#i feel so disgusted rn
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had an explicit blog jumpscare why can't they leave me alone
#like i'm clearly stating time and time again i'm not wanting any of that gross shit#i legit had to make sure i blocked and reported it omfg#so fucking gross man#i feel so disgusted rn#sorry for a negative post y'all#small vent#thixx's thoughts
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The most frustrating part of this isn’t even Trump, look I’ve known he’s fucking sucked for years now. The absolutely gut wrenching part is having to come face to face with the fact that a huge section of the country I live in doesn’t give a shit about any of the values and things I hold dear. I’m upset with this country, with the people.
#el rambles#us elections#us election#us politics#I feel so disgusting rn#the biggest pit in my stomach#and the worst part is if he wins it’s not like we can debate it#I’m not gonna pull a Trump and argue with the results#it just sucks that so many ppl in our country would do this
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I love the idea that, whenever a Cybertronian space-faring vessel lands or docks within a predominantly non-Cybertronian space station or port, that it's required that they either confirm or deny whether their vessel is sentient or not before being permitted to land.
1. For proper accommodation and clarification, along with the chance for communication between the vessel and crews working the station/port.
2. Because there has been... incidents... incidents that have led to the requirement of the above reasons.
#an irate dreadnought with a brain and very big feelings could wreak all sorts of havoc on an unprepared station unfortunately#also. itd be a bit shocking to be just some guy working the fuel station. idly complimenting a shiny cruiser only for it to say 'thanks <3'#transformers#maccadam#tf idw#tf worldbuilding#???#i mean. yeah. its technically world building. we dont see much of that kinda stuff#but im sure as hell thinking about it rn#i love wacky sci fi worldbuilding. theres not enough of it on a broader galactic scale in tf sometimes#like. they mention other aliens and hubs in a few continuities i think. but then they only do so much with it#outside of crossovers ig#idk. i just like thinking of how beings other than humans perceive cybertronians and the colonists#like. they're new to humans. usually. but theyve had other alien neighbors for millions of years#transformers surely are quite talked about on a broader galactic scale. and obv taken into consideration either for good or bad#they're nigh immortal. they're constantly fighting each other and dying. they're peacekeepers. they're warlords. they're big. they're small#they're fucking weird. and somehow end up all over the place#they hate your kind. they love your kind. they think you're disgusting. they're offering to be your car#how many citizens of their galaxy nervously attempt to politely ask a vehicle if its alive or not on a daily bases in popular hubs/stations#its so funny to me#also. thinking about fic stuff relating to idw1. and like. all the background aliens and their factions fascinate me a bit. its fun inspo#mtmte#lost light#nearly forgot those. since other aliens and factions are featured in them a bit#slowly getting through robots in disguise rn. and all the nail stuff got me thinking about neutrals finding homes amongst other aliens#also like. some of the darker stuff thats mentioned about cybertronians being sold or indentured. like. hows that viewed broadly?
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adult sonic fans will see a mature teenager and think "that's an adult" like wow way to be a Fucking Creep
#sonic the hedgehog#very heated rn#heard someone say dark era sonic feels like a 30 year old#like oh my GOD shut up. the absolute leap in logic#adult sonic fans love pretending sonic is An Adult Actually#and they will leap SO FAR to justify it#its disgusting honestly#none of these people know shit about teenagers#and honestly! good! none of them should be around teens anyway with the gross shit they do and say#god. whatever. i love being normal#charmaaallow
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formula one. the billionare boys club.
