#i feel so bad for jeongguk so much
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kookjinnies · 2 months ago
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crazy day to be on army twitter
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helenazbmrskai · 4 months ago
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Dark Office Romance (m)
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Title [Dark Office Romance]
Pairing [Yandere Boss! Jeongguk x Reader]
Genre [Yandere Au, Office Au, Romance, Smut]
Summary [The company you work for is shady, sexist and full of men who think they could do anything. After Jeongguk's assistant quits you attend a meeting in her stead and you realise just how rotten these men are. You decide to quit and you have a thing or two to tell to your boss but what you didn't expect is for him to turn this around on you.]
Words [5,6k]
Rating [+18]
Warnings [Sexual harassment in the workplace, sexism, bad working environment, yandere behaviour, obsession, mental disorder, sexual content: rough handling, forced kiss, consensual unprotected sex, marking/biting, first times, take away virginities, oral (female receiving), creampies]
A/N: This fic has heavy themes so read it with caution!
Masterlist //
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“Did you hear what happened today at the meeting?” A person talked in a hushed voice to another. Hiding in one of the stalls you could hear every whispering word between the ladies.
“Of course! There’s not a single soul who hasn’t heard. I don’t think I would be able to live through such humiliation. I hate this company, it’s so strict and harmful to the employees that I want to quit soon.”
You take a deep breath with your forehead pushed against the cold wall. Tears are wetting your eyelashes and your nose is clogged but you stopped crying in fear of someone hearing you. At least no one sees you in tears after what happened. You managed to put up a brave face that time. You felt more angry than hurt at that time but look at you now breaking down in the women's washroom like a fool.
“Yes, I agree. I hate that men can do anything. I fear coming to work every day, but I still think it was too much. Y/N is a diligent girl, and she didn’t deserve to have that kind of treatment right in front of our CEO. That bastard didn’t even try to stop it.”
“Shh. We’re still inside the building if someone overhears you talk about the CEO like that we will be in big trouble.”
“You’re right. Let’s go back to work.” The voices fade away until you hear the door close again behind your coworkers. You exit the stall when the coast is clear. However, when you see yourself in the mirror’s reflection you want to cry again. You look miserable with your mascara streaming down your face. You breathe in and out slowly until you’re able to calm down. You don’t have more time to waste you need to get your act together at least for when you’re back alone in your apartment. You can cry all night and curse your boss and everyone involved in today’s incident with a tube of ice cream and a six-pack of cold beer. Steeling your nerves you fix your make-up and get back to your duties. You finish your report and get everything in order. You don’t even get up to get lunch like everybody else as you power through it with an energy drink in you. If you went to the cafeteria you would get more of those pitiful glances and you don’t have it in you to answer their questions about how you’re feeling.
You know they don’t mean anything bad about it but it’s undoubtedly a thing that crosses everyone’s mind. Thank goodness it wasn’t me. It’s not wrong to feel this way before this happened there were times when you felt the same way, it’s just how things in this company work. You get humiliated and the next day someone takes your place.
Today it was your turn. It was bad enough that the CEO asked for you. The person who was responsible for helping him out during the cabinet meeting with the shareholders suddenly quit and you were tasked with helping with operating the slideshow and making notes.
This was your first time attending one of those meetings and after it was over you had a strong desire to quit as well.
No wonder she left in tears last week as she gave in her resignation letter you didn’t know what was happening inside those meetings. There was only one time you caught her crying in the bathroom just like you did now. You tried to ask what was wrong but she never told you.
You’re unsure how she was able to endure it for this long. Jeongguk’s assistant receives the most salary inside the company but for a while the seat was vacant and you were new to the company so you had no idea what was going on. Why did his assistants quit so quickly? You remember talking to her she was excited to get this opportunity she shared that her family is in a tough situation and the pay is good to get themselves back on their feet. Now you have a rough idea. At first, everything seemed normal.
You took your place standing next to Jeongguk and the meeting began when the participants sat down. They were all men. You held back at first when they touched your butt as you were passing around documents. You even ignored their sexist comments but enough was enough. One of the men squeezed your butt and whistled when the meeting was about to be over. You looked over to Jeongguk he looked straight into your eyes but didn’t do anything. You said that you would report this to HR as a case of sexual assault if he tried to do it again, now you were angry about how everyone treated you like a piece of meat. The man got angry and poured hot coffee over you.
Jeongguk ended the meeting and you stormed out.
He never tried to stop anything or protect you. He just watched it all play out as if he was watching a movie. This was the most humiliating experience you have had in your entire life.
There are other jobs out there. Maybe not paying this much but at least they treat you like a human being. A small mistake is enough and you get blamed. You have to come to work even on the weekends sometimes to finish writing your reports. Everyone is walking around eggshells. Waking up each morning with a knot in your stomach that you need to take digestive medicine regularly. You won’t tolerate any of this even if it will cost you this job or even better you’re going to quit yourself.
You push these hateful thoughts into the back of your mind so you can pull through the day. The first month you started to work here you thought it would pass but things didn’t get better over time. It just became worse but you didn’t want to be a girl who quit when things get difficult but even you know there’s a difference between not giving up and being foolish. Today you felt like the biggest fool out there.
They say life is beautiful.
You don’t remember the last time you felt happy. You keep working without enjoying life. You don’t have a boyfriend and you rarely talk to your family due to issues. You have lost a few friends as well because of the workload. You think about all the cancelled plans.
Although, enough is enough. This is the time you decide to let go. You’re going to tell him your opinion after you hand in your report at the end of the day. You even write your resignation letter. He will regret it. You’re bright and a good employee. It’s his loss if he lets you go.
You said that but you get nervous once you stand in front of his office you won’t change your mind on the subject you just need to find some courage again. You’re going to do what no one in the company dares to do. Everyone is scared of him the only reason that people don’t swarm him with letters of resignation every day is because it takes a lot of courage to see him directly. Everyone is afraid of him. Bad rumours are circulating about him saying that he’s mental. He has weird fixations and someone even told you that his parents regularly went to a psychologist with him when he was little. You don’t know if anything is true. You’ve never seen his parents visit him or even call him once. He never smiles or talks about himself not that you spent that much time alone with him. You only see him in regular monthly meetings otherwise everyone tries to avoid him inside the company the only exception is when you hand in important documents that you have to see him directly but that doesn’t consist of much as he just takes it and you leave.
You knock first then enter when he gives you the green light.
He looks hellishly good-looking in that black suit and perfectly styled hair, like the devil. He’s reading something but stops what he’s doing and looks up at you when you stop right in front of his desk. You hand him your report and he receives it without a single thank you or in fact, he’s not saying anything. You take in a calming breath before you speak.
This is your cue to leave but you stay rooted. Reliving that humiliation and mistreatment over the year that you’ve been working here whilst looking into his dark brown eyes helps you to finally find the courage to speak.
“This is my resignation but there’s something I would like to tell you before I leave.” You take a deep breath before you lock with his dark gaze again. You’re still furious and hurt. His soulless eyes are staring at you intensely as if he’s seeing you for the first time.
“I’ve never been through such a humiliating experience in my entire life. I wanted to hold on and not give up this job but I can’t do this anymore. I had enough of the mistreatment I received as a woman. Do you even consider me as a human? Groping my ass and making sexual jokes if the men that work here think that it’s okay to do that then I don’t want to work here anymore. The CEO should protect its people yet you looked into my eyes and did nothing to stop it. Are you a psychopath? Do you have feelings at all? I wonder if there’s anyone left in hell seeing as you are here making my life a living hell.” You want to say more but words get stuck in your throat as his expression changes.
Once you’re done unleashing your anger Jeongguk stands up from his chair and gets close to you. Real close. You step back until your back is against the wall your heart is hammering away in your chest afraid of what he will do. He closes up on you with a straight face his gaze is unreadable as he presses you against the wall. His face is really close and you close your eyes waiting for something. Is he going to slap you? If he was going to shout he could do that from his seat just fine. You wait for your punishment but it doesn’t come in the form you expected it to be.
He slams his lips against yours taking your breath away. Your eyes pop open wide as you see his face up close. You could see his closed eyelids ending in long eyelashes he breaths hard against your face. His expression is weird like he’s in pain while kissing you.
You push him away harshly unsure how to handle this situation. His gaze is intense as he looks at you. It’s crazy how his usually unexpressive eyes show such impulsive desire in them. He looked dangerous before but now it feels like you’re caught up in a trap.
Maybe there’s some truth in the rumours. You need to get out of here.
“Where are you going?” Jeongguk grabs your wrist before you can bolt for the door. Your face contorts in pain and fear instead of the previous alluring expression you had and he dislikes it. His hand is crushing your wrist as he pulls you back against him keeping you in place.
He saw that expression enough times to be boring but when you said all those things your eyes were fiery. You looked angry, hurt and confident. Defiant. He liked that expression so much that his whole body got covered in goosebumps. He felt the impulse to kiss you maybe do more. This is the first time someone told him off. Did not cower in fear even his own parents feared him. In life there’s nothing that Jeongguk didn’t get if he wished for it it was already his. His every wish and whim was granted. His parents never cared for him he could tell from a young age. He was never like the kids his age. They got him everything so they wouldn’t have to pay attention to him and now that he had his company to run there wasn’t a single wish of his that was unheard, except for one, he wanted to get excited. Sometimes expensive things did the trick then he started collecting beautiful things but his excitement never stayed for long. He got bored of anything he possessed quickly. You could be another whim for all he cares but he feels that you will be different. You’re treating him differently and he wants to explore all your expressions. Now he decided to have you. You can’t just get away if he needs to use force he will do it. You piqued his interest so you need to pay the price. He sees you in a new light.
“I want to go home.” Your face twists as his fingers tighten around your hand. It’s past the point where you’re sure it will bruise tomorrow. His wild expression is activating your fight or flight reflexes. It feels like he’s far away before he focuses back on your face.
“Do you think you can get away with what you said?” There’s something crazy in his eyes. You can’t explain it but it feels like you’re onto something far more dangerous than just getting fired.
He’s not gentle at all as he handles you.
“What will you do? Kill me?” You spit it out without a second thought but you’re just trying to mask how terrified you feel. Trying to survive you realise quickly that you won’t get out if you show that you’re scared of him. You need to find out what he wants from you.
“No. I won’t kill you. I’m going to keep you.” His finger gently clasps around a few strands of your hair pulls the tips over to his mouth to kiss it and takes a huge perverted sniff smelling your shampoo. He doesn’t pull on your hair thankfully and when your expression changes his attitude changes as well. He’s more gentle as he touches you.
“Bold of you to think I would want to do anything with you after what I had to endure at this company.” You pull away pretending to be disgusted. While his careful touch was ominous you can’t deny how your heart started to beat faster. His face changes minute by minute and you can’t predict what he will do next. One time he’s docile and the next he’s aggressive. Your heart tries to jump out of your chest as you wait for his next moves.
“I can take care of them. The ones who humiliated you I can get rid of them. Make sure that no one will lay a finger on you at the company ever again. All you need to do is to indulge me.” He caresses the side of your face as he speaks his mouth forms a small smile when you don’t push him away.
“I don’t believe you. If you stop finding me interesting you will just discard me in the end. I won’t play your games.” He might give you momentarily power but you know that he could take it back anytime.
“Discard you? No baby, I’m going to use you until there’s nothing left of you. Once I get obsessed with something I won’t lose interest until there’s nothing left to obsess over.” It’s true he discards things that are broken by him. If he doesn’t like something anymore he destroys them.
A man like him obsessing over you. No wonder he doesn’t have a girlfriend. A handsome man only remains single for a long time if there’s something wrong with him and he clearly has a few loose screws.
“Okay.” You must be crazy to agree too.
Jeongguk kisses you again and this time you don’t push him away. You twist your fingers into his hair deepening the kiss. You’re kissing the infamous devil it feels thrilling how his hands pull you to him possessively. Courage saved your life many times but this time it feels like you’re going to hell.
It feels so wrong that it feels so good.
His lips map out the curve of your neck his body flush against yours. He picks you up and pushes you against the wall his arm muscles flex as he holds your weight up with ease. Your legs curl around his small waist to balance. With the new position, your skirt rode up your thighs until the fabric was bunched around your waist.
Things are escalating fast but you don’t try to stop him. You will let the flames engulf you.
It’s only your panties that separate you from the pleasure as he rubs his cock into you.
He’s going to be big you can tell by feeling the outline.
Your hands wrap around his neck and his hands wrap around your torso to lift you off the wall and place you on his desk. Jeongguk spreads your legs with his fingers placing them on his shoulders as he hovers over you. The position is embarrassing you feel open and spread out on his desk.  The pens and binders dig into your back but it all fades to the background. Anyone could just come in and see you but you remember that normally no one dares to come to his office unless it’s unavoidably necessary.
Even if someone came in they wouldn’t dare to say anything with the CEO’s notorious reputation.
He rubs his nose around your clothed slit taking huge whiffs of air as he’s committing your smell into his memory. It’s dirty but arousing. His nose does a good job at rubbing your clit eliciting moans from you.
“Stop teasing me.” Jeongguk could read your frustrated expression so he decided to push your panties to the side and push two fingers into you. The sudden intrusion hurt but soon ebbed away as he slowly moved them in and out paying attention to your clit with his tongue to make you feel good. You coated his fingers in your arousal, it made a wet sound each time he pushed his fingers back inside as you grew wetter.
His mouth ate you sloppily it did not look like he had much experience he just let his curiosity take the lead and experiment if it looked like you enjoyed something he repeated the motion until you were practically soaking his fingers. It's embarrassing how his inexperienced fingers could trigger your orgasm within ten minutes.
It's probably because it was the first time someone put his fingers inside you. Jeongguk cleaned up the mess. He put his soaked fingers into his mouth and cherished your taste.
“I don’t taste weird right?” You don’t know if it’s bad or not, no one tasted you to say it for sure and for a reason you felt insecure. No matter how bad of a reputation he has within the company he’s every woman’s wet dream he’s so perfect that it’s scary to think about it sometimes. He has a perfectly sculptured nose with sexy facial features even his body is fit and just the right amount of fat and muscle. He could be so perfect if he wasn’t so twisted in the head.
“No, It’s strongly sweet. I like it.” He reassures you with a smile. It would look almost innocent if he hadn’t got his hand palming his obvious erection as he sucks on his fingers.
“Sit down.” Drunk on his compliment you don’t think about anything other than having his perfect cock buried in you. He seemed to like anything about you even if you’re far from perfect.
It looked like he didn’t really care about your appearance he just found you beautiful after he changed his mind about you. You have a feeling he would have liked anything about your appearance it just needs to be you.
It’s embarrassing how your legs wobble once you try to stand but he doesn’t laugh at all. Jeongguk pushes his pants down his ankle along with his underwear and man spreads on his expensive leather chair waiting for you while his eyes look you over hungrily. You’re surprised he follows orders so well after all he’s a powerful figure that bows to no one. It looks like he doesn’t care about that if he can get his dick wet.
Jeongguk strokes his cock with his big hands spreading the precum all around as you get closer and closer. He’s more than ready. You straddle his hips positioning yourself over him one hand moves your panties to the side for quick access. You sit slowly swallowing him inch by inch until he’s buried deep. Jeongguk throws his head back when you slowly circle your hips testing out the stretch.
“Did you have sex before?” To be honest it feels like a ridiculous question to ask him but with his inexperience showing it makes you feel that way. You doubt he had a healthy relationship with a woman before so it wouldn’t be a surprise if he hadn’t had sex before.
“No. You’re the first.” Jeongguk moans deeply when you tighten around him suddenly. You can hardly believe that you can be the first to fuck him.
Technically he’s your first too but you’re not going to tell him that. He would like it too much. Thanks to your big dildo that you practised on for years you have no difficulty taking him.
A part of you likes it. Everyone keeps nagging you about when will you get a boyfriend. You were never good at keeping up with a relationship you didn’t want to make an effort to keep it and now with him, you don’t think he will care how much effort you put in. Even if you wanted to you had a feeling it would be nearly impossible to get rid of him.
He said so himself he’s not going to let go of his object of desire until there’s nothing left of it.
You start moving and panting as you extort yourself by bouncing on his lap with this angle he hits all the right spots that you can’t stop even when your thighs start to ache. Yet you push through the ache and ride him like you mean it. You should do some sports as you’re getting tired too soon. Jeongguk helps you with his hands lifting you by the hips and slamming you down on his cock. He trusts up into you for extra measure and that makes it super deep as he pounds into you. He’s going to cum soon.
His virgin cock fills you up to the brim with his cum but he doesn’t let up once he cums he pushes through the oversensitivity not stopping until you cum too. His thumb rubs your clit in fast circles while his hips flex and shove his cock deep inside with fast precise thrusts until you cream around him.
You move your panties to cover your pussy again and try to ignore the feeling of his cum oozing out. You help Jeongguk clean up as well using a lot of tissues to clean up the mess that he has on his desk and chair. The last thing you need to fix is his hair while you like it touseled like this you need to make sure no one knows you two just fucked.
There’s still an hour left until everyone clocks out.
“I guess this would do.” You look over him one more time except for his swollen lips he looks good. His hair and clothes are perfectly in order. Your finger swipes over his lower lip trying to clean the remains of your lipstick when you hear a knock.
Contemplating what to do you decide it’s best if you just remain there standing by his side.
Jeongguk clears his throat and tells the person to come in when you nod. “S-Sorry for disturbing you. I’m here to hand in my report.”
It’s the new blonde girl that entered the company not long ago. She tries to hide her desire for her boss but she does a poor job at that. If she didn’t show a strong face of fear she could be the one now with his cum dripping down your legs. However, Jeongguk finds her uninteresting. Fear is boring. He likes you now and everyone around him is just a passing figure.
“Oh, Y/N, you’re here too. Sorry boss, I didn’t know you had someone here. Then excuse me.” She bows and leaves quickly. Thankfully she doesn’t seem to think you standing next to him is weird.
You release a huge breath that you were holding back the entire time in fear of getting caught.
“I guess I have to go back to my seat too.” Unsure what to do you decided to just do more work before you let your thoughts run wild. You agreed to be somewhat his girlfriend but not at the same time so you’re confused about what you two are at the moment.
The entire situation is fucked up.
“No. Stay here until I finish my work.” Jeongguk pulls you to sit on his lap but you’re worried that his cum dripping out of you will stain his pants so you want to stand up but he doesn’t let you.
“I- I need to clean up.” You try again but he holds you against his chest firmly by a hand around your waist. His other flipping through some reports.
“I don’t want you to be where I can’t see you.” This man, can someone grow this obsessed so soon? Or maybe he is always transfixed on one thing and now that one thing is you. You barely know anything about this man but you will have all the time to learn.
“If you let me go clean up I will go home with you.” You can use this as a bargain chip if you don’t he might even try to kidnap you and make you stay in his house without ever letting you leave.
“Okay. Come back soon.” You can taste yourself on his tongue. Reality starts to sink in as you let Jeongguk kiss you needily.
After you clean up in the bathroom you take a look at your reflection. Not that long ago you dried your tears and fixed your make-up thinking that you were going to quit and now look at you. Your neck is forming bruises and you have your boss’ cum in you. Things changed fast.
After that, you went back just like you promised and sat on his lap while he reviewed reports until working hours. He occasionally kissed your neck as he worked dividing his attention. This might be the first time in weeks you don’t have to work overtime as he drives you to his condo. He held your hand which is a nice romantic gesture but you have an inkling he was just holding it knowing that you can’t run away.
His house is in pristine condition it looks like one of the model houses you see in a magazine. It doesn’t feel like someone is living here, no family pictures or any personal items in his space. The fridge is also empty. It didn’t look like he was cherishing good childhood memories. Usually, a home is filled with pictures but he doesn’t have any.
“Do you really live here?” Half a day ago you wouldn’t dare to speak to your boss this way but you realised that you have no reason to fear him anymore. Jeongguk hides his face in the crook of your neck smelling you again.
“Hmn.” He answers while hugging you from the back. It will take a while to get used to this new side that you see.
“There’s nothing here to eat.” You close the fridge with a dissatisfied frown. You’re famished after skipping dinner to write that report and now there’s nothing here to eat. Not even a single orange. The fridge is absolutely empty except for five bottles of sparkling water.
“I mostly order takeout.” You roll your eyes but fish out your phone from your pockets. You can order from your favourite restaurant.
“What do you want to eat…uh, Jeongguk?” You hesitate for a moment before you cautiously call out his name. It’s past working hours so technically he’s not here as your boss and you’re in his house and already fucked which is already unprofessional enough that calling his name wouldn’t be that big of a deal.
“Anything is fine.” You nod noting that he doesn’t seem to mind you calling out his first name. You dial the right number and tell the server your order, and you decide on pizza. You try your hardest not to mess up your order as Jeongguk decides to stop waiting and pepper kisses all over your neck forming new hickeys and kissing over the forming ones. You will need a lot of make-up to hide this tomorrow. He didn’t really take your resignation so you think you still have your job at the company.
“S-Stop it, the food will be here soon.” The protest dies on your tongue as he fondles your breasts over your clothes. He kisses you passionately like he didn’t get to fuck you just hours ago.
“I can be quick.” You don’t need much more convincing as you spread your legs for him. He doesn’t waste time removing your underwear and spreads your pussy with two fingers. It feels good when he licks the bud flicking his tongue over it before he wraps his perfect lips around your clit and sucks. Your legs shake as he keeps licking your hands tangle into his hair pulling when he pushes his tongue into you.
Jeongguk moans and breaths hardly into you as you keep pulling his hair the sharp pain in his scalp goes straight to his cock. His face gets wet with your arousal as you keep squirming running from the pleasure. He doesn’t let you get away he holds you open with both hands on either side of your thighs using only his wet tongue to bring you bliss.
It's obscene how his brows furrow in concentration and his mouth makes that wet sound relentlessly licking and rolling his tongue until your orgasm washes over you and you cum all over his mouth.
Jeongguk made sure you finished before the food arrived.
You both scarfed down the food in ten minutes before he showed you his bedroom and laid you down on it.
He had the stamina to keep you up all night with his cock buried in your heat. You had work the next day but you were sure your boss wouldn’t scold you if you were late this time.
You felt invincible after becoming Jeongguk’s secretary no one dared to grab you or say anything rude to you after they witnessed Jeongguk’s anger everyone knew in the company that you had him wrapped around your finger. No one dared to approach you as Jeongguk is a possessive lover. The men hated you and the women loved you as you made their jobs easier after getting rid of the people who harassed the female staff. Jeongguk would fire everyone in a heartbeat if you said so.
At first, you were afraid if you could keep up his interest but his obsession never faded.
There’s this blonde again. You can tell what she’s thinking in that little head of hers. It was obvious from the start that she wanted Jeongguk but apparently, he only wants you. No matter how hard she tries to flutter her lashes or wear revealing clothes he doesn’t care.
She comes in to hand in a report trying to impress him with her work but fails when he doesn’t react.
Getting annoyed by her relentless tries to seduce your boyfriend you decide to end her delusions once and for all.
You sit down on Jeongguk’s lap as he flips through her report for a moment he looks surprised you normally don’t initiate contact when someone is in his office but he doesn’t mind it as he always craves your touches and attention. His hand is holding you to him by placing it on your stomach. You even relax into his body and lay against him with your head right under his chin. She can’t say a single thing but her face is turning red as you kiss his cheek. Jeongguk smiles at your cuteness but his eyes remain on the report.
He wants to read it as soon as possible so that woman would leave and he can have you all to himself.
“He’s mine.” You mouth to her.
She glares at you but once Jeongguk rejects the report and tells her to fix it by this afternoon without looking at her she accepts defeat and leaves the two of you alone. You swear there are tears in her eyes as she leaves in a hurry.
“You’re hot when you’re jealous baby.” You thought that he didn’t realise your little exchange as he was glued to the report but it seems nothing can escape him when it comes to you.
“Of course, no one can touch what is mine.” You smile into the kiss swallowing his wanton moans as you palm him over his pants.
Usually, he’s all over you but this time you decide to show him how much you appreciate his sole obsession.
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eternalguk · 8 months ago
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Losers || jjk. (M)
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I get lonely when you're not here, and this darkness appears, leaving me stranded.
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↠ Pairing : Jeon Jungkook x Female Reader
↠ Summary : Jeon Jeongguk. Your brother's best friend, your mom's favourite human, and the man who is saved as, the certified asshole, on your phone. With black hair and piercings, tattoos and skinny jeans… Jeongguk has been your worst nightmare since you were 18. Six years later, getting along with him is still impossible. The only difference? His pastime then was to steal your diary and read it aloud. Now? Well… let’s just say, it’s most definitely not the same.
↠ Genre : pwp, brothers best friend au, age gap au, fuck buddies au (angst, fluff & smut)
↠ Warnings : explicit sexual content, swearing, bickering but they’re actually flirting, teasing (a lot of it), making out, grinding, dirty talk, degradation, breast play, unprotected sex (be safe), kinda dom!jungkook, power bottom!jungkook, riding, begging, creampie, mentions of oral sex, mentions of one-sided feelings and i think that’s all.
↠ Word count : 1.6k
↠ A/n : hello <3 here’s a little something that i put together when I was bored! I hope you enjoy brothers best friend!Jungkook as much as I did whilst writing. Your feedback will be appreciated 🤍. Happy reading 🦢
↠ Song : meddle about - Chase Atlantic.
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You’re full. So damn full.
Jungkook’s thick and imposing cock is nestled inside you, the delicious stretch causing both of you to unleash the most desperate sounds.
“Ride me,” Jungkook’s voice is husky, and very evidently quivering with lust and need.
You gulp, licking your swollen lips before lifting yourself up and lowering yourself inch by inch, until he’s all the way inside again. The pressure between your legs is unbearable, body craving relief.
“Fuck,” Jungkook grunts, his fingers boring into your hips. “So greedy for my dick.”
And the taunting is back…
You roll your eyes, lifting yourself up again and slamming down so hard that you both groan. “And who was begging me to ride their dick?”
Jungkook whispers a string of curses, before thrusting himself upwards. “A-and who… who was begging me to have sex with them in the first place?”
You.
The answer was you, and you couldn’t even try to defend yourself.
Your brother had finally left the house, and in other words, you and Jungkook were finally able to fuck.
So here you were, in the living room, relentlessly riding your brother’s best friend.
Now, you weren’t that bad. Yes, you had made the first move, but Jungkook was no innocent bystander. Your thoughts linger back to where the shenanigans began.
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“Hey princess,” Jungkook smirks as he saunters into the living room, interrupting your peaceful evening. “Missed me?”
You roll your eyes, trying to ignore the flutter in your stomach at the sight of him. “Not even a little bit, asshole.”
“Stop lying,” he sings as he reaches over to take a chocolate covered strawberry from your plate. “I know you did.”
You remain silent, hoping he gets the cue and leaves. You don’t forget to mentally curse your brother for leaving you with this man-child.
Jungkook chuckles and you already sense a foolish comment about to leave his lips. “I know you love me, Y/N.”
You scoff, crossing your arms over your chest. “In your dreams, Jungkook. Your dick? Maybe. You? Never.”
He moves to take a seat on the couch adjacent to you, his gaze lingering a little too long. “You look cute when you're angry.”
You flush, hating how easily he gets under your skin. “Shut up, let me read.”
But instead of retorting, Jungkook leans closer, his breath warm against your ear. “Make me.”
You swallow hard, feeling a rush of heat between your thighs. "You wish."
His lips quirk into a smirk as he leans back, his eyes glinting with mischief. “Maybe I do.”
You grit your teeth, resisting the urge to kiss him. Why did he have to be so damn infuriatingly attractive?
As the evening wears on, your banter escalated into a full-blown war of words, each insult laced with underlying tension. But beneath the surface, there's something else brewing—a desire that neither of you wants to acknowledge.
The three previous altercations between you and Jungkook had led to sex… there’s no way you were going to let that happen again.
“I’ll just go keep myself busy with Areum. You know your really pretty friend? She’s been begging me to come over.” Jungkook grins mischievously, knowing he's finally pushed you to your limit.
But instead of storming off in a huff like usual, you surprise him by closing the distance between you, lips crashing against his in a heated kiss.
He responds eagerly, his hands tangling in your hair as he deepens the kiss, your bodies pressed together in a frenzy of need.
“Fuck, you drive me crazy,” Jungkook murmurs against your lips, his voice husky with desire.
You smirk, trailing my fingers down his chest. “You love it.”
He groans, his grip tightening on you as he whispers, “I’d be a liar if I said no.”
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And that was what had brought you to your current state. You begin to ride Jungkook in a fast, unrestrained pace, leaning forward so your clit can brush against his pubic bone, deepening your own pleasure.
“So big, Jungkook.. So deep,” you moan gratifyingly, throwing your head back as you relish in this complete heaven.
Jungkook smirks whilst watching you fuck yourself on his cock, pleasure vividly overtaking you as you roll your eyes with each bounce. “Good girl, ride my cock just like that.”
“J-Jungkook,” you whine faintly, his hands forcing you down completely and making you go faster. His low grunts and growls of your name make you warm up more, adoring the pleasurable sounds he makes. Your eyes meet his and you heat up as he gazes at you with lust stained eyes.
“Feels good?” Jungkook asks, helping you bounce on his dick. He looks extremely sexy right now with swollen lips, tanned skin and messy, tousled hair.
The sound of heavy breathing and the way his cock easily slides in and out of you reminds you just how blissful it is to be intimate with Jungkook. It was a shame you couldn’t call him yours.
“Mhm,” you inform him, slowly riding his dick up and down, your cunt swallowing his thick girth with ease and allowing yourself to be distracted from mellow thoughts. Jungkook thrusts up and you gasp at the sudden action, whining his name louder.
Jungkook scoffs at your reaction, smirking as his hands come to rest at your hips. You notice his lust filled eyes and it urges you to ride him faster.
“Going to miss this pussy when I leave,” Jungkook grunts, his deep, throaty voice making your heart race faster.
You ignore the ache that settles in your heart at the thought of him leaving.
“Mhm.” You respond, too overwhelmed by the feeling of Jungkook’s cock deep inside.
Jungkook’s lips brush over your clavicles whilst his hands slide up and down your back, eventually stopping on your ass, grabbing it to help you ride him. Your hips rock back and forth at a steady speed, relishing in the current moment.
“Ohh fuckk,” you cry out, savouring each drag of his monstrous cock. Your hips continue to rock back and forth and Jungkook simply wishes you both were on a mattress right now so he could pound into you hard and fast. You feel the way he contains himself from thrusting upwards, knowing very well that he’ll lose control.
The mere sight of you in the throes of pleasure, throwing your head back and lustily moaning has Jungkook weak. Your partly lidded eyes, flaming skin and heaving chest tells Jungkook all that he needs to know. You look alluringly beautiful, using Jungkook’s body to catch your release.
“Always ride me so fucking well, baby.” Jungkook rasps, lips moving to wrap around your nipples and sucking on them vigorously. He fondles with the other, neglected breast, pinching at your nipple and your whines only heighten.
“You look so sexy and you’re all mine,” he growls, his hips moving to thrust up against yours. His throaty voice impels you to shiver, dominance and possessiveness lacing it. “No one else can have this.”
“All y-yours, baby,” you croon, your walls tightening and clenching as his low grunts and moans turn you on. “There’s no one who’ll make me feel like this.”
And that’s true. You have no clue if you’ll ever stop craving Jungkook. The idea of him fucking someone else, paired with the idea of someone else fucking you, leave a distaste in your mouth.
“I’m close, Kook,” you whine whilst reaching for his veiny hands to rub against your palpitating clit. Jungkook understands the message, instantly moving his hand to thumb against it. He circles his finger around the bud and you helplessly mewl, aching to come.
You pull on Jungkook’s tresses as your hips begin to stutter in their grinding. “Such a good girl for me, always so good.” He encourages you and that simple sentence is all you need as your pussy clenches and slick cum squirts out of you.
“Just like that, baby girl. Just like that,” Jungkook harshly breathes, painting your insides with his seed. He lifts his hips, fucking into you through your orgasms. You moan loudly before falling against his chest, pressing firm kisses against his sweaty neck.
“I love it when you come inside me,” you purr, sucking deep, purple marks into his skin. Another thing that should not be happening. Looking after a baby, Jungkook’s baby to specify, was not something you imagine yourself doing anytime soon.
A husky moan escapes from Jungkook as he pulls your face towards his, pressing a searing kiss onto your rosy lips. He kisses you with love, purpose and sincerity. The third thing that should not be happening right now.
You shiver at the feeling of his cock being nestled inside your wet, warm walls. Jungkook’s hands move to your ass, gently grinding you against him. You pull back and are met with a sly grin on your temptations face.
Temptation was the word your mind had settled with. Is that what he was?
“Again?” He cockily mutters, moving forward to rub his nose against yours.
“Well, why not?,” is all you whisper back before pressing your lips against his, swallowing his giggles as you push him to lean against his seat, ready to be destroyed all over again.
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Jungkook’s fingers are lost in your hair, and his other hand rests against your waist, gently caressing your exposed skin.
You think back to days upon days with him, starting with a simple kiss to now fucking at every chance you get.
You dwell on your feelings for the man in front of you. Who would’ve thought that the Jungkook you passionately hated would be the one who’s on your mind constantly? The one who’s name comes to mind first thing in the morning. The one who’s worth every risk and battle.
Maybe you could tell him, whisper your fondness for him in his ear, but you don’t.
Instead, you snuggle into his warmth, hoping it’ll satiate your aching heart for now.
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And there we go. I hope you enjoyed! Feedback and comments are always appreciated ; it really makes me feel better about what I write so please do tell me what you think of this if it is not too much of a hassle <3
Until next time,
🤍
735 notes · View notes
vminity21 · 2 years ago
Text
Goodbye to Hello | jjk
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Pairing: badboy!jeongguk x female!reader
Word Count: 25,102
Genre: fluff, lots of smut oops, mega-angst, strangers to lovers!au, fuckboy/fuckgirl!au
Warning(s): profanity, infidelity, mega-angst (im sorry), mention of alcohol, smoking, smut, unprotected sex, oral (m + f receiving), slight m!dom, nipple play, hand job, dirty talk, ice play, ass grabbing, mention of a sex toy, squirting, hobi is a bad boy in this too, multiple orgasms, smutty kissing, reader may or may not have accidentally become a fuckgirl in this story sorry not sorry; Rated: 18+
Credit to: @yoonoclock for making such an incredible cover for this story that has taken me two long years to write. It’s finally where I need it to be and thank you so much Monnie for using your talent to create a banner that truly embodies the story.
Taglist: thank you so much for your patience with me! @ggukkieland @thisartemisnevermisses @moonchild1 @familiarlikemymirror3 @gukniverse​
Summary: After a devastating break up, you immediately move in with your sister, leaving behind the country life to relearn the ups and downs of the city. Adopting a cat and gaining a new job at a retail store part time, life seems to gradually bring happiness and healing, but you did not expect for it to become even more interesting when you stumble upon the enticing yet alluring tattoo artist, Jeon Jeongguk. Will this be an adventure of a lifetime? Or will hello always lead to goodbye?
Golden specks twinkle sporadically like fairy dust creating a shimmering tint to the air that collects the attention of any individual trailing the pavement. Pollen. The groovy excitement of a stuffy nose and mildly itchy eyes sounds stellar compared to how you could be feeling. Sniffling roughly, you squeeze your eyes shut momentarily to relieve what little of the itch that you can and trotting up the steps to your realm of refuge, you can hardly stand the excitement of bundling into the arms of your boyfriend, Jung Hoseok, and relaying how lovely it is to wipe your nose every five minutes. Maybe even ask if you can borrow the sleeve of his sweatshirt as a tissue. Pause. Maybe not.
Entering the rental home, you hadn’t noticed how eerily quiet it seemed, not right away; especially when you are so used to hearing the raging shots of a video game mingled with the yelling profanity between Hoseok and his best friend Kim Namjoon who bicker over headsets about wins that neither of them were really close to. But, let the males believe, they indeed, almost triumphed. Settling your handbag onto the dining table, you tilt your head in confusion. Is Hobi sick today? Where is he?
The floors creak beneath your tennis shoes while you observe the kitchen. That’s funny. The dishes are cleaned and put away, and not one stray of lint is seen upon the countertop- Hoseok has always been clean as well as you, but he never went over the top unless he had company over, and by company you mean his mother. Thoughts drift to the possibility of him wanting to surprise you for whatever the case may be, and your heart flutters at the mere inkling while a smirk graces your lips. How thoughtful, you feel gushy at his consideration of you, and your steps follow the direction of your bedroom.
It is then that your life spirals in a cluster of emotions that you will never forget; sparks dancing in your vision while your chest tightens intensely in response to the sounds you hear echoing beyond the door. No. You want to scream, but your throat constricts, not producing any verbalization no matter how much your brain signals. This can’t be real. Please don’t let this be real. The moans persist. The mystery female is eagerly gasping his name over and over while your heart shudders at the pain severing every vein within your frame. A tear falls panging the floor- your body is so tense, you shiver through the anxiety, and you know deep down that confronting him will hurt even worse than if you were to take the high road and walk away.
Wiping the dampness from your eyes, you spin to compile your things as in your handbag that contains your wallet, car key, and cellphone, and you march outside, slamming the front door behind you to shed some of the anger boiling in your system; you could care less if he heard your grand exit or not for you blocked his number before you settled into your car. You may be able to run from him, but you cannot run from the excruciating pain erupting beneath your chest nor the cycle of questions that refuse to stop spinning because why? After three years together, why would he betray you like this?
The front door flings open. Hoseok runs onto the porch in pure panic, hair disheveled, only in boxers, mouth gaping open as his widened eyes search until they lock with yours. But it’s too late. You are already safe within your car. Even when you notice the slim figure of a woman in one of his t-shirts, you do not move your gaze. You let the stare down with your boyfriend linger enough to rest your case. The second he starts rushing down the porch steps in a way to catch up to you for whatever meaningless apologies- meaningless explanations that will pour from his mouth- is when you reverse onto the road.
Behind the steering wheel with no destination in mind, you come up with the only solution you find reasonable, and you make your way to the city with the intention of starting over, even if it means it destroys you.
-
A queue of ants scurry along the lining of the windowsill where the sun tinges the glass against your knuckles. Shrivel sounds of the granola bar wrapper fills the silence of the kitchen while you gulp the final bite of your snack. Sometimes when your hands feel cold, you leave it to the sun to indulge your skin with warmth before trekking to your room, but instead, the growling of your stomach and the distraction of observing the insects seems to help with the boredom. Dread happens to consume the depths of your chest at the subtle reminder of returning to work in the morning; Sundays always bring the feeling of woe because it is the end of relaxation before continuing the week of being overwhelmed. But you figure adulting is worth it in some ways, and as everyone else, you must work to provide and live.
The chirp of your cat, Kenai, alerts your attention, him pouncing onto the counter to rub his head along your free wrist. “If you’re hungry, just say so,” you coo sarcastically, knowing he is due for his dinner in a few minutes. He will be a year old soon, his yellow eyes squinting as he rubs his head against your palm before arching his back once you run your hand to the end of his tail. Your eyes flit back to the ants darting in search of whatever they need, and inwardly, you are uncertain how your sister, Monnie would feel about the bugs, but you always found them fascinating.
Jumping off the counter, Kenai excitingly follows suit, twirling against your legs as you saunter to the pantry to retrieve his food. You have officially lived with your sister for a year now, and adopting Kenai was one of the best decisions you have ever made besides moving to the city. It is as if you disappeared from the prior life that you once lived and you like it just that way. Kenai temporarily ditches you for his food, and you stroll off to the living room where the scenery of a huge, flat screen television shows your reflection on the empty screen.
Monnie happens to be a successful artist who fell in love with another known artist by the name of Min Yoongi. Together they have won the world with their talent, and you could not have asked for a better couple to be in your life. If there is a true definition of love, it is how Yoongi gazes at your sister- because she is the only woman in the world, he will do anything and everything for. Jokingly, you always tell the pair that you are just going to stick with your cat, but the sadness that etches within Monnie’s eyes reveals that she hopes you will find a good man of your own. She is aware of why you abruptly returned to the place you were birthed, and she is aware that you refuse to speak of it even if it is pent up to the brim of imploding.
When you met your ex, it was in a park of all places. Not high school, not college, not through a family member or a friend: a park. It was a romantic way to begin even though you will never admit it now, but it started so naturally. So simple. You were reading a book while he was creating one. The way you were poised apparently sparked an idea for a story he openly confessed later on in the courtship. He described the scenery around you and how enwrapped in the book you were as something meant to be written for others to discover. How he could imagine a story just from the vision you had no idea you were forming for him.
You fell for him fast. Hard. He was your first everything aside from kissing and as time went by, you agreed to move in with him. You never expected what was going to happen in the future. You never anticipated such excruciating pain from the betrayal, nor did you notice any signs leading up to it. He’s tried contacting you from other phone numbers, but after four months apart, he seemed to have given up. But, because the pain is still so raw, you can’t bear to face him. You will crumple like a piece of paper in his presence if you were to ever see him again. For now, you do all you can to just avoid the situation as much as possible. Besides, he has her now. Whoever she may be.
Alas, what does it matter? It is not like he is able to reach out to you anyways for he is blocked on every and any social media site you can think of, and thankfully your name was not on the lease nor was your name hooked to anything involving your ex, so it will be fine. Or so you tell yourself repeatedly until you lose track of the thought. But that uneasy feeling creeps back up and instead of reaching for the remote, you decide maybe a walk around the city will be better. Monnie isn’t due home until later and you are assuming Yoongi will be tagging along, so why not pass the time by exploring?
Loneliness seeps in the gallows of your heart while you rush through the app for a driver. There is not a specific destination you prefer over another, so you pick a store at random around fifteen minutes away. With the money your sister has, she doesn’t expect you to pay for anything, all she cares about is your happiness though you refuse to not work; for now, you have a part time retail job whilst figuring out a career path that will become your future in the long term.
One thing you will say, is you have not missed driving in the city, hence the reasoning of you summoning a chauffeur. Traffic isn’t your favorite as commonly pronounced by anybody, and with how overwhelming your brain can feel, you prefer to be able to drift into the zone out rather than pay attention. Gripping the strap of your bag, you eagerly watch the road while cars pass by letting the heat of the breeze sweep through your hair. When the signal of your phone alerts you that your driver is close by, you aim your focus in the direction of a slowing vehicle, stunned by the countenance of a sharp jawline and rainbow colors dyed into bleach blonde strands.
The beauty you are about to behold is way out of your comfort zone, nor have you felt this attracted to an individual since your heart was obliterated a year ago. “Hi-hi,” you stutter once you enter the passenger side, the driver nods once with a smirk in tow, his button up snug to his frame, an earring dangling from his right ear.
“I’m Jimin,” he introduces, “Location still the bookstore in the city?”
“Yes please,” you are shocked you sound audible, but you return a timid smile while shoving some loose hair behind your reddening ear. The clean scent of lemon breaches past your nostrils while you try to maintain your composure, “I’m y/n, nice to meet you.”
“Likewise,” soft music plays in the background, yet the only sense you tune into is the pounding in your temples. Pull yourself together, he is just a guy who drives a car, who will safely take you to the bookstore, no biggie, you will survive, there are more important things to- “So, as a fellow book lover, I must ask, what is your favorite story?”
Oof. Conversation to minimize the awkward way your shoulders tense at the mere thought of looking over at him, you rummage through the possible answers, struggling to gather your words in a timely manner. “Very hard question,” you gulp, “It’s like asking to choose your favorite song or movie. Too many stories to explore,”
“And never a time you will run out of adventure,”
Eyebrows shoot up in response, “Right,” you smile, “Sounds like you love a good adventure,”
“I will neither confirm nor deny,” a soft chuckle escapes past his plump lips while he keeps his gaze ahead on the traffic. “Have you resided here long?” Shifting nervously in your seat, you watch the buildings of the city closely in a way to avoid Jimin’s gaze without obviously melting.
