#i hate james bond on principle bc it's just

[chrispineofficial]

I would recommend cheesey 70s/80s sci fi because it's generally less serious: like the back to the future trilogy or the original superman movie with Christopher reeve (I believe that one is on Netflix). For more contemporary things, I quite like the x-men movies (with a few exceptions, also "Logan" is really sad) as well as fun spy movies (the new bond films, Jason Bourne, etc)

ok so here’s another annoying thing about me: i do not get excited by retro action films at all in the least. needs to be big explosions and pretty colors and super realistic crazy beautiful

[starlight-starwrites]

agent whiskey

character headcanons

note: did a rewatch of kingsman golden circle, so...how could i resist? i really started out with ‘this is fun!’ and then things got real. again, i like to think most of what is here is inspired straight from what we see in the movie, and some go a little beyond bc if we’re honest, those writers did our jack dirty.

- Has a known streak for being an asshole, but he doesn’t usually even realize it.

- He thinks he’s funny (he is, but only sometimes).

- The man loves the high life. Country livin’ is fine by him, but high country living. He was sent to work in New York for a reason.

- He is great at mixing his attitude and his manners. He’s usually always polite, but his impatience will get the better of him. He’ll be the one at the store giving lip to the manager, yet still saying please and thank you the whole time.

- Loves playing the seniority card. He’s good at what he does, no doubt there, but he still thinks he’s tough shit He gives himself more importance than he should. If someone he likes tells him off, he will drop down so many pegs, it is incredible. Will go quiet and embarrassed if scolded.

- Actually has pretty good taste in fashion. He pays attention. It’s a bit of a preening thing, a bit of a wanting to seem valid thing.

- He will giggle at a sex joke if he wasn’t expecting it (if he’s flirting, it’s a different story).

- He is great at hiding his nerves. Will overcompensate with the cockiness sometimes if he feels out of place, and definitely likes his liquid courage when talking to women.

- He feels like he has to have a pick up line. He has to impress. His track record of relationships (or lack thereof) isn’t something he likes to think about. Whether it’s because he’s hung up on his late wife, or they don’t like him beyond a quick lay, or he finds he can’t connect with them, he isn’t always sure. He’ll do it for work, or if he really, really wants to, but beyond that, he finds himself distracted by other things.

- Whiskey is his go-to drink. What came first—his preference or the code name? No one is sure, but he is definitely dedicated it. He may hate drugs, but he’s quick to drown his sorrows in alcohol.

- He can cook. Maybe he's not a gourmet chef, but everything turns out fairly decent, and he's even got a couple of special recipes that turn out incredible. His homemade chili is immaculate.

- He doesn’t have any close friends. When he was younger he had some, he knows what it’s like to have a friend. But when he goes out, sees just a group of guys who mess around, genuinely like each other, he feels like he’s missing something. It almost makes him uncomfortable at the thought of having such a support group.

- Despite his propensity to come off as a bit of an asshole, he pales in comparison to actual assholes. Does not tolerate them. If someone is harassing or being a general nuisance, he wont hesitate to step in if necessary.

- If it’s not necessary, he is shameless and will absolutely stay for the show. He finds the drama amusing, and if it comes to action, all the better.

- The man knows what he’s doing (most of the time). He’s a good agent. A good fighter. When things sometimes go south, something unexpected happens, part of him lives for the thrill of it, hoping for a time to shine. It keeps him on his feet. He’d rather focus on not dying during those times, then focus on trying to live when things are quiet.

- He likes working with other agents, it makes him feel less alone. But he is a stickler about who he works with. He’d, of course, prefer to be in charge, and he doesn’t like incompetence. Shit happens, but if you’re not good at back-up, Whiskey’s got no use for you.

- He trains and practices a lot. A lot, a lot. You can’t get that good with a whip, a lasso, and guns, without honing his skills. He likes to try out new moves too, but he won’t do it in front of people. He’s broken quite a few things in his own home practicing moves, but in the end, it really pays off.

- He’s fiercely protective of the people he cares about. If he loved someone, he would likely save the one at the cost of the world.

- Holds grudges like no other. Will seek revenge whenever the mood strikes him. And he has a knack for it too. Not always confrontational, but if you wrong him, and he feels its personal? He’ll make sure you’re ruined one way or another.

- He doesn’t always want to take the lead, but if there’s ever a pause, someone hesitates to do something, he automatically thinks ‘fine, I’ll do it myself’.

