#i guess some people do that but i think its a bit too uncanny

[lokh]

@deviljhomaycry @kiexen dordle

[mancer-in-the-abbey]

This coding course is kicking my ass, have some general ghoul headcanons, one for each of them

Phantom/Aeon: New Bug, as ever, strikes me as a “fake it till you make it” kind of guy. As such, it kinda makes me feel like he’d be a theater kid if given the chance, and although I think he’d get a kick out of musicals (Phantom of the Opera, ha ha), I think specifically he’d be into improv. Like, there is no chance his comfort show ISN’T Whose Line Is It Anyway. The minute someone introduced him to D&D, it’s over for everyone.

Aurora: I think she has a soft spot for classic opera pieces. It really lets her go all out in a technical sense, use her range to its fullest extent. It’s stereotypical, but her favorite aria is the Queen of the Night. It’s so damn fun to do this quick jumps in scale in such quick succession!

Sunshine: MASSIVE sweet tooth. Like, yes she knows her corporeal form is fragile and she needs to take care of it, and she does to some extent! She keeps very fit! But fuck if she doesn’t just devour a pound cake if she’s given the opportunity. Will absolutely get a hell of a stomach ache after, but in her mind it’s worth it. Hey, at least she takes good care of her teeth to match!

Rain: A fan of Dancing With The Stars! Though he himself is not known to be all that steady on his feet, he loves watching people who aren’t traditionally considered athletic be put into a professional dance setting and either crash and burn or get better over time. He honestly doesn’t care about the celebrity aspect in the least, barely pays attention to the slice-of-life interviews before the dances themselves, but MAN does he love to pick apart someone’s performance and try to guess what the judges will give before the scores are announced.

Cumulus: Wasn’t initially a gamer, she more preferred to watch those who were have fun in the ghoul common room, but she didn’t have much else to do during the pandemic so… yeah, she just CONSUMED everything Rain sent her way. Animal Crossing, Stardew Valley, Portal and Portal 2x Hades, the entire Resident Evil franchise up to that point, even DOOM Eternal funny enough. She’s kept up with since then, but still has massive fondness for Animal Crossing.

Cirrus: Loves gem stones and precious metals! She has a real crow instinct but is kinda picky about it, like she’ll get fixated on a shiny gold hair clip with rinestones on it but if it feels too cheep in her hands she’ll lose interest entirely. Even still, her jewelry collection is LARGE. One expensive magpie, that woman, but she shares with the other ghouls if they ask so it evens out.

Swiss: It doesn’t fully mesh with go-to interpretation of him but I once read a headcanon that posited Swiss being able to replicate sounds to an uncanny degree and I am bringing it back here because I love it so damn much, kinda plays into being a little bit of every ghoul. I like to think if you startle Swiss he’ll forget to use his normal voice and just goes straight to the sound effects board. Phantom accidentally pops in from nowhere? Sudden air horn blast. Dew tackling him to the ground? The sound of a car going past you. Mountain stepping on his tail? Fire alarm. Someone kicks him in the balls? Microphone feedback. For a while.

Mountain: He likes eating rocks and precious metals. It’s already a thing with some subsets of earth ghoul, but like for Mountain it’s at a higher level. His preferred snack is those semi-precious rocks you get at tourist attractions, he will just chow down on it like popcorn. When that’s not available, however, he uses salt to sate the the itch. Dude keeps a salt lamp in his room that he uses as a salt lick when no one’s looking. This also extends to novelty items MADE of salt. Those Himalayan salt shot glasses? One-use only. Go straight into his mouth.

Aether: One of those tricks Omega showed him during era 3 is how to use your own quintessence on yourself, something generally considered to be very hard to do amongst quint ghouls. Aether has tweaked and expanded on this ability and has learned how to… basically hotbox but with quintosis. Not something he does often cause it’s draining but sometimes it’s nice to unwind on a near molecular level. Among the few he shares this ability with are Dew, Mountain, and Swiss. He’ll teach the new bug when he feels he’s ready for that kind of power…

Dewdrop: is actually a really good cook! Like really good, actually. He got really into watching Food Network when he first came to Earth which evolved into watching older cooking shows. This further evolved into experimenting with his own recipes. He’s also taught Mountain everything he knows about how to handle the kitchen, so they tend to share cooking duty between the two of them. No one’s complained yet!

[adobe-outdesign]

could you review some of the neopets as animals outfits, like the fennec kacheek, red panda vandagyre, and cockatiel pteri? (those are examples, choose whichever you like!) thank you <3

(Note: I included a random selection of outfits in this post, but feel free to send in asks if anyone wants to see a specific outfit I didn't cover.)

I'll be honest, I'm personally not super big on the "outfit that resembles a real-world animal" trend. First, I play Neopets for the cool fantasy creatures; even the most true-to-life Neopets species have some pretty fantastical colors. I feel like making pets just look exactly like actual animals kind of defeats the purpose of them being Neopets. I get why people would like it and I'm not saying it's bad; it's just not my thing.

Also, the other reason I'm not always big on these outfits is that a lot of Neopets have colours that already resemble real animal patterns. Not only do the outfits blur the colour/customization line quite a bit, but usually I like the colour ones much more, as they keep the actual design of the Neopets in place and just change the patterns and colors, rather than covering up the fun fantasy elements. This also helps them avoid the uncanny valley effect, which I talk about more below.

Also I might be over thinking this but who is making these outfits. None of these animals seem to exist in-universe as far as we're aware. what are the shopkeepers basing these off of. the colours at least have a magic as an excuse

Examples that I think are okay:

Feathery Pteri Outfit: This one's nice! I like the layered patterning on the wings and the high-contrast colors. Most, though, I like that this sticks fairly close to the actual pet, mostly just changing up the tail shape. This almost could've been a paintbrush colour, but then again what colour is up in the air.

(Side note: the eye clipping over the beak is a rendering issue? I think?)

Bouncing Zafara: This one definitely strays farther from the actual pet than the Pteri, but it's a fitting animal choice and it doesn't fall into the uncanny valley, which is all I care about. The body is still somewhat recognizable as a Zafara in terms of shape, and the Miamouse as the joey is super cute.

Freshwater Lenny: Kind of the same case as the Zafara; not super one-to-one with the actual pet, but it's still recognizable as a Lenny and isn't too uncanny. The legs are a particularly nice touch, actually changing the pose to look more heron-like (though they are also the part that strays dangerously into being too detailed).

Please don't:

Adorable Kacheek: Sorry to the fans of this one, but this outfit just resides deep within the uncanny valley to me—like it's a mascot suit instead of just a normal pet. The artstyle is way off from Neopets, looking much more Subeta-ish (except Subeta's art usually isn't so off putting). It's not a bad artstyle, mind you, it's just not very Neopets-ish. I also feel like a fennec fox was also a bad pick for this one, as it's basically unrecognizable as a Kacheek at all.

Feathered Eyrie: Speaking of the uncanny valley, this is another pet that lands squarely there due to having entirely too much detail in the shading and weirdly realistic fur textures. It also just doesn't look very good aesthetically—the beak doesn't fit the face, and the wings are an absolute trainwreck (not only is the perspective wrong, but the left wing is coming from the middle of its back!). On the plus side, you'd be hard pressed to not recognize this as an Eyrie, and it's a fantasy creature instead of a regular animal, so I guess that's something?

Furry Meerca: Hmm... no. This one also suffers from an overly-detailed artstyle and way too much realism, which is especially jarring when placed on top of the Meerca's heavily stylized body shape, resulting in a perfectly round animal with hyper-realistic animal eyes. It's also particularly bothersome because we already had a chipmunk Meerca design in the form of the striped Meerca colour, which is just this but less soul-haunting:

Which is what I meant at the beginning when I was talking about colours vs outfits. The colour is a Meerca that looks like a chipmunk; the outfit is a chipmunk that looks like a Meerca. Big difference.

[rambunctioustoons]

movie night! [+ ao3 link]

monty/reader , word count 1,300

The one where Monty watches a horror movie with you. ... Gators like horror movies, right?

The gentle thrum of the cheap projector is occasionally cut by even scratchier audio quality. An impulsive purchase from the local thrift store, and quickly attached to it in all its mediocre glory. 

Sneaking personal items into the 'Plex hadn't ever been much trouble, but sneaking yourself in here after hours tended to be. 

Overtime unwelcomed, but as if you weren't excitable to the prospect of cheap Fazco candy and hanging with a pal. 

Couldn't convince him to wear a costume though. Scowling briefly to the suggestion. 

Casting still dawned with neon vibrant hues, some crackles in the white skeleton adjacent paint along his arms. 

For someone who seemed so adverse on gimmicky holidays, Monty sure seemed to enjoy it. Leaning more toward the trick part of trick or treat. Unsure if it's a good or sorrowful thing he can't be out roaming the midnight streets terrorizing people. 

Though, given the option, it's difficult to believe he would anyway. Who knows! 

A offhand remark on he's as scary to you as the girl from the Exorcist, only taking some back and forth before pinning his frustrations on why you're calling him weak and feeble. 

"You haven't see it, have you?" 

"Tck. If it ain't made by Fazco, then no." 

Covering the irritated flick of his tail with a sharp pathway around you. Directly into some old freaky storage room. 

Not much needed to add heart palpitating ambience, you'd both need it to stay conscious through all the dreary talking bits. 

The visual effects for the time were endearingly unsettling, but you just never could take ghoulish possession stories all that seriously. The spooks lingered around every dark ridden corridor of the 'Plex had ruined the fun quite some time ago.

The appetite for indulgent horror had for sure dwindled when you lived through it. 

Tossing popcorn in your mouth from the pile you've collected in your hand. Noting each and every time you reach for more, Monty's gripping the fabric of the sofa tighter, and tighter. 

The final time you claw your hand for another handful of buttery popcorn, his sprawled out claws had begun to splinter the fabric of the sofa. 

... He's so bored, he's going to shred the thing before the movie finishes. Shame too, guess he's even programmed to revolt entertainment not surrounding the 'Plex. 

Eventually, wide red eyes flicker to your peeping direction. Unrelenting on the staring, you just continue eating popcorn.

"Sorry dude, didn't think it sucked this bad." You say, watching his posture relax some. Claws still indented in the sofa though. 

"I'll turn it off." Immediately beginning to search for your phone. 

"... What? Think I can't handle watching some cheap ol' movie?" He scowls. Flopping back to slump against the sofa. "Seen worse. Heard worse."

"Have you now." You quip. “Prove it.” 

One hand reaching into the popcorn bucket, crumbling some of the pieces as he tosses them directly at your face. 

Opening your mouth as some of them do made it in. Most of them just hit the bridge of your nose though. 

Too busy laughing as your lamely impressive skills draw his attention, attempting to toss more into your mouth. He can hit cheap point shots and arcade high scores with uncanny ease. 

Entirely purposeful the way he just carelessly flicks a few pieces at once in random directions to watch the struggle. Stubbornly trying to contort the best you can. 

It's not until he slices a pack of sour gummy worms open that you protest his nonsense. "Do not! I'll literally eat those off the floor if they fall and get sick." 

"Psh," He huffs, nudging your upper arm. "Even just one would make ya hurl? Floors ain't that bad."

