#i haven't posted here in over a year and yes i did have a mini crisis over it

[ohzone]

*presents sketches*

[evermore-fashion]

Did I make a mistake?

As you're all well aware of I said goodbye to my blogs and Tumblr thinking my decision was final. However after reading all your wonderful messages I started to have doubts about my decision. So for the last few weeks I've been trying to pinpoint why I thought I had fallen out of love with high end fashion as well as Tumblr itself and the answer has been in front of my face for the best part of four years. A broken down friendship that has been plaguing my mental health… until recently and I'm going to finally explain why. I had a best friend for the best part of 15 years that went downhill both slowly and unexpectedly. We met on a forum back in 2005 and hit it off instantly. We then met up and went on various holidays, attended concerts together, did mini weekend breaks away and got to know each other's families really well. More importantly they were the only person in my life who knew about this blog and shared my love for high end fashion. Like most friendships though it had its ups and downs but no matter what we always gravitated back towards one another, until March 2020. A week or so before COVID and lockdown took hold of our lives they told me they had met someone. I was genuinely happy for them, except for the fact they had let slip that I was the last person to know. This broke my heart and their trust as they continued to let slip more details that indicated that I was being pushed out in favour of a new crowd (aka university friends who they had told me they disliked a few months beforehand) alongside their new partner. They stayed with their partner on and off throughout COVID and I was either pushed out the door or let back in depending on their relationship status. The relationship came to an end for good towards the end of 2022 and as always I was let back into their life with plans for 2023 being made. However I held back knowing the hurt it would cause me if things suddenly changed again. This was also my breaking point with them as I wanted to protect my heart from anymore hurt, and I believe this is where my love for creativity began to faulter. Whilst I found my love for gaming I felt this mental block around Evermore-Fashion and Evermore-Grimoire which I thought was down to my passions changing. I was clearly wrong. The friendship was up and down for another six months, until last summer. They had got back in contact with me despite the fact they had started acting cold towards me which manifested in a crap Christmas and Birthday. Yet I was still willing to hear their side of the story, but it never came as they ghosted me and I haven't spoken to them since which hasn't been fun to deal with both mentally and emotionally. Although I now fully believe this is what was killing my spirit and everything I had loved for so long. Anyway fast forward to January 2024, I've said goodbye to my blogs and Tumblr when lo and behold I come across a social media post that changed everything. The ex friend had written something personal that contradicted everything they had told me (over their relationship break up) which not only angered me but it lit a fire under my butt to stop stewing in the "what ifs?" as well as holding on to a small bit of hope that they'd finally apologise for treating me like a piece of shit on the back of their shoe for so long. Not only that but I started to miss why I enjoyed being online in the first place. I checked out Vogue to see what was occurring during Paris Fashion Week and I yearned to share the Spring 2024 Couture collections on Tumblr (even though I still think it's still a toxic cesspit). Yes I could easily start this up on Wordpress or Instagram but let's face it, Tumblr is still the easiest place to start blogging creatively. So here I am. The fog surrounding my love for fashion has lifted alongside the mental and emotional baggage I've been holding on to for far too long. There's just one thing I'm still wondering though… do you guys forgive me (as I feel like I've messed you all around ) and is it okay to come back? 🥹

[agirlwholovesrockstars]

when the clock strikes 12

☆ EDDIE MUNSON'S MASTERLIST ☆

❣ AGATHA'S MAIN PAGE ❣

Summary : while awaiting for the new year countdown, Eddie had an idea to blow your mind

Word Count : it's for the mini fics section soooo lengthwise? probably solid

Warnings : 18+ (MDNI)SMUT‼️Eddie Munson x FEM!reader, language, slight alcohol consumption, reader and Eddie are both (20), slight somnophilia 🫠, aftercare, no use of y/n, reader is slowly waking up and Eddie asks for permission and if you're still uncomfortable with that please don't continue to read, that's just it really

What to Expect : SMUT and FLUFF, Eddie being a silly goose, set in modern era (of course, there's still a touch of 80's in there), UPSIDE DOWN & VECNA DON'T EXIST IN THIS!

Note To Reader : GIF for this because I'm missed seeing him moving on my fics lmao, also the divider is made by me hehe- I'm literally exposing myself out here, please forgive for my salacious thoughts 🙏🏻 (if you know me in real life? no- you don't 😃)

Author Note : I know I've been long gone for a while but I'm trying my best to post new fics as much as I can! there has been a lot of happenings with my life especially we're having a lot of events like family reunion 🫠 (but it's so much fun tho ngl)

The preparation for new year's is going so well

So well, that you haven't realized how tired you really are

You're so productive that you've used too much of energy on yourself for working to prepare for the party

You wanted this to be perfect

You want everything to be settled in according to your plan

Eddie knows that you're always so "serious" when it comes to decoration and especially when there's an occasion

He loves you for it though, you just don't throw parties

You throw the greatest parties all the time and you never missed

All of your friends are in there, Steve, Robin, Jonathan, Nancy, Argyle and the freaking kids that you always adored so much

You looked around at everyone in the room

Jeff and Gareth are bantering at each other with some album, Dustin and Lucas fight over which 80's fantasy film is the best, Steve, Robin and Eddie surprisingly getting along with the same pop music artist, you could see the three of them geeking at each other

Max and Jane do makeover at each other which aches your heart of seeing them so close to each other, it's really so sweet to have a real girl bestfriend like that

"I'm gonna refill your glass" Nancy pasts over to you snatching the glass on your hand so swiftly that it makes you snap out of your head

You slowly trying to register what just happened and you smile finally

"More wine? really?" You say as you watch her fill your glass with wine

"Uh, yeah?" she replies with a dramatical jerk to her head as you chuckle

"But it's only 9pm!" you exclaim with wide eyes but a fond smile on your lips

"are you saying that we should only be drinking when the clock finally strikes 12?!?" she says while she fills her cup, she takes glances at you and back to her glass

"Ah- yes, that! exactly!" you point to her using your index finger as you holding your glass of wine

You could already feel yourself getting drowsy a little bit from the wine

Red wine will always make you feel sleepy

You don't even know if it's the alcohol or you just really need to doze off for a minute before you could scream at the top of your lungs for 2024

You don't even know how many glasses that you already take

"Did we just finished the whole bottle?" You feel the world is spinning on you

Nancy, your bestfriend- raises the bottle in front of you as she snorts at your disapproval look

"Kinda?" she says slurring as she smirks at you

"What do you mean? Kinda?!"

"Hey- woah!"

Jonathan passes by and bless him for his instincts because Nancy would've been knocked her head on the counter as she starts stumbling from her stance, he catches her on time

Nancy giggled as you rolled your eyes in annoyance, massaging your forehead

He saw the look from your face as he chuckles

"She got too far again, huh?"

"Yeah, she always does, Jonathan, nothing's new" you reply as you also can't walk properly

"Wait- don't move- should I call-"

Before Jonathan can finish his words, the voice of your boyfriend booms out of nowhere while Argyle tails behind him, looking at you and Nancy

"Sweetheart- how you've-"

Eddie clocked the wine bottle from Nancy hand

"Did you dr-"

"Don't even try it, Ed's" you placed your palm over his mouth as you stumble forward, he immediately wraps his arms around you as you started pressing all of your weight against his chest making the male laugh as he gently hold the back of your head

"Y'all getting drunk already? It's not even 12am yet" Argyle with his iconic tone, you seriously have no idea which one of his voice is normal

You've never heard him talk in normal voice before so you're used to him having that voice that sounds so freaking high as fuck

But, he's a good bud tho, so hilarious

"Blame her, not me! Eddie tell them!" You defend yourself as you put your chin onto his chest as you look at him with a pout on your lips, he smiles as he ruffles his face against yours making your face scrunch up from his action, he laughs again

"What's with all of the commotion?" Steve arrives with hands on his hips

"The two got their selves drunk again" Jonathan points to you and to his girl

"As if that's new" Robin appears in the corner with her arms crossed leaning against the side of the wall

Steve chortles "Wait- you got hustled by Nancy again?"

You groaned from Steve's teasing "yeah, I always fail to see that, thanks" you say

"I told you, you shouldn't brought the wine here, you moron!" Robin uncrosses her arms finally figuring out where the wine misplaced her eyes widen when she saw Nancy holding it, she snatches it making her bite a laugh as Jonathan also connecting the dots at the scene

He pressed his lips together to not burst from laughter

Argyle watches both of his friends having a fit of unnecessary argument

"I think I need to grab a popcorn for this" he leaves abruptly as he looked at your kitchen cabinets and came back munching in a bag of popcorn, very entertained at the scene

"I-I don't know how she got it!"

"Did you hide it properly!?"

"Look- Robs-"

Robin clicks her tongue as she asks "Nancy, how did you get the wine bottle?!"

She turns around with a lopsided smile as Jonathan steadys her

"I just saw it hanging around but-"

"But?"

"I think Steve" she points at him as she chuckles making the boy winces as he finally remembered of what he's done

"Forgotten about it that he left it out there, soooo" she giggles again making Robin grumble as she raises both of her eyebrows at Steve

"Oh- come on!" Steve runs his fingers through his hair as he decides to turn back leaving all of you

"Hey! don't you walk out on me! I paid for that expensive shit-" Robin follows him as she starts pointing everything on him

Argyle, Jonathan, Nancy and Eddie all laughing at the scene while meanwhile you, Eddie could hear you chuckle a bit but you made a little hum

He draws back his attention at you, he looks down at you

"I think I need to doze off for a minute" you say to him with your sleepy eyes

He smiles as he kisses the top of your head he put his arms around you "Yeah, sure"

Eddie says to Jonathan and the rest that you and him will be out for a while, they all nod and said "Don't be late for the countdown"

Your boyfriend leads you to your bedroom as you throw yourself at your bed as he closes the door walking towards you, you lay behind your back as you stretch your whole body, Eddie chuckles at your tipsy behavior

"I love my bed"

"Yeah, you always do"

"Uh huh"

He snickers "Okay, honey, are you well? are you sober?" He leans down at you

"Eddie- you know the alcohol hits harder at Nancy right?"

"I'm just checking you know to see if my girl's alright" he shrugs as he put his hands inside of his pockets

"I'm very much, okay, eds- I'm sssleepy" you yawn as you feel your eyes dropping until it shuts completely

He chuckles as he shakes his head he leans down as he kisses your forehead you smile at the gesture as it makes you even heavier to fall asleep

Eddie watches you sleep as he stands over at the window

The neighborhood outside is quite a watch, everyone is having fun, everyone is having a blast

The music outside is dull but he can hear all of his friends laughter and the screams of excitement from them

He shifts from where he standing as he tears off his eyes from the outside of your window and goes back at you

You turned on the other side, so you're now facing him as you snuggle against your pillow

Eddie smiles to himself, he feels so good having you in his life

He walks towards you as he moves the fallen hair strand on your face

His eyes softens as he sats down beside you

You stirred up from the movement on the bed as you try to open your eyes, you smiled when you realized it's Eddie

You pulled him closer beside you as he lets you take him laying down with you

He put his other arm over you as you cuddled against his chest almost hugging him in the process

You feel more cozier and even more sleepier than before

The moment you move your leg over to his

Your skirt rise up exposing more bare skin to him, his breath hitches at the sight of it

He looks down at you, he double thinked- maybe- it's a bad idea to do this but he wants you so badly right now

He shouldn't even be thinking that you will get mad because hell-

You trust him

So.....

