#i haven’t posted an edit since july. that’s nuts actually

[raiiny-bay]

once again posting to say… hi…

[purplesurveys]

996

This is originally an ask game that’s making the rounds here on Tumblr, but in this blog of course I answer everything. Quarantine Ask Game; questions by ghostly-nblm What’s your go-to snack? I haven’t really have one throughout this lockdown. I just snack on whatever’s available in our pantry - usually we have potato chips, salted egg chips, nuts, etc. And then sometimes my dad will whip up something for us himself, like wicked Oreos, churros, corndogs, and chocolate chip cookies. What’s a movie you could watch over and over? I could probably watch The Proposal everyday for the rest of my life and I doubt you’ll hear a complaint out of me. It’s just so funny, so lighthearted, and the entire cast meshes very well together. Favorite show to binge? Again when it comes to comfort shows/movies, I pick the lighthearted ones because they get me to relax and laugh a lot. That said, my favorite show to binge would be Friends. I recently started binge-watching it again and it feels good to come back to it after several months of not seeing an episode. 5 songs that make you want to dance? Shut Up And Dance - Walk the Moon Cinnamon - Hayley Williams Don’t Start Now - Dua Lipa Caught in the Middle - Paramore 7/11 - Beyoncé So, basically, Top 40 shit because it’s that genre that produces the most dance-y songs anyway. Pls don’t judge lmaaaaaao I like other artists I swear

5 songs that make you feel less lonely? I don’t know if I’ve ever turned to music to feel less lonely...I never really seek out that particular feeling. If anything, I listen to certain songs because I feel alone and I would want it to stay that way for the meantime.

Favorite meal to cook yourself? I always blank out at these cooking questions because I don’t know how to make anything, soz. When I start earning my own money I swear I’ll start experimenting with ingredients in the kitchen. You heard it here first. Seriously guys, when I finally get a stable income and you notice me spending it on unnecessary shit, feel free to nag me and tell me to start cooking!!! How do you “treat yourself”? With food. Food has always been my reward to myself after a long week, a hard exam, a bloody presentation, and basically after getting through something I had been dreading for a long time.   Favorite thing to do when doing self care? Surveys. Who have you been talking to the most? My family, I guess. “The most” is really pushing it though; I don’t talk a lot these days and it’s been difficult for me to sustain a conversation and not drain my battery in the middle of it. One thing you really miss right now? The past. I normally don’t think about it, but if there’s something from the past that I do miss, I end up pining hard for it. If you could be self-isolated with anyone who would it be? Angela. We haven’t seen one another in seven months so we could definitely do with spending seven months together lmao. We miss the shit out of each other. Do you have any pets? Yes :) Small update on my dogs: so for the last four months Kimi has hated having Cooper around and snarls every time he senses he’s nearby. But, and we have no clue what changed, now he has started humping Cooper and wants to be near him all the time...ugh. Favorite video games? At the early early phase of the lockdown I played Mario Kart 8 on the Switch all day long. Then for some reason I stopped and I haven’t played since like April. I haven’t played other video games. Favorite podcasts? Ear Biscuits. Andi has also started their own podcast and it debuted like a week ago; it looks extremely promising, but I’m super behind since I’ve deleted all my socials. I’ll catch up once I’m in the right state of mind and am feeling better enough to come back on my accounts. Favorite YouTubers? The main channels I watch are Good Mythical Morning and The Try Guys. But throughout the quarantine sooooooo many local celebrities have started their own vlog channels and majority of them are super fun to watch. My faves would be Andi Manzano’s, Manny Pacquiao’s daughter Mary’s, and Bea Alonzo’s. Wake up time? These days I try to be out of bed by 8:30 so I can sufficiently prepare and clean up for work, but early on in the lockdown I liked staying up all night and then waking up at like 9 or 10 AM. Sleep time? Anywhere from 10 PM to 1 AM. If you could go anywhere right now where would it be? I’d be in Sagada, vacationing by myself and doing some hiking, spelunking, reflecting, and soul-searching. I wish I can go back there someday; I just reallllly need to be out of the house and out of the city for a while.

What’s a change you want to keep when self isolation is over? There is nothing I wish to keep from this quarantine. It turned my entire life around and I wish I had all the things I had before it instead. Have you learned something? Yeah. Some of them the hard way. Any new skills? I took up a course on marketing last month so that was a lot of fun. Hobby-wise, I’ve been thinking of getting into cross-stitching so I can’t wait to buy my own kit and start with that. I’m also learning a lot of new and super helpful skills at work, like coming up with PR tactics/executions, knowing what will work for a client and what wouldn’t, photo editing, etc. It’s been the best internship experience ever. What’s a hobby you’d like to start learning? ^ The latter. I’d also love to learn how to bake, and maybe? start a vlog because it’d be nice to have an outlet where I can express myself and do new things while sharing my experiences with other people. What’s something you’d like to get better at? I constantly want to improve at my job because perfectionism. What food do you wish you had right now? Coffee shop pastries. :( God I haven’t had one of those in a while; I miss them loads. Your go to quarantine outfit? I don’t have one but man, when I do go out I tend to overdress because I rarely get an opportunity or have a reason to drive out these days, so I allow myself to look cute and all dressed up even if I’m just meant to pick up food at my grandma’s or something. What have you done today? I’ve been taking this survey, taken a shower, cried for a half hour, played with Cooper, cradled Kimi like a baby, checked my emails, and taken a few sips of coffee. Any plans for tomorrow? Work work work. What’s on your “to watch” list? The second volume of Unsolved Mysteries is finally out on Netflix so I’m hoping I get around to watching a few episodes soon. Any musicians/bands you’ve discovered? Most recent one was Chase Atlantic but I discovered them like back in July. Since I’m not listening to a lot of music these days, I’m not expecting to find new bands or singers to get into any time soon. Post a selfie right now!! Eh. Post pictures of your pets! I don’t feel like raking through my photos this morning. Maybe some other time. When was the last time you drank water? Last night at dinner. When was the last time you ate? Last night. When was the last time you got up and stretched? I can’t remember when I last did that. I usually stretch in bed, though.

Favorite song right now? This has been asked on every damn survey recently. I’m sure you’ll find my answer within the first page of my blog. Favorite social media to scroll through? It used to be Twitter until the lockdown hit and everyone stopped going out and having interesting updates. Before I deactivated everything, I loved spending time on Facebook. What’s the last thing you ate? A slice of pizza. What’s the weather like where you are? It’s a little cloudy and cold. I’m expecting it to rain today. Have you been playing animal crossing? No, but I know so many people who have been. How are you feeling? 50% meh, 50% just going through the motions. Who’s the last person you texted? Ate Alyanna. We’re both going through rough patches at the moment so we were cheering one another up. I needed that positivity a lot this morning and I’m glad we had that interaction. What does your last text message say with no context? ”Waaaaaaaa cute” Post a meme that made you laugh recently:

Outdoor activity you’d like to do right now? Hiking, mountain climbing, camping. Anything that’ll help me get disconnected from the world for a few days, really. Something you’re looking forward to when quarantine is over? Doing all those ^, traveling, being able to actually go to a workplace (once I have one), seeing my friends, going to bars again. Someone you’d like to see when quarantine is over? Everybody, man. I don’t give a shit as to who it is. Any new games coming out you want to play? Not really. I’m just waiting on GTA 6 even though there’s been like 0 updates on that front. New shows you’ve discovered? I revisited The Crown, but that’s it. I haven’t discovered anything new. Most comfortable piece of clothing you have? I find all of them comfortable; that’s why I wear them at home haha.

