#i had to look through a lot of my art to find these and im just here to say why did i think my 2ha art was bad?????????????
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plaest2k · 2 days ago
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hey, im a young nz artist too and i like making comics/want to do something bigger when im older, and i think your stuff is genuinely so fucking cool. i love it so much. i was wondering how you pursued art after highschool, like did you go to art school? if so, where and what was that like, and if not, how’d you find the time to continue doing it? its always felt like my opportunities for a career in art specifically seem smaller living in nz, but idk your stuff inspires me to think otherwise. thank you :)
kia ora!!
thanks so much for asking, it's truly so flattering that a young nz artist would ask me for advice! <3 sadly i might not necessarily be the best person to ask...
First of all, it's been a loooooong time since i've been a young artist hahaha I'm 32. After high school, I studied architecture at university because, as you're probably aware, we don't really have art schools like our peers do overseas. But after studying for a few years, I had a major depressive episode and dropped out. After that, I ran away to Korea to teach english for a year before coming back to work in cafes for about 6 years. Back then I was pursuing a career in editorial illustration cause that's what all my favourite artists were doing but I didn't realise that it was a dying industry at the time and there weren't exactly lot of full-time professional artists here who could have warned me...
So after about 10 years of trying to piece together some kind of profession in illustration, I ended up looking for a tattoo apprenticeship which was looking pretty promising but my bosses turned out to be not-so-great people. I tried to keep tattooing on my own but that was around the time COVID hit which wasn't (and still isn't) great for a job that requires you meet face-to-face with a lot of people. So, since the pandemic began, I've just been subsisting off of jobseeker, chipping away at comics and the occasional illustration gig.
The whole experience had me perpetually burnt out for the past ~15 years and made me realise that art as a career really just shouldn't be a thing. Under capitalism, it requires either an embarrassing level of compromise, privilege or luck to pursue. All the household-name artists you know in NZ either come from privilege or got unbelievably lucky. I don't say this as a value judgment or anything, most of them are truly wonderful people, it's just what I've learned about them as colleagues who've worked together a few times over the years.
I don't fault anyone for wanting to pursue that, but if you want to make uncompromising art that makes you feel fulfilled, you can't stake your livelihood on it. Art is supposed to be a by-product of life well lived, not content to be sold.
It's why I'm making plans to go back to uni next year to switch careers into a cushy office job because, as you've observed, even if you still want to pursue this as a full-time career, opportunities for artists in Aotearoa is extremely limited.
Having said all that, there's still a lot of nuance to this whole thing that would take me too long to cover in a tumblr post, so if you'd like me to elaborate or anything or have more questions, you're more than welcome to contact me through my email: [email protected]!
And this offer extends to literally anyone who might be looking for advice or just wants to talk about art <3
Final thing: the thought of studying something else at college/ university and keeping your art as a hobby might sound bleak when you're young, but life is so much longer than you think. You might feel like you have limitless creativity and ideas at the moment but when it becomes your entire life, you burn through it all faster than you'd think. It's because you need fuel to inform what you make and you can't get that from just making art. Like I always say, art is a by-product of a life well lived; You need life-experiences; You need to love, hate, care, be hated and loved to make art and you can't do that if you're too busy to do any of that. Those 3 years you spend on a bachelors is nothing in comparison to a lifetime of staring at a blank page, agonizing over what to make next.
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hinamie · 4 months ago
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I don't want to regret the way I lived
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danmeichael · 8 months ago
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abtheb · 2 years ago
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April 28, 2023
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Despite everything, it's still you.
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supersecretnerd · 5 months ago
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Ok so these designs are cute as hell, the Internet is just mean
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I have too many thoughts about a game I still need to watch
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#goodbye volcano high#i dont have the money to buy it but god i need to watch a playthrough when i have time it's so interesting to me#like; the theme of 'yeah we're going die but that doesn't mean we can enjoy what time we have left' sounds amazing to me love that#its so funny i was actually watching a review of it that was basically 'this game sucks and here's why'#and then it just started listing off shit like- 'the characters designs are pastel they're nonbinary you die no matter what'#and then my neurons just went off and went '👁️👁️ oh! sounds amazing i want to see more'#fuck yeah pastel nonbinary dinosaurs lets go#well i think its just fang thats nonbinary and then two other trans characters#i saw a cutscene! and it was about the experiences of being an apart of a family as sec-gen immigrant and trans-#and i thought that was cool as hell dont recall ever seeing that in any of thr arts ive seen before (but there's lots of art out there!)#heard it got some glitches tho (havent looked in depth of what those glitches are) hopefully it got patched out#also im so fucking pissed i saw the gator game before i saw this 😮‍💨 (context; apparently made by people who made a fangame where they#the mc of this game a datable side character and they only have a happy ending if they detransition? which fucking yikes😬)#i saw people say 'oh but they did it empathetically' like how the fuck is taking a canon nb character and making them only happy through#detransitioning empathetic that sounds super fucking shitty and gross#i think a character that detransitions can be done and would be interesting to see- but this just reeks of people being transphobic for real#oh also purple dino has a slug or worm or something apparently! seems cute! just a lil thing#apparently its a rhythm game; listened to some of the songs and it sounded good! sadly i suck at rhythm games#but apparently failing doesn't affect the story? kinda wish it would but honestly better for me lol-#pink one and fang end up dating i believe- from what i saw pink is like- soft spoken artist? dunno if accurate but she's cute#all the characters are cute just look at them!!! awesome#also they have to just continue school like normal before they die and honestly thats so real#also saw people dislike the fact you dont see the characters actual die or the meteor#which is ??? dunno i just think some things are better left implied than shown-#anyways man i keep trying to find neat stuff about the game and all i see is people bitchin about it or praising the shit fan on instead 😔#man if i had two nickles for a time i grew to become obsessed with a media only for loads of people to hate id have two nickles#first nickle is kat elliot she's such a cool character Internet wasn't ready for her#also yes i saw obsessed i can just tell this is something ill go bonkers for#i mean god look how much text is in my tags for this already! and i still need to see the game in it's fullness!#im sure there's other cool shit
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drpeppertummy · 2 years ago
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when ur trying to play m*necr*ft on a full belly
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[ID: a drawing of a pink and green anthro plush shark with long purple hair. they're sitting on the floor with a laptop on their lap, and their very round belly is bulging out onto the laptop, covering part of the bottom.]
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patheticlizard · 10 months ago
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i realize now i havent actually posted any art (on this page anyway) in almost a full year. i didnt really draw much in 2023 but i still had a handful of finished works that i was just not in the right mindset to post. i will try to get around to that! will have to remember to set up a queue. definitely need to remember all my tags...
im trying to get into a better mindset about drawing at all. the past 3 years have done nothing but make art become increasingly more and more negative to me, and anytime i tried to draw i just got mad at myself to the verge of tears because im just. not as good as i used to be in my opinion. but thats not very fair to myself and im trying to get better about that! ive been drawing again recently and having fun doing so because i lowered expectations of myself and honestly. its really nice to just fuck around and draw silly little guys again.
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u3pxx · 3 months ago
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safe for work... but not from love? 😳🦺⚠️
my piece for the @klapollo-minibang for the wonderful @soulplumber1337's fic! go read it neow!!! my fellow artist @ange1ux also made some excellent art for it that you should also check out!! 💥✨
like what i do? support me on ko-fi! 💜♥️
i forgot how to make posts what do i babble about again FDGHD ANYWHO had the unlucky time of me experiencing art block as i was finishing this BUT THAT'S OKAY!!! BC I DID IT!!! AND I THINK IT LOOKS PRETTY DARN OKAY! and i know klapolly are supposed to be the stars here but i can't help but find daryan in the bg so funny LOL
i also remembered how to render as i was coloring this, whenever i go through long periods without drawing i usually forget how, oops! but i reallyyyy enjoy the subtle color changing and the rim lighting for this one, sososos tasty
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anyways! i know the previous minibangs i usually drew some mock posters (i can't help it, they're very fun pftt). but, unexpectedly, i leaned more into making this look like some manga cover; bc as i was drawing it, it just started to have the vibe of one imo pftt so i decided to take a lot more inspiration from romance covers! (idk if in the end, was the inspiration obvious? my brain is fried rn i cant tell if it is GDHJD)
once again, go read the fic here!!!!!!! it's a very delightful read and i'm sure you'll enjoy it!!!! oshapollo my beloved!!!!!!!!! this pitch had me hooked when we had to choose and it's been fun to draw for it! i also can't wait for yall to see my artist partner's work bc MAN!!!! IT'S AWESOME!! so so honored to work with my MB partners! yahoo!!!!!