He starts sinking down beside you, you moved slightly as he continues to do his work

He plants hot kisses over your neck when finds your sweet spot- you hum lightly

He's now on top of you, holding your hips, he's positioning you laying on your back, your head is on the side, still sleeping peacefully

He goes over to your chest, you're wearing tube top with a zipper in front, so he has a access to your bare chest, he kisses more and more

Your body couldn't even register what's going on

You felt hot and cold all over because of the midnight's weather and from your body heating up from the tension that your boyfriend is giving you

You feel him going lower and lower but you can still feel your eyes tired

He watches your soft heaves from chest rising up and down, his eyes darkened when he puts his hand inside of your skirt, he slowly reaches at the hem of your panties

He licks his lips, your skin feels on fire because of his fingertips, your stir from your sleep once again but still not opening your eyes

He doves onto your lips, kissing you, and you hummed as you lazily kissed him back

"May I?"

You move your head onto the other side, you catch a glimpse of the clock, it says 11:20pm

"Ed's, we might get late-" even though, you want him to do it

"Please"

You're not even opening your eyes yet but you can see his pleading eyes being directed at you

"Yes, Eddie, you can have me, take it all" you sank down further making Eddie groaned when his fingers touched your center, it's drenched

He hook his fingers on your underwear along with your skirt discarded on the floor

You shudder at the cool air as Eddie positioning himself comfortably

He smears kisses on the inside of your thighs as he goes closer and closer to your core

You moved your head on the other way as you try to close your legs when you can't help but feel the arousal that's coming in

But he places his palms on the sides of your legs spreading you open as you can feel of your insides burning from his touch

His hands are everywhere, when the moment he swiped his fingers at your core, you released lewd noises as your breathing goes quicker

He licked his finger cleaning it off with his tongue, he grins down at you

He holds your hips as he leans down

"Ed-"

Before you can finish your sentence, he doves down lapping at your juices as you gasp from his sudden action

His eyes are glued to you as he continues to do his work, watching your once peaceful slumber turns into pleasure

He devours you so satisfying that it's making you close your legs, he smirks as you can feel his tongue go lower inside, you mewled

He holds you tightly as you grip on the sheets, he sucked more and more of you until your can feel your legs shake

You can feel his hand reaching on the hem of your top, you slightly open your eyes as you find the zipper as you pull it down

He grunts when he saw your breasts that he worships everyday, you loved the way he admires your body

You're now naked so divinely displayed for him

His free hand kneads your boobs as you moaned, he dives back down as he starts to bully your clit

You can feel your body tremble from the sensation forming up in your stomach

You reached for his hair as you pull it making his eyes grow hungrier and eats you like man starved for days

"Oh- Eddie-"

He carries the back your butt as his tongue digs deeper earning a squeal from you when he reaches the spot that you didn't know it existed

Your eyes are heavy-lidded, you try to watch him but you can't when your brain can't place your emotions whether is melatonin or oxytocin

you're not sure at this point but hella you feel so fucking amazing right now

He abruptly stops and when he does, you finally open your eyes

"Wha- what- don't stop!" You whine

"What about the countdown?" His lips are covered with your slick and his saliva altogether not caring a single shit that it's literally dripping down on his chin

You gasp at it as you moaned, he chuckles darkly, you know what he's doing he's teasing you

"Do you know that you're frickin' beautiful without even trying?" He goes at his usual antics as you beg for him to come back down

"Eddie, please!"

"Not until you see stars"

"What-"

Before you can utter another word, he goes back in but this time he places your legs over his shoulders another spectacular angle making you shiver from his touches yet again

He grips your legs, thighs, arms, your belly, he squeezes your boobs and it's literally fucking everywhere

One thing, you know it's for certain that you really would unashamedly come from his simple touches

He pokes his tongue down on you but when he curled it, you chant his name like a prayer, you have the ability to scream his name without being caught in action inside of the room because of the loud noises from the people and the music

Your eyes burn from the threatening tears but Eddie is not having it, he wanted you to fall apart completely for him

You moaning louder and louder when he swipes his tongue on your entrance when he puts your legs down on the bed

"You're still not seeing it, I see"

"D-Don't stop- please"

He opens your legs again as he resume to his mission, he tongue fucks you as he digs in and out, you squirm at it as he starts picking up the pace as you let out a ragged breath

Goddamn, he is killing you right now, you can already die right then and there heavenly

Your mouth falls open without noise coming out of them as you yank his hair, he growls as you couldn't believe that he could reach every spot inside of you

You arched your back as you start grinding against his face, his eyes flashes devilishly mischief as he didn't stop this time

He laps once more until you cry out his name

You jolted when the fireworks exploded booming the entire neighborhood

You come on his tongue as the same time the fireworks started

Your legs are spent, you feel boneless but a sickly smile is now sitting on your lips

He let you get back on earth for a while as he cleans you up, he dresses you up not leaving single skin left behind without his kisses

"You saw it, huh?" He grins like a devil that he is but you love him, he holds the door open for you letting you first outside

You saw all of your friends jumping on to the music and celebrated very happily

"I did" you admit ignoring the rosy tint on your cheeks "and it was much more better"

"Than?" He throws his arms around your shoulders

"The fireworks" you smile as he chuckles as he kisses the top of your head as he squeezes you to his side

[perhaps-in-anotherdream]

Hi:) I made a post with the same questions I'm about to put in here, but then deleted it since I thought I'll be guaranteed to get an answer if I just ask you.

I've been playing MLQC since its launch. To be honest, haven't kept up with the story in years and only continue playing and logging in to get Shaw's cards, but I do know how the game works like the back of my hand.

A few days ago I saw Sylus for the first time on X, and the minute I did I began to debate whether or not I should install Love and Deepspace. Just so I can see what he's like. He's very attractive, and he seems charismatic and mysterious too lol

However, before I decide to download and make a potential commitment, I want to know a few things first. 99% of my questions are general questions, while the other 1% isn't :P

What's the game like? (gameplay, mechanics, options, daily tasks(?), currencies, gacha, etc.)

Are there similarities to MLQC? (gameplay-wise, content, dailies, wish tree, events, etc.)

The cards come with stories, right? I honestly feel stupid asking this, but I'm just that clueless about the game and how it works lolol

Is the game F2P-friendly? (tolerable grinding, fairness in stocking up on required materials, cost of cards, etc.) Is it at least similar to MLQC in terms of abundance in materials and currency?

Do limited cards get re-runs? Or is it that once a card is launched and its event ends, the chance to get it is forever gone?

Can cards only be pulled, or can they also be run in MLQC-style shoot/birthday events and bought using in-game currency (i.e. like the gems in MLQC)?

There's probably a grade to the cards, correct? (SR, SSR, UR, etc.)

I saw on the store that Sylus's 'Wish' event is ongoing at the moment; will his card be added permanently after the event ends, or is this a one-time thing (like the time ltd. Wish Tree events in MLQC)?

Taking into consideration the fact that I'll be a noob with barely any resources, if at all: do I have a chance of getting Sylus's card before the event end if I begin playing soon?

Sorry for all the questions, and thank you for your response in advance :D

hello! firstly i’m sorry but my answers will only have necessary info b/c i’m not in the physical or mental state to go at lengths rn.

(1) it's an otome with action elements i.e. different styles of combats. there's also main story, dates, socmed, mini games, photo booth etc.

(2) idk whether to laugh or cry here tbh. in all fairness, PG really just took every feature of lovepro/ MLQC and upgraded them in LaDS (the combats aside LOL). although personally i don’t have anything positive to say on their writing quality, so you’ll have to figure out your feelings on that yourself ahah.

the dailies are quick once you've been there long enough as it is with most games. the wish tree has pity carry over system. they have two types of gacha pools: permanent and limited. and the two pools have different ticket currencies. there is no exchange system for event cards like MLQC.

leveling up the cards is an extremely tricky business here by the way. it's gonna become an essay if i try to explain, but know that you can never have enough stamina here LOL.

(3) yes. the 5 and 4 stars.

(4) nope lmfao. even if you tunnel vision one bias, it'd be difficult have all his cards without spending. they do have free 5 and 4 star card events though and those give rewards + the limited events often offer some rewards (in-game), but still it'd be hard if you have crappy gacha luck plus their stupid 50/50 choice in the pool almost never works lol and since the game is a simulpub, you won't have the advantage you have with MLQC to plan out your spending.

a friend of mine has done an overview, so please go through that to get an idea: ♡

(5) give it some time 😂 the game is only six months old. eventually all limited cards are re-run in these sort of games.

(6) no, there's no currency only card like MLQC in the game (at least not as of now). all cards are to be obtained through gacha (free ones aside).

(7) yes.

(8) QinChe/ Sylus has multiple events going on at the moment. there's a limited pool that ends on august 1 and you won't be able to get that one after the event until further notice. and the permanent pool also has a limited mechanism right now that will end after the event. but every other card except for event limited card will be added to the permanent pool afterwards.

(9) the permanent cards can be obtained later too (though definitely will be way harder b/c the limited mechanism for the permanent pool will gone then). as for the limited banner, it depends on your luck 😂 70x is the pity for 5-stars. i can't remember if there was any newbie pity, but since there's no guarantee or exchange, it might prove hard to obtain the card without spending if you have bad gacha luck. :/

hope these answer your questions~

—

[silentwillowwhisperer]

Okay so I counted the total number of notes on all of my posts and came to a grand total of:

839?!?!?

Oh. My. Goodness.

Thank you ALL so so so much!!!!!!! I'm having a mini freakout over here!!!!!

-------------------------------

The MFE pilots and Atlas crew know Shiro as "Captain," or "Takashi" at the friendliest.

They view him as a superior, someone to respect.

Which probably explains why they're so confused about his closeness with the paladins.

Colleen will be speaking to her child about motherly things, and suddenly Shiro will walk over and ruffle Pidge's hair.

Or Veronica will be lecturing Lance about doing something stupid (The other traitorous paladins snuck off and mouthed their thanks towards him for 'taking one for the group.') and suddenly Lance will call out. "Hey Shiro!" before bro-hugging him.

They finally ask about it one day in the lounge when the majority of the Atlas crew and the paladins -even Keith- are all just chilling after a long battle.

Shiro is watching the paladins (read: Keith, Lance, and Pidge) play each other aggressively on the gaming console that Pidge apparently installed into the ship.

Shiro goes to grab them snacks because he's awesome like that.

When he hands said snacks to the three gamers, they all chorus, "Thanks, Spacedad," creepily in sync.

Everyone turns immediately in shock.

Of course, they had already figured out that the members of Voltron are very close with Shiro, but not that close.

Sam Holt feels slightly replaced.

"What is going on? Where is your military hierarchy?" Griffin pipes up.

