#i have infact written an entire essay on them

[scarlet-sam-chaos]

do stars dream?

do you think their biggest wish might be to explode in a debacle so grand that some living being, somewhere, with civilisation will take note of it?

and considering the fact that we see the sky as it existed billions of years ago

do you think if we scream out our love for them as they are- that they need not burn to be noticed, that the bravery they have to merely shine is itself a wonder to us- do you think they would hear us?

or will we see the remnants of their existence before our voices cover the distance between?

[edit:]

IM SORRY I JUST REMEMBERED THAT SOUND CAN NOT TRAVEL THROUGH VACUUM

no wonder the stars feel so abandoned to the point of feeling the need to burn for the words of praise and affirmation they shall never recieve

[kuunibal]

"In my case, I have a tendency to be a people pleaser and help others to the point of neglecting my own wants, needs, and boundaries"

Maybe since I'm not this way naturally, I'm exactly opposite of it, so I find this whole 'giving' thing working for me. But you're like this so I assume this might not be the way for you, Infact it might drain u even more.

I hope you reach that state of mind which you're hoping for. Also, instead of wanting to ditch the quality entirely, you could try to just control it, like divert it to some place better?

Also, i can relate w the draining part to some extent, I think😅 what I did was.. Cut off all those 'draining' friends n activities that only took from me. I must've spoke n written many huge essays/paras to help ppl (perfectly acc to their problems) n despite that, they still repeated crying over the same things so mostly I was just repeating the same stuff again n again.. Ugh.. N when I went to them for smth, since they're not like this, I obv didn't get my kind of response to stuff, which frustrated me at first, but then I learnt to control my expectations. Maybe mostly ppl just need an ear. Even i sometimes. It's ok. Anyway, now I tend to avoid such ppl who can bring this in me. Like I think abt how u be replying to all our hefty msgs! I'd never be able to do this! Seriously, claps to you! Also if your darling was my friend, I think I'd help her a lot at first w her decisions in whatever ways I could, but since I'm not attracted to her, I'd stop at one point, the moment I realise she's only gonna drain me. No offence but she does sound sorta draining from ur descriptions. Like how she's coming to u w her problems! I'm not so open so I don't understand this abt her. She reminds me of some ppl in my life who were such a headache once.

True, I don’t plan on having a bastardisation arc and stop caring about anyone else but myself. I just need to better moderate and communicate my wants/needs with other people’s.

I feel that, I find that many people want to vent their problems rather than solve them, so they want emotional reassurance and support instead of advice and harsh truths. That isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but I get how it can be frustrating to see people repeat the same mistakes and not really try to improve their situation, as well as draining to only serve as some’s emotional punching bag. It’s good that you know how to distance yourself when it gets too much! It sounds like you tend to be more problem-solving oriented when it comes to giving and wanting support from others. I am similar when it comes to giving (often unsolicited) advice, so I try to ask exactly what the other person wants from me: emotional support, specific advice, or just someone to listen.

I genuinely enjoy responding to asks and reading messages! Sometimes my response time gets sporadic because I have a low social battery and a hectic schedule, but I manage!

It can be a little tough with my darling mainly because it can be emotionally heavy, but I do care about her wellbeing and there are certain things she isn’t comfortable with going to anyone else to. She doesn’t want to scare off her relatively recent boyfriend with her mental health issues and already feels like a burden, so I am glad she is able to go to somebody instead of just suffering alone. I don’t help just because I love her, I just don’t want her to get hurt or die and apparently her options are limited. But we did have conversations about how it’s not sustainable for her to rely on me for that kind of thing (I am not always available!) and that there are other people she can trust.

