#i have a laptop and a bluetooth keyboard i could use with my phone or tablet

[smaller-comfort]

🛠What tools/programs/apps do you use to write?

🤯 What's a genre you struggle with as a writer (ex. romance, action, etc.)?

Google docs, and sometimes my notes app, but that's mostly for writing out comments on other people's fic. I do all my writing on my phone because I enjoy suffering; as a result, my phone keyboarding skills have grown astronomically over the past 6 months.

Lately I'd say I struggle with lighthearted fluff/comedy; I'm too attached to characters who take themselves too seriously. And action/plot heavy stories have always intimidated me- I don't think I'm great at sequences of events in general. (I realize that pretty much all writing could be considered 'sequences of events'. I still say if it isn't a sad character study or porn, I am out of my depth- and I'm in over my head with some of those, too.)

[copperbadge]

Now that I’m home and avoiding work, notes from the Europe trip in terms of travel and...for lack of a better word self-care, but it’s really more like, accessibility centered around being a) anxious and b) over forty. 

-- The ability to do laundry was nice. I’d anticipated it would be helpful but not nearly as helpful as it was. Also having a fridge was super convenient, and having an oven was a nice perk in London and Rome. 

-- I planned to be able to do laundry so I only brought five days’ worth of clothes, and some were ‘disposable’ which was also convenient -- I brought my oldest underwear that I would have thrown out soon anyway, an extremely old pajama shirt, and at least one pair of trousers that was, as it were, on its last legs. That all worked fantastically; when I ran out of room in the suitcase on the last day of the trip I just tossed the trousers, and I’d already thrown out most of the underwear. 

-- I was more self-conscious than anticipated about my language limitations, which led to a lot of avoidance -- not anything I really wanted to do, like museums and the football match, but things I could have done, like eating out or going into shops. It was mostly to do with the look people got on hearing English out of my mouth. So either I need to learn more basic phrases or be more prepared for the look. (To be fair, in Rome I would say mi dispiace, sono American and they’d immediately be cool.) 

-- My stash of granola/protein bars was clutch, and going to a grocery store for staples was also very helpful. Turns out wherever you go, even if they don’t have Diet Coke, they almost always have babybel cheese.

-- No day trips between cities. Going from London to Cambridge and back for the day was great; going from London to Amsterdam to Paris in a single day was not. If I’m going somewhere new and not going back somewhere familiar at end of day, I need to get there, sleep, have a full day there, and leave either that evening or the following morning at minimum.

-- Relatedly: I don’t have to do this thing anymore where I book early departures or late arrivals because they’re cheap and don’t use up my vacation time. They only make me anxious. From now on even if it ‘wastes’ a day, I only book travel that departs and arrives during daylight hours. It’s always fine, nothing bad happens, but the anxiety is Too Much.  

-- The tablet and bluetooth keyboard in lieu of a laptop worked well. It wasn’t much lighter or more compact, but I was less worried about theft and because it charged via USB I didn’t have to wrangle an extra cord, I could just unplug my phone and plug the tablet in. That configuration also fit in my very small bag where a laptop wouldn’t, so I could carry it in my bag while in transit and not have to get my luggage out of the rack. 

-- The Very Small Bag (a map case) worked fine but while I didn’t need a bigger one I could have used one with more pockets. I was always losing the exact thing I needed in the jumble at the bottom of the bag. I think for longer trips I prefer a small messenger bag that has both a reasonable main cargo compartment but also pockets for stuff like passport and spare battery. 

Overall, a lot of the stuff I’d planned went off well, so at this point it’s less about logistics -- what to pack, how to pack it -- than it is about arranging things to lower anxiety and make transitions easier. That kind of thing sometimes you just need to experience in order to know how to handle it, so that’s fine. Next time I won’t be angry about Amsterdam when it’s not Amsterdam’s fault, or stuck waiting for a bus late at night at Rome Termini.  

[claudiadpdl]

laptop fucking broke about two weeks ago, no one gave a fuck even tho im the one who's expected to pay the bills and take care of every other internet/online task and responsibility. wanted to get a bluetooth keyboard for my phone so i could at least use it until i could miraculously somehow afford a replacement laptop, but that money (plus extra) now has to go to my sister's credit card bill because she's almost in the red after having put down 2.5k for our new car after my dad totaled our old one.

nevermind the fact that he has thousands of dollars that he received as compensation for the totaled vehicle (that he only got because i jumped through fucking hoops with the insurance and settlement people since he bitched and moaned and complained about having to do it himself) that he refuses to share because it's his for his "pain and suffering". but, oh! he was practically jumping at the opportunity to give 5k to his irresponsible brother who only ever talks to my dad when he needs something. and there is so much more i could say but at this point even thinking about it makes me feel absolutely awful

[mobilephonetechnology]

(2024-07-14 image ©nexdoc.com) The question is can you replace your laptop with your smart phone. Celso Bulgatti from CNET tried this for one week and was pleasantly suprised.

I have an Samsung Galaxy S22 Ultra phone, not the latest, that has installed the Samsung DEX software. To set up my smartphone as a laptop I need plug the phone into a suitable monitor with a USB-C to HDMI wire. Then the phone recognises a monitor is attached and the DEX software displays the phone screen on the monitor, full width landscape mode. All the applications are there. To make life easier I connected a bluetooth mouth and keyboard,

Click Chrome and I have access to the Internet as on a laptop. I can also use word, excel and indeed any of the regular office apps. It does take some getting used to, and picking the tasks (usually basic office tasks) makes the smartphone more useful.

But this is NOT a laptop. It is more a docking station which I would need set up at home, in the office, at other work places. Then all I need to do is to move my smartphone. It works great but is not a replacement for a laptop. But it does mean I could travel light.

[the-wip-project]

The WIP project - setup

Hello writerly friends!

I loved reading your answers to the question in the last post, and if you haven’t done it yet, use this post as a reminder to do it. List three things you love about your WIP.

For today, I’m thinking about where I write and how I write. That’s actually a thing I’ve been at for a few weeks now. I write on my laptop when I’m at home on my couch, usually using google docs. But when I’m on the go, I have a bluetooth keyboard for my phone and write with that. It works great! But I want to get away from google docs, so I’ve been trying out browser based writing apps (because I really don’t want to install yet another app on my phone, if your stuff works in browser, just let it work that way, for fuck’s sake).

I’ve been trying out https://novelpad.co/, https://noveleasy.com/, https://writer.bighugelabs.com/, side-eyed the https://fictionary.co/ editor and I haven’t quite made up my mind yet. Lately I even went back to LibreOffice and to carrying my laptop around (it’s not exactly slim and light, though). 

In all that testing and bug-hunting, I was wondering what the ideal writing setup is. Not just software-wise, but also living-wise. 

If space and money did not limit you, what would be your ideal writing environment and setup?

Mine would be a cabin in a garden with a porch for sunny days and a wood-stove inside for colder days. Sounds of nature all around me, a light laptop to write on, maybe a sound system to play instrumental music. 

After you made your own list, think what you could change about your current writing setup, to get a bit closer to your dream setup. 

Like, I can’t have a cabin in a garden, but I can buy nose-cancelling headphones on sale and play rain sounds on those. And, maybe, schlepping around the laptop isn’t too bad, at least then I have all I ever need with me.

Let me hear your ideas!

--

@quilleth, @theoriginalladya, @kmlaney, @coffeewritesfiction, @mareebrittenford, @lilliebellfanfics, @keyboardandquill, @fontainebleau22, @kinetic-elaboration, @wildswrites, @rhikasa, @inkvulture, @heroofshield, @bad-at-names-and-faces, @sabels-small-sphere, @annaofthenorthernlights, @sarahawke

[baladric]

i find it genuinely depressing that i’ve tried out two new laptops at this point (my 2013 macbook makes a lot of extreme helicopter noises and i would like to avoid being stuck w/o a laptop when it inevitably shuffles off this mortal coil) and both times, i’ve returned to my old boy—entirely bc the fuckin craftsmanship of both of those newer computers was just abysmal. like. butterfly keyboards, oh my god??? and with how lightweight they are, i feel like i could break them in half—meanwhile, i’ve dropped this titanium monstrosity at least 15 times over the years, and he’s still truckin.

idk like. i really detest living in a time where the quality of functional objects has been so thoroughly thrown out the window. researched game pads so i could beat that one chase sequence of stray (which i ended up knocking out with keyboard+mouse after remapping a couple things) and just. the general consensus of every game pad cheaper than $150 being that the sticks drift and break within a month, all bluetooth connectivity lags, and all d-pads feel awful and stick, and just... why can we not just make things that work. why can’t we make things that feel good to use bc they’re not made of plastic, plastic and more plastic. even my switch is kind of appalling, like i still have my og gameboy and that thing is beat all to hell but it still works as well as the day i got it—meanwhile i’ve had to replace my joycons twice because of analogue drift and button latency, and none of it feels good. where is the respect for fuckin tactility. i want buttons, i want weight, i want loving craftsmanship and no planned obsolesence and a phone that doesn’t shatter the first time i drop it. this is such an annoying thing to be up in arms about, but honestly the symptoms of the collapse we’re living through are getting to me.

[dragonpressgraphics]

honestly my bag needs change according to my daily tasks.

the phone/wallet/keys/chapstick/fidgetspinner are always in my pockets so i don't ever have to worry about leaving something crucial behind or unattended.

the bag i take to work everyday is a small shoulder bag, perfectly book sized so it sometimes has one of those. sometimes a reading book, sometimes a small notebook. always a pen, my bluetooth folding keyboard for my phone and ibuprofin. if i'm not going to work and i use that bag, i add a phone charger (i have 2. 1 for home, 1 that stays at work)

if i'm going to a friends for the day i'll bring a bigger bag, transfer the stuff from the smaller bag, add bottles of water, and whatever project i'm currently working on and the supplies i need for it (and that could be drawing or knitting - my usual style of projects).

there are also occasions (Gone catsitting or a weekend trip) when i use my backpack instead, because it can carry my laptop and laptop accessories, as well as everything else INCLUDING art supplies, possibly board games or video game equipment, nail clippers, plug adapters, allergy meds, headache med variations.

Oh, and if it's winter, I've probably added the fingerless, elbow length mittens i made for myself. this could be added to any bag.

I also stash spare glasses (re: older prescriptions) inside my car door and at work.

the thing is, the bags are for the extra stuff i might like to have. my pockets have to have the stuff i can't lose because i'm very forgetful. I literally pat myself down before i leave the house (i have literally forgotten my dinner because that was something extra to carry) and i stash anything that could BECOME crucial (like the ibuprofin and the backup glasses and chargers) in multiple recurring locations so i don't have to worry about forgetting them.

@ people who carry bags everywhere what do you put in them what is there to bring other than chapstick, keys, phone and maybe a tampon why are you packing a suitcase to be outside for 5 hours

[kikipops117]

Book reports, anyone?

(I've gotta give some loopooong context first so skip this block of text if you wanna get to the action of my words or if you dont want your opinion of me to sour cuz im gonna be brutally honest and not mince words about what drove me to this point :.)

Because of my crusade to spend less time on the internet, I read more books in 2024 than I have cumulatively in years. And it altered my brain chemistry. In a good way. Maybe "healed" is a better word for it.

I know I am not alone in the camp of people who got out of high school and suddenly became starved for the drive to read. Devouring books as if I needed them to breathe was a hallmark of my childhood, and it was scary how easily I just fell into quitting and didn't even notice it. As a kid, I would finish a book and felt as if I'd lost a limb until I found another story to jump into. But I stepped out of my childhood bliss and into grown-up care, and it's like one day I woke up and didn't need to breathe anymore. I became an adult without holding on to what used to be a load-bearing facet of my life. Sure, I'd occasionally re-read the classics (LOTR and Hunger Games mostly), but I didn't pick up anything new, and I didn't want to. All the while, my screen time crept higher and higher.

The only thing that opened my eyes to what was, by all evidence, a phone addiction, was the sudden realization that I could no longer be content inside my head. I needed overstimulatuon to feel at ease. I needed tiktok on in the background while I ate, worked, exercised. I started writing again, and when I instinctually reached for my phone and told myself no, I got irritable and fussy like a smoker being cut off from their nicotine. I would watch movies on my phone and during slow moments I would literally swipe up on habit, trying to get a hit of dopamine from something shocking and fast, only to realize what I'd done and feel all kinds of shame and embarrassment. Something needed to change.

In 2023 I decided to try to read more. It went okay, I was able to finish 2 or 3 books, but I didn't cut off my internet addiction. I was living alone in a house with no wifi. My only connection to the internet, my friends, news, was social media. My screen time got worse and worse as I packed my reading ajd writing so tightly between my scrolling sessions that I had little time for anything else, and my brain was asphyxiating.

In 2024, Akane and I moved into a house together, and because she needs internet to function, we got wifi. A first for me in almost 4 years. Up until that point, all of my writing had to be done on my smartphone. I had a little Bluetooth keyboard I'd hook up to it, and I literally wrote two rough drafts for novels purely on my phone. So to be able to write from the comfort of my laptop with my phone on silent across the room felt liberating. As if I'd written the prior two novels under the oppressive thumb of an abusive overseer who so graciously allowed me just enough free time to think for myself so long as I paid my dues by scrolling for hours on end once I was put of steam. I was so codependent on short-form content and staring at my phone. My cell was like my only lifeline to my faraway friends (during the pandemic I was forced to move somewhere remote and at least 300 miles in any direction from any friends). It was also my only key to my greatest passion, which is writing. I couldn't just turn away from it! That would be like asking a fish never to breathe water again, but leaving him in the tank to tread with his gills above water.

Encouraged by my newfound freedom from my phone, I decided this year to do something drastic. I had a tiktok page (not the one you will find under my name now, btw,) that was like my video journal to all the hoopla that goes on in my life. I had a few thousand followers and a few million likes and views. It was doing really well and it was on the up. I decided to delete it. (I'm ashamed to admit that it was only this past month that I found the courage to remove Instagram from my phone as well once I found myself sneaking back into reels in order to get to short-form content. I'd kept Instagram because I told myself that I needed to keep up with the lives of my friends. Then I realized that I already spoke every day to my closest circle via text and I was kidding myself if i thought I needed insta to stay close to them.)

With the section of my brain usually devoted to processing endless tiktoks suddenly freed up, I found myself pondering a new writing project. This was unlike anything I'd worked on before, and it was the first concept I'd had in years that sparked such intense excitement and passion. I began writing and found the process easier than ever. But as I went, I became acutely aware that I had ZERO comp-titles for this project that I wished to someday query. (For those who don't know, a comp title is a preexisting book or work that is comparable to your project. When you are looking for an agent or publisher for your book they want you to give them a list of comp titles so they know what your target audience is going to be and how best to market it.)

I didn't have any comp titles because I hadn't read anything in years. And years. How could I dream so much about entering the space of authors when I'd neglected that world for so long? That would be like Ariel wishing to walk on land all of her life but never exploring ship wreckage or breaking the surface to talk to Skuttle.

Additionally, I found myself writing in a way that felt repetitive. Why did everything sound the same? Why was I leaning on a handful of descriptors and metaphors? Because I couldn't remember how books were supposed to feel. I believe it was Stephen King who said that the best advice he can give to authors is to read? Well, I knew then that I needed to read.

But I felt intimidated.

I'm not into "spicy" reading, and the only exposure I'd had to the literary space for the past several years was what I occasionally brushed up against online on Booktok. It was hard not to feel like the entire culture around reading had turned into fairy porn while I was away, lol. Which is not bad! But that's not what I want to write about or read. So I was uncertain where I should start. I can't exactly remember what I did, but I an pretty sure I Google something stupid like "best fiction novels of the past 5 years" and decided to start there. I got my hands on Project Hail Mary, Tress of the Emerald Sea, and This Woven Kingdom.

