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white-cat-of-doom · 14 days ago

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Griddlebone Playlist

This playlist is meant to outline the complex (and fundamental) emotion of love, and the pitfalls and joys of chasing after something grand that requires another to reciprocate the affection.

More specifically for this set of songs, the want for love while having the feeling that something is not quite right, either with the other individual involved, or within your own mind. Through isolating oneself into hollow emptiness after heartbreak, and due to feeling devoid of being wanted, it is hard to be vulnerable and let anyone back into a place of emotional attachment.

Did you ever actually feel what 'love' was? Are you really deserving of being loved? After everything, wherever can you find it?

川口雅代 (Masayo Kawaguchi) – Melty

ROMY – LOVE コマーシャル (Love Commercial)

越美晴 (Miharu Koshi) – 恋はファニー��フィーリング (Love Is A Funny Feeling)

宮原芽映 (Mebae Miyahara) – 悪魔のように微笑んで (Smiling Like A Devil)

いしだあゆみ & ティン・パン・アレイ・ファミリ(Ayumi Ishida & Tin-Pan-Alley-Family) – 私自身 (Myself)

麗美 (REIMY) – シャドー・ブレイ (Shadow Play)

竹内まりや (Mariya Takeuchi) – プラスティック・ラブ (Plastic Love)

工藤順子 (Junko Kudo) – 夕顔姐さん (Ms. Yugao)

Meow Meow & Thomas Lauderdale – Hotel Amour

Tracks 1 and 2, 3 and 4, 5 through 7, and 8 and 9, are meant to represent different sections of time in the life of the Queen.

Signature song with playlist: Meow Meow & Thomas Lauderdale – Hotel Amour

Track One: 川口雅代 (Masayo Kawaguchi) – Melty

“ううん･･･････何でもないけれど少し不安になっただけ" ("Ugh... ...It's nothing, but I just felt a little anxious") 知られた分だけわたしから冷めてゆくのがこわいから (I'm afraid that the more you know, the more you'll grow colder from me) "･･･そうよ･･･” (That’s right…”) すき間もない程に昨夜ひとつになったの (Last night we became one, with no gaps between us) しがみついたら微笑うけどどうしていいのかわからない (I smile when I hold on to you, but I don't know what to do) Melty 手を引かれて溶かし溶かされ充たされるはずなのに (My hand should be pulled away, melted, melted, and filled up) Melty つかめないのどうしてかしら? 肩すかしされた気分 (I can't grasp it, why? I feel like I've been ignored) 何にも言わずに抱き寄せて (Without saying anything, I hold you close) 朝の光があなたの景色変えないうちに (Before the morning light changes your scenery) “��やよ” ("No, no") ･･･言いかけてやめるのはうまく言い聞かせるつもりね (...I'm trying to convince you to stop when I say it) 困らせたいの! (I want to embarrass you!) "お見通し” ("Foresight") 小悪魔ぶってもかなわない (Even if I act like a little devil, I can't compete) Melty 手を引かれて溶かし溶かされ充たされるはず充たされるはずなのになのに (My hand should be pulled away, melted, melted, and filled up) Melty つかめないのどうしてかしら? (I can't grasp it, why?) 何かが違ってゆくの何も言わせず抱き寄せて (Something is going to be different, don't let me say anything, hold me close) めかくししてねちぐはぐなこと言わないうちに (Before I get too confused and say something foolish) Melty 手を引かれて溶かし溶かされ充たされるはずなのに (My hand should be pulled away, melted, melted, and filled up) Melty つかめないのどうしてかしら? 肩すかしされた気分 (I can't grasp it, why? I feel like I've been ignored) 何も言わずに抱き寄せて (Hold me close without saying anything) めかくししててね (Please cover your eyes) 朝の光で見えないうちに (Before you can see it in the morning light)

The initial apprehension of being more intimately involved, emotionally and physically, with another person comes with the realization that she felt nothing when it happened. She should be able to feel a deeper connection, but something is not right, and instead pretends and acts accordingly like everything is fine.