#formula 1#somehow i am still disappointed by the state of this sport#i miss seb so much rn#f1#christian horner#lando norris#lance stroll#the fact there is legitimate evidence and redbull instead suspended the women who reported horner is so disgusting#and the fact that drivers are content to say that its just noise#that they feel bad for horner#that he’s such a lovely guy who doesn’t deserve this is so fucking disgusting#daniel ricciardo#alex albon#and somehow alex was the most disappointing because i didn’t expect it#it’s a sport that is so heavily embedded in patriarchal values that i could pick ten drivers to say that and id never guess alex :(#they’ve set a precedent for men in motorsports that is a reversal of their we race as one message and its a horrific precedent to set#because it shows that team’s principals and the likes are given free passes for evidenced harassment in the workplace#whilst susie wolff and hannah etc face continual backlash for their presence#you didn’t just let horner keep his job-you let everyone in motorsports know how easy it is to get away with harassment#nico hulkenberg
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starting off the day with dreams by the cranberries and ending it with i love you, i'm sorry by gracie abrams this is a cateogry 5 'in my head about this crush' situation
#he is changing my lifeeeee this is disgusting i can't think about anything ELSE#i don't know how he feels i am blowing up i need to talk to him about it but i'm. screaming crying throwing up at the prospect#my health anxiety is at an all time low and now there's so much space in my head and he is. filling it up. with his floofy fucking hair#feeling sooooo bisexual rn#ola.txt
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i don't want to start the new year with this body
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uh. vent art. or something. losing yourself and losing everyone who you cared about as a result
#inanimate insanity#inanimate insanity invitational#ii#ii 2#ii 3#inanimate insanity cabby#. that's it#i'm. so so exhausted.#i feel like i'm actually going to throw up from how disgusted i am with myself#of course they wouldn't want to be friends w/me of course they don't like talking to me anymore#i am too broken to even be a good friend#hell even my best friend is leaving my side lately#i don't want to go back. i don't want to see them again tomorrow. i don't want to.#i don't want to feel like i'm insignificant i was doing so good why does it hurt why is it hurting now#i don't want to feel like death is the only solution i don't want to i don't want to be alone i don't want to be forgotten#i don't want to be unloved just because i can't fix myself anymore#i don't have anything to offer anymore i'm so so sorry i wish i did i wish i was still happy and healing#i wish i was i wish i was im sorry i can't.#sigh. well can't do much about it now anyway. uh yeah cabby is my mood rn. also talking about irl friends here.#god this was so bad i need to die rn#cw vent#cw sui mention#i guess#mhm. i think i need a therapist
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#Okay jokes aside today's situation has been very distressing.#I'm very sorry to hear so many people I followed and looked up to hold such strong feelings against what I said–#in a way that I seem to understand goes way beyond the last post I published.#Feeling like deleting all my blogs rn. I need to sleep over this.#If my blog evoked such great sentiments of hatred and disgust: I'm genuinely sorry.#I know you aren't going to read this but know it was never my intention#Maybe it's really for the best if I deactivate#Again‚ I'm truly sorry.
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Update 2: the germaphobia didn't win bc he sneezed so hard he cried kinda and I can't not hug the people I like when there's tears so that's where we're at now lmao I'm literally so fucked but at least I'm not doing anything the next week 😭 checked him over since caution has been thrown to the wind, dude for sure has the flu but I'm hoping I can dodge it bc I got vaccinated so fingers crossed there. Ran out of tissues, so he's resorted to napkins and his jacket which isn't nearly as hot irl as it is in fic, but this is what it's come to 😔 also he's gone through three more masks and I'm lowkey scared he's gonna run out of those too 😭😭
#kinda snz again#how am i supposed to tag this actually#obs? is that what people call it??#idk#anyway#I'm not actually that worried about runn out of masks bc we have so fucking many and also i bring my own#i am worried about him getting me sick tho but it seems unavoidable at this point 😔#i feel so bad for him but I'm still disgusted ngl#dude has a hell of a fever like you hate to see it#had to go sit in the back where we put the patients so he could lay down for a bit and try to nap#bro literally sounds worse and worse as the hours go by it's fucking horrific#i fr feel like a mom rn patting this dude's back and getting him shit smh#like I'm the mom friend always so it tracks but doing vaguely medical things @ someone who has a higher scope than me is wild lmao#also for the record my partner isn't antivax he just planned on getting them closer to the end of the month#that's not working out so well for him now but it's not like he wasn't gonna get them at all so there's that at least lmao#partner posting
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cc shopping after exams why not? 💀
whats this timing man
#HIT THE BIG FAT 70 GB that is a disgusting amount of cc URGHHH#BUILD BUY CAS AND POSES IM ADDICTED THATS NOT GOOD 💀#felt like cc shopping yesterday i want to redo my townie makeovers#idk or do some building! i am in any mood apart from gameplay#exams are over mine were all at the start but there are still reports#so idk when renee will be back#no motivation to post the legacy rn#ill be honest sometimes it feels like a chore to come up with posts#dont get me wrong i love my sims and my legacy/story i love posting#but its coming up with ideas and how to show them that gets to me#maybe finishing my reports will open my mind and get ideas back#rambles#non sims
