#i just answered this instead of your first ask bc it still mentions the song and also has everything else you wanted to say | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lovscb97 · 17 days ago

Text

railway (b.cc.) ༉‧₊˚.

╰┈➤ˎˊ˗ TRACK 001: part of the step out series

synopsis: you didn’t mean to get tied up with your best friend’s ex-boyfriend, but sometimes all you can do is hold on tight for the rough ride ahead of you, even if it means going against all the pre-written rules of friendship.

tags: best friend's ex!bangchan x fem!reader, angst, forbidden romance, mutually toxic relationship, morally grey characters, chan and reader are both kind of awful, mention of other idols (rest of stray kids, stayc, enhypen, etc), oc as chan's ex-girlfriend (aeri), mentions of alcohol and drinking, kissing, use of nicknames (baby, darling, etc), very brief pussy slapping, possessiveness, mild dacryphilia, car sex, fingering, sir kink, squirting, jealousy, slight exhibitionism, bathroom sex, unprotected sex, rough sex, degradation (bitch, slut, etc), dirty talk, very brief mention of strength kink, mirror sex, breeding kink, creampie, brief choking, slight overstimulation, etc

theme board: www.pin.1003 / song link: prod:b.cc

wc: 7.85k

add. notes: welcome 2 the first course >:] i've offered my insights n analysis on railway alr but delving into the meaning of the song n creating a whole fic based off of it was very intriguing for me esp cus i don't usually write based off of music i listen to. i knew i wanted smth wrong to put out but i don't like infidelity n the usual story on toxic situations is tough to pull of so i decided to go down the more 'scandalous' route of sorts n make chan ur best friend's ex instead :3 there's a pinterest board i made for all these fics which for this one u can find linked above to grasp the aesthetics of it n i'd recommend reading this while listening to railway ofc. as always plz make sure u watch out for the tags n dni if ur a minor. also sidenote but aeri (the oc) is not meant to be seen as giselle from aespa but rather i just used that name bcs it's pretty lol just thought i'd lyk that. either way i hope u all enjoy!

. . .

19:23 PM from: dni!!! Wyd?

you swallow thickly at the sight of the text which lights up your screen, eyes zeroed in on the simple three letters which still hold thousands of words worth of meaning in themselves when combined. if it weren’t for the rubber case at the back, you reckon you would’ve dropped your phone with how instantly sweaty your palms become upon having received the message. the way you’re staring at your app, maybe even enough to bore holes into the words displayed back at you, doesn't go unnoticed either, and you barely manage to pocket the device as quick as you'd pulled it out just in time as your best friend approaches you.

“everything okay? you look kinda pale.” aeri frowns once she’s in front of you, voice laced with concern so sweet that it almost makes bile rise up your throat as you attempt to lean back against jake’s kitchen counter to stabilise yourself. she doesn’t seem to buy the eventual shaky nodding of your head that you offer after realising she’d just asked you something that required an answer, but even if she wants to probe you further, she doesn’t, deciding to immerse you in conversation about something your other friends had told her; another one of her gossip sessions with yoon and jungwon, you presume.

her storytelling fades into background noise at some point, for you can’t ignore the heavy weight of the object tucked away in the back of your jeans, still incessantly burning and buzzing with notifications you know you shouldn’t pay half a mind to. you’re well aware that they’re all most likely from the same person; the one individual you shouldn’t and have no right to indulge and mix with to this day; whose bedsheets you’ve found yourself tangled up in late at night alongside dirty noises slipping past both your lips; the very man who remains as sin personified in the storyline of your current life, and honestly might stay that way for as long as you live.

or in other words, aeri’s ex-boyfriend, chan.

your best friend met chan in her final year of university, bumping into him on chance encounter outside her lecture hall and exchanging textbooks by accident. chan had been all smiles when she’d invited him to lunch as an apology for the mix up, often tagging along with her after that until soon enough, they grew close enough and began seeing each other romantically. he seemed to treat her well for the most part, and you were happy for aeri that she’d found a good man worth her time and effort in the world. she’d drag you with her on their outings one too many times, and you’d gotten to know him from those instances, finding him to be a decent match for her.

unfortunately, all good things come to an end, and the spark between them started dwindling. you’re not sure what exactly happened, only able to recall bits and pieces from what aeri had told you mid-sob on your calls about her previous lover slowly becoming distant nearing the final stages of their relationship, so you’ve always just thought it was a mutual decision to cut ties for the betterment of each other. according to her vividly detailed breakdowns though, chan had been the one to suggest calling it off first, and everything came to a screeching halt three years down the line with much screaming and tears from her side. to an extent, their split did shake up things a little between all your mutual friends, but it also didn’t fully stop everybody from engaging with each other. all this brings you to your current situation— waiting in jake’s apartment for the rest of your friends to arrive for a random party he’d decided to plan on a whim.

“yo, guys!” speak of the devil, you think, tugging yourself out of your thoughts as you turn your body to let jake’s figure come into view. he beams at you like a big puppy, his hair flopping in a way that loosely resembles dog ears, and you remember after a split second that that’s just how your friend is referred to as in your group; the resident golden retriever. he parades up to you and aeri as one too, his vibrant smile lighting up the atmosphere in a way that you can’t stop relief from flooding your system at his presence.

“how are my favourite girls doing this fine evening?” he smirks, his usual flirting the same as always, causing aeri to roll her eyes as you chuckle. “har har up yours, sim.” she sticks her tongue out, prompting jake to do the same as he ruffles her hair, to which she shrieks. “oh, by the way,” jake perks up as if he’s just thought of something, completely ignoring your best friend smacking him on the arm lightly over his actions. “y/n, would you be so kind as to get the pack of beer from my car?” he pleads, doe eyes twinkling under the light of the room.

you’re about to groan in protest, not wanting to go back out in the cold and freeze your ass off for a measly few cans of alcohol, but the front door swinging open accompanied by the all too familiar voice you’ve grown acquainted to fills the air, making your stomach drop— chan. chan is here. suddenly, you’re not too opposed to getting far away, and you quickly nod your head rapidly in agreement, not bothering to wait for the way jake lights up at you accepting his proposal before snatching the keys from his hold and darting towards the lift.

chan’s jaw tightens at this. he barely manages to catch a glimpse of you from how you rush out past him, not even able to take in your outfit or face in the dashing haze you leave in. he points his thumb to where you had exited, bluffing something about helping you when jake responds how you’d gone out to grab the load of drinks he’d been too lazy to heave upstairs himself. nobody makes any work to question him when he turns on his heel to catch the elevator himself, thinking nothing of his usual gentleman-like behaviour.

nobody except for a pair of eyes lingering on his disappearing frame that neither one of the visitors in the house manages to grasp onto.

meanwhile, you quickly find yourself in the outdoor parking lot of jake’s building, hugging your shivering body tightly in an effort to warm yourself up against the chilling wind that blows past the trees. the sky has basically turned dark by now, but the streetlamps hanging overhead on the sides of the pavement serve as enough illumination to carry out your task. your breath comes out in heavy smoke to the point you can see it, and you try your best to spot your friend’s car as soon as possible, cheering internally when you manage to do so. after having jogged on over to it, you enter the key into the trunk lock with trembling fingers, twisting it until that same latch you’ve grown used to feeling with your own vehicle opens and makes way for you to push up the boot lid.

you’re about to hook underneath to manoeuvre it open, that is, until a sudden cold hand tugs on the bare skin of your arm, making you jump out of your own flesh. you open your mouth to yell out loud, ready to alert your friends a few floors upstairs that someone is trying to kidnap you potentially when that same hand clamps over it. only when your vision stabilises in your dimly lit surroundings do you recognise chan in front of you, and you feel your shoulders physically drop as you put down your defences, glaring at him when he removes himself.

“why the hell would you sneak up on me like that? i—“

“are you avoiding me?”

his question comes out gruff and annoyed, causing you to blink at the way he’s glowering at you in suspicion. his arms are crossed against his chest, hiding the black button-up you’ve seen him wearing and committed to memory one too many times from how it clings perfectly onto his chiselled shoulders and biceps. it makes you gulp, but you attempt to hide your affected reaction anyways, delivering a scoff in his direction which only makes chan grit his teeth at your attitude. “so what if i am? you know damn well either way without needing me to spell it out for you.” you bite back, moving to turn around when he catches you by the elbow, leaving you to scowl at him.

“what’s gotten into you? just a few days ago, we were fine, yet now you’re ignoring my texts?” he narrows his eyes, holding you in place so you can’t budge away from him. you let out a faint tch at his words, more so at your own susceptibility to succumb to his advances, but chan tongues the side of his cheek after assuming you’re just being blatantly disrespectful towards him. his voice drops to a lower, seductive tone as he speaks up again. “need me to remind you again? you came over last saturday and humped my thigh before squirting on my tong— hmph!“

“god, yes, i fucking remember, okay?” you exclaim in a whisper after having slapped a hand over his mouth this time, eyes darting around frantically to make sure no one heard that. “could you be any more louder? jesus christ.” chan peels you off of him shortly afterwards, his expression souring at the way you address him. something about the anger in his features makes your own rise, and you feel any or all remorse you'd experienced prior to seeing him in person today vanish, replaced with a bubbling hatred of sorts.

you and chan began your weird affiliation with one another around two months ago, exactly a few days after he and your best friend broke up. to this day, you don’t know why he made a move on you, much less why you yourself reciprocated it. sure, you’d always found him objectively attractive when he and aeri were together, and while he may be your exact match of an ideal type to a tee, you would never think to act on the growing tension you experienced for him, especially when he was in a long term commitment with the closest person in the world to you.

it all happened in the most random of occurrences too. you still remember meeting him the night you were out at the convenience store to run errands, catching him hunched over a table in a hoodie and messy hair with two bottles of soju in front. he’d flashed you a polite smile and offered to drink together, which realistically, you should’ve declined. you should’ve turned the other way in disgust and walked out on him to tell your best friend what he’d attempted to do, regardless of whether that would’ve led to something or not. instead, you found yourself in his bed that day, moaning his name as he ravished you under the moonlight streaming through his curtains in your combined drunken craze.

the next morning had been full of hiccuped cries, chan cradling you in his arms despite the scalding touch of his hold gnashing against you and leaving metaphorical imprints that you would never be able to scrub off. each time he soothed you, rubbing your back and kissing your hair, you felt the waves of guilt wash over harsher than the last. he continued to reassure you throughout anyways, telling you it’d be okay and that no one would have to know. blindly, you’d believed him, promising yourself and him to never act on either of your arbitrary lust by not letting go of your inhibitions.

that was the first lie you told yourself.

“y’know, i’m really not a fan of this whole backtalk towards me.” chan criticises, and you laugh bitterly after picking up on his audible disappointment as it hits your ears. “see? there it is again. maybe i’ve gotta teach you some manners, hm?” his tone is sultry once more, leaving you fighting the urge to flush under his gaze. you ultimately lose though, wanting nothing more than to punch him in the face with the way he snickers at your cheeks reddening crimson. instead, you try retain the little dignity you have left as you push against his chest, scanning your parameters with paranoia when he steps closer to you.

“we can’t.” you mumble, clearly slipping. chan’s only response to that is a breathless huff, warm against your face as you peer up at him through your lashes, finally getting a good look at him. he’s wearing his signature hoop earrings today, hair brushed down so his bangs fall over his forehead. the collar of that same dress shirt he’s got on is popped despite a few buttons being undone, leaving the styling choice to highlight his collarbone. that same milky skin you’ve ghosted your nails over multiple times hides underneath the black fabric, leaving you to shiver at the memories of it. it also doesn’t help that the way he towers you is sending your mind reeling into submission way too easily, and you only manage to shake out of it when his fingers trail down to wrap around your wrist, allowing you to feel the cold metal of a ring you recognise all too well press into your joint—

the same half of a promise ring you’d helped him pick out for aeri a year ago.

the realisation that he’s still wearing it hits, and combined with the once again forming shame in the back of your head, it all makes you want to shove him away in favour of storming out of here to tell your best friend everything once and for all. a part of you can sense undue jealousy simmering inside at the fact that he’s still got a piece of her with him too, something you know you have no right to feel, but you try ignore it to your best ability. “chan, we can’t.” you repeat with a hitch in your breath, more so for yourself than him. and yet, you don’t even believe your own words, finding the less rational and weak side of you surrendering to the temptation chan tantalises in you; it overshadows whatever morality you have left.

