#i have like two other versions of this because i couldn’t decide on a verse to use | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jhuzen · 1 year

Note

if ur requests are open…virgin Kazuha with a player m!reader.

Reader made a bet with Beidou about how long it’ll take to get to fuck Kazuha since he’s one of the people on the Crux that the reader hasn’t fucked and Kazuha overhears.

He knows he shouldn’t give in, but he’s wanted the reader for so long so they end up fucking (and confessing feelings because I’m a romantic😭).

tip [m.reader]

actual title: [just the] tip, LMAO. I AM BACK FROM THE DEAD AND I’M BRINGING THREE SMUTS WITH ME. anyway. i think we all know when i say soon, it means 2 weeks later. fuck. i’m so sorry yall i do not know how to squeeze my brain for creativity. so the past two weeks, i’m just working out and gaming and illustrating. also i was halfway through the smut when i got the request for the player reader aND THATS WHEN IMAGINATION STRUCK. so anyway have this adorable samurai, tysm baby for letting me win your 50/50 again ilysm mwah.

𖦹 gentle sex, romantic stuff, they say ily in the end (and i am jealous), it’s been weeks since my last smut so bear with me, an attempt at an oral, fingering, penetration, lots of reassurances, top male reader

It all started with a simple bet between you and Beidou. She was the same captain that challenged you many times in drinking contests, after all (most of which, you’ve lost to her). And while you cannot exactly handle all of your alcohol like she can’t, no one could say the same when it comes to your visceral need to possibly get every living being on the bed with you.

It was a running joke between the entire crew. With your utterly promiscuous nature, you’ve managed to bed every bachelor and bachelorette on the Alcor. It was an amazing feat and an occurrence that happened so much, people would casually compare your performance with each other. Granted, it was embarrassing, but such is the price of being so… whorish.

Not a single soul was saved, even the sweet housekeeper from Mondstadt and his superior that were traveling to the nation of freedom to strike a deal with an elusive winery owner weren’t saved from your promiscuity. Beidou was already hurting from the sides from all the laughing she’s done once she realizes the fleeting glances between the two of them towards you were no mere coincidences.

But maybe not a single soul being saved was… an overstatement.

All of them weren’t safe except for one — the elusive ronin that frequently traveled with Beidou’s crew; Kaedehara Kazuha himself. For some reason, he was the one person that you couldn’t bed, and unfortunately for you, Beidou noticed. She noticed how your flirtatious flair would tone down, turning you into the most unassuming version of yourself that any of the Alcor has ever seen whenever you would entertain Kazuha up in the crow’s nest, a gentle smile on your lips instead of that knowing smirk that could leave anyone writhing.

Beidou already had an idea by then, but she decided to aid you in getting things moving as she made one bet to you.

“If you can get our romantic poet in bed with you, I will retract all drinking contests in the future.”

Your terms were flimsy and shallow. But you figured your liver would greatly appreciate the deal. And if you won, you only said that the captain would have to admit that, although untrue, you have, at some point, beaten her in one contest.

Had you only known what your dear little ronin has in store for you.

Kazuha, admittedly, is an absolute romantic. The verses in his poetry could not make that mere fact any clearer. His mind and heart can coordinate and weave the sweetest words lodged in limited verses that sing the sweetest praises to the unknown.

And often you were the victim of it. Kazuha was well aware of how subdued you seem around him, suddenly discarding the playboy persona that you were known around for, your very reputation that despite the efforts that Kazuha made in order to evade it, it still somehow managed to take the longest detour right to his heart.

You were a magnet that had limitless attraction Kazuha was just a drop in a sea of particles that continued to gravitate to you, despite his constant rumination that you were never going to be a constant in his life. He lives to seek every corner of the world while you discovered the uncharted parts of someone else’s bare skin in your endeavors.

How ironic was it that in his inconsistent lifestyle, he was terrified of having you — someone who is just as much of constant as his stays on places while he wandered through all nations.

But the tiny voice at the back of his head were screaming, pleading for a chance to even experience the atmosphere with you when wrapped in the haze of lust and sex.

It was probably why the moment he overheard your tiny wager with Beidou, the restraints that he kept on his poor longing heart suddenly loosened. And it was probably why the moment you amped up your flirtatious tendencies, Kazuha was suddenly breathless.

To experience of being the end of your smooth words was something Kazuha can only describe as what it feels like to get a taste of his own medicine. Suddenly, you were more forward, you didn’t wait for him to ask you and gaze at the skies with him on the crow’s nest. Everywhere he was, you were suddenly around, like a persistent python that coiled around him until he could no longer breathe — and he loved it.

Maybe it’s why your advances were easily reciprocated by him. Maybe it’s why all of a sudden, he wanted your hand to linger under his chin. Maybe it’s why, out of all his resistance to your charm, it all comes crashing down into a futile effort.

And maybe it’s also exactly why his heart hammered with persistence against his ribcage despite the ache in his knees as he knelt and did his best to suck you off with little to no experience under his belt.

You sat on the edge of the bed, eyes downcast to meet Kazuha’s teary eyes. He was already ruined just from this, mouth barely able to take in more of you. But you were a persistent teacher, and he was an eager student.

A smirked played upon your pretty lips, hand gliding over to Kazuha’s soft cheek before pinching it, stretching his mouth just a little bit more as you slowly pushed your hips, watching your cock make it barely even halfway through Kazuha’s mouth.

You were used to the experienced men that could take you in skillfully even with your size, but the inexperience was somewhat of a breath of fresh air — if not, utterly adorable. The way his tongue refused to stay flat while your cock pushed in, his teeth grazing against your sensitive head ever so slightly, and archons, those lovely tears that glistened through his wet eyelashes as the honorable ronin looked up at you for any form of approval.

“You’ve no idea how incredibly delectable you look right now, love.” Your smooth voice filled his ears and he hummed, pleased from the praise, leaving you hissing as the vibrations from his mouth enveloped your cock.

“Think you can manage a few more inches?” You asked with a curious grin.

Kazuha doesn’t think so, but the innate need to please you and seek your praise was something he quickly found out the moment you stripped him of his robes and adored his body with your sweet words. He nodded, a little unconvincing, a little reluctant, and a little nervous.

You guided his hands that rested on your thighs to grip the base of your length, “For better leverage,” you said, though quite true, it was equally just an excuse to feel his cute little hands around you.

The ronin nodded once more before pushing further, dipping his head until he can take more of you. His cheeks burned and the moment the tip of your head hits the back of his throat, Kazuha immediately pulls back, coughing. You ran your hand through his hair, flashing him a reassuring smile.

“Too much?”

Kazuha’s lips were wet from his own saliva. He opened his eyes to see a tiny sinful string of saliva that connected his lips to your cockhead. He looked up at you with so much determination, almost eager to try again, and while it was immensely adorable, you decided to take pity on Kazuha as you pulled him up to your lap.

“I-I can do more…”

“And we’ll work on that next time,” you said with the same soft reassurance that he has heard from you every time you and Kazuha would engage in a conversation. But it wasn’t what made his heart jump — it was the fact that you opened up the possibility of a next time for him. A possibility that this isn’t a one time thing as he feared.

Before he could even process anything else, his back hits the soft mattress beneath him. It should have been intimidating, but to see tower over him with such a huge figure, Kazuha could only feel the unbridled warmth that radiated from you. He waited with bated breath as you looked down on him, a smile so inviting that it doesn’t even remotely feel like he was participating in a bet, that you were making love to him so tenderly instead.

“Think it’s time for me to finally take care of you, hm?” Your soft croon reached his ears and he could only nod, meek yet still so bloody excited for what happens next.

He could feel his breath get caught in his throat the moment your hands easily opened his legs, and he willfully complied despite how his thighs quivered under your grasp. He watched seat yourself in between his legs, watching you open up that one familiar package of lubricant. You squeezed a generous amount on your fingers before turning to him.

“Try to relax, yeah?”

“M-Mhm…”

Kazuha doesn’t question the way his back immediately arched up as his body responded to your fingers that slowly penetrated him. He could feel the coldness and he shivered, squirming at the tight fit. He could feel it all too much. His hand immediately shot up to latch onto your strong shoulders while he let out a strangled gasp.

Your little samurai was all too enticing, “My~ what a mess I’ve made you, and just from my fingers alone too…” You laughed and Kazuha can only whimper closing his eyes shut to avoid any further embarrassment, though it was clearly futile by then.

Your slowly pumped your fingers, feeling out Kazuha’s gummy walls. He clenched on your fingers with every movement, leaving him writhing against the sheets. It was a sensation that he was all too new in experiencing. His soft gasps and quiet whines echoed through the walls of the remote inn that you graciously paid for under the guise of taking shelter with your travel companion.

Kazuha cried out your name so sweetly, and it was as if the heavens are calling you.

“[Name]… m-more…” he pleaded with a tiny voice, barely managing while your fingers continued to penetrate through his walls that continued to pulsate around your digits. You indulged in every moan that spilled from his lips as you pumped your fingers even more.

You licked your lips, eyeing the samurai in bliss so hungrily. He was ethereal even when he’s a complete mess with sweat cascading through his soft skin and his hair completely tousled as he continued to squirm from your ministrations alone. You drank the very sight of him and you couldn’t wait to take him then and there.

A choked gasp suddenly weaseled out of him as your fingers finally grazed his prostate.

“H-Hah—!” You watched in fascination as your endeared ronin came just from that alone. Cum dripped down from his cock, making a tiny pool on his abdomen. Kazuha was breathless, his body quivering in inconsistent intervals as he reached his high all too early. He looked at you, just as surprised as you are.

“O-Oh… D-Did I—? Already?” Kazuha’s embarrassment was unparalleled, but you were quick to quell that as you leaned in, showering his heaving chest the most chaste kisses, filled with so much care and love that were absent from your times with others. No amount of sweetness could amount to your shallow ones when it wasn’t Kazuha.

“You treat it like it’s a problem,” you chuckled and Kazuha’s face flushed at your playful chastising. Of course it must be a problem. One too many he’s heard about people lasting in bed a better feat when it comes to sex. But you were quick to refute the little beliefs he had. “It only means I’m making you feel good, no?”

Kazuha nodded, speechless for once at such a gentle treatment. He’s heard from the accounts of others just how rough you can be, some men even having to complain about it to you openly, while you only gave a tiny apology before slithering away. But this, even Kazuha wasn’t too certain if this was something new for you or if you thought that he was too fragile to handle you. He griped to himself at the thought and he quickly grabbed onto your wrist.

“I-I’m ready,” he muttered, giving you the full green light.

You have half a mind to question him for a second time, but his look of determination and your own cock that only throbbed painfully against your abdomen was enough to persuade you.

Kazuha could only look on, his eyes widening when his struggles earlier to take you in just with his own mouth came back to bite him in the ass. He looked up, a little frantic as the anxiety only flooded through him — he could barely suck you off without suffocating, how could he take you in so easily.

You only leaned to kiss at the shell of his ear, as gentle as you can, “Don’t worry, we’ll stop if you can’t.”

His arms were quick to hook around your neck, looking down and quivering a little as he felt the way your cockhead brushed against the rim of his entrance, prodding at him with so much temptation. “But… I don’t want it to stop…” he mumbled, only making you laugh at such a sweet sentiment.

“One at a time, mkay? It’s your first time,” You whispered as you slowly lined up, your shaft already prodding at Kazuha’s lubed up hole. “Ready?”

Taking a deep breath, Kazuha only nodded, surrendering control to you to take care of him.

It wasn’t a mistake to be so near him as your ears indulged in Kazuha’s sweetest cries as you slowly eased yourself in. You didn’t bother going all the way as you felt him clench around you even with just a few inches in. It was adorable, remotely endearing as you continued a couple more inches.

“W-Wait,” he was quick to plead, and you stopped, listening intently to his whims.

“Why don’t we practice with just this much, hm?” It wasn’t even a surprise as Kazuha quickly agreed, eager to follow you. He succumbed into the submission of being under your control, to let you do as you please to him and you relished in that very permission to take in every bit of him even the slowest ways.

You drew out some quiet sobs from poor Kazuha as your hips drew back, only to stop just before you could pull out. Your sensitive head alone could even feel the slightest bumps within his walls and it was absolutely divine.

Kazuha hiccuped through his tears despite your shallow, languid thrusts — barely even fully inside and yet he’s already so spent. You could feel every gasp getting pulled out from his system with how his cock seemed to brush against your abdomen with every movement.

“Feels good?” You asked and he only nodded — quite frankly it was a miracle that Kazuha could even still make of what you can say.

“D-Deeper, [Name],” Kazuha begged, coming out in a tiny mewl that you couldn’t seem to refuse.

You followed through his demand, letting in a couple more inches inside and he was squealing so wantonly. The way his walls clenched onto your length, he could feel every sinful throb within his tight warm walls and he couldn’t help but squirm, inching away from your cock when you held him down.

“You can do it, you’re a good boy, yes?” You smiled, your thrusts slowly growing deeper and deeper until it left him writhing underneath you. You could feel the delectable scratch on your broad back as he clutched onto you for dear life.

“M-Mhm… a good boy,” he parroted, his mind numbing with each thrust, his hips slowly meeting your movement as the fervent need to feel you grew inside him.

You were just as easily losing it as your hips moved in a steady pace. Never had you even been this gentle on someone even — but somehow Kazuha brought it out of you. Your soft grunts melded with his delectable moans as you moved your head, lips just a hair distance away from him.

And then it spills from your lips;

“Fuck… I love you so much…”

Kazuha’s eyes snapped open and you immediately stopped your movements, your cock still inches deep inside your little ronin.

A wave of clarity washed over Kazuha as the realization hit you both.

“You mean it?” He asked, love in his eyes with so much anticipation.

You only laughed as you leaned in, “Couldn’t get anymore obvious with that,” you quipped, all too amused as the blush overtook Kazuha’s face down to his neck. A little taken aback, but he only smiled, bringing you in close for a sweet kiss.

“Well, I share the sentiment.” Kazuha mumbled, his breath ghosting over your lips as a lovestruck expression completely took hold of his pretty face.

“Would it kill you to say it back?”

“I love you too.”

You only showed your satisfaction with your lips on his, your fingers digging into the soft flesh of his waist as you lifted him up. A needy whimper was pulled out of Kazuha’s throat as you thrusted one more time, a mischievous and eager smile grazing your face.

You were going to show Kazuha so much more.

And lucky for you, you’ve got the whole night to express that love to each other.

#can you hear me crying because i’ve never felt so single #NEXT ONE #we’re gonna be screwing two dragons in their own separate fics #ofc ofc #genshin impact x male reader #kaedehara kazuha x male reader #kazuha x male reader #kazuha smut #sub genshin impact #jhuzen’s stupid one shots #jhuzen’s shameless filth

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ghosts-and-blue-sweaters · 1 month

Note

For the Ghostbur centric au: 3, 8, 11, 13, and 22!!

Did anything inspire this au?

YES I WAS HOPING SOMEONE WOULD ASK THIS YAYAYAY!!! This entire AU would not exist at all if it weren’t for these two things:

I’d Rather Be Alone by Brye

a compilation of tiktoks that got recommended to me on youtube

I know that last one is rather harrowing, but let me explain!

In late June of this year, I was in the car on a long roadtrip, listening to music. I’d Rather Be Alone started playing on shuffle, I believe, and as I listened I was overcome by a particularly vivid scene of Dream and Ghostbur. It was surprising to have such a scene enter my brain because Ghostbur & Dream just aren’t a duo that I think about often lol. But man, it was such a vivid scene!! It was a modern AU, and Dream was shouting at Ghostbur and threatening him while Ghostbur tried to press himself into a wall. Interesting!

That was pretty much where the idea went dry, however; I tried to think of an explanation as to why Ghostbur & Dream were in that situation, but I couldn’t come up with anything satisfactory. I still thought about the scene whenever I listened to I’d Rather Be Alone, but apart from that, I kinda let it drift from my head.

About a month later, I was scrolling youtube and got a pretty strange recommendation: a compilation of tiktoks that young teenagers made about running away from home. I watched a few minutes of it, intrigued but not super interested. Then, all of a sudden, it hit me: a crisp mental image of Ghostbur walking through a dark neighborhood, with a very young Tommy (like, toddler-aged) folllwing him. In my mind, they were running away, but I had no idea why.

THEN. MERE MINUTES LATER. IT HIT ME AGAIN: THE SCENE OF DREAM & GHOSTBUR. GHOSTBUR & TOMMY RUNNING AWAY FROM HOME. WHAT IF… I COMBINED THEM???

As a result, I’ve wound up with this: Ghostbur, Dream, and Tommy are all brothers. Dream is abusive towards Ghostbur. Ghostbur, one day, decides to run away with Tommy. Much more stuff happens and the AU is much more complex than this, but yeah!!

What platonic relationships are important in this au?

Ghostbur and Dream, by far the most important! This has been the most fascinating part of the AU for me, because 1) I’m exploring a relationship that I haven’t thought much about before, and 2) I’m exploring a version of their relationship where they’re brothers. Which is so obscure and strange!! But my gosh it’s been really fun to think about.

Is there any relationship that's different in this au than in the source material?

Again, Dream and Ghostbur! In canon, they definitely are not related in any way lol. I feel pretty confident saying that I’m the first person to ever say “what if they were brothers” ajsfajgskagsjs BUT DUDE IT’S BEEN SO FUN!!! THEM BEING BROTHERS HAS BEEN SO FUN TO WORK WITH!!!

Write a lil snippet set in this verse.

