#i finally gave in and ended up hyperfocusing

[immarainbowpatooie]

i love adhd time blindness :)

[brbarou]

Can you tell us about your journey as a creative? I know you showed us some of your old art a couple months ago, and I'm sort of curious about that in a more general sense! I suppose to put it more specifically a question I would ask is how did you arrive at the style you have now that I could only really describe as "squishy" like if I gave one of your drawings a hug they would squoomsh

sure! under cut cause i ended up yapping

i went through various mediums and styles of art when i was younger – i tried colored pencils, markers, watercolors, acrylics i tried drawing primarily anime, i tried semi-realism, i tried landscape art and all the while i was >obsessed< with the notion of “”finding my style”” as if that’s something you just come across or decide on one day. like i fully believed that all of the amazing artists i follow just sat down one day and decided on what their style would look like, so i constantly tried doing the same. and it never worked!!

i think the desire find MY art style had a lot to do with defining my identity as an artist. it’s nice to be consistent and have people recognize that – but also, i just tended to be veeery hyperfocused on getting better at art when i was younger. i was an extremely jealous child, especially when it came to drawing. instead of bonding with other kids who were into drawing i saw them as mortal enemies for some reason. drawing was supposed to be >my< thing, how dare they try to do it as well!!! so i guess i thought that if i landed on a style it would give me some sort of status over them or something. it was very silly and stupid

around high school is when everything changed. i had never realized just how constraining traditional art was to me before i started drawing digitally. i always had so many ambitious ideas i wanted to execute and couldn’t because i didn’t have the adequate tools or i didn’t own That One Particular Shade of Blue that i wanted to use God i Wish i had That Particular shade of blue etc. so digital art was perfect for me i finally felt like i could do whatever i wanted

i also met new friends in high school and they were artists as well! and upon seeing the way in which they interacted with one another and with me – just constantly hyping each other up, complimenting each other in a way that didn’t feel backhanded at all, just genuine support and happiness brought on by the fact that all of us draw – and i was like damn. yeah this is awesome. why wasn’t i like this before? i genuinely forgot how i could’ve ever felt jealous of other people for being into art when sharing that with others is so awesome!! you can collab and draw things for one another and learn from each other and it’s so cool!

so the combination of acquiring a better mindset about art + taking on digital art just resulted in me not being so frustrated all the time, which in turn resulted in me just….drawing without thinking about having or not having a style. and that’s how i “found” it. i just kept drawing. i’m still young and my style will keep changing as the years go by and it makes sense. i don’t really think about it at all anymore. just do what you like doing in art and eventually it’ll all fall into place. plus, Everyone has a style. even if you think you don’t. it’s kind of like accents. “ooh i don’t really think i have an accent…” you do. and if you draw, you have an art style. just give it some time so simmer

[shiori8]

Oh look! It's another redesign!

Here, have this little illustration based on my Ladybug/Chat Noir re-designs, that I've been slaving away at for the past month (we're just gonna ignore the fact that I started plotting out the costumes and sketched the pose a year ago lol). I know, I know. A redesign? Very original. But hey I haven't done it yet, so that makes it different ok😝!

(Gosh, I usually don't post sketches, I feel like this is exposing all my drawing weaknesses lol)

These are some of the first doodles I did. For Marinette I basically looked at some traditional Qui Pao and Hanfu dresses for inspiration and mixed and matched details I liked. I also gave her these little skirt flaps (?? whatever you want to call it) to symbolise the ladybug wings and kept the spots concentrated there. All in all I actually immediately knew what I wanted to do with her costume and pretty much just kept to my first draft, but what really gave me trouble was the hair somehow. I really wanted to incorporate actual antennae (I just think it's cute🤧!!!!) but it got too crowded up there so I had to let them go eventually🥺. In the end I settled for her twin tails pulled up instead of down. To make it look more distinct from her civilian form the idea was also that her hair colour changes to black after the transformation.

Chat Noir on the other hand was so difficult😭😭😭. I honestly like the original design soo much it was hard to think about alternatives. I wanted something that matched better with my new Ladybug, but I don't think I succeeded much. Also I hyperfocused on giving him this little scarf/oversized collar thing in my first doodles because I thought it looked cool and ended up scrapping it because the little bell is just too iconic not to keep lol. As you can tell from the final illustration there is actually not all that much that made it into the final version, except for the sheer sleeves, the shoes, the claw marks and some neon green details. I also ended up giving both of them some gold accents to make them match a bit more. As with Marinette, the idea is that Adrien's hair changes colour a bit after transforming too. So I envision Adrien having more of the smooth platinum blond in his civillian form and a more brown-ish dirty blond as Chat Noir, to go for the whole stray cat look lol.

I might come back to this one day, to re-do their civilian forms too or make these costumes more practical rather than just focusing on aesthetics (But hey if the show does this than I am allowed too😂!)

[derrickwildsun]

Post-TOTK Musings (TOTK Spoilers)

I think the reason Zelda didn't burst into tears at the end of the final boss fight was because she just caught up in the moment. She was hyperfocused on the immediate results of everything that had transpired: her centuries-long plan had succeeded, Link had destroyed Ganondorf, and she was back to her normal self again and eager to tell Link about her adventures in the past.

I don’t think the full impact of everything Zelda did in the past would have hit her until she returned to Hateno and reunited with all the friendly faces she had been so accustomed to prior to the Upheaval: the villagers, the children, Symin, etc. Seeing all their faces again and returning to her and Link’s house (and maybe seeing the new one Link built for just the two of them in her absence) would probably make her realize everything she would have left behind had Link et al not reversed her draconification. She formed all those bonds with the villagers through acts of kindess and earned the love and respect of the children by giving them a genuine love of learning like the kind she had her whole life. With Link, she had carved out a home where she could live comfortably and just be herself, doing research on whatever in privacy. The realization that she would have lost all that permanently would probably hit her like a sledgehammer. She wouldn’t just feel bad about herself, but she’d consider how devastated all those people (especially Link and the schoolchildren) would have been at the possibility of her being gone forever. After struggling with feelings of low self-esteem for most of her life, she would probably realize for the first time in her life that she actually matters as a person and that Hyrule is a better place with her in it.

Zelda would also come to realize just how much Rauru and Sonia meant to her. We don’t see her grieve either of them much in-game (likely due to time constraints), but it’s possible she mourned their losses somewhat before undergoing draconfication. But imagine how she must feel about them knowing that they enabled Link to turn her back to normal after thousands of years. Thousands of years ago, they promised to help her find a way home to “put Link’s mind at ease,” and not even death stopped them from fulfilling that promise. They were the parents she had dreamed of having her whole life, and in the end they did for her what Rhoam never could: they saved her. Her love for them would increase tenfold and she’d make sure that they would never be relegated to the dustbins of history.

And of course I can’t overlook her now-increased love for Link. If she ever had any reservations or inhibitions about tying the knot with Link, those reservations would be gone for good by now. She put all her faith in him to carry out her final wish, and he succeeded with flying colors. And not only that, he never gave up on her. Most people probably would have called it fate and declared her a lost cause, but Link didn’t consider his journey over until he had Zelda, the beautiful, nerdy princess he fell in love with hundreds of years ago, back in his life. They’re ride or die for one another, and they’ll never leave each other ever again.

[qafi]

Somethin I think is fascinating abt Aot / Avatar is their opposite attitudes towards relationships

Both series are reflective of WW2, focus on colonialism and genocide, however Avatar has an optimistic and pacifistic end, expressing hope for humanity and a future of peace. As we all know, the ending of AoT is grim.

Avatar is very pro-relationship, even though it interferes with Aangs ability to save the world (he is unable to let go of Katara to open his final chakra and master the avatar state). Iroh, the wise paternal figure, comments on this and says that love was a better choice. The same is true of Azula. She is obsessed with power, a perfectionist who knows how to control and intimidate everyone, but is abandoned by everyone and Mei iconically says “You made a mistake. I love Zuko more than I fear you”. Both narratives communicate the theme that you cannot control people with fear and you should release the obsession with power for the pursuit of love.

Eren, however, spends most of the series resistant to Mikasa’s love for him, finds it annoying and obtrusive. She is stronger than him, shows him up, always gets in the way between him and what he wants because she is concerned for his safety (similarly to Katara). He compares Mikasa to a slave because of her devotion. The story ends with a heroic Mikasa who saves the world by putting her duty before love and killing Eren. Similarly, the slave Ymir betrays the king who she loves and ends the titan curse.

(Look at this scene. Look at how it frames love, the fucking tragedy of it.)

As for the other characters, we seldom see them kissing or displaying an interest in sex despite being sexually mature. Erwin has a girl he was interested in but gave her up to be commander.

Hange and Levi are humanities strongest/smartest and they are supposed to be like bad parental figures guidance to Eren. Levi is said to be celibate by Isayama and although develops feelings for people (Petra) does not act on them, and sacrifices her dead body to lighten the weight of a wagon. Because Hange is hyperfocused with titans they neglect their romantic life and physical appearance, they are always completely baffled when sex or puberty is brought up.

This is a scientist who is over thirty years old, yet they do not understand testosterone. This implies they are asexual or perhaps a virgin.