- He lives to be a showoff. He likes to be the center of attention. Its stems from his feeling of not being good enough, of not being able to do things right in the past. He doesn’t care what sort of attention he gathers, and if someone negatively reacts to his skills (with jealousy, criticism, any of the sort) he still counts it as a win. Afterall, why would someone be paying so much attention to him if he isn’t worth it?

- He’s a risk taker. Has been all his life. Some risks didn’t pay out and left him with insecurities he likes to pretend don’t exist. Some do pay off, and it’s the best high he feels.

- He’s gambled before and would again if the opportunity were to present itself. He’s tried to stop, but he knows he’ll go back. When he was young, he liked the idea of a high roller’s table. With his job and how much he makes, he’s closer to getting to that fantasy. He doesn’t talk about it, but his dream mission is at a casino, playing on the Statesman bill, with a finely dressed woman on his arm.

- Yes. His biggest fantasy is to be an American cowboy James Bond. Sorry. No I’m not.

- When he was young, he was seriously in love. It was that first love, the one you think you could never have again, yet somehow is still only a surface love. It felt deep at the time, but if he were to love again, really love, it would be a true love that he doesn’t even believe exists. It’s the knowing someone as much as you know yourself, the sort of support that is unbelievable yet impossible to live without, and being able to share the fears and doubts of past trauma and uncertain futures and be met with trust and loyalty that could only be found in fiction.

- He’s become a serial flirt to hide that desire for true love. He loved his late wife, but they hadn’t had the time, and they’d still been practically kids. He’s afraid to let any relationship go beyond that.

-He is a man of devotion. Devoted to his work, to his principles, to his wife. Sometimes the way he expresses it is extreme, but no one can deny he cares.

- He likes to have nice things. He’s got a nice apartment, filled with any comforts and random assortments that spark joy. If Marie Kondo went through his stuff, there would be very little he’d agree to let go. Everything seems to have a story behind it.

- “Now that hat? Been with me through too much. Couldn’t wear it til I was eighteen, tried to ride my first horse with that one, and I damn near lost it. See these bullet holes? Mission up North went South, and had I moved any slower, I’d’ve been brought back in a pretty wooden box and dropped six feet under.”

- He may try to support the Statesman brand but…his name is Jack Daniels. You can bet he’s got every brand of whiskey in his own personal collection.

- At his place in new York, he always keeps extra stuff ‘for company’. He very rarely ever gets a chance to use it.

- He loves gadgets, tech, the best vehicles. He tries to make sure he can do it all because it makes him feel like Bond, but he sticks to what he knows best. The whip and the lasso make him unique.

- The man is really kinky. He doesn’t let it out unless he is completely comfortable, but…he really is.

- This man is a mama’s boy. We all know it.

- He wants to have a family. He really does. Part of him refuses to believe he ever will, that he doesn’t deserve it. The other part thinks that it’s the only thing that will fill the hole in his heart.

[queen-scribbles]

ship headcanons: 3 odd for Brykar, 3 even for Spy Nerds, and 3 multiples of four for Telara, please!

Brykar

11. What do they hide from one another?

Bry hides exactly how dangerous some of her missions are. She’s Havoc Squad, so obviously they’re dangerous, but Jonas doesn’t need to know how bad some of them get. Jonas doesn’t tell her about the number of times SIS has spied on various military personnel(and if we’re taking that one fic you wrote as canon--which I am muahaha--it takes him a really long time to admit to writing fanfic :3)

15. When they watch a film what do they choose and why? Who gets the final vote?

Usually the Star Wars equivalent of James Bond bc they both love banter and action. Sometimes a thriller, dramedy or really, really cheesy romance. If they can’t agree, whoever is more recently back from a mission gets final say; they likely need to unwind more

29. Why do they fall a little bit more in love?

Because she snores and he talks in his sleep. Because he can’t cook to save his life but neither can she. Because she’s honest about everything, not just the easy stuff. Because he does the right thing even when it’s “not his job”. Because her singing voice is terrible and his sense of rhythm is worse. Because he can talk down most people looking to start a fight and she can whoop the ones who still do. Because he looks damn good in a tux and she looks too incredible for words in a fancy dress. There’s a thousand reasons and moments, big and small, but they always come back the other one feeling like home. (Even if home stole your favorite jacket or sometimes wears too much cologne)

Spy Nerds

4. Who can’t keep their hands to themselves?

Both, technically, but Jaaide mostly. Especially after Nathema, where he almost died in her arms shortly after she got him back. She was already touchy-feely, but after that, she can’t be within five feet of Theron without beelining to hold his hand or wrap her arm around his waist or something. She wants to touch him, to reassure herself he’s still there.