Congratulations my friend Hazel. Because of you asking this question, I put down the very first words for this fic :) I’d been quite stuck on it beforehand and hadn’t written a thing, but your question was motivating!! So thank you :D

For context, the three brothers are parked in a McDonald’s parking lot because Dream thought it would be a good idea to get ice cream at like 9pm aksgajsgjags. Unfortunately Tommy is literally Four Years Old and Hungry.

~~~

“I want chicken nuggets!” Tommy announces, setting his empty cup into the cupholder built into his car seat.

“No.” Dream pokes around his own cup. “I already said no.”

“Please?”

“No, Tommy.”

Ghostbur watches them both; his younger brother, with stained cheeks and blue eyes, and his not-quite-as-young other brother, sitting behind the wheel and stubbornly attempting to scoop out the last of the sticky caramel from the plastic. He inhales. “I think it’s alright, Dream.”

“Hm?”

“I think it’s alright. We can get some chicken nuggets for him.”

Dream looks up, meeting his eyes while chewing slowly. Ghostbur raises his eyebrows slightly. Dream sighs. “It’s late.”

“We’ve already gotten ice cream.”

“He doesn’t need anymore food.”

“He can have a little.”

“He doesn’t need any.”

“But I’m hungry!” Tommy interjects.

Ghostbur glances back at him, grinning. He looks to Dream. “He’s hungry.”

Dream is still for a moment, and then he lets out a long, loud sigh. Without a word, he sets down his cup and places both hands on the wheel.

Tommy cheers. Ghostbur laughs, softly, and he thinks that he wouldn’t choose to have any other life than this.

____

“I thought you said it was too late for food?” Ghostbur questions, popping a fry into his mouth.

Dream glances at him out of the corner of his eyes. “It’s only fair that I got something for us, too. Otherwise we would’ve just gotten hungry smelling the nuggets.”

Ghostbur shifts until he can see into the backseat. Tommy looks out the window, swinging his legs happily as he munches on a chicken nugget. Ghostbur smiles even though Tommy isn’t looking at him.

“You haven’t even thanked me yet.” Dream’s face still looks a bit annoyed, but his voice is light. “I bought you food and you don’t even say thank you. What a brother.”

“My sincerest apologies, dear Dream.” Ghostbur grins, putting another fry into his mouth. Dream looks at him—his full face, this time—and grins back. One hand on the wheel, he reaches his other for the cupholder nearest to him, where Ghostbur had placed the small carton of fries that Dream had bought for them both. Dream grabs a few fries and stuffs them into his mouth, eyes watching the dark road. They’re driving through backroads now; they’d left the highway some minutes ago, replacing the streetlights and chain restaurants with green fields and stars. Ghostbur knows that sheep live in these fields. He wishes it were bright enough to see them now. He likes driving past them during the day and catching small glimpses into their quiet lives. He’s always liked sheep.