“d’you really want me to stop?” he breathes out, body sagging far too close into yours for it to be friendly, although you suppose none of your interactions since starting this scandalous relationship have ever been that. his fingers, the very same ones bearing the ring on them, move to wrap around your throat, forcing you to tilt your head up and lock eyes with him. goosebumps prick your skin when you catch sight of the way his gaze is hooded, orbs swirling with black desire he’s begun to reserve only for you in these coming weeks. “because, if you want me to stop, i will.” chan points out. “say the word and i’ll turn around. out of sight, out of mind.” he makes a statement out of it by retracting his hand from you, but the very distinct whine you let out is all the confirmation he needs to press his mouth to yours.

kissing chan always feels like playing with fire. it scorches, and singes, and sears, reducing you to a burnt crisp, yet you can’t help but yearn for the flame he ignites in you. even the way he’s clutching onto you now, pressing forward with a fervour only you bring out in him, has his lips moulding against your cherry stained ones despite not fitting as perfectly as you’d want them to. the two of you are by no means a compatible match for each other; neither of you has made a single good decision ever since you began indulging in whatever you’ve got going on, but you also can’t help but crave the scandalous nature of everything. you’re truly a despicable pair, you think.

“get in the car.” chan’s voice cuts through your thoughts when he pulls away. he doesn’t even give you time to think when he walks over and opens the door, gesturing inside to the warm confines of the backseat. ideally, you shouldn’t, you know you shouldn’t, but alas, you’ve never been one to listen to yourself, instead finding your legs scrambling and following suit to shuffle into jake’s vehicle before the weight of your actions even sinks in. chan’s hot on your trail too, and before you can even get comfortable in the cramped space, he’s returning to making out with you, fingers roaming greedily around the expanse of your skin.

“t-they’ll know we’re gone.” you stutter, moving your face out of his reach to try and stop chan’s movements when it finally dawns on you that your friends had sent you out on an errand you’d taken far too long to complete by now. chan’s only response is to grunt though, tugging you back in for another smouldering kiss that knocks the wind out of your lungs. his hands grasp, pinch, and squeeze whatever part of you they can, until he’s finally decided that he’s had enough foreplay, opting to cage you underneath him and hike up the tight, red dress that’s adorning your body for today’s occasion. “i’ll be quick. i always am.” he winks, and you’re too far gone now to understand that he’s responding to your previous comment, a fact that only makes him chuckle.

“wore this to tease me, yeah?” chan clicks his tongue at the way he has to practically peel off the bottom half of your clothing, the snug fit of the fabric around your curves leaving nothing to the imagination as he bites his lip. he debates whether he’s glad you chose this outfit to show off for him, or if that pisses him off because it means everybody gets an eyeful of your figure; he decides on the latter. “wanted to slut yourself out for my attention? all you had to do was ask, baby.” you shake your head with a whimper, and he raises an eyebrow at your reaction. “d-didn’t.. didn’t wear it for you.” you manage to breathe out, which proves to be the wrong answer because next thing you know, his hand is coming down to smack your clothed core.

you yelp at the sting of his actions, teary eyes blinking up at him in a way that makes chan’s boxers tighten. he’s so close to losing his composure, but he holds back for your sake, not wanting to let you see his cool slip. “is that so? i guess you’re just a dirty girl then.” he sneers, yanking down your soaked panties in one swift motion, leaving you to gasp as the cool air hits your sticky folds.

chan wastes not even one second, knobby digits dragging through the wetness he’s not surprised to find whatsoever. he spreads it over your clit, getting you messier than you already are, especially from the way you appear to leak even more arousal from his movements. he touches you until you’re twitching under his hold, biting back the sounds that threaten to escape you, which seems to be a fact he doesn’t approve of from the way he pinches your nub between his fingers; you cry out softly from the rush of stimulation it shoots through you. “eyes on me.” chan growls, sliding his hand down to circle your oozing hole before he’s abruptly shoving two fingers inside.

“fuck.” you moan this time, loud and clear. this seems to satisfy him, seeing as he rewards you with a steady pump of his digits thrusting into your heat. his speed in fingering you increases quickly, and it isn’t long before he’s scissoring you open, the sloppy sounds of your juices slicking up his fingers and echoing in the stuffy space of jake’s car. you’re probably staining the leather of the seats, but neither you nor chan seem to care about that right now, not when he’s knuckle deep inside your wet cunt and you’re making such pretty noises all for him.

“just filthy, aren’t ya? getting finger fucked in the back of your friends car. i bet your dumb little brain can’t even understand what i’m saying right now.” chan mocks, his tone laced with a level of condescension that only makes you buck your hips up to chase his movements. you know he’s completely right too, because the way he’s thrusting his digits inside you, stroking your warm walls with the tips of them has you seeing stars to the point you can’t even respond back something snarky in return. “all you’re good for is being a nasty toy for sir’s use, hm?” you barely even register his question, only remembering you need to answer him when he pulls his wet hand away to smack you once more, this time over your swollen bundle of nerves.

“y-yes, sir. only a toy for you. jus’ you.” you mindlessly slur out, and chan groans at that. not even a moment passes before he’s sinking his fingers back inside you, curling them up to massage that rough spot which always has you clenching down on him. his expression twists to a smug one when you jerk forward instantly. bingo, he thinks. “that’s that spot there, yeah? the one that has you losing yourself on me?” he coos, but his voice drips with a smidge of venom you can’t quite fixate on just yet. instead, you nod dumbly, spasming around him as you try grind upwards to chase the rising sensation of your climax.

chan leans into your frame, one hand splayed flat onto jake’s backseat above your head to maintain his balance whilst his body hovers over you. by now, your eyes are clenched shut, but he can’t even find it in him to get mad at you over that, not when you’re dribbling down his wrist and mewling so pretty under the glow of the night as he works you towards your orgasm. “c’mon, baby. cum f’me. wanna see you cum so pretty for sir.” he encourages, jaw locked with concentration.

it only takes about one or two flicks of his expertly trained thumb pressing on your puffy clit, combined with the pads of his fingers hitting your g-spot with terrifying accuracy, before you’re shuddering through your climax. a small, clear stream of liquid sprays out the sides of where he’s got you plugged up, and he pulls his hand away in favour of rubbing you over to coax out the last remnants of your high. your quivering body thrashes when he tries to draw out the remaining few droplets again, weakly bringing your arm up to push him away gently when the shocks of overstimulation begin to take over. chan dips down to place one, final kiss on your lips, smooching down to your chin as a way to say you did well. his actions make you heart beat out of your chest, but you don’t say anything about the domesticity of them.

you wonder if he ever treated aeri like this after having been intimate with her.

“go in first. i’ll clean up the car.” chan clears his throat after a short while, not daring to make eye contact with you as he quietly pulls your underwear back up your legs. you watch in silence while he sits up, looking for a rag to fix the mess you two made when that same awkward air you’ve gotten used to facing with him enters the atmosphere, leaving you to try and ignore how it tugs at the strings of your soul as you give a curt nod. “don’t forget the beer.” you remind him before swinging the door open to step outside, finding yourself back in the nipping cold of the winter night.

you try and stand on your wobbly legs to straighten out the creases of your dress, paying no mind to the way your skin echoes with the ghost of chan’s previous touch. behind you, you can hear him rolling down the windows to let the musky smell of sex out of jake’s backseat, and you almost dare to sneak a glance back until deciding against it, knowing it’ll just hurt more. instead, you close your eyes and take a deep breath, opening them to land on the small balcony of your friend’s apartment where the rest of your group seems to have already gathered from the silhouettes you can see through the foggy glass. your conscience feels heavy with the weight of the knowledge that aeri is up there too, but you brush it off, just like all the other times you have.

i didn’t do anything wrong, you tell yourself, i’m still in the clear. that’s the second lie you’ve tried to believe in these last two months. a long sigh escapes your lips at that realisation, but you bite it down when making your way back inside the building, choosing to rack your brain on what shitty excuse you’ll have to provide this time for being gone so long.

. . .

to your surprise, nobody bothers to question why either you or chan disappeared, simply whisking you back in conversation about unrelated topics when you walk in through the door a few minutes before him. as per usual, your heart still feels heavy when you watch aeri laugh at something heeseung and sieun are arguing over, but you cover it up by letting out a noise of amusement yourself, hoping it throws off any suspicion that might be directed your way. you don’t bother turning your head upon hearing jake’s delight at the sight of chan entering his apartment with the very much requested pack of beer too, deciding to force a smile at whatever point heeseung is busy making over looking back no matter how much your body itches to do so.

it’s even worse how from the corner of your eye, you can see aeri shifting uncomfortably on her feet at her ex-boyfriend’s second arrival, her expression dropping in the slightest so as to not draw attention to herself, but it’s still enough for you to notice. it only makes the weight of your actions dawn on you further, and you can’t help but let your mind wander as to what she’d say if she knew what truly went on behind closed doors. despite your best efforts to bury those thoughts beneath you though, you know there’s nothing you can do to make amends to the problems you’ve created yourself. after all, you’ve got to reap what you sow.

the party continues to kick in on full swing after that, with you and aeri both doing your best to keep your distances from chan for all too different reasons. it doesn’t help that you can feel someone’s stare raking across your figure throughout the duration of the evening, and when you finally do decide to sneak a glance in that direction with expectations of finding chan ogling you over, you’re met with a different answer—

for it isn’t you he’s busy looking at, but rather your best friend that’s been glued to your side since the beginning of the night.

he averts his gaze as quick as he’d cast it when you catch him, seamlessly blending back in discussion with whatever nonsense changbin is rambling about this time, acting like he hadn’t just been getting an eyeful of his ex-girlfriend moments prior. you also don’t miss how he fiddles with the old ring that adorns his right hand, long fingers twisting it around the middle digit in a way that’s reminiscent of his past behaviour, or at least based on what you’d often find him doing back then.

his actions spark a memory deep from the confines of your brain, one you wish you hadn’t remembered as the vision of chan asking you to help pick out promise rings for him and aeri crosses your mind. it was raining heavily that day, but he’d insisted that the two of you go out in secret anyways so he could buy his then girlfriend a token of his love and appreciation. he’d claimed you knew her taste the best and could therefore help in selecting a better possible gift for their upcoming anniversary than he ever could.

you’d hesitantly agreed, and although you weren’t sure how it would all play out, you later found yourself sharing an umbrella and visiting various jewellery stores to point out all the designs you knew your closest friend would adore. chan had settled soon on a matching pair for the two of them, beaming in your direction with a bright smile that left you weak in the knees despite however much you tried to hide it. a few days later, aeri excitedly showed off her own silver band to you, buzzing about how he’d chosen the perfect present that she couldn’t wait to replace with a real one in their future; you couldn’t help then but think if he ever told her it was all your idea instead of his.

“hey, can you hold my phone?” your best friend’s voice cuts through your inner replay, and you blink in a daze to find her facing you, expression innocent. “hyunjin asked to play beer pong, and i don’t have any pockets to put it away in safely.” she explains at your confused face, but all you can do is nod as you robotically outstretch your arm to take it off of her. unfortunately or fortunately, that’s when you notice it—

the same matching ring on her hand.

aeri doesn’t pay you any attention when she drops off her device into your awaiting palm, not even realising you’re zeroed in on the jewellery that decorates her left hand with a fire burning in your eyes that you’re both ignorant of. you don’t stop gaping even when felix shakes your shoulder, asking you what you’re so fixated on before leaving you be under the impression that you’re probably just drunk out of your head. meanwhile, you’re still frozen in place, everything around you seeming to slow down.

why is chan wearing a ring he bought for his ex-girlfriend two years ago to a party he knows she’s going to be at? no, why does said ex-girlfriend also have her matching pair of the ring on her hand at a party she too is aware he’s going to be present for? much less, why are either of them hung up on each other to the point they’re carrying around reminders of their past relationship with one another? you know the answer to all these questions, but you don’t wish to sit and delve into them in fear you might throw up at the conclusion they’ll give you. instead, all you can do is squeeze the can of seltzer you’d spiked in your hand dangerously tight out of unwanted emotion, enough for some of the liquid inside to spill out. you can’t be bothered to care about it though, just like how you can’t be bothered to care about how anybody in their right mind could probably see you gawking at chan right now.

you watch as he cracks up at a joke seungmin makes, his head falling back in a fit of laughter you’ve been a happy witness or recipient of multiple times, yet this time it fills you with emotion that you don’t wish to identify in fear it’d mean something more than what you’re capable of confronting right now. even so, you can’t stop the train of questions invading your thoughts at the view in front of you. did he laugh like that with aeri? smile so wide with her? couldn’t help the joy that spread across due to her presence? maybe that’s why he came today, because he couldn’t take his mind off of her, especially seeing as he was wearing a symbol of their time spent before right now.

but, what does that say about you in this picture? were you just a scapegoat to escape all those feelings for him? had you been one this entire time, only deluding yourself into thinking what you both had translated into a situation deeper and could potentially progress into one even more had things happened under different circumstances? the more you think, the more you feel nauseous, and you can’t stop yourself from diverting your gaze to where your best friend is, observing her concentrated face as she attempts to aim a ping pong ball into one of the lined up solo cups. your eyes involuntarily flicker to the ring on her finger once more, its evident shimmer reflecting in the light causing you to clutch your drink tighter.

you’re not a jealous person by any means. you know your boundaries, hence you know chan isn’t yours. he isn’t an object you can own, and neither are you to him. that was the unspoken agreement you both nodded on when you got into this entire ordeal— you’re both free to see other people openly in front of aeri as long as it’s not each other, because the latter you manage in secret despite the shame that surges in you two upon doing so. it doesn’t matter if you wish to stake your claim on him, to see the marks you leave on him evident on his skin the next morning for him to show off other girls who think they stand a chance at him taking them to bed. it doesn’t matter how much your heart aches when you wake up to the blanket strewn aside from his absence, the sheets long gone cold to indicate that he’d left hours ago. it doesn’t matter how much you wish to cling onto his arm in public and profess your.. feelings for him in front of everyone else.

it simply doesn’t matter, it never did. chan’s never been yours, and he never will be anytime soon.

