#i haven’t made art in months but WE ARE BACK BABY!

[dungeons-n-draw]

Dorian storm, Master Muse and Son of the Wind

[certifiedlovergirlsstuff]

kiss kiss fall in love | s.r. x pregnant!fem reader

your hormones have peeked at your five month mark. your belly started to properly show now and your tastebuds were only slightly concerning. at least the morning sickness was gone, top two worst things about pregnancy, second having to give birth.

you lounged on the couch as you watched your daughter and husband playing on the floor, bits of their hair covered their faces in a curtain. spencer was already teaching her the ways of chess, she asked him many questions.

“how come the queen isn’t wearing a gold crown? she’s special.” holding a black chess piece in her small palm. you chuckled at the childish question.

“well she is wearing a crown, but if you want we can paint it gold. she is the most important piece of the game.” spencer agreed with annabeth, ruffling her locks. he stood from the ground, made a quick stop to kiss your cheek and went into the hallway to comeback with the craft supplies box. he pulled out the paint pens, “why don’t you decorate all of them how you want? it’ll be our special set.”

annabeth went quick to work on coloring over the pieces, some covered in swirled and dots while others had hearts or stars. she even drew a couple of happy expressions, then one sad one, “because he’s just a pawn.” you and spencer chuckled at her reasoning.

you rubbed your palm along your swollen stomach, old stretch marks reappearing at the bottom. your cotton shorts and simple tank feeling suffocating even with minimal fabric. “oh!” a tiny yelp from your lips, eyes widening and mouth pursing.

spencer snapped his head your way, “what’s wrong?” hurrying over to you. annabeth stopped her work to watch both of you with her big eyes. you let a smile ease onto your face, “the baby kicked.”

annabeth scrambled over, “can i feel?” tucking her hands into her chest for restraint. “of course, sweets. here,” holding a palm out for her tiny hand to sit and you guided it over to where the kick happened.

“try speaking to them. they like hearing our voices,” whispering to your daughter when the baby didn’t kick right away. little annabeth leaned in close, her lips grazing your ticklish skin, “i can’t wait to meet you. i’m gonna be the best big sister to you.”

it took a moment but then another kick appeared, “kick! i felt a kick!” she squealed, giving a little jump to her body. she looked to spencer, “daddy! daddy feel the baby!” reaching for his hand like you did earlier.

spencer cooed and gasped with annabeth when another kick appeared. “hi little one,” spencer whispered close, “i’m your daddy and your big sister is next to me. we can’t wait to meet you.” another strong kick followed.

“okay, how about we give mommy a rest. cause my organs aren’t feeling happy about being a soccer ball.” ruffling at your daughter hair. annabeth pressed a kiss goodbye to the growing baby and went back to her art project.

spencer joined you on the couch, arm thrown behind your head and resting on your shoulders while you leaned into him. “how are you feeling? need anything?” his rich voice caressing your ear and making your heart race.

you turned to him with a bright smile, “i do actually. i need a thousand kisses from you. haven’t been given my usually attention.” pouting exaggerated.

spencer looked surprised, “a thousand? man i must be really behind.” clicking his teeth. you nodded, “you have mister. better get started.” puckering up with your eyes closed.

spencer’s light giggles filled your soul and then his lips on yours caused a craving. “more,” a quiet demand.

a fast peck, “oh this is gonna take awhile.”

a lingering drawl, “we’re getting somewhere.”

another fast kiss, but you could tell spencer didn’t move far away. his breath tingled your wet lips, “i’m gonna have to call hotch to babysit if you want all those kisses.” a fifth kiss before his weight left the couch and his footsteps disappeared. you thought it was a little funny he was gonna call his boss on an off day so your child and his could have that playdate that’s been in the works.

“bethie,” calling for your daughter with outstretched arms. she worked her way beside you on the couch an wrapped her arms in a side hug, here genetic reid puppy eyes glaring upon you. “would you be okay to have a playdate with jack today?” smoothing a hand over the crown of her head.

“really?” eyes wide with excitement. you nodded, “you have to be a good girl for mr and mrs. hotchner. that’s daddy’s boss and our friend, say please and thank you. and also make sure you’re cleaning up after yourself.”

spencer walked back into the living room, “the hotchners are on their way. and they happily agreed to bethie joining them on their trip to the aquarium.” scooping annabeth up, both of them yelling “aquarium! aquarium!”

“i wanna see the stingrays!” annabeth declared to jack when him and hotch appeared at your door fifteen minutes later. the three of you watched the two chat while you packed her little backpack of supplies, you handed it off to hotch with a grateful smile.

“thank you for accepting on short notice. i just really want to be alone with my husband, im deprived of attention. i’m wilting like a flower.” sighing and aching as you talked to hotch.

the older man smiled and lightly chuckled, you’re one of the few to crack that stone facade spencer says. “jack’s been missing her anyway, he was trying for a sleepover as well tonight.” you raised your brows, “we’ll see how the afternoon goes.”

once you were completely alone, you dragged spencer behind you into your shared bedroom. “more kisses please,” sitting at the foot of the bed.

spencer moved to stand in the space between your spread legs, his hands cupping at your cheeks like you were fine china. your wandering fingers slid under his plain t-shirt, sitting in his waistband and rubbing against his slim stomach. “don’t keep me waiting, pretty boy. i will start getting angry.”

spencer bent in and let his plush lips mesh with yours, his nose tickling at your cheek when he changed angles to broaden the intimate act. a hum sounded from your throat as you opened your mouth wider and let your tongue wonder, desperately needing a french kiss. a moan echoed in the room as spencer moved from your lips to your jaw, further down onto your neck.

“this- this is nice,” letting a hand sink into the ends of his hair. your nails scratching at his scalp as your eyes fluttered and pulse spiked.

“i love you so much,” lips causing a shiver to erupt. you sighed, “i- i love you too. so lucky for- for marrying you.” your hands starting to mess with spencer’s belt and zipper.

“gonna show you how loved you are.”

[the-thing-withfeathers]

pushing all the right buttons

a/n: ever since i started writing more & posting, i’ve had sooo much madison muse. so here’s a lil treat of dom!mads. this is also kind of in honor of the encore tour ending, she absolutely killed it this time around & i’m so grateful i got to see her.

pairing: dominant!madison beer x reader

warnings: kinda angsty at first but then smut smut smut, fluff at the end tho!!!! degradation, choking, oral & fingering (r!receiving), cursing, edging, hair-pulling, overstimulation.

summary: after not seeing madison for a bit, you decide to try and get a rise out of her.

•*¨*•.¸¸♪

madison had finished touring about a month ago. you had been at her final show and flew straight back home with her. ever since she’s gotten back though, your affection with her has been limited to kisses & cuddles. you wanted more after months of missing her.

at first, you chalked it up to her mainly being exhausted, which was fair enough, she got up on stage every night to perform her pieces of art. you couldn’t blame her for it. but as time went on, you started to wonder if maybe she lost attraction to you. you had to find a way to get that spark back.

you two were invited to a house party, it was hosted by one of your mutual friends as a celebration for everyone being in one place again.

you wanted to look good. not just good but amazing. you wanted her to notice you, to perceive you the way she used to.

you put on a backless cocktail dress that tied up behind your neck. you wore your down but styled it so it would be curled, your make up highlighted all your best features.

as you got ready in seperate rooms for the sake of having more bathroom space, you hadn’t seen what madison was wearing. your breath caught in your throat the second you saw her. she was in a blue sparkly dress, it was showing off everything you found beautiful about her body. you always thought she was captivating, her beauty unmatched. she had gold hoops on and her hair was tied up with a hair stick in it that you bought her when you visited her in japan.

“hey, baby.” she said, smiling at you. “you look great!”

great? that’s all?

“thanks.” you huffed, “you look amazing. i love the hair stick i got you!” you said, trying to lift your mood.

“i realised i haven’t used it properly.” she said, looking at it in the mirror. “thought it was about time.”

“yeah…” you muttered, grabbing your bag. “we should go. we’re already late.” you said, unclasping your purse to put your phone in there.

“alright, wait for me in the car.” she said, nodding and rushing to put the finishing touches on her make up.

“okay…” you simply said, walking down to the car and sitting in the passenger seat to wait for her.

•*¨*•.¸¸♪

the car ride was mostly quiet, the radio filling the gaps of silence. you realised she needed to focus on the road so you just used your phone for the drive.

when you both arrived, the party already had a handful of people in attendance. you two walked in and madison was immediately whisked away by her friends that have been waiting to see her when she got back, leaving you to fend for yourself a little bit.

you walked over to the drink table, pouring yourself something into a red solo cup. you feel a hand touch your shoulder.

it’s a girl you hadn’t met properly before but you know she had worked with madison on one of her music videos.

“heyy girl! oh my god, that dress is so pretty! i NEED to know where you got it!” she said, grabbing herself a drink too.

“awh, thank you!” you said. “um… i actually thrifted it. i made altercations to it myself.”

“what?! that’s insane. it looks like it hasn’t been touched at all!” she said, looking at the dress a bit closer. “you’re too talented!”

across the room, you felt eyes burn into the back of your head. you felt yourself to turn to where madison was talking to one of her friends, you two made eye contact. she didn’t look too happy. that wasn’t the reaction you wanted initially, but if it meant she paid some attention to you, maybe you would have to work with what you had.

“you’re too sweet.” you said, turning back to her. “but yeah! i alter a lot of my clothes, it’s just something i learned how to do.”

“that’s crazy. i think i’d just ruin my clothes if i tried.” she laughed, covering her mouth as she did. you laughed with her, it was geniune but you had to sell it. you leaned forward, touching her shoulder. she put a hand on your waist as you two made contact, laughing together still.

you found yourself chatting to this girl— who you found out was named gracie, actually having a decent conversation. you two talked about your jobs, your hobbies, and even a bit about your childhoods before you exchanged instagram handles.

while yes, you were partially using her to make madison jealous, you were excited to make a new friend on your own, at a party where you only knew a handful of people.

the whole time, you felt madison’s eyes on you. she kept glancing at you, a fire in those angry eyes.

•*¨*•.¸¸♪

madison felt herself scowl at the two of you. one of her friends, nick, started laughing at her.

“dude, you’re going to wrinkle if you keep doing that.” he chuckled, following her eyeline until he saw what she was looking at.

madison didn’t mean to be distant from you, she didn’t know why she wasn’t giving you the affection you wanted. she kept finding herself having to fulfill obligations from her work. she failed to realise you were needing her just as much.

she was seething seeing another girl give you the attention that she should have been giving to you.

she caught you excusing yourself for a moment and decided to make her move then.

“be right back.” she said, shoving her drink into nick’s chest and practicing stomping towards you.

•*¨*•.¸¸♪

you excused yourself from gracie to go find the bathroom. you struggled for a moment to find it before taking a chance and pushing one of the doors open to reveal it. you stepped inside and just as you were about to close the door, madison practically shoved the door open.

“mads— what—“ you were cut off by her hand wrapping around your throat, shoving you against the tile on the wall.

“my sweet girl, you thought you could just flirt with some other bitch and get away with it?” she asked, her sultry voice bouncing off the walls. “were you trying to upset me?”

you clawed at her hand, trying to push it away as tears welled at your eyes. as much as you were struggling to breathe, a part of you was excited to finally get what you wanted. you shook your head in a lie, whimpering softly as her hand pressed harder.

“well you sure as hell did.” she said, pressing kisses to your cheek. “are you a little slut for me? is that what you are? were you just being needy?”

you nodded, trying to gasp for air. as you tried to breathe through it, you felt a wetness pool at your core. you loved when she was gentle with you— but you loved this side of her just as much.

“well, you must be happy cause i’ll give you what you want, baby.” she said, her hand releasing your throat. you quickly inhaled the fresh air coming through the open bathroom window. you coughed a little, the air hitting your dry throat.

she pushed herself against you, straightening your back and her hands immediately found themselves lifting your dress. she turned you around and bent you over the sink.

“needy fucking whore.” she muttered, squatting down to pull your panties to your ankles. “fuck… you’re so wet. you love when i just throw you around, don’t you?”

“mmph… love when you throw me around.” you mumbled, holding onto the edge of the bathroom sink for dear life.

madison’s hand came down to smack your wet cunt then immediately after, started circling your clit with the pad of her thumb. you gripped the sink harder, crying out at the pain from the smack. “fuck!” you wailed out, your body jolting at the sudden contact.

“be quiet, bitch.” she said, sharpness on her tongue. “i wanna fuck you into oblivion, we can’t do that if someone catches us.” she said, smacking your pussy again. “you were being a bad girl…” she said, “this is what you deserve.”

you covered your mouth to prevent yourself from crying out again. you felt her mouth make contact with your wetness, her tongue fucking into your hole while her fingers worked your clit. your head fell down, your cheek against the counter. you were holding back moans but your efforts weren’t enough. you were crying out softly every time her tongue pushed into you, tears starting to fall out of your eyes.

this, paired with your touch-starved delirium, made you build towards an orgasm quickly— it didn’t even take madison a few minutes to get you close to the edge. when madison started to feel you shake, she immediately pulled away.

you sighed softly, realizing that you had been holding your breath in. your body relaxed but suddenly tensed up as madison’s fist bunched your hair up into a ball and she yanked you up, your back to her chest.

“look at yourself.” she ordered, forcing you to look at your red tear-stained cheeks. “so fucking good for me. am i really making you feel that good?” she asked, a smirk forming on her face as she laughed at you— it was embarrassing, she was taunting you. “you did this to yourself by thinking it was okay to let someone else touch you.”

“i’m sorry, mads.” you said, desperately wanting her to finish the job.

“sorry won’t do anything, baby. just let me do what i want to you then we can talk about forgiveness.” she said, her hair coming out of your hair and onto your breasts. she tore your dress open like it was nothing, you gasped at the gesture.

“if you’re so good at altering your clothes, you can put it back together.” she said, your breasts bouncing out of the dress. she moaned seeing them come out, your nipples hardening in the breeze.

her hand found its way around your throat again, applying less pressure than earlier but still enough to restrict your airways a little bit.

“watch me fuck you.” she said, holding your neck in place so you were watching. “watch yourself cum.”

she quickly found your clit again, your legs opening just a little bit more for her. she roughly rubbed at it with her middle finger as she placed her chin on your shoulder. she was watching you too. your hand found itself gripping onto her dress while the other was on the bathroom counter, stabilising yourself. you wanted to make noise but couldn’t get anything out because of her hand wrapped around your airway.

“i can feel you trying to moan, that’s so fucking hot.” she whispered, hot breath against your neck. “so fucking hot, baby.” she said, her finger suddenly entering you. you closed your eyes, the feeling was euphoric.

“hey!” she snapped. “eyes open.” she said, pulling her finger out to smack your ass. you whimpered at the loss of the build-up again, forcing your eyes open as she put her finger back into you.

“that’s it, love. you’re being good now.” she said, affirming you. you found yourself smiling at the sight of the two of you— you’ve been waiting for this for over a month and it’s just as good as you were expecting.

you felt that knot in your stomach start to form again, your grip on madison’s dress getting harder. she pumped her finger in and out of you quickly, her thumb supporting the motion by pressing against your clit. her grip on your throat loosened and you immediately let out a loud moan.

“mads.. mads, i’m gonna cum.” you managed to get out. your legs starting to grow weaker and your eyes starting to roll back into your head. you were seeing stars at this point.

“cum for me like the good whore you are.” she said, inserting another finger into you. “maybe i’ll forgive you then.”

it didn’t take much convincing for you to cum all over her fingers, crying out her name as your hand flew to her hair gripping as the tension in your belly snapped. your legs were shaking as she took her fingers out of you. you couldn’t hold yourself up anymore and fell down onto the floor, your back against the cold marbile bathtub.

“my pretty, pretty girl.” she cooed. your legs were still open so she brought her thumb to your clit again, earning a few jolts from you as you rode out your orgasm.

“you think i’m pretty?” you asked, a small soft smile forming on your face.

“i think you’re the most angelic creature to ever walk this earth.” she said, collecting your juices in her fingers, licking them clean as she pulled away.

“you haven’t made me feel pretty recently…” you pouted, your head reeling from the mind-blowing orgasm you just had. you’re pretty sure you lost control over your words.

“oh my baby… my sweet baby… if i ever do that again, you kill me on the spot.” she said, regretfully. “i’m sorry… let me make it up to you?”

you nodded with a toothy smile, your arms pulling her in for a hug. you were happy to have your girl back.

you two sat for a moment before you found your footing, standing up with madison’s help. you noticed your dress was ripped open still but neither of you had anything to cover you up.

“mads… you tore my dress.” you complained.

“oh! yeah… you may have forgiven me but i haven’t forgiven you.” she giggled. “second part of your punishment! walk back out to our car like that.” she said, turning you around to face the door.

“WHAT?!” you exclaimed.

“everyone’s drunk, they won’t notice a thing. they’ll probably forget about it too!” she defended her decision— which was totally not made just cause she got carried away by accident.

“mads… you can’t be serious.” you whined.

“oh i’m dead serious.” she nodded and slapped your ass.

“now walk, bitch.”

[s-4pphics]

click!: in frame. 2 (e.w.)

SYNOPSIS: you crave redemption more than love. [idk au]

WORD COUNT: 11.5k

WARNINGS: professionalphotographer!ellie, strugglingartist!oc who’s black, ANGST!!, daddy issues, SA/victim blaming :(, homophobia LOL, anger issues\violence, bad parenting, anxiety, joel standing on bidness, FLUFF!! :3, SMUT… MDNI, ellie bottoms YAAAS, virginity mentions, jealousy😂, dubcon (they’re high), more fingering, brief mentions of cunning lunning, squirting, mult. big Os, err dassit

A/N: YYYYAASSSSSSSS hi… bye 

APRIL, 2014

Happy birthday, babe, you whisper in your girlfriend’s ear, arms wrapped around her neck from behind. Ceniyah’s giggly thank yous fill your ears and heart as you press smacking kisses on her cheek. 

I made you something… You reach behind and grab the rolled-up poster paper sticking out of your backpack, making sure Ceniyah doesn’t turn around. She seems giddy and your heart soars. You hope that all-nighter was worth it. Please, you pray to yourself, please love it. 

Close your eyes and gimme your hand, you say and she listens, palm open in front of your face. You place the scroll in her hand and she gasps. She whips around to face you, shock written all over her, and you giggle. She unrolls the painting and her head instantly falls back, tears jerking behind her glasses. 

