#i finished this at 7am today on christmas
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dandyleyen · 11 months ago
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Twitter post | Zelda is caught up in the snow falling around them. Link is caught up in her.
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lesbianhotch · 2 years ago
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two thousand and twenty three
notes: happy new year!!! enjoy some frankie x reader. very fluffy, very domestic, implied hanky panky. as always, dedicated to @spacecowboyhotch <3
The coffee pot in front of you gurgles slowly to life, and it may just be the sweetest sound you’ve ever heard.
While you would’ve loved to sleep in, your body refused. Too many years of waking up early had your internal clock set to no later than 7am, and even today on January 1st, after a very very long night, you had woken up before the sun.
You lean forward against the counter, elbows cushioned by your sweatshirt. You place your chin in your hands, glancing over at the untouched box next to your coffee pot. A brand new Keurig, courtesy of Will and his wife. It was sweet, incredibly so, both a Christmas gift and something to celebrate you and Frankie getting hitched. However, you were sentimental, to an almost aggressive degree. 
You loved your old coffee pot, had bought it when you bought your first apartment. It did the job, and you weren’t about to get rid of something that still worked. 
It got you through your first job,and night classes, and then your second job, and it had made its way to the home shared by you and Frankie.
You hear your husband before you see him. There’s an unmistakable grumble and shuffling of feet coming from the stairs, followed by the slap of slippers against the tile of the kitchen. It pleased you to know Frankie was still wearing the ones you had bought him for Christmas. 
Arms wrap around your middle, and Frankie rests his chin on your shoulder. You feel his overgrown stubble rub against your neck.
“Mmmm, we’re never gonna open up that damn coffee pot are we?” Frankie’s voice is still laden with sleep, and it’s warm in your ear. You shrug, and Frankie’s upper body rises and falls with your motion.
“There’s still hope.” There’s not much conviction behind your voice. “We’ve only had it for a week.” 
Frankie grunts softly, which is the best response you could ask for this early in the morning. 
You both stand there in comfortable silence, watching as the pot in front of you slowly but surely fills up with coffee. Your respective favorite mugs are already waiting for the both of you, cleaned and set out the night before. How you managed to do so while Frankie was pawing at you after you returned home from Santi’s party remains a mystery. 
You feel Frankie’s belly start to move with laughter against your back, and he nudges his nose against your cheek. 
“Even if we did want to return that coffee pot from Will, I don’t know if we could. It’s seen things.” 
After you’d finished the dishes last night, the two of you didn’t make it any farther than the kitchen table. It’d been a nice way to spend your first hour of the new year. 
 “So we can’t open it, and we can’t return it because it’s seen your butt?”
Frankie sucks in air through his teeth, head slowly nodding from side to side. 
“Mm, more than just my butt.”
You can’t help but smile, relishing in the light teasing tone of his voice. “And that’s because you like to come down here in nothing but your birthday suit, Morales.”
The coffee pot lets out one final drip, and the little red light clicks off to signify its completion. Frankie removes himself from your back, taking the warmth with him as he pads over to the fridge.
You’ve already poured a generous helping into each mug when Frankie returns, handing you the creamer. He drinks it black, a habit that started in high school and solidified in the service, and he takes a sip, no doubt burning his tongue. 
“So, what’s the plan? We going to spend the day doing uh-resolutions or something?”
You scoop some sugar into your coffee, stirring it gently with your spoon. You glance past Frankie at the window leading into the back yard, watching as sunlight starts to creep into the gray of the winter morning. Other people would love to be in your position. Up before dawn, starting the first day of the year out bright and early. You think of your notebook filled with to-do’s for you and Frankie. Chores and errands and yes- even resolutions that you plan to carry out over the year. 
But, those could wait until tomorrow. 
Your gaze shifts to Frankie, his eyes watching you over his mug as he takes another too-hot sip of coffee.
“Honestly- I really want to get back into bed.” 
Frankie smiles, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I can get behind that.”
You end up spending most of the day in bed. 
You try to tease Frankie for heading down into the kitchen nude a little while later, but then again, he is getting you a refill on your coffee. 
You remind him to close the curtains in the kitchen, and you hear his laughter as he heads down the stairs.
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nardonotes · 2 months ago
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16 sep '24
8:18pm
IM SO TIRED!!!!! MY BODY HURTS!!!!!!!! I WANT TO SLEEP BUT I ALSO HAVE SO MANY THINGS TO DO!!!!!!!!!! (ᴗ_ ᴗ��) but today my alarm woke me up at 7am but i stayed in bed till 7:40... i slept well too and had a crazy dream but i forgot what happened,,, i just rmbr it being crazy (good-ish?) to the point where i wanted to go back to sleep to finish it but ended up just forcing myself out of bed,, fufufuff~ and THEN i went to class :< which is actually a :> cause it was fun! i did some black and white designs for design class and the two hours passed by so fast,, after that i had a 3 hrs break and just walked home, rest for a bit, then went out to town to send my cv to this photo printing shop (fujifilm) for my work experience. they said they dont usually take work experience (˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ ) but it's ok cause i have two other places i can apply for work experience (it's mandatory in my course) i been going to fujifilm for years now, literally since it opened too, they know my name and email off by heart cause i always get my film develop there so i really hope they let me in!!!! it's only till christmas sniff.... BUT ANYWAYS, after i gave them that- i went to buy a sketchbook cause my lecturer said it would be a good idea just to have one where i can draw whatever and i bought one (1) pencil LOL.
then had a 2 hours class right after, but it was chill. nothing too serious and just worked on updating my cv and cover letter :3 after class, I WENT HOME AND ATE :D i dont usually like chicken but THIS CHICKEN WAS REALLY FUCKING GOOD MAN,,, i had it with rice and it was so filling. and while i was washing my dishes, my sisters arrived home and AFTER THEY ate,, we went to the park with my sisters friend and her baby. he's so big now sniff,, i rmbr when he was literally a few months old and tiny af. now he looks about 3 years old but hes only 1 years old. they're leaving to live in amsterdam in a month or two and it's so sad cause i only just got closer to her. it's ok tho cause amsterdam is close enough, and her parents still live here so she'll be in and out i think :)) we got gelato before going home and i got kinder bueno flavoured (THE LAST SCOOP TOO) it was so good. i dont usually eat ice cream out of the blue like that, i usually get a drink instead but since it was just a scoop i had some.
⸜(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡
what a long ass day fr,, i know im going to sleep good tonight too. i bought Notes of a Crocodile, The Analects of Confucius, and The Temple of the Golden Pavilion on my kobo (ereader). I do plan to buy the physical copies of all three, but not right now and it was just cheaper to buy it on the ereader.. I've read a few chapters of the temple of the golden pavilion before but never continued but my bestiana spoiled the ending and now i want to finish it bc the ending was a good ahh ending (imo). i can't wait to read before i sleep tonight,, reading so fun huhuhhu..... (⸝⸝⸝╸▵╺⸝⸝⸝)
these days, i've been really into my lil tech stuff again and i really want to homebrew a ps vita. i homebrewed my old nintendo 3ds but sold it for a [REDACTED] reason lol. i think a ps vita is cooler anyways. i also been really into micro journalling and coding. btw i cant code but i do like listening to ppl talk about coding and what they've coded. i wish i was smart enough to do allat.. i think i could if i really put my heart to it but right now i'm really liking my course. ill probably talk about it some more in the future but for now, i have written a fucking book and nobody reading allat!!! so im going to do my little me time before bed time and then go to sleep ٩(^ᗜ^ )و ´-
goodnight to me, and my precious bed, and my precious favourite girl in the world and and and- [GUNSHOTS]
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chenyann · 2 years ago
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Listen to the silence!!
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|°Rumor:Jamil works so hard but you seem to be able to drag him away from planning kalims 2022 Christmas party! |°Rumor warning:fluff, gn!reader,sfw,overused words(?), Grammer/spelling errors,this was written at 10pm last night....It's 7am the next day. |°Keys:1,527 |°Ads: I'm so sorry if this is ooc it was rushed and I really wanted to get this one done bc I found it so cute;;I love Jamil but I can never fully write his character because he is just so rahhhh.[Event list here!]
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Take a moment to imagine alone time with Jamil. Something this man hardly has, imagine how he would make a snarky comment but still lay beside you, imagine how close he is, how you can feel his hair tickle your fingers and cheek, how his breath is fanning your ear.
Jamil never has a moment's peace; no matter what time of the day he is always busy with something and today he was especially busy because kalim had asked jamil if he could hold a christmas party tomorrow. Jamil would have denied it, but he knew kalim would keep asking. With that said, you were very unsure if you should tell him to take a break. I mean– you did really want to and you knew he needed it. But then again you didn't want to disturb him and give him a sour attitude by mistake. Now look at him, with darkness under his eyes and his battery at five percent. He was hardly even there, he would space out and always was seen with a coffee or something that can give him energy- It was strange!!! Nobody ever saw Jamil like that before so it took the school by shock when they caught him dozing off in the middle of conversation.
“Hey Jamil…..” you were testing the waters to see if he was in a bad mood, Jamil who was sitting in the lounge was scribbling things down on lots of papers. Just standing there awkwardly you waited for him to answer, “Jamil?” No answer.. You took it upon yourself to just tap his shoulder instead of trying to talk to him. 
“Oh y/n, what are you doing here?” he asked, hardly taking his eyes off the paper. “I was wondering if you wanted to hang out. You seem like you need a break!” Jamil let out a long sigh, “I'm sorry y/n but I'm bus-” before he could finish his sentence kalim chimed in: “That's a great idea y/n!!” 
Jamil felt a headache coming when he heard kalim, “Kalim there is far too much to do for the party.” kalim sat there for a moment and began to think, “But you've been working too hard Jamil! How about I finish up for you!” The white haired boy was practically beaming at this point, meanwhile the black haired one tried to think of something to keep kalim away from his hard work. But he stopped when he realized it would end up useless. Kalim would always do as he pleased no matter what Jamil said, like when he tried to give Jamil a pet tiger on his birthday or the time Jamil told kalim he can't invite the music club to a asim family meeting. All those times ended up useless. “Fine.” Jamil said reluctantly, ``you were quite surprised when Jamil grabbed your hand and started taking you somewhere.
                                    [Jamil's room 1:56pm]
You just sat there.  Is he mad at me? You thought to yourself. Jamil hadn't spoken to you once this whole time, you felt pretty upset since you wanted to hang out but here he was sitting at the desk filling our more papers. You thought he was much kinder to you as-of-late and he would try to make conversation with you in the class or halls maybe even at  parties that you always seem to be invited to. But no, he still is the same distant Jamil viper. Or that's what you think: Jamil is a lair if he says he doesn't wanna talk to you, because he sure as hell does. (But he is rather busy at the moment so you have to wait) He actually likes talking to you, the way you say the most random yet enduring things makes his smile on the inside. He liked it when you were around him because it make him feel all happy on the inside even though you give him grey hairs from the dumb stuff you do. You can even go as far as to say he cares about you. Alot. But what was the strange feeling he felt now? It felt like an arrow just flew into him, it wasn't painful. No. It actually felt really nice. What was this feeling?
His feelings fell into shades of reds, violets, blues and yellows. But, he didn't want them– he tried to blow away from how he felt about you. But every time he blows them away like the winter wind it always seems to come back. Some called it puppy love, that kiddy hope for love that lots of children outgrew with time– but Jamil? No. Oh no, Jamil never got to experience that as a kid. So this was a foreign feeling to him. It made him wonder why a feeling danced its way to his heart when you were around and how he would subtly take care of your health or worry for you. What was that funny feeling when yall locked eyes? That same feeling returned for its encore when you had asked him a question, a phrase so simple yet so complex at the same time. “Do you wanna take a nap? With me that is.”
How was he meant to reply? Would he really stoop so low? Do you think he would fall for those glorious eyes you have? Yes. Yes he did, he fell for it all. You held such sincerity in your tone he didn't know what he wanted to do, for a moment he just looked at you with blank eyes. When he came to his senses he didn't say anything, all he did was walk over to the bed and look down at you. “.........” Silence filled the room as your thoughts began to race, “why is he just standing there????” ……….….… ………….“jamil?” You muttered, he just kept staring at you and it was creepy- well not exactly creepy just uncomfortable because it looked more like a glare. Finally he stopped staring and moved, in fact he only moved closer. You felt your face warm up with the sudden close proximity. 
Thump! 
      Next thing you know he was in your grasp, turns out Jamil moved too fast and fell, likely from the lack of sleep he was getting.  Now here you are, having Jamil in a holding position trying to keep him from leaving. “Y/N LET GO OF ME!?” Jamil screeched, “NO!? JAMIL YOU NEED TO REST!” you yelled back keeping the same energy, Jamil kept thrashing around and you kept holding him. There were some close calls when yall almost fell head first on the floor but you managed, Jamil though was fighting for his life like a rabid animal– yes after sometime he calmed down but it was still hard to make him stop moving! When he stopped moving you began your process of helping him relax.
Your hold felt like he had been graced by a warm patch of sun on a cold day. (Completely different from the choke hold ten minutes ago) It almost felt reassuring. How you whispered words of affirmation and praise in his ears, letting them rock around his head. He was praised alot so it normally wouldn't matter to him– he grew accustomed to not taking the words of others too seriously. But your words were different, your words were filled with thousands of different spices. With you, Jamil could be himself. Your words made ripples in his ocean of thoughts and caused a disturbance; it wasn't an unwanted disturbance– in fact it was welcomed with open arms! For a moment he wanted to praise you as well, he wanted to tell you how courageous you are, how much of a help you are. He wanted to explain how much he appreciates you.
