#i guess what i'm saying is don't be afraid if you can't express yourself like a “true native speaker”

[taexual]

Do you also read fanfictions? I am writing one but since English is not my mother language, I am afraid to actually post it lmao. Could you read? See if there's any grammar mistakes and if it flows naturally as it should. But if you cant, dont worry. I totally understand

hii, i don't really do beta reading/editing, sorry!! i can suggest some helpful tools, though, such as grammarly or instatext -- i've used both myself, and they're great! instatext requires a subscription, but you get a free trial period and can edit small portions of text for free every day

and if you think you'd prefer a person to read through it for you, you can always make a public post on tumblr, and ask if anyone would be interested!!!

regardless, have confidence, love!!! you're doing great 🤍🤍🤍

[slayfics]

Katsuki gets caught being sweet to you.

You started to finally catch your breath being at the top of the hiking trail Katsuki had dragged you out too.

"Alright there, it's just us up here so tell me already. What the hell has been going on?"

"That's why you brought me out here?" You asked.

"Just tell me already, stop being so damn stubborn." He pried you impatiently.

"I told you I'm fine Bakugo, just busy like everyone else." You replied.

"Don't give me that shit. Do you think I'm stupid? The other extras are too dense to notice but I can see how exhausted you've been this whole week. So just tell me- what's going on," He said.

"You didn't need to drag me out here on a hike in freezing weather to do this, you know," You said, slightly irritated at Katsuki continuing to push you.

"Ugh- will you stop stalling and talk already," He yelled, causing you to let out an annoyed sigh. Katsuki put his hands in his pockets and looked out at the view, his demeanor softening slightly. "You can talk to me, you know," he added, his voice lower and kinder than before.

You stayed looking at the view for a few more moments trying to figure out how to unpack everything that had been stressing you out. It wasn't like some big thing, but a summation of a bunch of little things that were beginning to become too challenging to manage.

A cold breeze blew by causing you to shiver. You wondered why Katsuki had insisted on bringing you up this mountain to talk to you. He could have pestered you in your dorm where it was warm.

Katsuki stole glances at you occasionally then focused back on the view not wanting to intimidate you too much from his glare. Hiking always helped him to clear his mind and gather his thoughts when they seemed too loud. He thought maybe it would help you too, and being away from all your classmates might make it easier for you to talk to him. At the very least it made it easier for Katsuki to be more vulnerable with you. He found it too daunting to express himself fully with all the attention of his classmates around. It was much easier being only in your company.

You took a deep breath, "I guess- it's just been hard to balance everything recently," You finally spoke, breaking the silence. Katsuki made it easy to open up to, as he had no problem sitting in silence for long extended periods. Others in your life felt the need to fill that silence with useless chatter which always prevented you from sitting in your emotions and being able to formulate them into words.

You took in another breath feeling a lump in your throat form. You hadn't wanted to talk to anyone about what was going on for fear of opening up the flood of emotions and not being able to stop. Now here it was. You didn't want to cry on this fucking hill.

Katsuki patiently waited while you gathered your thoughts.

"It's just been so much and I've been barely keeping up. It's- been getting to me recently. I've been forgetting things I shouldn't. Being unusually upset at things that aren't that big of a deal- and I just- it's dumb." You cut yourself off afraid to say anymore.

"It's not dumb. Don't hold that shit in, it's not healthy," He said encouraging you to keep talking.

You sighed, "I just... know that it could be way worse, and I've been through way worse so- I feel so irritated at myself. What I'm going through now isn't something I can't handle. I know that. So why do I feel so fucking exhausted with everything," You replied wiping a stray tear from your cheek.

"Hmm," Katsuki grunted, processing what you said. "You know, it's ok to be tired, and- to not be perfect. You can't just deny yourself from feeling overwhelmed because it could be worse. If you're exhausted now then those feelings are real- and it's ok to have them," He spoke.

You looked down at the view watching the distant cars pass, "Thanks," You managed to say taking another deep breath.

"You shouldn't wait to handle them until they explode either. Trust me, I know what that's like," He said, causing you to let out a small giggle. "You're too damn hard on yourself you know that?"

You let out a full laugh, "Oh that's pretty good coming from you. You're the pro at having too high expectations for yourself," you laughed.

You and Katsuki were wrapped up in your conversation causing you not to notice approaching classmates in the distance. Mina and Eijiro had also decided to come up the hill after class and spotted both of you in the distance.

"That looks like we shouldn't interrupt," Eijiro said.

"Yeah," Mina agreed. "But maybe... we could get a little closer to make sure everything is ok?" She said, pulling Eijiro into the bushes to spy on you and Katsuki. Eijiro was highly against the plan but was unable to protest for fear of you two hearing.

"Yeah I know I have high expectations for myself... that's why I know what it fucking looks like when you're being too hard on yourself. So- tonight I'm coming to your dorm and, I'm making sure you get to bed at a reasonable fucking time."

Mina's eyes widened as she looked at Eijiro, "Coming to their dorm?!" She whispered, and Eijrio covered her mouth, silencing her.

"You mean Grandpa time at 9 p.m.?"

"Shut up! 9 p.m. is late as hell! You damn idiots just don't know how to have a good sleep schedule! Look I'm making sure you get some sleep and tomorrow I'm taking you out. So- figure out where you want to eat, I don't care where. And I'm not letting you say no you need a break," Katsuki replied.

"You don't have to do that Bakugo."

"Of course, I don't have to but, I want to. So just shut up and let me take care of you ok. You better not be afraid to order enough food this time either! I'm buying so- just get whatever you want, alright?"

"Ok ok," You laughed, feeling your mood brighten.

"Next time, just tell me when you're having a bad day or something. Stop making me drag it out of you. I- worry about you, you know? Now let's go back to the dorms. I see you shivering," He said, beginning to walk back down the hill.

Mina squirmed again under Eijiro's hand, keeping her silent. Her eyes said it all. She was in disbelief at Katsuki's words.

"Here," Katsuki said, holding his hand out and offering it to you. "I'll warm your hand with my quirk," he said.

You grabbed his hand interlacing your fingers with his.

"Don't dare say anything about how sweaty my hands are!" He barked.

You giggled, "How many times do I have to tell you I don't care Bakugo. It's part of your quirk, and your quirk is amazing you shouldn't be self-conscious about it. Besides, I'm always happy to hold your hand," You said as you two walked down the mountain.

"Tch whatever," Katsuki grumbled looking away from you as a small tint grew on his cheeks.

Finally, when you and Katsuki were far enough down the hill, Eijiro released Mina.

"WHAT WAS THAT?!?" Mina exclaimed.

"Shh shhh," Eijiro pleaded.

"WHAT- He wants to take care of them?!? OH MY GOD! They are totally dating right?! That's what he said he's taking them out to eat! And he's sneaking into their dorm! Wait wait- when they held hands it sounded like that had before! AND AND BAKUGO WAS TOTALLY BLUSHING! NO WAY!" Mina said looking like she might pass out from all this information.

"Ashido relax, we shouldn't have heard any of that!" Eijiro replied.

"Yeah but but-" Mina exclaimed, her head spinning. "Who knew Baklugo could actually be so sweet! I can't wait to tell Jiro-" She said, pulling out her phone.

"NO!" Eijiro said, grabbing her phone from her. "Uh- sorry, I didn't mean to be so harsh but- you can't tell anyone what we heard ok?" Eijiro said.

"WHAT?! I just heard Bakugo being the sweetest boyfriend ever and you expect me not to say anything about that?!"

"YES!" Eijiro yelled. "Look they both like their privacy and there is a reason they were all the way up here talking, Ashido. I think we should keep this a secret and let them do things at their own pace ok?" He said, handing Mina back her phone.

"UGH-" She exclaimed letting out a big sigh. "I guess you're right... but wow who would have thought Bakugo could be a decent person much less a good boyfriend." She said.

Eijiro just shrugged at her words, "I don't know he's not a bad guy like you all make him out to be you know."

"Wait! You totally already knew didn't you!" Mina said, slapping Eijiro's shoulder.

"Hey! I mean- Bakugo is my best friend you know, so yeah I did..." He answered truthfully.

"You suck! Keeping secrets like that from me!" Mina said playfully, waving a finger at him.

"I'm sorry, but it's their business you know?" He said.

"Yeah I understand, guess we should go back to the dorms too now," Mina suggested.

"Yeah it is pretty cold up here, let's go." He agreed as they both started to walk down the hill. "I don't have Bakugo's quirk or anything but- if you're cold you can hold my hand too if you want," Eijiro suggested.

Mina's face tinted a darker pink as she reached out and grabbed Eijiro's hand.

Tags: @unofficialmuilover @maddietries

Picture taken from @everypanelofkatsuki, thank you for all your hard work! Go check them out if you haven’t!

[peppermintquartz]

stuck in an elevator

Someone with a sick sense of humor must be writing my life, because a benevolent God sure as hell would never plan this, Tommy thinks in his bitchiest mental tone. Then he snorts. As if anyone would be interested enough to write a single paragraph about him.

The other occupant of the elevator pointedly does not look at him. Evan Buck keeps his tone so neutral, it's almost robotic. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing. I mean, of all the places in Los Angeles to visit on a day off, we end up at LACMA together. And now we're stuck in the same elevator. What are the odds?" The ludicrously serendipitous nature of this encounter is keeping Tommy from other, less-pleasant thoughts, namely being trapped in a space without a view of the outside world. His pulse is starting to race.

They tried calling 911, but the signal in the elevator was poor. Thankfully the emergency intercom did connect to the museum's operations office, who has contacted emergency services.

"I should've taken the stairs," Tommy grumbles. His skin itches with the need to feel fresh air.

"With that boot on your ankle? Then you're dumber than I thought you were." Evan Buck finally glances over, his blue eyes scanning him from head to toe. "How did you injure yourself anyway?"

"Tripped when I was getting out of the bird," Tommy replies honestly.

Evan Buck scoffs and shakes his head, but his expression softens. "You doing okay otherwise?"

There are so many ways Tommy can answer. He can pretend he is perfectly okay. Somewhat okay. He can claim that he misses Evan Buck, but he wants to be friends, just friends. He can be flippant. Make it funny, keep things superficial.

But this is Evan asking him.

"I miss you like a heartbeat" is what comes out instead. And it's true - Tommy feels like an automaton, moving through time, his routines carrying him along from dawn till dusk.

Entire days going by without a single text from Evan Buck feel empty and pointless. The bedsheets need to be laundered but Tommy doesn't want to lose the final traces of the last time they slept in the same bed. There are books Evan Buck brought over to read when Tommy wants to watch a movie.

And now they are stuck together, in an enclosed metal box, and Tommy is trying not to think about that while also trying not to think about how much he wants to kiss Evan. So he vacillates between a bone-deep phobia and a bone-deep yearning.

"I'm sorry. That was too heavy to lay on you like that." His fingers are clammy where his palms are on the mirrored wall. Licking his lips, he says, "But I don't want to lie to you. Not about anything. But I'm good otherwise, Evan."

"I'm not." Evan inhales deeply and blows out his breath. "I'm... I'm baking every time I think about texting you or calling you. The loft smells like a goddamn bakery. And still, still I can't forget the way you smell, the way you sound, the way you fucking taste. I want - I want so badly - to turn back time, figure out what I said wrong that made you run from me. Maybe I wanna be mad at you. I don't know. But I'm not good, Tommy. I'm not gonna be good for a long time."

"I'm sorry," Tommy begins, but Evan cuts him off.

"I don't want you to be sorry," he snaps, and to Tommy's shame, his eyes well up with tears. "I want you to be mine. I want to be yours. I want... I want us, together. That's what I want. I don't wanna be good, I don't want you to be sorry, I want us to be happy together, that's all I fucking want!"

The silence that falls between them is thick as concrete.

His hands and feet are cold now, and he thinks he is a little dizzy. Gulping down a breath, Tommy says, "I shouldn't have run. It was... I was afraid. That... that you'd see me and everything I'm not."

This is when Evan sighs and turns to face him. "I should've chased after you. I was afraid too. I moved too fast, I know now. But you running away and ghosting me after was a dick move."

"I guess we both have a lot to work through." Tommy manages a tight smile. He is starting to feel lightheaded, and his breathing is picking up pace despite his best efforts to stay calm and distract himself with Evan's presence. His hands are clammy and he tries to wipe them dry on his jeans. "Evan?"

"Tommy?"

"How long before 911 arrives?" Tommy's mouth is dry. His vision sparks and he is valiantly trying to hold on to his composure, but he feels like he's boiling in his dark blue henley; he needs air, he needs the sky, he needs space to flee-

"Tommy!" Evan is right next to him, keeping him from collapsing and hurting himself. His touch grounds Tommy in the present moment, and his face this close blocks out the sight of the metal coffin they are stuck in. "They'll be here soon, okay? It's all good, they'll be here soon. Breathe for me, come on, inhale , two, three, four; hold, two. three, four..."

Evan talks him through the breathing exercises, holding him up and against himself, all the way even after the elevator lurches back to life and delivers them to the next floor safely.

After he's helped out of the elevator, Tommy wretches and vomits all over the floor, some of the sick getting on Evan's nice shoes.

"Sorry," says Tommy, eyes tearing from the force of the nausea, his big frame trembling.

"They're just shoes," says Evan, soothing a hand along his spine. To the attending paramedic, he says, "He has mild claustrophobia. Not usually a problem, but we were in there a while."

Tommy follows the paramedic - Jefferson - to a bench, accepting a quick look-over. To his surprise, Evan stays with him. Jefferson doesn't see anything wrong other than shock and leaves them with a blanket when another call comes in, about some old man and a broken hip.

Tommy finally recovers after about twenty minutes. He smiles wryly at Evan. "Sorry. You don't have to stick around, there's a lot to see in LACMA."

"Tough luck chasing me off," says Evan. There's a determined set to his jaw.

"Evan, I mean, Buck, surely you have other places to go."

"First of all, I hate hearing you call me Buck. Second of all, I'm not going anywhere. I know exactly what I want, and I'm pretty sure I know what you want."

"Yeah? What do I want?"

"To be my forever," says Evan. He looks Tommy in the eye. "And I know enough about myself and relationships, a-and love, to say that I want you to be my forever too. So. Hah. I'm sticking around. Sucks to be you."

Tommy huffs out an amused and exasperated breath. "Still a brat."

"Yeah? Well, you can either put up with me, or you can do something about it." But there's no hiding the curl of his lips.