Are you seriously crying right now! You pull her tight to your chest and she sobs into your neck, C’mon, baby, stop cryin’! S’okay. You coo and her arms tighten around your waist. 

D-D’you like it? Your face burns when you whisper. 

Are you fucking serious! She squeaks into your neck, It’s beautiful, baby, I love it. T-Thank you—

I love you so much, you mumble, and she says it back. 

You haven’t slept at all. Your body’s going to collapse soon. You hope it’s not during this phone call. 

You ogle at the small card in your hand, pressing the digits into your device before hitting the call button. It rings twice before a bright voice answers. 

“Hello, this is Lisa Meyers speaking. How can I be of service?”

… Interesting intro. “Good morning, um, Professor Meyers?” 

“Yes, how can I help you?” 

“I… we spoke at the coffee shop yesterday. About the… assisting art professors alumni thing.” 

“Oh, of course! How are you, dear?”

“I’m good. Um… I was wondering if you’d have some time to speak with me about it... If that’s cool.”

You can hear her wide smile through the line, “More than cool! Would you be able to come into the office tomorrow?” 

An extra day in the city wouldn’t hurt (it would), “No problem. What time were you thinkin’?” 

“My mornings are always open! How does ten sound?” 

“Sounds like a plan. Uh, thank you,” you say with twitchy fingers. 

“Course, hun! I’ll put you in and I’ll see you tomorrow!” 

You never expected to end up back here. 

The campus art studio looks exactly the same, only now the old portraits, sculptures, ceramics that were lined up on shelves of the display case are all replaced with new, nameless ones. You’re not used to seeing projects that you couldn’t attach a name to in the classroom. Your university years never feel that long ago, but the randomly placed structures are proof of your long-term absence. 

Time is an illusion… Or you’re getting old as fuck and about to be lowered into the ground. Freshmen make you sick(affectionately). 

Professor Meyers explained the position well enough for you to manage on your own. The work you’re doing isn’t difficult: oversee, assist in grading, oversee some more, oversee, and guide. You’re practically getting a check for being the already observant individual that you are. It’s a steal! 

The position only lasts around a month, but Professor Meyers was convinced that it would only take someone as talented as you (her words… although you agree) a week to get on her toes. You vowed to bring your sketchbook every day from here on out, both to yourself and to her, in case you get the inkling of inspiration that you desperately need. 

The job’s a small win. That’s all you could ask for right now. 

Fuck all that shit you said at the start of the week. TAing fucking sucks. And you still haven’t had any inspiration despite all the efforts from the students! Whenever you pick up a utensil, you stab through your paper. You’ve officially lost your touch. You’re a regular bitch with no talent! What the fuck is going on! 

You’ve had numerous breakdowns in bathroom stalls since Monday, and you’re bound to have another one in the next fifteen seconds. Why the fuck did so many students leave their filled water cups on the fucking tables. Guess who has to clean all that shit up! You! Fuck freshman(unaffectionately). 

You’re so happy the halls are empty in between rotations. No one needs to watch you sobbingly wipe down tables splattered with paint. 

After Professor Ronson’s room is tidy, you start prepping the board for the next rotation of students. They’re learning about anatomy today; There’s bound to be at least three students that scribble tiny dicks in the corner of their starter pages. You hate it here. 

You open the drawer to retrieve all the sharpeners, only to find the container completely empty. You’re sick of the animators not putting shit back. You begrudgingly make your way back down the hall and into Professor Lacey’s room… You should’ve never left.

Your lungs constrict with your gasp and you almost drop your keys. 

A just as shocked Ellie gawks back at you, laminated name tag with YEARBOOK dangling from the camera strap around her neck. 

What the fuck.

Ellie’s either hallucinating or dead. Yeah… She has to be dead. The haunting of your email was too much and she died and now she’s seeing shit—

An angel disguised as you is staring back at her, fist clenched under the sleeves of your sweater, brown eyes just as stunned as hers. Ellie barely has time to gather words before the chains hooked onto the pockets of your jeans jingle as you step out of the room and scurry down the hallway. Ellie’s feet are flying before she can even register their movements, hot on your trail as her camera bounces on her chest. 

She manages to get close enough to grab your bicep, ignoring the stuttering in her heart when she sees the former light in your eyes replaced with something darker. The flourishing storm in your pupils is uncontrollable. 

Ellie drops your arm when she realizes you won’t run, “W-What are you doing here?” 

Your gaze is locked onto the tile squares on the ground. “I-I’m, uh… just enjoyin’ the weather— “

Ellie’s brows pull downward, eyes flicking towards the badge wrapped around your neck. Do you work here? “We’re indoors.” She mumbles dryly. 

“Nothin’ like… the spring rain hittin’ the windows, am I right?“ You huff with a nervous smile, eyes flitting around the hallway as you search for an escape. Ellie’s not having that. 

“We needa talk.” 

You sigh, “I can’t. I’m working.” 

“So am I. Take your break,” Ellie grabs your wrist and drags you back down the hallway, leading you to the bathroom and pushing you into a stall, locking the door behind her. 

Her voice is quiet when she presses, “The fuck are you doing here?” 

Ellie expects you to snap, to push the same questioning back onto her, but you don’t. Your mouth gapes like a fish as you stumble over words. Ellie’s eyes soften when she sees a shaky hand come up to pin a loc behind your ear. You’re shaken up and she instantly notices something off. Your demeanor has shifted immensely since she last seen you and it’s making Ellie’s stomach twist with discomfort. She's never seen you this stunted. 

“What.” Ellie asks when you mumble to the floor. 

“I’m sorry about the email,” You sound winded, “I thought… I dunno. I’m sorry about everythin’.” Your lip starts to quiver as you ramble, “I would’ve never come if I knew, I’m sorry— “ 

… What the hell are you talking about? And why are you crying? 

You sniffle and wipe your tears with your sleeves and Ellie’s fingers itch to comfort, to dry your face herself, but she doesn’t. She watches you weep into your palms for what feels like hours, the air of the restroom suffocatingly tight. 

“I didn’t mean to ruin anything you h — had going on, okay? I’m sorry… I’ll leave right now! You’ll never have to see me again— “

Your sobs are stressing her, “G-Gimme your phone.” Ellie blurts. 

You're already digging in your pocket for your device to unlock it, “W-Why— “

Ellie snatched it from your hand, heart pulling when she sees a photo of younger you being carried by a woman shoved in your case. The same face that was littered all over your apartment, “You wanted to talk so bad, right?” Ellie presses her new number into the pad and calls herself, “You have my number. My…” 

When she looks up, her words get swallowed up; Your eyes still manage to glow under the… horrific bathroom lighting, glittering like stars in the late night. She clears her throat to catch herself, “My shift ends at four. Call me any time after that.” 

Ellie hurries to unlock the stall before leaving you in the bathroom, heart in her throat as she heaves all the way down the hallway to the lounge, shaking her hands to get the jitters out. 

She knew she should’ve never accepted a call from the alumnus association. Fuck the yearbook. 

You clock out with a heavy, anxious heart. 

Three students came up to you and asked for advice on their starter shapes. They were a bit upset when their circles didn’t come out perfect, and you almost cried. It was too sweet. Your bag bounces off your back as you descend the staircase to exit the building. The droplets hit your hood with fever as you skip to your car. You jump into the driver’s seat to turn the heat on, teeth chattering from the evening breeze. 

You check the time on your dash and… it’s way past four. You hope Ellie’s willing to meet. You dial the most recent number and tremble as the phone rings. She answers after the second tone. 

“Hello?” 

She sounds so relaxed, and your shoulders unlock, “… Hi. It’s… me?” 

A lengthy pause, “… Me who?” 

You hide a snort, “Um… ex-roomie?” She chuckles lightly. “Hi.”

“… Hi.” You whisper, “Did you, um… still wanna talk to me?” You think you hear the click of a lighter. 

“Mhm. I’ll send you where I stay at.” 

“Okay… I’ll see you soon?” 

“Yup.” And with that, the line goes dead. Ellie’s location delivers not even a minute later. Her hotel isn’t far from here. . . and fuck, it looks like wealth. Your nerves are nowhere near settled after your last attempt at reconciliation, and paranoia is itching beneath your skin. 

You open your GPS and blast your screamo playlist, hollering your way down the street with your windows down, rain be damned. 

You’re burning holes through Ellie’s hotel room door. 

You haven’t knocked, you haven’t rang. . . you're not even sure if your text of arrival went through. You just stare at the peephole with a clenched jaw. This big bag of Cool Ranch Doritos is doing an excellent job as a stress ball. It’s bound to pop from your grip soon.

Your bladder almost lets loose when the door gets pulled open, nostrils instantly hit with wafts of that forbidden flower. You’re pulled through the small crack by a strong grip before the door is shut and locked behind you. 

Ellie faces you, bare arms on display, and leans back against the door… in those fucking grey sweats. After all this time, they still cause damage to your soul, “Sorry. I don’t wanna get kicked out.” 

“It’s… you’re good.” You point behind her, trying not to gawk at her tattoo, “How’d you know— “

“You breathe loud.” She says simply, tone hushed and raspy. She nods behind you, “Sit down.” 

She follows you to the lounge chairs that face each other. You sit, still tense, suddenly back in therapy, “I-I brought you somethin’.” You push the crumpled bag of chips towards her as she relights her joint. 

Her pink, doe-eyes flit between yours and the bag before she mumbles, “Thank you.” 

“No problem…” You awkwardly set them on the windowsill, swallowing your guilt and deciding to take initiative, “I… I know you have a lot of things going on and I don’t wanna take up too much of your time… I’m just…” 

The loud splattering of raindrops is nerve-wracking, “I wasn’t… I didn’t treat you well. College was a very hard time for me and I didn’t really know how to deal with it without being a bitch—” 

Carbon leaves her nose, “Is that your excuse?”

“N-No, no! I’m not… I’m not tryna avoid blame. I was terrible and you — no one deserved what I put them through… I-I’m really sorry, Ellie… From the bottom of my heart, I’m sorry.”

Ellie’s silent. You have no idea what she’s thinking; She could be plotting to get you kicked out of her room right now and you wouldn’t know. Her stare isn’t angry, it isn’t anything… she just watches you. Every squeeze of your hands, bounce of your knee, every tic photographed in her memory. Just like before. 

“Why're you back on campus?” 

You exhale the breath you’d been holding, “Um… I gotta, like, TA job, I guess. With the art profs.”  

“Still doing art, then, I guess.”

You stare down at your lap, “Yeah. Trying to.” You croak. 

“Trying?” She asks, brows furrowed. Your shoulders bounce in a shrug. “I, err, hadn’t made anything in a while so… yeah. I thought it’d get me back into it.” 

“Are you?” 

“Hm?”

“Are you back into it?” 

“I don’t know yet.” 

“Why were you so upset when I moved out?” Ellie’s tone shifts into something much more delicate, ready to crack and bleed open at any given moment. You can’t tell her, your brain bellows over the pleads from your heart. You can’t tell her how much you missed her!

Your jaw slacks dumbly as you search for a believable explanation, mind blanking under her scrutinizing stare. 

“I was drunk. I-I don’t remember…” 

“You were drunk and don’t remember.” You cringe at her tone. 

“Ellie… I don’t wanna— “

“Don’t wanna what? Actually be fucking honest?” Your babbles are silenced as she rants. “You reached out to me and you can’t even answer one question honestly. Why’d you even come?” She seems so disappointed in your response, but what can you do? Tell her how every part of your body yearns to be next to her? How you almost collapse when you saw her for the first time in what felt like an eternity? How manipulative would that be after everything you’ve done?

Ellie’s index finger jumps on the armrest as silence takes over once more. She’s deep in thought, it seems, teeth nipping at the skin of her lip. 

“Ellie— “

“When I moved out…” She repeats sternly, “you told me you didn’t want me to go. Why did you say that?” 

It’s on the tip of your tongue: because I’m weak and I like you! I’m sorry I didn’t fight! I’m sorry, I'm sorry, I’m sorry! 

“B-Because I didn’t want you to go…” You whisper between sniffles, wiping your nose with your sleeve. 

“Why's that?” 

“I… really liked having you around…” You chose your words very carefully, but they’re not a lie. “You’re… you’re really nice.” 

That seems to satisfy her a little, “I’m really nice?” Ellie’s brow quirks, a tiny smile blossoming on her face. 

“And funny.” You sob, “Like, I laughed a lot.” 

“You’re funny, too,” Ellie says awkwardly while scratching her ear. Your heart pulses. 

Her eyes search yours, “I didn’t know how I would react when you got here. The thought of seeing you really… fucking freaked me out.” She scoffs to herself, and your shoulders begin to droop. “But… um...” She pauses and your pulse pounds in your neck. Tears brim in your ducts. This is when she tells you to leave. To fuck off. To drop dead, for fucks sake—

“I’m glad you reached out.” 

You gawk in disbelief before your bottom lip trembles, “Really?” You ask meekly. She simply nods. 

“Me, too.” You’re really trying not to cry right now, but the softness in her gaze isn’t helping. She’s too sweet. You change the topic before you say something you’ll regret. You point to the bag of chips, “I really hope you like that flavor. I just grabbed it because I was overthinking.” 

“I don’t know why you bought those. I still owe you a bag from what I remember,” She grabs them, squeezing the end until the other side pops open. She grabs four ships and crunches them all at once before extending the bag to you. You follow her lead and munch to your heart's content. 

“I was never mad at you, y’know.” Ellie sets the bag down and reignites her roach. “I wasn’t, uh, innocent, either. We both fucked up,” She puffs and hands it to you. You've never smoked bud before, only stole a couple of Abby’s edibles a while back. She vowed never to smoke with you since you’re a tweaker. 

You accept the charred-to-hell baby jay and stare at it. You shrug, “Wasn’t worse than me. How do I do this without burning my finger off?” 

“Err… just breathe in and hold it.” She instructs. “Have you never gotten high?” 

“I have. I don't— “

“Oh, yeaaah. Non-smoker. Sorry.” 

“It’s fine,” you mumble before bringing the remnants up to your lips and sucking in. Nothing happens. Ellie snickers, “Not like that. It’s not a fucking lollipop. Just, like, fill your cheeks up and hold it.” 

… Are you an idiot? “I don’t know what that means.” Ellie cackles like a witch at your lost expression, nearly falling over in her chair. Your cheeks burn and you try again, cheeks expanding to fill in the smoke. The second you inhale, you start choking, eyes bulging out of your skull from the burn in your chest. 

Ellie finds your near-death experience fucking hysterical as she hollers from her seat. Tears stream down your face and the veins in your neck are bulging as you gasp for air. You’re never doing this shit again. Your lungs finally decide to spare you when Ellie passes you water from her dresser. You gulp that shit down like no tomorrow as Ellie’s giggles dwindle. 

“What the,” cough, “fuck— “

“Fucking baby lungs,” Ellie mumbles with a grin. “You’ll be fine after a couple tries.” 

You chug more water, “Girl… fuck you.” You gasp. Ellie’s grin turns cocky when her head tilts. 

“Fuck me?” Her voice lowers and goosebumps rise on your skin. Your heart stops in your chest and your gaze falls to the floor as your tummy swirls in delight, cheeks fiery. You stand and Ellie sits up at your sudden alertness. 

“Um… Like I said, thank you for taking the time to talk to me today. I really appreciate it.” Ellie stands to grab your arm when your feet slowly start backing towards the door. 

Her smile drops, “I-I’m sorry. I was just kidding—” 

“No, it’s fine! It’s not you! I just, uh… y’know what I mean?” 

“… No.” She mumbles, “You don’t… have to go yet. You just got here.” She chuckles weakly. 

“I just… don’t wanna… pry.” You whisper like it’s shameful. Ellie’s head shakes in denial, “You’re not! I’m… inviting you.” 

Your eyes beg her to understand where you’re coming from. It’s not like you don’t want to, but the two of you just got back cool three seconds ago. The last thing you want to do is force yourself back into her life. Your relationship needs time to marinate and heal before anything else happens… if she allows it. 

“I… I still miss Pickle?” You suggest with bright eyes, and Ellie’s soften despite her confusion. “Would it be okay if I see her?” You ask quietly. 

Her mouth turns upwards, “How long are you in town?” 

“I don’t know… These hotel bills are runnin’ my credit in the fucking mud.” You sigh. 

“She’s with my dad right now. Come this weekend. I’m outta here on Friday, anyways.” She suggests, cheeks glowing in the dimming room. You hope Ellie doesn’t notice your dejection at the mention of her father… It still stings. Her eyes are so hopeful, meadows flurrying with excitement… and you can’t say no. 

“…Okay.” 

“Yeah?” She confirms, smile widening. You nod. “She misses you like crazy.” Ellie notes and tears get to cooking. You think about Pickle every day. Little munchkin. 

“I miss her, too.” You sniffle. The hand that rests on your bicep slowly slides down your sleeve, closing around your wrist. Not strong, but her hold is steady. Ellie whispers your name. 

“Hm?” 

“I’m glad we’re… okay.” Your heart soars with adoration. Her eyes explore your face in admiration, and your body glows. 

“Me, too. Thank you.” Ellie’s gentle gaze drops to your lips and you stiffen. Your hands clench when she moves an inch closer. It kills you to move away, and an inkling of hurt overcasts in her forest. She lets you go and backs away, “Sorry— “

Your head shakes desperately, “S’okay, I just think we should… move… slower?” You never fail to sound like an alien who just arrived on Earth, but Ellie seems to get it. 

“Yeah, I… yeah.” Ellie stares at her sock-covered feet, red dusting her cheeks. You try to hide a smile while she walks you towards her door. She opens it for you, propping up against it. 

“See you Friday?” You throw over your shoulder and Ellie grins. “See you Friday.” She parrots. You can’t stop cheesing even after she closes the door. You make your way back into your driver’s seat, heart bleeding with relief. 

MAY, 2014

Her record is clean! I would’ve never expected this from such a great kid, your professor says to your father, But violence, especially to this extreme, is completely unacceptable—

What about what he did to me! You shout, and your father glares at your tone, He put his hands on me first! H-He—

Your body shudders in disgust at the recall of your classmate touching you the way he did. You were on your way to class when hands enclosed around your chest in a tight squeeze, all oxygen leaving your body. It was abrasive and made your skin crawl, and you swung. Your arms moved on their own until you were on top of him, his nose gushing blood while his friends attempted to pry you off. 

There was laughter when he groped you. So many people — students that you see every day — all watched it, and no one came to your defense. 

