#i have a last name thats common with jewish people and look jewish to them whatever the hell that means

[oktobearfest]

okay so my friends from college have had a running joke with me for years that they wanted a buy an ancestry.com DNA kit because they believe im jewish but apparently ive heard they actually did it this year......................

[supercantaloupe]

okay yeah actually, i’ll bite. i’ve got some of my own thoughts about the unsleeping city and cultural representation and i’m gonna make a post about them now, i guess. i’ll put it under a cut though because this post is gonna be long.

i wanna start by saying i love dimension 20 and i really really enjoy the unsleeping city. i look forward to watching new episodes every week, and getting hooked on d20 as a whole last summer really helped pull me out of a pandemic depression, and i’m grateful to have this cool show to be excited about and interested in and to have met so many cool people to talk about it with.

that being said, however, i think there is a risk run in representing any group of people/their culture when you have the kind of setting that tuc has. by which i mean, tuc is set in a real world with real people and real human cultures in it. unlike fantasy high or a crown of candy where everything is made up (even if rooted in real-world cultures), tuc is explicitly rooted in reality, and all of its diversity -- both the ups and downs that go with it. and especially set in new york of all places, one of the most densely, diversely populated cities on earth. the cast is 7 people; it’s great that those 7 people come from a variety of backgrounds and identities and all bring their own unique perspectives to the table, and it’s great that those people and the entire crew are generally conscious of themselves and desire to tell stories/represent perspectives ethically. but you simply cannot authentically represent every culture or every perspective in the world (or even just in a city) when your cast is 7 people. it’s an impossible task. this is inherent to the setting, and acknowledged by the cast, and by brennan especially, who has been on record saying how one of the exciting aspects of doing a campaign set in nyc is its diversity, the fact that no two new yorkers have the same perspective of new york. i think that’s a good thing -- but it does have its challenges too, clearly.

i’m not going to go into detail on the question of whether or not tuc’s presentation of asian and asian american culture is appropriative/offensive or not. first of all, i don’t feel like it’s 100% fair to judge the show completely yet, since it’s a prerecorded season and currently airing midseason, so i don’t yet know how things wrap up. secondly, i’m not asian or asian american. i can have my own opinions on that content in the show, but i think it’s worth more to hear actual asian and asian american voices on this specific aspect of the show. having an asian american cast member doesn’t automatically absolve the show of any criticisms with regard to asian american cultural representation/appropriation, whether those criticisms are made by dozens of viewers or only a handful of them. regardless, i don’t think it’s my place as someone who is not asian to speak with any authority on that issue, and i know for a fact that there are asian american viewers sharing their own opinions. their thoughts in this instance hold more water than mine, i think.

what i will comment on in more depth, though, is a personal frustration with tuc. i’m jewish; i’ve never really been shy about that fact on my page here. i’m not from new york, but i visit a few times a year (or i did before covid anyway, lol), and i have some family from nyc. nyc, to me, is a jewish city. and for good reason, since it’s home to one of the largest jewish populations of the country, and even the world, and aspects of jewish culture (including culinary, like bagels and pastrami, and linguistic, like the common use of yiddish words and phrases in english colloquial speech) are prevalent and celebrated among jews and goyim alike. when i think of nyc, i think of a jewish city; that’s not everybody’s new york, but that’s my new york, and thats plenty of other people’s new york too. so i do find myself slightly disappointed or frustrated in tuc for its, in my opinion, rather stark lack of jewish representation.

now, i’m not saying that one of the PCs should have been jewish, full stop. i love to headcanon iga as jewish even though canon does not support that interpretation, and i’m fine with that. she’s not my character. it’s possible that simply no one thought of playing a jewish character, i dunno. but also, and i can’t be sure about this, i’m willing to bet that none of the players really wanted to play a jewish character because they didn’t want to play a character of a marginalized culture they dont belong to in the interest of avoiding stereotyping or offensive representation/cultural appropriation. (i don’t know if any of the cast members are jewish, but i’m assuming not.) and the concern there is certainly appreciated; there’s not a ton of mainstream jewish rep out there, and often what we get is either “unlikeable overly conservative hassidic jew” or “jokes about their bar mitzvah/one-off joke about hanukkah and then their jewishness is never mentioned ever again,” which sucks. it would be really cool to see some more good casual jewish rep in a well-rounded, three-dimensional character in the main cast of a show! even if there are a couple of stumbles along the way -- nobody is perfect and no two jews have the same level of knowledge, dedication, and adherence to their culture.

but at the same time, i look at characters like iga and i really do long for a jewish character to be there. siobhan isn’t polish, yet she’s playing a characters whose identity as a polish immigrant to new york is very central to her story and arc. and part of me wonders why we can’t have the same for a jewish character. if not a PC, then why not an NPC? again, i’m jewish, and i am not native, but in my opinion i think the inclusion of jj is wonderful -- i think there are even fewer native main characters in mainstream media than there are jewish ones, and it’s great to see a native character who is both in touch with their culture as well as not being defined solely by their native-ness. to what extent does it count as ‘appropriative’ because brennan is a white dude? i dunno, but i’m like 99% sure they talked to sensitivity consultants to make sure the representation was as ethical as they could get it, and anyway, i can’t personally see and glaring missteps so far. but again, i’m not native, and if there are native viewers with their own opinions on jj, i’d be really interested in hearing them.

but getting back to the relative lack of jewish representation. it just...disappoints me that jewishness in new york is hardly ever even really mentioned? again, i know we’re only just over halfway through season 2, but also, we had a whole first season too. and it’s definitely not all bad. for example: willy! gd, i love willy so much. him being a golem of williamsburg makes me really really happy -- a jewish mythological creature animated from clay/mud (in this case bricks) to protect a jewish community (like that of williamsburg, a center for many of nyc’s jews) from threat. golem have so often been taken out of their original context and turned into evil monsters in fantasy settings, especially including dnd. (even within other seasons of d20! crush in fh being referred to as a “pavement golem” always rubbed me the wrong way, and i had hoped they’d learned better after tuc but in acoc they refer to another monster as a “corn golem” which just disappointed me all over again.) so the fact that tuc gets golems right makes my jewish heart very happy.

and yet...he doesn’t show up that much? sure, in s1, he’s very helpful when he does, but in s2 so far he shows up once and really does not say or do much of anything. he speaks with a lot more yiddish-influenced language than other characters, but if you didn’t know those words were specifically yiddish/jewish, you might not be able to otherwise clock the fact that willy is jewish. and while willy is a jewish mythological creature who is jewish in canon, he isn’t human. there are no other direct references to judaism, jewish characters, or jewish culture in the unsleeping city beyond him.

there are, in fact, two other canon jewish characters in tuc. but...here’s where i feel the most frustration, i think. the two canon jewish humans in tuc are stephen sondheim and robert moses. both of whom are real actual people, so it’s not like we can just pick and choose what their cultural backgrounds are. as much as i love stephen sondheim, i think there are inherent issues with including real world people as characters in a fictional setting, especially if they are from living/recent memory (sondheim is literally still alive), but anyway, sondheim and moses are both actual jewish people. from watching tuc alone you probably would not be able to guess that sondheim is jewish -- nothing from his character except name suggests it, and i wouldn’t even fault you for not thinking ‘sondheim’ is a jewish-sounding surname (and i dislike the idea/attitude/belief that you can tell who is or isn’t jewish by the sound of their name). and yeah, i’m not going to sit here and be like “brennan should have made sondheim more visibly jewish in canon!” because, like, he’s a real human being and it’s fucking weird to portray him in a way that isn’t as close to how he publicly presents himself, which is not in fact very identifiably jewish? i don’t know, this is what i mean by it’s inherently weird and arguably problematic to portray real living people as characters in a fictional setting, but i digress. sondheim’s jewish, even if you wouldn’t know it; not exactly a representation win.

and then there’s bob moses. you might be able to guess that he’s jewish from canon, actually. there’s the name, of course. but more insidious to me are the specifics of his villainy. greedy and powerhungry, a moneyman, a lich whose power is stored in a phylactery...it does kind of all add up to a Yikes from me. (in the stock market fight there’s a one-off line asking if he has green skin; it’s never really directly acknowledged or answered, but it made me really uncomfortable to hear at first and it’s stuck with me since viewing for the first time.) the issue for me here is that the most obviously jewish human character is the season’s bbeg, and his villainy is rooted in very antisemitic tropes and stereotypes.

