looked decent or could be where teeangers stop at before being killed. An older waitress sat us down in a booth towards the back, per Izzy’s request. I was gonna sit with Izzy, but Popcorn had already plopped down next to him. Great a weird lunch with Duff. Duff stood letting me in and sat down as a young, pretty, blond haired girl with a preppy smile waitress started asking what we wanted to drink. Steven was shaking the table from bouncing his knee from his energy that built up. Normally, it would be fine, but I laid my head down on the table. “Hey kid, you okay?” Izzy nudged my calf. “Fine, Iz” I sighed wrapping my arms in front of my face. “She okay?”, The waitress asked as she sat our drinks down. Duff looked over and finally noticed me, “Hey Y/n, you good?” I stayed silent and hid in my arms. “You guys ready to order?” The boys had ordered and I told her I wasn’t hungry, which was a lie but after, hearing what Steven asked Duff just ruined my appetite. Believe me, I would munch down on a bacon burger with extra fries and would still get some Duff’s.  Steven went to the bathroom and Izzy went out for a smoke, leaving Duff and I alone. 

 “What’s wrong? You were hungry before the interview, Baby” Duff asked, turning to me. I stared at the booth in front us, watching our waitress clean a table.  Trying not to scream at Duff in public, I dug my nails in my hand, the universe wasn’t strong enough to hold my tongue.  “What the fuck was Steven talking about a chick coming into your dressing room before at show? Are you cheating on me?” I said turning to face Duff. Duff was shocked and just stared at me, “No, I would never cheat on you. Interviewer mentioned that a model was a fan of Guns and apparently she has a thing for me. And if she did come into my dressing room with you in the room or not, I would tell her to get lost. I only have eyes for you, always have. I was wanting to tell you before we got here, but you stormed off and attached to Izzy” Duff said while holding my hand. I grabbed him by his chin to look in his eyes, to see if he was lying. No lies in his green orbs, I smiled, “I’m sorry for thinking you would cheat on me, Duff. I know you would never, but I got worried that you would get tired of me and would get a groupie or something.” I said letting my hand go, but he laid it on his cheek as he nodded. Duff leaned in and dipped to my lips, it got pretty heated, forgetting we’re in public. Izzy cleared his throat as our waitress stood at the table with their food, watching us make out. I pushed Duff off and turned back around in the booth. Duff just smirked at me as she walked away, clearly blushing. “It’s not funny, McKagan” I whined. “Yeah, it was hot,” Steven said as he ate his burger, he spit it out as Duff kicked his calf. I shook my head knowing his little crush on. Slash had too many and confessed that Steven thought I was pretty and got sad when he realized Duff and I were together.

The boys were getting ready for their show, Duff was putting on a Misfits tank top. “Do you ever stay mad at him?” Izzy asked, making me jump in fear. “Have a few times, Stradlin’”, I said looking at Duff. Rest of the boys were outside waiting on Axl and Duff, “Hey, I’m sorry for being a pain in the ass earlier. Just that I haven’t got used to the whole you being famous and women finding you attractive.” I said as Duff pulled his last cowboy boot on. “It's okay, I drug you down here from home when you barely graduated from school. I’ve asked you to do a lot of stuff for me, and put you through a lot. I should have let you decide if you wanted to move to LA or if you wanted to go to college. It bothers me that I didn’t ask you what you wanted” Duff wrapped his arms around my waist. “There was nothing in Seattle for me anymore, hell half of our friends were on heroin and couldn’t tell what day it was. I’ve not regretted one time, running away with you. It makes me happy seeing what you love and wanted to do since you were 14. Sure, it gets hard not having you home, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I love you, Punk” I said, looking up at him. Duff grinned, “I love you too, baby” I stood up and kissed him as Axl opened the door. “Hey Doll, I need your boyfriend for a bit. Then you can have him again and in a week have a pregnancy scare” I rolled my eyes, “Fine Ax, you can have him, I guess”

 Duff grinned as he finished his beer. “You’re still on your birth control, right?” “Yes, babe I am” I snickered. “Good good.. Be back later” Duff kissed me before running to the guys. “Crazy fucker” I smiled watching him do what he loves in life. 

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

Seeing Double (Part 2)

Summary: After the Winchesters show up at Jensen’s apartment, they discover getting the boys home may not be possible...

Part 1

Pairing: Alpha!Dean x Alpha!Jensen (platonic, brotherly relationship)

Word Count: 6,200ish

Warnings: language

________

“Ow,” said Dean, Danneel pulling back into a corner of the kitchen, hiding behind a cup of coffee and Jensen. “Why’d she pinch me?”

“I was really hoping I was going crazy,” she said, resting her head against Jensen’s back with a sigh. “Maybe there’s a gas leak…”

“They’re real,” said Jensen, running his hands over his face, shaking his head at Sam. “At least Sam’s babysitting the kids so we can sort this out.”

“Uh huh,” she said, setting her coffee down and going back to Dean, leaning into his face.

“Hey, you look like that dick angel that screwed us over. Sister Jo,” frowned Dean, squinting at her. 

“Excuse me?” she said with a scoff, Jensen grabbing her shoulders and pulling her back.

“She acts too. If you see somebody that looks like Ruby, don’t go stabbing her either,” said Jensen, sighing loudly. “You guys are great and everything but can you like...not be here?”

“Ah. So when you come to our universe you expect a little hospitality but when we get here-“

“Point made,” said Jensen, glancing around the apartment. “What do we do with them?”

“Well I’m supposed to fly home with the kids today,” said Danneel. “You have to be at work in like an hour.”

“Hey, Sammy and I are big boys. We don’t need a babysitter,” said Dean. 

“Oh, yes you do,” said Jensen, grabbing Dean’s jacket collar, getting a nasty glare in return. “You guys are...you’re different, remember?”

“Oh. You’re worried-“

“There is no ‘Dean’s whiny juice’ here,” said Jensen. “I know everything now so-“

“Could someone explain what you’re talking about?” asked Danneel.

“In a minute,” said Dean, shifting in his seat. “I gotta use your bathroom.”

“Down the hall,” said Jensen. Dean got up from his seat, Sam wandering over. “Thanks for taking the brunt of the three musketeers this morning.”

“They’re cute. I could kind of hear what you were talking about and I should tell you-“

“What happened?” said Dean, storming out of the bathroom. “What...I can’t...there’s not...I am an Alpha!”

“Different universe,” said Sam with a shrug. “I’m not happy either but I sort of like it.”

“Again, someone clue me in please.”

“Okay,” said Danneel, nodding her head after a moment. “Okay. I’m not okay but okay.” 

“Can they just hide in the apartment until we figure something out?” asked Jensen.

“Fine,” she said. “Don’t break anything and I swear if you two bring any freaky stuff in here-“

“Yes mam,” said Sam.

“If you two are gonna be here, at least help De out with packing up the kids for their flight,” said Jensen. “I’m gonna be late.”

“Going to work, actor boy?” teased Dean. “We’ll hold down the fort for you.”

“Just do what she tells you and you’ll be fine.”

“Rough morning?” said Jared, patting Jensen’s back in the lunch line. “You look like you’re having a day.”

“That’s a word for it,” grumbled Jensen, Jared chuckling. “What?”

“We should go out tonight for dinner. Neither one of us have early call times tomorrow,” said Jared.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” said Jensen.

“Fine. I’ll come over and we’ll order something,” said Jared.

“I’d rather...fuck. If De knows then Gen is gonna know soon and you might as well hear it from me,” said Jensen.

“Hear what?” asked Jared.

“Well…”

“No way,” said Jared, poking Sam in the chest that night.

“Why’s he poking me?” asked Sam, Jared doing it again.

“Because he’s excited. Jared,” said Jensen, Jared pulling his hand back. “I don’t know what to do with these guys.”

“Just let us head on over to the bunker, we do the spell and then we’re back where we belong,” said Dean.

“The bunker doesn’t exist, just like magic doesn’t exist,” said Jensen. Dean scoffed, waving him off. “Well you’re not an Alpha here so it’s not a far stretch to say magic doesn't either.”

“I am an Alpha, whether I got the equipment or not,” said Dean, glaring at Jensen.

“Well this is my house, Alpha,” said Jensen, Dean taking a big whiff of the air. “And?”

“You don’t smell like anything,” said Dean, putting his hand on his head as he walked away. “Sammy-”

“Hey, at least we won’t get ruts here,” said Sam.

“I want to go home,” said Dean, looking around. “Our home. You understand that, Jenny.”

“I’m gonna kick your ass you call me Jenny again, Deanie,” said Jensen with a smile. 

“Maybe we let them try to get back and do their spell. It doesn’t hurt to try,” said Jared. Jensen shrugged, Sam seeming to have an easier time with this than his brother. “Hey, uh, why don’t we order some pizzas and have some beers? Jens and I don’t have work until 11.”

“Whatever,” said Dean, slumping over to a corner of Jensen’s couch, Sam giving them both a smile and look that said he was sorry.

“Hey dude,” said Jensen after Jared had gone home and Sam was passed out in the guest room, snoring away. Dean hummed from the couch, mindlessly watching something on TV. “You doing okay?”

“No,” said Dean quietly. “You know how fucked up I am, Jensen. Like, possibly even better than Sam. The Alpha thing, I know it’s not a big deal or it shouldn’t be but it feels like I lost a part of me. At least as an Alpha, I had a pack and was pack leader to Sam and that meant something, you know? I was important to him.”

“You’re still important, Dean,” said Jensen, taking a seat nearby. “Your brother loves you. Trust me. Jared ain’t even related to me and he loves me. He’s my brother.”

“Yeah but you’re normal. You can make friends and have a wife and kids. If we’re stuck here, I’m sure Sammy will find a sweet girl and it’ll all be fine. I’m...I’m screwed up. I wouldn’t put that on anyone but at least with hunting, I was doing some good. Now I got nothing,” said Dean.

“You could get a job that helps people,” said Jensen, Dean rolling his eyes. “Dude, if you’re stuck, I got your back. The whole family does.”

“Okay, enough with the nice guy schtick, alright?” he said. 

“I had to go through crap and you guys took care of me. Now it’s my turn,” said Jensen. “And I am nice, asshole.”

“You are the weirdest friend I’ve ever had,” said Dean.

“I certainly hope so as your fucking twin from another universe I win the weirdest fucking friend award,” said Jensen. Dean chuckled, rubbing his hand against his head. “I thought I talked to you about this self-deprecating stuff back in your universe.”

“You did. I just don’t listen well,” said Dean with a shrug.

“You got that right. You ate my ice cream. I was looking forward to eating that like all freaking day,” said Jensen.

“Yeah but dude, it was triple fudge,” said Dean. “I couldn’t resist.”

“Well lucky for you, I got a secret stash in the-”

“Box of frozen veggies? Yeah, I use that trick on Sam at home. Sorry bud,” said Dean, Jensen staring at him slack jawed.

“I hate you and respect you at the same time,” said Jensen.

“Just being a good house guest,” said Dean with a smirk. “You probably need some shut eye, you look pretty wrecked.”

“Yeah, long day,” said Jensen, running his hands over his face. “Long few days. I need to head home this weekend, just relax.”

“Kansas?” asked Dean.

“Texas,” he said.

“Eh, good enough. At least you didn’t say LA,” said Dean. 

“Goodnight, asshole,” said Jensen, ruffling Dean’s head as he walked past.

“You too, Jensen.”

Friday Afternoon

Jensen only had a half day at work, standing in his apartment with his bag to fly home for the weekend around lunchtime. Jared got a flight out the night before and he and Sam had become best buds. Sam was easily adjusting to the situation far better than Dean. Sam didn’t seem to care so much about no longer being an Alpha and had already taken to cleaning Jensen’s apartment more than once, cooking dinner for him when he got home, trying to be helpful like Jensen had when he was at their place.

Jensen could see Dean wasn’t doing well though, Sam exchanging glances with Jensen every so often, not quite sure what to do about it. All he did was sit in Jensen’s apartment, watch TV and drink Jensen’s alcohol. 

“Hey uh, guys?” said Jensen, both brothers spinning around on the couch. “I’m going to head out for the weekend. Call if you need anything, okay?”

“We’re not children, Jenny,” said Dean, spinning back around.

“I’m still older than you, Deanie,” said Jensen, lightly smacking Dean’s arm as he walked over. “You guys got any plans?”

“Besides the fact we’re trapped in this universe forever? No, no plans,” said Dean.

“Sam, you do that thing I asked you to do?” asked Jensen. Sam smiled and nodded. “Good. Get your asses up then. We’re going to Texas.”

“What?” said Dean.

“Jensen thought it’d be a good idea if I made up some fake ID’s for us, just in case. Shockingly easy to hack into systems in this universe,” said Sam.

“I don’t need to know that,” said Jensen as he shut his eyes, flashing them open. “Well, give Dean his new passport and license. I got extra plane tickets. Whatever you guys need, we’ll grab in Texas.”

“Here,” said Sam, fishing a new wallet and a little book out of his pocket, handing it to Dean.

“Dean Ackles. Seriously?” said Dean.

“I’m sorry. I have a potentially recognizable face, so does Jared. You guys have to be fake twins to us here,” said Jensen.

“Sammy and I can’t even be brothers?” said Dean, scrunching up his face. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

“I think I’m getting you out of this apartment, back in a country you know, a part of the country you know,” said Dean. 

“Oh? And what do we say when you guys both suddenly have identical twins,” said Dean.

“That you’re very private people. Hey, I got other siblings, so does Jare. We keep stuff outside of wives and kids pretty tight vested. It’s easy enough to pull off,” said Jensen. “Once you get in the states...it’ll be good for you. I swear.”

“At least I don’t have to be Sam Padaleski,” mumbled Dean.

“Padalacki,” said Sam.