Your principal sighs with his palms up, I’m just trying to get to the bottom of what happened—

No, you’re not! I already told you what happened and you’re tryna make it seem like I’m lying! You stand and grab your bag off the floor, stomping towards the door to the office, Y’all can choke—

Your dad calls out for you, and your fingers twitch at his tone, but you keep walking, pushing past the double-doors of the school and towards the bike rack. Tears flood your eyes when the double doors slam shut, your father berating you about making a scene in public. You unlock your ride, blocking out his rampage that draws the security guard’s attention. 

He put his hands on me, dad! You shriek as loud as you can between your cries, He put his hands on me! Why’re you yellin’ at me?

I’m not yelling at you! I’m yelling in general! You scoff and swing your leg over your bike, strapping your helmet on, I’m tryna understand what happened! You broke his goddamn nose! They’re boutta suspend you! 

Imma be at Maya’s, you say, monotone. I’ll see you later. 

Amaya isn’t even home. Your dad’s hollering his lungs out as you ride down the sidewalk, but you block it all out until the wind fills your ears like a monsoon. You’re not sure where you’re going, but it’s somewhere. 

Hopefully somewhere you can cry to yourself without disturbance. 

-

-

-

It’s your first day back at school since being suspended. Fuck everybody… except Amaya and Ceniyah. You probably would’ve switched schools if it wasn’t for them. You can’t wait to see them during lunch and tell them how fucked up it’s been staying at home. 

Today has been weird as fuck, to say the least. Friends that you’ve grown used to talking to in the hallways have either disappeared or ignored you. It’s quiet around you, now, and you’re on edge. What the fuck is going on?

Walking into the cafeteria is frightening. It’s always loud, rowdy, hectic, but the minute you step foot inside, everything seems to stop. You grip your tray so tight; you think it’s about to snap, frantically searching for your girlfriend. 

But your two favorite people are nowhere to be seen. You wander and come up empty-handed. Where the fuck are they—

Your thoughts are cut when a shoulder shoves right into yours. You throw your tray onto the nearest table. Laughter surrounds you before a snarky voice shriek in your ears.

Watch where the fuck you’re going, 

No, you watch where the fuck you’re going. Dumb ass bitch, You spit. You're about to get suspended for knocking this broad out. Who even is this? 

Coming from the slut who cheated on her girlfriend! Are you sure you’re a lesbian? Or are you going back to dick? 

The entire room seems to collapse from top to bottom, crushing you beneath clutter in attempts to suffocate. You freeze when everyone turns to stare at the scene, some standing to surround you, hoping to see a fight. You release a shuddering breath as your fist clench. 

… Cheated on your girlfriend? You love your girlfriend. You’re in love with your girlfriend, and she’s in love with you! What the fuck is this bitch talking about. 

I think she’s going back to dick! One of them laughs, and the rest follow, and the entire room glows red. 

Your knuckles are drenched in the color when your dad comes to pick you up. 

PRESENT

Maybe being a TA is helping. You’ve finally pulled your sketchbook out of your work bag. 

The point of your fine liner hovers over a blank page of your sketchbook. You can’t stop thinking about Ellie, and you don’t have many distractions. 

It’s been so long since you’ve created anything, and frankly, your ass is clenched with anxiety. Never in your life would you think that creating art would wrack your nerves in such a way, but your insecurities are working hard. Probably the hardest they ever have. Once upon a time, your sketchbook was your safe haven, and now the feeling of blank pages feels like needles. 

What if you’ve… lost your talent? You can see everything you want to make clearly in your head but your pen isn’t moving. The attempts at reigniting your passion would be pointless if you can no longer fucking draw. Your fingers are itching. 

Maybe you should try that corny shit from the movies where they close their eyes and move their utensils on pure muscle memory… Maybe you should do fucking shrooms! Visuals always peak on psyches, according to the experts. At this point, why the fuck not— 

“Son of a fucking — this is fucking stupid, bitch, jus’ fuckin’ draw,” you mutter to yourself in agitation. Just fucking draw! You do this! You do this, you do this!

Minutes pass and your paper is mussed with smudged, small ink marks from constantly moving your pen around, trying to find the right angle. Another piece of paper gone to waste. You fucking suck. You slam your pen down on the table. 

You stand and start to pace, “Positive affirmations only,” You remind yourself aloud, “You got this shit, like, what the fuck. Everything’s gonna come back to you. You’re in a funk and tha’sit. It’ll pass, it’ll pass— “

Whoever your hotel neighbor is… Praying for their sleep schedule. 

It’s going to be a long night. 

“Hello?”

“Hi, kiddo. Sorry I missed your call. Your pet knocked out on my hand.” 

Ellie giggles, “It’s cool. How ya been?”

“Fine… She’s a rascal, ain’t she? I found her head first in one of my flower pots. Her tiny legs were wiggling tryna get herself out,” His chuckles are like warm hugs, “How’s work?”

Ellie’s cackles calm, “Also fine… Err…Um… speaking of Pickle…” 

Her dad hums, and Ellie sighs, “Remember when I told you about how I found her?” 

“Yeah… You and that girl found the poor thing freezing to death outside… Why?”

“… Would you believe me if I said we somehow reunited by the grace of God and she’s coming back with me tomorrow?” Ellie squeaks, and her confidence drops when he exhales. It sounds heavy. 

“Um… for what?” 

“To see Pickle…”

“…Alright.”

“What’re you thinkin’,” She nips at her nails. 

“Nothin’…” 

“Dad…” 

“I dunno what you want me to say, darlin’… Everything you’ve told me about her so far wasn’t… great to hear.” 

Ellie rolls onto her back, “Yeah… I dunno. Something’s different about her now.” 

“How so?” 

She can’t tell him how badly your shielded eyes have taken a toll on her. How desperately she wants them to revert to the shining rivers they used to be. How badly her chest ached when you left her room last night, “I dunno. It just is…” She mutters weakly. Another heavy sigh. 

“I mean… You’re an adult. I can’t tell you what to do anymore.” 

“Don’t be like that, please.” 

“Not being like anything. I can only accept.” 

Ellie’s hand drags down her face in exasperation. The rants she relinquished onto her dad about you are making her nauseas. 

“Just… be nice to her, please.” He hums begrudgingly. 

“Dad, I’m serious. I feel like we… could be friends.” 

“Friends… Alright.” He sounds skeptical, but he isn’t combative. She hopes he’ll keep it together when he sees you, “How should I plan for this friend when she gets here?”

Ellie smiles sadly, “Make eggplant parmesan…”

Her dad snorts, “… Since when do you like eggplant?” 

Ellie grins, “I don’t.” 

Why can’t black roses be real? 

Ellie doesn’t seem like a flower girl, but she has a gigantic leaf imprinted on her arm for the rest of her life; She must appreciate the autotroph kingdom. Your mother always told you how fucked it is to enter people’s homes empty handed. Walmart usually pulls through with the awkward housewarming gifts, but they’re slacking in their garden selection today. Fuck your life. 

You’re forced to settle on peonies… They’re pretty and all, but you’d prefer alliums for her. Maybe even a carnation. Plus, Amaya always told you to never buy flowers that sound like penis. 

Amaya… Are you really about to break down in the frozen food section? Maybe. It’s time to go. You're shocked to find out you have more than ten dollars on your card. Fuck hotels, from the depths of your soul. 

You set your purchase in the passenger’s side and pull up Ellie’s pinged location. She left way earlier than you. You would’ve carpooled, but you couldn’t miss these hours for this paycheck. How are you a struggling student and not even in school? 

The drive is going to be long. 

At least you have time to scream out your frustrations. 

“Hey, Siri.” 

… UH HUH?

“Play This Cold Black by Slipknot.” 

PLAYING THIS COLD BLACK BY SLIPKNOT. 

Your head thrashes as you back out of your parking spot. 

“WELCOME HOOO— “

The ride wasn’t long enough, actually. Ellie’s dad’s house is right there. Like… right fucking there, and your voice is almost gone. Clouds are beginning to roll in over the neighborhood. The universe is fucking with you. Great. 

You dump the last bits of water into the thirty-dollar, peony-stuffed vase before exiting your car, backpack strapped over your shoulder. You climb the brick staircase with a pounding heart. 

“Okay,” You croak, “Hi. Nice to meet you, Mr. Miller. I heard my — our cat was with you—“ You rehearse and cringe. Why are you pressing him about a cat in his domain? 

“Fuck, okay, wait,” You try again, “Hi, Mr. Miller, I’m Ellie’s, uh, friend. We were roommates some time ago— “ 

Some time ago? Who the fuck are you? Shakespeare? Emily fucking Brontë? Get a fucking grip. 

You almost drop the fucking vase when the door opens. Your coughs are uncontrollable when you see Ellie, eyes flicking between you and the ring light camera. Why the fuck does she look so good? Cartier watch, black button up and slacks, hair… neat. She’s about to trigger your asthma! 

“Uh… you okay?” She questions flatly. You’re still choking on your own esophagus, but you send her two thumbs up anyway. You’re great! Terrific! Immediately scared shitless when a… big ass man holding a black furball creeps up behind her. He’s not as dolled-up as Ellie and it makes you less insecure. Why the fuck do you have this hoodie on? You should’ve at least worn some trousers! 

“Nice to meet you.” His voice sounds like grovel. Gravel? You can’t fucking think right now! He adjusts Pickle in his grasp so he can extend a polite hand out to you, “I’m Joel. I’m Ellie’s father,” He sounds courteous, but there’s something simmering beneath his pupils as he stares at you. 

His grip is strong when you accept it. You’re going to vomit, “I-I’m — I mean, hi, I’m, uh… Me’n Ellie used to live together—“ You sound like a frog who just learned how to speak. 

“I’ve been told.” He hums.

Meow!

You almost start bawling at your baby’s cry. She's so big now and her coat is so shiny! She’s eating well. Ellie accepts the flowers with dusted cheeks before stepping aside and allowing you entry. You’re instantly hit with the smell of garlic… Can the whole bloodline throw down in the kitchen? 

“Nice home!” You crack and cringe. You cringe so fucking hard. They both say thanks in unison, but her father’s is gruff while Ellie’s is delicate like petals. She can’t stop staring down at the flowers. Joel finally sets Pickle down so he can head back into the kitchen, and she follows him without hesitation. 

She doesn’t remember you. Your heart shatters. 

“Thank you for the flowers,” You hear Ellie say from beside you. You swallow the lump forming in your throat with a smile. “No problem… You look, um, great.” And you smell like heaven. Like clouds before the rain. 

Her face gets redder and she grins behind petals, “Thank you. I got called in today. For… editing and whatnot.”  

You snicker, “Whatnot?” 

“Shut up. C’mon.” You follow her into the kitchen where she sets the vase in the middle of the dining table before waddling towards her dad, who stands over the stove. You stand back and watch as she playfully punches his upper arm while he stirs the simmering pot, cracking jokes amongst themselves while Pickle paws at Ellie’s calf. Your doting smile vanishes at their laughter; What a little happy family. Are you breathing? 

You turn to face the living room and breathe in as deep as you can, eyes glued to their maroon couch. You crack your knuckles and release the wind in your lungs before repeating. 

“You’re okay, it’s okay. You knew what it was before you came,” you whisper to yourself. Ellie mentioned how close her and her dad were way before you got here, so why is the pain in your chest so sharp? 

A hand comes down on your shoulder and you jump, “Sor — fuck, sorry — “

“Are you okay?” Ellie asks, concerned. 

“Yeah! Yeah, I’m fine! Jus’ looking around,” You laugh shakily and note the large paper crane on the TV stand. You point at it, “That’s so cool! Did you make that? I love origami.” 

“No, my dad did— “

Fuck, “Oh— “

“Yeah, um— “

“D-Do you have a restroom?” 

She observes with worry, “… Yeah, right down that hall, to the left— “

“Thank you, BRB,” You’re practically running to the fucking bathroom. The door closes and locks and you pace. They have a nice shower curtain: black and white stripes. You count them all from top to bottom. 

“Your dad’s dead, fucking relax, it’s been like that, it’s been like that,” You exhale shakily, tremors building in your hands, “You’re fine, you’re fine, calm the fuck down.” You unzip your hoodie and ball it up before shoving your face in it. Your screams into it are muffled. 

You come up for air and stare into the mirror, “You’re fucking fine. The food smells good as fuck and you’re gonna eat and you’re fine.” You open the door and… kitty’s staring at you. She’s sitting pretty and inspecting your disheveled appearance. 

“Hi, baby. Remember me?” You squat and stick your hand out to her. She sniffs curiously before nipping at your pinky. “Ow,” you coo with a smile. 

“She remembers you.” 

Ellie’s leaning against the wall with her arms folded over her chest. You need her to stomp the fuck out of you with affection; She looks so fucking good, fuck—

“I hope,” you squeak and cough. It scares the shit out of Pickle and she runs. 

Ellie’s gaze lingers on your bare arms. “Can we talk for a sec?”

“Yup.” Sound casual, you think. You sprinkle a shrug in there. She nods before heading down the hall and entering the last door. You can’t hide your shocked expression at the scenery. 

Every inch of the room is covered in posters, most of them about galaxies and all their intricacies. There’s a red racecar bed covered in Regular Show sheets and pillowcases and a bunch of stuffed animals, dresser covered with discarded sticker papers and seemingly empty polaroid cameras. There are fairy lights dangling from the ceiling before coming down and around the bed frame, across the closet, and finally slung over her dresser. There’s little action figures and trinkets everywhere. 

The door closes behind you, “… Is this your room?” 

Ellie snorts, “It was. Not anymore.” 

You laugh, “I’m fuckin’ with it. That bed is crazy, though.” Ellie joins in, scratching at her ear. She takes a few steps until she’s in front of you, still at a distance. Thank God; Any closer and your celibacy goes down the drain. 

“Sorry I only brought flowers. I would’ve brought fucking… cake or something if I knew y’all were gonna cook.” Ellie waves you off. 

“The flowers were pretty. Thank you.” 

Your entire face is on fire, “Y’know what I mean…” You cough. 

“Um… I just wanted to talk to you about something. About my dad.” 

There’s a hole in your chest that’s expanding. She takes your silence as attentive, “He can be really overprotective… like, he’s kinda stubborn.”

“Oh… I see where you get it from,” You laugh weakly, clearing your throat when Ellie doesn’t. “Sorry.” You mumble. Ellie looks down at her feet, “Does he not… like me?” You ask quietly, embarrassed out of your fucking mind. 

“It’s not that, he’s just… I told him a little of what happened between us. Not everything, just some of it!” 

“The… bad part, I’m assuming?” Her silence is enough confirmation. 

Ellie looks like Pickle when she’s guilty. You remember when she hopped onto the counter and knocked over your water cup, eyes large and pleading for forgiveness over the mess she caused. 

“M’not mad,” You mumble, “I probably would’ve done the same thing.” Probably is used very strongly. 

“I’m sorr— “

“It’s okay— “

A knock comes from the other side of the door. 

“Come eat, you two!” 

“Coming!” Ellie yells back before rubbing her hands together. “I’m really— “ 

“Ellie, it’s fine,” You reassure her with a light slap on her bicep… It’s quite hard. “C’mon, uh… I’m hungry?” You brush past her and head towards the door, holding it open for her. “After you?”

Ellie reminds you of a strawberry milk squishmallow when she eases past you, trying to hide her smile and pink cheeks. Your cheeks puff as you release the air in your lungs, shutting her door behind you. 

This is the best eggplant parmesan you’ve ever tasted in your goddamn life. Too bad you can’t enjoy it due to Ellie’s hardcore mobster dad sending you deadly glares from across the table. He hasn’t said a word this entire meal, and you’re not anticipating the minute he does. He’s going to blow a gasket. 

“D’you like it?” Ellie says lowly from beside you. You nod your head with two thumbs up. You can’t hide your smile when you notice all the gooey cheese and noodles eaten off the pieces of eggplant. 

“It’s delicious. Thanks Mr. Miller.” 

“Don’t mention it.” He sounds like he means it. Your heart drops and Ellie scowls at him. Your fingers clench around your fork and you scarf down what you can. It’s so good and you’re so scared and you want this meal to be over. 

You're the last to clean your plate so you stand in a rush, gathering all of the plates and spoons off the table before scurrying to the sink. 

Ellie pads close behind you, “Oh, you don’t have to— “

You cut Ellie off with a nervous laugh, “The least I could do.” The dishes clatter and you grab a sudsy sponge. You waste no time, scrubbing the living hell out of these dishes. 

“Go sit down, Ellie.” 

The hairs on the back of your neck stand at his stern tone, “Wha— “

He slices through her refute, and still manages to sound calm, “Go.” 

You continue to scrub, sighing at Ellie's descending stomps. Joel creeps into the open space in front of the sink, grabbing a dish and another sponge. 

“Ellie told me you’re an artist.” He mutters over the running water.

“Yeah. Sorta.” You reply as calmly as you can. 

“What are your intentions with my daughter?” He gets right to it, it seems. You scrub harder. 

“Just… tryna make things right between us.” 

“Why's that?” 

Word vomit. You can’t help yourself. You’re so fucking nervous. “I-I fuc — sorry — I screwed over someone that was… really great. Your daughter’s a sweetheart and I feel awful with how things left off.” You stumble with a heated face. You catch the arch in his eyebrow and back pedal, “Not like we were — we weren’t dating or anything! Like, not like that! We just — “

“I was a student once upon a time. I know how these things go.” He snickers humorlessly. Your shoulders relax a smidge before he asks, “Why now?” 

“Hm?” 

“Why’d you wait so long to talk to her? The two of you graduated forever ago.” His tone is much calmer than it was seconds ago, but anxiety surges in your gut at his questioning. 

“I didn’t wanna reach out without being in the right headspace. I had… a lot going on and I had to handle it. Therapy’s hard as fu — heck,” You sigh, “I still don’t think I’m doin’ a good job, but… I dunno, it earned me a Michelin star eggplant parm. Must be doing something right.” 

You don’t expect Joel to laugh, but he does. It’s hearty and deep. Very dad-esque. Your heart crushes to dust all over again. 

“Look, kid,” Joel sets the clean plate in the rack before grabbing another, “I wasn’t gonna say much, but Ellie seems to like you… a lot. More than most people.” Your heart flurries back into shape at his observation. You want to ask what a lot means exactly, but he continues. 

“She’s… she gets very attached to people. I know it’s hard to believe but she’s very… sensitive,” His voice is low, but he’s not bullshitting in the slightest. The protective aura has returned and it’s radiating back onto you, pushing you back. Keeping you at a distance from him. From Ellie, “I’m never gonna shit on anyone’s journey, but frankly… if you’re not here to stay, I’d suggest leaving her alone now.”

