#i had a really good energy day. i was awake at 8 in the morning and hung out with my mother in law from 10 to 4
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southernvampire · 1 year ago
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#i had a really good energy day. i was awake at 8 in the morning and hung out with my mother in law from 10 to 4#we went shopping and got food and it was a really good day#but it wasnt enough. the moment i got home i realized how tired my body was and i took two naps#i woke up from my last nap over an hour ago and i still feel like im in a twilight state of consciousness#im so tired but my dream was ao vivid and real despite being nonsensical that it freaked me out and i dont want to go back to sleep#but im also so emotionally fragile and cant watch videos without something making me want to cry#im supposed to go on my honeymoon in two weeks to disney world. objectively not a good place to go with low energy and weak muscles#but i wanted to go back so bad and didnt want to keep putting it off since i might be like this forever#yet the idea of me getting this exhausted each day is making me wonder if im wasting our money and that we wont have fun bc of me#like this was the best day energy wise ive had in almost a year and i feel this awful now. how am i supposed to last a week at disney?#we've been spending 3 years waiting to have money and time for our honeymoon#ugh. im not ok. i just want a new body so i wont feel like im dying every other day#im just hoping that we chose a good time to go to avoid crowds as much as possible to reduce the chance of getting covid#bc i cant just keep waiting for covid to be gone to do things. i can mask but i cant stay home almost all the time anymore or else i will go#insane#i want to just live life and not constantly worry about getting covid from going to a store but i also dont know whats wrong with me#and wont see my specialist until december so i dont want to get really sick and mess up my health even more#i havent gotten covid yet though so hopefully that will continue. triple vaxed and it seems to be working for me#i'll still be careful though but i hope i have the energy to have fun bc these past 3 years have been trying to kill me with trauma
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c00kieguy · 2 months ago
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Mornings are sometimes OK
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relationships: Feixiao x GN!Reader summary: Feixiao’s morning routine but she’s dating you and you are oh so sleepy.  cw: none, just fluff, reader is called cute once wc: 1k a/n: Last Feixiao thing if I don’t get her today btw. So if you want me to keep writing for her send me your prayers please and thank you 🙏 /s
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7:00
You groan in your sleep as the annoying continuous beeps of the alarm clock ring through the room. The sharp noise pierces your mind in an uncomfortable way you did not feel like experiencing at the moment. Thankfully the noise stops as Feixiao slaps the clock away.
“Morning.” she utters groggily as she turns to face you. In your drowsy state you barely manage to reply as you feel Feixiao’s lips on your cheek.
Oh.
You smile to yourself, morning kisses were always your favorite, but just as you attempt to reciprocate she’s off. In a split second she’s up and opening the curtains to let in the gentle morning sunlight. You sigh to yourself as the soft rays hit your face, you’ll get her later.
But you still miss her presence. Clumsily you reach for her pillow to use it as a substitute and hopefully get a few more hours of sleep in. Just because Feixiao had to wake up this early didn’t mean you had to as well. Holding the pillow close you get yourself comfortable again, the soft thuds of Feixiao’s footsteps as she uses the treadmill working as good background noise to lull you back into sleep. The way she managed to brush her teeth and change into her workout clothes in such a short time was something you were used to now.
8:30
You swore you had only been sleeping for a few seconds before you were awoken once more by Feixiao. “Morning sleepy head.” she says, but despite her teasing tone she places a small peck on your forehead. You really wished you had more energy to respond to her but in your tired state you only mutter a small ‘morning’ which draws a chuckle out of the general. “Breakfast?” squinting at her through blurry eyes you do your best to sound coherent.
“Mhmm whatever you’re having…” you mumble. As soon as the words leave your lips she’s out the door, you can’t help but wonder where she gets all her energy from. If you had even a fraction of that much enthusiasm in your daily life you were sure you’d be somewhere else entirely right now.
Letting out a yawn you snuggle back into the comfort of your bed, just a few more minutes won’t hurt right?
Too bad. The door bursts open in what seems like mere minutes later as Feixiao rushes to you. You almost feel like you were seeing two of her with just how fast she was. Gentle hands brush your messy hair away from your face and you get yet another peck on the cheek “Food’s in the hot box.” Already? you think to yourself as she zooms away again. Well now you have no choice but to wake up soon. Your wonderful girlfriend went through the trouble of making you breakfast, what kind of partner would you be if you let it get cold?
Despite your guilt you decide to sleep a few more minutes anyway. Who could blame you? Whatever it is that this bed was made of made it incredibly hard to get out of it. You place your hopes in the hot box and once again feel yourself drift off the sleep.
10:00
To your dismay the alarm goes off once more, but luckily at this point you were mostly awake having slept an extra two hours or so. Begrudgingly you switch off the alarm and wonder how it hasn’t broken yet despite being knocked to the ground every morning by Feixiao. Suddenly you hear the roaring sound of a hair dryer, yea you’re definitely awake now…Reluctantly you prop yourself up on your elbows just as Feixiao rushes to check the clock. 
“Still got time” she says under her breath. You can’t help but let out a large yawn watching her get ready, you truly were not feeling it today (or any day if you had to be honest). You don’t even notice when Feixiao stands in front of you, but you do notice the warmth on your nose as she kisses it. “Time to wake up.” 
You let out yet another yawn “Morning…” you whispered to no one in particular as Feixiao had already rushed off to change. It only takes her a split second to get into her formal clothes before she starts running around the room cleaning up things. Meanwhile the greatest thing you managed to achieve today was sitting up on the bed.
“I’ll be home by midnight, you can eat out if you want.” She states. For once today, Feixiao stops to take in everything, and by everything she meant mostly you. There was something really comforting seeing you in this state, drowsy and barely able to hold your head up, hair and clothes an absolute mess, and eyes you could barely keep open. You looked so cute she was almost tempted enough to stay back today, and she really would’ve if it wasn’t for the meeting. 
Feixiao can’t help the small smile that makes its way to her face. She sighs to herself, oh how she couldn’t wait to come back home to you. Taking slow steps she makes her way to your side as you stare up at her in confusion. Wasn’t she running late?
Just then she places your hand under your chin to make you face her and gently places her lips on your own.
Oh.
You lean into the chaste kiss, almost wanting to reach out and hold her closer but you let it be. Some things are best enjoyed as is.
Eventually she pulls away leaving you a little flushed. “Love you.” She whispers, as if the words were reserved for only you.
“Love you too.” you barely manage to get your words out before she zooms out the door and you can’t help but chuckle, only Feixiao.
However, seeing as your early bird girlfriend was off, you felt yourself being more and more tempted by the bed, a short nap should be ok right? You ask yourself, knowing full well the ‘short nap’ would end up as a very long sleep. But since Feixiao would be out the whole day you really saw no harm in sleeping in and having your breakfast for lunch instead. 
Unfortunately for you, your tactics were all too predictable. Just as your head rests on your pillow the door is practically knocked down by Feixiao saying “Don’t you dare.”, the sudden noise nearly knocking you off the bed.
Needless to say you had a very productive morning, against your will.
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© c00kieguy ➼ do not repost/copy/translate (without my permission) or claim any of my works as your own. Reblogs are appreciated ❣
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owliellder · 1 year ago
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All Pent Up
MDNI 18+
Puppy Hybrid! Leon Kennedy x afab! Reader
Word count: 3.85k
Warnings: Porn w/ plot, unprotected p in v (stay safe), no use of y/n, spanking, crying, slight ass-play.
Description: After a long night at work, you come home to a very pent up Leon. A trip to the park to help with that energy turns a little sour.
Tags: Submissive! Leon, neck biting/marking, begging, cunnilingus, knotting, mommy kink, fluff, near illegal amounts of praise AND aftercare, a lovely creampie to end the morning
Not proofread. I am once again sat here bored at work. More self indulgence since I work the same kind of job aforementioned in this lmao.
Also VERY much inspired by @abp0rns art of puppy Leon, specifically the two I put below the crop. Please check out their art they gotta be one of my favorite doodlers out there.
Edit: cross posted onto Ao3 if it's easier for you to read there (cause it is for me)
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It had been an incredibly boring night at work for you. Working graveyard at a gatehouse meant you did practically nothing. Easy money, sure, but you can only watch so many movies and doodle so much before it becomes redundant.
The only thing keeping you going was making sure your puppy, Leon, stayed happy and comfortable. You'd found him at the shelter a few months back, and though you never considered yourself to be a hybrid kinda person, Leon was just too damn cute at that shelter.
After adopting the hybrid, you quickly fell into a nice afterwork routine; come home, get jumped by Leon, make breakfast while he asked a plethora of questions about your night and made sure you knew just how much he missed you by licking and slobbering all over you. He was the sweetest boy, but man was he excitable.
Some mornings, you'd come home a bit more awake than others. It was random and you're not sure what made that so, but today was apparently one of those days.
~
"-sosososo glad you're home, mommy! I've been so lonely and bored without you!" Leon happily talked on after you'd walked through the door, his golden fur covered tail thumping loudly against the back of the couch. You remained quiet as you let him ramble, reaching up to pet through his messy bedhead with a smile. "I chewed on my toys, broke one of the squeakers though, but you've gotten me plenty of other toys for me to play with!! I really like this fluffy red pig you got me-!"
He continued to talk loudly about everything he did after you left for work only 8 hours prior, running around to grab and show you his chewed up toy and his favorite toy, tail continuing to wag avidly all the while.
"Alright, alright.. settle down, Leon.." You spoke up, cutting off his talk about laying in your bed so you could take a moment to shed your work clothes in favor of some more comfortable lounge wear; an old, faded graphic tee and a pair of soft sweatpants.
The hybrid followed you throughout the apartment while continuing to ramble, albeit a lot quieter now. Clearly Leon had a lot of energy this morning, which wasn't unusual by any means, but since you weren't all that tired this morning you decided that a trip to the dog park would be a good way for him to get some much needed exercise and enrichment.
After making breakfast, you dressed your puppy in a cozy outfit since it was always little chilly in the mornings where you lived, damn cold desert. You only had to reach for the leash for him to start jumping and yapping enthusiastically, making it rather difficult to hook it onto his collar.
You decided to stay in your comfy clothes, seeing as it would keep you warm enough until the sun warmed the air outside.
"Do you think Chris will be there?! Can you text his owner?? Who else is gonna be there?! I can smell the park from here!-" Leon rambled excitedly as he tugged you along to the park, smelling every bush and tree the two of you passed thoroughly. His tail never stopped wagging, those soft floppy ears perked forwards as he moved his head every which way, focusing in on every movement and sound while beelining to the park. He knew the way there, the leash was just to make sure you didn't get lost.
The air was cool the, sun beginning to warm you up. It was starting to bring out your exhaustion, but you wanted Leon to get at least half an hour of playtime in so he wouldn't bug you while you slept later. The thought alone made it easy for you to power through that brain fog that threatened to settle in.
You and Leon walked across the street once the tall chainlink fence that bordered the dog park was in view, the Golden Retriever hybrid practically dragging you to the other side of the street as his excitement grew. There were always other hybrids out early in the morning, the cool mornings were nicer for walks compared to the hot afternoons, at least in your opinion.
Leon was rubbing himself along the side of the fence, sniffing with a large goofy smile on his face. He had playmates that were normally here around this time, namely Chris, a German Shepard hybrid. Though Chris was a little bigger than Leon, they always played nicely, never having gotten into any sort of scuffle.
Chris was quick to notice Leon, running up to the fence so he could sniff him. They rapidly got each other riled up, so the moment you made it to the gate you unhooked the leash from Leon's collar. This wasn't so he didn't get choked out when he launched into the park, no, it was because the last time you forgot to unhook his leash first, you were yanked face first into soggy grass and mud.
The second you unlatched the gate, Leon pushed it open. He sprinted into the grassy park, Chris not far behind before tackling the smaller hybrid with a playful growl. The two roughhoused, chased each other, and played tug-of-war with a stick Chris had found.
You decided to sit on a bench not too far from where the boys played, looking up from your phone every minute or so to make sure their play didn't turn ugly.
Only 30 minutes had gone by before- "Mommy! Mommy!" Leon shouted from across the park, prompting you to look up from your phone. It only took a moment for your eyes to nearly bulge out of your head when you spotted a now brown Leon. His tail wagged, slapping loudly against the thick puddle of mud he was laying sideways in. "Looklooklook! Chris and I found a ball!" he yelled with a grin, Chris holding up the muddy ball high in the air so you could see it.
You sat there dumbfounded for a brief moment before letting your head fall back, breathing in and letting out a deep sigh as your eyes closed. You tilted your head forwards again, letting your eyes open slowly as your annoyance showed clear on your face.
Your puppy could see your expression change even from where he was, his ears drooping more than they were as the mud had weighed them down a bit. Seems like playtime was over.
Chris' owner wasn't all that happy either, walking over to the filthy hybrids only a few seconds sooner than you did. You pulled Leon from the mud by the collar since he seemed a bit stuck, glaring weakly at the now cowering puppy.
"Leon is always getting Chris into some sort of mess." Chris' owner huffed out, clearly irritated with the situation. You frowned, running your free hand over your face with a soft sigh. "I'm sorry, Leon just seems to really like the mud lately. I can't help that Chris follows, but I'll try to keep Leon from the mud." You didn't really care for someone implying your Golden Retriever puppy was a bad dog, but the idea of confrontation mixed with your ever-growing exhaustion was enough to have you just let it go.
After apologizing again, you let Leon shake off the excess mud from his body before hooking the leash to his collar once more, beginning to pull him towards the gate. He was very resistant to leaving, whining and whimpering something fierce. "I'm sorry! ImsorryImsorry! Please I'll be good! Let me stay a little longer mommy! Please I'm sorry! Mommy!"
As pitiful as he sounded, you now had to squeeze a thorough bath in for the hybrid before you were even able to think about sleeping. You continued to drag him along as he fought against you, crying out softly as you finally got him through the gate, closing it before he could run back through.
Your exhaustion was making you irritable, and having to fight to get Leon back home was enough to make you angry. It got even worse when he growled at you.
You stopped walking, the entrance to your apartment building only a few feet away. Turning around to face him, he immediately shrunk down at your furious glare. "Bad boy, Leon." Your voice was harsh, yet also so calm, it scared him. He hated being a bad boy, he never wanted to hear those words together again.
After you started walking again, he followed obediently, staying silent all the way into your apartment. He stood stiffly by the front door once you closed it, watching you stomp away. The puppy was on the verge of tears, his muddy tail tucked between his legs and his ears flat against his head.
Leon's bottom lip trembled the longer he couldn't see you, his ears twitching a bit as he picked up on the sound of the bath faucet turning on. His hands were clasped in front of his legs, head down in shame.
"Leon!" You called out from the bathroom, your tone still laced with irritation, he could definitely tell that much. The hybrid quickly shuffled to the bathroom, trying his best not to get clumps of dried up mud on the carpet along the way.
Leon stood in the bathroom doorway before you gently dragged him in, making silent work of his clothes that were absolutely caked in mud. He knew what to do afterwards, quietly seating himself in the bath, shoulders slumped. The bath was silent except for Leon's weak attempts to apologize, his voice faltering every time once he looked at your face. Your eyebrows were furrowed and you just looked so disinterested.
After the bath, you shooed the puppy off with a towel draped over his shoulders, lazily washing off his collar in the dirty bath water before unplugging the tub.
Leon sat in the living room, drying himself off as best as he could with the towel. Even after, he shook himself off on instinct, the towel left discarded on the floor. He had sat himself on the couch, still slouched with a strong pout on his face.
He knew he was in trouble. His stomach sank when you walked out and stood in front of him with that same irritated look. You then walked and sat next to him on the left. "Lay across my lap, Leon."
The Golden Retriever hybrid whimpered, though he did as he was told, laying himself so his abdomen was laying on your lap, his tail still tucked between his legs. He yipped when you grabbed the base of his damp tail with your left hand, roughly untucking it so you could get a clear view of his ass. "Look at me, Leon."
He turned his head and tilted it back slightly so he could look up at you, his eyes sad and watery. He didn't have anything to say for himself. "You growled at me. You've never growled at me before." You sounded upset, and you were. You didn't want to punish your sweet boy, but him growling at you for something so insignificant deeply bothered you.
Sighing, you pulled his tail up away from his ass even further, grip tightening on it as you felt him try and tuck it back between his legs again. Wordlessly, you drew your other hand back, a sharp smack along with a cry from Leon ringing out in the quiet apartment. You hated having to do this, but he needed to learn.
A few harsh spanks later and the hybrid's ass was bright red and sore, tears spilling down his face as he sobbed out barely comprehensible apologizes in between loud cries every time you brought your hand down on his tender behind. His hands gripped the couch cushion tightly, those pitiful sobs of his tugging at your heart.
Once you feel Leon'd learned his lesson, you gently ran your hand along both his ass cheeks, soothing the hot and red skin while your other hand caressed the base of his tail. You waited until his crying quieted to talk to him again, listening to him sniffle wetly as you let go of his tail to wipe away his snot and tears.
"Okay, okay... there you go, sweet boy. All done. I'm all done..." you whispered to the whimpering puppy hybrid in your lap, shifting your body sideways so he could climb up and lay his head against your chest. You combed your fingers through his hair with one hand while the other stroked the side of his face, clearing the few stray tears that continued to fall.
Leon buried his face into your chest, hiccuping out muffled apologies as he brought his hands up to wrap around you. "I'm sorry mommy. So-.. sososo sorry... Didn't mean to, mommy..."
As he trembled against you, you couldn't help but feel terrible for punishing him that way. He'd never been bad before, the punishment really shouldn't have been so harsh..
You waited until he quieted to speak up again, tilting your head to the side slightly so you could see his face a little better. "...you took that so well, Leon. Such a good boy for mommy, huh?" Despite the suggestive undertone, you made sure to talk softly, careful not to upset the delicate puppy on your chest.
He lifted his head up slightly, nodding weakly as his eyes turned glassy once more. "Please.. I'll-I'll be a good boy for you m-mommy. I'm sorry- I'm so so sorry mommy- I didn't mean to growl- ImsorryImsorryIm-"
You shushed him, running your hand from the side of his face up through his hair as he began to cry again. "You're a good boy, Leon. I forgive you, baby.."
All Leon wanted to do was make this right. He never wanted to be a bad boy again. He hated the way you spoke to him, the way you had looked at him. It was so scary, he wasn't a bad boy, no, he wasn't.
His mind was flooded with everything he could possibly do to make it up to you, tears falling onto your shirt as he pulled himself up off of you. He crawled backwards and sat back on his haunches, giving you a wary look as he tucked his fingers under the waistband of your sweatpants.
"Oh, Leon, sweetheart, you don't have to-" "Please..." Leon's meek voice cut you off, making you pause for a moment before nodding with a smile. His hands trembled as he pulled your sweatpants down, taking your panties with them. The hybrid hiccuped again before bringing his head down between your thighs, putting your legs over his shoulders as he cautiously placed his hands onto the points of your hips
It only took a second before he shoved his face into your cunt, whimpering at your smell and taste as he licked between your folds. You gasped, feeling his tongue eagerly lap up your slick as it leaked out of you, his low whimpers vibrating deliciously against you. "Leon~... oh~.. easy, boy..."
You reached a hand down to gently stroke his hair, attempting to get the puppy hybrid to calm down a bit still. He was obviously so eager to please, though he was still shaken up by the punishment; tears falling from his eyes, quiet sobs muffled by your pussy, eyes closed, and cheeks flushed a beautiful pink. His tail had started to wag again and you were relieved to see it sway slowly. You just wanted to see your puppy happy and excitable again like he always was.
Leon continued to lap at your cunt, keeping himself firmly buried in it. His breathing was a bit shaky but you just let him do what he needed to do, reaching your hand to the right a bit so you could stroke one of his soft floppy ears. He sighed at the feeling, his tail wagging a little faster.
"That's a good boy, Leon~... god- such a good boy for his mommy.." You praised the hybrid as he worked his mouth on you, the praise causing him to whine into your cunt. His eyes peaked open, looking up at you as small tears fell from them. "Good boy~..." You ran your hand down to stroke your thumb between his eyes, prompting him to close them again with a sigh.
Your words encouraged him further, sucking at your clit when his tongue wasn't buried inside of you. The puppy hybrid licked all around, making sure none of your sweet slick was left to waste. He eased his grip on your hips, partially worried he would hurt you, but mostly cause he adored the way you writhed when you drew close to your orgasm. He relished in how you pulled his head impossibly closer, practically grinding against his face, using him. What a good boy he was.
Leon was in heaven when you came, whimpering into your cunt as you gushed against his face. He made sure to lick up everything he could, even dipping down to your ass for a minute, tongue flat against the puckered hole. He'd be mad if he saw the couch got some of your juices.
After a moment, he pulled his head away, resting the side of his slick covered face against your thigh as he looked up at you with those puppy-dog eyes that you just couldn't resist. You knew what he wanted, and who were you to deny him?
"My good boy wanna fuck his mommy? Show his mommy what a good boy he is?" You whispered, to which he eagerly nodded in response, his ears perking up. You could hear his tail thump lazily against the back cushion of the couch, all the while watching him lick his lips. "I-I'll be a good boy for mommy. I'm a good boy-..good boy for mommy.." he mumbled quietly, hoisting himself up onto his haunches again after carefully laying your legs down off his shoulders. His thick cock was leaking pre-cum, flushed red at the tip while his knot was fully swollen. It was hard to look away.
Leon continued to mumble to himself, almost like he was trying to convince himself that he was a good boy. His breathing was still shaky as he watched you flip over, your ass up in the air while you rested your elbows on the armrest of the couch.
The poor thing was practically drooling at the sight of you, frozen in place, just staring at your glistening pussy. Your voice snapped him out of his trance, a hushed "Pretty boy..." causing him to lurch forward and mount you without further hesitation.
You cried out as he shoved his cock into you halfway, stopping only to grab the skin right above your collarbone with his teeth. He made sure he was positioned properly, shifting slightly before pushing his throbbing dick all the way. He whined at the way your slick walls gripped him, his knot pressed firmly against the outside of your cunt.
Leon's teeth broke skin as he began to piston in and out of you. He was drooling, whimpering, moaning, and his tail was wagging so fast. He loved the way his mommy felt, gripping his so tightly, sucking his thick cock in.
His let go of your skin to lick at gently, which was a stark contrast to his fast and rough thrusts. "So sorry mommy- sososo sorry.. never growl at you again- ah~..! I-I'll be mommy's good-.. good boy.."
The hybrid panted next to your ear, reaching his hands up and under your loose shirt to grip and massage your breasts. His fingers pinched and tugged at your sensitive nipples, causing you to moan loudly. You could feel every bit of his cock as he slammed it into you over and over again, the tip kissing your cervix which made you hiss at the slight pain it caused.
"Gonna- hnghh~.. gonna fill mommy up.. gonna be mommy's best boy again..." Leon whined, tilting his head to the side so he could nip at your neck, kissing and licking under your jaw. He sucked numerous hickeys down your neck, making quick work of the other side as well. He wanted you to remember how good he was for you, how much he was willing to do to make things better, what a good boy he was for you.
It didn't take long for him to near his own orgasm, his chin resting over your shoulder as his hands had worked their way back to your hips. He was so close; the sounds of your moans, the sinful way your pussy squelched with slick as he fucked into you, your smell, the lingering taste of you on his tongue, everything was just so overwhelming.
The puppy hybrid didn't have the words to give you warning, only a long drawn out whine as his hips stuttered forward, knot stretching you open. You came again from the feeling, barely being able to clench around his knot. It was just so big.
With his cum pumping into you, you could only groan pleasantly at the feeling of being so full, his knot having basically plugged you to the point that none of it could escape.
You could partially register Leon running his hands up and down your body, anywhere he could reach in his position, bunching up your shirt in the process. His large hands felt nice, helping you come down from your high. He was whispering something, you couldn't make out what, but it was probably the same thing he'd been spewing before.
~
After Leon was able to pull out of you, you made sure to reassure him over and over that he was your good boy, and he'd always be your good boy.
You made him a little snack once you'd cleaned yourself and him up, seeing as the park and your at-home playtime had influenced his appetite quite a bit. You loved to see him happy again; those beautiful blue eyes crinkled with a smile as that fluffy tail of his wagged.
Your body finally realized how tired it was once more, your brain catching up with that as well. You waved Leon, who was elated to follow you, into your room, practically bounding in like a deer. He begged to lay the way you two did on the couch, and again, who were you to deny him?
You laid back, head on your pillow as Leon nestled himself on top of you. He laid his head on your chest, turning his head to the left as he rested his arms on either side of you, his hands just barely tucked up under your pillow after pulling the blankets up over the both of you.
"You're the greatest boy anyone could ask for, Leon. Always taking such good care of me.." you whispered as his eyes closed, his tail going from a lazy wag to a stop as he fell asleep.
"I love you, my sweet boy.."
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the-froschamethyst4 · 6 months ago
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The Sun isn’t even Down
𖤐Paring: Husband! Alejandro x Tired! Wife! Readers
𖤐Pronouns: She/Her
𖤐Warnings: fluff, married couple, some hints of smut, flirting, language, kissing, badly translated Spanish, mention of children,
𖤐Summary: Y/n and Alejandro have married for 5+ years now, and Alejandro still can't get over how many times this girl takes naps
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8:00AM
Alejandro sits on the couch after waking up, he made his cup of coffee, and sipping on it as he tries to find something to watch on the TV.
As he settled with a random channel and watched it he could hear the sound of shuffling, knowing it was his wife, he smiles looking over the couch seeing her.