“Pada...whatever,” said Jensen, rolling his eyes. “Just keep your mouth shut through security and for the love of god, do not do anything that gets us in trouble. Only Jared and I know about this right now. I don’t need my parents finding out they had another ‘son’ from airport security.”

Jensen saw the guys relax a bit once they were in Texas. It was somewhat familiar, both of them amazed at where Jensen lived, Jensen gripping the steering wheel tight every time one made a comment about “rich” people. Jensen arguably owned enough flannel to be a Winchester himself.

“Hi daddy,” said JJ when Jensen got out of his truck, Jensen scooping her up in a hug.

“Hi honey,” he said, giving her a kiss on the cheek. “What are you doing outside all by yourself?”

“Mommy said I could,” said JJ, pointing through the window to the kitchen, Danneel giving Jensen a smile. “Hi Uncle Sam and Dean!”

“Hey, kiddo,” said Sam, JJ turning her attention to Dean.

“Hi, JJ,” said Dean softly.

“You guys gonna stay for dinner?” she asked.

“Yup. They’re going to stay with us for a while,” said Jensen, grabbing his bag from the trunk. “Come on boys. De’s friday night meals are always the best.”

“This is amazing,” said Dean, Danneel chuckling as he worked on his third plate of food, Jensen taking the opportunity to spend some playtime with the kids.

When he returned, the boys were washing up the dishes, Danneel sitting at the counter with a smile.

“I like them. I think we should keep them,” said Danneel teasingly.

“I think we have to,” mumbled Jensen, Danneel staring up at him. He sighed and hopped up on the counter, holding her hand as the guys finished loading up the dishwasher. “I think...I think it’s time we got realistic about the chances of you guys going back to your own universe.”

“I told you he just brought us down here to ditch us,” said Dean.

“I brought you down here so you don’t sit in that apartment all day. This is our home and it’s private. Go outside, take a swim, get your head on straight. You both have to accept that these are your lives now. It’s all our lives,” said Jensen.

“What do you mean?” said Sam, taking a seat at the other counter. 

“I mean if I was a normal guy, Jared was a normal guy, we could let you slip away just fine. Start over however you want. We don’t get that option. In public, you have to be an Ackles and you have to be a Padalecki. You have to be our brothers,” said Jensen.

“How the hell are we going to pull that off?” scoffed Dean.

“We’d have to get the family on board with it,” said Danneel. “Although your dad would probably be the only really hard sell if you think about it.”

“No! We’re not-”

“Dean,” said Jensen. “Listen. We-”

“Oh shit,” said Danneel when the garage door opened. “I forgot.”

“Forgot what?” said Jensen, wide eyed when he saw his dad round the corner and pause, blinking at the scene in front of him. “You forgot my dad was stopping over!”

“He was driving up from Houston after a small gig there earlier today. I told him he could crash here tonight, surprise you,” she said, running her hands over her face.

“Well. I am surprised,” said Jensen’s dad.

“Uh,” said Jensen, quickly hopping off the counter. “I uh…”

His father walked past him and stepped over to Dean, holding up a finger and poking Dean in the chest. He did the same to Sam, staring back at Dean. 

“You’re the Winchesters,” said Jensen’s dad.

“Exactly!” said Jensen, his dad holding up a hand.

“I ain’t convinced I haven’t gone insane so give me a second, kiddo,” he said. He tilted Dean’s chin up, Dean glancing at Danneel who just shrugged, Dean swallowing when Jensen’s father flicked him in the side of the head.

“Ow,” said Dean, rubbing his temple.

“Alright. I’m Alan,” he said to Sam and Dean, turning his attention to Jensen. “What is happening?”

“Honestly? It’s a long story,” he said.

“Well start talking before I call your mother to have us all committed.”

“Well…” said Dean, sharing the bottle of bourbon Jensen had gotten out long ago with him. “Your dad seems really nice.”

“Give me,” said Alan, stealing the bottle away and whacking both Dean and Jensen on the back of the head.

“Dad,” whined Jensen, pouting when his father scowled.

“This is weird enough and we don’t need you two drunk,” he said. “Now sit back down.”

“Forget what I said,” mumbled Dean.

“I heard that,” said Alan.

“Well I ain’t your kid,” said Dean.

“Do I need to have this conversation with you too?” said Alan, staring at Sam. He shook his head, Danneel quickly skirting out of there with Sam to go hide in the living room. “Listen up. My kid is the one helping you. He could leave you and your brother to figure out this world on your own but guess what? He’s not. He’s choosing the hard thing because it’s what’ll probably help you the most. But if you don’t want it, there’s the door.”

“Dad, there isn’t really an alternative,” said Jensen. “Not unless they live in a shack the rest of their lives.”

“Fine with me,” he said.

“Dad,” said Jensen.

“Why should we do all this, drag the whole family, drag Jared’s whole family, through a big lie for someone who’s going to be ungrateful about it?” he said.

“Because it’s Dean and he’s not exactly open about this stuff,” said Jensen. “I have been playing him on TV for years. I have a good idea of how his head works.”

“I ain’t convinced. Get out,” said Alan.

“Dean, stay,” said Jensen, lifting his chin. “This is my house.”

“I’m not going to lie about having another son if he doesn't want it,” he said.

“I was stuck there in their world, dad. Trapped. Sam and Dean helped me,” said Jensen. “And what the hell is this all of a sudden? We help people when we can, that’s how you raised us. We’re good people and you’re acting like a dick.”

“You want the whole family to lie? For him?” asked his dad.

“Yes,” said Jensen. “For both of them.”

“Why?” said Alan.

“Because no one ever did a thing for them. The show was real for them, their actual lives. They deserve another shot, a shot at normal where they don’t have to hide,” said Jensen. “Please.”

“Good boy,” he said softly. Jensen scrunched up his face, tilting his head and glancing at Dean. “Hey, I already knew I was going to do it. I wanted to know why you wanted to.”

“Dickhead,” mumbled Jensen, his dad ruffling his hair.

“Whine like that and I’ll let Dean be the older twin,” said Alan with a chuckle.

“No!” said Jensen. “I’m older!”

“Do I get a say in this? Like at all?” said Dean. Alan shrugged.

“Technically you are younger,” he said.

“In this world, jerkface,” said Dean. Alan nodded and curled his finger.

“Let’s go have a chat outside,” he said. Dean huffed but followed after him, Jensen sighing when he found Danneel and Sam hanging out in the living room. 

“I’m sorry about Dean,” said Sam, giving Jensen a smile. “He really does appreciate everything. I think the Alpha thing is really messing with him. He was head of the pack after our dad died and being head Alpha is a big deal in our world. I mean, take Dean with all his normal crap and add this on top of it.” 

“I know,” said Jensen, plopping down next to Danneel, resting his head on her shoulder. 

“Are only boys Alphas?” she asked, Jensen smiling up at her. Sam chuckled a little and shook his head.

“No. Pretty sure if she wasn’t an Alpha, she’d be the feistiest Omega I ever met though,” said Dean, rounding the corner with Jensen’s dad. “So yeah, chicks can totally be Alphas. A bit rarer though.”

“Well, I’m heading to bed kids. I’ll see you all in the morning, figure out how the hell to tell your mother we have another kid,” said Jensen’s dad, rubbing the back of his neck. “Goodnight.”

“Night,” said Danneel, giving Dean a smile. “So…”

“Can I talk to Sammy alone?” asked Dean.

“Yeah. We uh...we only got the one guest room but there’s plenty of couches around,” said Jensen, Dean smiling.

“Dude, it’s okay,” he said. “Uh, mind showing us? This’ll probably be a while. We got a lot to talk through. Brother to brother.”

Jensen nodded and played good host, showing them the bedroom and bathroom they could use, finding some extra sheets and pillows for Dean and setting them down in the room.

“De and I are just off the front door, other side of the house,” said Jensen, turning to leave.

“Hey, twin,” said Dean, Jensen glancing over his shoulder. “Call up Jared. Us four got a lot to talk about.”

“Honey?” asked Danneel, Jensen crawling into bed in the middle of the night. “What’s up with the boys?”

“We’re going to do it. Fake us both having twin brothers,” said Jensen. “I can’t believe this is our life now.”

“Hey, you always wanted the Winchesters to have a family,” she said.

“I didn’t think it’d literally be our family, De,” said Jensen, throwing an arm over her. “Why’d you ask about the Alpha stuff earlier?”

“Dean’s having a hard time, I want to help him if I can,” she said.

“Me too, sweetheart.”

Two Weeks Later

“Yo,” said Jensen, hopping out of his car on the way home from the airport, making a quick pit stop at the brewery. Dean gave him a nod, setting a sack of hops down. “De got you put to work good this week I heard.”

“I don’t care what happened in my universe. Both of you there at the same time, she’s so the Alpha out of you two,” said Dean.

“Eh, being an Omega’s not so bad, right?” said Jensen. 

“I’m sure she wouldn’t have minded you being the one that popped out the twins,” said Dean with a laugh. 

“You’re joking,” said Jensen.

“Remember that sex ed book? Nope,” said Dean.

“Where…” said Jensen, Dean glancing around Jensen. “No way.”

“Yup,” said Dean, sighing when he heard Danneel tutting behind him. “Gettin’ me in trouble with the boss lady already.”

“Boys,” said Danneel, a smile in her voice. “Jensen, Dean. This is Ana. Today’s her first day. She’s going to be helping out in the office, events, odds and ends. Ana, this is Jensen.”

“Hello sir,” she said, giving Jensen a handshake.

“Oh god, I’m your boss but please don’t ever call me sir again,” said Jensen with a smile. “We’re sort of a bunch of goofballs around here.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” she said, turning to Dean. “Hi.”

“Hi,” said Dean, staring at her as she held out her hand. Jensen saw Dean blank out for a second, shaking his head and quickly accepting the handshake. “Dean.”

“Like Dean Winchester?” she said with a little laugh. Dean shook his head, dropping his face away after a moment. “Sorry.”

“No, no...you’re uh…” said Dean, Jensen catching a bit of flush in his cheeks.

“Let’s introduce you to everyone else and then Dean can be your training buddy for the day. He just started this week too,” said Danneel.

“Okay. Bye Jensen. Dean,” said Ana, giving them both a smile as she left with Danneel.

“She was cute,” said Jensen, Dean shrugging. “Dude.”

“Maybe...she was a little cute,” mumbled Dean.

“Too bad you were too busy trying not to blush you didn’t notice she was doing it too,” said Jensen. 

“She did not,” said Dean.

“Gonna have to find out for yourself, Deanie,” teased Jensen.

“Eh, go screw yourself, Jenny,” said Dean.

“Love you too. Brother,” said Jensen with a laugh, pausing when he caught Dean’s face. “Sorry.”

“No, it’s...it’s not you. S’just weird,” said Dean. “I used to know a girl in my world, looked just like her.”

“Really?” said Jensen, turning around, catching the Danneel and Ana walk out of the back of the brewery.

“It was when Sammy was in college. I was working this hunt, a little big for me to be working on my own. I met this hunter, was going to work it with him, my dad gave him a call. The guy was a bit of an ass. He said ‘his girl’ would show me the ropes. He left and this chick, ain’t even old enough to drink, she walks in the bar, orders a beer, tells them I’m paying for it, knocks it back and then tells me to get my perky ass going cause we got a restless spirit to take care of. I thought she was a bit of an ass like her old man but it was a front, we all got fronts in that world. She was stitching up my arm in my motel room when it was finished, had this cute little smile and bam, her heat hits. She’s freaking out because it’s way off schedule and then bam, my rut hits and that’s way off schedule too and we realize...true mates,” said Dean with a smirk. “I actually had an Omega. Can you believe that?”

“That’s great man,” said Jensen, already having an idea of where this story was going.

“You’re the first person I ever told that to. Not even Sammy knows I had a mate,” said Dean, rubbing the back of his neck. “It wasn’t even a hunt that got her. A silly car accident. We barely got a few months together.”

“I’m sorry. I can’t even imagine,” said Jensen. 

“No,” said Dean. “You can’t.”

“I can ask De to keep her away if-”

“No, no. It was a long time ago. It’s not her. I’m okay, seriously,” said Dean.

“Alright,” said Jensen. “I’ll see you at home later then.”

Two Days Later

“Daddy,” said Zeppelin, tugging on Dean’s jeans, Dean giving him a smile. “Oh. Uncle De, where’s daddy?”

“He’s playing with your sisters upstairs,” said Dean. “You want to go play with them?”

“No,” he said, walking away, Danneel giving him a smile as he plopped down in the living room.

“Alright, Uncle Dean,” she said, patting Dean’s arms. “Ready for your date tonight?”

“It’s not a date,” said Dean, running his hand over the gray button down Jensen had loaned him.

“It’s so a date,” said Jensen, walking down the stairs, patting Dean’s shoulder. “Come here.”

Jensen slipped on a pair of shoes and Dean followed him outside, handing him the keys to his truck.

“This where you tell me not to screw up this poor girl,” said Dean.

“This is where I tell you...have some fun tonight. We hardly ever see you crack a smile unless you’re with the kids,” said Jensen.

“Sam’s accepted that this is where we live now. I haven’t,” said Dean. “He’s making plans for apartments and I’m up half the night researching to get back.”

“Get back to what? To getting hurt all the time? Dying? Hunting?” said Jensen.

“It’s all I got, Jensen,” said Dean. “That and being an Alpha.”

“Well you’re not an Alpha anymore. You’re Dean and you get to start over fresh, be what you want. We’ll help you with whatever you decide. But you have to live your life,” said Jensen.

“I’m too fucked up,” he said. Jensen hummed and crossed his arms.

“I see. We’re gonna have to do this the hard way,” said Jensen. Dean rolled his eyes and started to walk away. “Hey. Winchester.”

“What,” said Dean with a sigh.

“Talk with Jared sometime,” said Jensen. Dean turned around and raised an eyebrow. “Just cause we don’t fight monsters doesn’t mean we don’t have demons in this family. Talk to him tomorrow. Jared’ll be honest with you. He’ll set your head straight.”