i know this isn’t all brennan’s fault -- robert moses was a real ass person and he was in fact jewish, a powerhungry and greedy moneyman, a big giant racist asshole, etc. i’m not saying that jewish characters can’t be evil, and i’m not saying brennan should have tried to be like “this is my NPC robert christian he’s just like bob moses but instead he’s a goy so it’s okay” because...that would be fuckin weird bro. and bob moses was a real person who was jewish and really did do some heinous shit with his municipal power. i’m not necessarily saying brennan should have picked/created a different character to be the villain. i’m not even saying that he shouldn’t have made bob moses a lich (although, again, it doesn’t 100% sit right with me). but my point here is that bob moses is one of a grand total of three canon jewish characters in tuc, of which only two humans, of whom he is the one you’d most easily guess would be jewish and is the most influenced by antisemitic stereotypes/tropes. had there been more jewish representation in the show at all, even just some neutral jewish NPCs, this would not be as much of a problem as it is to me. but halfway through season 2, so far, this is literally all we get. and that bums me out.

listen, i really like tuc. i love d20. but the fact that it is set in a real world place with real world people does inherently raise challenges when it comes to ethical cultural representation. especially when the medium of the show is a game whose creatures, lore, and mechanics have been historically rooted in some questionable racial/cultural views. and dnd is making progress to correct some of those misguided views of older sourcebooks by updating them to more equitably reflect real world racial/cultural sensitivities; that’s a good thing! but these seasons, of course, were recorded before that. the game itself has some questionable cultural stuff baked into it, and that is (almost necessarily) going to be brought to the table in a campaign set in a real-world place filled with real-world people of diverse real-world cultures. the cast can have sensitivity consultants and empathy and the best intentions in the world, and they’ll still fuck up from time to time, that’s okay. your mileage may vary on whether or not it’s still worth sticking around with the show (or the fandom) through that. for me, it does not yet outweigh all the things i like about the show, and i’m gonna continue watching it. but it’s still very worth acknowledging that the cast is 7 people who cannot possibly hope to authentically or gracefully represent every culture in nyc. it’s an unfortunate limitation of the medium. yet it’s also still worthwhile to acknowledge and discuss the cultural representation as it is in the show -- both the goods and the bads, the ethically solid and the questionably appropriative -- and even to hold the creators accountable. (decently, though. i’m definitely not advocating anybody cyberbully brennan on twitter or whatever.) the show and its representation is far from perfect, but i also don’t think it ever could be. still, though, it could always be better, and there’s a worthwhile discussion to be had in the wheres, hows, and whys of that.

[queernuck]

Op can you clarify/elaborate on that last post a little bit please?

so, Beto O’Rourke said that he has talked to cops wrt rifles like AKs and ARs, two common “assault weapons”, and said that they are afraid of them, that they do not want to be facing them. the right, at least, some parts of it, have seized upon that remark (understandably so, given the easiest reading of it) as being the exact point of the 2nd Amendment and evidence that Dems are looking to establish a police state and want to disarm them because they pose a genuine threat to cops.

and the thing is, if someone wants to shoot a cop? an AK or an AR is a good way to do it, all things considered!! 5.56x45 has a lot of shit talked about it but is a round with a pretty good amount of energy and low recoil in a long enough barrel and has a wound profile that will really ruin your day, regardless of if you are wearing armor or not. even the highest-rated body armor will only do so much against 5.56, and that’s not even what you would find an average cop wearing a vest for, and a cop will most of the time only be wearing a vest at best so torso, pelvic area, sides, arms, legs, head? all unprotected, and what armor they do have is going to stop 5.56 only if theyre lucky.

and 7.62x39? that round is not perfect, but it hits real hard, it can get through body armor, it’ll fuck up a car if need be. GIGN, a well-known French “counterterror” unit, has procured CZ BREN rifles chambered in 7.62x39, specifically because of the ballistics of such a round are good enough to warrant purchasing an entirely new weapon system, albeit one with a form factor relatively close to most other Western European/American designs. The Sig MCX, an AR-pattern rifle, has shown up in at least one police armory with a stock design intended to go on the shoulder while the shooter has a riot helmet with the mask lowered, chambered in 7.62x39. It’s a good round, and while there are reasons that a customer looking for new rifles would go American or Czech over Russian or Bulgarian or Polish or whatever, a Yugo AK or an SKS or any other rifle shooting it is going to fuck shit up.

to make that kinda short? an “assault weapon” is indeed a threat to police, and i honestly think thats kinda a good thing lol

the features that make an “assault weapon” what it is are not simply the round it fires: the Mini-14, M14/M1A, and SKS are great demonstrations of this principle, as are things like Saiga or Vepr or other AK-pattern rifles that had thumbhole/“sporter”/Dragunov-esque stocks for import reasons which are still capable of fucking your day up. there are rifles popular in states like NY, CA, and so on which have similar ballistics while not having the same features that would make them “assault weapons” while there are also weapons with weaker ballistics than the ones Beto is evoking that look more or less the same, like AR-pattern rifles in .22 LR.

Also, just generally the whole thing with AR and AK rifles is that there are a lot of them. They are incredibly common, ARs especially, and most will never be pointed at a person. the share of gun ownership in this country is relatively small in a lot of places, and includes a lot of people who own a whole lot of guns just because they have the money to and they enjoy having guns. overwhelmingly, this leads to gun culture being white and rich and full of “law-abiding citizens” who are fucking fascists in ideological position, but who are on the good side of law enforcement, on the good side of most conventional standards of citizenship, and as a result are given a pass for the most part. And theyre the ones who run gun stores, start gun companies, who manufacture more and more of these ARs every day for their other well-off gun-loving friends.

So, there are a lot of guns out there that fit the square peg into the round hole of what Beto is trying to get at, and if aimed at a cop they can indeed kill said cop. i know that, the people who own these guns know that, and while some of them are owned by people involved in crimes like dealing drugs or other things that are going to get them in trouble with the cops, the thing is? a lot of these guns are owned by the right-wing, who notably pointed out that the idea of a cop being scared of a gun being pointed at them for imposing unjust rule is something that appeals to them.

However, it carries a very...Ruby Ridge feeling, if you will. Fuck the FBI, fuck the Marshals, but damn if it isn’t a bad taste in your mouth when you have to say that while talking about a white supremacist. The militarized, oppressive, awful cops that are talked about by “right-anarchists” on here are ones that act on behalf of their own fascist desires, are the ones who enforce the War on Drugs, who are disappearing refugees at the border, who are killing black activists in the South, who are responsible for protecting the careers of cops that kill. The same is true of Veterans who join the “intelligence community” and end up in the CIA or as Private Military Contractors doing the dirty work of the US that is a bit too boring, distasteful, or too bad of a look for even the US Military to be doing. They’re the ones who want to topple Maduro and who think the sanctions and politicization of aid are justified, who joke about Pinochet’s helicopter rides, who call things “based” and post memes about Israel while being raging antisemites and ALSO raging islamophobes. theyre the ones driving a lot of public discourses about pedophilia away from, say, the Catholic Church and toward “billionaire satanists” that they will or will not name as Jewish depending on the approach you come at them with. Theyre the ones who talk about “black-on-black” crime while ignoring that the guns involved in most crimes are entirely legally manufactured and were then either sold illegally or stolen in a break-in, who are collectively talking about the spectre of black-on-white crime while ignoring that across just about every sort of crime both people involved usually share the same skin color. 

you know, FASCISTS.

Beto gave them an incredibly juicy talking point on gun violence, and they get to use it to superficially stand against police while they also lick those very same boots, talk about Blue Lives Mattering, when if they really want to be as edgy and cool and revolutionary as they say, they’d probably try to start running some of the guns they buy or something.

[shakingsphere]

um i need a distraction so heres a question thing that yall are supposed to send to me but i just answered all of them if ur interested

Alisons: Sexuality?

straight i think

Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?

she/her cis

Amaryllis: Birthday?

january 30th!

Anemone: Favorite flower?

idk what they’re called but these vine type flowers on the side of my porch!

Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?

atla

Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?

depends on the context, definitely nothing where they could take advantage of me

Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?

i hate quotes i can never remember any lmao

Aubrieta: Favorite drink?

.... diet coke

Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

no

Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?

maybe? he didnt love me back

Baneberries: Favorite song?

vienna by billy joel

Basket of Gold: Describe your family.

my parents are nice and supportive but overbearing and judgmental. my dad has a tendency to talk when its not his place and my mom is very jewish. my sister doesnt like me very much and is kind of rude. one of my brothers is really nice and the other is awful

Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?