Messy hair, over sized t-shirt, no short or pants, and fuzzy animal slippers. She let's out a yawn and made herself her own cup of coffee.
"You look so beautiful," he says.
"I look like I was fighting with a rat...and the rat won," she says, pouring her creamer into her mug and moving to her husband, placing her mug on the coffee table in front of them, her feet propped up on the table and she hugs his side earning a smile from his lips.
As he focused back on the TV, it wasn't long till he hears soft snores. He looks down and sees Y/n passed out.
"Really? You just woke up," he whispers.
Alejandro and Y/n have been married for 5+ years, and all Y/n seemed to do in her spare time was sleep. She works of course and she puts on a fake smile and chugs close to 3 cups of coffee just to keep herself awake and an energy drink coming close behind the coffee.
She tries to stay awake at work, but once she's home kicking her heels off, she plops on the couch and sleeps for who knows how long could be an hour and could be 7, it depends on her day.
Hell there was time she came home at 6 in the afternoon and fell asleep not waking till 5:30 the next morning.
Alejandro rubbed her messy hair, she stirs in her sleep and opened her eyes.
"I was sleeping."
"You just woke up 10 seconds ago," he tells her with a chuckle.
"I didn't get any good sleep last night."
"Mi amor, you were passed out, I tried to wake you up to roll over back on your side and you didn't, so I had to sleep on the little space I had."
"Well, you hog the covers."
"You do that too, amor (love)," she just pouts as Alejandro chuckled and kissed her temple. "You're so cure when you pout," he says.
Y/n's phone started to ring seeing it was her mother-in-law, Carmen.
"Why is my mami calling you?"
"Shh," Y/n shushed her husband and rolled over her side facing away from Alejandro and answered her mother-in-law with a yawn coming out.
Alejandro just listened to Y/n as she spoke to his mother. His mom was very loving towards Y/n, Alejandro was very nervous his family might not like her, but boy was he wrong.
If Carmen wanted to, she'd probably would've adopt Y/n.
"Mami!" Alejandro says next to Y/n's ear.
"Yeah, that was your son," Y/n says, picking at her overgrown nails needing them to be cut and polished. "She says hi."
"I wanna hear her say that-MAMI!" Alejandro took his wife's phone, she allowed him to take it and she rolls over to face him. "Mama, por que no me llamas? (Mommy, why don't you call me?)" He whines to his mother.
Y/n could just barely hear her mother-in-law. "Ocupado! Desde cuando? (busy! since when?)" He says. He groans and gives the phone back to his wife who kept talking to each other on their pervious topic.
"Rude," Alejandro says as Y/n shooed him away.
--------
10:13AM
Alejandro was getting ready for him to go to the gym, putting on a sleeveless shirt, gym shorts and his tennis shoes. He found his headphone making sure they were connected to his phone.
He jogs down the stairs seeing the channel was changed to something else, he smiles and leans over the couch, seeing his wife.
Asleep
Of course. Alejandro scoffs and gently taps her butt jolting her awake from the sudden smack on her bare butt. She smacks his hand away earning a chuckle. She jokingly took her slipper off hitting his arm.
"Asshole, I was dreaming about the beach," she says.
"I know, amor," he leans over the couch kissing her cheek giving her one more pat on the butt and walking to the front door. "I'm heading to the gym...do you want me to help you with the garden?"
If Alejandro mentions something like helping with the garden or having to do anything around the house, Y/n will usually stay up and do it.
"Huh? The garden? I mean...I can do it..." she says, popping her head over the couch to look at her husband.
"You sure?" She just nods. "Okay, I'll be back," he says, walking out of the house.
Y/n rubs her tired eyes and goes upstairs stretching and getting some clothes on. A black tank top and some jean shorts.
--------
12:00PM
Y/n tried to stay awake as she was digging some holes in the freshly de-weeded garden patch. Alejandro spent all day yesterday taking out weeds, a watering the dirt to make it easy for Y/n to plant in the garden and with the rain from last night also helped.
Y/n teared the seed packet of sunflowers and planting them. She sits on the knees wiping sweat from her forehead, she took a swing of her water when something soft brushed against her.
She turns seeing the neighborhood street cat brush up against her. He didn't belong to anyone, but she called him Pinto Bean or Bean for short, his little paw pads look like Pinto Beans hints his name.
She coos at him and picks him up kissing his soft head. No one else can pick him up scared he might be carrying around diseases or something, but he loves Y/n because she feeds him and give him attention, but still let's him roam around.
She placed him back on the ground and he stayed with her the entire time she was planting the garden. She could hear a loud exhaust, she looks up seeing Alejandro pulling into the driveway.
Bean stayed by her as Alejandro popped out of his car.
"What's the cat doing here?" He asked.
"He's helping, leave him alone, Alejandro," Alejandro doesn't like the fact that Bean comes around looking for food and attention from Y/n.
"Go shoo-"
"Alejandro!" Y/n smacks her husbands leg. Bean crawled onto Y/n lap as she was still putting seeds into the ground.
----------
Alejandro sat in a lawn chair with water in his hand as he watched Y/n, she bends over in the dirt planting tomato's next. He watched as her butt was on display in front of him, he couldn't help but smirk.
He gets up and walks behind her, she sees a shadow loom over her. She looks up to him standing over her.
"What?"
"You just look so sexy, all dirty, sweaty, the sun beating on you, you small huffs of breaths...you drive me insane, amor," he bends down kissing her lips, cupping her cheeks to deepen the kiss.
"A-Alejandro, not now...please."
"Tired?" She nods as he chuckles picking her up and taking her into the house.
------------
5:00PM
Y/n was on the couch on her back using Alejandro's thighs as her personal pillow. She opens her eyes hearing the TV all of a sudden get loud, she rolls on her side facing the TV and watched what he was watching.
He placed his big hand on her waist gently rubbing it, and cooing at her.
"I've been thinking-"
"It' never good when you've been thinking."
"Hey now. I'm serious...I was talking with Rudy the other day and him and his wife are...pregnant..." She looks up at him knowing where this might be going. "I was wondering...if you were ever up for it...we can try?"
"Try," she sits up and looks at him. "With me always being tired, you want me to be even more tired?"
"I love you being tired baby, who cares, I'll be taking care of you anyways with our child. You carrying our child, I think...we could do it," he say, cupping her chin and pulling her into a kiss.
"Are we even ready?"
"I feel like a lot of people ask that, we are financially stable, we have a big house, I work a lot, you work a lot, we save our money all the time, I think we are," he tells her.
"Okay, so...when shall we start?"
"Now," he picks her up taking her into the bedroom.
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cozage · 6 months ago
Text
The Moss that Grew in Gloom
Chapter 8: Day Two
Start From Beginning | Next Chapter | Masterlist | Read on AO3
Word Count: 2.4k Characters: female reader x Zoro AN: sorry about the delay on the next chapter! Life has been really busy recently. Hopefully I'll have some more free time and inspiration over the summer! --
The knock on your door came early the next morning. Zoro’s knock. 
You hadn’t been expecting him for at least a few more hours. He liked to sleep in. And yet here he was, knocking on your door. 
“Hey!” Zoro shouted through the thick wood of the door. “Are you awake yet?”
“Come in,” you said gently, putting your book down on the table in front of you. 
He quickly entered at the sound of your voice and gave you a quirky smile. “Told you I’d be early. Let’s get to training.”
“You need to eat first.” You let out a long sigh, then stood to your feet and grabbed Nikko. “We both do. It will be a draining day.”
“What exactly are we doing?” he asked, his eyes flitting to your sword and back to you.
You shook your head slightly. “It’s better to just show you.” You walked out of your room, Zoro trailing behind you. “There’s no way Perona is awake yet, so we’re on our own for breakfast.”
He said nothing more as the two of you walked through the halls, which you were grateful for. You had been awake and ready for the day, but you had expected to have some more quiet time before he came and found you. You wanted more time to prepare, both mentally and emotionally. 
When you got to the kitchen, you pulled out some bread and began to toast it for yourself. You needed something that would stick. Something that wouldn’t make you hungry again for a while. 
“Do you want eggs?” Zoro asked, grabbing a pan from the cupboard. 
“Sure,” you hummed, smiling to yourself. “How many pieces of toast would you like?”
“Five should be good.”
You laughed at that. Of course he could casually eat five pieces of bread and eggs. 
“What’s so funny?” he shot back, which only caused you to laugh harder. 
“Nothing!” you said, taking a breath of air. “I don’t know why I should be shocked that you can eat five pieces of bread and eggs, Roronoa.”
“Breakfast is an important meal! I have to--the energy--eating is very--forget it!”
“How many eggs are you eating, Roronoa?” you teased, turning your head over your shoulder to grin at him. “Ten? Twenty?”
He rolled his eyes at you and ignored your comments, and you turned back to your own pan. Making breakfast with him, so effortlessly joking and teasing along the way, it all almost felt…domestic. The thought was enough to make you stand straighter and ignore him for the rest of the time. 
Once you had a pile of bread and Zoro had finished cooking his mound of eggs, the two of you left the kitchen and sat at the table. You grabbed a few pieces of bread, and then looked at the scrambled eggs with uncertainty. 
“Do you want to get your eggs first? We may have over-prepared for breakfast.” He may have over prepared for breakfast, but you didn’t want to sound accusatory. 
“Get whatever you’d like,” Zoro said. “I’ll take the rest.”
You stifled a smile. “You really do eat ten to twenty eggs, don’t you?”
“Only on training days!” He said, his signature eye twitch starting. 
You could hold back a laugh as you scooped out a helping of eggs onto your plate, and then handed off the pan to him. 
Breakfast was quiet. You were still focused on building the last of your reserves. Zoro seemed to be focused too, but you didn’t have the energy to ask any questions. 
“Can we train at the ruins today?” Zoro scraped the last bit of food off his plate and shoved it into his mouth. 
“The courtyard,” you said shortly. You weren’t supposed to leave the grounds without your father around. 
He didn’t argue, thankfully. You stood and reached for his plate, but he grabbed it himself and stood with you. 
“I can do the dishes,” he offered, holding out his hand to take yours. “You go set up for everything.”
You almost denied him, but you thought better of it. You handed your plate off and went to the courtyard. There wasn’t much to set up today; just two pillows. It would be a long day of sitting still and concentrating. 
He finally arrived, glancing between you and the pillows. 
“Sit,” you commanded, grabbing one of the pillows and sitting down. 
He quietly grabbed the other and sat in front of you just as you had instructed. The two of you were so close. And those storm-gray eyes staring back at you…
You shook your head. You had to focus today, or he’d end up killing you on accident. 
“You’re bad at pushing your haki into inanimate objects,” you said. 
He tried not to look offended by your critique, but you could see his entire body stiffen. “So?”
“We’re going to try having you push your haki into living things. A living thing.” You took a deep breath and gave him a confident smile. “Me.”
His eyes widened slightly. “Is that even possible?”
You gave a nod, holding out your hand. He took it, his calloused hand somehow both warm and clammy. He was nervous. Good. 
You gently squeezed his hand and sent a small burst of energy to it, pushing it from your body into his. 
He gasped as his fingers began to coat themselves in armament haki. 
“It’s difficult,” you admitted. “It takes a lot of skill and focus. If you push too much into someone who is not expecting it, they could die. But if you can master this-”
“No.” Zoro yanked his hand away from your grip. “We’re not doing it.”
“Yes we are. It’s the best way for you to learn control.”
He scowled, standing to his feet. “It’s too dangerous. We’ll find another way for me to learn. I just have to try harder with the stuffed animal.”
“Roronoa, it’s fine.”
“I could hurt you! I could kill-” he couldn’t bring himself to finish that sentence. 
“I’ll be expecting it,” you said softly. “You won’t kill me.”
“I’ll never forgive myself if I do. There has to be another way.”
This was starting to become time consuming. ���Just sit down and try.”
His jaw flexed. “And if you die because of it?”
You gave a dry laugh. “The amount of haki you produce right now won’t kill me.” A lie, but a necessary one. You hadn’t seen haki like his before. That’s why you has spent so long building up energy. 
Your words seemed to calm him down. He trusted your bluff. But he still wasn’t comfortable. 
“We’ll take it slow,” you assured him. “Let’s try it.”
He took a long time to come back and sit down across from you. You could see that this was the last thing he wanted to do, but you continued to give him an encouraging smile as he rejoined you. 
You held your hands out, waiting for him to join yours. You could feel his gaze on you, and your cheeks instinctively pinked. 
“Roronoa.” You kept your gaze on your hands, waiting. Your nerves couldn’t buckle now. 
“Swear it,” he said sharply. “Swear that you know I can’t kill you.”
“You won’t.” Steeling yourself, your eyes darted up to meet his. “I know you won’t kill me.”
“I could hurt you though.” His eyes stayed locked onto yours. 
You nodded. Pain was something you couldn’t lie about. He would feel it when you were connected. “You could. Nothing permanent.”
You felt his calloused hands interlock with yours and your heart skipped a beat. 
“You swear?” His gaze was like an icy wind that sent chills up your spine. 
All you could do was nod. Your voice wouldn’t work. But thankfully, he seemed satisfied with that answer and he closed his eyes.
“Then tell me what to do.”
You explained it once and showed him how it worked a few times, and then let him figure the rest out on his own. 
It took him a long time before he was able to push haki into you, but you never let your guard down. It would be a deadly mistake to underestimate his energy. 
When his haki finally did come, it coursed through your muscles fast, shooting through your fingertips and up into your arms before you could even react to it. Your body seized in pain, and a moment later - before you could even push it out yourself - it was gone. 
So was Zoro. His hands yanked away from yours. You opened your eyes to find him staring at you in a panic. 
“I hurt you!” He snarled. “You said-”
“I said you wouldn’t kill me,” you snapped back. “Don’t pull your hands away like that! If you had left that level of haki in my body and broken the contact, we’d be in a whole different situation!”
“I hurt you,” he repeated. 
“The first time is always the worst,” you said. You couldn’t help the shiver that was sent down your spine at the thought of the pain he had just sent to your body. “You’ll get better.”
“No.”
“Roronoa-”
“No!” His voice was louder and sharper, which caused you to flinch. “You’re hurt. We can’t do this anymore!”
“I am not a child!” you screamed back. “Stop treating me like one! I know what I am capable of, and if I say I can handle this, then I can handle it!”
Zoro seemed to be taken aback by your outburst, but you didn’t care. Your body felt like it had just been electrocuted from his haki invading it and there was a ringing in your ears, but that was the last thing you needed him to know. 
“If you want my help, you’ll get your ass back on the pillow.” You paired your sharp words with a glare that even your father would have been proud of. “Or else you can fight your way off this island yourself.”
He pondered for a moment, and then sat back down across from you. 
“You can do this.” You mumbled it more to yourself than to Zoro, but he nodded in agreement and took your hands again.
Minutes passed by into hours, and you still never felt another jolt of pain like you had earlier. 
“Don’t be a scaredy cat, Roronoa. You’re holding back.”
“I’m going to hurt you again.” His voice came out softer than you expected. 
“Pain is a part of the learning process.”
He growled at your words. “I should be the one in pain, not you.”
“Fine!” You shoved haki into his body, overloading his senses, and then quickly pulled it away before he had time to yelp. “Now you’ve felt the pain I felt! We’re even. So do it again.”
“Bitch,” he muttered under his breath with a chuckle, but you could feel his body relax slightly. 
The second time it happened, there was a warning. A strange tension pushing against you, and then the haki shot into your hands. Painful, but not nearly as bad as the first time it occurred. You felt it begin to retreat, and you hissed out in warning. 
“Keep it steady,” you managed to get out. “You can feel my pain level, so adjust your haki levels until I’m no longer in pain.”
Minutes passed by, with only a small amount of changes in his haki levels as he continued to try and learn. You could feel it creep up your arm and then retreat to your fingertips, but the pain was always there. The prolonged level of pain was starting to make your bones ache, but you kept it at bay with your own reserves. 
“I can’t get it,” he whispered after a long bout of silence. He sounded frustrated and angry. 
“You can,” you encouraged through gritted teeth. “You can do it.”
And so you continued to sit, absorbing the pain he continued to give you until you weren’t sure you could keep going much longer. 
“We should stop,” he said. He was exhausted and defeated, but he hadn’t pulled his haki away from your body yet. 
“A few more minutes,” you whispered, your voice trembling. You were fairly certain there were tears streaming down your cheeks, though you knew he hadn’t seen them yet. “You can do it, Roronoa.”
“It’s Zoro,” he mumbled back quietly, but you felt his concentration focus back to the task at hand. 
And finally, you felt the pain recede. You didn’t have to open your eyes to know that his haki was still coating your hand. 
“Knew you could do it,” you said smugly, a smile dancing across your lips. 
He squeezed your hands and then pulled the haki out of your fingers and back into his body. “I have a good teacher.”
You finally opened your eyes to find the sun setting and your hands back to normal. You two had been at this all day. No wonder you were so exhausted. 
“We should get something to eat,” he said, finally pulling his hands away from yours. 
You quickly wiped your face, hoping he hadn’t seen the tear stains that had gathered there throughout the day. “I think I will just head to bed,” you said softly, giving him the best smile you could muster up. “Today was pretty exhausting.”
His face turned worried and he scanned you over. “What is it?”
“I’m just tired.” All you wanted to do was lay your head down and sleep. Recover.
“Fuck. Can you even stand?”
“Of course I can!”
He crossed his arms, staring at you in a silent challenge. To be honest, you weren’t sure if you could stand. You had planned to curl up on this pillow and fall asleep the moment he walked through the door. But you certainly couldn’t admit that. Not here. Not now. 
So you took a deep breath and willed your body into a standing position. You stood there, stubbornly locking eyes with the man in front of you, waiting for him to wipe that concerned look off his face. 
“Told you.” You tried to hide the labored breaths between words. “I’m fine.”
You took a step towards the castle, eager to get into bed. It was all you wanted. You were so, so tired. 
First your knees buckled. Zoro was there, catching you before your body met the stones. Then, everything went dark. 
---
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napstabl00k · 3 months ago
Text
"I'm in love with you," Whisper had said at somewhere like two in the morning.
Tangle glanced at the clock hung on Jewel's dining room wall, reading out a happy little 8:27. A good time for breakfast, in Tangle's book.
She had this uncanny habit of waking up at 7 on the dot, or, at worst, three minutes later, and always crawled out of bed for a morning jog. This morning was no different, despite the absolutely atrocious 3 in the morning at which she'd fallen asleep. Four hours was a terrible amount of sleep to get. But naps didn't agree with her an hour after a morning run, so yogurt and oatmeal for breakfast with a heap of boredom on top it was.
Any other day, Jewel would have been awake. Any other day, she would have been down at the museum, even, getting ready to open at 9:00.
Today, Jewel was getting a hard earned ten hours of sleep, and was not going to work.
And Whisper- well, Whisper had this strange ability to fall in and out of sleep until she was either roused by some outside force or-
Well, really, just roused by some outside force. Presumably it was some tactic from when she was out on the battlefield, to be able to wake up at any sign of danger. Right now, when curled under Jewel's spare blanket, it meant that either her Wisps were gonna wake her, or Tangle was gonna do it herself.
And Whisper deserved those ten hours as much as Jewel did.
"So do I," Tangle admitted to herself, glancing back up at the clock.
8:31
"Ughhhhhh," Tangle whined, smacking her head against Jewel's dining table. "I wish I was asleep too... I bet everyone's sleeping right now."
The party had gone long into the night, and everyone was almost certainly catching up on some much needed z's. Her jog had told her that most stores were closed till an easier to deal with 10 in the morning, though she admittedly didn't feel like leaving her best friend and Whisper behind to go make a ruckus.
Speaking of Whisper.
"I'm in love with you."
Tangle covered her head with her hands. She kicked her feet, just for some way to get all this flustered energy out.
Part of her was happy. Beyond happy, even. She'd been waiting for this for months. Before the virus started, probably. It might've been wishful thinking back then, though.
Tangle would allow herself to admit that she was a little bit stupid. She didn't really get the big words that mechanics and the, like, smart people on those adventure teams she participated in sometimes would say. Plans jumbled in her brain at a certain point, so sometimes she had to make stuff up on the fly, and sometimes explanations went waaayyyy over her head.
But she figured she was pretty smart on one thing.
Emotions came pretty easy to her. Her emotions, for sure, but other's too. They just sort of clicked in her brain.
Love was a weird one, sure. But she lived in a town where she knew everyone and everyone knew her, and it'd been that way since she could remember. She had a lot of time to gather what love looked like as gossip flooded from ear to ear. That's the thing about a town like Spiral Hill. No one's business is really private.
There'd been a little tickle in the back of Tangle's head when Whisper had shown her her mask. She hadn't paid attention to it, then, too preoccupied by the issue at hand. But it had stuck with her, and she'd sorted through it in daydreams and in the minutes between her head hitting the pillow and sleep taking her.
It was the trust that came too easily to a creature like Whisper. Tangle had seen it before, in kids, teens, adults that fell in love. She'd asked Jewel's auntie, once, curious.
"Why do they act so dumb around them?" She'd said, with her little baby lemur voice.
Jewel's auntie, who Tangle had believed to be the smartest woman on earth, then - because she hadn't yet seen her fully put her foot in her mouth when trying to talk to people with any sort of power over her - had glanced out from the balcony the three of them sat on, at the subject of Tangle's curiosities.
"Love makes you trust a little too easily. Consider why someone is the way they are a little less. And you're putty in the hands of someone you trust too much." She'd sounded melancholy, then. A bit sad. A bit thoughtful.
The answer had felt wrong to Tangle's little brain, and years later it caught up that Jewel's aunt had just been cheated on by her boyfriend. But the answer had stuck just as well, and had applied itself to Whisper in a moment of realization.
It probably didn't mean anything on its own, really. But it was a seed that built with every interaction they had, and eventually Tangle thought, with a pretty heavy vote of confidence, that Whisper might be in love with her.
Which was great, because, as Tangle had realized pretty early on, she was in love with Whisper too.
So it was hard to wait, to swallow every time she wanted to blurt it out (because Tangle, for all her talents, was not very good at shutting up), to wait until Whisper knew, to wait until Whisper was comfortable.
Boundaries. That was one of the first things she and Whisper had talked about, when friends was only something you could sort of call them. It had been weird, at first, when hugs were instinctual. And then it got easier with practice. And then Whisper was willing to take her hand, and told her that hand holding was fine. And there was this give and take with them, where some were alright, and others got put up, and Tangle understood.
Really, she did. Whisper had a lot going on, and a romance might not have been in the cards for her. Not for a while. Maybe not ever.
So Tangle sucked in a breath, and waited for Whisper to tell her on her own. She could simmer knowing already in the meantime.
Tangle tapped her foot against the ground. She didn't like daydreaming about all this past stuff like this. Especially not the obvious next bit.
But Whisper had held her like they were both going to die, back on Angel Island, when Tangle had woken up. And there hadn't been much time between her waking up and everyone trying to get back into the swing of normalcy.
Whisper had spent the time all but attached to her tail.
She'd missed her with a desperation, Tangle found. One she didn't understand, but Whisper's face, as monotone as she kept it, turned to her with relief, often. She allowed arms over her shoulder (truly the only way Tangle knew how to flirt, so that was nice,) with the need of someone who felt that Tangle would disappear if she went too far.
She'd grabbed a drink (almost definitely alcoholic, which neither of them were old enough to have legally), downed it like a shot, turned to Tangle, and immediately got interrupted by Eggman crashing in.
Tangle had known, then, what Whisper was going to say, but she wasn't going to say it in this mess, so out with Eggman!
The fight wasn't even that bad, other than the fact that the town square was a little bit busted. Sonic showed up, Eggman turned tail, and Whisper huffed a little bit.
Tangle turned to look at Whisper, later that night, or earlier that morning, and asked her what she'd wanted to say.
Whisper, heavy with sleep:
"I'm in love with you."
And with the excitement came a fear.
Because Whisper was latching onto her as someone who'd risen from the dead. Whisper was latching onto her as someone she'd failed. Whisper was latching onto her with regrets.
And Tangle didn't really know what to do with that.
They could get through it, sure, but Tangle had a saying about it, and it had been running through her head for the past couple days:
It'll pass, sure, but it sucks right now.
"Tangle, if you wanted to sleep more, you could have- you know, slept more."
Tangle lifted her head. Jewel was standing in the bedroom's doorway in her pajamas, Whisper standing at her side in Tangle's biggest tanktop, groggy.
"I wasn't sleeping!" Tangle defended. "Just. Thinking."
Jewel snorted. "Don't hurt yourself." She paused. Covered her mouth. "Sorry. Still waking up."
"I think it's funny," Tangle reassured.
Jewel sighed, then, fond. "I know."
And then she went over to the kitchen and pulled out a can of instant coffee.
Whisper trudged over to the table and placed her head on the table, letting her hair act as a curtain to the light streaming in from the windows. Tangle watched, head resting on her hand.
"Hey, Whisper, girl, uh... Can we talk?"
Whisper hummed a note that might be affirmative.
"'Bout last night. Or, I mean, this morning. Earlier. Y'know."
Whisper lifted her head, pulling her hair out of her face, and placed her head back down, on top of her arms this time.
"Were happy, then," Whisper said, quieter than Tangle's ever heard her.
"I am," Tangle admitted, and her tail began swishing against her will.
In the corner of her eye, Jewel turned.
"Then?" Whisper asked.
"I love you too," Tangle said, it falling out with some kind of weight in her chest she'd been ignoring. "Me too."
Jewel, in the corner of her eye, was leaning against the kitchenette counter.