~~~

You get another snippet too, because I wanted to share both :)

~~~

Then Dream finds a band-aid. It’s a yellow one.

“See?” He says after sticking it onto Ghostbur’s skin, even though Ghostbur was in front of a mirror and could’ve done it himself. “That’s better, right? It’s like it never happened.”

Ghostbur stares at his reflection. His brown eyes, his now messy hair, his blue sweater with a little embroidered sun over his heart, and his yellow band-aid. He can see the edges of a bruise peaking out from the fabric.

Dream’s reflection looks at Ghostbur’s reflection, and he reaches over and musses up his hair—a familiar gesture, made with a fondness that Dream reserves specifically for Ghostbur. Ghostbur’s the only one he trusts. The only one he feels safe with. Ghostbur knows this. Dream’s fingers are soft against the skin of Ghostbur’s head, and then the fingers fall away. Dream’s reflection tells him goodnight, and then he walks out of the small bathroom. Ghostbur continues staring at himself for some moments. Slowly, he reaches up two fingers, lightly pressing the band-aid. It hurts. He lets his fingers drop.

He has trouble sleeping. It happens every now and again; often enough for doctors to prescribe him medication, but not often enough for Ghostbur to remember to take it. He lies awake now, eyes trained on the ceiling where little plastic stars glow. Dream had stuck dozens of them up there, years ago. Ghostbur doesn’t remember why. It may have been his birthday, or he may have been having a really awful day. Perhaps it was both.

Regardless, Dream had stuck the stars onto Ghostbur’s ceiling, and they’ve stayed ever since. Ghostbur likes them. They’re not as good as real stars, but they’re fun, and childish in a comforting way, and they make him feel safer.

Ghostbur breathes in deeply through his mouth. He can smell artificial fruit in his breath when he exhales; toothpaste that had washed away the salt and grease from the fries. Ghostbur’s never been able to use mint toothpaste without his mouth burning. He thinks the flavor he has now is watermelon. It tastes nothing at all like watermelon. It’s better than mint, though.

“Look at me.”

Ghostbur flinches, and the skin under his band-aid flashes with a pain he doesn’t want to remember. Dream hadn’t meant to do it that hard. He knows that. He knows it was an accident.

He rolls over with a sigh, the uninjured side of his face pressing into his pillow. He can’t see any of the stars anymore.

He doesn’t sleep.

What was the hardest to write about this fic?

I haven’t written enough to say (so far, every snippet I’ve written has been easy) but there is a particular scene that will be emotionally hard to write, I think. It involves heavy Ghostbur angst :(

#ask game answers #ask #abuse warning #<—very very vague but tagging to be safe #also is carton the correct word to use for a thing of fries?? so genuinely unsure

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crowtrobotx · 1 year

Text

A little stupid thank you to @grisailledreams for bein’ a good friend and also consistently supporting my mediocre writing, to the point where she gets mad if anyone beats her to being the first comment on a Chrysalis chapter lol. 💜 Ily.

This is largely just for her but because some of you care about Astarion and Karl/Kris, here’s a fun little crossover I decided to share on here rather than solely in private. Brynne is her OC, and Karl is a Dwarf artificer in BG3 because it’s funny and I said so.

Title: Feline Fancy

Words: 1301

Pairings: Astarion x OC, background BG3!verse Karl Heisenberg x OC (they’re also sometimes a polycule. Everyone is bi/pan and nothing matters.)

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: None

************************************************

“Good Gods. It’s like watching a flea-ridden stray put on a show for scraps.”

“Astarion. Be nice.”

“I am being nice. I didn’t say the worse version that was rattling around in my head.”

Judging by the oppressive darkness and quiet that bore down on the little wilderness camp from all sides, it must have been somewhere in the wee hours of the morning by now. The crickets had stopped their shrieking, at least, although Brynne’s light plucks at her lute sounded unnaturally loud in the stillness. Between the heavy sensation pulling at his eyelids from the cheap wine - Baldur’s Grape, what a joke - and the buzzing sensation in his blood still present from feeding on an unfortunate bandit earlier, Astarion was trapped in a strange chasm between exhaustion and mania, one that was making him exceedingly grouchy. The sight of the pair on the other side of the bonfire wasn’t helping - even against the bright orange glow of flame he could make them out, and fuck he couldn’t escape from the sound of the infuriating giggles.

The party hadn’t known each other that long. They were still feeling each other out, which sometimes led to awkward situations like tonight, where the quartet had argued about the watch schedule to the point that they had all decided to stay awake out of pure spite.

Though he would stake himself before he admitted it, he trusted Brynne’s judgment, for the most part. If she said their two new companions were a value to their cause, then so be it. It was true that the elves’ talents, while useful, were better suited to petty thievery than full on adventuring. Having an exceptionally angry outlander who regularly threw fully grown men over bar tables and a deeply insane artificer with a moral backbone best described as “jelly-like” at least gave them a fighting chance.

But did the Dwarf have to be so damn dramatic?

Karl had announced (loudly, far too loudly) to the group that he was going to bed some time ago before sauntering off to the tent he and his partner shared. Kris, a Barbarian woman and the partner in question, had simply shrugged and continued sharpening the monstrous greataxe she bore that was almost as tall as Astarion himself. When she hadn’t followed after an hour, Karl had poked his head back out with the look of an petulant child plastered on his face, sighed loudly, gone back inside, sighed even louder, and then stomped back outside to plop down in the grass at Kris’s side.

If Astarion didn’t know better, he’d have almost said that she’d smirked at the display, as if she’d quietly concocted the whole thing herself. Cheeky. A few minutes passed in silence - rare for the party - before Karl wordlessly flopped to his side, head landing squarely in the Barbarian’s lap.

What had followed was the expected quick bickering that the couple seemed to use as some twisted variety of foreplay, culminating with Kris abandoning her task and begrudgingly beginning to scratch her short nails through his silvery hair and beard. The Dwarf, apparently not content with merely acting like a lap animal, proceeded to debase himself further by periodically rotating and shifting to ensure that she reached the right spots and making sounds that wouldn’t have sounded out of place coming from a content Owlbear.

Astarion wanted to vomit.

“It’s pathetic,” Astarion said, taking another swig of the dry red. “Truly, truly sad.”

Brynne sighed at his side and set her lute to lean against the fallen log they were sat upon. She’d been trying to tune it to little avail - the strings badly needed replaced, but they were so far from refined civilization at the moment that just getting the instrument to survive until the next backwater luthier popped up would be an achievement.

“Well, I think it’s sweet.” The pale pink of her skin was lovely in the firelight, and the deep green of her wavy hair made it seem to blend into the dark of the sky overhead. She was ethereal, beautiful, too good to be in the situation they’d found themselves - which meant, for Astarion, that she was also infuriating.

“You would,” he sneered. “You think everything is sweet. Remember when we passed by that ridiculous Tiefling caravan a few weeks ago? You burst into tears at the sight of the pseudodragon hatchling they had in that cage.”

“It was so small!” Brynne whined. She covered her face with her hands and groaned. “I just wanted to bite it!”

“And there! Hypocrisy! You’re always chastising me when I say the same thing.”

“Because you mean bite as in ‘break skin and drain blood.’ I mean bite in the way that you chomp on a baby’s chubby cheeks. It’s different.”

Astarion rolled his eyes. He lifted the goblet to his lips once more and was vexed to find it empty. He was pretty sure the only alcohol left was the Barbarian’s whiskey flask, and even he wasn’t arrogant (or stupid) enough to ask her to share. It seemed he’d have to greet the morning sober. What a shame.

Another low chuckle from Kris. Another contented sigh from Karl. It was maddening.

“Why does she put up with it?” he mused aloud. “He acts like this all the time - like if he doesn’t get attention for ten minutes he’ll burst into flame! And she enables it!”

Brynne didn’t respond. She only turned her blue-eyed gaze to him and raised a brow, waiting for him to continue.

“It’s just…. Baffling! How did he even feed himself before meeting her? What’ll we do if Kris has to go off on her own for a few days? I’m certainly not going to give him head scratches like he’s the world’s most bedraggled mutt. It’ll be like having a full time job! If the rest of us adults can get by without being pampered like child emperors, the Dwarf should be more than capable.”

Brynne blinked.

“You want to get petted, too.”

“Indeed.”

Astarion rolled onto his back and settled his tousle of white curls into Brynne’s lap. The Wood Elf laughed, like a high ringing bell, and clicked her tongue. “You’re certain you’re not some kind of polymorphed cat?”

“If I am, you’re the sucker who can’t resist getting a good purr out of me.”

The night hid whatever blush might have blossomed on Brynne’s cheeks. She lightly slapped his hand and settled back, ready to get comfortable until the dawn bled color into the sky.

“No beard, so I’ll have to just focus on your hair, if it pleases your majesty.”

“Do be careful not to mess it up that much. I put a lot of effort into looking flawless, you know.”

“Too bad it’s not working.”

“You wound me, my lady.”

Brynne snorted. “Fair is fair, you blood sucking charlatan.”

She threaded her fingers through his curls, the gentle scratch of nails on his scalp eliciting a light shiver that shook its way down his spine. Once again, he’d rather go back to eating rats than confess just how chuffed he was to have her full, adoring and undivided attention, even for a moment. Come morning, the focus would be back on surviving the mountain pass, rationing supplies, trying not to attract the attention of whatever ancient things lurked in the shadowy crevasses that loomed overhead.

He still had doubts - still found himself occasionally wanting to run off and risk his chances alone. But, to his delight and horror, those desires grew weaker with each passing day, each passing swipe of her hands across his head.

Astarion shut his eyes, lips pulling into an easy and content smile, and missed the loving yet exasperated head shakes exchanged between Brynne and Kris from across the fire.

#this is so hyper specific to our interests/OCs and I do not care #okay to rb/share but bg3 fandom if you start acting like clowns on this you will get blocked <3 #same with re8 fandom but most of you left are cool so I’m less concerned there

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boysplanetrecaps · 7 months

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Build Up Recap Episode 2: Beautiful (orig. Crush)

Welcome back to another recap in my Build Up recap series! In the previous one, I covered Decalcomanie, a song originally performed by Mamamoo. In this one, I finally bring the Pre4 mission to an end with the performance of Beautiful, originally by Crush. Let’s go!

I found a youtube clip of this part, if you’d like to watch.

Once the judges have stopped laughing at poor Suhwan for his jacket, Dahee announces the next team, which is the final team -- team Beautiful. Backstage, all the guys react -- they all love this song.

The song itself might be familiar to you if you watched the drama “Guardian,” also known as “Goblin.” (I know everyone loved it, but I found it… weird.) It was sung by Crush, who you might remember from the song Rush Hour.

And here to sing it are Taewoo, Kim Minseo, Jeong Yunseo and Lim Sanghyun.

Taewoo introduces himself by saying, “I’m in charge of the unique voice. I’m managing a startup while I sing. I’m singer-songwriter Taewoo.” Jaehwan on the judging panel says, “Ah, a CEO!”

Minseo says, “I’m in charge of powerful voice. A Dex lookalike.” The judges decide he really does look like Dex.

Yeonseo introduces himself as an all-rounder, a “hexagon vocalist.” (Basically, “hexagon” is slang for saying you’re multi-talented.) He says he’s a trainee at Mystic Story. Mystic Story manages Lucy (a boy-band) and Billlie (a girl group).

Sangyhun didn’t get the sweater memo; he’s going blazer. He quietly introduces himself by saying, “I’m in charge of soul and sweet voice, singer-songwriter Lim Sanghyun.” And we find out that Sanghyun helped produce Jaehwan’s fourth mini-album! That’s cool. We stan a talented king.

I found a different Youtube clip of this part.

The judges point out that two of them are trainees, and ask if they’re nervous.

Yunseo confidently says he’s not nervous, and we go into a flashback.

Minseo, at a pre-production meeting -- it must have been a while back, since his hair is like an inch shorter -- says that he’s been a trainee for 4 years.

He mentions that he trained with Ricky, Gyuvin, Yujin, and Zhang Hao from Boys Planet/Zerobase1, so I guess he was/is at Yuehua. He couldn’t help but feel al little jealous and frustrated that they had that “dreamy opportunity.” I get it -- that’s normal, I think.

We hop to the guys at their first meeting, starting to distribute the parts. Yeonseo is getting a lot of compliments from the hyungs, and says he’s good at adding harmony. He seems confident about adding ideas, so Minseo starts to feel a bit intimidated. He says he’s never really done harmony. Really? After four years? What have you been working on, lovey?

Sanghyun takes on the role of helpful hyung to Minseo. Minseo tries the harmony with some of the others, and they let him try the ending, helping to build up his confidence.

So, how will the trainees do?

Link to the version without reactions

My thoughts:

This performance is squarely in my “really really good, for some reason not super-star” tier. A+, just not quite S. But it was still A+!

I think part of it is that Lim Sanghyun and Taewoo have incompatible voices, so changing from one to the other line to line made them both sound worse.

Lim Sanghyun led off with a lovely, soft gruff tone that I actually had to turn my volume up to hear. It was very sweet and gentle, almost like a whisper, but still tuneful, which isn’t easy to do. He also brought the song to a lovely finish with his tone. I think I’d rather just hear him sing a song all the way through, just him singing, because I’m not sure his voice blended with any of the other voices here. But I did really like his voice on its own.

Taewoo has what I’ll call a YG voice. It would not be out of place singing a Big Bang song, with his specific, sharp nasal vocal color and swaggy affectations. It’s quite lovable in its way. It doesn’t sound great back to back with Sanghyun’s voice, unfortunately, but if he were singing a verse from Fantastic Baby I’d be into it. He lets notes kind of flop down instead of holding them, he sort of swoops on some notes, that kind of thing. He doesn’t seem to prioritize pitch, though he can definitely hit the right notes when he is harmonizing. He was so sweet and encouraging to Minseo during their harmony portion, so it’s a bummer that I have to say that among these four, his performance was my least favorite. He does have my favorite sweater, though.

Going from their teasers, Minseo had my favorite voice among these four, but I think his lack of experience showed here. I really, really liked his teaser performance of Rolling in the Deep by Adele (V39), and said that he has a distinct, real voice that shows some training but also some rough edges. But here he was soooo nervous. It really showed. I can’t blame him -- I think I’d probably pass out if I had to sing in front of Baekho and Solar. But his nerves made him short of breath, and he couldn’t properly support some of his high notes and had to go into falsetto. He also was going way too fast. In a later third of the performance, he seemed to struggle with agility, pausing on a sort of odd note in a vocal run. (Maybe that’s what it was supposed to sound like? I admit I don’t know the song perfectly.) He still sounded beautiful, despite those slight problems, and I think that was mostly nerves.

Yeonso was a bit of a mystery going into this performance, since his teaser track had such heavy backup vocals that I couldn’t really be sure what was live. In this performance, he did a good job and had a lot of power. He has a very clean voice, if a bit thin, with good power and breath support, and I think “all-round” describes him well since I think his voice could jive with anyone’s. Except I guess Taewoo’s. I guess that compared to the more interesting voices of the other three, he fades out a little. Also, I basically couldn’t get a shot of him with his eyes open, because they were closed 90% of the time when he was singing. Open your eyes, guys! I'll give you a prize. I'm telling no lies! Just open your eyes.

The harmonies sounded great and I wished there were a few more of them.

I’m not really sure who I’d pick as top tier. Each had a lot of pros and a few cons. Part of me wants to say Minseo since I just like his voice best, but then I think Sanghyun is the one I walked away wanting to hear a whole song from… so maybe Sanghyun.

The MNET edit makes it clear how much everyone likes Sanghyun’s sweet voice, but they also like Taewoo’s -- they call it “chic”, which I think is fair. Maybe that’s kind of what I meant by saying it was a YG voice. They like the two trainees’ voices too, and they should, they’re good singers.

And as the song draws to a close, the translations do too. I looked and looked on Youtube for a clip of this section, but couldn’t find it, so thanks, Youtube. Thootube. At least google-translate-camera is always here for us.

Jaehwan says, “This team is awesome!” They get a “barrage of applause” and Gwangseok backstage says they did great. Everyone agrees that the ending was great, and they were very stable.

Random members of the groups were missing. I think while the performances were going on, they may have been being photographed for their official photos, in another room.

Dahee tells Baekho that should could tell from his facial expressions how much he enjoyed the performance. He agrees.

Baekho enjoying the singing. I think. I guess?

Baekho says, “The charm of each voice is different. Each time the part changed, the joy was incredible.” I get what he’s saying, though that wasn’t quite my experience here. (fun fact: google translate calls Baekho “White tiger judge,” which I love.) Sanghyun caught his attention with the intro. Backstage, Woong and Wumuti agree.

VCG says, “In the beginning, that ooh yeah part, that’s really difficult.” Jaehwan agrees, adding, “Right, because once that first note goes out, it’s over.” VCG goes on to to compliment Sanghyun’s precise pitch -- he was eating CDs, y’all. “I can hear all of your efforts,” he says, “and I bought into the song because of you.”

Solar speaks to Taewoo, complimenting his “unique technique and tone. It suited this song very well.”

As she compliments him, Taewoo closes his eyes in relief. He looks a tiny bit like he might cry. Aww! Taewoo is lovable, I find. Well, I think most of these guys are. Anyone who wants to be a singer is somehow lovable to me.

She tells them all they did a great job -- it was a beautiful stage.

VCG takes some time to call out the two trainees, that he had low expectations but he was wrong because they did well. No mention of Minseo rushing the beat -- I guess they only yell at Bitsaeon for that. Regardless, the praise well deserved. They say thank you and bow.

White Tiger Judge (Baekho) adds that Minseo’s pronunciation is so cool, which is extra funny if you remember how hard of a time Minseo had with the English word “underestimate” in his teaser. (I’m not really making fun of him -- foreign languages are hard, and the rest of his pronunciation was so good that it really emphasized that one mistake.)

Both Baekho and VCG also heap more praise on Yunseo, telling him his voice is “pretty and precious.”

Overall, the team suited the song, and it was all beautiful. But now they have to pick a top tier. Who will it be?

Baekho, Eunkwang, and Jaehwan vote for Lim Sanghyun. Solar votes for Taewoo, and VCG votes for Jeong Yunseo. So Sanghyun wins!

Sanhyun says he really didn’t expect it. He says his team talked about it and decided it didn’t matter who was top tier -- they just wanted to create a beautiful stage. He says he feels like he was chosen as the top tier because of his teammates, and he thanks them sincerely.

Aww, that’s some nice team building you got going there! It’d be a shame if someone were to come along and.... fuck that all up!

Dahee says that Sanghyun had told her/the producers/someone that he wasn’t sure if he’d continue with music or not, so she thanks the judges, saying she hopes it will encourage him to continue. Jaehwan is like, hey, we worked together not that long ago! What do you mean, you were thinking of quitting music? Everyone laughs.

Sanghyun says that he really loves music and wants to continue making it. (The subtitles come back, thank god!) He just wasn’t sure if he’d be able to make it as a singer, as opposed to a behind-the-scenes person. So Build Up is a good opportunity for him.

Beautiful team leaves the stage, and the judges say that even though they gave the standing ovation to the Don’t Go, Don’t Go team, Solar says she liked this team better. The judges all tease each other for not giving this team a standing ovation too.

And since that’s the end of the performances, I think I’ll wrap up this post here. In the next one, I’ll do a brief wrap up of the pre4 mission, then later on I'll cover the whole top tier, middle tier, low tier stuff, you know, the part where they fuck up all the team building, and that will take us into episode 3. See you then!

#bpr recaps build up #mnet build up #build up mnet #build up

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bitletsanddrabbles · 2 years

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From the Scrap Pile

Came home early from work today. Bad habit, I should stop it, but ergh. Slow season is slow....and slowly driving me crazy. Anyway, end result is that I'm trying to guess what my cat wants (except for 'something else') and trying to poke my brain into writing a few sentences on something.

So far all I've done is decided to scrap one of the Poly!Thomas Modern AU pieces I'd had a premise for, but no actual plot. I may revisit it at some point, once I've...you know...figured out what I'm doing with that 'verse....possibly actually finished a thing... but this version isn't worth fussing over.

I do like this bit, though. It's what actually prompted me to start the story in the first place, so before I move the file away and forget about it, I figured I'd post it here:

Guy lounged next to the pool, basking in the California sun. His doctor had warned him a million times about skin cancer and yes, he knew, but he couldn’t help himself. He simply loved the sun. The end result was, of course, that he also had sunscreen that was practically prescription strength. He heard the door to the house slide open, then shut, and looked up. “Oh, hello,” he greeted, mildly surprised. He’d known who it was, of course. There were only two other people with keys to the house, and one of them was on a plane. “I wasn’t expecting you.”

Myrna padded barefoot across to the pool, apparently oblivious to how hot the tiles were. Her new love of early Hollywood fashion didn’t extend to swimwear, apparently, because she was wearing a perfectly modern bikini. She shrugged and dropped into the lounge chair next to him. “I would have called, but I fig’red I own ‘alf the ‘ouse, and with Thomas gone, you’d probably be all by your lonesome.” She helped herself to a bottle of sparkling water out of the cooler sitting between them. “I can go, if you want.”

“Mm, I don’t mind.” Guy smiled, laying back again and closing his eyes. “As you said, you own half of the house.” Technically they had a floating timeshare on the house in Hancock park and they traded off who lived there based on who was in California at the time. They each had rooms marked as ‘theirs’, even when they were gone, and in instances like this one where they were both in town, they generally acted as house mates. This time, however, Myrna had agreed to take a hotel and give Guy some privacy with his new boyfriend.

Thomas had gotten on a plane back to England that morning, however, his generous holiday leave having run out, leaving Guy to his own devices until he found more work or the interest in ‘The Gambler’ died down enough that he could stop giving interviews and make it back to his estate in Yorkshire. He rather hoped it was the latter. He didn’t want to test his relationship with Thomas that heavily in the first few months. Still, in the meantime he was, as Myrna had put it, all by his lonesome. “Did you want to move in for a bit?” he offered. “Stop paying for a room when you have a perfectly good one here?”

“I wouldn’t say no,” the actress replied with an audible shrug. “’Ow long you planing on staying then?”

“Not long, if I can help it.”

Apparently following his earlier thought process, Myrna guessed, “Back to England as fast as you can?”