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#hhhrmdbdhdgjdvd why do I feel so disgusting and ugly and tired#I literally just washed my hair yesterday so that’s not even it!#I guess my skin is bad rn (thanks to me picking at it :^)#and I’ve been angsting about my weight more#and also just#life#but yeah#I have a thing tonight that I do wanna do but also don’t want to go out in public for#I know it will be good and good for me#bleughhh#I need to crawl into a hole and be a gross creachur for a while
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I love that the “There’s only one bed” trope for Symweaver would just be a normal day for them that they don’t even think twice about it. They’d sleep in each other’s beds in their dorm as students whenever they felt like it and still do the same on the Arcology. They’re at complete ease in each other’s presence that they never really thought to make it a big deal
The only differences are that Niran cuddles her a lot more because he likes how it’s a different vibe to intentionally snuggle somewhere away from home, and Satya studies his face a lot more because the environment isn’t the same and it’s comforting that he’s a universal constant to her
#symmetra#lifeweaver#symweaver#satya vaswani#niran pruksamanee#overwatch#Overwatch 2#she was probably uneasy about sleeping at the Arcology for a long time and would just constantly stare at him so he knew she was still wary#and he’d be thrilled the second he noticed she didn’t need to watch him anymore because she was so used to being there#she just vibes near him unless he asks if they can snug#he usually doesn’t sleep until ungodly hours but he does enjoy coming to bed and seeing satya sleeping there already#it makes him adore her even more every single time#he hates going to bed by himself so as long as he knows she’s in the room somewhere even if it’s not the same bed he feels comfortable#also I think Satya should be the hot one and he leeches off of her warmth because it’s funny that way#she likes how cool he feels so she doesn’t mind him clinging to her when they cuddle#I bet they’re disgusting to be around because they won’t get up if you accidentally walk in on them#Suraj is probably their number one hater from anytime he walked in on them being grossly lovey dovey at any given moment#I’m tired and laying in a hotel room at an anime con rn so I’m having eepy cozy thoughts rn
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Ppl who pray upon others downfalls are honestly the biggest red flags like you WANT SOMEONE TO DO HORRIBLE THINGS?!
Plus ppl who get excited over a big creator being exposed (usually as being a predator) because they “now have a reason to justify why they don’t like them” are genuinely disgusting LIKE WHY ARE YOU HAPPY OVER THE FACT THAT A KID WAS GR00M3D SO YOU CAN JUSTIFY WHY YOU DIDNT LIKE A CERTAIN CREATOR?!
#pls let this reach the right audience#i hate ppl#angry rant#nsfvv ≠ pdf/gooner#sorry for tagging this with every post I just want to get the point across#ppl are gross#ppl are genuinely so fvcked up#rant#i feel angry inside rn#i hate yall#people are disgusting#i hate people
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I hate how I can sit there, get all sappy and cry and then moments later, just. wipe the tears away and then get,,, mad at myself for feeling like that, or disgusted. why do I do this :T
#post:vent#might delete later#like. its not one of those things where i can shake off that anger/disgust.#its a visceral feeling. and it sucks. i just hate how it makes me belittle myself. its such an overwhelming feeling too#so i have to just get through it and wait for the suffocation to subside#anyways. getting thru a little ol weep rn. will prolly end up deleting this in the post-cry rage. or you and i can forget this happened-#-and itll get buried deep into the depths of my post. where u can only find it if u search hard enough (or search post:vent lmao)#yapping
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i left a bowl of soup on my desk two weeks ago and forgot about it for one day. and it has been growing slowly moldy. it is terrifying. i am so scared of it. i am so scared and i need to get rid of it because it is getting so bad and there's like at least four different types of mold on it and at least one i don't even recognize but i'm just so fucking terrified to touch it or even get close to it guys i need help what do i do i am honestly so terrified and i am starting to get scared to be in my room and i feel like i kind of can't breathe in here which is not really good and also i am such a shitty roommate but i am just so scared i cannot emphasize how fucking terrified i am
#boink#ocd#i keep saying ill deal with it#and then every time i look at it im like shit#its mold#fucking#its fucking mold#and then i leave it#and then obviously leaving it makes it get worse#to the point where like this thing is actually probably becoming a biohazard#what the fuck do i do with it#i am the disgusting person you hear about#but im starting to literally avoid my room because im so scared of the mold radiation or whatever the fuck#i feel like its touched everything#im scared to sleep in my room tognith#genuinely if anyone has any ideas for how to deal with this rn#like ig just suck it up and fucking deal with it#but guys i do not think the cbt worked well enough for me to manage that rn#like if anyone with ocd has ideas for how to minimize the obsession and the fear so i can just get it over with#like anything i can do in the moment idk#i feel not well and even though i literally know that its not related i just keep connecting everything to this fucking contaminant#and at this point who knows honsetly that actually could be the case#because i have fucking problems and i let it get out of hand#im kind of losing it
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