[feralaot]

AOT characters in school hcs </3

writing these while i sit in a zoom completely dead to the world

no warnings

modern / school au

eren

dead to the world. zones out and falls asleep all the time. how the hell does he even sleep? it’s so loud in this class what is wrong with you eren. he also yells at teachers and has the most detentions

mikasa

takes two sets of notes for herself and eren bc he won’t do it himself. he doesn’t even study them nor does he actually throw them away so he just has a pile of old notes written by mikasa that he does nothing with

armin

the only one that’s actually actively engaged in class. raising his hand, asking questions, etc. total teacher’s pet. always has honor roll and if a teacher raised their voice at him he’d probably cry

jean

just the really cryptic kid who doesn’t seem to do anything at all but is somehow passing. avoids eye contact with the teacher when they’re looking for hands but is somehow always the one that gets called on

connie

not paying attention, ever. is sending sasha memes the entire time. has had his phone taken away so so many times but it doesn’t stop him

sasha

same as connie, sends him memes during class but she also has snacks stashed in her pockets

historia

always has a water bottle. favorite subject is international relations. hydrates while taking notes <3

ymir

literally pays 0 attention she just has earbuds in during the entire class and hides them under her hair while she jams to mother mother or something. favorite subject is linguistics

hange

the cool science teacher that has set their desk on fire several times and insists on doing experiments almost every class. during a quiet work period they’d probably be so bored they fall asleep and one of their students has to wake them up. literally everything is a challenge to them. they’ll hear that erwin’s students are enjoying his class or something and they’re like oh yeah?? parry this you casual [blows something up for a demonstration]

levi

smth tells me he would be a french teacher. always has his students do things for him e.g. move desks, organize things, etc and usually has to have one of them reach things for him like books on top of shelves

erwin

yall already know this man is a history teacher. he’s usually deadpan and smells like coffee all the time but lowkey really enjoys his job and is enthusiastic about teaching history

mike

the gym teacher that always feels the need to show off for some reason. when he joins one of the dodgeball teams he loses all self control and goes completely ham

reiner

has never done an honest test in his life. always has some kind of cheeky little way to cheat his way through even though if he really wanted to he is probably smart enough to do things on his own. him and annie cheat off of each other and talk major shit about other students

bertholdt

he’s canonically good at everything he learns so I think he’d also be on the honor roll. definitely the responsible one. organizes all his notes and schedules and deadlines and turns things in on time (usually). his favorite subject is geometry because he likes shapes. “did anyone do their part of the project? guys?”

annie

also probably dead to the world. zoned out the entire time but somehow she’s always passing. very respectful so you wouldn’t guess that she’s had a lot of detentions for fighting

porco

he actually is pretty smart and could definitely do things if he wanted to. favorite subjects are english language arts and social studies but in any other classes he’s just.... not going to pay attention if he doesn’t like the topic. his motivation is nonexistent. but if you tell him to write an argumentative essay it’ll probably be 10 fucking pages long because boy oh boy does he have opinions. used to get in trouble a LOT for being disrespectful

pieck

she’s really good at math and does pretty well in most classes but her english teacher has had to talk to her several times about how “poggers” and “swag” are not academic language to use in essays. and that it is infact very rude to call fellow students daft shits

zeke

the other history teacher that has a feud with erwin. hangs out in the teacher’s lounge a lot and probably steals erwin’s lunch and blames it on those pesky students. he would never say it to any of his students’ faces but he judges them so hard like he’s genuinely disgusted when his students dont wash their hair or some shit

yelena

really quiet and really cryptic. probably prefers to sit on the floor instead of her chair

niccolo

just a friendly little nerd that everyone seems to love for some reason. if he gets picked on by someone literally all the jocks, preps, geeks, etc come to his defense 

[breakingbadfics]

Cardboard Cut outs.

There’s an entirely huge cast in Poke Madhouse. and none of them have any character or noteworthy traits  

None of the pokemon exist. The last pokemon to ever say anything on screen other than G was Mismagius. the story is remarkably bereft of pokemon for the bulk of the story and as I said much earlier in the essay it creates a really weird effect where you could replace G with another human or an alien and it would change very little of the story. 

In fact the story actually went out of it’s way to make the few stand out pokemon that weren’t G less interesting. 

There was Mismagius, an antagonist/rival/something of Gardevoir who made it her business to annoy G at every turn, and now she’s gone. we haven’t seen her since the Honesty arc where the last thing she did was tell G to maybe don’t go and do the thing thats gonna break your heart because you know thats all your gonna do.