ok im running out of things to say sayonara 🫡 stay safe
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complete-clownery · 11 months ago
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Hahaha okay rant about this amazing fanfic (you probably heard of this one already but still)
So whenever it comes to explaining and writing under my posts I just get lazy but I need to push through this cuz I need to talk
So the fanarts were made for the lmk fanfiction sunbreak, that a lot of you (probably mostly shadowpeach shippers) had read, and it is amazing, I read trough it as fast as my brain let me and as you can see it has pleasantly scratched my brain so much so that I even (attempted) to make fanart for it
Ngl if I wasn't a major pussy I would try to illustrate the whole thing or make covers for each chapter but Im unable to work on something more than 2 hours and I would want those to look good, but good looking art (if I don't mess up) takes 6 hours ughh--- annoying much---
Anyways I'm not good with literature but man is this fix a masterpiece *chefs kiss* its everything its amazing, I was unable to put it down once I started it
Okay i dont think I have the brain capacity to explain how much I worship the writer of this masterpiece @ladygreenfrisbee , so i'm just going to talk about the drawings a tad
So first picture with Red Son and MK its sort of like an au in the fic where the whole lbd plot is somehow nonexistent and after Macaque gets to his sisters domain they settle down and raise the kids together without much of an issue aside from assassinations keep happening and trying not to get in trouble with the heavens
Id like to think that Gongzhu still wouldn't let the court tailors to put any form of red or gold on MKs outfits and only allowed the yellow after when MK was old enough to declare that yellow was his favorite color, but even now she would insist on some form of purple and shadow motives to let others know who the mother is
We also got baby MK and toddler Red Son and sassy LIF and Mac
Third pic with the lion: I don't know what it was or why but I just love general Song so much--- he's a major dickhead but sgvshshsevkdididhr (actually I kinda love all the original characters in this one, from the generals to the old lady in the beginning of the book, (gosh I also wanna draw some scenes from those chapters I loved how Mac and she interacted hshsjsj))
so chapter 34 was probably my favorite so far I re read it about two more times cuz it was amazing to see Macaque being the schemer he is and try to piss of Song lol
Last picture: its a sketch/a wip or whatever (probably not going to finish it but im still putting it there cuz its somewhat decent looking)
Its the part where Wukong remembered of Macaque finally finding him and asking for him to come back to flower fruit mountain.
I tried to make Macaque look more unhinged on this one but since I didn't finish it I dont think its that noticable so fuck that but I also gave him a halo like the saints to symbolise his suffering and what not (thought it looked cool and fitting think whatever you want about it lol)
And that all ((((hollly mother))))
If you read this trough, thank you and congrats👏👏
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astraystayyh · 5 months ago
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Starry night.
in which you and hyune fall in love through paintings.
idol!hyunjin x museum guide!reader. love at first sight, kinda. both mc and hyune are romantics.. lots of art analysis and conversations. very fluffy and soft. like so soft i hurt myself with this you guys.
all the info about Vincent Van Gogh’s life and works are from the Van Gogh Museum. the interpretations are my own but im not an art critic, obvi, just a yearner 💔 please enjoy, feedback is highly appreciated 💞
thank you to the lovely reader who commissioned me!!!! the money went to our stayblr fundraiser for palestine. please consider donating if you are able too as well <3333
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“You’ll be able to do it, right?” Your manager Martin looks at you expectantly, and you blink slowly in response. It, referring to leading a private tour of the Van Gogh exhibition.
You’ve been a museum guide in New York for four months now. When you’re not painting, you’re here, amidst the array of artworks nestled in a quaint street near East River. You’ve led group tours before, always under the watchful eye of Martin, a middle-aged man who never forgets to bring you a vanilla bourbon macaron every morning.
However, you’ve never handled a private tour before. You see the desperation in Martin’s eyes as he awaits your answer—he’s the one who usually handles these tours, but he has urgent family matters to suddenly attend to.
You blink again, your tongue unknotting in a split second. “I’d be happy to,” you beam. The exhibition feels like a second home to you; you’ve visited it countless times long before you started working here.
Martin heaves a sigh of relief, smiling back at you. “I believe in you,” he reassures, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. “Remember why I chose you.”
You grin at his words, nodding vigorously. Your love for art brought you here; your very being seems molded to breathe in paintings and live among them. It’s as sweet a life as it can get.
“You’ll find all the details about our guest in our log. He’s famous, so he’ll be a bit discreet. He’ll expect you to be too,” he explains, hurriedly packing his things. You nod, taking the keys to the art gallery from his hand.
“Don’t worry, the gallery is safe in my hands.”
“I know,” he says with a comforting smile, before finally waving goodbye. You take a deep breath and check the booking for tonight’s exhibition—Hwang Hyunjin.
The name is unfamiliar to you, and so is the face that greets you at 8 p.m. sharp—at least, what you can see of it. He’s wearing a navy cap and a face mask, with a varsity jacket sitting perfectly atop his broad shoulders. He looks young, roughly your age.
“Hi, welcome to our Van Gogh exhibition,” you greet him with a grin. He bows slightly in response.
“No one’s here, so you can remove your mask if you wish. I can take your bag as well,” you offer with a smile. He nods and hands you his black duffel bag, which you quickly pass to the security guard, who places it inside a safe cabinet.
Hyunjin removes his Versace cap, running a hand through his silky black hair. There is an aura of assurance around him, as if he’s poised before a camera in a professional photoshoot. But then, a shy smile appears on his face as he finally removes his face mask, his eyes glinting beneath the golden lighting.
You feel your breath catch in your throat; for a split second, the world around you seems to still, the paintings dimming before the beautiful face in front of you.
“Right,” you clear your throat, “shall we?”
Hyunjin nods, falling easily into step with you. You pause before the first painting, ‘Woman with a Child on her Lap’, 1883.
“This is rumored to be about Sien Hoornik, who became both Vincent’s lover and model. She was a former prostitute, pregnant at the time, and had a five-year-old daughter. Vincent was determined to help her through her hardships, and they dated for a year and a half. But then, he broke it off because he said she was too far gone to be saved.”
Hyunjin nods, his eyes fixated on the painting, his head tilted slightly to the side. “The eyes are telling,” he speaks for the first time, and his voice floods your being like dewdrops reviving flowers at dawn. It is smooth and soft, the end of his words getting lost in the air and caught by your heart.
“The way the mother and daughter look at each other, I mean.” He clarifies, stealing a fleeting glance at you. “There is disdain on the mother’s face, but more toward herself, I think. Maybe because she sees her reflection in her daughter.”
Groups usually scurry past this painting, eager to see Vincent’s more renowned works. You feel your heart soften at how much he seems to be thinking about it, lost in his own world. You’re not even sure he remembers you’re there.
“Vincent was really determined to help her, although his brother Theo disapproved. His parents did too.”
“Isn’t that what love is? To hold someone’s hand even if everyone tells you to let go,” he mutters quietly, his eyes still lost in the painting. A hue of vulnerability colors his words before he clears his throat, as if unwittingly revealing his inner thoughts.
“That’s a beautiful way to view it,” you smile, and he nods, shyly biting his lower lip. For some odd reason, his timidity stirs something unfamiliarly tender within your heart.
You walk over to the next set of paintings. “When Vincent moved to Paris, you can see how his style developed. He let go of the darker tones he used in his infamous ‘The Potato Eaters’ and began using lighter colors, like here,” you explain, pointing to ‘The Hill of Montmartre with Stone Quarry’.
“Do you think it’s because he was happier?” he suddenly asks, and you frown slightly. “Pardon?”
“The shift to lighter colors. ‘The Potato Eaters’ is so sorrowful and shrouded in darkness. ‘The Hill’ is much more colorful, lighter, you know?” His eyes glide to yours, a twinkle of curiosity glimmering in them.