This is definitely a threat. But you don’t feel threatened. You feel… sad. Joel is doing what any great dad would when faced with an outsider: armoring his cubs by any means. Something you’ve never experienced. If meeting Joel has shown you anything, it’s been what you’ve missed out on your entire life. Little does he know the last thing you want to do is separate from Ellie a second time. Another breakdown is bound to crash into you very soon. You forgot where the bathroom was. 

You’re not going anywhere. Your heart won’t allow it. “I’m— “

You’re interrupted by a loud rumble, instantly followed by the heavy droplets of pouring rain. It sounds like pebbles are being thrown at all windows of their home; Is it hailing? 

“Holy shit,” Ellie calls from the living room window, “Was it supposed to storm tonight?” 

“Yeah, it was on the news,” Joel confirms. Ellie rushes over and points her eyes to you. 

“You’re not driving in that.” She breathes out. Your heart fist pumps, but you maintain nonchalance. 

You shrug awkwardly, “I don’t wanna pry— “ 

“Nah, she’s right. We have a guest room.” Joel sighs, “Ellie, show her where it is. I’ll finish up in here.” 

Ellie’s hand closes around your wrist before guiding you down the hall. The bathroom’s right across from the guest room. On the left side, you note. 

“Fuck a guest room. You’re staying with me.” She mumbles and opens the cupboard. She grabs you some sleep shorts and presumably her father’s sweatshirts. You try to convince yourself that the strong pounds in your chest are from fear of the storm, and not at all from a lesbian slumber party. 

… Fuck. 

The storm is roaring outside. And Ellie’s chiefing in neon astronaut jammies. This feels like a fever dream. 

“They glow in the dark.” Ellie hums around a cloud of smoke from where she sits across from you on the bed. You pause your gawking, “Huh?”

“My pjs glow in the dark. Wanna see?” Her eyes sparkle and your heart sprouts legs and sprints around in your ribcage. 

“Fuck yeah.” You gasp. Ellie’s teeth shine before she puts her joint between her lips and leans across her bed to shut her lamp off. Every fiber of your being tries to not lock onto the smidge of skin that appears from under her sweatshirt when she stretches. The room goes dark around the neon pink and green outlines of the design. You choke out a laugh at the pigmentation; How the fuck are they so bright!

“Sorry if this is boring. I’ve never had a sleepover before.” 

“Shut up, that’s cool as fuck! You gotta battery pack in there or somethin’?” Ellie giggles out a no. A smile stretches wide across your face when you look up at her, hers just as bright. “Are you sleepy?” You ask. 

“Not at all,” she hums as she switches the lamp back on. 

“We could play a gaaame,” You suggest sing-songy. 

“Oh, fuck. Like what.” Ellie huffs a laugh. 

“Truth or dare is a sleepover classic— “

“I’m not licking a toilet seat.” Ellie states flatly. Laughter explodes from you at her face. “I’m not a crazy dare-er like that. The most you’ll have to do is prank call an ex or some shit.” 

“I don’t have an ex.” 

“Oh… Well, a family member.” Ellie nods in acceptance. “Can I ask first?” She asks. 

“Mhm. Lay it on me.” 

“Truth or dare?” 

“Dare.” 

“Show me what’s in your backpack.” 

“…Fuck.” You sigh, and Ellie cackles. “Were you planning this shit?” You ask and stand, walking over to the dresser where your bag sits. You grab it and hand it to her. She wastes no time, stubbing her joint out before rummaging through your shit, sifting through loose-leaf paper and markers used for coloring. You plop down onto her bed and she pulls out your sketchbook. 

“Is it okay if I look?” 

“I dunno,” You smirk, “Can I finally see your fucking portfolio?” 

“Come home with me tomorrow,” she says instantaneously, “It’s there. You can see it.” 

“… Then yes.” 

She flips through pages and pages of visuals you’ve created before your father’s passing. They range from sloppily scribbled orchids, to immaculately shaded depictions of eggplant farms. Ellie giggles when she finds a small comic of Pickle playing with her favorite mouse toy. 

“She still has it.”

“Good,” you whisper. You watch as she studies each page to her heart’s content, fingers dragging across lines that catch her attention. “You’re so good,” she says softly, awestruck and eyes sincere. Your gaze drops to your lap. 

“Thanks,” you match her volume. She hums and flips to the next page. You eye the ashtray on her bed before snagging it, snatching her lighter and igniting the joint. Ellie eyes you like a hawk. 

“I watched a tutorial on how to become a professional pothead… I think I got it down.” 

“Show me.” She whispers and your stomach jolts.

Smoke leaves the lit end of the J and you flick the lighter off. You bring it to your lips and puff your cheeks full of smoke, inhaling as deep as you can before your lungs squeeze. You cough and heave tearfully and Ellie leans in to rub your back. 

“That was better.” She says softly. “I was gonna dare you to hit it anyway.” Your coughing fits calm and you swallow. 

“Shit,” You say. Ellie takes the joint from you and hits it like a fucking pro. She's much closer than she was seconds ago. You examine how her lips curl around the roach, cheeks expanding around carbon before inhaling, allowing the remainder to leave in a bunch of circles. 

“You really blowing O’s right now?” You think you hit it right this time. The jitters you’ve had all day are beginning to dwindle. 

She smiles mischievously, “Mhm.” 

“Truth or dare?” You mumble.

“… Truth.” 

“Did you think about me… after you left?” If you were to lean forward an inch, Ellie’s nose would touch yours. Nose hug. Her face spots are so adorable. 

“Yeah. A lot.” She passes the J back to you and you accept it boldly. You’re releasing your stress with every exhale. Ellie was right; Smoking does feel good. 

“What’d you think about?” 

“Isn’t it my turn?” 

“No.” You smile. 

She shrugs, “I dunno. Just…” Her gaze falls onto her stuffed tabby cat. 

“I feel like you’re boutta say something nasty.” You snicker. 

“Wha — no! The fuck— “

You mock her, rubbing all over yourself, “I thought about your hands, ooo, aaa— “

Ellie smacks your arm a bunch of times before pushing you back onto the bed. You’re howling laughter over her whining, “Bitch, that’s you! Don’t think I forgot about that shit you pulled in the car!”

“You have nice hands! What can I say,” You slur with a dumb grin, “You have, like… classic lesbian hands. All you need is some Hot Topic rings and all the hoes gon’ flock to you.” You take one last toke before the lit end can reach your fingers, stubbing it on the ashtray. 

Ellie seemingly ponders with the theory, “… Is that why a milf ate me out at the club?” 

Your neck almost snaps when it cranes to look at her, “What the fuc— “

“Yeah. Craziest experience I ever had. Like, in my life.” 

“Fuck, Ellie…” Your head flops back onto her Lightning McQueen blankets. “Was it good?” 

“I… I guess. I came.” 

You stare at the star stickers on her ceiling. “You guess?” She only hums. 

“But…”

“Hm?” You urge her to continue. 

“She didn’t… kiss me.” She whispers like it’s dirty to say out loud. You slowly blink at the opaque walls. “I mean, she did, but it wasn’t a real one.” 

“Shame on her.” 

Ellie maneuvers so she’s lying on her back beside you. “Yeah…” 

“Ellie?” 

“Hm?”

“Were you a virgin before I touched you?” 

You expect her to slap the shit out of you again, but she doesn’t. She takes one deep breath before muttering, “Yes.” 

You stop yourself from melting into her bed, turning on your side and propping yourself up on an elbow, gazing down at her. Her eyes are wide as saucers as she looks up at you. You can see her fingers twitching around her pillow, squeezing the fabric of the case. Right on Rigby’s nose. 

“A-Are we still playing truth or dare?” She whispers, her breath hitting your face. She smells like oranges. You shake your head, tongue rolling over your lips. “No.” Your free hand lands on her hip and squeezes. Her jaw slacks around a gasp.

“… Oh.”

“Oh?” You want — need to kiss her so badly. Steal all the oxygen from her lungs so that she has no other choice but to breathe from you. Only you. Your vision is hazy with each travel over her face. She looks so soft, so pliant, so ready and prepared for you to take from her. Just like you hoped. 

Your hand travels, pushing her sweatshirt up just above the waistline of her pants, fiddling with the knot right under her bellybutton. 

You pull at the string until it loosens, “She gave you head?” 

“T-The milf?” 

“Yeah. The milf.” Aggravation seeps through your tone. Ellie’s hips twitch. 

“… Yeah?” She coughs. You hum and hook your thumb under the band and inch them down. They aren’t even off all the way and you can tell she’s naked underneath. 

“How good was it?” 

“I don’t… know?” 

“Yeah you do. How good was it?” You snip, and Ellie winces. “I-I squirted.” She trips over her words and your clit jumps. You don’t say anything, and she seems sad. 

“… Are you mad at me?” 

“No.” Your tone says otherwise. You’re not mad. You don’t know what you are. You don’t like what she’s telling you, though. Fuck milfs… You love them with your entire heart, but fuck them. 

… Yeah. You’re high as shit. 

You sit up and she moves to follow you, but you push her down and she goes limp under your touch. 

“Don’t move. Just lay there.” 

She pouts and you almost kiss it, “Don’t be mad.” 

“I told you I’m not.” You swing a leg over her waist and she sighs dreamily. “How many times did you come.” You’re not asking; She’s going to tell you. You raise her sweatshirt up over her breasts. 

“T-Two — Two.” She moves to throw her sweatshirt over her head but you snatch her wrists, pinning them right on the cushiony mattress. She doesn’t fight you. 

“I want you quiet. Your dad’ll kill me if he hears you.”

Her eyes go glossy and twinkle, “Okay— “ 

“I mean it. Don’t say shit.” 

“M’not gonna,” She whines before her mouth clamps shut. You give her overlapped wrists one last threatening squeeze, watching her fingers go lax before releasing her. You cup her tits and her eyes flutter shut, teeth sinking into her lower lip. You mouth at the valley between her tits and her back arches to follow each swipe of your tongue. 

You kiss all over her ribcage, almost feeling each erratic thump of her heart under your tongue. She keens when your tongue flicks over the rising bud of her nipple, thighs squeezing around your hips. Your mouth latches onto the skin right above her areola, teeth sinking into it before sucking. Her hips raise and she’s breathing like she’s about to faint, and you grin like a fox. 

You don’t let up until a wet maroon mark is left on her tit before swiftly switching to the next one, leaving a much harsher spot on the raised skin. An eager hand scratches down her torso until it brushes the patch of hair that peeks out from under her pants. 

You shove your hand beneath the light cloth and your fingers are drenched in seconds. Your walls squeeze around nothing when you feel her clit jump in excitement. Her squishy lips spread around your middle and index fingers, her throbbing bundle of nerves cinched between them. She keeps making fucking noise and the walls seem to shake. 

“What’d I say.”

“I — m’sorry, can’t h-help i— “

“Be quiet, Ellie.” Your fingers slip over her messy clit in slow, teasing circles. You release her skin until it’s blistering and bruised, quickening the pace of your fingers and she pulses in your hand. Your tongue swirls around her nipple once more, cheeks hollowing when you suckle. 

Your eyes search for hers but her head is thrown back, neck strained and veins popping from beneath her skin. Your lips release the skin and your drippy hand leaves her pants. Your nipples harden under your tee when she reaches for your retreating form, fingers digging into your sweats. 

Her pants are yanked down and tossed across the room, her toes curling in her rainbow-striped socks when your hands hook under her knees to push them up to her chest. Her arms entangle under her bent legs to hold them out of your way. 

“I could fuck you right now with no problems.” You exhale in a daze, “S’fucking drippin’.” You envision how good her pussy will swallow whatever pops in, how easy it’ll stretch around something thick—

Ellie’s eyes shine like you offered her candy and her hole clamps down hard. You chuckle. “You want that?” 

Her head bounces off the pillow in rushed nods. If your mouth wasn’t so fucking dry, you’d be slobbering all over her pussy. “Remember what I said?” You remind her, and she plants a heavy hand over her mouth. You kiss her ankle in appreciation. 

Your fingers move on autopilot, massaging her clit a few more times before inching down, your index pushing past the tight, gripping muscles. Your finger’s swallowed whole in an instant and Ellie’s trying her hardest to mask her squeaks. “Fuck me,” you sigh when she takes another finger with no hassle, walls engulfing your digits in wetness. Her scent is surrounding you and it’s intoxicating. 

“Missed you s’bad— “

“Missed you more, baby. Missed this pussy,” You’re pussydrunk and you’re slipping. That spot in her cunt becomes plumper with each press of your fingertips, “She fucked you better than me?” 

Ellie’s denial is convincing, but that sick part of your brain doesn’t believe her. She loved being touched by someone, wanted by someone. Someone who wasn’t you, and you’re livid, “Nooo— “

You slice through her whine, “No?” Your smile is sadistic and your fingers are relentless, “You said her name like you said mine?” You grit and her eyes cycle into her skull, her hair sticking to her forehead. She’s trying to keep her voice down when she whispers how she only thought about you when she made a mess. She wanted you there, she says, she needed you there to take care of her. 

“Y’fuck me s’good, fuck— “

Your eyes are dead, “I’ll hurt you. Be quiet.” 

Fear flashes beneath her desire and she listens, keeping her sobs to a minimum. The sloppy, wet sounds of her pussy overtake the entire room the harder you fuck in, her nails tearing into her Pikachu stuffie on the corner of her bed. A string of drool dribbles from her bottom lip to her sweatshirt, her eyes glowing under the dimly lit lamp. 

Her walls shake and throb on you, “Gonna cum, baby?” You grin manically at her dumbed-out expression, cheeks wet and eyes droopy. You coo at her and force in as deep as you can, curling your fingers up, fighting against the tight contractions of her walls. 

“Make a mess on me, baby, I gotchu, c’mon— “

A long, drawn-out moan escapes Ellie’s lips, and you’re so hypnotized by the heavy spray of juices that lands on your thigh that you don’t even bother to shut her up. She’s drenching her sheets and blankets and you and it’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen. You’re fucking wave after wave out of her and she’s practically riding your hand, groaned curses and dazed squeaks of your name bouncing off the walls. 

It feels like minutes pass when her orgasm slows, inner thighs drenched and dripping with slickness. Ellie’s entire body shakes and her thighs squeeze around your hand as she attempts to catch her breath, but you’re not done. You’re not satisfied. She didn’t give you enough. 

You climb onto her and your lips connect in a simmering kiss, her wet mouth smacking against yours. Her cold hands land on either of your cheeks and your hips roll downward on hers. She whines into your mouth and tries to meet your hips but you force them back onto the mattress. She yanks at your shirt in attempts to rip it off but you don’t let up, lips slipping down to connect with her neck. 

Your wrist twists downward until you're met with her sticky bush once more, spreading her lips apart and shoving your fingers back inside her. She chokes a wet gasp when they hit right where she needs, her arms wrapping around the back of your neck to hold you close. You’re babbling nonsense in her ear as you work her, telling her how she’s stuck with you, how you’re never leaving her side again, demanding that she says you're the best she’s ever had. And she does, and either you’re fucked out of your mind, or she means it. 

You barely catch how your hips move like you're fucking her, driving into her as hard as you can and she takes it, stretches her legs wider so you can reach the spots she’s never been able to on her own. She’s saying your name like a prayer, like it’s all she’s ever known, and it’s breaking you down, only to build you back up so you can crash back into her. You missed her so fucking bad and you’re unleashing all of your feelings on her body and she eats all of it. How could you leave her when she fucking needs you this badly? You’ll never forgive yourself. 

She’s warning you, crying about how you’re going to make her squirt again, begging you to slow down because she can’t take what you’re giving her, but you feel so good and you know she does, too. You can’t stop even if you want to. You want to drain her, live inside her for the rest of your days on Earth. You’re forcing space for you inside her.

Her nails dig into your shoulders as she cums. She’s unapologetically loud and it flows directly in your ear, and your own noises leave your mouth and land onto the clammy skin of her throat. The jets of fluid that leave her are stronger than the last, and you laugh. Laugh in ecstasy and joy and pleasure that you can’t even feel, but it’s there. Right in your chest. 

You’re not done. You’ll never be done with her. 

The night evaporates with you in between her legs, slurping every bit of cum and stress that you may have caused since knowing her from the source until the sun shines through her blinds, drinking from her like you’ll die without her taste on your tongue. She lets you do whatever you need to feel satiated, but it’ll never be enough now. 

You’ll never be done with her. 

Ellie’s naked form jolts awake when ticklish breaths hit her shoulder. 

You’re beneath her, slumped, pantsless legs entangling hers and arms twisted every which way as you slobber and snore. A smile grows on Ellie’s face at your peaceful expression; She’s never slept that good in her own bed. She doesn’t want to wake you, but she has to pee so fucking badly. 

She shifts in her position and instantly cringes at the soreness in her legs. Warmth coats the crests of her cheeks when she sees the discarded sheets and pillowcases that were changed only hours ago on the floor, head plopping onto your shoulder to hide in your neck. Your snoring gets cut by a guttural cough and Ellie laughs to herself when your snores pick up again. 

She’s not a morning person in the slightest, so why the fuck is she so happy? Is this the post-sex glow that her friends always tell her about? Is she still considered a virgin if you only used your fingers and tongue? She doesn't feel like one… Sex rules are fucking dumb. She stops stressing before she ruins her morning. 

The pangs in her bladder are getting on her nerves; She wants to cuddle. She sighs and shifts on top of you, trying her hardest not to disrupt your deep slumber. She manages to separate and clothe herself before waddling down the hall and into the bathroom, trying to ignore the aches in her thighs. You wrecked her shit… What the hell. 

The second she leaves the bathroom, she smells coffee. Her dad’s up. She might vomit. 

The two of you weren’t that loud. Definitely not. He couldn’t have heard. He didn’t hear! Ellie’s stealthy as she tiptoes through the hall… until the fucking floorboards croak from beneath her and she nearly faints. 

“Come out, dipshit. I know it’s you.” 

Her eyes squeeze shut and she curses to herself. She reluctantly appears from behind the wall, her dad sitting comfortably on the couch with a filled mug and newspaper, Pickle napping on his lap. He peeks from above his reading glasses. 

“Think we needa talk.” 

“… Fuck me.” She whispers before shamefully limping into the living room. She flops onto the couch and glues her eyes onto the decorative rugs under the coffee table. 

“She seems nice.” Her dad sips his mug. Ellie’s face burns. 