I do agree with what Isayama says, that it is kind of depressing that a lot of media for women made by women revolves around finding a man. Pitiful, he calls it. He gives his female heroines freedom from love as a kindness.

In conclusion uhhhhh both of these shows are fantastic even if their messages are complete opposite.

[finnibugz]

Bo Sinclair X Reader (Oneshot(unfinished))

Requested by the lovely and wonderful @charliedawn

Synopsis: In which reader has become very interested in Bos hands, Bo takes notice and teases them.

Reader is g/n. They/Them pronouns will be used.

Warnings: Not many, some language, and innuendos on Bos end.

NOT PROOFREAD.

It was a warm day in Louisiana. Magnolias were in bloom and birds were heard chirping happily overhead. (Y/N) stretched in the porch chair they were sitting in, feeling a few satisfying pops along their spine. Bo had ceased work on his truck to enjoy the early afternoon with them, having stepped inside for a beer and a (favourite drink) for them. (Y/N) relaxed back into the chair as their thoughts began to drift. First about the birds, then about the truck, then about Bo working on said truck. About how his hands expertly moved around wires and valves in the engine. How strong and flexible his hands must be. How they might feel holding their own hand. Their thoughts were interupted by an ice cold beer can touching the back of their neck.

"ACK! GOD DAMMNIT BEAUREGARD!" They jumped out of their chair and turned on the now cackling brunet. He wiped a fake tear from his eye.

"Oh calm down." He handed them their drink. "Its not even that cold!"

"You just pulled in out of the fridge!" They reached for their drink, fingers just brushing his. "Its freezing-" they trailed off. They looked at the drink in their hands, no not at the drink. Bo's hand still holding it their fingers crossed together. His fingers were callused but soft. They felt themselves wanting more of them. But Bo pulled his hand away, and popped the tab on his can. He took a big swig.

"I should get back to work." He gave (Y/N) a small smile. "You're welcome to help if you want!" He took off down the porch steps and headed over to his truck.

(Y/N) took a sip of their drink, their fingers still tingling from the short contact. They sighed wistfully and followed after Bo. The leaned gently against the truck while Bo messed with the engine. He occasionally asked for a tool. (Y/N) handed him the tools and went back to watching his hands. Their mind began to wander again.

They could see the tendons moving under his skin. They wondered what his hands would feel like pressed against their bare sides. Squeezing and tugging at the flesh. Would they be rough with his calluses or soft from the oil?Their face flushed slightly at the thought. Bo held his hand out and asked them something.

"Hm? What?" They shook their head to clear the fog, and looked at his hand.

"I asked for the wrench over there on your left?" He questioned. "Are you alright? You've been pretty distracted today."

"Oh yeah im fine. Just thinking." They picked up the wrench and handed it to him, their hand lingering again. When they pulled away they let their finger brush his palm. He raised an eyebrow but shrugged and continued with the engine. They worked in relative silence for the rest of the afternoon.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was getting quite humid when they decided to finally head back inside. Lester was chilling on the couch and Vincent was off in his basement working on an art project. Bo headed off to the kitchen to wash his hands, while (Y/N) plopped themselves down on the couch next to Lester.

Lester could sense the tension and inquired about what was wrong.

"It's just..." They started, wondering if it was okay to tell Lester about the hand fixation they had on his brother. They decided not to, considering their little "problem" was their weird fixation on Bos hands. You shouldn't tell his brothers about that... That's just weird.

"Don't worry about it Les." They assured him. "I'll be fine."

Lester shrugged and began to pet Jonesys head. He then began talking about his day. (Y/N) simply nodded and listened.

Meanwhile Bo was in the kitchen washing his hands. (Y/N) seemed very hyperfocused on them. He had a theory but would need to test it. After he dried them he snuck up the stairs past the couch and grabbed a bottle of Jergens (a top tier lotion btw) and began massaging it into his hands. Once it had all soaked in he made his way back down the stairs rubbing his hands together to warm them up. He turned the corner to see Lester rolling on the floor with Jonesy laughing, while she playfully growled and barked.

(Y/N) sat laughing at their display of affection. Bo walked into the couch pushing them aside and sitting down. He then pulled them onto his lap.

AND THAT'S ALL FOLKS...

I could not bring myself to finish this. I'm sorry to @charliedawn who requested this but I just could not do it. It's been hard trying to get back into writing but I'm not gonna make up excuses for myself other than, I've never been a good writer, in the sense that I just don't like it. I'm sorry again! 😓

[janzoo]

Some notes on Ancients and Greek mythology - spoilers within for Final Fantasy XIV, especially Shadowbringers and Endwalker. This isn’t necessarily new information, but I haven’t seen anything about it here on Tumblr yet. Let’s have a lil fun with (mostly) Greek mythology under the readmore -

Hi folks! While trying to figure out an Azem for my WoL, I found some info that I’d like to share. Not all Ancients take their name directly from Greek mythology, if at all. And of those that do, matching the character’s gender to their namesake’s doesn’t seem to matter, either. So for those of you like me who are figuring out an Azem or other Ancient OCs, relax! Ancients’ names aren’t as strict as we might think.

While “Hythlodaeus” is a name in the ancient Greek language, it doesn’t come from mythos. In fact, it comes from a satirical novel called “Utopia” that was published in 1516; it roughly translates as “speaker/distributor of nonsense”.

Mitron’s real name is Artemis. Mitron is male, but Artemis was a goddess.

“Venat” is a reference to a character from Final Fantasy XII of the same name, and comes from Latin “to hunt”. (Some think that the katakana for her name, which spells out in romaji as “vēnesu”, is supposed to be “Venus”. It’s more likely that it’s supposed to spell “Veneth”, but there’s no way to write “th” sounds in katakana. The same mix-up happened with Aerith in FFVII.)

So yeah, if you want to branch out from Greek mythology, or play with gender, or whatever, cool! Not that you weren’t cool to do so anyway - this is all just for funsies in the end. In the meantime, I’ve put together a few lesser known names and figures from (mainly Greek) mythology that could also prove interesting names/inspirations for Ancients. These are very much simplified versions of the myths. Please don’t be an ass if there’s “wrong” info, the myths vary a lot and I’m doing this in my own spare time for fun and because I’m hyperfocusing/infodumping about some special interests.

Tiresias/Teiresias: One day, Tiresias found a couple of snakes mating, and beat them to death with a stick. This angered Hera, and she turned him into a woman. Tiresias then lived for several years as a woman, including getting married and having children. She then found some mating snakes again, and either beat them to death again or didn’t - either way she became a man again. He then became an oracle - the “how” varies between stories but the version I was told was that Zeus and Hera were arguing over who has better orgasms. Zeus argued that it’s women, and Hera vice versa. They decided to ask Tiresias, since he’d experienced both. He said it’s women. Hera became pissed at him again and blinded him. Zeus felt bad about this and gave Tiresias the gift of prophecy as a sort of consolation. Some myths say that this gift worked by allowing Tiresias to understand birdsong. (Between the gift of prophecy and the gender “fluidity”, Tiresias sounds like a prime candidate for Urianger’s Ancient imo.)

Sibyl: Technically a title denoting a prophetess, but we’re making it a name now. I’m referring specifically to the story of the Cumaean Sibyl. Apollo came to her, offering a wish in exchange for her virginity. She held up a handful of sand and asked for as many years as grains of sand she held. However, she later reneged on her part of the deal, refusing to sleep with Apollo. He granted her the extended life she wanted, but did not preserve her age or body. Sibyl shrank with age until she was no more than sand herself, kept in a jar. She was still conscious and had a voice. She’s referenced to at the beginning of T.S. Eliot’s poem “The Waste Land” like so (translated from Latin and Greek): For once I myself saw with my own eyes the Sibyl of Cumae hanging in a jar, and when the boys said, "Sibyl, what do you want?" she replied "I want to die."

Hecate: Greek goddess of magic/witchcraft, transitions, and crossroads. (Many sources also say necromancy, creatures of the night, and ghosts.) I don’t have a specific story for her, I just think she’s cool.

Deimos and Phobos: Sons of Ares, god of war, though they’re more metaphors than proper gods. “Deimos” means “dread” and “phobos” means “fear”. They accompanied their father into war; thus, when Ares descended onto the battlefield, he brought dread and fear with him.

Ma’at/Maat: Let’s dip into ancient Egypt! Ma’at was the goddess of harmony, truth, and justice, said to balance the stars and the seasons. Most notable was her feather, the Feather of Truth, which was used to weigh the hearts of the dead. If the dead person’s heart was lighter than or equal to the weight of her feather, they were deemed worthy of proceeding into the afterlife proper. (The Feather made a cameo in Marvel’s “Moon Knight” lol)

Bast/Bastet/Ailuros (Greek): The Egyptian goddess with the cat head. You’ve probably at least heard of her. Defender of kings and goddess of pregnancy/childbirth. Sometimes depicted as the gentler aspect of the more aggressive lioness-headed goddess Sekhmet. Honestly, I’m mainly listing her because a) she has a cool Greek name if you want to stick with that, and 2) it could be a fun option if you want to be really on-the-nose with the Ancient of a Miqo’te lol.