Yet he stayed quiet. He didn't mutter a single word, letting the silence engulf yall two on the bed. He laid there completely devoted to relaxing, but how could he when he is so close to you, he can hear the soft thumps of your heart and your soft breathing. He continued to listen to your heart, his ears left no room for any other noise.
“Maybe just this once I can be selfish..” He mumbled just above a whisper, it took you by surprise– to hear him voice his idle thoughts like that; normally he would let them sit in the corners of his mind but just now he sat them upon the pedestal for all peering eyes to see. You hummed, letting the vibrations catch up to his ears. You saw how he turned his face away when it finally caught up to him. But you paid no mind, you took off his hair tie and slowly untied his braids. He slowly tried to raise his head up to give you a questioning look but before he could you started messaging his scalp. (You can't tell me he wouldn't like it bc he would)  He rested his head back on your torso as you started playing with his hair, rubbing his scalp and loosely rebraiding some strands, slowly but surely he fell asleep in your hold.
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poisonouswritings · 2 years ago
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Rant below:
(TLDR; One of my classes had a two part final exam, I did both parts and triple-checked they were submitted, I log on yesterday and it says one half wasn't even started and says I'm un-enrolled from the class. Today (20th) is the day the teacher is inputting final grades. I've emailed the teacher and am waiting for a response and am going to throw myself down a set of stairs.)
I am soooo fucking exhausted. I had this class, right? And I joined late. Within the allotted time (three weeks from the start of the semester) but late. And because I joined late, there were three assignments that I had missed. I did them and submitted them within the first week of being in the class. Emailed the teacher and she said she would add them in. Because of the way the categories were weighted, one singular 1.0 point assignment made up 30% of my total grade (because it was the only assignment in that category). And she just never fucking added it in. I emailed her at least five times about it. Nothing. She still hasn't added it in and we're technically done with the class now. That means that even though I was getting ≈90% on every single thing I was submitting, I was barely at a C because of that one category. And then she finally added something else to that category that was worth way more points, and my grade finally went from like a 72% to a 94% and it was like. Okay. Fine. You still didn't add the original three assignments that I repeatedly emailed you about, but fine. Whatever. I'll drop it.
Our final was online. Opened on Wednesday the 14th, closed Monday the 19th at 10PM. There were two parts. I finished them both on Wednesday at around 6 and 7 PM respectively. I triple-checked they were both submitted. I went to the completed assessments tab (this was in a separate site that we used specifically for tests, not the main grade site) and they both showed up but said the grades were unavailable until Monday the 19th after 10PM. Okay. Fine. I checked again on Friday the 16th and Sunday the 18th, thinking that maybe if everyone finished early the grades would release sooner. Didn't happen. Both assignments showed up as completed, but I couldn't see the grades. That's fine.
Yesterday (the 19th), I had a final in the morning/afternoon. My last final, specifically. And then I went to the airport to pick my sister up because she's coming to visit for Christmas. I get home at around 11:30 PM. I decide I'm gonna go check on my final grade because I'm curious as to what I got. I log onto the testing site and it says one half of the test wasn't even started.
Um. What the fuck.
I immediately try to go to the completed assessments tab where it fucking said I had finished them both on Wednesday, and I get a 'You Are No Longer Enrolled In This Course' message (meaning the course has been closed for access).
Um. What the fuck.
I try to go back onto my dashboard to where it says the test wasn't even started. I get the same not-enrolled message.
Um. What the fuck.
So at this point it's 11:49 PM and I'm emailing my teacher and on the verge of a panic attack because I have put soooo much fucking work into this stupid fucking class all semester. I did that fucking exam. But guess what? If this situation doesn't get fixed, and she just marks it as incomplete (just like with the first three fucking assignments), my grade goes from a 96% to a fucking 78% because of the way the columns are weighted.
I'm. Just. So fucking exhausted. I feel painfully burnt out. What's the point of trying if I'm just gonna get dicked over again and again? It's barely 7AM so I obviously haven't received a response yet. She said in an announcement earlier on Monday that she's finalizing grades today (the 20th). And I'm fucking terrified that she's just going to ignore my emails like she did at the beginning of the semester. I'm fully prepared to escalate this to the damn department heads if I have to, but I am just,,,, so. tired.
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spaceclefairy · 2 years ago
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Bringing Home the Rain, Ch. 13
Pairing: Joel/Original Female Character; Tommy/Maria
Summary: Joel doesn't talk about his feelings, and Lucy's just as bad. Tommy's about as frustrated as a brother can get. But Tommy knows one thing: if Joel's not gonna chase what's right in front of him, Tommy's just going to have to lead him to it.
Maybe a five-hundred mile trudge through the ice and snow surrounded by wild animals and clickers will help with that.
Author’s Note:  Clap your hands if Knife Dad deserves a little happiness.
It’s on Ao3! Drop a comment/kudos if you feel so inclined.
Ch. 1  |  Ch. 2  |  Ch. 3  |  Ch. 4  |  Ch. 5  |  Ch. 6  |  Ch. 7  |  Ch. 8  |  Ch. 9  |  Ch. 10  |  Ch. 11  |  Ch. 12
--- --- --- --- ---
Outbreak Day  
Lucy is not a morning person (or, in fact, really even an afternoon person). So, an eight-to-five job with the Center for Disease Control is not exactly her idea of a fun job. Nevertheless, it’s the job she chose and the job she’s good at, therefore, thanks to Atlanta traffic, Lucy must leave the tiny apartment she shares with Maria at 7AM to even come close to making it to work on time.
 Maria, similarly, has to leave at the asscrack of dawn to make it to her courthouse job on time. Therefore, the pair of them regularly have to engage in a sluggish dance of no-I-need-to-shower-first-today. There have been more than a few screaming matches over the years.
 As usual, Lucy is the first one of the pair to finish getting dressed because, as much of a morning person as Lucy is (which is to say, not at all), Maria is even less of a morning person. She drags herself to the front door, grabs her pack and thermos of coffee, and readies herself to make the trek over to the MARTA station so she can make it to work on time.
 Lucy calls out to Maria - as she does every day - to let her know she’s headed out for the day. “‘Ree, I’m going to work!
 "Hold on a second!"
 Lucy stops with her hand on the front door of their tiny shared apartment as Maria pokes her head around the door frame. Maria has been (very slowly) packing up her stuff to head out for the day, too, a half-eaten apple next to her and a thermos of coffee in hand.
 Lucy backs away from the front door. "What's up?"
 “Don’t take the train - there’s something weird going on out there.”
Something weird in Atlanta could mean anything, really. Gang threats, bomb threats, animals getting loose at the zoo - the list goes on.
 Lucy pauses. “What do you mean, something weird?”
 Maria hefts her bag over her shoulder and grabs her thermos and keys. “There’s a shit ton of cops outside.”
 “That’s not exactly out of the ordinary around here.”
 "No, but this is different," Maria says. She looks more stressed than usual. "There’s nothing on the news about why, and no one at the office will answer my calls. I’d rather just drive you to work.”
 “The CDC building is really out of the way for you. I don’t want you to be late for work.”
 Maria ushers Lucy outside with a wave of her hand, locking the door behind them. “I’d rather be late than let something happen to you.”
 Lucy hops in the passenger seat of Maria’s car and shuts the door behind her. Maria's car is older than the both of them, but well cared for, clean and functional. The radio fizzles and pops as she cranks the car, static cutting through the white noise of Atlanta traffic. They're parallel parked on the street, but traffic is so bad it takes Maria several minutes to ease out into the road.
 Maria huffs. “What the fuck is happening? Traffic is always bad, but this is worse than Christmas traffic.”
 Lucy shrugs. “Bomb threats maybe? Gang stuff?”
 "Probably more bomb threats. Can't do anything at the courthouse lately without them."
 Traffic lights change from red to green and back without a single car moving more than a couple of feet. Maria honks her horn, joining the cacophony of other cars laying on the horn. More than a few people have gotten out of their cars to yell at others on the street.
 Maria lays on the horn again as the traffic light makes another round of red-green-red. “What the fuck is going on? The light’s green!”
 “I’m sure the cops have got the roads blocked off if there are bomb threats,” Lucy comments.
 “You’d think someone at the police department would call me back and tell me what’s going on…”
 Lucy reaches to turn the radio on, hoping it will calm Maria’s nerves. Despite wanting music, Lucy knows the news is the better choice at the moment - maybe there’s something about why traffic is so heavy.
 The radio fizzles in and out as Lucy keeps twisting the tuning knob. She turns the radio off and back on, but is met with nothing more than the same fizzing static. “No signal? What the hell? This is Atlanta. I’ve never not had a signal here.”
 She twists the knob left and right until something resembling news bleeds through the static. “‘There we go…”
 …military has been authorized to respond to widespread attacks along with all law enforcement. At this time, no cause has been determined….  
 Maria smacks Lucy’s arm. “Lou, look up!”
 The man in the car in front of them falls out of the driver-side door, convulsing on the pavement in front of them. He’s frothing at the mouth, twitching and scratching at his throat thoughtlessly.
 Maria moves to get out of the car, but Lucy grabs her and yanks her back. “Do not get out of this car.”
 “We have to help-”
 “Look at him, Maria.”
 The man on the ground finally stops convulsing and, somehow in spite of the convulsions, rises to his feet. His skin had turned a yellow-ish gray, eyes bloodshot and feverish. He twitches, his neck turned at an odd angle. From his mouth, a wad of what appears to be yellowish vines drapes out, twitching and moving seemingly of their own volition. And then he bolts, twitching and stumbling, over to the car in front him.
 "What the fuck is he doing-"
 Lucy and Maria watch, stunned, as the man beats on the car window next to them, then yanks the passenger from the car, descends down on him, and bites. He pulls chunks of flesh away from bone and chews, mindless and sloppy. Blood drips from his chin as the passenger on the ground crawls along, screaming and bleeding, desperate to get away.
 The passenger squirms and squirms, punching and kicking and scratching, but there’s too much blood. The man descends again, ripping into the passenger’s neck, and finally, the passenger on the ground just stops. The man who bit him turns to look at Maria and Lucy, bolting over to them.
 Lucy slams her hand down on the door locks, checking the back passenger seat locks. “Drive, drive, drive!”
 Maria guns the engine, but there's nowhere to go as the man races towards their car. "Where am I gonna fucking go-"
 Lucy points. “Turn down that alley - it’ll take us two blocks over and we’ll be right at the CDC.”
 "There’s too many cars in the way!"
 Cars blocked the turn, and people lined the streets. The first man wasn't the only person acting strange. There were more than a few people climbing out of their cars, gasping for air or grabbing at someone in the next car over.
 “We’re not getting out of this - we’re gonna have to run-”
 “Are you insane? I’m not leaving this car!”
 “And wait for that psycho to bust the car windows and eat us for lunch, too? Come on, I have a badge to get into the CDC building. We can hunker down there until we figure out what’s going on!”
 Maria grasps the door handle, the original man having gotten distracted by easier prey - a man who’d gotten out of his car to help the downed passenger - and twists the lock. “Fuck, fuck, fuck… on three, we run.”
 They bail out of the car, sprinting down the side alleys. In the open air, outside of the deadened noise of the car, the sounds of screaming split the morning. Crying, begging, gunshots. Honking horns and the sounds of metal crunching and tires screaming. It escalates as they run, the gunshots getting more and more frequent, the screams getting louder.
 Lucy leads them down through the back parking deck of the building to the rear entrance, fumbling with her key card until the swipe pad blinks green. They burst through the door and are met with the barrel end of the security guard’s gun.
 Lucy starts, throwing her hands up in the air, and Maria follows suit. “What the hell, Mac? Put the gun down!”
 “Lucy - Jesus Christ, you scared me,” Mac said, but he didn’t lower his gun. “Who is this with you?”
 “My sister, Mac - she’s my sister! Put the fucking gun down, dude.”
 “Are you sick? Feeling weak? Nauseous?” Mac asked, the gun still trained on the two of them. “What have you had to eat today? Anything with gluten? Wheat?”
 “Nothing - coffee. Why the fuck does that matter?”
 “What about her?”
 Maria backs up a step. “An apple? Coffee? What the hell is going on?”
 Mac lowers his gun with a sigh, ushering the pair in before making sure the security door behind the girls is barricaded.
 “Get in here,” he says, swiping his card and keying in a code on the keypad. The key blinked green, then red, and stayed red from then on, as bright as vicious as a little light could be. “You’re lucky you made it here just in time. The building is on lockdown until we get the all clear. I’ll have to take you up to an observation room to make sure you’re clean.”
 Lucy stepped in line behind him when he motioned for them to follow. “What do you mean by clean?”
 “There are reports of widespread hysteria and mass attacks. Government thinks it might be something in the food - some kind of contamination from the flour and wheat products coming from overseas.”
 Lucy sighed. “We’re both gluten-sensitive and I’m vegan, so I’m pretty sure we’re in the clear.”
 “The hospitals are overrun, apparently. It’s bad. Everything is blocked off, but there’s no official news story yet.”
 Lucy glances over at Maria. “Good thing you took me to work this morning.”
 Maria nodded. “Good thing you work for the government.”
 “They’re not sure what the time frame for onset of symptoms is, but escalation is quick.”
 “We noticed,” Lucy replied. “We saw a guy have a seizure, wake up, and chew on another guy for lunch. Then we ran here.”