18. When they fight, how do they make up?

Usually with cuddles. If it’s a really bad fight, there may be a sparring match that inevitably crackles with sexual tension beforehand, and then a shower. Sometimes if Theron said/did something thoughtless he’ll get her a cometduster unprompted and not tease her once about it being her favorite drink. When Jaaide screws up, she’s more likely to apologize via backrubs.

But all things lead to cuddles 99.9999999% of the time

30. Why does it work (or not work) between them?

Because they understand and trust one another. Even if SIS and Imperial Intelligence are different in practice, they’re similar in principle, so they get each other’s thought process and understand the penchant for playing things close to the chest. Also, in the beginning, the relationship required an equal amount of trusting each other, coming form opposite factions like they (supposedly /cough) did. They love one another and are committed to making this work, so aside from the occasional communications fumble(/raised eyebrow at the Disaster Spy), they do their best to make it happen, and thus work through anything that tries to get in the way.

Telara

4. Who can’t keep their hands to themselves?

Tel. Elara is more reserved, especially in public. But Tel’s so excited that this awesome, amazing, inspiring woman loves him he can’t help himself. Also, he’s just a very hands-on person in general, while Elara likes to observe.

16. When the zombie apocalypse comes, how do they cope together?

Tel does most of the supply/food gathering, hopefully doesn’t get hurt by anything other than environmental hazards, and kills zombies, Elara rations out the supplies, patches him up, and will play backup if he’s going somewhere particularly dangerous. The two of them will probably wind up running a colony of survivors bc they can’t stop themselves from helping/protecting people. Tel probably takes crazy risks keeping everyone safe, and Elara lectures him for them while hugging him very very tightly bc he might be a reckless idiot sometimes but he’s her reckless idiot and she’d really hate to lose him.

20. Where do they go on holiday?

Various places. Anywhere with a beach and/or rainforest. Probably sunny, as overcast places remind Elara too much of Dromund Kaas. The harder it is for their superiors to track them down the better. Other than that, they aren’t too picky.

[bollywood-and-phoenix-feather]

incomplete list of gay st episodes

happy pride here’s my contribution

season 1:

city on the edge of forever

domestic!au

spock’s Poorly Concealed Jealousy

the actual physical woman jim is supposed to be boning (to spock, on where they belong): “you? at his side, as if you’ve always been there and always will”

p l e a s e

the naked time

I'm choking just thinking about this ok

spock, inhibitions lost, fucking tackling jim about his feelings

h a n d h o l d i n g

canon dialogue: “when I feel friendship for you, I am ashamed”

shore leave

“push...push hard....d i g  it  I N  T H E R E, MISTER SPO --

thankyouyeomanthat’ssufficient”

truly legendary

flirting in life-threatening situations(TM)

the planet gives them whatever they desire most & spock’s travel time is suspiciously fast

the devil in the dark

oh my god

standard Battle Power Couple bullshit

orders? don’t know her. we disobey orders to save each other like MEN

dramatic cave-ins

spock melds with an alien & jim is very close to losing his shit

as usual

operation: annihilate

okay listen basically any episode where spock gets sick/injured is fuckng...Too Much

McCoy: uh jim.......do you not mayhaps have a ship to run??

jim: do I look like i FUCKING care. my bf’s hurt just Do Something

errand of mercy

this episode is so fucking slow

do you know why?

because they can’t. stop flirting.

please y’all are trying to sneak into a compound can you tone it down and FOCUS for two (2) seconds

this side of paradise

this isn’t even that gay it’s just included on principle

did u kno star trek invented sex pollen?

yup.

spock hangs upside-down from a tree just watch it

season 2:

we getting real gay real fast kids

amok time

this is it. this is The Episode. this is the hallowed ground where it all began

seriously watch this Very First about 800000000 fanfic things will make sense

jim & spock Not Looking at each other and discussing Vulcan mating habits

spock about to challenge all Vulcan traditions bringing jim (and bonus bones) down to Vulcan

spock! smiling!

