#i hope this was worth...anything to someone

[grimmsbride]

▒ ❀ ̭͡⠀ ❛ SOME ENCOURAGEMENT. NAM-GYU / PLAYER 124

nam-gyu attempts to recruit beloved, timid reader into thanos’s world. all it takes is a little encouragement.

𖥔 ࣪˖ TAGS, nam-gyu is a little pushy (but everything is consensual between him and reader) | unconsensual voyuerism (again everyone is asleep but i don’t wanna make anyone uncomfortable) | ooc characters (first time writing for nam-gyu) | minor degradation & praise (+humiliation(?)) | use of the words slut, good girl, etc. | fingering | minor dacryphilia | just a silly little imagine | nam-gyu is lowkey manipulative | reader is a freak with a thing for fingers/hands | etc.

𖥔 ࣪˖ NOTES, writing smut on company time is actually hilarious, idk why i got this idea during work. but anywho — i hope you enjoy, i tried my hand at his character. as always please ignore any grammar mistakes or typos.

Imagine Nam-Gyu attempting to recruit someone without the advice of his beloved purple-haired leader. Surprising, right? Despite his own issues with inferiority; the ex-club worker just seems to follow behind Thanos like a hungry puppy desperate for a bone— or drugs, for that matter. But no, just this once, Nam-Gyu takes the lead. The numbers are growing closer and even more scarce, fear lacing people’s minds and causing them to hit that dreaded X button. Thanos’s World’s dream is to continue the games to pay off their debts, right?— so it only made sense for Nam-Gyu to turn an X over to the O side.

He couldn’t just pick anyone. Someone far too strong-willed would definitely tell him no, and someone far too weak would just be a curse rather than a blessing.

Who to choose.. Who to choose..

Soon enough the man’s eyes are locking on to you— a contestant he has seen around, yet hasn’t heard much from. Not only were you easy on the eyes but you just seemed like the perfect person to shape into a worthy teammate.

Within minutes he’s approaching you, an easy-going smile in place as your name falls from his lips. Nam-Gyu had heard it said before by someone close to you, another random that he hadn’t bother to think about.

“Yes..?” Your words are slow, lips pursing as you take in the man before you. You were beyond nervous; this was the lackey of that purple-haired lunatic after all. Watching the two fight on the very first day was enough to tell you to avoid them at all costs. Yet here you were, a few feet away from one of them, under his gaze that trailed over you like a pretty piece of jewelry behind a display case.

You couldn’t help but bring your hands closer to yourself, teeth dragging across your cheek nervously.

From your head to your toes, Nam-Gyu’s eyes soon landed on that big red patch residing just under your bosom. With a breathy chuckle he reached over, allowing a single finger to press and trace the X.

“You wanna get out of the games that bad, huh? You voted X twice already.”

Your eyes flicked down to his hand, before traveling back to his face. “Yeah well..” You dragged slowly, watching that harsh gaze return to your features.

“I—I want to get rid of my debts.. but putting my life on the line for it just seems..” You hoped you got your words across perfectly, even without continuing your sentence. Sure, it was hard being hounded for your debts, but death looming over your head just didn’t seem worth it.

Still, Nam-Gyu only shook his head at you, a sigh full of pity escaping his lips.

“Well, that’s where you’re messing up.” Nam-Gyu hummed, stepping just a bit closer, finger still tracing that damned patch. Your attention kept flicking between his face and finger, wondering why exactly warmth was pooling throughout your entire body.

“Worrying too much about dying is what’s gonna get you killed, not anything else.”

Your eyebrows knitted close, a look of confusion plastered across your face. Worrying seemed like the right way to keep yourself alive.. right? Not worrying just seemed, well— stupid. Not that you would say that to his face, obviously.

“I have to disagree..”

Just barely did you hear the sound of the man sucking his teeth, watching the way his face turned to the side, clearly searching for his next few words. You debated on walking away from this conversation, it was clear what his objective was. And whether ordered by Thanos or not, you didn’t really want to know— nor figure out.

Yet for some reason you were practically glued to the spot, blinking up at him and waiting oh, so patiently for his next spiel. And as you watched his face turn back to you, your breath got caught in your throat.

“Okay then.. worry all you want, but you wouldn’t you want someone to look out for you?” Nam-Gyu’s other hand was reaching to your patch at this point, using both thumbs to trace it. “Being on this side, there’s no unity.. it’s every person for themself.”

The two of you locked eyes, a sickeningly sweet smile crossing his face.

“Come with us, and we’ll look after you. I’ll personally see to it too.”

Slowly did your teeth sink into your bottom lip, struggling to maintain the eye contact that he seemed so keen on keeping. The only thing you could hear was your racing heart and the gentle sounds of his thumbs sliding across that red patch. His words were.. tempting. You wondered if he rehearsed what to say, like a video game with multiple endings; did he have it all figured out before he even walked over? Was he so prepared to convert you, using every rejection you had as some silly obstacles the man easily hobbled over?

So caught up in your thoughts, you hardly realized Nam-Gyu had gotten even closer until his breath fanned across your ear in a simple;

I’ll let you think it over, let’s talk again later..

When you thought of later, you initially believed in thirty mins or so. Maybe this time he would bring over his beloved leader to really get the point across. But no, later seemed to be during lights out; when you all should be sleeping, tucked away in the rare bliss these murderous games brought.

And the only talking that was happening was the soft words Nam-Gyu continued to whisper into your ear and the even softer moans of passion that slipped from your swollen lips.

See, Nam-Gyu wasn’t an idiot despite what Thanos seems to think. Quickly he caught on to two things whilst speaking to you.

The first being, you were quite cute when nervous. And two, you just loved looking at his hands.

So what better way to really stretch his point across but using his beloved fingers to stretch you open just how he liked?

“Should have done this from the start, look how cooperative you’re being..” The smile on Nam-Gyu’s face was permanent at this point, the corner of his mouth twitching with each pitiful moan you released. His rings were tossed lazily to the side, his bare fingers now pushing into your sloppy cunt so perfectly. Longer then your own, they pushed and prodded; opening you up and rubbing against your soaked walls. With each breath you were clenching, causing the smile on his face to only grow deeper.

“Scared of dying but not of some stranger finger-fucking you, huh? What a joke.”

You wanted to tell him off, how he was so mean and so wrong. But you couldn’t, not with how your mind was getting complete lost from his movements. Your teeth were grinding into your bottom lip, a metallic taste filling your mouth as time progressed. Deep moans thundered from your throat, muffled by your harsh biting. You couldn’t imagine having your little recruitment interrupted by some poor contestant just trying to get some rest.

But with the way Nam-Gyu was practically ruining you, it didn’t seem he cared much either way. He was so hellbent on coaxing you, his lips right against your ear as that damned thumb came and circled your swollen bud.

“I told you I’d look after you right, where’s my thank you?”

Your eyes widened the moment his free hand rose, pushing at your cheeks and basically forcing your lips to part. The sound you let out was a strangled mix of a moan and gasp, quickly clasping your own hand against your mouth.

Nam-Gyu chuckled on his breath, thrusting a third finger into your wet cunt as he spoke; “What? You scared of the other contestants realizing how much of a slut you are? Shouldn’t worry too much; this messy cunt is making enough noise for you.”

Your eyes were meeting the back of your skull, so fucking mean he was— yet you couldn’t help but enjoy the attention. His digits were curling inside, brushing across that special spot that caused you to shake. Your thighs were clenching harshly around his arm, rushed breaths escaping as your chest rose and fell.

“Th—thank you.. fuck— please…!” You whimpered as softly as you possibly could, glossy eyes staring up at the man. You felt accomplished the moment he drew closer, feeling the cold metal of his chain brush against your heated skin before a gentle kiss was pressed right against your cheek.

“What a good girl.. You wanna come, hm?” The hand was lowering to your throat, fingers simply wrapping around it yet not squeezing. Nam-Gyu watched in pure enjoyment at the way your head tossed back and forth in a rushed nod; how needy you were for him. What a palpable little thing, is what he thought.

“I can make that happen, you just gotta do something for me.”

More words, whispered, tempting; drifting right into your ear and hitting the same pleasurable spots right between your legs. Speaking of, you felt your peak drawing closer; a tight band resting deep in your tummy— ready to burst.

You knew what he wanted, you weren’t an idiot nor were you too fucked out to forget. Your mind was screaming at you, telling you an orgasm wasn’t worth pressing that cursed button.

Yet, for now, you weren’t thinking with your brain, but with your pussy instead.

“P—please let me join! I’ll press the button— I promise!” Another whisper-yell escaped you, desperation clinging to every word as they fled those pretty lips.

With that final confirmation Nam-Gyu was quickening the pace of his fingers, eating up the way your body convulsed, a lost look invading your eyes as you came undone. Your essence trickled down his fingers all the way to his wrist, a sticky residue that he would make sure you clean up later.

For now.. his hand rose from your throat to instead cup your cheek, rubbing his thumb right under your eye so tenderly— so sweetly.

“I knew you could do it.. just needed some encouragement, right?”

[yuikomorii]

AYAYUI IDOL AU: Chapter 2

// It’s time for the second chapter! This one focuses more on the conversations with other characters than on Ayayui interactions, but I’m really curious to see if anyone can guess who the second Diaboy to meet Yui will be. 👀

This story isn’t meant to be a harem or anything like that though, but all the Diaboys will meet Yui at some point. I hope you enjoy this chapter until the next one! 💖

Chapter 1

Place: Dorms

Ayato: Good night.

Laito: Nighty night~!

— Ayato enters his room —

Laito: ( Hmm… he seems unusually quiet. He hasn’t said a single word the entire way, which is so unlike him. )

( It’s as if something’s weighing on his mind, that he’s deliberately keeping to himself. )

( Something must have surely happened to him when he went outside, but why won’t he say anything? That’s weird… )

— stretches and yawns —

Anyway, there’s no point in overthinking it. As long as it doesn’t damage his and our reputation, it’s not worth worrying about.

Place: Ayato’s room

Ayato: ( Phew, I managed to slip into my bed without waking Shu up. )

( The last thing I needed was a lecture about sneaking off to the club as an idol and nearly getting caught. )

( Haa… what a mess. I really made a fool of myself today, didn’t I? )

( If it weren’t for that girl, I’d probably be in the hospital right now, all over the news for alcohol poisoning. )

( Man, that would’ve totally wrecked my career… )

???: Heh, where have you been?

Ayato: …!

( Was that—)

O-Oi, you’re not sleeping!?

Shu: I was until a certain someone tripped over the WI-FI cable and woke me up.

Ayato: ( Fuck! )

Shu: But whatever, I answered your question, so now it’s your turn to answer mine.

— opens one eye and looks at him —

Ayato: ( Wait… I could just make something up and play it off as the truth! )

( Heh, exactly! There’s no way he’d be able to tell it’s a lie! )

Just practicing. I want to be the best version of myself for the next concert, y’know?

Shu: Hmm… I see.

And now, what’s the real answer?

Ayato: …!?

( How did he— )

Hah? W-What do you mean? I’m telling the truth!

— Shu opens both eyes and looks at him —

Shu: You went there, didn’t you?

Ayato: …!

( This guy… he can see through me! )

How the hell did you know that I went to the night club!?

Shu: Heh~? So I was right after all. You really did go there, huh?

Ayato: ( You… You fucking tricked me! )

Look, I know I’m not the best at keeping things together, but don’t tell Reiji! I beg you!

If the leader finds out, the staff will know, and once the CEO hears, I’m done! He’ll fire me in a heartbeat, no questions asked!

Shu: You’re overreacting. No idol is gonna get fired for just going to a night club.

Ayato: Man, you just don’t get it! It’s not just about going there— it’s what went down while I was there!

Shu: Oh? Now you’ve got me curious. What exactly happened?

— starts piping —

Ayato: ( Why do I keep getting myself in this!? )

( Haa… but I guess there’s no point in running away from my issues anymore. )

Basically, I was very tired and thought of over drinking to get my mind think of something else, but the alcohol and exhaustion made a really bad combination, so my chest started aching.

I went outside to get some air, but the pain just kept getting worse until this random chick found me and gave me her water bottle.

Shu: Wait… so you got caught?

Ayato: Luckily, no! As crazy as this sounds, she didn’t recognize me.

Heck, she even asked for my name after I called her a cab! But of course, I’m not that dumb. I knew it would have been way too risky to tell her my name.

( Honestly, I don’t even know why I was so anxious about it. In the end, everything worked out just fine, and I bet that girl will forget all about it in a few hours anyway. )

Shu: Hmm… you do realize that might have merely been an act, don’t you?

Ayato: Huh? What do you mean…?

Shu: Women are sly as foxes.

They’ll play all innocent and clueless, behaving like they have no idea what’s going on, but in reality, they’re just getting exactly what they want without anyone even realizing it.

Heh, it’s almost impressive how they pull it off.

Ayato: Wait… so you mean that girl knew who I was and only pretended not to so as to stalk me? But if that’s the case, then——

Shu: Haa… no need to scream, it’s almost 3 in the morning.

I’m not saying she’s a stalker, but you should probably be more cautious.

You know how fangirls are. If they see you talking to any girl that’s not them, they’ll lose it. Better to just watch out and avoid any unnecessary trouble.

— closes eyes again —

Not just for you, but for everyone else around too.

Ayato’s monologue

Shu’s right. I need to step up my game and start taking this job more seriously.

Being an idol isn’t just a paycheck; it’s a responsibility that goes far beyond me.

Every choice I make carries weight, and not just for my future, but for the company’s and everyone I work with.

Yeah… Exactly. If I let my career fall apart, it’s not only me who’ll feel it— the whole team, every project, and all the hard work we’ve put into this place will take a hit as well.

That’s why, from now on, I’m done making stupid decisions that could mess everything up. My focus is on my idol activities and nothing else.

I should have realized from the moment I signed the contract that living like a normal teenager just isn’t part of the deal anymore.

*Timeskip*

Place: Hotel kitchen

Yui: ( Working here is surprisingly relaxing. Not only that, but the co-workers I met seem very nice too! )

( I’m really excited to put my cooking skills to good use. From what I remember, this hotel has a great reputation, therefore it’s truly amazing to learn from such experienced professionals. )

???: Noooo!!!

Yui: …!?

( It’s coming from the storeroom! )

— quickly opens it —

???: ….!

Yui: Hana-san!

I-I heard you scream, are you alright?

Hana: Wa—… Was I really that loud? This is so embarrassing… I’m so sorry!