[dramallamadingdang]

Question Meme: The Run-on Sentence Edition

Hi! I hurt myself again yesterday. No, not in an "self-harm" kind of way but more in the usual (for me) "mountain-climbing incident" sort of way (I hate scree; I was so close to that summit) and got lots of deep bruises and lacerations for my troubles and was in a world of hurt by the time I saw a doctor, and I cracked something that isn't supposed to be cracked and it all hurts enough that I got prescribed narcotics again for a week and I really, really hate narcotics but I really, really like to be able to breathe without feeling like my lungs are being ripped to shreds, so...narcotics it is. 

It might make the answers to this latest iteration of Ye Olde Question Meme rather entertaining, though. Maybe. Maybe just incoherent. Well, whatever, @nekosayuri tagged me, so it's her fault, and I'm bored and my sleep schedule's all outta whack and I haven't even turned on my Simming computer in like three days and am posting this from a non-Simming laptop, so I have nothing else to post and....yeah. So, I'm like high as a kite right now. I mean, it's not totally unusual because I live in Colorado and weed's legal here, but narcotics is a totally different and much less coherent high for me. So, like, fair warning.

I'm not tagging anyone, though. I've no idea who's done this lately...

Name: Katrina

Zodiac Sign: I don't know why I answer this because astrology is a huge crock of BS, but everyone always wants to know so...Taurus. Barely. (Birthday is April 23.)

Height: Still ~6'0"/~182cm. Yay, not shrinking yet!

Languages Spoken: Fluently? At this point, only English. I used to be pretty fluent in Italian and German, but, you know, the saying "use it or lose it" applies, and since I've not had occasion to use those languages much....Well, there we are. I could speak quite a bit of Russian at one time because I spent a chunk of years there, in the late 80s when it was the Soviet Union and shortly thereafter when things were sorta nuts there. But, again, I have lost much of what I once knew. And there are smatterings of other languages that I can speak mostly-useless bits of. I can ask where the restroom is in many languages because I've traveled a lot. :) I do speak fluent bullshit, though...

Nationality: 'Murican. And since 'Muricans are really, really into their "ancestry" for some bizarre-o reason because ‘Murican apparently isn’t good enough...Like, 95% dirty Welsh peasantry (plus some Irish and Scottish thrown in for flavor) on the paternal side and on the maternal side....Well, one of my great-grandfathers was a first cousin of the English Queen Victoria. So basically, my maternal ancestry is the very confused inbred multinational mutt that is European Aristocracy. God only knows what’s in their genes, though my particular bit of it has lots o’ German. 

Favorite Fruit: Okra. It is a fruit. Look it up. Then again, much of what people call "vegetables" is, in fact, fruits, so there's that.

Favorite Scent: I've never really thought about this except when this was a question on a previous iteration of this meme that I did, and I don't remember what answer I came up with then. So I'm just gonna say...Vanilla-scented candles. Not cheap ones that just smell sickly-sweet sort-of-vanilla-y, but these ones that I buy online that smell...well...NOT sickly-sweet and like how vanilla really smells. Alternatively...snickerdoodles when they're baking. Hubby is baking me some snickerdoodles as I speak. Type. Whatever. The house smells really good. Baking bread is good, too. Before the snickerdoodles, hubby was baking the twice-weekly loaf of sourdough.

Favorite Color: Green. And/or orange. I go back and forth about which is really my favorite.

Favorite Animal: Elephants. Or hyenas. Or cats of all shapes/sizes. Or alpacas. Or llamas. Or snakes. Or spiders of all kinds. Or dragonflies. Or...Um, yeah,  I'm pretty much a fan of all vertebrates and terrestrial invertebrates and some aquatic/oceanic invertebrates, too, so...take your pick.

Coffee, Tea, or Hot Chocolate? Hot chocolate all the way. I don't drink coffee because A) I think it tastes and smells disgusting, but even if that wasn't the case B) I can't have caffeine. Tea is OK. Hubby's way into herbal tea, grows/collects and dries herbs and makes his own blends and shit, and I'll drink it mostly to make him happy, but I'm not into it. I do like hot chocolate, though it's hard to find premade mixes that don’t have powdered milk in them (because I’m vegan), so I generally have to make it from scratch, so to speak, and when I do I use cashew milk as the base and I usually add either peppermint or vanilla extract for zing.

Favorite Fictional Character: Can't really pick a fave. So, have a list, probably but perhaps not really in preference order. Spock from Star Trek, who's been a fave of mine since I was 3 and was watching the original Trek in its initial run, and I announced I'd marry Spock one day. Rodney McKay from Stargate: Atlantis and Vala Mal Doran from Stargate SG-1. (Basically, if you cut up those two and glue various bits of their characters together -- and not necessarily their good bits -- you have...me. So I relate really well to both of them, so I like 'em.) Also Jack O'Neill from Stargate SG-1, but he's mostly for reasons of estrogen. (Especially if you stick 'im in dress blues. HUBBA!) Garak from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine because Cardassians Are Love. Jayne from Firefly, also for reasons of estrogen. Big, hairy, dark hair, blue eyes, solid but not too muscle-y...Yep, that's how I likes my men. And Zoe from Firefly, 'cuz OMG she's how I likes my women. HUBBA!

Dream Trip: *sigh* Still Antarctica. It's the only continent I've not been to, and I will get there before I croak, but...not yet.

When was your blog created? IIRC, it was, like, the middle of December 2013. So, I'll have had this thing 5 years soon.

Last Movie You’ve Seen: I couldn't sleep one day like a week ago, so I put on Miss Congeniality, which is one of my favorite movies because Michael Caine. When I can't sleep, I'll usually put on a really familiar movie or TV show and it lulls me to sleep, but it didn't work that time. :(

Song You’ve Had on Repeat: Englishman in New York, by Sting. I have no idea why, but it's been on repeat in my head, though I haven't actually played it lately or anything.

Favorite Candy: Not much of a sweets kind of person. I prefer salty-crunchy. I can eat a whole big bag of crisps (Like, the British ones, which are way better than American potato chips, but American ones will do) easily, but I can't even get through a whole candy bar because, ew, too sweet. That said, I do like Flake bars, but I have to go up to Canada to get 'em. Or else buy 'em online but then usually by the time I get them they're kinda smashed. Or melted. Or both. Better to go up to Canada. Where they have real chocolate and not this sickly-sweet Hershey's crap. *shudder*

Favorite Holiday: When in Canada, Canada Day is quite fun. It's like July 4th only not so...well...chest-beatingly, yahoo-y, "patriotic" 'Murican. (I really, really dislike nationalism and "patriotism" in general but especially the obnoxious 'Murican brand of it.) When in the UK, I have a fondness for Guy Fawkes Night. I guess I like fire and fireworks and things that go boom and shit, only without the "YAY AMERICA!" yelling of America's own "things that go boom" holiday. Other than that...Can't really say I'm into 'em much. They're not even "days off from work" since...Well, I've never had a "real job," and I'm pretty much retired from my unreal job these days.