[bachiras-toaster]

dazai teaches you how to suck dick : ̗̀➛

OSAMU DAZAI x f!reader

cw. nsfw virgin!reader, dick sucking, hand job, alcohol consumption

wc. 2.9k

When the two of you arrived at Dazai’s apartment to hang out after a long evening at the Agency, you had already made yourself comfortable on his couch as he placed the pizza boxes he had ordered on the coffee table in front of you.

"Nice!-" You beamed, taking a slice before your best friend even had the chance to sit down.

"Hey, don't get too comfortable there without me." The scruffy-haired man smirked slightly as he took a seat on the other end of the sofa, looking at you over the pizza; also putting a bottle of sake down. "You might want to sit closer." He teased lightly before taking a bite of his own slice.

"Alcohol? I like your way of thinking." You giggled, already having grabbed it by the handle to pour yourself a mix into the cup you had preparedly set in front of you.

Dazai laughed slightly, holding his pizza up in challenge as he watched you pour your drink from beyond his bites.

"You can't resist a drink, can you?" He hummed lightly, pouring his own glass once you had finished. "I knew you’d be all over the bottle as soon as I put it down.”

"You know me so well." You beamed brightly at him, clinking your cups together when he had finished pouring.

“Cheers." He exclaimed with a small smirk before taking a sip from his cup, watching intently as you did the same. Your willingness to drink with him had always amused him, and he couldn’t help but smirk as he felt the need to take advantage of the situation with the spark of an interesting conversation. "So to pass the time... Let's play twenty questions."

"Twenty questions? Alright." You giggled, already beginning to tap your chin thoughtfully. "Well, I've known you for quite a while, so there aren't a lot of questions I could ask, so I'm gonna try to be reall obscure about what I say..." A lightbulb seemed to flicker in your mind. "Aha! What's the worst thing you've been told off for during your school days?"

The man just chuckled lightly at your query before taking another bite of his pizza, considering the question deeply.

"Oh, well, there's been quite a few times I’ve been in trouble. Usually, it's just for something small like talking in class or not turning in an assignment on time." He grinned, taking another sip of his sake. "...But the worst thing I got into trouble for was sneaking a girl into my dorm room. The dean wasn't very happy about it."

"Seriously?!" You chuckled brightly. "Oh my god, you would do that, wouldn't you?" You asked rhetorically with an amused smile. "Okay. now your turn to ask me a question."

Dazai questioned almost immediately, like he had such a question simmering in the corner of his mind for so long.

“What's the one thing you want to do but are too afraid to try?" He asked, raising an eyebrow in curiosity.

You giggled a little, trying to cover your laughs by sipping your drink over your own words.

"Oh, god. This is an embarrassing one..." You mumbled out, hesitant to respond- but figuring you didn’t have a lot to hide from one of your closest colleagues at the Agency. "...I guess probably giving someone a blowjob." She shrugged lightly, bringing her legs up onto the couch to cross them as she drank more.

"Wow— I really expect that from someone who's a virgin." Dazai’s eyes widen slightly in surprise before he quickly recovered and chuckled, trying to keep his expression neutral. "I'm not sure why you’d think that's embarrassing. It's just something you haven't done before." He jabbed, leaning back on the couch slightly. "Don't be afraid to try it. You never know if you'll like it until you do." He teased lightly, enjoying the playful banter between you two.

"Okay, haha, very funny." You feigned an amused expression, rolling your eyes at his virgin comment. "I get it. I'm a virgin and you're a massive playboy."

"Hey, I didn't say I was a massive playboy! I just happen to be a little popular with the ladies.” Dazai grinned, his eyes twinkling with pride. "I have more experience than you, that's all." He leaned forward slightly, his elbows resting on his knees.

"...Have you ever gotten a blowjob?" You asked curiously, but you quickly felt like retracting your statement when you realised what kind of question you had just asked- and to your best friend too! "—Nevermind! Forget I asked that—"

"Well, it is twenty questions. If you're going to ask, you might as well know." Dazai shrugged, taking another sip of his drink. "Yeah, I have. Feels good." He smiled slightly, trying not to look too smug about it. "If you ask me, it's nothing you should be scared about trying."

"It's just scary because I'm a—... I haven’t done it before." You grumbled, hiding your lips behind your cup. "Like— I wouldn't even know what to do. And if the guy I lost my v-card to turned out to be an asshole, it'd ruin my whole experience."

“Then you'll just have to find someone who knows what they're doing, then." He winked playfully, his smirk turning slightly teasing. "Or you could always practice on something else beforehand." He casually took another sip of his drink, watching you carefully.

"Oh yeah? And who the hell would be willing to let me practise giving them a blowjob?" You scoffed at his suggestion, only for them to respond in all seriousness.

"I could always volunteer, you know. You know I'd be more than happy to help you out, even if it's just practice."

You froze for a moment, staring blankly at him. You didn't seem to believe that he was being anything but sarcastic in what he was saying, and you just let out a chuckle in order to match what you thought was his playful intention.

"You're funny."

"I try." Dazai chuckled, putting his cup down onto the coffee table to focus his entire attention on you; he couldn't help but grin. "So, are you gonna take me up on my offer or what?" He asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

"Are you being serious?" You asked plainly.

"Of course I'm serious." He couldn't help but tease you a little bit, enjoying the atmosphere between you two. "You know I'd never lie to you." He added. "But then again... Maybe you're to innocent for that." He commented with a grin as he looked away for a second, knowing that it would get a rise out of you.

"I am not innocent!" You put your cup down on the table, your face flushing as you looked sort of offended at the remark.

“Oh, come on, (Y/n)." Dazai chuckled, shaking his head slightly. "You know you are. But that's what makes you so damn cute." He leaned forward, his nose scrunching with an adorable smile.

But you simply furrowed your brows, gnawing your her bottom lip as you seemed to be deep in thought at his abrupt offer.

“…You'd really help me?"

"Of course I would!" He smiled, taking your hand in his. "I'd do anything for you." He leaned back in, his eyes twinkling with mischief. "It'll be our little secret, okay? Just between us. I just know you’d be embarrassed falling into the same palm of mine that so many women have fallen into before.” He boasted, to your reluctant agreement.

"Okay..." You said, watching as he reclined comfortable against the sofa before you began inching closer towards him. "But— I don't know what I'm doing." You gulped, abruptly freezing at the realisation.

“That's what practice is for." Dazai smiled, pulling you closer to him. "Don’t worry! We’ll take it slow, and I'll teach you everything you need to know." He ran his fingers through your hair, savouring the feeling of you sat so meekly opposite him. "I'm actually glad you agreed to this. You have no idea how much I've imagined you in front of me like this."

"What—?" Your face immediately felt warm when he said that.

"Don't pretend like you didn't know." He teased, smirking at you. He leaned in close, his lips close to your ear, whispering softly. "And don't pretend that I'm the only one with such thoughts… You seriously thought I couldn’t hear you the nights you’d let me crash on your couch?”

"What are you talking about?" You asked, reluctant to crawl any further towards him.

"Oh, come on," He chuckled, his eyes sparkling with playful amusement. "You know exactly what I'm talking about." He leaned back against the sofa, patting the spot in front of him. "I've heard you… And it wasn't just the occasional moan," he whispered, his hand stroking along your jaw as he leaned in close. "I'm always getting hard listening to you. Fuckin' my own fist and pretending it's you."

"You— What?" You gulped, your face blushing profusely. You admitted, you did find him a attractive as hell, but never had you thought that he'd have such lewd thoughts about you.

"You were always whispering sexy things in your sleep, about wanting someone to fuck you hard." The man smirked, his hand running gently down your arm before lifting his thumb to trace your collarbone. "It only made me want you more… The fact that you’d be so bold to make those noises while I’m here."

He reached out to take your hand to place it on his crotch, which already seemed to have a tent formed in it due to his erection. You gulped as he forced you to feel his hard-on, and you looked up at him, sweating a little.

"You could... Hear that? I didn't realise I spoke in my sleep..."

“Well, now you know." Your friend smirked, still holding your hand firmly against his crotch. "You were really anything but quiet. But truly. Your voice was like music to my ears." Dazai whispered, holding a smug grin. "I couldn't get enough of it." He leaned in close to your ear, his breath hot against your neck. "And I still can't."

You felt like you couldn’t say anything. You just remained seated where you were, hesitant to crawl further towards him; but your hand was still confidently placed on his pants, which you could feel was growing tighter by the second.

"(Y/n)..." Dazai moaned softly, his hand moving to your thigh. "You're making this so fuckin’ hard for me..!" He chuckled gravelly. "How about this, sweet..." He purred, his fingers lacing with yours as he began to guide you to the space between his legs, his other hand moving down your thigh to tease at you. "If you like the feel of this..." He trailed off, his thumb brushing against your clothed cunt. "Maybe you could return the favor? Come on. I’ll talk you through how to suck dick well.”

After a moment, you just nodded, feeling as if you were complying completely.

“Okay… As long as you tell me what to do…” You sat on your knees between his thighs on the couch, loosening the bands of his sweatpants so you could pull it down— He had helped you with that.

“Atta girl." Dazai murmured, his voice rough with desire as he watched you undress him. He had even leaned back against the couch, giving you plenty of room to work. "Just take your time and pay attention to how I react." He purred, his hand reaching down to guide your hand to his base. "…C’mon... Touch it. Take it all in your hand. Feel how hard it is for you."

As he fished his cock out of his pants, you seemed a little intimidated by how big he was— you started to understand what women saw in him… Had this been the first time you had actually seen a dick in person? You took his length into your palms, trying to adjust yourself to the feeling before looking up at him and awaiting further command.

“Good." Dazai praised softly, his voice hoarse with need. "Now, slowly, start to stroke up and down." He instructed, watching as your hand began to move in time with his words. "Don't worry about being gentle. I like it when you're firm."

You started firmly stroking your hand up and down the length of his cock, interested in how warm he felt in your palm.

"That's it." He encouraged, his hips starting to roll slightly in time with your strokes. "You're doing great." He murmured, reaching down to run a finger lightly over your lower lip. "Tell me... do you like touching me like this?"

“It… Feels okay…” You said softly, continuing to run your hand up and down his cock.

"Just okay?" He questioned, raising an eyebrow playfully. "To me, I'd say it looks pretty fucking hot seeing you touch me like this." He leaned back against the sofa, leaving you more space to work with. “Now, I want you to use your tongue.”

“My—?” You stammered, not stopping your hand movement. “Like… What do I do? Do I just— Do I need to put it all in my mouth?”

"No, not yet." He reassured you. "Just tease me with with your tongue; run it along the underside of my cock." He watched as you complied, his member twitching slightly at your touch.

You leaned down forward a bit so you could run your tongue up the length of his dick. You seemed a little surprised with the surface of how it felt, but you let your taste travel the entire length before you got to the tip, where you swiped a lick over the slit of it.

“Fuck." He hissed, his hips jerking up slightly. "That feels so good." He groaned, his hand sliding into your hair to grip gently. "Keep going, (Y/n)." He encouraged, his voice thick with lust.

You kitten-licked his cock, your tongue licking stripes up his dick like it was some piece of candy. The view of you from above only aroused Dazai more- Which you could tell by the way he subtly attempted to lush your head down.

"Oh god—“ He groaned, unable to get the words out fast enough. "You feel fucking incredible." His hips jerked up, his cock twitching almost painfully against your mouth. "Suck on it, (Y/n), suck me off. Take the tip into your mouth first.” He demanded, his grip on your scalp tightening.

You followed his command, finding the tip of his cock and planting a soft kiss onto it before you took it into your mouth. Once the tip was settled between your wet lips, you began licking at it from the inside of your mouth.

“Oh, fuck." He shakily breathed out, his hand sliding from your hair down to your neck, gripping it lightly. "You're doing so good, baby." He praised, his voice rough with need. "Don't stop, just keep going. Take more of me down as you go.”

You nodded, holding the base of his cock with your hand as you gradually began taking more of his dick inside of your mouth as you sucked on him. Your tongue swirled from his tip down to the veins of his length, your saliva coating his cock.

"Shit." Soft groans were heard from his lips, his eyes closing as he leaned his head back against the couch cushions. His voice was thick with lewd noises, almost hoarse from the sound of it. "(Y/n)— Fuck, that feels so good." Dazai moaned, thrusting his hips forward slightly. "Don't stop, baby. Come on—" He encouraged, sliding his hand down to your cheek to rub lightly.

Your head bobbed up and down on his cock, and you quickly realised that the parts that you couldn’t reach with your tongue, you could just stroke with your palm. Your slurping became more aggressive as you found your rhythm, and the pace in which you sucked him off became more steady.

“Fu-uck—" You could vividly hear his panting, hands gripping the couch behind him. He could feel himself getting close, his hips starting to buck forward more forcefully as he gave in to the pleasure you were giving him. "Your mouth is so fucking amazing, you sure you’re not a virgin?”

You continued, feeling fuelled by his praise and wanting to suck him off more simply because of how much he seemed to enjoy it. You also seemed to get off to how much his muscles tensed at your tongue. Dazai moaned— Almost a little too needily— hips jerking up forcefully. His head was thrown back, eyes closed tight as he tried to get closer.

"Don't stop, don’t stop, don’t stop—“ He whined out. “(Y/n). I'm about to cum. Fuck. Fuck." Dazai’s breathing hitched as he watched you, his fingers tangling in your hair lightly. He could feel his climax building fast, and he knew he wouldn't be able to hold out much longer. "Fuck...”

You kept at the pace you were going at, but your sucking became more desperate as you wanted to know how it would feel to make a guy cum— And partially because of how nice Dazai sounded when he whimpered.

“(Y/n), open your mouth." He ordered, voice low and demanding. He knew he couldn't hold out much longer, and he didn't want to cum in your mouth without permission.

Though thankfully, he didn’t have to. You did as you were told quite obediently, and immediately opened your mouth wide to him, your tongue laid flatly as you let him in. Dazai looked down at your opened mouth, eyes dark with lust. He could feel his climax rushing up fast, his cock throbbing against your soft inside.

"Swallow, (Y/n)." He warned.

As his reddened tip spurt his seed into your wet mouth, you didn’t even need to be told twice before you swallowed it almost immediately without a second thought. Your face seemed to contort a little as you hadn’t expect the cum to taste so salty, nor did you expect it to have such an odd consistency, but you swallowed nevertheless.

Dazai let out a shaky breath, his hips jerking back against the couch.

