#i hate that fleabag never got a proper name

[avengers-rule103]

(i need to know if a fanfic exists where the priest chooses fleabag. i need to know if someone, anyone, has rewritten the ending, i need to KNOW. and i need to read it asap please. because i am still devestated. absolutey wrecked. "it'll pass" no, no it won't. give me my happy ending damn it.)

[rosethornewrites]

Fics I read this week

Some of these may have been read earlier than a week ago, but I tried to keep it contained. Not sure I’ll keep this up, but I’ll try.

Finished:

Rated E:

the origin of change, by kissteethstainred, rated E

Lan Xichen said, “Time for regrowth and mourning is, of course, the most important. But there has also been a—frequent—discussion of marriage.” He paused to drink more tea. He almost seemed apologetic when he added, “Your name has been brought up often.”

“For marriage,” Lan Wangji repeated.

Except with Wei Ying in the picture, nothing goes exactly as planned.

Opportunity, by brooklinegirl, rated E

Lan Zhan is jostled slightly and he turns in his seat to see a harried-looking man squeezing in next to him. There isn't an empty seat there, and the bar is quite crowded. "Sorry," the man says, sounding out of breath. "I know I'm all up in your business, I'll move, I promise, I just—" He blows his breath out. "I'm going to lose this seat next to you, that dude over there has been eyeing it, and it's mine as soon as this guy leaves.”

Rated M:

Oxymoron, by feline_somnambulist, rated M

Jiang Yanli was in the kitchen. She hummed softly along to music being played somewhere else in the house, as she shuffled carefully back and forth from the prep table to the giant vat of soup. The house smelled like pork rib and savory broth. As always, she was beautiful in her element, a goddess of her domain despite the limp and the leg brace.

Her phone rang just as Jiang Cheng entered the kitchen. She saw him and smiled as she made her careful way to the phone on the wall-mounted charging station.

Jiang Cheng put the stack of paperwork down on a counter. He got to the phone first, picked it up. It was Lan Wangji’s number. He rejected the call and put the phone in his pocket.

“A-Cheng? Is everything okay?” Jiang Yanli asked, a frown creasing her brow. “Who was that?”

It Ends With the Beginning, by feline_somnambulist, rated M

They fight. They part. Jiang Cheng is hurt. Wei Wuxian comes to help. Wei Wuxian runs. Jiang Cheng is tired of chasing. They fight.

Until The End, by abCEE, rated M

"When I -- when I tied my ribbon around our wrists, I knew what I was doing and I privately honored it." Wei Wuxian's brows continued to meet as he tried to understand where the conversation was going until realization dawned on him. "Wa -- wait! Lan Zhan, is it what I think it is?!!" "It is usually done at the end of a wedding ceremony --" "What-" "But it could have been acknowledged as an engagement." "Lan Zhan!" He cannot believe what he is hearing now. "But my ancestor revealed herself --" "And we bowed… three times. We bowed, Lan Zhan!"

In which wangxian are married since the Cold Pond Cave incident, knows how proper communication works, and had confessed in the middle of the Sunshot Campaign. Things went spiraling up and down from there.

Rated T:

as it should be, by Sienne, rated T

Post-canon Lan Qiren time travels to before the Cloud Recesses lectures. The Cloud Recesses are quiet and peaceful, something his home hasn't been in years. ...In fact, it is too quiet and peaceful.

Judgment Day, by Grace_Logan, rated T

Cornered Wei Wuxian sees only one way out after cluing in on the Jin's plan.

Welcome To Gusu, by perkynurples, rated T

Deep in the lush forests of Gusu hides an aging resort that hosts dozens of children every summer for an unforgettable couple of weeks. It’s where Lan Wangji grew up alongside Wei Wuxian, and when his childhood friend (for the lack of a better term) surprisingly returns years later in the position of Senior Counsellor, seemingly hell bent on causing the same kind of mischief that got him kicked out of Gusu in the first place, but also taller, broader and tanner than ever before, Lan Wangji knows he’s In Trouble. Or, this fic has it all: longing looks over campfires, found family dynamics, ill-timed skinny dipping, teenagers inappropriately shipping their counsellors, camp weddings...

Therapy is a Performative Act, by cinder1013, rated T

“What does your dad think of your comedy?”

“Oh, he hates it, but it pays the bills and I need it to pay for my goddamn fuckin’ therapy.”

Jiang Cheng stumbles into being a stand-up comic and his favorite topic is dear ol’ dad.

sorry, i love you, by moon_thief, rated T

lan wangji was practically seething as he watched it happen. what kind of person could be so careless, unruly, undisciplined-

and then their eyes met.

oh. oh.

Tremble a Prayer, by cqlorphan, rated T

They kiss, and Lan Wangji regulates himself. There are no tears pricking at his eyes. There is no lump in his throat. His hands are undressing Wei Ying, and then Wei Ying’s hands are on his hands.

“What is it?” Wei Ying says, between kisses.

Even with Wei Ying back, Lan Wangji's sadness overwhelms him at times. He tries, and fails, to keep it from him.

The Quiet Work, by ShipsAreLaunching, rated T

Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian get a summons for help from a minor clan in Gusu. When they go to investigate they find a horrible truth, and do what they do best.

Rated G:

Ink Stains Not So Ignored, by Preludian_Staves, rated G

Qiren found something that he still couldn't bring himself to ignore about his youngest nephew's husband.