People often use an analogy to express how easy it should be to pick up where you started on a hobby. "It's like riding a bike! You just don't forget!" Well, I've never related to that stupid analogy because it took me forever to learn how to ride a bike, me being an anxious amd clumsy kid, and after I finally figured it out when I was eight, two weeks later I shattered five bones in my foot while tripping over a dog and had to spend the summer in a hard foot cast. By the time I was finally free, I'd completely forgotten how to ride a bike and had to start the whole scary and traumatizing process all over again.

That's kinda how I felt this past year. In a fit of binging, I tore through Project Hail Mary and Tress, and went on to Yumi and The Nightmare Painter and it was so stinking hard! Even though I was obsessed with the story, I still had to put it down for long periods of time and it took me a while to finish it. It wasn't until this past summer when my sister came to visit and suggested I read, of all books, Twilight, that something finally clicked into place.

Okay. I know what you're thinking. Please don't judge. Hear me out.

I've never read Twilight. My sister was obsessed with them when we were girls but I was into other things. But the movies were a regular occurrence in my house and I went with my sister and mom to see all of the movies in theaters (except for Breaking Dawn part 1. I didn't see that one, so when I went with them to see part 2 I was MAD confused the whole time lol)

When my sister came to visit this summer, she wanted to do a Twilight movie marathon and I was all in. The movies remind me of simpler times, and we had a ball watching and laughing as adults with fully developed frontal lobes and a soft spot for nostalgia.

When she left, she told me I needed to read the books so we could better commiserate and I finally folded. I hopped on Thriftbooks (not a sponsor but I ADORE thriftbooks and would love for them to hmu someday lol) and I was able to get all 4 books for like, $20 with one of the sales they put on.

I read the first book and wow. I will withhold my opinion on it for now (you'll understand why later). I didn't want to jump right into the second book, I needed a pallet cleanser. But I was really loving the nostalgic feeling I got from Twilight. It kept me reading so avidly because the story was not intimidating and there was a sense of comfort and familiarity mixed with the newness. So I decided to pursue that line of thinking and read something that would give me the same feeling.

ENTER THE HALO BOOKS.

If you've found my trashy side blog, then you know by now how obsessed I am with the halo video games (CE, 2, 3, ODST, Reach, and Red vs Blue specifically). My sister read a few of the books when we were kids but I never did. I have dyslexia, and it was REALLY bad for me when I was little. It took me until 5th grade to start reading for fun, and I decided as a kid that I didn't want to deal with all of the science stuff in the Halo books when I could be reading about drsgons and wizards and junk.

So I'd never read the books despite my adoration of the games, and the series felt like it would be the perfect mix of nostalgia and intrigue to get me into it.

I was not anticipating the sorrows™️

I read the Fall of Reach and was devastated, of course. But I was obsessed and had to keep going. So I read The Flood next. Also heart wrenching. I needed a break from all the sadness and read New Moon (twilight 2) and once again, mixed with so much nostalgia and frustration with the characters lol.

This brings us up to the present day.

In search of something that wouldn't be so heavy as the Halo books and so infuriating as the Twilight books, I decided to read Interview with the Vampire this past week, with zero context about the content or tone of the book. I chose it simply because I love vampires and the book I'm writing is about a vampire and when researching the best works of fiction about vampires, Anne Rice's works are in the top list of contenders.

I cracked open my Thriftbooks copy of IWTV on Wednesday, and I finished it late last night. I couldn't put it down. I. Am. Obsessed. The prose. The story. The way that it made me uncomfortable at times, the way it totally should, and made me just swoon with how stinking pretty the writing is. I love the introspection, the exploration of morals and purpose. I am going to digress here because the purpose of this blog post is not to review IWTV but suffice it to say, I loved.

I finished reading late last night and felt the feverish need to share my feelings with SOMEONE. obviously I'm a little late in the game for this book though. It came out in the 70s. But I couldn't shake the feeling that I needed to put my thoughts on what I'm reading somewhere. I am an avid journaler, but I give her a play by play as I'm reading. The eloquence of IWTV felt almost like I was reading a book for a literature or philosophy class, it was so gorgeous and explored such themes. So naturally, my train of thought arrived at the conclusion that I needed to write a book report.

That is why I wrote this long blog post. Because I am here to tell you that I am going to start writing little baby book reports on what I read! Because I want to!

So, if you're interested to know what I'm reading these days and how i feel about it, then you're gonna be fed because I'm cooking. I have found more lasting dopamine and joy in reading books this past year than I ever did scrolling or posting on tiktok. I've felt a stronger connection with my sister, mom, and friends as we talk and gush about what I've been reading. I finish a reading session, and I feel like my mind is invigorated, not numb. I'm inspired to imagine and think and create, as opposed to the bitter addiction that scrolling trapped me in that kepy me hungry to consume. Never ending. I can chronical my entertainment with narrative start and finishe, which satisfies and inspired in a way that hours and hours online can never replicate.

If you're looking for a sign to do as I've done, then please consider this it. And consider me an ally along the way, because it was hard. But so so rewarding.

That's all! :) thanks for reading

[ishouldreallybeelsewhere]

okay they’re gonna have to reset my computer and software issues aren’t under warranty and the guy can’t even find the problem so fuck it i’m fixing my computer myself.

solution number one: purchase an external WAN thingy to bypass the issue and hopefully be able to move on without actually repairing the problem

solution number two: do a hard reset myself. it can’t be that hard and if it doesn’t work then i’ll know the tech ppl were wrong

solution number three: somehow come across 16 hundred dollars and replace my computer with one that has an intel core (kinda what i want to do but so incredibly impractical and stupid)

i do not want to reset this computer setting it up was such a pain and i can’t see how there would be any issue with my windows key because the only problem was wifi

and i’m so used to working with tech that’s a bit broken it probably won’t bother me much. half the usb ports on my last computer just didn’t work, i didn’t have a headphone jack on my 2013 macbook for a year or so and its bluetooth didn’t work, the laptop i’m using now struggles with having more than one tab open at once (i usually have around 60), i’ve used all my available space on the school computers and adobe stops responding every time i save, the volume buttons on my phone only work sometimes, and even my harddrive just refuses to get ejected sometimes… my cd player can’t read cds anymore, the tone knobs on my guitar don’t work, and the lead for my amp is broken as well as the gain and the reverb knob, pretty much nothing i own works the way it’s supposed to but you learn to deal with it i guess…

also i’m on my fourth computer of my highschool era :/ (technically my second atm since the fourth is uh broken so i’ve returned to number 2)

computer no.1 was my dad’s old macbook that we got for free from his work, which was great thru years 9, 10, and 11, until one day jt just stopped. apparently the motherboard failed and it would cost around $500 to get it replaced, but i was getting an ipad for christmas like the next month so we just left it.

it turns out, ipads are fucking garbage if your school almost exclusively uses google docs and i had a bit of a breakdown in the middle of the year because of lots of reasons, so my parents got me the cheapest computer available.

computer no.2 was a lenovo. it sucked so much and could only really run chrome, but i needed adobe for design work, as well as video games n whatnot, so for a time i had a two computer system made up of my school computer, for school, and my mum’s old work dell that we got for free. it was old, and slow, but it had heaps of memory and i could game, use adobe, and it had a massive screen and keyboard, but the battery only lasted a few hours and i wasn’t supposed to take it to school cuz it was too heavy (that didn’t stop me)

so that’s computer no.3 and it was great. i used it for everything, including learning how to code and make video games which i really need for uni. like it is essential for university that i am able to access unity and unreal engine, and much of my social life was on minecraft so gaming was also pretty important. during the summer holidays, i got bored, as one does, and got out my macbook which according to the guy at the shop was 100% dead and would never work again unless we paid $500. anyway i charged it and it turned on sooo fuck that guy i guess. it was about 9 years old at this point but it ran the sims really well and i used to prefer the macbook keyboard so it was fine. the battery life was, umm, not long, but it worked which was cool.

pretty much as soon as my macbook started working again, my dell started going haywire. several hundred dollars worth of repairs later, nothing had changed, and i was screwed. my macbook was awesome, but also ancient, and had 7gb of storage, and the programs i needed were a touch more than that…

so when there was no hope left for my dell, i made a deal with my parents. as a graduation gift/christmas present/you’ll need this for uni for my brother, my parents got him a gaming computer. as such, i was to receive a gaming computer later that year (so this christmas) for uni. so my parents agreed to get me my christmas present early because i needed a good computer for school (i bargain a lot with presents, like my old thing was ‘if i get a job these holidays i’ll pay you back’, a new phone because the screen literally fell out of mine was a christmas/birthday combo (my brother’s new phone was just a christmas present tho) so this was not unexpected for either party) it took many months to actually get my hands on a new computer for long complicated reasons, and during that time, my mac shut down again.

however! at long last! i got a gaming computer! it’s an asus tuf gaming thingamajig and it was awesome! until the gpu went into extreme power saving mode and i had to quickly learn what a device manager was and also how to install drives and whatnot… i got the hang of it and for a few months, things were smooth sailing

then, mere weeks before my mock exams began, at a time when deadlines were drawing near and a good computer became essential, it stopped working… it no longer connected to the internet… and, it has left me with the predicament above…

my mac works again, though the battery lasts about a minute, but i’m back to the lenovo, which i am extremely grateful to have and while it’s a shit computer i did finish writing my book on it and it has served me very well… i’m incredibly lucky to get to access a computer at all, let alone be able to replace them, but also i think i’m fucking cursed

like yeah 2/4 of these computers were literally decommissioned and given to us for free, but the amount of shit that goes wrong with my tech is ridiculous!!

when my brother got his gaming computer nearly 4 years ago, he left it open outside in the rain!!! it got soaked!! AND IT WAS LITERALLY FINE!!! i have the newer version of his computer, and i dare to use it for its intended purpose and it craps out on me!??!?

the computer i’m using now literally doesn’t have a functioning cooling fan!! i don’t know if the fan is broken or if it just doesn’t have one but it never turns on

anyway i think i might be cursed… like newt

[prettylittlelyres]

Hi buddy! Its Athena, I'm sending this out to all my mutuals - what got you into writing, what inspires you, who inspires you and what music inspires you to write? what do you love about writing?

Thank you so much for asking! I'm finally getting around to answering now, but I've had these questions in my head ever since they arrived in my inbox. I knew this was going to be a long post, so I've put it off until there's been a good time, which is today.

What got you into writing?

I learned to read when I was three, and we've always had a house full of books. Most of my collection is digital now, as I've moved house (internationally) too many times in the last ten years to keep a bedroom full of paperbacks, but books have been a huge part of my life.

It's hard to say what exactly got me into writing, because I don't really remember not writing... but I think my biggest inspirations have been Hilary McKay (author of the "Casson Family" books, and my namesake), Anna Godbersen (I love the "Luxe" series!), and the "My Story" series that Scholastic released (various authors, but I think Alison Prince and Valerie Wilding are my favourites!) in the early 2000s.

We had some Creative Writing lessons in primary school, with a teacher who then discouraged us from writing creatively (sheer peculiarity of that person), so I took up writing defiantly, and got good at hiding paper up my sleeve, in my pockets, in my socks, anywhere I could be sure it wouldn't be found. At one point, I was carrying around probably 5,000 words at a time! My friends used to help me break into the teacher's desk to get my confiscated work back, and I'm still so grateful to them for doing that.

Through secondary school, I kept writing for fun, and wrote several drafts of what has become "This Still Happens" during my GCSEs and A' Levels. I was lucky enough to take Creative Writing A2 with AQA before the government shut the course down, and I still use the techniques I learned from those extremely kind, encouraging teachers.

What inspires you to write?

My creativity always seems to kick in when I'm on the train. Whenever I travel, I take my phone with me, and if it's likely to be a long (more than 15 minutes, in my book) journey, I take along my Bluetooth keyboard as well. I bought it when I was seventeen, when I had some "treat" money leftover from my summer job, and I started taking it with me to Sixth Form that September. It was so much easier, not to have to lug my laptop around.

This was 2016, I think: the glorious days of LitLift, which was a bit like Scrivener, but web-browser based, and fizzled out in 2018, after about six months of patchy service. Luckily, I never kept anything exclusively on LitLift, so I didn't lose anything. There was one chapter of "This Still Happens" (in an earlier version) that I had to rewrite entirely, because LitLift lost it before I could back it up, but that was at least half my own fault, for not saving as I went! (No harm done in the long term, anyway. I completely rewrote the book the following year!)

Having my Bluetooth keyboard feels like a good compromise between a desktop/laptop computer and a typewriter. I can set my phone up at a distance, and make the font big enough to see from the other side of the room, and bang out a few pages of my story without much temptation to edit while I draft! As I say, it's so portable, and makes writing so much easier. I used to take it to work and write in the kitchen during my lunchbreaks, but, now that I work from home, I'm just as likely to use my laptop.

There is something very inspiring about graveyards, and I want to write a story set in one - in the vein of Brookwood or Highgate - one day. They're not spooky for me, just extremely beautiful and peaceful. And, of course, I take a lot of inspiration from real life. "This Still Happens" is inspired by my own experiences - not exactly mirrored in the book - and "Curls of Smoke" has a lot of roots in the time I spent in my local Gang Show. I wish I could dance like Florian and Rhiann can (though I'm content to wiggle in my swivel-chair)!

Who inspires you to write?

"Violins and Violets" character Katharina Schmidt is inspired by Maria Anna Mozart, older sister of Wolfgang Amadeus (who inspired Hans Schmidt). I learned about her when I was twelve, studying for my Grade 4 piano; "Allegro in F" from the "Nannerl Notenbuch" was on the syllabus, and I was immediately intrigued. For one, I just like the name Nannerl (how do you get that from Maria Anna? (not that my family's nicknames make any sense to outsiders)). Then, when I looked her up, I found out that she was probably just as good a composer as Wolfgang, but forbidden to make music because she was a woman?! What did the world lose when it shunned her? That's the question "Violins and Violets" asks, and tries to answer... and more to the point, "What might have been?"

"Vogeltje" as a whole novel was inspired by one conversation I had with a friend in a coffee shop one afternoon in 2017. We're both Disabled, in very similar ways, and we've always been frustrated by the prevailing idea that being Disabled makes us in some way tragic, or less deserving of the spotlight. So, I decided, I would write a novel where the main character was Disabled (in the same ways as we are!) and she does get the spotlight, and she does get to be the lead, and she does get to be sexy and attractive and have agency. I love drafting it - it's been on hold for ages now and I want to get back to it - because every time I do, I get to know Marianne Stafford a little bit better, and it's like I have yet another friend I can relate to.

What music inspires you to write?

I have lots of playlists for my writing, usually inspired by a character or a pairing, but sometimes serving as a soundtrack for the whole book.

I like to save pieces of Baroque music that remind me of "Violins and Violets", especially if they remind me of something the characters would compose, and for "This Still Happens", I have a playlist of all the songs I was listening to when I wrote it.

Over about seven long drafts, it's a long playlist, with music from when I was still at school! M83's "Midnight City" features heavily, and appears in the soundtrack for "Curls of Smoke" as well.

What do you love about writing?

The best bit has to be getting to decide what happens next. So little of life is in our control, but when we write stories, we have absolute say. We can make things happen just for fun, because we think it would be nise, or because, yes, it would be horrible if XYZ happened, but we can rewirte it and change it later on, if we want.

I'm a big fan of the 1999 film and 2016 series "Frequency" for the same reason; the characters get to decide what happens in their lives (but I don't like the consequences they suffer, so I'd rather be a writer than a "Frequency" character!).