— covers face with hands —

Yui: Ah, there’s no need to worry about that, it’s fine.

More importantly, what happened? Did something scare you?

Hana: No, I’m not scared, more like… disappointed.

In case you haven’t heard already, the SAKAMAKIS are filming a special episode for their YouTube channel at three different locations, and guess what? My two favorite members are coming to this hotel in 4 days, but the issue is... it’s happening right when I’m not on shift…!

— starts crying —

On top of that, I promised my sister I’d visit her in Fukuoka, since we'll both be off work at the same time, which means that there’s absolutely no way I can meet them now!

This is such terrible timing…!

Yui: ( SAKAMAKIS… Based on Hana-san’s intense reaction, they must be some sort of important public figures, no? )

Oww… it does sound unfortunate, but you shouldn’t give up hope completely. After all, you live in Japan, so I’m sure there’s always a chance you’ll get to meet them!

Hana: It’s not as easy as you say…

They will return to Korea soon, and who knows when they’ll promote in Japan again? This was my only opportunity to see them outside of the concerts… and I couldn’t even manage to get any decent seats there.

— pouts —

Yui: ( Wait, did she say ‘concerts’? )

Ohh, I see. So they’re idols!

Hana: Eh? You… You actually don’t know the SAKAMAKIS—!?

Yui: W-Well… I’m sorry, the name doesn't really ring a bell, and to be honest, I can’t say I’m familiar with the idol world in general.

Hana: But come on, you must have at least seen their faces before, right?

— shows her a picture of them —

Yui: ( Will she be let down again if I say ‘no’? )

( Hmm… But truth be told, these boys are undeniably good-looking, and it’s clear that they must be hardworking as well, considering how they manage to juggle such hectic schedules. )

( I can easily see why they’ve captured the hearts of such passionate fans. )

— eyes suddenly widen —

( The red-haired one——! )

— blushes —

Hana: So, who did steal Yui-san’s heart~?

Yui: Ah, n-nobody…!

— gets embarrassed —

It’s just that the boy in middle… he got an incredibly well-featured face. I don’t know how to put it into words, but he simply appears unreal.

( To think that a human could look like this… it makes me a bit envious. His eyes and face shape are especially pretty. )

— Hana starts laughing —

Yui: ( Eh? Did I say something wrong? )

Hana: Get in line, that’s Ayato-san!

Hmph… just the thought of not being able to see his tiny, perfect face up close makes my heart ache.

Yui: ( Hana-san… she really seems to love this group a lot. )

( I can't help but think that if I were in her shoes, I'd feel hurt too not being able to see someone I admire so much… )

Hey, Hana-san… I know it’s not exactly the same as having it personally from him, but if it’s possible, I’d be more than willing to ask Ayato-san for an autograph on your behalf!

Hana: Eh—? Would you really do that for me!?

Yui-san, you are the best!

— hugs her —

Yui: I-It’s nothing, really.

Hana: Wait a little—! Now that I think about it, you could also totally grab a photo with them! Isn’t that wonderful?

( I can’t believe it! This way I’ll be just one person away from Ayato-san! )

Yui: Uuh… I’m sure it’d be a nice memory to look back on, but wouldn’t it bother you if I did? After all, you’ve been their loyal fan all this time, not me.

Besides, there’s no guarantee that they would agree to take a picture with an ordinary person such as myself.

Hana: That doesn’t matter, silly! They’re super chill with their fans, and everyone says they never turn down a picture request— unless they’re busy, of course. There’s no way they’d refuse you, especially not in a setting like this.

You also mentioned being captivated by Ayato-san’s visuals, so fan or not, I think anyone would jump at the chance to take a picture with such a fine man~!

Yui’s monologue

Hana-san and I continued to talk about it for a while, and during our conversation, she suggested a few of their songs for me to listen to on my way back to the Airbnb.

At first, I wasn’t sure what to expect, but as I played each one, I was pleasantly surprised.

While I’m still not very knowledgeable about this group, the melodies, the lyrics, and even the energy in their performances were captivating in a way I hadn’t expected.

That Ayato boy… he seems like someone who was born to be on stage. Such charisma and beauty… It really makes me wonder how he acts off-cameras.

Hana-san has clearly supported the SAKAMAKIS for such a long time, and to finally get the chance to meet them, only to have it slip through her fingers, must be heartbreaking.

A part of me can’t shake the feeling of guilt, even though I know very well that it wasn’t my or anyone’s fault.

It might not be a fair comparison, I know, but it reminded me of the boy I met yesterday.

He has probably forgotten about me already, but just like Hana-san dreams of meeting her idols, I find myself wishing to meet him again.

Author’s note:

* In case you're wondering why Ayato is sharing a room with Shu and not Laito, many companies assign roommates to idols randomly. The idea is that idols are supposed to get along with everyone, so the arrangement is made to promote harmony and teamwork, regardless of personal preferences.

[gudfornuthin]

Hate is a strong word

Dae ho x gn!reader

Summary: you’re not easily annoyed, but player 388 has been getting on your nerves. Is it hate, or something more intense?

A/N: I want to preface☝🏻I’m not good at writing anything too smutty. I’ve tried my best and hope you all enjoy but yeah this is as far as smut goes for me lmao. Based on this and this request. Feedback is appreciated :)

You hate his guts. Player 388 (you don’t care enough to learn his name) has made it his mission to piss you off any chance he gets. The very first game. Tripping you over. Bumping into your back causing you to almost get killed. Apparently both times were accidents. Then it seemed to get more personal.

He acts surprised and mad that you pass the second game. Rolling his eyes and slow clapping. Hitting your shoulder with his whenever you walk by to vote or get food. You can’t even think about ‘mingle’ without wanting to punch someone. He made it incredibly clear that the group he was in was not picking you. They needed an extra person? No chance, as he does his best to block you from the other players.

You want to confront him about it all. In general, he seemed like a reasonable guy. To everyone else at least. Very polite, enthusiastic and willing to get to know people better. Except for you. There was a target on your back, and player 388 was aiming right for it. Two can play at that game.

It’s late, and you’re in the bathroom leaning over the sink and splashing some water on your face. Like most people, the games have been getting to you mentally, and the only time you have a chance to think is when everyone else is asleep.

Unfortunately, the door opens, forcing you out of your moment of peace. You turn and see the smiling face of the man who’s been causing you trouble.

“Fantastic,” you huff and mumble under your breath.

He spots you by the sinks, the smile on his face quickly dropping. “Oh. Didn’t realise there was anyone else in here.”

“Just needed some time by myself to think,” you respond, hoping he’ll leave the conversation at that.

He doesn’t, as he moves and enters one of the stalls, his voice now slightly muffled. “Why? You ready to give up?”

You ignore him, knowing he’s trying to get a rise out of you. It’s not worth it. Don’t give him what he wants.

Player 388 exits the stall, walking over to the sinks and washing his hands. “If I were you I’d give up. Someone like you will never make it to the end.”

You finally snap. “Alright,” you back up from the sinks, glaring at the back of his head. “Have I done something to piss you off?”

Player 388 turns around, leaning against the counter and crossing his arms. He shrugs, looking shocked as if he didn’t expect the confrontation.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Bullshit,” you respond. “Since the first game it’s like you’ve had a vendetta against me. For what?”

Player 388 doesn’t say anything, almost lost for words. He shifts uncomfortably, looking you up and down several times. You’re still unsure of his reasons, why he may have formed a dislike for you. But if he wants to get under your skin, then you’ll have to go deeper.

You move closer to where he stands. “Oh I get it now,” he looks up. “You’re threatened.”

“Am not,” he says, sounding like an angry child.

You shake your head, staring at him in the most patronising way you can. “You definitely are. Ex marine, acting all tough, wanting the respect he so desperately craves.”

You can tell your words are getting to him, as his nostrils flare and his brow furrows. You carry on talking.

“You see someone like me, doing just as if not better than you. Braver, stronger, more resilient. It kills you.”

You’ve moved closer, now toe to toe. You can practically feel his breath on your face.

“All that training, and deep down you’re still that terrified little bitch that had to join the marines because you weren’t good enough for anything else.”

Thump!

Player 388’s fist slams right into your jaw, knocking you sideways. You’re shocked, grabbing the side of your face and feeling a painful throbbing. You look up at player 388, a similar expression on his face.

“Oh shit-”

He doesn’t have time to say much else before you’ve wrapped your arms around his waist and pushed him to the ground. You both yell out as you crawl on top of him, throwing punch after punch, hoping one will hit. It feels messy and awkward, and you can already feel the bruises forming all over your body, but this was the breaking point.

You continue hitting player 388, your hips bucking slightly from him writhing underneath you. He lets out a small moan, loud enough for you to hear. You still, as the pair of you look at each other with shock. You move your hips harder this time, another moan coming from player 388.

“Does this turn you on?” You whisper, leaning down closer to his face. “Me beating the shit out of you, or me sitting on you like this?”

You move once more, player 388 now moving his hands to rest on your legs, halting your back and forth rocking. You can already feel something hard poking at your inner thigh, instead taking your hand and moving it to the space in between you. Pressing down, he whines, as you stroke over the fabric of his pants.

Your mouth is hovering over his, as you smirk slightly. “Are you gonna be a good boy for me?”

Player 388 nods his head rapidly, as you lean down and kiss him, teeth clashing and lips devouring each other. The taste of blood falls on your tongue, not sure if it’s from the make out session or the aftermath of punching him until he bled. You can’t believe this is how things turned out. Not that you’re one to complain.

Your hand moves into his pants, gripping him strongly and continuing the stroking motion. Player 388 tries to grab your hips, but you swat him away with your other hand.

“Put your hands above your head,” you say in between kisses.

He does so, as your free hand follows them up and grabs both his wrists. You hold them in place as you pump his shaft, his none stop whining rumbling from his throat.

“Pl-please,” player 388 whimpers. “I n-need to-”

You pump him faster now, not letting him say anything else. “You wanna cum?”

Tears well up in his eyes, as your kisses trail down from his mouth to his neck. His legs are shaking and he tries desperately to move his hips higher, thrusting his member further into your hand. You’re both breathless, and you can tell player 388 is reaching his limit.

Just as he’s about to release into ecstasy, you quickly pull both your hands away, leaning back and staring down at him. He lets out a shocked gasp, raising his head as best as he can to look at you. He looks lost and you smile.

“This was fun,” you say, standing up and towering over his body. “I’m sure you can finish without me.”

You can’t help but laugh, as you slowly walk out of the bathroom, looking back briefly to see his disheveled and angry expression piercing into your figure. You still hate his guts, but he definitely hates yours more now.

- - -

Taglist:

@h3ll0k1ttyx @ivanttier @shewanfsrevenge @sugalump3d

(Sorry if it didn’t tag everyone)

[h3r4life]

STOP. STOP RIGHT THERE. What are you even doing? Wasting your time scrolling, hoping that one more method will magically unlock the universe for you. Get off Tumblr. Put down the guides and the endless advice that just keeps coming at you like a fire hose. Because here’s the thing, you don’t need any of that. You don’t need one more “hack” or “secret” to shift. You are the secret. YOU are the one who holds the power, the knowledge, the potential. You just have to tap into it.

It’s easy to get caught up in the noise, to think that everyone else knows something you don’t. But listen to me, YOU already know. You already have what it takes. The power to shift is in you, not in some random method that someone on the internet is trying to sell you. You’ve been searching for that magic key for so long because you’ve been doubting yourself. You’ve been doubting that you have what it takes to step into that reality you’ve been dreaming of. But here’s the cold, hard truth: you’re holding the key right now, and you’re the one who can unlock it.

Stop letting fear dictate your life. Stop holding yourself back. Stop doubting your abilities, your worth, and your dreams. When you look in the mirror, you’re not just seeing a reflection of your face, you’re looking at the creator of your reality and experiences. You have the power to change, to shift, to manifest anything you want. There is no limit, no rule that says you can’t live the life you’ve always imagined. The only thing holding you back is you, and I’m done watching you sit there like you’re powerless.

Enough with the self-sabotage. Enough with saying “I can’t” or “I’ll never be able to.” You’ve been using these excuses to keep yourself small, to keep yourself safe, but look where it’s getting you. NOWHERE. And you know it. You’re stuck in this loop, chasing advice like it’s going to make the difference, but the difference isn’t out there. It’s in here. Inside you.

If you really want to shift, if you really want to experience that world you’ve been envisioning, stop waiting for it to just fall into your lap. You’ve got to be relentless. You’ve got to be the one to believe, even when it seems like no one else does. You’ve got to be the one to trust yourself when everything around you says it’s impossible. You’re limitless, so start acting like it. The excuses? Gone. The doubts? Gone. The fear? GONE.

You’re not here to play small. You weren’t born to sit around and wait for someone to hand you the life you deserve. You’ve got the power to experience it, and if you’re not using it, you’re wasting your potential. Get up. Stand tall. Believe in yourself and make this happen, because YOU are the only thing standing in your way.

So stop scrolling. Stop looking for the magic method. You ARE the method. You’re the key, the answer, the creator. Everything you need is already inside you. Now stop holding yourself back and shift. Your time is now. No more excuses. No more doubting. Let your mind free. You are limitless. Now go.

[kathlare]

taste

Lando Norris x Amelie Dayman

Summary: Amelie navigates a moment of frustration after stumbling upon online gossip about her ex, Lando, and his rumored new romance.

Wordcount: 1.5 k

Warnings: none

full masterlist // request over here!

August 19th, 2023 - New York City, NY

liked by f1gossipgirl, wags_f1, and others

landoupdates: Lando spotted living it up in Ibiza with Portuguese model Magui Corceiro during summer break! 🌴🍹👀.

View all 483 comments

amelie4ever: Y’all, bring back the Amelie and Lando era. This ain’t it. → lando_obsessed: @amelie4ever Fr, we traded peak wholesome vibes for this Ibiza nonsense 💔 → lanmelie_sunshine: @amelie4ever Can’t believe he fumbled the literal QUEEN for... this.

f1tea_spill: Okay but are we sure this isn’t just a PR stunt? 👀 → gridgossip88: @f1tea_spill PR or not, I’m TIRED of this man acting like a walking red flag 🚩

magui_not_it: I’m sorry but MAGUI?! Out of all the people?? Lando, sweetie, no.

wicked4amelie: Y’all, remember when he used to simp HARD for Amelie on streams? I miss THAT Lando. → landoluvr88: @wicked4amelie The "Lanelie compilations" era hits harder now. 😭

mclarenmeltdown: I SWEAR if he’s actually dating Magui, I’m uninstalling this app. → lando_fanatic: @mclarenmeltdown Nah, sis, we’re ALL about to block him at this point.

amelie_supremacy: Can’t believe I used to root for this man. Amelie deserves SO much better.

f1teaqueen: NOT MAGUI AGAIN 😭😭 Lando really said "let me ruin my reputation this summer" 💀

-------------

The New York heat pressed against the windows of the rented studio, the kind that made the air feel heavy, like a humid blanket. Amelie sat cross-legged on the couch, her phone clutched in one hand, her jaw clenched as she scrolled through Instagram. The post had popped up out of nowhere, another notification from a gossip page she’d never followed but whose posts always managed to find her.