I’d buy a big house where we both could live, by failed2be_chill, rated G

“Ah, so you want to play with the rabbits and enjoy their soft fur and silly little nose twitches while your poor husband toils in the heat of the day with hammer and nail doing exhausting manual labour. I see how it is. It’s a good job I love you, huh?” Wei Wuxian kisses his husband’s soft cheek.

“Mn, very good.”

---

Or, married WangXian embrace the practical and symbolic joys of home ownership. Domestic bliss.

Family, by Speechless_since_1998, rated G

Jiang Cheng blinked as his brother while he played with the baby he was holding.

He hoped he had misunderstood, but he had proof that it was true right in front of him.

So he did the only sensible thing that came to mind, "Wei Ying, what the fuck ?! '

"A-Cheng, language!" Shijie scolded him with a stern look.

"A-Jie, you can't really accept such a thing!"

"Why not? He is so cute!" she said, making funny faces at the child, totally in love with him.

Was it possible that he was the only one with a bit of mental sanity left?

A Lonely Guqin (No More), by Asphodel_Meadow, rated G

Wei Wuxian is the first person who makes Lan Wangji want to have a duet.

piercing, by escapingaugust, rated G (read the tags)

Stolen Midnights, by hinotoriii, rated G

There are nights where sleep eludes Wei Wuxian. Where the demons of his past are too loud in his mind, reminding him of that which he could never forget, second life or not.

Unfinished:

Not Rated:

Disclosed Regrets, by zLanWuxian, Not Rated

The majority of the cultivation world are pulled into a room that suspiciously resembled the burial mounds. (Their golden cores were sealed too. As to why, nobody knew.)

They are invited to watch Wei Wuxian's life.

What will they do when they find out everything they believed was a lie?

(Or: The characters of Mo Dao Zu Shi watch Mo Dao Zu Shi)

Rated E:

Where You Fell, by Sweet_William, rated E

Years ago, Lan Wangji was a Senior in high school, readying himself for graduation and the coming years studying at the Gusu Lan Institute of Music. Everything in his life made sense, from his role in his family, to a future as a classical musician. The only thing that didn’t fit was the sudden epiphanies he had about himself brought on by his bothersome and flirtatious classmate, Wei Wuxian. When the growing attraction and friendship was cut short by the other boy’s disappearance, he mourned what could have been, but ultimately had to move on. What he didn’t know was that fate would bring them back together again one day, or the reality of how far apart two lives can diverge, how some can find peace and prosperity, while others can fall farther than he ever imagined.

A Narrow Bridge, by FrameofMind and Jo Lasalle (Jo_Lasalle), rated E

Once, Lan Wangji made a choice to step aside. Ten years after Wei Ying’s death, he finds a way back to choose again.

Setting fire to our insides, by StarsAlignNomore, rated E

Lan Wangji dies after the thirty-third strike. Lan Xichen does not handle it well.

*fleabag voice* This is a fix it.

Rated M:

Live Again, Love Anew, by kkanime5555, rated M

“Lan Zhan.” Wei Wuxian finally speaks up.

“Mn.” Lan Zhan hums to show he’s listening.

“I think we traveled back in time.”

...

“I’ll go, Lan Zhan. I’ll come to Gusu with you.”

-----

Or,

Lan Zhan and Wei Ying are soulmates and, upon Wei Ying's death, they are sent back to when they first met as kids on the streets of Yiling. From there, they both are taken to Gusu, where they are raised together, gradually learning of their shared feelings and finding out the mystery of who sent them back in time and why, all while planning how to save the world, preferably with all their loved ones left alive.

A Torn Red Ribbon, by shiroakuma, rated M

The night before they marched into the Nightless City, Lan Wangji was invited to join Wei Wuxian in his tent.

Unbeknownst to him at that time, it became their last real conversation.

In which, a resounding victory against the QishanWen Sect is won seemingly at the cost of Wei Wuxian's life. Lan Wangji still spends some time being heavily injured. Lan Xichen tries to pick the pieces left behind by the war. The Jiang Sect is renowned thanks to the revered Wei Wuxian and the cultivation world is plagued by unknown forces while Lan Wangji meets with Wei Wuxian in his dreams.

Sacrifices Made with Blood, by NocturnalFriend, rated M

Lan Wangji knew it was too late, there was too much blood on Wei Ying's hands already. Still, if he asked his brother for help, surely. There was a way to rescue the man who held his heart?

Or: Trust is not easily given and all to easily shattered. Lan Wangji learns this in the worst way, when Lan Xichen gives into the demands of the cultivation world. Although nobody could have predicted the whims of fate, giving them another chance at righting things.

What makes you sing?, by Fictio, rated M

Madam Yu was never known for her matchmaking skills but she was known for her inherent meddling. Though it still came as a surprise, when on one fine Saturday afternoon, she called Wei Ying and set him up for a blind date.

There She Rose, by Aiiiru, rated M

Many years had passed yet whispers and gossips about YiLing Matriarch still stayed alive like unruly weeds refusing to die.

"That damn Wei Wuxian must have cursed this year's harvest with 'unkillable' locusts" "But Wei Wuxian had died right?" "Didn't you know that her body wasn't found?" "I heard some cultivators saying that during the chaos, some people saw her leaving in a sword, flying away with someone else." "That must be the demon with whom she signed a contract, a female challenging three thousand or was it five thousand cultivators by herself? Hah!! She definitely has ties with evil creatures and ghosts." "I heard from my cousin in Yunmeng that YiLing Matriarch was born shameless." "Some say she was a male but took female form to seduce the ghosts of burial mounds and gain power by starting demonic cultivation" "Shhh! Don't talk so loudly! My cousin knew a man who loudly gossiped about Yilling Matriarch only to be cursed to death the next day"

Visitations, by Vir_Abelasan, rated M

"Wei Ying-" Lan Zhan says, stutters, "I'm sorry."