 Mac swiped them through another section of the building into an area with stark-white walls and people scurrying around in lab coats and clean suits. He pointed them down the hall. “All employees are being taken to a contamination room for observation. They’re letting families in, too, so your sister is allowed in.”
 Once Mac left them at the check-in point and was out of earshot, Maria nudged Lucy’s arm. “Good thing you told him I’m your sister.”
 “Something crazy like this going on - I figured it was safer. They won’t ask if you’re really my sister.”
 Maria watched as a woman in a white lab coat ushered another pair of employees through the hallway and into separate rooms. “I hope not.”
--- --- --- --- ---
October 2036 - Jackson, Wyoming  
 Ellie had finally been allowed to go on patrol with Lucy for the first time, and they were making the most of it. They were only supposed to be a short patrol - barely even half-day, but they were both excited.
 Ellie had talked nonstop most of the way, which was a far cry from the mood she’d been in since her party the week before. The questions had been coming nonstop.
 "So, that was Outbreak Day for you?” Ellie asked, trekking alongside Lucy. The girl was now several inches taller than Lucy - it seemed like she’d sprouted up out of nowhere in the past few months.
 "Yeah. Maria and I were under lockdown there for a couple of weeks," Lucy said. "I worked there, so at least I had something to do. 'Ree was stuck sitting around."
 "You were stuck there like that for weeks?"
 "Weeks. Honestly, at that point, we had nowhere else to go. Atlanta was on fire, the city was being raided. Our building got hit pretty hard,” Lucy replied, a little softer than she’d meant to. She and Maria both lost most of their personal effects in a fire that had taken out the whole city block. “FEDRA wasn’t FEDRA back then - we were under martial law by the military - but they had to keep the CDC on lockdown."
 "Why?"
 "Research. Try to figure out how to contain it quickly. We failed, obviously."
 “What about the Fireflies?”
 “The Firefly faction in Atlanta wasn’t a resistance group - not like Marlene’s faction in Boston. They were terrorists.”
 “I thought Atlanta was one of the research groups…”
 “Did Marlene tell you that?” Lucy snorted. She stopped upon catching Ellie’s dejected look. “Marlene did tell you that. Okay. Shit. Uh, the Atlanta faction didn’t start as bioterrorists - they were just resisting martial law at first. They convinced a lot of the workers at the CDC to join them. Said they were working on a cure, that they had resources. All a lie, of course. But FEDRA yanked our funding after a few years, so I guess that looked attractive to some of them who made it their life’s work.”
 “Did you join the Fireflies? Back then?”
 “No, not me. I worked for the government right up until FEDRA bombed the city.”
 “Why do the Fireflies keep showing up here, Lou?”
 “We're trying to figure that out.”
 After that, Ellie was silent. Lucy didn’t quite know how to follow up. The Fireflies had been such a sore subject for the girl for so long… And if Lucy was right, it was because Ellie already knew - or at least suspected - what Joel had done to get her out of that Firefly hospital.
 Either way, Joel and Lucy had collectively decided they needed to have a sit-down with Ellie. It would be easier that way - just get everything out in the open all at once. In fact, part of the reason Ellie had been allowed out on patrol with Lucy that day was so Lucy could get the ball rolling and gently begin to clue Ellie in. Or, at the very least, get the girl in a good mood.
 “You wouldn’t lie to me, right?” Ellie asked.
 Lucy had a feeling she knew where Ellie was going with this. “No, baby, I wouldn’t lie to you.”
 “Do you promise?”
 “I promise.”
 “Then what do you know about the Fireflies that you’re not telling me?”
 “I will make you a deal,” Lucy said. “I’m still figuring out a few things. I promise you, I will tell you everything I know about the Fireflies if you give me a little time. Okay?”
 Ellie was quiet for a long moment. She said, in that very teenager way, “Okay.”
 “Look, I’ll even tell you a secret to show you how much I trust you,” Lucy said, “but you have to promise not to tell anyone, not even Joel.”
 Ellie perked up at that. “I promise.”
 “I know who's sending the scouts to spy on us, and I think I know where he's at and what he wants."
 Ellie's eyes went wide. "You do?"
 "I don't know for certain, but I’m pretty sure I'm right."
 "Who is it?" Ellie asked, excitement rising in her voice. Ah, yeah, that was the right way to go about it. Ellie loves secrets, especially secrets she gets to keep from Joel.
 "If I’m right, it’s someone I knew a long time ago. He was good friends with Marlene. If he's still alive, then he's the one sending people to spy on Jackson."
 Ellie only knew Marlene, not any of Marlene’s friends. "Will you tell me when you find out?"
 “Yes.”
 Ellie got quiet, meandering along next to Lucy. Ellie sometimes asked Lucy what pre-Outbreak was like for her, and Lucy didn't mind telling her, but this was awfully bleak for such a beautiful morning.
 Finally, Ellie changed the subject. "I can’t believe Tommy let me go with you on patrol."
 “Honestly, me either,” Lucy replied, though patrol had been a set-up. “He probably thinks we’re gonna run off and go fishing.”
 “I mean…” Ellie shrugged and looked up at Lucy with puppy-dog eyes.
 “I’ll take you fishing another day, kid,” Lucy chuckled. “Gotta be responsible today.”
 “Bummer.”
 “Did you see Joel visibly clenching when we left?"
 “He must have checked my gun ten times,” Ellie groaned. "It's like he forgot we basically lived in the wilderness for a year."
 "He knows you can handle yourself. He just doesn't want you to have to," Lucy said. "And he's a worrier. It's a dad thing, I guess."
 "Wouldn't know. I never met my dad,” Ellie said, clearly not bothered by the fact she’d never met her dad. "Did you have a dad?"
 "Yeah. I tried to find out what happened to him years ago, but the raids were so bad in Atlanta, and they spread so fast… Everything from Atlanta to Miami was burnt to the ground,” Lucy replied. “So, I never found out.”
 Ellie, clearly just a little embarrassed now, looked at the ground and didn’t reply.
 Lucy wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "But hey, come on, on a happier note - it's a beautiful day and we get to be on patrol together. And next week, I get to start taking you down to the dam for guard training."
 "So, how did you swing that?"
 Lucy scratched the back of her head. "Uh…"
 "You didn't tell Tommy and Joel, did you, Lou?"
 "I'm going to,” Lucy huffed. "Look, sometimes it's better to ask forgiveness than permission. Besides, Maria signed off on it, so you're clear."
 "They're gonna lose it."
 "Probably…" Lucy agreed. "But, I'll talk to Joel about it tonight. You’re coming to dinner, right? It's gonna be a special dinner."
 Said special dinner was, of course, when Lucy and Joel were planning on giving Ellie the run-down about the Fireflies.
 "A special dinner?" Ellie asked. She looked Lucy up and down. "You're not pregnant, are you?"
 "Absolutely not," Lucy snorted. "Joel would freak."
 Ellie laughed. “Yeah, he would.”
 No need to tell Ellie that wasn’t an option for Lucy in the first place. The conversation that morning had been bleak enough already.
 “So, are you coming to dinner or what?”
 “No, um, I’m having a sleepover with Dina.”
 “Ah…” Lucy nodded sagely. “Are you doing anything fun at your sleepover?”
 Ellie’s cheeks burned pink. “It’s not… like that.”
 “I didn’t say it was like anything.”
 “Jesus, Lou-”
 Lucy rolled her eyes. “All I’m saying is that if you just tell her how you feel, you’ll feel better. Dina’s been a good friend to you. You can have an honest conversation with her.”
 “She’s dating Jesse!”
 “It’s just a conversation, Ellie. You don’t have to marry the girl,” Lucy said. “If you don’t tell her, it’s going to bother you until you do. Take it from me.”
 “I don’t even know if she...”
 “Likes girls?”
 “Yeah.”
 “It’s Dina, Ellie. She knows you like girls, right?”
 “Well, yeah...”
 “It probably won’t even be a surprise.”
 “Was it a surprise that Joel liked you back?”
 “This isn’t about me,” Lucy replied. She relented at Ellie’s glare. “Fine. And, actually, no, because Tommy kept telling me he did. I just never thought he’d do anything about it… Anyway, don’t make the same mistake I did. It’s going to bother you until you say something.”
 “Right.”
 “Look, if you can’t come to dinner tonight, how about Joel and I take you fishing this weekend?”
 Ellie nodded. “Okay.”
--- --- --- --- ---
October 2036 - Jackson, Wyoming  
 Joel had been on guard duty at the watchtower all day. It wasn’t his favorite job - not by a long shot. Most of the time, there was nothing to do. Sure, there may be a stranger passing through every now and then he’d have to go meet, maybe a few infected to pick off from the safety of the tower, but it was usually nothing more than sitting around and twiddling his thumbs. He took it seriously, as he did with every job he’d ever had, but it did leave him a lot of opportunity to get lost in his thoughts.
 After several long conversations, some including Tommy and Maria, he and Lucy had agreed to talk to Ellie together rather than separately. Tommy and Maria agreed to be there as well to add context where needed. As reluctant as Joel was to admit what he did to get Ellie out of the Firefly hospital, and as stubborn as Lucy still was about talking about any potential cure for the cordyceps infection, they could at least agree that a conversation needed to happen.
 As Lucy maintained, and Joel finally came around, Ellie deserved to know.
 Joel couldn’t anticipate what Ellie would say. She’d probably be angry, might not understand - but she’d already been through so much… He hoped she’d come around.
 While Joel was lost in his thoughts, still practicing what he was going to say that night, Tommy arrived at the watchtower. Tommy usually came around whenever he could if he wasn’t busy - his patrol detail must have finished early.
 Tommy plopped down in the chair next to Joel. “Bad news.”
 “Great,” Joel sighed. “What now?”
 “There’s a scout camp out past that crop of deadwoods where the old sewage leads into,” Tommy said, wrinkling his nose. “The camp looked pretty fresh, and it looks like they might have gone down into the sewage tunnel to see if they can find a way in.”
 “Jesus.” Joel couldn’t think of much worse than going down into those old tunnels. On the wrong day, when the breeze came from just the right direction, one could smell the remnants of the old sewage system. “At least it’s blocked off down there and they can’t get in.”
 “Right,” Tommy replied. “It’s a good place to flush them out if they’re down there.”
 Flush them out indeed.
 “Tomorrow then?”
 “Bright and early. John and Dave are posted down there in case they come crawling out during the night,” Tommy said. He tipped his chair back, rocking aimlessly on the heels of his boots. “I’m thinking we take Lucy with us on detail.”
 Joel grimaced.
 “She may know who they are, Joel.”
 Finally, Joel nodded. “I know.”
 “You want to tell her?”
 “Not particularly,” Joel replied. But, reluctantly, he agreed. “But I’ll tell her when I get home.”
 Sensing that his brother would hear no more, Tommy changed the subject. “Are we still talking to Ellie tonight?”
 “Far as I know, yeah.”
 “How do you think she’s going to take it?”
 “Uh…” Joel shrugged. “Not well, I imagine.”
 “No, suppose not.”
 They lapsed into silence until the next watch shift came in. Joel bid Tommy goodbye for the afternoon with the promise that they’d see each other again shortly.
 Joel returned home to find Lucy standing over the stove in their now-shared home, sweating in the heat. She’d offered to cook for the night since Joel had been at the watchtower all day despite it being Joel’s night to cook. She’d chosen to wear the dress he liked - the green one with the shoulder straps - and not for the first time, Joel remarked to himself how nice it was to come home to someone who cared about him.
 Joel leaned over her shoulder to kiss her cheek. “How was patrol?”
 “Good, no problems,” Lucy said, “but Ellie’s not coming tonight. She’s having a sleepover with Dina. We’re taking her fishing this weekend instead.”
 “Damn,” Joel said. He sat down at the kitchen table. “Been practicing what I’m gonna say all day.”
 “Well, it’ll give you more time to practice.”
 “I wanted to get it over with,” he observed. “Tommy and Maria are still coming tonight, right?”
 “Yeah, they should be here shortly,” Lucy said. Having been with Joel for the better part of two years at this point, she knew when his questions were pointed. “You know I know Tommy comes to hang out at the watchtower whenever you have guard duty, so whatever you’re      not    telling me that you’re afraid Tommy will mention, I suggest you just go ahead and tell me.”
 Lucy caught the grimace that passed over his face, just briefly, and smiled smugly out of Joel’s line of sight. Joel was a smart man, but Lucy had his number. It never failed to make her smile.
 Joel, reluctantly, said, “We found another Firefly scout camp.”
 “Fuck - where is this one?”
 “Out past that old outcrop of deadwood,” Joel replied. “Near the old sewage tunnel.”
 “Joel, that’s damn near inside the gate.”
 “Tommy left a couple guards down there to keep watch.” Joel, being Joel, remarked in his pointed way, “Tommy and I are going down there tomorrow to see if we can flush them out.”
 Lucy put her hands on her hips. “And I’m going with you.”
 Joel sighed a long, calculated sigh. “Okay.”
 She narrowed her eyes in return. Again, she was very much accustomed - damn near an expert - at picking apart Joel’s pointed questions and sighs. “...you already planned on taking me with you, didn’t you?”
 “Honestly, I was hoping you wouldn’t ask,” Joel admitted. “But yeah, I kind of already prepared for that.”
 “Crafty, crafty man,” Lucy said, tilting her head. “I came up with a pitch on the spot just then.”
 “No, by all means, make your pitch. Shame it should go to waste,” Joel said, grinning his sly little grin. “I’m sure you weren’t going to tell me you might eventually recognize one of the scouts if we find them. And I certainly wasn’t going to tell you Tommy and I agree with you.”