Guy just smiled in reply.

“Says a lot when you’ve found a guy who means more to you than the sun and a pool.”

“It does.”

For awhile the two of them simply sat, enjoying the quiet. There were birds out there, somewhere, although the seagull was the only one Guy could identify. When Myrna did break the silence, her voice was a lazy, sun drenched drawl. “What do you see in ‘im?”

Guy opened his eyes and sat up a bit, giving her a puzzled look. “Who, Thomas?” When she nodded in return, he helped himself to a drink and settled back against the lounger, still frowning. “I never thought I’d have to explain that to you,” he muttered, feeling oddly betrayed. He and Myrna weren’t the closest of friends, perhaps, but they’d worked together enough to buy this house and spark rumors of a deeper relationship through all of the gossip networks. He’d have thought she’d have known him well enough not to question.

“You don’t ‘ave to,” Myrna protested, her voice still calm. “I’m jus’ curious is all.” She paused, then explained, “If anyone else walked up to me with Thomas Barrow in tow and said ‘’ere now, this man has two boyfriends already, but I’m going to date ‘im anyway’, I’d take one look at those cheekbones and say ‘Of course you are’ and that would be that.”

The mouthful of water Guy had just taken nearly wound up sprayed across the pool deck, possibly into the pool itself.

#downton abbey #downton abbey fanfiction #guy dexter #myrna dalgleish #frank discussion of thomas's cheekbones

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lifeofa-fangirl · 2 years

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PSA: Sorry for the long rant. I just have a few thoughts about The Loneliest I need to share before other people's opinions cloud my brain.

Spoiler alert to start this off: I am a 90s kid. I was a young teen in the late 90s (yes, I’m that old) when Aerosmith wrote I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing, Green Day came out with Good Riddance and Goo Goo Dolls released Iris. I like to think I know a thing or two about rock ballads. Does that mean I think The Loneliest compares to any of these songs? No. Simply because I think Måneskin doesn’t compare to these bands. Because while I would qualify all these band under the general term of rock music, all four are very different. So I don’t think it’s really possible or fair to compare them.

That being said, I did always say that rockers write the best ballads. And I stand by that. For after just a few listens, I don’t think that it’s the best song they ever made, but I do think it’s a good song. And dear god, it’s definitely such a major step upwards from first listening to Supermodel.

Based on the snippets we got, I wanted to wait to listen until after work because of the mood, so I’ve been avoiding IG and Tumblr and everybody else’s opinion today. Then this afternoon I couldn’t wait anymore and I decided to take a short break to listen to it at my desk. Definitely a mistake on my part, because the dark vibe? I feel it and I feel it hard. I can’t really explain why, but this one really gets to me. Chills. Let’s just say I was glad nobody came to talk to me in the next 15 minutes, haha.

Musically, I like the difference between the verses and the chorus very much. The way the song builds and you can feel it go crescendo towards the chorus, yes please. This is my kind of song. The kind of song that gets stuck in my head for a long time after a listen.

Also, I’ll say it now and I’ll say a million times over: put Thomas in the spotlight more, cause that guitar solo! More of this please. It came very unexpected to me at the first listen, cause I think it’s quite a different sound in the whole of the song, but I’m a big fan.

I am not a fan of the double voice thing that happens at some point, but that’s just a second or two in 4 minutes (which yes, as weird as it may sound, I am happy with the length), so I won’t fall over it.

Lyrically? I honestly think this might be my favorite English song of theirs so far. It is no Paura Del Buio or Torna A Casa obviously. But writing in a language that in not your own is so so hard and I feel like so much progress has been made. IWBYS and For Your Love, they are great songs. But lyrically, as in a story being told and unfolded, the way they are build? I definitely do enjoy this one better.

Lastly, I wanna say that I am curious about a live version of this song. (And no, I haven’t heard or seen any footage from the London show) Because while it feels less produced than Supermodel, I do feel that they could and should tone down production further. And I’ve discussed this with people before (you know who you are ;)): in my opinion, Måneskin are a better band live than in the studio. So I look forward to seeing and hearing this live as well.

In conclusion: It’s not perfect and I definitely need to hear a live version, but I’m a fan of this song, for all the reasons above. And I believe it will grow further on me to more I hear it.

#lore rambles #my two cents #måneskin #the loneliest

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lgcdowoon · 2 years

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LGC CAFE PERFORMANCES : sometime in late january SET LIST : i.o.u by agito, late autumn by kim youngim feat. agito’s jiho, eat by zion.t, soulmate by zico feat. iu, beautiful goodbye by v&a COUNT : 906 words

“hello! if you don’t know me, i’m type zero’s dowoon and i’m here today to perform a few songs for you all.” he introduced with a bright smile and wave as he stood in front of the microphone on the stage they had in the cafe for these performances.

“i wanted to take this chance to perform songs you that wouldn’t typically hear from me, so i hope you enjoy. i’ll be starting with a couple songs by some of my favorite artists at the moment. i’m sure most of you will likely know them.” he figured most of the people that showed up to the legacy cafe were fans of legacy artists, so he thought starting out with legacy songs would be a good hook. he also wanted any excuse to sing as many agito songs as he possibly could.

as the opening chords of i.o.u began, dowoon put on his game face. this song was cute and sweet, but he had to focus as he rapped. rapping was a skill he was still working on and he didn’t want to make himself look like a fool. however, when once he got to the first singing part he let himself relax and really express the bright and heartwarming feeling of the song. as he sang “my babe” during the chorus, his eyes danced around the crowd with a smile on his lips, even winking at a table in the back that he could see were quietly singing along.

the music transitioned to late autumn and dowoon had worried about this song. it was originally by a female vocalist, so he had to lower the register for himself. he had considered switching it for a different song, but decided to stick with it. it was a challenge to reach the notes he needed to, especially since he had been focusing on rapping as of late, but he did his best to not strain his voice too much. he really liked the song (and not only because his idol was featured on it) and thought the song fit the vibe of the cafe performances well. he was a lot more stationary than he had been in the first song, but occasionally air-drummed to the music.

done with his first set of songs, he took a sip of water and put the microphone back on the stand. “these next couple of songs are a little bit older, then i’ll be ending with a song that i think is fitting to say goodbye with...but you’ll have to stay and find out why!” he teased before taking another sip of water.

at the beginning of eat he tried adding his own flavor by saying hello with a shy wave to the audience. he tried to sing like he was talking genuinely to each member of the little audience around the stage. the song was really sweet and cute and personal, so he tried to emulate that energy with his version of it.

soulmate was the first song he had decided to use. he had been scrolling through his playlists after being informed he was able to participate in this round of lgc cafe performances, and it had instantly jumped out as perfect for the vibe he wanted. it was jazzy and light. again, he struggled to hit the notes that the female artist did with ease--but he did his best. again he had rap parts that he had to put a lot of energy into to not get lost in the verses. despite it being his first pick, he was most unsatisfied with his performance on it as he finished the song. if the audience had any complaints, though, he couldn’t tell and just smiled as brightly as he could.

he had decided pretty early on what he wanted his finale to be, beautiful goodbye was one of his favorite vna songs. it was a bit different from the other songs, but dowoon hoped it would leave an energetic lasting impression on the audience. he tried to emulate by moving a lot more than he had, jumping up and down slightly with the beat. then, when the music slowed, he did the same and intimately rapped/sang to the crowd. dowoon liked being able to jump back and forth between the two, the music decided how he should act.

as beautiful goodbye ended he settled back into the center of the stage, a bright smile on his face as he took a proper breath and another sip of water. “phew, that was fun! i hope you all had a good time as well?” he offered and took a long gulp of water. that left him more tired than he thought he would be. he heard some claps and cheers which was all he needed for his smile to grow wider. “thank you all for your time. i was worried about performing songs that are different from what i and type zero usually do, but i’m happy to see some people enjoyed the different flavor.” he said, before adding, “if you didn’t catch it before, i am type zero’s maknae, dowoon. we have some exciting things coming soon, so please look out for us. thank you, again.” he bowed and then waved as he walked off the stage and onto the next schedule--a smile still on his face as the effects of stage euphoria were still hitting him. he really loved performing.

#lgc:cafeperformances #file under : solo #this is a lee jiho stan account and nothing else

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sentientquillbeast · 2 years

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This looks as chaotic as he is HSGDHSHD

1. The GUN Truck-Sonic Adventure 2/Sonic Generations

2. Edward Elric-Fullmetal Alchemist

3. Mugen-Samurai Champloo

4. Rocky-Lackadaisy

5. Deadpool-Deadpool

6. Wander-Wander Over Yonder

Tagged by: @cutpursecavalier

Tagging: Whoever sees this and wants to do it because Idk that many OC blogs and all the ones I do know are already tagged or have done this 😔

Not all of these are direct inspirations- some of them are characters that in hindsight reminded me of Storm and now I can’t help but think of them in relation to him. Further details about each one under the cut! (it’s a long one because Idk how to shut up)

1- The GUN Truck. Yes this is not a character but it was a very direct inspiration to Storm as he is now SHDGSH. Storm started out in a main verse that was more of a mix of the games and Sonic SatAM. And then a bit later on, on iScribble (houghhh) a RP got started where OCs worked for GUN. So I made an ‘Agent Storm’ au for Storm. He was more chaotic and zany than his then-main verse counterpart- since this RP started out as a shitposty chat RP. The Sonic Generations trailer that showed off the insane GUN Truck with the buzzsaws had also recently come out, so I decided to make his role as the person insane enough to drive that thing.

As time went on the silly little chat RP ended up having actual serious plots, and as ‘Agent Storm’ developed I ended up liking him much more than his then-main verse version, so he ended up becoming the new main-verse.

I don’t think he’d quite be what he is now if it wasn’t for that initial bit of ‘who would be crazy enough to drive that truck. With the buzzsaws specifically. THIS GUY’

So now whenever I see that truck I also can’t help but think ‘MY BLORBO IS DRIVING THAT!!!’ I’ve cursed my friends with these same thoughts towards it HSGDHSGD

2- Edward Elric- They’re shorter than those around them and angry about it, smart (though Storm keeps that on the downlow) and they’re little shits that have actually experienced too much at too young an age. Fight-wise they��re both good at making plans on the spot, and get in trouble that leads to a broken prosthetic too often. Though fortunately for Storm, he’s his own mechanic

How prosthetics work in FMA was a basis to how Storm’s own prosthetics work-including him needing one made of different materials in the winter. That was my favorite detail about it. I feel like other series didn’t really think ‘that cool robot arm/leg is metal and it’s connected right to the flesh- that’s not a good combo for winter’- I didn’t think of that until FMA either because I was too lost in the ‘robot arm cool’ sauce

Lastly Storm also has a tendency to befriend his enemies- which is in general a shonen trope I know, and not the last one that can apply to him

3- Mugen-Like Ed, he is a lil shit. But a lethal lil shit-- not that Ed couldn’t be, he just avoids that. Storm does also avoid it when he can, so he’s more like a mix of the two. Can be very lethal, largely avoids it, but Will kill if he sees it as something he has to do

I watched Samurai Champloo in a period where I was trying to figure out how to write fight scenes and what kinda fighting style Storm’d have- Mugen is a skilled swordsman that starts shit fully confident he can finish it (and often does), with people falling for any bait he sets because they underestimate him due to how undisciplined he acts. All these can be applied to Storm- and the most direct inspiration was how he fights by incorporating breakdancing in his moves whether he’s using a sword or not

4-Rocky- I made Storm a bit before I started reading Lackadaisy. But once I started reading it, he was one of those ‘oh man he reminds me of Storm so much. How did I make such a similar character omg’ situations. Cheshire grin cats that are magnets for trouble, and get into things they prrrobably shouldn’t. Goofs in the kinda businesses you wouldn’t expect, honestly

This is a more recent development but- for years I wouldn’t be able to find any kinda voice claim for Storm. I’d find ones for the very rare cases where he gets really serious, but nothing for ‘this is what Storm sounds like on the regular’

Until the voices for the upcoming Lackadaisy short animation got shown off. And Michael Kovach’s performance finally hit that ‘THATS IT THATS THE VOICE!!!’ spot. Like just imagine Rocky speaking with a southern accent and you have the way Storm’d speak

I can’t believe we’ve come full circle

5-Deadpool was a very direct inspiration for how Storm started out as ‘Agent Storm’. He was the ‘comedy relief guy’ in his unit, much to their annoyance, but he was still lethal. He seems to have no ‘mute’ button, and will crack jokes even in big dangerous situations. Storm dual wielding both guns and katanas at the time was because of Deadpool. And while ‘guy that can be either a hero or a villain depending on who you ask, works by his own set of morals that no one knows, maybe not even him’ kinda developed on it’s own, it probably still was my brain drawing bits and pieces from that initial Deadpool inspiration.

6- Wander. This is 100% one of those ‘in hindsight these characters are so similar in some ways’ and this year when I re-watched WoY I couldn’t help but think of Storm, especially with the development of his friendship with @cyanide-coffee’s V. They’re both fuzzy lil universe traveling guys that are best friends/family with a grumpy gnc horse lizard that can and will kill for them HSGDSHHD

While Storm isn’t such a pacifist and in fact LOVES to fight, at his core he just wants to help people where he can, sometimes to his own detriment. And sometimes it comes in the form of him annoying people with attempts to be friendly @ them.

And deep, deep down, buried and hidden away, that desire to help people when they need it comes from a scared little kid that needed some help of his own

(No I’ll never recover from that episode, why do you ask)

#Blog games #(( If you read all that- thank you or I'm sorry--))

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poppypickle · 2 years

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Fic Masterlist

I’ve been meaning to do this for a while now, so here’s a masterlist of all the fic I have written for The Rookie (Chenford), Avengers (Clintasha), The Hunger Games, Harry Potter, and Community. As Hamilton would say: What is a legacy? Making hot fictional characters bang in your fics, obviously.

The Rookie (Tim/Lucy)

I Can’t Help Myself - Complete, 11k

Tim and Lucy figure things out with a little help from the Mid-Wilshire gang. Featuring silly group texts, Angela playing matchmaker, and Chenford doing Wopez wedding errands.

Come A Little Closer - Complete, 30k

Tim and Lucy make a bet about who can seduce the other person first. Mutually assured seduction occurs.

Want You To Stay - Complete, 50k

Co-written with @cfr749. Things *happen* after Tim and Lucy leave the hospice in 4x09. A Season 4 canon divergent AU.

Break Up With Him - Complete, 6k

Lucy’s got a boyfriend and Tim is jealous. So jealous he maybekindasorta acts like a fool at Angela’s wedding.

Got Me Addicted - Rated E, 1.5k

The dirty PWP version of Lucy having a boyfriend and Tim doing something about it at Angela’s wedding.

Bang Bang (Look What You Started) - Rated E, 9k

What if Tim and Lucy actually gave into all their Season 1 chemistry?

Made You Wait - One-shot, 4k

Lucy goes undercover and Tim pines.

Ain’t It Just Like Love To Find Us - One-shot, 1.5k

Another Wopez wedding dance fic, because there can never be enough.

Broken Over You - One-shot, 1.7k

Lucy stops by Tim’s place to say goodbye to Kojo before she goes undercover.

Chenford Fic Week Series - Rest Your Head On Me, My Dear - 53k

I had this crazy idea to do ALL of the Chenford Fic Week prompts, but to break up each day into a different period of time in their lives. So I started writing, and realized pretty quickly that I’m actually a very slow writer and couldn’t possibly finish 42(!) prompts. But I kept running with the idea, and luckily some AMAZING collaborators decided to join in on the fun. We didn't quite finish all of the prompts, but I think the spirit of the original idea was still achieved.

Most of these ficlets can loosely exist in the same ‘verse, and are meant to paint a full picture of Tim and Lucy’s lives and their relationship.

July 11: Tim and Lucy as children July 12: As adults before the meet each other July 13: The rookie/TO days July 14: Post-rookie/TO — close friends and very flirty, but they are not *officially* together yet July 15: All AU ‘verse! Lucy is a famous pop star and Tim is her new head of security July 16: Tim and Lucy finally admit their feelings for each other July 17: Married Chenford 🥰

Avengers (Clint/Natasha)

Let Me Tell You a Story About War - One-shot, 10k

Natasha goes to Clint right after the Snap. Some things change. Some things stay the same.

Let's Show 'Em - One-shot, 1.5k

Clint had told Natasha that wearing her full tactical jumpsuit was overkill, but Lila had insisted it was absolutely necessary. And Natasha was nothing if not a pushover for the favorite bonus niece.

Or, Lila Barton has a score to settle.

Just Come Home - One-shot, 2k

Monsters and magic and multiverses…

And somehow he’s ended up living in the version of life where Natasha Romanoff is dead.

Or, Clint attempts to cope.

Run Away Now - One-shot, 3k

Clint Barton has a fianceé and Natasha doesn't know what to do with that.

Somebody Save Me (From the World You Left) - One-shot, 2k

Prompt: Cooper always knew about his father's and Aunt Nat's relationship.

The Hunger Games

Let Me Name The Stars For You - One-shot, 10k

Gale/Johanna. This is the story of how the Hawthorne family puts Johanna back together again. Or maybe it's the other way around. Post-Mockingjay.

Kaleidoscope Heart - Complete, 10k

Gale/Johanna. Two bruised and battered souls figure out how to rebuild. Post-Mockingjay.

i’m five years too old to lie to myself and call it honor - One-shot, 500 words

Gale-centric. Based on the prompt: “Angry, and half in love with her, and tremendously sorry, I turned away.”

The Old Familiar Sting - One-shot, 4k

A series of vignettes that take place the night before Katniss leaves for the Quarter Quell. Featuring Gale/Katniss, Peeta, Haymitch, and Mrs. Everdeen.

Stranger - One-shot 1.5k

A missing scene between Gale and Katniss. Takes place after their kiss, but before Katniss leaves for the Victory Tour.

Harry Potter (Harry/Hermione)

Could You Leave Me With A Scar - One-shot, 1.5k

Harry/Hermione. Hermione Granger's got scars. Five vignettes from Hermione's life.

This Is My Winter Song To You - Ficlet, 800 words

Harry/Hermione. 'I could have loved you,' she wants to tell him. 'If given half the chance.' Takes place after Ron returns and destroys the locket.

let us go then, you & i - Ficlet, 300 words

Prompt: Harry/Hermione - movie!verse - "I'll come with you"

Community (Jeff/Annie)

The Song Remains The Same - One-shot, 3k

Jeff/Annie. It's like deja vu on steroids - the other timelines begin to seep into Annie's subconscious. Spoilers for Remedial Chaos Theory.

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bts-weverse-trans · 4 years

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210104 Weverse Magazine ‘Be’ Comeback Interview - Suga

SUGA “I'm grateful that there are still unvisited areas in the world of music” BTS BE comeback interview 2021.01.04

SUGA has this way of talking passionately with a deadpan look on his face. Full of passion about his life and music.

How is your shoulder? SUGA: Good. I think it’ll get even better once I take off this brace. Apparently, it takes several months for a full recovery, but I'm trying to get better as fast as possible.

How does it feel like to have resolved a problem that has distressed you for long? SUGA: First of all, I'm glad. The pain is one thing, but when my shoulders got worse, I couldn't even raise my arms. But when I heard that this might recur when getting the surgery at a young age, I waited for the right time and had decided to get it done early next year regardless of the COVID-19 situation. I had planned to get the surgery after the year-end stages, but I got it done this year (2020) because my doctors advised me to start preparing early for next year’s promotions and activities.

How does it feel like watching the other members doing promotions? SUGA: I can't say it feels great. I could see the emptiness because we've been together as a group of seven for so long. Not necessarily because I'm not there but because something that should be there is missing?

Is that what made you join the promotion as much as possible? You shot lots of video footage in advance and you even appeared in the Mnet “2020 MAMA” through VR. SUGA: Fake SUGA (Laughs). There’s this 3D studio where we shot it. I shot, scanned, and acted there, but couldn't see the actual result at the studio. I thought a sense of displacement was unavoidable, and that was exactly the case. (Laughs) I acted normal because it would have been aired anyway even if I hadn’t had the surgery, but it seems a lot because it’s aired after the surgery.

You must feel restricted not being able to go on stage. SUGA: The thing is, it's only been a month after I got surgery, but my absence on stage is so apparent. But my doctors keep telling me that I shouldn't be impatient and in fact, many athletes get a resurgery when they return to the field without proper rehabilitation. So I'm working on trying to care less. For the first two weeks after surgery, I felt so frustrated that I tried out new things. I even watched movies I didn't watch.

What movies did you watch? SUGA: I watched ‘Samjin Company English Class’ as it happened to be on IPTV, and now I have ‘Tenet’ on my list. ‘Parasite’ was the last movie I saw at a cinema. As the social distancing measures became stricter, I haven’t been going outside, except going to the hospital. I even eat at home. I'm also watching a lot of TV nowadays. Watching music shows like ‘Sing Again’, ‘Folk Us’, and ‘Show Me The Money 9’ made me think of what I should do in the upcoming days.

Could you elaborate on that? SUGA: A lot of candidates on ‘Sing Again’ are very talented but hadn't had the opportunity, and on ‘Folk Us’, I noticed that many took their own guitars on stage. I started playing the guitar lately and I'm having this urge to broaden my scope of music. And since my interest in the music industry in the U.S. grew, I'm getting prepared, studying English and all.

What fueled your interest? SUGA: In some ways it’s the most commercially developed market. You could lose the industry attention in a flash if it's not feasible. So in this system, you would try everything and that would be an efficient way. I want to do music for a long time, and to this end, I always want to learn more about the global music industry because I want to do music that’s loved not only in Korea, but also in the U.S., Japan and Europe.

Speaking of which, it seems BE was influenced from music of the past rather than today's trends. SUGA: I especially like impromptu music. I love the songs that were made in one take instead of being recorded several times. In this era of crossover genres, the desire to do better in music is growing inside me.

As the genres become more blended, the melody you use must be more important. Does starting to play the guitar affect your composing in any way? SUGA: I always liked using guitar sounds. And I have always liked the Eagles. If you play the guitar, it’s way easier to write songs because you can carry it along wherever you go, pluck on the strings to create melody lines. Keyboards are difficult to carry around. (Laughs) I usually work on my laptop but I had this thought that I definitely needed an instrument. It accelerates my work and improves my understanding of chords.