And now Wei Wuxian sees it, the red rimming Lan Zhan's eyes, the rumpled edges of his blazer. There is an old, familiar urge for him to reach over, to hold Lan Zhan's hand and smooth his hair, to tell him that everything will be fine.

"We're all a bit sorry about this, I think," he says instead, and finds that he means it. For Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji and everyone else in that Guanyin temple, the pain must be unbearably fresh, like skin just flayed open. But Wei Wuxian's chest had been cracked open a long time ago, his wounds licked and cauterized and sewn shut over five long years - Ever hurting, but a dull, constant ache, "It's really alright, Lan Zhan."

Five years after being accused of corporate espionage and losing everything, the Guanyin Scandal breaks open and Wei Wuxian finds a familiar face at his door.

Kiss My Wounds, Bless My Scars, by Pegunicent, rated M

When he is sixteen, Lan Wangji makes a choice. He becomes Wei Ying's bride.

Rated T:

the one where Jiang Yanli visits (and she's a fucking goddess), by ShippersList, rated T (part 4 of a series)

Wei Wuxian’s sister was a fucking goddess so it was a travesty she wasn’t being fucked like a goddess deserved.

Luo Qingyang decided to do something about it.

(Also, family feels and some plotting but that's beside the point.)

obscured in the shade of the willow, bathed in the light of the moon, by cloud_wanderer, rated T

Wei Wuxian leaves the Burial Mounds for the first time to attend his martial brother's wedding, and everything changes from there. (a.k.a. a universe in which Nie Huaisang schemes to thwart Jin Guangshan's plans and ends up saving Wei Wuxian and the Wens in the process)

Wei Wuxian meets Xiao Xingchen and helps found a sect in Yiling.

Inchoate, by Marinelifeclub, rated T

“Where would you even go once you left? Wait a few more years before leaving." persuaded Jiang Fengmian,

“Will I live to see that long?” Wei Wuxian whispered under his breath.

Jiang Fengmian felt cold at those words. He always thought his children would be the ones to heal the scars left by their mother on Wei Wuxian, but just the concise way he spoke about them, he knows that wasn’t true. Now his best friend’s son sat in front of him, confessing to not thinking he will live to see himself become a man. Cangse and Changze must be furious in their graves as the sweet smiling son they raised endured pain because of a jealous woman and a cowardly man. Sighing, he did the only thing he could to make things right and accepted the boy’s wishes.

At age 14, Wei Wuxian left Lotus Pier and never looked back.

Wei Wuxian leaves Lotus Pier and while things change something’s are just set in fate.

