#i hope im not too messed up when the sem starts

[stemacademics]

day 2/7 | 14.07.2024

some trees. not nearly as lush green as I'd seen.

a bit lengthier update, I suppose.

well, hello again! today was only marginally better than yesterday (i am still not greatly proud of myself, not at all) but. we did some work. might not be reassuringly solid, but maybe in the non-newtonian fluid typa tricky solid feeling, i guess?

well. anyhow. more calculus today (of course). but am near the end of single-variable. will start multivariable tomorrow. also a friend texted me saying that they'd finally started their summer internship report that they'd been sitting on for too long, which frankly, kinda called me out in a not-so-great way, but hey, at least there was some extra motivation to drag myself up today. yeah. we haven't been having the best of days these days.

my prof is yet to reply me back for updates about our meeting (my anxiety is through the roof, with a velocity>>>earth's escape velocity; one might assume that that is the point of Numbness but no. No. sometimes i forget to breathe and i panic-press my Violin for the Desolate playlist in sorry attempts to fend off my panic attacks). i also am planning to maybe talk to my old therapist. but i am slightly (Very) nervous about that too. because it is highly likely that he has forgotten me (i saw him last year, around summer. and i'd already done some tough sessions with him. redoing them would be... yeah, even more tough. also. i have observed a pattern; my summers have been Difficult for different reasons each year since middle school, but that's a story for another day. i should come up with a name for that. and no, Summertime Sadness just sounds too good.)

anyhoo. today's focus time was 3hrs and a bit more. yesterday's was 38 minutes. hmm. there's still a whole mighty mountain, sending me into panic. wish me luck guys, i think i might need it.

[seonghwanotes]

henna art | song mingi

pairing: mingi x femreader

genre: fluff, festive related (diwali/deepavali)

word count: 1.1k

a/n: i wrote this on 14 nov 2020 & now it's alr 2021 jshahahs diwali this year is nearing too, like in a week or so & thought i might just drop this here. it's... not my best work but i wanna keep the account going so here it is!!

also, my apologies for being MIA on this account – started uni end of august and it's been HECTIC i didn't really have the energy or the willpower to write but time flies hella quick and im about to be done with my 1st sem so you best believe ill try to get something written soon :) let's hope it all works in my favour & have a good week!

Your eyes were glued onto the television screen, trying to memorise the way the artist was drawing and trying to learn her skills too. You first sketched the simple design on paper using a pencil which worked out fine, but the second you picked up the henna tube, things were the opposite instead.

Henna art was something you've adored since young but you never really got to wear it by yourself since you got it done by a professional instead and they'd charge you a few dollars for that. Plus, you would only be wearing henna during festive celebrations.

Diwali was around the corner and you were excited this year since you were celebrating it with Mingi in a simple manner. It made you feel sad that this was your first Diwali without your family around but ever since you started dating Mingi, he was family to you too.

A smile was plastered on your face as you thought of him, wanting to spend a holiday that's important to you with you and he took a day off solely for that though you insisted there's not much that you can do since you didn't make any sweets as well.

You continued your practice with henna and tried numerous times on paper to make sure you didn't mess up when you drew it on your hand. It took you several tries to master one design and when you did, you squealed out of happiness.

"God, finally."

Placing your left hand on the table, you adjusted your hand position so that you could start drawing your henna. Slow and steady… you were soon halfway done. The flower looked a little off but progress was there. The henna paste flowed out from the henna tube as you squeezed on it, eventually drawing small dots on the back of your hand. A beautiful flower drawing was formed and you put down the tube, satisfaction filling you up.

You smiled at your work, immediately grabbing your phone to take a picture of your hand while the paste was still wet. After you were done, you put your phone and placed your hand in front of your small fan to make it dry.

"And, now we wait."

While you were waiting for the henna to dry up, you lost track of time and ended up using your phone until Mingi came back home. He told you he'd be home by six and it was a quarter past six, making you realise your henna was dried up since you were on the phone for about 40 minutes now.

"Hi baby," He greeted with a smile, pushing his glasses on the bridge of his nose. You ignored his greeting and rushed to the bathroom sink, washing off the dried henna paste. The dark red colour reappeared as the dried paste absorbed the water and it almost looked like blood.

Mingi followed suit and he gasped when he saw the blood lookalike in the sink, worrying you had hurt yourself. "Y/N, what happened? What is this?" He panicked, grabbing your hands softly.

Giggling at his worried state, you felt warm on the inside seeing his concern for you. "Baby, it's nothing. I drew henna on myself just now so I'm washing it off cause I forgot to wash it off earlier."