My hyperfocus seems to have about run its course, so I’m finishing the post here. The point is that if/when you’re making an Ancient OC, you’re not bound to ancient Greece, or matching gender for gender. Thanks for reading. :D

[mysticvixin]

I might be cursed.

It's like no matter what I do it's fucking broken or doesn't work the way I want it to.

For example, today i wanted to do a stream where I drew. My computer monitors weren't set up the way I like it so I thought it was broken and I was already emotionally exhausted from the previous days. Gave up on that and took a break so I can vent everything out at therapy.

Computer screen goes dark literally five minutes into the session. I just want to cry. But still able to communicate with therapist but it was still fucking embarrassing. Had to turn computer on and off again and then fix battery settings to never let my computer just go dark after a period of time.

Rest of the day was okay. Lost all my custom pens but most are still able to be downloaded, got some new brushes and shit. Doodled a updated version of vtuber. Cool. Lovely. Fantastic. just watched youtube. Hyperfocused on it in fact cause i was in the 'Did I draw this with my hand like it was me? I made this?" phase.

Looked at a lot of anime boys for ref I guess.

It's getting late now. Everything seems to be chill still. Things are finally settling down.

Then my wacom pen breaks and now I can't draw digitally. And not like just the nib, the tip of the nib broke with the end of it still in the pen. I can't remove that bit out. and even if I did the pen is still technically broken.

replacement is about 35 dollars. Fine. Whatever.

At least the footage is fine now after resetting my pc and shit. And while I realize the majority of this is simply due to my typical computer functions not being what I'm used to and having to log into things or redownload things again, it's still upsetting. Makes me feel out of control and frankly hopeless. Also doesn't help that I'm terrified given the election this close to the end. as well as the desperation for a job, living in my mom's closet, it's just hitting all at once and I just feel like scum on the bottom of the world's shoe. I realize I'm being negative but I'm simply feeling my emotions out.

and this is me doing that right now. As my therapist recommended. So pardon if im rambling or repeat im just so fucking tired of existing right now and i know that i will laugh at this in the future. I will also get through this and I will move on.

I always do. It's what I've been doing my whole life. Anyway. please don't take this as me wanting pity. I don't want it. This is just life. and if life was predictable and easy then there would be no variety or flavor to it. But at the same time I wish I didn't have to suffer. I wish no one had to suffer. But without it.. There's no real point to life either.

I know what it's like to have everything..it's torture.. At least for me.

but that's probably a tale for another day.

I just feel like im getting kicked into the mud over and over and over again with no breaks big enough for me to adapt and stand back up. I've had old thought processes plaguing me through all of this. I refuse to listen to them. And I refuse to fall back into those mindsets. It will get me nowhere.

All I can say is just keep going. It's the best you can do. No matter how small you inch forward. You are going forward regardless.

Time will pass.

Things will change.

Just keep going.

[derrickwildsun]

I think Zelda was just caught up in the moment at the end of the boss fight. She was hyperfocused on the immediate results of everything that had transpired: her centuries-long plan had succeeded, Link had destroyed Ganondorf, and she was back to her normal self again and eager to tell Link about her adventures in the past.

I don't think the full impact of everything Zelda did in the past would have hit her until she returned to Hateno and reunited with all the friendly faces she had been so accustomed to prior to the Upheaval: the villagers, the children, Symin, etc. Seeing all their faces again and returning to her and Link's house (and maybe seeing the new one Link built for just the two of them in her absence) would probably make her realize everything she would have left behind had Link et al not reversed her draconification. She formed all those bonds with the villagers through acts of kindess and earned the love and respect of the children by giving them a genuine love of learning like the kind she had her whole life. With Link, she had carved out a home where she could live comfortably and just be herself, doing research on whatever in privacy. The realization that she would have lost all that permanently would probably hit her like a sledgehammer. She wouldn't just feel bad about herself, but she'd consider how devastated all those people (especially Link and the schoolchildren) would have been at the possibility of her being gone forever. After struggling with feelings of low self-esteem for most of her life, she would probably realize for the first time in her life that she actually matters as a person and that Hyrule is a better place with her in it.

Zelda would also come to realize just how much Rauru and Sonia meant to her. We don't see her grieve either of them much in-game (likely due to time constraints), but it's possible she mourned their losses somewhat before undergoing draconfication. But imagine how she must feel about them knowing that they enabled Link to turn her back to normal after thousands of years. Thousands of years ago, they promised to help her find a way home to "put Link's mind at ease," and not even death stopped them from fulfilling that promise. They were the parents she had dreamed of having her whole life, and in the end they did for her what Rhoam never could: they saved her. Her love for them would increase tenfold and she'd make sure that they would never be relegated to the dustbins of history.

And of course I can't overlook her now-increased love for Link. If she ever had any reservations or inhibitions about tying the knot with Link, those reservations would be gone for good by now. She put all her faith in him to carry out her final wish, and he succeeded with flying colors. And not only that, he never gave up on her. Most people probably would have called it fate and declared her a lost cause, but Link didn't consider his journey over until he had Zelda, the beautiful, nerdy princess he fell in love with hundreds of years ago, back in his life. They're ride or die for one another, and they'll never leave each other ever again.

something crazy that’s just crossed my mind is the whole thing of does zelda miss link while she’s stuck in the past? i know the memories don’t do shit all justice to tell us ANYTHING about zelda’s feelings on this whole situation but it does make you wonder. i personally think she misses him like he’s dead

because imagine this. you’ve been trapped in stasis for literally a century. you’ve watched all of your friends and family die. then your knight, the one you watched die in your arms, finally comes back and frees you. you then move into a small house together, it’s not much but it’s honest living. you spruce it up with decorations until you can both stand back and say, “yeah, this feels like home.” you live the next year or so quaintly, travelling around hyrule to restore it to its former glory as best as you can, all within the company of someone you hold closer than a best friend. he’s still there, even though he doesn’t have to be, and follows you ever loyally. you wonder if he’ll ever go his own way, but his insistence on remaining by your side makes you think otherwise.

you believe in the strength of learning, that the children of hyrule need to be better educated in order to solidify a strong future for the kingdom, so you build a school. you hire teachers and organise the school’s curriculum, taking part so much that you become a teacher yourself. he greets you every evening when you come home and plates up dinner already piping hot so you don’t have to worry about it. life continues this way, simple and non exhaustive, living earnestly beside someone who would extinguish the sun if it meant you’d smile. you love him, realistically, and he loves you too.

something stirs under the castle and, like the good princess you are, you go trundling into the depths below with your loyal knight to solve the problem. it bears endless discoveries, things you know you’ll stay up all night studying; things that bring you so much joy that he holds your torch so you can enjoy it without interruption. instead of the torch, he’s soon holding a shattered blade in his bloody hand, arm eaten and burnt raw by something that smells so vile it’s all you can do not to vomit. you watch the world fall into peril once more, and as you do so, you feel yourself falling to the exact same fate. you see the way he throws away legend and jumps after you, knowing that he is also falling to his demise. you see the fear in his eyes, the way tears cling to the corners of them and feel the burn of your own.

his plan was always to die by your side, and he will do it by any means necessary.

you wake up and he’s gone, your world is gone, and you’re somewhere new. two strange people greet you and quickly take you under their wing, and while a new world means endless discoveries, you can’t help but wonder if link is dead. did he kill himself alongside you, only for you to somehow survive and let him fall alone? the thought makes the bile creep up your throat.

who’s to say that, during the period of time where link is unconscious, she isn’t wracked with guilt at the realisation that he may be dead? she’s thousands upon thousands of years in the past, and his body may be the only one laid cold at the bottom of that chasm. would people even remember him? yes, he was the hero of hyrule, but he’d always kept a low profile. humble to a fault, she’d tell him. and the fault may be that if he’s dead, perhaps only her name would grace the lips of hyrule. the survivor’s guilt would eat her whole knowing that he’s died for her twice now.

so you can imagine her relief when she feels the pull of him and his sword. the relief when she can make her vow to him. the relief in knowing that he’s okay, somehow, and that he’s alive above everything else. but now that she knows he’s okay, what’s there left to do? well, miss him, of course. they’re inseparable and very rarely do things without the company of the other, she’s going to miss him like her right arm.

in the day she’s surrounded by people—sonia, rauru, mineru and her army of constructs, plus the rest of the people of this era of hyrule—but come the night, she’s alone. her bed lacks the warmth it used to hold, doesn’t bear the imprint of where her love has slept beside her. she’s painfully, irrefutably alone. she’ll step out onto the balcony of the castle alone and wish he was by her side, wish that she could just speak to him again even for a little while. for as long as she walks this hyrule, there is an overwhelming, gaping hole in her chest. she finds comfort in the presence of sonia, rauru and mineru but there’s only so much they can do. she talks to sonia about him. she talks to rauru about him. she talks to mineru about him. anyone who will listen to her speak of her talented hero, she will talk to.

she rides a construct and thinks of him. a steward construct explains to her the biodiversity of the land and she thinks of him. she spends her nights at her desk, quill in hand and illuminated by candlelight, and writes in her diary as if she’s speaking to him. it cuts her open over and over with every day she has to wake up alone.

when she decides the only thing fate has left in store for her is to become a dragon to aid link in the future, she weeps for days on end. she knows that this is it, everything she’s ever known will be beyond her forever now. she lives on in the skies, but her soul dies here. all those years they spent together building a life together, growing, all for nothing. they were cursed from the very beginning. ever since they fell to the calamity the first time fate has had it out for them. and so her last thoughts while she can still think are of him. she prays for his safety, for his success, and for him to have a happy and long life without her. she weeps knowing she’ll never grow old with him or get to experience the revival of her kingdom. it tears her from the inside out, and she screams even as a dragon at the loss. it’s overwhelming, devastating beyond any weight words could hold. she’s lost everything, lost everyone, and lost herself. she was doomed from the beginning. she was never meant to be happy.

so yes, the ending of totk should’ve been a HELL of a lot more emotionally charged. seeing someone you thought was dead AND that you worried you’d never see again?? she’d be crying for hours in his arms

[kozidraws]

Krbk walking past a row of gacha machines on the streets when one catches Bakugo's attention. He immediately beelines for it, finishing out his wallet to get coins.