Here We Go Again, by Alliandra, rated T

He looked over to where the swordswoman was still fighting, but her focus seemed entirely locked onto that fight so it was unlikely that she could have had anything to do with the energy drain. He was still wracking his brain for something else to do to assist, so this thing didn’t kill them both, but now he was feeling weak, dizzy and currently not far from helpless.

~~~~~~~~~~

It has been several months since the events at the Guanyin temple and Wei Wuxian is wandering around on his own. After he helps a stranger kill a very dangerous beast he uncovers what seems to be a conspiracy aimed at ending his life. He heads back to Cloud Recesses with his new companion in tow, looking to get Lan Wanji's help in working out what is involved.

Meanwhile, Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling made a surprising discovery under Koi Tower that may well be linked to the threat against Wei Wuxian's life.

Can they all work together to find out what is going on and put a stop to it, before something disastrous occurs?

Nie Huaisang's Ten Steps to Fix The Fucked Up Reality, by cosmic_zephyr (ProudHaikyuuTrash)

1. Find the time travel array in the Nie library 2. Convince (manipulate) Wei Wuxian to use demonic cultivation to activate the array. 3. Transmigrate to the body of your 15-year-old selves with Wei Wuxian and Survive his wrath. 4. Come up with yet another exaggerated, slightly concerning, plan to save Lotus Pier, Dafan Wens and your brother. 5. Use Empathy to make the Wen siblings side with you in the mess that is soon to come. 6. Kill the main Wen family and make Wen Qing the new leader of Qishan Wen so innocent people are not killed. 7. Annoy the hell out of Lanling Jin just for funsies and also a political statement because Jin Guangshan can suck it. 8 Preferably, just for your own sanity, find a way to kill Jin Guangshan and Jin Guangyao. 9. Work with Wei Wuxian and Wen Qing to solve the sabre problem of the Nie clan. 10. Live a happy life with your brother alive and the cultivation world not being the huge fucked up mess in your own time-line. P.S. Matchmake the pining pile of disaster and gay aka Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji.

Aka canon divergence where Nie Huaisang and Wei Wuxian (and Lan Wangji) travel back in time and save the cultivation world.

Deal, by Rahar_Moonfire, rated T

Nie Huaisang wants revenge for his brother. He also wants his friend Wei Wuxian back. Lan Wangji left the Cultivation World after Wei Wuxian's death and hasn't been heard from since. It's a good thing Nie Huaisang has spies everywhere. He has everything he needs to put his plan into motion: the notes, the instructions, the "willing body," and the patience to pull it all off.

Now he just needs to be sure Wei Wuxian survives long enough to pick up Nie Huaisang's bread crumbs, solve the puzzle, and shatter the Cultivation World again. The only person suitable for that job is Black Jade of Yiling, the husband of the infamous Yiling Patriarch, Lan Wangji.

Rated G:

Hadn't gone as I planned, by hamlets_ghost, rated G (part of a series)

Lan Xichen leaves the Cloud Recesses with Wei Wuxian and Wangji to meet his mother.

He cannot stay.

[continuation of 'Hold on to your heart']

[smokeybrand]

Smokey brand Movie Reviews: You Should See Me in a Crown

I’m not a massive fan of the classic Sherlock Holmes tales. I’ve read them all and appreciate the legacy and what they’ve inspired in other works, but they’ve never been my favorite tales. I actually enjoy the various interpretations and re-imaginings much more than the core mythos. I like RDJ’s take in film and the more modern spin with Elementary but, by far, my favorite rendition of Sherlock was the BBC version that made Benadryl Cumquatt a star. That show is inspired, at least the first two seasons, and it blessed me with one of the greatest television villains i have ever had the pleasure of witnessing; Andrew Scott’s Moriarty. My goodness, is he the greatest adaption of that villain! He even looks the part. I say all of this because Enola Holmes dropped today on Netflix. It’s a completely different take on the Holmes mythos centering on Sherlock’s younger sister, Enola and starring Millie Bobby Brown of Stranger Things fame. This is her vehicle, i think she’s producing it, so I'm curious how well it’ll fare. These Stranger kids are all growing up and trying to transition into adult stardom. Finn Wolfhard is doing fine and Millie seems to be taking things into her own hands. Let’s see in those hands are steady enough to push her into the next phase of her career.

The Good

I’m not one for that old timey Victorian aesthetic but i can appreciate the effort it must take to give it life in the modern age. The costumes and sets in this thing are exquisite. This is gorgeous and meticulously crafted film.

This film’s direction is pretty okay. The narrative, itself, leaves a lot to be desired but what is presented, has been deftly constructed. Credit to Harry Bradbeer for that. Dude has directed a few episodes of both Fleabag and Killing Eve so he’s got the chops. I just wish the fare this time was a little more substantial so he could really sink his chops into it.

This cast is loaded. There are several names in supporting roles worth note. Adeel Akhtar, Fiona Shaw, Frances de la Tour, and Susie Wokama all make memorable appearances. Louis Partridge is a little flaccid in the love interest role but he does enough to distract.

Millie Bobby Brown makes this movie. Her Enola Holmes is brilliant, witty, and full of that ardent, rebellious, energy all teenage girls are filled with. Though er story is one of mystery and intrigue, it is, first and foremost, kind of a coming-of-age tale. Brown does a decent job carrying this film and never falters in the same space as older, seasoned, actors like Helena Bonham Carter and Fiona Shaw.

Henry Cavill is basically playing Superman. His Sherlock Holmes is easily the weakest I've ever seen. Dude simply doesn’t have the chops to pull this off. I might be judging him too harshly considering the caliber of actor to have filled this role and made it their own in recent times. These are big shoes to fill but they fit ill on Cavill. This ain’t his story so we don’t really get to see that brilliant deduction but i don’t know that he could have pulled it off even if we did.

Helena Bonham Carter as the Holmes matriarch, Eudoria, is a pleasure. She steals every scene she’s in, even if there aren’t many. The Mrs. Holmes is mostly absent but the specter of her charisma permeates every facet of this film and it’s very welcomed. I just wish there was more of her.