It makes me think you could intuitively make melodies. SUGA: It’s easier to write a song because you can intuitively make a progression and try many different things. During my work on ‘Eight’, IU had recorded and sent me a song from her phone. At the time I couldn’t play the guitar, so we tried to make sure we’re working on the same page when keeping track of each other's progress. That made me feel the need to learn an instrument.

This is actually before you started playing the guitar, but I found ‘Telepathy’ in BE very interesting. The varying melodic progressions between hooks for each member made me wonder if you wrote the melody intuitively for each part. SUGA: I tried writing a melody for the first time this year (2020), and as I started knowing the fun of music, it opened a lot of new doors for me. So it was kind of easy working on it. I just played a beat and wrote from the beginning until the end. Done. I wrote it in just 30 minutes. The song almost wrote itself. The trends of pop and hip-hop these days cross boundaries between vocals and rap. I like this trend.

When I listen to your singing, it feels like you’re hitting the beats rather than singing along the notes. So I thought perhaps you're singing as if you're rapping. SUGA: When you're rapping, you just think of the rhythm, so it’s like simply putting on a melody to a rhythm. To define which comes first, I think melody adds to it while writing the rap.

In ‘Life Goes On’, the lyrics ‘Thankfully between you and me, nothing’s changed’ are somewhere in between. It's not rap but it’d be mundane to say it's a mere melody. SUGA: There are obviously songs where the rap needs to be highlighted. For example, in ‘Dis-ease’ or ‘Ugh!’, you have to be good at rap. But in songs that should be easy to listen to, impressive raps are not always the way to go. Sometimes, you want smooth transitions without obstacles.

In that sense, the rap flow of ‘Blue & Grey’ was impressive. Rather than a dramatic effect that emphasizes each part, you extended the rap just as much as the slowing beat. SUGA: To be honest, this beat is difficult to rap to. The beginning of the song only has a guitar line, which made it even more difficult. I participated when we wrote lyrics for ‘Blue & Grey’ and I've always wanted to work on a song like this. It was because verse 1 talks about the theme of the song.

It seems you achieved almost everything that you wanted in BE. SUGA: I think it took less than a week to make my part in the album. After having written one or two melodies for ‘Life Goes On’, I wrote a version complete with rap, and liked it that I even worked on a separate arrangement and lyrics. Rather than pondering over the ways that might work, I choose to simply play the music and write.

Many creators are unsure even after they’ve produced good work. How do you get the conviction to release your work? SUGA: Many musicians are unsure whether they should release their music or not. It was the same for me, but the thing is, you’ll never release anything if you nitpick everything. For example, if we release 10 songs, we have a chance to unveil them in concerts or fan events. And sometimes, as we listen to the song, we think, ‘Why does this part that had bothered me no longer bother me?’ Some things might feel awkward at some point, but in time, it no longer feels awkward. Even I forget about it. So it's more efficient to fine tune, looking at the big picture, rather than thinking too much about the details. On top of that, during promotions, I don’t have the time to pick tracks that others have sent for 10 hours. It would be a success for all of us if each of us play and write a melody in their own time and collaborate with others on the details. So the way of songwriting has evolved in many aspects.

What motivated such evolution? SUGA: I think it evolved naturally. I've changed in personality this year (2020), as well as in terms of my interpretation and attitude toward life to the extent that I almost thought I've been rehearsing. How would it feel like if there were no stage to go to or anyone looking out for me? This thought made me realize the value of these things.

In ‘Dis-ease’, you sing ‘I don’t know if it’s the world that's sick’. Was it this lifestyle that changed your thoughts about your work? SUGA: Yes. When I was young, I had embraced the belief that ‘It must be my fault’, but as I got older, I realized that this is not always true. Most of what I had thought was my fault was in fact, not my fault. On the other hand, there are things that I did well and times I had been lucky.

‘I NEED U’ came out during a time when you were still thinking, “It must be me”. After the members put on a stage with ‘I NEED U’ in KBS' ‘Song Festival’, you wrote on Weverse, “It’s the same as five years ago.” How would you compare with back then? (This interview was held on December 19, 2020.) SUGA: We've matured quite a bit. And our stage performances have become more natural. I still like ‘I NEED U’. Just listening to the beat makes me sentimental, and above all, the song came out nicely. So as I was watching this and that when I stumbled across old videos. Watching them made me think that we haven’t changed much.

In what aspect haven't you changed much? SUGA: Before the social distancing measures got stricter, I talked with the photographer for BE, whom I had met four years ago. The photographer was surprised that we hadn’t changed much after all the success, even though he had assumed we’d be very different.

I'm amazed personally. I’ve had the chance to meet the members before your debut, but from your way of talking with members or others, it seems you haven't changed. SUGA: I think it's because we don’t give it a big deal about success. For example, it's incredible to be ranked first on the Billboards, but there’s also this sense of, “Okay, and?”

Even the Grammys? (Laughs) SUGA: When we got nominated for the Grammy Awards, we thought, ‘Is this real?’ (Laughs) Of course we were delighted, but it didn’t make us think, ‘We're singers nominated for the Grammy.’ If you're nominated, you're nominated, and if you get the award, you get the award. You don't get shaken by that. I know it's a great award and would be so grateful if we receive it, but we know that nothing is possible without the tremendous support of our fans. What’s more important is that the fans are more flattered than us when we receive a great award. So everyone's rejoicing, but it’s like, ‘Let's do what we have to do.’ We've been training ourselves to keep finding our places, so no one remains overexcited.

In ‘Fly To My Room’, there are lyrics that say, ‘This room is too small to contain my dream’, and ‘Sometimes this room becomes an emotional trash can, but it embraces me.’ I had this feeling that the room had been such a place and that you were accepting that you have changed. Then the essence must have remained the same. SUGA: It wasn’t easy to accept that we eventually change. But I think it's a good thing that we changed. What we did back then was possible only at that time, and we could change because of the things we had accomplished.

Then, what new things are you dreaming about? SUGA: I'm eager to continue doing music. Since all performances were canceled due to COVID-19, I had a chance to talk to so many musicians in Korea. I talked with legendary singers as well as people who are my contemporaries. Talking with them once again made me realize that I love music so much. Because music is my profession, I can’t imagine myself not doing it. I'm grateful that there are still unvisited areas in the world of music.

What kind of music do you think you’ll be engaged in in the future? SUGA: I was greatly motivated when I saw the concert of Na Hoon-a last Chuseok . I wondered how many musicians would actually be able perform and write music for so long like he has. At that moment, it occurred to be that ‘I want to be like him’. He has passion and desire, and most of all, he is a superstar. A few years ago, I took my parents to a Na Hoon-a concert, and when they watched the performance last Chuseok, they said it was way less impressive to see him perform through the TV. (Laughs)

That must explain your interest in a broader spectrum of music from instruments to composing and musical genres. Because you want to be doing this for a long time. SUGA: My goal is to continue doing music in any shape or form. In that sense, I have this great respect toward Cho Yong-pil. He takes the best sound there is and reinterprets it into his own. I think that’s something I want to emulate and keep changing and evolving so that I can continue doing music for decades to come.

The lyrics ‘Thankfully between you and me nothing’s changed’ must sound more meaningful for the fans because they will be listening to your music for a long time. SUGA: A month and a half in the current times must seem like a lifetime for the fans when we're far apart. I feel the same. But I think that's proof that we worked hard for the past seven years and that the fans have been passionately reaching out to us. I'm striving to get to them as fast as I can, and I'm eager to go on stage. I'm going through this because I want to be better on stage in a better condition, so don't be sad, and please hang in there a little longer.

Trans © Weverse

#bangtan #yoongi #weverse #weverse magazine #Be Album #comeback interview #210104 #2021

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beenalark · 2 years

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Okay am I actually deranged or does Morrissey's cover of Moon River just speak Marrissey? Yes I know Morrissey did not write the lyrics, he only added some, but then again, he wouldn't cover a song if its lyrics didn't resonate with him. Like please just have a look and hear me out. I'm skipping the first verse cause it's not very specific in terms of Marrissey, but the following ones are really interesting.

Oh, dream maker - Johnny and Moz meeting, dreaming together and Johnny helping Morrissey's dreams come true.

You heartbreaker - this can be about Morrissey meeting Angie and learning to live with the thought that the boy he fell in love with is taken. I don't think this has to do with the breakup of the Smiths, because the song generally suits the beginning of their relationship more.

Wherever you're going/I'm going your way - this reminds me of a moment in Morrissey's interview where he says: "It got to the stage where I was so impressed and infatuated, that even if he couldn’t play, it really didn’t matter…" That's the point where he stops following Johnny just for his musical dreams and instead wants to be with him, wherever he goes and whatever he does. In other words, "everything depends upon how near you stand to me".

Two drifters/Off to see the world - pretty self-explanatory, the start of their career, tours and such.

I'm not so sure the world/Deserves us - that's the lyric that was changed by Morrissey. The original version is more naive and optimistic - "There’s such a lot of world to see", so obviously it had to be changed. Morrissey admired Johnny more than any other musician (or possibly any other human being, for that matter). These lines show his protectiveness and loyalty to what they have, to their connection and Johnny himself. Again, reminds me of a quote, this time from Morrissey's autobiography, about the time Tony Wilson said something unpleasant about Johnny. Morrissey says: "The comment tests me in my new role as Johnny’s comrade, and I fail because I allow meat-fed Wilson to say his piece." Morrissey immediately puts Johnny on a pedestal, and Johnny helps him regard himself in the same way. The two of them are more than the world. Also, Hand in glove again? "If the people stare, then the people stare, I really don't know and I really don't care"? "The good people laugh"? "We've something they'll never have"? "Kiss my shades"? Just saying.

We're after/The same rainbow's end - self-explanatory too, meeting a person whose dreams and ambitions align with yours completely and setting off to fulfill them together.

How come it's just around the bend?/It's always just around the bend? - another change of original lyrics, which are "Waiting ‘round the bend/my huckleberry friend,/Moon River and me". Morrissey could never have all of it, and, although the Smiths were successful, they were never as successful as he envisioned and felt them worthy to be. Issues with the label, no airplay, those are the things that irked him and enraged him. They should be bigger, but they can't be, and it's not their fault. Can also be interpreted as a comment on their relationship with Johnny, all of those almost moments that happened, the thinnest barrier between friends and lovers never being broken. And once more, reminds of Hand in glove - "The good life is out there somewhere".

And just to finish this nicely, have a quote from Morrissey himself about this song, which I discovered only after writing all this mess and deciding to turn to some more reliable sources than my own mind: "The fulfilment promised in the song is always in the future, so it has this never-finding, ever-reaching feel. It's hard to sing only in the sense that you realise you're more familiar with it than you perhaps thought." :)

Well, that's the end of my nonsense! I'm pretty sure I could stuff this with more smiths quotes, but I'll just leave it at that and shut up now, you're welcome. Hope this makes at least some sense, if not, feel free to tell me I'm mad! <3

#oof #the smiths #morrissey #marrissey #moon river

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aminiatureworld · 3 years

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Affection II

Characters: Childe, Ganyu, Kaeya, gn!reader

Word Count: 5,577

Warnings: None

Premise: Sometime we know something is impossible from the start. But still we walk towards it, even if we know it will hurt us. It’s only flirting, only a smile or a hug or some food. Even if nothing comes of it, there is nothing to regret. Even if it hurts.

In which the reader gives affection, expecting nothing in return.

Author’s Note: Evidently I’ve really missed writing these properly. I had such a great time writing, and I hope you guys enjoy these just as much as I did.

Also I’ve decided the version on Ao3 will now always be without bullet points, so if you prefer that format the link will be in the reblog.

Childe

You’d been floored by Childe pretty much since the day you two had met.

What had turned into the two of you meeting had started out a most unfavorable encounter. You’d gone to Lingju Pass, trying to survey some of the carvings of the old structure, and attempting to see the sort of methods used to construct such vast rocky complexes at the time. Unfortunately this goal had quickly turned into a goal of “don’t get caught”, as you’d found the Pass crawling with Fatui members. Though you weren’t nearly helpless, you’d also not come prepared for battle; and had spent most of the “fight” dodging around various blows while trying not to drop the expensive equipment that you’d borrowed from other Guild members.

Just as you’d come to the conclusion that the options were either drop everything and run or get thoroughly injured by a bunch of arrogant Snezhnayan soldiers there was a change in the air. The Fatui soldiers’ expression turned from one of glee to one of confusion, and then one of panic, as one by one a streak of blue began to throw them this way and that. As you regained focus of the terrain your realized that it wasn’t a streak at all but a person, a person who was wildly adept at sword play. Eventually the number of unconscious people had risen to five, and there was no one left but him and you.

“Need any help?”

The words might’ve been kind, had it not been for the smirk on the man’s face. Though you felt that the right answers would’ve probably been to scowl, you found you couldn’t, too wrapped up in the memory of this mysterious person darting this way and that, handling his water-made daggers with the grace of a ballet dancer.

“I’m Childe.” These words finally brought you back to the present.

“You’re a member of the Fatui.”

“I am.”

“Then why did you knock those guys out just now?”

“Boredom.”

You stared at Childe incredulously. Of course you’d heard his name, the man who, it was whispered, almost pulled Liyue into the sea. You’d formed a sort of mental picture of him completely divorced from the redhead now standing in front of you, bouncing slightly on his feet as he smiled cockily. He looked more like a rogue adventurer than one of the heads of a crime syndicate. Maybe that was why you found yourself infatuated, rather than afraid.

This infatuation only grew, fed by the encounters that you had with Childe. It seemed now you couldn’t avoid him, not that you wanted to. What had begun as a chance encounter multiplied into two, into four; soon enough you two had struck up a sort of friendship, one that baffled everyone else around you.

Of course you hadn’t lost all your sense, knowing quite well that the puppy love you were feeling could never be anything more. The way Childe talked about his work, about his duty to the Tsaritsa, made it very clear that he wouldn’t let a partner in his life or in his loyalties. And even if he changed his mind, why would he choose you? You were an adventurer sure, but you hadn’t even been able to properly defend yourself the first time the two of you met, and your oversight of that would’ve surely turned Childe away. Besides, Childe could probably make a partner out of anyone he wanted, if they were foolish enough. Why should that person be you?

Perhaps it was that knowledge that allowed you to be so free in your affection, spurred on by Childe’s own open nature. Hand holding, hugging, leaning one’s head on the other’s shoulder, it was the language of friendship that you two had adopted, and something that you greatly appreciated. There was something nice about a friendship in which one could be so open about caring about someone, without expecting things to go farther. Because you didn’t, you really didn’t. And though that might’ve been a bit painful, it was a small price to pay for Childe’s company.

“I’m going off to Mondstadt for a bit.”

“What?”

You drew away from Childe a bit to look into his face. The two of you were walking along the path towards Yaoguang Shoal, as Childe had taken a particular liking to the Starconches that lined its shores. Now he smiled awkwardly, squeezing your hand and shrugging his shoulders.

“I know, I know. There’s apparently this branch of the Fatui holed up there right now, and I’ve been asked to consult about something, though archons know what it is.”

“How long will you be gone?”

“I’m not sure, I think about two weeks? I’m not sure what exactly is going on, but the troops really must be in disarray if they need me skulking around for the next two weeks.” He let out a awkward laugh.

“I’ll miss you.” You replied, bumping your head into his shoulder and frowning. “It’s very boring without you.”

“I’m sure you’ll be perfectly capable without me.” Childe smiled, one eyebrow raised slightly. “After all, what would you do if I left someday, permanently. You’d have to find a way without me.”

“Let’s not talk about that.” You replied hurriedly, switching the conversation towards something more pleasant. Unfortunately however the words had already been said, and the damage had already been done.

It had been two weeks since Childe had left for Mondstadt, and though normally you might’ve been waiting at the city gates for his return, you found yourself on the familiar road towards Lingju. Childe’s words had been ringing in your ears for the past two weeks, and you’d found the more time passed the more you kept thinking about them.

What would you do if I left someday, permanently. Is that what Childe truly wanted? To leave? The idea made your stomach hurt, as you began once more to run all your interactions through your head, as if trying to find a flaw in the strips of memory you had of Childe. Was that what Childe truly wanted, or was it simply that he was sick of you? When he’d said “you’d have to find a way without me” did that mean he wanted to find a way without you? Perhaps you’d been too forward, too demanding. Perhaps he’d managed to realize your feelings and felt repelled by them. Had it been too much, meeting him almost everyday for some periods of time, eating lunch together and sometimes dinner. What about that time you’d invited him over to your house to play a game? Had that been too much?

You sighed, dragging yourself over the final ridge. Sitting down to take a rest you closed you eyes. You hated that your mind wandered this way, that no matter what you couldn’t help but ask yourself again and again, what had you done. What would Childe think about this sad person laying on the ground, the sad part was you couldn’t answer that question.

The sound of footsteps brought you back to the present, and you let out a suppressed groan at the figures in your line of sight.

“Don’t you guys ever get posted anywhere else?” You rolled your eyes, reaching behind your back to summon your polearm.

“You’re trespassing.” The voice that came out of the Electro Vanguard was so deep and distorted as to be hilarious.

“Lastly I checked you were neither a citizen of Liyue, nor Rex Lapis, so if anyone’s “trespassing” on public territory it’s you.” You sighed. “Oh well. Unfortunately you caught me on a day where I’m somewhat prepared.” With that you lunged towards the Hydro Legionnaire and the fight began.

Fighting when one is already frustrated is both a blessing and a curse. The fight itself was almost invigorating, the first Fatui hit the ground and with it you felt part of your worries fade away, if only for the small window of time which this fight offered. Was this why Childe fought so much? The though crossed your mind as you whirled behind the Pyro Bracer and pressed as much Electro as you dared into the back of his head, tripping him with the staff of your polearm on his way down.

Soon enough there was only you and the Electro Vanguard left. Unfortunately you were beginning to feel the other side affect of anger, that being misfocus. Being more versed in using your polearm as a sort of lightning rod your found the Vanguard much harder to deal with, more than once barely diving out of the way of the hammer he was swinging around, surprisingly light on his feet considering what the weight must be. Your anger was quickly draining, turning into something more akin to panic, and as you found yourself stumbling more and more you realized that today was really, really not your day.

The Vanguard was becoming aware of how fast you were tiring, a gravelly sort of laugh emerging from behind his mask. As you found your with you back to the slope you wondered if it was just worth it to make an escape. The Fatui swung his hammer once more, barreling towards you. Having nothing left to do you put your polearm out in front of you, hoping that your arms were strong enough not to recoil against the inevitable blow. Closing your eyes you thought of nothing, drowning in a sea of panic. If there was any coherent part of your brain it wished that you weren’t here, that you just stayed home, or swallowed you pride and gone to the gate. But it was too late now, and you were about to get hit.

However the blow never landed, instead a loud sound pierced the air. Whipping your arms open you saw the Electro Vanguard stumble, his hammer having been dropped on the ground. He was grasping towards his ankle, in which was stuck an arrow, glowing a faint aquamarine. Swearing the Fatui member glanced around, before stumbling away, dragging his weapon and his left leg behind him like dead weight.

“Some things never change, huh?”

“Childe!” You whirled towards your once again savior, face burning from embarrassment. “I took out the rest of them this time.”

“I can see that,” said Childe, surveying the area, a telltale smirk on his face, “very impressive. Although, if I may suggest, next time try to take out the Electro Vanguard first, especially since you don’t wield a weapon made for pure damage.”

“Is this turning into a teaching moment?”

“Absolutely not.” Childe laughed.

You found the sound catching, and soon a smile spread across your face as you let your polearm disappear once more. You ran up to Childe, and were about to throw you arms around his neck in a characteristic hug, when the thoughts of before came ramming back into your brain. Taking a step back you planted your arms firmly in front of you, hoping that maybe Childe hadn’t noticed what you’d been about to do.

However Childe approached you instead.

“You weren’t at the gate today.” He said coyly, lips drifting somewhere between a smirk and a frown.

“I’m sorry.” You lowered your head. “I just thought, well maybe that would be better. Since you said you might be leaving permanently and all, and since you were right when you said I’d have to figure things out without you, I don’t know, I thought maybe it’d be for the best.”

Looking up the expression on Childe’s face could only be described as one of complete disbelief. For a moment he stayed frozen in place.

“What in Teyvat do you mean I’m leaving permanently?”

“You said that! Remember… when we were going to pick sea shells you said that you were leaving.” You stepped back, cheeks flushed. “Or maybe you were just sort of sick of me or something.”

“Why would you ever think that?” Childe walked up to you, enveloping one of the hands at your side in his own and bringing it up towards him.

“I… I don’t know,” you replied, feeling very confused and very foolish, “I thought maybe that I was being too affectionate, or too clingy. I mean I know you don’t like me or anything like that. And I thought maybe that I was crossing the boundaries of our friendship.”

