#i have 7 tabs open on GOD i will find it

[solargeist]

Uh vampbhr would definitely be the guy to recite THAT part from Romeo and Juliet to the sun.

the stanza about the envious moon, glorious sun smth like that

Thissss part ?

Vampbur defo speaks like a Shakespearean character when referring to the sun

[gurugirl]

A Good Boy | 1. Surrender

Summary: Harry's got the hots for his young stepmom and she's pretty fond of him too. But they're both trying really hard to be good. Loosely based on this ask.

A/N: This is stepmom!reader x virgin stepson!harry. There is a 7 year age gap and Harry met her at the age of 19. He is 21 in this story.

Word count: 21.4k words

Warning: 18+ only, NSFW, inappropriate relationship between a stepmom & virgin stepson, smut

A Good Boy Masterlist

Her husband, Leonardo, was the kind of man that could only be described as a provider. Not a lover, not a sweet man, not a gentle soul. Just a provider. Her mother asked her why she was marrying the older man, “Y/n he’s 15 years your senior! It’s preposterous! He’s rich but you can find real love…” She’d heard it all. But she was interested in having nice things. Being able to finish her art and history degree and go to the tennis club and shop with her girlfriends.

He also bought her the cutest little red Mercedes and the biggest diamond ring. And his house was- well it wasn’t just a house. It was an estate sat in the Hollywood hills near other celebrities and affluent humans (or robots she sometimes thought). She even had her own bedroom. It was an odd setup for sure, but a setup nonetheless.

Leonardo made it clear. He wasn’t looking for love. He was looking for a pretty thing with a good head on her shoulders that he could fuck when he needed and buy nice things for. Someone to bring with him when he had to show face at events and parties who could hold a somewhat intelligent conversation. She could do that. And he wasn’t a bad-looking man either. He was fit and tall with a deep voice and his deep pockets were just the cherry on top.

Did this make her a gold digger? She supposed that yes, it did. But what of her husband? This was what he wanted too. No one was being tricked. Everything was very simple and clearly defined. Down to the fact that she could sleep with anyone she wanted as long as she was discreet and didn’t give him the details. The same went for Leo.

Though Y/n hadn’t been interested in sleeping with anyone else, she was certain Leo did on his business trips and “boys-only vacations” he often took with his friends.

Y/n wasn’t bothered by the lack of love or the fact that her marriage wasn’t conventional. She was getting everything she wanted and she was happy. Sure a little intimacy was nice but she had close friends and so far, that was all she needed.

.           .           .

“Leo! Marla is here with the Uber! I’ll see you later!” She shouted toward his study as she made her way out the door. It was Friday night. Girl’s night. Every other Friday she, Marla, Cyndee, and Gina met at Murphy’s Lounge to dance and drink a few too many martinis. It was always fun. Sometimes she flirted with some man who wanted to dance. But never anything more. She could have if she wanted. More. She could have done more but she never felt the need. No one interested her enough to make that sort of leap into partaking in the open aspect of her marriage.

The bar was full, as it usually was at 8 pm on a Friday night. Gina and Cyndee had already secured a table and had cocktails in hand when she and Marla got there.

And just like every time the four of them got together, they acted as if they hadn’t seen one another in ages. Sometimes they could be overly dramatic in their greetings but they genuinely appreciated one another.

“Okay. The first round is on me, but the rest is on Daddy Leo,” Cyndee bubbled out her words in laughter.

Y/n playfully smacked Cyndee’s arm, “Oh so now you’re calling my husband Daddy?!” She rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, I am. He’s a Daddy, Y/n. Like, there’s no way you don’t call him Daddy when-“

Y/n placed her hand over Cyndee’s mouth, “Oh my god you’re too much sometimes! No more talk of Leo! The rest of the drinks are on him and we’ll leave it at that,” she laughed.

That was usually how it went. Leonardo picked up their girl’s night tab and paid for their taxis or Ubers.

“Okay. We’re just gonna get our drinks and we’ll be right back.” Marla swept Y/n off to the bar so they could order their usual drinks. For Y/n it was a nice stiff lemon drop martini.

Marla ordered a whisky sour, with extra orange slices and then rambled on about Ryan, her on-again, off-again boyfriend. They were on again at that moment but she was wearing thin, once again.

“Why do you do it to yourself, Marla? If you want to be done then just be done. You’ve tried and it hasn’t worked. I feel like you could do better anyway. Ryan’s nice but I think you two have run your course.”

“Ughh… I know, Y/n. God do I know. Easier said than done. There’s so much history, and friends in common. And we have a fucking dog together! I just… I don’t know.”

The bartender handed them their drinks and then Y/n gave the guy her credit card, “Please put this card in place of Cyndee Daniels tab. We’ll use this one instead.”

Josh was the bartender that evening. A cute college-aged young man with a bright smile who always remembered her name.

“Of course, Ms. Y/n. Will swap these out. As usual.” He winked.

She leaned over the bar as she took a quick sip of her martini while Josh went to retrieve Cyndee’s card. She looked down the bar at the faces of other patrons and suddenly was met with the clear green eyes of Leo’s son, Harry. Her stepson. She wasn’t sure if he’d seen her and it wasn’t as if Y/n had done anything wrong but she just hadn’t expected to see him there.

She leaned up again, peering around the woman sitting on the stool to her left and her eyes landed on the young man. Freshly shorn dark curls and a soft pink smile crooked up as he spoke animatedly to the guy sitting next to him. And just as she assumed he hadn’t seen her he turned and looked at her squarely, his lips moving as he spoke something to his friend then nodding in acknowledgment at Y/n before pulling himself off the stool he was on and making his way across the bar to her.

“Is that Harry?” Marla spoke as she leaned in.

“Yes, it is.”

Harry was a nice young man. He was polite, sometimes overly polite she thought, and he was charming. Y/n liked Harry. She didn’t know him all that well. He lived on campus at the university so she saw him rarely. But she did recognize that he’d cut his hair. He had long dark curls when she first met him. He looked like a bad boy, covered in tattoos with a permanent smirk on his face. But once she got to talking to him, she realized, he was a big sweetheart really. The long dark hair and tattoos were just a look. A style. Harry was a nice young man.

The truth was, all the girls joked about how attractive Leo and his son were. Both men were quite handsome. Y/n couldn’t deny that. Harry was tall like his father and built nicely. Long legs and a well-muscled chest. A great jawline and crystal green eyes that allured.

“Hi, Y/n. Marla,” Harry spoke as he looked from Y/n to Marla.

And that was another thing about him. He always remembered everyone’s name. He had met Marla maybe twice, yet here he was drinking beers at a bar and remembering the name of Y/n’s best friend whom he barely knew.

“Hi Harry,” Y/n smiled up at him, “Like the hair,” She reached up and whisked a finger into a short curl before bringing her hand back down into her own space.

Harry smiled broadly, a glorious dimple digging into his cheek as he raised an arm and ran his long fingers through his soft dark hair, “Oh! Yeah. Thank you. Got it cut a few weeks ago. Still getting used to it. Um, how are you doing?”

“Good. Girl’s Night, you know,” she shrugged and looked over at Marla who stood next to her, “We’re here every other Friday for some dancing and drinks,” when she turned her gaze back to Harry’s his soft eyes were intently watching her as she spoke. “Um, yeah. How are you? How’s school?”

Harry tipped himself forward to his toes and then lowered back down to his normal height, “Good. S’good. Already looking forward to Spring break,” he chuckled.

“Oh yeah! Me too. I’m not even in school anymore and I’m already making plans,” she chuckled.

Suddenly something dawned on Y/n. Her eyes went wide and then she squinted as she looked at her stepson, “Wait. You’re not 21. You’re too young to be here, Mister.”

Harry snorted a laugh and nodded, “I know. I know. But I’m turning 21 in two weeks. Figured I’d try out my fake ID once in my life. Before it’s too late,” he grinned.

“So you’ve never done this before?”

“Nope. First time. And of course, my stepmom is here when I do. Just my luck.”

Y/n laughed and her smile almost hurt her cheeks it was so wide.

A small jab to her side reminded her that Marla was still standing there, “Oh, sorry. Yeah. We should be heading back. We’re just over there if you want to stop by and say hi to the girls.” She pointed to the table where Cyndee and Gina were already watching the scene.

“Sure. Yeah. Of course. Um, it was really nice to see you, Marla,” Harry smiled gently at her and then looked back down to Y/n, “I’ll come by and say hi before I leave.”

The moment Y/n got to the table Cyndee pulled her arm, “Your stepson. Oof. He’s really attractive. Have you and him ever… you know?” She joked. Of course, Cyndee knew better.

“Oh stop it! Of course not! He’s a 20-year-old kid!” Y/n spoke in exasperation.

“You’re only 27, Y/n. You’re not much older. In fact, you’re closer to his age than you are to Leo’s,” Gina said.

Now Gina was usually the voice of reason so to have her on Cyndee’s side was ludicrous. Of course, she knew Cyndee was teasing but still.

Y/n took her seat and rolled her eyes as she took a healthy gulp of her sweet and tangy martini.

“And his haircut. God, he’s adorable like that. Damn,” Marla spoke next to her.

The music eventually began to grow louder and the martinis were going down far too easily. Especially after dancing and working up a sweat away from her seat. But one thing that didn’t change through the night was that her eyes kept finding Harry’s. It was like she couldn’t stop glancing over at him. But it didn’t help that every time she dared to peek he was looking at her already.

She couldn’t be sure that he was watching her dance but there was something about just the idea that he might be that had her swaying her hips a little more sensuously and using her hands to rub down her body like she was some kind of sexpot. But in truth, her dance moves were definitely subpar. But three martinis will tend to make one feel unnecessarily bold.

Y/n decided on just one more drink. A fourth martini to round out the night, plus she wanted to walk up to the bar near Harry and talk to him a little bit more. Just a friendly little tease about how he was only sitting and not dancing. Even his friend had gotten off the stool and danced with a young woman on the dance floor for a bit.

“You’re not really making the most of this special night, Harry,” she elbowed at his arm gently as she leaned over the bar to wave at Josh.

“What do you mean?” Harry’s eyes were a little red and he was quite obviously a little drunk.

She looked down at his wetted lips and back up to his pretty eyes, “You’re not even dancing. Just sitting here like a lump drinking beer after beer.”

“Ms. Y/n, another lemon drop?” Josh spoke as he put his hands on the bar top in front of her.

“Yes, please, Josh, and close it out too. I think all the girls are done for the night.” She laughed.

She turned back to look at Harry, “So no girls here you want to dance with? Even your buddy got out there a little bit. Where is he by the way?”

Harry turned around and looked over his shoulder for his friend and shrugged, “Maybe shagging in the bathroom. Haven’t seen him in a while now that I think of it. And no. No girls here I want to dance with.”

Y/n pouted and tilted her head as she reached up to touch his hair again, “I’ve seen a bunch of pretty girls around your age here, Harry. Some even checking you out. You should get out there and dance a little. Really fully experience Murphy’s Lounge,” she looked over her shoulder and then leaned in to speak quietly, “It’s your last chance with your fake ID,” she smiled as she tugged his curl the smallest bit.

Harry smirked, “Child abuse!” Craning his neck away from her fingers, he patted at his hair as if the tiny tug had hurt.

She rolled her eyes as Josh returned with the drink and her card, “See you in a couple weeks.” He smiled at her before returning to the other customers.

Harry’s features became serious again, “You know him?”

Y/n sipped her martini and nodded, “Yeah. We’re here often enough. So, yeah.” She shrugged keeping her eyes on her adorable stepson. Okay, maybe it was more like adorably handsome stepson, but still.

“Come. I’m gonna put this away,” she lifted her card upward as she motioned him to follow her, “And you and I are going out there to dance a little. We’ll find you someone cute to groove with a little.”

She expected Harry to protest a bit but he didn’t. He stepped in behind her and followed her to her table with his beer in hand. He stayed close to her as she bent down to slip her credit card into her purse. The security in the room always watched their table so no one took their things or tampered with their drinks (and the nice little tip Y/n, by way of Leo, didn’t hurt either).

“Leave your beer here. We’re gonna need our hands free!” she giggled as she pointed at the table.

“You’re okay to leave your drinks out like this? Thought that was a big no-no.”

Y/n looked in the direction of the man standing a few feet away, “He’s watching over the table. Now come on!”

The floor was packed with warm bodies moving and gyrating. The music was loud and the rhythmic base could be felt underfoot. She’d long lost sight of the girls as she began to sway and raise her arms upward.

Harry stayed close to his stepmom’s side and shuffled around a bit. His body was a bit stiff but he laughed when Y/n grabbed his hands and made him spin, “Loosen up a bit! Come on, Harry!”

Rolling his eyes he grinned and began to dramatically move about, trying to feel the beat and push down how awkward his movements felt.

Y/n kept her hands on his to encourage him to move with her and they both laughed as Harry began to relax into it a bit. His big smile only widened as the song was switched up to something that felt quite naughty and suggestive.

She released his hands because it felt like he was getting the hang of it. Not to mention she was beginning to enjoy the way his big hands fit around hers. And that couldn’t happen.

She turned around and continued swinging her hips and, moving with the rhythm as best she could. Long moments went by and she closed her eyes and allowed herself to get back into the swing of dancing and feeling the freedom and excitement of her night.

A hand pulled at her hip from behind and she opened her eyes and turned to see her stepson towering over her from behind. She hadn’t expected the sudden grip he had on her so she turned in confusion causing his palm to fall away. Harry looked over her shoulder and then dipped down to speak into her ear, “A man came over and was just about to try something with you. Wanted to discourage him a bit. Sorry.”

Y/n followed where he was looking and there was indeed a man there looking at her. And it wouldn’t have been too out of the ordinary for this to happen. She dealt with these things well usually. Sometimes she’d dance a little and flirt a little but that was it. It didn’t bother her. It was all in fun.

She chuckled and pulled at Harry’s shoulder to speak in his ear, “You don’t have to worry about me, Harry. I can take care of myself. I’m a big girl. But thank you.”

Harry licked his lips and turned his face toward her to speak, “I know you’re all grown up. Just didn’t want to see that with my own eyes is all.” His words were spoken close to her ear, his deep baritone vibrating from her neck and over her ear as she turned to look at him, only he didn’t move his face away and their gazes connected for a moment longer than felt innocent.

She swallowed and a small smile plucked upward on her lips, “Okay. Do you want to stay close then? Protect from the predators while I dance?” Her smile widened and she laughed but Harry’s smirk felt like something just the opposite of funny as he looked down over her face and to her neck and then over her lips.

“I’m not going anywhere,” his smirk remained as he shook his head and then in a surprise motion turned her around to face away and put both hands at her hips as they began dancing together.

She could feel his heat from behind her and his fingers held onto her hips possessively but she liked it. Especially when her hips moved to the beat and Harry’s hips moved behind her. He wasn’t pressing himself into her backside but she could feel him moving with her. He was keeping a polite distance. Though, everything that was happening was very inappropriate.

It was inappropriate because she liked it. Because this attractive young man behind her was looking at her in a way she noted was not innocent. Because she’d been obviously flirting with him at the bar. Because Harry was her stepson.

When the beat dropped low and the song slowed to something even more provocative and playful they both slowed and she felt Harry’s thumbs on the bit of skin exposed between the bottom hem of her blouse to just above her skirt’s waistline. His grasp on her skin was burning into her flesh, his fingers gently brushing and then squeezing at her.

“You’re not a bad dancer,” Harry remarked into her ear and she felt his chest press into her back.

And without thinking too deeply about it, or perhaps it was the martinis that left her so uninhibited, she dropped her head back and toward his mouth and felt his lips at her ear, “I’m a terrible dancer. But thank you anyway.” She laughed.

Harry chuckled into her ear, not backing away from how she’d leaned into him but instead pulling at her just enough that his fingers pinched her waist and she could feel him smile as he spoke against her ear, “Nothing about you is terrible, Y/n.”

His deep tone gave her a chill and goosebumps traveled down her neck and over her bare arms. Her good sense had been momentarily suspended as she smiled and dared to move her bottom into his hips.

When she heard his groan in her ear she closed her eyes and placed her hands over his, pressing his hands flat over her waist so she could feel his long fingers under hers, feel his warm palms digging into her skin.

“Better stop. I’m getting a little,” Harry suddenly backed off, his hands releasing her hips and she turned to look up at him as he ran a hand through his hair. He was flushed and his pupils were large, making his soft greens appear dark and heavy as he looked at her with an unmistakable glint of lust. She was sure she looked the same.

“Of course. Yeah. It was fun, though,” she smiled as she began to head back to the table. Harry followed.

They slid into the booth and took their drinks, letting the music of the bar fill in the gaps of their silence.

Y/n realized she was wet. She scolded herself inwardly. Her stepson was off-limits. Hell, to her most men were off limits because she was married (despite her open marriage). But especially Harry. She didn’t know if she should apologize or just let everything that had happened slip away without acknowledgment.

They were both drinking and so that had something to do with her behavior. With his. But mostly hers because she was the stepmom. She should have known better.

“Sorry we didn’t find you a cute girl to dance with,” she offered as she rounded her eyes and grinned, trying to make light of everything and ignore what had just happened between them.

Harry shook his head and looked down at his beer, then shifted his eyes to hers, “I think we did find me a cute girl to dance with,” he licked his lips and huffed a laugh shaking his head again as he lifted his beer.

“I’m done done done! Some guy bought me two shots. On top of the four cocktails I had. I’m fucked. I need to get out of here so I can crash into bed. You okay to leave with me?” Marla was suddenly plopping down at the table as she slurred her speech.

Y/n laughed, glad for the interruption. She wasn’t sure how to respond to Harry’s comment, “Yeah. We can get out of here. Where’s Gina and Cyndee?”

Marla pointed at the edge of the dance floor. Two men flanked them with drinks in hand.

“As you can see, they’re fine.”

Marla, Y/n, and Harry stopped by to say goodbye to Cyndee and Gina before leaving the loud bar. The night air was sobering as she used her Uber app to call for a taxi. Harry stayed with them, like the gentleman he was until their ride showed up.

Marla flung herself into the car as Y/n squeezed Harry’s arm, “Thanks, Harry. I’ll see you… I don’t know when, but this was fun! Yeah? Oh! It’ll probably be for your birthday, right? Party at our house. That’s right,” Y/n was mostly talking to herself. They were throwing him a party. Of course, it was going to be a big bash. Tons of college kids and family and drinking since he was turning 21.

Harry nodded, “Yeah. Weekend after next. Saturday. I think I’ll come over Friday night and stay the whole weekend.”

.           .           .

Harry had always liked Y/n. She was sweet to him from the start. Right off he could tell she wasn’t like Leonardo’s other girlfriends. He’d gone through a lot of them and when he decided he liked Y/n enough to keep around, Harry was genuinely happy about it. His dad was kind of cold and overly structured at times but he always took care of his family and Harry wouldn’t mind having Y/n around. He was 19 when he met her.

Harry’s mom left Leo when he was just a boy. She remarried years later and Harry hadn’t seen her so happy ever. He chalked it up to his dad’s standoffish behavior. He barely showed Harry, love, even. But It was okay for Harry that way. His mom was warm and raised him well. She showed him more love than he’d ever need in a lifetime. She made up where his dad lacked.

So for that, Harry did feel a bit sad, for Y/n, who had such a bright smile and contagious laugh, to marry such a cold creature as his father. The kind that his mother left. His friends joked that Y/n was a gold-digger and they urged him to try and mess around with her. See how far he could take it. But that was out of the question. Not because his stepmom wasn’t smoking hot, but because she was his stepmom. There was just so much wrong with that.

It did irk him, though, that he found her so pretty. But it wasn’t just that. She was smart too. She was easy to talk to and she could keep up with Harry’s little goofy jokes and she never took herself too seriously. Despite having her lips painted red and wearing high-fashion couture courtesy of Leonardo Styles, she was fun and kind.

Harry also benefited from his dad’s money, though. Just because he opted to live with his mother until college didn’t mean he didn’t have everything he wanted. A nice car, nice clothes, vacations with friends, concerts, sporting events, the newest cellphone. Leo didn’t bat an eye if Harry wanted something. And eventually even gave him a credit card to use for anything he wanted.

Yeah, Leo Styles was fucking wealthy. Dirty wealthy. The kind that people hate to see because it’s so excessive and unnecessary that it’s ugly.

But what could Harry do? His dad was a little cold and filthy rich. He didn’t control how his dad dealt with his money, though plenty of people also lumped Harry in with all that. Assumed he was some spoiled rotten brat who’d grow up like his father.

And that was just the thing, though. His dad wasn’t mean or bad per se. He was just rich because of the Styles’ family fortune. And he rarely showed any emotion. His dad did do nice things for the community and donated to good causes, threw fundraisers, and funded schools for children with special needs and gymnasiums for the local children who didn’t have a place to go and play freely.

And he wanted a wife that was smart and pretty. Someone with a brain who could handle a good conversation with grace. Harry understood the arrangement well. There was no love involved but it was a marriage of convenience for both of them. No harm, no foul. Harry didn’t mind it. Others seemed to have heavier opinions about it, though.

“Damn, Harry. You gotta do something about that. She keeps looking over here at you. While she looks like that? Let’s get your v-card taken care of once and for all.”

“Stop it, Jay. She’s my stepmom.”

“So? You told me yourself she’s just married to your dad for the money-“

“No, that’s not what I said. And it doesn’t matter what kind of thing she and my dad have going on. It’s not gonna happen.”

“God look at her. She’s fucking fine, Harry. She wants you too. I can tell. Look you don’t have to take my advice but this one,” he said as he gestured toward Y/n, “She’s a tiger in bed. I guarantee. Look at her move. Bet she could show you a thing or two.”

Harry shoved Jay and shook his head as he looked away before he was caught staring at his stepmom again.

She was hot. Her skirt was short and her little top kept riding up so he could get the tiniest peek of her waistline each time she raised her arms. Harry didn’t want to let his mind wander to those kinds of places. He’d already recognized how gorgeous she was. Liked her personality and how funny she was. If she were younger and not his stepmom, maybe. Maybe.

“Rebecca’s over there. I’m gonna go dance with her a bit. Sheila is too. You should come out and dance! Meet someone! Get laid!”

Harry sighed and sipped his beer as he leaned away from Jay’s arm, “No thanks.”