Last Book You’ve Read: *cough* Does a really long and smutty and slashy Stargate: Atlantis fanfic count? I'm sad to say that, though I was a voracious reader of books when I was younger, I'm really not so much these days. Haven't been for the last decade or so, really. Not of actual books, at least. I do subscribe to and read a number of academic journals, some having to do with science and medicine and some having to do with history, but they're not books. 

Favorite TV Show: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, mostly because it has Cardassians, who are all uniformly awesome, plus all the gritty political and religious goodness and stuff. Except that its last season kinda sucked and did totally WTF things with my second-favorite Cardassian. Close runner-up would be Stargate: Atlantis. Except that its last kinda season sucked, too, and did totally WTF things with McKay, so hmmm. Stargate SG-1 is good, too, except that half its team annoys the piss outta me...although this is largely made up for by the hotness that is Jack O'Neill so there's that. I like Firefly a lot but it was so short-lived that it's hard to really be a favorite because I can watch the whole thing, including the movie, in less than a day. (And believe me. I have.) I like the other Star Treks, too, especially if I'm in the mood for the "goofy soap opera in space" that is Voyager. TNG's shiny-happy Roddenberryness kinda bores the piss outta me, though it does have a few really good episodes, and the original show...Hmmm...Well, I both love and hate it. I love Spock, as I said, and I also love McCoy and all of its secondary characters. The problem is that I hate Kirk. Like, viscerally hate him. Like, I want to punch his face in every time it's on-screen. If he'd just, y'know, been eaten by a salt vampire and Spock and everyone else was OK and went off and had cool space adventures battling giant space-going amoebas and shit, I'd be totally happy and that's what fanfic's for *cough*, but since Kirk doesn't get eaten by a salt vampire...well...

Who’d You Most Like to Have Lunch With? @holleyberry :) Dude, we should totally hook up (No, not THAT way!) when I'm in SoCal next. Which won't be soon if I have my way, but when I am there....

[dailybestiary]

Moloch

(Illustration by Kieran Yanner comes from the Paizo Blog and is © Paizo Publishing.)

Hold on to your tophets, ladies and minotaurs…it’s Moloch time!

Moloch’s inspiration is a Canaanite god who gets a lot of bad press in the Torah and the Bible—two holy books that, let’s be fair, don’t exactly have a track record of playing nice with the neighbors.  But Moloch also gets some pretty bad press from the Greeks and the Romans, and the phrase “child sacrifice” gets thrown around a lot, so I’m perfectly fine with him being used as an archdevil.  (There’s actually a post floating around the Paizo Blog that basically says, “Well, that’s kind of how religion worked in those days”…but I possess the ultimate authority on good vs. evil—Monte Cook’s Book of Vile Darkness (what, you were expecting Spinoza?)—and it firmly puts child sacrifice in the Evil category, so screw Moloch.)

In early editions of AD&D, Moloch ruled Malebolge as Baalzebul’s viceroy.  In 3.0 and 3.5 Moloch had an even rougher time of it, getting replaced first by the Hag Countess and then Glasya.  Pathfinder’s Moloch, on the other hand, is firmly in control of both the Sixth Layer and indeed all of Hell’s armies.  If you’re looking for a devil who’s a servant or a patsy of another power, Pathfinder’s Moloch is definitely not it.

Probably the four most interesting things about Moloch are as follows:

1) Moloch is publicly worshipped.  Devil worship is not popular, by and large.  Even for truly dastardly faith communities, worshipping gods, even evil ones, is a safer bet than worshipping beings that explicitly come from Hell.  (“Would you like to spend eternity building a pyramid for the Pharaoh God of Taxation and Making Slaves Grovel?  Or go to the place with the fire pits and devils and eternal torment?” “Gosh, the fire pits do sound appealing. But seeing as I’m already experienced at being taxed and groveling...Imma hafta stick with what I know.”)  So devil worship is usually a cult thing.  Heck, even Asmodeus isn’t that popular in any land where he doesn't have governmental backing—without a throne, inquisition, or similar power structure in place, his church is at best seen as a necessary evil. The other archdevils’ cults mainly stick to the shadows.

But not Moloch.  His worship happens out in the open.  His followers build giant sacrificial ovens. Whole armies subscribe to his message. Of all the archdevils, he is the one most likely to be worshipped under the glaring eye of the midday sun.  And he gets that worship, because…

2) Moloch is responsive.  He answers the prayers of his followers—often in a quite literal and personal fashion.  Is your village threatened by flood?  Forget subtle shifts in tributary courses—Moloch just shows up in avatar form and dams the river.  Is an army about to ransack your town?  Moloch’s army is bigger, assuming he doesn’t just squash the looters himself.

Yeah, the price for this prompt and professional service is an eternity slaving away in Moloch’s army for anyone who asks for his aid or offers even the slightest hint of praise. But when floods, rapine, and slaughter regularly threaten your subsistence-farming-level existence, being a mule skinner for an archdevil might seem like a decent trade, especially if you don’t have to pay it off till you’re dead.  Which means that Moloch has a surprising number of worshippers, despite being a walking metal furnace that swallows victims whole and to burn alive in his stomach. Speaking of which…

3) Moloch has interesting symbolism and visual associations.  Which means interesting worshippers and sidekicks.  He’s got a bull thing—use some minotaurs as his cultists.  He’s got a furnace/child sacrifice thing—use the tophet. He’s got a walking, fiery suit of armor thing—there are tons of constructs, golems, elementals, devils, and undead like that.  And he’s a general—which means animate war machines like juggernauts or colossi.

With a lot of archdevil nemeses, the PCs’ journey fighting their servants goes tiefling —> lesser devil —> medium devil —> nasty devil—> archdevil, with maybe a fiendish dragon or something in there for variety.  Moloch’s followers are waaay more interesting that that.  Literally any soldier of any race might be found in his legions, either living, undead, as a fiendish version of itself, or as some kind of twisted einherjar. Pick up thematic cues from his description and his mythology and go nuts.  

And since we’re on the subject of him being a general…

4) Moloch is a general.  He’s the leader of Hell’s armies.  This means facing him is going to be like facing any general with godlike power.  He’s going to have lots of troops he can call for aid. He’s going to have aerial assault teams and assassination squads and giant hellfire-fueled juggernauts.  He’s going to be physically powerful himself, and canny and strategic as well.  If you come at him, you risk literally having all the armies of Hell chasing after you.

That said, it also means he has other fish to fry.  He has Heaven assaulting one front and the demon hordes assaulting the other.  He has lesser generals and colonels who want his job.  He has some mighty demanding bosses to please.  And, as noted above, he’s very attentive to his flock.  No matter how big you think your beef with him is, you’re probably the lowest item on his to-do list.

Which means you might be able to sneak into his vast army camp and ambush him.  You might be able to challenge him to single combat to gain some small concession.  You might be able to put a treaty in front of him to sign.  Keep your goals reasonable and small, and he might just to decide to send his flunkies after you in retaliation rather than deal with you personally, or burn your great-grandchildren to cinders a few generations from now…but that’s their problem.  Generals are patient, generals can wait, and generals pick their battles.  He will always come down on you like a hammer, but it might not be today.  And when dealing with archdevils, those are as good odds as you’re going to get.