20:51 PM from: Myself meet me at the upstairs bathroom in five

you punch in the message before you can even think, watching it turn from delivered to read in a matter of seconds. the three dots next to chan’s side of texts appear, indicating that he’s typing, but you choose to lock your device rather than waiting like a dog to see him reply. instead, your feet lead you to your designated location, taking one step at a time leisurely as opposed to in a rush so as to not draw unwanted attention to yourself. right as you reach the door handle, your phone pings with a familiar ringtone.

20:52 PM from: dni!!! Reacted with “👍🏻” to your message

you sigh. tonight was going to be a long night.

. . .

skin slapping. heavy panting. low grunting.

that’s all you can hear from where you’re splayed across the sink in the small confines of jake’s bathroom, aside from the occasional thumping of music booming from downstairs. if you strain your ear enough, you’ll be able to make out the lyrics to the cliche song that’s come up on shuffle, but you honestly lack the mentality to care about that right now, especially considering the way chan has your legs pushed apart in favour of drilling his length into you. each thrust is rapid and fervent in nature, seeming to knock the wind out of your lungs to the point you don’t even realise how loud you’re being until his hand comes up to shove two fingers in your mouth. “be fucking quiet.” he sneers, leaving you to drool everywhere. the only reaction he spares when you try muffle out an apology is a sickening smirk at that too.

“needed this, didn’t you, slut? always need to be filled with some cock like a bitch in heat.” chan chuckles, but there’s a dark edge to his voice that sends shivers crawling up your spine. he presses down on your tongue with the pads of his fingers, and you can’t stop the garbling of spit choking past your lips from the way his thickness nestles deep inside you. each heavy drag of his dick against your rough walls leaves you clenching and attempting to buck your hips forward, but you can’t even manage that with the grip he has on your waist. the mere idea that all chan really needs to restrain you is the simple strength of his one hand sends your mind reeling, so much so that you don’t even realise he’s speaking to you until the hand that was previously in your mouth pulls out to slap light and wet against your cheek.

“i asked you a question, whore.” chan growls, the sound resonating warm within your stomach despite the mean undertone to it as his movements still. you blink up at him in confusion at this point, doe eyes brimming with tears that threaten to spill from the loss of pleasure in a way that has chan damn near finishing. it doesn’t help that he’s buried to the hilt currently, hissing painfully at how you squeeze down on him in involuntary instinct. for a split second, you swear you see the ridges on his face soften, and the manner in which he looms over you feels filled with more comfort than intimidation, but that smidge of emotion vanishes as soon as it arrives. “i said,” chan’s tongue swipes over his bottom lip. “do you wanna get caught?” you rapidly shake your head no at that, and chan cocks his head to the side.

“oh, really?” he muses, nails sliding over to dig into the supple flesh of your thigh, making you whine out loud. “‘cause with the way you’re making so much noise like that, i’d have assumed the opposite.” with a click of his tongue, his actions resume. luckily, all that escapes you is a loud gasp this time, an anxious clamp of your palm over your mouth barely covering up the rest of your lewdity. you wish so desperately to refute, to plead him in favour of slowing down and having some mercy, but the sensation of his bulbous cockhead slamming roughly into that one spot only sends stars in your vision and prevents your previous desires.

your body jerks in chan’s hold even more when his same hand still lubed with your saliva finds it way between where you’re connected, leaving you to suppress a pathetic whimper that longs to bubble out of your throat as he presses the tips of his fingers to your swollen clit. his touch is harsh, filled with an overwhelming need to make you burst at the seams, but the fear that lingers in the back of your head refuses to let you fall apart so easily, not when aeri is barely a flight of stairs from your vicinity. chan decides he isn’t fond of the silence you’re giving him though, pulling out with a quiet mumble for you to get down and face the mirror. he sheaths himself back in just as quickly, setting an unforgiving pace from the seemingly more accessible position, and this time, you really can’t stop the long drawn out moan that escapes you.

“j-just like that, yeah, baby? all those filthy noises are just for me, aren’t they?” he sounds more delirious this time, presumably drunk off the essence of this situation from the possessive gibberish he’s spouting, just like he always does in the heat of the moment. unfortunately for you, you’re no better than him, nodding furiously in agreement as you babble high-pitched and breathy. “so good, sir! s-so, so fucking good, feels so good! wan’ cum f’you, p-please. ‘m a good girl, please lemme cum, please, please, please.” small stutters spew out of you mid-sentence, but neither of you can be bothered by them, too wrapped up in the throes of all-consuming passion and contempt even to register what’s being said.

“such a nasty, nasty girl.. getting fucked by your best friend’s ex. don’t you feel a-any shame?” chan groans almost wearily in midst of his lust-filled haze, eyes catching yours from the reflection of the mirror that’s displaying you getting absolutely wrecked right now. the sight of you so fucked up and in bliss, no coherent thought visible by the looks of your dazed expression and tongue halfway lolling out— it all has him burning with hot, rampant hunger. hunger for you, hunger to claim you. “look at yourself.” he rasps, fingers clutching at your chin to force you into meeting where he is. “look how dirty you are, fuck. what would she say about you wrapped so warm and snug around my cock? hm? think we should— ah. think we should call her in and find out?”

the tears that were brewing in your waterline are streaming down your face by now, horrifically mimicking the disgusting manner in your wetness seeping and dripping down chan’s balls. you feel awful. downright terrible and tainted, forever branded by the searing touch of chan’s skin grazing against yours because that’s what you are, that’s what you have been for the past two months. down from the night you let him lead you into his sheets, following the countless occasions you found yourself returning there, and finally falling to now, your underwear strewn across the tiles of jake’s bathroom as you spread your legs for the same man who broke your best friend’s heart; the same man who you’ve let into yours after very consciously disregarding the repercussions of your actions.

you’re truly a loathsome piece of work.

“think she’d like to watch me fill this pussy up? watch me shoot my load deep inside you over and over again until i’m sure it’s taken?” chan mutters, hot breath fanning against your sweaty neck. “maybe i should breed this stupid cunt full of my seed and send you back out there with it spilling past your legs. that way, every time you sit down, you’ll feel it inside you.” the mental image of his release lodged in your walls as you’re surrounded by all your friends, surrounded by the one person you’ve both been hiding from, all of them oblivious to the way he’s staked his claim on you except for the shared knowledge between you two and you two only— it has you quivering to the point you physically keen in his hold. chan, however, just laughs sadistically at your reaction.

“you’ll feel it as a reminder of me, yeah? a reminder that you’re just as terrible as me. coming to me to get this slutty cunt stuffed even though you know you shouldn’t.” he continues to whisper. “after all, it takes two to tango, darling.” chan makes it a point to tilt his hips up in an effort to ensure his mushroom tip hits your g-spot with precise force, all the while breathlessly uttering more sickening words in your ear in hopes of fulfilling your need for relief.

surely enough, the combination of his cock shoving itself past your opening and his guilt-inducing remarks that only make you sob harder work you up to the point of no return. all it really takes after that is one touch of his thumb to your pulsating nub to eventually have you seizing up in no time, your pussy messily tightening and gushing as your high crashes over you in large waves of ecstasy. it seems to trigger him too, because by the time you even realise you’re there, chan’s twitching and leaking spurts of thick cum inside you. there’s so much of it that it trickles past where he’s got you plugged up, and you barely comprehend yourself pushing a hand near your oozing hole to catch it on your fingertips.

you both come to slowly, ragged breathing that fills the air growing quieter to pair with the musk of the room. chan’s gaze is still trained on you through the mirror, unreadable just like always whenever you’ve made the same mistake again, but you take the opportunity in this instance specifically to raise the hand that’s collected his seed in it to your mouth, proceeding to lick up the droplets of his excess release. even though you don’t catch his stare in the reflection, you can still feel it burning holes through your head, a fact that only leaves goosebumps rising over your skin. it’s only when you pull your hand away once more to catch the last of his remaining cum that he decides to finally interject, grabbing your palm in his coarse one with hooded eyes. they’re blown out when he tugs your back flush into his chest, the impact leaving his length pushing deeper inside, and they’re blown out when his fingers wrap around your neck to give it a slight squeeze, the little loss of oxygen making your mind spin.

“you think that’s funny? teasing me even after i just fucked you? after i left my mark on you and made sure you know that you’re mine?” chan murmurs, lips sultrily ghosting the shell of your ear. you want to fixate on what he’d addressed you as, let it marinate in your thoughts and brood over it for the next weeks to come even if it was just an absentminded slip of the mouth, but your focus is interrupted by the moving of his hips against yours picking up once more. the previously repeated actions send his dick driving into you again, breaching your cervix and pressing deliciously into every nook and cranny in a way that has you nearly losing your footing, but chan is quicker to hold you up with his free hand. “w-wait, ‘m still sensitive.” you manage to tremble out at a particularly well-placed graze of his cock, but chan doesn’t seem to care, grinding into you even more eagerly at your admission to the point you struggle to keep the sounds spilling out you at bay.

there’s a resounding knock on the door all of a sudden, one that makes your breath hitch and your chest twist in uneasiness. some part of you feels wary and on edge, and you would assume chan’s movements would halt at that, but he doesn’t show any signs of stopping, ignoring your frantic attempts to make him do so by holding you in place instead as he begins to pick up the pace. “s-stop, we’ll get caught.” you heave out upon the noise of skin slapping rising in volume. you do your best to stand your ground, to avoid the gradual closing of your eyes and the mushy fog of your brain clouding over in euphoria, but it’s to no avail. you’re about to let go of your inhibitions completely, to forget about what had just happened and throw caution into the wind in order to lose yourself in the moment, until—

“y/n, i know you’re in there with chris.”

. . .

comments and reblogs are always appreciated! <3

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thepersonnamedsam · 1 year ago

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carlos‘ song - cs55

pairing: carlos sainz x fem!reader

summary: you wrote a song about carlos

word count: 1.2k

warnings: angst, mentions of death, anxiety, sad stuff

note: i have been obsessed with carlo‘s song lately and i just had to write something for carlos, bc obv carlo‘s - carlos

masterlist / taglist

Standing on the rooftop of this bar in Madrid, your short hair blew in the cold air. Apparently it’s not just any bar, the bar is placed on a fire tower.

The sun was just about to set and you tried to keep your hair under control. „You know, I liked it more when it was long.“ Carlos looked at you with his big brown round eyes and it reminded you of a deer caught in a headlight.

„Oh really?“, you grinned. When you two first met you were only 12 years old, little best friend of Isa. You never taught you would one day stay on this roof top with her brother.

„Yeah, do you remember drinking in the parking lot? By the trail head? Yeah, I liked your hair that day.“

You felt heat rush to your head, you blamed it on the cold. „Okay, I can grow it out long, if you’d like that?“

You only just moved back to Madrid. Ida was supposed to pick you up from the airport but instead there stood a bright red Ferrari with not Isa but her brother Carlos instead. And he didn’t take you to his sisters, no he treated you to a drink on the fire tower.

Only the good die young was playing on the speakers.

„You know, I never understood what Billy Joel meant with those lyrics“, you thought out loud. „Didn’t you just study english literature?“ - „Yeah, and?“ Your eyebrows raised at him, silently questioning his thoughts.

„Like, aren’t you just supposed to know what he meant with his lyrics?“

„I mean, I have my own meaning, but it’s ridiculous.“ - „No, please tell me, because I always laugh at the lyrics“, Carlos said.