He did want to get laid of course. It wasn’t like he couldn’t have found a willing participant. It just hadn’t ever happened. He’d messed around a bit but in all honesty, Harry had a hard time wrapping his mind around a quick fling or something that was only sex. He liked connection and love. Wanted that whole thing with someone before getting to that point in the relationship. He knew it was silly to take it so seriously. And it wasn’t like keeping his virginity was his goal. It was just that he wanted it to be with someone special. Yeah, he was a bit of a sap like that.

But no one would know it really. That Harry was a big sap. A virgin at almost 21. Only his closest friends knew and they were sworn to secrecy. People assumed Harry had had lots of sex. That he was fucking people left and right. Because Harry was a flirt. He was super smooth and confident and charming. The kind of man people would imagine just had tons of sex. Plus he was incredibly attractive.

When Y/n was suddenly stood next to him at the bar, sweat at her hairline and soft lips with a cute smile as she spoke to him closely about how he was just sitting at the stool, not making the most of his first time in a bar with a fake ID, he felt his stomach twist. Maybe it was her scent, or the alcohol coursing through his veins, or the way she kept looking at him while she was dancing. Whatever it was, he knew he’d just moved into dangerous territory in his mind.

But she pulled at his hair and licked her lips and stood close so she could speak in his ear and he was easily convinced to finally get up and go dance with her.

Dancing wasn’t really a big deal to him. He wasn’t shy to dance. He honestly didn’t care all that much what people thought of him. He just didn’t want to get out there and dance while she was dancing like that. While she was looking at him in that way. Because he knew he wouldn’t be able to resist her. Something had slipped out of its normal position for Harry that night. He was thinking of his stepmom in very inappropriate ways and he was powerless to stop the indecent thoughts he had about her body and her lips and her voice. It was so wrong.

When he turned her around and put his hands on her hips he allowed his fingers to wander over her skin to the very spot he’d been watching each time she lifted her arms. But this time he pushed the material up to give the pads of his fingers access. And she didn’t stop him.

Her hair smelled good and when he spoke against her ear she got goosebumps. Fucking goosebumps from his voice in her ear.

But then the unthinkable happened and she pressed herself into his front. And luckily she was just off to the left a bit because had she been to the right another inch or so she’d have felt him. He was thick under his dark jeans and it was because of his stepmom.

Her skin and her lips and her hair and the way she smelled and reacted to him. But he had to stop. He backed away knowing that it was the smart move. Hating that it was the smart move.

He came down the shower drain imagining Y/n on her knees with his cock down her throat, gagging and urging him to go in deeper that night after the bar. He closed his eyes and yanked himself and he orgasmed so embarrassingly fast to the image of her. His stepmom. That was the first time he’d masturbated to Y/n’s image. And it felt dirty. It felt forbidden and disgusting.

But then he did it again the following evening in his bed. He was thankful for having his own room in the frat house. Stroking his cock as his thighs quivered and his head was thrown back into the pillow under him, imagining Y/n riding his cock and showing him what she liked had him gasping as he came all over himself.

He tried to move on and get things back to normal in his brain about her. The way they were before that night at the bar. But he couldn’t stop thinking about her. Part of that was because of how she responded to him, flirted with him. The way she was looking at him and how she danced with him. He knew he didn’t imagine it. She was into it. And now that he knew that… well, the result left Harry tugging one out to his stepmom every night thereafter.

.           .           .

The party was going to be big. Leonardo told Harry to invite everyone he wanted. And of course, he and Y/n invited their friends too.

There was a DJ, a catering staff with bartenders and lots of presents.

Y/n was helping with the setup. Friday was busy for her, the day before the party. She’d almost forgotten about Harry mentioning he’d be coming on Friday to stay the whole weekend. Almost.

In fact, she hadn’t forgotten at all. She tried pushing that memory down but it was still there, underneath everything. Her nerves were wild as she helped direct some of the landscapers and people bringing gifts in from the guests. Tables and chairs, and a dance floor laid near the area where the DJ would be set up. Speakers were placed all over the estate so music could be heard no matter where anyone was.

She was in sweat shorts and a tank top and tennis shoes with no makeup. She had wanted to shower and get freshened up a little at least. Before Harry arrived. Though, she wasn’t entirely sure he actually would come that evening as he said.

But then she laughed at herself worrying so much over how she looked to her stepson. A silly silly girl, she thought to herself. Who cares? Why should she care? She was doing all this for his birthday party anyway. And she was his stepmom.

Looking down at the placement of the dance floor tiles being installed she allowed her mind to drift to that night at the club. His warm skin, his deep voice. The way he handled her like he knew what he was doing… She hated that she had been allowing those kinds of thoughts to trickle in about him. Hated, hated that two days ago when she had sex with Leo it was Harry she was thinking about.

She felt like a nasty and disgusting woman. A pervert.

In the early afternoon, the landscapers had gone and the garden looked like it was ready to be filled in with hundreds of people ready to party. She was proud of the way it turned out. It all looked great.

But she was hungry. She’d eat then shower. Hopefully, before Harry arrived. If he arrived that evening.

The chef’s kitchen had a lovely granite island with unstained walnut and wide plank hardwood floors. The refrigerator was ridiculously large. Opening up the state-of-the-art appliance she peered inside trying to find something quick to eat. She planned on having cheese tortellini later on. Leo was out for the day and told her not to wait up. That he would be back late. Some conference or something. It wasn’t abnormal for him to be gone for hours or days. She enjoyed the quiet and loved to eat simple dishes when he wasn’t around. Things that she craved like macaroni and cheese, fish sticks, or cheesy tortellini, and a bottle of wine.

She settled on yogurt and a double serving of granola as she sat at the island. She just needed an in-between lunch and dinner snack to tide her over.

Just before she scooped her last bite into her mouth she heard footsteps and then his voice, “Anyone home?”

She quickly scrambled off her stool and stood up just as he entered the kitchen. His dark curls were perfectly placed on his head and he wore a colorful Hawaiian-style shirt and black jeans with leather Chelsea boots.

“Hi! Yeah, was just eating a snack. Uh, make yourself at home, Harry!” Her tone was a bit too perky and she cringed at how silly she sounded.

Harry smiled gently and nodded as he dropped his gaze to her legs and back up, “Yes ma’am. Just gonna take this up to my room first.” He lifted his duffle bag, “Looks really good out there,” gesturing with his thumb over his shoulder, “Looking forward to it.”

“Oh, so glad you like it. It was some work to get everything just right. The guys setting up were so great, though. There are still a few more things to finish up tomorrow but I think for now we’re on track. But um…” she walked to the sink to rinse her bowl out as she looked over her shoulder at Harry, “I’m, uh… just headed to take a shower, though. Haven’t had the chance yet today. So…” she trailed off her sentence. None of what she was saying mattered to him at all. She was sure of that.

Harry puffed out a quick little laugh, “Okay. Yeah. Well, I’ll be in my room.”

Her shower was delightful but her nerves weren’t soothed. She was wound up tight and now that her stepson was here in her house, alone with her… she closed her eyes to compose herself. A ridiculous woman. A dirty and perverted creep. Who thinks of their stepson in this way? It’s absolutely disgusting. Immoral. Depraved. Evil. But it had all begun with that night and the way he danced with her. Innocent. Until it wasn’t.

She stayed in her room for a while. Not sure how she should go about acting casually in front of Harry. After that night at the bar, how could she? They had crossed a line. She had crossed a line. She took responsibility for this whole mess in her mind. She was the one at fault. Harry was only 20. Well, 21 now. Technically his birthday was today.

Fuck! She’d forgotten to wish him happy birthday!

Pulling her leggings up and slipping on a t-shirt she huffed as she paced the room. Well, now she had to go and tell him and also apologize for the state she was in when he arrived and how she’d forgotten and…

Calm down. He probably doesn’t even care, Y/n.

Knocking at his cracked-open bedroom door she peeked in to see that Harry wasn’t in there. She looked down the hallway and for some strange reason she stepped into his room and her eyes landed on his laptop that was open.

Porn.

He was watching porn. Y/n let out a surprised laugh and shook her head. She was overstepping so many boundaries. She looked at the screen as she moved away, intending on leaving his bedroom and going to find him when her eyes landed on the title of the video he had up.

Stepmom and Stepson Share a Bed

Her pulse grew fast and her palms began to sweat. Of course, perhaps that meant nothing. Perhaps that was just something he was watching that he found hot and didn’t realize it was stepmom porn or something…

She backed herself out of the room quickly but when she felt his hands on her shoulders and his voice, that fucking voice that sounded like sex, “You okay? Nearly ran me over-“

But he stopped short, a sharp inhaled breath into his lungs cutting off his words. He looked at the bed where his laptop was open and realized what she’d seen. He’d been saving his favorite stepmom porn videos lately. This one was just up. He wasn’t actually watching it before he’d stepped out of the room. It had just been on the screen when he closed out the Word doc he was working on for an essay at school.

“Fuck.” He whispered and released her shoulders, “Y/n, I… look that was just-“

Y/n turned with wide eyes and held her hand up quickly, “It’s okay. I shouldn’t have come in here. I was looking for you to um… I was gonna wish you a happy birthday, and I… I’m the one that should be sorry. That…” she pointed toward his bed, “I shouldn’t have seen that.”

Harry was embarrassed. He felt like crawling under the bed and staying there til the day he died. Never to be seen or heard from again. He was so careless to leave that up like that.

He swallowed and ran his hands over his face and shook his head, “Oh my god. Fuck.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Y/n placed her hand on his forearm and pulled one of his arms down, “Look at me.”

Harry opened his eyes and looked at her like she asked, “No worries okay? That was just nothing. It’s just porn. Everyone looks at porn. It’s normal. Okay?”

“Watching stepmom porn is normal?”

Y/n swallowed. She didn’t think he’d directly come out and say that, “Well… I mean… sure. If there’s a category on Pornhub for it that means someone likes it. You’re not the only one.” She tried to laugh but it died in her throat when Harry clenched his jaw and tilted his head back to look up at the ceiling.

“And besides,” her fingers tightened over his arm, causing him to look back down at her, “it’s not like that’s about me anyway. Come on… it’s just porn. So don’t-“

“Of course, it’s about you, Y/n. Why else would I be interested in that kind of thing?”

She let go of his arm and she felt like she could faint. She grasped onto the door jamb and wobbled as she looked down at her feet to steady herself and then back up at Harry.

“Are you okay? Here, let’s sit.” Harry took her arm from the door jamb and slowly guided her to her sit down on his bed where he promptly shut his laptop and moved the forsaken thing away from them, hidden from view.

“I’m okay,” she put her hands up and blinked her eyes as she turned to look at Harry next to her on the bed. “I didn’t expect that is all. That it had anything to do with- I just…”

“But that night at the club. That was… well… haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. I’m sorry. I know that’s inappropriate.”

Y/n bit her bottom lip and nodded before taking a deep breath, “Yeah. I guess. Me too.”

“You too? What?”

She turned to look at his verdant crystal eyes, “I can’t stop thinking about it. And it is inappropriate. And I take all the blame. It was my fault that it even got as far as it did. I’m sorry, Harry.”

Harry shushed her and took her hand, “No. Don’t be sorry. This isn’t just on you. I’m an adult too, Y/n. This is on me just as much. So, I’m sorry. I feel like I probably pushed it that night. I was the one that touched you and made up that story about that guy.”

She recollected that night and the short conversation they had about the guy that was trying to dance with her when Harry had put his hand on her hip. The man was looking at her so she thought what he said was true. She hadn’t even questioned it, “You mean that man… that he wasn’t… you did…” she couldn’t finish her thought. It was. A lot. That revelation felt dense with just enough muscle to peel away some kind of layer of wool that had been placed securely over the situation in safety.

“Yeah. I’m so sorry, Y/n. I don’t know what got into me that night. I really didn’t mean for any of this- It’s… my fault. I started it. I’m really sorry.”

She felt like they were somewhat on even ground now. He’d done that. She wouldn’t absolve herself of blame. No, not at all. She was still the heavy in this situation. She wouldn’t allow herself to feel exonerated by his admission. She was seven years older and his stepmom. She was ultimately to blame.

“God, Harry. Please. I’m…” she paused. His gaze on hers was hard to break. His soft mint eyes made him appear so pure and blameless. But then his deep raspberry lips, darkly pigmented against his face were seductive. Harry was like a siren. An enchanter. He was beautiful.

“No. You’re… amazing and I’ve just gone too far. It’s okay. This is silly,” he laughed and disconnected their eye contact as he looked downward, “This is-“ he looked back up at her and felt his heart thrum hard in his ribs, “silly.” His last word, just a whisper. A word he didn’t believe.

She shook her head, keeping her eyes on his, “And you surely have other options anyway. It’s just a phase. I’m sure you’ve got plenty to pick from. The charmer you are,” she chuckled lightly trying to lighten the mood and suggest it was temporary. That he could be with any young college girl he wanted. Probably had someone lined up for his birthday party even.

Harry’s brows cinched together and he shook his head, “No. I don’t. You don’t know this about me but… I’m actually…” he sighed and looked upward not wanting to see her expression when he told her, “virgin.”

That was not what she expected. Not at all. First of all, Harry Styles was beautiful. He was a sight! A paragon on legs with a gorgeously calming voice and the sweetest disposition anyone could ever dream of. He was perfection if there ever was such a thing. His beauty went before him but his grace and kindness were what made him so appealing. So utterly attractive. How was it that this astonishingly amazing man, absolutely as nice as anyone could ever be, was a virgin? Not to mention he had his dad’s money at the helm. There was nothing about Harry that wouldn’t get him laid in an instant.

“Virgin? Seriously?” She stuttered, “Umm… but not that there’s anything wrong with that…” She almost didn’t believe him as she asked. They’d never discussed this of course, but in her mind, it was quite impossible that he had never had sex.

“It’s true. Yeah. S’embarrassing but I really want it with… not just anyone. I don’t know. It’s not like I haven’t done anything… but I’m not like I’m sleeping with whomever I can.”

Y/n nodded. She got it. As a female that was a conundrum she had as well.

Well, it was slightly different but the basics of why she didn’t just go and sleep with anyone was the same when she was his age. It was because she felt deeply about things. Wanted it to mean something. It didn’t always after she learned that others didn’t feel the same way she did. She learned that getting hurt was sometimes part of relationships. Part of sex. As sad as that was.

“Oh.” She smiled at him and spoke softly, “That’s how I used to feel too. Thought it should be special. But then when I thought it was going to be, the guy didn’t care so it turned out it was only special for me. I realized it didn’t really matter what I wanted. I can’t control what everyone around me wants.”

Harry felt his heart pinch at her words. That wasn’t fair. And that was exactly what had him so worried. That he would give it his all only to have the other person feel as if it was nothing important. Just a moment in time.

But it was a big moment in time. It should mean something. Both people should feel its presence and its significance.

They remained silent for a moment as Harry threaded his fingers in between Y/n’s and licked his lips, “Are we alone?”

She turned her head to look at the man. The whole scenario was unbelievable to her. They’d both admitted attraction and that they’d overstepped boundaries. They also both felt bad about it all. But what did that mean? Did that mean she should just stand up and tell him not to worry about it and not to bring it up ever again? Tell him she won’t say anything if he doesn’t say anything? Give him a hug and a pat on the back?

Yes. That is exactly what she should do.

Unhooking her fingers from his she leaned in and hugged him before standing up from his bed, “Your dad will be home late. So, it’s probably better if I go downstairs and do something to keep me busy. This,” she moved her fingers to point at him and then herself, “we can just chalk up to some bad timing and hormones or whatever. Don’t worry about it. I think it’ll be better for us to just pretend it never happened.”

Harry stood up abruptly, his height overtaking Y/n’s significantly with how close he stood, “Just like that? Just forget that we both said those things?”

She took a step back as she kept her eyes on his, “Yeah. Don’t you think that’s for the best? I mean, Harry… I’m your stepmom.”

Harry pulled his lips into his mouth and frowned as he put his hands on his hips and moved away from the bed. He walked toward his door and turned back, “You can forget it and pretend it never happened if you like. I won’t be, though. I’m not going to say anything but I’m not going to pretend this didn’t happen either.”

Her heart dropped. She hoped he’d just brush it all off and try to move on. That was the best way to go about all of this. It’s not like they could have some kind of affair anyway. He was too young and his dad was her husband. It would be crazy to do such a thing.

“I mean… what did you want here? I feel like moving on is the best thing for both of us.”

Harry breathed out an incredulous laugh and shook his head, “I don’t know. Honestly. Thought…” he looked down at his shoes, “No one needed to know. No one would know.”

“No one needed to know what?”

Harry lifted his gaze up to Y/n’s, “If we… kissed or… anything. It would be easy. Dad’s never home. And you’re so-“ he blinked his eyes and she watched as he honed in on the spot where her breasts were under her t-shirt. She hadn’t put a bra on before slipping the shirt on in her haste to wish him a happy birthday, “Kind and patient. Feel like that would be really nice.”

She felt like her jaw was on the floor. Felt like that would be really nice. She couldn’t argue that. It would be really nice. A man with a warm heart in her bed. Someone she could show what she wanted without worry that he’d be offended. A man that looked like Harry. Young and with all that stamina. She imagined that he probably would want it a lot, especially now that she knew he was a virgin. That he’s been so neglected and that the moment he got a taste of it he’d never want to stop…

She shook her head before she allowed her mind to go too far into that hole, “We can’t, Harry. You understand that right,” she bit her lip. She wanted to grab him by his hips and smear her mouth over his as she pushed him into his bed and had them reenact the stepmom and stepson share a bed porno he had up on his laptop.

Harry nodded, his face set in an unreadable expression, “Of course, Y/n. I wouldn’t push you to do anything you didn’t want. I’m sorry.”

She hated that he kept saying sorry. That he felt bad for any of this when it was on her as well, “Please, Harry. Stop saying you’re sorry. You’re not to blame. I just think we should keep level heads here. You’ve done nothing wrong.”

His breathing deepened so much that Y/n could see the way his chest rose and fell under his shirt. She noted his gaze taking her in, not just her eyes, but her lips and her neck, her hips where the shirt stopped and her leggings showed under, “Oh… Y/n…” he shook his head, “I’ve definitely not been innocent. If my porn history isn’t enough to apologize for then my dirty thoughts surely are. You’d certainly agree that I should be apologizing if you knew the sorts of things I fantasize about with you.”

Y/n looked down. She couldn’t take his saturating gaze and these admissions any longer, “I don’t know why you’re telling me this. It’s okay that it’s private and as long as it’s not acted on… you shouldn’t feel bad.”

“Of course.” Harry gestured toward the hallway as he looked at Y/n. There was nothing more to be said on the matter. Harry knew she was right.

She nodded as she exited his room and heard him close the door behind her as she stepped out into the hallway. All she wanted to do was to tell him happy birthday. But instead, she left confused and frustrated and far more guilty than she had been before. She had no idea how to navigate this. But she only knew that no one could know their secret.

.           .           .

The caterers arrived before everyone else to get things set up. Small little aluminum warmers lit to keep the food warm. The bar was set up with a washing station and glassware (none of that plastic stuff Leo had said). The sound equipment was tested. Everything was going to be amazing, Y/n thought. For Harry’s 21st birthday party, this was surely going to be a great time.

She hadn’t seen Harry after their encounter in his bedroom the day before. He’d been quiet the rest of the evening. He didn’t even come down to eat.

Leo arrived home just after midnight and today he was working a little, tying up loose ends for something Y/n didn’t bother to pay attention to. Her mind was elsewhere anyway. Her thoughts kept wandering to Harry. Was he okay? Certainly, he wouldn’t be too upset. They hadn’t even really done anything. And they shouldn’t! Plus he was so young and he would have plenty of time to find someone special. She couldn’t be that for him. Certainly not.

Just before she’d had the chance to run upstairs to her room to get her party outfit in order she caught a glimpse of Harry as he was leaving the kitchen. His dark curls were messy. He looked like he had just gotten up.

She laughed to herself. A typical 21-year-old. Sleeping half the day away so he could stay up late and party with his friends tonight. She felt like that was a good sign.

Her dress was modest and what she deemed appropriate. She had originally selected something different for the party, but after her talk with Harry the night before, she went a more conservative route. Perhaps he’d ignore her when he saw the other pretty girls his age that he knew at the party. She hoped there would be someone else that caught his eye. Someone that could make him forget all about whatever it was that happened between them.

She pulled her hair into a low bun, smoothing the bits that always tended to poke out from a sleek do. It was easy to keep her hair this way. And it was more mature too she felt. Rather than keeping her hair down in styled waves or curls, the low bun was a nod to her stage in life. The married woman with a stepson stage.

She decided to not wear perfume or lipstick either. She wanted to do anything she could to fade into the background for the party. She’d be running around anyway, at the beck and call of the people working the party should they need anything. She knew it was probably unnecessary as the people they’d hired were all professionals and some of the best in the industry. But she felt she would need to keep herself busy.

The first to arrive were Leo’s parents (Harry’s grandparents) and then Harry’s mom, Anne. Anne had been around a lot for the last few days helping Y/n get everything sorted. Y/n was actually quite fond of Anne. Harry’s mother was a saint. She loved that her relationship with Leo’s ex was so good.

“Where’s the birthday boy?” Anne smiled as she backed away from the hug Y/n had given her.

“Oh! I think he might still be getting ready. I believe he slept in late. Saw the back of his head about an hour ago and he appeared to be half asleep,” Y/n laughed.

As more of the guests arrived, Y/n noted the young women and men Harry had invited. Plenty of attractive and exciting college kids.

The music was started and drinks were being served but she still had not seen Harry. Nor Leo for that matter (though she wasn’t surprised to have not seen Leo – probably absorbed in his work).

Going inside and tiptoeing her way up toward Harry’s bedroom to urge him to come out and join his own party she found that his door was closed. She applied two knocks to the wood as she put her ear in close to hear anything.

When it was silent and the door didn’t open, she knocked again. Harder, “Harry? You in there? Party’s getting started without you!”

Suddenly the door was pulled open and before her was her stepson looking like he was ready to kill. Not kill in the way that was violent, but kill with his looks. Kill with the way he’d dressed and left half his buttons undone at the top, a sheer milky white shirt with cream embroidered flowers draping away from his chest and allowing peeks of his tattoos. Black, well-fitted jeans and black Chelsea boots. His signature cross necklace hung between his pecs.