Kirishima follows him, amused as he looks at the gacha display and gasps.

"Oh! It's our class!"

Kirishima hasn't seen much merchandise of them yet, mainly because they just graduated, but the machine had super cute mini figurine versions of them and their classmates in their hero suits. He instantly searched for Bakugo's and smiled. Mini Bakugo looked so manly!!!

They gave him little explosions and his winning smirk. Kirishima is pretty tempted to try and play to get him for himself.

Not while his crush was present though.

He watches Bakugo open up a capsule and sees the blond grunt in disgust when it reveals a mini Mineta.

Bakugo almost looks ready to burn it. Since there were no bins nearby Bakugo opens his gym bag and drops it in before going back to depositing more coins. Clearly not getting the result he wanted, and tried three more times.

Iida. Ojiro. Momo.

Kirishima tried to hide a smile.

It was kinda funny and cute how determined Bakugo's expression was as he kept playing.

"Fuck! Stop giving me Deku and Half n Half you stupid machine!" Bakugo growls, smacking the display in warning.

Kirishima couldn't help the chuckle he let out that time. Bakugo was really getting fired up!

He watches Bakugo open up Kaminari, Mina and Sero capsules.

Bakugo keeps going.

Kirishima glances down to Bakugo's gym bag, he's almost got their whole class in there.

When Bakugo finally opens a capsule to reveal a mini version of himself Kirishima thought that was the end of it.

Bakugo drops his mini version in the bag with a grunt.

Huh.

Kirishima wasn't expecting that. His eyes darted between the mini Bakugo and the real one.

Does that mean Bakugo is going to throw mini Bakugo out!?

He's too cute to go out like that!

Luckily Bakugo is still distracted so Kirishima quickly bends down to swipe the figure and puts it in his jacket pocket.

Successful rescue mission!

"Damn it I'm out of yen!" Bakugo curses and hits the machine again.

Kirishima pats him on the shoulder, partly in sympathy, partly in please don't cause property damage.

Then he takes out his wallet to count the loose change. Just enough for one gacha play.

"Hey Bakugo, I have enough yen if you want to play one more time?"

Bakugo glares down at the offered money.

"No."

"Oh..."

"You do it, I have the worst fucking luck." Bakugo grumbles, crossing his arms, the pout deepening.

"Oh!" Kirishima raises the money to the coin slot and pauses, "are you sure?"

"Do it."

He threads the money into the machine.

As Kirishima turns the dial he suddenly feels super tense, he could feel Bakugo's unwavering glare at the machine, daring it to deny what he wanted again.

The capsule dropped into the dispenser.

He cautiously reaches in to pick up the capsule and opens it.

A mini Red Riot stares up at him. Kirishima smiles and holds it up.

"Hey look! Finally a mini me!-" He stops talking when he sees Bakugo's eyes are hyperfocused on the figurine.

"Gimme."

"Wha-" Kirishima yelps in surprise when Bakugo lunges at him.

He's too stunned to really defend himself when he feels Bakugo's warm hands touch his to swipe the figurine. The blond's face was super red as he quickly turned and bent down towards his bag.

Bakugo wanted a mini Red Riot!?

Kirishima.exe has stopped working.

Kirishima could feel his face heating up.

'Could that mean-?'

He was snapped out of his thoughts when Bakugo started muttering.

"Where the fuck did that little gremlin go." He growled, rifling through the gym bag, tossing heroes and empty capsule balls all over the place.

'Oh my God, he's looking for mini Bakugo.'

The figure suddenly feels heavy in his pocket.

Bakugo really did look frustrated.

Kirishima reached into his pocket, hovering over the figure. He /could/ play dumb about this whole thing.

But that wouldn't be very manly, huh?

Mustering up the courage, Kirishima holds up the mini Bakugo.

"Is this what you were looking for?"

Bakugo looks up and double takes when he sees little Dynamight, now the tips of his ears are getting red.

"Wh- how- nevermind, hand him over."

"No."

Kirishima can see Bakugo opening his mouth to argue so he raises a hand to ask him to wait.

"I think this is a fair trade. You can have Red Riot but Dynamight belongs to me." He states, a slight tease to his tone as he hugs the figure close to his chest.

Bakugo's face couldn't get any redder, darting his eyes away from Kirishima to look at the ground, mumbling something under his breath.

"What did you just say Bakugo?" He asks, walking closer.

Bakugo's eyes flicker up to his.

"I said...he's been yours for a while now."

Kirishima’s heart is beating a mile a minute as he bends down in front of Bakugo to get eye level.

"As I said with Red Riot, he's yours too."

"Really?"

"Really."

Bakugo's eyes dart down to Kirishima's lips then back to his eyes. His mouth ticking up into a soft smirk.

"Then how about we finalise that trade?"

Kirishima smiles back at him, his hand slowly covering Bakugo's.

"And how should we do that, hmm?"

"Like this," Bakugo leans forward to close the small distance and Kirishima meets him half way. The kiss was soft but firm and he loved every second of it.

It was perfect.

He leaned back slightly and smiled, touching their foreheads together.

"Trade accepted."

/END

[peterparkersnose]

Escape

ben solo x reader

kylo ren x reader

word count: 1.2k

warnings: none, kylo ren becomes ben solo once again, established relationship, leg wound

a/n please give your authors notes, we work so hard on our stuff. if you didn’t enjoy it, feel free to ignore it but if you did, please leave your writers even a like. it means the world. re blogs are appreciated but not necessary. thank you loves. 

summary Kylo Ren has to make the tough decision for his future with his wife

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read time: 4 mins 27 seconds

You were reading silently in your corner in the living room. The dark essence of the apartment always gave you an eerie feeling, so you would read horror to match the mood. It was a high tensity part of the book, you were on the edge of your seat when the door came flying open. You yelped, throwing the book in fright when you realized Kylo had just returned home for the day. 

He grunted, throwing his helmet on the floor. He kicked his boots against the wall and threw his cape on the floor like a toddler. 

“What’s wrong with you?” you asked in an annoyed tone, eyebrow raised. He said nothing and returned to his study, slamming the door behind him. Noise erupted from the room, crashes and loud bangs filled the apartment. Finally, the tantrum seemed to have ended. You huffed and rose off your chair, picking up his helmet and cape and following him. Of course, the door was locked. 

“I have your stuff,” you said calmly. No response. You knocked slightly, hoping that he would respond to the kind approach. “Please let me in,” 

You heard the door click, signaling that he unlocked it. You opened it slightly, revealing a mess. Books had been knocked off the shelf, papers were scattered all over the room. You found Kylo sitting in front of the victim bookcase, with a large gash down the middle. It gave a crackling sound that made you sigh. 

His belongings were placed on the ground as you went to comfort your husband. You placed a hand on his back, and reached for his lightsaber that he was hyperfocusing on. He let you take it, and you set it on his desk. Now sitting on your knees, you wrapped your arm around him. He sat breathing heavy. 

You were unsure if he wanted to speak or not. You wanted to know why he was so upset. It was rare he would come home like this. You were running through on what you should do in your head when he finally spoke. 

“You should not worry about me,” 

“I always worry about you,” “Well stop.” “I can’t just stop, Kylo.” 

He rested his head on your shoulder and took a deep breathe. “We were planning a counter attack on the resistance today when one of my lieutenants gave me coordinates to the lead resistance base,” 

You shook your head in understandment. “Isn’t that a good thing?” you asked, squeezing his shoulder. 

“I already had those coordinates.” he sighed. You sat for a moment. “Your mad because your lieutenant gave you information you already knew? I can see that as a inconvenience but Kylo, honey, it should not ruin your whole day. We really need to work on your-”

“It is the base where my mother lives,” 

Oh. 

He never spoke about his mother. You only knew he had one because Hux had brought it up briefly once. He had bruises on his neck for weeks. 

“I feel myself becoming weak,” Kylo whispered, almost relieved he said it out loud. “I don’t think your weak.” “The supreme leader feels it too.”

You shuttered at the mention of the supreme leader. 

“Your not weak. You are the strongest man I know. I trust you will make the decision that you feel is right.” you said, intertwining your fingers with his. Your hand was so small in comparison to his. 

“I know what I have to do but I don’t know if I’m strong enough to do it.” Kylo said, his breaths shuttering. 