His hands dropped to his side, "Oh. What's that? What's… Hannah?"

You laughed, "It's not Hannah, it's henna. Wait, do you wanna see pictures? Let me wipe my hands first." You grabbed a towel and dabbed your hand slightly until the water dried up, the henna design standing out on your golden skin.

"Whoa, baby, that's so pretty." He mumbled, taking your hand into his hands, admiring the red colour on your hand. "Can you do it for me too?"

"Huh?"

"Yeah, I want this. Can you draw for me?"

You giggled, "Your manager is gonna scold me for this. It's gonna take a week or more for the henna to disappear."

He thought about it for a second, then nodded. "Yeah, I want it. Let's forget about the management for a while, okay?"

"Okay!" You exclaimed in happiness and pulled him to the living room with you. The two of you sat down and you searched up henna designs on Pinterest for Mingi but you didn't manage to find something that was simple and not… flowery.

You frowned and sighed, "I can't find anything that is not flowery, baby." Mingi shook his head, "I found one though. Look."

He showed his phone to you, a picture of a small heart tattoo shown. "Let's have matching hennas, I'll draw yours and you can draw mine."

Smiling at him, you nodded. "As you wish."

You began your henna drawing, now turning into a hobby, on Mingi's wrist. He flinched a little, "It tickles."

"Aw, sorry, I'll be slow." You replied. "You know what, I've never seen a guy wear henna before."

"Wait, really?" He asked, sitting up straight to fix his posture.

"I mean, I have but it's rare. Some men wear it for their wedding. But, it's cool. It's similar to tattoos anyway, just that it's temporary." You told him.

You finished it rather quickly, for the tattoo he picked was a small and easy one. Your hands were a little shaky but you were done. "Alright, there you go. Is it okay?"

"Holy shit, baby. This looks so good!" He said, his eyes round as he scanned the henna. Grinning, he took the tube from you and held his hand out for you to place your hand.

"Come, it's my turn now." He said, excited to draw on you.

You noticed he was moving a lot so you warned him, "Mingi, careful! It hasn't dried up so it will stain your hand, like this." You showed him your right hand, your palm decorated with red strokes and dots.

"Ah, okay, okay." He said, being extra careful. "Aren't you curious on why I chose this?"

You were focused on his gentle touch, so you hummed. "It's a little different, why?"

"It symbolises us. I'm the big heart, loving you all the time and I'm always keeping you close in my heart with me. You're the small crescent, resembling you - you're small," Mingi explained, pausing to giggle.

You scoffed at his description but smiled after. "In conclusion, I'm always keeping you close to me in my heart."

"Even though the henna is temporary?"

"Even though the henna is temporary. I promise." He said, finishing his henna on you.

You smiled to yourself, feeling thankful and warm inside. "Thank you for being here with me, I appreciate that a lot."

He shook his head, "Don't gotta thank me, baby. The next time we wear this, it better be our wedding." He flashed his cheeky smile at you, making you blush at his statement.

Smiling back at him, you said, "Why wait? Let's get married then."

[okeylokiyuh]

no😭 its must be so hard for you ): ugh the same feeling when the google docs accidentally deleted ur assignment. its the worst feeling ever >:(( but you know what they said every cloud has a silver lining!! don't be too discourage loki, i hope you get back in ur track asap!!

the thing about my password was when i want to log in to my tumblr account my mind went blank like the password isnt there at all😭 and i panicked so i try all the password that the old me might have use but there's no use😹 so i just let it be and totally forget abt it (until recently i recover my password and yeah here we are)

i am doing well! i just finished my second sem of my pre u!! ahh one last sem before i graduated and i have a thought to work before i continue my degree. but my sleeping schedule messed up a little bit since i need to study for my finals and i hang out with my friends until 4am💀

ah, blonde jaehyuk rlly suits him🤩🤩 the pic you sent jdjskdjdj sir i am respectfully looking👁 ah also!! treasure second mini album on oct22!!!!! kdjdjdj my boys are ready to slay😆 cant wait for their new songs tbh

hehe for me jay is my bias rn! boy really made me simping so hard🤥 and recently i just started to watch daredevil on netflix bcs u knoww matt murdock will return in she-hulk and having his sequel on mcu! ahhh im so excited and as a marvel fans i rlly cant wait for phase 5 of mcu!