“Wanted to be fashionably late. You know… birthday boy and all,” he raised his brows unamused at Y/n and she felt the condescension drip from his words, “After you… step mummy,” he gestured for her to lead the way.

She was stunned by his tiny attitude. It wasn’t much. He hadn’t been particularly rude but his tone and his cheek were new. He was normally very polite with her. Very sweet and all smiles.

She nodded as she began to head down the stairs, Harry behind her. The moment they walked out to the garden Harry headed in a direction away from her. Without a word. But that was good. He should go and have fun with his friends.

Y/n had invited Marla to the party, which she was thankful for. Marla kept her mind off the tall young man of the hour.

“I can never get over how fantastic this place is. And look at all this,” Marla waved her wine glass above her head as she gestured toward the decorations, “This looks magical! When I fall in love and get married, can I have my wedding here?”

“You have to find the right man first. Ryan’s not it.” They laughed together.

Y/n wasn’t nearly as busy as she thought she’d be. As she hoped she’d be. She drank a few glasses of wine and checked on the guests but Anne had most things under control as did the staff that were taking care of everything.

She kept wishing she had more to do because her eyes kept searching for Harry. She spotted him over and over again. He was drinking whisky, with his friends laughing, and of course, there was one girl he was talking to.

She scolded herself at the touch of jealousy she felt. The girl was Harry’s age. Lovely young thing. But when she saw just the two of them talking as Harry had a hand flat on the bench behind the girl she hated how close they were standing. How flirty he looked. She especially didn’t like that the girl would reach out for his buttons and pluck at them every so often.

But why should she be jealous? He was a 21-year-old guy and he was her stepson. It was quite silly to feel anything other than happiness for him.

The cherry on top was after Leo gave his speech and everyone toasted and then the DJ began to play house music. The dance floor was packed and Y/n watched on as Harry and the young girl danced together, much in the same way he’d danced with her two weeks prior. His lanky body moved behind hers, his hand at her hip, his face close to her ear as he said god-knows-what to her.

She wanted to go out and dance too. There was no reason for her to not dance. Just because Harry was out there, enjoying his time, she didn’t need to wallow at the edge and watch the fun.

“Let’s dance!” Y/n pulled Marla with her to the dance floor.

It was just like their normal Friday night outings and since the night before they didn’t get to go out because Y/n had been busy with the party setup, tonight would be girl’s night for her and Marla.

The two laughed and moved their bodies to the beat, holding their wine glasses as level as they could so it didn’t slosh out.

She was finally having fun. Finally felt the anxiety and the guilt melt away as she danced and drank a little more wine. She had been silly to be jealous or upset. There was no reason for any of that.

But then she saw his eyes on hers. He hadn’t been looking at her all night. She figured that was for the best. But now he was watching her as he danced with the girl in the white mini-dress. His gaze was cold. His face set in a glowering smirk as he spoke something to the girl. She watched as the young woman leaned her head back to look up at Harry and his lips nipped at the space just below her ear.

She felt she could vomit. It was too much. She thought she was okay but she didn’t want to see that. Didn’t want to watch as Harry kissed anyone else and looked at her with such disdain. Was he mad at her?

She excused herself to Marla and rushed into the big house, moving into the kitchen to set her glass down. There were people in the house. Chatting, laughing, and some even dancing inside.

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes as she leaned over the island and tried to calm her brain. What was she doing? What was wrong with her?

Warm hands covered the tops of her shoulders and the deep rasp of her stepson was in her ear before she could even open her eyes, “I need to talk to you.”

She jumped in surprise and turned around quickly as Harry ticked his head toward the stairs and he began heading toward them. She followed behind, moving up the steps with him and she assumed he would want to talk in the hallway or his room but he continued walking past his door and to the other side of the house toward her bedroom.

Without even a pause he opened her door and entered her room as if he owned it. As if it were his room.

She followed in behind him, her face set in confusion. She couldn’t know what he was going to say or what he wanted to talk about.

“Was offered a blowjob,” he blurted out as he paced. “From Leslie. She’s cute and I’m… anyway… I wanted to tell you,” he stopped and looked at Y/n, moving toward her, “in case you wanted to… maybe you’d changed your mind or-“ he ran a hand through his hair.

“What?” She was stunned, “You… why are you telling me?”

“Because I want… you, Y/n.” He said with finality.

Harry was stood close with his pink lips parted as he looked down at Y/n. He was serious. He was dead serious and she was surprised. The young girl was pretty and she wanted to give him a blowjob… “Me? What about… Leslie? She’s so cute and-“

“Not as cute as you. Ever since that night, I can’t stop thinking about you.” He cocked his head and smirked, “And I like this look,” Harry moved his hand to the material of her dress gently before letting his hand drop down to his side, “Perfect length so no one gets any ideas about you. A modest silhouette. Your hair falling out of this bun you tried to hold it in,” his hand moved upward again to push the hair off her shoulder that had indeed come undone from the bun.

“You must have had too much to drink. I’m not what you’re looking for-“

“You are. You are exactly what I’ve been looking for. And I’m not drunk, Y/n. Not even close.”

Her breaths deepened as Harry’s hand stayed at her neck where he’d pushed her hair. His thumb rubbed over her pulse point slowly. And he was suffocating, crippling her resolve. Making her question her sanity. She couldn’t allow this. Could she?

“Well, it doesn’t matter. I can’t. We… we can’t.”

Harry licked his lips, “We can actually because no one would know. Want it to be you. Want you to show me. I trust you.” He didn’t lose his composure as his palm moved upward and his thumb brushed the outer corner of her mouth.

She closed her eyes and allowed her mouth to part the slightest. She didn’t know what she was doing. Letting him stand so close. Letting him speak to her about this. Letting him touch her lips. Letting his words sink into her core.

“Harry…” she breathed out his name as she felt the pad of his thumb press over her bottom lip. Her eyes remained closed. This wasn’t happening. If she kept her eyes closed she wasn’t here and this wasn’t happening. It was just a fantasy.

The trouble was though, that it was happening. And even with her eyes closed she could feel him and how he was standing so close she could smell the whisky on his breath and feel his body heat next to hers. Feel his thumb push past her lips the slightest as her tongue poked out to taste the tiniest bit. Felt his hand grip her face and his smooth mouth on hers and his hand on her waist and his chest pressed to hers.

She forced her fingers into his hair and moaned into his mouth but then- in a sudden moment of clarity, she pushed at his chest and shook her head, “This is wrong. We can’t, Harry. You get that, right?”

Harry backed away and looked down at his feet, “I do. You don’t want me.”

She nearly blurted out to him that that was incorrect. That she did want him. That she’d fantasized about him far too often but it was unhealthy and it could only lead to disaster.

Instead, she stayed quiet. He needed to drop this. She needed to stop this. It had gone too far.

When he left her room she sat down on her bed. Now she’d gone and kissed him. Tasted his lips and the way he kissed her felt so real and so passionate. She’d missed that bit of passion. That sort of enthusiasm. It wasn’t something Leo gave her at all. She didn’t even know it was something she was missing. But Harry had woken something up in her. Ever since that night. And now the kiss had felt like she was beyond getting back to ignoring that need she’d buttoned up and pushed down. She wanted more. But that couldn’t happen.

She was surprised by Harry’s gall too. He was quite pushy, which she hadn’t expected of him. Harry, who was so gentle and thoughtful and sweet was really adamant about pursuing her.

Her tummy was still warm and filled with butterflies. He’d kissed her. And she wanted to take it further but she couldn’t. That was out of the question.

.           .           .

When most of the guests had gone and the house grew quiet Y/n sat outside under the twinkle lights. She’d turn them off before going in and calling it a night but she wanted a few moments of peace with the last bit of the bottle of wine she’d worked her way through after Harry had gone and scrambled her good sense.

Good sense. What a laugh. As if she had any good sense after that night at the bar. It should have never gotten as far as it had.

Y/n was also sitting outside in hopes of making sure Leslie left before she went back in. Or at least gave Harry enough time to get his blowjob or whatever it was that was going on in his bedroom.

Because Y/n was well aware that Harry had her in there. He made a show of it in fact.

When she’d gotten back outside after calming herself from the kiss, Harry had Leslie against the side of the house with his tongue down her throat. And as much as she tried to ignore that and pretend she wasn’t bothered by it, she was bothered. It hurt her feelings but she shouldn’t feel hurt. Harry should be doing things with girls his age and losing his virginity to anyone that wasn’t his stepmom.

But she kept looking over at them and when she caught Harry gazing back at her as he kissed Leslie she could almost feel her hair singe in anger. He was doing it on purpose. To make Y/n jealous.

And before he brought her into the house he casually introduced Leslie to her and then leaned in to whisper to Y/n with his whisky breath, “Last chance.”

So, not only was she a little hurt she was a little pissed. Because he was being downright bratty with it.

Half of her hoped that Leslie would take his virginity and he’d get it out of his system and that would be that.

The other part of her, the depraved, nonsensical evil bit that she kept pushed deep deep down away from anyone, wanted to make him pay for being a little jerk to her. She imagined spanking him even, which was ridiculous because he was so much larger than she was. As if he’d somehow fit over her lap and bare his ass to her for a spanking. She laughed at her thoughts but they didn’t end there.

The more wine that wound its way into her bloodstream the filthier her fantasies got. He’d grow hard after she punished him and then she’d show him what a real blowjob was like. Make him forget all about Leslie. She’d let him feel her throat on him but wouldn’t allow him to come. Instead, then she’d pull him down by his hair between her legs and guide him over her, giving him specific instructions for cunnilingus. And he’d keep licking at her and begging for more of her even after she’d come. He wouldn’t want to stop tasting her but then she’d tell him to stop – that only good boys deserve more.

Of course, the fantasy ends with him begging her to take his virginity and then making him eat his come from her pussy since he came too fast, like the virgin he is.

Depraved. But god was she turned on just thinking about it. She bet he’d like all that too.

Plucking her bottle of wine up she flicked the lights off and went into the house. No sense in staying outside and hoping Harry was quiet enough when she went inside. Plus she was quite tipsy and just needed to be put to bed.

Putting the bottle down on the counter she heard Leo sitting in the living room on a call.

It was nearly 2 am so she was surprised he was chatting with anyone but she could tell it was something for work. Plans for a business trip.

Instead of waiting and talking to him, she made her way up to her bedroom. She slowly passed Harry’s room and noticed that there was a light on but no noises to be heard, thankfully.

And she wasn’t jealous. Of course, she wasn’t. What was there to be jealous of?

After a warm shower and slathering her body in lotion, she opened her ensuite bathroom door and stopped dead in her tracks.

“What are you doing in here?”

Harry was lying on her bed, sprawled out on top of her comforter wearing the clothes he wore at his party minus his boots.

Harry lifted his head and snorted a laugh, “Wanted to say g’night to my stepmom. But then I laid on your bed,” Y/n could hear the slur in his speech and saw the way his eyes floated in his sockets as he looked at her, “and it’s so comfortable.” He pressed his palms down and moaned at the feel before plopping his head back onto her stack of feather pillows.

She stood over him and placed her hands at her hips. She was thankful she’d put on her robe before stepping out of her room. Half the time she opted to walk around her bedroom naked.

“Well, goodnight, then Harry. It’s time for you to go back to your room.”

Harry squeezed his eyes closed and the grin on his mouth widened as he spoke, “Mmm… but this feels so good. S’cozy right here.”

Y/n sat at the end of the bed and sighed. He was clearly drunk. Earlier he hadn’t been when she kissed him. Now, he was very clearly inebriated.

“Your bed is cozy too, though. You should go back to your room. Get some rest.”

Harry propped himself up by his elbows and planted his eyes on hers, “You’ve been in my bed? When?”

Shaking her head and laughing at the absurdity of this whole scenario she spoke, “I know your bed is comfortable because I helped Leo pick out your new mattress. It’s the same one as this.” She patted the bed under her.

Harry nodded slowly and she noticed his gaze at her cleavage so she tightened her robe just as there was a knock at her door.

A gasp fell from her lips and she shoved Harry off the bed, whispering, “Under the bed! It’s your father!”

Harry huffed a laugh and put his hands up in surrender, “Yes, ma’am.”

She hushed him as he scooted himself under her bed and Y/n ran to her bathroom door, “Yes!”

The door opened and Leo stepped in, a suitcase left in the doorway, “I just wanted to let you know I’ve got a sudden meeting tomorrow late morning so I’ve got to take the 5:00 am out to Savannah.”

Putting the towel up to her hair to act as if she’d just gotten out of the shower (she sort of had) she walked across the room to him, “Really? When will you be back?”

“Day after tomorrow. It’s a morning meeting, then golf, then dinner. Then the next morning I have a flight that gets me back in LA at noon.”

She smiled and slid her arms over his shoulders to bring him in for a quick hug and he caught her off guard by kissing her cheek and squeezing her back before pulling away, “Car’s outside waiting,” he ticked his head toward the door, “Tell Harry when he emerges tomorrow for me, will ya?”

When she shut her door and turned toward her bed she let out a breath of relief. She was glad Harry stayed quiet. But then she realized as she lifted her bed skirt that he’d fallen asleep down there.

Rolling her eyes she contemplated what to do. Leave him there? Wake him and help him back to his room? She really didn’t want to deal with getting him into his bedroom. Nor did she want to deal with a drunk Harry by waking him up. But ultimately her guilt wouldn’t let her leave him there on the floor. He deserved to sleep in a bed.

“Harry… come on… wake up. Leo’s gone,” she pushed at his arm gently, “Harry…” she said tunefully, elongating the yyyyyy at the end of his name.

Pulling at his arm she got him part of the way out from under her bed and lifted his arm up, “Come on… wake up,” she lightly patted his face and that seemed to do it.

Harry’s eyes opened up and landed on hers. Sparkling and green and soft. And drunk.

“Let’s get you up. Come on. Time for bed.” She helped him sit up and tucked herself under his arm and began to stand to help him upward. But he was dead weight.

“Can I please stay with you? Please, Y/n? Your bed is so soft.”

She looked at him as he spoke and she realized he was not going to make it to his room. He’d have to sleep on her bed.

But that was fine. She’d just put him in her bed and then go sleep in any of the other guest rooms. It was better than letting him sleep on the floor or attempting to walk him to his bedroom.

“You can sleep in my bed. That’s fine. Can you lift up with me?”

Harry’s smile took over his features and his pink lips looked wet and soft. He was super cute when he was drunk.

“For real?” Harry raised an arm and steadied himself with the edge of the bed, the other side assisted by Y/n as he was pushed upward to his feet.

“There we go. Okay…” Y/n nudged him to sit and Harry’s full weight fell onto the bed and he laughed.

He immediately went to grab at his pant button and Y/n paused and put her hand on his shoulder, “Uh, just lie down. I’ll go and get you some water. Be right back.”

She was doing her best. Truly. She was quite tipsy herself and her bed had been calling before Harry showed up in her room. And now here she was traipsing across the massive home to get her stepson a glass of water. She figured he’d appreciate that when he woke up in the morning. And she had hoped that by the time she returned to her room, he’d be asleep and she could sneak out and go to the nearest guest bedroom and crash there. She was tired.

But when she returned to her room, Harry had successfully pulled his pants and sheer button-up shirt off and was left in nothing but his grey boxer briefs. And he was not asleep.

Placing the water next to the side of the bed he was on, which was where she’d normally be sleeping she noted, Harry stretched his arms behind his head and smiled, “Hop in.”

She shook her head and laughed as she pulled her charger from the wall and grabbed her cell phone, “No, Harry. That’s not a good idea,” she turned off the lamp on the far side of the room and began to walk toward the door.

He sat up quickly, “Wait. You said… You’re not staying with me?”

Y/n turned to look at him, handsome and messy.

And her stepson she reminded herself.

“I’ll just be next door. Think it’s best we’re not sleeping in the same bed, Harry. Just lie down and-“

“No. Please,” Harry tried to pull himself out of the bed but his motions were lethargic and clumsy, “want you here. Just… stay with me. Please. I swear no funny business.”

She sighed and began to shake her head and repeat herself but when Harry started to place his long legs down onto the floor she rushed back to him so he wouldn’t hurt himself. That was her logic anyway. She didn’t want him to fall or crack his skull open.

Steadying him by his arms she pushed him back toward the bed, “Stay. You’ll hurt yourself.”

Harry hummed and reached up to put his fingers in her hair, “I’ll stay if you stay. If you go to the guest room I’ll just follow you like a puppy dog, Y/n.” His words were watery and his gestures were clumsy.

She closed her eyes and groaned. She was so tired. So tired. And she just wanted to lie down. And she certainly couldn’t have Harry attempting to follow her to another room and hurt himself by falling down the stairs or something.

“Fine. But you just go to sleep. I’ll stay here with you but you have to promise me you’ll go to sleep and behave.” She pointed at him.

Harry’s exaggerated grin returned as he laid his head back onto the pillow and watched her cross the room to turn off the last lamp.

Fuck, she cursed to herself under her breath. She’d forgotten to put on pajamas. She was naked under her robe.

But okay. No problem. She’d just leave her robe on and it would be fine.

Climbing into bed, on the odd side, she stretched her limbs as she laid flat and closed her eyes. She was just so tired.

“Thank you. For staying. I promise I’ll behave.”

.           .           .

Y/n’s alarm woke her up and she groaned and reached over to turn it off but instead, her palm found a bare, solid chest. She popped her eyes open and the events of the previous night had come rushing back. She let Harry sleep in her bed and she was reaching over toward where her phone normally was but she’d been on the opposite side of the bed.

Rolling over to press the alarm off she sighed as she snuggled back into her pillow. 6:45 am was too early to be up for a Sunday. She contemplated moving herself to a guest room since Harry was still asleep but her soft bed lulled her back into a deep sleep where her dreams were vivid and she found herself kissing Harry again. But this time, her dream took it further and she was on his lap and then they were in his bed. By any standards, it was a very good dream. A very good one.

So when she woke up for the second time that morning things were… different. Her head was not on her soft pillow and there was a hand on her bottom. She slowly came out of her easy dream state, still reeling from the kind of dream she’d just had of her stepson when she realized her cheek was smushed on Harry’s pec and it was Harry’s big palm on her bottom slowly, slowly, slowly moving down toward her thigh. He was awake.

Her dream-riddled brain mulled over what was happening. It was a slow rise but her awareness steadily stirred. Her robe had come undone and her thigh was over Harry’s. His chest was rising and falling gently and she realized her palm was over his heart, which she could feel thudding underneath. She had cuddled up to him like he was one of those body pillows.

It was nice. It felt soft and lazy and sweet to lie in her bed on a Sunday morning in the arms of a man. And the leftover remnants of her dream had her still feeling wound up.

Hesitantly, she moved her head to look upward and Harry’s hand halted when her gaze met his.

She could see him swallow and he spoke groggily, “Sorry. You were… I didn’t want to wake you.”

The way his sonorous voice reverberated from his chest against her skin and her shoulder made her meltier than she already was.

Her hand was still over his chest and she could feel his heart rate increase as he kept his eyes on hers, “It’s okay. Thank you for letting me sleep.” She was going to move. To get up and pull her robe securely around her body so he didn’t catch a glimpse of anything but she didn’t want to move. She wanted to bask in the heat of him for a little longer. To feel his fingers on her bare bottom for a few more moments. Perhaps to even feel him caressing her again. And maybe… just maybe…

She slid her palm up and scooted herself fully into his arms, her chest over his, and laid her head down against his shoulder, “Let’s just stay here a little longer. If that’s okay?”

Harry blinked his eyes and knew Y/n could feel the way his heart was lobbing around behind his ribs. His cock was already hard but she hadn’t figured that out yet and he didn’t want to scare her off because he did want to stay like that for longer. With her.

He pulled his arms around her, removing his hand from her bottom and bringing it up to wrap around her back, “That sounds perfect.” He was just glad she hadn’t moved too far up or her thigh would have come into contact with his erection and surely would have ruined the moment.

Y/n closed her eyes and indulged in the way his arms felt around her. Her bare hip was against his and it felt so salacious. So tender. Her breasts were pressed into his chest, with one of them uncovered and warm against his skin.

“Dad left for a meeting? On a Sunday?” Harry suddenly inquired. He had always been suspicious of his father’s frequent trips.

She nodded her head over his chest, “Yeah. Sometimes he has weekend meetings. It’s more like a golf outing than anything. Probably just some buddies getting together for some fun.”

“Hmm… You’re okay with him just heading out like that last minute?”

“Yeah. It’s normal. I’ve gotten used to it.”

He wasn’t sure that his father was a good husband to Y/n. He found it odd too that they had separate bedrooms. But he didn’t usually question it. However, this morning he was feeling soft toward her (well, soft emotionally… physically he was anything but soft) and wanted to protect her in some way.

Harry didn’t know how he was going to survive. His boner was only growing thicker and with the way she was wiggling over him, her thigh was nearly brushing against his –

Too late.

When she nudged at it, feeling him stiff against her thigh, she smiled to herself. She hadn’t looked down over his body but she half wondered if he was as turned on as she was. It was easier for her to hide what her dream had done to her and what being in his arms was causing to slip out from between her legs, but this pleased her.

“I’m sorry. That’s… I can’t help it.” Harry explained and Y/n lifted her head up and glanced down at where he was straining under his boxer briefs. It nearly startled her too. She hadn’t expected… that. And even though he was covered up with his underwear she understood that what he had going on there was… well she’d say he was a lucky guy and it was truly an outrage that there hadn’t been a lucky girl to try it out.

“Don’t apologize,” she looked back up at him and realized he’d been looking at her boob. The one not covered. And with the way she’d lifted herself upward to look down at him, her nipple was out for him to peek at.

She licked her lips and brought her hand down over his pec to lift herself further. Bot tits made their appearance and Harry groaned and looked away, “Sorry. Trying not to look.”

Gently putting her hand up to his jaw she turned his face to look at her, “Do you want to look?”

Harry’s eyes widened and he nodded, “Well, yeah. But I didn’t think you’d want me to.”

“You’ve seen breasts before right?” Y/n laughed and slid her thigh against his thickened cock, this time on purpose.

