#i have never thought i'd make it to 100 followers 😭

[subspace-t-mine]

ooc: WHAT THE PHUCK I JUST CAME BAXK ON TUMVLR WHEEE DID YOU ALL XOME FORM

waaaahwhahha tha ktyou guys!!!!!!! thankyyou fvery very mcyh :3 ily WHJAEJJJDWKAWJ /p

[spookuzm]

Hello! I'd like to say thank you so much for following me! It really means a lot. I never thought I'll get this far, to be honest. But you guy's support really motivated me! You guys are just so nice!

And this is VERY late but here's the DTIYS for my 100 followers goal!

YEAH I KNOW IM LIKE SUPER LATE AND IM REALLY SORRY BUT I GOT BUSY WITH IRL STUFF 😭😭

BUT THAT'S A LOT OF FOLLOWERS- I'M ALMOST AT 200 ALREADY—

TBH I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WHEN I REACH 200 FOLLOWERS

Well anyway- enough of me ranting, I'll just show you!

Here it is! Yes I know it doesn't have shading and lighting. I'm planning to have my art style not having those (maybe? i might change my mind in the future)

By the way, this is important but there would be no art prizes because of two reasons!

First reason, I already do art requests, so it would be kinda pointless for this to have art prizes... /lh (and even though it's closed rn, I'm planning to reopen art requests soon ^^)

And my second reason, this DTIYS is just for fun! :D

Also here's my horrible ref sheet for Crust. And make sure to use the Underground version of him!

Now for the guidelines and rules:

• You can change the perspective, pose, and the background! Go crazy!

• If you don't want to draw the gaster blaster, you can draw flaming sharp bones or red sharp bones (or you could do all of them, but it's entirely up to you! ^^)

• You can also add more gaster blasters/bones!

• Traditional or digital, whichever you prefer! ^^

• Don't use AI or Gacha (sorry moots who like gacha 😭)

• And lastly, use the tag #spookz100dtiys and tag (@) me!

• Don't trace D:

[beomiracles]

hihi , firstly, congrats on the big 500!!! i’ve never sent you any asks before bc i’m shy even thru anon but your writings are amazing!!!! i often find myself re-reading criminal conscience because the way you write is just so detailed and perfect! since it’s the last day of requesting today, i wasn’t sure if you’re taking in any. but if you are, i was wondering if you’ve ever thought about writing an enemies to lovers for beomgyu? i’ve never requested before so i might not be good at expressing 😭🥹 but i was thinking academic rivals sort of thing where they’ve been rivals throughout most of their school years but they actually hold a soft spot for each other much like the netflix series ‘never have i ever’ i just love seeing 2 nerds not realising how much they actually love each other and are meant for one another like the fluff, angst, (sexual) frustration. chef’s kiss!

500 BASH SPECIAL

#serene adds ✎... hii anonnie!! please don't be shy to talk to me I love love love interacting with you guys! :> YOU REREAD CRIMINAL CONSCIENCE? I think my heart exploded (づ๑•ᴗ•๑)づ — i loved your idea super super much, it's not very angsty rather fluffy I'd say but I still tried to incoorperate the enemies part! I hope you can still find it a good read >.<

wc -> 1.8k

pairings academic rival!beomgyu x afab!reader warnings enemies to ???, nothing crazy i'd say !

You let out a startled noise as Beomgyu slams his test paper down on your desk. Blinking up at him, you’re met with a menacing expression as he cocks an eyebrow toward his paper, a big 100%, written in red marker presented next to his name. You frown as you let out a small scoff, “you came all the way over here to shove a mere paper in my face?”

Beomgyu sneers as he snatches his test back, glancing down toward your own sheet which you immediately cover with your hand. — It doesn’t take him much effort to pry your guarding arms away and his eyes widen as they land on the 87% mark. The smirk that quickly etches its way to his lips is enough to make your stomach drop as you breathe out a heavy sigh. “Holy shit, you suck!” He exclaims, followed by a breathy laugh. 

You shoot him a glare, “fuck off will you?” It was already bad enough that you had scored lower than him, you had also scored low enough to where it might affect your total grade. The last thing you needed was Beomgyu’s endless nagging, a constant reminder of your failure. Math was hard, it was perhaps the only class you couldn’t quite wrap your head around, Beomgyu on the other hand, seemed to have little issues as he sauntered around with his test sheet held high. 

“Hey!” A few familiar faces approach your table and you sit up a bit straighter. “How’d it go?” One of the guys asks, you can’t quite place him but you know that he also took this class. Another girl nudged his side, “what — are you stupid? Obviously she scored a hundred, she’s just as smart as Beomgyu, maybe even smarter.” The girl turns to you with an expectant smile and you feel your chest churn with disappointment. 

The first guy leans forward, “what’d you answer on question 15?” He wonders as he tries to sneak a glance at your paper. “I…” you quietly begin as you fumble for an excuse, “well I…I can’t remember”, you nervously chuckle. “Ah”, he leans back slightly as he frowns, “then can I see your paper?” — You bite your lip as your gaze flits between him and your test sheet, gripped tightly in your hands. “I don’t know”, you mumble and he groans, “oh come on, just one peek..” he presses. 

“She said no”, Beomgyu’s firm voice cuts through the tense air as the guy snaps his head in his direction. “Yeah but she knows the answer–” he begins but is quickly cut short as Beomgyu pushes his own sheet against his chest, making him stumble backward in the process, “then look at mine instead”, he grunts as he turns his back on your confused classmate. 

Bewildered, you glance between Beomgyu and the retreating group of people as they flip through his test paper. You open your mouth to say something but Beomgyu has already turned on his heel as he made his way back to his own desk. — It was odd, shouldn’t he be thrilled to let everyone know just how much of an idiot you were? Thinking back, you couldn’t recall a single instance in which he had been kind to you. Excet today. 

Determined to score at least a 95 on your next test, you find yourself in a quiet corner of the library as late afternoon turns into early evening. Outside the window, students were emptying out of the large building as they headed home, the library had been almost vacant for the past hour. Your gaze drifts back to the multiple sheets of papers splayed across your desk, containing all sorts of advanced formulas. Your fingers rubbed the sides of your temple as you tried to decipher the equations before you. At some point, the letters and numbers had just started to blend together, creating one big mess and you groaned as you let your head drop forward. 

Suddenly, the large oak doors of the library are pushed open and your ears perk up as you follow the sounds of footsteps approaching. You frown, who else would come here at such an hour, if not…Refusing a heavy sigh, you glance up to see Beomgyu pulling out the chair next to yours as he takes a seat beside you. — You could already imagine all the things he had to say and you cursed yourself for not choosing to study at home. 

However, he remains quiet beside you as he leans back in his chair, his hands shoved in the pockets of his jeans as he gazes ahead without as much as a word. Awkwardly, you shift in your own seat, reorganizing a few papers as you peer at him through the corner of your eye. — Finally you can’t take it anymore, “what do you want?” The question comes out like more of an accusation, but you don’t care.

Beomgyu shrugs before glancing over at your papers. “Advanced algebra?” He asks as his gaze travels over the, in his eyes, familiar formulas. Nodding, you internally groan, expecting a snarky remark. His next words surprise you. 

“Do you need any help?” 

It was a baffling statement coming from Choi Beomgyu, especially when directed to you. For as long as you could remember the two of you had been neck to neck when it came to your grades. The number on your papers suddenly determined a lot more — it determined your pride, perhaps even your happiness. There was truly no such feeling as scoring higher than Beomgyu, the bitter look on his face whenever you shoved your results up his nose. But then came your advanced math courses and suddenly, you weren’t playing in the same lane anymore. 

You frown as you turn in your seat, searching his face for any kind of mischief. But you find nothing. Beomgyu tilts his head to the side as he studies you with a small grin, “algebra is pretty shit”, he then says and you feel the corner of your lip twitch into something dangerously close to a smile. “Yeah”, you mutter as you slide your book across the table for him to have a look. — “Ah um, question 29”, you quietly mumble and Beomgyu nods as his gaze flickers to the equation on the page. 

“You need to factorize this part before you can find the value of x”, he says without tearing his eyes from the book. You blink as your eyes flit between his face and the paper in front of him, then back to your own unsolved equation in your notebook. Upon noticing your silence he lifts his gaze to look at you. “Do you have an extra pencil?” He wonders and you nod as you scramble to open your pencil case. 

“Start by breaking out 2 from all of these”, he says as he leans over to write alongside your failed previous attempts. When this close, the smell of his perfume fills your senses, he smelled like fresh apples, neither sweet nor sour, just…nice. You try your best to keep up with the movement of the pen as he breaks down the equation, explaining things as he went. Though your gaze slowly drifts to his fingers around the pencil, to the small watch around his wrist, to his exposed forearms, his shirt pushed up to his elbows, your eyes trail along the faint veins, noting how the muscles there flex as he grips the pencil. 

Your gaze then flickers toward his face, inches from yours, his lips moving, though the words coming out goes unregistered by your clouded mind. You watch the slight flush of his cheeks, his soft hair falling across his forehead. You watch his eyebrows twitch, his dark eyes unwavering as he focuses on the problem at hand. — You don’t even realize when he stops talking, the air around you falling into a thick silence. It’s not until he lifts his gaze over to you that you finally jump back into action. 