Adventures are asked to investigate a so-called Children’s Crusade, only to discover it is a sham—slavers are herding the children (and their hapless friar guardians) like cattle to boats crewed by gnolls, hobgoblins, witchwyrds, denizens of Leng, and worse.  The trail leads past strange cyclopean isles to a forbidding and cruel coastal nation of military dictators.  There the children are to be fed to giant, animate tophets meant to fuel the archdevil Moloch’s fires in Hell…unless the brave adventurers step in.

A solar and an uinuja formed an unlikely friendship, despite their differing ethics, spheres of influence, and relative power levels. Now the solar languishes in a Hellish prison, and the plucky azata wants to do what even the archons do not dare: stage a rescue, even if it means facing the Lord of the Sixth himself. Fortunately, she knows some adventures who are just as plucky—or crazy—as she is.

The cult of Mithras has spread throughout the Roman Empire—in particular, throughout the Roman Legions.  But as the cult has spread, so have disturbing rumors about secret rites, bloody and fiery sacrifices, and worse.  At first, the Senate and certain famous adventurers chalk this up to the usual politics and rumormongering Rome is famous for.  But then word comes out of Anatolia that the great god Mithras is dead, slain by an imposter who now usurps his throne and perverts his rites. The usurper is Moloch, and he has turned much of Rome’s military might to his service—for even those who resist his call in life have sullied themselves enough so that he may claim their souls in death.  Worse yet, the dour god Pluto is angered by the potential theft of shades from his kingdom. His priests threaten that if this Mithras/Moloch is not stopped, Pluto will send an army of undead through the Lacus Curtius to drag the Roman army down to the Underworld, no matter what the collateral damage.  Great heroes have to act—and fast.

—Pathfinder Bestiary 6 30–31

(I’ve always thought the rapid spread and equally rapid decline of Mithraism throughout the Roman Empire was pretty fascinating.  So naturally I wanted to give your PCs an excuse to be players in that particular rise and fall.  Now, on to some housekeeping…)

Edit: Also, somehow my Google-fu utterly failed me, and nothing I read pointed me to the fact that there was a section on Moloch in Pathfinder Adventurer Path #105: The Inferno Gate. (I had to skip that AP because I was so behind; it’s on my to-read pile.)  I’ll be interested to read how my take conforms (or doesn’t) with Editor Emeritus @wesschneider‘s canon version, but that’s a project for another night.

Hi all.  First of all, again, apologies for the absurdly late post. This article literally sat half-written on my desktop since something like June 18.  We’re talking a month. Sure, this blog isn't the *daily* Daily Bestiary it once was, but I’ve never been as lax with my posting as that.  Two posts in June and none so far in July is unacceptable.

Toyota earned its reputation for amazing cars not through one outstanding model or innovation, but through a company-wide suggestion system that leveraged lots of tiny improvements. Unfortunately, the same is also true in the negative.  There’s no one reason I haven’t been able to blog or one big nightmare I had to tackle (okay, there was one—a four-day, 46-hour workweek that sucked beyond measure—but let’s pretend I didn’t say that).  There have just been a thousand tiny distractions and mini-hurdles.  The short version is: June was lame, I had to take some time for me, I probably took too much, and I’m hopping the end of July is better.  Much love and thanks to you all for your patience, yet again.

Tumblr folk already know this (so forgive me if I quote myself verbatim) but my Blogger folk don’t: My second episode as a guest of the Laughfinder podcast is up!  Once again, I aid Bryan Preston, Jim Meyer, and Tommy Sinbazo to fight evil conjured by Dorian Gray and Ben Hancock.  Once again there are many NSFW riffs on Baltimore landmarks.  And most importantly, my blood feud with Aaron Henkin erupts into passionate FURY.  Enjoy!

[kinetic-elaboration]

October 5: Complete Project List

I feel like I should have spent more time this week reading books and fic because my writing has not been going very well. I just feel so…uninspired. None of my projects are really, I don’t know, calling out to me. I don’t know why.

The only thing I’ve really worked on is my Bellarke High School AU, which I still like, though not as much as I used to. At least that’s something.

I don’t think this is actually going to be helpful but because I feel like I need to be organized and my go-to solution for when I lack focus is just to lay out all my projects in front of me and contemplate them, I’m going to go through my entire current writing folder and see if anything jumps out at me and excites me again.

I currently have 28 documents (though fewer than 28 projects because some of those documents are rejected passages or notes, etc.).

In order of appearance:

HAICG: I really do want to work on this again because it’s been so long and I feel guilty. Also because I had such inspiration and passion for it last summer/early fall. But it will probably require re-reading a big chunk of the fic to get into the style of it again and also I’m not really in ST fandom atm so it’s just...tiring to think about.

The autumn fic: You’d think this would be the perfect time to work on this, it being autumn and all (allegedly) but really I feel nothing for it right now. I still rather like the universe and I’ll probably continue to mess around with it in drabbles and so on, but it was originally conceived of as a multi-chapter fic and that’s…not going to happen anytime soon. It’s one of those ideas that feels very real in my head, strongly atmospheric, but when I try to pin down the plot and put any of it into words…I just lose a lot of confidence in it.

The party fic: I worked on this a few days ago, for the first time since summer, and it was a disappointing exercise. For so long I felt like this was still a front-burner project, even though I wasn’t actually writing it like at all, and now I’ve just realized how far my interest in it and inspiration for it has dropped. I don’t know…I guess I’m not so much abandoning it as seeming it with clear eyes. Low priority.

K/S affair: This really shouldn’t be in my current projects folder. I moved it over from my old projects folder a year ago during my last big ST kick with the thought I might actually work on it but I have not. It’s literally 5 sentences long.

K/S Aftermath story: I’ve been telling myself all year that one day I’m “just going to sit down and write this” and yet. Part of what intimidates me is that I actually did start it but I don’t think I like the beginning so I want to start again, but having a rejected opening puts so much pressure on all subsequent openings not to suck as much. So it’s become a mythical, monstrous thing.

Bellarke Beat AU: So I started writing this in the summer of 2016 during my last Beat phase and I really like what I have! But I haven’t touched it in so long… I tried once but I could see too clearly the seams between the two parts. I feel like one day I’ll pick it up and say “I want to finish this” and then it will be my priority project for a little bit and then it will be finished.

Bellarke Long HS AU: Oh gosh I used to think about this universe a lot when I was in law school. I never got any farther than writing some notes, not even a true outline, but I…just can’t call it abandoned. Initially it was going to be this very ambitious two-part thing but I still hold out hope I’ll write the short one-part thing version. Again, it’s an atmospheric fic that I’m not sure I can actually put into words…

Bellarke HS AU: The only thing I’ve gotten real writing done on in the last week. It’s currently at about 6k words and I’m on the last scene. I imagine it will end at about 8k. Probably my biggest priority if only because it’s the easiest thing I have going at the moment.

BFF Fill: The first sentence of notes on this is so pretentious it causes me pain and I’m the one who wrote it. Which doesn’t mean the actual fic will be bad. I hope. I don’t have a BFF deadline for a while so I’m not worried about it but also I don’t want to constantly do things at the last minute. I’m trying to move beyond that. Currently in the planning stages. I have general ideas and I think I need to distill them into a scene-by-scene outline before I can start writing. (It’s not that it’s that long…I don’t think…just semi-complicated in structure.)