“Lando spotted living it up in Ibiza with Portuguese model Magui Corceiro during summer break!”

The caption was enough to send her stomach into knots, but the photo was what did her in. Lando sat in a club booth, his signature grin faintly visible as he leaned over to chat with someone she couldn’t make out. Magui, meanwhile, sat close beside him, her legs crossed and her phone in her hand. She looked effortlessly beautiful, like she knew the cameras were there.

Amelie tossed her phone onto the cushion beside her, leaning back with a frustrated groan. It wasn’t jealousy, not exactly. She was long past hoping for some grand romantic reunion with Lando, not after how they’d ended things and the fights that followed. But Magui? That was a name that still burned.

Rozzi walked in, carrying two iced coffees and a bag of pastries, her eyes immediately landing on Amelie’s face. —Oh no,— she said, setting everything down on the small studio table. —What happened? Who pissed you off?—

Amelie gestured toward her phone without a word. Rozzi picked it up, her eyebrows knitting together as she read the caption. —Ibiza, huh? Well, that’s a choice.—

—Right?— Amelie said, exasperated. —It’s not even about him being with someone... it’s her. She’s... God, she’s so fake, Roz. And the fact that she’s still hanging around after all the shit she pulled, ugh.—

Rozzi handed her an iced coffee, sitting down beside her. —Okay, so what are you gonna do about it? Besides glaring at your phone like it personally insulted you.—

Amelie took a sip, the coldness of the drink cutting through the heat in her chest. —I’m not doing anything about it. It’s not worth it.—

Rozzi gave her a pointed look. —You’re lying. I know that look. That’s your ‘I’m gonna channel this into something destructive but artistic’ face.—

Amelie smirked despite herself. Rozzi knew her too well. —Fine. Maybe I’ll write something. I mean, I’m here, right? Might as well use it.—

Rozzi grinned, reaching over to grab her acoustic guitar, which had been resting in the corner. —That’s what I like to hear. Let’s make this a masterpiece of pettiness. You wanna start with the hook or just rant your way through it first?—

Before Amelie could answer, Amy walked into the studio, her energy filling the room like a breath of fresh air. —What’s the vibe today? Drama? Sad girl anthem? Revenge banger?—

Amelie and Rozzi exchanged a look, then burst into laughter. —Revenge banger, definitely,— Rozzi said, tossing the phone to Amy. —Here, this is today’s inspiration.—

Amy glanced at the post, her eyebrows raising slightly before she handed the phone back. —Oh, this one’s gonna be fun. Alright, Amelie, where’s your head at?—

Amelie stood up, pacing the length of the small studio as she spoke, her voice steady but laced with underlying irritation. —I just... it’s not even about him. It’s about the audacity. She had the nerve to DM me when they were together, saying all this bullshit about how I was trying to steal him or that I couldn’t let go of him. And now, here she is, acting like she’s some perfect accessory to his life. It’s laughable.—

Amy nodded thoughtfully, her fingers already fiddling with the keyboard in the corner. —Okay, so we want something sharp. Taunting, maybe? Like, a ‘you’re in my shadow, and you’ll never be me’ kind of vibe?—

—Exactly,— Amelie said, her eyes lighting up. —I don’t want it to sound bitter, though. It needs to feel confident. Like, yeah, I know you hate me because I’ll always be in the picture, whether you like it or not.—

Rozzi strummed a few chords, the melody playful yet cutting. —How about something like this? It’s got that cocky energy but leaves room for the lyrics to really hit.—

Amelie nodded, humming along until a phrase popped into her head. —"Oh, I leave quite an impression, five feet to be exact..."— She paused, turning to Rozzi. —What do you think? It’s like, yeah, I’m small, but I’m unforgettable.—

—Love it,— Amy said, jotting it down. —What’s next? Something about how he can’t shake you, no matter what?—

Amelie smiled wickedly, her mind already racing. —"You’re wonderin’ why half his clothes went missin’, my body’s where they’re at."— She laughed as the words spilled out. —Petty enough?—

Rozzi’s jaw dropped. —That’s gold. Keep going.—

The next hour flew by, the three of them bouncing ideas off each other like they were in perfect sync. Amelie’s emotions poured out into every line, her frustration giving way to amusement as the song began to take shape. They leaned into the taunts, crafting a narrative that was unapologetically bold and dripping with confidence.

Amy played around with the track’s beat, layering in a sultry bassline that matched the teasing tone of the lyrics. —This is gonna be dangerous,— she said, grinning. —The kind of song you scream in the car with your friends.—

Amelie took the mic, testing out the melody with a smirk on her face. —"I heard you’re back together, and if that’s true, you’ll just have to taste me when he’s kissin’ you..."—

Rozzi whooped, throwing her head back in laughter. —Oh, she’s gonna hate this. And it’s perfect.—

As the song came together, Amelie found herself letting go of the tension she’d been carrying. By the time they reached the bridge, she was fully leaning into the catharsis of it all. —"Every time you close your eyes and feel his lips, you’re feelin’ mine. And every time you breathe his air, just know I was already there."—

Amy looked up from the console, shaking her head in admiration. —You’re savage, Am. This might be one of my favorites.—

They wrapped up the recording late that evening, the final version of Taste feeling like a triumph. Amelie leaned back in her chair, her body buzzing with the rush of creation.

Rozzi nudged her shoulder. —Feel better?—

Amelie shrugged, but her smile gave her away. —A little. It’s not like it changes anything, but... yeah. It feels good to take something shitty and turn it into something that’s mine.—

Amy grinned. —Well, whatever it is, this song is gonna light a fire under someone’s ass. And that’s the best kind of art.—

As they packed up for the night, Amelie glanced at her phone one last time. The gossip page was still there, but the knot in her stomach was gone. She smiled to herself, knowing that while the world might be watching him, soon they’d be hearing her.

[idstilldancewithu]

Forbidden Request | S.R

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Hotchner Reader

Summary: Spencer Reid always thought of every single outcome of his actions, but he did not, when Y/N Hotchner showed up to his door asking for something he couldn't refuse.

Warnings: Talks about being a prude, reader ask Spencer to take her virginity away (kind of) but doesn’t confess her feelings towards him and tells him to do her a favor as a friend, sitting on Reid’s lap, and age gap (20/30). Sorry if I accidentally missed anything.

A/N: Hi! This is the first time posting any of my work. English is not my first language. I’m sorry for any grammar mistakes. I’m still debating whether or not I should turn this into a series, but I hope you enjoy it!

Word count: 938

Part 1 | Part 2

•••

I could feel my heartbeat thumping in my chest, my hands shaking from anticipation as I knocked on Spencer's door, waiting for him to answer.

He opened the door with a hint of surprise in his eyes. "Y/N, is everything alright? Did something happen?" He worriedly asked opening the door wider signaling me to come in.

I walked towards the couch seeing files spread all over the table and books all over the floor. "I'm sorry for the mess. I didn't think I would have any company over."

I shook my head placing my hands in between my thighs. "It's ok and I'm really sorry for showing up unannounced."

He quickly shook his head, smiling reassuring me that he didn't mind. Spencer sat beside me and began stacking up the files in the table trying to clean up. "Do you want anything to drink?" He looked up at me.

"No thank you. Actually, I have to ask you something."

"Yes, of course what is it?" He moved closer to me placing his hand in mine.

Which is something he did every time I was anxious and needed comfort. I was his only exception, because he wouldn't do that with anyone else being a germaphobe. But, it always made my day better. That's why he let his walls down and made his brain stop thinking about the germs that could be transmitted through holding someone's hand.

His boss always failed to notice my state because, over the years having to grow up with a dad who was a profiler, I had to learn to lie and put on a facade when I was around him.

But, Spencer always noticed. No matter what I was hiding, he would always find out. Which is why once I would leave his office, Spencer would walk me out to the elevator.

Once the door closed, he would hold my hand, giving me much needed comfort.

I layed my head on his shoulder as he traced different shape on my hand. "Do you remember the boy I was going out with?"

"Yes, Jeremy Miller he goes to your college, and is majoring in law and criminal justice. He's twenty years old and asked you out a month ago, and you agreed. You also said the boy I was going out with. What happened? Did you break up?"

"Sometimes I forget you have an eidetic memory." I chuckled, trying to ease the nerves that were bubbling in my stomach.

"But, yes he broke up with me. Apparently he thinks I'm a prude, because I didn't want to go further than making out with him. Like, who even says that word anymore?" He squeezed my hand lightly.

"You deserve better than him Y/N and you're not a prude." He quickly reassured me again placing his hand on my chin making me look at him.

"He's not worth your time or attention. Do you understand?"

I nodded in response. "He's wasn't lying though. Spence, I've never gone farther than making out, and I'm twenty years old."

"Pretty girl, there's nothing wrong with that. The first time I did anything with a girl was when I was twenty four. Trust me there's no rush."

The nickname made my heart skip a beat. He had never called me that only Morgan did.

But coming from him, it only encouraged me to ask what I've been meaning to this whole time.

"Spence, can you change that?" He let go of my hand, and moved further from me his cheeks turning red.

"What? Y/N I'm..." I interrupted him.

"I'm tired of guys breaking up with me, because I can't bring myself to sleep with them. Just because I'm terrified of not being good enough. I'm also tired of telling guys that I'm a virgin, and them making it their mission to be the one to change that, like I'm some sort of task."

I got closer to him and placed my hand in his like he had done with me minutes prior.

"I trust you, Spencer. You're my friend, and I wouldn't want anyone else to do this with. I'm not asking you to be my boyfriend." He didn't respond but never let his gaze wonder anywhere else but my eyes.

"I'm asking you as a friend to help me. But I don't want to make you uncomfortable. I totally understand if you say no, and you want us to forget that his conversation ever happened."

I remained silent letting him process everything that I told him, my heart beating faster than before. But, I could already hear his kind rejection making my chest tighten.

Leaving me to wonder how I could ever get over him. The guy that I've loved since I was eighteen.

But I was tired of only being able to imagine how his hands would feel on my body, and biting my lip everything time I would touch myself to the thought of him.

Even thought, this could only happen once. I was willing to risk our friendship, and my pride to get to feel his lips on mine.

I got up, understanding that his silence meant no. As I began walking away, he spoke up.

"Wait Y/N, come here."

He placed his hands on his lap and patted it. I took that as a sign to sit on his lap. Once I did, he wrapped his hands around my waist pulling me closer to him.

Spencer tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear. "How could I ever say no to you pretty girl?" He whispered filling my body with excitement.

•••

Part 1 | Part 2

[cheeseceli]

When you marry someone else

Pairing: ot5 TXT × Gn! reader (individually)

Genre: angst, unrequited love, a bit bittersweet, reactions

Prompt: they attend your wedding, but you are the love of his life, and he is not the groom.

Warnings: no happy ending for now, reader wears a wedding dress on Yeonjun's, Kai has mentions of food, mentions of tears and crying

A/n: had this entire idea when showering, so enjoy the angst! | Daily click

Yeonjun

He is so conflicted

He is genuinely happy at the thought of you finding the love of your life, but he is sad because it's not him

He is happy when he sees you in that beautiful dress, but he is sad when he sees that you didn't dress up with him on your mind

He wants to sit down on the first row to see you closer, but he also wants to stand on the end of the room so it doesn't hurt that much

He loves you but he wished he didn't

At the party, he would try his best to avoid both you and your now husband

He wants to be there for you, but it seems unfair that he needs to watch it in so many details

He tries to distract himself from the fact that this night is all about you dedicating your life to someone else

And he tries to ignore his mind telling him that this someone else was so not worth of you

His vows seemed shallow, and it was ridiculous how he didn't cry when he saw you walking down the aisle. It outraged Yeonjun to see him talking with his friends instead of being with you

Everything that the groom did, Yeonjun knew he could do ten times better

But he was trying to ignore it. For the sake of your night

And when you come to him, handing him the bouquet, he can't help but feel defeated

"I want you to be the next one to find everlasting happiness" is what you said to him

So Yeonjun took the bouquet, hoping and praying that it actually meant something

Soobin

He genuinely thought on not going

The moment he received the invitation, he threw it away

And since he refused to talk to you ever since, you thought you'd be missing your best friend on your wedding day

But in the end, he couldn't help but to go to the ceremony

It wasn't fair on you if he missed one of the most important days of your life

Especially since you had no idea Soobin has been in love with you for decades

So he attends the wedding

And he regrets it the moment he gets there

Why were you so beautiful?

And why were you so happy?

He talks to all your friends and family members throughout the day

He is searching for any hint that your fiance doesn't deserve you

Anything that could give him a reason to stand up and object

But there is nothing

The man you fell in love with was nothing but a kind and generous person

And Soobin can't recall a day where you had smiled that much before

So he just sits down in defeat when you start to say your vows, wondering what he could've done in the past so today would've been different

Beomgyu

He is trying his best to act like your best friend

Like yes, he's so happy for you!!

He'll cry tears of joy and he'll party all night!!