“Vincent did flourish in Paris. For once, he was in the same city as his brother Theo, whom he loved dearly. But he was mainly influenced by modern art, which uses much lighter colors than his previous works. Art critics usually attribute this change in the influence of his contemporaries, such as—”
“But what do you think?” he interrupts softly, leaning against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes are penetrating, and you find yourself lost in the seas of emotion they contain.
You quiet down, licking your lips tentatively. No one has ever asked for your opinion on these tours before.
“Well,” you begin slowly, “I think it’s possible. Being around his brother and other artists who embraced brighter palettes could have uplifted his spirit. But also, maybe the light colors were his way of reaching for happiness, even if he didn’t always feel it. Art often mirrors our hopes as much as our realities.”
Hyunjin listens intently, a thoughtful look on his face. “I agree,” he finally says, smiling sincerely. You don’t know why the sight of his grin renders your brain putty, like melted ice cream under the kind sunrays.
“His use of lighter colors continued when he moved to the south of France. He was delighted with the bright colors in Arles, painting orchards in blossom and workers gathering the harvest,” you explain, pointing to the respective paintings.
“That’s when he told his brother that he wanted to open a studio for fellow painters. He wrote in a letter the following: 'you always lose when you’re isolated.' He sent out many invitations, but only one painter agreed to come.”
“Paul Gauguin,” Hyunjin swiftly replies.
“Exactly. He was the first and last painter to move in with Vincent.”
“It seemed like the more he tried to escape loneliness, the more it found him,” Hyunjin muses, his eyes fixed on ‘Portrait of Gauguin’ by Vincent. The bright colors he asked you about earlier make you wonder if, beneath the spotlight, Hyunjin too feels lonely.
“Sometimes loneliness becomes a friend. You have to make room for it to allow other things to come in,” you say softly.
“It’s sad how nothing good came out of that roommate situation, though” he frowns, and you nod in agreement.
“Paul and Vincent were very different. They had a lot of eclectic views that often led to disagreements. I assume you know their most prominent one.”
“Yes, when Vincent cut off his ear.”
“Correct, he then wrapped it in newspaper and presented it to a prostitute in the nearby red-light district.”
“A prostitute…” Hyunjin muses, his thumb swiping slightly across his lower lip. “It seems like phantoms of his first love found him again. Even in his most disoriented state, he somehow remembered her.”
“You speak of love beautifully,” you suddenly say, before biting your tongue harshly, instantly regretting your words. But Hyunjin’s eyes seem to soften as he gazes at you, the warm light dancing across his pupils.
“It is a beautiful feeling.”
“Only to those who have beautiful souls,” you speak earnestly, and your words seem to morph into brushstrokes, painting the gallery in hues of red. Intimate, soft, too intimate all of the sudden.
“Vincent’s mental health rapidly declined, and he put himself back into the mental asylum,” you quickly clear your throat, though you can still feel Hyunjin’s eyes on you, not the painting. “Still, that’s when he created some of his most famous artworks, like ‘The Starry Night’. He was inspired by the view from the asylum’s window. It’s dominated by vivid yellow and blue, and the colors and paint seem to describe a world outside the artwork itself.”
“It’s breathtaking,” Hyunjin marvels, lost in the painting, leaning in until his nose almost brushes the canvas.
You suppress a giggle, but your laughter fades as you take in the mole right by his jaw, then the one by his neck. The delicateness of his face, the plumpness of his lips, and the curve of his lashes.
He’s beautiful. The painting could seep him in and he’d fit right in with the silver stars. Outshining them too, surely.
“I really liked the tour,” he smiles, nearly two hours of lazy strolls later. “Thank you.”
“Of course,” you grin back, grabbing his outstretched hand. His fingers wrap around yours slowly, deliberately, as if on a mission to ignite your nerve endings. To set your soul ablaze with his palm alone.
His hand holds yours for a few seconds longer than necessary. Your blush mirrors his when he finally lets go.
He quickly bows again, grabbing his bag from his manager, who was waiting by the door. He almost bumps into the handle on his way out, and you let out an endeared chuckle, your eyes lingering on his figure until he disappears into his black van.
You think you'll never see him again, two lines crossing serendipitously at one point, never to cross paths once more. The thought sends a pang of sorrow latching onto your heart, before you quickly brush it away.
But then you do see him again, the very following night, at that.
It is near nine p.m. when Martin exclaims suddenly, “Mr. Hwang!” and you freeze in your place, book guide in hand.
It has been exactly twenty-four hours since you last saw Hyunjin, but when his voice softly echoes through the art gallery, it feels like a lifelong ache finally soothed.
“Please, call me Hyunjin,” he says, shaking Martin’s hand, though his eyes quickly find yours. They stay on you, unmoving yet tender, like a cotton blanket draped over your being.
“How was the tour with Miss Yn?”
“Ah—“ his gaze finally drifts away from yours. “Yes, it was really nice. That's why I came again,” he explains, a touch sheepishly, and your quizzical eyes meet Martin’s.
“Hyunjin booked another private tour. He specifically requested you to be his guide,” Martin explains, and your eyes widen in shock. You don’t have time to reply because your manager quickly scurries away. “I’ll leave you two then. Have fun!”
You wait until Martin disappears into his office before turning to Hyunjin, who avoids your gaze, one hand deep in his pocket, moving side to side. You remain silent for a few moments, simply admiring the side of his face. You’ve always had a deep appreciation for art running through your veins, after all.
“Hi,” he finally says, his eyes quickly meeting yours. You can’t stop the smile that floods your face, coating every nook and cranny of your features.
“You came back,” you say with a breathy giggle.
“Mm,” he instantly grins. “I don’t know when I’ll be back in New York, so I wanted to truly memorize the art here.”
“When are you going home?” you ask as you take his bag again, your eyes taking in his outfit—a green cap this time, a knit vest over a white shirt, and a silver teddy bear necklace nestled perfectly against it. Pretty.
“Tomorrow. We had a tour stop here, and we’ll go back to Seoul now.”
“And you’ll be spending your final night in the city here?” you chuckle slightly, and he shrugs as if it’s the most obvious decision he ever had to make.
“Why not? I think it’s beautiful here.” though his eyes never move to look onto the paintings, gliding across your face instead.
“And I forgot to take pictures yesterday,” he quickly adds, pointing to the camera in his hands.
“I’ll help you then,” you offer, and he smiles so brightly that it renders you speechless, suddenly wondering if the first person who ever drew a portrait had a similar thought—that they saw a smile so beautiful they just needed to immortalize it.
Hyunjin is at ease before the camera. You can tell by the way he almost pretends the device isn’t there, his eyes fixed on the paintings, mere centimeters away from the canvas. He’s whisked away into another world. You see your love for art mirrored in his soul as well.
“Do you paint, by any chance?” you ask between pictures, and he nods.
“Whenever I have free time. And you?”
“I do. I can show you later, if you’d like.”
“I’ll hold you to that,” he says, pointing his finger at you, before looking directly into the camera this time. “I’ve been painting magnolias lately.”
“Really? Why magnolias specifically?”
“I read a poem about them. It said that when magnolias wither, they aren’t considered beautiful anymore. But that doesn’t mean they weren’t at one point. It really moved me.”
“You have to be very optimistic to view it that way,” you say as you finally hand him the camera, satisfied with your pictures. You are both standing in front of ‘Almond Blossom,’ the pastel colors drawing you in.
“Withering flowers mean that at one point they were in full bloom. Grief means that at one point you did love,” you muse. “It takes a lot of gentleness to find beauty in endings, to celebrate them as proof of what once was. Don’t you think so?”
You turn to look at him when the flash of a camera catches you off guard.
Hyunjin looks at your picture, a soft smile on his face. “You fit right in with the flowers,” he compliments, though it does not feel superfluous or bearing a hidden intent. It’s a simple observation he wished to share.
“Thank you,” you say quietly, a blush sprouting from your very veins. You quickly fix your posture, pointing to the painting. “I told you yesterday that Vincent painted this for his brother Theo, to celebrate his newborn, whom he named after Vincent.”
“Yes, I remember,” he nods, slinging the camera over his neck and taking a picture of the painting up close. “It seemed to bring Vincent a lot of solace in his final days.”
“I’ve been thinking about your question, whether Vincent was happy. I think he was hopeful more than anything. He had hoped his works would be recognized, he had hoped he wouldn’t be as lonely anymore. Sometimes hope keeps you going much more than happiness.”
“Because happiness will eventually wear off?”