Clarke, Sports Nut: I don’t know why this is a separate document. It’s in the same verse as the HS AU and I’m more than half sure it’s going to be a rejected one-shot opening but I’m keeping it around in case I want to expand it into an actual one-shot.

Dollhouse AU Notes/Chapter 1/Rejected Scenes: I still think this would be such a cool fic. BUT. Every time I start it, I hate it and I need to scrap everything I’ve written. I’ve trashed a huge amount of material by my standards and each time I reject something I lose more hope that it will ever be to my liking. Also, if I did write this for real, it would be an insane amount of work. And the audience for it would probably be small. And the truth is that I’m not sure I could put so much into the actual writing of a fic of this length and complexity for an audience of me. I’ll write smaller fics or even novellettes for an audience of me but some things, the return is just too small… so I don’t know.

Jonty Fluff Fic: I’ve had this idea in my head for a long time—I think it’s actually taken off of one of those AU prompts floating around tumblr—and I actually started writing it after 4x11 because I was so sad and this irredeemably fluffy, guilty pleasure, cotton-candy-in-written-word-form story made me feel better. But apparently I haven’t worked on it since July whoops.

Gina Magical Dystopia: I was going to write this two years ago but my opening sucked and then last summer I brought my notes back and tried to outline it but then I kind of abandoned it again. I’m not going to force it but somehow I think a desire to write it will come back to me sometime.

Bellamy/Jasper Fic: I have a lot of guilty pleasures (I probably wouldn’t feel so guilty for everything if this fandom wasn’t what it is but oh well) but this is probably the guiltiest. The original outline is from April 2016 and last summer I spent an afternoon at the coffee shop actually scene-by-scene outlining it, which means it is basically ready to start. I even wrote the introductory scene but then I scrapped it. The tone was okay but the actual substance wasn’t working for me. So I’d have to start all over. And again, audience of one lol, so there’s that. It’s the sort of thing that if it isn’t completely fun to write there is no point in putting effort toward it.

Jonty Dual Timeline: I had such high hopes for this!! And I still want to write it but I’ve become terrified of it. Terrified I’ve lost the tone, terrified I won’t be able to remember the ideas dumbass-past-me didn’t write down, and of course the passage of time makes the fears worse. It’s been months since I touched it. I think I’d need to sit down, re-read the entire thing, write down any thoughts I can salvage, and maybe rough-outline the rest. Then I can return to writing it.

Old prompt list/old prompt fill: Basically the appendix of this folder. By which I mean, it’s vestigial.

Monty S3 (original and edits): I’ve done one complete read-through of this fic and made some fairly big edits, deleting some parts, re-writing them, moving some things around. I feel like, except for the part in the middle where I made the biggest changes, it reads well. I like it. But I won’t post it until I’ve re-read the entire thing again, preferably in one sitting, and given that it’s 12k long I’ll need to devote a decent chunk of time to that. I’d like to say that this fic I’ve been working on for six months is done, so in that sense it’s ‘urgent,’ but on the other hand I don’t think it’s anything most people will notice.

Sleeping Beauty AU: A request but I’m getting kind of into the idea. Unfortunately (?) my ideas for it are getting ambitious and complicated. It could be so cool! Or it could be something that’s actually finished this decade and I’m just hoping these aren’t incompatible goals. Currently in the planning stages.

K/S comparison: Again, a fic I moved to this folder when I was back into Star Trek in Summer ’16 and feeling ambitious. Aaaaand I just looked at the last updated date. It’s from 2010. That’s wild. I am the slowest writer in the world. Or the most stubborn. Or both.

Story Idea Master List: self-explanatory.

K/S and Spock!Prime: Okay this fic is dumb because it’s FINISHED. It’s been finished for years. I found it in my old writing folder, complete, not posted, and I read it and thought it wasn’t horrible but that the beginning was…actually sort of horrible. So I thought I’d re-write that part and then just post it but it’s not working terribly well and increasingly I just feel like…is it worth it? The fic isn’t that good. But it’s not terrible and it is complete so… I don’t know.

…So yeah as expected this just confirmed what I already knew, that I currently lack inspiration or passion for pretty much any project. AWESOME.

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

Birthdays, quinoa and not reading books | July Goals Update

Hey People of Earth!

A) Just want to say, I looked over my June Goals Update post before this, and ohhhh myyyy, am I feeling so much better? I know in that post, I was *not* in a great place, but I’m happy to report I’m doing so much better now!

B) There was no b I don’t know why I did this whole ABC thing.

Alrighty.

WHAT A MONTH.

I honestly am so amazed July is over, but also am not amazed because it’s felt like three years, but it’s also only felt like two days. So. That’s my current aesthetic.

I don't really know how to preface this post. There isn't much to say... I mean, I had a good month? But let’s just get into these goals.

1. Hit 100k in FOSTERED #5

HIT 118K BABY.

(I’m so proud of this goal, lol. So, so proud.)

(Good job. Good. Job.)

2. Outline more of ALANNIS, and like maybe try to finish it, though I mean this isn’t going to happen, so yeah, just work on it pls

You know how last month I said I didn't even touch this thing? Well guess who did the same thing this month. ;)

I’m sorry Matthew. I am so sorry.

Matthew drawn by @sarahkelsiwrites​ ^^^ 

(In other news, I’ve gotten a BUNCH of new ideas [by bunch I mean like 2 but] for this book and for its sequel, so does that count? Planned an awesome Matthew + Harrison + Lonan scene in the car driving up to New York, so fun timez.)

3. Upload another video.

I UPLOADED THREE VIDEOS JUST ROUND OF APPLAUSE ROUND OF APPLAUSE MY FRIENDS.

HONESTLY JUST A GIANT YES TO THIS ONE YESSSS.

4. Read a book yo.

HONESTLY JUST A GIANT NO TO THIS ONE HAHHAHAAAAAA.

ha.

h

a

I did not do this.

I’m sorry. OKAY WAIT BUT.

I finished reading what @sssoto has written in her WIP RENAISSANCE so that totally counts right. Yeah. Yeah totally. (GREAT BOOK.)

5. Finish another character portrait

Honestly Rachel, slay your life right now, just slay it because guess who did this... I think I did this in July? But I painted @sarahkelsiwrites‘ character Delilah from her WIP STICK PEOPLE. Hopefully I did this in July.

I mean I don't mind this, but I liked Sarah’s sketch better. Which looked like:

I also painted Lonan (again) this month:

I was also trying to be a nice person by surprising @sarahkelsiwrites with a painting of Simon from STICK PEOPLE (which she doesn't know about) and then it started looking like Clifford but right now it looks like a Simon Clifford morph and I just quit with this painting:

I sketched Simon a looooong time ago traditionally, so went in Krita to adjust it to look less shitty and then Clifford showed up and I quit. Also looks like Ben. So. Goddammit Benjamin.

Surprise @sarahkelsiwrites.

6. Write at least 100 words in the I’M DISAPPOINTED short story.

OKAY so this goal.

I’m kind of probably most likely going to scrap this goal.