“She is.” She mumbles. You took such good care of her after last night. You got her in the shower, brushed her teeth for her when she was damn near sleepwalking, watched her down two bottles of water. Her heart flutters at how soft your eyes turned when you kissed her to sleep. 

“Is she your girlfriend?” 

“… I dunno.” He hums and sips. 

She doesn’t know. You’re not dating, but Ellie thinks you like her… She thinks. She likes you… a lot. She bites at her nails. 

“You like her?” He asks lowly; She knows he knows. 

“Yeah…” Ellie whispers, cheeks rising on their own. She covers her face when he smiles. 

“Just… take your time.” Joel advises gently, “Did she tell you she’s in therapy?” 

Ellie’s ears perk and her brows furrow, “No.” She sits up. Her dad’s gaze softens, “Wait til she brings it up, then. Y’all should talk before things get serious. It’s only been a couple days.” 

Ellie knows her dad is right, but it’s hard to control herself when she’s around you. She naturally gravitates towards your aura; It’s comforting and she doesn’t want to lose it again. 

A gentle clatter comes from her bedroom and she stands. You’re awake. 

“I love you, kiddo,” Joel says, and she smiles softly. “Love you, too.” 

She scurries down the hallway and enters her bedroom, seeing you sprawled out on the floor, all wrapped in sheets. 

Your eyes are droopy when you croak, “Hello.” Ellie snickers. 

“Hi. What happened.” 

“I was reaching for, like… an orb in my dream and I guess I did it in real life,” Your voice gets so raspy in the morning, and it tickles her ears. Ellie can’t stop laughing. She helps you stand before kissing your cheek. 

“Good morning,” she wraps her arms around your neck. 

“M-Mornin’,” You squeak, eyes flitting around, “Uh… How'd you sleep?” 

“Good.” She’s lost in your brown eyes. They’re warm like the sun. Why won’t you look at her? 

She follows your line of vision down to your fiddling hands before whispering, “You okay?” You simply nod. Ellie’s heart stutters nervously. 

“Do you still wanna come over later?” 

“… Yeah.” Your attempts to disguise your stiffness fail. Ellie feels a lump forming in her throat when she detaches from you, and you search for the new pair of pants she gave you before you went to bed. Ellie watches silently, crestfallen. Something she did triggered your aloofness, so she turns to leave the room.

Her voice cracks, “I’m gonna… shower again— “

“Ellie.” 

She turns, “Yes?” 

Her fists clench when you walk until you’re standing in front of her, warm hand coming up to hold her cheek before kissing her. It’s soft and makes Ellie’s fingers thrum with excitement. It only lasts seconds before you pull away, and Ellie chases your mouth.  

“I’d love to come over. I think we… should talk about some things.” You say quietly, and Ellie silently agrees. You let her go and she wants nothing but for you to pull her in once more, shrouded in your warmth. 

You’re making her bed when Ellie leaves for the bathroom, body falling against the door to calm herself down. You’re not upset with her, and you want to come over… to talk, whatever that means.

The hot water burns her skin; She spends her entire shower thinking about how she can make you as happy as she feels. 

taggiessssss :3 @dyk3ang3l @ellieloml @inf3ct3dd @fromminaa @womenofarcane @sawaagyapong @mina-281 @aouiaa @bbglmfao @i00rii @sakiigami @starologist @southelroys @diddiqueen @trackinglessons @ellieswhorcrux @villainousbear @p4ison1vy @tohoko @yuckyfucky @dollyfleurs @elsbunny222 @sevsbimbo @amiorca @alittlextrahoney @gato-chino @topiatwin @r3wbeef @elliesatchel @muthafuckingstargirl @callmewhenyoukan @macaroni676 @draculurasblog @ellieaesp @@gravygranules @elsblunt

[gallavichsreddie1128]

Pregnant with Patrick’s Daughter (Challengers)

Description: Y/N is pregnant with Patrick’s baby but she’s with Art.

Word Count:986

Request: "Maybe something with a pregnant reader and like Patrick’s the dad. It could be fluff or angst, idk I’m just curious to see how the dynamic between Patrick and like his child would be lol!”

Author’s note: I added a twist in it. Hope you like it!

Y/N looked down at the pregnancy test in shock. Her and Patrick used protection or did they? She honestly couldn’t remember but this was bad news. She was with Art and fucking Patrick. Though she knows that it’s not Art’s kid because he’s been too busy with Tennis to even fuck her. Art would know that the kid wasn’t his, especially if the kid looks like Patrick. Truth be told, Y/N loved Patrick and she also loved Art. It was hard for her to choose between them when they both wanted her as well. She looked at the engagement ring that was placed on her finger. She twirled it and played with it as she thought of what she was going to do. 

Art was practicing for his match today so Y/N called Patrick. The two weren’t friends anymore which made the situation worse. He thought she wanted to have sex again so he kissed her hard as soon as she opened the door. She pushed him back and he gave her a confused look. “We need to talk.” She said, he nodded and followed her to the kitchen. “Take a seat.” She demanded. “Ohh I love it when you get all dominant with me.” He smirked. She gave him a look and his smirk dropped. “Listen I don’t know what to do about this or why I'm even telling you at this point but I’m pregnant.” His jaw drops at her words, “And it’s yours because Art and I haven’t had sex in awhile.” He got up from the chair and pulled her in for a hug. “That’s great. I’m gonna be a dad.” He whispered. She pulled away from the hug, “Patrick, I’m with Art. He’s not gonna be happy about this.” Patrick didn’t really care. He hated Art for taking Y/N from him. That pathetic bastard got everything he wanted. “Well he’s not gonna wanna be with you since you’re carrying another man’s baby. My baby to be exact.” She glared at him. Of course he’d be happy about this. He hated Art. 

“What?” Art screeched as he stood up from the couch. It didn’t make sense why Patrick was here but now it did. “Art, I’m sorry this isn’t how I wanted you to find out.” She tells him. Patrick had a proud smirk on his face. “Found out what? That you’re fucking my ex best friend and having his baby?” Y/N looked at him with a guilty expression. She really did feel bad. “Art it’s hard for me.” She said with tears in her eyes. “You’re crying? You’re fucking my ex best friend and you’re crying?” He yelled. “Art, I love you both.” Patrick didn’t know that she loved him, nor did Art. “What?” Patrick whispered at her confession. “I love you both and I know that you guys hate each other but I can’t live without you guys.” She said, tears still streaming down her face. Patrick stood up and looked at Art who looked so broken at the news. Y/N’s eyes flickered between the two of them. “Art, please say something.” She begged her fiance. He shook his head and laughed. Both, Y/N and Patrick looked confused. “Get the fuck out!” He told them. “Art, please-” “Get the fuck out!” He screamed at her. 

She laid in Patrick’s bed with tears streaming down her face. Her belly bigger and full with Patrick’s baby. It’s been 6 months since Art kicked her out. He hadn’t spoken to either of them, not that she thought he would. He had the right to be upset with her. She cheated on him and got pregnant. But it still hurt her a lot, she loved them both and it was selfish that she felt sad because she had Patrick. But she wanted both. The front door opened and she quickly wiped her tears. Patrick made his way to the bedroom to see Y/N and her tummy full of his baby. He smiled at the sight. She saw him enter the bedroom and smiled at him. He came and collapsed on the bed next to her. He turned towards her and stared at her stomach. ���I can’t wait til she’s born.” He said and placed his hand on her tummy. She smiled and agreed with him. She placed her hand on his and the baby kicked. They both gasped and looked at each other. This was the first time they baby kicked for Patrick. Tears started forming in his eyes as he smiled. “I finally felt her kick.” Y/N nodded and ran her fingers through his hair. 

Y/N watched as Patrick gave their 4 year old daughter a racket. She chuckled as their daughter kept dropping it but everytime Patrick gave her it again. He was so patient with her and so sweet. It made Y/N’s heart melt. She giggled as their daughter almost hit Patrick with the racket. He looked at his wife and smiled at her. She got up from her seat and walked over to them. “Try not to kill daddy, sweetheart.” She joked. Their 4 year old giggled and gave the racket to Y/N. Y/N took it and melted when she ran into Patrick’s arms. Patrick smiled and hugged her back. Y/N felt happiness in her life, ever since their daughter was born. She didn’t think of Art anymore, unless she saw him on the news. He was a pro tennis player like Patrick and he married Tashi Duncan. She was happy for him, truly. “Hey uh I guess now would be the time to tell you that I’m playing in the challengers and Art will be there.” Her smile dropped at his name. She had a bad feeling about this and almost told him not to go. But she would be by his side with their daughter to support him. She wouldn’t let Art being there ruin this for them.

[throneofsmut]

Hi! Could I request a Cassian x shy reader fic where they’re going back and forth sharing their links with one another?

You Only Have To Ask

Cassian x Reader || WC: 2.1k || Warnings: sparring and light smut.

****

Cassian and you were currently laying on the floor of the training rings on the House of Winds rooftop—chests heaving after sparring for hours—Cassian wearing a lopsided grin.

“Cauldron boil me, I never should’ve agreed to do this,” you groaned in between pants.

The General of the Night Court huffed a laugh before he turned his head to look at you. Hands behind your head, chest heaving, legs bent, hair messy and a sheen of sweat making you almost glow in the light of setting sun. You were beautiful.

Cassian and you had met almost six months ago at Rita’s after Feyre had finally convinced you to go out with the Inner Circle.

Your older brother and his mate owned the bookstore that was part cafe and part flower shop, right next to her art studio. And they had recently welcomed a baby, their first, and asked if you could run the bookstore for a while.

Most of their customers knew who you were, but more than a few didn’t. And to your mortification, you would have to explain to them who you were and why you were running the place for the time being.

You were still wringing your hands, face still embarrassingly red, after explaining to a rude customer that you weren't sure when your brother would return, when Feyre came in asking about them.

“Hello,” she looked around the shop, no doubt looking for your brother or his mate, “Is Flynn not in today? I haven’t seen him in a couple of days or Sera.”

You went to answer and to your chargin, you stuttered. Violently, if that was even a way to describe it, but to be completely honest it was the only way to describe it. Never in your life have you stuttered so badly.

In your defense, a new book was released so there was an influx of customers. Regulars and new, and you have always been shy towards everyone—except your brother and his mate—especially strangers.

Feyre gave you a patient look, letting out a shaky breath you opened your mouth to tell her about your brother and his mate, when he walked in. “Hey, bub, how’s business?” His voice booming through the small shop.

You visibly sagged in relief, “Thank the Mother’s tits.”

Flynn only laughed, “Oh, come on. It can’t be that bad, bub,” he teased.

The shop was closing in thirty minutes, so you told him he could close since you’d embarrassed yourself enough for him today. He gave you an apologetic smile and chuckled, “Fair enough. We appreciate you,” he said sincerely.

You gave him a small smile and nodded your head, giving Feyre the same smile and a little wave goodbye and made your way towards the door. You were almost free, when Feyre, started calling out for you. “Y/N! Y/N! Y/N!”

Turning around, eyes wide. “Wait, I need to ask you something!”

“Uhm, all right?”

“Flynn, told me that your grandfather was Illyrian and that he made sure to train your mother to fight and to train you both too. But, he also said that he taught you different fighting styles.”

You shifted from one foot to the other, “Yeah, what about it?”

“Well, I was wondering if you could come and train with us at the House of Wind. I would love to see—“

You rubbed the back of your neck, nervously. “Us?”

“Yeah, if you don’t mind. It would be Rhys, Cass, Az, Mor and me.” She explained, she looked so excited.

She wanted you to train with the Inner Circle. You. “Uhm, yeah. Sure, I guess.”

She pulled you into a bone crushing hug, “Thank the cauldron!” When she realized what she was doing she pulled away, “Sorry. Sorry. We’re all going out to Rita’s tonight, meet us there so you can get to know everyone.”

You nodded your head hesitantly, but agreed nonetheless.

As soon as you walked into Rita’s Feyre rushed to greet you and everyone was so welcoming and nice. And you're pretty sure Flynn had told Feyre about how shy you were and she had probably told the rest of the Inner Circle too. Not that you minded because it’s just who you are, you were always anxious around new people and in new places and got easily flustered or overwhelmed.

Yet, fighting had come naturally to you. Flynn always said he could never understand that part of you, how you were so introverted, but fought in the fighting pits in the Illyrian Camps.

You don’t know how you did it either, you just did.

So when Rhys flew you up to the House of Wind the next day and you sparred with everyone they were all impressed to say the least. You had all agreed that you would spar with everyone until one of you got the other to tap. You got Feyre to tap in 30 seconds, Mor in two minutes, Rhys in seven, Az in ten and Cassian in twelve.

You had gotten the Lord of Bloodshed on the ground and you wrestled a bit before he tapped. Standing up first and when you had looked down at him, offering him your hand to help him up, the bond snapped into place.

For the both of you.

And you turned the same shade of red as the siphons atop his hands when he just stared at you. After it first happened you were in shock and were thinking about rejecting it, because you were scared to say the least, but he gave you space to think.

Flynn told you that you were blessed by the Mother for having found your mate and he was right, but you were just so hesitant. You didn’t even know the male and he was your mate. Unbeknownst to you he had immediately felt your feelings flow through the mating bond and swore to himself to patiently court you.

He would take things slow and at your own pace.

Which was how you’d gotten into sparring dates. You’d both felt more comfortable in the fighting ring so you made a bargain. You’d spar on the roof of the House of Wind while asking each other simple questions to get to know each other and then you’d talk about more intimate things after.

Your mate had gone quiet, turning to face him, you saw he was staring at you unabashedly and you blushed. It didn’t matter that it had been six months, he always made you blush. Whether he simply looked at you, said something or you just thought of him. You always did.

He always said that you looked pretty whenever you blushed because of him. That he loved that he could always make you flustered. And loved when you tore your gaze away because then he had an excuse to touch you, so he could grip your chin and make you meet his eyes.

Which is what was happening now.

He chuckled before his rough calloused hand was cupping the side of your face, turning you to face him, “You can’t hide from me, sweetheart,” he teased. Your hands clenched around nothing as you felt butterflies in your belly and closed your eyes. Making your mate howl with laughter at your antics. “So you can kick my ass, but can’t look at me.” He said between laughs.

Your voice came out meeker than you wanted, “Yup.” A small smile on your lips as the sound of his mirthful laughter filled you ears again.

You heard rustling and movement like he was standing up, but then he was kissing you. Your lips slightly parting with a soft moan as they met, his tongue swept over your bottom lip before exploring your mouth. Resting your hands on his bare tattooed chest, his hands slid down, roving over your body, squeezing your tits firmly.

Moaning into his mouth as he did so and he squeezed harder before wrapping his hand around your throat.

Hesitantly palming him through the pants of his fighting leathers, making a growl fall from his lips. The sound had you squeezing your thighs together for some type of friction.

Palming him again, this time more confidently, but he pulled back. Giving you a panty dropping grin as he shook his head. “Not yet, sweetheart.”

Cassian hoisted you up, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist as his hands held you up by your ass. Walking you back into the House of Wind and into his room.

Once you got to his room he sat on his huge bed—big enough to accommodate his large wings and then some—and kept you firmly seated on his lap. Your eyes scanning his face and without realizing it you were smiling at him.

He grinned back, “What?”

“Nothing,” you murmured quietly.

“Tell me.”

You sighed softly, “I—I really want to be with you but,” you looked down at your hands while you picked at your fingers. It was something you did whenever you were nervous or anxious.

Cassian looked down and saw that your left thumb was going to be picked raw soon and grabbed your hands, stopping you. He gave them a reassuring squeeze before bringing them up to his kiss-swollen lips and kissed them.

Gold hazel eyes meet yours with a familiar warmth as he sent love down the bond, calming you.

“But. . . what?” He questioned.

Your voice was barely a whisper, “I don’t know what you like or want and I don’t—I don’t. . . ugh I don’t know.”

“Do you want to know what I like? What I want, sweetheart?”

I didn’t say anything, only nodding my head for him to continue.

“All right. I’ll tell you what I like and want,” he brushed your hair back, out of your face, “If you tell me what you like and what you want." Your face felt like it was on fire, breath hitching and Cassian wore a smug smirk on his face at seeing the effect his words had on you.

You swallowed thickly, settling onto his lap to be more comfortable, “You first.”

His eyes darkened. “I like you, I want you. But what I really want is you on your knees, looking up at me with your big doe eyes as I fuck your mouth,” he swiped his thumb over your lips. “Until you’re crying and drooling because of me, is that all right with you, sweetheart?”

Your heartbeat quickened, “Yes.”

“Good girl. Now tell your mate what you want,” he ordered.

“I want you to be a “good boy” and let me ride you until you’re begging me to let you cum inside me,” You said quietly, looking at the swirls tattooed onto his chest.

He tilted your chin up and tutted, “Speak up, sweetheart.”

Your eyes met his. “I want you to be a “good boy” and let me ride you until you’re begging me to let you cum inside me,” you said again louder this time, keeping your eyes locked on his.

His pupils dilated and you felt him harden beneath you at your words and thoughtlessly rubbed your clothed cunt on him. “I’ll do whatever you want, you only have to ask,” he promised. His voice rough with need.

“Promise?” You breathed.

“Promise. . . I’ll do whatever you want." He swore.

You leaned forward to kiss him, silently letting him know you would do whatever he wanted too. Grinding down harder onto him as his hands gripped your ass and then he was pulling your shirt over your head along with your bra. Then he was swirling his tongue around your hardened nipple making you let out a sharp exhale before sucking on them harshly.

You let out a loud hiss when he nipped at them roughly, back arching, “Was I too rough? Did I hurt you?”

“No,” you breathed. “I love it when you’re rough, because even when you are rough there’s a gentleness to it. I don’t know how to explain, but it’s perfect. I just want you to always be touching me.”

He kissed you again while his large calloused hands gripped your hips. Moving you at the pace he wanted, making us both moan at the feeling. “I want you on all fours. So I can pull your hair and slap your ass raw. I want to see my handprint in the same color of red you are when I make you blush.” You let out a loud moan at his words, clenching around nothing.

You bit your bottom lip so hard, that you tasted blood on your tongue, letting out a shaky breath, “I want you to call me your “perfect your little slut” while you spit in my mouth and fuck me until I can’t think. And when we’re done I want to be covered in you.”

Cassian threw his head back, screwing his eyes shut as he groans, “Gods, you’re gonna be the death of me.” A wet spot forming on his fighting leathers from our arousal.

“At least you’ll die a happy male.”