“Fuck." He panted, unable to believe how good that felt. He looked down, eyes soft and smouldering. "I really shouldn't have let you do that." He sighed as he felt your warmth envelop his cock, swallowing him down. He groaned deeply, his body shuddering from the intense release. "Shit, (Y/n)..."

“Why not…?” You queried innocently, swiping off the cum that dropped from the corner of your lips to swallow in your mouth.

"Because now I want more." He had confessed, running his fingers through her your gently. He leaned down, his lips brushing against your ear. "And I know you're not ready for what I really want." He whispered, his voice low and rough.

[trafalgarya]

Hashiras x reader who doesn't know how to show emotions.

Plot : The Hashiras (from Demon Slayer (not all of them)) x a stoic, inexpressive reader. Headcanons.

With : Giyuu Tomioka, Muichiro Tokito, Kyojuro Rengoku, Shinobu Kocho, Mitsuri Kanroji.

tw : giyuu's backstory is briefly mentioned. kyojuro's part involves anger and sadness. shinobu's part can be seen as slightly suggestive, but there's nothing explicit.

gn!reader. reader feels emotions just like everyone else, but they're just not too fond of displaying them.

hi ! so, uh, it's been a while. tbh, i completely forgot about tumblr. lots of things (not in a bad way, rest assured) are happening in my life rn, and i hadn't much time to spend time on tumblr. i won't promise you anything about me definitely coming back on tumblr, as i don't want to give you guys any hopes that'll eventually reveal themselves false, but i'll try.

my english has improved a bit, but i'm afraid it's still shitty, so i apologize if what i say isn't always coherent enough.

one last thing : i'll often mentions headcanons about when the both of you are going to bed to sleep together, but of course, these are when the characters in question aren't assigned on a mission.

Giyuu Tomioka

Giyuu himself doesn't like to publicly showcase his emotions, so you being inexpressive as well is kind of a gift for him. Don't make me say what I haven't, though ! He'd love you just as much if you were someone expressive by nature, but you being inexpressive suits him even better, because he knows you'll understand how he feels about this subject.

Both of you being a stoic couple doesn't prevent either of you to show your love for the other, though. You're just... not doing it outside closed doors. Hugs and kisses are at the rendezvous once both of you find yourselves in a quiet place where you know you won't be disturbed.

However, Giyuu isn't too fond of being overwhelmed of affection. Sure, he enjoys feeling the warmth of your body as you lay your head on his chest, his arms wrapped around your waist, and I'll tell you, he even enjoys being the one to lay on your chest. Hearing your heartbeat acknowledges him with the fact that you're still alive and not leaving anytime soon, so he won't be having a mental breakdown about losing one other person he cherishes. He loves the feeling of your hands grasping his, your fingers intertwined together as you enjoy the peacefulness and calmness of that loving moment... That said, I can't really imagine Giyuu being so touch deprived that he'd want affection all day long. He needs a bit of space sometime — not in a "Leave me alone" way, but in an introverted way, if that's the correct word —, and he knows you'll respect it as you're not one to make a scene about such things.

I can see Giyuu enjoying to read in your presence. He'd especially love it if both of you were lying on your double-sized bed, wrapped in each other's arms as he's holding a book for you both to read as you readjusted your position to make yourself more comfortable on his chest. That'd kind of be your dates, I guess ? I mean, Giyuu isn't someone to willingly go outside and take long walks at night.

You're the type of couple to either have deep, philosophical talks at night, rambling about your lives or something intriguing that happened during the day, or the type of couple to stay silent even when you're together, just silently enjoying the other one's presence and the amount of joy they're bringing to your life, no in-between.

If you're the second type of couple, however, that doesn't mean you'll never talk at all. If there happens to be a problem within your relationship, as mature adults, you'll talk through it and find solutions together. Neither of you will leave until you've both found a solution. Giyuu wouldn't mind doing compromises for your relationship to work better — he's not risking losing you just like he did with Sabito, Makomo and Tsutako — and so would you. Despite not showing him at all times, you love him with all your heart, and you know it's reciprocal.

Overall, you being stoic suits Giyuu just fine, and he loves it even better. He knows you won't question his lack of emotions on his face at any times, and that's probably what's keeping him in your relationship. Outside of his undying love for you, of course. He's undeniably the best one to go to if you want some calm and peacefulness.

Muichiro Tokito

Despite his age, Muichiro is a mature boy, and he knows better than to question whether your lack of expression is due to the fact that you're growing tired of him — which you clearly aren't, quite the opposite actually —, because he's in the same situation as you are. Just like everyone else, he's able to grow attached to someone, to cling onto them, just like he can feel joy, sadness, anger, etc.

He knows you're mainly showing your love physically, and privately, and he respects that. Not that he isn't too fond of PDA, but he doesn't crave it, and so do you. So, just like with Giyuu, you both keep your love within closed doors.

However, unlike Giyuu, Muichiro is much more clingy. Whenever he can, he'll go on and hold your hand, immediately intertwining his fingers with yours, he'll stand on his toes and kiss one of your cheeks, having the satisfaction of bringing a faint blush to the inexpressive being you are, he'll snuggle in your arms and rest his head on your chest, immediately closing his eyes to appreciate your warmth the best he can, he'll play with your hair after asking you if you were okay with it... You got it, he's quite the clingy boy.

Speaking of hair. If you have long hair, he'll gladly brush them and style them for you. Just know, he especially love braiding your hair, he thinks it looks good and cute on you. However, if you have short hair, he'll ask you to brush his instead. He's gifted with natural, long, beautiful hair and he knows it, and he wants to keep them maintained. As you do so, he'll probably sit on your lap, crossing his legs as he hums a melody, trying his best not to move too much so as not to complicate you the task at hand. When you're done, he'll reward you with a small kiss on the lips and a warm smile.

When it's time for you to go to bed, you already know he's clinging onto you as if it was the last thing he'll ever do. You're usually spooning. He doesn't mind being the big spoon, but he usually prefers being the little spoon. It just brings him a sense of comfort, he can't explain why exactly, but all he knows is that he loves it. He'll wrap his arms around your waist, snuggling his face in the crook of your neck to smell your scent. It relaxes him and helps him to go to sleep.

You're often training together. As a Hashira, he acknowledges his strength, and he'll go easy on you. The last thing he'd want to do is to hurt you. In that case, he'd act more as a teacher for you, helping you with moves you're struggling with. However, if you're strong enough to keep up with him — first of all, he'd be proud of having such a strong S/O, and that'll make him relax about knowing you can protect yourself — but ultimately, he won't hold back as much as he was planning to. He'll still do his best not to hurt you, but he'll be having fun training with you. It brings him a strange sense of pride and satisfaction knowing that he can freely showcase his strength while you're keeping up with him.

Overall, one of the best Hashiras to be inexpressive with. He's someone understanding, but that said, it doesn't mean he'd hold back at all. You're his and he's yours, so why restraining himself when it comes to showering you with affection ?

Kyojuro Rengoku

Well... He's the complete opposite of you. That man is full of energy and always seen with a smile on his face. He's loud and always up for a challenge, while you're... well... usually quiet and stoic. But, in his eyes, that's what makes your charm !

He's completely respectful of your boundaries. If you don't want to do something he wants to do, then be sure he won't do it. Despite how hard it would be for him to not do it, he's putting your health and well-being before his own needs. Don't want a hug ? That's fine, he can settle for your presence instead ? Don't want to go outside ? He's just as fine staying at home with you ! Don't want to cook ? Just rest in bed, he'll take care of everything !

You got it, he's very respectul of your boundaries and doesn't want to pressure you into anything that could make you uncomfortable. That's the last thing he'd want to do, to make you uncomfortable.

Whenever you need some calm, some relief or simply to talk, you can count on him ! The moment you appear to be sad or angry, he's already sitting next to you. He'll gently rest his hand on your shoulder, or your thigh if that's okay with you, and he'll ask you what's wrong, and if you want to talk about it. He'll wrap a warm arm around your neck, bringing you closer to him, and he'll run a hand through your hair, putting you at ease the best he can. He's someone quite skilled with his words, he'll always find the right words to comfort you, and he'll be careful with his choice of words. He doesn't want to accidently say something that'll make you feel worse than before.

When it's time to go to bed, he'll sneak in the blankets and wait for you to get ready as well. Just know, he's a man who usually sleeps without a top, his torso and strong, muscled, well traced arms displayed, for your eyes's pleasure. If you don't want to cuddle, be sure he'll at least kiss you on the lips. If you want to, however, he WILL cuddle. He's not missing the opportunity ! He likes to be the big spoon, it brings him a sense of protection knowing that you entrust him enough to let him carry you in his arms in such an intimate way. He isn't someone to fall asleep so quickly, so he'll admire the peaceful look on your face as you're deeply asleep, wandering how such a beauty could have fallen in love with him, someone who's so different from you.

When you both are going out, he's always having an arm wrapped around your waist. Not to display affection or to show to everyone that you're his, but to protect you. He knows you can protect yourself, but he's an overthinker, and wants to make sure you're always by his side. You never know what could happen, especially in public places, so he makes sure to at least have an arm wrapped around your waist.

Overall, Kyojuro is someone very understanding and respectful of your boundaries who'll make sure to protect you at all cases. He loves you very much and is always there for you. Probably the best one if you're feeling down, as he's the most skilled one with his words.

Shinobu Kocho

That woman is such a tease. If you agreed to be in a relationship with her, you also silently agreed to be made fun of at all times. Not in a mean way, of course, she just likes to tease like no one ever did.

You kind of remind her of Giyuu, that's probably one of the reason she's "bullying" you at least as much as she does to Giyuu, if not even more. With a playful smile on her face, she'll often do remarks about how you're not smiling enough, and how pretty you would look for her if you had a smile on your face. She's probably the one who leaves you all blushing and flustered the most out there, although you're usually not used to blush and be unsettled that much. You kind of hate her for that, but oh how you love it as well. Kind of like a love-hate relationship.

On a more serious tone, she's always reminding you that it's all for fun. She doesn't want you broken and saddened because of her playful personality. If it ever made you uncomfortable, she'd immediately notice it and stop her remarks. She'll feel remorseful, although not showing it. She doesn't want you to know that.

As the insect Hashira, she possesses lots of medical and pharmaceutical knowledge to make up for her lack of physical strenght — although that doesn't mean she's physically weak, she's actually pretty strong, her physical strenght is simply not enough to cut down a demon's neck —, she's the best one to go to whenever you feel sick. Whether you've returned of a mission and you're full or bruises and cuts, you're having a fever or a simple headache, she has all the best medicines already prepared for you. It won't take much before she finds the medicine she's searching for, and she'll immediately administer it on you. If your case is serious, she'll make sure you're lying on a bed and moving only for the necessary. And trust me when I say that if she has to tie you up on the bed for you to stop moving, she'll do it. She always has some... accessories ready for these cases.

As one of the doctor of the Demon Slayer Corps, she's often busy healing slayers and creating medicines. However, if you need to talk to her about something important, she'll make sure to talk to you while doing the task she's assigned. If she's healing a slayer, you both will talk standing up while she's doing her job. However, if she's producing some medicines, which often happens in her personal office, she'll grab a chair for you to sit. Whether the medicine needs constant attention or not, she'll prioritize you first and will be sure not to make you feel ignored. Although she may not always look at you in the eyes because of whatever she's doing, she's attentive and listening to you, and you know it.

Despite her petite figure, she's not one to underestimate. If, for some reasons, you decide to tease her back and acting bratty on her, may the Lord forgive you, because she won't be holding back. She'll remind you of your place and punish you suitably to how much of a brat you've been. She's not afraid to use radical solutions to get what she wants — as long as you've given your consent of course — and to prove to you that her height doesn't mean shit. It might be publicly, also reminding to everyone that she's not a woman to mess with, or it can be in a private setting, where you won't get disturbed. Rest assured, though, she won't hurt you... much.

Sadly, you're often sleeping alone. As I mentioned before, she's a doctor, and is often busy working on medicines or injured slayers. Even though she's sneaking into the bed at night and you both ultimately sleep together, you rarely fall asleep together. If that's hurting you at any point, she'll find a solution, whether it's to stop working for the night to sleep with you, or to bring you to her office, letting you sleep on her lap as she keeps working, she'll make sure to find a solution not to make you feel abandoned and neglected.

One thing she loves to do with you, even going as far as making it a daily thing, is having breakfast with you. Whether she has slept or not, she'll make sure to take ten to twenty minutes each morning to have breakfast with you. It is a must in your relationship, and you're happy with it, as she's probably the one out of the other Hashiras you'll see the less. She'll ask you if you've slept well, how was your night, etc. If you're not a morning person, she'll just restrain herself from talking that much, but she at least wants you to be there with her.

Overall, she's the best Hashira to go to if you feel sick. She's a busy woman but she makes sure to fulfill her duty of keep the relationship healthy and maintained as your girlfriend. She's not one to mess with, so as long as you respect her, you're fine. She's making sure you know she loves you very much and wants to keep you in her life for a long-term relationship, she doesn't like short relationships where y'all break up over a small argument, she's a mature woman who's talking through everything and makes sure to find a solution while doing her best at work.

Mitsuri Kanroji

Do I really need to specify she's the complete opposite of you ? Even worse than Kyojuro, she's a cheerful and happy being who always showcases her emotions. Rare are the moments where she isn't seen with a smile on her face. The difference between the both of you is so obvious that people can't help but ask how did you two ended up together.

Your lack of expression doesn't bother her in the slightest ; Trust me, she'll make up for the both of you, as the emotional person she is. She finds your lack of expression charming, cute and hot at once. She loves this side of you, seeing you so calm and unbothered makes her heart melt. All she wants to do is to pamper you and shower you in hugs and kisses. But if you aren't too fond of it, that's okay too ! She'll make up with other things she knows you tolerate, such as hand holding, words of affirmation or buying you gifts, often food.

Just like Shinobu, having breakfast with her is a must... except it's not only breakfast. In fact, she wants to spend the three dinners a day with you, she'll find herself all saddened and upset when she can't spend even one dinner with you. She wants to be by your side at all times, even though she knows it isn't always possible and is more of an utopic desire of hers.

She knows you're not talkative, and that's fine by her. Just like for your emotions, she'll make up for the both of you. She's the yapper to your listener. She'll often talk for hours and hours about her life, her day, about that one stray cat she crossed paths with on her way to a restaurant and how she couldn't resist the temptation to caress him, about that new, young and prodigious slayer called Tanjiro she sympathizes with, etc. Sometimes, she's afraid she's talking too much, but you assure her she's not, and in fact, you love listening to her.