Sam Caflin’s Mycroft Holmes is a very interesting take on the character. Dude is effectively the villain of this narrative. He’s out to force Enola into doing everything she doesn’t want. Dude is the overbearing pops or whatever. It’s awkward seeing Mycroft this way but he is ably portrayed by Caflin so i don’t have too big an issue with him.

The Bad

This thing exudes female energy. It is every bit Enola’s story. Now, I'm not too mad at that. Millie is decent in the role and it is unmistakably her film but that is, in this current climate, very abrasive to some. There is a strong feminist slant in how this narrative is presented and that might turn a lot of people off, depending on if they feel that is “controversial” or not.

There is just SO much exposition in this thing. It’s the nature of the genre, cats have to talk there way through problems or whatever but I've seen this part of these types of stories done much better. Sherlock, for example, found a way to visualize this and did it very well in the first two seasons. This film does not do that. It’s not super terrible but it did take me out of the story a little bit.

The music in this is very distracting. There aren’t many scene where the narrative just let’s you breathes. There’s always a whimsical swell or a punctuation flare to emphasize a shot. This feels like a callow tactic to give more levity and agency to the film where there really isn’t any to be had.

The writing in this is kind of weak. I thought, with how everything was progressing, that it might have been written by several people bu it wasn’t. One person crafted this tale; Jack Thorne. I’m really familiar with the bulk of his work but, if it’ anything like this, i imagine his is an underwhelming catalog.

This thing doesn’t feel like a movie. It feels like a series or that it should have been a series. I don’t see how this thing could have succeeded in the theater and it should count it’s blessings it found a home on Netflix because this definitely would have flopped. This thing feels like a proper Netflix movie, not a Hollywood outing.

As if to dive my previous point home, this is definitely sequel fodder. This film was made with several to follow in mind. Enola Holmes is a whole ass book series so there is definitely material to be had there. There’s six book so content isn’t lacking but i kind of feel like that ending should have felt a little more finite. This cash grab attempt at film universes and sequel bait is the most disingenuous sh*t ever outside of microtransactions in games and i kind of hate it. It’s wild to see everyone release sub-par entries on the hope they can patch the sh*t with sequels but everyone forgets that Iron Man was exceptional. It’s easily the third best MCU film and was the first to release. That first film has to be solid enough to bare the weight of a entire franchise and Enola Holmes ain’t doing that level of heavy lifting.

This film wears it’s Young Adult categorization like a badge of honor. You can tell this film is just a step and a half up from the likes of Riverdale or Nancy Drew. As a grown as man, this was not for me and i understand that very well. That said, it falls into that same, tropey, nothingness that the worst of the YA genre is known for, which is all the more reason this should have been a serial not a film. It’s not aggressive in it’s cliche but, if you’ve seen as many films as i have, you pick up on it immediately. For me, that’s the biggest issue with the film but for others. it might not even be worth mentioning.

The Verdict

Enola Holmes is a very cute, but flawed, viewing experience. It’s an interesting take on the Sherlock formula, injected with all of the GRRRL power you’d expect from a film starring a teenage woman in the lead. It’s not pretentious or forceful about it’s messaging but you definitely understand that there is a message it wants to convey. Millie Bobby Brown is excellent as Enola, easily the second best thing about this movie after the scenery chewing Bonham Carter, and there are some strong supporting performances. Cavill is a miss as Sherlock and Mycroft might as well be a mustache twirling villain but, in service to this particular narrative, the change in character makes sense. The film, itself, is ably directed and it’s a legitimately gorgeous watch but there are severe shortcomings. The writing is pedestrian, the plot is cliche, and to cover up these weaknesses, the music is leaned on too heavily. The foremost mystery isn’t one of true merit, i figured it out about halfway through, and it eschews the real conundrum for later time. The whole premise of this movie delivers a relatively intriguing situation but that is left for a later film to resolve and i kind of hate it. Sh*t was mad bogus. None of these issues are very pressing but they are noticeable and, at times, a little grating. Still, i was never bored and it is a rather well put together film, overall, even if it does feel like it should have been a proper miniseries. Enola Holmes is worth a watch but, understand, mileage may vary. I thought there was potential going forward but this thing should have definitely been a series and not a film.

[just-a-touch-of-sass-and-fandoms]

Sanity is Relative Chapter 7

Catch up on this series!! 

Characters: Darby, Ema, Sam, and Dean

Word Count: 2050

Written by @uttertrash--butlikecutetrash and @just-a-touch-of-sass-and-fandoms

Chapter Seven

Dean

Ema and Darby didn’t even hear us leave. We got halfway down the hall, and  hit Sam in the chest. “You make up with her?”

“Yes. We figured it all out. We’re on good terms.”

“Well good,” I smiled. “Because if you piss her off, then you piss Darby off, and then you piss me off, and we both know how that goes.” When Sam rolled his eyes I just laughed it off. “But what I do want to know is how they got your file.”

Sam stopped dead in his tracks. “Did we lock the door back up after we broke into the records room yesterday?”

I bit my lip and thought for a moment, “No?” Sam sighed and shook his head. “But what business did those two have breaking into that room?”

Sam waved his arm broadly between the two of us, “And what business do we have breaking into that room?”

“We are trying to find “information” for this “hunt”.” I clarified in a smug tone.

“What’s with the air quotes dude?”

I stopped walked and turned to look at my little brother. His eyes were sunken in, he looked more miserable than I had ever seen him, his hair was greasy and unkempt. I chewed a bit at the inside of my mouth before I answered. “I don’t think there is a job here. I think you made it up to get help,” Sam opened his mouth to speak but I just kept right on talking, “and that’s fine. But I think we are searching for nothing because you are trying to keep me happy in a situation I don’t really want to be in.”