I dont

Begonia: Favorite color?

green

Bellflower: Favorite animal?

red panda

Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?

night

Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?

a cat

Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

an animator 

Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?

i love kids theyre so cute

Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?

heights bc theyre scary, and unachieving because i dont want to waste my life

Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.

i used to play with ants a lot

Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?  

like if i was conscious it was my last day? i dont even know

Buttercup: Relationship Status?

single :/

Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?

central asia and iran

Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?

when im with my friends and we’re just hanging out

Canna: Do you have any tattoos?  

no ma’am i am a child of god

Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?  

my ear lobes and i want to get my doubles done

California Poppy: Height?  

5′3. it be like that

Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?

yes!!!!!!!!!!!! omg

Carnation: What are you currently wearing?  

a college sweatshirt and pj pants with penguins on them

Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?

when i was little....

Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?  

my friend hannah

Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?

i haven’t...

Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?

um lobster?

Columbine: Are you tired?

yeah lol

Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?

college and moving out of state!!

Coneflower: Dream job?

something where i can use my degree lmao

Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?

i think im an introvert but i also might just have anxiety

Crocus: Have you ever been in love?

maybe?

Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?

i would take a bullet for most of my loved ones

Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?

yes. a tie-dyed teddy bear named tie-dye. he is my husband.

Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?

aquarius

Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?

nothing that people who arent me should remember, but i think our experiences shape us so

Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?

im not dead idk

Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?  

um id probably be upset i care about my parents approval way to much

Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?

my friend hannah again lol

False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?

public speaking!!

Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?

math

Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?

um i met my future roommate, i lost a bit of weight, and i got some cute shorts

Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?

stressful! 

Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?

no

Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?

join my college’s honors program and study in russia

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?

im not doing this one too tired

Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed? 

xanax 

Hellebore: How do you show affection?

i try to tell ppl they are important to me

Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?

im funny i think

Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.

i wake up at 9:30 its 70 degrees Fahrenheit and i get lunch with some friends and then we hang out for the day

Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?  

im so bad about this all i do is watch youtube and study, but i love to draw and im going to start reading more

Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?

Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?

Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?

Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?

Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself?  

Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?

Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?

Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?

Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?  

Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?

pretty sure its french for clear or bright (depending on the context). my mom just liked it

Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.

im from a suburb of kck. its a nice and safe place to grow up but i wouldnt choose to live here

Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?

nice, but its in the basement so the view is really bad i hate that

Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?  

no nope no

Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.

she is very smart and hardworking but very judgmental and a bit inconsiderate. she loves me very much tho

Onions: Tell about your dad.  

he is short and angry. he tends to interrupt me a lot. he is supportive of everything i do. he is stingy about money tho

Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.

my mother’s mom died before i was born, and my i was never close with her father. he died when i was 8. my other grandma has bad dementia and isn’t sure who i am anymore. shes presbyterian but she would send my sister and i dreidels and such for hanukkah. im told i look a lot like her. my grandfather has been very grumpy for as long as ive known him.   

Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?

my 13th. i had an anxiety attack and had to go home early.

Peony: What was your first job?

i was a hostess at a seafood restaurant.

Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)? If you’re not in a relationship, how did you meet your crush/how do you hope to meet your future partner(s), if you want any?

Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?

i give myself time to process it and then just move forward i guess

Pink: Where is home?

where your sense of belonging is ig idk

Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change?

i would have made better grades and quit band in middle school haha 

Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.

Primrose: Describe your ideal life.

i want to be happy with 2 kids and a husband and live below my means but still be comfortable 

Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?

nihil was a philosopher. 

Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?

fuck idk my dog

Rose: What’s your favorite sound?

background noise when your sitting outside

Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?

Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?

Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?

for everything to work out!!!  

St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?

very very hard

Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?

the internet

Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?

8 hours but i overslept

Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?

i have to

Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?

i dont have a job rn and thats bad

Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?

my jeans from uo

Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic.  

cool librarian or 90s mom

Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?

160,000 dollars :)

Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?

the cost of college!!!!

Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?

oof like 2. i read Dune, and Slaughterhouse Five

Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?

college! finishing up my first semester

Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?

yeah :( 

Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.

ive been late to ap french almost every day this semester #c’estlavie

[irorny]

defenders of tomorrow headcanons bc im trash

(or just my ideas for a dystopian novel ill never write feat. voltron characters)

Defenders of Tomorrow

small bull city-based guerilla rebel force

goal: take down the three main monopolies exploiting humanity

SendTech Communications, Zarco Energy, L Motors, but more on them later

members: silicut, akira, leandro, heartbleed, ping, alzina, andrés, rowan, shuri, and ig corneilus? maybe?

methods: attack where tech companies can’t protect themselves, the real world. main method of travel is old abandoned subways. use “old-fashioned” weapons like guns, grenades, even a tank. L Motors is the biggest challenge since they’re more real-world-oriented

Ohmen

group of hackers, much larger than DOT but with less success

aim to take down monopolies by destabilizing the whole G.A.L.R.A.

name comes from ohm, unit of measuring electrical resistance

sorta rivals with DOT before eventually working together

akira, alzina, silicut, mendel, and ping have all worked with them in the past

symbol is basically BOM turned on its side bc it... vaguely... resembles an ohm symbol

G.A.L.R.A.

technically stands for Globalized Asset Legitimacy Rate Appraisal but we both know that’s gibberish, pretty much just the stock market

The Honorable Virtua is president of the GALRA

manipulates stock value so the rich get richer and small businesses never gain traction

SendTech collects, monitors, and abuses almost all human interaction to increase profit. products microphones are always on and sending data back to company, which uses the data to find people with revolutionary ideas and eliminate them. also makes designer babies.

Zarco Energy is the parent company to end all parent companies. main product is EnerGenius, marketed as a clean energy source that “runs on life, to help life run right.” To public knowledge it runs on the user’s own energy, and it does partially, but the majority of EnerGenius is harvested by abducting homeless youth and draining them of their life force (you know that scream extractor machine the purple lizard dude from monsters inc had? yeah its pretty much that)

L Motors is a transportation company that designs spaceships, drones, and operates several underground expressways, produces some short-distance vehicles for the military and the elite. restricts mobility and ability to travel for common people

akira

bastard son of zarco ceo (zoltar) and ohmen spy (kyung-hu) who was killed on a mission when he was little

silicut and ohmen took him under their wing after he narrowly escaped being abducted for EnerGenius

kyung-hu was a “defect” designer baby, usually die of genetic disorders before age 4, akira is the first person to have a “defect” parent. part of the changes in akiras DNA allow him to control tech with his mind (if you watched the last season of the flash, think killgore bc i have no original ideas)

wears silicut’s old jacket. for some reason it glows red when he wears it

ill have actual art for all these guys eventually i swear im just a really shitty artist so it takes forever

leandro

natural-born human (aka poor), extremely resorceful, adaptable, quick-witted, and hella sharpshooter

doesn’t like to talk ab his past, always plays it off well

trained to be an assassin for zarco from age 11 to support his family when he lived in cuba, mom was a sex worker and helped him hide on the underground express train of a wealthy client to get him away at 14. he hasn’t seen his family since.

wore same few outfits from when he first got to bull city for years, alzina eventually buys him new ones

old soul, loves 21st century pop culture

formed DOT bc he cant hack for shit but wanted to help somehow, team sniper

silicut

defect designer baby thrown away by parents

SendTech included listening and tracking devices on him at his parents request, used them to track ohmen, silicut willingly cut off his own arm so they wouldn’t be discovered

hardest-working and best-trained member of ohmen

part of his hair is naturally bioluminescent and violet

heartbleed

yes thats his name. his parents named him after a computer bug, but hes never been particularly good at software, just hardware. 

only one on the team with a family, kinda becomes the mom friend by default

wears grandfathers old garrison jacket and “primitive lumis” (theyre literally sketchers light up sneakers but dont tell him that)

team muscle and engineer, often poses as a security guard with shuri to complete missions in secure areas

ping

honest-to-god android, used to be human girl but experimented on themselves to try to find a way to level the paying field bewteen humans and designer babies, but became really sick from being around toxic chemicals so much. after meeting shuri, becomes inspired by 21st century comics and builds arc reactor type thing that made them lose much of what makes them human

imperative that theyre not discovered by tech companies, would be killed for research in a heartbeat

team leader and software engineer, directs missions from base camp by using own tech so team can’t be tracked

the worlds first jewish robot

lost brother, mendel, to EnerGenius which their father helped create

has glowing circuitboard-looking veins!!!! 

alzina

useless senator in an obsolete government by day, super DOT spy by night. got into politics back when she believed in the system, but has since realized that all of her colleagues have been bought out and now shes willing to do whatever it takes to restore peace and justice.

afro-south asian designer baby, parents opted not to put tracking and listening devices on her, but hair and parts of her skin are purple and bioluminecsent. married to rowan.

originally worked with ohmen to bug sellout government officials, silicut introduced her to DOT and shes now team spy/liaison to big companies

comes from a rich, well-respected family and ends up using much of her money to buy nice things for the team

rowan

born into one of the few remaining middle class families, parents sold L Motors products for a living and hoped they would have a son whod be able to climb through the ranks and make a better life for himself. got a trans lesbian revolutionary instead. 

trying to bring back journalism, met wife alzina by interviewing her for her work. the instant chemistry made more than a few readers cringe.

team’s go-to for recon missions since shes highly observant, asks all the right questions, and can blend in with a crowd easily

shuri

named after black panther character, comes from family of miners in the mountains

hijabi, and often smuggles contraband or conceals a small weapon under hijab

sometimes heartbleed sits next to her when she prays in public to make sure no one walks in front of her

really sweet, but also the team muscle and could kill a man with her bare hands if she chose to

corneilius

representative of planet earth

sold out to zarco when he was younger in exchange for being reelected every term

supposed to have a lot of power in his position but is really just a huge bobblehead

cant take anything seriously, as a result most of earths problems go neglected by the government

[asmakahf]

Someone Loves You, and You are Not Aware of it yet!

