POKEMON EVIL TEAMS RANKED BY HOW LIKELY I WOULD BE TO JOIN THEM
Team Flare
I'm not wearing that suit and I'm not changing my hair. Lysandre is easily the fucking dumbest antagonist and if their plan is successful either they're immortal and I have to live with these losers forever or the whole world dies and I have to live with these losers until I die.
Team Yell
This entire team is centered around having a parasocial relationship with a teenage girl. Also British.
Team Galactic
Similar horrible haircut, bad outfit, and death cult scenario to Team Flare. At least they're like a semi-actual company. I could maybe just go bald and get a regular job after the Poke-government liquidates Team Galactic LLC. But I legitimately think this would be the least fun evil company to work at. Imagine stealing some kids Pokemon but you get chewed out by fucking Galactic Admin Uranus because you forgot to fill out the Paperwork.
The Lame Part of Team Plasma
Okay so to clarify these are the people that actually believe in the Team Plasma shit, which means I'd probably be spit on in the streets while wearing chainmail in New York. Why the fuck would I wear Chain Mail on the East Coast? Do you know how much rust there is? Also I have to become a ginger and worship some green manchild as a monarch. At least they're not a death cult.
Team Rocket
This one is just being a criminal. Like, yeah, you get to steal Pokemon but there's no real advantages except the free gray boots. Probably does not pay well and Giovanni leaving kind of sent them spiraling. Plus they have a lot of Koffings in an underground base so you know there's like lung damage galore. The R stands for Respiratory Distress.
Team Aqua
I don't like the idea of being surrounded by the ocean and I do not like boats and submarines. I would actively join this to sabotage their plan. Also every other evil team has an actual place to put their Pokeballs but this one it seems like the plan is to just shove it in my underwear? ???
Team Star
I haven't actually played Scarlet and Violet because I recently learned I can legally drink. I think this one is the equivalent of a school club? So I'm not actually getting paid to do evil shit. I'd probably just join, like, DnD club or something.
Team Rainbow Rocket
I'd join this one just because I know it's going to fail. I mean, it's got like four people who explicitly just want to end the world in different ways. I'm just gonna join and steal pens and shit until it eventually crashes in on itself for infighting. I'd wear my gay-ass R shirt every june in line with a P, I, D, and E.
The Cool Part of Team Plasma
Fuck yeah. This is the Team Plasma that knows the shit Ghetsis is up to. I'd love to be in on the scheme, plus I don't have to wear chainmail. Downside is I'd probably get murdered or have to murder to stay in, and they have the biggest shot of accomplishing their goal. But Ghetsis is hot so that's a plus.
Team Magma
This one is because there's 0.0% chance this plan will work but I get to just hang out in these cute-ass hoodies and pet camerupts all day. Look at that outfit, I'd wear that all the time. That being said, would probably have to be a field guy. Their location is in a volcano. I'm gonna get a call that says 'Hey all of Team Magma's leadership died' and I'd have to get a job at like Poke7-11 with a major gap in my resume.
Macro Cosmos
This hardly counts as a villain team because they're just, like, security guards for a company whose CEO goes a lil nuts. This is like if you worked for Virgin Atlantic and Richard Branson decided to summon Satan. No one can really put that on you. You'd probably get paid ridiculous amounts of money for essentially doing nothing. Con is you'd have to live in Galar.
Aether Foundation
Working for the Aether Foundation is like doing an internship at Bell Labs or whatever. The evil shit is probably fixed by the end of the game and I could just go back to researching Rotom electromagnetic applications and have that 'week where we tried to fuck up reality' be a weird company thing we brush under the rug. The con is they have all white outfits so I can't eat spaghetti at work. But even if I left I could probably just use Aether Foundation as a decent enough jumping off point for any career.
Team Skull
Genuinely this is just goofing off with a bunch of scummy weirdos. I can respect that and their outfits are thankfully not skin-tight jumpsuits, but main I'd join because they all kind of suck. With the most moderate competency I could run Team Skull. Also Guzma. He's pretty hot.
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new di x warrior cats
name explanations and more info below :3
basic stuff
-each agency is a clan, not each unit. 14-15 clans would be silly and then we would have some clans with 5 cats and some with 2.
-starpro -> lightclan. i couldn’t call them “starclan” for obvious reasons. light is somewhat synonymous with star, so i’m going with that.