oof, sorry for the late reply, uni has been hectic lately! hehe, rather than being discouraged i'm just not as motivated, and ig it's bc of the workload i've been getting. plus, the distance between my home and the uni is terrible and public transport is my worst enemy. so those added factors just make it difficult for me to carry out my work as usual.

i totally feel you! i lost my password for an acc recently and tried everything i could, but somehow thanks to the 'forgot password' option, i was able to recover it. i hope you don't forget it again, jaecha hehe

aah! that's wonderful, jaecha! wishing you all the best for your last semester as well! you are gonna do well, i'm sure! oof, i totally relate to the messed up sleep schedule, but for different reasons sksks. i'm glad you are having fun, though! college is supposed be a place to figure yourself out and have fun doing it and i hope you are having such an experience!

yess!!! another treasure comeback! i'm having exams then, so i might have to postpone watching the comeback and the streaming, but i can't wait for our boys to make their comeback with great music as always :D

ooh, is daredevil good? i haven't come around to watching any mcu tv shows other than hawkeye, loki and runaways i think. yesss, phase 5 looks too good, i can't wait to see how it goes! i'm most excited to see the marvels!

but rn, i'm kinda teetering off kpop and into the world of top gun maverick. i watched the movie at home recently and i'm totally hooked on it! i really wanna watch it on the big screen too, but the screenings are at 6pm and 10pm and i'll be damned if my parents ever let me leave the house after evening hours.

[timextoxhajima]

HI DANA I'VE MISSED U SO MUCH😭😭

god i really came back to so much new stuff from u😭😭😭 I'VE BEEN VERY BUSY PREPARING FOR MY THESIS AND MY ABROAD YEAR PREPARATION NOW (literally writing this in the middle of finishing another nasty paper i need to do) SORRY I CANT BE AROUND SO OFTEN😭😭😭 i saw that post of yours and omg im this 👌 close to just sending u a message SO WE CAN BE ACTUAL FRIENDS

anw i wanted to tell you this so much so,,, i actually started writing too🥺 (idk it just become one of my coping mechanism with the amount of stress and pressure i've been getting) i would literally write them in my car on my way somewhere or just in the middle of waiting for something, and i wanted to tell you this because idk your writings always brings so much idea into my head so i've been trying to put it out into real words, so thank YOU for helping me find a new hobby that i could turn to as a coping mechanism when things become hard!❤️

i actually do post them on tumblr (just so i wont lose them) so i would actually creep in ur acc everytime i happens to open tumblr to post something but i really havent had the time to read any of your posts yet even though i've been dying to do so BUT IM VERY DETERMINED TO READ THAT JUYEON SERIES AND RACER HYUNJAE SMUT BY THIS WEEK! (hopefully😭😭)

ANDD this is so late but i'm also so glad that you are back on tumblr!! i know this is a very late welcome back message but welcome back dana!! how about u!!! how have you been? i really hope you've been well ❤️❤️ - 🍋🍋

omg get out IT'S MY LEMON ANON EHSJDJSKJD udk how i live in fear everyday worrying about my anons deactivating or going off tumblr and me never actually getting to know them... i started tumblr and shifted away from aff for the sole purpose of being closer to my readers, not knowing that having anons was a thing and yet now i wake up worrying about my anons disappearing 🥺

udk how happy i was to see you in my ask box cause all i saw was HI DANA I MISSED YOU SO MUCH in my notifs and i was alr hoping it was you, i didnt even read the middle and just scrolled down to see if it was signed off by you 🥺🥺🥺🥺

First and foremost, thank you for taking the time to send this in despite all the work you have to do! You sound so packed and so... busy that i almost feel like i shouldnt be taking up your time omo and im actually very surprised that alot of my anons saw that post about the tumblr hug /crying ugly tears/

Also please dont feel the pressure to reveal yourself! tumblr's anon function is meant to protect yourself and so if you are uncomfy with revealing your blog that's totes fine, i just hope that my anons will tell me if they were gonna deactivate, at least i can say goodbye or smth idk

I'm so proud of you for starting to write for yourself! I'm nothing but honored to have... facilitated you beginning to write and i'm just... i'm in awe at how dedicated you are to making sure you know what's best for you and finding out what keeps you happy and healthy (both mentally and physically)

My posts are in a MESS now, ive recently been dragged into the enhypen circle but as you already know i'm still actively writing for the groups im stanning uwu 👁👁

i'm actually really happy to be back on tumblr after a whole sem. The sem was a shitshow and lots of things happened and so tumblr really was my route for escape when the sem finally wrapped up and i moved home from sch and had time to myself. It's been rough, recovering from all the mishaps in the semester, cleaning up all the shit i left behind w people i've decided to cut off contact with and etc. BUT i've gotten alot more vocal and daring ? To make friends here so that's really nice, to have a community back my ass up or at least be around when i need them. I've made so many new friends and some of them ive exchanged personals with, it feels like a fever dream and i dont know if i can bear to leave if the time comes.