“Why? You sick of me already?” scoffed Dean.

“Because in case you forgot,” said Jensen, stepping up to Dean’s face, “You didn’t just get me as a brother. You got Jared too. I’m good at being there but Jared...you have more in common than you think. Just talk to him for me. For Sam. Please.”

“You’re not my brother,” mumbled Dean. 

“Yeah. I am,” said Jensen, Dean staring at him. “Neither one of us picked this but it’s what we got. You know, like siblings. You don’t get to pick those.”

“You’re so annoying,” said Dean.

“I”m the older brother. Of course I’m annoying,” said Jensen with a smirk.

“I was in Hell for forty years. I say that makes me older,” said Dean, narrowing his eyes as Jensen swallowed. He sighed and dropped his head. “I’m sorry. Forget I said that.”

“It’s alright,” said Jensen, digging into his back pocket and pulling out his credit card. “Have fun on your date. My treat.”

“I got a job. I can pay,” said Dean.

“Dude. Just take it. It’s your first date in this universe. It’s my treat and De ain’t gonna be happy if you say no,” said Jensen.

“Fine. It’s probably going to go horrible anyways,” he said as he took the card.

“Have fun, Dean!”

“Hey,” said Jensen when Dean walked into the kitchen the next morning, picking JJ up from her seat at the counter and sitting down, resting her in his lap. “How’d it go?”

“Good,” he yawned, JJ grabbing his cheeks. “Good morning, sweetie.”

“Uncle Dean, it’s my seat,” she said.

“Can we share?” he asked.

“Fine,” she said, grabbing his shirt and tilting her head. “You got a tattoo like dad?”

“This?” he asked, glancing at Jensen when he pulled down his Henley and showed off his anti-possession tattoo.

“I only got the three, honey. Yours and the twins and the crown,” said Jensen, sliding two plates of eggs on the counter. He walked around and picked her up, plopping her in the seat next to Dean. 

“Uncle Dean, are you gonna live with us forever?” asked JJ as she started to eat.

“No. Not forever,” said Dean with half a smile.

“Can you? Please?” she asked.

“I’ll stick around a while, how’s that sound?” asked Dean.

“Fine,” she grumbled.

“So how was the date?” asked Jensen.

“You know, a date,” said Dean.

“You gonna see Ana again?” he asked.

“I don’t know. Feels funny,” said Dean, wolfing down his food quickly. “I’m gonna go for a walk before it gets too hot out. I’ll see you guys.”

He stood and headed upstairs, JJ giving her father a look.

“Dad, why’s Uncle Dean so sad all the time?” she asked.

“It’s a lot of grown up stuff,” he said. 

“Can you fix it?” she asked.

“Maybe. Give Uncle Dean and Sam a few extra hugs for me when you see them honey,” he said.

“You got it, dad.”

“Hey,” said Jensen, finding Dean out by Jared’s pool a few hours later. “Where’s Sam?”

“Grocery store. Gen’s bringing the kids over your place to swim,” said Jared.

“So, what? You two need a ride?” chuckled Jensen.

“No. Dean came over this morning and we’ve been talking,” said Jared. “I thought it might be good to get you involved.”

“What’s up?” asked Jensen, taking a seat on a patio chair. 

“I think we all know Dean’s struggling with this...adjustment. Sam and I have noticed it and we’re sure you see it too. Add that on top of everything that these guys normally go through and this is where we end up,” said Jared.

“You okay?” asked Jensen, Dean sighing.

“In this world, you’re pack leader. Maybe you don’t realize but you are. I could get over the hunting if I could still be an Alpha, still have that,” said Dean.

“We don’t have that in our world, Dean,” said Jensen, tilting his head back. “I’m not a pack leader either. I’m part of a family, one you’re part of now. I know that this one is different than what you’re used to. I get it, man. We all do. But if you’re struggling, let us help.”

“I don’t know what I need,” said Dean.

“We don’t film until when, Tuesday afternoon?” asked Jensen after a moment.

“Nope,” said Jared, pulling out his phone. “You want me to reschedule our flight for Tuesday morning?”

“Yeah. I think a boys weekend with us and Sam is in order,” said Jensen with a smirk.

“Same place as we went last time?” asked Jared. 

“Yeah. You mind getting it reserved and I’ll get these boys packed up?” said Jensen.

“Where are we going?” asked Dean as Jensen pulled him to his feet.

“Trust us. You guys will like it.”

“Nice,” said Jared when Dean reeled in a fish late that afternoon. “That’s your fourth one already.”

“Must be a better fisherman in this universe,” Dean chuckled. He unhooked the fish and dropped it back in the water, Sam sighing from the other side of the dock. “Patience, Sammy.”

“I’m getting hungry,” he said. 

“Me too. Dean, how do you like your steak done?” asked Jared as he reeled in his line.

“Medium’s always good,” he said.

“Alright. You guys set the table out back and we’ll handle the food tonight,” said Jared, heading towards the small cabin with Sam.

“He a good cook?” asked Dean.

“He knows his way around a grill,” said Jensen, taking a sip of his beer. “You seem more relaxed here.”

“Not used to the real world still I suppose,” said Dean.

“Well, we rented the cabin for three weeks. You and Sam can come by anytime you want. Quiet place to be yourself,” he said.

“I like people. I want to be Dean Winchester again is all,” he said.

“You are. You’re a badass. I know that. But you gotta relax before you pop.”

“Maybe I haven’t been trying as much as I say I have been,” said Dean.

“When I was stuck, all I wanted was to go home,” said Jensen. “I understand.”

“Nothing bad happens here,” said Dean after a moment.

“Bad stuff happens. It’s not monsters that cause it is all,” said Jensen. “I think that’s what you struggle with.”

“There’s nothing for me to do here,” said Dean. “Nothing bad to stop. No pack to lead.”

“There’s plenty of bad to stop. Sam still needs you. I think you have to change that idea in your head of what that means is all,” said Jensen.

“Do you always have to be so annoyingly optimistic?” asked Dean.

“I want you to feel better is all.”

“Why?”

“You’ve been one of my best friends for fifteen years. I care about you. I didn’t know you were real until recently but you taught me a few things over the years. If you could stop being such a dick, it’d be nice,” he said.

“I’m your best friend? You sure you ain’t nuts, Jenny?” asked Dean.

“Why wouldn’t I be? Also, you so put my head at rest knowing a freaking hunter is home with my family to watch out for them when I’m not there,” he said.

“I never thought of it like that,” he said, a small smile on his face. “You got no idea how lucky you are, man.”

“I know. Maybe when we get back from our trip, you can hang with Ana again. She’s cute. You seemed like you liked her,” he said.

“I did. I’ll think about it,” he said. “Would you mind if I did something with the kids next week? Like after school?”

“Not at all. You don’t have to ask permission. I see how good you are with them and I’m sure De would love a few hours to herself,” he said, pulling his line in. “Why don’t you stay a bit longer. I can setup.”

“Alright,” said Dean as Jensen stood up. “Jensen.”

“Hm?”

“Thanks. You and Jared for taking care of us. You could have left us on our own to figure all this out,” he said.

“S’not our style,” said Jensen. “Food’ll be done in probably twenty.”

“What are you, my mother? I got it,” he said, waving him off.

Jensen smiled as he headed back to the cabin, Jared heating up the grill on the deck.

“You think he’s doing better?” asked Jared.

“Yeah. I think these guys are gonna be alright.”

_________

[what-is-your-plan-today]

Stark Spangled Forever: Stendhal Syndrome

Part 1- Brat

Intro: It’s Rori’s fifth birthday party, and there’s someone there who Katie doesn’t really appreciate hanging round her man.

And Steve doesn’t really appreciate Katie’s attitude either.

Uh Oh….

Warnings: Bad language.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

A/N: This was a one shot. I got carried away and wrote 24 pages. So now you have a duo shot thanks to that photo sending me to a dirty place. No smut in this one…but it’s on its way in the next part! Also apologies for the lack of formatting on here…my laptop is screwy….

SSF Masterlist // WIYPT Masterlist

May 2029

“Katie…” Steve called up the stairs. He waited for a moment. There was no response. “Honey?”

Still nothing.

He bounded up the steps, taking them two at a time and headed over the landing and into their room. He paused in the doorway, smiling gently as he saw his wife curled upon the bed, Harry snuggled into her, his head tucked under her chin as they both slept. He wasn’t surprised they were both flat out. They’d had a rough time with the tot the previous night. He had woken up at about 2 am crying and Steve had gone into find both he and his bed full of vomit. After they’d cleaned him up he’d continued to be sick, grumpy and teary, and hadn’t settled even when they’d brought him into bed with them. Eventually Katie had given up and taken him downstairs. Steve had initially gotten up with them but Katie had sent him back to bed pointing out that one of them needed to be with it enough to look after the others the day after. It was also an unspoken fact that they both knew Harry wouldn’t settle for his dad when he was like this. Steve thought Jamie was a momma’s boy but that was nothing compared to their youngest.

He gently closed the door and headed back downstairs and into the den where Jamie was sat cross legged on the rug faffing with some Lego and Rori was perched watching The Wizard of Oz.

“Guys, what do you fancy for lunch?”

“Are you making it?” Jamie looked up at him. Steve snorted.

“Fraid so pal. Momma’s asleep with Harry.”

“Is Harry still sick?” Rori looked around, her eyes wide.

“He’s ok sweetie.” Steve assured her “He just has a tummy bug.”

“Or he ate your cooking.” Emmy said from behind Steve as she passed him heading into the kitchen.

“Enough cheek thank you.” Steve said, raising an eyebrow at her back. He heard her chuckle as she opened the fridge.

“Jamie its ok…” she called “There’s left over lasagne.”

“Yesss.” Jamie said, jumping up off the rug. “Mom’s lasagne is the best.”

“Daddy?” Rori spoke again, her round green eyes looking at Steve.

“Yes baby?”

“Will Harry be ok for my birthday party?”

Steve noticed her biting her lip, the same expression Katie wore when she was worried. With a soft chuckle he crossed the room and knelt down in front of her. “Of course he will, it’s not for another week yet.”

She considered his answer and nodded. Steve reached out and gently tucked her dark hair behind her ears. It was then he noticed her lip wobbling.

“Hey…” he said, frowning, as he stood up to sit besides her. She crawled onto his lap and tucked her face into his shirt “What’s wrong?” She sniffled slightly and pressed her face further into his chest. Steve gently rubbed her back and stayed still waiting for her to speak.

“Jemima at school…” she sniffled, and Steve took a deep breath. He knew where this was going. “Her brother got sick and he dieded.” “Ok…” he said gently, “Jemima’s brother was very poorly. Harry just has a tummy bug. I promise you Rori, he’s not going to die.” She sniffed again and looked up at him “Pinkie promise?”

He smiled and held up his hand, little finger extended “pinkie promise.” She mimicked him and intertwined her small finger with his before she reached up and wrapped her arms round his neck, nuzzling her head into the space against his cheek.

“Why is your face always scratchy?” she asked and Steve gave a laugh.

“Blame your Momma, she won’t let me shave.” he said and Rori pulled back, her little hands raking into his beard. He playfully snapped at her fingers with his teeth, a loud clicking noise sounding as he bit onto thin air and she giggled.

“You gonna come get some lunch?” he looked at her. She nodded and he stood up with her in his arms, carrying her through to the kitchen where Emmy was already halfway through making a salad to go with the leftovers which were heating in the microwave.

“Thanks Em.” Steve said, dropping Rori onto a chair by the table before he moved over to grab some plates.

“Think we should save mom some?”

“No it’s ok.” Steve shook his head “if she’s hungry when she wakes I’ll make her a sandwich.”

Emmy nodded. “Oh, I thought Peter and Brooke could come over later, if that’s ok? I mean, if Harry’s not still sick.” “They can come over anyway, it’s fine.” Steve said, “Harry will most likely be upstairs anyway.”

“We were just gonna hang out by the pool for the evening…” “Em.” Steve chuckled “It’s fine…” and then he paused and smirked slightly as he looked at her “You want the beer don’t you?”

She wrinkled her nose and nodded.

“There’s plenty in the bar…just don’t get that drunk one of you drowns.” he said after a pause. “Explaining that to Peter’s Aunt or Jennifer would be a bit awkward.”

“Thanks dad.” she smiled at him.

They ate their lunch, the 4 of them chatting away, Steve pleased to see Rori was settled now, her earlier upset forgotten. Once they were finished Emmy took Rori and Jamie out into the garden to play on the jungle gym whilst Steve cleared the dishes. Every so often he glanced out of the window to see the kids playing a soft smile on his face. He enjoyed days like this, weekends or during the holidays when they were all together. It was just a shame their brother was too poorly to join in. He called out of the open door to tell Emmy he was nipping upstairs before he repeated the journey he had taken a little over and hour ago, checking his watch.

Katie glanced up as he opened the door, her finger on her lips.

“Hey…” he whispered.

She smiled and gave a soft yawn “How long have I been asleep?”

“Not sure sweetheart.” he said, “I came up about an hour or so ago and you were flat out.”

She gave another yawn and Harry stirred gently, his hand rubbing at his eyes before he settled back down. Katie gently felt his head.

“He’s not as warm as he was.” she said as Steve gently perched on the bed, smoothing back his son’s dark blonde hair.

“Rori got really upset.” he said, smiling softly “She mentioned Jemima’s brother.”

Katie sighed and frowned “Yeah. It was hard trying to explain that when we heard the news. Is she ok?”

“She’s fine.” he assured her “Gave her a pinkie promise Harry only had a tummy bug so.”

“Daddy’s girl.” she smiled and Steve gave a gentle chuckle.

“Peter and Brooke are coming over later.” he said “Emmy wants to hang out in the pool house with a few beers.” Katie smirked “You’re definitely going soft in your old age.”