„I mean, obviously in the first verse he wants to have sex with virgin catholic girls. And ‚only the good die young‘ you can argue about that - young people who die didn’t deserve it, therefore they were good. Or old people aren’t good anymore, or many more.“

„Not ridiculous“, he smiled. „Huh?“ - „Your meaning of the song isn’t ridiculous, not in the slightest.“

You smiled, hard. Carlos was an interesting man and you wondered what more grew under that perfect skin of his.

„I think we are going to be good friends, Carlos“, you told him. „You think so?“, was his answer. You nodded and grinned at him.

Over the time you grew closer together, Carlos showed you parts of Madrid you only remembered vaguely from your childhood. But the distance of his job hurt more and more. You knew what a relationship with him meant. You knew only too good, heard Isa over the phone crying over missing her brother.

But the days he spent in between were the best you ever experienced.

„I want a big house out in the open. Where the sun always shines and all the light gets into the house!“, Carlos gushed. You were laying on the couch together and planned how your future would look like if money didn’t matter - not that it did anyway.

„Whys that?“, you asked him. „I don’t like the way my skin feels when it’s not shown on by the sun. I like the warmth, never liked the cold, brrr“, his arms snaked around your upper body and shook it like you were freezing.

Your laugh was heard throughout the apartment. Carlos grinned at you, his skin warming with the sound of your happiness.

„Why don’t you like the way your skin feels without the sun?“

„It makes me feel like I need to escape my own body. Like I don’t belong, it just feels wrong.“

„Well I hope you can escape your skin with me“, you smiled at the man you were falling more and more in love with.

But you still never went to a grand prix with him. And when he asked you why, you came up with a new excuse as not to.

You started to pick up more work, started to work over the weekends. You had less and less time to call Carlos over the weekend, making him question your feelings for him.

Until it happened. It happened on a Saturday at FP2. It was quickly over. You only heard about the incident the next day, as you wondered why Carlos didn’t start.

Isa called you. 48 seconds. That’s how long the phone call lasted. The news shattered your heart. Broken into millions of pieces. You couldn’t believe it, no, Isa was definitely playing pranks with you.

You fell, you fell deep into a hole. A hole you never knew you sighed it yourself. Deeper and deeper. Until Isa visited you. She brought you his clothes he still had at home. She brought his necklace that he was about to gift you. His initials graved into the back of the pendant.

But still, everyone who started talking about him being gone, you shut out. You shut them right out, because in your mind he was still alive, he was still racking and he was winning.

But the reality was none of that. And reality hit you, it hit you hard. His memorial was held at the end of the season. And Isa asked you to talk about him. You had to admit he was dead.

„I can’t do it, Isa.“ - „Please, you were his everything, he talked so much about you! Did you know he had been crushing on you since he was 16?“

„Did you set us up? The day you didn’t pick me up from the airport and instead sent him?“

Isa looked at you, just like Carlos had when he was caught doing something he shouldn’t have. This big brown eyes. Glistening with mischief - it was something that all of the Sainz family possessed.

„You caught me“, she shamelessly shrugged with her shoulders and smirked at you. „It was time? He was pining on you for so long, but you were away studying and he was so sad, I had to do it, it was his only chance!“

His memorial was beautiful, the whole grid present. Charles and Frédéric spoke about his time at Ferrari, Lando held a speech about their friendship and Isa sung a beautiful song. She still tried to convince you to speak, but you just couldn’t.

Isa and you still regularly talked to each other. She was doing good, better than her anyway. You almost never talked about Carlos. You weren’t bringing him up, neither did she.

The one thing Isa told you was: „Grief is just love letting go. It’s okay to let go.“

You almost cried - how could she say that like it was just spilled milk?

„Look at yourself, when’s the last time you cut your hair? You always kept it short, but now?“

You did visit him at his grave. Brought flowers and letters for him to read. Eventually you wrote a song. A song to remember him - Carlos‘ Song.

And one day you stood on a stage, at the bar they had their first date at and sung Carlos‘ Song.

Isa was there, smiling up at you and filming the whole thing. „I’m going to show it to my parents“, she smiled.

And you knew Carlos was smiling down on you and kept you alive.

°°°

@ironmaiden1313 , @topguncultleader , @biglittlesecret , @gulabjamooon , @lovelyy-moonlight , @peachyplumsss , @mistrose23 , @copper-boom , @love4lando , @champomiel , @serenityleah , @iloveyou3000morgan , @angelwithoutmywings , @elleeeee21 , @youkissedareaderinthedark , @mikauraur , @thybulleric , @lpab , @fdl305 , @mellowarcadefun , @teti-menchon0604 , @vildetry06 , @bibissparkles , @aurora-maria , @lunnnix , @sya-skies , @Buckywifeyy , @dakotali , @rechtrecht , @noncannonships , @1eclerc16 , @pitlanebabe , @sopheeg , @avengersheart , @thatsadsmallchild , @peachiicherries , @idkiwantchocolatee , @callsign-scully , @mehrmonga , @badbatch-simp24 , @lissyontour , @din0nugs , @elliegrey2803 , @gay-for-victoria-de-angelis , @10vely-yutazen , @daggersquadphantom , @azriel-the-shadowsinger , @i-love-scott-mccall , @darleneslane , @mikauraur , @heartmetaphor , @darleneslane , @ellswilliams , @thxtmarvelchick , @nataliambc , @dontjudgeabookbythecover , @hockeyboysarehot , @thehistoryone

#f1 x reader #formula 1 #f1 #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz #carlos sainz x you #carlos sainz x y/n #carlos sainz angst #carlos sainz fanfic #formula one #formula 1 x reader #formula one x reader #Spotify

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laststandx3 · 1 year ago

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There are many bad things about wish, but one of the most annoying is how it fails to pay off its own set ups.

It's established Asha's father believes in the magic from the stars. He died of an illness (never specified), that Asha's grandfather (her father's father) never got his wish granted in YEARS, well now to me this feels targeted.

Follow my thoughts for a minute, how easy would have been with this already established set up to add the part where it's Magnifico who killed Asha's dad because he was promoting a different kind of magic that would undermine Magnifico's power? This would've established Magnifico as an actual villain from the start, manipulating people's perception of him with magic and the lengths he would go to keep his power and crown.

This would have impacted Asha's journey as well,instead of asking Magnifico to grant her grandfather's wish immediately (which imo is a good reason for him not to hire her, she literally asks for favoritism the moment she arrives), let her instead be perfect for the position, not clumsy and awkward but make her qualified and respectful of the king's secrecy about the wishes. And still she's still not hired. And then she starts questioning him, she's studied, she's ready and it's not enough and the king seemed to like her until she mentioned her father.

And then she talks with the people of rosa about the king, if that was unfair of him maybe , but the answer is that the king is good and kind and doesn't he grants everyone's wishes, isn't that so wonderful of him? (and maybe this can be a song) and at first it sounds like she just doesn't want to accept that she wasn't chosen but after the forth person answers the same exact thing, well then this starts to feel more like a script than an original thought. Just then she looks at all the wishes Magnifico's granted so far and they're all material, it's all about people owning bigger houses, better clothes, riches, nothing is about community, knowledge, about people becoming something(musicians, teachers, scientists, artists...) . The guy that got his wish granted last year also got it granted a few years ago too, Isn't that weird? Some people never get their wishes and this guy twice? And also his wish was so selfish? He wanted a swimming pool! How in the best kingdom, with the best king, nobody wishes nice things for others? And isn't that weird that she and her friends used to make graffitis and jokes on the guards but when Sleepy gave away his wish at 18 suddenly he doesn't make jokes about Magnifico's beard anymore? He's so respectful of the rules now.

And idk maybe Asha doesn't just wish upon a star and everything is given to her. Maybe Magnifico's source of magic is Star and she frees it and that's why Star tags along. The magic of the starts was real, her father was right! Star knew her dad, he tried to save the magical pet but he was killed instead! Now it's not just about freedom and justice she wants revenge. And this is maybe when she fucks up because she was too reckless, she got discovered. Her friends/family are watching how she's getting arrested/executed for treason and that's SO UNFAIR such a cognitive dissonance it breaks Magnifico's brainwash spell.

Now a song about revolution makes sense. But singing about revolution bc they want to be able to wish? Are you kidding me? Not only the movie established that you can have new wishes and that they make you whole again, but also girl, you all read the terms of services when giving Magnifico your wish. You give it to him and if he finds it worth it, it'll be granted. Making questions about the king choices is the opposite of living under a monarchy.

Ultimately I agree with everyone who says this movie feels empty, because it's true, it's a bunch of disney trope stitched together with easter eggs that don't makes us feel anything and that contradicts its own message. The fact that disney doesn't want to make grey characters anymore it's felt. And it mirrors the way people have started to see enjoying stories as media consumption, everything that alludes to people being flawed is an endorsement of abuse. So disney's characters have all turned is these empty shells of heroine tropes. They're always bubbly, their worst flaw is being clumsy, but the worst is that they're always right. Asha's quest to free the wishes is based only on her conviction that the king is wrong in not granting everyone's wish. It's never even hinted in the movie that the subjects of rosa lack something. It's a fairy-tale kingdom in every aspect (maybe the king is a bit egocentric but that hasn't hurt anyone so far), except that her grandpa's wish wasn't granted and so the king must be wrong. If it wasn't for Magnifico's long exposition of I don't accept criticism she wouldn't have questioned him. And even then, that's what living in a kingdom means, that you follow the king's rules. I'm sorry but singing about revolution and then ending the movie still under a monarchy is just contradictory with the whole premise.

#wish spoilers #disney wish #Wish 2023 #Wish rewrite #Asha #Magnifico #Grey characters? Not in disney anymore #Where is the flynn Ryder type? Starts selfish becomes a better person #Elsa's self discovery? Anna growing out of idealized people #Moana tries to live on land to make her parents proud! It's only when her grandma gives her the heart that she leaves #Mulan disappoints her parents and leaves to save her dad #Not every plot has to involve the fate of a kingdom. Sometimes it can just be one person #Mulan pretending to be a man is still seen as a terrible thing by the society she lives she doesn't change everyone's mind just the people #She actually interacted with. Yeah and the emperor but she literally saved his life. He'd better be forgiving

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cherrytinz · 9 months ago

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Hello, I really like your character and I’m curious do you have any story on your oc if so, I would love to hear it (:

Hello darling! First of all, thank you so much! It really makes me happy that people like my ocs! It really means a lot. Not to mention that I was generally surprised to see that so many liked Lucy's design! thanks yall! I was so happy to read those comments 🖤

And well, yeah! I want to write a fanfic with her so I have a few things planned. Lucy is an old oc frommmm 2019, but I decided to bring her back to life with a redising and all 🦇

Soooooo Lucy Fernby is a British girl who was born in 1975. Her parents are quite famous musical artists (especially her father) so she always had an approach to music. Actually, Lucy has absolute pitch and ease with some instruments, however she prefers to play the bass and write songs to cope with certain emotions that she doesn't know how to share. If I had to assign her a voice, I would say that she speaks like Gwen of Total Drama but with a British accent (although certainly Serena's voice from downtown is still an option lmao) , and when she sings it would sound like Mary Elizabeth McGlynn.

Even so, her parents (Emily, a goth singer and Luke, a rock band guitarist) got divorced when she was still a child. Her father returns to the USA but still tries to be as present in her life as possible. Despite this, due to a situation that Lucy does not want to talk about, they distance themselves when she is 14. I CLARIFY because I know it is very ambiguous, no, her father did not hurt her or anything, only Lucy keeps everything to herself.

Lucy had a lot of problems that affected her way of relating to others, both with people of her age and with her own parents. Due to a series of bad decisions she misses the school year and that's when her mother decides that it is best to send her to live with her father so that she can get away from "the toxic environment she is in."

(conclusion that Emily draws after brief questions that Lucy did not develop when she answering)

This is how Lucy ends up going to live with her father at the Addison Apartments because well, a rock star who lives in a town that no one knows = peace of mind and time which he can dedicate to his daughter and himself!

oh, another fun fact of her! A year before moving to the Addison Apartments, she had a platonic friend/crush named Meri with whom she lost connection. I mention this because Lucy has a tendency to isolate herself when something happens and simply end a relationship instead of fighting for it, which she did at the time with Sally and the rest of the gang, but she has learned to be more open about how she feels.

thanks for asking! just in case, if anyone is interested feel free to ask me anything abt my ocs or even if you want to know my headcanons of Sally Face (in this case bc im in others fandoms like BG3 and Gorillaz) I'm more than happy to share them 💖💖💖

#sally face #sally face oc #sally face fandom #sally face fanart #sal fisher #larry johnson #ashley campbell #todd morrison #my art #artists on tumblr

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raainberry · 1 year ago

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Rewind You

« To rewind is to make something go back to the beginning or to an earlier point. »

Sana x gn!reader

Angst

synopsis - your ex’s concert is the last place you should be at after breaking up, yet here you are

��️this (very) short story is told backwards, so from end to the start. i wrote it so you can read it normally and from the end. both ways will make sense, but the chronology in which it’s told will change.

wordcount - 581

T/W - Food (One mention)

A/N - two crazy discoveries led to this: new sana pics and melanie martinez’s unreleased song You Love I from which the concept is inspired. enjoy! or not bc i actually dont know if this is good its too late for me to worry about that🥰

Everything was better with her…

You’d ask yourself how you ended up here, but you knew the answer already.