Then there was butterfee who was surprisingly the one other pokemon that G had any real interest in the companionship. This could have been the start of a very interesting and unique set up where G in spite of being in love with C!Lily could make strides to attempt to have a relationship with someone else. but then an audience member reached out to Lily the writer and said that the way the character had been written as “child coded” had made the prospect of a romance between G and Butterfree feel creepy. So rather than adjust the way she wrote Butterfree and making it obvious that while the character was a bit simple and naive, was not a child, lily completely axed that plot idea entirely and committed in totality to the concept of G being utterly miserable when it came to any kind of relaitonship that wasn’t with C!lily. 

C!Lily is...a self insert. but also a mary sue because inspite of Lily the writer having told the audience through tumblr posts that C!Lily has all sorts of problems like anxiety, trauma from abuse, and all sorts of flaws the story itself presents none of those. and infact in a later post one of the things Lily said C!Lily’s biggest flaw was...”she cares too much” which should always be taken as shorthand for “I couldn’t think of a flaw to give this character so I’m making a positive trait into her one negative trait in an attempt to make it look like I tried” 

C!Mikaila....doesn’t have character, we actually were supposed to have a whole story arc called “Vacation”  centered on her and the pokemon and then Lily just...didn’t do that and proceeded to give us a single three panel page amongst the 9 page arc. this single page was dedicated to C!Mikaila and three pokemon.

And then, just to add to this, one can only imagine what one might think if you discovered your girlfriend and eventual fiance had a thing with her pokemon that can only be described as “complicated” at best and “bordering on making me ask if I’m the third wheel here” at worst.” You’d imagine that C!Mikaila might have a really interesting bundle of opinions and feelings on having to bare witness to this so frequently. But she doesn’t.  I wish I were lying here, C!Mikaila ought to have a lot of feelings in regards to the fact that she’s basically playing second fiddle to G at every turn, but the most the writer can think to put in for her girlfriend’s opinion is a “I try to keep out of it because their relationship is complicated and both of them have baggage” non-opinion.

C!Ginger doesn’t exist in he comic outside of like...3 pages. oh wait. just two because the third page blinked out of existence for...reasons. in spite of the fact she has the most interesting seeds for a story she doesn’t get any presence in the story. She makes no contributions to the movement of the plot. We only know she is a gym leader, and that is it. 

The story recently introduced Mara. A second Gardevoir for G to finally have an attempt at a relationship with...and...she sings. and speaks english, which hilariously run incongruous to statements about how pokemon can’t consent to being in relaitonships, or communicate their needs or be able to attend therapy. 

but personality wise Mara is an ambiguous beacon of desirable goodness. And not much else. 

And then we get to Bonnie. She’s probably one of the only things Lily hasn’t goofed up as a writer, but thats...damning with faint praise. Cute child is something most people are able to write, and even then she’s being written as the most “ideal” child. there are no tantrums, no anger, no negative traits or things that gives the parent a head ache. 

Also bonnie can casually warp reality to a degree as permitted by the rule of funny. 

These are characters in the most basic sense. 

[ittakesavillagetoraise533]

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[eloarei]

Gonna use this space to try to organize my response to / thoughts about @nomadsky ‘s ‘essay’ about the mom-friend trope, which she wrote in response to a question I asked. You can read it >>HERE<<. I’m not reblogging it to add my commentary because it’s not under a cut and I don’t imagine everyone’s interested. BUT if you want to read my response, consider reading hers first, as I’ve only paraphrased her here.  Topics: feminism, fanfic writing, tropes 