He's doing his best to just be happy for you

Because that's what he's supposed to be

Happy for you, not happy with you

So he buys you the greatest gift you could ever imagine

He talks with every single person in the party

He is the first to go to the dance floor and he doesn't hesitate on playing with the kids

He is trying to be happy

And when your groom comes to him, thanking him for taking care of you until now, Beomgyu cries a bit

Especially when the groom vows that he will love and protect you from now on

He cries in the ceremony and cries even more when you hug him by the end of it

But as your best friend, he promises he'll always do his best to be happy for you

Taehyun

He won't be there

I'm so sorry, but I don't think he would be able to endure the pain

Every time he saw you guys on a date, or the photos you post, or the messages you sent with "I'm with my boyfriend right now, can we talk later?" always felt like a dagger in his heart

So to see everything come to life was not something he could do

He'll come see you a day before the wedding though

And in his plan, he would try to convince you to give up

He never liked your boyfriend anyways, he didn't feel like too good of a person

So he tries to hint on the topic

But you're so blindly in love that you don't notice

And he's so in love with you that he simply gives up

So he just smiles at your content and announces that he needs to go, that he will get some things ready for tomorrow

But he doesn't

He tells you that there was an accident on the road, that he was suddenly required on his work, or that there was a family emergency

Something happened, and he couldn't make it to your wedding

And upon seeing your smile on the photos, he's glad he didn't

Hueningkai

The moment you tell him you're getting married, he is volunteering to help you in anything and everything

He is there when you choose your clothes for the day

He finds the best florist in town

He helps you decide on the cake, on the place, on the date, everything

Because he knows this is the last time you'll be relying on him for help

From now on, your soon to be husband will be the one who is supposed to be by your side

Till death do you apart

And as much as it hurts, Kai won't let the sorrow be on the way

If he has this last opportunity to help you and be with you, that's precisely what he'll do

So when the big day ends up being more beautiful than your dreams

And both you and your now husband come to him to thank him

He can't help but smile through teary eyes, which he reassures you that it's because of happiness

Now he knows that he at least tried his best until the end

Masterlist | you'll probably like: moving on

Reminder this is just fiction!! I'm not trying to portray real life and you shouldn't believe that this is how the members actually are. This is just for the vibe and the delulu!

Thank you for reading <3

Taglist (open!): @yuyubeans @zzzzzwicked @sheraayasherrecs

Dividers by @enchanthings | images 1 , 2 and 3

[skyward-floored]

IAU requests: Maybe Time and Malon's wedding?

Time and Malon’s wedding coming right up 👍 I’m glad I mostly wrote this a few days ago lol. Please enjoy!

(comes a bit after this scene)

————————————————————

Time knew his excuse for being so late was a pretty good one. Considering he’d saved an entire trains’ worth of people and stopped several other villains over the course of the evening, but...

He still felt pretty bad.

Time burst into the chapel, adjusting his tie and jacket as he went. He brushed some dust off his sleeve, and hoped he’d gotten all the blood off his lip as he smoothed down his hair and rolled his sore shoulder. Warriors and Sky noticed him the moment he burst in, and Sky sighed in relief, slipping through a door that led to the main area. Warriors quickly went to Time’s side, and his younger brother gave him a look.

“Is the night still young?” Time said with an apologetic smile, despite knowing it most certainly wasn’t.

“You’re late,” Warriors said flatly, confirming what he already knew. “Like, really late.”

Time winced.

He’d been counting down the minutes until this day, anxious and excited, nervous and replaying every moment that would lead up to now. And despite his immaculate sense of time, and careful planning to get here exactly when he was supposed to... he was late.

To his own wedding.

“I know. Trust me, I know,” he sighed. Malon was going to kill him. “How do I look? Good?”

Warriors hummed, looking him up and down before adjusting his collar and tie a bit.

“Yeah, you look great... Oh, your mask!” he realized, than stood on his tiptoes and grabbed it. “You still had the mask, there you go. Are you ready?”

Time took a deep breath, and smoothed his hair back again, ignoring the summersaults his stomach was currently doing. He could do this. He’d been waiting for this moment for years now, and though he was terrified, he knew this was what he wanted.

“Time?” Warriors asked again in a softer voice, and Time breathed out, and nodded.

“Yeah. I’m ready.”

“Good luck,” Warriors whispered, and squeezed his hand.

Time squeezed it back, then let go as he pushed open the door.

He hurried into the chapel, titters of amusement and relieved looks meeting him as he passed the small group of family and friends they’d invited. Blazing Fist was laughing loudly in one of the front rows about the irony of him being late, Saria giggling beside him, and a Zora woman elbowed him from the other side, several small children seated beside her.

Time set his mind off the audience when someone else whooped at his much-anticipated appearance, and looked ahead, heart thudding. Malanya—rather, Malon— stood at the end of the aisle, in a simple, but beautiful wedding dress that fit her perfectly. Time smiled at his fiancé, feeling overwhelmed at the sight of her, and she returned it, though he saw the question in her eyes as he hurried up to join her at the altar.

The priest in front of them gave Time a disapproving look as he settled himself beside Malon, then finally began to speak.

“We are gathered here today, under the watchful eyes of the goddesses and these witnesses to join together this couple in holy...”

“You’re very late,” Malon murmured out of the corner of her mouth as the priest continued the ceremony. Time flicked his eye over to her, and winced at her expression. “When you asked me if I was doing anything later, I didn’t realize you’d actually forgotten. I thought it was playful banter.”

Time held in a sigh. “It was playful banter.”

“Well you certainly aren’t living up to your name,” Malon muttered. “I’m marrying a complete liar.”

Time’s mouth twitched. “Well maybe you should consider someone more... stable.”

Malon twitched like she was either trying not to laugh or punch him, and Time gave her an apologetic smile when she raised an eyebrow at him.

He really did feel awful about being late. But he’d done all he could to get here on time, it truly wasn’t his fault nearly the entire city had decided to be in danger today. He maybe could have tried to pass some of it by, but... he’d never been able to turn his back on people in trouble.

The priest moved onto the vows, and Time tried to listen more carefully, though it was rather difficult with all of the thoughts scrambling around in his head.

“Link Forester, will you have this woman to be your lawful wedded wife? To have and to hold...”

Malon let out a quiet sigh as the priest spoke. “I love you Link, but if we’re gonna make this work, you’ve gotta be more than just a superhero. We both do. You can’t just be the Fierce Deity, and I can’t just be Malanya. You know that, don’t you?”

“...so long as you both shall live?” the priest said, finishing his speech.

Time gave Malon a gentle smile as he turned to her, giving the woman he loved a look that confirmed his commitment to her.

“I do.”

Malon met his eyes, and she returned his smile, her gaze full of love for him.

The priest looked between them, then smiled himself, raising his hand. “I now pronounce you husband and wife.”

Time and Malon swept immediately into each other’s arms and kissed, the small audience clapping and cheering. Warmth rushed through Time, Malon’s lips soft against his, and he only barely took in Warriors letting out a loud whistle, and Sky elbowing him good-naturedly, a sappy look on his face. Malon’s father wiped a tear from his eyes beside them, his mustache upturned in a bright grin, and Impa was showing a rare smile as she clapped.

“As long as we both shall live,” Malon said softly as they finally pulled back, her cheeks flushed with happiness as she leaned her forehead against Time’s. “No matter what happens.”

Time grinned, and brushed his hand across her cheek.

“Hey, come on now. We’re superheroes,” he said as he smiled, and gave his wife’s hand a happy squeeze, love and warmth running through him from head to toe.

“What could happen?”

[elvissdollete]

Dear Elvis,

Happy Heavenly Birthday. I don’t even know where to start because there’s so much I want to say. My heart feels so full when I think of you, but it also aches because you’re not here. I love you, Elvis. I love you more than words could ever hold, more than the sky holds stars, more than anything I’ve ever felt before.

You don’t know me, and we’ll never meet, but somehow, you’ve become such a huge part of my life. You’ve given me hope on days when I had none, strength when I felt like I couldn’t go on. Even when I feel lost, you’re like this quiet light guiding me through. You make me want to be better, to fight harder, to believe in myself when it feels impossible.

Sometimes I laugh at the thought of it. Maybe it’s the 74 years between us. Maybe it’s the fact that you’ve been gone longer than I’ve been alive. But here I am, completely and utterly in love with you. It’s crazy, isn’t it? To love someone I’ve never met, someone who lived in a world so far from mine. And yet, here I am, writing to you like you’re right here, like you can somehow hear me.

I’ve seen how people talked about you. How they judged you when you gained weight, like your worth could ever be measured by something so shallow. They didn’t see the real you, Elvis. The man with the golden heart, the one who gave so much of himself to everyone else. To me, you were always perfect. Not because of how you looked, but because of who you were. You could have weighed a thousand pounds, and I’d still love you just as much. You’ll always be Elvis Aaron Presley to me—the man who makes my heart feel things I didn’t know it could feel.

I heard once that you were afraid people would forget you, that you thought you’d just fade away when you were gone. But Elvis, you couldn’t have been more wrong. No one has forgotten you, and no one ever will. You’re everywhere. In the music, in the stories, in the hearts of so many people, including mine. People don’t just remember you—they love you. You’re more than a legend; you’re a part of us.

And me? I miss you, Elvis. I miss you like I’ve known you my whole life. It’s this ache that doesn’t go away, this emptiness I can’t fill. I think about what it would’ve been like to see you, to hear your laugh, to feel the warmth of your presence. I wonder if you would’ve noticed me, if you would’ve smiled at me just once. I know it’s a silly thought, but it stays with me anyway hehe.

You’ll always be my everything, Elvis. My heart, my inspiration, my love. Even though you’re not here, you’ve left a mark on me that nothing could ever erase. Thank you for being you, for giving so much of yourself to this world.

And, oh God. Dear Jesse, happy birthday to you too ❤️ I don’t know much about you, and I never will. You were here for such a brief moment, and then you were gone, like a whisper in the wind. But even though you never had the chance to live a full life, your presence shaped the one who did.

You were Elvis’s first connection, his other half, and I believe a part of you always stayed with him. Maybe you were his quiet strength, the part of him that kept going when life got too hard.

Even though we don’t know you, Jesse, you’re not forgotten. You were loved from the moment you existed, and you’ll always be remembered as a part of him. Rest peacefully.

And again, Happy 90th birthday to both of you. I love you, Elvis. I always will.

Forever yours,

Shai ❤️

[tfs-syscourse]

10 lukewarm syscourse takes

from someone who just briefly scrolls the tag from time to time:

1. Labels are only as helpful as they are, well, helpful.

If calling yourself something feels right, that’s great. Fixating on fitting into the labels, however, isn’t.

The labels are there for you to define & communicate your experiences, not boxes for you to cram yourself into.

2. Innerworlds are not a separate physical realm, but they may present that way to a system.

Not all systems are going to have one. Some have to put effort into creating one, if they want/need it. Some systems have very vivid & complex innerworlds.

Innerworlds are a healthy form of dissociation when utilized as such. What’s considered a “healthy” amount of focus on the innerworld will vary from system to system. For some, it could be none at all.

3. This one is very much just an opinion— I don’t believe anyone should invite outsiders into the creation of their system/innerworld. (Ex. Alter packs, innerworld packs, etc.)

If these are things that are going to be parts of your brain, I believe it’s worth thinking over the pieces.

4. Fusion is a good thing, so is functional multiplicity, and the two aren’t mutually exclusive.

We’re personally aiming for functional multiplicity, but are hoping for some fusions as well. Which works better, or the proper balance between fusion & multiplicity, will differ per system.

Demonizing fusion is harmful.

5. Calling out “fakers” is useless.

I know someone who mistakenly thought they had a CDD. Through support & professional help, they came to the conclusion that they were wrong, but they now have a deeper understanding of themself & of dissociative disorders. This person wasn’t “faking it”. They did have mental health issues and problems with identity/dissociation that needed to be addressed. They just turned out not to have a CDD. (This is why professional insight can be useful.)

If someone is truly intending to fake having a CDD or being a system, they’ll get bored of it eventually. Feeding into them (ex. trying to call them out) will only make it “more fun”.

6. Having a CDD vs. not having a CDD is different. CDD systems are not the same as non-CDD systems.

Even if there’s overlap, they are not the same thing.

CDD systems and non-CDD systems can and should have spaces where they interact. I think it’s important to acknowledge that a CDD system will work differently than a non-CDD system while doing so, though.

7. Telling systems what “can’t” happen within their system really doesn’t help anything.

How would anyone but the system experiencing it know? To an extent, the only limit is the bounds of a system’s imagination. Maybe it doesn’t work that way for one system, but it does for another.

Note: Sometimes it is necessary to say that some things are simply not possible, and the belief that they are can cause harm. (Ex. The idea of someone in one system jumping into another person’s system.)

8. The misinformation spread about in online system spaces, presented as scientific fact, is concerning.

CDDs are understudied, and the internal systemhood aspect of them even more so. Non-disordered systemhood, barely studied at all.

Sometimes, the answer is “there hasn’t been enough/any research on this yet”, and we as a community need to learn to be okay with that.

On the other hand, dismissing the studies that have been done, or twisting them to fit a narrative (ex. claiming CDDs are not trauma-based disorders) is just as bad, if not worse.

9. Nuance is necessary.

Existing in online system spaces should not require “picking a side”.

I think syscourse would be a kinder and more productive topic without an “anti” and “pro” dichotomy.

10. Walking away can be best.

These are niche online spaces— anyone can leave them. If syscourse is genuinely affecting someone’s mental health, the way to deal with that is by leaving syscourse for a while. It’s okay to take a break.

Personally, I think it’s great to have no interaction with any online system content every once in a while.

That’s all for now 👋 Hope y’all are doing well and doing it with well-intentions.

[abyss-seer]

Pick A Card Read

Hey there! So as I said I will be reposting old reads. Another relationship read... But this time to heal from a previous one. I used AI to edit this reading's original transcript. So hope you won't mind it I was having a hard time with my English, still do... But I have grown a bit confident about it since then. Hope these old reads provide some insights to you guys

Channeled Song :

A revisit to the past:

What are you subconsciously holding on to from your previous connection that needs to be realized at this time?

How to choose and find your pile

Meditate on the question given and choose whichever image you feel the most drawn to then read for the pile you like the most. You can feel drawn to anything, including the signs and symbols in the images.🌸🧘🏻‍♀️😌

Warning ⚠️: I got some energy not wanting me to post this read. So here you go.

🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿

May all the evil intentions, thoughts actions, prayers sent towards me or my way be returned back to its sender. I banish any negative energy sent towards me.

🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿🧿

____________________

Pile 1

____________________

Pile 2

____________________

Pile 3

________________________

Pile 4

________________________

Trigger Warning ⚠️

This reading has focused on your subconscious patterns from past connections, aiming to be a healing experience rather than a reminder of past hurts. If you're not ready to confront these aspects, but you appreciate the concept of this reading, feel free to save it for later.

Remember, this is a general reading, so take only the messages that resonate with you and leave the rest. A tarot reading offers insight or answers to your subconscious questions. It's important not to force yourself into any interpretation that doesn't feel right; readings are meant to be more about entertainment and reflection than precision.