Shiro is not AT ALL fond of Griffin. Yes, Keith did let the first punch fly when they got into that fight at the Garrison all those years ago, but Shiro will hold a grudge against anyone who dares hurt his baby physically or verbally (and James did both!) and therefore believes that Keith was at least 80% justified in his act of aggression.

WOW, that was a long sentence.

So when Shiro responds as neutrally as possible, it's with a slightly upturned nose and a dignified tone of superiority.

"I gave up trying to stop them a LONG while ago. I've come to terms with it."

Hunk walks in at that moment.

"Hey guys! Are we talking about Shiro's nickname? 'Cuz we gave him a shirt with 'Spacedad' written across it in sparkly letters last year for his birthday that I particularly like."

The other 3 paladins present nod mindlessly as they continue to battle each other virtually.

Shiro gives everyone a look that says, 'See? Totally normal.'

"It's the only way I can keep them in line. They threaten each other saying that they'll call their 'dad' which is me if you haven't figured that out yet somehow, and it actually works most of the time."

Lance snorts. "Yup. Spacedad's gotta do what a Spacedad's gotta do."

Shiro gives him a look.

"Okay I might have to smack you with a pillow for that one."

Lance squeals and wraps his arms around Keith for protection, causing the boy to startle and drop his own controller.

Pidge finally pulls ahead and wins. They jump up and crow out victoriously, "YES! In your FACES you crap-eating WEBLUM FACES."

Keith groaned and leaned back into Lance's chest (because Lance is tryna be sneaky and is therefore taking this as his chance to trap Keith securely in his arms).

"I blame this on you, Spacedad. I have to let Lance and Pidge braid my hair now."

------

I just added Spacedad to my computer's dictionary so that it would stop trying to spellcheck me. This is how you know that I'm truly way too into Voltron. Oh, well.

[paper--moons]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

So I was tagged by @agerefandom for this fun little game. Thanks for thinking of me! Seeing as how a lot of these questions are AO3 focused and a bunch of my agere writing is here on Tumblr, I may blend my answers a bit. Hope that's okay! Anyhow, going to pop this under a readmore so as to not clog anybody's dash. 🌙

1.) How many stories do you have on A03?

On my primary AO3 account I currently have four public works and six private works, though I've published quite a few more on the site under a different pseud. And then I have many headcanon posts/ficlets here, of course.

2.) What's your total A03 word count?

My total AO3 word count is 51,743 words (again, that is just for my primary). Comparatively, the word count for my little old blog here sits at 145,222 words! (Not including my minis, that's just my big posts.)

3.) What fandoms do you write for?

Whatever speaks to me, really! If it's something I'm a fan of, there's a good chance I've got WIPs and scraps squirreled away in my files for it. Whether those ever see the light of day is another story entirely however haha.

4.) Top 5 fics by kudos?

Going to do another split answer here—my top (public) fic over on AO3 is Being Okay. My top blog posts are regressor!Zuko, regressor!Peter Parker, regressor!Bruce Wayne with cg!Clark Kent, and regressor!Shigaraki Tomura with cg!Sako Atsuhiro.

5.) Do you respond to comments?

Always! Unless some terrible, ill-fate has befallen me (migraine or some such), I make sure to respond to people's comments.

6.) What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I believe the angstiest ending I've written is for one of my private works tbh. Whether I'm writing fanfic or original work I tend to gravitate towards themes like the loss of self and what it means to be changed. Change can be good, yes, but there's always grief there as well.

7.) What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

This is a harder one to answer, given that the happiest/fluffiest stuff I write is for the blog and even then I skew towards hurt/comfort. Maybe Taako on Board? That one I tagged as fluff at least, but it's a few years old now so it isn't the greatest.

8.) Do you get hate on fics?

Mm, not particularly? I did receive a rather rude comment the other day, but I just blocked and moved along. I have received a few "kys" messages over my agere works before, though it's been awhile since the last one.

9.) Do you write smut?

Indeed I do! Though perhaps not in the most traditional sense? Flashing my ace card here. When I write smut the focus is more on the sensuality and emotions rather than the physicality of the scene since that aspect doesn't exactly appeal to me. But none of that is posted here, of course.

10.) Craziest crossover?

While I'm not against crossovers, I personally haven't written any. I've certainly come across some neat ones though!

11.) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not in its entirety, no. Though I have had scenes and ideas clearly lifted beat for beat, with the person admitting they "saw the idea around but couldn't remember where" despite it being a small community back then. But hey, it's fanfic. They can play in the space all they like as far as I'm concerned.

12.) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Funnily enough, I have been approached quite a few times over the years about having one fic or another translated or made into a podfic. Each time I've given the go ahead, but nothing ever came of it.

13.) Have you co-written a fic before?

No, not unless you consider rp as co-writing a fic. Which personally I feel like it counts? It is co-writing.

14.) All-time favorite ship?

Oh, a real toughie! There are so many... I enjoy Erasermic, obviously. Really any combination of the rooftops (all four of them), as I have always been one to polyship. I've been reading a lot of Kazumaji lately though. And then there are the classics that will always have me, like Vegebul.

15.) What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

All of them haha. But really, out of my fanfic WIPs I think I'd like to finish the one that's closest to being AO3 ready. Which is (perhaps unsurprisingly) a regressor!Aizawa fic. Featuring things such as quirk shenanigans, a well-meaning yet meddlesome Class 1A, and cg!Yagi. The draft is at 21,131 words, but I just can't settle on an ending.

16.) What are your writing strengths?

Probably my ability to establish the mood of a scene? I've been told I'm very good with creating things like suspense or an unsettling atmosphere in my original works (which are quite a bit darker than what I post here, naturally).

17.) What are your writing weaknesses?

While I am forever honing my craft, I feel I always struggle with endings and perhaps always will. Also, I worry over my dialogue not sounding natural enough, or not having nailed the correct character voice. Pacing is another thing that I tend to fuss over quite a bit and tweak constantly. And I tend to operate in a cyclical manner rather than a linear one, which Western culture does not particularly favor.

18.) Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

This is pretty situational imo. If the POV character doesn't understand the other language, I tend to focus on how the words are being spoken (gently, harshly, etc.) to convey the meaning/emotion. However if it is something they speak, then I tend to indicate in another way the language they are using has changed (so typically through italics and dialogue tags). But some words and phrases don't necessarily have a one-to-one counterpart in English, and so those should be kept as is.

19.) First fandom you wrote in?

The first fandom I wrote for was Batman, I do believe. Published my first drabble of a fic over on ff.net when I was somewhere in the ballpark of 13ish. It was pretty agere adjacent, too. Iirc it was a little fluff piece with Bruce and Dick centered around the concept of bedtime.

20.) Favorite fic you've written?

Wish I could tell you, but it's a secret! As for my posts though, I think one of my favorites is my regressor!Cody Walsh, or maybeee my regressor!Okuta Kagero. I'm also very fond of my cg!Gildarts Clive post, though all of my creative works hold a special place in my heart.

[manonamora-if]

May Check-In

This is a bit late, because I've been debugging the past two days.

So I bought Tropico 6 during the last Steam sale. If you haven't seen me posting for a while, blame by wish to be a benevolent dictator of a fake Caribbean island.

Onto the usual index:

Recap of last month’s progress

IF Events in the Next Month (I won't do this anymore)

Plan for the next month

Still long post under the break. If you want a mini version, head on over to itch.io as usual!

April Progress

From last month, what did we do:

Play more games: ✅

I started so good, finishing reviewing the SeedComp! entries, as well as the Revival Jam and had started on the Spring Thing... then I got distracted by the TALJ and Tropico... I also need to update @manonamora-if-reviews at some point... It's at least 100 reviews behind.

Finish the Code of Ch5✅ of Harcourt and edit the Ending Chapter ✅

YES! IT IS DONE! I have finally fixed those godamn doors in the maze that were giving me so much trouble. Also MelS has gotten my edits on all the Chapters/files (and was given extra comments because I also fixed some code in previous chapters). He is hard at work dying editing the missing text.

The only thing left for me is to: - add the maze visuals (map, book/letter formatting) - settle on a design for the final maze puzzle (need to so some research) - include the missing chapter/text (waiting for MelS)

Finish fixing The Roads Not Taken. Or An Eggcellent Preparation. Maybe the other parser too (it just needs a smidge of polish).

LOL... This is the shameful failure that is following me around, ringing that darn bell.

Should i give up on it? Maybe one day...

Complete the TALJ entry. ✅

I have been battling this one the whole morning trying to fix so many bugs. But I'm pretty happy about it. For one: it was actually tested by someone (not like last year). For two: it's actually an easy parser (like you can't lose!).

And the idea had been ringing in my head for so long, I had the prompt submitted to last SeedComp!.

But yeah, this had been happening for a while already. And even though it doesn't have the level of polish I had hopped (future me problem with updates), it is probably one of the better one I've made.

Anyway, play Lysidice and the Minotaur (I'll have an official post tomorrow). (and you can vote for it if you want...)

What else happened this month????

Well, the SeedComp! ended, so I had to deal with all the admin, and making the cool stickers for the different entries. That took quite a bit of time... but worth it! Some really cool entries this year, yet again!

Well, this is more of it's been done last month but released this month: Les lettres du Docteur Jeangille has been translated into English, for the Spring Thing (in the Main Garden, if you feel like voting for games). You can find the post there!

I've been also drafting some post-mortems, one for Jeangille and one for Lysidice. They should come out during the month, at some point.

:/ I have to update my website again now...

I wanted to do an entry in the Dialogue Jam, but my idea didn't pan out on time (too buggy for release). Or eer... cough cough... I had enough will power not to do it? Anyway, also I made the Really Bad IF Jam, which starts today!

What’s happening in May?

As mentioned at the start, I'm dropping this section from my check-in. First, it's buried deep in a wall of text, so no visibility (it should have been a separate post, oh well). If people actually check the events out, I'm sure it would be a miracle.

But mainly... a zine has popped up recently, specifically about IF called What's New in IF? (@if-whats-new), releasing weekly. Since it includes events, like the jams/comps/conferences I used to mention here (and it looks more sleek than a Tumblr post), I'll just leave them do all that hard work instead 😅

So yea... as long as the zine is happening, I'm out 😅 Well, I'll drop them links to my jams and stuff I see, because they seem to be looking for help in finding stuff.

The PLANtm for May

I'm playing Tropico, so I'm getting and will probably going to get less stuff done. Which is not a bad think. Breaks are important. Will I go on a break this month?

Probably should...

But if I don't, where's what I hope to do:

Play more games: On my juicy list I have: the Spring Thing, the newly released Dialogue Jam and TALJ, the Locus Jam and Really BAD IF is happening this month too (so more gameses!), and a few non-comp releases I've had my eye on.

Code Chapter 6/Endings: I need to wait for MelS for this, since he's editing my comments. I'll prob look for visuals for the puzzle in the meantime.

Fixing an older games. Instead of new, do something old.

Write the next Chapter/Scene of a WIP, because it would be good to actually do that. And make some actual progress at seeing stuff being done. (I want to write some Razac snippets....)