My goal for this year was to write two books and a short story, buuuuuut here’s the thing... GREAT things (sort of) have happened in the development of I’M DISAPPOINTED, and I’ll go more in depth in my writing update, but I just... don’t feel comfortable writing this short story until I fix that book. This is because the changes I've come up with will most likely change a lot of character motivations etc towards the end of the book, and since this short story comes after that, I just don't know. I want to write this thing so much, but I just can’t write it without patching up the book first. With that said, if a short story presents itself for me to write, I’ll still keep this goal under my belt, buuuuuuuut yes. So rip goal 2k17.

So that was it for this month! I did a lot better than I thought I would. Here are my goals for August:

1. Hit 140k in FOSTERED #5

It’s kind of nuts to jump from last month’s goal of hitting 100k to 140k, but I’m almost at 120k now, and I usually aim for 10k a month, soooo...

2. Outline more of ALANNIS, and like maybe try to finish it, though I mean this isn’t going to happen, so yeah, just work on it pls

PLEASE.

3. Upload another video.

4. Read a book yo.

DUUUUUDE PLEAAAAASE IT’S BEEN LIKE 2 MONTHS.

5. Finish another character portrait

6. STOP IGNORING I’M DISAPPOINTED.

So. Since getting these new ideas for I’M DISAPPOINTED, I’ve been highkey ignoring this book and pretending it doesn't exist... My actual goal for August is to stop avoiding this book. That doesn't mean working on it. That just means pls just acknowledge it’s a thing pls.

So I think that’s all I want to do... If I could finish FOSTERED #5 in August, that’d be great but also I don't know if it would because I still haven't finished planning ALANNIS so then I’d be stuck writing nothing oh my siiigh.

ALSO HAPPY BIRTHDAY FOSTER AND JULIAN CASABLANCAS BECAUSE BOTH OF YOU HAVE THE SAME BIRTHDAY APPARENTLY AND I HAD NO IDEA MOSTLY HAPPY BIRTHDAY JULES WHO CARES ABOUT FOSTER. (Their birthday is August 23rd, so I’m just putting this here since it will be long gone when I write my August update so yes happy one month in advance birthday.)

Here’s a cake @sarahkelsiwrites, @imdisappointed and I made for Foster two years ago:

To very briefly explain why the cake says quinoa

- Sarah, Ashley and I (and frankly let’s throw in everyone who ever meets Foster ever especially Harrison) have this thing where we enjoy making fun of Foster and his niceness. One thing we constantly joke about is his love for healthy things one would deem ‘boring’ (and by one I mean Harrison), so quinoa was something we used to say often in 2015 to mock this poor, nice boy. We’re terrible people. I actually quite enjoy quinoa. So. (This is just all in good fun.)

Some quinoa excerpts (keep in mind these were written in 2015, which means I was 13, I also haven't edited them at all):

“Okay, that’s it.” Foster says with another grin. “You’re in on this too. Because I personally want to laugh in your face when I see exactly what all of those waffles are doing to Your Royal Fatness.” 

“Fine,” Harrison agrees with a grin. “Though let me tell you, dear Fosever. Eating all of that quinoa from the looks of it, sure as hell isn’t helping.”

ROASTED

“Reeve, you actually might be making the greatest choice of your life right now, because from the looks of it, Fosever still looks twelve.” 

“Says the guy with a secret shrine of Spiderman action figures stuffed in his pockets.” Foster snaps back, the warmth of him passing closer to me swishing by in a half of a second. 

“Go eat your goddamn quinoa, Fosever.” Harrison snaps.

DYING FOSEVER STILL LOOKS TWELVE HAAAAAHA

and:

From next to him, Ris grunts over his steaming waffles, a full mouth when he turns his face toward Lonan who’s got the same laptop in front of his face, furiously tapping at the keyboard as he concentrates. 

Harrison actually reaches over and slams the lid shut. 

“Hey asshole,” he says around his mouthful of waffle. “Put the fucking technology away, and be a little social.”

Lonan’s dead silent on the receiving end, and when I look closer at him, I realize it’s because his fists are tightly clenched and a vein in his forehead’s bulging. 

“That was three full days of work that you might’ve completely ruined!” Lonan hisses, eyes wide and angry as he stares at Harrison who’s scowling around his breakfast. 

“Anyway…” Foster continues awkwardly. “Basically, helping people is sometimes–” He’s cut off as a giant waffle is smothered up to his face, Harrison holding it out tauntingly. “What the hell are you doing?” 

“You know you want the waffle… Waffles...”  

“Okay,” Foster says with an irritated sigh, pushing away Harrison’s outstretched arm. “This is exactly why you’re going to die alone…” 

“And you’re going to marry quinoa–”

And a cake Sarah made for me for Foster’s birthday last year:

The sprinkles make out an F, and yes this was as cool as it sounds.

Fun fact: since Foster out of all of my characters is the only one who has a birthday in the summer [that I know of], it’s the only birthday we ever hardcore celebrate. Sorry everyone else.

This is what Harrison gets on his birthday:

(this was two years ago guess who didn't post about his birthday this year loooool)

and this is what lonan gets

(I wrote this on a table at my library. I wonder if it’s still there. Also two years ago, he got nothing this year.)

(Reeve never gets anything every year.)

(Foster why do you think you’re so special to get cake n shit on your birthday every year.)

(it’s because I’m bored in the summer)

(also I have nothing against quinoa.)

So that’s it for this update!

I hope you enjoyed. I love writing these things. Look out for my writing update which I’m going to draft right now... So hopefully it’ll be up by tomorrow!

Thanks so much for reading!

--Rachel

[alamante]

On June 15, when he packed his AR-15 and drove an armored vehicle onto the bridge near Hoover Dam, Matthew Wright had a mission. He’d gleaned it from a berserk conspiracy theory that circulates mainly online, and now here he was, offline, near a very real dam, with a not-at-all-virtual rifle.

As he blocked traffic, he held up a sign. “Release the OIG report,” it read. He wanted the same thing that so many others that subscribe to the all-encompassing QAnon conspiracy theory want: some sort of proof of a “deep state” conspiracy, run by the liberal elite and Hollywood, to commit and then cover up an array of atrocities, from child sex trafficking to false-flag shootings. And they thought they would find at least some damning evidence in the Department of Justice’s inspector general report on the FBI’s handling of the Hillary Clinton email investigation.

The report he was looking for had actually been released the day before, and it didn’t have any of the information he and the rest of the QAnon followers sought. Of course, the theory’s adherents believe there’s another inspector general’s report they haven’t seen, one with all the “true” information, and they’ll fight to get it.

On the day he was arrested in Arizona on a variety of federal charges, Wright was acting as a soldier for “Q.” That’s the handle of an anonymous poster on equally anonymous message boards 4chan and 8chan and on Reddit since late last year. In letters Wright wrote from jail, intended for President Donald Trump and various government offices, he signed off with the QAnon motto: “For where we go one, we go all.” He also referred to a “Great Awakening,” another likely allusion to QAnon.

Nobody was harmed in the bridge standoff. But Wright’s crusade, along with a handful of other recent incidents, gives us an idea of what QAnon looks like when it emerges from its online cave, blinking in the sun. And it’s a little terrifying.

It Seemed Harmless For A Minute There 

As conspiracies go, QAnon isn’t even faintly plausible. It’s every conspiracy, all at once, an orchestra tune-up of theories. It involves Hollywood, former presidents and the Democratic Party joining up to commit various heinous crimes. And on the other side is an anonymous hero named Q, who claims to have high-level government clearance.