“Well Emmy is 21 now so I can’t stop her and as for Pete and Brooke, well, sooner they do it here than in a bar.” he shrugged. “You want some lunch?”

Katie shook her head “I’ll eat later.”

Harry stirred again, only this time he grumbled slightly and blinked, opening his eyes sleepily. He looked at his momma before he nuzzled into her closer, his hand winding into her hair as he started to grizzle slightly.

“Hey baby…” she said, kissing his head.

He mumbled something again, his noises not quite forming into words yet, still being half asleep, and then he turned his head to peek up at his dad.

“You ok Pal?”

Harry eyed him for a moment before he moved and held out his arms in Steve’s direction. Slightly surprised Steve moved to take him in an embrace as the little boy snuggled into his chest and Steve kissed his head. Katie smiled, the sight of Steve with his kids was something she would never get tired of. Being a father brought out all his best qualities, just like the serum had amplified them, having kids had too.  He was loving, patient, gentle yet strong, stern and happy to deal out the discipline when appropriate.

She sat up, pecking him on the cheek at the point where his beard met smooth skin. “You know you might not have the shield anymore but you’ll always be their superhero.”

********

Much to Rori’s relief (and everyone else in the Rogers household for that matter) Harry’s illness only lasted 24 hours and he was back to his cheeky, happy little self the next morning. Arrangements pressed ahead for the party, it wasn’t a huge gathering-namely Rori’s closest friends from school and family- which was to take place the weekend before her birthday.  As she shared her day of birth with her late uncle, Katie always found the day a little bittersweet but she tried to keep any of her sadness and nostalgia at bay for the sake of her little girl and focus on the celebration instead.

By 2pm in the afternoon their garden was packed with 7 other 5 year olds, a couple of parents and the usual additional suspects, namely Morgan and Pepper, Jennifer and Brooke along with Bucky and Sam. Rori had stipulated that she didn’t want any games or anything, just to play in the garden on a bouncy castle with some “Princess Punch” which was basically pink lemonade full of chopped up strawberries and raspberries, something her dad had made her one day and she insisted that no one else could make it the same. So, that’s what she had gotten.

“So who’s the blonde Katie’s throwing shade at?” Sam asked as Steve handed him a beer. Steve groaned. Rori’s best friend, a girl called Aurelia was obviously at the party. And so was her mother. A certain Dani-with-an-I, the real-estator who had shown them around the first house they had looked at in Brooklyn all those years ago But, as Steve knew only too well, his wife held a grudge better than anyone he had ever met in his life.

Ever.

Sam gave a loud snort of laughter as Steve explained about the whole incident when they'd been looking round the house and Dani flirting with him whilst Bucky took another Asgardian beer from the stack Steve had placed in a specific chiller in the garage and popped the top off effortlessly with his metal hand. The three men emerged out of the side door back onto the garden, taking up their spot by the side of the garden overseeing the proceedings whilst the women were perched on the decking which ran flush along the back of the house. Katie was milling around the garden somewhere, making sure everyone was ok.

“Bet that makes for interesting conversations when Aurelia comes for sleepovers…” Bucky mused.

“Katie’s not callous enough to have issues with a child simply because she doesn’t like her mother.” Steve shook his head, immediately defending his wife. “In fact she’s nothing but welcoming to her, she’s Rori’s friend after all. She just keeps any exchanges between her and Dani to a minimum.”

“Well, you best watch your back…” Sam said “Because it looks like she’s heading over.”

Steve sighed and spun round to face Dani as she approached him.

“Hi Steve…”

“Hey Dani.” he said “Everything ok.”

“I don’t want to cause a fuss but, well Jamie and Morgan are causing a bit of an issue.”

“Issue?” Steve frowned. At that point Rori came running over to him, tears flooding from her face. “Princess…” he crouched down. “What’s wrong?”

“Jamie and Morgan are throwing those little ball thingies that bang at everyone!” Rori said, stamping her feet. Steve glared up at Bucky.

“I told you not to give him those!” “I aint given him any for weeks!” Bucky held his hands up. “He’s clearly stashed them…I’m sorry Rori…”

“What have you done now?” Bucky turned to see Katie stood there, her eyebrows raised, sunglasses perched on her head as they acted like a headband, keeping her long hair off her face.

“Given Jamie contraband.” Sam said.

“Those damned firecrackers?”

Bucky shrugged.

“You’re an ass.” she said to him as she crouched down to look at Rori. “You ok sweetie?”

“He keeps throwing them at me!” she yelled.

“Ok…” Katie soothed her, and Steve took the opportunity to glance at his wife. She still knocked him off his feet after all these years. Her make-up was light, leaving those freckles he adored on show, and the pale yellow and blue maxi dress she was wearing complimented her amazing figure and curves to perfection, leaving her shoulders bare bar the thin spaghetti straps which crossed at the back. And it was low cut enough that Steve could see a fair bit of sideboob as well. Which he would never complain about. She turned to Steve, raised her eyebrow as his gaze lifted from her chest to her eyes. “Did you hear a word of that?”

“No.” he said honestly. She snorted.

“I just said that you’d go and speak to Jamie and Morgan.” she said, nodding to Rori.

“I’ll deal with your brother, I promise…” Steve confirmed “Go and play and don’t worry about it…”

He wiped her tears away with his hands, gave her a kiss and stood up

“Where are they?”

“By the side of the pool house.” Katie responded at the same time Dani said the same thing.

“We got it, thanks…” Katie looked at the woman. She nodded and sidled off, Steve ignored the look of utter glee that Sam and Bucky shared at the fact Katie was getting all “Starky Snarky” as Sam called it. Katie watched her leave before she turned back to Steve, ignoring the look he was giving her. “Spotted the little shits before.” she continued “They’re trying to hide behind the stack of sun-loungers”

He nodded, dropped a kiss to Katie’s lips and headed off to find the trouble makers. He took the long way, striding round the edge of the pool so they wouldn’t see him coming. He stood simply watching them for a moment. Jamie and Morgan were thick as thieves. With little over a year between them, they’d practically grown up as brother and sister, which Steve and Katie loved, but they were a recipe for trouble. With Morgan’s cleverness and Jamie’s penchant for mischief they made a right pair. Jamie said something to Morgan and she sniggered and they both stood up which was when Steve made his move. He gently grabbed Jamie’s collar and the back of Morgan’s top, pulling them back, ignoring their yells of protest as he bent over.

“If you two don’t stop right now, you’re gonna be in big trouble.” his voice was low and steely as he spoke and the pair of them stiffened slightly. He let go and stood up, hands on his hips.

“Dad, we were only-“

“Son…” Steve cut him off, holding his hand up in an instruction to stay quiet “Just don’t.” He held his palm out in front of him “Hand em over…”

With a sigh and a scowl Jamie emptied his pockets, Morgan following suit and they both passed Steve the small boxes of the little white firecrackers.

“I mean it you two. One more toe out of line…”

“Sorry Uncle Spangles.” Morgan bowed her head.

“It isn’t me you should be apologising to” he said, looking at the 10 year old. She was getting more and more like Tony with each day that passed. He felt a little pang for his brother-in-law as he looked into her brown eyes and took a deep breath, his voice softer when he spoke again “Go and say sorry to Rori, both of you.”

********

“What’s Morgan done?” Pepper asked as Katie headed up to the decking.

Katie snorted “Her and Jamie have been throwing firecrackers.”

Pepper groaned “I’ll have a word…”

“It’s ok… Steve’s sorting it.” Katie shrugged “No biggie, just being kids…”

“I don’t understand how she can be so like Tony when he’s not around.” Pepper said gently.

“Stark DNA.” Katie grinned, “it’s strong.”

Pepper snorted. “Yeah, it must be.”

The two women watched as Steve spoke to the kids, taking the boxes off them before dismissing them. He strode across the lawn, looked up at Katie and gave her a smile before he made his way into the garage to dispose of the offensive ‘weapons’.

“Where did they even get them from?” Pepper asked.

“Bucky” answered Jennifer and Katie the same time. Katie glanced back over the garden, everything seemed to be back to normal. Her eyes fell on Dani who was now stood with one of the other mums that Katie had been speaking to earlier.

“Who’s that?” Jennifer asked.

“Some tramp.” Katie shrugged.

“Her name is Dani.” Pepper snorted “With an I…”

“Was she the last Trashbag you had to take out one morning?” Katie asked. “She mentioned something about that last time I met her and she does look a familiar.”

Pepper snorted. “No…she never got there. Not for the lack of trying. But you’re right, she does look a little like Christine Everhart.”

“Of course…” Katie snorted, “Christine…”

Katie wandered through from the kitchen in her cami and short pyjama set, clutching a bowl of cereal, groaning at the raging headache she was sporting. She was visiting home for a week or so to attend the Apogee Award ceremony in Vegas, which was honouring her brother. Pity he hadn’t actually cared enough to attend himself, instead living it up in the Casino. Obediah had accepted the award for him and then she’d continued drinking with the rest of the party that had turned up…and continued the drinking on the private jet home.  As she shuffled into the living area, she stopped dead looking at the blonde woman, dressed in nothing but one of Tony’s shirts as she sloped around their living area. Another one of Tony’s bimbos that he picked up in Vegas and flown home with them. Said bimbo made her way over to the pad that led to the workshop and pressed a few buttons.

“Hey, Tony?”

“You are not authorized to access this area.” Jarvis said, making her scream and jump. Katie sniggered.

“Jesus.” the woman said.

“No, JARVIS…” Katie spoke loudly and the woman span around. “He runs the house.”

“You must be Katie…”

“And you must be Miss Saturday.” Katie shrugged, sitting on the sofa “Well, for this week anyway…”

“Christine…” she said. “We met last night…”

“Yeah I don’t bother learning names.” Katie shrugged. “They never last long enough for me to give a shit.”

At that point Pepper walked into the room holding up a clothes carrier.

“I’ve got your clothes here. They’ve been dry-cleaned and pressed, and there’s a car waiting for you outside that will take you anywhere you’d like to go.” She said, smiling at the woman.

“You must be the famous Pepper Potts.”

“Indeed I am.” Pepper smiled.

“After all these years, Tony still has you picking up the dry-cleaning.” she commented sarcastically.

“Bitch.” Katie said loudly. Christine looked at her but Pepper simply remained still and smiled, her tone pleasant and even.

“I do anything and everything that Mr. Stark requires, including, occasionally, taking out the trash.”

At that Katie choked slightly on her cereal and looked up as the smug bint’s smirk slid off her face.

“Will that be all?” Pepper asked.

Christine took the hangar and sidled off.

“Taking out the trash…” Katie grinned “Pepper that was fucking genius!”

Pepper arched an eyebrow.

“Where is my dickhead brother?”

“Where do you think?” Pepper asked.

Katie hummed and put down her empty cereal bowl before she made her way through the door Christine had been trying to unlock and down to Tony’s workshop.

“JARVIS, lower that racket…” she muttered.

“Certainly Miss Stark…” 

The noise dimmed and Tony wheeled round “Please don’t turn down my music” “Good morning to you too.” Katie rolled her eyes “Last night’s conquest has left. Pepper just threw her out.”

“Speaking of which, you are supposed to be halfway around the world right now.” Pepper appeared but Tony wasn’t listening.

“How’d she take it?” He looked at Katie. 

“Like a champ.” she shrugged.

Tony grinned and then turned to Pepper “Why are you trying to hustle me out of here?”

“Your flight was scheduled to leave an hour and a half ago.”

“That’s funny, I thought with it being my plane and all, that it would just wait for me to get there.” Tony quipped sarcastically.

“Tony, I need to speak to you about a couple things before I get you out of the door”

“Doesn’t it kind of defeat the whole purpose of having your own plane if it departs before you arrive?” Tony continue and then Pepper’s voice rose.

At that point Katie groaned and decided she needed to go to bed before she split for her own flight home and left them to it. 24 hours later she was back in London, getting the notice from Rhodey that Tony was missing…

Laughter dragged Katie back out of her memory and she wiped her eyes slightly, memories of her brother still hit her hard. She turned to catch the last of Pepper’s explanation about Dani’s ‘antics’ at a Stark Party once to which Jennifer, Emmy and Brooke were all laughing along with as Pepper glanced at Katie.

“What is she doing here anyway?”

“Well, her daughter happens to be Rori’s bestest friend in the whole world.” Katie said, repeating the words Rori used to describe Aurelia her “And of course when I asked a few parents on the invites to join, she jumped at the chance.”

There was a pause as they all continued to watch the woman as she tilted her head back and laughed at something that one of the other mom’s had said.

“Is her hair even real?” Emmy asked suddenly.

“Nope. And neither are her tits…” Jennifer mumbled. “Aint no way she’s had a kid and they’re still…” she grabbed her own breasts and hoisted them up, causing all the women to snigger into their drinks.

“Momma?” Katie spun to look at Rori who was grinning up at her mum.

“Hey sweetie” Katie smiled, crouching down “You ok now?”

Rori nodded “Please can I get a drink?”

“Course you can baby…” Katie smiled “Why don’t you go ask daddy to grab you some of the Princess Punch?”

She gave her daughter a kiss on the cheek before she skipped off down the lawn to where Steve was stood with Bucky and Sam. Katie watched as he immediately looked down when Rori tugged at his black jeans. With a huge, genuine smile he swept her up, her legs causing Steve’s sweater to ride up and at the flash of his toned stomach Katie bit her lip.

“Down girl..” Jennifer mumbled and Katie snorted.

“That obvious?”

“You’re not exactly subtle…” Pepper smirked “That’s the Stark in you.”

Behind her she heard Emmy groan before Brooke quipped “Em, not being funny, but your dad is hot.”

“Fuck off.” Emmy shot back as Brooke cackled “That’s disgusting.”