Suppose there's a 3 year course in Language.

First Year they teach alphabets

Second year they teach Grammar.

Third year they teach how to make proper sentences.

If Third year students could make sentences of the same language Doesn't it prove they were very much part of the whole curriculum?

This example means Christians, jews, Muslims are consecutive religions, one completes the other. Each is incomplete without other.

Christians, Jews and Muslims are not three different religions.

They are religions of different centuries.

When messengers of each religion came they were denied and bothered by the then enemies of faith.

These enemies of faith had similar reasons for rejecting the message, that was some worldly/personal loss.

But the moment messengers left the world almost all people follow the religion, because then finally they come to now that messengers dint have any personal ambition and He wished well for people.

The denial of Prophet Mohammed s.a.w by jews and Christians of that time and this time is illogical.

Have seen lot of scholars of these religions go deep in history, terminology of ancient languages, minutes details about what might have happened

You dont need to be history expert for using common sense.

Be it Prophet Moses (Peace be Upon Him)

Or Prophet Jesus (Peace be Upon Him)

Or Prophet Jonas (Peace be Upon Him)

They all gave message about God and people or tyrants bothered them, rejected them and subjected them to pain, difficulties and suffering.

They had few followers for long time, their popularity reached far, generation of thier time discussed them and amazed by them.

They gave messages which was easily accepted by some, they had small group of loyal people with them.

Each Prophet (Peace be Upon Him) showed a miracle in something that was valued by people of that time.

Some Prophets showed miracles which was beyond Any magic of the world,

Some cured people, some brought food from sky, etc.

This history forms a pattern, this pattern is made obvious by Divine power.

Why? So that corrupt people who obviously manipulate truth, can never hide what was known through the ages.

Why truth is hidden?

It's hidden because it harms worldly desires or profit of some people.

Moses (Peace be Upon Him) was rejected because his message that God is one, unseen, harmed Pharaoh who made people fear him by saying that he is God .

Similarly messages of Prophets ( (Peace be Upon them) were rejected by people who thought if they accepted it then they would lose something.

Some thought they would lose wealth, some thought they will have to leave adultery, interest and some religious people thought they would lose position of being highly respected.

When THIS pattern is UNIQUE to PROPHETS.

How can any sane person refuse to believe in Prophet Mohammed (Peace be Upon Him) when HE SUFFERED THE SAME THINGS, SHOWED MIRACLES, PEOPLE AROUND HIM COULD SWEAR HE NEVER LIES?

Accepting Prophet Mohammed s.a.w was difficult for Idol worshippers, but it was easy for jews and Christians as they had scriptures, they knew and learned how people treated Prophets in the past. They had an idea what sort of atmosphere is created when a Prophet starts sharing divine message. It should have been doubts free and firm belief in Prophet Mohammed (Peace be Upon Him) when he was sharing stories of other prophets, even though he couldn't read or write nor was he from Christians or Jewish family to have heard detailed account of prophets.

His initial story was so similar to Prophet Abraham (Peace be Upon Him).

I Think the best example of people who reject Him (Peace be Upon Him) is like a group who was told there will come to them a guest, and they have to treat that guest well for he is important official. If they treat him well their issues will be solved.

All of them waited eagerly to welcome him, then a black man entered.

They pushed him aside saying an important person is expected, move away!

A few of wise people understood that this is the much awaited person, treated him well and took him with them. And this group kept waiting and waiting and they taught thier generations to wait for him!

So this is rejection of truth due to lack of humility and arrogance.

Its arrogance because they decided and were adamant about what the person of high importance should look like!

It was height of ignorance and stubborn mindset that stopped them from getting benefits of truth.

When Prophet Mohammed (Peace be Upon Him) declared truth, fulfilled every criteria of being in touch with Divine power yet some jews and Christians rejected the message because it was thier obstinance that The last messenger should be from thier group.

They had really shallow fears, the priests thought they would stop getting money from worshippers, will have a lower position now and will have to change their entire way of conducting themselves and upset the rich and powerful people of that area. Some also had fears whether they will be abandoning their beloved religion,

To ALL these QUESTIONS They got answer through Divine message communicated by Prophet Muhammad (Peace be Upon Him),

These were answers to clear not just doubts but burst the lies and propaganda.

For example- It was said

Those who traded truth with lies for money will have painful torment in hereafter.

There will be double reward for those Christians and Jews who accept Islam because they believed in what was revealed before and after.

Those who misguide people will abandon them on the day of judgment and they will say to their followers why did you follow us, My lord Punish them and leave me.

Is idol worshipping or worshipping of things and humans different from these religions, and has no connection with these religions?

Just like Islam connects Christianity and Judaism ,it Equally connects all forms of worshipping.

The first ever Prophet who faced disobedience of people, it was because of Idol worshipping. It was Prophet Noah (Peace be Upon Him) whose story of making arc is known by all.

The pattern is same. Nobody can claim tomorrow on the day judgement that they dint get information about Prophet or religion or One GOD.

We have documented proves,authentically carried through generations about religions and Prophets.

If there be any doubt you can see human behaviour, and pattern there won't be any doubt.

As per records , idol worshipping started when people lost a great Person they respected and loved.

First They thought they should make a statue which resembles to him so that they keep remembering him and it will help them in guidance.

Then they started visiting that statue, then touching it one thing after another, soon they were wiping thier head with mud of that statue.

You ask even today Why idol worshippers worship stone or things

They will say its a matter of faith, it gives them strength and they feel the presence of God when that statue is around. And mostly they get upset and angry like people got Angry with Abraham (Peace be Upon Him) saying things like how dare you say anything about Our Gods, you are sinner, you will be dead, but what they couldn't answer was a simple question when a thing needs you to carry it, when u ask it doesn't talk, when you break It doesn't even protect itself, when you have more faculties then it has, How CAN THAT BE GOD, WHO IS SUPPOSED TO BE EVERYWHERE, ALL HEARING,ALL POWERFUL?

Even today we know one thing, when person who doesn't have answer and doesn't want to be changed for good starts fighting in the name of religion but can't face the simple logics for the unnecessary fear of losing out on his religion.

Hence Prophet Noah((Peace be Upon Him), other prophets, Prophet Abraham all spread the message of God, that God is Unseen, HE is one, He has Power Over everything and HE doesn't need to take shape or form for you to worship HIM.

Never worship something thats created or made by humans , nor should you worship things that are created by LORD, sun moon, sky, fire, earth,other humans.

I request you to know about Prophet Mohammed (Peace be Upon Him) so that you experience the beauty of worshipping Lord in ways He (Peace be Upon Him) Taught us.

Islam Makes you self dependent, good human and changes perception of life in such a way that you won't run after shallow things.

Once you get to know Islam you will know its way of life. IF you have read it till here, am sure You are person of intelligence and emotions. DO TRY TO KNOW ABOUT ISLAM. TAKE YOUR TIME, BUT KNOW IT FROM CONVERTS OR MUSLIMS personally.

Ever since i came to know the reality of media and entertainment industry, it bothers me how people who would have known truth easily are Being misled and kept away from something so precious that can heal them, help them and improve their life in ways they can't imagine.

[go-redgirl]

Bill de Blasio on Hanukkah Attack: Trump’s ‘Hateful Speech’ Emboldened Violent Forces.

On Sunday broadcast of MSNBC’s “Weekends,” New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio commented on five people being stabbed in an attack at a synagogue in New York’s Rockland County.