Blinking away the surprise, your lips part as you search for a way to explain yourself. Beomgyu beats you to it, “did that make sense?” he asks, if he had caught on to your blatant stare he didn’t comment on it, you felt grateful. Biting your lip, your eyes drop back to his neat handwriting, “I uh…” Not really, no. But you couldn’t possibly say that. 

“Here, I’ll walk you through it”, he says as he points the tip of the pencil toward the beginning of his lengthy calculation. This time you get it right, and a small part of you felt hopeful, like you actually had a chance at scoring those 95%. — “Hey um”, you turn to him with a hesitant frown, not wanting to come off as ungrateful, yet you don't think you could go without asking. “Why are you doing this? I mean, helping me, didn’t think it would be in your best interest..” 

Beomgyu remains quiet as he watches you with a small smirk, “I suppose not.” He then sighs as he leans back against his chair, the scent of apples suddenly diminishing from your radar. “I saw you in class”, he drawls as he twirls your pencil between his fingers, studying it intently, “I guess I realized…it doesn’t feel particularly good to win if the odds aren’t fair.” His eyes snap back to yours and he offers you a small grin. “Don’t you think?”

Your lips part but no words come out and you find yourself gawking at him almost dumbfoundedly. Was this really the same guy you had been competing with all these years? In the golden glimmer of the setting sun, Choi Beomgyu suddenly looked different, very different. — “I do suppose you are right..” you mumble as your gaze drops to your paper. 

Beomgyu reaches over to his bag as he rummages through it, seemingly in search of something. The small rustling noise garners your attention as you subtly peer over at him. “I actually came here to ask”, he begins as he slides a textbook over toward you. Immediately recognizing the sleek cover, your fingers trails across the title. Mythology was your favorite subject, and the book before you, well you knew it by heart. 

You give him a questioning glance as Beomgyu sheepishly rubs the back of his neck. He clears his throat, “I uh, I came here to ask if you could help me with this.” He quickly motions toward the book in your hands, “I…I’m stuck on chapter six”, he mumbles and you flip the book open, easily sorting through its contents. 

The corner of your lip twitches as you place the textbook between the two of you. Beomgyu gives you a hopeful look and you offer him a genuine smile, it was probably the first time you had smiled in his presence.

“I’ll walk you through it. After all, winning isn’t fun if the odds aren’t fair.”

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[helloalycia]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑'𝐒 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐄𝐑 [𝐓𝐖𝐎] — 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐋𝐄𝐗𝐀

one / masterlist / wattpad

summary: as you adjust to your new life as the Commander's healer, you're forced to watch her fall in love with someone else.

warning/s: mentions of injuries, violence, graphic deaths, the usual stuff that comes with writing for the 100.

author's note: second and final part is here! sorry it’s a little delayed, it’s been a busy one lately! pray i get out of my writing funk bc i miss it so much 😭 anyway, i hope you enjoy this one, i didn’t know how to end it, warning you now lol. Also any mentions of Costia are completely made up based off what i could remember, plus i tried to keep her appearance as vague as possible as she’s technically not got a face claim lol. Enjoy!!

Lexa fell into the role of Commander as if it were her birthright, which I suppose in a way it was.

Nothing fazed her, not the meeting on meeting that filled her days, or the responsibilities now weighing on her shoulders, or even the expectations everyone in the city had for her to be as great a Commander as the last one. She took it all in her stride, performing her duties the best she could. I couldn't have been prouder.

Working with her only made things better for us, since I wasn't sure I'd have seen her as much if I didn't. She was always busy, but she always made time for me. Though she had Titus to go to for guidance, she would still confide in me, a habit I was sure would be difficult to break. I, of course, offered all the help I could. Leading was important to her and she was important to me. What more was there?

It didn't make a difference to me, but clearly Titus thought more of it than I realised. It was a few months into Lexa's new role when he thought to bring it up to me. I was bringing a tray of mine and Lexa's dinner to her quarters one evening, the two of us having planned to eat together, when I saw Titus approaching me in the hall.

"Y/N," he acknowledged with a curt nod and narrowed eyes. "May I speak with you?"

"Right now?" I asked, lifting a brow and glancing at the tray in my hand.

"It won't be long," he assured me, barely giving me chance to reply before he continued, "It's about you and Lexa."

"What about us?"

He seemed mildly irritated as he spoke, "I know that you're a big part of her life, but in the past, you've happened to keep your distance. Now that she's Heda, I expect it to stay that way. No distractions."

I furrowed my brows with confusion. "I'm sorry, I don't follow..."

He tensed his jaw, lowering his voice. "I'm not blind, Y/N. I see the way you care for her."

"Yeah, she's my best friend," I remind him, though a small part of me was nervous at what he was implying.

He wasn't stupid, instead rolling his eyes at my response. "Be sure to keep it that way."

I swallowed hard. "That all?"

"That's all," he said with a hint of annoyance, before walking past me.

My fingers gripped the tray with frustration as I kept walking to Lexa's room. How could he know of my feelings for her? I kept them well hidden for many reasons. And even so, what did he expect from Lexa? To never fall in love? Be married to her work? That was preposterous.

Admittedly, his words had more of an effect on me than I thought, rattling around my brain as I joined Lexa in her quarters.

"...are you alright?" she asked me after accepting her dinner. "You seem distracted."

I blinked, meeting her eyes. It would have been easy to tell her that Titus was being confrontational and rude for no reason. One word and she'd boot him out, no questions asked. But as much as I hated him, he was somewhat good for her, having guided the previous Commander too. Lexa couldn't do this alone, she needed someone with experience. Experience I didn't have. Stirring discontent between them would be for nothing other than a personal vendetta, and a worthless one at that.

No, I couldn't do that.

"Sorry, it's just been a long day," I lied, offering her a small smile. "Bit tired."

"Well, eat your dinner and you can go off to sleep," she said with a soft smile, patting my shoulder.

I nodded, putting her at ease enough for her to dig into her own dinner.

Truthfully, Titus had nothing to worry about. I was too cowardly to make a move anyway.

—

17 years old...

I should have known it would happen eventually. What was I to expect? That she'd stay single forever?

It didn't make it easier to deal with though, especially because the girl in question was absolutely lovely and I couldn't hate her for any reason other than she was with the girl I loved.

Lexa and I were returning to the Tower from a meeting she had at someone's house in the centre of the city when they met. It was a little busier than usual today because of some sales on produce nearby, so we were manoeuvring our way through the crowd. As we did, Lexa accidentally walked right into an oncoming girl, a bit too harshly than intended, and immediately went to apologise.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, I–" she started, steadying the stranger, but she stopped short when she looked up.

"Oh, no, I'm sorry," the girl apologised, smiling softly, and then her eyes met Lexa's, animated and beautiful and captivating Lexa in an instant. "I should've watched where I was going."

I glanced at Lexa, who was entranced, expression softening and mouth slightly open.

"Who are you?" she asked without thinking. "I haven't see you here before."

"My name is Costia," the girl introduced herself, as captivated by Lexa as she was with her. "I'm from Floukru, but I moved here for a change."

Lexa smiled, putting out her forearm respectfully. "It's nice to meet you, Costia. I'm Lexa."

Costia returned her forearm shake, but then realisation crossed her expression. "Wait, Lexa as in Heda Lexa?"

She was about to kneel, but Lexa stopped her with a chuckle, certainly surprising me. She was already infatuated, it was obvious, and I felt uneasy.

"It's okay, there's no need for that," Lexa assured her with sparkling eyes.

Everything about the way she looked at her to the way she couldn't seem to remember I was even here irked me. She liked her, clearly, and I couldn't blame her. Costia was everything I wasn't. She had the complete opposite features to me, a delicate nature about her, and she wasn't afraid to make her attraction to Lexa obvious.

I gave them space, not that they noticed, and my suspicions were confirmed later that evening when Lexa gushed about her crush on this mystery girl, having asked her out when I left.

The jealousy was poisoning me, but I couldn't blame anyone except myself.

It didn't take long for them to officially get together, to my dismay. And because of this, it meant I spent less time with Lexa because she was spending most of her free time with Costia. Titus didn't take this new development any better than I, looking just as bitter as I felt, though for different reasons.

He made it known to me when we were both in the throne room one time, waiting on the side as Lexa had called us in for our counsel on something, but was first finishing her conversation with Costia. I avoided looking their way, resisting the urge to roll my eyes from nothing other than an innate and unfair jealousy. Titus, however, was glaring holes in their direction.

"I don't like this," he mumbled to me.

I sighed. "I bet."

At this, he tore his gaze from them to glare at me. "You weren't this bad."

"Gee, thanks."

He rolled his eyes. "Costia is going to be a massive distraction."

I glanced at him disapprovingly. "She won't. Lexa is happy. Leave her be."

As if annoyed that I didn't disapprove as he did, he scoffed quietly and crossed his arms, continuing to glare at them.

Unlike him, I couldn't hate on their relationship, not even because I was jealous. Costia was lovely, carefree, kind and she made Lexa happier than ever. Plus, she was nothing short of nice to me every time she saw me. How could I hate that?