 “...well, now I’m not gonna give you the jug of moonshine I made special for you,” Lucy hummed. “It’s apple. Your favorite.”
 Joel leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. He replied, almost sweetly (it’s apple moonshine, after all), “I re-shoed Linnea for you this morning while y’all were gone.”
 Lucy rolled her eyes. “Well, if you wanted a blowjob, you could have just asked.”
 "That wasn't quite the point," Joel laughs at that, the corners of his hazel eyes crinkling. “But I’m not tellin’ you no…”
 She crossed the few steps over to the table where Joel sat and placed her hands on his knees, bending to meet him at eye level.
“Ask nicely and I might blow you right now before they get here.”
Joel’s eyes darkened, but he didn’t say anything. Lucy, being Lucy, loved when Joel was speechless.
And, of course, at that moment, a knock sounded from the front door. 
Lucy snickered and swatted his knee. “Bad luck, cowboy. Looks like you’ll have to wait."
Joel shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “You can’t keep doing that before we have company over.” 
“It’s fun to watch you squirm. Plus, that means you’ll kick Tommy out faster.” Lucy leaned down to kiss his cheek before shoving a glass mason jar into his hands. “You can have the moonshine, though. I’m sure you’ll need something to distract you from that massive boner you’ve got right now.”
“You’re awful sometimes.”
“Try saying that again after I suck your dick,” Lucy snickered again as she left to go answer the front door.
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now-we-say-c0ral · 11 months ago
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December 28, 2023
I'm still off sick until tomorrow because of this stomach bug. Been pooping less now but my stomach still hurts. What the fuck did I eat that upset my stomach so bad?
Ed went to work even though he wasn't 100%. I was nagging again but it feels like I'm talking to a tree. I just let him be and just told him to pack some medicine and his lunch as well.
I just played Pokemon the whole morning and made myself a high protein brunch-dinner around 12:30pm. Took a shower and went to the gym. I did chest, biceps, and abs today. It was a good session but my legs were a bit sore from yesterday's training. They're going to be screaming tomorrow when I'm hitting my legs again. I do legs twice a week now because Monty's legs inspired me to have cuts on my quads.
Went home and saw Ed covered in his warm poncho. That's cute. I reheated the mung beans and made some rice for his dinner. I won't be eating. I have to be more strict with myself because New Year will be the last time I'm going to be eating a lot of food. Fingers crossed.
Just playing Pokemon trying to fill the Pokedex and we're just watching JJK tonight. It's been a good day.
December 27, 2023
I was supposed to be working today but called in sick at 7am because of a 'stomach bug' and I'm not really feeling well. Ed wasn't feeling well too but he still insisted to go to work because that's just like him. I foresee that he will be back before 10am because he really didn't seem well sleeping last night. He came back drunk as fuck and he was running a fever, I think. It's the result of his relentless partying since the 23rd. Yes, I was nagging when he came back at 9:30am.
I went to the gym despite of my stomach bug and my stomach still hurts bad a lot. I did legs, abs, and shoulders. It was a good gym session for me. I also went to Morrisons to get some essentials for me and Ed because he's sick. I think it's Covid but we both tested and they came back negative.
I cooked mung bean soup for the sick boy and made him some Berocca to help him with his fever. He's still so warm. I told him to take a shower to help him.
I finished the Kitakami and Indigo Disk DLC last night and I've never been happier playing a DLC in Pokemon. It was so good! I love Carmine the most because she reminds me of me.
While I was in the grocery store, a thought came to me. It's so exhausting being a giver when you're in a relationship with a taker. Ed's not doing it on purpose. It's just how he is. That's him in his default. I'm exhausted and it took a lot of guts to finally say this because I've been trying to come up with explanations why I feel this way when I knew why from the start. I've changed, too. I'm less now. Maybe that's a good thing. I'm not going to be that tired anymore. I'm glad that I finally said it. It's so reaffirming. It's sad though that I have to keep myself from giving more of me to him but I'm happy because that means I get to have more of me for myself. I think it makes sense, right?
Kevin and I also agreed to meet for coffee on the 13th of Saturday. It's the third attempt after randomly seeing each other at the station to meet up for coffee but I think we'll see it through this time.
December 26, 2023
Finally! A long, well-deserved sleep after the physical stress that the 24-25th has given me. Those were happy days but I think ageing has made my mood sour. I think I grew up to be a Squidward.
I wanted to go to the gym but I saw online that they'll be reopening on the 27th. Seems like I can't burn the excess calories I've eaten the past few days. If it's not freezing cold here in the UK, it's fucking wet and windy. We can't choose a struggle here because we live with them all. Checking my bank account and I'm literally trying to process how I'm going to manage everything and it's not even January yet. I don't really know.
Ed went to Stevenage to attend their Filipino Christmas Party with his friends but I didn't want to attend mainly because my social battery has run out and I just want to be a potato in the bed gradually growing its roots.
I did nothing all day but I did record myself rapping Nicki Minaj's verse on Monster.
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viewstitch · 11 months ago
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It’s Day 357 of the Great Hill Humidity and Dew Point Differential Scarf 2023. The humidity was 76 percent, the dew point was 17, and the differential between the humidity and the dew point was 58 today. I used the Petal Pink color of Red Heart Super Saver yarn. I worked my stitches in the “(K6, P6); repeat” stitch pattern to show the differential between the humidity and the dew point was 59 at 7am. It was a sunny day Wessagusset, but it was cold all day. I wrapped presents all day, and continue late into the night. I hope to finish tonight so tomorrow will be a cleaning day before Christmas. Here’s hoping. Be safe out there.
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6isabella · 1 year ago
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16 November
5:32am
Woke up way too early. Spent a lot of time on Temu putting really helpful useful things in my basket and also a lot of things I don’t need. Going to go on a walk hopefully now, around 6am to 7am. Going to listen to Anne Frank. The vape withdrawals haven’t been so bad so far. I’m kind of okay with the psych ward experience. Being alone with my thoughts has felt easier since then. I’ve got a busy busy day ahead of me. I better get started.
7:04am
Finished my walk. 6,000 steps complete. Took some nice photos. Listened to Anne Frank. I love Anne Frank. She was so ahead of her time. We would’ve been such good friends, but she wouldn’t appreciate my lack of spine. Today I’m getting a 1 litre bottle for water. I left mine in Newcastle. I need to figure out what to get for Christmas… I’m excited! Now I’m going to get ready for Dubbo. Today I’m watching the new hunger games movie! I’m so so excited. Bye for now.
11:15am
Short summary
Had a cigarette before movie
Watched movie
Had a cigarette after movie
Went home
Frantically set up for appointment
Had appointment with Eliza the therapist
Got collars sort of ready for petties
Gave Otis an extreme bath
Ate dinner
Room messy
Too tired to explain. Will elaborate (maybe) tomorrow. So fucking tired right now. Goodnight.
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voyagerstypewriter · 2 years ago
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12/4 Sunday, December 4th, 2022.
It’s going to be a new year?? 2023? This shit really is different i remember being at home all alone on Christmas and New Years, “Here’s a ticket to do nothing” oh yes. I had a fun weekend though, and Rich has started to grow on me because more than I like to admit me and him have a lot in common yeah he may be goofy but life ain’t funny if you don’t have one. The crew from Canton was cool, its always to see some of the homies and reconnect as men and I feel like I have. The poison 2.0? I can confidently say I need to rest up on the whole no females, no relationship what am I doing when in reality I can do this when i want anytime. This weekend almost reassured me that if I wanted I could so when I chose not to I don’t need to think that I’m not enough I’m worried about my connections.
Milan, London, Germany, trying to find a good reason why I’m skipping my mom’s birthday vacation trip with our family… I said it best today though that these opportunities come and go and this may the one trip that changes things for me. “The Hot List” is still something on my mind. I am very excited and also super anxious its crazy to think all of what I built in New York is now behind and I’m staying in other countries. I still haven’t finished New York but these places that I will remember forever. The modeling is an incredible experience and to remember how much I wanted to be where I was last year. If I had to be honest, the biggest thing I’ve been chasing since leaving college is leaving behind whoever i was in the past and meeting all new people and allowing them to accept me for what I want now in life rather than what I was doing before and changed route. This trip realistically will allow me to do so as I’m not going to be going to castings every day I will be on stay and have to go explore, meet people, and find out what I like in life aside from my video games and sports because they will have different priorities.
I hope to continue to seek growth in life, my habits are the next focus in my life as I find what I have a tendency to do and what can save me time. If I have a habit that is harming my way of life then I can figure out how to make it convenient for me to do the right thing. An example right now for me is me playing video games. I know how long it takes for me to enjoy each game and now I factor that in when I could choose to be doing something else. Packing my bag for the gym, cleaning my room each night, out the cord by 11pm, I can continue to do these things while finding the best way to relax myself.
One thing I need to do is also acknowledge where I am missing some structure and character to my life. I’m really not set on what I’m going to do tomorrow morning, wake up go to equinox dumbo or go to the one where I can hoop I can do both. Gym before 12PM would be the best timeframe for me right and i can continue to go back in time until I’m back at 7AM to see what time I like the best.
Alright I want to watch Naruto before I sleep and I figured out what I’m doing tomorrow and that’s a start.
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caswatchesoveryou-artblog · 3 years ago
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happy one year anniversary of just saying it: I love you 💙💚
i finished this quick last night till 7am 🥱 so please ignore all the mistakes 😣 today almost feels like "destiel christmas" 🥰 let's celebrate this one of a kind love story..💙💚❤️❤️❤️🥺😍🥰😭
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let-me-luve-you · 4 years ago
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Separated Cherries
Tom Holland x Sister
Summary: The reader deals with anxiety and one form of the readers anxiety is separation anxiety. She really misses Tom so he flies her to Cleveland while he’s working on Cherry. He later admits how hard it was for him to worry about her and focus on the seriousness of the character.
Warnings: anxiety, separation anxiety, angst, protective Tom, talks of Cherry (nothing is mentioned specific i don’t think, but I do mention that it was hard for Tom to film it and how it deals with difficult topics)
A/N: I’m awful. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry for the late post but I hope you enjoy it!! This was for a special person and I hope they enjoy it! Also I mention a scene in Cherry but don’t go into detail but if you have watched the press tour, you may know what scene I’m talking about. Or if you’ve seen the movie, you may know what scene I’m talking about. I tried to avoid spoilers so I hope you like this story.
MASTERLIST      BUY ME A COFFEE
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The days leading up to Tom leaving, you didn’t leave his side. He didn’t mind though. He loved having you around. You grounded him and reminded of the normal life he left behind when he went to be The Tom Holland the world knows and loves.
Earlier this month, Tom took you with him to Utah for a convention. You had never gone to one before so Tom thought this would be a good time. Tom also was being a little selfish and wanted you there with him since he was still dealing with the news of Spider-Man leaving the MCU.
Now he’s about to leave for Cleveland to film Cherry. A movie Tom knew was going to be a challenge for him. The Russo’s fought for him to be in this movie. They wanted Tom in this role more than anybody. They even got a job for Harry. You had asked Tom, when he first learned of the filming dates, if you could go with him. Since Tom knew the contents of the movie and how dark it was, he didn’t want you around that, so he said no.
Now, it’s the night before he’s leaving. You are curled up on his bed watching him pack his bag. “Don’t forget your blue light glasses.” You said.
“Already have them packed in my carry-on with my laptop and chargers.” He said to you with a smile. “Thank you though. I do forget them all the time.” You laughed.
You turned serious, “I’m going to miss you. I know you said I couldn’t go, but I still wish I could go with you.” Tom sighed.
“I know. I’m going to miss you too, but this film is just going to be dealing with a lot of serious issues and I don’t want you to have to see me like that.” He said, honestly.
“I know. Can I still call you though?” You asked sheepishly.
“Always.” He said before turning to his dresser to get socks and underwear. “So, what are your plans for the next few months?”
“I plan on helping mum. She apparently has a lot of shoots. Probably taste test all of Sam’s food.” You laughed.
“I’m so jealous. I have yet to find something I don’t like of Sam’s.” Tom said.
“He is a great cook.” Tom agreed. “Paddy apparently has a show he’s going to be on, so I’ll help him with that in any way I can. And Dad is working on a new book, so whatever he needs me to do, I’ll do.”
“You really are great, you know that?” Tom asked as he paused his packing to come sit next to you. He wrapped you in a hug. “Are you going to do anything for you?” You shrugged. “Do me a favor? Do something for you. Learn to do more for you. You help all of those around you, but you rarely do things for you. Draw more or hide away and read. Go out to a party or go do something with your friends. Remember to take care of you. Promise me, you’ll try to do that.”
“Promise.” You said. He squeezed you tighter in the hug and gave you a kiss on your head before getting up to finish his packing.
The rest of the night was uneventful. Tom finished packing and put his bags by the front door. You both got comfy on his bed and watched a movie. You were the first to fall asleep and first to wake up the next day. Tom’s and Harry’s flight wasn’t until 10 am and it was currently 630. You decided to make them a good breakfast so they would be fine until the flight gave out their lunch.
“What are you doing?” You heard a tired voice. You looked over your shoulder to see Tom walking up to sit at the counter. You smiled at him and fixed him a cup of tea.
“I’m making you and Harry breakfast.” You said cheerfully. You walked back over to the stove and finished making the eggwhite omelet. Tom was on a strict diet so you made something he could eat, but also something that he liked. You put it on a plate and set it in front of him.