Harry kept nodding, “Yes. Quite a few. But just not yours.” His eyes danced over her nipples and back up to her eyes, almost to make sure it was okay.

She loved his deep, raspy morning voice. Loved how gentle and intimate the moment felt.

“Did you see Leslie’s breasts last night?” Y/n teased with a smile as she lowered herself down, her naked nipples pressing into his warm skin.

Shaking his head no he laughed, “Nah. She passed out. If you thought I was drunk last night, should have seen her. Nothing happened. Wouldn’t have been able to even if we wanted.”

When Y/n felt Harry’s hand timidly return to her low back and then ghost over her ass she let out a shaky breath. She couldn’t remove her eyes from his. He was so pretty and he deserved to be put out of his misery she thought. A bad idea, yes. But to hell with it.

Sliding her thigh further over him she pushed herself to straddle him and sat up over him. Biting her lip and looking down at his chest and smoothing her hands over the smattering of hair he had and the dark tattoos… he was sexy.

Harry couldn’t stop his eyes from taking her in. Her robe was draped over her sides but was open so he could see her breasts and her tummy, her belly button and he glanced back up at her and parted his lips as he risked moving his hands over her bottom. With the way she was looking at him and touching him, he felt the risk would be worth it.

“Squeeze a little,” she whispered as she put her hands over Harry’s and directed him to take a handful of her bottom in each palm. Harry swallowed hard and panted.

“Oh my god,” his words were spoken in a quiet breath as he relished in the feeling.

When she rocked her hips forward and dragged her core over his fabric-covered cock Harry gasped and his chest rose and fell in heavy breaths.

“I had a dream about you,” she spoke as she moved her hands back up his chest and to his face as she leaned over him, putting herself directly over his erection and ground herself over him, “It was really naughty. And I’m still worked up over it. Just tell me if you want me to stop,” her pussy was wetting the fabric of Harry’s crotch and he groaned before lifting his face upward and pressing his lips to hers. He definitely did not want her to stop.

The haste of the kiss was hectic and chaotic. Harry pushed the robe off her shoulders and she flung the thick cotton down onto the floor before placing her fingers into the band of his underwear, “Let’s take a look.”

She sat back and pulled his underwear down so his cock sprung out. She continued lowering the material until his balls were free and she moaned, “It’s really pretty. Can I suck you off?”

Harry brought a hand up to his arm and pinched his skin, wincing when he felt the sting. He wasn’t sure he was really awake. Not only was Y/n completely naked on top of him, she was licking her lips and asking if she could suck him off.

“Fuck. Please yes.”

“Do you like to beg, Harry?” She grinned as she crawled herself backward to put her face above his lovely cock.

“For you, I will.”

“Mmm… such a good boy,” she looked up at him as she licked along the underside of his shaft and Harry choked out a moan. His thighs were already quivering. She figured he wouldn’t last long but that was fine for what she had in mind.

Her mouth was watering so wetting him properly wasn’t too hard as her tongue slid over his hard prick. She dotted kisses along the way and looked up at his eyes and then down to his pretty dick.

Using her hand, a palm she licked and wetted, she gently massaged his balls as she finally pulled his tip into her mouth. She lowered over him as much as possible on the first go before bringing herself off of him, “Want you to come down my throat. Okay? Want to taste you.”

Harry’s face was twisted up in ecstasy already and she hadn’t done that much, “I’m gonna come too fast.” He whined.

Shaking her head and licking over his tip she whispered against his throbbing cock, “Be a good boy and come down my throat, Harry. It’s okay if you come fast. Just feel my mouth and my tongue on you and enjoy it. Can you do that for me?”

“Ffuck…” Harry threw his head back into the pillow as she drew him back into her mouth and began sucking, “M’gonna be your good boy. Yes.”

Harry’s voice was shaky and his groans were progressively louder as she took him deeper. He clutched the blankets tight as his stepmom fondled his balls and sucked on his cock.

He’d been given blow jobs before. But already this one was far and away the best he’d ever had. Y/n was sensual and confident and she knew what she was doing. When her eyes found his every few moments that was his favorite. Watching as she looked at him dreamily with his cock in her mouth was a picture that would be seared into his mind for all eternity. Better than porn. Because it was real.

“Ahh! Shit! M’coming, please!” Harry shouted and moaned as his hands finally found their place in her hair out of instinct.

He’d pressed on her just enough that her nose was pushed into his pubes and she felt his twitching prick beating and pumping as come gushed from his tip. He came a lot. She couldn’t breathe or move but she kept her jaw wide and gagged around him as he crammed himself further into her throat and he cursed and moaned and rolled his hips upward in orgasm.

When he’d finally drained himself of everything he had he loosened his grip on her hair and she pulled up, gasping and coughing.

Harry’s fucked out gaze was adorable, she thought. A small smile on his face with pink cheeks and a splotchy red chest from the exertion of his orgasm.

She leaned over him and grasped his jaw, causing his mouth to fall open as she spit down over his tongue, “Swallow.”

Harry gulped down her mix of saliva and his come before his pink lips curved up into a big smile, “Yes ma’am.”

Y/n chuckled and then kissed him before pushing herself upward to climb off but Harry caught her arm before she could get too far, “Wait. You don’t want me to like…”

“Of course I do. But only if you want to. Have you ever eaten anyone out before?”

Harry pushed himself up by his elbows and nodded, “Yeah. Wouldn’t say I’m any good at it. Not sure I could make you come.”

There was a thrill that filed down her spine and to her toes. She didn’t need to come. She just loved how it felt to have someone with their face between her legs. It had been a while. Leo didn’t often give her cunnilingus.

“But do you want to?” She asked pointedly. She wouldn’t dream of having him do something he didn’t like.

“Fuck yes. Just show me what you like and I’ll do it.”

Harry released her wrist and she put her bottom onto the mattress and stuffed pillows behind her so she could sit up and watch. She loved the way Harry was watching her body and how dark his eyes were. He’d just orgasmed but she was confident he’d grow hard again soon. And then perhaps she could give him what he really wanted.

“Take your underwear off the rest of the way.”

Harry got up to his knees and nodded, “Yes ma’am.” A sly smirk on his lips at the new nickname he’d been using for her.

Y/n had never been a fan of being called ma’am. She felt she was too young to be a ma’am but when Harry did it in this context, it got her blood pumping wildly through her veins.

When Harry’s boxer briefs were long gone she pulled at his wrist as she opened her legs up, “Start off just exploring. I’ll guide you if you want. Use your fingers, lips, tongue… and try to keep your eyes on mine.”

Harry licked his lips and knelt over her, his hands finding her outer thighs first and spreading her wider as he looked over her glistening pussy, “So wet. Is this for me?”

His question was a surprise to her. But it was definitely lined with something innocent. Almost as if he hadn’t expected her to be in the state she was in.

Nodding her head slowly and smiling she spoke, “All for you. That’s what you did to me and you haven’t even touched me yet.”

Harry’s dimples poked into his cheeks as he shyly smiled, “Just trying to be a good boy for you ma’am.”

He jutted his tongue out and licked upward from her seeping entrance to her clit and she moaned softly as she watched him. He kept his eyes on her pussy at first. She wanted him to look up at her but she allowed him a moment to get acquainted.

He used one of his hands to gently spread her labia and lick upward again, stopping at her clit and flicking it just the tiniest bit.

“God. You know where the clit is, don’t you? That’s really good, Harry.”

He finally looked back up at her as he mouthed over her pussy and sucked gently. She keened and smiled, “Yes! Keep doing that.”

So he did. He sucked and licked, giving special treatment to her clitoris and he moaned over her as he closed his eyes and lapped at her, and kissed his way around her cunt slowly.

“Finger me. Put two in. Like this,” she reached down to his hand and twisted so his palm was upward and then pulled on his pointer and middle finger, nudging the pads of his fingers to her entrance.

His long digits inside of her didn’t disappoint. He pressed them in and pulled out slowly as he continued lapping and sucking and she gasped into the room.

She looked down at him after the initial recovery of his fingers inside of her for the first time and he was already watching her. She slid a hand over her body, stopping at her breasts for a moment before pushing her fingers into his hair, “You’re so good for me, Harry. Just like that…” she was breathless.

Harry clamped his eyes closed at her praise and used his free hand to reach up and touch her left tit. He kneaded at her flesh and then circled the pads of his fingers over her nipple slowly and she mewled, “Come up here. Suck on my breasts,” she pulled at his hair a little to lift his face, “Keep your fingers inside of me.”

Harry did as she said, pumping his fingers into her as he moved up over her body and latched on to the breast he’d been fondling. He was a star pupil. His tongue laved sensually over her areola and he continued looking at her as he stuffed his fingers knuckles deep.

Sucking on her nipple and pulling away he moved to the other side and a muffled moan vibrated over her chest and she felt his cock against her thigh. He was aroused. Thick and full once again. She knew this would happen. Or at least she hoped it would.

Harry drew his tongue to the underside of her breast and sucked in tightly, pinching her skin and she gasped as she watched him work. He moved to her other side, repeating his gesture and bruising the underside of her boob with an intense suckle that had her flesh turning purple nearly instantly.

“Fuck, Harry.”

She had little need to guide him much. He was passionate enough and horny enough that everything he was doing was just right by her standards.

Harry popped off her nipple and looked up at his stepmom with eyes that brimmed with lust and need, “I want you so bad. Please…” his dark pink lips were wet and set in a pout as he pulled his brows together. He looked like he was in pain. But he didn’t cease fucking into her with his fingers.

Y/n carded her fingers into his hair and cooed at him, “What do you want, baby? Tell me.”

She was aware of what he wanted. But somehow she was getting off on having him tell her and ask and beg with his big puppy dog eyes and pouty lips.

Harry’s hips dipped down so his prick sat in the spot right next to her pussy. She was wet all over and there was a nice little bit of glid for Harry right there as he removed his fingers from her cunt and pushed them into his mouth. He was holding himself over her with one arm as he licked her essence from his digits before pulling them out to steady himself with both arms, “You. Want to… be with you. I’m so hard again.”

She knew what he wanted. And maybe it was the haze of the dream she’d had or a sudden lack of inhibition on her part, but she wanted the same thing. And his pretty cock would feel nice wrenching into her insides and poking deeply into the viscera.

Y/n nudged at him to move back so she could sit up further, “Are you sure? Because that means you won’t be a virgin anymore. I don’t want to have you regret anything.”

Harry shook his head, “I don’t care about being a virgin. The stigma. Never mattered. But,” he put his palm over the top of her thigh and looked at her with hooded eyes, “I know you’ll show me how good it is. I trust you. Only if you want me.”

The sting of warmth shrouded her neck and then her heart. He was sweet and he was convincing.

Nodding her head she put her palm over his cheek and smiled, “I do want you. And I trust you too. Which means this has to stay between us. No one can know.”

Harry nodded. The tiny bit of scruff on his face scratched at her skin as he turned to kiss her palm and grasp her wrist in his hand, “Then, please. Just tell me what to do and how you want it. I’ll be so good for you.”

Intertwining their fingers, Y/n pulled at him to give him a soft kiss. Wet. Trembling. They both were. This was either the biggest mistake of their lives or the beginning of an extraordinary secret. They both knew it. It would change everything. It already had. They’d already given in.

Whispering as she scraped his scalp and dotted kisses at the edge of his mouth, “Do you want a condom? Will that make you feel better? I can’t get pregnant so that’s not an issue and everything else is good in that regard. Up to you.”

Y/n always wore condoms with Leo, at his insistence. Because of their agreement. An open marriage if you will. But with Harry, she’d forego the barrier knowing he was a virgin.

“Do you want me to wear one? I do have some that I’ve never used,” he laughed as he spoke the word used.

“I’d like to feel you just like this,” she lowered her hand to his throbbing shaft and inhaled sharply at how warm and thick he was in her hand, “If that’s okay.”

Harry closed his eyes and nodded, “More than okay.”

“Good. Now. When you fantasize about having sex. What position are you in the most?” Y/n wanted to have him start off with what he fantasized about. She knew he’d like any position, most men did.

The edge of Harry’s mouth quirked up as he breathed out a laugh, “Just… all of them. But, normally I’m on top,” he swallowed.

“That’s good. Let’s start there.” She lay back and spread her legs, gently pulling at him to follow.

Harry put himself between her thighs and brought his palms down to the mattress on either side of her shoulders.

“Push your hips down and line up over me,” She took her hand and guided him so that his heavy cock was slipping through her labia, getting coated in her slick, “Yes, now, move back and forth and just feel how wet I am like this. How it’s getting all over you before you even need to push inside. Feels good right?” Harry’s mouth was dropped open and he nodded, “Yes.”

“Mmm… feels good to me too. When you do that, your tip is hitting my clit. See?” She looked down between their bodies, urging Harry to do the same.

He groaned as he continued gliding through her wet pussy lips, “Fuck. So pretty.”

The sound alone was sexy. Her pussy was really wet and the noise that his dick caused with each pass through her folds was pornographic.

“We’re pretty together, aren’t we?”

He nodded and moaned, moving himself a little faster.

“Such a good boy. Now, I want you to kiss me. Keep your mouth on mine and then when you’re ready, put your delicious cock inside of me. Okay?”

Another moan fell from his lips as he lowered himself to kiss her mouth. Y/n licked over his lips and Harry opened up and used his tongue against hers as he slowly pushed his engorged dick up and down, nudging her clit on each upward thrust. His mouth was watering as he got himself into position, putting his knees down to steady himself and rearing back to align his pink tip with her puffy, wet entrance.

Never removing his lips from hers as he continued kissing her and sipping at her tongue he dipped gently into her. First, his wide head barely smoothed into her until he was met with resistance from the small muscle of her vaginal opening.

She could feel him hesitate, knowing he wasn’t sure if it was too much. She smiled into the kiss and spoke, “Just push. It’s like that on purpose. A little tight on the first go but once you’re in there it’s so good. You’re just a little thick so this is gonna be normal for you. Gotta just press in past my tight opening.”

The whimper that fell from his mouth before he pushed his lips back to hers made her head spin. But what really got her was when he did as she said and pushed in through her muscle and slid himself in half way.

They both gasped, parting from the kiss. There it was. He was inside of her. He moaned into her mouth as he pulled back so his tip was pulled out and then reentered, pushing past that tight muscle again as he licked into her mouth.

It was good. She knew it would feel good. His hard cock was heavy and thick and as he pressed himself in until he couldn’t push any further she gasped at how deep he was.

Harry was on a different plane of existence in that moment. He’d given his virginity to the hottest woman he’d ever met and now he was allowed to fuck her. She’d given him permission and he’d given her permission and his dick had never ever felt so good.

He’d had his cock sucked and he’d used toys with lube that mimicked pussy, but this was… warm and real. And it smelled like her and his mouth still tasted like her and she was moaning as he moved into her. She was enjoying it too. And that… that was the best part.

He continued moving his mouth over hers as he thrust his way into her as deep as he could get until his balls were pressed into her bum. He was more than thankful that he’d already come so he could last a bit longer. He’d still come embarrassingly fast, he was sure, but now he had a little advantage. Instead of three minutes, possibly ten? He hoped. At minimum. Because he didn’t want this feeling to ever end. He’d fuck his stepmom for the rest of his life if it felt this way. They could just stay like this in her bed, slipping together and kissing and being connected.

A knock at the door and the voice of a female was heard from behind the wood.

Harry stopped his movements and Y/n grasped onto him with one hand to keep him still and put her finger up to her mouth, “Who’s there?”

“I’m Harry’s friend, Leslie. Sorry to bother you. I didn’t know where he went.”

Harry’s breaths were rapid as he stared down at the pretty woman he was inside of. He’d totally forgotten about Leslie.

“Uh… I think he left? Maybe? Not sure hon! I’m in the middle of something and…” she didn’t know how to get rid of the girl. She didn’t want to be rude but she was truly very much in the middle of something. Something very good. She was just thankful that the door was locked.

Harry slowly began thrusting again as he kept his eyes on Y/n’s, holding himself up over her.

“That’s okay! Sorry! I’ll be leaving. Just tell Harry I will talk to him later!”

The smirk on Harry’s face as he began to press in harder had Y/n’s tummy on fire, or perhaps it was his lengthy cock pushing into her guts, “Thank fuck she’s gone. In the middle of losing my virginity here,” he laughed as he rocked his hips sharply and Y/n grunted at the harsh thud.

“Oooh… fuuu….” Y/n moaned with a smile as he did it again, “So good like that. You gonna fuck me a little harder now? Be a good boy and make it hurt a little.”

Harry was a good listener. Had always been. This time was no different. He began to plunge into her with a dizzying drag, forceful and trenchant. Just like she liked. Especially when it was Harry doing it.

“Like that? You want it like that?” He punctuated his words with each rut of his hips.

“Yeah, just like that,” she scraped her nails over his back and keened as her body was rocked upward on each of his thrusts, “How do you feel? Tell me what it’s like.”

Harry’s hips stuttered as he brought the cadence down so he could speak, “Fuck, it’s good. So fucking nice,” he wanted to say more about how it felt. Wanted to tell her he could do this with her forever and that her pussy was the only one he’d want to fuck from now on (he was sure of that). Wanted to blurt out that she was so pretty and how perfect they looked together. But he held back with the understanding that his lust was clouding the things his heart was feeling at that moment.

“Tell me mmm… oh yes! Right there!” She closed her eyes and bit her lip to keep from shouting loudly when Harry ground into her just right, not sure if Leslie was still in the house or not, “Tell me what it feels like inside of me.”

Harry’s panted words were slow and deep, “Like I’m gonna come harder than I ever have. It’s so warm and smooth. Gripping me so tight. Never want it to stop…” his hips smacked against hers as he moved into her with a hungry force.

Her mouth was wide open as her breaths were being knocked out of her lungs and her tits swayed under him.

Harry looked down at his sexy stepmom with her lusty face and body and he lowered down to wrap his lips around hers. She brought her legs over his back and pushed at his bottom with her heels to urge him deeper.

Using his forearms to hold himself up he rolled his hips into her slowing down his pace to make it last. He wanted to feel her like this for a little longer. He knew he could come soon.

Wet squelches between their bodies where they were connected and sliding together with no barriers and tiny creeks from the mattress filled the room. The sound of illicit sex. The sound of something happening that was so wrong that it was good. So good.

Y/n could tell Harry was going to come as his breaths heaved and his thighs trembled against her each time he pushed in, “Harry… you feel so good filling me up. I want to come too,” her words were panted as Harry sliced into her deeply and stilled his hips as he looked down at her.

“Want you to come too. What do you need, Y/n?” Harry’s chest rose and fell quickly as he pushed his thumb over her cheekbone.

“Is it okay if I get on top and ride you how I like? Always come when I get on top.”

Harry smiled and licked into her mouth for a good moment, pulling at her lips and grinding into her further so she could feel him as deep as he could possibly go before, pulling back and gently bringing her thighs down as she placed her feet flat onto the mattress.

Y/n sat up and ogled Harry’s body as he turned and moved to his side. She crawled over him, pushing him down to his back, and sat over her knees between his legs. She brushed her palms up his sturdy thighs up to his hips, never touching his throbbing prick before leaning over him and kissing his right thigh upward to the apex of his thigh and crotch, careful to leave him wanting. Repeating the same worship on his left thigh but taking a little time over the tiger tattoo. She looked up at him as she licked over the ink and then continued kissing her way up, devastatingly close to where he needed her. So close.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, Harry. All of you,” she brushed her hands up over his laurels and to the butterfly that was rising and falling with his breath, “I’m surprised you haven’t found someone special already.” She praised. As she lowered her lips to his belly button he felt her hair ghost over his cock and whimpered.

Y/n smiled into his skin as she grazed her teeth gently upward to the butterfly licked around the lines before dotting hot kisses over his pecs, “Please… please…”

Raising her face and looking up at her stepson, “Please? What is it, baby? What do you need?” Her smirk was devious. Harry loved it. He fucking loved every single thing she was doing.

“Wanna feel you on top. Gonna burst.”

Lowering her lips back to his pecs she sucked a nipple passed her lips and nipped. Harry threw his head back into the pillow and coughed out a loud groan, “Ask me nicely. Like a good boy. You’ll get anything you want from me if you’re good, Harry.” Her words were breathed out over his skin and the spattering of chest hair. Her lips made their way up to the swallows.

“Please, ma’am. I want to feel you on top. If you… ffuck… please.”

Her grin did not disappear as she licked and pecked her way up to his neck, “I’m dripping for you, Harry. Such a sweet boy with such a big cock for me to play with. Isn’t that right?”

Harry was going to lose it. This was his fantasy. No. It was better than anything he imagined. Y/n was better. He loved being put in his place because most of the time no one ever challenged him. Or made him feel this way.

“Y…yes. Just for you.”

Y/n sat up and straddled him, placing her knees down on the mattress to the sides of his hips. Finally. She placed her messy cunt over his shaft and slid herself up toward his frenulum and down toward his base, “Just for me. That’s right. Gonna let me play with your cock and fuck myself on it and make myself come, yeah?”

Harry nodded frantically and placed his palms on her hips as she leaned forward and placed her hands over his pecs, “When I start to ride you I’m gonna go slow, up and down like this,” she demonstrated by repeating the motion of her hips, tilting her pelvis down and letting her clit drive up and down over him as she panted, “so I can keep my clit in contact with your pelvis and I’m gonna come pretty fast. I need you to let me come before you do. And if you want you can come inside of me. That’s up to you. Just let me know what you want.”

Harry nodded, “It’s okay if I come inside of you?”

“Yes, it is. Would love it if you did but it’s your choice in the end. Can come in my mouth again if you want, or my tits. Whatever you like.”

“Inside of you, please. That’s what I want.”

“Mmm… such a good boy,” she tilted herself down so her breasts ghosted over his chest as she kissed him softly, lips moving with his and small sips of tongue before she slowly sunk down over him. That same mouthwatering initial push of his wide tip into her opening snapped and then spread her apart, “Hhharry! Fuck your dick is so fucking good!”

He couldn’t speak. It was so intense. His fingers gripped her hips as she shifted over him slowly. Her nails pinched into the flesh over his muscled pectorals and he felt his balls tighten. Her moans and pretty mouth with her tongue peeking out had him leaking steadily with pre cum, “I’m trying…” he gritted his teeth and closed his eyes. Her tits swayed as she rode him and the way she felt on him had him tipping too fast, “Fuck… Want you to come first…”

She cooed and slowed her hips, sitting upright and changing the position of him inside of her. Deeper yet as she leaned back gently and looked down to where his cock was buried into her.