You felt lost, overwhelmed as a pain you couldn’t seem to let go of persisted deep within your chest, looking around in search for a distraction.

How deluding…

The music was loud, but the tune was off. The lights were bright, but they lacked color. The people around you were happy, dancing and singing along to whatever song came out of those powerful speakers, but it wasn’t infectious.

Your eyes followed the spotlight as it highlighted the artist you hadn’t seen in months. All you could feel when you laid eyes on her was jealousy.

Something you loved and cherished, a place and a person, they’d been ripped away from you the moment you’d parted ways. Yet there she was, still enjoying it all as everyone’s focus and passionate admiration landed solely onto her for the next two minutes.

Minatozaki Sana.

You should have gone to a nightclub... It was the most popular, if not customary short-term remedy to a breakup. Why on Earth were you at a concert instead—her concert out of all?

Needless to say, your split was a fall from grace. Heartbreaking, as you’d expect from a relationship that lasted this long. You’d never broken up with anyone, but you’d seen it in the movies. You knew it would hurt no matter how long you’d seen it coming. You even bought the ice cream in advance, which you unsurprisingly downed in days while living in your memories.

Years. Months. Days. Hours. Every minute you spent together, you made sure to love each other, feeling your hearts swelling at every gesture. A kiss, a touch, or even a simple look was enough to send you to cloud nine. High enough to only see each other.

You’re not sure when everything and everyone else faded out, what mattered was her. You truly liked her. So did she. Perhaps from the moment you’d met. But it took a while to realise just how much you cared about the other.

A first date only came after her clumsy confession one drunken summer night on your balcony. You thought it had been a dream when you woke up the next day. It felt like it at least, when you laid eyes on her and saw her clinging to your shirt in her sleep. Even unconscious, she seemed to be aware of your presence. To want it.

Her conscience never let a second go by without a thought of you either. She made it her mission to satisfy this mindful desire of hers. Texting you at all hours, calling you just to hear the sound of your voice, asking if you could meet her in between two schedules like you would even think about saying no to her.

She was all you could think about. Her smile, her eyes, her laugh, down to her scent. It remained in a corner of your mind, recalling each of them in the late hours of the night as you struggled to fall asleep. The feeling was enchanting, to the point you wondered if she was real. If you’d really met her and she was not someone you’d made up in your dreams to make it all easier.

Life wasn’t that much of a party until you crossed paths with her. While she described her ‘before’ as chaotic, you liked to see yours as the opposite. Just plain boring.

Nothing seemed as colorful, vibrant, or lush without her.

Everything was better with her.

#twice x reader #sana x reader #sana imagines #twice imagines #twice sana #minatozaki sana

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crystallizsch · 8 months ago

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And here I am bringing yet another song that reminds me of ur ocs sigh... Well, kinda, more like a relationship your oc has with someone 😭

I do not want to force u to ship Yuuna and Riddle, let me just get this out of the way😔 In fact if you wanna use this you can use this was just Riddle's little unrequited love for Yuuna<3

Anyways enough😭 ok so one of my favorite singers, Laufey, released a song a while ago called Must be Love and it's just??? So Riddle?? Like it's very Riddle falling for Yuuna kinda thing...

Like especially these two parts... Yes it made me think of him because of the word "Wonderland" but listen!! It's so funny (and cute) to imagine people asking Riddle why he's so distracted and the reason being because he just can't help but be entranced by Yuuna🥺🥺 and the fact that he's so strict with himself and others and now he just acts so dumb and lovestruck because of them

ARHHHHGGG I HOPE IM MAKING SENSE

And then she rejects him😀 oh well

AARUGHH NOOO THAT'S SO CUTEEE

I GET YOU I GET WHAT YOU MEANNN

THE LYRICS ARE ALL SO RIDDLE

like any mild mention of yuuna or reminder of them would get him all unnecessarily flustered and defensive and he doesn't know why at first

and then he finally realizes "oh no" he like likes yuuna

You made a sappy stupid something out of me The kind I swore I'd never be

AUDSGHDSKJFLKD

ALSO SMALL TANGENT. THAT REMINDS ME OF THAT ONE SCENE IN BOOK 2 OF RIDDLE FIXING THE PREFECT'S TIE WHICH GOT ME INTO RIDOYUU IN THE FIRST PLACE

AND IT DIDNT HELP THAT THE MANGA ALSO MADE IT SO CUTE

(YUUNA DOESNT HAVE A TIE AHHH SO HE'S FIXING THEIR COLLAR INSTEAD)

RIDOYUU IS REAL (i am delusional)

okay anywaysss i kind of. did a small comic (+ some extra ramblings) of the confession under the cut ----

i’m still debating on whether i want riddle to already know hes gonna be rejected bc of a reality check from ace/deuce/grim

or if i want him to find out all by himself

because with the first one it’s a slow buildup and dread knowing the answer and when he finally receives the confirmation, riddle allows his heart to 100% break and finally come to terms that there isn’t going to be that kind of reciprocation from yuuna

for the LATTER, I want it to be like he mistook their friendliness as them undoubtedly having the same feelings, like he’s so certain about it. "they're acting this way towards me, so why not?? they'll give me a chance. I'll just make the first move" but he's still nervous, of course, but when he got rejected, it completely upended him because all of what he thought he had misinterpreted. of course he wouldn't blame yuuna for it, he would be more upset with himself for not being able to get it right and assuming in the first place

but EITHER WAY it's good good yummy angst

#HELP WHY IS THE FIRST SMALL COMIC I POST OF YUUNA ANGST #(or technically it become kind of hurt -> comfort ????)#i shouldnt be making my beloved british boy suffer #but here we are #anyways sorry this took me a bit my rambles get messy 🧍#also every time i always love the songs you find mah #theyre just so hgkdjfdsjsk thank you 😭💖#[—✦-#-✧ my art #-✧ comic #-✧ lovely music recs #riddle rosehearts #twst manga #(💝) yuuna #(💝) strawberry fondue #-✦—]#ridoyuu as in like #unrequited love -> friends #augh i love them i swear ;;;;

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lonelyroommp3 · 24 days ago

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25, 26, 28!

25. name a song that makes you think about someone you love

i got FAR too deep on that last set of answers so i feel like if i continue by bringing out a proper earnest serious lovey dovey answer about very nice love songs i actually associate with my beautiful wonderful girlfriend i will magically explode into a pile of goo or something. so i will keep those secrets for myself and instead say that when we were in ireland together we spent half the time crafting an increasingly incomprehensible parody of guess by charli xcx based entirely on our various (already inscrutable to anybody but us) injokes & the assortment of tumblr posts we were obsessed with quoting that week until the entire song was reduced to pure nonsensical gibberish. now we can easily drive each other to instant insanity by just texting each other the words "you wanna THIS"

26. name a song that makes you think about someone you don't like

picture this, it's the final project of my masters degree, i'm paired with one other musical direction student to assist on the MA musical theatre showcases (format: everybody picks two songs - either 2 musical theatre songs or one MT and one pop song - and a monologue and gets those taped; the accompaniment was split between us and the professional MD leading the project). the professional MD in question is a guy i already have beef with because i found him really hard to read and i also found his teaching & mentorship style deeply patronising. i had a panic attack halfway through the process and went and cried to the course leader about how much i hated this guy & he literally emailed him telling him to be nicer to me. it didn't work because literally the day we were due to film he randomly reassigned two of my pop songs to the other student MD, with no explanation other than the implication that i wasn't playing them well enough for whatever reason. and now to this day i cannot listen to "since u been gone" or "havana" without flying off the fucking handle thinking about this injustice

28. name a song (or a few songs) that would need to be included in a movie about your life

following on from the previous ask's chat about me and my veritable fetish for Big Starting Over Moments, i think practically every era of my life has had at least one Big Starting Over Moment Song that i've taken on as my personal theme tune. of course, the combination of massive ambition and even more massive insecurity just means a lot of this is going to be family jewels era marina and the diamonds, and hand on heart, i think it's probably been about 10 years on the trot that i have viewed are you satisfied? as the overarching theme song of my life. you can really tell how much i'm going through it based on where this falls in my spotify wrapped each year (the higher the better, bc that means i'm at least daydreaming in earnest about getting out of a rut. it uh, did not feature last year.)

during my masters degree i discovered another song that fits this brief, and which i still absolutely adore, new mood by LPX. those opening guitars get me so instantly hyped every time

and FINALLY, a new entry, and a particularly brutal callout from the spotify algorithm - as mentioned i was listening to fires by nerina pallot for the first time the other day, and it was just slightly too short to cover my entire commute to work. which meant that as i was walking the final three minutes between the station and the church, the album radio threw this little gem at me, and i really felt right there and then like maddy euphoria realising this fucking play is about us

#not me being like i got too deep on this last set of answers. and immediately doing it again

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twyllodrus · 9 months ago

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dead boy detectives + ride the cyclone AU

like, say, the agency gets a new case in north-eastern saskatchewan, ppl report hearing music & singing once every year, at an abandoned warehouse of a theme park, on a specific day in september. with little digging, they find out there was an accident a while back involving a high school choir

for some reason the cyclone gang never moves on, so the agency arrives & so here are some headcanons for their interactions and agency's reactions to some of the songs:

the uranium suite, everyone's really creeped out/confused, except for niko who's vibing throughout the whole thing; at first the two groups don't realize they can see/speak to each other, but soon the cyclone kids find out that holy shit there are new people here hi hello heyy

everyone's excited about newcomers, ocean especially so, who quickly takes the initiative & so edwin defers to her as the group's leader (to noel's annoyance), and they attempt to work on solving the case together, it's all v civil. but then the talking part's over & the singing part of loop begins, so ocean performs what the world needs which does a total 180 on their encounter thus far & now everyone's high-key judging ocean; edwin gives a lecture on evils of social darwinism

noel's lament, noel right away clocks edwin as a repressed edwardian twink & sets out to put him in a coma with the whole monique routine. strangely the moment lipstick & lingerie come out it doesn't seem to faze edwin as much. but then noel also sees the way edwin sometimes looks at charles & so instead of mischa he pulls charles in for the kiss part, who cheerfully goes along with it, which nearly short-circuits edwin's brain (later on constance and niko get to gush together about two boys kissing). by the end of it everyone's dancing & being dramatic like they're the cast of cabaret on acid, except for edwin who's still digesting what's just happened

every story's got a lesson, everyone's still pissed at ocean, edwin incredulously wonders what was the lesson in being sacrificed to a demon & sent to hell at age 16

at first everyone's kinda cringing during this song is awesome, edwin is convinced this "autotune" is a modern tool used to commune with otherworldly entities, but eventually everyone gets into it; they all get sunglasses on, crystal gets edwin to wear a baseball cap backwards, everyone's having general fun

talia, charles is relived to learn that "the angriest boy in town", who could've been easily chalked up to being the toxic masculinity type dudebro, isn't like that at all (just mischa's whole monologue "i lay my masculinity at the altar of your maidenhood" gods). everyone gets to wear vyshyvankas & flower crowns. it's gorgeous

ricky potts unintentionally answers the age-old question of "is it actually possible to give a ghost an aneurysm?" the answer is yes, and space age bachelor man almost succeeds where the noel's lament failed. the moment horny cat people are in the mix, edwin is bombarded with cat king flashbacks and, later on, crystal "casually" mentions that they have met the actual cat king. ricky is super hype & asks lots of questions, giggling, twirling hair etc and also he totally called it that cats can talk but just choose not to

the ballad of jane doe, crystal hardcore relates to the dead decapitated girl, who doesn't know her own name or her past, or who her parents were and whom no one can identify too ("oh no soul, and no name, and no story, what a shame" like c'mon!)

jawbreaker/sugar cloud, everyone's gets a tad teary-eyed, but charles is openly weeping when constance lists all the random things in her life which she grew to appreciate only after the accident

in the end, they figure out the reason they couldn't move on is bc of virgil the rat who for some reason kept shutting karnak off prematurely, before the voting could begin. after figuring that out the voting proceeds as intended, but instead of one of them returning to the living world, they all get to move on. niko adopts virgil the rat

#dead boy detectives #ride the cyclone #edwin payne #edwin paine #charles rowland #crystal palace #niko sasaki #ocean o'connell rosenberg #noel gruber #mischa bachinski #ricky potts #jane doe #constance blackwood #virgil the rat #wonder what would charles' & edwin's catchphrases be if they were somehow part of the saint cassian mb smth like “brills“/”wait a tick”#:^) im just clowning dont mind me :^)

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xx-psych0-rabbit-xx · 11 months ago

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Character ask game:

Suzy 1, 2, 20, 25

Forgo 4, 9, 23, 25

Elfilin 1, 3, 14

Zan 1, 2, 14, 19, 20, 23

this feels like i finally got fed after three weeks oh my god the excitement is getting physical my throat hurts from breathing too fast AKHSKAHSKAJAK

susie!