“I will be there every step of the way. I promise.”

-

Three nights had passed. You hadn’t heard much from your husband besides a couple passing “Good mornings,”

He had absolutely consumed himself in his work almost to the point where it was concerning. He wouldn’t sleep. He wouldn’t eat. You knew he was suffering. 

On the third day you were peacefully folding some of your clothes on the bed. Kylo was at work and you didn’t expect much noise in the apartment except for a possible mail droid. 

When you heard a loud crash from the kitchen, you were worried. You grabbed your small blaster from your bedside table and krept down the stairs. 

The worrying sight of your husband rummaging through your emergency supplies was brought to your eyes. He felt your presence and turned to face you. When your eyes met, something was different. 

Maybe the fact that he was covered in sweat and blood should have been off putting, but it wasn’t his appearance that was much different. 

It was his soul. 

Something you had only heard tiny rumors about before you knew him, before you joined the First Order. 

Ben. 

You quickly understood and rushed down the stairs. “Take what you need, were not coming back.” he said out of breath. With the chaotic life of being the wife of Kylo Ren, you pretty much had all your valuables packed up and ready to go. 

It started to get concerning when alarms starting blaring off around the ship. You slipped your to go bag over your shoulder along with a backpack. 

“Is this really happening?” you asked him. 

He turned and looked deeply into your soul. He took your hands and sighed. “We must go now.” 

You followed Kylo quietly down each secret corner. He knew this ship like the back of his hand. Avoiding troopers, making sure no conflict would happen. He knew he had to keep you safe. 

The workers bunks were the safest to escape from. They had escape pods for emergencies that would most likely go undetected from the Commander’s pit. Kylo practically threw you into it, then followed with your stuff. Just as he was about to get in, what seemed like a platoon of Storm Troopers starting blasting their blasters. “Get down!” he yelled to you, struggling to close the hatch. 

Kylo was quick to seal the hatch shut, but not before a shot bounced off his leg. The sound of the sizzling from his leg made you nauseous. You started searching the ship for the bacta spray when Kylo interrupted you. “No use. They don’t supply the working ships with them. I’ll be fine.” 

“But I’m-”

“I know. Your always worried about me. But everything will be okay now.”

The silence between the two of you was almost painful. Kylo had asked you to try to dispatch a resistance base, but you were struggling to find one. 

He had pulled comms and tracking out of the ship and released them into space. You two were officially off the map. 

The radio scratching was hurting your head. You kept calling for a resistance fighter to call in, but nothing happened. The ship was going so fast, you felt like you were going a million miles per hour. 

“...resistance copy to…”

“I think we got one,” you said, adjusting the knobs on the reader. “Copy to resistance!” you yelled through the speaker. “Copy. May we ask who this is?” the pilot asked. 

“Who are we?” you asked, turning to your husband. 

His gaze was glossy and out of touch. “Ben Solo.” he said, not moving a muscle. 

“A-are you sure won’t they-”

“They’ll know. She’ll know.” he assured you. 

“Ben Solo, repeat, we are Ben Solo.” 

-

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[k-indie]

But Did You Like It

Pairings: Gamer!Rindō x Game Developer!Reader

Situation: in which Rindō falls in love with not just the game you made that he beta tested...

The game was beyond amazing.

It had your coworkers reeling from the trailer alone. You were proud of it, but not nearly as much as you should've been. You wanted your childhood friend to play it and tell you all about how amazing it was before you let your department publish anything, not even the pre-trailer.

There was something cute about the way he'd knit his brows together when he was focused on the games he'd immerse himself in and how he'd mindlessly bite into the snack he had at hand, making you wish it was your lips he was biting so tenderly.

And when you did have him beta test it, it took him almost two weeks to finish it. The game had great graphics, the plot was difficult just enough to keep any gamers coming back, and it was the perfect length to keep people interested. It also offered multiplayer and co-op features that would allow players to run around the digital land freely if they didn't want to play story-mode.

You were beginning to get antsy when he slowly imbibed the slushy you'd bought him, biting into his pizza his usual pace but to you seemed teasingly slow. Your fingers drummed on the table impatiently, watching as he swallowed smoothly and looked back at you from his gaze on the screen across the room.

"Well..."

You slowly sighed, calming your anxiety as he began to speak.

"It's long."

You sighed and lolled your head to one side, annoyed.

"Okay... What else?"

"The plot is pretty cool."

You were getting ticked off with the one-liners, hoping he'd open up more instead of dangling that carrot.

"The last boss is extremely hard to beat... But it's worth it in the end."

Your satisfaction was being teased, just an inch closer to where it should've been thirty minutes ago, the start of your lunch break. He'd finally finished the near two-week long testing and he didn't show you any emotion, deciding that if he teased you about it a little bit, you'd spend that much more time with him instead if leaving so quickly as you normally did to get it published and immediately work on a new project. He could admit openly that he was fond of you, but nothing further, he didn't want to scare you away having seen how treated the last guy who had confessed more to you than his love for your games.

"So... You like it?"

"It's definitely going to make production a boatload of cash."

You groaned inwardly, disapproving his comment openly with your expression.

Just tell me already...

"But do you like it?"

A lopsided smirk found it's way to your eyes, teasing you further and for the last time.

"I like more than just your game, (Name)."

You were too excited to focus on what the sentence meant, hyperfocusing only on the fact that he liked your game and as you were about to get up from the table, his hand found yours and tugged you lightly before you could run off as quickly as you could to get the publishers on the task.

"I wanted to tell you something else."

"What could that be? You already said you liked the game. Is there something wrong with it?"

He almost laughed at the confused face you gave him, finding it endearing that you cared so much about every thought, feeling, or opinion that ran through his handsome head. "No, nothing. I think you may have missed what I said before. I think your game is perfect. In fact, it's almost as perfect as you are and-"

"(Name), are we publishing it or not?"

Your coworker yelled at you, quickly snatching you up from the table and leading you out of the lounge to finish the last tweeks and publishing credits for the bug reveal that would be in three days from then. You looked to Rindō as you were dragged along behind your colleague, wondering what he was going to say, jealousy storming his eyes at how the man was gripping your attention and wringing it's neck, away from Rindō and into an abyss he didn't like to stare into.

How long would it be this time? How long would he have to wait to see you, tell you what he couldn't finish that day? When would you give him your time he desperately needed, deserved, wanted? Couldn't you blow off work for a while? Sure, you'd had a wonderful following and plenty of income to last for many years and take care of your future generations if you decided to have them— hopefully with him. But it was something you were passionate about and he knew it, but he couldn't help his selfish thoughts about you, wishing you'd just quit your job already and spend your time with him, love him the way he loved you.

Rindō had been a fan of your ideas and the way you expressed them for years, and when your first game was published, he was the first to play it before you decided to appoint him as your beta tester.

That afternoon, he went back to his flat, disappointed and deflated at the failed attempt to spill his feelings to you. And he waited long hours for a text from you that never came.

"It'll be published in two days. We're having a celebration that day as well for the big reveal, bring a plus-one if you want, it'll be an open party. To (Name)!"

Your district manager had raised a toast to you, the best game developer they'd had in decades, bringing the entire department back to life from your first hit game and you'd been highly sought after by many other companies but you wanted to stay in Tokyo with the small-fry company you worked with for the sole purpose of being near your friends and family in Tokyo.

And when you raised your glass, you couldn't help the burning desire for Rindō to be there with you, see his beautiful smile at your tenth successful video game in that decade, tease you about the faux-alcohol that your manager insisted on pouring for everyone, and congratulating you before the event you hoped he'd accept your invitation to. You still couldn't shake the words he was saying earlier that day, but you had lots of work to do and couldn't spare a moment so you decided to finish the toast and get back to work quickly to be able to spend more time with him after it was done and take a break from production to give him the time and attention you wanted him to have and receive that same energy from him.

When the morning of the reveal came, you had called Rindō, hoping to hear a grand yes from his pretty lips as you asked for his company at the event that night. When he said he couldn't, you were distraught, groggily and lazily preparing yourself for the day, not putting much energy into the outfit for the evening at the disappointment that was heard when you shut your phone down completely. Figuring he was busy, you tried to shake your sadness away and focus on the announcement of your game on live television and some other recorded channels.

You had a speech prepared for the game at your managers request. And you almost rejected it last minute before recalling the sole reason you'd made that game and you wished the reason had accepted your invitation to be your date.

And when you it was time for you to arrive at the venue, you were already forgetting the disappointment because the venue was fit for a queen— to show off her futuristic action game.

Your eyes drunk in the beautiful sight that was the building, taking your breath away almost when you laid eyes on the purple carpet, it was just like from your video game, triangles in bright reds and blues tessellating along the carpet as your heels stomped proudly over it. The lights dancing across your skin made you look like a character from your game almost— minus the outfits and lack of certain alien features.

There were all sorts of game developers, beta testers and producers at the venue drinking and mingling and you were at the center of it all that night. Maybe you'd win an award after the game has been deemed eligible for nomination.