“Right, it’s only natural. But hope… it’s like a flame that never goes out. It might flicker and dim, but it will still be there on your darkest nights.” You bite your lip slightly, your thumb digging into your palm.
“I hope you’ll always have hope in your life, Hyunjin. You’ve been my favorite person to talk about Vincent with,” you say sincerely, your eyes unwavering from his.
You imprint the way his gaze softens into your mind, the slight blush that powders his cheeks, the way his teeth peek behind his smile. You memorize his velvety voice in your mind, the way he accentuates certain letters and how it pulls at the strings of your heart when he says—“I’m very happy I met you, Yn.”
May is gone, and with it Hyunjin, and you think you are a fool for thinking of him as often as you do after only five hours in his presence. You don’t know why your mind is permeated with his essence. But why wouldn’t it be? is the better question. When he’s beautiful, truly, body and soul.
You feel slightly less foolish when a postcard is delivered to your exhibition on a sunny Saturday, one month later. It depicts the front entrance of the Museum of Modern Art in Seoul.
June 13.
“yn,
i saw Vincent’s works once again in this month’s exhibition. somehow they seem less beautiful without our conversations.
i hope you’re surrounded by art, too.
hyunjin.”
June 23.
“hyunjin,
i visited claude monet’s immersive exhibition, you have to visit it as well, once you’re back in new york.
i am still surrounded by art, as always. i don’t think i could ever part from it.
did you finish your magnolias? i hope you’re seeing beauty in them even after they wither.
yn.”
July 5.
“yn,
claude’s works are so different from vincent’s... don’t you think it's beautiful that they lived at the same time yet depicted their world so differently?
my magnolias are finished. i’ve been drawing scenes from your exhibition lately, the picture i took of you is particularly inspiring. i hope you don’t mind.
hyunjin.”
september 26.
“hyunjin,
leaves are falling all over new york. new beginnings are upon us. i hope this view of my window inspires you too.
i wish you happiness no matter the season.
yn.”
october 7.
“yn,
i just saw the first snow at dawn, it was such a pretty view! i’m happy i’m alive today.
i hope snow reaches you fast enough, too.
stay warm.
with love,
hyunjin.”
october 23.
“hyunjin,
i’ve always preferred spring, but snow brought me such a happy opportunity. i’m invited to an exhibition in seoul, next month!
i’ll enjoy it well and think of our conversations.
with love,
yn.”
october 5.
“yn,
the weather is beautiful in seoul lately. i’m happy you’ll be here to see it.
it is late at night, and the moon is shining brightly. i hope it’ll shine as brightly for you too, in new york.
with love,
yours.”
The click of your black heels against the marble floors echoes through the museum, a comforting sound as you stroll through the immersive Vincent exhibition; now gracing Seoul. The colors wash over you, reflecting off your skin, swirling around you until you feel as though you’re being drawn into the very heart of the paintings.
“Enjoying the art, Yn?” a voice like honey drips across your being. Your heart skips a beat, plummets to your knees and races back to its place once again. You feel an ache inside you unfold. memories of Hyunjin’s voice rewriting themselves, perfecting your recollection of his accent and the tender way in which he spoke your name.
“It’s beautiful,” you murmur, though you refuse to turn around and meet his eyes. Not yet. The scent of his rose perfume is enough to have your heart rattling against your ribcage— a bird wishing to escape its cage and deliver your love letter to its rightful owner.
“Isn’t it an amazing coincidence we met here? In Seoul, no less,” he says, his voice airy as he inches closer.
“I know you’re the one who invited me,” you giggle, finally turning to meet his gaze. His eyes widen slightly before morphing into crescents, as if lifted from Vincent’s Starry Night.
“How did you know? I thought I kept it a secret in our postcards,” he grins sheepishly.
“I kept pestering Mr. Martin about why the museum invited me specifically until he finally told me you were behind it.”
“Well,” he licks his lips, his eyes roaming over your face. “I admit, I missed you. I wanted to see you again. And I happen to be a major contributor to the museum.”
“Fancy,” you beam, before your grin morphs to something much softer, as you realize that you are away from your work, and that the Hyunjin of your postcards is finally before you.
“I missed you too. Show me around?”
“Am I your guide now?”
“Mm. I expect you to be an expert.”
“Oh, I am.”
Hyunjin speaks of the paintings as if it’s his first time seeing them, finding new things to admire, new details to point out to you. You find it hard to keep up, only because your eyes seem more interested in observing him. You’ll tell him later that you were right in thinking he’d make every painting more mesmerizing.
But for now, you stroll together, his hand brushing against yours every now and then. Before long, you’re far from the museum, walking into the chilly Seoul night, his jacket draped over your shoulders.
And you talk, you talk about every painting you’ve seen since his departure, the flowers you’ve picked, and the strawberry field you visited at the end of June. He shares stories of his favorite painters and his beloved dog, Kkami, whom he misses dearly. He speaks of the moon and how your postcards lessened his loneliness. You tell him you’ve kept every card by your bedside, the first and last thing you see each day.
Suddenly your pinky is entwined with his, your cheeks ache from how much you’ve spoken and laughed, your heart lighter than it had ever been.
“Thank you for walking me to my hotel,” you smile softly.
He nods, his thumb swiping across your palm tenderly. It’s only after a while that he speaks again. “I know you said that happiness wears off eventually. But right now, the happiness i feel… I think it will last me for the next four months, at least.”
“Just four months?” you tease, and he giggles, tipping his head back. You wish you had your paintbrushes, your camera, a simple pen, anything to commit his laugh into something tangible.
“For a long time,” he finally says, quietly, resigned. Tomorrow’s flight ticket makes your heart ache, all of the sudden.
“I… I’ll get going. Thank you for inviting me,” you smile, dropping his hand. You know it’ll hurt the more you hold it, the easier it’d be for you to remember the softness of his hand.
So you walk back, you’re near the hotel door, a hand suddenly wraps around your wrist, the security guards both discreetly look away.
“Yn,” Hyunjin turns you around, his eyes are as wide as the full moon hanging close to earth, listening in to your conversation.
“You didn’t- you didn’t show me your paintings.” he says a bit too quickly, desperately.
“What?” you ask, confused.
“Back in New York, you promised to show me your paintings. You didn’t.”
“You remember?”
Hyunjin's chest heaves in response, his warm palms cradle your cheeks, his eyes speak of a yearning you haven’t thought existed. When his lips crash upon yours, fervently, passionately, like the collision of all stars in Starry Night, you have your answer.
He remembered. He remembered as much as you.
Epilogue— seven months later.
“Now… next question,” Hyunjin grins as he takes out a folded paper from a glass jar, five sets of camera’s all pointed at him in the shooting set of Elle Korea.
“If you could feel only one emotion for the rest of your life, what would you choose?”
Hyunjin puts the paper down, adjusts the sleeves of his Versace blue silk shirt. He doesn’t need to think too much to answer— he already has his reply.
“Someone told me, a long time ago, that hope keeps you going longer than happiness. Because happiness wears off eventually. But hope doesn’t. hope is like a flickering flame, it surges and it dims, but it doesn’t go out, so I choose hope.” he smiles suddenly, eyes looking into those of the staff behind the camera.
“That got deep all of the sudden, right? Done worry, Stay, I have hope, happiness and love, all at once.”
He chuckles quietly, picking up the last piece of paper.
“Finally… who’s your favorite painter? Ah, easy, it’s Vincent Van Gogh.”
“What's your favorite painting by him?” the shooting director asks behind the camera, his eyes fixate on the lens. He knows his love will be watching.
“A woman with a child on her lap. It’s not very known, but… if you look into it closely, beautiful things might come into your life and change it forever.”
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from left to right, Woman with a Child on her Lap, 1883 — Portrait of Gauguin, 1888— The Potato Eaters, 1885—The Hill of Montmartre with Stone Quarry, 1886— Almond Blossom, 1890— The Starry Night, 1889.