De Blasio said, “For the last three years in this country the forces of hate have been unleashed, and we see more and more violence associated with those hateful impulses. Some of it organized and premeditated. The uptick in hate crimes in this city has led the NYPD to recognize we’ve got to get under the skin of these trends and see if they can disrupt them.”

He continued, “We’ve also known for years that there are white supremacists forces that are organizing to do violence. We know about the militias in some parts of the country. They’ve targeted law enforcement. These right-wing militias have targeted law enforcement for years in this country. Unfortunately, that trend is growing, that form of extremism. We’ve got to be able to track it and disrupt it in a way that, honestly, we didn’t face before in the city, nor much of the country. But let’s be honest, the last three years everything has changed. Once hate gets normalized, it spreads like wildfire, and it takes a more violent form, and we’ve got to stop it now before we end up making the wrong kind of history.”

He added, “It’s not a time for a partisan discussion, but it is a time to say some of the most hateful speech is emanating from Washington, D.C. What we need our president to do is be a unifier, a calming positive voice, reminding us of what we have in common as Americans. That’s what presidents have done for generations. We’ve missed that. 

And the hateful speech even if it’s not inciting specific violence, let’s face it, we have seen these violent forces emboldened. We saw it in Charlottesville. We’ve seen it all over the country. And we’ve got to be honest about it without falling into a partisan battle to say something is different in recent years. I’ll be the first to say there were other problems before that. There were campus shootings and other horrible things, but the connection to racial and ethnic motivation, that has been growing in the last few years, and that’s what we’ve got to stop.”

READ MORE STORIES ABOUT:

Clips Politics Bill de Blasio Donald Trump Hanukkah

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INDIVIDUALS/COMMENTS/POSTS:

Jeffrey Dodd 

The only idiots dumber than this ass are the people who actually believe him.

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John Truman Paul Gerst • 4 hours ago

Disgusting comment by DeBlasio.

And such a lie.

And such a lie.

These kids are #TeamFarrakhan #TeamObama

The outbreak of NYC crime has nothing to do with "white."

Dems want to turn "white' into a synonym for "enemy."

Nothing more racist than that.

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Dave W John Truman •

This year its become open warfare against the police. For deblasio to blame white supremists? No wonder NYPD turns their back on him

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C C Dave W • 4 hours ago 

As ususal a liberal leader is passing the buck on his own failed policies. DeBlasio is a disgrace and an embarrasment to his city. That his constituents would vote this clown into office speaks volumes about their IGNORANCE. Trump has it right----liberal voters are LOW IQ!!!!

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Trump Train aka Honey Badger C C • 4 hours ago

Racist 0bama created this he put targets on the backs of our protectors. Just a quick look at the homicides in Baltimore, Chicago and other D-Rat cities tells you everything you need to know about criminal democrat run cities. DeBlasio should be arrested for inciting racist hate against 63 million Trump supporters. When they blame Trump they blame US.

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Schrödinger's cat Trump Train aka Honey Badger 

The person who is running NYC so badly is Blaming Someone Else (BSE mad cow disease !!!)

That is how Democrats roll !!!

MAGA 2020

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noman Schrödinger's cat • 4 hours ago

Why not? Newsom is blaming the crap on SF streets on--Trump.

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gman noman • 3 hours ago • edited

It looks like Bill de Blasio blames everybody but himself for the problems in his own City.

Sounds like your typical Democrat. White supremacy? Was that attacker in New City wearing blackface? Did I miss something? LOL

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jordanminn gman • 3 hours ago

Let me get this straight..........

President Trump is the most pro-Jewish President...........

EVER...........

yet he is to blame for Dem anti-Semitism???

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Deplorable_Shadow_Ax jordanminn • 3 hours ago 

"It's not a time for a partisan discussion..." ...He says right after engaging in a partisan attack against President Trump and his supporters. I would say that the hypocrisy is stunning, except that it is the norm for Democrats these days. Constantly accusing us of what they, themselves are doing. Smh.

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Spock Deplorable_Shadow_Ax • 3 hours ago • edited

Democrats are some serious projecting sick fooks. The 180% off party.

Calling good evil and evil good. What shall it profit a man to gain the world only to lose his soul? (Paraphrased from bible.)

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Bret Rekcah Spock • 2 hours ago

All the antisemitism I read or see about are from democrats or leftists. They hate Israel. As Levin says as well, there are many self hating jewish people in this country.

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Spock Bret Rekcah • 2 hours ago • edited

0bama, the most un-American American president, ever, was "community-organizing" in Israel to prevent Benjamin Netanyahu's (A clear-headed, sane patriotic leader) re-election

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Nick Danger Sway Snub • 2 hours ago • edited

Pathalogical liars De Blasio and A. Cuomo are both blaming Trump's rhetoric. In fact, real actions are to blame. Allowing more Muslim refugees in NYC, bail reform, hamstring the police, and general, albeit typical, Dem incompetence. These two are cockroaches trying to cover their own stupid policies with blatant lies.

PS: There is an article out today noting that NYC is no longer safe for business. Good job Dem's.

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Silence DoGood Bret Rekcah • 2 hours ago • edited

Amazing. The Marxist Democrats are so good at blaming the consequences of their own dysfunction on to Republicans. Notice how Democrats NEVER take responsibility for problems that have long existed in cities and states they have LONG run!

Constantly pawning the blame off. They are champion liars, and Masters of Deceit.

It's funny, because they are Socialists, make no mistake about it, and another Socialist, Hitler, touched off World War 2 with a false flag at Gleiwitz.

I'm convinced the left is planning a false flag event, as they are terrified of Trump winning in 2020.

https://www.historyhit.com/...

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L5P Silence DoGood • an hour ago

Democrats are so good at blaming the consequences of their own dysfunction on to Republicans. Notice how Democrats NEVER take responsibility for problems that have long existed in cities and states they have LONG run! Democrat solution: cut back on arresting perps in the name egalitarianism until the.....

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OPINION:   Bill de Blasio Is The Mayor Of New York, And Its his Responsibility As Mayor To Do His Own Job As Mayor.  

Stop Trying To Blame The President Of The United States For Your ‘Lazy’ Do Nothing Job.  Bill de Blasio Is A ‘Loser’ By All Definition.  And He Has The Poorest ‘Rating’ Of Any Mayor In This Country.  

He Need To Be Voted Out Immediately.   Don’t Blame President Trump For Your Own Incompetence.  Bill de Blasio Is A ‘Lazy’ Rat And One Of The Worst Mayors New York Has Ever Elected.  He Has Nothing To Show For Any Progress In New York That He Had Done. 

 Bill de Blasio Performance Has Been Rated As F-.  Thats The Lowest Anyone Can Get.   Every Low Life In This Country That Hasn’t Done Anything For Their City Or State Is Trying To Blame The President.  Well Its Not Going To Work.  

You Just Need To Get  Up Off Of Your ‘lazy A** And Do Your Own Job. Many Need To Ask Themseleves The ‘Millon Dollar’ Question.  What  Were You Doing Before Donald J. Trump Was Elected President?  

The Answer Is ‘Nothing’ But Wasting Tax Payers Money. And, The Fact Is, You Are Still Not Doing Anything Positive For Your Own State.

Let The Truth Be Told!

[cold-iron-burns]

We've come to a consensus.

Everyone present at the time of this writing will do their best to inform the ones who need the support of a gentle delivery of current events.

The ayes have it.

YOU WOULD HAVE A PARLIAMENT AS YOUR COMMUNICATION SPACE

what's wrong with that? if we all actually do our jobs, so many more of us will be represented

THATS A LOGICAL ARGUEMENT, BUT WHO IS REALLY GETTING REPRESENTED

-wait WhAt?! HoW mAnY oF yOu ArE tHeRe

Oh honey, more than you will ever know. It's gonna be okay. We found each other and that's what's important. We're gonna start introducing ourselves,

*or at least, becoming more clear*

I love all of you so much, thank you so much for letting me in, for being patient with me. I think I'm the host? what iss. @ -o{oo#t?

started dissociating, it felt physically painful. the documenter.

And the enchanting lady is? *turns to tip his hat and wink at the camera* A -name-? Do you honestly think I could have settled on any name? Any singular--yes, Zed is going to sleep. I'm very fond of him. Attracted to him? He is my Adonis. Every inch of his body is particularly unique to his position in spacetime. There will never again be a Zed in which he appears, feels, smells and tastes exactly the same as he does at this exact moment, continued, forever and so on, as far as you know, infinitely. The Philosopher.