You couldn't help the mindless desperation to look in every corner of the room to find that beautiful lilac-haired beaut that you missed so much. And when you didn't find him, you sat at a table designated for you and your team, where an unknown man sat beside you and began asking you about your game developing techniques and potential shadowing he could do. And you indulged his endless questions, being vague for most of it so he didn't try to steal or sell you out to the press so no one could leak important information about you.

And before you could tell the annoying man to piss off, your name was shouted out loud, earning a loud round of applause, whistles, and screams that your 'game trailer was fire', you had gone up to the podium where you'd give your speech about the game, how it came to fruition, and other things in that regard.

"Thank you all so much for coming and thank you to the viewers watching this right now. Your support has given me great courage to continue my journey and career in game development."

The crowd cheered and you allowed a moment for everyone to settle down. You hesitated, looking down at your notes, ears ringing at the sudden silence from the crowd and building, overwhelming emotions. You sighed as you folded the notes and set them aside at the podium.

"Honestly, I was going to refuse to do this speech at the last minute. I felt a bit disappointed that someone I love dearly couldn't make it tonight for whatever reason. And then that same thought made me realize that I made this game for that person and it wouldn't be right if I didn't tell you all about it."

Rindō was slowly entering the venue as he heard your voice on the speakers, stealthily slipping into the room so he didn't distract anyone from you.

He found a seat at the table nearest the exit and stared up at your form in partial confusion as he wondered who it was you were referring to.

"I make action games because my friend loves them. He would always whine to me about how the games he'd play were trash, the final boss wasn't worth his time, and how the hours he put into the game were hours he'd never get back. I didn't want him to feel that way anymore so I started my career in game development to appease him, to make him happy. I loved video games because of him, they became my passion because of him. And the game we published today..."

Your eyes searched the crowd, realizing the admiring faces and prying eyes as you pause between your sentences, looking for that person in the event they did show up. And when your eyes found his, you couldn't help the slow grin that played on your pretty lips.

"Was the last game I planned to make for him before I took time from developing video games to develop our relationship together. I wanted a game that would represent the growth and strength of our relationship, to show the world what two people are capable of when they work together, when they conquer something together, when they protect something so meaningful to them in the same way you protected me from that bully in middle school and the parent that didn't know how to be one. I made this video game for you, Haitani Rindō."

You watched him closely as his lips formed a small circular shape at your revelation, his eyes flickering admiration, love, adoration, and a frenzy of other overwhelmingly beautiful emotions. He smiled at you and you smiled back wider, the entire crowd looking over at him as the spotlight moved across the room to shine over him, his features highlighting in the pretty blue hues.

"Roppongi Revengers is for you, my love."

"I can't believe you made that game for me. I had a feeling the characters were based off the two of us by how they interacted, but I couldn't focus on it because the game was too enticing to pick it apart. (Name), I–"

You silenced his rambling with a chaste kiss, hoping he'd pull you back and kiss you again, but he stared at you silently, blankly, surprised.

"Oh... I'm sorry, I thought-"

He pulled you back against him and let his lips hover over yours as he spoke, "You thought right, my love."

And the spotlight hit your swaying forms on the dancefloor as you embraced each others lips passionately, arms falling over the others as you hugged each other tightly to you, the sounds of clapping and screams of excitement falling in deaf ears.

It was only you.

It was only Rindō.

And that's all you'd hoped for after fifteen years of making video games for your new boyfriend.

[pyroclastic727]

Is Amity autistic?

In the Owl House fandom, we hear a lot about how Luz is written to be ADHD. Now I would like to present the flipside: Amity is coded as autistic.

Here’s the breakdown.

Amity is touch-averse. “BuT aMiTy ToUcHeS LuZ aLL tHe TiMe” nice try. The key to autistic touch-aversion is only being okay with touch when she initiates it. And that totally matches up with Amity. See, Amity is really happy when she initiates touch with Luz. She’s also cool with it when Luz holds her hand after standing near her for enough time that Amity can predict an incoming touch. That’s because Amity consents to that touch and expects it.

But when other people touch her? She doesn’t take kindly to that. When Luz initially bumped into her at Covention, she snapped at her and degraded her. Even when she bumped into Luz in Enchanting Grom Fright, her initial instinct was to snap at Luz, since she didn’t expect to be touched. When Hooty touched Amity’s face without consent, she flipped out and beat him up. Not even Lilith beat Hooty up when he wrapped her up in his mucus-filled tube, but Amity gave Hooty the injuries we all wanted to see him with, because he breached her boundaries without her consent. Even as late as the last episode, Amity fell over when her face got close to Luz’s on the bleachers, because she didn’t expect it.

Amity stims. Okay, this one took me a while to catch, since most of the time, Amity is very controlled with her actions. This symptom isn’t very intense; her senses aren’t understimulated too often, and she really only does it when she’s really excited.

Mainly, when Luz offered to carry her. While she adorably scrambled for words, she also flapped her hands against her legs. At first I thought it was just a cute thing she did, but there’s more to it. She was so excited to be held by Luz that it showed up in her hands flapping...a common stim. With Amity feeling more comfortable around her new friends than the old ones, I wouldn’t be surprised to see more stimming in the future.

Amity always has The Mask as her expression. You know, the one with her eyes half-lidded, eyebrows raised, mouth slightly downturned. I also call it the Resting Blight Face, for...reasons.

At first I thought it was just a way to hide her true emotions, since her parents are assholes. But even though Luz makes her feel accepted, she keeps doing it. It’s more like...you know that feeling when you’re thinking really hard, or uncomfortable, or ashamed, or even just relaxed, and you can’t think of which expression to wear quickly enough, so you put on an unreadable one to tide people over? Apparently most people don’t do that, since allistic people tend to have expressions for those feelings, ones that arise naturally.

Another symptom of autism is having hard-to-read expressions, or being less expressive. In Amity’s case, it’s the fact that she doesn’t see a need to have an expression in calmer moments, so she just uses her usual expression.   

Amity hyperfixates. This has several facets, so I’ll break this down.

She initially hyperfixated on school. And that’s how she became top student. Amity Blight is who you would mistake for a “gifted student.” But make no mistake...she is not gifted, and gifted is a bullshit label used to overexert people and force them to keep school as their special interest for their entire lives (and I may have a bit of a vendetta against it). Anyways, we already know she’s a perfectionist. My theory is that Amity originally was hyperfocused on school--the Abominations track, to be exact--and that’s part of how she got so good. Then, her focus shifted, but the school expected her to keep being top student. Cue the perfectionism; she was no longer able to focus on school like she wanted to, but everyone expected her to, so she got insecure about it.

She hyperfixates on Azura, just like Luz did. Yeah, she keeps it secret from the world, for most of the time. But she definitely likes Azura a lot. I mean, she started to reconsider her opinion on Luz when Luz offered her an Azura book. She destroyed her jock career because she tried to use an Azura move in real-life Grudgby. Her interest in Azura is long-lived, starting about the time that her interest in school would have expired (which would explain why she stayed closeted). And we can’t ignore the fact that she sees Azura in Luz and is definitely enjoying the parallels between herself and her fictional counterpart. (Which might not be a coincidence, but that’s an entirely different theory).

She hyperfixates on Luz. Yes, part of this is a crush. But a lot of us have watched Amity’s personality go from alpha bitch to cutest little bean in the Boiling Isles, all thanks to Luz’s influence. Lumity is not a rivals-to-lovers speedrun due to bad writing, it’s due to Amity hyperfixating. She’s already extremely introspective, going so far as to keep a diary where she analyzes and makes sense of herself. It’s not a stretch to say that she identified the faults that kept her from Luz and worked hard to change those off-screen. 

Amity keeps a journal. To me, this seems like masking. You see, Amity is what people would consider to be high-functioning, since she can pass for allistic. But in order to do this, she has to put in significant effort on her part. See, when she does something that makes it so she doesn’t pass, she just sees it as a problem (since she probably doesn’t know about autism, and she passes well enough that she would totally be undiagnosed). Then she tries to fix the problem, in order to keep being perfect. 

Amity has awkward body language. Thanks to the journal and other ways of masking, you don’t see this early on. But once she feels comfortable enough around Luz to let her guard down...she completely forgets boundaries. To review: in episodes 15-17, she throws herself at Luz, holds her formal rival’s hand for 24.71 seconds, blushes every time she sees Luz, and loudly declares her thirsty thoughts about Luz in uniform before literally running away. While some of this can be seen as normal gal pal things or crush things...you’d think a repressed wlw like Amity would try very hard not to touch Luz, so as to avoid being outed. Or at least she would do less of that stuff, so as to respect Luz’s boundaries the way she wants her boundaries to be respected. But that’s not the case, since she straight-up misses a lot of social cues. And since she feels comfortable around Luz, she doesn’t feel the pressure to be so paranoid about the cues, and can be her awkward self. From her point of view, she probably sees it as being freed from her parents’ judgment.

Amity takes things literally, sometimes. Now, this doesn’t happen all the time, since she isn’t heavily affected by this autistic trait. But when Luz says “I’m picking up what you’re putting down” and Amity says “I’m not putting down anything” and looks down...she not only missed the conclusion Luz drew from her words, but also assumed a literal meaning from her words. I can’t come up with many other instances of this, mostly because this doesn’t happen often. I would assume that Amity missed these a lot early on, and learned how to mask/identify them.