A surface-level glance at QAnon threads on Reddit, 4chan and 8chan will make you cringe well before it’ll scare you. In one post, commenters wondered whether Q was winking at them by making the lights flicker during President Trump’s White House speech last week. The post reads in earnest: “What if the lights going out during the press conference was… the cue(Q)?” 

In another, a Redditor used one of Q’s posts to surmise that Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton’s entire family fabricated the Parkland, Florida, school massacre to “advance the anti-2nd agenda.” Commenters agreed and expressed their anger with all the maturity and expertise of a high school film studies class.

“It’s just like watching V for Vendetta in how the people would trade away their freedom for security,” one commenter wrote.

“The more I’m reading about the Q posts, the more it brings me back to that movie,” said another. “False flags, under-age exploitation, and a top level conspiracy even among a major religion.”

There are hundreds of these posts. Choose any conspiracy you like ― false-flag shootings, underground child sex dungeons run by elite predators, unreleased Justice Department reports that, if made public, would put Hillary Clinton in jail ― and you’ll find them being discussed on QAnon forums.

The Daily Beast’s Will Sommer wrote a great primer on the theory. It essentially goes like this: “Q” started posting weird messages on 4chan last November, leaving “breadcrumbs” for the online masses to find evidence that several top Democrats are about to be sent to Guantanamo Bay, special counsel Robert Mueller is actually investigating Hillary Clinton, etc. Nobody knows who “Q” actually is, and there’s no evidence that the person (or persons) posting under that handle has (or have) any high-level security clearance.

It’s easy to roll your eyes at the QAnon conspiracy theory, in much the same way it was easy to dismiss Pizzagaters as a bunch of lunatics — right up until the moment one of them, Edgar Welch, showed up in Comet Ping Pong pizza parlor in Washington, demanded to know where the child sex dungeon was and fired an assault rifle.  

This Seems Familiar

Thus ended Pizzagate, the real-world violence shattering the suspension of disbelief that had sustained the theory online. Even after Wright’s arrest in Arizona, QAnon has continued apace, undeterred by the fact that the “OIG report” he demanded had already been released, to the great disappointment of Q’s followers.

QAnon adherents are on a collective scavenger hunt of sorts ― the goal varies from unearthing conspiracies between politicians and Hollywood brass to finding a group of elite pedophiles in the desert. In Tucson, a group called Veterans on Patrol, with the backing of QAnon online, is hunting for pedophiles after it stumbled on a homeless shelter in May and decided it was a secret site for child sex trafficking. As Motherboard reports, it is not ― police found no evidence of such trafficking ― but the group is patrolling Interstate 19 in Arizona and demands that police declare a state of emergency. It also posted the QAnon 8chan thread to its Facebook page, asking for the internet’s help in finding the elusive, and nonexistent, pedophiles. A QAnon Reddit post says it is “prepping for battle.”

Of course, another real-life QAnon mission brings another arrest. The founder of Veterans on Patrol, Michael Lewis Arthur Meyer, was collared on Sunday after sheriff’s deputies saw a YouTube video in which he was rifling through private property in his hunt for nonexistent pedophiles. He was arrested on suspicion of trespassing, along with a charge of failure to appear in court on July 17 for an unrelated assault charge. 

Meyer is the perfect QAnon soldier ― committed enough to put his boots on and go LARPing (live-action role-playing) through the desert, unhinged enough to believe that a homeless camp he finds is a child sex-trafficking dungeon and savvy enough to disseminate his findings online to likeminded people. He is too extreme even for some extremists. Meyer and his group were kicked out of the occupation party at a federal building in Malheur National Wildlife Refuge in 2016 after militants accused him of walking in and assaulting a disabled Vietnam veteran.

“I do believe Lewis [Meyer] is a Paid Provocateur by the Fed’s to divide and destroy,” militant group member Blaine Cooper wrote in a Facebook post at the time. Writer J.J. MacNab points out that Meyer was also tossed off of Cliven Bundy’s ranch in Nevada during the standoff over defaulted grazing fees there.

As the Arizona Daily Star reports, Meyer has accused any number of businesses of child sex-trafficking ― various farms and ranches, a building materials company, a mining company, etc. ― their only crime being that they’re in relative proximity to Agua Blanca Ranch, where he uncovered what he thought was a den of illicit activity involving kids.

“What jumped out at me was their ignorance of what things really were. The cooling towers that they were calling watchtowers. Maps being on the wall, which they called a command center. Children’s rooms — that it was something we had created to hold children in. It just seemed ridiculous,” David Cathcart, caretaker of the ranch, told the Daily Star. “They’ve got a hell of a lot better imagination than I do.”

For QAnon, wild imaginations drive the bus. And some of those imaginations are the loudest people on the internet.

Reliable loons Roseanne Barr, former Red Sox pitcher Curt Schilling and Minecraft creator (and Pizzagate supporter) Markus “Notch” Persson have all signed on. Barr and Persson, for instance, tweeted out abbreviations of the QAnon slogan, “Where we go one, we go all,” to millions of followers. And, of course, Infowars’ resident nut Alex Jones is involved ― he said in January that the White House called on him and his team of dinguses to investigate QAnon.

There are so many conspiracy theories under the QAnon umbrella now that anything and everything can feel like a dog whistle to its followers. Recently, followers latched on to Hollywood director James Gunn. Gunn was fired by Disney last week after alt-right troll Mike Cernovich helped surface old tweets in which he joked about pedophilia and rape. Underlying the fake-outrage campaign was the QAnon-friendly notion that Hollywood is lousy with pedophiles. Even Sen. Ted Cruz got in on the fun. 

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[flauntpage]

Blue Jays Mailbag: Which AL East Team Should Toronto Be Most Worried About?

This article originally appeared on VICE Sports Canada.

Andrew Stoeten answers your questions in our Blue Jays Mailbag, which runs weekly at VICE Sports. You can send him questions at stoeten@gmail.com, and follow him on Twitter.

The Blue Jays continue to inch toward .500, and toward relevance in the American League. And although the trade deadline is still more than six weeks away, the thoughts of the fan base seem to have turned to reinforcements, and what the front office can do to make this roster better.

And while no realistic answer about the 2017 Jays' trade prospects is going to be satisfying to fans clamouring for better options in the bullpen, in left field, and at second base, as we open up this week's Blue Jays mailbag, we learn that such trivialities aren't going to stop fans from speculating! So let's dig in, with an especially transaction-heavy early-June edition!

If you have a Blue Jays question you'd like me to tackle for next week, be sure to send it to stoeten@gmail.com. As always, I have not read any of Griff's answers.

At the start of the season, you said the Red Sox were most likely to challenge the Jays for 1st in the AL East. In mid-June, the Yankees have a 3 1/2 game lead. Do you still think the Red Sox are the biggest obstacle in the Jays way to winning the division?

Jonathan

Yeah, I do.

Despite also leading their divisions, I don't think the Twins or the Brewers are real, either.

Which isn't to say that the Yankees aren't better than a lot of people gave them credit for, myself included. I expected that they'd be pesky, and that they wouldn't be pushovers in their games against the Jays, but after all the veterans they traded last July and over the winter, I certainly didn't expect this.