—

I thought I was finally getting used to them together, but there were still times when I felt like I'd been replaced, as horribly selfish as it sounded.

With the intention of grabbing Lexa for a meeting, I let myself into her room as I always did, but realised she was sat on the bed and Costia was stood over her.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt," I said awkwardly, unsure what I was even interrupting.

As I backed up to leave, Costia stepped to the side to reveal Lexa with war paint swiped across her eyes.

"Doesn't she look daring?" Costia said with a proud smile, paint in her hand.

Despite the bittersweet feeling of it all, I couldn't help but smile at Lexa. "Of course."

Lexa returned my smile and stood up, before saying to Costia, "It was actually Y/N who first put this on for me. When we were kids. And then it just... stuck."

The memory was as fresh as ever, leaving me with a sour taste in my mouth. Oh, how things had changed since then.

"You had the right idea," Costia told me sweetly, before looking to Lexa with adoration. "It looks great."

I swallowed hard, forcing a smile. As they gazed at each other, I felt like a third wheel and decided to leave.

"What did you need, Y/N?" Lexa called before I could.

"Just grabbing you for the meeting, but I'll meet you in the throne room," I said nonchalantly.

She smiled, nodding. "Okay. See you in a minute."

Deflated, I left. Just another thing to get used to.

—

19 years old...

The scream was ear-piercing, strained with utter horror and ricocheting off the Tower walls. I woke with a fright, jumping out my skin. I didn't even need to be told – I knew who it was immediately and my heart squeezed into nothingness as I left my bed and hurried down the hall where Lexa's quarters were.

The guards that watched the halls were too slow for my liking, trailing behind me like lost lambs. I took the lead, concerned and confused and uneasy as I pushed her doors open. I feared what I'd find.

Lexa was who I saw first, on the floor in her nightgown as if she'd just gotten out of bed, leaning back on her hands and trembling so much I thought she'd shatter.

"Lexa!" I rushed to her side, kneeling down with worry. "What is it? What's wrong?"

In all my life, I'd never seen her afraid, not like this, and certainly not enough to elicit a scream like she had. What could it be?

I followed her tear-filled gaze, noticing a box at the foot of her bed. Reluctantly, I let go of her and approached the box, and it was a sight I'd never forget.

There sat Costia'a head, lifeless eyes forced open and fresh blood still staining her beheaded neck.

My hand came to my mouth immediately and I looked away, afraid I'd throw up if I didn't. I caught the glaring symbol on the inside of the box though – the symbol of Azgeda, Lexa's biggest enemy – and knew who was responsible.

The guards were just as taken aback as I was, freezing by the door when they noticed the head. Lexa's sobs pulled me from my momentary shock and I immediately looked to the guards with as much confidence as I could muster. They couldn't see their Commander falter like this, not if I could help it.

"What are you waiting for?!" I shouted at them. "Remove this now!" As they jumped at my words, and eventually into action, I continued, "And find out who broke in here last night! Up the security!"

They nodded frantically, carefully taking the box out of there and leaving Lexa and I alone. I returned to her side, where she was still staring at the spot where the box was, glassy eyes widened with horror.

"Lexa, I'm sorry," I said, pulling her in for a hug, hating the way she trembled. "I'm so sorry."

Her sobs were silenced in my shirt and she clutched me so tightly I was sure I'd have bruises, but I didn't care. I was still in utter shock, unable to believe Costia was dead at the hands of Azgeda. I knew we'd had tension with them for a while now, all because their queen didn't trust Lexa in power, but I never thought they'd stoop this low.

Costia deserved better... so did Lexa.

—

She wasn't the same after that. I couldn't blame her. Finding someone you loved, beheaded, at the foot of your bed? When you'd only just kissed them goodnight the night before? It was traumatising. Hell, it still haunted me!

We held a funeral, but Lexa didn't shed another tear after the morning she found her. She was much quieter, much more closed off, as if numb to the whole situation. Even when I visited her after the funeral, concerned for her well-being, she told me to leave. I didn't want to, but maybe space was what she needed, so I obeyed.

There were no leads on how the box was delivered, nor who delivered it. The guards were still searching, making enquiries, but it seemed futile. Horrifyingly enough, Costia's body was never found, so we could only burn the head. It was disgusting, the emotional warfare Azgeda were playing on Lexa.

Costia had nothing to do with any of this, she'd only been unfortunate enough to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. And it was something Lexa never forgave herself for.

The girl I'd come to know as easygoing and full of life was gone, completely replaced by this shell of a person. At first, she was isolating herself from everyone, only throwing herself into her duties and responsibilities as Heda. It took a long several months for her to fully grieve Costia, for her to finally open up to me again, but she wasn't the same.

I couldn't recall the last time I'd seen her smile or laugh. It was as if her happiness had died with Costia and I understood why, but I hated seeing her like that.

We were in archery practice one day, the two of us sometimes training together like old times. I was growing tired, looking forward to when it would end so we could do something a little more fun.

"Do you wanna go for a swim after this?" I asked her, the idea coming to me at that moment. "In the lake, like we used to?"

She didn't spare a glance my way as she lined up her next shot. "I have more important matters to attend to, Y/N."

"C'mon, it'll be fun," I said encouragingly as she let the arrow fly through the air, finding the centre of the target with ease. "It's warm out and the lake will be refreshing."

"No," she said simply, going to collect her arrow.

I sighed quietly, watching her with a concerned gaze. Gently, I spoke, "Look, I know it's been hard, but I'm here for you and I think that, maybe, not working as hard might make this–"

"What?" she interrupted harshly, finally looking at me, though with a fiery glare. I jumped at volume of her voice, not expecting it. "Easier? How? How can it be easier when Azgeda are plotting to overthrow me every single day? How will a dip in the lake fix that?!"

I swallowed awkwardly, unsure what to say. It felt stupid now.

"We're not kids anymore," she reminded me with a sneer.

I frowned. "I know. Sorry. I don't mean–"

"You're forgiven," she cut me off, looking away with a clenched jaw. "End of discussion."

I chewed on the inside of my cheek as she returned to her stance before the target, lining up another shot. And just like that, we were back to archery.

—

21 years old...

It was supposed to be a simple rescue mission. In and out of Azgeda's prison camps, rescuing our people and leaving before they'd even notice.

But everything went wrong when they caught us escaping.

Arrows were flying, swords were wielded and, in the midst of chaos, I saw that a few of our own were struck down. We needed to leave, fast.

Those of us who could mounted their horses, prisoners with them, and raced out of there whilst a few stayed back to buy us time. Lexa was one of them, mounting her horse and taking a few of Azgeda's soldiers out on the way. I was close behind, the last of our party to leave, and pushed my horse as fast as I could. Unfortunately for me, before I could even make it out of the snowy lands of Azgeda's territory, a loose arrow caught my horse's front leg and I went flying forward as a result.

The wind was knocked from me as I landed face first in the snow, the cold already seeping through my clothes and my whole body aching from the fall. But I couldn't stay put for long, already hearing someone on my tail.

It took me a lot of effort to push myself off the ground, finding my sword which had luckily not impaled me on the fall. As soon as I turned around, I saw one of the Azgeda prison guards hurtling towards me, his own sword raised as he let out a battle cry. I held my ground, grip tightening on my sword, and immediately blocked his swing as he came at me.

Luckily for me, my sword fighting had much improved over the years, mostly due to Lexa's constant need for training, and it aided me in this fight as I blocked every swing from my opponent. He was large and strong, albeit slow, so at my best opportunity, I parried his swing and used the power of it to go around him, stabbing him through the back.

A sigh of relief escaped my lips as I yanked my sword out, watching him collapse in the snow. My success was short lived however, as I heard barking from behind me and turned around a second too late. A wild dog – one of the ones the Azgeda army trained for battle – raced through the trees and leapt on me, going straight for my leg.

I screamed as its sharp teeth sunk right into my calf, at the orders of its owner who was approaching us but only watching as I struggled. Instinctively, I swung my sword, but the dog was merely inconvenienced, moving back to bark at me before leaping at me again. This time, I was knocked backwards into the snow, dropping my sword. It reattached its teeth to my leg, piercing flesh and bone and oblivious to my weak attempts at kicking it away. I felt like I couldn't breathe, the pain too strong to even acknowledge.

Suddenly, an arrow flew through the air, landing right in the dog's head and killing it instantly. It didn't matter to me though – my leg felt like it was in tatters and I was starting to see spots in my vision. Not even the cold of the snow was a bother to me anymore – I could have been dipped in fire at that moment and known no difference.

"Y/N!" someone shouted after me.

My people had returned, dismounting their horses as they fought off the Azgeda stragglers, including that wretched dog's owner.

Lexa was with them, having come back to my aid. She let her people deal with the remaining Azgeda soldiers, instead coming to my side with a concerned look. Her eyes glanced between me and my leg and, judging from her expression, it wasn't great.

"I need help over here!" she yelled to her solders.

Two members of our party rushed to my side, attempting to carry me, but even the slightest bit of movement had me screeching in agony.

"Be gentle!" Lexa ordered, and they were suddenly less rough. She took my hand, squeezing it gently. "You're gonna be okay. We're going home."

All I could manage was a weak nod, tears burning my eyes.