Track Two: ROMY – LOVE コマーシャル (Love Commercial)

指の中でタバコふかし何もないのに愛にまみれた (I smoked a cigarette in my fingers and was covered in love, even though there was nothing there) 気にするコトが自分以外のあの人に対する愛の神経 (What I worry about is the nerves of love for someone other than myself) いつか見たあの人はいない私の人にはならなかった (That person I saw someday wasn't the same person I was) 私はなまけてただならぬ犬より (I'm better than a lazy dog) ただの人を選んでみただけ (I just picked a person) 私のコントロールあえてコントロールこわくてコントロールあえてコントロール心に私まかせコントロール (My control, dare to control, I'm afraid to control, dare to control, leave it to my heart to control me) 頭の中でおもいふかし何があるのか夢のざわめき (I wonder what's going on inside my head, The buzz of dreams) ただならぬ人だからあえてこわがってあの人に対する愛の恐怖 (Because he is an extraordinary person, I dare to be afraid of him, and the fear of love towards him) 抱かれる日は心うきあしもうひとりの私かくしきれない (The days when I'm held in your arms, I feel happy, and I can't hide my other self) 私のコントロールあえてコントロールこわくてコントロールあえてコントロール心に私まかせコントロール (My control, dare to control, I'm afraid to control, dare to control, leave it to my heart to control me)

A reflection on not feeling love when, or to the level, you think you should, while worrying how it will affect your partner. There is a comfort in being together with someone, but that surface level connection will eventually face the challenge of it being something more for them, and she is not prepared or ready for that.

Ultimately, it is up to Griddlebone to move forward in the best way that makes sense to her, and that path is one alone.

Track Three: 越美晴 (Miharu Koshi) – 恋はファニー・フィーリング (Love Is A Funny Feeling)

彼は時間に遅れて私は指輪を忘れただけどゴメンも言わずにつまらぬ言い訳ごっこ空は春時は今幸せですと言わんばかりだけど二人の心はちぎれ雲 (He was late and I forgot my ring But we don't say sorry, we make boring excuses, And the sky keeps saying that we're happy now in spring but our hearts are torn apart by clouds) 恋はファニー・フィーリングかまわず回る恋はファニー・フィーリング慣れっ子だけど (Love revolves around funny feelings, but love is used to funny feelings) 彼は口笛吹きながら私ため息つきながら通り過ぎる街角小鳥の歌だけ響く (He was whistling, I pass by with a sigh, Only the song of a small bird echoes on the street corner) いろんなことがあったけどみんないい思い出ばかりだからここらでピリオドそれがいい (A lot has happened, but we all have only good memories, So it's good to have the end around here) 恋はファニー・フィーリング手を振りながら恋はファニー・フィーリング深刻ぶらず歌いながら笑ってサヨナラするわオーファニーオーファニーファニファニオーフィーリングオーファニーオーファニーファニファニオーフィーリング (Love is a funny feeling, while waving, Love is a funny feeling, don't take it seriously, I'll laugh and say goodbye while singing Oh Funny Oh Funny Funny funny oh feeling Oh Funny Oh Funny Funny funny oh feeling)

In a goal to subside the loneliness and longing to feel proper love, Griddlebone moves through relationships over time to find the elusive 'love' she believes is out there. Scared of getting too involved with someone she holds minimal emotion for, she breaks off any connection before feelings develop from the other party, and plays it off as something lighthearted.

Despite her efforts, she cannot find someone who fulfills her inside the way she thinks love should be.

Track Four: 宮原芽映 (Mebae Miyahara) – 悪魔のように微笑んで (Smiling Like A Devil)

罠をしかけ待ってるん悪魔のように微笑んで (I'm setting a trap up and waiting for you, smiling like a devil) さあドアを叩いてドアをひらいて (Come on, knock on the door, open the door) 泣きまねの電話かけて街灯り胸はずませ (I made a phone call imitating crying, and the street lights made my heart flutter) あの人を呼び出したの (I called that person) 数えては時間をかせぐ (Counting the time to buy myself some) 優しさを言い訳して赤い血が流れる前に (Kindness, before I make excuses and red blood flows) 嘘をつくずるいあなた忘れてよあの娘の事は (Forget about lying You're so cunning about that girl) 罠をしかけ待ってるん悪魔のように微笑んで (I'm setting a trap up and waiting for you, smiling like a devil) さあドアを叩いてドアをひらいて (Come on, knock on the door, open the door) 待つだけの女なんてさよならよ今夜こそは (Say goodbye to the woman who only waits, tonight) 愛の糸足にからませあの人をもう逃がさない (I'll let the thread of love entwine around my legs and never let that person slip away again) 罠をしかけ待ってるん悪魔のように微笑んで (I'm setting a trap up and waiting for you, smiling like a devil) さあドアを叩いてドアをひらいて (Come on, knock on the door, open the door)