Obanai was jealous of you at first, but eventually he realized you were treating Mitsuri well enough after lots of conversations with Mitsuri herself, so he kind of gave up on the idea of seducing Mitsuri and entrusted you with bringing her the joy she deserves to have. Be wary, however — if he hears ONE bad thing you did to Mitsuri, he'll knock your ass, going on and on about how she deserves to be treated like a princess and all. But Mitsuri often gets in his way, stopping him before he goes too far. Eventually, he stopped loving her, realizing you were the one who got her heart, and started acting just a little bit more friendly towards you.

When it's time to go to bed, she's often the one lying in the it first, tired of her day. Yup, whether she has done something or not, that's what makes it funny. When it's your turn to sneak under the blankets, she'll immediately snuggle to you, it goes from simply hugging you to spooning you — she doesn't mind being the little one or the big one, it's honestly up to you — to lying on top of you and resting her head in the crook of your neck. She'll whisper a weak "I love youuu" before quickly falling asleep. She's a quick sleeper, unlike her master Kyojuro, so you're often the one finding yourself admiring her angelic traits as she's peacefully sleeping next to/on top of you.

Overall, the sweetest Hashira to be in a relationship with. She's the one to go to if you need affection and for a sunshine to invade your life.

[em-ontv]

Hi I’m the anon who sent you the idea for “sing a song for me” and it’s literally so perfect I can’t wait to read the second part. I might cry a little I’m not even lying this was a dream I had and I was like huh wow that would make a cool fanfic but I can’t write at all. And you made it even better than I could’ve imagined thank you so much 🥰

Sing a song for me. (2/2)

Pairing: Soldier Boy x supe!fem!reader

Warnings: injuries/scars, comfort/intimacy (non-explicit), language, no use of y/n, Butcher being Butcher, probably ooc Ben (I made him a bit too gentle, we don't need more trauma), not proof-read

A/n: hello, anon! I'm so glad you liked part 1, this is the long due part 2 I promised. Hope you like it <3 sorry for taking so long to write this :'(

Read part 1 here

Word count: 2.4k

The inside of the van was cramped and smelled faintly of oil and sweat. The seats were worn, the leather cracked from use. The night outside was dense, you saw just enough stars to remind yourself that while you were locked away, there was a whole other world out there beyond your cell.

You sat beside Ben, who kept casting glances your way as if he was afraid you'd shatter. But you couldn't blame him... you must have looked terrible. The bruises, the exhaustion, the haunted look in your eyes. You didn't even bother to look at yourself in the reflection of the window on your way into the van. It felt like too much—like you couldn't handle what Vought had done to you. Not yet.

The ride was mostly silent until Butcher finally spoke.

"Alright, love, here's the deal." he said, breaking the silence. His eyes looked over you, his expression calculating. "We need to know now. Are you in, or do we drop you somewhere nice and safe to rot? We're taking down Homelander. It's not a bloody game."

Hughie shifted uncomfortably, his mouth opening like he wanted to say something, but he stayed silent. You stared back at Butcher, trying to gather your thoughts, trying to form words, but your head was spinning.

You knew what he was asking, but it felt too much to make that decision right now. You just wanted to rest—a bed, a moment to breathe without fear clawing at your throat.

"Alright, back the fuck off." Ben's voice snapped, breaking through the haze of your thoughts. The tension in the van spiked, and for a second, it looked like he was ready to lunge across the seat at Butcher and knock all of his teeth out. "Can't you see she's been through enough? She doesn't need your bullshit right now."

Butcher's jaw clenched, his eyes narrowing as he met Ben's glare. "We don't have time for second-guessing, mate. It's a very simple question."

Butcher turned his gaze back to you. "You can help us take down Homelander, the bastard who’s got half the world wrapped around his fuckin' finger, or we can take you back home. But no guarantees, yeah? Vought knows about you. They’ll come for you. Eventually."

You swallowed hard, rubbing a hand over your throat, your mind spinning. Home? That word didn't even feel real. Could that place—that cell—even be worthy of being called something like home?

But then again, if you didn't help, could you ever be safe again? For once in a very long time, the choice was yours, but both paths seemed like a death end.

"She needs time." Ben said, his jaw tensing, quietly observing you as if he knew what you were thinking. The hand that he rested on your back made you flinch slightly, causing him to retract it, his fingers curling into a fist.

Your gaze faltered, your eyes dropping to the ground before you managed to look back at Butcher.

A sharp huff escaped Butcher, his patience worn out. “Time's not a luxury we've got. This ain't a charity." He turned toward you, his tone biting. "Again, you can go back to your cozy little cell, I suppose. Vought’ll just find a new use for you.”

"For fuck's sake, she just got out of an shithole." Ben snapped, his voice simmering with anger. "Give her some fuckin' time."

For a moment, Butcher looked like he might argue with some witty comeback, but after a beat, he exhaled sharply, turning his attention back to the road. "Fine. But time's ticking."

The rest of the drive was quiet. You leaned back in your seat, your eyelids heavy, letting your eyes close for just a moment, the noise faded into the background as you let exhaustion win over.

––––

When you reached the destination, Ben helped you out of the van, his movements cautious, his hand warm and solid on your lower back as he guided you inside. The "safe house" was as secure as it was miserable, but right now, that didn't matter. It was shelter, and it was enough.

The others dispersed, Butcher grumbling quietly under his breath as he stalked off to another room, Frenchie and Kimiko greeted you with a wave before leaving too.

Ben, though, lingered by your side, his hand hovering near yours, gently brushing against it for a second, but he didn't dare to reach for you.

"You alright?" he asked, his voice rough but oddly gentle, his gaze never leaving your face. It wasn't something you expected to hear from him—after seeing his quite violent display in the lab, but here he was, looking at you with more concern than anyone else ever had.

You nodded, a small smile curling on your lips, swallowing thickly. "I'm... yeah. Just... tired," you were almost embarrassed by how weak you sounded, but he didn't judge, a faint understanding in his expression.

Hours passed in a tired blur. You had settled into a room, a worn-out bed, but it was better than nothing. Everyone retreated to their own corners of the place for what little rest they could find. You sank into the mattress, your eyes drifting shut almost instantly.

––––

It was sometime past midnight when Ben jolted awake, a cold sweat clinging to his skin, running a shaky hand over his face. The room was pitch dark, save for the faint glow of moonlight outside filtering through the window. He sat up, his heart pounding, the remnants of the dream clinging to him.

Images flashed through his mind—memories of Vought, of his own time in their hands, of the time when he was betrayed, taken away, being tested on, and then frozen for decades. His breathing was ragged, the familiar surge of anger clawing its way to the surface, but something else broke through.

His thoughts drifted to you.

Without really thinking, he got up, slipping out of his room and down the hallway, to the room where you slept. His steps were slow, cautious, not wanting to disturb you.

He hesitated at the doorway to your room, his breath catching when he saw you lying there, on the narrow, uncomfortable bed.

In the dim light, your features were softened, the lines of worry and pain absent. You looked peaceful, your breathing slow and steady, and it eased something in him, his shoulders sagging as the tension slipped away.

Ben took a step into the room, but the floor creaked under his weight, and your eyes snapped open, sitting up on the bed, startled.

"...m'sorry," he whispered, his voice soft but hoarse, like something was bothering him. "Didn’t mean to wake you."

"It’s okay," you murmured, your breathing becoming steady. Your eyes flickered over his face, the lingering pain in his expression catching you off-guard.

You knew that something was wrong, you'd seen that look before, in patients who had been through a lot, in people who had lost themselves along the way.

He hesitated, glancing away, as if embarrassed by his own vulnerability. He looked like he might turn and go back to his own room—but his uneven breathing made him pause. The sight of you was comforting, and that kind look in your eyes made him move closer instead of backing away.

He took a few careful steps closer, almost unsure. "Just wanted to… make sure you were alright," he said, his voice low.

You nodded, your heart still pounding, but not from fear this time, it was something warm. "I’m okay. Just… hard to sleep sometimes."

He nodded, understanding flickering in his eyes. He sank down to one knee, then both, kneeling beside your bed, close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating from him and his slow breaths. For a moment, neither of you spoke, the silence heavy but comforting.

Without thinking, you lifted your hand, resting it gently against the side of his head, your thumb brushing over his temple. His eyes widened, a brief moment of shock crossing his face.

"What are you—?" his eyebrows furrowed in confusion, the touch almost made him wince in pain from how gentle it was. It was like your fingers brushed against some soft spot inside of him, he almost melted.

"It's okay... trust me," you started, trying to reassure him. His eyes met yours, the initial tension easing. He didn't pull away, but instead leaned into your touch in a quiet surrender. "My powers, they'll help," you added softly.

At your voice, his eyes fluttered shut, his expression softening as he exhaled a long, shaky breath. The walls he had built around himself crumbled bit by bit the more he felt your touch.

You hesitated, then began to hum—a soft, gentle melody, barely audible but enough to fill the silence. It felt strange, using your powers willingly again, but different this time... it brought you back to the bittersweet memories of your time before Vought. The tune was simple, soothing, a song you’d sung so many times before. Not destructive, but safe, warm.

As the notes drifted through the air, you felt Ben’s body relax under your touch. His breathing slowed, each exhale deeper, more even, and his hand reached up, covering yours as he pressed your palm closer to his face, silently grounding himself in the warmth of it.

His thumb brushed over the back of your hand, a gentle touch, and he felt something he thought he lost... peace. A kind of comfort that he hadn’t felt in a long, long time. Or something that he thought he'd given up for good, back in the old days, or maybe he'd never had it to begin with.

When your humming finally faded, he stayed there, his hand still covering yours, his eyes still closed. For a second, you thought he might have fallen asleep, but then he spoke, his voice barely a whisper.

"I don’t deserve this," he murmured, his tone laced with a sadness that made your heart ache. "You don't understand what I've... the things that I did."

You shook your head, your hand instinctively wanting to fall from the side of his face but he only held you closer with a conflict—whether he wanted to push you away or pull you into his arms and not let go.

"All I know is that I would've been stuck in that lab if it weren't for you," you whispered, your voice barely audible. "A favor for a favor. I think that's fair."

"Well, it wasn't entirely my choice to break you out," he muttered, that blunt tone of his slipping through, as if it was his last attempt to pull away before sinking too deep.

A soft scoff escaped your lips. "Whatever it was, at least I'm not stuck there anymore."

Slowly, you pulled him up onto the bed beside you, and he let you, his movements careful like he was afraid he might shatter the moment. You shifted, settling so that you were facing him, the blanket fell from your shoulders to pool around your waist, leaving the bruises and scars on your arms exposed under the dim light.

Ben’s gaze traveled over each mark, each scar, but there was no horror in his expression, no pity—only reverence. He reached out, his fingers brushing over a bruise on your shoulder, gentle and careful, as if touching something precious.

"They did this to you," he murmured, a hardness in his voice. It wasn't a question, but a statement. He knew too well.

You nodded, swallowing thickly. "They're fading." you said, looking away for a moment, as if you didn't want to acknowledge the scars.

Without a word, he leaned forward, pressing his lips to the bruise on your shoulder, a feather-light kiss that sent a shiver down your spine.

"Ben...?" you asked hesitantly. The small tremble in your voice made him stop, a flash of worry crossed his face, his teeth biting at his lower lip. He thought he might have overstepped.

"I'm... sorry," he whispered, pulling back. He feared that he had ruined whatever small trust that had begun to form between you.

But your fingers threaded through his hair, hand pressing to the back of his head to bring him closer again. "Stop apologizing," you breathed softly.

His eyes met yours and a small smile threatened to curl up on his lips, a mutual understanding settled between the two of you before his head dipped down to the crook of your neck. His lips brushed against your skin, kissing an old scar, then he kissed another, and another, his mouth trailing over each scar, each bruise, as if he was trying to erase the pain they held. It felt like an apology, like he was mending you.

His touch was careful, almost reverent, and you felt the warmth of each kiss seep into your skin, soothing the ache that lay beneath. You closed your eyes, letting the gentleness of his touch wash over you.

You felt your chest restricting, your breath becoming shallow, you couldn't remember the last time you'd been so taken care of. It was overwhelming, but you didn't want him to stop.

Ben’s hands were rough, calloused from years of fighting, but the way he touched you was anything but. He cupped your face gently, his thumb brushing away the tears that had slipped down your cheek without you even noticing. Then he closed the distance, pressing his lips to your forehead, a kiss so soft, so full of warmth that it made your chest warm and ache at the same time.

"You're safe," he whispered. "You're still here, and I'm with you." It wasn't much, but it was the most reassurance anyone could get out of him.

You leaned into him, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth, and he sighed, his thumb brushing gently over your cheek, his gaze soft and unguarded in a way you hadn't seen before.

Slowly, he pulled you into him, wrapping his arms around you as you settled your forehead against his chest, his heartbeat steady against your ear. You closed your eyes, letting yourself sink into his warmth. For the first time in what felt like forever, you felt safe.

After a long silence, you spoke, your quiet voice breaking the quiet. "Hey... Ben?"

"Yeah?" he replied, his voice a murmur against your hair.

"I'll help you take down Homelander."

[0w0tsuki]

One thing this recent bile that's been spewed at me is just how reactionary the "Transandrophobia" movement is.

Oh hey look it's everyone's favorite transandro bro looking to coddle the dude who called me a "Deranged Hysterical Screeching Wailing Pro Cop Pro Eugenics Victim Racist Ableist Cunt Bitch" because I said "hey don't lie about my friend being a fascist who who wants to genocide nonvoters. No where in her post did she say that where did you even get that?"

The post that's supposedly downplaying transmascs anxiety specifically

Like the most hostility your from this is an irritation at the notion that this is the end of all life forever for trans people. No where is she attempting to downplay the risk. The summary of her statement is "Things are tough. They've been tough before. Don't lose hope and let others control you. There are options even in seemingly hopeless situations and maybe don't kill yourself a". A statement which doesn't call any group out in particular because it's addressed to ALL trans people who are concerned about the election and their hormone access.

And this is the sentiment I've seen from all the trans girls who have been talking about it. Nowhere have I seen transfems attempt to use this as a way to belittle AFABs specifically for being afraid cause guess what? WE'RE SCARED TOO. These posts are an address to a giant of doomerism about the elections that "I'm going to die because Trump is going to take away my hormones and Death before Detransition".