Harry chanced a peek, not wanting to miss it, and he was not ready for the sight. He groaned and brought one hand from her hip to her clit and then looked up at her before focusing back on the way his cock spread her pussy lips as he thumbed over her clit.

“My sweet boy. Just hang on. This feels so perfect. Just want to soak it in with you.” She lowered her hand over his fingers where he was circling over her button and she hissed, “Gonna make me come so hard Harry,” she swayed her hips back and forth, keeping herself upright so they could enjoy the lurid show of their connected bodies.

Currents of hot arousal coursed through her body as she clenched over him and felt his cock nudging her cervix. It was a tight fit but it had her body leaning into an orgasm.

She leaned back forward, Harry’s fingers pushed away as he placed his hand back onto her hip and she slid up and down, dragging her clit into his pelvis and her gasps and fluttering walls signaled to Harry she was coming.

He closed his eyes and felt sweat at his temple as he felt her squeezing and pulsing as she moaned his name and he felt her thighs shaking, “Yes… yes! Harry! I need you… need this… Hhaaarry… fuck! Fffuck!”

The mattress moved and creaked under Harry’s back as his stepmom got off on his cock and Harry was certain he was already filling her up with gushes of his pre-come. He was doing his best but he’d never experienced a cunt squeezing around him in orgasm. It was witchcraft and he was obsessed. He’d never be the same.

“Come! Harry, come inside of me baby…” she moaned as she continued rocking over him, everything slick and smooth between them.

Harry choked out the loudest moan and he was so far gone he couldn’t be bothered to care how vocal it was. He didn't care if anyone heard it. He was coming and his sight dimmed as he pumped into his stepmom’s pussy as she milked him with her spasming muscle. Together their moans were the music of relief.

Y/n could feel him throbbing and pulsing inside of her as he released his sperm into her aching and slippery inner tissues. He was punching into her so deep from below her it made her quiver in euphoric pain. She leaned over him and attached their mouths as he finished himself inside of her. She grasped his head on each side, her fingers in his thick hair to keep his head tilted up so their lips could move together.

He'd come undone completely. Tears pricked at his eyes and slid down his cheeks as he whined into her mouth and attempted to kiss her in return. He moved his hands to her ass and pressed her down as he lifted his hips so he could burrow in deep causing her to gasp and then squeak at the punishing plunge.

“Fuck, Harry!”

They were both shivering and heaving and kissing with saliva-covered lips and moans and wildly beating hearts.

When he’d calmed he sucked in a sharp breath as she collapsed over him and snuggled her face into his neck. They were sweaty and sticky and hot but it felt precious and perfect.

Harry closed his eyes and basked in the way Y/n felt on top of him, her warm breath at his neck, her wet pussy soothing his softening cock as his heart calmed. He dragged his hands up from her bottom to her back and rubbed along her spine, the pads of his fingers slipping through the layer of sweat that had formed.

He felt her lips pucker at his neck and then her nose push upward until her lips were at his jaw and then she pushed up to look down at him.

“Are you okay?”

Harry couldn’t imagine not being okay as long as he was getting fucked like that. But the issue was that Y/n was not just some girl he could date and then fall in love with. There would be no possibility of them being together. In fact, he was unsure that this would ever happen again and that had his heart sinking before he could even answer her.

She noticed the look of unease over his features and she swiped at his cheeks with her thumbs, “Hey… what’s wrong? I’m sorry, was that-“

“No. That was everything I ever wanted it to be. It was perfect, Y/n. I’m… fine. I’m okay. Just thinking.”

She nodded as she moved herself off of him and lay on her side to talk to him. He followed her and rolled to his side, his hands not leaving her hips, not yet ready to be rid of this moment.

“Tell me. What are you thinking about it? You can talk to me.” Her fingers brushed over his arms and up to his shoulders as she watched his glassy eyes closely.

Harry smiled sadly and shook his head, “It’s stupid. It’s not your problem.”

Y/n sighed and lifted her leg to drape her thigh over his, “Talk to me. Please. We just did something very risky and now we’re treading in dangerous water. Let’s keep open with each other. Okay? Because there’s no one else to talk to about this,” she grazed her knuckles along his cheekbone, “Pretty boy. Please talk to me.”

He took a deep breath as he closed his eyes to gather the thoughts brimming from his head.

“I don’t know how I’m ever gonna forget about this and move on.” He opened his eyes to look at her and slowly smoothed his palm over her side and to her breast, “I really like you. I’m feeling things that maybe I shouldn’t.”

Y/n nodded and swallowed. She loved the way his fingers ghosted over her nipple and how glassy his green eyes were, how gentle, “Me too.”

He blinked his eyes, all shiny eyelids and damp lashes covering and then revealing his pretty irises, “You do? Feel things?”

She grinned and closed her eyes. It felt like a lot. She wasn’t in love with him or anything and this had been a mistake for sure. An epic error. But she was feeling something. His warmth and his heart and his excitement. It transferred over to her veins and her skin and the roots of her hair and sparked a longing for something. When she opened her eyes again she licked her lips, “Yeah. I like you a lot. Wouldn’t have gotten this far if I didn’t.”

“Would you… consider doing it again? With me? Like,” he clenched his jaw and brought his hand up to her clavicle, “a thing just for us. Our secret?”

He was sure she’d say no.

Biting her lips she lifted herself and pulled Harry’s bottom arm under her head so she could draw in closer to him. She just wanted to be as close as possible. She brought her hand to lie flat over his heart and tilted her head back to look up at him, her thigh still braced over his hip. He moved his hand down her body to the back of her thigh as she adjusted herself in close.

“It’s so bad. What we’ve just done. It crosses a line. So many invisible lines,” she whispered as she traced her finger upward to his neck, “But… I guess I don’t care. Because I wanna keep doing it. I guess that makes me a terrible person.”

Stitching his brows together he frowned, “You’re a beautiful person, Y/n. So kind and smart,” he squeezed her hip and pulled her up to his mouth so he could kiss her. His stepmom, his lover, his paramour. He pulled back, his nose pressed to hers, “If you’re a terrible person then I’m right there with you. Let’s be terrible people together.”

They both laughed at Harry’s words and grinned widely.

It was ludicrous. A wild suggestion to continue their illicit affair. Of course, it would be easy. Too easy. That is as long as no one ever found out.

“Do I have you for the rest of the day?” Y/n tucked herself in closer as she asked.

“That you do. And I think there’s so much more for you to teach me. Might be a really late night for us.”

“Oh definitely, until the wee hours. So many things you need to learn before I let you leave.”

Next part: 2. No panties? | A Good Boy Masterlist

A/N: What did you think? I have so many ideas for this story but I didn't want it to get any longer than it already is. Would you guys be interested in seeing more? Let me know!

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[iliketangerines]

Maybe make a part two to that Raiden fic? Like he actually has the confidence to go fuck you. My size kink goes wild with that man. This Raiden Fic is now stuck in my head. I love your writing.

desperate for you pt. 2

a/n: i gotchu cuties, and thank god google translate exists.

pairing: lord raiden x afab!reader

warnings: nsfw (MDNI), overstimulation, pussy eating, fingerfucking, blowjobs, cum eating, cowgirl, mating press, slight somnophilia, full nelson, size kink, slight degradation kink, slight exhibition kink, breeding kink

Raiden can’t concentrate

not when you look so beautiful in that dress, it clings to your skin, accentuating your breasts and your curves, and he can see your legs in all their glory

thick thighs that he knows would just be plush and soft underneath his rough fingers

but, he’s also about to crush the glass in his hand because there’s a special forces soldier talking to you that’s nowhere near good enough for you

he’s touching your back, your arm, and his hand drifts back to your ass every so often, and you’re clearly giving him hints to back off, but he just keeps on persisting

Raiden should drag you away from this godforsaken work function at this grimy bar and strike the man down where he stands

even better, he should just bend you over in front of everyone and fuck you to show everyone that you’re his

he shakes off the mental image and approaches you two, glaring at the man, who gulps and gives a pathetic excuse to and fuck off

you sigh and give Raiden a shaky thanks, the soldier from earlier was getting a little touchy with you, and you weren’t really interested in him

Raiden just lets out a hum, afraid if he speaks he won’t be able to stop the lewd things he wants to say to you

he stays next to you as a 7 foot guard dog, shooting glares with anyone that dares to try and get any closer, and he lets you ramble on and on until the conversation takes a turn

you complain about how all the men you’ve been with have never been able to satisfy you, can’t even find the clit, and it’s so frustrating

your cheeks are warm and your head is feeling a little spinny, and you rest your head in your cheek as you bemoan how you’ve never cum before

Raiden feels his cock twitch in his pants, his heart pounding in his chest as he leans in close, and tells you he could satisfy you

you look up at him and your mouth gapes open, unsure if you had heard his proposition correctly, but Raiden stays firm in his question

your eyes glance up and down his form, and you stutter out a yes, and Raiden smiles and hooks your arm with his

he tells the bartender to put the drinks on Johnny Cage’s tab and drags you off outside to bring you to his personal quarters

the both of you disappear in a flash of lightning, and the second you both appear in his bedroom, he can’t keep his hands off of you

he’s enraptured by the way his hands engulf your soft thighs, and you’re just as pillowy as he imagined you to be as he squeezes at your breasts and your hips and your legs

you whimper as he manhandles you to lay on his bed, and he leans down to kiss you furiously, closing his eyes in bliss as he finally gets to kiss your plush lips

you’re so soft and pliable, and Raiden wants to stay like this forever, engulfed in your warmth and your plushness

but he has plans

he releases himself from your lips and kisses down your neck, sucking a hickey high into your neck, hoping that the next time that special forces soldier sees you, he won’t ever try to take what’s his again

he trails down and pulls your dress down to expose your breasts, and he nearly growls when he realizes you haven’t worn a bra

he tells you that you’re just begging to be fucked like this, wearing no bra like some common whore, and you whimper at his words

he latches onto your nipple, sucking and biting at the sensitive nub, and you cry out and grip onto Raiden’s white hair, tugging on his soft locks

he groans at the feeling and suckles on your nipples, bringing his hand up to pinch and pull at your other nipple

you let out little whines, and Raiden is drunk on your sweet sounds and bites a little harder to hear you yelp in pain and pleasure

he switches to your other nipple, lavishing it with the same attention as he licks and sucks on it

your hips buck up into his, and he groans as your thighs press into his aching cock

he squeezes your breast roughly in one hand and detaches himself from your chest to admire the way the fat of your chest spills in his hands

he just squeezes at your chest for a few seconds, and your face warms in embarrassment

he leaves a final kiss on each breast before ripping the dress off of you, and you gasp, whining that the dress was expensive

but all Raiden can focus on is the way you also have no panties on, you truly were a slut

he forces your thighs open and stares at your pussy, wetness dripping down onto the sheets of his bed, and your legs twitch as they try to close

you bring a hand down, a little embarrassed at the way he just stares at it, but he grabs onto your wrist and leans down to get face-to-face with your drooling cunt

he asks whether you were planning on going home with somebody tonight, and you turn your head away, burying it into your free arm

he smacks at your thigh with his large hand and tells you to answer your god, and you whimper and say yes, you were going to go home with somebody

Raiden’s vision slightly blurs at the edges as he imagines some subpar soldier bringing you home and not pleasing you right like you deserved to

he growls out that you’re such a slut, prancing around the bar without a bra or panties, and you whine at the words, begging him to do anything else besides stare at your pussy

he says that you’ll never be able to go home with anyone else again before diving into your pussy, large tongue pressing firmly into your puffy clit

your hips buck, and he lets go of your wrist to pin your hips down and force you to take the pleasure he’s giving you

you grip onto his hair as he sucks and nips at your clit, moaning at the taste of you and swearing that not even all the other elder gods could pull him away

you whine as your grip in his hair grows tighter, and when Raiden’s nose perfectly grinds into your clit as he fucks your pussy on his thick tongue, your back arches off the bed and you cum, your sweetness covering his face

Raiden moans and continues to lap at your pussy, trying to drink you in because he really could stay here forever with how your soft thighs tighten around his head and how sweet you taste on his tongue

you jerk away, clit sensitive, as he keeps on sucking on it and tears prick at the edges of your eyes as he slips in a long and thick finger into your dripping pussy

you whine, his fingers much thicker than yours, and grind into his face despite the overstimulation

Raiden continues to hum into your clit and fucks you slowly on one of his fingers, feeling your pussy spasm around it as you cum on his finger

you cry out as Raiden adds another finger, pressing his tongue into your clit as he fucks you slowly on his fingers, and you whine at the sound of your wet cunt filling the air

the stretch burns deliciously and the mix of pleasure and pain fills your mind as Raiden flicks your clit back and forth on his tongue and curls his fingers into your sweet spot

you can't think, hear, see anything except feel the way Raiden stretches you out on his thick fingers and hums around your clit

you tip over the edge and cry out Raiden’s name as he makes you cum for the third time

he retracts his fingers, licking your cum off them as he crawls back up and kisses you sweetly

he then moves you easily off the bed so that he’s standing, and you’re kneeling before him at his feet, and he files away the thought of you looking needy and pathetic at his feet

he tells you to take out his cock, and your hands tremble as you bring them up and pull his pants down

it springs from its confines, tip flushed and red as your lips part slightly and your eyes look up at him in slight fear at the size of him

Raiden tells you not to worry, that it’ll fit, and you wrap a hand around his shaft, hand barely able to connect at the edges as you pump him

you lick at the tip, and he groans and encourages you, telling you that you’re doing wonderful

you leave kisses on his cock, dragging your tongue on a sensitive vein on the underside of his cock, and Raiden’s hand shoots down to grip onto your hair

you continue to kiss his cock before finally kissing the tip of his flushed dick and taking just the tip into your mouth, tongue pressing into the slit and circling it

Raiden moans as you slowly bob your head up and down, lips stretching around the girth, and it’s better than anything he could’ve imagined

you take him deeper and deeper into your mouth, only able to take him halfway before his dick hits the back of your throat and you come off, gagging and coughing

he lets you cough and drags you up, having to lift you off the ground by your waist, and kisses you, tongue massaging against yours as he tastes himself on your tongue

you whine and Raiden falls back onto the bed and lays your cunt on top of his dick

he slides you back and forth on his dick, letting your wetness lube him as your hips jerk forward to try and get more friction

he loosens his grip on you, telling you to go at your pace and take him

you bite your lip and lift yourself up to align himself and slowly sink down on his tip

he groans as your pussy clenches tightly around his cock, struggling not to buck upward and slam you down, and you whine at the stretch

you bounce up and down lightly, thighs burning as you take more and more of him

Raiden can’t focus on anything but your desperate moans and the way he can see the bulge on your stomach grow as you sink further on his dick

but you stop prematurely, not fully bottomed-out, and you whine, saying you can’t

Raiden grunts and flips you over, staying inside of you, and throws your legs over his shoulders

you groan at the stretch of your legs, but grip tightly on his shoulders as thrusts in and out of you, sinking his cock further and further into you

he growls into your ear that he’ll make it fit, and your mind goes fuzzy at the thought

finally, with one final thrust, he fully bottoms out in you, and he groans at the feeling of your tightness fully enveloping his dick

tears drip down your face at the stretch, and he kisses them away, shallowly thrusting into you to let you adjust to his size

he looks down and sees the outline of his cock on your stomach, and his thrusts start growing deeper and faster until he’s fully fucking into you

you whine as he fully surrounds you and takes up every sense that you have

Raiden gets on his knees, lifting your hips up, and places his hands onto your hips and somehow gets faster

you’re nothing but a doll on the bed, drooling and whining as the new angle hits you deep inside and has your pussy clenching down on him

the sound of your moans, his grunts, and your wet cunt fills the room

Raiden barely feels like a god, he feels more like an animal as he watches how his cock fucks into you and how his large hands cover your hips

he reaches his thumb down and flicks at your clit,and you whine in response

he wants to stay like this forever, fucking into your tight wet cunt, but fuck he wants to cum deep inside of you, fill you with his seed

he wants to see you full, breed you with his godly seed, wants to see you round out, your breasts fill with milk, your thighs grow with fat

he imagines how soft you would be, how compliant and submissive and beautiful, how you would taste so sweet and how you would fall apart underneath his fingertips

he presses into your clit harder, telling you to cum for your god, and you moan at his words and clench down on his cock and cream all over his cock

he groans at the feeling of you and his thrusts grow erratic as he cums inside of you and fucks you through yours and his orgasm

his thrusts slow, and he stays inside of you, plugging his cum inside of you and keeping your hips raised up

you lay on the bed, panting and floating in a reality of pleasure and half-asleep from how fucked-out you are

Raiden lets you down after a few minutes, moving you so that his cock stays inside of you but so he can spoon you from behind

he runs his finger over your body as your breathing slows and you fall asleep

he falls asleep soon after, and when he wakes up, your pussy is dripping around him, and he’s hard again

you wake up to him fucking you, back flush to his plush chest and your legs hooked over his arms as he fucks deep into you

he cums deep inside of you again, and he goes down on you once again and laps at the mixture of yours and his cum

he has you cum on his fingers and tongue a few more times before helping you get out of the bed and into the bathroom

you brush your teeth, wash your face and body while he does the same, watching as the remnants of his cum drip down your legs

he wipes it away with a soft rag, pressing a kiss to the inside of your thigh, and gives you one of his shirts to wear

he teleports you two back to base, and you change into more acceptable clothes and head to work with a lovesick Raiden behind you

he holds onto your hands, admiring how his hand engulfs yours, and when Raiden sees the soldier from last night pale at the sight of the dark hickey on your neck and the way you cling to Raiden, Raiden lets a smug smirk overtake his face

he finally has you all to himself, and he’s never letting go

[envy-of-the-apple]

OKAY SO. u know. yandere-sin's monstober challenge right?? i knew i wanted to write gojo so i skimmed their list, saw "eldritch", remembered some of our conversations (or just your posts maybe) and. my brain was beamed forbidden awful celestial cosmic horror gojo knowledge form the heavens.

can you think of how profoundly unsexy regular human sex would be to anything that didn't have that kind of biological impulse?

gojo does not have a physical corporeal form so he doesn't really get the whole. insert tab a into slot b. that's utterly inane to him. you could describe sex to him and he's no more interested in it than he would be in ikea assembly instructions.

what he does find sexy is you. YOU. not your corporal form, but the "you" that lives inside it. "you" are what he wants to go inside of, lovemaking after his own fashion, revealing to you his true form on a plane of existence you can't perceive, becoming a part of you in some way

tldr; gojo wants to fuck your brain and cum inside it. he literally wants to fuck your grey matter, but like, cosmically. dw you'll be okay (tm)!

and gojo's true form is like. i once heard a joke about an engineer at a mathematics convention. the engineer was desperately confused at this math problem that started talking about 10-dimensional space.

he's like "how could you possibly visualize 10-dimensional space??"

and a mathematician next to him goes "just imagine n-dimensional space, and let n=10!"

and gojo fucking your brain (erotic) (sexual) (not clickbait) is basically that, him forcing your brain to perceive things your visual cortex literally doesn't know how to model. you SEE space in 10 dimensions now, an extra 7, but your brain doesn't know what you're seeing.

but dw gojo is there to guide you <3 that's what the mindfuck lovemaking is all about! he is fusing with you! moving parts aside to make new room, blazing new pathways, routing in a few extra optic nerves for more eyes to help you out. isn't he so nice??

there's more but this is already intensely long skhfglshdgsdg god why am i inspired for this i need to write my kinktober day 4 AAAAAAAAAA

*sighs and opens a03 to read CGT for the 24438th time*

(tw: death, death, even more death, unsafe sex , dark content, dead dove do not eat, just don’t read this)

ah so the Qu but like way worse

you know that saying “I wanna be in your heart” eldritch horror Gojo would take that literally as he rips open your chest cavity and tries to insert himself inside of you cuz you’re so perfect and amazing and he just needs to find out why he likes you so much!!! eventually he realizes that he finds nothing just a bunch of blood and this thing that would pump the blood around your (now) lifeless body so he just gives up and resurrects you (cuz what is death in front of a being who’ll never experience an end)

I think he would definitely try to change you to be in his image but then he’ll realize that he likes your humanity the most. Two arms two legs two eyes so useless and terrible design but he finds it so pathetically cuuuuuute. When your brain turns to mush from your activities he just restarts you again until eventually you just adapt to the horror fuck.

but like alternatively….would eldritch gojo even have a feeling of fucking?? I don’t think cosmic horror beings need to reproduce right? I think it’s more horrific if he thinks he’s doing YOU a favor by mindfucking you into oblivion cuz you’re human and below him and ya ofc u need this. not understanding that humans don’t rlly claw out eachothers brains to get down.

[lostfirefly]

Life Must Have It's Mysteries (Ch.12, The Epilogue)

I promise this is the last chapter of this story, but not the last story about Buggy and Catherine :) I can finally close all the tabs and audiobooks about Egyptian gods! Hah!

English is not my native language, errors may occur. As always, feel free to share your thoughts :) Masterlist is here.

Description: Our heroes came back home!

Warnings: Fun, fluff, inappropriate jokes, swearing (as always). Shitty shit again:).

Words: 2853

Taglist: @gingernut1314 (thank you for your idea!), @operationroots, @hey-august, @rorywritesjunk, @yujo-nishimura (I hope you still like it!)

The title is taken from “Life Must Have It's Mysteries” by Hans Zimmer (OST Inferno).

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10, Chapter 11

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

Buggy walked out of the bedroom into the living room, swaying and holding his head. No one was in the room, but he heard sounds coming from the kitchen. Shuffling his feet, he went to the sound and carefully opened the door. He leaned against the doorway, crossed his arms and watched Catherine rummage through the kitchen cabinets, humming, and danced slightly, glancing occasionally at the frying pan. He can't stop smiling while listening to one of the variations of his favorite song. 

“Milk, some eggs, a little flour,

Making breakfast for my clown.

Pancake one, pancake two, I'm cooking them for you.

Pancake three, pancake four, with every day I love you more.” 

“Fuck! Gotta admit, koalas look pretty damn good on your legs, cotton candy!” He plopped down on a chair. “Morning!” 