[buckevantommy]

in primary school (age 10-ish) i remember touch screen technology being the coolest sci-fi thing that was in the near future and i couldn't wait. They soon came out with ipods - which were cool, but not touch screen. In high school folks had indestructible nokia bricks, flip phones, and those keyboard slide phones that looked like mini gaming consoles. i remember the first generation iphone and the first touchscreen ipod around the same time I remember the new (last?) Harry Potter book coming out and lunchtime was weirdly quiet because everyone had their noses in the book wanting to finally read the story but also wanting to finish first. i remember bringing high school assignments into school on floppy disks - we're talking mid 2000s - because usb drives were quite new and too expensive. not many people had touch phones by the time i finished high school but if they did you knew their families were rich. only rich families and tech-loving people had ipads. laptops were still expensive and not something every student had, again just the rich folk and computer science kids. i remember going for walks wearing a certain hoodie/cardigan with a pocket big enough to hold my CD Walkman. i remember walking to my local video rental store - Blockbuster or Video Ezy or that independant place that had the coolest vibes - years before i could drive to rent part 1 of a tv series, season 1 part 1 with the first 4 of 12 episodes in one dvd case. i remember not being allowed to rent ma15+ or r18 movies. i remember having to do battle around the tv at certain times bc different family members wanted to watch different things and we only had one tv - a staticky, bulbous thing, not a flat screen and not a smart tv bc they didn't exist yet - bc there were no streaming services in australia yet - ipads still weren't really an affordable thing yet so people watched dvd movies on desktop computers and laptops and portable dvd players and dvd players plugged into these non-smart tvs. 

i remember finding the workarounds to burn dvds. i remember whittling down playlists to fit music onto burned blank cds. i remember refusing to pay $2.99 for a song on itunes and instead browsing the sales at the local Sanity or JBHIFI store for certain artists compilation albums and unfolding the poster art to pin to my wall or read through the lyrics booklet. i remember the old printers that were slower but didn't rely on wifi and bluetooth and they always worked. i remember the cosmic screech of dial-up noise on the landline phone - yeah the one attached to the wall and with a curly cord connecting the reciever - if someone was using the internet. i remember MySpace and its customisation long before Facebook took on and eventually became the untraversable hellscape it is today. i remember Youtube before the ads. i remember the early days of social media and as everything got good for a while before they all started emulating the censorship shitstain that is Tiktok. i remember playing snake on my Nokia brick and the ringtones made via button tones.

i remember roadtrips of gazing out the window long before parents gave an ipad to each kid in the back seat. i remember bringing physical books on roadtrips and long train trips bc smartphones and ipads didn't exist or, again, were only for the rich families. i remember LayBy being a very grown up thing for people with credit cards (re:parents) long before Afterpay existed. i remember using cash to pay for everything including bus fare when i forgot my paper school pass that lived in that little wallet with the plastic window. i remember using a payphone to call friends and home because i ran out of texting credit. i remember waiting to be picked up from an after school sport of weekend game by a parent with a previously agreed upon time and place bc i didn't have a mobile phone. i remember pocket-sized digital cameras and memory cards. i remember when GoPro became a thing. i remember going somewhere new for the first time and not knowing much about it bc Googling It wasn't always possible - we got our information from stories and visitor brochures bc few places had websites let alone social media pages and you couldn’t look them up online if you were on the road. 

i remember yearning for the near future where personal tech became real and then accessible; but personal tech has brought problems along with its entertainment value and multi-tool features. i remember feeling lonely and broken as a kid and a teenager bc i didn’t have access to online communities; but online is still no replacement for irl social interaction. i remember wishing there was more media for my interests and relatability; and now i’m flooded with choice in numerous streaming services that promote bingeing (fast! now! consume!) while mistreating creators and hoarde content to hoarde gold. i remember wondering how other people lived their lives day-to-day bc i was curious and bc i needed hope that i wasn’t alone but also that it could get better; now social media is raising generations of young people with neurosis to share every day of their lives and training all generations to consume content in fast-paced bite-size pieces as we doomscroll and numb ourselves to irl experiences. 

i remember all of this and i’m 30 fucking 3 years young. 

[vminity21]

+1 | kth

Pairing: HighschoolCrush!Taehyung X StillProcessingIt!Reader

Word Count: 4.3k

Genre: angst/fluff/smut

Warning(s): slight language use, angst (if you read b/w the lines), pretty much smutty kissing, hand groping, mention of alcohol, breast worship, nipple play; Rated: 18+

Summary: When a crush you had in high school unexpectedly returns to your life six years later, this is the experience you have with him when you collected the courage to invite him over to hangout.

Credit to: @suhdays​ for the amazing cover!

Inspiration comes in the form of little expectancy especially when life seems to throw a curveball you never dreamed would be a potential possibility; but, here you are, tapping upon the keyboard of your five-year-old laptop decorated in stickers of celebs you've admired over the years mingled with relevant quotes that have bustled yet again- inspiration that motivates you day by day to continue to be the human being that you are. Inspiration though can appear in lyrical melodies broadcasted globally for millions to pine over; or, published in numerous pages creating imaginary worlds where ones can escape to; or, sketched in a meticulous design to build whatever idea had been desired to come to life; or, filmed in scenes of an edited story by talented persons determined to enter the spotlight in any way they can; or, painted along a canvas in colors of calculated detail bringing forth the picture of accomplishment. Inspiration derives from a mere moment- one that sparks the instinct to gather the materials needed to pour out your heart in ways that may bring a sense of peace.

For you, it used to be in the lines of a song penciled into a crinkled notebook from your backpack hidden away for no one to discover; it used to be countless childhood journals where you expressed your inward battles in order to find enough solace to sleep at night. You've lost your touch over the years because life changes in the blink of an eye, as you grow older, and work can distract from the time taken to focus on yourself; thankfully graduating college to gain the degree you now behold landed you a job, one you hope lasts for many years, and you are currently living in a two-bedroom apartment with your best friend, Monica, who's presently slumbering as you brush some loose strands of hair from your vision.

Your dog is curled at the end of your bed as you write, which is something that you haven't done in what feels like forever, but the reasoning behind this sporadic urge ignited when the familiar pair of brown eyes from six years prior, re-entered your world without your preparation and his presence from a recent night shared seems to echo in every space of your brain to where you've finally had enough. It's about time to reach out, the devil on your shoulder whispers, but the angel sitting on the opposite begs to differ. Shaking your head, you pause momentarily, cracking your knuckles before resting your forehead on the desk, exhaling slowly while the memory of his touch seems to haunt your skin.

He was someone you once admired in high school- roaming the hallways where girls giggled giddily each time he'd pass by; star of the basketball team, rising popularity to the point everyone knew his name, collecting homework answers from budding friendships, and it all began once he started his junior year at a new school- the school where you attended. But the difference that set him apart from the typical cliché's of the prevalent students you never seemed to relate to, was that he talked to absolutely everybody and anybody- no judgment on what group the person took part in, his kindness won the hearts of many other than the evident attraction of his physical features. He didn't care who you were or what you were into, he would be your friend, and that, considering he was viewed on a higher level, made him even more special.

Despite never admitting it then, you had a crush on him. He was more of an acquaintance, but you enjoyed his company when he came around, and when a past friend, who is now married with a few kids, used to have a crush on the same person, your heart sank, because with every guy thinking she was hot, you felt as though you would never stand a chance. Especially not with this guy who made your hands jittery and the beat in your chest skip- the guy who is none other than Kim Taehyung.

Taehyung would frequent the chorus room at times when you and your past friend would practice music pieces and he always was fond of your singing voice- something he praised you for often, while his attention was received from his talent regarding sports. Something he was so good at that it was spread that he may have gained quite the scholarship for college if he decided to go. There were memories of bravery where you seized the day just to steal a conversation and a hug; at one time, scribbling the words 'hot af' with an arrow pointing where he signed your friend, Min Yoongi's, yearbook; Yoongi playing it off as though he had no idea who the culprit was when Taehyung asked who wrote it. Utter surprise can't even fathom when you along with Taehyung were voted 'Most Likely to be Famous' by your graduating class when senior year was conquered. The inside joke was for you to hold the basketball while he placed his hands upon the keys of a piano, the picture you still couldn't process happened, but always remained grateful for.

Six years flew by and the conversation never necessarily held, but there were the rare messages from social media where he'd reach out hoping all had been well with you. Interestingly enough, a cover you posted harmonizing with a fellow singer happened to be his absolute favorite, one of the few Instagram posts he'd commented on, and one of the few singing videos he continuously would listen to repeatedly without your knowledge until a few weeks ago when he revealed that to you. A cover that is now near to be a four-year-old video that he still finds uplifting when he hears you and the way your voice blended so well with the other female. Your mind is reeling because after all this time, and even now, there are remains of the aftershock, trying to forget the feel of him, when there's no way you can, not with everything so fresh on your mind. So fresh on your heart.

It all occurred when Yoongi, who kept in touch with you occasionally after graduation brought you up to Taehyung who happened to think of you earlier when listening to his favorite cover of yours, and he agreed he'd like to hang out. He asked if his friend, Hoseok could join you, Monica, and Yoongi which of course you said yes to learn how sweet you found it, that he had traveled within the span of a day after visiting his grandparents, because he is a man of his word, planned to come see you even though the drive was five hours out of his way. The night was filled with so much laughter mixed with serious conversations to the point the card game that was supposed to be played was never finished, and it sprung the desire of wanting to see Taehyung again, and you couldn't come to terms with never knowing so after some encouragement from Monnie and Yoongi, you messaged T to hang out a few days later, but never opened his reply until you were safely home from work.

Taehyung: Gotcha! Hmmm, I haven't decided on what I intend on doing. Either being with family or hanging out with friends. If I don't hang out with family, you could be my plus 1 or bring whomever or vice versa

[Y/N]: Sorry I just got home from work! I'll definitely be your plus 1 if hanging with family doesn't work out! Sounds like a plan!

He asked if you wanted anything from the store when it was confirmed he was on his way which you responded with your typical answer of no, and with music playing from your Bluetooth speaker, you were highly humiliated when you lost track of four minutes of time, opening a message from him to see that he had been there, at your door. Heart racing you rushed to unlock it, head spinning when you saw he leaned against the stair railing with a plastic bag of two Arbor Mist wine bottles dangling from his hand, him promising everything was fine despite your profuse apologies- him slipping his phone in his back pocket while he followed you into your home.

Monnie happened to be staying the night with her family, so it would be just the two of you tonight, besides your dog who bounced at his legs while he reached down to pet her fluffy head. Taking in the sight of him, now that was something you found hard to believe. Just a simple pair of jeans, a gray t-shirt with a black jacket complementing the dark tendrils of hair spread across his forehead leading to the carefully sculpted lining of his jaw nearly brought you to your knees, but you held it together long enough to settle across from him at your dining room table. He had taken off his shoes at the door remembering upon a few days prior, and he set out the wine while you jumped to retrieve wine glasses (Yoongi happened to purchase for you) while banter still related to greetings.

One thing that truly intrigued you when first seeing Taehyung after six years were words, he had said that touched your heart more than you'd like to profess. "That's why I try to enjoy every moment with people because you never know what day will be your last," and you knew right then, that if there was anyone you wanted to share a moment with, it was him, and there he was, right before you, smiling about something you said while the sound of the fruity liquid-filled each glass.

"I really truly do not understand what you are so afraid of. What do you even have to lose?" Monnie tinkered with the lens to her camera while she sauntered through the living room. Exasperated from anxiety, you sucked in your lips before teasingly throwing her the side-eye.

"My dignity,"

"Oh c'mon," she paused, lifting a brow. You had been talking nonstop on how bad you wanted to invite Taehyung over, but fear of rejection including the fear of humiliation seemed to overwhelm you, although deep down you knew your best friend in the entire world was correct. You did not nor do you have anything to lose.

"Well!" You squawked, raising your palms dramatically in the air before slapping them to the sides of your thighs, "Why the hell would Kim Taehyung ever want to hang out with me anyway? Do you not see how farfetched this all is?"

"Bold of you to assume that my life isn't already farfetched enough as it is-"

"Not! The point!"

Monnie sighed, and when she saw the way your shoulders slumped in disappointment that shouldn't have been an issue, to begin with, she stepped closer, placing her hand on your shoulder, "First off, you are overthinking this, and you shouldn't. Besides, I think after hanging out as a group, he only sees you as a friend, meaning no expectations. So, go into it with that mindset okay? I'm sure he'd love to hang out with you. Secondly," she smiled, her serene expression filled with promises she always kept, "You've waited six years for this. I think you should ask him to hang out."

"You really think so?" Your grin reached your hopeful eyes, and the feeling in your chest seemed to react more positively despite your earlier turmoil.

"Yeah. The dude owes us a chair anyways,"

"Ah!" You cackled, back pressed against the dining room table as you remembered literally a few days ago when Taehyung accidentally broke a spindle of the chair in half with his foot when Yoongi scared him just by suddenly walking down the hallway. "I don't think I've ever seen a man so embarrassed."

"I'm not saying to hold it over his head, but," Monnie held up her index finger, "I think that gives him enough reason to come back," she giggled, setting her camera on the dining room table before waltzing into the kitchen.

You shrugged, "At least we can still sit on it."

"Look at it, it's staring at me," Taehyung pointed swiftly at where the vacant spindle would have been, your laughter reverberated throughout the space.

"T, really, you do not owe us new chairs. I promise, it's fine," you reassured him, realizing your cheeks were sore from how much you'd been smiling since he entered your 'realm of refuge' as you liked to describe your apartment. He snapped a picture of it, probably with the intention of getting a new chair for you and Monica regardless, and you found that appreciative although you would be happy if he didn't.

Shit. You pause from the computer screen, leaning back into your chair before folding your arms tight across your chest. Eyeballing the cursor, your vision narrows as it blinks, waiting for you to add more words to the memory that seems to spin in a cycle with the subtle goal of not stopping. Or, so you figure. If recalling every little detail isn't already hard enough, reliving the reminiscence of his fingers twirling in your hair, his sweet laugh when he looked at you, or the way he held you so tight-

But, everything in between, leading up to those mesmerizing flashes are just as important to you as what it led to. Maybe it was the conversation- the three hours of conversation before the move to the sofa which it was hard to fully focus on what else was being said because how could you properly concentrate when the one person, you'd been so worried about spending time with was seriously conversing with you like the pair of you had been friends your whole lives?

Miraculously, you were able to gather the stories of past vacations that resulted in mild disappointment revolving around the complaints of people surrounding him, or the goal of visiting as many places as possible leading Taehyung to scribble down a list of where he'd been to reveal you both have equally been to the same amount of places. Of course, the thrill of going on a mini adventure with him brought an excitement you haven't felt in a while; even the story of why he was transferred to your high school years ago due to a misunderstanding, and when the pair of you made your way to the couch, he nestled into one corner while you gladly took the other, wishing you could snuggle closer but fear prevented you from doing so.

It seemed as though that he didn't want to watch the movie anyhow, because he talked to you as though he never wanted to stop, and eventually it led to you asking one too many times if he was okay with spending the rest of the night with you. "It's up to you, I'll stay if you want me too," he promised, the way your heart fluttered when you replied, "Yes, can you please stay? I don't want you to go."

"Alright, alright! I'll stay," he smiled widely, both of his large hands reaching out, and there was not one ounce of hesitation from you- your hands grasped his before your dog jumped to beg for attention, trying to lick at his face causing your hands to undo. Laughter was contagious with Taehyung, and still cuddled into the corner of the couch, you were so elated that he was going to stay, you reached to hug him, his arms wrapping around you, the feel of your bodies aligning putting the biggest smile on your face. It was crazy how everything was seeming to fall into place- the stars aligning as though it was all magic; and, you couldn't get past how right everything felt. How right he felt. Pulling away, his smile never left him, "Are you shy?" His arm remained draped around your shoulders, and timidly you peer at his surprised gape, his black hair almost covered his crescent eyes.