Let's have a boring month!

~

The 2024 To-Do List:

LOL, I've only done the website! :D

The hopefully maybe easy to handle To-Do:

fix the bugs in EDOC + overall the French version to match (waiting for Adventuron to get the French language)

fix the bugs of TRNT + find a way to add the missing pieces (giving up on the translation)

fixing the interface of LPM and the popups + check animal interactions

figure out the One-Button JavaScrip/jQuery issue...

edit the loading screens of the completed tiny games to include the program/format logo at least.

The 'Need a Bunch of Content to update but it's planned!' To-Do:

Update my website (bunch new title - also I don't think the logo clicky thing work...) + redo my itch page

Finish TTATEH (MelS dependent)

Finish Exquisite Cadaver (half-way mark by this summer - manif)

Finish P-Rix - Space Trucker (main path at least)

Update CRWL (it's been almost two years... I'm ashamed)

The Unlikely But it Would be Dope To-Do

Finish The Dinner as it was planned (and translate)

Finish In the Blink of an Eye as it was planned (and retranslate)

Finish The Rye in the Dark City

Fixing TTTT (at least fixing, maybe try adding some storylets)

And finally The 'It's impossible, but one can wish' TO-DO:

Remaster SPS IH (if I managed to start this after completing the rest... I'm going to eat a whole sheet cake).

Start the IFComp project (2025? Might end up being a ST?)

[alarrytale]

I understand what you are saying about protecting other Larries and yes I agree but that being said I also see what the previous anon was saying. Regardless of a small rise in people interested in Larry since Liam’s passing, there’s been a wave of Larries leaving the fandom and turning neutral for awhile. Part of it is ex-Larry neutrals pointing out inconsistencies but another is seeing some of these more intense theories which then makes people question things that have been Larry lore for a while. Many of them are behind these Liam theories also. I almost feels like this theory intensive group is pushing other Larries away. I haven’t changed my thoughts on Larry but I also have distanced myself from being vocal about it and I’ve just been concentrating on the music because that does bring me joy regardless of the discourse. Sometimes people can just be their own worst enemy and unfortunately I think that’s what has happened here. That’s why between that one Twitter account debunking all of the bbg masterlist that has been around since the beginning, some Larries creating pretty outlandish theories, plus neutrals pointing out inconsistencies on a continuous basis, Larries are leaving and becoming more neutral/ot5/solos. (I will always think of them as ot5). Louis’ solo/neutral fan base has increased to the point where I don’t think Larries are making as big of an impact as they once did. I think that explains why the amount of likes/comments/reposts of that Twitter post saying Louis & F are copy & paste and another one saying mini Louis has over 135k for one and almost the same amount for the other. It’s just how it is now. Im speaking of just Twitter. I don’t have tik tok. It’s just something I’ve been noticing as time has gone on here.

Hi, anon!

I guess i just don't understand why other fans speculating and creating theories are turning other larries away? Because larry is real regardless of the new theories people make? The old, solid evidence should be more than enough to convince people. Are people forgetting why they're larries, are their foundation of belief so weak, that they're riding on people making new theories? Are they only larries because other people are larries? Haven't they done any independent research and looked into it themselves and decided what theories they believe in or don't? Do they not understand that there are so much evidence that even if some things are debunked or there are some things you don’t believe in, there's still an overwhelming amount of evidence pointing to larry being real. Making it almost impossible to come to any other conclusion when you put things in the right order and in the right context? I know it's easy for me to say, because i was there for almost all of it, but still?

Also, what do you mean by larries are leaving. They no longer believe H and L were ever together or they believe they were, but no longer are? Or are they leaving the larrie fandom because they don't agree with new larry theories and don't want to be associated with certain types of larries? So they call themselves neutrals? If it's the last one, then honestly good riddance. You call yourself a neutral? That means you are open to the fact that Louis is dead beat dad exploiting his own kid? Or is it just because you're a weak larrie who are too lazy to do your own research and think for yourself, independently of others? I can't decide what's worse tbh.

I agree that there are a lot of fans who believe L is F's father. Remember it's been almost ten years since that stunt started. A lot of new fans have entered the fandom since then. They weren't there to experience the fakeness live like we were. They only know the gaslighting they've been exposed to and the current narrative. No larries are trying to debunk bg anymore, it's not a focus, because it's so obvious to us who's been here for ages that L is not F's dad.

I do disagree on us larries not making as much of an impact as we used to. We are, we're just dormant rn. Everything's been debunked already. Either you believe it or you don’t. There is no room for neutrals. If you go from being a believer to not believing anymore, i can only assume the foundation for your belief was not strong. It was based on other people's belief and rumours.

I think this all can be solved by everyone referring to themselves as "neutrals" doing a mandatory 101 larry course to refresh their memory and get their head out of their ass. Let's start with the larry bible.

[super-ion]

Ion & Emily - Ion's First Night Out

(Ion & Emily master post)

It's just my luck that the bank I decided to hit on my very first night out is already in the process of being robbed when I get there. I gotta admit, they're doing a pretty good job. They've disabled the silent alarm, cracked the vault and have already loaded several bags with cash by the time I get there. I was hoping for just a clean robbery, but I guess tonight is gunna be baby's first fist fight.

I don't *need* to fight them. I could just go find another bank. The thing is, I scoped this one in particular out. I spent all week planning this, I'm hyped for it.

And I had a contingency section in my planning binder for this, so I'm prepared. Technically the contingency is "non-lethal countermeasures for security personnel", but I figure there's enough overlap that it doesn't make a huge difference. I pull the security cameras back online, but route the signal into the equipment in my backpack.

Yes, I'm recording this. If it goes badly, I can play it back later and see where I went wrong. If it goes well, I can edit it all together and post it online for my grand debut.

I've also got three mini drones with me, I unclip them from my belt and let them loose. Between the cameras and the drones, I count three guys. I can take three guys in a fight, right?

First guy goes down before he even knows I'm there. I hit him in the back with the electrified gloves I cobbled together this week. I'm honestly actually kinda surprised I even got close enough to do that.

Second guy takes a little more effort. He shouts and takes a few swings. I think tech powers may have sped up my reflexes just a tiny bit, since I manage to avoid him long enough to get another shock in.

Third guy… oh shit!

One of my drones pings me with an urgent alert. I fall to the ground and roll behind a desk as the gunshot rings out. The bullet smacks into the wall right in front of where I was just standing. Not gunna lie, I'm fucking terrified, but I did plan for this. Looks like this is baby's first gunfight top.

I send my drones swarming around his head like angry hornets, tagging him is the face with spray paint as they buzz past. He flails wildly and I slip in and deliver a shock that crumples him to the ground.

I stand there, panting for a moment. Holy shit, I did it. I won!

I stride over to one of the pile of bulging duffle bags. I'm pragmatic, I know I can't carry more than one of them out of here. That's fine, I don't actually need the money, I'm mostly just doing this for funsies. I unzip one and holy wow, there's gotta be at least a couple hundred thousand bucks of cashy money in here!

My feeling of victory is cut short by the sound of someone slow clapping behind me. I whirl around and… aw fuck.

It's Jackrabbit in his gray and white supersuit. He's the local speedster and a card carrying member of the league of superheroes.

I do not have a contingency section in my binder for an encounter with a superhero. I was hoping to work my way up to this. You know, hit a couple banks, build a reputation and an arsenal… maybe actually put together a binder for actually fighting another super.

"Good job, kid!" he says, folding his arms and leaning cockily against a column. "For a moment, I thought you might need some help, but you handled yourself pretty good."

Kid?? This guy is like five years younger than me.

"I'm twenty-seven," I say flatly. Probably not the smartest move, but he's got my ire up.

He flashes a smile that I think is supposed to be disarming. I'm not disarmed.

"Sorry," he continues. "I haven't seen you around and you got the whole… newbie vibe going. I mean, you are wearing cosplay."

I don't say anything, I just glower menacingly as my mind races. He's got speed. Even if I do have heightened reflexes, they aren't going to count for shit if he can take me down faster than I can blink.

"You know," he says, running his eyes over my costume in a way that makes me feel dirty, "we've got top notch tailors at the Tower. We can hook you up with all the best gear if you join up."

"Yeah, not interested," I reply.

He snaps a finger and makes a face of mock annoyance.

"Yeah, I kinda figured, the way you got that bag in your hand. But you know what they say, villain and vulture both start with V."

The fuck? I very much doubt anyone in the history of anything has said that. I think it's supposed to be a joke, but… what??

Okay, focus. What do I got? Tech powers. What's he got? Super speed… and a whole lot of super high tech gadgets. He's got two way communicators. He's got a full wraparound visor with an AR HUD. He's got… some kind of electrostatic friction control in his boots. The security on the devices isn't half bad, but I've already found several exploits to open up a back door.

I've got the beginnings of a plan and the means to execute it.

"Tell you what," he says. "A pretty girl like you doesn't need to get beat up on her first heist. You leave the money and walk out of here, no fuss. All you gotta do is tell me your name."

My… name. I don't have one yet. I have a shortlist of my favorites, but I haven't settled on one. The camera's are running though. I guess it's time for some villainy. I draw myself up and strike a dramatic pose, checking myself in the camera feeds. I turn up the brightness of the led strips in my costume, bathing me in poisonous green.

"No deal," I say imperiously. "But I will give you my name. It's Ion."

He cocks his head in confusion.

"So what?" he asks. "You got like electricity powers or something?"

Yeah, I probably could have gone with a different name more in line with my abilities, but Ion spoke to me in the moment and I'm committed now. All aboard the Ion train!

"Not exactly," I reply and trigger the worm I've installed in his gear.

Okay, full disclosure: my plan is cowardly. I have no illusions about that. That's the great thing about being a villain though. I don't need to be heroic. I don't even need to win. I just need to escape with my bag of money. All other considerations secondary. Crew expendable.

Just kidding, if I had a crew, they wouldn't be expendable. They would receive fair pay with excellent benefits and two months paid vacation.

Anyway, the worm activates and he's completely locked out of his visor as the video plays on his HUD at full opacity. His earpieces are dialed all the way up (not enough to cause any permanent damage, I'm not a monster) and the music starts blasting.

He shouts in alarm and rips the earpieces out. The volume is up high enough to hear the dulcet tones of Rick Astley as they clatter to the ground:

We're no strangers to love

You know the rules and so do I

A full commitment's what I'm thinking of

You wouldn't get this from any other guy

His earpieces are out, but the video's still going on his visor, effectively blinding him. He wants to take it off so badly, but there are too many cameras and he's too well trained to reveal his secret identity like that. You might say he's… he's never gonna… okay, I'll stop.

At this point, I'm sprinting for the door. Against a speedster, every second counts and if I can make it outside, my chances of escape improve significantly.

Jackrabbit shouts after me. For good measure, I have my drones splatter paint on his visor before zipping after me. They'll never catch up at this point, but at least if they make it outside, they can stash themselves somewhere until I can recover them.

The last thing I see through the security cameras before I cut the feed is Jackrabbit falling flat on his ass. My worm's last parting gift is overriding the friction controls on his boots. I guess he uses it for improved maneuverability or something, but for this glorious moment it belongs to me.