“What about the power surges? The staff disappearances? What about that night that we were knocked onto our asses by… something.” Sam shook his head and sighed.

I just shrugged at him, “Coincidence?”

“Okay,” Sam exhaled before moving closer to me, his mouth next to my ear, “but what I want to know is how in the hell Ema knew about Jess.”

My head snapped to the side, my brow furrowing as I stared at Sam. “Is that why you called her a schizo? Because she brought up Jess?” Sam’s eyes dropped to the floor. He weakly nodded causing me to scoff and give him a quick snack to the chest. “Dude, she’s probably just psychic and doesn’t realize it.”

“What?”

“Psychic.” I repeated, “Did it happen after she touched you?” Sam nodded. “Dude, she isn’t schizophrenic, she is unknowingly psychic and they tossed her in the looney bin because of it. Mystery solved.”

I continued to make my way down the hall to my room. It wasn’t as cozy as my room in the bunker but it would do for now. Until Sammy gets his head on straight again. And if in the meantime I flirt mercilessly with Darby to pass the time, then so be it.

I could hear Sam taking long strides behind me to catch up. Once we made it to my room he spoke again.

“She still sees people that aren’t there.”

I shrugged and flopped onto the bed. The mattress was hard and shitty, definitely not memory foam.

“So she is psychic and schizophrenic. I dunno dude.”

Sam ran his hands through his hair as he began to pace. “I know nothing about this girl and now her and your new girlfriend know way too much about me.”

“New girlfriend? Darby is not my girlfriend.”

In proper Sam fashion my brother rolled his eyes and let out a judgmental sigh. “Oh so you two spent all night together last night talking?”

“We did actually.” I said as I crossed my arms. Sam gave me a disbelieving look. “We did! Most of the time she just kept telling me I was a smug asshole and that I annoyed her.”

Sam pinched at the top of the bridge of his nose, “If she thinks you are annoying and smug, why did you spend all night with her?”

“It wasn’t all night. It was just until lights out…” Sam narrowed his eyes and looked at me like a disapproving mother. “Because I kind of like the fact that she hates me. I dunno man. The mean shit she says is enjoyable. Last chick who talked to me like that was Jo, but even Jo was nicer than Darby is.”

“That’s fucked up, Dean. Even for you.”

I smiled slightly and shrugged, “Maybe, but it’s fun.”

Sam let out a groan and layed down at the foot of my bed, the springs in the mattress cried out under his weight. He ran his hands up and down his face and sighed. As he was lost in what I could only assume was deep thought, I pulled out the two manila folders I had hidden under my pillow. I placed one on Sam’s stomach and patted it.

“There you go little brother. Mysterious Ema’s file.”

Sam looked down at the folder and then back to me, “When?”

“Yesterday,” I stated as I opened the other file in hand, “when we were looking I came across Ema and Darby’s…. So I took them.”

Sam sat up and opened the file, “How did you even know their last names?”

I licked my lips quick and spoke in a quieter tone, “The night we found those pieces of shit trying to…” Fire rose inside of me and I exhaled trying to calm myself. “I read their names on the police report.”

Sam just nodded before becoming fully engrossed in the file. “Ema Lucille Hansen… who are you?”

Finally looking down at Darby’s records, I was met with a picture paper clipped to the inside. I let out a low whistle as I looked it over.  “Darby Geraldine Declan.”

The photo had to be at least five years old. She was wearing an old, holey Jimi Hendrix T-shirt and torn black jeans. Her long, dark hair was swept to the side and she was smiling widely. But her eyes… the smile never made it to them. I noticed too that her arms were covered in far less scars than they are now. What sort of life was she leading that she felt the need to mar herself is such a way?

I put the photo back and started to read.

“Her dad was artist Gerald Declan. He….”

“He was an abstract artist who was at the height of his fame when he killed himself in a gallery. Called it his last great masterpiece.” Sam said, looking up from the folder in front of him.

I blinked at him in shock. “How did you even know all that?”

Sam went to speak but was cut off by a voice from the doorway.

“Obviously, your brother takes girls on dates to art museums.”

I looked passed Sam to see Darby leaning against the doorway. Her long, slender body propped against the frame of the door. Her hair tied back in a messy bun. A small, unamused smile playing on her lips.

“Am I right?” She asked, tucking a piece of stray hair behind her ear, “you go on dates to art museums?” Sam nodded. Her grin spread a little bit, “Damn, I love being right.” She started to walk away but quickly turned back, “Oh, and he hung himself in his art studio that happened to be upstairs from the gallery. And his death wasn’t his last great masterpiece….” Darby exhaled quietly and I watched as a small tear snuck down her cheek, “I was…” She let out a small chuckle and waved, “You boys enjoy looking through our files. Hope you find what you are looking for.”

Then she just left.

———

Darby

I swiped at the tears rolling down my cheeks and I pulled my blankets up tighter to my chin.

“Will there ever be a time in my life when I don’t cry uncontrollably when my father is brought up?” I ask aloud to the walls of my room.

“I didn’t talk for a few months after my mom died.” A voice said quietly from the doorway.

I turned my head slightly and saw Dean standing just inside my room. He chewed a little on his bottom lip and stared at the floor before he spoke again.

“Look,” He said with a weak smile and a scratch at the back of his head, “I know you don’t like me around, but I just… you looked upset when you left so I wanted to check on you.”

Unsure of what to say next I just kind of blinked at him. With tight lips and a nod he headed back out the door. But an empty pang in my gut hit me and I don’t know why but I couldn’t watch him leave.

“Dean!” I called out and he poked his head back into the room, “Stay. Please.” That stupid grin of his was back as he walked in and sat down on the floor opposite of me. “Don’t look so smug.”

He made a face of fake shock, “Me? Smug? Never.”

I glared at him which only caused Dean to smile wider. Just this big, cat-ate-the-canary grin, the corners of his eyes crinkling with it. I wanted to remain glaring but I couldn’t. Even with tear stained cheeks I couldn’t help but chuckle and smile back at him.

“So tell me about your dad.”