1.why do you like or dislike this character?

i rlyyy like how susie is ultimately awful bc its for her benefit thats still fueled by a sympathetic reason i think that makes her extremely interesting.also shes so funny i love characters who r painfully teenage girlie feminine

2.favorite canon thing about this character?

"yippee!" said the susie after her seemingly successful revenge plan.extremely funny of her.

20.which other character is the ideal best friend for this character?

obligatory mention wave 3 in general all would get along w only mildly wanting to kill each other out of sheer annoyance.also i think you can pair susie w any of the other female characters n theyd get along great after a month of her having an obligatory one sided girl rivalry w them.ive said this before but i think you can put her in any 00s girl cartoon abt an overly feminine friend group n shed thrive in the new environment

25.what was your first impression of this character? how about now?

i was soooo hyped to play robobot bc she was cute n sounded extremely funny n ppl were mad she was too bad for reasons that sounded like double standards bs which is essentially like an arrow pointing me towards the character getting that kinda treatment 🩷

fecto forgo!

4.if you could put this character in any other media, what would you put in them?

i think we should throw it in invader zim i think itd have fun there.i already associate a lot of scenes between zim n gir w forgo n elfilin lmao

9.could you be roommates with this character?

yah i think we would get along well 🩷

23.favorite picture of this character?

COMPUTER PULL UP MY 100 NOTES FORGO POST

very nice. (credit)

25.what was your first impression of this character? how about now?

it was literally love at first sight my bestie wanted me to check the final boss song for katfl to tell her the vibes but the only upload was that video that only has like.inner code names for the songs so i missed elfilis n clicked chimera instead n was like oh holy shit this is MAD good!!! then she finally got to the end of the game n omg silly little revenge fetus 🩷🩷🩷 so silly 🩷🩷🩷 i love you 🩷🩷🩷

elfilin!

1.why do you like or dislike this character?

i think elfilin is cute n looks like a 00s deviantart oc n is extremely funny to bully.i wish i had smth big to say on him but hes just entertaining.lil guy.i wanna waterboard him for shit n giggles

3.least favorite canon thing about this character?

as i saiddd theres.not a lot to say on him?? thats the answer for the question btw theres just.not a lot to him other than some of his dialogue shows he has never been outside before.i feel? i dont own katfl but from reading summaries n the script it feels bc they RLY wanted the forgo elfilis lab split twist to be this huge secret thing elfilin ended up paying in just being a silly goodie two shoes amnesiac half.hes fine i like him! just.not a lot to the little man in comparison to modern kirb characters n even his twin.

14.assign a fashion aesthetic to this character

SOMEONE THROW HIM IN OLD 00S SCENE WEEB KID DEVIANTART HE NEEDS IT.HE NEEDS THE CARAMELLDANSEN HE NEEDS TO WATCH LUCKY STAR HE NEEDS TO TRACE BASES ON MS PAINT N MAKE KANDI BRACELETS

zan partizanne!

1.why do you like or dislike this character?

i think its v clear by now if a girl is mean n funny abt it i will immediately start stanning.check that.she has a little plot of being very attached to a figure who can be interpreted as a parental figure despite said figures mistreatment.check that.shes cute.check that.she laughs abt trying to kill someone.check that.her mental illness is severe.check that.shes yellow best color after pink.check that.she has the social skills of moldy cardboard in the "just seems angry n mean??" flavor.check that.well damn seems like she meets all my standards!

2.favorite canon thing about this character?

omggg what do i even chooseeeee her mean nicknames r so funny i love how they contrast she calls her sisters "darling franny and berge" but i also love how silly her attack names r.you got the coolest reference to a god n then "spell it w Z so it sounds cooler" "named after candy/rock music" but i alsooo love the severe tragedy of her relationship w hyness n her 50 mental disorders.the clinging to someone who cast her aside like a broken weapon.the clinging to an ideology that ends w a guaranteed paradise after being an inevitable willing death that was given to her by the one who saved her from her own attempt at ending her life.

but i also love shes such a little cutie pie <333 girlie pop laughs when trying to kill you n wanted to see a shooting star sooo badly (we ignore she harassed a child over this) (her awful behavior is an ideal coping mechanism to her inner turmoil! if we try giving her anything else shes gonna get mad or stare at the wall blankly for 20 minutes)

14.assign a fashion aesthetic to this character

i wish i could but frankly im not sure her closet is anything but 50 copies of her cult outfit like a cartoon characters.i think if you placed her in a fashion store she wouldnt know what to do too much choice n she doesnt want to wear anything else shes gonna get overwhelmed.its a miracle she owns a different hat by the time of that anniversary illustration.rip girl go get some boots w spikes or smth maybe youll feel better

19.how about a relationship they have in canon that you don't like?

BEATING HYNESS W 500 HAMMERS FOREVER N EVER GOD FUCKING DAMN IT GRANDPA!!! THIS RELATIONSHIP IS FUCKED!!! GET MY GIRL OUT OF HERE (dont i dont think shes functional outside of that cult before the end of the game i think shed die) (i have overthought hcs on the the mages feelings on the cult n theyre all fucked) SHES EMOTIONALLY LATCHED ON SOMEONE WHO HASNT LOVED HER IN YEARS.ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS NOT CHOOSE REVENGE ON A BUNCH OF PPL WHO PROBABLY ALREADY DIED OVER YOUR KIDS GRANDPA!!! dont get me started on how she acts abt excusing him in that one chapter of the second novel god FUCKING damn it i hate hyness hes so lucky shed be soooo happy to have him back to normal n alive that i let him live.also bc i dont think he earned death i am going to shove the consequences of his actions down his throat till he chokes.also fucked up to put a suicidal child in your death cult listen grandpa i know you genuinely loved her back then n believed this was good for her but still jesus dude.jesus.

20.which other character is the ideal best friend for this character?

i think flamberge n francisca r an instant obvious answer like i dont even have to explain it i think before hyness' corruption the trio was glued to each other most of the time

for some other answers i think shed get along well enough w taranza they probably go to the same therapist for like half the same issues.also for some reason this made me think of what a funny bad mess itd be to put taranza during/right after triple deluxe n zan during/right after star allies in the same room.christ theyd enable each others apologism for their shitty beloved leaders n enable each others self victim blaming so bad.

i am no longer legally allowed to mention susie n zan together but god knows i love yuri.

23.favorite picture of this character

TAKE ALL OF THE ONES I COULD IMMEDIATELY FIND ALL HER OFFICIAL ART IS SO GOOD I LOVE YOU BABY GIRL.MY.MY LITTLE MEOW MEOW.MY BELOVED CULT SKRUNKLY MY FAVORITE ABUSE APOLOGIST

#typing this gave me soooo much autistic joy i owe you my life...#mail

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edda-grenade · 1 year ago

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20 Questions for Fic Writers

thanks @inaconstantstateofchange for the tag!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

275k (damn, i hadn't realized it was that much overall)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

primarily dragon age (i've dipped into a few fandoms wrt fic writing over the years, but dragon age has been a mainstay for ages now)

and most recently, a for me unhinged amount of bg3

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

GET IT KIDS

The Common Tongue (Of You Loving Me)

Clean-Shaven

Slow Burn (that title is massively false advertising fyi)

Kintsugi

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i Want to respond to a lot more than i actually manage to do >.> unfortunately the comments that are super lovely and involved are often the ones where i get super intimidated about answering bc i want to make it a Good ReplyTM ^^'''

basically if you've ever written me a nice comment, be assured that i swooned over it, even if i never got the spoons together to reply

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Good Men, Fall To Dusk, hands down. p sure that's the only one that could qualify as an actual tragedy

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

oh hmmm. the majority of my fics tend to end happy overall, but i think Mirror on the Stage, Star to Star, Sun to Sun, and The Common Tongue (Of You Loving Me) are like… the most Joyful?

okay also honorable mention to Rites of Remembrance for having a very horny and very joyful ending XD

8. Do you get hate on fics?

so far, thankfully not! like, a handful of thoughtless comments over the years, but no Hate

(psa: "hey wouldn't it make more sense for this premise if you'd written a completely different fic instead" is a shit comment to give to anyone, alright)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

oh so much

a lot of kink and character/relationship-exploration-y stuff especially! and also i've been called the pegging monarch, so there's that XD

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

not really, i tend to have a million AUs instead XD i did write a tiny bit of the hobbit/pacific rim fusion fic ages ago on tumblr! that's probably a contender for the craziest one

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

i think so XD someone def asked if they could translate one, but off the top of my head i don't remember if they ever got around to it

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yep! once a few years ago, and more recently just So Much of the trio au

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

saar/solas <3 i've just accepted that they're my forever blorbos at this point (and yep to no one's surprise i did put them in bg3)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

the rest of the rites verse fics tbh. i still love my space cats, but whew. no more spark to write in that fandom

16. What are your writing strengths?

i write really good smut and really good horror 💪

also people keep telling me i'm p damn good at characterization, which is good bc to this day i feel like i'm making it up as i go along

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

semicolons em dashes run-on sentences my beloved

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

if you want to, go for it! granted, i'm coming at this mainly from a fantasy language perspective bc that's what tends to come up in what i write, and i'm v much a fan of picking apart fictional languages

19. First fandom you wrote for?

oh god that's lost to the ages. Might have been yu-gi-oh???

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

ohhh man HM. toss-up between The S͍̈́o͓̖̖̺͆ͩͣ̑ṋ̻̭̉͋͑g̓ͥ in the Halls and a matter of love, i think? song in the halls was the first time i Really wrote horror (and had SO MUCH FUN WITH IT), while matter of love is, uh. really fucking personal. it means a lot to me. so, yeah!

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raekensluver · 7 months ago

Text

shadows of the past

PART ONE, PART TWO, PART THREE

description: theodore nott had made only one promise to you. he would come back to you after the war. but how could you both be so sure he could come back?

pairing: ex boyfriend!death eater!theodore nott x fem!reader

contains: angst, breakup, mentions of theo being a death eater and the battle of hogwarts

song rec: anchor by: novo amor- "and i hear your ship is coming in, your tears a sea for me for me to swim."

w.c: 2.k (exactly?!)

an: i tried. this is my first 'official' time writing angst.....low key hope this destroys someone's heart bc then i've completed my desired goal. i would loveee some feedback (pls give me tips) !! i love reading your comments! (original title was broken promises)

the rain outside tapped a solemn rhythm against the window, mirroring the turmoil in your heart. your dorm room felt eerily empty without theo's presence. the comforting scent of his cologne mixed with cigarette smoke still lingered faintly on your pillow from when he would lay in bed with you. you sat cross-legged on the bed, your eyes fixed on the old photograph of you together. his arm was draped around your shoulders, his smile so wide that night, he would've denied it happened if it wasn't for the photographic proof. that was a time when your love had felt unwavering, a beacon in your life amidst the shadowy world of hogwarts.

but now, with the coldness of the room seeping into your very soul, you knew that was over. the silence was deafening, the distant echoes of your laughter and whispers now seemed like a distant memory.

your eyes filled with unshed tears as you remembered the last time you two had spoken. his voice, while laced with pain and regret, had said the words that had shattered your heart into a million pieces.