[bosinclairsgff]

It’s been ages since I’ve requested any sort of thing but do you think you could do something where the reader finds a way to break out of the firefly house which leads to a whole chase scene with Otis? Love some dark stuff.

I loveeeee this!! Thanks so much for requesting!

I hope you enjoy what I did with this request! I tried my best, it’s maybe longer than you had hope but I was hanging fun haha! Much love xoxo ✨🫶🏻

Warnings : typical Rob Zombie violence, cussing, abuse

I had been trapped in the firefly house for over a month. The things I have seen and been put through are absolutely horrific. While being here Otis, as I’ve come to know him, and his sister Baby brought back a group of friends. They turned one of the men into a fish man hybrid. They made me watch as they brutally tortured him and murdered him. From what I could tell Halloween had come and passed in my time being with them. Baby had brought me candy one night when she had gotten back from somewhere. She and mama were the only ones to treat me sort of normal. Otis on the other hand, he made me sit in his room for days just watching him work on his “art” and listen to him rant about everything. Sometimes he’d forget to feed me and I’d starve for days. It’d take a yelling from Baby for him to remember. I don’t know why they haven’t killed me yet. I mean sure, they mentally and even sometimes physically abuse me. If I don’t say the exact thing Otis wants to hear he’ll take a razor and cut my arm or leg. I’m always getting yelled and or hit.

I’ve spent my whole time being here trying to find away to just get away from these people. Sometimes, Otis will untie me to go hangout with Baby or even to use the bathroom. He’d watch me use the bathroom but when I saw Baby it was just her and I. Depending on what time of day Otis let’s me go see her, sometimes she’ll fall asleep as I sit in her room. I knew that was my only chance. So, I waited, I waited until he was in a good mood and let me visit her one night. “Do you want to visit Baby tonight? I think you deserve a little vacation.” He chuckled at his wording choice. “Yes please Otis.” I whisper timidly. Otis nods in response, satisfied with my answer. It was only about 6pm when he asked me, I knew it was to early, and plus baby wasn’t even home yet. It was around 10pm when Baby got home, she clearly had been drinking. “Y/n!!! I hear we get to hangout tonight sugar. We should watch..um..a movie! Yes, a movie! A scary movie!!” She says stumbling around the room. Otis walks over to me, rolling his eyes. He unties me from the chair I was bond to. “I don’t want her to spend the night in there Baby, bring her back in a few hours, got it?” He barks at her. “Yes, yes okay whatever you say.” Baby respond while grabbing my hand to pull me away to her room.

She immediately sits me down on the floor and she takes the bed. Baby turns on the tv and finds a movie she’s satisfied with. Normally she’d let me sit on the bed and she’d brush and style my hair, tonight though she seemed exhausted. We sat there for about 20 minutes just watching the movie. When I looked up I found her fast asleep. I knew this was my chance. “Baby” I whispered slightly. I got no response. I slowly got myself up off the floor, I know I don’t have the best strength considering I’m starved most of the time. I just assumed adrenaline would kick in and get me out of this hell hole. I make my way quickly but quietly out of Baby’s room, down the hall and to the steps. I check my surroundings, making sure no one had noticed me lurking about. I take a my first step on the stairs, no sound, I take my next step, quiet creek. The third step I take gives everything away. I put my full weight down and a loud creek rings through the whole house. I can hear Otis’s footsteps getting close to opening his bedroom door. “Baby, is that you? What the hell are you doing. Don’t take her downstairs.” Otis yells. I waste no more time and book it down the remaining steps. I can hear Otis kick open his door and start running after me. “Get your sorry ass back here right now y/n!” He’s screaming through the house. I ignore his words and make it out the front door, it’s very late and I can barely see where I’m going. I just keep running as tears fly down my cheeks. “Run rabbit, run rabbit, run!” I can hear Otis not far behind me. I can feel him getting closer and I can feel myself getting extremely tired. If I can just keep going a little longer maybe I can escape him. Suddenly that thought is erased from becoming reality as Otis tackles me to the ground, I let out a loud scream. I immediately try to fight him off of me, kicking and hitting him as hard as I can. He struggles to hold my arms down but eventually he does. Both my arms are above my head being held down with what feels like all his weight. Otis’s legs are on either side of my hips. “You dumb fucking cunt. I let you leave the room and this is what you do in return. You are such a fucking idiot. I should have killed you the day I brought you here.” With that being said he takes one hand away from holing my hands above my head and reaches to his belt where he keeps his huge hunting knife. My blood immediately runs cold. Is this where it all ends? I was so close to freedom and now I’m going to be gutted alive. Before I can imagine even more awful ways he could kill me he has the knife to my throat. “I was starting to think maybe, just maybe, I could keep you around as my little pet. What a dumb fucking thought I’ll admit. You stupid bunny.” He smirks. “Please…please…Otis I’m sorry..I’m so sorry. I swear on my life I won’t try to run again. Just don’t kill me please.” I say as I feel the hot tears run down my face. He pushes the knife harder against my neck. Hard enough to draw blood, I wince and shut my eyes. “Look at me y/n.” Otis growls. I quickly open my eyes. “Please…” I whisper. He leans closer to me until our faces are pressed to each other, I can feel his breath on my lips. He smells like alcohol. “I’m so sorry” I whisper again. He gets back up and frees my arms, only to take his hand and slap it harshly across my face. I let out a loud shriek. Otis was still holding the knife to my throat, which cut my neck even more when he hit me. “You ever pull some stupid god damn stunt like this again y/n…and I’ll hang you up like a pig and skin you alive. You got that bitch?” He says while tilting his head to the side. I let out a soft sob and respond. “Yes! Yes I do Otis, I won’t ever do it again I swear. I’ll be so good I promise. Thank you.” I say just above a whisper. He’s satisfied and takes the knife from my throat. Otis stands up and reaches down to yank me up with him. It was a long walk back to the house. He dragged me by the hair the whole way. When we made it “home” he brought me back to the room and threw me on the floor. “Stay right fucking there.” He shouts.

Otis is gone for a few moments but comes back with a bottle of whisky and a bandage. “Lay down on the fucking floor and don’t make a sound. If I hear a peep I swear to god you’ll wish you were dead.” He states sternly. I do as he says laying on the dirty floor, I hadn’t noticed but my neck had been bleeding quite a bit. Without any warning he pours the whisky on my neck, I bite my lip until it bleeds as to not make a sound. He wastes no time wiping away the blood and whisky. When he’s happy with the cleanliness he wraps my neck securely. I can feel the tears once again falling like a waterfall. Ripping me from my pity party, Otis pulls me up from the hair putting me back in my dreaded chair. Tying my hands the tightest he possibly could. “Dumb fucking bunny.” He whispers in my ear.

[what-gs-watching]

"Even if this all ends up in a puddle of burning goo, we can go off together!"

So. I was supposed to be in Boston this weekend enjoying some well-earned time with my tiny baby nephews that I haven’t seen in over four months, but, right before my flight, I tested positive for COVID because my husband’s job is stupid and they forced him into an in-person trip last week and tada! EVERYONE got COVID. 

I’m furious. So I got into bed and I cried about it and I felt sorry for myself and I tried to settle down and THEN I saw the news about Good Omens season 3. 

And so now I’m feeling more terrible things on top of terrible things. And I hate it. And I’m devastated. And slightly relieved. And sad. And grateful. 

If y’all are unaware, season 3 is now just a single, 90 minute episode that will supposedly wrap up a universe that has become so large, so important, to so many. And that feels like a gut punch.

The thing is - Good Omens saved me last year. I’d watched the first season when it came out in 2019 and then kind of forgot about it, but was excited when I learned about the second one. I went back and re-watched the first and then dived into the second and it took over my heart and my brain. I finished it maybe a week or two before I was unceremoniously fired from my toxic-as-fuck job and I was absolutely unmoored and I needed something

And thankfully, Good Omens was there. It was a way for me to shut my brain off, lose myself, without actually losing myself. I absolutely could have been extremely self-destructive just then, I have that streak in me and it runs deep, but I didn’t have to follow it because I was too distracted by a 6,000 year love story between two beautiful idiots. 

So I watched the entire thing again (and again) because I couldn’t get over it, the brainrot was real and welcome, and I wrote about it here, and then I found the @goodomensafterdark subreddit (because it turns out, I’m a little bit of a creep and so are they) and I fell into fanfic and all of that is the main reason I made it through nine months of devastating, trying, numbing, soul-crushing unemployment. 

And maybe found myself a little bit, too. I’ve changed, I know I have, and it’s good and it’s odd and I think I like it.

And all of that is absolutely because there’s such a huge community around this show. It’s absolutely fucking beloved and it speaks to weirdos like me because it’s malleable and it can be whatever it needs to, to whoever needs it. There’s so much possibility, the breadth and depth of the universe and all of its history and two perfectly imperfect characters finding themselves and each other inside it. The potential of the story is alluring. And the things that have been created by the people who connected with it, the art and the words, it’s beautiful (‘Pray for us, Icarus’ and ‘Factory Settings’ and ‘How do we turn on the light’ and fucking ‘Shutgun Wedding’ and people like @vavoom-sorted-art and goddamn @gleafer, I mean FUCK), and it helps this world we all cherish expand even further. 

Which is why the people that love it, that have been touched by it, just want an ending that does it justice. And it’s horrific to have to accept that someone who helped create this universe and these characters that have dug themselves into our lives could be an absolute fucking degenerate, but honestly, haven’t we’ve moved beyond that? They don’t belong to him now, they belong to all of us. It’s heart wrenching to think that one piece of shit could taint something so beautiful, so I understand the grief. We were promised more time, and it’s hard to let go of that.  

But it could have been worse. Based on the chatter Amazon was ready to pull the plug entirely and I get that, why risk it? Who wants to roll the dice on something apparently partially created by someone like that? Cutting their losses just makes sense. 

So I’m thankful too, that we get something, and we get something because there are still good and amazing people behind this thing that love it as much as we do. That understand it’s become bigger than just another show churned out by one of the many streamers. That’s something we can rejoice in. 

The important part is, we’ll get an ending. And it’ll be ‘canon’, but you know what, y’all? Fuck canon. We apparently have been following the wrong anti-christ all this time, so does it really matter what’s considered “true”? We’ll get to see David and Michael bring something to life one more time, and that’s beautiful, being able to visualize it - appreciating the swing of Crowley’s hips and Aziraphale’s micro expressions and his heart eyes and the very specific and beautiful chemistry these two overwhelmingly perfect actors bring to these characters, but that doesn’t have to be the final word, it doesn’t have to be the ONLY thing we get - 

because Good Omens has a life of its own, it’s a self-contained universe and it invites anyone in, all of us in. Whoever you are, come as you are, join this weird fucking multiverse and make of it what you need. 

Aziraphale and Crowley are husbands. They’re wives. They’re best friends. They’re eldritch horrors. Crowley never fell. Aziraphale fell. Neither of them fell. Both of them fell. They’re angels and demons. They’re humans. They’re a ghost story. And a love story. And a horrifically tragic story. And a fantasy. And a fairytale. And they’re trapped in a time loop. Or they both spent 6,000 years on earth but didn’t meet each until recently. They’re feuding history professors. Or unlikely roommates. Or exes trying to reconnect. They’re an archangel and a duke of hell attempting to stop the fucking second coming. 

They’re soulmates attempting to settle in the South Downs and figure out what it finally means to choose each other. 

They’re all of that. They’re everything, all at once. They’re whatever you see in them, they’re what you need them to be. 

The point is, these last 90 minutes, these precious 90 minutes, are hard won, and I’m starting to believe they’ll be beautiful and satisfying because I need to, but they’re also just a jumping-off point. The story doesn’t end. The universe continues to grow. Because all of you wonderful people out there, writing and creating and appreciating something that speaks to you, sharing it, letting it connect us. 

Beauties, Good Omens belongs to all of us. It’s bigger than flawed humanity and dubious business decisions. It’s OURS. So feel what you feel, but also feel lucky, because like Michael said, it’s going to be okay. After all, even if this all ends up in a puddle of burning goo, we can still go off together (forever, in whatever way we choose).

[otherone12]

Oh, Baby... You're Mine

Vampire!Gerard Way × Reader

-> Masterlist

A/N: Hey!! I’m weirdo and vampires are fucking hot, so I has to write a something like this (no judgement, pleaseeee). Hope u enjoy it :)

Summary: The boy in your class is shy and weird, but you've always been nice to him, making him create an obsession. The problem is he's a little weirder than you thought… I mean, he literally drinks blood, and wants YOU and YOUR blood, and he won't take "no" for an answer.

- Word Count: 2.090

- Warnings: She/her pronouns. Blood things, pet names? Kidnap, AFAB SMUT!

IF YOU DON'T LIKE THIS KIND OF CONTENT, DON'T READ!!!! YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE CONTENT YOU CONSUME.

- Ps: I'll not use y/n…

- Ps2: Sorry for the smut, i'm not used to write this, i'm still learning already. (:

- Ps3: I'm brazilian, so english is not my first language... sorry if i wrote something wrong.

___________________________________________

1st Person POV

Gerard has been my classmate since the beginning of the year. I've never talked properly with him, but everyday I say “hi” to him with a smile. 

His black hair fell perfectly on his unhealthy pale face when he bent over the table to draw. Maybe the way he didn’t talk to anyone, or the way he kept his attention on his drawings during the class, I don’t know, but he's really cute. 

Sometimes my pastime is to find him looking at me, when he notices I stared back, he stops staring and gets a bit blushed. 

This has been happening for some months, and I got a bit tired of this, so I walked towards him at the end of the class, knowing he has free time. I crossed the empty classroom, and stood in front of him. Gerard looked up at me and swallowed hard, looking a bit nervous.

- Hi! - I started with a kind smile - Am I bothering you?

- H-hey… N-no you’re not… - He tucked his hair behind his ear, taking his eyes from his draw. His voice was high-pitched and pleasant to hear. - I wanted to talk to you, but I was afraid of being creepy. 

We talked, and I noticed that we had a lot in common, passion for art; for good music and old movies; so we kept the conversation going as long as we could. He didn't smile even one time, but I thought he liked talking to me as much as I liked talking to him.

In the next few days, Gerard and I had small conversations during the free periods, but nothing more than that. I started to think about him as a friend, ‘cause somehow he made me feel great.

Wasn’t like I thought of him as some kind of partner or something, but it is nice to know that if I need someone to talk to, I can go and speak to him. I haven’t many friends, none actually, I just didn’t feel comfortable with anyone, but he was different, someway.

After class, on an ordinary day, I was walking alone with my headphones on, and the cold wind of fall in my face. Going home, I felt something weird on my way. I didn’t know what was wrong, but the sensation of being followed haunted me for some streets. 

Faster than I could understand the whole situation, I felt a strong hit in my head, I fell on the floor, beating my head on the asphalt. The pain didn't last longer than a few seconds, cause i had already fainted.

Opening my eyes slowly and with difficulty, I couldn't see an inch in front of me because of the dim light. When I tried to rub my eyes with my hands, I realized that they were tied apart. I began to panic, noticing that I was tied to a bed, with my hands on different sides of the headboard and my legs spread with my ankles tied to the other end of the bed.

My first instinct was to scream, and I did. I got no response, but a door was opened, making the room a little brighter because of the light coming from it.

Before the door was closed, in the few seconds that the room wasn't pitch black, I saw that the room had a gothic aesthetic, with old paintings, black veils covering the windows, candles and chandeliers filling the room, and the old structure itself attracting attention.

I heard the sound of footsteps approaching, unable to make out anything. Soon I felt cold hands tracing my face and going down to my neck. I froze, the soft skin of those hands was almost soothing, but I couldn't let it take away my focus. I screamed again, but my mouth was covered pressing hard on my dry lips.

- You don't need to scream, darling. - A familiar voice reached my ear, making me even more nervous - I won't hurt you, hun. At least, not now.

 Slowly, he took his hand away from my mouth and I didn't scream, for fear that the situation might become worse than it already was.

- G-gerard?! 

I said, stuttering and with my voice muddled by fear.

- Aw how cute, you recognize my voice. - His tone didn't sound friendly, but threatening. As he spoke, he caressed my cheek. - There's no need to be afraid, baby.

- W-why are you doing this? - I cried, and he dried my tears with his thumb. - please, let me go

I begged to no avail, only to hear a harsh laugh coming from him. 

- I'm doing this because you’re different from the others. But you already know that, right, princess? - He moved away from me and lit some candles, letting me see the room more clearly - Do you know how much time I spent observing you? The way you talk, the way you smile, the way you walk... The way you look, damn! All pretty, all perfect, but never all mine.

His delicate fingers holding the candles looked like some hypnotic thing, and i couldn’t stop stare at them.  

- I’m not the only one who think about you like this, i’m fucking sure about that. - The disgust in his voice, probably thinking about the guys who asked me to hang out with them, made him seem genuinely concerned about me. - So I couldn't wait any longer to finally make you mine.  

Gerard’s voice became serious, while his disgust turned to seriousness and possessiveness. The sound of the old wood on the floor creaking filled the environment while he walked toward me again. 

- I love you. I always have. And I know you love me too. - A fatherly countenance, together with the heat emanating from the candles, left the environment less morbid, but still gloomy.- If you didn't love me, you wouldn't have spent so much time with me, would you?

- You're crazy! - I screamed, still crying. - I've talked to you very few times. I've never said anything about love!

- You didn't say it, but I felt it. - Now, with the light brighter, I could see the highlight of his white skin contrasting with his black clothes. - You don't know what it's like to spend eternity looking for the right person. 

He walked towards me again with a smile I'd never seen before. The closer he got, the more outward his teeth became. My heart races when I realized that those was FUCKING FANGS! And “eternity” was meant literally.

He sat on the bed next to me and looked me in the eyes. His bright hazel iris bore into mine and sent a chill down my spine.

Panting, my nervousness increased and he noticed. Keeping his smile, letting it be obvious how he was enjoying this situation.

- You're so pretty, do you know? - His hand was on my body again, unbuttoning my blouse. He licked his lips admiring my exposed chest - The most beautiful woman in this world, and all mine.

I opened my mouth to protest, but the stern look he gave me shut me up.

My hands remained tied as he ripped the sleeves of my blouse, removing it completely.

- Please don't... 

Again, I tried to react, but he was already unzipping my pants, ignoring me. The only thing I could do was hope that he would feel sorry for me, and stop doing anything.

- Darling, you're mine now. Don't worry, I'll be nice... - his hands passed over me, who were now covered only by my black lingerie. - but just if you behave like a good girl. Will you do this for me, baby? Can you be a good girl?