A new connection with someone shows promise, but she discovers that her partner is a cheater, something that hurts Griddlebone in a way that she has not experienced before. Not used to being treated as a second thought, and feeling like she is not worthy of love if made so inconsequential, she plots to destroy and expose her partner for what they have done to her.

All the joy and hope that she felt in locating a person that is right for her is now crushed, and she vows to not let herself be taken advantage of ever again in the pursuit of love.

Track Five: いしだあゆみ & ティン・パン・アレイ・ファミリ(Ayumi Ishida & Tin-Pan-Alley-Family) – 私自身 (Myself)

ひとりソファーに寝ころんで恋の歌聞くでもなし歌うでもなし (I lie alone on the sofa and listen to love songs, but I don't sing them) 私は日暮れを見つめています (I'm staring at the sunset) 部屋の窓には東京湾の船の灯が小さく揺れて (In the window of the room, the lights of the ships in Tokyo Bay sway slightly) 一人ぐらしに疲れた時は結婚なんか考えてます (When I get tired of living alone, I think about marriage) 夜汽車で旅に出る時は色のない写真のように素顔のままで東京駅から出かけています (When I travel by night train, I leave Tokyo Station with my bare face, just like a colourless photograph) 幾度か恋にこの身を灼いて歌を忘れた私だけれど (I have forgotten how to sing because my body has been burnt by love many times) 淋しさだけを心に積んで今日もぽつんと歌っています (But today, I sing alone once again with only loneliness in my heart) くちづけ交す恋人にさえ私の気持は言えないでしょう (I can't even tell my feelings to my lover who kisses me) 人に知られず流した涙 (The tears I shed without anyone knowing) 私は今日も歌っています････ (I'm still singing today...)

Moving on from her heartbreak, Griddlebone refrains from being involved with anyone else for a lengthy period of time, as that means she cannot be hurt once again. However, she cannot help but feel that the emptiness inside her continues to grow as time passes, even if she tries to remain strong willed. Her thinking is that she does not need anyone to sustain her happiness if she keeps the love she has to give tightly held internally.

Track Six: 麗美 (REIMY) – シャドー・ブレイ (Shadow Play)

淋しい笑顔と言われるのに馴れても (Even if I get used to being told that my smile is lonely) 真夜中��鏡覗けばつぶやくの (When I look into the mirror in the middle of the night, I whisper) Say, Love is the shadow play, shadow play Love is the shadow play 恋しても (Even if I fall in love) Love is the shadow play, shadow play, shadow play ひとりぼっちじゃ怖い (I'm scared of being alone) 街角の華やかさに気がつけば急ぎ足 (If you notice the glamour on the street corner, hurry up) 片思いのままなら恋も失くさず済むでしょう (If you keep your love unrequited, you won't lose your love) Say, Love is the shadow play, shadow play, shadow play Love is the shadow play, 密やかに (Secretly) Love is the shadow play, shadow play, shadow play 遠くあなた見てる (I'm watching you from afar) 気づかないで (Don't notice) darling 壊さないで (Don't break it) wow wow Love Love Love Love Love Love, darling, Love Love Love Love is the shadow play

Her loneliness begins to swell to a point of action, and Griddlebone cannot ignore it or remain dormant for much longer. She is unhappy being completely alone, and wants to feel any form of connection with another, but does not want to be hurt again.

Feeling unworthy of being loved due to her faults, her past pursuit of love becomes less of a task to complete and more of a buried burden she has to carry.

In order to protect herself from emotional suffering, she develops a cold façade to protect herself with.