For a group who so commonly accuses trans women being self obsessed and wanting every discourse to be about us, they are incapable of even considering that we might address our own in this. Not only can they not conceive the notion that these are positivity posts meant to elicit hope, they are convinced that we are using this to attack and belittle them specifically. Because in their mind ONLY AFAB people are expressing concerns about being jailed for being trans. Cause it's not like, you know, this is all about an election where the PROGRESSIVES candidate had a history with throwing trans women in men's prisons. What do trans women have to fear of prisons? For a group whose half of their rhetoric is "it's not all about you" they are unable to even fathom that they are not the only ones scared of going to jail for being trans.

You can't even argue this is a straw man because that would imply that there's some fringe Transfem legitimately arguing this that they are using as representative of us as a whole. It can't be a straw man because that would require the physical material of straw to construct it from. They are reverse engineering what our opinion must be from their preconceived notions of us. They are boxing at shadows.

That's why there's no "Unity" with these guys. For all the big game they talk about it they don't WANT unity with us. What they WANT is a bitch to yell at and take the blame whenever something goes wrong in their community. They WANT their whipping girl. I am surely convinced that even if there were no "beaddels", that trans women just shut up about their own oppression forever, these dudes would still be out here twisting the most banal positivity posts aimed at the wider community by trans women, and finding ways to spin it as us attacking them specifically.

[mysicklove-main]

"I could kill you in a heartbeat."

Akaza bites back a smile, turning to you with a blank expression, as if he was annoyed. "Threatening me again?"

You let out a cat-like grin, and he raises his eyebrows, knowing something ridiculous is about to come out of your mouth. "They are thinking about making me a Hashira, ya know. I would be afraid if I were you, Akaza."

You close your eyes, satisfied with your cocky words, and rest your head on his crossed knee. You kick one leg over the other and hum to yourself, waiting for his next words. The mischievous smile hasn't fallen from your face and he's staring at it, his own matching grin pulling at his lips. Your antics always do amuse him, whether he likes it or not.

"What a strange thing for them to do, all considering you haven't touched a Nichirin sword in your puny lifetime." He places the tip of his finger on your jaw, the sharp, red nail slightly digging into your skin. A small reminder that he is a demon, and you are not. Probably another ridiculous act of physical dominance that you couldn't be bothered by.

You aren't phased by his strange actions anymore. The way he kisses you and purposely bites your lip to show off his fangs, the way his grip on your wrist sometimes is just a little too hard, or when he truly does get upset and shows you just a glimpse of what his opponents see that sends a shiver down your spine. He is trying to scare you, probably away from him.

You love him too much to go anywhere, even if he is afraid of himself. What is best is to ignore it, he seems to relax whenever you don't react to it. Act normal. You hold onto the finger with your own and continue to poke fun at him. "Way to ruin the mood. Mentioning how much older you are than me, you pervert."

"Deflecting now, are we?" He says, now tapping on your cheek. He seems to relax again and instead indulges your words.

You sigh dramatically. "I guess it can't be helped. I am in love with a pervert. And a demon non the less."

He scoffs at you, but he's smiling. You can hear it in the tone of his voice. "You are of age, stop whining. Besides, don't act like you didn't cling to me first. Maybe I'm the one getting taken advantage of. "

You gasp at him, and he barks a small laugh. He exposes his fangs, and his eyes hold a light in them. He is always pouting, it's nice to see him smile every once in a while.

"Sorry you know I have a thing for men who have blue-striped di—"

A hand covers your mouth in an instant and he shakes his head, as if disappointed. "And you think I'm the pervert."

You lick the palm of his hand and he pulls away with a disgusted groan. His snide comment makes you laugh, and play into it. "You know I can't help it with you."

He peers at you with amusement, but his mouth remains in a hard line. "You're gross."

"You love it."

He blinks at you and stares for a long second as if he was assessing your face. The corners of his mouth creep upward, and he lets out a breathless sigh. "Yeah. Guess so."

[boysluts]

Sanji is quite the talker, isn't he?

..intentional, or not, you can't help but find how amusing it is overhearing him rant about how perfect women are.

Amusing as it is, it makes you wonder if he'd be into a boy, A boy like you anyway.. Unlike sanji you're not very talkative you're rather shy around most, you're excellent in battle, of course

You're extremely knowledgeable like Robin too, so.. that's cool..you guess..

You're also a very talented dancer, if you don't say so yourself!

All these things you may be, but none of them are what you're wanting to be.

It's stupid, and hopeless you think.

Is there any reason you should be chasing a man that is most definitely straight? What will you benefit from loitering around and getting your heart broken?

What the fuck. Love is so hard, it's so confusing, it's annoying.

It's pointless, he doesn't know you, you'd be surprised if he'd know your favourite colour.

Which would be a shocker anyway, seeing as he has no need to study you as you do him.

Fuck him.

Fuck his adoring personality.

Fuck his godforsaken body.

Fuck his pretty face.

..You'd definitely fuck him...

Sometimes you wonder how much of a manic idiot you look to robin, groping your hair out of your skull and silent screaming..probably RIDICULOUS.

Vinsmoke Sanji, Fuck you. Stupid lover boy.

....

What you don't know, or notice because your a hopeless romantic, is that Sanji is often times watching over you.

Any sudden movement you make his eyes follow

..just..to....make sure you don't hurt yourself! Because why else would he be staring at you? Hahahahah.. he doesn't swing that way..

He doesn't swing that way, but he does as a matter of fact know your favourite colour.

He doesn't swing that way, but he adores the pink tint that appears on your cheeks when he slings his arm over your shoulder.. or looks into your eyes while he expresses his interest in a new recipe he's found..

He doesn't swing that way, but, why can't he stop thinking of you?

He doesn't swing that way, but why can't he fight the fact he DOES want you? And not just in a friend's way..

Vinsmoke Sanji that stupid lover boy, He doesn't swing that way, but he would definitely fuck you too.

☆

I'm sorry this is like.. so dookie, but I'm so bored & no one really requests anything so I've just gotta scorch things up from somewhere.. over the rainbow! I'm glad people actually come to enjoy the few things I've posted . . . And y'all shouldn't be afraid of requesting things.. though, I do understand, I don't even post allat much (I NEED IDEAS PLEASE FEED ME 🙁🙁)

Anyway! Have a good day, evening afternoon or night wherever you are! — and thank you from stumbling across this blog ♡

[nonbinarylocalcryptid]

Astyanax procrastinates a little that thing about going to save his baba in the same very way I'm procrastinating my thesis a little

Enjoy the snippet

Astyanax was afraid.

He was just a boy after all, so he postponed his departure from Troy a few hours. Enough time to eat something, gather his belongings and clear his head.

He cooked whatever fish he had left, sit at the beach, looking at where the city once stand, lost in thought.

"Would you be so kind to share some food with these old man?"

The boy jumped and coughed, as the bite he was chewing almost shock him.

"I didn't mean to scare you." Said the gray haired man.

"And somehow I believe you". Answered Astyanax. "Please sit with me and suit yourself, if not, it would go to waste."

"That would be tragic."

"Indeed."

The stranger took a site at the other side of the little fire, yet Astyanax didn't pay much mind, distracted as he was. That didn't mean he wasn't ready to run away at the very first sign of danger from the old man, but sharing a fish wasn't much of an effort.

The Trojan ruins stood tall in the distance, making Astyanax sad for something he couldn't quiet place. Can you be sad for something you don't remember? Is there such thing as homesickness for a place that was never home? And yet he had spent a week alone wandering in his homeland, and he had known peace there.

"Did you know that those walls were built by Poseidon and Apollo themselves?" The old man's voice brought him back.

"I can't say I have heard that story," replied Astyanax with amusement, "would you tell me more?"

"Would you accept it as payment for the meal?"

"The meal was given freely, but you can pay with your story if that's your wish." Assured the kid.

The old man had a soft expression when he looked at the walls, Astyanax dared to think that he saw something similar to pride in his eyes.

"For irrelevant reasons to this story", started the man, "the two gods were punished by Zeus to live as mortals for a year, and looked for work here, at Troy. The king at that moment wasn't a fair man, and ignorant to the fact he was treating with gods, he only hired the two of them to build the walls."

"That's definitely some shitty behaviour right there."

"Language."

"Right, sorry. Please keep going."

"The king gave them a year to complete the work, but they did not relent. Poseidon was skilled in the ways of the rock, and Apollo was a diligent work partner. Together, they make the walls grow more and more everyday. The year passed and there was only a thin gap in the wall that could have been done in an hour, but the king said the work wasn't completed in time so there was no payment. And the gods left."

"Let me guess," said Astyanax, with a mischievious smile, "because Zeus' sentence was over, they have regained their power, and make the king face the consequences of his actions."

"You're correct, more or less." The old man confirmed. "I remember when Troy was in its full glory, what a beautiful place it was."

"I don't know, maybe." Melancholy was back in Astyanax's face.

"What's wrong? You are young, but your eyes are old, my boy."

"I...I guess that's a good way to put it. I was born at the war", confessed Astyanax, "but I'm too young to remember Troy, or anything related."

"And yet, here you are."

"Not by choice." Muttered the kid to himself, the old man heard him, but didn't say anything. "Did Apollo came back to Troy?"

"He did," answered the old man, "he sided with the Trojans. The Acheans had disrespect him, and Zeus was telling him to do so." When he said that, Astyanax snorted. "What's so funny about it?

"It's just...the gods, they are gods, yes, but they are also... people, emotional people. I'm sure he even cursed the Achean Camp, just to because he could."

"Something like that."

"See? People."

"Maybe you're right."

"Talking about people, were you there? At the war?"

"I was," the answer was concise, "why?"

"Did you ever meet Hector of Troy?"

There was a silence.

"You could say that, why the question?"

"Could you tell me what was he like?"

"Wise," the answer came quickly, "he was wise, and honourable. He was trying to do the right thing in a time no one was listening." The old man stood up, having finished his food. "I'll leave you to it, thanks for the company, and the meal."

"Thanks you for the stories." Replied Astyanax.

Despite his own words, the old man made no move to leave.

"Your bow, did you make it?"

"Yes, I did, why?"

"It's a good bow, I'm sure every arrow you shoot with it will land right in its target."

"Thank you, that's so kind..." Astyanax stopped talking, because somehow, while he was looking at his bow, the old man had disappeared. " Of you."

He shook his head, trying to calm himself. He was sure he didn't imagine the encounter, the fishbones the stranger had taken out of his food were still there, in a little neat pile. Even the sand where he were was disrupted.

Whatever, he was no threat and meant no harm. Astyanax finished his meal and stood up to put out the fire.

He had spent enough time among ghosts, time to go looking for the living.

[astral-realities]

Hello again! New questions bc im really curious! How much do you all identify with your puppets and their appearances? Are they more of a tool for you or are they significant for your sense of self? I've noticed that your appearances somewhat reflect your personalities, was this a design choice made by your architects or have you been adjusting looks along the way by yourselves? (I know Habitually Stargazing did a little, the dress looks really pretty on you btw!) Im particularily fascinated by the antennas! Im guessing you don't use them much having a hard-wire connection to the rest of your superstructures, right? (perhaps they would be more practical when communicating with visitors in your chambers? I don't know..) Im seeing a sort of analogy between animal motifs in ancient art and masks and those retro-looking antenna resembling those used with older technology, though I might be wrong.. I'd be thrilled to know whether these hold any cultural / traditional signifincance among machines alike!

Also I'd love to know more about your serial numbers! What do they mean, and do you more identify with them or with your names?

Finally, Flowers - a creature for you

It's an umbrella slug, hiding under it's umbrella!

Hope you all have a wonderfull day, looking forward to hear from you!

SDA: Oh! While the exact details might vary from case to case, I would say that it's a bit of both - the puppet is a tool tied to an iterator's sense of self.

SDA: The puppet is only a small part of yourself, but it represents you as a whole. You .. used it to communicate with your citizens, you use it to communicate with your peers. Others start to see *you* in this form. The more you use it, the more you begin to identify with it. With time, its image truly becomes yours.

SDA: From our creators' perspective, it might have been a matter of needing an interface to interact with us. It seemed to be more natural to speak with something that you can actually look in the face.

SDA: Another important fact is that the puppet is by far the most expressive part of our bodies. Our biological elements can be somewhat controlled by our programming, but it cannot fully override them - there will always be a living, sentient being deep below.

SDA: One that has its own emotions, preferences, opinions; one that wants to express itself. The puppet serves as an outlet for that. It can gesticulate, it allows you to convey how you feel in a way that's understandable to most.

TFB: It would've probably been easier for them if we couldn't think for ourselves. Just tell us what to do and we do it until the end of time, no questions asked.

TFB: Instead, they chose to fully depend on something with an *attitude*! Some really tried their best to keep good relations with their iterator, afraid of putting it in a bad mood...

SDA: Yes, I suppose...

SDA: Some of us might pay greater attention to the puppet's appearance, adjusting it to our own tastes, mostly with clothes and accessories. Fashion was important in our creators' culture, so it wasn't out of the ordinary for an iterator to request a new robe or a necklace. Some took matters into their own hands.

SDA: ... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ramble on like this.

BROS: Don't you dare, it's always nice hearing you so passionate about something~

BROS: About the antennae - you're right, they're not as powerful as the equipment in the rest of the structure! They're decent for close-range stuff, and they're what you'd resort to in case of an emergency.

BROS: Like, somehow losing access to the rest of your body. The puppet can't do much on its own, but thanks to these, it would be able to communicate with anything near it.

BROS: Aaand they were mostly another way for the architect to visualize whatever concept they had for a puppet.

HS: I'm almost offended by the "retro" remark. As far as I'm concerned, these are state-of-the-art.

BROS: Sure, sure~

BROS: Finally, as for the model numbers. They represent the architect's name, the cycle when the project was officially completed, and the name of the project at that time, like this:

BROS: Nobody really identifies with this, it's mostly used in paperwork - maybe some database stuff. Even if two iterators were given the same name, it's extremely unlikely they also had the same creator *and* creation date, so it allows for telling us apart that way.

HS: The name that appears in your model number isn't truly binding either. Such as...

TFB: Come on now, don't put them on the spot like that.

SDA: ...

SDA: It's fine...

SDA: Originally, I was called "Visions of Serenity", you'll see me in databases as GTIAOT672005VOS.

SDA: I was renamed shortly after, due to some... rather unfortunate coincidence.

SDA: It really doesn't matter now.

---

TFB: Also, thank you so much!! I don't get to see many marine species around these parts, this is lovely!

HS: (...and thank you...)