“Only a year, made a split decision to move in with my sister. You?”
Jimin flits his stare for only a moment, “For a long while. My best friend and I are opening a bar not far from the bookstore, you should come sometime. Invite anyone and everyone you want.”
“I love me a good drink,” bravery enters your frame while you briefly scan the smooth skin of Jimin’s face. “Sounds like a plan.”
“Taehyung has a lot of success in his business, and this will be his fourth opening so celebration is a must. He has a lot of sponsors and connections, the main being Kim Seokjin,”
Gasping, you immediately turn to him, “You mean the actor Kim Seokjin? You’re kidding!”
Laughing, Jimin’s smile stretches to show pearly white teeth, “I will allow you to punch me if I am,”
Deep down you try to suppress the memory of your ex-boyfriend who had written a script in preparation to be read for a potential movie, one that would, in hopes, hire Kim Seokjin as the lead. Hoseok is talented in the writing department and had dreams of becoming a successful author, but you gladly dismiss the memory when Jimin pulls to park for you to exit.
“Here,” swiftly he pulls out a business card handing it to you with a friendly grin, “The opening is in a few weeks, will I see you there?”
“One hundred percent,” clutching the card in your hand, you wave before shutting the door, turning to face the bookstore to hide the fact you would prefer to stare at Jimin whose face will haunt you for the time being. For fucks sake, I need to get laid. As you desperately insert the card into your wallet, you pause. Nay! Male specimens suck, they all suck, my mother said the purpose of a male is to produce a child that I clearly am not ready to birth from the womb that is my pretty pink uterus. That bleeds. Monthly. Because I am not housing a fetus I- Ew. Maybe you’d rather be an aunt. Or have an ovariohysterectomy. Maybe your uterus would like to be taken out of the equation in general.
And now I need a coffee…. Shit.
Since when have you been this intimidated by a good-looking man? And when have you found any of your sporadic conscious entertaining? Therefore, you passionately believe in keeping your mouth shut when you’re on a tangent because humiliation is not in your vocabulary. Or… Is it? Also, you hate admitting how long it has been since you have even been kissed, much less caressed lovingly until you fell asleep. Is moving on from heartbreak too much to ask for? The heat of Hoseok’s kisses trailing your neck were enough to make you come undone, but his betrayal outweighs the good times- good times that evidently weren’t enough for him. Huffing in congruent with the squeezing of your shutting eyes, you step along the semi-crowded sidewalk where people mind their business enough to leave you alone. Your hand must have pressed against your stomach for a bit because you can still feel the presence of the touch before you subconsciously removed your palm.
The bookstore is a popular joint in your opinion. It stands four stories high with the fourth floor having a garden center where people can read and smell the perfumes of flowers in peace. Unfortunately, you are not in the best mood for getting lost in the lines of a tale considering you were too busy thinking about your erm, lady possessions, so you tread what you hope will be enough distraction until you feel satisfied enough to go home. It’s funny the curveballs life will throw at you especially when twists and turns decide to expose themselves in the unexpected ways everyone wishes will not happen unless it gleams nothing but happiness. Sadly, for some, the hits of negativity must spark lessons before one reaches the promise land, so when you make a turn into the alley way leading to a popular coffee shop, you do not anticipate the way your life is going to change. Nor do you fathom the string of events that are about to follow when you stumble upon a leathered frame, sucking in a puff of a cigarette while he flicks at his eyebrow shimmering with a piercing, leaning against the wall where he swallows roughly. Undercut freshly done, his nostrils release the smoke in what seems to be slow motion while you halt in place.
Holy shit.
Tattoos ornament the entirety of his knuckles and wrist alluding to the beginning of a sleeve that’s covered by the thick material of his jacket. For all you know, he may not be one to approach, yet the tug of your heart is so strong, you try with all your might to make the executive decision to return to the bookstore, but alas, it is too late. Brown irises glance to your frozen figure right when he takes another drag of the cigarette, lifting an eyebrow in evident interest while your jaw drops unintentionally. “I’m-I’m sorry,” you bow in tiny, “I didn’t see you there.” Cringing, you know damn well that you saw him, and he sees right through your little white lie.
“You’re fine,” he replies, studying your expression, tossing the cigarette to the ground to muffle it, “Not the best place for me to smoke, but it’s the least populated area,”
At a loss for words, you nod in response, the guy barely pushing off the wall to stand straighter, the smell of the cigarette lingering. “Well, I guess I’ll be going.” You say under your breath, walking with a mission toward the coffee shop to catch your breath. How in the world can somebody be that attractive? First Jimin, now this guy? Why hadn’t you moved to the city earlier? Uterus, it is not time to ovulate! It is not the time! The ding of the bell alerts your arrival to the staff, and you contemplate your order deciding to try a new flavor of coffee. Surprisingly, it is not nearly as busy as it typically is, so once you retrieve your order and pay, you search for a secluded table to descend into for some form of solitude. And, to recover from the interaction with the guy from the alley. You have never smoked a day in your life, but he made it seem so tempting, which in your case is nowhere near normal, so you shake the strange attraction from your mind as best as you can.
Sipping the hot liquid frequently, your sister has always teased that you delight in drinking coffee in the evenings, but it is your comfort go to especially when you need something to do, or to feel relaxed. The bell of the door echoes prompting the immediate noticing of whoever the customer is that entered. Swallowing abruptly, your heart leaps at the sight of the guy you literally saw fifteen minutes ago in the alley. A creeping blush spreads along your chest soon touching your cheeks to the point you wish you could hide. In a way, you attempt, sinking a smidge in your seat wondering if that will prevent him from noticing your presence.
Nice try.
Between the minimal number of customers and the efficiency of the employees, a tattooed hand linked to a coffee cup slides into the seat across from you, tilting his head curiously when you toss your sight to bask in the glory of his profound attraction. You are in so much trouble. “Hi, again,” you murmur, crossing your arms over your chest to hide the quivering of your cold fingers, and to tame the flipping of your ovaries. “Did I scare you enough to make you confront me?”
Smirking a breathy laugh, he takes a swig of his coffee, “I’m not scared of anything.”
“If not fear, what brings you to my table?”
Wetting his bottom lip, you are proud of your feigned courage, but you genuinely are shocked by his sudden presence. Did you leave an inadvertent impression? Quirking an eyebrow, a small smile remains on his lips, “A confession.”
“If it’s sweet talk, I’ll pass.”
Leaning forward to perch his elbows on the table, he folds his hands showing the tattoos you inwardly reveled in earlier, his head poises to the side while he presses his knuckles to his chin casually. “Bold of you to assume I was here to compliment you.”
“Ouch.” You deadpan. “But then again, my mother’s compliments are all that matter to me. Anything you say is irrelevant.”
“Oh,” gradually laying his intertwined fingers onto the table, he challenges with a stare that can make any human being melt into the wooden floor. Fuck. “Then I guess telling you that your shirt is inside out isn’t going to change anything.”
Gasping, your palms fly to your chest where you instantaneously look to see the lines of your t-shirt that clearly expose the fact that you indeed left the house with your shirt on wrong. It is not as embarrassing as one may think, but you were unaware of the food stain dazzling along the side of your boob. Which in this case, makes you blush harder knowing that his eyes may be lingering in an area where no man is welcome currently. But why do you lowkey indulge in the idea of him taking a moment to sweep you up and down? Get a fucking grip, y/n.
“Well,” you sporadically move to position yourself in the seat where the point out will no longer be as obvious, “I appreciate how observant you are, but at least it’s not the worst thing to discover. In public.”
Chuckling under his breath, he shrugs, “I agree. Just figured I’d inform you, otherwise, my intentions are pure.”
Scoffing, you cross your arms again, remaining comfortable in your chair, “That’s not suspicious at all.”
“If I wanted anything, I would have asked already.” He murmurs, “And I always get what I want.”
“Fearless and greedy,” you are vastly grateful that the uterus doesn’t make noises when it’s craving to house an infant, especially with a man as ballsy and gorgeous as the one before you. And why the hell are you even thinking of children at a time like this? Any other male specimen would have made this conversation creepy, but this guy is so alluring that it doesn’t seem to bother you in the least. “What’s your name, Cigs?”
He chokes mid-sip, “That’s a new one.”
“What’s the norm?”
“Do you really wanna know?”
“Not if it’s sexual.”
“Oooo, then I’ll never tell.”
“Pure, my ass.”
“I never said I was pure, milady, I said my intentions with you were pure.”
Eyeing him questionably, you stifle a jeer, “Not sure if that’s an insult, but I’ll take it.”
Smiling enough to where a glimpse of his teeth is seen, he reaches a hand forward, “I’m Jeongguk.”
“I’m y/n.” Kindly, you take his hand returning the greeting with a grin.
“And I find you extremely striking. I mean that with all sincerity.” Gently, he presses a warm kiss to the back of your knuckles before releasing your clammy hand. “Now go fix your shirt before my OCD destroys me.”
Groaning, your mind wants to focus on the sensation from his lips on your skin, but instead, in mild humiliation, you shake your head kiddingly while you mosey to the restroom. Remembering to bring your purse, you hadn’t realized you left your phone behind on the table next to your drink. Returning, you’re shocked to see that he’s left; your phone and coffee appear untouched, yet you feel the sting of disappointment for you enjoyed the bickering even though some may find it strange. It has been a while since you have been in proximity with a man of such nature, especially one whose features leave an imprint on every crevice of your brain.
The ride home holds nothing but thoughts of the lad who mysteriously approached you at your favorite coffee spot, mostly questions of wonderment of who he is. Jeongguk, sure, but what is his story? Shoving the thought past your mind, you enter your room once you arrive home and feed your cat, slipping into your pajamas and collapsing onto your bed releasing a long sigh. Slamming your palms to your face, the keen chirp of Kenai sounds as he pounces onto the bed, rubbing his head against your cheek until you split your fingers to peer at your cat lovingly. “You have already eaten, you brute. Let me simmer in sadness please.”
Eventually you give in, petting him before you find your eyelids heavily craving slumber. It is the next day when you awaken to sunshine pouring through the blinds casting dancing shadows upon your bedspread. Kenai’s fur tickles your cheek where he has cuddled cozily to you, which is the usual with your cat, and gazing fondly at your furry friend, you blindly pat your desk to grasp your phone to sneak a Snapchat. “Don’t you move, KiKi.” Angling the phone, you take a photo, posting to your story to show off how precious your animal is. You were so lucky when you found your cat. After the devastating blow to the chest a year prior, the first thing you did was visit a shelter not far from Monnie’s house in search of the first animal to win your heart.
In all honesty, they all did, but one look at the small fluff puff, pressing his paws against the glass, meowing for you to notice him was all it took. He purred the moment your hands wrapped around his small body, his cold nose sniffing along your face that was stained with tears. He was the little superhero besides your sister that you needed to find some form of healing. Kenai hasn’t left your side, and he refuses to. You never knew a cat could love you so much, even on the nights you wake up with him sprawled across your trachea. His love may be smothering, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.
Kissing the side of his head, his sleepy eyes remain out the window where birds zip past to distract him. Throwing the covers off you, the number one thing you do is brush your teeth, changing into your work clothes, and tying your hair up out of your vision. Kenai eventually follows you with all the hopes of getting his breakfast which you prepare, and before shuffling into your tennis shoes, you check your phone where your eyes enlarge to the rising beat of your heart.
Jeongguk is typing….
“What the hell?” You mouth. The guy from yesterday added you on Snapchat? How? The only thing you can think is your phone happened to be unlocked unless he was able to open the picture app to scan his Snapchat code. Either way, you are not wanting to admit how pleasantly surprised you are, and when the familiar tone of the Snapchat alerts his official message, you hold yourself back from replying to him too quickly.
It's an exuberantly strange feeling, how giddy one can become all because of a mere message of someone where their interest lies. And the nervous tingles at the bottom of your stomach ignite as you ponder every and any scenario involving the mysterious lad. You have yet to reply, nor do you have any clue what to expect, but you deeply hold nothing but genuine curiosity of how this may play out. Will he be interested in you? Are you ready for someone to be interested in you? That may be the more accurate question. Hoseok hurt you beyond words, but will Jeongguk do the same if you do end up finding him enchanting? What if he doesn’t think you are enough? With all the women in the world, it seems that you can’t hold a guy down enough to seem worth it. Stop it. Wincing, you grit your teeth knowing the negativity needs to end now. Of course, you are enough. You have always been enough, and nobody should make you doubt otherwise. “Anyone who doesn’t see the good in you is at a loss. You are literally the epitome of kindness,” Monnie’s words repeat in your head, uplifting you enough to focus your mind on other matters. Like, preparing your brain cells for the workday ahead.
Finicking with your uniformed red vest, you greet a fellow coworker with a smile, “Good morning, LenLen! Is it five o’clock yet?”
Giggling, LenLen’s face lights up at your question as she finishes folding a pair of jeans to set upon a display. “It is somewhere.”
“Good point,” walking the isles of the store to tidy up the shelves, you can’t help but wonder if it has been long enough since Jeongguk messaged you. Giving it another ten minutes to ensure the coast is clear of customers, you sneak into the breakroom, unlocking your phone to see what he said. You are appalled at yourself for being so consumed in the fact that a guy you just met has taken time out of his day to reach out to you and you wish you could maintain your cool.
‘Dude, your cat looks just like my hellion, Flounder.’
Smiling at what you have read, you click to save the message, so you don’t forget what is being talked about once you exit the snapchat, and you are nearly losing your mind when Jeongguk’s Bitmoji appears a few seconds after you start typing. Uncertain of what else to say, you respond with, ‘Prove it.’ GAH! You grimace, that’s what you have to say? Prove it? Beating yourself up, you forget to breathe the moment the red icon shows that Jeongguk has sent a picture of what you are assuming is his cat. Opening it with the click of your thumb, you are amazed how identical Flounder and Kenai are even considering they could be potential siblings, what a small world right? ‘First off, LOVE the name’, you reply, also realizing you are blushing because also within the picture, a side profile of Jeongguk shows that he is smiling.
Knowing you will have to return to the floor soon, you decide to let Jeongguk send at least one more message before you have to be a responsible adult. ‘Right? It was either Sushi, Tuna, or Sardine, but I thought Flounder would be more fitting and unique. Tetra is my other cat and she’s the worst about stealing my food.’
‘Sounds like Kenai can finally make some friends! And attempt to steal a morsel alongside.’
Typing out the message, you hesitate to send, but with the shared love of felines you honestly feel as though Jeongguk will not overanalyze your reply. Anxious for lunch break, you handle the hours with ease, conversing with LenLen from time to time to figure out who has done what on the chores list. LenLen speaks of a guy that she met recently, with a square jawline and hair as curly as a bowl of ramen noodles, yet his bright smile is what drew her to him. You talk of how happy you are for her and hope for the best, chickening out to tell her about Jeongguk, especially with it being, in your opinion, extremely too soon to mention.
Retrieving your food, you hide away in the breakroom where your eyes immediately glue to your cellular device anticipating whatever Jeongguk has said. ‘Hell yeah, my babies would love that, they do very well with other animals, surprisingly. Hey, sorry I left so soon yesterday, something came up.’
‘It takes a bit for Kenai to warm up, but he will adapt just fine. All he cares about is his stomach being full. No need to apologize, I totally get it.’ Eyebrows furrowed; you can’t help the wonder of what made him leave so soon. Also, you are not one to press further, if he wants to explain himself then he will. Otherwise, you hope that everything is okay with him.
It has only been a few days when you enter the coffee shop again, making it obvious that it indeed is your favorite, and you are shocked the employees don’t know you by name yet. Or so you assume. It is when you see Jeongguk taking a sip of his drink searching for an empty table, your heart leaps as if on cue. You are starting to assume that maybe he is a recent frequenter of this same coffee shop too. Why else have you seen him twice in the span of a few days? You’ve never noticed him here before this week, so now you wonder if he recently moved to the city. His leather jacket hugs his frame as his hair is styled to his liking. You hardly notice the way your mouth waters instinctively and you snap back into focus when you are next in line.
Pretending you didn’t notice Jeongguk, you decide to find a seat a short distance away just in case by some chance he acknowledges you. With coffee in hand, you pick a spot and not even sixty seconds later, you hear the familiar click notification of someone typing on Snapchat. Jittery, which you wish wasn’t so obvious, you carefully reach for your phone seeing: Jeongguk is typing… lighting the screen. Without thinking, you immediately lift your gaze to see him staring at you, a mischievous smirk gracing his pink lips.
Just for his delight, you play along spinning some storybook thought that you two are forbidden lovers hiding from the community by texting instead of speaking to one another in person. Get a grip, y/n, you scold yourself mentally. Opening the message, it reads: may I join you in coffee matrimony?
Shaking your head along with a breathy laugh to his cheesy statement, you respond with a pun, only if you keep me brewing, Tatts!
The creak of his chair echoes as he slides it back. Shyly, you hold his stare, watching him and his thick boots walk to settle into the chair across from you. “Clever,” he muses, leaning forward to rest his elbows on the table. Strands of his hair fall at the outer corners of his eyes, and you breathe in the faint scent of his cologne. This time, you do not get a whiff of any cigarettes, so you question if he’s even had one today. “If you’re not careful,” he deliberates, “I might have to show you what it’s like to get creamed.”
“Hm.” Arching an eyebrow, you catch on to his game, and if he wasn’t so damn alluring, you wouldn’t even give this conversation another thought with anybody else, “You better hope it tastes as sweet as sugar.” He doesn’t expect you to say that. He may have had women fall hopelessly at his feet, and as much as you feel you might be the next one, you definitely aren’t going to show it. Not right now.
“I hear that the ladies like it steamy.”
“Or iced,” you shrug nonchalantly. Ice play has always been a curiosity of yours, but he doesn’t have to know that. When he doesn’t seem to come up with another pun, you chew the corner of your lip before you lean onto the table yourself, inching as close as you can that the table between you two will allow. “Tell me, Boots, how is it… that a guy with this tough exterior can be so delicately precious about his cats?”
He gestures with his hands. “What can I say? I have to set a good example.”
You harrumph humorously. “I’ll believe it when I see it.”
He feigns surprise. “You think I am incapable of being a good role model to my children?”
“Oh please. All you have to do is keep their food bowls filled to the brim and you’ve already won dad of the year.”
Jeongguk winks, bringing his hands together to interlace his fingers reminding you of the tattoos you wish you can visualize more. “Easy peasy lemon squeezy,” he smirks.
You have a hard time breaking his gaze, but you clear your throat when it lingers a bit too long. “Anyways,” you attempt to change the subject, “I hope all is well.” You’re really hinting about why he left so suddenly the last time but knowing men do not always pick up on hints, you know you will accept whether he gets what you mean or not.
“Seeing that you put your clothes on right today, my OCD hasn’t been triggered.”
“Happy to see I’ve made a difference in your life.” You playfully sneer.
“It’s the little things that count.”
You feel your uterus squeeze. How the fuck is he so damn attractive for? “I’ll keep that in mind every time I dress.” You say it too quickly without thinking, your cheeks glimmering blood red. He quirks an eyebrow tauntingly.
“I can always help.”
“Nice try, Cigs.”
Except… You want him to try. That itching desire travels through your chest, and you wonder maybe… just maybe, you can get his help. Not necessarily with getting dressed because you swear you are competent to do so, but… maybe he can cure the curse of loneliness, even if it’s just for the moment. You want to deny that you hope it will be much more than just this moment. You can’t explain any of this. Are you trying to impress him?
Uncrossing your ankles underneath the table, you do slide your feet forward taking the tip of your boot to tickle up his leg and you can’t help the smirk that graces your lips when he sucks in a hiss. There’s a tad bit of space on the chair where you place your boot, gracefully taking your other foot to nestle on the other side of his hips. You don’t know what is taking over you, but it’s divine, and now you can’t stop yourself especially with his eyes tempting for you to continue. “I’m gonna need help with more than-”
“How’s it going?”
You jolt, boots slamming to the ground when your wide eyes shoot to see a smiling employee who clearly is going from table to table to check on customers. Stammering, you lick your lips while Jeongguk tries not to laugh in response to your sudden shock. “Goo-good!” You plaster a wide smile while the employee bows swiftly to then waltz to the next table as if they didn’t intrude on your façade to win over this incredibly attractive man across from you. Fuck, you grimace. How embarrassing.
When coffees are finished and downed in clumsy silence, you reach for a stick of gum, offering Jeongguk a piece so you don’t feel so insecure about the coffee breath. He offers to walk you home, but you tell him the bookstore is where you plan to be next. You’re not ready to go home because home is where you will replay the humiliation of what just happened repeatedly. You need a distraction.
Side by side, the pair of you set off down the alley, your nerves still shooting through your limbs while anxiety of what to talk about tackles your brain cells. You’re really trying to forget already, but it’s too fresh to just repress. Maybe there is a sliver of comfort with the silence, but of course, you overthink that as well because when do you not overthink?
You know what? You saw the pleasure in his eyes, there wasn’t a smidge of doubt in his expression when his body responded to you in the coffee shop. Noting that the alley is empty, you take the opportunity. If he wasn’t the slightest bit into you, he wouldn’t be adamant on making sure you arrive to your next location safely. But you need to think fast before you exit the alley. “Cigs!” You blurt. He stops the second you do. The gravel beneath his boots being the last sound you hear before adrenaline takes over.
Your hands grip the front of his leather jacket and when he clues in, as if rehearsed, his large hands grasp your hips, walking you backwards until your back gently bumps against the brick building. His gaze is intense as if preparing you what you are asking for while your mouth parts in yearning for whatever he is about to do. He over towers you, and your eyes never move even when his palms slide to your waist, his shaky exhales leaving his nostrils. His lips are pressed together. When you think he’s about to kiss you, he slams his eyes shut, shifting nothing but his forehead to lean to yours as your eyes flutter closed. Waiting.
Tingles resonate across your skin and the longing is immensely strong, you don’t want to hold back. You hadn’t realized that the back of your hands are against the brick wall as if you have surrendered to him. In a way, you have. The seconds feel like minutes, and when you think he will finally connect with your body, he pulls away. His hands ghost your waist.
For some reason, you keep your eyes closed. His lips then brush warmly to your forehead and with that, you hear the crunch of his footsteps disappearing as he did the first time you met. Your eyes peel open, and it’s like Jeongguk is a figment of your imagination because now:
he’s gone.
-
You never expected to hear from him again, but as days pass, it’s crazy how one person can enrapture the entirety of your thoughts even with the distractions from work because Jeongguk has mastered it for you. And that is how it has been the rest of the week, giddily waiting on his every text and enjoying every bit of the conversations shared between you two as if the sexual tension in the alley never happened. Eagerly, you toss and turn at night due to the cycle of daydreams rehearsing in your mind rent free, but you can’t help yourself, you love to imagine the possibilities of a real adventure with someone you want to spend time with again. If it ever happens.
“You’re glowing.” Monnie’s eyes squint as you grin away to the kitchen, opening the refrigerator for an electrolyte drink.
“I… cleansed my face?”
“No, it’s not that.”
Teasingly scoffing, you take a swig of your drink, “I... am… expecting?”
“Nice try,”
You nearly choke on the second sip, “C’mon, it’s not that impossible. You don’t know my schedule.”
“I know it enough to know that you haven’t missed a birth control shot since you became physically intimate, and that was practically decades ago.”
“You can just say sex you know,” you retaliate, “And for your information, I had sex last year.”
“Yeah, practically decades ago.”
“Fine. Ten or so excruciatingly long years ago, I had sex.”
“So, in conclusion, you are not with child.”
“Yet,” you ploy, letting Monnie glare at you as she slowly steps out of the kitchen. Who are you kidding? You don’t have time for kids, and you know it. Despite what your uterus wants, you do have to find a stable time to want to produce so for now, you shall wait until the time is right. Hence, why you remain on birth control until you know for sure. Otherwise, life goes on as always. Besides… you do recall the last time you had sex. And… it wasn’t with Hoseok. A secret you will take to your grave if you have to. A secret that happened one drunken night weeks after you and Hoseok broke up. And, you never went back hence why it has been a year since you’ve had sex.
You had guilt as if you cheated on Hoseok even though you did not in fact. Either way, you throw the memory into the depths of your mind and try to force yourself to forget how plush the man’s lips felt along your skin. Instead, you replace it with the brief kiss Jeongguk left on your forehead which feels so out of reach.
During the time of messaging back and forth, one evening, Jeongguk offers to call you due to an atrocious event happening at your workplace that you and LenLen got involuntarily involved in. A customer apparently read a sales sign wrong and didn’t realize it until checkout and no matter how much you and your coworker tried explaining things, the customer was not having it which leaves you to call a manager. Overall, it was a situation that unfolded that you honestly wished didn’t hover in your brain cells, but when Jeongguk calls so you can rant, it means the world.
“You are quite attractive and that’s one hundred percent a compliment, and I’m not one to just throw those around to male specimens.” You confess after long conversation. It’s like you moved on from the awkward interactions. Plus, you convince yourself that you came on too strong the last time you saw him.
He snickers on the other line and vividly you imagine his smile, tickling your tummy like the beating wings of multiple butterflies. “Why, thank you. You definitely have my attention, too, ya know.”
“Well…’ You press the knuckle of your thumb to your bottom lip for a second, “That’s very sweet of you to say.”
“And you also deserve to be respected. I’m sorry the customer gave you and your friend such a hard time. If retail is no longer what you want to do, my stepbrother owns a well-known bookstore. I remember you mentioning your love for books at one point and I’m sure he will offer good pay.”
“You would do that for lil’ ole’ me?”
Chuckling lightly, “Anybody with a smart mouth like yours needs a break too.”
“Oh shucks,” though he can’t see it, your cheeks flush a hot shade of red. “Consider me interested! I may give the store some more time since I don’t want to leave LenLen stranded so abruptly, otherwise, I might put in an application just cause.”
“I’ll keep my stepbrother posted.”
You thank him before you decide to head to bed, dazed on cloud nine as you hang up the phone.  
-
It doesn’t matter how busy you are, the second you see the:  Jeongguk is typing…. Notification it’s:
Halt. Stop everything and scramble to unlock the phone screen. Breathe. He is just a guy. He is just a dude with tattoos. Okay, must read message in sixty seconds to not seem desperate. Force yourself to Google search ‘kittens’ to distract your frantic desire to reply immediately to his every text. Does it work? Partially.
So…. I was wondering, would you happen to be off in the next few days? It’s been a minute.
Double take. Eyes enlarged. No way. Inhale. Release. Slowly but clearly, you reread the Snapchat message as if your life depends on it. How long has it been since you two have been messaging back and forth? Maybe a few weeks? But how should you respond? Maybe not as excited so you don’t appear deprived? Or seem super excited so that he knows you are most definitely wanting to meet up? You were super proud of yourself with how contained you stayed when he called you however long ago. Nay, appear neutral. Come across dainty with a sprinkle of bad ass, that’ll get him…. Right? Okay, maybe not.
Funny you ask because I happen to be off today. Send. You squeal internally. You genuinely can’t help how stoked you are in seeing him; the next question is, what is his idea of fun aside from the coffee shop? You are honestly up for anything even if it’s admiring the night sky on a roof with glasses of wine. Or, admiring his tattoos and him explaining the meanings of each one. You have always wanted to get a tattoo yourself but have yet to decide not only what to get but when the right time will be. As with anything, you want the first time to be special. That’s what she said, as you roll your eyes at yourself. Your uterus sure likes to talk, and you really hope you can keep yourself tame once you see him again because a year of no intimacy is already hard enough; and you atrociously hate admitting that you sometimes become lonely for a partner even though healing this past year has been a roller coaster. Even trying to avoid the temptation to reach out… to the last man you entangled with.
Shuddering with guilt, you stroll to the kitchen upon waiting for Jeongguk’s response, and you notice beneath a magnet the card the driver, Jimin, had given you forever ago. The day you met Jeongguk. Carefully shifting it out from under the magnet, an idea does form. Maybe Jeongguk would like to meet you there at the opening. Does he seem like a ‘bar’ type kinda guy? Oh. You wince. What does that even mean? Who doesn’t like a bar setting with a few beers? Plus, it’s been a while since you’ve been to one so why not?
Well today is our lucky day for I happen to have the next 12 hours to find something fun to do. Whaddya say about joining me?
Bring it on, Cigs. You respond and despite the nervous jitters, you type more after the initial message you sent. I actually promised to go to an opening of a new bar that happens to be tonight. If I send the address, would you like to meet me there?
When he asks for the time and where, you send the information. You will get to see him tonight. Now all you can do is panic about what to wear and if you even have anything to wear for the occasion.
Fantastic.
-
Quivering fingers amidst clammy palms slide across the tops of your thighs while you steadily breathe. You, being the early bird that you are, arrive at the bar a few minutes earlier than what you mentioned to Jeongguk. The last you heard from him was when you both finalized the plan. To calm the nerves, you definitely need a drink. A strong one. Your maroon dress clings to your frame the way you like, and you made sure your make up was exactly how you like it to be.. You haven’t felt this confident since you left your ex. And you hope this proves that you never need a man to help you dress.
You ordered a cab to get there so you didn’t have to worry about driving, and you figure if you and Jeongguk still hit it off in person as you do through messaging, then maybe he can make sure you get home safely. So, you hope. Maybe even make up for lost time since the alley.
Sending a quick message to let Jeongguk know you have arrived; your eyes observe your surroundings, and you don’t see him anywhere just yet. Maybe he is stuck in traffic? You wonder. If he is driving, obviously he shouldn’t message you, so you show your ID to the bouncer after standing in line for a few minutes letting the uneasiness settle.
Bodies are scattered among the floor as music blares throughout the building. Laughter and the smell of alcohol is the first thing that comes to your nostrils while your eyes trail for some familiar faces if any happen to be here. Colorful flashing lights wave over the tables, walls, and chairs while people dance continuously, and you really hope despite the overall dim lighting you recognize Jeongguk the second he walks in. Regardless, you search for Jimin since he is the one who invited you, but you haven’t seen him thus far.
Swallowing down the nerves, you squeeze through the crowd until you reach the bar, asking for something strong for you to sip on until Jeongguk arrives. It’s been about ten minutes once your drink is in your hand, and when you check your phone, Jeongguk still hasn’t read the message. You contemplate phoning him, but know it’s too loud to try, so you assure yourself he will be here. You have full confidence that he will call you if he is running late. Which… technically at this point he should have called you by now.
To divert yourself from the sinking feeling, you watch the bustles of people having the time of their lives when a particular human being causes your shoulders to stiffen and your mouth to run dry. Flashbacks of that night flicker in your mind as a weary sense of dread subdues you. The secret you have kept concealed from the world. Stay calm, y/n. Remain. Calm. You hardly remember how you got there, but you noticed how handsome he was, how his hair was loosening from the gel, and his smile put you at ease as you two laughed together. He was drunk, too, but both of you were still aware enough to know what was happening. What was stirring between you two. All you held onto was how he was the first to make you laugh in weeks during that time.
You knew you shouldn’t have been there, but you didn’t care, and you were desperate to feel something. Freshly single and overruled by anger, you let it win. When you kissed him for the first time, he froze, and you pulled away. But he held your eyes, flitting between them without a single word. Instead, he leaned forward and kissed you back, and you remember the way his palm felt on your cheek. The way the kisses grew aggressive and emotional as if he felt the guilt from keeping the secret buried from you. Knowing his best friend was in the wrong for what he did to you, but he knew it wasn’t his place to tell you the truth. But boy, had you made it your place to entangle with this guy who was giving into what his emotions were displaying. He wanted you to feel special. It was like his kisses brought an apology you wished your ex would have given you.
So, in a strange yet erotic way, you let it all go with him. Drunken, slovenly kisses until the pair of you started to sober up enough to experiment further. You can’t remember much of the foreplay, but you do, however, remember when he pressed himself into you, riding smoothly as he kissed every inch of your face and your neck. His hands didn’t exactly know where to touch, but his lips did, and that was enough. He moved in you so gently.
When you had awaken the next morning, you laid flat on your back while tears streamed from the corners of your eyes. You don’t know how long you remained there. You don’t know how long you silently cried. But you left before he woke up. You left before you both had to take in account of what you two had done. What you two had shared.
Now here he is in the present.
Kim Namjoon, Hoseok’s best friend, is here, and he spots you almost as immediately as you spot him. Gulping, you do not know what else to do other than spin around immediately and face the bar contemplating to chug every ounce of the alcohol remaining in your glass. Setting your drink down cautiously to not spill the contents, a rear of nausea raises its ugly head. What is Namjoon doing here!? The last time you saw him was the night you would do anything to forget.
Heart hammering, you squeeze your eyes closed. Namjoon may have given you a good night to hold on to for a while a year ago, but it wasn’t anything more than that. It couldn’t be. You were full of anger and a brief desire of revenge, and you were drunk, and you were-
Large hands lean upon the counter of the bar on either side of you as you suck in a breath. You recognize those hands. Those hands are the ones that slid along your body while you pleaded for more. And the countenance of his frame over towers you as you feel the tip of his lips centimeters from your ear kindling goosebumps along your arms. But these hands aren’t the hands you’ve been waiting for. Not one tattoo shows on these hands.
“Long time, no see.” Namjoon says into your ear. Mustering enough courage after steadying yourself, you turn to face him for the first time in a year. His eyes are as filled with longing as they were the night you last saw him. The kind of longing that wonders of how you feel about what occurred. If you still ponder it.
“What are you doing here!?” You say amongst your trembling body. You try to stay firm though you know deep down none of this was Namjoon’s fault. Trying to set your jaw, you take in the way his shirt tugs at his muscles, and the way his hair is gelled to perfection. You have forgotten how beautiful this man is, but Jeongguk. Where the literal fuck is Jeongguk? He is who you want deep down. So where is he? “Never mind that,” you shake your head, realizing he has every right to be here as you do. “What do you want?”
Namjoon’s eyes flicker along your face momentarily before he speaks. The way his dominant gaze holds you in place could drive any woman mad. “To make sure you’re okay.”
“Oh bullshit.” You say through gritted teeth because not only is Namjoon’s proximity bringing unwanted emotions, but it is also bringing the memories of Hoseok. Memories you really have tried not to relive.
Namjoon’s eyes squeeze shut. “y/n, I’m being serious. You fell off the face of the earth since…”
“Since what? Since Hoseok? Or you?” His mouth shuts automatically. “I don’t know what you expect me to say. What happened that night… It was my fault. I know that, but it shouldn’t have happened.” The anger for even saying Hoseok’s name after so long of refusing to is a strange feeling. Namjoon swallows, his Adam’s apple bobbing, and you visibly see the guilt in his eyes because he agrees. Hoseok has been his best friend since they were kids. “How long had you known by the way? About the other girl? Who is she?” He releases a sigh, shaking his head while he tilts his gaze downward in shame. He knows. Of course, he does. He’s refusing to answer the question, but you ask another one anyway. You know it’s too loud to whisper, and from your peripheral, you may have gained a few stares, but you raise your voice just enough for Namjoon to hear. “Does… he know?”
“That we fucked?” Namjoon answers quickly, his eyes locking with yours. “Of course not.” He’s not going to risk losing his friendship is what you are reading between the lines.
“Good.” You refuse to move your gaze. “Keep it that way. Please.” He’s still so close. And you breathe in his scent. Your hand brushes his chest, while your forehead touches to his chin. Both of you share a silent understanding. A pact.
Namjoon is about to say more but you politely shove his arm out of your way ignoring his reach to stop you. You’re scared that you will give in to the thought of him from all these emotions. Whatever he has to say, he can keep it to himself. For now. You need to catch your breath.
Checking your phone, Jeongguk still hasn’t read your message and at this point, you have no idea of where he is or why he even bothered agreeing to show up if he truly had no intentions of seeing you again. Maybe you should have known better. He has the bad boy persona just from his stature, but maybe for once you wanted to believe you could get excited about someone again. Maybe he was the distraction you hoped for and needed, and now that your nerves are shot, and your heart is aching from all the emotions, you’ll do anything at this point to rid of it all.
Regretfully forgetting your drink at the bar and realizing after you move to another section of the place, you happen to see Jimin whose face lights up with recognition. Air escapes your lungs yet again because you forgot how attractive he is too. You notice he has been conversing with none other than Kim Seokjin which makes you want to faint since he is so famous and you have yet to meet a famous person, but for right now, despite the tears wanting to spill down your cheeks from the interaction with Namjoon and the acceptance that Jeongguk will not be showing up after all, you are so thankful that Jimin is making his way towards you. Until your emotions settle, you cannot risk humiliating yourself in front of a celebrity of Seokjin’s status. It would be too much.
Your jaw almost drops though when you catch a sudden glimpse of your coworker LenLen who is snug against a man with fluffy hair a short distance away, and you realize that this must be the man she’s been talking to you about! You tell yourself that you will make sure to say hey to her if you get the chance. It’s about time other conversation is shared that is not related exclusively to work.
“Hey there!” Jimin smiles fully, bringing your muddled mind back to attention. He leans in for a quick hug before pulling away. “You look amazing!”
Blushing, you feel where his fingers stop at your elbows. He has such a kind aura about him that makes you feel safe, so you hope he invites you to hang out, especially since LenLen happens to be in the group Jimin has been socializing with from your quick assumptions. “You look good, too!” You feel like you’re shouting, but you don’t care. You are somewhat relieved to finally have somebody to hang out with no matter how quick it lasts. “How is the opening going? Everything go according to plan?”
“Hell, yeah it has!” Jimin beams. “Taehyung is beyond happy with the results. The line outside is insanity!”
“So happy for you both!” You say, and before you think you may have some form of solace, you wonder where Namjoon is or if he miraculously left, but instead of him, you notice someone else. And you beg the heavens on why you can’t seem to catch a break.
Heart shattering to the floor, your eyes widen, and if Jimin is chatting, you definitely can’t hear him over the loud pounding of your heart in your temples. Is this the real reason Namjoon approached you? That he tried to stop you? To warn you?  
If the forbidden person you are frozen by sees you, you don’t care, you need a reason for his heart to break. Something worse than him finding out that you slept with his best friend if he ever does. Hoseok pauses the moment he sees you standing there; a strange look of confusion dawns him instantly as his eyes look from you to Jimin and back. You can’t help the way your gaze automatically drifts to see if you find her, too. The girl he chose over you, but you do not see a female near him. Not yet. You tell yourself that you never want to know who she is, but there is always that sick vengeance of discovering.
Jimin’s eyebrow arches as he follows your gaze. Whether he knows Hoseok or not, that part is the least of your concerns. Jeongguk stood you up, Namjoon confronted you, and your ex-boyfriend who you loved for three years that relentlessly ripped your heart out of your chest- is here and it is too overwhelming to describe right now the full-blown panic shredding every fiber of your being; the utter disbelief how this shit show of a night has unfolded. You wish you were drunk enough to ignore this inexplainable pain. You wish you had a place to escape to.
But… Maybe Jimin is it. If Jeongguk didn’t want to be, then maybe Jimin will.
Despite his furrowed eyebrows, when Jimin turns just enough to look at you, it’s all it takes. Briskly, you cup his face, pressing a kiss to his cloud-like lips while he stumbles in surprise. Relief floods your quivering frame when he doesn’t even remotely hesitate to kiss you back. His lips are enticingly soft and pure, and he tilts his head to deepen the kiss letting the tip of his tongue brush yours ever so slightly. He tastes of peppermint and booze, and he tastes so good, you get tipsy just off his lips. You move your hands to lock behind his neck while his fingers find a hold on your waist. “Well damn,” he says breathless against your lips while peppering short kisses in between his words. “If I would have known, I would have done this much sooner.”
Gripping loose strands on the back of his head, you lift onto the tips of your toes. “You won’t regret it,” you purr into Jimin’s ear, gaze tauntingly floating to stare right into Hoseok’s, whose eyes widen in enormous shock, before Jimin pins you to his frame as if your clothes are a barrier he wishes didn’t exist. Everywhere is too crowded to really notice the way you two lock lips for majority of the evening. And you are well aware that you two are not the only ones making out.
You know Hoseok is watching every second, probably fuming, probably balling his fists, probably justifying every reason he has to interrupt. You hope he is watching every grip of Jimin’s fingers on your ass, the way his lips suck your neck, or the way he twirls your body under the spotlight if a song he likes comes on. You know the jealousy that’s bubbling beneath Hoseok’s chest is about to erupt. But he also knows better than to intervene between the woman he betrayed and who he is assuming to be her new boyfriend. Because it’s too late. You wouldn’t take him back even if he begged. Because whoever she is out there, she knows what she did to you, too. How she couldn’t even show her face when Hoseok burst onto the porch the day you found out. How her breasts were rounded beneath Hoseok’s shirt. The shirt you painfully remembered was missing when you finally had a moment where your emotions didn’t get the best of you. She had that shirt the entire time.
You hadn’t planned to invite Jimin over. The night drives on and you see that Jeongguk at this point, indeed, read your message, but didn’t bother to respond. Didn’t bother to even make an excuse. To explain why he left you to unintentionally fend for yourself. He could have been here. He could have saved you from tonight if he wanted to. But he didn’t.
You hop into Jimin’s car willingly and he drives you home, kissing you and kissing you while your clothes hit the bedroom floor. Jimin slides on a condom before he pushes into you from behind when your body pins to the wall, him pounding as if to the beat of a song while his teeth dig into your shoulder, into your neck. “Deeper!” You squeal. “Keep going, ah-!”
You do not care about the sounds that have echoed from either of your mouths or the number of positions you two have attempted. You lost count after four. You don’t care that you just met him a few weeks ago. You don’t care how you are going to feel in the morning. Yes, you are aware that you are sober this time. But you want Jimin to keep moving inside you until you forget about your one-night stand with your ex’s best friend. Till you forget about Hoseok’s betrayal that haunts your mind and shreds your heart. Till you forget about the girl who took part in ruining your life. Till you forget about the tattooed man who you hoped would rescue you.
Cigs.
Fuck you, Cigs.
-
The morning comes quickly coupled with a pounding headache while you groggily stretch your arms and legs amidst the tangled bed sheets. You accidentally brush warm skin causing you to jolt upright. Wincing, the pounding in your head worsens, yet you turn just enough to assess that you one hundred percent just hooked up with the hot driver who co-owns a bar and is best friends with a celebrity.
Fuck.
Your palms slap to your face. You weren’t even intoxicated, so how could you let this happen? You may not have been drunk off your ass, but you sure as hell were emotional and that can be equally as dangerous as taking shots of the strongest alcoholic beverage out there. “Shit,” you murmur to yourself, watching the slow fall and rise of Jimin’s breathing. Kenai chirps outside your bedroom door and you realize it is probably past his breakfast time. Slipping out of bed as quietly as you can, you freshen up and brush your teeth. Twice. Just in case if you ultimately decide to continue this rendezvous before you kick Jimin out.
Shuddering, you wonder how loud you might have been last night. And by that you mean, was your sister home? And did she hear the commotion you let out the second you got Jimin alone? If she was home maybe, you could handle that truth. What also concerns you is if Yoongi was home too. You couldn’t bear facing the two of them if they were home while you tackled Jimin like a football player between the sheets.
Oh, when will all this humiliation end!? You want to scream outwardly. It’s been never ending. And, when you start to dress into a nightgown, you finger at the red mark on your shoulder. A reminder of where Jimin had been. And you hate that you like it.