"I mean... Yeah, I can be," you murmured, reaching to hug him again, but something washed over you this time, a thought that had crossed your mind repeatedly that you just couldn't take it anymore. The side of his face was blurred, placing your palm upon his cheek, and without even a moment of doubt, you kissed him. A sudden decision, but one of the best ones you could have made.

His lips were so soft, the way his mouth just seemed to mold with yours for only a few mere seconds, and the shock on his face when you pulled away, paired with the realization that his hands were held in the air, you hadn't expected his reaction. Shit! You cursed inwardly, immediately jumping back to persistently make sure he was okay; even when he moved to cuddle with you, him claiming everything was fine, but that he couldn't believe you kissed him being the both of you never once saw this coming especially six years ago during the high school days. His hand was fidgety as he swiftly rubbed your shoulder, your head buried on his chest while your mind spun in a continuous loop of how you could not believe that you kissed Taehyung. The Kim Taehyung.

He became quiet- too quiet, concern etched in your expression, maneuvering yourself back to the opposite corner of the couch, so you could face him. "T, are you sure you're okay? Did I freak you out?"

"No, no, I just can't believe you kissed me," he was in awe, eyes dazed as he ran his slim fingers through his hair, "Like, really I never saw this coming,"

"I mean, have you looked in the mirror?" You teased, knowing damn well he'd been aware of you finding him attractive, and he shook his head in dismissal of your compliment as he chuckled; it took you a whole sixty seconds to realize you were holding his hand, fingers linked, and him asking if you were nervous due to your clammy palm, though you tried to swear up and down you were not, the next round of words he said nearly brought you to tears when he finally spoke.

"You shouldn't sell yourself short," he looked you in the eyes without any faltering, although you tilted your head in mild confusion as to why he was saying this, to begin with, "I don't think you realize how much of an impact you've made on others, especially guys," ah, he was letting you down easy, and you knew it, but you're too stunned to speak as you listened, "I don't think you give yourself enough credit either. You're a great singer, you're pretty much a musician, you love animals, you have a job, you live on your own. Really, you shouldn't sell yourself short-"

"T," you breathed, pleading almost, but trying not to make it obvious, but he never broke eye contact, "We don't have to date or anything, I just- I just wanted a moment with you." You mentioned what inspired you to spend time with him- exposing how a few nights ago when he said he wanted to enjoy every moment with people- you knew you wanted to have a moment with him, too. Memories from high school were spoken momentarily, thirty minutes passing by which included a made-up handshake as well as the subtle twirl of his fingers in your hair- him complimenting how good your hair looked which made you blush even more.

Just when you thought he wasn't already smooth enough, you noticed Taehyung started teasing your dog, her pouncing at his chest before he'd lean in closer to you. Eyebrows scrunching, it took you a hot second to realize what he was doing. Each time Taehyung would scoot closer to you, he'd kiss you, sending the pair of you in boisterous laughter when your dog would try to break the kisses by jumping in between your faces. The more your lips would touch, it'd last a bit longer and longer, your hand clinging to the side of his jacket to pull him closer when things really started moving fast, eventually your dog left the room with the hint that attention was no longer available for her.

Still lip-locked, Taheyung's hands gripped your hips while you willingly moved to straddle him, arms resting on the top of the couch on either side of his head, the tip of your tongue glided along his, while he fanned his hands along your ass. You refrained from moaning into his kiss despite how bad you wanted to, yet you held yourself together, involuntarily grinding your clothed heat where his erection was felt. T smacked your ass before slithering the tips of his fingers to your shirt, slowly unbuttoning one by one.... One by one. His eyes were hazed from how much he was craving your mouth, and with a seductive nod in his direction, he continued until he made it to the final goal, your kisses never planning to stop, the sides of your shirt being brushed away for him to take in the sight of you.

"Ooh my God," his eyes darkened in evident lust when he saw the way your black bra cupped your breasts, "Oh my God," his voice deepened, him hardly knowing what to do with himself while your smirk remained subtlety on your mouth. Though you hadn't needed him to ask, he politely waited for your permission to touch your chest, a quick pang of frilly nerves ghosted your stomach.

"Yeah," you breathed seductively, gradually moving to capture his lips, trying to hold back a giggle when he gently moved his hands to your back, "You're not going to find it there," you mused, referring to the clip. He paused as if panicked, "It's in the front," you finally admitted, but failing miserably, Taehyung let you take initiative, you unclipped your bra uncovering what is now widening his brown eyes. "Oh my God!" His reaction made you want to cum right then and there, especially when his fingers made their way to squeeze your nipples when his mouth returned to yours. Taehyung worshiped your breasts, and for some odd, yet arousing reason, you lived for it.

You're uncertain of when the tv was switched off, and even now, as your hands continue to fly across the keyboard, one thing you do recall, one of the lingering memories of the evening was your shirt being off, thrown onto the floor mingled with your bra, and without any warning, Taehyung hoisted you in the air, your legs instinctively wrapped around his torso while he tightened his hold around your body. His steps were painfully careful, kissing you roughly while your arms kept their place behind his neck, and the direction was being taken to your bedroom where your heart pounded so anxiously to be. His jacket was shed before the bold act, and all that was left was his gray t-shirt and jeans. Laying you down with a bounce from your mattress, he remained above you, and your eyes refused to stray especially when he reached to remove his shirt- his smooth skin greeting yours sending waves of goosebumps spreading among your limbs.

There was no one like him in your eyes, and there never would be. Not in your heart. And with how perfect everything was going; you were not prepared for how hard it was going to be to stop before things went too far. Because what if he doesn't exactly feel the same? He was letting you down easy not even an hour ago, and here you were, hopes so high, you weren't sure how you were going to erase them back down. He kissed you until you couldn't breathe, your fingers dug into your comforter, while his palms glided all over your frame for however long you let him, but when he went to remove your leggings, you halted him.

Now, this is where your heart aches when you relive this part, because a conversation was held, one where you mentioned what if someone catches feelings if the both of you decided to solely be just friends with benefits? Taehyung said all you had to do was communicate with him because he was easy to get along with, and you've known this about him for six years. He was always someone easy to talk to, and you knew he would never treat you poorly over a situation like this. And, he hadn't. You made the executive decision to not sleep with him for you wanted him to remember you as the woman you are, and the woman, you've always been, and with the fear of going all the way being something that could change his image of you, you were satisfied to hear the loud echoes of his snoring after you changed into pajamas, gazing at his sleeping demeanor before you drifted into slumber as well.

When the morning came, you were not ready for him to leave, but he asked if you would walk him out, him throwing on his shirt and jacket while you rushed to brush your teeth. T asked if you had any other plans for the rest of the day which you proceeded to answer honestly with a no, as he mentioned that he was going to get breakfast.

"Let me know when you make it home," you said tenderly, "I want to know you're safe,"

"I will," he promised before you embraced him, turning just enough to place a peck to his cheek. It was his smile that decided to enter your recollection- the boxy smile that would plague you until the day you accept that you will never forget it.

And when you opened the door to the apartment where he gracefully waltzed through, you merely caught a glimpse of him leaving, ahead of you quietly shutting the door to whatever could have been.

Or, what could have started a beautiful story that has yet to unfold.

[fallinnflower]

worth it

hoshi x reader (university!au, strangers to lovers, fluff)

The first time you met Soonyoung was during the co-curricular fair during your first year of college. Soonyoung sat at a fold out table in the quad with three of his friends, music playing from a Bluetooth speaker and a big poster taped to the front of the table which simply read ‘DANCE CLUB,’ surrounded by hand-drawn emoticons. You thought it was a cute booth, and you thought he was a cute boy, but you nearly jumped out of your skin when he called out to get your attention. 

You weren’t sure what clubs you were going to join, but you didn’t think you’d make for a good dancer — you’d only ever danced by yourself in your room, and one time at a school dance. But there was Soonyoung, calling out at ‘the girl in the blue cap,’ which you suddenly realized was you, imploring you to join. You attempted to conceal yourself in your jacket as you shook your head, mumbling an apology and waving as you wove your way deeper into the crowd, cheeks blazing. 

You didn’t look back. 

The next time you interacted with Soonyoung (beyond him smiling at you when you crossed paths, which you figured he did to everyone because he was just that friendly) was in a marketing class the two of you had together. You didn’t sit anywhere near Soonyoung, and for the first quarter of the semester nothing of consequence happened between you two. 

Then there was the midterm assignment. Randomized partners, open-ended topic, all culminating in a twenty-five minute presentation given by the both of you. 

You hated the waiting most of all. Sitting, listening to your professor call out what seemed to be everyone else’s name but your own, biting down on the inside of your cheek the longer you had to wait. 

“Soonyoung and Y/N.” Your head snaps up, and suddenly Soonyoung is waving excitedly at you, motioning to the seat beside him with a big grin. With your heart beating a mile a minute you pack up your things and slip down the row to sit beside Soonyoung. 

“Hi!” He greets. You manage a quiet reply, not sure why you feel so bashful in his bright presence. “Do you have any ideas for the project?” 

“Um, well...” You pause, flipping a few pages back in your notebook. “We could always talk about social media’s impact on marketing… I know it’s simple, but maybe we could pick a specific platform and get some data about how marketing has developed there. Maybe Instagram?” You chance a look at Soonyoung out of the corner of your eye to find him still beaming at you, peering down into your notebook. His face is closer to yours than you expected, and his cheeks are bunched up in such an endearing way that you just want to pinch them. And just like that, as if you weren’t blushing enough as it is, you feel your cheeks heat up tenfold. 

Suddenly, everyone starts packing up, and you close your notebook in a hurried manner,

“So, um, I’m free every afternoon—”

“How about tomorrow then? At 7 in the library?” You nod, caught off guard at how enthusiastic Soonyoung seems to be about this project. He’s never been active in class, and, to be honest, you were expecting him to drag his feet a bit more. 

It’s 7:15, and you can’t keep yourself from biting at your lip, a mix of agitated and concerned that keeps you bouncing your knee as the minutes tick by. You’re close to just sending Soonyoung an email and ditching, but suddenly you catch sight of him jogging frantically between the shelves of books. You stand and wave to catch his attention, and he grins when he notices you, brushing his hair back from his face. 

Upon closer inspection, you realize that his hair is damp, sticking up in a multitude of different directions. 

“Hi, sorry,” he pants, somehow still looking chipper. “I let dance practice run late and I didn’t wanna come here all sweaty. But, I brought snacks to make up for it!” He drops a bag of gummy bears on the table between the two of you, eyes sparkling. You sink back into your seat, averting your gaze as a sense of guilt washes over you.

“The library has a no food policy,” you mumble, and all it takes is a glance to see that Soonyoung’s smile has dropped a bit. 

“Oh.” There’s a pause, and all you can hear is the rhythmic clicking of other students' keyboards, until suddenly there’s a crinkling sound and the bag is once again in your vision. 

“That’s fine, you just take them then! As an apology for me being late.”

When you look up, considering denying his offering, you can’t help but pause. His smile is as gummy as the candy he’s offering, his cheeks looking just as squishy and his eyes glittering with anticipation. You feel your heart skip a beat as you accept, slipping the bag into your backpack. 

“Thanks, Soonyoung,” you whisper, and he laughs. 

“You can call me Hoshi, if you want. All my friends do.” This, too, gives you pause, but you shake it off and return his smile — albeit shyly. 

“Okay, Hoshi.” You turn back to your laptop, missing the way his ears turn red, and pull up the Google Doc and Slideshow you had made for the project. 

“I went ahead and shared the project materials with you, did you get them?” 

It’s then that you realize Hoshi isn’t the best with technology. He looks a little bit like a confused grandfather as he leans in towards his screen, eyebrows furrowed and mouth slightly ajar. 

“Everything okay?” You ask, and he lets out a little whine. 

“It won’t let me type anything.” You tilt your head, equally confused. You had given him editing access, hadn’t you? 

“Let me see.” Hoshi not only turns his laptop to you, but moves to the seat beside you to see what you do. You let out a little laugh as soon as you realize what it is. 

“Ah, you weren’t in editing mode.” You switch his system over, and Hoshi leans back in his seat with an embarrassed pout on his lips. To put it mildly, it’s adorable, and you’re not sure how you’re going to deal with looks like that if he’s always this bad with his laptop. 

Despite that little obstacle, Hoshi is relatively prepared. He’d found a couple of sources that he had to dig around in his bookmarks to get to again, and he seemed genuinely interested in working hard. The two of you laid out the basics of your project, throwing little notes into the doc and talking through your points. 

“I can make some infographics for the project,” you offer. “I can probably have them ready by this weekend.”

“Should we meet up on Sunday then?” He asks. “We can go to a coffee shop! My treat!” 

“Oh, no, you don’t have to—”

“I want to,” he interrupts, dark eyes sincere as one of his hands comes to rest reassuringly over your own. “You’ve been really helpful, and I’m not very good with technology so you’re going to end up doing a lot more than you should have to, so I want to make it up to you.” 

Well, you don’t know how you’re supposed to say no to that when he’s smiling so cutely at you and his hand is on yours — so you don’t. You just nod and agree, before you both pack up your things. Hoshi carries your bag for you until the two of you part ways at the quad, him heading down to the house he rents with a few of his friends and you back to the dorms. 

Later that night, as you’re checking your emails one last time before bed, you’re surprised to find a notification that Hoshi had made a relatively recent change to your Doc. You click to open it and can’t help but giggle at what you find. 

I forgot to give you my number at the library!! (***)-***-***!!! ヽ(´▽`)/

You can’t help but think the emoticon looks just a little bit like him, and you fall asleep with a smile still lingering on your face. Kwon Soonyoung, you think, what a guy. 

Hoshi texts you throughout the week — at first, just to ask questions about various little tech issues and what you think of the sources he’s found; you simply laugh when he asks you what font you like for the slideshow, but your best friend (who’s peeking over your shoulder) has a slightly different reaction. 

“Oh my god,” she says. “He’s just coming up with random shit now!”

“Huh?”

“He’s just finding reasons to text you,” she continues, exasperated. “Like, fonts, seriously? He just wants to talk to you!” You shake your head, texting Hoshi that you don’t have a preference. 

“No, he’s just bad with computers, that’s all. Besides, we barely know each other.” Your friend huffs. 

“You’re oblivious.”

But as time goes by, you can’t really deny that he seems to be texting you about almost nothing. But you also can’t deny that you’re enjoying talking to him, with his excessive emoticons and use of exclamation points. Even when he’s distracting you from class, his messages leave a smile on your face. 

And Hoshi is the King of Distractions. In fact, the next time you have class together, Hoshi repeatedly catches your eyes just to point at his phone to get you to check yours. You wonder how he’s been doing so well in class if he’s always like this, and so you mime back that he should take notes. 

He pouts. It’s unfairly cute. He points at the phone again and you finally give in, rolling your eyes before tapping the screen. 

Hi

You give him the most withering look of disbelief you can manage, and he only beams back at you like it’s the best thing he’s ever done in his life. You roll your eyes, but as you turn away you happen to glance at your phone again just in time to see his message before your screen fades to black. 

:D

Dork, you type back with a smile on your face. He’s just too cute to ignore. When you happen to glance up from your phone again, Hoshi is pouting more prominently than you’ve ever seen before. You try not to think it’s cute, try to keep from smiling, but you just can’t help it. It seems you just can’t help anything when it comes to him, at this rate. 

Sunday comes and you’re less prepared than you’d like to admit. After sleeping through your alarm, you’d barely managed to remember to grab your laptop and charger to show Hoshi the infographics you were meeting to talk about before running out the door with your moisturizer barely slapped on. To say you were self-conscious entering the cafe, slightly winded and with stray hairs falling into your face from where you had it pulled back, would be an understatement. 