I burst out the door into the alleyway. My lungs are already burning. I'm not in bad shape exactly, but I'm also not in great shape either. I can't keep this up, but the important part is I'm outside.

You see, the great thing about a modern city is it's absolutely full of traffic and CCTV cameras. They're everywhere, watching everything. But Ion, you might ask, how is that a good thing? Can't they just see me wherever I am? They can. They can also see everywhere I'm not. I've deployed another worm into the internet of things and it is already creating dozens of phantom versions of me running in every possible direction. It's not going to hold up to any kind of human scrutiny, but I have a hunch it's more than enough to trick any AI that will be tipping Jackrabbit off. Denial and deception, baby!

I round the block and duck into another alley where I hunker down behind a dumpster and wait.

Boom! There he goes like a bat out of hell. I don't care where he's going as long as it's far the hell away from me. I heave a sigh of relief and begin digging through my backpack to change out the more obvious bits of my costume. After a few moments, I'm just some girl on her way home from the gym. I pop in my headphones and make my way to the nearest bus stop with a bounce in my step.

I did it! I freakin' beat Jackrabbit on my first night out! I lose myself in the euphoria and let out a whoop of victory. My fellow late night commuters glance at me curiously, and I duck my head in apology. I can't stop grinning though, so I do my best to play the part of a perfectly normal citizen who just got the best news of her life.

I'm anything but perfectly normal though. My life will never be perfectly normal again.

Look out world! Here comes Ion!

[galacticlycoris]

Hi @galacticlycoris As I am starting to get used to Tumblr (as this is my first social media account), I am enjoying doing these Q&A things! So, I thought it would be fun to ask some friendship questions to you, as you seem like a very lovely person!

1. What is your favorite season and why?

2. What is your favorite genre of music and why? (If you have one, what is your current favorite song/artist?)

3. What are your favorite top 5 relationships you ship?

4. What is your favorite book genre and why? (If you have one, what is your current favorite author/book?)

5. When did you first get interested in drawing? How did it come about? (Your drawings are so cute and you can see that you have great talent in drawing, by the way! 🤩)

Thank you for taking the time to read this!

Thope we can become friends in the near future as I follow you on this platform! ❤️❤️

Hello to you, and to new followers who know me only from Tumblr! You can call me Shuuya! I used to post my art on Twitter only. Although I haven't been drawing much lately (most of the stuff I've been posting here recently are older art), I'm hoping to draw more next year and be more interactive over here. So please don't hesitate to comment, send asks, etc! (｡◜‿◝｡)

1. What is your favorite season and why?

We only have summer and Lots of Fucking Rain where I live lmao but I've experienced spring and autumn in my travels and I think I like spring the best!

2. What is your favorite genre of music and why? (If you have one, what is your current favorite song/artist?)

I wouldn't say it's my favourite, but I do listen mostly to pop? This year I got into Stray Kids! I've been listening to their latest mini album MAXIDENT a lot recently.... but since it's Christmas season, I recommend their song 24 to 25! "((∩´︶`∩))"

3. What are your favorite top 5 relationships you ship?

I dont really have "top" ships, I dont think? Uh I guess we can base it on ships I drew a lot for throughout the years... xicheng (mdzs), emuhiiro (kr exaid), sarumi (k project), wenzhou (shl). there's also da qing/ye zun (guardian); while i haven't drawn them as much as i have the others on this list, it's a very special ship to me ꉂ(ˊᗜˋ*)

4. What is your favorite book genre and why? (If you have one, what is your current favorite author/book?)

hmmmm I guess I like fantasy stuff? My favourite books is Howl's Moving Castle. Recently I finally read The Song of Achilles and Circe! I highly recommend, even though both broke me 😭😭😭

5. When did you first get interested in drawing? How did it come about? (Your drawings are so cute and you can see that you have great talent in drawing, by the way! 🤩)

Thank you! I've always been interested in drawing since I was a kid because I have always been into anime and stuff like that? I drew a lot in high school, stopped during uni, and picked it back up seriously sometime around maybe 2016? (yes, i am old lmao) Although we had art classes in grade school, we weren't really taught about the things that would actually make a difference in your art, like the type of paper to use for certain mediums, etc. So when I decided to pick up watercolors as an adult, I had to learn from scratch. Thankfully unlike when I was a kid, there's now an abundance of information on the internet.

Thanks for the questions! I hope you found my answers interesting. I like these q&a stuff but no one really sends me anything and I'm a p boring person anyway, no juicy story to share around here hahahahaha

[namelessmewmew]

Old Art Archive Part 5.

Original captions under the cut.

1 - 3. Title: Petals, Sparkles and Unicorns [+ bonus of the other two pieces I have of her, that also happen to be old, left being newest of said two]. More csp testing stuff. Went a bit ham with its built in decoration brushes, Petal Brush, Grass Brush, Sparkle Brush [There's even a glitter brush, which I'm sure I will use at least a few times] ……. Happy enough with how this came out. Def need to draw her more.

4. Title: The Heart of My Eye. Uni stuff has been getting more hectic so haven't been able to draw as much [and what I have been drawing has been stuff that won't see the light of day until late this year probably]. Had the idea of a loveletter head character so just made this in csp, don't really like how this came out but oh well. Also probably going to redesign them a bit whenever I draw them again.

5. Title: The Imp Stick. Redesigned Nameless because I wanted to make him more self indulgent [I like horns, imp tails and faceshadows alot]. Used my usual method of exporting each frame as a image and then throwing them into ezgif, I think I should learn how to use clips built in animation abilities.

6. Title: Don't cry over spilt glitter. Uni work busy and hard, and been making a bunch of stuff I don't to post yet so dipped into my favourite thing, aka redesigning "old" characters [like it as much as designing new ones].

7. Title: Kitty Kitty Cat. Just a little cat, shes actually a pretty old character of mine, just redesigned her recently. I really need to draw and post more often.... Sort of like how the shading came out by I'm still kinda shit at it Might draw some more cause I have alot of old animal characters to redesign.

8. Title: Old Gay Cat named Juliet. Another cat laby, this time Sarah's mom, Juliet! Shes also been redesigned but not as much as Sarah. Going to do Sarah's other mom next [which until recently didn't have a design at all but still working on it a bit] Really like how the pose of this came out [still iffy on the shading though..]

9. Title: 2022 Pride Icon. New Icon/Pride Icon [might use this after pride month and just swap out the bg, or might a new one later].  and yes I used a very similar pose to my last upload, I just liked how it looked so used it again. Happy Pride Everyone!

10. Title: Filters and Fingerguns. I have been trying to draw more stuff lately :], liking the stuff I have been making, especially like how the hair and eyes of this came out of this came out :3. The character here is Eve, Juliet's wife and Sarah's second mom.

11. Title: Smiles and Glitter. I know I should be drawing the characters I have already more hut I really like designing new characters..... k? and felt like  I needed another sparklecat....[I need more sparkle anything really] Also tried to emulate the look of those old blingee? gifs and it looks okay enough. Going to try to figure out how to do it better.

12. Title: Metamorphosis. Yeah another bright sparkly cat.....a character I have actually been thinking about designing for month's,  A trans flag coloured lynx with a lil golden bell that shines like a rainbow in the light. A mascot-y character that's meant to idk be anti-thesis to how big corps pretend to like us during pride months by just changing their logos to rainbow and selling overpriced pride merch, then just change their logos back and don't do anything more about it for the rest of the year, I guess? Like a mascot thats undeniably queer in colours and otherwise I guess. My brain feels a bit slow and foggy right now right now so I might not be articulating well.

13. Title:  Splat. Haven't posted here for a month and lost steam for artfight not long into it [will post attacks I did once month is over], but I did make my first game, a rpgmaker game that is about 10 to 15 minute rpgmaker game for a mini jam. Thought maybe I should post about here at least once, https://namelessmewmew.itch.io They technically can be named whatever by the player but I wanted to give me a 'true' name as well, so here is Splat./colour-less

14. Title: 'Fuck you! Catboys your Demon'. I can't just not put my sona/main character though multiple redesigns/design updates, I wouldn't be NamelessMewMew, if I didn't! Going the opposite route in terms of adding things to his design lol compared to my old sona [casanova, a cat like creature that I added demon features to, I need to redesign them again at some point.] I need to learn how to draw stubble properly... and also maybe change the eyes a bit, you looks kinda uh high rather than just tired.

15. Title: Aging. Just feels weird, so a little doodle thing.

16 - 17. Title:   Prancing in the night. Wanted to start another art practice dump to practice shading, decided to do my personal characters to motivate me more but then got really into it and added more  and more shading/lighting, then thought this would look very stupid without a bg, then added lighting to that bg and then wanted the stars to sparkle.... [which I hope loads as its not loading in the preview I'm seeing now] yeah I guess I can make this its own deviation. The bg is a bit mid quality but I'm glad I did because I don't do proper bgs much, but I do really love how the Plushie came out in this, especially the pose [and shading]. Though the gif site I use makes transparency kinda uh line-y? Basically the lighting and shading looks smoother than this originally, though I don't mind how it looks

Anime Girl Art Dump:

Title:  Art Practice: 1. Ramble-y stuff: Been in a hating my art phrase because there's lots of parts of art I'm not great with, shading, anatomy, perspective, backgrounds..... so forth But can't get myself practice without also posting it but also it has to be good enough to post [when I feel my art is bad then I feel like I can't waste the time spent on it by not posting it but I also feel like I'm somehow a bad person for being bad at art]..... so going try to do dumps like this where I try to focus on certain things. Hopefully I can improve at least a bit this year. About the art: This is mostly Hair Shading + Faces + Eyes Practice, but also tried to draw various different hairstyles. Want to do more experimenting with how I draw eyes and hair...

Hands and Eyes Art Dump:

Title:  Art Practice: 2. More art practice, this time hands [done mostly by memory and a bit by using my hands as ref] + eyes [more just the irises and pupils rather than eyes as a whole]. Like where I am getting with eyes but really need to work on hands alot more.... Can't think of anything else to say really cause tired... other than its 4 days till I'm 20 which is wild.

[lovelywingsart]

Plans for after 'Dear Mother' (kinda long plan update shite!)

So y'all have probably noticed that I'm going ham on 'Dear Mother' - Thats because I gave myself the goal of finishing it before years end. And, good news, its almost done!!! So really, im just here to say my plans afterwards since I really haven't been updating much at all;

> Immediately after Dear Mother is finished, I'll be going on a partial hiatus to finish Baldurs Gate 3 and give myself time to relax and just... give myself a fucking break. The only times I'll be on the computer are the 2 days a week my fiance uses the PS5 to play with friends, so those are the only time I'll be doing any kind of art, be it personal or commission work. So if you happen to get a commission, please do not expect it right away. The general TAT for small things is 2 weeks, and with this hiatus and minimal energy, it might be longer. But I'll be giving myself a very... VERY much needed break to finish BG3 and have more shenanigans afterwards.