Be mindful of not taking things personally. This is a collective reading, and while some aspects might resonate with you, others may resonate with someone else. My readings tend to be comprehensive and detailed, which some may find lengthy or time-consuming. Please take your time with this reading. These messages are intended to awaken and provide insights, so I hope you find value in them. Enjoy the journey through these reads..

Pile 1

"My fabulous pile 1, it's time to shine a light on those sneaky subconscious patterns! Feeling like you're carrying the weight alone? Or that your close ones are more dissonance than harmony? Stop right there. You, with your radiant energy, shouldn't dim your sparkle to make others comfy. The reversed 10 of Pentacles and upright World card are clear: you deserve harmony, not discord. Some in your inner circle might envy your success, throwing shade instead of support. Enough is enough! Don't let their negativity cloud your brilliance. Whether family or friends, if they can't cheer for you, it's time to reassess.. These could particularly be family members or some close-knit friends whom you might often jeer at you behind your back

You're a beacon of hope, often boosting others up. But remember, your worth doesn't diminish by lifting others. If your gut senses bad vibes, listen up – it's your internal alarm! There could be wolves disguised as sheep among your pack. Trust your instincts; they know who's genuine.

Sometimes, stepping back from these connections is necessary to regain clarity. Test the waters before diving in again. After all, your journey to greatness shouldn't include carrying others' negativity on your back. You're destined for a horizon full of light and new beginnings!"

Ever heard the word 'trenches' whispered through the grapevine? It might sound innocent, but it carries weight. Perhaps it's a clue that someone with a French connection – maybe even a Parisian – is stirring things up. You could also be a Parisian as well. Watch out, though; this person seems all ears but is really a gossipmonger! You might've learned this the hard way through a past connection. Despite your once-friendly encouragements, they're still at it. Now, some of you might find yourselves unconsciously adopting their snarky attitude, maybe as payback for old wounds. Picture someone, perhaps you, discovering this so-called confidant mocking you behind your back – devastating, right? If that's your story, I'm truly sorry. Sending heaps of love and healing your way. Remember, it's not just about feeling disrespected; betrayal stings deep. Your hurt is valid, don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Don't brush off those feelings or blame yourself for holding onto them. Acknowledge, feel, and release. You deserve that peace."

Hey there, Pile 1! Buckle up because it sounds like you've been riding a rollercoaster of drama and emotional turbulence lately. You know those folks who've been tossing around the "petty" label like confetti at a party? Yeah, those ones. Well, guess what? You're not feeling petty—you're just in serious need of a breather from all the betrayal and hurt feelings they've been serving up.

Now, normally I'd be like, "Sayonara, drama llama!" But hey, being a tarot aficionado, I know better than to dish out generic advice. If you're stuck dealing with these characters at work or in your daily grind, it's time to lay down some ground rules. Set those boundaries like a pro and watch them try to push past 'em. And hey, YouTube is your new best friend for mastering the art of professionalism with a side of self-care. Trust me, you can do both and still keep your sanity intact.

Now, about those culinary quirks—whether you're all about those egg yolks or have a taste that others don't quite get, own it. Let them giggle in their cultural ignorance while you savor every bite. Some of you could be from east asian lineage.

Onto the tarot vibes: Ace of Swords, 2 of Swords reversed, and 9 of Wands are in the spotlight. Feeling like you're stuck in a mental maze, overthinking every move? Been there, felt that. But wait, there's hope! Even with the Hermit and 5 of Pentacles reversed lurking in the shadows, there's a roadmap out of this rut. Tap into those resources you've been neglecting and watch your luck turn.

You're not trapped in a predetermined game—you're the player. So, take a deep breath, reassess your game plan, and strut ahead with confidence. Life's too short for petty squabbles and feeling stuck. You've got the cards in your favor—time to play 'em like a pro!

Cheers to breaking free and living your best, drama-free life, Pile 1. You've totally got this!

Hey there, Pile 1! Ready to dive into the cosmic advice pool? Strap in, because we're about to decode some serious life battles and emotional rollercoasters.

So, here's the deal: not every battlefield is yours to conquer. Sometimes, it's about learning from the defeats and guiding others through their own journey. Winning doesn't define your worth, and losing doesn't make you any less of a superhero in this crazy game of life.

Feeling stuck in a rut, huh? Like your mind's trapped in a maze with no exit sign? It happens to the best of us. But guess what? This feeling of emptiness and misery—it's actually a nudge from the universe to start fresh. Time to unlock those emotions you've been hiding away. Yup, it's okay to scream, cry, paint, write—whatever floats your emotional boat. Your feelings are meant to be seen and heard, not locked away in some mental vault. "I intuitively got someone screaming noooo" You might not like this change pile 1 but your body, your vessel needs to pour those emotions whether through artistry or words.

Now, I get it—you might not be thrilled about this change. But trust me, nurturing those emotions is like feeding your soul cosmic vitamins. It builds your intuition, boosts your confidence, and sets you free to speak your truth. And hey, once you start setting boundaries and saying "no" to misery, you'll feel like a boss adult navigating life's twists and turns.

Remember, Pile 1, this journey isn't about instant wins. It's about growth, resilience, and embracing your unique path. Whether you're from Andhra or Timbuktu, this message rings true: you've got what it takes to persevere and thrive. West African counties, Timbuktu in Mali, Andhra Pradesh in India,, Northwest Africa, and Southeast India could be significant. Maybe your previous connection was with someone who came from the opposite side of the world. Both of you could have had very different cultures. This could be a current connection as well. But I am getting a past connection for most of you.

Thanks for hanging out and letting me drop some cosmic wisdom. Have an awesome day ahead, and until next time—stay epic, stay true to you! 🌟🌈

Pile 2

Hey hey, Pile 2! Get ready to unravel the cosmic mysteries of your tarot cards with a twist of magic and a dash of insight. Let's dive into the mystical realm and see what the cards have in store for you.

First up, meet the Page of Wands—a whimsical soul with a mind as colorful as a rainbow. This kiddo's all about imagination on steroids, soaking up inspiration from every nook and cranny of existence. They're like that friend who starts a dozen projects before breakfast, fueled by a burning desire to master their creative energy. Grounding plans? Nah, they'd rather leap into the next big idea and see where it takes them!

Now, entering the arena is the Knight of Swords—cue the dramatic entrance music! This knight is pure strategy on turbo mode, zeroing in on goals like a heat-seeking missile. Impatient? Oh yeah, this speed demon wants results yesterday. Watch out for the occasional crash—speed limits exist for a reason! But hey, when this knight sets their sights on something, there's no stopping them (well, ideally with a sprinkle of rationality).

Next up, the Judgement card sounds the cosmic wake-up call. It's like the universe shouting from the mountaintops, signaling a time of awakening and liberation. Those who've played by the cosmic rules are leveling up, while others might find themselves stuck in a soul-sized traffic jam. The 10 of Wands chimes in with a lesson: freedom comes when you stop playing pack mule for everyone else's problems. It's about taking charge and learning to say "NO" to what weighs you down.

And hey, amidst all this cosmic drama, who knew Purble Place tile flipping could be secret therapy for some of you? Sometimes, the universe speaks through nostalgic computer games!

Overall, Pile 2, it looks like you're tuning into how your past connections have shaped your approach to life. Maybe you started with a spark of passion or a creative itch, and now you're turning it into something strategic and structured. Whether it's diving deep into academia, crafting compelling stories, or mastering new languages, you're on a quest for growth and mastery.

So keep riding those waves of inspiration, Pile 2. Embrace your inner childlike wonder and knightly ambition.

It seems like you once navigated life with fiery enthusiasm, but now you tread a more strategically planned path. The people around you, or a significant person, have subtly helped you ascend to this new mindset. You were once overwhelmed by taking on too much at once, leading to a harsh awakening or realization that transformed your approach from impulsive pursuits to careful planning. The song "Heartbreak Anniversary" might resonate with you—perhaps this shift was triggered by heartbreak. I’m sorry you had to endure that. The number 6 could be significant; maybe someone was born in June or July, or has strong Leo placements. Fire signs (Leo, Aries, Sagittarius) and Aquarius are also notable—these could be prominent in your natal chart. The next cards, Chariot and Death in reverse, suggest someone with significant 6th house placements.

Even with opposition, you’ve resolutely pursued your goals, driven by a passion that brought you immense joy. There was a particularly happy moment in your life that you still cling to, despite a major change. In this new beginning, you chose not to engage emotionally, protecting your heart space. It seems you felt attacked, leading to an inner death and a fear of vulnerability. I envisioned a scene from the movie "3," starring Indian actor Dhanush, where his character becomes numb to his emotions, unable to move away from an apple all night due to profound despair. I'm deeply sorry if you've experienced similar emotions, feeling paralyzed by suppressed feelings. I recommend exploring tapping videos and somatic exercises for healing.

When we feel deeply, our emotions often take up residence in our bodies. Listen, pile 2, I understand—grief and remorse can be so heavy that even moving feels impossible. If you’re grieving a loss, take the time to heal. It took me years of crying, shouting, and screaming to let it all out. It's not easy, but please find your support system. These feelings are too much to handle alone. If this resonates, please take your time to heal. For some, this loss might be a loved one or even a cherished pet. I'm truly sorry you had to go through that. Take all the time you need to recover. May you find peace and healing.

When we feel deeply, our emotions often take up residence in our bodies. Listen, pile 2, I understand—grief and remorse can be so heavy that even moving feels impossible. If you’re grieving a loss, take the time to heal. It took me years of crying, shouting, and screaming to let it all out. It's not easy, but please find your support system. These feelings are too much to handle alone. If this resonates, please take your time to heal. For some, this loss might be a loved one or even a cherished pet. I'm truly sorry you had to go through that. Take all the time you need to recover. May you find peace and healing.

The last two cards are the Page of Swords and the Two of Pentacles reversed. Many of you might have learned valuable lessons from past connections about balancing curiosity and passion. Your previous relationships taught you the importance of not getting overly excited once you reach your destination but maintaining a diplomatic, pragmatic approach. This balance is crucial, pile 2. Sometimes, you might not see the results you expect and could develop a habit of withdrawing from society as a coping mechanism. Some of you may have faced bullying and tend to mask your emotions, perhaps turning to addictions like alcohol to soothe yourself. Remember, it's essential to maintain a healthy balance and seek support when needed.

Dear pile 2, it seems you might be grieving the heavy loss of a partner. Perhaps you're beginning to realize what they gave you that makes their absence so unbearable. They may have profoundly influenced your approach to life, goals, and dreams, making it incredibly hard to let go. I'm truly sorry you're experiencing this. I hope my words help you see things more clearly.

The song "Kaha Hum, Kaha Tum" from an Indian serial comes to mind—you might find it resonates. There might have been a power dynamic imbalance with your person that left one of you feeling insignificant. I’m sending so much healing energy to both of you. May you both emerge from this phase stronger and better. All my love and healing to you. Have a great day ahead, pile 2. Take all the time you need to heal. 🙏💙🫶

Pile 3

A lot of ungrounded energy is swirling around, mixed with a hint of skepticism. The cards—9 of Pentacles, 4 of Pentacles reversed, Page of Cups reversed, and Page of Swords at the back of the deck—paint an interesting picture.

Whether or not a wish is coming true, someone is determined to do whatever it takes to succeed. There’s a strong protective energy here, a bit of hoarding, as if you're guarding your achievements and accomplishments closely. This isn't necessarily a bad thing; it shows you're keeping unnecessary burdens and interactions at bay. In your past connections, you might have subconsciously developed a habit of keeping things to yourself, staying in your head, and not sharing your resources to prevent others from taking advantage of you.

Perhaps you've been demeaned in the past, leading you to become secretive and hoard everything you've earned to avoid others getting it. This has likely made you skeptical of those around you. It seems this skepticism has seeped into your life, preventing you from aligning with others for higher purposes, goals, and enlightenment. You might have grown distrustful of the universe itself and the gifts it brings. Struggling with self-forgiveness, you may beat yourself up over many things, finding it hard to accept appreciation or good things in your life, feeling undeserving.

"Cheri Cheri Lady, going through emotions, love is where you find it, listen to your heart." This song could be significant to you. You might have trouble listening to your heart, relying too much on logic to understand your subconscious patterns and emotions without truly delving into why those emotions are there. It seems like a half-baked effort, as you intellectualize your emotions and seek rational solutions without understanding the root of your skepticism towards others. Take time to explore your feelings deeply and understand where this skepticism originated.

The next pull reveals the King of Swords in reverse, the Fool in reverse, and the Hanged Man at the back of the deck. This unprocessed rebellion from your previous connections seems to be holding you back. Instead of moving forward, you’ve chosen to logically rebel against your emotions, possibly by beating yourself up for feeling a certain way. Before diving into the next chapter of your life, it's crucial to take a break and shift your perspective on how you're handling these emotions. You need to balance your emotional spheres, develop emotional self-control (not suppression), and learn to manage that inner turmoil.

The Hindi song "Lutt putt Gaya" comes to mind, which might have messages for you. Someone here could be a fan of SRK.

Interestingly, the last pull includes the Six of Cups and the King of Cups. Pile 3, have you been my client before? The synchronicity in this pile is striking, and your reading has exceeded expectations with a 6-card spread, my usual go-to.

You might be attending a reunion, reminiscent of the song "Deewangi Deewangi" from Om Shanti Om. The Six of Cups urges you to enjoy this reunion without any animosity. Don’t question your emotions; humble yourself and make amends with past connections, especially an ex if possible. If you can't reconcile, at least control your temper regarding previous relationships.

Now is the time to stop intellectualizing your feelings and allow yourself to truly feel them. For some of you, the Philippines might hold significance. Embrace this journey with an open heart and a balanced mind.

For some of you, be cautious of someone who might be plotting against you. If your ex is the type to scheme, keep your emotions in check. You could be a Taurus, Leo, Sagittarius, Aquarius, or Scorpio. Avoid lashing out emotionally, as you might regret it later. With Mars in Taurus and the South Node in Libra (in Western astrology at the time of this reading), don't let others force or emotionally blackmail you. Maintain a diplomatic stance and keep your emotions balanced.

You might be subconsciously rebelling against your achievements, holding onto past wounds and grudges that prevent you from embracing new beginnings. Dear pile 3, you're being called to adopt the Emperor role in your life and take control of your emotions. Some of you might have a habit of side-eyeing people; try to manage your impulses and ego hurts. Learn from your lessons, feel your emotions, and channel them properly. Avoid provoking situations that could lead to regretful outbursts. Expressing anger is okay, but don’t let yourself be easily provoked.