"i'm not good for you," he had murmured, his steel grey eyes reflecting the harrow you knew he felt. "i'm a death eater. i can't ask you to wait for me." but you had wanted to, you had promised to, no matter the consequences. the weight of his decision bore down on you like an invisible cloak, suffocating you with each breath you took.

the bed creaked softly as you lay down, your thoughts racing with scenarios of what you two could have been. if only he had believed in your shared love, in your future together. if only he hadn't pushed you away, thinking he was protecting you by doing so. your fingertips grazed the cold, empty space beside you, the reality of his absence hitting you like a wave of icy water. you missed his gentle touch, the way he would whisper sweet nothings into your ear, and the way his arms wrapped around you.

the moon outside your window cast a silver glow on the room, highlighting the tear-stained letters scattered across your desk. they were filled with his promises, his love, and his fears. each word had been written into the parchment as if he had bled them onto the page. you picked one up, reading the words you had committed to memory. his handwriting was messy, as if the letter was written in haste, but you cherished every loop and curve, every word that spelled out his love for you.

your eyes fell upon the last line, i will come back for you, i swear it. it was a vow you held onto with every fiber of your being, but doubt had started to creep in, whispering in the quiet moments of the night. would he really come back for you when the war was over, or would he be lost to the darkness forever? you didn't know the answer, but you knew you couldn't live without the hope that he would.

the door to your dorm room creaked open, and you spun around, expecting to see one of your friends, maybe pansy or even daphne to come to check on you. instead, you found yourself face-to-face with him. theo, drenched from the rain, his eyes dark with an intensity that made your stomach flip. he looked like he hadn't slept in days, the circles under his eyes a stark contrast to his pale skin.

for a moment, you just stared at each other, the air thick with unspoken words and the echoes of your shared past. you wanted to run to him, to throw your arms around him and tell him you didn't care about his choices, that you loved him regardless. but you knew that wasn't what he needed to hear. he had made his decision, and you had to respect it, even if it felt like your heart was being torn apart.

"theo," you managed to say, your voice barely above a whisper. he took a step into your dorm, his eyes never leaving yours. "what are you doing here?"

he closed the door softly behind him, his gaze searching your face as if he were memorizing every feature. "i had to see you," he said, his voice raw with emotion.

your heart pounded in your chest, a mix of anger and love warring within you. "why?" you asked, trying to keep your voice steady. "you made your choice. why come back now?"

theo took another step closer, his eyes never leaving yours. "i know what i said, but i can't bear the thought of you hating me, of you thinking i don't care." he reached out, his hand hovering near your cheek, but he didn't make contact. "i love you. i always will."

your breath hitched in your throat. you wanted so badly to believe him, to lean into his touch and let the warmth of his love envelop you again. but you knew the cost of such comfort. "theodore," you said, your voice shaking. "you're fighting for a cause that's tearing us apart. how can i be with you if you won't let me in?"

he took a deep breath, his hand dropping to his side. "i know," he said, the words heavy with regret. "but i had to try. to tell you that i'm sorry for everything, for the pain i've caused." his eyes searched yours, desperate for a spark of forgiveness. "i don't expect you to wait for me. i just wanted you to know that i never stopped caring."

the silence stretched between them, taut with unspoken emotions. you stepped closer, the rainwater from his cloak leaving a damp trail on the floor. "i don't hate you," you whispered, your voice shaking. "how could i? but i can't be with you, not like this."

theo's expression was a storm of pain and hope, his eyes never leaving yours. "i know," he said finally, his voice cracking. "but i had to tell you. i couldn't live with the lie anymore."

"lie?" you echoed, your own eyes filling with tears. "what lie?"

he took another step closer, the rain still dripping from his hair. "the lie that i don't love you, that i don't miss you every second of every day." his hand reached out, tentatively, and brushed a strand of hair away from your face. the warmth and familiarity of his touch sent a shiver down your spine. "the lie that i'm okay without you."

your eyes searched his, looking for any sign of deceit, but all you found was the raw truth. you resolve wavered, the weight of his words like a spellbinding charm. "teddy," you murmured, your voice cracking. "you're breaking my heart all over again."

he stepped closer, the gap between you now only a whisper of space. "i never wanted to hurt you," he said, his voice hoarse with emotion. "but i can't change who i am, or what i've done. i just needed you to know that it wasn't because i didn't love you enough."

your heart felt as though it might shatter at any moment. "i know," you said, your voice barely audible. "but that doesn't make it any easier."

theo stepped closer, the warmth of his body bleeding into you. "i know," he repeated, his breath ghosting over your lips. "but i had to come back, to tell you one last time."

your eyes searched his, looking for any sign of doubt or regret, but all you found was a deep, unwavering love. you felt your own purpose crumbling, the desire to be in his arms again almost too much to bear. "what if the war never ends?" you whispered, your voice trembling. "what if we're forced to be like this forever?"

theo's expression softened, and he cupped your face in his hands. "then we'll find a way to be together," he said, his thumbs brushing away the tears that clung to your lashes. "i'll do anything to make this right."

he leaned in, his forehead resting against yours, his breath warm against your skin. "i can't just walk away from you without telling you how much you mean to me."

your eyes searched his, the grey of his irises swirling with a tempest of emotions. "what happens when you leave?" you asked, your voice thick with unshed tears.

he sighed, his hands dropping to his sides. "i don't know," he admitted, his eyes never leaving yours. "but i had to come back, to see you one last time."

your breath caught in your throat as you felt the gravity of his words. "one last time?" you asked, your heart aching.

theo nodded solemnly. "i can't promise you anything more than that," he said, his voice heavy with regret. "but i needed to tell you before…" he trailed off, unable to finish the sentence.

your eyes searched his, the depth of his pain reflected in your own. "theo," you breathed, your voice shaking. "you can't just leave me like this."

he closed his eyes, a tear slipping down his cheek. for the first time ever, you watched him cry.

"i'm sorry," he whispered. "i never wanted to cause you pain." He opened his eyes again, looking into yours with a fierce determination. "but i have to go back. i have to fight."

your eyes searched his, desperation and love clashing within you. "but why?" you choked out. "what if you don't come back?"

theo's expression tightened, and he took a step back, the distance between you two now unbridgeable. "then you'll know i did everything i could," he said, his voice steady despite the pain etched on his features. "but i have to believe that there's a future for us, even if it's just a glimmer."

your eyes searched his, desperation clinging to every word. "what if there isn't?" you choked out, your voice barely a whisper.

theo's expression was a mix of pain and determination. "then i'll have fought for it," he said, his voice firm. "i'll have done everything in my power to make it right." he paused, his eyes drifting to the photograph on the bed. "i have to try."

your eyes followed his gaze, the image of your happier times now a stark reminder of the chasm that had grown between you. "i don't want that," you said, your voice breaking. "i want you here, with me."

theodore's expression was a whirlpool of love and pain. "i want that too," he whispered. "but i can't ignore the path i've been destined to take." He took one last, lingering look at her, his eyes drinking in every detail of your face. "remember me," he murmured, "if i dont come back to see you. remember me, as i am now. not as the monster everyone makes me out to be."

your heart felt like it was being torn in two as you watched him turn and walk away. you wanted to call out, to beg him to stay, but the words lodged in your throat. as he reached the door, he paused, his hand on the knob. he looked back at you, his eyes filled with a sadness so intense it was almost palpable.

"i'm fighting for a world where we can be together," he said, his voice low and earnest. "where our love isn't tainted by the choices i've made." his gaze held yours for a moment longer, the unspoken promise in his eyes almost too much to bear. "i have to go," he murmured, his hand tightening around the doorknob. "but i'll come back for you."

his words hung in the air like a shattered dream, and you knew that no matter what you said, he would not be swayed. his path was set, and you could only watch as he opened the door and stepped into the corridor, the rain outside beckoning him back to the storm he had chosen.

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crispy-chan · 3 years ago

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a guide how to not f*ck over your writers

hello, i am joining the bandwagon with my own two cents on how tumblr interactions have gone from shit to lower shit.

first of all, let me just stress how much i appreciate readers who interact with fanfics. you guys are the true mvp's and i applaud you for doing god's work. (also let's be real a significant portion of those readers are fic writers themselves).

second of all, i want to say that i'm not trying to be “ungrateful” or sound like a prick, i just see so many writers leave this site because they feel unappreciated, alone or they think that nobody enjoys the fics they work hard on.

honestly, there were/are times where i think if this is even worth it. i get so much enjoyment from this, it's a hobby that allows me to be creative, to escape reality and have a little fun. yet i feel like what i'm doing is just good for nothing since it seems like people are allergic to me on this site.

it truly means a lot to us when you guys interact. it doesn't even have to be much, just a short comment, but it can still make our day

now onto the ways you can support your fave writers:

1. interact with the fics -- comment, reblog, send asks. trust me, you can't go wrong with this one. don't be afraid to send an incoherent wordspill or type out that essay in caps lock where you go nuts about your favorite scenes, comment on the characters and their development or compliment the author's writing style. again, i guarantee you'll receive answers that are similarly incoherent as the author tries to not lose their shit bcs what the fuck? someone is finally interacting with my stories

2. recommendations -- you can rec fics to networks for various events, send your recs to your moots or maybe even to fic rec accounts who accept recommendations. even by reblogging - you're already basically doing this. it can make our day when we see that someone recommended something we worked on to someone else :)

3. interaction -- usually, most authors on here wouldn't mind more asks that don't even have to be about fics. you can ask how their day was, talk to them about a favorite book/movie/song literally whatever. i feel like i don't really have much to say on this topic cause i don't really get these types of asks :} but yeah, i think most of us would feel really touched if people wanted to talk to us outside of our writings. note: if you're shy, you can go on anon :> it's there for a reason :P

4. criticism -- now be careful - this one is tricky. you should first make sure if the person is okay with you giving some constructive criticism. if it isn't mentioned anywhere on their page/at the bottom of their fic, just ask. i for one wouldn't mind hearing things like “just a suggestion but i think you could work on your descriptions more” or “be careful - you often use the same words in one paragraph” etc.

lastly, i wanted to stress that you shouldn't force yourself per se to do these. nobody wan't your feedback if it isn't genuine. i just feel like people think “oh well if i won't comment, i'm sure somebody else will-” bullshit! that's the problem here. this mindset is what has to change. if you want the writing community to not wither into dust, you'll have to give something. in this case it's interactions and feedback.

i won't go into the details of how long it takes to write but as someone who writes primarily long fics, i can tell you it's extremely time consuming. and i spent the past fifteen minutes typing this post instead of working on yellow wood @_@

so yeah, this is a desperate cry from me. i'm hoping that if you're a silent reader/serial liker who doesn't leave feedback, you'll learn something new here. thank you for reading so far and i hope you have a lovely day <3

#i'm just.... tired #writeblr #stray kids imagines #kpop imagines #stray kids fluff #bts imagines #bts fanfiction #skz #ateez imagines #kpop scenarios #sorry for dumping those in the tags i just want this to reach people #stray kids smut #bang chan x reader #hyunjin x reader #lee felix x reader

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streamafterlaughter · 2 years ago

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New Kid

gif credit

Chapter XIII: That Time of Year

masterlist | chapter XII | playlist

summary: winter break is finally starting to feel like just that, a break. You and your closest friends enjoy the Hawkins festivities to the best of your abilities.

tags: FLUFFY FLUFF FLUFF!!!!! some minor angst, mentions of parental abandonment, gn!reader, idiots in love, basically all just filler and tying loose ends these next few chapters. hang on tight y’all

a/n: cute lil chapter that made me happy to write. i hope u enjoy it! 1985 is almost over, and so is this fic. it’s getting really difficult to write tho bc i don’t wanna say goodbye!!! Disclaimer: I do not give permission to have my work reposted on other sites. Reblogs are more than welcome, but please inform me if you find my work elsewhere unless otherwise stated.

Eddie’s POV

He’s hunched over his desk that’s been haphazardly wiped clean, his tongue sticking out the corner on his mouth as he sketches. The idea came to him in a dream, the first night in a long time you hadn’t been sleeping next to him. He dreamt of you on stage, but instead of The Hideout, you were ten feet above him in front of a crowd of thousands. He hasn’t recognized the song, he’s never heard you play an original, but the energy of the dream made him feel electric.

He pulls the marker up again, leaning back to see the drawing: a silhouette of two people, hands clasped as they spin, surrounded by fire. He leans back down, fixing a few lines before finally standing up. “It’s done!” He announces.

“Lemme see!” Dustin pushes off the bed, and Steve follows him closely. The two hover over the desk, inspecting Eddie’s creation.

“Eddie, this is great! Y/n’s gonna love it!” Dustin beams, and Eddie gives him a small smile.

“I uh, I don’t get it. Why are they on fire?” Steve cocks his head, like a different angle will answer his question.

Dustin sighs. “Must we explain everything to you? Y/n’s band is called Death Dance, Approximately. They’re dancing, they’re almost dying. It’s pretty clear.”

“Dustin, don’t use that tone with your father.” Eddie chastises, shoving the boy playfully.

“Oh! Okay, that makes sense.” Steve rests his hands on his hips, still looking like he doesn’t get the illustration.

“So,” Eddie claps his hands together, startling his friends. “Christmas is days away, what’s the plan?”

“Figured we could watch movies at Mike’s? Binge eat cookies and eggnog, exchange some presents, eh?” Dustin suggests, the glee readable in his expression.