SPOCK! SMILING! AT! JIM!

spock, in full Vulcan mating throes, wrestling jim to the ground

later “huh my mating drive is gone now. fascinating”

spock, logically: ‘I can’t talk about this based on thousands of years of Vulcan privacy” 

spock, gayly: “yeah ok jim i’ll tell u”

I can’t even list everything this ep is such bullshit just watch it

mirror mirror

‘if I read my Spocks correctly”

spock w a beard, jim w a cutoff tank. true gay fashion icons

sparkly eyeshadow

spock being ordered to kill jim for his own gain and Not Doing It

u just Kno that jim has to keep reminding himself not to flirt w mirror!spock

bread and circuses

this made me and @phoenixexploded SCREAM in my kitchen

flavius and his cutoff shorts? a Gay McFreakin Icon

u kno that post that’s like ‘gay people don’t know how to use chairs’ yeah

this ep is more mcspock than anything

flirting snark in inopportune situations, including but not limited to: during a fight for their lives, in a prison cell, in a prison cell AGAIN

spock saves bones’ life

bones: “why, you wouldn’t know what to do with a genuine, human emotion --” “really, doctor?” “yeah, i’m worried about jim too”

not mentioned above: the FUCKING sex eyebrows. bones keeps flicking his eyes to spock’s lips.

the sexual tension is eNormous. save them

the ultimate computer

when your bf gets jealous of a computer

bones: spock sure loves that computer

jim: yeah I Hate It. No Reason Why Just a Bad Feeling

Actual Canon Dialogue: “Computers make excellent and efficient servants, but I have no wish to serve under them. Captain, the starship also runs on loyalty to one man, and nothing can replace it, or him.”

friday’s child

jim & bones have a fight & when jim apologizes spock basically tells him off Vulcan-style

uh bones adopts a baby it’s fine

bones is holding hands w this warrior lady and when spock walks by he YANKS his hand out of hers like a guilty kid

spock makes an Angst Face and walks away

there is no context for any of this

bones: “you put one hand here to support its head -- “ spock: “I would rather - I would rather not”

the baby gets named “leonard james” and they’re like spock what a great name right? what do you think?

spock: I think the two of you will be insufferable for a week, captain

journey to babel

fucking. iconique

Worst Meet The Parents Ever

Amanda & Jim bond over being in love with Vulcans

Spock & Sarek bond over their illogical humans

jim pretends he’s not Literally Dying of a stab wound so spock can save his dad

the apple

can you maybe Stop Flirting before you’re all dead

handholding bc why not

spock Yeets Himself in front of a poison dart (for jim ofc) and then tries to say it was the logical course of action

bones calls spock the devil pt 1

a piece of the action

“spocko”

spock says jim’s driving alarms him

this episode is terrible. please watch it

the changeling

spock melds with a computer & gets hurt and jim LOSES IT

no platonic touches we cling to each other’s arms instead

catspaw

this ep is complete batshit

bones calls spock the devil pt 2

kinky dungeon adventures

the deadly years

this shit is ANGSTY

they all start aging really fast ig

jim: ‘i’m not pretty anymore’ spock: I love u anyway captain 

spock displaces jim for his own good and jim’s like ‘how could u of all people betray me like this. I thought u LOVED me’

season 3:

and the children shall lead

turbolift makeouts

”my Vulcan friend”

can your bf bring you out of a full-blown, alien-induced panic attack by saying your name one (1) time? no? didn’t think so

need me a freak like THAT

this also made us start shrieking in the kitchen btw. my mom thought we were dying

the tholian web

this is The Angstiest Episode of TOS

they think jim’s dead & can’t stop arguing and it’s Sad

jim leaves them (just Spock and Bones btw) a message to listen to after his death & it’s like ‘trust each other. be strong. love, ur bf’

when they find him he’s like ‘what happened? how’d u get along without me? what did u think of my message”

& they’re like ‘haha what message. nah it was fine.’

jim: yeah sure I call bullshit

whom gods destroy

this megalomaniac captain gets a crush on jim & spock is Not Having It

at various points the bad guy impersonates both of them. both jim and spock can tell that it’s him.

like listen. as a viewer I have the benefit of dramatic timing and background music and I couldn’t even tell

in conclusion, it’s gay, lads. thanks for coming to my tedx talk.

i’ll be back soon with additions esp to season 3. u can’t stop me.