"I'll get sick and die dead and it'll be all your fault." You insist, stupidly warmed to your dramatics cracking through that demeanour of his.

But Monty drops the one in hand anyway, drops one right on the floor with a full blown shutter. Like a monster trailed it's cold incorporeal fingertips up and up his spine. Expression blown wide to match. 

Sometimes. Your friends did things you didn't understand, evasive to things that were mostly normal. Monty didn't like closed spaces. He did not like the bowling alley

Dude, is the word that almost ghosts past your lips. The one that dances to be said on the very tip of your tongue. 

The grainy output of the projector catches your attention first. You'd recognize the scene anywhere, you recognize the frame. 

It had been a jump scare. Cheap and tactical for the time period. One that never settled that eerie uncomfortable dread in your chest the way it was supposed to. 

Wide eyed gaze darting back to the Gator.

And he's stressed. He's so freaked out the entirety of his claws are out. 

And you. Are a raging asshole. 

"Wanna turn it off? Kinda boring." You shrug, not bothering to hide the sheer amusement a horror movie from the 70's is what's got him so damn rattled.

" No ." He scowls, whipping his frame so roughly back to face the screen it shakes the sofa, knocks a couple popcorn kernels out of the bowl. "Scared? Thought ya said this was boring. Why you wanna turn it off so bad, punk." 

Swatting a hand over to give you a little shove. Doing in back wouldn't do much good, besides. He'd have to push you so much harder to wipe the triumphant grin from your face. 

Montgomery Gator is scared of at least one beloved horror film. 

You'll keep such a secret tucked tenderly to your chest, much to his gruff and tuff dismay. 

"Maybe." Turning back to the movie yourself, a small smarmy hum following. "Maybe it is a little scary."

Silently shifting the snacks barricading the two of you off to the side. Wordless offer of solace should he want it. Pretending he'd just been drumming his fingertips atop the armrest instead of shredding it. 

It had been awhile since you'd watched the movie in full, much less never tucked away inside a closet decorated with cobwebs. Finding yourself shifting closer.

Discovering you really hadn't needed to shuffle all that far. Your legs tucked up on the surface bumping against his thigh. 

The next scare that you'd already known was coming, still has you jumping alongside Monty. Despite his stature, manages to curl himself around you, practically eased into your lap.

It's so ridiculous you try and fail to stifle your laughter, winding your arms around his shoulder. He hunches further down to evade your gaze. 

"Shut up, shut up. Only watchin' this 'cause you wanted to so damn bad! I ain't scared!" He grumbles, wobbly and dishevelled. 

Apologizing in strings of words to cushion the sting of giggling yourself stupid. You'd seen Moon crawl down all tangled from ceiling beams, and it had been the visual of a human person that freaked him out so bad. 

Strange. 

Giving his upper arm a squeeze, very well knowing the ticking time bomb of well deserved frustration would keep stirring in your lap, until you'd inevitably end up shoved face first on the ground. 

"... You really aren't scared'a that?" He huffs. Resting his head oh so subtly on your shoulder. A little awkward, but you'd take it. "Somethin' wrong with you. More than the usual." 

"Oh something is. Something is for sure." You muse. Leaning further back against the sofa.  "We can turn it off now, if you want. Doesn't get much better than this." 

"Maybe." He relents. "Depends. What else happens? Everyone else get possessed by demons too?" 

"Naah. That'd be a pretty good twist though. Demon infects everyone else, couldn't even imagine how terrible that'd be." 

"... Yeah." Monty parts your frame with a pat to your thigh. Kneeling up to turn the projector off himself. "Terrible." 

The lens flickers off with a faint click. 

[cult-of-the-eye]

MAG 87 let's goooo

I've heard of the uncanny valley before I think from a Tumblr post actually isn't it like non-humans that look like humans but slightly off that creep us out??

Sounds cool tho

GEORGIE!!!! JON!!!!

God I love her she actually tries to knock some sense into Jon

Jon's hesitation at accepting help is frustrating when he's just claimed that he's ready to accept that he needs allies but I guess it's understandable when he doesn't want to bring someone who doesn't have a place in this all into the situation

But also I guess he can't really help bringing her in, cause he's staying at her house, she's probably already in to a certain degree

This is already so long so I'm putting a read more

She knows that she's a last resort, she seems like a genuinely kind person, she's completely understood that the man is desperate but she's also willing to draw a line wow shes so cool

"you're a good person" augh god that must've been difficult for him to hear

"whatever this is, it's messing you up"

Georgie's right about everything all the time that's the conclusion I'm coming to from this

I like how she says you can choose to leave it alone, i think it might've been the first time it had crossed Jon's mind since it all started that maybe he had a choice in this, but the tragedy is that it's been said too late, if he did ever have choice, then it's definitely gone by now. And Jon is very much aware of that.

GERTRUDE????

Sebastian skinner THE NAME

Getrude seems very like practical about the way she does things, case number first, name, where it occurred and dates, like she doesn't do any of Jon's "head archivist of the Magnus Institute, London" stuff I guess cause he was doing it to sound important and she doesn't need that, she knows exactly what she's doing and what the situation is so she can just get straight to the point with it

I love analysing everyone's different little intro bit I think it's so cool how their personalities and beliefs form part of it

This statement actually like shook me, I don't know why but lately the statements have been sort of getting to me. I don't think they've gotten scarier though, I think my frame of mind has just changed recently

Just weirdo little valley with weirdo little people doing fucking blood rituals

It was very classic horror movie

I googled flensing on incognito mode cause I wasn't sure what would come up lol

Yeah that ending was horrifying I hate the idea of the only thing being left is the mannequin

That's so funny Gertrude was like fuck this guy's name in particular

So orsinov is like the avatar of the stranger

And they're skinning people for some sort of ritual called the Unknowing

Of course Gertrude is the kind of woman to use the word ilk in every day language

Wait fuck this was in 2015 and the current statements are set in what? 2016/7? The Unknowing has to be close then oh god

Oh god she got attacked??? By what???

Who the fuck is Jude perry

Do I know her???

Oh god poor Mr skinner

FUCK FUCK FUCK ITS CALLIOPE MUSIC FUCK OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

Oh god Georgie is really in it now if she can hear it

He sounds so scared jesus christ

I appreciate Georgie trying to get the stuff out of her house but girl I don't think that's gonna stop it from being there

Oh god he's trying so hard to keep it from Georgie but now he's realised that he actually can't

He has put her in danger and that's the fact of it

"I'm not sure I can."

AUGH

HE HAS NO CHOICE IN IT. HE KNOWS. HIS PATH HAS BEEN SOLIDIFIED. DNBSHSJSKWKSMSMKSSJJDJ

[bluedalahorse]

musings before I go to the market

Thinking this morning about how of the YR character studies I’ve written by myself, I have one centered on Sara, one about August, one about Simon, and one about Felice.

I’m about to talk about kudos, which can feel kinda gauche, but I mostly want to bring them up from the angle of something that contradicted my expectations a bit.

So it turns out that:

the August-centered fic (published in June 2024) has the most kudos at 32

Sara’s fic (published in September 2021) comes next at 29

Felice (published in August of 2024) is next at 25

and Simon (from July 2024) comes in last at 21

I don’t want to draw too many conclusions about this, because it’s a very small sample size. But it’s interesting.

What really contradicted my expectations is that the August fic has the most kudos. Moreover, it’s a fic that takes a pretty optimistic view of August’s future and portrays him as a relatively decent guy who’s trying to do the right thing. I think some of this might be timing-related—it was written close enough to the aftermath of season 3 that the post-completion fandom surge hadn’t quite died down yet, and while August had his vocal detractors I also think there were a lot more fans in the fandom last spring who gave him grace and wanted him to grow. I do sometimes wonder if that undercurrent in fandom still exists, very quietly, and that anti-August sentiment is perceived as “universal” in YR fandom because it’s what select people are most vocal about. Are people more hopeful toward/interested in/just plain curious about August than they let on? Sometimes I want to believe that, but I also don’t want to be naive.

Sara’s fic having 29 kudos seems to be in part due to its longevity. It’s been around forever, which I think is what allowed people to find it and read it. It’s my first fic, but not my best fic. There’s some cultural error weirdness and some side characters who aren’t used well. Other than that, it’s written in a pretty polarizing format—verse and second person. But it’s a fun little Good For Her story about revenge! I also think this speaks to the bigger size of the fandom in the early days, and the fact that there was more interest in non-Wilmon characters.

I think of all the fics I posted to AO3, the Felice one is the one that got the most reblogs when I announced it on tumblr. It also brought in readers outside of my usual circle. I attempted a more traditional fanfic form here, and had fun playing with it. In some ways, I think of it as the fic where I was most itching to make a statement, because I just had A Lot Of Feelings about the part where fandom (myself included) often praises Felice for being a selfless and generous friend. I wanted to poke at that notion a bit. I wonder what kind of reception it would have gotten if it had been published at the same time as the August fic, like which one would have caught people’s attention more. There is a lot of professed interest in Felice—she won the non-Wilmon favorite character poll, back in the day, after all—but I always wonder how that translates to fan interest in stories centered on her.

The other stat that really surprises me here is Simon coming in dead last for kudos, because he is after all the fandom’s most beloved. I can see there being reasons for this, though. First of all, the fic is written in verse, which is polarizing. It was also published during Simon’s month (I had at first hoped to attach it to a prompt, but then second guessed myself about that) so I was competing with a lot of other Simon fics. It’s maybe the closest thing I’ve written to a traditional wilmon fic, but Simon’s relationships with Sara and Linda are put on equal footing, and also I am just… I have a very particular way of writing romance that may not be everyone’s cup of tea. So I feel like it exists in this uncanny valley between traditional wilmon fic and my usual YR fanfic brand. At the same time, the people who liked it seemed to like it a lot! So there’s that.

Anyway, I’m about to add Vincent to the mix as of tomorrow, in a serialized drabble format with multiple POVs. So it will be interesting to see what kind of engagement he—a much more secondary character—gets compared to main characters.

I feel like I’m wearing a little lab coat and goggles and such. Let’s do fandom science!

[ferdieinceladoncity]

WILD BLUE YONDER SPOILERS/THOUGHTS

Doing this again :3

.Now this was a Doctor Who episode. It was amazing, it was hilarious, it was thrilling, and I am so glad that this episode was kept so tightly under wraps and wasn't part of the leaks- though how would this episode even be explained written down anyway?

.I don't really know why Isaac newton was there? To make the mavity joke and the snippet about the doctors sexuality? both very valid and great moments, but unless some important plot point fell out of my head it was a bit random, but I'm not complaining I suppose

.my mum was CONVINCED that it wasn't coffee that donna was drinking, with the way they were acting at the start of the episode. lmao.

.This set is giving crazy high budget. The entire episode was very visually impressive. The scene of the entire outside of the ship spinning in space (and the weird contorted circle shape of it) makes you blink twice

.I liked the bit that confirmed the doctors attraction to men, its funny that he seemed surprised about it. "is that who I am now?" who you are NOW? Anyway, I really hope it's explicitly talked about in future episodes that the doctor is bisexual, omnisexual or however it happens to be. I would like the attraction to ALL genders (or lack thereof) to be made explicit.