Thank you, pile 3. I hope you enjoyed your reading. Byeee 🩵🩵. Be mindful of envious people 🧿🩵. If you're dealing with emotional challenges, may you be protected and blessed. Don’t feel bad about your success, dear pile 3. Remember, you are unique and will overcome your hardships. I hope this reading brought you clarity, encouragement, and help. Have a great day, pile 3. Feel free to explore other piles if they boost your day or provide helpful insights. 🩵🩵🧿🧿🩵🩵

Pile 4

Pile 4, you’re basking in a confident energy, manifesting your dreams, desires, and goals into reality with the Magician and the Star, supported by the King of Pentacles. You think it, your subconscious knows it, and you make it happen. Your biggest lesson from past connections is this incredible ability to turn thoughts into reality.

The next pull—King of Wands reversed, Hanged Man reversed, and 8 of Wands with 10 of Wands at the back—indicates a parent-child dynamic or similar connection. Someone was pushed to chase blessings, despite carrying heavy burdens, in a tough-love scenario. They were forced into a lightning-speed race to reach a destination, their head overwhelmed. This is a strong family connection for some of you. Pisces, Aries, and the February-April season could be significant. For others, it might be a love connection or a platonic friendship where you were advised to take the hard route to success. You might be realizing this about your family, like a fish circling its intuition to create a happy place. Some of you have large families and stay in touch with many relatives.

The final pull—Empress and King of Cups reversed—reveals you recognizing your power as a creator, letting your creative side flourish. However, you might be choosing your head over your heart, avoiding emotions due to a lack of rest or an inability to calm yourself. This could lead to nightmares or sleeplessness because you feel unaccomplished. Fishes, often symbolic of emotionless and follower-type behavior, represent your struggle to confront your emotions.

Pile 4, your journey is about balancing your immense manifesting power with emotional self-awareness. Embrace your creative side and confront your emotions to achieve true fulfillment.

Pile 4, what you might be realizing about the things you were subconsciously holding onto is a creator's angst, stemming from sacrificing yourself for others' dreams, wishes, and desires. It seems you’ve finally started listening to your calling and are swiftly moving toward your goals and dreams. Just make sure not to burn yourself out with immense passion, craze, excitement, or recklessness, especially if you have sleeping problems. Check your sleep schedule and avoid overdoing things.

You are entering an era of manifesting everything you’ve thought of into your present reality, bringing justice to yourself and balancing the scales of needs and wants in your life. All the best for your new journey, Pile 4. Some of you might have come here from Pile 2. May God bless you on your journey ahead. ✌️ Pave a good future for yourself. Byee 🩵🩵🩵

[skvaderarts]

Jayvik Request #1: By Eros Set Ablaze

Summary: Word Count 3.9K A03 Link

Viktor heads to the forge for the first time to see Jayce about some discrepancies in their calculations and it awakens something in him. The "this better not awaken anything in me" meme except he doesn't even get past the first three words. Set right after they meet in S1.

Slowly working my way through the ones you voted for on this list.

By Eros Set Ablaze

Note: This one is for Kaylakenobi and Wuekka! Truly, we all have the Jayvik Brain Rot. There is no hope for us. I hope this was worth the wait!

—

It was a combination of necessity and curiosity that compelled him to leave the lab that day. 

Waiting for a break in the rain, he’d seized his opportunity and left behind the familiarity of the lab to venture across town, his destination a place he’d never been but had heard oh so much about.

Jayce had a complicated relationship with the forge, at least by Viktor’s personal estimations. He spoke of his work there often and held great pride and reverence for his family’s heritage as toolsmiths and skilled metal workers, but also seemed to feel trapped by that same legacy at times. Perhaps that was part of the driving force that had guided him down the path to creating Hextech. A desire to improve lives, but also a yearning to stand out via his own merits. To make something of himself outside of his family name. To break the mold, metaphorically speaking. He didn’t want to spend his entire life in a forge, hammering away against an unyielding anvil until his arms and back gave out any more than Viktor wanted to spend his existence as someone else's assistant. Neither of them was content to stay in the boxes that had been constructed around them by the circumstances of their births.

The two of them truly were more than the sum of their parts when they worked together. They were partners.

It was that little word, wasn’t it? The way that Jayce had claimed him as his equal the moment he’d proved that his conviction matched his own. The night it had become their dream, not just Jayce’s. The way his friend’s idealism brought out his own, long since buried under layer upon layer of staunch pragmatism. The way it inspired such undying loyalty in him. No one had ever looked at him and seen someone worth touting about at their side with pride. The vast majority of people didn’t even ask him his name. His position as Heimerdinger’s assistant had held more weight than his first name ever had. Yet he couldn’t muster the energy to lament that fact. It was simply the way it was.

Except with Jayce. Never with Jayce.

Jayce was out of the lab that day, working on a prototype mold for a new project they’d just finalized the dimensions on. Or so they thought. That was what his intrepid companion intended to find out and the reason why he’d made the decision to do the molding process himself. And consequently, the very thing had brought Viktor out in the rain. A risky endeavor for him specifically. He didn’t want to consider the dire consequences of slipping on the uneven cobblestones beneath him. Such a largely inconsequential thing to everyone else. But him?

Other workshops and small parts manufacturers were ready and willing to do the job for them should the need arise, but Jayce hadn’t seen the point in bringing anyone else on board when he was certain that he could handle it. He was going to try. And if he couldn’t then he would ask for help. It wasn’t a matter of pride so much as it was a matter of certainty in his competency. He knew from hard-earned experience that this should be a simple task for him, so why not spend a few hours doing the physical work required? He wasn’t above it.

And Viktor wanted to see it. He wouldn’t admit that, but he did.

Forge work wasn’t simple. Hammer work by its very nature refused to be delicate on the body. Yet the very notion of such a thing was strangely thrilling to him in concept alone. He’d seen the aftermath of a few of Jayce’s trips to the forge, but this time he wanted to see if he could watch the process unfold. To educate himself.

Such a romantic notion, to be physically capable of such a task. Though perhaps only to him. He didn’t desire to try it, but still.

Viktor fiddled with a folded sheet of paper in his pocket as he approached the address. He’d never seen the building in person before. In his mind, it was far smaller. And yet here it stood, in all its magnificence. The Talis family forge. As splendorous as it was intimidating at first glance.

Clad in bricks that reached a height equal to that of several multi-story buildings in its general vicinity, the factory building cast a shadow over him as he gingerly navigated the gravel path that led to its side entrance. He’d been told to use it instead of the bay doors should he stop by while Jayce was there. According to him, he kept it unlocked in case of emergency. A good policy. It was always best to take preventative steps when working with volatile, flammable substances.

It was a truly colossal building with soaring ceilings and mammoth riveted steel beams that spanned the width of the and breadth of the ceiling, supporting the building's roof. The structure was dark inside, save for the tall, narrow lead glass windows that flanked either side of the forge’s chimney that stood like a monolith at the center of the back of the building. Along the length of the towering central pipe were slats to visually indicate the position of the flame. 

And by that metric, the machine had only recently been activated. There were flames in the mouth of the forge, but they were low and didn’t seem especially hot.

Viktor paused as he got a better look at the machine. Surely he’d gone to the wrong part of the building? This didn’t look like the kind of complex mechanism that could be operated without a skilled team at the helm. He wasn’t familiar with how the forge was operated, especially one of this magnitude, but it was gargantuan. How was someone supposed to turn it on, let alone use it?

Clearly, he needed a better look at the machine.

As he ventured further into the vast space, the full breadth of the machine became undeniable. Impressive. Truly an impressive work of mechanical engineering. A tool of a truly timeless trade. But then something else caught his eye.

Standing ever so slightly off to the left side of the machine was Jayce, and he appeared to be assessing something. Perfect. Just who he was looking for. He hoped it wasn’t a bad time to interrupt him but-

Taking a deep breath, Jayce grasped one of the leavers on the left side of the machine, pulling it downward until it clanked loudly, a loud rumble emanating from the floor below them. With a concerted effort, Jayce then heaved the resistant leaver back into an upright position, locking it into the proper notch required by the mechanism to enable the machine to do… something. He released it and stepped back, watching as the cogs and gears creaked to life and slowly began to turn. They were larger than he was in both circumference and height, but they still budged, if only marginally. Stopping to observe, he caught sight of his unexpected guest.

“Oh! Hey, Viktor! I didn’t hear you come in! You got my note about me being away from the lab today, then?” He did not speak with the air of a man who had just done what he had. There wasn’t a hint of strain to his tone. Despite how difficult that had looked, it had posed little difficulty for him.

It was impressive, honestly. Viktor’s pulse picked up a bit, something he barely perceived, but still noticeable, even if the cause wasn’t clear to him. He had never considered Jayce weak by any means, but that had still thrown him for a loop a little. It had been, dare he admit it, thrilling to watch? Why was that?

Jayce made his way over to him at a leisurely pace, pleasantly surprised to see him. He’d been asking him for the better part of the last half a year or so to come by. Perhaps a tad longer than that. They were always working on some project or another, but mostly in the drafting and scale model phases. And if they weren’t then they were collaborating on the structure, Viktor was generally at home with all the small core components and mechanisms while he worked on the casings and structures. A harmonious whole. Complex algorithms; networks of masterfully drawn diagrams and grids. Sequences and probabilities. It was a science. Much like fire. And yet, so unlike it. So much less wild and uncontrollable. Or so they knew thus far.

“I’m surprised you finally took up my offer to see how this all works. Do you want a demonstration?” He asked almost a little too eagerly. The shorter of the two couldn’t help but be subtly amused by his thinly concealed excitement. He was trying to play it off as confidence, but Viktor knew Jayce well enough to recognize that special brand of childlike wonder that flared up in him any time he was eager to share something new with someone. How could he deny him the pleasure? And for what?

In truth, Viktor was there on other business entirely. His curiosity notwithstanding, he needed to go over a few key calculations with Jayce before they proceeded with the testing phase. He wasn’t sure if they would have a knockdown effect on the physical dimension of the prototype that Jayce was about to cast, so he’d elected to come. His desire to finally see the forge in person was a secondary personal desire, even if it was one that he was eager for an excuse to indulge in.

It was strange. He was a child of the Undercity. He’d never been a stranger to industrial processes, or especially curious about the majority of them aside from loathing their negative effects on the air quality of the place he called home. He’d seen bits and pieces of them during his time. But this was the first instance that he could recall where he was genuinely intrigued. Perhaps it was Jayce’s personal ties to the process that sparked his curiosity. He was contagious. His excitement and optimism.

“Certainly, Jayce. That being said, the calculations… “ Viktor gradually trailed off as Jayce untucked his collar and began to undo the front of his shirt, shrugging out of his vest. He then set to work undoing the buttons on the front as they continued their conversation, much to the growing confusion of his companion. Surely working with hot metals with no shirt on was an occupational hazard? Was it a matter of being more exposed to the air for cooling purposes? The mind boggled.

“Hold on. Give me one second to get this going and then I can give you my undivided attention. This isn’t nearly hot enough.”

“It isn’t?” Viktor eyed the forge curiously. How exactly did one go about heating something like that? Or gauging the heat levels when they were this low. Was there another lever that he needed to pull to facilitate this process? He supposed he would find out shortly but it was still an exciting prospect. He couldn’t fathom even trying to handle something like this. Knowing his luck, he would tumble into the forge. Not from clumsiness, but sheer bad luck. He seemed to be brimming with that.

But as he pondered this, his eyes drifted back over to Jayce and he froze. His body became as rigid as steel and his breath as slight as a whisper.

He’d… never seen Jayce with his shirt off before… 

Despite the amount of time they spent together, they’d never had any reason to. He was sure that Jayce had probably disrobed around him before, but his eyes were always on the task at hand and hardly ever on what was going on in his immediate vicinity. Their work demanded focus.

And perhaps that was a good thing because if he’d seen him like this under those circumstances it would have almost certainly resulted in an accident at the lab.

Jayce shook his head in response to his previous inquiry. He hadn’t noticed the look of surprise on Viktor’s face. Seen the look of perplexed turmoil that followed it. The quiet panic in his eyes as he realized he was staring and desperately tried to stop doing so to no avail. One eye on the forge at all times, especially with a second person there. There would be no slip-ups.

Viktor only vaguely registered what Jayce was doing as his eyes swept over individual muscles they could find from his torso to his shoulders and neck. It was an arresting sight, the way they flexed as he roughly folded what he’d been wearing, paying little mind to how the room had fallen silent. Each muscle was toned in a way that alluded to his industrious and unconventional athletic habits. It made perfect sense to him now why Jayce always looked so… fitted in everything he wore, but the sudden realization still blindsided him like being doused with freezing water. 

Perhaps that was what he needed someone to do, actually.

“Hold this for me, would you?”

The question was entirely innocent and mundane on Jayce’s part, but Viktor couldn’t help the way his heart threatened to spring from his chest as he accepted the garments with a nod, gesturing with an outstretched hand towards the forge. He kept his composure, feigning a demeanor of composed casual professionalism and unspoken comradery with his closest companion, but he would not attempt to deny the internal struggle he felt surging within him. He felt his heart leap again, this time pounding in a way that made him sure he was very close to embarrassing himself. What was happening to him?

“You might want to stay a few feet back.”

Stepping away from Viktor, Jayce returned to the front of the forge where he took a moment to loosen his shoulder before reaching up and grasping the two-handed bar-like handle that powered some sort of pulley system. The machine groaned and shuddered as gears turned again, faster this time than previously, expanding and contracting the bellows that sent air into the forge. He continued in a rhythm, pulling downward on the handle before allowing it to ascend again, the muscles in his hack and arms flexing as the machine did battle against him but was pulled back under his sway yet again, Jayce always winning the tug of war. Sweat ran down his body in channels from a combination of the exertion and heat, but he hardly noticed, so focused was he on the task at hand. He kept pulling.

The flame grew brighter. Bolder and more brilliant until it soared high above them, the central chamber whistling from the suffocating pressure that had been building up within it. The forge rumbled deep, the ground beneath them shuddering ever so slightly as the fire scorched white hot, silhouetting Jayce in a flattering light that highlighted every visible edge of every muscle his exposed torso was constructed from.