> When hiatus is over, be it immediately after the game or giving some time to work on other things, I'll be starting a new comic, and will try to pace myself a little bit because its going to be... huge. There will also be one more Survival AU written story before it starts- because this comic will be the fight against Miranda, involving the Lords, Emelia and Ethan. It is going to be huge, and its going to be difficult. There will be no other primary written stories until after its done unless there's a drabble or something someone asks me to make. I'll be finishing up and perfecting a few stories for after that's done, though I will primarily be working on the Survival AU with art, as well.

> Now, when the Survival AU comic is done, I may take another break, because there's yet another comic I'm going to start, which will be Emelias arrival to the factory. The start of this comic will also kickstart primary work focusing on the first few years of Emelias arrival. I am going to say now that while yes, they may have their moments, there will be quite a bit of mildly uncomfortable subjects, as the first few years involved some heavy mutual abuse from both. You'll get to see how she got there and how they managed the first few years as well as quite a bit with her having... well, two eyes 😂 I'll give another warning when I get there but yknow. I've said before how genuinely dysfunctional they are with a few written examples, but I feel like it'll be a different story with proper visual...

And while I'm working on that fun little bit, I'll also be introducing a new written series that I've been secretly chipping away at- While I work on Emelias background and arrival, I'll also be working on Karls.

I will be working on/posting a small(?) mini(???) series of Karls own backstory. It will include his own 'arrival' to the village, interactions with Miranda and occasionally the Lords, and even smaller things such as the loss of his leg and how he got the scars across his nose and throat, all up until Emelia is dropped off. I don't plan on there being VERY many stories, though I will absolutely be more than open to writing for him if anyone has other ideas! 💙

And... thats it for now! Noting that the next two comics are going to take quite a while, ESPECIALLY the Survival AU one... I've no idea how long everything will take exactly, and all this is going off of if life decides to give me a fucking break. There's still alot going on, and I'm struggling alot... but I still have plans. Dear Mother will be finished before the new year (if not nearly exactly ON new years depending on our plans for the next two weeks and me not getting burnt out) and I'll have January to attempt to recuperate. Will I take the entire month? I'm not sure. But given shit doesn't go wrong like it did this year, we might be ok.

But... yeah! Thats about it. Right now I'm focusing on Dear Mother and trying my best. Comms ARE still open but will just take a lil bit more time than usual, so if you're fine waiting, hit me up 👍

[tekni-kali]

Day 225

09:57p, Saturday, June 09, 2023

Uhm....soooo 176 days since I typed out a post for the blog. Coooooolll.....I made my way back...eventually? Let us see how long I stick around this time. I would like to try my best to make something somewhat consistent.

We'll see...

I revived my iPod Mini today. I took a picture of my desk and thought it looked neat, so that's kind of what brought me back here...Here's the picture:

Things I see:

Apple iPod Mini

Left Nintendo Switch Joycon

Nintendo 3DS XL

Laptop

USB Extender adaptor thingie

Cup of Pens

Digital Pen for computer graphic drawing doodles

Christmas lights plug

My Cup!

4 stickers of my art

Hollow Knight stickers from amazon

The desk mat

the hdmi splitter button

Warm ikea lamp

Monitor stand!

Okay...thats enough of the things I see in the picture. I like the idea of using the iPod mini again. I wore it on the walk to 7/11 and it worked out really nicely clipped to my shirt and holding the bag in place....I didn't have to fiddle with it at all!! The one thing I may try to investigate to replace for improvement is the headphone/earbud situation. These hot pink jlab beauties were on clearance for eight fiddy at the local wal greens. The bass is distorted but the noise isolation is nice.

Now I am curious as to whether there is a bluetooth adaptor that I can connect my earbuds to then plug the 3.5mm into the ipod to play through it....

That's what I'll look up next. I'll come back in a bit maybe.

-10:05p

10:25p -

Well...that was fun. I didn't look that up yet but I did want to come back and write a bit about my day...so maybe I'll try to do that?

I washed the dishes. I did a driveby someones house to pick up free chairs from their front lawn. I panicked and drove away....then came home and re-arranged my music files and revived the iPod. I collected Behb from work we'd made plans to go to the state park again....by the time we left the house we would've gotten there at 4 and the park closes at 5:30.....traffic was very bad because of all the holiday events. They had every turn around closed so I essentially just spent 30ish minutes driving around what normally should be a 5 minute square. I was very annoyed.

When we got home I boiled two eggs, fucked up peeling one of them and just threw it away. Then Behb suggested an idea for an activity...popcorn and movie night! He didn't think we had popcorn, I told him there was some in the pantry....it was too expired to eat so we walked down to the gas station and bought a bag to pop deciding along the way that we'd watch Die Hard....cuz...christmas movie - holiday festivities and what not.

I strung up lights last night! First I stuck the command strips to the glass on the window and they didn't stay....then I stuck them to the wall and clipped one of the three wires in there and they haven't fallen down yet! I also strung some over the picture and hung up the two christmas arts his family gave us last year...those combined with the christmas tree wax warmer and we're officially festive!

But newai....

When we returned home, we learned that Die Hard isn't streaming on any of the streamy services we have, and we didn't want to pay $3.99 to rent it once.....so I started scrolling....and suggested: Scooby Doo Movie (2002ish) or Jumanji (1995 w/ Robin Williams).

Behb popped the corn, brought a beer, and picked Jumanji. Turns out....ITSA CHRISTMAS MOVIE TOO! At least...Christmas was in it....so...that counts. I honestly don't think I'd seen it before...but it was a good watch and I was entertained so I'm glad it worked out.

Tomorrow is Behbiversary! It will be 4 years since we swiped n started conversing. I am glad we are progressioning together. I'm going to look for strawberries and chocolates for us to make after he's off tomorrow. He got me roses ^_^. Okay...gonna go click around...I think I'll be back soon...I think I want to add some more...but a break now would be nice. So...ye...brb

-10:34p

10:35p-

You know...I just thought...I can probably use the 3.5mm aux cord to plug the Mini into the JBL Flip....then I get iPod muzik on loud speaker....that will be a tomorrow try...I do want to get up for my earbuds now though....IDK, it just seems silly using it in the apt.

10:45p-

I got my earbuds! and found sum muzik:

I think I'll get some screenshots off the switch to post up here. I think I decided I don't want to put pictures in this post...but I"ll work on organizing them to post separately like I did before....but...ye...this seems long enough...so...I'm gonna post it now.

Catch ya later!

-10:46p

[look-at-the-soul]

Hi! It's gossip girl❤️❤️ I missed our little messages too! Luckily school isn't too bad right now so I hoping to be able to keep up on here a bit better now! I hope you're doing well!! I got to read so of the stories you've done recently and they've all been brilliant! I especially liked the one you posted yesterday! Make your home in my heart! ❤️ it was so cute! I love how soft Tommy was with her and how he took time to care for her! ❤️❤️ and I also liked the Runway! I haven't seen Anna but I heard it's good! And I loved how you made the story begin!

I've been doing alright! My break was nice and exams went pretty well! My classes this semester are a bit harder though so that's a bit of a challenge though 😂🥲😂

And I think my anxiety is doing a bit better now! I think I may actually try to post something within. Like two weeks maybe! 

I know I mentioned I had writers block but you know what😂 I got to go home for this weekend and had to fly. So I was like determined to try and finish at least one of my stories. And not only did I finish both but I've got 20k+ words broken up over about 6 different stories done now😂 One I still need to finish though! I kinda surprised myself too because I was typing stuff on the plane and usually I'm nervous annoy people seeing that stuff. But I lucked out both times and no one was in the seat next to me, which I think helped! 😂And I actually have more ideas I wanna get done by next week too😂 It was actually your little idea about Drabble that helped me get out of it too! So thank you for that! ❤️ Once I remembered that I didn't have to write a super long story it was a bit easier for me to cut down in what wasn't important! I have some bullet point ideas or mini Drabble that I've also almost got done too! There is one idea that I may send an other ask about though! It's something I be been wanting to write because I think I have a really good idea for a line prompt. But there's I'm a little stuck because of some of the TW's that would be included in the story and I'm not sure how'd people react? Idk if that makes sense but I can explain more in the other ask if that's ok! 

And yes! Alfie is absolutely a rich character! He's one of my favorites😂 I'm so glad he made it though the series😂 

Morpheus is pretty good! It's based of a comic by Neil Gaiman about the the Lord of Dreams (Morpheus)! And it starts off after he's been imprisoned for like 100 years and finally gets free and has to build up his kingdom again! I know it's not the busy summary but it's definitely worth the watch! And the actor who plays Morpheus (Tom Sturrige? I think it's spelled) is also very nice to look at so😂😂 but it's a pretty good show!

And I've heard of Both those movies with Cillian but haven't seen them. I've especially heard people like Breakfast on Pluto! I haven't heard of Virgin River though! What's it about? 

And I will say that we have interacted before but again I've kinda been hiding around for the last little bit 😂 And I honestly started the same way as you to, only on anon then I decided to share on thing and people seems to like it so I tried sharing more😂 Then I went into hiding again but you know, I think I might come out of my cave soon😅 And thank you for all your encouragement too! You really have helped me be less nervous about it all!❤️ 

And I haven't actually seen Sex and the City, but I've heard of that one too! But I get what you mean by being apprehensive to second parts! Sometimes the producers should have just stuck to one😂 but I do know that gossip girl is on HBO if you couldn't find it! 

Ohhh and local cafe's are fun! I wish there were some more near me I could go to😂 My college is great but it's not really in a big city where there's lots of cafes😂 We do have a few boba shops that could probably work pretty well though! Does coffee flavored boba count? 😂 And ohh I did see that you were writing for them! I still haven't seen a Quiet Place two yet, but I've seen part of Anna (didn't get to finish it) and I do really enjoy the Nolan Batman's (Cillian is very good at playing the characters who are a little psycho😂) But I can't think of anything specific to see with this right now! If I think of something I'll definitely let you know though!! ❤️

Aside from all the fics I've been trying to catch up on, I have a few mystery novels I want to finish! Most of what I've read though this year had been my textbooks though 😂

And I hope your days have been going alright and will only get better from her on!🥰🥰You're amazing!! Thank you for all your advice! And I'll be sure to send that ask about you opinion on an idea I had after this! ❤️❤️❤️ 

XoXo Gossip Girl!

Hello gossip girl!!!

How have you been?

I’m glad to hear school is doing alright:) thank you so much! I’ve been writing more and faster (I think hehe) aww thank you! It makes me so happy to know you liked that story! I’m a firmly believer that Tommy would be a sweet man, he just couldn’t leave her there in the pouring rain at night… and she managed to win his heart too. (I might have a second part planned for later) but first I need to finish the ancient request I got a while ago, I think there are 2 more stories in my drafts (gotta hurry up). I’m writing the second part to The Runway!!! And I’m so excited about it 🥰 looove Lenny!

Congratulations on the good grades! Keep the hard work going ☺️ oh but I’m sure you will do it just fine! Trust yourself (best of luck with your classes!)