So I did. I told him everything I could possibly think of about my father, my mother, my life growing up. And Dean did the same. Our stories were almost uncomfortably similar. Parent dies suddenly and tragically, remaining parent goes a bit off the deep end and relies a bit too heavily on alcohol to cope. We both moved constantly as our living parents drifted from one place to the other dragging us with them. The only real differences were that my mom shacked up with rich boyfriend after rich boyfriend leaving me to raise myself while Dean’s dad dragged them from fleabag motel to fleabag motel, leaving Dean to raise himself and Sam.

At this point, I had slid off my bed and sat down on the floor with Dean. Still cocooned in my blankets I watched his face as he told his story. Every word that left his lips I hung from, utterly fascinated by his life of tragedies and misadventures.

“But wait,” I interrupted, “what I’m still confused about is how the fire started that killed your mom.”

Dean’s face grew serious. His big, green eyes searched my face before he spoke again.

“She was murdered by a demon.”

I shook my head and blinked, “I’m sorry, a what?”

“A demon.” He sighed, “His name was Azazel.”

“Azazel… Like from the Bible?”

“Kind of….”

I looked away from Dean’s face then, exhaling in shock. He does suffer Folie à deux with Sam.

“I what?”

“What?” I asked, confused.

Dean narrowed his eyes at me, his lips creating a thin line. His nostrils flared as he spoke, “I suffer what with Sam?”

I let out a nervous chuckle, “Shit, that was supposed to be internal monologue.” The unamused look on Dean’s face intensified and I shrank a little bit more into my blankets. “Your records said you suffer Folie à deux with Sam. The madness of two.”

Dean scoffed and rolled his eyes. He began to pick at a callus on his palm. His tongue darted over his bottom lip. It was slightly chapped but still somehow managed to look soft and plush…

….Darby stop thinking like that.

“We aren’t crazy.” Dean said defiantly, his voice rougher than normal. “Sam and I… We have been through a lot, but we aren’t crazy.”

“Dean, your brother talks to Satan.”

Dean shrugs, “Okay, so Sam is a little crazy but he’s getting better.”

He continued to pick at the calluses on his hands, eyes never returning to my face. Even when I put my hand on his shoulder.

“The only monsters that exists are other humans. The only demons in this world are the ones inside ourselves.”

Dean let out a laugh then, finally turning to look at me. A small, sad smile playing on his perfect mouth. “Oh Darby. I wish that was true.”

Sanity Tags

@growingupgeek @emoryhemsworth @love-kittykat21 @oneshoeshort @supernatural-fangirl13 @wayward-ella @bunnybaby121115 @kazkingdom @winchesterprincessbride

[loudlydecadentkryptonite-blog]

Harold

“What the fuck Harold!” Janey pulled up her garment over her chest as she caught a glimpse of the next door neighbor’s head clearing the window sill. “You have a ton of nerve!”, she spat at him as his finger pushed back the Cheez Whiz snots that came driveling out of a pig-like sobbing snout. “I just wanted to talk . . . alone.”, the fat boy whined in a low monotone. “Just get the Hell out of here before I call the cops!”, she yelled hopping up and down like some preteen little bitch. The ladder scrapped loudly for a long instant then fell into silence for a half of a moment until the sound of a deadened impact on turf accompanied by another louder whine relieved the tension giving the young woman pause to laugh. “Serves you right you big moron!” The whimpering died away as the top of the ladder reappeared bobbing away to the house down the street off the half acre property that engulfed Janey’s abode.

How long would she have to contend with this big ‘lunk’ she wondered to herself. This was the third time this week that he had run into her! But of course this time it had become a little too up close and personal for her liking. The idea that some three-hundred and fifty pound moron was actively stalking her did not sit well. The rat probably got a good clear look at her pussy? Thank God she didn’t believe in shaving down there. She could see those big rubber lips of his slobbering spit as he talked. She trying to stay an arms length the other day on the sidewalk rolling her cart past the old claptrap fleabag apartments that he supposedly played fix-it man and building ‘super’. There was nothing but a bunch of cheap drunks and old ‘down and outer’s’ in the twelve rundown flats. By seven at night everyone must have been blotto each Friday drinking themselves to death. All of course, save for Harold who was always hanging out watching. Peering into neighborhood windows that he shouldn’t have. Janie was surprised he hadn’t been shot by now?

As a rule she’d be going out to the restaurant to work the midnight shift but tonight they only needed her til ten as they were going to shut down early to fix some pipes that were leaking bad. The guy in the bar name Bill always showed up just after midnight had always given her a ride home at the end of her shift without being grabby. She liked that about him. All these other damn cowboys must have had mothers that were octopuses as their hands were always wandering. Too bad she had sworn off men years back? The last customer was politely kicked out by 9:45 PM and the doors locked and lights out some fifteen minutes later. She hated to walk in the dark! But she wasn’t going to blow her measly night’s pay on a taxi. “Fucking bitch!”, she countered to the wind as she felt the first drops of rain upon her face as she was halfway down the first of seven blocks that she head to traverse. Well the good thing about rain is it might keep all the low lives in the pens. She clip clopped away into the darkness the occasional flash of occasional twin headlight beams of car headlamps making up for the absence of proper street lighting.

The seventh of the nine blocks reached she was soaked to the skin and feeling cold and uncomfortable. She thought about the Winter fur that had found its way to the pawn shop when she suffered a dry spell in the work department  several months back. This Salvation Army special cloth coat wasn’t worth shit in a light breeze. The light’s were dimmed in the back of the crummy old apartment that Harold  hung about. The rest of the windows looked more like carved hollows from a skull. The frequency of her pace picked up as she felt a pair of eyes that she could not see were staring at her. “God damn it!”, she said, “I hate this!” She turned to look over her left shoulder to see if there were any telltale shadows extending from the edge of the building that might be cast by one of the outside entry lights. But there was nothing. She was almost past the opposite end of the long swayback looking ‘cheez box’ when her heel hit a patch of broken cement and she went tumbling down to her knees with a loud screech. “Shit!”, she ranted bent over on both hands, I tore my goddamned stockings!” A big hand grabbed her shoulder and she let out another scream but this time much louder. The next thing she knew all had gone blank.