Track Seven: 竹内まりや (Mariya Takeuchi) – プラスティック・ラブ (Plastic Love)

突然のキスや熱いまなざしで (With a sudden kiss and a passionate gaze) 恋のプログラムを狂わせないでね (Do not cause a malfunction to the love program) 出逢いと別れ上手に打ち込んで (Type in encounters and separations well) 時間がくれば終わる (When the time comes, it ends) Don't hurry! 愛に傷ついたあの日からずっと (Since the day I was heartbroken, I've been having a life) 昼と夜が逆の暮らしを続けて (That's been reversed between day and night) はやりのDiscoで踊り明かすうちに (While dancing the nights away at the popular disco) おぼえた魔術なのよ (There is a magic I've learned) I'm sorry! わたしのことを決して本気で愛さないで (Never love me seriously) 恋なんてただのゲーム楽しめばそれでいいの (Love is just a game, all I need is to have fun with it) 閉ざした心を飾る派手なドレスも靴も (The showy dresses and shoes decorating my closed heart) 孤独な友達 (Are my lonely friends) わたしを誘う人は皮肉なものねいつも彼に似てるわなぜか思い出と重なり合う (The men who flirt with me are Ironically always similar to him for some reason My memories with him are overlapped) グラスを落として急に涙ぐんでもわけは尋ねないでね (Don’t ask me why even if I drop my glass and suddenly glisten with tears) 夜更けの高速で眠りにつくころ (When I fall asleep by the highway at dawn) ハロゲンライトだけ妖しく輝く (Only halogen lights are mysteriously shining) 氷のように冷たい女だとささやく声がしても (Although somebody is whispering that I’m an icy cold woman) Don't worry! I'm just playing games I know that's plastic love Dance to the plastic beat Another morning comes

Relationships become more of a pursuit of pleasure, rather than meaningful connection, for Griddlebone. A cycle of one night encounters to keep her company before the new day begins and she starts over again with someone new. Her self-worth starts to become tied with being seen as attractive and desirable by another person. She has convinced herself that this lifestyle will quell the void inside of her, although she knows in her heart that she is still painfully lonely. The isolation does not cease, no matter how many individuals she crosses path with.

Maybe one day she will not feel this way, but she believes it is her fault that everything turned out the way it has to this point.

Track Eight: 工藤順子 (Junko Kudo) – 夕顔姐さん (Ms. Yugao)

夕顔姐さん部屋には夏でもね (Yugao-san, even if it's summer in your room) こたつが置いてある束ねたコードをつついてる退屈な白い猫が家族 (A bored white cat is pecking at the bundled cords next to the kotatsu table) 今夜のお座敷長過ぎるいつもなら (The tatami room tonight is too long, as normal) 帰ってる時間 (Time to go home) お勝手の隅の猫メシは山盛りで (In the corner of the kitchen, there is a mountain of cat food) とても食べきれない (I can't eat it all) 明かりは点いてても時計の音ばかりそろそろ聞こえて来るはずなのに (Even though the lights are on, all I can hear is the ticking of the clock) 夕顔姐さんの下駄の音 (The sound of Yugao-nee’s geta) 夕顔姐さんの下駄の音 (The sound of Yugao-nee’s geta) 夕顔姐さん来年数えでね六十三になる (Yugao-san, I'll be turning 63 next year) 近頃男はダメだね粋じゃないそれが口ぐせです (Men are no good these days. It's not classy. That's what they say.) 衣ずれの裾は萩の花つい昨日かけたパーマネント (The hem of my clothes was like a clover flower, a permanence that I wore just yesterday) 西に傾いた大きなお月様帰りを急がせる (The big moon leaning to the west hurries my return home) 浮かれ足の男物欲し気な女 (A playful man, a wistful woman) 若いネオンの街にカラコロと (In a young neon city, colourfully) 夕顔姐さんの下駄の音 (The sound of Yugao-nee’s geta) 夕顔姐さんの下駄の音 (The sound of Yugao-nee’s geta) 細い路地に入ると犬達が吠えだす待ちくたびれた猫は夢で聞く (When I enter a narrow alley, the dogs start barking, and the tired cat hears it in a dream) 夕顔姐さんの下駄の音 (The sound of Yugao-nee’s geta) 夕顔姐さんの下駄の音 (The sound of Yugao-nee’s geta)

Years removed from the emotional low point of her life, the empty hedonism to fill the void inside her, Griddlebone has taken up residence with an older, single woman that has mirrored her own experiences in the search of love. The familiar sounds of geta beckon the arrival of her human home to Griddlebone, and her days are spent resting in the sun and keeping busy through the house, all while reminiscing of a past of incomplete love. She has become accustomed to a quiet, uneventful life where she is loved by Ms. Yugao as a Swing pet and taken care of like the beautiful Queen she is.