.My heart actually dropping out of tension hasn't been something I've felt in a doctor who episode in a LONG time, but that scene where we cut to the Doctor messing with the tubes in the blue room after we just see Donna and the Doctor in the orange one actually gave me that perfect sinking feeling. It was such a great "somethings not right" moment. Like, oh shit- that's not HIM-

."My arms are too long" and both of them just brushing that off coming from the other initially is very funny. and very real. Some shit I wouldn't blink if my friends said around me. yeah I dont know it's like that

.THEY WENT HAM ON THE VISUAL EFFECTS AND I CAN'T LOVE IT ENOUGH. IT'S UNCANNY, IT'S GOOFY AND IT'S UNSETTLING- I could NOT stop laughing, but it was also horrific! That scene of them chasing them down the hallway was straight up nightmare fuel. how did rtd even decide that was. that was something he wanted to do. he was right but like. crazy.

.The scene where donna and the doctor confront each other and the viewer knows one of each set isn't "right' but we don't know which is which (and I was wrong with my initial guess, which is probably the point) that was great. ""Donna""" telling the doctor that the flux wasn't his fault and him responding "I KNOW" was really just something to me. I cant remember much about the flux storyline, but sometimes things that aren't your fault still hurt so much.

.On the other side of the coin, it was an amazing moment when the """doctor""" realises the tie he threw off is gone, and he says "oh. things that are gone still exist." it's a very chilling line... cooking in the writing room

.Oh. and the spider-walking bit. Top tier. it makes me think of all the people watching doctor who recently just for David Tennant because he's having a Tumblr/twitter dilf sexyman resurgence. Watch your man do this (contorts into a crab walk, runs on all fours) :3 thats how we do things in doctor who. nah im joking he's my celeb crush too

.I also really liked the scene with the line of salt. Had to suspend my disbelief for a second: it's not like he salted across the whole room, walk around it maybe? but it was just a great scene, and the """donna"" dropping to her knees and counting the salt was pretty funny.

.Is this villain and the one in Midnight connected? Gotta be, though I feel as if it might never be explained. The mimicry is too similar of a premise and it makes a lot of sense that they'd reference it given that Midnight is generally considered to be one of the 10th Doctors best episodes.

.Do y'all remember when someone edited the IMDB page to say that Billie Piper was in this episode because whoever did that was quite funny. This episode was leagues better than any returning character call-back episode they could have done (and I say that with so much love for her) but I am one of the many people who want A SINGULAR TENTOO MENTION and the clown music is getting louder and im wondering if I should just go grab my rainbow wig and red nose now

.What kind of animal was the captain? A horse? I guess? I want to see what this alien looked like when it was alive. It made me intrigued and I think it was quite a powerful/scary visual that it wasn't a human skull. There was something more unsettling about an animalistic skull- YES of course it would be an alien yeah duh but do you understand? do you find the visual creepy as well?

.Im sorry but the part where the "doctor" just starts GALLOPING on all fours made me lose it. Me at 11 years old on the school playground pretending to be a wolf. What warrior cat do you think the tenth doctor kins (I dont know, but I do know that 12 kins Jayfeather. That's really obvious.)

.Could he not have thought of ANY better question to ask to determine between the two donnas? And why would "it just is" be the answer he went for? The scene where Donna faces death is powerful: breaking a little of her trust for him: he chose the wrong one. it was good stuff. But hey doctor, please explain your thought process behind that whole scene on this blackboard, because I cant get my head around it.

.My mother wants a ramp that spews people out of the door installed in our house for guests.

.I feel like donna was lying when she said she doesn't remember the doctors 15 years past. Or, idk, well. I wrote that but she did say it was like looking into a furnace, so maybe it's true. Donna asking if the doctor will be alright and the doctor saying "I will be" was great but "when?" "in a million years" was a bit much, but im being pedantic.

.Curious about the salt thing... there's much in the specials that's either being set up for the giggle or the next season, and both are intriguing. FWIW, I think when the Meep was referring to the boss the meep was probably referring to the toymaker, (watch me eat my words next week) but the salt thing- would that really be connected to the toymaker?

.wilf.wilfwilfwilf. Apparently, this is the only time before Bernards death that he features in the specials. This hurts the most, but it hurts SO GOOD that he got to be here one last time. and, fictionally, the doctor got to see Wilf one last time. That's so incredible. I'm tearing up. And I stayed with my eyes glued to the credits scene knowing there would be a dedication to him in the end, and I teared up all over again. Bernard Cribbins acting as Wilf is one of those characters that's going to be remembered forever.

.Incredible. So much fun. This was just... FUN. my whole family really enjoyed this one a lot more than the Star Beast (me and mum loved the star beast, my dad didnt, but he loved this one.)

[no-schedule-crepescule]

I decided to write a short story today!

A Chat At The Beach

By Crepescule

The cold and stony pebbles blend peacefully into the tides as they splash endlessly upwards into white glimmering seafoam; the overcast sky coloring the earth and sea below in various shades of different grays as winds seem to blow a chill into the weathered smooth boulders laid haplessly just out of the lowtide’s reach. Voices of seagulls and distant people echo from within a gentle fog looming over the horizon. There was no other place to be than here.

I pick up a pebble, and to both my dismay and intrigue, a little crab scuttles hurriedly away from its compromised shelter, which promptly gets chucked into the water followed by a satisfying splash and a bit of guilt for crustacean property damage. The water rippled and folded in perfect circles as it slowly spread out and dissipated until it rejoined the trajectory of the waves.

“Hey there,” a voice chimed up from behind me, “be not afraid! Or uh… at least that’s what I think I’m supposed to say”.

Great.

When I turned around, I saw an eerily similar figure staring back at me, a sheepish awkwardness spread across their face in a way I recognize my own to do. I tried to hold a face of disinterest, but the uncanny similarity must’ve leaked a hint of intrigue as the familiar stranger walked on over and sat down beside me.

Great.

“So uh… nice weather today huh?” The stranger said.

The similarities didn’t just stop at physical appearances; their voice, their tone, too, resonated with my own. From the way they’re dressed, to the way they tucked their knees into their arms as they sat down, still with that sheepish expression, was one all too familiar in my own reflections.

They awaited a response as they looked out into the overcast sky, periodically sneaking glances in my direction to be met with what I was sure to be my look of disinterest slowly melting into an authentic curiosity.

“Yeah… I guess so” I responded monotonously.

The familiar stranger nodded in concurrence as their mouth seemed to open ever so slightly to speak, only no words came out. The soothing washes of the waves filled an otherwise awkward silence with some solace. It wasn’t unpleasant to not speak. In fact, it was rather soothing. Neither of us seemed like we needed to be anywhere but here.

Though before long, curiosity got the better of me:

“So… what’s up with this huh?” I gestured towards them.

“Huh?” They responded seemingly automatically. “Oh, oh yeah… the whole… the whole I look exactly like you thing, yeah…”

“Yeah?”

“Well uh… well actually now that I think about it I think I had it the wrong way around, but hey you look nicer from this angle anyway!”

I was only more confused now.

They furrowed their brows in embarrassment.

“Right yeah, yeah, okay… okay, I’m really sorry— can I… can I have a do over?”

“Sure…” I didn’t know how else to respond.

“Okay… Hi, what I’m about to say may sound very ridiculous, but hello, I am kind of like… you’re creator?”

I chuckled. “What, like god?”

A tense smile stretched across their face as they looked down on the gravelly beach. Oh my god they can’t be serious.

I took a deep breath and let the salty seaside air fill my lungs.

“You’re serious?”

Their smile stretched further across their face as their hands moved around in circles as they, seemingly fully aware of how ridiculous it sounded, replied through their teeth: “Yeeeaaaah?”

They’re serious.

I covered my eyes with my hands and rubbed the ridge of my nose.

“Oh but it sounds so weird when you put it like that!” They followed up frantically, their hands gesturing in rhythm with every word.

“Okay yeah, but you know full well how ridiculous that sounds right?”

Their hands fell down alongside their gaze in a spent manner.

“Okay yes, but also—” 

They took a deep breath, and held out their right hand towards the sea, almost as if they were anticipating a ball, and stared. My eyes followed, and noticed little ripples starting to form across the surface of where they looked.

These ripples however, shrank; slowly becoming smaller before they all fused into droplets of water that jumped into the sky and landed in a singular point, where the pebble I had thrown into the sea came flying into their hand.

“There” they said, handing the pebble back to me.

Well fuck.

“So uh… scale of 1 to 10 how’re we doing about now?” The stranger asked, their eyes squinted in embarrassment.

“You’re god??” I exclaimed in disbelief.

“No… I said I created you, and maybe also this world… god’s a title with way too much responsibility, god knows I don’t want that,” They said. “Hehe… god knows…”

The wind blew the same as it did before. The waves were still reaching for the rocks. Nothing seemed to change upon this revelation… but I don’t know what I expected either.

“4,” I replied, “4…”

The stranger looked towards me in a sense of relief.

“Ah… well that’s… that’s good… I think…”, they said uncertainty.

Questions raced into my head a million a second, but they raced away just as fast as I sat there dumbfounded in front of god themself. I tried to reach out for one of the questions speeding by, losing my grip over and over before one finally stuck.

“So what’s… what’s this about?” I gestured once more in their general direction.

“Hm?”

“You said you created me… and this world right… So why look like me?”

“Oh…”

“Why me?” I asked again, unable to hold back a chuckle.

“Oh um… well it’s complicated.”

“Good thing it seems like we’re in no rush.”

“...”

“Yeah…”

The sides of their mouth turned upwards as they seemed to search for the words in their head to explain.

“Well… I made you in my image, you’re all that I know… does that make sense?” They looked at me.

“Uh… sorta? Can you be more specific?”

“Okay, how about… okay…” they paused and placed their hand on their chin, “You… are me!.. My own impression of me… of who I’m supposed to be…”

“Wow…” I said in disbelief once more.

“Yeeeeeaaaaaaah…”

“...”

“...”

The cold salty air skidded over my skin and blew through my hair.

“You got problems,” I said to god.

“I know,” They replied sheepishly once more, “I know…”

I felt a sly grin skip across my face:

“So… if you made me in your image…”

“I should know what you have on your mind? Yeah I do… let’s get this over with” They finished for me.

“Glad you’re cooperative,” I teased.

The cold gravelly beach beneath us gave way to a large throw towel as pillows and blankets appeared seemingly from nowhere. A soothing warmth slowly took over the biting chill of the cold seaside wind, followed by the cricket songs beginning to chirp as the sunlight behind the fog started to dim. 

We both settled into comfortable positions devoid of back pain to seemingly both of our surprises. I reached out my hand and without words leaving my lips, a nice cup of tea appeared before me.

“Why thank you,” I said.

“Please, it’s the least I can do,” They replied, just as much smug in their tone, only within that smug, a dot of shame.

“So, let’s start with the classic, impossible to lift boulder?”

“I’ll get back to you on that… I’m still trying to figure that out myself”.

“What about religions, which got it the most correct?”

“Whichever one I feel like drawing inspiration from.”

“And…” I paused… I looked towards the stranger, and they let out a deep and tired sigh.

“... and all the pain and suffering in the world?”

“...”

An expression of exasperation leaked out of their eyes. They laid down on the towel and put their hands on their stomach, and with one breath, seemed to breathe out the tension stored in their body.

“I didn’t know any better…” god said.