You’re quick to find Hoshi, who is staring at you with his lips slightly parted, expression unreadable. The apologies burst from your mouth like a flood, barely pausing for a breath as you explain your morning situation. 

“But don’t worry,” you say, plopping down onto the seat and smiling brightly at him as your laptop boots up. “The infographics are done!” Hoshi stares at you for a moment, that same expression from before still on his face before he shakes his head slightly and replaces it with a familiar smile. 

“I’m sure they’re awesome,” he says, pushing his chair back. “Want anything? My treat.” It takes you a moment to decide on a pastry to go with your coffee, but his smile never once fades — he doesn’t seem even the slightest bit impatient, even as he goes to stand in line. At some point, he turns his head to try and catch your eye, and when he does he scrunches up his nose and smiles; you giggle and do your best to mimic his expression, and when you do he’s quick to turn away, but not before you see his cheeks turning pink. You wonder if he’s feeling alright.

He returns a moment later with both your coffees and two chocolate croissants on a plate. You push your laptop so he can see it and begin operating the mouse with one hand, taking your croissant in the other. 

As is your usual tendency, you fall so far into explaining your work that you forget anything else — which is why you’re shocked to see Hoshi staring so intently at you and not the screen when you finally finish your spiel with a hopeful, “So?” He blinks rapidly, turning a little red again, before nodding enthusiastically at you. 

“They look great!” He chirps, then takes a long drink of his coffee. You sigh in relief and do the same, turning your laptop back to yourself. 

“Um, Y/N?” You hear him ask, and you lift your gaze from your screen.

“Hm?” Hoshi looks very determined, and although you don’t understand why, you realize it’s a very good look on him, one that leaves you feeling flustered.

“You have some chocolate on your face.” You immediately feel yourself turn red, and begin looking to see where the napkins are.

“Where?” 

You feel a light touch on your chin, and Hoshi is suddenly leaning across the table towards you. His eyes are focused intently on your lips and it only makes you more self-conscious; your breath stalls in your chest.

“There,” he intones, his voice low as his thumb gently glides along the corner of your mouth. His gaze flicks up to meet yours, and you feel your heart skip a beat as a smile spreads across his face, “Perfect.” 

Maybe his touch lingers, or maybe you’re just imagining things, but either way Hoshi sits back in his seat and goes back to munching on his croissant with no more than a light laugh, leaving you light-headed. You duck your head slightly, staring at your keyboard as you feel your face continue to burn, and wonder if you might still be asleep and dreaming.

If you are, you consider, you don’t really want to wake up. 

Your best friend hits you with a pillow when you tell her about your café meeting with Hoshi.

“Hey!” You snap, swatting the pillow away from your face. “What was that for?” Your friend lets out a long-suffering groan and falls dramatically back onto your bed.

“I’ve failed you!” She wails, clutching the pillow to her chest. “A hot boy flirts with you and you don’t even notice!”

“I don’t know,” you say, plucking at a loose thread on your blanket. “Maybe it was nothing. It’s Hoshi, be realistic.” At the sudden quietness of your tone your friend lifts her head and fixes you with a glare.

“What exactly are you trying to say, Y/N?” You shift awkwardly beneath her gaze.

“Just… just that Hoshi is kinda out of my league, okay?” You’re not usually the type to think about leagues, but Hoshi has always seemed sort of untouchable to you, a polar opposite. He shines as bright as his nickname would imply and you tend to prefer not being noticed because it makes you anxious. The thought of Hoshi liking you feels a bit like Aphrodite liking Hephaestus, and you just can’t shake that little cloud of self-consciousness away.

“Y/N,” your friend says sternly, sitting up and forcing you to meet her eyes. “There is no reason for Kwon Soonyoung not to like you, and there is no reason you should reject him if you like him, too.” You press your lips into a thin line, frustrated that she’s making sense. Sometimes you really just want to be irrational and take the risk.

And you have a feeling that having your heart broken by Kwon Soonyoung is one hell of a risk to run.

The project goes much more smoothly than you previously expected, especially considering Hoshi’s schedule is as crazy as it is. You know that his club has an event coming up, so you try your best to keep the workload light on his end — not because you think he can’t handle it, but because he definitely seems to be pushing himself to the limit. His normally bright eyes seem duller when you catch him off guard, and the bags under his eyes are significantly heavier than before. Luckily, you’re both almost done with the whole thing after that long session in the cafe. 

That doesn’t stop Hoshi from asking you about it after class one day. You barely notice him bounding up to you until he taps you on your shoulder, his face lit up in that familiar grin. 

“Hey,” he chirps. “When should we meet to finish the project?” You can’t help but smile at him, and you lightly wave it off.

“Oh, don’t worry about it. I can finish it up.” Suddenly, Hoshi stops in his tracks, gently pulling at your sleeve so that you do the same. His face is now set in a pout, which is undeniably cute but you swear you won’t fall for it this time.

“That’s not very fair,” he grumbles. You avert your gaze, nervously playing with some of your hair,

“Well, I mean, it’s just that you’re so busy—”

“And you aren’t?” He interrupts, and you look up at him. 

“I don’t run a club with a showcase coming up,” you argue, and Hoshi huffs, entirely unconvinced. After a moment, however, his expression suddenly shifts to a smile.

“How about this,” he begins. “You come to the showcase, and then afterwards we can finish the project together!” 

“Won’t you be tired?” He shakes his head immediately, the sparkle back in his eyes.

“I’d never be too tired for you.” 

You nod without even thinking, and Hoshi is excitedly bounding off before you can even consider what his words might mean.

After telling your roommate about Hoshi’s ‘compromise,’ she screams at you for a few minutes about how oblivious you are before telling you she’s going to pick out your outfit for the showcase whether you want her to or not. By the time the showcase has actually rolled around, you realize you actually do want her to figure out your outfit because suddenly you feel like you have nothing to wear.

However, she dresses you pretty simply. She shoves you into a cold shoulder style sweater you rarely ever wear and what she knows are your favorite jeans. She points to various shades of eyeshadow and has you apply it and your lip tint yourself, and as you stand in front of the mirror looking basically the same as always, you can’t help but look at her in confusion.

“Are you sure about this?” You ask, and she playfully shoves your shoulder.

“He already likes you, idiot. How you dress doesn’t really matter, I just knew you were gonna overthink it so I chose for you.” You stick your tongue out at her, annoyed at how well she knows you but grateful, nonetheless, that she’s helped you out so much. She even agrees to go to the showcase with you for moral support, since she knows you aren’t really into crowds.

The downside is that she isn’t above elbowing her way through the crowd to make sure you’re directly in front of the stage, where you and Hoshi will have a very clear view of one another. She stands beside you, squished so close that your arms brush together, and as the stage goes dark and the crowd falls silent you find yourself grabbing at her hand out of nervousness. She laughs at your antics but gives your fingers a reassuring squeeze.

A spotlight falls upon the stage, where Hoshi and the other three boys in his unit are lying on the floor in a pile, somehow still managing to look elegant. You bite down hard onto your lip the moment the music starts, and even though Hoshi isn’t the first to move you can’t seem to take your eyes off of him. This is Hoshi, you realize, so much fiercer than the tired, goofy boy you see in class. Someone has done his makeup, the eyeshadow smoked out into a dramatic wing that contrasts his pristine white clothing. 

And then suddenly you realize they’re singing. All four of them, and you swear Soonyoung’s gaze catches yours right as he begins the first chorus and you’re ready to die, you are, holy shit—

Your mind falls completely blank from then on, and you only come to again when the lights fall and the crowd erupts into applause. Your best friend yanks her hand out of your grasp to clap along with them, and you do so as well, blinking rapidly to clear your mind. She gives you a teasing look and you don’t bother to sass her; you don’t have the brain power to say anything at all.

A few more members of the dance club perform, but Hoshi doesn’t come on stage again until the fourth song. This time, he and the three other boys are dressed in all black, and you realize with sudden and extreme force that Soonyoung’s shirt is mesh. You think of all the times you’ve seen him in baggy sweaters and t-shirts, looking comfortable and cozy and overall like a great cuddler — you hadn’t ever considered he would have abs, even though you probably should have given his dancing regimen. You can feel your best friend’s elbow nudging your side, but you’re too laser-focused on Soonyoung to give her even a sliver of your attention. 

You don’t think you’ve ever been mad that a person looks sexy before. First time for everything.

When the performance ends, you’re shocked to find Hoshi’s gaze locked with yours. A shiver runs down your spine at the intensity of his gaze, and although you know you’re blushing you can’t bring yourself to look away until the lights fall once more, plunging you into darkness. You can hardly hear the applause over the thundering of your heart in your ears, and as people begin gathering their belongings and moving to the back of the auditorium space, your best friend takes hold of your arm excitedly.

“Okay, we have to go backstage!” 

That snaps you out of it.

“What? No!” You shake your head wildly, but your best friend merely continues to smile. “Most of the crew has no clue who we are, we can’t just walk backstage—”

“Well we can’t just leave after all that,” she retorts, smirking devilishly. You cover your cheeks with your hands, hoping to quell the raging blush.

“I hate you,” you grumble, squeezing your eyes shut. “Why can’t we just wait here, or—?”

“Y/N!” Your eyes snap open, and you find that your best friend is now gazing past you, towards the doors you know lead backstage. 

“Oh my God,” you breathe, barely audible, but your anxious response goes ignored as your best friend waves to Hoshi excitedly.

“Hey Hoshi! Great job tonight, is Minghao back there still?” She’s standing before he even answers her question, and you’re pretty sure she would’ve walked away regardless of if Minghao was around or not. You curse yourself for forgetting that the two are lab partners. As she walks away, you take a deep, calming breath, and fix a smile to your face. When you turn, Soonyoung is already standing in front of you, dressed in a plain black shirt and sweats with just his familiar smile on his face.

“Hey,” he greets, beaming. You feel your heart skip a beat. 

“Hi.” Why does your voice sound so small? “You did great, but I’m sure you know that already.” He laughs, eyes sparkling in excitement.

“I do, but it’s still nice to hear you say it,” he replies, looking extremely pleased as you feel the blush rising high on your cheeks once again. You find yourself rendered speechless, thinking of the intensity of his eyes when they met yours on stage. Thankfully, he’s the first to break the silence, smiling fondly down at you in your seat.

“I was gonna go for bubble tea. Do you wanna come with? My treat.” Looking up into his bright, smiling eyes, you wonder how you could ever say no.

“Sure, let me just text my roommate and let her know.”

The bubble tea place Hoshi takes you to is only a few minutes’ walk from campus, and the majority of that journey is passed in amicable silence. You keep sneaking glances at Hoshi, although each time you do it makes you flustered and you ought to be avoiding that kind of situation. True to his word, when you get to the shop he pays for both of your orders before you can say a thing. As you leave the shop, preferring to walk back towards campus while the weather is nice, you find yourself breaking the silence,

“If you keep treating me like this, I’ll never be able to repay you.” You look up at him with a pout, but he just responds with his usual good humor, gently nudging you with his elbow.

“Who said anything about repaying me?” He asks. “You deserve to be treated to things, anyways.” You let out a sigh as he sips on his drink, running a hand through your hair.

“But I feel bad. I’ve hardly done anything for you since we met.” Hoshi hums, glancing at you thoughtfully for a moment before replying.

“You could repay me by going on a date with me,” he says, so casually that you nearly choke on a tapioca pearl. Thankfully, you manage to wash it down with a sip of tea, though looking into Soonyoung’s serious, star-filled gaze makes you feel just as breathless as any coughing fit would have. 

“I—” He waits patiently on your response, standing before you on the sidewalk, the gentle breeze ruffling his hair. “Wouldn’t you still be paying, then?” 

For a moment, in the silence that falls after your response, you worry that you’ve ruined it all. And then, true to his nature, he breaks into laughter, running a hand through his hair. As his face tilts slightly towards the streetlight, you realize he’s blushing — just as nervous as you are — and can’t help but smile.

“Ah, that’s a good point,” he says, sighing. He fixes you with a playful grin, “But maybe I should just keep you in debt to me.” You laugh and playfully prod his shoulder, stepping closer to him.

“Or,” you reply, slowly looking up to meet his gaze, hoping your confidence holds. “Maybe, once we ace this project, I could take you on a date.” Somehow, his eyes seem to sparkle even brighter once he hears your response, and the smile that splits across his face is blinding.

“Deal,” he says, softly, gaze falling to your lips. 

As you find the burst of confidence to close the gap between the two of you, you find yourself wondering if you’ll be able to wait until the project is finished to treat Soonyoung to that date. When he smiles against your lips, wrapping his arms around your waist and inadvertently pressing his cup of tea into your side, causing you to shiver and melt further into his embrace, you realize that the answer to that is no. 

And you couldn’t be happier.

[oh-so-scenarios]

ᴛʜᴇ sᴇʀᴇɴᴅɪᴘɪᴛʏ ᴏғ ᴛʜɪɴɢs...♠| 10

⤖ ᴡʜᴏ ʜᴀs ᴛɪᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ sᴏᴜʟᴍᴀᴛᴇs? Jᴜɴɢ Hᴏsᴇᴏᴋ ɪs ᴛᴏᴏ ʙᴜsʏ ʙᴇɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴇᴀᴅ ᴏғ ʜɪs ᴍᴀғɪᴀ ɴᴇᴛᴡᴏʀᴋ. Hᴇ ᴡᴏɴ'ᴛ ʟᴇᴛ ᴛʜᴇ sᴇʀᴇɴᴅɪᴘɪᴛʏ ᴏғ ʜɪs sᴏᴜʟᴍᴀᴛᴇ ᴍᴏᴠᴇ ʜɪᴍ…ʀɪɢʜᴛ?

⤖ Mᴀғɪᴀ Lᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ Hᴏsᴇᴏᴋ x ᴅᴏᴄᴛᴏʀ Fᴇᴍᴀʟᴇ Rᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ, Aɴɢsᴛ, sᴍᴜᴛ, sᴏᴜʟᴍᴀᴛᴇ!ᴀᴜ,

A/N: WARNING: Weapons, Injuries, someone getting seriously injured. Blood. ....I played out this chapter in my head for weeks. This chapter and the next chapter that is coming....I’ve planned this out sooooo much. Outlined it differently a bunch off times. And here we are. 

**Unedited, please ignore any errors!

(Word Count: 7.34K)

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Y/N:

I strolled into the headquarters with Jennie trailing behind me. She had her phone pressed to her ear, her jaw clenched as she struggled to keep her tone light. She was having an argument with Jaehyun. Since I saw her last in the hospital where Hoseok hugged me unexpectedly, there was an argument. 

I didn’t feel that it was business to listen in or ask the specifics. Jennie is talkative if she wanted to tell me, she would. We were supposed to meet with Hoseok to review the previous surgeries and plan for the next ones. Looking at the tears bubbling in Jennie’s eyes, I don’t think she’ll be joining us. 

I walked over to our office, thinking of where I placed all the files that were recorded for the surgeries. My heels clicked as I rushed through the room, my eyes narrowing in on the thick black folder that sat on the counter. I was quick to grab it, flipping through the pages and only looking up as I heard the door being pushed open slowly.

Jennie walks in, showing me a strained smile while stepping to the other side of the room. The phone was still pressed to her ear and she turned her back to me. While my eyes lingered on her back, I noticed something out of the corner of my eyes. I didn’t notice it before, but there were two white jackets. 

I left the folder opened on the counter and moved towards the items I saw. I reached out and grabbed the first jacket, realizing they were a doctor's coat. They were new, and it was notable because the fabric was still a bit stiff. I ran my fingers over the jacket, a smile pulling at the corner. 