Still, there is an unshakable feeling that she has missed out on true love in her life, despite her current, content happiness.

Track Nine: Meow Meow & Thomas Lauderdale – Hotel Amour

Fun fact: Meow Meow played Griddlebone in the 2019 movie!

I looked for Love in the beautiful cities I looked for Love up in the air I looked underground though I knew that I shouldn't And still, no Love was anywhere I went to the place they call Heaven I went to the Hotel Amour I sat still and wrote Love some letters But Love doesn't read anymore I sang Love into my stories And I danced Love into my dreams But Love didn't find me Let alone blind me Love is nowhere it seems I looked for Love by pretending I wasn't I looked for Love close to the bone I fixed up some wings and I bought all the permits So Love could take flight when it was grown I followed the maps, I read all the signs I bought Love a building called "Home" I filled in the forms and I paid all the taxes Still, Love left me alone... My heart's still jumping out of my skin I've nothing to keep the feeling in I've nothing to do to make Love stay I've nothing to keep the darkness away You're all in the grandness of little things A leaf that's shaped like a heart A simple breeze, a feather Morning light, evening star And I'm singing to you my stories And I'm dancing with you in my dreams... Love... Love is everywhere... it seems

Throughout her life, Griddlebone has done everything she thought was correct to find and feel a form of love that made her feel complete, but could be deemed as unsuccessful in that pursuit.

Although it never manifested for her as love with another, she has felt the unconditional love of someone that cares for her as the most important thing in her life.

Looking back on her life now as a senior Queen, Griddlebone comes to a realization that love can now be found all around her. It was never her fault for not finding the idea of 'love' that she felt she needed, and there may never have been an instance where she felt that she had found the prize she was after, but love was always with her in the little things of life.

@the-cat-at-the-theatre-door I am not sure if you are still interested in these after all this time, but in case you are, enjoy :).

#CATS Musical #CATS the Musical #CATS Playlist #Griddlebone #Happy Valentine's Day #What better day to celebrate the Cat that (I think) represents love more than any other #And whom I love very much :)#Does any of this writeup make sense? I hope so #It was created with a specific vision in my mind that can be hard to explain to someone not familar with what I mean or the songs I chose #If you subscribe to it #There is an unmentioned theme here in that Griddlebone is somewhat aromantic #But she does not really understand that and thinks that something is wrong with her for feeling the way she does #This idea has been building for quite some time and it is finally complete #Hopefully the drastic(?) shift between the first eight tracks of decades old Japanese music and the recent Meow Meow is not too much #But this playlist was built on the foundation of Hotel Amour as the so-called 'signature song' and everything developed from there slowly #I always wanted to do a playlist that is strictly (aside from the last song) made up of Japanese songs from the late 1970s into the 1980s #As that era of music has really grabbed hold of me and I have made a point of importing and archiving many albums from Japan #From that time period that certainly cannot easily (if at all) be found in North America #Each one of these songs (aside from Plastic Love) was lovingly transcribed and translated by me from the lyric sheets found in each album #The translations may not be 100% accurate for exactly what the Japanese lyrics best translate to but it should be fairly correct #This all started with the album 'Cat' by Mebae Miyahara #And if you look up the album cover you will know exactly why I thought it was something I needed immediately #Next came Junko Kudo's album and then Masayo's and then the next until I now have well over 100 records from the best era of Japanese music #Fun to see that some of the albums I have imported have actually been reissued #While others become increasingly hard to find and more valuable #Interesting to think that I have gone well over three years since posting a playlist #I never did finish the writeup for Munkustrap (half-way done and then I never went back) or Grizabella #Not to mention I have a full 'double album' for Coricopat and Tantomile that has been sitting in my drafts since October 2021 #And technically a fully realized playlist for at least three other characters that I could post if I wanted #They will eventually see the light of day

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