Leaving the bathroom trying to rid the thought, you see Jimin is fully awake and putting on his shirt, his pants already hugging his toned legs. His hair is unkempt from the night before, and it looks cuter that way with his array of colors dyed with the blonde. “Hey there,” he smiles brightly when he sees you. You notice him pop a piece of gum in his mouth which you figure is because he never planned to bring a toothbrush… Because he hadn’t planned to sleep with anybody until you ferociously pounced.
“Hey,” You reply softly, crossing your arms to lean against the door frame of the bathroom. Kenai is still meowing outside the bedroom, frequently pawing at the door.
“Somebody’s pissed.” Jimin chuckles, pointing at the door.
“He’s starving 24/7 and likes to remind me just as often.” You kid, eventually stepping to sit on the bed. You aren’t sure how to feel about last night. But at the same time, should you regret it? The way Jimin’s eyes swept your body, to be honest, you kind of don’t regret it. “How did you sleep?” You try to make small talk to prevent any uneasy friction.
“Wonderfully.” He smiles again. “I hope you did?” He stands, rounding the bed to gently take a seat next to you. The smell of mint from his gum wafting to you tempting you to taste it.
“I did.” You return his smile, leaning in to touch a small kiss to his plush lips. Your headache is starting to dull some which makes you feel better. “Thank you for last night. I had fun.” You lean your forehead against his cheek as he leans back into you.
“I had fun, too.” He says quietly. Taking in a deep breath, he stands as you follow suit. “I better get going. Taehyung has been blowing up my phone wondering where I am. Really, I mean it when I say I had fun. Maybe… we can link up again soon?”
Hand in hand, you lead him to the front door while Kenai excitingly runs his furry body against both of your legs. Giggling, you kiss Jimin some more, “I’d like that.” A couple more kisses and you smile against his lips, “See ya.”
“See ya.” He nods, kissing your cheek one last time before taking off. As much as you wish that your heart would be soaring through the sky: it doesn’t. All your head can seem to obsess over is why Jeongguk stood you up. Was it all a game? Just to get a high that a girl wanted him, just for him to leave her stranded. What gives? In the end, is it really worth the explanation? You are so sick of getting screwed over.
“Who was that?”
“GAH!” You jump causing Kenai to dash wherever he can to hide. Your heart nearly stopped beating and your hand flies to your chest with relief when you see the teasing stare of your sister, Monnie.
“Monnie! For goodness sakes, you scared the fuck out of me!”
“Well!?” Monnie, not missing a beat, bellows. “Who was he!?”
“Nobody.” That is your first response as if you need a defense mechanism.
“Nobody!? With the animalistic sounds I heard last night, you have the absolute nerve to tell me that was nobody!?”
“He’s… He’s a guy I met a few weeks ago,” you try to reply while your heartbeat attempts to calm.
“He is cute,” she coos. “Like smooth like butter cute. Like the butter you slab on a piece of crisp toast cute. He can make anybody feel warm and fuzzy. Girl, I’m telling you right now-”
“Okay, we get it! I know.” You aren’t sure how to cope with the chagrin reddening your cheeks, or the dulling headache on top of it, but you manage somehow. “Please tell me Yoongi isn’t here.”
“Lucky for you he’s at a conference and has been since yesterday afternoon, so he didn’t hear a thing. I was supposed to go but I got-” She mimics what is supposed to be a cough into her hand. “Sick.”
“Oh! You are ridiculous!”
“It’s called, my sister brought home a cute guy for the first time in a decade, and I must hear all about it.”
“Nope!” You say trying to brush past her. “By the way, it’s only been a year.”
“Not anymore-!”
“Gah!” You clap back, slamming your bedroom door, and diving onto your bed, the mattress bounces your body while you scream heavily into a pillow. The scent of Jimin is everywhere in your room still and your sister’s voice keeps rattling on about how she just wants you to be happy and that you deserve to be even though in your heart, you have no idea when that day will come. Eventually you will confide in her about everything, but for now you will bury your face into the pillow and let the tears flow until you fall back asleep.
-
Monnie reluctantly gives you space, but only because she has ‘somewhere to be,’ and she is ‘not going to let you make her late.’ So, she says. You give Kenai an extra bit of food in hopes to win back his forgiveness and you dress out of the nightgown considering another trip to the coffee shop. Your eyes burn slightly from the crying earlier. After last night, you happen to note that you never got Jimin’s number which is probably a good thing so he can avoid the hot mess of thoughts spinning profusely in your mind. Between seeing Namjoon and Hoseok last night and hooking up with Jimin, you can hardly imagine what the two could have said after seeing, not only you, but you sucking faces with another guy. Though it’s nice to have male attention from time to time, you didn’t expect it all to unravel at once.
Some people would make you feel so stupid for your actions while others would praise you for being so bold and independent. You’re single and you can do whatever you want. Are you really mad that you hooked up with Jimin last night? Out of desperation for running into your ex? Or are you more broken about Jeongguk standing you up, and ashamed that you are upset about it when you only have seen him twice?
You can’t help the way you feel. You inhale and exhale deeply. Running from your thoughts is all you want right now.
Entering the coffee shop, you ordered a cab and left a tip because you really despise driving, and here you are in line eventually ordering the same drink you got last time. Why you feel to look for Jeongguk, you wish you didn’t. Training your eyes to focus on what is in front of you- you grip the coffee cup once it’s placed on the counter, and you find a small table in the back away from as many people as you can avoid.
He has his reasons, but you really hope that the reasons weren’t to play with your feelings purposefully. Even though that’s exactly what it looks like. Inwardly, you accept that you probably will never see him again, and you also convince yourself that maybe Jeongguk really was a figment of your imagination. The messages on your phone will say otherwise, but for now, with the hot liquid of your coffee stinging your tongue, you will continue convincing yourself that he is a simple figment of your imagination.  
That thought lasts about thirty minutes, when your coffee is halfway downed and the view of a tatted hand glides upon the table where you feel your throat shrink. No fucking way. You keep your gaze on your coffee cup, the faint smell of a cigarette wafts in your direction and you refuse to look at him. Anger blares inside you. You can tell he is gradually taking the seat across from you because it is pretty evident how rigid you are in response to his presence. He can tell you are annoyed. Maybe even furious.
“Hey…” He forces once he scoots the chair closer to the table. You stay silent. “Look, I-”
“What do you want?” You look up finally. His look is firm, but guilt stricken all at the same time. He presses his lips together. “No, really. Amuse me.” You wave a hand at him. “Was it a one night stand you wanted? Because you could have just asked.”
His eyes enlarge but only slightly. “No. No, that’s definitely not-”
“Then what? What do you want?” You rarely give him a chance to speak before you start gathering your things. To prevent unwanted attention, you toss the coffee cup into the trash can on your way out, Jeongguk on your heels. Marching toward the sidewalk that you can follow back to the city; you huff in exasperation when you feel his hand curl around your arm.
“Let go of me!” You say loudly, thrusting your arm away from him.
“Look, I’m sorry, okay. Just- just let me explain-”
“Oh, go fuck yourself.” You try to walk away.
“y/n. Please.”
You thought you lost your shit last night when you attacked Jimin’s mouth in front of Hoseok. And you thought you lost your shit this morning when you sobbed into your pillow. But this anger and desperation and sadness that you have kept pent up since the day you discovered Hoseok’s infidelity is about to explode. And it’s about to explode in what you know will embarrass you for the rest of your life. Or… it just flat out won’t.
Scoffing, you pause, spinning to face Jeongguk, whose hands raise as if to calm you down, but you are far from calm. “You know what?” You say slowly. “That whole spiel about how I deserve to be respected was a whole load of bullshit wasn’t it?” You step forward making it clear that you aren’t done speaking, and though Jeongguk claimed weeks ago that he wasn’t scared of anything, there is the slightest hint of fear you gather in his eyes though he straightens to let his arms hang loosely at his sides. “I’m starting to think there’s no such thing anymore. First, after three years, with who I thought was the absolute love of my life, three years, he cheats on me with some chick I still to this day do not know who she is or how the fuck they met. So, for unplanned revenge, I fucked his best friend and guess what!?” You throw your hands up, “They both were at the bar last night. Both. Of. Them. How the fuck does that happen!? I move to the city to run away from my problems, and they follow me anyway. They fucking follow me as if I need that reminder. As if I need to relive that heartbreak over and over again. As if I deserve it- to have it thrown in my face.” Running your hands through your hair, you choke back a sob. You refuse to cry in front of this man who is basically a stranger but not really. You don’t notice the remorse showing in his eyes after revealing your limited yet very detailed confession. How he could have easily prevented this.
“I meet you once, and for the first time in a year, I finally know what it’s like to be excited again. To have something to potentially look forward to.” You laugh one syllable. “And yet, I don’t fucking know a single thing about you. Where you’re from, where you work, why you suddenly start coming to this coffee shop when I have never seen you there before, and I keep beating myself up for being so damned hurt about this when you’re a total stranger.” You can’t even look him in the eyes. “And there you are, completely leaving me stranded in a bar when you said you’d fucking be there. Respect, my ass. Have a nice life, Cigs.”
“You do deserve respect.” Oh, why do you pause? “I fucked up last night, okay!? I um…” He trails off, shaking his head as if to rid of whatever he originally was going to say. “Something came up-”
“Is that what it’s going to be every single time!? Something came up!?”
He winces when he acknowledges how bad it seems. “Look I- I know how it sounds. Please. Just let me make it up to you.”
Scanning him from his styled hair to the charcoal color of his boots, the thrilling sense of lust clouds your frame simultaneously to your mouth watering. It takes everything in you not to rush forward and cling onto him as if your life depends on it. But, at the same time, you see a guy who completely ghosted you on a night you may have needed his company most. And, if he was willing to do that to you last night, why wouldn’t he do it again?
The anger is still written all over your face and your demeanor. Sneering, your lips curl.
“No.”
And you stomp off toward whatever destination you hope to find as you did a year ago when you ran from disappointment. You wonder how it feels for him to see you walk away this time.
-
It doesn’t matter the day or the hour. Every time you step foot into the same coffee shop, he’s there. Jeongguk is there. Sitting a table away, keeping his eyes on you. Waiting for you to cave. You have ignored every single message he has sent. Every call he has attempted. Yet, you are also fighting the urge to just be near him. Give him another chance. Maybe it’s the fact that you truly do want to know where he was the night, he stood you up. But is it worth knowing the truth? The only thing you didn’t mention the last time you spoke to Jeongguk was the one night stand you had with Jimin. Not that it was any of Jeongguk’s business, but still. You don’t want to appear like sex with strangers is something you do all the time, because it’s not. And even if it was, it’s nobody’s business but yours.
You decide to walk the city. If he follows you there, then so be it. Compiling your things, you head out onto the sidewalk, letting the breeze nip your skin. The recent memory of LenLen asking about Jimin and you trying your best to answer her questions without blushing replays. She told you about Taehyung and how him and Jimin are best friends which you happened to already know and you relay to her how happy you are that she found Taehyung. You also apologize that you didn’t get to say hello, but she winks at you for she witnessed the reason why.
When you start reaching the city, you hardly can believe the huge sign, flashing upon the tallest building, of Hoseok’s face which roots your feet to the cement while tears spring in response. Cursing under your breath, you realize that one of the books he had been working on back when you two were together must have been released, the one he continuously spoke about. The one inspired from the script he hoped Kim Seokjin would film a movie with. The one that began with you. Which means, if it has become a success, then now you are going to see his face everywhere you turn. And, if the movie is made, that’s even more publicity Hoseok will gain and even more often you will have to see his face. The more hurt you will endure.
“Damnit,” you want to sob. Out of all the places you think to turn, you flee into the bookstore just to almost collide with a book stand filled from top to bottom with Hoseok’s novel. Fret overpowers your system, and you rush out the doors the second you see it, and you figure maybe walking home, no matter the distance, will help clear the stress out of you. Even though you know it won’t. Because at this point, you give up being in public.
You nearly slam into a figure from your rushed state and when the whiff of a cigarette mingled with cologne greets your nose, you know exactly who you’ve run into. “Why are you doing this.” It’s not a question, it’s a statement. “Why are you following me, Asshole? Did I not make myself clear?”
“I told you I wanted to make it up to you.”
“And I told you no from what I recall.”
“I have short term memory loss.”
“Oh, go fuck yourself, Nemo-”
“I’d prefer if you joined me.”
“You really are asking to get smacked.”
“I like it rather rough.”
“And I’d like for you to leave me the hell alone.”
“Not until you hear me out.”
“And why should I?”
His eyes flit between yours, “Because I can’t let it go. I messed up.”
“You don’t deserve my forgiveness if that’s what you’re implying. To be honest, it’s ridiculous that I’m even mad about it to begin with. I don’t even know you.”
“See, but you have every right to be. You should be mad.”
“Okay. Well then accept that I’m pissed at you and move on.”
“I shan’t.”
You could laugh. You almost laugh. But you hold it together because you can’t just let him think he can get away with how he just randomly leaves you stranded. When you both almost kissed in the alley way, you could sense that his desire was as solid as yours. He acted as if he wanted you. So, why did he just walk away? What is the point in pursuing someone who will always walk away?
Shoving past him, you wish you would have driven this go round so a route of escape would be available. But unfortunately, you didn’t think this through. The only place you can think of is the garden center above the bookstore that you have only visited every now and then this past year. What of Hoseok could possibly be up there? A mural? Stalking in the direction of the building, you avoid making eye contact with the huge ad about your ex, and eventually round the store to find the elevator. There are only a few floors before you reach the top and once you elbow the button to awaken the elevator, the last thing you expect is Jeongguk to follow you right in when the large doors slide open. But honestly you should have expected it.
You elbowed the button for the top floor where the smell of flowers waits for you, but you can’t ignore the tension simmering once the doors close. You bite the corner of your lip in agony, the ding of the elevator agonizingly slow. “I know you’re not about to stop and smell the roses, Eyebrow.” Referring to his eyebrow piercing that makes your insides lustfully shiver, you’re shocked he takes all your nicknames so well, but then you remember you’re supposed to be mad at him. “Why can’t you just take a hint?”
His finger presses to your lips, vanishing your words as he seductively shushes you. And he shifts to stand in front of you, his nose dangerously tickling the side of your cheek while your body fights to not react to the arousal forming below. He whispers, “I don’t need a hint to know that you want me just as much as I want you.” Whimpering, your eyes trace his face, the way his jaw curves, the way his eyes set firmly to you with no intention of moving. Did you hear him correctly? Did he just admit that he, in fact, wants you too? “So,” he continues, slipping his finger away from your lips, he brings his mouth to yours while you sigh in pleasure. Fuck. Your body begs for him to close the gap. Begs for him to kiss you. But he doesn’t. Not yet. “I suggest you behave yourself if you want to keep me tame.”
He is doing to you what you did to him that day in the coffee shop making an effort to seduce him. But this time, he is winning more than you are letting on. When the ding of the elevator brings attention to the opening doors, Jeongguk sighs, “We’re not going there.” Reaching back to hit whatever button he chooses; you don’t even move to see. He can take you wherever he wants, and you could smack yourself for conceding.
“What do you mean?” You murmur, swallowing the lump in your throat.
“I um,” he tilts his head as if embarrassed. “I live here. So, we’re going to the third floor.”
“Excuse me, what?” Your mind is trying to make the connection how it’s possible that he lives on the third floor of your favorite bookstore smack dab in the city. You’ve heard of people who have homes above the places they own, so… Does that mean Jeongguk owns the bookstore? You thought he said his stepbrother owns it? His hand finds yours when the doors slide open again, showing shelves upon shelves of books with sparse customers quietly reading or viewing the array of covers.
Your brain cells are racing but never reaching a finish line as your eyes frantically scan the hallway the pair of you are entering. You try to appreciate the feel of Jeongguk’s hand holding yours, warm and firm and surprisingly safe though you wish you hadn’t lost the will to fight. Why is it so easy for him to melt your anger away? To melt your sadness? To heighten your senses.
He scans something, you assume a card, before opening a large door, flipping on the lights to show an area of simplicity and barely any furniture to decorate once you step inside. The scent is new as if it has just been built, but you know that is impossible considering this bookstore has been around for years. Automatically, you both kick off your shoes. “My stepbrother used to live here before, so I moved in.” He says as if reading your mind. “That’s why there’s not much here, but there’s enough to keep comfortable.” He gestures toward a sofa awkwardly sitting in the middle of what you assume is the living room and loud meows start echoing the second you see a few cat towers sprawled out. Flounder and Tetra.
“I remember you saying he owns a bookstore… it’s here?” You say in disbelief as the cats come flying to greet you and Jeongguk. How can you be mad anymore when these sweet little fluff puffs are rubbing against your legs, mewing for attention? Jeongguk giggles while he tries to bring back the conversation.  
He shrugs, unintentionally dismissing the sexual tension that concocted in the elevator only seven minutes ago now that the cats are out and about. “He’s an actor now. He took over when his dad retired.”
“…What do you do?” You’re quiet and you don’t mean to be, but you’ve been struggling with mixed emotions for what seems like an eternity. At this point, you accept if this is a dream versus reality.
“Nothing,” he says after a moment, head looking downward. You lick your lips when your eyebrows furrow, but strangely you understand this shame. If your sister didn’t have money, you’d be homeless. Your parents live far away, and in all honesty, you don’t truly talk to them as often as you should. You work part time at a retail store because you can’t seem to get your shit together enough to work full time otherwise, you’d be in the same boat… you’d be doing just that. Nothing. “I used to work as a tattoo artist before I moved here, but um… you may find this hard to believe, but I got my heart broken by someone I fell in love with when I was eighteen.”
“You?” You croak. You mean it to come off as a joke but fail miserably. He finally tilts his head up, softly grinning.
“Yes, a tatted asshole that wears leather and smokes cigs can be capable of falling in love and getting heartbroken instead of causing the heartbreak, Macchiato… Happy?”
Why this vulnerability is happening is unbeknownst to you, but you are very happy that he seems to be opening up. He all but admitted he wants you, too. So, the least he can do is try. Try letting you see past the mystery. Try staying instead of leaving. Saying hello instead of goodbye.
“How long were you two together?” You may have spilled the beans of how long you were with Hoseok, not that Jeongguk knows who he is, but three years is a long time.
“Five years. Found out she cheated on me, too… I lost myself for a long time. Ended up at a different girl’s house every week to numb the pain and never called them back the next day. Became addicted to smoking cigarettes. Went to parties quite a bit… Got drunk, you name it… Moved here with my children the second Jin told me I could. That’s when I finally calmed down and realized, I needed to change before it got worse.”
“I’m so sorry… Sometimes people underestimate the pain of a breakup. Especially if you were with them for such a long time as you were.” It’s quiet a little longer than you mean for it to be, but the similarity of how the two of you got your heart broken is an odd coincidence. But then you gasp when a lightbulb clicks. “Jin!? As in, Seokjin?”
“Yeah?” He says unhurriedly. “Is that hard for you to believe?”
“What? No! I’m just- the Kim Seokjin is your stepbrother? He owns this bookstore?”
“Well yeah, he’s the reason the bills are paid for now until I, myself, can get my shit together.”
You know the concentration it takes to complete a puzzle? Well, this is one of those times. Randomly, you wonder. Does Jeongguk know Jimin since Seokjin knows Jimin?
“Do you know who Jimin is?” You spit out. How are all these male specimens connected? Either way, you are definitely not telling Jeongguk about the rendezvous with Jimin that’s for sure.
His eyebrows scrunch and you visibly witness the way his shoulders rigidify as if he knows exactly who you are talking about. “How do you know Jimin?”
“No reason, just wondering. I saw him hanging out with Seokjin at the bar you failed to show up to.”
“Hm.” He hums once. “Interesting.”
“He co-owns the bar with a guy named Taehyung…  My co-worker is dating him. Taehyung, I mean.” You’re having a hard time reading Jeongguk’s expression, but he attempts to not be so uptight.
“Did you… See anybody else there?”
His question hits you by surprise, but you know there is no way he could be referring to Hoseok and Namjoon… Could he? No, of course not. He wasn’t there. He doesn’t know who your ex is specifically. You may have mentioned your ex and your ex’s best friend were at the bar, but you had never given any names. It’s as if Jeongguk is asking solely about someone else… But who?
Pushing your fingertips to your forehead, you release an exasperated sigh. “Can I use your restroom?” You need a moment to yourself. All this unwanted ‘solving’ isn’t getting you anywhere. And why is Jeongguk being so weird about Jimin? He doesn’t know about the hook up and Jeongguk is also not your boyfriend, so why does it matter?
“Yeah, this way,” he points in the direction of what you assume is his bedroom. “On the right.”
The door gently clicks behind you while your palms cling onto the counter when you’re securely within the bathroom. It’s huge. You can tell it’s spacious by the fact you can breathe amidst the anxiety. A jacuzzi and a walk-in shower, a door that you are confident is a towel closet is what you take in once you twirl around. It’s beautiful and so clean, it’s as if nobody has inhabited it in a long time. Either way, you don’t want to take too long, so you pull out a small bottle of mouth wash and complete a brisk breathing exercise before filing out into Jeongguk’s bedroom.
You hadn’t taken time to notice how large his bed is either. The covers are invitingly dark, and you can tell from the curtains that are slightly split show the windows to a magnificent view of the city. Whoever Seokjin’s dad had to construct this place was an absolute genius. A home inside a bookstore, that would be a dream come true for millions.
You brace yourself when you step into the living room, and you notice Jeongguk is preparing wine glasses, a bottle of red is in his hand as he begins to pour the crimson liquid. His cats are munching on some food that he put to keep them occupied. You can tell by his body language that he is going to change the subject regarding Jimin. “How did you know?” You say ultimately when you pull out a stool in front of the counter.
“Nothing a good bit of wine can’t fix.” He winks. “Plus, I figured it will calm the nerves, so we can actually… talk.”
You nod reluctantly, fingers pressing beneath the glass before you take a slow sip. The taste is sour with the mouth wash, but you know after a few sips that will change. A wave of calm floods your chest and limbs once you swallow. “Thank you.” You murmur. He leans on the counter instead of moving to take a seat next to you. He can’t take his eyes off you, and he can’t even explain how just being around you makes him feel. You bring a comfort he hasn’t had in a long time. He knows he has gone about it the wrong way, but he is determined to not let you go this time. No matter how much his ex keeps trying to reach out to win him back. He wants you.
“I’m really sorry about the bar.” He manages to say. He’s not the best with apologies, but he knows you deserve one. “That was really fucked up. I shouldn’t have done that.”
“No… You shouldn’t have.” You’re honest because you know what it’s like to be betrayed. Jeongguk of all people should get it too after admitting that he has been cheated on before as you have. You must stand your ground regardless of how weak he secretly makes you because no, this specific situation may not be seen as a betrayal, but it was not okay that he left you there alone. He does, however, want to confess everything, of why he didn’t show up. But something keeps telling him that it’s too soon. When he’s ready, he plans to tell you. But for now, he wants to prove to you that he’s not going anywhere this time.
“I know,” he murmurs.
Taking a longer sip of the wine, you rub at your eyes. “He really did some damage…” You admit, appreciating how easy it is for the pair of you to start opening up. This is something you have battled to talk about since the day you witnessed it. “I mean three years of my life I gave to this guy, and he just…” You throw your hand up. “He just throws every bit of it down the drain. There wasn’t even the slightest red flag. I came home. Heard them in the bedroom… Our bedroom. And I just-” You didn’t want to cry, but the tears greet you with the burn of your nose. “I just left. I don’t even know how long it had been going on. All I know is I blocked him on everything and refuse to give him the time of day. Because I can’t bring myself to face him. Or the pain of it all.” Jeongguk listens contently, sorrow filling his umber eyes. “When I saw him at the bar for the first time in a year, the anger that filled me at first, I wanted to do anything to make him feel the same devastation I felt that day. Sure, I slept with his best friend weeks after the breakup, but he doesn’t know that. And, as much as I want to say the revenge was satisfying… It wasn’t.” You tap your fingers on the counter. “Now I’m here. I’m here in this city, living with my rich sister, and working a part time job. It’s like I want to live in my misery… At least, I have my cat.” You smile, Kenai’s sweet face bringing you peace.
“It takes a long time to move on from something like that. What happened to me was nearly two years ago and it still hurts.” Jeongguk says because he knows exactly how that feels. He still succumbed to his ex’s every beck and call until he met you. That’s when everything started changing for him. Why he couldn’t think straight. When his ex was trying to distract him, his mind was filled with you. “I saw the guy she was cheating with once. I planned to confront him, but… chickened out. I knew if I wasn’t careful, I’d do something I’d regret.”
“Who was he?” You ask. Jeongguk raises his shoulders, pursing his lips.
“I don’t know his name. Just that Seokjin was working on a movie, happened to meet the guy and my girlfriend at the time was with him. Jin put two and two together and called me right after. He recognized her in some of the pictures I posted on social media before I deleted it all.”
“He’s an actor, too? The guy she was with?” You wonder.
“I’m assuming.” He speaks. “She never really met Jin before. Or at least, I never told her specifically that he was my stepbrother. That was a part of my life I tried to keep distant, but when he called me concerned, I knew why she was coming home so late. Or, why she didn’t panic if she knew Jin was my brother who was seeing her in the flesh with another dude.” Jeongguk wets his lips. “And that’s when he tried to help me cope by giving me his apartment here when he saw how far gone, I had gotten. And that’s why she learned to do research on who I’m connected to because apparently me and Seokjin know everybody due to his fame and fortune.” He means the fame and fortune as a joke, but you still ponder.
“So…” Your expression confused. “If that’s the case, how do you know Jimin?”
Jeongguk swallows roughly, “I asked you first.”
Now, it’s your turn to gulp. “About that.” The stool screeches from under you as you immediately stand, chugging every last drop of your wine before you clutch your things to your side. The indent Jimin left on your shoulder has faded some, but it still befuddles you knowing Jeongguk could clue in if he wanted to. “I-I have to go.” You really don’t, but the way your entire body is flushing, and your eyes are wide with panic. What else are you supposed to do? Running is what you do best. As if a lightbulb goes off, Jeongguk’s laugh reverberates behind you.
“Wait a minute, have you banged him?” Halt. You choke completely on your own spit; your trachea insults you while you cough up a storm. Goodness gracious. Why this? Why now? “You totally banged him didn’t you!? Holy shit.”
“So, what if I have?” You stifle another cough whirling to face him. “What the hell are you going to do about it?”
That’s when the air between you two immediately silences as if you gave him the challenge of a lifetime. Not even Tetra or Flounder are around to fill in the void. It’s as if you both are back in the elevator where the temptation became so alive, it was hard to ignore. It was irresistible. The only sound is your breathing as it increases after Jeongguk’s wine glass clinks against the counter. There’s a prolonged few seconds before it all becomes thunderous.  He makes his way to you as your purse slips from your quivering arm. Your breathing stops. His fingertips press to touch to the skin of your chest as he tickles circles. His eyes flit from your parting lips to the way your eyes start to show you’re imploring for him to not stop. He taunts you. Edging so close to you, his lips are barely on yours when he whispers, “I’m going to make you forget he exists.”
This time, you’re not letting him walk away from you. Not again. Not ever. Your palm finds itself gripping his shirt while you close the gap. The millisecond Jeongguk’s lips connect with yours, it’s electrifying. It’s as if somebody injected fireworks into your veins, shooting across your skin and awakening your senses ten times the normal, exploding across your mind, body, and soul. Your heart pounds so loud, you’re shocked if he doesn’t hear it. You’ve been with three other guys sexually prior to Jeongguk, but something about this is mystifying. Powerful.
His mouth moves with yours as you gasp into his kiss, letting him guide you until the back of your legs recognizes the arm of the sofa. His hand moves to tangle into your hair while you deepen the kiss, the tip of his tongue finding yours as he caresses it simultaneously taking his free hand to slip into the front of your pants, but you’re not ready for him to pleasure you yet. You want to show him what he will miss out on if he doesn’t choose you in the end. But you weaken when his heated lips press slowly and gently along your jawline, the arousal you feel drips, his fingers sliding further to slip past your underwear until he runs his fingertips up and down your heat.
“Oh,” he moans with a slight growl burying his face into your neck from how drenched you already are for him. “Holy fuck,” he hisses, trying to keep himself tame. You love the sound of his fingers sloshing up and down against you. But you want it to be you on him.
Shoving him back to give you some space, his hand flies from your pants and he watches you not expecting you to kneel. And not expecting you to fumble undoing his belt, tugging it out of his belt loops, he hisses in response to the point you see his bulge prominently inside his pants. Oh, the way your mouth waters instinctively at the sight of his erection.
Unbuttoning his pants, you yank them down to his ankles, releasing his erection from his underwear where you hum pleasurably at his girth. Your hands run along his thighs seductively; his eyes darken with lust as you connect with them naughtily. Your palm then slides around his length, stroking him agonizingly slow before you take him into your mouth. Letting his precum welcome your taste buds before you hollow your cheeks, the warm skin of his being ignites your arousal even more. His large hand moves to the top of your head where your strands tangle between his tatted fingers. That’s when you begin, bobbing back and forth as speedily as you can, basking in his moans at how amazing you feel. Your hands cling to the bottom of his jacket while you continue your bliss eventually releasing him from your mouth to push him onto the couch where his back plops upon the cushions.
You push his shirt up to visualize his toned abdomen before dipping down to continue sucking, moving your other hand to massage his scrotum, giving him every bit of pleasure, you can to make him crave you. To make him pine for you. Another trick is up your sleeve when your hand returns to his being, following up and down with your mouth while he tries every way not to cum before he gets the chance to pleasure you more. “Holy fuck,” He groans in satisfaction which makes you continue your fun.
Your tongue laps around his tip before you wipe the spittle at the corners of your lips away. When you’re about to continue, he raises, pulling you to his mouth as he kisses you more, becoming hungrier as he shifts you closer. You can tell your clothes are getting in his way for when he pauses, dazed, his hands start to tug at your pants, eventually freeing you from them as you help kick them off. The air in the apartment is colder than you realize. Goosebumps start flying down your legs as you try to regain your focus on removing the articles of clothing off Jeongguk’s top half. Eventually, all linens are plopped onto the floor and your naked bodies are starting to feel every inch of warm skin, captivating every sense, every cell, every emotion, every lustful bliss.
He pauses and you realize his fingertips have paused at the fading spot on your shoulder. The place where Jimin’s teeth sank in. Holding your breath, you see the guilt in Jeongguk’s eyes as his lips become ajar as if he wishes that it could have been him instead. You aren’t sure how to read what he is thinking, especially when he runs the tip of his thumb over the area. But, in the heat of the moment, his other hand slides to the back of your neck where he slightly grips the strands of your hair stimulating you to bite your lip. He tilts your head just enough to cover the spot with his own mouth, sucking harshly on the skin to place his mark. To regain his status. You’ve never seen something so hot, it’s sending immense tingles all through out your frame. He then sprinkles kisses across your chest eventually trailing to your breasts where his tongue flicks over your nipples and the top of his head tickles your chin. Your whimpers increase while he sucks each nipple tenderly, your fingers indenting his back, and the way your vaginal walls leak onto your vulva- you cannot wait for more of this man. Your eyes sweep his figure. His tattoos covering the entirety of his arm.
Goodness, his body is ethereal, and from the way he takes in the view of you bare, you can tell he feels the exact same about you. Your lips tingle for his. Dragging him to you, he crashes his lips to yours, a new addiction you both know will be hard to break. The way his body presses to yours so passionately, it’s as if you have waited your whole life to feel this good. You can still feel the way his lips bruised you on your shoulder, and you adore the way it lingers.
“My turn!” His fingers deliciously dig into your hips, he slides you closer to him despite the limited room on the sofa, and his eyes absorb how sopping wet you are for him even still. He traces his hands to your thighs when you feel your heat clenching fervently for the desire that is taking over your system. Jeongguk wastes no time swiping a finger, sucking your leakage before his tongue starts lapping up every bit of your taste. What really catches you by surprise is how he continues the fast movements, flattening and pointing his tongue seeing which gesture makes you scream for him more. In between, he sucks your clit, taking one hand to reach for the spot above your clit where he massages nice and slow simultaneously while he feasts. “Oh, Guk,” you sigh with elation. “Oh, Guk, yes! Oh my gosh, yes, holy fuck, ah-”
You hardly can contain yourself with how this man is loving your body. He refuses to stop until you feel the powerful jolt of an orgasm, gratifyingly overwhelming your brain as your thighs squeeze together. Jeongguk already pulled away with pure ecstasy of watching you come undone for him. You are so dizzy; you can’t help the way your feet sink into the couch trying to overcome the sensitivity. When you try to shift, to sit up, Jeongguk hovers close to where he whispers, the smell of you reaching your nose.
“Keep your eyes closed,” he says against your lips, kissing you quickly before carefully lifting his body off you. His hands slide along your arms as he tenderly guides you. Before you can question, he interrupts by kissing you again. “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere. I’ve got a couple things I want to set up.” As much as you hate to admit it, your heat drips at the way he whispers this to you intensifying the elation. How many times does he plan to make you cum?
The anticipation as to what he’s about to do. What he’s about to show you. Your ears tune into the sounds of the refrigerator opening- his giddy footsteps jogging to the bedroom where you hear the start of running water. Not just a spritz from the shower… the jacuzzi. Holy fuck. When you thought of steamy sex, you never once thought about the jacuzzi. Your hands squeeze into your thighs, the sensitivity between your legs starting to dim. Your heat clenching around nothing as you feel your nipples bud against the chilled air now that his warm body hasn’t been wrapped around yours for a bit. You never really ventured with sex when you were with Hoseok. It was just the typical quickies before and after work depending on the mood with the occasional use of a vibrator. And with Namjoon, it was a drunken blur. With Jimin… It was just spicy vanilla with addictive kisses, but good enough to get the job done and not hesitate for a second round if there ever was to be a second round.
But with Jeongguk. He’s about to give you a night you hope to relive every moment you see him. When he steps into the living room after a few minutes, you had been biting your lip unintentionally, and you feel him kneeling when his tepid hands place on your knees to then gliding up your exposed thighs. He loves teasing you with his lips, talking against them to keep you on your toes. “I’m ready.” He whispers enticingly. You peel your eyes open, him holding your hands while he helps you stand.
When you enter behind him to his bedroom, you notice a golden bowl filled with ice cubes and bubbles from the jacuzzi mingled with steam is shown from where the bathroom door is open. “I didn’t know to buy rose petals and candles-”
“Oh, fuck that!” You gasp, grabbing his face to kiss him again and again. The excitement is so tremendous, his strong arms adhere you to his frame before he peppers kisses along your neck, sucking the skin before placing your back on his bed. Lifting your hands in surrender, he can have you however he wants. However, he needs you. His eyes trail to the ice cubes where he places one in his mouth taking a few long sucks. When you imagined ice play, you never thought you would actually get to experience it.
He then takes the ice and places it on your chest, the cold nips your skin in a pleasurable way and when he slides the cube onto one nipple then to the other, your shaky breaths echo within his bedroom. He then lets the cube glide downwards once your nipples stay budded till he pauses at the beginning of your vulva. “Do you want me, baby?”
“Yes!” You’re breathless, toes curling against the bed sheets, the cold of the frozen water bringing a subtle pain. “Yes, baby, please. I want you.” He lets the ice touch along your slit, causing your hips to rise involuntarily while he rubs it quickly, coating your heat with the chill. Just enough to absorb your taste. As you watch him intensely, he returns the cube to his mouth sucking more until he places it back into the bowl.
Without preparation, his hands, few fingertips cold, wrap around your thighs, shifting you to his starving mouth as he breathes in your scent. “You smell so good, baby.” He growls, his hair tickling your skin before his tongue starts to flick between your folds once more, the chill feel sending vibrations of desire up and down your body while you moan his name even higher than his previous feast. “Oh, Guk! Oh, baby! Holy fuck, you feel so good! Ah!” Your screams encourage him to flick faster, up and down his tongue presses, lapping up your juices while your hands dig into the comforter. Eyes rolling back, one by one, each of his hands reach to rub your nipples, rubbing so fondly while he licks you, making your arousal build even stronger, so intense, you can hardly breathe. His head makes swift movements while he continues to taste you furiously, not taking one moment to breathe himself. You feel another orgasm building, and before you can stop him, your hips buck to the amplifying sensation as the glint of you shines on his chin. He arches an eyebrow proudly as you melt against the comforter- completely and utterly gasping.
But he’s not done with you yet and you don’t want him to be.
He crawls onto the bed to hover above you, interlacing his fingers with yours that happen to untangle from squeezing the comforter. Still holding your hands, he then moves backwards, helping you up to lead you to the bathroom where he shuts the door behind him. Wherever he goes, you will follow. And so far, you are not regretting one bit.
The steam is still rising from the jacuzzi and when he pins you to the tub, he leans over you to press a button, the jets in the jacuzzi awaken and the entire bath is bubbling for you to enjoy. You smell yourself on his mouth, and when he kisses you again, this time it’s so loving. It’s soft. So mesmerizing, you can’t concentrate on anything else as his hands cup your breasts, rubbing your nipples so affectionately that your heat gushes below you as you moan helplessly against his mouth.
“Get in.” He demands and this newfound dominance is going to make you pounce. You tilt your head when you meet his knowing eyes.
“You first, Cigs.” His nose scrunching into the sweetest smile, you dizzyingly watch him step into the jacuzzi, letting the water engulf his frame before you find yourself joining, putting a leg on either side of his hips while you straddle him. His hands massage up and down your back slowly to gripping your ass. How much more stunning can this man be? When he said he was going to make you forget about the past, he wasn’t fucking kidding. And you are very much okay with that.
“You’re so beautiful.” He whispers suddenly and your heart swells at his words. Not only did he mean it, but you can feel how much he means it. It doesn’t take long for you to bring your lips to his after holding his gaze, eventually moving a hand to find his erection, posing above his length before he enters you causing you to gasp against his kiss before your body starts to move to the rhythm of his hips as he thrusts into you. The water splashes amidst your moans, him hitting your g-spot with every stroke.
Lips still locked to yours, Jeongguk wraps his arms around you before lifting you enough to lay your back against the other end of the jacuzzi. Water covers your body while the jets massage your skin as Jeongguk lingers above you, entering you once more, your arms hug behind his shoulders while he thrusts. His body molds so perfectly with yours, and you never felt so alive. His large hand moves to cradle the back of your head, kissing you so deeply that your head is spinning. You never want this to end. How he moves so beautifully within you. It’s enthralling. He is enthralling.
When he releases into you, the water washes him away, and he sighs into your neck while you two try to catch a breath.
“By the way, it’s Dory.”
Confusion hits you at his sudden, breathless remark. “What?”
“You called me Nemo. It’s supposed to be Dory. She has short term memory loss.”
Shoving him playfully, you splash water at him while giggles echo, him tackling you just to place kisses to your blushing face. You can’t imagine ever losing him at this point. For once, you feel promise even though a promise has never been made.
-
“You’re smiling.” Monnie says suspiciously as you dazingly exit your room.
“And that’s a bad thing?”
“It certainly is not. It’s about time you appreciate your life here.”
“I do appreciate it here.”
“Finally… Is it the blonde guy?”
Your eyes widen because you completely forgot that your sister has no idea about Jeongguk. “No!” You say quickly. “No, it’s not him.”
“Okay,” Monnie says slowly, placing her hands on her hips. “Well, something is making you act like a teenager, so spill it.”
“I will at some point just… Just not right now.”
Monnie groans in annoyance. “I don’t know what I have to do to get you to talk to me, but at some point, I need to know your life story.”
“But you do know most of it. We’re sisters, Genius.”
“The boring stuff. I want to hear the dirt. I’m nosy.”
“You wouldn’t be my sister if you weren’t.” You tease. “I will tell you everything when I am ready. It’s… a lot… Okay?”
Reluctantly, her arms loosen in defeat as she rolls her eyes, “Fine,” she drones.
To be honest, you hope to confide in LenLen as well. It’s about time you open to the people who you do trust very much. For the time being though, it’s been a few days since you last saw Jeongguk and he has been messaging you nonstop since then. You felt so bruised down there, especially when you both had intercourse the next morning before you left to go to work. Both were naked and finished brushing teeth, and you wrapped your arms around him from behind. Your breasts smooshed to his back. He couldn’t resist you after that. He lifted you up to where your legs linked around his body. The sex started rough once you reached his bed sheets but ended gently driving your mind wild. His touch is like lightning and he nearly cummed back-to-back when he saw a wet spot under you from where you released post orgasm.
You do plan to see him again, and despite the endless thoughts of him, you figure a nice walk around downtown is a good plan. Downtown is super close to the city but has a smaller string of stores. It’s a different scenery, something to keep your mind from cluttering. It’s been a few months. You don’t go as often because that’s where Hoseok would take you on special dates. You figure with his popularity rising from his newly released book, he may not be downtown as often, so you feel it’s safe to tread.
Goodness though, the way Jeongguk’s touch has encapsulated you into another dimension, you can’t stop thinking about him. Or his lips. Or his smile. Or his laugh. Or his tattoos, how beautifully they decorate his skin. The way he holds you… He’s a dream you hope to always have. Hands cuddled into your jacket pockets, the sun shining brightly in the sky, twenty minutes into entering downtown where cars slowly drive by and the ‘open’ signs flash on every window, you decide to enter one of the familiar shops you happened to pass. Life gets even stranger because when you enter what looks to be a beauty boutique, from the colors and setting you recognize it as one you and Hoseok used to frequent way back when.
“She had me come double check inventory. Just make sure we get more of the eye shadow palettes in. At least, that’s what she requested me to say.” Eyebrows scrunching, you have heard this voice before. It’s oddly quiet other than a radio playing, and your eyes trail to an employee nodding and scribbling down whatever was said. Your heart nearly stops when you see none other than Jimin talking to the employee after shifting through what looks to be a pile of mail. You debate running out of the store, but you never got Jimin’s number, and so you make it clear you really didn’t use him even though you kinda did accidentally on purpose, you make the haste decision to let him notice you. He hasn’t done anything wrong.
He spins around after checking over a few things and looks up at you when you clear your throat. The moment his eyes register who he is seeing, his face lights up. “Oh my gosh! Hey there!” Jimin out stretches his arms, pulling you into such a sweet embrace when he reaches you, and you can’t help but let the relief loosen your tense frame. You melt into him.
“Hey,” you whisper.
“How are you?” He pulls away slightly to read your eyes.
“I’m good… I’m sorry I never thought to get your number.”
“No! No, don’t apologize. I should be sorry. I don’t want you to think I’m that kinda guy.”
“Oh God, no.” You chuckle. “You are just fine.”
Jimin presses his lips together in concentration, his thumb rubbing your shoulder. “My sister had me check up on her store which is why I’m here.” He motions to his surroundings. “With the stress of inventory, I could use a drink. Wanna join?”
“You don’t have to ask me twice.” You say.
 -
When the strong liquid welcomes your tongue soothing your limbs once you swallow, Jimin eyes you as you twirl the liquid in the glass. The restaurant is nice and dimly lit and you are very thankful that you ran into him when you did. It makes you feel better about what happened between you two.
“I didn’t know you had a sister.” You say after a minute. Not that you ever cared to ask. “I didn’t know she owned a store.”
Jimin smiles, shrugging his shoulders. “Yeah, she’s a pain in my ass but I love her.”
“I relate on so many levels.” You chuckle, knowing Monnie would give you a look that could kill with an arched eyebrow in tow.
“Is… everything okay between us?” Jimin is curiously watching you, his expression still concerned about everything. At this point, you both have swapped numbers, promising to keep in touch. With how much your heart pines for Jeongguk, you know you won’t give in to anyone else.
“Of course, it is.” You promise. “I really mean it when I say I enjoyed your company. I just have a lot going on.”
“I understand.” He says meaningfully. “Want to talk about it?”