“His best friend ain’t bad either…” Jenifer mused, cocking her head to one side as Bucky reached up to gently ruffle Rori’s hair, and then tilting his head towards her as she reached to do the same to him, a huge smile spreading across his face.

“Eww.” Brooke groaned, and this time it was Emmy’s turn to laugh.

“Speaking of which, where’s Peter?” Katie turned to Emmy.

“He’s dropping May and Happy at the airport and coming down later…” she said, a faint pink tinge on her cheeks. Katie looked at Pepper, the pair of them smiling to one another. Emmy and Peter had been pretty on and off over the last 5 years but seemed to have been going pretty steady over the last 12 months.

“Which reminds me, can you tell Dad and Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dee to behave?” Emmy looked at her mum “They’re always teasing Pete…” “That is a right of passage.” Pepper said wisely “Tony was a shit to Steve when he started dating Katie.” “Tony was a shit to Steve way before that.” Katie grinned “But I gotta admit, he was never that pleased about how he found out.” “Which was?” Jennifer looked her.

“He walked in and found us in the kitchen half dressed…” Katie shrugged “Was his own fault, he should have knocked instead of swanning into my apartment like he owned it.” “Yeah, I don’t…” Emmy started before she shook her head “Shut up!”

“Erm, where are you two off to?” Katie heard Pepper say and she looked up to see Morgan and Jamie half in, half out of the kitchen door.

“The den Auntie Pep.” Jamie answered. “Gonna go watch a film.”

“Least you can’t cause any trouble in there…yes, I heard.” Pepper said sternly “Another toe out of line Morgan H Stark and I’ll take you home.”

“Sorry Mom…” she said, and Pepper dismissed her.

Katie smiled again and her attention turned back to the party. She glanced over the garden and was just about to head down to mingle again, not wanting to leave the rest of the parents feeling awkward when a certain blonde haired tramp caught her attention. She watched her for a moment as she walked over to Steve and then stiffened slightly as she touched his arm, but then she stepped way over the line.

“Oh hell no bitch…” Katie’s eyes narrowed as she saw Dani kiss Steve’s cheek.

“Kick her ass mom…” Emmy mumbled.

“Hold my beer…” Katie said, before she paused “Actually, on second thoughts… I’ll take the beer with me…”

“$50 dollars says Trashbag is leaving here in a box…” Brooke quipped. Pepper, Jennifer and Emmy all sniggered.

********

After getting Rori a glass of punch and retrieving another 3 beers for him, Sam and Bucky, Steve headed back across the lawn, Rori still following him.

“Daddy…” she spoke again.

“Yeah?” he looked at her.

“What are tits?”

Steve choked on his beer and heard Sam’s guffawing laughter from the side of him, punctuated by Bucky’s snorts.

“Ermmm…” Steve wiped at his sweater where his beer had slopped down the front and racked his brains “They’re a type of bird…” The laugher and snorts grew even louder. Steve looked at Rori who was frowning before she shook her head “Why would Aurelia’s mommy have fake birds?”

At that Sam began to cough, and Steve looked at him. He was doubled over, slapping his knees. Bucky was wiping his eyes and gave Steve a thumbs up. “Fake birds, I can’t…”  Bucky’s hand fell to Sam’s back as the pair of them continued to laugh.

“I don’t know…” Steve looked at Rori. “Who said that anyway?”

“Jennifer.” she said, and Steve rolled his eyes and glanced over at his wife who was stood, looking out over the garden. “Well Jennifer is just being silly.” Steve looked back at Rori “Don’t worry about it.”

Rori accepted his answer and ran off.

“You can stop laughing now.” he turned to his friends.

“Man, I love your kids.” Bucky said as Sam straightened up, wiping his eyes.

“Yeah well right now they’re behaving better than their mother.” Steve frowned.

“I dare you to say that to her face.” Bucky smirked “And whilst you’re at it, you can tell Jennifer you think she’s silly…”

Steve shook his head “I’m quite attached to my balls thanks, and I’d like to keep it that way.”

“Good luck with that…” Sam said, “Blonde haired real estator at 12 o’clock.”

Steve let out a silent groan, he really didn’t need this.

“Steve…” he felt an hand on his arm.

“Yeah?” he turned to face Dani, polite as always.

“I’m sorry about before,I didn’t want to get the kids into trouble.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Steve shrugged “Jamie and Morgan are a handful together.”

Dani laughed, and then stood on her tip toes to kiss his cheek. Steve hadn’t seen that coming. He stepped away slightly and gave her a smile as she looked at him.

“Well, Aurelia was really upset so thank you for sorting it out…”

“Wife…6 o’clock…” Bucky mumbled. But he needn’t have bothered, Steve knew his wife was behind him even before she slipped her arms round his waist, the hand that wasn’t clutching the beer bottle gently slipping under his black sweater, rubbing his stomach softly. He smiled to himself, knowing full well she was here to make a point, and gently placed his large hand over hers.

“Hey beautiful.” he said softly and Katie felt that fire in her belly light even more at his soft words.

“Hey…” she mumbled, pressing her face into his back, gently kissing between his shoulder blades through his sweater before she moved and slid into the space under his arm, placing herself between him and Dani. Steve rolled his eyes at his wife’s passive aggressive display of possessiveness and glanced at Sam who was grinning ear to ear, watching the exchange.

“You know, Mrs Rogers…” Dani smiled at Katie, ”I was just wondering if we were past the formalities of using our surnames now seeing as our daughters are inseparable? ”

She started to laugh and Katie continued to smile before she replied “Nope, I’m good with Mrs Rogers thanks.

Sam started to cough, which was clearly to cover up a laugh. Steve looked at him to see him smirking ear to ear.

“How’s your husband?” Katie looked Dani. “I don’t see him…”

“We’re not together anymore.” Dani said, her smile faltering slightly

“Oh, sorry to her that.” Katie replied, although her tone said otherwise “Guess he wasn’t a fan of you touching what doesn’t belong to you either.”

Dani’s face slipped, but luckily for her one of the other mom’s called her name and she excused herself. Katie watched her go before she felt Steve move his arm from her shoulders.

“That was mean.” he looked at Katie, his brow furrowed.

“I don’t like people touching my stuff…” Katie shrugged.

“You’re a fucking brat.” Steve said sternly, his face displaying no humour. Katie was completely unabashed by his tone and shrugged again

“I warned her last time I’d snap her hand off. She got off lightly.”

With that she turned and walked back towards Pepper and Jennifer. Steve watched her go, his face flushed with anger at her childish display.

“Damned…” Bucky whistled out. “I know you said she could be vicious, Steve, but wow…”

“I think that’s called marking your territory.” Sam quipped as Steve shook his head, the nerve in his jaw twitching.

“It’s called being rude.” He said, before he drained his beer and tossed the empty into one of the recycling tubs by the table “Scuse me fellas, I need to go have a word with my wife…” Bucky and Sam watched as he strode across the lawn, hand pushing his hair back off his face. He reached Katie, acknowledge the women before he gently wrapped his hand around her arm and bent to speak into her ear. She looked at him, frowned, and then allowed him to lead her inside.

“So now they’re gonna have a row and then angry sex, right?” Bucky looked at Sam. Sam nodded.

“Totally…shall we join the ladies?”

“Good idea.” Bucky agreed.

*******

“Uh oh Dad’s approaching…” Emmy said to her mum.

“Is he pissed?” Katie asked, grimacing slightly. As soon as he’d chastised her before she knew he wouldn’t leave it there and she was going to get a lecture about her attitude.

“He’s wearing his Captain’s face…” Emmy wrinkled her nose.

“Shit…”

“A word, inside now…” Steve’s voice was quiet, calm and level as he gently gripped Katie’s arm, but she recognised the icy tone it carried. Frowning slightly, she let him take her hand as he led her inside and through to the lounge. Steve shut the door behind him and Katie watched him, cocking her head to the side.

“Was there any need for that?” he said looking at her.

“For what?”

“You know damned well what.” he said, his voice still low as he raised an eyebrow “What you said to Dani, it was rude.”

“Whatever.” Katie rolled her eyes.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me…”

“Don’t speak to me like I’m one of the kids…” she shot back, her voice slightly louder.

“Well stop acting like one of them.” Steve’s hands dropped to his hips. “The dig about her husband was awful, you do realise he cheated on her right?”

Katie’s face slipped a little “No, I didn’t…but, hang on, how do you know that?”

“She told me, the other week when I dropped Aurelia off home.”

“Oh so you’re like friends now, she confiding in you?”  Katie’s tone was steely.

“No, she just mentioned that she was grateful for us having Aurelia because she’d had an appointment with the solicitor. So maybe, just maybe you should think about apologising.”

“Piss off…” Katie laughed in disbelief. “She kissed you on the cheek…”

“And?” Steve frowned “You forget that plenty of guys do that to you…”

“My or our friends, yeah. She is NOT my friend Steve…”

“Do you seriously feel that threatened by her you have to be so downright nasty?”

“I’m not threatened…look, like I said before, I told her last time she touched my stuff again and I’d snap her wrist. She got off lightly.”

Steve shook his head at his wife, he loved the bones of this woman but sometimes her behaviour drove him up the wall. She could be so petty and obtuse it was ridiculous.

Rogers by name, Stark by nature.

There was a tense silence which Katie broke.

“Are we arguing still?”

Steve sighed “I’m not arguing with you, I’m just pointing out I think you were out of line. If you don’t think you were then that’s your prerogative.” Katie hummed, before she grinned and looked at him “Wanna go fuck in the Camero like last time?”

Steve shook his head, she was unbelievable.

“No.” he said simply, turning to open the door. But Katie wasn’t giving up that easily.

“Shame, because I’m not wearing any panties.”

Ok so that got Steve’s attention. He let out an inward groan as frankly, that sex they’d had in the garage after the previous Dani incident had been hot as fuck but no, he wasn’t giving in here. What was it she always told the kids? “Actions have consequences”

Damned right they do sweetheart.

He turned back to face her, his back pressing to the door as he glanced down at his hands, the sleeves on his sweater were rolled up slightly exposing his forearms. He raised his gaze to meet that of his wife’s and damned, he nearly caved, because she really did turn him on more than she would ever know. But right now, he wasn’t giving her what she wanted.

He sighed and repeated his earlier statement to her “Such a fucking brat.” before he turned and walked out of the room.

Katie remained where she was, stunned. For the first time ever, in their 16 years of being together she had failed to seduce her man.

@the-omni-princess   @momobaby227  @geekofmanythings16  @angelofhell-666  @thewackywriter  @marvelfansworld   @cobalt-gear   @asgardlover75​   @jennmurawski13​   @jtargaryen18​  @saiyanprincessswanie​   @navispalace​  @patzammit​   @joannaliceevans-fanficblog​   @icanfeelastormbrewing​  @djeniiscorner​   @ayamenimthiriel​   @coldmuffinbanditshoe​   @disneylovingal​  @madzmilllz​  @sgtjaamesbaarnes​ @sweater-daddiesdumbdork​     @fatbottomedbarnes @official-and-unstable-satan​

[abysmalll]

Hi. I know it’s been a while. I try to stay active on here when I can, and I reblog photos I like or poetry that resonates with me, anything really, every now and then. I can’t believe I’ve had this blog since I was 14 years old. I’m turning 25 next month. It feels like I’ve lived an entire lifetime on the internet.

I’m writing this because I need to write about it. I need to accept this experience that I am having for what it is and putting words to it helps me. It helps me cope. And I don’t care if anybody reads it. Tumblr is a dead art anyway. This is me writing to the abyss of the internet, a love letter if you will, to myself, about a traumatic experience.

It has been a week since I accidentally drugged myself with 500 mg of delta 8 cannabinoid (in the form of a gummy). I bought this “sampler pack” of what I thought to be CBD gummies a couple of weekends ago while a friend was visiting from Florida. The shop did not seem sketchy, it was a legitimate dispensary, and the men behind the counter were wearing lab coats and seemed pretty knowledgeable about THC and CBD products. Originally, I bought the sampler pack thinking it was CBD isolate only. I didn’t even think the dosage was that high, maybe 25 mg tops. You know, CBD. The thing you can buy in lotions and bath bombs at those kiosks in the mall. The safe weed alternative: suitable for relaxing muscles, calming mind and body, and relieving anxiety. The sampler pack that I bought did not have many descriptions on it: just the brand and that it was a CBD + delta 8 gummy. I did not realize that delta 8 was another form of THC. I did not know that it was a synthetically / lab altered version of a part of the weed plant or anything that would cause me to get extremely high. When I saw the packaging, I just thought, cool CBD gummies. This will help me have a relaxing night, maybe a good night’s sleep. I never bought them with the intention to get fucked up. I never would have bought them if I knew what delta 8 actually was. To be fair, it was completely misrepresented to me by the men at the store I bought them from. I was under the full impression that this was a relaxing CBD gummy sampler. I did not know that, in reality, what myself and a friend were about to consume was 1000 mg of straight cannabis product (500 mg CBD + 500 mg delta 8). From all of the research I’ve done on delta 8 (now having experienced what I experienced), in reddit forums and the like, experienced users of the weed alternative say that they stay away from anything stronger than 100 mg. 100 mg is enough to fuck you up pretty heavily. To clarify, I took 1000 mg (half CBD / half delta 8). I basically had 25x the “strong” amount for experienced users. Now some people have a hard time getting high, their tolerance is pretty up there, and they need up to 400 mg to really feel it and feel it hard. To clarify again, I still had much more than 400 mg. Now to the experience:

My friend and I had just gotten back to my place after spending the day at a town festival (nothing big due to COVID, just a couple of booths set up of people selling their handmade products, animal shelters and sanctuaries giving out informational pamphlets and volunteer lists, etc.) We got lunch with a third friend after that. I was feeling totally normal. I had a beer at lunch, but pretty sober to say the least. We parted ways with our third friend and headed back to my house. I had originally given the gummies to my friend to hold on to (we would’ve taken them a few weeks prior when I originally bought them but we ended up not that specific night) and she brought them back to me so we could try together. I hesitated at first. I held the gelatinous square in my hand, thumbed it around a bit, a little anxious at the thought of “well I hope this isn’t TOO strong” and thought “what the hell”. And I ate it. She ate the other one. Little did I know how strong it would actually turn out to be. (For context: I am a very light smoker. I have a CBD pen that is 1:1 THC but is very mellow, and I smoke J’s every now and then because I don’t like the feeling of getting too high from bongs or other methods. My friend who ate the other gummy is a daily user. She smokes CBD joints and regular weed daily, eats edibles frequently, and is working on getting her medical card for anxiety).