Whisper's lips curled up, and Tangle watched her press her hands against her snout to hide it.
"But, what now?"
Whisper tilted her head, confused.
"Do we, like. Date? I've never done this before, Whisper!" Tangle pressed the balls of her hands into her eyes.
"Me neither," Whisper admitted softly.
"Then?"
"Don't want to change," Whisper explained. "The same. Us."
"Then, what are we?"
Whisper frowned. "Us?"
"Us. Is that- does that count?"
Tangle turned to her best friend, who was already waving her hands in front of her. "Don't look at me!!"
"Can we do that?" Tangle asked.
"Don't know," Whisper said, almost to herself. "Just, wanted you to know."
That had been what she'd been afraid of, a little bit, Tangle recognized. Whisper was tackling regrets. Not telling Tangle that she loved her was one of them. And now that Tangle knew, she didn't need anything more.
Did Tangle?
It was a strange question. She thought it over for a minute, wondering what, really, dating brought new to the table for them.
Nothing, really, that she could imagine. She could ask to kiss Whisper now, probably, but did they need to be dating for that? She would have asked then anyway if Jewel didn't look extremely awkward, standing to the side, glancing between her mug and her friends.
"What would change anyway?" Tangle asked, finally. "Can't think of much."
Whisper smiled, a small thing. "Then?"
"I like the way you said it. Just us. Doesn't matter if we're not dating." Tangle grinned, big, big enough for the both of them.
"Is- um, are you two good?" Jewel asked. "I feel- I feel I shouldn't have been there for all that."
"It's your apartment," Tangle said.
"I'm sorry," Whisper added for the both of them.
"It's fine! Just- that should have been private, I feel. I didn't need to- Shouldn't have, really, um, been here."
"Of course you should have!" Tangle said easily. "Speakin' of, make your coffee- I already ate, but you should too."
The kitchen sort of settled into something steady, then - Whisper and Jewel hovering about, trying to fill their stomachs. They bring plates back, two different kinds of breakfasts, neither matching Tangle's finished one.
It really did feel normal, Tangle found. Like nothing had changed between them, but the weight of a secret was pulled off of her shoulders.
Well, maybe one thing could change, actually.
"Whisper, what do you think of kissing?"
Jewel nearly spat out her coffee.
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thewintersoldierdisaster · 2 years ago
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a/n: i was mostly inspired by david perron’s insta post which is the bottom left pic! i thought it was cute and something andrei would do so here we go. i have one more dad!drei idea that i'm gonna work on and then moving to some different prompts that you guys have sent in and some smutty stuff too! since it worked so well last time, i’m posting this before i go to the isles/flyers game, give me all the positive energy!!
word count: 2.2k
tw: none
summary: andrei gets a hat trick and surprises you and the kids
It’s late when Andrei finally gets home and you wake up briefly when you hear the shower turn on. Andrei’s quick, climbing into bed with wet hair just a few minutes after he started his shower. You yawn, eyes closed, and turn towards him, scooting across the mattress to curl up against him.
“Hi,” you mumble, brushing your nose against the collar of his white undershirt. He smells like soap and Andrei, with a faint hint of airport. You’re half-asleep and still your body reacts to him, the familiar desire warming between your legs.
“Hi,” he replies into your hair, one hand sliding around your back and resting in between your shoulder blades and the other resting on the small swell of your stomach. He taps lightly against the bump and he can’t feel it, but you feel the faint flutter of the baby moving around.
You relax completely in his arms, slipping your leg in between his. “How was the game? I fell asleep,” you laugh quietly, apologetically. Between running after three energetic little girls and growing a fourth child, you’re basically permanently exhausted these days. Once Evie had fallen asleep at 8:30, you’d wiped down the kitchen and crawled into bed yourself, barely catching a minute of the game.
Andrei huffs a small laugh and says, “it was good. Sat in the box for a bit.” His hand rubs slow, lazy circles on your upper back and it’s so warm in his embrace.
“Of course,” you smile to yourself. “My little criminal, leading the team in penalty minutes. I couldn’t be more proud.” You’re fading fast and fall back asleep before Andrei can even respond.
When you wake up for real at your usual time in the morning, there’s a steaming mug of peppermint tea on the bedside table and a tiny foot pressed against the side of your thigh. You roll over and spot Kira, horizontal across the bed and letting out soft little baby snores. Her hair is a messy halo around her face and she’s got the corner of her blankie clutched in one hand. Two months shy of her second birthday, your youngest daughter must’ve woken up at some point after Andrei got home. She’s usually pretty good about soothing herself back to sleep, but he must’ve wanted to get in some extra cuddles and brought her back to your bed. You’re honestly a little surprised that you didn’t wake up through any of the movement.
Carefully climbing out of bed, you leave Kira in the middle of the mattress, piling pillows around her to prevent her from rolling even though you know from experience that once this kid is out, she’s out and not moving. You brush your teeth quickly and wash your face, feeling more awake as you pull on a sweater and leggings. It’s cool for late-March and you’re grateful for the warm mug of tea wrapped in your hands as you pad down the stairs in your Ugg slippers.
“Morning, Drei,” you murmur quietly, sliding up behind your husband.
Andrei looks up from the island counter, a weird expression on his face. It’s a mix of shifty and excited and your eyebrows draw together, “what’s going on?”
“You really didn’t watch any of the game?” He asks, a curious lift in his tone. You shake your head, distracted by how horny his accent is making you. Despite your exhaustion, the second trimester hormones are keeping you in a constant state of desire for your husband.
“No,” you sip at the tea, trying to look around the bulk of his frame to see what’s on the counter. “I passed out and slept until you came home.”
He grins proudly, stepping to the side and showing off the three pucks piled on the counter. “Missed another hat trick,” he announces, gesturing like a game show host.
You’re surprised and delighted, beaming back at Andrei, “oh my god! I can’t believe I missed it.” You set your mug on the counter and step into Andrei’s personal space to give him a kiss. Your hands curl in the fabric of his t-shirt and his hands land on your waist, pulling you close. “I’m so proud of you,” you whisper against his lips. It’s not the first hat trick of his career or even of the season, but it never gets old.
“Thank you, solnyshka,” he replies, the tips of his ear flushing pink. “One puck per kid.”
When you pull back, you notice that there are three pieces of paper spread out on the counter. Each paper has one of the girls’ names on it and Andrei unstacks the pucks, setting a piece of paper in front of each one.
“Thought it might be a fun surprise,” he shrugs.
You kiss the corner of his mouth, feeling his lips tilt up in a smile. “They’re going to love it! Or well, the big two will. Kiry is just going to be happy to have you home.” The toddler is obsessed with Andrei and who can blame her? You’ve created a little pack of daddy’s girls, helped, probably, by the fact that Andrei is like a giant kid himself sometimes.
“I’m glad we have a little home stand,” Andrei says, leaning back against the counter and keeping you close with his arms wrapped loosely around your waist. “I’ve missed you and the girls.”
“We missed you too,” you reply softly, resting your palms against his chest. “How about I go get the girls up? You can surprise them.”
He nods and you traipse back up the stairs to get the girls awake. Evie grumbles for a minute, but wakes up easily, already chattering by the time you’re down the hall in Alina’s room. The four and a half year old is less amenable to waking up and howls like a wild cat when you nudge her. At the promise of a surprise though, she’s awake and skeptically following along. It’s like the Pied Piper in your house, a little parade as you lift Kira from your bed and head downstairs. Kira’s face is tucked in your neck, her warm baby breath tickling your skin. You rub her back in soft circles and she wakes up slowly, jolting when her big sisters spot Andrei and shriek, “Daddy!” before running into his arms. He squats down and catches them in his arms, lifting them and kissing their cheeks.
“My girls!” He exclaims, smiling widely. “I’ve missed you.”
Alina pats his cheeks, “too scratchy, I don’t like.”
You and Andrei both laugh at her blunt honestly. “Sorry, Alya. Daddy will shave,” he promises and you frown a little. You like the beard and especially how it feels against your skin.
“We missed you, Daddy,” Evie says, cuddling close. “Mommy had to kill a spider and it was funny because she screamed. And she and Aunt Nykki took us all to see the Easter Bunny because Easter is soon, did you know that? But she said we can see the Bunny again if you want to come. And we played with Gigi and can we get a puppy, Daddy? Mommy said that she already wipes too many butts to add a puppy but I think it would be fun. Also, I FaceTimed Baba and Dedu and Uncle Geno. And Uncle Geno said that I should tell you that he’s the bestest.”
You giggle at the way Andrei’s eyes widen when Evie barely takes a breath as she fills him in on the last few days. “Evie, honey, take a breath,” you laugh. “Daddy can’t listen that fast.”
She whips her head around, hitting Andrei in the face with the end of a messy blonde pigtail. “But I gotta tell him everything before he leaves again!” She yelps, looking at you with big brown eyes full of urgency. Andrei’s smile fades slightly, but he rallies, jiggling them in his arms.
“I’m not leaving for a bit,” he promises, drawing Evie’s attention back. “I’ll be home through Easter, zaychik. And then I’m only gone for a few days and I’ll be back.”.
“Did you bring us a s’pise?” Alina asks, knowing Andrei usually comes back from games with a little toy or a book or something fun.
Grateful for the change in subject and speaking quickly so Evie can’t interject, Andrei grins, “I did. Take a look.” He turns so the girls can see the three puck with their names underneath. “Your papa got another hat trick last night.”
You can hear the pride in his tone and your smile is a little watery with emotion. Kira, awake now, points at a puck and shouts, “mine!” She wiggles out of your arms and toddles to the counter, reaching up as far as her little arms will allow.
“Is that how many goals you scored?” Evie asks, reaching for her puck from Andrei’s arms. She hands Alina one too and Alina runs her fingers over the black rubber.
Andrei nods. “Exactly, one goal for each of my daughters.”
He sets Alina and Evie down so they’re sitting on the counter and picks up Kira so she can reach for her own puck, immediately trying to put it in her mouth. “Oh, ugh, no!” you yelp, reaching forward at the same time as Andrei, to pull the puck from her mouth. “That’s so yucky, Kiry. The puck is disgusting.”
Kira starts crying and shouting, “mine! Mine! Want it!”
Alina looks up blithely and comments, “I think she wantsta eat the puck, Mama.”
“Thank you, Alya,” you mutter. “I didn’t realize that.”
Andrei presses his lips together to smother a snort of laughter and manages to choke a little, coughing and laughing at the same time. You shoot him an amused look and clap your hands together, trying to distract Kira from her hiccuping sobs. “How about breakfast? Should Mama make pancakes? With sprinkles?”
The girls cheer, but Andrei interrupts, “I handled that too. Breakfast, I mean.” He tips his chin towards the counter next to the fridge where, you’re noticing for the first time, a big white bakery box sits. The name of your favorite bakery is stamped on the side and you gasp a little in excitement.
“Oh my god, best husband ever!” You cheer, darting for the box and kissing Andrei’s cheek in a drive-by. The cinnamon buns from this bakery have been a major craving for you, so you’re thrilled to see a giant one covered in cream cheese frosting settled smack in the middle of the box. You swipe a finger through the frosting and sample it before taking the other pastries out of the box and settling them on plates for everyone.
Andrei laughs at your enthusiasm and starts pulling apart a blueberry muffin and feeding Kira small pieces. The older girls dive into their croissants, crumbs flying everywhere as they giggle about getting to eat while sitting on the counter. Alina and Evie slide their pucks around, hitting them against each other like bumper cars and you lean your hip against the counter while you watch them.
“You know,” you comment slyly, your hand sliding over the bump of your stomach, “once this little one gets here, you’re going to have to start scoring four goals a night.”
Andrei snorts, smiling with his dimple, and holds his palm out for Kira to pick at pieces of muffin. “I think I can manage that at least once,” he says. “I should probably start shooting at the net more though, if I want to get up to four or more goals a game.”
“Four or more?” You yelp, choking on your bite of cinnamon roll. You cough, catching your breath and glaring at him. “You think I would okay a fifth kid? Am I crazy?”
“Crazy for me,” Andrei deadpans, mild disgust crossing his features when Kira decides she’s done with her muffin and spits a half-chewed bite back into his hand. He wipes his hand on a napkin and tickles Kira’s side, earning toddler giggles.
Evie tugs on your sleeve and as soon as she has you attention, she launches into another monologue, “Mommy, can we see Uncle Marty and Aunt Nykki and everyone today and see the Bunny again with Daddy? Because I think Daddy would like the Bunny since we do the hops the same and also Daddy calls me zaychik which is Russian for bunny, did you know that?”
You laugh, so in love with your chatty little girl. “I did know that zaychik means bunny, or really little rabbit. And I’ll text Aunt Nykki to see if she and the kids can hang out. But no more sugar for you, okay?”
Both girls clutch their chocolate croissants close, clearly afraid you’ll take their pastries right away, and Andrei laughs at the reaction. He curls his hand over your hip and teases you, “they’re like you, when you don’t want to share your fries with me, solnyshka.”
“I am growing your fourth child, Mister Svechnikov,” you poke his chest with your index finger. “I deserve those fries!”
He grabs your hand and kisses the tip of your index finger, ducking his head and looking up at you from underneath those long eyelashes. He smiles at you, charming and boyish, and if you weren’t already pregnant, that look alone would do the trick.
Maybe a fifth child isn’t entirely off the table.
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mirisss · 2 years ago
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Chapter 6
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Wordcount ≈ 3.4k
Warnings: Anxiety, panic-attack, trauma, self-doubt, let me know if I should add anything else,
Taglist: @ayoo-bangtan, @lose-lose07, @kingcarrot-thecarrotking, @starjane312, @reighlee-greaves​, @hi-39024,@queenmea604, @septicrebel, @justayoungandwisefangirl
Please reblog! 
Requests are open!
That night, (Y/n) dreamt of how tomorrow would be. The company. The thought was a bit frightening but also exciting, to see how her family worked. She wanted to see it, she wanted to know what they did, after spending some time with 3racha she was curious about the others. Tomorrow will be a good day, it has to be. 
Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9
(Y/n)’s POV
*RRRRIIIINNNGGGG*
The first thing I heard as I began waking from my deep slumber was the melodic ringing of Minho’s alarm. Though, Minho himself did not seem to hear it as his breathing was just as slow and steady as earlier during the night. I woke up once during the night because I had ended up kicking away my comforter and feeling cold. I stretched in my bed still lying down before I sat up rubbing my eyes to try and rub the sleepiness away. Which did, in fact, not work. I stretched one more time before standing up and quietly walked over to the bed in which Minho was sleeping, the alarm still ringing from his phone on the bedside table. He must have been really tired if he didn’t notice the loud alarm that had been ringing for about 5 minutes. I looked at the phone and turned the alarm off then I looked over at the dancer who seemed very peaceful. I gently shook him a little, “Minho, Minho, you need to wake up, it’s 5.38 am,” I heard some commotion outside the door to Minho’s room meaning at least two others were awake. Finally, after me shaking him for a bit and trying to talk him awake he responded. “Hmm, oh, yeah, huh? oh, (Y/n), I’ll get up,” Once I saw that he was actually awake I stepped away from the bed and made my way over to Jeongin’s room as he was mostly in charge of my clothes as the group's fashionista, also he was surprisingly the only one with room for more clothes in his closet. 
Just before leaving Minho, I looked behind me to make sure he was actually getting up, which he was. “I’ll go get ready, are you making breakfast today as well?” “Huh? Oh, uh, no. Days like these we usually eat at the company at around 8-9, Chan-hyung and Binnie sometimes make a protein shake or something like that but the rest of us usually eat later, why? Do you want me to make something?” “No, it’s fine. I’m not hungry, I was more asking in case you needed the help,” Minho gave me a cute smile, “That’s very sweet of you, but you should save that spirit for the company. We have a busy day ahead of us,” I nodded, and then I hurried out to find I.N. 
As I opened the door from Minho’s bedroom I was met with the mess that is Stray Kids in the morning. First I saw Chan with a dumbbell in one hand and a glass full of some pink-brownish liquid - probably one of those protein smoothies shakes Minho told me about. He noticed me and gave me a smile before continuing with his breakfast-work out whatever he was doing. I turned my head and was met with a yawning Seungmin who was about to walk into me as he had his eyes closed while yawning. “Woah, sorry (Y/n). Didn’t - uh - see you there, I haven't fully woken up yet,” “It’s okay, just be careful. You could hurt yourself,” I tried smiling at him full of energy, but even I was struggling to stay awake. For the first time in my life I can sleep without worry and to be honest, it is the best sleep I have ever experienced, I hope to always have these kinds of slumbers. After giving me a quick little nod he continued his path toward the kitchen, probably. And I continued on my way to Jeongin. 
“Morning bunny!” “Good morning Felix!” “(Y/n), did you sleep well?” “Yes, I slept very well! How about you Hyunjin?” “That’s good! Yes, I did. You on your way to Innie?” “Yes, I need to look good for my first day working, right?” Hyunjin laughed as I said that. “You always look good, and I’m sure Innie will have something nice thought out for you,” I nodded my head before walking a little further. I passed by Han’s door and I could hear him rushing around inside, I decided I would say good morning later as he was busy now. Finally, right before I came to Innie’s room, I ran into Changbin, or rather, Changbin ran into me. “Holy, woah, OMG I’M SO SORRY (Y/n), I didn’t mean to bump into you. Are you okay?” Changbin looked over me as if a car had run over me. It made it even worse when I flinched at his raised voice. I knew that neither Changbin nor any other members would ever hurt me, but it was a reflex to flinch away from someone with a raised voice. “I promise, I’m okay,” Different from the previous morning greetings the last minutes my voice now only came out as a whisper, I wanted to be confident, I wanted to stop being scared of everyone, I wanted to be normal. But I can’t. Not now and perhaps maybe never. I saw the worry swirling inside Changbin’s eyes, I saw how he wanted to go back in time and change everything. I just shook my head, I have to come past this weakness, maybe if I wasn’t coddled after something happened, I would grow stronger. I walked passed Binnie until I reached Jeongin’s room. The door was ajar so I lightly pushed it open, I found Innie inside the room holding some of the clothes they had bought for me the day before. 
“Good morning Jeongin,” I.N turned his head so quickly I thought he would end up with whiplash, he raised his hands one at a time holding the shirts in front of him, probably imagining the clothes on me. He was tilting his head and he didn’t seem to be able to pick one over the other. “Hm, morning sweetie,” My heart skipped a beat as the nickname fell out of his mouth so smoothly. “Are we feeling cream white or soft pink? Hmm, both are cute… Bunny, do you know how cold it is outside?” “Um, no sorry,” “No worries, let me check on my phone” Innie laid the shirts down on his bed with a couple of pants and skirts and whatnot before checking his phone. “Hm, it is not too cold outside and we’re going to be inside mostly but you might get cold in the dance studio… Hmm, the cream hoodie it is… Okay, let’s get you dressed. We’re kind of in a hurry,” He gave me his signature smile which in turn made me smile, I had calmed down from the incident with Changbin, I hope he isn’t feeling too bad about it. I’m just being silly… Right? I’m just silly. I tried to shake away that feeling and calm down, I knew that I was a little tense about today. I’m going to meet a lot of new people and I might get overwhelmed but I’m supposed to be there for the boys so that can’t happen. What if they don’t want to keep me if I can’t keep it together? They wouldn’t abandon me, would they? My pulse was rising at an alarming rate, my breathing was erratic, and I began seeing how Stray Kids would abandon me if I didn’t meet their expectations. I would lose my one true home. 
I was brought back to reality by Jeongin who had enveloped me in a gentle hug, I could hear him lowly whispering my name and that it would be okay. I noticed that we were no longer standing up but rather sitting on the floor. I wasn’t sure how we ended up on the floor but here we were. “(Y/n), it’s okay. Don’t worry, everything will be fine. (Y/n), darling, please calm down, you need to breathe, okay? Just take a deep breath,” I wanted to answer but I couldn’t, I tried taking a deep breath but it was futile, I could barely tell if I was breathing. “Breathe with me, baby. Everything is okay, you’re alright.” I.N continued trying to calm me down which eventually worked after a couple of tries I managed to take a couple of deep breaths and I could finally respond. “Thank you,” I was barely audible but Innie had heard me. “(Y/n), what happened? Did I do something to trigger you? Did something happen earlier?” Jeongin was gently stroking my head, an act which was very soothing for my panicking mind. “I’m just being silly. I’m sorry. We’re going to be late because of me,” “Hey, bunny. No, don’t say you’re being silly. I know we don’t know your entire story but we understand that you have been through a lot and that certain days are going to be difficult, and we are never going to blame you for these things. So please don’t shut us out, talk with us, with me, when something is bothering you or making you worry no matter what it is,” I shifted away from him a tiny bit just to see his face but not enough for him to stop touching my hair. Jeongin was looking at me with such sincerity and what I want to say was love. “I just, can’t help but think of all the ways I will let you guys down and when that happens you’ll abandon me like everyone else,” Jeongin’s eyes swarmed with even more adoration and sadness after I said that. “(Y/n), if we were like that, that we kick people out for not being perfect then none of us would be here. I definitely wouldn’t be here, I was struggling so much in the beginning, I had no confidence and I almost gave up. I wanted so badly to be an idol but so many people told me that I would never be able to reach that dream because I didn’t have any talent and I believed them. When I first joined SKZ I was a mess, I tried to act like I knew everything even though I didn’t because I didn’t want the others to tell me I was bad. But once I finally opened up to them they helped me become better, they accepted me for who I was flaws and all and they helped me grow into the idol I am today. We all have our own stories and our own pasts. Do you want to know one of the reasons why we named our team ‘Stray Kids’?” I was so close to crying hearing Jeongin tell me his story or at least part of it. I couldn’t say anything so I simply answered with a barely noticeable nod. “All of us come from different pasts and when we found each other we felt lost like we didn’t belong anywhere, we were Stray kids, kids with no home but we found a home in each other. All of us together make a whole, we care so much for each other no matter the flaws or pasts we have. And the same goes for you, we care so so so much about you, and your past, what you have been through is not your fault, and we would never kick you out. You’re one of us now, a Stray Kid, and that, that’s forever” By now I was full-on crying. The day had barely begun and I was already a mess. Jeongin continued to lovingly stroke my hair, I noticed how the pattern of his breaths had changed signalling that he too felt emotional after sharing his story with me. I slightly shifted my position on the floor once again so that my torso and chest were facing Jeongin’s front, then I laid my arms around him ever so carefully and gave him a hug. My hands naturally found the pace at which he was stroking my hair so that I could match it with the pace I was stroking his back. We sat like that for about 3 minutes before we calmed down and stopped crying and whatnot.
I once again realized that these eight boys are my home, my forever home, my last home. I have many demons that will haunt me for the rest of my life, my past isn’t easy and I know that it will be difficult to move forward with this heavy baggage holding me back, but ever so slightly day by day with these guys, it gets a little easier. Step by step. I will reach the light, and I will stay there, with them. It will take time, but that’s okay. With them, I’m safe. With them, I have found happiness. We all have our struggles, I will try to stop being ashamed of my past and start opening up, bit by bit, just like they are. 
Reluctantly, as I didn’t really want to leave his arms yet, I pushed myself away from Jeongin’s embrace. “We need to hurry, we should have been ready like 5 minutes ago,” I could only muster up a nervous smile as I was now thinking about how the rest of the day would be once we reached the company. I.N gave me a nod and a reassuring smile before he stood up and held me up too. He handed me the outfit he had picked out and then left the room to give me privacy so that I could change into it. I changed so quickly that I almost thought I had turned into the Flash or something. Once I came out of I.N’s room I couldn’t see any of the boys around but I heard their voices coming from the hallway so I jogged there. As I turned the corner into the entry hallway I found all eight boys fully dressed and ready to go. “Sorry, that I’m late,” “Don’t worry about it (Y/n), we still have plenty of time to get there. We’re actually ready earlier than most days,” Even though I could hear the wavering of Chan’s voice, revealing that he was lying, I felt relieved that they would tell a white lie to reassure me this time. I needed that to know that they didn’t blame me, to know that they weren’t angry. I noticed that Binnie looked a bit sad though, I guessed that he was still feeling bad about our interaction a little earlier. I wasn’t ready to talk about it but I didn’t want him to feel bad about it so I hoped I could relieve him some other way. As we left the apartment I found my chance. I walked with haste in my steps to catch up with Changbin and once I reached him I grabbed a hold of one of his hands, this caused him to stop dead in his tracks. He was looking at our interlocked hands before he looked up and met my eyes. I smiled at him before I began walking again, lightly tugging his hand that I kept intertwined with my own. Even though I wasn’t looking at him I could tell he was smiling once again. His aura and his vibe had turned happy again.  We got in the two cars and drove to the company. The entire ride I was just sitting there taking it all in, completely quiet as I listened to the hyung line speaking, still holding Changbin’s hand as a form of comfort for both him and myself. Trying to prepare myself for what is to come. 