Considering your answer, you swallow briefly. “My ex… of three years cheated on me. Moved here a year ago.” You continue explaining how you ended up with your sister and how you were heartbroken about being stood up at the bar and how you ran into your ex and his best friend at the bar as well. All in one night. Adding that you are glad Jimin was equally attracted to you and how the distraction really helped overall.  
“Holy shit, you slept with his best friend!? You are bad ass!”
“Oh God, I’m far from it.”
“Dude, no, that’s the best way to get back at a cheater. I’m telling you. Oh, and um,” Jimin leans closer to you with a confident look, his thick lips poised in a mischievous grin, “I don’t mind you using me for whatever you want. I’m honored I got to be your first after a year of abstinence.”
You giggle, smacking his shoulder playfully. “To be honest, I’m glad it was you too. You are so sweet. I mean it. If anything, I hope we can be friends.” You reach to squeeze his hand, him running his thumb across your knuckles.
“Agreed.”
“How long ago did you and your sister move here?” You wonder aloud. “I remember you said you had been here for a long while.”
“About two years, but I am roommates with Taehyung for now. He’s pretty head over heels for his girlfriend so I’ll probably be living on my own soon.”
“That’s not bad at all,” you encourage.
“Oh yeah, I’m sure I’ll love the space, but it gets lonely sometimes… My sister lives with her current boyfriend. I’m not the biggest fan, but he’s a successful novelist. Came out with a book literally like last week.”
Your eyebrows scrunch. What? “He’s… an author?”
“Yeah… I mean he’s a good writer don’t get me wrong, but her last boyfriend… She was with him forever and she did him so dirty. I felt bad for the kid.”
“Wait a minute…” Your head is spinning. This can’t be real. Calm down, y/n, it’s all just a coincidence. You are freaking out over nothing. “Wh-who was her ex-boyfriend if you don’t mind me asking?”
He opens his mouth to reply, but his phone, that has been laying right side up on the table starts to vibrate, a picture of a smiling woman shows. “Oh, that’s my sister.” He says, “Probably calling to make sure I took care of inventory. I should take this.”
“I- I have to go anyway,” you pretend to check your wrist when really stars are showing in your eyes, because that picture. Your mouth goes immediately dry. The shirt. The way her breasts are rounded beneath that shirt. Hoseok’s shirt. The shirt that went missing. The girl in the picture… she was wearing it. She was fucking wearing it.
“Hey, Min-a.” Jimin greets into the phone, waving goodbye to you, mouthing that he will text you as you dart away. Bile rises to your esophagus burning in its wake as you rush outside to the nearest trash can. Holy shit. You can’t breathe and you gasp between heaves. Everything is crashing down as you make the connection. It’s all coming together.
You never saw her face, but you saw her torso decorated with nice breasts and Hoseok’s shirt. Jeongguk mentioned that he was cheated on too and that she was with her new boyfriend who was going over a script with an actor… His stepbrother who is none other than Kim Seokjin. Hoseok has been writing for an actor who happens to be Kim Seokjin. Jimin personally knows Kim Seokjin. Hoseok is now out with a novel. She, Jimin’s sister, owns a store downtown, a store that happens to be one that you and Hoseok used to frequent because you loved their products, but when you left him, you never went back to that specific store. Meaning… he met her there. While you two were still together. But most of all, you remember how tense Jeongguk got at the mention of Jimin… Because Jeongguk knows Jimin. And then there was the confrontation Jeongguk almost had with the guy his ex-girlfriend cheated on him with who you can’t seem to comprehend it to be:
Hoseok.
This can’t be real. No, no this can’t be fucking real. You plead to the universe, wiping your lips with your sleeve as you try to keep the next bout of nausea suppressed.
Jeongguk dated Jimin’s sister who is now with Hoseok. The girl who he cheated on you with. You heard Jimin say her name. You can hardly collect your thoughts to think her name.
Min-a.
When the nausea starts to dull just for you to regain your composure. You run. You run home and you don’t stop until you burst through the door. Monnie and Yoongi are frantic when they see you, collapsing to the floor to catch your breath while tears stream down your face, sobbing as the pain shoots through your heart. Now, you have your answer. Nobody had to tell you. You accidentally stumbled upon it yourself. At this point, seeing the devastation pouring down your face, Monnie doesn’t give you a choice, she demands the truth. As Kenai rushes to sway his furry body against your legs to calm you, you confess and tell your sister and her boyfriend everything. From beginning to end- everything.
Finally, you let every emotion out, every secret released.
-
“So, you are saying that not only did you sleep with your ex’s best friend, Namjoon. You also hooked up with your ex’s new girl’s brother and her ex-boyfriend, too!?” Monnie connecting the dots while Yoongi’s mouth drops open in alarm. “Holy cannoli, if this isn’t the best revenge story ever!”
“I wasn’t looking for revenge!” You spew.
“Not with Jimin and Jeongguk you weren’t, but you have to admit, Namjoon was definitely revenge.”
“Well Namjoon, yes.” You agree with swollen eyes. “But the rest? I had absolutely no idea they were connected.” Your palm is plastered to your forehead, and though Jeongguk has messaged you and called twice, you’ve ignored everything. You don’t know how to approach the subject. Is his ex, Min-a, who is Hoseok’s girlfriend that he left you for, is she the reason Jeongguk kept walking away from you? Why he struggled at first giving into you? Have her and Hoseok been having problems? “No wonder why Hoseok was so… shocked.” You murmur. “I thought it was because I was kissing another guy in general, but it was his girlfriend’s brother.”
“Wowza.” Yoongi shakes his head in disbelief. “I can’t comprehend it. What a small world.”
“Now it all makes sense. They all know each other.” You speak. “That’s why they’re all connected. Holy shit.”
“I definitely know Kim Seokjin. Not personally, but we’ve seen a few of his movies.” Yoongi says crossing his arms, gesturing his elbow in Monnie’s direction.
“Oh yeah, how can we not know Kim Seok-” Monnie notices Yoongi eyeballing her playfully with a quirked eyebrow and she clears her throat. “I agree. They all know each other. Jimin and Taehyung are best friends who know Kim Seokjin because he is best friends with Taehyung. Kim Seokjin also knows Jeongguk because they happen to be stepbrothers and Kim Seokjin knows Hoseok because of the movie script and novel Hoseok wrote. Also,” Monnie takes in a deep, dramatic breath. “Hoseok knows Jeongguk because Hoseok stole his girlfriend at the time, and Jeongguk knows Jimin because he dated Jimin’s sister. Am I forgetting anyone?”
“My head hurts.” You groan.
“Ah, Namjoon! He is best friends with Hoseok and since he was in the same vicinity as everyone I have mentioned, he must know everyone. I’m sure he is familiar with Jeongguk because Hoseok probably told him.”
“You’re good at this.” You blurt. “Maybe you should be a writer.”
“I’ve dabbled a time or two.” She grins, holding a finger in the air. “And that concludes your shit show of a love life.”
“Thanks.” You roll your eyes. Yet, you couldn’t concur more.
When conversation finishes with your sister and her boyfriend, you feed Kenai and give him squishy hugs and kisses while he pelts his tail at you in annoyance. You don’t care how much he prefers his food over you sometimes, you want to give him kissies and he shall accept them. There is somewhere you want to be. Need to be. You just hope he will be there.
Ordering a driver after freshening up and putting on a light amount of makeup, you throw on some tennis shoes and make your way outside. Previously you were always uncertain of the destination you were going to go. But this time, you know exactly where you are going. He will always be who you run to. Jeongguk. You haven’t stopped thinking about him since the day you met him. It has all gone by so fast, yet there is plenty of time to become more than just a thought every other second. But, neither of you can proceed until the truth is told.
The drive feels tantalizingly slow as your leg bounces profusely in the backseat until you arrive at the bookstore. You swish some mouth wash from the mini bottle in your purse as you rush to the elevator after tipping the driver, spitting it into a bush before elbowing the elevator button. Your temples beat to your increasing heart rate. Swallowing the lump forming in your throat, you recount everything. It’s time to lay it all out. No matter how risky.
Customers standing by on the third floor watch you zip past, and you try to follow your memory to Jeongguk’s door and when your feet stop before it, you inhale and exhale deeply to calm your nerves. You knock, letting your hope rise because you cannot wait to see him despite the words that haven’t been said. You hear running footsteps- and when the door opens, your breath hitches at his indescribable beauty. You see the way relief falls with his shoulders as he springs forward to hug you- pulling you into his home while the door automatically shuts behind you.
You take the time to hold him, bundling your nose into his warm chest while his hand moves to soothe into your hair. “Hey,” he whispers, placing a kiss to the top of your head. “Where have you been? I’ve been super worried.”
“I know,” you murmur, squeezing him tighter. “I know. I’m sorry… Something happened.” You hear the rustle of paws running around the living room and you can’t help but smile at the reminder of the cats. Instantly your smile falls, however, because you know a serious conversation is going to take place. Shifting to step back, so you can see the entirety of his face, he tries to read your expression. He can tell something is wrong.
“I know how you know Jimin.” You can’t help it when tears brim, especially when you see Jeongguk’s body tense. As if he is trying to protect himself from unwanted memories. From heartbreak. He remains silent. “Min-a.” Your voice is hoarse when you say her name. Jeongguk’s hands move to slide into his hair while he sucks in his lips, squeezing his eyes shut the second he registers who you just named. There’s pain in his demeanor. Pain, you know all too well. “She’s who my ex-boyfriend left me for… Hoseok.”
Disbelief, the common reaction, is all over his expression while his lips part as if to speak, but he doesn’t. “Hoseok’s not an actor…” You murmur. “He’s a writer… He knows your stepbrother because he wrote a story he wants filmed with Seokjin as the lead.” You wet your lips. “I met Jimin the day I met you. And yes… I hooked up with him the night the bar opened, but I was so emotionally distraught, I needed something. Anything to distract me because I saw Hoseok there. And his best friend. And… I was devastated that you didn’t show up.” Your fingers touch to your lips as you try to keep your composure. “I had no idea who she was until today.” You admit. “Absolutely no idea.”
“I-” Jeongguk struggles to find the words, but he steps closer to you. “I think it will take time for the shock to settle, but…” He swallows. “I never meant to hurt you that night I didn’t show up.” You feel your tears panging hot trails onto your cheeks, Jeongguk moving to cup your face to swipe the tears away with his thumbs. “I was still battling with whether I should start over with Min-a. She kept trying to reach out to see me again, and I fell for it a few times, but the second I met you.” His forehead touches to yours while you take in his warmth. “The second I met you, there was no one else I could think about. Not even her. In a fucked-up sense, I wanted closure, too. I thought…” He pauses, pulling away slightly to look into your eyes. “I thought if I gave her a chance to explain, maybe that would be enough for me to move on, but… she never showed up each time she reached out. I knew I made a huge mistake what I did to you and when you were all I continued to think about I knew… I knew it was you I ultimately wanted to be with. I’m so sorry I broke your trust. I’m so sorry I hurt you.”
“No-!” You croak. “No, it’s okay. It’s really okay.” You plea through the tears. His eyes well with them too while you both try to get through this pain. Together. “You were hurting, too. We were hurt by the same people. It’s all so unbelievable, I can hardly understand it.”
“Well, if I haven’t learned anything at all, it’s that karma’s a bitch.” Jeongguk forces a chuckle, brushing a slow, warm kiss to your lips. “I won’t let him hurt you anymore.” You feel the tenderness in his caress. His promise. This time clothes make a trail on the floor to his bedroom where your bodies cling together while love is made through the night. In the end, you hope he is the man that will mend your heart the way you hope to mend his.
No more goodbyes, Cigs.
No more goodbyes.
And that will be your promise.
-
Seven months later…
“Breathe, y/n.” Jeon Jeongguk reminds you as you take in a prolonged, shaky breath. The buzzing of the needle starts to reach your skin while his gloved hands gently touch your limb. “I promise you it’s not that bad. Do you see my arm?”
“I know, Babe. But I have never done this before. Cut me some slack here.” You whine. Closing your eyes, a prick of pain starts to tingle against your skin from the sharp darts of pinches leaving traces of black ink in its wake.
“Good.” Jeongguk encourages. “See, I told you. It’s not that bad-”
He notices you wince when he gets to a different area of your wrist where he is permanently inking your ‘delicate skin’ as you have been referring. You knew you always wanted a tattoo, but it took your forever to figure out what to get. When the idea came to get an ink print of one of Kenai’s paws, you jumped to it. Jeongguk, of course, pretending to be jealous, made it clear that he better be the one who tattoos you. The shop is closed for the day, but Jeongguk being one of the main artists, he’s allowed to do tattoos on his own time, so it is just the two of you in the facility.
You are astonished at how quickly it goes by. The needle stings, but the pain is durable. It definitely is not as bad as you anticipated. It only takes Jeongguk 45 minutes to complete Kenai’s pawprint on the underside of your wrist. “Alright, take a look and tell me what you think and then I’ll apply the wrap.” He sets the needle onto the metal table next to the chair you have been sitting in, and he takes off his gloves.
The skin is red, with small dots of blood as you expected from where the needle etched the ink, but you are blown away by how brilliantly Jeongguk did with your first ever tattoo. “It’s… It’s perfect.” Your voice breaks from the tears brimming. “I love it.” You smile wide.
He chuckles, elated by your response. “I love you.” Preparing the sticky wrap, he carefully places it, afterwards pressing a kiss to your lips. “You did it.” His smile lights up your entire world as he proudly kisses you again.
“Only because of you. I wouldn’t have survived with anybody else.”
“Yes, you would have. It’s not that bad. I told you!” Jeongguk teases, waving his tatted arm in your line of vision while he points at it with his free hand.
“Fine,” you drone. “I would prefer that it be you because it’s more special. Kenai is the love of my life aside from you.” Jeongguk quirks an eyebrow. “What? He loves you, too!”
“Are you sure about that because he’s really gotten Flounder wrapped around his toe bean.”
“He’s got you, too.” You wink.
You moved in with Jeongguk a few weeks ago, adapting to the new life. So far, it’s gone rather well. He may not throw his clothes in the laundry basket, but at least he knows how to make up for it later. Wink wink. You inwardly giggle. Though LenLen was sad to see you leave, not only did Jeongguk get you a job at the bookstore, but you are the store manager which is nice because on breaks, you can just chill at home.
Home being with Jeongguk, Kenai, Flounder and Tetra. The crazy cat couple. Nothing gets better than that.
Jeongguk on the other hand has returned to tattooing. Something he is so talented at that its mind blowing. You are so grateful for how strong of a bond you two have formed since the first day you met. As far as Hoseok, him and Min-a have broken up by the whispers on the street, but you have found a way to forgive him. Especially when he reached out to apologize for how he wronged you and how none of it was your fault. How he should have known Min-a never truly wanted him, and that you are the sole reason his novel became a hit. The day he met you at the park. How you inspired it. You aren’t sure if he knows about Namjoon still, but you are glad he didn’t mention it if he does. You figure he’d tear the book to shreds at that point, but you thanked him for his apology and that you are happy with someone else. Very happy.
Jimin is a friend of you and Jeongguk to this day, but he does not speak about his sister in either presence considering her name is still an open wound. You and Jeongguk are still working on the forgiveness for her, too.
“It’s so amazing.” You awe about your tattoo once more. Jeongguk reaches to hold your other hand. “You’re so talented.”
He shrugs. “It’s a passion… Thank you for trusting me.”
Your lips pull into a gentle smile. “Always and forever.”
Leaning forward, you kiss him again and again and again and again. You love that you can trust that there will not be a goodbye from this glorious human being before you. He will always be your hello the second you wake up, the second you come home and every moment in between. “I love you,” he whispers breathless between kisses and if there weren’t cameras installed for security, you two would be making love right here in this seat.
“I love you too, Cigs.” You whisper against his mouth. “I love you so much.”
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clubdionysus · 6 months ago
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[BAD DECISION #23] Cherry Picking
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warnings: ohhhhh we have arrived!! okay! a lil (not so) dry hump, bird manipulation!!, panty sniffing!! panties in mouth??, titty sucking, fingering, oral (f receiving), jungkooks nose <3, kissing !!! oh god the loveliest of kisses!!! unprotected sex, 'baby', cum on tits, jk cleans her up with his tongue! a gentleman! over stimulation, squirting, (just friendly tho!!)
soundtrack: diamonds - luke hemmings, finally // beautiful stranger - halsey, ruin the friendship - demi lovato
a/n: just two updates tonight as it cuts off at the perfect place!
wc: 15k
bd total wc: 540k (ongoing)
AO3 | MASTERLIST | MINORS DNI
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"They'll be wondering where you are," you say quietly, as the door behind you clicks shut. There's a slight rustle - the synthetic material of your padded jacket rubbing against itself - when Jeongguk comes to stand behind you, before he drapes it over your shoulders.
"Shouldn't start the New Year with a cold," he simply states stepping over the stone bench to sit down beside you. It's cold beneath his body, but he's got his coat on too. You've a hand warmer in each pocket, so pass one over to him. "Thanks."
"I mean it, Gguk," you double down, voice soft. "It's nearly time."
He just shrugs. Looks up to the sky.
You're in the tiny courtyard that's attached to the staffroom; Jeongguk's secret hiding spot for when he needs to escape from the chaos of Dionysus. There are some sheets of plywood in the corner that Jeongguk needs to take over to Yoongi's studio, but he's still putting off the expansions his boss wants doing. Doesn't want to lose his little sanctuary just yet.
It feels like he's losing more and more comforts day by day.
His final university deadlines are approaching, and he's gonna have to decide if he stays comfortable or does something far more terrifying a lot sooner than he's really ready for.
Change can be daunting, so he's choosing to keep things as they are as much as he can. Feels safer that way. The curse of Jeon Jeongguk is his ability to let his fears control his life. He's always been this way. Fears he always will be. The irony isn't lost on him.
"They'll be wondering where you are, too," he says. Thinks that Danbi must be running around like a headless chicken trying to find you - but also knows she was holding Tae's hand as she was glancing around before he left, so maybe she'll be a bit distracted. Thinks it's about time. Tae's been looking at her like a lovesick pup for weeks, now. Months, even.
"Jiyeong-" You begin, but are cut off by Jeongguk.
He doesn't want to talk about her. Doesn't wanna have to explain what happened, because it feels embarrassing and bothersome. Pity looks so pretty on your features, but he doesn't want to be the recipient of such a gentle look.
"-Isn't gonna be a part of next year," he says. Though his tone isn't stern, it is incredibly final .
You bring your gaze down from the skies, and rest your chin on your shoulder to look at Jeongguk. His eyes are still searching for stars - the light pollution proves to make it impossible - chin tilted upward, dewy nose to the sky. His skin is beginning to blush from the cold. His lips are thin; folded in on themselves, lip ring shining ever so daintily as it flips in the corner of his mouth.
You've missed watching his piercing do the thing. When you've as much alcohol in your system as you do, you find it makes your tummy flip, too. It's silly of your body to behave like that. Drunk or not, Jeongguk is still just Jeongguk.
From the club, you can hear the echoes of a chant. The countdown has begun. If you ask questions now, he'll just brush them off.
You're a little too tipsy to really comprehend what he means, either way.
"We should go back inside," you whisper, eyes still on him, your chin denting down into the thick padding of your coat. You always think you look like an emo Michelin baby whenever you wear it. If Jeongguk heard the comparison, he'd laugh. Would agree.
When he turns to look at you, he barely notices the coat. Just thinks you look cosy. Is pleased to find the stars right here on Earth, instead.
"Won't make it in time," he says.
"Could try?"
"Why bother?"
"'Cause you should be around people who care about you when it hits twelve," you say, a little pout on your lips. He's being difficult.
And then he just shrugs. Knocks into your shoulder. Smiles. "Are we not already?"
There's silence for a moment. Just a second.
The sky above you both begins to sparkle; greens and blues erupting where darkness once was. They scatter into the night; pinks and yellows spiralling just like your mind so often does whenever Jeongguk speaks in riddles.
You're aware that the fireworks are deafening, but you're oblivious to the sound. All you can hear is the beating of your own heart. The explosions shimmer in Jeongguk's eyes, but it's still only stars you can see in them.
"Happy New Year," Jeongguk says quietly. Smiles tenderly. Fills you with a warmth that the frigid winter night had previously stolen. He doesn't look at your lips. Makes no indication that he's thinking about a New Year's kiss.
There are a dozen girls in that room who'd have jumped at the chance to lock lips with him, even if just for a moment as the bells rang out, and yet he's chosen to be with you.
He could have been with Hayun.
And yet he's chosen to be with you.
"Happy New Year," you smile right back. The exchange is soft, like mid-winter snow; warm like a breeze on a summer's day. Secure like a three-pin-padlock; secret, like the code written in the back of an old notebook.
"Hey, B?" He says quietly, eyes still on yours. The sky flashes a myriad of colours. They rain down on him; paint him better than Picasso ever could.
"Mhmm?"
He grins. You think his lip ring looks so pretty. Teeth, too. Pearly and perfectly proportioned for him.
"Stop looking at my lips," he teases. "Gonna make me think you wanna kiss me."
A gasp escapes your lips. You look away. Cover your mouth. Can't believe how fucking obvious you must have been.
"I was just..." you begin to excuse yourself, but then laugh. Choose honesty. "I was actually just thinking about the fact you missed out on a New Years Kiss."
Jeongguk shrugs in that boyish way he so often does, as if he has no care for the arbitrary realities of life. C'est la vie . He looks up to the skies, and lets his smile linger as the illuminations paint the midnight skies.
"Got all year for kisses, B. Only one chance to see the New Year in with my best friend."
And maybe it's because you've been rattled by Hayun, or maybe it's because he's one of the only good things to have come out of the past year, but hearing him claim you as his best friend makes you feel like a weight has been lifted.
"Best friend?" You question, just to make sure.
He nods. "Best friend."
It's laughable, really, how those two words take aim at the arrows shot by Hayun, and knocks them off course before they can really implode on your heart. Just a surface scratch, now. That's all.
"What about Jimin?"
Jeongguk tilts his head to the side. Considers it. "Family."
You're pleased to hear the conclusion of his consideration. You've a shared history with Jimin that could make things awkward between the three of you, and yet you all chalk it up to dumb drunk choices. Aren't the first you've ever made. Won't be the last.
"Be weird if I said you were like family, too," Jeongguk adds - then feels the need to clarify, even though he totally doesn't. "Fucked you. Would make for weird family gatherings."
You laugh. Nod. "Yeah. Probably best you don't ever tell girls I'm like a sister or anything like that," you muse.
He laughs, too, but doesn't say anything. Thinks of Hayun, and how he knows you had definitely had a spat with her before you left. Wants to know what was said. Knows it will be about him. Doesn't want to sour your mood. Is quite conflicted.
Luckily for him, your mind works in a similar way, and your filter is next to non-existent when you've had as many drinks as you have.
"I thought Hayun was your best friend."
Jeongguk looks over to you, his eyes a little hard, brows pinching above his nose. You don't look at him. The fireworks are dwindling, now.
"Friendships change," he admits candidly.
Won't tell you how the second he heard someone asking for star fuckers, he assumed it was you .
Won't tell you how he recited lines - already said to you - to her, because he wasn't comfortable enough in her presence to let his brain think of anything original. Went for something safe. Went for something nurtured with you.
Won't tell you how much the way you've subtly distracted him - with glitter and nonsensical conversations - throughout the night has helped him get his head straight.
Won't tell you how watching you leave felt like a sucker punch to the chest.
Won't tell you that he didn't even consider going over to his friends, because in that moment he was furious with the fact Hayun had made you want to leave so close to midnight. He likes to think it wasn't intentional, but celebrating with her while you would have been alone? Didn't seem like something worth celebrating at all.
If he hadn't been distracted (as always) by your disco ball eyes, and the way light shines from your very being, he never would have known you were speaking with her. Never would have seen her do that thing with her eyes - the cold, vacant, roll of them he used to know so well - that he hated so much. Never would have realised you were leaving.
You'd have spent New Year's by yourself, away from the people who love you, cold and quiet.
And it would have been her fault.
Mentally, he excuses her bad behaviour; tells himself it's probably a mix of alcohol and someone new taking her place that made her hostile.
But when he looks at you, and acknowledges the sadness that imposes on your features, the guilt creeps in. He blames himself . If he'd have introduced you two, maybe it would have gone differently. If Jiyeong hadn't been so rude to her, maybe Hayun wouldn't have been so malevolent with you.
Absolving Hayun of blame is something Jeongguk's been doing for years. Patterns of behaviour are easy to acknowledge; difficult to end.
He's trying. He's here. That counts for something.
You think Jeongguk is right. Friendships do change. You're scared that Hayun's presence will change yours.
"When do you clock off?" You ask, instead of venturing any further down the road of a topic you don't think will benefit either of you.
Jeongguk raises his wrist - the one without his watch on it - and hums. Pretends to read it. Makes you giggle.
"About five minutes ago."
The skies have settled once more. The only stars he can see are ones in his peripherals; the specks of glitter on his skin, and the girl beside him.
The chill of a winter freeze is sobering you up. You know that you probably can't walk straight, but you can think straight, and that's absolutely outrageous, as far as you're concerned. The night is still young and - as Jimin said - so are you. The heaviness in your heart is ageing you. You don't care for it.
"Starfuckers?" you propose - and the way Jeongguk smiles has you wishing you'd asked earlier.
"Thought you'd never ask," he grins, but catches himself.
Decides he needs to give you a little context on Jiyeong before continuing the night, 'cause he doesn't wanna talk about it when he's a few shots too deep to be sensible about things.
"Jiyeong gets really... argumentative when she drinks."
His slow speech makes it evident how careful he's trying to be. You know what it really means. Knows she must have said something awful for him to be mentioning it now.
"Was it bad?" you ask, a little clueless, and hating it.
Jeongguk nods. Bites the bullet. Doesn't look at you as he says, "She threw a drink on me."
"She what?!"
Jeongguk smirks, not because he finds it funny, but because he finds it awkward. Rolls his eyes, and shakes his head. "Was at the bar. Fucking mortifying ."
You study his face, looking for signs you might have missed.
"Where did she get you?" You ask, but realise as soon as your question finishes. You gasp again. Can't believe you hadn't thought to ask earlier. "The outfit change?!"
He confirms your suspicions. "Anyways, I'm sort of... done with her."
His hesitation is genuine, not because he's unsure of his choice, just because he's still worried about letting you down.
To his surprise, you're the one apologising.
The weight in your chest when he admits that he doesn't want to be with her is catastrophic. You thought you had picked well for him. You really thought maybe you'd helped him. You feel like the failure.
"Gguk, if I'd have known she was like that, I never would have set things up. I'm so so sorry. You didn't deserve that whatsoever."
"Not your fault," he says, offering you a sincere smile. "Just the way the cookie crumbles sometimes."
He's downplaying it, and you both know it. He doesn't want to talk about it though, so you won't push. Not now. Another time, yes.
Thing is, neither of you are at fault. C'est la vie.
"You know how many stars there are?" You ask, in a bid to change the subject to something a little easier to digest.
Jeongguk shakes his head. "Not a clue, B."
"Oh," you say quietly. "Thought you might. Always mumbling stuff about the stars, you are."
He smiles to himself. Thinks it's hardly a surprise.
Deflects, and asks, "You know much about manure?"
"What?" You chirp, then laugh. What a bizarre question. "No?"
"Oh," he hums, mimicking you. "Thought you might. Always chatting shit."
You tell him to fuck off, so he gets to his feet - but holds his hand out for you.
"C'mon," he knocks his head to the side. "Let's go get fucked up."
It's quarter past twelve by the time you make it back to your friends, Jeongguk double fisting drinks 'cause he's so far behind everyone else and needs to get fucked up.
It doesn't take much - four double dark rum and cokes, three purple starfuckers - for him to be doing the robot in a strange sort of avant-garde dance battle with Hobi and Jimin. You're not really sure what you're looking at as Jeongguk moves his body in a way you never need to see him move his body - but you find it hilarious. He's both smooth and awkward in his movements. None of it quite makes sense.
You smile through it all. Endlessly. Affectionately. Adoringly.
And then you're laughing, too.
Might just be the vodka. Might be the nerves of Hayun's eyes being on you. Most likely, it's because Jeongguk looks ridiculous. So sexy in one moment, and so goofy in the next.
You never know what's coming next. He almost stumbles over to you as you nurse on a drink by the sofas. Regains his balance. Tries to play it cool. Is suave as he says, "you good down there, B?" - but then he sinks down into the sofa beside you, a silly grin on his rum-drunk lips. You find that you'd welcome all his surprises, good or bad.
He hiccups. Scolds himself. Asks you how you are. Hiccups again. Listens as you tell him to hold his breath. Hiccups as he's doing it. Gives up. Hiccups freely.
He's still got a drink in his hand, so you take it from him and have a sip or two. He doesn't protest. Rabbits on about something neither of you will remember in the morning. The club lights hit him in all the right places, making his glittered cheekbones appear even more majestic than they already were.
"More glitter," you muse. "You need more glitter."
"Y'know," he slurs, looking all very poised and serious, a finger pointing as he speaks. "I was thinking the exact same thing."
He chats absolute shit while you dapple his cheeks with more pretty sparkles. They match his eyes, now.
You've managed to avoid Hayun since returning, and you're secretly pleased that Jeongguk has done the same.
Aside from a few awkward glances when you both arrived back to greet your friends, he's deliberately steered clear. Wants an orderly mind before they speak again.
He's still disgruntled by the fact you found her so intolerable you were willing to spend New Year alone just to not be near her. Trusts you. Trusts your judgement (even if you did set him up with Jiyeong). Trusts you always see the good in people, but knows you struggled to see the good in her.
Thinks maybe life would have been easier if he met you first.
Hayun over by the bar with Nabi and Tae. They seem to be her closest friends amongst the circle. Yoongi didn't say a single word to her all night, but Seoyeon was pretty friendly with her.
They left just after midnight, and were gone by the time you and Jeongguk returned from the courtyard. Namjoon's working the early shift tomorrow - "the news isn't gonna write itself" - so he'd dipped with them, too.
Like Yoongi, Jimin gives Hayun the cold shoulder. It's expected, given how close he is to Jeongguk.
You're unaware of the fact that she and Jimin go way back. Knew each other as kids. If anyone should have still been pally with her, it would be him - but he's the only one who knows how much Jeongguk suffered because of her. He knows the situation almost as well as he knows the plotline for The Notebook, and considering that it's his go-to hangover movie (while also considering how often he's hungover), it's safe to say he's got a decent understanding of it.
Jimin will never be on Hayun's side. He told her years ago that this would be the consequence of her dicking Jeongguk around, and is a man of his word when it comes to his friends. Used to really eat him up, how easily she let go of their friendship. Counts it as a blessing, now.
As he stands by the bar and notices what's going on with you, Jeongguk and a tube of liquid glitter, he smiles. Doesn't have a clue what happened with Jiyeong. Doesn't care. Really couldn't give a shit for any other girl in Jeongguk's life. Is just glad he has you.
You've been good for him.
"What's going on with them?" Hayun asks as she joins him at the bar. Is a little annoyed Jeongguk has been so... avoidant. It's a change to the norm. Jeongguk doesn't do change. Something feels... off.
Jimin's smile fades. She still tries to be his friend. It annoys him. "Nothing."
She laughs. It's insincere.
"I've got a pair of eyes, Jimin. He's sat there like a lovesick puppy while some girl covers him in fucking glitter," she sneers.
"So? Your point?"
"It's fucking weird."
Jimin rolls his eyes. Exhales a deep sigh. "You've not been here, Hayun. You can't come back and decide that everything is awful just because it isn't the way you left it. Life's moved on. You should try it, sometime."
"That's not it," she says.
"So what is it?" Jimin questions. He doesn't really want to be having this conversation, but everyone's fucked. He thinks he'd rather know if she's up to no good. Might not remember it in the morning, but at least he'll know now.
"He's changed."
"He's happy," Jimin says bluntly. "That's what's changed."
"She's not his girlfriend," Hayun states.
Jimin knows about Jeongguk's desire to call things off with Jiyeong. Doesn't know about the fact he kind of already has. Also doesn't think it's his place to air Jeongguk's dirty laundry, so he says the safest thing he can.
"Nor is Jiyeong, if that's what you're getting at. Not sure if you remember, but Gguk has a hard time saying no to girls who treat him like shit," he says with a little venom. "His relationships are frankly none of your business. You revoked rights to that sort of information years ago."
"I'm just concerned," she says - and she sounds like she actually means it. Jimin doesn't buy it for a second, but lets her talk. "I used to know him better than anyone. It's like looking at a stranger, now."
"And who's fault is that?" Jimin snaps, but either Hayun is too drunk to really notice or too narcissistic to actually care.
Instead of actually responding, Hayun muses aloud. "All of it...the glitter, the puppy dog eyes... her attitude problem... It all just screams quarter-life crisis."
She's unaware that your glitter session ended a few minutes ago. Is unaware that you've dashed to the staff room to put your phone on charge. Is unaware that you'd sent Jeongguk on the hunt for more drinks.
Doesn't realise until Yeonjun flashes a grin, and says, "fuckin' hell. Shoulda put a bet on you morphing into Disco Ball."
Jeongguk smirks, resting his palms on the bar. He is, admittedly, DB2.0 at this point. There's glitter in his hair . "Starfuckers?"
"Trust me to make them?" Yeonjun checks - not that Jeongguk is stepping a foot behind the bar, not when he's as trashed as he is. The palms resting on the bar aren't just because he knows he looks good - it's because he needs to steady himself.
He nods. Taps Jimin on shoulder. "Starfucker?"
"Stupid question."
"I think the word you were looking for is 'yes'," Jeongguk grins, turning his attention back to Yeonjun. "Three, please, mate."
Hayun doesn't hide the smile on her face. Some things, apparently, don't change. She likes Jeongguk when you aren't around.
"Hey, buddy," she smiles in that way she always did when she'd been up to no good and wanted him on her side again.
Jeongguk is silent. Isn't smiling. Doesn't look at her. Just simply says: "Careful, Hayun."
"Hmm?" she questions, wondering what on earth she needs to watch out for. The bar's nearly empty, now.
"Watch your mouth when you're chatting shit," he says dryly, his voice just as flat as his eyes are vacant. "You never know who's listening."
Yeonjun can't help but smirk. Has been watching Jeongguk's entire life blow up right in front of his very eyes all night, and it just never ceases to surprise him. Has no idea who this bitch is in front of him, but the way Jeongguk looks like he wants to chew her up and spit her out? Oh, he is living for it.
He pours the shots. Decides the bar needs a good wipe-down. Stays close just to listen in.
Is surprised when he hears Jeongguk mention you by name. Had almost forgotten you actually have one. Is so used to calling you Disco Ball.
Admittedly, he thinks there's a tenderness to the way Jeongguk says your name. Thinks it's really fuckin' sweet.
He says your name, knocks back his shot, then says, "I dunno what you said to her earlier, but you were outta line. She's our friend." He passes the next shot over to Jimin. Finally looks down at Hayun. Is surprised when it doesn't hurt like he half thinks it should. He's never spoken to her like this before. "So play nicely, and keep her name out your mouth unless you're telling her how pretty her glitter looks."
Hayun thinks Jeongguk's gone absolutely clinically insane.
Yeonjun thinks this is brilliant .
From the corner of his eye, Jeongguk notices the staff room door open and close, so he picks up the spare shot that Hayun mistakenly thought was hers. As you approach, glittery and gorgeous like always, he holds it out for you to take.
"Oh, you star. Thank you," you beam, accepting it without a second thought. You ignore Hayun.
"Charging?" Jeongguk asks, just to make sure the dodgy wire in the staff room is working. You nod, and assure him it's fine. "Dancefloor?"
Again, you nod. "Please."
Yeonjun thinks he's gonna watch the security cameras back later just to see all of that unfold again. He's never seen a face look so much like a slapped arse, but Hayun? Offt . She's going through it.
"Y'know, maybe he has changed," Jimin smirks. "Ain't that a blessing."
Hayun is silent. Jeongguk has never spoken to her like that. Ever. Not even when they were fighting. The life she's returned to no longer has space for her, or so it feels like.
You're too drunk to care. Decide that you're better off pretending like she doesn't exist. You derive no joy from her existence, and think that this year you should only do things that make you happy.
When Jeongguk forces you to dance with him? You're happy.
When he yawns, and starts talking about kebabs? You're happy.
When he holds your hand and drunkenly traipses down the clubbing district to the kebab place he swears down laces their fries with crack? You're happy.
Happy when Jeongguk insists you walk instead of catching a cab, happy when he offers you a piggyback, happy when he doesn't put you down, not even in the elevator of his apartment complex.
Doesn't put you down until you're both sat on the floor between his kitchen area and sitting room. The lights are off, but early morning is breaking; the city intruding on your privacy.
Your hair is so long now, he thinks. How long has he known you? He can't remember. But it was short when you first met. Just above your shoulders. Now, it finishes midway down your chest. You're not the same person as you were back then, and nor is he.
It's a realisation; he's still learning about you. If somebody had asked him even a day ago how quickly your hair grows, he wouldn't have had an answer. Had never noticed. Knows your roots need doing, but he likes them so never comments on them.
Jeongguk knows you so well, and yet not at all.
He knows your favourite drink in a dive bar, but doesn't know what you'd get at bottomless brunch with the girls. Knows that you demolish Psy's It's Art in a noraebang, but has no idea what your favourite song is. Knows so much and yet knows nothing at all.
Knows your fears; doesn't know your hopes.
The realisation upsets him.
And so he asks. Lets you drunkenly natter on about your childhood dreams; plays the band you said soundtracked your childhood from his phone. It's set on the floor a little bit away from you. He chooses not to play it through a proper speaker. There's an intimacy to this. Thinks it's important you keep this shit analogue.
There's a dozen birds above Jeongguk's bed that outline the a-z of your intimacy textbook, but none of them include this.
None of them mentions talking about your childhood pet, and watching Jeongguk's pretty little smile appear on his scrunched-up face as he enthuses over puppy pictures.
Not a single bird includes candid admittance of times you threatened to run away from your family home as a teenager; nor do they include the way the Jeongguk asks about your escape plans, and tells you how you definitely could have done it.
There are no birds that tell you to bare your soul, and yet, you do.
Jeongguk is so kind with it. Accepts it graciously, and touches it with tender hands; places it down beside his own, and finds you fit perfectly in the empty space.
He finds himself nervous. Not in the lip-biting, ring-flipping, unsure eyes kind of way you're used to seeing him in, well, any uncomfortable situation; but in a different way entirely.
He worries that the night will end. Is concerned that you'll leave, and that things will be cemented in this awkwardly 'okay' stalemate.
He knows more about you than he did a few hours ago; has learned itsy bitsy tales of childhood and saw your face cringe as he scoured your mum's facebook page for pictures of your teenage haircut that you swore was cool at the time (not that his mother's kitchen scissor bowl cut was much better).
You've an idea of the layout of his family home, thanks to an overly explained prank that he says he pulled on his brother, which you also learn resulted in no eyebrows for either of them (another thing to thank his mother for ( "a punishment to match the crime" is how Jeongguk phrased it as he mindlessly stroked over his since-recovered brows)).
These aren't little things to know about one another. They're candid revelations packaged in awkward smiles and tied with liquor-laced ribbons.
Little presents, squirrelled away in each of your minds; reminders that the most intimate we can be with another person is when we're fully clothed.
Foolish of you not to consider that. C'est la vie.
That's what Jeongguk worries about. He worries that you'll leave, and the physical intimacy won't have matched the emotional intimacy and it will fuck with your head. Will have you ignoring him, or avoiding him.
You don't say anything, but as you watch him get to grips with a karaoke mic by the sofa, a song about makgeolli playing in the background, his giggles echoing into the speaker system, you don't ever want to avoid him again. Hated the time spent keeping a distance. Life is so much better when he's around.
He encourages you up, and forces you to dance with him like a pair of lunatics to an old Psy song. It's one of the ones Psy would always sing at his university campus shows, and when you mention this, Jeongguk cannot fathom the fact you've seen him live . Forces you to find it on youtube. Tries to find you in the crowd - but it's like a game of where's wally.
Eventually, he gives up. Says he's found you. Points to the mirror in the corner of the room - and when you look over and see the pair of you as you are, you decide that maybe bad decisions would be a good idea.
Glitter speckled, you're both messes. Still in your club clothes, there's something funny about the way your hair is in a lopsided bun on top of your head, his hair kind of all over the place. You'd be forgiven for thinking the pair of you had been at it - when in reality, all you'd been doing was singing your hearts out in a make-shift home noraebang.
You're busy laughing, toying with his little tufts of hair that stick out on end when his front door beeps, Jimin finally entering the code to return home. Dawn is breaking, and you're surprised that he's alone. He's busy chewing on a sotteok sotteok stick - mini sausages and rice cakes threaded onto a wooden skewer - to pay you much attention. The spicy sauce drips into the container he's holding, which you both recognise to be from the convenience store down the road.
"Here he is," Jeongguk teases, as Jimin casts his housemate a small grin.
He's pissed - still drunk as a skunk - and slurs his words as he goes to speak. "There's a disco ball in our living room."
"It's not a party worth having if you don't have a disco ball," you assure him, to which he lets you know that it's not a party if there are only two people.
"When there's two," he mumbles through a mouthful of tteok, waving the half-empty stick in the air. "That's not a party."
"So what is it?" Jeongguk asks.
The way Jimin smiles before he starts talking makes Jeongguk regret ever asking.
"A couple."
Jeongguk shoos him away. Tells him he needs a good night's sleep before he inevitably watches The Notebook tomorrow morning, like he always does whenever he wakes up alone with a hangover. A depressing way to start the year, you think.
"DB, you like Gosling?" Jimin says, in his pants and t-shirt now, sitting on the floor. He's holding a glass of water like it's a sippy cup. You cannot believe you've had sex with him. Twice. "Wanna watch?"
"Prefer Reynolds," you say of the famous Ryan's.
Jeongguk squeezes your knee. Smiles. Remembers the Deadpool marathons with you and Danbi. Likes how much you've both integrated into one another's lives.
This is just reality now.
And for the first time in a long time, Jeongguk realises just how lucky he really is. His life may not be grand, and it may not be written about in history books; but it's a fulfilled life. He's happy.
Jimin falls asleep on the living room floor. Is dragged into his room by Jeongguk. Won't remember any of it in the morning.
When Jeongguk finally retires to his room, you're poking around at the birds on his desk.
"I missed some?"
He nods. Sits on the edge of his bed, legs spread, leaning back to rest on his elbows. He's tired. Doesn't wanna sleep. Has missed you too much. "Fell a couple of weeks ago."
You pout. "I've missed the kids."
Jeongguk is soft as he says, "they missed you, too."
Looking at you now as you scan his room, party dress sparkling as the early morning sun intrudes on his room, he struggles to remember what life was like before he knew you.
And then he wonders if he'll ever forget what it felt like to fuck you.
He doesn't mean to think about you improperly - he's just in that god-awful state of post-drinking pleasure-seeking.
He's not even gonna deny it. He wants you.
There's a dilemma that comes with Jeongguk's desire: morals.
He's not sure how drunk Jiyeong was. Isn't sure how intentional she was with her threats. Doesn't know if she'll remember what she did, or if she'll even realise Jeongguk called it quits when she wakes up the next morning.
If he were to check his phone, he'd see that one of the personal trainers from the gym had tagged him in an insta story with the caption 'come get your girl, bro', and said girl necking on with some guy Jeongguk wouldn't be able to pick out from a crowd.
He doesn't check his phone, though. Regardless of everything, he was never her boyfriend. The way she treated him is exactly why he never asked. She burnt her bridges time and time again. Jeongguk doesn't care to rebuild them again, not when she never lends a hand.