“What do you mean?”

“...”

“I may have created this world, and you too, but they were created in my image… my image of my world.”

They closed their eyes and seemed to focus on the relaxing melody of the waves.

“I… I didn’t know any better, to create a world where there wasn’t any suffering. I couldn’t imagine a world without it.”

“I didn’t know any better.” They repeated.

They breathed in…

…

…

And out…

Twilight started to shine through the fog over the horizon, the overcast skies starting to drift away as the zenith was slowly glazed with a beautiful burnt orange. 

The familiar stranger turned towards me, their head resting on their arm half-propped up.

“Y’know that got me thinking…” they said, “All this um… all this talk about believing… and faith… y— y’know the deal. All this talk’s got me thinkin’...”

“I may not be able to say for my own world but… has it ever crossed your mind that… maybe god doesn’t believe in themself?” god asked.

“Huh? You lost me there”

“I can’t imagine a world without pain and suffering…” they said, “I mean yeah, undoubtedly the world has so many great things in it, beautiful views… music… oh and the food, I just love food so much, but… I can’t imagine all that without the pain and suffering… and there’s so much of that too.”

“I… I don’t believe in myself sometimes…”

“... I don’t believe I can make a world without suffering if… if it’s all I’ve known…” god said.

Well fuck.

“Well fuck,” I replied.

The burnt orange had now slowly begun to dwindle as the purple of night took over, the clouds in the sky stretched into wisps of remnants, giving way to the shining night filled with glimmering stars dotted across the heavens, fading in and out of focus as they danced with each other. The moon glistened brightly in the distance, illuminating the top of the fog over the horizon as the voices of seagulls and people continued to echo throughout, harmonizing with the cricket songs chirping in blades of grass scattered around the stony beach.

The wind continued to blow a chill into the boulders still out of reach of the now wine-dark sea, throwing clumps of seafoam at them in a whimsical manner, knowing tomorrow morning they will once again be in embrace. 

The familiar stranger sat beside me, staring into the distance.

“In your image huh?” I asked.

“In my image…” a slight nod of acknowledgement in their head as they spoke.

There was no other place we needed to be than here.

Not for me.

Not for them.

Not for the earth, the sea, the sky nor the stars…

[mywifeleftme]

190: White Noise // An Electric Storm

An Electric Storm White Noise 1969, Island

I’ve read a decent amount on how White Noise’s An Electric Storm was made over the course of a year of painstakingly splicing tape by hand in a London flat, but not why they decided to make their pioneering electronic music opus so ooky-spooky. I guess when you coop up folks whose day job is making Dalek noises, you’re going to get something a bit deranged. The opening side’s psych pop is jaunty enough, though there’s often something vacant-eyed in its whimsy, like a carnival in a Stephen King story: your ear is drawn to the incongruous details that hint at some darker working behind the cutesiness. It prepares you well for the flip, where across its 11-minute runtime “The Visitation” opens multiple echo chambers full of sobs, previews the next decade of horror film title themes, and digs pits of gurgling electronic unease that spored whole genres of dark ambient music still evolving to this day. The album ends on a literal (well, fake literal) Satanic ritual in the form of “Black Mass: An Electric Storm in Hell,” which turns jazz drummer Paul Lytton into the Jacob’s Ladder poster. Leader David Vorhaus likes to wryly shake his head recalling how the A&R people at Island Records didn’t “get it” when he turned in the LP, but even as someone who does “get it” I uh get why they didn’t!

An Electric Storm is chiefly discussed for the means of its production, and that’s fair: despite digital advances in recording technology that make the most advanced techniques found here (phasing, flanging, looping) virtually effortless, it is uncanny hearing them deployed so extensively on music of this vintage. It’s the equivalent of watching a film from the ‘60s and seeing effects that look like The Terminator. The music rarely goes more than a few bars before melting into some other shape (a melodic phrase begun on one instrument is spliced so it resolves on another; the music drops out entirely, replaced by a collage of ratcheting noises, electronic bloops and choking cries somewhere between anguish and laughter). By turning over a third of “My Game of Loving” to cringey orgasm sounds, they even initiate the nascent electronic pop genre into the elite fraternity of styles that are a little too eager to prove they fuck.

The lyrics won’t win any prizes, but I do take issue with how dismissive some writers have been of these songs as songs. An Electric Storm is steeped in the psychedelic tropes of the day, but it doesn’t sound like the work of avid fans of like the Electric Prunes or whatever. One senses that Vorhaus and BBC Radiophonic Workshop regulars Delia Derbyshire and Hodgson have a general but disinterested notion of what the kids are into, and they feed it back to us through the filter of their own predilections. Derbyshire’s two co-writes in particular are anything but generic. The rippling transformations of “Love Without Sound” are as wondrous and eerie as a Winsor McCay Little Nemo strip, but it’s the opiated vocal by the otherwise unknown John Whitman and the strolling melody that ebbs in and out of the collage that give it a dreamy logic. “Firebird” has a Beach Boys-y bounce and gorgeously arranged harmonies to go with an array of synth tones so solid and colourful I want to play with them like toy blocks.

Though it didn’t set the charts ablaze, An Electric Storm developed a reputation as a tripper classic, and I was pretty psyched to find a copy in not too battered condition for a reasonable price at a shop this summer. I’m glad to have it on the shelf, and with the exception of the 45 seconds that makes my neighbours think I’m listening to weird and bad porn, I always enjoy the adventure when I get it on the table.

190/365

[threadsun]

Favorite color? You can’t help but ask them why that’s the first question they ask you “Someone’s favorite color can say a lot about them, and it’s something most people know off the top of their head. It also probably comes from how many kids I meet” You tell them you were wondering why they were so colorful “Oh, well that’s because I’m literally a clown. Though I guess all my bright colors do make me look like I’m from a cartoon, huh?” You two chuckle and you agree with them, saying that they’d make a great action figure

Jack laughs at this “Aww, you’re too kind, I’ll let you know if our merch team ever makes one. I’d love to see you play with me” A shiver runs up your spine as their voice dips into something lower, seductive even, before snapping back to his original tone “How’d you like Rory? He’s pretty great, right?” The tone shift makes your head spin for a second before responding, agreeing that Rory is nice to talk to “Yeah, he’s really sweet when you get to know him, he’d make a great harem member if I might be so bold” You chuckle and ask if he has a harem “Huh? Oh…you don’t know much about what leading the cult entails do you?”

Your face falls, that familiar feeling of anxiety pooling in your stomach. You ask him what he’s talking about “Well, there are a lot of things the leader is expected to do but one thing you’ll have to establish is who gets to be in your harem. People will flock to you once they all know you’re here and all of them want to please you. The harem is a system that makes sure people don’t do something stupid like try to have sex with you in public” You laugh, they don’t

You look at him for a moment before asking if he’s serious “Oh yeah, it was a real problem before the founder established his. If you’re still unsure who you’d like to be in it by week's end just pick someone you’re friends with to hold them off. Though make sure you tell them they’re just there because they're your friend, don’t wanna kill anyone now, do we?” even though you’re both outside in the afternoon sun you feel ice cold, you’d expected weird shit, it is a cult after all, but this is just something else. You can’t even tell if they’re kidding about your rejection killing someone, the way he says it is so flat, like they’re telling you the sky is blue or fire is hot

You tell them you’ll keep it in mind and you start to look around as you try to think of another conversation topic. As you do you notice all the houses look nearly identical, not an uncommon occurrence in neighborhoods to be sure, but it’s more than a little uncanny. Every now and again you see a group of children playing after school, all of them wave at Jack as you pass by. You remember them saying that they talked to a lot of kids and decide to ask them about it

“Oh, I’m the elementary teacher! Though I also do counseling for the older kids. It can be rough going through life alone, I just wanna be there them” It’s only when their voice drops do you realize they’ve been performing this whole time. Their voice has been light, almost bubbly all this time, but in that moment they sound so down to earth, like they really care about these kids. You can’t help but smile

“Oh, here we are!” Their voice regains its bouncy quality as he walks down someone’s driveway “Now, I’ll make sure to tell him who you are but don’t be surprised if he gives you a bit of a death glare when he sees you. Jean’s never been fond of newcomers” You thank them as they knock on Jean’s front door. It takes a minute but eventually the door opens, the man inside looks a bit awkward, having to cross his left arm over to open it. He gives you your warned death glare before it turns to something more confused “Hey Jean, I thought I’d bring you some coffee cake after your readjustment. This is-” Jean’s eyes widen and before they can get it out, Jean says your name

Sorry if this one feels a bit short, but I find it only hurts a project to extend it but hope you like it anyhow! Also sorry for sending in so many things at once my brain is just buzzing

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm losing my mind at how good this is!!!!!!!!! The way you write all the characters is so good!!!! Also flirty Jack 👀😳

[comicbookhyperfixationtime]

Uncanny X-Men #195- It Was a Dark and Stormy Night

Last Issue Recap: A routine stakeout on Juggernaut turned nasty when Nimrod showed up and started blasting. He was barely driven off thanks to a clutch move by Rogue, but the X-men's decision to let Juggey go without a fight has landed them in even hotter water with the public. Meanwhile, Ruskies are scheming and Storm's off in Africa.

This cover is so amazingly dumb and beautiful and I love it. Like, its literally Wolverine about to murder a child. Everyone's expression is gold. Of course its a fakeout, Wolverine isn't going to murder a child this issue, but I'll be damned if its not effective at grabbing my attention. I vaguely recognize these kids from a Thor comic from the same era they should up in but I'll be damned if I remember a thing about them. I guess Marvel was pushing them really hard at the time. Edit: after doing some research I have discovered the Power Pack was actually created by one of the Marvel comics editors, which explains a lot about their seeming omnipresence.

The opening narration gives a brief summation of who these little rascals are (they are called Power Pack, a quartet of siblings who were given powers by a dying alien Green Lantern style) which explains them I guess but also doesn't explain them at all.

We see the Power Pack in bed with their parents, awoken by the sound of thunder. Because, its a Dark and Stormy Night, get it? What a waste of a good title, why would you name an X-men story "It Was a Dark and Stormy Night" when Storm isn't even there?! A great pun, flushed down the drain.

I think the following dialogue is a good example of Claremont's limits as I writer. Even though I can tell he's trying to simplify his style for kids, this dialogue is still quite longwinded and a bit too verbose. Of course, struggling to write convincing child dialogue isn't a Claremont specific problem, I don't recall Power Pack sounding any more natural in the Thor comic they showed up in. But in the Thor comic, the characters I actually cared about showed up pretty quickly. We spend the first third of this comic with these kids as the only focus, so the awkward dialogue starts to really grate. Doesn't help that the art on the kids is not so hot, their bodies are sometimes weirdly proportioned, and their faces misshapen. Kids are clearly not John Romita Jr's wheelhouse, although he's a great artist.

The Power Pack realizes their parents and neighbors have forgotten who they are, and what's more, all their possessions have been cleared out like they never existed in the first place! This is an excellent setup that will quickly become an extremely stupid plot hole.

The phonetic accent is... certainly a choice. It's Claremont in the 80s, could be worse I guess. But more importantly, these children call themselves the Power Pack... and their their last name is "Powers"... and they don't even wear masks! Wikipedia tells me they had secret identities, how the heck did they keep that up?!