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soularsss · 4 months ago
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Drawing Likeness: with Tem!
okaay since a few people actually showed interest in me sharing a bit of what I've been doing to figure out how to really capture likeness, specifically Temuera Morrison, I figured id do my best to write it out
I am also going to entice you with some of my recent clone art! (oooh some of it is unreleaaasedd)
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I am putting the whole thing under the cut because I have a feeling its going to be long:
Read more!!!
a couple disclaimers before we start
-This is not some definite post about how everyone should be drawing clones, nor is it in any way claiming that this is the right way. This is just my musings as I stare at a mans face for way too long and try to replicate it
-I am inexperienced. As kind as you all are to me, drawing real people is relatively new to me, capturing a persons identity through their features is difficult for anybody, and I am no different. I have watched many a video on likeness and had my share of classes, but If im being honest, i rarely put it into practice successfully. So there'll probably be errors in this post or things i will come back to in a few months and wish I had said/done differently
ANYWAYs you guys get my vibe im just here to ramble and today we are rambling about mr copy paste. I am doing this for Law, my clone boy, because I plan on delving further into oc fanart and I want to put effort into representing him correctly!
SO LETS BEGIN
Before even deciding what specific pose of a person I want to draw, I tend to grab a bunch of references and compile them like so
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(all of these can be found on my pinterest)
Why so many? Well, we are about to delve into facial features, so when we are dealing with photos we have to take into account that there are an abundance of circumstances that will influence how a persons face will appear, some of these include:
focal length: All of these are taken on different devices, and focal length can play a big part in distorting faces
age will play a part, your face changes a bunch throughout your life!
lighting, while not as major, can muddy the waters and make it difficult to interpret facial planes and features
SO, to make sure we get a proper grasp of what's really going on, I like to make sure we have lots of options to compare and contrast with.
Next up! What I like to do is block out the main facial features with colour on different layers, the features I block out usually are the general face shape, eyebrows, eyes, nose and lips. But what you are looking for is the defining features of a person, so that could include other things! Maybe a scar, or some particularly prominent cheekbones.
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I dont have any rhyme or reason when it comes to picking my colours, all that matters is you can see all the shapes clearly.
Now I may be biased, because Ive been staring at these for 4 hours, but notice how it still looks like Tem? :D
Anyways, now we can break these parts down, and you'll see what I mean about compare and contrast:
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We'll start with isolating the facial shape, putting all these next to eachother you'll notice they arent exactly the same (partly because of my shoddy work) But the distinguishing features run through each shape! Namely the very soft rectangular shape I sketched out in the bottom right there. Along with his soft, wide jaw structure.
I did the same for the rest of his features!
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You'll notice I highlight the prominent shapes and ratios,
When drawing anything, it is important to start from the very base shapes and build up.
When drawing something you want to look like someone, those shapes relative to other shapes is what makes it look like them.
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I didnt use the same technique with his eyes and lips, but I wrote out some helpful info for them! More importantly for his eyes.
When drawing eyes, I find the most important part is where exactly I draw the creases, (along with the overall shape of the eye itself) it is important to understand where those will present themselves with hooded eyes.
NOW, with an understanding of his facial features in place, lets take a detour to colours:
before I start, a couple things to note:
-Temuera morrison versus the clone troopers in the animated shows:
While I love the animated shows they don't exactly stay close to their source material. Im going to link here to an excellent post discussing whitewashing specifically in relation to the clones.
Temuera is Māori, of Te Arawa (Ngāti Whakaue) and Tainui (Ngāti Maniapoto, Ngāti Rarua) whakapapa, and also has Scottish and Irish ancestry.
The Māori people are the indigenous Polynesian people of mainland New Zealand (Aotearoa). Māori originated with settlers from East Polynesia. Māori people often vary in skin tone, Skin colour doesn't determine ethnicity. There's often a correlation but it's not a requirement.
But that is a tangent! What we are aiming for is to stay true to Temuera.
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Bringing back my reference photos from before, Ive colour picked a buncha values and theyre all over the place. Why doesnt this work?
Similarly to earlier, you have to take into account the photos themselves. Many things like lighting, colour grading (when it comes to filmography) and makeup, can alter how a skin colour presents in photo.
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You can attempt to get true to life by swatching from certain places on the face. Here I've tried to pick some photos with good lighting, and I've also tried to avoid overly lit/shaded areas.
Tem has a very warm, tan skin tone, Instead of colour picking I tend to try and replicate it myself, but I do often bring in references to make sure Im staying true to the source!
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a brief intermission to talk about colour theory, something I myself struggle with alot. Often, when putting in flat colours without a background, I will forget to make sure the colours i intend to use will work with the skin tone i have picked! (something that is apparent in older works of mine, not just in relation to clones, but in general, the colours I end up with stray largely from their original sources and it is something I am doing my best to keep in mind and improve in! Although I don't think i am nearly experienced enough in the topic to say I have succeeded yet lol.)
anyways back to Tem :))
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Now we can put all of that into practice! Things to keep in mind when drawing out a piece next to a reference like this:
the distance between the eyebrows? how far down his face does his nose go? Basically just, in relation to eachother, where do all those shapes we found earlier, sit?
The screenshot above is from before I did it myself, but instead of directly tracing from the reference, a handy trick I use it to complete your sketch first, and then overlay a traced version to see where your inconsistencies are! Alternatively, you could move your sketch over the image, but I didnt do it that way so!! uh!! im sure it works exactly the same!!!!
When it comes to a final illustration, or any sketch that isnt a direct study, of course you can push and pull and stylise! You'll see below that I'm not exactly 1:1 to my reference photo either.
The important thing with stylisation, or at least my own personal understanding of stylisation is that you need to thoroughly understand the thing you are stylizing! "You need to know the rules to break them" and all that. While shapes, lines and rendering can change, when it comes to drawing someone, and making it look like them, you have to make sure to keep their core features true to source. Caricature can capture a persons vibe whilst drastically exaggerating features, but it will only look like them if you KEEP THOSE FEATURES!!!! SHAPES!!! AHHH!!
But that is just my perspective on the discussion of style versus realism, please dont take is as Law, I dont know what Im on about half the time!!
anyways, after fixing your sketch, add local colours!
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I rexified him because why tf not! But this is where you can go crazy with that clone personalization!
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And then here is a very very barely rendered version (if you guys want me to explain how i RENDER that would need to be a completely different post, and I havent had anyone ask about it yet so who knows! maybe one day) But I digress, hopefully you learnt something new through my ramblings! It has certainly helped me organize my thoughts and I have also found some areas I would like to focus more on in the future to improve my own art!
TLDR: In order to understand an object, be it a face or a building or literally anything, you have to break it down to its simplest forms, understanding LARGER shapes will help you immensely in the long run
If you guys like this sorta content do let me know! I'd be down to do similar things for armor/anything really, I am very anti gatekeep so really anything at all you want to know! Send me an ask :))
also if you see a spelling mistake.. i don’t know how that got there
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hinamie · 2 months ago
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spiraling
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro megumi#gojo satoru#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#the minute i realized how tg coded the composition n colours were i decided to turn it up to 11#i was racking my brain trying 2 figure out how to get the layered tissue paper look tht i talked abt ishida's cover art having#cycled through all my usual layer modes n nothing ws Quite right#until wouldnt u know it . divide n subtract!!!!! i NEVER use divide or subtract bc theyre impossible#but fr this??? its like they were made for it oh my god#it makes the greys look translucent n all my textures pop in a way that makes them appear splotchy n Bruised#which ws the whole point thts the Look god i am so PLEASED#when the layer modes tht notoriously get No love finally find their niche <33 peace and love <333#filing this away fr later i am going 2 have a lot of fun with this new information i think#im very happy w how the colours look n i dont think anything else wld have kept the right Mood#but i am always so >:/ when i have to use a palette tht forces me into giving megumi blue eyes#had to set aside th green eyed megu agenda fr the Aesthetic unfortunately#anyway i knew from the minute i saw it that i wanted to do smth involving the opening panel of 268#bc that panel is S tier#i figured tht if nothing came 2 me i wld just redraw it as-is bc it's alr so good but as i ws sketching i was like#u know what u havent done in a while? art tht looks like u r going Insane#art tht makes ur family ask whether everything is ok#so i once again tucked megumi's knees up 2 his chest and apologized insincerely to him fr making the third megumi angst piece in a row#:)
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seuonji · 1 year ago
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彡 things they left with you before leaving for tour.
notes ๑ gift giving! headcanons. reader and svt member does not live together!
genre ๑ fluff
warnings ๑ none
word count ๑ 1k
from aya: please reblog if you enjoyed! feedback is always appreciated<3
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seungcheol left you the key to his home.
you’re free to go there whenever you want but he mainly gave it so that you have access to his closet!! it’s also to allow you to see kkuma.
whenever you’re there you always send him a selfie to show how the house is doing. he especially loves the photos that contains you and kkuma on his bed.
yn: [photo attachment]
yn: i changed kkuma’s hairpin today, doesn’t she look cute?
cheol: you both look adorable♡
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jeonghan left you tons of his oversized shirts.
tons as in it could probably last you until he comes back. but he leaves the ones that hold some type of meaning.
he’d totally give you a whole presentation while unpacking the clothes on why he’s giving it to you.
he left you the shirt that he wore on your first date. he left you another shirt that you complimented. another one he left was one that you described as, ‘looks very comfortable.’ another was in your favourite colour while another was in your least favourite colour,, he asked you to send him photos of you specifically in that one.
he gave them with the intention that though he’s not there, you won’t feel alone at night.
he loves it when he calls and sees you wearing them!