It's not that he wants to be cruel. It's not that he never cared. Nothing like that at all.
But he is drunk, and he is single, and fuck it's so nice to be around someone that makes him feel as lovely as you do.
When he holds out his hands, you gravitate towards him. Stand between his legs. Look down at his pretty face, hands delicate beneath his jaw.
Jeon Jeongguk is gonna ruin your life, you think.
As his hands stoke up your bare thighs, and encourages you onto his lap without a single word?
Life, ruined. You're certain.
The way you do whatever he asks of you has you considering that maybe your life isn't even yours anymore. His. All his.
You know you shouldn't entertain this. The Jiyeong shit is too fresh. Hayun, too - but that only encourages you. You have what she wants. You'd like to keep it that way.
His grip on your waist is tight as he pulls you up his lap, the thick ridge of his bulge beneath you perfectly positioned to rut up against you.
There's hesitation to your movements; delicacy.
His are the opposite. Decisive. He knows what he wants - and as he uses his grip to push you further down onto his crotch, your soft whimpers let him know that you want it, too.
"Gguk," you whisper, heart beating so fast you're scared it might short circuit. He nudges his nose against yours. Nods. Could kiss you, if he wasn't behaving himself.
It's laughable, really, how he's humping himself up against you, and considers it 'good' because he isn't kissing you.
Your voice is barely audible when you say, "I hate my rules."
Jeongguk's jaw tenses. His eyes close, nostrils a little flared as he tries to control his breathing. Nudges his nose a little deeper against yours.
"Me too, B."
He despises them. Loathes them. Will never break them. No matter how hard is cock is and how difficult it is to think straight when he's suffocated by your hair. They're yours to break. Yours alone.
So while the admission makes him needy - gets him squeezing at your soft flesh, body grinding a little faster - he keeps his lips away. Kind of. There's a very small gap for you to close.
You could do it.
Could sink your lips down onto his, and experience what it's like to feel his moans vibrate into your mouth. Could let his tongue lick against yours. Could hold his jaw, lips hard and deliberate as they press against each other.
Could do a million little things. Your nipples are hard just from the thought of it all, and your thin lace bra hides nothing. Nor does your dress.
Jeongguk can feel them against his chest. Can't stop himself from tightly squeezing at them, his thumbs settling over your hardened bud. He rubs against them, knowing just how sensitive they are, even through your clothes, and is pleased when your breathing starts to get heavier.
A moan gets trapped in your throat, nails scratching against the nape of his neck. You're matching his movement, hips grinding against him.
You wonder how long it's been since he used someone else to relieve him. Find yourself worried it hasn't been long enough. Don't want him thinking about her while he's with you. It's not like you can control his mind, but then again, you're unaware of the catastrophic hold you have on him.
He takes a second to scan your eyes, and as much as you want to hold his gaze, you're distracted by his glitter. His cheeks, the rogue specks on his nose, his jaw... along the indent of his cupid's bow.
Jeongguk has enough experience with glitter-induced mindlessness, so knows that's what's happening - but he wants to check that you still want this. Still want him . It's been a while, and he knows the fact he'd been with someone else could hinder your desire for him.
Funny. He's not thinking about the fact you hooked up with Jimin at all. Couldn't give a shit about that.
All he can think about you, and your wants, your needs. Brushes a strand of hair away from your face, as he says, "if this is too weird, we can stop."
But you just shake your head, a soft smile on your pouty lips. He licks across his own.
"I've missed you," you admit all rather foolishly. Laugh, then cover your face with your hands. Jeongguk likes the rings you're wearing. Always the same three. Thin and dainty, they're as much a part of you as your glitter is.
His fingers wrap around your wrists, as he pulls them down. There's a little resistance from you, but eventually, you concede. Look at him a little helplessly, but are pleased to see him smiling.
"Missed you, too."
When you chirp a small hum in reply, Jeongguk laughs. Holds your waist again, stroking your sides ever so tenderly. Reassures you. "Of course I have. You know how much I like having you like this."
You narrow your eyes now, but it's playful. Feign a little offence, just to keep him smiling. "Have me like what exactly, Jeon?"
He rolls his eyes, but just pushes the hair that's covering your neck away from you. Leans a little closer, and presses a kiss into your skin. The contact of his lips, a little wet and torturously firm, has you sighing, hips pulling up. He encourages this. Grips onto your waist a little tighter. Pushes you down onto his crotch. Lets himself grind up against you once, twice, then husks against your neck, "Like this, B. Like you wanna get that pretty pussy of yours all messy for me."
He pulls back. Holds you tightly in place over his cock, of which he knows is embarrassingly hard. Sometimes he thinks all you have to do is glance in his direction to get him like this.
The way you're looking at him - eyes all wide, lips parted ever so slightly - gets his hips pulsing again ever so gently. Your body moves with his, the sensation of his hardness beneath you making you feel a way that could only be compared to Nirvana.
You're the one who pulls him closer, now, a hand cradling his jaw, the other sinking into his hair. It's a control thing. Want him close, but can also pull him away. It excites him. Always does whenever you take the reins back from him.
As your grip tightens in his hair, his breathing shallows. Nose nudging against his, you know you're a little too close. Know you're being mean. Know how much he must be dying to close the gap, 'cause you are too.
"I do," you whisper back. "It's already messy."
"Hmm?" he moans an incoherent reply. Has his lips firmly pressed shut, cause he doesn't trust himself. Has closed his eyes, too. Can't risk it.
"Mhmm," you murmur back. "So messy, Koo."
The way you soften the sound of his name has him desperate to fuck himself into you. You're so soft, and tender, and everything he's been missing.
"For me?" He asks, because formulating words is the only way he can stay focused - but even that's failing him, now.
"All for you."
His cock throbs beneath you. He knows he must be messy, too, precum pooling from the tiny slit at the very tip of his cock. Hates that he's trapped in his clothes, but loves the idea of slowly getting you out of yours.
"All mine," he smiles to himself, lost in the way he feels. You nod. Giggle. Let your hair drape around his face as your forehead leans on his. He laughs, too.
You're both highly aware of the fact that this is wrong .
You shouldn't be acting like this. Shouldn't be feeling this.
But you are.
And you'll continue to do so until the night draws to its inevitable end.
"What should I do about it, then, huh?" Jeongguk asks, tilting his pretty face up a little bit. The glitter on his cheeks catches in the light of his bedside table. The room around you feels too big. You don't acknowledge it. Only him.
You're so quiet when you reply. Know that you're saying things you shouldn't be; tempting him like you're some kind of divine serpentine being. Jeongguk's got one trailing up his arm in thick black ink. He likes snakes. Likes you, more. Likes how delicate your voice is when you say, "clean it up."
One of his hands grips your ass. Squeezes. Hard. Makes you mewl.
"And how should I do that?" He asks softly, knowing that if he doesn't get some kind of release soon, the friction of your still-clothed pussy over the bulge in his trousers will end him. Write him off entirely. Might even make him die.
You could be demure in your answer. You could play coy. Stop this from escalating
Or you could continue grinding against him, breath laboured, heartbeat unstable. You could run your thumb along his bottom lip. Nudge your nose against his in that tender you always do.
And then you could simply say, "Eat me out."
"Yeah?" He would say. Would want you to repeat it.
"Yeah," you'd reply. "Eat me out. Please."
So that's exactly what you do.
Jeongguk's mouth waters at the mere suggestion of getting his tongue between your folds. Has thought about it so many times. Never thought he'd see the day that you ask for it.
The tiny 'please' you whisper? The way you beg for it? His cock aches. Needs relief from you.
You're finicky to a fault though. Smirk as you say, "Real shame the bird hasn't fallen, isn't it?"
There are a few birds on his desk, but none of them are that specific bird.
Of all the ones you wrote together, there's only been one that you've ever known the identity of as it watches over you.
There's a small mark on its wing. You'd been holding the pen between your teeth as you'd folded it, but been distracted by Jeongguk mumbling to himself. Had narrowly avoided leaving a blotch of ink on crisp white sheets.
Instead, you'd cursed a bird - and so for the past six months, you'd look up at birds and wonder when it would fall. It was the only one you felt apprehensive of, but that simply was down to fact you knew what it was.
"Maybe we can do an I.O.U. for the birds?" He offers. Is keen.
You know you shouldn't cherry-pick the birds. It goes against their free will. Playing God will only ever end in tears - but you're still tipsy, and all you can think about is how much you need this.
It's been so long since anyone has eaten you out that now the idea is floating, you won't be able to rest until it's happened.
His hands stroke up the back of your legs as you stand up on his bed. His head is level with the tops of your thighs, so he lets his lips brush against them. Presses wet kisses up them. Is slow. You take a little extra pulling the right bird down. Lean in such a way that he's dangerously close to your panties. He can smell your arousal. Wants to taste it.
You settle back into his lap, bodies close as you hand him the bird. He looks at you. Wonders if there's magic behind those starry eyes of yours. Thinks there must be.
When he opens it up, and is greeted with the exact same act you've asked him to perform, he knows there must be magic in you.
The truth of it all is that you'd just made a bad decision when you made it. Shouldn't have dropped the pen. But you did; and now you're here.
"Make me feel good," you implore as you toy with his hair.
He wants his lips on your body; wants to feel the pressure of his lips brushing against yours.
Just isn't brave enough to take things that far, yet.
He tucks a little bit of your own hair behind your ear. Studies your face.
"Look at me when you ask."
You're slow to do as he asks. Spend a little time toying with his necklaces, instead. You know his eyes are on yours. He could count your lashes if he wanted - but he doesn't. Mainly because he can't think straight, let alone count above the number ten.
"B," he encourages, index finger curling beneath your chin. He tilts your head upwards, your eyes trailing up his features until they settle on his eyes.
"Want you to make me feel good."
He nods. Is eager as he does so. It's so hard to not kiss you.
"I will. Gonna make you feel so good, Byeol. You want that? Want me to make your pussy feel good?"
You nod your head. Widen your eyes as you beg. "Please."
Jeongguk respositions you. Gets you sitting in his spot. Stands as he grabs his shirt by the nape of his neck and pulls it over his head. Chucks it at you. Makes you both laugh - but fuck. He's gorgeous .
He grips the bulge in the front of his trousers. Groans .
"See how hard you make me?" He asks. Waits for you to nod. Unbuttons his slacks and lowers the zip, so the top of his dark boxer briefs poke through. He palms at himself. Presses his lips together as a muffled grunt stifles in his throat.
The subtle movement of his muscles beneath his warm skin has you entranced. He's human, yes, but built like a God. Worshipping him feels like the only appropriate course of action - and yet as he guides you over and positions you how he likes it - face down, ass up - he's the one who's gonna be worshipping you.
Eyes closed, you smile into the scent of his sheets. Hadn't realised how much you missed how soft they always are; cotton fresh and a worthy home for the night. Of all the boys you've ever dated, not of them have cared in the same way that Jeongguk does about his laundry.
He's like that in all aspects of his life, though. Details. His senses. They align and overlap, and Jeongguk has to have things in a specific way, otherwise he isn't happy.
You confuse him, in that way. You're haphazard to a fault, and Jeongguk knows that glitter never really fit into his idea of what it takes to build a home, but he misses it being on his sheets.
He pushes your dress up, over your ass. Doesn't look at your satin-covered pussy 'cause he's trying to hold off. Grapples the flesh of your ass, then delivers a short, sharp spank. Likes the way you gasp, then sigh.
Doesn't like that he can't see the smile he knows is on your lips though.
It's all rather confusing. This is how he likes to do things.
And yet he finds himself getting you back into your original position. Walks over to his door. Checks it's locked.
Jeongguk turns around to look at you, eyes dark, his intentions perfectly clear.
He prowls a little closer. Taps on your knees and encourages you to open your legs. Not once does his gaze drop from your eyes. Not when your legs spread, not when he lowers himself, not when he can fucking smell your arousal. He wants to. Wants to look at your pretty little pussy so badly - but he'd locked in on your eyes.
His hands slide up your thighs, pushing your dress to your hips. Your underwear is black, and your wetness has seeped through - but he doesn't acknowledge it. Not yet.
He lowers his lips, but keeps his eyes on yours still, as he presses a wet kiss to your thigh. Up he odesseys; one, two, three kisses. A trail of evidence is left, little dewy marks mapping out his journey. He leans over. Repeats it on your other thigh.
One of his hands grips your waist, while the other strokes your thigh that's without his lips. He's taking his time. Keeping his eyes on you. Can see how your chest moves; knows that you're as desperate for this as he is. He licks his lips, and smirks.
"So patient," he husks, oh-so-affectionately. Squeezes the soft flesh of your thigh. Loves how you feel. So warm, and soft, and made for him. "Such a good girl for me, aren't you?"
You nod, a tiny whine catching on your lips.
"What was that?" He asks, before his eyes finally glance down towards your covered cunt. It's only supposed to be for a second, but he didn't anticipate quite how wet you'd already be; how it would be shining through the fabric of your panties. They're silky today, and it just makes your slick look even messier.
He inhales a deep breath, and lets out a shallow laugh as his head drops in defeat. Can't even play it cool. He wants you. Wants you more than he needs air to breathe.
It's just pheromones, and he knows this. Knows how gets when he likes a girl. Knows how fucking nasty he can get in pursuit of her scent. In the very worst cases, he finds himself enjoying feet . Underarms. Underwear. Anywhere that's gonna release them.
He always liked the smell of your perfume; the fragrances you'd layer over yourself to mask your natural scent - but it's 5am, and you've been in a club all evening. Your perfume has worn off. This is all you.
And he knows he's utterly screwed.
His lips trail up your thigh. Head tilts. It's his nose, now, that's making contact with your clothed cunt. He's slow. Tepid. Taking his time, 'cause he's thought about this during so many lonely nights and doesn't wanna waste it.
His nose rests against the fabric that's keeping you away from him. His perpetually dewy nose dampens as he nudges against you. He inhales. Is shaky, in the way that he breathes. "Fuck."
The pressure of his nose against you deepens. He groans. Mumbles some incoherent shit about how fucking good you smell. Presses his lips against the soaked satin. Kisses. Get his lips all glossy.
He kitten licks, then drags his tongue up your underwear. Knows he'll get so much more of your taste if he just takes them off, but he's scared. Worries that having your cunt in his mouth will ruin him for the rest of his life.
And so he continues taking his time. Uses his tongue. Teases where he thinks your clit could be. He's not too far off, but it's hidden by your folds that have swollen quite considerably. He's teasing too much. Getting you too needy. His thumb presses over the wettest part of your panties, where he knows your hole must be. The way the material gives just a little, and the way you sigh into his touch only proves this.
"Please," you whisper.
Jeongguk nods, not once losing contact with your cunt, until he slowly pulls back. Runs his fingers over your soaked panties. Studies the way they cling to you. Looks up at you as he gently massages you. Runs his index finger under the laces edge of your panties. "You want them off, B?"
The way you're looking at him - eyes all wide, lips pouty - has him desperate for you. You could ask him to spend eternity with his face buried in your cunt, and he thinks he would.
He taps the side of your thigh - "hips" - and encourages you to raise yourself. His fingers hook over the sides of your underwear.
"Dress," he says, indicating his desire for you to take that off too, now that you can. Is too busy staring at your cunt, and the way your slick juices string to your underwear as he pulls them down to even realise you're taking it off. Bra, too.
Jeongguk is tentative as he gets your panties off. Hold your feet as he slips your ankle through them, and repeats. Doesn't get rid of them immediately.
He's so fucking hard he thinks he might die - and it only gets worse when he brings your sopping wet panties to his nose. It's lewd . The way he inhales your scent is erotic to the point of it being perverse - but it has you leaking for him. His dark eyes fall open, and land on yours.
The material hooks over his fingers, as Jeongguk reaches over to squeeze one of your tits. He's missed them. Will scream 'I'm an ass guy' until the cows come home, but knows it's your nipples he'll be sucking on when you inevitably milk him of his cum a little later. Your panties drag over the hardened bud of your nipple as he toys with you. Smears your juices all over it. Glistens as Jeongguk sits up a little to bring your panties to your mouth.
"Wanna see how good you taste?" He asks, as if you aren't parting your lips for him regardless. You nod, all pathetic and needy as your tongue rests flat for him to do as he pleases - which, at the moment, is pushing your slick-covered panties into your mouth. Thinks they'll probably help. Will muffle your whines, at least. Works a treat as you whimper a little when he taps your jaw. 'Close your mouth', he's saying silently - and so you do.
He pulls back a little, fingers dipping to slide between your folds, eyes on your face, still. Smirks. Uses the fingers that aren't exploring your slippery cunt to squeeze at your chest. Your eyes are so wide. You whimper. He deliberately didn't stuff your underwear completely in your mouth. Likes seeing the satin. Likes knowing how willing you are to do anything for him. His thumb swipes over the slick on your nipple. Massages it in - and decides it's a waste. Leans down to latch his lips around your hardened bud.
He's the one whining now. Loves the way you feel in his mouth. Loves licking the taste from your skin. The fingers toying with your folds search for your slit, and push themselves into you as Jeongguk sucks on your nipple.
Not a boob guy, not a boob guy, not a boob guy - and yet as he pulls himself back, releasing you with a slight pop from the suction of his lips leaving your nipple, he smiles. Watches the way your tit wobbles, all soft, nipples hard, desperate for his return. He pushes his fingers deeper inside of you. Tells you how much he's missed them.
He reaches up to hook your panties in his fingers again. Pulls them from your mouth. Tosses them down. The way you're whimpering deserved to be heard, he decides.
His lips press a chaste kiss to your other nipple. Tongue flicks. He sucks. Just for a second. He's got places to be; a cunt plugged with his fingers that he's dying to taste again. Trailing down your skin, his lips leave a pretty dewy trail.
You hadn't been expecting the night to end like this, so while you're nice and neat and trimmed, your pussy is a little less bare than normal. Jeongguk likes it. Would never impose his preferences, but knows that this is it. Always has been. Enjoys the way your slick catches in your hair; how messy you look for him. Your juices string across your folds, and decides he can't keep his tongue away any longer.
The first lick is slow. Flat. He whines against you. Stalls his fingers, 'cause he wants to focus on the sensation; how warm you are, how delicious he thinks you taste. His tongue flicks as he reaches the northernmost point of your folds, and the way your body shudders a little is indication enough that he knows exactly where to focus. Of course he does. Your clit has swollen just as much as your folds, desperate for a little relief.
He doesn't give you it. Not yet. The lewd sounds of his fingers pushing back into your cunt makes him smirk. You're so unbelievably wet. Wetter than he thinks he's ever had you - and you've never been exactly dry for him. Maybe it's the alcohol. Maybe you've missed him. Maybe it's both. When his tongue presses back into your folds, you know it's neither of those things.
You're soaked because he just knows what he's doing. Understands your body. Drags his tongue up and down your cunt, fingers fucking themselves into you. The sensation is unbearable. You need more - and more is what he gives you when his spare hand eases your lips apart, spreading your pussy so that he can get better access to your clit. The tip of his tongue massages against you ever so gently. He's careful not to be too aggressive - until he spits at it.
"Shit," you whine, letting your back sink into his sheets. You'd been watching, but now all you want to do is feel . You're scared that watching him - his pretty lashes splayed over the top of his cheeks, his dewy, wet, nose nudging your clit, the way his tongue laps against it- will finish you off too quickly. And that's before you even consider the mirror on the far wall, and the way his broad back looks perfectly positioned with your legs hooked over his shoulders.
He spreads his spit with his thumb. Smirks as your body shudders. "You okay, B?"
"Mhmm," you mumble, teeth biting the pad of your palm beneath your thumb. You're trying to keep quiet.
"Asked you a question," he says as his thumb builds speed, flicking over you gently. He's careful, but controlled. Your body writhes from his touch, legs pushing down on his shoulders, encouraging his face back to where he belongs. He almost whispers as his lips ghost your clit. "Tell me you're okay. Chess is always an option."
Why the fuck you'd wanna play chess is beyond you - and then you remember. Oh, he's so attentive. So kind. So gentle. So deserving of a blowjob.
"I'm okay," you promise, and Jeongguk finally lets his lips wrap around your clit. There's a provocative nature to the way he lets himself get all breathless and grunty. His tongue licks tenderly against your clit, but his fingers have been going for so long he's scared he'll cramp.
The way you whimper when he pulls them out is like music to his ears. Needy and pathetic. Gets his cock all hard.
You loved being plugged by him. Love the fullness he gives you. Hate to lose it.
His hands push back your thighs now. He studies you. Watches the clear fluid leak from you. Knows that your pussy must be desperate for his cock. Doesn't want to let any go to waste, so quickly licks it up. Sinks his tongue into the entrance of your hole. Can't go too far, but doesn't care to. Just wants to tease. To taste you. Drink nectar straight from the source.
One of your hands clasps over his fingers by your thigh. The other tenderly scratches at his scalp. You love his hair like this, all messy and indicative of the fact he's been up to no good. As he pulls away from you, lips glossy, a string of slick briefly keeping him attached to you, lip ring coated in the very essence of you, you decide you never want another face between your legs again. He's too pretty. You'll always compare.
He looks up at you with total adoration, a lopsided grin on his face as you scratch behind his ear. He's well aware he must look like a fucking puppy dog, but he doesn't care.
"You're so good," you tell him. Want him to know. Smirk, because you're aware of the dog parallels, too. "Such a good boy."
That shouldn't make Jeongguk's cock twitch as much as it does.
The hand in his hair encourages him back down, and he decides to show you just how good he really can be. His tongue roams between your folds, licking, and lapping. He's fast, and he's intentional, lips pouting as they press kisses against you, and even more so when they suck your sensitive bud between them.
Eyes closed, hands in his hair, legs wrapping around his head, you think of how pretty he is; how unspoilt his features are. You've never seen a nose so perfectly sloped or a cupid's bow so idyllic. It's the perfect ridge for your juices to gather, and Jeongguk knows this. Already isn't looking forward to his shower, 'cause he doesn't wanna lose the scent of you.
His pace increases. Fingers sink back into you. He's taking you for all you're worth; will win your orgasm fair and square. Needs it. Thinks he'll die without it.
The sounds of Jeongguk eating your pussy echo into his room; his fingers pushing you to the point of no return as his tongue massages you to a hedonistic state of being. The pressure in the very pit of your tummy builds. Your grip on his hair tights. You curse. Whimper.
"Right there. Fuck . Right there."
He doesn't ease. Gets faster. Edges and edges until he can edge no further. The wave crashes over; your release dizzying and detrimental all in one blow. It jolts through you, legs shaking, hot walls clenching, breathless mewls of pleasure letting Jeongguk know just how well he did. He doesn't stop. Pushes you further. Gets you gasping.
"Gguk," you whimper. "I- Fuck."
He nods against you. Doesn't stop. Lets his nose nestle into your folds. Holds his tongue back, just to say, "this cunt... fuck ."
You giggle, now. Jeongguk feels you tightening as you do so. Eases his fingers from you. Keeps you spread apart. Wants to see how messy you are - but is cut short when you say, "c'mere."
He doesn't even think about it. Just discards himself of his clothes and comes to join you on his bed. Will do anything you ask of him. There's a silly little smile on his pussy-drenched lips as his head nestles next to yours, face still covered in glitter. He's so heavenly like this; so angelic when he's unmistakably yours.
You aren't really thinking as you move closer. Your natural inclination is to kiss him, for a job well done. You realise just in time. Stop yourself. Grin as you nudge your nose against his, not caring for the fact he's covered in your cunt.
He grins, too. Laughs a little. "Was that okay?"
You nod. Wanna kiss him so badly. Speak, just stop yourself. Echo a thought you've shared before. "You really should start an only fans."
He laughs again. It's hearty and wholesome, and pure - or as pure as it can be, when he's covered in evidence of making your pussy cum. Neither of you really care for cleaning up just yet. His smile is too big. Dimples too deep. Lines beneath his eyes too telling of his happiness. God, he's missed you.
"I'd be no good on my own," he tells you. "Would need you to help me out."
You protest. Tell him to buy one of those fake pussy fuck-toys. Says it's all he needs. He corrects you. Tells you they're fleshlights, but doesn't tell you he's got one hidden in the back of his drawer from a particularly dry spell.
"No, not those," you say. "I mean like, the full torso ones. The ones with tits."
"Why would I want one of them?" He smirks, as his hands are quite literally squeezing at your boobs. He's just keeping them warm. That's all. "Ass guy."
You don't even dignify him with a verbalised response. Just tilt your head down to where Jeongguk is rolling your nipples between his thumbs and forefingers.
"What?" He feigns indifference.
"Your lies will catch up with you," you promise him. He pushes your tits up as far as he can, dipping down to suck delicately on your nipples. Just for a couple of seconds. Maybe five. Six. Okay, ten - but you feel so nice in his mouth, so soothing - and then it's twenty seconds. Thirty. Forty.
He switches nipples. Repeats. Pulls away. Is so hard he thinks he might cum prematurely if he doesn't get a release soon.
You've completely altered his sense of desire. Ruined him for anyone else. You'd argue you've made him better. Deep down, he'd know it to be true.
"Gguk?"
"Hmm?" he mumbles a little lazily against your skin.
You toy with his hair, raking your finger through his silky waves. Any product he had been wearing in it seems to be redundant now, your hands too busy messing with it for it to hold its shape. He had looked so pretty all night.
Looks prettiest, now.
"I'm sorry I stole your chance to have a New Year's kiss," you say, thinking of how many girls must have wanted him.
The smile on his face falters a little. He's quiet for a moment, then speaks with absolute sincerity. "Meant what I said. I've a whole year for kisses, B. They can wait. Wanted to be with you when New Year came in."
"I feel bad," you whisper.
"Don't." He opens his eyes, and sees how stark your self-imposed guilt is. Your hands are still toying with his hair, so he holds onto your wrists and rests the pad of his thumb in the palm of your hand. Is contented when your fingers close down on it. He shakes your hand a little, and smiles tenderly. "Don't. Really, B. Are you sad?" He asks. "That you didn't have one, I mean? Did you want one?"
Answers are complex when they're both yes and no; much like this one. You would have wanted one for the sake of enjoying a silly little tradition - but you didn't wanna kiss a stranger, and didn't want to kiss those close to you, either.
And so you deflect with a joke. "Why? Are you offering?"
Stupid joke. Stupid fuckin' joke .
Jeongguk knows it's a joke. Weighs up how he could respond. Sincerity seems too heavy. Joking back seems too careless.
And so he tries honesty.
"Yeah," he whispers. "I am."
His lips ghost yours, 'cause he'll never be the one to put pressure behind them first. He wants to. Is dying to.
Thinks, in classic Jeongguk style, that he'll die if can't do it one day soon.
The way you always get so close to him, suffocate him in your hair and the scent of your perfume, drives him mad. He's spent so many hours trying not to kiss you. Has never shared the taste of your tongue, but has shared oxygen with you. Thinks there's nothing to be scared of - but knows that you are.
He'll never ridicule your fears. Not intentionally.
And so he is patient, and perfectly restrained with you.
Some say it's a virtue.
Yet as you wish he'd just do it - rip the band aid - you can't help but think of it as a vice.
He'll never do you wrong. Sometimes you wish he would.
But that's the thing about wishes. There's no divine intervention from an arbitrary God. No stars changing alignment. The luck you manifest is yours and yours alone. Wishes come true because you will it to be that way.
Jeongguks grip on your waist tightens as your nose nudges deeper against his. There's a deliberate nature to your movements; how your hand rests on his jaw and how your leg hooks over his hip. The fluidity of your bodies together makes it so easy.
The grip on your waist is diverted to your ass. His fingers squeeze. Lips pout. Hips roll.
He husks your name. Not disco ball. Not Byeol. Your actual fucking name. Fucking whines against your lips. Can barely fuckin' breathe. "Please."
Your lips brush his. No pressure. Just aligning. Seeing how his lip ring feels. Jeongguk's semi begins to stiffen as he rubs himself against you again. His breathing is fucked.
Slowly - nervously, timidly - you slip your lips between his. Sink into the space left between them. Your bottom lip is plush between his. He doesn't press down. He waits. Waits and waits and waits. Has been waiting for months. What hurt will a few seconds do?
The hand you're resting on his jaw pulls him closer. Dictates his moves. This is all up to you.
The way your body nervously awaits the pressure you're refusing to apply is so telling. The delicate buds of your nipples that Jeongguk has grown to adore are hard against his bare chest. He's having to be careful as he rubs up against you, because your pussy is getting wetter and wetter. Coated in everything you are, Jeongguk's throbbing cock slides between your folds, massaging you in a way that you'll never grow tired of.
Jeongguk wants to speak; to encourage you.
Any words spoken would result in the closing of his lips and the removal of your ability to choose this - and so he stays quiet. Moans a little when the friction of his foreskin sliding back against your wet folds gets a little too good.
You smile. Like the way it feels. Can feel the slick build, then leak from the depths of your cunt. Know that you're one overly-eager rut away from him fucking himself into you.
Maybe you should pull away. Maybe you should let him fuck you instead.
But you've come so far.
You're safe. Warm. Content. With your favourite person in the whole entire world.
If you can't kiss him, then who the fuck can you kiss?
You still your hips. So does he. Deepen the position of your lips, until you know they can go no further. His nose is nestled next to yours, a shallow breath reminding you that life will go on - you'll still breathe - even if your lips close down on his.
He's always told you that he's not scared of you.
It's time to reciprocate that.
And so silently, as you press your lips down into his, you let go of a fear that's been holding you back for far too long.
It takes Jeongguk a moment to kiss you back. He wants to be sure you're sure.
But you are.
His lips slowly accept this new sensation; the softness of your bottom lip, the feeling of your nose as it nudges against his, the pining sensation that's so often left on his lips being remedied.
He's kissing you. Slowly, silently, serenely. It lasts for hours, but also for just a second. You're not sure which is more accurate as your lips naturally part for a moment; to breathe. To assess. To realign. To repeat.
He kisses you again. Once. Twice. Deeper, a third time. His hips begin to rut. His moans vibrate against you. The slipperiness of your pussy is juxtaposed to the innocence of such pure kisses. Lips still on his, you reach down to where your bodies are so well acquainted, it's like interrupting a conversation. Your nimble fingers wrap around Jeongguk's length. He moans. Wants to say something, but can't. Doesn't want to stop kissing you.
You move your hips. Line him up. Nod into the kiss. A hard breath exhales from his nose against your cheek, his whine echoing into your mouth as the tip of his cock penetrates your entrance. The fit is tight - snug - but so welcome. It's like coming home, he thinks.
"You're so fucking good," he whines into your lips, then presses down against them once more. "Such a good fuckin' girl for me."
He means it. You are good for him. Give him somewhere he belongs; somewhere he'll never feel alien. A girl full of galaxies, yet he's home no matter which cosmic entity you remind him of on any given day of the week.
You whine a little as his hips pulse up, pushing his dick into you. He's so big, and you're still so sensitive from how well he ate you out earlier, but you think you'd rather die than not see this through. You'll take the overstimulation, take whatever he'll give you, just to feel that fullness you only get from him.
Jeongguk grunts as he fucks himself into you. Gets breathless. Gets moany. Gets mean. Nasty.
"Gonna nut inside you," he tells you. You smirk against his lips. You love it when he gets all chatty and tells you all kinds of shit he never would if he wasn't on the brink of an orgasm. "God, I'm gonna fill your pussy up with my cum. Gonna fill you so well. Fill you forever."
That's not exactly how anatomy works and you go to tell him as such - but he changes position. Gets you on your back. Sits on his heels. Grips your waist with one hand, your chest with the other. Squeezes. Gets you whining. He pulses his hips slowly. Once. Fuck . Twice. Yes . And then he's back to a pace that feels more like him; fast and rough.
The sound of his skin slapping against yours is almost as loud as the breathless moans you can't be bothered to hide. He's making you feel so good as he pumps himself into you. It's only fair he knows just how well he's doing.
He squeezes at one of your boobs. Pinches your nipple. Pulls a little. Makes you moan. Does the same to the other side. Watches as they move from the momentum of his hips. Is fucking obsessed. Can't believe he wasted so many years convinced he was an ass guy. Loves your ass, granted, but fuck .
And when your hand sinks down to play with your clit while he's fucking his fat cock into your tight hole? God. Jeongguk thinks he might just die.
Tells you so.
"Gonna kill me off, you are."
You giggle. The way your pussy throbs around him? Yeah. Chances of death? Rapidly increasing.
"Feel good?" you check, just in case.
He nods. Wishes you could experience what it's like to fuck you; how good feel. How much he loves being trapped inside you. Makes his already desperate cock throb when he has those moments of clarity; he's fucking you. His cock? It's inside you. It's a simple thought process, but one that always overwhelms him.
Sinking down to suck on your nipples, tits in a white-knuckle death grip, Jeongguk knows if he thinks in any great depth, then that will be it. He'll cum. He wants this to last. Knows it can - but also knows your pussy is gonna make him cum so so soon.
So lost in his thoughts, he almost doesn't notice when you call his name. If it weren't for your hand cupping beneath his chin and pulling him down, he might not have realised at all. "Gguk?"
He follows your lead. Is about to sink his lips in yours when he replies, "Yeah, baby?"
He doesn't mean to call you that. Knows he absolutely should not have called you that. Kisses you again to distract from the fact he did. Ruts into you faster. Harder. Revels in the tightness of your walls, and the softness of your lips.
Knows he should check what you needed, but it was nothing, Just wanted him to look at you. But he'd called you baby. Oh, you're all sorts of fucked up. Try not to think about it. Your distraction method? A kiss . The waters are getting so muddy. This is so bad. Detrimental.
But fuck. He's close. So close. Doesn't wanna stop; any of it. Doesn't wanna stop fucking you. Doesn't wanna stop kissing you. God. He can't believe he can . Can't believe he knows what your moans sound like when they're vibrating into his mouth. Can barely wrap his head around the fact your tongue is in his mouth. He thinks he's going crazy. Thinks he might have already died. There's no way he can feel this at home inside another person's body.
But he does.
Knows that there's no pussy that's ever gotten him like this. Would be foolish to think you're the only person who will ever make him feel this way, but he quite enjoys playing the fool.
Jeongguk's skin is clammy. Sweat beads on his skin. Some of it catches on your skin as you move your hands from his back to cup his sharp jaw, and find yourself obsessed . Primitive desire, you think. Just like Jeongguk's obsession with your scent. All just survival of the fittest, built to breed, type shit. Of all the people he could fuck his sperm into, his body seems to think you'd be a good match. He trusts it. Agrees with it.
"Fucking me so well," you tell him. "Working so hard."
He nods, forehead resting in the crook of your neck. "Working so hard, B. Wanna make you feel good."
There are no words to articulate the way Jeongguk feels inside of you. No size grand enough, no adjective complimentary enough. No sensation even close to the euphoria that comes with being fucked by Jeon Jeongguk.
You press a tiny little kiss to his lips. "You do." And then you kiss him again. Deeper. Tug on his bottom lip with his teeth. Get him whining. His cock stalls. Left leg begins to shake. His right will follow, but it's always in that order. Left, then right. The way he whimpers into your mouth makes you wanna edge him for all of eternity - but he deserves this orgasm.
"Where should I- Fuck. Byeol, I'm there. I'm gonna- Fuck . Where do you want it?"
"Tits," you say without a second thought. You wanna watch him cum. Wanna see it. Wanna see how pretty his cock looks as his cum pulses out of it.
You hate how it feels when Jeongguk pulls out - how empty you are - but when he's shakily getting himself in position, jaw hanging slack, brows threaded together, lewd moans escaping his mouth as he wanks him over your tits, you know its worth it.
"That's it," you encourage. "All over my tits."
Jeongguk curses. Tightens the way he's straddling over you. Tugs at himself. Loses his fucking mind when your hand wraps around his. He lets go. It's all you; one hand around his shaft, the other softly playing with his balls. "Yeah. Yeah, Like that. Oh, fuck."
His legs shake; torso tenses. Has to grab onto his headboard just to keep himself from fucking keeling over. He's stimulated to a point he doesn't think he's reached before. Doesn't even feel like his body is his.
"Cumming," he mumbles. "I'm fucking cumming."
The way his cock twitches, balls tightening, is enough to confirm this. You keep going.
"All over my tits," you say again, just to really drive it home. "Good boy."
His whimpers are quiet as he unloads his cum onto you in thick, creamy spurts. You hold his cock against one of your tits, and let his spunk trail down them. A few more releases drip onto your skin. He sits up straighter. Looks at the mess. Wants to fuck you all over again.
He grips his still-hard cock and spanks it against your cum-covered tits. Massages his leaky head against them; rubs his cum into your skin. Lets go of his cock. Grips your tits instead. Pushes them both together, and watches as his cum smears all over them. Squeezes your nipples. Wants them in his mouth. Moves a little down the bed, and positions himself beside you. Encourages you to face him as his tongue licks against your cummy chest. He circles around your nipple. Takes it in his mouth. Sucks. One of his hands grips your other boob. Holds it close to his face so he can switch between your nipples, of which he does. Sucks for a moment or so. Teases with his tongue. Then switches. It's a back and forth that has you going insane.
And when his spare hand dips down to play with your folds? Sinks a finger back into your soaked cunt? Heaven. He fucks a second finger into you. A third. Keeps his lips suctioned around your nipples, utterly obsessed with the way it feels to have them in his mouth.
He's a little careless with his fingers, but it's exactly what you need to come undone again. You need it rough. Need him to override the overstimulation you're fighting. It doesn't take long. Your body writhes, but he keeps you close. Doesn't bother talking you through it. You both know it's his tongue against your sensitive nipples that's working the magic. Words would be wasted.
Your orgasm hits you hard. Fast. It waves over you so violently that you almost kick him. Jeongguk smirks as he begins to feel your orgasm contract around his fingers.
Your wetness seeps from you, Jeongguk still plugging your pussy. Your muscles are tight in a way he doesn't think he's experienced before. Your climax is violent. All consuming. You have to bite his pillow just to stop yourself from screaming.
It's never felt like this before. He doesn't relent. Is obsessed. It's so much wetter than usual. Your whimpers are different, too. The way your legs shake? The way you can't fucking breathe? How your pussy is quite literally clamping his fingers inside of you? It's all different. It's so much more than an orgasm.
He's never taken you this far beyond the point of a climax. Didn't know you could do this. Has only ever seen it in fucking porn. Sort of thought it was a myth - but you're squirting for him. Because of him. On him.
He will die, and you absolutely will be the cause of it.
"Fuck, B," Jeongguk curses against your lips as he realises what's happening. Keeps going. Fucks his fingers into you, still. His hand is getting wetter, still . You shake, still ; squirt, still . Jeongguk's gonna fuckin' die. That's all he can think about. Death, and pussy. His, and yours. Hell, and heaven. "That's it. Squirt for me, B. Such a good girl."
You nod, almost delirious from the pleasure he's administering. His fingers fuck into you still, your pussy contracting around him.
Eyes closed, teeth pressing down on your bottom lip, you can't think of anything except the sensation of your pussy giving itself up for him. The wave of pleasure was so intense that you hadn't noticed your release at first; not until the lewd sounds of his fingers inside of you became louder, and Jeongguk himself had realised.
You don't even really have grasp on the fact it happened. Knew that it could, but you've been the only person to ever get yourself that far. Never has someone else ever made you squirt. You don't think you ever really trusted anyone enough with your body to give it up entirely.
But Jeongguk is Jeongguk. There's nothing to be scared of.
"Koo," you whimper as you finally get some control over yourself, body jolting from the intensity of it all.
He's slow to withdraw his fingers. Doesn't want to, but also knows he has to be gentle.
"I know, baby," he husks a little breathlessly, as he presses a kiss into your shaky lips. "I know."
In all honesty, he doesn't know. Doesn't have a clue what you could possibly be thinking. Just knows he's feeling all sorts of fucked up, and that you probably are, too.
It's been a long night. You've both been through it.
But you both feel overwhelmingly at ease.
"Sorry," he whispers. Presses a kiss against your hair.
"Mhmm?" You question, still deliriously spent. There's so much to do. Sheets to change. Showers to be had. You just wanna laze with him a little while longer. "What for?"
Jeongguk holds you close. Doesn't wanna lose this, either. He knows how you get once the morning comes and regrets start creeping in. He's doing damage control early. Letting you know that it's okay.
"I broke your rules," he says, as if you weren't a willing participant.
You shake your head. You kissed him first. Kissed him when he called you baby. Rewarded him for his misdemeanours. Of course he'd be a repeat offender. You're just as much to blame.
"Don't do that."
"Apologise?"
"Don't put all the blame on you. It's not," you say, before leaning up to steal an ever-so-sacred kiss from his lips. "There. I did it. I broke them. My fault."
"B-"
"If you try and apologise I'm gonna think you regret it," you tell him.
Jeongguk shuts up. Plans to remain silent. Can't help himself, though. Thinks it's important you know how he feels about you, and the birds, and this whole fuckin' mess.
"I've never regretted a thing we've done, B. Never."
His tone consumes you. Is so serious. So sincere. It makes you nervous - so you deflect.
"What about that time we accidentally ordered the extra spicy tteokbokki?"
He smiles. Laughs. Is serene as he eases up. "Okay. One regret."
You kiss him. Lips soft. Touch tender. Just 'cause you can. Just 'cause you wanna.
Have resigned yourself to the fact this is one-night-only kind of thing; that come the next morning, you'll laugh about it.
'Can you believe we kissed?' 'Let's never do that again.' 'So weird.' 'Just a friendly kiss. Sort of like kissing a fish, actually.' 'I'm gonna sew your mouth shut one day.'
And so for now, as Jeongguk encourages you up - "c'mon. Shower. You get in. I'll sort the sheets. Will join you in a second, okay?" - and kisses you again before you leave, you revel in it.
You stand alone under the crashing water, wondering what the fuck you've just done. Contemplating how badly this will all end up biting you in the arse.
Jeongguk does much the same. Looks at himself in the mirror; naked and alone. Can see evidence of you all over his skin - scratch marks, pretty purple bouquets delivered by your lips, the sheen of your slick - and decides he likes himself better this way. Doesn't think he'll look like himself when it's all washed away.
He makes up his bed. Puts a fresh sheet down, and tosses the old one by his door, ready for a wash. Goes to chuck his pillows on the floor - and then just doesn't. If you want the space, he'll give you it, no questions asked. He doesn't want the space, though. Wants you in his bed again. Wants you close.
And as he comes to join you in the shower, a protective arm slinking around your waist, lips pressed into your neck, you know that you don't want to be alone. Not for the rest of the night, at least. The glitter might wash away, but this feeling? He's not certain.
You're not sure that waking up beside him will be sensible for your fragile heart, but can't stand the idea of not falling asleep beside him. He's so warm. It's the smart thing to do. Will save on his heating bill.
A good decision, you think.
But since when have you ever been good at those?
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AO3 | MASTERLIST | MINORS DNI
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glossdebut · 17 days ago
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PRICE OF FAME | MYG ★ CH. 1 TEASER
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✧ PAIRING: yoongi x fem!reader
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✧ SUMMARY: You were about ready to give up, your career nowhere near what you dreamed it’d be when you started at eighteen, bright-eyed and naive. Reality for you these past few years has consisted of pouting at a camera, ignoring whispers of your name at company events, and ensuring that the stupid, tiny designer purses they keep forcing on you can at least carry a flask. But now, you’re helping a friend in need. For the first time in a long time, it feels like you’re doing something worthwhile with your life. Too bad Min Yoongi, the newest thorn in your side, seems insistent on stopping you. 『 series masterlist 』
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✧ TEASER WARNINGS: none!