We must have made it back to Polis, though I couldn't be sure it was without disruption as I passed out not long after they placed me on a horse.

When I awoke, I recognised the healer's room at the Tower, though it felt strange being the one in the bed rather than the healer. I couldn't remember why I was here, still in a daze, and then I heard a sigh of relief and looked to my right to see Lexa standing up, touching my cheek with relief.

It was unusual seeing the tears down her cheeks and her red, puffy eyes staring down at me. She hadn't cried this much since Costia died years ago. Was I hurt that bad?

"What happened?" I asked tiredly, not quite adjusting to the aches and pains in my body.

"I'm sorry, Y/N," she said with a watery voice. "I should've got to you sooner."

Got to me sooner...?

And then it came back to me. Our people. Azgeda. The dog. My leg.

My eyes widened as I put Lexa's words together with what I remembered and then I was quick to try and sit up to see if my leg was okay, but Lexa tried to stop me.

"Y/N, just wait–"

"Let go!" I shouted, shoving her off long enough to finally see what I feared.

My lower left leg was gone. All that remained was a bloody, bandaged stump, ending at my knee. I could barely believe what I was looking at, eyes watering at the sight.

"It was the only way," she said regretfully. "It was badly infected and the bites were too deep. They couldn't save it."

Her words went in one ear and out the other. All I could see was the spot where my leg used to be.

"It's gone," I whispered, voice trembling.

Her hand rested on my shoulder gently. "Y/N..."

I touched my knee and then the spot after it, where my calf should've been. And then I felt something break inside of me and the tears finally fell.

Lexa sat beside me, pulling me into her chest and holding me tightly. "It's okay. You're okay. I'm here."

But it wasn't okay, was it? Nothing was okay.

—

The next few days were some of the hardest I'd endured.

Lexa stayed by my side the whole time, only leaving to bring me food or see the healers looking after me. I couldn't bear to look at her, nor my father, who stopped by regularly too.

Everything was so futile to me. Without my leg, I would never walk the same again. And how would I continue to be a combat medic if I couldn't even stand? How could I work at Lexa's side? I was useless. And I couldn't stand it.

My feelings left me in a pit of depression, my appetite gone and my will to recover completely absent. I couldn't see a future where I'd feel like myself again, and no matter who was there to support me, I refused their help.

I was sulking yet again, staring at the wall and soaking in my own misery since there was nothing else to do. Lexa had left to get me some food and, truthfully, I was glad. Her constant worrying and fretting at my side was doing nothing to help.

The logical part of me was grateful she cared, but the emotional part won over and I seriously hated having her around right now, not when I couldn't think straight about anything other than my missing leg.

My momentary peace was interrupted when Lexa returned, tray of food in hand which she set on the table beside my bed.

"It's time to eat something, Y/N," she said softly, hand resting on my hand, but I snatched it away.

Ignoring her, I continued to stare at the wall ahead, void of feeling.

"Y/N, please, you have to eat," she said, unfazed by my mood.

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes as I purposely looked to the left, away from her, hoping she'd get the hint. Of course, she didn't.

"Don't be like that," she said, a little sterner this time, and it infuriated me because why couldn't I be like that? Who was she to tell me otherwise?

"I can do what I want," I snapped at her with a glare. "I'm not hungry, so just leave me alone already."

Her lips twitched into a slight frown, but she didn't move. "You're not going to get better if you don't eat," she said firmly.

"Get the damn hint and go away! I don't need your help!" I said bitterly.

She swallowed hard, green eyes flickering between mine with an unreadable expression, before leaving the room. I glared a hole into the space where she left, eyes burning with tears, and was overcome by an immediate guilt.

It was easier to push her away now, as much as it hurt to do so. At least this way she wouldn't notice how much of a burden I would become. Cripples had no place working under the Commander, best friend or not. And I wasn't sure I could handle being fazed out by Lexa in time.

Despite how awful the whole situation was, I couldn't bring it in myself to face her. She tried to return after my outburst, but I made sure Nyko refused her entry. I was surprised it worked, considering she was the Commander and could do whatever she wanted. She still found her way back in over the course of the next week, but I continued to ignore her, wanting her to lose interest on her own and stop visiting me.

I should have known trying to get Lexa to do anything was impossible though, as when she showed up once more, ignoring my request through Nyko to leave me alone, she had a whole speech prepared.

"I said I didn't want to see you,"  I mumbled tiredly upon noticing her walk in without warning.

She ignored me and stopped by my bed. "You don't get to request that."

I rolled my eyes, my usual self-deprecating attitude written all over my face. But unlike the past few weeks, she wasn't accepting it anymore.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" she suddenly shouted, surprising me.

I finally looked to her, surprised to see her shooting me a fiery glare.

"I almost lost you, don't you see that?" she continued, giving me no chance to respond. "I watched you bleed all over the bed as they assessed the damage. Watched as you came to and from consciousness, as they cut off your leg. They thought you were going to die from the blood loss. And now you're okay and what? You're pushing me away?! For what? Pride?!"

I pressed my lips together, tensing my jaw, face hot with shame and self-pity.

"Well, I refuse," she said decisively. "I'm staying and you can't get rid of me. No matter how many times you try to tell Nyko."

Even as I closed my eyes, I could feel tears welling up. Why was she so stubborn?

Her voice cracked as she continued, "They're moving you back to your room tomorrow."

I looked away, unsure what to say, and then she took my hand between hers and I couldn't bring it in myself to pull away. Admittedly, I craved the comfort, though I didn't deserve it. Not after how I'd treated her.

"I'm not leaving your side," she repeated, less angry and more concerned.

It only reminded me why I was acting like this in the first place.

"For now," I said, voice hoarse.

She blinked. "What?"

Narrowing my eyes, I finally looked to her, speaking more clearly. "For now. You'll be here for now and then you'll get busy with Heda responsibilities, and then you'll realise I can't work with you anymore because I can't even walk. And then you'll get busier and busier and realise I'm just a damned burden and then you'll leave. And I won't blame you one bit, but it'll happen."

Her expression softened. "How can you say that?"

Embarrassed, I let go of her hand and wiped away a stray tear, looking away. "Because it's true. We're not kids anymore, remember? You don't owe me a thing."

"You're such a fool."

I scoffed, crossing my arms. How could she say that when she'd spent the last few years an emotionless wreck because of Costia's death, only ever putting her job first?

"No, you are," she disagreed. "You think I'd just push you away like that?"

"Yes," I said simply, looking down at my bed covers. "Love is weakness. Isn't that what you've been saying?"

"I thought that," she admitted, "but it's not. Not with you."

I rolled my eyes.

"I thought I lost you and I didn't," she said gently, considerately. "That's worth something. Because..." She paused, hesitant, then continued, "...because I'm in love with you."

She said it so nonchalantly that I had to truly digest her words, and even then I couldn't believe them.

With disbelief, I glanced at her. "What?"

She was trembling slightly, surprising me, and began to nod. Her eyes were glassy as they met mine. "I am. I can't lose you too."

For a moment, I saw the old Lexa, the one who I'd known most of my life, before Azgeda ruined her, and it broke my heart.

"Lexa...," I started, but didn't know what to say.

"You're not a burden," she told me with certainty. "Those one love never are."

I struggled to find words, heart beating exceptionally fast as she maintained eye contact. She loved me? After all this time, the girl I fell in love with loved me too? What?

"Please don't say I've ruined everything," she whispered, hopeless.

Remembering to move, I quickly shook my head, though my mind was still reeling. "You haven't. You–"

She cut me off with a kiss, pressing her lips to mine eagerly. She kissed me like she'd been waiting to forever, hands curling around my face and nose brushing against mine as she tilted her head to the side. I kissed her back, melting into her with ease and acutely aware of how perfect she felt against me.

I still couldn't catch up to what was happening, not even as she pulled back slightly, breathless and meeting my gaze. She didn't speak, as if waiting for my reaction before she could do anything.

"Are you sure?" was all I could say, stunned.

She nodded slowly.

I licked my lips. "Good. Because I'm in love with you too, Lexa."

Her lips curved into a small smile, eyes darting between mine, before she kissed me again.

[konigsblog]

That mlmxreader blog also keeps claiming that you're sending your followers to go attack them and send death threats. They do a lot of arguing that your dark fic is not real dark fic and that you're purposely trying to trigger and retraumatise them - is what I gathered looking at a couple posts...

I think that for one, there are definitely writers who do romanticise some topics unhealthily with things such as rape/assault/torture, but I don't think you're one of those people? Like you frequently tag and keep stating that what you're writing is fiction, it's fantasy.

On that note, they keep trying to argue that CNC is the more "moral" kink to be writing vs. rape. I honestly think that rape fantasy is something people do fantasize about and can sometimes just not be CNC (bc they keep trying to pin it back to that kink). It's the fact that there's no established relationship and discussion like in most BDSM pairings where they talk about rape play. At the end of the day, you tag your works properly. I don't see much issue with writing what you want when you make sure to tag (which you do!) and are aware the subject you're writing about and its usual connotations (which you're also aware!). People can be mad and uncomfortable, but at the end of the day it's them who chose to keep talking about it. I think people need to get used to being uncomfortable on the internet. This is not a new concept and nobody here is a "hero" for anything.