While he spoke, his fangs turned apparently, in a perverse smile. He leaned over me and pressed cold kisses down my torso, past my ribs and up closer to my breasts, making me fight the pleasure that was slowly consuming my mind. A moan was about to escape my lips, but I bit it back, muffling any sound that might come out. 

- Looks like someone's enjoying it, huh?  - he hummed, with a haughty tone in his voice - I told you. You love me. 

I tried again to say something in protest, but this time it would be a lie. Not that I loved him, but I was involuntarily enjoying it. He licked his lips in such a hunger, I couldn't help but shiver. 

His hands slid down my panties, pushing them aside. He teased my entrance and made me sink my teeth even deeper into my bottom lip. He looked with satisfaction, laughing darkly, and said In a practically growl.

- Very wet, aren't we? 

I mumbled in response, trying not to make my state of hopeless obvious. Gerard removed his hand from inside me, and positioned himself on top of me, with his knees on either side of my waist. 

- You know I'm about to turn you into the same beast as I am, right? - I barely heard what he was saying, but his voice, at the same time that left me panicking, made me melt into the bed. - I just want to have some fun first. Vampires are cold... but don’t worry, you'll get used to it. 

Gerard undid his black  jeans, springing his boner free. I got shocked by the size, and he let out a grin with his shiny fangs. The situation itself could be romantic, like candles and a pretty guy who apparently loves me… but the kidnap shit messes with all of this.  

He thrusted his dick in me in one move, not even trying to be kind. I was in some kind of state of mind, forgetting that he was abusing me, I started to enjoy the situation. 

- Don’t be shy, honey. - He groaned, going somehow deeper. - I wanna hear all those pretty noises. 

It didn't take too long and I felt my orgasm getting close, and like he said, I moaned really loud, breathless, I felt him come inside of me. 

He kissed me passionately, muffling while I screamed in pleasure against his lips, reaching my apse. The taste of cigarettes mixed with red wine was good, and I kissed him back, needing and wanting more of him. 

I caught myself thinking of how I would feel being with him forever. I’ve never felt like that, loved by someone, cared for by someone, and Gerard gave me all I begged for at last few years. His electric touch, this erotic feeling he brought me, was it that bad? He said “turn you into the same beast as I am”, does it mean he’s gonna bite me? ‘Cause he looks exactly the same way as a vampire does in my mind. 

- Are you ready for this, hun? 

He whispered, biting soft my bottom lip, running his hand to my neck. 

Before I could even respond, his teeth were already buried in my artery. I could feel the heat of my blood being sucked from my veins. The feeling of his tongue running across my neck made the pain milder, even so, the piercing and sharp sensation of pain ran through my body, as did his hands, which touched every inch of my torso. 

As he tightened his grip on my waist, my warm blood began to drip from the corner of his mouth, painting his pale skin a bright red. When he finally let go of my neck, he left kisses at the bite site, moving up towards my jaw and finally reaching my lips again, smashing them hard. The taste of my blood now filled my palate, while our tongues intertwined in movements that seemed to have been rehearsed.

Soon, I found myself out of breath, and feeling tipsy by the smell of wine he emanated. 

The strength in my entire body seemed to have been removed, and I felt really weak. Gerard held my face with one of his hands when he broke the kiss looking for some oxygen, while his other hand was still squeezing my hips.

Quickly, my vision became blurry, and I could only feel his cold lips hit mine again and my body collapsed in that bed, feeling like i was on fire and leaving the scene outside like one of the paintings I saw in his sketchbook once

- G-gerard...

I mothered in a whisper.

- Shh, you'll be fine, baby. I'm gonna take care of you, and we'll be happy ever after. 

He caressed my hair and rocked me. Little by little I lost the last lapses of consciousness, becoming completely off.

___________________________________________

~ So... that's it, guys!

PART 2!

[stonylovessteve]

2024 Creator Reveals

We’ve reached the end of the exchange and that means it’s time to reveal the creators of all our works.

Thank you for putting so much love and effort into Stony Loves Steve 2024, you really made it a great experience. We hope everyone loved it as much as we did!

Giftees, be sure to leave a comment and kudos on your gift if you haven’t already. All our creators worked hard to make this event a success, so show them some love.

You can now post your work publicly outside of the exchange. Tag it as #stonylovessteve2024 on tumblr and we’ll reblog you. @ us @stonylovessteve on twitter and we’ll retweet you.

Below the cut is the final list of all the works produced for the exchange and the creators.

Still Halfway Human, Just Going Through It by Becci_chan for soliloquent (MCU, 9.9k Words)

Stark Industries was still an incredible place to work. Everyone seemed so dedicated and smart and ambitious, it truly reminded him of Howard and his vision for the future. Steve had even seen Tony Stark a few times in passing or when he made his rounds and talked to Steve’s superior in the office, but he hadn’t talked to him more than a greeting in passing. He wasn’t even sure Tony, who insisted on being called by his first name, had actually noticed him during these times. Steve had noticed him all the more.

Give me the luxuries of life by BladeoftheNebula for Thahire (MCU, 4.9k Words)

Four times Steve reluctantly dabbles in a little luxury + one time he leans into it wholeheartedly

Hot Bouncer by Infinitywrites for Becci_chan (MCU, 2.7k Words)

‘Hey Steve, We had a very interesting last night. Love to stay and elaborate on that but have to take my playful pet baby – Toothless  for a run. Left some hangover cure you might need. Feel free to use the shower or anything else you need. Be back soon. T.S”

The Long Game by betheflame for waywardmillennial (MCU, 2.6k Words)

Steve prided himself on being a patient man, he really did. He had stared down Nazis, and HYDRA officers, and the British Press on that one horrible media tour. He could spend hours plotting strategies for situations which may never happen but might, and he had been known to accompany Pepper on her stress-relief shopping trips. Steve could hold his tongue. Steve could outmaneuver his opponent. Steve could play the long game. That last donut broke all of that.

not a lot, just forever by Thahire for AirlocksandAviaries (MCU, 2.7k Words)

A few months after the Battle of New York, Tony invites Steve over to see the apartment he has built for him. Steve, of course, is totally normal about this and not panicking at all.

give me your number (i’ll give you mine) by ishipallthings for BladeoftheNebula (MCU, 1.2k Words)

Somehow, Tony freaking Stark showing up at the store isn’t Clint’s biggest shock of the day.

Cap’s Comics by sadieb798 for robertdowneyjjr (AA, Comic)

The local newspaper/magazine/online publication runs a comic about the Avengers — from thwarted robberies to statues come to life, they are sort of like funny little recaps of the team’s latest missions that New Yorkers have witnessed. Then the comics start becoming more… domestic, showing the Avengers at home during game nights and weekend brunch. There are even a few where Cap and Iron Man go on a date together. The team comes across these comics and no one realizes Steve’s the artist. After all, the drawings are barely better than stick figures, and Steve’s art is much more refined than that… right?

i live in a city that lives in a different age by soliloquent for ohjustpeachy (MCU, 10.8k Words)

Steve Rogers has fourteen days to complete fourteen therapy homework assignments.

Five Times Steve Woke Up Early (And One Time He Didn’t) by AirlocksandAviaries for ABrighterDarkness (MCU, 8.3k Words)

Steve’s not actually a morning person, despite his body’s insistence. It’s quite possibly the one thing about the serum he’s not immensely grateful for. Forcing himself up and on a run to burn through the overwhelming, restless energy that builds bright and early would be much more tolerable if it were a few hours later. Tony decides to do something about this.

Steve is a (Wonderful) Person But A Terrible Patient by Neverever for sadieb798 (MCU, 3.5k Words)

Tony is assigned a new patient, Steve Rogers, who has a lot of medical issues and Tony is ready to help. But he finds he has something to learn from Steve.

Come With Me by ChocolateCapCookie for meidui (MCU, 3.4k Words)

“Do you have any plans for the weekend?” asked Tony. “Besides trying to volunteer at every charity in New York, of course.” Or the one in which Tony isn’t sure if Steve is a stalker or just a really, really good guy.

I surrender to you(only you) by captainstars for AvengersNewB (MCU, 1.6k Words)

He doesn’t know if the first time is a mistake. The phone rings. The sound is so unnatural that Steve almost doesn’t answer it. And then he scrambles for it, but the finger that presses on the answer button is still impossibly gentle. ‘Steve,’ Tony mumbles. Steve squeezes his eyes shut. It’s late in the night, but no one in the compound sleeps. It’s quiet nevertheless, and for a moment the only response Tony gets is Steve’s rasping breaths as he tries to gather what is left of himself.

Courting the Old Fashioned Way by zappedbysnow for Infinitywrites (AU, Art)

There’s a new mechanic in town. He bought a small ranch and fixes cars on the side. Steve is just being neighborly, welcoming him with some pie. It has nothing to do with the guy being cute. Nope. Not at all.

in the laundry room by wingheads for captainstars (616, Art)

steve isn’t so much ashamed by getting caught holding tony’s underwear in his hand as he is aroused by catching tony secretly wearing his jacket.

my curse is that I bill by the hour by picturecat for Fluffypanda (MCU, 5.5k)

Steve Rogers, the 21st century, and his no-good, really awful, legitimately-cursed first week in it.

(you look so lovely) running through my head by robertdowneyjjr for tinystark616 (MCU, 5.9k)

All his life, Steve has dreamed of a gorgeous brown-eyed brunet genius who’s too smart for everyone around him. Everything points to these being soulmate dreams, but that doesn’t make any damn sense when it seems like Tony’s in some far off future and Steve is just trying to get through a life of illness and poverty in 1930’s Brooklyn. Against all odds, they meet anyway.

In the Depths by waywardmillennial for WikketKrikket (MCU, 5.1k)

Prompt: Steve gets pranked on national TV as part of a charity TV fundraiser. It’s embarrassing, and leaves him feeling shaken in a way he didn’t anticipate. But it was for a good cause. So he’s fine with it. Really.

you’ve really missed a trick when it comes to love by meidui for ChocolateCapCookie (MCU, 2.3k)

Steve thinks he’s happier than he’s ever been, or at least he should be. This is the closest he’s ever come to having everybody he loves in one place and the Compound doesn’t echo with emptiness anymore, and he’s seen more of Tony in the past few months than he has in the last seven years. He’s still getting used to being with Tony again, this softer, older version of him, and how difficult that makes keeping his hands to himself because all he wants to do is touch him.

good enough for you by tinystark616 for Neverever (MCU, 4.6k)

Steve is having self-esteem issues because he feels like he isn’t good in bed. Tony finds out and decides to do something about it.

All I Need by VenomousSoliloquy for purpleicedteas (MCU, Art)

Sometimes Steve finds himself lost in doubt. Tony always knows exactly what he needs.

Summer Whispers by ABrighterDarkness for starksnack (MCU, Art)

Tags include ‘horseback riding’ but there is no provided summary.

my plus one has a plus four by starksnack for zappedbysnow (MCU, 7k)

five first date attempts + one first date

Magnum Opus by FrankTheSnek for wingheads (MCU, 6.3k)

Magnum opus (noun): a great work; a large and important work of art, music, or literature, especially one regarded as the most important work of an artist or writer. Steve does not believe in true mates, they are just an old wives’ tale. The man he has been dreaming of and turned into his greatest masterpiece is just an imagined muse and nothing more… Right?

Now and Then by Wikketkrikket for picturecat (3490, 10.6k)

Things haven’t been right between Steve and Natasha since she got back from a business trip overseas. How did things go so wrong, and can Steve make them right again? Also; they’re trapped in a basement.

Just Right by AvengersNewB for LadyGigi (MCU, 2.3k)

Omega Steve wears sexy lingerie, even though he’s deeply insecure about the way he looks in it. Alpha Tony is there to show him how perfect he is; wearing the lingerie and in general.

I’m on fire, but I’m trying not to show it by Fluffypanda for FrankTheSnek (MCU, 2.3k)

Steve misses being an omega. Tony helps him out with that.

Wish You Were Here by One and Five Nines for ishipallthings (MCU, 1.8k)

Steve starts sending Tony postcards

[Comic] Man Out of Time, Fish Out of Water (Prologue) by LadyGigi for VenomousSoliloquy (MCU, comic)

Mermaid Steve is swimming to the ocean surface with a bag full with human trinkets for his friend, Sam, to demystify when he comes across a red comet in the sky- at least that is what it looks like until it flies over him, revealing its humanlike form, and crashes into the water near the human island. Steve must decide if he will heed the warnings of his kind or investigate this once in a lifetime occurrence.

[yourmanz-sodapop]

Settling in together

Namjoon x Top! Male reader

Warnings: N/A Part 2/3

“Ok, This couch is perfect” Namjoon must’ve said that about four couches already. “Didn’t you say that about the previous couch?” you asked. “Well yes, but this one feels different than all the other ones. I’m telling you baby this is the one.” he pouts. “You’re sure this is the one baby?” “Yes, this one, let’s buy it.” he says, clapping his hands. He was excited, how could he not be? You gave him complete freedom to decorate your home. So far he had chosen the dresser and nightstand set as well as the curtains for all the rooms of the house and now the couch. 

“Ok, couch set check, next up is… kitchen table.” you see him from the corner of your eye walking off towards the kitchen area, as you're talking to an employee about what you want and how fast you can get it shipped to your house. 

Walking towards the area you last saw Namjoon, you find him sitting at the head of a kitchen table, his eyes narrowing on every empty seat. “What are you doing?” “shhhhh, I’m trying to see if this would match the look I’m going for.” “What look are you going for?” “Right now I’m leaning towards a minimalist vintage look. I think it suits us both, you're an old soul” letting out an amused chuckle you lay your head on top of his, “Anything will be fine, now hurry so we can go look at the paintings you want to hang up.” Say no more Namjoon was up and looking around trying to decide. You knew it would get him to hurry up. 

You need the house finished by next week but it seemed he forgot every other second. You’d made plans to have his parents over to actually see your new home, and to show them with proof that you are serious about their son, before it was just your words and small things you did. They loved you, they loved you just for the fact that you loved their son, that was enough for them but still you wanted to show them that Namjoon would always have a home with you, and that you could provide for him regardless of the fact that he made a shit ton of money from being an idol. I mean you also made a lot of money, you owned a finance company, one that you just branched over to Europe and hopefully soon you’ll add another branch in Korea near where you lived. As you were walking around looking at the different pieces of art, one specific one caught your eye. It was the same one you had in your office back home in America. It brought back a lot of memories.

“When are you coming back to visit?” You couldn’t stand seeing the tears on his face through the screen. “I don’t know, there was a problem with the construction crew, I need to go to Europe to see why they put a hold on it. I’m going to be gone longer than I thought I was, I’m sorry my love.” you explained. You’d already been gone for three months, signing contracts, getting permits overseeing construction for the new branch. “You promised you’d be back before I left on tour. I leave in two weeks.” he sobbed. You know how much it hurt, you haven’t seen each other in three months and now you have to break your promise about sending him off on his tour. You didn't say anything, what could you say to make him feel better? “I have to go” he whispers, “Namjoon, wait-” he hung up.  It was one of the lesser bad moments in your relationship. But it was quickly fixed, you flew out that same night and postponed your meetings to spend the remaining two weeks with Namjoon. 

“Babe!” Turning your head Namjoon was looking at you worriedly. “I called your name five times, are you ok?” He was carrying 6 pieces. “I’m fine baby, is that what you’re getting?” you asked. “Yes these, did you talk to the sales clerk about buying the couches?” “Mhm” “Ok then let's go, we still need to buy kitchen utensils and groceries. I’m not ordering take-out again.” “I’ll cook.”

Getting everything you needed for your new home took longer than you expected it to. Namjoon couldn’t make up his mind on a few things like rugs so you did have to go to a few other places the next day. Thankfully Namjoon found all the things he wanted and was satisfied with the end result of your house, now all you needed to do was wait for the weekend to come.

 You were both enjoying yourselves with this new dynamic of reality, a reality where you both didn’t have to fight your schedules to see each other, nor hide the fact that you were in love. His fanbase took it better than you expected it to, of course there was some negative backlash. Mostly  girls being upset that they wouldn’t have a chance to woo him, rather than the fact that he was with a man. It was a bit of a shock at first  but you got used to seeing your face more on social media.  The boys of course were over all the time now that the place was completely furnished with everything working as it’s supposed to. Now Namjoon understands why you got a three bedroom house.

Next>

[crybabycinna]

Yall remember when I made a post about modern day Lin getting nudes from her girl yeah here’s a smut about that post….idk why I decided to write this. I have fun writing modern day Lin stuff it’s funny and I would love to do a series but idk!

Lin and I have been dating for a couple of months now. It’s really nice! She's so kind and funny but she doesn’t think she’s funny but I do. It’s been a while since she and I had sex so I thought it would be a good idea to rile her up a bit. I went through my lingerie drawer to pick something she’s never seen before. Once I found my outfit I laid it out then went to take a shower so I could shave. I wanted to be soft when she came over. I did my best to be patient as I shaved since I wanted to make sure I got every bit of hair. I know Lin doesn’t care but I care. When I finished I made sure to wash my body then get out.

I put on lotion to make myself baby soft. I fixed up my hair and did a little makeup then put on my outfit. It was a pink baby doll lingerie set that had pink thong panties. I fixed my boobs in the mirror to make sure they looked good for my pictures. I set my phone up and took multiple pictures and did multiple poses. I only liked seven of them but that’s better than nothing. After I finished I took a deep breath and texted Lin.

Me: hiii

Lin: hi sweetheart, are you alright?

Me: yeah I’m fine, are you busy?

Lin: not really just doing paperwork in my office

Me: ok good because I have a surprise for you

Lin: you do?

Me: mhm

I selected the seven pictures I wanted to send to her. I’m so nervous it’s not like I haven’t sent nudes before but things with Lin are just different.

Me: *attachments have been sent*

I closed my phone and ran off to the kitchen to make myself something to eat so I didn’t have to bother with my phone. I can’t imagine what she’s gonna say, we’ve never sent nudes to each other before. I tried to keep myself distracted in the kitchen for a long time but literally only six minutes have passed! When ten minutes had passed I couldn’t help myself. I had to check my phone! I just had to! I picked up my phone and opened it to Lin’s text.

Lin: you look magnificent

Lin: you truly are a work of art

I fell onto my bed and kicked my feet. I can’t believe she said that. My heart fluttered in my chest.