You said: Hakkai and Shiro are other examples of characters called ‘mom-friend’. --I can see Hakkai being the ‘mom-friend’, though I wasn’t involved in the fandom long enough to really notice it. I’m not into Voltron enough to know much about Shiro as a ‘mom-friend’, but I’ve never thought of him in that way, because I always see him shipped with Allura, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen a straight-shipped person referred to as ‘mom’ or ‘dad’ (whichever is opposite to their gender), though my not having seen it means little. That leads me to ask, do you find the ‘mom-friend’ trope equally harmful to both male and female characters? Or is it specifically to male characters, for likening them to a stereotypical female? If so, does that... apply also to female characters referred to as ‘dad-friend’? (Again, something I haven’t really seen, but I’m sure it happens.) (And what about real people referring to themselves as ‘mom-friend’?) You said: The trope glorifies the existence of damaging gender roles. -- I don’t have much more to say to this than is covered in the next section. You said: male character shows empathy and is then likened to the feminine, and that reflects toxic masculinity. Suddenly he doesn’t fit the male image, but instead has to be somewhat feminine. This kind of attitude stops men from expressing their emotions. -- I agree, empathetic male characters are often reduced to being feminine, which is obviously not good because any reasonable person knows men should be allowed to express emotion, etc. Saying that he suddenly doesn’t fit the male image...  I guess I’m a littttle unclear about that one. I get it, I think? But to me that seems to depend largely on what the reader/whatever thinks “the male image” means. I get that the standard or stereotypical male image is... well, you know how it is, but I guess I’m seeing a little bit of a disconnect in these points. Empathetic --> feminine. Sure, I see that. Kind of arbitrary, like most gender stuff, but sure. Feminine --> not male. I... see that, but I don’t feel it, I suppose. I don’t know why guys can’t have feminine traits. I see that it’s a common thought though. And then, I guess what you’re saying is that if men feel that showing empathy makes them girly, they won’t do it? I understand that. But to me that seems like a problem with men’s disdain for femininity, so, like... to me it feels like the problem is not just that empathy = feminine, but that feminine = bad. (Ultimately, I don’t think we’re disagreeing here, it’s just some of the finer points which are a bit foggy, particularly regarding how we ought to deal with that toxic masculinity. To over-simplify it: you suggest that we stop referring to empathy as feminine. (Not an unreasonable solution.) I suggest that we help men realize it’s okay to be ‘feminine’ (whatever that means). (Hopefully also not an unreasonable solution.) Both rely a little heavily on semantics, which means by my own rules I should stop arguing about it.)  You said: using this trope often makes writers reduce a character to stereotypes. -- I can’t really disagree with this at all. That’s certainly true, although it will depend largely on the writer’s skill, and the reader’s interpretation. I hope I’m above it, but that would be for my readers to decide.  ((The following paragraph is, I think, based on a misunderstanding of your original post, but I’m leaving it anyway. If it’s NOT a misunderstanding and that is infact what you meant, please let me know.))  You said: mom-friend/dad-friend ships create an unhealthy power imbalance. -- I guess I don’t see this one at all. I don’t know if I just don’t understand what you mean, or if it’s a difference in my perception. Who in this case has the upper hand? The ‘mom’ because they are the overbearing one? Or the ‘dad’ because men have more power? I’m not a parent yet, but I am a married woman, and I’ve never thought of ‘mom/dad’ as having a power imbalance. It... doesn’t make sense to me. I’m really tilting my head at this one. I just feel like you made a huge leap between ‘mom/dad’ ships and abuse, and I feel like I’m really missing something. Okay, unless I misunderstood you entirely and what you meant was that ‘mom’ character (OR ‘dad’ character) is often shipped with ‘child’ character which is inherently abusive??? Now that I can see, definitely. To me that’s not even something I think about because I practically never ship those kinds of ships. See now, the first time I read this post, I was coming at this section from an entirely different viewpoint, but now I think I see what you mean, particularly using Gladio/Prompto as an example. I get that, with Gladio being accepted as a ‘dad’ character, and Prompto typically being a ‘child’ character. Right. I don’t like the ship much myself, although I suppose it could be okay if they did away with the representation of the characters as ‘dad’ and ‘child’. *shrug* So, one of your problems with the ‘mom-friend’ trope is that they’re often shipped with ‘child-friend’. I get that. I don’t like it either. But I’ve never considered that as being really relevant to the trope because it’s not something I take part in. I guess I tend to think of ‘mom-friend’ more in terms of like ‘half of a pair with dad-friend’ than ‘has any sort of specific relationship with child-friend’. (Even though, yeah, that is sort of the definition of a mom.) You said: (and I’m quoting this time)  😳 ‘Admire me?’ 😳 Why would you do that? 😳 I’m honestly a badly put together mess. Nothing to admire here. 😝 -- Oh psshaw. Of course I admire you. You’re a good writer, you’re funny, and you seem like a good person, not to mention clearly intelligent! And on a fandom level, I feel like you’ve put more detailed thought into a lot of things (FFXV-related, especially), so I feel it’s only natural to defer to you in regards to these. You said: Does the way I write Ignis fall into any of the pitfalls you described?  (does he get feminised or appear weak for being caring? does he come across as more nagging and annoying than in canon? does he respect other characters’ agency and autonomy or not? and if not, is it acknowledged as problematic at some point in the story? etc.). --- Honestly: I don’t know entirely. I mean, I can look at them individually:   -- Appear weak for being caring: no, I don’t think so   -- More nagging or annoying than canon: maybe, but if so it’s because of the circumstances in the AU.   -- Respect others’ agency and autonomy: to a degree that I think is warranted by the circumstances.   -- If not, is it acknowledged? : I plan to acknowledge his lapses in ‘respecting others’ agency’. (Though I haven’t written nearly that far. That’s end-of-story stuff and woah am I ever not close to that yet.) BUT!!!   -- Is he feminised? : This I don’t know, because I don’t know what’s considered feminised. If he is, I don’t think it’s because he is caring. I like your suggestions that he could assess his own identity in regards to masculinity, but I’m not sure I’ll touch on that much in this particular story... Well actually, I probably will a little, but I imagine he’ll push it aside as being unimportant in comparison to.. the other stuff that’s happening. *shugs loosely* tbh I’m still in the planning process of anything past the first 1/10th. THANKS very much for writing this post, and being open to discussing things like this. After my first read-through of it, I was fairly stressed because I thought we were disagreeing a lot, but the process of writing a response has (I think) given me a better understanding of what you wrote. Now, it seems that we may actually agree more than I originally thought, and hopefully we’ll be able to explain any remaining differences. (If you’re interested.)  <3 

