#i hhaaaated the idea when i was younger that you became a better writer as you get older | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

pynkhues · 2 months ago

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I'm really sorry you and your sister are dealing with that

(no pressure to publish this, not that there should ever be pressure to publish an ask if you don't want to, of course, but just wanted to say I hope you're doing okay)

Ah, thank you, anon, it's okay. It's been a while now (court moves slooow), but we're getting hopefully close to the end. She filed in Family Court December 2022, and we've had about five interim hearings with final trial (finally) scheduled over four days next month, so fingers crossed! But yeah, it's been A Time. He's financially and emotionally abusive against my sister, and both those things as well as medically negligent against their children (who are only six and eight and both have special needs), so it's been....rough. To say the least.

But on a lighter note, have one of my new favourite photos I took of my nephews at the jellyfish enclosure at the aquarium last month!

#i DO feel like i have an honourary family law degree at this point haha #and i think i've got at least three different creative projects that are coming out of it because the levels of insight #you develop #is just #yes #wow #A Lot #i hhaaaated the idea when i was younger that you became a better writer as you get older #like i think i genuinely did have this mindset like age has nothing to do with talent #and i kind of do still think that #i think there are young writers who are wildly good #but it's also impossible to articulate the absolute wilderness that is humanity that you get deeper into as you age #that makes me sound a hundred lmao i'm 33 #but i think in particular there's this pivot point when the people you love start to have families of their own with people who are #so removed from your way of being #and sometimes that's amazing and sometimes that's awful #and what comes out in the wash of that is just a perfect mix of generational trauma AND generational enabling #privilege and expectation and mindsets around familial roles #and the sudden and horrible reveal that you have had children with a man who will be diagnosed a destructive narcissist #and who will reject the idea of your children having disabilities because how could he - a perfect man - father children with disabilities #and will turn all that loathing onto a woman he once said he loved because he decides she is the defective one who gave him broken children #which is literally how he thinks #it's soooo #yeah #anyway my sister is amazing and my nephews are perfect #and honestly it's been special in a lot of ways because y'know i'm a middle child she's my big sister #and we've had a tumultuous relationship over the years but this has honestly made us closer than we've ever been in our lives #and i'm proud of that but i'm really proud of the relationship i have with those little boys #and i think need hope we're going to win and she'll be able to move herself and the boys here even as the odds are stacked against us SO #i WILL also be calling on the universe / heavens / everyone's good vibes next month

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