Sorry I just paraphased some posts and asks with some of my own thoughts on it!

i mean, my content is supposed to be dark, it's dark content for a reason, and i'm not describing these characters to be standard; i'm writing them manipulative, vindictive, depraved, ect. i do appreciate you, anon, as you weren't rude, and instead polite. i appreciate it, my dear! 💗

i don't really care about this whole thing, but something i have never said was to send death threats. now, we don't know if they're lying – they could be – but, if they aren't, stop. i didn't tell anyone to send death threats, because i don't condone that. aside from death threats and mocking someone's trauma, i seriously don't care what you want to do. whether you don't block them, block them, whatever, they've made multiple posts directly insulting me in weird ass ways, so i couldn't really care about their immature opinion.

i'd like to point out something they said though, kinda funny, considering they've mentioned me multiple times outside of their callout post. they said they made ONE post about me with examples, that would be their callout post. but, they're not counting how they're talking about me in response to anons, or how they're mentioning me in their hashtags. it's childish. yes, you 100% have the right to not enjoy a certain kink/coping mechanism (because funnily enough, people use different ways to copes) but it's immature to name people, talk about how what i'm doing is "disgusting" or how i'm a "vile cretin" (like what lmfao 😭)

here's some screenshots of what i'm talking about when i say they've even insulted me, or made comments. this is 4/11 screenshots.

and comparing my supporters to an iof soldier... 😬 wtf is wrong with you? that's disgusting.

now, if anyone sends this to @mlmxreader, go ahead and let them know that they're not the centre of the world, them multiple posts taking about me and insulting me is immature on their end.

[skunkes]

some recent thoughts !

I am NOT asking for "solutions" to anything brought up here. This is my disclaimer because for some reason there's ppl here who get really mad when I don't follow their unsolicited advice 😭 I'm simply thinking out loud...

-

Anyway. Right now finding a job doesn't seem feasible even though I'm trying to do it and having a friend support and guide me, but regardless, I'm thinking ahead and getting nervous because I don't think anybody believes I can Make It and Survive if i move out. Including myself.

Its a weird feeling of like. I don't know. I want to move out, and I'd try my hardest to make it work of course, but my family's reaction to the thought of it is making me so nervous. Like. As if I'm being Stupid for thinking I can. And so I keep being torn about it again.

Like what if I'm being insanely naïve in thinking I could ever move out and live alone and keep myself alive. Funnily enough this fear is ENHANCED by the fact that I've never been allowed to have many life experiences. I know nothing. What makes me think I can do this? I don't know. I dont think its going to be a walk in the park at all but what if it's even harder than expected. And now I have egg on my face bc I was so desperate to leave and ended up having a rude awakening to the reality of things, not knowing how the Real World works. Grass is greener and all that.

It just makes me feel really really dumb for wanting it. And more nervous about pushing for it and fully focusing on making it happen. I cant fully commit because I dont knowww. I could find a well paying job out of town tomorrow and I'd start panicking because do I really want this? What if I'm making the wrong decision? What if everyone is shaking their heads and ready to watch me fail. I want change. I hate change. I fear change.

(the other thing that's making me nervous is, well, I am 26 and I do want my life to begin and want my own space and life and routine, social interactions, ability to transition and make my own choices, and space for hobbies etc but I fear that decades from now I'll still be like I should not have rushed to leave...! Spent as much time as possible with everyone under the same roof ! + This safety net will not be here forever. Though I recognize that this is 100% caused by me having parents that are. older than the parents of most people I know. I was always going to have less time. And unfortunately this is immutable. But still very hard to mentally deal with. Guilt.)

[winterflowersftw]

Blue Lock characters as Taylor Swift songs + explanation

Notes: Hi guys, so this was another random idea I so...here I am, I guess? But yea do tell me if you guys disagree with any of the song choices here lmao. Would love to hear from you guys

ISAGI YOICHI

"I laid the groundwork and then, just like clockwork

The dominoes cascaded in a line

What if I told you I'm a mastermind?"

And

"If you fail to plan, you plan to fail

Strategy sets the scene for the tale"

And

"Of a chain reaction of countermoves

To assess the equation of you

Checkmate, I couldn't lose."

My boy Isagi came into the Blue Lock system as the second last player and crept his way to the top. He's literally the mastermind pulling the pieces together and winning matches. It's really amazing how he had no ability tha made him stand out much except his brain and that was enough for him.

So yea this is HIS song.

BACHIRA MEGURU

"I never miss a beat

I'm lightnin' on my feet"

And

"I'm dancin' on my own (dancin' on my own)

I make the moves up as I go (moves up as I go)

But I keep cruisin'

Can't stop, won't stop groovin'

It's like I got this music in my mind

Sayin' it's gonna be alright"

The song 100% represents Bachira' childish, carefree and happy-to-go personality and some of the lyrics (which I put above) totally show his abilities like cmon. 😭

Okay so the first two lines are like about his dribbling ability, right? And even in the next para the top lines are like how he's not following a rhythm and is doing whatever he wants to and THAT IS SOMETHING HE DOES IN THE NEL. (Sorry got too excited)

And the last two lines are about the "monster" he had, which existed in his mind. It was very relevant in the first selection.

NAGI SEISHIRO

"And I'm just getting color back into my face

I'm just mad as hell cause I loved this place

For so long, London

Had a good run

A moment of warm sun"

This is VERY specific but I do think this fits really well during the second selection when Nagi chooses to go with Isagi and leaves Reo. Nagi actually stops being the lazy-genius he had been until episode 10 of the anime which has the match between Team V and Team Z where has an awakening (hence the "getting color back into his face" lyric) and he is gaining a passion for football which he never thought someone like him could even have. In Episode Nagi, even Reo acknowledges that the one who made Nagi put in actual efforts in a football match (which he had never done before) was Isagi and not him. Isagi was the reason of Nagi's awakening. And Reo was so sad that he was not the reason.

And right after his awakening, he decides to leave Reo because now he actually wants to improve and has a goal: To beat Isagi. And for that he has to leave Reo. So...yeah.

ITOSHI RIN

"And you call me up again just to break me like a promise

So casually cruel in the name of being honest"

And

"Time won't fly, it's like I'm paralyzed by it

I'd like to be my old self again

But I'm still trying to find it"

And

"You kept me like a secret, but I kept you like an oath"

Okay again this one is also very specific just like Nagi's but i think this song completely represents Rin's relationship with his brother, Sae. Beating Sae is the only reason we have been given for whatever he does.

When we first see Rin at the start of the second selection, one of the first things he says is how he has to beat his brother and that's basically the bane of his existence.

And in between the confrontation between the brothers when Sae comes home from Spain and thenU20 VS Blue Lock Eleven match; a year has passed and Rin's feeling fir his brother is EXACTLY the same. (Hence the second para)

Also we can notice this during the Itoshi brothers' flashback, Sae had always been the way he is at this point since childhood. But Rin was different, he was a happy and naive kid. But that's gone now. Also how after the U20 VS the Blue Lock Eleven match when Sae comes to Rin, and Rin (and us, the audience) think that Sae is going to praise Rin who had just been in his berserk mode before; the expression change on Rin's face is so evident and heartbreaking. His expression is almost the same one he had when he was a little kid. So yeah, its very heartbreaking when Sae praises Isagi and not him when Rin has been craving for his validation for a longggg time.

Notes part 2: This took me a lot of time to wrote so please don't let this flop 😭🤞

[nuatthebeach]

I’ve noticed in your posts you always mention Harry’s endgame is Ginny or no one, but you’ve never mention it the other way around? I’ve always thought those two loved each other equally and they were each other’s endgames in every universe. Do you believe Ginny doesn’t love Harry as much as he loves her? Or that his love isn’t enough for her? I don’t think anyone could love, support, or make Ginny Weasley as happy as Harry Potter could, and I don’t think any man or women could make her feel the way Harry could, and vice versa.

hahah, i do do that a lot, don't i

the following is my opinion, and my opinion only:

to your point, yes, i totally 100% believe that ginny loves harry as much as he loves her. to be explicit, in canon, it is harry or no one for ginny. they have just gone through hell and back for each other that, personally, i just do not see them even considering being with anybody else after the war. the series ended in a way that implied that harry's main priority was going to be centered around building something with ginny, and judging by the fact that ginny never said she was going to wait for him, there's no canon evidence to suggest that she didn't wait in her 6th year (though, obviously, there were more pressing matters at the time.)

to me, it was always inevitable that they would fall back together. they would, of course, have many problems to deal with (harry's communication issues, ginny's fresh grief, harry coming to terms with ginny's very dark circumstances, ginny's sense of self-preservation, amongst so many other things that i think @whinlatter's Beasts does a phenomenal job of tackling, and i can't wait to read more. (those dang eggcups goddamnit 😭.)

now why do i talk more about harry loving ginny than vice versa? frankly because fandom seems adamant on proving just the opposite. and i absolutely refuse to give an inch about it. at risk of pissing everyone off, i'm also more likely to read ginny/other, if not for any other reason than to spite the haters. plus, ginny's love life is so interesting; if you think about it, she really "dated" all tropes of men: the toxic guy (tom riddle, if you count intimacy as not just romantic), the "nice guy" (michael corner), and the guy who's just generally a great person but not the one for ginny (dean thomas). how could you not want to read about it? and it's so beautiful, thinking that after all of that, she finds her way back to harry.

and...(tw) harsh truth alert... 🚨

honestly? truthfully? there just is more canonical evidence of harry caring about ginny. (again, this does NOT mean that i'm saying that harry loves ginny more than ginny loves harry.)

why? because unlike ginny, we can actually see inside harry's head. we know for a fact he thinks of her as his greatest source of comfort from book six. we know for a fact he thinks of her like family since book seven. we know for a fact that she is his last thought before he freakin' dies. we do NOT know for fact that ginny thinks these things because we cannot see inside her head. while ginny's feelings for harry are an interpretation (a heavily evidence-based one for sure, duh, i'd be stupid not to think that), harry's feelings for ginny are just...reality.

it's like arguing evolution vs gravity. one is a theory, and the other is legitimately a law.

though you'll still have people argue that neither are true, and...well. welcome to the harry potter fandom.