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joshua left you countless of letters he wrote.
just in case he’s not on his phone enough, to keep his presence with you, he wrote different letters. one for you to read when you’re sad, one for when you felt doubtful, another for when you felt scared.
he wrote letters for any feeling you may feel while he’s gone whether it was sorrow, anger or joy.
one day you were missing him, a lot. so you opened the letter that had ‘read when you feel alone.’ written on it.
‘yn, you’re feeling alone? cause im not there, right( ˊ̱uˋ̱ )?‘ he joked with you even through writing. ‘i know it’s a long wait but i’ll be back soon and we’ll be in bed watching movies together. i’m always thinking about you. i may not be one call away because…what if i’m on stage? but you’re still my number one priority, i hope you know that.’
it’s just long texts of reassurance that he loves you and suggestions of things you can do while you wait for him and honestly, as you read the letters, the more it felt like he was actually there.
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jun left you a polaroid.
he aswell provided the films but the films were the same amount as the number of days he’d be gone.
he asked you take a picture of something everyday whether it was the scenery or something you were doing. you could either label them or keep it in a photo card binder. he wants you to talk about it with him when he comes back.
total plus if you like journaling/photography!!
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soonyoung left you a heart locket necklace.
it had funny pictures of you and him on one side and the other side had a picture of you two cuddling.
he has a matching one of course! his one has so many scratches because of how much he kept opening it.
notably, he left you a cute tiger plush that was almost your size.
“think of him as if he’s me.”
“that’s weird youngie…”
idk why but initially i imagined he’d leave you a body pillow with him printed on it.
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wonwoo left you his console so that you can help him keep up with his games. just kidding.
if you like reading, he definitely leaves you some books he’s collected over the years. he’d even buy books that are of your taste if his isn’t your style. he gave it so that you’d have something to preoccupy your time.
if you aren’t too into reading, he left you things that supports the hobbies you do. if you like art, he buys you paint, if you like knitting he’d buy you yarn. he finds joy in your passion.
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jihoon left you a usb filled with movies and shows on it. he even provided snacks!
he loved hearing your opinions about shows/movies he liked. since you two were going to be apart, he thought you’d have more time to watch them.
when you did watch the said movie/show, he’d instantly call and listen to your opinions intently. he might end up falling for you all over again! but also it could end up in an endless banter—
“what did you think of that character?“ he asked excitedly but there was a touch of tiredness in his voice.
“they were okay,” you casually answered.
“just okay!?” suddenly the tiredness was gone.
“i said what i said!”
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seokmin left you a jar filled with origami hearts, cranes, airplanes, stars and even some of your favourite animals.
as you unfold them, there’s small messages written in them. it had messages of affirmations to song/food/movie recommendations.
he looks forward to your response to the letter you opened that day.
“the one i opened today was a good one,” you said smiling.
“really, what’s wrong with the other ones? why aren’t they as good?” he asked in a whining tone.
“the one i opened yesterday said ‘listen to aju nice by seventeen.’” you recalled monotonously.
“what’s wrong with that?”
“anyways the one i opened today said to ‘eat pizza while thinking about me.’” you brushed off the previous topic.
“ah, that’s a good one, even i’m jealous.”
“you wrote it?”
“still, why would you have pizza without me…”
also, he made tons of it lasted even until he came back.
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mingyu left you a cookbook of things he usually cooks for you.
the first few pages were your favourite meals hes cooked for you. they’re key parts are highlighted in your favourite colours and he even places in affirmations in free spaces. the middle pages are random meals you don’t necessarily like but,, he needed to fill in the pages. the last few pages are your favourite deserts!
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minghao left you the experience of having permanent bracelets with someone.
he brought you to the store and you got a bracelet in his in his favourite colour as he got one with yours. you both spent hours just admiring the way it shined and he couldn’t stop taking pictures of it.
“now, no matter the distance, you’ll still have a piece of me that’s always with you,” he said.
+
seungkwan left you a self care pack.
there was skincare products, your favourite snacks and cds of your favourite films. they were each labelled with tags of why he gave those specific items.
‘you’ve always liked these, enjoy them.’ labelled on the snacks.
‘please use this, take care of your skin okay?’ labelled on the skincare.
‘don’t get too bored just cause im not there.” labelled on the cds
it’s as if he was taking care of you without because there.
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vernon left you a pet fish (?)
questionable but at least you’re not completely alone. also he got consent before he bought it so, it was okay. but he also left you some of his jackets and beanies but if it was summer he’d leave you baseball caps. yknow, the sensible gifts.
it’s the thought that counts!
whenever he gets the time he’d call you to check on the fish.
and you as well, of course.
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chan left you a box full of snacks.
he’s bringing the same snacks with him in his bag. he plans to call you every night so you two can talk about your day while eating the same snacks so that it seems like you two are together.
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rucow · 9 months ago
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some placements im soft for<3
♐ sagittarius sun: my everlasting obsession. the most magnetic people ive ever met. they're insanely beautiful and enigmatic, they fascinate me. i have no sag placements myself, so idk why im so in love with this sign, but to me they're ethereal and regal in a way. they give me a heartthrob. i adore their facial features and their personality, i love their blunt honesty. these people are majestic and special to me. also very silly.
♏ scorpio mercury: this placement could tell me to jump off a bridge and i probably would. their words and tone can have full control over other people, they have so much power in their voice! even if they speak very quietly, the impact of their words is immense. singers and performers with this placement are impeccable at delivering the most raw emotion to their audience. every time they speak, i feel like i can see and feel their soul. which makes sense, because their mercury is conjunct my moon. i feel compelled to listen to these people. they put me under a spell anytime they speak (or sing). also, i love it when they go detective mode trying to solve a ~mystery~
🌠 mercury-neptune conjunctions: ethereal, mesmerising, haunting. i noticed that a lot of singers i listen to have this placement, and you can really feel it. ive always had dreams (and nightmares) about songs written and sung by people with this placement, they're absolutely haunting in such an addictive way. they're out of this world. beautifully poetic people.
♎ libra moon: some of the sweetest people ive ever met. they're so soft and sensitive, even if they don't seem like it. somewhat of a role model to me, i looked up to them so much only to find out im a libra moon myself in sidereal astrology. i have an urge to protect these people and reassure them that their feelings are valid. they have the most beautiful smiles.
♊ gemini moon: maybe it's because my own moon is in the 3rd house, but i find these people very relatable. the amount of hate and misunderstanding ive seen them receive is plain cruel. i think these are some of the most genuine people, and i appreciate it when they speak their mind. silly factor off the charts
♑ capricorn placements (any): i haven't gotten to know you too well yet, but you're always like a breath of fresh air. im intrigued by you! i feel i have so much to learn from you.
♏ scorpio sun: the kindest most understanding people ive ever met. sure, there's been a few bad apples here and there, but so many scorpios ive met have helped me heal, even if indirectly. they've had a huge huge impact on me and im always thankful for that.
♐ sagittarius mars: i adore these people's energy. my mars is in aries but at the 9° degree (a sagittarius degree), and i feel like being around these people is so fun. very very playful people with an outstanding positive energy, they are silliness personified and i love that about them.