I had to bite my lip to suppress the giggle that wanted to leave my lips. Etched onto the jacket in green were the Doc followed by my initials. This had to be the work of Hoseok. The green words were a dead giveaway. 

How cute of him. I walked back over to the folder, closing it and holding it against my chest as I glanced at Jennie who now faced me, the angst slowly melting from her facial expression. I left the room without a word, walking back out to the once empty lobby area. Now I was seeing Seokjin at the large circular table with his laptop open in front of him. He wore a casual outfit, his grey tee matching with the loose grey sweater pants he wore. 

I haven’t really spoken to the guys in the past few days. Since my emotional breakdown in front of everyone, the place was always empty when Jennie and I came in. We only saw Jungkook when he would bring in patients and see them out. I also haven’t asked about the previous conversation or how things unfolded after Jennie and I left. 

“Hey, Y/n,” Jin said, not looking up from his computer screen. His hair was swept over his forehead and the bags under his eyes showed the results of a busy day. I stood there idly for a moment, wanting to ask where Hoseok was. Jungkook dropped us off, and I realized I left my phone in the car. I can’t even text Hoseok.

“Oh!” Jin suddenly exclaims, “Hoseok-ah said to go to his office and wait for him. He’s running late.” 

I was a bit confused, realizing that I’ve never been to Hoseok’s office at the headquarters. I’d have you go down that hallway. My mind didn’t gloss over the casual way he called Hoseok’s name.

“H-his office?” I muttered. Jin looks up at me from under his eyelashes and looks back to his computer before nodding.

“Yup, you can’t miss it. It has double doors.” He continues typing away at the keyboard, giving me a clear sign that the conversation was over. I slowly approached the further left hallway, a place I’ve never ventured. Not that I wasn’t curious but...that hallway is where the guys handle most of their business. I didn’t have any reason to go there. 

I walked slowly, my heels clicking softly, further showing my hesitation. I walked through the narrow hallway, the grey walls making the space more suffocating. I walked past a few doors, all different in color. A red door, a blue door, a green door, a purple door, and a black door. Each of them with a door handle accompanied by a keypad for a code and another circular lock about the keypad. There was a small rectangle on some of the doors. They seemed like glass peep squares, but the lights of each room were switched off.

I walked further down the hallway until I came to a pair of double doors. They were fine wood with a number pad on above the classical doorknob. The doors were slightly open, giving me a peek into the dimly lit room. I pushed the door opened further and stepped in, taking in a deep breath as I realized the room smelt like Hoseok. The room was dimly light and matched the overall feel of the hallway. 

The walls were a combination of a rich rosewood and lighter wood. It made the room feel cozy. The desk and the chairs were dark brown and they wonderfully complemented each other. The whole room just fit together well. I walked further in, setting the folder on the wide desk. 

I could lay on the desk and curl my body slightly. It was pretty large. I walked around the side of it, finally noticing the open MacBook that sat in front of the bigger spinning chair. Hoseok’s chair I’m guessing. I walked around the chair, my eyes drifting to the big bookcase displayed behind Hoseok’s seat. 

There were some interesting novels, making me wonder how often Hoseok reads them. I stopped at the notice of a black Bluetooth speaker sitting among the books. Is Hoseok a big fan of music? He hasn’t mentioned it much. I walked around to the other side of the chair, noticing the laptop again as it pinged and the keyboard began to light up. I looked away from it, reading the titles on the book spines. 

“Where’s Jennie?” Hoseok’s voice said as one of the double doors opened. I jumped at the sound of his voice, becoming used to the quiet that was surrounding me. I turned around to see a white plastic bag in his hand as he walked forward. His eyes were on everything but me, as he set the bags down from across the table.

“How was work?” He questioned softly, glancing down at the folder I set down. I nodded, keeping my eyes on him. 

“Work was good. Same old, same old.” I paused, “I think I’ve really befriended this one patient. She’s so funny that I visit her during my free time. What about you?” 

He shrugs, finally bringing his eyes up to look at me. I notice his eyes fall down my body, taking in the knee-length A-line skirt I wore and the dark green blouse. 

“Work was fine.” He answered simply, his eyes meeting mine again. Goosebumps rose over my skin, a small shiver running up and down my body. Only a heartless person wouldn’t be able to feel the tension and dare I say...chemistry that has been zipping between the two of us. It’s almost...overbearing. 

We’ve only gotten as far as kisses on the cheek and hugs but everything in me wants to be totally wrapped up in him. Emotionally, mentally and physically. I want to hug him, kiss him, and have him spill his heart out to me. 

It feels like my heart is calling out but I can’t be sure if he hears it. We were standing there staring at each other in silence, not sure what to do next. I watched him stretch the back of his neck while looking down at the floor. I took a step forward, walking around the wide table to the side he stood.

He stood next to the guests' chairs, awkwardly looking down at the food he brought. 

“I wasn’t sure if you had dinner.” He said slowly. It took a few short seconds to understand what he was saying. I looked down at the takeout on the table before staring at Hoseok again. 

“No, I haven’t!” I beamed, peering into the plastic bag and taking out the plastic to-go bowls. He brought food for me?

I started setting the food out quietly while he picked up the folder. I watched out of the corner of my eye as he flipped through, nodding in an approving manner. 

“Face the laptop this way.” He ordered, his attention still on the documents. I stretched my arms out, basically bending myself over the table to grab the laptop. I turned it to face us, seeing as we would be sitting beside each other rather than across from each other. 

I pushed it closer to Hoseok before grabbing one of the two guest seats and scooting it closer. I sat down and began eating, humming in joy as I used the plastic spoon to scoop the fried rice. 

Hoseok wordless took the other guest seat beside me and drew it in closer to the desk. 

“Ok, so I’ve decided it’s best to approve and schedule the operations for a month in advance. It saves time and helps things run smoother.” He explained. I nodded, agreeing as I took another spoon of rice. 

I was too focused on eating as Hoseok typed something into the laptop, clicking loudly on the mousepad before turning his attention to me.With my mouth full of rice, I glanced at him and the laptop. It was PDFs of different surgery requests. I quickly chewed my food, leaning forward to read the words on the dimly lit screen, 

We sat there doing this for a while, I would either accept or deny certain requests. Hoseok would sometimes ask why, and I’d give a simple answer. The patient's health isn’t stable enough, or I am not comfortable performing such an operation.

I was reviewing another request only to have my view obscured by Hoseok’s arm, his fair cologne washing over me. My brows furrowed as I watched him scoop a bit of the fried rice with an extra plastic fork he pulled from somewhere. 

I gawked at him as he stared back, putting the spoon of rice into his mouth. A slight chuckle left my lips as he smiled in return. 

“I paid for it,” He jeered, “So I believe I am entitled to a spoon or two.” 

I snickered at him and pushed the bowl of fried rice closer to him, so it was almost in-between us both. 

“Oh!” I perked up, “I saw the doctor’s coats. Thank you Hoseok, they’re cute.” 

He only nodded in acknowledgment, showing me that he was a bit embarrassed by my gratitude.

We worked in comfortable silence for a while, Hoseok trying to keep from laughing every time I grew picky with the operations I would accept. When we finally came to the last request, which I denied, I was reaching for the dumplings that were sitting there forgotten. I pushed the laptop further back, taking the lid off the food.

“They’re cold by now, but I’m sure they’re still good.” After passing the wooden pair of chopsticks to Hoseok and grabbing my own, we started eating as he pulled the laptop closer to him, and began doing some different types of work.

“I’m curious about your investment company,” I said moving to pick another dumpling. 

Hoseok raised an eyebrow but didn’t break his focus from the laptop screen. 

“So you fund different businesses?” 

“Basically. I give funding for a percentage of the company or project.” He answered before grabbing another dumpling. 

“I see, that’s very cool. I’m sure you make a lot of money that way.” 

“It started as a cover for this black market work, not wanting to draw too much attention to the money I have. However, it grew to be very successful and brought in billions of dollars every year, so it became my part-time job.”

“That is very cool.” I narrowed my eyes at him, “For someone who has so much money, I don’t see you showing it off much.” 

Hoseok shakes his head, “I don’t like to draw attention to myself. I spend my money on watches, sometimes suits, while the rest goes back into the business or into my work here.” 

I place an elbow on the desk, and hold my cheek in my hand, making sure to turn my body to face Hoseok.

“When was the last time you went on a vacation?”

He pauses, looking up at the ceiling while he thinks for a moment. 

“My family went on a trip when I was 13 years old.” He answered casually. My eyes widened, staring at the unphased Hoseok. 

“You’ve never taken a break from work?” I sounded so surprised that Hoseok stopped what he was doing to look at me.  I take my elbow off the table and sit upright in my chair.

“My whole life is my work.” He said simply. I shook my head before he could finish the sentence. That’s not good. That’s not good at all. 

“A man who wants for nothing yet doesn’t have anything.” He muttered to himself, a sad smile playing on his lips. 

“Hey!” I snapped at him in a disapproving tone, “You have the guys and you have me! How dare you say you don’t have anything.”  

I reached forward and placed a hand on his knee, surprised to not see his body tense up like it usually does. He just looks back to the laptop with a strained smile while I keep my hand on his knee in a sign of comfort. I try to change the conversation, not really minding that his attention as elsewhere. The closer I get with Hoseok, the easier it gets to read his mannerisms. 

He wears a poker face perfectly but his body language can be read like an open book. He looks ahead and focuses on something when he gets nervous, and I find it cute.

I leaned back in the seat, closing my eyes. I was ready to fall asleep and since Hoseok wasn’t dismissing my presence, I wasn’t going to leave. Being in the room with him was relaxing and comforting. My hand stayed placed on his knee, my thumb aimless rubbing circles.

“The talk with the guys went well?” My voice came out hoarse and drained of energy. Both of our chairs lacked armchairs, making it easy for my body to naturally lean towards Hoseok.

“It was awkward, tense and uncomfortable but things have felt easier since.” He answered simply and I knew he wasn’t going to push it anymore. I hummed in agreement, happy that things were working out for him. 

My head began to fall to the right, near Hoseok. I’d jerk awake, straighten my back and clearing my throat awkwardly. It was when I went through that motion for the 3rd time that I let my head fall onto Hoseok’s shoulder. My body relaxed and I melted into him, ignoring the slight huff of air he released in reaction. 

My eyes closed and my left arm moved to wrap around the front of Hoseok’s waist so I was practically clinging onto him. My face hid in his neck and his scent filled my nose in the same comforting way it always does. 

“How the hell am I supposed to get any work done?” His words held no hostility, and it followed a slight snicker as he continued to type away at his laptop. 

“Hey Hoseok,” I muttered after some long minutes of silence.

He hums in reply, not missing a beat and the sound vibrating through his chest. 

“Your mother…” My voice trailed off and the typing on the laptop stopped as well. The way Hoseok stiffen told me I was poking a sleeping bear.

“Did she pass away?” My voice is soft, not wanting to make any implications. He was silent for so long that I was ready to move away from him, worried that I’d offended him. His chest rose and fell slowly, and while my chest was basically pressed to his side, I could hear the hammering of his heart. 

Was it how close I was to him? My chin only needs to be tilted forward to brush the sensitive skin of his neck. With every word I spoke, my breath brushed his neck.

“She…” He pauses, “I don’t know where she is.” 

“Oh.” My response hung there in the hair, showing that his answer caused only more questions to sit in my brain. 

“My father and my mother were not soulmates. My mother found her soulmate at the peak of my father’s illness.” The atmosphere grows darker and Hoseok’s voice grows colder. He feels very far away at this moment, and though I can’t see his face, I know his expression lacks any emotion. 

“Your mother left you and your father for her soulmate?” I assumed, just to make sure I was understanding everything. I can feel Hoseok nod and a wave of understanding hit me. His mother left her whole family for her soulmate. Ugh, what a bad taste that is leaving in my mouth. So Hoseok lost his mother than lost his father. He was completely alone.

I opened my mouth to speak when Hoseok started again, the next works hitting me like a brick.

“Her soulmate was my father’s doctor….who worked at Seoul Sky hospital.” He says it as monotone as possible.  It was my turn to stiffen, and it seemed Hoseok was holding his breath while waiting for my response. 

Hoseok’s mother left him and his sick father for the doctor that was supposed to be helping his father. Hoseok’s soulmate ends up being me...a doctor at the same hospital that possibly scarred him for life. Young 16-year-old Hoseok, who has probably been carrying this baggage for some time. 

“Wow, life is ironic.” Was all I could get out. My voice comes out choked and Hoseok hisses in a playful manner.

“Don’t start crying.” He whines in a way I’ve never heard before.

“I’m not crying, I just understand why you disliked me so much.” 

“I wouldn’t say I ever disliked you, it’s just the terms in which I met you.” He speaks honestly, “The first few weeks weren’t me being angry at you, I was angry at the universe for sending me a soulmate that reminded me of how people so easily throw everything away for a soulmate. It reminded me too much of what my mother did.”

“I see,” I answered.

“Every time I saw you, it felt like you were taunting me.” 

“Do you still feel that way?” 

“No.” 

“Does that doctor still work at the hospital?” 

“He ran off somewhere with my mom. He doesn’t work there anymore.” 

I tighten my arm around him, “Did you become a chairman at the hospital in case they return? Your mother and her soulmate I mean.” 

“At first...yes. But, I found another reason to stick around so it’s not the only thing keeping me around,.” 

I nodded.

“My mother, before she left my father, told me that staying with a man who has a career like my father was...draining. In the beginning it was all good, love was enough. But it became a burden as life went on.” Hoseok took in a shaky breath, adjusting his body to relax into his seat more. 

“She told me someone in my father’s line of work would be better off alone. If I find my soulmate, I should run the other way for my soulmate’s sake.” My other arm slid behind Hoseok’s back, and my left arm rested on his chest now. 

This feels so natural. Being wrapped up in each other like this, laying here talking and just enjoying each other's company. It all fit together like a puzzle and everything else was an afterthought.

“That’s horrible, I’m so sorry.” 

“She has said worse...but I didn’t blame her. I didn’t blame her for telling me that but I still hold a lot of anger about leaving. I could see my mom wear down over the years. My dad was always coming home late, traveling for days without calling and prepping me to take over.” He sighs.

“That’s probably what she hated the most, the fact that this lifestyle was already being put on me. However, that doesn’t excuse her for leaving. It never will.”

“Of course,” I agree, “It can’t be easy to forgive for something like that.” 

We sit in silence again when another question is uttered from my lips, “So are you just counting down till the day I get tired and leave?” My tone was light but the slight tremor in my voice gives away how sad I am feeling.

When Hoseok doesn’t reply, I have gotten my answer.

“I would say I don’t work the same as my father. I try to do my work as quietly as possible, with as few complications as possible.”

“I can tell.”

“But I’ve kind of figured that you’re not going anywhere any time soon.” 

I smile widely at his words, “You’re damn right I’m not! You can’t get rid of me Hoseok!”

Hoseok feigns disappointment, “Damn it, I was hoping you’d get fed up and leave.” 

I cackle, moving back from him a bit, only for his arm to wrap around me and keep me from moving too far. 

“Oh stop it!” I poke fun at him, “stop with the hard to get games and admit you like me.” I giggle while playfully hitting his chest. He narrows his eyes at me and beams the brightest smile I have ever seen from Hoseok. 

“I like you, Y/n.” 

He was completely serious and I was frozen in my spot. The sudden confession left me completely shocked. My heart zoomed and my brain stopped working for a moment. It was like a brain error. I couldn’t even muster a reply. The smile that shined so brightly leaving me blinded and desensitized.

His smile fades slightly as there is a knock at the door before it opens. 

“Hoseok-ah!” Someone yelps, causing both of us to groan. Ugh, they’re so loud sometimes. I notice the way Hoseok doesn’t move to let go of me as the other 6 guys and Jennie make their way in. 