The kid's parents are about to call the police, so they make a run for it, using their powers to blast a hole through their apartment building and causing massive property damage rather than leaving like normal people, I guess because we needed to establish their powers. This doesn't really help me understand their power sets at all, though. Also their personalities are pretty much interchangeable, except for perhaps the youngest, so no matter how many times they repeat each other's names I'm not going to remember them. Best I can gather, the youngest girl absorbs (matter? energy?) to make things explode, the brown haired boy turns into mist, the older girl has Canonball powers but with the pansexual flag, and the oldest boy does gravity manipulation?

The children decide that this series of unfortunate events must be the doing of Annalee, a Morlock who'd previously attempted to forcefully adopted them, with the help of another Morlock with memory manipulation powers. You might say to yourself, "but Fix, this makes no sense because if the Morlocks could access the Powers' house and steal all their stuff why wouldn't they have just kidnapped the kids as well?" You would be right! Unfortunately, so are the kids.

The kids decide to confront the Morlock's themselves, rather than try to find help in the city where literally every other person is either a superhero or related to them, which does seem like the sort of idiotic action a child would take.

The X-men, Spiderman, Cloak and Dagger and Thor?! Jesus, these kids must know everyone in the MC(omics)U! Hell, give them a few more issues and they may meet Jesus too!

The kids enter the sewers, quipping the whole time. Actually, they've been quipping throughout the entire issue; never let it be said that a mood-killing sarcastic comment in a Marvel Movie is not comics accurate. They're confronted by the Morlocks who (unsurprisingly) overpower them quickly. Only the youngest, Katie, escapes, but not before being disfigured by one of Morlocks, Masque, who has plastic surgery powers. The damage to her face is hidden from us and from the way Masque's fingers stick to Katie's flesh in a previous panel like it's hot play-dough, it must be pretty nasty. I kind of enjoyed the brief body horror here, its definitely an interesting idea, I want to see Masque again used to her full potential.

Exactly my reaction if some stranger approached me talking like that.

We finally cut to the X-Mansion and Kitty having her morning breakfast/midnight snack, where its revealed she apparently does some work for the Power Pack's father. Not sure if she's a student assistant or an intern or what have you, especially since she's supposed to be a highschooler, but it doesn't matter because this will never come up again!

She living my life fr fr. Love the little detail of the milk missing the bowl.

We finally get a reveal for what Masque did to Katie's face and I'm going to be honest it really doesn't look that bad. Nowhere near as horrifying as Kitty's mullet.

Kitty and some of the other of the X-men rescue Katie. Not Nightcrawler, though "he's on another mission." Boooooo. I might as well just stop reading. Unfortunately, my completionist tendencies urge me onward, although I expect the next issue to be a totally Nightcrawler-centric or I'm going to write a letter to the editor.

Rachel recaps the first half of the issue via telepathy for the X-men, who vow to help the little tyke.

No she's fucking not, she was literally introduced kidnapping torturing and attempting to rape Angel! I seriously don't get how the X-men manage to gloss over that in all of her subsequent appearances, or why she's ever written as remotely sympathetic (aside from the fact Claremont wants to get stepped on). I'd put her on par with Mastermind for deplorable levels.

Kitty is unanimously elected Team Leader. You got to love a team of people so dysfunctional that the teenager is their current most competent member. This does explain why the best boy has been so unceremoniously left out this week, as Nightcrawler probably wouldn't enact a plan as boneheaded as "rush head-on into Morlock territory with one of the children you're trying to rescue. I can't blame her, though, she is literally a child.

We get a cute little character moment where Wolverine comforts and bonds with a scared Katie that I kind of mentally glossed over because I don't care. It's not that it's poorly written or anything (although it is longwinded), its just I'm really not invested in these kids we never met and their emotional struggles I've been introduced to five minutes ago. I just want to get to the part where people punch each other already.

And get to the punching we shall! The X-men find the room where Annalee is keeping the children, and their stuff.

Average College Dorm Experience.

To the X-men's shock and horror, the Morlocks have mutated the other Powers' children to be slightly uglier as well! They've also brainwashed them to think Annalee is their real mother. Again, why this couldn't have been done when they snuck into their house to steal all their furniture, I don't know.

The X-men start brawling with the brainwashed kids, plus a menagerie of Morlocks. Rogue is kicking ass but gets whammied by Leech, who whammies himself in the process. I'm really enjoying the creative scenarios that Rogues' powerset can create. She's definitely the highlight of this issue.

Leech temporarily strips Rogue of her powers, meaning she'll have to take out the Morlocks the old fashioned way, which she does no problem because Rogue is a badass.

Damn, Aang really let himself go.

Meanwhile, for the rest of the team (sans Rachel who just disappears for a couple pages?) the mooks start coming and they don't stop coming, so Kitty Pryde slips off to rescue the kids herself while Wolvie performs gratuitous offscreen violence. She gets Annalee to surrender with a quick "what would your dead children think?" speech, at which point peak femcel Callisto shows up, just in time to be useless.

The plot is resolved, and Annalee finally processes her trauma from her children's death and makes peace with the Power Pack. And then Rachel and her rattail show back up to let the team know they're being summoned to the X-Mansion... by Magneto, for Secret Wars II!

Wait didn't we just have Secret Wars?!

Oh god, we're entering the Age of the Event Comic, aren't we?! There's going to be a new one every year (at least every 12 issues!) and its going to be convoluted and my completionist ass is going to read every single one of them. But not here because I don't want to.

Anyway, this was a waste of an issue. Usually I'm chill with a breather episode, but I don't care about Power Pack and this wasn't really that fun. The X-men weren't given a lot of time to shine, especially Rachel and poor, poor Kurt. Especially since now I'm going to have to speedrun through Secret Wars II real quick just to make sure I'm all caught up on the drama (expect a brief, unhinged review coming soon).

[fox-beyond-the-veil]

Oooo okay. Long post lol, break for your poor dash space. May or may not have almost missed my train stop writing this oops

1 - which category of alterhumanity do you belong to?

I am a physical nonhuman and fictionhearted! ^-^

2 - what/who is/are your type(s)?

I'm a kitsune - the shrine guard variety. Tail count is somewhere between 5-7, i don't actually know and i don't normally like having more than one tail at a time. It's tiring and inocnvenient lol

My hearttype is lynette, from genshin impact.

3 - do you experience shifts? What about cameo shifts?

Uhhhh... no? I guess. I'm always fox, all the time. Sometimes my form is more in line with my human shell/vessel/whatever it is, but i'm always a bit uncanny at the very least. Phantom tail, always. Ears, teeth, claws, eyes almost always. Hind paws/legs and muzzle, often. Forepaws and the rest semi-often. I am never human though. I have some control over this, too. Usually i am an anthro fox, a little more feral than the average fursona.

I can go full fox when tired or stressed though. Classic kitsune behavior, noping out in fox form haha

Tails vary too but i almost always have one, to the point where I don't know the max amount.

Cameo shifts... i've had wings before, probably, though i have a hard time telling what's wing and what's just forepaws.

Occasionally i might have cameo shifts as lynette but i think that's just me mimicking her.

4 - how do you experience alterhumanity in everyday life?

Hard to answer. I don't know what it's like to be human. You could say everything i do is alterhuman-flavored.

I'm an outside observer to humanity. I find them fascinating and i generally quite like them, though dealing with them personally is both tough and a slog ngl.

And I don't like their rules. Or their being total jerks to nature. What do you mean i have to do stupid work things when i just wanna curl up between the roots of a wisened old pine tree?

5 - what do you think of the community?

Here on tumblr? Great. Elsewhere it gets... gatekeepy? Sometimes? Esp on tiktok eugh. And i feel like the pups these days have a lot more misconceptions about what alterhumanity even is.

Otherwise tho people are generally very nice and accepting. And i personally just like the fact that i can call my "hands" paws, "fingernails" claws and such without people looking at me weirdly. Not that i mind that too much, it's just nice to do that where it can't bother me at all.

Bonus points for a lot of interesting advice and perspectives. And fashion.

6 - what are the things that make you the most comfortable/euphoric?

It/its pronouns! They're fantastic and creaturey. I like them.

Well, i have gear, but I don't wear it much. For me it's filing my claws to make them look right and painting them black, and eating foods that remind me of things i would have had (give me mochi - just the mochi, no filling needed - and i will kill for you), dropping the human mask as much as i can, and so on. I like surrounding things with (ancient usually) japanese themes like games and decor, and also fox things. I'm learning japanese too, though slowly because i only have the one brain cell.

And i do arts. In this case it's paper mache fox masks and (very amateur) magic tricks, because what's a fox without illusions? (I have no stage presence it's terrible but hey, do stuff you're bad at sometimes). And yeah that last one is also helpful with connecting with lynette :>

Speaking of her i draw her a lot, and drink tea (and zone out). I actually have a version of her teacup and saucer i made at one of those pottery painting places, and tea and madeleines are super relaxing. Seriously make a cup of tea and zone out for a bit it's really nice!

I also have part of her cosplay (wig, ears, tail) and one day i'm gonna have the whole thing. It's just expensive bc my sewing capabilities are pretty limited.

7 - do you experience species dysphoria?

Not too much. Not being able to shapeshift is really annoying, and the human vessel is... not nearly as sharp or graceful as it should be. Its hearing is also rather disappointing. I also find it hard to emote well without my ears and tail being physical, as they... aren't visible, but I move them anyway. But ah well, i suppose there's a reason i'm like this...?

8 - what advice would you give to a newly-awakened young alterhuman?

Take your time. Don't feel forced to have all the answers right away. It took me years to figure out what i was, and i am ALWAYS fox. I still don't know many things.

It is also okay to change your labels. If you are, say, a wolf therian, but then discover being a shadow entity is more your speed, then it's okay to be not a wolf therian anymore. And you can have multiple 'types of multiple kinds, there is no limit.

And it is very important to be yourself. You do not have to wear gear or do quads or even discuss or express your identity much if you don't want to. Conversely it's ok to do things that many will consider "weird" or "cringe" - just don't hurt anyone or yourself of course. There are always gonna be people who don't like whatever it is, and trying to sanitize yourself for them is more trouble than it's worth. That goes for everything in life, honestly.

And being "closeted" is also ok. Like i said, no one has to know if you don't want them to.

Oh and also do your research please. Not just so that you don't fall for falsehoods, but also because there are just... so many creatures out there! Having a "common" 'type is perfectly ok, but don't limit yourself to just what you can think of off the top of your head :)

9 - do you have/want gear?

I have it. Don't usually wear it - it doesn't match up or move right, unfortunately. I do like the tail i have though, because when i'm standing it's the right size.

Will not stop making fox masks tho.

Also have a nice kitsune mask-patterened cloth mask with ear loops, a nose wire and a filter. Wear it to work, and elsewhere, because i work in an airport. It's nice and a little helpful even if the nose doesn't quite line up haha would recommend

10 - do you know/have any theories about the origin of your alterhumanity?

I don't know. I've been trying to piece it together. Part probably that i'm neurodivergent (many flavors - adhd for sure, id'd as gifted, who knows what else bc i can't be bothered to test); maybe where my hearttype came from. But fox? Not sure... it's spiritual, like, i'm here for a reason, i think. There's something i've gotta do i believe i'm just not sure what. And I don't meditate much because getting my brain to sit down and shut up is a bit difficult as you can imagine. Uhm... i might be dead? Or something?