He wasn’t alarmed. Viktor hardly registered the vibration beneath his feet or the now deep red and pink flush on his face. He felt his breath catch and then slow, deepening before evening out gradually. Following the same rhythm Jayce’s body did until he came to a stop and pulled something from the forge, reaching over to grasp the handle of a large hammer.

He was cut like polished stone, chiseled from fine marble like the grandest spires of Piltover. Like a sculpture crafted for his eyes and his eyes only. It was mesmerizing. The rhythm of it. Viktor’s heart rose and fell with each deafening pound of the hammer, the sound wringing through his entire being. His gaze followed the arch and flex of the muscles in Jayce’s shoulder and back as his eyes saw little else. The exposed skin on his face and arms pricked from the warmth that flowed through him, be it from the scalding temperature of the forge, or the blood that pounded through his arteries and veins he did not know. He had stopped questioning it by then.

Viktor hadn’t registered that he’d gradually inched closer to him any more than Jayce registered the questioning gleam in his eyes as they bore into him from behind, the blaze of the flames reflecting in his warm amber-brown irises like light dancing off the shoreline at night. He crooked his head ever so slightly to the right, his normally brilliant mind unable to conjure any other image than the one before him. Unwilling to manifest a single other thought than the ones currently dancing about his now vacant skull.

This sight as he beheld it in all its unexpected splendor, this experience. It had such an effect on him. Such a hold on his failing faculties or lack thereof. And it gripped tightly, unyielding. Unrelenting in its almost vengeful power. He had never felt such a rush of sensation before. He felt the deep flush in his face spread to his neck and his ears as he let out a heavy breath. The air was stifling. Sweat ran down his face as he watched intently, only barely focused on the demonstration. He almost felt faint.

He suddenly thought better of his no doubt disheveled appearance and made a concerted effort to compose himself, shifting his posture ever so slightly for what little good it did. What he needed was a distraction, but there was no salvation to be found. Within the walls of the building stood only Jayce, the forge, and himself. Only the flames fanned by the kiln of Hephaestus himself as Viktor lingered upon the precipice of purgatory, lips sealed in voluntary damnation. Oh, how readily and unknowingly he’d strolled with open arms into the mouth of hell.

Jayce finally came to a stopping point in his demonstration and glanced over at him, immediately noticing two things. That he’d gradually made his way just that little bit closer but not close enough to put himself in danger, and that he looked noticeably dizzy. It seemed that way to him, at least. His face was flush and he looked almost startled that he’d turned around. His breathing seemed uneven in its pace and depth and he wasn’t standing up as straight as he normally was, leaning more on his cane than usual.

“Viktor, are you alright? You look a little overheated. Maybe you should sit down?”

“Overheated? No, I… ” He considered protesting for a moment before realizing that Jayce had misunderstood his current state and decided against it. He was right, in a manner of speaking. He certainly felt warm, but not externally as much as he did internally. Why push him away from a desirable conclusion in favor of one much more personally humiliating? He didn’t have the faintest idea how he would explain what had just happened to Jayce if he was pushed to. He hardly understood it himself. He’d never experienced such an intense reaction to something so harmless in his entire life.

But the more he thought about it, all he could do was shake his head slightly and let out a small chuckle. Jayce had promised to educate him should he ever stop by, and that was certainly one way of looking at the experience. Educational indeed. Eye-opening. He had some soul-searching to do. Or if he was willing to be honest with himself, perhaps he didn’t.

There were some… obvious conclusions he could draw from his experience.

“I suppose I’m unaccustomed to the heat.” It was a half-truth and he knew as much, but it was so much simpler than explaining that. He needed to figure that out for himself first…

Jayce hurried over with a chair he’d stolen from the back corner of the room, setting it a few feet back from where Viktor currently stood. Further from the offending flame but still within view of his work. He gripped the chair and held it still, concerned that Its wobbly back leg would prove to be a tipping hazard to someone who wasn’t aware of it. Maybe he should fix it just in case this visit wasn’t a one-time thing. He hoped it wouldn’t be.

��Seems that way.” 

“Still…” Viktor attempted to look in every direction aside from straight ahead at his friend’s chest as he leaned over him in the chair, his arms outstretched over him as he grasped the back of the backrest. He kept his eyeline and head straight ahead, lower than Jayce’s viewing angle allowed him to properly register, Viktor’s eyes lining up almost perfectly between his chest and his stomach. The way he glistened in the low light, the fire framing him as the storm raged on outside visible only through the murky windows behind the forge… “Did you have more to show me?”

Jayce nodded and stood back, letting go of the chair. If it was going to tip or he was going to fall over then it would have happened by then. “If you're up for it. I’ve got a few ideas to run by you.”

Oh, he most certainly was.

Clearing his throat and shaking his head as if to physically shake the image he’d just borne witness to down into the depths of his subconscious, he leaned back into the chair so he could reach into his pocket and fish out the piece of paper he’d brought all the way over from their lab. Unfolding it, he handed it to Jayce who grasped it and immediately started reading over the calculations. His brow furrowed. There was a problem.

“Most certainty. And your calculations are off. By half a percent, might I add. We must have been falling asleep when we did this.” Viktor sounded amused and they both shook their heads in disbelief, but it was still a problem. It would’ve cost them time and resources to make a second mold and they had too much going on for that. But that crisis had been averted so that was one less thing to worry about. “The corrections are listed on the back. You misplaced a variable. An easy mistake to make on two hour’s sleep.”

Jayce looked like he was going to ask if Viktor had come across town specifically to bring this to his attention, but he knew that was the case. He continued to wear that amused look crossed his face. They probably had been half asleep. It was becoming more and more common for them to spend grudgingly long hours in the lab. A habit he hoped they would collectively break after this new breakthrough. “Well, I’m glad you mentioned that now. Just in time, too. Looks like I have to make a few corrections. I’m going to have to heat the forge back up. Are you going to be able to handle that, or is it going to be too much for you?”

Oh, he certainly hoped to find out.

—

Am I the first person to write something like this? Probably not. Is it any good? Debatable. Did I laugh while writing it? Yes. So I hope you enjoyed reading it! Sorry for the wait! And if you have any further requests, let me know! I have a few more Jayvik prompts coming in the near future and more chapters of one of my existing works on the way (along with another mini multi-chapter fic that I’m about to start) so feel free to check those out. I’d love any feedback you can give me. Thanks for checking this out! I hope you have an awesome day!

[asher-agere]

PJSK SANRIO

HI GUYS THIS ISN’T AT ALL RELEVANT AGERE POSTING OR ANYTHING BUT LIKE THE PJSK SANRIO EVENT WAS TODAY AND ALL MY HOPES AND DREAMS CAME TRUE

I DIDN’T EVEN WANT SAKIS AS MUCH AS TYE OTHER THREE BUT LIIE OMG I’LL DEFINITELY ACCEPT THAT???

I had to buy Ena’s but like- Whatever- Still worth it- BUT YEAH. SOMEONE BE EXCITED WITH ME PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

[mizuki-foreshadowing]

Mizuki surrounds herself in mystery, but I feel like there's a comparable amount of mystery surrounding Ena.

There isn't even an implied reason for why she's a social outcast;

Kanade is basically a ghost in every detail of her lifestyle, she doesn't leave the house, she isn't even able to keep it clean or livable without Honami, who's also the only reason she eats things other than instant noodles or nutrient bars, and aside from taking genuinely good care of her hair, she's really barely alive; Mafuyu sacrficed her sense of self and the significance to herself of the way she feels about things to her mothers expectations of the perfect overachiever prep school daughter and it's slowly (and quickly) killing her; and Mizuki's taking on the world alone (alone by choice mind you) as potentially the only trans girl she even knows about, trading a persona who's bitter and miserable from constantly getting burned for liking cute things, for one who embraces loving cute things at the expense of emotionally shutting out literally everybody, since she can't be burned if she never lets herself get emotionally vulnerable.

But with Ena, I'm not sure why. Not even that I simply don't know yet, I don't know what I'm supposed to think the reason is.

There is definitely something to be said for Ena's temper. She blows up at Mafuyu in the Main Story over, to her, squandering talent that Ena can't hope to know herself, for self-important reasons such as being saved or one's true self, and Airi talks about Ena's history with her temper to Mizuki in What's On Your Mind - Exciting Picnic (episode 4), how it was even the reason they first became friends. And a great many of Ena's very finest moments open with her telling someone to shut up. Almost certainly, the only reason Mizuki didn't get an earful on that rooftop in What Lies Behind - What Lies Ahead is because Meiko told Ena she needs to hold back and understand that she simply doesn't have the full story. All of this in addition to how, in her first focus, she backed herself into a corner staking her sense of worth as an artist on a contest submission over how heated a fight with her dad had got; the letter that she was not even considered for that contest wouldn't have devastated her if her dad didn't know she entered.

Obviously, there's her relationship with her dad, which is definitely where her (and Akito's) anger issues come from. Him telling her in no uncertain terms that at the end of the day she lacks talent and can never consider art professionally, came completely out of the blue to Ena. Before, he supported her love of art; it was only when she started to follow her dreams of doing it professionally like her father that he changed his tune. But even the resolution of that event (Insatiable Pale Color), where Akito got him to understand that Ena is really hurt from, to him, his desire held over many years now to set her on a kinder life path than the one he walks and sees lesser artists try and fail to walk, and to remember to be kind to his daughter as a father again, he really couldn't even do that. He snuck into her room, complimented a part of her art, immediately before telling her with just as sharp an eye why it's bad, but just, didn't even mention anything about their relationship, and certainly didn't apologize. He didn't even give her the 'I know she won't be able to walk the path I had to so I'm doing this to help her' speech he gave to Akito. So Shinei is definitely a problem, but I'm not sure he's why Ena's a social outcast, per se.

It might seem like Ena is a social outcast because her temper makes it so she can't have friends, but Airi is living proof that isn't true, that Ena is able and equipped to maintain longterm friendships. Significantly better than Mizuki is, in fact; Mizuki and Rui maintain a certain distance despite each still caring for the other. Moreover, both Airi and Ena have a tendency to snap at people and get harsh, so it also isn't an easy friendship to maintain.

Beyond her father and her temper, there's just seemingly unrelated details to go off of. Time and again, Ena is shown to eat sweets and deserts and not care what anybody has to say about it, while living a completely sedentary lifestyle. It comes up that her physical fitness isn't much better than Kanade's and is worse than Mizuki's, and people are always chiding Ena when she eats whatever she wants. This seems to be a coping mechanism, and fair; it's good to find a little joy in what you eat.

Potentially, Ena's attitude about her diet [or lack thereof] is a side-effect of her longtime friendship with Airi, who (understandably) has internalized herself keeping a good figure almost as a matter of life-or-death, and she'll also always be chiding Minori about eating what Minori wants, despite Haruka very much having Airi's same relationship with food. (I'm convinced Shizuku just genuinely loves eating healthy, but this may be me falling for her mask). I think put together, this implies Ena's a little on the chubby side, but that's not quite enough either for why she's a social outcast.

At the end of the day, Ena simply doesn't fixate on her figure, in direct contrast to how we see that featuring in with the More More Jump story; if they wanted to write Ena as having an unhealthy relationship with being pretty for her selfies, they've shown that they could. Ena does love fashion and does keep up with the trends and magazines, and Mizuki points out in the main story that Ena's really good with camera filters. Another way Ena has coped with not receiving the love her father is keeping from her, is trying to find it in social media, with her social media fame. Whether it's supposed to be Twitter or Instagram, she uses her account exclusively to post selfies that she tags very simply, while maintaining an internet-safety level of anonymity. Presumably she posts as Enanan because Mizuki comments in the main story that her social media account is the only thing Mizuki really knows about Ena's life outside N25 (and that the only thing she knows from it is what Ena looks like).

The elephant in the room, and why I don't consider her social media fame as a counterexample for why Ena can't possibly be a little chubby, is that Ena is a high schooler, and she became an instagram idol when she was a middle schooler. In theory, Ena knowing this reflects poorly on the people who fawn over her mere seconds after a posting a selfie, is the reason the gratification and attention she gets doesn't sustain her for more than a quick high.

In theory, all of this put together means Ena fits right in with the rest of the N25 cast, but, I just can't help but feel like there's something I'm missing.

[duskdog]

I've been approaching the riddles with the thought that Eddie is actually answering Steph's questions. I've considered each one in response to the question directly preceding it. 1. "The gift that keeps on taking. The theft that keeps on giving" is in response to "What did he say about me?"

I generally agree with something of a combination of what's been proposed before. The gift that keeps on taking is traditionally the White Elephant, a gift that causes more trouble than it's worth, and I think it's likely -- given what we know of Arthur and how he reacts to failure/being beaten (he goes on angry rants!) -- that he may have reacted the same to Steph getting in his way. Here's his child, something that's supposed to bring him joy, and all she does is fuck him over.

(He may even be, vaguely, remembering a time when she did bring him joy, maybe when she was a new baby, and it just makes him all the more bitter now. I don't know if we can fairly say that he actually cared about her even then, but I'd like to think there was a time when he and Crystal lived a semi-normal life? I'm sure it was never a healthy relationship, but they got married -- clearly once upon a time they had feelings for each other, and hopes and dreams and stuff. Maybe Arthur was happy to hold his new baby. And now look at what a pain in the ass she is.)

Regardless, something that's supposed to be seen as a blessing has been nothing but a curse -- and I could definitely see Arthur going on more than one angry rant about it to Eddie. (Last we saw him and Eddie together, after all, they were getting thrown out of the house, and it doesn't take a genius to realize that the only reason Black Canary would know they were there, or care, would be because of Steph.)

2. The bug riddle is in response to "why do you believe he had to leave clues to his crimes?".

First I have to preface this by saying that this is a weird question for Steph to ask, because as was pointed out, Arthur hasn't been leaving clues for a long time by this point. Still, it may be something that bothered Steph a lot when she was younger, and maybe still bothers her? I'm one of those folks who believes Arthur was suffering from OCD (which is never outright stated, but I believe is implied when he talks about how he was "cured" of his need to leave clues -- at the very least, this makes me think that it was psychological in some fashion, and some flavor of OCD best fits the bill, so he may have begun taking some sort of medication?), which does have a genetic component, but we've never seen any indication that Steph would be worried about anything like that, or that the thought has even ever crossed her mind, so I don't think that's a factor.

So why does it matter? I think it's just that Steph is just trying to understand her father. She's just recently found out that he's dead, and now she has all these unresolved questions, and unresolved feelings, and him leaving clues was a core part of his original costumed persona. He never changed his name from Cluemaster, either, even after he stopped leaving clues. I think the question is still important to Steph, because the clue thing had been a big part of who Arthur was, and "who Arthur was" is exactly what she's trying to resolve right now.