“I don’t like you? I’ve liked you since almost the first day we’ve met!”

“Not like that! I mean, like like, you know? As in… well, as in I… I love you.” You let your voice peter out.

“I love you too!” Childe let out. Shaking his head he smiled widely. “That’s what I’m trying to say. I’ve liked you since almost the first time we’ve met. I wasn’t trying to shoo you away.”

“What?” Your brain was short circuiting. Something had gone terribly wrong. You’d definitely been knocked out at some point, and was now hallucinating. There was no way Childe liked you, loved you. He could love anyone, why would he love you.

Childe stepped closer, moving so that your foreheads were almost pressed together.

“May I?” He whispered, voice almost shy. You nodded, a just as small “yes” escaping your lips before Childe cut off your ability to say anything more. It was a short kiss, sweet and chaste, and yet you felt everything around you suddenly come into sharp, almost lucid clarity. You weren’t dreaming. This was happening. This was Childe and he liked you. Childe like you. He liked you, he really liked you.

“Why?” You let out, when the two of you separated. Thankfully Childe remained close to you, being without his presence now would’ve been quite lonely.

“Why what?”

“Why me? I’m not, I don’t know, I can’t even knock out an Electro Vanguard without help.”

Childe let out a laugh, lovely as music.

“I don’t know,” he replied, eyes sparkling, “because you’re you. And I like you.”

And all of a sudden you found that that was enough.

Ganyu

The days that you accompanied Ganyu on her various errands were the ones in which you were most aware that you were on a level utterly below her.

Of course humans could never really measure up to adepti, after all they made the world and humans simply lived in it. Still in terms of humans, well you weren’t exactly pushing exceptional. If Ganyu represented all that was exceptional about the adepti, well then you represented the average human who didn’t like their job and overall went about their day as unnoticeable as an ant on the road.

Of course Ganyu never acted in a way that would betray the imbalance between the two of you. Indeed Ganyu was nothing if not kind, sweet, and utterly without a semblance of hierarchy. It was one of the things that you adored about her, the straightforward honesty she carried with her, and the way that she appeared not to judge living beings on a scale, even if that was the right of those who were higher and didn’t have to worry about said scale.

“Can you carry this for me?” Ganyu’s voice was soft and somewhat hesitant. You smiled widely, knowing that Ganyu simply had difficulty asking other people for help.

“Of course I can!” Scooping up the package that was stretched out towards you, you saw Ganyu let out a short sigh of relief.

“Thank you.”

“Of course! I’m always happy to help you. Where are we taking this?”

“Over to the funeral parlor. It seems that there are some tiles in here that are being used for a specific ritual. Hu Tao said that the family wanted it, I hope she doesn’t actually mean she pushed them towards it.” Ganyu let out a soft sigh. “She once suggested advertising for cremation. Somehow I feel that won’t exactly be welcomed by the people.”

“No one likes to be reminded of their own mortality. Ah, but Hu Tao is doing her best, and if these tiles end up being insulators, I suppose we can’t do much about it. I’ll make sure not to drop them anyways. Getting on Hu Tao’s bad side feels like asking for a prank.”

“You’re probably right.” Ganyu chuckled.

You blushed slightly, loving the way her laugh sounded, soft and open. You knew Ganyu struggled sometimes; she admitted to you herself that it was very difficult to live an existence defined by liminality. Was she an adeptus? Was she a human? She was neither, and yet both would claim her and call her other. In understanding this Ganyu had retreated into herself. Perhaps that’s why her laugh meant so much.

As you strolled down the docks an angry voice cut through the air.

“Qixing!”

Both of you turning around you saw Bolai, heaving slightly, teetering his way towards you. His face was stormy, and for a moment you wondered if someone had stolen something. His words when he caught up however revealed a very different motivation.

“I demand justice!”

“What for?” Ganyu asked, voice deadly serious once more.

“What for? For what Huixin said in regards to me! For the Liyue Qixing complying with disgusting rumors as to the ways in which I conduct my business and my finances. As to the way that you promised to help me then turned on me!”

“I see…” Ganyu sighed as you wracked your brain, trying to remember what she’d told you about the time that she and the traveler ran around trying to detangle various examples of tax fraud. “Have you considered putting up a formal complaint?” Ganyu meanwhile was still trying to keep professional, something that you admired her for.

“How am I supposed to trust the Qixing after what happened? No! I demand compensation now!”

“Sir, I’m sure you’re quite upset, but there’s no need to act in such a way. If you wish to clear your name, then we can meet in private and review the testimony and documents we received. If not, then I’m afraid there is nothing I can do for you. I’m very sorry.”

Ganyu turned back towards the direction in which you two had been previously walking. Evidently too agitated to think properly Bolai let out a strangled cry.

“We’re not finished yet!” Reaching out, he seemed to be attempting to turn Ganyu around by the shoulder. Having been standing there unthinking you now moved to block the action, knowing that Bolai didn’t really mean anything by it, but not trusting the man who looked like he was about to burst a blood vessel. Bolai’s hand instead smacked into the box in your hands, which slipped from your grip and fell to the floor in a great crash.

Time seemed to slow down somewhat after this, as Bolai stepped backwards and Ganyu turned around, face one of evident horror at the scene. You felt your face begin to burn as you looked at the unassuming box, which now looked a little bit the worse for wear.

“What…” Ganyu trailed off. Bolai waved his hands about in a panicked sort of way.

“That wasn’t me! That wasn’t my fault! It was this person they… I don’t know what they were thinking, getting in the way like that. How idiotic! This is nothing but a mess, a disgrace!”

Normally you wouldn’t pay Bolai’s words any mind, but now they seemed to pierce right through, as you realized all the trouble you’d just caused Ganyu. Glancing over towards her you found you could neither look her in the eyes nor stay where you were.

“I-I’m sorry!” You stammered. Moving to pick up the box you found your hand hesitating. Fearing that you’d just make things worse you pulled yourself and dashed in the opposite direction, speeding up the docks and towards the outskirts of the city.

Normally the view from Mount Tianheng was one that stole your breath away. Today however the mountain seemed completely uninteresting, especially when compared to the thoughts racing in your head.

How had you gotten here, how had you messed up so much? Ganyu didn’t need your posturing, your attempt to help. She was an adeptus for Morax’s sake! And who were you? Someone who couldn’t even carry a box from Point A to Point B. And now you’d just caused more trouble for Ganyu, when she already had so much to do.

“I’m such a failure.” You groaned into your palms.

“You aren’t!” You lifted your head at the soft exclamation, already knowing who the voice belonged to. Ganyu sidled up to the ledge of the mountain silently, fidgeting with her hands. “May I sit next to you?”

“Of course.” You replied, grateful that Ganyu was even talking to you. Smiling softly the Qixing Emissary let out a soft sigh.

“I love the view of the city from here.” She spoke softly, eyes on the horizon.

“I do too.”

“There’s something so lovely about watching everyone go about their day, isn’t there? To see the people work in harmony to bring prosperity and peace to the city of Liyue. To see how everyone continues on the legacy of Rex Lapis.”

“That’s a lot to see.” You joked, still feeling a little uncomfortable, as if Ganyu might in a minute get up and leave.

“But can’t you see it?” Ganyu’s voice was earnest and her eyes shined. “It’s wonderful how people do it, how they continue to make this city thrive, to keep the contracts of Morax alive and within living memory.”

“Perhaps it’s just harder for humans to judge it themselves?”

“Perhaps.” Ganyu’s expression shifted into something, almost shy, not quite melancholic. “Just like how you’re finding it difficult to forgive yourself.”

“I’m so sorry Ganyu. I don’t know what I was thinking! I just… I just, wasn’t thinking.”

“You were trying to be kind.” Ganyu replied, something almost akin to blush coating her cheeks. “And I have to thank you for that.”

“But I just caused more trouble…”

“You were trying to be kind,” Ganyu repeated, “like I said, you’re finding it difficult to forgive yourself. But you have to. You didn’t truly do anything that needs forgiveness.”

“But I was doing it for completely selfish reasons!” You blurted out, embarrassment and doubt turning into the words you never wanted to utter. “It’s because I like you, and not just because I was trying to be nice. But because, because maybe I wanted to do something for you, and then maybe I’d be good enough maybe.” Realizing how odd that just sounded you turned your head away. For a moment your words hung in the air, and the longer the silence continued the longer you thought about how utterly selfish you were.

“Thank you.” There was a smile in Ganyu’s voice, and as you turned your head once more you could see it plastered across her face.

“For what?”

“For telling me you like me.”

“But… but isn’t it just burdening you? After all I’m not good enough for you.”

“You are!” Ganyu’s voice was firm. “You’re absolutely good enough for me. And what you did, you call it selfishness, but I don’t understand that. Being kind to people you like isn’t selfish, even if you like them. Because this time you were genuinely helping me. Besides, if that’s selfish then I’ve also been terribly selfish.”

“How?”

“By asking you to accompany me everywhere. Because maybe, maybe I like you too.”

For a moment you wondered if you hadn’t accidentally slipped off the cliff, so weightless did you feel. A bit lightheaded you leaned forward.

“Really?”

“Yes.” Ganyu smiled nervously. Reaching out she took your hand in hers.

The two of you watched the sun set over the city of contracts mostly in silence. Every once in a while there would be a spurt of conversation, but mostly there was nothing but the sounds of the birds and the cicadas, and the pounding of two hearts, hearts both a bit ragged from the events of the day.

For what a day it had been. And how wonderfully it had ended.

Kaeya

If you could use anything as justification for your crush on Kaeya, he did flirt with you. Unfortunately he also flirted with everyone else in Mondstadt.

“How’s my favorite knight of Favonius?” Kaeya’s cocky voice was clear as a bell, and for a moment your heart flipped as the handsome knight came into view, smile as lovely as it had been the day before.

“Blessed by the presence of our beloved cavalry captain.” You replied in a singsong voice.

The first time Kaeya had used that line on you it felt like your soul had left your body and your heart had run a marathon. Unfortunately you’d heard him use practically the same line on Rosaria the next day, his favorite mysterious nun, robbing you of your fantasy in which Kaeya had any interest for you.

Your banter however was not without genuine feeling. You were utterly infatuated with Kaeya, having fallen for the handsome knight about two weeks into your own training. Originally having been an adventurer you’d joined the knights relatively recently after a series of Abyss attacks on the City of Freedom. As such Kaeya had by then already occupied an exalted position among the ranks, and the hours of being trained, teased, and flirted at by the mysterious cavalry captain had been enough to throw you head over heels.

Not that you’d ever expect things to develop more than they already had. Having a crush on the flirtiest man in Mondstadt did mean that you were praised every once in a while, but it also meant that the praise meant little more than empty words, and that there was always someone else who had heard them. Not that you begrudged those people, not knowing them or not caring. It was Kaeya’s right to be as he was, flirty and irreverent; and you’d never ask him to change that part of himself, or any other.

To do so would be to change the person you’d grown to love.

You trotted up the steps of the Favonius headquarters, opening the door with a slight “oof” before stepping into the cool building. Today was going to be a quiet sort of day for the knights, and you’d been assigned to pick up a few books from Jean’s office to be recorded by Lisa before being sent off to the Church. Going to open the door you paused at the voices inside.

“– saying it’s nothing.”

“And I’m saying that it’s becoming a distraction. I don’t want to control your actions Kaeya, but this pining has been slowing down your work, and we need you as one of our most crucial members to be on top of things.”

“I’m not pining.”

“What do you mean you aren’t pining,” Jean let out a snort, “as if it’s not obvious to everyone around you. Look, I’m not saying you have to break things off –”

“Good, because they haven’t even begun.”

“Then maybe that’s part of your problem. Maybe if you told them you liked them then you’d be able to get back on track.”

“I’m doing my best.”

“You aren’t doing anything. And that’s the problem.”

You didn’t hear the rest of the conversation, having made your way over to the library as to make sure that you were get caught, and to cool your head in regards to what you’d just heard.

So Kaeya liked someone. You shouldn’t’ve really been surprised. Kaeya was a wonderful person; intelligent, good with a weapon, polite, handsome. What person wouldn’t fall in love with him? And when everyone’s in love with you, well, it was unsurprising that eventually Kaeya would find someone who he loved back just as much. Then, why did it hurt?

You fought the urge to wrack your brain for the people Kaeya spoke most about, finding the act beneath you. Still, your mind wandered. Perhaps it was Rosaria after all, or maybe it was only because you remembered her. Perhaps it was the sword smith who came twice monthly to check up on the weaponry. Or perhaps it was the tailor, who could sew anything with the utmost care. Or perhaps it was a musician, or an archivist, or another knight. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps.

Your head swam and you found your eyes stinging. Now wasn’t the time to cry, not when you needed to honor your appointment with Jean, not when you were somewhere where any one of your colleagues might discover you. Not where Kaeya might walk in any minute and realize what you’d done. This thought finally brought you out of the spiral of your mind. Making sure that any tears that might’ve escaped were wiped away you took a deep breath, steadying yourself before you walked out of the library and into Jean’s office.

Evidently you must’ve looked much worse than you thought, for Jean took one look at you and ordered you home, grumbling about how much trouble there had been recently. You thanked her half-heartedly before making your way out of the Headquarters, heart heavy as lead. At least work would’ve been a welcome distraction.

Arriving home you saw what Jean meant. Though you weren’t particularly teary, your face had taken on an ashen pallor that made it look like you’d either just gotten a shock, fainted, or had suddenly contracted consumption. Letting out a sigh you collapsed on the couch of your apartment. You knew you should probably do something, should eat or work on some extra work or something. But right now you didn’t want to do any of that. You just wanted to forget.

The knock that sounded at your door was extremely unwelcome, and you bit back bitter words as you made your way over to the door. Any protest however was silenced at the sight of Kaeya, hair slightly tussled, expression opaque, on your doorstep.

“Kaeya.” You meant to sound more peppy, but the action felt too tiring. “What’re you doing here?”

“Making sure that you’re alright. Jean told me that you looked unwell, and we can’t have our best knight getting sick, now can we?”

“I’m fine. Just a little tired.”

You went to turn around, when Kaeya reached over and place his hand on your forehead. Freezing you let out a sound somewhere between a strangled cry and a shriek. Kaeya didn’t react to this however, or the red quickly spreading across the bridge of your nose. Instead he let out a sigh, before smiling, something which also caused your heart to seize up.

“Not running a fever. I’m glad. Do you know what’s wrong by any chance?”

“Yes. No! I mean, I think, I, I just need rest.”

“You can tell me if something’s wrong. I might not be able to help, but I can try. Consider it the duty of the Cavalry Captain. Have to keep up appearances, even among the ranks.”

“Really Kaeya, I’m fine.”

“You don’t seem fine.” Kaeya’s eye seemed to pierce through your soul. “You seem… upset, exhausted. Please, let me help.”

“I can’t…” Your voice cracked and you turned your head away, mortified by your inability to control yourself.

“What do you mean you can’t?” Kaeya’s voice was filled with sudden worry. “Is someone doing something to you?”

“No! No one is. I just can’t because, because it’d be selfish.”

“What do you mean?” Kaeya’s tone had become utterly perplexed, and for a moment you felt the crazy urge to laugh. As if it wasn’t painfully obvious why you couldn’t. This was so tiring. You were so tired.

“Because it’s not fair of me to take away your happiness just because of my own feelings.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I heard you talking to Jean,” you explain, face burning, “she said that you liked someone. Or maybe you did, I don’t remember. Anyways you like someone and it’s not fair of that to hurt me, I have no right to your feelings. But, but it hurts, it really, really hurts.”

The silence when you finished was miserable. You weren’t even looking up at Kaeya, not wanting to see the destruction of a friendship you valued so much.

“Have you considered that the person I’m so infatuated with might be you?”

When you looked up you caught a wave of emotions, similar in strength to the ones currently going through you, plastered over Kaeya’s face. Happiness, sadness, regret, relief; all these things danced in his eyes. In that moment you loved him even more for it, for knowing that he understood, and that he too couldn’t hide the affects of having someone you loved so close and yet so far.

Saying nothing you walked over and slowly stretched your hand out. Kaeya took the hand in his, and you reveled in the small intimacy, in his calloused fingers enveloping yours.

“I’m not good enough.” You pointed out, voice soft.

“You aren’t the one who decides who I love.” Kaeya replied, voice firm. “To me there is no one else worthy in the world. Only you. And I hope that I can be the same for you, that I can be worthy.”

“Yes. Oh yes.”

For Kaeya was more than simply worthy. He was the one you loved the most, as well as the one who’d now made you the happiest person you could ever dream of.

#requested #genshin impact #genshin impact fanfiction #childe #ganyu #kaeya #childe x reader #ganyu x reader #kaeya x reader #scenarios #my writing

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timelesslords · 3 years

Note

prompts: could you write an in canon verse (so like gods and stuff are real) fic with amnesia? it could be post TLO or it could be one of them coming out of anesthesia and feeling wonky. i just love a good memory loss fic.

@halfbloodcarrie was instrumental in making this happen!!! Her adorable fluffy idea was completely paid dust in favor of making this angsty as hell but I blame her for me getting it done at all <3

read on AO3

Everything was dark. And everything hurt. His head especially was throbbing, but he couldn’t make out any other feeling. He could hear something; vague at first, just a ringing. But if he struggled, and he did, he could start to make out faint voices. His eyes refused to open, they wouldn’t even blink, but the noises were getting clearer by the second.

“What if he doesn’t wake up?” a worried voice asked. Something about it felt familiar, but he couldn’t even pry his eyes open, much less figure out who it belonged to.

“He’ll wake up,” a second voice said, male this time. He sounded confident, assured. At least he thought so.

“There was so much blood, I thought… gods.”

The first voice again, though this time it wavered. It sounded scared, terrified even.

“He’ll be alright, Annabeth. He’s got a thick skull.”

That made the first voice laugh, watery as it was.

“Don’t I know it.”

Some feeling was starting to return to his limbs, slowly but surely. He tried blinking again, but it felt sluggish, slow. Suddenly he realized he could feel his arms and fingers, and there was a hand in his, gripping it so tightly it was a wonder he hadn’t felt it before.

“Percy?” the female voice asked, hopeful. He groaned. His head was pounding like nothing he’d ever felt before. Actually, he wasn’t sure if that was true, because he couldn’t remember his head pounding before, ever.

Come to think of it, he couldn’t remember anything at all.

He blinked again, this time managing to pry his eyelids open a fraction of a degree. The light streaming in hurt like a bitch, and he groaned again, closing his eyes.

“Percy,” the first voice said again, more frantically, “Can you hear me?”

She seemed to be talking to him, though he wasn’t quite sure. He couldn’t remember his name, but she’d said Percy twice, so that had to be it, didn’t it?

He tried to say something to the girl, but it came out as a strangled groan of pain.

“Will,” she said, a little desperately.

“He’s maxed out, Annabeth, I’m sorry,” the other voice said.

The girl (Annabeth?) muttered something under her breath in-- was that Greek? And how did he know that? More determined than ever, Percy blinked again, this time managing to crack his eyelids open and keep them that way.

His vision was blurry, but a few more blinks and the vague shapes in front of him started to sharpen into focus.

“Percy?” the girl said again. Percy squinted, trying to focus on her.

The first thing he noticed was that she was-- well, pretty didn’t quite describe it. She was seriously beautiful. Her eyes were a dark grey color, currently wide with concern, her hair framing her face in cascades of golden curls. Her nose was small and button shaped, dotted with freckles.

Even if Percy didn’t currently feel like a small blacksmith’s forge was hammering on the inside of his skull, he was pretty sure he would’ve been rendered pretty speechless.

“Hey there, sleepyhead. You were out for a while,” she said, smiling. She did look relieved, but Percy didn’t miss the genuine worry behind her eyes either, the little waver along her lips trying to maintain an upbeat expression.

“I… what’s going on?” Percy asked. Annabeth bit her lip, looking over her shoulder. Percy glanced upwards, properly seeing the other person in the room for the first time. He was a teenager, with shaggy blonde hair a shade or two lighter than the girl’s. He was wearing a white lab coat over what looked to be an orange t-shirt and jeans, which didn’t exactly instill Percy with a lot of confidence in whatever medical care he was receiving.

Of course, the fact that he had no memory didn’t help matters.

“You sort of got hit in the head,” Annabeth said, wincing as she did.

“Really hard,” the boy added.

Percy reached up tentatively, to the place where it felt like his skull was splitting inside out. Instead of skin he felt something else, some thick sort of fabric.

“Ow,” he said, a little unhelpfully. The girl smiled again-- crap, how was she even more beautiful when she smiled?-- but it still had an edge of sadness to it.

“Yeah. Discus accident,” she said.

“Discus accident?” Percy asked, confused.

“Yeah. Those stone frisbee things, remember?” the other guy said.

“No,” Percy said, pushing himself into a sitting position. It made his head throb, but he couldn’t stand lying down anymore. “I don’t-- I don’t remember anything.”

“You mean-- you mean you don’t remember the accident,” Annabeth said, a little forcefully. Her grey eyes flashed, and Percy didn’t quite recognize the expression, but something in his gut told him it was not good.

“No, I mean I don’t remember anything,” Percy repeated, figuring it was best to get it out of the way sooner or later, “I don’t know where I am or who you are or who I am.”

The girl took one very long look at him. He didn’t know what exactly he had said in particular that had triggered something in her, but the concern fell from her face in an instant. She dropped his hand, something sharp overtaking her expression.

“You’re such an ass sometimes,” she said. Her voice was a little thick, but Percy couldn’t tell if she was crying, because in the next second she stood and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her. Inadvertently, Percy felt a twinge of something sad in his chest, though he couldn’t quite place why. He didn’t know Annabeth, but she clearly seemed to know him, and what he’d said had clearly set her off.

All of this was really not improving his headache, which had resumed its throbbing with reckless abandon.

“I didn’t mean to…” Percy trailed off. To what? Upset her? Make her run away? But all he’d done was tell the honest truth-- he couldn’t remember shit. The guy was giving him a look that was bordering on disgust.