11 - tag someone!

@arelenforyadarlin you're up if you haven't already! Sorry if this pings you twice with the reblog and/or you don't wanna :3 (and also for the l o n g)

If you are a alterhuman, reblog and answer these questions!

(don't be afraid to write a lot, do what you want ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯)

1/ Which category of alterhumanity do you belong to?

2/ What/who is/are your type(s)? (if you have any)

3/ Do you experience shifts? If so, can you tell us your most common shifts and your strangest cameo shift (if you've ever had a cameo shift)?

4/ How do you experience your alterhumanity in everyday life?

5/ What do you think of the community?

6/ What are the things that make you most comfortable and euphoric in your alterhumanity?

7/ Are you experiencing species dysphoria?

8/ What advice would you like to say to a young alterhuman who has just awakened?

9/ Do you have/want to have gears?

10/ Do you know/have any theories about the origin of your alterhumanity? If so, tell us! (all beliefs are legitimate)

11/ Tag someone/a creature to answer these questions!ㅤᵕ̈

[reviewsclown]

Avatar 2009

You entirely forget about the earth in this movie, with how much it focuses on Pandora, but the grimy shitty cyberpunk dystopia of earth is pretty cool, entire solar system is colonized and everything is shitty, and they're hard at work trying to do the same thing to Pandora with large mining operations for unobtanium or whatever, anyways the Avatar program is, interesting, racefaking so as to colonize the planet easier(?) also the military fucking loves killing natives in a companys interest, unsurprising. Anyways, Sully is quickly out of his element, losing his gun and his squad, and now has to team up with the natives, a sexy blue girl with no skin covered, lucky that she's one of the ones that understands English, also she's much more in tune with nature than the average city-dweller and has different beliefs, whoda thunk. The incompetent shareholder guy who's just there for profits literally says, killing natives looks bad but not making money is worse, they need to bulldoze this native village asap. Also Jake is like, a white saviour I guess? They had the sign from Eywa with the seeds landing on him, and he tames the weird special bird which is a very rare event because he's a very special boy. War happens, there's some good graphics, they win but also earth could just send more people so are they going to win on the long-term? not important for this movie, there's like 6 sequels to cover that.

This movie is famous for it's CGI so that's what there is to talk about, the technology, it's alright but it's nothing stand-out, it's definitely realistic future, spaceships look like modern spaceships, planes look like stealth bombers, all the human's are just wearing regular modern military costumes, etc etc. The mech suits are kind of cool but also a bit doofy looking, but it's a good realistic type design. Now the Na'vi CGI is the real focus here, the entire alien bodies are pretty good looking, a bit ugly but that's maybe because they're meant to be hybrids, weird human faces, they're also just very tall and lanky, a little uncanny at times. The flora and fauna, pretty good too, a lot of ferns but still pretty alien looking, and weird analogies to our species but usually blue with big eyes and a different number of limbs, the birds and the monkeys and such, with the average Pandora mammal(?) being hexapodal, you'd think the na'vi woud be too, but perhaps that's too hard with mocap in '09 and they didn't want them to be too alien, along with their very human-type faces. The alien tentacle communing with nature thing is an interesting concept, pretty good honestly, it's why they're a culture that respects nature or whatever, they know the animals feeling and its some kind of intimate bond with animals and each other.

This movie is a little interesting politically, obviously the military is the bad guys, on Pandora, but they make sure to point out that the marines back on earth, those guys are cool and fighting for freedom, but the ones on Pandora are specifically working for the company and don't reflect on the actions of the earth ones, so there's some kind of statement on the military, but a lukewarm one.

Final review: yeah that was ok, a solidly ok movie that's a little obvious, it tells its story and it tells it ok, what matters most is the powerful graphics for the time that still hold up.

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary432

11/29-30/24

friday - saturday

another slow day

which is good for me. or maybe not so slow? i made 2 songs roughly, basically. guitar synth + drums. #wow #whoa. i did it because i felt like i needed to write some riffs and hear something like that from myself because a friend sent me something super fucking crazy she made and i was like, wow, i should keep at it, and i listened back to some of the things i'm sitting on, realizing they sound better than i thought. fresh ears really help so much.

oh wow, rpgmaker mv is 12 dollars on steam... wow... probably a bad idea... silly and dumb idea... yeah... maybe i'll ask my gf for that.

here's a song i'm listening to right now.

thinking about the lyrics, it feels like a song related to the things i am, or, i can at least make that happen in my head. it also feels like a bit of a treatise or even funeral or wake for all the genderbending of rock and roll and punk and stuff, and so mourning it, it's about that void that comes after, almost. it's also about impossible things, two of them in love kind of, strange figures. i like how the song gives the woman's voice some space, at a certain point to articulate itself more fully, i feel like. songs full of this kind of lust and longing, generally, don't contain that degree of curiosity.

"he's a highschool pinup poster crush (...) he's turning all the boys into girls"

and the "i put my fingers in his mouth" beside "she's my narcotic lollipop."

also sweeter than most other love songs. i tend to say 'i hope you die' by molly nilsson is the best love song ever, but maybe that's just because its cleverness charms me. this is much smarter, much sweeter, feels truer to whatever my insides are. that's what we want from love songs, we should accept, they will never feel the same across all the methods of loving, as multiple as the living and the dead, we're all a little curious and odd, it's a strange darkness, about the feeling, on top of that, the feeling itself, for me, dim light on velour, i am cold always, but needing, it's oceanic and massive, so huge i can't tell really what it is, when it turns warm, it's that i know i'm caught in turbulence and tethered to another, knowing i would never decide to be anywhere else. this song feels similar, after some spot of meditation upon the curious feeling.

"turning all the girls into boys" is a line my girlfriend always loved, as much as the other one about boys becoming girls, too. the two of us strange things stuck up from darkness attempting to articulate and traverse a discontent with the problems of our births, and no birth ever being good enough, all we have is the act of living to churn out the strangeness we feel we are. so odd that this feeling is articulated never in the very synthetic pc music i know people think about this kind of thing with, i think. it feels so distant from how i've ever sensed myself. too bright, exacting, i guess, and the lyrics of this are as velvety and beautiful as they are grotesque + lurid. it always felt like pc music's thrust was that it was the uncanny forms pop took on + a dissociative sentimentality almost, played half for laughs and half for the ways it really makes you feel. not to say i dislike that music or anything. just ruminating i suppose.

i did not read today, i think tomorrow, my gf's going to the bookstore, and they're doing a sale and i want some books, so i asked for her to get one of a list of 3, the first pick for me, the passion according to g.h. by clarice lispector, 2nd is gary indiana's horse crazy, 3rd is maurice blanchot's awaiting oblivion. so i guess i ought to just buy rpgmaker mv thinking about this, if i really would like to fool around with it. 12 dollars for something that i might never do anything with, that's an okay investment i guess.

also did more drawing, my gf saw the thing i've been working out, she says it looks good, which feels good to hear since she's really actually worked out how to draw even though she doesn't do it as much as she seems like she'd like to.

what else to say about today? i don't know. i think i need to read some philosophy soon or something. i don't know why. i think i want to just read something like that, like, deleuze, maybe, i dunno, because i want to see where some people go wrong with trying to be that way. sometimes i see people talk about stuff, and it's like they try, but they don't get there. i guess.

spurred on, lightly, maybe by how my friend used a w.h. auden poem as a review for a cassavetes film, opening night, the poem and review are as follows:

He watched with all his organs of concern How princes walk, what wives and children say; Reopened old graves in his heart to learn What laws the dead had died to disobey; And came reluctantly to his conclusion: "All the arm-chair philosophers are false, To love another adds to the confusion, The song of pity is the devil's waltz." And bowed to fate and was successful, so That soon he was the king of all the creatures: Yet, shaking in an autumn nightmare, saw, Approaching down an empty corridor, A figure with his own distorted features That wept, and grew enormous, and cried Woe.

i am intensely, deeply, obsessed with "what laws the dead had died to disobey," it's the kind of writing that makes you feel that none of your words have been enough, that you've failed to understand anything, i don't know. it hit me, in a painful way, in a beautiful way. what laws the dead had died to disobey. it makes me want to cry, it overwhelms me, paired with the sense always that when i read poetry, it is foreign, that i can't understand it (there are those i have seen and known who seems to love that it can do this to others), despite it feeling as much, as well, that it speaks itself clearly. i guess this is why so many of my poems tend towards narratives. this is too, i suppose, this is a narrative of a kind but it's so fine with itself, comfortable with its looseness. shaking in an autumn nightmare. so of course, i've gone and downloaded an auden book to pick through. i was also thinking, recently, i need to read more poetry if i seem to be ending up writing it. i should be more thoughtful, i have to be smarter, better, than i am. always. but tomorrow i need to really read more flannery, yes yes yes, always more to do. my emotions feel so fine, right now. it's odd. i'm a little disappointed in myself for not sleeping soon enough lately. i also broke my fasting today because we ate mcdonald's. my fasting is just avoiding eating for the first 6 hours after waking up. i do it most days, it honestly feels kind of good. i wonder if that's crazy?

i don't think so, really.

all my organs of concern. oh, so taken with his way with words. it envelops me, in some way, it's not confusion, it's a new tunnel. reopened grave, in keeping with his words.

something else before bed, i've been watching someone play siren 1 recently, supergreatfriend. i really like that game, i always tried to play it, i bought it on my ps4 and it just would not play... so weird!!! and i emulated it and the emulation at the time would just not work on a certain level, when it gets to daytime with kei, i believe. it's probably fixed now... anyhow, i love how it jumps around in time, it feels so genuinely experimental as a thing, it feels like there's a sort of affect it reaches that hasn't been hit since by other horror games really, or even other kinds of horror-related art of any kind. it's disorienting and surreal in ways we don't typically see, it's willfully obtuse but that's only half of it, the other half is that it's a game that is at its root about having to see from others, violently parting you from your 'perspective' and supernaturally dragging you around, these people subject to a tangle of time, tangle of views, such a particular nightmare, it really comes off as close to a dream honestly.

now i should really be sleeping,

so,

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 294: A Half-Assed Escape

Previously on BnHA: Mirio was all “SURPRISE I’M BACK THANKS TO OUR RESIDENT SEVEN-YEAR-OLD WHO RECENTLY EARNED HER BACHELOR’S OF BEING A TOTAL BADASS.” Kacchan was all, “you know what, Dabi’s been trending long enough, time to remind the fandom what a real G looks like,” and he blasted his little bleeding body back into the fray and was all “FROM HERE ON OUT CALL ME DYNAMIGHT!!” Mirio was all, “AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... oh, you’re serious,” and Kacchan was all “!!”, and so that’s the story of how my son got murdered twice in one day. Meanwhile in the Todoroki Drama Zone, Deku was all “STOP MURDERING MY FRIEND” and Dabi was all “THAT’S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS” and fandom had a whole big debate about Whether Or Not Dabi Trying To Murder Deku’s Friends And Mentors Is Any Of Deku’s Business, which went exactly how you think it went. Anyway, so then Deku yelled at Dabi, and Endeavor was all moved by his manly words and randomly went to go uppercut Machia in the chin. And, seeing as how the Momoserum finally chose that exact moment to kick in, Machia is now down for the count.