Wait, no, the Philanthropist

Wait wait NO, I stand by The Philosopher (for now)

[hold up, are y'all tellin me -- you c'n cawl me your White Trash Sweetheart, get rid of that bracket there, that's for the Host now

she doesnt know if she's the host or not, wibblywoooooo~ teen punk brat? aww man, fuck you you stupid piece of shit

hiiii yeah hi, I'm post-apocalypse punk Mayor (yes, you can call me that, but its aspirational) wow very humble -- golf commentater (now based on ugh this is important remember the actress' name, you look stupid, don't just stand there staring off into space, GET BACK TO WORK

OH YEAH, hi BiTcH --oh he's gone, that's -too- bad. well, as I'm here anyway, we should get to know one another. I'm "sassy black woman" because you're ashamed people will think you're using me just for drama and that's pretty fuckin racist--

I'm Final Form Chie. I started as so many of our seeds do, a poor slave girl, who loses her virginity yeah it's okay to make shortcuts

FOCUS

she gains skills, proves useful to the master, destroys the master (sometimes with kindness sometimes literally depending on what we need at the time)

[I didn't know it was that specific]

I'm mixed, actually, but I'm inspired SO MUCH by Claws. FUCKING REPRESENTATION FINAL--

>nope nope nope, shut it down<

John Cleese?

not exactly. A bit like the entire cast of monty python rolled into one. I'm from the countryside, but I can't say for sure where

woooooo we almost lost her there. she was panicking about losing this productive high, but she pulled through and FOUND THAT RUBI. Small Town Beauty Queen. I don't find it insulting if it helps you remember me. I started as Fern of Charlotte's Web. I keep that mournful lullaby for you. It really changed your path, dear heart. I don't become Miss America or anything, I'm too old by that time. But I love my family so much. You have so much anger

Yes, that's right, Dearie. Maiden, Mother, Crone. We don't think it was intentional but we like the power we have when we cooperate. Yes, we guide ... oh honey, don't cry, it's gonna be okay. no, n-n-no, no, you don't h-h-have to oh no, I really don't want to be here, I wasn't sure what to wear before, oh, I've gotten comfortable and I'm stuttering less. No, I don't think people who stutter in real life have this drastic of

oh, oh my. oh no, I'm still Achates.

Does it really surprise you? Chie and Amaury loved me so much that they couldn't bear to part entirely. They feel loyal to answer when you call on them when recalled in memories; they consider it their duty to fight in sharing our stories! With Pictures!

I don't need pictures

Don't you? you need to sleep, you're exhausted and you have an appointment tomorrow. Please go the fuck to bed. Slightly Extra (okay kinda actually just really ~(EXTRA)~

okay how do I... Ah, I got it. I'm the lucky early gen x mom you both wish you had -- no, we are not combined, sugar tits.

I'm the hardass 70s-80s mom you would have had if you're life was a movie. Well, technically I can mask as any kind of 70s-80s media mom (one of y'all--us! oh, yes, i hear you. I want you to know I would protect you, Kevin. MOM UGH

keep going - the sprites (soot or rainbow, we shift to suit your needs. we might steal your shoes. we are only some of the fae court. crossover unknown cannot compute - PLEASE HURRY. GOOD. I AM THE ROBOT OF THE 80s and --scratch that record

I'm that part of you who knew she couldn't look like Zach Morris and wanted so badly just to be a little boy. You were SO CONNECTED with the host when I was there?

wait, I'm the host

no, you--you are now because writing takes concentrating which you are losing quickly. Hello! I'm Sassy Progressive Upper Class CONCENTRATE, DAMMIT. GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER. I don't care if I sound like -your-mom. Someone has to be the mom around here!

Someone has to be the mom around here.

Who wrote it?

you are high af.

keep letting your eyes go out of focus, yes you're getting sleepy, think how nice the bed will feel on that aching body. She deserves some rest, the old girl.

My body is a cow? wait, there's more. she shifts to being omniscient for scenes, if a cowsona (oh, yes, Buana and Gaushala and Pirwa ... Gaushala still has an arrow in the heart.

Yes, WoW Chie (Chiela will do.). I was here while you built your confidence to try... yes, dear, you really should sleep. TO TRY GETTING CATRIN AND RIAIN A HOME AFTER being abandoned when some of you lost the "spark" or whatever with Michael. I orchestrated some of the setup. you don't need to know my name. I'm both Italian immigrant/WHOA DO NOT EVEN CONNECT THE JEWISH COMMUNITY TO--NO, We Dont...*clears throat, drinks water*. No, you're not wealthy like Ms. Maisel, -we-, sorry, sometimes I have to pretend. Speaking of pretending, no, kid, I'm not as funny or talented as all the wonderful Jewish actresses (yeah yeah, Italian-American you, whatever his+her names are, we'll get to you later)

oh nooooo they're not sure if they'll fit the stereotype if they get loud but they wanna

yeah, sure kid, we sound a lot alike. we exist in a liminal space in which America (and new york city) (and every big american metropolis)... we can all celebrate our differences

It's alright, you just need to focus. I'm 90s Successful Well Paying Professional (I can be in the late 80s WA>T)

you're just stating tropes you stupid bitch

whale!

MISS PIGGY

LOOK AT HER FAT FINGERS

remember when you -hold on- hold on for me, my love lovely?

~do you wanna be my lover, gotta get wit my friends, make it last forever cause that's the way it is"

some of us havent learned to swype yet, fuuuuuck. you're popular--but not top tier popular 4th grade 4H champion with all the ribbons. you'll grow up (yes it's hard, i want to be a teacher one day. I'm based on Angie. I'm the imaginary life you might have led if your family wasn't so difficult. We should give them credit, everyone's trying their best. Oh, I can take on mom duties when I need, we also have kids in our future. We live in Lagrange (my husband and I, at this point in the line) but we don't make as much as our parents yet, though. Yet. Yes, I know what it feels like to feel content but maybe have some (or a lot of) wanderlust in life. I'm ten or so years older than you, so while our dedication to staying in Lorain County is important to the values we wish to impart on our children (yes we are Christian. We love Sharon with all our heart and we're so glad (there's a small congregation of us, maybe enough to fill a quiet one room cottage on Sunday, God willing. I'm inspired by the Amish women I see selling their wares and replicate "Amish" methods when making food for my family (I'm good friends with The Baker. We watch Steven Universe with you! We're so excited for the movie and hope we get to talk to you about it! I showed it to Chip and Carol, well I keep talking with them about it and they agreed to get around to watching it with me. I want to be a good ally. I'm, you know, only a little bi. I know that's probably inappropriate--oh- okay, oh, my, oh WOW are my hormones nuts. I'm pretty enough but nerdy enough that I'm kinda in a weird middle tier of popularity. Haha, oh, that's funny. I'm part Sunday (we miss her! some of us are so jealous of her we want to claw her comfortable boomer life from her hands.

That's awful. Shame on you. Suffering is relative.

SHE HASN'T EVEN SUFFERED A FRACTION OF WHAT I SUFFERED

Oh yes. You are the raw emotion of what the Host(?) feels when listening to Jekyll & Hyde, but only the certain version claws at our hearts

We salute the departed Host.

I miss her. Many of us do. But she crumbled under the pressure of knowing too much. She remembered too much before she was ready.

Parliament: We [redacted for time] ...salute her memory. She fought well, carried her armor, was ready to take on anything and change the world, even if in a small way.

She's Not Dead.

sprites: {hushed whispers to avoid being heard by parliament} {WAIT, NO, WE ARE NOT THE HOUSE OF COMMONS}

there's a lot of you when you get mad.

@@@@@@ Angie no, please don't put me to bed. I'm gonna be a computer genius - I mean, maybe not genius and did you know colleges could pay you to get a Bachelor's degree, it's called "scholarships", I mean, this changes -everything-!

I love you, Cameron. I came first, but you gave me a perfect form. I help the others feel calm. Community is punk, but is corporate entanglement the final destination-- hey, wait a minute, I'm not done talking!

whoa bitch. I mean, we have to mention joe. want to be him, want to fuck him, His story, too, is tangible to me. maybe we're a package deal now, ha! I'll try to remember the good times more than the bad, for the health of all of us.

SO SAY WE ALL

wait, what the fuck are you trying to say

hey, it's cool, it's cool.

nah it aint cool

STOP IT STOP FIGHTING

let's think about date sugar

Ah. That was a good distraction. but we really must be off to bed.

is this productive?

Love, it's okay to be sad about losing the real Ben. \It's okay to have any kind of feeling at all.

Ladies and gents and nonbinaries and everyone else, please at least get up into the bed to think about flickin the bean. More like taking a bush-hog to a lil baby bean sprout, but whatever. let the rest of us lie down.

night y'all!