~At the company ~
Third person POV
Once the group finally arrived at the company the boys all let deep sighs in some form of preparation. (Y/n) nervously looked out of the window toward the tall building, from one perspective it looked quite inviting as if inside that building there was a whole new world, from another perspective it looked like something from a horror movie, at least in (Y/n)’s opinion. (Y/n) knew that it wouldn’t be easy, not now and probably not in the future either however it would get easier as she gets used to it. With shaky steps and a worried frown, (Y/n) got out of the car following the SKZ members toward the entrance of the building. The second they got inside the building (Y/n) was hit with a tsunami wave of stimulus, so many sounds, scents, lights, and people. It was overwhelming, the hybrids knees almost gave out under her. However, the second she began to waver Bang Chan was at her side and he lightly put an arm around her waist - barely touching her but he used enough contact for her to know he was there. The touch was very welcomed, it helped ground (Y/n) and remind her that she is safe because they are there with her. (Y/n) shook her head in order to shake away the anxiety, or at least attempt to. “Are you okay?” Bang Chan whispered the question so that only (Y/n) would hear it. “I think so, thank you,” “No worries, we- I am here for you,” Chan began removing his arm from around her but (Y/n) wasn’t quite ready to leave the safety of his embrace but she did understand that it might not be practical for him to walk around like that so she settled for a better solution. As soon as his hand was back by his side (Y/n) took hold of it. She shyly looked up at him hoping that he would say it was okay to do this. Chan looked back at her with a happy and bright smile and then a little nod. “Okay, let’s go, everyone. First on today’s list is a meeting regarding our next comeback, Changbin, Han and I have been working on a couple of songs but we have a lot to discuss with you guys too. After that, we have another meeting regarding some variety show appearance or something like that. Then we have breakfast time, and after that, we have a couple of hours to work on whatever we want so 3racha will be working on songs and the rest of you will either be there with us or doing your own things. That’s pretty much the plan for today,” Bang Chan said before he began walking, slightly pulling (Y/n) with him by their connected hands. 
After a couple of minutes, the group came to the meeting room. (Y/n) froze in front of the door, worried once again about what would happen. This time though, she wasn’t shaking. Han walked up to her and tapped her shoulder, (Y/n) turned her head in his direction trying to appear calm but Han saw how stressed her eyes were. How could he not? He knew exactly was she was feeling, Han himself has struggled with anxiety for many years so he saw a bit of himself in the bunny. “Hey, you’ll be okay. I know it seems very scary but you will be okay, we are here, and we won’t leave you alone, not for a single second. You can hold my hand if you want to, for the entire day, you can hold onto me, I won’t push you away, I will be here if you need to find comfort in someone, okay? And, if anyone is mean to you, we’ll tell Chan-hyung and he’ll take care of it. That person won’t ever be mean to you again after that, so you will be okay. We will be okay together,” He finished with a convincing smile, (Y/n) couldn’t help but smile back at him because he was speaking so seriously yet doing silly faces, all to help make (Y/n) feel safe. Maybe it won’t be as bad as I thought. I have them after all. Come at me world, I’m not alone anymore, I have a family that will protect me now. So give me your worst, I will be able to handle it as long as I have them. 
~ To be continued ~ 
Thank you for reading, please like and reblog! 
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poupeesdecirque · 6 months ago
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General Update
Just a heads up, I mainly write for those who got snippets the last days and are maybe (quite) concerned and worried about me.
So, the last few weeks at work have been literal hell.
More under the cut, this gets long.
This week especially, we worked with 6 people understaffed (out of 16, might be not that bad if you work in an office but if you work with humans, especially children/toddlers even it's... difficult), I won't get much into detail but weeks we have the bi-weekly meeting mondays before work mess me up already but then 3 more people calling in sick made everything worse. It didn't help that my annual employee-feedback talk was coming up on wednesday and that turns me into a pile of anxiety of its own.
The tuesday in before had me crying in the bathroom at work after just 1,5 hours of a 8+ hour day without real lunch break (just fyi last summer I went down with hours to be less stressed... I got in more than two days worth of work in overtime the last month). I work there for 10 years and this is the 2nd time I cried and this time it was just because of the pure stress. I won't go into detail here but I went beyond my limit so often the last weeks I am merely a shell and just do creative things to cope somehow.
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The annual talk went .... good. No, good is an understatement, it was one of the best I had, there is basically zero critique on how I work, boss is very satisfied and the only thing is that I am told to tell my coworkers when their decisions stress me. haha. yeah.
Then there is our street... it's a construction site since February but now the whole thing is closed down, last week I almost didn't manage to get to work bc they closed down another road and I had no way to get through left q_q...
The work week was just 3 days (luckily) and we went into a long weekend bc of the public holiday. I decided to take the thursday slow but, yeah I know it better, the point here is when you go from 200% to maybe 10% your mind will crash and that's what I got.
I am so under stress my body has no idea where to put it and tries everything, I can't sleep well, just for a few hours and then I am wide awake.
Aside that I am basically done with the redraw project which took me almost a year, then my fic 'Warmth' is done too, it's just one final scene and that's the epilogue with the final conclusion, I have been working on this for 2,5 years now and it's part of my evening routine.. the redraws are part of my morning routine... I changed a few more things and well I managed to mess up my entire routine but I NEED IT TO FUNCTION.
I felt it coming but well.. you guessed it right, depression hit me hard on friday evening (I have seasonal depression, it gets worse the longer the days become, higher temperatures are often enough to trigger it, then the lack of sleep, two big projects ending, etc) and yesterday before the con I didn't even want to go there despite the Con being the only thing keeping me going the whole week.
I'm exhausted, tired but sleeping doesn't work as my body is "I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO PUT THE STRESS". I am really mean towards myself and I am trying hard not to be an ass and we don't talk about the fact that I need days to like... put away the laundry, put groceries into the cabinets or have crafting materials scattered around everywhere. It's just a real mess in here.
Overall I just... pour energy into crafts bc I have no idea where to put it. I would love to just go for a good old inline skate round but I don't want to carry my skates through the landscape for 10 minuted bc we have no streets q_q;
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I know I stacked on a lot and less would be better (heck I challenged myself to cook more variety again and ofc I got competitive with myself but went out of my comfort zone and then wasn't able to estimate things anymore... if you know me closer you know what that means), but right now it's about finding the balance here as when i do nothing it just ... gets worse.
Concluding this means I am on a tightrope with things and there is not much needed to make me fall (again). I have projects to work on, but I get too invested and then overdo it which means ~ more stress~ ... good thing I can't work on Lenalee unless the new zippers arrive and sewing in general is not really appealing to me.
But I prepped everything for sewing for her and Maple, I have cut parts for the Allen Clown Cosplay, even started the buttons (& remade those already bc first attempt left me unsatisfied), I made the cover for the next fic update but I don't want to post everything at once.
Don't forget the situation at work made me an expert in how to get a lot of shit done in very little time and to use every minute I have to get the most results out of the time I have. Slowing down is a real issue I have to learn.
This entry doesn't make much sense but if you have read until here just know I thank you for your attention. This month is mainly DGM themed everything as the series turns 20. I have photos with OC dolls queued up and once I have the mind for more sewing I will work on Maple.
There is cosplay progress from a while ago, cosplay photos, drawings, lots of doll progress from Kanda to come and in general some very pretty photos I am found of.
Oh and the travel blog regarding the HanaCon is written I will post it soon, maybe not today bc it's enough already.
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isshua · 2 years ago
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Messianic Aureation
Chapter 8: Lessons from the Kreideprinz
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Summary: Under Albedo’s guidance, Cara chooses to spend weeks in Dragonspine in order to learn how to use a sword with the hope that she will become a better fighter in order to protect both herself and her friends. Will she finally learn how to unlock the mysterious power that lies within her?
Sorry for the long wait on this chapter! It was supposed to come out way sooner, but it went through so many edits and revisions that I couldn't publish it until I was satisfied. I will admit that this isn’t one of my favorite chapters that I’ve written, but I really did enjoy writing Cara’s interactions with Albedo. I hope you all do too! Likes and reblogs are greatly appreciated! :)
Chapter 9 is here
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“Cara.”
“Your Grace.”
“It’s time to wake up.”
Cara moaned out a sleepy protest and snuggled deeper into the warmth of her blankets. The voice calling out to her was pulling her into the conscious world. “Five more minutes,” she drowsily begged.
“I’m afraid not,” the voice said. “You’ve been asleep for quite a while, and we must begin your training. You can’t battle an Archon defenseless, after all.”
Training. The memory of the previous day resurfaced. Cara groaned one more time before sitting up and drowsily opening her eyes. Albedo was beside her, a smile on his face as he greeted her. “Good morning.”
“Morning,” she murmured while she rubbed her eyes. “How long was I out?”
“You fell asleep yesterday afternoon and slept soundly through the night,” Albedo informed.
“Seriously?” Cara yawned. “Huh, that’s weird. Usually I don’t sleep for that long without waking up on my own at some point.”
“Immortals have many similarities to humans,” Albedo explained. “They recover their energy through means of rest, but in much longer intervals. Barbatos was asleep for 1,000 years while his wounds from the Archon War healed. Your body works in the same way. This period of sleep you just experienced was a reaction triggered by your immune system in order to heal yourself from the strain of waypoint traveling and being alone in the Dragonspine wilderness.”
Cara was way too tired to comprehend anything the alchemist just said, but also didn’t want to awkwardly dismiss him and possibly hurt his feelings. “I had no idea that my body could do that. Strange. Maybe I’ll have more energy for training now. Speaking of training, before we begin, can we have breakfast if it’s okay with you? I don’t work well on an empty stomach.”
Albedo chuckled. “Of course. I as well can become quite famished after waking up in the morning. I will give you some privacy so you can prepare for the day. There is a hairbrush and some hygienic supplies on that shelf over there for you to use. When you are ready, come meet me outside of the camp. I will have a hearty breakfast made up for the both of us so we are adequately energized for our training session.”
Cara sat on her cot for a good minute after he left, reveling in the feeling of her blankets surrounding her before she decided to get up and start the day. She raised her arms over head and arched her back in a deep stretch, a noise of satisfaction escaping her as she did so. Then she headed over to the shelf Albedo pointed out and began the process of her morning hygiene routine.
When she was finished, she felt fresh and clean, as well as more awake. But as she turned to go outside to join Albedo, she realized something. Her clothes were filthy, with multiple tears and small holes scattered through the fabric. Albedo had been right when he said that waypoint traveling wasn’t very good for one’s attire. The cloak Razor gave her seemed fine enough, but the tunic and pants from Uncle Elias looked like they were on their last legs. She couldn’t continue to wear these; if she did, they would fall apart.
 I guess I could wear my traveler outfit, she thought. It was the only other piece of clothing she owned, after all, and thus her only option. She took out her backpack and reached into the void, concentrating her mind on the image of the colors of the outfit. Instantly her fingers closed around the shirt and shorts. When she pulled them out and observed them, she felt a sense of familiarity, which she found rather odd. She had only worn this outfit for a few days, but despite that, when she looked at the black diamond on the front of the shirt, she felt an intense intuition that this was something she was meant to wear, like it was literally made for her and no one else.
After changing into it, she observed the way it fit her like a glove. The shirt and shorts brought comfort to her. I guess I can wear this from now on, even if it makes me stand out more than I’d like. A sudden breeze of cold air from the outside blew into the camp, and she shivered. I wish they weren’t shorts, though. Even if it is summer, Dragonspine’s temperature never seems to rise above 30 degrees.
As she thought this, suddenly, her shirt and shorts started to glow a bright gold. She gasped as it consumed her entire body from the neck down. It lasted for only but a moment before ebbing away, and what was revealed to her had her shocked.
Her short-sleeved outfit was no longer short-sleeved. Now, her shirt had thick sleeves that went down to her wrists, and her shorts were baggy pants that shielded her legs from the elements. Her twin tail cape had transformed into a long black-and-gold cloak with a puffy hood. Somehow, her traveler outfit had heard her thoughts about the frigidity of Dragonspine and changed to fulfill her wish to keep warm. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, though. Anything is possible when you're trapped in a fantasy videogame world.
 She found Albedo by the cliff overlooking the massive ribcage of Durin. He was sitting on one of his Solar Isotomas, and a cooking pot was set up to his right. “Okay, I’m here,” she said to him. “Sorry if I took too long.”
“You didn’t take long at all. I was just admiring the view while I prepared breakfast. Here, let me-” His eyes widened in surprise when he looked at her and took in her new outfit. “Oh, you changed your clothes.”
“The outfit I was wearing wasn't in the best condition,” she told him. “And this one is…unique. I woke up in it when I first arrived in this world, and apparently it can read my mind to change its appearance based on how warm or cold I get. Before, it was short-sleeved, but after I felt how low the temperature was, it turned into a winter version of itself.”
“It must be a gift from Teyvat,” Albedo said. “It does have a distinct aura to it that feels very similar to the one you possess. Perhaps we can take a sample of the fabric and put it through some tests to see how it reacts to certain elements…”
“I think I’ll pass on that,” Cara hastily said. “I already have one outfit with a bunch of holes in it, and I definitely don’t need another.”
“If you say so.” Albedo raised his hand and squeezed it into a fist. A second Solar Isotoma erupted out of the snow-covered earth to the left of his own. “Come and sit with me. I made pancakes.”
Cara settled down on the strange Geo flower and felt a hum of energy send little tremors through her body. “I didn’t know you used your Vision in such a casual manner,” she commented.
“Ah, well, it is nothing more than a tool for me,” Albedo said. “My Vision aids me in my experiments, and I see no difference between it from a beaker or a crucible. The same can be said when I use its power to create something as simple as a seat. Visions are gifts from the gods, but they are also an extension of their wielder. It might as well be another limb. So, why shouldn’t I use it to aid me in everyday happenings like I might use my own two hands?”
“That’s…actually a smart way of looking at it,” Cara said. “I mean, obviously you should use a Vision according to how you see fit to use it, as long as you're not, you know, going on murdering sprees or whatever. You earned this power, so why not take advantage of it?”
“Exactly,” Albedo agreed. “You understand. By the way, speaking of Visions, I have been meaning to ask you something. Do you feel any sense of connection to the manifestation of Geo you are sitting upon right now? As Teyvat’s Creator, and therefore the original creator of Visions, I want to know if you might have some subconscious control over one, even if it’s not your own.”
Cara looked down at the Solar Isotoma and pressed a hand against it. It was slightly warm to the touch and glowed a bit brighter than it had been, but besides that, there were no further reactions. “I don’t know if I might be able to control Visions. Do you really think I’m capable of doing something that powerful?”
“It is a possibility,” Albedo replied. “However, I have my doubts. A Vision is the manifestation of a person’s ambitions, so it might be quite difficult for someone else to control those ambitions. We will have to return to this topic in the form of an experiment after your training concludes. Perhaps Sucrose will be willing to lend us her Vision to use so we can run through some Anemo-based tests.” He took a plate from beside the cooking pot and piled a stack of pancakes onto it. “Here you go,” he said as he handed it to Cara. “Breakfast is served.”
Delicious satisfaction filled her mouth and stomach while Cara ate them. “Albedo, these are so good!” she praised. “I don’t understand how you could think you aren’t awesome at cooking!”
“I wouldn’t say it is what I am best at,” Albedo said rather bashfully. “I do enjoy a little bit of cooking from time to time, but there are certainly other people in Monstadt who are far better at it than I am. I appreciate the approval. I would give any chance to make food for my god.” He took a bite from his own plate of pancakes. “Sucrose introduced this recipe to me. Pancakes aren’t a dish I indulge in often, but I will say that they are definitely delicious.”
“By the way, where are Sucrose and Klee?” Cara asked. “Did they ever come back and tell you if Kaeya, Bennett, and Razor are alright?”
“They returned while you were sleeping,” he answered. “Sucrose informed Kaeya about your whereabouts, and he passed the information on to Bennett and Razor, who are hiding away in Wolvendom due to the fact that Bennett is currently a wanted criminal in Monstadt.”
Cara blanched and nearly dropped her plate. “What?”
“Rest assured that all three of them are okay,” Albedo said. “I did tell them though that it would be safer if they didn’t come to visit you out of the need for discrepancy. Sucrose and Klee will also be giving the two of us some solitude so we can focus on your training without interruption. I will keep them all regularly updated with letters noting your progress.” He paused for a moment when he saw the look of utter horror on her face. “Are…are you okay with not seeing Kaeya, Bennett, and Razor for some time? If you wish to see them sooner, I suppose we can set up a location to meet out of the sight of the knights.”
But Cara wasn’t listening to him. All she could think about was Bennett, how he was now being targeted by the knights for a crime as simple as being her friend and ally. “He’s wanted because of me,” she said with a quiver in her voice. “All because he decided to help me, his entire life is ruined. It’s all my fault.”
“Cara.” Albedo placed his hand on her shoulder. “Please, do not blame yourself. Bennett was extremely brave to stand up for you and help you escape the city. I know I would have done the exact same thing if I were in his position. You need to remember that we are not in the wrong here. It is the knights who are being controlled by the Madness, not us. So do not feel like any violence being enacted in this nation is your fault. You are here to put an end to it. For that to happen, you must remain alive.”
“I can’t let this happen anymore,” she whispered. “Albedo, if anyone is killed because they were caught giving me aid, I will never be able to live with myself. I’ve already endangered Bennett’s life. I can’t endanger anyone else’s. I have to get out of Teyvat. I have to get home.”
“That can’t happen if you don’t regain your original power,” Albedo reminded her. “This is why I have decided to teach you how to use a sword. Once you know how to defend yourself, you can defend others. I will help you learn. The more knowledgeable in the art of battle you become, the closer we get to ridding this world of the Madness once and for all.”
Cara wanted to tell him that she couldn’t care less about whether the Madness continued to exist in Teyvat or not. That was what she would have said if this were only her first day here, after she had just been run out of Monstadt City by the knights. However, when she dwelled on it, she realized that if she were to say this to Albedo now, after learning about the Madness and its mind-controlling effect on people, telling him she didn’t care it would be a lie. Deep down, she did care. She cared about Jean, and Amber, and Eula, and everyone else who wanted her dead. She couldn’t help it. Genshin Impact was something she loved, and by extension, she loved the characters. Getting back to her own world was her number one priority…but, if there was a way to get rid of the Madness, then she wouldn’t mind doing that, too.
“Your Grace,” Albedo said. “Are you ready to begin your training?”
Cara didn’t hesitate. If she learned how to fight, she would have a higher chance of defeating the Archons and getting home. That was her motivation. That was her drive. “Yes.”
“Good.” He stood up. “Let’s bring our plates and utensils back to the camp. Then, your first day of learning to use a sword will begin. Come and follow me.”
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The Prototype Rancour was a beautiful weapon, one that felt extremely lethal in Cara’s hands. She gripped the hilt tightly and held it up to the rays of the sun, watching the way the sword’s gold-and-bronze metal gleamed. The tassel attached to the end of the hilt was rough leather, and the little blue orb at its base made a slight jingling sound whenever she brushed her fingers against it. This was a blade meant to be wielded by a seasoned warrior, not a person like her who knew absolutely nothing about fighting.
“What do you think?” Albedo asked her. “It’s a fine sword, isn’t it?”
“It is,” she replied. “I don’t think I deserve to use it, though.” She lowered the sword and looked at him. “Are you sure you want me to use this for training? Aren’t you afraid I’ll ruin it somehow?”
Albedo shook his head and sighed. “You are far too kind for this world, Your Grace. Allow me to answer you with a question of my own. Do you recognize this sword?”
Cara studied the blade. “It’s a Prototype Rancour,” she said. “It’s Liyueian, and its strength lies in physical attack.”
“Yes, but do you know the history behind this specific one?” Albedo carefully took the blade in his hands and ran his palm over it. “This was my first gift from the Creator after becoming a Vessel. It was years ago, but I have held onto it ever since. You entrusted me with this weapon as a sign of recognition that I was worthy of your power. Now, I want to return it to you.”
“Oh my god,” Cara gasped. “I completely forgot about that!” She recalled when she first received Albedo from his banner after pulling for him, how excited she had been to finally have him as her own. She forged, ascended, and refined this Prototype Rancour just for him. “But why do you want to give it to me now? Do…do you not like it?”
“Quite the opposite,” Albedo said. “I love this weapon, but after receiving a second sword from you, I realized the Prototype Rancour just doesn’t work with my skills as effectively as my new sword does.” He brought out another blade: it was a Cinnabar Spindle. Cara had equipped it to him after receiving it by completing the ‘Shadows Amidst Snowstorms’ event that happened last year. “I didn’t want to simply get rid of my first gift from the Creator, however, so I decided to hold onto it as a sort of backup in case my Cinnabar Spindle was suddenly lost. I would like to give it to you so it can be used once again.”
“Wow,” Cara murmured. “Thank you, Albedo. I promise I’ll take good care of it.”
“I know you will. Now, to training.” Albedo raised his sword. “The art of swordfighting is a complicated one. When wielding such a weapon, it is important to remember one thing: always be aware of what you are doing. An inexperienced person such as yourself can easily cut off her arm with her own sword if she is not aware of where her blade is going when she swings. So, we will begin with mastering a proper stance. Watch me.”
The way he held his sword was one of grace, and when he swung it, she saw that grace mingle with ferocity. She marveled at the way he handled the weapon with practiced ease, how it almost seemed like a second limb. When he finished his display, she voiced how impressed she was. “That was incredible!”
He smiled. “Thank you. Let’s try to get you to do the same. Adjust your body according to my orders, alright? Stand with your feet shoulder width apart. Move your right foot back a little…yes, just like that. Lower your sword to your middle. Hold it in only your dominant hand, it will grant you much more versatility. Keep your back straight, but not too straight. You must be prepared to bend and dodge when you are in battle.”
Cara did her best to follow his orders. Thankfully, she seemed to be adjusting herself to his satisfaction, because he nodded in approval. “You are still a little tense, but that is to be expected from a beginner. Besides that, I’d say your stance is almost as good as mine. Well, almost, of course. It would be hard to become as great a swordfighter as I instantly.”
“Har har,” Cara said affably with a smile. “Classic Albedo, ever so humble.”
Albedo exhaled a small laugh. “I am teaching the God Above All Gods to swordfight. Of course I must remain humble. Humor aside, you do need some improvement, but as I said, that is expected from a beginner. Let’s practice swinging together so you can mirror my moves.” He held his sword in front of him. “Again, with me.”
Cara nodded and obeyed. She raised her sword, this time with the determination to be perfect in his eyes.
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For the first few weeks Cara was with Albedo, they did nothing but focus on her stance and swinging. Her determination and diligent practicing eventually pulled off, because one day, he deemed her skilled enough to move onto the second phase of her training. “You have greatly improved since the first time you picked up a sword,” he said. “Though you are nowhere close to being a true expert, I believe you are prepared enough to begin practice-fighting.”
“Am I going to be fighting you?” Cara asked.
Albedo shook his head. “No. Not yet at least. You are nowhere near being strong enough to take me on in even a mock battle. For now, you will be practicing with these.” He gestured to three wooden structures lined up before her. Each one had a trio of large red-gray-and-ivory horns attached to them with chains. “These are training dummies I, ah, borrowed from a nearby hilichurl tribe a few days ago. Your task is to dispatch them as quickly as possible.”
“Oh.” Cara tried to mask her disappointment. She had been hoping Albedo would continue to be as hands-on with her training as he had been with her stance and swinging practice. I’m only learning so well because he’s here to help me. “Okay, I can do that. I’m not very fast, though, just to warn you.”
“Don’t be discouraged,” Albedo said, ever able to pick up on her emotions. “I will still be here to tell you where you are going right and where you are going wrong. Once I have deemed you are ready, I will allow you to fight me. But only when you have gained my approval.”
For Albedo, everything was an experiment. Cara guessed it was just in his nature as someone who thought so scientifically to study every single little thing he came across. She was a case no different; while she practiced attacking the hilichurl dummies over and over again, Albedo kept notes, his feathered pen flying across his clipboard while he studied her movements with great attention. She listened to him mumble his writings out loud. “Hm, speed is average, as are endurance levels. But attack blows are sharp and precise, most likely due to these past weeks’ practice…in conclusion, your performance is, to put it simply, mediocre in terms of attack movement.”
Cara deflated, shame and embarrassment crawling over her skin, her stomach dropping like a heavy rock.
“This isn’t something to be upset about,” Albedo said. “You should have expected this from the very beginning. As someone who has never fought with a sword before, you shouldn’t be able to go into a training session and pass with flying colors on your first try. These skills take time to perfect, and trust me, as we continue, you will become better. I went through the same thing when my master started teaching me how to wield a sword. Besides-” He tapped his clipboard. “I said your performance was mediocre, not sloppy. When I sometimes watch rookie knights practice at the Knights of Favonius training grounds, I always mark their performances ‘sloppy,’ with very few lucky exceptions. This was my first time seeing you train with a dummy, and you scored a ‘mediocre.’ You are doing better than you think you do, Your Grace. Let that fact comfort you.”
“Okay.” Cara shook off her self-consciousness, eager to do better for both herself and him. “I will. Let me try again.”
Albedo resumed his writing. “Be my guest.”
She turned back to the training dummies and went in for the attack. Just as she was about to slash her sword towards one of the first dummy’s horns though, her foot got caught in a pile of thick snow. She gasped when she fell flat on her face. Her sword slipped out of her hand and into the snow with a plop.
“Cara!” Albedo cried. He was at her side in an instant to help her up. “Are you alright? Are you hurt?”
Cara spat snow out of her mouth and pulled her hood over her head to hide her red cheeks. Humiliation once again flooded through her. “I’m fine,” she mumbled.
She heard him sigh, and then he gently pulled her hood back. “Things like this happen,” he said as he took her sword and folded her hand back around its hilt. “Pick yourself up and start anew. There is no point in feeling ashamed now, not after all of the progress you have made.”
She took her sword and smoothed back her hair. When she looked at the three dummies, she didn’t notice a single scuff mark on either of them. There were no blade cuts, no dents, nothing. She was going at these things with all she had, and she couldn’t even leave a noticeable blow. Exasperated and disappointed with herself, she felt a surge of anger and punched the nearest dummy as hard as she could without a second thought.