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✧ NOTES: aaaah!!! i was going to wait a little while to drop this but i couldn't resist. consider this an introduction to the boys! i hope that this is a suitable teaser to kick off the series. this teaser is un-beta'd thus far, so wording is subject to change when i reach the editing stage. please feel free to sound off in the replies or my inbox with thoughts/questions! <3
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✧ TEASER WORDCOUNT: 733 words
✧ STATUS: ch. 1 scheduled to drop on nov. 6, 2024!
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With a flash of lights and a cacophony of sound, Burn The Stage launches into their first song on the setlist. The crowd roars around you, but you’re not here as a fan, so you try to remember everything Jeongguk taught you in preparation for tonight.
If you weren’t already close, most everything there is to learn about Jeon Jeongguk himself could easily be found with a simple Naver search.
Not only is Jeongguk the lead vocalist and rhythm guitarist of Burn The Stage, but he’s also the de facto face of the band, and he couldn’t be better suited for the job. He’s beautiful. Like, seriously beautiful. Well-built and knows it, sings songs about love and sex and anger with the sweetest voice known to man, covered in tattoos and piercings that eommas everywhere pretend to disapprove of when they’re actually ogling just as much as their daughters. He’s a teenage girl’s wet dream, and with that comes hordes of them using the deductive skills of the NIS to figure out the last time he took a shit. Very little in his life is a secret, whether he likes it or not.
The rest of the band, in turn, gets the luxury of a little bit of mystery.
Park Jimin, drummer, and Kim Taehyung, bassist. Jeongguk’s best friends in the world. You’ve met them both in passing before, at industry events here and there, and they both seemed nice enough. 
Jimin has a bit of a reputation for being temperamental, angry, but the way Jeongguk describes him paints him as something gentle. Childhood friends who’ve known each other since scraped knees and runny noses. 
It’s public knowledge that Jimin wanted to be a dancer, before this—that when he was in college, he suffered an injury that ended his dancing career before it even started. One moment he was one of the most promising ballet students in Seoul, and the next he was retired at nineteen. He doesn’t like to talk about it, but every time the band is interviewed the question is inevitably asked. Do you have any regrets? You’ve watched the videos, seen the way he shakes with anger even as he answers with a saccharine smile. You have a feeling getting along with Jimin won’t pose any challenges for you. You know a thing or two about regrets.
Taehyung is a bit harder to figure out, but not in any way that sparks concern. He’s just an interesting guy that way. 
He was the last to join the band, the first to answer a ‘BASS PLAYER NEEDED’ ad posted around the city. Apparently, he was so good that they didn’t feel the need to call anyone else.
He lives in his own world, does his own thing. Posts very artistic photodumps on his Instagram with concerningly cryptic captions. He’s quiet when he’s around people he doesn’t know, but when he’s put in a room with Jimin and Jeongguk he becomes the loudest person there. He’s kind, caring, always seems to know the right thing to say even if it’s delivered in the strangest manner possible.
Jimin and Taehyung won’t cause any problems for you. Jeongguk assured you that they’d be easy to win over, that as long as Jeongguk likes you, you’re in with them. 
The real wild card is the guitarist. Min Yoongi.
According to Jeongguk, Burn The Stage wouldn’t even exist if it weren’t for Yoongi. When the band formed, they were just dumb kids with a shared dream, but Yoongi was the one to set it all in motion. 
When they didn’t have anywhere to practice, Yoongi convinced the ajumma he worked for to let him cram as much equipment as he could fit into a tiny noraebang room. When venues wouldn’t book them without the guarantee that they would draw a crowd, Yoongi burned hundreds of CDs and stood on the streets of Hongdae begging people to listen. When shady entertainment companies started offering them laughable contracts, Yoongi found Namjoon and somehow convinced him to manage them for dirt cheap. When they finally got an offer worth taking, Yoongi made them mull it over for as long as they possibly could. Weigh the pros and cons and decide if it was what they really wanted.
If Jeongguk is the face of the band, Yoongi is the heart. Unfortunately for you, this particular heart is very well-guarded.
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✧ TAGLIST: @jajabro @pitchblack0309 @sugar-snap @ot72025 @ktownshizzle @futuristicenemychaos @tea4sykes @sugainmybowl
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kookieskookiejar · 1 year ago
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Alpha! Jeongguk x Omega! Reader
This is a part two of Don't Blame Me, but can be read as a standalone as well :))
Synopsis:
It's been two years since you've moved in with Jeongguk, and since then, the global tour your dance academy was on has since ended long ago, allowing you to have more time to spend with your boyfriend. However, Jeongguk still feels like the two of you have been going around in circles in terms of where your relationship is at. Should Jeongguk make a move to ask you about it? Or is he just being worried for no reason and should just let the relationship grow at its own pace?
Warnings: unprotected s*x, upcoming rut mating, marking, knotting, bre*ding k*nk, really fluffy.
A/N: sorry this took soooo long, mental health has not been looking good lately so...yeah, I hope you guys like this!
Everyday Jeongguk wakes up feeling like the luckiest man in the universe, he can’t believe it’s been two years since you’ve moved in with him.
Your job hasn’t gotten any less busy, and Jeongguk respects that, he’s gotten busier lately too, and recently he just wrapped up a long term project, and now they’re out to celebrate with his friends, and that consists of you, his sister, Jihyo, his Namjoon hyung, and his girlfriend of two years now, yes, the resident third wheeler of the friend group is finally dating, Jihyo’s still doesn’t want to settle down yet, and that’s perfectly fine, in Jeongguk’s opinion, she needs some growing up to do before she sends someone to therapy.
To put things in perspective, he feels like everyone around him, other than his sister, have started the next chapter of their lives, okay maybe that’s a stretch, he’s just feeling a bit stagnant with you after hearing Namjoon talk about how he and his girlfriend are planning on getting a matching couple tattoo after sealing their mating mark.
Is it considered quick to seal the mating mark after two years? Maybe, but they are planning to get married next year, so it wasn’t a hasty decision, Jihyo even chastised them for making the decision only after two years, to which she deemed, too impulsive, so maybe two years is seen as hasty in this time and age, but that doesn’t make Jeongguk feel all that much better about the pace between you and him, not that he’d ever voice that out, he knows you want to take things slowly, you’ve always been a build the foundation type of person.
However, you and Jeongguk have been dating for four years now, and you haven’t brought up about the mating marks before, you did talk about it briefly, but it wasn’t even a serious conversation, although you sounded very much sincere.
So now Jeongguk’s sulking in the pub where all his friends are laughing about something they’re reading on Jihyo’s phone, absently, a pout is on his lips, and his hyung notices it immediately, snapping Jeongguk’s attention away from staring at the rustic decor of the pub.
“Hey, you’re tired, aren’t you? You haven’t been talking all that much tonight,” Namjoon points out, his brows furrowed, he’s always seen Jeongguk as his little brother, brothers from a different mother.
“Nah, I’m okay, I was just spacing out,” Jeongguk dismisses, finishing his drink.
“We can leave if you want,” you say, immediately, preparing to get up from your seat, grabbing your purse.
“Yah, he said he’s gonna buy us drinks with his bonus, don’t you try skimming out on us,” Jihyo complains, arms crossed.
“He’s tired, Jihyo ah, I’ll buy you drinks next time okay,” you promise with that sweet voice you use to get things out of both the siblings, something that Jeongguk can never say no to, to which his sister sighs, nodding begrudgingly.
“Be grateful she loves you, can’t believe my brother stole my best friend,” she says, obviously joking, and Jeongguk nods absentmindedly, letting you lead him out of the pub.
Jeongguk heads home to sleep off the fatigue, but it was probably due to his bad mood and the alcohol that made him sleepy.
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When Jeongguk woke up the next morning, he was feeling hot, but it wasn’t out of the ordinary to him, it is summer after all, but what had him questioning was the fact that you were cooking breakfast in the kitchen instead of going for your morning run with Jihyo.
Jeongguk clambers out of bed, messy hair and everything, hurrying to wash up, eager to have your cooking as breakfast.
“Hey. you’re up earlier than expected,” you joke when Jeongguk wraps his arms around your waist, his nose buried in your neck, lips almost slobbering near where your mating mark should be.
“It’s 9.30, of course I’m up,” Jeongguk says with a whiny voice, you just love to tease him, says that he sounds and looks cute when you do, so he indulges you.
“I don’t know, I thought you’d be more tired when you’re near your rut.”
Jeongguk freezes up at your comment, he was so busy that he hadn’t even noticed his scent had some minor changes over time, and he doused himself in cologne last night, craving for the scent of fresh laundry over his natural scent, so that’s probably why his friends hadn’t noticed.
“I didn’t want to tell you because I know you’d tell me to sleepover at Jihyo’s,” you say, turning around to run your hands over Jeongguk’s arms comfortingly, the act so sweet, but it instantly has Jeongguk hard.
“But, we, what if I accidentally mark you? What if your heat gets triggered? Then we’d have to-
“Hey, I’m ready, and I’m ready to have our mating marks now, I think it’s time, if you think you’re ready,” you reassured, you know he’s wanted this for quite some time now, but you were nervous, it isn’t an easy decision, choosing to be connected to someone in the closest way possible.
“But you’ll go into heat a bit later, don’t you have any performances lined up?” Jeongguk asked, eyes darting to every corner of your face to make sure you weren’t doing this out of obligation.
“I called out of work once I realised you were going into rut, and I’m really ready, Jeongguk, unless you’re not,” you look at him quizzically, but both of you know there’s no malice behind your tone, and the slight bossiness of your tone is certainly waking him up in more ways than one.
“How long till the brownies are done?” Jeongguk asked with a fluttering heart, he loves your brownies, and making it for breakfast is weird, but you love how weird he is, and you actively indulge in his quirkiness.
“About 20 minutes, think you could make me cum before they’re done?” you ask with a challenging tone, quickly taking off your apron.
“You bet,” Jeongguk says before he wraps his arms around your thighs, carrying you back to the bedroom where he emerged from not too long ago.
Jeongguk throws you on the bed lightly, getting a giggle out of you at the bounciness of the bed.
“Let’s see if you’ll be laughing in a bit, baby,” Jeongguk teases before he captures your lips with his, his lips still taste minty fresh from brushing his teeth.
Jeongguk breaks off the kiss to take off his shirt, his abs looking like they’re sculpted by greek gods under the morning rays.
Jeongguk manhandles you onto his thighs, he’s not a horny teenage alpha who can’t control his urges, but he just enjoys the process of having your cute butt grinding on his clothed cock.
You got the message quickly, rotating your hips in circular motions, arousal dampening Jeongguk’s sweatpants once his length starts to grow under your ministrations, getting turned on by the fact that you’re the only one with this sort of power over him.
“I need you fuck me, Jeongguk, 20 minutes, remember?” you remind him after having caught a whiff of the scent of chocolate mixing with your scents.
“Yeah, sure, baby,” Jeongguk promises, tugging your shirt up to reveal your bare breasts, your nipples pebbling up from the cool air of your shared bedroom, the AC still lingering in the air after you turned it off before leaving the room, catching the attention of your boyfriend, who quickly envelopes the closest nipple he could get to, sucking diligently, his other hand occupying your other boob, twisting, sucking, and licking, your back arching off into his hold, his free hand’s fingers dipping into the curve of your back, he tightens his hold on you before he ceases all actions.
“Present yourself, baby,” Jeongguk says, his voice dropping into a lower octave, his eyes flashing red, he’s not using his alpha voice, Jeongguk would rather chop off his dick than force you into having sex with him, he just knows you get your panties drenched whenever you hear his ‘sexy voice’, as you often call it, which is why you’re quick to get into position, hands and knees on the bed with your ass perched high for Jeongguk’s taking.
Jeongguk mutters curses under his breath at the sight of you, your pretty pussy shining with arousal that flows down to your smooth thighs, Jeongguk is definitely a lucky man.
When he starts dipping his fingers into your core, you whine.
“Just put it in, Guk, I’m ready,” you complain with a whine as you wiggle your butt enticingly, and it worked like magic, his hands smacking one of your cheeks, that recoil is going to kill him.
Then you feel it, the blunt tip finally breaching your walls, if your heat hasn’t started, it definitely has, with the way you get wetter with every inch Jeongguk feeds you, your omega accommodating to your alpha naturally.
When Jeongguk finally sinks his entire length into you, your toes curl at the feeling of being full.
“Can I move, baby?” Jeongguk asks, he knows the two of you are in a time crunch, but he’d rather let his favourite dessert burn than hurt you in any way.
“Yeah you can move,” you say breathlessly, Jeongguk steals your breath away at any situation, whether it’s because he’s fresh out of the shower, dressed up for a date, or merely cooking, he looks flawless executing what he does, especially in bed.
Jeongguk starts off with shallow thrusts, biting on his lower lip at the way your walls hug him right back deeper at every movement.
When Jeongguk feels your walls finally accommodating his size, he increases the pace of his thrusts, groaning when he feels you clenching onto his length when he finally hits that sweet spot that has you whining and body coursing in pleasurable ecstasy, your back arching into his touch, the sight of your round ass catching his attention, smacking your ass, hands grasping for a bit before he lets go, choosing to make his way to your pretty little clit.
Jeongguk knows you’re close, it’s written in the way you’re gripping him in an almost death grip.
“Cum for me, baby, need you to drench this cock so I can pop my knot inside you, fill you up with pups,” Jeongguk says with a groan by your ear before he feels his knot swelling, the added girth pushes you over the edge, your body spasming as you feel your breath being knocked out of you.
Soon after, Jeongguk’s knot starts to deflate, gushes of cum spilling into your womb, and that feeling kick starts this carnal need inside you.
“Need you to mark me, Guk, I’m ready, ready to be your mate,” you confess, still clenching onto him.
Jeongguk halts his movements, but the jerk of his cock gives him away.
“Please, your omega needs you,” you plead, stretching your neck to reveal the tempting expanse of your neck.
“Baby, we should talk about this-
“No, please, I’ve thought about this for a long time now, I’m ready,” you reassured.
“O-okay,” Jeongguk finally agrees, his alpha growling in agreement.
Jeongguk continues on with shallow thrusts while he rubs your clit in quick circles when he finally bites down on your neck, sealing the two of you together, and you would’ve never imagined this feeling.
The feeling of a weight lifted off, your omega that used to feel so restless, now being a part of you and your alpha.
Jeongguk quickly laps up the wound, easing the healing process before he pulls you sideways, wrapping his arms around your figure.
You curl up next to him seamlessly, sighing in contentment.
“When we’re done eating the brownies and your heat strikes again, you have to promise to give me my mating mark too,” Jeongguk says with a slight whine to his voice, the alpha image dissolving right before your eyes.
You weren’t surprised he asked for his own mating mark, the last time you guys discussed about mating marks, he had insisted on you marking him.
“I promise, now hurry up and deflate your knot or my brownies are really going to burn,” you say with a huff.
“Hush, there’s still 9 minutes left, we can just waddle to the oven together,” Jeongguk teases, which earns him a playful slap on his butt that’s conveniently within reach.
You definitely won’t regret being Jeongguk’s mate.
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sourjinss · 5 months ago
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⁀➷ ‎‎YOU STAY ON MY MIND
➼ CHAPTER ONE ⋆ a happy coincidence ⋆ PREVIOUS CHAPTER
➼ PARING ⋆ tattooartist!taehyung! + bartender!fem!reader
➼ PRÉCIS ⋆  after a rough patch in your relationship you and your boyfriend are finally on solid ground but that all goes to hell when his older brother, taehyung comes to visit.
➼ CAUTION! ⋆ cheating sexual themes verbal abuse toxic relations this is pure fiction does not relate to any idol physical altercations fluffy and sweet (yay) angst (boo) slow burn?? side jungkoook story?
APPLE!! - i feel like the first chapter is always hard to do i hope you guys like it though! it took me while and the writing might be ass (mybadd) but heart it and reblog if you do enjoy !! xoxo
PLAY THIS ⋆ come here by dominic fike , talk 2 you by brent faiyaz
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TAEHYUNG had an easy life; he would tell you that himself. but his appearance could tell a different story for anyone who was small-minded.
he could feel the stares from miles away a man around his age who expression spoke envy because his seat partner was too close to drooling on her rather conservative skirt, lust written all over her face.
an older woman, who was disgusted with just being in the same space as him, her daughter had looked at him with admiration despite his tattoos and his many piercings.
he offered her a small smile and looked back out the plane window, he liked a routine he put precision in anything that he deemed worthy.
making a trip to his hometown was not in his plans, not that he was complaining he wanted to see how his little brother was doing but in saying that led him where he is now, trying to find as much peace as he could with his seatmate, jeongguk snoring obnoxiously his thin lips parted like the clouds that they flew by. 
taehyung didn't know why jeongguk was so set on following him, without taehyung at the tattoo parlor he could finally act on his crazy ideas. 
he chose not to think about too much jeongguk was already tired of being nagged by the elder.
mingyu, his little brother suddenly came to mind he was much like his apprentice. “kook” taehyung whispered as he reached over and gently shook him on the shoulder
jeongguk ignored him and turned his head the other way his voice coming out slurred and groggy “is the plane going down?” taehyung smirked and shook his head looking at the people passing them both to board off “well fuck off” “m’kay” taehyung leaped up out of his seat happily and grabbed his suitcase, leaving the stubborn kid by himself after a minute he had realized and cursed at taehyung under his breath, running to catch up with him.  
“bitch what?!” 
 noelani looked as if you had a red ball on your nose and a rainbow wig on. “there’s no way you took his bum-ass back” feeling the heavy embarrassment creep up on you like a bad cold you turned around bringing your focus back on the glass you were previously cleaning.
but you knew your best-friend wasn’t having none of that “yn honey are you serious?” “i know you don't have to rub the shit in..” you sighed turning back to meet her ridiculous stare
“what?” she blinked as if she was thinking about the next words to come out her mouth, which you knew she wasn't “is the dick that good?” she said loudly, inside voice never being considered. glaring at her you snatched her glass of liquor “first of all, that’s enough for you”
it was near closing time, there was a few people in the bar and you was almost done with your nightly duties noelani was drunk and you took that opportunity to tell her what had happened with mingyu, praying that she wouldn’t remember the next day if she were sober she would've taken the initiative and attacked mingyu in the  back of your head you kind of wished that she did. you wished of a lot of things lately  
“okay the only logical reason is that you're with child and he's the baby-daddy” noelani suggested, blowing a tight curl off her forehead, chin rested calmly in her palm “i’m not pregnant..i just forgave him” those words felt nasty coming out your mouth
“what- why do you think what he did to you was worth forgiving yn?” she crossed her arms, swaying gently  
you paused, your mouth ajar and before you could answer the bell on the door rung, the cold air being pushed in. two men sauntered inside “fuck its freezing” one of them seethed, combing their fingers through their jet-black hair he was taller than the other, he dressed in all-black attire his hands covered in tattoos, a ring hanging from the corner of his mouth.  the other was somewhat similar, dark attire, hands covered in ink, but he had honey blonde hair his appearance to you seemed gentler in a way “your dumbass wanted to drink in the middle of the night”  
“you didn’t have to come” in response to that the honey blonde smacked the back of the others head “who the fuck was going to drive your sorry ass home?” he looked around and his dark eyes reached yours and stayed that's when you realized that you were staring at them both quickly you averted your gaze but his eyes stayed on you.
“is that like a turn on of yours or something?” jeongguk mumbled pinching his brows together while they walked to the bar taehyung nodded mindlessly his eyes still perched on your silhouette jeongguk followed his eyes
“dude..am i tweakin' or are you eye-fucking someone” with that taehyung finally removed his eyes
“what are you talking about?” he deadpanned and rolled his eyes “whatever makes your monkey jump..” jeongguk snickered and went back to his phone right when taehyung was about to cuss him out you walked over.
standing in front of them making both of them pause in their tracks to look at you “uhm hi what can i get for you..guys?” either of them uttered a word and it was making you feel extremely awkward pursing your lips tightly you provided a small smile “ill come back later”  
“no that’s okay we’re ready” jeongukk vocalized smiling back “can i get a blueberry daiquiri but frozen please”  
you weren’t expecting such a fruity drink from him you thought as you turn around to face the other “and you?”  taehyung’s hands felt sweaty it was freaking him the fuck out
“i’m actually not drinking tonight” you smiled at him and tilted your head “next time then” when you turned around to make jeongguks order he slapped taehyung on his arm and shook him excitedly taehyung pushed him off him but was secretly geeked out because what did you mean by next time “so how long are you two staying in town?”  
taehyung was feeling himself “how do you know we aren’t from here?” he smiled pulling his sleeves up to lean his forearms on the bar staring at your back his eyes trailing down to your ass, which was doing those jeans a favor
“well are you from here?”
that’s when you turned around to face him “i am my friend here isn’t-“ taehyung stuttered, causing jeongguk to laugh beside him, slapping his thigh and sipping on the drink you served him
“what brings you guys here?” wiping his mouth with the back of his hand he grins, hitting taehyung on the back “taehyung here is visiting his baby brother and helping out a fellow artist in the area and i’m here for the ride”  
“jeongguk here is the tattoo’s shop receptionist back where we live and he had nothing better to do so he tagged along.” taehyung interjected straight-faced
jeongguk ‘s knowing smile deflated and went back to his drink dejectedly. you laughed and nodded, putting the drinks back in destinated places taehyung found himself wondering if that laugh was genuine and if the smile you shown was real   
“i figure you two were artist”  
“oh you’re an artist?” jeongguk interviewed in which you shook your head quite flustered “oh no no i only have like one tattoo”
taehyung wanted to know where it was how big it was, how’d it looks on your skin, what it felt like to trace it with his fingers. “i’m close to some artists” that came out like a question out of your mouth.
“really? name some we might know them” 
you were about to tell them about mingyu’s work, in the past you had boasted about how hard he works to create art and bring into life, but something stopped you “there's my friend, noelani she's super talented”  
as if she was summoned noelani somehow managed to stand on her own and came over “yn i’m going to head to the crib” she slurred but tried to give the impression that she was dead sober
“yeah, no” you said as you grabbed your bag everyone but them had left.
 one thing you knew about her is she was really good at fronting, pretending be someone who had their shit together, noelani was one of artist you are close with she is a taller woman with dark red hair tanned skin incorporating many fine line tattoos, color etched in each one she was a few years older than you and both of you were roommates in college and since been inseparable. 
“i am not even drunk-” she leaned her hip on the stool and turned to look at jeongguk who was drinking quietly
“what are you looking at?”
his doe eyes widened and blinked you covered your face with both of your hands and groaned internally “ignore her please”
you sighed while untying your black apron and walking over to your friend, wrapping your arm around her waist
“we’re actually about to close.”
“shit- sorry” taehyung said as he stood up burning a hole in jeongguk’s head who was still in his spot, ignoring taehyung he turned to you and pulled out his wallet “how much do i owe you”  
“don’t worry about it, hope you two enjoy your stay!” you smiled tightly struggling moderately to hold a drunk noelani up jeongguk bit his lip
“can i at least help with your friend?”
  you looked between them “and how do i know you two aren’t like perverts or something?” noelani all of sudden stood up straight and squinted “the tall one is someone i’d still be with if he dogged me out” noelani spilled before going limp into your arms once more 
a-beat passed and you kind of wished you died a quick death right there jeongguk smiled awkwardly and taehyung stared at you in disbelief a look in his eyes you couldn’t read
you looked at jeongguk and carefully offered your friend “i have a gun” you lied swiftly as jeongguk gently carried noelani on his back and in response she rested her head on his shoulder, he blushed profusely.
you and taehyung were left alone behind the duo 
“if me and my friend make it out alive tonight, i truly hope you and him have a nice stay” you humored.
taehyung looked at you and grinned his lips stretched into a boxy shape
you thought it was cute
“i promise we have no intention to do such a thing” you nodded and shyly tucked a stray hair from your ponytail behind your ear, you were both walking slow and it was nice, talking to him was pleasant “how long have you been a tattoo artist?” 
taehyung stuffed his hands into the red leather jacket that hugged his frame and hummed as he pondered
“about five years or so?”  jeongguk and noelani had probably reached the vehicles but he couldn’t find a reason to care.
“how long have you been bartending?” “for 8 years or so..” you looked at his coated arms shamelessly and it was like each piece stuck to his skin perfectly
“it was my mother’s bar; she would haunt me if i let it to waste” you kicked a small rock and smiled to yourself an apologetic expression flashed over his face "way to ruin the mood y/n you thought" and quickly raise your hands  
“i’m fine it was years ago”   
taehyung looked back at the bar, his dark eyes shining with adornment “she would be so proud of you y/n”  
a lot of people said that to and you never really knew if what they said was truthful, taehyung made it seem almost believable.  
Before taehyung could see how thrown off you were by his statement jeongguk yelled from where he was “if you two don’t hurry your asses up!”  
you brushed off the feeling that settled in your stomach and quickly opened the back door to your car helping jeongguk put her in looking at him strangely when he put his coat over her torso.  
taehyung raised a brow and looked at him skeptically.  
jeongguk only shrugged and rubbed the back of his neck “what? she said she was cold” he then circled around and got into the car him and taehyung rode in 
with that you and taehyung was left by yourselves and to be truthful taehyung wasn’t rushing to leave you for some unknown reason you were incredibly interesting to him; the way your hair flowed with the cold breeze, how your arm flexed slightly when you wrapped it around your friend's waist it all drew him in, and that made him anxious hell you made him blush for fuck sakes.  
“so um i guess ill see you guys around?” you say with a sweet smile planted on your lips, taehyung only nodded and licked his lips silently.
you turned your back on him but before you could climb in and drive off taehyung stopped you by gently grabbing your wrist.  
“if you want anything done— tattoo wise please come by, i'm down the street from where your bar is” he suggested shyly and took his hand off your (he noted) much smaller wrist.  
you grinned and climbed into your car taehyung closing the door for you. “that’s nice of you, stranger” he shared the simper and leaned down to your window, his face dangerously close to yours “i have to repay the kindness you showed my apprentice”  
“maybe ill use the favor soon, maybe not” you teased lowkey getting into the little moment you both were having
“i would hope so, i hate leavin’ debts neglected”  
“it was just a drink-” you started  
“i know just lemme repay the favor, ma” he sent his award-winning smile before leaning back up and hitting the top of your car
“drive safe its ice on the road” he offered before going back to his own car, which was much nicer than yours.  
but he never drove off, it took you a minute to realize that he was indeed was waiting for you to leave and that made you smile a little bit and while you drove off you waved a hand out the window. 
jeongguk looked at him and shook his head “I know you fucking lyin”  
taehyung rolled his eyes and drove out the parking lot “what are you talking about?”  
“flirted her head off dude knowing damn well she got a man” he stated and looked at taehyung like he had sticky note on his forehead that said ‘biggest dick walking here!’
“she got a boy and he don’t even deserve all that” taehyung knew what he was doing was morally wrong, but it felt right and- hold up
“didn’t you give her homegirl your jacket?” jeongguk suddenly was very interested in the amazing city lights that flew by “how you think yoongi’s shops doing?" 
taehyung chuckled and reached over to pinch his cheek “nah nah nah playboy you did that smooth as hell, now she gotta see your dumbass again”
 jeongguk grumbled, a warm blush creeping up his neck “if that’s how you flirt i feel bad for her” 
he couldn’t stop thinking about you, about your body filled out perfectly in your work outfit he couldn't stop wondering where that tattoo of yours laid, if it was done on a drunken night or were you feeling frisky due to boredom, he wanted study it like he was testing for his license again and he hoped to see you again, even a glance will do..
"this is bad" he notioned the smile quickly being wiped off his face
you chose not drive noelani home instead you took her to your place, your house was your family home you grew up in it, it was left to you by your late mother she knew how much it meant to you.  
after a failed call with mingyu and about all your dying strength you got noelani situated in one of the guest rooms, knowing she was going to hot in the middle of the night you took off her clothes and tucked her in, not forgetting to put a bucket with a trash bag by her side and water on the stand.  
closing the door you practically dragged yourself to your bedroom, opening to see mingyu sleeping peacefully in your bed, in your room. the same room he fucked another bitch in, the same room you grew up in.  
you heaved a heavy sigh and silently got a tee-shirt and closed the door gently
walking back to where noelani remained and threw off your soiled clothes, residing in nothing but a tee-shirt and your panties, climbing into bed with her and resting your face in the hollow of her back
the last thought crossing your tired mind is how taehyung called you ‘ma’ causing you to sleep with a small smile  
the next morning you awakened by the sound of your annoying ass alarm, waking noelani up too, “ow ow ow” she winced holding her head with her hands, “fucking hell-” she moaned as she got out of bed and rushed to bathroom which you presumed to throw up and shit. 
the winter sun shined heavily into the room, and you founded it irritating, the past few weeks you found a lot of things irritating.   
getting out of bed reluctantly, the scent of eggs and bacon forced itself into your nose  
did mingyu really took the initiative to make you breakfast?  
“mingyu?” you called before walking around the corner, yawning and stretching your arms above your head only to bump into a broad chest.
“fuck my nose-” you whined, now you were not a morning person at all, and you were seconds away from cussing mingyu's ass out for not watching where the fuck he was going  
little problem though, you looked up it wasn’t mingyu it was taehyung like the guy who charmed you last night like the same guy with the pretty works of art on his body and even a prettier smile.  
you both stared at each other in utter shock, and you swore he could your heart beating out your chest.  
noelani came out the bathroom and rubbed her eyes, pausing a few steps away from you both announcing what was going through both of your heads  
“what in the absolute fuck is goin’ on?” 
-
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mangowillow · 1 year ago
Text
last to know | ch. 1: haunted dreams
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pairing: jungkook x (f) reader / kim woosung x (f) reader
summary: you and jeongguk got together at 16 years old, married at 20, and divorced at 21. what was once love ever after turned into nothing but pain and unfulfilled dreams. you keep going despite the pain in your heart that never really went away, until one day, jungkook comes back— to seoul and in your life.
general story tags: divorce au, childhood friends, angst (who am i without it), hurt & eventual comfort, kind of a slow burn, OC is an adopted child in this fic, a lot of flashbacks later on because context is important; and the others that a lot of people seem to dislike: a love triangle and a LOT of miscommunication. look away if this isn't your thing. tags and warnings will be updated as we go along with each chapter!
warnings: nothing really; well, maybe except seokjin's intrusive thoughts about an axe k*ller— but it's tame, i promise! oh, and jeongguk gets slapped. be nice and let me know if i miss anything! there's a mini flashback in this chapter in all italics marked by a ♥!
word count: 3,900
author's note: i am very nervous about this first chapter because it's been A WHILE since i last wrote ~something~ so anyway! here you go, enjoy!
fic masterlist
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New York, 2023
It was right when the DJ turned up the volume that Jeongguk felt the impact of a palm hitting him square in the jaw.
Jeongguk doesn’t know what stimuli to focus on: should it be the loud music blasting through the speakers or the sting of the slap that he probably deserved. It doesn’t take his brain too long to piece together what just happened 5 seconds ago. He knows what’s coming and he is also very much aware that he did see it coming sooner or later.
“Fuck you, Jeongguk,” Ae-cha grits through her teeth. Jeongguk swears she’s about to cry, tears threatening to spill amidst the blue glow of the lights above them. “We are dating, how can you say that—”
“We sleep together when it’s convenient for the both of us, Ae-cha.” Jeongguk downs the rest of his scotch, along with the remnants of his pride. “I never said anything about dating.”
“You are such a jerk!” Ae-cha turns a shade of red, tears in the corners of her eyes. It isn’t the first time Jeongguk has ever made a woman cry, but oddly enough, he doesn’t feel that hollow ache in his chest; the one he felt the first time he made that mistake. He should feel bad, he thinks, but then again, he also doesn’t.
Does that make him a bad person? 
“I didn’t listen to my friends when they said you were trouble. I wanted to prove them wrong—” Ae-cha starts, but Jeongguk cuts her off.
“Why? Why do you have to?”
Ae-cha’s eyes grow wide as she watches Jeongguk stare at his empty glass.
“You should have listened to your friends.” Jeongguk says, matter-of-fact. Ae-cha scoffs and Jeongguk knows now is the right time to probably shut up.
But he’s a jerk, just like Ae-cha says he was.
“I told you right from the beginning… we just use each other because we’re both lonely,” Jeongguk feels his throat turn dry, “I think somewhere along the way, you misread my actions.”
Ae-cha doesn’t move, doesn’t speak. She closes her eyes for a minute and Jeongguk looks at her, waiting for her rebuttal. Or maybe a second slap. Whichever comes first.
Ae-cha speaks in a voice so low, it’s perplexing how Jeongguk is still able to pick up her words— “Your problem is that you do not care about other people’s feelings, Jeongguk. You only care about your own.”
Jeongguk tightens his jaw; now he feels his heart aching.
“You hurt people. You ruin good things. You keep your heart under tight wraps and you do not let anyone in. If you keep that up, you will end up with no one.”
Jeongguk stares at Ae-cha, wanting to say something, but failing completely. Maybe this is what he gets for sleeping with a psychologist— a rude awakening.
Before he can say anything, Ae-cha turns on her heel and walks away. Jeongguk remains at the bar for a bit more until the song changes into a slower tempo. It feels like a chore walking back to the table where his best friend Yoongi was— like walking on lead. 
“That must’ve hurt—” Yoongi starts, fingers reaching out to the peanut bowl and putting some into his mouth. Jeongguk plops down on the chair with a sigh. “What a shitty night,” he quips.
Yoongi hums, “And whose fault is that?” 
Jeongguk looks at his best friend in annoyance. Yoongi chuckles, putting more peanuts into his mouth. ���What’d she say?”
“That I’m a jerk who hurts people and ruins good things.”
“Is it true?”
“You tell me.”
“I don’t think I need to do that, kid.” Yoongi concludes, glancing at Jeongguk. He takes a swing out of his beer bottle before continuing, “You know damn well the answer to that.”
Jeongguk clicks his tongue and takes the beer from Yoongi. He takes a swig himself, letting their conversation die out by drowning it into the same old music he’s used to hearing almost every night. 
Jeongguk comes home to his apartment that night, tipsy and his heart in pieces. Walking into the living room, the corner of his eyes catch the stack of luggages already packed and loaded. He didn’t feel like sitting on the couch so he opts to sit on the floor, his fingers grazing the carpet absentmindedly. A beat later, he allows his heart to bleed once more— as he always seems to do every single night for the past few years. Leaning his head back against the edge of his couch, he cries himself to sleep, wishing, praying the ache in his chest—and the words you hurt people—would go away in the morning.
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Seoul, 2023
Your eyes try to take in the art in front of you— The Artist’s Garden in Giverny, Claude Monet, 1900. Usually, many emotions overwhelm your system and you cannot help but discuss any painting with the next person willing to listen. 
And once upon a time, you were enthusiastic about your craft and love for the arts. It was almost always too easy, too often that you could come up with pieces to add to your gallery. But that hasn’t happened in over a year— maybe more than. 
In the stillness of the room you are in, you hear light footsteps coming closer to where you are. You keep your eyes trained on Monet’s painting until your brother Seokjin sits beside you.
For a while, you and Seokjin just sit beside each other— no words, only a quiet understanding that close siblings seem to share and empathize with. Seokjin’s parents adopted you when you were eleven; a year after you and your parents met a horrible car collision. You are five months older than Seokin, yet that fact doesn't deter him at all, and more often than not, he usually ends up acting like your older brother. When he first met you at the orphanage, he grew fond of you real quick— already asking his parents when he’d be allowed to play with you. He doesn’t mind that you were once part of the system, that you are his half-sister— not really. He never treated you any differently. He loves you with his whole heart and he will always protect you. 
This is why he also cannot stand stillness at times, especially when it involves you.
“Have you been waiting long?” Seokjin asks.
You have a habit of kicking your right foot into the air when you don’t really know how to respond right away. You take a sharp inhale before shaking your head. Seokjin follows your line of sight— you were still looking at the painting.
“Does it make you feel better? Looking at this, I mean…” 
Seokjin’s question makes you look at him instead, like you just realized he had been sitting there this whole time and you never knew. He meets your eyes, sees the sadness in them. He will always know no matter how hard you try to hide it.
“Happy birthday, ____”
You don’t respond. 
“Taehyung and the others are waiting down at the cafe. Do you still want to meet them?”
You nod once before giving Seokjin a smile, “Of course.”
Seokjin slides into the gap between the two of you and instinctively, you rest your head on his shoulder as he envelops you in a side hug. He rubs a hand up and down your arm before planting a light kiss on top of your head.
“I know it doesn’t get any easier, ____. But I just want you to know that I love you… We all love you.” 
With shaky breath and tears that threaten to spill from your eyes, you whisper, “I know.”
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As Seokjin gets into the driver’s seat, you hand him an envelope. Seokjin has an inkling what it is, but he asks you anyway as he squints his eyes at you.
“What is that supposed to be?”
You push the envelope towards him a bit more, just humming, “It’s the last payment.”
Seokjin rolls his eyes as he presses the ignition. He doesn’t take the envelope, “Oh come on, Seokjin, just take it.”
“And for the nth time, you shouldn’t have to pay for something I willingly helped you out for. We’re siblings, for gods sake, ____.”
You lower your hands, setting the envelope on your lap. Eyes cast down you mumble, “I know that. I was able to sell a painting again after a long time and it felt good… But I already told you this before— I’d feel better if you just please take this.” 
Seokjin lets out a sigh— usually he makes that sound when he’s already defeated. 
“Please don’t tell me you’re giving me all the money you worked hard for,” Seokjin starts and you shake your head as soon as you heard the word all. “No, not at all, I— I had some saved up and the rest of it will be for rent.”
You look at Seokjin who still looks suspicious. You playfully roll your eyes and Seokjin sees you smile for the first time that night.
“I promise.”
Seokjin sets his eyes on the parking lot, placing his hands on the steering wheel, “Fine—” you squeal as soon as he gives in and you place the envelope in the glove compartment. “—but this is the last time, all right?”
“Yes sir, that’s the last of the payments,” you respond a tone higher than your usual. Seokjin chuckles as he sets the gear into reverse.
“Are you sure you don’t need any help moving some of your stuff?” Seokjin asks as you fasten your seatbelt.
“Not really, I think I can manage just fine.”
You expect Seokjin to be backing up the car right now, yet he remains unmoving. You chuckle.
“I’ll be fine, Seokjin. Movers will help me move some of the heavier stuff.”
“Listen, ____, I was beyond ecstatic when you told me you were moving out of… there. I just don’t understand why you need to move in somewhere else when you can just stay with me.”
“Seokjin—”
“And it’s not like you have any problems with money or anything, I mean, you are doing okay right?”
“I am,” you answer with a smirk.
“Yah, don’t give me that look, ____. I’m serious, I really don’t understand why you have to stay somewhere else.”
“I already told you. I don’t need a big apartment, I just need a place to sleep. And isn’t it weird if we live together— people are going to think we’re co-dependent.”
Seokjin opens his mouth to argue, but you cut him off, “And I know what you’re going to ask next. Why did I choose to move in an apartment on the other side of the city? And I already told you a dozen times— I need to learn how to be on my own for real this time. And it’s much cheaper compared to all the other apartments in the city center, I mean— have you seen Seoul?”
“Don’t get cheeky with me, woman. Sure yeah, valid, but have you met your neighbors?”
“What does that have to do with anything?” you ask confidently.
“Well, they could be an ax killer or something—”
“Or they could just be an ordinary person with a normal life, Seokjin.” You laugh at your brother’s catastrophic thoughts. You completely understand where he’s coming from— he just wants to protect you.
“That’s only hypothetical,” Seokjin snarks as he stops at a stoplight. You lay your hand on top of his on the console.
“I know you’re worried about me—”
“I am, you brat.”
“And I will forever be grateful… but I need to do this,” you reply calmly, almost like you were whispering. “I hope you understand.”
“I’m trying, ____. It’s not exactly easy to do that when you’re not giving me the grace to understand exactly why you need to do this… when you can just stay with me. The house is too big. And the cafe is right next door!”
“And we will get to that someday… but not right now, hm?” Seokjin sighs in defeat. “I will call you every single night if that will make you feel better.”
“Yah, those kinds of things have to come from the heart, not because you’re forced to do it just to appease me.”
“I’m not… I actually really want to talk to my little brother every day,” you tease as Seokjin scoffs.
“Fine, you have to call me every day, okay? Promise?”
You grin wide, “I promise.”
“And I am not your little brother, we’re only 5 months apart.”
“Doesn’t change the fact that I’m older than you.”
Seokjin grumbles under his breath but a smirk was on his lips, “And you’re always going to be my brat.”
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The coffee shop you and Seokjin run together has been passed down by your parents. Ever since Seokjin could utter the word, “coffee,” everyone in the family knew he was destined to manage the coffee chains. Even though you were technically the older one, your parents were more lenient and allowed you to forge your own path. Seokjin understood that and he wouldn’t have it any other way despite your pleas to help him with all the major business work. It has been a few years since the original coffee shop in Seongsu-dong expanded into different branches across Seoul. When you flew back from New York, you immediately put up your own artist studio right beside the cafe. Seokjin even pitched in on the idea of a gallery where people can choose to paint while drinking their favorite latte. Four years later, people now come for the art displays and occasional indie music performances, at times poetry nights. 
Four years later, you were also making a name for yourself as an artist. Seokjin once told you you were a jack of all trades, master of everything because you were crafty with your hands— painting, dress-making, cooking. And you brush him off every single time.
Because if anything, one of your greatest weaknesses was believing whether or not you were good enough for anything or anyone.
Seokjin opens the door for you as you both enter the coffee shop. As soon as you come in, you are greeted by your long-time friends— Taehyung, Hoseok, and Jimin. You met Taehyung and Jimin in New York because you were all fine arts students. Hoseok came into the picture as Taehyung’s lover not long after the three of you came back home to Seoul. 
“There she is, our little star,” Taehyung greets you with his signature boxy smile. His arms are wide open, ready to engulf you in a tight embrace. Jimin and Hoseok follow suit, each with a kiss on the cheek.
“It’s about time you show your pretty face, ____. It’s been ages since we last saw you,” Jimin quips.
“But I text and call you guys almost every day,” you defend. Hoseok pushes a plate of strawberry cake towards you and adds, “It’s not the same as seeing you in the flesh, ____. You look amazing, as always.”
“Thank you, Hobi. That’s reassuring, considering the fact that I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in ages.”
“Too many commissions?” Jimin asks.
“More than that, the gallery show at Seojung Art is in six months, and I still haven’t started on my piece.”
“Do you already know what you’re going to create?” Taehyung asks as he takes a bite of his croissant.
“That’s the problem… inspiration isn’t coming. It’s a bother,” a frown now evident across your face. Jimin holds your hand.
“You know you’re really talented, right, ____? You’ll pull through.”
“Thanks, Jiminie,” you smile at him. 
“Maybe one of the customers’ paintings here could ignite a spark?” Taehyung starts. “I mean, sometimes the best kind of inspiration hits when you least expect it.”
“You’re right. I’ll sleep on it tonight… if I do get to sleep,” you chuckle, but they all know it’s more than that.
Seokjin comes back to the table with your hot mint tea— a drink that almost always helps you fall asleep.
“What’s with the dead atmosphere, guys? It’s been a while since we all got together like this and you’re all moping,” Seokjin jokes. He has always been the life of the party contrary to his very introverted nature.
“It really is a good night, isn’t it?” Taehyung replies as he eats up the last bit of his pastry. “Hoseok and I actually enjoyed the night breeze on the way here because it was just the right amount of chilly.”
“Always the romantic, this one,” Hoseok laughs.
Jimin carefully watches you as you sip your tea in silence. “Are you all settled to move in tomorrow, ____? Do you need help?” 
“I’ll be fine, Jimin. I don't have as much stuff to pack, anyway.”