“Dude, that’s really not funny,” he said. He sounded pissed, though if Percy wasn’t entirely mistaken, there was a hint of fear behind his bright blue eyes.

“I’m not trying to be funny, I literally don’t know what’s going on,” Percy said, starting to feel a little frantic. Why was everyone here acting like they knew him? And why did he not even know him? He felt nerves and something else tugging in his gut, an insistent, terrifying pull--

Without warning, the glass next to his bed shattered, spraying water and glass everywhere. Percy flinched away from the table, whirling around to look at the boy. His eyes were wide and surprised.

“What the fuck was that?” Percy asked, alarmed.

“That was… you,” the boy said, staring at Percy like he had just grown a second head, “Styx, you’re not making this up, are you?”

“How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t know what’s going on for you to believe me?” Percy said, still staring wide-eyed at the place where the cup had shattered. For his own sanity, he decided to ignore the boy’s declaration that he had caused it.

“Four, apparently,” the boy said, rubbing his forehead like he could feel a headache coming on, “Unless you want to make it five for good measure?”

“I have absolutely no memory,” Percy repeated.

“Great. This is just-- this is awesome,” the boy said, sighing heavily.

“Yeah, I’m having so much fun over here,” Percy said dryly.

“Right, sorry,” the boy said, wincing, “Your name is Percy.”

So Percy had guessed that correctly. Good to know.

“My name is Will,” the boy continued, oblivious to Percy’s thoughts, “The girl was--”

“Annabeth,” Percy finished. Will perked up, hopeful, but Percy shook his head.

“I heard you say her name,” Percy explained. Will deflated.

“Oh, right,” he said. He sounded inordinately disappointed, way more disappointed than he’d been when Percy hadn’t remembered him.

“How exactly did this happen?” Percy asked, doing his best not to rub his forehead again. Will sighed.

“Some newbies were messing around with the discuses on the strawberry fields-- which is stupidly dangerous, by the way, we have an arena for a reason-- but it went a little off course and almost hit Annabeth in the face. You shoved her out of the way but it clipped your forehead pretty good.”

Percy tried to process all that, piece by piece. He didn’t know what a newbie was, and apparently wherever this place was had strawberry fields that he and Annabeth had been in together? But the strangest thing of all was that Percy didn’t feel at all surprised that he’d gotten injured trying to get Annabeth out of the way. That piece felt strangely right to him, even if everything else was messy and confusing.

“So me and Annabeth are friends, then?” he asked. Will gave him a strange look, his face paling slightly.

“You guys… you’re close. Really close.”

Percy nodded. That made sense. He didn’t know why Will was being weird about it, but he believed him regardless.

“She was mad at me,” Percy noted. At this, Will winced.

“Yeah. Memory loss… it's kind of a sore subject for her.”

“Why?” Percy asked. Maybe it was a little invasive, but this was all stuff he was supposed to know anyway, wasn’t it?

Will sighed, rubbing his face in his hands.

“Gods, I’m so not the person to be explaining this to you,” he said, “But a few years ago you sort of… disappeared. And you lost all your memories. Except you remembered her. But it was really, really tough on her, she had no idea if you were gonna know anything or not when she found you.”

Percy blinked, trying to take all that in. He had a feeling that was the hyper-condensed version of what had gone down, but it explained the situation well enough. Annabeth hadn’t considered the fact that he genuinely wouldn’t remember her, so she’d assumed it was a bad joke. Percy wished it was a bad joke, because he would give absolutely anything to remember more about her.

“Got it,” Percy said, trying not to frown, “So how did I get my memories back last time? Can we do that again?”

Will grimaced.

“I think last time you drank gorgon’s blood, but we’re fresh out of that.”

Percy stared at him, unsure if he was joking or not. He looked serious, but Percy didn’t want to press it. Clearly last time had been a different sort of deal.

“So what do we do? I can’t go around like this forever.”

“Well, hopefully it's just temporary. Your head injury, plus the mortal pain meds we gave you, plus the nectar--”

“The what?” Percy asked.

“Don’t worry about it,” Will said, a little hurriedly. “The point is, your brain is processing a lot of stuff right now. My best guess is that it overloaded a bit, and the amnesia is a side effect. If that’s the case it should go away on its own eventually.”

“And if it’s not the case?” Percy asked, dreading the answer a little. As predicted, WIll grimaced again.

“It could be from the initial injury. In which case it would be… more permanent.”

Percy’s mouth went a little dry.

“Goodie.”

“It probably isn’t,” Will said, though he didn’t sound entirely convinced.

“So what do we do?” Percy asked again.

“You could try going to sleep. It might give your brain a chance to readjust, chill out a little. Or…”

Will trailed off, clearly unwilling to finish his thought.

“Or?” Percy prompted.

“Or we could try to jog your memory with stuff you might remember,” Will finished. Percy didn’t understand why this option seemed to be so unpleasant to Will, since it made the most sense to him. He felt disoriented as hell, and he was pretty sure he wasn’t going to be able to calm his mind down enough to sleep anytime soon. Plus, he was pretty sure he’d been unconscious for a good long while.

“How long was I asleep just now?” Percy asked.

“A while,” Will admitted.

“So let’s try the other thing.”

Will swallowed heavily, his fingers gripping the sides of his white coat a little too tightly.

“Yeah. Okay,” he said, still not sounding happy about it at all, “I’ll-- ugh. Don’t move, I’ll be right back.”

Percy did not move, mostly because he didn’t think he could get up from his bed if he tried. Being alone gave him the chance to observe the room he was in a little bit. It was small but clean, sort of a cross between a normal bedroom and a hospital unit. The walls were made of old looking hardwood, and if he craned his head back a little bit he could almost see out the window. It looked green out there, but it was kind of hard to tell.

Nothing about this place felt familiar, but that didn’t mean much, given nothing Percy had experienced since waking up felt familiar.

Nothing except for those few flashes of feeling he’d gotten about Annabeth, anyway.

Will was gone for a long time, a lot longer than Percy had been expecting. He couldn’t tell time very well and he didn’t see a clock anywhere, but it felt like Will had to have been gone at least half an hour, maybe more. Just when Percy was about to give up and try taking a nap, the door opened again. Will was there, but this time Annabeth was in tow too.

Percy tried not to read too hard into the fact that she didn’t look happy to be there. If he wasn’t mistaken, her eyes were puffy and red from crying, though now they were narrowed in barely constrained anger, her arms folded over her chest.

Will, for his part, looked extremely nervous. That didn’t give Percy a lot of hope about how this was going to go.

“It would probably work better if you could get up and walk around, but well…” he trailed off, but Percy knew exactly why that wasn’t possible. Just keeping his eyes open had been a struggle, and he was pretty sure if he tried to stand right now he was gonna black out.

“Yeah, sounds like a bad idea,” he agreed. Annabeth said nothing, just kept staring with her jaw clenched tight.

“I figured-- you know, you remembered Annabeth last time,” Will said, still sounding nervous, “And you guys have known each other for years, so if anything is going to jog your memory… well.”

“Okay,” Percy said, easily.

Annabeth remained silent.

“I’ll leave you guys alone,” Will said, looking like he absolutely couldn’t wait to get out of the room. He did a second later, slipping out the door and shutting it behind him.

Annabeth looked extraordinarily unhappy to be there. Any care that she had displayed for him when he first woke up was apparently gone. She said nothing as she looked at him with nothing but ice in her eyes.

He didn’t know why exactly she was so pissed-- it wasn’t his fault he couldn’t remember anything, and wouldn’t it be worse for him anyway? But she didn’t seem keen on speaking to him anytime soon, and Percy figured it was up to him to break the ice.

“So, um. Are you single?” Percy asked. It was dumb, sure, but he didn’t remember shit, and this girl was pretty and she seemed to care about him and well? Might as well shoot his shot.

Annabeth muttered something under her breath, something that sounded suspiciously like I’m going to kill you. Cool. Definitely did not make her hotter to him, not even a little bit.

“I’m not single,” she said, practically glaring at him.

“Got it. Sorry,” Percy said. For just a second her eyes ducked away, sadness replacing anger. But then she looked back up, and her previous expression was reinstated.

“Why don’t we just stick to you,” she said.

“Sure,” Percy said. He didn't want to make her mad again, because he had a feeling if that kept happening it would not end well for him. He wasn’t sure what could be worse than complete and total amnesia, but looking at Annabeth he was pretty sure she could think of something.

She took a deep breath, a little unsteadily.

“Your name is Percy,” she said, “I guess Will already told you that, though.”

Percy nodded. She moistened her lips, staring down at the ground.

“Okay. What else do you want to know?”

“Where are we?” Percy asked. It wasn’t his most urgent question, but it felt like a safer one to ask. Then again, from the look on Annabeth’s face, maybe that was a miscalculation. She was biting her lip, the anger in her expression softening slightly. It seemed to be replaced by something sad though, and Percy found he almost preferred the anger.

“It’s… a little hard to explain. But we’re at a camp. A summer camp. It’s-- it’s where we met.”

“Why are we here now?” Percy asked. Annabeth shrugged.

“We’re just visiting,” she said.

“Together?” Percy asked. She stared at him, swallowing heavily.

“Yeah. Together,” she said, though she was clearly unwilling to elaborate.

Okay then. Time for a new line of questioning. A safer line, one that hopefully wouldn’t put her on the verge of tears.

“What’s my favorite color?” he asked.

“Blue,” she said, instantly.

“Favorite food?”

“Anything blue,” she said, just as fast.

“I eat blue food?” Percy asked, confused. She smiled for the first time since he’d told her his memory was gone. It was small, but it still made his heart flutter.

“Yeah. It’s sort of an inside joke with you and your mom,” she said. The smile faded just as fast as it had come, but her answer had inadvertently given Percy more information than he’d expected.

“So I’m close to my mom?” Percy asked, unable to help it. Annabeth nodded again. She took a tentative step forward, sitting back down on the chair beside his bed.

“Who else?” he asked, without thinking. Annabeth frowned, a little confused.

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“I mean--” Percy started, realizing this might be a little too much too soon, but wanting to know so badly he couldn’t help but ask anyway, “I mean, who else am I close to?”

Annabeth didn’t answer for a long minute. She was looking down at the ground again, her hands gripping her own shoulders, arms shielding her chest. She seemed to be contemplating something, though what it was, Percy wasn’t sure.

Maybe he shouldn’t have asked that question. Maybe it was too personal-- with a start Percy realized that Annabeth was probably a pretty high priority for him, given the scant details he knew about their relationship, and him not knowing that intrinsically had to hurt.

“I’m sorry,” he said, “Just forget it, tell me something else.”

She finally looked back up at him, though she still seemed upset and unsure.

“No, it’s fine,” she said, though she was clearly forcing her voice not to waver, “Like I said, you’re close to your mom, her name is Sally. You have a sister named Estelle and a brother named Tyson. And your best friend is--” she stumbled, but found herself again, “His name is Grover.”

Percy noticed that Annabeth’s own name was conspicuously absent from that list. Maybe he should keep his mouth shut, all things considered, but his curiosity got the best of him. He wanted to know this more than anything.

“What about you?” he asked, voice quiet.

It took her less time to answer than he expected, but she was still quiet for a minute.

“You asked me if I was single,” she said finally, eyes ducked down, a rosy blush growing in her cheeks, “And I said no because-- because we’re dating. We have been for a while.”

“Oh,” Percy said. He could feel his own face getting red, even though this was kind of great news-- or maybe not so great news, considering his stupid brain still couldn’t remember shit. But it still felt right, like a puzzle piece slotting into place. Of course he was dating her. That was just correct, an inalienable fact he felt dumb for not knowing, despite not knowing anything at all.

“Yeah,” she said, “But you don’t remember, so… so I don’t know anymore, I guess.”

“I’m sorry,” Percy said, and he felt it. He felt like an idiot, both for trying to flirt with her earlier, and for not putting the pieces together sooner. The hand holding probably should have given it away, at the very least.

To his surprise, Annabeth gave him a small smile, even though her eyes were a little red. She wiped them on her sleeve, clearly trying not to do it in an obvious way.

“Sorry, it’s just-- that’s so you,” she said, sniffling a little.

“What’s so me?” Percy asked. He felt stupid, oblivious, but she just smiled again, a touch wider this time.

“Apologizing for something that isn’t even your fault.”

“I really am sorry,” Percy said, and he felt worse with every word, “I want to remember, I do, it’s just-- all of it’s gone.”

“I know,” she said. She sounded defeated. “I guess it would be too much to ask for you to remember me twice, huh?”

She said it like a joke, but Percy could feel the real pain behind her words. He felt an ache in his chest, like a phantom pain he couldn’t quite place, something in him mirroring her own hurt. He wanted so badly to comfort her, but he didn’t know how.

Or maybe he did. His brain was a jumbled mess, but he did know the only things that had made him feel anything since he’d woken up had to do with her.

“I… I almost get flashes,” he admitted, glancing up at her again. She wasn’t quite meeting his eye, looking somewhere over his shoulder, but he continued anyway. “When you say or do things… It’s like my body knows what to feel but my mind doesn’t know why.”

She glanced up, her eyes finally meeting his own. They were still shining with tears, though not as intensely as before.

“Like how?” she asked, simply. Percy swallowed heavily, not exactly sure what to say. It was hard to describe, given he’d barely recognized his own feelings.

“Like… like when you left, before. I was upset but I didn’t know why. I didn’t know you but I knew… I knew that was supposed to hurt, somehow. And when Will told me about how I got hurt in the first place, how I was trying to keep the frisbee thing from hitting you-- that felt right, but I don’t know why.”

She had graduated to crying in earnest now, tears slipping out of the corner of her eyes and falling down her cheeks. Percy felt the inexplicable urge to reach out and brush them away, but he knew he couldn’t. And that hurt too for some reason, a hollow aching in his chest he couldn’t quite place even though the reason for it was standing right in front of him.

“And right now,” Percy continued, even though maybe he shouldn’t, “You’re upset and I just feel this urge to do something, and I can’t because I don’t know how.”

“Percy, please--” she said, still crying, her voice rough with tears. He didn’t know what she was begging for, but he couldn’t help his next words slipping out, like his tongue knew more what to do than his mind.

“I don’t know anything about me, but I know-- I know I love you. I can feel it. I’m not just saying it either, I swear I can feel it.”

“Percy,” she said again, her voice barely above a whisper this time.

“You have to help me, Annabeth. I don’t know what to do,” he said, and this time it was his turn for his voice to get thick, a lump in his throat obscuring his words.

“I--” she started, swallowing heavily, eyes welling with tears again, “I don’t know what to do.”

“Yes you do,” Percy said, and he was sure she did, something in him just knew, “You always do, don’t you?”

That felt right too, even if he couldn’t place why, but it seemed to mean more to her than to him. She stared at him, eyes wide and scared. She was so close now, close enough that he could see every freckle on her nose.

Annabeth looked so panicked that for a second a second, Percy thought she was going to hit him, but then she did the opposite. She leaned over and kissed him.

Her lips were soft and sweet, and she tasted like strawberries and salt. His lips seemed to know exactly what to do, moving against hers like they’d kiss her a thousand times-- and maybe they had. His hand moved, almost of its own accord to her hair, tangling in it, pulling her a fraction of an inch closer--

And then it hit him. The scent of her shampoo, lemony and sharp and familiar.

He gasped, not meaning to, but she pulled back, grey eyes wide.

“Percy?” she asked, hopeful even as she tried to hide it.

“Annabeth,” he said, trying not to panic as things started to float through his mind-- more than things, memories. Her face and her voice and her words, the feeling of her hand in his and her smile against his lips, it all started to flood back like it had never left.

“Are you--” she asked, her hands on his shoulders, gripping tight, too tight, but he didn’t even care.

“Annabeth,” he breathed, saying her name like a revelation, because it was, “You’re Annabeth Chase, you’re my girlfriend and an architect and you’re scared to death of spiders and you still sleep with a teddy bear--”

She cut him off at that last point, throwing her arms around him and hugging him harder than she ever had-- except for maybe that time she’d thought he was dead for two weeks and he’d crashed his own funeral. Percy hugged her back just as hard, because he actually remembered that.

It hadn’t all come back-- things were blurry, most things, actually. But Annabeth at least felt clear in his mind, a shining beacon welcoming the rest of his memories back. He was already starting to get a headache again, but he didn’t care. They would come back. And even if they didn’t-- he had her. That was enough.

She pulled back from her bone crushing embrace, keeping their faces so close their noses were almost touching. She seemed scared that if she pulled away he might too, even though he had no intention of doing so, physically or mentally.

“So you’re back? Really?” she asked, sounding scared to know the answer.

“Sort of,” Percy confirmed, wincing as he did. He really was starting to get a pounding headache. “I remember you. And bits and pieces of other things, but mostly you.”

Annabeth breathed a sigh of relief, closing her eyes for a long moment.

“You scared the shit out of me,” she whispered, her hands trailing up his neck, just barely scraping his hair.

“I know. I’m sorry,” he breathed. And he did know, now better than ever. It couldn’t have been more than a few hours since he’d woken up without his memory, but he knew every minute of it had to have been hell for her.

Annabeth sighed, pulling back further, so he could see her whole face. Her eyes were still red from crying, and her cheeks were still flushed from their kiss. But he could see the barest traces of humor in her expression, a slight tug at the corner of her mouth where a smile was being repressed.

“What?” he asked, but she just shook her head.

“It’s nothing,” she said, but her smile had grown.

“Come on, I just had amnesia. You have to tell me.”

She laughed, a light tinkling sound. It was just on the edge of being hysterical, but she deserved it, after the day she’d been having.

“Fine. I was just thinking-- Hera couldn’t make you forget me but a glorified frisbee could?” Annabeth said.

“Hey, it was heavy!” Percy protested, but he couldn’t help but grin as he did. He would probably stay grinning for the rest of his life, actually.

“You’re such an idiot,” she breathed, pulling him into a hug again, “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” Percy said, hugging her back. And now he knew he did, in a permanent, tangible way.

There was still a lot missing, but he had the most important bits down. His name was Percy Jackson. He was twenty years old, and in college and a demigod, and lots of other things that would surely return with time.

And he loved Annabeth Chase more than anything in the world.

#this is so cheesy and so long <3 #bon apple teeth #percabeth #percy jackson #percabeth fic #pjo #annabeth chase #pjo fic #percabeth fanfic #i already have more prompts in my inbox than i will realistically every finish #so on a technical level i am not taking more #but if you send one and i like it i might write it anyway lmao #no guarantees though!!

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quartzwriting · 4 years

Text

Green and Gold

Pairing: Doctor Strange X Fem!Reader

Description: During a visit to Asgard, Stephen is protective over you since Loki always seems to not be able to take his eyes off you.

Warnings: Non

Word Count: 4.1k

A/N: Originally posted to Quotev / I like this one :3

Masterlist | Fic Reading Recs | Ao3 | Quotev | Coffee

The frantic rainbow lights disappeared and you stumbled to get your balance on the solid ground that you were thrown on. Stephen was there to help steady you, at hand at your waist with the other at the ready to prevent you from falling over. You wondered why you all could not just travel here through a slingring portal. But Thor insisted you take the Bifrost. To 'get the experience' he had said before he called for it. The knowing smirk on Stephen's face in that moment told you that you might regret this.

In little time you found yourself in Asgard.

Stephen would come here occasionally to discuss relations between mystical threats and threats to the realms. You came along this time. You wanted to see Asgard, Thor wanted you to come along, but Stephen was hesitant to let you come. He told you that someone needed to watch over the Sanctum while he was gone, you made Wong do it instead. He said Asgardian magic is hard to understand, you reminded him that you were advanced now in your mystical studies that you could keep up. He said that it would only be a night or two, you said that you did not want him to leave you for a night or two.

You won and had convinced him. So now you were at the entrance of Asgard, having just experienced being magically thrown across the universe with possible whiplash and your lunch threatening to come up.

Thor, holding his beloved hammer in one hand, looked over at you. "What did you think, Lady (Y/N)?"

"I think I'm gonna be sick." You mumbled.

Stephen patted you on the back, "You'll be alright." There was a slightly amused tone in his voice and that gave you a sudden urge to kick him in the shins.

You had ended up in the middle of a room that was golden and shaped like a dome. There were circular patterns on the walls and in the centre golden steps that lead to a little pedestal that held a sword. Someone was holding that sword, and you were introduced to Heimdall who was the protector of the Bifrost. He bowed to you like you were important and you returned with a bow of your head. Just outside the room, you could see the bridge sparkling with the same rainbow colours as the way you had gotten here. Beyond the long bridge was the castle in the distance.

Thor gestured for you to follow him, so you fell into step beside Stephen as you exited the small structure. You were now walking on the Bifrost bridge. The view you saw before you was absolutely breathtaking. The glittering bridge was just the beginning. Underneath it was a roaring river of clear water. The palace was beautiful, the structure standing as tall as the mountains in its background. The buildings of the surrounding city were sparkling everywhere. You have seen so much since becoming a sorcerer, but this was something else.

Stephen saw the smile on your face and the look of awe in your eyes. This made him smile, and he was suddenly glad he brought you here. He always loved showing you new things, fueling your curiosity and experiencing new things with you. But there was a little worry in the back of his mind that would not go away.

There was one reason, above all others, that Stephen did not want to bring you along.

Loki would be here.

He hated the way he looked at you. He hated his very being because of it. And the knowledge that you and him would be in the same place made his blood boil. Ever since that time Loki showed his face in New York and he had to take him to prevent him from doing anything, and he looked at you up and down like that, he disliked the god so much. And he was so nice to you, and you were nice to him. Whenever Stephen went to Asgard and ran into Loki, he would ask about you. Stephen did not like it.

But your reaction to the city and planet, and you had just gotten here, made the worry go away a little. He would be by your side anyways, to keep Loki away if he was going to try anything. He would throw the cloak around your shoulders to have it hide you away if he needed to. But at the moment he focused on being with you for your first impressions of Asgaurd and not worry too much.