♒ aquarius venus: i didn't care much for this placement at first, seeing as it's my own, but looking through works written by aquarius venus artists has hit something deep inside of me. there's something sad about your heart being in this saturnian, fixed sign. it's like a prison. you fully commit to people once you think you've found "the one", and break-ups can be brutal for you. you don't show it on the outside, but your suffering shows in your art, and im sorry i didn't see it sooner. your understanding of the world is very real and fascinating, and you're such a devoted friend. ive grown to understand and appreciate this placement a lot more than i did before.
though i only talk about a few specific placements here, every sign is special in their own way. ily all, take care of yourselves 💖
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aliaology · 8 months ago
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OBSESSED
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SUMMARY: you and jack had been dating for around nine months now, and recently his ex has been coming back around. this causes you to go on a social media stalking rampage, and soon you become a little obsessed with her.
PAIRINGS: jack hughes x fem!reader
WARNINGS: social media stalking, shit talking exes, use of jenna and nicole (nicole is a real person tho!!! bratters gf), use of (y/n)
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if i told you how much i think about her, you’d think i was in love. and if you knew how much i looked at her pictures, you would we’re best friends.
It wasn’t hard to figure out who jack’s ex was. The way he seemed to barely look her way when one of his teammates brought up the fact she was at the game. Instead of sporting a devils jersey, like she used to, she was wearing a rangers jersey, and holding a sign for a rangers player.
it also wasn’t hard to immediately become jealous of her when jack’s teammates talked about how she used to always show up to games. it almost made you feel.. belittled. especially because you had a job, you couldn’t always make jacks games, but he understood that.
by the time the game ended and you sat on a bench, waiting for jack, you’d already find yourself scrolling through her instagram. you looked at every picture, how she was such a pretty blonde. short, tan, blonde, the stereotypical puck bunny. but she knew puck.
for the next fifteen minutes— she stayed on your mind.
‘cause i know her star sign, i know her blood type, i’ve seen every movie she’s been in and god she’s beautiful. i know you loved her, and i know i’m butt hurt— but i can’t help it, no i cant help it.
of course as soon as you and jack got home, you began to search her up online. so invested in your research, when you and jack ‘went to bed,’ you carefully snuck out of the man’s arms and back to your laptop.
she was an actress, of course she was an actress. she starred in a few movies, she was amazing. you bit your nail before quickly exiting the tabs as you heard your boyfriend’s footsteps.
“baby what are you doing up? it’s 12:44, come back to bed.” he spoke, hand rubbing his eyes.
you stood up from the stool and walked over to him, your body pressing against his as your arms wrapped around his torso.
“sorry love, i was just finishing up work.” you lied.
jack just hummed and the two of you went back to your bedroom. your mind began to cloud with thoughts, thoughts of her and jack. did jack treat her the exact same way he treated you? was anything special or was it shared? you know he loved her at one point, but now he loved you, so why stay butt hurt?
i’m so obsessed with your ex, uh huh. i know she’s been asleep on my side of your bed, and i can feel it. i’m staring at her, like i wanna get hurt. and i remember every detail you have ever told me, so be careful baby. IM SO OBSESSED WITH YOUR EX!
it was the second game against the rangers, this time and away game. the blonde was sat in the regular stands while you were in the WAGs suite. you could see her from where you sat, and your eyes burned holes in the back of her head.
thats the woman who had jacks heart before you, the woman who slept on your side of the bed, the woman who cheated on him twice. oh you knew a lot— especially from what jack told you.
“she cheated on me with some guy on the rangers— a real work of art, both of them.” jack told you.
you didn’t realize you were zoning out until nicole, one of the other WAGs, placed a hand on your shoulder.
“you alright there lovie? you seem to be staring at something down there a little too hard.” she asked.
your eyes flickered to her. “yeah im fine— just zoned out. when i get too excited it happens.”
nicole smiled. “well— hopefully our boys can kick the rangers ass. im tired of jenna constantly texting me to rub it in my face that we lost. im not even her friend.”
jenna was jacks ex. that was her name, jenna. she was still texting some of the devils girls? even after everything? you almost laughed, but instead you out on a confused look.
“jenna?” you pretended not to know her.
“oh shes jacks ex— we can’t stand her, especially after what she did to the boy.” nicole told you.
good to know.
she’s got those lips, she’s got those hips, the life of every fuckin’ party. she’s talented, she’s good with kids, she even speaks kindly about me..
the devils won, which called for a celebration in some random club. even though you were still in new york, people congratulated the team on the win. maybe they hated the rangers too, or they were islander fans. you didn’t really expect some of the rangers to show up though, and especially not jenna.
her lips popped with the bright red lip stick she adorned. her hips swayed with every step she took in that mini silver dress. in that moment, she became the life of the party. in that moment, you felt your hands wrap around your body.
that didn’t last for long though, especially not when jack was there. his body pressed against yours as you both danced to the music. his hands gripping your waist, your arms slung around his neck. the sloppy kisses he pressed to your jaw. you had this, she didn’t.
but she had to ruin it. “wow you are so pretty!” her voice rang out. this caused jack to slowly, irritatedly pull away. your hands fell down to his arms as the smile on your face slowly turned fake.
“oh thank you.. uh do i know you?” jacks hand squeezed your waist.
jenna gave a look to jack, which you caught, before looking back at you. “one of jacks exes. you are?” she spoke.
“his girlfriend.”
and i know you love me, and i know it’s crazy.. but every time you call my name, i think you mistake me for her. you both have moved on, you don’t even talk. but i can’t help it, i got issues, i can’t help it baby.
“(y/n), baby?” jacks voice rang through the apartment. your body tensed slightly as his voice, scared that maybe he said the wrong name and that maybe you were just another jenna.
“(y/n)? have you seen my shirt?” he spoke loudly.
you sighed through your nose, “which one?”
jacks footsteps padded on the floor. you hid a smile as you sat at the kitchen island. you expected him to speak, but instead his arms wrapped around you from behind, causing you to let out a laugh.
“well it seems to be right here, isn’t that right?” he pinched at the fabric that draped over your body.
you feigned a look of innocence. “oh, you meant this one?” you smiled.
“when did you put this one on, pretty girl?” he asked you.
“it was the first shirt i found this morning. i dont find it to be too endearing walking around naked.”
jacks lips met the side of your neck, as his hands ran up and under his shirt that you wore. “mm, i dont know, i think that would be pretty nice.”
you let out a laugh as your hand reached back to play with his hair. “and let some random people see me? no thank you.”
“i guess you’re right, wouldn’t want anyone to see whats for my eyes only.” he spoke.
you hummed, feeling his kisses move to your jaw and become sloppier. “lets take this shirt off you, shall we?”
your thoughts disappeared as he dragged you to your room. there was no way he didn’t love you, not after the way he just worshipped you. oh no, he was yours, but his ex was still someone who made you worry.
is she friends with your friends? is she good in bed? do you think about her? no, im fine, it doesn’t matter tell me, is she easy-going? never controlling? well-traveled? well read? oh god, she makes me so upset! im so obsessed with your ex!
as jack left for practice, you couldn’t help but wonder about his ex. the last few questions that ran through your mind. she wasn’t friends with nicole or any of the girls, but what about his friends? her and trevor followed each other, same with her and cole.
does jack think about her often? last night at the club she seemed to piss him off by coming up to you both, maybe thats all? maybe he thinks about how much he hates her? or maybe he misses her— oh god was she good in bed?
was she easy-going? you were easy-going. so who cared. never controlling? you werent that controlling, the only thing you didnt want jack doing was liking random models pictures, and that was a set boundary because he said the same thing about random male models or hockey players (besides friends of course— for the both of you).
god jenna barely did anything to you and she made you so upset. pissed— frustrated, made you wanna pull your hair out.
you were obsessed.