The connection between her fist and the dummy resounded with a rippling boom throughout the area. Instead of what should have happened-bloody knuckles and bruised skin-practically the opposite occurred. The dummy was sent rocketing backwards and straight over the cliff into Wyrmrest Valley. Cara was left standing with her fist extended in place, jaw dropping as her anger diminished and she realized what she had just done. There was no pain, only a feeling of intense power. A bit shakily, she examined the glowing gold veins pulsing across her hand. When she yanked her sleeve back, she saw that they snaked up her arm and straight to her shoulder. They were the same color as her blood.
“Oh my,” Albedo said. “That…was certainly a bit unexpected.” He took her arm and traced the veins, sending little shivers down Cara’s back. He then pressed his fingers against the bottom of her wrist, right where her pulse was. “As I thought. Your blood is glowing through your skin.”
“Wait. Those are actually my veins?”
“It appears so,” Albedo confirmed. “The energy surging through your arm right now is matching the rhythm of your heartbeat. This is just a hypothesis, but I think your blood might have helped supercharge your arm when you punched that dummy so you could gain the necessary power to send it careening backwards with such a massive amount of force. Truly fascinating. I was right to think your blood has properties beyond its unique color.”
As he spoke, the veins dimmed, and then vanished completely. Albedo let go of her arm. “I am impressed. We should integrate strength training into your lessons from now on. Such raw physical power will aid you greatly in a fight against an Archon. I wonder, would even the eldest of the Seven be able to withstand such a punch from the Creator?”
He was speaking so casually. Cara voiced her disbelief. “How-how are you so relaxed about this? I just found out I have superhuman strength, and you're talking about me taking on Rex Lapis in a fistfight? You have to be as terrified about this as I am! I could kill someone if I punched them like that!”
“Of course you could,” Albedo said, completely nonchalantly. “You of all people shouldn’t be surprised by this. You are a god. You have strength that is incomparable to any mortal. You could take something as harmless as a pine needle and turn it into a weapon of war. Do not underestimate yourself. This body of yours is capable of great destruction.”
Cara stared at him. She didn’t know how to reply to his words and simply looked at her arm again with a creeping sense of great disturbance and fear.
“I think we can wrap up training for today. I will do a little further investigation on that blood sample we took from you.” Albedo walked back towards the camp. “Come along, I’ll make us some dinner. If you don’t mind, I’m in the mood for some Sweet Madame tonight…”
Cara didn’t follow him right away. Instead, she walked to the edge of the cliff and looked down. The training dummy had gained a lot of ground from the force of her punch. She saw it's remains far away, a scattered pile of smashed wood and keratin, barely visible through the misty snow. Such destruction created by nothing more than a punch. It was inhuman.
“Cara!” Albedo called from the warmth of the camp. “Come along!”
She turned and followed him without a word.
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After spending the following weeks doing agility runs, strength training, stance exercises, and hitting practice shots on the hilichurl dummies, Albedo finally deemed her skilled enough to take him on in a mock battle. At first, she was thrilled to finally have the opportunity to put all she had learned to the test. But then she remembered how powerful Albedo was and grew nervous. “You’ll go easy on me, right?”
“I won’t hurt you, if that is what you are afraid of,” Albedo answered. “But I certainly won’t be gentle, either.”
“Alright.” Cara took out her Prototype Rancour. “If I win, you have to make dinner tonight.”
“I enjoy cooking for you. Making dinner is hardly a punishment for losing. But if you wish for that to be the prize, so be it.” Albedo unsheathed his Cinnabar Spindle. “I hope your culinary skills are sufficient enough to make me dinner, Your Grace, because it is you who will be standing at the cooking pot tonight.”
They faced each other, both of them still, until Albedo called out “Begin.” As quickly as possible, Cara raised her sword in a defensive stance; she knew Albedo was more experienced than her, so going in for the attack could immediately put her at a disadvantage. Albedo was in front of her in an instant, his sword slamming against her own. A loud clang reverberated as metal met metal.
“Your strength and reaction time have gotten better,” he said. “Impressive. An ordinary mortal would have been thrown back by that attack.”
“I guess the reason why I was able to withstand it is because I’m a god?” Cara shoved forward and twirled the hilt of her sword in the direction of his hand, with the intention of knocking his weapon away. Albedo foresaw her move and raised his arm in a quick dodge. They were once again separated by distance, but her mentor kept up the conversation like he wasn’t participating in a fight. “Actually, yes. Caratrice witnessed countless battles before her death, and being the leader of the Nine, her fighting skills were unparalleled. The legends say just seeing a glimpse of her fabled sword, the Veritas Incarnata, was enough to vaporize a person in an instant. And since you are her reincarnation, those memories of battle are somewhere deep inside your psyche. I have been seeing traces of their manifestation since we began your training.”
“I doubt that,” Cara grunted. “I don’t think it would be that easy for me to remember the fighting skills of a god that lived thousands of years ago.” She thought for a moment. “Hey, Albedo?”
“Yes?”
“Why are you helping me?”
“What do you mean?”
Their swords clashed. Cara braced herself against Albedo’s push of strength. “Almost everyone in Monstadt wants me dead. Why don’t you? Because of me, your position as chief-alchemist, your life, and everything you’ve worked for is in jeopardy. Wouldn’t it be easier for you to hand me over to Jean instead of going through all of the trouble of hiding and training me?”
“It would.” Albedo swept a foot towards her legs, but she jumped back before he could make her fall. “Not only would I be safe, but Klee and Sucrose would be as well. If I were to turn you in, I would do it not for myself, but for them to ensure their safety.”
“Then why don’t you do it? I know you're helping me because you think I’m the key to saving Teyvat from the Madness, but if you know Klee and Sucrose would be safer if I wasn’t here, why don’t you just get rid of me?”
“Is it not obvious?” Albedo sent a wave of strikes her way. Cara parried them all, all but barely. She was starting to tire. “I consider you my friend. Your warmth, your vivacity, your entire being has been with me for years. I have heard you laugh, and I have heard you cry. I know you, and you know me. I fight for you, and with you. If I were to betray you and side with a world that wants to persecute you, I would be breaking the trust you put in me when you chose me as one of your Vessels. I want to see you live.” He hooked his sword under hers and managed to force it out of her hands. It fell, and Cara barely had enough time to react before Albedo gently pushed her to the ground. Slight pressure was applied to her middle when he pinned her in place with his knee. The blade of the Cinnabar Spindle was held inches away from her neck. “Which is why I will train you to defend yourself, so I can see you rise and reclaim your godhood. As a follower, a believer, and a friend, I want to protect you in any way I can. That is why I refuse to participate in the hunt.”
Cara was both struck dumb at how easily he had rendered her defenseless and awed at his words. “Albedo, you…you really care about me that much?”
“I would be a fool if I didn’t.” Albedo moved his sword away and stood up. He offered her his hand. “Looks like I won this round. You put up a fine fight. Are you looking forward to making dinner?”
Cara stared at his hand, then at him. He was smiling; it was a smile of fondness, a smile that emanated trust. She smiled back and took his hand. “I hope you like burnt food, because I am definitely not as good a cook as you are.”
She was helped to her feet, and had her fallen sword handed to her. “Cooking is an art in itself. As with painting and swordfighting, it is always easier to learn when you have a teacher,” Albedo said. “I will guide you, don’t worry.”
“Hey, do you think Caratrice had unbelievable cooking skills that are hidden in the recesses of my brain, too?” Cara asked as they walked back to camp.
The corners of his lips curled, and his laughter bounced off of the snowy mountainside to ring out beyond Wyrmrest Valley, so that even the lost spirit of Durin might hear. “Somehow, I certainly doubt that.”
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“A letter arrived for you,” Albedo told her one afternoon while she was cleaning her sword’s blade. He waved it in the air; it was an anonymous envelope with no name or address listed on it. Cara put her sword aside and practically snatched it right out of his hand. She tore it open and felt relief when she saw Kaeya’s elegant handwriting.
                     Hello Cara. I hope this letter finds you well. Albedo tells me that you’ve gotten stronger since I last wrote to you. Dragonspine is really turning you into quite the seasoned warrior, isn’t it? I’m honestly not surprised. You have the natural fierceness of a fighter that befits you. Remember that one time when you punched me in the stomach? I haven’t forgotten it. Sometimes I swear I can still feel the phantom pain. No hard feelings by the way.
                    Bennett and Razor say hello. I know how worried you are about them. They are safe, and I am making sure the knights won’t find them, no matter how hard they search. They can’t wait to see you again and get a look at your fancy sword. Perhaps you would like to join me in a friendly duel sometime? I would like to see how much of Albedo’s fighting skills rubbed off on you.
                    I am worried about you. I trust Albedo to keep you safe, but I can’t help but be scared that the knights might find you. Please be careful if you are ever out in the wilderness alone. Stay close to Albedo. I don’t doubt that you can defend yourself in the face of a threat, but knowing he is protecting you eases my worry. It’s always better to have a friend watching your back, no?
                   Keep training. I will write again soon. I look forward to the day when our little group reunites. It is a day that is hopefully on the horizon.
Like always, Kaeya’s words pierced through her heart. She could easily hear his voice reading the words out loud. Though she knew she couldn’t write back-she was too afraid of someone possibly discovering and outing Kaeya as a friend of hers if she did, which would definitely get him arrested or killed-she still imagined what she would say if she could. Thank you guys for sticking with me. I miss you. I love you. Please stay safe. Please be okay.
“Is everything alright?” Albedo asked. He was tinkering with some tools on his work table, but his head was inclined towards her as an indication that he was listening.
“They’re okay,” she said. “All three of them are safe. There’s no sign of the knights ever discovering any of us, and things are relatively normal. It’s just his usual check-in.”
“That’s good. I will continue to update him with your progress.” Albedo held a beaker up to the light of a torch, examining it for dust. “Kaeya wrote about how impressed he is with you, didn’t he?”
“I’m nothing to be impressed about. But I do think he’s happy to hear I’m learning how to properly fight. I do a lot more damage when I know what I’m doing. You know, I punched him in the gut once.”
Albedo made an extremely un-Albedolike snorting noise that might have been a laugh masked over by a fake cough. “Did you now?”
“Yup, ask him the next time you see him. It’s true. I could totally beat him up again.”
“I have no doubt about it. I think it would be quite…amusing. Or maybe just a tad bit pathetic on Kaeya’s part.”
Cara watched him continue to prep various pieces of experimental equipment. Curious, she got up and looked over his shoulder. “What are you doing?”
“Preparing to study the blood Sucrose took from you,” he answered. Surely enough, in the center of the work table was the vial of golden ichor, still as radiant as it had been when it was first extracted. “After your original power was temporarily activated a few weeks ago, I decided to see if I could run a few more tests on this sample and try to get more reactions. I would also like to make a request for you to fulfill.”
 Where is this going? Cara thought. “As long as it doesn’t involve taking more of my blood, I’ll consider doing it.”
“It doesn’t, don’t worry. I would like for you to go out to the training field and practice with the hilichurl dummies. Try to unlock your original power again. After you have done so, return here and tell me how you triggered it.”
“Wait, seriously?” Cara hadn’t expected his request to be that. “But I don’t know how to make it happen again. I don’t even know how I activated it the first time.”
“Your powers seem strongly linked to your emotions,” Albedo said. “When you got angry, you channeled your power without even realizing it. You let go. If you do that again, maybe the results will prove to be successful.”
“Well…okay. Are you sure you're alright with me training by myself? Aren’t you afraid I’m going to accidentally cut my own arm off or something?”
“I don’t have to worry about that anymore,” he said. “You have been training for weeks now. You’ve grown skilled with your sword, and you have an understanding of how to handle it. I am no longer concerned that you might hurt yourself while training. Think of this as a sort of…graduation. If you don’t end up losing a limb to the blade of your own weapon, I will allow you to train by yourself more often. Deal?”
“Okay, deal. I’ll be back after I get my veins to turn gold again. Hopefully I’ll be able to do it.” She sheathed her sword. “I’ll be back before dinner.”
The hilichurl dummies were no longer set up right outside of the camp as they once had been. She and Albedo moved them to a larger area so she could work on both her attack skills and agility at the same time. Cara had to walk up a small hill to make it to the snow-covered field where the dummies stood. She drew her cloak closer around her and twirled her sword a few times as she stared them down. “Alright, dummies. Albedo finally trusts me not to kill myself with my own sword, and I’m sure as hell not going to give him a reason to regret it. You're going down.”
There was a long pause. Cara closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Inhale. Then let it out. Exhale. She slid her foot back, braced her shoulders, and held up her sword. When her eyes opened, they locked onto the first dummy like magnets. Then, she shot forward, raised the Prototype Rancour, and brought the blade down upon its wood. Chop! The top was cleaved off. Cara didn’t stop. She retracted her sword, spun, and cut the second dummy down, right through its midsection. Wood splintered. The wind blew. She could feel it moving with her arms, as if Teyvat were holding her hands and guiding her to swing with more speed, more momentum. Maybe it was.
The last dummy sat condescendingly in front of her, unharmed. Cara turned to face it, and without thinking, drew her arm back and hurled her sword forward. It sped through the air like an arrow, moving faster than it should have been, and pierced straight through the dummy’s chest. But it didn’t stop there. The sword continued to fly, until it was eventually stopped by a massive boulder. Cara heard the sharp crack of breaking rock, followed by a shudder in the wind. She went still and panted, stunned at how fast and ruthless she had just acted.
When she walked over to the boulder to retrieve her sword, what she saw was incredible. The Prototype Rancour was practically embedded into the rock, with giant splinters branching from the point of impact all throughout its surface. Cara had thrown the sword with so much strength and speed, the weapon had literally broken through what should have been unbreakable.
Albedo’s words from the other week replayed in her head. “You are a god. You have strength that is incomparable to any mortal. You could take something as harmless as a pine needle and turn it into a weapon of war. Do not underestimate yourself. This body of yours is capable of great destruction.”
Mildly disturbed by how many changes she had gone through upon entering this world while remaining visibly the same, Cara grabbed the hilt of her sword and pulled it out with little difficulty. She ran a hand over the cracks in the boulder. She didn’t want to admit it, but the idea of her being a god was becoming more and more believable. No ordinary person should be able to cause this sort of damage to a boulder. She wasn’t even sure if Albedo could do such a thing without gaining some sort of power boost from his Vision. Yet she did it all on her own.
The snowfall had picked up, and the wind began to howl. Cara looked up and saw that the usual Dragonspine gray sky was now completely blotted out by white. There’s a storm coming, she thought. I better head back to the camp. I don’t want to be caught in this. She fulfilled Albedo’s request and once again awakened her hidden strength. Once the storm subsided, she would bring him to this boulder and show him what she did. He’s going to be so excited once he sees it.
She was about to put her sword away and begin the short trek back, when without warning, the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end, and her heart started thumping. Cara froze, her grip on the Prototype Rancour’s hilt tightening. This wasn’t a warning from Teyvat, but rather a premonition that something was about to happen, something disastrous, something life-threatening. She wanted to run, but didn’t get a chance to, and turned around just in time to see a giant bird made entirely out of fire flying straight towards her.
Her agility lessons with Albedo proved useful. She threw herself out of the firebird’s line of attack. The creature slammed into the boulder with a screech, and an eruption of flames burst through the area. Cara was hit with the sweltering heat and ducked her head to protect her face from it. When the light of the flames winked out, she lifted her face out of her arms and saw what the firebird had done to the boulder. It was completely shattered, now nothing more than a series of jagged rocks, every single one of them blackened and smoldered.
She whipped her head in the direction of approaching footsteps. Out of the worsening snowstorm came a man dressed in a large winter coat with a hood over his head. In his hand was a claymore on fire, the Pyro energy swirling over the massive blade and leaving a sweltering scent in the air. When the man pulled back his hood, she saw his familiar red hair, along with ruby eyes glowering with a hatred that burned like hellfire.
“There you are, imposter,” Diluc snarled. “I’ve finally found you. Now, let’s see how long it takes for you to crack.”
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umichenginabroad · 5 months ago
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Week 0: Sleep 0
Hi, my name is Alex Shamoun, a rising sophomore in Robotics. I am Michigan born and raised and I am very excited to be able to share my journey through Reykjavik, Iceland. Iceland is a very unique country in both geography and culture. Iceland being an island formed with a large amount of volcanic activity gives it both a geographic uniqueness and due to its separation from everyone else it was able to be culturally unique. Over these next 7 weeks I can’t wait to share what I get to learn and experience with you. 
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Me getting my last bit of real sleep for the next 48 hours.
I will say that while Iceland may be a really nice destination to visit, packing to be here for 7 weeks was not fun. That comes from the fact that Iceland is cold and windy, but despite being from Michigan I don’t really know what I am going to be dealing with. I’ve mostly got a lot of sweaters and hoodies but I also have my fair share of graphic tees and UofM shirts. I spent multiple days packing and repacking just to try and make sure I am well prepared for whatever environments and situations confront me. I think I have enough stuff to where no matter what happens I will be good but who knows. What will I be able to wear or will I freeze? I will learn that and much more very soon. 
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The mess that is trying to pack for Iceland and being unsuccessful in said venture.
I am writing part of this while at Reykjavik airport after landing from my overnight flight. We left DTW at 8:30 pm and it was a group of four of us UofM students on an Icelandair flight. I will say that Icelandair was kind of alright. The price was pretty good (when compared to Delta), however there was no meal for a 6 hour trans-Atlantic flight (you have to buy it). I ended up just eating some Kaleche(middle eastern pastry) I had packed with me to satiate my hunger. Once we got off the plane and got through customs we were met with our fabled guide for the next 7 weeks Christopher, and oh boy did he live up to the legends. 
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The man, the myth, the legend: Christopher, keeping us entertained.
Christopher was foretold to us by the students of last year as a very eccentric and high energy man and for it being 6 am that was definitely true. He was up and active, telling dad jokes, speaking in a high energy voice and was tryna get us going and honestly it was working. This man actually worked miracles on us, while the jokes weren’t the best it was just the fact that we were able to talk and his energy was flowing into us just by being around him. Christopher was honestly one of the only things that got us through the morning and the airport.
On the drive over from the airport to our apartment we were able to actually see the volcano that is erupting. While we weren’t able to get too close, we were still able to see the smoke plume of toxic gas coming from the volcano. It was really interesting that it was just literally that close to the place we all flew into and that it was completely safe for us to  be there.
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The volcanic plumes in the distance
After this we all got situated in our apartments and worked out details with roommates. The view from my apartment was absolutely fantastic. I’m in a 3 bedroom apartment where I thankfully have a single room. We have a balcony on the 4th floor and so you can see the Hallgrimskirkja church (extremely large lutheran church) (pictured at the end) over the heads of all the buildings and it’s really beautiful.
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Everyone in the apartments after the drive, trying to stay awake while waiting for them to let us in.
We were given some free time in which we went to the grocery store ( of which I’ll probably talk more about next week) and just explored the city. In the end it was a lot of walking which I am going to be doing again tomorrow. To cap the day off and bring an end to probably hte most busy and tiring 24 hours of my life, we went to a really fancy restaurant called Loa. We had a magnificent 3 course meal. I had lamb soup, lamb shank, and (not lamb) chocolate cake. Iceland is known for its lamb and fish, and this was some really good and tender lamb. Honestly though, the chocolate cake was what really sold me on the meal, it was absolutely delicious and exactly the right amount of chocolate. 
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This lamb shank was glazed in a sauce, cooked on top of mashed potatoes and roasted vegetables. 
I have had a really busy day (i’ve been up all day and yesterday) so I am going to call it a night and send this off and report more of my journey later. Stay tuned and have a wonderful night.
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The view from my window at 12:30 am, the sun never sets on Iceland, much like the British. The Hallgrimskirkja church is the tall tower that is pointing out of the skyline.
-Alex Shamoun
Robotics
Engineering in Reykjavik
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these-velvet-comforts · 6 months ago
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it's you that i lie with (III)
It was—what, midnight? —when you had survived the encounter with Dudley. That alone sapped the energy out of you until the next day, where you finally stirred awake when the sun is almost at its peak. But the morning has treated you well. Mrs. Figg left in the early hours to do who knows what at this point, leaving you with a pantry stocked full of treats and the buzzing TV to play anything your heart desires. The cats have even ventured off into the unknown and left you to your lonesome, except for Mr. Tibbles who cannot bear to leave the house now that he doesn’t need to stalk Harry.
All of the windows’ shades are shut, locking you inside away from the outside world of your own accord. The pantry is ripe for the taking as the TV beckons you forth with cartoons and drama. Even Mr. Tibbles is ambivalent, letting you pet him without rebellion.
In other words, this afternoon will be the peak of laziness–-
Knock knock knock.
“Nooooo,” you whisper to yourself, sluggishly sliding off the couch, trying to squeeze between the couch’s legs and the coffee table, “no, no, nooooo, not now.”
Knock knock knock.
“...Hello?”
You groan as you recognize the voice. Betraying your inhibitions, you begrudgingly get up and stumble towards the door. For a moment, you are self-conscious about the fact that it is two in the afternoon, yet you are still wearing beaten up plaid bottoms and an all but disintegrating, cartoon mouse clad, mysteriously stained shirt. Then you remember that you don’t really care what he thinks about you.
Now less of a shaken leaf and more of a stiff board, Dudley stands before you as you crack the front door open.
“You…You said you’d help me."
"Yes," you give a defeated sigh, opening the door and allowing Dudley to come in, "yes, I did."
The teen bully awkwardly sits in the middle of the couch–-the couch you had beautifully dented while trying to nap not so long ago. Goodbye and goodnight, perfect napping spot. It went far too gently into that good night, you lament to yourself.
As you mourn, Dudley takes in the outdated wallpaper and furniture with a bouncing leg. After a pregnant pause—one where you waited for him to speak, and he waited for you to—you give in and break the silence.
"So, what did you want to know?"
"There's a lot," he says, sheepish at the fact. You respond with a casual shrug which causes Dudley’s shoulders to relax a bit.
"It's a whole new world for you so it is natural. No shame in it."
He nods with an embarrassing look still plastered onto his face. 
"What is Hogwarts?"
"Uhh…it's a school for young wizards and witches?"
"Yes, I know that. But what…what is it like?"
"Oh, um…" You somewhat understand what he is asking. Despite Dudley's vague question, you reply in an almost Wikipedia style rambling. "Hogwarts is a castle built for teaching young witches and wizards everything possible about magic. Potions, Charms, Herbology, Defense Against the Dark Arts, and more. They also teach subjects that focus on the non-magical like math, history, and culture. Hogwarts was established several hundred years ago by four founders, who each established their own student houses. Students can only be sorted into one house and the sorting is mandatory–"
Dudley stares at you with wide eyes and scrunched lips, as if he was constipated.
"--Too much at once?"
"...Yes." Dudley admits reluctantly.
"Alright, what did you get–-if anything?" 
And so it goes, you spend the rest of the afternoon trying to tutor a boy that's probably never touched on a fantasy novel, much less a historical textbook.
A few of the most memorable moments are:
"What are the Dark Arts?"
"Dark magic. You know, evil stuff."
"I thought that was all magic?"
"nO–"
….
"How can wizards be racist?"
"What do you mean?"
"They're all the same, right?"
"...I’m going to let you think about that statement."
….
By the end of the 'session,' it's 8 pm and the tutoring has devolved into you reclaiming your throne on the couch as a crappy horror movie plays on screen. Dudley is sitting on the ground with the posture of a ragdoll, slouching over with an elbow on his knee and fist pressed against his cheek. Remnants of your tutoring lays across the coffee table in the form of furiously scribbled on scratch paper. The notes are covered in short phrases, doodles of Hogwarts and its house symbols, and bright red arrows pointing to different sections and doodles. They covered history, culture, and everything else related to magic. Anyone else would’ve thought that they were a madman’s ravings, or a writer’s frantic story plotting and world building in the very least. Overall, the coffee table was more of a conspiracy theorist’s pinboard than anything else.
Now make it three getting institutionalized.
You cackle at the thought, which breaks Dudley from his stupor. It draws your eyes to him, and the teen is almost just as pitiful as before. There’s a hint of color in his cheeks now, but it’s obvious how shaken he still is by the pasty white bleaching his skin.
“…I don’t blame you for being scared of magic.”
“Really?” Dudley turns to you with those same wide eyes.
“Yeah. Magic is sort of a…phenomenon. It hasn’t been explained why it exists to my knowledge, but it makes the impossible possible. So, it’s natural for you to be afraid of it—but that doesn’t justify letting that dictate how you treat others—”
“—The first time I met a wizard, he gave me a bloody pig’s tail!” Dudley yelps out.
“Yeah, that’s pretty bad. But that shouldn’t define how you treat others. I mean, if I turned out to be some wizard, how’d that change your perspective of me?”
Dudley remains silent, processing your words.
“I mean, wizards can be everywhere, and you wouldn’t notice. They look like anyone and everyone. If any of them were out to get you then they would’ve done so by now—”
“But that ghost reaper thing—”
“You were in the way. It didn’t want you, it wanted Harry!” You hiss out a bit louder than intended, frustration etched into your tone. Dudley flinches. Your shoulders drop, tension leaving them for the moment, “…Sorry. I should’ve controlled my tone.”
You rub your eyes until static appears behind your eyelids. Dudley is still watching you with a now scrunched up mouth, ready to stay quiet.