[hirschkuh-im-traum]

We'll meet again

the plot is: (Y/n) made a pact with Alastor, so now she will be protected from any men. (Y/n) got into trouble and everybody will see her new power. Alastor feels like he want to protect (Y/n).

tw: blood, murder and all like this

english is not my mother-tounge, so I'm very-very sorry about the mistakes I must have made :'<

also, sorry for a stupid plot (the wedding is just awful)

Part two, the power

(Y/n) came back home. In the hall her mother stopped her, "What has happened to you?!"

She guessed how awful she looked: dirty dress and shoes, messy hair, pale face. She still had trails of tears after goodbying with the demon, but a wild smile stretched on her face, because she was happy to had his protection. She felt herself more confident. She almost looked down on others.

But her mother didn't notice her strange expression, she only saw her shabby appearance.

"Nothing," (Y/n) replied, "I was just walking in the forest. You know, I like it."

Her mother looked at her like at an alien.

"You're better go upstairs and to wash yourself!"

"Sure."

(Y/n) noticed her father. He was sitting in an armchair, reading local newspaper. Well, it wasn't actually local, but it was about the nearest inhabited location.

He stared at something under her feet. It was her shadow. He definitely noticed it was darker that other shadows in the room. But he didn't say anything. It was too strange to be talked about.

When (Y/n) came to the stairs, her mother said, "You know, you won't do your forest strolls when you get married."

(Y/n) stopped.

"When I what?" she thought and turned to her mother, "Why do you think I will ever be married?"

"Your hand was asked," She answered.

"Who could be so nut?" (Y/n) smirked, hiding her fear behind sarcasm.

Her mother said the name. The name of the man, she ran away from a few hours ago.

Everything around (Y/n) began to whirl. It felt like a nightmare, very similar to reality but still very different. When you know that something is wrong but can't change anything. Like a parallel universe, what you know you don't belong, but don't know the way back home.

(Y/n) grasped the handrail to not to fall.

"Your father and I think you're very lucky to have someone like him," Her mother said, "you should not say " No."

(Y/n) was thinking. She knew why her parents thought so. (Y/n) was from an old family, just like that man. It was a good match. But (Y/n) never wanted to be married. She read about love, and sometimes she wished she had it. But her will for freedom was stronger. Moreover, she felt that no men in the world deserved her.

She stood her back to parents, and they couldn't see the change of her expression. Fear changed into despair, despair into anger, anger into sadness and after all she smiled. It was the biggest smile of her in a long time. We have such a smile in foretaste of revenge. When we feel their suffering and despair, that fill us with almost voluptuously pleasure.

She smiled widely. She could take a revenge on him. A revenge on every man. She didn't feel afraid anymore. She looked at her dark shadow and smiled more.

"I feel like something strange may happen..." She said in a low voice.

"What do you mean, (Y/n)?"

She turned to her mother, shaking her head and said, "Nothing! Nothing, Mother. Let's make it as fast as we can."

(Y/n) sat before her dressing table, putting on face powder. She liked to make her skin pale. It looked very gorgeous with the colour of her hair. She put on her dark red lipstick. Now Carmilla looked at her from the mirror and smiled with her white teeth.

"Young mistress," A maid said, "you look very beautiful."

"Thank you, Pulchra," Replied (Y/n).

"May I say something, mistress?" Pulchra asked after a while, when (Y/n) was brushing her hair.

"Sure."

"I thought you will never get married."

(Y/n) smiled.

"Not because you're bad, no!" Pulchra hastened to add, "I just thought that you're not interested in it. In love, I mean. Of course, it's also a very profitable marriage, but cupidity is even more out of your character. I just don't understand..."

(Y/n) looked at her thought the reflection in the mirror. (Y/n) noticed that since the day she made the deal, the maid turned out to be more careful in communication with her mistress. She could say that everybody in the house avoided meeting her. If she ran into someone of the servant in the corridor, they hurried to hide in the nearest room or just stopped at the wall, waiting her to pass by. (Y/n) didn't know, if it was because of her new shadow. She felt more confident, she felt the power inside of her; it was all reflected on her face and in her gait. In actual fact, none of the servants knew the reason of their dread of the one who was kind to them once. She was always kind and she respected everyone from a gardener and a maid to a butler. But now something about her frightened them. It was not a customary to talk about these reasons. If somebody dared to talk about the change in their mistress, they could feel that somebody was watching them. Chill ran down their spines, and some even told that they heard a characteristic ckracle of a radio, witch, they were sure, was not in the room.

Only her father and Pulchra knew the reason, yet never spoke about it to anyone.

They were afraid.

They didn't understand.

They didn't understand how it was possible to have a darker shadow then others. It was just abnormal. And they also were scared of her smile, that played on her thin lips, every time she noticed them scrutinizing her shadow.

(Y/n) used to take Pulchra as an elder sister, and she felt a bit sorry to cause such a fear in her. But she wasn't sure, that Pulchra wasn't participating in her marriage, because she was that maid who entered the room in the moment of harassment.

Her face didn't express any worry that moment; Pulchra seemed to be ready to close the door, if only (Y/n) hadn't cried her name. Then the door was opened wider, shining a light down on (Y/n).

"What do they all want from me?" thought (Y/n). "And would she really close that door? Maybe she thought that that man was my lover? But didn't she just say, that I wasn't interested in love?"

(Y/n) wasn't sure she'd like to know all the truth. It was typical of her not to think too much, about what was on others minds. She just returned them, what she thought they deserved.

"Don't worry, Pulchra, I know what I do," (Y/n) said with a small smile, holding a comb to the maid. "Don't think, I betray myself doing this."

The maid secured her hair at the back of her head with several pins and secured the point de venise veil.

(Y/n) stood opposite her groom. She hated him. He couldn't see her sizzling eye of Medusa behind the veil. Her dress was decorated with pearls, diamonds and a rich embroidery. The collar was high, almost touching her ears, in which small pearls shone. Milky white fabric covered all her body, only her hands were naked. All her appearance radiated grace and power.

The light in the church was dim. It was a very foggy day, and the church was barely lighted by the candles.

Her groom couldn't help but be nervous. He was swearing during all the ceremony. He couldn't understand why a woman scared him so much. Just a bride, wasn't she? Maybe it was because she didn't hold out her hands him? Or is it because of this strange expression under the veil? He couldn't see it, but he felt it. And there was also something strange under her feet. The man blamed the weak light for the too dark shadow of his bride.

His smile was strained as the priest read out well-known words. And then the priest asked the questions.

"Yes," Said the groom.

Everybody turned to (Y/n).

But she kept silent.

Everybody was waiting. Did this girl want to attract attention? It wasn't in her style. And why had the veil not yet been removed from her face? The groom tried to reach her hands but couldn't somehow.

Atmosphere had changed. Everything became darker.

"I told you, something strange might happen," (Y/n) murmured that nobody could hear her.

And then something actually happened.

The light in the church fell in such a way, that only the priest could see the (Y/n)'s and the groom's shadows. And he saw how a grimace appeared in the bride's shadow. It slowly creeped to the groom's one and grasped it. The priest could perfectly see it, because her shadow had a deeper shade of black then others ones.

When the female dark figure grasped the male shadow, the groom changed his expression. There was a pain in his face. And he was still staring at his bride.

The priest saw how her shadow began to tear the groom's shadow apart, and he saw, the groom started to bleed. In the place where her shadow touched his shadow, wounds appeared on the groom's body.

Everybody could only see the man getting red, while the priest could see a fight between shadows.

The bride stood still. She glanced from under her veil at the man's suffering and enjoied it. She loved hearing everybody's gasps of shock.

Suddenly the groom fell dead, when all of his face was red and the suit soaked with blood. A pool of blood became bigger under him and reached (Y/n). She didn't step away, letting her dress soak up the blood.

She saw how the priest was shaking.

And suddenly her shadow grew bigger, it stretched up to the ceiling, causing everyone's scream. It smiled wild, eyes burned, hands stretched aside as it wanted to embrace everyone.

"I'd like to warn you that this shadow has quite a cruel character!" She remembered.

Could it kill everyone in the church? Well, only if she let it. But this shadow liked to frighten people out of existence.

A chaos filled the church. Everybody screamed, some women cried; most people ran to the exit; some people fell and others tried to help them get up, but they also fell, knocked down by crowd mad with fear.

(Y/n) was infected with their fear, although she knew she had nothing to be afraid of.

The priest ran by the dead body and turned to (Y/n).

"You-" He pointes a shaking finger at her.

"Who?"

He couldn't see her face, but he heard her smile.

He ran out of the church.

(Y/n) raised her head. She picked up the hem of her dress, that soaked with blood, and quickly ran out though the backdoor.

She was running through the forest again, embraced with the fog that was much stronger than last time. The wind lifted her veil and threw it back as it was her actual groom.

This time (Y/n) didn't feel despair or fear. She felt free. Last time she rushed, always stumbling over the roots; the Nature was her refuge and It aggressively pulled her in Its arms. But now It was gentler. The wind softly played with her hair, the fog hugged her, bare branches whispered the congratulations to her.

(Y/n) felt like she found herself, like she found home finally.

She slowed down and went onto a path. She lowered the hem and looked around.

She was waiting for him.

She knew he would appear.

Just a thought of meeting him soon made her face blushed.

She walked farther when she heard a rustle on the left.

She turned her head to the source of the noise and saw a familiar red figure in the woods.

(Y/n) gasped and left the path. Heels of her white shoes drowned in the soft ground covered with yellow and brown leaves. She didn't take eyes of Alastor even for a moment. He disappeared and then appeared again between the tall trees, yet he stood still.

When she came closer, he showed his teeth in a smile and didn't disappear again.

"I'm ever so glad to see you again, my dear," Alastor said.

"Me too," Said (Y/n) with a big soft smile, "Thank you!"

Alator raised his eyebrows, "For what, my dear?"

"You've released me."

He chuckled, "Usually, they tell me opposite, dear hahaha" He glanced at her with a mysterious gaze, "They tell me I captivated them."

"That too," She thought.

Incredible how bad she wanted to meet him again, but now she was just speechless. She was sure, she wanted to tell him something, but all the subjects for conversation seemed stupid. She looked at him, waiting until the right words would come to her mouth.

"What are you going to do now, my dear?" Alastor asked.

She blinked.

"Um, I think there is no place for me here now haha" She stroke her hair. "The priest, I believe, takes me as a witch now, what I find quite flattering."

The demon smiled softly at her.

"I think, I'm going to move. New Orleans maybe..."

He looked at her with a surprise.

"Why is it, dear?"

"Well, it's far away from this place and I also heard it's kinda a black magic city, isn't?"

"Why, yes, dear, it is! I think my hometown suits you very well," He said.

"Your hometown?"

"Not all demons come from the hell, darling," He chuckled, "I was a human once and lived in New Orleans."

She asked several questions about his human life. Alastor's face shone with happiness when he reminded his human life. He told her, that he was a radio host (so that was why his voice was static like) and also a serial killer.

(Y/n) enjoyed listening him when he told her about his mother, job and favorite local dishes. She loved seeing happiness in his face.

"I'm definitely going to New Orleans," She thought.

Suddenly she understood something strange.

"By the way, Alastor," She drew his attention. His name tasted very special on her tongue. "Well, I somehow knew, you would appear, but still... How have you appeared here without my summoning?"

He leaned over her, "Oh, my dear, don't stuff your pretty head with such tricklish questions. That's my business to care, not yours."

"Alright, whatever you say."

He saw that he wasn't satisfied with this answer.

"Well, my dear, it's just seems that a demon, who made a pact with a human, should be with them from time to time." His smile turned out to be strained, "A little bit annoying, but what can I do."

She felt depressed that he didn't want to be here. (Y/n) didn't thought it was because of her (she respected herself too much, and thought everybody did so.) She thought he didn't enjoy to much of being here, on earth, because he had a lot of things to do. How much business could a devil have? Well, it wasn't the question she wanted to ask him. (Y/n) had another one.

"Um, Alastor," His name still felt forbidden to be said aloud, "when shall we meet again? And how? And where..?"

He touched his chin with his index finger in reflection. He was thinking.

"My dear," He said finally, "I think you need to decide it."

"I don't wanna be a burden for you-"

"My dear!" Alastor interrupted her, "You're not! Anyone but you! No no no, dearest!" He looked at her slightly covered his eyelids. "I find it very entertaining to help you with your desire."

It didn't sound like a compliment. It looked more like a hunter boasted of his hard but succeeded hunting; like he was describing his hunt for a game like a very dangerous, yet pleasant entertainment. But (Y/n) decided to take it as a compliment. It was easier that way.

She lowered her gaze, softly smiling. Did he really never thought about her as a burden? Well, she said about the burden, trying to be polite and to endear him. But she was already dear to him.

"I just wanted to say, that I'm always glad to see you, really, but I don't want to bother you..." She thought she sounded stupid, but she wanted to be frank with him, "So, I believe we can meet anytime you wish."

He looked at her with astonishment. Did she say a demon's line? It was a demon's work to fulfil a human's wish. And only like that. No human could fulfil a demon's desires. And if she was just polite, then why did she decide to be so towards him and not towards other people? She hated people so much. They only brought her pain. They betrayed her. Could he be different from them? Could he be kind to her?

"Well, my dear, you do surprise me!" Alastor said with a chuckle, "but how about this? I will be by you anytime you wish the most. Not just need me, you have my shadow for this, but when you want me to be by you."

She looked at him with her eyes wide opened.

"Then, I wish you now."

He slowly tipped his head, looking at her.

(Y/n) didn't realize when she came closer to him. She looked at her feet. She touched his fingers gently and he took her by the hand. His palm was much bigger than hers, and she felt herself very small by his side.

"My little human girl doesn't want to say goodbye?" He asked her; his voice became lower and she perfectly heard a soft radio crackle.

"She doesn't," (Y/n) said, still lowering her head.

He softly made her look up at him, taking her by her chin. Her eyes were wet. What beautiful eyes! Alastor could see branches reflected in them. Birds were flying in the sky, and her eyes were the sky. This young woman actually longed for his presence. She trusted him. What a lost girl. She really felt herself more comfortable with him, The Radio Demon, than with people.

Alastor felt aching in his chest. He hated everyone who hurt her. He wanted to take revenge even more than she did, because for the sake of others we're ready to do more than for ourselves.

He needed to protect her.

He softly ran his finger over her cheek, and she clung to his palm as a cat. She closed her eyes.

It was just a twinkling.

(Y/n) opened her eyes and moved away.

Her face was severe again.

"Goodbye, Alastor." She said in a low voice.