Eddie turns to Steve. “And after, when the children are sound asleep in their beds dreaming of sugar plums or some shit?”

Steve shrugs. “We can go back to Y/n’s, spike the eggnog?”

“Sweet.”

“Now, though, we have a snowball war to win!” Dustin pulls his cap down, preparing to face the cold.

“To the forts!” Eddie declares, and reaches for his leather jacket.

—

Your POV

You and Robin pull into the parking lot of the Hawkins High soccer field, wrapped in layers of coats and carrying a giant thermos of hot cocoa. The boys have a snowball fight planned, and you have been tasked with snack duty.

“These kids go all out, huh?” As you enter the field, you take in the war zone before you. Two forts are already built, giant mounds of snow surrounded by bright orange cones meant for scrimmages. Eddie, Steve, and Dustin are shaping snowballs on the far side of the field, while Lucas, Will, Erica, and Mike huddle together to strategize.

“Oh, yeah. You get a bunch of DND nerds together, they’ll take any opportunity to make something usually mundane, supremely dramatic.” Robin crosses her arms over her chest, trying to shield herself from the cold as the two of you approach Max, Eleven, Jonathan, and Nancy on the bleachers.

“Status report?” You ask, spreading out a blanket on the metal bench behind the couple.

“Will has been wounded twice, Eddie is treating the whole thing like a campaign, and Steve still has terrible aim.” Nancy reports, as if she’s writing an article on the battle of Bunker Hill.

“Mike is dead.” El adds, and you can’t help but chuckle at her nonchalance.

You pass the thermos to Nancy. As she accepts, you hear the familiar maniacal laughter of your boyfriend. You look up just in time to watch him hurl a snowball, hitting Lucas square in the chest. “AHA! BOW BEFORE YOUR DUNGEON MASTER!” Eddie turns to strut back to his post when another flying sphere nails him between the shoulders. The culprit, his victim’s own sister, avenging Lucas’s death. “I- I’ve been hit. Please, before I go,” Eddie begins, his voice taking a similar cadence to how you’d imagine a Shakespeare play being performed. “Tell Y/n, tell them,” You’ve had enough of the sidelines. You leap from your seat, abandoning your blanket and speeding down the bleachers, the cold wind sharp against your face.

“Tell me what, darling?” You call, falling to your knees beside your fake dying boyfriend. The snow seeps into your jeans, for you didn’t prepare for participating, and clasp his hand in your glove.

“Y/n! I must be dead, I must have died, did she tell you? Did Lady Applejack pass along the message?”

You try not to giggle, wanting to continue the dramatization Eddie’s created. “You haven’t left yet! Please, do share what you wish to say!”

Eddie inhales sharply, as if the words he wants to say are causing him pain. “Avenge me, Y/n. Avenge my death. Avenge our love. Please, don’t let me die for nothing!” He exclaims before pretending to take his very last breath. You sniffle, wiping away a very real tear caused by the cold, and rise from his limp body.

“You.” Your voice deepens. You stand slowly, ready to retreat to the fort where Steve and Dustin frantically form a stack of snowballs. Erica’s eyes widen as you straighten, standing over her like a mother would her disciplined child. “You will pay for this, Applejack.”

Erica takes a step back toward her fort, the snow crunching under her boot. “We’ll see about that.” She turns on her heel and sprints before you can grasp at the snow.

—

Eddie’s POV

After what feels like days of throwing snowballs, the Realm of Darkness and the Village of Wisdom finally come to a truce. You say a silent thank you to the universe, as you’ve begun to lose feeling in your toes.

You transport the kids to their respective households before backtracking to Eddie’s trailer with the rest of your friends. You’ve snagged a corner of the couch, wrapped in a big, fuzzy blanket. Steve and Robin sit on the floor against the couch, while Nancy and Jonathan have split the space of Wayne’s recliner. Eddie plugs the Gremlins tape into the machine, and takes his place beside you on the couch. You let him untuck your feet, sliding his own into the warmth of the fleece.

“Wanna little extra warmth?” Eddie offers you his flask, a mischievous smile on his rosy face, and you nod. He pours about two shots’ worth of vodka into your mug, then offers it to Steve. The flask makes its way around the room, and the six of you drink and talk as the movie plays behind you. Eddie feels his heart warming as he sips, the alcohol induced sentimentality taking him into a warm embrace. You’re snuggled into his side, and he can feel every time your body shakes with laughter at something someone else says. The trailer hasn’t always been a place of warmth, but tonight, Eddie feels at home.

—

Your POV

The days leading up to Christmas Eve are filled with holiday extravagance. Your mother insists on taking pictures with Santa, just like every year before, even though you’re a fully grown adult. You and your father pick out a tree, a tiny pine with sparse needles, because even ugly trees need love. You leave Mike’s early to set up for the more “adult” Christmas party, taking extra time to make holiday themed alcoholic beverages.

Your friends arrive at your house at eight sharp on Christmas Eve eve, which you and Eddie have dubbed Freaksgiving. He carries his armfuls of presents, insisting he doesn’t need help, while the rest of your friends trail behind him, one or two gifts in each of their grasps.

Eddie rings the bell, and you open the door to greet the rest of what you consider family, the warm air wafting from inside, smelling of cinnamon. You’d declared a rule: for everyone to wear the ugliest holiday sweater they could find. Yours is a cardigan, green and red with fleece polar bears stitched on each side, clinking glasses of eggnog. You chuckle at the collection before you: Eddie’s is blue with a caricature of Jesus with an eggnog mustache that says “Happy Birthday, Big Huy!” Robin’s has a drunk Mrs. Clause on hers with Every damn year stitched in bright yellow, Nancy’s is covered in bells, and Jonathan’s lights up.

“Welcome!” You present the living room to them, covered in warm white string lights, your ancient fireplace crackling with a strengthening flame. You personally despise holiday music, opting instead to play a mix of your friends’ favorite songs. Running Up That Hill by Kate Bush hums softly in the background as Eddie scoops you into his arms, wrapping himself around you like you’re the best gift of the night. “Help yourselves to drinks, and there are cookies in the kitchen! We’ll do presents once everyone’s situated.” You feel good, hosting. You are excited to make your friends feel extra loved today, a holiday that usually makes you sad to celebrate.

Eddie picks a chocolate chip cookie off the serving tray, and closes his eyes as he bites into it. “Babe, these are delicious!”

“Be careful, love! The chocolate chip ones are, um, extra special!” You giggle, and Robin’s eyes widen.

“Did you put drugs in these?!” She bites into her own chocolate chip dessert.

“Not drugs plural! Just a little weed!” You snicker, and pick up your own cookie. Nancy and Steve follow suit, and Jonathan takes two.

Eddie’s POV

“Alright!” You announce, quieting the babbles of surrounding conversation. You catch Eddie’s attention, and he looks at you in awe. The holidays have never been good to him. He’s never had the money to get presents for his friends, and even if he did, he’d never had friends to celebrate with. Beyond that, the holidays were a reminder of how alone he’d always felt, watching everyone leave to visit family, or have warm houses to welcome guests with home cooked meals and thoughtful presents.

Eddie feels a tap on his shoulder, and spins to greet you, holding out a small rectangular present for him. “It’s a little rough, but I did my best.” You say, shyly looking at his nose while you speak. He grins, eagerly taking the gift from you, replacing it in your hands with his own poorly wrapped, flimsy present.

“You first.” He gestures, and you tear the paper swiftly, unraveling the sparkly ribbon to reveal his creation. Death Dance, Approximately is written in capital, jagged letters across the top of the shirt, over a couple meant to vaguely look like you and Eddie, holding hands as orange flames erupt around them. You hold the shirt up to examine it, and you’re grinning ear to ear. “You like it?” Eddie asks, feeling the nerves in his stomach.

“I love it! It’s so beautiful, you drew this?”

Eddie nods. “Figured you deserved your very own band shirt. Soon you’ll be selling out of these at shows.” You pounce on him as he says it, wrapping your legs around his waist.

“Thank you, Eddie. So much.” You muffle into his hair, and he chuckles. “Open yours!” You explain, once you’ve removed yourself from his torso.

“Okay, okay!” By now, everyone’s gathered around you and Eddie, waiting expectantly to see the gift you’d come up with. Robin grins eagerly, Steve pokes his head over Eddie’s shoulder, and Nancy watches Jonathan ready his camera.

Eddie peels the paper away, tossing it to the floor to reveal the cassette. “Pretty Boy.” He reads to himself, and he can feel his ears warming. “Can I play it?”

You nod, your face blushing bright red. Eddie walks over to your radio, and pops the tape in. It begins with your tender introduction, before sliding into the song you’d written for him. Eddie closes his eyes, focusing on the sound of your voice, singing only for him. The rasp in your voice gives him chills, and the lyrics pull at his heartstrings like they’re made of rubber. He feels the vibrations in his chest, and the pricks of tears welling in his eyes. He still can’t believe it’s for him, that you’d written and recorded a whole song, a love song, just for him.

Your POV

You watch Eddie closely as the song ends, and he finally opens his eyes. Steve holds his face in his hands, and Robin claps giddily as the final chord rings out. Nancy says something, but you don’t hear her over the nervous buzzing in your brain.

“Y/n,” Eddie says finally, taking a step closer to you. You look up to meet his eyes, and you watch as they twinkle with happy tears. “This is all I ever could have asked for, and more.” He lets out a breathy laugh and shakes his head. “You wrote that for me? Seriously?!”

You nod vigorously, taking a step in his direction. “You’re my muse, I guess.” You chuckle.

It must have struck a chord with Eddie, because he’s suddenly running at you, and hoisting you into the air like a rag doll. “You’re fucking incredible!” He exclaims, and your friends all murmur in agreement. “Merry Christmas, love of mine.”

The rest of the gifts are exchanged with ease. You receive a studded belt from Robin, a new denim jacket from Steve, a copy of Ariel by Sylvia Plath from Nancy, and a leather bound journal from Jonathan. You spend the rest of the night watching Christmas specials in your pajamas, the fire slowly dying as the night comes to a close.

You say your goodbyes to your friends around midnight, waving them off in their vehicles while Eddie stays behind to help you clean up. “I’d say that was a success!” You declare, closing your front door behind Jonathan, and flicking the porch light off.

“Best celebration I’ve had, though that’s not saying much.” Eddie slides the cookies into a tupperware, and places the plate into the dishwasher.

You frown at his words. “What do you mean?”

He sighs, turning to you with a sad smile. “The holidays are hard. They’re usually lonely, Wayne and I never visit the family, we aren’t welcome anymore.”

You take a few steps toward your boyfriend, reaching your arms out for him. He meets you in the middle, letting you wrap yourself around his waist. “You’re always welcome here, we’re having a family dinner tomorrow. I'd love to have you and Wayne over.” You look up to examine his reaction. “Why aren’t you welcome? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“My mom left when I was a kid. Couldn’t take the way dear ole dad treated us, and didn’t have the means to take me with her. She promised me she’d come back, and she used to send me letters every year. My dad would hide them, get rid of them, whatever, so she stopped writing. Turns out, his family sided with him, even after I tried to tell them what he’d done to us. They blame me for the way he is, and they don’t like Wayne because he chose me over them. Good riddance.” He seems to have convinced himself, but you see right through the hard shell. He misses his family, and it stings to hear him talk so sadly about them.

“Eddie,” You whisper, not wanting to stir the air too much. “You know it’s not your fault, right?”

He meets your eyes, his own still set in the sad puppy expression you’ve come to adore. His smile falters, though. “Im never gonna believe that. But enough about me, huh? I wanna come tomorrow, truly, but… is your grandmother coming?”

“Yeah,” you sigh, letting him change the subject for now. “unfortunately. But I’ll have my dad talk to her, I'm not gonna let her ruin the holiday.”

“I promise to behave. I can’t speak for Wayne, though.” He kisses your forehead, turning back to the dishes, humming his song under his breath. “I can’t believe you wrote this.” Eddie muses, and you aren’t sure you hear him right. “I mean, I can. I definitely can, but for me, I mean.” His cheeks turn red.

“Why not?” You frown, trying not to let the words hurt your heart.

“I’m still not really used to this whole thing where I’m in love, I guess.”

Your frown deepens and you step closer to him, feeling the warmth radiating from his tense body. He watches you, frozen against the kitchen counter. “Well get used to it, Munson. You’re stuck with me for the foreseeable future.” You lift yourself onto your toes and plant a kiss on his pouty lips. “Now let’s go upstairs so I can show you just how special you are.”

chapter xiv

taglist @children-of-the-grave @five-bi-five @wiildflower-xxx @beebeerockknot @champagne-glamour || send a message to be added🫶

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