“All I’m saying is that wizard and witches are still human, like anyone else.” You sigh, ready to finish this conversation and fix your gaze on the tv. The buckets of fake blood spill out of a victim in the b-grade horror movie which is more soothing to watch in comparison to holding Dudley’s gaze, “They aren’t boogeymen or unexplainable, just people. And people are complex.”
You see him nod out of the corner of your eye.
“That makes sense, I guess. It’s just…how can someone do that?” You don’t know exactly what ‘that’ is, but still answer.
“People are weird. Good, bad, cruel, kind…Magic is just an extension of that for some. Another tool or weapon at their disposal.” On screen, a character finds the now dead victim and lets out a scream—so far the best acting you’ve seen in it.
He nods—little more than tilting his head up and down—but you write it off as him being lost in thought once more. Dudley lets out a sound closest to a squawk and a grunt as he scrambles to his feet.
“It’s almost nine! Dad’s gonna have my head—”
“Wait, what, really? I thought you were their, I dunno, favorite kid?”
“I’m their only kid, and Mum will be hysterical if I stay out too late ‘cause of, you know…the d-die mentors.” His pronunciation is off, but he’s got the spirit. You give him an ‘okay’ sign with your hands from your position on the couch, too comfortable to move. Dudley brightens up at that.
“D-do I--?” Dudley stammers and gestures to the notes strewn across the coffee table. For a long moment, you consider getting up and organizing the notes for him, saying something like ‘I’ll hold onto these until next time!’, cheerily ushering him out of the door—
“…Not my responsibility,” you shrug and wiggle deeper into the sofa’s cushions. You close your eyes to finally take a nap. It’s quiet for a moment before the sound of papers being frantically shuffled together and then quick, heavy steps towards the door fill the air.
“Hey,” the footsteps stop, “tell your parents you were studying for advanced placement or something. To get ahead in life.”
“…Thanks. F-for everything.” The words sound foreign coming from him. You just nod and utter a soft ‘no problem.’
The front door creeks shut. The noise revibrates in the air for several long moments before the air settles down again. Your body remains somewhat tense for a minute, prepared for something else to interrupt, but nothing comes. Finally, finally, you can doze off--
 Knock knock knock.
“Nooooo,” you whine softly to yourself, “not again.”
Knock knock knock.
You stumble off the couch and tiredly slink over to the door. Half asleep, you crack open the door and lean against the doorframe, both from tiredness and blocking the annoyance at your doorstep. It’s dark and your gaze is bleary, but you respond to the person with a softly spoken but sharp-tongued greeting, “Did you forget something? If it’s a couple of braincells, I can’t help with that--”
“No, I’m afraid that I lost my mind long ago.” A new voice responds, full of mirth. You immediately straighten up, more awake with some tiredness still lingering, to take in the stranger. He’s tall with half-moon glasses that catch light escaping from the doorway. Velvet robes with silky details reflect the low light, and you resist the urge to smooth the fabric with your fingertips.
“…I-I think I have too.”
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vegetarian-macan · 9 months ago
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Chapter 8: Rulers of Ikebukuro
SORRY <3 WAS NOT HAVING A #GOOD TIME LAST YEAR Content warnings will be updated later but I don't really think there's anything in here besides violence?
The gentle whir of a laptop. Heavy curtains closed to block the morning light, plunging the room into darkness. Shiro sat at his desk, his eyes feeling glazed over as he forced himself to stay awake. He could get some rest in a bit, god knows he needed it, but….
On the screen in front of him was a chatroom, the website completely black and empty save for the glowing white borders of the chat box and the words [ALHAZRED IS ONLINE]. Shiro adjusted his glasses, nearly missing the bridge of his nose entirely before beginning to type out a message.
08:36[ALHAZRED] Hello Cain, are you there?
Shiro leaned back in his chair, letting out a sigh. Now he just had to wait for a response. It wasn’t necessarily early in the day— a glance at the clock at the bottom right of the laptop screen showed it was just past 8:30 a.m.— but he knew Cain woke up rather early, so his availability was up in the air. 
As the minutes passed along without a response, Shiro looked over to the Necromicon sitting at the edge of his desk, near his phone. He had set it there before turning in for the night (or morning). It hadn’t disappeared like Sora’s sword did, and even in a state of disuse, the book still eerily pulsed with energy, a low thrumming he only noticed now seemingly pouring from the pages. A gentle ding like a tinkling of a bell dissipated the sudden trance he had found himself in. A new message in the chatroom.
8:42[CAIN IS ONLINE] 8:42[CAIN] Hi. It’s been a while.
Shiro nearly hurt himself swinging back around to face his computer, typing his message out so quickly he had to stop and fix several typos he had made in his excitement.
8:43[ALHAZRED] Yeah, it has. 8:44[CAIN] I haven’t heard from you in a month. Is everything ok? 8:44[ALHAZRED] Things have been hectic around here. Sorry if I worried you.
Shiro minimized the chat window and looked on his desktop for a specific file, finding it after running his eyes over it a few times. It was a promotional page for Summons on the app store, listing the various features the app—if you could even call it that—offered. 
8:45[ALHAZRED] Actually, I was wondering if you’re familiar with this App. 8:46[ALHAZRED HAS ATTACHED AN IMAGE] 8:46[ALHAZRED] Ring any bells? 8:46[ALHAZRED] If not, nevermind. 8:47[CAIN] I know of it. That's the one rumored to have mysterious powers. 8:47[ALHAZRED] So you have heard of it! 8:48[ALHAZRED] If you don’t mind, could you tell me what you know? 8:48[CAIN] Sure, but I’d rather not type it. 8:49[ALHAZRED] Is there a problem? 8:50[CAIN] No, it’s just that it might take a while to explain over chat. 8:51[CAIN] Do you think we could meet somewhere in person today? 8:51[CAIN] If memory serves, you live in Shinjuku, right? 8:52[ALHAZRED] Yes, that’s right. 8:53[CAIN] Then shall we meet at Ikebukuro’s West Exit at 12 pm? 8:54[ALHAZRED] Really? Ikebukuro? 8:54[CAIN] Do you mind?
Did he? Ikebukuro had a reputation for a reason, one he was all too familiar with. It was dangerous, but the tradeoff was too tantalizing to ignore. Not to mention he’d get to finally meet Cain in person.
8:56[ALHAZRED] No, it’s fine. 8:57[ALHAZRED] I appreciate you taking time out of your schedule to meet me. 8:58[CAIN] Not at all. I’ve wanted to meet you in person for some time. 8:58[CAIN] Well then, I’ll see you later. 8:59[ALHAZRED] See you later. 8:59[ALHAZRED IS OFFLINE] 9:00[CAIN IS OFFLINE]
Shiro shut off his laptop, giddy with excitement from the fact that the burning questions he had about Summons were hopefully going to be answered. Maybe then the last day or so would be explained away as just artificial reality or…
He paused, staring once again at the warped leather cover of the Necronomicon. Deep inside, he knew it wasn’t. What happened with the exception a few hours earlier… it was real. All of it. How? How could a messenger app do this? Shiro let out a low and drawn out breath of exhaustion, taking off his glasses and flopping down into his bed.
He really needed to sleep.
A few hours later, as the mid-morning sun filtered in through plastic blinds, Sora lay in their totaled bed. Long ago their covers were flung off, and now they stared at the white ceiling contemplating whether to go and start the day. They hurt, there was no doubt about that. Their trip back to the school earlier in the morning took a lot longer than it should have due to the both of them needing to rest every block or so, and Sora wasn’t sure how much sleep they had actually gotten. What time was it? They weren’t entirely sure it even was the same day.
They heard a soft yawn from above them on the shelf under their window, a spark of blue pixelated light forming and flickering as Lil’ Sal’s body formed in the air. The tiny butler companion of theirs was still in his blue five-pointed star pajamas, and as he floated down to sit on their chest he lifted an equally as small sleeping mask off his eyes, the words “dad’s favorite” hand-stitched onto it.
“Good morning, Master,” he said with another yawn. “It’s currently 10 a.m. on December 7th, 2016. Did you sleep well?”        
“Mm…” Sora grumbled in response. “I want to go back to bed….”
“I bet you do, Master! You and Shiro got into a lot of trouble yesterday.” Sal rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. “But you can only rest so much before your body needs food! That friend of yours, what’s his face with the cup, sent you a message a little while ago.”
“I don’t wanna…” Sora whined, rolling onto their side, subsequently knocking Sal off. He landed on the wooden floor of the dorm room with a thud, gasping with as much offense as he could muster. He floated up off the floor, staring at them with a deep pout.
“Master if you don’t get up I’m going to yell! I’m going to yell really loud!” Sal declared. At a lack of a response, he rolled up his small sleeves, inhaled, and let out a cacophonous bleat.
Sora shot out of bed, startled and staring at Sal in total bewilderment. Sal shook his little head in triumph, floating over to Sora’s phone and unplugging it from the cord. The screen lit up, revealing a few notifications on the screen when Sora picked it up from the windowsill. 
Two of them were from Ryouta, the first asking if they’re okay, the second mentioning something about breakfast. That was three hours ago. The other notifications were from Summons, announcing recent changes in guild statuses, updates to the app, and the announcement of three new guilds: the Golden Gai Sukeban, the Arakawa Wanderers, and the Asakusa Gurus.
“What’s a Guild?” Sora asked Sal, who paused to answer, but jumped and vanished when there was a knock at the door. When they opened it, there stood Ryouta, whose expression betrayed just how concerned he was.
“Good morning, Sora! Are you…feeling alright?” He stared at their head, and they remembered that they were patched up pretty extensively.
“I’m sleepy, but I’m okay. Thank you for worrying, Ryouta.” Sora smiled at him, and the sun shining onto Ryouta from through the open window paled in comparison to the beaming smile he gave back to them.
“I kinda figured you were still resting cause you and Shiro were out there all night, right? So I didn’t worry too much, but when you didn’t respond the second time I had to make sure you were alright. It’s almost lunch time. Oh, speaking of which, do you wanna get lunch with me and Shiro?” Ryouta’s mouth was running a mile a minute, nearly bouncing in place.
“Sure! Just let me get ready.”
“Alright! I’ll be waiting for you both in the cafeteria. Shiro said he needed to do some laundry first, so he’ll be down in a bit.” Ryouta nearly started down the hall, but stopped when he saw Sora wrinkle their eyebrows in confusion. “What’s wrong?”
“What’s laundry?”
“Oh, uh…yeah, you have amnesia... Sorry about that. If you have any dirty clothes you can take them to the laundry room on the first floor to clean them. There should be instructions in there if you need them, I’ll let Shiro know you’re headed that way just in case.” Ryouta pulled out his phone, the case covered in stickers of various kinds, before waving to them and heading off towards the cafeteria. 
Sora closed their door, watching as Sal rematerialized above their pillow holding his tome, reading quietly. 
“Master, there should be a clean gym uniform in the top drawer of your dresser if I remember correctly.” Sal turned away from Sora to offer them some privacy to get dressed, which they did. The uniform was too big on them, and also too long. They rolled up their sleeves and pant legs, stretching to make sure the clothes fit comfortably, something they immediately regretted as every muscle in their body ached with pain. 
“Sal, do you want to join us for lunch?” Sora snagged their phone off the windowsill and stuffed it into an inner pocket of their windbreaker. Sal turned to face them once more, closing his tome with a hearty thunk, and smiled.
“No thank you, Master. I plan to spend the rest of the day sleeping, but you three have fun! Oh, and don’t forget the key to your room!” Sal reclined onto their pillow with a smile, before vanishing once more. Sora smiled, finding their room key on their desk and slipping it into their sock before looking around for a way to take their clothes to the laundry room.
As Ryouta had said, when Sora eventually found the cramped laundry room, Shiro was inside, reading. They shifted the pile of laundry in their arms—they had failed to find anything to carry them with and didn’t want to bother Sal again—and knocked on the doorframe. At the new sound, Shiro turned to investigate, and let out a soft sigh when saw them. 
“Good morning, Shiro!” Sora smiled cheerfully, walking in and finding a place to set their laundry down, shuffling some detergent bottles and socks aside first.
“It’s not ‘good morning’ anymore, but thank you all the same,” Shiro said, closing his book and yawning deeply. Sora noticed that it was a beginner’s guide to friendly conversation.
“Did you sleep at all?” they asked, though the dark bags under Shiro’s eyes told them everything they needed to know about how well he had slept. They looked around for the instructions Ryouta had told them about, and began working on their laundry. They may as well get this done while talking, if anything.
Shiro shifted in his seat, letting out another well-timed yawn before responding, “I’ll admit that no, I did not. As class representative, you would think I would be more disciplined since I am to be an example to my classmates, but…” 
“But?” Sora turned to look at the many dials and knobs on what they assumed was the washing machine, and Shiro got up to assist them quietly. After a long pause, Shiro sighed.
“I was…speaking with a friend this morning. I—”
“Oh! Good afternoon, Shiro! And a good afternoon to you as well, Sora!” Moritaka peeked his head into the laundry room, startling the both of them so much that Sora nearly dropped the entire bottle of softener into the barrel. “My deepest apologies, I did not mean to startle you!”
“Afternoon, Moritaka.” Shiro adjusted his glasses, looking away when Moritaka shot him a look of concern at his appearance.
“Good mor…afternoon!” Sora corrected themself, closing the door of the washer and starting the cycle. They noticed Moritaka was wearing a deep blue kimono, a white wave pattern decorating the bottom, “Where are you going?”
“I’m going to train! I start off every day doing this, as it’s a warrior’s duty to train themself on a daily basis. It’s part of the path to becoming a respectable warrior!” Moritaka stood to attention, his voice swelling with pride. “That reminds me, Sora. I was incredibly hurt by both yours and Ryouta’s actions the night prior. Not only did you lie to me, you, by extension, also lied to Mr. Triton. I would like to hear your reasoning for this.”
Sora balked for a moment, unable to think of anything to say. They had no reason to lie to him (this time, at least) but… neither Moritaka nor Shiro knew why they had to lie to Triton in the first place. Would he understand? Would either of them? If he knew what else Sora had caused to happen, would he….
“I…” Sora started, their throat suddenly very, very dry, “You…do you…remember?”
The dawning horror on Sora’s face surprised Moritaka, as it wasn’t the look someone would give you when asked for an apology. “Both you and Ryouta lied to Triton, which gave him the impression I wanted swimming lessons! I can swim very well, thank you!”
Shiro looked between the two, hoping for an explanation of some kind for the issue at hand. However, something else entirely was taking up most of his attention. Moritaka may remember… whatever trouble Sora and Ryouta apparently got him in last night, but not the massive cataclysm that happened the same night. Why? Shiro decided to file away that one for his later meeting with Cain. If anyone could clear up the reasons why, it would be him.
Sora took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, Moritaka. Shiro hadn’t come home yet and I was worried, but Triton and Jinn would have never let me off school grounds at that hour, so Ryouta helped me sneak out so I could find him, but we needed a distraction so we-” the words were spilling out of them like a spigot, a gnawing hole growing in their stomach from a feeling they could not name. He didn’t remember last night, which should have offered comfort to them, but…
“Hold on, Sora,” Moritaka held up his hand, Sora noticing for the first time that his claws weren’t sharp. “I believe I understand what happened now. Your actions were indeed hurtful, however, the lack of faith regarding whether I would assist you in matters regarding a friend is far more wounding. Should another situation such as this arise once more, if you ask, I will help to the best of my ability.”
Sora nodded, bowing in thanks. Moritaka returned the gesture to them and gave one to Shiro before bidding the two farewell. The two stood in relative silence, the tumbling of the washing machine offering a soft, rumbling background noise. The wooden slats that made up the walls of the laundry room offered little protection from the chill of the outside air, which made Sora shiver in their gym uniform, which they now understood wasn’t meant to withstand cold weather.
“What was that all about?” Shiro asked, still staring at the doorway where Moritaka had just been standing.
“Um…I think it’d be better if Ryouta were here too. So we can talk about it at lunch.” Sora turned back towards the washing machine when it chimed, placing their now wet clothes in the drier below.
It took less time than they were expecting for their clothes to finish completely. While the drier was going, Shiro had excused himself, saying he needed to retrieve something from his room, but that he would be waiting for them inside by the entrance to the dorm whenever they were ready to head out.
“Sora, you’re here!” Ryouta practically leapt up from his seat when Sora and Shiro walked in through the cafeteria doors. Sora was wearing their blue jeans, now ripped in places, their white sneakers, a now freshly cleaned and dried winter uniform dress shirt, and Ryouta’s blue wool coat, a pocket of which now held their phone and room key. Better in their pocket than their sock, they reasoned. Shiro himself was wearing a red turtleneck, black slacks, and dress shoes, holding a gray coat over his arm. After Sora and Ryouta exchanged a warm hug, the three sat down at a free table.
Ryouta had assembled quite an array of food for them to eat; a curry bun, egg sandwich,  and orange juice for himself, an anpan, fruit sandwich and strawberry milk for Sora, and alarmingly to Shiro, a chicken katsu sandwich, a salad, an egg sandwich and a UCC black canned coffee sat in front of him.
“Ryouta…is all of this for me?” Shiro didn’t know what to say, turning the gently plastic wrapped Lawson egg sandwich around in his hand as if it were a color he’d never seen before.
“You haven’t eaten since breakfast yesterday, right?” Ryouta raised an eyebrow, taking a bite of his warm curry bun without breaking eye contact. Shiro looked away under his gaze and coughed.
“Ah, is that why I feel completely wretched right now….”
Sora let out a small gasp once they realized that they too hadn’t eaten in quite a long time, beginning to eat their anpan bun in a mild frenzy. Ryouta laughed brightly, the warm sound echoing off the cafeteria walls. Sora began choking. Ryouta cried out in alarm, the shrill sound, again, echoing off the cafeteria walls. Shiro quietly handed them the strawberry milk, and Ryouta sighed in relief as they recovered from the fit. 
“Thank you, Ryouta. I know it must have been a hassle to get everything since the cafeteria is still closed until noon.” Shiro gave a quick thanks for his meal and slowly began eating his food, watching as Sora drank their milk with a sad pout.
“Don’t worry about it! I get a discount at the Lawson across the street since I go there so often.” Ryouta smiled and gave them both a thumbs up.
There weren’t that many students sitting in the cafeteria at this time, breakfast having ended long ago. With the break from school and no classes to attend, many students were either working on their assignments, relaxing, at home with their families, or in the case of a few students, napping.
“Also, um… not to be rude, but you both look kind of awful,” Ryouta commented, glancing between Shiro’s slightly gaunt face and Sora’s many bandages, “So, Shiro, uh… how are you feeling?”
“I’m…” Shiro suddenly felt out of the loop. “I’m doing alright, Ryouta. Why?”
“Well, I mean… you ran off yesterday morning and no one heard anything from you until today, so…” Ryouta took a sip from his orange juice, “...people started spreading rumors that you were running away for good and Sora was sent by the teachers to come and get you.”
“What?”
“You can blame Kibara for that one. And it wasn’t even the strangest rumor getting spread around, either. Tani in Class 2-A said that you got kidnapped by a group planning to use students as child soldiers and were planning an attack on Tokyo,” Ryouta stopped once he saw the look of utter disdain on Shiro’s face. “See what I mean?”
Shiro pinched the space in between his eyebrows and let out a sigh. “Why would he… nevermind. I’ve stopped trying to understand his ramblings.”
“Who’s Tani?” Sora asked, opening up their fruit sandwich to investigate the inside, which was slices of strawberry and fluffy whipped cream.
“Haru Tani,” Shiro let out a disgusted sigh. “He’s an upperclassman of ours that tends to spout conspiracy theories about everything and everyone. It’s a wonder it hasn’t gotten him into trouble yet. Actually… no. The day I start coming to Tani for information is the day I take off my glasses and just start letting Kengo direct me to and fro.”
Ryouta started coughing roughly, having swallowed his food as he gasped. Sora handed him their strawberry milk with a wide-eyed stare. Ryouta took a drink before thanking them, and grimaced, “That’s another problem: no one’s seen Kengo, either. He said he had stuff to do after he did his afternoon training with Moritaka yesterday, and no one’s seen him since.”
Sora looked to Shiro, whose expression was both annoyed and deeply pained. When they first met him, Shiro had been dragging Kengo back to school. Did he do this a lot? Why did Shiro seem so hurt by it, then?
“Shiro?” Sora eventually tugged on his sleeve, which broke him from his thoughts.
“...It’s nothing. I’ll deal with this later, personally,” Shiro adjusted his glasses. “Now, if either of you don’t mind, I’d like to be filled in on what happened while I was… absent. Along with why Moritaka was so upset in the laundry room.”
Half an hour had passed by the time they had finished filling each other in on everything that happened. Sora and Ryouta recounted everything on their side while Shiro was absent, and Sora gave Ryouta the abridged version of what happened while he was at school. How much did they want to tell him? How much could they tell him? 
Ryouta had long since forgotten the curry bun he had been eating, pursing his lips as he processed the sheer gravity of the information given to him. “I… did that… really happen? I died? We all…?”
Shiro closed his eyes solemnly before replying. “Yes. You… and everyone else. We don’t know how, but it did in fact happen. The notion itself is ridiculous, and yet… Sora informed me of what the two of you discovered about Summons. How it does things no phone application could ever be capable of. Were it not for what we’ve both seen… I can say that I honestly wouldn’t believe a word of it. Even now, I find myself wondering if it was all a dream.”
“But…” Sora thought back to the Apparitions they had fought, the nearly flat plane where western Shinjuku used to be, the only thing left of the school being the uprooted plumbing still spewing water… They crumbled a napkin in their clammy hands.
“But it isn’t, is the thing. How?” Ryouta finally looked Shiro in the eyes.
“That’s what I’m going to find out.” That got Sora and Ryouta’s attention, and they sat patiently waiting for him to continue. “Earlier this morning, I contacted a dear friend of mine to ask if he knew anything about Summons. Fortunately, he did, and we arranged to meet later today in Ikebukuro to discuss what we know and exchange information. Hopefully after today we will at least have something concrete to base any further theories on regarding the app.”
“Uh, Shiro, what makes you so sure the information will be good?” Ryouta asked, looking somewhat skeptical.
“It’s simple, really. I trust him.” Catching himself, Shiro amended hurriedly, “T-that is- I- I highly regard his intellect, and—” He cleared his throat. “I trust that if he says he has valuable information regarding this matter, he certainly does know something that could help us better understand what’s going on here.”
“Well, if you trust him, it should be fine,” Ryouta shrugged, then, noticing Sora had been staring off into space, called, “Sora?”
They turned to look at him, as if breaking from a trance. Shiro glanced from Sora to a spot directly in front of them in the air, feeling a familiar pressure wash over him as he stared at the spot, and it clicked instantly as to what, or rather whom, had distracted them.
“Sal wanted me to remind you that only us and Touji remember the cataclysm, because Moritaka never mentioned it,” Sora nervously paraphrased their floating familiar, who had been quietly present from the moment Sora had entered the cafeteria. They paused, “He also says congratulations to you for noticing him again, Shiro.”
“Ah. Thank you?” Shiro didn’t quite know how to reply to Sal’s… enthusiasm.
“Guys, what’s going on?” Ryouta looked between Sora and Shiro for an explanation.
“Oh, yeah, um,” Sora looked to Sal, who gave Ryouta a twirl and a bow, even though he couldn’t see him. “So… I have a contract with a familiar only I can see. His name is Lil’ Salomon, and he’s been helping me ever since I woke up in the park the other day. He knows a lot about Summons too, and he’s willing to help as much as he can if we have any questions.” The triumphant laugh Sal let out at this made Sora break out into a wide grin.
Ryouta was quiet for a moment, before shrugging with an ‘oh, well’ smile. “It’s not the strangest thing you’ve told me today. So… what do we know? Like, all together.”
“The app causes Battle Zones where people fight and can die, but once the battle is over they come back to life. There are two different types of Summoners, one of which summons artifacts, and the other can summon people or creatures.” Sora remembered their encounter with the Watchers the day prior, how surprised they were that Sora could do both. They put that thought aside. ”What else… I guess… Summons is like a game? You can level up in it, and you get things once you finish a battle, but it’s also a messaging app? And you can call people and read their posts and see what their stats are, too.”
“There are also Exceptions, which are caused when two opposing Rules clash and Summons cannot decide which one takes priority over the other, what follows this being…” Shiro didn’t need to finish his sentence. “We’ve also learned that only those involved in the event have any recollection of it in the aftermath. Those who died during this incident were resurrected, with no memory of having died. Ryouta, I remember you mentioning that you use Summons. Did you receive an artifact when you signed up?”
“Yeah, it’s a weird goblet thing? It’s gold and has green leaves on it. I left it in my room since I didn’t know what it was for. Why, Shiro?”
“I’d need more information, but I have a suspicion that the moment you sign up for the app, all users are divided into one of the two categories, whether you fight or not.”
“You can summon the D-Evils though, right? Doesn’t that make you the other type of user as well?” Sora asked, remembering the ████████.
“I’m… not sure. Actually, perhaps we should wait before delving too deep into this. Whatever information I receive today should steer us in the right direction.” Shiro took a glance at a black watch on his wrist. “Speaking of which, I’ll need to head out in about half an hour to make it there on time. If I head out now, I may be able to find Kengo and bring him back in time for the d… the meeting.”
“Is Kengo in Ikebukuro, too?” Sora asked. 
Ryouta nodded in response and leaned back in his chair, finishing the now cold remaining half of his curry bun in one bite. “Probably.” He shivered. “You gotta be careful, Shiro. I heard it’s been getting worse lately.”
“Yes, I’m aware.” Shiro stood from the table, putting his coat on silently. 