Me: theres more for you if you come over tonight

Lin: I’ll be there please keep the outfit on

Me: anything for you

Lin: good girl I’ll see you at six

Me: see you then

When she called me a good girl I let out a whimper. I can’t wait till she comes over! I need to make my room look presentable! I started cleaning up. Putting things back to where they need to be, vacuuming, and making my bed. When I finished I ate the food I made and tried to figure out what to cook for Lin, or if we should just order from somewhere after sex. I don’t think I’ll be able to cook when she’s done with me so maybe we’ll just get takeout.

Six o’clock came and I heard a knock at my door. I fixed my hair again then checked my makeup. “Everything is fine.” I mumbled to myself then went to answer the door in my lingerie. I opened it up to see my tall older girlfriend. “I’m glad you could make it.” I said as I let her in. I closed the door behind her. “I wouldn’t miss the opportunity of fucking you in your pretty outfit for anything.” Lin said and pushed me up against the door. I let out a gasp. “You’re so beautiful.” Lin said as she pinned my hands above my head. “Please.” I begged. “Please what?” Lin asked. “Please touch me, I’ve been thinking of you all day.” I said.

“I’ve been thinking of you too.” Lin said then started to kiss my neck. “Lin.” I moaned out. She moved her leg in between my thighs and I immediately started to grind on her. Lin let go of my hands and grabbed at my breast. “Fuck.” I sighed out. “You’re so beautiful.” Lin said and pulled down my baby doll dress. I could feel myself getting more wet. “You’re making a mess all over my thigh baby girl.” Lin said. “Please Lin more. Please.” I begged. “Tell me what you want, baby girl.” Lin said. “I need you.” I whined. “You need me to do what?” Lin asked.

“I need your fingers please.” I begged. “Good girl you have manners.” Lin said. She picked me up and carried me to my bedroom. Lin gently laid me down on the bed then put her bag down on the floor. “Take your panties off.” Lin commanded. I did as told and tossed my panties somewhere across my room. I looked over at Lin and she was stripping off her clothes. I bit my lip as I watched her. She's so beautiful. She had some scars that I know she didn’t like but I thought they were beautiful just because she’s beautiful.

“You like what you see?” Lin asked. “I love what I see.” I said. She smirked at me. “You’re absolutely stunning.” I told her. “So are you baby.” Lin said and leaned down to give me a quick kiss. I smiled and she climbed into the bed. She kissed down my body. “Linny.” I moaned. “My perfect girl.” Lin said as she kissed my thighs. “Please Lin, I need you. No more teasing.” I begged. “Since you said please.” Lin said. Her tongue swiped against my folds and I whimpered. She sucked on my clit and I gripped the bed sheets.

Her fingers slipped inside of me and she slowly pumped them in and out. “More daddy more.” I whined. She pumped her fingers faster and my back arched off the bed. “Lin.” I moaned out her name. She scissored her fingers. “Please don’t stop.” I begged her. Lin removed her mouth from my clit and replaced it with her thumb. “You look so pretty with my fingers inside of you.” Lin said. I pulled her down to kiss me. I need more of her. When Lin pulled away and I whined. She rubbed my clit faster and I arched my back. “So good daddy.” I moaned. “You’ve been waiting for this all day?” Lin asked. “Yes daddy.” I moaned.

Lin removed her fingers from my pussy and put them towards my mouth. I sucked them clean while she started to eat me out again. “Mmm!” I moaned around her finger. Her tongue plunged deep into my walls, licking every inch of me. I gripped her hair. “Fuck!” I cried out. My heart was pounding in my chest. She makes me feel so good. My legs started to shake. “Daddy please don’t stop, please!” I begged. She gently pinched my clit. I let out a yelp then orgasmed. I shook some more and she continued to eat me out. “No more daddy please.” I whined and tried to pull away from her.

Lin pulled away. “You can’t take anymore? I brought my strap.” Lin said. “You should have started off with that.” I told her. Lin chuckled. She got up then grabbed her bag and pulled out her strap. I watched as she put on the harness and I let out a whimper. “Be patient, my pretty girl.” Lin said as she tightened the straps. “I want you daddy.” I said and reached out to her. “I know, baby.” Lin replied as she got back into the bed. I kept my legs spread and she kissed my thighs then rubbed her cock on my slit.

“Daddy.” I whined. She slowly pushed inside of me and my eyes fluttered closed. Once she was all the way inside she slowly pulled out then slammed back in and started at a rough pace. “Mmm fuck!” I cried out. Her lips crashed against mine as she fucked me. I gripped her again and moaned against her lips. Lin’s nails dug into my thighs as she fucked me. “You make me feel so good daddy.” I whined. “You take me so well baby girl, I’m so proud of you.” Lin said. I whimpered. “You’re such a good girl for me aren’t you?” Lin asked.

“Yes daddy! I’m a good girl! I’m your good girl daddy.” I moaned. “Yes you are baby, you’re my good girl. My good fucking slut.” Lin growled. My eyes rolled back as she started going harder. The way she squeezed my throat and fucked me had me trembling. I could barely think. “You look so pretty while I fuck you.” Lin said. “Daddy!” I cried out. “Yes baby girl, what is it hm?” Lin asked mockingly. “Please faster.” I choked. “You want faster? Can you handle it?” Lin asked. “Yes daddy please.” I begged.

She started to pound into me faster and I arched my back off the bed. “Daddy I’m gonna cum.” I croaked. Lin let go of my throat and started to rub my clit. “Cum for me baby, cum all over my cock.” Lin growled. “Daddy I’m so close.” I whimpered. She rubbed my clit faster. “Cum for me.” Lin commanded. “Daddy!” I cried out as I orgasmed for the second time that night. “Good girl.” Lin praised as she fucked me through my orgasm. My body shook. “No more daddy please.” I said. She stopped. “You did such a good job, baby girl.” Lin told me.

“Thank you daddy.” I said. Lin slowly pulled out and I let out a soft sigh. “I love you.” I told her. “I love you too.” Lin said and kissed my cheek. I smiled. Lin left the room then came back with some water. “Here baby.” Lin said. “Thank you.” I said as I sat up and took it. Lin took off her strap then went to the bathroom. I drank the water. I heard Lin start the shower. Lin came out of the bathroom. “Come on baby.” Lin said. “Help.” I held out my arms to her. She came over to me and picked me up. We went into the bathroom then got into the shower. Lin put my shower cap on then washed my body.

I helped her wash her body then we got out and she dried me off. Then dressed me. “What do you want to eat?” Lin asked. “Cake.” I said. “Baby girl no.” Lin said. “Why?” I asked. “Because that’s not good food.” Lin said. “I want cake,” I pouted. “No baby girl.” Lin told me as she was drying off. I folded my arms. “Oh don’t you do that.” Lin said. I turned away. “Do you want pizza?” She asked. “Ok.” I said with a big smile on my face. “Good girl.” Lin said.

[yikesharringrove]

you've gone a little bit MIA is everything chill

Well hi there. I’ve come off of a really terrible month, but I’m doing mostly okay. My dad has been in and out of the hospital, and my car was fucked up. My AC was broken for three weeks while it was over 100 degrees here everyday, I need a ton of dental work that I can’t afford, and inspiration has been lacking. I don’t have a job and my cousin stole a bunch of shit from my grandparents’ cabin after my grandpa died and then told everyone else that we couldn’t take anything because my uncles sold the place as is. I don’t have a job and I can’t really afford my rent and my apartment is going to be sold out from under me next year. I got so sick it made my gout flare up the worst is has in years and I can barely walk some days.

But I’ve also watched some really good movies lately. I’ve been playing with my cousin’s little babies a few times a week, and I’ve gone to so many bucket list concerts this summer. I got a new (used) Bowie LP and Jack White released a new album. I’m in a new band and we’ve written four songs about religious trauma. I found an Alice Cooper record in a Monkees sleeve that belonged to my grandpa and I cried because I’m seeing Alice this week and I’ve never felt closer to my grandpa. I stayed with my parents while my AC was busted and helped my mom take care of my dad which also meant I got to watch the Tour de France everyday, and I cried when Mark Cavendish beat the stage win record. I took up ballet again and even though I haven’t been able to go to class in a few weeks, I’m excited to start again. I volunteered at an arts festival yesterday, and had a game night with my friends. Rocky Horror season is back, and rehearsals are the best part of my week. SLC Punk is going to be back in theaters for a little bit and I’m going to see it with a friend.

In all, I don’t know. Things have been kinda shit lately but things have also been kinda good. I’ve had some inspiration today, and I’m hoping to write something more. I a,so saw Orville Peck again, which means I’ve been bursting with ideas for Show Pony.

[liaromancewriter]

Every Day

Premise: Cassie shows Ethan she’s ready to move past the miscarriage and look to the future.

Book: Open Heart (post series) Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Cassie Valentine) Rating/Category: Teen. Fluff. Words: 710

A/N: Submission for @choicesmonthlychallenge March prompt “Smile”. Using @choicesflashfics week 24, prompt 1 & 3 (in bold). I'm also using story starter prompts (no.9) from @creativepromptsforwriting for an anon request. Tagging for reblog to @creativepromptfills Latest art commission from the amazing Art by Ainna on Instagram!

She had made a promise to him that she would probably break today. Cassie Valentine knew her husband was worried about her despite her assertions that she was fine. But there was a reason why Ethan Ramsey had been one of the country’s top diagnosticians. Nothing got past him.

Ever since that fateful day last month, she had thrown herself into her work. Between her responsibilities as head of Edenbrook’s Diagnostics team and polishing up the manuscript for her book, she made sure every hour of every day was accounted for.

Anything to not have time to think about what she’d lost. The baby they had lost.

But she was so tired of being sad. It wasn’t her natural habitat.

The Cassie she knew enjoyed watching panda videos on Pictagram, dancing to a fun song with the love of her life even when he grumbled, and laughing. She missed the warmth of a good laugh.

So, today she was determined to get back to who she was. Being stubborn will get you nowhere, she told herself. It was time to look forward.

As Cassie poked inside the fridge, she pushed back the long sleeves of a blue shirt she’d borrowed from Ethan’s closet. It was her favorite color on him, harking back to their first meeting. Today, she wanted to be reminded of that. And everything they were to each other.

The first phase was cooking a lazy Sunday morning breakfast they could linger over. During the week, their respective duties at the hospital kept them busy. But from the beginning of their relationship, Sunday had been theirs to do whatever they wanted together.

The morning sun shone through the floor-to-ceiling windows, its rays brightening the kitchen. Music drifted from the Bluetooth speakers, the playlist set to shuffle. Cassie’s hips shimmied to the music as she plated bacon and eggs and carried the platter to the kitchen island.

She was pouring orange juice when Ethan’s hands slipped around her waist from behind. She leaned back against him, savoring the heat of his body surrounding her. Angling her head to give him access, she shivered as he trailed kisses down her neck.

“Good morning,” his deep voice rumbled, turning her to face him.

Cassie smiled up at Ethan, a familiar mischievous twinkle in her green eyes as she scanned his body from head to toe. His chest was bare; his dark blue sleep pants hung off his hips in a way that was entirely too appealing for words.

Her arms circled his shoulders, and she stretched on her toes to kiss his mouth, a soft brush of lips. He deepened the embrace, and his hands clutched her sides.

Cassie broke away first, whispering against his lips. “Thank you.”

When he quirked one eyebrow in confusion, she explained. “I know I haven’t been myself these last few weeks. I appreciate your patience despite the fact that it doesn’t come naturally to you. I love you even more for it.”

“You’re a mess. But you’re my mess,” Ethan quipped in such a deadpan manner that Cassie doubled over in laughter.

“I’ve missed that laugh,” he said wistfully.

Cassie stilled at the sentiment as much as the words. She reached for his hand and laced their fingers together.

“I’ve missed us,” she confessed. “I promise you that I’m going to work at being fine. We have each other, and that’s what matters.”

Ethan squeezed her hand in comfort, in acknowledgment, in love.

“Dance with me,” she said when the music on the speakers changed to something soft and romantic.

She held out her hand, and he took it, gracefully pulling her into his arms. Cassie looped one arm around his neck, and Ethan rested his hand on her lower back. He clasped her free hand and placed it on his shoulder, covering it with his.

And then they were dancing, their bodies rhythm perfectly matching the song. When he dipped her dramatically, his strong hand sweeping along her back, her joyous laughter bounced off the walls.

As they continued to dance around the kitchen, blue eyes locked with green, Cassie’s heart lifted at the thought of spending all her days with Ethan. Love like this was surely worth everything.

-----------------------

All Fics & Edits: @annfg8 @bluebelle08 @coffeeheartaddict2 @crazy-loca-blog @doriopenheart @genevievemd @headoverheelsforramsey @lucy-268 @jamespotterthefirst @jerzwriter @lady-calypso @mainstreetreader @takemyopenheart @potionsprefect @queencarb @quixoticdreamer16 @rookiemartin @socalwriterbee @tessa-liam @trappedinfanfiction

Submissions: @choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

Ethan & Cassie only: @cariantha @custaroonie @hopelessromantic1352 @mrs-ramsey

[joyinks]

this is a comic i wrote about my experience with my parents. transcript is available under the cut. if you have ever felt similar i want you to know that i see you and wish you all the happiness in the world, it is possible to survive. we can do it together.

TEETH by JOYINKS

My parents brought me toothless and screaming into the world one very cold February while they were meant to be on vacation. I think they’re still bitter about it.

I was an only child for three years. It takes time for teeth to develop.

There aren’t too many photos of me from back then. When my baby brother was born the cameras began flashing more often. Smile!

I grew to be a vocal child. Since about nine months of age I could speak in full sentences, and I walked early too. My aunt recalls driving with me in the back seat when I was only a year old. As we passed a local chapel I called out to her, grinning,

« My what a beautiful church that is! »

Around the age of six most children begin to lose their teeth. I was reading classic novels. I remember this, not that there are any photos of me. The camera stayed pointed at my brother.

My smile had grown in crooked. It didn’t hurt.

When I turned ten my parents took me to get braces. I had to have six teeth pulled in the process. Too young to understand anything about the procedure aside from the pain, I still sat silent and diligent while the orthodontist worked.

Sometimes I grit my now-pristine pearly whites and ask my mom if she thinks she was fair to both of her children. I try to delicately and specifically phrase the question,

« Why did my brother get a car for his sixteenth birthday when I only got a hot wheels toy?»

She said it was because my teeth were too expensive and they cut into her funds for me. Cut into them like the surgeon peeled back my gums in a series of procedures I undertook, underage, to beautify my mouth. 

I wonder if she’s forgotten that my brother had braces too.

When I turned 18 I moved out of my parents’ house. I went to the big city to attend a prestigious arts college. My parents were disappointed. My dad laughed enough to show teeth when I showed him the acceptance letter, saying,

« I can’t believe you actually got in. »

I graduated top of my class and received many awards for it. In my graduation photos I can hardly smile. My brother ended up taking an extra year of high school to bump up his grades.

When I got accepted into a Master’s program across the globe, I remember pleading with my parents to cosign a loan for my education... I had bitten my tongue and paid my way by working until then.

My brother got accepted for a general business degree and my parents took off work to tour the school with him and help him move in.

I find myself thinking often about everything my brother has in common with my parents. Sports, cop shows, conservative humor, grilling on the barbecue while getting drunk to country music. A small, sharp pair of incisors that didn’t need to be pulled down with chains.

I wonder how I turned out so differently, despite trying with my whole heart to conform.

« I’m a lesbian. »

Blurted out at the dinner table one night, this statement silenced my dad to the point that he said he couldn’t talk to me about it, even days later. I could feel how he wanted to spit the words out of his clenched jaw.

My parents were always touting how much they gave me before that.

« ADHD, Bipolar II, OCD, PTSD »

Eventually the weight of my untreated mental illnesses made me collapse. To this day I haven’t fully recovered.

Getting love from a parent shouldn’t be like pulling teeth, they say. I’ll nod when I hear that. After all, teeth come out easy.

[wooahaes]

first snowfall

pairing: non-idol!hyunjin x gn!reader

prompt: first snow

word count: 0.5k~

warnings: snow! reader is from a place w/o snow. this is just short n soft.

daisy’s notes: y’know now that i’m getting to the end of the month, i kinda wish i had done these in a different order lmao. im bad at titles shh

“What do you mean you’ve never seen snow before?”

Hyunjin sat on your couch as you were finishing loading your dishwasher before your weekly movie date night. He’d already done his share of the prep work (busting out the comfy blankets and bringing dinner) while you were carefully setting things in to be washed--after about a thousand apologies for letting time get away from you and prolonging rom-com hours. He’d mentioned that it started snowing that morning, and since it was your first winter living in a place where it’d snow... you’d made the confession casually enough.

“I mean,” you said, closing your dishwasher, “I’ve never seen snow before.”

“Really?”

You looked up from the settings you were fiddling with, “Why would I lie?”

Hyunjin frowned at the statement, before looking back up at you. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, baby, I’m sure I’ve never seen snow before. I haven’t left the apartment today since it’s cold out.”

He said nothing in return, and you could see the gears turning in his mind. Without a word, he stood up, walking over to grab his coat.

“Wait, are you mad?” You asked, “Like--I know some people are surprised, but I’ve never had anyone get mad before--”

“We’re going out,” he said.

“What about our food?”

“We can heat it back up,” he said, pulling his jacket on. “I want you to see snow.”

You nodded toward the window, “We can watch it from here--”

“No!” He pouted, making his way over to you, “I want to go outside and dance with you in the snow,” he said outright, taking your hands in his own. “Please? Just for a few minutes? If you hate it, we can come back inside.”

You almost said no because movies and cuddling and dinner seemed nicer... but Hyunjin pouted at you, and you scoffed before calling him out on playing dirty. He knew that if he pouted, you’d be more likely to give in--there was a reason you refused to go to art stores with him now. You were meant to keep him from dropping too much money on supplies, and all it’d take was him giving you one sweet look for you to budge and agree to buy him a new sketchbook or a new watercolor set.

(Truthfully, you liked spoiling your boyfriend in little ways like that--as much as it hurt your wallet sometimes...)

You let out a sigh, “Fiiine.” And then you leaned in, pressing a kiss against his lips, “You’re lucky you’re handsome.”

He cracked a smile, pulling you back in for a longer kiss before letting you go change. “I love you,” he called out, softer than ever at the romantic ideas he was spinning in his head. You’d called back something about how he’d better make this perfect, and Hyunjin laughed (sounding more in love than ever).

Maybe he’d dip you down while dancing with you, kissing you again while smiling into it. Just to maximize on the romantic idea playing in his head.

taglist: @twancingyunhao​