“Shit! You freaked me out!” Catherine carefully flipped a pancake with a spatula and smiled broadly. “Morning, my blue-haired love!” She immediately poured him a glass of water and pulled out a painkiller. “Here you go, after your binge in the bar last night, you need it more than me. How’s your head?” 

“If you lower your voice a tone and a half, it will be better.” He rested his head on the table. “You stole my t-shirt again.” 

“I like wearing your t-shirts, deal with it, clown.” Catherine ran up to Buggy, put the glass on the table and kissed him on the head. “Here, this is some extra medicine for you.” 

“No, no, no! Wait, wait, wait! Did not work. I need more help.” Buggy raised his head and extended his hand to her back.

“Liar!” Smack. “Stop grabbing my ass, jerk!” She slapped his hands. “Drink you water.” 

“Fine!” He exhaled sadly and took a sip. “Fuck! That’s what I need. You're my best!”

“You told me this yesterday when I dragged you home.” Catherine kissed his temple and went to pour him coffee. “You almost tore the bar apart last night. I'm surprised we weren't thrown out when you and Cabaji were completely drunk.”

“Oh, I’ll find out if he left with that pretty waitress yesterday.” He took another sip of water.

“He almost went home with you, Buggy! I understand he's your friend and I like Cabaji,  but sorry I don't want and don’t like experiments.” Catherine put the mug on the table and stroked his loose hair, trying not to laugh at his blank look. “Don’t you remember? Oh, I’ll tell you a funny story. I walked away literally for a minute, and when I was returning to you, I saw how drunk Cabaji grab you by the neck and was about to kiss you in your mouth. Don’t look at me like that. I don’t joke about such things. You were so, so close, my love!” She was actively gesticulating and started laughing, looking at his shocked face. “So! I rushed to stop this madness, at this moment the waitress approached you with your drinks, and I had to push Cabaji to her. And while he started passionately kissing the waitress, you climbed over the bar counter to get me the biggest bottle of wine. And when you climbed back up, you fell, almost broke the bottle, and then yelled all over the bar that I was the love of your life.” 

“And what about Cabaji?” Buggy looked at Catherine, stroking her back. 

“And your beloved friend continued to kiss the waitress. It seems to me that he didn’t understand what happened at all. I love you, but I'm sorry, I wouldn't want to kiss you after him.” 

“But it was fun, right?!” He took a sip of coffee with a proud look. “I'm surprised, by the way, that you got out of bed and walked on your own feet to the kitchen. If you know what I mean. That night was amazing. Fuck! I still hear your voice moaning my name loudly, feel the warmth of your hands and your hot kisses. Your legs don't hurt?” Buggy chuckled and sipped his coffee. “Shit, my head.” 

“First, you're disgusting, you know that?” Catherine came up behind him, stood on tiptoes and kissed him on the top of his head. “Can you think about anything else sometimes? Not just about sex, my ass or naked body? Second, It was hard to get out of your arms, my Buggy the Octopus, but I did it. You snored like a chainsaw, and you practically pressed me into the bed with your body. I had to push you away with my feet. But I thought you might be hun~. W-w-why are you staring at me?” 

“Right now, I'm thinking about your cool ass and envying koalas.” He sent his hand to the refrigerator for a beer.

“Oh, god!” Catherine rolled his eyes and pulled out a plate. “No beer, Buggy! Put it back in its place. You drank enough yesterday. You’ll drink later.” She glared at him, Buggy sighed heavily, set the bottle back down and reattached his hand. “Good boy! Hungry?”

“I'm always hungry, and I don't just mean food.” Buggy giggled idiotically. 

“Fuck you honestly!” Catherine came closer, lightly hit him on the head and smacked the top of his head. “How many pancakes do you want me to put on it?” 

“The more, the better, cotton candy.” He sent his hand to pour coffee for her. 

“God, you're just some bottomless black hole, Buggy the Clown!” Catherine put ten blue pancakes on his plate, poured maple syrup and sat down next to him. “See? Today's pancakes are the color of your beautiful hair.” 

Catherine ran her hand through his loose hair. Buggy’s hand brought her a cup of coffee and a plate. She watched him happily munch on the pancakes, sipping noisily on his coffee, and started stroking his hair. “Tasty?”

“Since the first time you cooked them for me, it tastes better and better every time!” He said with his mouth full and smacked her on her lips.

“Buggy! What are you doing? Your mouth is covered in butter and syrup.” She shrieked, grabbed a towel and wiped his lips. “Chew, wipe, and only then you can kiss me. I taught you this. Geez!” 

Catherine wiped her face, took one pancake from his plate and squinted her eyes. “So, when you go to that man's place, can I come with you?”

“I don't know, cotton candy.” Buggy stuck his fork into the pancakes. “Depends on how you act.”

Catherine sipped her coffee and sat on his lap, facing him and wrapping her legs around him. He threw down the fork and immediately hugged her around the waist.

“So am I being good enough, Buggy-sama?” She whispered in his ear.

“Fuck, I told you a million times, don't call me that!” Buggy clucked his tongue and pressed his torso against her stomach. “Have to admit I already like this morning, cotton candy!” 

“Yeah?” Catherine tilted her head and brushed her lips over his. 

“Oh, yeah!” Buggy slowly began to lower his hand to her leg. “I wish I could take your shirt off right now. You know, we need to introduce naked breakfasts. I don't know about you, but I love seeing you na~.”

“Shush, clown!!” Catherine covered his mouth with her palm. 

He removed her hand. “But why? Just don't talk to me about manners. We are sitting at home.” Buggy grinned and put his hand on her thigh. “And it doesn’t even bother me that your koalas are looking at me.” He whispered near her lips.

Catherine moaned slightly and reached her hand towards the table. “My little bear…”

“I’m listening, my Cathie-pie.” Buggy looked into her eyes and was about to kiss her. 

Catherine suddenly grabbed the pancake and shoved it into his mouth. “Eat your breakfast, asshole!” 

“Little shit!” He swallowed the food and looked at her with his round eyes, not knowing whether to kill her or not. “I thought we’re…”

“You're so easy to fool.” Catherine started laughing and looked into his upset eyes. “Are you kidding me? Wasn't the night enough for you? Oh, my sexy clown, you fucked me so, so hard that my legs hurt, I can't walk or talk. I have the best sex of my life with you, and I want more right now! Is that what you want to hear? Give me a break, for god’s sake!”  

“In my defense, I love hearing you moan my name loudly. Do you know how hard it is to stop at that moment?” Buggy looked at her proudly and winked. “And thanks for the compliment about the best sex. I knew you would like it since the moment we first met.”

“Blue-haired pervert!” Catherine squinted her eyes. “You couldn't know that. You pissed me off and wanted to leave me in the desert!!”

“But I didn't leave you!! How many times do I have to be reminded of that?”

“Shush, clown! I’m not talking to you!” Catherine wrapped her arms around his neck, pressed her cheek to his cheek and began to lightly shake him from side to side. “I.. love.. you!!” She squealed quietly and kissed him on the cheek. 

“You'll stun me, cotton candy! Why do I let you do this to me?” Buggy reached out and took the pancake.

Catherine heard him slurp and looked at him. “Are you fucking kidding me? You should be ashamed. I confess my love to you, and you’re just eating the food.”

He shrugged. “What? We’re not going to the bedroom, we’re not going to the sofa. I’m hungry.” He took another pancake and began to chew it without a trace of shame on his face. 

Catherine threw up her hands questioningly and rolled her eyes. “I hate you!”

“Oh, wait!” Buggy separated his hand and sent it towards the box near the microwave. The hand took out the chalk and flew to the fridge, on which hung a magnetic board with the inscription “Pie’s I hate you.” The hand drew the line and put the chalk back to the box.

“Seriously? Idiot. Have you switched from numbers to lines?” Catherine shook her head.

“Yes. You know, like in prisons. Draw along the line and then cross out the month.” Buggy took her hand and kissed it.

“You know better, a man who was in prison.” Catherine kissed him on his nose and went into the shower. 

After finishing breakfast, Buggy tried to sneak into the bathroom to see her naked, but was chased away by a washcloth. After the shower, Catherine followed him around the room, asking to take her with him. Buggy growled but agreed. She quickly dressed, and he led her somewhere along the streets of Cairo. Catherine didn’t stop talking the whole way, endlessly asking where they were going, who they were going to and how soon they would arrive. 

“Is there something I need to know?” She asked when they reached the brown door of the house in the center. 

“All you have to do is remain silent.” Buggy looked around and opened the door. 

They entered a large room filled with purple and red furniture decorated with monograms with drawings in the shape of the sun. It was a little dark and smoky inside. Catherine looked around and saw chairs with backs in the shape of lightning bolts, and glasses filled with booze in the shape of tusks on the table. Waitresses dressed in kimonos walked past her. 

“Buggy the Clown!” A low man’s voice was heard from the corner. “And his.. And who is this with you?”

“It's Cat~” 

“Oh, my god!” Catherine could not contain her surprise. She widened her eyes and pointed her finger at the approaching body. “He looks like a big blue onigiri!!” 

“Fuck, Catherine!” Buggy hissed though his teeth. 

“Oh, fuck off. I've never seen anything like this.” She extended her hand to the big fish. “Hello! I'm Catherine! His gir~” 

“God, this isn’t a joke? Buggy the Clown got himself into a relationship?” The fish said in surprise, straightening his kimono.

Catherine looked at Buggy. “Listen, why are they all surprised by this?”

“My guys said they saw you with some girl, but I thought you were just hiring a girl for one night. You know. A one-night stand whore. But as I can see she's not a... you know...not a clown’s whore.” 

“Hey, Jinbe!” Buggy barked. “Don't dare call her a whore!” He felt how Catherine squeezed his hand.

“I'm sorry, ma'am, I didn't mean to insult you. I was just surprised that he.. you know.. and you.. you know.” He came closer. “I'm a man of honor. Nice to meet you, young lady!” Jinbe extended his hand, took her hand and kissed it. 

“Oh, my God! How does he walk?!” Catherine pointed her finger at him and repeated his movement. 

“Jinbe, excuse us for a second!” Buggy took Catherine's hand and pulled her outside. “Wait here!”

“But why?” She asked with sadness in her voice. 

“Seriously?” Buggy rolled his eyes and groaned. “You just called him onigiri! Wait here!” 

“Stop! Won't he hurt you?” Catherine ran her hand over his shoulder. 

“Nooo, it's okay. I'll be back.” Buggy took her hand and was about to kisse it, but stopped. “Cathie-pie, wipe your hands, the fish kissed you after all.” 

Catherine watched as he closed the door behind him and sat down on the wide windowsill, crossing her legs in front of her. Buggy came out about an hour later. He looked at her and laughed. 

“What?” She asked, licking the spoon. “Come here! Try it! Coconut.” 

“Nothing.” He came closer to her. “I'm just glad that while I'm possibly between life and death, you're sitting here peacefully and enjoying some ice cream.”

“You drove me away yourself, and I was bored.” Catherine took the ice cream with a spoon and put it in his mouth. “So what? Did you manage to sell it?” 

Buggy began to nod, breaking into a smile. 

“Fuck you!” She jumped up onto the windowsill with her feet. “How much?” 

Buggy whispered in her ear. 

“Wha-a-a-t??” Catherine dropped the ice cream from her hands. “It's impossible! Are you kidding me? That's a lot of money! A lot more than I thought! Pinch me if you're kidding!” 

“No! 350 million, cotton candy!” He smirked. “I told him what it is and who it belongs to. In general, all these smart Egyptian things of yours. You should have seen his face at that moment. He said I'm lucky to have found you.” Realizing what was about to follow, Buggy spread his arms. 

Catherine stood silently and blinked at him. She clenched her hands into fists and began to squeal, stomping in place. She jumped from the windowsill onto Buggy, hugging him with her legs and arms. “Love.” Smack. “Love!” Smack. “Love, love, love you!!” Smack. Smack. Smack.

“Yes, yes. I love you too!” Buggy stroked her cheek. “Well, what does my Cathie-pie want now?” 

“Your Cathie-pie wants more ice cream!” Catherine kicked her legs. “Can you buy me another one? Blueberry flavor! No! Cucumber flavor! No! Lavender flavor!” Smack. Smack. 

“I can buy you all the ice cream in the world! You're my lucky star now!” 

“And wine! I also want to go to that cafe on the embankment. Can we go? Right now!” Catherine stroked his hair. 

“Let's go wherever you want, cotton candy! I’m yours a-a-a-ll day.” Buggy squinted his eyes. 

“Also, let's go to your favorite bar! My Buggy Bear needs to be rewarded too.” Catherine pecked him on his lips. “You'll drink, and I'll let you stare at pretty girls. And even let you flirt with the bartender.”

“Can I touch their asses? I used to do that.” He kissed her cheek. 

“Isn't it enough that you're doing it now? How do you even do it?” Catherine kissed him on the lips. Her kiss was deep and long, she tried with all her might to control herself. Breaking the kiss, she jumped off him to the ground and wiped her mouth with her palm. She took his hand and dragged him towards the embankment. 

Catherine constantly talked like crazy, actively gesticulating and telling Buggy that she loved him very much. Buggy looked at her, constantly smiling, still not understanding why she was with him.

Catherine once again understood that fate had once given her the biggest gift in her life. Buggy was secretly glad that she was braver than him one day, and stayed with him. 

Catherine knew that she loved him more than life itself. Buggy knew he loved her more than life. 

Catherine knew that for his sake, she would kill anyone. Buggy knew that although he was a coward, but he would kill anyone for her sake.

Catherine knew that she will always be by his side. Buggy will always be grateful for this.

Catherine knew that he loved her, although these words were not always easy for him. But she didn’t know that Buggy kept a piece of the diamond for himself. And only he knew for what purpose.

[tonydaddingham]

I’m so torn on whether I want there to be an angsty desperate mid-season kiss before the resolution just to make us scream or drag the tension out til right after the resolution when everything is Finally Settled For Good and rain is falling and Aziraphale can make his apology/confession and it’s slow and tender and deep

(either way, if the Penultimate Kiss isn’t a 360-degree revolving shot I don’t want it, v much convinced that was what Neil wanted to do for the Final Fifteen before he changed his mind)

i genuinely daydream about this (and s3 in general) an ungodly amount (do i just need to pull on my big girl pants and dive into the foray of writing fic??? probably) and try to juggle what would make sense for the narrative and the characters, and make it less about what i want to see from s3 personally ep1 sex scene cold open + '7 days earlier titlecard'

babes i know this is not at all what you asked for (tldr at the bottom) but bugger it im gonna write out where im currently at with the whole 'i would give all my worldly goods for s3 to go something like this'

(and if i ever write fic consider this basically the framework) (and therefore is half serious half bants) (and if nothing else helps keep meta/speculation straight in my head - imagining it all in context):

ep1 cold opens with another BTB flashback but set after the s2 one (aziraphale and crowley arguing about the brewing rebellion for example, aziraphale tries to warn him again etc, no wing lift), and then hard cut to modern day aziraphale, stood in the exact same position but alone, in his new regalia blah blah blah, roll opening theme

so ep1 is likely gonna be a fair bit of exposition of the second coming, right? maybe there's a timeskip? either way we get glimpses into their existences in the After. im undecided whether crowley would remain in london, or specifically the bookshop? (i think he would, because there's opportunity for a mirror of the 'he saved my books' moment - ie. not let muriel sell a single one - which im sure you can imagine could be Delicious later on), but in any case i think crowley - given that he's keeping tabs on tadfield etc in s2 - would start noticing that maybe the world isn't quite right, Loads of people have started going missing (also dropped as clues in s2), natural disasters etc. Hmm This Is Strange

meanwhile, we get a bit of insight into aziraphale's daily headache in heaven, until they finally get the fax from 'god' about the plane carrying the big JC (and, look, Whoever it is that gets off the plane, whatever theory you subscribe to, let's say hypothetically it's absolutely not jezzy c and aziraphale knows it... warlock? idk). aziraphale realises it's all gone A Bit Wrong, ah shit gonna need to talk to crowley.... rolls credits

(plus im sure there will be new characters plus possible reintroductions of previous ones etc etc that will need screentime)

so they don't interact at all until ep2, not until maybe like 10 mins in - muriel calls mr crowley, he gets to the bookshop and walks in

aziraphale waiting in there, casual as you like with a dainty cupperty (wrong, he's shitting himself), and there's the awkward moment of 'oh when we were last here alone you snogged the living daylights out of me', but they're very much Not Talking (About It)

aziraphale explains what's going on, it's all going wrong, They Can't Find Josh, crowley probably gets a bit shitty with a bit of 'i told you so', aziraphale gets pissed off too because 'he's kinda got a point', but regardless please help

i think crowley would initially refuse - why would he want to be involved at all??? in ending humanity once and for all??? - and would probably leave after a bit of a wessex-flashback-callback of 'we're not having this conversation'/'fine'/'fine!'

idk maybe aziraphale would go back to heaven and start to reeeeeally panic, because the guy they've got in heaven is definitely Not The Messiah, and aziraphale needs to find Him before shit really hitteth the fan, but he needs someone on earth to help him (sigh better go back and ask crowley again)

crowley meanwhile takes this information and possibly works out that actually lol turns out the second coming came a bit early, and yeah probably do need to find him before the world starts going completely to shit - aziraphale comes back and crowley agrees this time (✨a new Arrangement✨) (OH 'THE ARRANGEMENT' WOULD BE SUCH A GOOD EP TITLE)

but it's like. The Arrangement if it was truly all Just Business - they're Not Friends etc

maybe crowley going back to hell in reconnaissance mode would feature here? deploys the beloved tactical turtleneck again? ends up claiming the grand duke position or something? or has been grand duke all along? idk

now i would LOVE another long cold open of flashbacks, but idk if that's gonna happen, probably not. but possibly ep3 is them strategising, sharing intel, Still Not Talking, trying to put the pieces together (i still convinced that warlock/greasy johnson are gonna fit in here somewhere so like. return to tadfield? ripe opportunity to bring back The Them, Anathema/Newt etc)

REVERSE WALL SLAM and maybe a little bit of a spat where some of the anger from the final fifteen is let loose or something - but nothing resolved

probably some more shenanigans of shit going down in heaven, with Cheesus running rampant - angels starting to wonder wtf is going on (and god still has her out of office email on)

maybe the end of ep3 is that they work out what's happening - who JC is, where he is, why the second coming has already started, idk but like major plot pieces start slotting together

so ep4 is where it starts getting hazy but like. i feel that this is gonna be roundabout the time where aziraphale and crowley are in the bookshop researching like mad, trying to piece stuff together, come up with Plans, and maybe crowley goes looking in aziraphale's desk, and unearths the Photo - CUE 1941 FINAL FLASHBACK

and then we return maybe to present day? and this is where they finally get out all the shit that has been building up over the centuries, and culminated in the final fifteen - all the times they've upset the other, lied to the other, etc

tender bit towards the end of this - i need a "my dear" or even BETTER a "darling" thrown in here somewhere

however. i don't think there will be a kiss. a lot of shouting, crying, and maybe yeah stuff coming to some kind of tentative resolution/understanding, but not a kiss. idk i just don't think they'd be ready for it - they might come close to it, like i suspect happened in 41, but they both just honestly say they're not ready but that they meant what they said and that their One Day is coming, they're not done, they're not over 🥹🥹

nownownow hmmmm - end of ep4? angels/demons both come for them; shit's going on in the background, they've twigged this time they're Up To Something, and this time the bookshop isn't protected as it should be - get their arses hauled up to heaven. and major thing? metatron/crowley showdown - not a physical one but a...... 'oh didn't he tell you, aziraphale?'

EP5 LONG ASS COLD OPEN OF THE WAR AND THE FALL

book of life explanation in here somewhere idk

and then yeah maybe a bit of a pinnacle moment for aziraphale of choosing crowley after whatever is revealed from the fall? because he's keeping his promise dammit and he's choosing their side, always their side

firefight out of heaven (if aziraphale falls in the process im gonna throw hands but also. mmmm whump material) and maybe then the 360 kiss? bc you're so right and i totally agree - im glad they didn't do it for s2, but i do think it was initially intended and I Need It

someone gets injured probably but they all flee down to the bookshop and start preparing for whatever is about to come - heaven and hell vs. them/humanity etc. plus the dream sequence of the bookshop will never leave my mind Ever

idk if they'd stay there tho, maybe get back out to tadfield. further heart to heart probably after the whole fall, all cards on the table, 'is there still an us'/'of course there is you old silly' thing

and whilst i don't think ep6 will be like a huge battle, seems a bit ooc, Shit Goes Down, largely gets resolved in the first half just like s1. vavoom (not that kinda vavoom) (maybe) sorted

second coming gets sorted. idk how. but it does

id love for there to actually be some kind of interaction with god? in a way? even if she just stays silent, and they basically just come to their own conclusions about What The Point Is, and she just. smiles like the mona lisa

then the rest of ep6 is just. pure south downs

kiss

OOOOH a kiss outside the front door of their new yellow cottage (i live and die by the yellow cottage aesthetic) (because it's ✨pretty✨) AND IT'S RAINING BUT IT'S OKAY BECAUSE THERE'S A CUTE LITTLE GABLE PORCH OVER THEIR FRONT DOOR now there's a Vavoom

and another

oh go on then have another. and a cuddle. artful shot of them waking up of a sunny peaceful morning in bed together snuggling (ft. tasteful duvet/blanket draping? yes pls)

end of s3 has them slow dancing in the lounge/kitchen (in the GARDEN???) to The Song and the nightingale flies away from the windowsill outside (you can pry this visual away from my cold dead hands)

RIGHT so this is complete overkill @silcosmoke and for that you have my most profuse apologies bestie but. tldr yes a passionate snog in the midst of Tension and Drama, and then just lots of lovely little nice ones ☺️💕

[iceeericeee]

⛓️ ℭ𝔥𝔞𝔦𝔫 𝔐𝔞𝔦𝔩 ⛓️

I bring motivation! Post the working titles of 10 WIPs (optional) and write three new sentences for each

10???? Out of all the many I already have? Only 10?? /lh

Aight let’s do this

1. Escape (the Pina Colada Oneshot) [Bistro Huddy]

Whatever. Cheap communion wine she ‘borrowed’ from the local church wasn’t enough for tonight. Ray needed something strong yet still sweet, along with a physical and familiar presence. And she knew just the place.