Today on BnHA: The Miriosquad handles the Nearly High End Noumus, freeing up Jeanist to jasphyxiate (okay that one doesn’t really work so well) the rest of the League. Compress is all “TIME FOR THIS MILD-MANNERED SIDE CHARACTER VILLAIN TO SHINE”, except that by “shine” what he actually means is “use his quirk to punch a literal hole right through his own ass to free himself.” The rest of the chapter is basically just a back and forth between him and Jeanist, with Jeanist trying to recapture him, and Compress repeatedly thwarting him by chopping more holes out of himself because HE’S FRESH OUT OF FUCKS, AND THE ONES AT THE STORE ARE ALL SOLD OUT, MOTHERFUCKERS. Anyway, so with Compress basically dying and all, Horikoshi is all “you know what that means”, and delivers a freshly-baked villain flashback revealing that Compress is a descendant of Harima Ouji, a.k.a. the Peerless Thief, a.k.a. some famous guy whom Gentle mentioned this one time for like two seconds back in the day. The chapter ends with Compress finally demasking himself and dumping Tomura back onto the ground, a.k.a. The Worst Possible Place For Tomura To Be. ( •﹏•)

WHY IS CRUST HERE YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD

-- OH WAIT, SHIT. OH

AIZAWAAAA you’re alive and receiving medical help thank GOD. HOW MANY EYES DO YOU HAVE. AND MIRKO!! HOW MANY LIMBS DO YOU HAVE, OMG

so is this Aizawa dreaming about Crust’s final moments, then?? jesus. with All Due Respect to Crust’s memory, does Aizawa not already have enough misplaced guilt on his conscience as it is?? “nope, we’re gonna keep piling it on. that’s all he is now. three limbs, an indeterminate number of eyes, sexy hair, and Guilt” well shit

motherfucker y’all really out here placing an oxygen mask on Gran Torino’s corpse. fucking shounen characters. each one comes with a lifetime warranty

DAMN YOU HORIKOSHI WHY DO YOU KEEP SHOWING THESE CLOSE-UPS OF HAWKS’S UNCONSCIOUS FACE ALL WHUMPED OUT AND EXHAUSTED. HOW MUCH MORE OF THIS ARE WE GOING TO GET. ARE YOU PLANNING ON KILLING ME WITH THE UPCOMING CONVALESCENCE ARC, BECAUSE IF SO, AT LEAST HAVE THE DECENCY TO TELL ME AHEAD OF TIME SO I CAN MAKE A WILL

for a moment I considered going back and checking my previous recaps to count how many times I’ve already made a joke about Dabi’s fire incinerating Hawks’s wings but not touching so much as a hair on his five o’clock shadow, so that I could calculate whether or not I could possibly get away with making that same joke one more time. but then I realized I could just do it in this kind of roundabout way I’m doing right now instead. so there you have it

FFFFFFFMT LADY AND MIDNIGHT NOOOOO

PLEASE BE ALIVE. PLEASE RESPECT THE SIGN ON THE FRONT OF THE BUILDING. THE ONE THAT SAYS “NO LADY CHARACTERS ALLOWED TO DIE”, WITH THE FINE PRINT AT THE BOTTOM “AT LEAST NOT UNTIL HORIKOSHI GIVES US LIKE TWENTY-SIX MORE OF THEM FIRST IF THAT’S THE WAY HE WANTS TO PLAY IT.” IT’S A GOOD SIGN, PLEASE RESPECT ITS WISHES!!

so anyway though, Jeanist is giving a speech about how god knows how many people all worked together to bring Machia down. and now RHA is getting in on those fabric puns too, I see. “A SINGLE STRAND MAY BE THIN BUT TOGETHER THEY FORM A STRONG ROPE” oh so you think you guys are funny eh? I’m a frayed knot

MEANWHILE EXCUSE ME BUT WHY ARE YOU FUCKING CRYING BLOOD, HOLY SHIT

fffffff. so much for him taking over as the Number One once all this is over. so let’s just recap real quick, because Horikoshi has long since made it clear that one of his plot goals for this arc is to wipe out every single member of the Billboard Top Ten. so how we doin?

Endeavor - was just figuratively eviscerated in front of the entire nation by his homicidal zombiepunk son. also burnt half to death and possibly down a lung. will almost certainly be forced to retire after this one way or the other

Hawks - lying prettily in a medical tent. wings status: gone. hair status: still perfect

Jeanist - WELL I THOUGHT HE WAS FINE BUT APPARENTLY HE’S OUT HERE DYING, JESUS CHRIST

Edgeshot - MIA, last seen fighting Re-Destro. I really want him to have kicked RD’s ass because fuck that guy, but realistically they probably fought to a draw at best

Mirko - alive but in critical condition and missing something like 1.5 limbs

Crust - dead, currently haunting Aizawa’s traumatized dreams. now he’s gonna be triggered the rest of his life by people giving him the thumbs up, THANKS A LOT

Kamui Woods - was set on fire which is His Weakness. thoughts and prayers

Wash - last seen floating hospital patients to safety as Tomura’s wave of decay descended towards him. probably dead ffff

Old Man Samurai - haven’t seen this fucker in a hot minute, who even knows where he’s wandered off to

Ryuukyuu - currently being treated for her wounds, looked pretty bad off. but it’s hard to tell how hurt she is since most of the injuries were acquired in her transformed state. SHE BETTER GET WELL SOON

anyways, so yeah. so much for the top ten. guess that’s another reason Horikoshi brought Mirio back now, huh

so there’s a big panel of everyone fighting the Noumu while Machia lies there all “blurgh.” good riddance my dude. it took like twenty chapters and a hundred people to stop this guy so I really fucking hope he stays down. you’ve had your fun

anyway so Jeanist is sending another steel thread towards Dabi! and he’s all “just a bit more!!” fklklj this is gonna go real well isn’t it

meanwhile Mirio’s fighting a Nearly High End with all of these weird rock formations jutting out of its skin. go on and kick his ass then, Mirio

“each of these guys is probably just as strong as the Noumu from Kyuushuu” hold on I thought Ujiko or Tomura or someone said that wasn’t the case? not that Mirio would know I suppose. anyways let’s just hope he’s wrong cuz if not these kids are probably screwed

kLSDKFHLSKHGLKLK OH MY GODDDD

IIDA FUCKING TENYA YOU’RE A PEACH. THINKS THE NAME IS OUTRAGEOUS, CHECK. USES IT ANYWAY, CHECK. “JUST BECAUSE I DON’T UNDERSTAND DOESN’T MEAN I CAN’T BE SUPPORTIVE.” WHAT A CLASS ACT

AND KACCHAN IS RESPONDING WITH AS MUCH DIGNITY AS HE CAN MUSTER

WOW, SON. IT’S ALMOST AS THOUGH YOU HAVE A HOLE IN YOUR TORSO, OR SOMETHING!! although listen up, real talk, the fact that Kacchan of all people can’t muster the energy to yell at someone questioning his ability to kick ass is HIGHKEY troubling and we may be in need of an intervention here soon :/

now Jeanist is finally turning his attention to the League! was... was it not already on the League. omg

ACTUAL SCREAMING AHHHHHH FUCK FUCKLK LK AHHLKHKFFFF

hey so um. what the actual fucked up hell. my soul left my body. imagine if you saw the reflection of this panel on your bedroom window. you would never sleep again

OKAY RHA TRANSLATORS ARE YOU HAVING YOURSELF A LAUGH AGAIN

THIS CANNOT BE WHAT HE’S ACTUALLY SAYING RIGHT. BUT IT’S RIGHT IN THAT UNCANNY VALLEY OF NOT BEING QUITE SURE, THOUGH... (　ﾟдﾟ)

(ETA: just a next-day clarification here, apparently my sleep-deprived ADHD word-skipping brain completely skipped right over the “a” in that last panel, so what I read was, “and Shigaraki’s limp noodle.” so yeah, the moral of this story is always read the speech bubble carefully before you start making running jokes throughout the rest of your post, folks.)

oh wow he’s really freaking out lmao

to be fair though, I’d argue that Dabi has gotten pre-tty close at this point :’) thrilled for him, really I am

but anyway, well then figure something out you big dramatic robot-armed fiend. didn’t you just say you could touch your own ass? can you not just Compress yourself to break free?? does it not work on you? or would you be stuck afterwards lol

(ETA: I was picturing him compressing his entire body at once, not just chunks of it. ghhhlkh.)

um

holy shit Jeanist. are you stupidly trying to cut off their air, or are you going for more of a sleeper hold (jleeper hold??) thing instead. the latter would be way smarter and faster and probably safer as well just saying

but unless Spinner is just being super dramatic, it sure looks like he’s fucking strangling them djslkjlk. this will certainly cement his popularity among the villain stans. good thing you’re not running for office any time soon bud

anyway so I have no idea what these guys are trying to do now. what is this

do you even have till the count of 5 at this rate. I mean

OH MY GOODNESS

HE’S REALLY FUCKING DOING IT!! HE’S COMPRESSING HIS BUTT!! OMFG. TOMURA HIDE YOUR NOODLE!!!

WHAT THE FUCK

DID YOU COMPRESS A PIECE OF YOUR OWN ASS. FUCKING WHAT. PUT THIS MAN’S PICTURE IN THE DICTIONARY NEXT TO THE WORD “LOYALTY”, HOLY CRAP

HOLY SHIT COMPRESS

“HOLY SHIT DID THAT GUY JUST PUNCH A HOLE THROUGH HIS OWN ASS IN ORDER TO SAVE HIS VILLAIN PALS. FUCK IT, HE DESERVES TO ESCAPE”

jeez, talk about... A HALF-ASSED ESCAPE ATTEMPT :D :D :D hahaha. but real talk though, Horikoshi has clearly never tried to leap twelve feet straight up in the air multiple times in succession with only half his glutes though. everyone, I regret to inform you that this panel right here on the left may be slightly unrealistic

also where the hell is he going to go?? did you pack a jetpack away in one of those little marbles sir. and what about Dabi?? and Skeptic too, I guess, but we don’t really care about Skeptic

(ETA: at this point I had to stop reading for about two hours because I had to go out and take care of something; that’s also why this is being posted later than usual lol. anyways so where were we.)

oh my lord

the existence of a translator’s note here implies that the earlier line about Compress being able to reach Tomura’s junk was not, in fact, ad-libbed. hmm. hmmmmmmmm

anyway so now he’s grabbing Compress again because OF COURSE HE IS, so now we’re right back to square one! except now Tomura and Spinner are secured inside of little marbles, and presumably Compress is the only one who can release them

oh nevermind he’s just maiming himself again instead, SHEESH

Skeptic a man is dying please have some goddamn respect

so, uh. is he gonna die, though??

I really can’t tell wtf is going on here, this is the most confusing the art has been in a while. Horikoshi put all of his spoons into that creepyass close-up panel earlier, that bastard

OMG WHAT ARE YOU SERIOUS

DON’T FUCKING TELL ME THE “COMPRESS IS RELATED TO THIS THIEF GUY FROM OLDEN TIMES” THEORY IS ACTUALLY TRUE WHAAAAAAT. OH SHIT

so apparently Harima was a Robin Hood type guy who stole from... heroes?? wtf. are heroes the 1% in this scenario. y’all didn’t have any Fortune 500 CEOs to steal from?