That being said, how are you? have your works been helping you organise youe thoughts and feelings since you said they were your coping mechanism? are you taking care of yourself?

I'll alw be here for you to talk to, even when im inactive for posts, my dm/ask box will ALWAYS be open love 💞 welcome (partial) back, and i hope you meet you soon!!!

[irrelephants]

time for a super duper rambly moment with meenakshi

warning: this post is gonna be an absolute mess

so we’re into the second week of mid semester break. i made a joke before that mid sem break is short for mid semester breakdown but it’s been manageable. did spend some days at the start keeping to myself and chipping away at work and stuff, but lately, i have also spent time in good ol recharge lounge with the squad again!!

have an assignment/report due in a couple days (weird bc the assignment is an online quiz but we still have to write a calc report to submit for portfolio.... rude) and that’s going well now yay! still very shocked that i used an incorrect correction factor AND rearranged an equation wrong, but got pretty much the correct answer!! So even though I fucked up twice, the quiz thinks i only messed up once so i only got penalised like 0.9 marks, whereas other ppl I know are losing up to 6 whole marks. sometimes i’m just blessed like that. and also thankful for my friends for making me realise and then figuring out the correct method with me.

two tests as soon as the holiday ends and i’ve been going into erskine for my daily programming revision sesh which is good. experimenting with listening to diff music before trying the practice quizzes and weirdly my sad mood playlist has had the best results so far looool

haven’t done too much for structures but will smash it out once soils report is done. plus that subject is my fave so i’m not too stressed

lately i’ve felt super distant from everything, and i can’t fucking focus on a thing!! very annoying when i know i should be getting things done but ya girl’s got a lot on her mind :(

so thursday last week i went to a court hearing between Work Safe and the company my dad worked for. that’s one of the hardest days i’ve had in a long time. basically, for those who don’t know - my dad was a welder and died in a workplace accident in june 2017. very shit. very sad. i still cry all the time (heres a link to old post). but yeah, last week was finally the end of the legal process over it. the company had plead guilty last year over breaching things in the HSWA, and last week the court went through figuring out reparations and fines.

it felt quite cold listening to them put monetary values on things that you can’t put a price on. we don’t fucking care about the money. it was hard listening to them try place the blame on someone. but i’ve been waiting for this day to be over a long time, and it finally is. thank fucking god. the lawyers and reps from worksafe were really lovely and helpful. the judge was amazing. he had read EVERYTHING that had been submitted. he was a man with a plan and i have big respect for the effort he must’ve put in. they’d given almost 3 hours for the hearing but he got done in 45 minutes.

after that i went back to uni to try think about less shitty things, ended up having a wee cry in erskine but it was much needed. did i get any work done? nah. and then i had a headache so went home. it was a bit stupid of me to go to uni after that but it pretty much sums up how my critical thinking skills have been lately lol

i feel bad for being the AbsoluteWorst for people to interact with lately but v thankful for everyone who continues to tolerate me. they’re all stars. i have been doing a terrible job of checking in on some of my friends so i gotta do that too.

life is just a massive bitch but mate, i am working so hard to keep going forward. if by some WILD CHANCE anyone is reading this, you might feel the need to worry about me but srsly, i can take it all and still be a positive gal ok. im good

and i mean, everyone’s goin thru something that no one knows about right? that’s why we always gotta be nice :) :) 

today i was at uni, typical morning in central lib followed by afternoon in eng core. got a fair bit of work done. then my friends and i went to scope out the fig trees on campus and eventually managed to find them. v excited to finally try some when they ripen ahhhh!!

tomorrow i wanna bake some more biscuits for my pals and catch up with my fave old coworker so im excited. also want to make a feijoa cake but maybs that’s a better weekend plan. gonna bust out my soils assignment before going to bed tonight too.

this weekend me and mum and are gonna get the fireplace ready for lighting again as well as some GARDENING so i am pumped for that! 

one more thing from this week/late last: I AM OBSESSED WITH MY MENSTRUAL CUP. if you have any Qs at all feel free to message bc i would LOVE to talk about it!!!!!

still doin my best to make every day a good one. hope ur having a fab day too