I felt a slight giggly out-of-it-ness after 30 minutes - right away I was feeling it, feeling something. This was what I was expecting. A very mild happy vibe. This felt okay. This felt normal for what I thought I ate. This was what I had signed up for. I still felt pretty normal besides the slight buzz. Perfect. Just something to help me relax a little bit. Something to take the edge off. Akin to drinking a beer after a long day at work. I spoke in the parking lot with my friend for 45 minutes after ingestion and we both felt and seemed pretty normal. Keep in mind, edibles take time to fully kick in. In my head I completely forgot that I ate that gummy. I thought its full purpose had been fulfilled. I thought I was at the level I was supposed to be at all along. I felt fine. My friend drove home. Thank GOD she got home before it really kicked in. I would’ve felt terrible with that on my conscience if it hit her while driving.

And then I came back inside after she left. I noticed that I felt slightly more out of it, a little bit at a Dutch angle if you will. Nothing to worry about though. Just thought to myself; oh, I’m high. This was more than I was expected. But that’s okay. I told my boyfriend (with my tail between my legs: he’s not a huge fan of weed-anything but he doesn’t care that I imbibe every now and then). I told him “babe, I just thought you should know… That I ate a gummy with ___ and I’m actually feeling high right now”. And that was that. He smirked and said “okay pothead”. Went about our usual business. I smelled myself after standing outside in the heat for 45 minutes in that parking lot and thought, ugh I stink.

And then I took a shower.

I felt okay in the shower. Just normal. The hot water rolling down my body. I wasn’t having a break from reality. Not yet anyway.

And then I got out of the shower.

I wrapped my hair in a towel. I threw on an oversized t-shirt, something comfortable. The cool air after being in a hot shower wrapped around me in a ghostly hug. At this point in time, I don’t know if the drastic change in temperature triggered it. I don’t know. All I know is it had been an hour and a half since ingestion at this point and this act of getting out of the shower was the precipice for what I was about to experience. What I was about to fall into. I FaceTimed my friend to see how she was feeling. It hadn’t hit her at all yet. Okay, slight anxiety. Was I the only one feeling this? Was I feeling something I shouldn’t be? My boyfriend and I had given her a spare TV recently and I wanted to see if she was having any troubleshooting issues with it (she was hooking it up, seeing if the google chromecast still worked, etc). We spoke on FaceTime. I anxiously asked her if she was sure she wasn’t feeling anything.. I didn’t like the prospect of me being the only one feeling out of sorts. She insisted that she was feeling fine.

And then she couldn’t speak in full sentences. I thought it was me. I thought I wasn’t hearing her correctly, or processing her words in the way I should be. Anxiety. And then she said: OH. I feel it. I am high. This is not just CBD.

And then I fell.

Not physically. I didn’t physically fall down. I sat there on FaceTime with her, and I felt myself getting higher and higher, and I already had anxiety from what I thought would be a simple CBD sleepy gummy turning out to be a full on edible experience. I felt myself (my consciousness, whatever part of my personality that makes me - me) fall out of my body. I felt myself and my body disconnect. The only way I can explain it is that feeling you get when you’re falling asleep, and your mind isn’t fully asleep yet but your body is. Where you become aware of the fact that you’re falling asleep and you panic and your consciousness snaps back into your body and you jolt out of bed, alert. That feeling. That is the closest thing to what I was experiencing. Except I wasn’t sleeping. I was fully awake. I was tripping. And not only was I tripping, I was tripping BALLS.

I felt my heart lurch out of my chest. In a shaky voice I said “I have to go” and hung up. I jumped out of bed (I was FaceTiming her while laying in bed). I went to tell my boyfriend what was going on. I told him, “Hey- I’m not feeling normal. This isn’t supposed to be happening. I’m not supposed to be feeling this way right now”. I was going from anxiety mode to panic mode. I felt it happening. Except the whole time, I was high out of my mind. Completely, unexpectedly so. In complete and full honesty, I wasn’t associating this right away to the gummy. Because in my mind, I didn’t buy an edible. I bought what I thought was something else. I thought it was just a simple CBD gummy. Something to help me sleep. This couldn’t be causing me to feel this way, right? No. I have to be having a heart attack or something. Something’s wrong with my body. Something’s wrong with my brain. The two are not connecting. I’m phasing in and out. I feel my heart rate begin to rise along with my panic. I have an Apple Watch, and in a moment of clarity (and stupidity) I thought it best to put it on. I needed to check my heart rate. I fully thought I was having a heart attack and this mental detachment I was experiencing was the result of a serious bodily issue rather than the gummy I ingested two hours prior. I put the watch on. Heart rate is at 135. Okay, not terrible but not great. That’s the heart rate of a person who is jogging. That’s the heart rate of a person who is doing an exercise. I’m laying in bed. Why is my heart rate that high? Oh god. I’m feeling terrible. I’m feeling out of my body. My vision is getting darker and I feel like I’m inside my head watching everything happen on the giant movie screen that is my eyes, but I’m not outside of the screen. I’m experiencing this panic, but not in my body. I wish I could explain it better than this. I wish I could have it make sense to the average person. But the reality of it was that I was not experiencing something that you would normally experience unless you were blackout drunk, tripping balls, having a psychotic break, or drugged. Heart rate is creeping up higher and higher. I’m googling what a normal healthy heart rate is for a person of my size and weight (female, 5’2”, 110 lbs, 24 y/o). I read a sentence that says “if your blood pressure exceeds 180 or higher seek immediate medical attention”. I confused heart rate and blood pressure in the whirl of cortisol and adrenaline and fear. I check my watch again. 184 BPM.

Total. Fucking. Panic.

I felt my heart beating OUT of my chest. It felt like what I imagine holding a hummingbird feels like. It wasn’t beating, buzzing. My heart was buzzing. I thought, is this what it feels like to die? Am I going to die, right here, right now, in my bed? 24 years old? I just graduated college. I haven’t even started my first salaried job yet. I haven’t been married. I haven’t had kids. I haven’t bought my first house. I haven’t experienced so many things and I am about to die, right here, right now. My entire body was numb. Pins and needles. I thought: “I am having a heart attack. 184 BPM. My vision is going dark. I am fully going to pass out”. I yelled out for my boyfriend, at this point in the other room. He rushes in. I tell him what’s happening. He begins to panic. Not knowing how to calm me down. He tries to get me to do breathing techniques with him. It’s past the point for that. I told him, I need to go to the hospital. I need to be near a defibrillator in case that’s really what this is, a heart attack. Because I have a better chance of survival if I’m near a machine. If my heart gives out. I’m trying to communicate this as best I can, while being sky high. I can barely speak. He says, “okay we’re gonna go see ___ (our roommate, and a good friend of mine).” And he guides me downstairs. I stand up on my feet. I feel like I’m a thousand feet in the air and yet so incredibly small. We make our way downstairs to our roommates’ room. He knocks, she lets us in. I stumble in like a drowned rat, hair still wet from the shower. I must’ve looked fucking insane. She takes one look at me but I don’t see her face. I don’t process a face on her head. I just see a blur. I’m still panicking. Heart still beating like a hummingbird. I hear them talking in rushed tones but I don’t hear words. It sounds like the Peanut Gallery parents, if you’ve ever watched Charlie Brown movies. Womp womp womp womp womp.

Next thing I know, she hops out of bed and is wrapping me up in a blanket. She runs to her bathroom and grabs a pot of what smells like, lavender lotion? She’s rubbing it on my cheeks and face. I’m sobbing and all I smell is salt from my tears and lavender. She’s talking to me, but I don’t fully hear her. Like when you watch those movies of a person coming-to in the hospital and the faces of the people surrounding them in their hospital bed blur in and out, the voices fade in and out. I hear her ask me what’s going on. I tell her basically everything I wrote here, just now, but I don’t hear myself say it. The synapses in my brain aren’t firing properly. I know I’m doing things, speaking, but I can’t hear what I’m saying. I know I’m sitting here, wrapped in this blanket, but I don’t know where my body ends and the furniture begins. Cause for more anxiety. It feels like a never ending loop of fear and panic and sensory deprivation, or at least sensory overload? Who knows. My sensory experience is not of this Earth. Sitting in this space, in this room, hearing her talk to me, not really knowing what she is saying but knowing there is care behind it, gives me one small pin point of reality to hold onto. One tiny thing to save me from this seemingly endless nightmare. She takes the watch off of me. I hear her tell me I don’t need to be looking at that right now. No wonder my heart rate is through the roof. I’m giving myself a panic attack.

A panic attack. Is that what this is? Am I not having a heart attack? It sure feels like one. I guess they’re pretty similar. I was convinced, CONVINCED, I was dying. But here I was, some while later, wrapped in this burrito blanket in this room, and I was still experiencing things. Even if the experiences were warped and horrifying. It wasn’t death. But what was it then?

And then I remembered that I ate a gummy two hours earlier. I was having a drug induced panic attack. I was never expecting this. I was NEVER expecting this… What the fuck WAS this? It wasn’t normal. It was exactly what I discovered it to be later on, after researching the label of that sampler pack. It was 1000 mg of CBD and delta 8, a FDA-loophole for weed. And I was buckled in for the full fucking ride.

If you’re wondering what was going on with my friend, she was still high. She was experiencing a strong high from that gummy, but we had nowhere near similar experiences. I was on Mars. She, I think, fell asleep a little later on and woke up the next day ready to smoke again. I am amazed at how vastly different our experiences were. I would give anything to have had that kind of experience. I would’ve loved to wake up the next day, head slightly fuzzy, but feeling normal all the same, and been able to conceive of smoking weed. And if we’re being completely honest, I’m so incredibly grateful that she didn’t experience this. I would not wish this on ANY person. It was my fault that I ate that gummy, and I gave her one too. We could’ve both been fucked. At least it’s only me. My burden to carry.

But being alone in it is scary. And guess what. I woke up the next day, not feeling like myself. Not feeling normal. Not feeling present.

And I’ve woken up every day since in a completely altered state of being. I’m obviously here, I’m breathing, I’m trying to do regular tasks that I do every day. But everything feels so much harder. Everything feels fuzzy. My body feels numb. Some days are worse than others, but for the most part, nothing ever feels normal. I’m realizing that what I’m experiencing is DPDR from a drug induced panic attack. And I’ve cried every single day since that fucking day. It’s been a full week and I’m still having a break from reality. I still feel fuzzy, and like my head and my body aren’t connected, and I’m feeling depressed. I have racing thoughts. I can’t think myself out of this. I know it might seem like I’m fully lucid if I’m able to write all of this, but I’m writing this from a dreamlike state of semi-reality. I still don’t feel real, and people and places don’t feel real. Temperature changes send me into a panic. I zone out and realize that I’m not in my head and even when I “come to” I’m still not FULLY zoned in. My ears and head feel clogged, or like they’re full of cotton balls. I want so badly to escape this feeling but no matter what I do, everything feels surreal. I have no sense of time. I cannot process words. Even writing this, I guarantee you that I forgot 80% of it already. I have to reread things several times to make sure they make sense. If I’m watching a television show, I feel like I’m seeing characters talking to each other but not absorbing anything being said. How am I supposed to live like this? I’m so fucking scared. I can’t eat without feeling weird. I can’t sleep without feeling weird. I can’t do anything. I’m supposed to start my new job on Monday, and I have to be fully aware to do my training, and I’m so afraid of failing because I can barely do the bare minimum right now. I’ve considered going to the hospital but what good would that do? They would think I’m having a psychotic break and admit me to a mental hospital, where I’d be surrounded by unfamiliar people and settings, and be unable to leave. And I’d ruin my life. I’d ruin my job opportunity that I spent 6 months post-grad trying to get hired for, and I finally did. I’d ruin my ability to make an income. I’m terrified of ruining my relationships with people right now because I need so much more support from everybody than I ever do. I am so fucking terrified of my life right now because I do not feel real. I convinced myself the other night that I actually died on Saturday and I am not really experiencing any of this. I have anxiety attacks every day now. Little things set me off. I had an anxiety attack at my mom’s today and she is worried about me. Everyone is worried and nobody knows what to do, including me. I cannot live like this. It’s affecting my day to day life in such a strong sense that I can’t do minimal things. Everything frightens me. I just want to feel normal again. So badly. I would do ANYTHING to feel okay again. I just want to be me. Not this shell of a person. I feel like I fucked up my brain.

This isn’t a cry for help. I know realistically there’s nothing that anyone can do. That helplessness has set in. This is just me yelling at the void and hoping it helps me feel something better than this. I want to be real again.

[kohanayaki]

Caught in the Middle (Steve Harrington x Reader x Billy Hargrove) Ch 4

Links: Ch 1   Ch 2   Ch 3  Ch 4  Ch 5  Ch 6  Ch 7

_____________________________________________________

Ch 4 .:A Date?:.

Sunlight streamed in through your window, ribbons of light cascading across your bed sheets. You could hear the faint sound of birds chirping as the morning greeted you.

And you felt like complete and utter shit. 

You groaned, your head pounding, as you tried to block out some of the light with your pillow. You'd gotten home last night at 2:00 on the dot, feeling fine. In fact, you even caught up on some homework before you went to sleep. Now you just felt like you'd been hit by a truck.