:)

[rehnro]

I seem to enjoy the free walking tours wherever I go (more or less). They often offer a more fun way to explore the city and feel less like an outdoor history lesson. So after my tour in Lisbon in February, Amsterdam was naturally next this time with http://www.freedamtours.com. At last, I need to gain some knowledge prior to the arrival of visitors later in April. So below is what I will tell them (so if you are coming over … please stop reading here ;o).

Where does the name Amsterdam come from? Amsterdam was built on swamps as a fisher village in the 12th century in the location that is now central station. Water ingress was obviously a big nuisance, so the people built a dam on the river Amstel. As you will have undoubtedly guessed by now, thats what gave the city its name. 

Why the narrow (squeezed) houses that never look entirely straight? Back in the days, the taxation of houses was by width and I guess land wasn’t cheap either. So people built narrow, high houses instead. The staircases are worthy of a mountaineering training session. Given the complications that implied for moving places, all houses are fitted with a hook and pulley at the building’s gable to move stuff through windows. So that you don’t hit the wall constantly, the houses are also forward leaning. Further, since the Dutch built on a swamp the houses needed some form of stable fundament by ramming tree trunks into the ground. On average its 40 trees for a normal sized house.

What do Amsterdam, sailors, prostitutes and children have in common? They have in fact the same patron saint – Saint Nicolas. He is also the saint of pawnbrokers, merchants, the country of Russia and the city of Moscow. 

Sex business & the church: That goes back a long time and is closely related to the Dutch marine efforts. Back then, sailing was a high risk job as many boats didn’t return from their expeditions. Naturally, the surviving sailors partied hard before heading to their next quest. Prostitution and partying sailors went hand in hand even though it wasn’t legal at the time. As so often, the Dutch took a pragmatic approach of tolerance. They preferred the sex trade to ‘good girls’ falling into sailors hands. Now, another thing with sailors was that they were rather superstitious. So they felt uneasy to leave the shore as sinners … and got absolution from the local churches (either before or after the act had taken place). Good business for the church and one reason why there is quite a lot of churches in Amsterdam. 

Why is it called the ‘red light district’? The name seems to originate from the red lights that were used to indicate the business is open. It also has a favorable side effect to wait for customers in red light since it gives you a nice makeover and lets your skin look better. There are also blue lights to be found in Amsterdam – they indicate transsexual workers. 

The miracle of Amsterdam … be underwhelmed! Even before the Spanish arrived the city was a pilgrimage destination owing to the ‘miracle of Amsterdam’. A dying man was given his holy sacrament e.g. given bread representing the body of christ. He vomited and the vomited bread was put into the fire. While the man died, the bread survived the fire and was then recognised as a miracle. A pilgrimage church was erected and many people came to the city (more business!). 

Talking religion: Being home to some 250 nationalities, the city has to be reasonably pragmatic when it comes to religion. Originally Holland was Catholic owing to the Spanish king, himself a catholic, running the country. That, however, changed when Martin Luther entered the stage. You see, as a catholic it was always a little troublesome to be too rich while it is much more tolerated for protestants. The Amsterdam’s, especially in the golden age of the 16/17th century, liked that (e.g. now they wouldn’t have to go to hell).

Church ‘Our god in the attic’

Attic fits 150 people

The Spanish sent an army to mend things, but were defeated in the 80 year independence war under the leadership of William of Orange. Catholicism was then outlawed for 150y, but again in Dutch style tolerated if practiced behind closed doors. That’s why you have many hidden churches that were constructed in normal residences and often are still in service today. Being now on the side of non-catholics caused a major influx of people especially in the period of the spanish inquisition including many jewish people (that further brought sea maps to holland from the then pre-eminent marine power – Portugal – helping the rise of the dutch east & west indian companies and a key fundament for the Dutch golden age).

Coffee Shops & Marihuana remain a grey zone with a lot of tolerance and a good portion of looking away: If you thought weed was legal in Holland – think again. It is not, but tolerated. You can possess 5g and even grow up to 5 plants and coffee shops can sell the gear. They can’t, however, buy the gear legally wholesale and so it magically appears in their storage. Weird, but politicians turn a blind eye (although there were coffee shop closures nearby schools to avoid being only able to sell weed to locals in Amsterdam). Coffee shops also can’t advertise, are called ‘coffee shops’ rather than ‘weed shops’ and also tend to pay higher taxes. Why is the government looking away? Well, that goes back to the hippie days in the 60’s & 70’s when Amsterdam had a drug/heroin issue. Nowadays large coffee shops like the Bulldog sold gear already then illegal. The governments approach was similar to the sex trade centuries earlier – rather than banning it outright, it decriminalised consumption in coffee shops it get people off the streets. And it worked. Italy, France and Spain have something to learn judging by user statistics. 

Dutch courage – heard that before? As the story goes, the Dutch used to drink Jenever (Dutch gin) before heading into battle with the english during the Anglo-Dutch wars in the 17th century that gave them courage. So basically they fought intoxicated. Later on, the english developed gin based on Jenever. 

The Dutch going state side: The Dutch were among the nations trying to discover a North West passage to India and commissioned capitain Hudson to do so. Instead of India, they ended up with a East US settlement that was named New Amsterdam. During the Anglo-Dutch wars (I think the second), they lost it to the britsh who renamed it New York in honor of the Duke of York. Still, there are many areas in NY left that have Dutch origin such as Haarlem, the Bronx and Brooklyn. Wall Street was a defense wall back then and the not so grid like streets below wall street still rem ind of that today.

Amsterdam walking tour: Fun facts I seem to enjoy the free walking tours wherever I go (more or less). They often offer a more fun way to explore the city and feel less like an outdoor history lesson.

[samanthasroberts]

‘I know their vital stats, their romantic histories’: how Sunderland AFC saved me

For this Chinese Jewish Texan, England was a difficult place to feel at home. But all that changed when she discovered football

Thats shite, man! the man behind screams. The discontent in the crowd is reaching a critical mass. Useless twats, snarls a father below, opening a packet of crisps for his nine-year-old son.

I stand frozen, wrapped up in a scarf and down jacket. Who are we yelling at? Why are we so angry?

Its Boxing Day 2012 and Im at the Stadium of Light in Sunderland for my first ever football match. Its freezing cold; it begins to rain. And then it happens. A Sunderland player fires a shot that creeps past the Manchester City goalkeeper and into the bottom corner of the net. The stadium thunders as a sea of 46,000 bodies fall over each other, total strangers hugging their neighbours, while simultaneously jumping up and down. The man next to me screams so loudly in my ear that Im momentarily deaf. Then he turns me towards him, grabs my shoulders, locks eyes with me and shakes my body. Ahhhhhhhhhh! he screams, in happiness and disbelief.

Ahhhhhhh! I scream back, in fear.

***

When I moved to London, I got a job as a junior editor on a luxury lifestyle website. The site was run by a flamboyant man from Croydon named Carlos, with coiffed salt and pepper hair. Never one to pass up an opportunity to show off, Carlos liked to introduce me to visiting VIPs as our New Yorker who speaks fluent Mandarin and went to Harvard.

None of these things was true. I grew up in a small town in Texas: Amarillo. For some reason, Carlos didnt think this as impressive as being from New York (despite Amarillo being the helium capital of the world and the home of Tony Christies sweet Marie). As for fluent in Mandarin, my dad is Chinese, but I speak only broken Mandarin after living and working in Beijing for a few years. I didnt go to Harvard I was rejected but I did go to a university an hour away. None of these things made sense to Carlos, so he went with his own version.

My exchanges with Carlos were stilted. Our interactions ended in awkward silences. He was twice my age and we had nothing in common. But he was well known in London media circles and I was desperate to get him on side.

After Beijing, I assumed it would be a breeze to assimilate in a country where I no longer faced a language barrier. In China, I had spent a good amount of time miming my interactions. I also had to get used to Beijing locals asking me how much money I made, or telling me I was looking fatter than usual. But it was a bluntness I came to embrace: at least I knew where I stood.

Not so in London. The city was so rife with passive aggression that I didnt know when people were being rude or kind. A woman thanked me on the train for moving my bag and I was almost certain what she was really saying was too fucking right. A man squeezed by me on the escalator and the pitch of his seemingly polite May I? was so snide, it nearly brought me to tears. Carlos asked me if I want to do something for him at work and I wasnt sure if it was an order, a helpful suggestion or sarcasm. The words themselves were unfailingly polite, but it was all in the tone. Other Americans I knew suffered the same way. I genuinely dont know if my colleagues are making fun of me or being nice, a friend from Chicago confessed one night over drinks.