“You didn’t have to do this.” Tom said. “But thank you. This looks delicious.” “What looks delicious?” Harry asked as he sat next to Tom. “Oooh. I want one.”
“It’s coming right up.” You said as you set a tea in front of him and turned back to making his omelette.
“Thank you Y/N.” Harry said, taking a sip of his freshly made tea. “Can I hire you to be my personal assistant?” You all laughed. “When we get home, I’ll treat you to dinner via Sam’s cooking.”
“Sounds good to me. I’m holding you to it.” You said. “I’m really going to miss you guys.”
“Just a few months and then we will be home for Christmas.” Tom said standing up to put his plate in the sink.
“I know. Still sucks. I hate when you leave.” You opened up. You had been holding it in. You felt bad for dropping it on him right before he leaves, but it needed to be said. “It always just feels different around here. I don’t know how to describe it, but it doesn’t feel like we are complete.”
“I know it’s not ideal to have two brothers that are constantly traveling for work. That we aren’t here for family dinners, but we are a phone call or text away. Reach out and we will try to answer as quickly as possible.” Tom said looking into your eyes. You could see that he meant them.”
“Ignore me. I’m just in my feels this morning. I’ll be okay.” You whispered. You wrapped Tom in a hug. “I’m proud of you, you know? It’s so great to see you out there doing what you love and seeing the people’s lives that you touch.”
“Thank you y/n/n. I love you.” Tom said kissing your forehead.
“Love you too.” You squeezed him tighter before pulling away and wrapping Harry in a hug. “Love you too Hairball.”
Harry scoffed at the nickname you gave him when you were both extremely young and you were mad at him. “Don’t call me that…” He paused before hugging you back. “Love you too.”
“Now you better get going before you’re late.” You said. “I also packed you small snack bags and put them in your carry ons.”
“You’re the best.” Tom said as he walked to put his shoes on. “Thank you y/n/n.” Harry said doing the same.
You watched them grab their bags and walk out of the house with one last smile. You sighed and went back to your room to take a nap. Already missing your brothers, you decided to turn on Spider-Man Homecoming.
It is now mid-October and you were missing Tom and Harry more than anything. You tried to hangout with Sam and Paddy more to try to not feel the sadness of missing your other two brothers. Paddy didn’t want to hangout with you. He was too busy hanging out with his friends and playing football. Sam was always at the restaurant or in the kitchen at your parents house. You would stay with him and watch him cook, but it wasn’t the same.
Your sleep schedule was messed up due to the fact you were staying up late watching Netflix. Looking over at the clock, it read 3 am. Pulling your phone from your bedside table, you pulled up Tom’s contact and decided to FaceTime him. It only rang for a couple of seconds before he answered.
“Is everything okay?” Tom asked worriedly. You could tell he was laying in bed.
“Yeah. I just wanted to talk to you.” You answered honestly.
“It’s 3 am where you are! Why are you not asleep?” His eyes widened as he realized how late it was for you.
“I can’t. My schedules messed up. I’m fine. Did I wake you?” You asked, scared of the answer.
“No. I was just watching some TV before I went to bed. I have a 7am call time.” He said and you breathed a sigh of relief for not waking him.
“How was filming today?” You said looking at his tired eyes.
“It was good. We did a hard scene today, but it went really well. We have another hard, long day again tomorrow.” Tom rubbed the tired out of his eyes. He was just about to fall asleep when called.
“I’m sorry you’ve had some hard days.” You said sincerely.
“Thanks but it’s okay. Thankfully Harry’s here. He’s really helping me.” Tom sighed.
“I’d help you if I was there. I know it’s hard, but I’m proud of you.” You said with your eyes tearing up.
“Are you doing okay?” Tom asked concern noticing the change of tone in your voice. “Mum said you’ve been at the house a lot.”
“I’m doing okay. I went and got my nails done today with Chandra.” You said showing Tom the Marvel based nails. With Tom only being a year older than you, he got you into Marvel when you were younger. Spider-Man was always your favorite and when Tom got the role, you celebrated just as much or even more than he did.
“I like them. They’re pretty.” Tom said with a small smile. “How are you holding up though with me and Harry being gone? I haven’t asked in a while.”
You sighed and looked away from Tom. You didn’t want him to know how much you missed him, but you missed your best friend. “I’m good. Been hanging out with friends more and I help Sam when he’s at home. Mum, Dad, and I have had movie nights. It’s been good.”
“Are you sure you’re okay?” He asked, still concerned. You felt a tear you had been fighting fall down your cheek. You looked away from the phone. “Y/N/N. Look at me.”
Shaking your head, “I’m fine Tom. I just miss my best friend.”
“I’m sorry. I wish there was something I could do.” He said.
“I’ll be okay.” You whispered.
“How about this…” Tom said. “Let me fly you out to visit. We are about to do some of the easier stuff and you can come stay with us while the scenes aren’t so intense.”
“You don’t have to do that. I’m just being weird.” You said not wanting for him to be pressured into inviting you.
“Separation anxiety isn’t you being weird. It’s an actual thing.” He said sincerely. He cared about you. You didn’t know you had this issue until Tom got the role of Spider-Man and left for Atlanta. Your mum noticed you clingy to them more or your other brothers. When Tom arrived home you stuck to him like glue. Your mum decided to take you to a doctor to see if there was anything to do for you. You learned the anxiety medicine didn’t help you and talking to a therapist only went so far. All you wanted, was to be with your whole family.
“I’ll get Harry to schedule you a flight. Pack warm clothes and at least two weeks worth.” He said.
“No, Tom, it’s okay. I’ll be okay.” You fought back.
“I’m serious. Come stay with us. Harry will get your flight.” He kept fighting back.
“If you're sure.” You said softly. Tom almost didn’t hear it.
“I’m sure. I miss you too. Plus having you here may help me.” Tom said, laying back down on his pillow. You could tell he was tired, but he was staying awake for you.
“I appreciate it, T.” You spoke honestly. “I really do miss you. I love you.”
“Love you too y/n/n.” He whispered while fighting to keep his eyes open.
“Get some sleep. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
“Night.” Tom said before hanging up. You smiled knowing you were finally going to get to see your brother again very soon. You laid back on your bed and finally felt the exhaustion from staying up late. You could worry about what you were going to pack tomorrow.
When Tom told Harry to schedule you a flight out, Harry accidentally scheduled it too early. Tom still had some hard scenes to film. When you landed in America, he didn’t want you to come to set, but he didn’t want to leave you at home either.
Harry showed you where you could go and couldn’t. You basically only went to Tom’s trailer, the bathroom, the food tent, and Tom’s chair. Today, Tom begged you not to come because he knew the day was full of hard things. He knew what the last scene was going to be filmed and he didn’t want you to see that.
You insisted you could handle it. You didn’t want to be alone. You wanted to spend time with your brother. Tom finally gave in after you promised you would stay in his trailer during that final scene.
Throughout the day, you stayed close to Tom. When he wasn’t filming or on set, you were right beside him. He tried to be understanding of how you were feeling, but he really needed to step away from everything he’s been feeling for filming.
“How’s your sandwich?” Tom asked at dinner. It had been a long day and there was only one more thing to film before there were four days off.
“It’s good. How’s your salad?” You asked, pointing at his plate.
“It’s good.” He said nonchalantly. You knew he was craving more food. You had asked Harry to go get him a cheeseburger with fries. You looked up and noticed him carrying a bag from Five Guys.
You smiled and Tom looked over his shoulder. “Thanks for going to get that Harry.” You said as Harry sat next to you. You grabbed the bag and pulled out the burger and fries. “Eat up Tom. I know you’re hungry for more.”
“I can’t you guys.” Tom said in a defeated tone. “I’m still on this diet. I can’t. I can’t do that to everyone that’s working on this film.”
You sighed, “Tom, you have had salads everyday for two weeks. You can have one burger. You need more food.” Tom looked at you and then looked at Harry.
“I mean, I did go get it and I agree with Y/N. You do need to eat more and it will be okay. One cheeseburger won’t hurt.” Harry said. Finally Tom agreed to eating the food Harry brought. “Y/n/n are you going to set tonight?”
“No. I promised Tom I wouldn’t be there.” You answered honestly. Harry looked over at Tom shocked. Harry figured Tom would want you there since it’s such a hard scene. Maybe have someone other than him that’s familiar.
“You can come work with me.” Harry told you.
Tom looked up at him shocked. “I don’t want her to see this. It’ll be hard enough to have her watching it in the movie.”
“I think it’ll be good for her to be there. It’s a hard scene and I won’t be able to be there between takes.” Harry said. Harry was doing a new role tonight and needed to focus on that.
“It’s okay Harry. I can wait in the trailer. I brought my book.” You said with a smile. Trying to help Tom out so he doesn’t feel like he’s being teamed up on. Tom smiled at you gratefully. Harry turned to Tom and started to whisper something to him. You watched Tom’s demeanor change. He rolled his eyes before turning back to you.
“You can come. Bring your book and a blanket. You can sit in my chair.” Tom said finally giving into Harry.
“It’s okay. I don’t mind waiting in the trailer. Promise.” You told Tom. Tom finished eating his food before standing up to go to his trailer with you and Harry following. He walked in and grabbed your book off of the counter and grabbed your blanket. “Let’s go.” Tom said as he walked out the door towards the set.
“Tom. I’m not going.” You said. Harry shook his head and started to push you towards set. “I promised I wouldn’t go.”
“Come on y/n/n. I promise it’s okay. I don’t count this as a broken promise. I want you there.” Tom said with a sigh. You decided not to keep fighting with him about it. You ran to catch up with him and grabbed the blanket and book from him. “Thank you.” He whispered. “This is going to be a difficult scene to watch, so I’m sorry for what you have to see.”
“It’s okay Tom. I’m a big girl. I can handle it.” You said with a small smile.
Later that night, Tom was in the makeup trailer getting his makeup removed. You were sitting in his trailer with Harry waiting to go home. You tried to hold in your tears. You hated seeing Tom like that.
“Are you okay?” Harry asked.
“Great.” You said forcing a smile.
Harry looked at you skeptically and then nodded. He pulled out his phone and sent the video he got to Tom. You were exhausted and just wanted to go to sleep. You decided to lay down and rest your eyes until Tom got back. You were just about to fall into a deep sleep when you heard Tom walk in.
“Should I send this to mum?” Tom asked with a laugh.
“Do it.” Harry laughed. “But first, let’s go home. I think someone needs a bed.”
Tom looked over at your sleeping body. He smiled at you. Harry was right. Having you there helped him. This was probably the hardest scene he was going to have to film in the whole movie.
“Go get the car. I’ll bring her out.” Tom said as he started putting your stuff in your backpack. He quickly put his and your backpacks over his shoulder before he moved over towards you. He picked you up bridal style and made sure the blanket didn’t fall off. “Shhh. It’s just me. We’re going home.” He said when you started to wake.
Pulling up to the house, Tom decided to shake you awake this time. You woke and looked around confused before you unbuckled and walked into the house. You crashed on the couch and watched Tom set your backpack in the chair.
“How are you doing? Today was hard.” You said.
Tom picked your feet up and sat down before he placed your feet in his lap. He laid his head back. “Today sucked. I’m not going to be able to sleep tonight.” Tom said with a sigh.
“Want to talk about it?” You asked.
“No. There isn’t much to talk about. I just need to get out of that mental mindset.” Tom said honestly. “How are you? That had to be hard to watch.”
You finally let a tear slip. “I’m okay. I just didn’t like seeing you like that.”
“I’m sorry. You weren’t supposed to see the hard parts.” He said, pulling you into a hug.
“It’s okay. I promise. It’s scary to think people actually go through that. I don’t want to see you or anyone go through this.” You whispered.
“Hopefully this movie brings light to these situations and starts a conversation.” Tom said, giving you a kiss on the head before releasing you. “Now no more talks of this. Let’s try to forget about today and watch a movie instead.”
Tom started up a comedy to try and bring the mood up. Harry joined you after changing into his pajamas. Mid way through the movie, you fell asleep. Tom looked over at you. He knew you being here helped you, but in his head he was worried about you and everything you were seeing. It was hard to focus on you and filming.
It’s now been a year since Tom finished filming Cherry. Tom invited you to come with him to film Spider-Man No Way Home. He went three months without seeing you after the pandemic due to his heavy film schedule for Uncharted. He knew those were hard days for you since you went from spending all day with him to not even seeing him.
Now Tom was doing press for Cherry since it is due to come out in a few weeks. He set up in the living room. Harry had got a ring light to make the videos look better. You were supposed to be out while Tom was doing his few interviews for the day, but you got back early. He still had one more to go. You decided to sit in your room so you wouldn’t interrupt.
Even with your door closed, you could hear Tom talking to the interviewer. What you heard made your heart stop.
“Tom, your brother and sister were with you when filming Cherry, right?” they asked.
“They were. Harry helped on the film. Even had a small role. And my sister, Y/N, came out to visit and stayed the rest of filming.” Tom answered.
“Did having them there help you?”
“It did. This was a role I had to go to a dark place. Having them there really helped ground me and bring me back from that dark place. They definitely had my back during these times. I was actually on a strict diet throughout filming. Y/N actually made Harry go get me a cheeseburger on her first night there because she knew that I needed a little more substance. I had two weeks worth of salads and she knew I needed a little more. On nights of hard filming, we would all sit in the living room and watch a comedy because it all took us a while to calm down from the day. So having them there was very important to me.”
“That's amazing to hear.” they said. “It’s always good to have family there for you. You said there were hard filming nights. Even though it was hard, which was your favorite?”