[kennthmclblg]

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July 23 - Vallegrande & The Che Guevara Museo

Tonight I am sleeping in yet another four white painted walled box with a tiny window that I cant even use because it opens to the hotel lobby and not outside. I guess when im spending only $8.00 for a room I cant be critical of what I get.

Today was an unexpectedly long day but an enjoyable day even though my butt is now permanently numb from all the bumpy mountain riding. I woke up this morning and it was yet again a impeccable day. Finally after getting through the Rainy season, and then the hail, snow, fog, extreme cold, and just about everything that comes with traveling at high altitude, im finally in an area where I get constant hot sunny weather. Im just going to keep expecting that with every nice day is the final one to save on dissapointment. I know the cold awaits me further South, the question is how far South?

After eating four delicious chicken empanada’s I packed my bags and was on the road by 8:35am. The riding from Mairana to the town im in now Vallegrande was some pristine mountain riding. The sun lit up the dry desert mountains and the air carried a bit of a morning chill which was appreciated, with good amount of wind aswell.

Vallegrande is known for absolutley nothing other than being the spot where Che Guevara’s lifeless body was airlifted to be dropped onto a table and proudly presented to the press as proof that the Bolivian army had killed the notorious Che Guevara.

My map indicated there was a mausoleum for where Che’s body and the rest of his guerilla comrades were buried in an unmarked grave around here and the remains were exhumed in 1997 to be brought to Cuba but I couldnt find it. After twenty or so minutes of searching I realised “What do I care about an empty grave?”. The sole reason for coming here was to find the school that he was imprisoned and killed in and for that I had to ride to the neighbouring village of La Higuera where according to my GPS was a short 60k away but in reality it was a very long 60k through the many ups and downs of a dusty mountain road.