“Hyung--” Jimin’s voice stops short as he lays his eyes on us. The knowing grin spreads across his lips and he looks towards the others who soon come into view. 

“Hyung! Noona! You guys had food and didn’t share.” Jungkook pouts, looking towards the empty containers.  

“Why are you all in here causing noise?” Hoseok hisses, before closing his eyes to try to find some peace.

“Well, we didn’t mean to interrupt your little cuddle sessions we decided that we should do something for your birthday,” Jennie said.

I perked up, “Birthday?” I gasped, reviewing the date in my head, “Hoseok your birthday is in like 2 weeks!” 

His eyes are still closed as I look around at the others.

“We have to do something!” I exclaim, only making Hoseok groan again. 

“It’ll be something small, I promise!” I pinched his cheek quickly.

~!~

 “Are you sure?” I questioned, thinking I heard Hoseok wrong. Jennie grabbed onto my arm, hopping up and down.

“Let’s go!” She whined, gripping my arm tighter. It’s been about 3 days since I was last at the headquarters, wrapped up in Hoseok’s arms and feeling more comfortable than I’ve ever been. Right now I was standing in front of the guys as they prepared for another small mission. 

They’re head it 8Heart, a club not too far from here, to find this Seok impersonator. It’s a mission, not a party, not a night out. Yet it seems Jennie doesn’t see it that way. We left work earlier than usual and walked in to find the guys in the middle of planning. A bunch of things written on the whiteboard. It seems there are four men going around in a group, using Hoseok’s name to get what they want. 

They rob people and clubs with weapons, so I’d think it would be a dangerous night. It seems that Jennie doesn’t feel that way. She mentioned wanting to go clubbing while all the guys stood at the round table. 

Hoseok shrugged and went on explaining the whiteboard. I wasn’t paying much attention, reading a text from my mother. I need to remember to call her and my father. I haven’t even told them I found my soulmate. Knowing my mother, the moment I tell her, she’ll want to meet Hoseok. I don’t want to scare him off just yet, so I think I’ll avoid bringing up Hoseok.

Jennie suggested that we meet up with the guys at 8Heart for a good time. She said we’ve been working hard and need a night off. I was ready to object when Hoseok causally nods and says, “Okay, see you there.” 

So when I asked him if he was sure, he glanced at me and gave a small smile. My heart hummed at the action. Hoseok has been in such a good mood lately. The way he opened up to me last time we were together was...electrifying. 

I went home and stared up at the ceiling, replaying his small confession in my head over and over again,

“I like you, Y/n.” 

He is full of surprises.

“How fun!” Jennie squeaked, jiggling her car keys in her hand. Jennie decided to buy a car in the last 2 days. It makes me realize the Jennie comes from a different walk of life than I do. She paid for half of the car, and her parents covered the other half.

The 2020 Kia was pure white and its bright headlights made it stand out on the road. When she pulled into the parking lot at work, her gleeful prance was enough to see that she loved the attention.

“We will meet you guys there!” She grabbed my arm and started dragging me towards the door. Hoseok was too focused on what he was saying to notice our exit. We stopped by my place to grab a few of my things and sped over to Jennie’s condo.

I’ve been there a few times and was always blown away by her organizing skills. However, today I didn’t have time to take in her wonder decorating. 

“Get into the shower! I’ll pick out an outfit for you!” She was eager to go out, seeing as that’s not something we could regularly do with our schedules. I  grab one of her extra towels and make my way into the shower, thankfully that we stopped by my place to grab underwear for me. 

 I didn’t want to go to a cameo. I showered while wondering what Hoseok was liking in the clubbing scene. I’ve heard from the guys that Hoseok would go to clubs sometimes, often to find a companion for...one night. 

They reassured me that he doesn’t do such things often. I believed them, Hoseok doesn’t seem like an approachable guy. If I saw him at the club, I’d need liquid courage to even say hello.

But...Hoseok likes me. That handsome unapproachable man is my soulmate. The universe is kind. The universe is also mean. Hoseok opening up to me about his mother and just what she did, makes his animosity towards me in the start a bit understandable. 

What kind of woman can leave her dying husband and her son like that? Finding your soulmate is sweet but throwing away the life you already have for your soulmate? I don’t want to say what she did was okay, but just how strong can a soulmate connection be? 

I shut off the water, grabbing the towel and wrapping it around my body. I rushed out just in time for Jennie to rush in.

“I picked the cutest outfit for you! It’s on my bed!” She hollered before closing the bathroom door. I took a short walk down the hallway to her room. I walked to the big queen size bed, staring at the clothing she laid out. It was something simple and cute. A black t-shirt dress that had some graphic design on it. It was a-round neck but there was a slight V line dip in the middle of the round neck. There were black biker shorts and black knee-high boots. Of course, she picks out something like this for me.

I get dressed swiftly, borrowing her spray-on deodorant and also her lotion for my legs. When Jennie walked in, I was pulling on the biker shorts, standing up to really wiggle into them. They fight tight, but not to the point of discomfort.

The dress tee stopped just above my knees, and with the biker short underneath, I didn’t feel too exposed. I had some cleavage showing but it was tasteful.

 Jennie dressed quickly, while I put on light make up, not wanting to be caked up for such a place. My hair is left down and I sat down on the bed as Jennie got herself together. I held my phone in my hand, scrolling through Instagram and liking random pictures on my feed.

“Did you work out things with Jaehyun?” I asked in a monotone, glancing up at her for a short moment and returning to the pictures on my phone.

“Yeah, we worked it out,” She said while putting her lipstick on. She wore a red lace top, with black torn jeans and low bumps. She had her hair in that iconic low ponytail of her. I watched her put on her cherry red lipstick, striking a pose in her full body mirror on the other side of the room.

“Damn, we’re sexy.” She says before looking at me and blowing a kiss my way. I giggled at her, slipping the knee-high black boots on. Thankfully the heels of the boots were thick and square. They also weren’t too high, making it easier for me to walk. I tied the thin laces at the top of the boots to keep them tight around my legs. 

I grabbed some stud earrings that sat on Jennie’s dresser. I slid on the leather jacket and watched as Jennie zipped around her room, making sure she had everything. 

“You got your wallet?” She questioned. 

“It’s in your glove compartment,” I answered, heading out her bedroom.

“Wow Y/n, you look fine as hell. Hoseok is gonna lose it when he sees you.” She followed behind me, her keys jiggling as she walked. I smiled and looked over at her from over my shoulder. 

“You think?” 

She nods, “You two have been very close lately, I’m happy to see that.” I beamed as we walked through her living room and towards her front door. 

“I never told you but, he confessed that he liked me.” Jennie stops walking for a bit, her mouth falling into an O shape. 

I stopped with my hand on the doorknob. I turned to look at her and smiled widely. All I could do is nod as she stared in surprise. 

“Really?” 

“Yeah!” I exclaimed.

“That’s amazing! Wow, no wonder you two were all cuddle up. What a cute little work date.” She gestures towards the door and I open it, stepping out into the condo complex hallway.

“It wasn’t a date.” 

“Of course it was. You guys did some work, ate food and ended up cuddled together. So a date.” She nearly sang as she locked her door and turned to face me. 

“You both are such good matches. The universe doesn’t make mistakes, so no matter how different you and Hoseok seem, you still go together so well.” 

We both stroll down the hallway to the elevator. 

“Just like you and Jaehyun?” I say softly. 

She sighs as I press the button for the elevator, “Fights are a natural thing for couples to go through. Even though he grew up so different from me and we have different views on this. But damn, everything seems to work perfectly.”

“The universe doesn’t make mistakes,” I repeat her words as the elevator doors slide open.

The club was a bit further away than we intended but we ended up parking across the street from the place. The music was booming and vibrating the whole street. There was a thick line outside, and I groaned at the thought of standing for that long. The building said 8Heart in pink letters with purple and green lights shining all about. 

After parking the car, we stepped out, ignoring the few whistles from other men who were walking about the parking lot. My eyes scanned over the line of people, already eying us as we approached. Their aces weren’t friendly. The wait must have been long because they look fed up. 

As we got to the sidewalk, ready to go to the end of the line, a hand was on my wrist. I whipped around, ready to fight when I noticed Taehyung smiling widely at me.

“Hey!” I yelled. The music was already so loud from outside, “We thought we’d get here before you guys.” 

Taehyung leaned in close, putting his mouth near my ear, “We got dressed and left soon after you did. Hyung is already inside.” Taehyung keeps a hold on my wrist and I hold Jennie’s hand with my free hand. The bouncer lets us right in, getting a wave of anger from those waiting in line. The music was booming, and the bass who see deep, it felt like my heart was vibrating.

There were bodies moving and dances to all different beats of the song that played. We walked through the big dance area to a lounge looking area. There were a few bit areas with circular sofas and tables in the middle. Taehyung let go of my wrist once we were past the dancing floor. My eyes followed him, rather than walking after him. 

Jennie let go of my hand and walked past me, following Taehyung. My eyes moved ahead of Taehyung to find the area the guys were sitting in. I noticed Hoseok right away. 

Wow...what a handsome man. He was clearly catching everyone’s attention. All the guys were. Women were lingering around their lounge area. They were whispering to each other and stealing glances. Hoseok sat there with his hair parted on the side, and it gelled in such a way that showed his forehead. Jimin was saying something to him while his eyes scanned the club. 

Oh right...they’re here on a mission. 

I started towards them, noticing the dirty looks from the women that were eying the men. Just before I reached them, I caught Hoseok’s eyes. 

I smiled at him and he showed a small smile, clearly distracted by whatever Jimin was saying to him. I got a few hellos from the guys as I approached. Jennie already had a drink in her hand, swaying to the music in her seat. I felt a bit awkward, shuffling around to find a seat. Yoongi, who sat on Hoseok’s other side, scooted over. I showed him a smile before taking the seat beside Hoseok.

 I took off my leather jacket and hung it on the back of the chair. Jennie comes out of nowhere and grabs me a drink. I take the glass, taking a small sip. The drink was bitter, and I felt it burn in the back of my throat for a while. 

I down the rest of the glass, my face scrunching up after. I stretched forward and set the cup down on the table. I glanced over to see Hoseok looking my way. 

He leaned in close to my ear, his arm going around my back and his hand sliding up the side of my ass to rest on my waist. 

“I didn’t know you were such a drinker.” His breath tickled my ear and I leaned my body closer to him.

“Yeah, cause you saw me tipsy at the gala. I usually handle alcohol better than that.” I jeered. Our faces were close enough that I’d only have to turn a bit to catch the corner of his lips. Ugh, I want to kiss him. I should just do it. What’s the worst that could happen? 

“Do you want to dance?” I asked bravely. 

“I’m here for work, so I can’t. You don’t have to stay here beside me, you can go have fun.” 

I look around the club, the pounding music and the lights giving me a few previews of people dancing. I spot a few women shooting me glares and I think Hoseok catches it. I can barely make out the small chuckle from him.

“What will glaring at me do for them?” I muttered to Hoseok.

“It makes them feel better. I don’t come to these places often because women flock to me. Most want money, or want to sleep with me.” 

I nod understanding, “Well I don’t want your money so don’t worry.” 

Hoseok grins while raising his eyebrows, “So you want to sleep with me?” 

My eyes widen in horror, “No! No, I didn’t mean it like that! Not that I wouldn’t want to sleep with you! You’re a very fine man, and it’s natural to be attracted to you not only emotionally but physically--”

I am cut off by a familiar voice calling me through the loud music.

“Let’s dance!” Jennie says when I finally meet her eyes. Hoseok removes his arm from around me.

“Go have fun.” He said and turned his attention back to Jimin. I rose up from my seat, my face still burning from the conversation I just had with Hoseok. 

Jennie and I make our way to the dance floor, a smooth RnB track playing. It was a good time. The music kept going and Jennie and I kept dancing, having a good time. I was honestly feeling myself, and though there were a few guys who tried to dance with me but left me along after I gave a stern head shake, it was a wonderful time. 

The song changed to “Before I let You Go”, the Beyonce one, and I found my energy all over again. I had eyes closed and moved to the beat, moving my hips to the addictive beats singing along to the words. 

I can’t find Jennie, and I’m not sure where she has gone. I panic for a second when I spot her talking with this girl. Based on the hand gestures, they were going on about each other's outfits. I decided to head towards the bathroom really quick. I wandered around the club for a few minutes before I noticed the neon-lit sign that pointed out the bathroom.

I went into the ladies' bathroom and did my business while hovering over the toilet seat. The thought of the possible germs made my skin crawl.

I washed my hands and dried them quickly before heading to the door. As I got to the door, I decided to fix and straighten up my dress when I heard something from the narrow hallway outside the bathroom. 

“I heard they work for Seok.” A rough voice hissed. It was hard to hear them, and though the music was muffled, it still overpowering some of what they said.

“I know for sure! The way they’re watching everything, and I saw one of them sniffing around our meet-up spot! They’re onto us!” Another voice said.

“Who do you think is leading them? I say the one in the silk shirt. Let’s send Seok a message! He can’t squish us so easily! After this, everyone on the streets will believe we’re Seok! That faceless coward will never come out in the open.” The first voice said. 

I felt my body freeze and for a second, I stopped thinking. I waited a second before pushing the bathroom door open. I didn’t see anyone in the hallway. I’m sure they left. My pulse was throbbing to the point my vision was pulsing. My breathing grew heavy and I took off into the club. There was no way to get to the lounge without going through the dance floor so I pushed past people, ignoring the insults I heard. 

I have to tell Hoseok, I have to tell the guys! I don’t know what those men are planning but they’re targeting Hoseok! They think he works for Seok and not that he is Seok. I am scared of whatever lesson they want to teach.  

I rush through the hot and sticky bodies till I get to one of the opening points of the dance floor. Hoseok is standing now, looking down at his phone. He was no longer in the pit but stood on the higher floor. I feel relief but it’s short-lived. On my further left, against the wall of the dance floor, body almost concealed by a group of dancing girls was a man who’s angry gaze was focused on Hoseok. I watched as the man reached into his jacket, pulling out a silver handgun. It glinted in the lights as he held it down near his thigh. 

No. No. Oh god no. My body moved before I could think. My eyes focused on Hoseok and flickering to the man. Before I reached Hoseok, he looked up from his phone and smiled. I can’t be sure what my face looked like at the moment. I didn’t want the man to know I was onto him. I don’t know how many guys he had with him or what they’d do. But I was almost jogging to Hoseok. 

“Where’d you go? I was looking for you--” My body slammed against Hoseok and I wrapped my arms around him as if I was giving him a hug. At the same moment, I felt a burning pain in my side. My face scrunched up and my eyes began to water. I noticed I could just barely see over Hoseok’s shoulder. All the guys are rising to their feet in concern. 

It was my running. It was my sudden hug. They hadn’t realized. Hoseok hadn’t realized. 

He chuckled, “Did you miss me already?” He kept his arms at his side, chuckling at my action. The pain was growing throughout my side and I was losing strength in my body. My breathing became labored in Hoseok’s ear.

“Hoseok.” My voice was feeble and weak. My arms went slack and my body leaned on him. 

“Y/n?” Hoseok asked, finally wrapping his arms around me.  He was all that was holding me up. The next moment, a scream was heard. Though it drowned in the sound of the music, the horrified scream managed to pierce through. Had to be Jennie. Had to be. I was bleeding. Could she see it? I could definitely feel it. Where was she?

“Y-y/n?” Hoseok called again, this time his voice was trembling. There was something I’d never heard before. 

Fear. Hoseok was scared. 

His arms tighten around me, and I felt his hand touch the area in which the pain was greatest.

“Y-you’re bleeding? Y/n? Y/n!” My hearing was coming and going as my heart hammered in my ear. 