THAT’S THE BLOOD THAT FLOWS THROUGH YOU, OH SHIT. and in a related oh shit, the fact that we are getting a Compress flashback now of all times doesn’t bode super well for him. ffff

MEANWHILE THE TODOROKIS ARE STILL TODOROKI-ING

listen here boy if you touch one freaking hair on Shouto’s candy cane head I swear to god --

WHAT DID I FUCKING SAY!!!

SHOUTO NOOOOOO. WTF YOU’RE LITERALLY THE ONE GUY WHOSE WEAKNESS IS ABSOLUTELY NOT SUPPOSED TO BE FIRE. DABI YOU SHIT, YOU BETTER WATCH YOURSELF!! I’M PRINTING OUT A COPY OF THAT COMPRESS PANEL!!! KEEP AN EYE OUT ON THAT BEDROOM WINDOW YOU PUNK!!!

SO NOW POOR SHOUTO IS UNCONSCIOUS AND FALLING!! SOMEONE SAVE HIM!! WHO CATCHES THE CATCHER

COMPRESS LITERALLY HOW ARE YOU STILL ALIVE RIGHT NOW, WHAT IS HAPPENING

PLEASE DON’T CALL TOMURA LEADER OF THE “PLF” YOU KNOW I CAN’T TAKE IT SERIOUSLY WHEN YOU DO THAT. ARE YOU DYING. ARE YOU JUST A FUCKING HEAD NOW WTF

(ETA: “masks are removable, makeste” you know what it’s been a long day okay lmao. or I suppose Compress is really the one who is lmao.)

GASPPPPPP

okay. okay. looooool okay then

WHY WERE YOU COVERING THIS SEXY MOP OF HAIR UNDER THAT HOOD YOU TOOL. IT WOULD HAVE LOOKED SO GOOD WITH THE TOP HAT. I’M SO MAD AT YOU RIGHT NOW

as if it wasn’t enough for him to demask himself, he also had to get all shirtless and then do this weird attempt at a sexypose too huh

hard to say exactly how much of his torso is currently missing, but safe to say that’s proooooooobably not good. :///// fuck

on the other hand, Kacchan also has a torso hole and he’s still flying around like he just drank a dozen red bulls, so

this man lost his ass and he’s still out here monologuing like it’s the last two minutes of The Prestige. one might say he is monologuing his ass off

so he let Spinner and Tomura free, but is Dabi still trapped in his marble?? wasn’t he all on fire and stuff?? hopefully he can still turn off his quirk in there because if not that’s a pretty fucked up way to die. somewhere out there Snatch’s ghost is all “YEAH I’LL SAY.” oh how the turntables

last but not least, sooooooo. Tomura. back on the ground. that’s. um. ...shiiiiiiiit

[moon-lixie]

about a letter left to be found and a boy who disappeared into thin air.

word count: 2.046k

genre: slight angst

song: 말할 수 없는 비밀 (Secret Secret) - Stray Kids

I don't think any of you would be able to understand, not even if I sit down and speak all of my truths. Still, I think I owe an explanation.

With trembling hands he gathered his things, the notebooks filled with dreams spilling from the edges of every page, his favourite hoodies, the pair of bright red headphones he had since the beginning of high school.

From the open window a cold breeze came in and ruffled the slightly damp hair of the boy, paying special attention to the ends that were still clamped together due to the dampness.

He wasn't exactly in a hurry, but he still felt nervous and anxious, because even if it was almost impossible, at the back of his mind he was haunted by the idea of someone coming in and stopping him.

Moving quickly he reached down for the towel hanging around his shoulders and ruffled his hair a couple of times more until he felt satisfied.

First of all, I have no idea where I am going but know that I'm fine.

A loud sigh caressed his lips as it escaped, filling the room that he had always called his own, his little world nobody could disrupt because in between the forgotten comics and the piles of clothes sprawled here and there he had felt more at home than he has ever felt anywhere else.

Throwing the towel to the basket of dirty laundry at the end of the hallway, he finally finished everything he had to do, simply being left with staring at himself in the mirror and fixing the wild strands of hair that had been upset by the freshly washed hoodie hugging his torso.

He could barely muster a smile at his reflection, not because he was sad, but because it all felt surreal in a sense that left him wondering if it was still the middle of the night many years ago and the last years had been nothing but the hopeful dreams of his younger self.

Maybe it's a bit selfish of me to simply leave without a warning, but please understand that I want much more than this place could ever offer me.

He closed the front door of his house, locking it with the pair of keys his mother had given him once he turned twelve; they were still held together by the Pororo keychain he had bought one day after school with such an overwhelming excitement that made the memory pull at the corners of his lips.

It felt bizarre to walk away from the entrance of his home knowing that he was never really going to come back, that this was the last time.

Just like the very first time he had arrived there along with a moving truck packed with boxes and furniture, he felt breath leave his lungs at the sight of the white façade. It made him stop for a second and contemplate in utter silence.

Goosebumps coated the length of his arms once he turned around and kept moving forward at a steady pace, leaving his old bike behind as well.

Know that the decision to leave wasn't made in a haste, I've been thinking about it for long and now just seemed like the perfect time.

Mr. Kim lazily waved in his direction, gentle smile and downturned eyes with the familiar brown that reminded Jisung of his grandfather; maybe that's where he would go next, to visit his grandfather.

Without much thought he returned the sweet and familiar greeting, feeling a bit nostalgic when he thought back to all the summers that he had spent working with the man in his garden.

Back then a young Jisung had been happy to make a few bucks while getting to stay out all day in the yard playing with bugs and with the sun kissing the skin of his chubby cheeks and legs that weren't covered by his favourite pair of green shorts.

He couldn't help but wonder where had all that time run to because despite being the one who lived through it, he could barely make sense or when had he ended up where he was.

Time moved too fast and without a warning, it left everyone wondering.

It isn't easy to leave my whole life behind but it feels right, the mere idea makes me feel lighter because who knows who I'll get to be when I get to the end of my journey.

Perhaps I'll be braver, a little bit smarter, more mature, maybe even a couple of centimetres taller.

He could walk the streets with his eyes closed and still know where every bump and crack was in the sidewalk, he could still point where his old school was, where the closest convenience store stepped in his way and as usual tempted him to buy a snack even on those days were his pockets were empty and his tummy full.

From there he knew his way to everywhere else in town, he even knew how long it would take him to get to said places on foot or with his trusty bike.

It all felt too easy and familiar, too comfortable, and those things weren't bad at all but Jisung thought he had had enough of them. He craved discovering himself inside the walls of another place so foreign that every single one of his truths were only known by himself.

Was it silly? That he thought a change of scenery would make him a new person, one much more alike to who he truly was.

Sometimes talking to someone isn't enough, because you don't think they'll understand, you know they won't. That's why I never said anything about the deepest desires looming in my heart or the biggest fears that tied me down for as long as I can remember.

All the interrogations running leaps around his mind made him walk faster, filling him with the same dreadful excitement he felt every first day of school, one that mixed with nervousness and fear.

He wasn't sure if starting fresh would let him be someone whose fears didn't weigh upon his heart so harshly, he wasn't sure if he would get to be the person he had always wished he could be but he could only hope.

Hope had been what drove him this far and today he was giving it full control of where his feet moved to, control over how his next day would look like or where he would wake up the next day.

Never in his life had he felt more ready to wander around by himself.

But I guess, since I'm going, it's only fair that I try to sit down and talk to someone, hoping that they will understand even if my words are scarce and there will be nobody to talk back to at the end of this letter.

On the horizon the sun rushed to slumber, leaving a comforting lilac pooling around the clouds and making them stand out even more.

Night hovered over his shoulders making him breathe with much more ease because if there was something that portrayed hope and tomorrow with an uncanny resemblance and lack of effort, it was the night sky with its endless stars and its shining moon.

In his childhood days he had discovered that there was no better cure for uncertainty and a nostalgic heart than staring up at the night sky; there was something about it that made him feel like time stopped for an instance, that time wasn't quite as unforgiving while the veil of darkness covered everything.

If he could go anywhere he wanted —which he was already doing— he would wish to go to the sky, not the endless and uncertain space, but the idea of the sky that humans have in their ignorance, a canvas that goes no further than our eyes can see.

Ever since I can remember I've felt like there was a place for me somewhere out there, a place I always called home without knowing what it really was.

It wasn't like I didn't feel at home here, there was just a feeling in my chest that told me out there I could feel completely free in the way I've always craved.

For him it had always felt unfair, how everyone got to live and walk around without the things that kept him back. Of course when he grew older he understood that everyone had their own problems but sometimes that was easy to ignore when one's own darkness loomed around their heart.

He had spent many years wishing, praying to whoever was listening, that he could just be himself without the voices in his head and the uncertainties that made every single one of his steps be cautious.

Nobody seemed to have listened as years went by and things got harder, still, he never gave up and even though he could never really say that there was nothing else bothering him he could at least say that he had everything under control.

If time is unforgiving it also is healing, and for him it had healed many wounds that couldn't be seen.

Unknowingly I spent a lot of time wanting to go to that place, craving to find where it was.

Some years ago I understood that it perhaps wasn't a place but a version of myself that could bring such soothing feelings. That's where I'm going to, that's why I have no destination.

He wanted to believe that nothing had been planned, that his savings carefully stuffed at the bottom of his backpack had just been him being responsible about his money and having enough for the impulsiveness that one day had won over reason and had driven him to this adventure.

He wanted to pretend but it was stupid to do now, there was nobody around to judge him or question his motives, so there was no use in not being honest with himself.

Thinking back to all those evenings spent running around the small restaurant in which he had found a job, he could see that perhaps this plan had been many years in the making.

Unconsciously he had always been hoping for a moment like this, a moment of unadulterated freedom.

Hopefully I do get there, hopefully I get to be happy and everyone I left behind does too.

The journey to happiness, to authenticity, to being unapologetically himself, had taken him to the airport, another thing that wasn't as spontaneous as he had tried to make it seem.

Passport in hand and trembling self, the whiteness of the place and the various people walking back and forth made him realise that this was really going on, he was really leaving.

For the first time in his life overthinking had no place in his plans.

I wish to be who I am meant to and disappearing was perhaps the thing I had always been destined to do. A boy who disappeared into thin air, that's who I am, a boy with secrets that weigh down on my heart and that I'm unwilling to carry with me on this journey.

Approaching the desk he was met with a young woman, in her mid twenties or early thirties, sweet but practised smile covering her lips as she recited the words that he must've learned a long time ago when she first started working there.

"I want a ticket for the next flight available," Jisung said, offering a reassuring smile after the confused look the woman gave him.

He looked around as the sounds of typing filled his ears and before he had time to start regretting something the ticket had been placed on his palm and his savings were short by a considerable amount.

I'm afraid that wasn't much of an explanation but it was my truth.

Good luck and see you whenever we're meant to cross paths.

The last thing he saw before falling asleep were the clouds from above and the sky now completely dark like the many nights he had wondered where he belonged.

Now he had an answer, he belonged wherever he felt free and right then in that comfortable plane seat he felt the freest he had ever been.