2. Discovery [Ghosts CBS]

It didn’t take long before the others also noticed the cadaver. There was a collective mix of disgusted and distressed noises at the grisly sight. Jordan didn’t blame them, he himself couldn’t stand the sight of his own dead body.

3. A Pinch of Lassie [Psych]

“Jules, when am I not being suspicious? Genuine question.” And with that, he pulled the last blind down. After double checking the door was indeed locked, he turned back to the head of the conference table.

4. Third Cousins [Ghosts CBS x Psych]

Off in the left corner was a lone singular tab meant for the Woodstone BnB, practically buried under the dozens of other tabs opened. Each tab led to a different news article, all of them front pagers with a picture of the same guy in various poses. The dates on them varied, from as far back as 2006 and as recent as 2014.

5. Tomie x Psych

“Say, Woody…”

“Yeah Shawn?” The coroner continued digging through the abdomen, clearly having some trouble finding the scalpel he’d dropped.

“I’m uh, pretty sure she didn’t have that hand when we found her on the beach…”

6. Would You Still Love Me If We Were Seahorses? [Psych]

Juliet couldn’t help the grin. God, she forgot just how much Shawn’s goofball side could be endearing. He was especially so in moments like this.

7. Shawn’s Island [Psych]

“Dammit,” he grumbled. From here he could see that Shawn was very obviously not wearing a vest like him. So that meant… ugh, he had to save the idiot from drowning. Great.

8. The Giant Pom-Poms In the Sky [Psych]

The two quietly watched the fireworks going off in the distance. It was beautiful, really. The many colors sparkling against the pitch black backdrop of the sky, shimmering as they faded and allowed more to come after.

9. You Need To Leave. Now. [Psych]

There were a couple more cages like the ones downstairs, and scratch marks near the tall window across the room. But added to the chaos were bodies. Squirrels, rats, birds, and human bodies, all mutilated practically beyond recognition.

10. She’s His Best Man [Psych]

Juliet tugged a bit at the hem of her suit. It was just slightly uncomfortable, which was understandable considering the adjustments had been made last-minute to fit her frame. But it was at least keeping her warm. She couldn’t imagine how cold she would’ve been if she’d stuck with her original outfit.

[oddcryptidwrites]

OC vs Cockroach

@the-down-upside-finch tagged me in this and I'm gonna tag @anyablackwood @thetruearchmagos @indecentpause @druidx and whoever else wants to play (no pressure)

Rules: Rate your OCs on how well they’d fare against a cockroach

(For this one, we're gonna get a main character from each of my WIPS >:) because i love y'all and you deserve it)

Piers: 8/10 They'll jump and maybe screech from being startled, especially if it's close by, but they can squash it and clean it up after a bit

Brigid: 0/10 They do not do bugs. Like, at all. Melody will have to come evict it from their dorm room. Alternatively, they'll panic and try to set it on fire and likely scorch a couple other things in the process.

Izumi: 2/10 oh god the way they move Izumi will scream and will make Lapis or Andy come kill it. If she's left to her own devices, there's a 50/50 chance she'll either smash it with her shoe or just cry until it goes away. She's forgetful enough though that she will forget it existed though after a few hours...

Garlan: 10/10 This woman will pick that bug up barehanded and toss it out the window. Her office is covered in papers and stray offerings so roaches (or equivalent in her world) are pretty common

Bithos: 9/10 Smash that fucker, no hesitation, but he might get a little grossed out trying to clean it up.

Cassander: 2/10 No thank you. He will actively call Felix, who is on a mission, to come get it. If it disappears, he will burn the entire house down rather than it come back. (He's not scared of them, but he finds them weird and unnerving).

Alyx: 5/10 Might have a hard time finding the roach (blind) and will absolutely panic if he loses it. If she does find it, she can kill it and toss it without a problem.

Jesse: -10/10 Screaming crying, Lucio has to come get it before he has a mental breakdown (again)

Carter: 10/10 Easy peasy, will pick the bug up and gently place it outside, much to the horror of his husband who is terrified of roaches

Hank: 7/10 Despite being a farming man, he does NOT like how they move. He can get it killed (eventually) but it might take him a minute or to to get the guts to kill it.

LeBlanc: -1000000/10 He opened a package of wafers once and there was one inside the box that fell on him and the poor man has never been the same. He will scream like a little girl and someone else (Micah) will have to come kill it. If it somehow goes missing, he will never step foot in that room again unless it is killed.

Alba Grey: 5/10 Depends. If she's trying to impress Mavi and/or Tabs, she can do it easy peasy, but if she's alone? She might have a slight crying session and have to summon all of her courage to smack it with her shoe. (Don't let the badass exterior fool you)

Karson: ???/10 Isn't bothered by bugs in his space. The only reason he'll even deal with it is if August sees it and gets scared.

Cal: 0/10 NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE this boy does not do bugs (although there is a chance he'll think it's a hallucination instead and just ignore it in hopes it'll go away....)

Eddie: 10/10 This man can deal with bugs so easily. Smashed and cleaned up before anyone (his daughter) notices

[valos-venus-doom]

Drawn & Quartered [Chapter 7]

February 15th 2011

Caitlyn was in bed talking to her friend Nina on the phone, laptop in front of her. Nina had just gotten engaged to her boyfriend Mikel the day prior and they girls were excitedly talking.

"I just emailed you a link to bridesmaids dresses, what color do you think?" Nina asked.

"These are all kinda dark for a summer wedding though. Are you sure you don't want to with something brighter?" Caitlyn replied.

The girls continued their chit chat not knowing Ville had just arrived home. He heard Cait talking but wasn't sure to whom or what about. He walked through the bedroom and smiled at Cait, not wanting to interrupt her conversation. He made his way into the closet to start changing out of his snow-dampened clothes.

"Did you find the ring he got you? Let me see. Oh my God it's gorgeous Nina!" Ville listened to the one-sided conversation. "He really chose a gorgeous ring. ...Oh my god look at this one though. Yeah, I just sent it to you. You go it? Isn't it so pretty?! I love it."

Ville tried not to eavesdrop as he passed through the bedroom again to go into the bathroom to bathe. He was able to deduce that Caitlyn and one of her friends had been talking about engagement rings. The fact that he heard Cait talking about rings and was kind of looking for herself got Ville oddly excited. He never really cared too much about marriage, and he and Cait had decided in the past it wasn't a necessity, but they also never said 'never' either.

Ville got out of the bath and he realized he didn't hear Cait talking any longer. Poking his head out of the bathroom door he saw she was no longer sitting on the bed, but her laptop was.

Ville quickly pulled his boxers on and took a look at her laptop. There were several tabs open, and he found the one Caitlyn had sent over to Nina, the ring that she had said she really liked.

"Say no more, my love." he mumbled as he sent himself the link to the ring via email. He was convinced he was going to shock the pants off of her and he couldn't wait.

January 10th 2012, 1pm

Ville hadn't been out of bed in days. The room was littered with water bottles and beer cans, cigarette ashes scattered across the floor, he'd given up on ashtrays almost entirely. The TV in the room played some random infomercial he'd heard almost 30 times before. He nearly had it memorized.

[ *BANG BANG BANG* ]

Ville could hear someone at the door, but he couldn't care less.

[ *BANG BANG BANG* ]

"Oh fuck off..." he grumbled grumpily before rolling over and slamming the pillow over his head.

To his delight, the banging ceased and he began to fall back to sleep. Only to be interrupted what felt like miliseconds later to a booming voice.

"Ville!" It was Mige.

"Fucking hell! When did you get here?" Ville asked sitting upright, heart racing in his chest.

"You didn't hear me banging?" Mige asked, clearly annoyed.

"I did. I was hoping whoever it was would fuck off." Ville replied with an eyeroll as he reached for his cigarettes and lighter. "What brings you here?" Ville asked nonchalantly as he lit the cigarette hanging from his lips.

"You haven't picked up the phone, for anyone, in days." Mige stared him down.

"Seppo bought me a new phone. It's somewhere. I think it's dead." Ville motioned dismissively with his hand. "How'd you get in anyway?"

"I got a key from Seppo." Mige answered impatiently. "I had to come over because no one has heard from you all week and when your mother texted me I got worried. I came over because I wasn't going to let your parents be the ones to find you had offed yourself."

Ville shook his head "I'm still here."

"You need to cut the shit." Mige shook his head in frustration, "This has gone on long enough. You're spent enough time feeling sorry for yourself and you've been making life hell for everyone around you. It's not okay and you need to pull yourself together."

Ville stared at Mige indignantly. He didn't have a real response.

"Don't fucking look at me like that." Mige admonished. "You know I'm right."

Ville dropped his head to his hands, keeping his lit cigarette in mind so he didn't burn his hair, "I know." He grumbled. "It just hurts so much." His voice cracked but he forbade himself from crying.

"Yeah, I know. But we have work to do and you need to stop terrorizing everyone. Clean yourself up, charge your phone, call your mother, get out of the house. Get some fresh air and stop moping."

Ville nodded.

"I'll see you Monday?" Mige asked.

Ville nodded again.

"Good." Mige patted Ville roughly on the shoulder, trying to be obnoxious to make Ville smile. And it worked, he got half a smile at least.

Ville knew Mige was right, he also knew he needed more cigarettes so he followed his friend's advice to the letter.

After a quick shower he threw on his shoes and a warm hoodie and headed out the door, leaving a message on his mom's phone that he was alive and well and not to worry.

January 11th 2012, 2am

Ville lit a cigarette as he sat at the end of his bed shirtless, watching the dark haired woman in front of him undress. He'd gone out for cigarettes initially, but got a call from a friend who wanted to meet up. This friend also happened to have more coke for Ville so he decided to go out and have some fun. There he met Sasha. She was his type. Tall, slender, dark hair. She wore bright red lipstick Ville didn't care for, but she gave him attention and it wasn't bad to feel desired again. Even if Sasha *was* giving him groupie vibes.

Sasha, now in nothing but a bra knelt down in front of Ville and he buckled his pants. Feeling her warm mouth on him, he inhaled sharply. "If Cait can move on, so can I." He thought to himself, eyes closed.

When he reopened them, he saw the pigsty that became his bedroom. He'd normally be embarrassed having a stranger witness the fallout of his life like this, but he didn't particularly care.

He shook his head and tried to focus on the woman between his knees, but it was difficult. Every time he shut his eyes he thought about Caitlyn. Frustrated, he pulled Sasha onto the bed and quickly penetrated her. No softness, no warm up, at this point. Ville just wanted to get to the finish line.

Sasha gasped and moaned as Ville fucked her, his eyes shut tight, trying to pretend he was anywhere but there. When was the last time he even touched Caitlyn? He kept trying to remember the last time they had sex together. Why did it feel like an entire lifetime ago?

Ville lost his pacing, he could feel his erection slipping away. Frustrated he tried going harder, but it was no use.

Just as quickly as he pushed Sasha down, he got off of her and sat on the edge of the bed, exasperated.

"Hey... you okay?" She asked timidly.

"I'm fine." Ville answered, cringing at how awkard this entire thing was. Now he remembered why he never did one night stands. "You can go." Ville coldly dismissed her as he stood up, "Lock up before you leave, if you could." He didn't look at her before disappearing into the bathroom. He didn't need to pee, he just needed to be anywhere but in that room on the bed with a stranger.

Ville stood awkwardly in his own bathroom, waiting until he heard Sasha leave. It felt like eons before he heard the front door open and shut. Once he was positive she was gone he walked back into his bedroom and looked around at the wreckage.

He needed to clean up. For a split second he thought about Cait and how upset she would be at the state of things. At the state of him. But the thought quickly faded and he heard Mige's voice in his head: "Cut the shit. You've spent enough time feeling sorry for yourself." It took Ville an extremely awkward one night stand for him to really see the forest from the trees.

Caitlyn was gone. She was clearly moved on and he needed to also.

Ville pulled out his phone to call her, wanting to just have one last conversation for closure but he decided against it. What good would that do? He thought to himself. Instead, he texted Sasha.

"Hi, sorry about that. I started not feeling well. I'll call you tomorrow."

He sat back on his bed and threw his phone into his bed into the tangle of blankets. Reaching for the remote, he flipped through channels until he found some documentary about medieval torture. Ville figured maybe hearing about the immense suffering of others would make him somehow feel better. Who really had it worse? Him or the poor blokes who were slowly lowered into a vat of molten iron?

Eventually, they documentary got to a portion covering the fate of a legendary Scotsman and traitor of the Crown, William Wallace. The fate? Drawn & quartering.

The victim was drawn (dragged by a horse to the place of execution), hanged (not to the death), disemboweled, beheaded, and then quartered, sometimes by tying each of the four limbs to a different horse and spurring them in different directions.

"If I'm drawn and quarterered it's only for you..."

The moment the line popped into his mind and Ville sat straight up. Reaching for a notebook on the floor he scribbled it down, the melody slowly coming to him as he hummed.

"Guitar." He grumbled. "Need guitar." he scrambled out of bed and continued humming the melody. "If I'm drawn and quartered it's only for you..."

It was nearing 3:30 in the morning, but he didn't care. He felt the music swelling inside of him, needing to be bled out.

"Let's hold these heart's for one another

It's worth all wounds, it must be..." he muttered madly as he scribbled.

'Finally,' he thought to himself, as relief washed over him 'Release.' Ville could have cried, he suddenly felt soothed. He felt like he could take the first full breath for the first time in weeks. Once again, music coming to save the day.

[unrelaxing]

media list (26.02.2024 - 26.03.3024)

👂 Listened:

Albums:

Speak Now (Taylor's Version) by Taylor Swift (2023) [8/10, probably my favourite of her re-releases, Timeless and Electric Touch are amazing vault songs.]

Red (Taylor's Version) by Taylor Swift (2021) [7/10, I don't really love any of the vault songs in this except for the 10 minute version of All Too Well, and while I like the tune and vibe of I Bet You Think About Me, I find it lyrically awkward.]

D-Day by Agust D (2023) [5/10, musically I just don't vibe with Yoongi's solo stuff a lot of the time, so it always ends up being a very distant appreciation, and I'll be honest and say I probably wouldn't listen if I wasn't already a fan.]

Indigo by RM (2022) [8.5/10, really really solid album, though it couldn't quite overtake mono. for me in terms of how much I loved it - considering if I were to rate mono. it would absolutely be a 10/10.]

Podcasts:

Morbid Episodes: ⤷ EP 502: The Highgate Vampire ⤷ EP 503: The Torsaker Witch Trials ⤷ EP 541: The Unsolved Murder of Georgette Bauerdorf

📖 Read:

Articles:

The ATO is reviving old tax debts totalling billions, threatening some taxpayers with bankruptcy by Nassim Khadem from abc.net.au

Dissecting the Diabolical Documentary 'Mister Organ' with Filmmaker David Farrier by Lulu Dropo from The Advocate

How Michael Organ Weaponised the Family Court... and Sean Plunket by David Farrier from Webworm

Mystery in Japan as dangerous streptococcal infections soar to record levels by Justin McCurry from Guardian

China visit sees $105 billion iron ore exports on the brink by Jamie Seidel from news.com.au [I don't often remember to actually put any political articles on this list, but this remained open on my tabs for a while so it makes it.]

Too close for comfort: Aussie filmmaker’s accidental portrait of a psychopath by Karl Quinn from Sydney Morning Herald [As made obvious by this list, I do tend to watch something then immediately seek out more information - a lot of the time it just leads me to reddit threads, but other times I do find articles and read those.]

The Bible Says Jesus Was Real. What Other Proof Exists? by Christopher Klein from history.com

What is the historical evidence that Jesus Christ lived and died? by Dr. Simon Gathercole from Guardian [I was dragged to church by my other and it hit me that I'd never even tried to find proof on whether or not Jesus wasn't fiction, so I started reading what people had to say. tldr; no archeological proof, though people of Jesus' class at the time didn't tend to leave archeological proof of their existence, and it seems there are accounts of Jesus starting 30 years after his death from non-Christians, so. Probably a real guy. Whether or not he's actually the son of God is, of course, unable to be proven.]

Books:

Stalking Darkness by Lynn Flewelling [finished! Another 10/10.]

Pine by Francine Toon [dropped - couldn't continue this one anymore, it's slow and filled with details that had nothing to do with the actual mystery or the characters themselves - I think other people might have appreciated it for the way it allowed you to visualise the setting so vividly, but to me it was just incredibly boring.]

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen [in progress, told myself I'd read more classics and thought I'd start with one I was supposed to read in high school.]

Spy x Family vol. 1 [finished! 10/10. Immediately bought the 10 volumes out on Amazon after reading this because I enjoyed it so much. Loid Forger is a goldmine of a male character, the kind that's easy to fall for and to root for. Anya is sweet and funny and interesting, and Yor is just the icing on the cake of their dynamic.]

Spy x Family vol. 2 [finished! 10/10 - my goodreads rating system is going to be SKEWED after reading this manga.]

Spy x Family vol. 3 [finished! 8/10 mostly because I didn't love Yor's brother at all.]

📺 Watched:

Movies:

Dune: Part Two [8/10 - this really revitalised my love of going to the cinema! I've watched it twice, and I've made plans to see some other movies in theatre and it's really all because this was such an experience to see on the big screen. Highly recommend.]

YouTube:

The Deranged Arsonist Who Filmed Their Own Crime • Mystery Files from Watcher

The Perplexing Legend of Vermont's Sea Monster • Mystery Files from Watcher

True Crime Cases with Disturbing CCTV Evidence from Lazy Masquerade

Documentaries:

Our Planet II [This was gorgeous and informative and also eye-opening in how it shows you the direct impact of human carelessness on so many creatures, to the albatrosses choking on plastic and the walruses unable to find ice to leave its baby. At the same time, there's hope! There's humans helping crabs cross roads, and bridges being built for animals who've used the same paths for hundreds and possibly thousands of years.]

Life In Colour with David Attenborough

Worst Roommate Ever EP 1-2: [the first episode one was WILD, especially because I had no idea this was a true crime when I clicked on it, and so did not expect it was going to involve several dead bodies buried in a little old lady's backyard. I do feel like this was such an intriguing case that I had a hard time finishing the second episode, since it feels so much more ... dull in comparison, as terrible as that is to say about murders.]

David Farrier's Mister Organ [I'm a long-time fan of David Farrier, but didn't get a chance to watch this for a while. This one is a dark, dark tale that has nothing to do with murders. It's all psychological. I'm always amazed with how well Farrier can explore the darkness of humans without turning to the usual things we think of when we think of 'bad' people. I'd also recommend reading this article - which I'll also read on my read articles list - after watching this documentary, just so you know how insidious Michael Organ truly is.]

Into The Deep: The Submarine Murder Case [I don't give the things I watch ratings, but if I did, this would be a 10/10 - it's a unique experience to be able to see footage of how the people close to a murderer react as they realise the kind of person their friend is.]

[saintavangeline]

REPLY: Since Adeline they seem to have slept around with their friends so that's an easy 2 or 3 right there, they seem to really chase after Asian girls or ppl who Asian-fish, or just goth girls I'm pretty confident they may be a chaser, not a surprise since they seem fixated on anime and their brain has probably rotted from all the questionable things they probably open in a private tab.

I started keeping track around the time they posted the chasing Lana Del Ray fems Tik_tok video, then promptly nuked their entire account, ID be embarrassed to publicly fetishsize the suffering of women too dawg. There's about 6-7I can even remotely suspect or confirm, based on the time span of their flings. Before then I watched the girls come and go so often, I thought they were bot follows lol. Sad to come clean to it but a few of the girls I can't find again, I'm sure they were threatened, every last one of them. Reflecting on it, I think they are incapable of loving anyone in a healthy way, I try not to stay awake lately thinking about the girls that slipped by me unnoticed. Usually dark haired girls with mental illnesses who have some dirt he can use Id bet on it, some of the girls went quicker than others, so my stats are shakey and can be given or taken from .

Victims 1-3 seem to be mutuals of varying intimacy (Supposed close friends, posted in proximity to a pub tumblr post alluding to being "Open with friends" God help us if they think they can handle open relationships.)

Victims 4-5 Goth girls, unclear if the pinup gif set, poems, fanfictions and "rolled up my sleeve for a hot dyke at work" posts were for the Asian girl they are moots with or any of the other miscellaneous private accounts that orbited them.

6 was a girl they posted a photo of themself holding up in their arms, then deleted from tumblr and instagram for unclear reasons, they commented on their posts before, things that seemed jarringly toxic even in jest. "Message me or I'll KMS".

7 Group listing here, they use to their advantage their notoriety and I have witnessed them interact with the young people who pine over them on their blog, they interact from a side account using their photo on the blogs of some frequently interacting followers, guess they get off to their ego being stroked.

This genuinely made me fucking sick to read.

I don’t even know where to begin with my thoughts on this..

I am very out of the loop because I have them blocked on everything for my mental health, so hearing all of these updates are genuinely insane.

I hope they see this and get chills knowing that people are paying attention and know what they truly are.

[stackthedeck]

I posted 11,881 times in 2022

381 posts created (3%)

11,500 posts reblogged (97%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@evilwickedme

@bi-dubmass11

@king-b0mbastic

@elytrians

@dingdongyouarewrong

I tagged 1,995 of my posts in 2022

#asks - 268 posts

#marvel - 71 posts

#matt murdock - 41 posts

#daredevil - 40 posts

#peter parker - 36 posts

#my fanfic - 32 posts

#spiderman - 31 posts

#fanfic - 30 posts

#marveledit - 21 posts

#not to be a lesbian but oh my god - 17 posts

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

I made a survey about fanfiction bookmarking habits with the goal of finding out how people save and share fanfiction. I had 107 responses and 9 questions, two of which were completely qualitative, but 7 were quantitative with an option for qualitative responses. This was a rough initial survey and they're biased towards tumblr and tiktok users because those are the platforms I put them out on. This data should not be applied to the whole fan community, but they're interesting nonetheless

I promised y'all graphs so I'm going to throw them under the read more because oh boy

Analysis of the data but I encourage you to look at the results and draw your own conclusions: Fans tend to have some method of saving fanfics that they really enjoy. The bookmark feature on ao3 is the most used but it tends to be a passive action similar to pushing kudos rather than commenting or is used only for fics that are really special. If ao3 bookmarks aren't the primary means of saving a fic, downloading or bookmarking the tab tends to be the most common. Fans seem to be more open to talking about reading fanfic both online and with irl friends although this is still some level of secrecy around it. It seems social media has an impact on what fics get read

See the full post

151 notes - Posted November 15, 2022

#4

My reads on the superbats dynamics

Superman/Batman: coworkers at best, each other’s nightmare scenario at worst

Superman/Bruce Wayne: is the most powerful man on earth…the trophy husband of some weird goth billionaire??