"We'll meet again, my dear."

"I know."

A minute ago (Y/n) was alone in the woods again.

guys, i'm very very sorry it took so long, I had a very busy week at university fakultet of philology feels like hell sometimes _(:< 」∠)_

Thank you so much for reading my works, for liking them, reposting!! it means a lot to me, to know that somebody likes what i do <3

stay tuned, the third part will be soon if my instructor in lexicology won't kill me with his new tasks in german

[ww2yaoi]

if web had gotten wounded in the patrol how do you think joe would've reacted? cause we all know (= like to think) he was worried about web in that one scene with the whistler, but idk how he would've acted on his worries had they come true🤔 would it depend on how serious the wound was? would he feel even more resentment cause web just got back and got hurt again and was once again to rest while they all have to keep working? if that was the case would the relief that he didn't die like jackson overshadow this resentment? idk i feel like i don’t know him well enough like you do to imagine this😭

first of all, I'm very amused that you think I'm some sort of joe liebgott whisperer. like we watched the same show don't doubt yourself and your interpretations </3 but yeah I guess I have been studying the blade for a while

okay. is it too much of a cop out to say yes literally all of that is going on inside of joe at once? but yeah, it would depend on the kind of wound web got because that would probably change the scenario. I guess I'll give you two answers then:

scenario 1: the wound is another clean, superficial million dollar wound like the one web got in holland

I think joe is more likely to be resentful and angry in this scenario. like you said, web hasn't been on the line as much compared to the other guys. they haven't had a proper break in months. while obviously getting wounded isn't fun, web had been lucky to miss out on bastogne. I think part of joe is constantly wrestling with his deep bitterness over web not being there to help them out and experience the misery he experienced and his relief that web wasn't there. because let's face it, he wouldn't wish that kind of shit on anyone. the way I characterize joe is he's in a constant push and pull with his very real firy resentment and his good heart. he has a lot of internal conflict because he's so angry (and traumatized) that it causes him to lash out. but later I think he regrets it because he's a kind person with a gentleness and generosity that's innate to his character

so, on the surface, yes, he would be very angry that web is getting out of it yet again. but I think another part of him would be glad because maybe this means web gets out of the war, if not unscathed, then at least alive. after all, web did get joe out of the patrol, and he was trying to prove himself in part because of how joe treated him. who knows, maybe if web hadn't stuck out his neck joe could've been the one who had gotten hit or killed. joe knows this. obviously, he would be pissed that web was leaving yet again (and I could talk about joseph "abandonment issues" liebgott all day) but I think his anger would burn bright and hot and quick and eventually his feelings of guilt and sadness would probably overtake it. I think joe and web would work things out eventually there would just be some hurt feelings as per usual with them... they don't communicate for shit or say what they mean because they're both scared and out of their depth and trying to uphold their facades because they care so much what the other thinks of them but they can't know it blah blah blah

scenario 2: the wound is serious, life-threatening, web might not die but he's in bad shape

I think joe is less likely to be angry or resentful in a scenario where web is hurt badly and genuinely in danger. I think he'd be pretty upset honestly and feel guilty over how he'd been treating web those past couple days. I think he'd also be afraid that his behaviour pushed web towards proving himself on the patrol and might've been the reason why web got hurt. however, I think joe would rather chew glass than express any of this to anyone, let alone web, which would cause him to be very touchy and stressed out and he'd probably still lash out in some ways.

I had a convo about this scenario with tierney/@kbsd and we talked about how joe would probably do other things to show he cares because he's such an actions over words kind of guy. he can't admit his feelings whatsoever. anyways, we thought it'd be a funny scenario if joe was always hovering around the hospital (say they're back in mourmelon and web is being treated there) and he keeps pissing off the nurses with his presence because he's checking up on web and bringing him the newspaper and like pestering the doctors about when web's bandages were last changed when web is asleep and can't hear it and just being a jerk and a nuissance and they're like can you please go away jesus fucking christ

anyways, I kind of lost the plot did this even answer your question at all

[nekohime19]

Heart behind the lie # 29 : Sworn brother

Wukong is still jelly

There was a tense silence veiling the room, only broken by Mei's uncontrollable laughter. MK awkwardly patted her back (to help her, or to stop her was still questionable), sheepishly looking at everyone that watched her as if she was struck by madness, she might as well be, this wasn't a very laughable situation, thought the sage. 

Sun Wukong tapped deep within himself to not let anger overwhelm him, breathing like his master showed him long ago, trying to not tear the peacock to shreds. He could feel the fearful gazes of the lord's servant, all willing to protect him (something that spoke of a good lord) but ultimately afraid of the great sage, too afraid to step forward. 

“I think I might have misheard.” Muttered Macaque, an obvious lie for a being like himself, he cleared his throat and straightened himself. “It's rare for me to misheard, so I'm giving you another chance to repeat yourself.” This was a clear warning, a chance for the foolish peacock to correct his words, to avoid the bloodbath Sun Wukong would unleash upon him. 

“I think I was clear? The deal is simple, I give you the lantern piece, and in exchange you marry me.” Repeated Cheng, hands on his hips, expression amused, as if he was looking at unfocused children. Sun Wukong gritted his teeth, tail lashing on the floor. 

“This is ridiculous!” Yelled the sage, he threw his arms in the air, appalled by the very existence of such a deal, and glared at the peacock. “You can't force someone to marry you because nobody wants to!”

“First of all, I am a very eligible suitor, mind you.” Huffed the peacock as he showed off his trail, the jade-green feathers long and perfectly groomed, the eyes shining like jewelry. “Second, who are you to decide for the Six-eared Macaque? Are you his mate? One of his suitor?”

“I-I'm…” The sage stuttered, face reddening. 

“He's my friend.” Replied the warrior as he glared at the peacock, fangs showing a bit.

“So he's just a friend. He doesn't have a say in this matter then.” Chuckled Cheng, Sun Wukong was trying very hard to not murder him. 

“He's… he’s special.” Weakly muttered the macaque, his own face reddening. The sage's tail swished happily at that, and he restrained the smitten coo tickling his lips. He also ignored the kids’ awing. Yes, he was special. He was the friend that Macaque could kiss, that had to be special. 

“Special? Dear, I do not mind if you're sleeping with the Monkey King, you can even take him as your lover if you want. I am very open minded.” Sun Wukong's face bursted in a furious red, he opened his mouth, but only gibberish came out. Mei's laughter became even louder. Macaque was dumbfounded once again, not any better than the King, his own face rivaling strawberries. 

“Lord Cheng, sir ?” Tentatively cut the scholar once he regained his footing. “I don't think Macaque's relationship with Monkey King is the problem. If I may ask-”

“You may.” Cut the peacock while he turned towards the fumbling scholar. 

“Why do you wish to marry Macaque?” Carefully asked Tang. 

“I need a partner.” Replied Cheng in a huff, as if it was an incredibly obvious answer. 

“Why?”Insisted the scholar. 

“... I guess you people did not come for the festival. Very well, I will explain. The former King of this city, the venerable Thousands-Winged Owl, passed away without siring any children, and without any close family. In his will, he designed the three lords that were in his service, the Stone-eyed Peacock, the Golden-clawed Crow, and the Serpent-tongued Dove, as heirs. For the throne they will compete in what the King called the dawning festival. It is basically a huge party he organized for his death, inviting everyone he knew, and everyone that wished to come. The rules for us lords are simple, we will not be the one competing against each other, it will be our partners. They will compete in three trials, one involving loyalty, the other wit, and the last one strength, nobody except the King advisor knows anything beyond that. The winner will be given the throne.”

“The guy organized a wife battle.” Snorted the dragon girl. 

“In short, yes.” Laughed Cheng. 

“In this case Macaque is not the most suitable candidate for your situation. He is weakened, he will not do well in the strength trial.” Explained the Bull's son. 

“Are you? Now, that is unfortunate, especially for someone as precious as you. I can accommodate you for your stay here if you wish.” Sun Wukong did not like how precious sounded on the peacock’s lips. 

“I… thanks?” Whispered the warrior, unsure of how to take the lord's kindness. 

“Maybe you can marry someone else?”Tentatively proposed his mentee. 

“Hm, do state all of your names and clans.” Ordered the peacock. 

“Hm, I'm Tang? I'm human.”

“Pigsy. I don't have a clan, I'm a chef.”

“Red Son of the terrific Bull clan. Heir to the Demon Bull King, son of Princess Iron Fan.”

“Mei, part of the dragon of the east clan!”

“I'm MK, I'm not sure what a clan is?”

“My successor.” Clarified Sun Wukong with a growl. 

“In that case, I cannot marry any of you. The mortal will be too weak, the chef too. Even if we ignore the fact that you three are kids, I don't want to anger any of your families. And I cannot marry Sun Wukong, he's a King, more powerful than me, if I marry him I'll have to follow him in his kingdom. Furthermore, I can feel his murderous intent.” 

“At least you're aware of it.” Huffed the sage as he crossed his arms. 

“Is it really specified that your partner must be your wife?” Asked Tang with furrowed eyebrows. 

“The will says exactly : the one bound to you by an oath. Marriage is the easiest oath to make.” 

Tang lit up at that. 

“Well maybe sworn-brotherhood can do then!” Exclaimed the scholar. “Normally, sworn-brotherhood does not need any formal oath, but we can do one for this occasion.”

“Maybe, it could work. Who will be my sworn-brother then?” They all turned towards the sage, Sun Wukong stuttered, caught off guard, and turned away. 

“No way!” Shouted the King. 

“Don't make this difficult, King.” Groaned the pig. 

“You are the strongest, the most likely to win.” Retorted the Bull's son. 

“You don't have to if you don't want to.” Calmly replied the macaque, resolution blooming in his gaze. The sage sighed when he caught sight of this unrelenting gaze. He really didn't want to be associated in any way to this bastard of a peacock, but he didn't want Macaque to be associated with him either. 

“Okay, okay, I'll do it. I'll be the peacock sworn-brother.” Grumbled the sage, his voice becoming more poisonous at the word peacock. 

“Wonderful, Sun Wukong is certainly powerful enough to seal my victory!”Cheered the peacock, he turned towards the King and asked : “What are you wearing?”

“Hm, hoodie and sweatpants? With shades?”

“Prosperous! What are you, rat man? Servants ! Give this monkey proper clothing, take him to Bolin, I refuse to let my sworn-brother be anything less than beautiful! We will do the oath when he's ready!” The lord turned away. “Mui!”

“Yes, my lord!” Replied the parrot. 

“Take the rest of them to their rooms, give them anything they ask for, especially our dearest shadow!”

“Of course, my lord.” The parrot, or Mui, bowed to her lord and walked towards the group. 

“Ah Lam! Take the lantern piece! We will trade when the deal is sealed!” One of the tallest guards approached MK and softly reached out, his mentee hesitated a little, but finally relented the piece. The peacock disappeared in his bathroom, aided by a few of his guards to reach it.

Sun Wukong was taken away by the guards, he pushed them away when they tried to touch him, and followed them with a whipping tail. He saw, from the corners of his eyes, Mui guide the group in another direction. 

The guards guided him to a huge wardrobe, filled to the brim with clothes. They bowed before the lavishly clothed demon swan pacing in the room, the man seemingly high ranked here. 

“The lord asked us to properly clothe this man. He is to be the lord's sworn brother.” Informed the guards. 

“Sworn brother? I see… this could work for the will as well.” Muttered the swan as he let his gaze swept over the sage. “He definitely needs a change of clothes. Our Cheng is picky with appearances. Thanks for guiding him here, you can resume your duties.” The guards bowed and left the room, leaving the sage alone with the demon swan. “You are the Monkey King, aren't you?”

“I am.” Replied the King, daring the other demon to do something with his tone. 

“I am Bolin, our lord's tailor. They call you the Handsome Monkey King, let's see if we can bring that out.” The sage gasped, greatly offended, but he didn't have time to complain, Bolin was already pushing him in an adjoining room, one filled with baths. “Girls!” Immediately a flock of four swan younglings rushed towards them, each dressed in white, elegant gowns. “This is Sun Wukong, the Monkey King. He is to be our lord sworn brother, so let's make him shine like a diamond!”

“Yes, father!” Replied the swan younglings, each with utmost seriousness. 

“Monkey King, sir, what type of fur do you have?” Asked one of the younglings as she intently eyed his sun colored fur, she was a bit skinnier than the others. 

“Short type? I don't have a thick underfur.” Mumbled the sage, a bit caught off guard by their seriousness. 

“I think monkeys are more used to grooming. Can a bath damage your fur?” Asked another, a bit shorter than her sisters. 

“Grooming is for the twigs and bugs. I can take a bath.”

“Perfect !” 

They ushered him to one of the steaming baths, one with lukewarm water according to Bolin (to not damage his fur, they said). Fortunately, they gave him the privacy to change behind a folding screen. He awkwardly removed his clothing and hid his manhood with a white towel he tied on his hips. When he stepped out of the folding screen, they waved him over and made him sit before the bath. They groomed him with a soft brush, untangling all of his knots while Bolin was looking over products and asking some questions about his coat. When his fur was well-groomed (from the tip of his tail to the edge of his toes, they always asked if he was comfortable with touch before grooming a particular area, something the King appreciated), he lowered himself in the bath. 

They added some good-scented products in it, and perhaps some oil that made his coat shinier. The younglings massaged him while he was bathing, delicately treating each of his strands of fur as if it were a treasure in itself. He learned their names while they treated him. The one massaging his shoulders, and doing a wonderful job at it, was Bo, she was seemingly stronger than any of her sisters, and on the brasher side. The skinnier one was named Hua, she was the most knowledgeable when it came to fur care, she did most of the grooming earlier. The shorter one was named Ping, she was the most leveled of the flock, and the most respectful, always asking for his boundaries and reminding her sisters to ask as well. The last one, the rounder one, was named Shu, she was quieter than any of them, and from what he gathered she was the most skilled when it came to make-up. She did ask him what colors he liked, and what he was comfortable with, which he appreciated. 

Once washed and oiled, they dried him with fluffy towels, asking now and then if everything was alright. He was then sitted in a comfortable chair, before a silver mirror. They sharpened his claws, whitened his fangs, oiled his lips and delicately cut his fur to make it even. His eyebrows were brushed and straightened, and the heart-shaped patch of fur on his chest more defined. Once they stepped back, he blinked at his reflection. The glamors he applied on a daily basis were certainly at play, but he looked good. His fur had never been shinier and softer, it looked like the sun itself blessed him. Sun Wukong admired the man in the mirror for a bit, before following Bolin out of the bathroom. 