“Do you want me to go with you? Just in case?” Sora offered, hesitant to ask Ryouta why he seemed so uncomfortable with the idea of going to Ikebukuro. They couldn’t find the words. 
Shiro considered it for a moment. “...If you wish to, I’d appreciate the company. It may be rather hectic, if I’m being honest, so if you’d rather stay and rest after… everything… I’ll be perfectly fine on my own.”
“You’re not doing well, either, though.” Sora adjusted Ryouta’s coat as they stood, buttoning up the front to keep themself warm. “If anything happens, we’ll at least be together. Are you coming too, Ryouta?”
Ryouta shook his head rapidly. “Nope! No way! You couldn’t get me within ten feet of Ikebukuro. Besides, I have to go help Choji in Daikanyama soon.”
“Why Daikanyama specifically?” Shiro raised an eyebrow, and Ryouta laughed nervously under his gaze.
“Well… I had to pull a lot of favors to find you… so I asked Choji if I could help him out at a church picnic he’s working at today in exchange. I’m gonna be busy until next week helping out down there, actually…” The expression of guilt and Shiro’s fallen shoulders caused Ryouta to gesture for him to hold on. “Don’t worry, Shiro, I like helping out! You got home safe, so it was worth it in the end. Besides, you can make it up to me by bringing something back from Maruju and Iseya Oyama!”
Shiro snorted, smiling at Ryouta’s half-joke. “I’ll consider it. Thank you, Ryouta.”
“Anytime, Shiro. Stay safe you two, alright? I don’t want to end up having to tell Mr. Mononobe that you guys left to go somewhere and then never came back again. Once was enough.” He smiled, though it was closer towards a grimace.
They said their goodbyes, Sora and Ryouta exchanging a tight hug once more before they headed out with Shiro. First, they needed to tell Mononobe where they were going. If he would even let them leave the grounds in the first place. They still had their punishments from the teachers to fulfill. Speaking of which…
“Hey, Shiro, what was it that Jinn was going to make you do as punishment for yesterday?”
“Ah, right, that. He wants me to help him record and catalog the academy’s sports equipment. What about you? What did Triton want?”
“He wants me to help him clean the pool…”
Shiro grimaced. “Ah. My condolences. Kengo’s received that punishment a few times. It goes faster if you ask Triton for help, he gets excited whenever any of his students come to him for something, so his abilities with water stir up the debris and sweep everything to one side of the pool.”
“Why do you know that?” Sora playfully narrowed their eyes, making Shiro look away in embarrassment.
“I may or may not sit and read nearby wherever Kengo has his punishment for the week, so I can keep an eye on him.” Shiro adjusted his glasses, steering the two of them in the direction of Mononobe’s office.
They found him exactly where they expected he would be, sitting at his small cubicle reviewing paperwork, an unlit cigarette in his mouth. Shiro knocked on the door frame, bowing to the other faculty as he and Sora went in. Mononobe looked up at them with a warm but tired smile, the crow’s feet at his eyes scrunching.
“Good afternoon, you two. Did you both sleep well?” Mononobe leaned back in his chair, eyeing Sora curiously. His expression was soft, but thoughtful.
“Yes, sir,” Sora answered meekly. Shiro shot them a dubious glance, but nodded without a word to the contrary.
“That’s good to hear. What can I do for you both?”
“Well, sir, I’d like to ask for your permission for us to leave school grounds for a few hours,” Shiro said, already expecting Mononobe’s suspicious expression before it appeared on his face.
Mononobe closed his eyes, letting out a deep sigh and crossing his arms. Deep creases formed at his brows and around his mouth. “You both are still in a lot of trouble, you know. Lying to the faculty to sneak off school grounds, staying out overnight, disappearing for hours without letting anyone know where you are, not to mention the state you both were in when you returned. Were I to let the both of you leave campus, how can I be sure that you won’t break my trust again? How can I even be sure you’ll return?”
When no reply came, Mononobe cracked an eye open. Shiro was standing tense as a board, a slightly glassy over look in his eyes as he stared into the middle distance. Sora was white-knuckling the bottom of Ryouta’s coat, as if using their entire force of will to keep from bawling on the spot. 
Several seconds passed in this silence. Then Mononobe let out an enormous sigh.
“I’m sorry,” he said wearily, looking between Shiro and Sora as the former struggled to collect himself and the latter struggled not to cry. “I didn’t mean to… upset either of you. But, in case you’ve forgotten, there was a murder nearby here a few days ago, and the investigation is still on-going.” He scrubbed a hand down his face and sighed again. “You could have been arrested yesterday, for all I knew. You could have been killed. I am your teacher and your guardian, and I need you both to understand the gravity of your actions, both for your sake and for mine.”
Sora nodded, relaxing their grip on the coat slowly. Mononobe offered them a tissue box, which they took with a sniffle and dried their eyes. They let out a single shaky hiccup before collecting themself enough to speak. “We understand, Mr. Mononobe.”
He eyed Sora with a mix of emotions they couldn’t name, an expression akin to concern most prominent of them all. He took a deep breath, taking the still unlit cigarette from his mouth and placing it on the edge of an ashtray sitting on his desk. It was a chipped little ceramic thing that looked almost like an antique. The color had faded from it, but it appeared to have been a cheery orange a long, long time ago, with a daisy patterning just barely visible.
“...Alright. You both can go, but under one condition: you have to be back by 18 o’ clock, exactly. Placing my trust in you both is an act of faith that I hope you’ll honor. Do you understand?
Shiro and Sora both nodded their heads, speaking in unison, “Yes, sir.”
“Good. Now, before you both head out, please stick together. The weather may take a turn for the worse, and there’s a chance a blizzard may hit later, so have a backup plan in case you get stranded somewhere. The school still operates with landlines, so if your internet goes out, most convenience stores still have payphones you can use. Be careful, alright?” Mononobe’s advice was quick, making him sound more and more like a worried parent. Sora nodded, Shiro and them bowing before leaving the faculty room. They felt, ever so slightly, Mononobe’s concerned stare on their back as they left.
The train ride over to Ikebukuro was smooth, alarmingly so, compared to everything else that had happened within the last few days. As the two stepped out of the packed train car and onto the Yamanote Line platform of the Ikebukuro Station, Sora was clinging to Shiro like their life depended on it. Shiro put an awkward hand on their shoulder, and shuffled the two of them up a set of stone tile stairs until they reached a long, roofed walkway decorated in advertisement posters, a few restaurants and booths on the right side. 
“Wait here a moment, Sora, I’m going to get us something to drink,” Shiro spoke, watching as Sora stared at the fresh surroundings. He pushed up his glasses and headed towards a drink stand, leaving Sora alone. 
They walked over to a nearby set of windows, the small rectangular panes showing an overhead view of the train platforms outside. The metal roofs reflected the gray sky overhead, frost sparkling on the sheet metal. The chill in the air made them pull Ryouta’s coat around them tighter. They wondered if he would be okay without it, a bit guilty at the idea that they took his only winter coat. Sora gingerly pressed their hand to the glass, pulling it back immediately as they felt how cold it was. Even in the covered walkway, they could see their breath.
“Sorry for making you wait, Sora.” Shiro came back with the drinks, which were hot and steaming. He set them both down on the windowsill. “You have to stay here if you want to drink, it's considered impolite to walk around and eat.”
“Okay!” Sora watched as Shiro slipped two cardboard heat grips around the paper cups. He smiled, a proud grin on his face, though Sora was unsure as to why. 
“One of these is corn soup, it’s an acquired taste, but it’ll warm you up regardless. The other is hot chocolate,” Shiro explained. “It’s sweet, and you can add marshmallows into it for a little more sweetness. Ryouta tends to prefer sweeter things, but recommended I give you the option to try both when we got here.”
Sora stared at the drinks, and picked the corn soup. They blew on it a bit, before bringing it to their lips. It was… they didn’t really have any words to describe it, having never had corn before. Sora continued sipping the yellow, creamy soup with a face that betrayed their confusion and disdain. 
Shiro gave them a bemused smile, taking a drink of the hot chocolate. “How does it taste?”
“Bad…” Sora frowned, but continued nursing the soup, for Shiro’s sake. 
“It is quite… intriguing. You get used to it after a while, believe me, I've had my share far more than I would like.” Shiro turned to the windowsill, and reached for something before pausing. He checked his coat’s pockets, then his pants, then his shirt….
“Shiro?” Sora stared at Shiro with a slightly cocked head.
“No need to worry, I… seem to have forgotten to grab marshmallows.” Shiro took his hands out of his pockets, looking at the drink stand. Sora did a single jump and smiled.
“I’ll go get you some— wah!” The moment Sora turned and ran to the stand, they collided with someone, the two falling to the floor with rather light thuds. The cup that Sora had been holding spun on its lip, empty of its contents. Shiro immediately went to Sora’s side, and helped them sit up, checking them for any injuries.
Sora brushed themself off, and crawled over to the person they had collided with. They wore a baggy purple sweatshirt with large pockets and black cargo pants, both of which were now covered in the corn soup. Sora quickly tried helping the person sit up, panicked, looking like they were about to cry, ”I’m sorry, I didn’t see you! Are you okay? Are you hurt?"
“I-I’m, uh…” The soup-splattered stranger made a few shaky attempts to respond, but couldn’t manage to quite get the words out. It was going to be a long day, especially with how it felt as if the city itself was bad luck. Shiro felt the prickle of suspicion he had die the moment he saw the look on the stranger’s face. If Sora was near tears, they were barely holding the deluge back.
And it seemed like they were losing. The stranger— a child, at least as far as Shiro could tell by their short and wiry stature— began to tremble, shoulders shaking. They had braced themself against Sora when the two had collided, and had grasped their arm as they had tried to help them up. The stranger withdrew into themself, covering their hands over their mouth.
“Are you okay…?” Sora asked again, horrified. The strange child let out a high-pitched sob, their shoulders shaking.
Shiro, panicked, blurted out, “I’ll get you some napkins, one moment.” He made a bee-line back to the drink stand, taking the napkins that were already being offered by the employee manning it. They gave Shiro a raised brow, but were otherwise unconcerned. They also handed some to Sora, who had followed after him, both teens now carrying two large fistfuls of napkins.
When they returned, the crying stranger was nowhere to be seen, the splatter of corn soup marking the now empty space where they should have been.
Sora looked between the splatter and the napkins they held in their hands. “Where did they go?”
Shiro let out a weary sigh. Other people’s crying always made him feel alarmed, and the stranger’s especially left him ill at ease. "They must have run away. They seemed very overwhelmed." He disposed of the empty cup in a nearby recycling area, then crouched on the cool concrete to begin mopping the spilled soup. There was quite a bit around— Sora had an apparent distaste for it. 
Sora was still standing over the mess. Their grip tightened on the cheap napkins. “Sora, are you alright?” Shiro asked, watching them carefully.
"I spilled food on them..." Sora mumbled. "And we didn't help them, they're just gone..."
"Accidents happen, Sora, I don't think they were angry with you." He looked up from his soaked napkins, which at this point were just smearing the wretched soup across the floor rather than cleaning it up. "Would you help me with this? We need to get a..." He trailed off.
Sora was still looking around, their expression no longer stricken with guilt. Instead, they seemed to be listening intently, thin brows knit with discomfort. “Do…you hear that?”
Shiro paused, listening as well. His frown deepened into disapproval when he finally noticed it; someone nearby was laughing. It was cacophonous and full of mischievous joy, the sound slowly getting further and further away down the twisting halls, like they had seen what had happened, and found it the height of comedy. Shiro shook his head, appalled at the lack of sympathy for the child’s misfortune, even if they had most likely been playing hooky.
“Some people are so callous.” He muttered, watching the passersby to locate the culprit, but came back with no one to draw his ire. From the sound of it, the person would have been short of air in their hysterics, but as far as he saw, everyone else on the walkway was too busy giving them a wide berth to spare even a chuckle. This was deeply troubling. Ikebukuro was far too dangerous for someone like that to be out of his line of sight. 
"Sora." Shiro called out to them, his tone gentle, but urgent. "Please help me clean this up. We should leave, as soon as possible." They managed to clean up the mess the best they could, and the employee offered a wet floor sign to place over the cleaned area.
Sora sighed, standing up and throwing the dirty napkins away, the guilt still weighing on them. The two bowed in thanks to the drink stand employee and headed to the right, going through the turnstiles, Sora holding Shiro’s hand tightly. There were a lot of people at this time of day, but far less than the endless crowd in Shinjuku Station. Sora got separated twice in the writhing crowd, having to cling to Shiro like a koala to not have it happen for a third time. 
They left the station’s roofed walkway, taking the Metropolitan Exit, and heading down an open area paved in cold concrete tiles. A red set of pillars lined the walkway to their right, the two passing under them as they turned the corner of the building. The side walkway wasn’t as crowded as the plaza they had just left, Sora letting out a soft noise of awe at the double-decker skybridge they were passing under, the gray sky sparkling in the tinted glass. The pair headed down a few flights of stairs to street level, Shiro checking his phone once they were out of the way of commuters. 
“...Shiro… can I ask you something about Kengo?” Sora muttered, trying to avoid bumping into anyone as they walked.
“I don’t see why not.”
“Ryouta said you had to get Kengo, but… why?” Sora asked, watching Shiro, fully expecting him not to give them an answer.
“He…” Shiro paused for a few moments, as if carefully considering how he phrased his next words. “His parents asked me to keep an eye on him. We’ve known each other since we were kids, and for as long as I can remember, he’s always tended to get into trouble.”
“Why would he come to Ikebukuro?”
Shiro glanced over his shoulder, stopping just in time to avoid an irate cyclist that had ridden out in front of the two. For a moment his expression was one of bewildered annoyance, then his gaze softened with understanding. “Even after hearing what Ryouta said, you…. My apologies. It slipped my mind that merely two days ago you woke up without your memories. Ikebukuro isn’t a safe place. Gang violence, street brawls, and muggings are rampant, with little done to curb the violence. Kengo came here to fight, nothing more.”
The disdain was clear in Shiro’s voice. It was directed at Kengo, but the longer they walked, the longer Sora had to mull over his words. Ever since they got here, to Tokyo, they had been fighting nonstop. The Red Oni in the park, the Watchers outside of the station, the D-Evils, Shiro himself, then the exception… Sora didn’t press any further, the two walking in silence, the sound of the bustling city of fighters surrounding them. 
They didn’t have to search for long before running across Kengo. Sal had been searching from the air to help, and spotted his bomber jacket as he turned a corner into a narrow commercial side street. The two dodged and swerved through the pedestrian crowds, until the swarm of humanity all but vanished as they came upon the scene in front of them.
The rough thwacks and crunches of fists against bodies echoed off the two-story restaurants on either side of the street. Sora tensed in horror as they watched the fight, the… brawl. There was no other word for it. This wasn’t in Summons, this was real, tangible. The blood on Kengo’s fists were a testament to that. 
“C’mon, guys, let’s go!” One of the guys fighting Kengo crawled away, cradling his broken arm. There was barely enough room in the street— more of an alley, really— for a small vehicle to drive through, so the fighters had no choice but to be close-quarters.
“So that was all talk?! What’s the matter, you scared?” Kengo dodged an incoming attack, grabbing them by the arm as they swung, and flipped them over onto their back in a beautiful arc. They landed on the bloodied pavement with a loud crack. Sora shuddered. 
Shiro’s fist clenched as he watched, and the disdain on his face soured into outright contempt. Sora didn’t want to butt in; usually they would have, they’d jumped into fights before, but Shiro… what would he think of them afterwards?
The other fighters crawled away the best they could with injured bodies, some limping away from Kengo weakly. He spit out a glob of blood on the asphalt, wiping his mouth with his hand.
“You’re pathetic. Get lost, you’re not worth my time.” Kengo scowled, wiping his grisly hands on his jeans before putting them in his pockets. The group that attacked him collected their injured friends and hobbled away. Those that had fallen unconscious were left behind in the alley.
Sora took a step forward as they made to talk to Kengo, but Shiro beat them to it, his voice stern, anger barely contained: “What do you think you’re doing?”
Kengo turned quickly, startled more than anything else  to see Shiro, and Sora for that matter, as they saw his deep brown eyes flick to them for a moment.
“What the hell are you doing here, Shiro?” Kengo asked, his tone just as angry.
“We’ve come to get you,” Sora answered first, shutting their mouth immediately when they saw the stern glare Shiro was giving them. He wanted to handle this. Alone.
“Every time I come and get you, you’re in another fight! It’s a wonder you haven’t killed anyone yet!” Shiro said, his voice raising in volume. Kengo rolled his eyes, and walked over to one of the unconscious fighters. Sora gasped softly as Kengo began checking their pockets, eventually pulling a small, black leather wallet. He took out some small tokens that Sora knew to be Coin along with a few bills that Sora did not recognize, shoving them unceremoniously into the pocket of his worn jeans.
“You’re robbing them now, too?!” Shiro shrieked.
“Shut up, I earned this fair and square!” Kengo snapped back, staring Shiro down. Sora squirmed in place, holding tightly onto the bottom of their coat. Something bad was going to happen. ”The better I am at kicking their sorry asses, the more I get. Same goes for them. It’s that simple.”
Shiro’s face momentarily fell into stunned alarm, before returning to the grimace he had prior. “Kengo, is this illegal fighting? Have you been fighting people for money?!”
Kengo didn’t respond. At least, not at first. The rush of the highway nearby filled the silence, and after what felt like an eternity, he answered, cold and strained, “Go home, Shiro. I don’t care what happens at school anymore, and I’m sick of your annoying ass trailing after me everywhere I go.”
Shiro started. “What—”
“Just— shut up! What am I even going to school for? If you wanna go to kiss-ass central, then go ahead, but I don’t— I don’t care! I’m sick of you dragging me to school when I don’t care about that shit, and then dragging me to study so you can tell me how stupid I am and how ‘I’m not applying myself’ and ‘I’m disappointing my father’ like I give a rat’s ass about how that old man feels!” Kengo’s voice was hoarse from yelling, his harsh words and frustrations bleeding from him like an open wound. “You can go back to the academy and tell them anything you want, because you know what? I don’t belong there! It doesn’t matter what you or any of them do— I can’t ‘walk the straight and narrow,’ I can’t get good grades, and I’m never gonna hold down a job where you sit in a cubicle all day. I’m a martial artist. This is where people like me belong!”
Sora watched as Kengo spat at Shiro, and turned to leave. They didn’t have the courage to chase after him. Shiro did. He marched towards Kengo, grabbing onto his jacket sleeve, the old, brown leather gripped tightly in his fingers. Kengo flinched, and his arm jerked out of reflex, shaking Shiro free. The two made eye contact, looking for something in each other that was no longer there. Kengo grit his teeth, and swung. 
Shiro staggered back; he fell to the ground hard. He placed a hand on his jaw, as if trying to stifle the pain that had settled in. Kengo stared down at him, his hands shaking. 
That was the final straw. Sora lunged at Kengo with enough ferocity that he was caught off guard. They started to claw at his face, their small hands leaving sharp fingernail scratches anywhere they could reach. Kengo grabbed Sora by the back of their coat and threw them at Shiro with a thud.
“Both of you just stay the hell away from me!” Kengo shouted, running off down the back alley, and eventually out of sight.
The alley was quiet once more, the onlookers from the nearby restaurants that had watched the confrontation murmuring amongst themselves. Shiro sat up slowly, still staring in the direction Kengo had gone. Sora crawled out of Shiro’s lap, dusting themself off. They looked at their hand, which had landed in a pool of dried blood, the crust still somewhat damp. It took everything to keep down their rising bile from the feeling of it. Sora quickly got up, and started looking for Shiro’s glasses, and found they had skittered under a set of chained delivery bicycles. Shiro hadn’t moved by the time they brought them back, too stunned to do much else but gape in blank horror.
“...He’s not a bad person, you know.” Shiro’s voice was barely audible, nothing more than a strangled whisper. ”Deep down, I mean. He’s good, he… hesitated. He didn’t swing immediately. He didn’t… want to, maybe he did, I mean… Sora you have to believe me, Kengo’s a good person—”
“I know,” Sora said, sitting down on the asphalt beside Shiro quietly. They sat there in silence for a while before speaking up again. ”Let’s go, Shiro,”
“...Yes. Let’s go. We still have things to do, after all,” Shiro’s response was flat and mechanical. He stood, his poker face returning as he adjusted his coat. “That fool… if he wants to beat people up in back alleys for money, so be it. It’s not like he’ll change if I drag him back, anyway.”
The jarring shift in Shiro’s sentiments took Sora by surprise. Had he not heard a single thing Kengo had said? They held their tongue, not having the words to express their frustrations with Shiro at the moment. Sal floated down, giving them a look of concern.
“Master, you’re worried, right?” Sal asked, floating alongside Sora as they followed Shiro to wherever he was going. This time, they gave him a wide berth.
“Yeah. I don’t… understand.” Sora rubbed their arm as they watched the blue-gray asphalt underfoot, “Kengo’s mad at Shiro, but he won’t listen. They won’t listen to each other,”
“From what I’ve seen, Master, they’re stubborn people. It’s all part of growing up, y’know. Friends have disagreements sometimes, after all.” Sal steered Sora around an upcoming corner as they headed back out the way they came, eventually stopping in front of a Lawson convenience store. Shiro turned to Sora silently, waiting for them to follow inside, but they shook their head half-heartedly. Shiro went in alone.
Sora sat down on the small red steps to the left of the door, watching the midday traffic drive by. The sky had darkened even more than earlier, and their fingers had started to ache from the deepening cold. They were reminded of… a few days ago. Had it really only been so little time? Sal floated down into their lap, opening his tome to different pages as he read.
“Sal… do you have any friends?”
“Hm… well, there’s you, Master. Father as well, and that’s about it. Not many people can see me after all! Why?”
“Will things work out?” Sora asked, as the familiar tightness in their chest that meant they were going to cry welled up inside of them.
“...I don’t know, Master. That’s up to them. The most you can do is to have faith, and that’s the strongest power one can have in this Tokyo,” Sal responded, his large brown eyes looking up at Sora in reassurance. It worked, somewhat, as Sora took a few strangled breaths to collect themself.
Shiro stepped out of the automatic doors to the Lawson, a small plastic bag full to the brim on his arm. Sora looked up at him with a complicated expression, watching as he placed a heat compress to the growing red spot on his jaw. They took his hand to help them up, Sal flying around the two of them.
“Are you feeling alright, Sora?” Shiro asked, handing them a small bottle of Yakult. Sora nodded, peeling the bright red foil lid off of the bottle, tentatively sipping the yogurt drink inside. It was cold, which might not have been the best thing for the current temperature, but the subtle sweetness of the yogurt drink made them feel better. 
Shiro sighed, grabbed one for himself, and reclined against the concrete wall to Sora’s right. “You always seem to catch me at my worst, Sora. I’m the one the staff rely on as class representative to keep my classmates in line. It’s imperative I maintain my cool to keep performing that job to the highest caliber, yet here I am, running away from school for over 24 hours and getting into fights two days in a row.”
“...Shouldn’t we go after Kengo?” Sora asked, glancing over at Sal, who was trying to take a sip from their bottle. They tilted it slightly to give him easier access.
“We should, however-” Shiro punctuated his sentence by downing his yogurt in a single gulp, “-what just transpired may happen again, if not worse than before. That’s a chance I’m not willing to take, and frankly, we’re running out of time for our meeting. Kengo will be back to normal after he cools off, and I doubt he’ll be leaving Ikebukuro.”
Shiro pulled out his phone from his coat pocket, checked the time, a chatroom, then SUMMONS, and sighed in frustration. Three D-Evils of various bright colors, one Wood, one Nether, and one Aether, appeared from circular portals in the air, chirping happily. Sora’s jaw clenched at the sight of the portals. They glowed with swampy green and blood red rings that twisted into the center like optical illusions. The same portals that had dotted the night sky of Shinjuku as they sucked up people like dust barely twelve hours prior.
“D-Evils, I’m not sure if you’re able to assist me in this manner, but I want you to find Kengo and keep an eye on him while we’re busy. Can you do that for me?” Shiro asked, in a tone similar to how one would speak to a pet. The D-Evils squeaked amongst themselves, before the Nether D-Evil, who was the leader of the trio, nodded. The three fluttered their stubby wings, and flew off down the street in different directions to search.
Sora fidgeted with the bottom of their coat. “Is it…safe to use that?”
“What do you mean?”
“The… thing…” Sora stared at Shiro. “What if the book calls it back? What if we have to fight it again?”
As Shiro looked back, trying to understand their meaning, his hand slid absentmindedly down the leather spine of the Necronomicon, which resided comfortably in a holster on his thigh. “...I remember. No, I don’t believe that would be the case. The officer said that it was Summoned when our Rules collided. I doubt simply using the book would have the same effect.”
“Sure…” Sora mumbled, still not entirely reassured. Still, the D-Evils would be useful in this situation, as they would be less conspicuous than if either of them were to trail Kengo.
“Now, we have a good amount of time before our meeting, but I’d like to get to the station sooner rather than later, just in case anything else happens, as that’s where we agreed to meet. I recommend we get a move on as soon as possible.” Shiro switched back to the SUMMONS home screen, providing him with a map of the area. 
The two hurried at an even pace down the brick-laid sidewalk, through a small crosswalk, and then back up the opposite street. They walked along the side of an impressively long, several story building, with spiral concrete stairs leading up to higher floors, various Roman-style columns, and large vertical banners with badly photoshopped pictures of gladiators on them hanging from the roof. There was an impressive amount of people going in and out, a few shoving past Shiro as they passed another set of stairs.