[honeythekidsarealright]

Hiiii. I lately realized that I'm bi. A girl in my college was my gay-awakening. We only have one same subject every other semester. She's sweet. She sings and plays a handful of instruments [I stalked her youtube😭].

It all started when I seemed to notice her in that class and that we made an eye contact everytime we were in the same room. I rarely look people in the eye but when I felt her eyes, I just glanced for a mini-second too. She was just acknowledging me and so I acknowledged her right back. This happened a year ago [2nd sem]. I passed it off as a mere "curiosity" and guys and gays, IT IS NEVER CURIOSITY.

Now in the 4th SEM, I forgot it all but I would recognize and highlight her out of the crowd whenever I'd pass my her in a corridoor. I only saw her once in the class for the 4th sem, cause I bunked a lot of it, where we again made an eye-contact. And a few days later, out of the blue, it dawned upon me when I found myself waiting for yet another eye-contact. And I realize that I may have been suppressing all of it.

Now how do I approach her?I know she's sweet but she seems unapproachable to me [im not friends with her friends. They are not the kind of people I would be friends with or maybe I would Idk cause I never make friends. Plus she's cool]. I think that she'll get angry once she learns of my crush idk why i think that [I've always thought so about all my crushes] And also she belongs to the "cool" people group ya know the fun ones. I, on the other hand, don't belong to any group though there are a couple folks I spend my time with. I'm rather introverted (atleast until you get to know me which most people don't because I'm too closed off and apparently have an rbf).

I cannot believe we managed to exist in the same age, same side of the world, hell the same darn college and yet I feel so far away, flung into a different plane of existence, like I can never feel her heart beat against mine or her fingers intertwined in mine like I cannot hold her when all that I want is to hold her, to hold her so close I can feel her blood run through her veins and her tumultuous breath against my ear.

hi! honestly, my advice to you would be to just talk to her. from your ask, i've gathered that you guys share a class together, and that is the perfect opportunity, in my opinion, to strike up a conversation with her and get to know her. i know it might be scary, especially because you'll be stepping out of your comfort zone a bit, but you'll never know if she's interested in you if all you do is admire her from a distance (remember, you miss 100% of the shots you don't take). it's clear that she's noticed you almost as much as you've noticed her, and like you said, even though you don't know her friends, she seems like a sweet person.... so go for it. don't let the fear of rejection stop you from experiencing something that could be great.

i hope i've been able to help, even if it's just a little bit, and if you have any follow-ups, feel free to leave another ask. good luck :)

[these-emo-thoughts]

Pit Babe Anniversary Rewatch! Episode 1!

I can't even begin to describe how happy I am to be rewatching one of my favourite shows and sharing in the joy with others 🥹 Below are my thoughts of the episode as I watched it, I'm trying not to simp so much for the show and the actors entirely, but I think I failed in that department 🤣

So, in the words of Speed of Love - Let's go! Let's go, let's go, let's go! 🙌

Theme song is still an absolute banger and the clips for the intro are fan-fucking-tastic ahhhhh I'm so excited!!

Hello, old friends 🥹 Yes, even you Winner, lol.

ESPECIALLY YOU WAY 🖤

(Why is it fitting to me that Way is reported to have a fabulous record for the racing season? Is it because he's played by the fabulous Nut Supanut? Yeah, probably 🤣)

Thank you Alan for the omegaverse commentary 🙏

Vroom vroom

Babe is so freaking beautiful, ugh

Ohhh, that lil fist-bump between Babe and Way when Babe comes out of his 'concentration'... my heart is already like, hurting, lol

HELLO CHARLIE! Look at you in your suspicious lil get-up, creeping in the corner, lol

Actual racing in the racing omegaverse show - I swear I didn't forget, lol

Sonic in his coat 😍

Okay but Dean being part of the team and being so supportive... my boy 😭

The uncle-being-single bashing began really early didn't it 🤣

OKAY CAN BABE AND WAY STOP BEING SO CUTE TOGETHER???

One of my favourite things in any BL is one character pinning another one against the wall and keeping them in place by holding their arms. What I like about Babe doing this to Charlie is that cute lil smile Charlie gives Babe when he turns around after his face-mask is removed 🥹

I get Babe, Charlie's request for a car is a weird one, I'd be confused too LOL

I LOVE how smug Babe looks, I bet $100 he did NOT think that Charlie would take his bait which is why he's egging him on so much

But damn, Charlie can give back just as well 👀

OKAY BUT Charlie hesitantly trying to kiss Babe on the lips but Babe turning to the side so he gets a cheek instead and then shrugging like "idk" is just perfection

And when Babe realises that Charlie doesn't have an alpha scent and then smiles like he's won the lottery and then gets super into it? Amazing.

North pls you are my favourite social media vlogger, I love you LOL

Lmao I would hate to be in Charlie's position, with everyone betting how long I'd last with the great Pit Babe. And ofc, Way starts the betting LOL

HERE HE IS, THE WORLD'S BIGGEST LOSER, WINNER, COMING TO STEAL THE SHOW SPOIL THE PARTY

AGAIN, I WOULD HATE TO BE CHARLIE RN LMAO

Love that Winner has an entourage cheering him on for some reason, he's so smug too about winning the first round (bb boy, you're not winning much else this series so enjoy while it lasts LOL)

The romantic break with Charlie and Babe looking at each other while Babe is doing doughnuts has me hollering

Idk how Babe won the drifting when there were two rounds and he and Winner each won one, but CONGRATS BABE

And congrats Charlie for not being Winner's new plaything, lol

It really does feel like Babe has never met a person like Charlie before doesn't it? Charlie from the get-go makes it clear he doesn't want to take advantage and is fine with Babe saying no to not staying over to sleep. Pavel's subtle acting really makes it seem as though Babe is mildly surprised, imo

KENTA BABY BOY, HELLO, I MISSED YOU AND YOUR CREEPING ASS 😭

TONY!

Alan in a singlet top 🥵

There's a lot of vroom vroom in this episode 🏎️

Wise uncle Alan giving such great words of advice to Way about his feelings for Babe too bad he doesn't FOLLOW IT

Charlie, like, transforms when he's doing a sex scene with Babe. His eyes, his expression, it's all so seductive

The "no kissing" trope, ugh, yes (made even better with the way Babe is SQUISHING Charlie's cheeks)

I'll still... never get over the design of this house 😭 or the fact that it was used as the restaurant for This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans LOL

Charlie's little "bye bye!" is so cute

Babe's mood swings, imma get whiplash, Charlie is god's strongest soldier for weathering that storm lol

Charlie the maid without the uniform 🤣

I'm assuming this was a slight timeskip and was not just the next day because of how Charlie says they've already had "test drives" many times by now lol

They're already so domestic, I can't-

The "bye bye" again, so CUTE 😭

The father (Alan), son (Babe), and holy spirit (Way) of X-Hunter LOL

From the very BEGINNING Way is planting the seeds of Charlie being sus, set up for us to believe it's because of his not-so secret feelings for Babe - a red herring if I ever saw, and done so well

God, even when Charlie is waving "bye bye" to Way it's cute. I don't ever remember him being this adorable in my first watch, but I'm smitten now 🤣

Charlie not getting jealous that Babe checked out another man and instead saying "I don't know why you found me special" 😔

BUT IT'S SO CUTE HOW BABE TALKS TO CHARLIE HERE AJSFALFJSL, they look so HAPPY!!

Man, I know he's the absolute worst kind of villain, but I love S Vorarit so much, lol

AHHHH the phone call! Innocent lil Charlie isn't so innocent after all!

Ep 2 preview 👀

KIM! WELCOME!!

Way looks so much like a good friend in the preview: "keep an eye on Charlie", bc we just saw from that phone call we might not be able to trust him 👀

And ofc the iconic behind the scenes that Change so generously gives us (more pls 🤣)

Such a great first episode, very much enjoyed the rewatch, hopefully will get to Ep 2 tonight as well (BABY BOY JEFF WAS NOT IN EPISODE 1 AT ALL 😭)

[agenderpunked]

just finished lost. will not be recovering, ever, me thinks...

