#i hate calling it abusive becaude i really dont feel like i can call it when my friends have literally have been hit and kill threatened for

[esidisimpreg]

Can i get some really honest opinions on how I'm interpreted from when you first met/followed me to how you guys do now?

I'm sorry I ask for so much attention from my mutrals , I just need distractions from everything, and I need to know what i should work on and everything.

[forgetandnotslowdown-17]

My Emotional Abuse Story

We all know that abuse comes in many different forms and that it can damage you so badly that its hard to believe you can ever get better. Physical scars will always remain even after they heal. Emotional scars will do that too. Emotional abuse leaves you being afraid to say anything to anyone because you don't know how they will react. It leaves you feeling crazy because other people don't see the abusive side of this person. I myself am afraid that no one will ever believe me. I never felt like I needed to share my story with anyone but it might help others recognize what they are going through.

I started dating someone my senior year of high school (I graduated 2017 so we are at 2016 on the timeline) and I had never been happier. I had been going through a really rough patch in my life and I was really depressed but he made and still makes me feel so happy to be alive. But my parents didnt like him. In fact, my whole family ended up hating him. For what reason, I don't know. I never got a definitive reason. But I continued to see him and I started spending a lot of time with him. Most of my free time was spent with him. My mom didnt like that so we eventually we're only allowed to see each other on the weekends. I could tell that she was slowly trying to push him out of my life but I ignored it. Around March is where things got really ugly. I ended up getting pregnant and it was one of the hardest things that I've ever had to go through. I knew I had to tell my mom but I was do terrified becaude I had no idea how she was going to react but I suck it up and told her assuming I would get some type of support. But it would seem I assumed wrong.

Instead of finding support, which is what any teenager in this situation would need, I was condemned and basically scarlet lettered as I like to call it aha. It was absolutely crushing. I felt so dejected. And to make it worse she took away my phone and tablet telling me I woulsnt be able to talk to my boyfriend for a while. I couldnt talk to my friends or anyone that could help. I was devastated. When I tried to talk to my mother we always ended up fighting and there were so many things that I didnt realize she was doing until my boyfriend pointed them out.

She always brought up my past failures and used them agaisnt me

She called me names

She told me I was the reason she was getting worked up

And anyone I tried to tell that to told me that she was just punishing me for what I had done.

I was a few minutes late for curfew sometimes. She wanted to control every aspect of my life. I went to school drained, often missing assignments becaude I couldnt focus on my work. My grades dropped but nobody noticed. And finally I reached my breaking point and I ran away at 3 o'clock in the morning. I went to my boyfriend's place and left a note telling everyone I was safe. But then morning came and the police showed up saying I was in their custody and they were taking me home. The officer had been informed that I was being emotionally abused but I found out that it didnt matter. Never mind I was terrified to go back home and I was sobbing in the back of a police car.

When it comes to emotional abuse the police dont care. If there aren't any physical scars or proof of abuse they will send you back home where the situation will only get worse. This is exactly what happened.

I told my mother I was not okay and that I didn't like what she was doing. I told her exactly what she was doing and she blamed that accusation on me. She was reacting this way because of me. And since I wasn't okay, I was sent to therapy. It took a few months for everything to kind of calm down but there was always the abuse.

I graduated, I got a job working at a pet shop and I tried to move on. Eventually I told my mother that once I turned 18 I was moving out. And so now here I am, 18 and living with my best friend.

What I forgot to mention is that my entire family hated my boyfriend. My mother was telling them what she thought and telling them stories from her point kf view just to make him look bad and that was hard. Because of the animosity I was afraid to bring him to any family event and afraid to post about him on social media. I was afraid to show him off a little and I still am. But there were a few members of my family that stayed open and told me that if I needed anyone to talk to they were always available.

So the point of this whole story is that if you are being emotionally or physically abused you have the right to extract yourself from your abuser. It doesnt matter if they are family - they do not own you. You are a person and they do not own you. My abuse story hasnt taken place my entire life - the length of time does devalue what you are going through. And it took me up until today to realize that. I am still coming to terms with this past year but I know that I can only grow from it. You are stronger than you may believe. I am so grateful for the family members that supported me and still support me. There will always be family and friends who will give you their blessings and take care of you and make sure you're feeling well.

I'm sorry for this long, jumbled mess. I'm not too great at telling anyone my story but hopefully someone will find this helpful.

If anyone has any questions, you can ask me anything. If you're looking for domeone to talk to I am glad to talk. 💜💜