“There was one scene that was extremely hard to film. The entire day was hard. Sadly, it was my sister’s first day there. I didn’t want her to see those scenes, but it was good to have her there. The day was a couple of scenes that dealt with something with Emily. The whole day was based on that situation. It was a variety of emotions. I had to be scared, angry, sad.” Tom said. “I actually sent my mum a video from that and she was not happy. She called me immediately to tell me she didn’t appreciate it.” He laughed.
“Can you give us a hint of what that was?” they asked.
“I don’t want to give too much away, but it’s when I’m in the truck. You’ll know when you see it because it involves Emily and it’s very hard to watch.” Tom said.
“You say it’s hard to watch and that was your sister’s first day, how did she handle it? And how did Harry handle it?” you heard them ask. They were starting to dig deeper.
“Harry was the one that filmed that scene so I could send it to my mum.” Tom laughed. He knew Nikki would give him heck for it later, but he knew it was only because she cared. “My sister actually hated watching that scene. She’ll hate me for saying this, but she cried. It scared her because she said it felt real and she didn’t want to see anyone like that.”
“That makes sense. Both of you are close in age, how are the two of yours relationship? It has to be good for you to allow her to visit during such a hard movie.”
“We are very close. She’s my best friend. I can say this because she openly talks about it and helps raise money for charities, but she has anxiety and one thing that really affects her is her separation anxiety. It was great to have her on set because she brought me back to myself, helped me get out of that dark mindset. But at times, I felt I was more worried about her and making sure she was okay. Mixing the stress of taking care of her and the stress of playing the role was hard to take on.”
You listened and felt tears build up. You made Tom’s job harder. You felt a tear fall down your face and you held back a sob so Tom couldn’t hear. You immediately went to the closest and grabbed your suitcase. You started packing your clothes. Once you were finished you set it near the door and grabbed your laptop so you could find a plane ticket. Tom walked in as you were searching.
“Why is your suitcase out?” He asked, confused.
“I’m going home.” You said shortly.
“Why?” He questioned.
“I’m just a burden to you. I don’t want you to have to worry about me while you focus on filming. I just like being in the same city as you. I didn’t mean to add stress to you.” You said as a tear slipped.
Tom sighed, “You heard?” He asked. You nodded. “Did you hear everything?”
“I didn’t need to. I heard enough.” You said honestly.
“So you didn’t hear what I said after that?” He asked. You shook your head. “I told them that it was worth it. That I would go through 20 times the stress if it meant you were happy and safe. That your anxiety wasn’t holding you back. That I used some of the stress from caring about you to help with the film. You remember the emotional scene in Morocco.” You once again shook your head. “I used the stress to make that scene. I know that sounds bad, but I think that really helped me hit the emotion I needed.”
“That was a beautiful scene. From what I saw, it’s one of my favorites for you. It’s heartbreaking, but you made the viewers feel what you were feeling. That was because of me?” Tom nodded his head.
“I’m sorry for admitting to it, but just know, if we redid all of the filming, I would have you there from day 1. I love having you around. I have all this noise around me that is trying to change me and having you here helps keep me the kid from Kingston.” Tom said. “Please don’t leave. I really do want you here.”
You looked around at your room. You then focused on your suitcase. You thought about it. “I’ll stay.” Tom smiled when you looked at him. “Only if you promise me something.”
“Anything.” He agreed.
“If I am stressing you out, in the way, or affecting your work, you tell me. I’ll stay here for a few days or I’ll go home. I don’t want to burden you with my problems.”
“Your anxiety isn't a problem. It’s something you battle and I want to help you fight.” Tom interfered.
“I know. And you will. But if it affects you, it isn’t fighting, it’s a problem. So please promise me that you’ll tell me.” You begged.
“I promise. But know you are never a burden to me. You are my best friend and I love you. I want you here. Trust me on that.” Tom said as he pulled you into a hug. “Now, are you ready to go to dinner? We have an early day on set tomorrow.”
You nodded. You knew that your anxiety was a battle but you didn’t want to bother Tom. You knew he was telling the truth when he said you weren’t a burden. You knew the thought would come back, but you had to tell yourself that it was your anxiety. Now working on your separation anxiety would be worked on at a later date.
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awanderingdeal · 4 years ago
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Simply having a wonderful Christmas time [Part 2]
Merry Christmas to all those folks who celebrate today! This one is dedicated to those of you of who are perhaps not spending Christmas in the way that you would like this year. I hope this brings you a little bit of Joy. Please note that this fic is filled with happy Christmas people so if that is going to make you feel worse then please avoid. 
Here’s your Coops instalment! Not the best thing I have ever written and it turned out to be a more Sirius and Jules interacting. Never the less, I hope you enjoy. 
Rating: T
CW: Christmas and Food talk. Very minor mention of past bad Christmas’ in the penultimate paragraph.
And again, this universe belongs to @lumosinlove and I feel incredibly privileged to be able to play in it. Thank you!
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It wasn’t unusual for Sirius to wake up at stupid hours of the morning and apparently his insomnia made no exception for Christmas day. He rolled over to check his phone, 04:56. He wondered if he should be concerned that the only thought that his brain supplied was; hey, that’s not too bad. Sometimes if he closed his eyes he could pry out another few hours of sleep. He could tell that today was not one of the days. 
Accepting defeat, Sirius carefully teased himself from Remus' arms. He’d mastered the art of doing so without waking his fiancé up. Fiancé. It was a new thing and it still felt unreal. Remus Lupin actually wanted to spend the rest of his life with him. 
Sirius figured that he would make a coffee and find something to watch on the TV until it was a reasonable hour to wake Remus up. His plans were quickly scuppered. As he started to walk down the corridor, a head peaked out from one of the doors.
“Sirius?” Julian whispered, his voice filled with excitement. 
Sirius felt a smile spread across his face, “Awake already, Jules? The sun hasn’t even risen yet. What if Santa hasn’t been?” 
Julian scoffed. “Sirrrrius,” he whined. “I’m nine years old. I do not believe in Santa.”
“I know, I know,” Sirius laughed. “But it’s part of the fun isn’t it? Pretending.”
Julian grumbled, apparently too cool for all that now. “What are you doing?”
“I was going to make coffee and watch a movie. Want to join?” Sirius replied. He loved spending time with Remus’ brother. It felt like practise for when he and Remus had kids. It felt like redemption for all the things he did wrong with Regulus. It was a chance to relive the few things he had done right. And Julian was incredibly easy to bribe for stories of young Remus. 
“Can we make waffles!?” Julian asked, bouncing on the balls of his feet. 
Sirius lifted a finger to his lips, “Not so loud, Jules.”
The boy whispered an apology, but he didn’t seem very sorry. 
“It’s okay, it’s Christmas. You're allowed to be excited. We can make waffles but only if you can tell me how. I’m a disaster in the kitchen,” Sirius answered the earlier question. 
Julian nodded his head quickly, “I know how! I can show you.”
Sirius figured reprimanding Julian’s volume again would be futile and opted to usher him down the corridor to the kitchen. He closed the door behind them in the hopes that it would provide a buffer between the excited nine year old and the sleeping adults.
“Aprons first, I think. Hope won’t be impressed if we get batter all over our pyjamas.” Sirius said, grabbing two aprons from the hook on the wall. 
Julian and he wore matching nightwear. In fact, they all did - Sirius, Julian, Remus, Hope and Lyall. It was a Lupin family tradition. Christmas Eve was board games and a brand new set of pyjamas. Sirius had had to excuse himself to the bathroom when Hope had handed him his pair. When he had returned, Lyall had looked at Sirius’ red eyes, taken his hands and said, “When are you going to realise that you are family now?”
When Sirius turned back around, he found Julian had climbed on to the counter. “Jules! What are you doing?” he panicked. This boy was going to be the death of him. 
“I do it all the time,” Julian argued. “The recipe that mama always uses is in here,” he added, his fingers curled around a thick tome. He carefully opened it to the contents page, tracing down the page until he found what he was looking for, “Page 98.” he said, holding the book out for Sirius to grab. 
“Okay, okay, just get down please,” Sirius took the book and turned it to the correct page. Perfect Every Time Homemade Waffles. The page was littered with comments and annotations, mostly in Hope’s messy scrawl. What Sirius liked the most though was that he could see the development of Remus on the page. From his childish chick scratch to the loopy cursive that Sirius was so familiar with. 
The recipe wasn't too difficult and the two of them managed to get the waffles made without too much of a disaster. 
"Jeez," Remus said from the doorway, making Sirius jump as he poured the batter into the waffle maker. 
"Re!" Julian squealed, scrambling down from his seat at the counter. 
Sirius had to give Remus credit for the fact that he didn't even flinch when Julian wrapped his flour covered arms around him. 
"Merry Christmas, Jules," Remus chuckled. "What is going on here then?" 
Sirius leaned against the counter, his smile broad as he watched Remus and Julian interact. They looked exactly the same, standing there in their matching pyjamas. They wore the same expressions of concentration as Julian explained how they were making waffles and listing off the toppings they could have. 
"Hey, Jules. Do you want to be the first to taste?" Sirius asked when the waffle maker sounded. 
"Yes! And Remus has to try too." Julian said eagerly, suddenly by Sirius's side.
Sirius caught Remus' eye and saw the same look of happiness that he knew was in his own. "Of course Remus has to try."
Soon, the waffles had been tasted and approved. They cooked up several more, piling them on to a large plate. Just as they were finishing up, Hope and Lyall appeared.
"Sleeping in until 7am on Christmas Morning. We'll keep you around Sirius." Hope greeted. "I'll even forgive the state of my kitchen."
Sirius wore a guilty expression as he looked around. Somehow, they had used almost every bowl in the kitchen, there was egg residue all over the counter tops and flour handprints on everything. "Sorry," he apologised.
"Merry Christmas, my darlings," Hope kissed Remus, then Julian and finally Sirius on the cheek. She stopped in front of him, "Don't apologise, dear. You are always welcome to make a mess in this kitchen."
“Right! Let’s get this feast onto the table,” Lyall clapped his hands together and started to grab the array of toppings that Sirius and Julian had decided upon. 
Sirius managed to find Remus amongst the chaos. He pressed a gentle kiss against his lips and sighed a happy, “Merry Christmas, sweetheart.” 
“Merry Christmas, baby,” Remus said back. 
Christmas with his parents had been nothing short of a nightmare. Christmas with the Dumais had taught him what it was supposed to be like. Still despite the fact that he loved Dumo, Celeste and all the kids, he’d always felt as if he was invading somehow. 
It was early, but Sirius could already tell that here with Remus and his family - Sirius’ family too now - it was going to be different. He belonged here. He thought of the rings newly settled on his and Remus’ fingers. If Sirius had his way, he’d spend a lifetime's worth of Christmas’ here.
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archerdaryl · 4 years ago
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Peppermint Sugar.
You’ve been tasked with decorating the Christmas cookies while Carol is out on a hunt. It would have gone just fine if the archer hadn’t shown up.  
Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader Tags: more cute christmas vibes, sfw, fluffy and fun but still a little slow burn Word Count: 2.5k  Notes: This one-shot follows on from London in Your Eyes! I’m thinking about turning it into a little collection of Christmas fics that all link together. As always I would love to hear your thoughts. ♥
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You’d been at Carol’s house for barely ten minutes and you were already overwhelmed.
The air was thick and sweet like molasses, a pleasant surprise that was almost enough to soften the visual overload that was waiting for you in the kitchen. There were trays upon trays of cookies sitting on almost every counter space you could see. You had happily agreed to help decorate while she went out on a run with Ezekial and his knights, but good God.
There were at least a hundred cookies there. And they all needed expertly icing.
You approached the kitchen island slowly, eyebrows knitted together as you cursed under your breath. You can’t have been the only person she asked. Especially considering you weren’t exactly artistically inclined. Sure, a snowman was simple and you could probably figure out how to ice a Christmas tree adequately enough, but a couple of the shapes you couldn’t even identify.
“She’s lost her fucking mind.” The words escaped you in a mumble, followed by a long exhale.
Looking back you weren’t sure why you agreed to this in the first place. Maybe it was the assumption you wouldn’t be stuck here alone at 7am or that it would only be a few cookies you could hide at the bottom of the pile. You couldn’t have been more wrong, but you were at least relieved that you didn’t bother to change out of your yoga pants for the occasion considering you were going to be standing there decorating for hours.
Eventually you accepted that simply staring at the endless trays of cookies wasn’t actually going to do anything and you moved towards the stove to boil some water for coffee. While you waited for it to bubble, you organised the trays according to cookie shape and decided to start on what you could only assume were snowflakes.
How could you possibly mess those up? All you needed was white icing. If by some miracle Carol had got her hands on some food colouring, maybe you could be real fancy and mix a little blue in too.
You continued to wipe down the counters, dusting off remnants of flour before placing the first tray in front of you. You soon found a set of instructions left behind by Carol and you would be lying if you didn’t say you were relieved. You followed them, grabbing everything you needed and mixing up some sort of concoction that resembled a very basic icing.
Carol had to have chosen you for a reason. You hoped she had more faith in you than you did in yourself.
She had to, because you were already bored and you had barely begun.
And then the door swung open, almost making you jump.
“Oh my god, my very own knight in shining armour.”
Daryl Dixon stopped in his tracks and stared at you in confusion.
“Wha’?”
“I could settle for scrap metal.” You grumbled.