I think, with this riddle, Eddie may have cut straight to the heart of the matter that I just discussed -- this seemingly no-longer-relevant question that's still clearly very important to Steph even so. Digging up Arthur's metaphorical bones here makes her the bug... but which bug? Is she going to let these questions, these feelings, trap her in someone else's web -- is she going to get tangled up in the man Arthur was, in his mistakes, and let that devour her? Or is she going to cocoon in her own web instead, nurturing herself through this in a more healthy manner, and emerge better for it?

3. "Dog in a manger" is in response to "Did he ever talk about someone who hurt me? Someone named Murray?"

This one is... complicated.

To understand, it's important to note that this saying has a long, long history, and variations of it have been used in several different contexts throughout that time. At its core, it's exactly as described above -- someone who selfishly hoards something it doesn't need/can't use so that others cannot have it. But there are a lot of different shades of that thought. In one of its earliest references, it was specifically used as a commentary on pederasty -- the practice of sexual activity between a grown man and a boy/youth. And there are multiple instances later on where it's used in a similar (if less pedophiliac) fashion to comment on May/December romances -- the idea is that, when an older lover takes a much younger one, they're "wasting" the younger lover's beauty and vigor, which they can no longer hope to match themselves.

Jim Murray, a grown man, lusted after Steph, who was only 11. I don't think Eddie is trying to play games with this one, or analyze anything. I think he's just straight-up (as straight-up as the Riddler can get) answering the question. He's saying "ah yes, that guy who did that", which clearly indicates that Arthur did mention Murray.

He may also be subtly casting judgment on that, since he chose a reference that generally condemns such a thing, but it's hard to say.

4. "What day has no man lived to see?" is in response to "Do you think he wanted to give up crime?"

The actual traditional answer to this riddle is "tomorrow". No man lives to see tomorrow, because when it arrives, it immediately becomes "today".

I think this one is just really simple, and really sad. He's saying that we'll never really know. Steph herself is struggling with the idea that any possibility of her father ever changing his ways is now gone. All potential destroyed in death.

What could have, and maybe would have, happened "tomorrow" is beyond any of them. Maybe Arthur did want to give up crime, or maybe he didn't -- it doesn't matter, because he didn't live to see that day.

I think that's the answer that's most likely. However, he also might be trying to say that Arthur did want to give it up, but just didn't live to see the day when he would, if you also interpret the next riddle a certain way...

5. "The tiger envies the oxen but only understands its horns" in response to "Did he want to stop?".

Going out on a limb with this one, but given the question I think he's answering: the oxen lives peacefully on the farm, working hard but without strife or worry. The tiger envies this peaceful life, but as a creature of violence, all it understands is violence.

Eddie may be saying that Arthur did want to stop... at least on some level. Maybe a part of him did want that more peaceful life, without all the stresses associated with the life they lead as criminals.

But he would probably never achieve that, because crime/violence is all he understands.

I think, however, it's far more likely that Eddie is just following up on the previous answer, and not implying anything about what Arthur actually did or did not want to do. It doesn't really matter what Arthur wanted -- it never had a chance to happen, and frankly, it probably wasn't ever going to anyway. Because Arthur really only understands one way to be.

6. "The number you can't count on your fingers" doesn't have an associated question at all, but it's directly in response to "One straight answer and I'll leave."

Eddie struggles here before giving his riddle, and the impression I get is that it's not just because Steph has gotten violent with him at this point. What I can't decide is why he would find it difficult to continue, when he's been rapid-firing riddle responses for the entire conversation. Maybe it is just because Steph's about to beat the shit out of him and he knows it, but... I don't know. It doesn't feel that way.

As for the riddle... it doesn't really have a good traditional answer. I've seen reference to it being "11" (which is mildly interesting because that's how old Steph was when Jim Murray tried to assault her), but that doesn't actually make any sense to me -- there are tons of numbers you can't count on your fingers, not just one (or, alternately, you can count even more than that if you think beyond just counting by ones).

I think @armed-with-a-waffle-iron is probably correct here -- Eddie thinks Steph is missing the point. What she's looking for is something that can't be quantified. There are no answers. The way I interpret the previous two riddles, this one would follow naturally: none of what Steph is asking about matters. She's not going to find what she's looking for here, at the very least.

The part that throws me for a loop, actually, is the Riddler's words after Steph leaves. Steph having a question mark over her head is a pretty obvious thing to say, but why is he speculating about Arthur's "game"? It seems to imply that he thinks/knows that Arthur is alive... but even if that were true, why would he assume the man's grief-stricken daughter was part of any sort of plan?

I don't think they actually ever follow up on this, so I guess we'll never really know.

I'm gonna have a go at the riddles which The Riddler throws at Stephanie Brown in Robin (1993) #113. @a-bad-case-of-the-stephs I'm hoping you can help me out, haven't actually read Robin in well over a year.

It's a gift that keeps on taking. It's a theft that keeps on giving. Having a child is the "gift" and when Arthur was imprisoned or estranged, his child was "stolen" from him. When Stephanie came into Arthur's life, he saw her as a "white elephant", but when he no longer had her, he became driven by the idea of her.

One bug is wrapped in a web, therein to die. Another bug is wrapped in its own web, there to be reborn. In a sense, being tangled in a web can be fatal but it can also indicate introspection and growth. Arthur's obsession with leaving clues were often his undoing so will Stephanie preoccupation with her father be her's or will it actually represent reflection and change?

There is a dog in the manger, but it cannot subsist on hay. A manger is a feeder for livestock, typically holding hay; which dogs do not eat. A "dog in a manger" is a person who spitefully refuses to let someone else benefit from (or let go of) something for which he or she has no personal use (dictionary.com). But dogs cannot subsist on hay and the livestock cannot eat with the dog in the manger. If the dog doesn't relent or change, then everyone loses. Stephanie is the dog and her memory of her father is the manger she cannot let go of.

What day of the week has no man ever lived to see? Judgement day. You have to be dead to see it. And they're both very much alive.

The Tiger envies the Oxen but only understands its horns. The Tiger envies the Oxen's power but it only understands power through the language of violence. Steph easily outmatches The Riddler in a fight yet is confused how he still holds all the cards although she attacks him because she only speaks the language of violence.

I am the number you cannot count on your fingers. Edit: he’s saying Steph’s missing the point; you can’t count him on your fingers, he’s not that kind of number.

Would love some input.

[dumplingequivalent]

hey I think I know why old people are insincere assholes the essay

Yknow when you're trying to connect to someone from an older generation, and they gloss over your attempts at genuine connection?

Like when a family member got you a gift that really meant something to you, but when you try to express your genuine gratitude, it seems like they don't really give a shit?

Or maybe you open up and share something personal with an older coworker or family friend along with some advice on a concern that you've been actively worrying about for them, but they don't acknowledge it or even act like they heard you at all?

Something clicked for me today, and now I think it's bigger than Poppop's Just An Asshole Sometimes.

I think there's been a huge shift in western culture around authenticity and genuine expression in the past two decades or so - the way we as a society and culture view it, express it, present it, and respond to it - that's causing minor intergenerational conflicts in our personal lives, but more importantly, major conflicts in our shared public spaces.

Hear me out.

1. Authenticity Then VS Now

2. Authenticity Becomes A Privilege And No One Tells The Boomers

3. Boomer-Meta and Why It Matters

1. Authenticity Then Vs Now

If you're on tumblr you probably understand nuance -

- so I think the concept of "authenticity" meaning something different to Boomers than it does to Millennials or Gen Z isn't baffling to you. it probably feels really familiar.

If you went to a US school in the 2000's, you probably remember the DARE program and anti-smoking and anti-drug ads on TV. And if you don't, you probably already have an idea of what I'm talking about. Things made by adults that felt embarrassingly out of touch to the children they were designed for.

As we all know, these all flopped immediately yet lasted the whole decade. (flopped except for the anti-smoking ads which I'll come back to) In retrospect, these marketing attempts says a lot more about the generation of adults responsible for them.

Things like the DARE program were, pretty transparently, designed to resemble what boomers remembered was "cool and interesting" from their own childhoods. My favorite example is Yello Dino and his video on "Tricky People" that's a painfully obvious homage to Fonzie from Happy Days crossed with Barney that's just as painful to watch.

Watch from 8:03-15:30 or so to see Yello Dino appear and sing a stranger danger song with the Local Kids™.

It's easy to look at this kind of thing and the DARE program and say "of course kids didn't fall for any of this, it's so poorly made; blatantly trying to sell an idea;" etc. But I think the core issue is authenticity.

Remember the anti-smoking ads? Those worked in the end because they featured people who looked like people we knew in person, with real problems from actions they really regretted. And that stuck.

But the Boomer "How Do You Do Fellow Kids" bullshit was never grounded in reality.

The approach they were trying to replicate only worked back in the boomers childhoods because everyone was seen as being genuine by default.

People in real life told the truth unless proven otherwise. Comedians on TV said things to make the audience present laugh. Singers appeared on TV so you could see them as well as hear them. People in ads were selling you a product.

Actors acted like their characters to portray that character "genuinely".

Why would they lie? Their job is to be that character. If they say they like Big Coffee Brand™, you might laugh as it's obviously an ad,

but you also then believed that to be true.

No, really. The section on Fonzie's wiki page bout Henry Winkler's involvement in social issues, titled "Civic Involvement," reads like a social commentary in a dystopian horror. There's little to no distinction between the character and the actor. Henry Winkler is Fonzie, and Fonzie is Henry Winkler.

So if you wanna be like Fonzie, you wanna be like Henry Winkler. You wanna smoke and drink and say what Henry Winkler does, because that's what Fonzie does.

Do you see where I'm going with this?

Now, flash forward to the 2000's.

The police officers doing DARE were (mostly) never thrilled to be there. The anti-weed ads were so exaggerated that they seemed cartoony. Hell, some of them were cartoons, just unfunny ones. And most importantly, we were taught from a very young age that everyone is always lying.

"Never reveal personal information about yourself to strangers or online to protect yourself" turns into "Everyone is lying to you to get something from you" really, really fast.

People in real life aren't to be believed until they can prove what they say is true. Comedians on TV say things to keep themselves relevant and in the rumor mill. Singers appear on TV to sell concert tickets and promote albums. Ads use social issues that affect real people as marketing. Actors are people who are pretty and pretend to be other people in a way that's never convincing, but sometimes if they're feeling generous they'll let you know what they really think and feel.

So, why would anyone tell the truth?

Why should you?

2) Authenticity Becomes A Privilege And No One Tells Boomers

(Thank you for reading this far and I promise I'm don't with the edgy "everything sucks" poetry now)

So now we've all grown up into jaded adults who've been taught to not trust but to strive to "be your unique self" and that creates some weird social dichotomies.

If you want to be truly happy, you must accept yourself and do what you want to do.

....but then you risk being seen as a cringey fuck that gets laughed at on Facebook by your highschool classmates and all of your previous bosses.

All jokes aside, modern society prioritizes a readied public face now more than ever, and that's really exemplified in the Internet celebrity experience. Taking a mild stance on anything generates tabloids attention, and doing something the public frowns upon can ruin a person's career permanently. you're on tumblr, this isn't news to you. you get what I mean.

This consequently makes moments of genuine emotion and expression from these celebrities inherently risky - and thus, a much more rare occurrence. Moments of streamers getting scared by spiders or cockroaches blow up constantly because, I mean yeah sure it's funny, but it's also really REALLY difficult to stage a believable reaction to something like that. And that carnal reaction draws out the desire for connection in all of us. That moment of unfiltered response feels special - a brief glimpse behind the curtain.

And celebrities online know it too. Apology videos, let's plays, streaming - all of this media has a built in sense of authenticity that is vital to making it work. Authenticity is a premium social currency in this space, and that bleeds into our everyday lives as well.

If the most badass and brave thing your idols can do is to be sincere, then eventually, you'll probably feel that way too. It makes sense - sincerity is vulnerable. Choosing to be deliberately honest and emotional when you have no expectation to be is a powerful thing. At least, to most of us it is.

While this is all happening, there's an entire generation of people who are still experiencing the world like when happy days was airing.

Dr. Oz, Dr. Phil, Rachel Ray.......whatever other bullshit they put on TV, all of it begins to make more sense when you focus on their target audience - the middle aged and elderly.

Yes, really. Think of who you know in real life who absolutely loved The Big Bang Theory.

I mean, come on. This image makes me sad, dude.

Humor me for a moment. let's just run with my theory and say middle-aged and older people are all walking around as if everyone is always telling the truth to them.

Is it really that surprising that Dr. Oz was/is?? as successful as he was? As it turns out, believing everything to be true until proven otherwise is incredibly dangerous when applied to medical practice!

While we were growing up, the middle aged and elderly were spending their time being constantly self-absorbed and, just, unapologetically themselves. Which doesn't sound bad in theory, but it's really not as straightforward as it sounds.

3. Boomer-Meta And Why It Matters

So boomers are gullible. the sky is blue. why should you care

The point to all this is that authenticity is very important to modern society, and the difference of what authenticity means and how it's expressed matter drastically when understanding each other is vital.

Boomers were raised to always be genuine. If one believes themself to always be truthful, that lends to forming a bias in their own favor. And breaking the mentality down further, "I always say what I mean and I mean what I say" implies that what was said is what is true. And further, someone changing their "story" is an indicator of deception.

I've met plenty of older generation people who act like sharing their opinion is a gift in and of itself i.e. unwarranted comments on cooking or food, interjected advice about the conversation subject. Similarly, questions about the validity of a statement seem to often be taken as questioning ones morals.

This personal bias is very apparent in interpersonal situations. An attempt to be more genuine with someone who thinks this way would come across as staged and more insincere, and conversely, speaking with a clear bias appears superficial and ignorant.

But the real conflict is how this affects our news and politics. A core misunderstanding of what sincerity is and what it looks like, from either side, is dooms any conversation before it ever begins.

The lack of literacy in each other's values adds so much unnecessary conflict into already divisive matters. The stagnation in the legal progress of important social issues is probably worsened with so many of the US lawmakers being elderly themselves.

I don't have a great way to end this thing, but thanks for reading my weird essay.

The slow realization that a misunderstanding could be at the center of most major political conflict in the US consumed me for like 12 hours today and I appreciate you taking time to read my ramblings.