Amity is easily upset when things don’t go as planned. Let’s review these. In the library, she gets really mad at Luz when they end up stitched to a book, and it takes Luz’s sweet personality to get Amity to loosen up and laugh over it. When she goes to practice magic, and Luz steals her wand and uses it to get her siblings kidnapped, Amity locks Luz in a cage and assumes that she will get badly injured if she tries to fix the problems she caused. When Luz comes to her school, she panics and focus on how that doesn’t change anything. When she burns Willow’s mind, she appears absolutely terrified of being punished, flinching and bracing for impact when Luz finds her near the memories, constantly trying to distract Luz as they work together to save Willow, and hiding behind Luz when she confronts the Inner Willow. When Luz asks her to join her in Grudgby, Amity doesn’t initially agree, instead taking much more of the episode to come to terms with her involvement in it.

Amity likes predictability. She’s not attached to routines, but she does like being able to expect things. If she makes a plan for the day, she expects that day to adhere to that plan, and she doesn’t respond well when it changes. When Luz comes to her school, she focus on how that doesn’t change anything...not how that would ruin things or complicate things. Whenever she gets involved in Luz’s shenanigans, she either gets angry, scared, or takes a while to accept it. In a broader sense, she takes a while to accept that Luz and her shenanigans are a permanent fixture in her life--sixteen episodes, to be exact.

Finally, it would make for some excellent representation. An ADHD Dominican-American bisexual protagonist is pretty groundbreaking. But an ADHD Dominican-American bisexual protagonist girl who dates an autistic wlw witch girl from another dimension is exactly the kind of intersectional representation you’d expect to see from an unrestricted Owl House crew.

...Now, this might just be me hardcore projecting. I’m a little scared to post this because I don’t know how much of this is me reading into imaginary things, or trying to convince myself that Amity is like me. Feel free to debate/disprove me or support me in the comments. 

[eveninglottie]

So I've been rereading ascendant and I have Thoughts.

Most people following me right now are probably here for my other stuff, but the first thing I ever wrote was ascendant, an incredibly long retelling of da:I that never actually got more than maybe 1/3 of the way through the plot of the game. In 2015 I wrote probably 300k words in the span of four months and I felt amazing for about that much time before I started being incredibly self conscious. I obsessively revised and cut and edited this fic over the next two years, trying to make it better so that more people would like it and read it and tell me they read it and liked it, so much so that by the time I finally gave up and focused on other things I kind of hated it? I had, through that revision, taught myself to overanalyze and pick apart and tighten and prune and basically reshape that fic into something I thought would be more palatable. At the time I gave excuses that I was just trying to improve, and I won't say the process didn't make me a better writer (although having not written in two years makes that a harder thing to be sure of), but the one thing I can't shake after reading the fic five years later is that it feels incredibly self-conscious. I can hear in my own writing the constant reshaping and streamlining and the gaps in my own language that I can feel aren't natural. It's a weird thing to come to terms with, especially now that I have dragon age on the brain again and I've been tiptoeing into brainstorming a complete rewrite, and I can't help but feel a little sad that this thing which was in many ways a cathartic outpouring of self indulgent love became so fraught in my own mind. The relationship between creation and consumption is so strange, and its one I used to be hyperfocused on. Maybe it's just the result of age (and medication, absolutely the medication) but I find myself lamenting the fact that I felt I had to go through so much work to ultimately be left with something I wish I had just left alone.

Getting older is weird (she says at the very young age of 31 lol). Do what you want you want, I guess, and remember at the end of the day that fic is about what you want.

[ackermans-freedom-inc]

I bring to you, on this fine thursday, some thirst ft. Mikasa that has been stuck in my head for way too long. Thank you to @anlian-aishang​ for letting me scream about this with you, for giving me the plot idea, and for freeing me from the Mika brainrot. 

18+ content, be responsible for yourself and respect my boundaries. 

Includes: Mikasa x f!reader, oral (receiving), sex while on the phone

Unavailable

It was hard to believe that a mere two weeks ago, amidst the mountain of tissues and a slightly damp pillow, your relationship had ended. How callously you were tossed aside, despite all the sacrifices, all the tough times, all the bullshit you put up with. This was your reward, the warnings of your mother that your naivety would get you into trouble never sounding truer. The only silver lining was that now, the day to day monotony of your schedule, with finals looming on the horizon kept you on track. Hyperfocused, and with more free time than ever.

As the lock clicked into place, you tripped in your haste to slip sneaker clad feet into the comfort of house slippers, rushing to the source of the smell that permeated the cozy apartment.

“ ‘Kasa! Two questions,” you yelled, rounding the corner, smiling when the familiar outline of your roommate came into view, “One, what are you making? It smells delicious! And two, can I have some?”

You gave her your best cheeky grin, a squeak leaving your lips when the back of a wooden spoon tapped the top of your head.

“Made your favourite. As if you didn’t realize it already.” Dark eyes met your own, a faint smile tugging at the corners of her somehow always glossy lips. “I packed some for lunch tomorrow too. You need to remember to take it with you in the morning.”

Your bear hug and enthusiastic nodding had her eyes rolling, waving off your words of gratitude with a reminder to go get washed up for dinner. Her attention turned back to the still bubbling contents of the pot, she didn’t fully realize what had happened until your footsteps faded to nothing down the hall. Tense, a shiver ran up her spine as hands that were usually cool and steady now shook as fingertips grazed her cheek where your lips left their lingering warmth.

What started out as a simple living arrangement quickly spiralled out of control. Somewhere between late night popcorn on the couch, shared cooking and cleaning duties, and having to call Mikasa into the shower when a particularly hairy spider showed its face behind the curtains, a spark of something unknown wormed its way into your heart.

What you never noticed was her lingering glances, downcast eyes focusing on picking at her carefully manicured nails whenever a date came to pick you up at the apartment. Or perhaps, you noticed, but never fully realized. You never realized the way she would always make time to have dinner with you, how sacred your weekly movie nights were to her, how she was always asleep on the couch, curled up in your favourite avocado patterned blanket when you got home late from a night out. You never realized. Right?

It’s true, you’ve never had to work so hard to stifle the grin that always seemed to be around when she was in the room. You never quite felt your heart skip a beat the same way when she would wrap an arm around your shoulder, palm gently pressing your head to lay across her shoulder, eyes never wavering from their focus on the flickering pictures on the screen. You took pride in the fact that you were different than the others in her life, able to see a side of her, with her usually perfectly brushed hair a mess after a particularly good afternoon nap, or catch her asleep, slumped over the kitchen table, pencil still in hand. Sometimes...just sometimes, when she worked out in the apartment, you would let yourself wonder what she would feel like under your touch. But this was normal of any roommate. It was only natural to feel this way towards someone you lived with. Right?

Your favourite pajamas pulled on, a striped pant and dinosaur pattern top clad you shook the thoughts from an already aching head. No use thinking such silly things. It’s not like she’d ever like you back. Right?

No sooner had you taken a seat at the table, and two piping hot bowls placed in front of you, did your phone start buzzing in your pocket. Scowling at the interruption to your favourite time of the day, your emotions only further darkened when your ex’s name flashed across the screen. An angry huff, and a harder than necessary smash of your fingers on the “decline” button followed by your phone being placed face down on the table pulled the atmosphere back from the tension that had somehow seeped into the room.

You met her eye for a moment, and quickly offered a sheepish grin, somehow feeling smaller under her gaze as you suddenly found the contents of your bowl very fascinating.

“What does he want?” she asked, not a single emotion betrayed by her voice.

“To talk. Something about fixing things. Seeing if we can try again.” You mumbled in reply, the tip of your fork disappearing as you swirled your food around with a shrug. “Nothing new.”

You look up when you feel her hand covering yours, a slight furrow in her brows making her look more serious than you’ve ever seen around you.

“Are you thinking about it?” her eyes are probing, “trying again?”

“With him?” you almost snort, head shaking. “No way. I’m done.”

“Good.” Her hand leaves yours, another pause before she tucks back in, “you’re better off here with me.”

The earlier tension from the phone call might have been expelled, but at the new development, your heart was anything but calm. Her words and actions swirling over and over in your head, your hands clammy and stomach churning. Barely tasting your favourite dish, you hastily finished up, offering a weak smile of thanks, washing and rinsing the bowl before excusing yourself to the safety of your room.

Should you be feeling this way? Guilt coursed through your body, breath catching in your throat. Were you allowed to feel this way towards her? She was your roommate. One of your closest friends. But could she be more? Would she want to be more?

Only weeks ago was she rubbing your back as you sobbed into her shoulder. Would she be offended at your feelings? Swallowing past the lump, your head was once again buried in the pillow, heart calling out for her, head cursing you for the ill-timed revelation.

Sometime later, two soft knocks roused you, the door clicking open in response to your acknowledgement.

“You forgot your phone out there.”

You felt the bed dip, tensing for a second as you felt her lay a gentle hand over your head, carding through your locks.

“I’m sorry if I upset you. It just that - you don’t need him, and he wasn’t good enough for you anyway.” She spoke softly, hands stilling as you lifted your head before sitting up, knees pulled close to your chest.  