Clark Kent/Batman: Clark “Pulitzer prize winning investigative journalist” Kent and Bat “world’s greatest detective” man are the absolute dream team these two kick ass

Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne: country boy/goth you know what I’m talking about

160 notes - Posted July 30, 2022

#3

Hello! I have come asking if you can do a fic rec for superbat pls? Idk I you do this on tumblr or only on tiktak but either way love your content wishing you a good day! 💖

I AM SO SORRY this has been sitting in my askbox for ages anon I hope you see this!! Like I adore superbat but I was really into them during my phase of not bookmarking anything so I had to dig through my history lmao

Exclusive by rotasha- one of my favorite superbats fics, the slowburn, the mystery around the identity, the angst about keeping secrets, Bruce struggling with being a parent for the first time, Clark bounding with Dick, UGH I LOVE IT

Interview with a Batman by Mithen- God I love Journalist Clark Kent and Batman being soft bro they make out in the batmobile it's so good!!

A Sense of Identity by DaaroMoltor- they start dating before either of them reveals their identity god the angst is off the charts!! And oh my gosh they're both written so well with all their different facets of identity

That Which We Call a Rose by arysteia- I love the way it jumps through time and explores the dynamics of a love square with two people and all the ways their lives intersect

Man of Steel, Man of Heart by capsicleonyourleft- there's so much to love in this fic but I want to give a shout-out to the fight scenes because yes that is exactly how batman is supposed to fight and I want to drill it into the heads of anyone that makes a batman movie and BRUCE HAS A COMPETENCY KINK

Stuck in the Middle (With You) by TheResurrectionist- batfam shenanigans and Clark is there to witness his stepkids (anything with the tag Tim v Damian: Dawn of beating the shit out of each other is excellent lmao)

275 notes - Posted August 22, 2022

#2

Marvel made Matt Murdock a whore because any person in the 80s/90s would see a guy dressed in a bright red bodysuit specifically made to look like the devil because said guy has a complicated relationship with religion and by his nature he feels that he’s already damned and the guy has an absent mother, a dead dad, and was mentored by an emotionally unavailable older man and be like yeah that’s a homosexual

395 notes - Posted April 18, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Goncharov posting brings a completely different new interesting angle to your what is fanfiction question. If we agree that fanfic has to be based or inspired by a different media, then what is goncharov fanfiction? Does the media have to exist for it to have a transformative Fandom?

aaaah anon I love you so much thank you so much for bringing this to me!! Okay, so my definition of fanfiction is fiction written by self-professed fans in a fandom specific context. So I'm a fan of Spider-Man, I write fiction about Spider-Man to post on ao3 for other fans to read. If marvel hired me to write a Spider-Man comic, I'm still a fan who is writing fiction, but I'm no longer doing it in the context of fandom.

So with that definition in mind, we need to categorize what the fuck Goncharov is. So in my mind, Goncharov is a meme, but it is also the practice of collective storytelling, really no different functionally than Arthurian folklore or any mythology that's been taken out of its original context. We all looked at a pair of boots and said let's write a story together, that's not that different than looking at a mountain and connecting it to the legitimacy of English kings. Goncharov is myth/folklore just very recent and on the internet.

So there is fanfic of Goncharov on ao3. If someone calls their own work fanfic, then it is fanfic. People are not writing these fanfics to add to the folklore, they're not claiming that what they're writing down is canon, rather they're claiming to be building off the canon (that doesn't exist in the sense of the movie, but does exist in the sense that we've all agreed on some sense of truth to it). But because the transformation of the fiction is happening at the same time as the fiction is being defined, the transformation is influencing the collective telling. What is the truth of this story we've all agreed on and what is the fan interpretation in the form of fiction?

In the sense that fandom culture is baked into the creation of this collective myth, all of Goncharov is fanfiction. But because we all have equal creative power over the truth of the fiction, none of Goncharov is fanfiction. Both things are true at the same time. Schrodinger's fanfic if you will.

404 notes - Posted November 21, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[taviokapudding]

I have another Genshin theory/thought but it’s controversial

Hear me out

Xiao could be Khaenri’ahn / Sal Vindagnyr descendant

1. The karma will eventually make him turn into a monster, similar to the curse of the Khaenri’ahns

2. The demons he fights tend to usually be corrupted hilichurls or monsters trained by the abyss

3. It’s implied the karma got worse after the Calamity & the celestial nail in the mines is identical to the one on dragonspine. Maybe Celestia uses a similar curse every time they drop a nail & that’s why Xiao has his karma that’s similar but not exactly the same to the hilichurl - whether it’s genetic or from being close enough to ground zero by the mines is unknown

4. he has Diamond shaped pupils that match Kaeya, Albedo, & Dainsleif more than Zhongli

5. all the Yaksha who wore diamonds in their designs turned into monsters that had to be put down- why were only they affected if they’re also adepti like Cloud Retainer?

6. we don’t actually know where he’s from nor if his master was a precursor to Durin but, since Xiao eats snow, we at least know he lived on Dragonspine before Morax freed him. Gold always returns to Dragonspine and may have tapped into a fallen god’s energy to create Durin - we don’t have all the information but just enough to open speculation since Khaenri’ahn ruins, irminsul ruins that match the material domains, and technology are littered all over Dragonspine

7. his karma acts up while he’s in the mines looking for answers- does his proximity to the celestial nail and remnants of Khaenri’ah hurt him and that’s why Zhongli kept him from searching for answers for so long?

8. during his burst, a female voice whispers to him- that might be the Goddess of Heavenly Principals

9. 2 of the remaining original 7 actively visit and treat his depression & karma - why do they continue to keep tabs on him & encourage him to remain alive in comparison to everyone else they know? Also why are they not affected by his corruption when by technicality they should be now that they lack gnosi

10. he’s about the same age if not 500 years older than Venti so there’s a very small chance he could’ve witnessed or had family who witnessed the end of Sal Vindagnyr

11. the fallen Knights of Khaenri’ah have similar black smoke to Xiao’s karma smoke

12. technically there’s never been confirmation that Khaenri’ahns were formerly humans and Gold is clearly using alchemy to prolong their age - adepti could be distant relatives or similar beings

13. all characters affected by a Khaenri’ah related curse/abyss corruption are able to find peace by being with the traveler in some form or fashion + respond to music positively

[brick-a-doodle-do]

It's been forever since I've been on tumblr so have an ask for the ask game thing, 1, 2, 3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 10, 121, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50

-Small brain anon

sb. you've struck again. just for you, since i haven't seen you in a while, i will answer all of them. except for the ones i have asked: 2, 3, 8, 12, 15, 18, 19, 22, 23, 27, 33, 39, 44, 45, and 50!

answers under cut,,,

1 : if you have a lighter, what color is it?

i have one, but i don't really use it. also i have no clue where it is. it's blue tho!

4 : how often are you on tumblr?

oh god. i have a horrible addiction to like constantly checking it, which i am not proud of and it's really annoying. but i'm not on tumblr for longer than 5-ish minutes before i decide to close the tab. but that cancels out when i open the tab again a few minutes later. trying to fix it. but i am pretty much always on tumblr and check it at the most every 5-6 hours :/

5 : are you only doing this because you're bored?

mmhh when i rbed it, yes, but now i want to do something with my fingers and this is a good fix :D

6 : what blogs do you mostly interact with?

depends on what "interact with" actually means but in terms of actually interacting with blogs that also interact with me, (moots, essentially), it's really only becky and squishy on a day-to-day basis. sometimes 3d and sloth pop up tho. i interact, (in terms of liking, rb-ing, etc.), with a whole bunch of ppl tho ,,,,

7 : can you swim?

yes!

9 : which do you prefer, cotton candy or funnel cake?

if i've had funnel cake, i don't remember it. so cotton candy. but honestly funnel cakes look way better ,,,

10 : have you ever used a fork as a bookmark?

no i have not! i'd easily consider it though ,,

11 : bass or drums?

god both are so awesome. but i'd say bass. BUT my exception for that is mark boardman that man makes their songs so fkn amazing have you HEARD the drums in golden hour or oyygc? LIKE MCXMCMXN his drums with wil's voice is just so lovely.

13 : can we be friends?

yes!

14 : do you admire the clouds and the color of the sky?

all the time. being in a car is so lovely because MMMM SKYYY !!!

16 : a netflix series that's your favorite?

the haunting of hill house/bly manor and midnight club are all beautiful shows and i fkn love them ,,, i also love orange is the new black even tho it isn't a netflix original ,,

17 : an earliest obsession you can remember?

g/t. it's a basic answer but looking back on my life, all the way from when 4-year-old me asked my dad what he would do if i shrunk, to writing a story about a giant when i was in 3rd grade to whatever the hell my fanfiction writing has turned into which started in 2018—it's a BIG part of me and has been for a while

20 : have you listened to the crane wives?

UGHMGDS,VXMCM qasdvkmdscMDFFSDVCX I LOVE THE CRANE WIVES. I AM CONSIDERING ASKING TO GO TO ONE OF THEIR SHOWS CAUSE IT'LL BE IN PHILLY !!!!! I LOVE THEM SMM

21 : your first celebrity crush?

aiden gallagher . don't ask. and it only worsened with tua. but i am out of that phase now ^_^

24 : what have you learned about yourself?

that i'm more like my mother than i ever thought i'd be eueue (in a /neutral way cause she's a great mom i just find myself doing the habits of hers that i never liked)

25 : can you tie a cherry stem with your tongue?

ah, no. i've tried once and gave up ,, i hope to eventually be able to do it tho !!

26 : do you believe in aliens?

in a way, yes, because there is a lot in the universe and i refuse to believe there isn't some type of life out there, but it's my same response with ghosts: i want to believe

28 : an unusual song that's your favorite?

LOTS. to narrow down on one, any of my favorite broadway songs. in any scenario i would never put it on a playlist but i fucking love broadway sm it itches something in my brain. probably something from heathers cause that's such a dark humor-ed thing,,,,

also a tv show called earth isn't my favorite but it's really sweet idek why i enjoy it sm <3

29 : the last thing you ate?

candy cigarettes !! the chalky ones

30 : do you have a favorite time to write?

mainly at night, from the hours of 12-1 when i really want to sleep but there's a scene in my head that won't leave >:)

31 : have you gotten bitten by a dog?

of course,, but nothing dangerous just when they accidentally bite while playing

32 : do you write better with a pen or pencil?

my handwriting is better with a pencil but it's easier to write with a pen imo

34 : when you hear "peace" what do you think of?

mmhghh satisfaction on everyone's person.

35 : a school subject you're good with?

honestly i'm pretty good at math. i'm not the best and it gets overwhelming but it always does ,,,,

36 : how many alarms do you have set?

one, (for 9:40 am), and i don't follow it. i mean not usually. i'll either wake up before it, sleep through it, or wake up to it and then fall back asleep eueu

37 : do you shop at thrift stores?

when my mom takes me to one, yeah !

38 : what's the meaning behind your url?

mm i have good stuff for this. my name is brick, of course, and then in the show derry girls one of the characters is constantly saying 'fuck-a-doodle-do' for a few episodes and then i decided to combine the two. it has NOTHING to do with cock-a-doodle-do, chickens do not deserve my respect.

40 : who's your favorite character to write?

i feel like tommy is my go-to, and yeah the narrator for him is fun asf but i like writing techno. he's fun. i like him a lot more than i did before which i'm really happy about because i found his character very intimidating to write :D

41 : you gotta have a favorite beatles song, what is it?

this may change, but it's twist and shout. it reminds me of my dad :D

42 : earphones or a speaker?

earphones for the quiet me-time, and speaker for the times when i'm feeling extroverted or when i'm in the car w my mom :)

43 : what do you remember from your childhood?

this is such a vague question. i uHNMM remember lots of stuff, but mostly my annual trips to disney world with my family !!

46 : a christmas song you secretly like?

there is no secret here, but i LOVE ¿dónde está santa clause? it's mildly racist but i love the ending sm 😭

47 : book stores or record stores?

book stores !

48 : how weird were these questions

i found them pretty neutral eueueu and fvcnhcjfdbbcx ahhhh finally i am at the end !!!!!

49 : what scents do you like?

gasoline and chemical-induced markers...i'm not ashamed to admit that. they're so bad for you but they SMELL SO GOOD why ??????? also i love pinapple scented stuff :D

50 : are there 20 new aus i have to catch up on?

ah, YES. yes there are. they should all be on my masterpost! but that's just the names of them, altho i'm sure if you searched on my page you could find them easily ,,,

,,, ah. well. i'd say thank you for the ask....but am i really thankful? /j of course i am. hope you are having a good day and are doing good ! <3<3

[olivieblake]

Hi Olivie! I am back with some praise for “The Lovers Grim”!!! I did read this in November but life went crazy (as it always does) so I am just now sending you my praise. (spoilers included). This is a bit long but most of its length just comes from me sending quotes I loved so hopefully if you just skim those it won’t be as long, I’m sorry :( 

I keep telling people that it was a lot sexier than the preceding books in the fairytale collections so that made it super fun overall!!!

Clara and the Devil: What a fun way to start! I love stories where the devil shows up and there’s temptation so I knew I was going to love this one, and I did! I love Clara, I find her super relatable to me. I keep notes in my notes app on my phone as I read your books and I just have written “this is just sexy and everyone is horny” so many times hahah (please take that as a compliment because it is). THE ENDING TOO LIKE 🥵  MY GOD I LOVED IT. Made me want to immediately go jump the WEBTOON, which I did and am obsessed with. The female version of the devil is 🥵 and I definitely have some theories on everything. I’m really liking the bargains with the universe part, I too make bargains with the universe in the hopes it will help me. I read the new update from yesterday too and ahhh so excited to see where everything goes. THE ART OF COURSE IS BEAUTIFUL SENDING MY PRAISE TO LITTLE CHMURA. 

I loved this line from the story “I’d asked him to meet me on the beach in the middle of the night, which were terms the devil readily agreed to. He was very agreeable that way, which I hated, but which I also understood. He was reliably available for my sins.”

Both the “Apple’s a bit much don’t you think” and Devil’s food cake made me laugh hahahaha. I also really liked the line “There is more to being good than simply abstaining from vice.”

Once it Happens: OLIVIE THIS STORY!!! It’s truly a story I always dreamed of wanting and just didn’t know existed so I’m super thankful you wrote it. I also did cry as well as feel a whole range of emotions (which as an emotionally repressed person is some of the highest praise I can give you). I’m a lover of the idea of being in someone’s orbit/fate drawing people together/invisible string/soulmates so this story was exactly what I needed. I consider this (and La Petite Mort obviously which I actually reread in December as a pick me up with the audiobook-also fantastic-and loved it even more the second time around.Thanks for that book❤️) my two matches made in heaven. This story actually explains why I ship certain ships, like nicolibby for example, just because I find this type of dynamic to be a super strong and important connection so it makes it hard to fathom them being with other people (for me specifically). Even the bit where “Once it happens, it can't unhappen. It can't be undone.” made me think of  “we met, so now we can’t detach” type thing. Most of my favorite ships have this type of dynamic so it made me love this story even more. This story is one I still think about 24/7 and it just made me think a lot/it said so much in so little and left such an impact on me. I think I tabbed every paragraph in this one like I loved it and could probably just sit here and write down every one and tell you all my thoughts etc but that would waste so much of your time so I shall refrain. Just know “I LOVE THIS STORY SO FUCKING MUCH” was written in my notes on this one about 100 times. Enjoy a few of my random rambles:

All the different times they could meet/that it happens and THE ICE CREAM SHOP BEING A COMMON THEME. 

“They are children together, opening gifts. They are teenagers, discovering life. They are adults, and sad ones, and when he tilts her chin up for a kiss she breathes something into his mouth he's certain is one word: Finally. He will marry her within a year.” THIS MADE ME CRY

“They live separately and their lives never cross. His children will have her smile and her sense of humor, and neither of them will ever know it.” THEY STILL HAVE THE THREADS OF EACH OTHER IN LIVES THEY DON’T KNOW EACH OTHER (this also made me cry)

The ice cream shop closing 😭😭😭 and then figuring out they grew up in the same town and they think about how they could have met a thousand different ways and didn’t, it’s funny how they came so close and she says she’s glad it finally 

THE ENDING PARAGRAPH I’M CRYING AGAIN

Literally thank you for this story and thank you for just writing all my favorite stories and books, much love❤️❤️❤️

Captain McIver’s Ship of Souls: This one was so funny and I loved seeing Arno just be confused about humans haha but I was so intrigued. My personal favorite thing was that the finfolk crave blood and the multiple blood sucking scenes, I don’t know what that says about me but hey it WORKS for me and made me just so very happy to see. THANK YOU QUEEN. The twist in this one was also super good, I didn’t see it coming. I have decided that Eilif from the TA6 universe is one of Arno’s cousins (it is canon in my heart and that is all that matters <3) Here’s some moments I absolutely loved. 

“Captain,” comes the voice of Eli's first mate. He's the one who was last to jump on Eli's orders, Arno notes, and dislikes him slightly, though without any particular reason.” We love when a love interest hates a person for just not respecting their love interest!!! ONE OF MY FAVS

To Make a Man: So interesting!!! I was trying to guess what type of creatures they both were the whole time and the stakes were super high so it was so hard to put down. Marcelo has some great lines like ugh THIS MAN he was down so bad. The angst in this is god tier. I just love that they each brought a little bit of peace to each other for a time, and in my head they can find their way back together in however many years.

“Lina, Lina, Lina. You are the softness of your skin, the sharpness of your mind. You are the knife-edge of your humor, which doesn't look like humor at first because, on you, joy looks like suspicion. You are the distance you so meticulously keep between us. You are the door, the latch, the key I understand now that I am an invasion; even with my best intentions, you can only trust me the way you'd trust a flood. There's no choosing which parts of me you accept or which parts of you I want. We seep in through each other's cracks, all or nothing” I LOVED THIS LIKE MY GOD I LOVED IT SO MUCH 

“He would have traded euphoria just to keep her, to make her the subject of his tedium. To live a colorless life in the shade of her bones, in the sound of her breath, knowing and eternally recounting the monotony of her details until he grinds himself down to nothing, never learning or experiencing another beautiful thing.” STOPPPP SO GOOD 

“Someday, she thought, she would remember this for all that it was, and for all that it wasn't. She would resurrect this very moment into countless perpetuity and embrace the searing pain of it; suffer the boundless joy. Because it had been real. Every moment of it. Every blessed thread.” PAIN 

Kill the Bachelor: Another dream I didn’t think to have but like two contestants on the Bachelor ditching him and falling in love??? Amazing. The TV script set up was so cool too it really made me feel like I was just watching episodes of the bachelor. All the satire in this was A+. This one also had me laughing a bunch. Anway, men suck and women are always better (but Josh’s crush on Lauren was cute too)

YAY woman in STEM!!!

“Do you ever feel like you're in this crowd of people and nobody really sees you? Like, you're there, but nobody gets you, you know what I mean?" Yes all the time 

KARA (sympathetically)

“A sad day for all Bachelor fans indeed, Craig."

CRAIG (nodding)

"Sure is, Kara! And now, Andrew with the weather."

That made me laugh out loud 

I’ll be sending my praise for YES super soon (hopefully soon at least lol I have condense my thoughts/praise to make it not a novel like I LOVED that book and CecilyPorter have joined the crowd of my beloved ships-they are up there with nicolibby, mayracal, and aldoregan for me and by now I’m sure you know how much I love those other 3-so yeah that probably says everything you need to know but I can’t wait to express more of my love of them to you later haha). I’m currently reading “Grow Your Own Optimist!” and loving it so far! 

-Amanda

hahaha never apologize! I'm so happy you enjoyed the stories and I'm never mad about getting to know which quotes you liked. I agree, "once it happens" is one of my favorite stories. I feel like that one might be the olivie brand in brief summation? just... about love and life and time and fate and also blowjobs and ice cream. anyway

OH I AM SO EXCITED ABOUT CLARA POSTING AGAIN. I can't wait for you guys to see the end of this season. I mean obviously you know by now I'm obsessed with chmura's art but also I'm pretty proud of how the story ends, because I never intended to keep writing in this universe and wasn't sure I could do a sequel that felt the same way, but I think (fingers crossed) I managed it. I'm really excited to show you the finished product!

[theedwardianone]

Tag 9 people you want to get to know better

Thank you so much for the tag @coline7373

First ship: Uhhhhhh, I’m not sure I even remember my first ship. I got into fandom and by extension shipping when I was 13 or 14 so a long time ago. I think it was Kingdom Hearts? Might have been something else?

Three ships: Definitly Codywan, this ship has my entire heart right now. Rexobi as well since it is very much occupying brain space since I am participating in the Big Bang. For the third I will be veering very off course and say Eddy/Venom. Don’t judge me please, somehow I have fallen neck deep into open symbrock fic tabs and I have no idea how it happened

Last song: Giantess of Ironwood by Bear McCreary. I’m absolutely in love with both God of War soundtracks and obsessively playing Ragnarok currently after finishing the first game for the first time. (Also hurdy gurdy my absolutely beloved)

Last Movie: Glass Onion. Loved it, adored it, still continuing to rave about it!

Currently reading: Fic? Unless you’re counting the articles I’ve been reading about 15th century astrology and astronomy as a preparation for the coming reenactment season in order to expand me and my fiancées camp/crafts/authentic skills/…

Currently consuming: Tea and toasted brioche with caramel spread. Having breakfast before work rn.

Currently craving: Golden syrup cake. I basically crave this 24/7 it’s so good but not easy to find outside of the UK. Excuse to go an a holiday, maybe?

No stress tags: @itsgoldleaf  @aeligsido  @maximalblaze  @laz-laz-ace-pilot  @smolqui-gon  anyone else who just feels like it