~~~

You were awoken by a light touch and someone softly shaking you awake. The sleepiness was not shaken however, you groaning in protest as you cuddled up even more into the covers of the soft, silken sheets and thick comforter.

There was a chuckle and you new who it was from the deep tone. You lazily opened your eyes and saw Stephen looking down at you, already dressed and seeming wide awake. The sun was shining through the large window with the beautiful view of Asgard. It looked like the world was awake, but you were not ready to drag yourself out of bed.

"I have the first meeting this morning. Thought maybe you would want to come along but looks like you don't want to get out of bed."

You simply let out another sleepy groan.

Then you did a double take, noticing what he was wearing.

He had on his Cloak of Levitation, but underneath that was something different. He had swapped out his regular blue robes for an Asgardian version. It was made in a different style, but it still resembled his old robes. The blue was more rich in its colour, more royal and regal looking. The wrappings were lined with a golden fabric on the edges, it went really well with his signature red and blue. It was a very stark contrast between the one you were used to seeing him wear verse this new one. But you loved it. Seeing all the beautiful clothing everyone wore here made you happy, and seeing a piece like that on Stephen was astonishing.

"You like it?" He caught you staring.

"I love it," You said groggily but happily, running a hand through your hair and sitting up in the bed.

Straightening the cloak over his shoulders, he leaned over and kissed you on your forehead. "I should head to the meeting now. We'll be done before lunch." With that he left your shared guest room, closing the large door behind him.

You wanted to fall back asleep, but it did not overtake you. It was one of those moments where you just laid there cause you were already awaken. But you wanted to sleep. But you couldn't. So you stared out the window, looking out at the pretty mountain peaks and wondering what that first meeting was about. You also wondered about the other things you were going to do while on this foreign planet. Tour of the scenery, trying more of that delicious food (you were dying over it last night at dinner), learning about its history. Maybe you would learn a little Asgardian magic while you were here. The idea of that gave you a little excitement.

A little while later, while you were lost in a daydream, there was a knock on your door. You got up and grabbed a silk robe that was on a chair by your bedside. "Come in," You said, wrapping and tying the robe over yourself. Two women came through the door, maids of the castle you assumed.

One was holding a pile of neatly folded up fabric in her hands. You got excited.

The two introduced themselves and said that Frigga sent them to wake you and get you ready for breakfast. Since the meeting was going on between Odin, Stephen, Thor, and a few others, Frigga decided to have a little breakfast gathering for you. The women were so sweet, making small talk and asking you about Midgard as they prepared you a hot bath and did your hair in a fancy braid down your back that resembled a French braid.

The moment you were anticipating soon came, and they helped you get dressed.

The dress you were presented with was a deep forest green with golden embellishments. Silk fabric sat in long layers down the skirt, trailing out longer at the back. The neckline did not dive too deep down your chest, just enough for subtlety. The short sleeves clung to the sides of your upper arms, shoulders exposed above the folded layers. The gold piece wrapped around your waist as a belt helped bring out the details. The length slightly dragged on the floor, looking elegant and glittering in the sunlight. You felt like an Asgardian princess wearing it.

It reminded you of someone. Then you wondered who had picked it...

One of the girls topped off your look with a golden pin in your hair, shaped like a flourishing lily tucked above your right ear. The two admired their work and you thanked them from the bottom of your heart. The girl you saw in the mirror was so different then yourself. You saw an Asgardian goddess, not a sorcerer.

You asked them for directions after thanking them a second time, knowing you would get lost in the giant palace. They told you where to go, curtsying to you as a goodbye. You did it back, pulling up the fabric of your dress to feel a little more into it. With one last look in the mirror, and pulling your shoulders back, you made your way out of your guest room and down the correct hallway.

You were directed to a drawing room that was down a tall staircase and a few doors to your left. There was a guard in front of the wooden door, but upon seeing you he bowed and held it open for you. The room inside was not too large, but the big open window gave the impression that it was. Decorated just as nicely as the rest of the place, this room was no exception to the royal aspect and medieval aesthetic to the palace. There were a few comfy chairs surrounding a low table, where Frigga greeted you with a warm smile.

Sitting in the seat beside her was Loki. You had not seen him yesterday when you had arrived. This made you wonder why he had not said hello to you then along with everyone else. He also was not at dinner last night. Weird. He held a tea cup in one hand as he leaned back in his chair, cradling its saucer in the other hand. Seeing Loki sipping tea from a pretty cup with his pinky finger jutting out was a different sight, a contrast to his darker persona you knew was hidden beneath.

You hugged Frigga, which she insisted on, and you sat down with them. You all chatted over breakfast and you sparking up conversation with Loki was a little awkward at first, but once you opened up a little it flowed easily. The tea was amazing and the little pastries laid out on nice platters were absolutely delicious. Frigga asked about your magic skills, and you both began to exchange stories about magic. You had a great time and you were glad you got out of bed for this. Soon Frigga had some business to take care of and had to cut this little gathering short.

When you left Loki caught up with you in the hallway.

"It has been a while since we have seen each other, Lady (Y/N)."

A lot of the people here were calling you that. And people you did not even know knew your name, which always kind of threw you off for a second or two. That told you that you were known here, from either Thor or Stephen talking. The whole 'Lady' thing was out of respect you assumed, and you did not mind.

"It has." You replied as you both walked down the hall together, "It was nice to see you again, Loki."

"How are you liking it here?" He asked with a smile.

"I love it!" You beamed, "It's beautiful, the food is amazing," You then gestured down to the dress you were wearing, "and the clothes are stunning."

He chuckled, "Green looks good on you."

"Easy for you to say, it's your favorite."

"No no," He sputtered, and you thought he looked a little...flustered? "You genuinely look beautiful in green."

A little heat ran up to your cheeks. "Oh, thanks."

There was a balcony up ahead where you saw sunlight streaming in. You picked up your pace to go look out of it, Loki right behind you. It was overlooking the back of the castle, where you could see a beautiful garden down below, before the landscape stretched out into more of the city and the mountains beyond.

For a second or two you wondered what was past those peaks. If the planet simply stopped there, or if there were forests or towns or lakes or anything else that you wanted to discover. This whole place was full of beauty and the idea that there was a possibility for more was just a little overwhelming. But you loved it.

"I'm happy you like my home." Loki leaned on the railing, looking out at the city with you. "Although it was not always considered my home."

"What do you mean?" You asked. You noticed a sadness in his eyes now.

"You know my history."

At that moment you realized what that sadness was. Probably memories flashing through his mind. You did know his history. Lied to all his life, being overcome by the sadness and anger and wrath and desire for revenge. You knew what that lead to, the New York event and everything that came with and after that. Right now, he was allowed freedom back in his home for 'rehabilitation' of sorts, offered a second chance. Not knowing what that was like, you could not relate, but you knew he had gone through pain. It was even painful to see it in his eyes.

"So do you consider it home again?" It was all you could think of to say.

He shook his head in a light nod after a second to think, the look on his features exchanged for one with a small smile. A weird thought crossed your mind, you had not seen Loki smile this much before.

The two of you stood there looking out at the city below, watching the people of Asgard go about their days. It was a calm silence that fell, not a line of tension or heavy weight of awkwardness at all. Just a calm.

"Hey," Loki said out of nowhere, and you turned your head to look at him as he spoke up, "your outfit is missing something."

You raised an eyebrow at him, coming off as almost sarcastic. "Oh?"

A smirk sneaked up on his face and you knew he was going to do something. You braced yourself for whatever it might be, good or bad or a mix of both. With a flicker of green magic, an object materialized in his hands. It was his helmet, shining gold with the curved horns. It was so polished that you could see your reflection in it.

Then he was holding it out to you.

"Oh no, I couldn't."

Loki cocked his head to the side and shrugged with a smile, again with the smiling, "Why not?"

A pause, you did not say anything because you had nothing to say. Something about it was very tempting, but it also felt forbidden. Like if you were to put it on you would be overcome by some spell or just a wave of emotion. Or just the thought of wearing something that was considered 'crown-like', because you were not royalty or a goddess or someone with high power. But it was all calling your name, with a glint of gold.

"I insist." Loki added.

After another moment's pause, you let him put the helmet into your hands. It was lighter than you expected it to be, with pure gold usually being heavy. Probably not made of pure gold then. Just a trick of the eye.

Without waiting anymore, you slowly rested the helmet on your head. Right away you noticed it was a little big on you. It was not made to fit your head, obviously, but you felt something while wearing it. Maybe honour, or pride. Or maybe just pure 'slyness', the same energy that Loki often channeled.

"Looks good." Loki beamed.

"I'm dressed like you," You snapped jokingly, "that's why you think I look good."

He laughed and you did too. Maybe I should wear more green, you told yourself.

As you both continued to watch the city below and make small talk, from down the hall you could hear footsteps. Maybe guards or other people of the palace, you presumed. But as they approached, they got louder. And they got quicker. Heavy boots, you deduced. But suddenly they stopped.

"Nice view."

You nearly jumped out of your skin as Stephen had suddenly appeared right beside you. So those were his footsteps. You had not expected him to be out of the meeting for another while, but there he was. Him and that damn short-range teleportation spell he just loved to use for some reason. There were too many instances of him appearing out of nowhere back home and it resulted to you being more jumpy nowadays. He had positioned himself between you and Loki you noticed. Loki looked just as surprised as you were, the trickster being tricked.

"Where did you come from?" Loki scowled

"Down the hall." He answered blankly. You stiffed a laugh at his demeanor, sly and confident, when realization hit you that those were aspects of his jealous and protective side coming out. Oh boy, here we go...

"I'm surprised you're out of bed," Stephen looked down at you with a raised eyebrow, which made you chuckle. You saw a tiny twitch in the corner of his eye, and something told you that it had something to do with the god opposite you and the headpiece you were now wearing.

Stephen reached forward and gently lifted the gold helmet off your head, care in his eyes and shaking fingers. Once it was off, he (not so subtly) aggressively threw it at Loki's chest who stumbled to catch it, all trace of gentleness gone. Loki gave him a mock offended look, but Stephen's own hard expression was not phased. Your eyes quickly darted between the two, seeing the tension that had now thickened the air.

"Should't you be at a meeting with Odin?" Loki said. You noticed he did not say my father.

"Oh we finished early," Stephen replied in a light tone, trying to one-up the god while bringing out his ego's confidence. "we're having another one this evening however."

Loki looked like he did not know what to do, which made an amused smile spread across the sorcerer's face. Then he straight up asked, monotone voice dropping to sound flat and serious, "Why was she wearing your helmet?"

"Because...it matches her outfit?" The god struggled to find and answer only to come up with a question instead.

"Yea, sure." Stephen mumbled, "Wonder where she got that outfit."

"Some palace maids dressed me," You chimed in, but it felt like you were invisible at the moment. There was too much testosterone in the air that was covering your existence, which made you roll your eyes.

"Green and gold are nice colours." Loki said while trying to sound convincing and innocent.

"Coincidence she's wearing them?" Stephen shot back, suspicious.

"I had nothing to do with it, Strange."

"Oh sure."

"Oh my god." You slumped against the railing and rested your face in your hands. The two went on to snap at each other and argue for a little, but it felt like an eternity. after a period of you just standing there listening helplessly, the heat started to die down.

"If you'll excuse me, Sorcerer Supreme," Loki enunciated Stephen's title like it was a forbidden word, "I should be headed to attend some business."

He tried to walk off but Stephen cut him off, "Oh what kind of business do you have to do?"

"Business that does not require a mere mortal sorcerer to stick his clever nose into!"

"Well, it looked like it was no more important then taking my girl somewhere to be alone with!" The low rumble in his voice made it a little more threatening.

With that, Loki rolled his eyes so hard it looked like it hurt. And he walked away without another word, flipping his helmet over in his hands before jabbing it on his head with visible frustration.

"Well that was a show." You said, having stood there watching the whole thing like it was a theater drama.

Stephen shrugged, "I try my best."

You laughed, "Your jealousy gets to your head."

His facial expression recoiled, "Do you enjoy my jealousy? Do you enjoy his company?"

Your jaw dropped for a second in offence, "God no, why would I enjoy making you upset?" At that you shrugged, "Although it can be amusing."

You felt a pinch on your arm which made you let out a sound of distress. Stephen chuckled, and wrapped an arm around you lovingly as you leaned against the balcony railing together.

"He was just trying to be nice, Stephen."

"I don't think he can be 'nice',"

"He was nice at breakfast,"

"You had breakfast with him?"

"I was with Frigga. He just so happened to be there."

"Okay fine."

You laughed and he gently kissed the top of your head. After a moment of quiet and peace, you felt his softly shaking hand fiddle with the sleeve of your dress, "You look very beautiful."

Blushing, you looked up at him with admiring eyes. His expression mirrored yours. He was still wearing the new robes you last saw him in, the gold linings glittering in the Asgardian sunlight. You were about to say the same thing he said to you, when his expression changed. It was his thinking face.

"What?"

Stephen must have realized something as raised an eyebrow, "There's magic in your dress."

Before you could react, Stephen waved his hand in a quick motion. Suddenly, green waves of energy flowed out of the fabric of your clothes. But they soon changed to orange sparks, Asgardian magic to Earth sorcerer magic. As they flowed over you, the colour of your dress changed. The green was replaced with blue and the gold was replaced with red. There was still a little gold here and there, lining the edges in a familiar way.

"I knew it. He must have tampered with it." Stephen grumbled.

Now your dress mimicked the colours of Stephen's clothes, their original colours. You laughed a little, the person who made your clothes thought they were clever. But also Loki thought he was clever to change it to his colours. You wondered when and why he did that, but you shrugged it off and instead admired the dress in this new perspective.

"That's better." Stephen said, a little proud of himself for some reason.

"I like this more." You giggled.

"Me too."

The dress felt lighter and the fabric shined a little more. It was made for you, perfectly tailored to your body and with the perfect colours to match. It was perfect. And it reminded you of him so it made it all the more special. If they would not let you keep it, then you are just going to bring it home with you anyways.

"Well since the meeting was cut off early, lunch is not for another half an hour or so. What should we do till then?"

"Well~" You drew out, a smile creeping up your face, "I was looking at the gardens from here and I wouldn't mind going to see them."

Stephen smiled. He offered his elbow to you, "Then do you care for romantic stroll, Lady (Y/N)?" He put on his best English accent (which was surprisingly flawless), his naturally low voice making it all the more amusing.

With a giggle, you took his arm. Together you made your way through the castle in a swish of red and blue fabrics.

"Although," Stephen started as you both made your way down the last set of stairs that lead to the ground floor, "you did look good in the green. Even though I hate to admit it."

"Hate to admit it?" You looked up at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Well it was Loki's trickery, but you look good regardless. As always."

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