-cospro -> nightclan. i don’t think the cats in warriors know the word “cosmic”, but cosmic implies cosmos implies night sky, so we’re going with night
-rhyth lin -> rippleclan. ripple is sort of a synonym to rhythm….? this one was hard
-new di -> fortuneclan. this one is a stretch but neither “new” or “dimension” have synonyms that really fit a clan name. fortune is something that relates to multiple characters in new di though
-starclan still sort of exists, but the cats do not believe in them the way they do in warriors. they are more of a nursery tale than anything, and select cats (ex: tatsumi) believe in them, but it is not written into their code. medicine cats can still interpret signs, but they do not necessarily think of them as coming from starclan.
-medicine cat forbidden romance is not a thing here
-intermingling of clans is ok and common
-there’s like. other cats in their clans besides just the enstars cast i assume
cat names/why i chose them
fortuneclan:
knights
-tsukasa -> scarletstar (scarletblossom) . he is the leader of fortuneclan because he is one of the new di reps for the summits. both scarlet and blossom were chosen bc of his last name (scarlet is a red color… kinda similar to cherry…. and blossom for the cherry blossom).
-leo -> lionheart. ok this one is kind of cheating because lionheart is already an existing warrior, but…come on….
-izumi -> silverspring. sora describes his color as silver, and spring is in his first name
-ritsu -> frostmoon. his first name means cold moon according to the wiki so i just rehashed it
-naru -> goldenroar. since she doesn’t like her first name i didn’t want to use “storm”, and her last name can be read as “thunder” but that’s a little too close to storm? so golden for her hair and roar for her last name
switch
-natsume -> sageeye. a sage is similar to a wizard, and eye is in his first name . also the “dovesong” mentioned is wataru :)
-tsumugi -> bluewing. he is a bluebird. warrior cats probably wouldn’t straight up call a cat “bluebird” so i put wing there instead. deputy cause he’s the vp
-sora -> skyspring . sora means sky. spring is in his last name. i could have used “stream” instead to differentiate him from sena but i think spring is cuter
mam/df
-madara -> tawnystripe . tawny bc it’s like kind of close to calico if you squint. stripe(s) is in his last name
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SERIES
- the owl house
- infinity train
- over the garden wall
- Steven universe
- star vs the forces of evil
-
FAV BOOKS
- el océano al final del camino
- coraline
- interworld + el sueño de plata
- el hogar de miss Peregrine para niños peculiares (I'm missing the last book)
-
ANIME
-Barakamon
-No game no life
-seto no hanayome
-Hare nochi guu
-Tokyo ghoul
-Mirai nikki
-Another
-Highschool of the death (hotd)
-Code breakers
-Noragami
-Ansatsu kioshitsu
-Nichijou
-Binbougami ga
-Seikoku no dragonar
-Gamers
-Nanatsu no taizai
-parasyte the maxim
-saiki kusuo no Ψ-nan
-inuyashiki
-ONE PIECE
-sword art online
-sakura kiss
-one punch man
-corpse party
-deadman wonderland
-shingeki no kyojin
-death parade
-kuroko no basket
-youjo senki
-tonari no kaibutsu kun
-hataraku saibou
-kore wa zombie desu ka?
-gabriel dropout
-osake wa fuufu ni natte kara
-kuroshitsuji
-magi
-fullmetal alchemist
-yuri! on ice
-charlotte
-death note
-no. 6
-elfen lied
-re zero
-hetalia
-god eather
-nanbaka
-mahoutsukai no yome
-tokyo magnitude 8.0
-boku dake ga inai machi (erased)
-pupa
-big orders
-kiznaiver
-dramatical murder
-new game
-kotoura - san
-Kamisama Hajimemashita
-Karakuri circus
-dororo
-tensei shitara slime datta ken 2.2
-isekai quartet
-Gangsta
-arifureta shugoku de sekai saiyou
-satsuriku no tenshi
-shounken maid
-shield hero
-dr stone
-bungo stray dogs
-Fumetsu no Anata e
-Overlord IV
-Tondemo skill de isekai hourou meshi
MANGA
-Berserk
-hataraku saibou black
-gossik
-yakusoku no neverland
-pupa
-dr stone
-satsuriku no neverland
-tensei shitara slime datta ken
-kenja no mago
-fire punch
-kono subarashii
-torture tournament
-tate no yuusha
-Appettite
-Deadman Wonderland
-made in abyss
-jibaku shounen hanako kun
-karakai jouzu no takagi san
-Fumetsu no Anata e
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