I'M GONNA RAMBLE BECAUSE WHAT WAS THAAAAT OUUUUUGH I DIDN'T SEE ANY OTHER WAY FOR IT ALL TO END BUT THE FACT THAT IT *IS* WHAT THEY WENT WITH hURTS

I have so many thoughts and many of them are spoilers so if you haven't watched Lost (2004) stop reading this and go watch it instead.

- Jack dying in the same place he started. The cinematography and spiritual implications of making a trek back to the beginning and finally closing his eyes... DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON VINCENT LYING DOWN NEXT TO HIM I CRIIIIIIIIIIIED. THE DOG KNOWS "LIVE TOGETHER OR DIE ALONE" AND HE MAKES SURE JACK DOESN'T DIE ALONE IM IN SHAMBLESSSSS DONT TALK TO ME

- rose and bernard. i care you so bad. i want a bob ross energy survival show spin off that just follows them making their cabin and garden and traps and such and exploring the area around their cabin. Unproblematic favs, truly. THE FACT NO ONE BELIEVED ROSE WHEN SHE SAID SHE KNEW HER HUSBAND WAS ALIVE???? who visited you and told you that? are you just that faithful??? Did that hope, faith, and love protect both of you from dying on the island before you found each other??

BC ALSO. sorry but i view faith as energy, and when you focus and devote that energy to something it becomes concentrated, and what do our brains run on? electricity. what is everything about Lost about? electromagnetism. What can spirits fuck with? electromagnetic frequencies. That energy can be used to attract what you're searching for. Rose is such a necessary character ESPECIALLY for Jack's development because of how she displays such radical acceptance when she knows there are things she cannot change, ie. cancer, being trapped on the island, being surrounded by danger, and focuses instead on what she can, confirming her husband's status, creating an environment that feels safe, and enjoying the time she has left with the people she loves.

- Boone and Shannon getting into a bar fight at the end??? Boone walking up to Hurley and chatting??? Boone and Shannon are severely underrated characters in my opinion, and it's 100% from the emotionally incestuous aspects of them, which is a shame because I truly believe they are one of the most realistic depictions of relationships like that that I've seen in media. I didn't immediately like Boone. I thought he was an asshole because the show presents Shannon and Boone to you as they would an unhappy romantic relationship, but they never confirm it, even joke about it, to the point I nearly immediately realized 'They're not dating at all. They're siblings that were emotionally neglected by their parents and are codependent as all hell.'

Watching further, I was so scared to think I'd find Boone slander all up and down in the fandom while Shannon gets victimized and absolved of her fucked up actions, because of the way we immediately see Boone treat her without the context for understanding their relationship and that Boone was only on 815 to bail her out of another abusive relationship. But what I actually got from the fandom was NOTHING. ABOUT EITHER OF THEM!!!!

HOW ARE WE NOT TALKING ABOUT BOONE HALLUCINATING SHANNONS DEATH AND ADMITTING THAT HE WAS UTTERLY RELIEVED 😭😭😭 IM GONNA BLOW MYSELF UP ABOUT IT GOOD GOD.

The fact that Shannon also does find a potentially healthy relationship with Sayid, and that Sayid can allow himself to feel and care for someone and have gentle and tender moments in such a hostile environment while serving as the groups main mercenary, and make her feel safe, regardless of her clearly morally skewed history of dating. Sayid has morals, and he wants to stick to them, but he's been put in environments that do not allow him to adhere to that. He has restraint, and emotional intelligence. The glimpse we get into Shannon's life shows she hasn't been around men of those qualities, at least recently, save for Boone, who even then, doesn't compare next to Sayid. Imagining how Shannon would have felt about Sayid being brought back in the temple and seeing how extremely empty and different he is 😟

- Thinking about the general implications of what the island is, as well... Did they ever survive the initial crash? When they leave the island, were they alive? or was it merely an illusion of life? Is death on the island equivalent to someone accepting that they're dead and moving on for realsies? Is the island symbolizing purgatory? The themes of duality and shadows and light and twins are also not lost on me and rank this media even higher because these were not on my bingo card or prior knowledge of the show and they are damn near a critical criteria for intriguing me and getting me into a media.

Are the souls whispering in the forest of the island trapped there? Michael says they can't move on, but is it a personal choice grappling with what they did? Or is it related to actions done after death, while passing through purgatory, that decides whether you are bound to a place or able to move freely???

Oooooooough.....

[cfr749]

I love your 6x04 spec about Lucy's camera being broken and her being investigated! You should totally write a fic about that if you're inspired ✨️

hi anon - thanks for the ask!

So @literali1110 pointed out to me that there were footage from Lucy's camera after the fall, so doesn't look like this is the route they'll go 😂

I do keep circling back on how hesitant Angela and Nyla looked when Lucy made her suggestion, and it makes me wonder if they may end up questioning whether protocol was followed or something instead? Or maybe Lucy will simply struggle with her own feelings of guilt around ending up in that situation because she was trying to prove herself?

I am glad that there's not really any ambiguity about whether she had to take the shot and whether the guy was 100% guilty, because I think it would destroy Lucy if those things were in question.

I'm definitely feeling some angsty inspiration from Lucy's struggle this season; jury's still out on whether it ever becomes anything more than random sentences in my notes app.

Regardless, I'm gonna hijack this ask to ramble a little bit on why I'm actually okay with the choices they've made and the story they are telling for Lucy this season so far. Like a lot of people, I hate seeing Lucy going through a hard time and of course I want to see her be supported. Give me the scene with Tim in the hospital a million times over; I'll never get tired of seeing that she is valued and loved by the people in her life. We honestly haven't gotten enough of that for literal years.

We've seen Lucy go through so much. But in five+ seasons, we've barely seen Lucy be anything other than her sunshine-y self for more than a handful of scenes. Even more so in the last few seasons. It is beyond time the writers take the time to give her character more depth and emotional range. It is beyond time they turn her back into a character that is deeply empathetic and relatable to the audience.

It has sucked seeing more and more commentary on social media the last few seasons about Lucy being childish, silly, unprofessional, and even manipulative 😭. And I think that's a direct result of the lack of care and intention the writers have put into writing her character since she graduated the FTO program. She's been used as little more than comic relief and a plot device outside of the ship for way too long.

Gif Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

While other characters have progressed professionally, Lucy has remained mostly stagnant since she graduated the FTO program, beyond a few UC missions that all pretty much ended the same way without doing anything progressive for her character (why didn't we see her struggle with the ethics of UC work when it came to using Aaron's puppy? why haven't they helped us understand how she reconciles her love for UC work to her empathetic nature and the reason she became a cop?).

I think of Lucy's journey in comparison to Tim's -- we've seen him go through awful things. We've seen him suffer. We've seen him struggle. We've seen him evolve and grow.

With Lucy, we've mostly just seen her go through awful things and move on as if nothing has changed. We all have our head canons, I think, about grief and coping and what's going on under the surface, but we don't actually know what she's feeling 99% of the time.

Do I wish they would have taken the opportunity to explore the impact on her character in the aftermath of DOD or after Jackson died? Of course I do. I would have preferred that to having to see her struggle professionally in the shadow of Nolan getting handed success for simply existing. (And if I thought they intended the juxtaposition, I'd give them credit for telling a realistic story, but I seriously doubt it 😂).

But I'm still glad they are taking the time to tell a story for her now. And I'm glad they seem to be doing it with intention.

And this was not at all what you asked about, but here you go anyway, anon 😜🥰

Thanks for the ask!

[addicsvt]

100 followers message <3

oh my god. it's been 11 months, 😭. i never thought i'd make it this far, it's been such an amazing journey. all the moot's i've met along the way 😭😭 all the milestones i have reached. and this, this is another one. thank you everyone for enjoying my work, reading it, reblogging it, liking it. i'm genuinely so grateful for everyone who has taken the time to follow me and read the work i put out. thank you to all my moots who have just been so so nice 💗thank you to all the moots who have tagged me in reblog games and to all the moots who have answered my asks 😭. i appreciate every single one of you. a special thank you to shu (@welcometomyoasis) my precious friend who's answered all my questions about writing 😭been there for me, and the very creator of my comfort fic 💗💗and another personal thank you to cien (@haecien) for being one of my first moots on this platform. i'm so grateful for every 100 of you who decided to click the button to follow and support me, thank you to everyone who has waited for fics that are sometimes months apart 🏃💨once again, thank you. this is ari signing out!

[jayflrt]

HELLO!

I like your work a lot like it's genuinely Hilarious so I thought you would be the best person to ask for this.

I want to make a writing tumblr for enhypen but I'm a little lost because I've never used tumblr (as a creator) before LOL just used twitter and AO3 to write/socmed for fictional fandoms (tbh this is my first time like being a proper fan of a kpop group as to occasionally liking a song or two).

Anyways! What I've gathered from my experience on twitter and the writers I've followed here is obviously your blog should have an intro about you (inc. what you're comfy with, what you write, etc.) and a master list of your works BUT some of Tumblr's mechanics are Confusing.

Like,

1) should I create specific tags for my asks?

2) on twt, usually you create a tweet like "Hi! New to #___twt, looking for moots blah blah" to get an initial burst of likewise new people to bond and communicate with, does it work similarly here and if so/not please elaborate TT

3) is the etiquette to reblog every work you like, or is that spammy and you should just like them?