“I hated the look that he put into your eyes when everything was made to be your fault. I hated how he played with your kindness, how he never appreciated you for a moment. I hated that he broke your heart when he never deserved it.” She shifted, turning towards you as she spoke, eyes shining. “But if what you want is to try again, I support you. Always.”  

Mikasa thought she was strong. And indeed she was, but as she watched your face crumple and tears start gathering in your eyes, she felt her heart drop. She would forever be weak for you. Your disarming smile, blind optimism, carefree nature, and ability to somehow see the light in any situation was what bound her to you, and if she were able to stay by your side, she would be content, even if she would never receive the love you so freely gave to those undeserving.

“No.” you choked out, wiping at your cheeks, “stop it.”

Your heart pounded against your ribs, but there was no going back.

“I couldn’t care less about him Mika. I mean it. I don’t want your support to be with him, or anyone else because…I – I…”

The words caught, unsaid, and you saw the slightest bit of confusion on her face when your hands caught her cheeks, pulling yourself close, willing your shaky breath to still as your lips met hers.

“The one I want to try anything with is you.”

Sitting back onto your heels, you waited. For a second, you thought you had gravely misjudged the situation, apologies bubbling forth when you were suddenly rendered breathless, body bouncing against the mattress, Mikasa’s hair framing both your faces as she took in your wide-eyed gaze.

“Tell me again.”

“I want – I want to try with you. I like yo- mmf!”

Your words never left. As if they once they were said, there would be a chance of taking them back. It was her who initiated it this time, frame covering yours as her nose brushed yours, movements losing their hesitation once your lips met once more. Featherlight caress quickly turned urgent, desperate for a taste of you, a sigh falling from her lips when your tongue met hers.

You shared a soft hum when her hands cupped your cheeks, turning your face, angling for better access. Your mind was in a haze, the only thing you knew for sure was the way she felt, the way she tasted, and the warmth that had spread all the way to your toes.

Your lungs burned, but you didn’t want to pull away. You didn’t need oxygen if it meant having to stop, but as your arms wrapped around her waist, it was she who broke the kiss. You were both breathing heavily, lips buzzing, eyes glassy with love and desire.

Already seeing the question written all over her face, you pulled her back down. “Don’t stop. Please.”

How could she refuse you, when you had been plaguing her mind for more nights than she could remember? She traced down your jaw with soft kisses, smiling into your skin when you tilted your head to give her better access, baring your neck as hands grabbed at the fabric of her shirt.

Her cool hand snaking under your shirt had you whimpering, the cold touch somehow setting your body further ablaze, soft mewls of her name, and chants of “yes yes yes” as fingers trekked upwards. In tandem did you shudder when her hand reached where you desperately needed it, your sigh mingling with her sound of surprise of finding you bare under the shirt.

Her movements stopped when you shuffled, frozen as you sat up slightly. If either of you were unsure about the other’s intentions, all doubts were dashed when your shirt hit the carpeted floor, a hand on the back of her neck gently pulling her down once more.

Soon enough, your arms lay useless by your head, head thrown back as your body arched further into her, desperate for more. Her tongue against your buds, occasional harsh suck made you arch beautifully into her embrace even as proof of her claim blossomed on your skin.

You were like a wanderer in the desert, having found your salvation in her every touch, every caress, imbued with words and meaning that only you could understand. I want you. I love you. The more she gave, the more you wanted. As your hand came to dance over her bare skin, fingers twisting at the hem of her shirt, she paused, looking up over your heaving breasts with a smile.

“Next time.” Her words were filled with promise, “Tonight, I’m making sure you forget all about him.”

Gentle fingers hooked at the waistband of your bottoms, a light tug as she waited for your permission. You nodded, and heat followed where her fingers trailed down your thighs, your shirt gaining a companion on the floor.

You propped yourself up onto your elbows, groaning at the sight of her between your legs, the adoration and lust clear in her eyes as she moaned softly at the sight of you, slick covered folds dripping onto the sheets below.

Boneless before she even touched you, the support of the mattress was once again the only one you had. Her tongue lapped at you, a strangled cry catching in your throat, turning into a gasp and desperate pant of “Mi-mika, more”.

Hands found their way into her silken locks, and you swore you felt her smile before your brain once against froze when her lips sealed around your clit, sucking softly as her tongue flicked against you in a way that made stars fill the vision behind your tightly screwed eyelids. Your whines got more desperate, rutting of your hips, the shaking in your thighs signalling the overwhelming need to cum as she traced her name against you, time and time again. Mumbling about how good you tasted in between her gulps of air.

The coil was growing tighter in your stomach, but you didn’t want it to end. Your teeth were chattering before a sigh and another whine asked her to do something, anything to push you over the edge.

Two fingers swirled at your soaked core, gathering, spreading, teasing as you begged for it. “Please” repeated so many times it no longer sounded like a word. As her fingers pressed against you, there was a moment where your breath once again hitched, pressure giving way to mind numbing pleasure, a wordless scream when she almost immediately found that spot that made your body arch so beautifully. Your end was advancing quickly, blood rushing past your ears muffling the sound that Mikasa didn’t miss.

Your phone was ringing once more, and when his name appeared once more, a dark thought crossed her mind. She finally had you, finally had you like this. She was not about to let him interfere. Not anymore.

Ignoring the tingling of her lips, she answered in your stead.

“Hello? Ah, yes. She’s right here. Hold on.”

Your phone bounced on the bed beside your head, and before you could process and make any conscious effort to muffle your sounds, or berate her for ruining your orgasm, she was right where she left off.

Two fingers hooked inside you repeatedly, pads of her fingers rubbing against you, tongue now sloppily kissing and licking at you, anything to get you to make more of those sounds that were no doubt going through loud and clear over the telephone line.

Teeth dragged uselessly against your lip, futile attempts to stave off your gasps as you could hear the confusion in his voice, calling your name. But you never answered. How could you when someone else was calling for you too, demanding your full attention, your name now the pattern she traced over and over again.

At the top of the precipice she drove you to, you teetered. There was no care in the world, no spare thought for your ex, nothing save for the name of the one who held the only thing you wanted in her perfectly manicured hands.

She knew what you wanted, and with a last, finally satisfied grin, one last curl of her fingers and a harsh suck pushed you over, feeling your walls convulse around her soaked fingers, her name the only thing you were capable of screaming.

A hasty wipe of her mouth with the back of a hand, your phone was snatched back, saccharine voice betrayed by her triumphant mocking tone.

“As you can tell…she’s busy.”

Taglist: @puredivinity @anlian-aishang @alrightberries @raabzyjan @jean-does-not-have-a-horseface @horseanon--simpforall @daenerysdracarys @hiqhkey @messymanifestation @dontusethisproduct @annexerca @levisimmp​ pls let me know if you want to be added or taken off! 

[flaminghelldancer]

Bnha manga chapters 367-374 review

Sorry, I've been hyperfocused on Tiktok and writing, so I completely forgot about the manga ^_^U This is a long one.

Spoilers from the last manga chapter!

I don't know if it's just me but with all the hype built around the second holder's quirk I expected something different. Like, it's great, very convenient and combines well with the other quirks but I thought it would be a different kind of quirk? Like a not-combat oriented one or one more on the defensive side.

Now, to the Spinner battle. It's pretty obvious that it's a statement about discrimination but also comes to show the problem with representatives. The followers don't actually know their leader, what they know is the image that they've been given of them and that image may not correspond with how they actually are. Besides, even if they were like that, they can became power crazy and I think this is what they are showing with Spinner being so affected by having been given more quirks, aka power. The followers also don't really realize their leader is someone else's subordinate, and that that other person, AfO in this case, has a very different goal. There is also a say on how when people blindly follow someone they excuse or ignore when they show their bad side, and this is reinforced by the people that manipulate the situation to fit their narrative.

Then, we have another reminder that victims aren't always heroes or always villains just because they are victims. That depends on each case, because each person is different and so is their trajectory. With Spinner and Shouji, the differenciating factor was receiving kindness at some point, but I feel like that is more of a example than "this is why some are heroes and some villains". I love that they keep going "right idea, wrong execution" and showing that violence generates more violence, but then they also show that can be stopped if given enough thought. The trend of people that aren't the MC giving shounen protagonist talks is great and the videogame and movie references are a nice touch to the story.

About Kurogiri, they've already said that high-end nomus keep some of their personality like how Hood was obsessed with fighting, but with Kurogiri it feels like either whatever is left of Oboro is been brainwashed or he actually started caring for Tomura after being his caregiver for so long.

Love random people standing up to injustice even if it's just voicing their thoughts. Hope the weather woman is okay by the end of the story.

On that note, please let Monoma be okay. I'm guessing they are trying to bring all the fights together and that's going to be chaos, and he'll end up badly if he copies Dabi's quirk >.<

I think what I said about Dabi's defeat being the trigger for Toga to use Twice's blood was right, but we'll see. All we know now is that Tsuyu may be out of combat because of what that one Twice is holding (a part of her googles). I'm worried for Uraraka.

Finally, they are questioning how Dabi is still going too much, so my theory about the doctor doing more than healing him in those three years he was in a comma may become a real thing. Either that or AfO gave him some sort of endurance quirk he doesn't know about. I just hope he isn't half nomu T.T