You looked over at the time, reluctantly getting out of bed when you saw how late in the morning it was. The kids were biking over in half an hour to go to the mall and you looked like hell.

You padded down the hallway, mustering up a weak laugh when you saw your brother passed out in his room, knowing he'd probably wake up to the same fate as you. 

As you made your way downstairs the smell of breakfast food made your stomach rumble on instinct. You were 'hydrated' plenty last night, but there wasn't much actual food. Your eyes lit up as you rounded the corner and saw your dad plating up some eggs, bacon, and pancakes. He grinned as he saw you, setting the plate down on the table in front of you. 

“And how is my daughter doing this fine morning?” he asked, already knowing the answer.

“Swell,” you said sarcastically.

He laughed, walking over to the cabinet to get you some Tylenol and a glass of water. 

“Trust me, I know the feeling,” he said, “I can't really say anything on this one, I'd be lying if I said I haven't done worse when I was your age. That hangover is punishment enough. Just drink water throughout the day, and go on and eat something greasy while you're at the mall too. But get your blood sugar up right now, I don't want you back in that car until your head's clear, you understand?”

“Will do,” you said, already stuffing your face, “Thanks, dad.”

“You're welcome,” he smiled, “Love you, drive safe.”

“Love you too,” you said through a mouthful of bacon. 

As he retreated back into his office you savored the taste of the feast he made for you. You smiled fondly as you did. Your dad didn't really cook until he became a single parent. When he took on the full responsibility of raising you and your brother, he tried his best to fill your mom's role, following the old recipe books she'd left behind. His first attempts were a general health hazard, but as time went on he actually turned out to be a great cook.

The sudden ringing of bicycle bells outside your house made you scarf down the rest of your plate, snatching your car keys off the table. 

You opened the front door to see the whole gang waiting for you.

“I swear, the only time you guys are on time for anything is when you're leeching off of me,” you said, unlocking the car and leaving them to figure out the seating.

“You know us so well,” Dustin said, hopping into the shotgun seat before anyone else could take it. 

“I forgot to ask earlier, but how was that summer camp you went to, Dustin?” you asked, turning on the engine.

“It was so cool,” he beamed, “Our counselor taught us how to make all kinds of inventions. I made a self-nailing hammer, a wind powered clock, and a radio tower so I can talk to my girlfriend whenever I want since her parents monitor her phone calls.”

“Girlfriend?” you turned to look at him. He smiled back at you, bright as anything.

“Yeah, we were surprised too,” Max said from the back.

“Although we're not sure she actually exists,” Mike chimed in, “Apparently she's as hot as Phoebe Cates.”

“Hotter than Phoebe Cates,” Dustin corrected, “And she's a genius too.”

“Riiight,” Lucas said. 

“Well I think she sounds great, Dusty,” you said, “It's pretty romantic you built that radio tower just to talk to her.”

“It's the strongest communications network in Hawkins across 150 channels,” he said proudly.

“Well, that's certainly impressive,” you grinned, ruffling his hair. 

Soon you pulled up to one of the many entrances to the mall, stopping at the curb. 

“Well, this is your stop, guys,” you said, “What are you gonna see?”

“The Stuff,” Mike said excitedly. 

“Isn't that rated R?” you questioned, a brow raised. 

All of them looked at each other, slightly panicked.

“Well, we'll see you later, (Y/n)!” Lucas said, flinging open the back door and getting out as fast as he could. Everyone else quickly fled after him, running towards the theater. You shook your head. They got themselves into a lot of shenanigans, but admittedly you were the one instigating it most of the time when you were younger, even if you were the babysitter. 

However, as soon as the kids left for the movie you were painfully reminded of the throbbing headache you had. You groaned as one of the strobe lights around the movie theater glared in your face, not helping matters in the slightest. 

You knew eating a bunch of greasy food technically didn't do anything for a hangover, but it sure made you feel a hell of a lot better emotionally. With that in mind you decided to walk over to the Burger Chef located inside the mall for a little pick me up. 

Luckily for you there wasn't much of a line. Only a few people were scattered around the seating area at the food court. You were looking over the menu hanging on the wall when a familiar voice broke your train of thought.

“(Y/n)?”

You looked around at the sound of your name to see Steve looking back at you, just as surprised. 

“Hey,” you said. You took a moment to look over him. He looked just as awful as you did, if you were honest. The deep-set bags under his tired eyes aged him an eternity, and he looked a bit green as well. 

“You too, huh?” You bit back a grin as you gave him a short laugh through your nose.

“Yeah,” he admitted, “In hind sight I probably shouldn't have mixed liquors, but hey, there's nothing I can do about it now. Figured some fries might help.”

“They always do,” you said, “What are you doing here, anyways? Aren't you on your shift at Scoops?” You noticed he was still in his work uniform.

“Lunch break,” he explained, “I don't really have long, but we can grab a table if you want.”

“I'd like that,” you smiled.

Steve was a little surprised at his own forwardness. Apparently he was hungover enough to not overthink everything that came out of his mouth. However he was even even more surprised at you agreeing to sit down with him. He didn't know why his brain was making such a big deal out of this; you ate lunch with him every day and hung out together all the time, but then again that was also including a group of other people. You and Steve had never really spent time together when it was just the two of you, except for when you iced his busted face after the basketball stunt, which hardly counted as a first date. 

He felt uncharacteristically nervous as he slid into the booth next to you. A year ago he would have been pulling out all the stops to make you his, but now he just wasn't so sure anymore. He was never afraid of rejection before, but when he thought of you as the one rejecting him he figured it would be better to not say anything at all. 

'Get yourself together,' Steve thought to himself, 'It's just lunch with a friend. Friends do that!'

“Penny for your thoughts, Popeye?” you said, flicking the fabric of his sailor hat. 

“Huh?” Steve said, snapping out of it, “Oh, nothing, just, uh. . .” he quickly picked up a menu, hoping to cover the majority of his reddening face with it, “Looking at the XXL Supreme. 2Lb beef patty with bbq sauce, ranch, fried pickles, beer cheese and. . . yeah, that sounds pretty gross.”

“I'll probably stick to a regular burger,” you laughed, glancing at the menu over his shoulder. 

You were so close he could feel the heat coming off your body and smell the sweet scent of your perfume. He scolded himself for being so weak, forcing himself to concentrate only on the food. 

Right at that moment a waiter strolled up to you, writing pad in hand. 

“Hi. Welcome to Burger Chef,” he said, sounding just as dead inside as he looked, “How may I serve you today?”

“A double patty melt with cheddar,” Steve said, “And a coke, please.”

“I'm trying to decide between-” you stopped yourself as you looked up, staring at the waiter. You thought he looked familiar and it was then that you realized he was one of the guys that bullied your brother in middle school. Your eyes narrowed as you recalled how he and his friends cut the strings on Kyle's guitar when he brought it to school one day. 

You saw a flash of recognition in his eyes and your lips curved upwards.

“The classic burger, simple,” you said, the fakest smile you could muster on your face, “But on a sesame bun instead of the brioche, no mayo, extra mustard, add caramelized onions and extra cheese, and don't forget the pickles. If you could add shredded lettuce instead of the whole leaf that'd be great. Oh, and a Neapolitan shake with chocolate syrup and no whipped cream.”

“We don't have a Neapolitan shake,” he said irritably and slightly panicked, trying to write everything down. 

“Well I heard in your commercial if you just ask, an employee would be happy to mix any of the milkshake flavors together,” you said, your smirk widening. What could you say? Being a bitch was fun sometimes- especially when the person on the receiving end was a total dickhead. 

“Coming right up,” the waiter said through his teeth.

Steve looked between the two of you before the waiter stormed off to the kitchen window, slamming his hand down on the bell with more force than necessary.

“So, what'd he do?” Steve chuckled.

“Bullied my brother really bad in school,” you said, “What goes around comes around, though. In a few years Kyle will be off to LA to start touring with his band and this guy will still be here covered in fry grease wearing a burger shaped hat.”

“Well I hope that's not my fate,” Steve said, only half joking as he took his uniform hat off, twirling it in his hands. 

You could tell even though he tried to hide behind the humor it was something he really was concerned about. 

“Hey, don't worry about it,” you said, nudging his shoulder lightly, “You're not an asshole. . . anymore.”

You managed to get a laugh out of him at the end and you smiled, glad you were at least able to cheer him up some.

“Seriously, though, it's fine to not know what you want to do with your life yet,” you said, “Hell, I know grown ass men who still don't know what they're doing. You don't have to go to some fancy college to do something great.”

Steve looked at you, thinking over your words. He thought it was crazy how you were his age but you were so much more mature and optimistic than he was. The way you thought was unlike anyone he's met before in Hawkins, and it only further intensified his wanting to get to know you.

“Thanks, (Y/n),” he smiled.

Meanwhile, your little crew of gremlins had finished their film, now making their way to the food court for lunch.

“What do you think The Stuff tastes like?” Lucas asked to no one in particular.

“I bet it's like Betty Crocker frosting,” Dustin said dreamily.   

“Um can we not talk about how sentient parasitic goo tastes? Because we're literally about to go eat,” Max said.

Suddenly Dustin stopped in his tracks, making Will run into his back. 

“Dustin, what the hell?” Mike said, screeching to a halt before he could collide with Will. 

“No way,” Dustin said, staring far off some place the others couldn't see.

“What's wrong?” El asked, confused. 

Dustin pulled his friends behind the shrubbery next to the fountain, ducking in the cover as he peeked his head out slightly. 

“They're on a date!” Dustin said, a little too loudly. He ignored the stares he got from passersby as he continued to watch you and Steve laugh over your burgers in your shared booth.

“(Y/n) and Steve?” Mike said, “I thought he was still hung up over Nancy breaking up with him.”

“Well clearly the man's moved on,” Lucas said.

Max rolled her eyes, hitting him on the arm.

“Ow!” Lucas exclaimed, turning to her, “What was that for?”

“Just because a guy and a girl are hanging out doesn't mean it's a 'date',” she pointed out, “Maybe they're just good friends. I've seen them around each other a lot at school.”

“I think he finally worked up the courage to ask her out for real,” Dustin started theorizing, ignoring Max completely. 

“What do you mean for real?” Will asked.

“It's so obvious he's into her but he's scared of striking out,” Dustin said, “That whole Nancy situation really struck a blow to his self confidence.”

Mike tried to get a better look at what you two were doing, leaning over El's shoulder and squinting at the burger place. Suddenly his footing slipped from under him as he accidentally took a step on the wet tile near the fountain and fell on his ass into a bush. 

“Shit!”

You and Steve stopped eating your burgers and turned around at the sudden noise, but saw nothing but a ruffle in the plants nearby. 

“That was weird,” you said, looking around. 

“Yeah,” Steve said, “Well, it's bear season, you never know when they'll sneak up on you.”

You laughed at that, the sound making Steve's heart flutter. He loved your laugh, even more so when he knew he was the cause of it. 

Suddenly Steve remembered his shift was probably starting, his lunch break was less than an hour long.

“Shit, I should've been back ten minutes ago,” Steve said, looking down at his watch, “My shift already started.”

“Oh, sorry,” you said, “I didn't mean for this to go on for so long.”

Steve looked surprised, shaking his head vigorously. 

“No, no, I liked it,” he said, not fully registering how the sentence sounded out loud until your cheeks flushed.

“I-I mean-”

“I get it,” you laughed softly, “I liked it too.”

Steve felt like his heart was just shot through with cupid's arrow as you smiled up at him and offered to walk him back to Scoops. He hadn't felt this way since Nancy. After she broke his heart he was convinced he would never get over her, but now you were here, occupying all the free space in his mind despite only knowing you for a short while. What the hell was going on with him?

His mental debate came to an unceremonious stop when he realized you were already in front of the ice cream shop.

Steve turned to you and did his best to sound indifferent. He had a really good time, but he didn't know if you felt the same way.

“Well, I better get back to it,” he said, clearing his throat awkwardly, “You know, suit up, sling ice cream, appease the masses-”

“We should do this again sometime,” you said, effectively flipping the 'off' switch on his rambling. 

Steve seemed to freeze in this plane of existence, staring at you with wide eyes.

“Yeah! I mean, that's what I was gonna ask you, but I didn't know if you wanted to, and. . .” he trailed off, kicking himself again.   

'When you talk you just make it worse,' he mentally scolded himself.

You laughed a bit at his flushed face.

'Adorable,' you thought. For being the former king of Hawkins High, he was still a giant dork.

“Well I'll definitely see you around this time, then,” you smiled, reminded of your first day back. Things were different between you two now, but that wasn't a bad thing at all.

You walked out of Scoops Ahoy feeling lighter, a smile on your face and your headache long forgotten. With your disastrous dating history, maybe Steve Harrington was the kind of guy who could be good for you right now.

The very thought made you feel giddy inside, but as you said yourself before, life had a funny way of changing your plans completely.

Read Chapter 5 here!

Taglist: @in-my-dreams-2000 @ggclarissa @iris1697 @5sosxgrethan @ohnoniella @sarcasticalphaofthelooserspack @aspiring-fangirls-world @wow-im-so-tired @hopesxxhigh @justanothercrazyassfangirl @too-many-lanes @whimsylavender @bish-ima-clown @amarachoren @mosiacbrokenheartstf @mcuvlxgs @xapham @metuel18 @immirandaq @nellaphine @multi-madison @gingertalksshit @jojo-buttercup @kyberhearts @mvdelaine @minnie-marvel @caitlin-rose28 @zandaleekrz @r3inventedd @void-fire-rose @macymafia @wanna-be-idle @newtsshelbys @kimmydespell @weyheyokay @r4ttusr4ttus @cynthianokamaria

[the-woman-in-the-writing]

“When the Moon Walked Among Us” a short fiction

Rating: PG Word Count: 3,164

Author’s note: I’ve always been good at remembering my dreams, and that seemed like a useless talent until I dreamed the world ended. I wrote this story as a way of preserving how vivid and realistic (yet a bit weird) my dream was, though please take note that I am not the narrator (in my stories, the narrator is never me). I didn’t revise, add, or deleted any scene or part in this dream-story. Everything you’re about to read was purely dreamed by yours truly. 