They had just passed the corner of the imposing building when the Aether D-Evil from earlier barreled into Shiro out of nowhere, hitting him square in the stomach. Shiro let out a surprised, winded cough, taking a step back from the force of the impact. The D-Evil chattered loudly, tugging at his clothing.
“What’s wrong with it?” Sora asked as they watched Shiro put his phone back in his pocket, and lifted the D-Evil under its arms like a cat. It wiggled its little limbs and pointed off to the right of where the two stood. The light brown brickwork pathway they had been walking over branched off through a row of trees towards another entrance of the building. There was a large crowd gathered at the end of it.
“Did you find Kengo?” The D-Evil nodded with a beep. “Is he over there?”
The other two D-Evils floated in, one landing on Shiro’s shoulder, the other perched on his head. The trio let out a shrill, urgent squeak, Sora and Sal wincing at the volume.
“Calm down, don’t make so much noise,” Shiro chided, and looked towards where they had pointed. He looked back towards the station a block away, then to a nearby park clock silently. Eventually, Shiro turned to Sora. “...I doubt my friend would mind if we were a little late, as much as the prospect bothers me. What do you think? Should we investigate?”
Sora approved, the two beelining for the crowd. As they approached, they saw the tell-tale blue wall that signified a Battle Zone sparkling above the thrumming crowd. The Wood-aligned D-Evil smacked Shiro’s arm insistently, pointing with its clawed hand towards the row of glass double doors that acted as the front entrance.
“He’s inside there?” Sora asked, the D-Evil flapping its arms in confirmation.
Shiro narrowed his eyes, “This is the Tokyo Metropolitan Theatre, where they hold plays and art exhibits. What business would he have in there—”
His voice was lost when the crowd of spectators cheered all at once. An energy spread through the mass of people, one so electrified and strange that it made the hair on Sora’s arms stand on end. The Battle Zone quickly dissipated, the familiar voice of the narrator calling out the results of the fight.
「Battle concluded. 
Winner: Snow of the Ikebukuro Berserkers. 
Congratulations. Thank you for playing SUMMONS」
The crowd broke apart, each person headed to their original destinations, and finally granted the two a clear view of the fight that had transpired. A man lay face down on the brickwork ground, the pattern below him resembling a ripple that started from the entrance of the apparent theater building. The man was mangled, covered in cuts and scrapes that precisely targeted his limbs’ weak points. Standing a few feet behind the injured man, poised and refined, was a beautiful lion transient with blue-white fur, whose well-groomed white mane ended dark green. He wore an elegant dark blue, almost black, butler uniform, one that was embroidered with traditional Tibetan designs decorating the lapels of his coat and vest. He readjusted his clean white gloves and golden monocle. It looked as if he hadn’t suffered a single scratch the entire fight. 
Sora quickly ran to the injured man’s side, watching the wounds on his body heal as the post-battle effects of SUMMONS activated. He lifted his head, looking up at Sora, who had a hand on his shoulder. They recognized him as one of the people Kengo had been fighting earlier.
“Do you need help? Are you alright—” Before Sora could ask further, the man weakly slapped away their hand.
“Get the hell away from me! You and your jackass buddy can’t get enough, huh? You finishing the job he started?!” The man spat, and sat up to face the white lion that had won the battle, apparently named Snow. “Damn cat, you and your weirdass moves!”
Snow let out a short chuckle, seemingly unfazed by the injured man’s outburst. “Now, now, I can’t have you making a commotion at the entrance, lest people think our estate unrefined. I regret I must ask you to leave, if you would be so kind.”
The man scooted back in fear as Snow took a step forward, his eyes trained on the man’s every move. For a brief moment, Sora felt his gaze fall upon them, and they moved aside to let him pass. They crunched a leaf tightly in their hand as they saw the frantic look on the injured man’s face as his attacker descended upon him. 
“You just caught me off guard!” The man yelled, bravado filling his voice. “I want in that building, cat, and you’re not going to stop me!”
“Goodness, I had thought our name was more widely known around Ikebukuro. To think our establishment would attract such a haphazard attacker such as yourself.” Step. “Furthermore, one who assumes he will be let in just for the sake of a few coin…” Step. “I am ashamed to admit I have much to improve upon. The quality of an estate’s guests deems the quality of the estate’s butler, after all. At this rate, I dare not face my darling master.”
The man kept scooting back, a cry of alarm leaving him when his back hit a nearby tree. Snow turned his nose up in disgust at the display. Shiro backed away from where he was standing, the D-Evils squeaking as well.
“How unsightly. One who cannot ascertain his opponent’s strength is inferior to a wild beast. One mustn’t confuse a penchant for reckless endangerment for actual courage.” Snow posed elegantly, his left hand beginning to glow a soft bluish-green. “I will show no mercy to those who show no courtesy.”
Snow’s body blurred for a moment, and without any indication of what had occurred, the man slumped over, falling to the ground. Sora gasped, and hesitantly approached to check the man. He was unconscious, a look of surprise on his face. Shiro quickly lifted Sora up, the two now on guard against the strange butler. Snow lowered his hand, and placed it behind his back, once again elegant and composed.
“You must excuse me, I fear that may have been rather unbecoming. You may refer to me as Snow, young ones.” The butler, now assuredly named Snow, addressed the two of them, his voice deep with an air of politeness. For a moment, Sora forgot about the unmoving man at his feet. “Now then, how may I assist you?”
“W-We’re, uh… we—”
“We’re looking for our friend. We heard that he went into that building.” Shiro cut Sora off, which made them huff. 
“I see. Very well, your purpose has been noted. However, I regret to inform you that only my master’s guests are allowed inside. Were I to speak carelessly of the happenings within our domain, it would reflect poorly on my position as manager of the colosseum.”
Shiro’s eyebrows knit in confusion. “Colosseum? I thought this was a theater.”
“I have heard that, at one point, in the earlier years of this Tokyo and prior, that it was indeed a theatre of the arts. However, my master has refurbished it into its current incarnation. Only the strongest may be allowed to pass through its threshold. That is one of the rules set in place by my master.” Snow smiled, the admiration of his master obvious in his voice.
Sora spoke up nervously. “What’s a coliseum?” After the look of utter bewilderment Snow gave them, they wish they hadn’t. Shiro answered first, thankfully. 
“Traditionally, the word just indicates a stadium or amphitheater, however, it has become associated specifically with the famous gladiatorial arena in Rome of the same name.” Shiro’s drawn-out answer was confirmed with a nod from Snow.
“A very astute and well-articulated response. The place is of a similar concept, however, I must ask that you both leave regardless. You are not welcome within its walls or the premises there-of.” Snow’s tone retained its politeness, which was beginning to sound a bit deadpan.
“Please, our friend is in there. We need to take him back to campus.” Shiro dug his heels in, but it didn’t matter. 
“No, and that is my final answer. Should you press further, I will personally remove the two of you, by force if need be.” This was bad. Sora could feel something beginning to radiate from Snow, and they were reminded of their fight with the Red Oni.
Bloodlust.
They had to do something, and fast. Sora steeled themself, going with the only option left: the nuclear one. “What if we proved we were strong?” Sora saw Shiro’s head snap towards them. “Would you let us in, then?”
Snow scoffed. “I see! Yes, you would certainly be recognized that way, but that still would not be enough. You must also possess a formal introduction or recommendation by a current or former gladiator recognized within our walls. There are no exceptions.”
Sora gripped the sleeve of Shiro’s coat, not breaking eye contact with the beautiful Snow, who towered over the two. They could feel Shiro shaking in fear. “I-If you’re… if you’re going to stop us, we have to—I mean—we’re going to go through you!’
“Are you? Even with your companion’s shaking legs? Now, if you were indeed able to subdue me, that would be very interesting.” Snow began to stalk around them, his long, white tail stiff as it hung just above the stone bricks. “I find that implausible. Your power and skill mean nothing if you lack the courage to use them. This lack of nerve will be your downfall.”
Sora and Shiro turned to face Snow, who was now behind them. The three D-Evils hissed at his presence, but it did not faze the old lion, who leaned down to meet Shiro eye to eye. “Cowards such as yourself should tuck their tail between their legs and endeavor to never show their faces here again. Now, if you will excuse me.” Snow stood up straight and walked past Shiro, whose shoulders slumped, defeated. Sora turned around to look at the butler, who walked towards the entrance of the theater. They couldn’t let that stand.
“Shiro, don’t listen to him!” Sora grabbed his hand gently, interlocking their fingers.”We were able to go against the exception and win, we can do this if we work together! Then we can get Kengo and go home.”
Shiro looked up at them, a thoughtful look on his face. He nodded, and they braced themselves, hand in hand. 
「Sora Watanabe, Guildless, and Shiro Motoori, Guildless
challenge Snow of the Ikebukuro Berserkers, to a battle」
At the sound of the announcer’s voice, Snow stopped mid-stride. He took his hands out of their folded position they were in, and faced the two scared—but determined—teenagers. “Ah, so it appears you respond to taunts.” Snow raised his hands, and three chakrams floated up behind him, spinning slowly in the air. “Let us determine whether your response is as courageous as you think it is.”
The shimmering walls of the Battle Zone encircled the three in a spiraling wave, trapping them within. Onlookers nearby rushed over quickly to see what was going on, or to simply see what they knew would be inevitable carnage.
Shiro pulled the Necronomicon out from its holster, staring Snow down with a look of unease. The pages of the ominous book began to flutter once more with an unseen wind. Just as Shiro turned his head to speak to Sora, he vanished. He and Snow were… gone. The loud crack of shattering stone behind Sora sent a shiver down their spine. They ducked just in time to miss the gloved swipe of Snow’s hand, barely a centimeter away from their head. They landed on the ground, staring up at Snow in abject terror. Shiro was lying face down in a small crater, unmoving.
“Very impressive that you managed to dodge my first attack.” Snow smiled and adjusted his glove. Sora held tight to Boundless Tail, with the realization of how skewed the battle was creeping in. Snow gave them a moment to get to their feet, and began to attack once more.
The chakrams flew at Sora, so fast they looked like smears, a deep, rumbling hum surrounding them on all sides. They dove in time to dodge one, but the other two got their arm, leaving a deep gash. They screamed. Their arm fell limp at their side.
“Ah! No!” Sora cried, stumbling back in time to miss another chakram. They swung their sword a few times, trying to knock the chakrams out of the air, but right before they connected, the chakrams would move. A few more attacks, and their legs had been shredded with thin cuts, their pants slowly dyeing red from the blood. 
Sora watched Snow, confused. Everyone usually attacked them directly, and he took out Shiro without any issues… So why hadn’t he done the same for them? The old lion stood near the edge of the Battle Zone, stepping to and fro like a dance, the chakrams mimicking his movements. If they wanted to stop the chakrams, they needed to go for the source.
 As they stood, Snow stopped, and took out a silver pocket watch from one of his coat pockets. He sighed. “Oh dear, how careless of me to become so engrossed in this event. At this rate, I’ll be late for my next engagement.”
Now was their chance. Sora bolted for Snow, sword ready. The pocket watch clicked shut. Just as the chakram went for their legs, they dove over it, using their momentum to roll. With as much force as they could muster, they swung for Snow. It grazed his calf as he leapt out of the way, landing elegantly nearby.
“Outstanding!” Snow looked at the ripped fabric of his slack, and beamed, though his smile felt… strange. “You have a significant amount of potential. Were it not for my previous engagement, I would take the time to isolate that potential. As such, I will leave you with this.”
Sora had barely blinked before they felt their head connect with the hard bricks. They screamed, Snow pinning their bad arm to the ground with his foot, putting pressure on the wound. “You fight with tenacity, but you lack motivation; you fight out of necessity and it makes you sloppy. Much like that laggard earlier, you and your companion foolishly challenged someone far out of your league in both skill and power without any idea of what you were getting into. Potential or not, you’re careless.”
They watched as Snow raised his arms once more, the three chakrams reuniting behind him. They began to circle behind his head, spinning faster and faster. A deep, echoing hum filled the air. Sora watched as an image formed in the paths of the chakrams, a mandala, intricate and colored with beautifully vibrant reds, blues, greens, and yellows. They whimpered weakly, tears pouring down their cheeks from sheer agony. The mandala started to turn.
Snow raised his voice, and their golden eyes widened. “Role of the Vassal! Rule of Trinity! Spin, whirl, and dance! Course unending through the circle of reincarnation and soar beyond even the lofty summit of Amne Machin! Physical, ethereal, and astral bodies unite as one with threefold power. Rise now, Ashtamangala!” 
The three chakrams hit them, and for a moment, they felt no pain. They floated in unfeeling existence for what felt like minutes. Then, like a great wave, they were aware of everything. Their senses folded in on themselves, shifting and becoming something new. They no longer were just a singularity, but a mass, an ever existing being of many faces, all crying out for an end that would never come. Sora heard, deep within the all of their being, a girl called out for her father, before the voice was swallowed by coils of light. 
Then, they felt everything go still. 
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pbandjesse · 7 months ago
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I know I say a lot of the time how bad my allergies are but they are particularly bad today. And it sucks because I was doing so good all day! But for the last 6 hours I have felt like I was dying. I can't breathe properly. My eyes burn. I keep closing the one completely because it hurts to open. I am so uncomfortable.
But today wasn't even bad. I had a really good morning. I slept alright. Falling asleep pretty quickly. And after having sort of a rough time because I was so sore and exhausted from work, it was nice to be able to sleep easy.
I remember James leaving for work. Giving me a kiss. And then I actually woke up at. 8. An hour before my alarm. And I felt good. That was really nice.
I took a little time to just lay in bed and get up slowly. But then I was awake and had energy and I didn't want to waste it.
I went and got dressed. I felt so cute and good about myself. I was in a great head space. I went downstairs and James had made really good cornbread so I had that for breakfast. And headed upstairs to start working on my tasks.
I decided I wanted to reorganize the way our bedroom is laid out. While I feel like the way we had it for the last two months has been nice, I felt like since I was taking off the closet doors I could actually try different layouts. And just play with the space.
I had to start with organizing though. I went through the closet after taking off the doors. Taking everything that was on hangers and putting it on the bed. I took out the IKEA shelf that I keep shoes on and decided that I would clear out one of the drawers under the bed for shoe storage. And then move the shelf to the small room. This worked out really good.
In making a drawer open for the shoes I had to move all my sweaters. And since it's going to be warm I just took all but a handful of my sweaters to put in a storage bag.
I would then organize our pajamas drawer, giving us both our own. I was on a roll.
I then felt like everything was in a good place and could start moving the bed. I should have thought slightly more about logistics because I did not consider that the room is narrow and the desk should have been moved out of the room.
Plus the carpet makes it incredibly difficult to move the bed. So I would throw all of the bedding into the hallway and took the drawers out and eventually took the mattress off completely.
As I was slowly sliding the bed I ran into some problems. When the bottom of the frame just started falling apart. I cracked it in spaces and I was getting very very frustrated. I kept trying to move the desk and eventually just disassemble the bottom half of the end and moving it went fine after that. But it was touch and go for a while.
I was a few hours into this project. Moving stuff around. Because of how I had put things in the hall I was kind of trapped until I got it all put away. So I just focused and did what had to be done.
I spent some time putting the bed back together. This would seem to be going well. And I loved how it looked. There is so much space!! I'm thrilled. And it was so fun resetting up my desk in the opposite corner and moving some art around. And once we have the wallpaper up I have some of the art I took down to hang back up. It was very exciting.
I would take a little lunch break. I had a Celeste pizza which was fine. I ate it on the new open floor space and was doing good. Once I finished hanging my necklaces back up I would move to the small guest room to work in there.
I would take two of the three storage bags we have and used one for pillows and one for blankets. I would then go through and actually fold all of my sweaters and sweatshirts to go in the last bag. It was really nice to get everything out away.
I remade the bed in there. And decorated the shelf formally from my closet. And it looks so good there so I'm thrilled.
I would sort the laundry and when that was done I went to have another snack. I had nachos and dips and was having a really nice day. I was listening to a long video and just going. I would jump into packing next.
And this was excellent. I got all my clothes nearly packed and am very happy with it. And our visas got approved so that was very exciting. It's almost time for our trip!! One week to go!
I felt like it was at a good stopping place. There was more I could do but I didn't need to at that moment. I had moved all of our chargers and things seemed good. So I would lay down and try to nap for an hour before James came home.
This did not go well. Almost as soon as I got in the bed the slats collapsed and then the bottom of the bedframe fell apart again. I was very disoriented and confused and couldn't get it and was in the mind of sleep time and was not having fun!!! I texted James and they were like. We will fix it it is okay.
So I went to the living room to try and lay down but this did not let me sleep. The wind outside was to loud. But I rested and tried to be positive.
Around 430 I got a second wind and went to tackle the bed. And I did. It isn't perfect. But it was back together. I put new hardware and longer screws. It's not completely fit together in one spot but I think it'll hold. I couldn't get the slats by myself though so that would have to wait for James.
When James got home they had to run to do a thing online real quick but then would come back and help me finish the bed. We remade it together after and we just sat together so I could tell them all the thing I did and then they told me about their day. They laughed at me for moving all the furniture by myself. But they also understand why I do it. Made me feel seen.
I requested we go through the packing inventory I made and we could check things off that I had packed. And this was extra fun for me and there are a handful of things to still pack. Like my tablet and makeup. But overall it's done and that feels really good. I am very excited to travel. Even if 20 hours of flight is scary.
James would make us breakfast for dinner and it was so good. Just excellent hash browns and an omelette. But during this time my allergies were getting worse and worse. And I was feeling very weak and bad.
The food helped. But even with multiple allergy meds I still was struggling to breathe. Eventually the sun went down, after laying together watching TikToks for a while, I decided to take a bath. And that is where I am now. And I think I'm slightly better. I can open both eyes now. But I am very ready to go and lay down.
Tomorrow I have some tasks to do for my outside commitments. The market I'm doing next weekend and my workshop series. And then I'm heading to the museum towards the end of the day to make some print examples. It is supposed to be warm tomorrow and I am excited about that.
I hope you all have a really good night. And sleep well. I hope you don't have allergies. Good night everyone!
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Hi, I have hard executive dysfunctions but had some (temporary) results using to-do apps and stuff. For everything, brushing teeth, eating, etc. But it always end (very quickly) by me adding 30+ to dos for a day and working 10 hours to get them done until I break down. I can't not do it. Once I think about it, there is sooo much to do, so much I neglected.
So I saw this nice bullet journal in a shop today and took it with me and need some ideas how to make it, to not end like the others:
I thought about a symptom part, how good did I sleep, what mental health issues do I have, etc pp.
I am completely unsure if I should ad any "chore to-dos" or only self care/mental health ones. But even those feel like chores so...
And my energy level varies strongly so I thought about keeping it vague like idk "do one relaxing thing"-like maybe. So I could decide on that day, what I think I will get done. But that's pretty unsatifying.
Ah and, as much as I love such book and diaries etc, writing it down feels like a chore too so... It sounds worse than it is, I had some results but everything in this world sounds like a chore so I am unsure how to make this fun and manageable and neither go to the extreme nor give up.
Give me all your ideas and examples and plans.
Hi anon,
As soon as I saw your ask I just knew I wanted to answer it ~ I have ADHD, but because of other chronic health issues - I cannot take stimulant medications for it and rely on my adaptations to manage symptoms (and yup, some of my mental energy does get used up doing it this way - but it is possible for some of us!). I wanted to start by sharing some resource links and articles first:
The Best Work Schedule for ADHD Brains: Flexible or Rigid? (with resources at the end, and lots of reflections from a variety of folks who benefit from both - great starting point to see which style resonates with you)
Adults With Executive Function Disorder (scroll about halfway down for tips and resources)
Tips and Tricks for Executive Function Disorder (geared towards the caretaker of a child with it, but still impactful suggestions, including movement breaks and reward systems)
Executive Function Disorder: Bullet Journal (one person’s personal bullet journal and how an adaptable reward system - shaped like a bingo card - really helped them) 
But also wanted to share what I use/tell myself throughout the day/week to help: (under the cut to help avoid the post getting super long)
I personally use an adapted planner for the overall schedule, it’s got enough blank spaces where if I want to “change it up” I can do that week to week, but in general this is the place where I store my overall monthly calendar and every Sunday night write out my week ahead of “big things” (apps, time sensitive errands, etc).  
I take a picture of my monthly calendar, as well as my weekly so even if I’m out and about I can quickly refer to it if someone asks about a date - versus saying “I’ll check my calendar later and get back to you” . . . and then - never doing it, whoops!
People in my life are used to it by now, but essentially if someone tells me something like “next weekend is so and so’s birthday” - I’ll take a moment to set an alarm reminder to add it to my calendar when I’m home, and or make a text message note on my phone, and set an alarm that essentially reads “don’t forget to add your text notes to the calendar” (some days I can have like fifteen alarms going off throughout the day, but this way I also manage to add the information I need to, versus feeling like I’m constantly forgetting something, or worse, expending limited mental energy constantly cycling through a “don’t forget don’t forget don’t forget” concentration).
I timeblock my day every morning before everyone else is awake, for example: 7 to 8 - studies, 9 to 10 - social, and so on.  By doing it every day, I can refer back to it throughout the day and adjust as needed but also not plan too far ahead with no adaptability to changing circumstances.  I also ensure that for a chunk of “serious chores” I also schedule in what I like to call “serotonin boosts” - whether that’s some friends time, or creative time, whatever sparks joy for you.  There have definitely been days where I felt like I could not do one more email - and then reminded myself that as soon as I got through the five I scheduled myself for, then I could draw for an hour (a basic ‘this, then that’ reward system).  Suddenly, I manage to push through it, and often quicker than I had originally thought it would take - allowing me to have even more time with something that brings joy.
If I have to be somewhere at a certain time, I set several alarms, almost like a countdown 
I like to use fun color pens, or even pens with like fuzzy balls, or some other sort of stimming part to it as I work - it allows me a moment to stim if I need it, even when I’m tackling the “boring brain dump” stuff.
No amount of telling my brain “just do it” for twenty minutes is going to magically create the dopamine/serotonin it needs to do the thing.  So if a reward isn’t working, I get up and move with a timer to get it going that way, and then try again.
I’m sure there’s plenty more ideas/tips/tricks - anyone stumbling on this, please feel free to comment, reblog, and add to it, but I hope it’s a helpful start for you and anyone else out there looking for adaptions. - Mod Kat
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lithesunflower · 1 year ago
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Fragile Strength Part 12
Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6 Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 11
Spider
The morning light that fluttered through the windows of the science lab was slightly murky. The lab hadn’t been cleaned on the outside in quite awhile, despite it’s immaculate interior. 
Spider’s eyes opened and he groaned slightly at the light. He moved a bit looking down to find Anya curled up on his chest breathing softly. He could tell she had stayed up for awhile watching over him, she was still in a pretty deep sleep. He sighed softly and watched her for a moment. 
How had she known to come looking for him? How had she known what to do to help him? She continued to amaze him the longer he knew her. The golden glow about her still made him question if the sunlight really just hit her constantly or if she glowed from within somehow. 
Part of him knew he was going to have to explain his hands to the others and he wasn't looking forward to that. He also knew he would likely have to explain to Anya what had happened the day before but he honestly didn't even know how to put into words what he had experienced. He wished for a moment that he could just will himself back to sleep so he wouldn't have to deal with any of it but he could feel his energy already building up. It was taking everything in him not to shake Anya awake and ask her to go for a walk with him. 
Thankfully he didn’t have to wait much longer for the girl to notice the shift in his heartbeat. The change to the rhythm against her ear made her stretch and turn to look up at him. Her blonde hair fell gracefully down her back except for a few strands that had somehow tangled over her forehead. Spider chuckled softly as he pushed the flyaway strands away from her face with his good hand and Anya gave him a sleepy smile. 
“Hi” she yawned softly moving to relieve him of her weight on his chest. He felt kinda unhappy as she moved away from him, missing her touch instantly. There was something peaceful about being connected to her. 
“Hi” he said back finding himself tracing her fingers gently. 
“How are you feeling?” she asked gently looking over his bad hand and glancing at his good one that was tracing her own.
“Oh it hurts like hell...but I’ll be alright” he said bracing himself for her to ask him what had happened. 
But she didn’t, she didn't push him, she didn’t ask him a million questions or get upset with him or ask what the hell he was thinking. Instead the blonde gently undid his bandages and redressed his wounds while Spider did his best to keep from bouncing up and down with energy. 
She giggled softly “Okay okay...you’re done...you ready for breakfast?” she asked. 
Spider tilted his head, his brow furrowing. “You aren’t...you aren’t going to ask me what happened? Or get mad at me for...this” he asked holding up his hands. 
Anya’s expression changed to one Spider couldn’t quite read. “Do you want me to ask you what happened?” she asked him gently. “It’s not that I don’t care...please trust me...it’s just...I don’t want you to feel like you owe me an explanation...I’m here to listen to you, to be your friend, to...to help you if you will let me but Spider, you never have to tell me anything you aren’t ready to” she said. 
He got lost in the melodic nature of her voice but he felt a sense of relief wash over him when she told him she didn’t expect him to explain. He almost wanted to start crying all over again, how was she so understanding? 
“I want to tell you...I just...I don’t know how yet” he whispered looking away from her. She gently tilted his head back to her. 
“Hey...I’ll be here when you’re ready okay?” she whispered. He nodded slowly and she grinned standing up. “Now come on...I know you’re dying to get out of here” 
“Yes! it’s so stuffy in here” he groaned, jumping up to follow her outside. 
Part 13
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