The entire morning I had Che Guevara on my mind. Trying to figure out what it is about this guy that had me driving all this way to see an old building where a guy was shot. My first introduction to the man was in Grade 10 where we had the choice to choose any topic for a four page essay and the topic I subsequently chose was to argue whether or not Che Guevara was a hero or villain. Why I chose this topic still remains a mystery.I dont quite remember which side I argued for and even thinking about it this morning its so 50/50. Bolivians are put in the same moral predicament as Che is regarded and celebrated as a hero around these parts even though he as a foreign invader infiltrated Bolivia under a pseudonym for the sole purpose of overthrowing their leader (most likely in death), abolishing their government, and instilling communism. Thats pretty radical but it was their (The Bolivian) army and their government that killed him and his comrades. Its also well known that the Communist party of Bolivia did not aid or support Guevara’s revolution at all and that Guevara had zero support from the farmers, peasants, and Bolivian people in general. In the midst of the fight in the dry Bolivian mountains which lasted seven months or so im sure Guevara realised what an impossible task lay before him with roughly twenty men and dwindling supplies.

Its been exactly 50 years since Guevaras failed revolution in Bolivia fell apart. Infact around this time in July 1967 the battle was just beginning to get heated. Today people have forgetten, no one does their research, and everyone follows just what is cool and Che Guevara is “cool”. So as im walking around the very town that plastered his lifeless body on a table in victory for tabloids to photograph, his heroic image is adorned on walls and posters of him hanging in shops. Its all very strange to me, you will never see another foreign rebel celebrated and championed as much as Che Guevara in any other part of the world.l

Yet just like the man himself the situation in Bolivia in 1967 was very complicated. I dont know much if anything at all about the president or government of Bolivia at the time but I do know he was no angel, no champion of the people. Perhaps a revolution was exactly what was needed or maybe fate did the favour for us with the fatal crash of his helicopter (I have no wifi and thus cant find the presidents name) shortly after Che’s death. Maybe the Bolivian people were just lazy, timid, and submissive or maybe they foresaw the futility of Guevara’s error ridden revolution. Its been 50 years since and so yhe answers to these questions have been lost to history.

I reached La Higuera the village in the dusty mountains where of course Che’s face is plastered on every wall even more so and theres even a giant statue of him standing in a salute with army fatigue. There wasnt many people around when I rode up to the small museum, the same building Che and one of his comrades were imprisoned and murdured inside. A lady came out to unlock the door for me and when I walked inside there was an eeriness like when you know people have been killed there especially a very well known person. The lady showed me the tiny stool Che sat on when he was imprisoned whether it was or not I still ooed and awed. The tiny museum to my surprise had english descriptions of Che’s life but the bulk was all about the goings-on in Bolivia leading his guerilla brigade. Many people wrote him messages and posted them on the walls, or with flags of their country, none written in English.

I left with no better understanding of the man. I dont really care for what he did later on in his life after his own motorcycle journey but there are so many questions that keep me enthralled with his life. What exactly does it take for such a radical change to occur in a man from an upper class Argentinian family who went to University and became a doctor to then join a radical communist movement less than a year later and risk his life not even fighting for his own country? Infact it couldnt be farther away. The question stumps me completely.

Ive said it before that this moto journey is inspired by Che Guevaras Motorcycle Diaries he wrote during his journey in 1953. These diaries were even more so a giant influence for why I write my own journals every day for no reason other than opening my eyes on the importance of keeping a written first hand account of a special point in time because you never know what will happen to these writings in fifty or sixty years. Maybe nothing will happen but atleast I will have them to remind me of what a real journey is like and that I truelly lived them and not just in some ephemeral dream and for that I am indebted to Che. Strip away the communist ideals, strip away the guerilla warfare, the Che I look up to was the 24 year old motorcycling South America for no reason other than “just to travel”.

"Many will call me an adventurer, and that I am... only one of a different sort: one who risks his skin to prove his truths."

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