He narrowed his eyes before hesitantly moving his way through the house, eventually disappearing into the basement with Dog trailing along behind him. You mumbled a rather sarcastic goodbye before grabbing a ziplock bag and carefully spooning the icing into the bottom right corner, following Carol’s instructions as closely as possible.
“Thought you were huntin’ today.” Daryl shouted as he climbed back up the stairs.
“I was supposed to be. Carol wanted me to do… well, this.” You gestured to the mountain of cookies behind you and tried to hide your disdain. Dog happily padded towards you and demanded neck scratches by pushing his snout against your legs. Naturally, you obliged.
“On yer’ own?”
His crystalline gaze traced your form as he leaned onto the opposite side of the kitchen island. You were in an old hoodie, hardly form fitting but the dark red hue complimented your eyes, and there was a dusting of icing sugar across your cheek. He smiled ever so slightly, but said nothing.
“Unless you’re offering to keep me company, yeah, it looks like it.”
The pair of you hadn’t spent much time together since the Christmas fair. Keeping food stocks up was more important than ever with the snow being as heavy as it was, and the fact The King insisted on an extravagant Christmas celebration wasn’t helping anyone’s work load. Keeping busy kept you both from thinking about that stolen moment of innocent intimacy, though Daryl still found himself staring at you just a little bit longer with his fists clenched every time you crossed paths.
He was chasing the sensation of your hand in his without even knowing it.
“Ain’t got much else t’ do,” He lied, shrugging and leaning further onto the countertop with his forearms, “Watchin’ you fuck up might be fun.”
You didn’t bother glaring at him, your hands went straight for the icing sugar, picking it up in a pinch and flicking it right into his face before turning to find some scissors. You heard him splutter and blow hard, as if that alone could erase your act of vengeance.
“Don’ start somethin’ you can’t finish girl.”
You snorted and returned to your original position at the kitchen island, your grin widening after seeing the mess you made of him.
“I think you look great.” You insisted, “As ruggedly handsome as always.”
Daryl’s lips thinned in faux annoyance, though his eyes betrayed him. He was unable to come up with a retort of his own. He was stuck on two words in particular.
Ruggedly handsome.
He knew you were being sarcastic, you had a habit of that, but it still made him feel a little embarrassed. If not for the icing sugar speckled across his face, you likely would have noticed him blush a little.
“Handsome huh?”
Daryl had never been one to concern himself too much with the way he looked. He could never afford to and there certainly wasn’t any point anymore with the world in the state it was. However, in that moment he realised that when it came to you, he felt a sense of insecurity previously unknown to him.
“Oh yeah. I’m super into the whole dandruff thing.” You teased further, gesturing to the sugar speckled in his hair.
He rolled his eyes and pushed himself up off the island counter, “You talk too much.”
You had thrown him off on purpose. You had no choice. You couldn’t stand there and lie to him to protect yourself from the feelings you constantly tried to bury. Daryl Dixon was many things but ugly was not a word that ever came to mind. Yet, you couldn’t look him in the eye and tell him he looked like home either.
“C’mon. Carol will kill me if I don’t get something done.”
Daryl wasn’t sure what exactly it was he was supposed to be doing, but he was perfectly happy to be there even with the nerves causing havoc in his stomach. Anyone else would have considered them butterflies, but he wasn’t exactly a teenager dealing with a high school crush.
He met you behind the island and towered over you at your side. You forced yourself to concentrate on the task at hand, continuing to spoon icing into the ziploc bag. As he watched your hands at work, he leant down onto folded forearms and chewed the inside of his bottom lip absentmindedly
How did they look even softer than before?
He supposed it was because you were inside where it was warm, nuzzled within that oversized hoodie of yours. Was the rest of you as soft as your hands? He lost himself for a moment wondering what it would be like to fall asleep against your chest, your heartbeats perfectly in sync.
What the fuck was he thinking?
Quickly clearing his throat, he took his index finger and scooped up a blob of icing before you could steal it away with your spoon. He savoured the sweetness as he sucked it off his finger and then looked up at you with a mischievous glint in his eyes.
This was the most time they had spent together in days and he wasn’t about to ruin it by getting caught up in shit that didn't, no, couldn’t matter.
“Don’ start somethin’ you can’t finish girl.”
You met his gaze, eyes briefly drifting to his sugar sweet lips before you allowed a smirk to tug at the corners of your own.
“Don’t start something you can’t finish, Dixon.”
“Oh yeah?” He replied, cocking a brow before going in for a second scoop of icing.
Before you could even try to swat him away, Daryl had gotten his hands on the bowl and darted out of reach. Though his mischief may have been a distraction from his wandering thoughts, you were none the wiser. To you, this was one of those rare moments where he let his guard down enough to act a fool without wanting to beat himself up about it. You couldn’t be pissed even if you wanted to.
Grabbing the bag of powdered sugar, you immediately rushed after him, eager to make an even bigger mess than you already had. You followed him into the lounge where he had collapsed onto the couch, making himself comfortable and continuing to scoop out sticky white icing with his fingers.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” You whined, unable to keep an amused grin from tugging at the corners of your mouth, “Don’t think I won’t ruin this couch.”
Daryl looked up at you and allowed a snort of amusement to escape him. He didn’t doubt you for a minute, but he didn’t care about decorating no cookies and he knew you didn’t either so it wasn’t like he felt particularly guilty about the matter.
You stood your ground, your hand venturing into the bag of powdered sugar. Daryl watched you carefully and weighed up his choices, which didn’t take long at all because he soon found himself leaning forward to grab your forearm, pulling you down onto the couch with him in a poor attempt to keep you from attacking again.
What he didn’t consider was the bag of sugar doing a somersault out of your hands and creating  an even bigger mess anyway.
“Ah, shit!” He groused.
You landed awkwardly on him, having to adjust yourself so that you were flat on your back while he was laying on his side next to you with his arm bent to prop up his head. You quickly found yourselves coughing and having to wave your arms as you tried to dissipate the cloud of sugar, which mostly landed in a little hill on the rug but had still managed to leave heavy traces all over you.
“This,” You gestured to your hoodie and the mess around you, “- is on you.”
“Fuck that, I weren’t the one chasing me with sugar.”
After a futile attempt of wiping down your stomach with your hands, you turned your head to look at Daryl with a frown. You didn’t realise how close you were to each other until you met his eyes, which almost made you trip up on your words. You didn’t remember them being that blue.
“You’d really leave me to fend for myself like that?” You pouted.
Daryl opened his mouth to speak but the words got stuck in the back of his throat. You were so close. Too close. He could smell the sweetness on your skin, paired with peppermint which he could only assume was your toothpaste or some sort of lip balm.
“Carol won’t get mad at her pookie.”
He reached for the pillow by his legs but didn’t follow through on the threat as you quickly grabbed his arm and pulled it back towards you.
“I’m kidding!” You practically shrieked, his arm resting over your stomach with your fingers still wrapped around it to keep him from going for the pillow again, “Well, actually…”
“Stop.”
“It’s true and you know it. Please don’t leave me with this.”
Daryl went a little stiff. He wanted to pull away. He could feel the warmth of your body against his, could see each individual eyelash, and, fuck, those fingers of yours were wrapped around his arm. He was almost afraid to breathe. He didn’t want to take up more space than he already had.
You had spent many sleepless nights at each other’s sides in the past, either in temporary shelter while on a run or for comfort when things got bad. You had not, however, been this wrapped up in one another. Not in the slightest. He only had to put his head down for you to take him into your arms, and the thought of that alone was enough to make his heart skip a beat.
Once again, something had shifted and those uncharted waters were only getting deeper.
“Ya’ know, Dog can be pretty bad sometimes.”
“Yeah?”
Your eyes were locked and the words spilled from each of your lips slowly. Your grip on his forearm softened but you made no effort to let him go. In that moment it seemed as if you only saw each other and that the wall you insisted on keeping up was starting to crumble. It was only a matter of time before one of you rebuilt it, but right then, right in that moment, you could have laid there forever.
You wanted to know what he was thinking, if his thoughts were as scrambled as yours. You felt safe at Daryl's side, as if nothing could ever hurt you again, and you found yourself wanting him to pull you in closer.
God, he was already so close. One of you only had to lean in.
“Yeah. Carol don’t gotta know.”
“But the cookies…”
“Can’t ice no cookies without icin’.”
You couldn’t argue with that.
Daryl wet his bottom lip with his tongue and he could have sworn your eyes lowered to his mouth for just a second. He wanted to be put out of his misery. He felt like a damn school girl losing his head over someone he couldn’t have. You hadn’t approached this - whatever this is - for a reason but he wasn’t feeling very reasonable anymore.
Did your mouth taste as sweet as his? Would the peppermint make his lips tingle?
All he had to do was lean in.
Then, the unmistakable sound of the front door being opened echoed throughout the house. You both froze and confusion turned to horror when Carol eventually called out to you, claiming the weather had taken a turn for the worst.
You sat up on your elbows, eyebrows knitted together in worry whilst Daryl went completely silent, both annoyed and embarrassed that Carol had trespassed in her own home. You were mortified, there wasn’t a damn thing to show for your time there other than icing sugar everywhere, but you were also a little relieved - not because you didn’t want to be pinned in place next to him, but because you were finally able to take a full breath.
“Quick.” Daryl muttered, “Out the back.”
“But -”
Daryl didn’t give you a chance to argue. He quickly but carefully climbed up off of the couch and grabbed your hand without hesitation, squeezing it tight and pulling you along towards the back of the house where you could both escape.
You squeezed back, a childish grin growing across your sugar dusted face as your hand fit perfectly into his once more.
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gxccistyless · 4 years ago
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Fine Line: The Divorce Series - part two.
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In case you missed part one you can find it here. Feedback always appreciated in any form. Feel free to message me if you have any questions!! 
Trigger warnings for this include; mentions of death, drug and alcohol abuse. 
It’s ten passed twelve when Eliza opens her eyes for the first time, she hadn’t slept a good nights sleep since Fallon’s diagnosis but last night she didn’t wake not once.They had her funeral yesterday, she doesn’t remember much, she thinks this is probably partially why she was able to sleep so well, knowing that Fallon was finally resting at her forever home. Harry helped to organise the funeral and had been more available to both her and their other two children in the lead up to it and insisted in paying for it in full. But yesterday was too much for him, he left somewhere between the wake and the kids’ bed time and Eliza hadn’t heard from him since.  Harry woke up in his apartment for the first time in weeks, he’d be living at Eliza’s in the spare room from the time when things got to be too much for Eliza to handle on her own. He missed his bed and the peace and quiet, but he’d never allow himself to say those words out loud. Right in between losing her and laying her to rest, they celebrated her birthday. Gemma thought it would be a good idea to acknowledge the day instead of pushing it to the side, Harry just kind of wanted to push through and try and get through the day, but Eliza liked the idea of being able to blow out a candle for Fallon and so to appease his ex-wife’s needs and support her through her grief, Harry bit his tongue And they did just that, celebrated her. 
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elizadoherty 4 years ago you made me a mama sweet angel baby Fallon. I miss you, thanks for changing my life 🕊 Liked by harrystyles, niallhoran and 12,378,346 others,
 The funeral came around quicker than he had anticipated, it kind of crept up on him. After today things would go back to the way they were before Fallon got sick snd Harry wasn’t sure if he was ready for that. He wasn’t ready to be away from Koa and Lennon, or even Eliza for that matter. Everyone was so wrapped up in supporting Eliza on the day, they had forgot that Harry had lost a child too. So distracted by Eliza, no one noticed Harry when he slipped out in the middle of her wake, no one but Eliza.
There was no communication between the two in the weeks that followed, he locked himself in the studio with only a select few people and she was trying to get back to somewhat of a normal routine with the twins. He was making good progress with an album, it wasn’t as upbeat as previous albums had been but it just reflected what he was going through and how he was feeling. With no communication and his lack of interest in their other two children Eliza goes ahead and books a court date to finalise their divorce. Harry is leaving the studio when he gets words of the court date being set, he heads straight to the bar.  Harry is on his sixth drink when he finally gets a hold of Eliza. I miss you he tells her We just lost — we just — how can you even be thinking about finalising our divorce. She cries and that’s when he knows he’s fucked up. Eliza don’t cry, I’m sorry, I’m such a fuck up, it should have been me, not her... Eliza knows she should hang up the phone, call Gemma let her deal with him and go back to bed. Instead she asks Harry for his location, calls a sitter and by the time she heads to the bar its almost 10pm. 
Eliza finds Harry in the corner booth, away from prying eyes and away from windows with his back toward the rest of the people in the pub. By now he’s lost count of how many drinks he’s consumed. She orders herself a scotch on the rocks. The bartender looks between her and Harry and wonders what they must be going through to have lead them here tonight. They sit in silence mostly, Harry throwing back three drinks in the time it tasked Eliza to finish the one she ordered herself when she first got here. The bartender draws a line in the sand and cuts Harry off, he pays for his long bar tab remembering to ask the bartender to include Elizas scotch on the rocks and then he goes to leave. 
Harry makes it all the way to his car before realising he cannot find his keys. When he reaches the bar door she’s standing out front her arms crossed over her chest,p. You didn’t think I’d let you drive home in your state did you?  My children have already buried their sister this year, I’m not about to let them bury their father too. The words Eliza said to drunk Harry would play on sober minded Harry in the weeks to come. She half carries him to her car and takes him home with her. For the first time since they split, he sleeps in the same bed as her it’s only so I know if you stop breathing and to make sure you don’t choke on your own vomit. Eliza watches Harry breathe for the rest of the night, much like she watched Fallon take breaths in and out until she took her last, the only difference here is that Harry never stops breathing. Somewhere between 4am and 7am she doses off and Harry slips out of her sheets and out her back door before she’s awake. Eliza canceled their court date again, realising that perhaps Harry needed time to grieve before they started to go down this path.