She woke up feeling sort of groggy wondering why she couldn’t see anything there being no light where ever she was. A rank smell of an old mildewed mattress swirled up into her nostrils. She tried to sit up but a big arm was laying on top of her like a tree trunk. Another odor of unwashed undershorts and rotten eggs hit her as the owner of the trunk moved his bare hairy leg over the two of hers. Harold was laying almost on top of her. A wave of anger hit her like an instantaneous burning fury but was extinguish equally fast when his weight shifted even more on top of her. ‘Hello!’ Harold mewed. “I love being this cozy, don’t you?” Janey felt like retching. This fat oily bastard was basically pinning her on a bare mattress in God knows what part of that decrepit shack of an apartment. His damp flabby abdomen nearly squeezing the air out of her diaphragm. he was wearing what had once been a T-shirt but seemed more like an oily rag three sizes too small and an incredibly rank stained set of briefs. “Let me up, will you!”, she said in a firm but even tone voice. Harold rolled off her a bit and she pulled herself out from under him and rose off the edge of the mattress. The room was not completely dark but dim. As she rose she hit her head and fell back onto her behind. Immediately two big hands swept around her chest and pressed hard around her breasts the fingertips seeking out the vertical fissure of the blouse. “You’ve got nice ‘tata’s”, Harold cooed in a childish tone. “I want to feel them, okay?” With that he pulled her bloused open one set of fingers pulling at her bra yanking that upward.

Before she could protest he had the jumble of the two pulled up to her neck over her face. “Ha ha ha!”, Harold crowed, “Are you ticklish?” And with that started grabbing at her flanks and belly and breasts pinching hard and poking as she tried to roll back and forward and away! As she strained to escape the rumpled clothing still half over her neck and elbow his hand yanked at the fron of her jeans and pulled them almost over her ass. The white of her buttocks subdivided by her crack was the target of the forefinger of the other hand as it joined the first pulling her panties along with her pants down past her knees. “My your so white and pretty!”, Harold sighed in a breathy exhale.  “I just want to touch you in places that I never touched before. A shiver came over Jainey now as having no other alternative to quickly break free she had to toss off her top garments to completely untangle her arms from their grip. “No!”, she spat firmly back, “I don’t want you to touch me anywhere!” “You don’t have the right to!” She twisted around almost out of his grip now with her ankles fouled in the folded over scrunch of her jeans and panties. His hands tightly gripped upon her ankle and one calf. She could see that a malevolent petulant frown was quickly forming on his face. “But I want to!”, he snarled.

She could feel his eyes upon her. Sweeping across her pointy little breasts to her abdomen quickly pumping air in and out like a small bellows. She felt them widen when they stopped at he crotch. “I wanta do it!”, he spat back” “Let’s do it, I never have!” Janey was at that point where escape was at best improbable. But the thought of this dirty foul smelling pig on top of her pushing his greasy dick inside her was unthinkable. She looked quickly from side to side carefully trying to see if there was something in arms reach that she could use to defend herself. His frustration at a boiling point he rolled forward and released the calf leaning hard over her thigh to grab at one of her arms to pull her to him. Her right hand darted back towards him her fingers cupped cat-like exposing her nails as she instinctively clawed at his bare arm. “Owww!” he hollered like some five year old! “You hurt me!” Her eyes opened wide startled by the fact that he had now taken a better grip upon her. They sat for a moment both frozen looking at each other. “I don’t want you to hurt me anymore!”, he blubbered. “So now I am going to have to tie you up!” With that he began to wind some clothes line around her captured wrist and then violently flipping her around in the opposite direction capturing her other wrist and tying the two tightly behind her. She tried to shake him off pulling and struggling as mightily as she could but he managed in a short while to have her laying face down on the stinking mattress with legs tied apart on its corners as her arms strained trying to break the bonds behind her back.

She kept rolling and struggled as much as was humanly possible until he felt his palm ram down hard on her lower back. “Pussie!”, he drooled as his other hand jammed down between her sweaty ass cheeks skipping into her anus for an instant then finding the back passage of her vagina opening. She grunted hard in pain as he tried to stuff her with a couple of his stubby fingers. “Tight!” he proclaimed with a leer. All she could think about in the instant was where was some unexpected hero with a gun like in a movie that could blow this asshole’s head off! The dirty motherfucker was trying to rip her opening apart with his thick fingers to stick his weasel into her. She could feel the tip of it bobbling around between her own asshole and her crotch trying to find purchase to find it’s way in. The room seemed to fill with a rotten smell of fishy foul breath as he began to grunt a harder and harder. The full weight of his whale-like blubber upon her. “Help!”, she began to scream at the top of her lungs mindlessly, “Help, someone!” “Please help me!” There was a smashing sound from somewhere close and the crash of a door being violently knocked open. Janey felt the weight of her rapist shift to his arms as he rose upward startled by the intervention. A loud bang followed by the immediate spray of something hit her like a blast of wind from a monsoon. The full weight of her aggressor fell flat upon her and then slid over to the side of the mattress with a bloody tangled stump of gore where there had been a head. She looked up into the blinding glare of a bright light.

“Are you alright maam?”, a male voice drawled? A figure came around into view on the opposite side of her and set about untying the ropes. The flashlight turned away revealing a police officer with his gun still drawn gripped in his right hand and his flashlight in the left. “Thank God that your friend Bill called the station and told us he hadn’t seen you tonight and that he thought that you might be in some danger!”, the other voice now disembodied said. Yeah, she said silently to herself. “Thank god! for Bill!”