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parkerluvsu · 3 months ago
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Sorry if i'm asking for too much but girl we desperately need a full fic of cowboy!Art 🛐. Like Art seeing another cowboy approach you and him feeling so jealous and possessive even you're not his yet and him finally finding the courage to confess his love to you but you reject him or something and he starts working harder to get you to accept him 🧎‍♀️🛐
omg not asking for too much at all!!! tried to make this as long as i could but im just so bad at translating my thoughts to words so.. hope u like it <3 (also no i don't know anything about cowboys or rodeos so please forgive me)
PonyBoy (Art Donaldson)
cowboy! art donaldson x fem! reader
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late summer nights in july were always your favorite, the captivating sunsets and low-flying june bugs only adding to your enjoyment. usually, people in your small town could be found smoking or knitting on their creaky front porches on a pretty night like this but tonight was a special occasion, with every person who could manage the walk to the outskirts of town or snag a ride in the bed of a truck packed into the rickety seats of the outdoor arena, waiting for the rodeo show to begin. you near the entrance to the venue, tapping your foot anxiously. the most famous rodeo cowboy in your town, art donaldson, is facing another challenger from the next town over. of course you wanted your cowboy to win, there's always been rivalry between your two towns, and now that there was an outlet to outperform each other, both towns showed out for their cowboys.
art donaldson had been the talk of the town since he hit the scene a couple years ago, renowned for his skills and many trophies in rodeos across the state but especially popular among young women and men who found themselves extremely attracted to his strong frame and pretty blond hair. you never caught onto the craze though, thinking he was too good to be true. you'd been scorned a few times in your life by those pretty cowboy types, so you just leaned back in your seat and watched as fans of art crowded around the entrance where he would soon emerge.
as the lights dim over the arena the crowds roars become louder, the claps and woops of fans young and old echoing through the space. you almost have to cover your ears when the announcer yells at the crowd to settle down and welcome the challenger from the neighboring town. boos and yells now fill the stadium, as arts opponent preens at the attention coming from the crowd, tipping his obscenely huge cowboy hat at you, winking smugly. you roll your eyes, turning your head to the spotlight illuminating the entrance where art would soon emerge. the energy in the arena immediately changed when art entered the ring, and even you couldn't resist standing up and clapping and cheering for him like the rest of the fans in the crowd. you swore you felt his eyes on you when he was waving at the crowd, but you were just imagining it.. right?
the rodeo goes by in a flash, you're not surprised that art comes out on top in the end. he rides his horse in a celebratory circle around the ring, when he gets to your section your stomach drops as he tips his hat at you, a small smirk on his face. you look away, reasoning that he probably does this with every girl he sees, a big celebrity like him is sure to be a playboy.
exiting the arena, you looked for your car in the parking lot, lost in the sea of beat up pickups. not looking where you were going, you suddenly hit a wall of muscle, looking up, immediately annoyed before you notice a familiar smirk. "art.. art donaldson?" you step back, looking around for his roadies and drunk friends that always seem to follow him around. "in the flesh darlin'" he flashes that smirk again and you have to fight the urge to roll your eyes. "no offence but shouldnt you be like at an after party or something? you won today, im sure you'd get free drinks at any bar in town" you don't mean to stereotype him but.. he truly seems like the type to have a different girl hanging off his arm every night. he smiles, "parties ain't really my thing, actually i was hoping id find you out here". you look at him with raised eyebrows, wondering if he's got you mixed up with another girl. "see, well i saw you in the crowd, most people at these things just go crazy for me but, honestly you didn't seem too interested at all" he shrugs. you shake your head, hoping he's not out here to lecture you about his sport, "no, no that's not it.. i just don't exactly have interest in watching men preen themselves, i mean your opponent was being a total duche to me". he frowns immediately, "are you serious? jesus.. im sorry darlin' ill keep my eye out for him, wouldn't want you to get scared and never come see me again.." he trails off. you tap your foot on the ground hoping he'll get to the point soon. art catches your drift, "well anyway, i was wondering if you'd let me prove you wrong, im a little more than a famous cowboy yknow". you look around, almost expecting cameras to pop out and announce you were on some sort of prank show. "are you kidding?" he shakes his head. "listen i.. i don't doubt that you're fun or whatever but i don't date celebrities" you say matter-of-factly. he frowns, finally taking off his hat for the first time that night, letting you see his slightly sweaty blond hair, curled in the heat, "you're kidding. i promise, just lemme take you on one date-" you cut him off, pressing a finger to his lips, "i said i don't date celebrities. im flattered really, but i have my morals. goodnight ponyboy" he bristles at the nickname and you giggle, turning quickly and letting out a breath of air you didn't know you were holding. you barely register his call after you, "just gimme a call princess, ill prove you wrong!". you shake your head, finally making it to your car and shutting the door, placing your head on the steering wheel. that couldn't have actually just happened.. the art donaldson hitting on you.. you knew all the girls in your town would kill for a chance to be in your place, and they would never turn him down. driving along the winding roads to your house, you bite your lip, wondering if you made the right choice. shaking your head slightly you push the idea out of your mind, he's probably out finding another girl to flatter and take home. it was settled, you wouldn't think about him anymore. but as your head hit the pillow that night the last thing you thought of was that stupid smirk of his.
the rest of your week goes on like normal, repeating your routine every day, without thought of your weird encounter with art. it's wednesday, meaning the local farmers market is open. you grab your bag and head out into the world, immediately wishing you grabbed a hat to shield you from the sun. making you way down to the center of town, bustling with buyers and sellers of fresh food. you walked around the market, thinking about what you needed, you stopped at a peach stand to look at your list, not noticing who was next to you. "so we meet again sweetheart.." you recognize the drawl of the familiar cowboy next to you, letting out a deep sigh. "are you following me ponyboy?" you question, looking up at his blue eyes, shadowed by his cowboy hat. art shakes his head, chucking at you, and you hate to admit it but it's a very attractive chuckle. "no, 'course not, you turned me down remember? i know when im not wanted.." the way he says that, you almost get offended. "i- you know i didn't mean it like that, i just don't date celebrities, no matter who they are" you say, looking up at the now very confused peach farmer, looking between the both of you. you pay for your peaches and leave, and to your (partial) annoyance you hear arts cowboy boots against the gravel behind you. "can i ask you somethin'?" you nod, and art takes his place at your side. "why don't you date celebrities, just curious of course" you smile, shaking your head, he really won't give up, will he? "well, i guess i just don't think they're real, too good to be true yknow? most of the once ive seen are just total players, i feel like it's in their nature to be greedy and always want more. no offence obviously.." art nods along with what you're saying, truly looking like he's thinking about it. "geez, you're an expert on the topic aren't you? i would hate to find out you think of me that way, cuz i really aint that type of guy" art looks down at you, walking slowly to match your pace. "well.." you look him up and down, "you don't exactly have the presence of someone who likes to keep to themselves" art laughs, now letting silence seep between you as you make your way back to your home. arts quiet presence is surprisingly comforting for a showboat like him, if you closed your eyes you probably wouldn't even notice he was there. reaching the porch of your house you turn to face him, not sure what to say next. art takes off his hat, placing it on his heart, "let me prove you wrong. please, im begging you sweetheart, ill do anything you want me to do to convince you" your eyes widen, shocked at the sudden advance. "you.. aren't gonna let this go are you?" he shakes his head quickly, "not at all, no." you sigh, "you're very sweet art but.. i don't even know you-" he cuts you off. "then get to know me, i won't disappoint you darlin'" you weigh the options in your mind, the cons and the pros of the situation, with art right in front of you, you can't help but take a chance. "alright, alright. one date okay ponyboy? one." his face lights up immediately, placing his hat back on his head. "thank you, thank you seriously, ill prove you wrong about me" you nod at his promise. "i should get inside but.." he nods, looking almost sad at the thought of you leaving. "alright.. ill pick you up tomorrow at seven, does that work for you" he's eager, more eager than you'd expect, and you're flattered. you agree, heading inside and preparing for the next day.
one date turns into two, then three, the next minute you're seeing each other every night. most of the time art comes to your place, he tells you it's because he doesn't really have a permanent residence at the moment, but you know he does it just to get to know you better, peeking through your books and trinkets, looking for something to boost his knowledge about you. he cooks too, something you didn't expect from him at all, to his credit, he's absolutely proving you wrong, but you'd never admit that to him, he's too cocky as it is. he hardly ever talks about rodeo when he's with you, separation of work and pleasure he tells you, but truthfully he just doesn't want you to see him as that celebrity, he just wants to be art with you. and you let him be normal with you, spending lazy days in bed with him, not worrying about anything. you can't imagine your life without him anymore, he's there when you wake up, when you're preparing breakfast and going about your chores for the day, he's there, when you get in bed for the night he's certainly there too. he'd never tell you, but he thanks his lucky stars when you fall asleep in his arms, he shudders thinking about where he'd be if you turned him down. luckily, he'd never have to think about that anymore, now that he was yours, your ponyboy.
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