But I also don't expect this to continue. Aaron Judge looks legit, but he isn't Mike Trout. Nothing about Aaron Hicks has ever suggested he's anything close to one of the ten best hitters on the planet. Right now Didi Gregorius ranks just inside the top 60 in wRC+ among hitters with at least 150 plate appearances, and there are six Yankees regulars who rank ahead of him. Six!!! And stupid Jordan Montgomery is giving them productive starts, to boot! That shit is nuts!

These Yankees may not fall off to the point where they're still not really good, but they will fall off. They have 102 games still left to play. A lot can happen. The Yankees entered Monday with a four-game division lead on the second-place Red Sox, who are only 3.5 up on the last-place Blue Jays in the tight AL East.

And while the Red Sox have been a bit of a delicious mess so far, I still think that, top to bottom, they have the most talented roster in the American League, outside of Houston. That usually means they'll be the team to beat. Not always, but usually. And I don't think I've seen enough yet to bet against that. Even with the Yankees doing the best to make us all question everything we've ever believed in.

---

Jays badly need a good lefty in the pen, which LHRP would you like the Jays to target? My pick: Brad Hand.

Newfound Lanny

Yeah... I don't think the Jays badly need a good lefty in the 'pen.

They certainly could use one if a good one came along at the right price, but the acquisition of bullpen lefties seems to have become something of an obsession these last few years among Jays fans who haven't quite yet noticed that they've been doing just fine getting lefties out.

Obviously having Brett Cecil during the club's runs in 2015 and 2016 helped a lot in this regard. And obviously getting left-handed hitters out is important. But do we have to sweat so much about which hand someone throws with when they're doing so?

No. No, we don't.

Hand, as you mention, was the No. 2 lefty reliever on a list of possible deadline trade candidates posted at MLB Trade Rumors on May 19. The only name above his was the Pirates' Tony Watson, whose season has gone sideways since then (he's allowed 10 earned runs over his last 10.2 innings), meaning that you're probably not wrong in identifying Hand as as one of the best options out there.

But considering that, let's play a game…

Player A: .180/.319/.410, .320 wOBA, 47 batters faced Player B: .234/.333/.319, .288 wOBA, 54 batters faced Player C: .182/.333/.277, .278 wOBA, 57 batters faced Player D: .189/.211/.216, .189 wOBA, 38 batters faced Player E: .228/.276/.326, .264 wOBA, 98 batters faced

Player A? It's Brad Hand, and the numbers we're looking at are how opposing left-handed batters have fared against him so far this year.

Players B through E? Joe Smith, Ryan Tepera, Danny Barnes, and Joe Biagini.

The samples are small, yes, but for me it underlines the fact that it's more important to just have good pitchers. Handedness matters, but no so much that we need to use words like "need" or "badly need" about a problem that doesn't really exist.

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Hi Stoeten With Devon Travis out potentially long term, will it take another injury for the blue jays to see what they have in Jason Leblebijian? Tough to watch Barney/Goins every night at 2B. Thanks! Joshua

I get where you're coming from on this, because it definitely has been tough to watch those two at the plate lately, but Goins and Barney have been good soldiers for this club. They seem to be well-liked and well-respected. And given that this a club that relies so much on a pair of injury-prone middle infielders, having backups that are as capable with the glove as those two makes a bit of sense.

The way Leblebijian has hit in Buffalo so far this season, he's earned himself a closer look, but I think the Jays will really have to be compelled to ditch one of Goins or Barney in order to bring him here. And "ditching" them is what would be necessary, because Goins is out of options and Barney can refuse the assignment and elect free agency.

Alternatively, they could DFA Chris Coghlan to clear a spot for Leblebijian and I don't think anybody would bat an eye. But Coghlan may well be the player who is due to lose his roster spot once Steve Pearce is ready. And with Pearce due back soon, and capable of playing a little bit of second base in his own right (especially when the Jays' more fly-ball-heavy pitchers are on the mound), I guess my question is, how badly do the Jays even need to force a move here?

Will the difference between Leblebijian and Goins or Barney for a few days be enough to justify losing a key piece of organizational depth just to bring him up? Or to justify shortening their bullpen? Do we believe enough in his defence and that his Triple-A numbers will translate?

I'm sure it's possible that there could come a point where the front office decides the pros outweigh the cons here, but I don't think the case is overwhelming just yet. Even though, like you, I'm curious to see what he might do, too.

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With Pearce 0 for rehab and Zeke and Coghlan looking less than stellar what can be done with Left Field between now and trade deadline?

Scott

Not to be too glib, but... uh... Steve Pearce can get healthy and fans can start to recognize that Ezequiel Carrera has actually been pretty good?

Shit, he hasn't even just been "pretty good," he's been "good." Maybe even better than good!

Yes, yes, the defensive gaffes are tough to watch sometimes, but Carrera has wiped away all those sins with a legitimately impressive season at the plate so far. Zeke's Thunder has carried him to a .292/.363/.410 slash line, and a 111 wRC+. Part of the reason he's been able to be so good is that John Gibbons has shielded him from left-handed pitching—something that's helped because, despite having a strong reverse split over his three previous seasons, this year, in a tiny sample against lefties, the left-handed hitting Carrera has been abysmal. If Carrera was a true everyday player (like the guys I'm about to compare him to) his numbers almost certainly wouldn't be as good.

Toronto has been missing the versatile Pearce for the last month, but Carrera has held down the fort in left. Photo by Brad Penner-USA TODAY Sports

Still, though, Mookie Betts has a 112 wRC+! Same for Josh Reddick. Miguel Cabrera ranks below Carrera at 110. Also behind Carrera: Chris Davis, Michael Brantley, Wil Myers, Jose Bautista, Dustin Pedroia, A.J. Pollock, and nearly 150 hitters with at least 150 plate appearances so far this season!

I can't imagine he'll keep this up for the whole year, and I do think that left field is a place where the Jays should and will look to upgrade, it's just... I don't know that they're going to have all that much incentive to do anything dramatic. To find a player who will give them more than Carerra is giving them right now—and more than what they'll presumably get from a platoon of Carrera and Pearce, once the latter returns (and no, his rehab stats don't matter)—currently looks like it would be an expensive proposition. That could change, of course—Carrera's production could fall off a cliff and Pearce could come back in as much of a funk as he was in April—but it's really not a problem until it's a problem.

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Hey Stoeten, Big fan - keep it up. Two questions. First, if Smoak continues to be for real in July/August, do the Jays consider doubling-down and extending him again? How good does he have to be, for how long, before there's an extension conversation? (Not advocating for this, just wondering). Second, what's the deal with the Giants? Do they not mind the stench of human urine?

Cheers, Tim

Whoa! Holy hell, man! Let's maybe not rush too quickly into hoping the Jays become the team that signs Justin Smoak to his big post-breakout contract... when he's 32... with a track record that will still be overwhelmingly underwhelming. If, one year from today, this question still seems like a reasonable one—and not totally and utterly batshit, like it would have seemed as recently as April—fire up your barbecue, purchase some illegal fireworks, get liquored up and take a load of air horns up to the roof, because it's time for a goddamn celebration! At that point you can maybe start thinking about thinking about extending Smoak. Until then? Just enjoy the bloody ride and hope it doesn't end in carnage.

As for the Giants, to be perfectly honest, I'd have taken a roll of the dice on Sam Dyson, too.

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