Remember to take deep breaths, try to think of the things that gives you peace usually (and of course post the stories you’ve been working!), it will be just fine 😉

Oh I think airports are a great source of inspiration, wow! That’s an impressive work, you have been writing a lot! It makes me so happy to hear that! Yeah I don’t like neighbors looking at what you’re doing haha I get so nervous, but you were neighbor’s free so it must’ve helped a lot. Did you keep writing? *eyes*… oh that post helped me too! Like a lot! Sometimes I pressure myself to write something long, over X words but when I read that I was like… wait a minute, some stories can work great as short, a Drabble… 🥰💕 aww you’re welcome! It makes my entire world to know you’ve found some inspiration in my silly posts… my job is done here. We don’t even realize the pressure we put on ourselves sometimes right? Some stories are mean to be short, a mini series, a long series or a one shot, and it’s perfectly fine, what really matters is that we write what we want and enjoy it.

In your other post you mention SA, but I don’t know what it means? And also TW’s? 🙈 also do you want me to post the other message with the ideas for your story? Let me know!… okay the general idea sounds great to me! I just have a few questions to fully understand the plot, which I will share on your next message if you tell me you are okay with me posting it. But to answer your dilemma, I’d say go for it because internally you’ve been thinking about it since the beginning! Don’t doubt yourself on it, whatever path you choose is going to be the right one because it’s part of your original idea 😉😊

Alfie was a great addition to the show! He is so interesting and unique, he has a lot of things to bring to the table…

Oh wow Morpheus sounds interesting 🤔 I will try to see if it’s around the platform I have subscription from, or at least a small video to get an idea of the show, although to tell you the truth? I find it hard to get hooked with another series than peaky, what have they done to me? I want/need 10 more series ahaha (said the frustrated one) 😂 but it would be good to have something else to look at.

Breakfast on Pluto was amazing, I loved his character there (I think they did it way too early tho, he could’ve won an Oscar for it years later, but we know he’s not after that… Virgin River is a small (and perfect) little town full of mountains and rivers and nice people, so Mel is a practitioner nurse,widow and she arrives to start her job at the small clinic, she meets Jack a former soldier and they fall in love, but things aren’t easy so there are a million ups and downs, a pregnant ex, the noisy neighbors, flashbacks from the war… it’s so good!

Wow don’t hide! I love interacting with you on anon messages so I guess it’s the same with your own blog 😉 but whatever makes you feel comfortable! I hope you decide to share more and more,the first one is the hardest, so… we’ll be waiting with open arms when you decide to leave the cave 💖 ah anytime sweetheart! Happy to help :)

Yeah I didn’t watch it either but a friend told me what happened and I was like O.o nope I’m not watching that hehe I mean, they left Samantha out *horror face* they had the audacity *gasp* hahah yeahI think whatever you fancy to drink works ;) what does flavored boba tastes? Ahh you *need* to watch AQP2, I was reluctant at first, but Emmett won my heart over… Anna meh, the general idea was amazing, but I think the movie had something missing? Is it just me? I mean why would they make Anna have a girlfriend and be with Lenny and the other agent…? What’s the point? Yeah living la vida loca, I get it, but (?) did he took her to Hawaii? Did the gf found out Anna cheated? I have a lot of questions haha that’s why I write for him lol and I love the psycho characters too! *high five* Jonathan Crane was great, but one of the best roles for me will always be Anthropoid and the edge of love, (love the war theme).

Oh please share the reading list! I love finding new pieces to read, I have a John Banville novel I bought back in November and I haven’t read it yet… I am too behind some stories (I need to catch up on reading asap..), but it will be around so I try to not pressure myself a lot, sometimes it’s just hard to keep up with everything. Ahah I bet you have! Luckily you will find some time to read novels and fiction during your free time ☺️

Days have been alright thanks, I’m doing my nails old way (Idont want to do gel anymore there are loads of videos saying how much damage it can make on the skin and although I really didn’t use the UV lamp like once a week, I want to protect my skin as much as I can…I’ve been writing a lot, more than usual so I’m trying to maximize the inspiration spree, days have been warmer and I want to see if I can find a friend to go to a concert in June, so wish me luck!

Thank you for your beautiful words 🥺 I am here to chat whenever you need, and to me you’re amazing as well! So brave and I wish you nothing but the best in every aspect of your life, see you around xx

[capriciouscaprine]

this part is even longer:

basically, this has gone and goes on for another roughly five years, so here we are, almost 10 years out of university, and they're crashing at their new job yet again; kudos to them, they made it more than a year there for the first time, but every time they bring up a work issue that stems from something they did (overshared/took something personally/put in extra work that went unappreciated/etc) and get the advice to change their behavior to avoid those situations, they state, out loud, 'well, that's just who I am as a person!' even though they HATE when other people use that as an excuse

however, they've also neglected their art business again; suggestions on setting up a social media network to more easily handle cross-platform promotion were met with complaints of 'it's too complicated!', and tons of money has gone into different machines for different types of work that are ultimately sitting around unused (which, they later said, 'I wish people wouldn't 'enable' me!' bc us as friends had said, 'that sounds cool!' when they had originally talked up what business opportunities different things would give them, and also we were all over 25 and so assumed we each could make our own financial decisions)

they quit the 'new' job, giving up the highest wage they've ever earned, only for the art business to fail to pick back up bc post-pandemy inflation has hit and nobody can afford anything

at this point, I'm facing the final year of my degree after a TON of setbacks, working, going to school, and also entering an internship that will essentially take away my weekends, and I'm not a person with a lot of energy to go around; I realize that as expensive as microwave meals are compared to cooking from scratch, I have got to find time somewhere, so I cut out the hour or so I used to spend cooking and washing dishes afterwards and instead exclusively employ Chef Mike and keep the mug, plate, and fork I do use in my room on a shelf and wash them whenever I remember (gross, yes, but less gross than leaving them to rot in the kitchen sink)

I'm already out of the house, working on classwork, or asleep for basically the entire day, and now I'm only in the kitchen for 3-5 minutes at a time when I do go in there (storing sealed snacks and baby food pouches in my room to grab while working), and my roommate sees me even less bc they're going out with their new partner and don't wake up until after noon most days

one day, early in the semester, I happen to go in the kitchen and my roommate is awake! we chat about nothing much, me mentioning something from school only for them to cut me off if I'm not actively in the middle of a word (typical) and talk about themself again, etc, only for, as I'm heading back to my room, them to say, 'hey, the sink is getting a little funky, we should really sit down and come up with a chore chart for in here'

WE?!?! who is WE?!?!?!?!?! I haven't touched a counter top in DAYS, let alone built up the crust on the stove or put dishes in the sink (or PUT FOOD ON THE FLOOR 'FOR THE CATS' AND LEFT IT THERE), have you just not noticed those are YOUR dishes you keep having to hand wash (we had/I have a countertop dishwasher) to cook your multi-dish meals???

I snapped, and by 'snapped' I mean I gave a vague potential-affirmation, went back to my room, and the next day I scrubbed out a mini fridge another roommate had left and bought a new microwave, both of which got set up in my room along with most of the things I had left food-wise in the fridge and cabinets

I did not re-enter my own kitchen, in the house I OWN, for the rest of the year aka multiple months

finally, my roommate announced they were moving out (they wanted to make a big deal about it and have a whole household meeting??? and eventually just told me via text)

the lead up to the big move featured them and their partner buying TONS of stuff for the new apartment and absolutely packing my living room with it all (something they had made fun of another roommate for doing when they were in the middle of moving out)

when they did move out, they not only left the sink packed full of dirty dishes and didn't clean an inch of it, but they took the time to hide cat grossness around the house in places that were clean before and that mess could not have ended up in without human intervention (this is something they told me they had done to a former roommate who was 'mean to them', back when we first started hanging out, so I knew to look out for it now that I was the 'bad' roommate); they cleaned other places, so they could brag to the friends that were helping them move about how much work they were putting in and how nice they were leaving the place (I got to hear them tell a mutual friend that they were coming back to clean the kitchen the next day, except they only came back to pick up the last of their stuff and then left immediately)

if you're thinking, 'damn, all these paragraphs dedicated to just some roommate, have you only had the one or something? y'all barely talked!', that's bc I've cut out so much to make it less likely this gets recognized by a mutual friend in the wild; I put a TON of time, effort, and even money into helping this person improve their life, things that siblings or partners would do for each other, and when things were good we spent entire days together, even going on vacation together and inviting each other to our family events; we were super close, except for the part where I started to notice we never talked about me, just them

so, they've moved out, they're posting all these positive things about how great the new place is, how clean it is, how they're really enjoying the kitchen specifically, and on from there, feeling just a bit more targeted against me as I read through these posts; but! as far as I know, they've never publicly said anything about me specifically, so that's good, at least

but whoops! the art business still isn't thriving, and it turns out all that nice stuff was put onto their credit card, and just as I'm finishing the full-time part of my internship that has stressed me financially, they post about owing

the

SAME

amount

that I do

AND THEN

they post about, gee, maybe they should start paying attention to recommended portion sizes, bc their food isn't lasting very long and they don't have a gym they can get to anymore (lost their car a while back, oops), and on top of that they keep wanting to have regular friend hangouts but all their friends are busy :/ (bc they HAVE JOBS)

ohhhh, it's too good, it's too delicious, too perfect: we're in the same boat: $X,000 in debt, working on our meal planning and weight, and my friends are trying to reach out to me bc I've been in my pit since last summer; how could I not pick them as my focus for my 'glow up'?

which, to be clear, I'm not going to interact with them in any way, and I'm not going to be sabotaging their reputation or anything; what I'm doing is so much better, bc it involves me living well and no one turning on me for doing something untoward bc I won't be doing anything untoward

here's the plan:

step 1: become tiny, at least far smaller than I ever was when they knew me (achieved, even as I'm working towards more specific goals), bc they regularly commented on how tiny people always get what they want and while being super obvious they were jealous of smaller people and judgemental of larger people

step 2: pay off this debt (genuinely in progress, I'm back to my usual hours at work and chipping away at it)

step 3: finish my degree (kinda just a step that has to happen, not about them at all)

step 4: start making plans with friends; pick a regular hang out spot, announce I'll be there in advance, and post photos afterwards of what a great time we had

step 5: start wearing all the cute clothes they were into and wore but always complained that people never appreciated; well, yeah, you're into some niche fashions and are judging the general public's reaction; this is two fold bc they stopped dressing up bc they didn't get compliments AND they loved to complain about people 'copying' their style when 'their' style just happened to be popular amongst their friends, aka the sort of people to like the same things they like

step 6: get a good job that I post excitedly about; isn't it great how dragging myself through additional training has gotten me further in the career I love??

step 7: aesthetic meals in my CLEAN kitchen, with hints dropped about how I loved living with friends, but it is pretty sweet to only have my own dishes in the sink

step 8: genuinely glow up aesthetically: hair, nails, skin, and makeup; they've always had me beat there, so time to show off the benefits of not quitting your job just bc your coworkers aren't your friends

step 9: (actual crazy person tiem) stalk their fb and post when they post about the same stuff, only mine is somehow better; they went on a hike? oh, I did, too, but I had a cute picnic to take with me and by the way I looked good doing it; went to a concert? oh, I forgot to post these concert photos from when I went to a show, and I had the perfect time while there; restaurant? I've already been to several, just scroll back through my timeline!