London can be a tough city for newcomers to crack. Compared with the US, people prefer to keep to themselves, especially in public. Im shy, so this was wonderful at first. No one approaches you to chat. I once fell in a crowded street in broad daylight and began the, Im fine, Im fine, honestly protest. But no one had stopped. I lay on the ground, impressed with peoples dedication to not getting involved with strangers. I began to think that I might never find a way to break through the famous British reserve. Would I ever find common ground with Carlos? If only there was some magic key.

And then one day, I witnessed a man bite another man on live TV. This happened during a football match that was on in a pub I happened to be in. I was immediately intrigued: by the biting, the drama, the getting caught, the primal emotion of the incident. I didnt realise it at the time, but this was it: my in.

On a bus, I sat with a couple of friends who were discussing live scores; soon, the entire upper deck had joined the conversation. It was like a portal to another dimension in which everyone was chatty, friendly and open on public transport.

Football was everywhere, it turned out. Once I noticed this, I began to absorb football facts, though only certain things stuck. I loved it when footballers cried. Maybe it was the persistent myth of the stiff upper lip but seeing a player moved to tears, to me, showed he cared more than anyone else. It wasnt like watching an actor pretend to tear up. This shit was real.

I loved any sort of drama on and off the pitch. Family tensions, love problems, scandals, shoving matches; before long, I became a reliable source of useless, soap opera-esque information about players.

I also became a fervent Sunderland supporter. Why would a Chinese girl from Texas living in Highbury, north London, become a Sunderland supporter? Because I had married one. Ian, born and bred in Sunderland, talked about his teams players as if they were his family. That made them my family, too. I knew their names, their shirt numbers, their vital stats, their romantic histories. I was also a natural fit for Sunderland because I love an underdog and by God, I had chosen the underdog of underdogs. The big clubs, with their expensive superstars, were boring to me. Our wins were rare, but they were so much sweeter for it.

I watched televised matches, sometimes without Ian if he was busy or out of town, something that had my friends and family baffled. During visits home to Texas, Ian and I zealously woke early to catch the Sunderland game. My father would observe me, puzzled. My mother, who is Jewish, was also bewildered but said, Well, you were the most athletic of our family of klutzes. It was my childhood best friend Jori who called me out. We were in a Waffle House diner surrounded by grassy plains. I asked Ian if he knew how Sunderlands relegation rivals had fared in their six-pointer, when she interrupted me. Are you talking about British soccer? Who are you? I told her the truth: Im just a girl, standing in front of the TV, hoping a footballer scores a winning goal in the last minute of a high-stakes match and then weeps about it.

A young fan lets rip as Sunderland take on Man United. Photograph: Getty

Do you know who really liked football? Carlos. We soon developed a rapport. Every Monday, hed rush to my desk and wed discuss the weekends matches. He was obsessed with playing style, formations and league tables. Meanwhile, I was the expert on the fights, the crying and the hissy fits. Suddenly, we were friends. He wasnt just my scary boss who got annoyed that I didnt know who Lynyrd Skynyrd were. We were bonding.

They say that to assimilate in a foreign country, you have to speak the language, and now I finally did. Did I make friends from learning about football? I would go out on a limb and say that yes, I did. I made friends with Dave at the Three store when I sat there for two hours after accidentally flushing my phone down the toilet. I bonded with a Ghanaian driver as we discussed a former Sunderland player from his country. In a hotel in the Lake District, there was a communication breakdown with a concierge that ended happily when we both agreed that Diego Costa was a jerk and Jermain Defoe a great goal scorer. When cab rides were too silent, no problem. Lets talk about the match, driver.

***

Dinner in the north-east of England is different from dinner in Texas. Here the food is cooked well-done, the weather is colder and greyer, the company more polite, the table quieter.

Ians dad, brother and uncles are lifelong Sunderland season ticket holders. Ask them a question about what they want to eat, or their favourite movie, or their preference for boxers or briefs, and they will reply, Im easy. Suggest that Jack Rodwell is a decent footballer and they are unleashed animated, passionate, opinionated. I enjoy bantering with Ians brother and dad about football, but we argue a lot mostly because there is one thing I havent been able to wrap my head around since my first game.

After that first Boxing Day match, on the walk from the Stadium of Light to the car with Ian, his dad, his uncle and his brother, I ask the question thats on my mind.

Why do we yell mean things at our own players?

Silence. And then: They just didnt show up. For most of the match, they were bloody awful, Ian says. Good use of we, though, he adds.

But shouldnt we be supporting them? Encouraging them?

Ian shakes his head and sighs.

You know, like being positive and lifting them up? I was still trying to make sense of why 46,000 people would call themselves supporters when they gave the most vitriolic, abusive commentary on their own players. Their support was downright terrifying.

This was your first match, Jess. Weve suffered years of pain while watching players go through the motions. Ive been enduring this for 25 years, Ian says. Twenty-six years, Ians older brother says. His dad: Try 60 years. And finally, I understand the British subtext: You are a wide-eyed idiot.

You got me into this: Jess with her husband, Ian. Photograph: Pal Hansen for the Guardian

At my high school in Texas, there was a club called Senior Spirits. Senior Spirit members met to boost the egos of our sports teams and rally other students to support those teams. To quote from the yearbook, their mission was to make posters and give our school spirit. In the photo, a group of 20 girls wearing matching T-shirts and ponytails, grin at the camera, 100% heartfelt.

These werent cheerleaders. And they werent affiliated with the Steppers, the ultra-serious dancers who performed at pep rallies, the hour-long ceremonies dedicated to whipping up school spirit. Nor were they the student marching band that played during football matches to help stoke, yes, even more team spirit. Team spirit was like an elusive ghost permeating the school and we all had to worship it.

That spirit was partial to posters with marker pen and glitter, to ponytails, to cakes shaped like American footballs and prayers before the big game. It revelled in exclamation marks. It did not like folded arms and booing and sarcasm. It did not like being called a useless twat.

Apparently team spirit isnt a thing in north-east England. So how do English secondary schools pump up their sports teams? I imagine the halls of these schools are lined with posters of a different sort: You better not screw this up, Jones! and Dont do any of that long-ball shit, Gibbons.

I still struggle with this complete inversion, but it unlocked something core in the English mentality how ingrained the cynicism is, as well as the tendency to proceed from a position of cautious defeat. Expect to lose so it hurts less when it happens, and if we win, no harm done.

Diehard football fans remain sceptical of me. At matches, I ask questions. I get looks when I yell cheerful encouragement. I cant stop shouting, At least you tried! every time a player takes a shot but fails to score. Some have the gall to question my passion for football until I do well at the pub quiz football round. If you love something, does it matter if you love it for all the wrong reasons? Apparently, to them, yes. But one thing was for sure: I was emotionally committed.

In May 2016, at the end of that years season, Sunderland were on the brink of doom, as we are every year. Hundreds of fans gathered at the Old Red Lion in Angel, north London, for one of the last matches of the season. I am 5ft 2in, so I left Ian and his friends and waded through Mackems to get to a good vantage point to watch the match. We were playing Everton, and this would seal everything: would we stay up and relegate bitter rivals Newcastle in the process?

Awaydays at the Drayton Park pub in north London, before taking on Arsenal at the Emirates. Photograph: Pal Hansen for the Guardian

The first time we scored, someones pint of beer, spilt in jubilant joy and shock, doused my head. On the second goal, the shouts were deafening. On the third, a man threw his arms around me and together we jumped up and down and screamed with pure joy. I left the pub dazed, half-deaf, hair soaked in booze and my face aching from smiling.

I became a UK citizen last year. At a city town hall, I swore my allegiance to the Queen and stumbled through the national anthem with 17 other newly minted UK citizens. But that moment didnt come close to the buoyant feeling of pure joy and belonging I felt in the arms of a stranger as we celebrated the victory of our beloved team. If the root of football passion is said to be a sense of family and place, then this Chinese Jewish Texan has found her new home.

Unfortunately, that home is sometimes a den of pain and despair. By the time you read this, we will have played three Championship matches in the new season. Ian assures me we will not have won one: Sunderland havent won a league game in August or September for four years in a row.

In April this year, we were finally relegated from the Premier League with four matches left to play.

Useless losers! I yell at the players as Sunderland fail to score even one goal. Its all over. Nothing to hope for now, no Match Of The Day to look forward to.

As I shout at the players, Ian pats me hard on the back. Well done, he says. I look at him, confused. Now you know what it feels like to hate your own team.

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Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/17/i-know-their-vital-stats-their-romantic-histories-how-sunderland-afc-saved-me/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/09/17/i-know-their-vital-stats-their-romantic-histories-how-sunderland-afc-saved-me/