“Oh yeah that’s right, tomorrow’s moving day. Are you excited?” Taehyung jumps a bit on his seat, suddenly interested in the conversation.
“Not really, I mean, it’s going to be pretty boring moving stuff around, don’t you think?”
“But it’s also the start of a new beginning.” Taehyung supplies.
You smile after taking a bite of the cake, “That is very true.”
Seokjin opens his mouth to talk, but then closes it. He changes his mind anyway, “Her neighbors don’t own axes or something, right Taehyung?”
Taehyung giggles, “I don’t know, hyung, It’s not like I went into every apartment on her floor.”
Seokjin turns pale and Taehyung laughs. Taehyung used to live on the same floor as the one you’re about to move into— before he moved in with Hoseok.
“Seokjin is so worried about the neightbors that he couldn’t stop ranting about it on the way here,” you chuckle. “But as I told him, I’ll be fine.” You placed emphasis on the word fine as you held Seokjin’s hand for reassurance under the table.
“Are you telling that to us or to yourself?” Seokjin starts. He has a way of being so upfront with you that there were moments when it became the cause of your fights and misunderstandings. Seokjin sometimes does not know when to stop, yet you know he always means well. You love and dislike him for it at the same time.
“Hyung…” Jimin readily interjects.
“It’s okay, Jimin…” you put your fork down and paused before looking at Seokjin. “I am telling all of you and myself… that I will be fine. I am honestly really thankful that you’re all here now to keep me company.”
You’ve been saying the word “fine” and “okay” a whole lot that night— you started to doubt if you really are or if Seokjin was right— that you’re just trying to convince yourself of it.
“Are you holding up okay, noona?” Hoseok asks, worried.
“Of course—” you take a sharp exhale before continuing, “It also means that time is helping me get past it. And I am okay with that.”
None of your friends respond. 
“We love you always, ____. You’ll always have us.” Taehyung said.
“Happy birthday, noona,” Jimin smiles. 
Your friends sing you their greetings as Hoseok brings out their surprise birthday cake and flowers. As you try not to cry at their gesture, you try to give them the most genuine smile you can muster. Yet in your heart, you know it’s not enough to convince them. Or yourself.
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♥ “You do not get to tell me shit because I have done everything for you—”
“I didn’t ask for any of this, Jeongguk—”
“And yet you still came here with me. If you are really that resentful about moving here… about marrying me— then why did you stay? Why are you still here?”
“I never said I resented you.”
“Yeah? Well it feels like it. You make me feel like shit whenever I can’t help you! God I— you know what? I’m done. I can’t do this with you anymore.”
“W-what do you mean you can’t—”
“—I’m saying we should end this. I want a divorce.”
Yoongi gently shakes Jeongguk’s shoulder to wake him up. “We’re almost landing, Jeongguk-ah,” he whispers.
Jeongguk slightly jerks from his sleep. His body feels heavy, his brain foggy but at the same time trying to recover from the dream he just had.
“It’s the same dream again, isn’t it?” Yoongi asks, knuckles turning white as he holds on to the arm rests. Turbulence has always been a bitch— well, at least to Yoongi. Jeongguk doesn’t answer him; instead, he looks out the plane window, thinking the plane couldn’t land fast enough.
“You keep calling out for her, you know? When you dream, I mean. Did you know that?”
That gets Jeongguk’s attention. He bites down on his lip ring before shaking his head, “No. I didn’t know.”
From baggage claim until Jeongguk and Yoongi exit through arrivals, there has been nothing but silence. Yoongi notices how Jeongguk’s hands couldn’t keep still: he’d take them in and out of his pockets. As they walk to the car that awaits them, Yoongi asks once more— “Are you sure you’re going to be okay?
Jeongguk lets out a long breath before looking at his best friend: “I will be.”
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“This is the last of the boxes, ma’am.” One of the movers holds a medium-sized box. “Where do you want me to put it?”
You get up from one of the boxes you were opening, “Oh, that’s okay, I’ll take it. Thank you.”
“I just need you to sign one more thing before we wrap up.”
“Of course,” you take the pen and sign on the dotted line.
“Have a good day,” The movers gave you a small bow before they went on their way. Looking around the room, you let out a sigh. The apartment is bigger than you initially thought but you are happy about that. There’s an extra room spacious enough to set up a painting studio. 
Your eyes land on the last box that was given to you by the mover. Inside it are memories that you don’t feel ready to touch just yet. Despite everything else scattered around your room, you pick up the box and shove it into the back corner of your closet. Maybe someday you’ll have the heart to open it again, but right now, it stays out of sight.
You were about to start opening one of the other boxes when a soft, melodic voice comes up behind you— “Hey baby.”
You turn around quickly, your heart and body naturally gravitating to the owner of the voice: Kim Woosung, your boyfriend.
“Hi,” you softly respond, heart happy upon seeing your boyfriend’s smile. He sets the take-out bags down to hug you. Woosung then gives you a long kiss on your forehead, mumbling, “I missed you.”
You don’t lift your eyes to meet his right away, but your hands reach out for his as he cradles your face. When you finally look at him, he gives you that warm smile you have always loved. With Woosung, there is peace, the kind that secures your heart. As he aligns his forehead with yours, you feel all your worries melt away. 
With Woosung, everything feels safe, so right.
“I’m sorry I’m late,” Woosung apologizes. You shake your head gently and wrap your arms around his neck.
“You’re just in time.”
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untaemedqueen · 1 year ago
Text
At Your Service
Escort!Jeongguk x CEO!Reader
Genre: Strangers to Lovers!AU, Angst, Fluff, Smut
Chapter 15.
Series Warnings (Will Be Updated): Angst, Fluff, Cold Heartedness, Emotional Trauma, Healing, Smut, Dark Humor
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"I fucking knew something like this was gonna happen again!" Taehyung hisses venomously as both he and Jimin stare down at Guk who hasn't gotten off the couch all day.
"Tae…" Chim murmurs softly, nudging him the ribs.
The escort's cheeks are stained with tears and his eyes are bloodshot with red rims signifying the lack of sleep he's gotten for the past few days.
"No! Look at him! I knew this shit was gonna happen! He looks like he's been fucking shot!" the tallest shouts, knocking Jimin's hand away.
"I know it seems bad right now but maybe they can patch it up, you k-"
"Are you fucking kidding me, man? You got wrapped up in her little play too, huh?! That bitch-"
Within a second Jeongguk is off the couch and gripping the neck of the older man's shirt with eyes that come alive with fierceness and molten anger. "Watch what you fucking say about her in my house!"
Chim takes a step back, blinking at how fast the youngest moved.
Taehyung isn't afraid of the confrontation, his smirk is almost bitter and sad for the man before him.
"I want to say I told you so badly. You have no idea," he mumbles, wrapping his hand around the escort's fist.
"Get the fuck outta my house," Jeongguk hisses, shoving Tae back with a force that makes his heels dig into the carpet below before laying back down on the couch to stare off into space some more.
"I bet you would even get back with her if she asked you too! You have no backbone, Guk! You don't even understand how absolutely wrong she is for this!"
The tallest is right in that sense, if you just called Guk or texted him he would go running to you wherever you are. Somehow your ex-boyfriend feels as if this isn't real.
You wouldn't push him away like this, you wouldn't leave him alone without any explanation if you weren't frightened. The doctor must have told you something awful. Maybe you can't face reality, yet. Or maybe you don't want to face it because then whatever it is might become real.
"What're you gonna do, Gukkie? You can't stay in this apartment forever staring at your phone," Jimin asks with a soft, soothing voice.
The escort continues to stare at his coffee table and simply shrugs when Chim crouches before him making eye contact.
"God, I can't believe the women you pick," Tae guffaws, folding his arms once more.
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Jeongguk feels like a mere shell at this point, every step he takes feels like he's crawling farther and farther away from you.
He can barely even think anymore, his thoughts are always solely on you. When they're not on you, he thinks about what he's done wrong.
It's been two weeks since you blocked him from you. Everyday feels like it's longer than the last.
He wishes he would have told you how much he loves you instead of whispering it in the dead of night while you slept. Maybe if he told you how much you mean to him, you would have been brave enough to not push him away. Jimin constantly tells him to stop dwelling on it but it seems almost impossible.
"You have a job," Jimin announces, busting through the apartment door.
"What?" the escort hisses, lifting his head lazily off of the couch.
"You have a job," his best friend enunciates, throwing a pair of black jeans that are piled up on the floor at his head.
If you were to see the state of your ex-boyfriend's apartment right now, you would drop dead. It's quite simply a mess.
"I didn't take a job. So no, I don't," Guk hisses, tossing the jeans off of his thigh with a rough hand.
"Applehyme wants you and only you. And me being the great guy I am told her that you'd do it so here we are. Now get dressed, you gotta be there in thirty minutes."
The escort lets his eyes flutter closed and he can't think of anything else but wanting his couch to swallow him whole. Even Hawking is staring at him with curious, sad eyes and it rips through his limbs like butter.
Applehyme only goes to one restaurant and as annoying and crude as she is… Namjoon also goes to that restaurant to get you food.
Maybe if Guk goes, he'll see your coworker. And if he sees your coworker, he can hound him to fess up what's going on with you.
As all of this works itself out in his brain, he stands up in a flash.
"Thirty minutes?" he inquires, heading off to the bathroom.
"Thirty," Chim agrees, throwing himself down on the couch.
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Jeongguk finds these restaurants way too dim. It's almost as if everyone is sticking to the shadows around him while he sits at a brightly lit table with older women swarming him like some kind of plague.
He has to squint just to see ten feet from the table but the prospect of seeing Namjoon is too hard to miss.
He takes the thigh touching with a grain of salt. Miranda Applehyme seems to never keep her hands to herself but when she's paying such an exorbitant amount to do it… he never complained.
"You've missed a few of our luncheons, Jeongguk. We were wondering when we would see you again," one of the fellowship announces.
The escort has never paid attention to any of these women's names and he's not about to start now.
"Oh… Yeah," he breathes, sitting up straighter when the doors open, "I've been busy."
These women are very bad at understanding social cues, especially when they feel like they're above everyone else. They don't understand that Guk couldn't give a bigger fuck and they really can't understand that he isn't paying a lick of attention.
Your ex physically deflates when the person that enters isn't Namjoon and he shakes his head minutely at the disappointment of it all.
It was a small chance to see him and an even smaller chance to get him to talk but he had to take it.
He needs to understand what's going on.
With a sigh, he turns his attention back to his now cold plate of food and he pushes the chicken around with his fork like a child.
"Are you alright?" Miranda inquires, pushing her bangs softly away from her eyes.
"Yeah… I'm fine," he whispers, giving her a polite smile.
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The afternoon with the mothball fellowship felt longer than most days and when it's finally over the escort takes a large relieving breath.
He holds open the car door for Miranda as she climbs into her Bentley and with a sullen smile, he politely nods to her.
It isn't even two seconds later when a nice, posh car rolls into the lot and as Mrs. Applehyme opens her mouth to speak, Guk slams the door shut.
Namjoon slowly makes his way out of his car in a nicely pressed three piece suit and your ex practically fumbles his own feet as he advances at your coworker.
"Oh God," Joon whines, catching sight of the man before him.
"Explain!" Guk snaps, grabbing at the lapels of his suit.
Jeongguk isn't the only one with muscle and within a second your coworker barrels towards hjm and shoves him up against the side of the restaurant with narrowed eyes.
"Listen to me, she does not want to see you. Do you understand me? She does not want to speak to you. Leave her alone."
The words are like bullets to your ex and he seemingly slumps, almost limply, within Namjoon's grasp. When your coworker promised he'd get to the bottom of this. Guk stupidly assumed the taller blonde man would just fix everything but that's clearly not the case.
Joon pulls away sharply, fixing his suit with a huff.
"Well… wh-what's wrong with her?" Guk inquires softly, running his hands over his face.
Your coworker sighs loudly, having to look away from the man he's broken with such few words. He wants to tell him so badly but… he promised you. "She's not dying, I can tell you that much."
The escort's eyes flutter shut and Joon takes a step away to look at your ex in his entirety. He's fucking messy, although he's masking it well, the bags under his eyes tell it all.
Joon has loved you for so many years, longer than this fucking guy but he's not the one you need right now. He knows that.
You find very little comfort in his presence and you don't speak to him or anyone to try and shut the world away.
"Let's get a drink, c'mon," Namjoon sighs, heading toward the restaurant and pocketing his hands.
"A drink?!" the escort guffaws, widening his eyes as he watches the blonde man walk away.
"That's what I explicitly said. Yes."
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The restaurant's bar is posh and completely filled with well off business men that have little care for anything in the entire world.
With a sigh, Guk picks up his whisky and watches as Namjoon rolls up his sleeves. The expression on the blonde man's face is one of exhaustion.
Huffing out, your coworker leans back into his chair with a groan.
"Y/N has been working so hard the past few days that it's running everyone else into the ground,"Joon announces, lifting his glass of wine.
Just to hear the way the man speaks your name, to see the adoration through his tired mocha irises makes Guk want to spit on the ground.
The blonde man notices the tension and anger in an instant but all he does is simply cross his legs confidently.
"I've know Y/N for a long fucking time. So long that… it sometimes feels like I've known her forever," Namjoon whispers, looking down into his glass. He doesn't know what he's going to say but he needs to say something.
The escort leans back into his chair, nursing the whiskey as he keeps his eyes on the older man.
"When I first met her… I grew a crush on her immediately. She was mean and vicious but she did it with poise and flare. I've been in love with her for years and she's never given me the time of day… But when you came along it was almost like it didn't even take you a week for her whole personality to change. Then I realized… I was never right for her. She looks at me like I'm some sort of background character and I'll never actually have a chance with her. I could try for seven more years and she'll never reciprocate because she doesn't care for me. I don't know if she would even call me a friend after all this time."
Guk simply watches Joon's inner monologue bleed forth from his lips like he's been dying to say this for ages.
Your coworker combs his fingers through his hair, completely at odds with what to do next. He's taking a lot on his shoulders and he's not even your significant other.
It's almost parasocial in a way.
Guk sighs softly, letting the burn of the whisky soothe his nerves.
What are you going through?
"Does she hate me? Why is she doing this?" your ex inquires hopelessly.
With a frown, Namjoon guzzles down the expensive wine. He shakes his head slowly as if he's trying to figure out exactly what he wants to do and say.
"I can't help her like you can. She doesn't… I'm not the one that she needs," your coworker breathes.
"So what're you saying?" the escort inquires, setting down his now empty glass.
"My car has black out windows so if you sit in the backseat then when I pull up to her gates the guards won't see you," Joon announces, setting his glass down and standing up.
"What?" Guk breathes, tilting his head.
"Just be quiet and follow me," the older man mumbles, rolling his eyes, "she's gonna fucking kill me, man."
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<;- Last Chapter -> Next Chapter
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jeonbunnie · 1 year ago
Note
just finished crying my eyes out to love is gone & why do i lowkey want oc to have a major glow up, run into jungkook months later & him realizing he made the biggest mistake of his life like i want him to grovel so bad for her just so he feels a little bit of what she felt … omg 😭
I can totally see it 😌
He runs into you six months later, and the realization hits him like a truck. He fucked up.
You're out with your friends sitting at the bar, looking hot as fuck in tight little number he'd love to peel off you if your were still his. But you're not. And the only person he has to blame for that is him.
And maybe he's had a few drinks, but all he can think about is how pretty you look. Your skin is glowing, and your smile is brighter than he's ever seen, radiant like the sun. Suddenly, it hits him that this smile is not for him. That you'd smile might never be his again, and he's desperate.
He'd do anything to have that kind of sunshine in his life again.
“(Y/n)?”
It's not even a choice to call your name. It just happens. And yeah, maybe he's a little drunk, and if he were sober, he'd have the decency to leave you alone, but he just can't.
One minute, you're locking eyes; the next, he's chasing after you in the crowd, asking you to wait, to just hear me out.
You don't stop for even a second. It's not until you're out of the club and halfway down the street that Jeongguk even manages to catch your jacket and bring you to a pause.
“(Y/n), please. Just wait—"
"What? What do you want, Jeongguk? What could you possibly want with me now?"
Jeongguk wants so much he doesn't know where to start. He tried to apologize, to tell you it was a mistake. He was so, so stupid to think he could ever live without you.
It's been a couple of months since Jeongguk left your bed and walked out of your life. The moment he left your side, he regretted it. And with every step he took away from you, the feeling of dread only got stronger.
He tried to brush it off, tried to reason it out. Things were still fresh; of course, he'd still feel an emotional connection to you. It would pass. Right?
Except it didn't. That empty, hollow, missing feeling didn't go away.
Not when he moved out. Not when he got his own empty, lonely apartment. Not even when Jeongguk tried dating again. Because no one he dated could compare to you.
That ache for you stayed. Always.
He wanted to tell you all of this, but he can't tell by the look on your face that he only has a couple of minutes—hell—seconds before you turn around and leave him behind. This time for good.
So Jeon Jeongguk kneeled, his knees pressing into the hard concrete beneath him. It was gravelly, and he could feel wet spots sink into his jeans from when it rained outside earlier, but he couldn't find it in himself to care about the mess.
All he cared about was you.
Jeongguk begs. "Please. Please give me another chance."
"What? You broke up with me, remember?" You moved to pull away, but Jeongguk held your hand, anything to keep you near.
"It was a mistake. Ending us was a mistake."
"Jeongguk… you're drunk. You won't even mean this in the morning."
"I mean it! I mean it."
I regret it every day." Jeongguk leaned forward, nuzzling his cheek against your thighs. Maybe it's a little pathetic, but he can't help himself; he needs to be close to you in any way he can. "Can't we just start over?"
"Jeongguk…"
Jeongguk looked up at you then, his nose red and his lashes wet with tears. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
He means it; he really does. Jeongguks hasn't been more sorry about anything in his life.
"If you give me another chance, I won't ever let you go again. Say yes. Please?"
Please, please, please?
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bangfantanfic · 2 years ago
Text
Our Own World: Chapter 11
Warnings: stalking, masturbation, yandere behavior, future smut. If I have missed anything please let me know :) 
 Type: romance, yandere, hyrbid!bts, somewhat slow burn.
tags; @miss-jupiter @imagine-forlife @blaaiissee @millenniumspec @toughbook @darkuni63 @badbyeyoongi @iloverubberduckiez-blog @missseoulite @singukieee @potterbrooke @suhappysuho @doublebunv @zae007live @sevenpersona @blancflms @childfmoonn @caffeineandreveries @cryingpages
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  You liked to think you were relatively positive as a person. You tried to look past the bad, power through, and make the best of a terrible situation. The last few months had been less than ideal but you were figuring things out, slowly albeit, but steadily improving. You had been proud. Pushing your discomfort aside, working on your fears and feelings of disgust. You had made solid improvement in creating some form of relationship with the seven strangers your brother had inconvenienced you with, and the road had been bumpy and slippery, and every other thing you’d hate a road to be, but it was finding smooth ground. Sure there had been a slight increase in tensions, and things had gotten a little uncomfortable with Jeongguk but you were positive you could push past it. He was testing you, of course. You were just as much a stranger to him, as he was to you. That had been easy enough to walk yourself through. Talk yourself through. 
This new situation was something steps, nor words could truly solve. 
Bile sat at the peak of your throat, the hammering of your heart threatening to push it out. Hoseok’s wide eyes on yours made your stomach knot so painfully tight you were sure it was moments away from rupture. It was evident that he was somewhat embarrassed, and at first while frantically trying to understand what the fuck was happening, you noticed. You wished you could take it back. Somehow convince your fritzing brain it saw wrong. But the evidence was so clear, just what the man had been doing in your room. 
“What happened?” 
The commotion around you sounded muffled. Like you were underwater having a conversation with someone on the edge of the pool. You must have screamed. You couldn’t remember doing it. The raw feeling in your throat could be explained if you had. Soothing hands rubbed at the bare skin of your shoulder, muted whispers tickling your ear. 
Who was talking to you? Their skin felt so cool against your surely clammy skin. It was a welcomed feeling. 
“Hoseok Hyung?”
The name seemed to echo for a second, the room quiet. And then it felt like a tsunami hit, the air forces from your lungs, a gasp of air so loud one would think you held your breath for hours. 
Hoseok was under your bed. Hoseok was staring at you, gripping white knuckles at a pair of your panties with his dick out. 
What the fuck. 
“Jimin, please take Y/n somewhere else.” Namjoon’s voice was eerily calm. The usual lighthearted tone was nowhere to be heard. His body was tense and tall, almost as if ready to pounce. 
Jimin had easily understood the urgency in his packmates' tone, and more than gladly ushered you off the floor. His packmates split aside like the Red Sea as he guided you out of the room, aching to pull you closer and hold your hand. But he knew better. 
The fox hybrid found you were compliant, letting him lead you wherever he wanted. If this had been any other situation he would have been thrilled. Happy to have you to himself, listening and obedient. If he was being honest, he was still rather happy, but it was dulled. At least he had you to himself for once. His pack was greedy, they didn’t understand that Jimin needed you more. You needed him more. 
Jimin had led you to his bedroom— well, shared bedroom. But it was empty as of now, so his. Personally, he would have preferred a room on the floor, his instincts wanting to be as low as possible but.. well, sometimes he just had to be thankful for what he had. Jimin had not minded sharing a room, not really. Not until you arrived and suddenly the space felt too small. How could he give you the perfect home, the perfect nest to raise children in, when the space was crowded? He had no privacy for his time with you. 
Once you realized how you and he are meant to be, he was sure things would change. You could both leave. The thought was slightly depressing. Leaving his pack would hurt. But that pain would be nothing compared to a life without his mate. It was an easy choice. An easy sacrifice. 
Seeing you in his room was a whole new feeling he wasn’t aware he was capable of making. You had been so awkward at first, standing limply by the closed door. He had thrown himself into his bed, sighing happily to be back in his own comfort. No strange smells, no looming anxiety, just contentment. He had watched as you took in the room, eyes flickering over every corner of the room before settling back on him. Jimin loved having your attention. It happened so rarely, and it would need to change. It was beginning to drive him insane. 
“Y/n, you should lie down, you look like you’re about to drop.” Jimin frowned, gently taking your fingers into his. 
You didn’t pull away. A grin threatened to bloom across the hybrid's lips, but he had to control himself. He didn’t need you to be upset with him either. You needed a friend, someone in this house you could feel comfortable with and clearly, his packmates were doing poorly. But not him. Perhaps all this distance between you and him hadn't been such a bad thing after all. He could make this all work in his favor. What a lucky fox indeed. 
Jimin’s room was technically the main master bedroom. The house had four bedrooms, and the study was a temporary room right now. The downstairs ‘master’ room Jay and Mila usually resided in was originally a guest suite, but seeing as there were more people than rooms, and the upstairs master was slightly bigger, it was divided up into three, tall makeshift shelving used as privacy walls. Namjoon, Seokjin, and Jimin all shared the master room, Yoongi and Hoseok in the next, and then the youngest two, Taehyung and Jeongguk in the third. Usually, the other four shared a bathroom, and then Jimin and his roommates shared the ensuite, but unfortunately, it needed some fixing after Namjoon’s last rage fit. So now all seven of them were stuck in one bathroom. You were kind enough to share Jay’s ensuite downstairs with whoever needed it, your brother wasn’t as soft-hearted. 
The hardwood floors were scratched up from the rearranging of furniture, and the walls were painted a cool gray with white trimming, a neutral color to match three different men. You couldn’t see past Jimin’s section, his being the first. A double bed shoved in the corner, one bedside table covered with wrappers,  a laptop, and a tissue box. His bed was covered in pillows, blankets, and articles of clothing. Despite how messy it sounded, the cluttered bed was still somewhat neat. Almost as if every item was placed purposefully, carefully. A few shelves lined the walls, and manga was neatly lined in order. They looked so well cared for, you wondered if they had even been read. The space was clean, other than the half-unpacked suitcase on the floor and headphones dangling from the laptop. 
“Y/n?” Jimin was starting to feel antsy. He had watched you look over the entirety of his side of the room, and he felt anxious. Did you not like it? If he had planned for you to be in his room, he definitely would have cleaned up... And emptied the bin by his bed. 
Jimin could have sworn he melted when your eyes met his, a little smile on your lips. Sure, it was forced, but it was for him. You were trying to look okay, for him. 
Holding out his hand, he watched as you placed yours in his so softly, without hesitation. You weren’t scared of him at this moment, he truly had to thank Hoseok. Your hand was smooth in his, soft and warm. Did all of your skin feel this delicate? He could feel your heartbeat under his fingertips, your blood thundering through your veins. An involuntary shiver ran up his spine at the thought of your pretty skin bloody and bruised. 
With a soft tug, Jimin had you on the mattress with him. His nest would need fixing later, but for once he wasn’t bothered. Your fingers were still linked with his, and your eyes closed. Despite the tranquil look on your face, your chest raised rapidly. Jimin frowned. You weren’t as relaxed as he was. He knew why, but why? Sighing, he shifted to look at you better. You peeked through one eye. You looked so tired. It made his heart ache, he wants to look after you. 
“Y/n, I’m sorry.” He wasn’t entirely sure why he was apologizing. He knew for a fact he hadn't done anything to you. He had been walking on eggshells since you arrived, wanting to keep you happy. Sure, he had maybe gotten a little clingy and touchy, but your presence was so intoxicating that he couldn’t help himself. He likes to think he held himself back rather well. Perhaps he was sorry on behalf of his pack. Moreso Jeongguk and Hoseok. He wasn’t entirely sure what had happened with Jeongguk, and he felt a little guilty knowing that whatever had happened between the two of you, he could have been there to help had he not run off with Hoseok. 
But Hoseok. While he wasn’t entirely sure what had happened, Jimin wasn’t an idiot. He could piece things together. He had seen enough to have a good inkling about what his packmate had been doing in your room– hell, he could smell it. 
“You have nothing to be sorry for, Jimin.” 
Jimin. Jimin. Jimin. 
The way you whispered his name was heavenly. Like you were telling him a secret. He loved when you spoke his name, it sent tingles through his nerves and sent his stomach spinning. Nothing had ever sounded so sweet. He knew he had nothing to really be sorry for, but it felt right to say and he had been right. You finally responded to him. 
Your breathing had eased, not quite as labored as minutes ago, but the grip you had on his hand had tightened. He wished Namjoon would have lowered his voice a little more so he could enjoy the sound of you breathing. He was jealous of your poor hearing quality at this moment– and honestly some others. It must be nice to live so unaware of everything around you. 
Namjoon wasn’t sure he had ever felt this angry before. The fearful expression you bore as Jimin all but dragged your paled form out of the room had nearly broken his heart. You hadn’t looked up from the floor, wide eyes glued to the floor as if trying to comprehend what was happening. He wished he had been the one leading you, comforting you. But of course, he couldn’t. Not when Jay had left him in charge of your care. He had a duty to you, and even if Jay hadn’t requested this of him, he still would do the same. The rest of his pack's feelings didn’t matter to him when it came to you. He was well aware that there were a few others that may have shared a similar sentiment toward you as he did, but he knew that what he felt was vastly different. You were the first human woman they had spent time with, it was excitement, lustful almost. Not for him. Your soul had been specifically created to mesh with his. A perfect match.
And they were driving you away. 
“Namjoon, maybe you should step away fo–” Seokjin’s words died on his tongue, the poisonous look his leader shot his way was more than enough. Instead, he sighed, pressing his tongue against the meat of his cheek in frustration. 
“Hoseok, get out from under there.” Namjoon barked, jaw so tense he was sure he could feel his teeth cracking. A dentist visit will be needed after tonight. 
Five sets of eyes watched as the snow leopard awkwardly shimmied out from under the bed, hands still white-knuckled around a piece of cloth. His head hung shamefully, cheeks flushed in embarrassment. He was usually so careful. The look of disgust and fear had his stomach so tight he couldn’t breathe. 
The wolf hybrid stalked closer, leaving an inch between them. When Hoseok made no move to meet his leader's eyes, Namjoon felt his anger bubble over, the calming breaths he had been attempting to use were failing him. Hoseok had flinched when Namjoon had raised his hand, expecting a hit. Instead, nails dug into the elder's jaw, forcing him to meet his leader's eyes. 
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Namjoon asked calmly. If Hoseok couldn’t see the man's face he wouldn’t have guessed he was angry. The pulse in his throat was rapid, and his teeth grinding painfully was what gave away the simmering anger. The hold on his jaw was beginning to ache, and his knees felt like jelly under all the accusing eyes. 
He knew he was wrong, of course, he was. But how could he explain himself? ‘Sorry Joonie, spending a rut alone and having my mate so damned close I just couldn’t control myself, my bad.’ 
Of course not. He was sure that would have him sporting a shiny black eye. 
“Joon, I’m so sorry–” 
“Bullshit!” Taehyung scoffed, the only prey in the room frustrated. “You and Jeongguk are fucking this all up, you’re ruining it!” 
Taehyung was sick of it. The perfect opportunity had been served to him on a golden platter. A pandemic that would force Jay to stay away longer, and you to stay with him. An indefinite period of time for him to court you. A love story he could tell his grandchildren. But then fucking Namjoon had ratted to Jay about the early ruts, for ‘safety’ reasons. Leaving Taehyung locked away from you for two goddamn weeks! And somehow in that little time, they had fucked up everything, sending him back to square one. He was sick of this. He just wanted his mate, and everyone here couldn’t seem to control themselves and were scaring you away. 
Seokjin rested a hand on the younger man's shoulder, giving him a gentle squeeze. He pitied the boy. The younger three were still so clueless about love, he was sure the monkey had dreamed too big and was struggling to accept that you just weren’t quite there yet. The poor boy had most likely made a movie like a love story in his mind and found it frustrating that the plot didn't move as fast as he wanted. He was impatient and greedy. Perhaps it was his fault for giving him everything. 
Hoseok’s eyes couldn’t even flicker in Taehyung's direction. His eyes cemented Namjoon's. Too scared to even blink. The wolf looked ready to rip his throat out with his teeth. Nothing was stopping him from doing so either. He was sure the rest of his pack would just watch it happen. How depressing
Namjoon shoved the leopard away, Hoseok stumbling before hitting the floor. The pack leader turned back to the others, frustration oozing from every pore he had. “Clearly, some of us have forgotten how to respect boundaries.” He sighed, fingers pinching the bridge of his nose as he took shuddering breaths. “Are you trying to run her away?” 
Namjoon watched the shake of heads; no. 
“Then why the fuck are you acting this way? Do you want Jay back?” He hissed. Their owner was able to return whenever they requested, Namjoon had asked him to stay with Mila’s family a bit longer, and his human was more than happy to comply. Honestly, Namjoon had a lot more control over his owner than he would ever admit. 
“You’re all to leave Y/n alone. She will seek you out if she wants to, but until then leave her be.” 
Seokjin found the rule to be a bit much, but he had no choice but to agree. Namjoon knew what was best, even if it felt unfair. At least in the rules he had set, they were allowed to speak with you during dinners, and greet you in passing, but they weren’t to seek you out. That was easy enough. Seokjin already knew your routine like the back of his hand. 
___
“Y/n… Y/n, wakey wakey~” 
You grunted at the gentle shaking, limply trying to brush the hand away.
“Aw come on sleepyhead, I really gotta pee.” 
Who even was that? Was someone in your room? When did you even fall asleep... In your room? Hoseok was in your room...
Your eyes flew open, greeted by the dark. You could roughly make out the layout of the room and it definitely wasn’t yours, this was far more lived in. Your pillow wasn’t this firm either. Your hand brushed over the material, frowning. It was much rougher than your pillowcase. Not silk at all. 
“You’re getting a little low there.” Jimin’s strained voice whined out.
Jimin. 
You jolted up, scrambling to the other side of the bed. Your face felt like it was on fire, how embarrassing. You were just feeling up the poor dude. 
“Oh my god– Jimin, Jimin I am so sorry!” You groaned, pressing the heel of your palms into your eyes willing yourself to go completely blind. You may not be able to see in the dark but you could still feel his eyes burning over you. 
Jimin had to bite his tongue, and stop himself from telling you just how much he enjoyed your hands on him. You had fallen asleep some time ago, wrapping yourself around his torso. Your pretty head resting so gently on his shoulder. It was his own piece of heaven. He spent hours playing with your hair, smelling it, kissing it. He smelt just like you. He had put off waking you up for as long as possible, wanting to soak the moment in, not knowing when he would ever have it again. But of course, his bladder had other ideas. 
Waking you up hadn’t gone to plan. Turns out you were an incredibly deep sleeper, the new information sparking excitement. He wondered how far he could go, what he could do before you would woke up. When you finally did open your eyes, you didn’t seem all there. Your eyes move across the darkened room. Your heartbeat had picked up slightly, panicked at the new surroundings. He had gone to speak, he really had. He was going to comfort you, and remind you where you were… but your hands. It was light at first, fingertips grazing over his clothed chest. Pressing, putting pressure. You hummed thoughtfully, and he felt his heart spasm in his chest. Palm down and trailing over his chest before sinking lower, lower, traveling downward. He knew his shirt had risen a little, you wiggled a lot in your sleep. Your pinky had just brushed over his bare skin, feather-light. Jimin had felt his throat close up, his joints locking him in place. 
Speak. Speak. Speak, Jimin. 
When he had finally managed to spit out words, your whole frame had frozen up before pushing him away. He grunted at the force, pouting. You looked incredibly flustered, and he couldn’t say he didn’t resemble you. He was incredibly thankful for the darkness of the room, the hard-on threatening to bust through his sweatpants would have sent Jimin to an early grave. 
Here lies Park Jimin
1995-2021
Beloved packmate. 
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” He mumbled, shuffling himself into a sitting position. He quickly pulled one of the many blankets of his nest and placed it over his lap before turning on the light on his bedside table. The pale light lit up the room enough for him to see your face clearly. He had rather good eyesight in the dark, but he preferred to see you with the lights on. 
“I was just surprised.” You defended, arms crossing over your chest. “You don’t scare me.” 
Jimin grinned, licking his lips.  The lovesick side of Jimin’s brain was preening. You weren’t scared of him, of course, you weren’t! He was here to protect you. You were his, and he yours. Life has specifically made your souls for each other. How could he hurt you? 
A side of Jimin that he would rather ignore was thrilled by your comment. You weren’t scared of him, but he could change it so easily. What fun it would be to have you terrified under him, how far could he push you? 
“I can be very scary.” Jimin teased, leaning closer. Your eyes rolled, making Jimin simper. “Do you want me to prove it to you?” 
You laughed softly, shaking your head at the challenging tone. Out of all of the men in the house, Jimin was probably who you felt safest with. Seokjin was a close second, but knowing what he was spliced with, you were apprehensive. Jimin reminded you of a kid, playful and cheeky. 
 “Sure Jimin, prove it.” 
The fox hybrid's body shivered in excitement, his tail swishing wildly behind him, a blurred movement. “You asked for it.” 
—-
A/n; every time I post I feel like I’ve missed something ;-; anyways hope you enjoy, it’s all downhill from here 🥰
318 notes · View notes
sweetiereads · 2 years ago
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dreamlike letters / 2023
ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ⁘ february bts fic recs ⁘
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𝐋 𝐄 𝐆 𝐄 𝐍 𝐃
[ f ] 𝖿𝗅𝗎𝖿𝖿 ; [ a ] 𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗌𝗍 ; [ s ] 𝗌𝗆𝗎𝗍 ; [ 𝖼 ] 𝖼𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗄
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(𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫) 𝐥𝐞𝐟𝐭 𝐮𝐧𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 ; 𝐣𝐣𝐤 @angelguk ❥ oneshot, { a }
maybe if you’d reached out a little further, held his hand a little tighter, it wouldn’t hurt this bad to let go. except it would - it always would. because the one person you’ll never be able to let go is jeongguk. 
+ highlights: I love angst for a particular reason and your writing is another testiment as to why. What makes it so painful is in the way it's written--so beautifully, it hurts.
Every word you wrote was intentional with its placement which really pulls us in as readers. It's so easy to be immersed into your stories.
Your writing comes across soft and gentle, with witty remarks that make it lively and sweet. I just live for the poetic moments you've written in.
❥full review
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𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐭 ; 𝐣𝐣𝐤 @vsualitae ❥ oneshot, { s }
Your days off finally matched up and after waking up later than usual, Jungkook is feeling well rested and quite amorous.
+ highlights: I am in love with the way you set the scene here. It made it so easy to be immersed and feel like we were really there in bed under the duvet with jk 🥺 There are tiny details like the description of the cold weather too and it made the entire thing more cozy. I loved the use of contrast in that way!
I live for reader and Jungkook’s dynamic! Their relationship seemed so authentic, just what I envision a fwb relationship would be like with him. One with lots of teasing and of course, it wouldn’t be jk without mentioning his competitive streak.
❥ full review
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𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐝 ; 𝐤𝐧𝐣 @ahundredtimesover ❥ oneshot, { a + s }
For years as a sculptor, you felt detached from your own work - unable to title them, describe them, name the most basic emotions that artists should be in tune with. A chance encounter with a man one winter night finds you in a journey of finding your own meaning. And as you slowly discover what it means to create and to feel, you find out that this might also be what pulls both of you far apart.
+ highlights: I am feeling so many things all at once and strongly at that, that it is almost painful. you captured everything I love and admire about Namjoon and formulated it into something so beauful and introspective. The themes of love and intimacy are some of my favouite to read about. You've executed it so beautifully. The story is gut wrenching in all the right ways. There wasn't a moment where my heart wasn't in my throat, I feel so much for this couple.
❥ full review - to be posted !
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+ misc // non - bts // k-pop
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𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐝𝐠𝐞 ; 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐠 @dark-muse-iris ❥ oneshot, { a + s } On the last night before you break up with your girlfriend of two years, you say goodbye the only way you know how.
+ highlights: I don’t think I’ve ever felt so much pain in my life omg.
I feel so much for Reader and Handong. The dramatic irony here is what makes everything so painful. Reader spending this night with her knowing it’ll be the last while Handong remains none the wiser (I am ill).
Your writing was so beautiful and that is what makes it more painful. The contrast of Handong’s pleasure, and what lies ahead just beyond the threshold of their relationship. How reader can’t help herself and continues to fuel the fire.
❥ full review
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224 notes · View notes
clubdionysus · 3 months ago
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[BAD DECISION #60] Obduracy
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warnings: starlovers!!!! <33 i really luv jimin in this one hehehe, lots of callbacks to earlier chapters!! fingering, pretty tame by their standards!!! but kinda semi-public? i mean they're at home but like... kitchen?? i dunno up to you to decide!
a/n: this one doesnt have a little cover image :( had to make it fresh :( the first non wattpad chapter :( waaaa. im hoping to having something new ready for you tomorrow hehehehhe
wc: 8.3K
bd total wc: 540k (ongoing)
AO3 | MASTERLIST | MINORS DNI
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Jeongguk wears his hangovers incredibly well. Like an oversized shirt draped over his broad shoulders, it billows down his body, leaving you to guess what's hidden underneath. 
It's hard to tell if he's suffering like you are, for his face gives nothing but contentment away.
Hair messy and dishevelled, it sits like an unruly crown on his head as he washes dishes left from the evening before. A soft smile lingers on his lips as he hums along to the song quietly playing through the kitchen speaker, his voice far prettier than the original singer. The king of his very own kitchen, there's an innate flick to his wrists as he shakes water off steel bowls and pops them on the drying rack. 
Chest bare, he pays it no mind when tiny flecks of warm water splash against his skin.
Vines of ink trail up his arm and onto his shoulder. His self-modification proves he wasn't born from gold but rather polished to resemble something like it. 
In a way, it makes him so much more valuable. Or at least it does to you.
As you watch on from a bar stool on the opposite side of the kitchen island, chatting with him about the events of the night before, you wonder how it's possible for a man with a smile like his to have a body like that. 
The maths just doesn't compute, but you've never been great with numbers. Have always been more drawn to art—and God, what a work Jeongguk is.
Quite the contrary, you wear your hangovers with far less grace. 
There's glitter all over your skin, and your hair looks more like a bird's nest than a crown.
In front of you sits a barely touched glass of water and two Tylenol tablets yet to be taken. The thud in your head has only intensified since you woke up with a dry throat and achy body, but you're trying to push through it. 
"You're only making it worse," Jeongguk softly scolds you when you whine and slump down to rest your head on the countertop. "Don't be so stubborn."
When he talks like that, all assertive and domineering, it only makes you wanna be even more stubborn. It's in part thanks to your defiant nature, but also in part due to your desperation to have him use that tone of voice with you again.
"I can defeat it," you whine against the cold stone, a pathetic moan humming in your throat. 
With your hair still damp from your shower, you find yourself irritated by how quickly Jeongguk's hair dries compared to yours. It's your own fault, for you're the one who insists on changing its colour with the seasons, but it annoys you nonetheless.
Then again, everything irritates you when you're this hungover.
Truth be told, you'd happily get your hair wet all over again, if it meant you got to indulge in another shower with Jeongguk. Want nothing more than to relieve the way it feels for him to shampoo your hair, rubbing the pads of his fingers in circular motions against your scalp. If the restaurant doesn't work out, he could always opt to be a hairdresser, you think, then mentally reprimand yourself for daring to even think of a scenario in which the restaurant doesn't work out. Would never forgive yourself if you jinxed it.
Jeongguk doesn't mind the grouchiness that comes with your hangovers, 'cause they always come with an added side of clinginess, too. You had wrapped around him like a koala bear for that entire shower. Had your cheek to his chest, arms tightly locked around his back, eyes firmly closed as he washed your hair.
Gorgeous girl, he thinks to himself, then resumes the stern telling off he was giving you. Just wants you to feel okay, that's all. Knows you're too determined for your own good, sometimes.
"Clearly," he almost scoffs, not mean but definitely a little curt. His head's killing him, too. He just hides it better. Swinging open the fridge, he grabs a bottle of water—2 litres—and cracks open the seal. "Take your pills, or I won't get you anything when I order breakfast."
"Gguk," you whine, slowly sitting up straight to look at him with the biggest pout. Head tipped back, he's chugging on his water straight from the bottle at such a rate you're surprised he doesn't choke.
By the time he's finished, he's practically at the halfway point of the bottle. Shaking his head, he swallows his last mouthful down. Pants, a little. Says, "Water, pills, now."
Narrowing your eyes, you finally do as you're told, but make sure to say, "You're mean."
Jeongguk just shakes his head. "I love you."
With your eyes on his, you try your hardest not to show any sign of weakness—but when he presses his lips into a thin, curved line and smiles in a way that makes it impossible to fight, you can't help yourself. 
"Fine," you strop regardless, tossing your pills back and swallowing them down with a chug of water.
"See," he softly says in a way that is both patronising yet ever so gentle. 
He walks around the counter to stand beside you, and welcomes the innate way your hand reaches up to hold his waist. He's just the same in how his hand cradles your cheek, keeping your face angled to look up towards him. 
"Wasn't so hard, was it, baby?" He gently toys.
"You're the worst," you assure him, 'cause he knows he's being a little git right now.
And so, just like the last incredibly soft insult thrown his way, he fends it off by saying, "I love you."
"If you really loved me, you would have let me stay in bed."
"We have shit to do today, B," he reminds you. "I forced you up because I love you. Now, don't be rude. Say it back."
Jeongguk's ability to demand you say such heavy, ardent words is nothing short of a miracle. 
When you first met Jeongguk, the idea of him being so straightforward and forthcoming with his own feelings felt like an impossible task. Yet here he is, unafraid to tell you how much he cares for you, and unashamed to ask for reciprocation.
Tugging him a little closer, you rest your pointed chin against his sternum, and get him looking down towards you. 
Quietly, you whisper, "You know I love you."
"Say it again," he demands once more, his heavy-lidded eyes trained on yours as he speaks.