 Maybe it was the end of the world. Maybe it wasn’t. They never knew for sure what it was and why it happened. Only one thing was clear: nothing was ever the same again. Not after everything…

No.

 I.

People came together all over the world to watch the Super Moon. They packed their tents and barbecues, set up camp in wherever there was a clear field and open sky, turned off their lights, and waited. Families, friends, lovers, and strangers. We all came to watch the Super Moon that was said to last for a whole day. People chatted with one another, talking about their families or whoever they came with, over burgers and beer. The children made new friends and played by the sunset with their flashlights and food wrapper paper planes.

Everyone waited for the Super Moon.

They said it will be the most beautiful thing you’ll ever see. And it was. Despite everything that happened after, it really was.

When the evening came and everyone had piled up beside their tents and prepared their telescopes or binoculars, the Super Moon came into view: beautiful, big, round, and luminous, tinged and glowing with a creamy orange light that everyone marveled at. We were wolves staring at the moon, waiting to be transformed into something greater and stronger. It was so close that you could almost see every spot and crater in great detail even without a telescope or binoculars.

Then we went home, talked about it on the drive, posted pictures of it on the internet with stupid captions and hashtags, and showed it on the news. But as the world spun around this captivating piece of heaven, we all took turns, the people of the world. Of viewing. Of taking photos. Of making art. Of writing poetry. At one point you could say everyone was looking at the same thing as you could never miss it, this beautiful thing.

Later, people will believe that the Super Moon brought the world together for one tiny yet impactful moment in history. Not everyone will think so, but most will.

But we would all agree that this was the beginning.

“I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.” - Romans 8:18

 II.

No one could sleep.

When it started, no one knew why. Everyone in the world shifted in their beds and wondered why it was 2am and they couldn’t sleep. Though we all woke up on time, in sync with our 7am alarm, the atmosphere felt like noon: hot and awake. At work or at school we all exchanged, I couldn’t sleep last night’s and me too’s, and two hours after we all ate our lunches the sun was already setting. We were all confused. That night, no one got a good night’s sleep.

We asked the scientists, but some of them kept silent. Some of them said it was normal. We didn’t know what to think; we just wanted to sleep.

After a while, people started getting sick or getting into accidents. Most of us developed insomnia and loss of appetite. Those who started falling asleep again began while they were driving on their way to work. By the end of the month, most of the headlines yelled CRASH, DEAD, and INJURED. Children cried out of fear, wondering why they couldn’t avoid the darkness of the night by sleeping. Their parents grumbled, tired and sleepless as well.

Our days shortened. Life felt fast with our 16-hour days, but we’re humans. Of course, we found a way to adjust to it eventually. We stayed up all night partying, reading, drinking, texting, praying, and wandering; we opened and closed our stores much later; we extended our Late, Late Shows; and we made clocks that had shorter hours.

That didn’t mean we slept well and regularly again. Sometimes we would still shift in our beds and turn our pillows over and under our heads. The digits of 8 midnight would seem to blink endlessly by our bedside table. And if sleep was hopeless, we all stared at the moon, which was closer than it was three months ago.

“Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed…” - 1 Corinthians 15:51

 III.

It was all over the news: a lion with a school of dead fish washed up ashore on a beach in India. No one knew where the lion came from or how it made it all the way there, but people were speculating it had something to do with the moon and how it traveled a hundred thousand kilometers closer to us in just five months.

Again, we asked the scientists. And again, they either kept silent or said it was normal.

It’s part of the earth’s natural process.

It was bound to happen sooner or later.

It’s nothing to worry about.

From 384, 400 kilometers to 274, 575, we knew that was something to worry about, but we didn’t know everything. The how’s and the why’s. So, we relied on the scientists, because in science we trust and in God we doubt.

No one lived by the beaches anymore, even fishermen. By day, beaches would get so dry that you could walk for three hours and see nothing but land still. You’d step on a dead baby crab once in a while and by the time you’re looking back to where you came from, your legs would be gift-wrapped with seaweed and glittered with sand. At first, we couldn’t figure out the best way to fish and go on cruises because by night the water would get so high that it would swallow up any structure within fifty kilometers. In Ireland they say you’d be able to climb half of a sea cliff during the night.

After a while, the ecosystem went crazy and we went hungry. Partly because we’d just been adjusting to the 16-hour days, but mainly because the animals had a harder time getting used to it. Most of the fishes we caught were dead, and no one dared to fish in the middle of the night as weather became more unpredictable. Crops were no exception. Half of them died along with the marine life.

But then again, we were humans. We found a way to survive.

Almost everything we ate were manufactured in a shape of a cylinder or cube. We wrote recipe books that said, “101 Ways to Cook Canned Food” or “Canned You Cook This?” And we hid almost every vegetable we had left in fear of someone stealing it. Then by moonlight, if we felt having something that reminded us of how the world used to be, we would eat our roasted genetically modified chickens and our children would say, “Daddy, daddy, the moon is the size of my fist!”

“But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty.” - 2 Timothy 3:1

 IV.

Our days shortened to 14 hours and depending on which part of the world you lived in, you either bathed in the sun or crept in the dark for more than half a day. The lands were cracked eggshells in Southern Asia and Africa, just like their skin. News reporters, missionaries, and tourists who travelled from the cold, dark North cried at swimming pools and parks because they missed the heat, and sometimes children would mistake them for ghosts or banshees.

Earth’s tilt was at 45-degrees and up in the North, where it almost snowed all year-round with only a month to melt almost half of the ice. People who didn’t die to lack of sleep or hunger died in the cold; in the South, they dried up like beef jerky. And before even Christmas arrived there were already no feeding programs or charity cases anymore, because all the beggars were dead and buried under our snow.

One time, a friend said, “My daughter came home from school and gave me her drawing. Their teacher had asked them to draw and color different kinds of people from all over the world and you know what? Even the Asian is black now!” We laughed for a second or so, but we stopped for a lot of reasons. 

“You know, you could draw the moon and the sky and still use the same crayons.”

He replied, “The moon will take half of the paper though”

“And if those days had not been cut short, no human being would be saved. But for the sake of the elect those days will be cut short.” - Mark 13:20

 V.

Big, bold letters sprawled across every outlet store, every shopping center, and every thrift shop, and they all spelled the same thing: WINTER CLOTHES FOR SALE. We scavenged the last of our animals that could provide us warmth and security because nothing says, “We will survive this deadly winter” like wool jackets made from our frozen sheep and a pair of leather gloves, freshly skinned from our endangered cows.

Then the world figured out how to get what it wants. The North began to ask the South for animals: chickens, pigs, cows – every farm animal you can find in a children’s story book. Because no animal we could eat could survive the winter that long and we don’t know where the fishes went. On the other hand, the South asked for vegetables and lots of ice. And finally, we were able to travel conveniently again when we’ve figured out where to put all the ice, and the people of the South were happy as long as they got fresh vegetables on their plates and ice to keep them hydrated and cool. It didn’t matter that their forests and crops burned up and that their rivers were nothing but empty veins, because it was enough that they ate and drank.

It wasn’t easy, of course. We all complained. We all asked the scientists.

“How do we survive?”

We no longer asked if we were going to be okay or if they were lying about half of the world being frozen and the other half burning as something normal, and that we will be finishing the year earlier than expected. The scientists said there was nothing to worry about. We had to take their word for it, because what could we do if even they can’t do something about it?

So, no one just talked about the moon that watched over us, except maybe for the Internet that made jokes and funny pictures about it.

What’s important was that we made it out of this alive.

So, our scientists – all kinds – genetically modified our animals and manipulated our crops; they reproduced fishes in their laboratories; they made special facilities for storing water; they invented brand new foods with whatever was left to help get us all the nutrients we need; and they gave us technology and guides to help us do all of this at home.

If the sky was clear, we would find ourselves looking at the moon and its craters and spots, with our faces painted with moonlight. We were still wolves waiting to be transformed into something greater and stronger. Something that could survive all this.

We prayed.

Even though in science we trust and in God we doubt.

“Pray that it may not happen in winter. For in those days there will be such tribulations as has not been from the beginning of the creation that God created until now, and never will be.” - Mark 13:19

 VI.

What follows is a series of tragedies: tragedies we know of; tragedies we named; tragedies that weren’t 14-hour days, mass animal endangerment, world famine, or a half-frozen, half melting world – tragedies that we were used to.

Earthquakes and the tsunamis that followed sunk islands as we welcomed a new year. All the small countries that lived on islands no longer resurfaced; their people would’ve been declared extinct if it weren’t for migration. If somebody were to make a world map at that time, you’ll no longer find Singapore, Malaysia, Brunei, Fiji, Cuba, or any of the islands as small as them on the map. Half of Japan and Indonesia sunk, and only a quarter of the Philippines resurfaced.

We lost seven percent of the world population. That’s half a billion people crushed by debris and drowned with the resources they traded all over the world. All their memories of their childhoods, first loves, and heartbreaks were reduced to nothing but rocks in the ocean to be covered by algae or barnacles. They were Atlantis, and a story come true have never felt so tragic.

People were devastated, of course. But we were all very hungry too. Those who weren’t affected by the earthquakes refused to help. There were incoming hurricanes and we all thought,

The dead will remain dead.

Half a billion people don’t need food, shelter, or medicine anymore.

There was no use in sharing resources with the few hundreds of survivors when more than a billion need it to stay alive.

Some people thought it was cruel and selfish, but by then we weren’t humans anymore. We were savages scraping what was left of the world we destroyed. And as much as we hate to eat and drink what should’ve been shared to the survivors of the Great Sink, we still did. We were all so hungry. God, we were hungry.

Then the hurricanes came along with their floods, landslides, and tornadoes, and they killed us and our animals. Homes were destroyed. Families were separated. Children were orphaned. There were about five billion people left in the world.

This must be a bad dream, we thought.

A sick joke.

That’s what this is.

“There will be great earthquakes, and in various places famines and pestilences. And there will be terrors and great signs from heaven.” - Luke 21:11

 VII.

People found evidence of advanced technology being developed and used by scientists, the same ones who told us that the world was not ending. (Or so we believed.)

There was a mass production of high-tech projectors and weather instruments that were launched into space to control what we saw on the horizon and what we didn’t. (Or so they say.)

The media was accused and persecuted for false news and being paid of hush-money to keep the so-called truth a secret. (Or so we wanted.)

Hundreds of data was discovered to contain information about a world-wide human experiment determining the effects of a global catastrophe and series of disasters on human behavior. (Or so they say.)

We imprisoned CEOs, scientists, and news reporters. We raided their homes, stole their food and clothes, and hurt their loved ones. We killed them in our dreams every night and ripped them limb by limb in the sleepless ones as we lay on the floors of our wrecked home, covered in snow or in sweat, and still staring at the moon that isn’t back to its rightful, safe distance. (And so we did.)

Everything will be back to normal once we shut down all those projectors and controllers. We will learn to live again and be humans.

And the world was not ending after all.

(And that’s what we wanted to believe.)

“And then many will fall away and betray one another and hate one another. And many false prophets will arise and lead many astray. And because lawlessness will be increased, the love of many will grow cold.” - Matthew 24:10-12

 VIII.

People came together all over the world to watch the world end. They held their children or whoever they had left, gathered food and shared them with others as a last act of kindness, set up camp in wherever there was a field with no debris or remnant of a human being, and waited. Families, friends, lovers, and strangers. We all came to witness The Day that was said to last a lifetime. People chatted with one another, talking about their families or whoever they lost, over empty stomachs and chapped lips. The children stayed with the adults and clung onto them with unending fear and the memory of a lost childhood.

Everyone waited for The Day.

They said it will be the most dreadful thing you’ll ever see. And it was. Despite everything that happened before, it really was.

When the hour came and everyone had piled up beside the broken homes or fallen trees, the moon stared right us as always: terrifying, big, round, luminous, and waiting to collide with our fallen earth. We were wolves staring at the moon, waiting to be transformed into something greater and stronger. It was so close that you could almost see every calamity and loss you’ve endured the past year in great detail even without a telescope, binoculars, or a washed-up family album or baby shoes.

We stayed and faced our inevitable fate. Some still managed to post pictures of it on the internet with stupid captions and hashtags. There were even people who showed it on the news. But as the world spun around this frightening piece of heaven, we all took turns, the people of the world. Of viewing. Of taking photos. Of crying. Of hugging and kissing one last time. Everyone was living the Day as you could never miss it, even if you wanted to.

And we all believed that the moon will crash into us and wipe us out for old times’ sake, but it wasn’t much later that we heard the most chilling, bone shattering sound we ever got to hear: the sound of the moon cracking, like a breaking iceberg, echoing into our souls, and resonating as weeping and almost hushed screams.

Some people swore they saw Christ come out of the moon, accompanied by angels. Not everyone believes so.

But we all agreed that when we saw pieces of the moon falling down on us in slow motion, helpless and blazing, that it was disturbingly beautiful.

It was then that I kissed my wife for the last time.

“But in those days, after that tribulation, the sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give its light, and the stars will be falling from heaven; and the powers of heaven will be shaken.” - Mark 13:24-25

E P I L O G U E

There were survivors and they were less than a hundred. They spent the last days on earth, freezing, weeping, and gnashing their teeth in the dark. The sun died. The moon is gone. There is only but loneliness living and walking among the few humans who had gathered up the will to keep on breathing.

They couldn’t accept that that was the end of the world. If it was, there shouldn’t have been anyone left. But there was, and it was them.

Soon, they realized there was nothing left to do but wait.