there's no end goal here; I don't even want them to stop having fun in their life, just feel a bit paranoid that they're being copied but not being able to explain it without seeming like they're jumping at shadows; I'd even be proud if they started leveling up in response and their life genuinely improved long term; I don't even think I'm going to follow through on step 9

really, like I said at the beginning of the first post, I'm just getting this out of my system so I can quit thinking about them so much and move on, and maybe now I finally will

okay, ex roommate post tiem to get it out of my system

(feel free to be nosey that's why I'm posting about it on tumblr)

first of all, why not just TALK to someone about this? bc I don't like social interaction and I'm too busy to see anyone, but also bc my ex roommate is a self-employed traditional artist, so if social opinion about them tanks, that could genuinely jeopardize their income, and they didn't actually do anything worse than be a kinda crappy friend on the whole and a shitty roommate in their last few months of living with me

me obsessing over them and using them as my secret competition is bc I'm mentally ill, not bc they 'deserve it' or 'need to be taken down a notch' or should be 'cancelled' or anything

so, my ex roommate had a shit life growing up, right up there with being any given social worker's average case of a low income child who's dealt with physical abuse, neglect, and bouts of homelessness; then, they graduated high school and used student loans to go to university to get a degree in fine art, and finally experiencing reliable housing while they had that student loan money; they pick up food service jobs while in college, start building their social media presence, and take home every classroom art supply that isn't nailed down, just like any professional artist does at the start of their career

fast forward approximately five years after graduation

they're still only just building up their online presence and they've never held down a job for more than about 10 months at a time; all of their previous living situations have imploded and they're living with a family member who doesn't help them do anything and expects them to magically get a good job and move out any day now, even though they don't have a car and they live in the suburbs

enter me, the person who owns a crappy little house that (eventually) has a bedroom open up so they can move in and a job to recommend them to

(I'm cutting out a bit here to maintain plausible anonymity)

they start out strong, decorating the room, cooking and sharing meals (not a routine in our house, just something nice they do), and building up their art income while they make money from the job I helped them get; they even manage to get a car!

but then, as a year at the job approaches, they have a harder and harder time getting along with their boss, and it's unclear if the job really sucks that bad or if my roommate isn't communicating well; they also seem to be failing to balance art, their other job, and general life, doing things like going on art binges only to crash and get an hour of sleep and be late to work the next day; eventually, they experience a significant health event, and they get fired for being absent from their job for a month

they focus on their art business, talking about how they're gonna explore more types of social media promotion and showing off how much their income has grown since they were at their relative's house; I've started my masters degree at this point, and then the pandemy hits, so we spend more time hanging out, especially since my other roommate had moved out by this point so it was just the two of us in the house

over time, the cracks start to show; they're so positive and cute and bubbly when they have the energy, and they talk a bunch about effective communication and boundaries and all that, but when they talk about their other friends, it's like a constant stream of criticism about their life choices

oh, one friend has openly wept about being fat and not fitting into the cute clothes they both want to wear? well, sure, body positivity and all that, but then my roommate gets annoyed that their friend is annoyed by the regular attempts to invite them out for hikes or to a gym my roommate goes to, and is further annoyed when this friend won't 'just' tell them they don't want to go and that the friend simultaneously still talks about her dissatisfaction with her body; my roommate is flat out making 'pick a struggle!'-type comments about this 'friend'

another friend struggles with money; they were low-income, and now they make relatively decent money, and my roommate is FULL of judgement about how they spend their money and how they socialize at work and try to turn all their coworkers into their friends even tho that just isn't appropriate

any time they go to someone's house that is messy, there are several comments made about why they don't 'just' clean up as they cook or do stuff around the house, and if they see a roach that person is absolutely getting judged hard core bc my roommate 'has ptsd (jokingly)' about all the trashy places they've lived (we live in the southern US, btw, we have lots of thriving insects and small mammals all over the place)

they complain about how someone keeps talking about wanting a better, higher-paying job, but won't put in the time to get required certifications to get that better job

they constantly talk about the importance of 'open' conversation, harping on how they're happy to have a frank conversation about anything without blowing up over it

and yet

they do

ALL OF THESE SAME THINGS

they talk about wanting to lose w while binging on snacks with friends and eventually a new partner, complaining about wanting to go to the gym but also how sad they are no one will go with them and that's why they go less; their savings starts running out at the pandemy impacts their art sales so they go get a job after talking about it endlessly (another complaint about a different 'friend') and tries to make friends with all their coworkers and starts a room overhaul even though they admit they have no budget for it; they don't wash up after using a TON of bowls and pans to cook a single meal and even leave out tidbits 'for the cats' on the FLOOR that they never go back and pick up; they don't actually do any training on their own time to get promoted or improve their art business; and trying to give them advice and feedback or talk about something that makes you uncomfortable with them results in a near-immediate grumpy cold shoulder, let alone that they dominate nearly every conversation with their own personal interests and check their phone when you talk about yours

(I have to go to work rippp I don't want tumblr to delete this in drafts so I'm posting it now and will continue later)

[findafight]

WAIT OKAY I just read your supernatural st au and AHHHHH now I need that one too holy shit token human Steve!! Token human Steve!!!

Even here everyone’s just like I love him he’s a neat little guy he’s literally thrown himself around and been mortally wounded for the party when he’s literally the only human and everyone’s just like - him!!!! Selkie Robin and how they find out they’re soulmates!! Aaahh!!!! And that final line…… I am obsessed putting in my little request for a full fic when you can, pretty please!!!

Anon you're spoiling meeeee I love you I love hearing from people who like my writing/ideas!! Original post

This one is definitely something that has high potential of me actually writing too. Because like, yeah. The Party is Marge Simpson "I just think they're neat" potato meme about Steve. He's so shaped.

This has a readmore because it's actually got two different mini scenes in it. Enjoy~~~ (also note I included a bit of another non kinky kinkmeme prompt about supernatural baby sitter Steve in this!)

I imagine a scene where Dustin, early fall of '85, is complaining to Lucas and Mike about another failed attempt to get Steve Officially (as he can't actually be Pack unless he KNOWS he's pack, ya feel? Like he IS their pack but also he doesn't know so not really but yes but no...) In their pack at lunch, and Eddie, who as mentioned is a vampire that feeds off energy and is therefore The Most Dramatic Bitch Ever, overhears and is like

"Steve? Steve Harrington is part of your Pack??"

And Dustin goes "well he would if he stopped being DENSE about it!!! We've been trying to tell him-"

"you've been trying to tell him" says Mike.

"-since before Christmas last year! But he keeps thinking we're-"

"you're-"

"-talking about DnD!!"

Eddie is just a little shocked his newest sheepies have been trying for nine months to tell Steve, King Steve, of all people, that his preppy human ass is such a firm part of their Pack that they haven't given up on telling him.

Lucas pipes up. "To be fair to Steve, he was concussed before Christmas last year, and then again this summer."

Dustin shakes his head. "Need to get the guy a helmet. Protect the braincells he has left."

"did he have any to begin with?"

"oh, can it, Mike." Lucas says. "At least he knows about Robin, now. So maybe you should ask her for help. He believed her!"

Ohhh? Eddie was curious, because he had heard certain...rumours, about a Robin and her possible tie to Steve Harrington.

Dustin scoffs. "Okay, yeah, but she's his literal actual soulmate who he still refuses to date, and she transformed in front of him. But I don't want to freak him out. A seal is one thing, a wolf is another!"

"Dustin, you're basically a dachshund."

"fuck right off"

Eddie waves his hands in front of them. "Wait wait wait. Are you talking about Robin Buckley? The selkie in the marching band with Gareth?" The sheepies nod. "You're saying Steve Harrington, former captain of laundry basket sport-"

"actually pretty sure he wasn't ever basketball captain, just swim team-"

"-former Head Jock, is dorky little Robin Buckley's soulmate? Like full on, Selkie coat magic woo woo, Soulmate?"

They all nod, but it's Lucas who speaks. "Yeah. They worked together over the summer. Became, like, inseparable. She told him in August sometime I think."

Eddie does not know how to process that.

-----

ALSO!!!

I imagine Steves parents sitting him down, after his nineteenth birthday (which I headcanon as April first) and very carefully explaining to him that Monsters Are Real.

And Steve sitting there, nearly eight months into knowing that, trying to pretend he doesn't. Pretending that since Robin told him she was a Selkie and the Party told him about being werewolves, he'd sort of, kind of, become any supernatural beings' go to babysitter. Sort of.

It started with a litter of pups he stumbled across in the woods who seemed really friendly for being abandoned in the woods and welcomed the water he brought them and the ear scritches he gave, that he didn't even realize were werewolf children until a couple came crashing through the trees frantically and stopped to watch as he helped a puppy get a leaf off its paw. And the pups are waggled over to the woman and the man looked at Steve with a twitchy nose and then Steve realized they were scenting him because ohhhh. Werewolves.

And Steve went "uh. I think they forgot how to change back? Good luck?" And left. Because what else was he going to do?

So it became a thing. Little magical creatures were told that if all else fails, Steve Harrington will make sure you're safe and looked after until your parents could get to them. He amassed a Rolodex of the contact info near-human folk of Hawkins, and a reputation for being a damn good babysitter. And also somehow having a gaggle of kids around him whenever he went to the park.

So his parents go on and on about things Steve already knows about and he's wondering why they're telling him all of it and also how they know and then they mention how these things are dangerous. How they must be removed. Destroyed. Killed.

Because that's what Harringtons do, they hunt monsters in the night and keep the good, normal, human folks of america safe.

And Steve, who knows that there are supernatural creatures in Hawkins; who knows what actual monsters in Hawkins look like and has hit them with a spiked bat and an axe; who can't go three blocks before some pup or fae or gnome or whatever decides to follow him like a duckling; who little lost kids of all shapes and sizes flock to in order to get back home; sits there and listens as his parents tell him how to kill them. How to salt and burn the remains.

He grips the edge of the table with white knuckles and purposefully evens his breath. He will not betray The Party, or Robin, or any of the families who have found a safe haven in Hawkins to live their lives peacefully. And isn't it ironic, that the place the Harringtons supposedly live, the place they are barely in because of legitimate business and the family business takes them across the country, is a hotbed for supernatural activity. It happened right under their noses, and their only son and heir was at the centre of it. The Human in a Pack of werewolves, platonic soulmate to a Selkie, potential.... something to a vampire, babysitter of all the little creatures of the county.

So Steve tries to make a plan. He can't let his parents know that Hawkins is anything but a quiet human town, but he can't let them keep hurting innocents either. It's either a long con of taking up his family mantle and changing things from inside, manipulating the system like he did in highschool to his whims, or dismantling it loudly and more dramatically which could back fire.

Either way, as soon as his parents leave again (for human related business), he takes the family Grimoire, his birthright, and calls an All Party Meeting.

He slams the tome onto the table and says, simply,

"we've got a problem"