4) is there any other advice you have for navigating tumblr (like odd quirks)

5) ALSO this is a small dumb question but in the fandoms I've been in until now we usually used socmed au instead of smau do you have any idea why that's different (low-key smau is smarter tho bcus it's a shorter abbreviation)

I think that's all. I tried going through your rules and intro again, but I didn't see anything on whether an ask like this was alright or not, but I hope it is! I didn't want to Like intrude, but I felt most comfortable asking you because you're also desi ❤️❤️.

Anyways!! If this is something you don't want to/don't feel comfortable answering or it's like annoying genuinely just ignore this, I don't want to be make anyone uncomfortable!

omg thank you so much ml, i'm so glad you enjoyed my works!! 🥹 welcome to the kpop community first of all!! did you recently become an engene? :') and welcome to the tumblr ff community too! honestly i feel like if you can navigate ao3 just fine then tumblr shouldn't be too difficult after a while but i'm sure it's confusing at first 😵‍💫

as for your questions i'll answer them in the same order you asked them:

1. honestly i'm not 100% sure if there's any real purpose behind specific tags for your asks other than organization personally LOL but it's pretty helpful if you want to go back to look through your asks for something instead of scrolling past all the posts on your blog !!

2. omg yes i love the twt intros 💗 honestly for tumblr i think i just started posting content right away whenever i made a blog 🤧 i think intros are usually just in your navigation anyways but if you want to talk to different authors then it doesn't hurt to send an ask!! usually people communicate with different authors via the ask box 🥰

3. all sorts of interaction is great but i think reblogs are preferred!! i typically use likes as my bookmarks and then reblogs to comment on work or share it to a wider audience. the algorithm for tumblr works so that your likes don't show for others (unless you make it public on your profile) but your reblogs are on the dashes of people who follow you

4. ooh i'd say make use of the tagging system!! using tags like #enhypen fluff or #enhypen x reader on your fics will make it easier for people to find your work 💘

5. HAHAH I USED TO CALL IT SOCMED AU TOO BEFORE I JOINED TUMBLR 😭 i still use social media au as a tag but i think smau is more widely used here!! not exactly sure why but im guessing its just easier to tag 🙂‍↕️ i get you tho bc i experienced the same culture shock

dont worry you're most welcome to send asks !! 🥰💘 and thank you for reading my rules and intro!! i definitely don't turn away anyone who's looking for advice <33 also omg fellow desi 🫶 welcome to enhablr !

[liauditore]

Cub and Pearl would both be competitive trainers 100%

Gem and Stress would be contest coordinators and have the cutest sparkliest pokemon in the world. (Your stress line up is on point)

False would be champion of the elite four but I’m not sure what type. False fans would need to help me out on that one-feels lazy to say fighting or steel type.

Etho would be the trainer for the first gym and have ghost type/dark type mons that look the coolest and most “ninja-like” (kill him) plus one really silly looking one. He’d get the shedinja after the post game level up.

Iskall would have a really fucking irritating set of normal type mons to battle and be the trainer for the eighth gym. His higher level team would be all slakoths fuck you man

Keralis would have like three of the Pokémon that evolve into sexy furrybait

Xb would just have three magikarps

(also your skizz lineup is so real. The lillipup made me chuckle)

LOVE THESE.

For my AU I purposefully made it so that none of them are "serious" trainers (because pokemon in day to day living was more in line with what I wanted to explore) but yeah in a context where that was an option, Pearl and Cub would absolutely reach for the sky. I think Jevin would too but eventually chill and settle down into being a gym leader instead.

Gem as a coordinator is so real but I also do think she would start vibrating violently on the spot if she was bested in a battle. Her uber-competitive nature won't let her rest!! I can see her having contests as her main thing but don't be fooled those pokemon have tighter training regimes than navy seals and she will DESTROY YOU no matter what you're challenging her in.

Since Gem and Pearl have been on my mind and I have a tendency to main characterify Pearl in a lot of these I love the idea of like. Pearl being mainly a trainer and Gem being mainly a coordinator but because Pearl really likes to learn new things and Gem is the world's sweatiest sweat they end up rubbing off on eachother and Pearl learns to be a coordinator on the side cus of Gem and Gem's passion for battle only becoming stronger from the fact that she can never seem to defeat Pearl.

Anyway Stress as a coordinator is so true I can see her being someone very well-respected as a veteran in the contest scene, probably gets invited as a judge just as much as she competes.

For False I can see her either being flying for her aviator theme or dragon because of my personal cynthia-inspired design bias. Alternatively the thought of False in Lusamine's outfit just crossed my mind and I would love to see her with a Bewear.

THE ETHO AND TEAM CANADA THING IS SO CUTE I LOVE THAT SO MUCH. My personal headcanon for my Etho in this AU is that he's an ex gym leader/e4/champion and has now gone into retirement so the thought of Beef and Pause witnessing essentially his entire career is so. augh I might steal that idea.

I love the Iskall section LMAO that one I might yoink as well or just some other really annoying team. I also like the idea of him having gulpin idk why it just makes sense to me and I think it'd be his little buddy and he'd take it on adventures and talk to it like his kid. Also like the idea of him having mons adjacent to Stress, like she has a smoochum and he has an elekid/magby or something (or alternatively, a wailord for the skitty)

The Keralis team is so funny cus I have him down as just having like. a pack of whismur that follow him around everything. and now I'm just imagining a mass of whismur + one lopunny like when farmers get an alpaca to look after sheep.

Xb being that one trainer in every game with 6 magikarp 😭😭 I'd like to think one of them has evolved and he either somehow hasn't noticed or just doesn't care that much and still treats it like a little guy. and everyone who comes over is terrified because holyyy fuckwhen did that thing get big.and he's just like what that's just fish 3

[l-tora-l-archived]

HELLO CUTIE WHATS UR MAIN BLOG, SHARE PLS XOXO

HIIII sorry for taking like ten centuries to respond to this but like tbh ;; Im quitting tumblr I think. (ALSO UNI PLS IGNORE THIS LOL ITS MAINLY FOR EVERYONE ELSE CAUSE I ALR TOLD YOU ID POST THIS HAHA😭🙏)

Mega explanation under the cut talking abt some of the trashy behaviour I've had to experience on this forsaken app over the years, but mostly how I feel about it so yeah if you don't care that's alr hope everyone has a good life, cause as I said I quit.

I deleted the new blog I ended up making bc this environment has never really been welcoming to me and I can 100% say that tumblr has actively made my experiences with practically everything irl AND online worse than any fruitful goodness it has or could ever bring. From putting my everything into relationships including comfort, support and psychological + therapeutic sessions for people even over ten yrs older than me (at times older) without even getting a single kind thought back, to the genuine rudeness of some people, to the (excuse my language) but half assed and crude responses I receive ... honestly the list is endless.

One thing I'm trying to get better at is to notice when my presence is clearly not wanted and act accordingly. It's just saddening that the one place where it's encouraged to be your true "nerdy" self, as the catchphrase of this site is, I am not allowed to be just that. I really do wonder what part of me is so incredibly intolerable or forgettable, that I am expected to practically grovel for even ten minutes of people's time - and that's with the closest people I know, forget abt ten minutes for regular conversation I can't even get ten minutes from the people I stood with through thick and thin with, even though I myself struggle really hard to be there and yet always am.

From now on I'll just say that no I will definitely not come back, I will also not use this account and if I ever DO come back it would probably just be a call out thread on SOME people who deserve jail time more than silly time on tumblr dot come /hj (but not rlly hj hahejdsj this is so srs and continues to impact my life after almost 2 years ... but ugh what.ever.���👍). But I'm also a coward ngl so like that would never happen !

I would say "oh btw I have this account you can keep in touch on ! :>" but truthfully, I am so let down by how uninteractive, uncaring and exclusionary everyone is no matter how hard I try to do the best I can to treat others how I'd love to be treated, and how I basically am sweating to keep convos going, bc in truth I don't think anyone rlly likes me enough here or anywhere really to even want to talk to me in general, so I'll spare you all that. The proof is literally in the fact that I've amassed a sizeable following which I am shocked with, yet despite it all I feel so lonely bc nobody even bothers with me at all whilst ppl who just start out get 50 best friends in such a short time frame. I see I am not everyone's cup of tea.

I once thought maybe just maybe I could have a good time online just how everyone suggests that online is better than irl and it is a reprieve for some. Looks like I am eternally unlucky bc how is online on par or perhaps even worse than irl for me ? And make no mistake irl is atrocious to me too.

I do not mean this to be passive aggressive but I just want to communicate my thoughts. If I was being passive aggressive that'd imply that I knew that everyone here was capable of treating me as I wanted, as I have consistently treated my "friends" on here, as a reciprocated effort. But as this thread suggests, that was and can never be a reality for me.

TLDR // not coming back bc :

People genuinely don't care or don't put in any effort at all

Bullies (mean ppl way at the beginning of my account) + I am let down how everyone let TWO whole adults get away with being weird to a then minor (me) right in front of your faces

Very traumatised and uncomfortable being on this app to the point I can barely even socialise at all from the precipitating impacts.

Hope everyone has a good life.