"I love you."
He smiles, now. Nods. 
"Good," he says, then pulls away to grab his phone and open up a delivery app. Has his favourite cafe pinned to the top. Clicks through to the menu without a second thought, muscle memory prevailing. "French toast? Iced coffee?"
"You know me so well," you hum with a pleasant smile, hopping off the bar stool and meandering over to Jeongguk's sofa. 
He follows you without hesitation and tugs the blanket from the armchair as he does so. You're wearing one of his shirts, and he's just in a pair of sweats, so a blanket seems like a sensible choice for now. 
Jimin still hasn't risen from his pit, and Nabi's clothes are still in the living room—just in a neat pile now, thanks to Jeongguk's innate need for a clean space to ensure he can power through his hangover. 
"You reckon they're gonna wake up soon?" You ask Jeongguk as he snuggles in beside you, flicking on the television. 
"Not a chance," he laughs. "Nabi's probably gonna escape out his bedroom window or something like that. Spent years denying there was anything going on, and I don't think her pride will be able to take the hit of being wrong."
"You never know," you begin to playfully theorise. "Maybe they're just friends."
"Have you forgotten getting home last night?"
"Well, yeah, but I mean, I shagged you plenty of times, and we've always just been friends."
"Oh, fuck off," he laughs. "We've never been just friends."
"No?"
"No," he says with a cocksure confidence that has been earned over many months of knowing you as intimately as he does. Smiling as you roll your eyes, you don't bother fighting back. It's a losing cause. "We're best friends. Duh."
If you could have it your way, the day would be spent exactly like this—cuddled up on Jeongguk's sofa without a care in the world—but you've got work to do.
The gallery needs to be cleaned up from the night before. It's not a huge amount of work, but still tedious labour that you'd rather not do with a raging headache. One of the reasons you're given such liberty with the gallery space is because you always make sure it's left without a trace, and so you know you need to get it sorted sooner rather than later.
Jeongguk's offered to help out, 'cause his day is empty. Other than discussing the business with Yoongi, his agenda is remarkably clear, and if he's being honest, the last thing he wants is to talk about the restaurant. 
See, Jeongguk worries. He's got everything in the palm of his hand—his girl, his dreams, his future. All it takes is one misstep, and he could lose everything.
Comfort is found in you. Solace.
"Smell good," he mumbles, nuzzling his nose against the curve of your neck, sinking into a more comfortable position snuggled up against you. Doesn't kiss you, but he does let his lips trail up your skin in a way that promises he eventually will.
"Smell like you," you sweetly reply, 'cause none of your things have made their way into his home yet. The shampoo you use is his. The shower gel, the moisturiser, the suncream. It's all him—and you love nothing more than going home with such innocent reminders of him on your skin.
"Mhm," he confirms. That's exactly why he likes it so much. The silage of you is the signpost of him. "Mine."
Any gap between you (which admittedly isn't much at all) is eliminated with the way Jeongguk drags you into his embrace. It's the kind of hug that can only be described as acceptance: there is no you, nor him. Just the pair of you, together. 
It's dangerous territory to embark upon, with such reliance on another person, but it's also a path that you just can't seem to resist.
Laced in berries, the hedgerows of this rambling walk you're strolling down together keep you going forward. Occasionally, you'll stop. Smell the roses. Pluck a berry here or there. Pause when you hear the noise of a wild beast in the forest that surrounds you, or the threatening echo of a farmer and his gun.
But then forwards, you'll go. Destination, unknown. Wherever you end up is exactly where you'll need to be.
The wait for food is wasted away together, dumb conversations about nothing and anything that comes to mind. Jeongguk toys with your fingers. Plays with your rings. Strokes the pad of his index finger over the small callous on your middle one.
"Used to be worse," you acknowledge, holding up your hand to study it. Back when you were in school, the amount of writing and doodling you did meant a callous was inevitable. Now that you're out of the habit of doodling, and far less likely to spend hours writing by hand, it's softened. Almost looks as if it wasn't even there to begin with. Part of your history that is slowly fading away.
One day, you won't be able to recall any part of your life that isn't inexplicitly saturated by him.
He holds up his own hands. Studies them against yours. It's like some juvenile flirt, comparing hand sizes, as if your legs aren't tangled with his, and his other hand isn't wedged between your thighs. 
You're not learning anything new. Are revising, for a lack of a better term. Just like you used to do with the birds, when you wanted any excuse you could use to be intimate with one another. 
It's different now, you suppose. Intimacy. How you view it. Just isn't what it once was. 
Things that used to be sacred to you are now second nature.
Glancing across to Jeongguk as he natters on about the deep line that runs along his palm, and how it signals he's destined for greatness, you realise there's an ache blooming in your chest. 
His pouty lips rabbit on, dark eyes occasionally fluttering across to you, then back to his hand. 
There's a vulnerability to him. It's his eyes, you think, and their need to check in on you. He's making sure you're listening. Interested. Aren't bored or waiting for him to shut up. It's a somewhat nervous habit of his, stemming from the fact he doesn't ever really talk this much with anyone else. 
In a way that no one else is lucky enough to experience, Jeongguk opens himself up to you. About the big and the bad, the emotional and the heavy, but also about the small, lovely, lightweight things, too. Weather talk, mindless chatter he'd never bother engaging in with other people. 
He talks of superstitions and legends, movies he watched as a kid, and dreams he had overnight—a stream of consciousness, all for you.
See, Jeongguk talks. 
Around you, he talks and talks and talks.
If his mother could see him like this, she'd be gobsmacked. He's always been the more quiet one of her sons. Reserved. Cautious to speak in fear of saying the wrong thing.
But he's childlike in his eagerness to share with you, Bambi eyes wide and sparkling, teeth nibbling down on his bottom lip whenever he leaves enough room for you to respond. 
Time is lost in conversation until his doorbell chimes—a notice of food arriving. 
"Go get changed," you say, tapping on his knee as you get to your feet. "I'll sort out breakfast." 
Nodding, he does as he's told, lightly spanking your ass before heading to his room. Glancing over your shoulder, you feign a little hurt.
"I'll kiss it better," he promises, and you know he will. 
The curse of his devotion to you means he can never lie. 
He can, however, keep secrets. Small ones. Teeny tiny ones that will have no consequence other than to make you melt when he finally reveals them.
Checking his phone, Jeongguk smiles to himself when he notices a notification of confirmation—plans made now rolling into motion. You cope with surprises far better than he does. Appreciate the romanticism of it all. He's sure you'll like it.
When he comes back into the kitchen, you have to hold in a desperate groan. Who gave him the right to look like that? And how many cats did you save from trees in a previous life to deserve it?
Dressed for the gym, he's in a pair of dark shorts that sit on his hips as if they were made just for him. The contours of his upper body are on display for everyone to see, a tight black compression shirt outlining the ridges on his chest. 
The silver chain he always wears is tucked outside of the shirt, 'cause he doesn't like the pressure of the fabric on top of it, and his hair lays flat against his head. He's perfectly undone.
As he's putting on a pair of socks by the sofa, he clocks you staring. Simply hums, "Hm?"
Eyes wide and unassuming, he's oblivious to the fact you feel like you might faint just by looking at him, even if the socks he's putting on have individual spaces for each of his toes.
We can't all be perfect, after all—though Jeongguk would argue his socks encourage correct toe alignment, which could only be a good thing. 
"Anyone ever told you that you're a menace to society?" You painfully whine, the groan you were hiding making its presence known.
Almost bashful, Jeongguk tips his head to the side, eyes twinkling your reflection back at you. 
"Flattery won't convince me to let you go back to bed," he teases, playing off the compliment. Socks on, he makes his way over to you without hesitation, his tattooed arm draping over your shoulders, as he presses a kiss to the side of your head. 
"Was worth a try," you playfully tease him, even if you did mean it. Hooking your arm around his waist, you give him a squeeze and glance up towards him. A tender kiss is given and received, his lips softly curving into a smile against yours. "Eat up. Quicker we leave, the quicker you can get to the gym, and the quicker you can come back to mine afterwards."
The outline of your day is solid: go to the gallery and get it cleaned up, meander back to town with Jeongguk, send him on his way to the gym, pick up some groceries and then head home. 
Small errands that will eat up most of the day, but an empty evening that can be spent exactly as you'd like: with him.
"We at yours tonight?" He hums, still getting used to just how easy it is to coexist next to you. Never in his wildest dreams could he have imagined a life like this. 
"Feel like Jimin might need the privacy," you note, very much aware that he hasn't made a single appearance, which is very unlike him. He's normally reciting lines from The Notebook by this point in the morning.
You know he's fine, 'cause you heard the synthetic ding of his speaker being turned on a little while earlier, presumably to drown out any 'conversations' he might be having. 
Jeongguk smirks, picking out a strawberry from the container next to the french toast, and says, "He never gave us privacy."
Tossing the strawberry to his back teeth, there's a smile on Jeongguk's lips that's impossible not to mirror. Turning slightly, you get yourself trapped between his body and the kitchen island. Wrap your arms around his neck. Encourage him down to nudge his nose against yours.
"Yeah, but he also never caught us having sex," you remind Jeongguk, lips brushing against his. Breakfast can wait. Or maybe the menu can just change. "We were incredibly well-behaved as far as he's concerned."
"We were?" Jeongguk quietly flirts, his hips pressing against your tummy, letting you know just how much he enjoys being with you. "I don't think you've ever been well behaved."
"Oh, but I am," you simper right back. Reaching down for his hands, you encourage them to roam your body. Squeeze them over your chest, then encourage them down to the tops of your thighs—or, more specifically, between them. "I'm such a good girl for you, aren't I?"
Pressing his fingers up against your thinly-covered cunt, Jeongguk smirks, the subtle markers of your arousal greeting him like they so often do.
"You are," he nods. "And you're gonna be good for me now aren't you?" His fingers hook the lace of your underwear to the side, and gently begin to tease your wet folds. "Gonna keep it nice and quiet for me, huh?"
Nodding, you let yourself succumb to your unbridled desire to have your lips on his as he sinks his middle finger into your cunt. With a small whine, you totally disregard the promise you've only just made.
And so Jeongguk shakes his head, still kissing you. Barely parts from your lips when he says, "Shush, shush, shush, baby. Quiet for me."
When he pushes a second finger into you, your brows furrow, but the whine you're dying to sound out just vibrates into his mouth. 
"Attagirl," he praises as his fingers begin to pump inside of you. Deepening his kisses, Jeongguk strokes his tongue against yours, as if your body was just made for him to claim. Signed, sealed, delivered: his. Your hips roll into his movements, but it's not enough. 
As much as he wants to keep you plugged, Jeongguk wants easy access more. 
Pulling his fingers from your cunt, there's a satisfied grin on his pretty lips when you whine. 
"Shush," he says with such affection it could make even the coldest heart thaw. Dipping slightly, he hooks his forearms just beneath your ass and swiftly lifts you up. Gets you perched up on the counter. Spreads your legs, and is pleased when you lift the hem of the baggy shirt you're wearing to fully reveal your pussy to him. 
"Look at you, gorgeous," he husks. Genuinely thinks he might die just from looking at your cunt. Too perfect. Too fuckin' nice. Stroking his still-wet fingers up your folds, he wastes no time sinking two fingers into you once more. "Quiet, baby."
"Room," you breathlessly say, desperately trying not to make any sounds that could give yourselves away. "Don't wanna be quiet. Take me to your room."
Jeongguk just smirks. Looks in your pretty eyes and challenges you. "Say chess. I'm not going to my room, but you can say chess."
He knows there's absolutely no way in hell you're saying chess. 
Narrowing your eyes, you reach to the front of his shorts, and stroke his hard cock through the fabric. If he's gonna make this hard for you, then you're gonna do it right back.
"If you're gonna torture me then you may as well do it right," you feign a little boredom, tugging his shorts down just enough to play with him over his boxers. "Your fingers are nothing, baby." A lie, but that's neither here nor there. "Make things difficult for me. Make it impossible for me to keep quiet."
"You really want Jimin to find out, huh?" Jeongguk teases, still playing on the idea that you've ever managed to convince anyone that you are, in fact, just friends. "You want him to know that we fuck?"
But then Jeongguk glances over your shoulder to the doorway that leads into Jimin's room, as the click of his latch goes. Jeongguk barely has enough time to pull his fingers from you, and definitely not enough time to pull his shorts back up over his boxer-covered boner, so instead, he presses up against you to keep himself covered. Thank God he's behind the island and not anywhere else.
If you thought it was torture before, then now must be a whole new level, just a few layers of fabric keeping you apart.
"It lingers, y'know," the grouchy voice of Jimin echoes from behind you. 
Turning your head, thighs squeezing against Jeongguk's hips to keep his dignity protected, you try to hide your embarrassment. 
Jeongguk's hands rest on your thighs, and the one that's out of sight to Jimin is being wiped against your skin to rid his fingers of your arousal. This could have been so much worse than what it is.
"The smell of sex," he adds with a little disdain. "I always knew."
As if the God of Thunder personally gave birth to him, Jimin's face is stormy as can be. His scowl is so deeply ingrained into his expression that you're certain the wind must have changed in his direction as he was first pulling the face. Whatever you drank last night, he must have had it too.
Hair all haphazard, face a little dewey from a warm slumber, there's an unusual dishevelled nature to Jimin. He's not even bothered to put on clothes. Is quite literally in just a pair of boxers. 
It's quite unlike him. Then again, so are the hickies on his collarbones. 
"Well, that's weird, 'cause me and Jeongguk have never had sex," you reply without even thinking, the lies ingrained into your reflexes at this point. Even Jeongguk looks at you with confusion this time. 
"Firstly, we eat off that counter, sickos. And secondly, I heard," Jimin simply assures you both, walking to the counter and picking up a plastic fork. He sticks it into a chunk of the french toast, and doesn't ask permission. Just chows down on it. Speaks with his mouth full. "Like, so many times. In fact, I've heard you at it so many times I can almost predict what's happening when."
"Bullshit," Jeongguk laughs—and he'd be right. Jimin's never heard, not properly at least, unless you count the muffled groans in Pohang that put him off his food for an entire day. He just hates the embarrassment of being walked in upon by the pair of you. The one time he needed privacy the most and he didn't even think to bolt the door—or better yet, go to his own bloody bedroom. He wants you to know what his embarrassment feels like. Jeongguk is unphased, though. "Nabi still here?"
"Shut up," Jimin replies, pulling the rest of the french toast towards him, closing the lid. He narrows his eyes, then snatches the box right up. Holds it to his chest. Scowls at you both. Turns on his heel and returns to his room, grinning now that you can't see him, shutting the door behind himself. 
Neither of you stop him. 
"Is he…"
"Okay?" Jeongguk finishes off your query. "No idea."
But one thing for certain is that Nabi's possessions are still very much inside the apartment. She's still here, and you're willing to bet he shut the door with a smile, holding his stolen breakfast with all the triumph of a cat who got the cream. 
"On that note," you begin to tangent off, knowing you've already wasted too much of the day. "You okay to drive? Or would you rather take the subway?"
"Subway," Jeongguk immediately responds, reaching over to take a sip of his coffee. "Don't wanna risk it."
And he also wants any excuse he can find to spend time with you. Takes three times as long to get to The Ryu on public transport than it does in his car, especially with how he drives.
"Alright," you don't argue against him or bother suggesting a taxi instead. "And am I cool to leave my things here? I'll pick them up next time—"
"You know you don't need to ask," Jeongguk grins, the ring in the corner of his mouth flipping ever so slightly in that heavenly way it so often does. 
"Well, yeah, but—"
"Keep it here," he says. "Don't take your stuff home next time. Leave it. I'll clear a drawer. Some hangers."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah," he nudges his nose up against yours. "You've been leaving glitter here for months. May as well move onto something more substantial."
As if your heart isn't enough.
"Plus," he considers. "At least that way you can stop stealing all my favourite shirts."
"You love it when I wear your shirts."
"B, I love it when you wear nothing at all," he smirks. "Clothes have nothing to do with it. But on that note, go put some clothes on so we can actually do something with our day."
Reluctantly, you agree.
And just as reluctantly, he lets you go.
The subway is always crowded at this time of day. Jeongguk insists you sit while he stands in front of you, holding on to the railing that runs overhead. It's a small kindness—the kind you never really thought about until you met him and learned how lovely it is to have someone actually care about your comfort and well-being. 
He doesn't spend the journey on his phone like so many of the other commuters. Instead, he focuses on the windows, and the small glimpses indicating where you are along the subway line. Occasionally he'll look down at you and smile. Though you're not sleeping, your eyes are closed, cutting out the harsh lights of the tin can you're situated inside. You've never been more desperate for your bed. 
Once you reach your stop, Jeongguk tightly scoots in behind you on the escalators.
"We can have a quiet night in," he softly promises. His hand rubs at your waist, and the elevated position of your body allows him to press a kiss to your shoulder.
Even despite the fabric of your shirt—one that belongs to him, of course—it still feels like a star is burning through your very being. 
Nodding, you place your hand over his and squeeze ever so gently. Reciprocate his warmth. 
You don't mean to be so grouchy and unexpressive, the hangover just really is killing you. If it wasn't for the video Jeongguk insisted on assessing after waking you up this morning, you might not have even recalled exactly just how raunchy you'd been with him at Dionysus. 
Fucking someone at work had always been one of his covert fantasies; the kind of thing he wanted to do just so he could say that he had. Wouldn't mind leaving the box next to it unchecked on his mental to-do list. Would happily do it all over again.
His notice has been handed in, though. Dionysus is no longer his place of work. His contract runs until the end of the month, but he saved up holiday time. Never has to go back, if he doesn't want to.
As his fingers squeeze a little tighter on your waist, he can't help but wonder if he's making the right choices. He's been comfortable at Dionysus. Wasn't making great money, but was making enough. 
But when you squeeze your hand over his, he knows it doesn't matter. He can make all the bad decisions in the world as long as he doesn't make any that'd result in him losing you.
The weather's slowly been getting warmer over the past few weeks. As you exit the subway station, the sun confronts you with such aggression that you almost stumble from the impact of her punch.
"I'm never drinking again," you whine, bringing the hand of yours that's holding his up to cover your eyes a little. He lets you dictate his movement freely.
"You say that every time," Jeongguk reminds you, playfully nudging into your side, before rounding the corner up towards the gallery. "C'mon. Fake it till you make it. Pretend you don't have one."
"Impossible."
The remainder of the morning is slow. Every time you glance at the clock, it seems only a few minutes have passed. 
Cataloguing and processing the sales of art from the night before is laborious. It takes a lot of mental energy that you can't seem to conjure up.
Jeongguk doesn't really know how to help, but he is far stronger than you. Does all the heavy lifting as you prepare various canvases for shipping.
Eventually, he's left twiddling his thumbs, so you insist he heads straight to the gym.
"I'll meet you after," you tell him, as you sit on the floor of the gallery, crossed-legged, a pencil behind your ear and a million documents scattered around you. Jeongguk has no idea how you can work in such chaos. Finds himself getting stressed out by it.
It takes a solid fifteen minutes of assuring him you'd be fine on your own, but eventually he leaves for the gym. The way you see it, the quicker you both get your tasks for the day done, the quicker you can go back to yours, make some dinner, and call it a night. 
"Call me when you're done, yeah?" He says, lingering by the door because he just can't bear to leave you. As the sunlight peers in through the windows, small speckles of glitter sparkle on his skin. "I'll come meet you halfway."
With an ever-sincere smile, you just laugh. "Go."
Finally doing as he's told, Jeongguk walks backwards until you're out of sight. Feels his heart physically ache in his chest. Doesn't understand why he's so damn pathetic all of the time when it comes to you, just knows he wouldn't change it for the world.
Despite the solitude of an empty gallery, you're perfectly content. The lingering scent of paint and paper isn't too far removed from your place of work. Makes it easy to imagine a life where this could be your work. 
Devoting yourself to this is easy. Passion has always yielded a higher reward for you than wages, so you don't mind burning the candle at both ends.
The situation is becoming strained at best, you know. Eventually, something will have to give.
For now, though, you finish off your jobs. Arrange couriers to pick up the artworks sold, and make sure the names and numbers match the deposits with a copy of Jeongguk's business account bank statement, of which you made him print out for you.
"I can just log into my bank on your phone," Jeongguk had shrugged when you'd first asked him for it, seemingly not realising just how insane he sounded. When he clocked your look of bewilderment, he laughed. "What? It's not like you're gonna run off with all the money."
While this is true, looking at the sheer amount of money in there could make you cry. It's all so attainable now; Jeongguk's dreams and a reality in which they come true. 
So engrossed in your own thoughts, you almost jump out of your skin when a knock sounds at the doorway into the office. 
"Sorry," Shinwon hums ever so pleasantly, a smile on his face, thoroughly bemused by how startled you look. "Didn't mean to scare you."
"No, no," you shake your head, endearingly playing off your embarrassment. "I just didn't expect to see you here! Or see anyone here, for that matter."
Between exhibitions, the gallery will be closed for the next couple of weeks. It's partially to allow for the staff to reset, but mainly to allow for careful considerations of how the space will be used. 
As Jina's maternity leave cover, it's Shinwon's job, but you're yet to see any plans from him. You don't even know which artists are due to be showcased. She did say that a new vacancy would probably open up around this time, and if Shinwon doesn't start putting some tangible hard work in, you wouldn't be surprised if it's sooner rather than later.
There's been no mention of it, though. The big bosses don't seem to care about his underperformance, probably 'cause they know he's temporary.
"Just coming by to drop something off," he explains, holding up a small white envelope. Pressing it down on the desk, he looks uncertain, as if there are words dancing on the tip of his tongue. "It went well last night, didn't it?"
With a tight-lipped smile, you nod. Feel your cheeks swell. "Yeah. Went really well."
"Good," he nods. Is about to leave. Pauses when he reaches the door, and awkwardly turns to face you. Nods towards the letter on the desk. "There's gonna be a position opening up soon. You should apply. I'll put in a good word."
Furrowing your brows, you glance over the white envelope, then back to Shinwon. "But they're not hiring any—"
"Letter of resignation," he concedes with a tight-lipped smile. "I've got an overseas opportunity that I don't wanna pass on. I'll work my two weeks, but then there'll be a position to fill until Jina is back from maternity."
By overseas opportunity, he really means that some of his private school buddies are going travelling, and he wants in on the fun. This was always an opportunity of convenience for Shinwon. He was never passionate about it. Not like you are.
"Apply," he encourages. "You basically do my job as it is for free, anyway. May as well get paid for it if you can."
He doesn't stay to chitchat. Probably won't even remember your existence once he heads off on his trip. Was never in this for the right reasons.
You've resented him on plenty of occasions. Been annoyed at the fact he does fuck all and gets paid for it. Yet the idea of actually filling his (albeit incredibly small) shoes is fear-inducing.
A job at the gallery would be the first step to actually doing what you love for a living—being around art and artists. Sure, you could argue that the art cafe gives you that, but a highschooler nervously painting by numbers on a first date has nothing on the works that you see here.
There's joy to be found in your current job, though. Fun. Safety. Home.
But nothing remarkable ever happened to people who choose to remain comfortable.
Quickly finishing your to-do list, all you want to do is speak to Jeongguk about it. See what he thinks. You know it's a no-brainer. You have nothing to lose. You just want him to give you the green light that you're making the right choices.
The headache you've been battling is weak in comparison to your racing thoughts, now. You're thinking of the possibilities—of all of your hard work actually being for something. You've proven to the gallery that you can bring in punters, and that you can utilise their resources for profit. 
It's always been a case of who you know, not what you know, but you know the gallery, now. They know you. 
It could really happen. 
By the time you reach the gym, fantasies of a life with a staff ID card and access to the archives, you can't stop smiling. It'd change your life. Flip it upside down in the best of ways.
The gym is just the same as it always has been. There's a new girl behind the front desk. Not someone you recognise. Smiling as she greets you, she's keen to help, long dark hair tied into a ponytail, her branded shirt tight to her curves. You're reminded that the gym is a breeding ground for beauty, but it doesn't matter. You'll get your cardio in later beneath your sheets. 
She's also got the kind of smile that you just can't help but reciprocate. 
"I don't have a membership," you begin to explain, knowing just how troublesome it was on your first ever visit and not wanting a repeat of it. There's no way you're paying for a month, 'cause now you don't need it as an excuse just to see Jeongguk. You also can't help but overcompensate, and give far too many details in an awkward, endearing mess of an explanation. "Well, I mean, I used to have one so my details are probably on the system. Sorry, not important. I know you guys don't do day passes—"
Furrowing her brows, she kindly interrupts. "We do."
"Oh?"
"Yeah," she says, nodding towards a sign in the corner of the countertop. Clear as day, daily and weekly memberships are listed. "We've done them for as long as I've been here. Don't think it's a new policy. Anyway, happy to help—just a day membership?"
Jiyeong might be a distant memory now, but thoughts of her will never fail to irritate you.
"Yeah please," you smile regardless, sliding your card out from your pocket—and then you're over explaining again. Probably habit from the Jiyeong era. Is also probably why you make a point to mention Jeongguk by a title only you have the privilege to use. "I'm just joining my boyfriend for a session. He's—"
"Oh, he's a member?" she chirps, not rude in her interruption but efficient.
"Yeah," you nod, and are about to mention him by name, but the girl speaks too quickly again.
"Oh, you should have said! Members get a monthly plus one. It's not a free session, but it's half price, so better than nothing," she smiles. "I'll just need his gym ID—or name, I can search the system—so I can put it through."
You know she really ought to ask Jeongguk's permission. You could be any random woman. 
But you're not, and so you tell her. "Jeon Jeongguk?"
"Ah," she nods, vaguely aware of his existence. Unlike Jiyeong, she hasn't spent a substantial amount of time fawning over Jeongguk. To her, he's just another dude who comes in and leaves her alone. She appreciates it, given how some guys can be, but she also doesn't care to reward bare minimum. 
She asks you to confirm his phone number, which you can do without issue, so at least there's some level of security in place. 
It's a perfectly pleasant exchange, and it thankfully rids you of woes you didn't even realise you had. The Jieyong debacle had left a mark on you, but it feels like it's been rubbed clean. Your mind tends to jump to thoughts of her whenever he goes to the gym, and so at least you can sleep well knowing that the new girl isn't interested in any way shape or form.
Buzzing you through, she tells you to enjoy yourself—but as you start heading up the stairs to the main gym section, you already feel your regret looming. A hangover is still a hangover.
You clock Jeon Jeongguk almost immediately. How anyone isn't immediately drawn to him, you'll never understand. Just finishing up with some weights, he's re-racking the ones he's used, skin glowing with sweat. 
There's a beauty to seeing him like this. Primal desires. 
Glancing up to the mirrored wall behind the rack, Jeongguk eyes are on yours just as quickly. It's like you're magnets, destined to meet.
A confused smile etches into his exhausted face, brows furrowing as he turns to face you.
"What are you doing here?" He mouths, head puppy-like in the way it tilts. 
Shrugging your shoulders, you walk towards him. Mouth, "I just love the gym."
"Liar," he simpers when you're within earshot, reaching his hand out for you to take so he can pull you closer, of which he immediately does.
One hand clasped in his, your other hand rests on his still-heaving torso. He's gone hard today, to make up for the night before. His compression shirt is silky beneath the palms of your hands, the strong ridges and contours of his body yours to hold. Other people can look all they like. None of them get to feel. Not like you do.
As he looks down at you, there's a softness to his gaze. A smile that he doesn't care to hide. A sparkle in his eyes that shines even out of direct light. Just a consequence of looking at a star.
"You shouldn't be here," he quietly hums. "We both know you hate it."
"I can go, if you like?"
Jeongguk just shakes his head. Smiles as he turns you both around and begins to walk backwards, pulling you with him.
"You're the one who hated being here," he reminds you. "I loved you being here."
"Obsessed," you grin, gingerly letting him drag you anywhere he likes. "And good, 'cause I used your monthly plus one."
"Yeah," he confirms, ignoring the curious glances of other people in the room as he leads you back to your old 'spot'. "Thought we'd established that already? And that's fine. Use it every month."
Funny, how you used to hypothesise over the lives of other people in this very room, and how you know others must be doing the same for you now. You hope they all think you're besotted with him.
When you look at him like that, all love drunk and starry-eyed, how could they not?
"Was just about to finish up, anyway," Jeongguk tells you, heading in the direction of the treadmills. Glances back to you, then nods in their direction. "For old times sake?"
"For old times sake," you beam, following his lead, stepping up onto the treadmill closest to you. They're all vacant, but Jeongguk steps up on the one beside yours, 'cause of course he does. He'd go on the same one as you, if it were possible. 
God, he loves you being here. Can't stop smiling.   
You don't mention the potential job opening. For old times sake.
Instead, you revel in what it used to be like whenever you came to the gym, 'cause it just makes you so much more grateful for what you've become. Like Dionysus, these four walls saw the groundwork of your relationship being laid. 
You've already lost access to one of the most important places to you both with Jeongguk leaving the club. 
If you change jobs, you'll lose the art cafe, too. The lease is coming up soon on your place, and if Danbi chooses to just move in with Tae, that'll be another safe haven gone. One by one, places of your past are closing their doors to usher you forward into new spaces. 
Life can't always stay the same. Change is needed. Necessary. 
You've changed. So has Jeongguk. You'll continue to change for years to come.
The difference now is that you'll change together. Adapt. Merge, in some ways, just like a pair of orbiting stars so often do.
On the way home, Jeongguk picks up a bunch of wildflowers from the market stall he once bought you apology flowers from. His fingers are intertwined with yours as he pays, hands lightly swinging. 
It dawns on you all rather quickly, as Jeongguk nibbles on his bottom lip and waits for the payment to go through, that maybe this is a change that you needn't fight. Perhaps it's okay to look forward to your future instead of being hung up on the past. 
"C'mon," he tugs on your hand as you leave the market stall, encouraging you to gain a little momentum. "I'm starving. If we don't get me food soon, I'll turn into you with a hangover."
"Cute?"
"Oh, so close," he grins, then shakes his head. "But no. Grouchy and unbearable."
"You were practically begging to shag me," you remind him. "Can't have minded that much."
Jeongguk can't argue against this one. "I didn't—but working out increases like… all the hormones that were working overtime this morning. If I don't eat soon I might die, but if I don't shag you soon, I also might die. Honestly it's a lose-lose situation, B. There's only one solution."
"Sixty-nine?" You offer, 'cause it's perfectly logical. He gets to eat while you get him off. A win-win, you'd argue.
"You're a disgusting pervert," he tells you with stern sharpness, paired with a smirk he just can't help, as if he totally wasn't angling for you to say it. "But now that you mention it, yes. That'd be ideal."
"I don't shag boys who call me disgusting," you reply, knowing that he absolutely didn't mean it like that. You just like winding him up.
"I'm pretty sure I've called you worse before," he reminds you, then holds the flowers out in front of you both. "These can double as apology flowers instead of just my-girlfriend-is-really-pretty-and-I-love-her flowers."
You narrow your eyes as you look across to him, but the smile on his face is just too hard to resist. Thin lipped, his dimples are present, lip ring flipping in the corner of his mouth. 
It's like his lip ring does the thing and you're reduced to jelly.
"Lucky you're cute," you grumble.
"You can thank my mum for that one," he offers, fully aware of how often people would coo over his cuteness as a child and then proceed to tell his mum how similar they are. "And for how pretty I am, too."
Though he's just joking, he's right. He really is the prettiest man you've ever known, inside and out.
You won't tell him this, though. Would give him far too much negotiation power.
"Who do I thank for how annoying you are?"
“Jimin,” Jeongguk says. "That's a learned behaviour. Nurture over nature."
"Figures," you accept, before tugging on Jeongguk's hand to lead him into a grocery store. "I've got nothing in. Need to pick up food or else you'll be going hungry."
"I thought we already agreed on six—"
"A little decorum please," you cut him off. "We're in a public space."
"You said it first!"
Playfully shrugging, you let go of his hand and grab a basket as you enter. "Watcha fancy?"
"You."
"For dinner, idiot."
"B," Jeongguk sighs as if he really is hard done by. "We've already discussed this. Literally, you."
"Shut up," you laugh, and let the shopping trip descend into chaos. 
Jeongguk just puts whatever catches his eyes into the basket. Gets a kinder egg and a hot wheels car. Will surely just run it over the curves of your body when you're in bed later that evening. Also gets an entire pineapple, and when you raise an eyebrow, he just shrugs. 
"If I don't have a snack before I shower I will die," he assures you. "I'm craving a burger, so you should really be thanking me for the noble sacrifice I'm making. It benefits us both."
"You're an idiot."
"Fine, I'll get a burger."
But when he goes to put the pineapple back, you stop him. Smile. Say, "Pineapple is good."
"That's what I thought," he stands tall and proud, chest puffed, head tilted back. He looks like an asshole but god damn, does he look good doing so. As he peers down at you, you know it'll be a miracle if you even make it to the shower by the time you get home. Want him too bad.
"Stop bickering," you tell him. "Quicker we get home, the quicker we can—"
"Say no more," he nods, taking the basket from you, then zooming off up the aisle. "C'mon, B! Places to be! People to see!"
As he darts off to the next aisle, all you can do is wonder how on earth this is your life.
But it is—and when you finally find him again, standing in line to pay, basket full to the brim from his supermarket sweep, you know that all these changes happening around you really don't matter as long as you have him.
"Alright," you quietly say as you stand beside him, flicking open your phone and heading for your taxi hailing app. "I'll order a taxi. Don't want you to die on the way home."
"Teamwork," Jeongguk smiles. 
"It makes the dream work, or so I heard," you hum with a somewhat smug smile, pleased to be getting exactly what you want: time spent with Jeongguk away from the prying eyes of the three fates.
"Yeah," he quietly says, leaning over to press a kiss against the side of your head. "It sure does."
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venusiangguk · 1 year ago
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icrlr jk anon here - anything about his past life !!! i realized he's one of the jks we barely know anything about nd i got curious
When Jeongguk was a baby he was fussy... round and moody and difficult. 
As a kid, he was closer to his mom than his dad. Both his parents worked– his dad just worked more. But still, like most little boys, he wanted to grow up to be just like his dad. His mom always reassured him with a fond smile. Told him not to worry, that he was just like his father. 
Jeongguk would steal grapes when he went grocery shopping with his mom. It was his favorite thing to do when he was little because he thought it was funny when she would try not to laugh while scolding him. 
Jeongguk had always been quiet, very independent for a child but his mom was his best friend back then.
That is until his favorite color began to switch between blue and red. All because the kid down that street that he would play with, Jimin, couldn’t make up his mind. Jimin said he and Jeongguk had to have the same favorite color because they had to have at least something in common if they were going to be friends. Since Jimin liked playing ‘superheroes’ and he preferred to color. 
he was in his head a lot, daydreamed too much during class according to his teachers. his best subject in school was always art, though. he tried his best on all his art projects. he was a hard worker when he wanted to be. just like your dad, his mother would say. 
something he worked especially hard towards was being the student that was allowed to design the middle school yearbook cover. he got to and he wanted to tell his mom about it but never ended up doing so because that was around the time his parents started fighting.
he didn’t think the fights were too serious though. since his dad always said sorry for whatever it was that he had done, and since his mom always, always forgave him. 
when he was 16, his parents got divorced. his mom moved out and she didn’t take him with her. he wondered why she didn’t; if it was because he was just like his dad.   
it was bad at first, but when he turned 17 it got a little easier because that was when he discovered what it felt like to love and be loved. When he figured out a person could fix and soothe.
Things were good. And for a solid year or two, he convinced himself he could live off her forever, get lost in the way it felt to love and be loved by her. Made himself believe that getting lost in her and losing himself in her were two different things. 
When she broke his heart, it hurt. Of course, it did. But Jeongguk wasn’t traumatized. If anything he felt enlightened in a sick way. Like something clicked and he understood that it wasn’t her that he could live off of. 
It was the feeling that she gave him.
So yeah, her breaking his heart didn’t ruin him; but it definitely changed him.
It changed his perspective and the way he perceived things. Just like how finding out the reason behind his parents' divorce was his dad cheating, did. 
Jeongguk had always wanted to be just like his dad.  
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witchboyjimin · 6 months ago
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maybe something bridgerton/regency-esque with duke or even prince jk/jm - i love you’re writing and hope you’re well!! <3
jimin is probably clutching his brother's arm a little too tightly, his nerves getting the better of him, but every set of eyes in the duchess's ballroom seems to follow him around, watching his every move.
"how, exactly, are you planning to meet anyone clinging to me like this?" jihyun says, his scent wafting about them in amusement.
"why do i have to meet anyone at all?" jimin grumbles, his eyes shying to the floor when one of the lord's attempts to catch his attention.
"weren't you the one who was dying to debut?"
"a person can change their mind." jimin feels queasy, too many alpha scents attempting to drown out all of the others in the room. it's suffocating and to jimin's sensitive nose, it's headache inducing.
when he'd debuted to the ton a week ago, jimin had been excited. he grew up reading more romance novels than his mother felt was entirely appropriate -- "they'll fill your head with unrealistic expectations", "love isn't everything, jimin" -- but jimin's father never denied jimin anything, indulging his every whim. he had a huge library at home and preferred spending his time holed-up in his favourite nook reading.
it turns out that debuting meant attending ball after ball, event after event, and it all sounded delightful in jimin's novels but in practice, jimin found it rather draining. the lords milling about, attempting to court jimin, were all rather...dull.
jimin had anticipated butterflies in his stomach and a giddy rush of happiness swirling in his chest at the sight of his future mate. instead, jimin felt mostly nauseated, and rather eager to slip away.
jihyun hums under his breath, nodding to a group of mamas, all vying for his attention. they all had viable beta and omega offspring they were hoping to have mated this season. who better a candidate than jimin's older brother, earl park jihyun.
"they can't all be that bad," jihyun whispers to him, having steered jimin over to a table of pastries. he appraises the table until he finds an eclair, making a little sound of triumph.
"they're boring and only ever talk about themselves." jimin pauses, his cheeks tinging red as he recalls one particular conversation with an alpha who had made it rather clear what his intentions were. "and some of them are quite indecent."
before jihyun can reply, the ballroom seems to quiet down suddenly, everyone's attention drawn to the top of the stairs. there, to everyone's surprise, stands jeon jeongguk, the duke's only alpha son.
jimin's brows furrow together. wasn't he supposed to be on the continent for his grand tour? as far as jimin had heard, he wasn't meant to be back for another few months.
as jeongguk makes his way down the steps, the hush that had fallen over the ballroom seems to erupt into whispers. some excited, and others tinged with something else, something far more impure.
jimin knows jeongguk is probably the most eligible bachelor here. moreso even than his own brother but at five and twenty, he was hardly in a rush to find a mate.
"it appears you have some competition," jimin grins, glancing up at jihyun. he's too busy chewing on the eclair he's inhaled to care much and gives jimin a shrug.
all of the debutantes have all begun a steady crawl toward jeongguk, each eyeing their competition to get to him first. jeongguk, however, smiles past anyone brave enough to attempt a greeting and makes his way directly to his mother's side.
it just so happens that jimin and jihyun are standing not ten feet away and jimin, who hasn't seen jeongguk for some six or seven years, finds his eyes widening as he takes the duke's son in.
as an omega, jimin's path rarely crossed over with any alphas and his penchant for always having his nose in a book meant that jimin paid even less attention to whatever was going on around him. jimin's last memory of jeongguk was from several winters ago when the jeons had come to the park estate up north where they preferred to spend their holidays.
back then, jeongguk had been thin and gangly, his appetite incapable of keeping up with how quickly he'd grown. jimin hadn't paid him much attention, not that his mother would have approved if he had, and had instead spent most of their visit conversing with jeongguk's younger omega sister, jihyo.
the alpha who stands next to his mother now looks nothing like the jeongguk from jimin's memories. he's filled out nicely, his suit jacket clinging to his broad shoulders and following the lines of jeongguk's tapering torso to a slim waist. his scent, a sweet, simple vanilla, floats over to jimin who is surprised to find he enjoys it, almost as much as the sight of jeongguk's strong profile. he has a prominent nose and a jaw so sharp, jimin wonders how it's even possible. his hair curls around the tips of his ears, a little longer than what was in style.
jimin swallows, forcing himself to look away and instead flushes pink when his brother's smile grows knowing, curling into a smirk.
"we should say hello," jihyun says, already tugging jimin along.
"we do not -- "
"don't be rude, jimin. it's been years since you've seen jeongguk."
jimin, in an effort not to stumble and make a fool of himself, allows his brother to pull him over to the duchess and her son. before jihyun can even pardon their intrusion, the duchess is already grinning in delight at the sight of them and nudging jeongguk over.
"park jihyun, what a delight to see you here," she smiles, ever the gracious host. "and of course, jimin, how are you, my dear? "
"i'm doing very well, and thank you my lady," jimin greets, curtsying to the duchess. he swallows before daring to meet jeongguk's eyes and offers a smile, hoping that it doesn't appear as nervous as he feels. "jeongguk, i hadn't thought you would be joining us this season."
jimin is expecting jeongguk to brush him off as he had all his fellow debutantes but instead, jeongguk returns jimin's smile, his scent sweetening with every passing second.
"i had some rather urgent business to attend to," jeongguk replies, reaching out to shake jihyun's hand. "and of course, i couldn't miss my mama's ball."
"no, of course not," jimin agrees, wishing he could remove his suit jacket, his skin crawling with a heat that has nothing to do with the stuffy ballroom.
jeongguk can't seem to look away from jimin, his eyes sweeping up and down the length of his body and jimin has to will himself to stay still lest he squirm and give himself away.
he finds it difficult to breathe, his cheeks flushed from jeongguk's attention. the alpha is handsome in a way jimin has only heard described in books and had he really never noticed? jimin finds he can't hold eye contact, his gaze slipping away, palms sweaty.
"my lady, i was actually hoping to discuss a small matter with you, if you had the time?" jihyun asks, expertly slipping his arm out of jimin's grasp.
jimin blinks, his belly swooping with anxiety. he nearly reaches out to catch jihyun's sleeve but manages to keep his hands to himself. how could jihyun do this!
"why of course, jihyun. how can i help?" the duchess smiles, allowing jihyun to steer her away and leaving jimin standing awkwardly before jeongguk. he almost doesn't want to breathe, attempting to find a reason he can excuse himself.
"it seems your brother's left me to look after you, hmm, jimin," jeongguk says, his voice warm and tinged with laughter.
"i'm so sorry," jimin rushes to say, wishing someone he knew would walk by. "i'm sure you're very busy. you don't -- "
"i have all the time in the world for you, jimin," jeongguk interrupts, extending a hand toward jimin.
jimin's heart slips a beat, his eyes widening as he notes the deepening of jeongguk's scent, something dark seeping into the air. "you do?" he squeaks out, mesmerized by how jeongguk seems to lean in ever so slightly, the rest of the room vanishing from jimin's sight.
"who wouldn't? i've never seen such a beautiful omega," jeongguk murmurs, giving jimin's fingers a gentle squeeze when he slips his hand into jeongguk's. "may i take this as a sign that you are amenable to a dance, jimin?"
jimin only manages to nod, struck dumb by his sheer desire for jeongguk. he follows jeongguk onto the dance floor in a trance, his breath coming out in a shaky rasp when jeongguk's hand slips into the small of his back and pulls jimin in as close as is proper.
"oh," he breathes, head swimming from the proximity to jeongguk and his scent. it takes all his will power not to lean right into the crook of jeongguk's neck and inhale him in. instead, he lets jeongguk lead him around the dance floor, their eyes never parting from one another and jimin's not sure he'll ever be satisfied with just a novel again.
not when the real thing has him floating through the room, his heartbeat in his throat. is this what love was?
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