Was it my heart beating so wildly? Was it Hoseok’s heart?

Hoseok barked some orders in which I saw some blurred figures moving around us. I...I hope those bad guys don’t escape. 

“I’m...tired.” The words are broken as they leave my lips. Before I know it I am swept off my feet. I’m being carried by Hoseok. He’s running. Someone is speaking? Jennie? Hoseok? 

The music is going quiet. Everything is going quiet. Everything is going black.

“Please Y/n.” A voice pleaded, “Y/n? Stay awake for me.” 

Black. Everything turned black and everything grew quiet. 

It’s warm and it smells like Hoseok.

♠----♠----♠-----♠

 The next chapter is coming soon. I’m already halfway with the next chapter! My question for you, for this chapter! Do you think this chapter could have used more details? I didn’t feel like this chapter needed details. But I also feel like it lacked. 

like, reblog and comment! Let me know what you think! 

[hisunshiine]

Escape ✈︎ Chapter 4

✈︎ chapter 4: you have been cordially invited... |✈︎ Escape Series—18+, Mature     

   ✈︎ genre: fluff, future smut

   ✈︎ word count: 2,736 words 

   ✈︎ pairing: jungkook x [redacted] (at the very end)

   ✈︎ warnings: alcohol consumption

   ✈︎ summary: A look into what it's like arriving to Bangtania...

| series masterlist | previous | next | hisunshiine | mrsparkjimin18 |

Everyday, since the very beginning when it was announced, you have sat at your computer or been on your phone in order to participate in the giveaway for a chance to go to Bangtania Island. Every week, one lucky person has a chance to win an exclusive invitation from the girls who organized it, all expenses paid for them to relocate out there.  

Friday couldn’t have come soon enough; your job was draining. A typical 9-5, doing office work was monotonous and you slogged through the week waiting for your weekends to come. Despite the wish to find something else, nobody was hiring in your city. Not for anything you wanted to do, anyways. Deep in your gut you felt the need for something more, instead of the repetitious clacking of your fingers against the keyboard, answering the phones, and feeling like a machine.

Fortunately, it’s the weekend, so you decide to stop and grab a bottle of wine and make your way home. You’re ready to unwind with some youtube videos and spend time browsing your social media for anything interesting. You pour a glass of wine and relax on the sofa, open your laptop and log in to twitter. You have a few notifications, including an update from the giveaway page, they had posted there was another winner chosen and that the winner would receive an email shortly.

“That was 30 minutes ago!?” You squeal to yourself, an unexplainable feeling creeping over you.

Just then your phone chimes, and you unlock the screen to check your notifications. You have multiple email notifications, so you check your email app as you sip your wine. Scrolling through them, it’s mainly junk mail, you see one that catches your eye.

Sender Name: Bangtania Island Mayor

Subject: You have been cordially invited…

Y/N,

Congratulations! You have been selected as the next lucky winner to be invited to Bangtania Island. In order to accept this invitation, please click on the link and fill out the application. Documents you may need to gather prior to completing the forms in the link are:

Driver’s License

Social Security Card

Passport

Please make sure to include the earliest date for you to travel, and please have your physical completed prior to boarding the plane. All documents needed are attached to the email. Please make sure to electronically sign them and reply to this email with the completed documents. If you have any questions in regards to the forms, please do not hesitate to reach out. Upon completion of all required documents per your reply email, you will receive your e-ticket for travel.

The following are the guidelines and stipulations for traveling to Bangtania Island:

You will receive a one-way ticket, free of cost. You will be picked up from the airport and transported to the boat, which will bring you to the island. You will be given a limited amount of time to decide if you would like to stay as a permanent resident of Bangtania, approximately 2 weeks. Prior to you being granted full access to the island, you will meet with the Deputy Mayor who will greet you at the dock, completing a brief in-person interview. If you decide to leave or prove unfit for the island at that time, a complimentary ticket home will be provided to you up until the 2-week window.

Thank you,

Vanessa

Deputy Mayor of the Mayor’s Office, Bangtania Island

You couldn’t stop yourself from spilling some wine as you low-key panicked. You knew there was a very good possibility of being chosen; some of your mutuals on twitter had already left to go there, and while you had seen them briefly on the TL, it was never for long and they didn’t say anything other than that they were enjoying themselves immensely and to share the sweepstakes link.

You set down what was left of your wine that hadn’t spilt into your lap, and ran around your room, pulling clothes off of their hangers and out of your dresser drawers before you remembered you hadn’t even clicked the link to complete the forms. 

Pausing in the middle of your bedroom, arms filled with random clothes, you took 7 deep breaths to try and calm down before dropping your handful of clothes into your pen and waiting suitcase. Sitting back down, you calmly clicked the link and once transported to the secure website, you filled in the information needed so that your flight could be purchased for you as well as any other accommodations you may need could be handled by the ones in charge. 

You printed out the forms needed for the physical, jotted down some notes to go to the doctor on Monday to complete the form, and decided that the earliest you would be able to fly out was Wednesday. That gives you enough time to go to your job, request use of your vacation hours for the next 2 weeks, and turn in your two week notice. You didn’t ever want to come back to that shit hole.

You celebrated the news by turning up your bluetooth speaker and blasting your favorite upbeat BTS songs while you packed up everything you would need. Hasta La Vista!

Catching your flight was easier than you thought it would be, as you had an upgraded flight in first class. You were given star treatment, access to a separate waiting area with complimentary food and drinks, less people to deal with, comfortable seats, the works. You couldn’t believe that ARMY was able to provide all of this for you, but who were you to complain? 

The boat ride was also nice, more like taking a large yacht across the water to the island, you stood at the bough of the boat for most of the trip, enjoying the view as you became farther and farther away from everything that was shitty about your life and closer to everything you wanted. An escape into a world that was full of other people who were like you, liked the same music, had the same mindset, and you got to do it all on a paradise island? Hell fucking yeah.

After docking, you rolled your luggage behind you as you disembarked from the ramp, and saw a girl waiting for you. She was short but cute, a friendly smile and aura of being in charge. Her cheeks were slightly sunburnt, but you were envious of the way she looked refreshed, skin glowing. You couldn’t wait for that to be you; sunkissed and relaxed from the ocean breeze and too many margaritas.

“Y/n?” She asked, and you nodded.

“Welcome! I’m Vanessa, I hope that your trip went well?”

“Oh yea, it was awesome, thank you!”

“No problem, congratulations on winning! So before we go off to the fun stuff, we have a brief interview and a few more things to go over, and then I’ll give you a tour of the island and show you to your place. If you’ll follow me?”

Vanessa led the way to a golf cart and you climbed on, your luggage secured in the back seat of the cart. She turned the key, and you were speeding off towards a large house. It was painted white with accents of brick, and green ivy climbing lattices. The windows were large and beautiful, and you felt like you had seen them somewhere before. Like they were in a magazine or some type of professional photos or something. You shrugged off the feeling of deja vu, and followed Vanessa into the house.

The windows were open and provided a good amount of sunlight into the entryway, and you tried to take in as much as you could see as Vanessa walked past a staircase and led you towards the back of the house and into a side room. It was an office, with bright white walls and a large sturdy desk. A bookshelf was the entire wall behind the desk, where she now sat at. 

She gestured to the plush chair in front of her desk and you sat down, suddenly nervous. For such a large house, it was pretty quiet, and you wondered where all the other people were. Was this actually all an elaborate trick to sell you into sex trafficking and you were brought here to die?!

You calmed your thoughts once you heard laughter from somewhere above you, and music playing lightly from another area of the house.

“So, once again, welcome! I am the deputy mayor here, and basically in charge of getting you all settled. We are a formal nation, Bangtania, with a president, a whole government system, and we’re working on expanding the businesses here. Before I can reveal anything more to you, I do need to have you sign the Non-Disclosure Agreement here in person. I know that I sent it to you via email for you to read and electronically sign, but I like to cover all of my bases.”

Like clockwork, another woman walked into the open office door, carrying a glass of wine and some papers. She took a sip and handed the papers to Vanessa, who thanked her as she headed back out of the room. The woman blew a kiss and disappeared around the corner.

“That’s my best friend, Talia, and definitely the reason that all of this was even put into motion,” Vanessa said as she shuffled the papers before straightening them gently by tapping the edges on the desk. She stapled the corner, binding the papers together, and passed it over to you.

“I know you read over most of this, but I want to reiterate a few points anyways. From the moment you leave this office, you are not to share with anyone about the other people on this island. When you first applied to the giveaway sweepstakes, you gave us your social media handles. While we won’t take away social media from you, your posts will be monitored for identifying certain people who wish to remain anonymous while here. Please always ask anyone before posting and triple check photos as well.”

She points to a section and you initial, stating you understand.

“You have a two week period here to see how you like it. You don’t have to stay if you do not want to. After that time, you will be issued a passport for Bangtania, a resident ID, and be included in our census. You will have dual citizenship for here and for your home country as well.”

“If you choose to leave within the 2 week window, it’s no charge. If you choose to leave after, you will have to fund your flight home yourself. We will pay for your boat ride back to the mainland, and from there you can negotiate work or if you have money saved just in case, you can fly out. Also, if you choose to stay, you can always fly out to visit friends and family, just remember the NDA is always in affect.”

You initialed again.

Vanessa led you through a few more sections of the contract, and you learned that a few of the girls on the island were nurses and so if you were sick or needed minor medical attention, they would help you. Everything else was pretty much provided to you, and all they asked was that they could use your skills in return. 

You weren’t surprised they knew you had skills with computers and answering phones, which made you a perfect candidate to work in the main house under Vanessa doing secretarial work for her best friend, Talia. It wouldn’t be a lot of work, you would have plenty of time to enjoy the beach and rest, and the work would be related to the giveaway, running the island, and other fun BTS related things, so you were excited.

Signing your last signature on the bottom of the last page, Vanessa took the document, notarized it, and put it away in a locked filing cabinet next to her desk.

“Now, if you’re ready, I’d love to give you a tour of the island and show you where you’ll be staying.”

After seeing the main areas that people hung out at, you went towards what looked like a restaurant, which was good because you were hungry. Vanessa parked the golf cart next to a few others, and she held the door open for you.

You almost fainted. Seated at the table right when you walked in was none other than the 7 boys that were the reason you lived. BTS. Namjoon, Jimin, Yoongi, Taehyung, and Jungkook were sat at the table, and as you looked around, you saw that in between them sat other girls, including mutuals you knew were living here. Hobi appeared from swinging doors that led to what you assumed was the kitchen, delivering plates of food from a platter as a few girls followed him as well with drinks.

“C’mon Y/N, don’t be shy. Isn’t this what you wanted?” Vanessa laughed, taking in your shocked expression.

After eating, and sharing some conversation with Jin and Yoongi, you were ready for a nap. Jin was an exceptional cook, and you were full to the brim. Vanessa waved bye to everyone, a lingering hand on a certain male’s shoulder as she walked away, leading you back outside. As you sat back on the leather seat of the cart, she checked in with you.

“I’m definitely still in shock, but now I understand the NDA a lot more.” You chuckled as she drove you towards another house. It was just as big as the main house, as you heard several people call it, but the style was more relaxed and upon entering it, you realized it was because it was lived in. It was two stories, with a large open concept downstairs with a living room and kitchen, and rooms upstairs. You dragged your suitcase up the flight and Vanessa unlocked a room for you with a key before handing it to you.

“This is our newcomer guest room. We will have a room ready for you after your 2 weeks are up, if you decide to stay. For now, most people have said staying with me and Talia has been helpful if they had questions or needed anything, but any of the girls will help you, everyone is super nice.”

You looked around the room; it was spacious with a nice big bay window that allowed a decent amount of sunlight in.

“I’ll leave you to get settled in. Feel free to explore some more, and tomorrow we will have our weekly game night so you can meet everyone in a more relaxed setting and have fun. It’s our way of welcoming you to Bangtania.”

Vanessa let herself out of the room, closing the door softly. You wanted to explore, but at the moment the bed was calling to you. You lay down in the spot where the sun was pooling, curling yourself into the warmth and passed out. Jet Lag was a bitch.

When you finally rejoined the waking world, it was definitely not waking hours. The sun had set, and you shiver, the ocean breeze now too cool in your bedroom. You get up, throwing a MOTS tour hoodie on, and climb back in the bed, attempting to go back to sleep. Tossing and turning for about 15 minutes, sleep evades you. You must have caught up on all of your missing sleep with that ‘nap’ you took. Like you said, Jet lag is a bitch. Not wanting to continue to lay there restless, you slip out of the room and down the stairs.

You walk along the road, past other houses, finding yourself walking into sand. Sitting on the beach, enjoying the sound of the waves, you finally begin to feel tired. Rather than fall asleep on the beach, you make your way back to the house.

You head up the stairs and start down the hall, being as quiet as possible since it’s late and everyone is asleep. At least you assume they are all asleep, until you hear a very familiar voice coming from Vanessa’s room.

“Come here Princess, why are you acting this way?” You step closer to the door that is slightly ajar. You can’t believe what you are seeing, but you can’t stop watching either.

↣ all rights reserved © hisunshiine & mrsparkjimin18 2020-2021. please do not repost. translations & modifications are not allowed.

[pipou]

When the pandemic started and the work from home setup became the new normal, we were living in a small space. It was a struggle for my housemates and I to be productive since we only have two tables available - our dinning table and an old side table. These kept us going though with our daily work life, until we decided to look for a new place so we could all be comfortable while working. Also, so we could avoid video bombing each other while in virtual meetings.

A year has passed in our new house. I have pushed and rearranged my own workstation at least four times since we moved, watched hundred youtube videos about work from home desk setup, and spent thousands in Shopee, Lazada, and Facebook Marketplace, I think I am finally settled in my own personal space. Since work and personal life is now integrated, I made sure my current desk setup allows me to enjoy both.

I thought of sharing the items found on my desk hoping to inspire others make the most of the current situation.

1. Dell laptop - This is company provided and comes with an extra monitor, wired keyboard, and mouse. As you see, I ditched the accessories. This gadget helped me buy all the gadgets you will read next.

2. Xiaomi Redmi Display 1C Monitor - This has been on my mind since the year started. It has a nice display at an affordable price. This is where I connect my personal and work laptop.

3. Xiaomi Mijia LED Table Lamp - This serves as my ring light during meetings and most of the time my sleep lamp. You can adjust the light according to your preference.

4. iPhone XR - Though I was issued a company phone, my personal phone is busier as I use it to get in touch with my team. This is where most of the action happens.

5. Logitech M350 Pebble - It's the design that got me, plus you can connect it via bluetooth or USB. Hence, it's easy to switch device without having to disconnect and reconnect.

6. Logitech K380 Keyboard - This is a multi-device bluetooth keyboard. Just like my mouse, I am able to connect this little fellow to three devices and switch whenever I need to.

7. Apple Watch SE - I bought this watch so I could easily unlock my phone when I am outside wearing face mask. I didn't know it will also be useful in unlocking my Mac Mini. What I like about this watch is I can read and reply to messages and receive calls provided my phone's just nearby.

8. iPad 8th Gen - This item holds everything I need. This has apps for drawing, journaling, and singing. I couldn't get my hands off of it during weekends. I used to have a lot of notebooks and drawing pads. Now, they are all useless.

9. JBL Flip 5 - This portable speaker allows multi-connectivity as well. The sound is excellent and battery life is superb. It just doesn't go well with my color scheme.

10. Mac Mini M1 - This CPU is a beast! I don't want my monitor to just be connected to my work laptop, and since my personal laptop doesn't perform well when we need to edit videos, this device is the best solution.

Being excited to sit and start your day to work or just to let time pass, is a feeling we should all feel everyday. I think having personalized desk setup with the stuff you need definitely helps in making yourself productive. How's your current desk setup?