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harrystyles ALBUM . IS. COMPLETE, Coming to you soon, happy holidays. All the love, H xx Liked by annetwist, gemmastyles and 20,368,289 others. 
Harry finished writing his album just before Christmas, it was literally the fastest album he’s ever been able to write. After all this time and experience, he knew the people he needed in his space to get the job done. A lot of the songs were sad, and Eliza knew that some songs would be about her and she fully expected some songs to be about Fallon, so when he turned up at her place to show her the demo she was surprised to find no songs about their angel daughter. Eliza, that’s sick that you’d think I’d cash in on — no why would I — I can’t believe you would think that. He was angry, didn’t see she was coming from a good place and not trying to attack him. She didn’t think it would be a bad thing if he had written songs about Fallon, she was growing concerned about his abilities to deal with the loss of their daughter... he couldn’t even say her name.  He was trying to be more consciences to spend more time with Koa and Lennon. With the album complete it was only a matter of time before his management would undoubtedly have him on the road and all over the globe. Truthfully he was dreading it. He spent most afternoons putting the children to bed before bedding back to his house. He noticed things about her that were different in the Fallon aftermath. She was lonely at night, and when Koa and Lennon were out with him of an afternoon she had not so much to do. She had already organised the bookshelf, and the kitchen. Harry knew what the perfect Christmas gift would be to keep her busy. 
Whilst she had redecorated the lounge and her bedroom. Fallon’s room remained untouched, the door closed and the room just the way their almost four year old had left it the day she left for the hospital and never come home. Sometimes when he would finish putting the twins to bed and when Eliza was sleeping on the couch, he would sneak into Fallon’s room and sob. Being in her room was the only time he allowed himself to feel anything.
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elizadoherty Happy holidays from the Doherty-Styles household, wrangling two and half year old twins into a photo is hard work and this mama couldn’t get it done. Please enjoy a photo of our delicious cookie “nomies” that are absolutely not store bought. 😝🎅🏻🎄🤶🏻 Liked by harrystyles, annetwist and 2,637,367 others.
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harrystyles ELIZA X OLIVE. Merry Christmas.  Liked by elizadoherty, olivedogherty and 18,573,663 others,
Harry’s album came out the week of Christmas. With the new year there would be lots of changes coming for both him, Eliza and their two children. He would be off on tour, first to the states then, back home for a UK stint, followed by the rest of Europe, then to South America wrapping up with Australia, New Zealand and a few dates across Asia. He wouldn’t be home for more than two days in the next nine months. This bothered Eliza. Partly because she wanted him to be home so they could finalise the divorce, partly because she wouldn’t have his help with the twins and mostly because he had already lost one child, had he not noticed the importance of having quality time with his children.  She had already been annoyed by the fact that he had bought a dog into her home and gifted it to her for Christmas, she didn’t have time for a dog.. she would barely have time for herself and the two kids he was leaving behind to go on tour, and he though a doh would be a good idea?
Her thoughts all come to a head in the middle of an argument on New Years Eve. We need to finalise the divorce, we both deserve to move on. He didn’t want to move on, he liked being able to come by see her, and the kids and still be able to know she was legally still his wife. You don’t care about me and the kids, you’re not even going to see them for the next nine months, don’t tell me you care. He was mad, not because she was right but because he wanted to see them but didn’t know how to ask her to join him on tour with them. I never wanted to divorce you. You’re the one who filed for divorce Eliza. It’s Eliza’s turn to be mad. Well there was no hope for our marriage, we hadn’t had sex in months, you were sleeping on the couch, what the fuck kind of marriage is that. It wasn’t a healthy argument for the tel of them to be having, especially with the twins in the next room. I was a drug addict Eliza, I was also an alcoholic, I couldn’t really walk up the stairs, that’s why I slept on the couch not because I didn’t love you. He had stormed out, the following day he had booked in with his lawyers to come back the last week of February for their court date and two days after that he was back on tour.
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harrystyles USA thank you for being the perfect start to this tour, you were all so beautiful! I’ll be back soon. All the love, H xx. Liked by annetwist, gemmastyles and 27,627,855 others. 
January rolled by faster than she would like to admit. Harry was back in London briefly to see the twins, Anne picked them up and took them to him as per his request. His birthday was tomorrow, Eliza offered for him to keep them for the weekend whilst he was in town, but he had other plans and declined her offer. She’s trying to give you time with your children. Anne nagged him, but her words fell on deaf ears. He had plans to drink his way through his birthday and not be able to recall any of it.  He woke in the morning to a voicemail from her. Harry, happy — well i know it’s not happy really — but happy birthday. I’m sorry about the divorce papers, I was... reaaaaalllyyy dumb. Anyway, see ya. She had been drinking, she could never hold her liquor. He remembers back to a time pre marriage and pre children when she would go out and have a few too many cocktails and call him from the bar, he remembers driving to fetch her, pulling over on the side of the road because his driving would be too much for her stomach to handle. He thinks about the way he used to hold her when she was too tired to walk and then the way he’d hold her in bed as her breath would steady and she’d finally succumb to the effects of the alcohol and sleep. God he loved her. 
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elizadoherty HBD to my #1 (And only) bb daddy, @harrystyles, you’re a great dad, friend and I’m so glad I get to raise my babies with you. Here’s a throwback to when we were younger and when you had less wrinkles, old man.  Liked by harrystyles, annetwist and 18,257,268 others.  He made a mental note to return her the favour of nice words on social media when her birthday would roll around come summer. They were younger and happier in that photo. He wouldn’t wish his kids away, but he does wish he could go back to being that happy, young and carefree guy in the photo. 
After his birthday, things continued to go downhill for the two of them and their co-parenting endeavour. It started when he was photographed leaving a nightclub with a random girl on his arm the night of his birthday and things escalated when a week before their court date she had been photographed with someone new. This was the first time since the two of them had started dating all those years ago that they had been photographed with someone else.
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TMZ 
Harry Styles ex-wife, Eliza Doherty, spotted out with new mystery beau shopping over the weekend.
It was the comments left the photo that sent Eliza into a rage. “Where are her kids?” “Spending all of Harry’s alimony I guess” that’s all the end of their marriage was to the public? Just about money? Never mind the emotional turmoil either of them had gone through, the sleepless nights the days where she wouldn’t know if he would make it home. The public didn’t understand, and never would, what it wad to be like Eliza Styles.  On top of the public ridicule, Harry of course had to get his two cents worth in. I don’t want you bringing random guys around the twins. It was a harmless comment and something she would surely say to him if she didn’t have manners or any kind of belief that he would be responsible with who he introduced their children to. Focus on yourself, Harry. And less on who I’m bringing home..
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TMZ
reports of Harry Styles and ex-wife, Eliza Doherty, heading into court today to finalise their divorce after almost a year snd a half. He wore a black shirt and a cross earring for the occasion. 
Harry was trending on twitter and the photo and article from TMZ were attached to every tweet. Most people agreed he didn’t look himself. Everyone agreed it was inappropriate to take the photo and then post it to the masses but here it was for everyone to see. Eliza shook her head and put her phone away, soon enough she’d be in the same room as him for the first time since New Year’s Eve. 
 She had never been more scared to see him, hadn’t heard from him personally for the entire first leg of his tour, which even when they were having problems was odd. Perhaps he was still angry,  she had moved passed the anger stage and into the sad stage pretty quickly, it had been like this throughout their entire relationship. She would get over things quickly whilst he would hold onto things for days and days at one time. Harry knew based off of her voicemail that she had been ready to move passed the argument on New Year’s Eve, and he was almost on the same page as her and then they argued about partners and children and things had again been sour since. 
As soon as the time drew closer she began to feel like she couldn’t breathe. Like she might collapse at any second and never wake up again, like someone had taken all the air out of her lungs and out of this building. She used to enjoy the way her heart would skip a beat and the way her lungs would lose all the air when he entered her orbit, but now the feeling made her sick to her stomach. For the first time in a long time she couldn’t stand the thought of being in the same room as him. 
Part of him didn’t want to be here. This was partially to do with the fact that last night he had drank his body weight in alcohol, was very hungover and couldn’t think straight, but it was mostly to do with the fact that he couldn’t stand to see her cry and knew there was a good chance with the way they left things off that he might be the reason for her tears. 
He reeked of vodka and scotch and tequila and definitely weed, at least that’s all the things that Eliza could smell as he sat across from her. He was using again, or drinking again at the very least. It made her sad, he had worked so hard to get to a good place. Perhaps this was his way of coping, his way of dealing with Fallon dying. His way of forgetting about his problems. It wasn’t healthy, she’d make a note to talk to Gemma and Anne when she got back to the kids later in the afternoon.
He looked as if he hadn’t slept at all since the last time she saw him some five weeks ago now — which would make sense because she hadn’t slept properly in that long either. His shirt was creased and it was a mess, he looked unkempt which was a rare sight. Mismatched socks, untucked shirt, the pants he was wearing just as creased as his shirt was. His hair was longer than usual— he was letting it grow again... was this even any of her business anymore? — It probably wasn’t but she still examined him from head to toe, He’s wearing his shades inside, what an asshole she thinks. He was almost unrecognisable. He was most definitely no longer her Harry. She didn’t care make eye contact with him, and he extended the same courtesy not that he had much of s choice in the matter.  Mr Styles is offering Ms Doherty 50% of all his assets, as of this time that part has not changed.  Ms. Doherty would be happy to only 25%, your honour. She feels it’s adequate enough to provide for the children, she has a job and doesn’t require 50%. Mr Styles insists in the 50%, even 25% of it were to go into a fund for the children. 
Her lawyer looks to her for approval, even though she really doesn’t need Harry’s money, she doesn’t want to argue with him.
Mr Styles would like joint custody of their two children, Koa Everett Styles and Lennon River Styles. Your honour, Mrs Doherty requests that the father of her children submits to drug and alcohol tests and has supervised visitations until he can get himself — uh well... clean.  The judge rules in her favour, Harry has to pass three tests in a row for both drugs and alcohol before he can come anywhere near the twins. The rest esd pretty straight forward and not much different to what they had already signed on, she got the house and would receive child support on top of the 50% of the money they made from the time they first got married. Harry doesn’t see his children  till two days before their third birthdays, almost three months after the court hearing. It had taken him three months but this time he swore to keep clean.
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elizadoherty happy three my miracle babes, there are no words 🥺  Liked by gemmastyles, annetwist and 4,472,378 others. 
A month after the twins’ birthday it’s Eliza who changes the agreement for supervision required to him being allowed to do visits at their house. Both the twins and Harry would be much more comfortable and if would give her more of a chance to observe him with them before she lets them stay with him overnight. He’s the one who suggests they go to therapy. He tells her it might help, and that he’s willing to try anything so long as she is too.  The first session back in therapy goes well, they haven’t done one together since just after the twins were born. They mostly discuss how to co-parent better and how to communicate with each other, the therapist warns to discuss Fallon and Harry practically has a panic attack at the mention of her name. When he instantly gets up and walks out on the session it’s just you and the therapist and 20 minutes left on the timer. I don’t think he’s ready to talk about her yet. It’s a sensitive topic for him. It hasn’t quite been a year yet since she passed. He won’t even talk about her with me and that was out daughter.  When Eliza gets home, Harry is on her doorstep. He’s sober, but crying and hyperventilating. She sits next to him and just hugs him not really knowing what to do. Eliza prays that her boyfriend, Andrew, doesn’t come over today. Her prayers are answered Eliza and Harry are left on their own. He cries for a long period of time before the head inside her house, Eliza is silently grateful that Anne offered to take the kids to Holmes Chapel for the week. Where did we go wrong? We should have been better and communicating. I was depressed when I couldn’t tour straight away and then you let me go and honestly this is going to sound fucking terrible but I didn’t want to come home.  So many confessions spill from his lips in a short space of time. Then Eliza starts. I just wanted you to be okay, you were struggling, I know you were depressed. I keep thinking about it, I don’t remember the last time we kissed or had sex, maybe it was before the twins were even born, we should have made more time. When she stops he’s not crying anymore he’s just staring at her with his eyebrows furrowed and then he does the unimaginable he kisses her. Not just a regular peck, his hands on the back of her head and her hands are on his chest and for just a moment they’re back in 2019 and they’re newly engaged and their wold is perfect. And then he pulls away, apologises and leaves and they are back to being divorced, estranged people who happen to share two children together. 
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wintersportism · 3 years ago
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23/12/2021 - 4HT countdown productivity challenge day 4/8
only a very short, very late update today because it was stressful. i didn't even have time to take pictures and i didn't exactly get anything done for my thesis but a lot of other stuff happened and since i wrote two whole pages yesterday, i felt like it was okay
today i
woke up at 7am to be the nicest and best friend ever and proofread my friend's bachelor thesis which he had to hand in today. it took over two hours because his grammar and spelling is horrible and we had to go through all 49 pages to correct everything.
finished the gifts for both secret santas
did secret santa at work and afterwards with my friends!
worked from 2:30pm to 8pm
my plan for tomorrow
be kinda chill cuz it's christmas but i'd still like to get a little bit done
maybe the introduction to the javelin chapter and see how far i'll come
or something small like the methods part or the general introduction
watch a christmas movie and spend a nice afternoon with my family!
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