The swan talked with one of her daughters, Ping, to know what sort of colors would suit him better while the others asked what he was comfortable with, according to them one could only truly shine when they liked what they were wearing. They settled on a peach colored hanfu embroidered with lotus flowers, one he found particularly pretty, with a red slashes. After they dressed him, Shu took care of his make-up while Bo picked jewelry to adorn him. 

Once he was ready, he looked at the man in the mirror and had to restrain his purr. Those swans certainly knew how to dress someone, he almost felt like some sort of deity blessed with heavenly beauty. 

“You look good, Monkey King, sir.” Praised Ping as she softly adjusted his slashes. 

“As expected of the Handsome Monkey King.” Chuckled Bo as she puffed out her chest. 

“You all did a good job.” Muttered the King with reddening cheeks. 

“Alright, girls. I will escort the Monkey King to our lord, clean the room.” Cut Bolin, the swan younglings all sung “Yes, father!” before disappearing in the bathroom. 

Sun Wukong followed Bolin out of the room, they walked in a peaceful silence towards the dining room (when Bolin asked a passing guard, they told him the group was there), their steps echoing in the corridors. The servants that passed by them always made an effort to bow at Bolin, Sun Wukong could see the deep settled respect in their eyes when the swan returned their greeting with a short nod. 

“Are you really just a tailor?” Asked the sage after a bit, his curiosity getting the better of him. 

“I am. Our lord value apparences a lot.”

“He's vain.” Grumbled the sage, his anger sparking anew at the mention of the lord. Bolin looked at him with a raised eyebrow, before letting out a soft chuckle. 

“I know our lord can seem…particular. But he's not bad.”

“I have trouble believing that! He was ready to force someone to marry him.”

“Hm, for the will.” Mumbled the swan. 

“If he wants the throne so badly, he can take it for all I care, but he can't involve others in this.” Huffed the King. 

“... The marriage would have been temporary.” Explained the swan, his tone a little harsher than before.

“Still.” Bolin stopped walking, he turned towards the sage, a storm brewing in his eyes. 

“I know Cheng doesn't seem like the most caring, and mayhaps he offended you in some way. But I will ask you to not talk about our lord in this manner. He is to be your sworn brother, you will see then what kind of person he is.”

“Yeah, I'll see.” Replied the King, tone a little bit softer. He didn't want to offend Bolin, but the feeling brewing inside of him, the ugly beast called jealousy, pushed him to be spiteful towards Cheng. The sage wasn't used to this feeling, thus he had troubles to reign it. 

The rest of the walk was more tense, both decided that silence was better if they didn't want to argue. The dining room was filled with watering smells, all kinds of plates and food, some the sage never even knew existed. The whole group was eating leisurely around a lavish mahogany table, they all turned towards him when he arrived. Bolin bowed to Mui, who was at Macaque's side, and left the room with elegance. 

“Wow, you look good Mister King!” Chuckled the dragon girl. 

“Thanks. I feel good.” The sage turned towards the warrior, who was gaping at him with a flaming face, eyes wide, hands frozen before his plate of mangoes. Sun Wukong felt a pleasant tingle skim above his kin, he walked, deliberately slowly, towards the macaque and sat on the unoccupied chair on his right. He relished in the way Macaque's eyes roamed over him, stuttering for a moment on his hips. “You have something to say, Mac?” Asked the King. 

“What? I, hm, I-I, what ?” Stammered the warrior, his tail trashing the chair's legs. The kids were choking on their own laughter, while the adults were either rolling their eyes or smirking openly. 

“You lost your tongue?” Purred the sage as he leaned over the other, Macaque almost fell out of his chair, his hands tightly gripping the table. Sun Wukong wanted to keep teasing him, but he had to stop once the peacock arrived. 

Cheng was dressed in red, the cloth flowing around his figure like a river of blood, striking against his jade feathers. He had an ebony cane in his right hand, something he used with ease to navigate. He sat in the tallest chair, the one made of pure gold.

“I hope everything was alright for you. I will accommodate you to the best of my ability until the end of the festival.” Started the peacock. “Now, I cannot see you, Monkey King, but I trust Bolin did a wonderful job.” Cackled the lord, Sun Wukong wanted to retort, but unfortunately Bolin did, in fact, a good job. “Concerning this deal of ours, I want it to be clear. Sun Wukong is to aid me as my sworn brother during the dawning festival, of course he will try his best to win, but even in case of defeat, I will give you in exchange the lantern piece you desire.” The sage was quite surprised by the terms, particularly because he wasn't even obliged to win the festival, it almost felt like a trap. “Of course, I will not give you the lanterne piece if I feel that the Monkey King is insincere, and does not do his best to give me victory.”

“... I accept the terms.” Sighed Sun Wukong, he groaned when he caught sight of the blooming smirk on the peacock's lips. 

“Wonderful! Now, for this oath of ours… Normally I believe sworn brotherhood is only made with a promise, but we will need a formal oath that binds us.” The lord sat up and walked towards the sage, his hand tracing the edges of the table to guide himself. Sun Wukong raised himself once Cheng stopped before him, they stood in a tense silence for a second, thoughtful, and then the lord offered his hand. The sage grimaced, and reluctantly took the bird's hand. “I, the Stone-eyed Peacock, Cheng, will take Sun Wukong, the Handsome Monkey King, Great Sage Equal to Heaven, as my brother. As long as he wishes, I will treat him as my blood and flesh, as my friend. I swore on my name and my honor, that I will see in him my own.”

An oath, for demons, was a matter of honor. It was one of the ultimate promises, made with witnesses. Losing honor was a fate no demons wanted, it was worse than death itself. 

“I, the Intelligent Stone Monkey, Sun Wukong, will take Cheng, the Stone-eyed Peacock, as my brother. Until we both gain what we want, I will honor him as my friend. I swore on my name and honor, that I will see in him my brother.” They shook hands before the eyes of Cheng's servants and Sun Wukong's friends, sealing their promises. In the end, an oath was nothing but words, what mattered was what those words meant for the two parties involved. 

“Well, now that this is sealed. If you ever need something, Mui, there, will serve you.” The parrot demon nodded to them, her colorful feathers shaking with her nod. “The festival starts in one week, we do not know the kind of trials that await us. I will not force you to do anything, brother (Wukong cringed at the word) as I know your abilities. But it will be better for us if you follow me to the library. I want you to know what kind of opponent you will go against.” The sage was ready to refuse, not wanting to go anywhere with the other, but Macaque cut him before he could even open his lips. 

“Mui told me you had a lot of books regarding shadows in this library of yours.” Cheng turned towards the macaque (or at least his general direction) and his smile widened, Sun Wukong did not like this look. 

“Yes! I do! Shadows are fascinating. You can accompany me, and Sun Wukong if he accepts to follow, to the library ! I'm quite curious about you, after all.” Macaque rose from his seat, perhaps ready to follow the peacock, but Sun Wukong immediately went in-between them, tail lashing. 

“Let's go to this damn library.” Grumbled the sage, Macaque looked at him with a raised eyebrow, while Cheng tried to hide his chuckle in the crook of his claws. They nodded towards the other (Cheng took back his cane) and they walked away, the sage made a point of walking in-between the two, allowing absolutely no contact. 

“Jealousy does not suit you, brother.” Snorted the peacock. 

“I think you better shut your mouth right now if you value yourself, brother.” Spat the King, a growl echoing in his tone. 

“Can't you both be civil? We're gonna be here for more than a week.” Sighed his moon as he rubbed his forehead. 

“I'll try, but he's really fun to tease, dearest.” Snickered Cheng. 

“Do not call him like that!”

“See, he's fun.” Cackled the peacock, Sun Wukong wanted to bite his head off for daring laughing at him, for daring even breathing in his direction.

“This is gonna be a hellish week.” Grumbled the warrior, and Sun Wukong couldn't agree more. 

Ch1 / Previous / Next

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.169 Caught up

It's 5:19 a.m., and Desi is giggling, so I guess it's time to get up. Today is her birthday, and I am stoked about celebrating a new chapter of her life. But that joy in tandem with all these deaths, and watching everyone around me get older, has me feeling anxious. In the grand scheme of things, I'm still pretty young, not even a quarter of the way through my adult days. But time feels like it's zooming by. I can't recall exactly when it started, but these last few months have flown by so quickly. It feels like just yesterday I moved in with Sophia, and now I'm grieving the loss of my parents. And I have a toddler now. Where has the time gone? What have I really done with my life? Even though I know I've grown a lot, sometimes I still feel like that scared young man who was afraid of his feelings.

Desiree isn't ready to eat yet, but I'm starving, so I put her in the high chair while I got food for me. I learned my lesson, and she will not scare me like that again. I think she enjoys keeping me company, sitting there, blowing raspberries and saying things to me. She's so chatty so early in the morning. Maybe she's recalling a wild dream she had, heh. I'll always encourage growing her skills, but hopefully she won't end up as chatty as Chi Chi and her daughter. Still, I kinda can't wait to have a real conversation with her. I tell her today is her birthday and about how she'll be a big girl and all the fun things we can do together like go to the park, play in the water, and make friends. She doesn't seem impressed, and I laughed at her unamused face. I guess she's not interested in life outside my arms yet, heh.

Sophia joined us a little later, and I ask for her thoughts about doing play dates with Yasmine's girls. I expected a little resistance, but I didn't expect the full on stone face.

"We made a promise to each other, Luca."

I had not forgotten how we promised to make time for each other no matter how hard or busy things got, but what did that have to do with this? Desi needs to socialize. We may as well do it with kids we already know vs. meeting strangers at the park or whatever. Sophia admits the recent busyness was beyond our control and expresses gratefulness for the pockets of time we made for ourselves. But she also senses me getting caught up. I shift in my chair and tense up because it sounds like she's accusing me of something, and I don't like it.

"You have a huge heart, and I love that about you," she says. "I don't ever want you to stop caring about people, but while you're out here trying to help everyone, I feel like you're gonna edge me out of your life."

I can't lie. Those felt like fighting words, and I couldn't keep it together anymore.

"Edge you out? How could you possibly think that? After all we've been through??"

"No, please, you misunderstood me. I'm just saying I don't want to be left out. You're already gone a lot to look after your niece and nephews. I'm not a babysitter or even your baby mama. I'm you're wife! And we're friends! I miss talking to you and laughing about stupid stuff!"

"I'm not saying I don't want to help Yasmine," she continued. "Just...watch yourself. You're so quick to say yes to everyone, but I don't want you spending all of our time being a hero. Remember to make time for us. Please."

I see what she means now. I guess I have been falling down on the job lately. Taking care of her, Desiree, and the house is noble—endearing, even—but it's no substitute for spending quality time together, not that my goal was to avoid quality time. She shouldn't have to loiter in the living room, waiting for me to come home to spend time with me. I need to be more intentional about it. I still haven't taken her to that restaurant by Dub's house. Maybe it's time to clear the proverbial schedule and do that.

"I'll remember."

[yellowhollyhock]

Watching tmnt 2007 today and realizing how much Michelangelo is quietly very much on Raph's side, and I don't think anyone notices except maybe Donnie

I mean when he comes home and it's all empty his reaction ("well, this place used to be fun") kind of reminds me a lot of Raph saying things like "crime never took a break, you did." The frustration with being expected to just sit and wait for Leo to get back. And of course it's pretty much spelled out when he sees the Nightwatcher on the news and wishes it were him out there. This leads to an argument between Raph and Donnie which Mikey doesn't participate in, but in the first place it's all based on Mikey wanting to be doing what the Nightwatcher is doing (or maybe wanting to be anywhere besides at home where the silence won't let him forget who's missing).

Before the whole rooftop red and blue showdown it's also Mikey who's the most vocally resistant to Leo 'getting this team back into shape.' He plays it as a joke, but still he is the one who protests.

When Leo says 'Nightwatchman' Mikey is at least as and I think sounds more defensive than Raph in correcting him about the name

And I think the intent is that we're to read that as Mikey being a big fan of the Nightwatcher, almost treating him like a comic book character, but it hits harder if you assume (as I prefer to) that they all knew it was Raph and just weren't saying anything because he was clearly trying to keep it a secret

Mikey is also watching from the doorway while Raph and Splinter talk after Leo gets kidnapped

Even the end where he wants to hang up his Cowabunga Carl head along with Raph's Nightwatcher helmet. A humorous moment but one which emphasizes how much Mikey has been shadowing Raph all this time.

It just makes me think about his secret hopes and frustrations. Him and Donnie have been leaning on each other, but also in the movie Donnie is very... not exactly parental, but. hm. Overbearing? Mikey makes a pun and he's like "remember our talk?" Mikey's watching TV and he's over his shoulder like "why do you do this to yourself?" I just think a lot about Donnie fussing and doting with Mikey, probably a little afraid of losing him too, and Mikey feeling like Donnie thinks he's childish and incompetent.

And of course with Leo. Mikey is so excited to see him it's heartbreaking. He hugs him so tight Leo literally can't get his arms free to hug back. Mikey's expression is almost the same as Splinter's when they hear that Leo's been taken. And he's the one saying "what are we gonna do now?" 1) scared of Leo being gone again and the way have been for the past year becoming permanent 2) looking to Raph for leadership after overhearing his conversation with Splinter

I just think it's interesting that Mikey really doesn't seem mad at Raph. Leo immediately assumes that Raph is causing trouble when April is telling him how thinga are without him. Donnie definitely seems bitter about Raph's judgment towards them for doing nothing (which is fair). Mikey, we really don't see that. I imagine he's hurt about Raph not being around, but at the same time from Mikey's pov no one has been around

and at least he can see Raph on tv if they can't hang out in person

None of that to say that Mikey and Donnie aren't getting along or aren't close. But because of what the movie focused on, I guess I'm thinking sometimes I assume that Mikey is having similar frustrations as Don and they're on the same page. But that doesn't really seem to be the case.

Also him like shadowing Raph is interesting thinking about Foot Mikey later on. Like, maybe he feels like he's doing the same as Raph did or even learning from Raph's mistakes by finding himself a team to be part of so he can do something good instead of sitting around waiting for his brothers to tell him what to do. Especially since Karai and the Foot work with the turtles at the end of the movie when she chooses to honor their agreement with Winters. And there's also kind of a theme of not knowing who the good guys or bad guys are; like Mikey could be thinking 'Leo and Don thought the Nightwatcher was bad, maybe we're wrong about the Foot too'